#I'm having so much fun reading this again

[becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys]

Clownfall: the Election Cometh

It's a long one, lads. Buckle up, get comfy, but the circus is in town for its final run. Ambient music as you read can be found here or here, take your pick. Get popcorn. Get snacks and water and a blanket.

Are you sitting comfortably?

Wednesday 22nd May

7.12am

Household favourite and queen of our hearts Pippa Crerar of the Guardian (her who did the investigative journalism that revealed PartyGate to the world) reports that UK inflation fell to a mere, paltry 2.3% in April.  The lowest level in three years!  Huzzah! But … still smaller than the decline that was expected. 

Nonetheless, Rishi Sunak and Jeremy Cunt whoops I'm so sorry I meant Cunt haha whoops said it again make a big fuss about how brilliant this news is, and how it shows that they are Good At Maffs after all that trouble with Liz Truss and Kwasi Kwarteng, who defined themselves as being Good At Maffs and then obliterated the economy in a single day.  Remember that! Good times. But hey, look, THIS PM/Grand Vizier combo are great at this! Inflation has fallen! Stop looking at the predicted rate! A fall is still a fall!

Crerar wonders whether people will actually feel better off, though – prices and mortgage rates are still high, after all. Food for thought.

10.04am

Jeremy Hunt is asked on the Today programme whether Sunak will call a general election.

Now, the logic here is that the government is likely to do better in an election if the economy’s improving; which, SunakCunt are now shrieking from the rooftops. So, is now the time? It's a win, and they've had so few of those, but historically people really do like to fall for the right wing = better economy myth... 

BUT – the Tories are doing so very badly in the polls.  Journalists favour the idea of an autumn election.  Tories do better when the weather’s bad, because fewer people go out and vote.

 “Well that’s a matter for the prime minister, it’s not a matter for me,” says Cunt. 

... Well.  Not ruling it out, then? Diddorol.

10.30am

It's Wednesday, aka the date that Tory cabinet ministers have their weekly meeting. They are duly sent the agenda.

There is no mention at all of an election announcement, nor any plan for an election.

Fair enough! 'Twas an idle thought. Plus, it would actually be bad timing from a logistical perspective - David Cameron, Foreign Secretary and Bae of Pigs, is currently flying out to Albania for an important international meeting, and Jeremy Cunt is on TV all day today - ITV next.

12.18pm

Sunak is asked at Prime Minister’s Questions whether he’ll call a general election.  He doesn’t rule it out.

12.56pm

Fun tweet alert!

2.31pm

Pippa Crerar asked Sunak’s press secretary whether he was calling an election.  She refused to comment.

Surely it’s a terrible time to call an election! Everyone hates them!  But suddenly …

A Cabinet meeting is scheduled for 4.15pm.  David Hameron suddenly u-turns in Albania and comes straight back home, his meeting un-met.  Jeremy Cunt cancels his ITV appearance.  The afternoon meeting is cancelled. Number 10 stops responding to journalists.  Manifesto work has stepped up.  Sunak’s chief-of-staff is spotted wearing a suit and tie WHICH IS UNUSUAL.  Senior ministers have spent the last few days doubling down on dividing lines.  And Tory bosses had a meeting this week to discuss how much money they could spend before a summer election.

The UK press sense blood in the water.

3pm

Okay.

There’s something you need to understand:

People suspect Rishi Sunak doesn’t actually want to live in the UK.  He’d prefer to be in California.  He’s here because he’s an MP.

You need to know this to understand this truly historic incident.

Nadine Dorries has produced a good tweet.

...

...

...

No, we all need to sit with this one for a minute

(For the record... to us, that is an excellent joke. But I strongly suspect she wasn't joking and was trying to make a catty accusation instead, which coincidentally appeared like a roast.

Scientists are referring to this as Stopped Clock Syndrome.)

5.17pm

With great dignity, Rishi Sunak stands outside Number 10 and announces a general election on 4 July.

And by “great dignity”, I mean he’s soaked by rain, while “Things Can Only Get Better” plays in the background courtesy of an anti-Tory protestor with a big speaker and a dream; the song adopted by he Labour Party for the 1997 election, where Tony Blair famously won a landslide victory after 18 years of Tory rule. Eventually, the volume of it is raised so high Sunak is, on more than one level, drowned out.

5.37pm

According to Gabriel Pogrund of the Times, Labour can’t believe Number 10 allowed this to happen.

One Labour insider texts: “Umbrellas are woke”

6.06pm

Good tweet alert!

8pm

A later Guardian article reports that Sunak greeted around a hundred Tory activists – still wearing the same rain-soaked trousers from the announcement.

No word at all on why he doesn't have aides capable of fetching him dry trousers. Perhaps those, too, are woke.

8.14pm

A Sky News reporter is at Sunak’s campaign launch.  But, bafflingly, he’s forcibly removed.  Extraordinary scenes

Elanor's Pro Tip: Removing a journalist may not be the best PR move for the start of an election trail.

8.27pm

9.36pm

A GBNews reporter claims that some Tory MPs are trying desperately to replace Sunak as leader in order to call off the general election.  For this to work, they’d need a vote of no confidence before the dissolution of parliament on Thursday 30 May.  Except actually, that would have to happen before the proroguing of parliament on Friday 24 May.

So … this won’t work.  But how very incredible - and hilarious - that they’re trying.

10.39pm

Let's take a look at the evening headlines!

A great start to Sunak’s campaign, with newspapers - including the Tory giant The Telegraph - celebrating the triumphant launch of his campaign:

Well! WHAT a day! Let's see how Thursday goes.

Thursday 23 May

8.00am

The BBC takes a moment to gleefully throw off the shackles of political oppression of the last 12 years to reveal that Rishi Sunak's announcement of a July election, the single most important announcement for a sitting government, the most sensitive and vitally-timed event in their calendar...

Was a total surprise to the rest of the party.

Tory party MPs found out when we did that they were about to have to campaign again. For a snap GE. Three weeks after having just done it for the council elections, in which they experienced the greatest single loss of their councillors in history. Even the damn meeting agenda was fake.

Still. Perhaps this explains the lack of umbrella or trousers.

9.09am

Nigel Farage confirms he will NOT stand at the general election. 

*pause for applause*

That’s because he’s helping Trump get re-elected in the US right now.

*pause for screams*

This is good news for the Tories!  And the rest of Britain, actually (commiserations to America. Please shoot him). Farage’s right-wing populist party - Reform UK - is the spiritual successor to UKIP and the Brexit Party, who’ve been splitting the right-wing vote for years.  Farage is popular; it’s bad news for Reform if he’s not part of their campaign, but simply fantastic news for those of us who think queer folks, women and people of colour deserve human rights.

9.19am

According to BBC News and others, Sunak has hired Isaac Levido, the election strategist behind the Tories’ landslide win in 2019.  Levido knows his stuff, and advised Sunak to stick with an autumn election.

Sunak ignored this advice.  Lol.

9.20am

In the Guardian, Sunak says there WON’T be planes of immigrants flying to Rwanda before the general election.  Good news for those of us who think it’s monstrous to deport immigrants to countries with unsafe governments.  Bad news for Tory voters who were hoping to get racists to vote for them.

Now, this is particularly funny, because promising to deport refugees to Rwanda in spite of overwhelming legal opposition on human rights grounds is probably the single hill that the Tories have chosen to commit genocide on. This bill has been in and out of every court in the land since they promised it in 2019. It's been on again off again more than a tawdry tabloid romance. But, they finally managed to push it through, and the first planes were set to fly in July.

This means! That Sunak's strongest cards going into the election were the drop in inflation, and the Rwanda bill. He could sell it as "In spite of those bleeding heart liberals, we persevered and managed to tenaciously get rid of these browns and thus fulfilled our promise", and the fact that it won't actually affect the immigration numbers wouldn't be clear until after the election. And make no mistake, it is VITAL that those planes fly before any election - quoth one influential Conservative MP on the right of the party to the BBC:

“I know what question you’re going to ask us again and again. "You’ll say we’ve been banging on about Rwanda for years and we’ve only managed to fly one migrant out there - and we paid him to go”.

It took a single day for that gamble to dramatically fail.

Lol. Lmao, even. One might almost say rofl.

9.21am

Sunak is emphasising his own role in managing the economy.

The Guardian’s Rowena Mason points out that it might be better to sell this as a Tory victory rather than a Sunak victory, considering how badly Sunak’s doing as an individual in the polls.

10.45am

I'm obviously giving a lot of attention here to the funniest and most ridiculous stuff, but let’s take a moment to celebrate some genuinely brilliant journalism:

0_o

The whole article’s worth reading. It confirms that at least one more hi-vis wearer was a Tory councillor in disguise (in this case Ben Hall-Evans). Perhaps this is why they started by removing all the real journalists.

12.42pm

Sunak’s campaign takes him to a brewery in Wales!  He attempts some Bonding With The Working Man and asks the workers if they’re excited for the football.

Top tip: if you don’t realise the country you’re in hasn’t qualified for the Euros, maybe don’t even mention the subject.

6.55pm

... here is a new problem. Ish.

As mentioned, three weeks ago, England held local council elections. In that time, the Tories lost over half their councillors; an unprecedented and staggering loss in one event. We are all still bathing in the schadenfreude.

But, many of those then left the party (probably fairly, actually - monsters though Tories are, that cannot have been fun.) But, the way politics in the UK works is that when you vote, you don't vote for the party - you vote for your local representative, and then it's a numbers game as to which party gets to rule. This means, with this sudden last-minute possibly-impulsively-declared-by-one-soggy-madman election now six weeks away, those candidates all need replacing so that the Tories will have a shot at getting the numbers they need to form a majority government.

Channel 4’s Paul McNamara reports that Conservative HQ have emailed asking for candidates in almost 100 seats.  The deadline’s tight for this – and apparently, joining the lengthening list of people who weren't informed of this stupid election plan, Tory associations are livid at being left so unprepared.

Now, a lot of these seats are Labour strongholds, so you don’t necessarily need more than a token Tory candidate for them. Phew! A great relief.

But some of them are actually good Tory seats. Uh oh!  Basildon, Bury St Edmunds, Wellingborough and Rushden …  It’s a bad hit to the Tories to have so little time to find good candidates for these seats.

8.59pm

Labour launch a campaign video.  It’s long, but the message is, “Remember life before the Tories got into power?  Wasn’t it BRILLIANT?”

And to prove how great 2009 was, they’ve included a clip of David Tennant’s Dr Who saying “I don’t want to go.”

Lol.

9.57pm

Filmmaker Richard Cubitt jokily suggests he could stand as a Tory candidate, and immediately defect to Labour as soon as possible once elected.

I don’t know if the deadline’s closed, but I am now speaking to the chat. Lads: the time will never be better. Do it. Tell the Tories you'll stand for them. Immediately defect. You have the opportunity to do the funniest thing. Be the rot in the barrel. The time is now.

ANYWAY. Oh boy. Day one of campaigning was quite bad. Ah well! Onwards and upwards for Wali Heb Broli. Let's see what Friday brings.

And of course: the losses are staggering (100 candidates!), but it could be worse.

At least it's not senior MPs.

Friday 24 May

7.00am

Over 70 MPs confirm they will not be standing for re-election.

7.35am

It’ll be lovely to see this election get rid of some truly awful Tories.  But no need to wait that long!  John Redwood stands down.  I haven't mentioned him before, but let's look at his clownface eggshell.

He opposed reducing the age of consent for homosexuality in 1994 and 1999, he voted to keep Section 28 in 2003, he opposed same sex marriage, he voted to reintroduce the death penalty in 1988, 1990 and 1994, he’s argued against Greta Thunberg over the UK’s climate emissions.

Although English, he became Secretary of State for Wales in 1993, and at a Tory conference, had to mime badly to the Welsh national anthem which he hadn’t bothered learning.  In 1995, he cheated Wales out of a £100 million grant by returning it unspent to the treasury, so it could go back to England.

So, John – if by some fantastically rare chance you’re somehow reading this – it’s wonderful to see you step down.  I wish you a very warm fuck you.  And I hope the rest of your life is absolutely horrible and filled with immeasurable pain. Kisses.

7.58am

Vicky Spratt of the i newspaper announces that, with an election announced, the Renters’ Reform won’t pass.

This is a big deal, actually - this was a rare good promise in the Tories’ 2019 manifesto to protect renters by ending no-fault evictions.  A good promise!  With cross-parliamentary support, only slowed as much as it was because most Tory backbenchers are landlords and so tried to block it. But the fighting raged on, and it was finally agreed.

And now it’s broken.  Wasting months of work by stakeholders, and thus forming another election promise that would have sailed through if only the election hadn't been called for July.

8.09am

Jeremy Corbyn – remember him? Former Labour leader, who was expelled from the Labour party in 2020 – confirms he’ll be standing as an independent.  He’s continued to be a member of Labour despite being an independent MP – but standing against Labour in an election means he’ll have his membership revoked too.

9.26am

So where are we at? How do you reckon the normal Tories in the party are faring? Do you think they're positive of a win? Do you think they expect to lose?

Great Guardian article here:

Highlights - one government minister happened to bump into his equivalent opposition member, and immediately thrust his official folder towards them, saying, “You might as well have this now.”

Another Tory MP hugged a Labour colleague and cast their arm around the room.  “Good luck.  This is all yours.”

One Tory backbencher was asked if it was a good idea to call an election.  “It’s a disaster. I can’t understand it.”

Even when they’re being optimistic, the Tories seem a little glum.  One long-standing MP said: “Of course I’m going to fight it, I don’t believe in just giving up like the prime minister has obviously decided to.”

A former minister raises an interesting point.  It’s not long, after all, since the Tories suffered those major defeats at the local council elections.  That's impacted the number of candidates, of course - but, local canvassing is largely done, on all parts of the political spectrum, but activist volunteers.

That loss was three weeks ago. If you were a volunteer who just spent weeks knocking on the doors of your neighbours and community, trying to convince them to vote for the dead horse, and then lost – maybe you won’t feel like hitting the streets again so soon. Maybe you'd prefer to be able to meet your neighbours' eyes when you bump into them in the bread slicing queue at Morrisons.

Some MPs have even admitted they won’t be cancelling holiday plans to fight the election.  On top of that, there's over 70 MPs that have already confirmed they’re quitting and won’t be seeking re-election!!! Absolute scenes.

Interestingly, some anti-Sunak Tories report frustration.  They reckon they were close to calling a vote of no-confidence, in the hopes of replacing Sunak with a different leader.  No idea if this is true – and if true, whether Sunak knew it. But given the panicked speed at which it seems to have been called...

11.08am

The campaign takes Rishi Sunak to the Titanic Quarter, to be interviewed by Belfast Live.

Elanor's Pro Tip: if you’re the leader of a failing political party, maybe don’t let journalists interview you on a site named after history’s most famous sinking ship.

11.57am

How’s the campaign going, Rishi?

Oh, Rishi. Looks like someone else is not meeting anyone's eyes in the bread-slicing queue.

1.12pm

Politics UK reports that 75 Tory MPs are now standing down at the election – the same number of Tories who stood down ahead of the 1997 election.

2.49pm

Sunak’s campaign takes him on board an aeroplane.

Elanor's Pro Tip: if you’re the leader of a failing political party, maybe don’t be photographed in front of an exit sign.

7.07pm

MICHAEL GOVE ANNOUNCES HE’S STANDING DOWN AS AN MP!

I could honestly use that gif like seventeen times in this write up. You can all thank me for my restraint in choosing just one.

The 79th Tory to do so at this election – an all-time record exodus.  Hey gang, would you like to see some familiar names joining him in this?

Theresa May

Sajid Javid

Dominic Raab

Matt Hancock

Ben Wallace

Nadhim Zahawi.

It’s just … not a great sign for the party, is it? That so many prominent MPs don’t reckon it’s worth sticking around.

7.50pm

Hey, remember those parody videos of Hitler getting angry with funny subtitles?  Someone made a good Sunak one:

10.48pm

The Guardian’s Kiran Stacey reports that Sunak will retreat from the campaign trail, spending the next day at home.

Honestly... that's probably best. Let him recover from the bread excitement.

10.50pm

We round off the day with Andrea Leadsom announcing she too is standing down as an MP. Bye, bitch.

WHAT A DAY! Still, Saturday will probably be better.

Saturday 25 May

12am

New episode of Doctor Who drops! It contains Welsh faeries. I later write a post explaining this. You're all welcome. Back to the circus.

10.06am

Good tweet alert!

11.14am

Keir Starmer promises to lower the voting age from 18 to 16 if he wins the election.

2.43pm

Hey remember how David Hameron was supposed to be in Albania? And actually went there? And then had to come back because of Rishi's totally-planned-for election announcement?

The Mirror reports that David Cameron spent £60,000 of taxpayers’ money getting to Albania for that trip.  He was there for 89 minutes, before he had to come back in light of the general election announcement.

This means it cost the country £674 a minute for Cameron to be in Albania for about as long as it takes to watch The Lion King.

6.14pm

Labour and the Tories put candidates forward for 650 seats in a general election.

Of course, that's not quite all of them. The Times’ Patrick Maguire understands that Labour have only 13 candidates left to select, which is pretty good.  The Tories are missing slightly more than that. 

They need to find around 190.

(The number is rising. Chat, you know what to do.)

9.29pm

According to the Telegraph, Theresa May has said if she was still PM she would have used an umbrella to declare the election.

She probably would have, too.

10.11pm

Now then!!! Gather round boys and girls and all the rest!

Remember: the election was called based upon the following main cards in Sunak's hand:

The Rwanda bill

Inflation falling

The Renter's Reform Bill

Inflation fell, but not by as much as it should have. The Rwanda plan fell through a day later. The election itself has blocked the Renter's Reform bill.

Rishi needs a new set of promises stat, in order to shore up votes from his most important bastions of support. What can he offer?

The evening brings the answer!

At 10.11pm - note the time - in spite of having taken the day off, Sunak promises mandatory national service for every 18 year old if he wins the election.  Either a year-long army placement, or a weekend a month volunteering for a year.

Sounds like a good pledge, if you’re hoping to motivate 18-year-olds to vote against you.

10.16pm

The Financial Times’ Jim Pickard reveals that the National Citizen Service (David Cameron’s legacy project) had its funding slashed by two-thirds in a 2022 review of government youth funding - when the chancellor was Rishi Sunak.

Five minutes.  That’s how long it took a journalist to melt Sunak’s new pledge.

Still; Tories never let facts get in the way.

10.27pm

Politics UK reports that leaked documents suggest teenagers would be jailed for refusing this national service.

11.47pm

Sunak's bad ideas generator works hard, but the meme makers of the internet work harder:

Still. Sunday is a day of rest! Hopefully Sunday will be better.

Sunday 26 May

9.50am

Let’s check the Sunday tweets.

Starting to think whoever is in charge of optics for Rishi Sunak may be a Labour plant.

10.21am

Fantastic tweet alert:

I Agree With Gabby

3pm

And then... PLOT TWIST!!!

FT’s Lucy Fisher reports that Sunak’s national service pledge - including assigning up to 30,000 18-year-olds to the military - was rejected this week by one of his own defence ministers.

Defence personnel minister Andrew Murrison warned of a hit to morale, headcount and resources if “potentially unwilling national service recruits” were introduced alongside Britain’s professional armed forces.

EVEN THE ARMY DON'T WANT THIS.

6.47pm

And then:

Incredible story from Gabriel Pogrund of the Times.

St Paul’s School, if you haven't heard of it, is an expensive and famous private school in England somewhere (I forget where and don't care).  As with other private schools, they’d be subject post-election to a Labour plan to remove their VAT exemption.

Tory MP Greg Hands took matters into his own Greg hands, and messaged the school’s parents’ WhatsApp group to try and drum up anti-Labour sentiment.

I can see the logic. These are parents with money, who have chosen to send their children to a private school that often means an easy track into politics generally and the Tory party specifically. I see why he thought he was safe.

Tumblrs, he was not safe.

Parents intervened, complaining about Hands spamming the chat, and claiming his use of the chat was “inappropriate”.

One parent messaged: “Can we stop assuming everyone is a Tory in this group.  A return to more morality, less corruption and more social conscience in British politics is not something to oppose necessarily.”

Another expressed that some parents will “feel it is hard to defend private schools being vat exempt.”

Ouch. Swing and a miss, Greg Hands.

Anyway. New week, new campaigning. I am writing this on Tuesday, and so our tale is nearly at an end for now; so let's see what happened on Monday.

Monday 27 May (Yesterday)

7.40am

Britain's teenagers respond to the national service plan. I love this tweet and the video it reposts:

And here, for your viewing pleasure, is the video:

8.17am

Tory MP Steve Baker (more on him later) actually tweets a public criticism of Sunak’s national service plan.  You might be thinking "Well yes, obviously"! But no! For you see, when approaching elections, parties need to be united. Divided parties generally find it harder to win elections.

Naughty Steve.

8.41am

Foreign Office Minister Anne-Marie Trevelyan, having seen the absolute shambles of Sunak’s campaigning, wakes up this fine Monday morn and invites him to hold her beer.

Appearing on Times Radio, she’s asked whether the parents of teenagers could be prosecuted if the teens refuse to take up national service.

And she doesn’t rule it out.

NO BUT WHAT THE FUCK. WHAT ARE YOU DOING ANNE-MARIE. IS THIS YOUR FIRST DAY OUT OF THE HOUSE.

Parents are NOT prosecuted for any wrongdoing of their ADULT CHILDREN.  How do you not understand this basic legal concept. The answer to that question was “no”!  You say “no” because it makes your party more likely to be elected, and you say “no” because the answer is no.

Oh dear. What a gaffe, as the papers say. Gosh, I really hope Anne-Marie Trevelyan’s gaffe stays contained.

8.56am

The Telegraph duly reports that parents of 18-year-olds might be fined if their children refuse national service.

Anne-Marie Trevelyan’s gaffe did not stay contained.

10.55am

Looks like the Tories are unhappy that the press revealed that Sunak took a day off from campaigning.

But that’s okay, they have a new strategy!  Reported by Politico, they’ve decided to suggest that Keir Starmer is too old to be a good Prime Minister.

They called him “weary” yesterday afternoon;

Tory Party Chair Richard Holden says it’s “bizarre” for Starmer to rest at home the day before a speech (but not for Rishi to - ? You know what, never mind);

A Tory aide tells the Sun that Starmer should be dubbed “Sir Sleepy” (what a Zinger, as those conscripted into national service say);

Another Tory aide calls Starmer “Sleepy Keir” according to the FT.

Keir Starmer is 61 years old.

11.17am

Let's check Tory candidate numbers!!!

Now last we looked it was 190, but obviously, as this is possibly their most urgent priority, they've been working flat out and recruiting across the land and so they have, fair play, managed to reduce that number.

The Spectator therefore reports that the Tories have 12 days to select 160 candidates.  Would you like to see the maths?

This means, on average, they need to select one candidate every 100 minutes.  Which is slightly less time than it takes to watch Toy Story 3.

#ChatYouKnowWhatToDo

12.41pm

The FT’s Lucy Fisher reports that Tory HQ has accidentally sent out an email criticising Tory MPs for failing to campaign, and warning of financial concerns in some seats.

Cannot stress this enough: even if the Tory campaign was going really well and they were predicting a landslide their way, this would be a terrible blow.

5.02pm

The Mirror reports that Tory MP Steve Baker is on holiday in Greece.  That’s pretty irresponsible, isn’t it?  What does Baker have to say for himself?

"The Prime Minister told everyone we could go on holiday and then called a snap election. So I've chosen to do my campaign work in Greece."

… this is the greatest Tory campaign in history.

(And once again... when exactly did you decide to do this, Rishi?)

5.15pm

In an absolutely baffling move whose motives I still cannot entirely fathom, Tory MP Lucy Allan - a repugnant, malignant liar of a woman who once altered an email from a constituent so she could claim it contained a death threat against her - is suspended by the party, for telling voters in her ward to vote for Reform UK instead of the Tories.

...

...

...

...wwwhyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

6.18pm

Good tweet alert! Here's political journalist Jonn Elledge:

6.30pm

Meanwhile, a Tory chooses to contact journalist Theo Usherwood over WhatsApp, criticising the election strategist Isaac Levido:

Now this is particularly interesting, because Levido is the guy who managed to swing the last GE to BlowJo, even though Labour were riding high on Corbyn. And I don't know, maybe he is actually shit at this and all that was luck.

I just... wouldn't have said he was the reason for this one going the way it is. Necessarily.

Finally, let's finish off Monday with a last good tweet:

10.06pm

***

That's all for now, folks! Thank you for reading, enjoy the circus playing out this week!

[devoutekuna]

Bring your child to work

Includes- Toji, Sukuna, Nanami, Gojo, Geto

Sukuna-

Sukuna doesn't have a job, you don't even know how he gets money. So he brings her to a village he recently raided, he sometimes raided them for resources or just for fun. Once he raided one just because he wasn't willing to pay for your pregnancy cravings. "Dad, this village is all burnt!" complaining at the sight of ash everywhere, kicking her foot through the charred grass blades. "Be quiet" glaring at his daughter as he walked away from her. He was trying to look for atleast a child to keep his daughter company. "Don't leave me!" Running up to him, he didn't understand how she could be scared when her father was the king of curses, plus it was broad daylight and no curse would dare get close to him.

Nanami-

"Let me come with you dad!" All dressed up in her father's clothes, frantically trying to tuck in the shirt, into her skirt. Stood Infront of the bathroom door, she had been awaiting her father to come out, walking out with a bottle of shaving foam in his hand. "You can't sweetheart" crouching down to say it, patting her head as a way to comfort her. She had gotten all dressed up by stealing her father's shirt and tie only to be rejected, even putting in his reading glasses to make her seem more professional. He knew for a fact that she wouldn't be coming with him to work, especially since he was on a mission today. Grabbing her by her shoulders as he dragged her out of the way. "Why not?" Begging for a chance. "Cause I said so" walking towards you.

Sat inside the office reading a book, he purposely didn't take any missions today so that his daughter thought that his job was boring and wouldn't ask again. "Dad, your work is boring!" Sat on the armchair beside him, she had nothing to do but wait for the 9 hours to pass. "I told you that" letting her sit through her actions.

Geto-

Geto has his daughter stand behind the curtains whilst he talks to his followers, not wanting her to hear anything he has to say, especially what would come after he gets mad. He has a personal servant bring her noise cancelling headphones when he starts to get annoyed. Crouching beside her as they played a game, she was so clueless to what her beloved father was doing. Murdering the so-called 'monkeys' of society. "When is my daddy done?" Pats on the head, despite having the headphones on she could recognise that from anywhere. "Right here princess" retracting his hand as he picked her up. Taking the headphones off, dropping them into the servant's hand as he walked off. "Hi daddy!"

Gojo-

When Gojo isn't busy, he's either at home with you or teaching his students, unfortunately for them, they were on a mission already. So he was just laying around in his office. "Dad I'm bored" sat on the sofa opposite him. "So am I" slouching in his chair, there was nothing to do. Even his second year students were on a mission. "Let's go see Nanamin" dragging his son out of his office, searching around the campus just to find the blond. Sat in one of the many lounge rooms. A sigh depleting from his mouth as he heard the voice of the strongest. "What is it now?" Refusing to look up from the book. "Nanamin!" Your son knew who Nanami was due to the many times that Gojo dropped him off on the campus when he went on missions. Despite his many times to stop Gojo's son from calling him 'nanamin' it never worked out since he was so much like his father. "We've come to see you!" Sitting down opposite him. "Are you sure you haven't come to drop your son off?" Receiving the snarky comment was like a bullet to the chest, but he was wrong this time.

Toji-

Toji wasn't officially employed, he was basically unemployed but he always acted like he was employed since he brought in good amounts of money. "Papa I want to help" kicking her little legs as she sat playing with one of the weapons. Her father was currently discussing the new target he had, redacting any words that she may pick up on. "No" Shiu carried on rambling on about the prices he would get if it was under a specific time. "Why not!?" Slapping the poor man with the weapon, fortunately it was blunt, just like playful cloud. "Cause you'll get in my way" ripping the weapon from her hands, putting it back inside the worm. Scrunching up her face as soon as she heard the harsh reality, "Mr Shiu would let me come!" Trying to prove her point even more. "No I wouldn't" he should be smoking right now but didn't for the courtesy of your kid, patting the girl's head as they walked out. Toji following behind him, chuckles could be heard as they left.

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

the girl next door 29

Warnings: this fic will include elements, some dark, such as age gap, manipulation, chronic illness, noncon/dubcon, coercion, and other untagged triggers. Please take this into account before proceeding. It is up to curate your online consumption safely.

Summary: A new neighbour moves in and upends your already disarrayed life.

Author’s Note: Please feel free to leave some feedback, reblog, and jump into my asks. I’m always happy to discuss with you and riff on idea. As always, you are cherished and adored! Stay safe, be kind, and treat yourself.

This lewk but silverfox

You peel off the suit and wring it out. You leave it in the bathroom to dry, but more so you don't need to look at it. You've never been so humiliated in all your life. 

Worse than your mother's bitter grumbles, or the way your grandmother used to nitpick at every part of you was that look in Steve's eyes. It was like nothing you've ever seen before. Not angry, not judging, but something mysterious that unsettled you. 

Ugh. You sneer at the wall as you pull on the baggiest tee shirt you have. You hate yourself. No, you hate your body. No matter what you do, it's clumsy and somehow you get in the way of yourself. 

You shimmy into a pair of pajama shorts and flop onto your bed. You could read but your head won't let you focus. Drawing isn't an option either, you're still shaking from the exposure. 

Sleep. Well, that won't come. Every time you close your eyes, you just see Steve and the water, and your nakedness. You can't imagine what your mother would've said if she'd saw. 

She hadn't, had she? 

You roll over and hide your head under your arm. You just lay there, desperate to escape somehow. The hours wear on, the day shifting around your unmoving form, the stagnant house dampening your skin with sweat.  

When you finally get the strength to flip onto your back, you realise you've been crying. You sniffle and mop your cheeks. You don't know why you're crying. Humiliation, sure, but don't be such a baby. 

You sit up cradle your head until it's a little less fragile. You get to your feet and shuffle out to use the bathroom. You pointedly ignore the pink checkered fabric. 

When you're done, you go to the kitchen. You look in the fridge. Not much there. You take out an old cup of pudding and fish out a spoon. You sit at the table and stir it but don't eat.  

You remember when you were a kid, your grandma would give you tapioca. Your mother only ever got banana. You hate banana pudding. It tastes so artificial. 

You're not a kid anymore. You're realising that now. It's time to be an adult. You don't have a place here anymore. Your mom has Steve and you have... nothing. 

The front door whines on its ungreased hinges. You wince and look up, shove a spoonful into your mouth. 

Steve appears. He has a tee on but still wears his swim shorts. You look at him dully and swallow, scooping up more of the pudding. 

"You hungry? You could have come over for lunch." 

You shrug and keep eating. Your stomach sickens at the overly sweet treat. You want to spit it out. 

"You're still mad?" He asks. 

You shrug again. 

He sighs. He crosses the room and pulls out the chair across from you, "look, sweetie," he twines his fingers through each other as he rests his arms on the table, "I'm real sorry. I was trying to have some fun. I made a mistake. We all do, right?" 

You stare at the table and nod. 

"Right, so can we move past it? Forget it ever happened?" 

"Forget?" You echo in a croak. "Erm." 

"Wiped clean," he unweaves his fingers and makes a smooth motion over the table top. "How about it? Can you forgive me?" 

You let the spoon go and slide the cup aside. You can't look up. It's more than the embarrassment of what happened. It's the constant shame that follows you around. You're just a hanger-on. He doesn't have to keep pretending because of your mom. She deserves to have a life after all the years she wasted on you. A life without you. 

"I'm sorry. I'm... I'm going to find a job and I'll do my best and..." you ramble as you trace your fingers on the table and tilt your head back and forth, "and you won't have to worry about me." 

"Sweetie?" He reaches over to still your hand, "what are you talking about?" 

"I shouldn't be... I shouldn't be living with you. Or mom. You two... I'm in the way--" 

"In the way? Sweetie," he squeezes your hand, "I promise you that's not true." 

"It has to be." 

"Why? Why does that have to be true?" 

"Because no one wants me," you turn your face down but he won't let go of your hand so you can hide. 

"I know that's not true," he insists.  

"It is. You see it. My mom..." you shudder and hold back a sob, "hates me." 

He's quiet. He clings to you even as you try to pull free. "I don't hate you." 

"You barely know me." 

"Sweetie, I know enough. Just enough to know you're a sweet girl. A good girl. All this time you've been taking care of your mom. Not anyone does that, you know? Most people would just leave her behind," he brings his other hand up to pet your knuckles, "and you're considerate and kind and gentle." 

"Please," you wisp and tug on your hand again, "you don't have to--" 

"I want you," he interjects as he tightens his grip, "sweetie, look at me." 

Your eyes flick up, startled by his hold and his tone. 

"You said no one wants you? I do. I shouldn't. I know it. I... I saw the way you take care of Holly, I saw how hard you try, I saw it all and I--" 

He finally lets you go. You recoil, shocked. Your hand tingles and your heart races. He doesn't mean it like that. He can't. You blink and lean back, making yourself as small as you can. 

"I'm sorry," he drops his head into his hands, "I'm sorry, sweetie. I'm trying not to feel like this. I've been fighting myself but..." he looks up, fingers stretched up his cheeks as his eyes glimmer, "I... don't love your mom. I only married her so... so..." he closes his eyes and trembles, "I shouldn't say it." His lashes flick open and he sits up straight, "so I could take care of you. That's why. But I couldn't... be honest. Because I didn't want to scare you or lose you. Just having you close is enough so I lied." He sniffs and a tear rolls out, "worse, I couldn't even be honest with myself. Not until now. Until it's too late." 

You gape at him. He just watches you. His expression is pained and sheepish.  

"Please, sweetie, say something." 

"You can't mean it," you breathe, "please take it back." 

"I can't," he utters. 

You sit in silence. You don't know what to say. You can't think. It's all too much. Why can't today just be over? 

He inhales and lets it out as he fixes his posture. He gulps thickly and you look up. He stares at you. The same look as before. The one you don't understand. 

"Sweetie," his voice is firmer and his tears are evaporated, "I have one question." You lower your brow, confused, "do you want your mom to be taken care of?" 

"What?" You squeak. 

"Your mom? You want her to be comfortable? Supported? Get the proper treatment?" He's staunch as he speaks, "you can't do it yourself. We both know you were struggling. Do you got the money for her next hospital stay? For the nurse?" 

You whimper and shake your head, "what do you mean?" 

"Sweetie, your mom needs me. You need me. Don't play dumb," he intones, "I will do anything. I will make sure mom is nice and cozy. She has her meds and everything she needs. There's only one thing I want in return." He clicks his tongue and inclines his head, "it's too bad it's the only thing you got." 

You stare at him. Through him. The whole world narrows in on you as your chest caves in. You close your eyes, wishing against everything, that it can make him go away. 

[dragon-kazansky]

Bridgerton shade of blue

Benedict Bridgerton x Female Reader

The Viscount is set on finding a wife this season, and you are trying again for your second season. While Anthony is dealing with trials between Edwina and Kate Sharma, you are dealing with trials of your own. Benedict Bridgerton is ever present in your life, but your pursuit to find a husband must come first. Society is ever so exhausting.

{Masterlist}

{Previous Chapter} - {Next Chapter}

Season Two

Chapter Twenty One - The one who sparkles

The next day, you find yourself at the Bridgerton house. Madame Delacroix is there with fabrics, so Violet may choose one for Eloise. Eloise could not care less about fabrics as she reads away on the sofa.

Francesca plays the piano beautifully in the background. You're standing by the piano watching her. She smiles as she plays, lost in her music. You loved that about Francesca. She was so different from her siblings.

Anthony was reading by the window quietly. He hadn't spoken a word since you got here. Not to you or his family.

Elosie and Anthony share a shirt discussion about ladies and gentlemen. Eloise finds all gentlemen a bore, and Anthony doesn't believe ladies can dance properly. His poor toes. He had spent all night dancing with no such luck as to finding his ideal wife.

Hyacinth makes a comment about how she thinks Eloise would be a wonderful diamond. Eloise looks at her youngest sister in her face and says, "I despise you."

They all chuckle.

Violet chooses the fabric she likes best, and Madame Delacroix packs her things. You don't even notice as she leaves that Benedict enters, greeting her fondly. The conversation is short, however, as Benedict's eyes land on you.

Madame Delacroix leaves.

Francesca finishes her piece on the piano and smiles at you when you clap softly. "Wonderful, Francesca. Simply, wonderful."

"Thank you."

Francesca leaves the room quietly, and you find a seat to occupy. Benedict, having been turned by Delacroix, decides to make his way over to you, but Anthony calls for him. Benedict sighs and makes his way to his brother with his sketchbook in hand.

"Are you and the modiste still, uh, making a stitch?" Anthony asks.

"Apparently not. Have you found a wife yet? Or are you planning to offend every girl until there are none left? Is mother aware?"

"Aware of what?" Violet asks, hearing them.

"I'm off to deal with our solicitor," Anthony states. "Have fun with your pretty pictures, brother."

You watch Anthony leave. Violet follows him.

You get up and take the seat Anthony was just in. You lean across the table slightly and look at Benedict.

"You're not playing with her anymore?" You ask, teasing him.

"What are you talking about?"

"Madame Delacroix."

"You know?" He asks, completely horrified by the thought.

"Yes."

"How?"

"Anthony told me. I'm not sure why. Who you fool around with is your business, not mine. You Bridgerton boys certainly keep yourself entertained." You chuckle.

"You seem rather calm about this."

"Why shouldn't I be? I'm not naive, Benedict." You glance at the others. "I'm aware of what some people do."

Benedict is stunned into silence as he stares at you. Seems there is more to you than he first assumed.

"It was just some fun," he says softly.

"I don't care." You tell him. "Do what you want, Benedict."

The smile you give him doesn't offer him much comfort.

At the next ball, the queen was expected to choose her diamond of the season. All ladies in white and gold were presented before her before moving alone. You and your mother curtsied. The queen barely glanced at you.

You both walk on.

"She did not look impressed," you commented quietly.

"She never does," your mother responds.

You sigh softly and stand off to the side. You watch people dance. Spotting the Sharma ladies, you watch them approach the queen and curtsy to her.

They walk away quite quickly. You're not sure what the queen had said, but Lady Mary Sharma didn't seem too happy.

"May I have this dance?"

You turn and find yourself face to face with a rather handsome gentleman. You smile politely and take his hand, letting him guide you to the floor.

Lord Baxtor was a friendly gentleman. He had a dashing smile and seemed very pleased to be dancing with you.

"I saw you at Lady Danbury's soiree," he says.

"Oh? I do not recall meeting you."

"No, I think not. You spent most of the evening rather close to Mr Bridgerton's side."

"Oh... Yes. I must apologise. The first ball of the season, I always find rather daunting. I find comfort in being close to friends," you tell him.

"Yes, I must agree with you. You looked beautiful that night, as you do tonight."

You smile. "Thank you. You look very dashing tonight."

He smiles.

As you both dance, you don't notice Bridgerton's arriving. Violet guides Eloise over to the queen, followed by the two eldest sons.

"Tell me, brother, is there anyone here you haven't rejected?" Benedict teases Anthony.

Anthony does not look amused.

"You're the artist. Do you see anyone remotely inspiring?"

Benedict automatically finds himself looking in your direction despite not knowing you were there moments ago.

"We shall have our diamond tonight, and I shall have a wife," Anthony declares.

The greet the queen.

Eloise manages to make the queen laugh quite loudly with a comment about emeralds.

They bow and leave.

"If the queen, in fact, names Eloise the diamond, who will you marry then, brother?" Benedict asks.

"Hush, you."

The dance comes to an end, and Lord Baxtor escorts you off the floor. You smile at him. He lets go of your hand slowly, almost reluctantly, but he is a gentleman. You watch him walk away.

This seems like a promising start, at least.

You spot Benedict across the room, and he smiles at you. You return his smile. You would go over to him, but the fanfare plays and realise the queen is about to choose her diamond of the season.

You wait with the other to see who she will choose.

"Your presence is noted, and your queen most appreciative. Allow it to now be my honour to present you the season's diamond."

The room is quiet apart from a few whispers.

"Miss Edwina Sharma."

The room fills with applause. You watch the sisters who both smile. You are happy for them. Edwina is elegant, beautiful, has a charming smile, and seems to be a very wonderful person all around.

She will certainly have her hands full within the ton.

You don't notice Benedict, who comes up beside you.

"Disappointed?"

You look up. "Hardly."

"Though, you do have an admirer, it seems."

You follow Benedict's gaze to find Lord Baxtor watching you from across the room. You smile and turn away shyly.

"Then you must make sure to keep your distance, Benedict. I don't want to scare away any potential suitors."

Benedict gazes at you with a slightly confused look. He's not sure what you mean by your comment, but he doesn't respond to it. All he sees is you looking at the other gentleman with a soft smile.

Anthony takes Edwina for a dance around the room, where he is no doubt questioning her preferences.

Kate Sharma seems very unhappy to see them together.

You, however, have a splendid evening. When Benedict realises he is not holding your attention for the night, he leaves. Lord Baxtor wastes no time in coming over to talk to you.

You do not leave his side the rest of the night.

The next morning, you sit in your drawing room with your embroidery. Tea is sitting on the table beside you, and your mother is watching the window. She will hate it if you point out how obvious she is being. With wvery gentleman she sees pass the house she gets excited, only to discover them going down the street to another.

You find it amusing. Your mother looked forward to the next season. She took great joy in all the chaos society provided. You do so adore her when she is like this.

"Is there still time?" You mother asks, coming over to the couches.

"Yes, ma'am." The butler replies.

Your mother sighs and looks around the room. She hoped she had made the house comfortable enough for visitors. She was keen to help impress a suitor for you.

There is a knock at the door, and your mother clutches the armrest beside her with a sharp gasp. The butler leaves to answer the door, and you chuckle at the way your mother begins to fuss.

The butler returns. "A visitor, ma'am."

"Let them in." Your mother stands.

You put your embroidery down and stand up alongside her. You wait a few moments and then the vistor enters. You smile.

"Lord Baxtor."

He bows his head. "My lady."

Your mother smiles from ear to ear and excuses herself to the other side of the room to watch from there.

You invite Lord Baxtor to sit with you. You both take your seats and smile at one another.

"Hello."

"Hello," he chuckles.

"I was no expecting any callers."

"No?"

"I expected them all to be with Miss Sharma this morning," you confess.

"Though she is beautiful to be certain, and I'm sure a wonderful lady, I find myself wishing to spend more time in your presence."

You blush softly as you look at him.

"I haven't stopped thinking about our dance last night," he tells you.

"Oh?"

"Have you... perhaps thought of me?"

"Yes. I must admit I have."

He adjusts his position on the sofa and looks at you rather serious. "I must ask, Bridgerton will not likely be an issue, will he?"

"Why should he be an issue?"

"As much as I love a challenge, I do not wish to be up agaiant a Bridgerton, of all men."

"He is a friend of mine, but should you wish to see where this goes, a can assure you, Benedict Bridgerton will not be a problem."

Lord Baxtor smiles. "Good. Then can I hope to escort you to the races this afternoon?"

You smile. "I would be delighted."

Your mother watches with keen interest as you used this gentlemen seem to get along quite nicely. It was a promising match if she had ever seen one.

@callmemana - @lilscast - @imgondeletedis - @benedictbridgertonss - @clownsdiehard - @wxnterwidow333

@sillynilly27 - @autumn-slaves - @ben-has-arrived - @ajdelilah - @aadu2173

@booknerdlife - @tamlinrose - @sarahskywalker-amidala - @cheryyluv - @louschan - @lou-la-lou - @cultish-corner

@hopshusushi - @katherinejess - @nannabug - @afunkyfreshblog - @f0x33 - @dd122004dd -

@jupitervenusearthmars - @orchiidflwer - @bespinnn - @captainlunaxmen - @winchestersimpalababy - @acupnoodle

@ms-fandomgirl - @fablesrose - @anyaisinyourcloset - @meowzerzstuff - @orchiidflwer - @crazymar15

@cosmixstar - @bree3parchen - @berrnuu - @charmainemaclendon - @pinkpantheris - @krismdavis

@biancamde - @ifgslsofbsodbf - @kniselle - @berarenado - @grassclippers - @bwormie - @avengersgirllorianna

[arwenadreamer]

Jared is the most loving, caring person!

I've read it a thousand times online, but experiencing it in person puts it on anoher level!

Jared's schedule on Purcon 8 was merciless! (In fact, the whole schedule of Purcon was the one thing I have to criticise regarding this convention. Maybe I'll make another post about this.) For example on Sunday Jared had 15 Minutes of double photo (with Mark), then the J2 panel (30 Minutes) then M&G (30 Minutes) then photos 2,5 hours of photos (which run late, so it was close to three hours in the end), then a single panel (30 Minutes) without a single break. (There would have been a 20 minute break after the 2,5 hours of photos, but again, they were late.) Then he had half an hour break, before autos were from 16.25 to 18.25!

I don't know about US conventions, but at JiB there are more little breaks, and the photos, autos, etc. are in smaller patches. Like, 1 hour photos in the morning, then an hour of autos, then a panel, then photos again.

I don't think I could stand in a photo room and smile for 3 hours straight and give every fan the time of the day and a beautiful photo!

But Jared did! (And so did Jensen, btw.! Neither of them ever showing how tired they were. Or at least trying to hide it the best they could.)

So, @takikojou and I took our Jared photos on sunday. We were in line last, since we had the cheapest entrance tickets, which means Jared had taken pictures for nearly 2,5 hours. When we were in the photo room, we could clearly see how exhausted he was. Between pictures, his eyes drooped. Yet, he gave EVERY. SINGLE. FAN. his full attention. He made those 10 seconds special for everyone of nearly 2000 fans! One girl wanted to do a handholding pose with him and he squatted down (as he always does), but she asked him to stand tall please, which he did. And the whole room laughed. (This kind of good natured laugh.) So did Jared. He picked up the energy and still had fun. Then a man came and asked him to do the WOW fingers. Jared clearly loved that, they made a bit of fun about it. Jared clapped the fan on the back in parting and said "Loved that pose!". @takikojou had an amazing op, but that's her story to tell.

Then it was my turn. I wanted to do a drinking pose. He listened attentively (For some reason we were not allowed to show pictures on the phone of what we wanted, because they said it would take more time? I think it takes more time to explain, but oh well.) Then he did the pose and looked me dead in the eye. For my second photo I asked him to choose the pose. He said "I'll stand behind you", then turned me around and held me withe both arms around my shoulders. And then he pressed with so much strengh, held me sooooooooo tight! I grin like a lunatic on the pic, but who can blame me? I then turned halfway around to say "Thank you", before walking away, and he stroked my arm and said "Thank you, darling!"

The pictures turned out wonderful. And all of that after 2,5 hours of nonstop pictures! Not a single photo he took shows how tired he was!

He came on stage right after photos for his panel and was like "I'm gonna sit, I need that now", falling into the chair right away. Yet, he continued to give us an awesome panel. Seriously, my brain would have been mush by now, yet he gave clever, insightful answers as always and put his full energy into that panel.

We don't deserve that man!

All that goes for Jensen too, btw! But he had a much better schedule with little breaks and rather an hour photos, then something else, then photos again. Which is why I was especially blown away by Jaredˋs dedication. But that doesn't change the fact, that Jensen, too, gives every fan his full attention and makes the most of those 10 seconds and of the panels and everything. They are both amazing like that!

[dunmeshistash]

i'm reading your adventurers' timelines again and a couple of things jumped out to me:

chilchuck, namari and shuro had joined year 511 and it's currently 514, so they had only known each other/ been friends for around ~3 years. and chilchuck had barely shared any personal info at that time Imfao

shuro proposed in year 513 (2 yrs after getting to know falin), falin said she would think about it and then got eaten by the red dragon at 514 (rip). i guess it makes sense he proposes again before going back east since he never got a reply for that whole year

marcille and falin have known each other for 11 years 🥺 they met year 510 and there's a 3 year gap when falin ran away and went traveling with laios

laios left for school at 12 and only reunited with falin after 9 years 😭

kabru and his party had only started working together for 2 years, with the exception of rin who he's known for 13 years. despite that laios' old party has progressed so much further in the dungeon lmao

Yeah, they really hadn't been together for that long when the story starts and from what I understand they kept it pretty proffessional among themselves? So no wonder they weren't that close (and that Laios thought only of Shuro as a friend cause Shuro didn't create any boundaries between them unlike the rest)

These are very interesting observations! The more you think about how long ago/for how long things happened I think perspectives change.

Kabru has been adventuring for much less time compared to Laios considering Laios was also in the gold stripping thing, but it's kinda impressive he got the people of his party (especially the long lived) to trust him to fast too.

Fun fact, did you know Dia and the Shadow Governor are related? And that he was the one to introduce her to Kabru's Party?

[thisissirius]

spoilers, spoilers, spoilers. i'm obsessed with the idea of eddie's breakdown.

supplication eddie/buck, chris (past tommy/buck). stylistic depictions of eddie's mental state. hurt, hurt, hurt and comfort. in which eddie loses chris, himself, and his tentative hold on his mental state. buck's there for him, for them, as always.

“What am I supposed to do now?” Buck doesn’t answer.

Eddie doesn’t know who he is without Chris. Actually. He does. He does know. He’s been without Chris and he doesn’t want to be that person again. Except this time it’s Chris that leaves. Chris went with his parents, looking back once, Eddie’s heart breaking at his feet. With Buck’s hand on his shoulder, his father’s admonishments ringing in his ears, and his son walking away, Eddie didn’t think there was much farther to fall.

Frank stares at him.

Eddie stares back.

“Eddie. I can’t help you if you don’t help me.”

Eddie says nothing.

A sigh. “Perhaps Buck—”

“No,” Eddie says immediately.

Buck is happy. Buck and Tommy, two of the best guys Eddie knows, are together and happy. Buck smiles more, lives more, and feels more comfortable in his skin.

Now that Cap’s out of hospital and recovering, everything as close to normal as it’s gonna get, Buck’s living for himself for the first time in—Eddie doesn’t even know.

What he does know is this; Buck can’t help, shouldn’t help.

Eddie can fix himself, can make this work without crawling to his best friend to help.

The house is too empty? Eddie will just make sure he’s rarely in it. Carla checks in on him? Eddie will just make sure he misses her calls. His parents messaging to tell him—well, those he’ll at least look at, because it might be something about Chris.

Eddie is fine, fine, fine.

Eddie remembers standing in a shop with Chris and Ana and feeling his heart race, pound, cascade away from him. He remembers thinking heart attack and being so mad at himself when he realised it was a panic attack instead.

Now, standing at his kitchen sink with a hand pressed to his chest, he’s just as mad at himself. He can’t even keep control, can’t stop himself from feeling Chris’ absence, from the press of loneliness.

Frank looks him in the eye when he says, “I can’t sign you back to work, Eddie.”

Eddie doesn’t snap until he’s sitting in his car. There’s Chris’ discarded bag on the floor on the passenger side. A takeout carton shoved into the gap between door and seat. Touches of his son everywhere. Touches of Buck, still, in his car.

He can’t go back to work. He doesn’t have a son. His best friend is—

Eddie is fine, fine, fine.

“The station will still be there, Eddie,” Bobby says gently.

Fuck you, Eddie thinks silently, because it’s not Bobby’s fault. Nothing will sill be there.

Buck glares at him. “When were you going to say something?”

Two weeks leave. For now. Until Eddie can figure out what the hell is going on.

“I’m going to see Chris,” Eddie says, injecting enough enthusiasm into his voice that he hopes Buck can’t read it. “I know it’s only been a couple of weeks, but—"

He’s lying to Buck.

He’s lying to Buck.

To Buck.

God.

“I’m sure it’ll be good for you both,” Buck says, frown giving way to a smile. He has a date with Tommy in about twenty minutes. Eddie knows because he saw the plan in his phone. “I’ll have to join you next time. I miss him.”

Eddie nods, because he doesn’t trust himself to speak. Buck will have to leave soon if he’s to make his date with Tommy and—

“Right,” Buck says, slipping his phone into his pocket. He pauses, because of course he does, looking at Eddie. “You okay?”

“I will be.” It’s not a lie; one day, probably, Eddie will be fine. “Go, have fun.”

Buck grins, laughs a little, bashful, and god, Eddie loves that he’s so happy, that he’s secure. He deserves it. “Thanks. I’ll speak to you when you get back?”

Eddie pulls him into a hug, because what else can he do. Maybe he clings a little too hard, maybe Buck presses back just as tight because some part of him senses something. Forcing himself to let go, Eddie finds his smile a touch more real because it’s Buck. “Go. I’ll be alright.”

“You better,” Buck says quietly. He gives Eddie one more glance and then bounces out of the house. Bounces. Child.

It takes a while for Eddie to move away from the door.

The house is quiet.

The house is lonely.

The house is empty.

Eddie’s empty.

Eddie’s lonely.

Eddie’s quiet.

Eddie’s phone is cradled in his hand.

The screen flashes and he knows he should answer, knows he should do something. Pick up? Speak to whoever it is?

Chris?

Buck?

Eddie closes his fist around it and drops it onto the floor.

It’s fine.

Eddie’s fine.

Eddie’s

                                fine, fine, fine.

“Eddie?”

Something bangs, a splinter of wood.

Eddie’s door, probably.

Did he lock it?

Maybe.

Maybe not.

“God, what—”

The voice is familiar. Cherished.

“Eddie, I need you to open your eyes.”

Why.

“Please. For me?”

Who.

“It’s Buck, Eddie. It’s me. Look at me. Please, look at me.”

It’s an effort to open an eye.

“That’s it.”

Buck looks—good. Panicked, desperate. Good.

Eddie doesn’t feel good. He doesn’t feel right.

“Buck,” he croaks.

“God, Eddie, you,” Buck looks over his shoulder. The bag is still by the door where he left it. “Chris called. He said you hadn’t called—you lied to me? About going to see him?”

Eddie doesn’t know what he’s talking about.

Buck shakes him a little, fingers against his chin. “Eddie?”

“I miss him,” Eddie says, his voice breaking. “But I—I can’t let him see me, not like this.”

“It’s been two weeks.” Buck looks stricken. “Eddie, Eddie, tell me you haven’t been here alone for two weeks?”

Eddie can’t. It would be a lie and he doesn’t want to do that to Buck again.

“Eddie.” Buck’s face crumples, tears in his eyes. “Why didn’t you say anything?”

“You’re happy,” Eddie whispers. He touches Buck’s face. His hand is shaking. Why is it shaking? “I didn’t want to mess that up.”

“God,” Buck says again. Eddie should tell him he shouldn’t blaspheme, but then he’s being manhandled into a sitting position. Arms come around him. They’re strong, Buck’s strong.

Eddie opens his mouth.

Closes it.

“Buck,” he manages eventually. “I think there’s something wrong with me.”

Buck sobs, a hand coming to rest against the back of Eddie’s head. He’s cradled. Held. Loved. “I’m here, Eddie.”

Eddie breaks.

His feelings cascade, break, and he folds into Buck, buries his face in Buck’s shoulder and cries.

Buck holds him, protects him, whispers.

I’ve got you.

Let it out.

It will be alright.

Buck is watching him.

Eddie’s skin crawls. “Buck—”

“If you ever lie to me again,” Buck starts, cuts himself off.

“You remember that puzzle we did with Chris a few weekends ago?”

Frowning, Buck nods. “Yeah.”

“There were pieces missing,” Eddie says, staring down at his hands. They’re curled around his glass, but it feels like he’s not touching anything, like he’s not holding onto it at all. Maybe it will fall. He tries not to let it. “I feel like the missing pieces.”

Blowing out a breath, Buck looks down at his phone. He holds it out to Eddie. It says Frank and the betrayal is swift. Before Eddie can say anything, Buck says, “Eddie, take it,” and his voice is strong, unyielding.

“Okay,” Eddie says. “Okay.”

Eddie doesn’t know who he is without Chris.

He doesn’t want to learn, but he has to. Has to listen to Frank, to speak, to unwrap himself, to talk, to talk, to listen.

Buck is waiting in the parking lot, leaning against the car.

“You have a date with Tommy,” Eddie says slowly.

“Nope,” Buck says, standing straight. He looks happy, still, but the words coming out of his mouth; “I’m a free man.”

Eddie panics, feels something else cascade away from him.

Immediately, Buck is in his space. “Eddie, no, hey no.”

Hands on his face, thumbs against the curve of his cheeks. Buck’s eyes boring into his. “Buck.”

“Tommy and I, what we had was fun, good for me, but you, god Eddie, you’re everything to me.”

Everything.

Can he be everything when he doesn’t even know himself?

“Let’s go home,”  Buck says, “call Chris.”

Chris.

“Dad!” Chris is smiling, clutching he iPad and looking happy.

Is it Texas?

Being away from Eddie?

A hand rests on the back of his neck.

“Buck,” Chris says, just as enthusiastic. “I miss you.”

“I miss you too, buddy,” Buck says, dropping into the seat next to Eddie. “Eddie?”

“Chris,” Eddie says, and feels something slide into place. He’s still a father, still here. “Are you having fun in Texas?”

Chris goes quiet, eyes dropping. “They said you were in hospital.”

Eddie closes his eyes. “Chris—”

“He was,” Buck says quietly. He’s done this before. Too many times. Eddie owes so much, so much, he can never be worthy of whatever brought Buck into his life. “But he’s home and I’m taking care of him.”

“Good,” Chris says decisively. “I want to see you smile, Dad, and mean it.”

Choked, Eddie doesn’t know what to say. The fingers on his neck stroke, soothe, and Eddie breathes. “I will, Chris. Promise.”

Chris beams. “I wanna come back home soon, Dad.”

“You will,” Eddie promises, because he may have broken, scattered, but slowly he’s piecing himself back together. “We’ll have a party when you get back.”

A cheer and Chris is off, talking about Texas and their family, and it washes over Eddie. He grounds himself; Buck’s hand, the steady cadence of his son’s voice, the house that feels comfortable in the moment.

Buck kisses him softly, cradles his head in his hands.

Eddie feels cherished.

Safe.

“Buck,” he says.

“Sweetheart,” Buck replies, like a benediction. “Let’s go get our son.”

Yes, Eddie’s heart sings. Yes, yes, yes.

.the end

i'm so emotional dlshfdsjfhkj.

ao3 link

[foreseersgaze]

— On this note, I love Zayne's medical talk sooo much 🥺

— Every time Zayne talks about something nerdy he read in the library, or whenever he just randomly brings up facts about the heart or heart surgery I just have the worst urge to suck him off, so here's a little drabble about doing just that.

— 18+ only! MDNI!!!

It's a lazy Sunday morning—one of those rare days where Zayne isn't working his ass off in the hospital, but of course, he chooses to spend his time reading up on one of his books specializing in knowledge of the heart while you sit next to him playing video games.

You hear a casual hmm, coming from him, and, curiously, you press the pause button on your controller and look over at him, peering over the pages of his book, wondering what he's so interested in.

Zayne flicks his gaze over to you, looking over the rims of his silver-lined glasses when you lean in so closely and he raises an eyebrow, a small smirk tugs on the corners of his lips before closing his book, which makes you huff.

"You know you can ask what I'm reading instead of putting your nose quite literally into my book, right?" He quips, and you roll your eyes at his smart remark. You roll over onto your stomach and your legs move to dangle into the air while listening to him.

"Yeah, yeah... sorry for taking interest," you mutter before looking over at the cover of his book, which looks very familiar. You squint your eyes at the cover, recognizing that he's definitely read this book before. Now it's your turn to poke fun at him. "Besides, haven't you read this book already?" You retort, a small grin forming on your lips when you see him take off his glasses with an amused sigh.

"I have, actually. I'm just refreshing my mind on a few heart cancer facts," he replies, folding his glasses and hanging them over the collar of his shirt.

Your eyebrows raise at this; your interest is immediately piqued. You look up at him with wide eyes and you rest your chin on the palms of your hands while dangling your feet into the air, already wanting to listen intently.

"Oh? Do share them with me, Dr. Zayne." You smirk, and you can feel a rush of warmth going to the apples of your cheeks when Zayne begins to talk about a few facts that he knows that might interest you.

"Well, did you know that heart cancer is extremely rare? In fact, it's so rare that we at the Asko Hospital see a case of heart cancer once per year..."

You continue to listen to Zayne talk, watching his every move. His eyes avoid yours, just staring at the TV, looking at the paused video game screen while he talks, and every now and then, his gaze will shift back to yours to see if you're still listening to him, which, of course you are. You can't help but not listen, always finding his vast knowledge of the heart extremely sexy.

While he talks, one of your hands mindlessly begins to wander up and down his thigh, just keeping your eyes on him. He feels this, so his gaze turns to yours and he raises an eyebrow, figuring you're up to something, but he's not sure what. He pauses.

"...What do you think you're doing?" He asks, his eyes narrowing on your hand before his green eyes flick over to your eyes, trying to read your mind. He has a good guess on what you're trying to do, but, he's not quite sure since you're clearly still showing interest in his heart knowledge.

You can't help but giggle in reply. "Nothing. Just keep talking."

Zayne hesitates for a moment, but he goes on anyway. "...Right. So, anyway, still, other cancers can spread to your heart, but..." He resumes talking, and your gaze is still focused on his lips, listening eagerly to every single word he says while your hand slowly slides up his thigh, and starts palming at the growing erection in his pajama bottoms, which quickly makes him stop talking as he lets out a groan and heavy breath.

"W-What... what are you..." He groans again, and he looks down at your hand as you palm him through his clothes. He wants to capture your wrist and turn the tide on you, but as waves of pleasure fill him, he realizes why exactly you're doing this.

"Keep talking, Zayne," you say, looking up at him with those sweet, pretty eyes of yours, blinking innocently as if your hand is still underneath your chin and not palming his hard dick through his pajamas.

He huffs, his nose turning a slight pink and a slight grin appears on his face.

"Really? You want me to keep talking?" Amusement is thick in his voice when he notices his realization is correct. "It seems you truly are interested in what I have to say," he says lowly, as he brings a hand down to cup your face gently, a calloused thumb swipes over your bottom lip which makes you immediately heat up.

You nod slowly, and, moving away from his hand, you climb over to lay between Zayne's legs and gently pull on the drawstrings of his pajama bottoms so you can pull them down. You grin when you see the hard imprint of his dick in his underwear—knowing your touches worked while he was talking—so you gently pull his underwear down too and let out an amused hum when he's fully erect in front of you, long and thick, with veins at the base of his dick that make your mouth water.

"Yes, yes, now keep talking," you urge while taking him in your hand, wanting him to keep talking not only because you genuinely find it so interesting, but also because for some reason, it makes you so fucking horny to hear him talk about this.

Zayne huffs at this, wanting to engage in having sex with you and be present in this, but, since you keep insisting, he gives in since you clearly love it so much.

"Fine..." He sighs, continuing from earlier. "...Other cancers can... fuck." His breath escapes lowly from his throat when you suddenly surprise him by gently sucking on his tip, just hardly suckling on it while your tongue flicks on it gently.

You look up at him while sucking on it, keeping those wide eyes of interest on him, making him realize that he needs to continue to keep your mouth on him.

"O-Other cancers can metastasize, or spread, to your heart, but cancer doesn't usually form within the heart itself..." He gets more breathy as you suck harder with every word, and a deft hand goes to grip your hair, wanting to guide you down his cock, but he lets you suck him off how you want, keeping his hand still and firm in your hair. "...A-And treatments like chemotherapy that look for... ah, damn." He grunts when he feels you suddenly suck harder on his tip.

He takes in a sharp inhale, hating how good you are with your mouth, because he's feeling close already. He swallows thickly, continuing.

"...For malignancies that can damage the heart's tissue..." He groans, and his long fingers grip your hair even tighter which makes you hum against his tip, focusing more on the underside of that sensitive spot, making him grunt. "...You know, if you keep this up, you're going to make me cum," he says almost bluntly before groaning again when you hallow your cheeks around him.

"Damn... I... and, heart cancer results from the tumor angiosarcoma..." He continues to get more breathy and he grunts, gripping your hair tightly when you finally move that tongue of yours on his sensitive tip, making him throb and quickly release ropes of his hot, white cum into your mouth. He takes deep breaths when he finishes, his head falling back against the headboard of the bed, and you pull away, grinning once you swallow all of his cum.

He's silent for a bit, trying to catch his breath before he looks over at you with a grin.

"Did you know studies also show that men who have sex twice a week or more are less likely to develop heart disease?"

[blushstarot]

PICK A CARD: how does your favorite character feel about you?

Anon request ^^ // what if you met your favorite character (or the first one you think of)? what will be their impression of you?

Pick whichever picture you feel more attracted to and skip to that pile.

Pile 1

ace of swords, the tower, six of pentacles.

They think that you're someone who is connected to them on an intellectual level, or at least that you have a similar mindset. They think really highly of you! They see you as this person who has faced difficulties but still manages to still be kind enough to help others when they need it. They may even see you as someone with great knowledge and wisdom, someone that is determined, assertive, has a sense of justice, and is always thinking of new things (ideas, projects, plans). And in some way that last thing also gives them the impression that you can let yourself fall in unrealistic goals and dreams.

**As in all the PACs, just take what resonates and leave what doesn't, this is for entertainment only, so have fun with it!

Pile 2

ace of cups (reversed), nine of swords, temperance (reversed).

I see you meeting in some kind of social event, it could be a party, or a fancy dinner, either way, it's a gathering where there's alcohol involved. And I get some negative emotions on their part, not towards you, but to the gathering itself, maybe they're not a very social person, or didn't like an aspect of the event so they didn't want to be there when they met you, and that made them, see you in a negative light for a while. When you tried to make small talk you noticed that something was bothering them, and after making some small talk you realized that it was better to leave them alone and not bother them. The next day, in retrospect, they probably thought about your interaction and started worrying that they came across like an asshole, or that they were too mean with you; so most likely they started to feel anxiety on what kind of impression they left on you, which probably caused them to overthink too much, to the point of having trouble sleeping or having nightmares. Because how would they not feel bad, this really nice person came to talk to them, probably looking to be friends, and we're really polite and understanding of them, even thought they were being really dry in the conversation and answering with an angry/annoying tone. They most likely would try to talk to you if they see you again, and hope to not come off as rude again, I get the feeling that they would like to be friends and apologize for your first conversation.

**As in all the PACs, just take what resonates and leave what doesn't, this is for entertainment only, so have fun with it!

Pile 3

Six of wands (reversed), queen of wands, ace of wands.

They approached you with I'll intentions at first, I'm not sure with what in mind exactly, but nothing too serious probably, maybe they wanted to make you a joke or just wanted to take advantage of you in a please-do-this-favor-for-me kind of way. But then when they got to know you more, they saw you as this very positive/optimistic person, really outgoing, wanting to help everyone, cheerful, and mature/wise. That made them reconsider their first impression of you (someone not so smart/easy to trick), and started treating you more genuinely and caring than before. I don't really see them coming clean on their own with what were their first intentions to approach you, but if you for some reason decide to ask them about it, they would tell you the truth and pray you forgive them so they can continue being your friend.

**As in all the PACs, just take what resonates and leave what doesn't, this is for entertainment only, so have fun with it!

This took so long because I decided to procrastinate instead of finishing this reading, it's been in the draft since the same day that I uploaded the last one, so I the first pile feels a little off compared to the other two, that's probably why.

Thanks for reading! Let me know what you think.

Bye byeee ✨

You can find more of my PACs on my master list, and if you have any suggestions on future PACs you want to see me do, you can send me an ask.

[jq37]

FH Junior Year Post-Season Thoughts

With another season of Fantasy High in the books and my recaps all finished, I wanted to do an overview of my thoughts on the season as a whole. Even though I feel generally positive about my experience with the season, there are a few things I think maybe could have been done differently narratively or mechanically. This isn't to criticize the way the season went down or to backseat DM/Play. More my combined ten years of college for textual analysis and storytelling bleeding through, haha. 

I first want to start with the things I thought worked really well.

Fantasy High has "High" right in its title but, in past seasons (and especially Sophomore Year), not as much time as you'd think was spent actually at school and even if it was spent at school, there wasn't much time spent in class or engaging with the realities of being a student. This season really dug into the academic consequences of skipping your classes all the time and the realities of needing to do a ton of extra stuff to try for a scholarship and I think that was a refreshing thing to highlight for a change. Being more scared at flunking out than the dragon that's trying to eat you feels very emotionally resonant. Real "High School Is Killing Me" vibes for anyone who's a fan of NPMD. 

Even though Fantasy High is a show that has some deep emotional beats and strong character arcs, it's first and foremost a comedy show. From the jump, everyone was generating bit after bit that had me cracking up as usual. "Little girly dog collar" is one of the funniest combinations of words I can think of. I think it was Siobhan who said that this was the goofy season and, having seen it, I'd have to agree with her. It never failed to make me laugh and it was always a highlight of my week.  The cast just has great table chemistry that I love to watch no matter what they're doing. 

Watching some of these high level combat encounters is as close as I'll get to understanding people watching sports. Even though combat is generally my least fave part of D&D, I think the cast really killed it this season with how cleverly they played and Brennan came up with some really great combat encounters. Special shout outs to Baron's Game and The Last Stand for their unique mechanics.  

This is going to be one that's on the other list as well because my feelings are mixed, but I genuinely do like the downtime mechanic and how it forces hard choices. I think it's an interesting way to connect a mechanic to the story and cultivate stressful atmosphere for the season.

I have problems with the execution but I love the Rat Grinders in concept. I think as early as season 1 I was hoping that we'd meet a party that was like the Bizarro Bad Kids and the idea of a party that's farming XP instead of going on crazy adventures is a strong concept. Likewise, I think a character that's jealous because of your "cool" (read: tragic) backstory is also a fun trait for an unhinged antagonist in this kind of setting.

This is me absolutely showing my bias but I adored the Abernant Sisters content this season. I dunno if Siobhan specifically asked Brennan to not put her on a bus with the other beloved NPCs or what but I'm so glad she stuck around and we got the development we did. It was almost entirely ancillary to the plot but there was this clear pattern of Aelwyn getting softer and sweeter towards Adaine over the course of the season, from the guarded, "Enjoy the nemesis ward," to, full I love you's and, "I'd take them to get you." It was way more focus than I expected considering that Aelwyn completed the bulk of her arc last season and a lot of the time, a redemption arc basically ends after the big gesture (in this case, Aelwyn taking a magic blast for Adaine in Sophomore Year). So the fact that we got to see all of these sweet moments of them reestablishing their relationship outside of do or die moments was such a pleasant surprise. Again, I fully admit I am extremely biased, but this was my top wishlist item and the season overdelivered so there's a baseline happy I'm always gonna be with Junior Year. 

OK, so moving on to things I things I think could have been tweaked.

Even though I liked the downtime system and the pressures it created, it also squeezed out the chance for more casual PC to NPC interactions that would usually be more common because they were semi-locked behind the relationship track and there wasn't an obvious benefit to roll for Relationships (as opposed to something like Academics which was crucial for not flunking out). Making the mechanical benefit more clear would have helped that (even if it meant Brennan didn't get his reveal--which he ended up just telling them anyway so might as well do it early). The other thing is that the consequence of a rage token was so bad that of course they spent all season avoiding getting one. Things might have gone differently if the consequences had been a bit more obscured, like in Neverafter. And it could have been a nice parallel to the Rat Grinders to take this unknown resource that makes things easier for you but is also having this negative effect. Then it could be like dang we did the same thing they did unknowingly. 

I mentioned this in my recap but I'll talk about it again. It is a little confusing to me that we did the Ankarna subplot right after we did the very similar Cassandra subplot. It took up so much time this season which I don't think is an issue in and of itself, it's just that we literally just went through some extremely similar beats last season. Why double up on this same storyline when there's so much new ground to cover? Or if we're going to raise a god, why not make it a different kind of god? One theory I had early on was that the Rat Grinders were trying to raise their own god to one-up the Bad Kids but instead of raising a chill, misunderstood Cass type, they accidentally raised a god who was erased for a good reason and got in over their heads. 

It's fun for there to be connections between seasons but sometimes it's like, OK that's a *lot* of coincidences. Like the god who your rivals is trying to raise *happens* to be the wife of your cleric's god and also *happens* to be the god of the fiend trapped in your friend's mom's chest and that fiend *happens* to be the relative on your bard's dad's side which is *also* the reason she is randomly cursed? That's a LOT of red string connecting plot points. As unhinged as Kipperlilly is about coveting Riz's backstory if I saw that go down I'd be like you have *got* to be kidding me.  

The mystery elements didn't feel like they clicked as well as they did in other seasons. I think that's partially because Porter's plan was so convoluted (seriously, I made another post about how haphazard his plan was) and had all these moving parts and we didn't get clear answers for a lot of mechanical things like how the rage crystals actually work and when they were implanted and stuff. You had stuff like Devil's Honey which I think is super cool as a thing that exists in the world but ended up being an element that just led the players down the wrong path and had a relatively small payoff (that Porter was using it to lie to Ankarna). I think it's plausible that a forgotten god would be willing to listen to anyone saying the right things without introducing this element. (As opposed to, for instance, Ambrosia which has a very clear connection to what's going on and is a solid clue that someone is flirting with aspirations of godhood.) 

The Porter reveal came so late in the season that even though it was a fun/challenging fight, there wasn't a lot of emotional weight behind killing him. It was basically just dunking on a teacher Fig has always hated who was also mean to Gorgug so screw him. Which, valid of course. But the Bad Kids were never going to react as strongly to Porter as they were to the Rat Grinders so putting Porter in the prime villain spot isn't necessarily what I would have done if I wanted the fight to be more than just a brawl--especially since we've done "School admin with student minions" already in S1. I don't mind the full circle callback but it would have been nice to pick something else for the sake of variety. We haven't had a child mastermind yet and I think Kipperlilly could have been a great candidate for that. My friend suggested that it would have been fun if Kipperlilly was trying to become a god instead of just being Porter's underling and I agree. "I'm not anyone's chosen one so I'll choose myself," is still within her established jealousy and Type A tendencies. If we want to keep Porter involved since that was Brennan's gift to Emily, maybe have it be that instead of Kipperlilly working for him, he's working for her. Like Artemis Fowl vibes! And the Rat Grinders can be varying levels of on board--from true believe to redeemable. I don't think Brennan planned for the Bad Kids to ever redeem her so might as well go full megalomaniacal mastermind with her and make her The Villain if she's not gonna be nuanced anyway. If My Little Pony can do it and send a literal child to Tartarus for pony treason (or whatever Cozy Glow did), Fantasy High can too. 

Continuing from the above, if we have the Porter fight in place of the Grix fight (a la Daybreak) and don't use Ankarna, that gives way more time for the Bad Kids to investigate the Rat Grinders throughout the season and it would mean that they would have their personalities developed a lot more. With the limited downtime, they Bad Kids didn't have a lot of time to spend on these kids who were just hating on them for no good reason (valid). But if you cleared their plate of the god hunt stuff, they'd have more time for this. And if they weren't all rage zombies to varying degrees, it would be easier to see them as characters. Besides Kipperlilly (and, funnily enough, Mary Ann) we don't really have a good read on what these kids are actually like. The little time we spent with them all season was kind of a wash if them breaking out of rage means their personalities got laundered too. Anyway, regardless of how their loyalties ended up shaking out, it would have been fun for them to be more than the minions that they were in canon. As funny as it is for them to just kinda be XP farming losers, they did have the potential to be more interesting in their own right if they weren't just Porter's minions. And again, we've done adults forcing or coercing children into being minions in Freshman and Sophomore Year already. Lemme see some self-created child maniacs! (Or, peer pressured child maniacs. That's cool too. The Lucy/Kipperlilly dynamic is way more interesting to me if it's like girl, I would take a bullet for you but I CANNOT walk this path with you any further in response to *I* will be a god and you can be *MY* champion.)

Anyway, those are my thoughts! Like I said, I have my points that I think could have been tightened, but overall an enjoyable season and I will be glued to my screen if they decide to close out with Senior Year! 

[earlgrey24]

Top 5 underappreciated historical figures!

Thanks for the ask! This one was super fun, but also super difficult to answer. I've purposefully avoided mentioning the ladies of the French Revolution, since I have another question specifically about them lined up.

With that being said, in no particular order:

Fulvia

Anyone in the classics circle likely knows much more about her than I do, but I'm so glad I've discovered her through Tumblr! All of the things I've learned about her so far have been so interesting. It's incredible to see how much political (and military) power a Roman woman was able to yield despite living in a deeply patriarchal society.

(also, the part of me that loves drama really appreciates the story about her stabbing Cicero's tongue with hairpins after the proscriptions and Octavian's atrocious poem about her)

2. Émilie du Châtelet

Also hardly a surprise for anyone who's been following me for a while. Again, the fact that I've only relatively recently found out that there was a female mathematician and physicist in the fist half of the 18th century with such significant contributions to the field makes me almost feel as if I've been lied to.

She is special to me both because she was incredibly smart (she was able to understand Newton like few other people in her time and she spoke so many languages!) but there's also something about her writing that makes her feel deeply human and relatable. I've read some of her texts, and not only are they written in a beautiful prose but they're also incredibly moving. Her view on how to achieve happiness in life is one of the best I've ever came across, and her arguments for the education of women always make me feel so emotional...

...when she says that it was only after she realised that the circle of (male) French intellectuals accepted her among themselves and treated her as equal that she realised she too "might be a thinking creature"... I don't know, there's something about it that always gets to me.

Okay, time to introduce some male historical figures as well! This one is a residue from the time when I was really into the American Revolution.

3. Peter Stephen Du Ponceau

He was probably the only one in Baron von Steuben's original group that was able to speak decent English when they first arrived in the US to join the revolutionary war, which a) makes him quite important b) is kind of funny to think about.

But what I especially like about him is that he was a talented linguist who seemed to have genuine respect for other cultures, which let's face it, was quite rare in his times. While taking part in the American Revolutionary War, he recorded and studied the languages of Native American People. How cool is that?

(He was also potentially queer and I do have a soft spot for queer history)

Okay, guess should bring up someone interesting from Czech history as well. I fully confess that my own country's history is not necessarily my favourite area of study, but for her, I'll always make an exception:

4. Milena Jesenská

Probably most well known as Kafka's (kind of?) girlfriend/pen pal, but there is so much more to her story!

She was a writer and a journalist during the first half of the 20th century. She was really talented and soon made a reputation for herself, which let's face it, wasn't an easy thing to do for women in her time.

After Czechia became occupied by Nazi Germany, she joined the resistance movement and helped Jewish families to escape. She was later transported to a concentration camp, where she worked as a nurse and was said to have been "a moral support for other prisoners". She unfortunately died there when she was only 47. Still, what a life!

5. John Polidori

He's not necessarily my number one favourite person but I'd argue he is one of the most unappreciated figures. Vampires in fiction are massively popular but he rarely gets credited as one of its first authors. (Also the theory that Lord Ruthven, the charismatic, immoral aristocrat featured in The Vampyre is heavily based off on Lord Byron is not only entirely plausible but also quite funny).

Whenever I read something about the Geneva Squad, I always end up feeling kind of bad for him. As a foreigner, someone who was of a lower social status and - since he technically came along as Byron's personal physician - a paid employee, it just seems to me like he was never actually fully part of the group. Maybe I'm wrong, but to me, he felt kind of like a perpetual outsider. Lord Byron also got the credit for writing The Vampyre that should have gone to Polidori.

He was of course far from a perfect saint, with his drug and gambling addiction, but I still can't help but feel that he deserved better.

[meetinginsamarra]

mayprompts2024 - a heartfelt Thank You

This May has rushed by so fast, I can't really believe it. It's been absolutely crazy.

I've been intrigued by the concept of the may prompts again just like I've been last year but I thought I would not get to write much because my IRL May 2024 would be packed with work and well, real life.

But, starting with the first prompt "open", the inspiration just flowed. I managed to write every single day (with one exception due to a medical emergency and I did two prompts the day after so that doesn't really count for me).

Most days, I carved out at least 1.5 up to 2.5 hours only for my writing (I'm slow and I want to make it good) and I really don't know how I managed that but the urge to write was so strong that I had actually no choice but to comply.

I wrote two AU's, the hilarious Bed Shop AU `The Perfect Place' and the tattoo shop AU 'White Pony Tattoo' which is a bit more serious but still fun to read. Both stories surprised myself every day. I am ridiculously proud of these. All is/will be on AO3 and I'll make a masterpost later.

I had a such great time. But it wouldn't, couldn't have been that fantastic fandom experience, the feeling of being - more than ever - part of a community, welcoming and supportive and egging each other on in the very best of ways without all of you.

This month especially have I felt so strongly that you all are my found family. I love you all and the fandom so much and now I can't see the keyboard because I have real tears in my eyes because I've become so sentimental.

Thank you @calaisreno for hosting this event and channeling the writing muses and all of the sentiments connected with it.

Thank all of you who have filled prompts, some provoking utter joy, others deep pain and all the feelings in between. I'm not going to tag people here because I don't want to leave anybody out by accident. I've (hopefully) reblogged all that has been created and also, you know who you are.

Thank all of you who have reblogged my writings and/or interacted with them via comments, emojis or added gifs. It makes me so happy to evoke something with what I come up with. No tagging again, you know who you are as well.

All the love to you, Samarra

[exhaslo]

Hi! I've been reading off and on and I loved puzzle pieces and I'm excited for Overtime! I do have a ask if you have the time.

The reader is a spider person and has a couple friends and is good at her job in alxmex. (I don't think I spelled that right forgive me.) but when she reports or gets missions from Miguel she clams up and doesn't really talk much just stoic and shy (definitely trying to fight the crush and just staring at him.) and he notices how different it is from the watch footage and what everyone says about reader. Layla figures out she has a crush and tells Miguel. Plot twist though the reader stays late practicing web moves in the gym and goes to the locker room/showers to rense off and change and there's Miguel waiting for her after his shower cause it's Miguel he likes to make people squirm. (I assume the gym locker room/shower there is unisex for reasons only for the plot 👀) So Miguel's there in just towel looking at the reader, and the virgin reader (cause of course she is.) is trying to be polite and not look at him and then chaos can reupt.

The idea popped into my head and I really enjoy your writing so I think it would be really fun to see how you interpret it. In my head I definitely see him going "you can look you know?" And the reader is just refusing and maybe he has to make her. I'll let you decide that lol. Anyway I really love your writing and I hope when you get this you have a good rest of your day or it gets better! 😊

Haha, the plot armor is STRONG with this one! Also, thank you! I'm glad you enjoy my series~

Warning: MINORS DNI, some smut, mentioned of sex, teasing, touch-starved Miguel

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

What would it take for your eyes to gaze only at him?

Despite what everyone believes about you, Miguel could only see one side. The shy and quiet you that could barely stutter a word whenever the two of you were alone. Your gaze always avoiding his, but yet, always stares whenever you thought Miguel wasn't looking.

So what would it take for you to open to up him?

This all started with you. Miguel knew that you were always a good worker. Everyone loved you and always praised you, but you always gave Miguel the cold shoulder. At least that was what he thought at first.

Miguel remembered it like it was yesterday. You had done a mission for him and there was barely anyone at the Spider Society. You were so quiet and embarrassed that you stumbled and fell against Miguel when delivering your report.

Your hands against his chest. That sweet voice of yours apologizing profusely as those glowing orbs of yours stared into his. It felt like an eternity. Miguel almost didn't want to let you go. He had wanted you to keep touching him.

It had been weeks since that encounter, and Miguel could only get a brush of your hand ever now and then.

So, what would it take for you to touch him again?

It was getting to the point where Miguel was becoming obsessive. He had started to watch videos of you from your home world. Watching your every lively moment. You weren't quiet to others. Miguel just wanted more of you.

"Ohoho, I think I found something interesting for our little Spider creep."

"Stop calling me that, Lyla." Miguel hissed towards his AI, "What did you find?"

Lyla withheld a snicker as she pulled a video up.

"Sooooo, (Y/N), when are you joining the dating pool?" One of your friends from your world asked.

"Ah-I'm not sure," You said with a light laugh, "There is this one guy I work with...He's kind of my boss, but he is so amazing. You're going to laugh, but I clamp up and can't say a word to him!"

"Liar. You never shut up!"

"My heart just keeps racing whenever I see him! He's so handsome and perfect. I just don't think I'm good enough for someone like him."

"What's his name and how long have you liked him?"

"Miguel and call it cheesy, but it was totally love at first sight. I can't even begin to describe my dreams~"

Miguel felt flustered as he immediately turned the video off. So that was why you kept avoiding him. Unable to hide his smile, Miguel knew that it was going to be much more fun from now on. Hopefully his teasing will get you to open up more.

---------

With a heavy sigh, you scurried your way inside the Spider Society. It had been a long day of both work and crime fighting. Alchemax had you up to your head with paper work, then of course your Rhino decided to cause some havoc in the city.

You were due to a nice shower.

Hearing the alarm go off, you let out another sigh as you accepted the anomaly request on your watch. You entered the different world and nearly gasped as Miguel swung over you. Your face turning bright red as you got a good look at his ass.

Unsure if you should stay or not, you panicked. What if you messed up in front of Miguel?

Deciding to stay, you hurried to Miguel's side. This time the anomaly was a Doc Ock. You scrunched your face up as this Doc Ock used mud like attacks.

"Watch out, (Y/N)!" Miguel called out.

You felt your spider senses tingle as you went to dodge an attack. Before you could move, you felt yourself being pulled. Gasping sharply, you landed in Miguel's arms as you pulled you to safety. His grip tight around your waist.

"You take him from behind, I'll go front." Miguel said.

"A-"

You squeaked in response, unable to say anything. Instead, you followed his lead, trying to forget about his arm around you.

You knew you were going to sleep good tonight.

---------

Miguel had his eyes on you during the whole fight. He wanted to touch you more. Using the fight as an excuse, Miguel kept grabbing your arm, pulling against your waist and even bumping into you. Any kind of touch was what he needed.

Once the Doc Ock was captured, Miguel had you follow him back to the Spider Society. By this time nearly everyone was getting ready to go home.

"Ugh, I need a shower," You whispered, "Um....M-Miguel...G-Give me like....twenty....twenty minutes....p-please?"

God. You sounded so sweet. Miguel knew he was handsome, but to make such a outgoing person like you stutter and freeze was new. Hell, it started to turn him on.

"Sure,"

At this rate, Miguel needed to be the one to make the first move. These little touches here and there weren't going to get you out of your shell. Having an idea of where you were going, Miguel just chuckled as he decided to have some fun.

---------

A shower was definitely what you needed. Washing off the sweat, stress and mud from the way was so refreshing. Letting the water run down your body, you started to recall how Miguel kept touching you during the fight.

This was the most he had ever made contact with you. It was so hot and addicting. Knowing that the place was empty, you decided to give in to your small urges.

Letting your hands roam, you leaned against the shower wall and started to think of Miguel. The way his hands felt against your body. If only they could touch you elsewhere. His deep, charming voice whispering dirty things in your ear.

"Mhm~"

Imagining Miguel finally kissing you. His fingers making a mess of your sex while you cry and beg. How wonderful would that be?

"Sounds like someone needed to destress."

You gasped, recognizing the voice to be Miguel's. Your face was probably a million shades of red as you bend down and tried to hide inside the shower. Though, there really wasn't any use since he knew you were in here now.

"(Y/N)?" Miguel hummed lowly, "It's okay to show your face."

"B-But..." You covered your face, feeling embarrassed, "Sorry,"

"For what?"

Hearing the curtain open, you squeaked and looked up at Miguel. His lower half in a loose towel as he looked down at you with what seemed like a seductive grin.

"How cute. All wrapped up?" Miguel chuckled lowly.

This was the most you've ever had a conversation with him. Registering that you were naked, you tried to close the curtain again, but Miguel stopped you. He bend down to your level, his towel falling off, causing you to look away.

"Don't be shy, (Y/N), you can look."

Your mind was racing a mile a minute. Unable to refuse such a offer, you slowly turned your head to face Miguel. Your whole body had probably turned red from embarrassment as you tried to hide. How could Miguel say something to tempting?

"You're cute," Miguel chuckled as he grabbed your chin, making you look at him, "I like you, (Y/N). I like you a lot."

"Huh?"

Your eyes widen to Miguel's confession. Trying to stutter the words out, you decided to take the leap. Leaning forward, you pecked Miguel's lips to respond to him.

That was a great mistake.

Miguel pinned you against the wall, his lips all over yours. Your body resting against his hips as his hands roamed your body. You weren't sure where to touch him, so you kept your hands around his neck. His tongue ravishing your mouth in the meantime.

Your body arched slightly as you felt his dick poking against your entrance. You wanted to say that this was moving too fast, but at the same time....You wanted him to fuck you.

Stroking your hands against his chest, you felt Miguel groan. He broke the kiss, watching you pant for air.

"Don't stop touching me, (Y/N). I want to see the side of you that everyone else sees."

"Mhm," You still felt shy towards his words, "T-This....This is the side I...I will only show you..."

"Even better," Miguel said with a grin as he captured your lips again.

You whimpered into the kiss, enjoying every second of it. His hands reaching your breasts, giving them a squeeze while he moved his hips to rub his dick against your cunt. You were feeling hot and wet, ready for this to escalate.

"Thank god the showers are still open. MJ and I had a fight so I'm sleeping here tonight." One of the Peters said as they entered the shower room.

Miguel was quick to shut the curtain, covering your mouth with his, wanting to keep you quiet.

"I wish I got into a fight. I got kicked out of my apartment because I couldn't' pay rent in time. I gotta crash here until I get a new place."

Wrapping your arms around Miguel's neck, you gently tugged against his hair to have him stop. Miguel pulled away, smirking down at you. He leaned towards you, nibbling against your ear,

"You really shouldn't have done that," He whispered, "We'll going to continue this in my office."

You rolled your lips inward as you just nodded. Miguel still held onto you, wanting to make sure you knew how hard he was. Covering your face against his chest, you tried your best to hide your smile.

This was the best day ever.

And the fun hadn't even started yet.

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Hope you enjoyed!!

[nalyra-dreaming]

As a book reader, does the show still manage to surprise you? I understand that it's an adaptation but the entire cast,writers and producers keep saying that it's faithful to the books, so I'm wondering if anyone who has read all the books can be surprised or amazed by these stories.

Of course the show is amazing but it's like me watching Harry Potter and already knowing Sirius Black is not trying to really kill Harry..sorry for the spoiler.

(All good, I did watch and have read HP ... back then.)

Oh absolutely.

The show is its own thing - and then again not, because the books permeate it. The language, the characters, the world.

FOR ME - it's the experience of it coming to life. Oh, I know what will happen in emotional big story points - but the rest? I LOVE the little changes, the hints, the insinuations. The way it is remixed.

Actually that's half the fun for me, to see what they remix and how, and to speculate how the puzzle will come together.

And the meta level? Astonishing. The color-conscious implementation? Brilliant. The foreshadowing and callbacks and parallels - ingenious. The casting and acting - superb.

It's not an easy show either, and I adore that. Not kidding.

I had not hoped for this to become a show like that.

Show of the decade, imho.

So yes, it does manage to surprise me - but not to ... surprise me, if that makes sense. I don't see it all coming - but when it does? It suddenly makes so much sense! Just brilliant^^

[hanafubukki]

I'm back with another Lilia thought! This one isn't mafia au though, so you can wait with reading it so it won't spoil the immersion lol ( I'm so glad you liked it btw 😭)

This one is about you being Lilia's fae s/o. When he went to NRC with the boys he gave you a cell phone to stay in touch with him with. You use it to play games together and communicate (I think it'd be mostly texting as to simulate writing letters to your loved one who's away), but something he'll never tell anybody about are the more private messages you share. Because he's an old man, sensing lustful messages with Lilia is like writing prose. Taking turns to write and seeing the messages show up in real time...there's just something about this old man and language when it comes to intimate times. He'll save the conversations to re-read whenever he's needy. There's not much video/photo sharing (again, to fit with the whole writing letters thing), but it'd be fun I think if you discover the Twisted Wonderland version of Only Fans and jokingly tell Lilia that you wanna make an account and have him as your only subscriber. He actually loves the idea, of you being needy and the way he finds out is a ping notification that you've uploaded a new photo of yourself- for his eyes only. You'd want the account to be private since it's for personal use but I can see Lilia maybe being adventurous and being into teasing other men knowing they'll never have you. They can see a few clothed pictures but the number of people who can see it all never goes above 1.

-Fake Date Sebek Anon

[Talking about this fic]

Hello Fake Date Sebek Anonie 🌺🌷💞

That Lilia Mafia ask really just hit me suddenly and released all the core memories I had and I couldn’t not make it into a flower shop combination. Thank you Anonie, that AU lives in my brain rent free 💞💞

God can you imagine?? The text messages switches between Victorian flirting to modern flirting and sometimes the combination. Texting each other how much you missed the other so.

Telling him, how you miss his warmth and his touch. How your own imagination and hands can do so much. Even magical toys do not help. Gradually it shifts to this account you see humans use.

How innovative and advanced. Of course you bring it up to Lilia and he’s down. As long as it’s only him that can see it. He loves knowing no one can have you. You’re his.

He loves to show off your more casual pictures but he’s full of pride. No one else can see you, feel you, or touch you. No one else would know your taste.

Hm? What’s this? It’s as if you heard him. You sent him a new picture. He’s happy that fae’s have an abundance of magic. Silver, Sebek, and Malleus can look after each other for a few hours.

He’s going to teleport to you right now. The urge to feel and taste you too great. His hands itches to shred the clothes you have on and Lilia is not one to deny himself of his favorite treat. 💞🌺

[kikis-writing-world]

Espresso

Or: She needed to come back down to earth

Chrissy Cunningham has tickets to see her favorite pop star perform. It's a concert she'll never, ever forget.

Past Eddie/Chrissy, current female Pop Star!Reader/Rockstar!Eddie

*In the 3rd person, can also be read as an OC

Word Count: 3k

Rating/Warnings: Reader is female presenting and performed Espresso originally by Sabrina Carpenter, and I describe her as moving and posing, but possibly with the aid of dansers? - blank slate otherwise. No Upside Down. Could be read either canon!AU (mid 90s or so as they're adults now) or modern!AU. If I missed anything AU wise or blankslate!reader wise, please let me know kindly <3 I'm only human.

This work is rated PG but this blog is always 18+

A/N: The song got me, what can I say? Somewhere in my head Espresso mixed with Sk8er Boy by Avril Lavigne and here's what you get. A little fic to whet your appetite. Not edited, not betaed, written in about 1.5 hours while also at work- but I hope you enjoy it anyway <3

divider by @saradika-graphics

“Say you can't sleep, baby, I know That's that me, espresso-

Chrissy giggled as she sang along to the track floating from the state of the art boombox on her dresser. Her best friends, Cindy and Linda, danced around the bedroom with her, feeling like teens again as they got ready for the concert that evening.

“I can’t get enough of this song,” Linda gushed as she leaned close to the mirror above Chrissy’s vanity. She stopped singing along with the other girls long enough to apply her shiny lip gloss to perfection.

“She’s the best.” Chrissy agreed, turning the volume up even farther, hitting the threshold as the boombox reached max volume.

“Can I borrow this?” Cindy asked, picking up one of Chrissy’s eyeshadow palettes.

“Of course,” Chrissy agreed without thought, only to pause. “Wait- as long as you use that pink,” Chrissy amended, pointing to the neon hue. “Because it’s perfect with your outfit.”

The girls all laughed as they agreed on it being the perfect shade.

“How did you even get these tickets, it’s been sold out for months?” Linda asked, turning away from the mirror, bopping in place to the music.

“Daddy has a client whose son’s fiance got mono on her bachelorette vacation, so they canceled the wedding. They sold her tickets to afford the cancellation fees.” Chrissy explained as she compared two necklaces against her outfit. The girls cringed in sympathy, but the mood was quickly uplifted as they all tuned back into the music, forgetting the unknown couple’s problems. The tornado of excitement and glitter moved through the room until suddenly the girls all stopped what they were doing to sing along in tandem.

“I'm working late 'cause I'm a singer Oh, he looks so cute wrapped around my finger

The three faced each other as they sang, sharing the moment as they each performed their hearts out as if they were the one performing on stage tonight. The three danced, twirling their hips and waving their arms the way they did as teens, trying to get all the boys’ attention. Not the three grown adults they were, with homes, partners and responsibilities. It was freeing to feel so young again.

“My twisted humor, make him laugh so often My honey bee, come and get this pollen-

The three all shrieked with laughter as they reached the end of the verse, laughing at each other’s lewd dance moves in camaraderie.

“Oh shit, is that the time?!” Cindy gasped, cutting off the raucous laughter. The other two girls turned to the clock Cindy was staring at, noticing time did indeed fly when you were having this much fun. If they didn’t finish getting ready soon, they would be late and then have a hard time finding a good spot to watch the show from.

“Shit!” Chrissy cursed, barely audible over the blasting music. She jogged over to the boombox, turning it down a few notches to a more reasonable volume.

All three women snapped back to task, perfecting their make-up and concert looks. It wasn’t long before they were running out the door and into Chrissy’s powder blue Beamer. Chrissy hadn’t even backed out of the driveway before Linda had the car stereo blasting the album, right where they had left off in the house. The three women sped down the highway, singing along to the tracks they would soon be hearing live.

Chrissy was sure her perfectly coiffed hair was falling and frizzing up, her carefully applied make-up turned into colourful smudges across her cheeks, the boots styled to match her outfit splattered with dirt and mud - but she couldn’t care less. She was having the time of her life at the concert. The singing was amazing, even better than the album. The dancing, the choreography - the hunky dancers. She was having the best time, dancing and singing along with Cindy and Linda.

“This is AMAZING!” Linda shrieked as the song ended. Chrissy clapped and cheered while Cindy jumped up and down.

“Alright, alright,” the woman on stage spoke, waving off everyone still cheering after the last number she performed. Her chest heaved as she caught her breath from the singing and dancing, skin glistening with sweat under the stage lights. Her hair hadn’t fallen and her make-up hadn’t budged. Chrissy watched her in awe, quieting her own thrilled cheers to hear what her favorite artist had to say next.

“Oh my god, Indiana, you guys are crazy!” She laughed, waiting for the crowd to die down. Unfortunately, the comment made them cheer in agreement. Chrissy and her friends jumped up and down, cheering along.

The performer on stage dropped the microphone to her side as she laughed again at the crowd’s reaction. She looked off stage and made a little shrugging motion, a smile on her face all the while. Chrissy couldn’t see who she was looking at from her angle - someone on her team, her manager, someone running the equipment; she wasn’t sure. She kept looking between the crowd and the wing of the stage until they quieted enough for her to speak once more.

“See I have a friend,” the singer started, roaming the stage with ease. Her presence filled the large space as the crowd - Chrissy, Linda and Cindy included - took in each word with bated breath. A field full of fans waiting to see what she would say or do next. “A very good friend, you might say.” The singer admitted with a sly smirk.

The crowd exploded - some cheers, some boos of disappointed fans.

“Did you know she was seeing anybody?!” Linda gasped.

“I hadn’t seen anything in The Enquirer!” Cindy shook her head, flailing her hands as if trying to fan herself. “Oh my god, who do you think it is?”

“It could be anyone,” Linda started, only to be interrupted by Chrissy.

“Maybe Leo!” She laughed, joking while all the while loving the idea that her favorite pop star might be dating her favorite hunk of an actor. Linda and Cindy agreed by way of shrieking and jumping with excitement. Chrissy joined in immediately.

“See, my very special friend is from right here in Indiana!” the star continued over the mic, halting the girls’ theorizing. They quieted down, Linda blindly grabbing for Chrissy and Cindy’s hands as she never took her eyes off the stage. No one wanted to miss a hint on who the mystery “friend” was. “He told me that you guys… Well, he doesn’t seem to like his home state very much.” The star fake pouted as the rapt audience booed. She looked off stage, pointing her exaggerated pout that way. 

“Oh my god, is he here? Who is it?” Cindy nearly fell over, trying to lean over far enough to see backstage.

“I can’t see from here!” Chrissy huffed, craning her neck to get a better look. It was no use, they were too far to the same side to see into the wings.

“I know! What a meanie!” The singer laughed joyfully into the microphone. “I tell him he’s a big meanie all the time, but he doesn’t believe me.” She rolled her eyes playfully.

A dull laugh rolled through the crowd and the performer gave it a moment to breathe before continuing with her story. “I think you were all a bit mean to him too once, but maybe one day you’ll forgive each other.” She tutted. The crowd cheered their agreement - anything to make their idol happy. The reaction made the singer beam brightly, glancing over her shoulder yet again.

“This next song… I wrote it for him, and-”

The crowd cheered and awed, interrupting her briefly. She shot a wink offstage before rolling through the crowd’s roar.

“I wrote this for him, and right here in front of everyone he says he hates, I’m dedicating it to him! Let’s show him some love!” She yelled over the mic, the crowd growing louder as it fed off her excitement.

There was a short beat of silence before the opening notes to Espresso started, making the crowd go wild once more as the smash hit song started.

Chrissy, Cindy and Linda all screamed along with the crowd, jumping with excitement despite their sore, aching feet after dancing all night. Chrissy pulled her camera out of her fanny pack, snapping pics as the song started. The singer smiled and danced to the opening notes, waiting for her cue to start singing. The dancers around her grooved along with her, waiting for the choreography to start.

"Now he's thinkin' 'bout me every night, oh Is it that sweet? I guess so Say you can't sleep, baby, I know That's that me, espresso-

The trio of women sang along at the top of their lungs, as loud as their already sore throats would allow. Chrissy couldn’t be bothered to care that she likely wouldn’t have a voice tomorrow, it was worth it to sing along.

"Too bad your ex don't do it for ya Walked in and dream came trued it for ya Soft skin and I perfumed it for ya I know I Mountain Dew it for ya That morning coffee, brewed it for ya One touch and I brand newed it for ya

The singer and her group of dancers made their way towards their side of the stage, the crowd around them cheering for her as she approached. The three girls got their cameras ready as they snapped pictures of their favorite singer performing their favorite song just a dozen feet away from them. The male dancers fawned over her as the female dancers backed her up, dancing with her.

"Now he's thinkin' 'bout me every night, oh Is it that sweet? I guess so Say you can't sleep, baby, I know That's that me, espresso Move it up, down, left, right, oh Switch it up like Nintendo Say you can't sleep, baby, I know That's that me, espresso

The singer moved back across the stage, doing her best to perform to all sides, giving each fan in the crowd a chance to see her and her dancers. She had been doing it the whole show, but the crowd predictably was even more lively for her big, hit single.

All too soon, the song ended with everyone on stage hitting a final pose. The singer was center stage, looking upwards towards the stage lights as the dancers posed around her. Cameras flashed through the people as everyone took their chance to get a decent shot as everyone stood still aside from their heaving chests as they caught their breath.

Chrissy, Linda and Cindy followed suit, cheering and taking pictures between their jumping and flailing. Chrissy was lifting her camera for her fourth or fifth photo of the pose - she lost count - when Linda grabbed her arm and her attention.

“Look!!!” Linda screamed as others in the crowd started reacting too. A tall, lanky figure had emerged from the wing, sauntering proudly towards the singer at center stage. He wore dark coloured jeans and a black t-shirt. His face wasn’t visible past the mop of inky curls when they first caught sight of him, but Chrissy felt a sinking feeling in her stomach at the silhouette. It was too familiar, a memory of her past, but surely it wasn’t-

More people from the crowd started screaming as the man crossed the stage. The singer finally dropped the pose, lowering her eyes to look at the crowd. She was smiling, face flushed from performing, but she soon noticed the crowd looking to the side.

Chrissy heard a man behind her, arguing with his girlfriend, the conversation fading in and out of the ruckus around her. “... -ed Coffin… telling you that’s him… think I know what “Shredder” Ed-…”

The pop star on stage looked surprised to see the man at first, but by the time he pushed through the cluster of back-up dancers around her, she was smiling up at him. The smile was brighter than any she’d given the audience on stage that night, a smile that shone in her eyes in a totally different way than performing on stage made them shine. The pop star started to speak, the microphone still held to her side not picking up any of the words. She didn’t say much before the man interrupted her, cupping the back of her head and dipping down to kiss her.

The crowd cheered through the passionate kiss. The back-up dancers around her reacted with joy and surprise at the public display of affection, some gasping while others applauded or laughed. 

The man pulled the woman to him, holding her like he might be able to absorb her into himself in front of everyone. The singer didn’t fight, but she was obviously caught off guard at first. It barely took a moment for her to drop the microphone, a loud thunking noise booming from the speakers as it clattered to the stage. Her arms wrapped around the man, returning his embrace as she kissed him back. The sound of camera shutters nearly drowned out the voices of the crowd as everyone rushed to take pictures of the pop star and her apparent boyfriend - some to brag to their friends, some to try to sell as the first appearance of the world’s newest celebrity couple.

Chrissy stayed frozen, camera to her side as she watched who she was sure was her high school ex-boyfriend, Eddie Munson, having a heavy makeout session on stage with her favorite pop star.

“Wait, is that…” Cindy asked, starting to also recognize the man who had yet to turn his face their way. Cindy looked at Chrissy, her frozen reaction being all the answer she needed. Cindy prodded Linda, trying to get her to smarten up to what was happening to their friend.

The couple on stage finally parted, catching their breath as they only had eyes for each other. The pop star looked up at her man like he was the only person in the whole state, let alone in a crowd of hundreds. The man’s hand, covered with large silver rings, cupped her cheek gently. From where she stood, Chrissy could see his thumb caress her cheek. Despite the warm summer day, Chrissy shivered as she felt a ghost of a touch, a memory, across her own cheek.

The man leaned in, speaking directly into the singer’s ear for a few seconds. She let go a second later as he released her, bending down to pick up the microphone that was left abandoned on the stage. The man turned towards the crowd, finally showing his face to the entire audience. Some cheered as they recognized the lead singer and guitarist for the heavy metal band, while others who didn’t listen to heavy music waited for a clue to who the man was.

“Is that Eddie?!” Linda gaped, looking up at the man who was once the boy dating her friend.

He was older now than he was then, obviously. His mop of curls were still present, if possible better cared for. He had inky tattoos up and down his visible arms and some high on his neck, coming out of the collar of his Metallica shirt. He’d grown a short goatee, but the dimple in his cheek was still visible as he addressed the crowd. He looked… Great was probably not a strong enough word for how good Eddie Munson looked.

“Your Ex? Like, Eddie Mu-oof” Linda continued until Cindy elbowed her harshly in the side. Linda finally noticed the pale, frozen expression on Chrissy’s face. “Oh.” She mumbled lamely.

“Who's a freak now, Indiana?” Eddie growled into the microphone, his voice raspier than Chrissy remembered it- age, constant performing and steady smoking had settled into his vocal chords in an appealing way. It reminded Chrissy how he used to sound after a show at The Hideout, voice rough from a night of screaming into the mic. 

Eddie tossed the microphone to a nearby dancer, not bothering to check if the unsuspecting man caught it (he did, barely) as he stuck his tongue out, devil horns atop his head. Just like that, Chrissy could see the boy underneath the age, tattoos and facial hair. The 18 year old who couldn’t promise her the world, but promised everything in his world, only for her to break his heart a year and some months later. Out of everyone there, Chrissy looked up and saw no one but Hawkins’ freak with a heart of gold Eddie Munson, but she realized Shredder Eddie Munson of Corroded Coffin didn’t even know she was there. She hadn’t even realized he’d gotten signed, or the band was famous- when had that happened?

Eddie turned, planting another passionate, borderline messy kiss on the pop star's laughing lips. The crowd erupted in another set of cheers, harshly pulling Chrissy back to real life.

Eddie ended the kiss, resting his forehead against the singer’s. The two’s lips were moving through their wide smiles. Chrissy could only imagine the sweet nothings being exchanged. Once upon a time, in a different life, in a quiet trailer park, those sweet nothings had been reserved just for her.

Eddie patted the star on the ass before releasing her from his arms. She laughed as he jogged back to his spot in the wings, hand over her mouth like she couldn’t believe the kiss they’d just shared. Eddie didn’t bother to acknowledge the crowd as he left, no wave goodbye or lude gestures. Before he disappeared from view, he turned to blow a kiss in her direction.

Red faced but smiling gleefully, the starlet pretended to catch it, placing it on her cheek. She stared after him even once he was out of view, only remembering herself when the dancer handed her the microphone.

“Oh, um…” She stumbled her words into the mic, giggling bashfully. She lowered the mic and took a deep breath, physically shaking her limbs. “I was expecting that even less than the rest of you.” She joked once she brought the mic back up to her smudged lips. “Let’s, uh… Let’s move on with the show?” She laughed, unsure how else to move forward with the setlist. The crowd cheered their agreement as she nodded to all her dancers and musicians to get ready to start back up.

“Should we leave?” Cindy asked quietly. Linda stared at Chrissy, waiting for her response.

It was definitely a concert she’d never, ever forget.