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#I've recovered from the last one again
buttercupshands · 20 days
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Quick s7 premiere thoughts
Loved the new episode, I sure wasn't ready for Afomura becoming a thing so soon, like that scene is still... that
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But otherwise wow
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also a quick thank you for this scene having THIS track (a bit off from the original version) and voices of both AFO and Tomura mixing in places there
to other things
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little dangerous hand man
I'm in love with the ending... "Believe" and "Sketch" and now this one are like a Holy Trinity of Villain connected endings and this one FEELS like it belongs to MVA or something like that WAY MORE than the ED version of Believe did, even if the song was directly connected to Tomura and Izuku via text
that's just my "I want THIS SPECIFIC WAY" of wishing an ED was and I got what I wanted in a way with everyone from the LoV having their moment to shine (from the current arc aside from Compress) - so Spinner, Toga, Dabi and Tomura all have that. IN BOTH ED and OP
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and then OP is like
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this
so yeah, happy s7 day
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bunnihearted · 3 months
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🐇💭
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umilily · 30 days
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I've been trying to get this fucking degree for 7 years, suffering basically nonstop, taking part in all my classes, even taking extra ones, I think at this point I more than deserve them just giving me my bachelor's. I've done ENOUGH.
#lily talks#it has been a day#Have what might be my last exam ever on Friday and ahahahhah#I only got one attempt to pass it or I'll have to do an oral one and I would much rather die than do that#And I've put myself through almost 2 weeks of suffering from being unable to do basically anything other than lie in bed and stare at the#ceiling bc I am so stressed but enemy number 1 aka my brain refuses to let me sit down to properly study but at the same time i'm not#Allowed to do anything else because I'm not studying like I should be and I just am miserable#Anyway I've been a mess this entire time and NOW 2 fucking days before the exam the professor announces there will be another date in late#To take it instead#COULD YOU HAVE THOUGHT ABOUT THIS ANY EARLIER??????????#I am so tempted to switch the date because I barely studied and I feel like shit but i already suffered so much for this and then I would#Just have to do it all again#But I really can't afford to mess it up either bc I don't think I would recover from that. Genuinely.#I am so unbelievably done with all of this. The degree. uni. Constant stupid pressure from everyone about when I will finally be done.#Not even daring to think about the financial aspect because I would just cry#I feel so dumb for having a meltdown before any test situation I ever found myself in because you would expect that AT SOEM POINT my brain#That at some point I would learn to deal with it and cope somehow#Unfortunately I'm starting to doubt that this is going to happen in this lifetime
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sillyfudgemonkeys · 2 years
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@moldygreenblue Thank you~! 0////0 >////<
As for the fandom. Not sure. I know prior to the anni people were bitching about FES vs P3P. I think. The only person I was following that was participating in it was a FeMC lover (or maybe it was a handful, I’ve ended up following a lot of FeMC fans lately I hardly notice which one of them it is when they tweet half the time XV), and was playfully shitting on FES (memes about how P3P was better). They were playful and you could tell they were joking tho. Since I believe they got annoyed when an article came out saying that “P3P was the definitive way to play P3″ (hint: there’s no definitive way because Atlus hasn’t given us a definitive version). Or at least was annoyed by the title as I was and obvie other’s were. 
So my feed from the looks of it was missing pretty much all the drama. Heck, even the 2ish people I follow that I know who don’t really like P3 (they don’t tweet about it often) weren’t talking about it. But I would not be surprised if the stuff they’ve said about it (but taken to the extreme) were what was going around.
I kinda missed the anni cause I was at work, then I was on the road for 5ish hours. Then I fell asleep. And my phone only saves 24 tweets with the “tweet notification function” so if I’m not clearing them out, I don’t see what I’ve missed tbh. And when you’re driving..... 8U Yeah gonna miss a lot. Anything I saw were jokes (tho that was leading up to the anni more so than the anni), or that one article and everyone coming together and being annoyed with it. 
But if anyone wants to shed more like on it in the asks I’d be happy to hear it.
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deadm0ss · 24 days
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We are not doing good boys !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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thebibliosphere · 23 days
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One of the pitfalls I've been struggling with over the last three years while focusing on recovering from ADHD burnout is trying to find stimuli that are enriching and not just distracting because distracting stimuli might feel like it's keeping me from being bored, but really it's just keeping me numb enough so I don't have to process being bored or any of my emotions.
And that's not great when you're trying to heal trauma.
The problem is, I'm not finding a lot of things enriching at the moment. A lot of the things I've been relying on to keep my brain quiet since 2020 now feel overstimulating and are actively making me agitated rather than numb. Which I suppose is progress? It means I'm processing things and actually aware of them again instead of perceiving everything as background static.
It's just an odd predicament to be in. I don't think I've been this 'aware' of my own brain in a long time and on the one hand, cool. Great. Probably a good thing. On the other, aaaaah. Why is it so noisy in here?
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cerbreus · 1 year
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having an early spring birthday fucking sucks man shitall to do; no good movies, very few exhibitions, its wet and gloomy out and most parks are closed for the season... worst season hate early spring :’(
#what i would give to be able to go on a fun camping and hiking trip for my birthday#but i CANT because the first week of march is fucking MISERABLE it ALWAYS RAINS#and i like rain but it's the combo of rain + ice + so much mud SO MUCH MUD#been trying to think of something for weeks  to do for my bday bc last yr i was recovering from surgery and could barely leave my bed#but there once again is shitall to do and we live in a city now and it's still not really better#probably just going to go to some rock stores + thrift stores#and maybe one of the museums i haven't been to yet if it's open#the weekend after bc sadly i've got a weekday bday this year ;_;#only 2 weeks left to figure shit out...#i would even be fine with a winter birthday fr bc then maybe we could go skiing or tubing 8_8#but theres never even any good snow in march just the shitty wet icy brown stuff that still hasn't fully melted#personal stuff#i really really wish i could go rockhounding for my bday because we live 2 hrs from one of the very few places in the us and on the planet#where you can find Staurolites (aka; cross rocks/fairy crosses)#which are SO neat!!!!#but it's going to be cold and miserable and borderline dangerous to hang out around an icy river and i've already fallen through the ice#and almost died once in my life already so i'm not chancing that#sorry bit of a vent post here i just get older and every year it's a hassle to find something I want to do bc just like... nothing happens#in spring in the north
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bluethedream · 1 year
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knowing what's coming but going through with it anyway
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yesimwriting · 4 months
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thinking about bestfriend!felix who's known for being touchy within his social circle, so when he holds your hand as you walk around campus and leaves giggly kisses against your cheek, your jaw, your neck after a few drinks, you think nothing of it.
especially because it comes up in conversation from time to time. everyone that hangs out with him regularly enough has at least one story: felix smoothed circles against my back until i fell asleep on the bathroom floor after a party; he's kissed the top of my head twice; i've never seen him end a hug first.
and you've seen things--at parties, while studying, while out with friends in general. so you genuinely have no reason to think there's anything strange or different about the way he treats you, and neither does anyone else.
at first.
one night, when you're still new enough to felix and his world that you feel extremely out of place at a party that he invited you to, he calls you over to where he and his friends are sitting. you walk over to them, greeting everyone politely before moving to take the available space next to felix.
he grabs your wrist before you can actually sit. you're confused, but given little time to react. felix mumbles an absentminded, "c'mere" before pulling you towards his lap. it's a little flustering, but you sit, because that's just how felix is.
okay. normal enough. conversation continues. no one thinks twice about it. farleigh thinks it's a bit of overkill, but just assumes it's a combination of alcohol and maybe an attempt at laying the groundwork to hook up with you a little later in the night.
then, someone asks about potential vacation plans over break and farleigh brings up an inside joke from the last trip he and felix went on. it's casual, but it's clear that felix is supposed to say something.
farleigh looks over in time to see felix holding one of your hands to his lips. alright. still not the most egregious display of platonic affec--felix takes his time pressing kisses to each of your knuckles.
it's not just the gesture. it's the way felix watches your reaction through his lashes and the amount of care in his focus. as if you're the only one in the room. there's a patience there that's practically devoted.
maybe farleigh had it wrong. he thought you were just one of those platonic friends that felix would cart around for a few months before getting bored. maybe it's more romantic, or at the very least sexual.
then felix's eyebrows draw together. "you're cold." you start to say that you're fine, but before you can get the words out, felix is holding both of your hands between his.
in the beat that it takes farleigh to recover from the slightly nauseating display, the rest of the group has gone quiet. they're all watching felix dote on you like you're the reason for the moon hanging in the sky. annabel whispers something about the "unsuspecting".
farleigh eventually tries again, directly stating felix's name. he finally looks up, a little confused, as if coming out of a trance. farleigh repeats his earlier comment, finally getting a reaction from felix. the group recovers because while the moment had been almost uncomfortably intimate for something so casual, this is far from the first time felix has started (casually) seeing an 'outsider'.
some time passes and you finish your first drink. when felix notices, he asks if you want another. you tell him that you don't mind getting your own, but felix is insistent. you stand so that he can get up.
a part of you wishes you could have found an excuse to go with him. the gesture, in theory, is nice, but without felix's protection, being left with his friends feels like he's thrown you to the wolves.
annabel, a little tipsy and now curious asks, "so, how long have you and felix..." she trails off with a knowing look.
you kind of get what she's implying, but it feels like too random and too unfitting of an assumption to be accurate. "oh, we've been friends since around right after syllabus week, felix ask--"
"no," she shakes her head, "i mean--" she tries again, this time asking with precise language.
your face grows a few degrees warmer. "oh." the slight laugh that follows the syllable is too genuine for it to be you playing coy. "no, it's not--we're friends."
friends. you genuinely believe it. annabel fixes you with a tight lipped smile that makes something in your stomach knot.
you decide that her question must have been prompted by you sitting on felix's lap. you've also heard enough stories about them to assume that they have an on again off again, sort of thing, and because you really don't want to make an enemy of her, you try to justify it, "that was just--you've known him way longer, he's just like that."
oh my god. he's fooled you. completely convinced you that that's normal. before annabel can really react, felix comes back. he hands you your drink and kisses your cheek before sitting down next to you. he doesn't ask you to go back to where you were sitting before, but he does keep a hand on your knee.
----
some bestfriend!reader concepts ft oliver
another bestfriend! felix blurb :)
bestfriend! felix and reader basically dating
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k-dokja · 3 months
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Rewatching Avatar to write Zuko because I saw some Zuko and once again I need to write Zuko.
”E12, The Western Air Temple.
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"How are you fitting in?"
Zuko glances up at you with a hesitant smile, relaxing slightly when he sees you entering his room. "It's... going." He seems tired, despondent even. You're not surprised to see him in such a state after the way your friends had received him earlier.
"Sound optimistic," you sit down next to him with a genuine smile on your lips, settling comfortably on his bed. "I can imagine why they didn't take well to you."
He forces an awkward laugh, "I know, I know," he sighs, "I'm surprised you didn't chase me away, too, seeing how..."
You shrug with genuine nonchalance, "I can afford the brevity because I have seen you in your better days more often than your worst ones," you lower your voice to a whisper. "Besides, Aang needs a firebending teacher and you're our best choice."
"Oh," he breathes out, turning away, "that's very... pragmatic of you."
You'd be obtuse to not notice the disappointment in his voice when he says that. "Either way, it's nice to see you again," you say, attempting to lighten up the mood, "you know, as you, not as Lee or the Crown Prince, just... Zuko."
"Just Zuko," he echoes your words with a tentative nod, "that sounds... nice."
"It's better than nice," you nudge at his side, "now that, my friend Zuko is here with us, we'll be unstoppable."
At your words, Zuko can't help but smirk slightly, "I'm lucky to have a friend who holds me in such high esteem," he says solemnly, "I can only hope I'll live up to your expectations."
"Hey," you shrug, "there's no expectation, as long as you're able to help Aang train, I'll be happy."
Zuko opens his mouth as if wanted to say something, but he swallows and nods at the last second. "I'll try my best," he lets out a shaky breath, "if nothing else, I at least have that going for me."
"I've seen you bend," you think back to your brief encounters with him, "not extensively but... I think you'll manage, and if nothing else, at least, there'll be a start."
"Pragmatism and optimism," Zuko says, slightly amused, "you really have the best of both worlds."
You beam, "Wait until you see what else I have to offer."
It is meant as a jest, but by the time you become conscious of how it comes across, your eyes have been entranced by his. The gold of his eyes warmed into a honey shade, and briefly, you glance downwards.
"Yeah, can't wait," he replies and the breathy quality of his words makes you realise the error of your misstep.
"Uh, anyway," you stand up abruptly, "it was nice catching up with you, I guess we'll see you around more often, huh?"
You try to not look at him as you recover from your fluster, but the slight crack of awkwardness in his voice is clear to your ears. "Yeah, of course," he says, clearing his throat, "I'll see you around."
"Night, Zuko," you turn back to offer him a comforting smile, but it is as forced as anything you see on his face.
He nods at you, but his gaze remains transfixed on the floor. As you dash out of his room, You try to not dwell on that or the hint of blush on his ears.
Better to not think about the line you almost crossed when he had barely managed to get into the good graces of your friends.
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controld3vil · 2 months
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atreides and bene gesserit
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pairing(s): dune 2 cast x actor!reader (platonic), austin butler x actor!reader
synopsis: requested by this ask!
⤷ alt: as clueless as you were about your sister's role, it brought you much surprise and joy to see her on the same carpet as you.
notes: reader uses fem pronouns as she's playing a role as a bene gesserit. reader is also described as wearing a sleeveless jumpsuit. and i really enjoyed lea seydoux's performance and hope to see more of it !! this is also COMPLETELY separate from the first two posts ive made since the readers r playing different characters yeah?
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When Denise Villeneuve asked you about the role of Lady Margot Fenring, you were genuinely shocked about his decision. You appreciated his works but have never gotten close to any of his sets before. You have worked with directors who've admired Villeneuve for his imaginative mind. And now, you witnessed his creativity in person for the first time.
The role was small and not as significant as the other main leads. Regardless, your character was just as enigmatic and complex as any other in the Dune franchise. Even though your time was short, it was a fun experience to learn and observe from. You weren't able to meet the entire cast after production, but with the NYC premiere, you were able to link up again.
You heard your name being called out. "Hello! How are you?" The well-known comedian and presenter by the name of Amelia Dimonberg was now beside you. In her jet-black corset dress, her style is chic and elegant. She hands you a microphone with the film's title plastered on it. "You look beautiful!"
"Thank you!" you sweetly recuperate, diverting your shoulders to the sight, cutely. You give a little pose before complimenting her own outfit. "You as well!"
"Do you have a memorable day on set that sticks out to you?" Amelia questions, subtly leaning toward your direction. And now you noticed her detailed eye makeup which enhances her outfit altogether.
"Well- I've had, like, only a few days," You let out a quick sigh. Truly it was nothing to be embarrassed about but you could not help but feel shy about it.
"Mmhmm! So all of them?"
"Yeah, all of them!" With ease, your shyness turns into giddy laughter as all you remember from your times on set. Recalling those tiny moments brought a small smile to your face. "Every day counted for me and that was enough."
"Oh absolutely!" Amelia chides, nodding in agreement. She quickly then moves onto the next question, "How long do you think you could last in the actual desert?"
"Oo that's a tough question," Lifting your fingers to rest on your chin as you try to contemplate an answer. "Ideally no- I feel like I could never recover from the heat."
"Yes yes, the heat's very intense,"
"Yeah- no I don't think I'd ever leave my house for that-" You shake your head nonchalantly, acknowledging how most of your scenes already were indoors. You could imagine how you would do in the desert of Abu Dhabi. It makes you appreciate the cast and crew even more for their effort to make filming more comforting and tolerable.
"Where would be your dream location to hang out? I'm assuming your home then since you prefer to say inside?" The blonde interviewer quickly catches on, eyebrows raising intrigued by your response.
Instead, you hummed bashfully, "Actually I think an oasis would be nice." The camera catches onto Amelia's face, fully fixated on you. "Which fits perfectly if I were to live in the desert actually!"
"Mm yeah, smart choice!" She responds more cheerily. "You can maybe go for a swim, you know-"
"Right right," You give her an playful look, "And you don't have to go thirsty!"'
"Absolutely, the best of both worlds," Amelia chirps, doing the same expression. "So this film centers a lot around dreams. Do you have vivid dreams of yourself?"
"Yes! I've uh- I've had many dreams of myself. I mean, this one, for example-" You turn to the camera, waving with the most adorable smile on your face. "'I'm living my dream right now!"
"You're living your dream right now!"
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In another section of the premiere, you were walking down the carpet for press interviews and photography. The set where the premiere was taking place was gorgeously made in the shades of black and orange, the perfect theme of the film. The entire venue was outdoors, allowing you to feel the cold air and be more at ease in the crowded space. There were more paparazzi than you had expected, and you suddenly became aware that you were alone. Without any friend or acquaintance to accompany by, you searched aimlessly for a familiar face.
Then there was a holler. And then multiple more came after, it made you confused really. Your head swerves to the sound of the person you so try to look for and immediately you're struck in awe.
"Anya?!" In an instant, you're seen running towards your sister in the far back of the premiere wall. People were reluctantly used to fast-paced relocations around the carpet. Therefore most did not mind your hasty stumbles through the crowd. It was almost comical how apparent your demeanor changed when you heard her, in fact, videos and pictures caught all of it.
"Hi!" She beams in her white dress robe. Her makeup was glowing, making her skin seem angelic, and sheer without impurities. Her outfit covers her like a nun, covering her head and body in almost transparent cloth. Yet it flows around her so elegantly, almost like she was an angel from the stars. She squeezes your figure firmly, only after releasing to gush about your appearance.
You adored a beige sleeveless jumpsuit. The color is complimented with tiny designs of sparkle. Its seams captured your figure perfectly, as you also wore a gold chain and bulky rings. From the lighting, it looks as though your outfit is shining. And to be completely honest, you prefer comfort over the judging looks of fashion critics. Therefore you wanted to wear something that you could still move comfortably in. Thus you were able to run over to your sister with ease.
Through the other lens and camera, they could pick up some of her words after. "You look so gorgeous! How are you here?!" Anya's expression changes into a perplexed one as she gets a hold of your shoulders, shaking them back and forth.
"I was invited obviously, "You said, mimicking her voice while holding onto her arms on yours. "You didn't tell me you were a part of Dune!" Viewers from afar could tell you were pushing an act, reacting as though you were petrified about how Anya managed to be here in the first place.
"I didn't know you were either!" She giggled, closing in on your right ear. Your sister whispers to you slowly, trying to withdraw from the camera and recordings. "Villeneuve had mentioned something but honestly I just thought it was a joke."
It was your turn to guff. Your mouth opens wide flabbergasted, looking sarcastically offended. "Why would you think he's joking?!"
Anya scoffs lightly, wanting to go further with the joke. "I don't know- I just didn't take his word seriously,"
"Why? Because you didn't think I'd make it into the film?" You accused, eyes widening with a hand over your heart. "You're so cruel."
"So cruel," She smirks up at you, then moves back to be by your side. You see her face forward the flashing cameras, as you do the same. "Come! Let's take some pictures!"
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"Your outfit looks beautiful by the way!" Anya Taylor muses, eyeing down at the fine details on your jumpsuit. "It's very... you!"
You give her a nod, before flattening some of the creases, "I thought this color was so exquisite, so I thought it would be perfect for the premiere." You lift your head to look at your sister, before realizing behind her, the upcoming stars of the film were getting ready to take cast photos. "Oh Anya- I think you should go!"
Your sister turns and then gazes back at you with a soft smile. "You should come with me!"
The thunder of cameramen and journalist blurred your focus for a moment. "Are you sure-"
Again the sound of your name is hurdled but this time from someone you haven't seen in a long time. Jessica Ferguson, who too wears a black body suit with veils and bold makeup. She waves her hand almost too eagerly to have you come closer alongside your sister. "Come, join us!"
Videos were filmed of the people gesturing to the cast of Dune in a line. Little by little, the row of people is filled and organized to be in the center of the camera's focus. Some actors had to move spots, due to lack of space or better color semblance on the other side of the row. You stood next to Jessica and Florence Pugh was beside your right, as you tried to stand closer for the picture.
Anya Taylor was on the opposite side, with Austin Butler and beside him, Timothee Chalamet. A noticeable clip taken all over was when the French actor went to greet the English actress, warmly, clasping her hand with both hands as a proper salute as on-screen siblings.
You did not mind the lack of attention. You were happy for Anya for achieving a great role. One with a welcoming cast and crew. It was then your eyes scanned down the row, from Zendaya to Stellan Skarsgard. Then to Austin, whom you've been familiar with since day one. Only him to find your gaze seconds later. You give a little nod and smile before averting your direction to Anya who is already staring at you with gleaming eyes.
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You were going back and forth with Jessica and Florence on your travels for a while. From plans reception to favorite desserts, all you three wanted to talk about was food. Paparazzi caught onto your banter quickly and snapped a few photos. You even went out of your way to do silly poses. Followed by Jessica and Florence, then did the same, sticking their tongues out in a rock star kind of fashion. You throw out piece signs, giving a dramatic frown as another flash happens.
Catch-ups were definitely refreshing and fun. Thus why you nearly jump when Austin appeared behind you.
"Oh my gosh, hey!" You stuttered, giving him a quick hug to calm your nerves. "You scared me!"
"Sorry sorry! I just wanted to surprise you!" He leans his head slightly, allowing better eye contact. You felt a few taps on your shoulder and noticed Jessica and Florence scurrying away, with their thumbs up, all goofy and excited.
Your eyes make it back to his. "I would've said hi back at the cast photo, but you were so far away," Shrugging you dismiss your failure as a mild missed opportunity.
But Austin shakes his head in an averted manner. "No- Don't worry about it." You could already sense interviewers and others with microphones closing on you two. You were out in the open, and it's bound to happen. "I wanted to- you know, say hi to you in a less chaotic place."
"I tried looking for you but there's just so many people," You give your costar an exhausted look. It was then a keen young man approached the pair of you. It was the People magazine, as you became aware of the logo alongside their camera and microphone.
"Hey, would you two mind a short interview for People's magazine?"
Truly, this was what premieres were about. The cast and crew meet with fans to show what they have worked so hard for. You brought you no better satisfaction than to praise everyone's efforts. The interviewer then proceeded to have a quick introduction of you and Austin beside you. You both had separate microphones in each hand. Once the video started rolling, you peered at the camera and gave the audience a grin.
"So how are you guys doing? Met all of your lovely cast members yet?"
"Oh absolutely," You emphasized every syllable, nodding. Austin only glances at you in amusement. "It's crazy how many people are here I was so overwhelmed!"
"Yeah, it was pretty crowded," The male actor adds, lowering his microphone slightly.
"Hopefully it will die down!" The interviewer beams. "So what was it like getting to know each other in this film? How was the first day on set like?"
"Oh, well it went very smoothly," You start, staring up at Austin in approval. "Even though my time was short on set, I feel like we had a pretty good rhythm starting out."
"I was about to say! The scenes with Feyd and Lady Margot were really something!"
"Why thank you, we appreciate it," Austin nervously laughs, scratching his ear.
The interviewer takes the lead to discuss your preparation for the role and how it was working with Villeneuve. As new characters, you and Austin both talked about your views on both of your characters. Both are very different yet mysterious to the viewers. Additionally, you two were introduced in a similar scene of the pit fight. The People's Magazine interviewer was compelled to compliment Austin on his opening scene. You knew he had practiced the choreographed fights vigorously. And of which you were lucky to witness on the days that you were present.
"It was completely freeing and different than what I was used to doing," Austin probes, leaning toward your direction. "Were you there for the pit fight?"
"I think I was," You turn, similarly. "I remember watching from afar and thinking wow." Immediately you could sense him eagerly looking down at you with a sly smile. "He was- Austin did amazing with the fight choreography, I was impressed!"
"Was this the first time seeing him in full costume too?"
"Oh yes!" You bonked your hand on your forehead, "He was and I just- couldn't believe it was him!"
Suddenly Austin jumps in, "She was startled when I first came up to her in full costume."
"You came out of nowhere, by the way!" You rebutted, giving him a side glance.
"I didn't mean to," As he tries to reassure his actions, "I wanted to give a good first impression!" It was humorous how playful you two were together despite having dissimilar filming schedules. Though most of your scenes involved Butler, your friendship only became more apparent weeks after working together. It was off and on for months at a time due to being busy in other countries simultaneously.
Eventually, you were able to link up again weeks before the premiere. After waiting a long time to meet up, you almost felt relieved that you hadn't seen your costar in a while.
"And Austin, how was filming with her?! From a character's standpoint, what kind of dynamic do you see playing out?" The People's Magazine interviewer perks up, having the camera transition from his face to Austin's.
"Well I'd say, she's great. You know I've got to meet a lot of amazing people in this film. And," He says your name sincerely, "She's- she's one of those people. I can't say much for Lady Margot and Feyd's relationship- you know there's a lot of that's still not uncovered. We don't really know what's happening but kind of have an idea of something. And to have such a great actress like her, it makes everything feel authentic and- feel the tension." It felt as if you were in a daze, eyes completely focused on his words with such admiration and grace. Before you knew it, you were smiling as if you had won the best possible prize in the world. His compliments to you meant more than you had anticipated really.
Unbeknownst to you, the cameraman had caught your lovestruck expression before directing attention back to the interviewer. "And how about you, Miss Margot?"
"I'd say it's the same," Now looking at the interviewer, only momentarily back at your costar. "Austin's- he's great at all the stunts and acting like a scary dude. Every scene with him was fun to do. Like he's all serious in character but once they yell cut! he's so nice and funny!" Your bubbly laugh breaks as you can feel your face growing hot.
"Well I appreciate you liking my humor," Austin pokes fun at you, fanning a little air towards you.
You mutter a soft thank you! before continuing, "And he's dedicated you know? I remember one scene, a little spoiler, where Feyd is about to be tested by Lady Margot, and I just couldn't do it! I couldn't keep a straight face!"
"Really?!"
"She just kept breaking, I don't know why," The actor shrugs, his attention closely drawn to you. "We had a few takes on a few days."
"We did! We did!" You gave a big frown, "You just have a really distracting face."
"Do I?" Austin asks, between the lines of teasing and coolly.
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By the time, other premieres had occurred, people were still focused on your interactions with Austin Butler. Your chemistry on and off screen on the carpet was hilarious. And with how polarizing your characters were, it made many clips of your shared encounters gain attention.
A few short videos were recorded after the People Magazine interview of you and Austin, bashfully talking behind the stage. The two of you went back and forth whispering in each other's ears about what was unknown to the viewer. Through a bird's eye view, the video also catches you hugging your arms before zooming in on Austin's placing an arm around your figure.
Another clip that had been reposted many times was when you both took duo pictures together. As you comfortably shift your weight on one leg, as you turn to have your side face the flashing paparazzi. Whilst the Elvis actor stands beside you at a pleasant distance, doing the same pose to the other side. There was one instance where you lifted your head to make eye contact with your eyes instantly brightening. As Austin's smile widened, only to blow air in your face.
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Note
Hi, can you do a Percy x daughter of persephone headcannons pls
⋆⭒˚.⋆ percy jackson x daughter of persephone! reader hc
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content: percy jackson x daughter of persephone! reader hc warning: painfully hozier coded...that's it author's note: this one was also fun!! i kinda dove head first into looking at what being a demigod and a child of presephone meant, so the percy love thing kinda got lost but i hope i recovered it??? i still love this one tho!!
oh, daughter of presephone?! did you mean nico's step sister?? i think that's what you meant
he's protective and for what?? bro youre younger, stfu and walk away fr (we like to joke here, nico knows i love him)
tho the last sister percy had been put in charge of didn't end so well...so you can see where the protectiveness comes from.
i would like to formally apologize for that last one-
on a real note tho that's something that keeps percy up at night
he doesn't want to fail you, doesn't want to put you in any situation where your life is at risk, if you so much as get a scratch he's tearing everything down brick by brick
you're his precious flower girl
and he's willing to kill for you if it means you're safe
it also doesn't help that you really are lacking in the powers domain
you're like a diluted child of demeter (hey, gram-gram) with a minor affinity for graveyards.
that might be where the overprotectiveness comes from, this interpretation of weakness.
they're dead wrong, btw
you could topple cities, if you weren't such a diplomat
during the fall and winter, you make frequent visits with nico to the underworld, helping your mother keep her garden up and your step father with the diplomacy that comes with the underworld.
during the spring and summer, you're not allowed to go, as your mother isn't present. both hades and nico think this rule is stupid, but can't really fight it.
hades really do be losing his wifey and his beloved princess of daughter all at once. damn major L for his ass
anyways, we've lost the plot, back to percy
on the first date, percy made the mistake of getting flowers
typically, this wouldn't be a problem, any girl would kill to receive flowers
but the moment you opened your door and revealed percy with his bundle of flowers, tears began to pool in your eyes and you took them from his hand with a minor glare
"you killed them! they were living just fine and equally as beautiful but then you stomped up with your shears and you cut their heads off!" you cried, walking deep into your cabin and producing a plant pot from some closet, freeing the flowers from the butcher paper and shoving them into the dirt.
"w-what?" percy sputtered, following after you, slightly concerned that he might have completely fumbled this whole thing.
"you're lucky, jackson, that my momma isn't here or she'd have your ass. just picking flowers left and right," the girl continued to grumble before shoving her hands into the dirt with the flowers.
nothing happened for a moment then more sprouts grew in the pot, flowers beginning to grow to match the flowers that percy had brought for her.
percy just stared, not shocked, by trying to figure out how to recover from this massive mistake.
don't worry, he won you over
and, he never bought you flowers again, rather opting to bring you potted plants and seeds
he learned his lesson alright.
nico wasn't exactly the biggest fan of this relationship in the beginning but he knew there wasn't really much he could do.
plus, he could see how happy percy made you, the flowers in your cabin growing faster and bigger and more vibrant.
if anyone made his sister that happy, he'd allow them to stay around for just a bit longer.
on quests with you, percy always carried fruit, which you probably loved more than him
"we should probably stop soon, get something to eat," you'd say with a shrug
"okay, cool. so, i've got oranges, apples, that weird pink one that's white and black on the inside and pomegranates. you want something else?? i'm sure there's a store around here somewhere," he'd reply instantly, somehow managing to pull all of these fruit from the pocket of his hoodie and holding them out to her.
tbh every winter and fall when you aren't around, bro gets mopey
he misses his blossom and it doesn't help that all the plants are matching his mood
he'd rather be six feet under and shaking hands with your step father than anywhere that you aren't.
author's note cont. : another day, another hc collection bc i am a menace and cannot be stopped wahahahahahaha god i love writing this is so much fun!!
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vivwritesfics · 2 months
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New Perspective
Bradley knew how it had happened. She told him that she'd never been eaten out, batted her pretty eyelashes at him and he was on his knees, face buried between her lips. But it had turned her into a pillow princess, Bradley eagerly diving between her spread legs whenever she asked. Something had to change
Warnings: age gap relationship, anal mentioned (not performed), oral (fem!receiving), multiple orgasms, overstimation, p in v, oral (male!receiving), face fucking, face painting, porn with 0 plot, cum eating
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Bradley knew how it had happened. It was third date. They'd gotten to the restaurant, had one drink, and immediately bailed. Instead they got takeout, some more drinks, and returned to his place.
It was there on the sofa, as they sipped their drinks and ate takeout, that she confessed. They'd been together physically only once before, during their last date. It was what had made her comfortable enough to admit this to the older man she was seeing.
"I've never... been eaten out before."
It was a game of sorts, listing the things they hadn't done, the things they wanted to do. It hadn't started out sexual, but when Bradley admitted that he had never done anal, she knew she had to up the ante.
Bradley blinked at her, a surprised smile on his face. "You're kidding," he had said, his hand settling on top of hers. "So, nobody has ever had their mouth on your pussy before?" He asked, his mouth twitching up in a smile.
She shook her head.
Bradley took her to the bedroom after that. Well, first he pressed his lips to hers, pressing her into the couch. She had moaned into his mouth, legs locking around his middle as he hovered over her.
As she began pushing his shirt off of his shoulders, he stood up, pulling her with him. Bradley took her to the bedroom after that. He carried her, hands under her thighs as he walked her the short distance to his bedroom.
He laid her down on his sheets and pulled her underwear down her legs, discarding them on his bedroom floor. Pushing her skirt up, he kissed down her thighs, his moustache catching on her skin, burning slightly in all of the right ways.
Bradley took his time with her that night. He kissed her inner thigh, as close as he could get without properly touching where she needed him. And then he licked through her folds.
She came several times from oral alone. Bradley made sure of it. The way her body jolted each time his nose bumped her clit, and the way her moans grew louder every time he brought her close. Each orgasm was one that had her legs shaking. It was incredible, an experience she never wanted to end.
That was until she was pushing his head away, sore, sensitive and overstimulated. Bradley planted one last kiss on her soaked cunt and her hips swivelled away from him.
He cleaned her up after that, giving her plenty of time to recover before he fucked her, his cock pistoning in and out of her again and again and again.
She lost count of just how many orgasms she had that night.
It became a habit after that. Every time Bradley kissed her slow, his lips travelling down her neck, she opened her legs and he buried his face between them. Every time she laid there while Bradley did all of the work. He had accidentally turned her into a pillow princess.
She was his princess though. At first, Bradley didn't mind. He loved hearing the noises she would make while she came on his tongue, loved kissing her lips while he tasted of her.
But then, one day as Hangman was bragging about his latest sexual exploits, Bradley realised something. By this point they'd been together for a good six months, if not longer. And, in those six months, he hadn't had his dick sucked.
It wasn't like he hadn't thought of it. He'd woken up several times, cock achingly hard after dreaming of her on her knees, drool running down her chin as he pushed his cock between her lips.
And soon, it was something he couldn't stop thinking about. When at the navy hangar, servicing the Super Hornet that was his responsibility, it was all he could think about. Her face, painted with his cum.
Bradley knew he had to do something about it.
He went home to her that night. He didn't say hello, just immediately pressed his lips to hers. It was forceful and hot and, before she had said anything to him, she was moaning into his mouth.
Just as he had on the night of their third date, Bradley carried her to the bedroom. His hands were holding her thighs as he carried her down the hall and into the bedroom.
When he dropped her onto the bed, she pushed down her panties and opened her legs. But Bradley let out a single laugh. "Not this time, pretty girl," he said and pulled her to the end of the bed.
As he did, she unzipped his trousers and freed his cock. "I want you to suck my cock."
The way in which she slid from the bed and onto her knees, she was unsure. "Have you ever done this before, pretty girl?" He asked, his hand stroking over the skin on the side of her neck.
She swallowed. "Yeah, Bradley, I have," she said, wrapping her fingers around him.
Bradley's eyes shut. "Fuck," he hissed. It had been so long since somebody other than himself had touched his cock. After fantasising about this for weeks, maybe months, now, it was finally happening. She was really touching him.
He opened his eyes and looked down at her as she brought his cock to her lips. She didn't wrap her lips around him immediately, instead giving his tip little kitten licks. It was oh so teasing but oh so good. Bradley almost came then and there, just from watching her.
But finally, she wrapped her lips around him. She didn't take him all the way in, didn't have her nose buried in his pubic hair, not yet. "Fuck, pretty girl," Bradley hissed as she sucked the tip. "You're doing so good."
Finally, she took him as far as she could. It wasn't all the way, but it was as far as she could go. Tears sprang to her eyes and she took a moment to breath through her nose, to try her best not to gag.
His hands were in her hair, gently stroking through it. "You okay?" He asked and she nodded, keeping her lips around him.
She pulled back after that and pushed forward again. He gave her time to get into a rhythm, keeping his hands in her hair. "Holy shit, pretty girl," he whispered through a series of moans. "So good f' me."
Bradley might not have noticed when his hips began moving. Maybe because it was slow at first, matching the rhythm of her movements. But soon He was fucking her face, hands holding her in place as he moved.
She moaned around him as drool ran down her chin. It really was a scene from Bradley's fantasy, but he was too blissed out to notice.
"Fuck, baby," he cried, his hips stuttering. "I'm gonna-"
He pulled out just before he came, spurting over her face. Bradley's chest was heaving as he looked down at her, his cum painting her skin, her lips, some of it getting in her hair. "You're gorgeous," he said through a breath as he pulled her up.
Using his finger, he scooped up the cum from her cheek and held his finger to her lips, she was only more than happy to bring it between her lips and suck.
Bradley sat her down on the bed. He kissed her once and got to his own knees, setting himself up between her own legs. He was going to give her the most earth shattering orgasm ever.
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rhiaarrow · 2 months
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I've always wondered,
Why does Bad carry all his backpacks in his inventory? Why doesn't he wear one on his backpack slot? Even when he had his backpacks in backpacks before the restart he still didn't have one on his back. And it always bugged me, like it's taking up inventory space?
And while watching really old vods (like I'm talking early days of Dapper) I was confused when Bad put his main backpack in his backpack slot and not in his inventory. Because like if he did it then, why doesn't he do it now?
I DISCOVERED THE REASON!
After an amount of hours of vod watching (you will have to pry that number from my cold dead hands, I will never ever share the amount of hours I spend catching up on old vods) I finally found the reason! I feel like I just made like a monumental archeological discovery because it just, a missing puzzle piece has been found. I'm so satisfied now.
I hate myself that I lost which vod this came from but I just wanted to share this because it just, aaaaaaaaaaaa. I'm so happy I have an answer to this unanswered question I've had since I started watching Bad late last year and maybe other Ghosties had the same question?
I found the origin story, buried deep in one of the vods I was watching while falling asleep last night and wrote"backpack because item recovery backpack slot in danger dungeon with dapper" in my notes app at 3am (big props to past Rhia for that, I would've totally forgotten)
And then opened my notes today to note down smth from today's stream, admittedly I don't remember what, but I found the note and remembered I was gonna share my newfound knowledge so here it is!
Bad doesn't wear a backpack on his backpack slot because when you die your artifact slots don't immediately transfer to your body when you hit transfer items. You have to do it twice in order to get all your stuff.
Bad is in a dungeon in which there is no easy way to get Dapper out as soon as things go bad. Bad gets downed and purposely forces the respawn so Dapper won't try to come help him. He set a bed beforehand so he runs back into the dungeon, yelling for Dapper to stay wherever he is. He gets to his body, collects his stuff and goes back to fighting. But THEN he tries to grab something from his backpack and Oops, his backpack is still in his corpse. He gets knocked again, respawns again, gets his items, kills the mobs and THEN he recovers his main backpack.
Dapper was fine, he didn't get knocked at all but the fact that Bad couldn't immediately access his items in an emergency scared him about it happening in a more dangerous situation and he never puts it in his backpack slot again from that day on.
It's another habit he's picked up from being a paranoid babysitter, I finally have an answer! VINDICATION!
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paladinncleric · 4 months
Text
Neighbors.
Pairing(s): Tara Carpenter x fem!reader
Summary: Tara and R are neighbors
Warning(s): fluff, bad writing
Words: 1k+
A/N: I couldn't find the request but here you are, this is very rushed
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My eyes fluttered open as the Uber driver wakes me up. I payed and thanked him as I dragged my legs up the stairs of my apartment complex because the elevator was broken...again. I could barely comprehend my surroundings as I tried to get to my apartment. The tiredness of my 12 hour shift weighing down on me heavily.
As I finally reached my apartment, I looked for my keys. In my pockets? nope, not there. My bag? not there either. As I started to grow frustrated, I remembered I kept the extra key under the mat. But guess what? that was also not there. I felt like ramming my head through the wall but that will not help my situation.
Reminder to self: never give your extra key to your friends and then forget the original one at work. I can't even ask them to bring it as it's 2 in the fucking morning.
I cursed out loud as I kicked my door in a state of rage and tiredness that I completely forgot other people lived here too.
My last resort was to kindly ask my neighbor if I can spend the night at her place, who happens to be my very good friend and the person I've been in love with for the last year and a half. I nervously walked in front of her apartment and raised my fist to knock, my fist was left hanging in the air, when the door suddenly opened and I was faced with a pissed-off and sleepy Tara.
"I guess I was not being as quiet as I thought I was huh?" I said with a chuckle as I smiled awkwardly.
"That was you? I thought it was the Smiths down the hall going at it again." She said with a tired giggle.
"Why were you being so loud so late anyways?" She said with a chuckle as she let me in.
She stared at me expectantly for an answer with that cute little smile on her face as if she knew the effect she had on me. Probably she did, I was never really discreet with my staring. I snapped out of my thoughts as I answered her.
"I may have locked myself out of my apartment." I said with a frustrated sigh as I rubbed my head already feeling a headache coming in from the lack of sleep.
"What really? what about that key under your doormat?"
"Yea, that's the prob-how do you know about that?" I asked confused.
"Y/N/N you do know that, that's the first place someone would look for a key if they're trying to break-in? Also I saw you open the door with that once."
"I-I knew that! I just thought no one would try and break in..." My voice lowered in volume into a whisper as I continued, finally hearing how ridiculous it sounded.
Tara doubled over in laughter as she saw that I even doubted the things I said. And I stared at her fondly, loving the sound that filled the room. She wiped the lone tear from her face from the laugh and faced me with a huge grin.
"So what happened to it anyway?" She said chuckling still trying to recover from her fit of laughter.
"Mindy took it when she stayed over last time and forgot to return it."
"So what I got from this is that you don't have a place to stay?" She inquired.
"Basically, yeah"
"And as an amazing human being and an amazing friend I offer you my place for the night" She said with a grin as she gestured to her place.
I'll admit the 'friend' part stung a little but nothing I haven't dealt with before.
"Thanks so much Tar,I owe you one!" I exclaimed as I went and hugged her.
“Yeah yeah, stop acting like it’s your first time.”
She seemed to melt in my embrace, as she hugged me back tighter. I reluctantly let go as her scent was so hypnotizing.
"Let's get you in some comfy clothes" She said as she smoothed out the shirt and slacks I was wearing.
As she was walking away I 'discreetly' checked her out. She was wearing a white tee which rode up over her hips and black booty shorts which were too short to be honest. It's going to be a hard night.
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"Hey, you ready?" She asked as she poked her head into her room.
"Yea, I'm done." I said as I put my work clothes into the dirty clothes basket from what I was instructed earlier. I was in a black tee with grey joggers.
I turned around and saw her blatantly checking me out. I raised my eyebrows at her and she matched my expression once she caught my eye. I shook my head smiling at her goofiness and she chuckled.
"Where'd you get these clothes from anyway? They’re too big for your tiny self." I inquired.
Tara scoffed, “Bold of you to be rude to me tonight when I can easily kick you out.”
I raised my hands in mock surrender as she glared at me.
“They're Sam's, she left her clothes here the last time she stayed over."
"Makes sense."
After a moment of silence I couldn't fight my exhaustion any longer so I asked if the guest room was available.
"Well Sam is coming here in like 3 hours from her shift. So she would you kick you out if she found you sleeping there."
“Thought so.” I say bummed out as I thought of sleeping in the sofa. I started gathering my stuff and moving towards the living room when she stopped me.
After a moment of contemplating she asked, "Wait why don't you sleep in my room and I'll sleep downstairs on the sofa?"
"Nope, not happening it's your apartment I can't let you do that." I objected.
The bickering went on for a while until we both agreed to sleep on the same bed.
I mean it’s not like I haven’t slept over before, it’s just there’s always been someone from our group present.
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"So, which side of the bed do you prefer?" I asked.
"I prefer the right one, but you can choose tonight."
"Then I'll take the left one." I decided.
She shrugged and started to get ready for bed. After we were all tucked in, me laying on my back facing the ceiling, and her on her right side facing me. As I stared at the ceiling contemplating whether I should turn to face her too, I noticed her staring at me with a dazed expression.
"What?" I asked as I turned my head to face her.
"Hmm?"
"Why are you staring at me?"
"I don't know." I raised my eyebrows at her amused.
I turned to my left side completely and stared at her while she stared at me. I noticed a small smile appearing on her lips as she looked at me with a loving expression. I lost all my train of thoughts as I looked at her looking at me.
She's so beautiful when she smiles even if it's a small one, it can light up any room, the way her eyes squints and crinkle around the corner when she smiles too wide, the cute little dimples that forms on her cheeks. The way she laughs with her whole body and has a habit of leaning on things when laughing. The automatic pout that forms on her lips when she's sad, and the smirk present on her face most of the time when talking to me, that cute sexy smirk.
"Penny for your thoughts?" She asked.
"My thoughts are worth more than a penny." I grinned back at her.
"I'm sure they are." She said with a chuckle,
"Seriously, what're you thinking about?" She asked again, genuinely curious.
"You." I answered honestly.
“Me?" She asked surprised.
“Yea.”
“What about me?” She asked interested.
"How amazing you are." She raised her eyebrows at me.
“That’s awfully nice of you say.” She said with a soft smile.
I shrugged as I stared back with all the love I had for her pouring out.
Suddenly, she moved forward and hugged me tightly and buried her face in my neck. I hugged her back just as much as tightly and laid my head on top of hers. We stayed like that for a bit, then she pulled back a bit but still wrapped up in my arms.
"Y/N/N?"
She looked up and I looked down at her and answered.
"Yea?"
"I love you."
My heart fluttered and ached as I smiled slightly and answered.
"I love you too."
"Really?"
"Yea, why? are you doubting my love for you?" I said in a teasing tone as I moved some of her bangs from her eyes.
"Do you love me as just a friend?" She asked looking back and forth in my eye trying to find answers.
"Tara what are you trying to say?" I asked as I felt my heartbeat getting faster. She placed her hands on my chest on top of my heart.
“Your heart’s beating very fast.”
“I know.”
She stayed there for a moment with her hand on top of my heart, avoiding eye contact.
“Tara.”
"I'm in love with you." She blurted out.
I blinked multiple times and stared wide eyed at her. As she looked in my eyes for a bit then continued speaking.
"I have been in love with you since I first moved in here 3 years ago. You helped me with my mental health, whenever I felt anxious or scared you'd cook me your famous spaghetti and we'd watch horror movies all night even though I know you’d rather watch something else. I know it's too much to know right now but I just needed you to know, I couldn't wait any longer." She finished her confession.
I stared at her for a few seconds trying to process all this. I heard her sigh and starting to move away from me. Overcame in panic, I did the first thing I thought of and have been wanting to do for a while now.
I kissed her.
Her lips were so soft and smooth and tasted like cherry and honey as I cradled her jaw. I felt her reciprocating as I started to slowly move my lips against hers. There were no rush, we just laid there gently moving our lips against each other. She cradled my face in her hands and I rested my hands on her waist. We parted when there was a need of air. Both of us panting a bit as Tara rested her forehead against mine.
"You don't know how long I've wanted to do that for." I said slightly panting
"Eh, I had an idea." Tara grinned as she leaned forward and gave me a firm peck.
"For the record, I love you too." I replied with a grin as the butterflies came alive in my stomach.
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I groaned as I felt myself waking up. I fluttered my eyes open as I realized I'm in Tara's bedroom, all the memories from yesterday flooded my head, I smiled bashfully as I looked beside me to see the spot empty, but I could smell the pancakes in the air. I got up from the bed, stretched my muscles and scratched me back while yawning and went out of the room to see the cause of that heavenly smell.
I walked out of her room, to see her cooking pancakes in the stove with her back to me. I walked slowly towards her and leant against the counter. And loudly yelled out "So, what'cha making?" She jumped at least 3 feet from the ground.
"Y/N/N you scared the shit out of me!" Tara exclaimed as I burst out laughing, she smacked my shoulder with a spatula as she started pouting.
"Not my fault you get scared easily." I said with a shrug as I massaged the place she hit. For someone so small she sure could hit.
“Yea, I wonder why.”She glared at me as she sarcastically spoke.
I chuckled as she went back to making pancakes while I sighed dreamily as I stared at her being so domestic.
"I can feel you staring at me creep." She laughed as she turned around to give me a playful glare.
"You weren't discreet with it then, and you still aren't now.” She said with a smirk as she looked at me over her shoulders.
"Just so you know, I wasn't trying to be discreet." I replied with raised brows.
"Yea sure ok, whatever helps you sleep at night." She said with a sarcastic tone.
This bitch-
"Oh please don't be so flattered I wanted you to know." I said with a wave of my hands.
"Uh huh" She replied with a tone so obvious that she doesn't believe me.
I stared at her with a glare as she started to laugh loudly after glancing at me over her shoulders. I went behind her sneakily as I saw her put the last batch of pancakes on the plate and started tickling her. She jumped and screamed as she tried to get away from my fingers. But I trapped her in between the counter and me and started to tickle her more.
"Y/N/N STOP" She screamed out as she started struggling in my arms, I let her take a bit of an advantage as I loosened my arms a little and she moved away.
She started running towards the living room as she looked over her shoulders to see me running after her with an evil smirk and my fingers wiggling in the air in her direction. She sped up and screamed.
"Y/F/N I SWEAR TO GOD I'M GONNA KILL YOU IF YOU DON'T STOP THIS!"
I tackled her to the sofa and started tickling her again as I straddled her. And she started laughing uncontrollably as she tried to move my fingers away from her.
"OK STOP STOP I SURRENDER I GIVE UP I GIVE UP" She shouted and I finally stopped, both of us panting for air after all that cardio. I stared down at her as she stared up at me, still panting. I swear to God in that moment I've never seen something more gorgeous than her.
She had her hair sprawled across the sofa, bare-faced all red from laughing too much, sweating and panting as she looked up at me with this happy and content look in her eyes, it made my heart burst with joy, I felt like jumping around screaming dancing not believing that she loved me back. My stomach filled with butterflies and spread through to every inch of my body. I could feel my serotonins being released just by looking at her. She was my serotonin.
I started to lean down with the intention of kissing her, she looked up at me expectantly as she waited for me to close the gap. My hands on either side of her head as they supported my weight, when I was about an inch away from kissing her, she wrapped her arms around my neck.
"You're so very wrong if you think I'm gonna let you kiss me after the torture you put me through." She said with her lips brushing against mine then suddenly she pushed me off of her on the floor as I groaned and she got up from the sofa.
"And come quickly dumbass the pancakes are already cold because of you.” She said as she walked away swaying her hips to the kitchen, and I know she was smirking. I sighed contented as I laid there even though my butt hurt from the fall, it was worth it. God, I loved this girl so much.
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thebibliosphere · 6 months
Text
In case you were wondering how deep down the Batfam fixation hole I am, it's something I've actually been talking about in therapy a lot.
Not like, in a worried way, more just when my therapist asks me what I'm doing in my downtime, my answer always used to be either "sleeping" or "I don't have downtime. I have too much work to do."
Now my answer is "playing my Batman game" or "watching Batman show/reading comics/writing unhinged Batman x Muppet fanfic."
And my therapist is delighted. She's fucking ecstatic. She's like, "You have interests again!" and I'm like !!!! Because here's the thing.
Almost dying in 2019 kinda irrevocably fucked up my brain, like, a lot. Like a lot, a lot. And I've been grieving over that for the last few years as well as recovering from the physical aspects of it. And to cope with it, I threw myself into work even though I wasn't physically or mentally well enough, and that made everything worse, and well, if you've been here, you know.
My brain has not been kind to me for a long time. It still isn't. But I do the work. I do multiple types of therapy a week. I piece myself back together on the daily and try to remember what it means to be human and not just this numb static void that sometimes sounds like shrieking if you listen too closely.
And then randomly, a few months ago a friend bought me Gotham Knights on Steam, and it was like a light turned back on. The engine that'd been refusing to turn over for years suddenly sputtered back to life, and something in my brain went, "Hey, I remember this... this is fun?"
And then I started tentatively searching the tags here on Tumblr, and yeah, actually. I remember this. I remember enjoying this. I can dip my toes into this. This is safe. This is a childhood interest from Before the almost-dying-trauma. And besides, it won't get in the way of my work. This isn't going to consume me. Nothing consumes me like it used to. I'm too broken for that.
Except, haha, jokes on me because, for some fucking reason, Brucie fucking Wayne and his gaggle of chaotic crime-fighting children is what reached into my brain, picked up my trauma, and started shaking it loose like a category 7 earthquake.
I actually laughed about that with my therapist a few weeks ago. Of all characters, of all pieces of media, it's Batman that's helping me process a significant chunk of my emotional trauma in a healthy way.
The most emotionally constipated vigilante in superhero existence, and I'm weeping like a child every time I get an achievement in Gotham Knights, and it says some bullshit like this:
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ID: a purple steam achievement icon that says: He'd Be So Proud Of You. Reach the maximum level as any member of the Batman Family. 6.3% of players have this achievement. /end ID.
(for context, Batman is dead in this game, and you are playing as his emotionally devastated children trying to keep it together. Wailing, gnashing, crying, throwing up etc, etc.)
And my therapist, who has sat with me through EMDR sessions and a multitude of other shit designed to rewire your brain, just shrugs and says, "Sometimes we need to externalize our emotions through safe media. For you, right now, that safety is Batman having a relationship with the Muppets."
And like... okay, yeah. I'll take the win on that one.
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