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saintslewis · 4 months

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❝ 𝐂𝐇𝐔𝐑𝐂𝐇 𝐆𝐈𝐑𝐋 ❞

𝐑𝐄𝐍𝐀𝐈𝐒𝐒𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐄: 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐒 - 𝐋𝐇𝟒𝟒

pairing: sir lewis hamilton x fem!oc

summary: we’re still in america 🗣️ . let’s party with nadia, shall we?

warnings: outfit descriptions, cussing, social media environment, slight jealousy, typos, links to tag are down below and let me know if you want to be tagged in this series!

saint’s team radio 🎀: let’s not talk about how long overdue this chapter is, okay? 🫶🏽 hope you guys enjoy and i hope y’all missed Lewdia as much as i did!

pls like, comment and reblog!

fc: @/unclewaffles_ on ig!

pic cred: pinterest. dividers: @cafekitsune

With the jingle of the house keys, the pair laughed into the night as Nadia carried her heeled boots in her hand. Lewis held onto her as she was on his back, his kind self offering to carry her since they left the arena.

"Out of all the songs they could've used, why'd they choose old school Drake when we showed up on the jumbotron?" She chuckled, removing the last of her tears of laughter with her thumb. "Nah, I'm still on the baby who wouldn't let go of you during halftime. Your jewellery was like the most interesting toy ever." He smiled at the memory, someone randomly handing Nadia their baby and started taking pictures.

"I don't think I'll ever get used to that many cameras around me. The kids back at work are gonna have so much to say.” She admitted, watching the large front door open up and the entry hall greeted them. Nadia tapped his shoulder and he took that as sign to let her get on the ground. “Thank you for the piggy back ride, Sir.” She smiled and turned on her secret sock covered heel to enter the house.

He’ll never admit how much he loves when she calls him sir. Maybe one day he will, maybe he won’t.

Although sad that Roscoe wasn’t there to greet them due to him getting to be with his other dog friends, Nadia pushed that to the back of her mind and thought of her Gucci sandals for the comfort of her feet. “If we ever go anywhere where you know i’ll be cheering, please remind me to take my sandals with me.” She said out loud, slowly heading upstairs when an idea popped into her head.

The night was barely over and ending it so awkwardly didn’t sit well with Nadia.

“I have a feeling that you’re plotting something.” He stated, standing still waiting to hear what she could possibly come up with.

“Would you be up for ice cream right now?” She smiled while turning around to face him from the bottom stairs.

“At this time? Wouldn’t most shops be closed by now?” Lewis asked, confused by the idea but he knew he didn’t want to decline it.

“We could take a drive to find out,” The smile on her face was mischievous. “The night is way too young for us to come back from a game and sit in the house in silence.” She continued.

After a beat of silence, he had made his decision. “Let’s go change and you’re driving.” Lewis gave in. He felt it was right to let Nadia lead such activities, getting her used to such a busy lifestyle.

She walked out of the guest room with a basic athle-leisure romper and the same simple gold jewellery from earlier and her uggs were hugging her feet. “Hey Lew? Do you have a hoodie I could borrow?” She called out as she reached his room door that wasn’t closed all the way. Although not answering her, he walked out with a hoodie that smelled exactly like him, seemingly from Dior. Only written “CD” on the top left of the hoodie and just like she preferred all her hoodies, it was oversized.

“Dior? Are you crazy? I could stain this.”

“We have a laundry room downstairs, Nads. I could always buy another one and the whole store for you.” He slightly smirked.

“If that’s not the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me.” She jokingly put her hand on her chest and they burst into laughter a few seconds after.

Sitting in the almost empty ice cream shop, Sweet Oasis, the two were on their second sugarcone bowl of their respective ice cream flavours. Nadia with cookies and cream and Lewis with vegan vanilla. The first round of desserts were deemed free by the all too excited cashier who was a big fan of Lewis.

“So in hindsight, Mission 44 is to help uplift the youth into STEM spaces including f1. Man, that’s so cool and to hear it growing so fast makes me feel proud.” Nadia nodded as she played around with her ice cream.

“Thank you, I really want to expand even further in different countries such as Brazil and surprise surprise, South Africa.” He chuckled at her face once mentioning her country of origin. “You’re already in my good books, Sir. Once you meet my friends and Rea then maybe you’ll be in the top five.” Nadia smiled, biting down on the wooden spoon.

“What are your friends like? Feel like I have to prep myself to meet them.” Lewis joked by moving his shoulders around. “They’re really cool and incredibly funny. They tried their best to make me famous but looks like I did that all by myself.” She teased.

Taking another bite of the ice cream, she spoke again. “The boys will try and intimidate you, especially Chunks and Filly. The girls will be welcoming, just always bring chocolate with you.” Nadia informed him, smiling at the thought of her friends.

“Then Rea is like my child although she’s my cousin. She’s gonna stay with my mom while she finishes year 12 but I think I might just take her in, I miss her too much.” She said, not wanting to let him know all about the tension with her mom just yet.

Looking at the McLaren that Nadia drove to the ice cream shop, Lewis could tell that she wanted to switch topics because of the tone in her voice and her completely avoiding eye contact with him.

“Do you want to talk about something else?” He asked and all she did was nod. She mouthed a thank you to him afterwards, feeling herself become safe with him. “So we’ve got quite the week ahead of us. Rhode, Hailey Bieber’s skin company, is hosting a party and we were invited.” He spoke.

“You wanna give me a heart attack or something, dude? I’m gon’ be around the Biebers? I still haven’t recovered from Beyoncé!” She replied, whispering the last words to him so that the few people around them wouldn’t be able to hear them.

He grinned at her reaction, her dramatic excitement along with her smile that she would always try hide would always make him feel something in his heart. He didn’t want to think that far. Lewis wouldn’t allow himself to think that far.

“Then the big news that Tia shouted at me to tell you is that we’re going to a Versace event in Cannes on Tuesday I think. Then it’s the Monaco gp which is a spectacle on its own.” He informed then chuckled at her putting her head in her hands.

“Your surprises are going to send me to the hospital one day, what do you mean Versace? That’s like a lifelong dream for me, dude.” She expressed, not sure whether to feel excited about experiencing all of these things or terrified for the busy schedule.

Finishing the last of his ice cream, he pushed the cup to the side and held out both his hands towards Nadia. Taking the sign to put her hands in his, he held them tightly. “Are we bout to pray right now? It’s a little too late for that, the ice cream’s done.” Nadia joked, looking i between their hands and his face.

“Nads.” Lewis started. “Sorry, serious stuff now.” The man couldn’t resist the smile on his face as she joked around, revealing more of her personality to him.

“My life gets incredibly busy, even I get exhausted. So, you don’t have to be everywhere with me. It would be cool to see how you do things while we’re at all these events but you need your time to yourself, y’know?” He continued.

Nodding her head, she spoke up. “Yeah no, I get you. It’ll take some time to get used to everything and I don’t mind the travelling, you’re cool to be…around. Pookie, we gotta go.” Nadia’s eyes were concentrated on whatever was going on behind Lewis.

“Don’t look back, they’ll know we’re watching them. Let’s just get up and go to the car.” Nadia said, still holding his hands and she put on a smile that didn’t reach her eyes.

And as she said, the pair stood up and threw away their trash, saying goodbye to the worker whilst ignoring the flashes from the large window shops. She lifted her hood before walking out the door that Lewis opened for her and the flashes tripled. Looking at her husband, he already had his sunglasses on and dug in his pocket to give her the car keys.

Once in the McLaren, the car front was surrounded by the paparazzi but the tinted windshield gave them a little bit of privacy. In the driver’s seat, Nadia took out her phone and connected her phone to the car after igniting the engine. “Have you heard of Amapiano?” She asked him, watching him get comfortable being the passenger.

“Uh, kinda. Why?”

“Wanna take a lil drive and listen to it?” And there was her mischievous smile once again. Before he could get his answer out, different beats started playing until the beat started to flow and the artist started singing in a different language that Nadia clearly knew very well.

Rolling down the windows a bit, she reversed the supercar and drove off, leaving the paparazzi speechless.

nadiahamilton

liked by lilymhe, nataliatheedon and 484,828 others

nadiahamilton rhode ready <3

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loriharvey i’m actually obsessed with you, i can’t wait to meet you

nadiahamilton i’m too excited

lewishamilton you’re so welcome for me curling the back of your head

nadiahamilton sleep with one eye open, pookie 🫶🏽

user blasting amapiano at night while driving to you is cool?

nadiahamilton it’s one of the best things i’ve ever done

user it’s just unnecessary publicity

nadiahamilton you wanted to be in the car with me, didn’t you?

justineskye your face card is insane, i’m hyperventilating

nadiahamilton that’s all you 🥹

user mother

user it’s still weird that you guys are here praising a woman who spawned out of nowhere

user like why is no one talking about this???

user it’s very simple. they’re married and she’s only showing herself to the public now

haileybieber i want to be your mirror, just stare at you forever

lewishamilton that’s what i’m there for!

beyonce 💗

user WAIT WAITTTT HOW TF

user THERE’S NO WAY BEYONCÉ COMMENTED

user NADIA YOU BETTER SPILL

nataliatheedon 5,6,7 what?!

amarawinston ATEEEE

charlotteparks my friend is so super stunning

nadiahamilton awww you guysss 🤭

user idk what he sees in her, she barely is dressed

yungfilly come back to the UK nads, it isn’t the same ☹️

nadiahamilton i willllll, i’m just doing stuff with my husband 😝

chunkz tell him to come back as well 🫵🏽

lewishamilton 👋🏾

chunkz ay big ups brotha, the champion 🙏🏽

nadiahamilton chunkz pls 😭😭😭

user does anyone know if she’s got a studio for styling??

user i actually don’t know if she does

centralcee not yet, she works through emails and shit

user and how tf would YOU know

ajshabeel alr, pack it up cench 😐

user WHAT’S THE BEEF? THE GIRLS ARE FIGHTING

user please come back home to south africa 🇿🇦

nadiahamilton ofc i will 🥹

versace 🪩💗

“How do you do that? So easily too?” Lewis questioned as he read through her instagram comments. The way she casually spoke to everyone as if they were long time friends was absolutely fascinating to watch.

“It’s a technique I learned from my kids. I always want them to be comfortable in class especially when it’s a tough topic like post-Renaissance.” She shrugged her shoulders like it was nothing and continued to fluff her hair a bit more.

The two, coincidentally, were matching in colours. Nadia’s corset wasn’t too tight but it complimented her jewellery and she felt comfortable wearing such short shorts because the high top Rick Owen sneakers were just the right fit. Her Dior saddle bag sat next to her as they rode in the back of the Escalade.

And of course, they were both wearing their grillz.

“Thank you for introducing me to Amapiano fully. I can’t get any of the songs out of my head.” He said, constantly bouncing his hands on his legs to whatever beat he was thinking of. “It’s addictive! I told you, sthandwa.” She smiled softly but didn’t see him whip his head towards her.

“…What?”

“Oh! It’s a term of endearment from South Africa, it means ‘love’ then sthandwa sami is like my love. Just like how you brits say love.” Nadia explained. Lewis definitely heard everything she said but he was hooked on how she said it. If he thought that hearing songs with her native language was addictive, he could most definitely get used to hearing her speak it.

“Just to clarify, it’s Zulu. Whereas in Sotho, it’s something completely different. Don’t worry, I’ll teach you so that you don’t fuck up when we go to sa.” She chuckled but then stopped in her tracks.

“That’s if we do ever visit, don’t want to be too forward.”

“Of course we’re going to South Africa, are you kidding? I feel like I’ve just discovered a whole new world.” Lewis assured, basically jumping in excitement.

“What have I created?” Nadia joked to herself.

Although she knew that this was Hailey’s event and she knew that it was going to be full, Nadia didn’t expect it to be this full.

Leaning into Lewis as they walked through the crowd of paparazzi and hired photographers, she turned to him a little more. “I feel severely underdressed with my sneakers.” She worried. “You look amazing though, your feet are still not fully healed from yesterday right?” Lewis asked as discreet as possible.

“I mean I knew damn that I wasn’t going to wear heels because of yesterday.” She replied, waving to the photographer calling her and Lewis’ name. All of this was very weird. It felt weird to just be called by paparazzi.

“Exactly, so you’re cool. As long as you feel comfortable and you feel good, then I’m good.” He reassured her.

Before she could answer, they had reached the door and there was a girl standing with cocktails on the tray she was holding. They thanked her but politely declined to it and entered and the atmosphere inside was lively.

The colour scheme for Rhode was beige and other earthy colours which fit the aesthetic perfectly of the decor of the event. Sow r&b music was playing quite loudly while everyone in attendance was talking amongst themselves. As soon as her and Lewis stepped foot inside, many people’s attention went to him and Nadia.

Squeezing his hand a bit tighter, Nadia and Lewis made eye contact and he slightly relaxed because she looked calm but obviously a little nervous.

“Oh my God! The Hamiltons are here!” Someone shouted in a singsong voice and as Nadia was trying to identify who was that, Hailey Bieber and Lori Harvey appeared right in front of them with the the biggest smile on their faces. “Oh my goodness, welcome to Rhode! I’m so excited to see you guys and,” Hailey gasped as she took a look at Nadia.

“Nadia! You’re so beautiful, whoa. Where are my manners? I’m Hailey!” “And I’m Lori and girl, I was serious when I said i’m obsessed with you.” They introduced themselves and their smiles were damn near blinding. “It’s nice to meet you guys, this is exciting.” She smiled, grateful that they couldn’t see how nervous she was.

“Okay okay so let’s go take pictures now then I’ll introduce the products then we party!” Hailey said all too enthusiastically. In all of this, Lewis watched as Nadia interact so gracefully with the same people she was nervous to meet and he couldn’t help but feel proud of her and how she handled everything.

After taking photos with everyone and meeting Justine who damn near fainted at seeing Nadia in front of her, they were seated on their own little table just like everyone and were served hors d’oeuvres during the presentation of the skincare brand.

“How are you feeling?” Lewis leaned in and whispered as one of the products were being shown.

“I’m good, feeling much better. Wasn’t expecting so much love from the girls today.” She leaned over to him as well, careful to not make a noise for other guests.

“I knew they’d love you. And maybe you work with them in the future?” He mentioned, noticing her head resting on his shoulder so he moved a little closer where she could be more comfortable.

“When I get my own studio or truly advertise myself to such a crowd.” She replied. He nodded and she felt it, making her smile a little. “I have the strongest of feelings that there’s an after party when this is all done.” Nadia said, slightly lifting her head to look around the crowd that looked it was ready to party.

“Yup, it’s at their house. It’s like 5 minutes away from home so whenever you want to leave, we can.” And there go the butterflies in her stomach.

Walking into the Bieber’s home and seeing how it came alive, Nadia felt like she was in a movie. People who she always thought she would be lucky to see in person were introducing themselves to her and greeted her husband with the most excitement she’s ever seen.

After ‘settling in’ and finding a designated sitting spot to come back to from the dance floor, Nadia could be seen having the time of her life singing lyrics to the group of girls she met earlier including Jordyn Woods. The music shifted from hiphop to Afrobeats and the energy in the whole room was ignited.

Random people that she didn’t know started partying with her and hyped her up after each song. Once Amapiano started rolling in, all eyes were on her as she was dancing but didn’t want to use all her energy. With only a shot in her system, she started feeling rather thirsty and knew that it was time to go sit with her.

As she walked towards their table, she watched as Lewis danced in his seat at the song she was playing earlier in the day. “Now I have to take you to SA. Look at you shimmying.” She laughed as she flicked her hair back and sat next to him on the couch.

“Look at me? You were the party! Miles calls you Ms Party.” He laughed as Nadia saw where he pointed at and there was Miles and Amara but her eyes were closed. “Miles! Hey, damn it’s like i haven’t seen you in forever!” She greeted, opening the water bottle that Lewis saved for her. “And what’s up with Amara? Is she good?”

“I just got here with Amara and she ate two edibles on the way so she’s sleepy.” He smiled, not moving much as Amara was laying on him. “And Abel says hi.” Lewis said, tapping Nadia’s shoulder to catch his attention.

“Abel? As in Abel ‘The Weeknd’?” Nadia asked, gulping her water down as soon as she realised. All Lewis did was nod and just smile at her, their faces quite close already.

“Damn. Let me go find Justine, she got chocolate for me somewhere-” Nadia’s sentence was cut off short because she stood up and bumped into someone. She was still close to the table so she held onto the small table for balance.

Looking up, she saw a tall white man with a very obnoxious smile and recognised his face to be Jack Harlow. “Oh damn, I’m sorry, Ma. I really should watch where I’m going.” Jack apologised, reaching for her left hand and held it in her hand to hold in between his hands.

With her eyebrows furrowed and her eyes watching this man’s actions, she didn’t bother to answer him. “Don’t you feel the ring on my hand?” She fired at him with all lifted brow.

“You’ve got rings all over your hands and by the way, they’re quite soft, damn.” He straightened up his posture to feel on her hand even more. “What’s your name, Ma?” Jack asked with a dopey smile.

Feeling a hand circle her entire waist, she felt her body being pulled down and landed on something that didn’t feel like the couch. Looking down, Nadia was sat on Lewis’ lap. His lap and his hand was still on her waist quite securely.

“Go on, say your name love. He wants to know.” Lewis’ husky voice traveled through your ears and brought chills down your spine.

“Nadia Hamilton.” She managed to get out, shimmying her hand out of Jack’s hold to formally shake his hand. The white man’s face dropped at the sight in front of him. He really tried to flirt with a legendary f1 driver’s wife.

All Jack could muster up the strength to do was nod. “I’ll catch y’all later, it was nice meeting you guys.” He pursed his lips together and walked away.

Turning her head towards Lewis’ face, she resisted the urge to smirk. Deciding to be a little messy, she made herself comfortable on his lap and moved a bit, feeling an even tighter squeeze on her waist.

“You’re gonna be jealous of a lil white boy?” She teased but his smirk could not be wiped off his face. “Never that, Mrs Hamilton.” He responded, knowing he succeeded because she looked away as she was blushing.

“I’m so happy I was awake to see that.” Amara whispered to Miles as they watched their friends catch feelings for each other in real time.

nadiahamilton

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nadiahamilton miss party

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user i’ve never suffered from fomo like this before

user i wish i was an influencer rn

kehlani what can one do to party with you

nadiahamilton come to next week’s race 🫵🏽

kehlani already got the tickets 😝

fencer MISS PARTY 🗣️🗣️

nadiahamilton is this nickname going to stick?

spinzbeatinc you know it!

haileybieber you’re so much fun ily

nadiahamilton ily!!

loriharvey is this a sign to take a girl’s trip to sa?

justineskye i hope so!

ryandestiny can i come? it looked so fun

jordynwoods i’ve already got my bags PACKED

theestallion count me in, i’ll get to know you on the plane ride baby 😝

lewishamilton sthandwa sami 🕺🏽💗

nadiahamilton 😚🫶🏽

user HOW DOES HE KNOW ZULU???

user he’s got a Zulu wife bro

user this is so shocking to see 😭

user this better be a public holiday when they come over

niko now come back and party with us

nadiahamilton can you give me like a week?

ohnosharky this needs a celebration

nellarose_ Nadia’s homecoming if you will!

kingkennytv ‼️‼️‼️

student now you HAVE to spill the tea with us in class

nadiahamilton ugh fine 🙄

amarawinston 🪩🪩🪩🪩

user i was a server at the rhode event and omg you’re gorgeous in real life 😭

nadiahamilton thank you my angel 🤍

user i was a server too and since nobody’s saying it, you’ve got an ASS on you ma’am (i’m a girl)

nadiahamilton tears thank you 🤭

saint’s team radio 🎀 (once again): my fingers hurt from typing. Hope you enjoyed! Lewdia rises once again!

tags: new post

#saint writes #renaissance: the series #lewis hamilton x reader #lewis hamilton x black reader #lewis hamilton x oc #lewis hamilton fanfics #lewis hamilton imagine #lewis hamilton fanfic #lewis hamilton fic #f1 x black!reader #f1 x oc #f1 imagines #f1 x reader #f1 fanfic #f1 imagine #Spotify

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tieronecrush · 1 year

Text

water in your hands

joel miller x f!reader

rating: E (18+ ONLY, MDNI. you will be blocked if you don’t have age/range in your bio)

word count: 9.7k (she's long but hopefully good?)

summary:

You are sick, and you're married, and you might be dyin' But you're holdin' me like water in your hands…

Joel will only end up failing you. You deserve better than him. He needs you to move on, to give him peace of mind. So, he gets married to someone else, to try to force you away. Except he just can’t let you go, and you always come back when he calls. Like a dog with a bird at his door.

warnings: NO USE OF Y/N, cheating (it’s moon song y’all), marriage, age difference (joel is canon age, reader is 20s/30s), use of pet names, discussions of water/drowning, ANGST, hurt/comfort, unprotected sex, fingering, praising, lowkey possessive joel & reader, undefined relationship, alcohol use, mentions of john lennon cause he needs his own warning, joel is messy and selfish

author’s note: this is my first time writing any sort of fiction in literal years, but i couldn’t help but try to write this idea cause i'm a sad girl who wishes joel miller was real! apologies for any typos/errors, i am the actual worst at proofreading (see, my master's diss that i read at least 50 times and still had typos in the submission). any interaction is appreciated <3

PART II HERE

dividers from @saradika

Fresh snow had fallen this morning, wiping away some of the evidence of daily life here in Jackson. The air was biting, you work your sleeves over ungloved hands to keep the chill away, cheeks flushed. Snow crunches under your boots while you rush from your house to work at the Tipsy Bison, Jackson’s bar. Because of course one of the first things restored in the commune, in the middle of the apocalypse, was the one place with all the alcohol. Not that you were complaining, it gave you a job in town that you enjoyed; you got to pass time by being around people and making conversation, something you didn’t get in the small cottage that you occupied by yourself.

Keeping your eyes trained on the ground as you walk, careful to watch out for patches of ice, you only look up when you hear your name called. It’s the familiar voice of your boss; at least, you call him your boss cause he makes your shifts, but he hates to feel any sort of claim over the place since, y’know, the whole communist thing.

Tommy Miller stands near the steps up to the bar, clad in his signature look of denim and chambray, denim’s sister (the man wore a Canadian tuxedo nearly every day, you kept a tally). He’s waving you over, and before you can greet him, your attention is pulled from Tommy to the pair standing next to him.

A man, looking slightly older than Tommy but eerily similar with light grays sprinkled in his brown hair, donning a suede winter coat that was fitted across broad shoulders. His beard was patchy, not covering much of his strong jaw. Hooked nose, syrup brown eyes, olive skin looking pale from the season. There was a scar on his right temple, and other healed injuries dotting around the exposed skin. He’s handsome.

The young girl next to him just reached the man’s shoulders at her full height, bundled up in layers of sweatshirts and an open coat that didn’t look very warm. Her beanie framed her face along with her brown hair, the look on her face one of obvious teenage annoyance. She looked barely fifteen.

Tommy started introductions, barely getting a word out before the mystery man cut him off.

“I’m Joel, Tommy’s older brother. And this is Ellie.” He gestures to the girl and she gives you a nod. Joel removes a glove and extends his hand. You meet halfway, feeling the need to apologize for your cold skin chilling his own much warmer. Work-worn fingers wrap around to meet the skin on the backside of your hand. Your mind wanders to how those hands would feel in other places like --

Tommy’s voice breaks up your thoughts, “They’ve been traveling for a few months now to come here to Jackson.”

A smile crosses your face, grip not yet leaving Joel’s. His mouth ticks up slightly to one side.

“Welcome to Jackson, Mr. Miller, and you too, Ellie. It’s nice to put a face to the brother that Tommy’s been telling me stories about.”

“Please, just Joel. And it’s nice to meet you too, I hope he’s only told the good stuff.” Before you can respond, Ellie quips in.

“For months you have refused to tell people your name and now the first pretty girl in this perfect fucking town and you’ve given it twice.” She rolls her eyes so hard they disappear into her skull. Been there, Ellie. The attitude of a teenager is universal, even in the apocalypse.

Joel’s head snaps to Ellie and he grits out under his breath a little too loudly, “Ellie, quit cursing.”

Blush creeps across his face and you note that he didn’t say anything about Ellie knowing he thought you were pretty. Joel breaks eye contact and lets your hand go.

“Alright, hon, we should be on our way. I won’t subject you to any more of my older brother. He’s not much of a conversationalist,” Tommy teases. Joel gives Ellie a run for her money with the intensity of his eye roll.

Waving to the newcomers, you step back to head up the stairs. Out of the corner of your eye, you swear you see Joel take the smallest step towards you, about to follow like a puppy.

“See you later, boss. Nice to meet you again, Ellie and Joel, enjoy your tour of our perfect fucking town.”

Joel glances back over his shoulder to watch you walk into the swinging doors. Lord, if you could read his thoughts. He knew he was in trouble the moment he saw that damn smile.

The last few weeks have been torture to Joel. He and Ellie had been back in Jackson for about a month now, getting settled in their new normal. However, it wasn’t the lifestyle change that was anguishing him.

He’d thought of you a few times after he’d met you that winter; remembering your smile when Ellie was quietly resting against his back on the horse, a fever dream of you when he was in the basement of that abandoned house, a rush of nerves when Tommy brought him to the bar for the first time since he’d been back. He was infatuated with you, and now that he’s living in the same town as you, it’s gotten worse. Foolish mind daydreams of you and him together, feeling like a teenager again with the way you make his knees weak. He’s been careful not to spend much time alone with you, reminding himself that he shouldn’t let someone like you get involved with someone like him. All he’d do was fail you, fail to give you a good life. Words were carved into his skull at this point:

You’re too broken, too bruised, too scarred, and full of guilt - you’re going to fail her, too..

The small two-bedroom cottage diagonal to his and Ellie’s house was yours, and the proximity wasn’t helping his situation. And not only were you his neighbor, but you worked at the place where Joel spent a good chunk of his free time - the bar. He’d get drinks with Tommy or other guards after a shift, and that evolved to going by himself in hopes to see you and drown his guilt over those hopes (among a lot of other things).

It’s these nights when he’s become a bit looser with his self-inflicted rules around you. He occupies the stool at the end of the bar, stealing glances as you help other customers. His index finger rims the dry glass in front of him. You approach with that same damn smile aimed at him. It’s a dangerous combination along with the liquor, both fuzz his rationality.

“Another one, Mr. Miller?” you nod to his glass, reaching out to take it from him. Soft fingertips brush over his skin, sending a jolt of energy up his arm.

He clears his throat and answers, “Now, darlin’, I think I told you to call me Joel. Actually, at this point, I think it would be classified as begging. Mr. Miller makes me feel old.”

Throwing your head back with a laugh, the skin of your neck is exposed. His tongue involuntarily wets his lips when he thinks of leaving a mark there.

“Feel old? You are old, Miller,” he fakes offensive, eyebrows raised, “Aw, c’mon Joel, you know I’m just kiddin’. You’ve still got it. That silver fox thing you got goin’ on really does it for women ‘round here.”

He wants to be bold enough to ask if it’s doing anything for you, but instead, he huffs a laugh and shakes his head in disbelief, taking the two fingers of whiskey you poured.

“And how do you know that, darlin’? Haven’t had many offers for courtship since I got here.”

“I work in the bar. Women get drunk and spill their every thought. Including that the new guy with the daughter is hot,” you lean over the edge of the bar top, face less than a foot in front of him. Your eyes shift down to his lips. “Plus, I might encourage the conversation with my own thoughts.”

That smile again, except now it’s more of a smirk. He sips his drink, capturing the lingering alcohol with a lick of his lips. Your eyes go again, watching his tongue.

“I’m glad I can be such a riveting topic of conversation for you, sweetheart. Hope it’s good thoughts only.”

“Wouldn’t say the thoughts I have about you are good, Joel,” he swallows hard hearing the flirtation in your comment, feeling his jeans tighten.

Snapped out of hazy judgment, he resurfaces from the alcoholic tides; the rules he has about you act as a life preserver for him to cling to before getting caught in your rip current.

Joel throws back the rest of his drink, standing from the stool. He needs to get out of here if he wants to keep his promise to himself. Well, not that he wants to, but it’s what’s right. He can’t get you involved with his broken self. Your face drops slightly at the sight of him leaving, and part of him wants to lean over the bar to grab your face and kiss you hard in reassurance that he has the same kind of thoughts. But he can’t.

So he wishes you goodnight and walks home, angry with himself for nearly crossing the line. But he can’t help but think of your smile, and those flirty comments, as he tries to fall asleep.

You’re wide awake. Every time you close your eyes, your brain starts looping your conversation with Joel. Fingers rub circles in your temples, cursing to yourself as you get the replay of his extremely quick exit after you’d said you have…not so good thoughts about him.

The only indication you’d gotten from him that he felt any type of way toward you is his periodic visits to the bar on his own, spending the night chatting and laughing with you. You’d sometimes find yourself meeting his stare when you’d see each other across the street from your porches or in town.

But he’d never made a move, hell the most he’d touch you was to take a glass of whiskey or beer bottle from you. So why did you think he would suddenly reciprocate when you’d made openly flirty comments?

You needed some air. Just to clear your head of this embarrassing play-by-play. You pull yourself to stand and grab the sweatshirt at the end of your bed before heading out.

Jackson had the sort of late spring, early summer climate that happened to be your favorite. Warm, mildly humid days that brought the colors back after winter, and chillier nights, the right temperature to keep your cotton sleeping shorts on and add an extra layer up top to keep you warm.

Without thinking, you started towards the old barn on the edge of the residential area. The structure had seen better days, mostly used for storage now, but the open field behind it had an incredible view of the sky at night. It was a place you loved to go when that deep, dull ache in your chest wouldn’t quit.

Gravel crunches softly under your feet, small pebbles slip out from under your soles with each step. Not remotely focused on what’s in front of you, it comes as a surprise when hands land on your biceps. Your knee-jerk reaction is to scream, but as you look from the ground to the person grabbing you, the sound dies in your throat when you meet chestnut eyes.

“Jesus, Joel, you scared the shit out of me! Hasn’t anyone told you, you can’t just go grabbing women at night? Well, at any time of the day, really.” Your voice is rasped into a whisper despite the fact that there’s not a soul around.

“Maybe you should be paying a bit more attention to your surroundings when you’re walking by yourself at night, sweetheart” Joel counters, mouth ticking up to the side as his drawl continues, “Don’t know who’s lurking in the shadows in little ol’ Jackson.”

“You’re apparently the only person lurking, and you’re not doing a very good job since you just came right up to me.”

“Couldn’t help myself, I guess. What’re you doin’ out here at this hour?”

Heat burns under the surface of your skin when Joel drops his hands from your arms, the sensation radiating throughout the rest of your body. “Couldn’t sleep. I was gonna go sit out in the field behind the barn for a bit, admire the moon.”

He lights up with the first genuine smile you’ve seen from him. He has the best poker face out of anyone you know, but a part of you hopes that he feels like he doesn’t need it around you.

“Mind if I join ya, darlin’? Might be nice to stargaze a bit.”

You have to hold back from nodding frantically, attempting to play it off as if you’re weighing your options, “I don’t mind at all. You can teach me about the stars.”

The walk over is quiet but comfortable. At the shabby split-rail fence, you lift your foot to the lowest rail and push off the ground to mount the barrier. Joel’s hand meets the small of your back to hold you steady. Heat emanates from the spot, fingertips brushing your sweatshirt. His warmth leaves you as you make it over, watching as he easily clears the fencing with one smooth movement.

“Any spot in particular?”

As an answer, you grab Joel’s hand. Nerves bubble in your stomach, two steps ahead with your arm outstretched behind. His larger strides are quick to close the gap, arms between your bodies with palms pressed together. His hand shifts in yours, fingers lacing with yours and curling around the outside of your smaller hand, his thumb skimming back and forth.

Steps slow at a small clearing in the tall, overgrown grass, settling down on the dewy ground. He lays back with you, not focusing on the stars right away. His eyes are a cooler shade in the moonlight, yet no warmth is lost in the way he looks as if he’d been waiting for this moment.

Suddenly aware of yourself under his stare, you lightly clear your throat and turn toward the sky. “Do you know a lot about astronomy? I never got to learn much, other than my brother teaching me how to find the north star to navigate.”

Joel’s attention moves to the stars, his voice coming out lower and softer than in the daylight, “I used to know a lot more. Did a lot of camping before and learned to find the major constellations. Taught Ellie some of ‘em, and now she’s got a few books on astronomy. She kept saying how she wanted to fly, go to space or the moon like Sally Ride.”

“She’d be a pretty badass astronaut.”

He laughs softly, nodding before his expression settles into one of reminiscence and guilt all muddled together.

“You’re not wrong,” he pauses shortly before continuing, “But, I think I can still remember most of the constellations. What’s that thing called where you’re assigned one when you’re born?”

“Astrology?”

“That’s it. I know where my constellation is. I’m a Libra, whatever that means.”

Joel lifts your joined hands, his index fingers extended as he traces out the shape of scales in the corner of the sky.

Pulling the limited memories you have from the book you’d found sitting on a shelf at home, you follow Joel’s finger, “Libras are supposed to be balanced, that’s the whole scales thing, I guess. And impartial, but sometimes indecisive. Oh, and charming.”

Joel nestles your hands back on the ground. “Balanced, impartial, and indecisive? Sounds a lil’ vague, darlin’. Not sure I’m believin’ the stars can tell you about your personality.”

“Well, they got the charming part right about you. You’re certainly a Southern gentleman, got ladies swooning left and right.”

“Nah, I don’t even notice ‘em. Too busy focused on someone I’m pretty charmed by myself.”

You let go of Joel’s hand, turning onto your side to face him. He mirrors you, and you take the chance to lean in. Lips touch together with a brush, breaths fanning over both of your faces as you wait for his response.

Joel sits up, weight resting on his elbow. Broad shoulders lean over to shift you onto your back, rich eyes never leaving you. His touch is confident, a large hand fully cups the side of your face. Fingers sprawl along your jaw, thumb on your cheekbone. His frame leans further over yours, lips hovering as his voice breaks the moment of silence in a rasp, “This okay?”

Your voice thick with anticipation answers, “Yes.”

His kiss sends ripples of tension over your body. Fingers curl into the fabric of his sleeves, feet press into the dewy earth, chest tightens with quickened beating, lips match his depth. He tastes minty from toothpaste, mixed with notes of the Tennessee whiskey he orders. It’s intoxicating, reminders of him to seep into your daily life.

Joel brings you closer with a hand in your hair. His tongue traces your lips, parting them to let him in. When his fingers leave the crown of your head, his touch floats over your body, caressing your waist, sprawling under your breast, and jumping to your exposed thigh. He’s pressing your skin back against your body as if you were going to flow out from under him.

His frame shifts over you, pulling him away and breaths mix from open-mouth exhales. Legs open and hands find purchase on his expansive shoulders, heat pooling at your center when his knees settle between yours.

“You’re so beautiful, darlin’,” Joel’s earthy tone sighs, his hands moving along your body with a rumble of satisfaction brewing out of his chest.

His touch surrounds your cheeks as if he was bringing water up to drink from his hands, only your lips are the means to quench his thirst. You moan into the deep kiss, finding a frantic rhythm together. Fingertips dance along his torso to reach the hem of his navy t-shirt.

Hot, humid kisses line your neck to the collar of your sweatshirt. Tugging at the fabric and slipping his hand underneath, you comply to get the material off. Your t-shirt follows in its wake, the chill of the ground and Joel’s touch spreading goosebumps on your skin.

You breathe out a moan at his teeth scraping the curve of your shoulder, hands pulling at his shirt. He follows the silent order, getting the soft cotton over his head.

His hips grind down, arousal flooding your core. Another moan slips at the feeling of Joel’s breath meeting a small peak on your chest, sucking the pebbled skin.

Hips jerk up against his bulge, Joel’s throaty groan cutting into the night.

“Fuck, baby, you’re so soft…”

He gives the same treatment to the opposite breast and large fingers hook in the waistband of your shorts, tugging lightly to ask permission.

“Touch me, please. Wanna feel you…”

Joel’s lips separate from the skin with a pop. Your shorts come off, Joel retaking his place between your velvety thighs.

His eyes worship your body, dark with lust but still harboring a warmth. A slight ache burns in your hips that you completely ignore when his knuckles brush up your covered slit.

There isn’t a single thought in his head that doesn’t revolve around you.

His fingers slide against the last piece of fabric covering you, feeling your wetness through it. Your delicate sounds encourage him, thumb finding your clit and rubbing slow circles. He watches for a moment, eyes catching your face as you whine.

“Joel, please…”

His teasing doesn’t cease. Instead, he removes his thumb from your clit, hooking his finger to pull your panties to the side and exposing your wetness to the chill of the night.

“Gonna have to tell me what you want, darlin’. Not a mind reader…” He grins as you huff out your frustration.

“Please, Jesus Christ, want your fingers inside of me…” you look at him impatiently as you wait for an answer.

Biting his lip to hold back a groan, he pulls your panties off to leave you completely naked under him. His mouth waters, taking you all in as his touch runs up your bent knees.

Two fingers gather your wetness, pressing harder circles into your clit. Your whimpers egg him on, slipping down to tease your entrance with one finger.

“Good girl. ‘M gonna make this pretty pussy come around my fingers.”

With a smirk, one finger slides into you. Moans fill the still air, the tightness of you around his middle finger making him stiffen. A second finger easily joins the first to work you open.

His name is repeated like a prayer when he hooks his fingers on the uptick, searching for that rough patch inside your walls.

“Fuck, Joel, feels so fucking good,” you writhe under his touch, the sight and sound of you falling apart making him ache. He uses the hand resting on your stomach as a temporary fix for himself, a deep moan interrupting the orchestra of your whimpers and wetness. He pulls his hand away from his jeans, the need to feel you come overpowering his own.

He moves in circles around clit while fingers work in and out quicker, wanton moans growing louder and higher in pitch to accompany the sounds of your drenched cunt.

“So tight around my fingers. Feels good, yeah? You gonna come for me, sweet girl?”

The sounds you make in response are lewd, pleasure overtaking you as you rasp out, “Joel, I-I’m-”

“I know, baby. Let it happen.”

His words push you over the edge, fingers nearly pushed out from how hard you clench around them. Moans flood his ears, and all he can focus on is making that feeling last for you.

Soft breaths return when you’ve recovered, hand finding him hard and working your palm. Fingers open his button and fly, shoving the fabric as far down as you can manage.

“You sure, darlin’? We don’t have to, watching you was enough for me.”

You make your way inside his jeans, fingers wrapping around his cock and stroking slowly. He’d never really been one to care about underwear in the middle of the apocalypse, and right now he was thanking his past, lazy self for the lack of barrier. A shudder ripples down his spine, your touch so much better than his own fist.

“‘M sure, baby. Need you inside of me,” he twitches in your loose grip at the request, pushing his pants down just far enough to free himself.

Nails scrape against his scarred chest, a moan escaping you as he guides the head of his cock through your slick before positioning himself at your entrance.

His eyes lock onto where your bodies meet as he enters with a gentle thrust, your nails biting into the skin under his collarbone. He looks for a second at your face, your nod permission for him to move once you’ve adjusted to the stretch.

He nearly comes at the sight of you taking him fully, your tightness and warmth making the edges of his vision blur. “So, so good, baby…Feels so tight and warm and wet. Perfect, you’re perfect.”

Wetness pools around the base of him and onto the grass below, drenching the sound of skin meeting skin. He watches your eyes screw shut, whimpering as you take every thrust, “Fuck, Joel. Feel so full, ‘m close already.”

His hips work you harder, feeling that taut rope in his gut near its breaking point. One hand leaves your leg held against him, licking his thumb to make quick movements on your clit. His name tumbles from your lips in a high-pitched whine and your head presses back against the ground.

“Come for me, baby.”

Your walls grip him tighter and nearly knock the wind out of his lungs, your back arching off of the grass and nails biting into his shoulders. Eyes open when you settle, clouded and full of pleasure. His thrusts grow sloppy as he chases after his own high.

“Fuck, ‘m close. Feel so damn good.”

“Come for me, please Joel, wanna see you come.”

Your begging snaps that taut feeling in his gut; he quickly pulls out and replaces your warmth with his fist. His chin falls to his chest with a guttural moan as he watches his spend cover your lower stomach, glistening in the soft light. Warmth spreads across his body in a tingle, pleasure clearing his head.

They say drowning is one of the more peaceful ways to go. Once the first few breaths of water fill your lungs, your muscles relax and there’s a warmth that washes over you. Then you pass out and everything goes black. It’s not comfortable, but the tranquility makes it better.

Joel feels like he’s drowned in you, muscles relaxed, warm peace in his chest. His vision is black for a moment, breaths deep in recovery. His eyes adjust to see moonlight flooding your face and body in cool blue. His hands start roaming again, softer this time. Pulling out of you slowly, your whimper meets his small hiss.

He lays you on your side to face him, your form molding like fresh clay.

“You okay?”

Your eyes close contently when his fingers brush your hair from your face, humming, “Fantastic. I wanted that to happen ever since I met you.”

His heart beats quicker at your confession, his mind immediately repeating those words - you’re going to fail her, too.

He only holds you closer in response, and by the time you’re both dressed again and walking back to your street, he knows that he can’t let this continue.

Guilt harbored in his chest over forcing himself to avoid you for weeks after you’d given him exactly what he longed for. He didn’t want you to think that he saw you as a one-night stand, it had felt like more than he wanted to admit, but he couldn’t seek you out to apologize. If he saw you alone, he’d end up doing it all over again. He didn’t regret it. He was just trying to do right by you. Give you space, give you the means to move on before you’d drift too far into the deep end with him.

So he decided to move on himself, try to force your hand into someone else’s if you saw him coupled up. It was cruel, but that’s who he was deep down. Cruel, guilty, undeserving.

He asked Tommy to set him up with someone, and his brother told him about a nice widow who’d been in Jackson since the beginning and had mentioned how cute she thought Joel was. That was enough for him. He asked her out that night.

He’d been dating Heather for a couple of months now. She was pretty, with medium blonde hair and blue eyes. Not much younger than him. Everyone knew they were together, and he assumed that meant you did too. He’d seen you around, eyes never meeting while he walked to his house hand-in-hand with her. He heard rumors of you leaving the Tipsy Bison with a guy in tow a few times, and despite the pang of jealousy that he felt, he kept reminding himself that this was right. You’d fall in love with that guy or someone else, forgetting all about him.

A few months of dating led them to a quick engagement. Joel still couldn’t get you out of his head and took extreme measures to ensure nothing more would happen. They got married in his backyard in a small ceremony. The occasion was lowkey, at the request of Joel. Word spread after the first outing Joel had taken to the market, the silver band on his finger telling everyone what they wanted to know. Each conversation came with congratulations to him and his new wife. He returned them with tight, polite smiles, hiding the oozing guilt that was filling his chest.

Joel had found out that you’d skipped work a few times when Tommy mentioned it in passing on patrol, which was extremely unlike you considering you loved your job. He knew it was because of his marriage.

He tried to bury his worry, telling himself that he was doing the right thing. For him and for you.

Heather had lived her young life with her first husband, she wouldn’t grow to resent him for what he failed to give her. You would move on, as he did, and find some nice guy to settle down with, who could give you what you were looking for. What you deserved.

The worry carried over the day, his brain jumping to worst-case scenarios. He had to make sure you were okay. He would knock on your door to see if you were there. It was the neighborly thing to do.

Joel silently left his bed with his wife sleeping next to him, slipping out the front door in the hours before dawn. He needed to check on you, even if he had to look in through your windows to make sure you were alive. Knuckles lightly rapped on your door, and just as he was nearly about to go find your bedroom window, the door cracked apart from the jamb, and your face was lit by the soft night light.

“What are you doing here?” He can taste the bitterness in your tone.

He swallows down at the toes of his boots, raising both shoulders in a small shrug.

“Tommy said you skipped out on work most of this week. Just wanted to make sure you were alright. That you were alive.” He tries to joke, but your expression remains annoyed.

“Well, I’m fine. Alive. You should probably go, your wife’s at home.”

The door starts to shut, but he quickly grips the edge, rasping out, “I need to talk to you.”

You pause for a second before opening the door. Not waiting for him, you move to sit on your couch. Joel strides over, sitting at the other end and cheating his body towards you curled up in the corner.

“What do you need to talk about?”

“I need to apologize to you. I shouldn’t have ignored you after that night. Hell, that night shouldn’t have even happened. I got caught up-”

“Do you regret it?”

He thinks about saying yes. It would make everything so much easier. You could hate him, call him an asshole for fucking you and breaking your heart. But he can’t lie to you.

“No. I could never regret it.”

“So why shouldn’t it have happened?”

He sighs, wringing his hands together and resting his elbows on his knees.

“Honestly? I’ve been trying so hard to do right by you, darlin’. You deserve so much more than me. I’m broken, bruised, scarred. I’ve lived an ugly life, and I don’t want to end up giving any part of it to you. I can barely live with myself for the things I’ve done, even if I’ve done them to save my people. I’ve lost so much, and taken all the same. You’re so bright. I see it in that beautiful smile of yours. You deserve someone who can add beauty to your life, to live a long while with you. I can’t do that for you. All I’m going to do is fail you; it’s all I can seem to do these days. So I chose for us, and I moved on, and I hope you can find the same thing.”

After a breath, he feels like he can face you. That confidence crumbles immediately when he sees the tears streaming down your cheeks, the soft sniffle as you wipe your runny nose with your sleeve.

“That’s not true, Joel. You could never fail me because all I ever wanted you to give me was yourself. I love you, Joel. You are someone that can give me a beautiful life. Or could’ve, I guess, but now…” your eyes flick to the band on his left ring finger, “What you did was so fucking selfish, Joel. You couldn’t even have a conversation with me. And no matter how angry I get with you, I still can’t help but fucking love you.”

All he can do is kiss you. He’s spilling every emotion he can’t speak into this kiss. It would be wrong to tell you what you want to hear from him, even if it hurts to keep it inside him. His hands run over your body, gathering you in his arms and guiding you back to your bedroom.

He shouldn’t keep going. He should stop. But the feeling of your lips on his, your soft skin in his hands, and the fact that you love him keep his feet moving down the short hallway.

He can’t give you up. He was in way too deep and he would be damned if he wasn’t going to pull you in with him.

Despite the anger, sadness, and betrayal, your love for him overpowered it all. You needed to show him, to let him go with a searing memory of how you feel.

All of the actions between you two are sloppier than before. Each touch is rougher, grabbing at whatever you can take in the midst of heady kisses. Every movement is filled with unspoken words.

Joel gently pushes you the last few inches onto your bed, kicking off his boots and working at the buttons of his shirt, “Take it all off, baby, don't wanna waste a second.”

You’re only apart for as long as it takes for clothes to be shed. Back against the pillows of your unmade bed, arms pull Joel in and legs spread wide. His weight is supported with one arm, a soft moan exhaled as he bites his mark into your neck. Fingers move through your wetness, circling your clit.

It’s your turn to be selfish, and all you want is for Joel to feel himself inside of you. To remember what it’s like to have you when he goes home. To think about you when he fucks his wife. It feels wrong to want that, but you can’t help but feel a claim over him. The fingers tangled in his hair pull his head from its spot at the curve of your shoulder. You meet his lust-blown eyes and speak your demand.

“Fuck me, please, I need you now.”

Joel groans, fingers ceasing their movement as he questions you, “You sure, darlin’? You ready for me right now?”

“Yes, ‘m ready, please, baby,” you plead with him.

Joel repositions himself upright on his knees between your wide legs, stroking himself to get fully hard. He drags the head of his cock up your slit, coating it with your wetness before he presses the tip inside of you. You feel a tinge of pain as he splits you open, but you whisper for him to keep going.

When he’s completely inside of you, Joel sighs out your name, hands gripping your thighs and bringing one up to wrap around his waist, allowing him to sink further.

“Please, Joel, want it hard…” you whimper out, feeling the sensation of him in your gut. Joel needs no further instructions, pulling back to fuck into you hard and deep.

He watches where your bodies connect, how the drag of his cock swells your cunt. Lip pulled between his teeth, the sight makes his hips snap roughly against yours.

He’s leaving bruises with how tight he’s holding onto you, keeping you from moving up the mattress with the power of his thrusts. You don’t say anything until Joel breaks, fucking you with a possessive drive, “Mine. You’re all mine.”

“Only yours, baby. ‘M only ever gonna be yours.”

“You’re made for me, sweet girl, made to take me. Feel so fucking good, such a perfect pussy.”

You’re relieved when his eyes leave yours as he watches him hit inside you again, tears pricking your eyes from the pain and pleasure pounding through you and the thought that he won’t ever be completely yours.

That stupid piece of metal around his finger burns against the skin of your thigh. It should be a symbol of you, not someone else.

Hurt, anger, and pleasure meld together. Hands move to Joel’s shoulders, using your strength to flip over. His back hits the crumpled pillows at the headboard, sitting up as you straddle him.

“Look so beautiful on top of me, baby,” his chest rises and falls in quick succession, the next inhale sharper as you sink down completely, watching his eyes screw shut and a deep moan vibrate his chest.

“Oh fuck, take what you need, darlin’. Use my cock. I’ll give you whatever you want.”

Your mouth opens to tell him you can’t have what you want most. Because of what he decided for the both of you. Instead, a moan tumbles out, hips starting to roll to work him back to that near-ecstasy feeling. The room is filled with the wet smacks of skin meeting skin mixed with wanton moans. Your movements keep you both near the edge, your head back and eyes closed as you scream Joel’s name. He doesn’t reprimand you for potentially exposing yourselves to the neighbors, only reaching a hand to the back of your neck and pulling you in for a passionate kiss. You can tell he’s close when his feet dig into the mattress, hips under his vice grip. He starts fucking up into you, both of your rhythms meeting to work you higher. One hand leaves his chest to hold the side of his head, forcing him to meet your eyes.

“‘M yours…” you echo his lust-filled words. You need to remind him that at least part of him will always belong to you, that only you can make him feel this good, this loved. That you’re the one who fucks him like this. “Made for you, right? Just for you, baby. No one besides you can make me feel this good, make me come like you can. Ruined me for everyone else.”

“Mhmm, that’s fuckin’ right, darlin’. This pussy’s mine. You belong to me, all to me.” Joel’s thrusts become frantic and you lose your rhythm, his fingers finding your clit and rubbing quick circles.

You come hard, screaming his name again and whining with each thrust after your intense orgasm. Joel’s right behind you, your sounds pushing him over the edge. Warm ropes coat your walls, his husky groan reverberating under your palms pressed to his chest. Your voice can barely reach a whisper when you look at him, fingers moving to tug his hair, “And you belong to me.”

He doesn’t say anything if he even hears you, his skin sticking against yours and his come dripping out of you onto his stomach when you move to lie down. Joel gets up after he steadies his breath to grab a warm cloth from the bathroom to clean you up. He crawls back into bed, slipping under the covers after tossing the dirty washcloth into the hamper. Your head finds his chest, curling up into his side with his arm wrapping you up. He kisses your forehead as you drift off, feelings of guilt, anger, and love rising from your gut to sit square in your chest.

Cold sheets. That’s what you wake up to. Sitting up in bed, you glance around your room with sleepy eyes, searching for any evidence of Joel.

Nothing. He must’ve left after you fell asleep. You can’t blame him. It definitely wouldn’t look the best if his wife woke up in the morning and he was nowhere to be found. And he couldn’t risk someone seeing him sneak out of yours in the morning light.

You’re remembering your confession that was met with his claim over your body. Your own stupid attempt to make him believe that he belonged only to you, spurred on by his possessive words.

Something on the nightstand catches your eye. A note from Joel:

Meet me at our spot tonight, sweet girl

You met him that night, and nearly every night since then, too. Mostly in that overgrown field behind the barn, sometimes at yours when you craved complete comfort of the couch or bed.

Joel started staying later with you, holding you after the possessive claims he made over you like a prayer. He opened up about his time with Ellie before Jackson, stories about Boston, about Tess. What it was like growing up with Tommy, confessing he loved to sing and play guitar, even wanted to be a singer when he was younger and somehow ended up as a contractor. He even told you about his daughter Sarah, how beautiful and bright she was.

You told him your own story too. Leaving the Chicago QZ with your brother and sister when everything went to shit with FEDRA and the Fireflies. How you lost your sister soon after, bit by a straggling clicker in a gas station you were raiding. How your brother was the one to shoot her when she begged you both. Stories about traveling west with him, how he protected you until the day he died. You were chased by raiders looking to kill you both for your supplies, running through the forest just along the river outside of Jackson. You didn’t know the community was there, but it ended up being your saving grace. Your brother pushed you to run over the bridge, the men finally catching up to him. You couldn’t stop, couldn’t look back. All you could do was scream as you heard a gunshot.

Joel held you as you cried, you comforted him when he needed it. He never told you what happened after he and Ellie left Jackson that first time, he didn’t have to if he didn’t ever want to. These vulnerable moments brought you closer together.

But it was never close enough to stop the cycle he developed of pushing you away after a few weeks together, getting so in his head about the situation, feeling guilty, or getting paranoid if he suspects that Tommy or Maria or his wife are catching on. His abandonment would last a few days or even a week at a time.

And you always wait it out, always come back when he wants you.

Like a dog with a bird at his door, you gave all of yourself to him.

It’s a late night at work for you. Joel parked himself on his usual stool, drinking ‘til last call after his buddies left, something he’d done often in the last few weeks.

Tommy finished restocking the fridges under the counter and tossed you the keys to lock up. As he leaves, he gives Joel a knowing look and you a sympathetic one.

Joel slaps his hands against the bar top, standing when you walk from behind the counter. His steps falter a bit as he gets used to the ground underneath him. Steadying him with an arm around his back, he wraps his own around your shoulders to keep you at his side.

“Let me walk you home, baby.” Words slurs together, eyes half-lidded and glazed over. It would be a bit endearing to see him without his usual stoic persona, but the fact that this is the third night this week that he’s gotten this drunk is concerning.

You end up carrying Joel all the way home, and just when you’re about to get him to his front door, his strength overpowers your own and he pulls you away with him, dragging you two in a drunken stupor down the road.

His steps are heavy and sporadic while he whistles some song in your ear, reaching the field. He flops down into the grass, his arms sneaking around your waist when lay down with him. Joel pulls you in close, kissing you deeply and sighing against your mouth. He smells of whiskey, leather, and musk; all combining to be uniquely Joel.

You couldn’t bring yourself to argue with him about getting home so you let him kiss you, let his hand under your shirt. You listened to him recollecting the night with the patrol guys. The only touches exchanged were his fingertips running up and down your side under your loose t-shirt and your cheek pressed against his denim-covered chest.

He brought up a song that was playing on a record at the bar, John Lennon’s Woman. He reminisced about hearing that song as a young teen for the first time, and telling you how a couple of years later he wrote the lyrics down for his tenth-grade girlfriend, telling her he wrote a poem for her.

“She read it, obviously knowing the song. She crumpled it up, said ‘That’s John Lennon, not you, Joel Miller,” and walked away from me. Needless to say, she broke up with me.”

“Wow, a breakup over plagiarism. Must’ve been a real stickler for academic honesty,” you reply, sending both of you into giggles.

His laugh faded slightly, the wrinkles still showing next to his eyes and his smile lines present, jovially commenting, “You probably barely even know who John Lennon is.”

He laughs but his words made you feel small. He teased you before about the age difference, but for some reason, you couldn’t brush this one off.

“Y’know, I still remember what life was like then.”

His hand finds your chin, tilting your head up with a sigh, “That’s not what I meant, darlin’, you know I was just teasin’. You probably didn’t even know it was John Lennon if you heard one of his songs when you were young, baby.” You sit up quickly, separating from him.

“He was a fucking Beatle! Like the biggest band ever. I might be younger than you, but I’m not stupid. They were around even before you were born, so yeah, I do know who John Lennon is. And did you know he cheated on his first wife, like, a bunch of times and left her for one of those women? Sound familiar, Joel? Actually, probably not, ‘cause you’d never actually admit how you feel about me and leave your wife, even though you love me,” your words come out before you even have a chance to think about them, and as you look at Joel, you can tell he’s letting his anger and annoyance come over him, his expression turning to stone, “I feel like you just see me as some naive girl who doesn’t know anything or hasn’t dealt with shit in this world -”

“You haven’t done nearly a fraction of what I’ve had to do in this world, darlin’, so don’t get started. You are a naive girl. You’ve always had someone to protect you, and I’ve always been the protector. You don’t know nothin’ about losing yourself or having to do the worst possible thing just to save yourself or your people,” his voice is low and unwavering with an intensity you hadn’t heard before. He’s trying to hurt you now, bringing up the protection that you’d been given by your brother before he died to save you, the fact that you’ve always had support from him or the people of Jackson.

Your eyes gloss over, blurring his hunched-over figure. His words are venom seeping through the well-worn cracks in your heart. Curling up into a ball and chin on your kneecaps, pressing down into the bone to keep your lips from trembling. How childish you must look like this. Joel doesn’t move to comfort you, staring a thousand yards ahead, emotionless.

“I know you think I don’t know the guilt or pain or heartbreak that you feel 'cause I’ve been protected for a lot of my life in this world. But being in love with you, being some dirty secret to you, has given me enough guilt, pain, and heartbreak to last for the rest of my life.”

A shaky breath slipped out of your parted lips, untangling your limbs from their locked positions to stand. You turn away, legs carrying you home. You don’t look back, wiping your tears away as quickly as they fall. You’re exhausted from him, from this whirlpool of loving and leaving that he’s pulled you into. A part of you breaks just the slightest bit more, a new piece for you to mend whenever he calls you back.

You should hate Joel. He pulled you in and pushed you away, and all you could do was fall, but now it felt like sinking. And your feet won’t ever touch the bottom.

He’s taken your love willingly, and only given you possessive invocations over your body, only made your constant pain burn hotter. Linen soaked up the tears that were left on your cheeks as you laid down in bed, exhaustion taking over.

The image you see feels warm, blurred around the edges. It was his home, no sign of his wife but evidence of Ellie in the comic book and worn-out sneakers near the chair across the room. Soft strums of a guitar float around, and your sights lock on him at the other end of the couch. You have this feeling that you need to say something to him, but can’t remember for the life of you what it is; the moment overwhelming. He’s singing and playing guitar, unabashed, and with a genuine smile only for you. Tender brown eyes glance away as someone walks into the room. Ellie’s holding a lopsided birthday cake with a few candles lit. It’s decorated with a sloppy frosting drawing of the ocean, a boat on the horizon. It was a reminder of the daydream you had vocalized to Joel, spending a life on the shore in a small sailboat together. The song he was playing softly fades into Happy Birthday, his smile matching Ellie’s. All you hear, before the image fades, is his voice as you lean in to blow out your candles, “Happy birthday, darlin’. I love you.”

The clinking of stacking glasses is the only sound echoing through the empty bar as you and Tommy close out. Joel’s been ignoring you, has been for a couple of weeks after your fight, spending his free time picking up shifts or staying at home with his family. The rag you’re holding moves in circles over the shiny bar top, reflecting your face back to you. You can see the pain in your eyes seeping back after spending the night putting on a face for your customers.

“You don’t need to keep on paintin’ that pretty smile on your face, hon. I hate seein’ you looking like you’re gonna crack your jaw from forcing yourself to look happy,” Tommy sighs, looking over at you while he continues to polish the glass in his hand. “What he’s doing to you, it’s wrong. You deserve to be treated with respect.”

“He wasn’t doin’ anything I wasn’t letting him do. It takes two, Tommy. Think you’d know that with a newborn around,” you try to lighten the mood, kicking yourself for still defending Joel.

“I know. But I also know how you look at him. Like you’ve been drownin’ at sea and he’s the one who’s come along to save you.” You finally look up from your reflection on the bar surface; the shame in your face becomes too much for you.

“At this point, it feels more like he’s the one pulling me under.”

Tommy sets the glass down and tosses the rag at it. Closing the small space between, he pulls you against his chest, arms around your shoulders. You can’t cry in front of him, embarrassed that he even knows about you and Joel in the first place, let alone that he feels sorry for you. You reciprocate the hug, gingerly wrapping your arms around his torso. The sound of the door swinging echoes in the large room. Tommy let’s you out of his comforting embrace and turns to meet the late patron.

Joel.

He’s standing across the room, eyes moving between his brother and you. He came looking for you, not expecting Tommy to still be closing out the bar with the baby at home. A furrowed brow creases lines between those soft, guilt-ridden brown eyes. The same look he’s had every time he’s shown up at your door at 2 AM to apologize, kiss you, show you how much he needs you. You fall every time, wanting to be his comfort, his relief. His lighthouse in the storm of remorse he’s constantly battling. Loyal to a fault.

At this moment, you wish for a wave to pull you under and sweep you into the tide.

Tommy asked him to wait outside.

Asked is generous. More like, grabbed Joel by the collar and dragged him outside like a scolded puppy, pointing his finger and giving him a strong, “Stay.”

He did as he was told, leaning against the post at the top of the stairs. Arms crossed over his chest and anxiously tapping his foot against the wood porch.

Both you and Tommy left at the same time. Joel would be knocked out on the spot if Tommy had his way, judging by the look on his face. The younger Miller wished you goodnight and you gave him a reassuring nod as you stayed back to face Joel.

Tommy’s out of sight and out of earshot before you break the silence.

“So…why’d you come here? Thought you’d be done with the naive girl.”

Joel raises to his full height, taking a hesitant step toward you. You don’t move away, but he keeps his distance in order to get his thoughts out.

“Darlin’, I’m -” he starts, pausng for a moment to gather his words, “I keep doin’ this, don’t I? Being happy with you, then pushing you away and hurting you. I’m sorry, sweet girl. I’m so, so sorry. I don’t want to fight with you. I shouldn’t have said those things to you, I know what you’ve been through. You’re not naive. You’re mindful, attentive in ways I could never be. I hurt you. I haven’t done this the right way. I haven’t protected you like I should’ve 'cause I couldn’t stay away from you. I’m what you needed saving from and I’ve been too selfish to keep us both from drowning.”

You worry your lip between your teeth as tears gloss over your eyes. He steps closer to you, hands reaching up to cup your face. He’s not sure if you’re going to slip between his fingers, but he’s trying his best to keep you there with him. Tears fall, his thumbs working to wipe them away. Not letting a drop of you to slip away from his touch.

He can see the innerworkings of your brain in your eyes. He knows how to read you; he can see the battle in your head about whether or not he’s saved this time. Your voice is coated in emotion when you finally speak up again, “I’ve heard drowning is actually kind of a peaceful way to go, all things considered. And if it’s going to be with anyone, I’d choose you.”

That damn smile finds its way across your face in spite of your tears, and he can’t help but mirror it. It’s a welcome home for him, the light pulling him into your harbor - safe once again. He leans down to press a soft, tender kiss to your lips, deepening it for a moment when you reciprocate.

His hand finds yours when he pulls away, “Let’s go for a walk, sweet girl.”

Joel leads you away from the bar, walking down your street. You slow down when you get in front of your cottage, moving to walk down your path. He stops you, shaking his head and mouth ticking up in a small smile. His eyebrows are raised in a silent question, asking you to come with him. You fold easily, taking your place next to his side, hands intertwined.

He takes you to your spot where he’s set up a blanket and a couple of flickering lanterns for some light, but not enough to disturb the view of the moon.

“Joel…this is wonderful, I’m - I don’t know what to say, thank you.” Your hand squeezes his and he shrugs the praise off.

“Don’t thank me, baby, I should be doin’ this for you all the time. ‘S what you deserve.”

He’d gotten a couple of strange stares when he’d been walking down the road with a blanket under one arm and the lanterns in his hand. It occurred to him that people would think he was doing it for his wife, that they might ask her about it tomorrow and he’d be in for a line of questioning. But damn the consequences, he needed to do this for you. To give you something.

Joined hands pointing out more constellations he remembers and ones that Ellie knew, having asked her specifically to help him find the one for your zodiac. As the two of you lay on your backs, curled into each other, he’s taken back to the conversation Ellie and him had about their combined dream of a sheep ranch on the moon. Now that dream, at least for him, included you, too.

“I think it’d be nice out there. Without this world, feeling weightless.” He wishes for that down here, to lighten the load on his chest and the guilt on his shoulders. A different life.

You hum in agreement and he continues, “I wish I could just bring the moon down here, to take the weight off us, and to give Ellie the chance to get her dream.”

You’re quiet for a beat before your words wrap him in warmth, “If I could give you the moon, I would.”

You’d do anything for him, he knows that. And he’d do anything for you.

As those words cross his mind, the ring from his finger burns in his pocket. He’d taken it off to rid you both of the reminder of how this night would end, how every night would end. A little metal circle that has decided your fates, at least for now. His voice is slightly gravelly in his throat as he answers, “Maybe in another life, yeah?”

if you got to the end, i'm giving you a big smooch.

taglist: @swiftispunk (supportive bae)

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a-998h · 3 months

Note

Hi, can I drop a request?

Can you do Reader with personality disorder due to past trauma? They are usually Sun, a cheerful, bright person with a caring and empathic nature. But under extreme stress, anger or sadness, Moon will take over with their cunning, cold and apathic personality. They value no connection except a fierce loyalty and protectiveness to Sun. Moon can be kind and gentle for whom Sun loves, though. Sun and Moon communicates by secret messages hidden in songs and tunes they made.

Hope this is not too much. I really enjoy your works!

🌙 anon if not taken. Or I can be ❄️ anon instead. If both are taken, it's ok.

Of course you can be 🌙 anon, now you can be my second anon.

(This contains mention of trauma and multiple personality disorder as a trauma response, read at your own risk)

They only knew Moon. They were worried about you when you arrived in Teyvat, your silent, apathetic, and cold to them all.

Some characters like Diluc, Alhaitham, Albedo, and those who are also a bit cold themselves don't look into it... at first.

The notice something is off when you're with Itto. You didn't really respond to his energy most of the time. One day while you and the gang are in the streets of Inazuma, and a small fight breaks out. Shinobu notices how you tense up, you look like you're about to run or punch someone. When one of the fighting guys gets a little to close to you... Shinobu noticed how you humming something.

The second sigh to notice was when you were with Kaeya, he had placed a hand on your shoulder and you froze. Not in the "I'm paying attention" way but in the "if I don't move then no one can see me" way. It makes him worried. When he removes his hand from your shoulder and goes to ask you, you're gone.

Everyone starts getting more worried about you. They want to help you. They only learn what's going on, after Sun shows up.

Sun is a strange presence to them. They've only seen Moon and never Sun. But they love Sun, and Sun loves them back. When you were in the library with Lisa, alone, she heard humming coming from you. She thought Sun was humming while reading and didn't think too hard about it...

No one knew why you switched between Sun and Moon or why they seemed to humming random things but it didn't bother them.

They learn what happened to you from Sun. Sun was talking with Eula and said, "you're nicer then her." This causes Eula to freeze. She keeps asking questions and Sun gives vague answers. But Eula and other put together what they know, and Kaeya and Shinobu bring up what they saw with Moon.

The pieces come together, and give them a horrific picture. Trauma, something so bad happened to you that you had to create the personality of Moon to protect your Sun. They're all horrified and made it the personal mission to make you feel better.

As they make you more comfortable, they realize the Moon is warmer than they originally thought.

Now, Sun and Moon, who hurt you? Don't worry, they aren't gonna hurt you. Let them know who hurt you so they can make your life easier from now on.

#genshin fanfic #sagau #creator!reader #genshin x reader #sagau lore #cult au #genshin impact x reader #genshin imagines #🌙 Anon #tw trauma #Tw multiple personality #if you don't read trigger warnings i'm not liabel

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lousypotatoes · 2 months

Text

And I'm Ready For Love

Song Recommendation:

All Alone - Al Jolson

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9

90 years ago...

The flower shop had mostly been today, only a few customers coming in.

All throughout the day, Y/N waited patiently for Alastor to show up. Alastor never showed up at a specific time, he just showed up a random time.

As the shop was ten minutes away from closing, Y/N was starting to feel sad. Since they met at her shop, he hadn't missed a single day.

"Maybe he's just busy," Y/N muttered to herself. "I'll see him tonight, so it's fine."

As she started to close up the shop, her heart began to pound rapidly, despite the date not being three hours away.

She started walking home as fast as she could, wanting to get home and get ready. She already had her outfit picked out and she had an idea of how she wanted to do her makeup and her hair, but she knew that she was going to make some changes.

Y/N got home and immediately went into her bedroom, after giving Honey a quick pet, of course.

She got rid of her work clothes and put on her dress, admiring the way the dress hugged tightly around her body and showing off her curves. She picked out this dress because it was red, and she knew that red was Alastor's favorite color.

Moving on to her makeup, she started applying her blush when she noticed her hands were trembling. Y/N didn't realize how nervous she was until now. Taking deep breaths, she attempted to calm herself down. When she did, she finished applying her blush and moved on to her mascara.

Looking at the clock on the wall, her eyes widened, seeing she only had forty-five minutes left to get ready.

'How did the time go by that fast?' Y/N thought, grabbing her curling iron.

As fast as she could, she curled her H/C hair, concentrating hard not to burn her fingers.

At last, Y/N finished getting ready, with five minutes left to spare. Going out in the living room, she put on her gloves and her heels and waited patiently in the living room.

As she waited, she got to thinking. It had been a while since Y/N had been on a real date. The only dates she had been on were with targets, who people had hired her to kill. And obviously, Y/N wasn't going to kill Alastor. She really hoped that it would go well.

A knock at the door and the sound of Honey barking interrupted her thoughts.

"Oh dear," she muttered, getting up from the couch, walking over to answer the door.

"Alastor!" she said, opening the door. "You've arrived right on time!"

"Well, it would of be impolite of me to show up late," Alastor said, handing Y/N a bouquet of Daisies. "These are for you, my dear."

A genuine smile placed itself on Y/N's lips. Alastor quite liked the sight of it.

"Oh, you remembered," she said in awe. "Thank you so much, Alastor."

"There's no need to thank me," Alastor waved off. "I knew you would like them."

"Oh, where are my manners," Y/N said, stepping aside. "Please, come in while I find a vase for these flowers."

"Thank you, dear,"

Alastor stepped inside, admiring the her house while Y/N looked for a vase.

Looking around, Alastor's eyes landed on Honey, who was staring at him, growling.

"Oh, who is this little creature?" Alastor asked.

"That's Honey," Y/N said, finally finding a vase. "She's friendly. Feel free to pet her if you want."

Alastor sat down on her couch, Honey immediately dropped the 'tough guy' act and crawled onto his lap.

"You're a charming little thing, aren't you?" Alastor cooed, scratching Honey behind the ears.

Y/N smiled at the interaction, as she put the flowers and some water in the vase. "I've had her since she was a pup," she explained. "She'll be turnin' eleven in a few weeks."

"Eleven years old?" Alastor said, surprised. "She doesn't have a single gray hair on her body."

"I get that response all the time," she giggled. "Ready to hit the road, Al?"

"If you are, then yes," Alastor said, removing Honey from his lap.

"Goodbye, my love," Y/N cooed, patting Honey on the head. "I'll be home later tonight.

Alastor grinned, seeing how much you she adored and loved her dog. While he was looking, his eyes began to wander, not in a sexual way, but in 'oh my goodness she looks so gorgeous,' way. The way the light of the room made the dress look even more beautiful.

"Beautiful," Alastor muttered.

"What was that?"

"I forgot to mention," Alastor cleared his throat. "You look positively radiant, my dear."

Y/N hoped that the darkness of the night sky would hide her blush. "Thank you, Alastor. You don't look that bad yourself."

"The means the world coming from you dear," he chuckled.

"Where exactly are you takin' me?" Y/N asked, curiously.

"Well, since I invited for a drink," he said. "It's only natural that I'm taking you to a bar."

Y/N blushed, feeling embarrassed for asking such a stupid question. "I apologize for askin' such a simple question," she laughed awkwardly.

"There's no need to apologize, dear," Alastor said, smiling. "I found it quite adorable, actually."

"You sure do have a way with words, don't you?" she rolled in her eyes in a playful way.

"That depends," he said. "Is it working?"

"Maybe,"

Alastor grinned at the two of them flirting.

"We should be arriving in a few minutes," Alastor said, looking at his watch. "I hope it hasn't been too much of a walk for you."

"I've walked around New Orleans more time than I can count," Y/N frowned, crossing her arms. "I reckon I'll be fine."

"I didn't mean any offense," Alastor said at once, seeing the frown on her face. "I just wasn't certain if you were used to walking or not, my apologies for any misunderstanding."

"It's fine, Al," she said. "At least you had the decency to apologize. Most men just think I'm a delicate little flower."

"Any sensible man would be daft to perceive you in that way, my dear," he said as the two of them approached the bar. "We're here by the way."

"Really?" Y/N gasped in fake surprise. "I didn't know that."

Alastor smirked. "Just making sure your eyes are in working condition, dear"

"I reckon my eyesight is better than yours," she laughed as they headed into the bar.

Looking around the place, Y/N saw that it just looked like a regular bar, just a little bit cleaner than the ones she as so used to. There were people drinking, dancing, and socializing with their friends or dates.

"You come here often?" Y/N asked as they walked over to the bar.

"As often as I can," Alastor said. "A very good friend of mine actually owns the place."

"What can I fetch for you, ma'am?" the bartender asked, wiping down the bar surface.

"Just a spot of whiskey would be nice, thank you kindly."

"And for you, sir?" the bartender asked Alastor.

"I'll have what she's having."

"Coming right up,"

"I didn't know you drank whiskey," he said as the bartender began pouring the drink.

"Ah, well," Y/N said as the bartender gave them their drinks. "I am full of mysteries."

"And I look forward to uncovering each one," he said as he sipped on his whiskey. Y/N almost choked on her drink.

Just as Alastor was about to pay, a voice distracted him.

"Alastor! I can't believe you didn't say hi to little ol' me!"

Looking over Alastor's shoulder, Y/N saw a short, blonde, and plump woman wearing a flapper dress walking towards them.

"Mimzy!" Alastor exclaimed. "I didn't know you'd be working this evening!"

"Yeah well, some bitch decided to quit, so now I'm stuck takin' over her shift," she said, eyes landing on Y/N. "Oooooh, is this Y/N?"

Alastor immediately felt his face flush, forgetting that he talked a lot of Y/N to Mimzy. He cleared his throat. "Yes indeed!" he said. "Y/N this here's Mimzy, the close friend I was just telling you about."

"It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Mimzy," Y/N said, offering her hand for Mimzy to shake.

"The pleasure's all mine, doll," Mimzy said, eagerly shaking Y/N's hand. "Any pal of Alastor's is a friend of mine!"

Y/N looked up at Alastor with a smug grin knowing that he talked about to her Mimzy. She was sure gonna tease him about it later.

"You didn't tell me she was so fetchin', Al," Mimzy said, nudging Alastor in the ribs. "Where have you been hidin', sweetie?"

"In my floral shop," Y/N laughed awkwardly, not really knowing what to say. Since Mimzy was one of Alastor's close friends, she wanted to make a good first impression on her but didn't know.

"Alastor's always praisin' you, ya know?" Mimzy said, making Y/N blush, glancing up at Alastor again, she saw he was also blushing "Talkin' 'bout your shop, your wit, your looks-"

"I think that's enough, Mimzy," Alastor said suddenly. "Now if you'll excuse us, Y/N and I would like to carry on with our evening."

"Sorry, I didn't realize I was talkin' too much," Mimzy waved off. "I've got some business to attend to anywho. The drinks are on the house for you two the rest of the night." she said, walking off.

"Sorry about her," Alastor grumbled. "She can be a tad overwhelming at times."

"No need for apologies," Y/N giggled. "I quite liked talking to her.

Alastor's frown turned into a grin. "Well, I'm glad! I was hoping you two would hit it off!"

"So," Y/N said, sipping on her whiskey. "Exactly how much do you talk about me, Al?"

Alastor choked on his drink. "You-You heard that?"

"It was kind of hard not to hear,"

"This is quite embarrassing," Alastor said, flustered, pulling on the collar of his shirt while Y/N giggled. "Care to dance?"

"Why of course,"

There were fifteen minutes left until the bar closed. Almost everyone else had gone home, but not Y/N and Al. In those five hours they were there, they had rotated between drinking at the bar and dancing on the dance floor.

The two of them were currently sitting on a couch by the dance floor.

"How are you not drunk?" Y/N asked, taking a drag off her cigarette. "You've knocked back at least five shots of whiskey."

"I've got quite the alcohol tolerance," Alastor said, blowing out some smoke. "What about you, dear? You've downed just as much whiskey as I have."

"Same as you," Y/N said, putting out her cigarette. "But I reckon my tolerance might just be higher than yours."

"Is that a challenge?"

"Maybe,"

"Ah, perhaps another time, seeing as the bar is about to close," he said, also putting out his cigarette. "Care for one last dance?" he said, offering his hand for her to take.

"Why not?" Y/N said, taking his hand, letting him lead her to the dance floor.

As soon as they started dancing, the previous song ended and Singin' In The Rain started playing.

"What a stroke of luck!" Alastor said as the two of them swayed. "Your favorite tune is playing!"

"Looks like luck's on my side then," Isabell giggled, letting Alastor dip her. "Thanks for takin' me out tonight, Al. I'm havin' a real good time."

"I'm enjoying myself too, dear," he smiled. "If anything, I should be thanking you for accepting my invitation."

The two of them remained quiet for the rest of the song, enjoying each other's presence. After the song ended, Mimzy kicked them out of the bar since it was closing, and Alastor walked Y/N home.

"Y'know, you didn't have to walk me home," Y/N said as they walked out of the bar. "I ain't far from here."

"It's no trouble at all," Alastor waved off. "Besides, I don't live too far from you anyway."

"Are you sure?" Y/N asked, worried. "I wouldn't want you to have to walk by yourself all by yourself in the middle of the night."

"Your kind to be concerned, Y/N," he said in a soft voice. "But I assure you, I'll be just fine."

"Alright," she said. "Thank you for walkin' me home, by the way."

"It's no trouble at all, really," he laughed lightly. "Just dawned on me, that was the first time we've talked outside the flower shop."

"I didn't even think about that," Y/N chuckled. "Guess I got too caught up in tonight's excitement."

"If you're up for it," Alastor said, looking down at her, blushing. "Perhaps we could start meeting up outside the flower shop more?"

Y/N's face was on fire. She had hoped he would ask that but didn't actually prepare herself for when he asked that question. "I'd like that a lot," she said, looking up at him.

"Excellent!" he grinned as they reached Y/N's front porch. "My broadcast tomorrow is around 2. If you're free, would you like to grab some lunch with me?"

"Yeah, I'd love too," she said, a cheesy grin on her face. "My lunch break is around noon, we can go then if that works for you."

"Thats perfect! I'll meet you at the flower shop at noon." Alastor said, taking Y/N's hand in his. "Sleep well, my dear, and once again, thank you for agreeing to spend the evening with me."

He brought her knuckles to his lips and kissed them softly.

"Good night, Y/N,"

"Good night, Alastor"

sorry that it took me a little bit to upload 😭

i'll try to get the next chapter uploaded tomorrow to make it up to ya'll i promise

stay safe and drinks lots of water <33

xoxo, Izzy

Taglist 💋

@maksdust

@trippoverrt

@slytherin4ever

@lucifers-silhouette

@a-small-tyrant

@leviwife1

@mo-0-o

@cutiebimbo

@mommymilkers0526

@mikariell95

Sorry I had to do it like this. For some reason, If I did it the way I usually do, the usernames don't show up 😭 I don't know if it's something I'm doing wrong, or if Tumblr is just being weird.

#alastor #character x reader #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel x reader #alastor altruist #alastor x reader #alastor altruist x reader #hazbin hotel alastor #hazbin hotel alastor x reader

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marilynthornhilllover · 11 months

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When you call my name. Do you think i'll come running? {Part 1}

+watch my heart burn

Summary: lady dimitrescu kills your friends but you managed to get away unnoticed, what happens when you go to work for her to get revenge on behalf of your mother? Will fate stand on your side?or will you let feelings get inside?

Lady dimitrescu x maid fem reader

Warning: insomnia, grief,anxiety, fear, slow burn, blood, cut wound, clumsy, slight depression, heartbreak,confusion,bullying, fluff.

A/n: I'm sorry if this is a bit long i just got this idea when i woke up and had to do it😌the song choice fits the fic well, recomend listening👍. Hope you all enjoy my darlings🤗💞

Part 2

You slammed your door as you sat with your knees against your chest hyperventilating. How could she do this to you. She knew what lady dimitrescu did and is capable of and yet she wishes to send you off to work for her just to get money and revenge. How heartless could your mother possibly be. You sobed as flashbacks of the night swept through your mind.

It was your friend avas birthday and you decided to go on a hunt in the woods for fun. See the nature, the beautiful things there and near. You, ava and your other 2 friends. And that's when the beast did her killings. Her long claws brutally killed ava and your friends but you got away without being seen. You were horrified, terrified.

You hated yourself after that. It was your stupid idea to go hunting. You could have went to other places for her birthday, but no you wanted to be adventurous. You got her killed, on her birthday too. ava was a good friend to you. She'll never be forgotten. When you got home you couldn't breath, you kept seeing their bodies.

Years passed and you got over it. You got therapy and you were good now. But when ever you remembered the pure lost souls that died that night, it broke your heart. But it wasn't your fault, no, never , it's not your fault that monster killed your friends, that's on her.

It was the morning of your departure and you were mid.

"You be safe now my love, my dear daughter y/n, be brave my love and remember our plans" your mother whispered in your ear before kissing your cheek.

You turned to the attendant. And softly smiled.

You got into the carriage and waved your mother goodbye. It was a long way from the village to the dimitrescu castle. Fear filled your body as you realized who's territory you were approaching. Who's house you'll be in. Who's rules you'll be following.

You breathe out a shaky breath as the lady turned around to announce your arrival. You nodded shyly, flashed her a soft smile and exited the carriage.

You were immediately met with lady dimitrescu's cold golden eyes. They show no love, no mercy no compassion. But there was a hint of something in them. Sadness? Pain? Tiredness? You didn't know but there was something under all that cover, over all thoses walls that she built up there was some pain, hurt, sorrow.

You immediately flicked your gaze to the ground and walked up to her slowly.

" good evening, lady dimitrescu" you spoke softly, hardly above a whisper. She placed her finger under your chin and averted your gaze to look into her eyes. You got lost in them for a moment. Was she the one who killed your friends? Can't be..... she's so, she looks so pure.

"I asked a question child, speak up" she growled letting your chin fall, removing her cold finger tip from your skin. You couldn't help but miss her touch for a split second. Reminding yourself who you were infront of. Reminding yourself who she is, what she is.

"I-l'm sorry m-my lady, I know you d-don't like to repeat yourself but I did not hear your last w-words" you spoke squeezing your eyes shut, hoping that she doesn't slice you to ribbons.

"Look up child, let me see thoses pretty eyes" she spoke softly. You immediately looked up at her, not wanting to anger her more incase this was a trap.

"I'm soft on newbies, if there are any slip ups, you'll be forgiven. But do not test my patience, my anger is it's own person" she firmly said finding peace and calmness in your eyes. She hummed as she took one last look at you before walking away.

"Elizabeth make sure our new member is welcomed and comfortable, and please do inform my dear daughters of our new maiden. I do not want them snacking on her for dinner" she spoke with a growl like chuckle. As if it's happened already but she didn't care but for you. She wanted no one to hurt you. You were valuable to her. A deal like no other.

The head maiden shows you around the castle, gives you background story on everything etc. She final makes her final stop, your bedroom. She opened the door and your jaw dropped. It was huge. You had a very big bed, almost as big as the bedroom and your own personal bathroom that was even bigger.

"Daniela what are you doing here" Elizabeth spoke firmly with a cocked eyebrow.

Daniela looked up from her book and glanced at you. Her smiled brighten as her eyes gleamed. She squealed as she rushed off the bed to hug you. Her cute and innocent act could have fooled anyone. Fooled you. But Elizabeth has been working here way to long to not see right through her deadly act.

" Daniela dimitrescu but can call me dani, oldest, and-" Elizabeth cut her off with the clearing of her throat. Danielle huffed and backed up.

" dont play what your not daniela. I will not take responsibility for your foolishness, remember you mothers words" she spoke seriously, eyes flashing angrily. Daniella 'ughed' rolled her eyes and disappeared into files.

Elizabeth turns to you and holds you by both arms.

" theses people aren't as dangerous as they look,you hear me. Just don't fall into their trap and DO NOT GET ON THEIR NERVES." She spoke.

"Lady dimitrescu is a very nice lady, especially I she finds you useful. And what she did with you outside she's never done with other maiden. Count yourself lucky cause she already likes you,but do not take it for granted. She doesn't slice anyone to ribbons unless they do a God forbidden thing. Stand your ground, don't look weak, it's yes mistress or yes my lady same goes for when your saying no. Stay away from her daughters unless she asks you to give them something which she wont because your new" she rambled rules and guides for you until she was completely out of breath.

She really cared for you. She's seen some fucked up shit go down in the castle and she's gonna look out for you.

" lastly, the lady always test every new maids loyalty and ability to follow instructions, always listen to what she says and read in-between the lines and pick your words and responds very wisely. Oh and always be up before 7:00, that's it, if I missed any you'll find them in your ground rules book" she kissed your cheek and proceeded to walk out.

" hey lizzy" you called out stoping her in her tracks, though she didn't turn around you can tell she was listening.

"Thank you" you said softly as you smiled. She turned around and flashed you a warm smile.

" of course. Your one of us now y/n. Even though you might not like the lady. You will follow her oders. There's a track if your the exercise type and there's a library. You'll always be working so no time to fool around." She said before closing the door.

You hummed and walked around the room. It was nice. You walked over to the bed where your maid uniform was laid neatly. And bedside it had a note.

- Welcome To House Dimitrescu, your shift starts at 9:30 AM ends at 10:35 pm for now. Any enquiries ask lady sepol, head maiden better known as Elizabeth.

You looked at the time and realized that you only had 20 minutes til you had to be one duty. You quickly got dress and went downstairs. The first thing on your list was doing the dishes then sweeping in the evening and tidying up in the night.

You entered the kitchen but a girl stopped you and pinned a fancy name tagg onto your uniform.

You smiled softly at her but she doesn't smile back, instead she gives you a disgusting look. What's that for you thought to yourself. But then you remembered Elizabeth's words. "Don't show weakness". you must have been so caught up in thought that you didn't even notice you had bumped into someone.

" sorry, I'm so s-" you tried to wip the water off her clothes but she slapped your hand away harshly.

" watch where your going newbie what are you blind? Are has the the salary amount gotten to your head bitch?" She spat glaring at you, before you can apologize again a voice speaks up behind her.

" Oh Leah give her a break. You were once new too" she spoke softly. The girl turned to glare at the woman huffing.

"Yeah but I wasn't this blind was i?" She spoke before walking off bumping into your shoulder harshly.

You sighed as you mouthed 'thank you' to the lady before moving to the sink to do your job.

" Sarah. Sarah mildow. Assistant head maiden" she spoke softly offering you her hand.

You smiled at her and shaked it.

"Y/n y/l/n" you said, she nodded and went back to stacking the wine.

"Don't come off as weak, my sweet girl. But don't fight back" she mumbled, winking at you when she looked up. You pressed your lips together and went back to washing.

"What are you doing?" Asked the same girl from earlier. You wondered if she was crazy... or maybe she's the blind one. Can't she just cut you some slack.

"Didn't you read the freaking ground rules? Only wash the dishes with stain dish soap remover, now your gonna have to wash all those over and now your gonna be late for your next shift But oh well not my problem" she laughed wickly and left.

You bit your lip and growned, now you'll have to re-wash 150 plates. You got to work and finished late. You quickly started doing your second shift for the day and it was around dinner time for the dimitrescu family. As you were sweeping the floor near the kitchen you hear lots of noise.

There's was shouting and yelling and it was loud. How could human beings shout so loud without their voice box being damaged or getting hoarseness But then it hit you. They weren't human.

You entered the dinning room area and quietly sweep the floors. The entire time lady dimitrescu had her eyes fixed on you. You could feel them pulling at you, heating your skin. You tried desperately to make yourself smaller.

" doing that isn't gonna make you disappear draga"she spoke loudly the table going quiet. Her daughters looked at her weirdly but soon realized she wasn't talking to them. Lady dimitrescu has never called a maiden that. Never ever. A couple maids who were picking up the left over foods were astonished. You didn't know what the word meant or what kind of people she says it to but all you knew you wanted to disappear.

"Come take this to the kitchen pet" she spoke firmly, watching as your shakily walked over to her avoiding her gaze. As you picked up the glass, your shaking hands caused it to drop and break. The girls began to laugh as tears welled in your eyes. Can't you do anything right. Lady dimitrescu wasn't angry though, she kept looking at you with curiosity and hope.

" Leah clean this up. As for you my dear get started on your other shift. " she spoke as she got up to leave the table. You were too scared to move. This lady dimitrescu noticed and chuckled. She gently placed her hands on your hips and moved you to the side so she can get up from her chair. Her hands on your waist felt magical.

She held you close as she whispered into your ear. The smell of strong rich people perfume and smoke over take your senses.

" That's already one slip up and it's only your first day,my love"

She removed her hands and walked away, her daughters vanished into a vast of flies. Leah pushed you which caused you to fall and cut your finger on the shareds of glass on the floor. She grabbed your jaw and forced you to look at her.

" i don't hate you y/n, but get your shit together because I don't want to clean up any more maiden blood" she said, letting go of you and walking away to go get the broom.

You finished your shifts and went to your room.

You took a cold shower and went to bed. Thankfully you weren't to late for bed. It's was only 11:08pm. You sighed as you set your alarm for tomorrow and closed your eyes. You twisted and turned no matter what you did you couldn't sleep. Maybe it's because of who's house you were sleeping in.

You sighed as you looked at the time.

12:15pm. You groaned. You really wanted to get some rest before getting for 5:00 tomorrow. You remember Elizabeth said that there's a library. Maybe if you read you'll eventually fall asleep, yeah.

You got up and threw on a thin comfy butterfly multi color robe and went to the library. As you entered your jaw dropped. It was amazing. It was definitely bigger than your room, and it had 4 floors filled with shelfs and books.

You smiled as you walked over to one of the isle. You couldn't find anything you like so you decided to move to a next one. As you came out you saw lady dimitrescu sitting on the couch with her hair undone, makeup off, comfy lace night gown and her reading glasses. Your eyes flicked down to her smooth legs. Her porcelain skin was glowing in the fire place light. It's rare anyone sees her like this.

Your eyes flicked down lower to her red toes and back up to the book she was reading. "Bows and arrows of a fool" it sounds interesting you think to yourself. You flicked your eyes higher to see lady dimitrescu looking at you over her glasses.

Fear builds in you as you quickly pull back and hide.

" I already saw you draga mea. Come out pet" she said sighing as she closed the book. You repeated the word shit over and over again and she shyly came around the corner and stood some distance away from her. You kept looking at the ground and fidgeting with your fingers.

" what difference does it make you look at me in secret but hide your pretty eyes from me in public child" she said changing her position in the chair. You heard how it creaked as it accommodates her weight.

Her eyes racked up your body. Fragile, valuable, fearful, shy there's so many words she can use to describe you just by looking at you.

"Come sit child" she spoke, her tone more soft and gentle. Although alcina was rough and cold on the outside on the inside she was just someone who didn't have a choice, someone who life beat up really bad, someone pure. You moved slowly to stand infront of her, still no eye contact was made.

She pulled you onto her lap and cradled you. Running her hand gently through your hair. You couldn't help but melt into her embrace. Her touch was soft and gentle despise her cold demeanor. She smelled like lavender and wine, with a hint of smoke.

You wrapped your arms around her neck and snuggled into her neck. She gently placed a kiss to your forehead and started rubbing shapes onto your thighs, whispering sweet nothings into your ear.

" couldn't sleep draga?" She asked lifting your chin so she can look at you. You looked so scared, so tried. It broke her heart slightly. After thousands of eyes of feeling no other emotion other than anger and rage, alcina actually felt sorryful. Yet she didn't quite know what for. But holding you made something in her heart break. Maybe it was the love ones she killed for you and didn't know.

If she knew you were the one who got away that night what would she do?. Would she even be holding you? Kissing your skin? Calling you draga.

"Why do you fear me, darling?" She asked truthfully. Why would someone fear her to their core but still wish to be her hand cloth. Money make people do stupid things all the time but working for her, even money wouldn't make someone do something so risky. Especially with the type of anger she holds.

So why does a sweet angel dove like you wish to be in her presence? It simply amazes her. You both got lost in each other's eyes for what seemed like eternity. On til something in you snapped. She killed your friends. But yet here you lay in her arms, fearless. As if nothing happened.

You wanted to ask her the question so bad, why did you do it? There were so many questions you wanted to ask her. Because if she was the brutal monster every one claims she is, why is she so pure?

" I'll take my leave now, my lady" you spoke quietly, removing yourself from her embrace. You were supposed to ask her permission to leave yet her anger is far from building. What spell does this girl have on me, alcina thought to herself. You slowly backed out of the room. Elizabeth's voice ringing in your ear.

" theses people are not as dangerous as they look you hear me?"

"Lady dimitrescu is a very nice lady, especially if she finds you useful"

"What she did with you was rare, count yourself lucky, but don't take in for granted"

You felt dizzy, like your world was spinning. Your friends death flash before your eyes. Alcinas pure eyes. Elizabeth's words. She can't be the monster that killed them.... can she?

The real question is why does she like you? She she have a plan? Because so do you....

You make you way to your room speed walking as fast as you could. Not wanting to run to make a scene to the night shift guard maids. You enter your room and quickly lock the door behind you. You jump into your bed and cover yourself under the duvet.

Tomorrow is a new day. You thought to yourself. Your mother's voice echo in your head.

"She's a monster, but we'll get our revenge."

"Don't trust her y/n, be brave and remember the plan"

You soon fell asleep hoping that tomorrow doesn't cause trouble.....

#lady dimitrescu #lady dimitrescuxreader #alcina x y/n #alcina x maiden #resident evil alcina #alcina demitriscu #alcina x reader #re8 alcina #resdient evil #alcina dimitriscu x reader #alcina dimitrescu #fanfic #fypシ゚viral #slow burn #liturature #Spotify

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whiskeyswifty · 2 months

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i think clara bow is my favorite right now. god it's so good, its so smart and so beautifully produced. it SOUNDS fatalist, like it's the lyrics yes but how it's just her voice and a guitar at the beginning, how her start began. the violins coming in and the way it builds and builds it's sound like her career built over time and how she gets closer and closer to making it, bigger and bigger as a star. and then when she's at the top, she has it all, finally what she wanted, the instrumental falls away as it's quiet at the top, lonely but peaceful because she did it. she can rest now, right? well, then she says "thems the breaks they don't come gently" to transition as on the horizon she sees the new her, just starting out and shiny and new. her tower has already begun to crack and crumble. Finally, the song ends with the same instrumental that it started with, that guitar strums up again just as hers did once, as a new girl, the new her, begins her rise. the one who will take her place has already been born.

it's so poignant to hear her depict it this way, so matter of factly and without any pain or any vindictiveness. having broached this topic before many times before, she's feared it for so long. how her star will one day wane and it won't be her fault. It's just the way of things. but this is a glimpse into how she really feels about it now that its finally happening. what it feels like to see her destroyer in her infancy, knowing who she will grow to be. and what is she to do? smother the infant in it's sleep? another will come, and another and another. the song feels mournful but with resignation that she was once that person to usurp own heroes, and those who idolize her will tear her statue down one day to erect their own in it's place, and that's the way of things. should she prepare this girl, or warn this girl? should she tell her everything that is to come? the song really just takes more of a stance of remove like she'll learn, but she will learn when she faces it, and that's the only way to understand it. growing older and losing that sparkle and shine, which she was still chasing for a while but perhaps has realized there's no use. in all the iterations of this confrontation with her fate before, she's beat back against it, wallowed in deep sadness over it in Nothing New, how she white knuckle held onto it in YOYOK because she's different and special, and even how she quite naively assures her predecessor that she understands, or she thinks she does, but she will not give it away so easily, because not now, not yet, maybe the ones who came before her gave it up so easily but not her, she won't, not ever. but here, it's not a "they WILL say" or a "one day", she says "You look like Taylor Swift" presently, now. she's looking her destroyer in the face. or someone is saying it to her destroyer now. Her statement of it feels like a concession and maybe a recognition, finally, without the anger and without the desperation to hold on. a nod maybe from across the room. as if to say "yes, it's you, it'll be you, if you do it right. I know because you are like me, and I was like the one who came before who were like the one who came before, and on and on it went and on and on it will go. i would say congrats, but one day you'll understand why that isn't quite fitting and why i'm not putting up as much of a fight anymore. and i know now it's not mine to give, but it is yours to take." because maybe it's because she see's with a bit more clarity, finally, that her predecessors might not have left it all behind, bowed out, because they wanted to. perhaps they all felt like her, they were all just like her, never wanting to let go. while the first parts of the song feel like what's happening to her is so singular, what are the odds! perhaps she's never been that special in the grand scheme of things, each of them always like someone else that came before her and there will always be someone like them to come. they all only ever left it because they had to, the writing was on the wall, and they knew that the only choice they had was whether or not they'd bow out gracefully. Retain a piece of dignity and take their place among the stars to shine down on the next pretty, sparkly thing.

And i love it as a closing track because it while her romantic life may be in turmoil, while she may have lost herself completely as her life imploded, this is one thing she found surprising clarity about. this has been the way of things for a century plus. she can wave away all that frivolity and finally have a real conversation with herself about something real and true, something only time could tell her. admit to herself that the new sparkle, that dazzle, I'm not chasing it anymore, it's futile and i don't need it as much as i used to. and anyway my destroyer is already here. but when she finally arrives that fateful day to break down my door, i'll be sure to leave it unlocked for her.

#it's just sooooooo gorgeous and stunning and i LOVE a quiet closer #a meditative closer #god AARON I LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU #i wanna cry but also hug her but also smile proudly at her like yeahhhhh #it's one of the only songs on her that sounds like it came from a 34 year old woman aldkfjsdlfkjsdkflj #which you can say that's mean but it's just true!#she's a mess in many ways but this is something she cannot run from

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lookingvisexually · 11 months

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➸ ᴏꜰ ᴡᴏᴜɴᴅꜱ ᴀɴᴅ ᴘᴀɪɴ-ʀᴇʟɪᴇꜰ

pairing: Vi x f!Reader

synopsis: just me thinking about cleaning up vi’s wounds and changing her dressings because she never does it for herself

wc: 430 words

warnings/notes: mostly fluff, mentions of injury, blood, allusions to smut, that's pretty much it, we're starting off slow

a/n: omg my first ever non-avatar piece and first ever writing for a female character i'm so nervous arghhh :((( anyway, i hope you enjoy this drabble, i can't get vi out of my head and i needed to write something for her asap. i will probably be starting to outline a series i have in mind soon, bc i don't think the hyperfixation's going anywhere anytime soon x enjoy besties x

“You’re crazy, you know that, right?”

You watch as Vi rolls her eyes at you, small smirk refusing to stay hidden. She can’t not smile, not when you look so good, nose scrunched in unrelenting focus as your hands find hers, gaze trailing over the fresh wounds that no amount of soiled wraps could ever hide or absorb. She can’t not raise one of the said hands to your cheeks, brushing the hair from your face and tucking it behind your ear before her index finger moves to trace your jawline, settling underneath your chin, raising it so you’d look in her eyes, bright blue and glimmering with desire and amusement.

“Have I ever told you you’re hot when you’re angry, cupcake?”

It was your turn to roll your eyes, smacking her lightly over her arm, biting harshly on the inside of your lip to stop you from smiling as her laugh filled the room, a sound which sounded more like music than a voice, more like a love song than just mere vibrations leaving her throat and hitting your eardrums.

“Only every time I’m angry.”

No matter how easy you find it to be content in her presence, a sigh, sad and worried, still finds a way past your lips. You slowly remove her once-pearly white wraps, cringing when she winces softly as soon as you unwrap the bandages over her cracked and bloodied knuckles, where the material clung tightly to her open wounds. Still, she didn’t complain, just closed her eyes and frowned, her cut eyebrows furrowing together, her canines digging holes in her plump, rosy lips.

“You need to be more careful, Vi.”

The antiseptic stings as it makes contact with her skin, and you find yourself trailing the fingers of your unoccupied hand over her bare legs, massaging her inner thigh with your thumb in a comforting gesture. Your eyes shoot up to meet hers when a small moan escapes her lips, and the look that meets you stills both your hands and the breath in your lungs, but makes your heart gallop in uneven, drunk steps, and all you want to do, all you can think to do is ki-.

"Don't stop, cupcake. This is helping me heal."

Your need for her, that has never diminished through time, but only increased with the intimacy that drove you closer together each day, was enough so that you resumed your ministrations, finding your hand inching upwards, until it found a slightly damp spot on her black, cotton panties.

"Well, whatever I can do to help you heal, my Violet."

#arcane #arcane vi #arcane vi x reader #arcane violet #vi smut #vi drabble #vi arcane #violet arcane #violet x reader #vi fluff #league of legends #vi x you #vi x y/n

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messedupfan · 11 months

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Chapter 5

Summary: Reader and Wanda hang out together with some of their friends and get to know each other a bit better.

A/N: So sorry for the late chapter but this thing is almost 7k words and it was very difficult to find a stopping point. Chapter 6 is most likely going to be late as well, hopefully I can get back to my schedule. Thank you all for your patience and for reading. I truly appreciate all of you! Enjoy!

Masterlist | All Chapters | All Stories Taglist

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spending a week in the woods, camping with Rachel, has been a tradition since she could walk. Jean only participated in the first two. After the divorce you weren't sure you wanted to keep the tradition but Jean made a few good points on why you should continue it. Now, years later, it's the best way that you get to bond with Rachel beyond the distracting devices and all of her shows and music. You do your best to keep up with all of it but she is constantly changing. You encourage it, of course. But it's hard to feel connected with your daughter. Except on these trips.

You rent the same spot every year. The two of you build the tent together and make it cozy inside. Then you set up the fire pit and she finds the best spots for the chairs. The two of you make food together over the fire. Tell jokes and scary stories. Remain completely unplugged for the entire trip. At night she snuggles close and you cherish the way she holds you tight because you know there will be a day a few years from now when she won't. She'll be upset with you because you'll be upset with her. Things will get tough, as they do with growing up, and you won't get as many hugs as you do now. And she'll continue to grow up and find her own way in life and her snuggles and these camping trips will be nothing but a distant memory.

Between meals the two of you make up games, talk to each other, and you teach her what you can think of at the moment. The two of you swim in the lake nearby and have fun splashing each other. A dog runs up to her when she’s eating her food and you already know that she's going to start asking for a dog. Luckily, you're able to convince her that she's still too young for one.

All too soon, it's Friday morning and the two of you are packing up the campsite. It's sad putting away the fun week but it's what has to be done. Once your truck is packed up, you hit the road and she's finally able to use her phone again. The entire drive home she is blasting her favorite songs and singing at the top of her lungs. Once you're back in town you're reminded of your plans and at a stop light you message Wanda to see if she's still up for drinks. You don't get a reply until you're pulling up to your apartment building.

Too nervous to check, you unload the car and get Rachel comfortable before you check your messages. I’ll see you at seven? Your shoulders drop from the relief. You call your sister, Kate, and ask if she can babysit for a couple of hours.

“Oh… does someone finally have a date?” She inquires and it makes you roll your eyes.

“No, I'm just grabbing drinks with some friends,” you clarify.

“You’re so boring,” she groans. ��Alright, I'll babysit. I don't mind spending some one on one with my favorite niece!”

“She’s your only niece,” you laugh at her enthusiasm.

“Exactly,” she says. “I’d have other favorite nieces, maybe even nephews, but no. You refuse to make anymore.”

“Gross, you do realize that you're upset with me for not getting laid, right?” The line goes quiet and you wonder if she's even there anymore. “Hello? Kate?”

“I’m here, I just had to go scrub my brain with bleach to remove the last few minutes from my memory.” She says nonchalant, as if that was the most normal thing to do. “Anyway, I'll be there in a few. You better leave me some money for food.”

“Of course, I'll see you in a bit. Thank you so much,” you say your goodbyes and hang up. You walk to Rachel’s room and knock on her door and enter once she says you can. “Hey kiddo, aunt Kate is coming over to watch you for a bit. I have something… I mean I will be… uh, I have to do something.” You cringe at how you’re fumbling telling her that you’re going out. Normally, to avoid this, you would plan to do something on a night you don’t have her. But you only have yourself to blame for this.

“Okay, have fun,” she says as she scrolls through her phone.

“Okay,” you almost want to laugh at how easy that was. “Okay,” you repeat yourself. “I’m going to shower so can you let your aunt in if she gets her before I’m out?”

Rachel nods, “Yeah no prob, now go! You don’t want to smell gross for your date.”

“It’s not a date,” you clarify and Rachel mutters something to herself that you can’t decipher but decide you don’t want to know anyway. “Please don't ever grow up,” you say with a smile and she looks up at you with big eyes like her mother.

“I have to someday,” she says seriously and it crushes something in you. As a parent, that is possibly the best and worst response to ever hear. “Now go, please,” she says with a small wave of her hand.

You finally leave her room, closing the door to the point that it's left to a crack. Just to mess with her a little. Then you head to the shower because you haven't had a proper one in several days. Your daughter is right, you do smell pretty gross. When you step out you hear your sister and Rachel laughing at something playing on the television. You finish getting dressed and when you walk out with a smile to greet the two girls they look up at you with horror.

“What?” You ask as you look at your t-shirt and jeans. Your usual attire.

“Is that what you're wearing?” Kate asks as she slowly eats the popcorn from the bowl between her and Rachel.

“Yeah, why? What's wrong with it?” You laugh at their judgmental eyes.

“Nothing, it's just so… you,” Kate replies with disgust.

“That’s a bad thing?”

“No,” she pauses as she continues to look you up and down. “It’s just not a good thing.”

You shake your head with a laugh, “Gee thanks, little sis. But it's nothing to get bent out of shape over. It's just drinks with some friends. I highly doubt Steve or Phil are going to have anything to say about my outfit.” You grab your jacket and put it on despite Kate's commentary about not wearing it. “What? I checked the weather. It might rain tonight.”

“I’m sorry, Rach. You’re not going to get another step-mom anytime soon,” Kate says.

Rachel is hardly paying attention to the conversation anymore so when her aunt speaks to her it takes a moment for her to respond. She shrugs, “It’s okay, Ms. Wanda likes their work uniform. She won’t mind this, I guess. I just thought she deserved better from them.”

“Oh, she has a name? And she knows Rachel?” Kate says in surprise, happy to be getting the good details now. “This must be serious.”

You pinch the bridge of your nose as you shake your head. “No, it’s not. I’m not dating anyone, Kate. Stop encouraging this kind of behavior.” You say, frustrated from having to repeat yourself constantly. You never liked this kind of teasing. It makes you uncomfortable and feel like you have something to prove. Besides, it's not fair to the other person who can't defend themselves. You grab your wallet, phone, and keys. “I don't have cash on me so I’ll send you the money for dinner. Thank you for watching her.” You say as you get a text from Wanda that she's already at the bar and sends you her location to double check that it's the right one. You send her a thumbs up. “I’ll be right around the corner so if there's any kind of emergency do not hesitate to call. Okay?”

“Of course,” Kate says. She hands Rachel the bowl of popcorn and gets off the couch. She stands in front of you and pulls you in for a hug. “I’m sorry, I know I tease you a lot but… I just want you to be happy.”

You hold your sister for a second and pull away and smile at her. “I am happy, kiddo. You don't need to be in a relationship to find happiness.”

She pats your check with a fake expression of pity. “Oh, you are so single. It's sad.”

You shake your head with a hearty laugh. “Whatever, weirdo.” You step away from her and go to join Rachel on the couch to give your daughter a hug. “I love you, nugget. I'll see you in the morning.”

“Morning? You’re going to be out all night?” She asks in surprise.

“No, sweetheart. You’ll be in bed by the time I come home.” You tell her with a soft laugh. “I’ll be back here tonight and will be making your favorite breakfast in the morning. Don’t worry.” You tap your finger to her nose and she scrunches her face with a giggle.

“Okay, have fun!” She gives you one last side hug, careful to not spill the bowl of popcorn.

Finally, you leave the apartment building and walk a few blocks down to your favorite bar. You used to work there when you turned twenty-one and learned many skills that you don’t use anymore unless it’s to try and impress someone you’re interested in. Especially since the owner has a soft spot for some of his former employees and will let you behind the bar to let you do a trick or two.

Walking inside The Hub you grow nervous because this will be the first time you and Wanda intentionally hang out together. You weren’t sure what you were supposed to talk about. What if there is nothing to talk about? How are you supposed to continue to go to her house and eat her food if she hates you after this? Steve is sitting at the bar talking with Phil. You met Steve when working here, he was the one who trained you in mixology.

Steve served in the military before you met him here. His usual story is that he only enlisted because he didn’t have a direction at eighteen and needed something to help him make good money early in life. The real story is that he spent the majority of his life training to be in the military. His entire family is in the military, it was all he knew. But once he was actually in battle he realized that life wasn’t for him. When he finished his six year commitment to the Marines, he didn’t renew his contract and hasn’t spoken to his family because of it. To say they didn’t approve would be an understatement.

“Rogers!” You greet him happily. You do a quick handshake and pull each other into a half hug. “It’s been a while, I’m glad you could make it out.” You sit next to him.

“I’ve been good, Peggy and I just got a place together,” he says with a grin as he takes a sip from his beer.

“That’s awesome man,” you congratulate him.

“Wow, it’s like I don’t exist,” Phil says as he sets a glass down in front of you and pours your favorite drink for you.

“I was going to get to you,” you laugh at his impatience. “How’s it been, Coulson? The place looks busy. I can’t even find the person I invited out.” You look around to find Wanda and her friend but have no luck from where you’re sitting.

“Yeah, business has been good,” he says with a frown as he throws his rag over his shoulder.

“Why does that sound like it's a bad thing for you?” Steve picks up on the bar owner's mood.

Phil leans on the bar and sighs. “My daughter is home for the summer and she needed a job but no one was willing to hire her so I thought what’s the worst that could happen? Turns out, it’s this.” He points to the crowd of guys that keep looking over at the bar to catch a glimpse of Phil’s daughter and you laugh as you realize that the ratio of males to females is not what you’re used to at this place.

“Where is she?” Steve asks and you nudge him as you shake your head. “What? I just want to see her. It’s been a while. Geez, I’m in a committed relationship, Y/n.”

Phil looks at Steve, “No one is seeing my daughter tonight. She isn’t scheduled to come in. I’ve made sure to give her all Friday’s to Sunday’s off.” He says proudly. You point out the room full of customers that don’t know and he laughs. “I’m not going to tell them that. I still need to keep this business afloat.” You nod with a smile as someone comes up from behind him and you recognize her from the photos that Phil has in his office. She is much more mature now than she is in those photos and you can see why she draws in a crowd. You clear your throat to get Phil’s attention and point her out to him. He spins around. “Daisy! I gave you the day off! Why are you here?”

“Calm down, Grant asked me to cover his shift. Besides, these are the busiest nights and I can make great tips,” she explains as she ties her apron on. Her and Phil have a quiet argument and you and Steve watch in amusement.

As guys come to crowd the bar you and Steve step away and you are reminded why you’re there in the first place. She is across the room, sitting in a booth in the corner chatting with her friend. Wanda looks up and the two of you make eye contact and you smile as you grab Steve’s attention. A soft blush warms her cheeks and she looks away from you. “There she is,” you tell him. Steve isn’t sure who you’re looking at so he lets you lead the way. You join her and her friend in the round booth. “I’m sorry it took so long to find you. This place isn’t usually this busy. Believe me, I used to make the worst tips here.”

Wanda laughs, “Okay, I’ll just have to take your word for it.” The two of you stare at each other for a moment. Not sure how to act around each other in this setting. She takes a drink from her cup and points to her friend. “This is my best friend, Carol Danvers. She’s in the Air Force.” You reach your hand across the table to introduce yourself, mentioning that it was an honor to meet her.

“An honor?” Steve scoffs in offense. “I served six years and you never said it was an honor to meet me.”

“That’s because you’re a nightmare,” you retort.

“I will have you know, I am a delight,” Steve defends himself. “I’m Steve Rogers by the way.” He offers his hand to Wanda first then Carol. “I know, it's an honor to meet me.” The girls laugh at his joke and you shake your head.

You turn to Wanda, “I’m sorry about him. Now you can see why I'm in search of some new friends.”

Wanda nods with her eyebrows raised, “I won't lie, I half expected you to bring Rachel's mom or my brother.” She admits in a laugh. “So, how'd the two of you meet?”

“Here,” you state as you sip your beverage. “We used to work together here.” You tip your glass to her friend who is engrossed in a conversation with Steve about basic training and sharing war stories. “How did the two of you meet?”

Wanda looks at Carol and then looks back at you. “We met at a party in high school,” she shrugs. “We didn't go to the same school, we just knew a few of the same people and became friends that way.”

“Oh that's cool. Which high school did you attend?” Wanda tells you about the high school she attended in another state. Then she goes into how she made her way out here. That she got into the university here and that's where she met Vision. How she got into architecture. She talks about how her parents weren’t ever married and that her father moved out here when she was in middle school. Which is part of what influenced her choice in university. Explains how Pietro followed along shortly after and worked under their father to prepare to take over the construction business for him.

Before she can continue on with her life story, Daisy comes over to the table with a notepad and a few menus. “So my dad is having a bitch fit and now I'm your personal server tonight. Here,” she tosses the menus onto the middle of the table. “I will be back every five minutes. Go.” She walks away and you laugh.

“The service is wonderful here,” Carol says sarcastically.

“Oh yeah, definitely employee of the month,” Wanda chimes in and the two women share a look before laughing at each other. Steve makes a funny face to you and you shrug because you have no clue what their inside joke is. Wanda grabs a menu and turns to you. “What would you recommend?”

“The loaded nachos and that’s it,” Steve cuts into the conversation.

You nod, “Yeah, that’s the only thing that doesn’t go in the toaster oven.”

“A toaster oven?” Wanda scoffs at the idea that an establishment would be allowed to get away with such a thing. But you nod, not showing any sign of the information being a joke. “Wow, okay. Loaded nachos then.”

“My goodness! There you two are!” A woman says as she gets close to the booth. “I have been to three bars looking for you guys. What are we doing here?” She slides in next to you on the booth and she gives you a flirty smile. “Oh, hello,” she winks at you then she leans on the table to talk directly to Wanda. “Now I know why you were ignoring my texts.” She returns her attention to you, “Tell me cutie, are you single?”

Wanda bursts out laughing at your uncomfortable expression as the strange woman strokes your arm. “Agatha, pump the brakes. This is the friend I told you about.”

Agatha stops trying to flirt with you and her eyes widen. “Oh! You’re them! Oh, honey why didn’t you say anything,” She swats your shoulder as she lets out a boisterous laugh. Agatha holds her hand out to you, “Agatha Harkness, pleasure to make your acquaintance.”

You accept her hand and shake it quickly before dropping it. “Nice to meet you as well, I’m Y/n.”

“Oh honey, I know who you are.” She directs her next words to Wanda. “You told me they were cute but you didn’t say they were hot!”

You look at Wanda with raised eyebrows and a teasing smirk. “Yeah, explain yourself, Wanda.”

Wanda opens and closes her mouth as she blushes. She knew she shouldn’t have used any sort of compliment as a descriptor. “I never said Y/n is cute.” She says as she points her finger at Agatha.

“Right, you didn’t say cute,” Agatha gives her a big wink.

“If it evens the score, Y/n told me that Wanda is very pretty,” Phil chimes in as he comes over with a tray of drinks. You had told him the kind of drink you wanted Wanda to try when you texted him earlier about being here. He said that he’d have them ready once you lasted more than ten minutes at the table with her. “If you ask me, Y/n is a little smitten.”

You shake your head, “It’s a good thing no one asked you then.” Steve makes an ooh sound, Carol laughs and Wanda appears a little impressed. “Thank you, Phil. I appreciate everything you do.” You rush out with an apologetic smile.

“You’re lucky I know you,” he says after he clears the tray. “Otherwise I’d pay Steve here to throw you out of here.”

“Oh please, you wouldn’t have to pay me.” Steve says as he grabs his glass, “I’d gladly do it for free.”

You nod your head, “Yup, these are the people I call my friends.”

The two men laugh and Daisy returns to the table. “Know what you want yet?” She asks with her notepad and pen ready.

“Two orders of loaded nachos please,” Steve says. “And a side order of your number,” he winks. Phil smacks the back of Steve’s head. “Ow! I was joking!”

“Behave, I won’t tell you twice,” Phil says unamused while the rest of you try to not laugh.

Steve salutes him, and then looks at Daisy. “I’m sorry, we’ll just have the nachos, please.”

The night continues like that, with humorous bits and teasing. Daisy returns every few minutes to check on the table and you order a couple rounds of shots that you want Wanda to try. You watch her to see if she likes them and when she makes a comment about how you know good drinks Steve points out that you have a home court advantage. To which Carol suggests a change in venue for an even playing field. You pay for the nachos and some of the drinks as Wanda refuses to let you cover the entire bill.

As you’re leaving The Hub, Daisy pulls you aside while everyone else walks out. You look at her confused and she writes her phone number on a paper in the notepad. She rips it out and slips it in your pocket with a sultry, “Call me.” You find the gesture to be a little funny but you don’t reject her right there. You figure that you’ll probably never use the number. Out of respect to her father and to her. You thank her and walk out the door to catch up with your group.

As they’re walking Wanda thinks of something to ask you and turns around only to find you missing from the group. She looks around and sees the interaction between you and Daisy through the window. Her eyes widen when she sees the girl stick her fingers in your front pocket. She feels a pang of jealousy but she isn’t sure that’s exactly what she is feeling. Maybe she was feeling off from all of the alcohol they were mixing. Why would she be jealous of you getting some girl's number? You seemed close with her father, so you could be receiving that number for any reason. And yet, she couldn’t shake the fact that seeing that intimate interaction bothered her. When you appear in front of her asking where the five of you are headed off to next, she has to snap herself out of her head. She shrugs because she was so focused on herself that she wasn’t paying attention to the rest of them.

Steve points to a place a few buildings down that the group of five make agree to and their way over. This place was more of a nightclub and there is a crazy long line to get inside which you were completely fine with. It gave you some time to talk with Wanda while waiting. She asked you a lot of questions this time, to get to learn more about you. All you talk about is how you’re from this city and go into the details of your family. How you didn’t like being a child of a bitter divorce and that you wanted better for your daughter. Then you talk about the different types of jobs you’ve had since you were fifteen. And you reveal how you’re working towards a business degree at the community college because you’ve always wanted to start your own handmade furniture business. Steve hypes up your work when he overhears that part of the conversation. You awkwardly thank him and next thing you know, the five of you are inside the club.

Once inside, you hate it immediately. The music is loud making it difficult to hear. It’s hot and the air is thin. It was hard to breathe in anything other than the aroma of alcohol and the smell of other people’s sweat. The place is full and cramped with sweaty bodies knocking into or grinding on each other which makes it hard to stick together. The flashing and rapidly moving lights are unpleasant and difficult to see through. Wanda grabs the collar of your shirt and roughly pulls you close so that you can hear her, “Can we leave?”

You nod without hesitation and turn around to tell the rest of them that it’s time to go but Carol, Agatha, and Steve have disappeared in the crowd. Wanda grabs onto your jacket with a tight grip so she doesn’t lose you while you search for the other three. You spot Agatha first, she is grinning as she dances provocatively with some random man. Next you spot Carol smiling at a woman as she leans against the bar. Lastly, you find Steve getting excited about spotting a group of guys he recognizes. It’s as if those three were in this place for longer than a few minutes and made themselves very comfortable in the environment.

You wrap your arm around Wanda’s waist to pull her close to talk, “I think we’re just going to have to wait outside for them.” Wanda nods and agrees telling you that she just wants to get out. You guide her through the many bodies that are colliding together as they dance to the booming music until the two of you are finally outside. “Oh my goodness I never thought I was going to breathe fresh air again!” You exaggerate once you’re free.

Wanda laughs, “Oh man I had no idea that’s what those were like! I don’t really see the appeal of a place like that!”

“We’re not drunk enough to enjoy it,” you shrug.

“I guess not,” Wanda looks at you. “Were you a person that could handle a club like that?”

You look back at the building and know that there are photos of you in that place somewhere online so there was no point in lying, it was a part of your life that you’re not proud of but a part no less. You nod, “Before my divorce, no way. I was a full-time parent and spouse. After my divorce however…” you drag out as you’re not sure how else to put it. Wanda nods in understanding but you feel like you still have to explain yourself. “Those first few weeks with no family to come home to were so lonely. I’m sure you know how it is. That quiet and isolation is so suffocating. So, yeah, I lost myself in a place like this.” You think back on that time and your reaction to going into that place back then is very different from how you reacted just now. “It’s been a while though and honestly, I cannot tell you how I did it. I don’t know how they’re doing it now!”

Wanda laughs in agreement, “I guess it’s fun for some people. A nightmare for others. And an escape for those who need it.”

“That’s an interesting observation,” you say. “Did you ever do stuff like this before having the boys?”

Wanda makes a face and looks back at the building then back to you, “No,” she drags the word out.“It always seemed like my worst nightmare and well… I was right.”

You nod, “Yeah, it doesn't seem like your kind of thing. Sorry about that, I probably should have shut this idea down.”

“Don't be, I could have said something, I mean we were waiting in line for like an hour. I was curious and now I'm not.” She says with a shrug. Wanda looks around the street and spots another bar with a calmer setting that also has an outdoor option. “Want to go there?” She points it out and you look it over a bit. If you get a spot close to the railing, Steve and the girls will be able to see the two of you from the club when they exit.

“Sure,” you offer your elbow for her to take. Wanda accepts it and makes a comment about chivalry and you laugh. The two of you cross the street and enter the establishment. It’s the type of place where you have to wait to be seated. So you tell the hostess two for outside and she grabs a couple menus and leads you to the empty corner table you had spotted from the club. You thank her and pull the chair out for Wanda, she looks at you funny. “What? You’re the one who said chivalry wasn’t dead. I have to continue to keep it alive.”

“That’s too bad,” she pulls the other chair out, “because now it’s my turn.” She pats the back of the chair, “Have a seat, Y/n.” You look at the gesture and happily accept it. Wanda walks around to claim her seat, “There, now we’re even.”

“Are we? I wasn’t keeping score,” you open the menu and start to look it over. You have only been here a couple of times and are still relatively unfamiliar with what they carry.

Wanda sits there and stares at you for a moment as read the menu. Not knowing the impact your words had on her. Most of her life has been an ongoing score board. If someone did something nice for her she made certain to do something even nicer, expecting them to do something in return. That’s just how relationships and friendships seemed to happen in her life. It wasn’t until halfway through her marriage with Vision that she realized that behavior wasn’t exclusive to good deeds. The amount of bad things they did to each other until the end of it when Vision won and continues to win… Cracks are starting to break through the rose colored lenses.

“Can I get you two anything to drink to start?” A handsome waiter with a winning smile asks, breaking Wanda out of her thoughts. You tell him that you’re going to have a glass of water and one of the local IPA’s. “And for the pretty lady?” The man doesn’t hide that he is checking her out and though Wanda is flattered by the attention, she wasn’t comfortable with it being from him.

“I’ll just have water,” she says shyly.

“Actually, cancel the IPA, I’ll just have the water,” you change your order. You don’t want to be drinking anymore alcohol if Wanda is stopping. “And I’ll add an order of the grilled bread and good olive oil.” You notice that the waiter isn’t taking his eyes off of Wanda and you notice how she seems to shrink under his gaze. “Would you like another appetizer, honey?” you clear your throat as you ask. Not comfortable with using the term of endearment. Wanda sits up as it sounds foreign from you but she notices that the waiter has finally stopped looking at her.

“Oh um, yeah, babe, you know what I like,” she tries her best to play along as she looks over the appetizers. “You’re so silly, you know that I like the-the… oh! White truffle garlic bread. That’s what I’ll have. For us,” she reaches across the table for your hand, “to share.” You bite your lips to keep from laughing as you nod and throw in a wink.

“Will that be all for now?” The man’s flirty demeanor has changed to a more professional one and you know that although the both of you are horrible at pretending, you’ve been able to pull it off.

“Yes, that’s all for now, thank you,” you say politely. He walks away and once he’s gone, you can’t help but laugh a little. “Oh I think we hurt his feelings.”

Wanda smiles and hums, “That’s what he gets for being creepy.” She removes her hand from yours. “Thank you for that, by the way.”

You wave her gratitude off, “It’s nothing. He should be focused on his job and not making his customers uncomfortable.”

Wanda crosses her arms and leans on the table, “Did you ever pick anyone up when you were a bartender?”

You laugh and shake your head, “No, I was still married when I started the job and then I was enjoying being out of a relationship when the divorce happened. I got to learn a lot about myself in that time.”

“Have you dated since your divorce?”

“I have been on a few dates. But I haven’t committed to a relationship since Jean,” you admit. “And it’s not because I still have feelings for her. Things between us ended for a reason and we’re still friends. That’s what we were always meant to be. But I haven’t met someone that I could introduce to her.”

Wanda makes a face, “What do you mean by that?”

“Well, when she started dating, she kind of made up a system to weed out the people she wasn’t sure if they would work out or not. If she didn’t think she could introduce them to me without a doubt that I would be comfortable with them being around Rachel, then she wouldn’t pursue it. Now she’s happily married to the woman of her dreams,” you elaborate.

“Huh,” Wanda says. The waiter returns with a pitcher of water to fill two glasses and the two plates of appetizers. When he disappears she continues the conversation. “I’ll probably be single forever then,” she says before she drinks her water.

You laugh as you chew on the bread, “Oh yeah, that system is not designed for people like Vision.”

Wanda shakes her head, “Nope. I’m sure he already has a file of every bad thing you’ve ever done prepared for drop off on Sunday.”

“Oh gosh, so you’re saying I shouldn’t have accepted that follow request from hotgurl69?” You say with a smirk.

Wanda stops chewing and stares at you with uncertainty, “You’re joking.”

“No, I’m not,” you grin as you pull out your phone to show her the obviously fake account that followed you during the week. It had a couple of posts of an objectively attractive woman but not someone that is your type. You hand it to Wanda and she shakes her head in disbelief as she looks it over. “I didn’t actually allow the account to follow me but oh that was something to see when I got back.”

“He is a nutjob,” Wanda says under her breath. She blocks the account just for her sanity. “I am so sorry about that,” she returns your phone to you. “That’s ridiculous, he is such a child.”

“There you guys are!” Carol says with a girl under her arm. “These are my friends. That’s Wanda and that’s… Wait. What’s your name again?” She points to you and you smile as you introduce yourself to the girl.

“Hi, I’m Maria Rambeau,” she says with a grin. “It’s nice to meet you guys!”

“Likewise,” Wanda smiles.

“We’re about to head out, I just thought I’d tell you so you didn’t assume the worst. Also, Agatha went home with some Ralph guy. I don’t know. But have fun,” Carol waves as she walks away fast so that Wanda can’t convince her to stay. You and Wanda laugh as the group has gone their separate ways for the night.

You look at your phone to send a message, “I should probably check on Steve and oh! His girlfriend had an emergency and he went home.” You close the phone and put it in your pocket. “I guess it’s just you and me, that is unless you’re ready to go home.”

Wanda looks at the half eaten bread on the table, then to the busy street full of people walking by and businesses that are alive, and then at you. Smiling at her with kind eyes that make her feel special. Eyes that make her nervous in the best possible ways. “No, I’m okay to stay a little longer,” is what she wants to say. But she isn’t sure what would happen if she did stay. How would the night end with just the two of you past this point? Would the two of you go on a stroll and continue to talk? Will there be a moment where the two of you get swept up by some romantic setting and she does something stupid like kiss you? She doesn’t want to risk this growing friendship for something so silly. Besides, you and her brother will be at her house tomorrow fixing her wall. She has already looked foolish in front of you plenty of times in the few weeks that you’ve known each other. She doesn’t need to add to that list tonight.

“Actually, I am a bit tired. Knowing Pietro, I’ll be waking up at six in the morning to let him in,” Wanda explains. “This was really nice, thank you for inviting me out. I haven’t had the courage to do something like this in a while. We should do it again sometime.”

“Yeah, and hopefully something that keeps everyone interested and engaged,” you reply. “I’ll cover the bill, we don’t want to give prince charming over there any reason to make some move on you because I can’t pay for your meal,” you say as you pull out your card.

“Ah well, it’s only appetizers,” she remarks. “If I were him, I’d probably say something about the lack of a three course meal.”

“Oh, no worries,” you say as you wave the waiter over. “I’m two steps ahead of you.” The waiter approaches and you ask for the bill. He makes a face stating that you’ve only ordered appetizers. “Yeah, we got a call from the sitter,” you start and glance at Wanda to see her start to smile. “Six kids is a lot to handle for one person. We rarely ever get to have an uninterrupted evening like this,” you lie easily and Wanda tries to hide her amusement.

“Yeah,” she adds with a disappointed sigh, “And can you believe we’re expecting seven and eight?” She reaches across the table again for your hand and squeezes it with excitement.

The waiter's eyes widen, “Wow uh, congratulations! You could never tell. Since this was a celebration, you know what, the meal is on the house.” You are surprised and insist on paying but he clears the table and allows you and Wanda to leave without paying.

The two of you walk to the end of the street where you’re headed in opposite directions. “My apartment is that way,” you point to the building you’ve called home for the past year and a half. Wanda nods as she makes a comment about the building looking nice. Then she turns and points to the parking garage where she parked her car. “I will see you tomorrow then,” you say awkwardly, not really sure how to end the night.

“Tomorrow,” she repeats, “Goodnight, Y/n.” Wanda walks away and you head home after bidding her a goodnight as well.

When you walk in, the place is quiet other than the soft volume of the television that Kate is watching. “So? How’d it go?” she asks in a whisper.

You shrug as you remove your jacket, “It was fun. Her friends ended up finding people to go home with and Steve had to head back to Peggy. Wanda and I got to spend some time alone and it was nice. Plus, do you remember Daisy? Phil’s daughter?” You are sitting next to your sister on the couch now. Kate nods as the name rings a bell. “Well she’s home from school and she gave me her number.”

“Oh, she has had a crush on you forever,” Kate admits.

You make a face, “Really?” You don’t want to believe your sister, especially not since she is constantly making comments on your lack of a love life. But it does explain why she made the move on you when you hadn’t shown any interest in her all night. “Oh well, I’m not going to call her anyway.”

“Why not? Things go well with Wanda?” She tries to see if you’ll admit that there is anything more than friendship between you and Wanda and you roll your eyes at her attempt.

“You’re insufferable, you know?” Kate shrugs and asks again why you’re not going to use Daisy’s number. “One, it’s none of your business and two she’s Phil’s daughter. That’s weird, I consider him a friend. I can’t just date his little girl without him knowing. Then I can’t end things with her if he does. It’s way too complicated.”

“Is it? Or are you making it complicated?” Kate challenges and not having the energy to even try to argue with her, you get off the couch.

“I’m going to bed. You know how to use the pull out,” you walk to your room. “Goodnight,” you call out to her behind you.

Chapter 6

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#wanda maximoff #fanfiction #wanda maximoff imagine #wanda x you #wanda fanfic #wanda x reader #wanda x y/n #wanda maximoff au #wanda maximoff x you #wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maximoff x gender neutral reader #carol danvers #steve rogers #daisy johnson #phil coulson #maria rambeau #kate bishop

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thatscarletflycatcher · 3 months

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Sense and Sensibility (2024, Hallmark) a review

I had expectations for this movie. They were not surpassed. It didn't perform below them either.

Spoilers under the cut.

So, this is a short movie (1.24hr long) a tv movie, a hallmark movie. You must keep that in mind as a frame of reference for what I'm about to say. You cannot really compare this with theatrical movies on equal footing.

Where to start. Costumes and sets. It is Bridgerton's world and we live in it. Everything is VERY colorful and shiny and not very real looking; that was to be expected. I think that sort of semi-fantasy aspect didn't hurt at all, and it was consistent. If you are not going to stick to the time period, at least go ham and show me something really interesting. I'm looking at you, Netflix Persuasion. There are some dresses that are pretty, and some others that... aren't. Considering that apparently the costume designer had to make something like 60 pieces in a month, it's kind of impressive that it came out as it did.

One funny bit, though, in this respect, is that they complain about how small the cottage is like some actual estate houses aren't the same size IRL XD Allenham we only get to see from afar, and it is rather disappointing.

Music: nothing to write home about, to be expected. Yes, we got one of those Vitamin String Quartet modern-song-played-by-strings. IDK. They were a bit dorky in their heyday, I don't know why they are so sought after in these pieces lately. I digress.

The acting. Deborah Ayorinde was a really good Elinor. She definitely deserved better writing and direction. The rest of the cast was good enough; I feel some roles really benefited from their characters being a bit hammy already in the source material (Lucy, Mrs Jennings, Anne, Fanny, Robert), others were really struggling because of being given very poor dialogue (Mrs Dashwood), and others were just... not good (Willoughby and Brandon, sadly). Edward was... a very special case. I can only describe it as the actor having two expressions: one, an attempt at reaching Hugh Grant's adorkableness AND Dan Stevens' ease at the same time, and two [SCREAMING INTERNALLY], but I guess those two were indeed enough to make it work just fine!

Which leads me to the writing. We all knew this adaptation was going to live or die in the writing, and most likely die.

The thing is that most of it is written around repeating 95' and 08's greatest hits, while attempting to compress the narrative into an hour and a half. And that goes as well as you can expect it to. Some scenes are painfully rushed -Brandon's backstory was extremely awkward to get through- some things are over before you have any time to assess their real weight -Marianne's illness, and many others end up being... incongruous.

Let me stop a little on those. The movie keeps Margaret, and gives her the whole play acting as a pirate with Edward from 95', but then removes the only real plot relevant thing she does in the book. So why keep the character at all? (Willoughby asks for Marianne's handkerchief in exchange for Queen Maab, instead of cutting a lock of her hair).

Because 2008 makes Brandon suspicious of Willoughby from the get go, this one makes it so that they know each other and implies that Brandon knows dirt on Willoughby, but then plays the rest of the story straight, which makes it... pretty inconsistent.

Speaking of Brandon, we have reached adaptation #5 that cuts out the fact that he tried to elope with Eliza sr. This time the backstory is that his father promised to let him marry Eliza if he proved himself as a soldier, but when he came back, he found his father has kicked her out of the house. Yeah, that was utter nonsense.

The adaptation makes a clumsy attempt at including the dinner at Mrs Ferrars... but Brandon isn't there to see Marianne defend Elinor.

We needed to have a "Brandon rescues Marianne in the rain" scene, but in this case, she's not faint or anything, he just grabs her because she's sad XD

And the list goes on and on and on. It was to be expected that the shadow of both 95 and 08 would be large over this one, but it truly is to the point that the references and contrivances are almost constant. Which is a pity because I think most of the original choices were interesting.

For example, Marianne twists her ankle running after Margaret, to try and stop her from asking something embarrassing, which is a good choice in terms of showing that Marianne is passionate, but she has more sense than Margaret.

On his deathbed, Mr Dashwood makes Elinor promise that she will take care of her mom and sisters and keep the family together. That added pressure on Elinor works really well in the context of the adaptation, and ads a new layer of interest.

John Dashwood is written mostly as a hapless but not malicious idiot. This is similar to what From Prada to Nada did (though there it made more sense because of the father having two families simultaneously), but I'm not sure where was that going. They did cut the Palmers, so I suppose the choice was so that they could go to Norland instead on their way to Barton (it is never established that Norland is so far away as it is in the book, so I guess one could give it a pass), but in that case, I feel the most cost effective shortcut is... have them go to Barton? Because we do get to see Barton (Marianne goes alone with Brandon to see it close to the end, and they get engaged before Edward returns, don't think much about it, manners and such are... for this movie... loose guidelines. But it isn't super offensive most of the time).

Anne Steele is decent fun as she's supposed to be, but Lucy really suffers the flattening. The mastermind has been flanderized into just a mean girl, and that's a pity.

Oh, Edward is sassy at times! And the sassy jokes land! I have to say it is not my preferred way of doing the character, but he does show some sass at the end of the novel, so, you know, I'll allow it I suppose XD

Edward's return and proposal started pretty good, but it overstayed its welcome. I cannot emphasize enough that, when writing this kind of proposal, you must avoid the word love if you can, and if you must use it, use it once, and with great reluctance.

The movie chooses to dedicate quite a time to the reveal of Edward and Lucy's relationship, and it's honestly... decent? For a scene made out of whole cloth it stands on its own feet reasonably well. But there's no Fanny freakout. This is probably the most shocking plot twist in the adaptation. This very on-the-nose Hallmark adaptation decided to cut the Fanny freakout of all things. Impressive restraint.

One thing, however, that was sadly cut out was Elinor and Marianne's conversation about Willoughby at Barton. It is instead replaced by an unsubtle comparison between Willoughby and Edward, and an exchange between Brandon and Marianne. It is one of the several points where the storytelling relies on previous knowledge of the work.

These are my main, disordered thoughts. I leave you with this choice from the ending, that I cannot form a thought about:

At Elinor and Edward's wedding, on the first pew are in attendance, from center to side: Mrs Dashwood, Margaret, Marianne, colonel Brandon... and Eliza Williams with her baby in her arms.

As a summary, I'd say Elinor and Edward's story was good enough, the relationship between the sisters was sweet, there were some odd choices, some interesting choices, and overall the writing was severely downgraded by attempting so much to stick to the choices of previous famous adaptations.

#Jane Austen #Sense and Sensibility #Sense and Sensibility Hallmark #Sense and Sensibility 2024

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imholtorf · 3 months

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JD tells Branch about their parents

During a camping trip as Branch asked John Dory about their parents that John Dory had waited for years.

_____________________________________

John Dory is sitting on a log as he is looking at book which is a family photo album. He looks at the photos of him and his brothers, and keeps turning the page every time until he stops at one with a photo of him, his brothers, and two trolls. The male troll had light cyan skin, John Dory's teal hair, and yellow eyes. The female troll had cyan skin, Branch's blue hair, and blue eyes.

The troll couple were his parents, Rowan Basil and Rose Willow. They were everything to him and his brothers, John Dory sadly sighs as he misses them. He hears a twig snap as he turns his attention to the source and saw his brothers, Poppy, and Viva "Hi, JD" Viva said "Are you alright, John Dory?" Bruce asked.

"I'm fine, I'm just...looking at our family photos" John Dory replied as his brothers come to look at photos and Branch's eyes widen at the sight of the troll couple "Is that...Mom and Dad?" he asked "Yes, it is" Clay replied as Poppy and Viva joined them. "Your parents look familiar as if I've seen them before" Viva said.

"Our mother, Rose Willow is friends with Queen Sunny, Poppy and Viva's mother. And our father, Rowan Basil is King Peppy's right-hand troll" John Dory explained "Now, I remember: Rose Willow was my babysitter when Mom and Dad go off on a date or something" Viva explained.

Branch glances at a photo of his parents, brothers, and him as an egg then something struck him "Hey, John Dory...I have a question that I wanted to be answered for all these years...What happened to Mom and Dad?" Branch asked. John Dory became hesitant before replying "When it was last time you asked that question?"

"To Grandma when I was little and she told me that to wait until I'm older" Branch said "Well, it's a good thing, she did because you were too young to understand what happened to Mom and Dad" Bruce added. As John Dory began "Years ago, when you were just a baby, just six months old..."

(Flashback)

Young John Dory was practicing his band song and choreography as he is unaware of a bergen approaching "I was so busy with by practice, I didn't hear my parents trying to warn me" John Dory said as Rowan and Rose Willow saw the bergen approaching their oldest son "John Dory! Watch out!" Rowan shouted as he and his wife rushed towards him, but the young JD didn't listen to him and the bergen is getting closer "Watch out, son!" Rose Willow shouted.

John Dory turns around as he saw his parents then the bergen as was about to grab him until his father shoved him out of the way as he and his wife were grabbed instead "Mom! Dad!" young JD shouted as he extends his hair for his parents to grab on as they did.

"Hold on, I got you" young JD said "John Dory..." Rose Willow said "Don't worry, I'll get you out!" young John Dory exclaimed "John Dory" Rowan said "What?" young JD replied "Just let go" Rowan said. "What? But, I need you guys, so do my brothers, and so does Branch" young JD protested "Your grandma will take care of you and your brothers" Rowan replied.

"John Dory...take of your brothers, do you promise?" Rose Willow asked as the young John Dory is bursting tears "I promise" he replied "Here's something to remember me" Rowan said as he removes his face goggles and tossed it to John Dory as he catches it "Tell your brothers that we love them so much" Rose Willow said "I will" young JD said as his parents let go of his hair. John Dory watches the bergen walk away with his parents as he glances his father's face goggles then he began walk back to the pod.

At the pod...

John Dory arrived at the pod as Grandma Rosiepuff and his brothers saw him, they were happy to see him until they saw his sad expression "What's wrong?" Grandma Rosiepuff asked "Are those Dad's goggles?" Spruce asked "Where's Mom and Dad?" Clay asked. John Dory answered as he explained what happened and his brothers became heartbroken as Grandma Rosiepuff comforts her grandsons despite being heartbroken.

The brothers were asleep in their beds as they are woke up by Branch's cry. John Dory got out of his bed and pulls Branch out of his crib "You miss Mom and Dad, don't you?" JD said as Branch continued crying which he takes it as a yes. "I miss them too...I wanted to save them" he explained as Branch stopped crying and listen to his oldest brother "but they told me take care of my brothers especially you" JD said as he bursts into tears and Branch placed his baby hands on JD's face then JD brings Branch closer to him and snuggles him "And I will keep their promise, Grandma and the four of you are what I have left, and I will make our parents proud, Baby Brother" JD said as Branch smiles and goes to sleep.

(Flashback ends)

"Then that day when Brozone broke up, I felt like that I had failed our parents' promise and blamed myself for all of this. A failure as a band leader, a brother, a son, and a grandson. For years, I've been living with that guilt, and I let Mom, and Dad, even Grandma down as all of this is my fault" John Dory explained as he bursts into tears and sniffs then wiped his tears away. His three younger brothers comfort him as Branch stood there in shock from everything that John Dory told him before replying.

"I can relate to that, John Dory" he said as everyone looked at him and Poppy knew what Branch is going to say "I know what is like to lose someone you love and blame yourself for this...When I was a little kid, I was in the song, I didn't hear my grandma trying to warn me. She saved me from being taken away from the bergen chef and gets taken instead. I was heartbroken when she was took away that I lost my true colors and became gray. For 20 years, I lived with trauma and believing it was my fault for Grandma's death" Branch explained as he wipes his tears.

His brothers were surprised by this, Branch had already told them what happened to her, but they didn't knew he was responsible for her death. John Dory placed his hand on Branch's shoulder "No it's not...It's not your fault grandma died" he said as Branch listens to John Dory "Grandma sacrificed herself to save you so you can live. And, I now realized that our parents' death is not my fault either, they sacrificed themselves so I can live too, if weren't for them you and I wouldn't be here today" he explained as Branch smiles then hugs John Dory and John Dory is touched by this gesture as he hugs him back then Bruce, Clay, and Floyd joined in.

Poppy and Viva were bursting into tears and trying to hold their sobbing "This is the most beautiful family moment, I've ever seen" Poppy said "Me too" Viva added. "Let's take a photo to remember this" Bruce suggested as everyone gather around to get ready for photo. Viva readies the camera then she quickly runs to the group as the camera took their photo.

John Dory steps out of the group and approaches the camera, the photo prints out as he pulls it out to examine it "Is it good?" Viva asked as John Dory gave her a thumbs-up "It's perfect" he replied.

As he looks at the description of the photo: he, Branch, and Poppy were sitting on the ground. Viva, Clay, Bruce, and Floyd were behind them. The photo reminds him of another like this, he picks up the family album and founds the photo he is looking for. It was him, his brothers, and his parents.

He, his mom, and Bruce/Spruce were on the floor. Clay, Floyd, and his dad were sitting on the couch as he was holding Branch. "I'm made you very proud, Mom and Dad, and we are now looking out for each other, I wished you met Bruce's kids, you would be more than excited to become grandparents" John Dory said.

Rowan Basil and Rose Willow (c) @rootsbe4branches-trolls

#trolls #trolls 3 #trolls branch #trolls poppy #john dory #spruce #trolls clay #trolls floyd #trolls viva

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gartenofbanny · 9 months

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So I watched Helluva Boss S2E6 "Oops" and let me tell you, it's better than Unhappy Campers, but it's also pretty mediocre too. So let's start off with the things I did like

Pros

Fizzarolli and Asmodeus's relationship

Fizzarolli and Ozzie's relationship is pretty adorable to look at, unlike Stolas and Blitzo's. They actually bounce off each other pretty well and are actually cute. Dick jokes aside.

I also like how Fizzarolli is sort of an advisor to Asmodeus's business related things, telling him what he needs to do for the day, and I also like how he tries to hide how other demons are starting to question whether or not their relationship is entirely lustful or actually romantic.

Asmodeus is very protective of Fizzarolli and respects whatever decision he makes. This is what Stolitz wants to be lmao.

Anyway, that's really the only thing I liked about this episode, now onto what I don't like

Cons

The intelligence of the characters

Most of the characters shown on screen are just dumb for the sake of moving the plot along.

Fizzarolli says he won't raise attention but then decides to raise attention in the Greed Ring where there are theives, bank robbers, and mob bosses.

Asmodeus, despite being one of the Seven Princes of Hell doesn't want to read a fucking contract. I get that he's impatient, but he's one of the Seven Princes and he's had to sign a contract AT LEAST ONCE in his centuries of living.

Striker and Crimson are just..they get distracted in a song where Fizzarolli is intentionally distracting them. I know Crimson is dumb as hell, but Striker and the rest of Crimson's mob? How am I supposed to take these antagonists seriously when they're stupid as hell?

Stolas

Stolas really had no reason being here since why isn't he in the hospital recovering from his injuries? How fast can demons regenerate if it has only been a week since Western Energy? That just removes even more tension even more for when certain characters take injuries because they can just heal from them at most a week later.

Stolas serves ZERO purpose to the plot. He barely does anything throughout this episode. Instead, he just gets all giddy at the sight of a stack of papers. He also says "get fucked little one" and I'm over here like YOU DID NOTHING SHUT UP.

In my opinion, they should've just let Asmodeus answer the phone call alone and read through the contract off-screen. Or have Asmodeus kill the lawyer and search for Fizzarolli while wandering around the Greed Ring.

The entire lawyer scene was pointless anyway because Asmodeus killed the lawyer in the end.

The Backstory

The backstory between Fizzarolli and Blitzo was...eh. I didn't really feel anything while watching the backstory because it was pretty predictable. While I was surprised that Blitzo admits that it was his fault (because when's the last time Blitzo took accountability)

I just could not feel sad for the life of me. And then, when Blitzo tries explaining, he's just interrupted. I'll get to the tonal shift of this episode later, but Blitzo says, "You have no idea what I lost in that fire". So Blitzo's mom died, and I'm wondering was Blitzo even aware that Fizzarolli was alive or not?

Because in Fizzarolli's perspective, Blitzo did see him but just ignored him. Not to mention, Blitzo somehow didn't acknowledge the fire when he bumped into Wally Wackford.

I'm damn sure Wally Wackford was screaming. Even then, Blitzo should've heard the flames go off, Blitzo should've seen the light of the fire in his peripheral vision, but he doesn't acknowledge it.

Blitzo's mom

Yeah, I'm counting this as a con. I don't feel bad that Tilla died because WE DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT HER. She's the same as Moxxie's mom but with a name.

Are the mothers of male characters just supposed to fucking die? At least we got to see Moxxie's mom on screen. We never even saw Tilla in the first place aside from some fucking portraits.

Is this supposed to make me feel bad for Blitzo because he caused the fire, and I'm pretty sure Fizzarolli also had a good relationship with her, yet we never see his reaction to the death of Tilla either. Just Blitzo's and, to an extent, Barbie Wire's. Speaking of

Barbie Wire

Yeah, Barbie Wire wasn't really mentioned at all throughout this entire episode, not even in the flashback.

In the storyboard she did appear, but in the final version she just doesn't make an appearance for some reason. Vivziepop does not give a shit about their female characters

Fizzarolli forgiving Blitzo

Fizzarolli forgave Blitzo way too quickly in this episode. It doesn't make any sense that Fizzarolli forgave Blitzo, but Barbie Wire doesn't. Even though Barbie Wire has still been in contact with Blitzo.

Turns out Fizzarolli and Blitzo's hatred for each other was just a huge misunderstanding. Someone or something has prevented them from coming into contact with one another. They both keep saying, "But they told me" or "I never told them that" and who the hell is "they"? Just leaving out information for no reason at all.

Fizzarolli says, "It's hard to forgive you. It's been 15 years," but then he proceeds to forgive Blitzo near the end of the episode.

That's not how forgiveness works. Forgiveness takes time to go into effect it doesn't just happen when you hear a sob story.

Personally, I wouldn't have mind if FizArolli forgave Blitzo but not in the same episode where they're the main focused of an episode for the first time.

Convenient shit

Stuff just happens because it happens in this episode. Blitzo is at Greed because he wants breakfast and just so happens to meet Fizzarolli despite the fact that Crimson is still around.

Striker and Crimson coincidentally meet and are conveniently near Fizzarolli and Blitzo, allowing the two to get kidnapped.

A goon conveniently has anger issues and kills a large amount of his own crew allowing Blitzo and Fizz to escape

Striker and Fizzarolli are conveniently behind fucking gasoline WHY IS THERE PERFECTLY GOOD GASOLINE IN A DUMP?!

Fizzarolli's arms conveniently malfunction, so he can't escape the flames, so Blitzo has to save him.

It's just convenient stuff just so the plot can move along.

Tone issues

Can't be a Helluva Boss episode without tone issues. I don't feel like listing the examples because there are A LOT, but one major example I will put is Crimson blackmailing Asmodeus and at the end of it, one of his goons don't know how to hang up a phone or to stop a video.

This series can not have a serious scene if it saved its life.

Conclusion

I would comment on how Striker is just mischaracterized again through Blitzo calling him a supremacist or how the antagonists overall in this episode are dumb as hell. Or how this episode raises even more questions

But I believe those two deserve blogs by themselves. Anyway, thank you all for reading, and I hope you all have a nice day! ❤️

And I give this episode a 3.1/10

#helluva boss #vivziepop critical #helluva boss critical #helluva boss criticism #vivziepop criticism #vivziepop #helluva boss critique #helluva critical #vivienne medrano #hazbin hotel

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updownlately · 1 year

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can't stand (when you're not close to me)

absolutely cannot get this idea out of my head so i need to share it somehow. if you're confused on what this is, check this out :) song: notice me by role model

might not ever write this properly tbh

smidge of angst with fluff, just softness between the two characters

in my mind its an alessia fic (im just on an alessia arc don't mind me)

the whole thing really starts after you come back in after a night out with a bunch of friends

the group was huge, a mix of teammates and a few of everyone's personal friends just coming together to enjoy the start of summer

everyone was having fun, at least you were trying your best to make sure of that

alessia however, had been slightly quiet the whole night, not letting herself be as loose as she normally would

it concerned you, but you brushed it off after the first three times she told you she was fine

you tried to stick by her for a lot of the night but you eventually got swept away by friends, old and new

the night passes, you both don't interact much, not for your lack of trying, but it was just like the universe didn't want you beside each other. plus, even if you absolutely tried your hardest to be near the other girl, she was distant, no matter how close you guys sat

when it comes time to leave, alessia's quiet, not protesting like she normally would, adding to your worry

"you sure you're alright babe?"

a hum is all you get in response

when you make it back to your shared apartment, the walk back one of the quietest you've both ever had (and not in a good kind of way) she wordlessly puts her handbag to the side, removes her shoes and heads to your guys' bedroom, not waiting for you

you just stand there, sighing, locking the door behind you. you didn't realize it till now but her distancing herself took its toll on you

the whole night, all you wanted to do really was be by her, in her arms, kissing her, touching her in one way or another, anything really, just wanted her near you, yet she didn't want the same

it didn't help that she was dressed to the nines too, the black dress that she wore hugging her frame perfectly, her hair in loose waves, a personal favourite of yours, and makeup making her look ever so angelic, the world's most beautiful, ethereal human in your opinion.

all in all, all you really wanted was a nice night out with your friends and then a soft night in with your lover, someone who clearly couldn't stand to be near you right now, this night immediately losing its place as one of your favourites taking a deep breath to call yourself down, you follow her lead,

removing your shoes, locking up the rest of the house and heading to the bedroom

entering, you could hear the water of the shower running, sadness enveloping you just a little more

more often than not, practically an unspoken ritual of yours now, you both would get ready for bed with the other, showering the night out away together, just a small little tradition that charged both of you up, the intimacy of it all calming to you, strengthening

you wait for her to finish up, sitting on the edge of the bed, her appearing out of the bathroom practically ready for bed

catching her softly by her arm when she doesn't look at you, you ask "hey, are you sure we're okay? did i do something to upset you? cause if yeah, please tell me so i can fix it" you're practically begging, looking up at her, alessia barely meeting your eyes before darting them elsewhere

"we're fine. i'm just tired"

you knew that was bullshit. any time a woman, especially a girlfriend, said she was tired whilst she was ignoring you meant that you fucked up, one way or another. it was very much a no brainer. yet, in that moment you chose not to press it, knowing alessia and aware that it wouldn't end well if you prodded right now.

so instead you nodded, placing a tender kiss to the back of her hand before heading to the bathroom to get ready for bed yourself

what you didn't see on the way out was the unshed tears in alessia's eyes, how she stood frozen in her spot for a minute, the ghost of your lips on her hand taunting her

she didn't know how to tell you, but ever since the both of you had walked into the dinner venue and heads had turned, many of the gazes taking you in, your outfit and the air of confidence that surrounded you, (in my mind reader's wearing a suit or maybe just a button down with slacks, radiating an aura of power), alessia had been uneasy with the attention

it wasn't often that she doubted herself, rarely on the pitch or during trainings and even more seldomly when she was with you.

so she didn't know why, here in this moment, the assault of thoughts telling her she wasn't good enough for you was the only thing on her mind.

the repeated thoughts of how you could do better, how any of your other friends or the other girls at the dinner would look so much better on your arm instead of her were on the forefront of her mind throughout most of the dinner, only easing just slightly in the club due to the sheer loudness of the music playing.

she thought about telling you, aware that you wouldn't mock her for it like she feared, yet the fear itself of the possibility of you leaving her at how pathetic she was stopped her

instead, she willed for the thoughts to go away, waiting until they would pass before she came in contact with you, knowing you'd otherwise read her like a book (being in a relationship for two years would do that to a person). deciding that sleeping it off would be best, she had made a beeline for exactly that the second you had both entered the apartment.

she knew she was hurting you, you never one to hide your emotions from the blonde, but yet, in the this moment, fear with its hand wrapped around her throat, alessia didn't know what else to do but protect her heart (something a part of her knew you would do too, without a second of doubt)

however, her plans fall short the second you reenter the room, ready for bed, smaller frame being swallowed in a hoodie of hers

as you tuck yourself in onto your side of the bed, alessia facing away from you, the back of her head and torso the only things visible, you consider giving it one more try, going for a gentle approach this time

you roll onto your side, your front facing her back now, running a featherlike touch over her bicep, trailing down to her forearm before wrapping it around her waist

"please talk to me love. it's killing me seeing you like this...seeing you so far away from me, your sweet smile not on your face." its a hushed whisper, too afraid that if its just a decibel too loud the whole world would crash and burn

when seconds pass, turning into a minute, then almost nearing two, you're about to give up and just call it a night

right as you go to pick up your arm from where it laid across the striker, you feel the mattress move from body movement that most definitely wasn't your own

holding your breath, you wait

slowly but surely, alessia turns to face you, her head hung down, eyes not meeting your own

reaching out, you intertwine your hands with hers, your other hand coming to rest at her hip

"i'm sorry"

"less...don't be. just let me in yeah? what's going on in that pretty mind of yours?"

swallowing hard, her eyes flicked up to meet yours before coming back down, gaze fixed on your interlocked fingers

"i just-" taking a sigh, she reminded herself this was you. the same you that had stuck by her even after seeing her at her worst after losing so many important games. the same you that had always diligently taken care of her the few times she was sick. the same you that would always know how to take care of her on her worst days, magically always making the perfect dinner, running her baths, cuddling her until she couldn't help but smile. this was that you. you were that you. and you were safe. she knew that. she just had to believe it, had to trust in it.

"it's stupid"

"wanna let me be the judge of that? plus anything that's bothering you isn't stupid my love. in fact, if it's bothering you as much as this is, it's actually quite important to me. you're important to me"

closing her eyes, alessia inches closer towards you, foreheads nearly touching now.

"i can't help-... i can't help but think sometimes how you'd be better off with another girl. it's silly, i know. but like even today, when we walked into the restaurant, so so so many people turned to look at you, and before you say anything, yes they were looking at you, i saw their gazes scan you.

you couldn't help but smile at how well she knew. even with her eyes closed she was ready to cut off your imminent statement.

shoulders relaxing at your silence, recognizing your genuine intent to listen (mentally cursing herself for ever doubting your love for her) she continued.

"even at the dinner and then the club afterwards, you just looked so...i don't know...relaxed? with the other girls around you. and they weren't worried about you like i was. they weren't stuck in their own heads. they were just there. just pretty, holding the conversations well, making you and others laugh, not stuck in their own heads, questioning why you were with them, doubting yourself, and it just...i can't help but think, you'd be so much better off y'know..."

alessia trailed off, eyes still closed, the last sentence hanging heavily in the air

you took a deep breath in, shaking your head ever so slightly before pulling the taller girl into you.

"less, baby...i don't want any else but you." pausing to place a soft kiss on forehead, you continue. "all night, all i could think of was how gorgeous you looked y'know? the whole time...dinner, the club, even the walk home love, you didn't leave my mind. i couldn't wait to get home to be with you, just us two, in our apartment, our bedroom, together."

you could hear alessia hum at your pause, her eyes still not meeting yours, her heart still not believing you.

"i want you. just you. only you. i can't stand it when you're not close to me y'know. just having you near, hands intertwined, or maybe not, maybe you're just beside me, yet each time my hearts doing summersaults. hell sometimes i can't even manage to fathom how i got you to date me. you're perfect, and everything in between y'know."

it was as your last sentence trailed off that Alessia finally looked up, meeting your eyes for half a second before they fell on your lips.

giving her a nearly imperceptible nod, you let yourself lean in, meeting her halfway.

your grip on her waist tightened, alessia's own hands reaching out, grasping at your hips, tugging you closer to her, bodies now flush.

between gentle kisses, featherlike touches, and quiet whispers, sighs, and gasps, you let your actions speak.

chaste kiss after chaste kiss, you chased her lips each time she pulled away, not wanting to spend even a second an inch apart, not when she'd been so far from you all day.

it was when alessia pulled away, air likely finally an issue that you scanned her face. this time though, all you could see was apologetic eyes and a tired mind.

"i love you alessia. so fucking very much. and just know that you're the only person i ever wanna love. ever in my whole life. i want to love you forever."

and when you received your favourite soft smile in return, followed by a quiet murmur of 'i love you too, so much' against your lips, before another kiss is placed upon them, you know that this may not have been the best night of your life, but it was one of your favourites with the blonde. just the pair of you, cuddled up, loved up, relaxed, together.

you both knew that the intrusive thoughts hadn't left her mind, at least not yet, but you were going to make sure that eventually, no matter how long it took, you'd make sure that she knew she was the only one for you.

(a small part two to the initial idea, read if you want :) technically a continuation)

its why just before going to bed that exact night, you suggested having a date the next day. "just the two of us, you and me, lets spend the day together yeah?

and so when you wake up the next morning, you do so with the blonde's arms wrapped around your midsection, your back pressed tightly to her front, her face snuggled into your neck, slight puffs of her breath tickling your collarbones.

your guys' morning goes by quietly, just pure softness really

it starts of with you both just laying in a bed a bit longer, cuddling after you eventually wake up alessia (after you've taken the time to admire her and her little freckles, and the curve of her nose, and ran your finger over the gentle wrinkle lines that were beginning to form on her face ofc),

the pair of you brush your teeth together, you pulling silly faces and catching your lovers eyes in the mirror before you end up making a mess around the counter, you both giggling whilst cleaning up after your impromptu mr. bean impressions

after freshening up, the pair of you head downstairs, you starting the coffee pot while alessia hangs off your back like a koala, hunching over just a little so she can comfortable smush her forehead into the space between your shoulder blades

breakfast goes by without a hitch really, you both not leaving the other's side for more than a minute at any given moment, even going as far as eating at the island so you could pull two stools impossibly close together

its as you get both get dressed and alessia's asking you where you want to go out for the day, that you decide that now was the perfect time to set your small surprise into motion.

convincing the blonde to go to an outdoor shopping centre isn't hard at all, since she's smitten with you

what is difficult though, is hiding your intentions from her

so when you eventually lead her into the fifth jewelry store of the day alessia can tell something is up

and when she prods you on your intent, you can't help but shrug, wanting her to witness your idea for herself

so as you talk to the jeweller (you have a good feeling about this store having what you're looking for) you can feel alessia drape herself over your back once more. except this time, alessia sneakily slips her hands under your (technically her) hoodie, resting them on your stomach, skin only separated by the thin cotton t-shirt you had on under.

you do your best to try to finish telling the jeweller what you were looking for without stuttering too much, the warmth of her palms pressed flat against your midsection sending butterflies throughout your chest

as you chastise her quietly without turning around (not wanting her to see the smile on your face). "lessi you need to stop, they're going to end up asking us to leave otherwise" you pout

despite of your tone, you can feel her silently laugh into your neck, placing apologetic kisses along your nape

slapping her arm, you composed yourself just in time for the person you were talking to earlier to show up, a velvet box in her hands

taking the box from her hands, you gently opened it, revealing the small platinum chain, a small 'R' hanging off the middle.

tapping alessia's arm, you grab her attention, her head popping out from where it rested in the crook of your neck

"whatchu think?"

flipping over the charm, you felt alessia take in a sharp breath, her grip on you getting just a tad bit tighter

"i-... what? are you sure?"

you shrugged in response, a smile taking over your face.

"pretty sure yeah. i know what i want babe. it's you."

letting her finger run over the engraving on the back, alessia couldn't hold back her smile, in awe of the way you knew exactly how to make her feel better.

and as you go ahead and finalize the purchase, alessia offering to pay before you can even take out your wallet, you both have the biggest smiles on your face.

just before you walk out, you let her examine the 'alessia' written on the back

"can i put it on you?"

you nod eagerly, moving your hair out of the way.

you feel her fingers skim your nape before she sets the necklace perfectly across your collarbones, clasping it into place

finally walking out, ready to make your way home, you reach out intertwining your hands with hers

you knew you both would have your ups and downs, your love for each other being tested so often. but you also knew that if you had to walk through hell for anyone, with anyone, it would be the blonde beside you, the striker that had your heart.

letting your love envelope the quiet surrounding you both, you quietly made your way home, the silence comforting this time, a unsaid promise of support, of love, of forever.

lyrics this is based off of (not many btw, the idea came to me first, the song after but oddly enough so many lyrics fit perfectly with my idea):

"you're perfect, and everything in between"

"keep going, until they tell us to leave"

"let's dance when we're not supposed to be"

"can't stand when you're not close to me"

"damn, can't believe you notice me"

"now i'm angry, cause i'm fallin' in love"

"i'm mad, 'cause i used to hate all this stuff"

"and i won't let this go, never fell this far"

okay damn. i had to make multiple text blocks, i wrote that much holy shit. its 3k words of an unfinished idea...this is killing me.

i don't know if i'll ever write this one out properly, but i might maybe. we'll see. anyways, this was just a nice little idea/scene that played out in my head that i decided to continue and then eventually added the second little part bc i thought it would be cute (i'm sorry you cannot tell me alessia wouldn't absolutely lose her mind seeing you wear a necklace with her initials). hopefully the cuteness was retained as the ideas went from visuals in my head to actual text.

anyways, i hope y'all enjoyed and that this makes sense grammatically bc this was not at all proof read.

take care 🫶

#storylines #cs #cs(wynctm)#woso imagine #woso fanfics #alessia russo x reader #fluff #alessia russo imagine #my writing

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tillthelandslide · 10 months

Text

International Friendship Day - Matty Healy One Shot

I wrote this fic to celebrate today. P.s I did not proofread it.

She sits in a black leather spiny chair in her home studio, her legs are crossed underneath her, a light green electric guitar resting in her lap, her hands moving down the neck of it, fingers moving against the frets as she tries different chords out. A pair of black headphones sat on top of her head and she had moved the microphone in front of her so she could sing sitting down. She grunts when a certain chord doesn't sound the way she wants it to, nearly swearing when she can't figure it out.

Her doorbell (which she has ignored twice already) sounds again, the grating noise which she really must change, finds her ears again and she swears.

"For fuck sake" she stands from her chair, placing the guitar in it's holder, removing her headphones and walking to the front door.

"You will not give in will you... Probably just a freaking package... Just leave it next door" she mumbles to herself, gasping when she opens the door, revealing someone unexpected.

"Happy international friendship day love!" Matty says, his curls are loose on his head and he's sprouted a few more greys since the last time she saw him, of course she saw them on their daily face time calls but they seemed brighter in person. He holds red roses in one hand, a bottle of red wine in the other and her favourite snacks clasped in-between his fingers, somehow managing to not drop them. She feels kind of sad that he's holding so much, otherwise she would've launched herself towards him already.

"Thought you were in LA... Or New York or some shit" she says making him chuckle and shake his head.

"Nope. I'm here" he smirks at her and she crosses her arms at him, looking him up and down, needing to take him in after having not seen him in person for a few months.

"Well duh.... You're outside my flat"

"I'm outside your flat" he confirms with a nod of his head "going to let me in?" He asks, and she smiles, nods and steps aside. They walk to her kitchen where Matty places the items he's holding down, reminding himself to open her cabinet which holds her vases after properly saving hello.

He turns to face her and smiles widely, opening his arms widely. She runs into his arms, Matty hooking his hands underneath her bum and lifting her up, her legs close around his hips and she tucks her head into his neck.

"God I missed you..." He mumbles into her neck, squeezing her tightly.

"Can't believe you're here... Why are you here again?" She says, pulling back to look at him. He walks them until she's sitting on the counter, but he remains in-between her legs, holding her tightly to him by her waist as she holds his shoulders.

"It's national best friend day!" He says excitedly.

"You don't believe in that shit... You think it's just another occasion capitalists can exploit poor people into buying more shit" she says and he laughs.

"Hey I'm a changed man!"

"I heard... You're back on social media again..." He laughs at her, quickly saying a "we can talk about that later"

"Your neighbour text me saying you've been listening to my entire discography on repeat... Except it's only the sad songs... Which means two things. One: you're sad" he begins, shes scoffs at his words, mumbling a "good observation".

"And two: you miss me" he says proudly.

"God you're insufferable sometimes... Why am I friends with you again? Please remind me" he laughs again before pulling her into another hug.

"Shut up... You love me"

"When did you start talking to my neighbor?" She asks.

"Why? Jealous?" He gets a shove on the chest at that and he laughs.

"She asked for my number at your last party, said she needed it so she can text me when you get... Well like this" he explains.

"Hey I'm fine thank you very much!" She says, removing her hands from his shoulders and crossing them over her chest.

"Don't be like that" he says, uncrossing them for her and holding her hands in his.

"Tell me what's wrong..." He says, he stares into her eyes for two, maybe three seconds before she's breaking.

"Everything's wrong... I can't fucking write any songs, I'm failing as a musician, I haven't eaten a proper meal in like three days, I'm fucking tired" she begins listing, Matty makes a mental note to order them food.

"And I fucking missed you..." She finally admits.

"Love" he says, his eyes softening. His fingertips caress her cheek and her eyes flutter closed.

"I'm here now... And we can work on the song part... Come on I can tell you've been in your studio, show me what you've got so far" he says and she nods, smiling a kind of sad smile at him. He takes a step back, removing himself from her legs and helping her jump down from the counter.

They walk to the studio together and she shows Matty what she's been working on so far, he really likes it and helps her tweek a few bits, recommending different things he thinks would sound good. At some point Matty orders them food (without her knowing). Eventually they're both squished onto the one chair she has in the room. She's resting in his lap, scrunched up in a little ball and he's hand is smoothing down her back.

"So Twitter... Kinda made your fans feral with the return" she says, she had lifted his top up slightly, her fingertips now grazing his "we are kings tattoo".

"been keeping tabs on me love?" He says, his pointer finger and thumb hooking under her chin and gently pulling until she's looking at him.

"Said I missed you didn't I? Besides... When your best friend returns to social media without telling you... His fans are going to make you aware of it" she says, and he shakes his head, mumbling an "unbelievable".

"What have you heard then? I'll confirm or deny now" he says and she nods, thinking about things she's read.

"People think you're dating Taylor again... Or still dating her... I don't know" she shrugs.

"Well you know that was never true... Not true even now" he says and she nods again.

"good" he raises his eyebrows at that and she closes her mouth, hating that the word slipped out.

"Yeah? Happy I'm not dating her?" He asks and she pauses, thinking about her options. She knew she could deter the conversation in a different direction like she had for years, avoiding her feelings for her best friend, or she could finally, finally be brave and tell him the truth. What's the worse that could happen? This is Matty were talking about, her best friend, everyone around them knew how mad he was about her and she had an incline too, she was just too afraid it would change too much.

"Happy you're not dating full stop." She says and he pulls back slightly at that, raising his eyebrows, his grasp on her chin tightening slightly so she didn't move.

"Well that's a revelation I didn't think id be hearing today" he says smiling to himself, especially when she blushes.

"You've been my best friend how long? 7 years now?" He asks.

"8" she confirms and he nods.

"And it's taken you that long to admit your feelings for me?" He asks, chuckling.

"Hey! I didn't admit my feelings, just said I'm happy you're not dating" she says, being defensive as ever.

"Oh don't do that. Don't go back on your word" he says, gently tugging her forward more, grazing his lips against hers.

"Don't make this embarrassing for me" she says, eyes fluttering shut, trying to avoid his eye contact, not able to deal with his teasing.

"Love... Open your eyes... Come on look at me" he says and she eventually does as he says, meeting his soft eyes which sparkle with happiness.

"You've been my best friend for 8 years... And I've been wanting to kiss you since day one. Can I love?" He asks and she nods her head, closing her eyes again when he leans forward, closing the gap between them, his soft lips pressing lightly against hers.

She sighs at the first contact, feeling her hairs stand on end and her stomachs doing backflips. His lips press firmer against hers, hands moving down to her waist to pull her tighter against him. He begins moving his mouth against hers, taking her upper lip in-between his, running his tongue along the plumpness of it.

She pulls away, feeling slightly overwhelmed.

"I've been wanting to do that for years... Never wanted you to be just my best friend" he admits.

"I really did miss you" she says and he smiles.

"I missed you more... That was the real reason I came... Couldn't stand being away from you another day... The kiss was just a welcomed surprise..." He says, his words make her smile widely.

"I really do like you Matty... More than a friend too" she says, feeling like a school girl.

"Well I'd hope so... I just kissed you" he says, teasing her again, making her blush.

"I love seeing you blush" he says, thumb caressing her cheeks, feeling the warmth under his pad.

"Kiss me again then" she says and he does, pressing his lips firmly in hers. This one is faster, somehow more passionate than the last, years of passion and wanting and love being poured into the next person. He grunts and she gasps as their tongues meet, only pulling away when her doorbell sounds.

"Shit" he says against her mouth "foods here" he says and she pulls away fully.

"food?"

"you said you hadn't eaten properly in three days so I ordered your favourite" she smiles widely at him after his words, pushing another kiss to his lips.

"You're the best"

"What can I say? It is national best friend day" he says making her groan.

"Stop saying that" they both laugh together, eventually having to get up when the door bell rings again. They sit in her kitchen and devour the food he brought, catching up on everything the other missed, holding each other's hands and eating with the other.

"So..." He says as they finish eating "what now?" He asks.

"Well... I think it's safe to say I can't call you my best friend anymore" she admits.

"Yeah? Let me take you on a date then... A proper one" he says and she smiles.

"Id love that" she says and he leans forward to kiss her again.

"Not going to stop doing this though" he murmurs into her mouth, tugging her towards him when their tongues meet, until her legs are hooked over his and she's perched in his lap.

"Reckon we could do this thing a bit backwards?" She asks against his lips, not allowing them to stop the kiss.

"How so?"

"Reckon you can take me to my bedroom and THEN we can go on a date" she says and she's glad he catches on quick to what she's insuating.

"Absolutely" he says, picking her up with his mouth stick attached to hers and carrying her to her room, placing her down on the covers.

"this is the best friends day ever" he says making them both laugh.

"Shut up and show me what I've been missing out on" she says.

#the 1975 #the 1975 fanfic #matty healy #matty healy x reader #matty healy fluff #matty healy fan fic #matthew timothy healy #matthew healy #matty healy fanfic

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jennay · 9 months

Text

Ex-Husband (2)

Bitter

An: Mentions of child loss. Also I tried editing this so many times and it never got better. I just kept getting frustrated. I ran through it one more time before being ok with this one. I hope you guys enjoy it though and I’m sorry it’s sad!

Master list

You look at your reflection in the bathroom mirror, feeling self-loath. You remember Kieran's words: "Be yourself." But you don't want to be yourself. You want to erase your past and start over somewhere new. Somewhere where no one knows who you are or what you've done. Somewhere where you can lie and pretend to be a good person who never hurt anyone. Somewhere where you don't have to face the demons inside you.

You open the drawer, pull out the little bottle of your anxiety medication, and swallow two tiny pills.

Memories flood your mind as you walk down the hallway. You thought taking down the picture would've helped remove the pain, but it didn't. Now, you stare at empty walls, plagued by the traces of what used to be there. The faded outlines of frames and nails mock you with their emptiness. You stop at the closed bedroom and stare at it, feeling a knot in your throat. You don't know if you can ever enter it again. You don't know if you can face the reminders of what you lost.

You urge yourself to keep walking, and when you reach the living room, you snatch your purse and anything else you might need. You secure your doors and step outside.

Of course, it's raining as if today wasn't hard enough already. You pull your hood over your head and sprint to your car, swiftly unlocking it and tossing your stuff on the passenger's seat.

You start the engine, fastening the seatbelt with extra care. You've seen the consequences of a loose buckle and how a split second can change everything. You still feel the guilt gnawing at your chest.

You rest your head on the steering wheel and let out a shaky breath. “Damn it.” You curse as tears cloud your vision. You lean back and wipe them away. You have to keep it together.

Your phone rings through the Bluetooth speaker. You glance at the screen and see Rory’s name. You know what he wants but aren’t sure if you want to talk to him.

You sigh, knowing you’re breaking your promise. You’re not moving on; you’re still letting him contact you. Seeing him at Jazz's birthday party a few weeks ago almost sent you into another spiral. Why are you doing this? Were you that lonely?

You feel weak knowing you continue to let him text and call you, but at the same time, talking to him feels safe and almost comfortable.

Out of desperation for someone to soothe you, you answer.

"Hey," You say while pulling out of your driveway. You try your best to smile as you speak, hoping he won't hear the sadness in your voice.

"Hey, um. I was just calling to check on you. See how you're doing." He softly says, "Uh, how are you?"

Your eyes threaten to water again. "Shitty." You say, feeling like a broken record that keeps playing the same sad song over and over.

"Me too." He admits. "I was going to go visit her." You can hear the weakness in his voice as he tries to compose himself. "It being her birthday and all, I think she would like us there."

You never thought this was something you'd go through. You never knew heartbreak like this. If someone had told you ten years ago this would be your life, you would have laughed. Your life wasn't some fucked up tragedy.

"Yeah." You quietly say.

"Do you want me to meet you there, or can we drive together? I don't mind picking you up," Rory speaks with uncertainty. He didn't know how to talk to you anymore. He tried to keep things light-hearted and superficial, never getting too deep.

"I'm driving right now." You bite your bottom lip, wondering if you should offer to come to his house.

"Oh," Rory sounds surprised like he didn't think you'd leave bed today. "I can meet you there."

You deeply sigh, "Let me come pick you up. I'm close to you anyway."

"Yeah, I'll just get ready. Text me when you're here. I'll see you shortly."

"Yep, bye." You click the end button, unsure if you made the right decision.

You turn the radio on and do your best to escape your feelings as you continue to Rory's new home. The songs don't help you ignore your feelings like you'd planned. You turn off the radio and drive in silence until you arrive at Rory's house, and when you park on the curb, you text him. Here.

Seconds later, the door opens with a loud creak, and you slightly jump from the sudden sound. You look up and see Rory standing there, holding the door handle. He's wearing a gray zip-up sweater, flannel underneath, and plain blue jeans. He looks comfortable, but his eyes are tense and anxious.

You stare at Rory briefly before grabbing your things to make space for him. "Sorry. I have stuff everywhere." You speak fast as you try to throw some things in the back seat quickly. Talking on the phone was one thing, but sitting next to him brought feelings of discomfort.

“I thought it was supposed to be nice today…” He sighs, gazing at the dark clouds and the raindrops on the window. His voice tinged with sadness.

“The world doesn’t owe us anything.” You reply, sounding harsh.

You feel his eyes on you, searching and questioning you. The way you responded was unexpected. This bitter woman wasn't you.

You hate that he makes you feel weak and exposed and doubt your decisions.

“Stop.” You snap at him, trying to sound angry and confident but only sounding hurt and insecure. “Don't make me doubt myself for letting you in again.” You warn.

He shakes his head, shoulders slumped in defeat. He looks away from you as if avoiding your eyes. He breathes out heavily, revealing his exhaustion.

Rory knows this isn't the best time to bring this up, but he needs to get it off his chest, and after today, who knows when he'll see you again? “You know, I didn’t divorce you to hurt you.” He says in a quiet voice as if admitting a mistake. “I did it because I thought it would be better for both of us. I hoped you would heal and move on like I've tried to.” He meets your gaze again, his blue eyes filled with pain and longing. “I still love you and want the best for you.” He adds softly, making your heart clench. “But I couldn’t stay with you like this. It was tearing me apart to see you suffer and not be able to help you. I felt like I lost both of you.”

“So you decided to leave me alone in that house by myself with all of our things and all of her things and expected me to heal? How could you be so heartless?” You bite your lip, holding back the tears that threaten to spill. “You know what? Forget it..” You say, shaking your head. "I needed my husband...that's what I needed, and you walked away so easily."

“I didn’t want to leave you and it sure as fuck wasn’t easy! (Y/n), you stopped trying! She was gone for a full year! I didn’t know how to deal with it either. There was no guide for what we went through.” He tries to explain, but you can’t listen to him.

You scoff, “Yeah, right. Blame it on me. That’s what you always do. I get it!”

You pull into the cemetery’s parking lot and hastily park the car as if trying to escape him. The sky is a dull gray, reflecting your mood. The air is cold and damp, making you shiver.

You avoid looking at him as you leave the vehicle. You can feel his eyes on you, full of questions, when he sees you approaching him instead of walking away like you usually would. You pull the car door open and glare at him like you’re going to scold him, but your eyes soften when you see him lower his head, “You act like I don’t understand what you’re going through,” He whispers, his voice breaking with emotion. “I lost Gracie too, remember?” He reminds you.

You shake your head, tears filling your eyes and streaming down your face. "No, you don't understand. You don't have to live with knowing you're the reason she's gone." You say bitterly, feeling resentment towards him. "You have a life, a future, a chance to be happy again. I have nothing. Nothing but this pain that won't go away." You say, pointing at your chest.

He reaches out to touch your hand, but you pull away.

"Don't." You warn him. "Don't try to comfort me. Don't try to make me feel better. Don't try to pretend that everything is going to be okay because it's not." You say.

He gets out of the car and stands next to you. Wrapping his arms around you, he pulls you close to him, ignoring your protests and struggles. He’s getting better at ignoring your spew of mean words.

He holds you tight as if afraid to let you go. He kisses the top of your head and whispers in your ear. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry for not being there for you when you needed me most.." His voice trembles with emotion. "But we can find a way to heal and move on." He says, hoping his words will reach you and make you feel something other than anger.

You stop fighting and let him hold you, exhausted and drained from the emotional turmoil.

"I'm tired of being like this." You mutter against his chest. "I don't want to be like this, but it hurts so much." You confess.

He gently rubs your back, trying to soothe you. "I know." He kisses your temple, feeling your tears wet his skin. "Let me help you."

But you don't want his help. You fear he'd abandon you again.

You shove him away, escaping his embrace. You stare at him with a blend of sorrow and fury. “You can’t help me.” You snap, turning your back on him. “I don’t deserve to be happy again.” You nearly choked on your words, part of you knowing it wasn't true.

Rory’s mouth falls open, stunned by your words. He watches you walk away from him, feeling powerless and hopeless. He wishes he could make you forgive yourself, but he knows he can’t. He knows he’s losing you and fears it won’t be just mentally much longer.

Part 3

#rory culkin fanfic #rory culkin #rory culkin x you #rory culkin x reader #roryculkin #culkin cult #ex husband 2

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rd0265667 · 1 year

Text

Hanni x Reader: Like you wouldn't believe

Staring blankly at the heart locket in her hand, Hanni fidgeted a little, pressing the little button, the clasp unlocking with a click You were always so beautiful, She could get lost in your eyes forever. Oh, if only she could.

It was 3 years ago, she still remembers clinging onto your shoulder, nagging you about the journey "Did you take your pills?" She questioned, rummaging around your bag as you chuckled, reaching to the front pocket of your bag "Would you just calm down darling, even if I don't take these pills, I still won't forget you. I could never forget you, my love." You turned to her, ruffling her hair. She puffed her cheeks up, as you chuckled, squeezing her cheeks and laughing. "I've got to go now darling, but I'll text you once I get a signal again, okay? I love you" You whispered into her ear, as she nodded, giggling as she felt your light breath on her neck, before mumbling a soft "I love you too" "Link up?" She took her locket, pulling it up as you chuckled, pulling your half of the locket, merging it to form a heart. "Stay safe!" She shouted out, hugging you before you left. If she knew what would happen, she would have hugged you just a little longer. Hugged you forever.

Resting on her couch, the news flickered on her television, shattering her heart. "A ship has gone down near the Pacific Sea, and while some were able to make it to the life boats, there are a number of passengers who have been missing." Rushing to her computer, She found the list of passengers who were missing and were unable to make it on the lifeboats, her heart sinking. L/N Y/N

Seeing feet shuffle from the corner of her eye, Minji looked at the locket in my hand, a look of sadness and pity on her face, before she took her seat next to Hanni, buckling up as the air steward reminded her of the turbulence. In an obvious bid to get her mind off the locket, Minji pulled out a file of documents, setting it on her collapsible table Inside the file was the information about a songwriter Hybe wanted them to meet, the song writer being in charge of their next song and wanted to meet the girls to better understand how the song writing should be approached Sighing, She pushed the documents away, having read it beforehand, her eyeline finding itself back on the locket, and the person inside it. Even now, her heart still yearns for you.

After dealing with the normal dose of paparazzi, the 5 girls found themselves in the back of the company chartered van, speculating on the mysterious person they were supposed to meet. This person's work had received critical acclaim from many artistes, and NewJeans were the first Korean GG to be able to partner up with them "Hopefully he or she isn't some eccentric billionaire type." Minji chuckled as the 5 girls descended from the van, the others lightly chuckling before they were let into the studio. The 5 entered a room with papers scattered everywhere, and in the middle of the room, a figure sat, spinning in the chair to face the girls "Hi, NewJeans, it's a pleasure to meet you." The figure got up, bowing and greeting the girls. While three of the girls bowed, two of them stood in shock Unable to contain herself, Hanni charged at the figure, throwing them into a tearful embrace. "Y/N! Where have you been!" Hanni shouted as you stood, stunned before Hanni was forcibly removed from Y/N "Miss, just because you're an idol doesn't mean you get to touch whoever you want!" She shouted, before turning to you "Are you okay baby?" "I'm fine Jen" Recoiling, Hanni looked in confusion "Y/N, don't you remember me?" She questioned, her heart slowly breaking once again "Who are you?" Y/N asked, slightly breathless from the shock Feeling short of breath, Hanni grabbed her chest, her hand finding the locket which had what seemed like the last thing that was of her Y/N. "Wait, that!" Jennifer exclaimed, reaching into a drawer at the table, pulling out the other side of the locket, Hanni's eyes flaring open. "That's it! That's the other side of the locket, see!" Hanni ran up, connecting the 2 sides together, unclasping the lockets, expecting to see the joined photo that she and Y/N had split up for the locket. Instead, where there was supposed to be her picture, a picture of the girl Y/N was with instead. That same girl approached Hanni, looking at her with a look of understanding now. "You knew Y/N before the incident?" She asked, Hanni nodding as Minji ran up to comfort her. She then lead Minji and Hanni out into the empty hallway, as she introduced herself as Jennifer, or Yunjin if they preferred her Korean name, then explained what happened.

Jennifer was out at a nearby river, fishing when a small glint by the river caught her eye, and as Jennifer rowed over, she was shocked to find someone unconscious, hunched over a piece of debris as the waters buoyed the debris, waves dictating the movement. In shock, Jennifer quickly pulled the unconscious body onto her boat, rowing back to her house, where her mom, who just was a doctor, did preliminary checks on the body. After doing checks on the body, other than a concussion, no other major injuries had been sustained. You eventually came to consciousness, awaking in the small hospital ran by Jennifer's mom, the only hospital in the small town she lived in. You introduced yourself as Y/N, and thought that it was 2016. After checking the things you had on you, a locket with a picture ruined by the waters, and a bottle of pills., they did some checking, After some testing, Jennifer's mom determined that it was dementia pills, and that the concussion added with the early onset dementia resulted in memory loss, that would most likely be permanent(I know this isn't how Amnesia and Dementia interacts, but it's for the sake of the story)

Hearing that, Hanni fell backwards, Minji narrowly saving her from hitting the ground. 2016. Two years before you and Hanni got together. You meeting her. You forgot loving her. You forgot her. Her last promise to you. She forgot it.

As Hanni stood stunned in disbelief, Minji and Jennifer had to go back to official talk, agreeing to still continue the collaboration, Jennifer wanting Hanni to spend some time with you too. Even though she was your girlfriend, she didn't think it was her place to stop you from getting your memories back.

The meal was awkward, to say the least. Minji had explained the situation to the other 3 girls, and now, the 7 of them sat at the table together. Sensing the tension at the table, and the conflicted look on Hanni's face, Jennifer began serving up food to the NewJeans members and Y/N, setting a special side of Avocados for Y/N "Y/N doesn't like avacados." Hanni said, voice dripping with jealousy, and a little despair. "I do...Maybe the person you knew didn't like them, but I do." You said, Jennifer recoiling slightly at the harsh tone she had never heard you use before. Hanni stared at you lifelessly, before running out, tears dripping as Minji excused herself, going to comfort her friend. Frustrated, you buried your face in your hands. You hated this feeling. Slamming your fists on the table, you left, Jennifer chasing after you as the 3 girls were left sitting at the table, unsure of what to do.

"Y/N, why are you acting like this!" Jennifer questioned, looking slightly disappointed as you crossed your arms, your stern demeanour not dissipating. "You know I don't like thinking about the past, and now you're keeping someone here who's going to make me think of it 24/7, without even asking me first." You shot back, Jennifer pursing her lips together before walking to you, lightly holding your hand "Put yourself in her shoes Y/N. What if I disappear one day, and you thought I was dead for 3 years, only to discover that I was alive all that time, but I didn't remember you anymore and didn't want anything to do with you. How would you feel..." You hung your head, she was right, you hadn't considered how difficult this must be for Hanni. "I'll do what I can."

"Hanni, are you okay?" Minji shouted frantically as she raced through the studio, trying to find Hanni, only to find the Vietnamese girl burying her fist into a wall, screaming and crying as the wall felt merely a fraction of the hurt Hanni was feeling, her bloody knuckles colliding with the drywall, staining the white walls. "It's broke! Broken! A promise I spent the last 3 years believing. BROKEN!" Hanni screamed, unleashing another flurry of punches into the wall before falling to the side from exhaustion, her tears staining the ground she laid upon as Minji looked, the fact that her friend was in pain and she couldn't do anything about it was eating her up inside. She wanted so badly to help Hanni forget this pain she was feeling, forget how much it all hurt, but how? She got her love back, only to lose her love all over again. Minji wanted to tell Hanni that it was all going to be okay, that it wouldn't hurt so much, but Hanni had been lied to too many times. This would just be the latest in a long string of heartbreaking lies. As Minji helped Hanni up from the ground, Jennifer ran over, hearing the commotion, calling out for you to get the first aid kit.

"Are you okay?" You asked, lightly applying ointment to Hanni's knuckles, the idol gritting her teeth in pain "What do you care." She muttered out, her voice now monotonous. "I'm sorry, Ms Pham." You muttered out, cursing yourself the moment you said it, aware of the hurt it caused Hanni, noticing the void in her eyes as you applied the dressing over her wound. "Save it." She said icily, the only way she could talk without breaking down again. As you secured the dressing, she stood up, her left shoulder colliding into you as she left. From the back of the room, Jennifer came out, pinching the bridge of her nose in frustration. "Ms Pham? It's like you want to break her heart..." Still lightly peeved from the bump earlier, you rolled your eyes "You're forgetting that I don't know her! I might be her former lover, but to me, she's just Miss Pham. Pham Hanni of NewJeans. Nothing more than a business acquaintance. Nobody." You grumbled out, Jennifer sighing before tensing up, noticing a shadow at the door that bolted away just moments after. This was going to be tough. "Aish, just try, for her sake alright? We have a recording session in 3 hours." Jennifer said, patting your back as you packed up the first-aid kit

"So I whipped up some demos for you guys based on the music I've heard from you guys recently, have a listen." You explained, before turning the speakers on. Jennifer was sitting at your side, helping you with the inputs, and the NewJeans girls were sitting behind you two As the music played on, you couldn't help but look with a twinge of guilt at Hanni. From the few videos you had watched of her, she was usually a pretty bubbly and cheerful girl, so seeing her so lifeless and sad, especially because you were the cause of it, wasn't a great feeling. Behind you, Hanni sat at her seat, devoid of emotion, despite her rather pivotal role when it came to NewJean's discography, her mind was blank. Nobody. Nobody. That's all she was to you now. Nobody. She lowered her head once again, before something caught her eye, as she pulled a tissue out, extending it to you. Just before you could ask Hanni what that was for, you let out a sneeze, grabbing the tissue from Hanni's hand before uttering a thanks "How did you-" "Your right ear twitches before you sneeze." Hanni explained, averting her gaze from you once again "Wow, I didn't even know about that." You exclaimed, a little surprised that Hanni could notice something so minor "Yeah, not bad for a nobody huh?" Hanni shot back, your face lowering as you realised she had heard what you had said previously "Let's focus on the music, shall we?" Sensing the tension, Minji stepped in, trying to prevent another incident. You nodded, turning back to the computer as you felt Hanni's eyes on you, not knowing just how much longing and hurt hid behind her emotionless eyes

After the music session, the 5 girls headed back to the hotel, Haerin whispering to Danielle in the back of the van, Minji holding Hyein as she rested, all eyes on the heartbroken girl in front of them. Even as she slept, Hanni was plagued with a nightmare. A nightmare that was so real. Maybe because it was. Because the moment Hanni lost you all over again kept replaying in her head. She didn't have you back for more a minute, before cruel fate ripped you out of her arms once again.

Hanni knew it was a bad idea. She knew that it was just going to hurt going back to the studio early, by herself. But like a moth to a flame, no matter how badly it hurt her, she so desperately wanted to see you again. So, 2 hours before her group mates were supposed to leave the hotel, she left on her own, travelling to the studio. Walking into the studio, Hanni froze, her mind travelling back to the happy times she used to have with you, as your melodious laugh filled the studio. Hanni missed that laugh so much. She would watch your videos together when she was sad, when she was missing you, and watched the way you and her used to have fun, the way you would laugh out in joy and ecstasy when you beat her in a video game. But a video recording couldn't capture the way you made Hanni's soul feel a little better when you laughed, how you would make her happy when she didn't think she could be happy anymore. Hiding behind the pillar, Hanni peeked around it, seeing you tumbling around with Jennifer, your hair a mess as the two of you played around, jumping from place to place, side to side, giggling as she landed on top of you, tickling you as the two of you laughed, smiling and screaming. From behind the pillar, Hanni found herself smiling too. You were happy, Hanni missed seeing you happy.

Noticing the new shadow in the studio, Jennifer quickly got up from on top of you, awkwardly smiling to Hanni, "Hey Hanni, anything wrong?" Hanni smiled back, a happy look you hadn't seen since you met her two days ago. "Nope. Nothing at all"

The week went by in a flash. You and Jennifer produced about 3 songs for NewJean's new comeback, and you found yourself having pretty good chemistry with Hanni, working together well and bouncing off of each others ideas. Hanni was back to how you saw her on those variety shows, happy and energetic, messing around with her members in the studio and being an overall funny person. It was fun. The day that NewJeans headed to the airport to head back to Korea, you and Jennifer travelled to send them off. As you waved goodbye to them, you signalled to Hanni to wait a little, before turning to Jennifer, lightly grabbing her hand and squeezing it. "Could you wait in the car?" You asked, Jennifer getting a little nervous as she looked at you in confusion "I'll be with you in a bit. There's just something I have to do."

"What did you want to talk about?" Hanni asked as the two of you leaned on the railings to the departure hall. "I just wanted to apologise for the way I acted when you first got here, and say that I'm sorry I'm not the person you want me to be." You explained, looking up as Hanni turned over to look at you. "No, it was my fault, I shouldn't have acted as if you owed me your old self, and don't apologise. You might not be the person I fell in love with, but who you are isn't so bad either. Besides, I'm glad you're happy with Jennifer, she really loves you" Smiling, the two of you exchanged glances, before Hanni checked her phone, Minji rushing her to get in. "I've gotta get going. See you around" Hanni said, pulling her luggage along with her as she turned toward the hall, as you said goodbye, turning to move to the car. As Hanni walked slowly, she halted in her tracks once more as she heard your voice travel over to her. "I bet we were fun." You said, tears dripping down Hanni's face as a bittersweet smile adorned her face, reminiscing on all the happy moments she had with you. "Oh, like you wouldn't believe."

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