#I’m not saying they’re not valid criticisms I’m just saying it was almost 20 years ago

[tailsrevane]

[podcast & comic review] the adventure zone, campaign 1: the balance arc

i have… just… a lot of feelings about this.

this is messy. and a lot of the criticisms you’ve almost certainly heard about it if you’ve looked into it at all before coming across my years-too-late review of it are spot on. bad d&d, bad representation. all of that shit is hella valid. and all of it is why i’m not going to devote more time to the adventure zone after having finished its first & by far most celebrated arc. but what’s equally valid is that this podcast is also responsible for some of the most singularly incredible, and unique, storytelling moments i’ve ever heard in any medium. it grapples with themes that you just don’t expect the guys who riff on yahoo answers to come at you with.

there are also all kinds of mitigating factors about the most-criticized aspects of the podcast, for what it’s worth. like, yeah there’s some examples of bad representation. but it’s bad representation made by guys who were trying to do good representation and accepted & even signal boosted criticism, and then did their best to do better. and that matters. i’m sorry, but what are we even asking for if that isn’t exactly how we want to see creators handle it when they fuck up?

the bad d&d was easy enough to shrug off at first, because i like these guys. i don’t know as much about clint, but his three sons are some of my favorite comedy podcasters. i’m kind of out of my mbmbam phase. i binged it for a while, and i did genuinely enjoy it, but i’ve gotten to a point where a general interest podcast that doesn’t really focus on any specific kind of content that i’m hella into just doesn’t hit the spot anymore. but i’m still grateful for the space it had in my life for a while. i’ve just always deeply appreciated the wholesome & warm vibe of their content.

the easy narrative is that when adventure zone was at its worst, it was because griffin (my favorite of the performers involved, fwiw) just wasn’t giving his players space to co-create with him. and admittedly it is pretty hard to be impressed by that brand of d&d when i have shit like dimension 20 in my life now, but honestly it also just isn’t that simple. because yeah, in a macro sense, griffin’s tendency to railroad his players does grate on me. but you can’t just say that that’s always bad when a lot of the best moments of the podcast are actually him narrating at his players. i’m talking about the truly heartbreaking shit in the divisive “stolen century” mini-arc. i’m talking about the penultimate episode, when this podcast became about the entire fucking world hearing a story that gave them hope, and then getting their asses up and fighting. this dude can write.

this dumb fucking d&d podcast had me fully sobbing on multiple occasions, and the fact that it clearly had the same effect on the people making it, that they cared so much about it, and just… fuck if that isn’t one of my biggest weaknesses. i like feeling feelings. i like other people feeling feelings. i like it when people care.

also, like… yeah there are stretches of this podcast that get pretty railroady, but a lot of times it’s not, and a lot of times the players really do get to meaningfully co-create. and sometimes it’s just magic.

earlier in the podcast, before shit gets really real, there’s an arc where they’re in basically a fantasy car combat/race, and this arc has just one of the most purely awesome moments i think i’ve ever heard in any work of fiction? justin just shocks everyone by summoning a fucking magic bicorn named garyl and everyone freaks out about how fucking cool it is and just… i love how into it everyone is. and a few seconds later justin gets nervous and asks how fast the battlewagons are going to make sure this is going to be practical, and griffin responds, “approximately garyl miles per hour. [...] are you kidding me? i’m not going to ruin your fantastical visions with a thing as ridiculous as speed differentials.” and just. i love it so much.

i love “yes, and”ing and then actually supporting it. i love how excited they all are to craft a story together. i love justin managing to pull off something that caught griffin totally by surprise and griffin just aggressively supporting it. and i just wish there were more moments like that in the podcast. because if you ask me, that is d&d at its best. it’s literally what this game is for.

totally warranted criticisms aside, i really did enjoy this podcast. the truly special moments more than make up for the things about it that frustrate me. and fuck, no matter how much i might disagree with aspects of griffin’s dming style, i really do love a lot of his characters. especially angus, and lup. they’re just so badass in drastically different ways. just. i could’ve just spent all this time gushing about how fucking awesome lup is.

what really sticks with me about this story, though, is that it contains ideas & feelings that are just truly so much bigger than the imperfect shell containing them, and there is something so achingly divine about that. griffin weaves a story that grapples with themes of immortality & the nature of existence & the literal end of the world in ways that are so thoughtful, so thought-provoking, and convey the reality of those things so much better than fiction usually does… everything else aside, i just have to stand in awe of that.

the graphic novels are cool, too, but if you’re only going to do one or the other i for sure would go with the podcast. but yeah, the comic does a great job of adapting the content of the podcast while making necessary adaptation choices to account for its different medium. the art is pretty lovely, and killian is just as pretty as i imagined her–i mean, what? nothing!

[loquaciousquark]

Talks Machina Highlights - Critical Role C2E111 (Redux! Oct. 13, 2020)

Gooooood evening good evening good evening, all! I started the VOD late for this recap and somehow the first four or so minutes of the show have a Twitch audio copyright claim, so I am reduced to only reading Brian's lips when he asks if we're on the internet. Hilariously, Marisha's background room is a comfy-looking blue/gold fabric wall with a ceramic colorful abstract lamp and a yellow silk scarf over the lampshade, and Taliesin's is an industrial looking games room in grey and black with multiple monitors, overhead speakers, and mysterious metal fixtures behind him. What a treasure this group is, honestly.

Tonight's guests: Marisha Ray & Taliesin Jaffe, discussing episodes 110 and 111 again. I wildly speculate once more about what might have caused their absence: jury duty? Sam appearing on The Masked Singer? Something to do with the animated show? One day, we’ll know, one day... (One day this “copyrighted audio” section will come back from the wars, too. Ugh!) Finally! The audio comes back to reveal Brian discussing the endless reality of digital meetings and Marisha talking about (I think) her glare-reducing glasses she’s wearing. Welcome to the New Age (welcome to the New Age, to the New Age).

Announcements: Marisha suggests checking out Dimension20, another live tabletop gaming group, which premieres live on Wednesdays at 4pm (CollegeHumor). 

Brian immediately wants to know how they feel about the revelation that Molly is alive. Taliesin’s personal reaction: he “knows some things” he can’t talk about and is aware of several possibilities that might be going on, but had a sneaking suspicion that there would not be a body for them to find. He says it’s almost all there for anyone to see in past material. Marisha’s personal reaction: she just wants to know how she’s doing with her theories, & was trying to block Tal’s face out deliberately as she was going off on her theories in the last episode. Taliesin says he thought her ideas were pretty good!

Cad has no clue what to think - it’s like listening to your friends talk about Buffy. Marisha thought it was a 50/50 Molly would still be there, but Beau had no idea. Not that it mattered, because as soon as Matt went through with it the reveal still blew their minds. Tal laid out his plans for the character with Matt during Campaign One (towards the end) after they all got their VM tattoos.

It is a “horrifying and gross” thing to dig up a body, and Beau was pretty reluctant to do it. Tal, as Cad: “Sometimes dead’s better.” The moral quandary of trying to speak with a dead friend was very different here than the frequent occasions they used the spell in C1.

Taliesin says his poker face is very bad, so it’s easier for him to over-react and let it all play out. The only other player he can see very easily from his place in their current setup is Travis, and because he knows Travis doesn’t watch TM, tweet, or participate in social media, he admits he thoroughly enjoyed watching Travis freak out at his freaking out. He says he only knew about 20% of what Matt described at the end of that episode. He was picking things to mug to increase Travis’s surprise. I love this so much.

Taliesin provided the table left leg shake; Travis provided table right. Ha!

Beau is really accepting her role in the Cobalt Soul. It’s good when “as a person, you feel like you can settle into your calling. Sometimes you can do more from the inside than fighting from the outside.” It’s a mirrored but opposite path of Keyleth from C1; Beau felt like she was too good for her duty, while Keyleth thought she wasn’t good enough.

Caduceus is not a big believer in jumping to conclusions. He does have an idea/notion of the “city of the undead” and thinks all this necrotic energy must come from somewhere, and wonders if this is the “capital of anti-death.” He’s willing to believe whatever he sees. This is one of the few things that trigger a bit of loathing and disgust in him. It was terrifying that the Wildmother didn’t know anything.

Beau is pretty confident in her Charlie Day impression laying-out-the-research last episode. She enjoyed taking the things that were known & extrapolating around them; this is a huge facet of Marisha’s own personality and she really enjoys it, so she built a character this time that would allow that kind of puzzle-solving. It’s also why she repeatedly notes when Beau journals, so she can avoid metagaming. Trent’s mention of Vess Durogna’s tomb raiding was completely circumstantial, and the only reason she’d made the connection to the Tombtakers was because she’d recently reviewed those notes for a separate unannounced project. Sometimes she tries to make connections and Matt is like, “It was...just descriptive. Just flavor. The curtains were red...” and she has to discard a paragraph of notes. She feels like it’s still something they have to do because of “look at what he does! Look! It’s totally valid!”

Cosplay of the Week: @kitsunstudios with a gorgeous Caduceus with a very intricate silk vest.

Caduceus’s takedown of Trent! One of my favorite moments in the entirety of C2. Taliesin felt Trent was an asshole; Caduceus felt sorry for him because of how dumb he thought he was. Caduceus’s response was "this is the dumbest man I’ve ever met in my life. He’s so dumb! Is nobody going to tell this guy how dumb he is? Oh, they’re all freaked out. Somebody needs to tell this guy he’s an idiot before somebody gets hurt.” (Marisha: “Before?”) Tal says it was the product of several years of therapy and many drunk conversations with Whitney Moore. It was from a genuine place of concern from Caduceus. “How are you allowed to have this much power and be that dumb?”

Brian loved how funny it was to watch everyone tiptoe around Trent and then Caduceus bulldoze through the end of the meal.

Taliesin: “Damage doesn’t make you interesting or better. It’s not what makes you good. Character isn’t found in damage. Just recovery.”

Brian & Marisha commiserate going through the stage where believing surviving something automatically made you a stronger person, better for the pain; instead it just meant you had to pick up the pieces after. Marisha talks about how strength through survival may be true for some people, but it shouldn’t be considered a necessity. Taliesin talks about how he used to think he had to be miserable to write. Brian talks about how believing he liked reading and writing miserable things only limited him for years.

Marisha feels it’s a C2 theme that almost all the PCs have someone trying to handwave or take credit for their accomplishments or explain their pain as being for their own good (Trent, Beau’s dad, Obann). She thinks it’s interesting to see all the various ways people try to take credit for your work/delegitimize you as a person. She loves that RPGs allow you to explore these odd moralities in interesting ways. The only way to fight it is to have a sense of your own self-worth, which is a problem a lot of the M9 started with.

Caduceus likes everyone, and really likes people who appear to need role models (Eodwulf). “With the right friends and the right bar and the right attitude, I think he’d be okay. Come over here where it’s so much better. That seems like an exhausting friendship that you have there.”

Marisha loves the mix of personalities in the M9; Veth, Cad, & Jester were all “we kind of like them!” after the dinner, and she immediately made eye contact with Travis and they both shook their heads. She knows Beau has to go along with it for Caleb’s sake for now, but she & Fjord are pretty sus of Trent’s proteges.

Beau is less concerned about Artagan’s relationship to Jester because “he showed his ass--she’s less worried about Jester now because a little of the magic is gone.” It’s a little like becoming an adult and realizing your parents are also just adults & human. Caduceus wasn’t suspicious of the Traveler for a long time until they got to the island. Aside: Taliesin loves the pantheon in D&D. “The notion of attempting to apply common Western conceptions of religion to a world where you have a pantheon of interventionist gods as baseline makes no sense to me. Everyone admits that every other god is there and doing shit; it has more in common with ancient Rome than anything else.” Now that he knows it was a con, he feels the wind had been taken out of it. He does have a sense that Jester’s gotten back together with an ex: “I hope that I’m really happy for you.” They’re both interested to see how Jester navigates the new relationship.

My internet goes out, of course. I panic for a second, thinking I’ve lost everything above, but all is well! Thanks, Form History Control addon!

Marisha loved punching Artagan, but regretting rolling so poorly. “I miss violence.” Dani lets us know it’s been about four episodes since the last battle.

There’s no way the Cobalt Reserve doesn’t have a single document on the Eyes of Nine. Beau believes “there are no real secrets” because people are just bad at not writing things down. For there to be no information at all seems really suspicious for her.

Fanart of the Week: @oddalchemist on twitter with some awesome Beau conspiracy red-thread boards overlaid a distant shadowy Molly walking away.

Caduceus feels a little guilty for really enjoying his time right now with the M9 and not wanting to go home. He’s starting to suspect that he’s going to go home very different than when he left. “He has the softest problems. I don’t know if I want to move back in with Mom & Dad.”

Beau is trying to get comfortable with the idea of being happy. Jester is probably Beau’s first real best friend & one of the first healthy female friendships she’s ever had. As long as she still has Jester in her life, she doesn’t care. For Yasha... “At the end of the day, Beau is a lonely person and has always been a lonely person. And I think you kinda reach this point where once you’re not lonely anymore, you can kind of come out of the fog and realize that was horrible! And terrifying! And is even more terrifying now that I know what I could have, and I don’t want to go back to that. At the end of the day Beau doesn’t want to be lonely anymore. There’s always been that flirtation with Yasha, but everyone had to figure their own shit out. And now it feels like it’s coming out a little bit of that haze, maybe this actually could be...” There are a lot of ways they complement each other & are good-different from each other. Marisha believes people can be attracted to more than person at once.

Caduceus doesn’t think nature turned against him on Rumblecusp, it was just a reality of nature being dangerous and violent. “He has a complex relationship with nature.” He doesn’t expect special treatment.

Thoughts on the mansion: “Man, it’s nice to be seen.” Marisha: “I don’t know how I ended up becoming the Scanlan of this campaign, but I’m living for it.” It felt like an echo of “I’m better for having known you.” They compare Marisha taking specific notes on the campaign to Liam taking specific notes on people’s favorite tapestries, comics, etc.

They talk about missing theme parks and daydream a park version of the mansion in CritRoleLand. It’s lovely.

Taliesin never expected Divine Intervention to work; he just wanted to roll some dice. He’s still processing what he saw/heard. They all agree it was very useful in the Vokodo fight.

Vilya! Marisha: “Ah! Ah! Ah!” As a player, Marisha was so deep in Beau’s eyes she didn’t pick up it was Vilya at first (especially since Matt really emphasized they should not be looking for C1 NPCs). Marisha’s brain melted. She bawled her eyes out on the ride home after that episode. Right after it ended, Laura told Marisha “Keyleth finally gets her happy ending,” and it makes Marisha emotional again since Keyleth’s story ended so bittersweetly. She talks about the very real feelings of “just wanting them to be happy, though!” She went back and listened to all her old Keyleth playlists. Everyone was teary after the episode. “Everyone has these 100% real memories of being these characters and having these good times.”

And that’s that for that! Thanks for your patience, all, and is it Thursday yet?

[prinxlyart]

How do you think some of the other parents would react to the blight parents journey to redemption/being fully redeemed? I think it would certainly be shoking at first and they'd be skeptical because of how much of a reputation the blights have built

Ooooo this is a good one I like it okay let’s see

Willow’s Dads

I think Willow’s dads have an especially sour attitude towards the Blight parents just because of Willow’s personal history with Amity and those 7 years of non-stop depression their daughter suffered because of Alador and Odalia’s actions. They’re extremely skeptical of the Blights trying to “turn over a new leaf” and are convinced they’re only saying so because they want to get something out of it. They’re also both especially protective of the Blight children after they’d originally escaped the manor simply because what the ever loving fuck did those two sorry excuses for witches think they were doing to these kids???????

After Willow explains why Amity stopped being her friend all those years ago, her dads sort of. Accidentally adopt? Amity? Sort of? They legit tell her that she’s welcome to stay with them any time and for as long as she needs if she ever has any trouble, etc etc, and no joke they offered their little 2-bedroom flat to the blight kids when they were first discussing their escape plans. They wanted to be absolutely certain these kids would have a safe place to go the moment they flew the coop.

They love Luz. No question. Okay, maybe one question: why is she so insistent that she try to make those good for nothing Blight Socialites see the error of their ways? Their heads are so far up their own vain asses; they consider Luz’s newest quest to be an impossible one. They’re rather surprised when Luz reports back that her talk with the Blight parents actually went in her favor. They still won’t believe it until they see it though, which Luz concedes is fair. It’s not until Camila (who they also love) also reports back weeks later that she made them cry and that they bound themselves in an everlasting oath to Luz that they were going to do better that they finally believe it.

They defo still don’t like it, but yknow. They’re trying? Which is more than they could say of most of their childrens’ lives? And it’s extremely tense; even though all of the Blight children are adults now, these two Very Good Dads (still with no names; please Dana I’m begging you) find themselves acting as chaperones occasionally to the Blight kids when they meet up with their parents. Usually when it involves Amity (as she’s the future daughter in law), but they also don’t hesitate when Edric or Emira ask for their backup as well.

Viney’s Parent(s)

I’ve seen a lot of fanfics where Viney only has one parent and I don’t know why that’s so common. Regardless, Viney’s parent(s) would be fucking livid at the Blight parents. Not only did they openly criticize their daughter (viney) to her face, but also just the years of shitty parenting they inflicted upon their daughter in law and her siblings??? Super not okay. In fact, they were so spiteful, it was a common theme muttered under their breath at Viney and Emira’s wedding. Viney’s parent(s) could almost constantly be heard whispering something about how glad they were that Odalia and Alador weren’t there or how disapproving they would’ve been at any display of affection the newlyweds would share. Long story short, they fucking hate the Blight parents. Where Willow’s dads are much like Willow in that they would let their anger simply simmer and fester like a dark storm on the horizon, Viney’s parent(s) would be the vicious winds of the storm fast-approaching.

Similarly to Willow’s parents, they offer the Blight kids their home if they ever need it. I’m not sure if Viney has siblings or not but regardless, they’d figure out at least three different bedroom solutions for the Blight kids if they ever needed their help with anything.

As much as Viney’s parent(s) love the Blight kids and want to protect them, they actually find planning Viney and Emira’s wedding as the only parent(s) rather difficult. Although that lasts for all of five minutes before the doors are blown off their hinges and Willow and Luz’s parents (and parental figures) burst in like a super hero squad. These adults all want to make sure all of the Blight kids are happy, not just the one that associates with their respective daughters. It just adds fuel to the fire when all of these parental figures show up and the Blight parents don’t.

When they do show up while they’re all trying to plan out our girls’ triad wedding, Viney’s parent(s) have nothing but cold, venomous hatred in their heart(s). How dare they try to reinsert themselves into Amity’s life at a time like this???? It actually takes everyone in attendance of this wedding planning meeting to keep them from just ripping the Blights to shreds where they stood.

Everyone Loves and Respects Camila Noceda. It’s like an unspoken law in the Boiling Isles (and probably also in the human realm, but we’re not there rn). As soon as Camila explains why the Blight parents are even allowed to be at the meeting is because of their willingness to change and the effort they’ve already put in to making amends with their children, Viney’s parent(s) back down. But they don’t stop seething.

I don’t think they truly believe the Blights are in it for their family and not for some other ulterior motive until the day of the wedding. Like, it literally takes Alador walking his daughter down the aisle and taking his seat and just dissolving into tears for them to actually believe they’re here for their daughter. They see Odalia holding his hand tightly and dabbing at her eyes with a handkerchief which is more emotion than they’ve ever seen from Odalia Blight ever. They’re only finally convinced that the Blight parents are capable of changing during the wedding itself. After that point they go much easier on them.

Luz’s Family

I think Eda and Lilith have more personal ties with the Blight parents. We know they all at least went to school together and likely have interacted in the past. Lilith much more recently as the Ex-Head of the Emperor’s Coven and likely actively checking in with other coven heads and their immediate subordinates while also attending to her coven leader duties. I think if they hadn’t been witnesses to Camila ripping them to shreds, they would find it hard to believe too.

Whether or not they believe it, they have very little faith in Alador and Odalia’s ability to actually change much. Or at least, Lilith has the least amount of faith. Eda’s got faith in the Nocedas wedgie-ing those stuck-up Blights into acting like civil witches. And if anyone can melt some ice-cold hearts, it’s the Nocedas. Eda trusts her girls.

Lilith doesn’t not trust them, she’s just worked professionally with them in essentially the same office as them (probably different departments) for the last 20-30 years and hasn’t seen them change once. They seemed somewhat happier in the workplace after their children were first born, but they kept themselves strictly professional at all times. Unless, of course, they were bragging about what new accomplishment their children had achieved. All this to say, the Blight were not so easily swayed.

I think between the Bligjt parents and Lilith there’s a lot of like? Reciprocal Validation in their progress to be Better? Like, Alador and Odalia look to Lilith as a sort of example for someone that used to be in their position thats spent the last several years working hard to change all of that and be worthy of Luz and Eda’s time and attention (and respect. Sometimes Luz still struggles with that one). Lilith sees the Blights’ progress from the view point of someone that’s gone through those same struggles of unlearning everything you thought you knew and building it back up into something more healthy, and she lets them know that they’re doing well, at least compared to her when she was in that same place however many years ago. Idk if the Blights and the Clawthornes were ever friends during school but I like to believe that at least during the hard parts of the Blights redeeming themselves, they do make a real friend in Lilith as someone that understands exactly the mental place they’re coming out of and trying so hard to fix.

Eda generally keeps to herself when it comes to the Blight parents. She loves the Blight kids, of course, one of them is head over heels for her own kid and she’s been a proud bystander watching their relationship flourish over the years. She’s fiercely protective of the Blight kids; any time any of them show up at the Owl house with distressed looks, she immediately puts a kettle to boil and starts prepping some tea before they can even start hashing out what new complicated BS they’ve got stirring in their noggins. She started doing this as a way to not have to deal with teenage hormones because when did her house become a teenager safe-haven??????? But then continued it over the years because all the kids found comfort in the small act of love and care. Even though Emira and Viney are married by the time the Blight parents begin their Redemption Journey, Emira will still stop by the Owl House from time to time and just sit and have tea with Eda (as a fellow trouble-maker, Eda feels a special kinship with the twins. She never minded the Twins’ presence in the Owl House despite all her complaining that her House had turned into a teenage clubhouse).

Any time the subject of Alador and Odalia comes up in conversation, Eda just sits back and crosses her arms and shockingly, remains silent. She knows it means a lot to so many of them; Luz and Camila seem especially invested and she cares for those Blight kids more than she’d ever admit out loud, but she’s not here to get involved. She’ll quietly support her kid’s noble efforts and be on standby in case shit hits the fan, but otherwise she wants nothing to do with the Blight parents.

King is surprisingly observant when he wants to be. He can see just how much this means to Luz and to Amity and knows that while teasing here and there might be okay, he would respect their wishes to continue trying to make the Blight parents decent people again. But that doesn’t mean he likes Alador or Odalia. He, just like Eda, had been among the ones the Blight kids had turned to when they were at their lowest points and seeking comfort over the years. He’s acted as those kids’ teddy bear for years. He only wants them to be happy (he insists it’s so he can stop being the Family Snot Rag but everyone knows it’s because he loves them). So he, like eda, remains silent whenever the topic of the Blight Parents comes up in conversation.

King and Eda defo talk shit about the Blight parents when it’s just the two of them. They will rant for hours about how shitty the Blight parents are and how undeserving they are of this second chance that Luz is giving to them. Whenever other people bring them up, Eda and King will exchange glances and eye rolls. King will often go to Eda’s lap (if she’s sitting) and pretend to nap on her. He’s actually listening and gripping Eda’s dress in his claws as a reminder to Eda to not say anything. Eda does the same under the guise of petting him; she’ll run her fingers through his fur and just grip tightly whenever she feels him starting to grow agitated under her hand. They don’t like the situation, but they also don’t need to be part of it.

Camila’s so fucking tired you guys. She’s long since accepted that her daughter lives in the Demon Realm and that the demons living here tend to only be different in physiology compared to humans or witches. Otherwise, they’re exactly the same as any other person.

No, the true demons, Camila’s discovered, are those like the Blight parents. Those that neglect their children in favor of something so frivolous as social standing and at the same time, thrust ridiculous expectations on their children to behave in the same way such a social standing would require. Withholding affection as something to be earned rather than giving it as the basic need children require. As if their love was something to work for like Luz doing all of her chores (and not forgetting them) for a month to earn a new book. She’s disgusted to say the least. But! Luz is her whole world. And the Blight children are a part of her world. Putting in the work to change the Blight parents for the better rather than just writing them off as a lost cause is something that means a lot to Luz (and by extension, the Blight kids who Camila’s adopted in her mind. She adores Amity and loves watching Eda interact with the twins). So she’s ready to put in that effort. If only so she can scream at them to their faces about the million ways they’ve fucked up and get away with it.

Camila doesn’t....like Alador and Odalia, just sort of on principle. If anything, she pities them. What sort of lives have they led where they think treating their children so horribly was even an option? As she helps guide them into being decent people, she does get to witness their actual personalities break through the tough exteriors they’d crafted for themselves. Alador is a dork. Odalia is quite smart despite her dumb life choices. Both are extremely talented in the magic paths they’ve pursued. Alador is like every man ever and cracks dad jokes that literally only Luz (and sometimes Edric) finds funny. Odalia has a quick-witted kind of humor that you have to stop and think about before it sinks in what she’s said.

It takes a long time for Camila to actually be able to stand their presence, but I think she tolerates them by the time their daughters’ wedding takes place. After that point it’s a matter of chipping away at those stony exteriors they made decades ago to get their real personalities out into the sunshine. By the time those masks are gone, Camila finds she actually doesn’t mind them being around. She’s okay with them being in-laws. I’m not sure if they ever become like. Friends? But they certainly come to a point of mutual respect. Eventually.

Thank you so much anon!! This was a super cool thought exercise :0

[loverscrossmp3]

20 Questions for Writers

thank you for the tag @aeridi0nis !! <3

How many works do you have on AO3?

6!

What’s your total AO3 word count?

oh goodness. a very little 25,237 but! considering i only started posting like three months ago i can’t be too hard on myself

How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

only harry potter!

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1. hold me like you mean it

But out of all of those moments, large or small, the biggest mistake of all was Lily Evans sleeping with her best friend all in favor of soothing his heartache.

(And falling in love with him in the process.)

2. this side of the universe (bare & brief)

they're seven and they're twelve and they're eighteen and somewhere along the way, they became something more.

3. the tide that falls

“I love you,” his voice is a whisper; a soft, tender tone of nothingness murmuring the words that mean everything.

The words that could change everything. Only, they weren’t said to her.

4. glitter and glow

The stars are twinkling, the revelers withdrawing, and Lily and James—who simply relish in their affinity.

5. whispered ruinations 

When Regulus was small, he was afraid of the dark.

When Lily was small, she was afraid of thunderstorms.

Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

i do! i crave validation... always, so comments make me incredibly happy :)

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

i just looked thru my fics and apparently i’m a whore for angst but not angsty endings??? idk most of my endings are ~somewhat~ hopeful, although whispered ruinations has a pretty Not Hopeful ending if u squint 

What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

probably glitter and glow because who am i to make established jily sad and/or this side of the universe (bare & brief)

Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written?

i have not! i think i’d have to be very creative in order to come up with a plot for one and atm i am very much Not There.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

thankfully no — actually, most everyone has been the complete opposite and almost unnecessarily kind! idk what to do with all this kindness!! help!!!

Do you write smut? If so what kind?

not really! i’m not exactly sure how i got through hold me like you mean it (a whole friends with benefits type situation) without it including smut (at least explicitly) but here we are!

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

i don’t think so? i hope not??

Have you ever had a fic translated?

not that i know of!

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

i haven’t!

What’s your all time favorite ship?

jily without a doubt!

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

hmm, i’ve mentioned before a next gen. james sirius potter fic that i’ve started and as much as i’d like to get back to it, i don’t think i’m quite in the headspace to write a whole, multi chap fic lmao. i also have a texting fic that i’d love to finish but after writing one chap, i’m completely unsure of what actual plot there should be oops

What are your writing strengths?

i have absolutely no perception of myself or my writing so i say it with 100% honesty that i have no idea LMAO. hmm i’d like to think that my pacing in the actual story is fairly good though — as in things don’t move too fast or too slow? idk tho sorry!!

What are your writing weaknesses?

plot ideas for sure and dialogue! i am simply not funny enough!!

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

it’s a lot of fun to read but i’m with ridi on the writing aspect. my five years of French were simply not enough and i think the country of france as a whole would take great offense if i made an attempt

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

harry potter!

What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

i am incredibly harsh and critical of myself so unfortunately i’m currently in the phase where i’m not a fan of my works hahaha. but!! this side of the universe (bare & brief) is something i am quite proud of myself for. the feedback i got back from everyone was so wonderful (and that may play a part), but it was a much different style than i usually went for but one i’ve been wanting to have a go with and i think it really helped to sort of solidify how i want to write moving forward! idk, we’ll see!!

tagging: @crimson-snitch @maraudersftw <3

[piccolina-mina]

I have very mixed feelings about the sudden policing of shows and movies for casting “teen” romantic leads whose actors have an age difference. Whether you like it or not, this is how Hollywood works.

Yes, adults are usually cast to play teens to get around working hours, child labor laws and schooling. Yeah, there is something to say about the disproportionate casting of mostly older guys as teens when casting actual teens as female leads.

And yeah, in the past 40 years of film and television some of it has been downright disturbing, but there’s the almost irksome tone policing that’s happening now where we’re hyper-critical of works where romantic leads have real life age differences between actors, even when the actors are both legal, and even when the characters they’re playing don’t have an age gap. 

And people being told they can’t promote or enjoy a work’s in canon love story because of the age difference between the actors portraying the characters. And even comparing or accusing shows who happen to have this type of casting and who have a love story as essentially peddling kiddie/philia, and I just cannot … I can’t. Sorry. No.

Things aren’t taken into consideration such as typically an entire story may be written before casting even happens. Sometimes casting the right person for the role will include someone who isn’t the same age as the character. This is how the acting field functions, and within reason, this is something that all actors, including the young ones and their parents are aware of etc.

I do find it interesting and have noticed an unfortunate pattern that folks are particularly critical of this when it comes to young actors of color as romantic leads, and it doesn’t sit well. Because while the concerns are valid and shouldn’t be discounted, only being this consistently vocal about it to the point of policing fandom and chastising and discouraging fans from daring to enjoy a ship between the CHARACTERS … there’s a lot to unpack there too.

I’ve seen this recently with Never Have I Ever. Maitreyi Ramakrishen is 18, and Darren Barnet is 29. Yeah, no lie, it is hella weird even within the context of the show because of Devi actively seeking out a physical relationship and also Darren LOOKS like a 30 year old man.

I saw it with The Sun is Also a Star with Yara Shahidi and Charles Melton who are like a decade apart in age. But was something I didn’t notice while watching at least.

But I’m also seeing this with Julie and the Phantoms. The show could not get more wholesome and chaste. The romance between Julie and Luke is innocent pining, but folks are still super worked up about Madison being 16 and Charles being 21, and you would think the characters got it on with no clothes in the backseat of a Volvo or something. And I’m just trying to understand what the guidelines are now.

Because there are DEFINITELY some fkd up and problematic age gaps. Brooke Shields’ mother basically p*mped her daughter out doing films like Pretty Baby. It’s grotesque and should be criminal. She was 14 doing s*x scenes. Simonetta Stefanell was 16 doing them and playing Al Pacino’s wife in The Godfather. Kristen Stewart, Drew Barrymore, Jennifer Lawrence, Dakota Fanning (ironically with Stewart) and more have definitely been in some questionable roles doing questionable things with questionable age differences.

But then, specifically teen stuff we’ve collectively enjoyed is open to critique, no doubt, but it’s also not dissected the same way or has the same expectations? And I don’t know.

No one batted an eye over 19 year old Tyler Posey paired with 26 year old Crystal Reed, and it definitely didn’t discourage anyone from enjoying their ship…

Trina Mcgee was 28 when she started playing Angela Moore on Boy Meets World and was even expecting at some point, and Rider was 17, but we weren’t discouraged from enjoying Shawngela (because of that anyway 😒).

Mila Kunis was 15 on That 70s Show with a 20 year old Ashton Kutcher.

Selena Gomez was 16 and Drew Seeley was 26 in Another Cinderella Story.

Andrea in the original BH90210 was in her 30s.

Taylor Momsen was 13 on Gossip Girl (still weird AF casting choice honestly) With 19 and 22 year olds over time.

Claire Danes was 14 to Leonardo Dicaprio’s 22 in Romeo and Juliet. And to 21 year old Jared Leto (which eww) in My So Called Life.

Lyndsy Fonseca was 14 with a 25 year old costar playing teen love interest on Y&R

Peyton Kennedy was like 15 with Sydney Sweeney being 22 years old in Everything S*cks.

Mischa Barton was 17 The O. C. with 24 year old Ben Mckenzie.

And Sasha Pieterse was 14 made out with 23 year old Shay Mitchell in PLL.

Cobra Kai, which is two seasons in now, has a love triangle between Sam, Mary Mouser who is 24, Diego, Xolo who is 19, and Tanner Buchanan who is 21.

I’m not arguing that people shouldn’t feel some kind of way about some casting choices or aren’t entitled to feel a certain way about this. I’m not even arguing that Hollywood doesn’t have an issue here because they clearly do as evidenced by examples above.

But I’m just genuinely trying to understand where we’re expected to be as consumers and fans of fictional works, characters, and relationships (again, within reason) if we’re not allowed (by public opinion and fandom space) to enjoy the fictional stories and relationships, romantic or otherwise because of casting choices…

Because I’ll admit, Devi and Paxton on Never Have I Ever was distracting as hell because Darren has like crow’s feet and everything and doesn’t pass as a teenager even by the absurd tv standards, so I couldn’t get into the pairing.

But I’ve been a diehard Shawngela fan for years, and that age gap between the actors didn’t deter me back then and it still doesn’t now.

And imagine my surprise when I bingewatched one of the most wholesome shows of this godforsaken year only to discover it’s now wrong to enjoy two adorable teens singing to each other lovingly and hugging because apparently there’s a five year age gap between the actors playing them and therefore it’s problematic to like the fictional pairing.

Like, I guess this is controversial, but Tumblr, I’m tired.

[widobravely]

Tell me your thoughts on the bluemenduo!

MY THOUGHTS ON THE BLUMENDUO. HM

first of all: wizards. hiiiiiiiiiiiigh int. no self respecting archmage wannabe is going to be fine with a 19 int, oh no, it has to be 20. I bet the wizards are side-eying Beau for wearing that headband of intellect. "Capped at 19 int? Pfft."

Which means: Eadwulf criticalrole? Not a himbo. I'm sure he's leaned into the archetype at times, hot buff henchman, but remember, Astrid and Bren and Eadwulf were handpicked to become Scourgers. Just because Astrid is the most overtly ambitious ("a hunger," Caleb said, interpreting it as a hunger similar to Trent's) doesn't mean Eadwulf is someone to dismiss. And not just because he can melee.

(Fun idea: Caleb fails to kill Trent. Astrid fails to kill Trent. It's Eadwulf who kills him with a precisely aimed steel wind strike.

Steel wind strike allows you to strike up to five targets. Who's to say Eadwulf won't take out his competition?)

I'm just saying: don't trust them.

We are shaped by our environments. Our personalities and core values are shaped by what we do and who we hang out with. Remember: Bren at 16 was lawful evil. Astrid and Wulf have been killers for something like 15 years. That's got to take a toll.

They were abused. They are being abused. We know that, we see that, we are not in any way trying to downplay that.

BUT.

They are still scourgers, still killers, still the arcane thugs of the empire. More than that: they've been in the presence of toxic influences all that time. Who's to say that, in a moment of weakness, in a moment of------

Listen. 20 intelligence. A ragtag group of weirdo assholes against the Cerberus Assembly, the all powerful cabal of mages you've been raised your whole life to almost revere. Imagine being offered the chance: Get rid of them, strike at them, and you can become one of us.

Your mentor, almost your father, your abuser and shaper and creator: imagine his pride in you.

And Astrid: almost two decades of working your way up from poverty, rising high and strong, struggling to make your mentor see you. And then your ex boyfriend comes back and your mentor's like: here, take the promotion Astrid has worked her ass off to get.

Listen, lawful evil 20 intelligence. It's risky. But all things are risky. If you plan well, if it pays off, imagine the REWARDS.

Kill them. Get the accolades. Then turn around and kill your mentor too.

Who then could gainsay you? Who then could call you just a human nobody from the ass end of the empire? Those rich beautiful classmates who are now rich beautiful politicians, they bow to you. They fear you.

Ambition. 20 intelligence. High level spell slots.

The risk you're taking is calculated, and you, 20 int, are very good at math.

Here's another thing about Caleb Widogast: he has a conscience. He knows right from wrong. He broke. His friends didn't.

And then they had 15 ish years more of not breaking and not breaking and not breaking and ignoring their consciences.

Redemption? Who needs it?

And even if I did kill my parents in cold blood, so what? Now I am so much greater than they ever imagined I could be.

Maybe I'm wrong. I probably am! This dark and awful story is probably not something the cast wants to tell. They want to put redemption and forgiveness out into the world, and you know what? They're valid. There's too much extant darkness. Critical Role is a light.

But you asked for my thoughts, and here they are. I'm just saying. Don't trust the wizards.

[allthebooksandcrannies]

I know a lot of older people think it's a problem that so many young people don't want to have children, but I think it shows an increased understanding for how much of a responsibility parenting is and how much damage you can do to a child of you're not ready to raise someone.

I think that everyone is capable of being a good parent and I think that some people should never be parents. These may sound mutually exclusive but they aren't because there's a big if involved in the first half. That if, is that everyone is capable of being a good parent someday if they put in the work to take care of their own shit first.

When you become a parent or guardian, you are officially signing on to prioritize another person's physical and emotional needs before your own for the rest of their life. That means loving them no matter what they do or who they become. That means putting aside your own exhaustion and frustration at your day when they walk through the door so that you can be their champion and their confidant and their companion. That means teaching them how to process their emotions and think critically and empathetically and it means letting them find their own path, even if it's different than the one you wanted or imagined for them, but making it clear that if they need or want your comfort, your help, or just your ear that they will have it. You don't have to be perfect. No parent ever is, and it's important anyway for kids to learn in nontraumatic ways that adults make mistakes too and that's okay as long as you take responsibility for that and strive to learn and grow because of your mistakes. Kids learn by watching and listening to the adults around them and the things they conclude from those early years of observation will stick with them the rest of their lives.

I know that that sounds scary. It probably should because deciding to raise a child should be the biggest decision you can make, and if it's not, you may not be taking it seriously enough.

I also know that this is hard. And I have the greatest respect for people who truly understand this and decide to raise a tiny person anyway.

I'm also not trying to discourage you from becoming a parent. You may not be ready now, but that doesn't mean you can't be later. I personally would love to be a mom some day not I know that I have a lot of personal growth and healing I need to take care of first, to say nothing of the stabilization of my financial and career status.

The real question is what can you do to be a better parent, guardian, or even trusted adult to someone else's child (a really important and valid role and choice in itself!) later?

First off, you need to do some hard core introspection to figure out what traits and behaviors you have that might exhibit that would interfere in your ability to be a good parent. Maybe you're still emotionally immature. Maybe you're struggling with uncontrolled mental illness, chronic illness, or addiction. Maybe you've internalized some toxic ideas. Maybe you're still recovering from trauma or just now realizing that what you have even is trauma. None of these things makes you a bad person and none of them stops you from being capable to becoming a good parent. But, all of them can interfere with your ability to model healthy behaviors and coping skills to your child. Children learn through observation and, because their brains need the world to make sense and be predictable, they're going to interpret everytime you seem upset or lose your cool as being their fault. Young children aren't capable of going "mom is upset and snapped over something relatively trivial, she must be having a bad day/be tired/etc" because that's an interpretation of the world that is outside their control. Instead, they're going to go "I did x and mom got mad at me, it's my fault so I better not do x again" and that's a really harmful mindset that can contribute to self-worth issues and other mental illnesses like anxiety, especially if this happens long-term (for the record, you're going to make mistakes and you're going to snap over stupid things because being a grown-up is hard, so when you inevitably make this mistake it's important to be honest and upfront with your child about what happened, why, how it's not their fault, and you have to genuinely apologize for it, turning your mistake into a chance to model good adult behavior).

It's important to take care of yourself and let yourself grow and heal before bringing a kid into the mix because 1. you'll be a better parent if you start out in a better place emotionally and mentally, and 2. because you deserve the chance to be healthy and happy and it's much harder to address the things that are interfering with that when your also trying to juggle the additional emotional/mental demands of raising a child.

Additionally, I definitely recommend making sure you and anyone else taking a primary caretaker role in your child's life is in a stable financial and that the relationship between you and any other caretakers is stable and amicable regardless of what kind of relationship it is. The financial aspect is important because kids are expensive as hell (both the having/acquiring and the raising) and you want to be able to provide then with the best possible shot at life.

This isn't about me but I feel like the example will be helpful. We weren't poverty level growing up, but even as a child it was clear to me that we could be. My parents were 20 year old newlyweds when they got pregnant. My dad had been set up to inherit a position in his father and grandfather's construction company and did not go to college because they thought he was guaranteed a steady job. My mom was paying for a college education she couldn't afford because no one had ever explained how to get financial aid and scholarships to her and her parents were too caught up in their own shit to be anything but relieved about getting to make her future my dad's problem. Then they got pregnant. They started building a house that took much longer to build then expected because that construction business dad was expecting to inherit went out of business because it turned out that a cousin had been embezzling and my great-grandmother wouldn't let them sue or press charges against family. Mom had to drop out of college to raise me because daycare costs as much as she makes at work and she no longer has the time or funds. They had a baby they weren't prepared to raise and my dad's new job had him working in the Texas heat all day before going and working on our house at night so that we could move out of my maternal grandfather's house now that he was getting divorced and couldn't afford it. My parents society never saw each other and they were constantly worried about money. Less than two years after I was born they accidentally got pregnant with my brother. He ended up with failure to thrive and (although he did eventually recover) it raked up a serious amount of debt in addition to my mom's student loans and the mortgage. Flash forward four more years and my dad falls through a roof at a construction site and permanently cripples his ankle. Cue a year of the only breadwinner in the household being unable to work, several surgeries and massive medical bills we can't pay. A year after that my mom has to have a historectomy because her fibroids are causing immense pain and then they find pre-cancerous cells. Another year after that she starts having unexplained siezures and signs of organ failure that will take years to diagnose as a rare autoimmune disorder that will leave her disabled and, again, rake up serious medical debt. I found out in college that it came to the point that we almost lost the house but as a kid I still always knew we were struggling. And that fucks with a kid's head. There were reasons I didn't tell my parents that something was wrong for a week after I sprained my wrist when I was 10 and it wasn't just because I didn't want to sound like I was asking for attention (a phobia that also comes from having emotionally immature parents). I pushed myself ridiculously hard in school because I knew I couldn't expect any help paying for college from my parents. I still feel incredibly guilty anytime I spend more than 20 dollars even though it's my money and I need groceries or textbooks or gas or whatever. A lot of these issues would have been financially difficult and unpredictable, but had my parents been in a more stable position when they got married and started having kids, it would have been much easier to weather the storms.

Additionally, money is the main thing couples fight about, so if you can take that off the table as a significant concern before bringing kids into the mix, please do. Maslow's hierarchy of needs states that you can't address higher order concerns like personal growth of your worried about where your next meal is coming from and that goes for your children as well.

Again, I'm not trying to shame people for their financial difficulties. Most of us are playing at a game we were never intended to win and I get that not all children are planned. But, your good intentions unfortunately will not put food on the table or pay the rent and your children will have a lot less stress in their lives if you are able to make sure that things are as stable as possible before you bring them into it.

The same goes for your relationship with fellow caretakers. Don't try to have kids to save your relationship. Don't ever make your children feel like your relationship is in anyway their responsibility. Again, they need their world to make sense and if you're fighting they're probably going to assume it's somehow their fault. Don't do that to them.

Anyway, this rant turned out a lot longer than I intended but I think I needed to say it. In summary, raising children is not about you but your going to make it about you unless you take care of your own shit first. Children don't ask to be born. If you're not ready for that responsibility, either don't have kids or put in the work so that you will be. If you already have kids, and don't have your shit together, there's still time but it's going to be harder and you might have to do some damage control from any traumas you may have already inflicted on your child, regardless of your intentions. If that's the case, you have a responsibility to get your kid the help they need and do everything in your power to avoid further harm. You're the adult in this situation, and if you're going to be a parent, you need to act like it.

[christinaroseandrews]

Marketing Matters - Strategy - Fanfiction

Strategy - Fanfiction

So this is a bit of a taboo subject in the publishing world, but I’m going to be upfront with you all. 

We write fanfiction. 

There, I said it. 

Writing fanfic is also a viable marketing strategy for authors who are choosing to go the self-publishing route and not always for the reasons that immediately spring to mind.  In addition, the skills, fanbase, and tricks learned while writing fanfic can also apply to traditional publishing.  However, I’m going to give you one caveat right up front: many big name publishers don’t like authors who write fic. Or at least they say they don’t. It’s becoming more common, but most publishers and agents want authors to be focusing on original fic not fanfic. Several smaller presses don’t care as much, so long as your author persona and your fic persona are very separate and you don’t rub it in their faces.  But the big name publishers may require you to pull your fanworks. So that’s something to keep in mind.

So now it’s time to break it down.

About Us and What we’ve done:

We’re probably best known as fanfic writers in the Hunger Games fandom, where we have a few well regarded fics.  We’ve also dipped our toes into other fandoms including the MCU, Harry Potter, DBZ, and more drive-by one-shots in various fandoms than you can shake a stick at.

We also both were/are a part of the Sims 2 writing community and had a few well known stories there as well.  ^__^ We may or may not have met in this fandom. LOL

Both of us have been part of these fandoms for years and were active members in them. Lark started in fanfic back in 1994/5 as a beta reader (which she then parlayed that experience into becoming an editor that summer). While Rose discovered fic in college in 2002. In these fandom communities, we met people that we now call friends in real life as well as mentors, betas, advisers, and cheerleaders. We learned skills that apply both to fic and to original writing.  And, most importantly, we learned how to listen to our audience.

Let me stress that again: we learned to listen to our audience. 

When we transitioned, we hit up the people we met in these fandoms to help us with various aspects of publishing life (either paying or trading favors for work done) and we’ve also given status updates about our original writing, along with links to our author tumblr in the authors’ notes of our fics. Nothing that will violate the terms of Ao3′s Terms of use - but links to our professional website/social media.

While we write fanfic less, we still dip our fingers in now and again.

Cost:

Time. 

Straight up time.

The cost of writing fic is time, energy, and creativity.  Time spent writing fic is time NOT spent writing original works that can be published.  Time that is not spent editing or plotting or doing other sweat equity types of marketing. Which is why some authors refuse to write fic once they turn professional and it is completely understandable. Fanfic authors don’t get paid for their work and for some, getting paid is a big deal. Especially when most of your income comes from writing.

It’s a cost we willingly pay sometimes, but if a fanfic author you know also writes original works for publications. It does mean that updates may be slower and there is often less motivation to keep publishing stories -- especially if the stories don’t get much in the way of response/feedback.

It’s about return on investment.

Return on Investment:

I’m going to do this a little differently since sometimes the return isn’t monetary.  This is also likely to sound really clinical and analytical; that’s because I’m trying to be objective and I may be going too far the other way. We write fanfic because we love it, but that doesn’t mean that it doesn’t give back to us too.

Monetary (Language of Flowers only):

Units sold:  20

Mailing list subscribers: 6

Social media followers:  Twitter - 15, Tumblr - 60, Facebook - 8

Not Monetary but Cost Saving

Editors - 9

Cover Designers - 3

Mailing List Trades - 3

Skills Learned:

Editing (Line, Content, Story Doctoring -- Yes, all of these)

Proofreading (not the same as editing)

Creating Characters

Keeping Characters in Character

Plotting

Engaging an audience

Finishing what you start

How to handle ConCrit

How to handle Trolls

How to write to an audience

How to prevent plot holes

As you can see, the biggest return on investment of the time is in the skills section. Fanfiction is not to be taken lightly.

And as for me, Lark, I literally parlayed my experience working in fandom to actual paying jobs as an editor. I honed my skills as an editor on fanfic which I then turned around and used to get a job editing professionally. I did that multiple times for a bunch of different publishers/clients. I got my start in fanfic.

As an editor, one of the biggest problems I see with developing authors is a “sameness” in voice. AKA all of the characters sound the same.  If you want to see this in traditionally published book action, then look at Laurel K. Hamilton... Her Merry Gentry and Anita Blake heroines sound almost exactly the same. (Which not coincidentally, sounds like how she speaks in real life.)

With fanfiction, you can’t do that. You’ll get called out for being OOC. So you have to learn to adapt your voice. (Or only write characters that sound like you but that gets boring after a while.)

So in my actual job as an editor, one I get paid to do, I legitimately tell my clients to pick a character from a show they like and use them as a template for a character they’re having trouble giving a good character voice to. And unsurprisingly, it works. It’s a good trick and it subconsciously teaches your brain how to create different characters/voices.

They other HUGE takeaway from the skills is in regards to concrit and being able to take it. If you want to publish for a living and not just half-ass it, you have to develop a thick-ish skin. And fanfiction can help with that. I straight up learned to deal with harsh reviews from writing fanfiction. But more importantly, I learned how to listen to what the person was telling me and then become a better author because of it.

In fanfiction, unlike in the publishing world, the reviews are meant for the authors... not potential readers. If someone really hates your work, or worse, is apathetic to it. They just won’t comment. They’ll hit the backspace and you’ll never hear anything. Most comments, especially critical ones, are from people who legitimately like the story that you’re telling but have a problem with part of it. The comment may be harsh, it may even be mean. But it tells you something and it gives you an idea where you may be turning off readers. People aren’t always good at phrasing criticism constructively. We’re not really trained how to do that. But when someone tells you why something isn’t working for them or why they didn’t like something, listen. You don’t have to agree -- we certainly haven’t -- but listening and thinking critically about the feedback will help.

This can be seen in our first novel, The Language of Flowers, which started out its life as a fanfic. The story pissed several readers off. And we realized as we were writing it that we needed to explain something and we weren’t doing a good job of doing so. So the scene that every single one of our readers loved was born of that concrit. Our story is better and reached the top 100 in its categories on Amazon because of the feedback we got as fanfic authors.

Seriously, writing fanfic has gotten us to where we are today.

Takeaways:

My biggest take away is that writing fanfic is a great skills builder and audience builder.

Pros:

Skills. Oh so many skills. But the biggest is that you will be writing and no writing is ever wasted. It’s practice. Like an artist has to sketch or a musician practice. You’re honing and toning your writing muscles. And fanfic is absolutely valid for doing that.

Cons:

Time. Straight up Time.

Rating:

It’s been so long since I’ve done one of these that I don’t remember. But honestly, the rating varies. You get out of fanfic what you put in and what you’re willing to take from it.

(Note: This has been sitting in our drafts for about 4 years. I finally finished it up because I was bored and waiting to go to a doctor and didn’t feel like doing nothing.)

If you like our marketing posts, please consider supporting us here!

[mikiruma]

I'M CLOSING TWITTER FOR THE NIGHT JESUS CHRIST ANYWAY I'M JUST GONNA INFODUMP UNDER THE CUT BECAUSE I'M GOING APE

HI I SPENT ALL DAY WANTING TO/STARTING TO WATCH TOTAL DRAMA SEASONS 4 AND 5 BECAUSE I WANTED TO SEE MIKE&.... AND MOOMOO DECIDED TO WATCH WITH ME BECAUSE THEY BINGED TDI SOMEWHAT RECENTLY..... AND IT TURNED INTO ME PERIODICALLY PAUSING TO TALK ABOUT OUR OWN SYSTEM AND COMPARING MIKE&'S WITH OURS SO AN 8 HOUR EVENT TURNED INTO AN ALMOST (CHECKS TIME) 12 HOUR ONE..... they went to bed a while ago so i'm finishing s5 by myself.... and it was cool because i know now they're wanting to get to know the others and ask questions and be involved(!!!!) BUT ALSO i know mike& in general is a controversial character.... but as someone who sort of relates to the internal conflict in a weird way or has this being our first time witnessing someone with DID have their alters identities respected and not being treated like a complete weirdo for being plural... i mean there's the mistreatment a la chris and scott triggering a switch intentionally to help himself in a competition.... but other than that!!! and the ending to s5 which i have not reached but spoiled myself with because i wanted to know what i was getting into before i started!!!! i'm legit falling in love with these guys and want to see them go places and it makes me appreciate the one fanwork i've seen rewriting them a bit even MORE...... also i know mal is the most stereotypical/worst rep of anything, for having a persecutor and knowing their roles i SHOULD be saying it's a little singlet bait-y and knowing they added him in the story as the main villain because they knew that's what people would have wanted to see instead of a system achieving healthy functional plurality.... but he reminds me a lot of our persecutor and how they acted back in the day, we haven't entirely patched up and they still have stumbling blocks sometimes but after getting to know them and realizing they're acting in good faith (even if the good faith is spelled out with self-sabotage), i just have a feeling maybe i need to psychoanalyze mal. ESPECIALLY because of mike (and to an extent the show) treating his headmates like EXTRAS instead as other fully fleshed people (at least in s4, though they got their moments to talk to each other and cooperate) and taking control/acting like the others were getting in his way of *his life*.... and mal being the host before but being locked away and having to force his way out and rule with an iron fist before he was given any mind.... that guy needs a hug. and everyone else (MIKE ESPECIALLY) may need to learn how to communicate better. mal just needs to feel important and get attention when he's doing things that AREN'T being mean or acting out.... also i think i just want to give mal a hug in general. not saying mike is the real villain of s5 but i AM saying when he was working with everyone to overthrow mal, they were very clear that mike being in charge, while better, was still not the best because they get pushed aside and not taken seriously.... so i think if they just went to therapy or TALKED TO EACH OTHER (I KNOW THEY CAN!!!! THEY HAVE A HEADSPACE THEY HANG OUT IN!!!!! IF MIKE WAS ONLY ABLE TO ACCESS IT BY THE COMPETITION NOW'S A GOOD TIME TO GET YOUR WORDS IN!!!!!) then it would have been a MILES better solution than. PERMANENT INTEGRATION AND CHOOSING TO CURE THEIR OWN DISORDER ALL BY THEMSELVES WITH NO HELP BY PUSHING A BUTTON IN THEIR BRAIN JUST TO GET RID OF ONE GUY THEY DIDN'T WANT TO TALK TO!!!!!!!!!!!! oh my god also i just want to mention i know svetlana was trying to be nice and encouraging saying they needed mike because he's better at some things than some of the other headmates but..... that coupling with the integration...... kind of hammers it in that everyone sees themselves as "extra" :( it makes me want to be more conscious of how i think/talk about OUR headmates because i want to try and make everyone feel welcome and valid.....

anyway sorry for the text wall i just love these guys so much but i HATE THE WRITING and i'm stalling finishing the s5 finale because i know they're going to do it and it's going to piss me off so much and i love ALL of them and want them to be ok..... it's hard for me to criticize much else because i can see us a lot in these guys and how things run.... and i'm disappointed they didn't show much else of mike& purely because i was watching the seasons just for them so everything else felt like filler.... IT WAS ENTERTAINING I JUST.... want to see more of them but WITH THE CORRECT DIAGNOSTIC NAME AND SEVERAL THERAPY TRIPS LATER LOL.....

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edit: finished!!! SO! mal admitting he was pushing people away so they didn't have the chance to hurt them first. the others saying integration wasnt getting RID of anyone, just making them a fuller singular person. GUYS I'M SOBBING.... i KNEW mal was doing the typical persecutor song and dance but with the way he even threw around his baggage like it was NOTHING. still upset at the integration since everyone was more willing to cease existing as they were altogether just so mal wouldn't be the host.... it breaks my heart.... ALSO I'M STILL OVER THE MOON ABOUT GIVING THEM A HEADSPACE AND THE LITTLE DETAILS IN THERE!!!! i legit don't know any other media featuring systems that INCLUDED that!!!!! god y'all the end of the system era was pretty disappointing but it just made me think of the guys i'm living with. i know i wasn't a perfect host and was definitely a control freak when i first discovered i was part of them, and every day i try to make that right.... so this just reminded me of those times in awareness infancy where i was like. ok but i'm the one who fronts the most so i must be the real one!!! obviously not true anymore because julian's the host now, i mean i'm still real but knowing that logic is pretty busted... hehehe.... even realizing i was only the host for a handful of years up to that point was a shock!!! but retroactively trying to work things through with everyone and getting us to a functional place despite not being able to see a therapist about it yet... this was weirdly heartwarming in a way? seeing the headmates in their natural habitat, just chilling. seeing them get into internal conflict. dissociation periods used as windows into their mind. mike starting as insisting he was the one in control and who SHOULD be in control, even willing to abandon everyone for zoey, but going to being the least willing to integrate because he would miss everyone and valued their existence.... i know they can only fit so much development in 20 min episodes of a show thats supposed to focus on multiple people (non-systems at least) so i think their story was cramped in that aspect, but if it were a more serious non-reality show focusing more on mike& in general it would have been WAY smoother. but like. i understand the shorthand and can see the allusions and whatnot. i know what they were trying to do. and i LOVE it. it's not perfect but this is the first time i watched something in a good while that felt like it encapsulated ANYTHING close to my personal experiences being in a system and being the disgruntled host, and seeing a little bit of my closest comrades in mike's headmates was just icing on the cake. :) i think the only thing i would have liked better was if instead of an integration they either agreed to work together and be more functional/rehabilitate mal, or if someone new split entirely to act as the mediator.. idk total drama is pretty stressful!! it's the right environment for it!!! and especially the inner system conflict!!! i don't know i think after all that, they needed someone to be the impartial third party to help settle conflicts and junk... just my onion though

[no-footprints-in-the-snow]

The Pennywise Saga: Purging, Presents, and Predictable

TRIGGER WARNING: Discussion of disordered eating, and eating disorders.

Well, I figured things would go moderately smoothly because it was the first meeting in 8/9 months. And it did. We were kind, grey rocked, and they were kind. The restaurant we ended up going to didn't have any really healthy options, it was unfortunate, but that was my fault. It was me who chose it because it was the first one that came to mind.

Pennywise suffers from an eating disorder. We all know it. She eats a quarter of a meal, and sends it back. Hides food in her napkin. Plays with her food. Sends it back for too much dressing. She constantly berates the waitress, or tells the waitress to talk to the chef about what's wrong with the meal.

I've been doing Intermittent Fasting. I've lost 75lbs. I've been very mindful of my eating, but I've also gone overboard at many points. Fasting for 20 days straight (still taking vitamins, supplements, electrolytes, only drinking black coffee, water, and green tea). It took telling my doctor telling me that I may end up with hair loss for me to stop. My hair is the only thing I truly think is beautiful about me. It's the one thing Pennywise has always loved, too. Despite it being an auburn during the winter, and a ginger tone during the summer months – she had dyed my hair dark brown since I was nine or so to make me look more like the rest of the family. It took until I was 29 or so to stop the habit.

I carried on like this though and still have been doing this. Restricting harder and harder, fasting for 3-5 days twice a month, and even purging. Eating 300 calories or less a day. Exercising excessively despite my bad ankle (more metal than bone). Wearing a brace so that I can get in 20,000 steps. Now with the brown recluse bite on my upper, inner thigh, I've taken some time off, so as not to irritate the area (at my doctor's advice). Anyway, some doctors say that disordered eating is hereditary in a way. Monkey see, monkey do, I guess. I struggle with it immensely.

I've lost 75lbs / 34kg since mid-December. I quit drinking, ordering out, and did all the above. I was actually kind of excited to show off my weight loss, because she would be... proud. It's weird how the brain, despite knowing, despite being told that she's a narc, despite years of mistreatment, or buying 'goal clothes' for me for every birthday and Christmas ever since I was nine or so. If you don't know what 'goal clothes' are, they're clothes that are sizes too small so that you have to lose weight to fit into them. The only thing that ever fit me was shoes. However, she knew that I'd lost 75lbs, as I was rather proud of that fact, and had texted her about it. She couldn't respond because I had and still have all their numbers blocked, but I wanted to brag a little.

First comment when Pennywise saw me was,

"You look the same as when we saw you last time. I thought you said you lost weight."

It crushed me instantly.

We just continued on, I said nothing, smiled through it, and said our hellos. And of course, in the way my family does, we did our one-armed hugs (and air kisses to the one cheek for the women) -- we have very strict conduct of how we touch one another in our family. We stood our ground and did not allow either of them into the house. Pennywise did ask why she couldn't wait in the house, despite the rules being laid out in plain English the day before. I wouldn't have let her in even if she had to pee. I'd have let her piss herself before I let her in our home. We gave them their Christmas presents, and they gave us ours to take home later on, and headed to the restaurant.

When the waitress came, we all ordered. Pennywise asked for the fries that came with her meal to be put on a separate plate. Only… she didn't. Four times in a row, she asked for gravy to be put on a separate plate. When the waitress looked confused and asked,

"You want gravy on the side?" Pennywise looked confused and my father had to say,

"She means fries. She wants her fries on a separate plate."

Pennywise looking confused, countered with,

"That's what I said."

We all looked at her and shook our heads. She still looked confused, but the waitress accepted it, and we carried on. Perhaps Pennywise is starting to... I don't know. It was almost like a moment of aphasia.

In typical habit, I ordered knowing Pennywise would be watching what I ate. I ordered the 'Lunch Rush' without the soup, just the small salad and half a sandwich.

Only, she didn't watch what I ate.

Today, for the first time in my ENTIRE life (and the ENTIRE time that my husband has known her), she didn't send her food back, hide it in her napkin, and nearly finished everything on her plate. When we got home, I commented on how she actually ate. And even my husband noticed that she actually ate.

It was… Intriguing to watch. To see her actually eat. I know that sounds strange, but after so many years of watching her disordered eating -- it was just... kind of mind-blowing. She didn't watch what I ate. AND she ate. It was... a little confusing and intriguing to BE the one watching instead of being watched.

Then Pennywise discussed how her surgery was coming up, and discussed the nitty-gritty details of it. She spoke while we listened, and that was that.

Of course, she opened her Christmas present when we got back to the car. I got her handmade moccasins from the Native reservation because she always buys herself new ones from a store in the mall.  I thought she'd appreciate the real thing.

The beautiful handmade moccasins I got her from the reservation didn't fit – but I expected that – I got them in my size and for myself (she insists we're the same size - we're not). Nothing I buy her is ever good enough anyway, so I simply planned ahead this time. They wouldn't fit her, or she wouldn't like them, and I'd have to return them. Call me selfish if you want, but she's returned every gift I've gotten her since… well, honestly, I can't remember the last time I got her a gift she kept. So this time, I just planned ahead.

We left after giving them directions, doing our one-armed hugs, and went our own ways. It's not that exciting of a story. I think that Pennywise is suffering from the early signs of dementia. I don’t know how I feel about that. I feel despair. I feel anger that she’ll never remember all the horrible things she did to me. That she’ll never apologize. That her first words to me were to mock my weight despite being 75lbs lighter. I feel sad. I feel some weird form of elation -- that maybe she’ll forget me entirely, and I won’t have to worry about her anymore. Sympathy that she’s got cancer, and clearly showing the signs of dementia. My heart is breaking, and yet... I don’t know. I don’t know HOW to feel. I’m crying as I write this last part out because the emotions are so confusing. I always wished she would just disappear. That my troubles would... go away and distancing myself from my family made my troubles fade. But the fact that she’s actually fading away. That she may not make it through this... I feel... Confused. Broken. Validated. Vindictive. Heartbroken. It was like I made a wish, and it... came true, in the worst way possible. I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy or critic, and Pennywise is both of those things. This is not closure. This is not... a happy ending. This is just... an ending, in a way. It’s not over yet, and I’m over-analytical and hypervigilant from years of abuse and protecting myself. I’m still working out my feelings and they are just -gestures vaguely- all over the place. I don’t know how I should feel. When I first found out she had cancer, I just felt... numb. I felt like I should care more. But seeing her face-to-face, and seeing her fading away. Only a glimpse of the woman she’s always been at the beginning of her visit, before she became docile and suffered aphasia with her speech. It... broke me. In a way I can’t explain. Today has been an awful day, really. My emotions are... everywhere, and I can’t grasp any one feeling for long before it morphs into something else.

[bettsfic]

I got ice cream with a friend and her boyfriend today (we social distanced, I promise), and we hung out for like, three hours just chatting, jumping from topic to topic as we would. I'm not saying it was all deep shit, but it has me thinking about how there's a difference between small talk and normal talk, where normal talk for me is word vomit (and the resulting conversation), not struggling to ask pointed questions that will lead to more questions and thus, conversing. (1/2?)

Anyways, all this is to say that when I sit and talk with some friends, they're brushing me out after an hour (it's like clockwork--I could actually almost time it to that exactly), and when that happens, I'm often left feeling like I don't actually KNOW the friend because we cannot have full out word-vomit conversations where we meander to the topics that matter to both of us, we have to feel things out in a limited time without ever reaching Conclusions. Any advice to combat this? (2/2)

Also thank you for letting me word vomit in your inbox. And also letting me randomly message you all the time. I love and appreciate you even though I feel like I've never had the opportunity to get to know you nearly well enough for all this. Please tell me random stories about yourself at random intervals if you are comfortable with such things. I like knowing these sorts of things about the people in my shared universe.

unfortunately i don’t think there’s any way to combat it, or if there is i haven’t learned it. if i’m around people with whom i can’t talk writing, teaching, or pop culture, i’m basically lost. i have no idea who i am or what to say, and those situations can sometimes send me into a spiral. i consider myself a socially adept person, but i don’t generally like talking about myself (not because of insecurity or anything, i just think it’s a boring subject, because i already know who i am), and whenever people try to have “deep” conversations with me, i mostly end up unwittingly playing therapist, or getting dragged into sociopolitical debates with people who lack compassion and critical thinking.

in my early 20s, i picked up on the idea that sometimes i was around people and it drained me, and around other people i felt fulfilled, and i started noting when and why it happened. over time i distanced myself from people whose company i felt took something from me, even if i really liked them as people, and grew closer to people who made me feel good about myself. i also prided myself on my wide and varied social circle, and that i had social engagements every day. needless to say, when i gave up on that endeavor, i wasn’t left with many friends, but the ones i have are good ones, and we word-vomit at each other comfortably, and offer the reassurance and validation we are all always seeking, and because i have the security of their friendship, it’s far less exhausting to be around other kinds of people than it used to be.

also i’ve found as people get older, they get more settled in who they are, and better at being sincere, and become better listeners too. i’m always surprised how easy it is to make connections now and find kindness and patience in others, when in my teens and even most of my 20s i always felt, as you say, brushed out. (the opposite side of this coin, however, is that people are also steadier in their existing primary relationships, and so while those connections you build are real, balanced, and mutually appreciated, they often don’t grow, and staying in touch becomes harder.)

i miss you and i hope you’re doing well in all the madness of this year <33

[enthusiasticmusicalquotes]

QUESTION OF THE DAY #6: Send me your most unpopular theatre opinion. Something that might make someone want to fight you. Please don’t be offensive (racist, misogynistic, etc.), but other than that…go as hard as you want. Spill all the tea.

MY ANSWERS: 1) The Pretty Woman score fucking slaps idek, 2) Come From Away (or even Bandstand...) should’ve won the 2017 Best Musical Tony, 3) I prefer the West End Heathers cast album to Off Broadway, 4) Shows shouldn’t sweep the Tonys just because they’re Best Musical worthy...shows that aren’t too critically acclaimed but have really impressive elements should get recognition too.

SUMMARY: Out of 37 responses: 5 were about Dear Evan Hansen, 3 were about Hamilton specifically, 2 were about: Rent, ALW, Wicked, In The Heights, Be More Chill, etc. etc....if your favorite musical is one of these and you get easily offended i wouldn’t read these.

NOTE: I agree with some of these, I highly disagree with others. I do not endorse any of the things that were said, I am simply sharing them with you all. These were what was sent to me. I’m going to number them so if you want to complain about or agree with one you can send me an ask with the number you’re referring to. 

1. howmuchchildrens said: unpopular opinion: i really liked the 2012 version of les mis. i liked russel crowe as javert.

2. Anonymous said: Unpopular opinion: Bootlegs harm to local theatre communities, though I do not believe anyone intends for that to be the case. While it's possible to bootleg responsibly (and I might even say it's beneficial to do so), those who may not know the intricacies of theatrical copyright law or who haven't heard the horror stories from a theatre that's been hit with legal action DUE to a bootleg may record or watch a show irresponsibly, which can greatly harm other routes of theatre accessibility.

3. Anonymous said: Andrew Lloyd Webber musicals are mostly terrible. He only got and stayed popular because a lot of other musical creators and taste makers died in the AIDS epidemic

4. Anonymous said: Almost all musicals using the songs of one artist are cash grabs with no plot or point.

5. Anonymous said: If your musical only has 1 woman OR the women only get sad/romantic songs you need to do something else with your life.

6. nerdshrimp said: Unpopular opinion: Next To Normal does a better job of portraying the effects of mental illness than Dear Evan Hansen does. N2N also doesn't romanticise mental illness & excuse shitty behavior like DEH tries to

7. Anonymous said: Hadestown is a lesser show on Broadway. I fell in love with the live album, and I was so excited for it to come to Broadway. I was so disappointed to see the changes they made. Orpheus and Eurydice's relationship is less interesting and more generic. The changed lyrics are often sloppy and not as good as the original. They fucking wrecked Epic III. Also, no hate to R/ee/ve, but he's just not a good enough singer to convince me that he could soften the heart of Hades. His high notes are awful.

8. Anonymous said: opinion: we are the tigers deserves a broadway run or at least a proshot

9. bimystique said: e/c is NOT A GOOD FUCKING SHIP. the ENTIRE PLOT OF PHANTOM OF THE OPERA is christine trying to escape erik's abuse. WHAT FUCKING PART OF THAT IS ROMANTIC TO YOU PEOPLE.

10. Anonymous said: unpopular theatre opinion(s): Dear Evan Hansen is Very Bad for its handling of mental illness, Hamilton is overrated and praised too much, and high school/college musical theatre programs can be just as good as Broadway. (also, musical movies would be better if they hired broadway actors, but that's not an unpopular opinion)

11. Anonymous said: I don’t like Lin Manuel Miranda and Hamilton is overrated

12. Anonymous said: I don’t like dear Evan Hansen..... at all. I think it’s kind of boring and really overhyped.

13. Anonymous said: unpopular opinion: in the heights is far better than Hamilton. both are good but ith hits different yknow

14. Anonymous said: The bring it on and legally blonde musicals are BAD! The movies are 100 times better

15. Anonymous said: unpopular opinion? wicked is the epitome of white feminism. it's preached as super great for representation but we literally got the first black glinda in 2019?!?!?!? and before that woc could only play elphaba who's villainized and deemed evil by the whole city

16. Anonymous said: Not so much an opinion as a reaction, but of all Lin's works (ITH, Bring it On, 21 Chump Street, Hamilton), 21 Chump Street gets the biggest emotional reaction of all the cast recordings. The second Justin is like "I don't want your money" (And then later on with the "...what the heck did you.... dooooo", I am a complete goner. Worse than Abuela Claudia and Philip Hamilton's deaths combined

17. Anonymous said: Whenever Je.ssie Mu.eller hits certain notes, she sounds like Tommy Pickles from Rugrats.

18. Anonymous said: aotd6: not everyone knows what im talking about, but the cats 2016 broadway revival choreography was WAYYYY better than the original. the original had a lot of creepy uncomfortable moments and the new one looks way cleaner and up to date

19. Anonymous said: raoul is better than the phantom in every conceivable way

20. Anonymous said: I hate Anastasia so much. it's such a boring show and the music is uninteresting. I wanted to like it so bad but GOD is it boring.

21. Anonymous said: In the Heights.... Overrated.

22. Anonymous said: I do not know if this is an unpopular opinion or not, but here is my opinion: Musicals that are entirely or nearly entirely songs (Hamilton, Hadestown, In The Heights, etc) are the most valid bc I can understand the plot without using wikipedia (I'm looking at you, Jagged Little Pill, I love you but what is your plot????)

23. Anonymous said: I'd rather have a bad film adaptation than no film adaptation

24. Anonymous said: Rent sucks and while it was a stepping stone for more ""controversial"" topics to appear on Broadway it's actually biphobic and features several generally terrible people doing generally terrible things and doesn't actually address the real crisis at all; it's all performative wokeness. The only real good it did was cast a bunch of "nobodies" for the time and make theater somewhat more accessible.

25. stardust-and-seas said: Dear Evan Hansen doesn't properly address mental health despite being about mental health and resolves nobodies character arcs satisfactorily. It's another show that reaches its hands around the throats of marginalized teenagers saying "look I'm relatable!!" The songs taken out of context are significantly more powerful than when placed in the context of the show, which gives us exactly zero evidence of Evan's work to improve and also never resolves Evan's u healthy goals in the first place.

26. stardust-and-seas said: Be More Chill is a raging dumpster fire and the only decent song from it, Michael in the Bathroom, reads as a whiny rich white boy whose potential social anxiety and depression is left ambiguous, which is exactly what it is. When taken out of context it better exemplifies the othering that happens to marginalized groups but lets be real here: bullying/cliques don't happen to "just anyone"; it's the marginalized groups that are othered and abandoned for not being "normal"

27. stardust-and-seas said: There's a difference between shows that don't take themselves seriously because they're meant to be fun and light and shows that pretend not to take themselves too seriously but want to be taken seriously by the audience and the latter always ends up mediocre at best

28. redueka said: i think that dear evan hansen handles every issue it presents badly. i also think that beetlejuice was badly directed

29. Anonymous said: Well I don’t EVER condone cheating, I’m team Jamie in the last five years. He tried so hard to make their relationship and life good, and Cathy gave him nothing in return

30. youcanlolyoucansayohwell said: The answer of the day- I don't get the BMC hype. I'm out of the age bracket it's meant for that might it be. I enjoy it but I don't think it's the greatest thing in the world like some theatre fans do.

31. Anonymous said: i like the rent 2005 recording better than the obcr

32. Anonymous said: unpopular opinion ? : the music of wicked just like isn’t that good. like it’s good but it’s not like, Good, yknow. it’s pretty standard it doesn’t stand out to me. kinda boring

33. Anonymous said: mari.ah r.ose fa.ith is not a good regina george. everything she says sounds monotonous and while i understand she's trying to play off the ""whatever"" teenager (she does this a lot with her teenage characters), 90% of the time she sounds and looks like she doesn't want to be there; her voice is great but most songs feel unnatural and forced and she changes them too much. she's just not selling regina to me as a believable character (this is all from a technical point of view)

34. Anonymous said: Unpopular Opinion: as much as i like musicals based on movies (like waitress), i think not every movie needs to be a musical.

35. Anonymous said: Unpopular opinion (?) the emojiland musical Kinda Slaps

36. Anonymous said: as one of my high school tech theatre teachers once said: "Andrew Lloyd Webber is overrated"

37. Anonymous said: sorry to whoever likes it but Seussical is an absolutely nonsense crackpot plot disguised with okay-to-good music, like I don't even know where to start. I was in the show and didn't even know there was an entire secondary plot line featuring sending children to war until we were halfway through rehearsals

[mtvswatches]

10 Things I Hate About You

Obligatory soundtrack 

1) The late 90s/early 00s were filled with contemporary adaptations of Shakespeare’s plays - Julia Stiles starred in three of those, coincidentally - but, in my opinion, none has been more iconic than 10 Things I Hate About You. It’s been over 20 years since the movie was released, and it’s certainly become a teen/rom-com classic. It’s definitely a feel-good movie, and even though it obviously had great source material to work with, it did so in such a unique and fun way. And it was kind of woke for its time, too.

Disclaimer: I am a bit afraid this whole review will turn into me taking screenshots of the movie and just writing “iconic.” You’ve been fairly warned.

Anyway, let’s get into it!

3) I really love how they managed the “show, don’t tell” technique with Kat’s introduction. Her first scene really shows who she is – a jaded, kind of rebellious teenager, who marches to the beat of her own drum. Or to the beat of Joan Jett’s drum…

She’s shown as the opposite of the other girls, but it doesn’t feel like a criticism of the other girls' more cheerful, sunny disposition. We very quickly learn what she is like, but we have yet to find out why.

4) The next characters we meet are Cameron and the school’s guidance counselor. Cameron is the new student and the guidance counselor is just…

I love her. And Allison Janney proves how talented an actress she is by making the token counselor character both memorable and unique.

5) We also meet Patrick Verona, the resident Bad Boy who had “exposed himself” in the cafeteria. Oh, Heath Ledger, you are truly missed!

6) Michael Eckman  shows Cameron around and he basically delivers the token “school cliques scene”, and since I’m not American, I’ve always wondered if this is a real thing in schools? Like, are there really so many cliques that are so visually different from one another? Each group dressing in a particular style and hanging out at a specific spot? Anyhow, the cliques here are the beautiful people (or rather, the assholes), the coffee kids (?), the white Rastas (or white stoners), the cowboys (?), and the yuppies.

7) Michael’s tour gets cut short when Cameron spots Bianca, and he’s instantly infatuated with her. I’ve always found it hard to root for Cameron at first because I’m not really a fan of insta-love, and he ends up doing A LOT of shady things for a girl who he doesn’t know AT ALL. But more on that later. In fact, the movie kind of makes a point of how ridiculous it is for Cameron to be in instant-love with Bianca by having her deliver this little lecture on love:

BIANCA: Yeah, but see, there's a difference between like and love. Because I like my Skechers, but I love my Prada backpack.

CHASTITY: But I love my Skechers.

BIANCA: That's because you don't have a Prada backpack.

Bianca clearly grows a lot over the course of the movie, but it’s clear that Cameron was in love with her appearance and not her brains or personality, which makes his quest to sweep her off her feet misguided at best.

8) And then Michael presents the main plot point…

The question then is, how is Cameron going to get the girl? It’s his quest to get a date with Bianca that creates a domino effect that brings all the characters together. 

9) See what I mean? ICONIC!

And can I say that I just love Kat? Not only is she smart, but also, she didn’t take any bullshit from anyone, especially not males. She was a feminist before being a feminist was cool. And she does grow a lot. 

10) Okay, two things, A) I love Mr. Morgan, and B) foreshadowing? Sort of?

11) Iconic.

12) Michael seems to have a lot of preconceptions about Bianca – and most of them were kind of accurate, at least at the start of the film. She was kind of vapid and shallow and self-absorbed. For someone who believes that Bianca is not only completely out of Cameron’s league but also not worthy, he does get very involved in trying to get Bianca to date Cameron.

13) This is one of my favorite lines in the movie, probably because it sounds a lot like Buffyspeak…

14) This is so random…

And the movie does have a lot of these little moments of slapstick comedy that almost seem to belong to a different type of movie, but for some reason, they work?

15) And this reminds me of the Veronica Mars of yore, the one I used to love…

16) We meet Cat and Bianca’s dad, and he is very overbearing at first, but he truly grows on you once you understand where all his rules are coming from. And of course, he establishes The Rule, which sets off the movie’s shenanigans – Bianca cannot date unless Kate does.

17) Bianca does prove a lot of Michael’s preconceptions right during her interaction with Cameron, who asks her out on a date, and even though he has been tutoring her she can’t remember his name and after he reminds her of it, she calls him “Curtis.” Bianca very clearly sees in Cameron the solution to her dating problem, and she very obviously manipulates him when it’s clear she’s not interested in dating him. She’ll get him to do the dirty work, and then let Joey rip the rewards. On the one hand, this is wrong. On the other hand, Cameron sort of had it coming? He was only interested in Bianca because of her looks, and he was about to manipulate Kat with total disregard for her feelings, so...

18) So Michael and Cameron set out to find a match for scary Kat. And what do you know…?

They figure the only way to convince Patrick to date Kat is by paying him, except they don’t have any money. So they turn to Joey, who gladly agrees to invest if it means this will get her Bianca.

19) Patrick and Joey strike a deal, and let me tell you, this deal never made any sense to me? Like, after some bargaining Joey agrees to pay Patrick 50 dollars? And I might be daft but how would Patrick be making a profit here? If he took her out, he’d be spending most of that on the date, making the whole thing pointless if he’s not making a profit? And Joey was supposed to be loaded, so why not offer more than that, to begin with?

20) I really love how Patrick assumed all he’d need to do was say hello and Kat would be at his feet, and she gloriously turned him down and put him in his place. He tries again the next day and he gets turns down, again. And I can’t blame her, he was acting like an entitled douchebag and assuming she’d want to jump his bones only because he was hot and asking her to go out, like that’s all it’d take.

21) And Joey gets a little bit of what’s coming to him…

22) This leads to Kat getting into an argument with her dad, making a lot of valid points…

WALTER: Is this about Sarah Lawrence? Are you punishing me because I want you to stay close to home? KAT: Aren't you punishing me because Mom left? WALTER: You think you could leave her out of this? KAT: Fine. Then stop making my decisions for me. WALTER: I'm your father. That's my right. KAT: So what I want doesn't matter. WALTER: You're 18. You don't know what you want. And you won't know what you want till you're 45, and even if you get it, you'll be too old to use it. KAT: I want to go to an east coast school! I want you to trust me to make my own choices... and I want you to stop trying to control my life just because you can't control yours!

I can see both sides of this argument, though. He wasn’t punishing her because her mom left, I think he was just afraid they’ll get hurt again and that’s why he was so overprotective. And Kat had just crashed her car on purpose, so I really don’t understand how she managed to turn the whole thing against her father?

23) Patrick renegotiates the terms of his agreement with Joey, demanding a 100 bucks per date. He can’t have had getting something for Kat as his goal at this point, but I think he was just trying to screw Joey over as much as possible, which kudos to him.

24) Michael and Cameron approach Patrick and inform him that they’re actually the masterminds behind this date-Kat plan, and they agree to help him woo her. And I get that Kat was not the most agreeable person to begin with, but it’s still very disheartening to see that literally no one considered her feelings in this whole thing? Like, all of them were so proud they were playing Joey, but she was the one getting played the worst? And Bianca even allows Cameron to go inside Kat’s room and go through all her private things? Everyone was an asshole in this movie, is all I’m saying.

25)

26) And then…

Probably in spite of herself, he managed to get through her shell a little bit.

27) Bianca finally begs her sister to go to the party so that she can go, and what do you know? Kat does have a heart after all, and she agrees to show.

28) Which leads to…

29) Kat seems very happy to see Patrick at her door, although she quickly puts the bitch rest-face back on and pretends his keeping his word and coming to get her did not affect her at all…

30) So, now that she got to the party and gets to hang out with Joey, Bianca demands her sister do not address her in public, and I’m like, wtf?! Kat then begs her to listen, and again, Bianca shrugs her off and tells her to go off and “enjoy her adolescence”, which pisses Kat off and probably hurts her, too. So she decides to enjoy her adolescence the way everyone seems to do, getting trashed and embarrassing themselves.

31) Further evidence that Bianca was, indeed, an asshole… Cameron is the reason she got to go out at all – after he pulled off this elaborate plan to get her sister a date – and she manipulated him by feigning to be interested in him, and now…

But karma is a bitch because Joey might be the most popular boy in school – god knows why! – but he’s as dull as dishwater, and she quickly finds herself regretting her decision to brush Cameron off in favor of Joey.

32) Meanwhile, Kat is truly enjoying her adolescence…

And thank god Patrick was there to catch her because if he hadn’t, I don’t think anyone would’ve helped her.

33) I really love Patrick’s pep talk to Cameron…

CAMERON: It's off, okay? The whole thing's off. PATRICK: What are you talking about? CAMERON: She never wanted me. She wanted Joey the whole time. PATRICK: Cameron, do you like the girl? CAMERON: Yeah. PATRICK: And is she worth all this trouble? CAMERON: I thought she was, but, you know, l... PATRICK: Well, she is or she isn't. See, first of all, Joey is not half the man you are. Secondly, don't let anyone ever make you feel like you don't deserve what you want.

34) And Patrick taking care of drunk Kat is the sweetest thing ever…

35) Of course, now that Bianca no longer wants to hang out with Joey and her friend leaves her high and dry, she asks Cameron for a ride home.

36) On the way home, Kat actually opens up to Patrick, a lot. She admits she’d love to play in a band, and that her father wants her to be someone she’s not – her sister. Patrick admits that he doesn’t really get what everyone sees in Bianca, and Kat delivers what’s probably the greatest compliment you could get from her…

She puts herself out there… and gets shut down. Of course, Patrick was probably feeling remorse about the way he’d gotten to know this girl and the way he’d been playing her because now that he’d gotten to know her a little bit better, he could see that behind that badass façade she was extremely vulnerable and sensitive. Kat feels rejected and humiliated, and who can blame her? He’d been relentlessly pursuing her, and now that she’d opened up to him and offered to kiss him, he’d turned her down…

Anyway, Patrick’s behavior, later on, makes no sense after the way he acted here, but more on that further below.

37) Cameron finally confronts Bianca about her manipulative behavior, and to her credit, she is honest and owns up to being selfish when he calls her on it. And I guess she finally sees he’s worth it…

38)

39) This exchange is so silly and hilarious?

Like, Cameron’s answer seems silly, but what type of answer was Patrick expecting? Where could she have possibly kissed him? On the knees?

40) Kat is clearly not yet over the rejection…

41) See what I mean about the jokes in this movie?

And they just look over and go on talking, as if she hadn’t just nailed her teacher on the ass with an arrow...

42) Joey goes to Patrick yet again and offers 200 dollars to get him to take Kat to the prom. Patrick tells him he’s sick of this game, and Joey ups the ante and offers him 300 dollars, which Patrick somewhat begrudgingly takes. I just would really like to know if it was at this point that he thought he’d used this dirty money to buy something for Kate. Otherwise, he was still being a jerk...

43) This scene just gives me butterflies, okay?

And as charming as he is, Kat is still not over the humiliation of putting herself out there and being rejected.

44) Cameron returns the favor and gives Patrick some very good advice, the reason for that glorious scene later on…

CAMERON: Look, you embarrassed the girl. Sacrifice yourself on the altar of dignity and even the score.

This gets Patrick thinking…

45) And I’m just going to add the video here because this whole scene is just rom-com perfection and bless Heath Ledger again, okay? And why didn’t we get more of him singing in everything he did? His voice just makes me feel things, okay?

Seriously, how do you say no to that boy asking you to let him love you? You don’t say no, that’s how.

Same, Kat. Hard same.

46) Kat goes into detention and distracts the coach while Patrick attempts to escape out the window, and then…

And the teacher is looking directly at her tits? And while the distraction tactic worked, how was she not sent to the principal’s office? Patrick was sent to the principal’s office for “exposing himself” with a bratwurst while joking with the cafeteria lady, and Kat is literally exposing herself and she walks scot-free? Hmm.

47) Patrick and Kat have another heart to heart, and to be honest, it always melts this cold heart of mine…

PATRICK: So, what's your excuse? KAT: For? PATRICK: For acting the way we do? KAT: I don't like to do what people expect. Why should I live up to other people's expectations instead of my own? PATRICK: So, you disappoint 'em from the start and then you're covered, right? KAT: Something like that. PATRICK: Then you screwed up. KAT: How? PATRICK: You never disappointed me.

Same, Kat. SAME.

48) #SWOON

49) And this is the part that doesn’t make sense to me. They’ve just had this perfect date, and they’re growing closer, and they’ve kissed, and he clearly likes her. And the reason he didn’t kiss her after the party was that he was feeling guilty about the way he’d gotten her to go out with him and fall for him – through deception and manipulation. And now that they’re much closer and into each other, he tries very hard to get her to go to prom with him, pushing her in a way that makes her feel uncomfortable, and like, why? They’re clearly not the type of people who go to proms, so why not take Joey’s money and screw the deal? Why did he have to keep his promise? Why not be honest with Kat? Why not tell her, I like you a lot and this idiot is paying me to date you even though I’m honored to do that for free so why don’t we team up and scam him? I know the answer is “conflict”, but it’s always pissed me off.

50) Seriously, though, Cameron. Why?

51) In true teen-rom fashion, everyone needs to be paired up, right?

52) See what I mean about the jokes?

53) Loved the Dawson’s Creek reference…

Believe it or not, a lot of people thought DC was scandalous at the time. And DC was so naïve compared to its predecessors The OC or Gossip Girl…

54) Kat finally opens up to Bianca and explains why she has so many issues and why she doesn’t want to conform to high school’s social rules and expectations and stereotypical idea of “normalcy.” She’d had a less than stellar dating experience back when she was way too young and far too vulnerable with none other than Joey, who had slept with her and dumped her right after. Oh yeah, and it all happened right after her mom had left them. In an attempt to prevent the same thing from happening to her little sister, she had agreed to their dad’s rules, effectively preventing Bianca from experiencing anything on her own. It’s kind of a case of the pot calling the kettle black, considering she’d complained about the very same thing to her father.

55) Kat finally realizes she’s been unfair to her sister and decides to go to prom, to their father’s dismay. Kat even swallows her pride and actually apologizes to Patrick for questioning his motives to ask her to the prom, and he has the nerve to forgive her. Dude, you do have ulterior motives, and the girl you like is actually apologizing even though she’s done nothing wrong and you’re blatantly lying, and he doesn’t even bat an eyelash when he tells her “You’re forgiven.” I mean, I love Patrick, but still… not cool.

56) Bless Walter.

57) I guess they’re a thing, because why not?

58) And this is, among many other reasons, why I can’t hold anything against Patrick Veronica…

He got her favorite band to play in the prom.

59) Chastity is such a bitch for no reason? Like, she and Bianca were close friends, and then, all of a sudden, they aren’t? And she’s so mean to Bianca!

60) And leave it to Joey to ruin everything…

61) And I truly love that Bianca is the one to put him in his place…

62) See? He’s a good guy, he was just trying to protect his daughters the only way he knew how…

WALTER: Bianca did what? KAT: What's the matter, upset that I rubbed off on her? WALTER: No, impressed. Fathers don't like to admit it when their daughters are capable of running their own lives. It means we've become spectators. Bianca still lets me play a few innings. You've had me on the bench for years. And when you go to Sarah Lawrence I won't even be able to watch the game. KAT: When I go? WALTER: Oh, boy. Don't tell me you changed your mind. I already sent 'em a cheque

63) And I also have to include the video for this scene because it’s just… *chef’s kiss*… Julia Stiles absolutely nails this one, and it never fails to bring me to tears…

Same, Patrick. Same.

64) And while the fact that he doesn’t immediately run after her always has me screaming, he does make up for all of it…

KAT: A Fender Strat? Is it for me? PATRICK: Yeah, I thought you could use it, you know, when you start your band. Besides, I had some extra cash, you know. Some asshole paid me to take out this really great girl. KAT: Is that right? PATRICK: Yeah, but I screwed up. I, um... I fell for her. KAT: Really? PATRICK: It's not every day you find a girl who'll flash someone to get you out of detention. KAT: Oh, God. You can't just buy me a guitar every time you screw up, you know. PATRICK: Yeah, I know. But there's always drums and bass and maybe even one day a tambourine. KAT: And don't just think you can...

65) This movie is hardly a masterpiece, but it doesn’t intend to be either, and not every movie needs to be. It’s a feel-good movie, and it delivers on so many levels. It’s funny, it’s tropey, it’s cute, it’s romantic, it has a great soundtrack, and you just feel a whole lot better after watching it. It’s the 90s at its best, and that’s why it became a classic.

What I love the most, though, is Kat’s character development. We see this girl who is a badass and super smart, takes no bullshit, holds everyone accountable for their shitty behavior, and has a great wit. But she is not without flaws. She’s closed off because she has been hurt before, both by her mother and her first love. She holds everyone at bay because it’s easier that way. Throughout the movie, however, she shows empathy and a lot of vulnerability. And she soon finds out that she had been missing out on a lot of things by shielding her emotions. She’d missed out on having a good relationship with her sister and on finding love again. What is truly admiring about Kat, though, is that when she’s hurt the most and she has every reason to close herself off again, she does the exact opposite. She opens herself up not only in front of the guy she’s in love with but everyone. The shrew cries and bares her soul for the world to see. Regardless of the happy ending, I think that in itself s truly inspiring, don’t you? 

66) Bonus: bloopers!

67)  Hope you enjoyed my recap, and, as usual, if you’ve got this far, thank you for reading! If you enjoy my recaps and my blog, please consider supporting it on ko-fi. Thanks!

[gunnerpalace]

Hi! Same anon as the previous one. Tbh, I agree wholeheartedly with you. Y'see I do ask rhetorically,too but i could really accept and understand how and why ppl can be oblivious to IchiRuki, and somehow felt that the 'canon' should suffice, even the most excruciating of all is the fact a number found the ending even acceptable (ships aside, too). Again, I could respect that. But it's my greatest bane when ppl ask 'why' and not be clear they are asking rhetorically because I literally will

provide you an actual answer. And I get it, it’s the reason why ppl find shipping wars toxic and silly. But then again, as human, conflicts are always part of us (partly because as social psych explains so, we are gravitated to the negative for that allows us to change and survive), and the reason why “logical fallacies” are coined in the first place. Human will always debate, and argue about something; the only thing we could change is how we approach the opposing views.

Again, I dont condone any way, shape or form of abuse and harm. In some certain extent, I could perhaps understand it’s much harder for some IH to approach the actual argument being there’s either too much noise, and trapped in their own island between sea of salt. Thus becoming too acquianted w/ few IH who shared the same thought until it became their views as the only truth (see, that’s why its important to have debates! it is what keep us grounded and fair! Just like you said)

Who am I to speak though? I never ever challenged anyone anyways. And as you said, you just have to understand things in every way you could possibly think of–endless ‘whys’. Which is where I agree in your reply the most–this silly fandom wars is just the black mirror to every truth that lies beneath human psyche–the dark and the grimy. Heck, being a psych major is like staring at dark hole–at times, good, but most just plain confusing, revolting even or just heartbreaking.

Sorry it’s been long, but for the final of this ask: let me tell how glad I was with IchiRuki fandom I found in tumblr. It was the saltiest I’ve ever been (im not generally a fandom person anyways) but it’s the himalayan salt–expensive and actually nutritive it really deepened my desire to become wiser in general. And you for your wonderful essays, critiques and whatnot. I definitively would love to talk with you more not only about IchiRuki but the wonders and nightmare that us humans! Kudos!

I have sitting in my drafts a post spelling out my thoughts on “canon” (and thus, the people who cling to it) in that as a concept it privileges:

officiality over quality when it comes to validity (thus violating Sturgeon’s law)

corporations (intellectual property rights holders) over fans, and thus capitalists over proletarians

hierarchical dominance over mutualist networking within fandom

curative fandom over transformative fandom

genre over literary content

plot over characters

events over emotions

It is notable that (1) generally degrades art as a whole, (2) generally advances the capitalist agenda, and (3–7) generally advances the dominance of men over women (as the genders tend to be instructed by society to view these as A. dichotomies rather than spectrums, and B. to ascribe gender to them and make them polarities). These form the sides of a mutually reinforcing power structure (in the typical “Iron Triangle” fashion) designed to preserve and maintain the status quo.

Who really benefits from say, the policing of what is or is not “canon” in Star Wars? Disney, first and foremost. And then whomever (almost certainly male) decides to dedicate their time to memorizing the minutiae of whatever that corporation has decided is “legitimate.”

One can imagine a universe in which fan fic is recognized by companies for what it is: free advertising. (Much like fan art already is.) Instead, it is specifically targeted by demonetization efforts in a way that fan art isn’t. Why? Because it demonstrates that corporate control and “official” sanction has no bearing on quality, and it is thus viewed as undermining the official products.

In the same way, by demonstrating that most “canonical” works are frankly shit, it undermines the investiture of fans in focusing on details that are ultimately errata (the events, the plot, the genre), which is the core function of curative fandom and the reason for its hierarchical structure. The people who “know the most” are at the top, but what they “know” is basically useless garbage. And those people so-engaged are, of course, usually male.

To “destroy” the basis of their credibility, and indeed the very purpose of their community, is naturally viewed by them as an attack.

(This is not to say that efforts to tear down internal consistency within established cultural properties are good unto themselves, or even desirable. For example, efforts to redefine properties such as Star Wars, Star Trek, Doctor Who, and Ghostbusters, for the sake of a identity-politics agenda have largely A. failed as art, B. failed as entertainment, C. failed to attract the supposedly intended audience, and D. failed to advance the agenda in question. Trying to repurpose extant media in the name of culture wars is essentially always doomed to failure unless it is done deftly and gradually.)

(At the same time, this also shows what I was talking about last time, with regard to people seeing whatever they want to see. You will see people complain that Star Trek and Doctor Who didn’t “used to be so political,” which is obviously nonsense. These shows were always political. What changed was how their politics were presented. For example, Star Trek has, since TNG, always shown a nominally socialist or outright communist future, but was beloved by plenty of conservatives because they could [somehow] ignore that aspect of it.)

Of course, almost no one is seriously suggesting that one side of the spectrums outlined above be destroyed, rather merely that a new balance be struck upon the spectrum. But, as we have seen time and again in society, any threat to the status quo, whether that be 20% of Hugo Awards going to non-white male authors or the top income tax rate in America being increased by a measly 5.3% (from 28.7% to 34%… when the all-time high was 94% and for over 50 years it was above 50%) is a threat. This is why, for example, Republicans are out there branding AOC as a “socialist” when her policies are really no different at all from a 1960 Democrat who believed in FDR’s New Deal. (Which they, of course, have also demonized as “socialism.”)

(As an aside, all this ignores the fact that most of the “literary canon” of Western civilization, or at least English literature… is Biblical or historical fan fic.)

And this is when I finally get to my point.

Those people out there who denigrate and mock shippers and shipping, the people who hurl “it reads like fan fiction” as an insult, and so on, are the people who benefit from and enjoy the extant power structure. You will see the same thing with self-identified “gamers” complaining about “fake girl gamers.” Admitting that the hobby has a lot of women in it, and a lot of “casuals,” and is indeed increasingly dominated by “non-traditional demographics” is an affront to the constructed identity of being a “gamer.” They are “losing control.” And they don’t like it.

This exact same sort of population is what the “fanbase” of Bleach has been largely reduced down to through a slow boiling off of any actual quality. Of course they’re dismissive of people who are looking for anything of substance: their identity, their “personal relationship” with the franchise, is founded on a superficial appreciation of it: things happening, flashy attacks, eye-catching character designs, fights, etc.

(What this really boils down to, at heart, is that society at large has generally told men that emotions are bad, romance and relationships of all kinds are gross, and that thinking and reflecting on things is stupid. So of course they not only don’t care about such things, but actively sneer at them as “girly” or “feminine,” which is again defined by society at large as strictly inferior. And this gender divide and misogyny is of course promulgated and reinforced by the powers that be, the capitalists, to facilitate class divisions just like say racism generally is.)

(The latest trick of these corporate overlords has been the weaponization of “woke” culture to continue to play the people off one another all the time. “If you don’t like this [poorly written, dimensionless Mary Sue] Strong Female Character, then you are a racist misogynist!” They are always only ever playing both sides for profit, not advancing an actual ideological position. It is worth noting that there was a push by IH some years ago to define IR as “anti-feminist” for critiquing Orihime for essentially the exact same reasons [admittedly, not for profit, but still as critical cover].)

Which makes it very curious, therefore, that the most ardent IH supporters tend to be women. (Though there are more than a few men, they seem to tend to support it because it is “canon” and to attack it is to attack “canon” and thus trigger all of the above, rather than out of any real investment.) I think there are a number of reasons for this (which I have detailed before) and at any rate it is not particularly surprising; 53% of white women voted for Trump, after all.

What we are really seeing in fandom, are again the exact same dynamics that we see at larger and larger scales, for the exact same reasons. The stakes are smaller, but the perception of the power struggle is exactly the same.

Of course, the people who are involved in these things rarely think to interrogate themselves as to the true dimensions and root causes of their motivations. People rarely do that in general.

Putting all that aside, I’m glad that you have found a place you enjoy and feel comfortable, and thank you for the kind words, although I am not of the opinion that there is anything poignant about the non-fiction I write. It is, as I keep trying to emphasize, all there to be seen. One just has to open their eyes. So, it’s hard for me to accept appreciation of it.

Anyway, don’t feel shy about coming off of anon rather than continuing to send asks. We don’t really bite.

[caerulcum]

4, 19, 20, 22, 23?? :3

character development

4. Has your character ever witnessed something that fundamentally changed them? If so, does anyone else know?

God, which one do I even pick lmfao. Blue’s had so many fundamentally changing circumstances to happen in his life ... too many to rightfully list, quite frankly and they all changed him for a different reason. The only person to know most of them, or all of them, is his big brother, quite frankly. But regardless I can think of ... 5 or 6 different circumstances that changed Blue lmao. 

19. What is your character’s biggest relationship flaw? Has this flaw destroyed relationships for them before?

Ooooh ... honestly I have no fucking idea what his flaw would be in a relationship. I have yet to have much of a chance to write Blue in a romantic relationship just yet, but if I’d have to guess, it would likely be him being overly touchy / feely? At least with the wrong person. I could see his hair-trigger temper getting the best of him too and creating issues, but typically with people he loves that temper has a somewhat longer fuse. 

20. In what ways does your character compare themselves to others? Do they do this for the sake of self-validation, or self-criticism?

If there is anybody that Blue compares himself to, its his big brother Ash … with him, Blue definitely compares himself the most, and its almost always critical. ‘I’m not as strong, I’m not as smart, I’m not as good at planning things out, I wasn’t good enough for Dad’, etc. He’s done his best to get out of that mindset he’s had since they were kids, but its not easy to deal with even now, despite it having drastically lessened over the years. For the most part he’s been able to silence it except on the bad days.

Aside from Ash, he does compare himself side by side to other self proclaimed heroes, how well they’re able to do their job without messing things up, and that too is a bit critical, but its more half and half? Like ‘yeah I just did that and this other hero couldn’t’ but half the time tht’s because Blue’s methods are … more chaotic lmao.

22. What does your character like in other people?

He likes somebody that’s fun and good natured, tbh. Okay so maybe good natured isn’t the proper thing I’m looking for, but somebody that’s fun loving is definitely a plus for Blue to be around. They’re who he tends to get along with the best … but when you get this boy around somebody who’s serious and grumpy? Oooooh his antagonistic nature really shows. So I guess that’s something he likes too in other people… uuuh. He secretly likes super cuddly people too… even if cuddling does hurt. He still likes it a lot.

23. What does your character dislike in other people?

Blue deeply dislikes people that are high and mighty and speak out their asses. Especially people that give out advice to him without him wanting it. Those types of people tend to make him feel more stupid than he already feels at times, tend to make him feel lacking. I’d say he tends to dislike people who make it seem like everything comes easy to them too, just out of jealousy factor... 

Rich people too. He’s not a big fan of rich people since they tend to have everything handed to them. Or at least, that’s what he assumes. 

[mattyfm]

new york’s very own matthew oliver was spotted on broadway street in converse . your resemblance to luke hemmings is unreal . according to tmz , you just had your twenty-fourth birthday bash . while living in nyc ,  you’ve been labeled as being temperamental , but also benevolent . i guess being a gemini explains that . 3 things that would paint a better picture of you would be bubbly laughter, the smell of fresh coffee, & long drives to watch the sunset  .  ( cis male & he/him  )  +  ( monique , 20 , she/her , pst . )

my name is monique i’m both the baddest and saddest bitch you’ll ever meet and i have NEVER written a concise intro in my life, so be prepared for a lot of jumping around, incomplete thoughts, and information you didn’t ask for. without further ado let me introduce you to my angel boy matthew oliver.

𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐬

full name. samuel matthew oliver.

nicknames. sam, sammy, matt, & matty (preferred name and most commonly refereed to as).

age. twenty-four.

date of birth. june 17th.

occupation. actor. (i might give him another job eventually but don’t hold me to that)

sexual / romantic orientation. bisexual & biromantic.

birthplace. asbury park, new jersey.

zodiac. gemini.

spoken languages. english.

𝐛𝐢𝐨𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐩𝐡𝐲

samuel mattew oliver was born to two extremely loving parents jeremy and elizabeth marie oliver, arguably one of the most influential celebrity couples known to man, at least that’s what it felt like growing up in the household, everyone was talking about the oliver’s and when they weren’t...well that never happened

as a middle child, preceded by his older brother mason, and succeeded by his younger sister cassandra, naturally he was born with a crave for validation, anything that separated him for his siblings

but naturally in his need to be different he found his closest allies, more so mason than cassie, but eventually she grew on him, and was most certainly not forced upon the dynamic duo of brother by their parents, but believe me he grew to adore her!

childhood was seemingly normal minus the bombarding questions from nosy students who wanted to know what it was like to have celebrity parents or be rich or live in a house with more bedrooms than necessary 

unlike his siblings however matty reveled in the attention way more than he let on, it was nice to be noticed for something, even if it wasn’t quite what he’d been hoping to be noticed for

but by no means was he stupid! he wouldn’t allow anyone to take advantage of him and had an unusual talent for knowing when people only wanted to use his friendship as some sort of gain for himself, and extended this talent to his sister cass, because boy oh boy did she need it

their dad who i forgot to mention was a professor at juiliard, his alma matter, caused a constant bouncing back and forth between their coastal home in new jersey and their urban townhouse in new york

both places felt like home to the trio! they made so many good memories, however matty was extremely preferential to the coast, and to this day maintains a beach boy vibe, swears everything is just better by the beach

going back to his upbringing for a minute high school rolled around for him and mason and he just became even more extremely protective of cassie, he went through things extremely unknown to his family

on the outside he was the model person and student, honor roll, a long glowing list of extracurriculars including sports, even holding down a normal job like everyone else at his high school, and not a single blemish in his criminal record, the squeaky clean olivers remained squeaky cleans

HOWEVER there was some shady stuff going on behind the scenes my guy, nothing too terrible, just the usual teenager with loving parents who raise a troubled teen, not because of any past trauma but a need to feel seen

DRUGS & ALCOHOL TW got into a lot of fight but always told them they had to fight after school, he got into drugs, nothing too hardcore, just weed (is that a weed i’m calling the police vibes).....at first.....but that’s a different story so moving on! he of course drank with his buddies at high school parties, honestly just vibing my guys, just straight vibes always

secret!!!!

CAR ACCIDENT TW & ALCOHOL TW & DEATH TW one day he’s vibing, it’s the summer they’re celebrating another school year complete, and by the end of the night nearly black out drunk at this point, he knows he can’t go home so he decides to get a ride home with a buddy he worked with, tell his parents that said buddy took him home after work, they worked on homework and fell asleep. and honestly had he had a little less to drink, he would’ve realized that his friend was just as drunk as he was, but they drove anyways. this lead to a drunken car accident, that ended in the death of a pedestrian. thankfully his friend’s dad was a lawyer, and they covered that shit up immediately.

after this whole ordeal choose an accelerated course of study to pursue his acting career, finally something people would talk about that would be solely his, like not really, but let him have his moment alright, he was desperate 

lowkey feels guilty about being a hypocrite towards cassie because he’s telling her not to do any of the thing 

ADDICTION TW he almost kicked his habit but getting back into acting and the guilt of having blood on his hands, was too much for matty, and he developed a drug / alcohol dependency, which he recognized was extremely harmful! he went to rehab! and has been very vocal about his struggle with addiction ever since

had an on set romance with a costar that crashed and burned, quite publicly, and was just not good for his mental health one bit! def didn’t help with his constantly teetering sobriety but he managed to get through it with the help of his family and his friends

acting wise he’s starred in a bunch of movies but his baby is the netflix show that he’s been working on, i would like to think it’s kind of a sitcom esque show mixed with the same comedic timing of the office, parks n rec, those kinda self-aware humor vibes

ADDICTION TW he plays one of the main character, and his dipped his toes into directing and writing a couple of episodes, the show truly gives me one day at a time vibes, just brings light to mental health, addiction, important issues you don’t normally see portrayed on tv, and he def plays schneider, the bumbling rich boy who does and says what he’s told, struggles with addiction, has a super childish nature, and just a hint of self-awareness but just a hint as a little treat

this is so ooc but i’m realizing he’s quite literally schneider from one day at a time

MENTAL HEALTH TW & ANXIETY TW has receded from that cool kid persona he once held back in what i refer to as his ‘glory days’ and is now extremely vulnerable to everything and everyone, will literally cry if you even look at him the wrong way. struggles with really bad anxiety, among other mental health issues (which is why his netflix show and he advocate so heavily for mental health!) but is quite literally one of the nicest people you’ll ever meet, softness runs in the oliver family ig.

IS LITERALLY SO CHILDISH....where was once extremely mature for his age....he now copes with his trauma by just acting like a toddler, literally mixes chocolate milk IN HIS MOUTH like a heathen, but that still doesn’t stop him from being fiercely protective of cassie, and will fight anyone for her

currently vibing! filming, being his best(?) self, and making trips to the nj coast

𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲

positive traits. accommodating, adaptable, affable, affectionate, agreeable, altruistic, amiable, attentive, caring, cheerful, communicative, compassionate, considerate, courteous, creative, dependable, easy-going, empathetic, exuberant, friendly, fun-loving, generous, gentle, genuine, gregarious, helpful, honest, humane, humble, joyful, kind, lively, loyal, loving, optimistic, outgoing, passionate, playful, reliable, resilient, romantic, sincere, sociable, tender, trustworthy, thoughtful, understanding, and warm-hearted.

negative traits. anxious, amenable, avoidant, awkward, critical, defensive, disorganized, dogmatic, (over)emotional, evasive, foolish, forgetful, forgiving, gullible, headstrong, hopeless, idealistic, impatient, impulsive, irrational, messy, moody, oblivious, (over)protective, sensitive, shy, thoughtless, and weak-willed.

𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬

here’s some basic plot ideas but we can always brainstorm smth! friends, frenemies, enemies, friends to lovers, childhood friends, ex best friend, costars, unrequited crush, bad influence, exes, one night stand, roommates! i have