#I would want Station to be my friend sooooo bad

[stizzysupremacy]

ahhh I have such a good idea for a secret reverse sugar baby modern AU. it's sprizzy in my head but I think you could substitute other Izzy ships with only minor changes to details.

So basically the premise is that Ed left and took with him half the income that was propping up Izzy's tight budget. now that Izzy has to cover rent and bills in full instead of just half, he is struggling financially. He really can’t afford to live, honestly. But he's a proud man so he tries to hide it. Tries to tough it out and make it work.

But Lucius (or whoever you fancy) notices and tries to help without making it obvious he is helping because Izzy probably won’t accept help, especially from Lucius, off all people.

Lucius, trying to be subtle, starts:

-timing his smoke breaks so he can run into Izzy and annoy Izzy into ‘stealing’ the cigarette right out of Lucius’s mouth. because Izzy won’t ask to bum one, and helping izzy hands avoid nicotine withdrawal is basically a public service. Lucius is a hero for that.

-“ugh, I told them no pickles! Here, eat this stupid sandwich, I don’t want it anymore, I loathe pickles!” (Lucius likes pickles just fine) or getting ‘just sooooo full’ from drinking elaborate iced coffees that he can’t possibly finish more than half of his lunch and he doesn’t want to waste food but he’s going out straight after work and won’t be able to bring it home to put in the fridge for tomorrow and really you may as well eat it, Izzy, or it’s just going to sit in the trash bin stinking up the whole place.

-asking Izzy to walk him to the tube station after work ‘for safety’ but it’s really so Lucius can swipe an extra ride for Izzy on his transit card. sometimes when it’s cold and miserable enough to make Izzy ache Lucius will opt for cab or rideshare instead as soon as they hit the street, insisting it will be cheaper to split the ride. always drops Izzy off first, conveniently forgetting to split the fare

-buying izzy a cozy cashmere scarf and claiming that it was Buy One Get One Free when Lucius was scarf shopping for himself, but he didn’t see any other colors/patterns he liked and this one just screamed Izzy Hands. (And maybe a knit cap that Lucius claims he stole from the lost and found because it coordinates with the scarf so well)

-begging Izzy to come over and ‘fix’ something ‘broken’ at his place, conveniently near dinner time, just so Izzy can spend a few hours somewhere where the heat and lights aren’t turned way down low to save on utilities. Somewhere warm and bright, where the WiFi service hasn’t been turned off because of all the past due bills.

-constantly starting bets that Izzy can win. This backfires when Izzy starts to feel bad about taking Lucius’ money because he thinks Lucius is a typical starving artist type. Not knowing that Lucius makes $$$$ on furry art commissions and just doesn’t tell anyone about it because his friends, much as he loves them, have zero moderation and would cajole Lucius into partying all his savings away.

And all the while he is being sneakily generous, Lucius is trying to figure out how to trick Izzy into letting Lucius buy him a new winter wardrobe, treat him to lunch every day, and buy back the motorcycle Izzy had to pawn to pay off some debts Ed left when he blew town.

[mordremstaff]

🧸💋🐾💢 for Miss Lusine, 🔪🍑⚙️💢 for Mister Atreus 🤲❤️

Lusine - my girl the light of my life my Mists Wars princess

🧸 - Childhood friends 💋 - First kiss 🐾 - Pets 💢 - Person they can't stand Atreus - he's a bit undercooked rn bc I'm saving him for whenever (if ever) anet does a charr expansion but here's some basic info for him

🔪 - Enemy/nemesis 🍑 - Notable flings ⚙️ - Coworkers/boss (krewe/other charr outside of warband) 💢 - Person they can't stand

Lusine - Basic character concept is that she's a Keep Lord who escaped the Mist Wars and she has no memory of her life before the Mist Wars. She remembers bits and pieces of the Mist Wars but it's all sort of a haze for her, given she's been killed and reincarnated so many times. She's technically a revenant and her magic invokes the Mist forces that mantained the borderlands she was stationed. Originally, I was calling this the Fogmother but now I'm debating renaming it to the Mists Tides/something adjacent to that given Anet used Mists Tides in the new map.

She doesn't remember her childhood/saplinghood but she does remember her bestest friend/lover Philomena. They were sylvari valiants who ventured into the Mist Wars together due to Philomena's wyld hunt. They were each other's darlings and confidants and lovers, and they both adored each other. Philomena was the much stronger and scarier of the two, better at fighting and entirely devoted to her Wyld Hunt. She led a handful of other valiants and squires who were also tangled up in the Mist Wars.

2. Heeheehoohoo her first kiss was with Philomena. She doesn't remember her first first kiss, but the first kiss she remembers is also the last kiss she had with Philomena. Philomena, Lusine, and their entire unit were stationed in the Mist Wars for too long and they were all forgetting themselves. Philomena was slowly turning into the keep lord. One day, Philomena was possessed by the urge to simply leave their encampment in the borderlands. Lusine tried to get her to stay and Philomena simply turned, kissed her, said goodbye, and left. Philomena never remembered her after that, and in time Lusine forgot about Philomena too beyond the concept that she knows Philomena existed and they were lovers. They became keep lords in separate keeps. An aside here is that Lusine and her story are themed after the Greek underworld so Lusine's and Philomena's original (pre-Mist Wars) names are all rivers in the Underworld and their keeps essentially guard the land of death. This is all just set dressing/for the vibes but I like the aesthetic.

3. She has a black mare kirin named Ekaterina, who she loves very much. Ekaterina is a clever but very well-mannered kirin who mostly likes to go for long runs through the woods and loves the beach. She plays in the ocean a lot and Lusine spends long hours on the coastline with her just running through the surf and watching seals together.

4. Lusine's generally polite and not bothered by people, but she's SOOOOO bothered by @grimriddles' Erebus. She thinks Erebus is rude, brutish, and only knows how to operate as the Legions would operate. She thinks he's terrible at leading, terrible at getting people to work with him, and overall doomed to die alone fighting against something he cannot win against. She still feels really bad for him though. Erebus has the beaten dog sort of energy that she pities a lot, and she knows he's been through hell and high water. At times, she desperately wants to help him but then they get into an argument and she's like FINE!! Just die!!!! See if I care!!! And she storms off and sulks for a few hours and then comes back like >:( Ok what do you need. She recognizes the fact Erebus is like many traumatized soldiers who never learned how to navigate social situations outside the military, and on top of that has been hurt so much he's never really developed the ability to communicate any of his pain or upset or anger in a way that doesn't lead to her frustration. She's still bothered by him though, as much as she pities him and cares in her own way.

Atreus - High ranking Blood Legion centurion who heads a unit of military police. Technically part of the Blood Legion spec ops and he's in charge of internal review/investigations. He's made to be a villain, and he was very loyal to Bangar before the civil war. He didn't flip sides to the Dominion though as he was afflicted with both 1) inertia and 2) adherence to a system that he knows and is frightened to move away from. That being said, he's no die-hard loyalist to Crecia and isn't entirely on board with changes in Blood Legion. Very "it worked the old way the new way is just for weaklings and people who couldn't succeed in the past." He's shady af as he's done a ton of cover ups for spec ops and Blood Legion in the past but he only does so within the military culture and system that's been built.

He doesn't have like a specific enemy/nemesis right now. I feel like maybe the one secretary in another unit that refuses to file his paperwork on time? The legal team that keeps spending forever on contracts and it takes 1083501830835085 rounds of letters for anything to move through? The one barista who REFUSES to give him enough ice in his iced coffee. One ice cube?? Just ONE?? Expect this answer to change in the future once I rp him more. He just doesn't have a reason to obsessively hate someone right now but I love an enemy/nemesis situation so it's gonna happen. Eventually.

2. He uh. Had a rly intense fling with a higher ranking officer when he was young and a huge bastard. The officer basically raised him to be as intense and deadly and frightening as he is right now, and really cultivated his extreme loyalty to Bangar. He was already really loyal because his parents were really high-ranking Blood Legion spec ops soldiers, so he was from the sort of pedigree that meant he was expected to serve just as well if not better than his parents did. The officer basically saw a bastard who had a lot of potential and a lot to prove and was like I could make this worse, which leads to how Atreus is today.

3. He's a centurion, so he's got a lot of coworkers and whatever higher ranking centurions, tribunes, and so on are above him. His warband is the Quill warband, given he's basically a desk jockey nowadays. Not a lot to say about his coworkers. They do their jobs and do as told. Behind his persona of a desk jockey, there lies a sinister and very politically savvy mind that likes to use paperwork and gaming the system to pull the strings he needs or wants.

4. I haven't rp'd him enough for him to develop a singular sort of hatred. In general though, he's got a hatred for gladia and anyone who wants to change the Blood Legion system. His mindset on it is basically the Blood Legion and all the legions are built off the backs of the soldiers underneath. If you don't have strong soldiers, you have a weak legion. So the gladia either learn to serve or they need to go, and any change to the system will introduce weakness that will make Blood Legion topple.

[subwaytostardew]

Sooooo, what do the twins say when you give them a bouquet then a mermaid's pendant respectively?

Sorry for the delay! I actually hadn't written their dialogue until this ask prompted me to. Partially because it's optional and the vanilla NPCs all share the same generic dialogue strings... We haven't quite posted much nor finished Emmet's heart events yet but well... His relationship progression takes into account that you get the "Best Friends" achievement after reaching 10 hearts.

▷ Station Steward Thylak

▲ Ingo ▲

Bouquet rejection: "Ah! What a lovely gift! Did you grow these yourself? You have my gratitude, @! Though… by the look of your expression… perhaps I am misinterpreting this gesture?"

"AH! Ehem… I-I see you want to become more serious. I apologize for not understanding your intended tracks right away, but I must decline. As much as I enjoy your company, I believe we should refrain from speeding too far ahead of ourselves…"

Mermaid Pendant Rejection: "A mermaid pendant? H-how kind of you to further educate myself on your local customs…"

"A-ah! Y-you intend to couple as a two-car train in m-marriage? I apologize… I believe you are speeding too far ahead of our tracks. I'm not quite ready to conduct such matters at the moment."

Bothering After Rejection A: "Ehem! I've told you, I must refuse. Do not force me to speed ahead on such hasty decisions... Please... Refrain from such requests for the time being..."

Bothering After Rejection B: "I do not recall what would have led your train of thought down those tracks, but if I have done something to make you think otherwise… E-ehem… O-once again, my apologies…"

Bouquet Acceptance: "A-AH! THIS- This is…! Oh dear… Emmet isn't stationed nearby to witness such a display of a-affection, is he?"

"Ah… forget it! I suppose I've repressed my feelings for far too long. You deserve everything and so much more, my dear! From the innermost region of my heart's engine, thank you for taking the initiative with such a lovely bouquet! I will try my best to conduct our love openly and to the fullest, as is right! It is my sworn duty as your b-b-b… b-boyfriend, after all!"

Mermaid Pendant Acceptance: "O-OH…! D-dearest…! Is that…?! I can't believe it… You w-wish to… D-do you really mean… C-could it be? I'm not misinterpreting anything, am I? Is this but a dream? Do you really wish to c-couple as a two-car train… on the tracks set for the station of m-matrimony?"

"AH… I-IS THAT… Is that so… Pardon the interruption, but if it's not t-too much, I request that you wait a moment as I realign my cab in proper operating condition!"

"[Ingo bursts into tears, loudly sobbing as he trembles with- what you know as- a wavering smile on his face. His heartbeat races at full steam. He's so overwhelmed with emotion… His state of elation, the relief of knowing that you share the same dedication to him as he does you… It's all too much for him! Between his choked-up cries, you hear Ingo sputter out proclamations of love and desperate pleas for this moment to not be another mere fantasy alongside stuttered- but loud-'BRAVO's.]"

"A-ah… Ahem! Please, forgive me for the delay! I hope that my sudden outburst didn't set your train of thought on the wrong track! I have never awaited such a journey more than that on our horizon...! Of course, I accept! Thank you… thank you for granting me my most cherished ideal! I promise to pursue even greater heights coupled with you as your h-husband, with no terminal called 'End' in our m-married life together!"

▽ Emmet ▽

Bouquet rejection: "Stop giving me gifts. I am Emmet. I feel bad. Huh? Dating? Absolutely not. I don't really trust you. I don't like those jokes…"

Mermaid Pendant Rejection: "Oh. No. Is this supposed to be a joke? I am Emmet. I remember this. Ingo said those were for marriage proposals. I don't really know you. I don't want you. That's not nice. Don't do that."

Bothering After Rejection A: "What did I say? I said no. Stop that."

Bothering After Rejection B: "Do you think that's funny? I don't. Be serious."

Bouquet Acceptance: "Thank you for the flowers! They are verrry pretty. Is it okay if I press them? I want to keep them forever. I want to keep you forever. You mean so much to me."

"Huh? You want to get more serious? Good. You should. I feel the same way. This is why you're my favorite person. Let's have more fun! Is it okay if I take a picture of us with them? I like keeping reminders that you like me. I love the flowers. Verrry much. But your smile is my favorite gift! Can I have it?"

Mermaid Pendant Acceptance: "You… went out into the rain for me? Are you serious? You're not lying to me, are you? I can trust you. Right?"

"[Emmet stares at you silently with a desperate look in his eyes, teary as he awaits confirmation in his safety check. When you reassure him that you are indeed serious about your love for him, he pulls you into a verrrrry tight hug, smiling into the kisses he presses all over your face.]"

"Mm… I am Emmet. You wanted to marry me, too… I love you. Verrrry much! I'm serious. Really serious. Because if a love isn't serious. It isn't fun. I want to keep having fun with you. Always."

"Hm… You beat me to it! I wanted to propose. But I will not lose again. Our wedding starts in three days. I have everything planned. Be ready. I already set everything up. If your clothes got ruined in the rain. Don't worry. I already prepared an outfit for you. Just bring that perfect smile of yours! We are going to be each other's everything. Verrry soon. Coupled as a two-car train. Our tracks go on forever! I am Emmet. I will be all you'll ever need. I love you! Let's have more fun!"

[grntaire]

oomfie you're from the boston area right... i'm going on a trip there (and then to buffalo) next week and if you're willing to spare some hot tips they would be greatly appreciated... especially for like queer shows or clubs or whateva :0 only if you want to spare such info ofc!

omg yeah i got you!!

for queer places my fav is club cafe <3 good vibes generally and their food is LIT. cathedral station is a queer sports bar but it's really just a cool space all-around, and blend in dorchester is great too! be warned it's the last few weeks of this season of drag race so if you're out at a queer place on a friday night it'll be insane to get a spot

for more general things, take a walk through boston common bc it really is gorg! hit up the prudential center and there's restaurants that half rooftop access and i think (?) there's a place at the top where you can see the whole city it's gorgeous :)

faneuil hall/quincy market is def super touristy but the area around there has interesting historical buildings which i think is worth checking out!

boston also has some lit museums: i've been to the aquarium, the museum of science, and the museum of fine arts, and are all super fun! i've never been to the isabella stewart gardner museum but it's up next on my boston list bc a) it's beautiful but also b) it's home to the hightest-value museum art theft in history and they have the empty frames up on the wall which is kind of metal imo.

if you're into classical music i have friends singing at symphony hall in bach's b minor mass next week which if you haven't heard, it's sooooo good

the subways (aka the "t") is... not great but is convenient to get around the city. it runs until about 1am, sometimes almost 2 depending on if it's a weekend or if there's a game at the garden or not. but it's not too tricky to navigate, you're either going inbound or outbound and the lines are all colors. imo it's easier to understand than the mta in new york but i also grew up with it lol

i hope this was helpful & feel free to hit me up as it gets closer! i love boston and as much as massachusetts ppl get a bad rep for being rude it's very much that we're a people who are kind but not nice–any local will gladly help you on your way!

[beautifult999]

It was the night before Christmas and I was walking at least 12 hours straight, it was like 11pm at night and I was really fucking tired and needed sugar and something to eat and I wanted to smoke, I was like so tired and dehydrated. So this guy took me to his house and smoked me out and we had sex and he let me nap for an hour before his grandma woke up and I left at like 1am with like one or two cigarettes that I had left and 60cents. I needed to eat sooooo fucking bad and I somehow got a dollar from someone that night and I got a pepsi and cosmic brownie. Then at the gas station this guy and an escort picked me up they gave me a couple hits and took me to their hotel room and let me shower and rest and eat snacks and gave me $10. I left that Christmas morning and said hi to my friends at North Street.

Edit: he gave me a grape faygo before I smoked or I would have died on impact

[cosmogyros]

I know I haven't been on here lately ahhhh but I have been spending every free moment READING, because with every year older that I get, I feel less and less knowledgeable... and I must remedy this. Although, frankly, I think I might be overdoing it a bit because. um. my full-time job also requires reading eight hours a day. And I'm starting to feel a bit Worn.

That said, here's my "currently reading" list with disorganized commentary:

Miteinander reden - Friedemann Schulz von Thun (I am enjoying this one but moving through it very slowly so far because it keeps giving me Ideas that I need to write about immediately or else message friends about, and then I forget to return to the book and keep reading)

Capitalism: A Very Short Introduction - James Fulcher (crap I forgot I was reading this actually, I need to get back to it)

Le lieutenant de Kouta - Massa Makan Diabaté (This is progressing slowly because I'm hand-copying it as I go, but at least it's generally quite an easy read, and particularly interesting to me because it's set in Mali, a country that is a special interest of mine)

Et si c'était vrai - Marc Levy (I started this, paused it when I briefly lost interest, then restarted; we'll see if I can maintain the motivation this time)

Dracula - Bram Stoker (yes! I am doing Dracula Daily! oh it's such a treat to return to this wonderful book ❤️)

Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy - Jessica Fern (I posted about wanting to read this book and then two friends messaged me separately saying they'd been wanting to as well, so obviously I did what anyone would do and made a group chat, introduced 'em to each other, and we're a mini-book-club now)

Sauve-Moi - Guillaume Musso (I started this just for the heck of it and I'm sorry but it's so bad so far. so bad. The protagonist looks in the mirror after a shower as an excuse to have her describe herself. And yes, she mentions her breasts. And then she wonders if, at 28, she's still desirable. I may not be able to stick this one out.)

Delusions of Gender - Cordelia Fine (I have been having memory issues again recently, so I can't remember a blessed thing about this book despite having started it... mayyyybe two weeks ago? I should probably stop reading so many things at once and give my poor brain-damaged head a break 🙃)

The ABCs of Socialism - Bhaskar Sunkara et al. (I have sooooo much to learn about socialism, and I guess I am starting here; already learned the difference between private property and personal property, so we're off to a good start)

Les Fiancés de l'hiver - Christelle Dabos (not my usual genre but I spontaneously joined a French book club that chose it as our first book, so hey! and it's not bad so far)

Mating in Captivity - Esther Perel (one of those "been on my TBR forever" books that I finally dove into when another friend mentioned starting it and I said "ooh ooh I'll read it with you!")

I also started reading Les Misérables and Le deuxième sexe but I am trying to FORCE myself to hold off on them for now and finish my somewhat more accessible French books first, before returning to those heavy-hitters. Oh and there's Vere aux Fantazie, the collection of short pieces in Esperanto that I really have no excuse for not having finished yet, seeing as I started it... a year and a half ago.

But honestly right now my current-reading list is too full of non-English stuff and/or nonfiction, and I think it would be wise to ease up on myself a bit and read some nice light compelling English-language fiction to balance out the rest of this mess. The last fiction book I finished in English was Station Eleven by Emily St. John Mandel, a recommendation from a friend, which threw me for a fucking LOOP when I finished it a few days ago. Instantly went on my favorites list, but damn, I'm still licking my wounds.

[galxticdaisy]

Secretly I feel so sad and lonely. I’m 21 turning 22 soon and have never been in a relationship. Literally all my friends have but I haven’t. It’s not like absolutely no one is interested, the problem is I’m not interested in any of my options 😔 I know I need to be happy on my own and the right guy will come when I’m not looking and blah blah blah….. but the thing is I AM happy with my own company, I will sometimes literally avoid people so that I can enjoy my own company. It’s just that sometimes when I’ve had a good day or even a bad day it would be nice to come home and share that with someone. Sure I could share it with my friends but I just spent the day with them. And I know I could share it with my family but it’s just not the same.

However I did meet a guy that I liked a couple of weeks ago, his name is Ryoto and he is sooooo cute! And funny! And kind! The problem is that he doesn’t live in my country. He lives in Japan and is currently backpacking to different countries until January/February 2023 - he was only briefly visiting my city. We only got to spend about 15 hours together before he had to leave😭 Those 15 hours were some of the best moments of my life. We talked, laughed together and even made love. It was like I had a glimpse of what having a real boyfriend would be like. He cuddled me so tightly and kissed me so passionately - I didn’t want it to end. He kept telling me how happy he was and that he didn’t want to leave. It all just felt right. Eventually I gave him a goodbye kiss, delivered him to the train station and we parted ways. I still have him on Instagram and am planning to send him a birthday message on august 26th! Since then I’ve been increasingly feeling a sense of sadness, realising that this life is hard if you don’t have anyone. Hopefully we will meet again very soon. 🌠

[specsforwoo]

Son of Lachesis | Demigod!Jung Jaehyun

Parent Deity: Lachesis (Goddes of the String of Life; the Second Fate)

Allegiance: Hades

Dark Humor was a thing

He probably picked it up from his dad

His dad was this super successful thriller author

So they had this huge penthouse in New York but Jaehyun was your normal edgy emo teenager

He claimed to hate his life, hate his family, hate his friends

But like, his dad wasn’t bothered by it???

At first Jaehyun thought it was because his dad just didn’t care about him

But then he started to realize that his dad was the same way

He would rather disparage himself in the name of humor than anything else

It was more of a coping technique but oh well

And for some reason, Jaehyun’s senior year of highschool, he moved to Korea

Still doesn’t know why tbh

Something about his dad telling him that it was safer for their family to be closer together

But like his family only comprised of himself and his dad

And his beagle Chu-Chu but that’s it

As far as he knew, he didn’t have any family in Korea

But surprisingly, he fit in well

His last year of high school went by quickly

And soon he was accepted into the medical examiner’s program @ KAIST

What?

He felt more comfortable around cadavers than live humans

It wasn’t weird he just had hella social anxiety

He had a real gift for it too

He could just look at a body and be able to tell how they died

He was oddly able to tell how long ago they died too

He was actually starting to get creeped out by it

So he started talking to the only person he could ever confide in

His dad

It was a long weekend off of uni

And the Friday before he got into a huge argument with his toxicology professor about the substance that one man ingested that led to his death

His professor swore it was Croton tiglium

And he doesn’t know why but something in his gut was screaming that the diagnosis was wrong

So what did he do?

He stole the toxicology report to review it

And he barged into his professor’s office claiming it was actually Daphne mezereum

What scared him the most was that he could swear the man who was lying helplessly on the table was the one who told him what the poison was

So back to his dad’s apartment

Jaehyun was in tears explaining what had been going on to his dad

And sure his dad was the one to lighten up any room he could

But his dad just laughed

And for the first time he actually felt like he was going crazy

He thought that if anyone would be able to help him understand it would be his dad

I mean what was that Ph.D in psychology hanging on the wall for then

But his dad placed a hand on his shoulder and talked to him very calmly.

I think it’s time that you met your mother.

Sniffing, he looked up

I thought she had been dead since I was a baby.

Sorta…

How can someone be ‘sorta’ dead?

She’s more like… undead?

Suddenly a gray smoke started swarming around his feet.

And a young woman, dressed in black with a rose in her hair appeared behind his dad

Jaehyun almost screamed

Dear, Many people are in need to relief so why are you calling me up?

She spoke and her voice was as light of as the mist swirling around her feet

She looked up and made eye contact with Jaehyun

Dear, you know how dangerous it is for them to meet their other parents… why is he here?

She didn’t break eye contact with Jaehyun as she spoke to his father

It’s time he knew. Maybe Taeyong or Yuta could help him? They’ve been through this before.

The anxiety and stress was piling up on Jaehyun until he couldn’t stand it anymore

Knew what? Who is this? Why is our apartment filling with smoke? What have Taeyong and Yuta been through before?

You are a demigod Jaehyun. The woman spoke up, inching closer to his side.

My son, the son of Lacheses.

Lacheses…. The goddess of the string of fate.

I’m the son of a death goddess.

He burst out laughing

He couldn’t tell if it was from shock or denial

Everything made sense

His ominous ability to tell how people died

How long they would live for

So you are telling me Taeyong and Yuta are demigods too?

He looked between his mother and father

Yes, sons of Themis and Bia, respectively of course.

So that summer Jaehyun ended up going to camp with Taeyong

He didn’t feel that comfortable in the Hades cabin, and ended up rooming with Sicheng in the Achelios cabin instead

He also tended to help out with medical care when super dangerous competitions were taking place

If he remembered correctly, Sicheng asked him to because your weird ass ability to tell how long people have to live comes in handy so I can override it.

He said it with all smile on his face too, like people thought Jae was creepy

He is still actively attending uni, still the top student is his toxicology class, despite his prof throwing the hardest cases his way

HE EVEN GOT AN INTERNSHIP AT THE POLICE STATION YAY JAEHYUN

But camp is his life now

He never knew what he would have done if he didn’t have the support system that he did because of it

Yuta is his best friend

Partly because they are apparently first cousins

But also because they just mesh really well together

Whenever Yuta is fighting or practicing

He is there to makes sure to call game before anyone gets fatally injured

It actually got close one time

But other than that

His life is really normal

He eats out a lot

He studies a lot less than he should

He has made lasting friendships

And he has the hugest crush in the world that he refuses to reveal

hey , you

Just tell me! You know I can keep a secret from the hyungs!

Cue Jisung pestering him as they run the track at camp

How do I know that?

Taeyong still hasn’t found out that Chenle and I sneak out every Saturday to go to the arcade and that we were the ones who broke his cat mug.

Good Point.

Sooooo?

Still not telling.

Honestly though, not like it wasn’t obvious enough

Sometimes he wonders if everyone is oblivious to him staring at the back of your head while you run rounds for Sicheng

Or how his eyes follow your figure when he spots you in a crowd

Dude has it bad

And might be a little possessive too

He saw Taeil hug you once and he refused to talk to Taeil for a week

Until Kun saw what was going on and forced them to make up

But you

Girl you might have an even bigger crush

Who knew volunteering was so fun when you got to see Jaehyun every day

Highkey only Renjun knows that you both like each other

What? Renjun knows E V E R Y T H I N G

At least he is like ‘passively’ helping Jaehyun score a date with you

And by ‘passively’ I mean he straight up walked over to you and asked you if you would want to grab dinner with Jaehyun on Thursday, something about studying for toxicology finals

And by ‘passively’ I also mean him straight up telling Jaehyun that you were going to be a the hole in the wall diner on 53rd street a 7 o’clock and if he didn’t show up he was going to kick his ass

So you both showed up

You with study materials

And him with flowers

Johnny told him that flowers were always the way to go

And Jaehyun was beyond embarrassed and confused when you looked up and saw him standing there in a button down shirt that definitely wasn’t his holding a bouquet of flowers

And you were sitting there in sweatpants and your glasses falling down the bridge of your nose

So he did what he does best

Laugh it off

Oh, these are to thank you for helping me study.

Of course, you didn’t have to get me anything though.

In his head he is sitting there cussing Renjun out while also trying to create that empathy link with Yuta so he could tell Yuta to go beat his ass

But he brushed it off and starts studying with you

Only after ordering pecan pie and hot chocolate

Because everyone needs snacks for studying

Right

But you suddenly looked up and stared him straight in the eyes

Why do you even need my help? Aren’t you like top of this class, and IDK you can talk to dead people? Just ask them what happened.

Jaehyun is back to being embarrassed and this time he can’t laugh it off

Well– ummm— you see– Renjun— I—-

Oh for Zeus’ sake can’t you just say that little twerp set us up on a date?

Well… yeah, yeah he did.

YoU — umm— you can leave if you want, I understand if you don’t like me

Why would I leave. And you shouldn’t understand because you are a great guy, of course I like you.

You gave off a cheeky smile before stealing a bite of his pie

Y’all started off really casually

Like a group date here and there, nothing alone

Something in Jaehyun told him it wasn’t going to get serious unless he made the first move

Your father was probably to blame

Zeus was known for being a little aloof when it came to love

But Jaehyun

God Jaehyun had no guts whatsoever

Not until his best friend from New York came to town

Jameson had come to visit over his own spring break, claiming he wanted to see why Korea was so special and “Jeff” as he knew him, never returned to the US

And Jaehyun had taken you with him to the airport, better than dragging along Jeno or Jungwoo, who for some reason was terrified of planes themselves, and Yuta was out of town for a competition and Johnny was still passed out from last night’s party

And when Jameson stepped off the plane, he came barrelling towards Jaehyun, screaming JEFFFFFFERRRRRYYYYY as loud as he could and tackled him into a hug.

After that he began speaking in English a mile a minute

To say you were a deer caught in the headlights was an understatement

Jaehyun obviously wasn’t fazed, he was able to talk back to Jameson at the same speed, not even stuttering

So you felt kinda lost, shrinking away from the boistering boys, opting instead to starting rolling his friend’s luggage to the car

Jaehyun caught wind of your suddenly shy personality and cut off his friend to instead walk over to you

In a much calmer voice, and this time in a language you were actually able to understand, Jaehyun asked if you wanted to be introduced to his friend

You nodded and Jaehyun grabbed your wrist before shutting the trunk of the car.

Pulling you back over, Jaehyun spoke in English again

You could barely make out something along the lines of This is my friend, Y/N, daughter of Zeus.

You gave a small wave and bowed, hoping he wouldn’t speak to you directly, prompting you to speak in your broken tongue.

Just a friend, or something more? Jameson smirked at Jaehyun before looking back over at you

A friend that you can’t have. You couldn’t really understand what Jaehyun said but you could tell that whatever was said, he wasn’t happy about his friend’s comment.

After that you all got into the car where Jaehyun made you sit in the front seat, holding your wrist the entire time, in obvious view of Jameson

Things died down for a while and it went back to the usual

You were still on the track team (more like Pegasus Racing team but whatever)

And Jae came to cheer you on at every game

And Jae was still top of his classes @ KAIST

And you came to cheer him up when the workload got to much for him

But it STILL wasn’t serious

So one night

Specifically, Jameson’s last night in Korea

Everyone decided to head out to Hongdae to go club hopping (pls tell me you people know what club hopping is)

And you were all having fun, dancing, most were also drinking, especially Jameson

Jaehyun somehow ended up being DD after a brutal battle of scissors, paper, rock

So he was sitting there on the side lines, nursing straight tonic water watching everyone else get shit-faced drunk

You weren’t any better to be honest

Jameson started having a habit of trying to get you alone or get you to dance with him

So you thought that if you had to deal with that all night you had to have a couple shots in your system.

PSA TIME PEOPLE!!!!!! PSA!!!!! If someone in your group keeps trying to get you alone or get you to dance with them, both men and women, DO NOT I repeat DO NOT resort to drinking to deal with it. If they don’t get the hint by you avoiding them, tell them straight to their face that you don’t want to be with them. If they still don’t get the hint, seriously consider just leaving wherever you are. Under no circumstances is it okay for them do that. PSA OVER!!!!

Jaehyun had been watching you try to avoid Jameson from the bar all night and after Jameson came up behind you and grabbed your waist he was done

The vision of fully sober, properly pissed off, ready to throw punches Jaehyun was not a pretty sight

Thankfully, at the moment he had enough self-control in his system to not deck his friend straight in the throat

He instead opted to grab your wrist, much more forcefully than last time, and drag you out the back door of the club into the alley way

Then, much more gently, backed you into the wall of the club

He was so close that you could feel his breath on your forehead

Muttering to himself in English, you couldn’t understand what he was saying

Suddenly he looked down and his eyes kept snapping from yours to your lips

I’m probably going to do something I regret right now

Poor you couldn’t even understand him because of him still speaking in English

Next thing you know he was kissing you, pushing you up further against the wall, wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you closer

After he let go, worry flashed across his face, like he finally realized something

Oh my god, did that bastard hurt you?

He started checking your arms and wrists, even running his hands along your waist to make sure there wasn’t bruising there

For once, Jaehyun actually had the guts

He ended up calling everyone rides, and left early with you so he could take you out on an ‘official first date’

To an ice cream shoppe

Mind you average temps in Korea during, let’s say March is still around 28 degrees Fahrenheit @ night

He realized his mistake after seeing you sit there in the booth, shivering as you picked up your ice cream

So he quickly shrugged off his jacket, wrapping it around your shoulders and grabbing your hands in his to warm them up

First date was still a success in his mind

And all the dates there after

Renjun takes full credit for your relationship, but so does Sicheng, they actually fight about this

Jameson actually isn’t in Jaehyun’s life anymore

And Jaehyun is madly in love with you

Proposes after he graduates, in front of all of his friends, @ the stupid little hole-in-the-wall diner that he claims was his first real date with you

While they all scream JEFFFERRRRYYYY in the background.

really tho, Yuta has it on tape, along with Doyoung forced feeding Jaehyun wine, and him sleep talking about your first official date, all of which he plays at your guy’s wedding

Good luck having all of these idiots as brother in laws :::)))))

[solesurvivorpaigeargot]

I absolutely LOVE Sketchy Saturdays and I always look forward to them!! As for my question(s)? What made you decide to start doing it(I'm glad you do but I was just curious!)?

Hoooo boi the Sketchy Saturday Origin Story: I suppose there's two versions.

The short version reads " Moving stress, deployment depression, and isolation VS. my utter determination to DO SOMETHING whilst trapped in my home " -- Sketchy Saturday was the result of that title fight, so I guess the fandom won in the end? XD

The long version, however... Well, buckle up, cause this is gonna be a ride.

It may surprise y'all to know that two years I was eyeballs-deep in the South Park fandom. The blog still exists; my mainblog, JustCallMeButtlord, built to interact with the audience of my fanfictions-- the New Kid Stories, called NKS for short [gonna be porting those to Ao3 soon, just gotta figure out what robo-reader I'm gonna use to make a quick n dirty podfic out of the series as well as help me hunt down typos my eyes galze over]. The first 'season' of stories had ended, 8 completed fics, and I was puttering about with a bonus holiday story that was several months out of season. Not that I CARED because I was on GUAM where seasons don't exist and my time blindness gets even worse becasue without seasons changing it feels like time never progrsses even after being on the island for three cocksucking years.

I don't hate Guam, I am just not built for constant heat. I am a snow creature; I like below-freezing temperatures so I can layer up in fuzzy, fluffy things and drink hot drinks and cuddle loved ones and/or furry animals. It's a lovely island, I adored my first week there... I just wasn't made to live there.

HIlariously, NKS started out of the stress of moving to Guam. Two years and 8 fics later, the place we were renting was no longer within our price range and my hubby and I were forced to move onto base. Under the leader whom I refuse to name, military pay was given a precentage raise... but it was ripped out of bonuses and OCONUS pay. OCONUS is what a military member is paid when they're stationed Outisde the CONtinental United States. This usually means overseas bases like Japan, but it also means Hawaii, aaaaaand... GUAM. So that percentage pay increase for the military at large meant belt-tightening for every service member abroad, and we were forced to move onto base.

In case y'all haven't noticed by now, I'm a raging socialist with some issued with authority. I DO NOT LIKE EXISTING ON BASE. I do not like existing in a place where the national anthem plays twice a day, every day, at 6 AM and then again whenever the hell sundown is that day. And there's an unspoken rule no one tells you that when it plays you're supposed to stop what you're doing, face the nearest set of speakers playing the song, and stare in that direction with your hand over your heart until its over. That, if you're driving, you have to put on your emergency flashers and pull over. No one tells you this. NO ONE TELLS YOU THIS.

And then, before we had secured a place on base but we had set a move out date for the rental house, the Pandemic happened. While we were between homes. The base is talking full lockdown, Guam authorities want to shut down the island but businesses are terrified of not getting the tourist season business, we don't even know if we'll be allowed to move on to base.

Surprise, I stopped writing for a while... but I picked Fallout 4 back up again. I had been forced into the series years earlier by a toxic relationship, but the game itself hadn't been bad-- just the way I'd been forced to play it by someone who was firmly not in my life anymore. When confronted with character creation, I wasn't sure whom I wanted to make... but decided to go back to an old character. A VERY old character, whom I hadn't thought of since I'd finished ME3 at least 4 years prior, and a character I first conceived of when I was 14-ish... which is now about 15 years ago.

Paige.

I've talked before about how well Paige's story maps onto Fo4, but this was before I knew that. I knew the opening, her losing her kid, and that fit with her-- but something clicked while I was playing and the part of my brain that likes to create started wandering off. Soon enough I've got a couple chapters of a ficlet that I'm TOTALLY just writing as a personal one-shot to de-stress, no way I'm publishing this, I don't wanna get distracted from NKS, I got a whole 'nother season to write! Who cares if no one is reading it anymore because South Park Fandom doesn't like continuous plots.... right?

I was burnt out as hell, the move was looming, the Pandemic was getting worse and everything was getting scarier.

Then the news came through that hubby would be deploying again.

He wasn't supposed to, but the Navy decided the safest place for their sailors was the middle of the ocean, so if you WERENT in quarantine you were going on the boat and you were living there. Didn't matter if your spouse would be alone, unpacking a whole home by themselves.

I had a friend on base. We hung out. I met with my DND group on weekends; we all lived on base now, so we could meet up in like five minutes... and then restrictions tightened. You could be fined up to 5 grand for gathering in groups greater than 5, even outdoors, and detained if suspected of going to a home that wasn't yours. I still met 2 of my friends once a week for walks; get outside, be active, talk to other humans, but besides that? I was locked up alone in a new house in a place that I did NOT like existing in.... with a fresh new hyperfixation developing.

I think it was about a week into the new house that I made the new blog. At first I tried to run it side by side with the South Park stuff, but it wasn't long before all my attention was here... aaaand it also wasn't long before I was confronted with a lot of my own despair; of lockdown, of isolation, of watching a broken system crumble and not being able to DO anything about it, and I started to kinda lose my shit. I fuss-- I can't leave things alone, and I couldn't leave this feeling alone; of being fully and entirely helpless and hopeless.

And then I sketched a thing for a friend, and it made them happy. They were having a rough time, too, and I put something together because I couldn't think of anything else. And it helped. It lifted them up, and it lifted me up, too. Someone else had recently reblogged one of those pallet challenges that floats around Tumblr, and I decided FUCK IT LET'S DO THIS THING AND CALL IT SKETCHY SATURDAY!

Little secret, the very first Sketchy Saturday request? Was me. I was so scared no one would noticed the event, I sent myself the very first request, back when the event still took anons. Soon as that first picture was up:

BANG, suddenly four more; some people off anon. I met people that day, talked to them after the very first Sketchy weekend was over, chatted about the games and characters and art and writing and just... felt human for the first time in a really long while.

I figured I'd hold on to Sketchy Saturday until the deployment was over-- once hubby was back, I'd decide whether I was keeping it or not... but he came back, and I was still super into it, and he was supportive, sooooo I kept going! And then we did Sketchy Secret Santa, and people loved it, and my volunteers are excited about being Sketchy Elves and Secret Helpers and just OH MY GOD I DID A THING GUYS. I DID A THING-- that was just me all December and January long lmafo.

AND JANUARY! Because AH HECK, WE MOVING AGAIN! Because hubby finally got orders, and OH MY GOD we're going back to WA... but it's still a move half-way around the globe, and I was SURE I'd have to shut down the event for a month while we got our shit in order and NOPE, because here come the volunteers from Sketchy Secret Santa, and they wanna fill in all month long! Like... I didn't even ask for that shit, guys. They offered it so the event wouldn't have to take a gap.

Jesus I'm getting teary just remembering it.

So yeah. Sketchy Saturday is here because I got really lonely and stressed out while Fallout 4 provided me with some... catharsis for my situation, and then a pandemic happened.

And then y'all happened, and I'm still here. :D

[reylo-musings]

The Stoicism of Chanel Boots Luke

I want to speak to the idea of Luke’s characterization feeling “off” or “not like him” in his appearance when he comes to answer Grogu’s call. People have stated that the “Real Luke Skywalker” would have spoken words of comfort, would have gotten down on one knee to speak with Grogu, would have been warm and open, not cold and stoic. My genuine question is this, “Where does this type of understanding of Luke’s characterization come from?”

In Return of the Jedi, Luke shows up in his killer black outfit with Chanel boots serving Straight Looks, speaking with a new-found confidence that is both attractive yet still quite awkward. Luke tells a still-mostly-blind Han that he’s “taken care of everything” and that they have no worries of dying in the Sarlacc pit, and Han’s response is just “Oh. *Rolls eyes* Great.”. Sure, he’s been frozen in carbonite for a while (and can’t see the killer outfit change) but it’s clear that, to Han, Luke is no Savior, no God. He’s just this kid who Han has grown quite attached to who likes to play with laser swords and is into some weird stuff at the moment. Even to those with fully functional eyes, Luke’s fighting style on Jabba’s cruiser is quite green, and not just because of the glow of his saber. He’s awkward, gets shot in the hand, and lacks what some would probably consider to be “Jedi Knight Fighting Finesse”. But completely in his defense, he only first held a lightsaber 4 years prior, and really has only been training for a year at this point. 

Even when Luke is tied up in preparation to be a main course at an Ewok feast, he speaks with that same awkward confidence, one that he is honing into but still feels oddly out of touch at this point. You can see that he is beginning to view his purpose in this adventure with his friends quite differently. No longer is he just the kid kinda tagging along while Han is wielding a blaster and running full force into danger with Chewy. Luke is now the one that can use his connection to the Force to aid the adventure in a different way, to offer his own unique brand of help to his friends. 

After they’re inducted into the tribe and Luke retreats outside for a quiet moment, Leia inquires as to what’s bothering him and he again speaks in calm measured statements. There is little to no emotion as he tells how he has no memory of his mother - how he fears he is endangering the mission of his friends because of his connection to Vader. These are things that Poncho Luke would have been hysterical over, but Chanel Boots Luke is discovering that his role as Jedi Knight is more than just slicing things with a lightsaber and lifting rocks. It’s about his calm and rationalized approach to his struggles as well as the struggles of the galaxy. 

Luke’s first actual show of emotion in this film is when he is overwhelmed by anger, and at the Emperor’s taunting, summons his weapon in an attempt to strike him down. Vader stops the attack, but Luke’s true emotions have already been revealed. Later, the strongest display of this hatred comes from Vader’s taunts about turning Leia if Luke will not surrender to the Dark Side. This results in the most emotional display yet, culminating in the moment where Luke severs Vader’s mechanical hand and sends his saber falling out of sight. Upon rational realization of what he’s done and how he was hurt the same way before, he chooses to break the vicious cycle in that moment and break out of his emotional spiral. 

Luke’s return to his friends and the heroes of Rebellion after their victory is one of joyous celebration. Handshakes and hugs with Leia, Han, and Wedge eventually brings him to reflection on those Jedi who have passed - Obi Wan, Yoda, and now Anakin - and the realization of what that means for his personal future. 

When Return of the Jedi ends, it is clear to Luke that he feels responsible for restoring the Jedi Order and all that comes with it. This involves not only stepping up to fulfill the galaxy’s idea of what a “Jedi Knight” is, but also establishing and training those who will be the future generations of Jedi. It’s a hefty task, and one that seems quite juxtaposed to the sand rat in A New Hope that just wanted to go to Tosche Station to pick up power converters. But that’s how a literary “call to action” tends to work. 

What is ultimately odd for us as viewers and consumers of this story is that we have not yet seen who Luke is in the time between his confrontation with the Emperor and when Rey finds him in solitude 30 years later. THIRTY YEARS! It only took 22 years for Anakin to be born and later turn to the Dark Side. 30 years is plenty of time for someone’s personality to evolve into something completely new!

Sooooo, coming back around to people’s issues with Luke in The Mandalorian. The main point I’m trying to make is that in our most involved interactions with Luke prior to his appearance on Moff Gideon’s ship - his time during Return of the Jedi - he spends most of it quite devoid of outright warm emotion. He speaks with an undertone that reflects his role as a Jedi, but he hasn’t quite figured out how to blend that timbre seamlessly with his own voice yet. It leads to something that feels somewhat awkward and definitely different, but the reality is that this change is not a “bad” one. Many have stated that Chanel Boots Luke is the Luke that sparked many a feeling in people. This is the Luke that is beginning to understand what his destiny is. It’s the Luke that would choose death over betrayal of the Jedi Order. It’s the Luke that is evolving and changing into what he believes the galaxy needs him to be. 

There is now something around a 5 year gap between Return of the Jedi and when Luke arrives to find Grogu. We saw just how much Luke changed in the time between Cloud City and Jabba’s Palace, so it fully stands to reason that the change would be even more exaggerated over 5 more years of time. 

Also, what DO we know has transpired in these 5 years? We know that Ben was born. 

We are told that Ben’s strong connection to the Force was known even while he was still in the womb. For Luke, the bond that he shares with Leia and Han, one of newfound family and friendship forged through rebellion and victory, is now facing a new challenge stronger and more important than a looming galactic power struggle. Ben’s conception, coupled with the Palpatine/Snoke influence that Luke and Leia both feel, pushes Luke to understand the new struggle they are all facing. Full restoration of the Jedi Order is vital, not only to combat the always growing power of the Dark Side, but because he believes the power in Ben MUST be controlled and used in conjunction with the Light Side of the Force, lest the sins of the galaxy repeat themselves, and a new Vader is truly created. 

So in preparation for building this new Order, Luke fully embodies what he knows to be the role of a Jedi Knight and Master. We as consumers of the story know what this role looked like at the height of the Jedi Order. There was measured stoicism, following of orders above all emotion, and strong emphasis given to letting go of attachments. It stands to reason that this information was continually passed to Luke through his connections with past Jedi such as Yoda and Obi Wan, the same way he gained experiences while training on Dagobah. 

Suddenly, the Luke we saw tear through a battalion of Dark Troopers and calmly state that he is indeed a Jedi seems par for the course. He has been mentally and physically preparing to be what the galaxy needs him to be (and more importantly what Ben needs him to be) for the better part of 5 years. In his mind, and likely the mind of every Jedi he has consulted along the way, the best chance of restoring the Jedi Order to its former glory is through this mystical personification of an ancient religion. The mystery and awe surrounding the Jedi has not been lost from the galaxy in their absence, and it is up to Luke to embody that “god-like savior” that everyone expects him to be. And in that, he is successful - He is the one who saved the galaxy - He becomes a legend. 

From Grogu’s perspective, he likely sees this demeanor of Luke’s as quite familiar. It’s not like Mace Windu was kneeling down at the Jedi Temple giving all the younglings fist bumps and hugs all the time. This stoic and rational mindset is what Grogu probably saw constantly during his young training, and that has a comfort to it, as “cold” as it might seem to us. As Grogu signals to Luke that he is ready to be picked up so their journey can begin, the brief moment they share together feels significant. There now exists a solid tangible connection between the Jedi of the past and the new order Luke is attempting to build, and the amount of knowledge that can now be shared is vast. Luke likely sees in Grogu the ability to find even better ways to bring forth this new Jedi Order, ultimately in service of the entire galaxy. 

It’s difficult to know what happens in the timeline from here. Luke takes Grogu 5 years prior to Ben beginning his training, so we have to accept that some of the timeline doesn’t make total sense. In speaking to Rey during The Last Jedi, Luke states that he took Ben and a dozen other students and “began” a training temple. So either some form of training was already taking place with Grogu for 5 years prior to Ben’s training and it's just sloshed together in flashback context, or Grogu just tagged along for 5 years before official training began. I’m guessing it's somewhat closer to the previous of the two. 

To recap our timelines, we have added two small glimpses of Luke between Return of the Jedi and the sequel trilogy. 

1. The small glimpse with Grogu 5 years after ROTJ 2. The flashback of Ben’s turning 18 years after that

(There are pieces of info from novelizations, but I’m just sticking with visual media right now). 

There is still a LOT we do not know in the gaps, but I think we can make some solid inferences as to the type of demeanor and disposition Luke possessed, and the types of beliefs he held about how to be a Jedi Master. We see in the final and true iteration of “The Fateful Night” flashback that, at Ben’s turning, Luke once again became emotionally overwhelmed at the idea of those who he loved being harmed by the Dark Side of the Force, exactly as he had on the Death Star when Vader threatened to turn Leia. But as Luke states, it was pure instinct - pure emotion - and as soon as he realized what he’d done, looking down at the mechanical hand holding his saber (a deliberate visual flashback by Rian to the cycle-breaking moment in ROTJ) he was filled with shame. But unlike the last time, he does not walk away from this moment a legend, but instead as a failure. A failure to his nephew, and as Ben turns to become Kylo Ren, a failure to the galaxy. 

Ultimately, we know that Ben’s training was unsuccessful at keeping him from the Dark Side, not because Luke was a poor Jedi Master, but because a “Master” wasn’t what Ben truly needed. Instead what he needed was family. He needed love. 

I would like to take a quick detour to speak on those who are very much upset about Din removing his helmet in front of a literal room full of people, one of whom is a complete stranger to him. I fully understand why many are saying he would never do something so expressly against his religious beliefs. And you’re correct. The Din Djarin we have seen for so much of this series is the one who put his religious beliefs above all else, despite comfort, desire, convenience, all of it. But at the end of this chapter of his life, the removal of his helmet to share this moment with Grogu is not about abdication from his religion. Rather, it is about his realization that the connection between himself and this child is more important to him than the religious beliefs he had been following without fault for his entire life. Whether you believe this choice he made was “right” or not, the moment is meant to show that this bounty hunter who never had attachment to anything except those beliefs has now found something even more important to him. He has had a change of priorities and is accepting his attachment to Grogu and validating it. 

“Just for once, let me look on you with my own eyes” In this related moment, Vader pays the ultimate price to see Luke, he pays with his life, and willingly does so. Acceptance that what was so important before (being alive at the expense of being more machine than man) is no longer the most important thing to Anakin, and rather connection and love of those in our lives becomes the real goal and purpose. 

What foreshadowing it might be for Din to set aside his strict religious beliefs and understandings to show just how much he loves and cares for this child. What a lesson that may have struck Luke in his years of solitude that perhaps, if he had just been more like Din Djarin, putting aside old religion in favor of loving and caring for those who are in your life right now, Ben may have never turned. Luke may have never failed. 

So as I ramble on into the abyss, my thoughts are these: The stoic Luke Skywalker in Chanel Boots is not a strange “out-of-left-field” characterization. This is the Luke that the galaxy thought it needed, and exactly who Luke thought he needed to be for the galaxy. This progression falls directly in-line with his self-reflections in The Last Jedi, 30 years after his confrontation with Vader and Palpatine. To those who still struggle to accept Luke’s characterization in solitude on Ahch-To, I’ve got plenty more to say on that, but this has already gone on long enough. If anyone is interested in hearing it, I can certainly expound upon that as well. 

Bottom line: We don’t know what happens next. That’s both the curse and the thrill of a saga that’s being built in 6 different timelines simultaneously. Here’s to the joy of finding out together. 

[twordytings]

Road Trip

Word Count: 849

Going on a road trip with your best friend seemed like an amazing idea... you know, until it wasn’t.

AN~ HEY GUYS! Ok I just wanted to say sorry cuz I’ve been so absent on Tumblr lately, and I honestly have no good reason for it so I’m really sorry. But I’m comin back with a bang so here’s a fill in fic with a character of your choice! The fill in is “your/best friend’s/name” and I made him 18 and a guy, and the reader is about 16 sooooo ya! I hope it turned out well! p.s. Remember to wash ur hands kiddos😘😘

“How many times do I have to say it y/n? We’re not stopping for snacks again!” Earlier during the week, you and your best friend thought it would be a fun idea to go on a road trip together. Him being eighteen, he drove you everywhere. All the time. You never felt the need to get a license since you always had him to drive you places. He could, however, sometimes get a bit fed up with you.

You were four hours into the trip, still having a whopping five hours left, and you couldn’t have been more bored. You and y/bsf/n had already stopped five times solely because you were either bored or hungry. You wanted to take another pit stop, but there was a bit of a roadblock in your plan.

“Why can’t we stop!?”

“Because we’ve already stopped a thousand times for no reason!”

“So?!”

“So I don’t feel like stopping again!”

“But there’s only one more gas station on the road left! After that it’ll just be miles and miles of nothing! Pleeeease!” You whined.

“Well then you’re just gonna have to wait.” He said with a fake smile. You huffed at his blunt response. At this point, you were desperate.

“What if I said I needed to pee huh? I don’t think you’d want me to pee all over your car would you?” In your defense, the entire car ride before this point wasn’t bad at all. You were both singing along to the playlist you had made, and it was fun. Until it got obnoxiously boring. For you, at least. And it was just your luck that y/bsf/n was just as good with comebacks as you were.

“I wouldn’t mind actually. My dog’s peed in here plenty of times.” You grimaced at the thought.

“Eeeeew! Gross!” He chuckled at your reaction. “It’s not funny!”

“It kinda is. Besides, you’re only saying you need to pee so that I’ll stop somewhere. And it’s not happening so stop trying.”

“Y/bsf/n please! This is the last time I promise!”

“No.” You could tell he was getting aggravated with you, but you weren’t gonna give up that easy.

“Please.” You said with a straight face.

“Nope.”

“Please!!”

“Not. Happening.” He was getting angry now.

“Please! Please! Please! Please! Please! Please! Pleeeeease!” By now, you were already in the middle of nowhere, but you really just wanted to annoy y/bsf/n. It’s what he gets for being a jerk. Not like he would agree anyways.

“That’s it!” Y/bsf/n swerved at the side of the desolate road and abruptly stopped the car. You saw him take off his seatbelt and started to walk around the car over to your side.

To give a bit of insight on how your relationship went, it usually starts with you being a pain in the ass, and then him tickling the shit out of you for it. You had a feeling this was one of those times.

As you saw him walking over, you, panicking, tried to unlock your seatbelt. You kept pressing but the stupid thing wouldn’t budge. Perfect. You were pulling and prodding but nothing seemed to work, and in that time y/bsf/n had already opened you door.

“I swear to god if you touch me I will kill you.” You had your hands out in front of you in an attempt to defend yourself.

“Oh now you’re scared? What happened to all the snarky comments earlier huh?” He poked at your stomach. “Sorry but you’re not getting out of this y/n.” And with that he dug into your stomach, a demonic smile plastered onto his face.

“NOHOHOHOHOHOO! AHAHAAHAH!” Your seatbelt was restricting you from moving which added on to your frustration.

“What’s so funny? I don’t remember telling any jokes!” He knew teasing you would make the feeling ten times worse.

He started to tickle your ribs which he knew drove you insane, and you were surprised no one heard how loud you screamed.

“NAHAHAHAH! YOHOHOU AHASSHOHOLE!” He fake gasped at your name calling.

“You really want it that bad don’t you?” If you weren’t being tickled to pieces you would’ve rolled your eyes.

“PLEHEHEHEASE STOP IHIM SOHORREHEHEHHE!”

“Okay fine.” He stopped. “Just one last thing.” Before you could protest he blew a slobbery raspberry into your neck, sending a shriek out of you and a wave of shivers down your spine.

As he walked around the car to get back into his seat, you wiped where he blew his raspberry and let out an exaggerated, “EW! You got your spit all over me!” And wiped it back onto him.

He scoffed and started wriggling his fingers into your armpit. “You want a round two? Huh?”

You were giggling but wouldn’t let him attack you again. “NONONO! IM SORRY!”

“That’s what I thought.” As he closed his door, put his seatbelt on, and started the ignition.

“Whatever.” You said with a pout as you crossed your arms over your chest and sunk into your seat. Y/bsf/n chuckled and started the car to continue the rest of your road trip. You had a feeling it was going to be a long one.

[youwerenevermeanttofeelalone]

Stuck With The Potters | James Sirius Potter

Pairing: James Sirius x Plus Size Reader

Word Count: 1k.

Request: Hello, how are you? I'm so happy that you're writing for plus size readers, because really are little here in tumblr. So, can I ask a James Sirius Potter x reader? The plot can be like James presenting the reader to the family or something like that.. Thank you, have a good night :)

Warnings: Light mentions of fatphobia, a little fluff, family shenanigans (I think? I don't have a big nor functional family so I'm not sure.)

A/N: This is short, but I think it’s not that bad? Let me know!

Gift credit: @obriens

You fiddled with the hem of your blouse for the fifth time in the last ten minutes. Your best friend rolled her eyes from beside you. “You look fine,” they said, not for the first time throughout the train ride.

Your nerves couldn’t be tamed, no matter how many times you repeated to yourself everything would go smoothly, no matter how many times James said everything would be fine.

It had been his idea, for you to meet his parents that summer, and although you were excited you were scared of them not liking you. Your relationship with Lily Luna was good, and even Albus seemed to like you which surprised both James and you— you couldn’t help but be nervous still.

As the train slowed down, you pulled your bottom lip between your teeth, gnawing on it to keep yourself from sighing heavily. Your best friend and you took separate ways, not without you promising to write to them as soon as possible.

James was waiting for you in the station, happy to see you had taken his offer to spend a few days with his family once he spotted your belongings. He kissed you as soon as you were at an arm’s reach, smiling on top of your lips as you parted.

The walk to his house wasn’t long, you held hands the entire stroll as you told him about your past couple of days. He could tell you were nervous which he found adorable and pointless because he was sure his parents would adore you as he did.

He had spoken so much about you that Ginny and Harry had asked him to just take you home already. He thought at first they wanted to discourage him from dating because it has happened to some of his friends, but as he explained that people usually we're judgemental of your body type in general and both shared confused looks he realized their intentions were simply to meet his girlfriend. And honestly? He wanted you to meet them just as badly. That morning he had reminded them of everything you liked and disliked, how you liked your tea and that dish you dispised— he didn't need to tell them to be nice, they were already open and accepting and he had honestly been an idiot for thinking they would make a comment regarding your weight, of course they didn't care about that!

He stopped in front of a door, turning to face you completely. “Are you ready, love?”

You exhaled, nodding whilst looking at him. He gave your hand a reassuring squeeze before dropping it in order to turn the knob. As soon as the door opened, a yell filled your ears.

“You’re sleeping with me!” Lily Luna’s voice was the one to greet you, her bright smile easing your nerves a tad bit.

Said nerves skyrocketed once you were invited to step inside, the redhead woman you’ve heard so much about was smiling at you just as bright as her daughter.

Ginny pulled you into a hug, “we’ve heard so much about you.”

“Likewise, Mrs. Potter,” you politely said as you hugged back.

Shaking hands with Harry was easier than you thought, his green eyes stared at you welcomingly as he asked how you train ride had gone. While you told him about it, Albus came downstairs to greet you, he even offered to help James with your belongings. You could see the surprise in Ginny and Harry’s faces but they didn’t make a single comment.

“Tea?” Ginny offered, smiling when you accepted.

Harry laughed while seeing you place your hands on your lap, sitting on the couch in front of the one you were occupying. “Nervous, (y/n)?”

You felt heat overcome your face, “a little bit, sir.”

“There’s nothing to be nervous about,” he assured you. “We’re happy James found someone to put up with him.”

You couldn’t help but laugh. In all honesty, James wasn’t so bad most of the time— you liked his pranks, how funny he was, how brave and caring.

The progression of the evening proved James to have been right, you didn’t have anything to worry about. Ginny and Harry were very accepting, not once making a comment about your weight or anything even close to that, they were interested in you, your personality, your interests. Talking to them turned as comfortable as doing it with Lily and Albus, you could see why the three Potter-Weasley siblings were so different and at the same time so nice and righteous.

By the end of the day, you were helping in the kitchen while Albus complained about having to do it too and laughing at how much Ginny teased Harry about James having a stable relationship at a younger age than he did.

It felt good, feeling accepted by the family of the guy you were in love with, being included in their jokes and conversations. It felt even natural, sitting down between Lily and James at the table, hearing Al and James have a passionate discussion about Quidditch while Ginny corrected them and Harry looked at them proudly, eating dinner with the people your boyfriend loved so much.

He smiled the brightest he had the entire day, all for you. “I told you sooooo,” he sing-sang just to tease you.

You two were alone for a moment, sat down on the patio steps. The moment would’ve been perfect if he hadn’t opened his mouth, but what was new with James? You rolled your eyes, “you’re mean.”

“I’m not,” he lightly elbowed you on the side. Suddenly James turned serious, “I’m happy you’re here, you know? And that my family loves you as much as I do.”

It was your turn to smile, “I’m happy to be here. And that your family doesn’t hate me.”

He threw his arm around your shoulders, pulling you close. “You’re stuck with The Potters now.”

Kissing his cheek, you hummed. You were fine with it, more than fine, actually.

[atrixfromice]

This might sound like a silly question, but is there something you regret having done on the artistic field?

Oh don't worry, for me there's no silly questions, all questions are great questions and worthy to be answered! And this one is particularly interesting! :D

Frankly, I've always thought I had no regrets on that regard, it's until now I received this question that I started thinking about this XD

...Mmmhh...

In fact, in regards of art I have not much regrets, because all of the tests and good or bad experiences that I've had in the art field have made me flourish and grow up as an artist, and learn a lot of things. They have helped me to become the artist I'm now. And I'm happy and grateful for that.  

I think if I regret about something, I regret more the stuff I didn't do that the stuff I did.

I think I regret of only two things actually.

The first: I regret of not listening my instinct and not having made a contract on my first art job opportunity.

When I was on collegue I met a teacher who worked on the collegue I was studying, who wanted me to illustrate a kids book he was writting. He made me read it, and I liked his story very much, and he seemed to be very nice and

understanding about me doing this for him on my free time cos I had also college classes, so I felt happy and excited to work with him. I should have been mistrustful with him I think. But I think I’d never have been able to predict what was going to happen next...

He said that as he didn't have much money at the moment he couldn'tpay me, but that he was going to "promote me on his social networks" and "give me my payment when the realease of the book could give him earnings"

I actually suspected of that, something deep inside me screamed it was just too good to be true. I rememmber Faik told me "no don't do that! No without a written contract, I feel there's a cat locked up in here" (the equivalent of the phrase "there’s something fishy here" in english) and he was right. Oooh so right!

To make the story short, the end the guy made me work for free off classes on my free time, for 1 month! I made a few illustrations for his work and later, not only he never promoted my artwork on his social networks as he promised. But he finished his book but didn't published it because "at that time he had "no enough money and publishing a book was very expensive" (as he said) so he never payed me any of the work I did!!!

Of course, I was very upset and I insisted him to pay me, but we had no contract, so even if I had tried to sue him, I think it wouldn't have helped. At the end he blocked me from his social networks and since then we never haved talked again.

The second thing I regret:  Is the fact of having spend a lot of time on kid and teen years making art and writting about the physiology and biology of my alien characters, instead of taking care of the other aspects of my story.

Because now I realize that nobody is interested or wants to know about that!

I was a shy girl, a science nerd with no friends who would want to hang out with her because they considered my hobbies and tastes odd or silly. So I spent my years my childhood and my adolescence creating histories and characters in hope to one day publish a succesful graphic novel, comic book or animated cartoon, and like that attracting people who would share my personal tastes and passions and be friends with them.

An that was a good idea in itself, but I think I didn't organize well my priorities.

I was so dumb and naive to think something like that would ever make people feel interested and excited to know about...

I mean, instead of passing most of that time drawing and writting about how the nervous system, the osseous system, the reproductive system, the reproductive organs, the the circulatory system, etc, was going to be. Now I realize I should have spent my time working with the plot, sceneries, places, and spaceships designs, and drawing ALL THAT out.  

Because, let's face it. I think these kind of little details are cool cos they give realism to a sci-fi universe, but is because I'm a dork! LOL

An average person doesn't care how an alien pisses or eats or breaths, or have sex, or how their reproductive organs look like. Or how their brain works.

Average people don't want to know why Faikel's feet can step on water without sinking, or why Nathius can jump up and fall from a 3 meter high without breaking his back.

The majority of people just want action and adventure and cool sceneries and landscapes on their sci-ci movies and shows. And to leave the rest to the imagination.

So yes, I regret a lot about this. I regret deeply.

Specially now I have to redesing Polaris (the spaceship that had no name but now it does), Anthur (the space station where Polaris will land on), Geerox (Faikel's planet) and Patch (Nathius planet) Tuloc (the planet where the other two aliens who are main characters in the crew come from), and The space patrol hidden Headquarters. And I'm spending a bad time with this because the older desings and art concepts I have for them are awfull! They're sooooo awful!!! XD They are from when I was 13 years old and they make me feel embarassed as hell! XD

And that is what I did draw, now imagine  all the other places/sceneries I have to do FROM ZERO because I never put my ideas for them on paper!

So yeah, that's all what I regret of, hehe

I think the lession I learned from this is: 1. To always make acontract when working as a pro artist. Or at least think about it before doing it without contract.

and 2. What people want to see the most on their sci-ci lore and folklore is cool spaceships and sceneries. And the rest they prefer to leave it as a mystery or unknown.

...I just wish someone have warned me about this! XD

[recurring-polynya]

a little in love now and then, part 7/? | ao3 | ff.net |

Summary: Abarai Renji doesn’t have a fortune, but he does appear to be in want of a wife, at least in Lady Kuchiki’s opinion. Fortunately, Lady Kuchiki also  has a sister, and a woefully eligible one, at that. (itty bitty Hisana Lived! AU)

Rating: T, for minor cussing

This time: The Truth Emerges:   Rukia and Hisana come to an understanding. A few understandings.

Older parts: | part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6 |

Rukia studied her own face in the mirror as her maid carefully unpinned her hair. She wondered if she was pretty. People told her she was sometimes. Being pretty wasn’t something she usually cared much about. She had two ice-based sword attacks, a third-rank kidou master certification, and was cleared to use shunpo in combat. She was the Fourth Seat of Squad Thirteen, and ever since she came back to duty, her captain had been making vague little hints about the vice-captain’s examination, something he didn’t do toward Kotetsu or Kotsubaki (both of whom she could beat at arm wrestling).

Anyone who wanted to marry her, she had long assumed, was in it for the surname, first and foremost. And who could blame them?

She was pretty sure Renji wasn’t in it for the surname. She wasn’t sure how she felt about that.

“You have to go, Rukia, they’re your family.”

Rukia chewed the inside of her cheek. She’d grawed over that one for years, like a dog worrying a bone. Why couldn’t he have appealed to her sense of greed? Told her how great the noble life would be, all rich silks and richer food? She could have gone off with a cheeky wink and a mercenary grin. Maybe she could have convinced her family to still let her see him, toss a few favors to someone who had done so much for her in the past. Or maybe she would have just refused altogether, stayed at the Academy, virtuously giving up the fancy life to live according to her own principles. To stay with the only person left of the little family she’d made for herself.

Instead, he had pushed her away, as though the blood that she shared with Hisana had anything on the blood they had spilled for each other, time and again. She loved Hisana now of course, and Touma, and maybe Byakuya, a little, but that was a thing she had decided. A choice she had made-- to give her love to the people who wanted her, instead of the person who didn’t.

But… but maybe she had it all wrong. Maybe Renji had wanted to be the altruistic one, hadn’t wanted to stand in the way of her happiness. Maybe he had just said the first stupid thing that popped into his thick skull. Why had she spent so many years trying to assign meaning to the words of a knuckleheaded boy who used to get stuck trying to jump out of the window of the zanjutsu dojo in his eagerness to catch her attention? More than once, even.

She wondered if he thought she was pretty, either now or back then.

There was a light rap on the door.

Mikan nudged her. “Miss Rukia?”

“Ah, come in?” Rukia called, and Hisana’s face poked into the room. “Oh, hello, Sister.”

“Go have a cup of tea, will you, Mikan?” Hisana dismissed Rukia’s maid. “I want to dote on my sister for a bit.”

“Yes, Lady,” Mikan nodded, setting the last kanzashi on Rukia’s dressing table, and getting up to leave.

“Sooooo,” Hisana drew out, picking up a hairbrush and settling herself behind Rukia. “His manners could use a little work, eh?”

Rukia raised an eyebrow at her sister in the mirror. “Save it for Byakuya. I’m wise to your tricks.”

Hisana grinned mischievously. “So is Byakuya, he just enjoys indulging me.”

“If you believe that, I think he’s finally managed to pull one over on you.”

“Perhaps,” Hisana teased. “But I didn’t come here to talk about Byakuya.”

Rukia set her jaw. Feigning indifference would only play directly into Hisana’s hands. No, directness was her only hope. “He’s not terrible,” she announced. “Abarai, I mean. We both know how terrible Byakuya is.”

Hisana waved a hand dismissively. “Yes, that goes without saying. “Not terrible”? Goodness, I feel like I should order my sister-of-the-bride kimono!”

“Here is my offer,” Rukia plowed on, ignoring this tomfoolery. “I am willing to give Lieutenant Abarai a chance. But in exchange, I need some space. I barely know the man.” She tried to meet her sister’s eyes in the mirror, but Hisana was concentrating on untangling a knot that may or may not have actually existed. “Can you do that? Can you stop throwing lordlings and fancy boys at me for five minutes so I can actually consider one of them?”

Hisana hummed softly. “That seems very reasonable…” she said lightly, and Rukia prepared for the other shoe to drop. “As long as you actually give him a chance, and don’t just use this as a ploy to get me off your back.” Hisana looked up. “You’re very charming, Rukia, when you want to be, and Lieutenant Abarai seems like the sort of upright young gentleman you would rope into helping you pull a grift on your loving sister.”

“Hisana!” Rukia squawked. “He is neither upright, nor a gentleman, and also, I would never pull a grift on you!”

Hisana’s eyes were steely in the mirror. “That’s a rather harsh thing to say about someone you just met. And we both know there’s nothing shameful about an honest, well-executed grift.”

Rukia sighed. Well, she had been looking for an opportunity. It wasn’t a good one, but at least it was an opportunity. “Er, there’s something I’ve been meaning to tell you.”

Hisana cocked an eyebrow. “Has there?”

Rukia picked up one of her kanzashi, adorned with a green and white water lily. She fiddled with it, running her thumb over the smooth enamel. “It wasn’t lying. I don’t know Lieutenant Abarai very well. But, er… this isn’t… exactly… the first time we’ve met.”

“He was involved in your rescue, no? And something about jail?”

Rukia pressed the pads of her finger over the sharp points of the hairpin. “Ye-esss. That’s all true. But also…” She took a deep breath and then forced the words up from her heart and out her mouth at a speed that would have impressed her brother-in-law. “Renji’s from Inuzuri. I knew him there. We came to the Seireitei together, enrolled at the Academy together. I haven’t spoken to him in years. He’s not a stranger, but he might as well be.” There. It was out.

Hisana leaned forward, eyes narrowed. “So, in Inuzuri, would you classify him as just someone you knew, or a friend? Or maybe a… rival?”

Rukia squeezed her eyes shut guiltily. “I may have pulled a grift or two with him!”

Hisana gasped. “Rukia! How could you?”

“I’m sorry, Sister!” Rukia wailed.

“How?” Hisana wailed in return, with the vibrato of a professional actress. “How could my own sister underestimate me like this?” Her face resolved into a deadpan. “Really, Rukia. They do a little profile in the Bulletin whenever someone new makes Captain or Vice-Captain. It listed Renji’s home district-- as if I couldn’t tell he was from the deep South after thirty seconds of talking to him--cripes, that accent is nostalgic. I also happened to notice that he graduated from school the same year you would have. There’s no way you wouldn’t have known him-- you would have met at the Consolidated Shinigami Recruitment Station, if nothing else.”

Rukia hunched with shame.

“I suspected there was something more to it, though-- why else would a young man like that want to work for your brother?”

“The position was open?” Rukia offered hopefully.

“The vice-captaincy of the Thirteenth has been open for years! He didn’t even apply-- presumably he didn’t want to be your commanding officer--”

“I wish you wouldn’t gossip about me with my captain,” Rukia groaned.

“I wasn’t,” Hisana excused. “We were gossiping about Renji. No, Byakuya came home, very pleased about this absolutely excessive job application he had received, the first day the position was open. Mark my words, Renji was waiting for Shirogane to retire. I bet he even hangs out at that awful sunglasses shop.”

“I don’t know why he does anything,” Rukia excused. “I haven’t talked to him in years. Maybe he has a crush on Brother.”

“Byakuya wasn’t the one he couldn’t keep his eyes off at dinner,” Hisana returned pointedly. “That kimono was a good call, no?”

Rukia wanted to shoot off another sharp-tongued retort, but she came up empty. Had Renji really been looking at her during dinner? She had been too grumpy to pay attention. It was highly likely Hisana was imagining things, or at best, exaggerating, but her stomach fluttered at the thought, anyway.

“Childhood friends, I supposed,” Hisana was grumbling. “Academy sweethearts, possibly. But your old grifting partner! I don’t believe this. I don’t believe you.”

“It wasn’t like that,” Rukia excused, knowing full well it had been exactly like that. “He’s the only other person I ever met down there with any decent spiritual pressure. And he’s painfully honest, he wasn’t even a very good con man.” Somehow this lie seemed more disloyal than anything else she had said about Renji. People were always trusting his stupid, honest face. He was creative and charismatic and had an excellent sense of people. He had never once let her down on a job. The only thing that made him a bad con artist was how much he hated doing it.

Hisana’s face had gone still and serious. “You left him. When Byakuya adopted you.”

“We were already drifting apart,” Rukia sniffed. It wasn’t exactly a lie, but it wasn’t enough to cover the larger truth they were both thinking. Of course she had left him. That’s what we do, isn’t it, Sister?

Hisana was brushing Rukia’s hair a bit too roughly, and Rukia let her. She clenched the hairpin in her fist, letting it bite into her palm.

“You’re very lucky,” Hisana finally said, her voice rough. “To get a second chance. Don’t… don’t make too many assumptions about his feelings. People… can be more forgiving than you expect.”

Rukia didn’t loosen her grip on the hairpin. She wanted to absolve her sister, to tell her she had done nothing wrong. But she couldn’t do that without absolving herself in the bargain, and that wasn't something she had any right to do. She didn’t particularly want Renji’s absolution, either, but maybe that’s what it would take to finally prove to Hisana that she really and truly forgave her. “Fine!” she announced, trying to pull the conversation out of this treacherous territory. “What proof do you want that I am honestly and truly entertaining that overgrown doofus as a romantic prospect? Wear his hair ribbon tied around my arm? Buy matching sunglasses? Smooch him in public? I assure you, Byakuya will hate all of those options.”

Hisana straightened, pulling herself back together as well. “Well, you have to stop calling him a doofus, for one.”

“That, I refuse to do.”

Hisana reached around Rukia to place the hairbrush back on the table, and smoothed her hair one last time with her hand. “Maybe you could just tell me how it’s going once in a while. I hear that’s a thing sisters do sometimes.”

Rukia swallowed. “I can do that.”

Hisana smiled, but it didn’t reach her eyes. She leaned forward, and kissed the back of Rukia’s head quickly before rising. “And don’t you worry about Byakuya. I have him under control.”

“Do you, though?” Rukia asked.

Hisana frowned thoughtfully. “Yes. Whatever you decide about Renji, I’ll bring him around.” She frowned. “But, uh, I’ve been playing a little fast and loose with details, so do me a favor, and try to talk to Byakuya about this as little as possible.”

“That,” said Rukia, “is something I can definitely agree to.”

[jess-rewatches-prodigalson]

Episode 14: Eye of the Needle

Here are my time-stamped thoughts. (NOTE: This was written before 1x19 aired)

SPOILERS AHEAD

0:45 - This whole scene is a little weird and a lot upsetting. Why are they talking in common room instead of inside Martin’s cell like usual? Martin looks disgustingly happy and Malcolm looks almost relaxed? The way that they casually discuss murder is upsetting. The ease with which they can both think of ways to kill each other at that moment is upsetting. I hate that Martin pretends he’s a Good Dad who could never hurt Malcolm even though he’s ecstatic at the idea of committing another murder. It breaks my heart that you can see how desperately Malcolm wants to believe Martin would never hurt him and how ashamed and scared Malcolm is when he can easily think of ways to kill Martin. It’s deeply upsetting to watch Martin realize that Malcolm is lying to him. He’s almost proud but also scared at the thought that his son can think of ways to kill him. Also - college!Malcolm is adorable in that shirt but that hair part is still not okay. 

2:30 - This is sweet. Finally. Jessica focusing on Ainsley. Look at how happy Ainsley is to be getting her Mom and brother’s undivided attention and pride. It’s precious. 

2:45 - I love that this implies that Gil and Jessica lost their sh*t on Malcolm after the wedding for skipping his vacation to work. They forced him to go on vacation anyways. I want to see that conversation. I want to see how they finally got Malcolm on a plane. hahaha this is freaking great. AND LOOK HOW MUCH HAPPIER AND CHILL MALCOLM IS RIGHT NOW. <3 That vacation did him good. Fight me. 

2:56 - hahaha Jessica is like “Why the eff did I send you to a tropical resort? You stayed in your room. Alone. Like a hermit. Ugh. I’ve raised a weirdo.” 

3:18 - This is a sweet Jessica/Malcolm moment. You can see how concerned she is about Malcolm and how honest Malcolm is trying to be with her. Even though talking about his father makes that haunted, sad look reenter his eyes. This conversation does have an interesting implication though - I guess no one (*cough* Gil *cough* Malcolm *cough*) told Jessica what happened during the internal affairs interview. You know, when Malcolm admitted that Watkins told him that Martin was going to murder him? 

4:10 - Look at that look Malcolm shoots Jessica when she calls him her “meddling son”. He is mildly amused but he’s also soooo calling her a hypocrite in his head right now. He also looks just a little bit excited that he’s being allowed to come and investigate the girl in the box. This boy missed working.

5:00 - I love this. I love watching Malcolm try to save his mother from some emotional trauma. I love how concerned and just a little scared Malcolm looks. This boy is an A+ son. 

5:38 - hahaha this is great. JT and Gil are so annoyed and concerned that Malcolm’s working again. It’s almost like the team was betting on how long Malcolm’s vacation would last and Dani just won the pot. 

5:44 - Look at the way Gil reaches over and puts his hand on Jessica’s elbow. It’s protective and loving and I’m in love. I’m shipping these two so hard. 

6:00 - hahaha The look that Dani gives Edrisa here. Dani does not have patience for Edrisa’s eccentricities right now. Dani is cold and concerned that a homicide seems to involve the Whitlys - she does not have patience for Edrisa whining about Dani “stealing her thunder.”

6:31- Look at how upset Malcolm becomes when the team starts talking about Martin. He immediately starts spiralling to a bad mental state. He sort of snaps at Dani, which is very uncharacteristic for him. The team sees it too - look at how concerned they are. 

6:45 - hahaha Jessica looks so alarmed at Edrisa’s behaviour toward Malcolm. Another reason to question what’s going on between Gil and Jessica - Gil looks at Jessica and says “You’ll get used to it.” He didn’t need to say that right now but for some reason he felt the need to reassure her and look at how worried Gil is when he looks at Jessica. This man clearly likes her. 

7:30 - Wait. How does ADN already know about the murder at the Carousel? Jessica and Malcolm wouldn’t have called it in. I doubt the police would’ve reported it. I didn’t see any media people at the crime scene. How did the media find out?

8:20 - Damn. Ainsley is in her element her. She’s loving this. I love how she tells them to call Gil. Makes me wonder once again what kind of a relationship they’ve had over the years. 

8:55 - What news station does Ainsley work for? In 1x7 Malcolm refers to New York Direct News. The screen behind Ainsley right now says Direct News Nation. Several times throughout the series, including later this episode, Ainsley’s news network is referred to as American Direct News. So....which is it?

9:34 - “Is this live?” Dang. Every single person in this room is scared and worried right now. I’m living for the whump. 

9:55 - This moment scares me. When Ainsley says “What.” and then stops herself she sounds exactly like Martin when he loses control. I don’t like the parallel.

10:05 - Awww look at Malcolm when he puts his hand on his Mom’s shoulders. He’s so concerned for her. It’s sweet.

10:25 - This scene is amazing. Look at how desperately Gil and Malcolm are trying to comfort Jessica. Look at how scared everyone in the room is. Look at how badly Gil wants to wrap all of his Whitlys in bubblewrap and keep them somewhere safe. He’s done with watching their emotional turmoil. 

10:42 - We got so close to an f-bomb here. Damn it FOX. Although, I will admit listening to Malcolm get indignant at his mother’s swearing is completely brilliant. 

11:00 - Is Martin allowed to do anything he wants...besides leave? Clay time? Consultations? Phone time? TV time? Is he allowed to play internet poker and drink booze too? Like dang. This dude lives better than me. 

11:15 - Again. It’s weird how much Mr. David and Martin seem kind of like friends. They have more than a strictly professional relationship. Makes me wonder how much Mr. David is getting paid - because he looks the other way when Martin does crazy shit very often. 

12:00 - Gil. Is. A. Good. Dad. He sees that the news report is upsetting Malcolm so he mutes it. 

12:41 - Yes. Can we address this? “The chickens are coming home to roost.” WTF? That is crazy person talk. I know what happens in this episode and that line still makes no sense. 

12:50 -  Again. Let’s all admire the progression of JT and Malcolm’s relationship. JT just said “no offence” to Malcolm when discussing his serial killer father’s murder victims. And he meant it. When they first met - JT would not have said that - hell he would’ve probably tried to partially blame Malcolm for the murders. I love this character development. Give JT more screen time. 

13:00 - Do you ever wonder how involved Gil was in the Surgeon case after that first night? He was a beat cop. There were other people investigating the murders. But yet - he interviewed Jessica that night. He knows all about the Surgeon’s victims. Is that because they promoted him to detective and then he took over the Surgeon investigation that night? Or because he learned everything from Malcolm and Jessica? I’m really curious. 

13:50 - This is awesome. I love watching Malcolm be a total big brother. The sibling dynamic is so authentic and I love it. This is a real adult sibling argument. This is exactly what it’s like. 

14:34 - Gil looks pissed. He does not like people messing with his family. JT looks protective. Damn. I love this. 

16:00 - Dang. This Ari guy is great. If only we could all deal with our trauma this maturely. “Leave the past in the past.” 

16:20 - Anxious Malcolm is really cute and Ainsley is not new to his behaviour. Look at her. She knows just what to say to stop him from working himself up with his anxious pacing and racing thoughts. 

16:40 - Malcolm is having none of this. This is an annoyed boy. 

17:05 - Gold star for Dani. This woman is a national treasure. Look at the way she rips into the TV producer. She’s pissed because not only does she think this is morally wrong - she can see how upset it’s making Malcolm. I mean look at him. He looks close to tears. He’s anxious, haunted, and sad. And his hair is falling into his face. You know he’s in a bad mental state when his hair starts falling on his face.

17:36 - OMG. Mr. David is so done with Martin’s drama. 

18:15 - Look at how proud Malcolm is on Ainsley when she calls out Martin for being a narcissist. This boy is mentally falling apart but he still finds it in him to be proud of his baby sister. My heart is so full. 

18:25 - Holy crap. Martin is a very good artist. ALSO the fact that his narcissism is so strong that he is making a bust of himself is just...wow. Yikes. 

19:10 - Sooooo did Martin orchestrate this whole thing? He totally knows what’s going on here. He cut off Ainsley before she had a chance to ask him. PLUS last episode he hinted that Malcolm would kill him. Is he really orchestrating all of this? Like he did in 1x7? Is that why Mr. David looks so done? Does Mr. David know about it? Did Mr. David help Martin? Is that why Mr. David turns a blind eye to so much of the crazy stuff that goes on inside Martin’s cell?!? IS MR. DAVID A BAD GUY?!? IS HE BEING COERCED? OR IS ENDICOTT orchestrating all of this WITH Martin? Or is Martin a pawn in Endicott’s game?!? OMG. This conspiracy spiralled real fast.....also I’m writing this on April 19th so episode 19 hasn’t come out yet. 

20:19 - Damn. Every member of the Whitly family (including Martin) hides their fear with humour. I love it because it’s amusing but also....not super healthy guys. 

20:55 - Again. I don’t like it when Ainsley gets angry. She resembles Martin way too much for comfort. It scares me. 

21:55 - You know, Malcolm and Jessica are really similar sometimes. Look at the way Jessica is desperate to help this case. She gets the same haunted, desperate look in her eyes as Malcolm does when he’s working a case. 

22:46 - I don’t like this. I don’t like this. I don’t like this. Jessica don’t do this. Listen to Malcolm and Gil. Go home. 

23:45 - Poor Jessica looks freaking terrified. She’s a good person. She’s not perfect but her reaction to this case really confirms that she had no idea about Martin. She wouldn’t have stood for it. 

24:45 - Gil to the rescue! <3 Seriously though, this is great. Gil is so concerned about Jessica. They both look scared when they see the body. This case is getting to the both of them. AND check out how they’re interacting. Gil’s arm around Jessica’s shoulders. Jessica putting her head on his shoulder. Ugh. It’s so cute. I ship them....but I will admit. I find it interesting that every time Jessica and Gil have an intimate moment the writers make a point to show us the wedding ring on Gil’s hand that same episode. In this one it happens at about 25:00. 

25:53 - Gil’s little speech here is really sweet. You can see how much he loves these two self-deprecating idiots. He’s rarely that sincere and soft. Look at Malcolm’s eyes though. On one hand he looks concerned about his Mom. On the other hand, he looks embarrassed and a little sad. Is it because he feels like he lets Gil down when he goes rogue on Gil? Or is it because Gil just called him a Whitly? Is Malcolm still technically a Whitly? I mean legally? Did he legally change his name? 

26:20 - So Gil still hasn’t fixed his Le Mans. I kind of love that. I’m sure Malcolm (and Jessica when she found out) tried to pay for the car because they felt guilty about Malcolm breaking it. Gil’s too proud to take their money. Plus - he would rather that Le Mans die than Malcolm. Taking the money would send the wrong message to Malcolm’s fragile sense of self-worth. 

27:00 - Determined Malcolm walking off is attractive. 

27:24 - ...so is Adolpho in on this too? Or did someone break into the car and put Jessica’s purse there?

27:50 - Update: Adolpho is not a part of this craziness. BUT I would like to know more about Adolpho. All of the Whitly employees actually. Why do they work for the family of a serial killer? How much are they getting paid? How long have they worked there? Did they watch Ainsley and Malcolm grow up? 

29:00 - Wishing someone were dead and wanting to murder them are very different. Jessica does not want to kill Martin. She just wants him to leave her babies alone. 

29:23 - sooo anyone else want to know how Martin found out that Malcolm was on vacation? Just me? Ok. 

29:50 - I love how much of a determined badass Malcolm is with Martin right now. Malcolm is pissed and scared and he is not taking any of Martin’s shit right now. 

30:40 - Holy hell. When Jessica walks in Malcolm turns as white as a sheet. Our boy is riding a very extreme emotional rollercoaster right now.

30:50 - Anyone else pissed that Martin calls Jessica “Jessie”? I feel like he’s doing it deliberately to piss her off. I know it’s different on a person by person basis - but my first name is Jessica and I hate it when people call me Jessie unless you are a) my mother or b) my brother. It’s the most intimate of nicknames for Jessica and only really special people in my life get to use it. I don’t give a rats ass if you call me Jess but don’t you dare call me Jessie unless you’re one of my top 5 people on the planet. Somehow I like to think that Jessica Whitly feels the same way as me about being called Jessie. 

31:00 - This whole scene inside the prison cell is a thing of beauty. Look at how scared Malcolm is when Jessica comes in. His voice is wavering, his eyes are wide, and he looks just a little confused. Jessica looks positively determined and fierce but it’s also clear that she’s hiding her fear. Martin is just enjoying the company - as usual - and acting like a giant jerk. 

31:33 - I love the way that Malcolm tells Martin to shut up. You can tell that Malcolm is scared. He’s in profiler mode and he’s worried about his mom. He doesn’t have the patience to deal with Martin’s wiseass remarks. It’s great. 

32:10 - The moment Malcolm realizes that his Mother came to Claremont to kill his father is haunting. He doesn’t look judgmental or angry. Just scared - for her, not Martin. Jessica looks scared too. AND MARTIN - he looks surprised? Is he faking it? Because I’m still standing on the “Martin knew this was going to happen because he was involved in planning it” hill. Check out the look that Martin gives Mr. David in the hallway. Is Mr. David in on this too? Is that why Mr. David is standing further away from the cell than usual? Is that why Mr. David is awkwardly looking at his feet instead of looking forward like usual? 

32:48 - aaannnnd now Martin is egging Jessica on. Yes. He’s definitely in on this. 

34:28 - Is that how Martin got to keep his medical license? He technically never killed a patient on purpose? 

35:00 - I’m loving this side of Malcolm that’s just giving his father all of the attitude. He’s so determined to protect Jessica that he doesn’t bother trying to play his father’s games. He’s just spitting truth bombs and staring at Martin in disgust. I love this. 

 35:05 - I love Jessica’s reaction to Malcolm’s accusation of Martin. I also love that you can see Mr. David look into the room as it happens. He knows something bad is happening in there. He can probably hear the conversation? Those walls can’t be sound proof and we’ve got some angry, loud voices. 

35:45 - This is Martin fulfilling his own prophesy. He doesn’t look sorry that he tried to kill Malcolm (or so he says? who even knows what’s happening anymore?!?) He looks like a dude signing off on his own death. Last episode he said Malcolm would kill him. He looks mildly alarmed when Jessica comes in with the stake. Maybe that part of this craziness hasn’t gone as planned. So, Martin says exactly what he knows will make Malcolm angry enough to take the stake and stab him as opposed to escorting his Mother out of the cell and leaving Martin unharmed. 

36:05 - Jessica’s quiet, angry exclamation about her opinion of Martin is wonderful. It really shows you her character. She’s loud, extreme, and angry relatively often but when she’s beyond furious? She goes quiet. That’s almost scarier. 

36:40 - That head snap. Martin has Malcolm conditioned to follow his command - I’m sure of it. What has Martin made Malcolm do? Why did Martin condition him like this? Look at Jessica’s eyes when Martin says “C’mon boy!” - she looks alarmed - she didn’t know Martin ever spoke to her son this way. Further proof that Jessica Whitly is a good person.

37:23 - Look at how quickly the tables have turned. 5 minutes ago Malcolm was talking Jessica out of murdering Martin. Now Jessica is doing the talking to Malcolm. Look at Malcolm’s eyes. They’re angry, resigned, and sad. They’re not scared. This is terrifying to me. Did Malcolm kill someone as a child because Martin told him to? Well. Malcolm’s mental health is in the toilet now. 

37:42 - Oh. NOW Mr. David comes. Of course. I’m telling you - Mr. David knows things. Bad things. He’s somehow doing Martin’s bidding. Or Endicott’s. This isn’t good. 

38:47 - Hell yes. JT for the win!

38:52 - Dani knows. She just gave Malcolm a look. She’s scared of him. She’s either scared because she knows what Malcolm did or because she knows that his current mental state is not stable. 

39:55 - This scene is heartbreaking. Malcolm is being completely honest and vulnerable about the state of his family’s happiness. He’s projecting his current guilt about Martin onto this guy and the dude is feeding on it. 

40:27 - I love that Malcolm restrains himself really well until the killer mentions his mother. Then he snaps. Look at Gil. Trying to gently get Malcolm to back off. You can see that Gil is crushed. He suspects that Malcolm stabbed Martin and it’s causing Malcolm to unravel. 

40:50 - Dang. JT and Gil are concerned about Malcolm. JT’s actually looking at Malcolm with fear in his eyes. He’s probably never seen Malcolm like this. Gil doesn’t look scared though. Only sad. When has he seen Malcolm like this?

41:00 - “Where does it stop?” - Tom Payne is incredible. The way that line is delivered is heartbreaking and haunting.

42:26 - Gil knows what happened. Or at least - he suspects. He knows Jessica and Malcolm well enough to know how things probably played out. He’s protecting them. Both of them. By pretending he doesn’t know. 

43:00 - Did Malcolm tell Gil the truth here? He looks like he’s going to. Huh. 

What a rollercoaster. Thanks for hanging out fam. 

[writinginstardust]

Drunk In Love

Pairing: Mako x reader

Request: @thats-so-bucky asked “ okay so resending: this was supposed to be the first one sooooo like you got all the promised requests and again, reminder that I really won’t mind if one or two turned a bit or a lot smutty😏👀👀 so the first/last request: drunk/sloppy kiss with ma boi Mako please?? 😍😍 ”

A/N: there’s a version of this that ends in smut but I haven’t quite finished it yet and i wrote this ending in the first place so I’m basically gonna post this fic twice, once with each ending.

Word Count: 837

*

“What a day,” I sighed as I flopped down in my desk chair, bottle in hand, and kicked my feet up on the desk. Mako grunted in response from his own desk. I shook the bottle in his direction. “Care to join me? You look like you need it.”

“Nah, I’ve got a mountain of paperwork to finish.”

“Ah come on, we’re off-duty. Take a break. Relax for once.” He seemed to consider it for a moment before finally wheeling his chair over to me.

“Alright, hit me.”

Half a bottle or so later it was safe to say we were drunk. Slumped in chairs. Giggling over something we’d both already forgotten.

“Did he really try and hit on you while you had him on the ground in handcuffs?”

“Yeah, and all the way back to the station, and through questioning, and while he was taken to a cell. I swear I almost punched him just to get him to shut up.”

“I wouldn’t have blamed you. I don’t think even Beifong would have.”

“Wouldn’t have been so bad if he was cute..”

“Didn’t have you down as the type to date criminals.”

“There’s a lot you don’t know about me pretty boy.” I winked to make sure he knew I was joking and was surprised to find him blush at the action.

“Well,” he leaned forward, smirking, “why don’t you enlighten me.” This was a side to Mako I’d never seen, and quite frankly didn’t realise existed. I kinda liked it. 

“Oh we don’t have nearly enough time to dive into my…eventful past tonight.”

“Come on, tell me a secret." 

"Alright, how’s this? I have a crush on a co-worker who could never love me back.” I shot him a grin and took another swig from the bottle when he looked taken aback.

“Who?" 

"That’s for me to know and you to figure out. Good luck detective.” I winked at him again. Maybe having him as a drinking buddy wasn’t the best idea I’d ever had if I was apparently going to act like this.

“Why do you think they could never love you back?” He asked, more seriously than I’d really expected.

“Oh a few reasons,” I took another drink before passing him the bottle and counting said reasons off on my fingers as I went. “One, his ex’s, I could never compete after them. Two, he is ‘get the fuck out of here’ hot with the most gorgeous eyes I’ve ever seen.” Said eyes narrowed as he tried to puzzle it out. “So, y'know, waaaay out of my league. Three, I work with him like all the time and I know he’ll only ever see me as a friend. Four, I’m pretty sure he’s already basically married to his job. Five, I am the world’s biggest screw up who got captured by Amon’s lackeys and lost my bending. Six, I’m basically useless now because of that and he’s an amazing bender so I don’t deserve him. Seven-”

I didn’t get a chance to finish my list as his lips collided with mine. It was short, messy, and a complete shock. I forgot to kiss him back.

“Did I read that wrong?” He asked when it was over and I’d failed to do anything.

“Nope.” I didn’t hesitate for more than another moment before kissing him again, climbing into his lap with a confidence I’d never usually be able to muster. 

It was as messy and uncoordinated as the first one, the taste of the alcohol thick on his tongue. Even in my drunken state I knew it wasn’t the best kiss in the world but as soon as his hands landed on me it was a thousand times better than any I’d had before. And they weren’t shy. It’s not like mine were either, but it was nice to see and feel the proof that he wanted this as much as me. 

At some point I found myself laid out on my desk, shirt half unbuttoned and Mako’s lips on my skin. Through the haze in my mind one clear thought emerged. We were too drunk to be doing this right now.

“Wait.” He stopped immediately, looking up at me questioningly. I blinked, trying to clear some of the fog from my mind. “Sorry. I just…Maybe we should wait. Try this again when we’re sober and you know this is what you want.”

“I won’t change my mind but we can stop if it makes you feel better.”

“Thanks.” I smiled and leaned up to kiss him again. And he kept kissing me senseless until someone on the night shift came in and kicked us out. 

“You want to get dinner tomorrow?” I asked as we walked down the street to my apartment, arms linked to keep our balance.

“Sure. I’ll pick you up at 8." 

"Sounds great.” I grinned and gave him one final kiss as we reached my door and I stepped into the warm. “Don’t be late pretty boy."