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gold-rhine · 10 months

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Inazuma Rewrite part one

This is bullet points rewrite for Inazuma general plot structure, bc I think it had so much potential, but was horrifically scuffed in game. If I keep something from canon unchanged, I’ll just say so without retelling the entire thing to keep the length down, bc it’s gonna be A LOT already.

Some disclaimers: I’m not trying to fix every single problem, just what I see as major structural failures. I will reference my problems, but you can read my explanations on them more in depth in my “inazuma ranting” tag.

This is also not envisioned as free for all fanfic where I can write whatever I want, but aimed to be actually feasible to see in game, bc it’d be unfair and I want to show that Inazuma could be improved in the same constraints that hoyo writers had. So please don’t ask why I didn’t do wildly inconsistent thing that would be cool, but genshin would never actually do.

I’m aiming to retain all relevant lore and achieve basically same worldstate in the end, including character arcs, for the most part, because I presume them to be integral to the larger strategic plotline of the game. Which means I can’t drastically change characterization and major plot beats like the decrees, rebellion, Raiden has to be a sympathetic ally in the end, etc. I’m also trying to keep genshin’s general tone and modus operandi, bc like, target audience includes 13 yolds and I can’t just “make Inazuma good” by turning it into like, a gruesome and complex power struggle of political factions like Fallout New Vegas.

List of main issues I want to address: pacing in general, rebellion pacing especially, lack of impact and continuity of effects of vision loss on people, lack of setup for the stasis vs transience aka ei vs makoto conflict, character arcs: raiden, ayaka, kazuha, kokomi, yoimiya, kujou sara. And more!

Initially I wanted to make a single post, but it’s already 3k and I’m only up to Raiden’s first duel and I plan to cover post-archon quest content too, like Raiden and Yoi story quests, so I decided to split it up instead of posting like 20k monstrosity. So remember, this is for now mostly a setup.

EDIT: Part 2

Raiden’s motivations\Reasons for vision hunt

Ok, so one of the biggest principal changes is that vision hunt and sakoku decree are active Raiden’s decisions, instead of Fatui’s plot that she’s just passively allowing to happen. Raiden closed the country, but she’s ok with Fatui starting a civil war and selling delusions, bc it doesn’t “affect eternity”, like??? I honestly think that the current plot of her people dying in a civil war meant nothing to her is much worse than her starting vision hunt decree out of misguided plan to ultimately do better for people.

I mean ok, we have to have closed borders to reference Japan’s history, sure, but like, the whole point of isolationist policies like this is to prevent the outsiders’ influence on the country. So she should not be ok with Fatui schemes at any point.

I mean, if it was fallout new vegas AU, I’d keep it to show that dictator doesn’t not care about foreign powers exploiting it’s people as long as it profits the empire and helps to keep people subjugated, but like. Then raiden can’t be uwu waifu. So we gonna give her good intentions and integrity, but misunderstanding of humanity due to closing herself off instead.

Now to why would she close the country and institute sakoku decree. I want to tie this in with another plotline that is just. Kinda floating at sidelines at the moment, but I think could work nicely in tandem. The Scaramouche destroying Raiden Gokaden, the five schools of weapon smithing, which were canonically highly valued by Raiden.

I’m not gonna recount Scara’s entire plotline, but basically he went on a misguided crusade against Raiden Gokaden and managed to cause fall of 4 out of 5 weapon-smith schools.

Game says that he like, tampered with the schools and covertly led to their ruin, which like?? They never found anyone guilty, like the most prized weapon art smiths of your country fall apart and you’re like oh well, I guess Yashiro commission is just bad at it’s job?

There is a plot point in this story where Isshin weapon smiths, unable to replicate a faulty design that was Raiden’s commission tampered by Scara, were scared of Raiden’s wrath and decided to flee to Snezhnaya. I want to change it to be that there is an event, where ALL weapon schools receive same commission at the same time, and Scara tampers with it.

Just as in canon, scared smiths, but now from 4 schools, not one, are manipulated by Fatui to flee to Snezhnaya, But we add a new NPC, the most talented blade smith who had a vision. Fatui frame him as the ring leader, as if they were running not to save their lives because of the tampered design, impossible to fulfil, but that this was a betrayal because of his ambitions.

After this, Raiden has legitimate cause to feel like her eternity is threatened. She sees weapon art schools, one of the most prized country’s traditions being ruined in a moment because of what she thinks is ambitious hubris of one vision holder, who colluded with outsiders. So she closes Inazuma and declares a vision hunt, to prevent this from ever happening again.

But ironically, in truth it was the fault of not just Fatui, but specifically a puppet without a vision that she herself created and failed to supervise. This brings the main idea of the plotline from “Fatui evil, Raiden passive” to “Solipsist goddess who doesn’t understand humanity tries to protect her people by locking them in stasis and taking their ambitions, but the real case of tragedy was her negligence and lack of empathy all along, and this is what needs to be changed.”

Interlude and plot setup

We start with similar plotline. Traveler tries to go to Inazuma, learns that it’s closed, talks to Inazuman NPC to learn more. Here we’re introduced to the general idea that Inazuma was closed off due to one traitor blade smith with a vision who sold off Raiden Gokaden to Fatui.

We go to Beidou’s tournament, which goes basically the same, we meet Kazuha and watch a beautiful cutscene about his dead friend who challenged Raiden to a duel, and now Kazuha tries to find someone who can reignite his vision. I will actually add changes to Kazuha’s storyline, but it be will later.

then we arrive to Inazuma, go through the same bureaucracy loops with Thoma on Ritou, to show the barriers to outsiders and also to illustrate how Thoma is the best fixer when he manages to drop a fee from 1 mil to like 10 gold by promising to have a dinner with government official.

But we’re cutting the second part of Ritou, with the boring plot about like merchant from Mond scamming people with the local police and then Traveler delivering love letter or whatever. I mean, we can keep this as an optional side quest, if like hoyo thinks the lore about love letter is essential for the Ayato’s quest or smth, but not as an Archon quest.

Instead, we put a part of Yoimiya’s quest there. I think Yoi’s quest is relevant enough to stay in the Archon quest, unlike Ayaka’s, but it’s slapped into a place where it ruins pacing. So instead, we’re cutting it up in parts and inserting it into main storyline.

On Ritou, while doing bureaucracy bullshit, we meet Yoimiya, and play the part of her quest about her helping a guy with a vision to escape from his former best friend, who is now a guard hunting him. It helps to show the rift that vision hunt brings not only with the outsiders, but with inside of the country as well.

Ghost of Makoto\Transience setup

another key point that I think is integral to fixing Inazuma is planting seeds for Makoto’s reveal from the start. I really like the Stasis vs Transience conflict from raiden’s second story quest, where raiden believed in eternity as lack of change, a perfect state maintained until the rest of time, while her twin Makoto believed in eternity as never-ending change, where people’s dreams constantly evolve, nature of them chasing these dreams never changes.

but it feels like it came out of nowhere and raiden just speedruns character development in like an hour, so a lot of people ended up feeling like it was just about Raiden mourning her sister, instead of raiden coming to understand makoto’s belief system and through that unlocking makoto’s final connection and then being able to let go.

so we need to first of all, introduce makoto’s ideas of transience from the start, and also empathize the conflict of them with raiden’s stasis.

and it doesn’t mean we’ll spoil the reveal about the second raiden shogun! we don’t have to ever use makoto’s name, just her title as a raiden and sprinkle her ideas throughout the land. We know hoyo area designers can do that stuff really well (guizhong’s relics being scattered all over liyue, rukkhadevata’s shadow in the aranara quest).

like, it’s strange that Makoto primarily ruled and shaped country by herself while Ei was just a warrior, yet we do not have Makoto’s influence visible. We need to add ideas of transience into fundamentals of Inazuma,

“Transience is the dream of the nation of thunder. We find the greatest joys in mortal life in fleeting dreams, for is life itself not like the shadow of the thunder? Pursue your dreams into the clouds if you wish, and enjoy the unexpected silence of the dim lamp-lit nights.” - Guide to Transience talent book.

add these ideas all over the place, esp near sakura. And let’s draw player’s attention a couple of times specifically to the internal contradiction of these ideas of transience being integral to inazuma and raiden’s current hatred of change.

like, we need even 13 yolds and twitch streamers to remember this, so lets make paimon say like

“Huh, this shrine to raiden shogun says that eternity is the pursuit of fleeting dreams, but doesn’t raiden shogun fucking hates dreams?? I wonder, what made her change her mind about them to the total opposite!“

this and more subtle puzzles\locations with focus on transience for people who pay more attention will add the much needed setup for makoto’s reveal

Kamisato siblings

ok, first things first, Ayato being absent without any explanation while his little sister is plotting treason and his malewife Thoma is about to be executed on the streets is unacceptable.

like I know it’s marketing or whatever and he’s not being released but we need his model, hoyo. If we 200% CAN’T have his model, we need to come up with solid excuse why he’s not here. Like idk, he’s helping the war refugees or smth

And we need hints at his presence\influence throughout the story. Like oh, here’s group of refugees who were helped by Yashiro commissioner, they are relocating to new homes, I guess Ayato is really busy. Oh, here is Fatui’s camp where everyone is slaughtered and boba tea cups are littered around, I wonder what is up with that.

and also, Ayaka is organizing resistance behind his back, and we never meet him bc Ayaka actively tries to hide traveler from him.

bc like, Ayaka doesn’t have a development arc in archon quest. She’s just kind of there, being perfect. Like in her story quest that hoyo makes you do at gun point, you like, go on a date, learn that she’s lonely and has trouble connecting with people due to the pressure of having to project an image of perfection and societal distance, do an investigation to uncover her late mother’s fox fursona roleplay diary which she used to cope her with own societal pressure. Which like. Ok, sure, but but this wet socks quest is not an archon quest material. It should be just a normal story quest.

no, Ayaka’s real conflict is wanting to prove herself to her brother, bring real difference to the world. This is her ambition, she literally gained her vision while fighting Ayato in a training, she wanted to show him that she’s strong enough to handle responsibility, he named her Shirasagi Himegimi after she won that fight

but during a civil war, watching people suffer, her role as a cultural figurehead is not enough. She wants to help, but she’s afraid to act, because this will undermine Yashiro Commission and her brother worked so hard to build it back up after Raiden Gokaden fall. so she organizes resistance behind her brother’s back in secret, to help, but without compromising Kamisato name

this basically tracks with what happens in game, but we spell it out and expand on this later.

Getting Traveler to help

next, let’s throw out the weird edging introduction where traveler is not allowed to see Ayaka the first time. like??? bro, we’re friends with 2 archons and heads of their governments, you’re not that important. and it can’t be to protect her identity, bc like. You go to Kamisato estate! You’re told who she is! If you wanted to betray her, that would be enough already.

another awkward thing is that Traveler, who agrees to do every stupid quest they meet, suddenly refuses to help the resistance.

I think we should reframe their convo a little, like Traveler says hey I’d love to help, but my primary goal is to get info about my sibling from an Archon, so I don’t want to go against her.

To which Ayaka says oh, I totally get you, you see, I am myself a culture figurehead and a nominal princess and I can’t speak up against the decree, bc that will hurt Yashiro Commission. But I’m not asking you to fight Raiden Shogun in a duel or smth, I’m just asking you to help people with the resistance, which we do totally in secret. No one will know! Also, how are you going to see Raiden? She’s locked up and doesn’t appear in public. But my big brother is a head of the Commission, if anyone can get you an audience, it’s him. So help me help people and I will ask him to help you see Shogun!

she secretly believes that after traveler sees ppl suffering, they will change their mind and help willingly, same as in canon, but she’s more subtle about it

Rebellion connection

my other problem with vision hunt is that the 3 quests they force you to do about meeting people who lost their visions are like. not good. The concept is interesting, but they are just kinda boring and meandering. They lack dramatic impact. They could do better. So we’re not doing these 3 quests rn, but don’t worry about it, we will get to the effects of vision loss

Instead, ayaka sends us to help Yoimiya and we do the same quest we do in archon quest - help her to free someone from prison dungeon. It goes the same, we get to the dude being mistreated by cops, Kujou Sara steps up and lets us go

But then it’s like, we need to get this dude out of Inazuma city. Cops know he escaped! They will just come for him again! There is only one place that will take him and it’s the watatsumi rebels.

Common complaint about Inazuma is that other countries feel like found families and Inazuma doesn’t, bc characters from resistance and rebellion basically don’t interact, and it’s true. And like, we can get them together! Thoma knows Kazuha, Kazuha knows Gorou, Gorou in canon went to recoinsanse missions to Narukami island.

So, Gorou visits the tea house to pick up the Vision Dude, and the gang has the hotpot meet up. Everyone is there (except Kokomi bc ok hoyo, we’re saving up for dramatic battle reveal, and i think her reveal would fuck up banner schedule). Ayaka, Thoma, Yoimiya, Kazuha, Gorou. and Teppei! Who is here bc he was recruited by Gorou. He’s actually from Narukami island, not Watatsumi, and he had nothing to do with visions, but he’s an idealist, he believes in freedom, so he joined rebellion. fun times are had, Ayaka tries to play srs bsns lady host, but breaks into giggling at The Shenanigans, Gorou is overly polite but adorable and apologizes to Ayaka about The Shenanigans in which everyone but him participates, Yoi is a life of party and the Shenanigans and later has to be bodily stopped by Kazuha from organizing fireworks right here, right now, Thoma and Teppei both get sick from eating Ayaka’s nasty cakes that she threw into soup, bc Thoma is just into oral stuff and Teppei is so earnest and eager to prove himself and impress ppl, haha comic relief, look how sweet and funny this guy is and all characters get along so great with him

bc like, I think Teppei has a problem of a) not having enough screen time b)not having any interesting characterization moments to make him stand out 3)not having other playable and already likeable characters interact with him

so this scene can serve not only to bring that “unlikely bunch of people becoming friends and working together” connection to life, but also to endear Teppei to the players

Vision Loss Effects\ Yoimiya and Thoma

ok, next Ayaka asks Traveler to do that one quest about martial arts master losing their vision. I think it’s the one quest from 3 about vision loss with most drama, but the real reason is that it introduces Yae Miko and we need to do this before leaving for the rebellion. Like, in theory, it could be switched to another, better quest that lets us meet Yae Miko, but honestly, this is not one of Inazuma archon quest problems so I can’t be arsed. Feel free to imagine a cooler intro instead.

when we go back to tea house, we learn that Yoimya’s vision has been taken away. She has been recognized in that last prison raid and the guards came for her later, and she didn’t fight bc there were kids and her old father around.

She’s completely changed. Her innate optimism, her belief in people and their dreams has been drained from her like a sunshine from a dark cellar. But she’s still Yoimiya!! She came here to warn you bc she still cares even if she had her own joy taken from her. She tries to smile and reassure you that it’s ok, she’s fine, but her smile is visibly strained, she’s never had to fake it before so she doesn’t know how. She wears a vision, but it’s a fake one, because her pops said that maybe having it here would help and she agreed, tried to pretend for him that it does help, bu. It very obviously doesn’t.

Ayaka is horrified. She apologizes to Yoimiya, tries to think of ways to help her, but Yoi just laughs humorlessly. “It won’t ever touch you, princess.”

She’s immediately disgusted at herself and apologizes, tries to take it back, this isn’t her, she would never say this, and not to her friend! But also, it’s so hard to care now and she can’t remember why it’s so important to care at all.

Ayaka is shaken. Bc it’s true! She is a privileged noble, vision hunt will not come for her! She is playing at the resistance from the safety of anonymity, while people like Yoimiya actually risk themselves and pay the price!

And this is when the news that Thoma was arrested and about to be 100th vision taken at the feet of the statue comes. Tenryou commission truly strikes back.

Ayaka is in uproar. She’s ready to go herself and fight for Thoma, especially after Yoi’s words. She’s sick and tired of being a perfect princess, she can’t allow any more of her friends, her family come to harm because they don’t have her protection. Clearly Thoma being a theatrical execution is a blow specifically against Yashiro commission and Kamisato family in particular, and if Shogun has beef with her, well, she can settle it with HER instead of going after her friends!

Traveler stops her. This is what they want. If Ayaka openly moves against the Shogun, the entire Yashiro commission falls. Even if Ayaka is in the right! No, it’s the Traveler who will go to save Thoma

But traveler needs raiden’s good will for the info, they can’t confront raiden openly, it was the deal from the start!

But at this point traveler has seen too much, the divide in the country, the change and suffering of their own friends, and they can’t allow all of Yashiro commission take the fall.

This is when the Traveler decides to take a stand.

ACT 2

#rhine talks #inazuma ranting #genshin impact #rhine lore study #rhine writes

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personasintro · 9 months

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I am sad, I am sad because it hurts me to see you having to deal with all of these impatient, ungrateful and entitled people that somehow find/take the time to complain and demand updates but cannot seem to find that time to either write you some words of encouragement or even read your replies to the mountain of other asks where you explain why it’s taking a little longer than usual or what has been going on in your personal life. I wonder if those people even have a sense of reality or understand that there is a life to live outside of these stories because they clearly cannot seem to comprehend that you not only work your ass off and barely have some time for yourself but also already dedicate so much of your time to us.

On top of your personal issues, work and physical health issues, you not only take the time to write as much as you can but also interact with us and talk to us and give us an explanation on why a story is taking longer to update. You give update us on the progress of your writing. Not because you have to but because you want to. Do people not see that?? Do people not see the small things in between that you do for us?? You could easily be a silent writer and not put in the time to have this blog and update us and interact with us. You could go completely off the grid and just update your stories on the platforms you use. But you choose not to, you choose to deal with all of this because somehow you still believe that we are worth that.

You are probably the most selfless person I have come across and I truly admire you. You’re mature and always remain calm, composed and respectful in your answers. You are honest, straightforward and say things as they should be said and stay true to yourself. And I am proud of you.

Lastly, I wanted to ask how your shoulder is doing now? Are you healing well Mimi? I also read that you’ll be going away next week, I hope you have so much fun and you get some time to relax and unwind because you deserve it more than anyone.

Take care of your lovely self and I will always be rooting for you!! 💗🌸

I said this many times before but putting MH on Wattpad was both a blessing and a curse. If someone asked me if I recommended them using Wattpad as a platform for their stories, I’d tell them to think it through. No wonder Wattpad has such an awful reputation of having kids in there. I mean, one look at my message board there and you will understand 💀

If you’re a minor = don’t engage with my stories, don’t interact with me. You will be blocked.

Thank you for this lovely post. It’s been posted a while ago, didn’t really have the time to answer all these kind of messages. Looking back, I do have a wonderful community despite some toxic ppl lurking around here. I know many of you are having my back no matter what. You guys just know & I absolutely appreciate every single one of you, and every word you write and put out to have my back. I know and I see you 💝 you’re a true gift!

Thanks for asking! My shoulder is good now! I do have a fresh scar and it’s healing slowly. Sometimes when it’s too hot it stings and the skin there is sensitive (understandably) but it’s all better now! 🩵

#💜

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vgperson · 1 year

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What Did I Do In 2022?

Game Translations That Aren't YTTD: 1. Okay, maybe 1.5.

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First of all, while I didn't add it until later in the year (not entirely unmotivated by the Stability of Platforms), my site now has an RSS feed for notable updates of any kind! I mention this upfront because I'm mostly just going over the things that are already listed there. It currently retroactively covers everything back to 2020, but I might add more past stuff over time so it can better serve as a general "everything I've ever done" page.

In February, I translated Kenshi Yonezu's POP SONG (and an interview). Noel The Mortal Fate Seasons 1-7 also got a revamped version on consoles (Switch, PS4); the console versions include a new Season 3.5 translated entirely by me, and the rest of the seasons have a revised script which is more thoroughly edited by me than even the redone Steam translation was.

In March, the update adding Kai to Your Time To Shine came out. Yes, he is Kai.

In April, I finally finished up my unofficial Japanese translation patch for Petal Crash. たのしいね、クラッシュ！ It actually just got some extra attention after the Petal Crash run for RTA In Japan about two days ago, which is kind of wild. Is this what it's like to be famous...? (clueless)

In May, I translated Kenshi Yonezu's Shin Ultraman theme song M87 (interview, interview), and the coupling song from the single, ETA. And there was an article about the 10th anniversary of his debut!

Also in May, the Ib remake came out on Steam in English! Told you they'd contact me. It was later announced to be coming to Switch, scheduled for March 2023.

In August, Your Turn To Die was announced to be coming to Steam. It's planned for early 2023, but to be clear, it'll release first in Early Access still with no final part, though with some exclusive mini-episodes and character profile sheets. Apparently once that's out, the actual completion is estimated for 6 to 12 months later... but, you know. Estimates are hard.

In September, I put together a guide for and officially "released" my Custom Translation Engine plugin for RPG Maker MV, the one I made for the Ib remake, and back-implemented into Your Turn To Die shortly after I was contacted about it coming to Steam. It's fancy (in-game language switching!), convenient (minimal direct editing of code!), and you can use it for your own translation projects if you want!

In October... well, I didn't do anything new for it, but I'll take credit for The Witch's House MV coming to consoles. (Switch, PS4, Xbox) I also translated everyone's favorite Chainsaw Man opening KICK BACK, associated interviews, and the single's coupling song Y'all Should Be Ashamed.

Finally, in December, after lots of spending my time elsewhere and indecision about how I should go about returning to doing some dang free game translations, I concluded that what I'd really wanted to do all year was translate Uri's PEDESTAL.

I think some people latched onto specific parts of Uri's original explanation for why it wasn't being translated, such as the cultural aspects (I honestly winced at her blunt remark that the story was "no good at all"), but while Uri indeed had those doubts at the time of release, the only real reason it wasn't translated at the time is that I did a less-than-ideal rushed playthrough that slightly hurt my overall impression of its quality, and I felt too busy at the time to work on something with lots of text that was likely to be divisive. So similarly, me finally feeling up to it was the reason it did get translated. I probably should've come back to it quite a bit sooner (after I was made to give up a certain other translation, say), but as I alluded to in last year's post, I was self-conscious about "my big return to free game translations" being something that might not have wide appeal. Uh, glad to be past that, hopefully.

Oh, and ever since finishing PEDESTAL, I've been working on all sorts of overhauls to my site, but like... not the kind that actually majorly changes any part of the visible design and annoys people (and if something did change in an annoying way, it's probably accidental). Some of it's just better consideration of mobile browsing (stuff like images or tables sticking out of bounds at mobile resolutions), or making things more convenient for myself behind the scenes (did you know I made a program to add "br"s to every line of all lyrics content before considering I could just have the page code do that, and also better?).

Some more major observable changes include general renovations to the lyrics page (bigger font size, buttons that hide individual languages to aid in side-by-side comparison), and more convenient navigation of OSTER's tweets, such that I could actually imagine someone reading through them all the way from the start without it being too much of a hassle.

----

While I'm glad to be over the PEDESTAL hump, I don't... necessarily have any definite plans for upcoming free game translations. I mostly just have some stuff on a list that I may have to make myself check out soon enough. Also, Game Atsumaru (which you may know as The Site That Hosts YTTD's Japanese Version) is ending in June??? So uh, might have to accelerate checking out stuff on there, though I guess it depends on how many creators are able to migrate. (Nankidai does plan to put YTTD's Japanese browser version up somewhere else.)

As I mentioned, Your Turn To Die's Early Access release on Steam should be coming up early next year with those mini-episodes and character profiles, and the game might be completed within the year. No promises. I mean, I don't have anything to promise, it's not my game.

Speaking of my game... also no promises. But I'd really like to release one. We'll see what happens. There's also a different kind of original project I recently returned to trying to make real, which could come early in the year, but who knows. As should be apparent, I'm working on a lot of different fronts here, so I frequently feel bad about neglecting such-and-such type of creative work, which sometimes means nothing actually gets done and released. Ultimately, though, it's probably better to follow what I most feel like doing, rather than force focus on one thing and end up not actually getting much done.

Which is to say: hoping to finish something in the new year!

#vgperson

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demetriandelibinaryboyfriends · 10 months

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@allvalley100

Prompt: Superstition

Pairing: Hawkmetri

The rest of this AV100 prompt that I didn't have time to finish before the prompt closed XD This one is a 7-parter--700 words total! Only fitting they should get a happy ending for the last AV100 post I write for them <3

***

Day 38

Talked to Eli about his…interesting new lady friends. They’re making me miss when he was hung up on Moon, honestly.

Anyways, turns out they’re just some exiled lesbians he took pity on. Families disowned them for kissing women, growing fangs, etc etc. Last I heard, Yas is single—maybe she’d want their numbers?

Woke up with a couple (bite?) sores on my neck, so I asked Eli about his pest control situation. He says everything’s fine, but I have my doubts.

Side note: Are metal allergies possible? Had to toss that silver crucifix—damn thing gave me hives.

Day 40

Confession: I’m worried about Eli.

There was an…incident a few days ago, and I hoped if I mulled it over enough times, it’d start making sense. Wishful thinking.

Was shaving the other morning when Eli barged in. Funny, I didn’t see him coming in my shaving mirror—can those things glitch? Thought that was only Smart Mirrors™️.

He started ranting about how “mirrors are for pussies,” and threw mine out the window??? Incredibly inconsiderate.

He insisted I didn’t need to shave because I’d look hot with a beard. How do you tell if someone’s joke-flirting or actual flirting?

Day 45

Have I mentioned Eli’s weird about blood now? Unsure I like it.

Cut myself on some loose board (this castle needs renovation), and he freaked out. Wouldn’t even look at it! Wailed about “blood being too precious to waste” and ran away. Huh.

Townsperson banged on the door today, telling Eli to stop eating people. I opened to tell him that was nonsense, but I noticed he smelled...appetizing? Like a gyro wrap.

He made himself scarce before I could say anything, but…kind of hurtful, honestly. I know I’m a bit gangly, but I’m not that ugly, am I?

Day 47

Finally got a wifi signal in here! Only took 4 hours of fiddling to make Eli’s TV work.

We binged Castlevania today. Eli’s favorite character is Dracula, supposedly because he’s “such a badass and is gonna kick the asses of every one of those lame humans.” I think it has more to do with Dracula having a soft spot for a smart, good-hearted human who he goes absolutely batshit avenging, but Eli’d never admit to this.

Side note: Is it hypothetically possible for one’s reflection to gradually grow more and more translucent and dead-looking? Asking for a friend.

Day 50

Bad news: Eli ate the mailman today, and I…may have helped.

Walked in on him draining the guy’s blood, and naturally demanded an explanation. Eli said to settle down because “there’s plenty to share!” What an insane suggestion.

But since the mailman was already dead...

In my defense…best AB positive I’ve ever had. Not that I’ve had much. I’ve dabbled a couple times, but who hasn’t?

In better news: Wearing the “amnesia” down! We’ve been reading through the library together, and Eli’s instinctively remembering what kinds of fantasy and sci-fi I like. He remembers me—I FEEL it.

Day 60

Okay! Know what’s going on now.

We were reading Buffy comics when Eli clutched his head and started shrieking. Everything came back at once.

After I calmed him down, he spilled everything. Getting involved with a Kung-Fu-practicing vampiric “organization” promising nigh-unlimited badassery. Being taken to Europe, undeadified, and given a blood-only diet…none of which sharpened his memory.

Admitted I’m not inheriting a Greek estate, and I only came to find him. He tearfully told me that’s a shame. He imagined us building a life there. Maybe raising some goats?

Fuck it—if he wants, I’ll make that happen.

Day 140

Been a while! Busy, busy!

Surprisingly easy talking “distant family members” into giving us a land plot. Maybe it’s superstition. Maybe it’s healthy fear. Regardless, people don’t like saying no to weird, sharp-toothed out-of-towners.

Made Eli promise he’ll discuss with me before joining any new martial arts-related cults (especially ones that strand him in isolated castles as soon as he “isn’t evil enough”). Now he only feeds every so often! We’ve gone through some neighbors, but it’s an improvement over Transylvania.

Also, our eldest nannygoat gave birth! Eli named the kids Hellraiser, Slayer, and Wrathchild. I love them.

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midsummer-afternoon · 1 year

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꧁Kyosuke Higuchi Analysis꧂

This is an analysis about Kyosuke Higuchi, the 3rd Kira we are introduced to in the Death Note series. I’d like to make it clear from the start that this is not a post to condemn him or justify his actions—the main idea is to better understand his motives and who he is as a person by analyzing the things he says and does. Understanding Higuchi provides striking insight into other characters and the story as a whole.

‧̍̊·̊‧̥°̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥‧̥·̊‧̍̊ ♡ °̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥ ·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙·̩̩̥͙*̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ °̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥ ♡ ‧̍̊·̊‧̥°̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥‧̥·̊‧̍̊‧̍̊·̊‧̥°̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥‧̥·̊‧̍̊ ♡ °̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥ ·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙·̩̩̥͙*̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ °̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥ ♡ ‧̍̊·̊‧̥°̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥‧̥·̊‧̍̊‧̍̊·̊‧̥°̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥‧̥·̊‧

Okay, I should mention from the start that I will not be analyzing every single scene Higuchi is in, that will be too time-consuming and not really necessary. Instead, I've handpicked the ones I believe are most important to offer perception into who he is. The majority of this analysis will focus on the manga, because the anime does not cover as much detail about Yotsuba and some outside sources.

Higuchi makes his debut in Volume 5, Chapter 36. His features were probably obscured because we're not supposed to know which one of the Yostuba men were Kira yet. But can we just appreciate how funny (in an inappropriate way) this looks?? He's literally got the classic bad guy appearance being this figure in a dark room doing evil deeds. Also, I apologize that the manga caps have to be in Japanese, it's the only version available to me at this moment. However, I will provide translations and explanations.

So, just to summarize what's going on in the first two scenes, it's when Rem approached Higuchi. He's seems to be asking Rem to be precise that he can freely use the death note as long as he kills the criminals broadcasted on tv and she agrees. In the second cap, Higuchi says something along the lines of "This is a good trading business for both Rem and me."

From these first two scenes, we know Rem chose Higuchi to be the person to continue the Kira killings and use the death note selfishly as Light requested. We see Higuchi performs these killings without second thought or remorse, in fact, he's quite content with the circumstances going as far as to call this a "good trading business." We understand from the Yotsuba arc as a whole that Higuchi did not only target criminals but important figures in the business world for personal advantages. We can pick up from this that Higuchi is cruel, greedy, and has little to no respect for human life. He values attaining wealth and power to the extent he doesn't mind killing people who have done him no wrong. We get further insight to his motivations through things Light, Namikawa, and Mido will say, but more information on that later.

I'd like to bring up Halle Lidner here because during the time Higuchi takes over as Kira, he kills Halle's friend which eventually leads to her joining the SPK. This gives us some potential clues about Halle as a person too...Was Halle's friend an important figure in the business world? Was he or she Japanese because Higuchi's in Japan and the majority of his victims probably were? Personally, I believe Halle has connections to Japan. This could explain why Halle understands the language and seems to function well as Kiyomi's bodyguard. This allows us to come up with our own interpretations for her past that are not without basis. Alright, back to Higuchi.

The next scenes I've included are one of Yotsuba's meetings where the men speculate one of them must be Kira or have a connection to Kira because last week and the week before that, the murders decided in the meetings came true. Takahashi questions why did Kira start taking on murders like this instead of just judging bad guys? And we see here, Higuchi essentially tells him that Kira's doing this because it benefits Kira and calls Takahashi a fool. With this little scene we can pick up that Higuchi has no problem with being rude to people but this is perhaps one of his lesser bad qualities when you consider this is a man who kills for benefits and without remorse. Another factor to keep in mind is in a future scene Mido explains that Higuchi only forced Takahashi to join the Meetings of Death because he was considered less sophisticated than Higuchi and Higuchi needs someone like that to make himself look and feel better. So, it's fair to say Higuchi's an insecure person.

Here are some screenshots I took of Higuchi's page on the English Death Note Wiki. We're given a little background info about him which I'm going to try to use to gain better understanding about his history. My initial thought before I checked this was that Higuchi rose to a high position within Yostuba through underhanded tactics and/or he happened to have a connection. We get to see here that Higuchi does in fact have a connection through his father who's the president of Yotsuba Heavy Industrial. It seems Higuchi was probably able to become the Head of Technology Development through this connection and his abilities, I guess. Despite we know that Higuchi tends to be considered one of the less intelligent and less capable folk, he can't be completely incapable in the brains department since he does have 6/10 in his Knowledge Stats.

Now I want to talk a little bit about this scene, when Hatori fearing the potential reality of ending up in jail says he wants out of the meetings, to this, Higuchi assures Hatori he'll be dead by tomorrow with a creepy smile on his face. Let's face it, the other Yotsuba men probably figured out Higuchi was Kira right here, because he's able to say this with such confidence. This scene reiterates Higuchi's cruelty and lack of respect for human life.

So, this is at scene when Namikawa makes the point about how Kira desires status to which Higuchi claims that's 「くだらねー」 which translates to "crap" in Google Translate but in this context, it probably means something along the lines of "how stupid/dumb." This is important because Mido does make a point about this later...which you will find out when we get there. 😁

And now we have a scene with Shingo Mido's look alike Light Yagami (or is it the other way around? I mean, Mido is older than Light, but Light is the MC of this story...) Sorry for the lame joke lol. But anyways, I want to show these two manga caps where Light notices the difference between the Kira killings from before and after he was confined. When Light was Kira, Kira did not kill criminals who had no intention of killing, those who accidentally killed someone and those who had room for extenuating circumstances. To put it simply, Higuchi kills criminals without taking into account if the criminal really deserves to be punished...I hope I explained that well?

Next, I want to discuss the episode where Misa goes on a date with Higuchi to trick him into revealing he's Kira to help Light return to power. At first, I will admit, I thought Higuchi's actions didn't make too much sense and it was a plot device for the most part. But looking at this from the perspective of somebody who's not supposed to be one of the great brains of the series and taking into account having the death note made Higuchi blinded by power it's more believable that he would start to get careless and make mistakes like this. Also, it has to be kept in mind Higuchi has no idea Misa's in love with somebody else and he probably thought Misa might marry him to be something like an arm trophy wife. Something else I would like to point out is how this scene was slightly altered in the anime. In the manga, we just have Higuchi getting into Misa's face at his most aggressive, whereas in the anime, Higuchi physically took her down and towered over. It almost looks like he is about to r*pe her, thankfully, he does not. But I think it is quite a significant difference, perhaps he's even more of an aggressive pervert in the anime than he was in the manga. Personally, I don't like this change because if Higuchi was not depicted in the style of an almost potential rapist in the manga that should not be so in the anime as well.

Here's another scene we're shown how the Yostuba men in particular Mido and Namikawa (though it's probably reasonable to say Shimura as well) have figured out Kira is Higuchi. In this scene, Mido, Light Yagami's Yostuba counterpart, makes a point about how Higuchi needed Takahashi to make himself look better and of the group Higuchi is the one most obsessed with status. The way he talks about how status doesn't matter to him shows how much the opposite is the truth. Namikawa goes on to talk about how Higuchi makes fun of people but can't use them well and it's caused him to be demoted in the past. Now, one could dismiss these comments as Higuchi's colleagues badmouthing him because they dislike him but I'm inclined to believe this is all true because Higuchi's actions have proven all of this. It also brings us back to the point that Higuchi is not one of the more capable characters in this series.

This is another scene that proves Higuchi's lust for power and status. He's gleefully declaring that he now has the Shinigami eyes because he has stopped the Kira killings for 3 days like Misa requested so that she will marry him. He goes on to say he's going to tell the president (of the company) let's just say "CEO" because I'm about 99% sure this is what he means, that he is Kira, he's going to first get a promotion, then someday become the CEO himself and then those six will be...And then he gets cut off because he gets that call from Namikawa to turn on Sakura TV and the demise of Higuchi begins. Before we move on to the next part, in this scene we learn the more specifics of Higuchi’s motivations all along, he wants to become the CEO of Yotsuba and there’s nothing he wouldn’t do to achieve this goal, especially since he was given something as powerful as the death note.

I've fast forwarded to this scene when Higuchi finally makes the Shinigami eye deal with Rem. So we've known this whole time he didn't have the Shinigami eyes which is a lot of the reason he wanted Misa (whom he believed had the eyes at the time) to be his wife. Higuchi didn't want to cut half of his remaining life span for them, and well, it's easy to understand why it's a heavy price to pay. But I guess from this scene itself we learn that if he is pushed far enough between looking at a life in prison and/or death penalty or living a shorter financially prosperous life, he chooses the latter and decides the deal is finally worth it.

I will fast forward once more, to the part here when Higuchi, in a final act of desperation takes himself hostage. We could use this scene as proof of how dumb Higuchi is, but I personally do not think taking this action when under extremely stressful circumstances is unrealistic. People under extreme pressure could do things that could look ridiculous to those who aren't. Even Higuchi in this last panel acknowledges this, declaring that his life is over.

We know after this Watari shoots the gun out of Higuchi's hand and Soichiro and Mogi arrest him.

And then Light got his death note back, regained his memories, and killed off Higuchi.

However, this analysis is not done just yet, you see I would like to now take this opportunity to talk about how in the Death Note films, Higuchi and Kiyomi's characters were combined. And this might be looking too deep into it, but I doubt the choice was completely random because instead of using Higuchi or Kiyomi, they could have just added a new character. I believe this was done because the movie makers (either consciously or subconsciously) might’ve noticed Higuchi and Kiyomi share certain traits in common. They’re both highly jealous people who lust after power. They’re both obsessed with having others envy and admire them, but try to conceal this fact due to their pride. However, I will say I think Kiyomi is not as morally depraved as Higuchi, has a little more respect for human life than he does, and is more intelligent/capable but that’s beside the point.

Furthermore, in my opinion the film creators did a great job with this because they did not simply swap Kiyomi with Higuchi, but rewrote Kiyomi to be a more intriguing villain—that and Nana Katase is a great actress. Kiyomi was different from Higuchi in how she was able to make decisions and take actions on her own when she became Kira. If you haven’t watched the films, I want to encourage you to do so. The female characters are handled much better and Kiyomi easily became my second favorite female character in the movies.

To conclude, I intended to offer some insights into Higuchi's motivations and character while also making a point about how understanding him helps us better understand seemingly unrelated characters like Halle and Kiyomi. There's always so much more that goes on beneath the surface, that ignoring side characters can cause a person to miss out. Higuchi is, to put it simply, greedy, insecure, and has little to no morals whatsoever. He shows us this in how he would kill innocent people to criminals who don’t deserve the death sentence, use Takahashi to try to make himself look better, and would try to take over a company through murder and threats. Higuchi is an excellent example of how power in the wrong hands can blind someone and the chaos they can create due to low moral character. And I’m not exaggerating Higuchi’s actions ruined Yotsuba and took the lives of many innocent businessmen and women. l think Higuchi is interesting, and I can fully appreciate him as a fictional villain. Higuchi is my second favorite Kira, when I say this, please don't misunderstand this as I like him as a person standing in the same room with me or wish for him to be my friend…I bet however, nobody can ever guess who my No. 1 favorite Kira is. 😆 Anyways, thank you so much for reading this post. I sincerely hope it was worth your time. Have a great day/night. 😊💖

#death note #meta #opinion post #analysis post #kyosuke higuchi #light yagami #reiji namikawa #shingo mido #misa amane #kiyomi takada #halle lidner #death note films #sakura babbles #🌸🌸🌸#♡♡♡

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hawkinsindiana · 1 year

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an update

hi everyone. i’ve been a bit more inactive on here than usual and haven’t posted a new chapter in a bit over a month, and while i don’t really owe anyone an explanation, i feel it’s important to share. i want to share. stories and perspective have weight, and i know i’m not alone in this.

when it came to writing, the grip that validation, praise, or notes had on my motivation and creativity took over. i think i sort of lost sight of the fact that writing is supposed to be for me and i just so happen to post it online for others, not the other way around. i started worrying too much about whether or not it would be enjoyed by readers and less about the cool part, which is me coming up with plot and characterization and whatnot. writing became more of a ‘task’ and less of a hobby. the fun was stripped from it and i’m not super proud to admit that. in all honesty, it forced me into another bout of depression, worrying endlessly why writing hasn’t been coming to me as easily as before, why my favorite hobby seems to have slipped from me. it’s been incredibly painful.

it also wouldn’t take a rocket scientist to see that interaction from readers has sharply declined. to be simultaneously writing some of the work i’m most fond of and seeing the notes barely pass a hundred or not even reach that is incredibly draining. i know i’m not the only creator or writer with this issue and it has real effects. my drop in motivation combined with this was a perfect storm for me.

all of that being said, i think i’m finally starting to get back into the hang of things. i’ve been able to write small bits of the next chapter; while it might not be at the pace i wish, it’s better than it was before. i’ll take it. hopefully, i’d like to have it out by the new year, but no promises. one of the things i’m actually proud of has been my dedication to this single story and how i’ve been fairly consistently writing for over three years now. so i’m definitely not giving up, and i’m not gonna let this site put out my fire. part four will be finished; i don’t think i can live with myself if i don’t see it through. i pray the urge to write for s5 stays throughout the hiatus.

again, i probably didn’t need to say all this, but i wanted to. it’s important to be honest, especially about mental health. hopefully the next post from me will be a chapter (fingers crossed!). those of you that do continue to write comments and asks and reblog my work, i love you very much. going back and reading each of your thoughts has kept me going through this. ily ily <3

#and ms ruby ofc cannot forget her #her kind pushes to keep going have been immensely helpful #i hope you know just how dear you are to me <3 #kenny screams!

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thrill-seeker-if · 1 year

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I posted 1,090 times in 2022

775 posts created (71%)

315 posts reblogged (29%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@thrill-seeker-if

@manonamora-if

@king-of-autumn

@hauntthebodies

@narrativefoiltrope

I tagged 919 of my posts in 2022

Only 16% of my posts had no tags

#not if related - 424 posts

#thrill seeker if - 133 posts

#ro asks - 101 posts

#ch: n - 96 posts

#ch: oli - 90 posts

#anon - 84 posts

#ch: hannie - 83 posts

#ask aalaa - 74 posts

#lovely anon <3 - 45 posts

#<3 - 42 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#we were like reviewing our tor as we go into another work year and she had been showing our plan for the next year and as we're talking she

My Top Posts in 2022:

Please don't write another IF. You're already lazy enough writing this one.

I don't really know what to say to this one. But, then again, I don't really owe you any sort of explanation. You have no idea who I am or what I've been through these last few months, so I really don't know where you get off of that you can speak to me so harshly.

I have very little time to myself, and I am making this IF for free. Between this, I've been helping my Ukranian family seek refuge here. I am paying for their stay. I'm working and studying, too. I get very little free time for this IF. I understand if you don't want to read it, or any of my other WIPs, but I don't think you have the right to talk to anyone this way regardless. I do not owe my time to you. I am not your personal content machine.

If you think you can do better, I truly encourage you to try. Maybe you can take this stick out of your ass while you're at it.

71 notes - Posted April 18, 2022

I’ve collaborated with the incredible @aikhako again for N’s birthday celebration! They've, of course, blown it out of the water yet again!

One thing I'm excited to announce for this celebration as well... I have finally moved the demo from inkle to twine! I have edited chapter 1, so it should hopefully flow better now!

You can play the game from this link. Hope you guys are having a great day!

Also, make sure to check out Aikhako on insta, they post more often there!

75 notes - Posted April 12, 2022

this is so funny to me.... i love blade so much but he really went out and spoke about their trauma and was like 'and i.... yeah me too i guess!'

91 notes - Posted November 10, 2022

5000 views and 2500 plays celebration!

Hello everyone! I actually can't believe it, but today, we passed 5000 views and 2500 browser plays for Thrill Seeker!!

First of all: thank you guys so much. I literally wouldn't be here without you guys. The support I've gotten from you amazing folks is staggering. I really want to thank ALL of you for supporting Thrill Seeker, you guys are so lovely and to be honest, the love I've gotten here has gotten me through some really tough times. The friends I've made here are absolutely wonderful.

I love talking to you guys, seeing your art and hearing your theories, and I love hearing what you look forward to. Thank you for listening to my ramblings and being so lovely!! I'm so happy to have people like you engaging with Thrill Seeker and I appreciate every single one of you.

So, to thank you all, we're going to have a little celebration!!

Until then I’d just like to do something fun for you all! Ther are three There will be three prizes for everyone who wishes to participate

1st prize: Portrait of your MC and preferred RO & Longer Drabble created with your preferred RO

2nd prize: Medium length drabble written with your character & smaller portrait of your preferred RO

3rd prize: Option to create your own character who, although small, will play a role giving information to the MC & moodboard of preferred character

To win, all you have to do is reblog or comment on this post (not like!!) and you'll be in!!! This will be open to anyone until about mid September, so you all have plenty of time!

I hope you guys enjoy!! Thank you guys so, so much for sticking with me and giving so much love to Thrill Seeker!

See the full post

93 notes - Posted July 26, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Your favorite IFs? I don't remember if you have already answered something like this and I'm looking for something to get addicted to.

I've actually been looking for the post I made about this exactly, but here's a bunch more!

@reincarnation-if - A RESURRECTION STORY, BABY!!! I love the author AND the story, I'm totally obsessed with it!! The demo isn't out yet, but I literally can't wait!!

@manonamora-if - I cannot recommend this author enough. Check out her IFs here. I don't even know how to begin describing how amazing she is-- it seems like she can literally do any genre!

@attollogame - I'm sure everyone knows this incredible if but, if you don't, definitely check them out RIGHT NOW! They're going to celebrate their two year anniversary soon, so this is the perfect chance to read the work and find out more about this awesome game!!

@jaunefleurwrites - another one I mention a lot. But she has so many amazing WIPS and IFs and I'm not sure if all my audience knows about it!! You can check Jaune's masterpost for all their amazing IFs (my favorite is definitely A World Without You!! There's just a certain warmth in Jaune's writing that I absolutely love!)

@magiciansvoyage - Yet again someone who shows up on the blog a lot-- I'm getting my favoritism out of the way, don't worry. Arlo is such a lovely writer and person, and Magician's Voyage is easily one of my favorite ifs. Arlo's writing is so immersive and I love fantasy, so easy rec from me!

@parkerlyn - The Nameless is literally one of the best IFs out there and you are missing out if you're not reading it. They are also celebrating their second anniversary soon so send them some love!!

@anathemafiction - If you're looking to buy an amazing, immersive game, this is the one to get! It's fully released, incredible quality, and you can download it on mobile or desktop. I would definitely recommend checking them out!

@thefallendivine - I love betrayal stories. You play as the heir to heaven and hell, but your family has been killed by your peers. You're in a situation where you're not sure who to trust anymore. I absolutely love these kinds of stories!! I think if you like Thrill Seeker, you'll enjoy this is!

@sevensdeadly-if - You get to interact and romance the seven deadly sins. How much better can it get, man??? Is there anything more I need to say to sell it?? Chapter one was released recently, so an excellent time to read it.

@nextinline-if - Are you looking for an if with DRAMA?? ROYALTY?? A STORY THAT MAKES YOU LOOK WITHIN YOURSELF, THAT MAKES YOU WANT TO BE A GOOD RULER??? then look no further than this amazing game!! Constantine has my heart and I will love him till the end of time, so if you do play, pick someone else, because he is MINE!

@lifesupreme-if - There are defiitely not enough sci-fi if's out there, and this story is based in the world of Cyberpunk 2077, so it was an automatic win in my eyes.

@when-life-gives-you-lemonssss - This is nothing like Thrill Seeker, and I love it. It's a cute slice of life with a bunch of awesome ROs. I love domestic games, and this covers all the boxes in the cute game checklist!

@whenbodiescollide - when i saw the synopsis, it immediately caught my attention. the entire aesthetic of the blog plays in so well with the story that i can't recommend it enough!!

@vendetta-if - another awesome synopsis bro. I love revenge stories, and this is probably the best IF you're gonna find of it, baby!

@lacewing-if - Their if doesn't have a demo yet, but I already love the premise. Keith has my entire heart and I can't wait until I can get to romance him properly LIUHDFSSDFHUI

@thehunt-if - Another concept I love a lot-- you play as a hunter for supernatural beings!! But then!!! YOU GET POSSESSED BY SOMETHING YOU HUNTED, AND NOW YOU HAVE TO WALK A MILE IN THEIR SHOES!! i cannot stress how much I love this hehe

@hummingbird-games - Moreso a VN, but still such a cute game and I just love it sm!!! The art is so gorgeous and it's just so nicely done!!

@if-whenthesunrises & @if-mirrormine - both are excellent stories!! The lovely author is on a hiatus right now, but I would still recommend checking out their work!!

@unwilling-souls-if - The premise is just so insanely good I can't even explain it. Check it out and you'll get it, LMAIUHDSFUHDFIU. Xander-- watch out. I'm coming for you.

There are way too many talented authors to mention in the word limit, so let me know if you want a part three!! Thank you for the ask Eva <3

339 notes - Posted August 23, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

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biolizardboils · 2 years

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Crumpled Up Pages: Old Captain Underpants WIPs #5-9

🎵So they’re FINALLY HERE, performing for YOU🎵—

It’s been a while, huh? I won’t waste as much space above the readmore this time. All the ground rules from the first post still apply, so go read them again if you need to—I know I did!

Again, most of these WIPs deal with the twelfth and final book in some way. If you haven’t read it, this post won’t make a single lick of sense. Any summarizing I do will be very sparse, cus this thing’s already super long. Seriously, just go read it (and the rest of the series, too)!

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So how about that Book 12, huh? In many ways, it’s a fitting finale for the whole series. It talks more explicitly about ADHD than ever, gives a glimpse of George and Harold’s future, segues into Dog Man, and doesn’t end with the usual “here we go again”. Not to mention, after years as just a running gag, the villain is the gym teacher.

Like, yeah, it’s pretty decidedly the final book. And it seems the general consensus is that it satisfies that role in all aspects… except for one.

George and Harold get a happy ending—two, in fact—but a certain superhero does not. In fact, he barely gets an ending at all.

Now, he was never truly the series’ main character, and the book gets very busy tackling a more serious subject. With those facts in mind, such an oversight is forgivable. Personally, I can forgive it. But that doesn’t mean it didn’t hurt like hell to see.

The book just… declares him “dead” posthumously. It’s just... you know what, screw the formalities: I adore the Captain and I miss him and I wish he'd had a better sendoff.

I’d been warned, but reading Book 12 was still very bittersweet for me. In mid-to-late 2017, when I wanted to get at least one fanfic out, I wrote down some ideas to express that pain. Casual cruelty to neurodivergent kids was a daunting subject, so I mostly focused on the Captain’s “death”. I started thinking: how could I make his last moments more meaningful without contradicting canon, or downplaying what makes the rest of the book so important?

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WIP #5: Sendoff (aka Chapter 33 1/2)

Soon they knew everything, from the chemical makeup of their arch-enemy to the events that lead to the destruction of Smart Earth... to the presence of one more consciousness among their combined particles. [Book!Verse, Book 12. CW: Major character death.]

This was by far the hardest WIP to summarize. I remember how it goes pretty well, but its concept is really tough to put into words… which, uh, might explain why I gave up on it 5 years ago. Welp, here goes nothing.

So after showing that snapping doesn’t affect Krupp anymore, the book offers two explanations: “Perhaps it was the electromagnetic pulse [when Sir Stinks-A-Lot blew up] that erased the hypnotic spell from Mr. Krupp's brain. Or maybe it happened during the Super-Power-Juice-ectomy.” This fic runs with the second option: basically when Sir Stinks-A-Lot absorbed Captain’s powers from Krupp’s body, he absorbed Captain himself as well.

After sending their distress signal, Old!George and Harold realize he’s there and talk with him telepathically. (I noted here that George should mostly use words, and Harold mostly pictures. Captain would’ve used both, crudely at first, but improving as the conversation went on.)

The following exchange of thoughts took place for only a millisecond. For its participants, however, it was as if time itself had stopped so they could speak once more.

[...] He knew they were adults, and yet they appeared in his mind’s eye as the children he’d come to know.

The dialogue would’ve opened with Captain feeling very conflicted. Since Stinks-A-Lot and the Old!Boys could access each other’s memories and intelligence while merged, it would stand to reason that Captain could, too.

You can probably see where I was going with this.

I imagined that learning the truth instantly, and in a way that he can’t possibly misunderstand or deny, would hit Captain hard. Unfortunately, I barely wrote any dialogue for this fic, and none of it was for this segment. This is the third time I’ve had to say “oops, 2017!me didn’t write this part,” but this is the one I’m kicking myself the hardest for.

So, while I can’t say what I had in mind back then, I can at least describe how I’d write it out today. I think… I think Captain would try to apologize for all the ways Krupp hurt the Boys as kids. Then the Boys would assure him that Krupp’s actions weren’t his, that they don’t hold them against him, and apologize for never telling him the truth. Captain would admit that he probably wouldn’t have believed them. After some more back-and-forth, he’d conclude that as much as it hurt to learn he isn’t “real”, he was grateful it had never kept him from making a real difference.

Eventually the Hamsterdactyls appear on the horizon. George explains what’s about to happen, and Captain realizes what it means for him.

“Don’t worry. The explosion will send all the Zygo-Gogozizzle 24 back into space, but the elements that make up our original bodies should stay behind and reconstitute. At least, that’s what I’m gathering.”

His body had ran away screaming. What would happen to him when...?

This is where, I imagine, the three would’ve said their goodbyes.

Cheff Goal-d’ BLOOOM!

Sir Stinks-A-Lot explodes, and Captain’s mind ends up in the Super-Power-Juice-soaked Zygo-Gogozizzle 24 that gets launched into space. As it solidifies back into rock form, he finds himself watching the Earth grow smaller and smaller.

But the rock starts to crack from the force of the blast, and his vision flickers as it falls apart. He accepts that this is it and decides that, after fighting so hard to ensure the world could sleep peacefully, he’s ready to enjoy some sleep himself.

So he slept, as the remains of Smart Earth splintered into millions of glowing fragments, glittering stars to remain forever in the night sky.

This is the only WIP where I thought ahead and wrote the final sentence, and I’m honestly still proud of it. Because I loved quoting Superman and passing it off as hypotext, it’s a near word-for-word reference to the original radio show’s first episode. The original line is about Krypton exploding, which makes for a nice allusion to both Underpantyworld and Smart Earth. It also just felt poetic to pair Superman’s beginning with Captain’s end.

I cared a lot about adhering closely to canon, but I did notice a continuity error while skimming Book 12 for this post: on the same page as the Krupp-snapping thing, Old!George says he has “no idea how [it] happened.” Maybe I just ignored that at the time, but now I’m imagining him lying so their younger selves wouldn’t be too sad, and now I’m sad. Well, sadder than I already was from typing all this. Oh God, there's still 5 WIPs to go.

So some of these documents have a “Mood Reference” segment at the bottom, where I pasted links to songs with the tone or atmosphere I was aiming for. I often forgot to label those links. So you can imagine the whiplash I felt when I found one in this fic, clicked on it, and heard this. I vaguely remember hearing it for the first time in mid-2017, and thinking of it when I first read Book 12. Sir Stinks-A-Lot threatened to wipe out the concept of childhood itself; in a series about celebrating the adult-offending things that make childhood great, that basically is the end of the world. Him blowing up brought to mind the song's explosive bass drop. And the vocals breaking down until it flatlines… yeah. I never shook off the resulting mental correlation, and I later chose a cover of it to represent this book’s events in Usually Responsible.

Sendoff was always a placeholder title, and I had some better ones lined up: Whatever Happened to the Waistband Warrior?, O Captain, Our Captain, and Up, Up, and Away. If I had to pick one today, it’d be the last one: it's short, it relies the least on hypotext, and it foreshadows where Captain ends up going.

——————————————————————————————————

WIP #6: Untitled Rid-O-Kid One-shot

And together, the two friends wrote and drew and laughed all afternoon.

They didn’t notice how nauseous they were until dinnertime. [Book!Verse, post-Book 12. CW: discussion of overmedicating children.]

You know the part where the Boys’ parents say they like how they’re acting under Rid-O-Kid? The last four books all have their sad moments, but god, this one just hit different. They had no clue their sons were drugged, though, and I liked to think they’re genuinely good parents who would make up for it if they found out. Thus, this fic about them finding out.

This one never got further than a summary, some scattered notes, and a list of Ritalin withdrawal symptoms. I remember some details I never wrote down, too, so I’ll combine them all to paint a fuller picture.

This fic starts immediately after Book 12. The Boys go home for dinner, but realize they can't finish their food. Then they get bad headaches, and their parents get worried, give them the classic childhood check-up, and tuck them in early.

The parents call each other and make plans to ask other parents if a bug's going around. One of them sees the Rid-O-Kid ad on TV (the local network was slow to take them down idk). Meanwhile, the Boys whisper through Walkie Talkies and realize how blurry their memories are of yesterday—specifically after seeing Mr. Meaner in his office.

The next morning, the parents learn the truth from their friend circles and the local news: every kid at Jerome Horwitz is going through withdrawal after getting dosed with an untested drug. Along with them dealing with that bombshell, this segment would have expanded on the incident's aftermath: Mr. Meaner is in jail again, Mr. Krupp has fired him (possibly just to avoid bad press), and the school is closed until its whole student body recovers.

One of the families they call is the Sneedlys. Melvin's parents mention that he's shaken from being used as a guinea pig by a teacher after sucking up to them so much. They also suggest that the withdrawal might hit neurodivergent kids the hardest. This prompts Mr. Beard to dig up the ADHD book he'd read to the Boys years ago.

The Boys themselves wake up very late and very groggy. After breakfast, one family invites the other over for a meeting. There, the parents share what they’ve learned, apologize to their sons for not noticing, and ask what being on Rid-O-Kid had felt like.

The Boys admit that they’d felt a drive to compensate for all the little ways they’d disappointed their parents before, like forgetting chores and wandering off when they talk. Voicing it makes them cry, and hearing it breaks their parents’ hearts. They comfort their sons, assuring them that they’d rather keep those little disappointments than force something like Rid-O-Kid on them.

All three parents call in sick to their jobs, hit the store for bubblegum and cooking supplies, and spend the afternoon baking chocolate chip cookies with their kids. :)

Nothing else to say about this one, except that I mentioned its basic plot in this post.

——————————————————————————————————

WIP #7: Coda

In which George and Harold realize they forgot to say ‘thank you’. [Book!Verse, post-Book 12.]

This one takes place a little bit after Untitled Rid-O-Kid Oneshot. The Yesterday!Boys have recovered enough to keep working on their Dog Man reboot. They discuss their fuzzy memories again, and wonder if their doubles and pets vanishing might be connected.

They make a safe bet that their doubles had gotten Captain to help fix things, and make a note to ask him what happened (and also thank him) when school reopens. One of them suggests going to Krupp’s house and asking him now, and the other says to remind him after they work a little more.

Cut to Monday afternoon. The first full school day since the events of Book 12 has just ended, and the Boys are selling Dog Man #1 on the playground. It’s an instant hit, but a few kids ask about their Captain Underpants series; the last issue ended on a cliffhanger, and they want to know if their hero made it out okay. *wink wink*

The Boys realize they’d hyperfixated so hard that they’d forgotten to see Captain, so they close up shop and run to the principal’s office. They find Krupp reading some resumes and snap their fingers.

I never wrote the dialogue here, but the Boys give a long spiel that’s all “sorry for not checking in with you sooner” and “thank you for saving the day without us” and “have you seen Tony, Orlando, and Dawn?”

They don’t notice Krupp trying to butt in and clutching his head until he suddenly screams at them to shut up. It’s so loud even for him that Ms. Anthrope comes in to see what’s going on.

The Boys snap again, but he just gets angrier; he’s had a constant headache for days now, and their snapping and nonsense talk are making it worse. Any other day he’d gladly trap them here for a stern talking-to, but now he begs them to leave and let him get back to finding a new gym teacher.

The shock of hearing him beg gives the Boys pause. They look him over—no goofy smile, no puffed-out chest—but they still don’t quite believe what they see. Harold breaks the silence with a whisper:

“Captain…?”

But that whisper pounds at Krupp’s skull, and he orders Ms. Anthrope to get them out of his office. They snap even more as she drags them away, but he covers his ears until they’re gone.

Outside, the Boys' denial finally runs out. They tear up at the thought that whatever Captain had done to save the day, he had laid down his life to do so. They salute to him at the office door before walking out of the school. Some kids ask them what’s wrong on the way out; they keep walking, suddenly hyper-aware that they have no one to confide their grief to but each other.

After enjoying the peace and quiet for a while, Krupp thinks about the name Harold called him. The fic ends with him opening his drawer to stare at the Captain Underpants comics inside.

The Mood Ref section for this one contains two songs: Separation Anxiety from the movie, and… this. Like, wow, 2017!me was going through it. (If it helps at all, I just imagined Mr. Meaner in Scar’s place and chuckled. …Yeah, that probably doesn’t help.)

——————————————————————————————————

WIP #8: Letter Column

20 years later, George and Harold still deny everything… even if it hurts. [Book!Verse, pre- or post-Book 12.]

This one was gonna be a Log Fic, made of mock-up screenshots from various sources. The setup is that Old!George and Old!Harold have an official website like Dav’s, including a page dedicated to fanmail. Kids send in questions (with their parents’ permission), and the Old!Boys post their answers for all to see.

The fic would’ve opened with a screenshot of this page, with two Q&A’s visible to show how it works. The next screenshot would be of a third question waiting in the Boys’ inbox:

So I notised this one guy shows up in crowds a lot. I checked every Dog Man book I own and hes in every single one! Whats up with that?

– Curie Yuss, age 10

Attached to the email are close-up photos of different Dog Man pages (drawn anime-style like the one shown in Book 12). Each page has a crowd shot, and a bald man in underwear and a red cape can be seen in each crowd.

Cut to a series of texts between the Old!Boys. Harold opens with a screencap of the email.

H: oh man

H: i REALLY shuldve seen this coming

G: Its okay dude

H: u were right one in each book was too many

G: Calm down its okay! I can take this one solo if you want, Ill draft it tonight

G: [a few hours later] Done! If you like it go ahead and press publish

H: its up now. thx dude

G: 👍🏾 I get why youre worried but hey, its not like we have to lie

George’s response is then shown on the site:

Dear Curie,

I see you’ve spotted Captain Underpants! Harold and I came up with him when we were your age. He thought it would be funny to sneak him into every Dog Man book, and so did I!

Thanks for writing in!

– George Beard

And that's the end of it… until it isn’t. A few weeks later, six new emails sit in the inbox, all asking the Boys if they’ll ever make a Captain Underpants novel.

Now they’re both worried. If they say no and don’t give a reason why, more kids might write in to ask. If they say “maybe someday,” they’d be setting up false expectations. On top of that, they’re upset at themselves for getting worked up over kids asking an innocent question.

G: We probably shouldve put a ToS on the page before we launched it

G: Like “we reserve the right to leave your fanmail unanswered for any reason”

H: yeah we probably shuldve

G: Its too late to add one now right?

H: oh for sure. some kid will def notice. i know we wuld

Then a new email comes in from one Perry Graff and his mom, Artie. She’d gone to Jerome Horwitz with the Boys, and seeing Curie’s Q&A had jogged her memory. She’d dug her old CU comics out of her attic to share with her son, and strangely, one of them had seemingly been signed by the Captain himself. Artie admits to remembering having met a very real Captain Underpants, and asks the Boys how on earth they’d pulled that off.

Attached is a photo of the signature. The cursive lettering is too thin to have been stamped on, and too neat to have been forged by a kid.

If the Boys felt cornered before, now they’re mortified.

H: u know what

G: Trying to think

G: Oh god Lisa just asked what im looking angry at my phone for

H: maybe we shuldve ignored Curie

G: ??And just leave her hanging?

H: better 1 kid than 7

H: also we never heard back from weird Al and we came out just fine

G: We checked the mailbox for like a month!

H: yeah but we moved on. we figured it got lost in the mail or he was too busy or smthn. and then we forgot about it

H: …..why cant we move on from him george

G: Al??

G: Oh

H: why is this still so hard

G: I dont know man. I just dont know

…And that’s as far as I got. I couldn’t come up with an ending—or at least, one that didn’t leave me mad at the Boys—which might be why I scrapped it. Well, besides the whole “designing a fake website” thing. I never started the designing part, but I did leave screenshots of Pilkey.com in the doc for inspo (specifically from the mid-2000’s cus that was the site’s golden age, don’t @ me).

I love George and Harold so much, but I also think they should feel bad for, you know, making an entire person and hiding his existence. Yes, they were 9, and no, I didn’t quite expect Dav to touch on it. Still, it’s interesting to imagine the guilt they might deal with when they grow up and think back on it all.

Trivia time! The Log Fic format stems from an event I almost did at @treehouseblogsinc. The plan was for some space-time shenanigans to change the blog into the Old!Boys’ modern-day site for a little while. It never happened cus I was scared of changing the HTML too much, and its days were numbered at that point anyway.

The main conflict draws from something Dav said happened early in his career. He would draw Captain at school visits, and kids would often ask him to make a full book about him (“Becoming a writer”, fourth paragraph).

Finally, Artie Graff is meant to be that one girl from that one song. I thought it’d be fun to show she got that autograph after all and use it for drama lol.

——————————————————————————————————

WIP #9: Recall

One moment, Mr. Krupp finally had those two delinquents cornered. The next, he was having the strangest dream. [Either Verse, but borrows imagery from the Movie.]

Tired of all this talk about Captain’s “death”? Me too! Let’s dial it back and talk about his “birth” instead!

This fic was a first-person look at what went on in Krupp's head when he got hypnotized. It played out in four acts—the start of the trance, Chicken, Monkey, and Superhero—with the last one having the most Story Meat. (You'll see why I didn't just name it Captain in a bit.)

I remember researching how hypnosis works and what it feels like before starting on this. Most of the real-life “rules” don’t apply here, of course, but I took note of aspects that made sense anyway. For example, trance can help loosen up even the strictest, most habitual thought patterns, which is why it's used to stop smoking; maybe all the years of bitter adult-ing and principal-ing melted away, allowing Krupp to look further inside himself than he had in ages. And maybe he just welcomed an excuse to take a nap during a workday lmao

That research also inspired me to experiment with this fic’s “voice”. Nearly every sentence in here is short, simple, and has a whole paragraph space to itself, as if that’s all the thought Krupp can muster at a time. The sentences get longer near the end, but take on a strange, lilting flow and break into new paragraphs where commas should be.

But enough explaining, let’s get to the actual text already. Act 1 was fleshed out a surprising amount, but given the format, that's not saying much.

I can’t move.

Correction: I can move if I want to. I just… don’t.

I can think of some good reasons to move.

My office’s linoleum flooring is nipping at my back, for instance.

I’m pretty sure my toupee’s fallen off again, too.

But everything is so heavy, and deciding which need to address makes me realize something.

My mind is so… quiet. I forgot it could be this quiet.

I can think… I think. I still have a few thoughts. They're just not pouring in constantly and bouncing off the walls of my skull anymore.

It’s like those walls are lined with cotton. It’s… weird, but not uncomfortable.

… I could get used to this, actually.

Not right now, though. I’ve got paperwork to sort, kids to keep in line.

For ten straight hours… for the next five days.

…A few more minutes here couldn’t hurt.

Captain is associated with cotton, so its mention here was probably intentional. Anyway, this segment ends with two bullet points that just say “SNAP Chicken” and “SNAP Monkey”. Those two Acts never got written (Library of Alexandria-scale loss, I know), but here’s a bit about them from what I think was an early summary:

The night after he gives the tape to Mr. Meaner, Krupp has a very strange dream. First he's a chicken in a coop, plucking at an oddly-shaped pile of grain. Then he's a monkey, swinging on branches that glow and throwing strange white leaves.

Then, all of a sudden, he's a child again.

Surprise—we're in Kernel Theory territory.

Krupp is about 10, lying on a red towel, looking up at some trees and an overcast sky. Something flat lies on his chest; he holds it up and sees that it's a comic book. The cover is blurry, like a half-forgotten impression. All he remembers is that he desperately wants to keep it.

There’s a note here to leave it unclear if this is a memory or just a dream. Either way, Krupp’s thoughts on it might be my favorite excerpt out of all 10 documents:

I squeeze it to my chest and the paper crinkles in my ears.

I don't want to lose it.

I don't want to lose this.

I’m going to lose this.

I won't even remember what it is I've lost.

After a long moment, he loosens his grip on the comic… only for a sudden gust to send it flying. He grabs his towel and gives chase, down a hill and past his childhood home. When he catches it, he feels the wind still tugging at it.

He looks up and sees the source of the wind: a wormhole floating at his height a few feet in front of him. Its rim “glows a searing red [...] swirling endlessly into the deep blue void within.”

Somehow, Kid!Krupp knows where it leads. Somehow, he knows he’s been “stuck” here for decades, and that this wormhole will set him free.

Somehow, he knows it won’t be open for long.

When it closes… I’ll be stuck here again.

All the everything will rush back in and bury me, like nothing happened.

Not this time.

Not while I still have this.

Benny holds his comic up to the wormhole. Its pages fly out one-by-one and form a barrier around the wormhole’s rim, as if holding it open for him.

He looks back at his home, as if for the last time. Then he ties the towel around his neck and charges into the wormhole.

It closes behind him, and the pages start swirling around his floating form. He feels himself change both physically and mentally; he realizes he can choose what to “take with him,” and decides that the “this” he’s reclaimed is all he wants for now. A powerful sense of valiance sweeps away everything else, leaving him unburdened and unbelievably happy.

The void starts to dissolve, beams of sunlight pouring through. He recalls a song about letting the sun shine in, facing it with a grin.

Smilers never lose and frowners never win.

But frowners still want to win

even long after they forget how

and now that I remember

I’ll protect smilers from frowners

until the frowners remember too

and the world is safe and happy.

The outline ends just as he perceives a floor beneath his feet and a battle cry in his throat.

How happy they’ll all be

to know they're being protected

by the greatest superhero of all time.

Man.

There’s a crossed-out bullet point down here about why Kid!Krupp feels “stuck” and is so eager to leave the dream-memory. I won’t go into what it says exactly, and I think leaving it ambiguous instead was a good call. I remember other creatives at the time positing that his Krupp-iness might stem from... well, let’s just say it’s a topic I don’t trust myself to explore at length, even now. This way it can be whatever the reader’s most comfortable with attributing it to.

In the same vein, I hoped to find a note here explaining what his precious “this” was, but there isn’t any. I dunno if I deleted it or just never wrote it down, but maybe not spelling it out is better. If I had to guess, though, I think I was drawing from the Great “woah, I used to love these books!” Movement earlier that year. Sorry to bring it up again, but I can’t overstate how it helped me regain my personal “this”; something nameless that I’d lost growing up, but was drifting aimlessly without.

Recall’s Mood Ref section also has two songs: the first was Interlude by Dunderpatrullen. Words fail me here too, but I put it on SIDE A: The Warden to mark the playlist’s shift from Krupp’s life before Captain to after.

The second song was this. Hardee har har, 2017!me.

——————————————————————————————————

So what’s this WIP based on Book 1 doing among all this talk of Book 12? Well, I tried to expand on the Baby Benny idea with my next and final WIP...

...which I’ll go into in its own post. I know, I know, listen—I’ve been writing all this up in a Google Doc, and WIP #10 alone takes up one-third of it. I REALLY don’t wanna put it off, especially cus it’s nearly finished, but this is already the longest post I’ve probably ever written and I’m scared of invoking this hellsite’s glitchy wrath.

Now, WIP #10 isn’t taking longer because it’s finished or anything—it’s probably the least finished out of all 10, actually—so please curb your enthusiasm there. I just have a lot more to say about it because, unlike the others, it wasn’t a fanfic. It was meant to be something a little...bigger. I’ll leave its description here so you can guess what that means. See you in Part 3!

They created the greatest superhero in the history of their elementary school… but that was all in the past future!

Time travelers George and Harold make a pit stop in 1950-something, a peculiar time when strangers filled your gas tank for you and every band sounded like The Beach Boys. They don’t plan on staying very long, but that changes when they meet a kid who’s familiar and different all at once. Can they safely leave the past without preventing the future? And how will their new friend change how they view their greatest enemy...?

Have you read your UNDERPANTS today? [Book!Verse, post-Book 12.]

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asachuu · 9 months

Text

Just thinking about this on the side here, but if anyone recalls the SKK/Rimlaine comparison thing I used for a while in my original Rimlaine essay to prove a point, an addition to it crossed my mind.

I’m aware it’s quite long, but I would very much recommend reading what I’m going to be referencing here for the sake of context, and also for all necessary disclaimers which apply to this post as well.

I’m not too sure if this is anything particularly worthwhile, though I feel that I would have put it in the essay itself if it were to be anyhow crucial for whatever reason, and it’s also not something I can prove with any kind of evidence since I’m merely speculating about certain matters, so please take it as such. Regardless, out of my own curiosity, I was thinking back on those two ships and why, even though I claim both are unhealthy/toxic (in my personal opinion, that is), I still seem to give the slightest bit of leeway to Soukoku and their fans as opposed to Rimlaine despite having no bias towards it or anyone who happens to like it, and while I did give some brief explanation in my essay which I will doubtlessly echo here as well, I think a part of it might have something to do with the way I see the majority of their fanbases portray the pairs.

Two disclaimers upfront— first, this is by no means going to be a “professional analysis” of anything, unlike the aforementioned essay, rather my own opinionated rant which you should take with a grain of salt, but nonetheless, it’s something which interested me. Second, keep in mind that when I refer to “the majority”, I do mean the majority for both cases from my own experience and all I’ve seen on various sites, which naturally does not mean every single person who happens to enjoy either of those ships— just enough people for me to see a pattern.

While I enjoy neither of those pairings and generally stay away from content of them unless I want to actually research and explore it, for lack of better terms, there is something very distinct slightly frustrating me about many posts in only one of these circles and not the other, even if I set all of my own character preferences aside, and my current theory is that perhaps there are a lot of canonical details and facts ignored or purposely omitted without the intention of creating any speculative alternate universes about what the story could have been if certain events didn’t happen or certain characters had different pasts, characteristics, etc., rather being treated as the unaltered, canonical ship itself, in Rimlaine spaces a lot more often than in Soukoku spaces. While there are specifics in which this could be argued about or ones where I’d actually take the opposite stance, I’m talking about a highly general perspective here, and what I mean by this is that what makes Soukoku unhealthy in my eyes is also its very essence in the eyes of many, many shippers I’ve come across— often times, it’s not so much about their complicated bond with each other and intrinsics one could spend a lot of time analyzing and weaving their own theories about, but the simple premise of an “enemies to lovers” ship whose main appeal is commonly their crassness towards each other, their fighting and bickering or all their harsh interactions we get to see on basic surface level. I might have hinted or briefly mentioned this in my essay as well, but I haven’t really made it a point of much attention to myself, so only now am I actually realizing this— most people cannot take away this aspect of the SKK dynamic in any content they make of them as it’s widely accepted and understood as the main core of it, the main driving point for both shippers who enjoy it in a more casual way and those who make great efforts to dive deep into every second of time the pair hold any relevance to each other. To erase it would be to practically create a whole different ship (which some do as well, of course, but I’m certainly not here to give my thoughts on such matters), and while it would be expected of me to claim that I see no reason as to why Rimlaine seems to not be treated this way as well, instead becoming either extremely sanitized or just outright unrecognizable, I sadly get the feeling I do, in a sense.

I believe that for many, the essence of Rimlaine has, just like in Soukoku’s case, also been widely accepted as a particular well-known trope— however, it only barely represents what it is in canon. I did mention some tropes in my essay too, but one thing I’ve noticed only as I started writing this is the differences between them individually and what exactly they speak of. To refer back to both the former paragraph and my original set of posts, the ones mentioned were essentially “enemies to lovers”, “hating everyone but one”, “running out of time” and “missed opportunities”, should I put them in very simple summaries, yet I can place these into certain broad categories— the first two would belong into one which describes behavior patterns between the characters, all while the others mainly describe events or situations, not necessarily anyone’s bonds or ways of communication, actions and so on, which could potentially explain why Rimlaine differs from Soukoku here.

For some, the core of those two will be something similar to the second mentioned trope, with the most important aspect being either matters to do with Paul’s hatred of the world and the complete opposite that his partner was, or even Arthur’s care for him which he held for no one else, but I often see a slight nuance related to this— in Rimlaine’s somewhat special case, both the former and the latter can be understood the exact same way as Soukoku’s behaviors are, this being an inherent part of each character respectively and something which creates their dynamic itself, yet this ship has an additional layer of the way their story arc ended in Stormbringer, which ties both of those points to that very ending and either of the last two mentioned tropes rather than a part of both Arthur and Paul’s personalities. In this manner, it doesn’t separate the pair and pay attention to them more as individuals, even in an extremely watered down sense like the basis of Soukoku does, but it ties them to their story together instead. Unlike with Dazai and Chuuya, where most people aren’t focused on leading towards either an “end” or specific story point which is also a key factor for defining a certain popular ship premise created by various occurrences and narratives, rather looking at how the two see each other or even how they speak towards each other, work together, trust or distrust each other and so on, in Arthur and Paul’s case, most are focusing precisely on Stormbringer’s epilogue and the aftermath of it, which was the event fully driving home two points for a lot of readers— one, Arthur cared enough to do anything, even sacrifice whatever remains of his life were left for his partner, and two, Paul finally realized his gratitude and regret towards the other, even though it was too late for it. Still, it seems to me that many aren’t looking at both them and these points of interest from the very start of their relationship or even their development and dark path onwards, rather from the end, as that’s precisely the moment where some people will suddenly find a sorrowful tale they would wish to explore, and that is the thing that becomes their defining feature— it has quite little, dare I say sometimes nothing to do with their personalities, how they affect each other, treat each other and whatnot, but everything to do with the events which transpired between them and culminated into something one could define in a mere four or two words, just as I did above.

This way, unlike in Soukoku’s case, you can take away the aspect which, for me, qualifies this ship as a toxic, if not outright abusive one, because it hasn’t been made the actual essence of it for a certain community, although I do have to point out that despite this, you can also take away the element which does serve as such, purely because by itself, it doesn’t necessarily define their hypothetical relationship in the case these events did not occur. While yes, the full context of that chapter certainly speaks volumes about how the characters felt about each other both post-SB’s epilogue and preceding it, for many who haven’t been focusing on them from the start or simply chose to overlook all else, it will “begin” precisely at this hopeful-yet-hopeless place from which the main foundations to one’s personal experience of the ship will be developed instead of letting those take roots in the clearly unhealthy baseline dynamic that continues without a light at the end of the tunnel for both novels the pair are featured in. Of course, the vast majority of people in the Rimlaine community are very well aware of the pair’s past, as how the characters come to know each other or develop a connection is often a crucial or at least somewhat meaningful part of any ship, this one included, yet all such matters of the past ultimately culminated in something, instead of being treated as ongoing and inherent to both Arthur and Paul respectively— an event that has the spotlight shined on it thanks to its tragedy. While the centre of Soukoku are mostly their constant friendly-yet-hateful interactions people quite literally flock to them for the sake of, the centre of Rimlaine is pretty much just the above— plain tragedy. Doomed by the narrative, doomed by circumstances, and what would happen if we took all of those away? What would we be left with? SKK would be left with absolutely none of its “charm”, while Rimlaine would likely be left with however much hope or potential people chose to saw in them.

Now, if any of this makes even a sliver of sense to anyone besides myself and has some actual truth to it, I can’t say I really blame anyone here. I still retain my position that a huge portion of why Rimlaine gained popularity as a ship is wilful or blissful ignorance, but if such a thing didn’t exist, I simply don’t believe it would gain much traction beyond a few people you’d find in every single corner of the internet, no matter how moral or not you find the given topic, as you can’t really make the core of this ship follow the same premise as Soukoku unless you seriously couldn’t care less. In terms of a pairing with two guys constantly arguing with each other, being rude on every occasion and beating the shit out of one another, hilariously enough, I have to say here that it’s mutual and reciprocated, and while by definition, it would absolutely count as an abusive relationship, you could say they both play an equal part in it and this aspect of them isn’t highlighted with any genuine real-life seriousness by BSD either, which is not Rimlaine’s case whatsoever. Everything important about that pair is in my essay, hence I won’t be rewriting it all here, but as a TL;DR just in case, that pairing rather explicitly features only one victim and only one abuser (not to mention it’s directly based on a real-world relationship which was precisely that), unlike SKK where if you actually wanted to, you could say each of them occupy both positions at once. You simply cannot make the focal point of your pairing not only abuse, but also power dynamics and extreme one-sidedness, plus a character who does explicitly suffer the aftermath of all such actions and never finds closure until their end, all of which are things that are in no way treated as an ongoing gag in the given media, purely because 99% of the time— and how I seriously wish it was all the time— if you do so, you’re most likely not actually shipping them and are already on my side, as you would have no reason to do so in the traditional definition of the word.

A part of me wants to put it very bluntly here and say the Soukoku shippers have at least owned it, which is why I don’t find it as worthwhile for myself to cover that ship head to toe as well— whether they’re aware of it or not, they fully display the aspect of their pair which some would find to be the attractive part and some to be entirely unhealthy instead, and it’s not as though the viewer has to crawl back into the source material to make up their mind for themselves on that front. As for a lot of Rimlaine content, it’s the exact opposite— had you never read Fifteen or Stormbringer and relied solely on a large portion of fan works, I’m willing to bet you’d go through quite a lot of assumptions before you’d actually get even the tiniest idea that it could perhaps resemble more of my own description, if at all. Granted, I also don’t really focus on Soukoku for one very obvious reason, that being my primary interests residing elsewhere, but if I were to do so, I’d be at least somewhat relieved that the main issues I personally have with the ship are common knowledge, not something I would have to point out to people and only then wait for a response, anticipating I could have easily just spoken about things I consider obvious and others find extremely niche or even entirely unknown about their own pairing of choice. Perhaps it’s not even that I “give leeway” to SKK as I said at the beginning, it’s just that my own thoughts about it don’t relate to things that get hidden away much too often, and thus I have at least some faith that the story writes itself on that end for people who see it, or would see it the same way as I do if exposed to it.

Anyhow, I have no particular conclusion to this. There is a chance I’ve made a lot of this much more complicated than it actually is in reality, and I’m not too certain whether any of it can really be backed up or denied. It’s just something that crossed my mind out of the blue.

#upon closer thought I’ve decided to tag this so I apologize to the deeply confused #this almost reads like a conspiracy theory #text post #bungou stray dogs #bsd #bsd nakahara chuuya #bsd osamu dazai #bsd arthur rimbaud #randou #bsd fifteen #bsd storm bringer #I’m very afraid of the SKK tag but not the other don’t mind that #rimlaine #asachuu

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sleepymarmot · 1 year

Text

Seventeen Moments of Spring (1973): a review

Here is the non-spoilery review/introduction/recommendation I promised.

For many of us living in the post-Soviet states, this title needs no introduction. It’s impossible to remember how old I was when I encountered a Stierlitz joke for the first time — elementary school age, maybe earlier? What I didn’t realize was that the show had become such a hit not just because of its effective mythmaking or because the hero is absurdly badass, though both of these things are true. It is also genuinely brilliant TV that stood the test of time with ease.

Seventeen Moments of Spring turns 50 in a few months. That means that as good as the show is, it is of course also dated in several ways. The most noticeable is the pacing. This show was made for an entirely different attention span in mind. It’s not a problem of a slow start — the stakes are established within the first episode. But every individual scene takes more time than it would have taken in a modern show, and the addition of real newsreel footage slows down the action even further.

Another thing that is noticeable to the modern viewer is how gendered the story is. The nigh-untouchable (to a certain extent — no spoilers!) protagonist embodies pretty much every masculine virtue you can think of, and selflessly sacrifices his feelings for patriotic duty. There’s only one prominent female character, and she is given the opposite role: more vulnerability, more raw emotion, less opportunity for dashing heroism. The show’s director is a woman, and this might rightfully be a factor in you deciding to watch this show — but don’t let that give you false hopes for a feminist narrative.

The show is an adaptation of a single novel in a series, and that has certain effects on the plot. One of them is a huge benefit compared to what saturates the modern pop culture: the show wastes no time on establishing an origin story, opening in the final months of the war with all pieces already on the board. The main plot was perhaps better suited for a book format: I found it convoluted and difficult to follow, especially when the voiceover narration didn’t offer extra explanations. By the way, the show’s method of information delivery also needed getting used to: for me, plot developments were often confusing upon first introduction, and became clear as they were explained later.

But you don’t need to know anything about the plot beforehand. I didn’t. I was only aware of the premise — a Soviet spy in deep cover in Nazi Germany — and that was probably the perfect amount of knowledge. My viewing experience was a strange version of a completely fresh unspoiled first viewing where I had to guess where the plot was heading and concentrate hard on following it, except I’d known the protagonist’s name since childhood and so had to simultaneously observe another process: how it slowly ceased to be the name of just the joke character and became the name of a dreamy angsty hypercompetent hero I was forming an emotional attachment to.

One of the main factors of the show’s success are the attraction and sympathy the main character inspires despite — or, rather, because of — his emotional unavailability. The creators understood the appeal of a handsome man who is not only very good at his job but also represses his true self and creatively adapts it to the environment just as clearly as any modern day fangirl does. He is in tight control of not only his actions but also every emotion he allows to reach his face. The actor’s expression barely changes even in the most open, unguarded moments. And yet the hero’s exhaustion, loneliness, and homesickness are effectively conveyed with the help of the iconic music in the long, slow scenes, achieving the lyricism that became one of the most memorable aspects of the show.

Don’t look for historical accuracy here. According to several researches referenced by the Wikipedia article, the setting was more of a reflection of the USSR than a faithful depiction of the Third Reich. I assume that watching this will give you more insight on Soviet culture than on WWII.

You might want to check out this show if you are interested in:

hypercompetent protagonists

also very competent antagonists who act like three-dimensional humans and not evil cardboard cutouts

men who are emotionally repressed almost to the breaking point

Stoic Masculine Angst™

political intrigue and spy mind games

the unrelenting tension of working against some of the most dangerous people on the planet right under their nose

all sorts of people living in a totalitarian state, the roles they have chosen to play in it, and how they act when they know its days are numbered

excellent acting

black and white cinematography, intentionally chosen over color for stylistic reasons

beautiful theme music

On the other hand, here are some things that you might want to be aware of. The pacing is slow, the plot demands attention, and the material is often heavy — so it’s more of a “slow journey over 2-4 weeks” show than a “binge in two days” one. For me, the episodes usually took more time to watch than their actual runtime, and left me exhausted — and I suspect I’m not the only one. Important content warning: one of the episodes shows real concentration camp footage; you can notice when the narration starts going in that direction and prepare yourself. There are also scenes of physical and psychological torture inflicted on people of various ages starting from a very small child; they’re not gory but still disturbing. Some other scenes I found hard to watch because of how suspenseful they were. On the flip side, you might find the black uniforms and cars a tad too sleek and fashionable, and there are characters based on real Nazis who are written and played charismatically enough that you might be surprised by how happy you are to see them on screen. Don’t even try to apply any modern Western standards of representation, obviously — not only because the show is half a century old but even more so because of the setting. Ignore the colorized version if you encounter that, watch the black and white original.

Finally, I can’t not mention why I suddenly decided to watch this classic after having zero interest in it throughout my entire life. The last few months of 2022 were brightened for me by two works of fiction:

A star-filled, stylish cult 1973 drama about a Russian man in a violent Western European environment, featuring a time/clock motif and a major female character named Katya

A 12-episode TV show about the fight against fascism, notable for portraying the antagonists as humans as opposed to one-dimensional evil caricatures, and likely to irritate some viewers with its slow pacing

I started watching Seventeen Moments of Spring because it was a classic antifascist espionage TV show from 1973, and was amazed to discover that it also shared all other features listed above. It’s not often you watch something at just the right time mostly by coincidence! Shout out to the film that is definitely real and the show that might be a fandom’s collective fever dream (or is that the other way around?) for bringing me here.

#семнадцать мгновений весны #liveblogs and reviews #blah blah blah

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gettothestabbing · 1 year

Text

Since I’ve already begun, let me continue from the previous personal post.

I am so very tired of hearing my sister complain about situations that I want to be in. She’s married, pregnant, has a new house, and lives close to our father. But unlike me, she doesn’t see the last thing as beneficial in any way. (The rest, she’s pretty stoked about.)

She has a terrible relationship with our father. He’s definitely not been a good father to her in many ways, so I understand. My relationship with him is better because I don’t feel the need to argue every difference of opinion we have. I’m less confrontational. I still value some of his advice. I don’t admire him anymore, but I can connect with him and tell him things sometimes.

Mimi has never forgiven him for some terrible things he’s said to her. His remarriage destroyed their relationship over several years. He’s excited for his first grandchild, and Mimi hates it, because he is making her pregnancy and her moving closer to him all about him. He’s very self-focused and feels entitled to her time and space because he’s her father. She’s keeping him at arms length. Her husband doesn’t like him at all. I keep trying to play peacemaker between these three and it just doesn’t work very well, long-distance or otherwise, because they won’t talk directly to each other. So all I can do is listen when they each complain to me about one of the others and try to help them see the other perspective.

When I’m tired, lonely, unable to live with my beloved cats (currently living with her), having awful date after awful date, unable to make plans with friends because I had to move to another state for work where I only work evenings and my coworkers are all immigrants who only hang out with each other, I get pretty fucking sick of complaints about how awful it is for people to (1) want to see her not-yet-fully-furnished house, (2) give her advice she’s not going to follow about her baby, or in Dad’s case (3) act entitled to her time and try to make her invite people over that she doesn’t like.

Oh gosh, people want to be around you and help you out? Wish I had that! People are selfish and don’t understand you when you literally have refused for years to actually tell them how you feel about anything? Go figure!! Do you think there’s any way to change that? No? Ok, just tell me how much you hate them for not reading your mind. It’s not like you sound exactly like my patients, who are nice until you mess up the plan they have for their day in their head that they never told you they had.

I’ve had one relationship. One. We had 6 dates and then 2 years of terrible long-distance nothing. Outside of that, I’ve had like 30 first and second dates. The only way I cope with that is by trying to turn these experiences into funny stories for others. She married her first boyfriend from college after living with him for like a year. She’s never had a bad first date, or used a dating app, or been stood up or ghosted or dumped or had someone just give up on the date twenty minutes in with no explanation. She got pregnant the first try, while I am trying to accept the increasingly real possibility of never being able to marry or have children. She hasn’t had a job in years because she doesn’t need one, and is having a lovely time being a homemaker and mom-in-waiting. I’d love to be either of those things, if not both. But given how long it’s taking me to find anyone to even hit a third date with, I’m just trying to reconcile myself to being happy single and working my whole life. Got to prepare for all possible futures and ward off despair!

I really wish I didn’t feel so resentful of it all. I want to be a good older sister. I have a good job, save my money, act on my principles, and try to be kind. I hope I’m setting a good example in the ways that I can. People always assume that she’s older than me, not because of her looks (she’s gorgeous), but because she’s married/pregnant/a homeowner/always giving me advice. They’re quite shocked when I reveal I’m the older one. It’s all disheartening. I always wanted to be a great older sister, ever since I realized what that term meant. But Mimi never needed one. No one else sees me that way.

And the longer Dad’s second marriage goes on, the more I realize that he doesn’t need me around either. When Mom died, Dad started to rely on me a lot. I got into an all-IB high school, so I didn’t have to do chores like Mimi, but he relied on me more emotionally. So when he remarried, and I went to college, I was still relying on him. I called and talked to him regularly. And when he had his stroke, I took care of him during the day. I gave up my summer job immediately. Even when he decided to switch to medical care, I supported his physical therapy as much as I could during law school. But now I live several hours away again. He stopped showing interest in my life unless it was about my being promoted or dating; his dating advice is usually “be nicer to the guy” no matter how I’m being treated. When I do call, he’s just not interested in what I have to say anymore, so I call much less often. He’s been married to my stepmom for about ten years now. I’m not married or giving him a grandchild or close by, so I’m no longer a priority. Even if we’re not as close now, it hurts to know that. I can’t imagine complaining the way Mimi does about Dad wanting to be around me or see how I’m doing.

Usually I try to finish these long whiny posts with something uplifting or hopeful, but today, I really don’t have anything. Honestly, sometimes I wish I was sad and crazy enough to actually kill myself. I’m not at that point and hopefully never will be. But I almost wish I was. I feel like I’m failing at life and I can’t reach out properly to people without feeling like a burden and quickly reversing course and telling them I’m fine. If I had a serious problem, maybe I could get the support I want, but I shouldn’t wish for such things.

#this is super long and family-focused so don't feel like you have to read it #I have a huge complex about complaining #I try to do it less but it always comes out somehow #this probably all sounds like 'i have it worse so you should shut up'#I can recognize that #but sometimes you just have to talk it out with yourself without worrying about nuance too much #personal #pers com

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circa-specturgia · 2 years

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Happy Storyteller Saturday!

Can you tell me how you went about creating such a detailed magic system? What inspired it? What did you consider to figure out so many aspects?

Count me fascinated @writingonesdreams

Happy Storyteller Saturday, and thanks for this ask @writingonesdreams! ✨ This made me look into my old docs, I don’t think I’d actually opened them up since I first wrote them… They were BAD, but, made me appreciate how I managed to make something I’m proud of out of them!

Starting with how I went about it…

LOTS of trial and error.

I may have mentioned this somewhere previously, but, all those posts on Specturgy are the 5th iteration of the system, depending on how you count it, considering the idea went through a few overhauls previous to me even writing down the 1st.

I knew since the start that I wanted to make something unique for the magic of the world.

Where did I get the ideas…? I can’t say I remember every single thing that inspired me, (obviously). Many were simply images I saw that sent my mind into a brainstorm of several hours of hyperfocus on an idea, tailoring it in short or long scenes and making it fit with the rest of the system in mind, though I do remember two in particular that definitely had a bigger lasting impact, one in the very beginning of the creation of the system, and one towards the very end.

The first, which inspired me in the beginning, was the system of bending, in Avatar : The Last Airbender. My initial ideas were very focused on just the elemental magics, as all my characters were elemental mages, though I decided to add more as I wrote down the 1st version. I made some additions, other types. The first version had three types, the second version, five.

A while back, I began to rework the system again, for the 3rd version, having taken a break from writing entirely for a while and feeling like I needed to make it all anew to feel like it was something I could work with, nearly entirely scrapping the 2nd version and making something a lot more grounded, a hard magic system. It was around then that a friend introduced me to the work of Brandon Sanderson, the master of hard magic.

Next came the 4th, which I wrote in order to give it a better fit into the visualization I had in my mind, to make more details concrete as I hadn’t quite finished the 3rd on paper, and to give it a better detail, this was around the time when I realized I wanted something with detail and rules and names and complexity, and the time I realized that I absolutely loved worldbuilding! Midst of quarantine too, so, I had the time.

Finally, the 5th, the iteration posted on here, which contains pretty much most of the 4th, though with some naming changes and some of the content cut, and with more details as to things like Weaving, Imbuing, and the exact workings of Specturgy, as I hadn’t had those down until then, the act of posting it giving me the opportunity to give it more thought!

The aspects of the Pentacept, those I had to greatly rework. I had the idea of materium vs immaterium as the two branches since the 3rd version, but I’ve only made the concrete decision on the five aspects of viðumancy as I was writing the post on Jynkaturgy and Viðumancy itself!

Onto some bonus interesting stuff after that boring explanation and look behind the curtain!

Something that I came up with quite early, and still have in my current setting, is the concept of dragons! Namely, in my setting they’re fictional. Well, to be more specific: The people of the setting believe dragons to be nothing more than tales, stories of beasts whose lifeblood is the elements, which stand as tall as mountains and remember he beginning of days. This is an idea I had in the earliest days of my setting, previous even to writing down the 1st version! Namely, the main characters were then the wielders of several stones, which were believed to be powerful crystals and catalysts of their magic, but they’d later discover them to be the crystallized hearts of dragons long past! Thought you might like this little detail on dragons Dreams!

The system, in its 1st and 2nd iterations, had a very large connection to gods, which I’ve since scrapped. I’ve since chance my mind on the idea of including any sort of “origin” for magic, instead choosing to leave it a mystery, and doing away with gods altogether, opting instead for a variety of entities, creatures and powerful beings, but not any sort of true pantheon or actual higher beings which would appear…

#answering asks #storyteller saturday #wip.circa specturgia #circa specturgia #writeblr #writers on tumblr #writing #writing community #writing thoughts #writing inspiration #other writers!#wtwcommunity

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tellthemeerkatsitsfine · 2 years

Video

I’ve said recently that I appreciate how Nish Kumar has a bit in one on one of his stand-up albums in which he talked about how he was a huge fan of The Office, before saying that makes him disappointed in how Ricky Gervais became such a shitty transphobic asshole later on. Obviously it’s good when anyone calls out bad things, but I know from both observing the world and from too much firsthand experience that the hardest thing to do is recognize when someone you like and respect does something shitty, when your instincts say to defend them.

Nish did have a long explanation about how he once loved The Office the way only a proper nerd can love a TV show, had the dialogue memorized and everything, and that makes me appreciate how he was willing to resist any instincts he had to make excuses for Ricky Gervais. But I think John may have done him one better here. To be fair, Nish Kumar did explicitly name Ricky Gervais repeatedly, and the naming was “explicit” both because it was unambiguous and because it involved shouting the words “Fuck you, Ricky Gervais!” John didn’t quite do that, but he as good as named him, I’d call this close enough.

So given that, I think I have to give John Oliver credit for turning on the man who, if Wikipedia is to be believed (which it isn’t always, but that is a fact I’ve read in a few different places and is probably at least slightly true), may be responsible for the entire life and career he has now. That is an impressive level of refusing to tolerate bigotry from anyone, even the person who elevated you from a career that was on track to plateau no higher than a hosting job on a BBC Radio Four show.

I have been complaining lately about how I blame HBO for commissioning Last Week Tonight and ending the John Oliver era of The Bugle, which is upsetting because in the last few months, the John Oliver era of the The Bugle has gone from something I’d never heard before to one of my favourite pieces of media in the world. But all that aside, I do want to say last night’s episode of Last Week Tonight was especially good (I mean, obviously they’re all very good, it’s one of the best parts of television from the last decade, but still, fuck you HBO), and is really worth watching if you’re someone who likes that show but may not watch every single episode.

He talked about tech companies’ monopolies, and particularly about how that has turned the internet into something worse than it used to be, with a few big corporations pushing you toward their products and away from everything else. I know this is of interests to a lot of people on Tumblr, because I regularly see posts about how the great thing about this site is its relative resistance to the corporatization of the internet, and I agree with those posts. Tumblr is far from perfect, but I do love that it’s a very rare corner of the internet that is not completely dominated by that sort of thing. Anyone else who finds that interesting will probably be interested in the main story from Last Week Tonight s09e14 about internet monopolies, which will probably go up on YouTube at some point because I think they normally do that not long after the episodes air.

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missfortune-xyz · 1 year

Text

starting at the beginning.

Why in the godforsaken year of 2022 am I starting a Tumblr blog?

I felt for a while that, before I post anything I had prepared, that I find some kind of justification to explain or validate why I’m here. First, is blogging dead now? So why start? Second, why Tumblr of all places?

We all know Tumblr has built up its own distinct reputation (the word ‘hellsite’ comes to mind) and its associated more with fan culture than the traditional blog format. This kind of blog would appear to be much better placed on something like WordPress or Squarespace, so why Tumblr?

I’d like to make it known before I continue that this is by no means my first major encounter with Tumblr. This account is indeed new, but I’ve been here since the ripe old age of 11 back in 2014. Like many of you, spending my formative years on this website has led me to witness things that the average non-tumblr user may find deranged. It’s been a tumultuous journey, but I never felt the need to leave Tumblr either.

As a nerdy tween/teen in the mid 2010s, Tumblr was an obvious choice for me to spend my spare time on. The shows I liked, the games I liked, the books I liked all had communities here that I didn’t have access to in real life. I lived in a small village on the outskirts of a small town in the middle of the English countryside – there were no physical spaces I could go to discuss these interests. I think this feeling was and still is common amongst most of us. Tumblr filled a social gap that the majority of us did not have the resources to fill IRL.

Originally, when I was considering making a blog, I looked at WordPress. I still use my personal Tumblr account (I’m a certified stalker account – I like and I reblog but I never post), but at first, I looked to WordPress to host my ramblings. It’s a giant in the blogging world and every single blog example that I’ve seen that exists in my desired genre existed on WordPress.

I quickly encountered two major issues when I started to look into this.

The first was that any feature I would need to use to create what I wanted was behind a paywall. I’m a student! £200+/year is not something I can afford to fork out when I’ll mostly be rambling into the void!

The second, was about the feeling of WordPress. It felt a bit too… professional… for lack of a better explanation. I did not want to create some majorly branded, almost commercial site, I wanted something that reflected myself much better. I have no intention to behave with the utmost seriousness in my blog, and so I decided I wanted to look to make something significantly personal to myself.

(This is by no means to bash anyone who does use WordPress, I still think it’s great, it’s just not what I’m looking for.)

This brings me back to Tumblr. Whilst my most recent personal account is in default design purgatory, my blogs of the golden age were customised to the nth degree via themes. For a short period, I even began to learn to code so that I could experiment further (although I’ve long forgotten it all now). It fit almost perfectly – free, customisable, casual, and already knew how to use it. Any issues I identified felt dwarfed by how right it felt to start this blog on Tumblr. It felt nostalgic, it felt student-y, it felt like myself, and most of all it gives me the freedom to explore this format in any way I want to.

Tumblr might be on the edge of a revival anyway, so…..

I’m not sure if this will ever get any audience, but to be honest, that isn’t really my concern. Really, who cares about traffic? It almost feels more comfortable not having an audience - less pressure, more freedom. It feels like I’m using Tumblr ‘wrong’ (but is there really a way to do so?) to be using it like this, since my history with this site has been more fandom-based, but my convictions are solid. I’m perfectly content with speaking into the void, and any notes I do receive will be treasured.

I’m going to leave my personal introduction to the next post. It was really important to me to just get my rationale out of the way first, whether that be for practical reasons or just to absolve my own anxieties. Starting a blog is, for who knows what reason, scary and this is my first time making an account with any intent to post on. I hope you stick around, it’ll be a journey as I figure out truly what I want this to be, but I think it’ll be fun nonetheless.

#writing #blog post #tumblr culture #tumblr dot com #article #blogging #blogs #i know this is so unnecessary but i really felt the need to justify this TT #xyzwrites #missfortunexyz

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officialgritty · 3 years

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How I Would Humble NHL Players

An essay written by bigboigritty.

I would humble hockey players the only way I know how to, by sending them to Australia. Let’s suppose that they have decided to hold the All Star game over here (forget about it’s usual date) (forget that some players I have listed below might not be invited) (and while you're at it, please forget that Australia’s rinks are Not Good).

I think that they would suffer but in an entertaining way so it’s fine.

First of all, their biggest concern is getting sunburnt. It would effect all of their dumb asses but I’m particularly worried about Pierre-Luc Dubois and Mitch Marner. Boys are practically translucent. Vince Dunn would be fine, he’d probably wear a shirt most of the time which is a very smart decision.

You may wonder why I didn’t mention Nolan Patrick because I am a certified slut for him, well I don't think he would have a problem. He would spend most of the time inside and when he joins the others, I think his Virgo ass would reapply sunscreen. Maybe he would burn slightly but I don't think it'd be enough to make him uncomfortable.

Another thing that I think they will gain from this experience is a higher pain tolerance. Now you’re probably thinking, “Zoe they are NHL players so they can handle pain.” Wrong.

Real pain is running barefoot on cement at theme parks while you race to get to the next ride. Also getting into the car and having to avoid touching every piece of metal to not get branded like a cow. Or better yet, when the heat gets so bad that there’s a black out because everyone has their air conditioning turned on.

Don’t get me wrong, I know that other countries have scary animals but I would pay to see them panic over ours. Crocodiles here can grow up to 5.2 metres / 17 feet. We have a box jellyfish season where it’s advised to avoid swimming or wear wetsuits for coverage. Funnel web spiders can survive underwater for hours by trapping air bubbles around their skin. We have several of the worlds deadliest snakes present across the country.

Listen, I don't want anyone to get injured but the constant fear that they would have when doing anything would be enough to make me happy.

My biggest question is who would survive in the shady areas, who would survive the eshays?

Under no circumstances can you look them in the eyes or cross their path. They are not to be feared individually but in groups caution is advised. I think the players would attempt to assert dominance and that is simply not an option. You are better off to ignore the eshay.

Nolan would have no issues here if im being honest. He is big and I don't think they’d find it worth it to fuck with him. But you know who they would target? Matthew Tkachuk. “Where are you going pretty boy?” “Oi braa did we hurt your feelings ya pussy cunt?” They would make fun of his hair in particular.

Travis Konecny would be an eshay. I don't think I need to make further comment. (So would Louis Tomlinson but I am not a 1D account and I will continue to repeat that until it’s true.)

I would also give them a few iconic tasks to get the true Australian experience. Activities for the ‘vacation’ include triathlon events, beach flags, bush walking and climbing the harbour bridge. They could attend a cricket match but they tend to like golf so unfortunately they would probably enjoy this :(

AFL is an extremely popular sport here and I think they would loose their shit when they learn the rules of this game. No protective equipment is used other than mouthguards, that's it. That’s all you get. And jumping onto other players for leverage is encouraged. I would thoroughly enjoy the fights that would break out because of this.

Another task would be to use a map to make their way to a servo for a slurpee. The catch is that they will be required to pass through multiple alleyways. Also, the season is Spring, it’s swooping season mother fuckers. Let’s see how brave you are when birds chase you down the block. Personally I don’t think any of them would pass this test, maybe McDavid because the birds may not be able to detect a heartbeat.

Australian food would disgust them, I just know it. Things that they would need to try are a Bunnings sausage sanga, fairy bread, lamingtons, baked beans on toast, Milo and Vegemite. Because I’m me I would give them no butter with their Vegemite.

An after thought I had was money so I’m editing this to include it. Everything here is EXPENSIVE so they would need to learn how to budget. Upon doing research, Canadians would be fine but the Americans will be mad.

1000 CAD = 1019 AUD

1000 USD = 1297 AUD

Another after thought was the fact that they won’t be able to drive (or at least drive well) here. We drive on the left and not the right, same goes for walking paths too. I can sense a lot of them bumping into people.

Where I think players would live based on vibes alone:

Carter Hart and Vince Dunn: North Shore Beaches, NSW. Daddy’s money. Carter probably did Nippers whereas Vince was a skater boy.

Travis Konecny: Darwin, NT. Would 100% live there and enjoy it. He would try to conduct crocodile tours but gets assigned to feeding the baby crocs and doing shows for little kids.

Tyson Barrie: Perisher, NSW. One of the only ski resorts we have to offer, major friendly mountain man energy.

Nolan Patrick: Byron Bay, NSW. @antoineroussel enlightened me, steering away from my original thought of Katoomba, NSW. Byron Bay is a magnet for hippies and links rainforest to the ocean. Chris Hemsworth and his family also live there.

William Nylander: Perth, WA. I don’t know much about Perth other than they wouldn’t shut up about partying while the other states had to quarantine. For some reason, I also associate Perth with Tik Tok.

Sidney Crosby and Connor McDavid: Melbourne CBD, VIC. These two would live in the same apartment building in the city, Connor one level above Sidney. It’s the most boring looking block of them all and Crosby would send in complaints to the landlord about McDavid pacing during the night.

Tyler Seguin: Surfers Paradise, QLD. Party central, not many people are actually from this area and he would be sure to tell absolutely everyone that he was. I also think he would get a Meter Maid tattoo, specifically on his leg. Has definitely slept on the beach before because he couldn’t find his way home.

Jamie Benn: Hobart, TAS. Tasmania is usually forgotten about. Another one with mountain man energy except he is more creepy than friendly.

Mitch Marner: Fitzroy, VIC. @antoineroussel is responsible for this one too. Hipster central, makes you question how the hell someone so young can have so much money. Would chug $45 wine and not blink an eye.

(honourable mentions include = Sammy Blais: Hobart, Tas. Once again no comment on Tasmania. TJ Oshie: Cairns, QLD. Would do reef tours. Haydn Fleury: Western Sydney, NSW. Haydn would 100% own a ute or a white holden commodore and you can’t tell me otherwise. Roman Josi: Adelaide, SA. Small town history teacher vibes.)

I have attached a handy map for those who may need it.

In conclusion, the NHL should send their players over here to teach them some manners and while they’re at it, management should bring themselves too. Nolan Patrick could pass as an Australian if he built up a tan. (So does Nylander in this picture but we won’t talk about that.) Come over anytime baby, I’m free.

Glossary

Servo - A service station, also known as a petrol or gas station. Example: 7/11

Theme park - An amusement park. Can be said in reference to both normal parks and water parks and usually means those in QLD. Example: Six Flags

Swooping season - August to October in Australia. When birds attack and chase humans and / or pets for getting close to their babies. Magpies are notoriously bad for this.

Bunnings sausage sanga - A cheap feed / meal found at the front of a hardware and gardening store called Bunnings. Made up of white bread, sausage, onion and your choice of sauce.

Fairy bread - White bread with margarine and topped with 100s and 1000s / sprinkles.

Meter Maids - Women who work along the beach dressed in gold bikinis. They top up parking meters to save tourists from getting fined and will often stop for photos.

Nippers - Surf lifesaving programs carried out for children between 5 and 14.

Ute - A pick up truck.

Eshay - A person who partakes in drug use, graffiti, listens to EDM and targets victims in groups. Below is the typical style of an eshay.

Tagging a few friends so this doesn’t completely flop but feel free to ignore if it isn't your thing. I won’t be offended lmao

@scheifefe @ifiwasshawnmendesidslapmyself @d00dlebob @bowenbyram @kempe @prettyboyroope @quintonsbyfield @travisgermy @pitoftrash @kspitehockey @ballsakic @canadianheaters @bricksatlandyswindow @powerblais @brokeninsidebutnobodyknows @jamiedrysdales

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