#I've got about 20 slots left and while some of that will go to a studio in the basement

[ahollowgrave]

L'APPEL DU VIDE

Mateus | Mists | W24 P29

The house Odette's great-aunt left her. Not in the mists in-character, but still cradled on the coast of Vylbrand on a decent plot of land. Most of the house remains closed off, in various states of abandonment, but the wing Odette does occupy is kept tidy. She has certainly added her own touches and has claimed an attic bedroom for her own. If you swing by for a visit please leave a message! And mind the shadows.

[lilcatdraws]

Crack A Smile and Cut Your Mouth

Ledger!Joker Origin Story

Chapter Eight - Life's Full of Surprises

Warnings: Character death, angst

Chapter Summary: Jack comes home and things are not at all how he imagined they'd be.

Author's Note: I'm gonna go ahead and apologize in advance 😅 I did not wanna have to kill off this person but it's character development for Jack. He's been through so much already I know, but you have to remember that it had to be a lot for him to eventually snap the way he does. You don't just randomly wake up one day and decide to become a mass murderer.

No I didn't use Heaven Beside You as the song inspiration because someone dies, it's deeper than that lol. I've also had this reoccurring scene in my head where Jack is driving down the road listening to the song at full blast. At this point he's broken from war and now this has happened. He's angry and hurting, mad at the world. This song just seemed fitting. Also I love Alice In Chains <3

Taglist: @alittlesmartcookie @furisodespirit

If you would like to be added to the taglist please let me know! <3

Jack walked through the bustling crowd of people with his head down and his hands in his pockets. He’d just got off a flight from Fort Benning. After he left Afghanistan, he went back there to finalize some things and officially be discharged.

The airport was not far from his hometown, less than thirty minutes away. Jack’s plan was to call the house and have somebody come pick him up. He knew it would most likely be his mother. 

He went over to the wall of pay phones and fished out a quarter from his pocket to put in the slot. He dialed his home phone number and waited. There was no answer. He tried a second time but still nothing. 

Okay… Scott’s probably at work and Mom must be out somewhere. Weird… I won’t bother with them then. 

He was unsure how he was going to get home now unless he rented a car. Then he remembered Mike. According to his mom during their last phone call, Mike was still going strong. Surely he wouldn’t mind taking him home.

Jack pulled a small notebook filled with contacts and another quarter out of his pocket and searched for Mike’s number. He was so glad he carried this with him. He wouldn’t be able to remember the number from all those years ago if he didn’t. The phone rang for a few moments and then someone picked up. 

“Hello?” A gruff voice said on the other end.

“Mike? This is Jack.”

“Hey! How ya doing buddy? Haven’t heard from you in a while.” 

“I’m alright I guess. Listen, I’m at the airport right now. It’s the one near Fairfield. I can’t get a hold of anyone at home and I was wondering if you could come give me a ride. I’ll be out front near the parking lot.”

“Of course. Give me about 20 minutes and I’ll be there.”

“Okay. Thanks Mike.”

Relieved that he had a way home now, Jack grabbed his stuff and headed towards the front. He sat down on a bench outside the building and watched the parking lot, bouncing his leg anxiously. He didn’t know why but since the plane landed he felt super jittery. He wasn’t sure if it was all the crowds of people making him uneasy or the thought of being home again.

Some time later he saw Mike’s car pull into a space. The short and stocky man climbed out and scanned the area for Jack. He spotted him and walked towards the bench, smiling. When he got there, he pulled Jack into a bear hug.

“Jeez, you’ve really filled out. How tall are you now?” He exclaimed as they walked to the car.

Jack laughed. “Good to see you too, Mike.”

He laid his duffel in the floorboard and climbed inside as Mike started the car and put it in gear. 

“So how’s army life been?” Mike asked. 

Jack shrugged. “Eh, hot and bloody. But that’s the desert for you.”

“I, uh, couldn’t help but notice the scar on your face. What happened?”

“A surprise attack. The humvee I was in exploded. I managed to make it out but a piece of shrapnel hit me.” Jack explained, shifting uncomfortably. 

“Oh. That must’ve been really bad. So are you home for good or are you just visiting?”

“I’m back for good now. I got discharged.”

“Why?”

“They said trauma reasons. I had a weird episode while I was over there. I think I could’ve made it a little longer but I guess they didn’t want to chance me having something like that while we were out on a mission. It could cause problems. I didn’t complain. I wanted to go home anyway and this was an opportunity to leave.” 

“Oh okay. Wow. Are you okay now?” 

“I don’t really know to be honest. I haven’t had anything happen lately but it could always come back. That kind of stuff is unpredictable.”

Mike grunted in agreement and focused on the road. Jack gazed out the window as they entered town and memories came flooding back to him. He was home alright. The jitteriness increased by the second as they got closer and closer to his house.

“How is my Mom?” Jack asked.

Mike slowed down drastically and nearly stopped in the middle of the road. He looked at him with a confused expression and seemed to be contemplating what he was going to say next. Now Jack was confused. Did he miss something?

“Don’t you know what happened?” Mike gasped.

Jack’s heart sank. “What? Is something wrong? Is she okay?” 

Mike sighed. “I think it’s best if you go home and find out. It’s not my place to tell you.”

“Um, okay… Is it bad?” 

“You’ll find out soon enough. I’m…I’m sorry, Jack. I thought you knew.”

Jack’s head was spinning. Oh God. No…

His main worry while he was away had come true. Something happened to his mother and he wasn’t there to help her. He sincerely hoped she was okay.

Mike turned down Jack’s street and pulled up to the curb in front of his childhood home. Jack grabbed his bag and turned to Mike.

“Um, thanks for the ride. I should go.”

Mike nodded grimly. Jack opened the car door and stepped out on wobbly legs. He felt sick to his stomach as he approached the house. 

He reached the top of the steps and took a deep breath. There was no telling what he’d find inside. He turned to Mike and nodded. Mike gave a thumbs up and drove away.

Jack set the duffel bag down on the porch and knocked on the front door, steeling himself.

“What? Who’s showing up here at this time of the morning? Better not be a fuckin’ cop!” A familiar drunken voice slurred.

Jack inwardly groaned. Here we go…

His father opened the door and started to throw something but hesitated when he saw his son.

“Jack? That you?”

“Yes.” Jack said calmly.

Scott tilted his head and stared at Jack, particularly his injured cheek.

“What the hell happened to your face?”

Jack looked down. “Shrapnel.”

Scott chuckled darkly. “At least you didn’t die. I was expecting as much.”

Jack narrowed his eyes. Forcing himself to keep it together, he ignored the comment and changed the subject. 

“Where’s Mom?” 

“Oh that bitch? Didn’t ya hear? She’s dead.”

Jack stood there a moment, staring back at the drunk in shock. He was unsure if he heard him correctly. 

“What?” He demanded.

“One night several months back we got into a fight. Then she hopped in the car and sped off from here. I had no idea where she was goin’. It was raining and she must’ve been too upset to drive because she crashed into an embankment and it killed her.” 

Jack felt tears form in his eyes but he quickly blinked them away. He would not let his father see him cry.

“You sick fuck! You’re lying!” 

“I’m not lying, Jackie. That’s what happened. Go look at the cemetery. She’s there.”

Jack wanted to hit him so bad. Why was he being so casual about this? He shoved Scott out of the way and stepped inside. The house was a wreck and smelled strongly of booze and weed. Dishes were piled in the sink and trash littered the counter and the floor. Maybe his mother really was gone. He refused to believe it.

“That’s not what happened! Where is she?” 

“What part of ‘she’s dead’ don’t you understand? Did you hit your head too hard out there or something?” 

Jack grabbed Scott up by his shirt collar, slamming him against the wall.

“You did this to her! Don’t tell me it was just a fight. You probably beat her until she bled. She wouldn’t’ve had to drive off like that if you’d just left her alone. You fucking piece of shit!” Jack screamed.

“Oh, look atcha all riled up. You think you’re some tough soldier guy now? You’re still the same weak little boy you were when you left.” Scott taunted.

Jack lost control and punched him in the face. Scott staggered backwards and tried to counter but lost his balance and fell over. Jack shook his head. This was pathetic. He could’ve really hurt him if he wanted to but he decided against it. This asshole wasn’t worth it.

“You…get out of my goddamn house. Go! Pack the shit in your room and leave. Take that black pick-up with you. I’m getting tired of looking at it.” Scott shouted from the floor.

“Fine. I wasn’t planning on staying anyway.” Jack muttered as he walked towards his old bedroom. 

He slammed the door shut as he entered and sighed. The tears came back again and this time they were harder to keep down. The realization hit him like a brick wall. His mother was dead. He didn’t even get a proper goodbye.

Jack ran his fingers through his hair and forced himself to focus on the task at hand. He needed to pack his things and get out. Quickly. If he stayed longer than necessary Scott might go off again. He did not have the energy to deal with that a second time.

His room was the same way it was when he left, except the dust and the cobwebs on the ceiling. The posters of his favorite bands were still on the walls. His drawings and sketchbooks were still there. His pocket knife was still on his nightstand. His bed was still made up and his clothes were still in his dresser and hanging up in the closet.

Before he got to work, Jack looked for more comfortable clothes to change into. He settled on a dark brown t-shirt and jeans. He gained a lot of muscle mass and grew a few inches taller while he was gone so it was hard to find clothes that fit well. 

After he got dressed, he went through his closet and his dresser and put his clothes in some cardboard boxes he found. He left the clothes he didn’t want or knew for sure he couldn’t wear. He also packed his music, his sketchbooks, his journals, his pocket knife, his skateboard, a few photos he had, and other useful things like a flashlight. He had no clue where he would go from here and what he might need.

He moved the boxes of stuff out into the hall. Double checking himself, he went through everything again to make sure he didn’t leave anything behind. Seeing that he was good, he stacked the boxes and carried them out to the truck, putting them in the passenger seat.

After a few trips, Jack hauled the last of his stuff towards the door. As he started to leave, he glanced over at Scott one last time. He was downing a beer and eating potato chips like an absolute slob. He didn't even look up. He couldn’t be bothered to at least say goodbye to his son. 

So why should I? Fuck him. Jack thought angrily.

He scooped up his things and flung the door open. A rage that Jack didn’t fully know the reason behind swept over him. He darted out to the carport where his truck was, not even bothering to close the door. He tossed the box inside as he climbed in the driver’s seat and sped out of the driveway. 

He was getting the hell out of here but first he actually listened to his father for a change and went to the cemetery to find his mama. 

…

The cemetery was less than 10 minutes away from the house and near a small church, which Jacqueline attended often. Jack used to go with her a lot, especially when he was little. He never fully agreed with or understood the Christian faith. He guessed there was some kind of higher power out there but he wasn’t really sure what. He only went with his mom when he was a teenager because it made her happy. 

Jack parked at the church and walked to the graveyard. The rusty gate made a screeching noise as he opened it. He trekked solemnly through the grass and scanned the rows of headstones for his mother’s name. 

Eventually he found her by a willow tree in the back corner. Wildflowers grew in abundance at the base of the tree and along the fenceline that surrounded the cemetery. Jack picked a handful of the blue and purple ones, knelt down by Jacqueline’s grave, and laid them in front of the headstone. He read the engraving and sighed as his suspicion was confirmed. 

Jacqueline died a few months into his third deployment. He understood why he didn’t find out at first because he was away from any US bases in Afghanistan where communications were. But when he came back to base after they were attacked, why didn’t he find out then? Maybe things were so hectic it was the last thing on people’s mind but still. He should’ve found out a long time ago.

Tears welled up in his eyes again and finally he let them fall. His poor mama didn’t deserve to suffer like she did and die so horrifically. He could only hope she went quickly and painlessly but he would never know for sure.

“I’m so sorry, Mama. I should’ve been here.” Jack sobbed.

He rested his head against the gravestone and just let himself openly weep for a bit. It had been a while since he had a good cry. He was already dealing with a lot. Trauma from the war, the hideous scar on his face, and now this. It was starting to feel like his life was slowly falling apart. 

Jack kissed his hand and then touched the gravestone. “Bye Mama. I love you. Always.”

Composing himself, he wiped his eyes before he stood up and walked back to the truck. He pulled out of the parking lot and started back down the road with no absolutely no idea where he was going or what the plan was. 

One thing was clear. He had to get out of here. This town held too many bad memories. If he was going to move on and get better, he needed to start over completely. The highway seemed like the best option right now. He’d take it until he figured out what to do. It wasn’t a very strong plan but it worked for now.

Jack finally hit the main road, leaving the small town in the dust. He was going 10 miles over the speed limit but he could care less. He was mad. This was not fair.

“Stupid bastard! Can’t even spare the decency to take her death seriously. I mean, what did I expect, but still! And I didn’t find out until now?! Almost three months later? No one stopped to think hey maybe we should tell her son! Oh no, he’s overseas, we shouldn’t bother him with that. That’s kinda something I need to fucking know!” Jack vented to the air. 

He reached down and grabbed his CDs from the floor, picked one, and inserted it into the truck’s CD player. While in the army he couldn’t enjoy music as much as he used to. The opening guitar riff on his favorite album as loud as he could stand it was so refreshing. It helped him to calm down a bit. He’d crash if he kept raging like this. 

Jack was furious at Scott for treating him and his mother like shit for so many years and being indirectly responsible for her death. And then to top it off, being completely careless and unapologetic about the whole situation. 

He was also angry with himself for not checking up enough back home. But what could he do thousands of miles away? He just had to accept that there was nothing he could have done about it. That devastated him.

Jack rolled down the window slightly to let some fresh air in, the wind blowing in his face. He belted out the lyrics of the next track as it came on and got lost in the music to let out his rage. 

He didn’t understand why all of this was happening to him. He was only 24 and he already had more problems than most people twice his age. Maybe this fresh start would be good for him. Being away from everything that caused him so much pain would be the best way to heal.

A few miles down the road, a gas station popped up out of the monotony of fields and trees in the middle of nowhere. Jack glanced at his fuel gauge. It was halfway to empty. He decided it would be a good idea to stop. There probably wouldn’t be another place to fill up for miles. So he parked beside a pump and went inside the store. 

“I need 10 gallons on pump 2 and a pack of Marlboro reds.” He told the woman at the counter.

The cashier grabbed the pack of cigarettes from the shelf and handed it to him. She rang up the total and told him the amount. As he dug some money out of his pocket and paid the cashier, Jack saw a flyer on the wall promoting Gotham City. It sparked a flicker of interest.

“Pfft. Nothing there but city scum and rich assholes.” He mumbled to himself as he left the store, dismissing the idea. 

After he filled up his gas tank, he lit a cigarette and started the truck, continuing down the road. At this point he was about an hour away from home. Aside from the military, he had only traveled outside his hometown a few times and not very far. From here on he didn’t know what was ahead. He could only read the road signs and glance at his watch to see how much time had passed.

Jack groaned as he passed yet another billboard advertising Gotham. This had to be the fourth one since he left the gas station. It was like it was trying to tell him something. But he did not want Gotham to be his only option just because he didn’t know what else to do at the moment. 

He’d heard many things about the city growing up. Some (usually people trying to get students to apply for Gotham University) said it was full of exciting opportunities and new experiences. Jack knew that was probably only true if you were wealthy or smart. 

On the other hand he mainly heard it was crime ridden and dismal, full of corrupt cops and politicians, and just simply trashy. Jack didn’t know if he could handle city life, especially since he was still adjusting to being a civilian again.

He passed another sign and threw his hands up in frustration. He couldn’t give up this easily but he needed to figure this out pretty soon. Currently he had no place to go and he didn’t like the idea of being homeless for too long. 

He had to look at the pros here. Renting a small apartment would be much easier than paying for a whole house in an obscure town and then there was the question of finding a house to begin with. If he went to Gotham, he could have a quiet life in an apartment all to himself. To him that seemed to be the best atmosphere for him to deal with all the trauma and grief. 

“Where else am I gonna go? I’m not staying back home in that God forsaken place and I can’t just live in the middle of nowhere. Homeless… Ugh. Fine. If there’s nothing vacant and if it’s too expensive, then I’ll find somewhere else. This will give me a chance to start over.” Jack told himself as if to solidify his decision.

So after much debate with himself, Jack began the three hour drive to Gotham City with nothing to go by but signs and an old map he found in his glove compartment. It was getting late in the afternoon and with everything going on he was feeling exhausted and super drained. He had to smoke another cigarette and keep some music on just to stay awake and alert.

He also hadn’t eaten anything all day so hungry was an understatement. He stopped at another gas station along the way and bought a deli sandwich and some Goldfish to snack on. 

Finally after a long, tiring journey up the interstate, Jack saw Gotham City’s skyline poke out over the horizon. He breathed a sigh of relief. He was still incredibly nervous about this but at least the driving part was over. 

As he crossed the bridge into the city, he marveled at how big everything was. The largest city he’d ever been in was Atlanta when he was stationed at Fort Benning and that was just passing through. 

Despite his anxiety, he was really looking forward to this new chapter. He was ready to move on with his life. He left his abusive homelife and got out of the military. Now it was time to focus on actual adult life. Becoming an adult while in the army did him no favors. It actually detached him further from everyone else.

This was going to be a major adjustment. That was for sure.

[warmaidensrevenge]

Love and pinball.

Pairings: Eddie x Chrissy x plus!size Fem reader

A/N: Why hello there. I know I've been MIA. But I'm back with a new fic..this part is a little short. But don't worry it's going to get longer as I go. Also, I hope you enjoy the new collage I made. I feel like a little kid learning how to use paint. So hopefully I can make kick ass ones when I get better at it. Anywho, thanks for reading. And as always feedback is greatly appreciated. Feel free to comment on your thoughts. Kay love you byyye.

Word count: 4,037

I do not give permission for anyone to post this anywhere else. Please respect all creators.

Warnings: 18+ no minors. Angst, slow burn, sexual implications, open relationship, language and not proof read.

Part 1: Who are you?

Summary: Eddie never wanted anyone more than Chrissy. But that just might change.

" What about her?" Chrissy nodded her head towards a girl at the snack bar.

Eddie didn't have to look at her to know he didn't want her. He didn't want anyone but Chrissy. Since middle school he had been in love with her. So when he finally got his chance in highschool to be with her. He made a promise to himself to keep her forever. And up until a year ago things were looking really good. Now in their mid 20s, things became a little boring. Well for Chrissy that was the case. She had asked him if they could open up the relationship. Of course at first he said no. But he eventually gave in. He loved her deeply and wanted her to be happy. So he allowed her to do it. The rules were, he didn't want them over at their apartment and he didn't want to know about the sex. Just that they used protection and got an STD screen every 3 months. Now it was a year later and he was unhappy. He had been since she asked. But it got worse. Especially now. Chrissy had forced him to go to The Palace to find himself a girl.

There were a bunch of young ladies that work at The Palace. So she thought he might be interested. Since he spent every Sunday night here when she went out on a date. Little did she know, he didn't go there on Sunday's to check out the talent. He went there because he needed a distraction from what Chrissy was doing. That distraction being pinball. Before he loved it. He would take Chrissy out and she would cheer him on while he played. Now, not only did he go to not be alone. But he went because he had a very competitive nature. And some little dweeb kept beating his high score on the old Grand Prix pinball machine. The game was way in the back and no one ever played it. Well until a few months ago. Eddie seemed to find himself in a battle of wits with some kid. He assumed it was since the notes and the 1 quarter left behind were meant to mock him. 

He never left any responses except for one quarter in the return slot. He thought that beating the kids' high score with exactly 1,000 points every time was enough to get the point across. 

Officially annoyed with Chrissy asking 'How about that one?' For the 6th time, he said he was gonna go and see if the kid had beat his score. There were so many people today. That's why he never came on Friday's or Saturday's. It was always a Sunday night thing when he came. Not that he didn't like kids. He still hung out with his buddies from highschool. Still played D&D, and still had shows at The Hideout. It's just now, all those things became hobbies. And now he had a job. He always liked working with his hands. So a job as a mechanic was perfect. He had the weekends off and that's when he had time to do the things he loved. However this week he got lucky to have a 3 day weekend. In which Chrissy thought he would want to spend it finding a girl he could start screwing. When all he wanted was to spend the long weekend with her. 

As he made his way through the sea of teens, he finally got close enough to see someone playing the very machine he was heading for. He got closer and was a bit taken back by you. The way you were dressed was a sight. Faded denim short shorts with a staff shirt that was tied in the back. Along with a pair of red chucks.

See if Eddie were to explain your outfit to anyone, they would think that there was nothing wrong with it. And there wasn't. It wasn't the clothes that made his eyes wonder and his pants tighten. It was your curves that had him in aww. From your large calves to your luscious thighs that touched,  your perfectly wide hips and up to your hair in two very cute buns. From the back you looked great. 

Eddie got a bit closer to try and see your face. But he didn't want to seem like a creep.

" Hey… Almost done." You said.

He looked around to see who you were talking to.

You chuckled. " Hey, curly McGee. If you're waiting for this. I'll be done in just a sec. I have to beat this twerps score."

Eddie smiled. How could he not? He had been completely wrong about you. He thought his arch nemesis was some little kid.

He finally saw your face and he couldn't help but laugh. Your brows were knitted together and your tongue was hanging out on the side. You were in the zone.

" YES!!! SUCK IT YOU PUNK!" You jumped up, pointing your fingers at the game.

Eddie took a step back to admire your little victory dance. Big beautiful breast bouncing, with a very stunning smile while doing the cabbage patch. 

" Alright bud." You sighed after. " She's all yours."

" Uhhh cool." He said. 

He then watched you pull out a piece of paper and jotted something down. Then placed a quarter in the middle and folded it. Putting it in the same spot as always. Just under the score.

You didn't look at him once. You just smiled at the game and left.

He reached for the note and rolled his eyes with a smirk on his face.

' Good luck loser.'

…

The next time he saw you was at the lake. Robin, who he now knew was your cousin, had invited him out. It was supposed to be fun. But Chrissy had a date. So he thought he would just have a beer and leave. That was until he saw you. You were in the water on a tube just laying there with sunglasses on and a pretty red bathing suit. Floating around with Robin. 

Eddie said hi to everyone. Seems like all his friends were there. The only person who stood out was you. 

He wondered what you were doing there. And how long have his friends been talking to you? He put down the foam ice chest he brought full of beer when you came out of the water and started walking towards him with Robin. 

" Eddie. This is my cousin y/n. Y/n this is Eddie Munson."

Your smile was beautiful. Your sun kissed skin glowed. The way your bathing suit fitted you so tight, could have any guy on their knees for you. That being the case for him right now.

Robin playful pushed him. "Munson?" 

Eddie blinked his thoughts away and shook his head a little.

" S-sorry Ed-eddie…Hi. " He said nervously. " I'm Eddie. Eddie Munson."

Your smile got even bigger and he swore his heart stopped.

"I'm sorry... Eddie is it?" You joked.

He chuckled and scratched the back of his head. 

You turned your gaze behind him. "Hey Steven. Are you ready to get your ass kicked in volleyball?" You teased walking past him.

Eddie's eyes followed you. Figures a gorgeous girl like you wouldn't remember him.

" It uhh was nice to officially meet you curls." You spoke over your shoulder. 

"L-l-likewise." He stuttered

He smirked to himself. Again you proved him wrong.

Robin pulled at his sleeve to get his attention. " Munson, I need to talk to you."

He turned to look at her. " Hey to you too. Nice weather we're havin'."

She shook her head. " Hi Eddie. Common. Follow me."

He agreed and followed her under a tree. 

She hung her head and cleared her throat." So Chrissy called me."

He jerked his head back a little. " What? Why?"

Robin sighed and looked over in your direction. " Apparently, she saw you gawking at my cousin a couple weeks ago."

He looked over and saw you playfully pushed Gareth who was obviously trying to flirt. Why all of a sudden he was jealous. He didn't know. But he didn't like feeling this way for anyone but Chrissy.

"I wasn't gawking Buckley." He turned to meet her gaze. " I was surprised, because she has been the one who's been playing the Grand Prix. I just thought it was some little kid."

Robin rolled her eyes. " Well whatever you did, got Chrissy to call me and ask to find out who she was." She nodded towards you.

" Why?"

She sighed again. " She wants me to make sure you get on more than the first name bases, if you know what I mean."

Eddie swallowed the lump that suddenly appeared in his throat. He looked back at you and you waved at him. He smiled and waved back. Should he? Could he? He went almost 5 years without wanting to be with anyone but Chrissy. But for some odd reason, this time felt different. Maybe because now he was allowed to.

"Honestly Eddie, I don't like it." 

He looked back at Robin.

" I get that you and Chrissy are in this weird relationship type thing. I'm not judging. But y/n is family. I know that we weren't close growing up and I just found out that we were related like a month ago. Now that I know, I want all of us to get to know her and spend time together… I'm not going to try and push you two together."

Eddie nodded. He didn't want that either. He didn't know exactly what he wanted. He just knew that even though he only got a max of 5 whole seconds with you, he wanted more. Though Chrissy came to mind. She always did. He knew that not only would this make her happy, but he had a gut feeling that you would be a great addition to the friend group. 

" Look Buckley. I really don't want a relationship with anyone besides Chrissy. A friend, I can be. But I think that's all I can be."

Robin smiled at him. " Great! That's all I can ask for."

Eddie grinned and nodded. He really did mean that. However, things were going to happen that he couldn't control.

He walked over and sat on the grass near the unofficial volleyball ball court. He smiled listening to you talk smack to the other team. 

" Oh I'm sorry. Was that a point?" You tease Steve. 

" You touched the net!" He retorted.

You smirked." You wish Steven. Just admit it. You suck."

" Oh please. You wish you were as good as me." Steve bit back.

" By good you mean, a guy with tiny wrists like yours that can't jump. Then I'm okay."

Steve pointed at you. " Hey! You take that back before I come over there."

You stuck out your tongue. " Sorry. Sucks to suck Steven."

Eddie chuckled, shaking his head. You're feisty.

After the game a new one started up. You came over to him and held out a beer, while sitting down.

" You look like a blue ribbon type of guy."

Eddie nodded. " How could you tell?"

He took the beer and sucked on the fizz when he opened it.

You shrugged. " I don't actually know. Just a feeling I guess."

It was awkwardly quiet after you said that. For the first time in a long time he was actually nervous. He wanted to say something but nothing sounded good. Then he thought.

Volleyball. Ask about volleyball.

He cleared his throat by taking a drink of the ice cold beer. Giving him a little bit more time.

" It's getting pretty hot." You said shielding your eyes.. 

" Y-yeah it is." 

" Want to cool off in the water?"

He looked at you and smiled. " Sure."

You clapped your hands and got up. " Common bud. Last one there is a burnt chicken nugget."

Eddie furrowed his brow and did a small laugh through his nose. " It's a rotten egg."

You turned around walking backwards. " I like mine better."

He grinned and got up. Following you to the lake. He stopped and took off his shoes and pulled off his shirt.

" AHHH MY EYES!" You teased. Holding up your hands towards him and looking away.

" Uhhh what?"

You laughed. " You need a tan curls."

" Today's the day for skin cancer I guess." He responded.

" Well no. We can't have that." You said coming out of the water. 

Eddie watched you head to a bag under a tree. When you came back you had a bottle.

You handed him the sun screen. " Spf 75. Anything above 40 is good for ink." 

" Didn't know that… Thanks."

You smiled at him. Making his palms sweat.

" Do you want help with your back?"

Umm I have a girlfriend." He blurted.

You jerked your head back a little and Eddie was too embarrassed to look at you.

Stupid stupid. Why the hell-

Your sudden laughter confused him.

" Uhh okayyyy…good for you bud. I wasn't hitting on you or anything like that. Just offering help."

He nervously laughed. " Erm…sorry I-"

" Nope." You held up your hand. " No offense. But you're not my type. And I'm sure if you didn't have a girlfriend. I wouldn't be your type either."

" Well you would be wrong."

You lifted a brow.

He gave you a thin lip smile. " I don't have a type."

You nodded. " I see. Well I apologize for assuming."

It was quiet again. Eddie didn't know what to say or do. He wished he hadn't said that. And now he was trying to figure out why he wasn't your type.

" So uhh do you want my help? With your back?"

" Y-yeah. I don't want to turn into a burnt chicken nugget."

You laughed. " I don't think anyone wants that."

He poured some of the cream on his hands and gave you the bottle. He braced himself for you to squirt cold lotion on. But he was wrong again. He felt your warm soft touch on his shoulders. You kept surprising him. Once you were done you gave him a slight push.

" Common curls."

He nodded. And before he got in two of his friends ran past him. Steve and Gareth grabbed you by your arms and legs. Both flinging you into the water. Before you went under you yelped. When you came back up you ran your hand over your face. Taking off your sunglasses. 

" Oh you little shits!" You said through your teeth. Eddie came out to check if you were okay. You shook your head to the side to drain the water from your ear.

" You good?" He asked.

" Yeah bud. Ummm could you give me a hand?" You nudged your head towards the chuckling Steve and Gareth.

" With pleasure sweetheart."

You beamed a smile at him. " On the count of 3."

He nodded and you started to count. But when you got to 3. Instead of saying 3 you said 5. Catching him off guard. He gave you a confused look but you just laughed and lunged at Gareth. Eddie shook his head and went for Steve.

After a while Eddie found himself on a donut tied to yours. Just floating around. The sun was going down and he could hear his buddies playing around with fireworks. Normally he would be right next to them. Lighting a few, if not all of them. But being around you felt different. It was exciting and fun. You said and did things that had him on his toes. But as the sun set you seemed to be getting tired. You were less rambunctious and more calm. He was too. 

" Why didn't your girlfriend come?"

He opened his eyes and looked over to you. " Umm. She uhh had to work."

You gave him a half smile. " That's a shame. I would have liked to have met her."

" I'm sure you will…that is if you plan on hanging out with us more."

You sighed and smiled at him." I look forward to it." 

…

A few weeks after the day at the lake, Eddie was supposed to have a date night with Chrissy. However, she had to cancel due to work stuff. So bummed and bored he called up Gareth and asked if he wanted to go to The Hideout.

When they walked in and it was busier than usual. They found a couple of empty stools and hurried to grab them. 

" What can I get you?"

Eddie looked up as you placed napkins in front of them. 

" Hey! What are you doing here?"

You grinned at Gareth. " I work here sometimes. When it's busy like this." You looked over to him. " Hey bud."

Eddie smiled. " Hey sweetheart…can I get uh-"

You turned around and pulled out a beer for him. " Blue ribbon." You said with another beautiful smile.

He chuckled. " Yeah. Thanks."

You looked over to Gareth. " Let me guess." You narrowed your eyes for a second and grinned. " Apple wine cooler."

Gareth's eyes widened. " WHAT?! NO! Give me a blue ribbon too."

You leaned in so that only they could hear you. " I'll put that wine cooler in a glass. It will look like beer." 

Gareth was embarrassed but he whispered a small thanks.

Eddie nearly spit out his beer. He turned to laugh. 

Gareth punched his arm. " Shut up man!"

" Sorry man. That's just hilarious."

" Well I think that the man has taste." You winked at Gareth. Leaning over just a bit over the counter. " Honestly, beer and hard liquor are gross. Fruity drinks are the way to go." 

You leaned back and rang them up. When you left to help other customers, Eddie couldn't help checking you out. You had on knee high boots with a tight leather skirt. It hugged your round ass so perfectly that he nearly drooled. And the pink halter top only added to your sexiness. 

" She's something huh?" Gareth asked.

Eddie's tongue shot out and moistened his lips." I uhhh…yeah."

" She's single you know."

Eddie looked at his best friend. Giving him a thin lip. " I'm not."

Gareth sighed. " Maybe it's time you should be."

Eddie looked back at you laughing away. His heart leaped. "Maybe."

…

Later that night. You were trying to turn on your car. But it would work. Eddie stayed for a while after Gareth went with some girl. He wanted to make sure some drunk asshole wouldn't bother you.

He went outside when he didn't see you behind the bar after using the restroom. When he walked around the corner of the building he saw you lifting your hood.

" Hey."

You looked over your shoulder. " Oh hey. I thought you left."

" Was just about to. Uhh do you need help?"

You looked back down at the car. " I need a jump. I think I accidentally left my lights on."

" I have cables in my van. Let me pull it around."

You nodded and he went. 

When he came back you were leaning against the car with your ankles crossed and holding yourself. Before he could actually think, he grabbed a blanket from the back and jumped out.

" Here. Don't want you to freeze sweetheart."

You thanked him and wrapped yourself up like a burrito. He smirked seeing how cute you looked. He went to grab the cables and started to hook them up. 

" Try turning it on, yeah?"

 You nodded and went. But it didn't want to start.

" That doesn't sound like your battery's dead. It sounds like your starter went out."

Your brows knitted together. "Oh…umm. Sorry. I didn't know. I thought I was forgetful again."

Eddie walked to the driver side and bent down so he could see you. " Don't be sorry. But umm all the body shops are closed right now. You could get it towed to one."

You looked away and looked like you were about to cry. " Umm yeah…okay" 

The way you said it made him feel sad. 

" Or." 

You looked at him again. " Or?"

" Or I can go to the shop I work at and get a truck. Then I can work on it tonight."

He saw you blink away your tears.

" Um no you don't have to do that. I-I can wait."

" Hey." He said, grabbing your hand. "Let me help you."

A few seconds passed before you agreed.

…

You were sitting on his swivel chair. All wrapped up, watching him work. He could feel your eyes on him. And he liked it. Every once in a while he would look up and catch you just before you looked away. Every time he smirked to himself. 

" S-so. Curly one. How long have you worked here?"

He grunted trying to get a bolt loose. " About 4 years."

" Nice. Do you like it?"

He quickly glanced at you and you were rocking back and forth with a little smile. 

" Yeah. It keeps me calm."

" That's good." 

He smiled at you and stood up straight to stretch his back. 

" So uhh what do you do other than work at The Palace and The Hideout sometimes?"

" Oh just a little bit of this and a little bit of that."

He turned his head a little and side eyed you. 

You giggled. " Okay. So during the day I work at a daycare. And nights or weekends I do side jobs. Like bartending or emptying out coin slots. You know. Real challenging stuff."

He laughed. " I can see how one would find that difficult."

You laughed and he felt a warmth in his chest that he hasn't felt in a long time. He bent over again trying to get access to what he was working on.

" How do you like working with kids?"

You got up and leaned next to him. " I love it. I have so much fun with them. And they're just so cute with their chubby cheeks and tiny shoes."

Seeing you so happy about your job made him feel excited for you. He was happy that you were happy. 

" Do you plan on having kids?" He asked.

You sighed happily. " Oh I hope so. I want 5."

" 5? Really?"

You leaned over and caught his eye. " Oh definitely. Have to keep it an even number."

He chuckled at your joke.

" What about you?"

He stood up straight and wiped his brow with his shirt. " Uhh yeah. But I want 7."

" SEVEN!? Jesus!"

" What? Too much?"

You giggled. " Nah. That's a good amount. The bigger the family the more spare parts."

Eddie shook his head and laughed. " You're something else, you know that?"

" Thanks. I try."

You both stared at each other for a second. He wanted to move closer to you. He wanted to know how soft your lips were. How your tongue would taste like.

" So ummm." You broke eye contact first. " How does your girlfriend feel about 7 little ones?"

Shit Chrissy.

" Uhh we uhh haven't talked about that yet."

" O-oh. Sorry. I-"

" It's just uhhh. She's busy. And we hardly see each other."

You were quiet and Eddie could feel the tension building. He had a thought. Maybe if he told you the situation, could you be interested? Or would you turn and run away? A part of him wanted someone to talk to about this problem. But another part of him just wanted to keep quiet and wait until Chrissy finally gave it up. At the same time he didn't know if he could ever get back the relationship he had before. Did he still want to? Or was it time to move on? Maybe with you?

He went back to work while you went to sit back down. He didn't mean to make you feel awkward. But he did. And now you were quiet. He wanted to know what you were thinking. 

" So uhh when do you see her?"

He didn't look at you this time. He kept his eyes on what was in front of him. " Well Saturday's normally. But she had to work."

" Oh... Well you'll see her in the morning. Make sure to give her extra kisses. And tell her you missed her."

That comment made him smile. He looked at you and you seemed genuinely sincere. 

" Will do sweetheart."

" Good. Now will you hurry up. I'm freezing here."

He chuckled. " Yes ma'am."

…

[stuffyflowers]

Started playing PS Outertale a few hours ago and I have, thoughts.

For the most part, geno has been a chill time. There are some tweaks I really appreciate, like the grinding being so quick and skipping dialog by holding C. Asriel was a little jarring at first, really did not like the way he talked down to Papyrus (and that bit where he's pretending Sans is still there? eugh), but once we were past not-Snowdin I really started to appreciate him. His relationship with Frisk/Chara/The Player/Whatever is really intriguing, especially how Frisk or whoever genuinely seems to reciprocate his feelings. Love the Best Friends Setting The World On Fire vibe we got going on.

I did kind of feel like the game was just, really easy? I beat Undyne the Undying without dying, and that's without knowing what the new spear attacks did. But a lot of her normal attack were just like, easier versions of her original attacks? I did like the extra attacking mechanic and how it was still loosely DDR esc like green soul mode.

Beat Mettaton on my second try. Orange soul mode was neat. A little weird to get used to but it didn't offend. Defiantly a little harder that Undyne but not a huge step up.

Alphys... I REALLY do not like this fight. As of writing this I have not beaten it and I don't thing I will. There are a just, lot of little things that just drag the whole thing down for me. For one, Screen Shake. Lasers shake the screen, the expanding rings shake the screen, hell, even the damn MUSIC shakes the screen! I can't see where I am or what I'm supposed to be dodging! Second, the obnoxious spinning background. It's distracting and bugs the hell out of me. Third, the music. It's very meh imo, gets grating after a bit and just sounds like noise now. So far my biggest issue is that her attacks are 1000 years long. Each one feels like three for four attacks in one. Sometimes I'd get most of the way through an attack and just, get fatigued and take my hands off the keyboard cause I'm so overwhelmed.

I've never felt like this before. I don't usually mind a challenge, I actually like throwing myself at a problem until I break through. I loved beating UTY geno without using any equipment (Only Rubber Bullets, the Patch and the Toy Gun. Honestly if you're looking to play UTY geno again but harder I highly recommend), and that was a grind that took weeks. But this? I have absolutely no desire to return to this. I can't honestly say the fight is even good or bad cause I just can't get into it. This is the worst time I've ever had fighting an UT boss, and I don't think that was the intention.

I don't know where I was going with this. I just had a lot of thoughts and felt the need to share them.

Fun fact u can hold alt+press left twice to open the debug menu and get temmie armour infinite hp etc etc would highly recommend using whenever a fight annoys u lol im not grinding for this game. I agree w ur alphys boss complaint so much, I almost got my ass beat WHILE using th temmie armour, the patience soul mode is just not made for a boss fight of that scale I don’t think, especially not one where it piles on what feels like 20 attacks in one turn. It’s so sad bc I was genuinely pretty hyped to see final boss alphys, seeing herself as the one to blame for everyone’s deaths in this route coulda made up for the nothingburger she was given in pacifist but it was just. Eh.

Also asriel is just very funny to me. This au really only cares abt asriel and twinkly seems to exist just to fill floweys slot which is smth I don’t care for, but I at least appreciate they let him be an edgy little shit rather than playing into the idea that having a soul would magically fix flowey/twinkly and make him a normal kid again. I like that frisk is kind of just fucking around ig, it makes a funny contrast against asriel. I wish the route used the frisk/asriel/mk trio more also. Idontknow I still haven’t fully figured out how I feel about this route it’s so weird. I did enjoy it more on average than lv0 pacifist tho so that’s. Something?

[theworldvsyoshiko]

And, finally for now, the current state of things.

Yoshiko's got what I'll call decent, but not great, late-early-game kinda gear.' Of note: her Airwire Headset, the thing that lets her control several more mechanoids, is just about busted, and she isn't useful enough to make a new one. She's pretty pissy that I'm forcing her to keep wearing it, especially because as I already mentioned, her position entitles her to a beret, which uses the same slot.

Here's the base as it stands right now:

Livestock pens, currently holding several alpacas and one goose for eggs. Don't get too attached to these guys, because some of them die every time there's a fire, which is roughly once a week.

The graveyard, because I wanted a running tally of how many people she's killed. Current tally: 20.

The main entrance, aka a gauntlet of traps with a turret. This is pretty new, and long-term it's probably going to become a killbox that's a bit more detached from the base. (To the north you'll see a long power line from when the wind generator used to be to the NW.)

The prisoner quarters. Currently hosting a prisoner! Might release him. Might try to recruit him. More on that later.

Dining room.

Walk-in freezer. 'But isn't it kinda a bad idea to give your freezer wooden walls facing an area that you just said gets set on fire weekly?' Yes. Yes it is. I'm working on it.

Kitchen.

Research room + the comms console, because it had to go somewhere.

Batteries + generators.

Mechanoid creation facilities.

Hospital.

Yoshiko's meditation room, which doubles as the room for rituals right now.

Yoshiko's bedroom. Later on, this will be moving.

Garden, currently featuring rice and cotton. Also there's a giant sloth there in the picture.

Mami's room.

Genetics lab. More on that later too.

Raw materials storage + the wind generator.

Currently unused, because I just rebuilt this area.

Used to be the rec room, but I hurriedly reworked it when Mami showed up, so now it's a classroom with a billiards table in it. A cool classroom, for sickass kids.

Crafting room.

Dry goods storage.

Near-term goals, in roughly descending order of immediacy:

Research solar power. The wood-fired generators are a decent staple, but right now I still run out of power if the wind is dead for too long.

Either get this prisoner out of here, or recruit him. Either one is going to take a while, since he's pretty freshly injured and Yoshiko is horrible at social interaction.

Gather some more genes so Yoshiko can genetically modify herself for things like not getting food poisoning so easily. This will very likely involve taking some genetic samples from prisoners against their will. Genetically modifying yourself requires a days-long recuperation period while the new genes set in, so that's going to be a pretty risky move.

Build better defenses, because I've reached the wealth level where the game is willing to throw multiple enemies with actual firearms at me.

Move some of the more critical parts of the base into that mountain in the left, which will make them safer from a few existential threats.

Summon the Diabolus, which will let me build better mechs if I can kill it.

Buy a big batch of Luciferium, and get Yoshiko started on it. This will essentially give her a terminal life-or-death addiction, in exchange for making her nearly impervious to pain and disease, all-around more capable, and able to recover from most lasting injuries. With a single colonist, maintaining a steady supply isn't too hard, and it sinks a decent chunk of money into consumable goods, which will keep the colony wealth (and thus the difficulty of raids) down. Disease and passing out from pain are two of the biggest weaknesses of a lone colonist, so this will boost her survivability by a ton.

And, just to put it somewhere, the current mod list, courtesy of RimPy. I'd like to have Combat Extended in here too, but it currently seems to be in a weird spot:

Prepatcher [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2934420800]

Harmony [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2009463077]

Core [https:// no link (local mod)]

Royalty [Official DLC] [https:// no link (local mod)]

Ideology [Official DLC] [https:// no link (local mod)]

Biotech [Official DLC] [https:// no link (local mod)]

HugsLib [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=818773962]

Beautiful Outdoors [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2011794898]

Food Alert (Continued) [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2017538067]

Inspiration Tweaks [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2117570018]

Interaction Bubbles [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1516158345]

Losing The Faith [https:// no link (local mod)]

More Harvest Designators! [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1541250497]

Pathfinding Framework [https:// no link (local mod)]

Real Ruins [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1552146295]

Skill Master [https:// no link (local mod)]

Stabilize [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2023407836]

Vanilla Expanded Framework [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2023507013]

Vanilla Animals Expanded [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2871933948]

Vanilla Animals Expanded — Caves [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2576512001]

Vanilla Animals Expanded — Endangered [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2366589898]

Vanilla Animals Expanded — Royal Animals [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2858079457]

Vanilla Animals Expanded — Waste Animals [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2962126499]

Vanilla Apparel Expanded [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1814987817]

Vanilla Armour Expanded [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1814988282]

Vanilla Backstories Expanded [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2861806869]

Vanilla Base Generation Expanded [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2830358905]

Vanilla Events Expanded [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1938420742]

Vanilla Expanded - Ideology Patches [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2566669771]

Vanilla Expanded - Royalty Patches [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2260012940]

Vanilla Factions Expanded - Insectoids [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2149755445]

Vanilla Factions Expanded - Settlers [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2052918119]

Vanilla Furniture Expanded - Architect [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2608762624]

Vanilla Furniture Expanded - Art [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1968134023]

Vanilla Furniture Expanded - Farming [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1957158779]

Vanilla Furniture Expanded - Power [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2062943477]

Vanilla Furniture Expanded - Production [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1880253632]

Vanilla Weapons Expanded [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1814383360]

Vanilla Factions Expanded - Medieval [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2023513450]

Vanilla Furniture Expanded - Security [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1845154007]

Vanilla Furniture Expanded [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1718190143]

Vanilla Furniture Expanded - Spacer Module [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2028381079]

Vanilla Hair Expanded [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1888705256]

Vanilla Ideology Expanded - Anima Theme [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2666998627]

Vanilla Ideology Expanded - Icons and Symbols [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2552609458]

Vanilla Cooking Expanded [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2134308519]

Vanilla Fishing Expanded [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1914064942]

Vanilla Ideology Expanded - Memes and Structures [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2636329500]

Vanilla Ideology Expanded - Relics and Artifacts [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2564895018]

Vanilla Plants Expanded [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2134308522]

Vanilla Plants Expanded - More Plants [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2748889667]

Vanilla Plants Expanded - Mushrooms [https:// no link (local mod)] Vanilla Social Interactions Expanded [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2439736083]

Vanilla Textures Expanded [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2016436324]

Vanilla Traits Expanded [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2296404655]

Vanilla Weapons Expanded - Grenades [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2194472657]

Vanilla Weapons Expanded - Laser [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1989352844]

Vanilla Weapons Expanded - Non-Lethal [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2454918354]

Biomes! Core [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2038000893]

Biomes! Islands [https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2038001322]

[incarnateirony]

Does the LGBT part of "LGBT SciFi-romance" have to be included if LGBT folks just openly exist in a show (like Carlos) or more specifically if they're going to be smooching each other onscreen?

...kinda yeah. It sucks, and it's slowly changing, but I've bitched about market segregation before. One of the main reasons it was so goddamn hard to turn around the Destiel ship originally was it was neither pitched/marketed as an LGBT product or a romance. And you see that it was like trying to steer the titanic to avoid an iceberg just to get front gay characters, and even then they were kinda. lowkey. And dumped in bathtubs. Like I don't think this fandom WANTS to truly appreciate how much legwork Berens did to run the ball as far as he did with Cas.

But that's also why CW felt so... fake. LOOK WE HAVE A GAY CHARACTER ARENT WE WOKE. LOOK, A BLACK CHARACTER. Because, basically, that's what it got sold to them as. They hit a checkbox for "diversity" and get thrown in the diversity bin. And for some reason kids fell for it and I'm like wtf this channel used to be like 50% black people 10% gays 20% other races 20% sit down in your place whities how do people know history this bad to fall for this.

Like I've always been cynical and pissed as fuck that people listened to CW's "WE HAVE GREAT REP" no you fucking don't. You stole our fucking airspace after picking apart Atlanta. And I came back with a baseball bat and a whole lot of white people that suddenly cared a decade or two late because the coconuts didn't kiss, and we smashed their fucking kneecaps, hence Everybody Loves Chris and the like swinging its advertisement into the slots on Digital, for example.

Notice Nexstar isn't sending off obnoxious fucking flares and slapping rainbows on their shit and putting a Person Of Color lead in a marketing terrarium to feed like crickets to so CW gets praised for it. But the content is still fucking there. Nexstar's CW isn't disingenuously screaming LOOK HOW DIVERSE WE ARE. AA IS BLACK AND AAH IS BLACK AND THE WINCHESTERS FIVE IS REPRESENTATIVE OF REAL US DEMOS TILTING OUT OF WHITE (3/5 POC). They COULD slap a rainbow flag over Carlos and shit (and may like, on pride month) but it's not them pointing WE HAVE A GAY. LOOK GUYS. WE HAVE A GAY. COME STUDY HIM LIKE A BUG.

no like they just exist. but I don't think jensen knew nexstar would actually be chill when he was making it or whatever. And he still had to deal with WB. So he SECURED his exclusivity deal to use WB properties, he PITCHED his product, he GOT then liking it with John and Mary, and then they moved to treatments and shit once there was a script commitment.

So Jensen played this. Hilariously smart. Check it out: He got his licensing clearance via old WB but WBD can't undo that and is looking for new franchises anyway. THEN he pitched it as JohnMary romance, so boom. Winchesters gets cleared as a Romance, which was another stalling point in SPN.

Then, well, Jensen built CM the way it was for a reason. So part of that stamp was knowing this was going to have forward LGBTQ characters, and that's part of that stamp. They have Renee Reiff, again, running CM. Even Zaslav has reasons to fear Reiff. Zaslav pisses off Reiff Jensen can unleash the wrath of every gay DC creative on WB. Zaslav wouldn't fuck around anyway, bc Roth told him Winchesters Is It, Roth advised on properties and is like, no one is left that has been with it as long as him, you're new, just let him do his thing [rubberstamp rubberstamp rubberstamp]

And again, nexstar doesn't really care. Pedowitz might have tried stunting, especially for old WB or CBS whining we were actually gaying up the channel too bad, but thankfully Dennis threw him out the door, so that's not an issue. Nexstar just wants the ratings, it don't give a FUUUUUUUUUUUUCK what gives it to them, they just had to sell their Chicago properties just to try to level out losses in the CW, which is WHY the licensing fees are being reduced.

So while it matters a little less than how hard it nailed SPN down in the day, yes it matters, and I keep fucking SAYING this fandom won't unpack its trauma even when Dean is telling them to, and to pay the fuck attention to why he made these choices and why the socials are openly and almost primarily engaging DeanCas shit. They'd rather let fandom liars, doxxers, grifters etc like teamfreewill2pointo (pinned post for context) just scream and scream and whip bullshit up from wholecloth or badly googlefu his way through life to tell them NO, IT'S NOT HAPPENING BECAUSE [reaches up own asshole, forages around in there, pulls out a card] OLD REASONS THAT ARENT APPLICABLE ANYMORE [NODS ASSERTIVELY]

Everything in this show was built with dedication and love to make it bombproof to the end. Fandom just won't appreciate it till they get what they want in an extremely tunnelvisioned way, which honestly makes me angrier than anything

[kylesvariouslistsandstuff]

Lots of Disney animated releases...

A couple of days ago, The Walt Disney Company rolled out a monstrous slate of largely untitled releases from their "Walt Disney Pictures" division (makers of their live-action movies and CG tech demo pictures like LION KING 2019 and JUNGLE BOOK 2016), Walt Disney Animation Studios, and Pixar.

The new dates on the board...

11/20/2024: UNTITLED DISNEY ANIMATION

06/13/2025: UNTITLED PIXAR

11/26/2025: UNTITLED DISNEY ANIMATION

03/06/2026: UNTITLED PIXAR

06/19/2026: UNTITLED PIXAR

11/25/2026: UNTITLED DISNEY ANIMATION

The typical Thanksgiving slots for WDAS, still one-a-year for them. Pixar has now eased into doing two every two years, with a picture in March and a picture in June... Seems like that's the lock for the time being, unless some major changes have to happen with a picture. (a la, say, THE GOOD DINOSAUR... But we're not in the Lasseter era anymore, so...)

A few posts ago, I wondered aloud what the next WDAS movie after WISH could be... We know that filmmakers Josie Trinidad, Suzi Yoonessi, and Marc Smith all have pictures in the works. There's the possibility of another feature-length sequel happening, be it a FROZEN III or maybe a ZOOTOPIA sequel, while BIG HERO 6 and MOANA got or will be getting Disney+ miniseries continuations. Something like ENCANTO, I feel, will go the latter route because what could you possibly make a feature-length movie sequel about? WRECK-IT RALPH is but done, what with the way RALPH BREAKS THE INTERNET ended and also, director Rich Moore left WDAS a while ago. (He's now at Skydance after a brief stint at Sony Animation.) Then I suggested... What if WDAS revived a cancelled project like GIGANTIC? Or KING OF THE ELVES? Or COSMIC 3000? Not that it hasn't happened before, but... One can dream, right? That's a big part of Disney, innit? Dreams? But I'd imagine one of those cancelled films, should they be revived, will not be from Trinidad, Yoonessi, or Smith. I'd imagine they'd be tackling stories they themselves came up with, not taking over projects that used to be someone else's respective ideas.

Now, the interesting thing is, before WISH had ever been announced, all we hound-dogs that are always hounding for secrets and news... All we knew was that Trinidad, Yoonessi, and Smith had original projects in the works. This was announced back in fall 2019, when FROZEN II was weeks away from theaters. At that time, Carlos Lopez Estrada had a movie in the works, too. His own movie - not RAYA AND THE LAST DRAGON, which became his (and Don Hall's) movie after a major eleventh hour director shakeup - is no longer a thing at WDAS from what I understand. It was rumored to have been titled FOSTER, and could've come out this year if plans held, as Feature #62. He was also lined up to direct a live-action/CG ROBIN HOOD remake, but he's not working with Disney, period. He's off doing other things... I wonder how long WISH was in development, because it seems to have been the one to jump to the rescue... Prior to WISH's announcement, I don't remember *any* piece of news saying that directors Chris Buck and Fawn Veerasunthorn were working on a feature at the studio. You would think that, given Chris' success with the FROZEN movies and TARZAN and his status as a Disney veteran (you can see his name on THE FOX AND THE HOUND, released in 1981), we would've known he had a new picture coming after FROZEN II was released to beaucoup box office. WISH was just such an out of the blue announcement, though it was in the works for a long while, so I've heard... I guess it being a celebratory centennial picture is a good enough reason to really shroud the thing in secrecy!

There's three slots on the schedule now, and I'm thinking... Yeah, the 2024, 2025, and 2026 slots go to whatever it is those three directors are working on... If they're still set to direct their own pictures, that is.

That brings us to Pixar...

Pixar has made it known that a few filmmakers have features lined. We have Kristen Lester, who directed the SparkShort PURL, her movie has been in the works for a while and I'm assuming that this will be next after INSIDE OUT 2 opens in June 2024. I remember thinking it would be the early 2024 movie, until it was confirmed that COCO co-director Adrian Molina secretly had a movie of his won in the works, which is ELIO. Enrico Casarosa and Peter Sohn's movies snuck up on us like that, too. So, now, I assume the summer 2025 Pixar is Lester's movie. It's been nearly six years since PURL was shown to the public via Disney+.

There's also Rosana Sullivan, who also directed a SparkShort, KITBULL. Then we have Aphton Corbin, no surprise, another SparkShort director, hers being TWENTY SOMETHING. Domee Shi, director of TURNING RED and the short film BAO, has a new feature lined up as well. What order these all come out in? Who knows! Whichever ones advance the fastest, whoever gets theirs to a satisfactory shape before animation is done. It could be any of these directors except Shi, because TURNING RED came out less than a year ago. I'd imagine her new movie is approximately 3 years away at the minimum. Could be the spring or summer 2026 movie, could not be.

Hey, does anyone remember Brian Fee had an original picture in the works? Brian Fee's feature directorial debut was CARS 3, and it was quietly made known that he had a movie of his own in the works... We've heard little about that since then. If his film is still a go, it could come out over the next few years... Maybe not! Bob Peterson, who was supposed to direct THE GOOD DINOSAUR, might have a feature. That has been hinted at back when GOOD DINOSAUR was released, that he was going to direct a new picture. But it's been nearly 8 years, so I don't know. Other SparkShort directors, such as Madeline Sharafian (BURROW), Brian Larsen (SMASH AND GRAB), BOBBY RUBIO (FLOAT), Erica Milsom (LOOP), Steven Hunter (OUT), and the like could be gearing up for features of their own.

Then there's that million dollar question, literally... Will there be any more sequels? I honestly did not expect INSIDE OUT 2 to be a thing, let alone be announced, prior to this past D23. Now you're probably thinking, "Kyle, the first INSIDE OUT made nearly $900m at the worldwide box office! Of course they'd make a sequel!" But, I wasn't sure. Many originals were lined up, and a lot of time has passed, plus its director Pete Docter has no time to direct anymore since he's running that studio... I figured maybe a Disney+ series about other peoples' emotions, not just Riley's, could be a thing. But no, it's a full-blown sequel from a different director (Kelsey Mann), and it will explore Riley's teen years. Possibly risky subject matter for a PG-rated Pixar family movie, but TURNING RED tread similar waters just fine, though not without some puritanical backlash from the usual suspects.

Pixar tends to lock themselves in with these one-and-done stories that don't really, IMO, call for sequels. Like, I still can't imagine sequels to RATATOUILLE, WALL-E, and UP for starters, ditto COCO and SOUL. BRAVE would've been ideal for sequels, to me, if that movie hadn't been robbed from its originator Brenda Chapman. It's probably too late now to revive Princess Merida anyways. A Disney+ show is likely our best bet if any of us want to see more of her and the DunBroch kingdom. ONWARD, too, actually... But ONWARD didn't make much of a mark (it opening right before COVID-19's outbreak in the US notwithstanding), so there's that. LIGHTYEAR ends on a cliffhanger, but that movie flopped hard, so no sequel.

That leaves us with LUCA, whose director - Enrico Casarosa - seemed to imply that he wasn't against revisiting that story. LUCA was an incredibly popular streaming and merchandising title from what I understand, so I don't see why not? Maybe Casarosa will pursue another original movie and leave a sequel to another director, as INSIDE OUT 2 isn't being directed by Docter. Speaking of Docter... Andrew Stanton and Brad Bird likely aren't back for another round of FINDING NEMO or THE INCREDIBLES, respectively. Bird's off at Skydance, Stanton's trying to get live-action pictures off the ground. Stanton was setting FINDING DORY up to be directed by someone else, but after his JOHN CARTER OF MARS undeservedly flopped hard at the box office in 2012, he returned to Pixar to direct DORY himself. If a third FINDING movie gets off the ground somehow, he'll likely executive produce it. There have been rumors of a FINDING NEMO Disney+ show being a thing, maybe if it is a thing, they'll announce it in time for the original's 20th anniversary... A scary thought right there, FINDING NEMO turning 20 at the end of May... I was turning 11 when that was coming out.

As for THE INCREDIBLES, that all depends on whether Brad Bird signs off on a 3rd movie or not. Maybe Bird will stay at Skydance, depending on what goes on with RAY GUNN, a movie he's been wanting to make since the mid-1990s. RAY GUNN is interesting because it was supposed to be done for Turner Animation, but it got rejected sometime around Warner Bros.' acquisition of Turner. Bird instead took on THE IRON GIANT for Warner Animation. RAY GUNN likely didn't make it because it was always meant to be a PG-13-level sci-fi noir, a seedier animated tale than the usual... So there was no way that would've been made at Pixar, plus Bird really set his sights on a live-action project called 1906, which still has yet to happen. I can imagine him wanting to pursue all of those unmade movies he's always wanted to make, not another INCREDIBLES movie. I think what **could** happen is this... He writes, produces, and signs off on a third INCREDIBLES that someone else directs. I mean, it's not a terrible idea. TOY STORY and TOY STORY 2 were directed by John Lasseter, Lee Unkrich - editor of the first film and co-director on 2 - directed TOY STORY 3 all by himself and many felt that that film turned out fantastic. Josh Cooley directed TOY STORY 4, an admittedly divisive finale, but I really liked it and it can't be denied that it is a very well-made movie from a directing standpoint. Bird wrote and directed INCREDIBLES 2, but a lot of the all-knowing online league of cultured nerds declared that movie to be a letdown. I don't know, I really loved it myself. Whatever... Either an INCREDIBLES 3 happens, or a Disney+ series.

What ever may happen or be greenlit is anyone's guess, but that's a lot of dates to think about!

[fashion4standusers]

i hope this request isnt too out of left field, but do you have any references for piercing jewelry, preferrably multiple ear piercings? funny enough this is actually for me irl, as i intend to get more piercings done but most of the references i find are kind of, tame? and more dainty than i usually like. i like to go into things with at least some idea of a desired end result- but i get it if piercings or recent piercing photos squick you out too bad, or if you dont feel like this is close enough to your wheelhouse!

not my typical request but i like it! i personally don't have a problem with piercings/body mods but I'm gonna put everything under a cut here for the sake of any followers who might have issues with pictures and discussion of needles, piercing, and slightly more extreme procedures.

So, what you described is basically the majority of what i look at on pinterest! I am also currently working on my ear setup (in its infancy, admittedly, i only have double lobes and an industrial but i want to get waaaaay more when i have the time and money!) and i prefer really big, unique pieces over dainty/minimalist ones. Obviously, I'm no professional, so my word isn't gospel and you should ALWAYS do good research and consult a professional before you make any decisions, but i sure have ideas!

I'll get the really extreme one out of the way first and talk about coin slots, bc i'm obsessed with them. It's considered more of a body mod than a piercing because it's completed via cartilage removal and definitely not offered by every piercing studio (and it's actually illegal in some places, so REALLY do your research on this one!). I don't know if i can truly recommend it to you because of this, but if you find someone who knows what they're doing and you think you can handle it, i think it looks incredible. I'd LOVE to get one when I'm out of school and have the money!

(source)

(source)

I mentioned Pinterest but it's also worth checking out the subreddits (yeah yeah i know, reddit) for piercing and body mods-- the people there are usually professionals and enthusiasts so their taste is a bit more out there and unique than what you'll find on a google image search. If you search by popular -> all time you should be able to find the good stuff without sorting through all the text posts.

Other than that, I think the best I can do is give you some of the setups that I have saved for inspiration! it sounds like we have similar tastes so maybe i can interest you in what interests me :D since these are coming from pinterest the sourcing may not be perfect but I'll link you back to the pins themselves-- that way you can look at the related images and find even more ideas similar to the ones you like.

(link)

(link)

(link)

(link)

(link)

(link)

(link)

(link)

Also while i'm on the subject, i might as well share my experience getting an industrial piercing (the bar that goes across the upper cartilage of your ear like in the fourth pic) for anyone reading this who might be considering it :P For me, it did NOT hurt when it was happening and there was actually very little blood, BUT the pain set in after about 20-30 mins and the first 24 hours after that were a little gnarly in terms of pain, i had to pop a decent amount of ibuprofen. You have to be super careful with it for a long time and it'll easily take a year or longer to heal (i'm on 7 months). Even after months, it will hurt like a BITCH if you hit it/put pressure on it by accident (THINK TWICE WHEN YOU GO IN FOR A HUG WITH SOMEONE. I CANNOT STRESS THIS ENOUGH.) It's also probably best for people with short short hair because longer hair will get caught pretty often. With ALL that said, i do still really love the way it looks and I can't wait for it to be fully healed! I've wanted one since high school and it makes me happy that i finally got one. So, it's definitely worth it if you really want it BUT you should be aware that the healing process is NOT a walk in the park. Hopefully someone reading this was on the fence before and this helped them make a choice, who knows lol

[nerdythebard]

#15: Aphrodite, Goddess of Beauty

Umm... I, uh... t-this... ughhh...

You know what, let's just move on! (>///<)

Next Time: The true king of music comes in to bring the heat!

Now that we've got that embarrassing thing out of the way, let's... uh... see what we need to play as Aphrodite in D&D:

Soulmate Bond: While the concept itself is exploited to its core by fanfiction writers, here we need to focus our attention on our party members. We're the ultimate support. If we're close, they are better at doing... well... D&D things.

Sustainability: We might be offering our heart and soul to help our teammates, but we can't forget about ourselves. We won't be much help if we cannot survive.

The Power of Love Protects You: Aphrodite is a very good healer. Her Ultimate also grants temporary invulnerability to her soulmate. #LoveWins.

---

Despite being often viewed as "just a goddess of love", Aphrodite is an immensely powerful Elder Deity. Born directly from the Primordial being Ouranos, she is love and desire and passion; some of the most powerful forces that can drive a person to accomplish their goals... or to make them completely mad.

In D&D, however, we're going to make her a Protector Aasimar. We get +2 Charisma and +1 Wisdom, 60 feet of Darkvision, Celestial Resistance (which grants us resistance to radiant and necrotic damage), and we know how to speak Common and Celestial. Thanks to the Light Bearer feature, we know the Light cantrip, and because of Healing Hands, we can touch a creature and make them recover Hit Points equal to our overall level (once per long rest).

I think we can all agree that if Aphrodite was a character in D&D, she would be a total socialite. For that, let's modify the Noble background slightly, by swapping out History for Insight, keep the Persuasion proficiency, swap the proficiency with a gaming set into another language of our choice, and let's replace the Position of Privilege feature with a similar yet bit more useful Kept In Style from Sword Coast: Adventurer's Guide. This feature makes sure that whatever city we're in (it does say Waterdeep, but work with your DM on that one), our needs and desires are catered to and most expenses are sent to our family to deal with. Our name and family symbol might grand us (and our party members) discounts or straight-up free lodging and meals at a high-class festhall, and general approval from the middle class.

ABILITY SCORES

There is no doubt about it, Charisma is our top ability; we're the Goddess of Love and Desire, we need to flaunt it and charm people left and right. Wisdom is next, we may not look like it, but we're actually pretty resourceful and can read people quite well. Constitution is after that, all casters need Hit Points and yes, we're going to be a caster.

Dexterity is a little lower than I would like it to be (especially since SMITE Aphrodite doesn't use any armour), but we'll make it work later. Follow that up with Intelligence, we might seem like an occasional ditz and books are Athena's thing anyway. Finally, we'll dump Strength.

CLASS

Although there were several ways to make this build work (I was considering another Sorcerer multiclass), I've decided to use the recently-released stuff. We're going Cleric start-to-finish.

Clerics have a d8 for their Hit Dice, and they start with [8 + our Constitution modifier] initial Hit Points. They gain proficiency with light armour, medium armour, shields, and simple weapon. For Aphrodite, I would go with a quarterstaff (with a holy symbol attached to it) and studded leather armour. Clerics' saving throws are Wisdom and Charisma, and they get to pick two class skills (Medicine and Religion).

Level 1: Clerics start their D&D adventure by picking their subclass, their Divine Domain. There once was a leaked playtest material with the Love Domain subclass (which was later rebranded as Unity Domain), but with the release of Tasha's Cauldron of Everything it became the Peace Domain, and that's what we're using.

With the Implement of Peace feature, we gain proficiency in Performance. The Emboldening Bond feature lets us choose a number of creatures within 30 feet of us (including ourselves) equal to our proficiency bonus. For 10 minutes, all bonded creatures can roll a 1d4 and add the result to any attack roll, ability check, or saving throw they make... okay, so this is basically the Bless spell, but lasts longer and targets more creatures... Aphrodite, why are you so broken OP from the start?

Clerics also gain some Domain Spells, when they hit certain levels. Those spells do not count against the number of spells Clerics can prepare per day, and are always prepared:

Heroism imbues one creature we touch with bravery for 1 minute (concentration). For the duration, the creature is immune to being frightened and gains Temporary Hit Points equal to our casting ability modifier at the start of each of their turn. When the spell ends, all of the remaining THP are lost.

Sanctuary wards one creature within 30 feet of us against attacks for 1 minute. Any creature that attacks the spell's recipient must make a Wisdom saving throw. On a failed save, they must choose a different target or lose the attack (or spell). If the protected creature initiates an attack, a spell, or deals damage to anybody, the spell ends.

Besides those spells, we also get some from the Spellcasting feature. Clerics know cantrips, regular spells, and rituals. We start by picking three cantrips:

Guidance is a must-have for support players. It lasts for 1 minute (concentration), and it gives the creature we touch a 1d4 to add to their next ability check. The spell then ends.

Sacred Flame is probably the best source of radiant damage in the game. Target within 60 feet of us must make a Dexterity saving throw or suffer 1d8 radiant damage (damage increases as we level up).

Word of Radiance is a great way to handle swarms and multiple enemies. Each creature of our choice within 5 feet of us must make a Constitution saving throw or suffer 1d6 radiant damage (damage increases as we level up).

Clerics have access to their full spell list and prepare spells every day. The number of spells we can is [our Wisdom modifier + our Cleric level]. We are only restricted by the number and amount of spell slots. At the 1st level, we get two 1st-level spell slots:

Guiding Bolt creates a flash of light that targets one creature within 120 feet of us. On a successful hit, the target suffers 4d6 radiant damage, and the next attack roll made against it until the end of its next turn has an advantage.

Healing Word uses a bonus action to target one creature we can see within 60 feet of us and let them recover [1d4 + our spellcasting modifier] Hit Points. The healing increases by 1d4 for each spell slot higher than 1st-level.

Shield of Faith grants us (or a creature within 60 feet of us) a +2 AC bonus for 10 minutes (concentration).

Level 2: We gain one of the Cleric's signature skills - Channel Divinity. Once per short or long rest, we can become a conduit for the divine powers and perform one of the following effects:

Turn Undead: Each undead creature within 30 feet of us must make a Wisdom saving throw or be turned for 1 minute. A turned creature must spend its turn trying to move as far away as possible from us and cannot willingly move closer than 30 feet towards us.

Balm of Peace: CD effect granted to us by our Domain. As an action, we can move our full movement speed without provoking attacks of opportunity and when we move within 5 feet of any other creature while doing that, we can restore [2d6 + our Wisdom modifier] Hit Points to that creature.

We also get to learn one more spell: Protection from Evil and Good last for 10 minutes (concentration). Until the spell ends, one target we touch is protected against the following types of creatures: aberrations, celestials, elementals, fey, fiends, and undead. Creatures of those types have a disadvantage on attack rolls against the target. The target also can't be charmed, frightened, or possessed by them.

Level 3: We unlock 2nd-level spell slots here. Spiritual Weapon creates a manifestation of our deity's power (it can be a sceptre, a weapon, or even a comb or a giant lollipop). We can summon it as a bonus action within 60 feet and make melee attacks with it. On a successful hit, the target takes [1d8 + our spellcasting modifier] force damage.

Our Divine Domain also grants us two spells at this level:

Aid bolsters our allies' toughness and resolve. We choose up to three creatures within 30 feet of us. For the next 8 hours, each target's Hit Points and Hit Points Maximum increase by 5.

Warding Bond creates a connection between us and one creature within 60 feet of us for 1 hour. While the bonded target is within 60 feet of us, it gains a +1 to their AC and saving throws, and resistance to all damage. Unfortunately, if they take damage we suffer the same amount.

We also get a new racial feature: Radiant Soul. We can use our action to sprout a pair of luminous wings, which give us flying speed of 30 feet for 1 minute. Once per turn, we can also deal extra radiant damage (equal to our level) to an attack or a spell. This feature can be used once per long rest.

Level 4: Time for our first Ability Score Improvement. Let's raise our Wisdom and Constitution, to start rounding up those odd numbers.

Because we've increased our spellcasting ability, we can pick two spells here:

Hold Person forces a Constitution saving throw onto one (humanoid) target within 60 feet. On a failed save, the target is paralysed for 1 minute (concentration).

Calm Emotions does the opposite of what Aphrodite stands for, but it's nonetheless useful. The spell forces a Charisma saving throw onto all creatures within 20-foot-radius sphere (creatures can also choose to fail this throw). On a failed save, we get to select one of two effect: suppress the charmed or frightened status for 1 minute (concentration), or suppress a creature's hostile feelings for 1 minute (concentration).

We also learn a new cantrip: Spare the Dying helps a creature with 0 Hit Points to remain stable; the player doesn't have to make Death Saving Throws, but the character is still unconscious.

Level 5: Our Turn Undead gets an upgrade and becomes Destroy Undead. Starting at this level, when an undead of CR 1/2 or lower (skeletons, shadows, zombies, etc.) fails the saving throw against our Turn Undead, it gets destroyed instead.

We also unlock 3rd-level spell slots: Spirit Guardians create a flock of spectral protectors in a 15-foot radius centred on ourselves for 10 minutes (concentration). Creatures within the area have their speed halved and must make a Wisdom saving throw or take 3d8 damage (radiant if we're good or neutral, necrotic if we're evil; half damage on a successful save). We can select which creatures are unaffected by the spirits, and we can choose the form they appear as. For Aphrodite, I'd suggest doves since those are her sacred animals.

Our Divine Domain grants us two spells at this level:

Beacon of Hope lets us grant a number of creatures within 30 feet of us an advantage on Wisdom saving throws and Death Saving Throws for 1 minute (concentration). We also receive maximum healing from spells.

Sending allows us to put a telepathic message in the mind of a creature we've previously met (or seen, like in a photo). The message must be of 25 words or less, and the receiver is able to reply.

Level 6: Our Channel Divinity feature can now be used twice per short or long rest. We also gain a subclass feature: Protective Bond. The bonds we create help people protect each other. If a creature affected by our Emboldening Bond is about to take damage, any other bonded creature within 30 feet of them can use a reaction to teleport to their location and take all the damage instead.

For this level's spell, we'll go with Fast Friends. Using her divine beauty, Aphrodite can ensure people do her biddings without question.

Fast Friends lets us charm one humanoid within 30 feet of us that can hear and understand us. The target must succeed on a Wisdom saving throw or become charmed for 1 hour (concentration). While charmed, the creature will carry out any task and provide any service we ask if we do so in a friendly manner. Any task that might harm the target or conflicts with their morals requires another Wisdom saving throw. When the spell ends, the target realizes they were under a spell.

Level 7: We don't get anything class-related, but we do unlock 4th-level spells:

Death Ward grants one creature we touch immunity to death for 8 hours. When the target's Hit Points get reduced to 0, they come back to life with 1 Hit Point instead and the spell ends. The spell also protects from instant-kill effects, such as Power Word: Kill.

We also get more spells from our Divine Domain:

Aura of Purity creates an energy surge spreading 30 feet from us. Until the spell ends (10 minutes, concentration), non-hostile creatures within the aura cannot succumb to diseases, have resistance to poison damage, and gain an advantage against the following conditions: blindness, deafness, charmed, frightened, paralysed, poisoned, and stunned.

Otiluke's Resilient Sphere is our another attempt at Aphrodite's Invulnerability ability. The spell creates a bubble of force that surrounds a target within 30 feet of us. For 1 minute (concentration), nothing – spells, physical objects, or energy – cannot pass through the bubble, and the target inside cannot be harmed by anything. They can use their action to move the bubble up to half of their speed, a'la giant hamster ball.

Level 8: A lot happens to Clerics here. First off, we get another ASI; let's boost our Charisma and Dexterity. Next, our Destroy Undead now works against the undead with a CR of 1 or lower (spectres, ghouls, boneless, husks, etc.). We also learn another 4th-level spell: Banishment sends a creature within 60 feet of us into another plane of existence, provided the target fails its Charisma saving throw. The spell lasts for 1 minute (concentration) and has two outcomes, depending on where the banished target is from:

If the banished target is native to the plane of existence we're banishing it from, it gets transported to a demiplane prison and reappears in the same spot when the spell ends.

If the banished target is not native to the plane of existence we're banishing it from, we must keep the spell active for 1 minute for the banishment to be permanent.

Finally, we get another Divine Domain feature: Potent Spellcasting allows us to add our Wisdom modifier to the damage dealt by our Cleric cantrips.

Level 9: Once again, we don't get any new class upgrades, but we do unlock 5th-level spells:

Holy Weapon enchants a weapon we touch with divine energy. Until the spell ends (1 hour, concentration), the weapon emits a bright light for 30 feet and a dim one for another 30. Attacks made with the now blessed weapon deal extra 2d6 radiant damage and if the weapon is not magical, it becomes so for the duration.

We also receive our final Divine Domain spells:

Greater Restoration is a high-level healing spell that cures serious ailments, such as curses, status effects (charmed, exhaustion, petrification), loss of Maximum Hit Points, etc.

Rary's Telepathic Bond links together the minds of up to eight willing creatures for 1 hour. Until the spell ends, the creatures can communicate telepathically freely, regardless of distance (although they must be on the same plane of existence).

Level 10: We learn our last cantrip: Mending repairs some minor breaks and tears in objects we touch, such as broken key or a severed rope. The spell can mend a damage of up to 1 foot.

We learn Divine Intervention from our Domain. We call our deity for direct help, and roll percentile dice. If the result is equal to our Cleric level (or lower), the plea is successful and we receive help from our god (DM's interpretation. It can be a vision, a direct manifestation, a spell or an item useful for the request we make, etc.). If we do not succeed, we can try again after taking a long rest. If we succeed, we can try again after 7 days.

We also learn another 5th-level spells: Mass Cure Wounds creates a wave of healing energy that affects up to six creatures in a 30-foot-radius sphere appearing at a point of our choice within 60 feet of us. Each target regains Hit Points equal do [3d8 + our spellcasting ability].

Level 11: Our Destroy Undead now affects the undead with the CR of 2 and lower (ghasts, poltergeists, will-o'-wisps, etc.).

We unlock 6th-level spells here. Word of Recall allows us to teleport us and up to five willing creatures within 5 feet of us to a pre-established sanctuary to our deity.

Level 12: Time for another ASI! This time, let's raise our Dexterity and Constitution.

Planar Ally allows us to summon an otherworldly helper directly from our deity's entourage. The creature can be a celestial, a fey, or a fiend loyal to us, although it is under no compulsion to carry out orders. It will also demand payment for its services.

Level 13: We unlock 7th-level spells at this level.

Temple of the Gods is the divine version of Mordenkeinen's Magnificent Mansion, but with less furnishings. We create a temple within 120 cubic feet space for 24 hours, and designate creatures who can freely enter it. Undesignated creatures may try to breach the temple, but have to succeed on a Charisma saving throw. If they manage to enter the temple, they are hindered by divine magic; each attack roll and saving throw carries a 1d4 penalty to their overall result. The spell cannot be cancelled by Dispel Magic or Antimagic Field.

Level 14: Our Destroy Undead feature now affects the undead with the CR of 3 and lower (wights, vampiric mists, mummies, etc.)

Since we've skipped Revivify, now is a good chance to have a resurrection-type spell. Resurrection brings back a target that's been dead for no more than a century (that isn't undead and didn't die of old age). The spell neutralizes poisons and diseases, closes wounds and regenerates missing body parts; it does not, however, remove curses. The resurrected character takes a -4 penalty to all of their attack rolls, skill checks, and saving throws; each long rest reduces the penalty by 1.

Level 15: We don't get anything here, just 8th-level spells:

Antimagic Field creates a zone (10-foot-radius sphere) in which no magic can exist for 1 hour (concentration). Summoned creatures disappear, magical items become mundane, spells cannot be cast. Magical effects (charmed and frightened conditions, etc.) except ones coming from artefacts and/or deities are suppressed.

Level 16: Time for an ASI! Let's put one point into Constitution and one into Dexterity.

Holy Aura radiates from our body up to 30 feet for 1 minute (concentration). Any creature within range that we choose is also sheds the same light in 5 feet radius of them and have advantage on all saving throws, and other creatures have disadvantage on attack rolls against them until the spell ends. If by chance a fiend or an undead attacks us, it has to make a Constitution saving throw or be blinded until the spell ends.

Level 17: Our Destroy Undead reaches its peak potential and now affects the undead with the CR of 4 or lower (ghosts, banshees, flameskulls, etc.)

We also get our final Domain feature: Expansive Bond. The benefits of our previous Bonds now work for creatures within 60 feet of each other. Moreover, if a creature uses Protective Bond to take somebody else's damage, they have a resistance to that attack.

We finally unlock 9th-level spells. Mass Heal affects any number of creatures within 60 feet of us and restores up to 700 Hit Points, divided as we choose. The creatures are also healed of all diseases and blindness and deafness effects are removed.

Level 18: We can now use our Channel Divinity feature three times per rest.

We take a few step back with spells and take the 7th-level Divine Word. We choose any number of creatures within 30 feet of us and force a Charisma saving throw on them. On a failed save, the creatures suffer an effect based on their current number of Hit Points:

50 or fewer: deafened for 1 minute

40 or fewer: deafened and blinded for 10 minutes

30 or fewer: deafened, blinded, and stunned for 1 hour

20 or fewer: killed instantly

Regardless of their Hit Points, a celestial, a fiend, or a fey is additionally sent back to its native plane of existence and cannot return for 24 hours (unless via Wish spell).

Level 19: Time for our final ASI. Let's get that Dexterity up again and... I dunno, maybe Strength? Doesn't change much, but it's better than having an odd number for more important stats.

Now... in case the theme of this build hadn't been clear before

And the 9th-level healing spells are absolute monsters. Power Word: Heal restores all Hit Points of one creature we touch. It removes charmed, frightened, paralysed, and stunned conditions, and if the creature is knocked prone, it doesn't waste its movement to get up.

Level 20: Our capstone is Cleric 20, which grants us probably one of the strongest endgame abilities: Divine Intervention Improvement. From this point onwards, our Divine Intervention always succeeds. We don't need to roll for it, although the 7-days limit is still present.

For our final spell of the build, we get True Resurrection. We can bring back a creature that's been dead for no more than 200 years and hadn't died of old age. The spell restores all of their Hit Points, closes wounds, removes poisons and diseases, and even lifts curses. It can even make a new body for the willing soul, if the old one's gone.

---

And that is it. Aphrodite, the protective Goddess of Beauty. Let's see how well (or not) we've made her:

First off, and this should come as no surprise, we're a support character. We have a plethora of healing and protection options, and our charms could help us and our party members to avoid conflict. We have the AC of 15, 133 Hit Points on average, and a +3 to our initiative.

Unfortunately, this build has a few downsides: we're don't have many damage-dealing abilities, with the most prominent being our cantrips. Also, we're pretty useless against creatures immune to being charmed. Our Intelligence is also not great, so those saving throws could be trouble.

---

Anyway, another deity off the list. I hope you guys enjoy yourselves with these builds. I'll see you next time!

- Nerdy out!

[multifandom-girlie]

𝐅𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠

Imagine requested by @theshyprincess : You take his virginity

Pairing: MG x Vampire!Reader

Warnings: smut

Disclaimer: I am not supporting minor and adult relationships but for the purpose of readers backstory, we are allowing it. Especially considering that is basically what all the shows are about if you think about it. Also I have nothing against MG but I just thought it would be a surprise to not have them dating. Also I thought the idea of the boy being the Virgin is a little more unique considering all stories I've read for this particular request are all girls having their virginity taken, so I thought I'd be different. Also the age of reader isn't completely known to me but I wanted her dating Kol when she was 16 and since they dates for 3 years she must be 19 but I'm not sure if you can stay longer at the Salvatore school unlike normal school. Hope you enjoy !

Since I started the school, Milton's always had a little crush on me but of course me growing up and developing into a women only intensified that crush and here we are. He's not a bad person but I haven't ever seen him in the way he wants me to. But of course he asked me to the back to school dance Lizzie thought would be a good idea to through and of course I couldn't say no. See a few weeks ago, he wouldn't have even dates asking me considering my ex boyfriend is not only and older more intimidating man, not just a vampire but a Mikaelson. Yup, you did hear that right. It wasn't supposed to happen but it did.

See Hope was going home to New Orleans to visit all her family at Christmas around 3 years ago and since I didn't have anywhere to go she invited me. So I went with her met her family and everyone was really nice, but her uncle Kol was particularly nice to me. We were only meant to be staying until the 28th of December and then going back home but Hope was convinced to stay till New Years by her Uncle...Kol. So there we were New Years in New Orleans, drinking champagne. The countdown began, Kol and I were stood in the back and three bottles of champagne had been shared between us both alone. It didn't take long for him to make his move that night, 5 minutes after midnight we were both intoxicated, horny, hot and naked. The amount of times it happened that night, without us giving a care in the world. That was what most of our relationship was like, but I'm afraid it got to careless and he cheated on me with a girl called Davina. He tried apologising but I wasn't hearing any of it, three years down the drain because of lack of loyalty and a bottle of white.

So here we are present day, 20 minutes before the dance and crying into my pillow. Just because I wouldn't hear Kol out doesn't mean the thought of him isn’t heart-wrenching. I pulled away from the pillow, praising myself for using waterproof mascara accidently. I walked to the mirror ran my fingers through my hair, wiped the fresh tears off my face and straightened out my dress. I walked out the door and locked it behind me, walked down the hall and down the stairs to the big hall, where the dance was. I pushed the mahusive brown door away from me and walked into the hall, MG greeted me at the bottom and led me to the middle of the floor.

He grabbed ahold of my waist and hand and started swaying us to the music.

“Look y/n I know that your probably heart-wrenching about breaking up with Kol, so this is the only time I'll mention it but I am sorry. Even if it worked in my favour.”

I looked at him, tears pooling in my eyes. I don’t want to tell him I can't see him that way but I have too eventually, so it might aswell be now.

“MG look. You are the sweetest man I've ever met and your funny and incredibly handsome and any girl would be lucky to have you, but I don't see you like that. I think your amazing but it's going to take me a while for this Kol thing to blow over and I can't give you hope for something to happen when it's more than likely it won't. I appreciate you asking me to the dance and always being there for me but we aren't ever going to date MG, I am sorry.”

He looked down at the ground a gripped me tighter. He looked back into my eyes. 

“Eh it was a long shot anyway. It just sucks that you don't feel that way about you, I don't think you quite realise how much I do really like you.”

I smiled slightly and looked him the eyes, I giggled slightly before I spoke.

“What you mean, when you spend hours getting Josie to teach you how to bake everytime I'm upset so you can bring me some food? when you sprain your wrist getting Lizzie to teach you how to dance to impress me? when you sit in your room crying to yourself when you think about me with someone else? when you blackmailed Kaleb into teaching you how to fight property so you could protect me ? I do see all of this Milton and I've tried so hard to feel the same way, it makes me the only girl who wouldn't fall for it. But at the end of the day, would you not rather have me as a really good friend and never lose me or date me, something goes wrong and then we never speak again.”

He had tears in his eyes and he decided to twirle me.

“You saw all that ? I guess I would rather never lose you.”

We looked deeply into each other's eyes and grinned.

“Okay so we can either continue dancing and be boring or go steal Ric's bourbon and Emma's red ?”

He laughed and dragged me out the hall. We snuck into Alaric's office and grabbed the drinks we then took ourselves to Emma's office and stole her brand new, very tasty, expensive bottle of red. 

Around 1 hour later, we were waltzing around the halls together with empty bottles in our hands and stumbling into everything around us. We then heard Alaric calling us from round the corner so we opened a cupboard and slotted ourselves in. It was the janitors closet, so I watched through the grates in the door so find Alaric. He was looking around completely clueless and I was silently laughing until I realised how close in proximity me and Milton were. The fact that we were intoxicated probably didn't help. His member swiftly brushed against my behind and turned me on more than I realised. His hands travelled down my waist and his mouth did the same but to my neck. His warm breath fanned on my neck.

“We might be safer in here, away from innocent minds and prying eyes.”

His big soft lips brushed against my neck and my eyes rolled back. I suddenly sobered a little but he wasn't completely with it. I turned around so we were facing eachother and his member was definetely an important factor in the conversation now.  

“Milton, honey... have you ever done this before ?”

He shook his head and still continued his movements. Points to the guy for confidence, seriously. I mean what's the worst that could happen, I can't get pregnant because I'm a vampire and he's drunk anyway so he wont't remember that it even happened. I'm still not entirely sure I will yet.

I lifted my dress up and kissed him roughly.

OUTFIT

He pulled away from the kiss.

“Wait stop. Just before we do this... you looked really beautiful tonight.”

I smiled at him in awe and kissed him again.

“Thankyou Milton.”

I ripped the buttons of his shirt and kissed down his chest down to the waistband. He started breathing really heavily.

“Milton, calm down.”

He nodded and slowed his breathing. I smiled and undid his belt and slipped his trousers down. His buldge prominent through his black boxers. I used my hand to stroke his clothed member whilst placing little kisses around his man region. His eyes started to close with pleasure so I ripped his boxers off and flicked my tounge out to collect the pre cum dripping from his tip. His breathing started to quicken as I took his whole cock into my and swirled my tounge around it as I did. His tip collided with the back of my throat and already his dick was already throbbing. I jumped back up before he came and I kissed him passionately. He grabbed my throat and pinned me against the wall.

“I’m okay with teasing but that was too far. Let's see how you like it.”

He lifted me up and ripped my panties off. He held me on the wall and thrusted his cock into me with no warning. It was a very surprising gift. He kept doing it until I was just about to cum, he pulled out and kissed me. We made out for a couple of minutes and he then lifted me higher and stuck his face in between my legs and stuck his tounge straight into my entrance. I was nearly at my peak again when he pulled away.

“Okay Milton, I've learned my lesson. Just please let me come.”

He lowered me into his dick once again and my orgasm was fast approaching. As soon as he's finished his fourth thrust, I released all over his cock. Squirting into his stomach and my legs. He started to rub my clit and I squirted even more. I couldn't handle the pleasure. It was overstimulation at it's finest.

I jumped down with a grin on my face and pulled my dress back over my head. Milton was putting his suit back on before he spoke up.

“The no panties thing was lucky wasn’t it. It's like you knew it was going to happen.”

I laughed and shook my head, I opened the door.

“Don’t get to cocky Milton. It wasn't for you Kol was meant to be coming tonight and whether I forgave him or not, I've been super horny all day. I needed some release and I knew he would give it to me.”

He laughed with me and he walked me back to my room, where there was a surprise waiting for me.

“Kol?!”

He looked at me in horror and walked into my room slamming the door behind him.

“Milton thank you for tonight, it was great. But I need to make sure he doesn't go rouge.”

He smiled and I left him alone. I walked into my room and I'm telling you, i'm dead meat.

Tags: @akshi8278 @theshyprincess

 MASTERLIST

[pbandjesse]

We just got home from ice skating. Where i had a blast. And then as soon as we left i felt so bad i thought i was going to be sick in the car. I have a splitting headache right now. Sucks.

In general though today was great. I slept alright last night. And felt okay when I got up. I had my doctors appointment this morning so at 930 i left here and got there with plenty of time. Another day of driving in the rain.

The appointment was very good though. The nurse thought my goose purse was hilarious. And she was just really nice. The doctor had this funny headband with a mirror on it. Like classic cartoon Dr. And he really listened to me and made me feel validated. He numbed my nose and throat cauterized my nose. Hopefully no more nose bleeds but we'll have to see. He asked me a few times if i did coke because my nose was so jacked up. Like he kept asking. It was bad enough that he sent me for an x-ray to make sure that something else wasn't happening. Wild. Mostly he told me that if my nose bleeds for more then 20 minutes to go to the emergency room and to use saline spray 5 times a day.

We talked for a bit about how bad i feel all the time. And he really just said that it is probably a side effect from my psoriasis. Because it is an autoimmune disease. That even if all my tests look normal something could go crazy at random. And we just have to wait and see.

He sent me for blood work and that chest x-ray once we were done talking. And those both went super quick. I have never had an x-ray in my life and now I have had two in one year. Wild.

I was feeling kind of off after. But not to bad. So i decided to go to the savers and the goodwill. I had a fun time just looking around but i did get some gifts and i just enjoyed looking. I also got a set of small organizing drawers and a wooden house and a neat button down shirt dress and a cashmere sweater. It's so soft.

I had taco bell in the middle of those two store. Drove around for a little. Got bread. Tried to find a place to smell men's cologne but they were all sealed shut. Annoying.

I went to an ulta though and was able to smell $100 sprays that i didn't even like that much. And then over to the five below where i had a little bit of better luck. Well see how that works out.

I made it home before 230. I put everything away. Wrapped my presents. And laid down.

I watched videos. Enjoyed sweetp's company. And waited for James to come home.

Once the sun was down James was here. And once i got dressed we headed out for dinner.

We had some really great pizza and talked about out church upbringing and how different they were.

We went skating after a walk to a bar to get cash. And i had a great time. I was able to do some of my tricks. My cross overs are kind of weak but i could do a lot. I worked on teaching James some and even had some teenaged girls become my students for the night. It was fun. And i just had a really good time.

It was the best I've felt in a while. And i was bummed i felt so bad after. But it made me really want to get back into sports. So on the way home i signed up for a circus class. So January 2nd i will be taking that. See if i want to do that again. Since there aren't any adult skating classes i can take. I'm still going to try to get out to skating every week. Best i can. It just makes me so tired it can be hard on those middle of. The day slots but I'll try my best.

I hope you all have a great night. I have a PD tomorrow morning and then that fund-raising event thing at blick and then me and James are going to try to see some model trains for Christmas. I hope it's just a really nice day.

Sleep well. Be safe out there.

[eponymous-rose]

Weird question, but you seem really productive despite seeming to have a constantly fluctuating routine, with both your work and your hobbies. Most people think having a solid routine is the only way to increase your productivity but I've pretty much given up on having a routine since my life seems similar to yours--a lot of travel, weird and always changing work hours. Do you have any advice on how you deal with routine and productivity in spite of that?

Oh gosh, this is definitely something I struggle with a LOT, and I’m not sure I’ve found a coping strategy that works for me yet. But the small things that have been helping have been (1) keeping a routine in my planning even if the stuff I do changes dramatically (even if I’m traveling, I have a notebook where, every Sunday, I list all the stuff that has specific dates/times for the following week, I list the stuff where I still have to come up with a date/time, and I list the stuff I’ve gotta do that week for sure), and (2) finding multiple ways to approach the same goals that I can tailor to my level of energy/spare time on any given week (so this week I’m just not in a super exercisey mindset and can’t rely on having the motivation to run every day, but instead I’m making an extra effort not to eat out this week—lower-effort for my current state of mind, but all toward the same goal of feeling a bit healthier overall).

I’m also very cognizant of how little time at work is actually spent working, so I try not to feel guilty if the total number of hours worked is low as long as the work’s getting done. I’m an incredibly routine-oriented person, but it’s been a bit freeing to slowly and steadily teach myself that stuff just has to get finished one way or another, and the easiest way to do that is to just focus on specific goals and let the rest be flexible.

Anyway, yesterday I was thinking of this ask and was like, “You know, I’ll just write up what I do on Monday as an example, and I bet things will go hilariously awry.” And so they did.

So here’s what my weekly planning list looked like last night:

Dated Events:

Call with paper coauthor at 9AM Monday

Call with leadership academy planning committee at 10AM Monday

Call with peer mentoring group at 9AM Tuesday

Sit in on class at 11:30AM Tuesday and Thursday

Seminars Wednesday at 3PM, Thursday at 4PM, and Friday at 3PM

D&D Saturday at 6PM

Undated Events:

Coordinating abstract submission for an upcoming conference (early week)

Setting up Skype calls with a couple friends I haven’t talked to in a while (late week)

Assorted Priorities:

Book hotel for work travel in July

Accept journal article review request and scope out how long that’ll take

Review some materials sent out for my peer mentoring call

Revise my paper and submit the revisions before the Monday deadline

Get my driver’s license renewed (the joys of yearly visa renewal… your license has to be renewed yearly as well)

Put together a schedule for a biweekly Twitter feature highlighting new publications for the account I run for a subcommittee in my field

Respond to an e-mail about a conference in January about some weird deadline that popped up for next week

Come up with conference abstract ideas before the as-yet-unscheduled meeting

Fill out some action items in advance of my 10AM Monday call

And some more specific checklists for four research projects I’m focusing on this week

I purposely try to group conference calls together, because I currently share my office and feel weird doing video calls when she’s stuck in frame five feet away from me while she tries to work. So Monday seems like a good day to work from home, and I can squeeze in Tuesday’s call before heading to the office that morning. I’ll be in the office Tuesday-Friday, which means I’ll be able to attend those seminars and classes with no problem. I have most of my D&D prep done already because we ended early last game, so I can leave that until Saturday. The only thing I might have to shuffle to next week is the driver’s license thing, because it’ll take three hours and I have to account for finding a Lyft there and back. Okay. Aces.

Wake up this morning to find my internet’s out, and I also somehow left the hard drive with all my research on it at work. Hoo boy. But staring over my to-do list, I think I can set today up as a “big picture” day and not have to do any actual coding, so I’m still okay to work from home. I can also phone in to the conference calls instead of using the video call software. All good.

Luckily, the internet comes back right before my first call of the day. Said call is with someone who also happens to be a dean, so she has a tendency to get held up at meetings, so I take that delay to look at the action items for my second call (I mean… if you send me action items at 8PM on a Sunday I am not gonna touch them until Monday morning).

When she did make it online, we chatted about the new paper, and she strongly encouraged me to send it to our other coauthors in case they have suggestions. We’re submitting on Monday, which is way too short-notice to read a 20-page research paper, but they already read the pre-revision version in great detail, so I shot them an e-mail that included a summary of the substantial changes and a note to the effect that if any of them want more time to look at this stuff, I can beg the editor for an extension on their behalf. Minor crisis averted.

Second meeting is very intense and structured. Everyone has to volunteer to organize and lead two webinars in the next three months, so I go ahead and volunteer for the two April ones so I’ll get it out of the way early. Aaand the first webinar is at 1PM this Friday. Okay. I’ll work from home that morning so I can do last-minute prep, then head into the office in time for the 3PM seminar. No biggie. One organizer puts together a draft schedule, and I send a quick e-mail suggesting a different use of one of the ten-minute time slots. One of the other organizers requests another conference call tomorrow instead of e-mails. I tell them I can only do after 4PM, if I leave work early. Eh. We’ll see how that works out.

After the call, I get through a bunch of small tasks in maybe 20 minutes: hotel booked, Twitter posts prepped, review request accepted (not due until May 20, so plenty of time on that), conference deadline e-mail chain started. I spend the rest of the time before noon getting sucked into an article someone sent me about the myths surrounding undergraduate grade inflation and then reading up on the peer mentoring materials for our call tomorrow. A couple other minor e-mails pop up (scheduling the precise date of a conference mixer in January, that kind of thing) and I manage to deal with them right away.

Lunch! Clearly working from home means I should take the opportunity to indulge in some fine cuisine, some leisurely cooking that highlights—

I heat up a microwave meal (chicken couscous) and watch YouTube videos for an hour.

Back in it! I write up some abstract submission ideas and make a valiant attempt at setting up a time to talk about them, but it looks like that might have to wait until next week. We’re still a ways before the deadline, so that’s okay.

Mmmmmmm someone on Twitter mentions a conference in Germany in September and a workshop in Colorado in July that both look like a good fit for my research. I’m in a situation where I have a big chunk of travel funding that’s going to disappear unless it gets spent in the next year. Oh no. But also oh yes.

Just in case, I put together a couple point-form ideas for stuff to propose that I can bring to the people holding the purse strings.

The rest of the afternoon is spent putting together weekly goals for four of my research projects: each one involves a collaboration with a different person, so I’d like to be able to send each of them an e-mail with at least one new thing to share about that project this week. Just in case that doesn’t happen, though, I rank them from most to least important. Worst-case scenario, I don’t have to send any of them this week, but it’ll make next week tougher if I don’t.

It’s only about 3:30 at this point, but honestly, I’m feeling a bit exhausted and overwhelmed (some of the e-mail chains have gone through five or six replies at this point and keeping it all straight is giving me a headache), so I opt to get some groceries and call it a day.

I may have added some stuff, but I got a lot crossed off today! Here’s how that last checklist looks at the end of the day:

Assorted Priorities:

Revise my paper and submit the revisions before the Monday deadline

Project #1: come up with a new exploratory figure and send to Person A.

Project #2: summarize the early results I started last week and send to Person B, along with an ask to see whether he’d be up for me presenting this stuff in Europe in November.

Project #3: improve on figures I showed last month and send to Person C.

Project #4: prepare a rough outline of the next paper to send to Person D.

Not having my work hard drive means I was able to just focus on the stuff that wasn’t specific to research today. In all the chaos of today, I’ve set myself up well for a research-heavy rest of the week where I (hopefully) won’t have to worry about non-research stuff or big changes to the schedule and can just burrow into research, emerging for occasional seminar/webinar breaks. A good Monday, all around.

[celisgettacos]

I'm going to post this because maybe someone will hear this over words unspoken, my name is Billy Strange and I still wake up each morning picking up the next piece, I've almost taken my life more then I can count on both hands, from a high school sweet heart marriage of 9 years turned bloody and a custody battle that went from healthy to sadistic over a span of 3 years and 20k, and it was the words from a man I barely knew for no more then 6 months, that has saved me

I see and talk to so many fathers who tell me their story and I so badly want to tell them just to listen to what I'm telling you, I can get you out of this if you just let me a stranger walk with you through it... It never works out that easy but I don't give up and I hope you all read these words and share them to those who may hear it better from the words written by their brother in arms.. any way

I look back for those 2 years I was there and remember pushing anyone close to me as far away as possible so that they didn't have to feel the initial pain or try to stop me, all because I felt like I let them all down...

The only people I kept around me were strangers because I wanted to know if they seen me as a failure not even knowing me.... It was because of that, and them being completely honest about why it was only me that maybe it wasn't meant to be,

(A Satanist told me this and I'll never forget it, it was his words that allowed me to get this far) he is not one for recognition so I won't label him.

"did you ever think that your trying so hard to hold up a world that has fallen all around you...

Maybe you are on the right path and you are only focusing on the things that have already broken, and don't realize that all you have to do is look down at each piece, see it and learn why it was so important to you and then glue it to that small piece you are still holding above you, then go to the next and keep going until each piece has shown you just how strong it actually made you to make it to someone who seen your strength, and can see you just forgot what gave you that strength.

It will hurt, it will make you hate the way you handled certain things, it will cause you to try to give up,

but because you made it a task to see each piece, and put it all back up, you will never allow yourself to give up, or find a rope, until you complete your task, because thats the person you are...

But you have to understand that it may have taken you 5 years to build that first world you now see broken below you, it will take far longer to rebuild it stronger, because you will also rebuild yourself with each piece, and you have to remember to let each piece's glue dry before placing the other or else you will watch it become to stressful and not understand why you think you are doing the right thing but it keeps falling....

Learn each piece then let it hurt, while you hold it in place to dry, let it consume your mind and play it over and over like a movie each piece until it dries, then heal, smile before you look back down for that next piece, and don't ever be scared to place even those bad things you did when not everyone was watching back into your rebuild, because without each piece it will be to weak and fall apart down the road when everything seemed good.

Basically you have to accept that you are on a dark road but to learn to see in the dark it will allow you to navigate later in life when you see a person on that same road and they ask for help.. Don't ever forget how you felt because they may have absolutely no one and will you want to be the one who pretends like you didn't see it. Anyway that being said stop mopping and let's go handle business "

The next section is a completely separate chapter from above but I feel maybe can help...

I want to add to this 4 years from that being told to me and experiencing it in real life, that sometimes you will still find yourself in a sort of limbo period I've managed to pin mine down to about every 8 months, if for some reason I didn't accomplish a goal I set prior and it feels like no matter what I do or try I can't for some reason figure it out, those are the moments you need to find a person you trust your life with because those will be the moments you will try anything to get you out of that mentality because we want to feel that we are moving forward no matter the speed, but to feel stuck and not being able to see a way out or that lost piece that you know is there it's just probably hidden under some of your other pieces..we feel like Maybe just for a moment let whatever is causing you to panic, whether it's rent, a car that is broke and no money and work tomorrow, or you've been jobless for 3 months now and even with all the resumes submitted nothing is available and winter is a cold time to be homeless with no job, or maybe you still haven't got a place to stay so that you can have your children stay with you finally, whatever it is the worst thing that can happen is what you silently keep fighting to not take over,

I just want this fight to stop for one night, I just want all this stress to burry itself tonight so I can try to breathe... What that really means is I'm going to go back to those bad habits I had because it always quieted those fights in my head and if I can just do that I will have a clear mind to find a solution..

I will tell you from experience that once you reach that moment nothing but a person of trust will stop you from taking that hit, or drinking those shots, calling that sexual excitement, spending the money you don't have on the gambling machines, going out on the town with the sole purpose of getting wasted, because we truly believe that we are better prepared to control our vices, we will stop at our limit, what we never realize is that we allowed those vices to retake control by thinking you needed it to breathe.

What will ultimately usually happen is a night of uncontrolled guilt, constant war inside yourself, conscious tears filling up your emotional warhead..

all night this rage of self doubt quietly destroying your confidence, causing you to go right on past that limit of 2 shots, or just one line, or I'll only put 20 bucks in the slots, or I will just flirt I won't allow it to go past that,

because that fight is still loud and now more painful, because you know deep down that you allowed yourself to fall and laying there helpless...I cringe even writing these next words because it's so easy to reach this point of thinking that;

"obviously we were just meant to fail"

"why not right, "

"who really cares if I fail there's, no one here to stop me right..."

"So why should I have to carry this pain all the damn time, why is it so fucking easy for everyone else..."

And that's it...

(Those of you who are reading this and may be in this exact moment please, look at that image that you always hold in your mind of your child's eyes, look at that past moment when you and your daughter would lay under the stars with her head on your shoulder watching the magical pink elephant jump through a black sky as she explains how much she loves you and talks about anything and everything that her imagination creates under that massive sky where imagination always comes to life.... Feel her heart as she paints her masterpiece and ask you to help with the flowers over there by the big dipper so the elephant has something to give her mom,

please don't let your moment die because you have no more left, and no one in your face to help you, please call me I don't know you but I will before we hang up and I won't let you fail the only mission that will keep your children's smile alive for another year because you didn't let yourself fall.)

Cont. - don't Wake up the next day or still awake 12 hours later after all those "friends" left you to sit with your own guilt... Oh yeah, that guilt is now yelling loudly inside your entire soul, as it launches that emotional warhead of tears, oh yeah those evil people why did they let me do this....

Why did they... Urrrghhhhh why did I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I,... DO this I can't believe I went back to what destroyed me and actually talked myself into believing this was going to help me....

It's in those tears and self reflection comes a choice that is now forced on you, oh hold that thought your friend from last night is calling, and they want to know if you want to continue this "unhealthy" adventure..

You either respond with a yes and have accepted that you have lost your control, and most times it will set you back 3-6 months or until your money runs out or those "friends" hurt you. And then you realize that all you did was take on more hurt and more pain and that's a scenario that will most likely continue to lead to occasional loss of all reality until you find that piece of your life that you keep looking over and afraid to pick up, and will cause your life to end up in constant downfalls until addressed.

Or you will have addressed that guilt and conquer a small war by not answering, because you are very In tune with accepting responsibility and able to understand that you could have destroyed your life, someone else's life, and now you know that you still are not able to control those periods of limbo when nothing is working. So accept responsibility for any loses you may have encountered, like a drug test at work, or a piece of your dignity, or people you thought were friends...

The first step from that is to immediately have the talk with that person you know will hold you accountable during those periods, 9 out of 10 times that person is who you looked up to as a child whether it's your mom, dad, grandparent, or sibling, for me it was my grandmother.. The moment you can go to them honestly no matter what it was that you did the night before, you have to let them know what that is, you have to be able to openly label the thing that will destroy you, and let them know how important they are to your strength, those tears from that conversation will build a mountain of motivation inside of you... Usually sparking that jolt to get you over that limbo...

Some people can afford to pay those people to help them, for the rest of us we have each other so that's my little piece of advice I hope it helps someone

[whimsically-ominously-auspice]

Y'all getting tortured too..I lost it. I couldn't handle it

I got germ x on a cotton round and started washing my face.

I got more body parts to literally scrub

After my grandpa died of cancer -- well. Denise killed him but they said it was the cancer...

I took a shower and scrubbed my body every day. I got a new toothbrush weekly.

I used a scouring pad from the kitchen and I didn't ever turn the cold water knob but just a tiny stream.

The water was all the way on full blast hot.

I scoured my skin off.

My Uncle Dad took me to the hospital when he finally came home from the ship. It finally docked.

Doctor asked had I burned myself. "No I just took shower and it just didn't feel clean.. It never feels clean"

"How hot is the shower?"

"Oh will the way hot. I turn the cold on slightly about midway to do the final rinse"

"How long do you shower for and how many times do you perform a "rinse"?"

"Well the shower stays on... I'd say 3 - 4 times when it's all the way hot then at least twice, so about 6.. Sometimes 10.. 12... 45 one day"

I heard my uncle dad sob from the corner. I looked st him perplexed. Cause I was doing right. I was keeping the germs off me.

"I just gotta stay clean dad" as he raised his head he sucked in air through his nose. And i saw a man in misery and guilt

"I'm so sorry sorry i thought you could handle the cancer. I thought you'd be okay and i just had ti fo to work but she...."

"I can handle the cancer dad. I just gotta stay clean and keep the germs off of me"

"What kind of products do you use. SOS pads... Denise doesn't buy a lot of Shampoo so i try to keep,that for my hair... So I'll use dish soap or sometimes even laundry. Bleach is good but she doesn't buy that one slot either. I don't like the amoniea. The smell bothers me but I had to use it 3 or 4 times because I didn't have anything else but that was when i found the SOS pads under the sink. Lo and behold they have soap in them already. So, i quiet using extra except when i wash my face with them. Soften the skin up a little bit more than so I don't get wrinkles"

I looked dead into his eyes and told something I didn't tell any other adult about what i did. I told my friends... But not in a way that it was me. "You know someone i heard of was...." Not I did this. But someone did.

My dad according to my DNA4U although there's,a story about that...

He was in the corner crying the whole time I was talking. "No she needs help. I need help for her."

The doctor said they had received a phone call he thought it was from the FBI. But he looked at his notepad and said "Nope the CIA."

"I just have to keep the germs off me tell them that. They need to, too"

"I'm calling them Billy don't you worry"

"Yeah" he said into the phone "i got a situation here. I'm gonna need you to come in and take her. ... Mental ward"

Son of a bitch. I attacked him. I wasn't crazy. I needed to be germ free.

I grabbed the phone "WHAT I NEED IS TO BE CLEAN AND YOU DO TOO GODDAM THE WHOLE WORLD"

And i beat that poor doctor in the head and back wirh that phone until it fell apart and nothing was left.

"And that's how I kill germs" I told his dead body.

Mental institution?!?! ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?!? THE GERM INFESTATIONS I WOULD DIE IMMEDIATELY JUST BREATHING THE AIR!!! NO WAY IN HELL!!! GOD FUCKING NO!!!

My dad just sat there as i beat the doctor to death m his eyes and jaw open as wide as can be.

"You understand right? I'm not here to hurt you but This place it's so dirty but i came here with you. Because i trust you to keep me safe. But he wouldn't. Not. The dirtiest place in the world he would send me to and i just can't have that. I'll push the panic button to get you some help that you need"

It was right by the door. So these big ass mother fucking dudes came me in started grabbing me to hold me down and strap me to the bed. Big mother fuckers HUGE. Body builders and shit. "ARE YOU GERM FREE!! DONT GET A HOLD OF ME!! LET ME GO. GODDAMINIT!!!!!!!!!!!!"

I killed all 3. "Now i gotta wash my hands and arms. They fucking touched my face and every thing. Stuck thier fingers in my mouth and all. I need to,start with bleach. Can you get me some?"

My dad was in shock.

"Maybe later. I'll ask you again when your nervous system calms down" I washed my face and elbows.

It was 1992 Christmas was a few weeks away. My lie age I was 12. My real age I was only 8.

Finally the CIA came in "are you here to help or force me to wash my hands again?"

He put his arms up as he walked by me and sat next to my dad "well i know Gaberiel and Calvin can help. Gaberial goes to school with her and he said she looks alright but seems to be in a trance like state most of the time. But they will know what to do. Do not worry. Sabrina you cannot keep killing doctors like that"

"I'm not going!! The backwoods motel where they put the strange and i tell you none of them know how to,wash their hands!!"

"You look like a witch!!"

"At least im a clean one fuck y'all shit"

This whole team of huge CIA dudes... They all washed their hands no less than 3 minutes up their elbows for an additional two while I watched.

This big one said "she's not alright you know that. I never washed my hands this much in my life"

I warned him i would kill him if he didn't get off the team "oh no it's refreshing I don't have a problem. My face too here i come"

When he lifted his face he saw mine. "There's nothing wrong with me sir. This world is unclean"

"That's that transelike state. Her voice gets hollow and the carries. Did she kill the others like that Bill?"

"No I didn't. He made me upset while i waited for th3 help I supposed to be needing. Like no one knows,l they can poison me any second"

I knew but i didn't know Denise injected medicine into my grandpa's vein.

I COULDN'T handle this guy at the sink. He wanted to teach me like he could do it better. Like i had something wrong with me. And he didnt like it"

"Out. Just get the fuck out of here. I'll give you a chance to live."

I ended up killing the whole line of people but this one little yellow Asian man.

He was surrounded by dead bodies. 5. They took the 3 guard nurses and the doctor out already.

"Do i wash my hands now? Is it my turn?"

"SIR!!" i said pissed off. I looked around me. My poor dad "well what do you think about your surroundings?"

"You look good. Able to kill real easily. Looks like I need some more training. But I'm just here to wash my hands as i was told to"

He told me the times he needed to wash.

"Well no one else is in line so I suppose that yes it's your turn now"

I laid down on the little check up table bed and fell to sleep. I was exhausted. Killed 9 people. Because they were aliens. And i would let someone live. 3 people in total. Out of 12..

It could be a good day after all, as long as i didn't go to Baywood Inn Acres.. I'd been there before. I escaped and let all the mental patients out. Well maybe if i went I could do that again I thought as I drifted off to sleep. I could still do it. I'd killed 9 today in just seconds.. I could let the rest escape.

Snoop put me on time restrictions. I bit him. I kicked him. I punched him in the stomach. He would walk in with a shield from SWAT to tell me to stop washing at the sink.

It was all scuffed up and I had to clean it. Germs get in them scratches and cracks...

Before he knew it it was all soaped up and If he exposed, his face he would get soaped too. Bar of soap.

Oh boy he was pissed off at me. "You need to kill the right people!!" Him and Alex Laughlin both said

"Then let me use the soap for as long as I want to"

I was a horrror show star. Like a doll. Like poltergeist. There's that doll that turns it's head all creepy. My eyes be glassy I walked around like I was dead.

I was. I was so dead inside. I KNEW my grandpa would die for no fucking reason. I knew and there wss nothing I could do to save that Old man!!!!

And i KNEW i was going get cancer, too!!!

Just wash it all off. Wash it down the drain.,that is I what i would say.

This video to some. But I used to do that.

2 years later I did get cancer in my throat just like I knew I would. I wrote about it.

So I handle death a lot better. Losing one. Germs.

If I know a person doesn't wash their hands and their hands are warm. I freak the fuck out.

"Don't fucking touch me" and I get filled with violent rage.

Some people think it's cool to make fun of me. A violent assassin. To this date with my bare hands no magic included in the last 35 years I've killed 22,489,601,427 people.

So y'all need to learn to wash your mother fucking hands. 35 seconds i recommend.

CDC says it's good in 20... Don't underestimate the power of germs. Scrub faster and go for long term use of that soap you just squirted on you. Go up to the elbows!

Eventually I got okay. To be okay I had to kill people. 862 thousand.

All aliens in stolen bodies. Then i was okay again.

But until then i would sleep walk to the sink wash,me up then hit the streets in a trance.

So they got a kid to live with me... Anton. From Queer Eye... Him...

"No what are you gonna do? He's got germs on him and he's our only kid!" Alex would bark at me.

"Then you kill him" i would tell him. He never did.

So i posted a video earlier. Poor child. "Wash your hands" "wash your hands!" In the video I shared that he shared. Poor child, "Now you gotta wash both hands although only one is dirty. The other might get jealous. Up to your elbows if you want to but definitely up to your wrists"

He played in the dirt a lot. If he didn't Snoop would pour it on him. "Now what are you gonna do?!?"

I smelled him make sure the cat didn't piss on it

Man Snoop did a hard fight. "Its fucking dirt snoop shut the fuck up!!:

I let that boy teach me about dirt. Is it clean? Does it feel fresh? Or smell bad?"

I let him choose whether to wash or not.

Somethings he HAD to wash after touching "raw meat" we had a list of things that could harm us if it was left on our hands.

I had to wash after uncooked hot dogs. Had to. Kid goddam creeped me out because he didn't

I'd just look at him like he was a leeper to give me leprosy from an uncooked hot dog.

"CHILL OUT!!!"

"Uh anuh he touched a raw hot dog and he didn't wash. Uncooked meat!! Its on there check the goddam list in a hurry" he was like a monster under my bed.

"It says raw meats baby."

"Uncooked is raw"

That little boy. Sweet precious angel he is. He said "i didn't agree because i wanted to go out side and play but now I see i take the hot dog containments into the dirt if I don't wash. So i would like to wash please"

I earned a kiss from Alex who was going by Gaberiel. At the time.

It shocked me with surprise. I did something right for the first time in weeks i wasn't yelled at by an adult. I put my head down on the arm of the chair and wept and wailed and cried.

I spent so much time fighting with who was supposed to be my friends. That it made me calm and feel normal. Ever since that day my grandpa died. I had so much built in my chest like a wall. Filled my body so.

Snoop finally understood under all that muscle mass and need to assassinate... I was still there.

"Lets go get some ice cream it's on the list for,being,human and you get sprinkles for crying."

"Lets go ma then I wanna play in the dirt.

I wasn't sure i could leave the house. I felt really wobbly... To go outside and not kill... It was dangerous. I tried to go back in like 14 times. But Alex kept stopping me. Or snoop or the baby Antony.

"Took us 15 minutes to go get us a dam treat,jist from the door to the car. When we go killing shes flying down the steps and first one to the car. Ain't no one gonna know what's wrong with her! Ain't no one!"

"I do! You just need to wash your hands! Wash Your hands!!" I had a sweet little boy next to me... I looked out the window of that white Cadillac and I sure did hope i could figure out how to,keep the world safe. They played and teased and made,him laugh.,all every one,in the car laughing with joy.

I just wanted to open the car door, jump out and die.

Later I finally told. Some movie reminded me of my grandpa... The only one I ever had. The one that allowed me to kill Denise. A prison guard.

"He died from something out side of him. Not inside out side. I can't handle it. It went down his arm.. Pink. It was something pink"

Snoop on his knees. "What was it poision?"

"Watch. Into here down this way to his pinkie then back up and then down around his heart and through his legs and up the other side and to his brain then he could smell the medicine cold cough syrup. And she kept doing it until the full bottle was,in,his body. It didn't work tho. The next day and the next. 3 more,days than,that. Then he was,dead. 2 bottles each day. Of cold medicine to kill tiny germs"

Alex's face,was,in terrified horror. Snoop still as a statue.

"Where do they live at?" Asked snoop.

"Texas. Redway lane"

"That is where you live at".

"That is what i am telling you. And i was in Texas and i didn't go to Arizona"

Snoop began to throw up in his hand and,ran,from the room.

Alex and Anthony looked at me all "why did you have to tell the truth?!"

"I'm trying to watch the movie here!!" Said Anthony "and tomorrow I wanna play in dirt"

"That's ok baby That's what you can do with Uncle Snoop. We'll be quiet now so you can watch the movie."

If you don't get germs on you. You don't get sick. Then you don't get murdered.

Stay Clean.

Corona. I'm telling you. It ain't no different.

Except I was told something worse than eating Vicks Vapo Rub would happen to me from Denise.

I had to kill 981,602,375 people like Denise until I felt satisfied the world was safer.

Until I could breathe again.

I felt my grandpa die. I was with him. I felt his whole body. When his left lung collapsed...

And he was begging "no Denise don't do it. It won't make me better. No Denise I don't want none. Dont put it in my IV. I don't have no cough or cold. I have cancer and I'm going to beat it"

And that Old man died. And I tried so hard. To keep his body alive. Just stay with him.

And his body was so riddled with cancer. He couldn't take being filled with the thick cough syrup.

After a million kills. Grandpa said I could stop the world would get better then. "If I do two more grandpa then it would get allot better"

We killed 6 million predators. By hand. We picked them from prisons.

Death Row and life sentences. They could die early if they wanted. They understood they would die. They signed contracts. And we filled them in gas chambers. And filled the air with a non toxic cough syrup smelling gas that made them relax. Laughing gas. Then we used rat poision gas. Until they died. We had some other gases too. I didnt care.

We did right by our promise and they choked end coughed choked on a white foam frothing from,their mouths. And,died.. And we watched them through a little window with gas masks on our faces.

"You know you could used a little more nitrous" would say Alex

"Only half choke to death. Most of them lay down peacefully to die."

Oddly white men were more often to fight Than the black man.

"Either the black men are innocent or they know,what to do in a poison situation"

One man. Black. Should been,dead. But he was crawling around checking on,the others. In pain he was.

I ran,from the control booth. Dodging people trying to stop me. I swung open the door against policy. Grabbed him up under his shoulders "why did you sign the paper if you didn't have any thing to do with the crime?$?!" I yelled through my gas mask

"All these are all dead i want to,know why I'm not!!: he was crying he was scared. "I didn't sign the paper because i wanted the hell out. I knew if i died I would go to Heaven!: he was sobbing. In a gas chamber. Filled with poison.

Alex held up a gas mask in,the Window I pointed my head towards my direction.

And I held the black man while he was on his knees in a room full of gas. Alex put the gas mask to protect from,gas on his face.

"Lets go you got to get out. You only have half a,mask"

"I can't"

"You got to,get out now"

He chose his fate. No one else. He would tell me when he was ready to live and i would hold him on his knees until he did. I just stared into Alex's eyes. While he said over and over "you got to, get out" like in case i forgot.

"I wanna get out! Can you help me??" I reached down and grabbed him by his waist. Hoisted him up to my hip and carried him out like a toddler. A nice grown man.

This poor man was a mess.

No one mentioned i was covered in cyanide. For 3 hours until when my skin began to itch "you need,to shower"

"When you finally get covered in killer germs you don't care Because you found someone more important, more desperate. Someone more in a bad situation.,then you don't even notice"

"You trained me not to. Could I at least get an SOS pads for my bath?"

Every one wore a gas mask around me. Even the kid. For three days Anthony did.

"Snoop said you can't go in his car covered in,gas,like,that so we got a rental car"

"You gonna drive in that gas mask?"

"Yeah. Sounds fun. We have to roll down the Windows for you to breathe. I know downtown LA but... And also we got you w hotel. You are covered in cyanide!! No on wants you home. But i do"

I think... It was the first time in my life any one ever gave me a bath while wearing a gas mask.

We had to,change,3 hotel rooms. So i wouldn't pollute the place up.

"See? You yelled at me and you're all jist as bad,and,won't even let,me,see my kid"

"Yeah well you trained us to be extra careful. More cautious than sorry"

Gaberiel. Alex Laughlin slept in bed next to me. In a gas,mask.

Sometimes I couldn't sleep. Thinkin about that man and my grandpa.

And I'd look down at the man next,to me. Pased out. Looking like an innocent kid himself.

I adored him. I felt so much love that a person would be in,danger for me. I shook his gas,mask gently

"What you woke me up what do you want? It was on purpose, too"

"Do you think that man knowed i cared? That I might love someone other than myself?"

"We treat you as though you are selfish because you sre using self harm and you don't understand it. No one is supposed to gargle with bleach? What If you swallowed it?"

"It burns my nostrils any way"

"That's not the point but baby doll. You could kill yourself and we wouldn't have you no more. That is,the point.,that is why we called you selfish. Your addiction to cleanliness could,kill you snd no one,wants that to happen. But look what you do. Go,in a gas,chamber FULL of gas with only a half mask on. You're lucky you don't go blind. But look st it this way. We pushed too hard and in the wrong way and you did drink bleach on purpose in desperation to be clean. It was undiluted, too. I know. I watched you. And you Didjt say anything. Just smiled and said "i feel" i wanted to,slap you then for not listening. But when you pushed me back so you could leave,tje room through the door i was blocking. You didnt act like nothing happened. You felt like nothing happened. And I realized we were doing something wrong then two,weeks later you tell us why it was so,important to be kept clean and germs off of you. And i wanted to die for the way snoop and I had been mistreating you. And that is why I started the gas chambers of criminals to honor Yoir grandpa for working at the prison to keep,them in line. End,it for your grandpa and avenge his death with revenge. It would be what healed you both. And next time call the police when someone is being poisoned."

"She did it when i,was asleep. I would fall asleep all kinds of times of days to be with him. I promised when i was a young kid that i wouldn't let him die alone. Not by her. And when i woke up I was too groggy to remember what was going on. I thought it was a dream a bad one i hoped it wasn't real but it was and i can't get over this feeling this fear.. That had me at constant companion"

"What does that mean my love?"

"Evil. My grandpa said"

So y'all in,this world of 2020

Keep,calm.

It is,gonna be okay.

[zaptap]

Ight help me out here. I've never played the first splatoon but I'm getting the switch and splatoon 2 looks good from the gameplay I've seen. Will I be totally lost starting at the second game? Any tips/stuff I should know about the game? Little summary maybe? Thanks!! 🐙

theres probably more i could put in this but i hate typing long stuff on mobile so heres what i got at least

your experience is going to be different since when i started everyone was figuring out the game so it was easier to get into it but i’ll do my best

there’s a tutorial you go through at the very beginning that teaches you the basics, and the single player mode will help ease you into it as well so i’d recommend doing that pretty early on

best way to control the camera/aim is a combination of gyro and the right stick. mainly you should use the stick to go left and right and gyro to go up and down

random bits of info the game either doesn’t tell you or doesn’t do a good job of it (though that could be different this time around):

–activating your special weapon refills your ink, so a possible strategy is to save that for an emergency (though that depends on what your special is–it’s good for the ink armor you start out with tho)–there is a line on your ink gauge that indicates you have enough to use your sub weapon, and when you have enough a red light at the top of your ink canister thing will be on. it makes a noise when it turns on–if there is ink on a wall, you can swim up and hit the jump button at the top and thatll spread it slightly higher, technically you can get up the whole wall this way but it takes extra time so it is mainly just useful for the limited ink challenges in the first game and in cases when you just barely didn’t ink high enough to get all the way up a wall–people have already found that you can roll in midair with the dualies, but only downward, which makes you fall faster. this is useful for stages like moray towers with a lot of high platforms, as well as just dodging ink when you aren’t on the ground

in general just try a bunch of things, go into the testing area (from the weapon select screen or the weapon shop) and experiment with your different options if you want (there are these target dummies you can hit to get numeric values of the damage), try out different gear abilities, and just play a lot

another good tip is to be aware of your surroundings. i move the camera around a lot to make sure nobody is sneaking up on me, and when swimming up a wall i frequently stop near the top to angle it so i can see if there’s an ambush awaiting me–and if there is, sometimes i hang around there a little longer until they drop their guard and/or leave (note that you have to hold up on the stick to stay in place on a wall, consider practicing that too)

keep moving around as much as possible, every multiplayer mode is timed (turf war is 3mins, ranked is 5, salmon run also has a timer) so every second counts

get to know the stages–you can do recon from the lobby by pressing Y, though you can only do this with the ones currently in rotation. learn how to navigate them, find out what’s inkable and what isn’t, etc. keep in mind ranked modes often alter the stages a little (they may add extra platforms or blocked off areas) so once you reach level 10 itd be a good idea to recon those too, plus you should also learn where the splat zones, tower path/checkpoints/goal, and rainmaker goal are (depending on the mode)

moray towers and port mackerel are (so far) the only stages returning from the first game, so despite having new elements to get used to, players of the first game will have a huge advantage. also keep in mind that those people are going to be almost all low leveled for the time being so you’ll be facing many of them if you play now, but tbh it’s probably a good idea to go ahead and try since that’s going to make you better at the game than if you just face people who are also new

now for gear. each piece of gear has a main ability that can’t be changed, and up to 3 sub abilities unlocked at random as you gain exp while wearing the gear (the amount of sub abilities initially available is tied to the amount of stars the gear has, and at the start you can only buy 1-star gear). some abilities can be stacked with diminishing returns (such as swim speed up) and others can’t. stackable ones will have a larger effect if they are a main ability than as a sub. some abilities are exclusive to only a certain type of gear (stealth jump is only on shoes, for instance)

the sea urchin kid to the right of the lobby entrance can help you with gear abilities. this works a bit differently than the first game but it’s likely it’ll still require super sea snails, which are earned from participating in splatfests so you can’t use some of his services yet (first game let you pay cash instead once you reached what was initially the max level–20–so they may do something like that again). anyway, he can add slots to your lower starred gear and allow you to change the sub abilities on your gear (with more control over what you get than in the first game). i could go into more detail, but i think if you talk to him as you level up you can easily figure out the rest (he can do some things for you without needing snails, for one thing)

i guess thats probably enough, though i may think of more later. hope you have fun with the game! くコ:ミ