#IM GONNA FUCKING BITE HIM LIKE A RABID DOG

[luminisvii]

at this point i think gundam seed is starting to haunt me on so many levels i might just have to make a post using big girl words to talk about it later when i finish. bc by god if i'm gonna be a bitter hater, i'm gonna be an informed bitter hater, and to do that i need to finish the show. at least it's not all bad, there have been things i liked, and it still has not made me as angry as unicorn did, but good fucking god this show is vying very hard to beat it

[catboygretzky]

Exyblr Dashboard Simulator based on what I personally see on sportsblr:

2/?

📜 realexyblog

haiku because exy is back:

GOD, why are my teams

SO fucking bad at exy?

FUCK this FUCKING sport.

#and i watch sports for why? entertainment? no way

243 notes

♛ queen-of-exy

I WAS RIGHT ALL ALONG! KEVIN DAY IS A QUEEN SHES LITERALLY A QUEEN ITS ON HER FACE

💃fox-me-up follow

queen on the court, pillow princess on the mattress amiright

♛ queen-of-exy

ive never felt more understood, I am kissing you w tongue

#marry me tumblr user fox me up

411 notes

🌞 blonde-jeremy-knox

i'm just gonna say it. i know we're all thinking it. jeremy knox eats ass like it's his JOB.

👁 jean-mor-uhoh

babe literally no one was thinking that but i'm proud of you for speaking your truth

#we're friends but what cost. when all u talk about is jeremy knox eating ass.

31 notes

🧚 goalie-stan

#dan wilds #psu

205 notes

🌄 softkevinday follow

He lived. He served cunt. He died. He was Resurrected. Served more cunt.

#kevin day

605 notes

👸🏻 kevindazed follow

absolutely busted a fucking nut watching kevin day switch hands like that oh my god my nut was so forceful it created a new dimension.

🏳️‍🌈 gay4stickball follow

hey can i join you in that dimension

👸🏻 kevindazed follow

Sure, just bring some snacks or something

🏳️‍🌈 gay4stickball follow

hell yeah!!!!!!

#thanks youre the best do you like doritos?

197 notes

😎 foxyknoxy

the best exy team in the nation is a LIBERAL ARTS COLLEGE how many of those students even go to the games when your school is full of artists and theater kids. your student section must be wACK

😎 foxyknoxy

*sorry, 2nd best exy team in the nation

#fuck you theater kids!!!!!!!! can't even appreciate a good sport !!!!! anyway go trojans

99 notes

🙈 ittybittyminny follow

Andrew Minyard should get a little bite and chew. As a reward. Maybe a small gnaw. nomnomnom Maaaaaybe as a treat he can rip a throat out, but only if he's really really good

#only if he's REALLY GOOD and maybe tests negative for rabies but whatever you can't win em all

126 notes

🏳️‍🌈 gay4stickball follow

favourite exy rarepair????

☀️ usctrojanny

ACTUALLY !!!!! was thinking about this earlier and while ive never seen anyone talk about it.......aaron minyard and neil josten would be 👀 kinda cute???

🏳️‍🌈 gay4stickball follow

omg wait why have I never thought about guys before!!!!!!!! noooo why did you say this, i can totally see it!!!!!! Neil would probably have to lean down to kiss aaron 🥺 do u think he has ever had to lean down to kiss someone 😭

☀️ usctrojanny

And obviously, u know me, im always here for a striker/backliner matchup

🏳️‍🌈 gay4stickball follow

this is all i'm going to think about for the rest of my life now, thanks, fuck you

139 notes

👅 nastyneiljosten

I want to put neil josten in a jar and shake the jar so violently he turns into sludge and then pour a drop of that sludge on to a petri dish so I can see what kind of bacteria he produces.

🦩 exyonmymind follow

what happens to the rest of the sludge?

👅 nastyneiljosten

*sluuuuuuurp* *swallowing sounds* *sluuuurp* *gargle gargle* *more swallowing sounds* yummy yummy in my tummy

487 notes

🐋 sexyexy

headcannon that neil josten is so feral bc andrew bit him and gave him rabies so now he's a literal rabid dog

👢exyinaphonebooth follow

You can't make headcannons about real people don't be freaks

🐋 sexyexy

exy players aren't real they're my little dolls that I can put into any situations I want and you can't stop me

#thanks anyway did u know andrew minyard gave neil josten rabies

143 notes

🧸 mreow-bearcats-mreow

ARE THOSE REFS FUCKING BLIND ????????!

#exy lb

👨🏻‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏻 talk-exy-to-me

Kiss cams are only acceptable during sporting events if they zoom in on two players

🗣️ jeremyknoxes follow

ok but what if they're wearing a face mask

👨🏻‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏻 talk-exy-to-me

smash your cages together obviously, don't be a pussy #love wins

🗣️ jeremyknoxes follow

fair enough

890 notes

🌸 softexy

Andrew and Aaron Minyard

#exy #andrew minyard #aaron minyard #palmetto foxes #psu #web weave #poetry

2,040 notes

[gothushi]

thinking about Seb lashing out not being able to control himself he would totally leave tones of scratches and bitemarks

collar him

i literally just woke up from a nap and have to answer this my jaws on the floor. cw collaring, mild breath play if ur squinting, marks

maybe something happened with his guardian (still don’t know if i headcanon him being with his own family or possibly a foster family or another relative/someone who adopted him. idk idk details shmetails) so maybe he’s just like. overstimulated. pissed off. every single thing makes him upset or angry. but he’s come over because he promised he would and you two were gonna watch a movie and spend time together.

one thing leads to another and you’re making out on the couch, he’s pawing at you, desperate to release his pent up energy from an entire days worth of anger and frustration. cut to him laid back, you’re ontop, grinding down onto him slow and teasing and he’s just so… upset.. he needs more, needs to take and take, needs these feelings to get out before he just absolutely blows up like a bomb. so suddenly, his frame is over yours, pinning you to the couch, your legs around his waist, and he goes feral. im talking hips slamming into yours, jostling your entire body up, his hands on your shoulders and dragging over your back and arms, nails digging into your skin, all the while he’s buried his head in your neck, biting at the junction of shoulder and neck hard, so fucking hard that my god it really hurts? is he drawing blood? (you consider stopping him, already having said plenty “seb–! hey!” “slow down– seb, fuck slow down” “sebastion” grabbing at his hair, pushing at his shoulders, it doesn’t work. but you let him do what he must because yes it hurts but it isn’t past your limits) he’s panting through his teeth, sobbing tears of frustration as he takes takes takes, fucks like some wild, rabid animal until he cums. he doesn’t even know if you’ve cum too but that’s the least of your worries as he collapses onto you, crying, panting, and you pet over his hair like you’re comforting a stray cat, gentle, soft, careful.

cue clean up, your back is fucked. red scratches from his dull nails go from shoulder blade to just above your ass. some even go from shoulder down your biceps, and the left side of your neck is ravaged. a deep bite mark is on the junction where he stayed for the most part, small little cuts from his teeth, but also a cluster of hickies and more faint little teeth marks littered down your shoulder. he sobs again, cries, says he’s sorry, he doesn’t know what happened, he feels so ashamed and is horrified you’re going to leave him. but you tsk, try to ground him with a few ‘i love you’s and order him to clean your back for you and apply some cream to the scratches since you can’t reach. he does so, hand trembling all the while, and then you sit down with him to have a proper talk.

he doesn’t know what happened, doesn’t know why he just lost control. he says he was just so.. so mad all day, everything was going wrong, everyone was upsetting (save for you). you have a healthy talk with him, telling him he can’t always leave you like you’ve been mauled by an animal when he gets upset, nor can he turn to other things like breaking shit or yelling. you tell him that you’ll both figure something out, reassuring plenty that you aren’t angry with him and you aren’t leaving him. two days pass, you’ve come up with a solution the next time you hang out.

you present a little box to him, no bigger than his hands held out together. he’s confused. a gift? for him? he insists he doesn’t deserve anything but the constant sting when you move on your back serves to remind that yes, he does deserve this, and urge him to open the box. inside is a black leather collar, meant for a dog, silver buckle and one singular ring beside it, and a matching leash. he’s like.. “i don’t have a dog..” but his own puppy eyes say otherwise! you gently explain that it’s meant for him, for his neck, something to try that might be able to ground him, and he’d only wear it when at your apartment. it takes a second for the intentions to click in his brain, and his cheeks go red, “you.. you think that’d work?” he’s skeptical, but you remind him he doesn’t have to try it, you just thought it’d be a nice idea. so.. he agrees. he lets you buckle the collar on, enough to fit three fingers through comfortably, and oh.

oh.

his cock fucking aches. it hurts in his jeans. the constant pressure on his neck is just so good he can’t believe he’d never explored this. he’s laid with his head in your lap, watching a movie, trying not to squirm around. he feels he doesn’t deserve to fuck you again yet afterall.. but you notice. notice the color on his cheeks as you play with his hair, the way his thighs stay pressed together, the subtle shifts of his hips, the way he hasn’t really said a word about the show when usually he’s a little chatterbox critiquing or pointing things out.

cue fifteen minutes later, he’s sat back on the couch whilst you’re riding him. the pace is agonizingly slow, and he’s grunting and whining like crazy. you’ve clipped the leash on, but it’s slack right now. his punishment is to not touch you, he has to just take what you give. soon enough though (you knew this would happen) his hands fly to your hips, grasping, a shakey “please” escapes him. quickly, you’ve got your one hand on the back of the couch, leash in hand, and it tugs on the collar enough to yank his head back some. the most pathetic noise you’ve ever heard comes from his throat, brows furrowing up, lips parting as it’s just a bit harder to breathe. “behave.” you’ll groan, fucking yourself down a little bit faster when his hands leave your waist.

he cums twice that night, and next time he’s at home jerking off with you on the brain, his hand wanders up to his neck.

[conretewings]

-OKAY OKAY SO I FUCKED UP. 🥺 I accidentally deleted an ask I was answering for you @barbersjoy and an Anon that gave me the same idea for poor Vander and the reader being 'interrupted' by the kids. So here I am trying to remember and redo it.

"I still can't believe ya told 'im we keep a rabid attack dog in the basement..."

Vander incredulously grumbles this to you while removing his boots as you're both getting ready for bed. It's been quite the day, with having to run a couple supply replenishment errands and a squabble breaking out in the bar. You glance at him via his reflection in the smudged mirror hanging over a dresser as you're brushing bits of dirt and sawdust from your hair and smirk.

"Shut him right up though didn't it?"

"Now people are gonna think we actually do."

"Hun if anyone is dumb enough to believe it that's their problem."

Having shed his boots and jacket, he drapes his shirt over a chair and steps up behind you to rest his large hands on your upper arms. The solid warmth of his chest is just touching your back and in the reflection you see him smirking as well.

"You certainly 'ave quite the mouth on ya today..."

You pause, seeing the shift in the pools of his grey eyes and hearing the subtle dip in his voice. If this was going where you were thinking, and secretly hoping, you were happy to play along.

"Well, Papa Bear, you knew what my mouth was like when we got together so I guess you can only blame yourself!" you reply with a smug, sultry tone.

You feel his fingers press a little more into your arms, his eyelids drooping ever so much and hear a low, deep rumbling his throat, and you feel the goosebumps race across your limbs; oh, you knew that combination and what came next.

He moves his face to the crook of your neck, brushing his lips and beard against your skin in that way he knew drove you nuts and sighed, encircling you in his thick arms. You grip the dresser, already feeling the lightning going right to your groin. Suddenly he pulls you harder into him, biting into your neck and you gasp.

"Hmmm..." he hums after releasing you, "I know...I also know all the other things it's good at, all the sounds I can draw out...what say we put that smartass lil' mouth to good use eh?"

You spin around in his grasp, pressing your lips to his as you fumble with his belt; if he wished to put your mouth 'to good use' you knew exactly what you wanted to do. His eyebrow shoots up and he stutters out a lustful, surprised "O-oh-" as you get it undone and slowly sink to your knees.

Looking up at him with half-lidded eyes, you run your hands up his thighs, just barely grazing the outline of his cock through his pants and relish the sharp hiss and curses he growls out.

"What about my mouth?" you grin, and go to slowly, teasingly release him-

A sharp, rapid knocking is suddenly heard accompanied by several voices yelling over each other.

"Vander!! You there? Mylo burned himself trying to pretend he was smoking!"

"I was NOT!"

"Why's your hand burned then?!"

Instantly the mood is dashed, you scrambling to your feet attempting to conceal any marks he left, Vander hastily redoing his pants and both your faces flushed with embarrassment and the frustration of pent-up desire having to be abandoned.

As he's still fumbling with the last buttons he shouts with annoyance, "I'll be right there, 'n after I make sure you're fine so help me if I find out ya actually pulled that stunt again-!"

He pauses, taking a slow, deep breath as he tugs his shirt back on and looks to you with a small tight-lipped, wry smile, "Sorry love...duty calls..."

"Go be a dad. I'll be here." you reply, and you both can't help but share a chuckle before he stalks out the door.

[you-cant-spell-subtext-without]

so get this. I was gonna roll around in Tombstone related fluff today - but no, no - this post came across my dash so Now We Are Gonna Discuss the Carnal Consumption of Meat as it appears on That Show Supernatural.  YEAH BUDDIES!

(also my sincere apologies to OP of the inspiration post who innocently tagged it with “lunch date!”  because I am about to go Elsewhere, cursedly).

Let’s all go meat man, after the cut!

This analysis centers primarily on 5x14 Bloody Valentine.  The title of course is a semi-homage to a 3D Slasher Film Jensen starred in circa 2009. 

Which I will be renting soon I guess.  ,[<- parasocial panda GET BACK IN YOUR ENCLOSURE]

Also Its Really Fun that the trailer for Said Cinema ends with “nothing says date movie like a 3-D ride to hell” [are you also thinking of Cas pulling Dean out of hell, or are you normal?]  ***unironically the teaser for 5x14 is -

EXT. SIDEWALK - IN FRONT OF ALICE'S APARTMENT BUILDING

RUSSEL 

First date.

They then eat each other.  Literally they eat each others flesh.  They also do it while dirty talking about it.  SPN IS A SHOW 

ALICE Ugh! I've been so alone. So empty...

RUSSEL I know. Me too.

ALICE I want you, Russel---All of you... inside me...

[they both take bites out of each other, Alice chewing on a piece of Russel's flesh]

****Remember this detail, as it is important.

ANYWAY, it’s truly Cursed that not only are we doing an homage to this 3-D Jensen Horror Date Flick but also this episode is specifically centered on Valentine’s Day.  The day honoring romance and love Now Coopted by Hallmark, everyone, that is the day spn writers chose to introduce us to 

Sir Horseman of THE Biblical Apocalypse Famine. 

Canonically, we are aware that the show is drawing from the book of Revelations in its depiction of the Four Horsemen.  Here’s what it says about Famine -

"When He broke the third seal, I heard the third living creature saying, "Come." I looked, and behold, a black horse; and he who sat on it had a pair of scales in his hand.”

-Revelations 6:5

Famine holds scales (used to weigh out grain in times of food scarcity).  Spn’s depiction is represented as hunger, a bottomless pit of need.  It consumes souls (demon and human alike).  

Cas describes Famine a little more poetically:

CASTIEL 

"And then will come Famine riding on a black steed. He will ride into the land of plenty... "

"... and great will be the Horseman's hunger, for he is hunger. "

"His hunger will seep out and poison the air. "

***Consider a prior season in which we are introduced to the Seven Deadly Sins.  Which are the sins associated with hunger?

Gluttony

and Lust.

***this is also important

Back to the episode.  Case cold open, and we find out that Alice was a Nice Girl.  In that she didnt drink, smoke or

have premarital sex.

***So Alice’s hunger for the sin of Lust caused her to succumb to it; and her demise was presented as Gluttony (literally eating her partner’s flesh). HMM

Famine’s presence is affecting the town, and Cas is not immune.

DEAN 

And when did you start eating?

CASTIEL 

Exactly. My hunger-- it's a clue, actually.

***They lay it out a little more in case you missed it ->

SAM 

I thought famine meant starvation, like as in, you know, food.

CASTIEL 

Yes. Absolutely. But not just food. I mean, everyone seems to be starving for something--Sex, attention, drugs, love...

***this is so important.  but of course because its spn and our textual narrators are generally unreliable (even in a Ben Edlund episode, yes I know)

we get a red herring

CASTIEL 

Right. The cherub made them crave love, and then Famine came, and made them rabid for it.

***but that’s not accurate.  they didn’t get married or become obsessed with each other (remember the cursed coin in 4x08 Wishful Thinking and the unconditional love wish? not what happened here). they had premarital sex.  they did the thing Alice considers wrong, and dark, and sinful.  and then they ate each others’ flesh.

DEAN 

Okay, but what about you? I mean, since when do angels secretly hunger for White Castle?

CASTIEL 

It's my vessel-- Jimmy. His, uh, appetite for red meat has been touched by Famine's effect

***mad lad Jimmy Novak’s hunger is for...red meat?  He is starving for red meat?  You are telling me that the Novaks, red blooded conservative religious midwestern Novaks, ate RED MEAT SO SPARINGLY that Jimmy Novak was LITERALLY starving for it?!?!  No way.  Absolutely no way.  This is a man who was such a religious zealot he STUCK HIS HAND IN BOILING WATER and accepted an angel of the lord into his own body but his secret hunger was for fucking ground beef?

give me a damn break.

to me this is an absolute coverup.  Because Cas’s burger consumption is not related one iota to his vessel Jimmy Novak.

it is a representation of Cas falling.  Cas’s cravings for meat represent his growing (and very much prohibited) feelings for...humanity (Dean Winchester), and they are presenting as Gluttony in the form of his downing more and more copious amounts of red meat.  

SERIOUSLY, consider this - at one point the depiction is so desperately carnal that he is eating raw ground beef with his bare hands. It is fucking uncomfortable.  and it is SUPPOSED to be.  Famine stirs up hunger for the prohibited.  For the sinful. That which we are starving for but do not believe we can ever have, so we lust and we lust and we LUST after it, but should we allow ourselves even just a taste of what we have been ravenously craving, we binge it until we ourselves disappear into the oblivion of our own sinful, dark desires.

Since You Want More Examples of why this cant possibly be hunger for Cheeseburgers and Cheeseburgers alone, Consider Famine’s effect on Dean.  Remember his doctor kink?

**when its revealed that Doctor Corman has succumbed to Famine’s poison by drinking himself to death, Dean - very uncharacteristically by the way - reacts by saying out loud

DEAN Thanks. Crap! I really kind of liked this guy.

***please note that Doctor Corman says the following to Dean in the prior scene they have together -

DR. CORMAN [to Dean]

Agent Marley, you just can't stay away.

****was that a flirtation?

***Also, Dean doesn’t want to go out and chase tail for Valentines Day.   

SAM

I mean, what do you always call it-- Uh, unattached drifter Christmas?

DEAN 

Oh, yeah. Well... be that as it may...I don't know. Guess I'm not feeling it this year.

SAM 

So you're not into bars full of lonely women?

DEAN 

Nah, I guess not. [takes a sip of his beer] Ahh. What?

SAM 

That's when a dog doesn't eat-- That's when you know something's really wrong.

***oh look we are relating things to eating again.  sex/lust to gluttony.  hmmm hmmm hmmm

ANYHOW -  *takes deep breath*

 this is also the Episode Where This Scene Lives

****JACKTING JOICES

oh and speaking of jacting joices, this is also the Dean Notices Cupids Crotch Episode.

frAckles, I am once again asking why you only permit celestial beings to hug you from behi-[gunshots]

but Dean isn’t hungry.  Why? Famine has the explanation, and we get it after Dean immediately runs inside after Cas heads in to complete his portion of their plan barely giving him any time to do so because he misses him that much.

FAMINE 

I disagree. [Famine moves closer to Dean and touches him] Yes. I see. That's one deep, dark nothing you got there, Dean. Can't fill it, can you? Not with food or drink. Not even with sex.

DEAN 

Oh, you're so full of crap.

FAMINE 

Oh, you can smirk and joke and lie to your brother, lie to yourself, but not to me! 

***not Dean making all of those homophobic/homoerotic jokes every time he’s in danger or feeing uncomfortable; not that, that can’t possibly be what Famine is referencing, right?

I can see inside you, Dean. I can see how broken you are, how defeated. 

***not THIS parallel:

AMARA:

You're a mystery. I can see inside your heart. Feel the love you feel, except… It's cloaked in shame

You can't win, and you know it. But you just keep fighting. Just... keep going through the motions. 

***not the motions of performative heterosexuality!!

***Dean’s not hungry because in his heart he truly believes that he can’t actually have what he hungers for.  That Thing Which This Episode Overtly but Also Very Clearly Made Obvious.  It’s an angel riding shotgun [I did Do That and I am Not Sorry], eating a burger in the front seat of the impala.  But, I’ve deviated from the meat of this essay [gunshots] [this time just for the bad joke].

BONUS

there’s Exists another episode in which a man ravenously consumes red meat; eventually succumbing to eating raw beef with his bare hands in the season prior to this one.  

Yes Supernatural the Show That Brought Us Not One But Two Scenes of Persons Carnally Consuming Red Meat With Their Bare Hands.  

This episode is a MOTW - the man in question is a rougaru - a monster that starts out as human but due to some specific genetic disorder (hmmm hmmm hmm crack in THE chassis hmmm hmmm) soon begins to be extremely hungry - “for everything, but eventually long pig.” AKA human flesh. 

Wanna know the kicker?  

Episode’s called Metamorphosis.

(GIF by jackttwist)

I’ll see myself out.

[DOUBLE BONUS for extra credit:

if you really wanna wild out, go watch the scene of Jack the rougaru looking at himself in the mirror in 4x04 - and then meander on over to 7x01 and check out God!stiel looking in the mirror as the leviathans writhe inside him over there. It’s worth the walk.]

***oh and @lilac-void​ im tagging you in this one because in exchange for your KIND creator content nomination I guess I will respond by cursing you with an Honorary tag in this, a Meat Meta.  you’re welcome slash I'm sorry XO [but seriously thank you again for your kindness and appreciation; it really motivated me to sit down and get moving on making more content <3]

[lostmystyx]

Pls enlighten me with ur kankri Hot Takes I don't know alot about the dancestors 🙏🙏🙏

buddy i know EVERYTHING about the dancestors. everything. and im wrong about nothing. i have read meenahbound at least ten times and that is an underestimate and not a joke. i have read every single fucking word kankris ever spoken, even the tiny shit, multiple fucking times, because my dedication to my craft is nothing if not thorough and torturous. ive read every goddamn character analysis there is on kankri, ive seen all the posts, ive read all the fics (not rlly i love myself), and i can tell you for a fact that everything everyone tells you about him is fuckint wrong. i started studying his character because i was mad abt how ooc ppl made him and i just got madder. i learned how to write him. i perfected it. and i havent done it in years because i hate him and his fans so fucking much. the world is not READY for my kankri takes. they do not DESERVE them.

but i love it when ppl ask me things, so for you, anon, i will take the time to divulge some of my secrets. first off, kankri is a bonafide grade a fucking asshole, hes ableist and sexist and abt every -ist under the sun, and he hides biting remarks under layers of political correctness and ranting so that by the time he insults you youre too zoned out to notice. that said, hes also not an outright asshole, hes not blunt with his meanness, hes not straight up about it, and people who just make him an uncaring dick are ALSO wrong. its an extremely thin line to walk and everyone is falling off like a toddler on a tightrope. he cares, deeply, but hes also fed up with everyone around him (and for good reason, because all of the other dancestors are ALSO massive assholes). he cares about being pc more than he cares about the actual issues hes "fighting for," he makes some good points, and he also makes a lot of bad ones. sometimes hes right, and sometimes hes just so caught up in what i believe boils down to a form of self-loathing via extreme policing of himself and others that he says and does the stupidest things known to man that make me want to cut my own dick off and staple it to my forehead so he can call me a whore and a transphobe.

second, hes capable of not ranting. like, he can carry a normal conversation where he talks a normal amount. it happens. inevitably someone will say something that gets him going, but you know. not every sentence has to be an essay.

third, oh my fucking god if one more person writes some fucking shit where hes "cured" of being celibate i am going to print out and laminate cards that say "youre an aphobe" to pass out to the masses. kankri isnt aroace, hes clearly in love with latula and just has self-imposed celibacy on himself possibly bc he thinks its gonna keep him from mucking up his quads, but even though hes not, and even if he was, the way people handle his celibacy is disgusting and offensive. if you dont want to write him celibate just dont make him celibate and pretend that never happened. otherwise it plays into the "ace ppl just havent found the right dick yet" thing, which iS RLLY OFFENSIVE. this is like. one of my number one kankri pet peeves. ill kill someone over this. the sexually repressed kankri hc i constantly see sucks and is objectively wrong anf im going to rip the head off of the next person i see doing it like a rabid fucking dog.

im going to make this my last note on this, bc i already have a headache just thinking about kankri, but the way ppl characterize his interpersonal relationships is bad. its bad. his relationship with latula is a mirror of karkats with terezi, nothing more, nothing less. his relationship with porrim is fucking bad and unhealthy. porrim babies and infantilizes him and regularly crosses his boundaries, and i t hink (?? dont quote me on this one its been a minute) the only time he rlly gets angry and blows up at someone is bc porrims does something he didnt consent to. at the same time, hes rlly rude to porrim and says loads of bigoted shit to her and treats her like shit. hes super ableist towards mituna, thinks hes an idiot, and treats him like shit. he doesnt really have a good relationship with anyone, because everyone hates him and he hates everyone and all of the dancestors are lions in a cage without enrichment, pacing back and forth and wondering how much longer they can stand each other before one of them snaps and kills the rest (oh wait! damara and meenah kind of did already! and kurloz is actively plotting a second death!)

anyway yeah. this is less of hot takes and more of a list of my pet peeves but yeah. i hate kankri, actually, i think hes the fucking worst, and i obsessively know everything about him out of spite.

disclaimer tho: i like all homestuck charas as charas like its cool its neat theyre cool n i hate kankri like you hate a villain but also i hate the fandoms idea of kankri and i hate kankri fans and if youre going to comment on this post defending ur hcs dont

[tigerdrop]

If you ever write Gordon getting dicked down by benrey, I can only image benrey just losing his mind and unable to form coherent sentences just going on and on and thanking Gordon for letting him do this. Just constantly saying how good gordon is to him and thank you over and over again.

bro do i have something for u. i was going off about this exact thing just last night

what if benrey humped gordons pillow.. you know..... like a. its a. its a petplay thing okay fuckin leave me alone. gordons prolly got more than one pillow right. what if......he had his face buried in the other one (or, you know, an other one, idk) while hes doing it b/c it......smells like......gordon......

like hes on his knees bent over, going completely crazy on one pillow, while perhaps hugging his face into the other and his whimpers and moans r muffled and oh god im rabid

rotating in my mind. maybe he wouldnt have been able to get off just from that ordinarily. it was just, like, warming up. he was gonna just jack it over the pillow later (you know, b/c hes fucking gross, and maybe hes entertaining wild fantasies of marking gordons stuff. you know). but its actually gordon saying a bunch of degrading comments (and then saying that if he was a good boy, he would finish what he started) to him that pushes him over the edge and makes him able to come for real

benrey's going absolutely ape bananas on the pillow, uncoordinated and desperate to come, with gordon breathing shit like "fuck the pillow like you'd fuck me" right in his ear. gordon's crazed on the power of being able to make benrey piston faster with just a little dirty talk

god. like. the fucking groan that would rip out of him at that b/c he wants to do just that so badly. not like he can deny that thats what he was thinking about the whole time, right

benrey just starts babbling nonsense on exactly how he wants to fuck him, if he'd let him

like. if hes wanted to do just that for so long, so badly, but hes never been able to prove that hes been good enough for gordon to let him (or at least, thats what hes convinced the issue is. if its up to me, its probably bound up in gordons weird internalized homophobia issues about bottoming.......but yknow thats not the way everybody characterizes him so LOL). and he really starts rutting into it good and hard trying to prove that hed be good for gordon, hed make it real fucking good for him, and maybe if he does it right, gordon will let him fuck him just like that

seeing benrey fuck the pillow as if its actually gordon makes him feel. some kinda way. and maybe he decides afterwards or sometime soon after, he actually DOES want benrey to fuck him like that. and when it happens, hes got benrey by the leash, tugging him and instructing him on what to do, telling him hes a good boy and UH HEY why are you reading this message are you fucking homosexual or somethi

okay. so. like. thinking about. gordon finally getting over himself enough to consider letting benrey top him. but if theyre gonna do this, hes gonna be the one in control, still. otherwise whats the whole fucking point of the bit theyre doing? so hes very strictly instructing benrey what to do, making him sit there and fold his goddamn hands behind his back and not touch, not move, just sit there and watch while gordon gets himself ready, because he dont trust like that. if benrey cant behave here, now, then gordon doesnt believe hell be able to behave when benreys got his dick in his ass. its like the apocryphal "green m&ms" story - if you cant obey the little rules, then theres no guarantee that you can obey the big rules, either

so benreys just watching, and hes fucking sweating, b/c he wants to be so fucking good right now. if he doesnt behave, hes not gonna get what hes wanted for so long, and gordon sure as shit wont let him do it again. so hes patient. he pants, open-mouthed, and his dick just twitches and bobs but he doesnt touch it b/c he wasnt told to. but man, is it hard when hes watching gordon get his fingers inside himself like that. watching his face turn red, watching him sweat, wanting it to be his fingers inside gordon so goddamn badly and just make him beg for more. but hes certain he cant get away with that, so he doesnt, and he just sits there and suffers

what if when gordon first takes benrey inside him, benrey notices a look of discomfort on gordons face that remains there for a hot minute. and slightly concerned, benrey speaks up, “yo you good? do we need to sto-“ and gordon is stubborn and insists he’s absolutely fine, hes completely cool, chill, all that. and hes got this.....! yknow, horny glare on his face, showing he means business and that hes so fucking into this, just as much as benrey is

gordon coming more and more undone as he fucks his own ass, his reprieved "control" on the situation slipping, benrey's listening the best he's ever listened and all of it's making gordon so goddamn hot. he tries to make it sound authoritative when he asks benrey to fuck him, it doesn't come out that way at all but benrey's so spellbound by the permission that he doesn't notice or care. just dives right in :)

then, finally, gordon feels like hes ready, and its really obvious how embarrassed he is even when hes trying to play at maintaining control over the situation. hes saying a lot of defensive shit like "dont say anything weird, dont make any weird fucking comments, just. look. if you wanna do this, then, uh. cmon." as he gets himself on his hands and knees and tugs benrey over to him by the collar and basically presents himself to be fucking mounted, because, you know, thats what theyre doing here. thats what their whole fucking game is

now. look. my benreys got a big dick. most benreys got a big dick. this benreys got a big fucking dick and gordon knows this real well by now, so hes insistent that benrey takes it as slow as possible. and it takes every goddamn ounce of his self-control to do as gordon asks, but its so worth it, because just that slow press inside of him for the first time is so, so good. gordons unbelievably tight, and hes making choked sounds and gasping and even though hes being super bossy, hes already gagging for it, practically. and like what you said: benreys fucking desperate to rail him into the ground, but hes also deeply invested in listening to exactly what gordon says and making it as good for him as he can

and he gets himself buried to the hilt, finally, after so long hes sure hed be going soft if it wasnt gordon, if he wasnt so deeply into being bossed around like this. and gordon breathlessly tells benrey to give him a moment, jesus, let him adjust. so he waits. and he waits. until gordon tugs at his leash, and tells him to move. but slowly, okay. so benrey does as hes told, and when he hits just the right pace, gordon does him the kindness of calling him a good boy and his fingers tighten instinctively on gordons hips

thats all he fuckin wants, bro. he wants gordon to call him a good boy and let benrey fuck him silly. (theyre getting to that second one.) slowly, gordon lets him pick up the pace, and hes trying to hard to maintain control but benreys dick is ruining him. gordons legs shake, his arms start to give way, and his back dips lower and lower while he raises his ass higher. and hes so fucking vocal. so much higher and louder than when hes topping. his mouths starting to run off, ordering benrey to fuck him harder while he gives that leash a sharp tug, and "good boy" spills from his lips with a greater frequency

and benreys just pressing him further and further into the mattress, legs braced around gordons in rut like a fucking mating press, and gordons really starting to lose control over the situation. benreys asking him shit like "yo......is it good bro? am i good?" because he just wants to hear it from gordon - yeah, hes good, hes doing so good, hes a good boy. hes gordons good boy. its some of the most effusive praise benreys gotten, and it goes straight to his head. and gordons pulling that leash so fucking tight, bending benrey over his back, while his orders for benrey not to stop begin to bleed into pleas and his babblings starting to get incoherent. and when hes like "please, oh god, im gonna come," benrey goes for the extra credit and reaches around to jerk him off and gordon just breaks

starts hardcore running his mouth and begging benrey to come in him, god, he can bite a little if he wants, its okay, just keep going, and gordon comes with the loudest wail benreys ever drawn out of him. and hes so overstimulated but he meant it when he said he wanted benrey to fuck him until he came, so hes mumbling about how good benrey is for him deliriously until benreys telling him thank you over and over again as he comes deep inside gordon. and then he pulls out and starts licking gordon and nuzzling his head into him and other gay shit while gordon pats his head and weakly reiterates that, yes, he was a good fucking dog and he did very fucking well, thank you

My Final Message. Good bye

[trashcanband4]

The Loser

Imagine Daryl getting mad when Negan takes a liking to you.

Title: The loser. Warnings: None. Pairing: Darylxreader. Word count: 2,844. Setting: Alexandria a few months after Negan get’s put into the cell.

You had been the one caring for Negan for a few months now and while you still hated the guy with everything in you for the most part the exchanges between you had been pleasant. Yes he was a horrible, heinous human being and he didn’t have a heart, but you did. And it made it hard to see a human being locked behind bars for forever. He wasn’t even allowed to walk around outside in the fresh air. Even the most evil of animals didn’t deserve to be locked up for forever. If a dog bit a human it was most commonly understood that the dog was just be shot. Wasn’t Negan just a human version of a rabid dog with rabies? Why didn’t the council just kill him like they would a rabid dog?

So you hated going down to that dim dirty basement and seeing the down-in-the-dumps man three times a day. You hated that you pitied him. “Hi.” You chimed as you walked in with a paper plate containing a sandwich and a bottle of water.

“Ah, y/n, my favorite person. What’s for lunch today? Please tell me it’s not another grilled eggplant. That shit sucked ass.” He said with a slight lean back where he had moved to stand at the bars next to the tray slot.

“Egg, avocado and lettuce sandwich.” You said as you handed him the plate through the slot.

You could tell he was about to complain, but when his eyes caught yours he smiled and took the plate out of your hand. “Thanks.”

“You’re allowed to complain you know. Lord knows I would be if I were in there.” You said as you sat down in the chair that sat against the stone wall in the room.

“If you were in here with me? Na I don’t think you’d be doin’ much complainin’.” When you looked up from the sketch pad in your hands he winked at you. You felt a blush warm your cheeks as you moved your eyes back down to the sketch pad. It was also your job to sketch views of the towns for documentation and proof that there were settlements in this crazy world. You planned on scattering them out over the settlements just incase something happened they all wouldn’t get ruined if a building or two ended up getting set on fire. You wanted your art to be left behind for future generations to see when you were long gone.

Negan laughed, apparently able to see the pink tint that his comment brought to your face. “What are you doin’ over there?” he asked with a nod to the pad as he chewed on a bite of his sandwich.

“Michonne has given me the task of sketching different parts of Alexandria.” you said as you sketched one of the bars of the cell, not yet working on Negan himself.

“And I’m part of Alexandria?” he asked with a hint of surprise in his voice.

“Well right now it’s just your cell, but be nice to me and maybe I’ll put you in the drawing.”

“Oh, I’ll be nice.” Once again his tone made you blush, but you bit your lips closed and focused on your work. He chuckled quietly to himself. It was quiet for a while, the whole time his eyes were on you, but you only looked up to take in the details of the room and not the man in it. “Tell me, you got a guy up there on the surface?” he motioned to the window where you could see peoples feet as they walked around outside.

“No.” you answered not looking at him.

“So you and Daryl…?” he asked waiting for you to finish his sentence.

“You know it’s really hard to concentrate with you talking.” You said looking up from the paper to finally look at him.

“You said be nice.” He pointed out making you scowl.

“Fine then be quiet and I’ll consider drawing you in.” You snapped and he just smiled.

“So you do like Daryl?” he said through his smile and you bit your lip as you got back to work. It was once again quiet for a few minutes as you finished up the outline of the cell behind the bars that you had drawn. It was time to decide if you were going to sketch Negan into the cell. “Daryl’s an idiot you know. If we were back at the sanctuary I would’ve already asked you to marry me.”

You had been looking down at your pad, but when he said that you couldn’t help glaring up at him through your lashes. “What?” you had no clue why this was the word that you chose to let past your lips but it made Negan flash a big smile and in that moment you found yourself understanding why the women who agreed to be his wife had done so.

“Come on, you’re hot and you know it.” You had never thought of yourself as hot even once in your life. “If we were back at the sanctuary and you were alone, no Daryl, none of your people there to take care of you, no knowledge of the events that landed me here, what would you say to my proposal?”

You closed the book and hugged it to your chest as you glared at him and thought about your answer. If the circumstances were what he just described to you…? You started actually considering it. He wasn’t unattractive. Actually he was pretty damn hot. From what you had heard none of his brides went without and he wasn’t mean to them. The only down side was that you would have to share him. That in and of it’s self was a deal breaker.

“No.” you answered.

“Seriously?” he asked with his signature lean back. You didn’t answer and just watched as he grabbed the paper plate and held it out for you through the slot.

You set the pad on the floor and got up to take the plate from him. “Yeah, seriously.” You answered as you grabbed the plate.

“Why not?” he asked as he grabbed your hand through the slot and flipped it over in his. You dropped the plate on the outside of his cell. You could have taken your hand back. It was just sitting in his, but his sudden action had stunned you. Your eyes moved to his hazels stunning you even more. You saw his body move as he lifted his other hand and started drawing on the palm of your hand with the tip of his pointer finger. “You know I would take care of you.”

Little did you know that Daryl had walked by and heard Negan talking to someone in a flirtatious tone. So he leaned down and peered through the window.

You inhaled a deep breath and let it out, hating how good Negan’s touch felt. “I don’t share.” You said as you took your hand from his. As soon as the warmth was gone you felt yourself sobering up from the daze hisintimacy had put you in.

“Well, good news, I’m single.” He said and you shook your head and turned your back on him to bend down and pick up your drawing pad. “Damn.” He sighed shaking his head as he took in your ass that you had pointed right at him without thinking about it. You stood up and spun around quickly. “You have the keys, why don’t you come inside and let me show you how much I appreciate that fine ass of yours?”

After he asked that you heard the basement door open and Daryl came charging in. “Daryl?” you asked in confusion as he came rushing in looking pissed. “I thought you were out on a run, what are you doin’ here?” you asked in confusion as he stomped over and grabbed you by your upper arm.

“Yeah, Daryl, what are you doin’ here?” Negan echoed your question sarcastically.

“Come on, you’re done here.” Daryl started pulling you from the cell and you willingly followed. He didn’t let go of you until you were outside and then it was like he practically threw you away from him.

“What the hell is your problem Daryl?” you asked looking up at him with creased brows.

“What’s my problem?” he asked back at you. “What the hell is wrong with you, letting him touch you like that?” he growled, practically yelling at you.

You felt yourself deflate and crossed your arms over your chest, covering it with your drawing pad. You felt a tear run down your face from how he treated you and you turned away from him and started toward your house. You weren’t going to argue with him about this in the middle of the street. As you passed one of the windows of the cell you saw Negan looking up at you. You rolled your eyes and kept walking.

You weren’t aware that Daryl was following you untill you went inside and tried to shut the door behind you only for it to hit him. You turned around, stunned that he was there. “Are you gonna answer me?” he asked slamming the door behind him.

“No.” your quick answer only seemed to make him madder. “I don’t think I have to explain myself to you.”

“You seriously think he likes you? He’s playing head games with you.” Daryl glared down at you and tapped your temple with his middle finger.

You slapped him away. “You don’t think I know that?!” you yelled up at him “Regardless of what you think I’m not stupid.” You walked into the kitchen to get yourself a drink.

“I know you’re not.” Daryl almost yelled as he followed you to the kitchen. “You’re the smartest fuckin’ woman I know! That’s why I’m pissed that you let ‘im lay his grubby hand on ya! It looked like you were enjoying it!” you just pored yourself a glassed of water and took a sip as he yelled at you. “He’s a fuckin’ monster and you looked like you were ready to fuck ‘im. I’d expect it from another woman, but you?” his yelling was starting to get under your skin and make your blood boil. “Why-”

Finally you couldn’t take it anymore and placed your palms on the bar as you leaned across it at him “Because it felt good to be wanted!” your yelled words finally shut him up. He just stared at you and the tears that had started slipping down your cheeks. “No man has even given me a second look since the world fell, so excuse the fuck out of me for having a moment of weakness.” You grabbed your cup of water and walked out of the kitchen and to your room where you slammed the door behind you.

You sat down at your desk and took a few deep breaths to calm yourself. After you calmed down you decided that the future generations needed to know that even after the era of civilization fell putting people in prison was still something that worked. So you started sketching Negan by memory. You had just finished what you could when you heard a knock on your bedroom door.

As soon as you opened the door Daryl took a step toward you, grabbed your face in his hands and pressed his lips to yours. You stumbled back from the force but your lips remained together and he kicked the door shut behind him. Daryl didn’t know how to say that he had not only given you a second look, but about a thousand since he’d first met you at hilltop. So he decided to show you.

The two of you walked backwards stumbling around the room like a couple of idiots until you felt Daryl hit something and he fell down to sit on your bed breaking the kiss. He placed his hands on your hips and looked at you. It was weird that all he had to do was squint up at you for you to see that it hurt him when he saw you letting Negan touch you. Even if it was just your hand. You reached out and ran your hand through his soft hair, pushing it out of his face. He let his head fall forward to rest on your stomach. You just rested your hands on the back of his neck and played with his long hair. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know that you…” What, liked you? Wanted you? What exactly was it that was going on right now?

He picked his head up and looked up at you. “I didn’t either. Not until I saw…” he didn’t finish his sentence and when his eyes grew dark he didn’t have to.

“Negan made you jealous?” you asked. He nodded and pulled your hips toward him, silently asking you to come closer. So you moved to straddle his lap. He slid his hands up your back making you sigh before your lips met again. The two of you made out like a couple of teenagers for ten minutes before you broke apart for a breather. “This is nice.” You said from where you lay with your head on Daryl’s shoulder while your hands traced the lines of his abs. He picked your hand up and placed his palm against yours, comparing the sizes of your hands. “I don’t want to ruin the moment or anything, but I have to know…what does this mean for us?” you felt his head turn to look at you so you looked up at him.

“What do ya mean?” he asked and you shrugged.

“I mean, are we still just friends, friends with benefits or…are we something more?” you asked sliding your hand that was still pressed against his to the side to lace your fingers together. “I guess I’m asking you to put a label on us.”

Daryl hummed and turned his eyes back to your hands. You did to and you watched as he grabbed your right hand and pulled a ring off that you always wore on your right ring finger. You wanted to ask what he was doing, but you just watched. He picked up your left hand and placed it on your left ring finger. Butterflies started soaring in your stomach and flew up to your chest. “Not askin’ ya to marry me. It’s just there to hold the place if we ever decide to tie the knot one day.” He said and you turned your eyes to his and smiled broadly. He smiled back before another makeout session ensued.

“Wow, I’m surprised Daryl let you come back down here after the way he pulled you out of here yesterday.” Negan said when you walked in with his breakfast of fresh cow’s milk and stale cereal. You ignored him and handed him the styrofoam bowl and plastic spoon. “You are aware that you put your ring on the wrong hand this morning aren’t you?”

“It’s not on the wrong hand.” You humored him with a reply as you sat down and started putting the finishing touches on the drawing of Neagan that you couldn’t get from memory.

“Whoa, wait a minute, did you and crossbow get engaged?” he asked around his bite of food and you could hear the smile in his voice without even looking up.

But you had to look up to make sure you had his eye shape right. “It’s a promise ring.” You looked back down and started drawing his eyebrows.

“He gave you your ring as a promise ring?” he asked in confusion.

“It’s not like Alexandria has a jewelry store.” You said flatly not looking up from your work.

He was quiet while he finished eating and you finished drawing. When you were done you flipped the pad over and walked over to the bars to show Negan. “Nice. Looks just like me.”

“Yep, you’ll forever be known as the guy who managed to get life in prison in the middle of an apocalypse.” You popped off and he looked a little hurt. “Sorry, that was a little bitchy.” You said as you flipped the pad closed and moved to the food slot and held out your hand for his empty bowl and spoon. He handed it to you, but didn’t let it go. You looked up at him a little annoyed. “You don’t like sharing, does Daryl?”

“You wish.” You scoffed and jerked the stuff out of his hand.

“You like me and you know it.” He said with a smile.

“You’re full of yourself and you know it.” You said back to him as you left him behind and locked the door to the basement on your way out.

Daryl stood talking to Michonne and a few other people across from the cell that Negan was in and you were aware of Negan’s eyes on you as you walked over to the group. Negan gritted his teeth when he saw Daryl’s arm slide around your waist. He lost again.

Daryl Tags: @jodiereedus22 @mtngirlforever @zzeacat @winchester-angel@moodygrip @beegnc @hells-mistress @lighthope08 @sapphire1727@luisadontcurr @chloebabyboo @ilkaeliseb @twdeadfanfic @ravengalaxia@1lluminaticonfirmed @my-current-fandom-is @nikkiloves-bailey @coffeebooksandfandom @lonewolf471 @gruffle1 @mblaqgi @calumstuffs@beltzboys2015-blog @neontiger007  @lonewolf471 @sourwolf-sterek32 @dixonluvv @dotslabyrinth @kayln97 @art-flirt @beltzboys2015-blog @cbarter

[hey-hamlet]

BNHA AU Ideas : Twin Star Runaways

Also on AO3! 

TL;DR:  On the run from houses they never called home, Bakugo and Izuku make some unlikely friends and make the worlds least conventional steps towards being heroes. 

They'll be amazing.

Bakugo and izuku were a little closer than in canon

when izuku's quirk didnt come in bakugo didnt jump straight to being mean and izuku didnt develop like, most of his issues because his best friend didnt abandon him

but everyone turned against the "quirkless weirdo" and when bakugo didnt leave him? they turned on him too

bakugo was a "villain in the making" or was crazy, scary, or "the weirdo's rabid dog" and he tries to play it off, like it doesnt bother him, but izuku gets angry, not that people are talking shit about him, but that they are coming after bakugo just for being a good person

not getting into canon, but in this au mitsuki is really abusive. inko is absent/neglectful because shes upset her husband divorced her and works nights as a nurse

so, the start of junior high, aged 11 and 12, izuku and katsuki run away because honestly anything is better than what they've been living though

as pretty cute kids they get pity food but they look so young no one will employ them

then they meet Touya, who for the sake of this AU is 17 at the time

so dabi runs into these 2 kids that look the same age as his little brother, one of which tried to blow him up within 20 secs of meeting him and the other was hiding behind a dumpster

and hes just like,,, "shit i cant believe i have 2 little brothers now"

that is cemented when he finds out izuku, hiding behind the dumpster? ya boy had a knife and was katsuki's backup

so dabi shows up where he knows these kids hide, he brings them food bc they are getting really thin, brings a new coat for katsuki bc he didnt have anything, teaches izuku how to use his knife better and sharpens it for him

he tells them about stain about corrupt heroes, and about his dad and katsuki and izuku latch onto this

katsuki's mum wished his quirk was "less violent" and that hed never be a hero because he was too scary and izuku's dad threw him away the second he realized his kid was Quirkless

and so izuku and katsuki decide they want to meet stain

dabi gives them some change and his email so they can contact him if they ever need to, and they set out for hosu (why is stain in hosu even tho it doesnt follow canon timelines? because i like hosu and i like tensei)

so in this au, stain skipped forward a bit, attacking hosu in some of his first rounds of hero purging

izuku and katsuki catch wind of a "cover up" by iidaten but izuku quickly realizes it was faked by another hero agency to try and get iidaten’s funding cut

and then they get a terrible feeling because thats the kinda thing that would cause stain to go after a hero so they end up running across hosu every night, taking turns to try and cover tensei as they look for stain

izuku and katsuki find stain over tensei, about to deliver the final blow and katsuki freezes because, stain is really scary and he has a bad vibe around him that almost made endeavour puke

but izuku throws himself inbetween tensei and stain

and stain is a little annoyed, but mostly impressed this scrawny kid is trying to stand up to him but then izuku tells him the scandal was faked and lays out every detail while hes pouring with tears because "ingenium is a good hero chizome"

and stain is like

wAIT WHY DOES A 10 YEAR OLD KNOW MY NAMe

(the answer? Dot connecting, the UA sports festival, and Steinhal. our boy is a smart cookie!)

at this point katsuki snaps out of his fear and tells stain he'll set off the loudest explosion he can manage if he doesnt step away from "one of the real heroes" and stain is honestly? pretty shook

so he does

and he just kinda, vanishes into the night

and izuku and katsuki swear because thats the guy they have been looking for for 2 weeks and they are out of food money and they just wanna get back to mutsutafu already so they start running after him

by the end they are freezing, 1AM and izuku is honestly worried about katsuki bc he gets cold easier because his quirk makes him sweaty even when he isnt hot and stain just takes pity on these kids and just kinda asks them is they have anywhere to go

izuku starts sobbing again because thats the kinda person he is, and katsuki tries to tell stain to go fuck himself but his teeth are chattering so hard he almost bites his tongue

stain just kinda sighs because god these kids remind him of Touya

and he laughs as izuku deadlifts a complaining katsuki and asks stain where hes gonna take them

also please: a subplot in this is tensei trying to work out who the kids that saved his life were

and he finds hospital records of katsuki and izuku for various brusies and broken bones

and sees that they havent been at school for 3 months, but also sees that no missing reports have been filed

and hes really upset because these kids are his little brothers age

anyway, after stain saves them from freezing they tell him ab how they cant be heroes but they wanted to be like him

and stain tells them they would make great heroes anyway and they cry

(at this point the AU changed from what was going to be a villain duo au into a vigilante au because its Soft AU Hours)

so, when they get back to mustutafu they meet up w dabi who says he has a present for izuku

(dabi said he join the leauge if afo gave izuku a quirk, and afo is interested to see how this goes so he said yes)

he would have joined the league anyway but he wanted to do his honorary little bro a solid if he could

afo was read to give izuku a kinda meh quirk honestly because the kid was going to want to be a hero and thats just bad business sense

then he finds out stain is fond of them and he pauses bc, thats pretty odd

then izuku walks in, is greeted by kurogiri and he bows to him bc hes a polite kid and afo is starting to like this child

izuku then tells shigiraki that he likes his shoes and shigiraki looks pleased with himself

so afo turns on the monitor and says hello and izuku pauses for a second and says

"sensei right? are you hurt? Why else would the video be off… oh sorry! I ramble when im nervous"

and afo just kinda,, "oh lord this child is sharp" so he chats with izuku a while and hears about how kids hurt him for being qurikless and afo kinda relates because people tried to murder him for having a quirk in the first place (i then ran through like 30 quirk ideas trying to work out the one I wanted to give him oops)

all for one gifts him the quirk guardian: can create hard light barriers. the more ambient light at the time of creation, the stronger the construct

he has the quirks perfect counter anyway, blackout: remove all light in a area, so hes not worried.

“where’d u get that quirk izuku”

“….enstranged uncle”

he works with katsuki to create barriers at the moment katsuki lets out explosions to maximise the strength

they start working as vigilanties

these lil baby 12 year olds and dabi is a big concered bro so he gets them some platform boots to make them look taller and masks to hide their voices

they wear big baggy hoodies bc they take them impacts and hide how thin they are

because they work at night they see aizawa a lot and aizawa is kinda confused because they have some pretty legit looking gear (big bro touya) so hes not sure if they are new heroes or not

izuku like, maybe stalked aizawa a little and found out hes a teacher at UA and izuku is so impressed and starstuck over this underground hero

katsuki is just grumbling because hes really impressed too but emotions are lame

izuku gets really hurt and katsuki knows this bitch is in trouble but he doesnt know what to do

katsuki asks eraserhead for help n aizawa is like "what going on??? are you a villain?" and katsuki rips off his mask, and is visible a super underweight 13 year old and aizawa just kinda feels his heart sink

and katsuki is trying not to cry and hes begging aizawa for help and aizawa is like "ahhhh fuuck I have 2 sons now"

vigilantes izuku and katsuki becoming wards of UA bc aizawa found them and has a deep seated hatred of the foster system

and the teachers just kinda accidentally adopt them

they take the ua entrance exam and manage to tie for first place, bakugo is all villain points and izuku got 50/50 rescue/villain points

and they have their letters playing at the same time as they hide in an alley way and the both start crying

because they really can be heroes

[determined-magi]

"Thannor." The new voice is sickly sweet. "I got a question for ya. Why's it that you let that BEAST of a child anywhere near you? You know nothing about him, not truly, words aside. Can you trust what a pathological liar tells you? He could be lying, he could be trying to get into your good side and betray you. He's a liar, a thief, and a traitor to his people. Why would he be loyal to a group of MAGES who remind him of everything he was trying to escape for gods know how long?"

“ Ye think fer a second it hadn’t gone through my mind? Ye wants to rile me up, good job, but not gonna work the way you want it to, ye shite. And bare with me I’m gonna tell ye why and ye’s gonna be stuck on this long ass rant, and then I will fuckin cut that tounge and throat of yers, and ye’s not going to have a say on it. ”

“ One of very few get us. And ironically this “beast of a child” has managed to treat us, or feing to treat us, more humanely than a lot of humans on our own kindgom. Of course it feels too fucking good, because we’ve got many on our kingdom that do this already, and speak of us the same way you speak of him. “ He lets a low, rumbling growl from his troat. If the anon could hear it, he would hear the already hissing magic growing rather agitated behind the mage’s back. Like an animal who has had their territory crossed, tail snapping to its sides, ears pinned back and bearing fangs as a warning. “ Why ye think I snapped at him as a fuckin lion? ‘Course I don’t trust ‘im wholy. Hell, I am terrified. How well has it gone to ours with trusting others that hadn’t aged nor grew arounds us? “

“ Agar has been cut, burn and hurt many times in thirty years, he’s got the body scars of an old veteran, in about THIRTY YEARS, the amount of scars he’s got should be on a war mage of about Braigon’s age, not him. Gilrin has been used by the fucking council and their dogs for years, Thanneth taken advantage of and granted, fucking Belle, for fuck’s sake! ‘is own kingdom, ‘is own family, they all shunned him like they shun us. Captains had demoted Braigon in his younger days to escape a scold, and Rho? He’s sent people he thought as friends to jail for it, not one, twice or thrice, let me tell ye. “ Hands claw at his face, frustrated, then at his neck as if he wanted to tear off his own bones and throat. Before punching a nearby object, it hurts, but it is better to take it off at something than just keep the feeling there, anything to let off the sensation that kept  torturing him when made aware of it. “ And ‘ol me? Had people pretend things only to snap at me, fuckin outraged because I did not give them their due, time and time again. And when I express myself like I fuckin want? I get knocked, punished and spoken like if I was a rabid, mindless, bloodthristy animal. Then said my feral behavior has no place on their civilized society. Of fuckin course I’m going to be wary to some extent, of course it will feel too damn good to have someone like him around to be real. “

“ Sometimes I wish I had chosen to kick him out then, it would make life way easier. “ He then simply sits on the ground, face burrying on his hands as he lets one of the longest groans he’s ever had. “ Wouldn’t have to deal with this, stagnancy was far easier. I wouldn’t have to fear change, I wouldn’t have to doubt as many things as I do now, I wouldn’t feel like I was about to jump from the edge to the abyss in a blind leap of faith. I wouldn’t have to allways have the nagging feel in the back of my mind that there is something off, then be torn between trying to stop that feel, and stop what causes it. But then I would be again a miserable fool, with greats amounts of money, and little self-fullfillment found in life other than the few people and things he enjoys only in the smallest of dosis, stagnant an’ likely bound to suffer worse ‘cause he’s clearly in the wrong somewhere in there, which only now I’m coming to fuckin see. I ‘ave someone more than to an extent my magic isn’t allways upset around with, which is a big breather, let me tell ye. “

“ Of course not knowing anything is terrifying, when trust is given, they can use what they know against ye, ye? Ye don’t have anything, ye’r left helpless and the only thing ye’s got is a bite and bark, while they have a whole arsenal. ‘Course part of me would instinctually show distrust when experiencing on an unknow situation, outside of my own comfort zone, and while feeling exposed… so ‘course I don’t trust him, not entirely… “

“ Which ye know what? It thoroughly sucks! The one thing that feels good also doesn’t feel so! It is fuckin rediculous. I want to improve, and I want to go further on in my own self-development. “ He wants to pull his hair off, but doesn’t instead he just just stands again, then moves to hit his head against a wall. He seems clearly distressed somewhere in the mess of emotions he’s showing currently. “ But the worst of it? I find myself wanting to believe it, I want to believe what feels like a thorough lie and danger to be good, That’s change isn’t too good to be true. That who I hired ‘s in fact the person I hired, that ‘ey  ‘re a kid that did not come to my damn shop with ulterior motives, someone that, while problematic on some areas, is still a good kid just stumbling to my workplace in some way. And he in fact means well, and that I can grow fond of ‘im and trust him as a friend and dear apprentice, alike Gil does with her own students as if some were to her children. “

“ And ye know? Ye’s right on that last part, we are the least probable people for him to trust, the least rightfull! “ He moves away to start punching the object, barehanded, the alloy imbedded on his skin re-opening wounds and quickly painting it red, it hurts a lot, but does he care either? Not really, he needs an outting, something help him vent it off, something to take it on, something to exhaust him, in every concievable way. Which sadly to him doesn’t work very well, as soon enough he finds himself left with it being a useless mess. “ I can’t for shite understand why he’s here, why he’s stuck so long, and what could be the reasoning to want to do this, and that upsets me, but unlike some shites here, I.am.not.prying… “

“ And ye, we shouldn’t trust it. But ye know what? ” He growls again. He wishes to trust him, but… he won’t. Never blindly. Trust was a two way, and so long as one was closed, it wouldn’t be truly that, it could never be that. Will, however, be patient, await for it to show. and if not? Well, over time it shall show. The thought feels… bittersad-painfull, to him. “ What we do, what I do, won’t be chosen by a piece of shite like ye. I won’t pry the reasons behind, not like ye fuckin shites do to rile people up. Whatever reasons he’s got, are his. And ye know fucking what too? I changed my mind. ”

He moves in towards to grab the anon, before grabbing what he believes to be a sternum-like structure. Fingers burrying deep into the person’s flesh. Then he pulls, taking a good chunk of flesh, connective tissue and probably organs with it, leaving a bloodly mess behind and staining his clothes. then moves of to rip the person’s throat and cervical spine-like structure. He wasn’t going to let the person go away, no, he riled him up, ruined his day, touched matters he shouldn’t, knew things he shouldn’t. And he certainly wouldn’t let them have the chance to use what he’s just said, there is only six persons he will confide in this like this, and this fool wasn’t one of them.

And what that meant? Death, flat as that in his mind.

He stands there for a moment, before dropping the chunck he was gripping and letting the most frustrated of groans, followed soon by a growl. Oh, they fucking riled him and it ended with him killing someone. Look at his clothes! They are a mess, his nerves are a mess, the ground’s a mess, and everyone’s going to scold them on it. And he fucking hurt his hands AGAIN while on it.

Got fucking damn it, he hates getting riled up over things like these.

Sometimes he wishes he didn’t feel anything.

@cosmosfated

[spockandawe]

So you’ve heard Spock is the actual literal devil

Have you heard that I’m a terrible person? A plagiarist? Have you been told that I’m only into transformers at all because I wanted to make this one random guy unhappy? If you’ve been told that, you’ve probably also been told that a year and a half later, I’m still making fanworks just to upset him. You might have even heard that shhhh, don’t disagree with Spock on anything, or they’ll hunt you down and harass you.

Right, okay. This is one hell of a saga that I will attempt to tell in as compressed a form as possible. It’s a lot. Years ago, back in HS, there was this one guy who policed the hell out of one of the character tags. I’m going to call him C. He’d pressure people not to make the content they were making, decry the hateful people reading with a malicious eye who thought the character would ever do anything bad (the character was a creep). And because being obnoxious wasn’t bad enough, if you didn’t cave to his demands, he just might do things like start whisper campaigns about how you support rape, casually out you as a survivor, cute little things like that.

This is not a story about that guy.

This is a story about C’s one-time attack dog, eventual boyfriend, and current ex. We’ll go ahead and call him R. I’ve tried real hard to avoid namedropping on my blog before, but could people find him from this? Probably. Have I stopped caring? Absolutely.

TL;DR, unsubstantiated accusations of serial harassment are a little questionable when they’re coming from someone with a years-long, extensively documented history of serial harassment and a personal grudge against me.

Cut for length.

Edit 7/2/2017: R has posted that he regrets making these posts about me, and admits that he said things that were out of line. And he’s stated that he’s going to try to do better in the future. I genuinely, truly appreciate that. I’m leaving this post up because there have been lies about me floating around for a while and I reserve the right to defend myself, but I really do appreciate that.

Oh balls, none of this makes sense without backstory (I’m so sorry)

If you think I suck or my work sucks, that’s fine! You do you, go enjoy the things that make you happy.

If you think I’m the devil because this one guy told you about my evil, evil past and all my terrible misdeeds, without anything at all to back up his words? You can ask me. I don’t bite, and oh lordy do I have receipts.

To be clear, R is totally allowed to hate me! I don't care. I don't care if he hates my writing, I don't care if he hates me as a person. But now he's escalated to spreading lies about me, and people are believing him, and I’m not enough of a doormat to let that just stand.

And I’m going to cheat a little. Here’s a memo with the cliffs notes version (not the original memo, I made a copy with C’s urls cropped out since he hasn’t attacked anyone in a long while). Warning, digging any distance into this turns up violent fantasies, violent sexual fantasies, creepy interactions with a minor, and lots more, it’s all really, really unpleasant. Evidence is thoroughly documented, please tread with care.

You would not believe how truncated that is compared to the reality.

Now, the worst of this came via C. Who has calmed down a lot these days, and I’m really happy that’s the case. Good for him. I hope his life continues in a direction where he doesn’t find it necessary to do this stuff.

Lucky for me, R was standing by to pick up the slack.

It doesn’t show up as much in the memo, which is mostly C-focused, but R was standing by C this whole time, defending his right to spread around private information about someone’s abuse history, sending nasty messages on the other guy’s behalf, and much,much more. it’s long, it’s awful, it’s unpleasant. R personally hurt people in some significant ways that I don’t want to link directly, for their sake. He expressed deep remorse a few times, but it never stuck.

Here’s my personal favorite quote from R. He’s speaking to the CSA survivor that C casually outed (with information given to him in confidence), and who they’d been running a long, long whisper campaign against, and who was understandably a bit upset over the whole thing:

oh go wank to your own tears [name]

#and get your sympathizers to help #nasty fucking people #maybe if you cry enough youll be able to go into second grade in the fall #ooc

Said, again, to a CSA survivor they outed and harassed. That person is such a sweetheart, and this screencap still infuriates me.

The first time I saw C pick a fight he had lots of friends. Shockingly, as he did things like loudly fantasize about how he wants to mutilate people and rant about how autistic people should die, those friends mostly drifted away. I know one person had a friend even help them stage a faux relationship-ending fight, so they could be sure they’d be able to completely cut and run from C. R stuck with him, though. Eventually they even started dating.

‘Spock followed R into transformers to harass him and stalks his favorite characters just to harass him more’

Then, transformers. Here, let me show you the first post (by R) that ever brought MTMTE to my attention. I spent years being aggressively uninterested in transformers, but this caught my eye

and honestly, ppl (adults too!!!) shipping someone who has the mentality of a child and is quite glaringly lacking a world of experiences and general understanding of things outside of ‘good’ and ‘bad’, with an adult, is just. very alarming and gross to me.

and honestly, the fact that there is a large portion of people who want him to become romantically (and sexually!!!) involved with either one of two fucking adults in canon, and hell, esp those defending it with ‘hes an adult too tho!!’ is really gross.

you can pretend all you want that hes ‘an adult’ because his body is, but theres no way jro didnt intent to code him as a child. stop fetishizing children lmao,

#pedophilia -/-/- #cygate -/-/- #if someone comes at me screaming ‘rule 38′ im gonna shove them in a locker

I didn’t know transformers, but I was pretty sure this was some straight-up bullshit.

(but don’t worry, he ships it now! no hypocrisy here, no sir)

It’s “really gross” to ship this adult with other adults. Mm. Given the reasonableness of the claims these guys have made in the past, and given their extensive history of harassing people over those claims, I hopped to the wiki to check it out. I read a bit about the comic and the plot, and all of it sounded so fascinating that I just had to give the comic a try.

Reader, I married it.

I shotgunned MTMTE 1-47 in two days, started doing fanworks right out of the gate, and I’ve never looked back. A lot of my art was cygate, because come on, the comic wants you to ship it so bad, my first readthrough ended with issue 47, and that was the first ship I’d ever read about for the series, even before I dove in.

Now, both these characters punch me right in the heart, in some painfully personal ways. Tailgate’s the more relevant one here, but I don’t even know if I could do justice to the emotions both of them give me.

I’m still not a fan of how R’s lies about me have edged me into needing to say this in public, but okay. I’m developmentally delayed. It’s been a rough ride. And Tailgate hits me in some of those spots so hard it just takes my breath away. I’ve got a lot of baggage over not being a real adult, and not in the funny oh-no-how-do-taxes-work way, more like an extended months-long meltdown my first year of college because I can tell that my friends are years ahead of me and I don’t know how to even start catching up, and just existing, as myself, is humiliating.

All of my relationship milestones have come painfully, painfully late. The whole thing is still one awful emotional bruise. I hate it, and I hate how easy it is to convince myself that yeah, of course you don’t actually deserve to be treated as an adult and you never will. Just look at you. So then it is unbelievably important to me that I can see someone someone who is like me, being treated as a legitimate adult, and being able to have an adult relationship.

Hearing that shipping someone like me is essentially pedophilia is the opposite of that.

But he ships it now, so everything is fine :)

Yeah, you know what? Another fucking receipt.

uGHGH im so tired of all the rabid cy// /gat// //e fans like even cy’s giving em a look like ‘leave my fucking child alone’

#i just #im hoping jro has some taste tho and doesnt make an adult date a child #and if not im hoping the outcome blows over soon bc im so tired of seeing people defend pedophilia #pedophilia -/-/-

Parental.

This continued even after JRO explicitly confirmed Tailgate was an adult.

Bonus ableism: shipping Whirl (another character who hits me way too hard) isn’t okay either. Even though there isn’t the excuse of ‘but he only lived three years--’ No, at that point, you’re saying that an adult who fails to adult correctly does not count, and isn’t allowed to have romantic relationships. It makes my skin crawl, and it is an issue which is very personally and directly important to me.

So some of my cygate was porn from the start (it’s what I write. it’s what I draw.), and some of the porn was made because I was upset over discourse that says someone like me needs to be treated as a child. I played with cywhirlgate too, because omg how could I not, and some of that was porn as well. It was ages ago, so I don’t remember the details for every little thing I made. But when I saw someone saying that Cyclonus and Tailgate had a parental relationship, I’m sure that helped nudge me in that direction. Maybe R thinks I should have channeled my emotions by starting a whisper campaign to exclude him from fandom spaces. But I think my way of working through bad emotions might have been a little healthier than that.

So when R accuses me of making cygate content to spite him? Half true. Just true enough to be real fucking dishonest. R spent a nice long time insisting that cygate was pedophilia. I channeled my outrage over that ableism into fan creations.

I didn’t attack him. I talked about him some – on a private forum, with people who’d already been aware of him and had been watching him and C hurt people for years, plural. I haven’t told people on tumblr any real details about him until now. And R still is happy to talk about how it was his toxic ex’s right to post torture/rape/murder porn vent fic about actual people.

Tell me, how exactly am I in the wrong?

Bonus pettiness: I posted some cywhirlgate porn. The next day, R vaguely whined about robot pedophilia and turned around and wrote some obviously-a-response cywhirlgate. Where it was super platonic and the text explicitly said it was super platonic and it even had platonic thigh nuzzling. With two “children” involved. Of course I turned around and wrote more fic of my own, because jesus h christ that made my skin crawl. You want to play this game? I guarantee I can write faster than you, let’s do this. (he did not follow through on that)

I’d also like to say that forgetting inconvenient little details like this is a thing with R. Hard to call me terrible for writing spitefic when you write it yourself.

A history of Spock’s personal involvement

Let’s backtrack a tiny bit. You may notice I am up to my elbows in this nonsense for no clear reason.

I was friends with some of the people C was taking shots at, and I was unfortunate enough to believe his original smear campaign about that one artist (I’m still ashamed about that). I cared about a number of people C was trying to hurt. I think one or two fanworks of mine upset him, but he already had loads of targets. I kept tabs on him and R, because anxiety is the gift that just keeps giving.

Eventually, C fantasized about wanting to put my former datemate’s hand through a meat grinder (ey wrote a fic that portrayed his fave in a negative light). And R defended his right to do that.

The person he posted about is still feeling the effects of that incident. I’m still feeling the effects of that. And it wasn’t even directed at me, just someone I care deeply about.

R has recently posted that ‘oh my goodness, C sure was awful, remember when he posted this thing about a meat grinder and how unreasonable it was?’ Thanks buddy, glad you noticed, now just go ahead and keep on blaming me for the aftereffects of what your boyfriend did, and what you defended.

After that, it was months before I could properly look away from either of their blogs.

C posted extensively about trying to track down the street address of his ~enemies~ (including the one whose genitals he fantasized about mutilating). He posted about how autistics should die. He had skype chats about wanting to do amateur brain surgery on people. All while posting very often about finding real addresses.

Yeah, it’s more than a year later, and every so often I get a stab of anxiety and have to head off to double check on what these two are up to.

I will repeat that C has been pretty chill lately. He’s got a career he’s aiming for. Good for him, go find success, please don’t slip back into being an internet bully. It’s sad and upsetting to see R echoing some of the early patterns of his ex, and it’s so strange to see me labeled as his own personal enemy.

‘Spock will totally come harass you too’ and/or various accusations of ableism

So there are some things I did in the mix in this history that I regret. Occasionally, I went out and flipped through the blogs of C and R’s friends, seeing if maybe they’d had said something in their notes, did they have any vagueblogs C liked, did they post about— It got unreasonable. I admit that. Anxiety was at the root of it, but it absolutely got unreasonable. And also it is a massive time sink, and I can’t remember the last time I bothered with it. I enjoy life much more when anxiety and paranoia issues don’t have their claws in me. This hasn’t been an issue in a very long time.

I came down hard on some of the kinfeels and system stuff too, which I do walk back a bit. C’s approach was… hahaha. It was something. And he was my intro to the kin and system paradigms. I saw R talking about C’s approach being unreasonable too, pretty recently. So that was an unfortunate bit of poison in how I processed the next people I met who did that sort of thing. I don’t do kin stuff, but I get it. And DID may not strictly apply to all systems, by the formal diagnostic criteria, but I’ve learned there are plenty of other dissociative disorders out there. And I met people who were multiples and who did kin things that weren’t these two guys. Which helped a LOT.

But the big one, hmmm. C wrote a fic. The idea was interesting, but the execution frustrated me. Everyone but the main lead felt so… flat. Everyone was constantly cruel to the main, for no reason. I saw a way to riff on the original text while staying true to its shape, and writing my bad emotions out is also a major, major thing I do to cope. Now, my big thing is that I should have asked before I remixed. I’d been thinking in terms of, y’know, transformative fanworks. Even with authors like Anne McCaffrey and Anne Rice, who fought against fandom, people have still felt that it should be allowed, even against their wishes. So I wrote the remix. I gave full credit on ao3 in the ‘inspired by’ box, linked to the original with positive words, the whole shebang.

The guy was still furious, and… that’s fair. I thought I’d written a thing on self-sabotage that was pretty sympathetic and compelling, and the self-sabotage actually drew a lot on my own personal history. But I gave the main flaws he strongly disagreed with, and I didn’t ask for permission. I get why he was/is angry over it.

I’ve been a fixture on their shitlists ever since :P

It’s remarkable, even while R posts now about ‘oh my god, remember how C wrote the creepiest things?’, I’m still the one who’s the the actual worst, for being skeeved out by the creepy things and finding a constructive way to deal with it. R’s controlling ex gets full freedom when it comes to vent fic, even when it’s about wallowing in torturing, raping, and murdering an avatar for a real person (the original one they harassed!), or punching someone in the face until they agree to be your friend (another artist these guys targeted). But R’s position seems to be that only C is allowed to vent (even if it’s genital mutilation fantasies), and I’m definitely not.

Oh, and R has now expanded this remix into me totally having a consistent pattern of stealing ideas and plagiarism and so many remixes that are obviously done as revenge on anyone who pisses me off. So that’s nice.

So R hates your writing. Is that seriously why this post exists?

Ha, no. Let’s look at the concrete things R is saying. Here, let me post a little sampling of evidence.

These aren’t just things he’s shouting into the void, people have responded saying wow, I never knew that! These are lies that people are believing about me. And then yesterday, June 30, 2017, he warned a friend not to disagree with my meta, or I’d come harass them. A friend I’m aggressively leaving out of this, just as I’m leaving out other responses, because these people don’t deserve to be dragged into R’s bullshit.

Let’s have bullet points. Some of these are the silly spock-is-bad-at-writing complaints. Those are here because this whole mess is pretty fucking depressing and the ridiculous claims make me laugh, but these are all things he says.

Spock is evil – You know what, he’s not calling people pedophiles, which is a step up. I’ll take it.

Spock is a plagiarist – I remixed one fic with full credit, said only good things about the original, and linked to it in extra places so that people would have extra opportunities to click through and check it out. I arguably remixed inappropriately, but that’s not the same thing. Words have definitions. If I’m a plagiarist, so is everyone who’s ever written a fanfic.

Spock is something something mean when people disagree – I don’t even know, man. I’m actually shockingly conflict-averse. Is this because I make walls of text and explain why I hold opinions at great length? I enjoy talking about a thing I love. I’m autistic, I’m hyperverbal, and this is my special interest, so is it that I talk a lot? That’s the best I can do. I’ve talked about things I disagree with on a private forum, in which case mister pot has had a lot of fun in public on twitter, not only talking shit, but also spreading outright untruths. Maybe he wants to rethink this one.

Spock will come harass you if you disagree – You need to back the heck down, pal.

Spock’s meta/fic/characterization is bad and they should feel bad – Hahaha, fite me. He won’t, because I can articulately defend myself at significant length, and his criticisms seem to stop at ‘spock sucks’, but hey.

Spock used ableist language about Whirl - I... what? This one confuses me and makes me laugh so it stays here. Also, holy double standards, batman.

Spock is only into transformers to harass R – I checked out transformers because I was pretty sure R was being disgustingly ableist (he was). I stayed in transformers because I adore it. I had to adore it a lot to make me willing to share fandom space with these two. My god, I have better things to do with my life than spend all my time on something that bores me just to annoy one asshole on the other side of the internet. I’d ask if he thinks I spent dozens of painstaking hours cross-stitching Starscream just to bother him, but….. yep, pretty sure he does.

Spock goes after all of R’s favorite characters to upset him – R latches on to just about every interesting and/or sympathetic character that shows up. When he was dating C, they covered most of the cast between them. I don’t care who R likes best because I don’t agree with his opinions. I tend to stay away from his opinions because I don’t like reading things that bother me. This is asnine. I’m only allowed to like the characters R despises, I guess.

Spock makes fanworks for things R likes just to make him see them – Oh my god, I don’t caaaaaare. I write about things that interest me, unless I’m venting. Say, venting about the way R and his ex have deliberately hurt a shockingly high number of people I care about. ‘Spock made rodistar because I liked it--’ I made it because I wrote a thing about their parallels, and shipping was the obvious next step. R isn’t that important to me. Promise.

This is just exhausting, man. The anxiety bugs had been dying down, and it had been ages since I checked out this guy’s anything. C, who drove the whole initial blowup that led to this, has been quiet and chill on tumblr. But R has learned from his ex’s old example and has been having fun spreading lies about me.

In conclusion

Some fun history.

R was 18 when he told a CSA survivor upset about being outed and harassed to wank using their tears for lube.

He was older than that when he defended C’s right to post about wanting to mutilate someone’s genitals (for the crime of saying C’s logic didn’t make sense).

He was older than that when he complained about that person’s spouse being ‘vicious’ for reacting badly to C’s genital mutilation fantasy.

He was older than that when he nodded along as C called autistic people retards and said they should die.

He was older than that when he talked about being happy that someone he disliked was triggered, and nodded along when C fantasized about that person drinking bleach.

And he was older than that when he defended C, his twenty-something boyfriend, against the thirteen-year-old that C had been having incredibly inappropriate conversations with, despite skype log proof and everything.

And despite all this, I’m still the bad guy, because I didn’t think what they were doing was okay. I’m the bad guy for being upset by C's actions, even though... R is now upset by C’s actions. The ways I responded to C were inexcusable. My only motivation is to hurt people. Every thing I did that ever upset them still means I’m terrible, even though R is saying this while he’s busy posting about how awful C is. And this all means that he needs to warn his friends not to catch my attention, or I’ll come harass them.

So, I’m tired.

I’m very tired.

I’m glad he’s trying to grow past that history. Good. Maybe he can do that without making up a story about how I’m unrepentant villain who lives for villainy and who only takes joy in causing him pain. I’m sure it helps him, because it’s a story that brushes aside the shit he did that he regrets, and makes his past less painful to think about. But that doesn’t mean I’m okay with him telling lies about me.

I don’t know why I’m the one boogeyman he has left (I kid, it’s because I’m in transformers, and because he thinks I’m popular. he harps on it a lot, and it’s weird for everyone). I mean, whatever. I’ve aggressively avoided publishing drama details on here for a very long time. But there are two blog tags, miscellaneous other untagged blog content, three forum threads, and hundreds of pages of skype logs with hard evidence of this bullshit.

I’m pretty sure that if he tries to defend himself, one, he’ll place some blame on his ex. That’s fair. C was pretty darn controlling and demanding. But R is still absolutely responsible for his own actions, and is especially responsible for the harm he personally caused. He’ll talk about how it’s bullshit to pull up all these receipts from so very long ago. In that case, his receipts for me (whatever he even has) are equally old, so aren’t they null and void? No, because Spock is the devil. And it’s not so much bullshit if he’s clearly learned nothing, and has gone back to spreading outright falsehoods about people.

To be clear, a lot of the lies he told about me were told a while back. Weeks to a few months to a year. I was letting it sit, because I’d really, really hoped this was over. Yesterday, June 30, 2017, he warned a friend not to publicly disagree with my meta or I’d come and harass them.

It’s been three years since I first saw him doing this. I’ve watched him hurt a lot of people, and I’ve watched him admit, multiple times, that he has hurt people. I thought he’d learned to stop following these toxic patterns. Apparently he has not.

Edit 7/2/2017: To repeat the edit up above, R has said he regrets posting these things about me, and that he's going to try to avoid slipping into this in the future. I very much appreciate that.

[thedegenerateasexual]

just for funsies i checked the air dates of the seminal episodes 3.19 Letharia Vulpina and 3.22 De-Void and they are february 17 2014 and march 10 2014

with that knowledge in hand here are some fun facts, come down nostalgia lane w/ me:

i started shipping this stupid thing on march 10th 2014 and i can feel nice and superior about being here ALMOST from the get-go

prior to 3.19 only SIXTEEN ENTIRE FICS for that pairing had been published

when i got on AO3 immediately after the ep aired to look for derek/chris there were 23 fics published

there are now 158, but most of them have kn*tting or other ships/tropes i don't like, so i'm STILL #suffering

i've now read the first Ever derek/chris fic and it's not actually too bad! tho i prefer them set after allison dies just to spare her the trauma

less than one short month later i got distracted by some whackjob named barnes and his pretty blonde wife which is probably why it took me this long to get around to writing this shit

speaking of that shit i wrote, i sighed longingly about wanting to catch up on some Bad TV back on may 1st, and had the entirety of the show on my HD by may 3rd

on may 10th i confessed to reading some Bad TV Fic (i'll be honest, i tried some st*rek furst because they write a good derek, but...i can’t deal he’s a MINOR so eventually i went back to looking for fic of my Real Preference. sadly there was very little)

i half-heartedly began an outline file of the fic i sorta-kinda thought about writing on may 30th, but it was just a list of bullet points about my particular interpretations of their characters, no real plot other than "catch kate together"

on june 12th, while making a sandwich, i was ruminating on chris argent and trying to decide if i could make him more interesting to me since currently his main role was just being kind of horrified at his sister and a good character that does not make, when Suddenly i had an idea about a story he tells in season 1

i immediately flew to my computer, messaged @marcusanthotius, and said something like "emily can i tell you about this idea i just had it might be a little bit of a text wall sorry" and she was like "sure" and then i told her and over the course of the conversation she went from "damn that sounds neat" to "I'M SO MAD I DON'T EVEN GO HERE BUT I REALLY WANT TO READ THIS NOW"

i know it was on june 12th while making a sandwich because i saved the conversation for future reference so i wouldn't lose the idea and i said "suddenly while making a sandwich my brain threw me this idea" and she said "it's always mid sandwich or laundry isn't it" which is a very correct observation

(completely forgot until i reread it that one of my points of beef with chris's first version of the story came from someone nitpicking wildlife facts on tvtropes, which i had been reading the previous night - not only do bats that bite not live anywhere near but that's not actually how rabid dogs act; the story was probably done that way to make an obvious comparison to werewolves, factual shit be damned. considering how the show always points out otherwise when the wildlife is acting weird, like when wolves or bioluminescent fireflies show up where they aren't supposed to)

(spoilers: it worked & he’s pretty interesting to me now)

anyway she was like "not to be a bad influence but you should write this" so i made my story doc on june 12th also, but it stayed empty for five days because i was busy perfecting my outline and pacing and shit

on june 18th, 3 years, 3 months, and 9 days after 3.22 De-Void aired, i started writing thing. talk about playing the long game

i poked and prodded at it off and on until june 21, which was my birthday, and got distracted by other things (presents!) and kind of half-gave-up on it because Sex Scenes Are Hard To Write, Okay

on july 9th the 6B trailer dropped. the very last thing i said before i watched it was "yeah i heard a rumor derek's coming back but i'm not holding my breath lol" which frankly is fucking iconic

im gonna take a small moment to send silent appreciation for those 5 seconds of derek hale footage in which i was truly, unironically, living my BEST possible life

NEEDLESS TO SAY i was pretty fucking excited bc my wordcount for that day was 1800

(started this blog on july 14th which just goes to show you im incapable of writing something without also blogging about it, posted this gem one week later on the 21st which goes to show i’m bad at having a secret ship, though i guess keeping it a secret for 3+ years isn’t too bad)

& the rest is history i wrote over 1k for nearly every single day between then & aug8, which is when i finished my rough draft, posted that shit 24h later

which means from conception to posting it took 71 days but from the time i wrote the first word to the time i wrote the last one, 51 days, just under 2 months, and if we don't count the piddling done prior to the 6B trailer it's more like 31 days

anyway those were the best 31 days i've had all year, wouldn't trade 'em for anything

[stinkrascal]

Little controversial, but a lot of fun. What are your sim s' toxic traits? Asking all of my favourite story tellers. Let's get deep

omg YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSS please i love talking about controversial things lets goooooooooo <3

vlad - he’s a very controlling and overbearing person, honestly. he’s the type of person who trusts his knowledge above everyone else’s and feels he’s the most capable in any given situation, therefore he feels it’s only right that he’s in charge, no matter the circumstance. he’s wise, yes, but after centuries of believing this of himself, his wisdom has warped to unabashed pride, and he finds it difficult to trust another’s capabilities over his own because of it. i like to think this ties into why he’s fairly codependent in his relationships; he needs to feel as though he’s the one providing for, guiding, and therefore “controlling” his relationships, he needs to feel needed, so he seeks out people who feed into that desire, people he feels are “misguided” who need a wise, proper hand to bring them to normalcy. you know, someone like him, the spitting image of normalcy, seeking out impressionable people in an attempt to satiate his intense desire to be needed. like sir have u ever heard of therapy? LMAOOO

breanna - she’s laidback to a fault and oftentimes irresponsible, someone who rarely considers the outcomes of her decisions and someone who ignores the telltale signs given to her. this manifests in a lot of careless, reckless behavior and poor decision making skills. like, for instance, if vlad reminds breanna that the water bill must be paid by x day? you best bet the water will be shut off because queen, irresponsible as she is, forgot to send the check. if she promises to bring you to your doctor’s appointment, you best bet that the morning of you’re gonna call her only to discover she didn’t realize your doctor’s appointment was Today and she is currently stoned asf and cannot operate her vehicle, to which you will reply Breanna It’s 8 AM Why Are You Smoking At 8 AM to which she will apologize and cry and hang up and fall asleep. much like vlad, i like to think this ties into her own codependency issues, as she feels she’s, in essence, unable to properly, or rather, responsibly care for herself, and must rely on someone else to do this for her. she enables his controlling nature by relying on him for most things, and in return he enables her immaturity by providing for her unconditionally. isn’t that, like, super fucked up lmaooooo? like, it’s the sims universe u know, so take all of this with a grain of salt, bc like in the context of my silly sims 4 legacy all of these codependency issues honestly amount to, like, breanna being a happy and uncritical stoner tradwife and vlad being the one who pays the bills and drives. it’s not actually that serious u know. but when you think about it critically and apply it to like real-world scenarios n consequences n whatever... it’s gross as fuck <3 you guys need therapy <3

lucien - like vlad, he’s fairly prideful, as he feels he’s the most knowledgeable and capable of any given situation, but more so than that, he feels the need to show off his intelligence by testing others’ knowledge. he also feels the need to lecture those he feels aren’t as knowledgeable as he is; often he doesn’t realize he’s doing it. he’ll basically mansplain to you for hours, if you don’t keep him in check. also, his ego usually gets the best of him, and he can’t help but find himself better than those he views as unintelligent. it can come off a little classist at times, and this is something which has been brought to his attention in the past, something he wishes to alleviate in his further interactions. it’s a work in progress. ;-;

gen - their main issue is that they’ve a difficult time understanding and empathizing with other people, primarily women. i like to think this comes from their overall discomfort within themselves, whether that discomfort revolves around their personality, their gender identity, or their apathy towards life. women in particular are difficult for gen to empathize with, as it is that gen makes an effort to distance themselves from women, most likely a consequence of their discomfort with their assigned gender. lashing out at the “thing” they wish to distance themselves from is a simple, quick way to tell your peers, I Am Not This Thing! you don’t wish to be perceived as a women? vehemently hate all of that which is considered womanly, and maybe you’ll stand a chance against your audience. that’s... gen’s way of looking at it, at least. it’s not healthy, and gen realizes this by now, but so far it’s not caused too much of a hindrance on their life, save for all the girlfriends they can’t get because of their shitty misogynistic streak, so they’re not too bothered. i can promise you as they grow more comfortable with themselves, they will eventually drop their mean streak. i know gen’s been a misogynist for, like, two years now lmaooo ;-;

carlile - much like his mother, he’s extremely irresponsible. he forgets important dates, he often misplaces his belongings and the belongings of others, he can hardly be trusted to cook without forgetting the stove’s on then burning the house to the ground. he’s also rather bratty, especially when he’s hungry. idk i’m blanking on carlile honestly his toxic trait is being perfect <3

nikolai - he has a hard time establishing boundaries with others, so he often finds himself in situations he finds uncomfortable, merely because he can’t say no to anything. you can usually tell when he’s uncomfortable, as he wears the expression well on his face, but even then, he’ll bite his tongue and carry onwards. worst of all, though, he’ll be upset with you if you’re the one who suggested the plans, even if he’s the one who agreed to the situation despite not wanting to attend in the first place.

klaus - he doesn’t expect anything from anybody, and he feels that all people should feel this way about each other, as no expectations means no one can get hurt. this also means, however, that klaus’ effort put into everything he does is fairly low, and he doesn’t often impress people with his lazy, myopic attitude. he’s self-dependent to a fault, wanting to do most things by himself without considering the help of others, as he feels he’s the only one who should provide for himself. basically, he doesn’t accept “charity” from other people, and he thinks most people shouldn’t accept “charity” from others, either. very much a “pull yourself up by the bootstraps” kind of guy, which i consider toxic as fuck, so, like. :)

anastasia - she’s a lot like vlad; she feels her judgment is the best in most situations, and she feels she deserves to be in charge at all opportunities because of this. her confidence teeters on pride, and she often confuses the two and unknowingly comes across as arrogant and abrasive because of this. she trusts the abilities of others, it’s just that she believes she works the hardest and wants it the most, and this innate desire puts her above others. she’s also prone to fits of jealousy, especially over her friends, an attribute also lovingly instilled into her by her father :p if you so much as look at her best friends the wrong way, she will come for your throat as though she were some rabid dog, about to feast on her next meal. she’s loyal, yes, but loyalty doesn’t come without its faults; she’s quick to excuse her friends, even for truly heinous actions they provably committed, so long as she feels the intention is forgivable. her love and affection for other people blinds her, and often she’ll act in their best interest, even if that means being rude or aggressive towards others who go against them.

ilya - his toxic trait is that he’s never featured on this blog and idk what to do with him <3 his other toxic trait is that when hes a teen hes gonna commit arson. thats sooooo toxic

ok im gonna go through everyone else really quickly bc my fingers hurt HAHAHA ok lets speedrun this!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

bonnie - her toxic trait is that she thinks 50 shades of gray is legitimately a good book series. LMAOOOOOOOOOOOO

cooper - his toxic trait is that he smells so bad and he doesnt know why he uses soap and deodorant and bathes frequently hes just sweaty asf and you know what Me too king sweaty kings rise up

shivi - her toxic trait is that shes a barista at a coffee shop and she doesnt even like coffee. her other toxic trait is that she lowkey hates vampires :( and thats just rude asf

maeve - her toxic trait is that shes an apologist. she sees someone doing something terrible and shes like OKAY THEY DID THIS BAD THING BUT THEY’RE JUST TROUBLED IT’S NOT THEIR FAULT MAYBE I CAN FIX THEM!!!! like no bitch you cant

tarek - his toxic trait is NOTHING tarek is literally so perfect like he just wants to take care of his sick boyfriend and learn how to be a top tier witch like thats it? He doesnt deserve any slander bye

abigail - her toxic trait is that she’s SOOOOOO clingy to the point where like u guys can be in the same room but if you’re not looking at her rn while you two are in the same room together she’s like DO YOU HATE ME? like abbie please we dont hate u ur just being crazy rn. shes also extremely jealous and self-destructive so like if she feels like u are cheating on her she will FREAK OUT and ruin your relationship bc she doesn’t know how to effectively communicate her emotions and feels the need to lash out inexplicably at everything that triggers her </3 poor girl

karmen - her toxic trait is that she hides behind her humor and nonchalant persona to mask her emotions. she says it’s a coping mechanism, but the truth is, she refuses to meaningfully engage with these feelings, as they’re too uncomfortable for her, so she downplays her struggles with humor. she’s very much someone who acts as though she’s got it under control, even if the truth is, she’s struggling to stay afloat. her other toxic trait is that she will endanger her own internet safety it if means she can get a cute e-milf to send her money <3

caspian - he’s reserved to a fault, as though he’s physically unable to admit what’s troubling him. yet, when he speaks, you can always tell when there’s an issue. it’s always one of those things with him, where the emotion is too repressed to be articulated, yet too present to ignore. he’s so resistant to aid, he’d rather subject himself to terrible situations if it means denying help from another. often, he does this under the guise that he doesn’t wish to be a burden to others, therefore he must take care of himself without help, but he fails to realize that by not helping himself, he’s hurting his relationships around him, which burdens everyone. he’s deeply insecure, and he often weaponizes his insecurities, typically without meaning to. this manifests in a lot of self-deprecation, deflective language during arguments, ie “I’m the worst person ever, I wouldn’t blame you if you hated me after this,” which often comes off very manipulative. again, he doesn’t mean to sound manipulative, it’s just something that happens naturally, something he's gotta work towards alleviating.

vaughn - like caspian, he’s many emotions which are too strong to ignore, though too repressed to be expressed. this manifests primarily through vaughn’s financial immaturity and his promiscuity. he enjoys the physical pleasures of life, and he often abuses these luxuries as a way to distract himself from the very real pain he feels, pain he refuses to admit he harbors. so instead he sings his silly songs and spends his money recklessly and fucks everyone within a thirty mile radius to distract himself from the void in his chest :\

wolfgang - he’s basically an incel LMAOOOOOOO or like what do they call an incel who larps as a normal person to pick up woman? a pick up artist i think? hes that LMAO hes quite literally in the incel community is what im trying to say. i havent talked about it yet but its literally a plot point. if you look in my brainstorm sheet rn it says “Wolfgang munch reads incelme forums every day. Wolfgang munch thinks j*rdan peters*n is the leading figurehead in the hall of intelligentsia.” so like yeah

[lsdruid]

“Anyone else feeling homicidal right now?”

[1] Love for Maximus The real psychopaths of history, upon learning that killing is frowned upon in most cultures, take up research and author textbooks. These demonic cysts of the world never die. Across generations, they appear in the lives of young Gilneans, their spirits wild and lustful like young wolves, and then fuck them over until the young wolves roll over and expose their vulnerable undersides to their now dominant lover. Boredom, apathy, and homicidal thoughts are the half-demon love children. It was the words comprehensible to only an educated fraction of all Gilneans, swimming in blue ink across a fragile page, that were the only remnant of a dignified life long gone. Through the ink, a disembodied voice endured. Somebody made love under sheets, slid coins across the counters of sweet shops, sobbed over graves, and slipped into death beneath the gazes of loved ones. Who’s dying now? The only souls currently thinking of his name, a pair ofstudents. For the rest of their lives, the name “Albert Hendrick” will flush their faces with a furrowed brow and taut lips, as if remembering a spurned lover, or closer to the truth, hours choking their own minds with formulas. “Y'know, some people internalize, wanna kill themselves.” a slender, pale hand flattened a lock of reddish hair against a soft cotton nightgown, directly over the heart thudding beneath milky, speckled skin. A willowy index finger jutted into the spine of the open textbook. “This makes me wanna kill -somebody else-.” A boy with neglected blond curls and savage blue eyes lied down alongside, obliviously peering into the book, his eyes soft and curious where his amber-eyed companion’s were simmering with frustration. He was six feet, very tall for a Gilnean of fifteen. His looks have been compared to a number of celebrities. “You’re almost all the way through.” The boy reported matter-of-factly, deftly snatching his friend’s calculation-smeared paper from underneath a cocked elbow. “Hey, how are y'doing these problems without making the table?” “I uh, have no idea. He doesn’t check for accuracy, I’m bullshitting so I can get this over with and get credit,” the girl explained, suddenly flustered. “Ha, I thought you knew some super genius shortcut to these ‘n I was wasting my time here, Miss four point somethin’” “Just finish that up so we can get going.” “Might as well do some learning while I’m filling this sheet out, rather than write down nonsense.” “When are you ever gonna need to know the scientific name of the knee cap? Like, oh fuck, oh shit, help, I got shot in the patella.” “I used to be an adventurer like you, then I took an arrow to the patella.” “You are finishing that today, and we are -leaving in ten minutes-,“The girl snapped, her last words spoken with the restrained fervor of a judge sentencing a man to die. “Patience of a saint.” He patted the girl’s back. The girl jabbed her elbow into his ribs. A nerve has been touched, and the boy, no gambler, wouldn’t test his luck again. The subtle, sarcastic comment was applicable. Anxiety and impatience haunted the girl like a lingering disease. Nothing was ever accomplished quickly enough, nothing was ever quite right. She lived in the past, she clawed at the corners of her mind as if with enough mutilation, their guts would spill and yield answers from the future. It is believed that whoever created life would be disappointed; the gift of youth, meant to be enjoyed, was wasted fretting. Then again, these believers should be reminded that urchins in the streets are starving. What does another irritated soul matter to this maker of things, or to anyone? “For fuck’s sake, you’re gonna get going, or you’re gonna get two shattered patellas.” “Well, shit, I’ve only got so many of those!” It took several minutes to slip into cotton shirts and heavy woolen garments. Breakfast took another five – honey and bread was jammed into mouths and scarfed down, the plain crumbs chokingly thick, dry, and hesitant to go down a throat at this bleary hour of the morning. Out the door in thirty seconds, enough time to walk several miles of winding Gilnean streets with time to spare. The sun had yet to breach the layers of cumulus that hung languidly over the city. A vicious cold lurked in the fog, its moisture chilling the air to a deep freeze. With tops of buildings drenched in fog, the sky appeared oppressively low. If it weren’t for the lamps that distributed vital light along the cobblestone streets, wet and slippery with morning dew, school children would never be able to trek to their livelihoods at the proper time of seven in the morning. The conversation was as sparse and bland as breakfast, but it was basked in the unassuming warmth of old friendship. The cold wasn’t bad enough to bite through their layers and worry their skin, and the morning was pleasant aside from the weather. the streets were mostly empty, save for the occasional stranger, who always seemed to be as bundled up, sleepy and shy as they were. The boy occasionally initiated cheerful good mornings, but was never returned anything aside from mumbled greetings. After one of these failed social gestures, the girl scuffed puddle water at her buddy, who pretended to be unaware of her antics. Bored, she skipped to his side. “I just remembered, I wanted to get to school a -bit- early to speak with a teacher, and we’re running a -bit- behind,” the boy pointed out, his tone optimistically rising in pitch. She dug into him with a pointed amber glare as her perfect morning schedule melted in her hands. “You -forgot-.” The possible words left unsaid, yet hinted by her threatening look, is what unnerved him the most. “We’re good, hey, we should be able to cut through here.” When the pair turned into a musty alley, they were hardly able to walk side by side. The girl could have sworn the buildings were trying to squeeze them like bugs. It was hard to navigate, but the boy possessed an amazing sense of spatial awareness. His knack for navigation never failed him, although in this situation, after winding through a few forks in a narrow labyrinthian alley of an overcrowded city, it looked like it might be a while before they got an idea of their whereabouts. Once they were thoroughly lost, the darkness unraveled something large and fanged on four legs. It was just a dog. The girl moved behind the boy, grabbed his gloved hand, and gently tugged. Frothy drool oozed from the bitch’s jowls and shiny drops of saliva coalesced on the ground, glinting like little coins in the teasing light. She moved forward, but it wasn’t quite right, the gait was interrupted every moment with a limp. She dragged herself over the dark, wet cobblestones like a demon from hell. She opened up a mouth full of horrendous teeth and strings of spit. The boy looked inside and froze. His repose was shattered by a jarring cry that sounded like a woman’s shriek combined with a slamming door. The adrenaline iced his blood, then set it on fire. When his senses cleared, he realized he had stood bleary eyed while his companion swung her fifteen pound book bag into the beast’s twisted, fanged grimace. It was still standing after the blow, staring at them, froth and vapor both streaming from its maw. The vapor floated up in delicate spirals and the saliva, thick as porridge, laboriously tumbled onto the cobbles. In an attempt to startle the rabid animal, the boy raised both arms and waved vigorously. The beast gazed at him, perplexed. Then, it slid to the ground on its side. The mangy, wiry form was suddenly overtaken by erratic tremors. “Oh, damn. Just keep walking,” the boy hissed to his gaping companion, wrapping an arm around her shoulders, gently coaxing her to abandon the scene, to stroll around the rabid dog without looking. It was nearly over. They were some ten feet away when the girl braced her legs, bringing the two bodies moving as one to a halt. “Wait! I hear something.” He could hear it now. The silence in the motionless alley managed to sustain a whimpering so quiet he had to listen for a moment to assure himself he was not mistaken. The girl drifted from her companion’s side, slowly moving towards a pile of rubbish blurred by the hazy darkness. She had traced the sound to its source. She knelt and the boy took several wary steps towards her. A soaked and unpleasantly grimy cloth sheltered an equally grimily unpleasant puppy. He had the coloration of a cow, white with large ink stains of black. The fur was congealed to the bony little body with a foul-smelling soup. The boy raced over, peeling the outermost coat from his shoulders and arms as he went. He plucked the mud puppy from the dirty hands of his companion and swaddled the little beast in wool, holding the bundle close to his chest. The pup looked up at him with large, milky brown eyes. They both giggled, first the boy in low, coughing spurts, and then the girl with breathy chuckles. The shock of the attack melted to overwhelming adoration of a baby animal. It looked to them both, and then began to cry out indignantly for care, its little form shaking like a leaf. Upon request, dog and jacket were shoved into the straight-faced boy’s shirt. The little head popped out. “Are you naming him? You found him.” “I’ll give -you- the honor,” the girl huffed out in between giggles. “Then he is Maximus. Maximus, Conqueror of Words! Hero of our time.” “He doesn’t look like a Maximus.” “He’ll grow into it. Look at those big paws!“

The puppy arched its neck and squirmed around until he was able to press noses with the boy. A little pink tongue darted out, the cleanest bit of flesh they’d ever seen from this little animal, to wash the boys chin and lips. “That’s disgusting. You could start drooling and snarling at me like the mum. Stop what you’re doing.” “Wise advice from a wise girl.” “Yeah, well, obviously it’s because Im ‘Miss Four Point Something’ and you’re slackin’ at three point three three three threethreethreethreethreethreethteethreethreeththththththth-” He had a breathtaking moment of fear in which he morbidly imagined her never being able to stop, so he covered her lips with his own. The moment it dawned on her that she’s practically being spooned dog saliva, she shoves the guffawing boy away. The puppy yowled, and she yowled right back. "Y'talking politics to ‘em, Jay?” "I think he’s a Godfrey supporter.” “Oh, dear god.”