#Im going to be incredibly busy next week as well

[endlesspaint]

Oof I finally have a few hours for myself---

Anyways! References! Here are the reference sheets for my AU "Beyond Reach" it's messy but it gets the job done :3

I have a few illustrations planned for this au, so stay tuned hehehe

[arlertwhore]

pairing: paige bueckers x fem! reader

synopsis: you try to breakup with paige, but she apologizes the right way.

warning (s): smut, strap, nasty makeout sesh, desperate p (on my knees for her yo), body licking, nipple sucking, ab riding, strap riding, overstim, hairpulling. think it’s all.

word count: like 4k or sum?

author note: GUYSSS SEND ME REQQ im runnin outta ideas but they’re helping fr — omgosh i was kinda lazy w this one but 🤷‍♀️ we’re done soo enjoy!! Unedited again, based off req again, and written very late (again)

For a while now, Paige had sensed things were starting to change between you guys, but she never realized the full extent of it until you were laid out before her, prepared for her to claim what she'd rightfully believed belonged to her and just her.

In that moment and the moments that followed, she'd become immensely startled at how susceptible she'd become to the clear break from casuality your actions unintentionally endorsed. You most likely hadn't seen it that way -- you'd always harbored a tiny figurative crush on Paige from the beginning which you had confided in her friends about.

Paige was also well aware, notioned by your behavior during sex. You consistently praised her for being 'so fucking hot' and would go on fuck-drunk-tangets about how attractive you found her, or you'd occasionally steal a kiss from her whenever her lips were momentarily unoccupied during your hookups. She found your excitement endearing and trusted your ability to turn it off outside of the bedroom, which you always did. But for the first time ever, truly ever since you guys had fucked, which was countless times now, you had let your emotions overcome you, and you had kissed Paige in a way that was incredibly intimate, meant for real lovers.

Due to her occasional tiredness that sometimes prohibited the girl from leaving, she had spent the night, and the morning after, when you had both woke up interwined, naked with your bodies against each-other, you gave her a telling gaze before foolishly pressing your perfect lips against hers in a way that didn't require a genius in strictly physical relationships to realize that wasn't the moment for a kiss.

One thing about Paige, though, was that she couldn't ever resist you. She hated knowing so and wanted to fix it. In the same way you had a silly crush on her, she always held a small amount of an irrestible infatuation with you. If she didn't want to do something, Paige always managed to stop herself, but with you, she could never regain control or resist certain instances at particular times.

As most casual partners did, you two never kissed without it leading somewhere, and you were both aware of the limited time you guys had.

Yet, you spent a significant portion of that dwindling time passionately making out in bed like lovers, not pausing for a single moment to even catch your breath. It was undeniably intimate, passionate, and emotional, yet to Paige, it felt like another mistake, this time on your end. She knew you were very smart but chose to give you the benefit of the doubt. Due to her budding feelings, she chose to believe it could've just been her misreading the signs of the kiss and it could've been normal, just you being overly excited on accident, which happened to the best of us.

It could've even been you savoring your last moments with her before life resumed again.

You had been busy working and going to group study dates with your friends while Paige and her team traveled a city over to train at a renowned studio before their big game on the weekend, meaning she'd be gone until the next Tuesday, a week from your morning together.

It had been Thursday, a good ways through the week until Paige returned and until you had your off day booked, but you guys had not texted or called despite both thinking of each-other lots. All your friends, who previously didn't care about Paige, believing her to be nothing but a douchey-player-skeeze, finally cared enough to listen to your loss of virginity story. Every detail, from the precise strokes she gave you to her entranced demeanor at the state she'd left you in and the morning after story made them recognize the intensity and intimacy in the situation.

Some of them believed that Paige was breaking from her usual behavior, what they called her many 'laws', because she was starting to seriously like you, but the others thought it had been the opposite way around. They said she had gotten what she wanted from you and was done, seeing no point in caring about her rules at the end of the road. From the beginning of your involvement with her, they warned you that it was a trap designed to make you develop feelings before she eventually lived up to her player reputation and broke the heart of an innocent, never-before-loved girl. This topic sparked a heated debate among your friends, who relished the opportunity for debate. As they argued about whether Paige had fallen in or out of love, a grave realization hit you like a ton of bricks.

Before Paige settled down with you only, a choice she made on the basis of you being the only girl she was seeing who wasn't stress, drama, or complications, she was always transparent about her weekends after big games. If she had chosen to stay where the game was hosted for the weekend instead of coming back home to relax after a busy week, it meant she was getting with other girls. ou weren't by any means dumb. Paige was going to leave you; not for any of the debated reasons, but because she had likely realized the intimacy long before you had and was now prepared to escape. The kiss you initiated was spontaneous, and Paige likely knew this, choosing to begin a subtle breakaway. She'd start by making it clear she would be with other girls, not calling or texting, thus ghosting you, hoping your smart self would catch the hint.

And boy, you had. You broke down. On the kitchen floor, all your moments with Paige, starting from the beginning, replayed in your head in a loop. You remembered when you first met at the party, the way she looked at you, and how it felt when she kissed you. Then, there was the first time you two had sex. You recalled how nervous you were, and how she reassured you, alike the presumed, figurative and literal last time you had. You reflected on the first time you ever cried in front of her, upset at your grades and the first time she opened up to you about her struggles with wanting a normal life while also being committed to her career. It was a rare glimpse into her world, and it brought you closer together.

As these memories flooded your mind, you couldn't help but feel a deep sense of longing and sadness for what was now lost.

Life had become unbearably stressful, and you found solace in Paige's company, perhaps subconsciously evading your stress by seeking her out. She was more than just a girl you were fucking ; she was a friend, someone you could turn to when you had no one else. But now, the prospect of experiencing her comfort again seemed uncertain, and you couldn't shake the feeling that it was all your fault for initiating this foolish ordeal in the first place. You were upset, feeling betrayed by Paige's sudden detachment. How could she just let you go like that? You felt dumb for ever believing she wasn't capable of it, despite her warnings. The exhaustion from juggling school, work, and studies had reached its tipping point, and you were overwhelmed by it all. Your thoughts swirled endlessly in a sea of self-doubt and despair. "My friends were right," you lamented. "How could I agree to getting used by her?" you cried out. Thoughts of your own perceived foolishness echoed in your mind. "I'm so dumb," you whispered to yourself, feeling like you had single-handedly ruined everything.

And in a fit of utter madness, you decided to text her, asking: ur stayin over the wknd? lmao i just realized that wtf? When an hour passed, her typical response span, you lashed out and texted: who are u fucking paige? All boldly. You never questioned it -- that was a rule. But who cared about breaking her rules at this point? You following them for this long had got you nothing but dumped and ignored like a piece of trash.

To your expentancy, Paige never replied and you texted her a long paragraph detailing your frustration with her. As you reached the end of your message, a sense of clarity washed over you. In a futile last attempt to take control of the situation, regardless of who said it first, with a heavy heart, you made the difficult decision to end things, recognizing that prolonging the pain was no longer an option.

Then, you got up, got dressed, and went to the gym. There, you released all your pent-up energy and had a chance to focus on yourself. Needless to say, you slept soundly after letting your emotions out, feeling a weight lifted off your shoulders at chosing to prioritize your own well-being.

Paige's morning (and night) was a stark contrast to yours. While you wept, she was getting with a UCONN cheerleader after hours and drunk out of her fucking mind. She woke up at the side of a random girl while expriencing the worst hangover she had ever had, unable to recall the events of the previous night.

She stumbled from an Uber to her dorm house, feeling disoriented and sick. Upon returning home, Azzi noticed her state and confiscated her phone to retrace her night, only to discover a barrage of texts from you. Paige spent the next two days sleeping off her hangover, feeling utterly drained. On Sunday, when the rest of the team returned home, they staged an intervention for Paige.

They expressed concern about her drinking habits and advised her to focus on her career rather than letting a girl consume her thoughts. They warned her against reconciling with you, citing your recent breakup and her drinking as red flags. Paige felt confused and defensive as her team confronted her about the relationship. She argued that there was nothing wrong with it and denied being as invested as they claimed. However, when they pointed out evidence of her attachment to you, including her lock-screen, her taking your virginity, and the videos of you she frequently watched without caring for being caught, she felt defeated. It was at that moment, when her world seemed to be pushing you two apart, that Paige discovered you had initiated the push yourself. She felt the same heartache and confusion you had felt the day before. Despite trying to maintain a facade of indifference, she couldn't deny the impact the situation was having on her. Despite her efforts to focus on training, playing, and studying, thoughts of you consumed her late at night, leaving her feeling torn and emotionally drained.

She knew it was probably wrong to do so, but once again, she gave you the benefit of the doubt. Perhaps you were going through stuff or maybe it was just a momentary lapse in judgmental. There was no way you truly meant to end things and this rebellion was very uncharacteristic of you. Paige felt the need to see you face-to-face, to observe your behavior and gauge if you were truly done with her, and if she was truly done with you as her friends suggested she should be. Plus, she had always emphasized the importance of speaking in person, so you should have known to expect her at your door on Tuesday night.

Coincidentally, you had just ordered dinner, so when you heard the knock, you pulled open the door without hesitation and froze dead in your tracks at the sight of her.

"Hey," she half-smiled, awkwardly. This was bad. What the hell was she doing here? Deep down, you knew you were still tangled up inthe aftermath of your decision, but that didn't stop the instinctual yearning that surged within you at the sight of her. You hadn't even expected her to show up, stirring a potent mix of confusion and desire that pulsed through your veins and heart like a wildfire. As you stood there between your door-frame, silent, your body betraying you with insistent tingles and heated pulses to your clit, she continued. "I know I should've called or texted you back before showing up, but I've been in some shit," Paige confessed, her voice tinged with regret. "I just wanna talk." "You're right, Paige. You should've texted me back or called me. Your entire week away, why didn't you?" you pressed, voice sharp with frustration. A silence hung heavy in the air briefly before the girl scratched the nape of her neck, her demeanor embarrased. "I

was hungover," she admitted sheepishly. You nodded, your tongue poking at your cheek as you mulled over her response. "Alright, well, it's not my fault then, Paige. Goodnight," you stated firmly, intending to close the door. However, with her strength, she held it open as she insisted, "Don't be a bitch, y/n. You aren't this kinda girl." Against your will, the door was opened fully. "No, Paige, you don't get to ignore me and then show up to fix things when you realize I'm not just some toy at your convience and that I can make choices in our situation too. Up until now, I've respected everything you've ever told me, so just this once, respect what I said to you," you asserted firmly.

Paige could have engaged in a heated debate with you, confident in her ability to outmaneuver your frustrations, but that wasn't her intention being there. She wasn't ready to lose you yet. "You're that mad at me? You wanna end everything?" she asked softly, her voice laced with a hint of vulnerability as she searched your eyes for an answer. You remained silent, averting your gaze from hers, which alone had spoken volumes. She sighed out, remorseful. "I'm sorry." This was a far cry from the Paige you'd begun with. At the start of it all, when she held all the power and you were simply the girl, she would have never uttered a straightforward apology. If she flaked on you and showed up later, she didn't apologize outright. Instead, she tended to offer explanations for her actions. Presently, she had not even attempted her typical evasive manuvers. "I'm an asshole." she conceded self-deprecatively. And oddly enough, with her hands clasped behind her back, chewing out her bottom lip, and a look of remorse on her face, she just looked so sexy to you.

Your face had lit up after she'd insulted herself, like it had pleased you, and when Paige saw your change in demeanor, she instantly recognized a positive response from you to anything she'd said, so she spoke again, her tone now more fervent and eager for your acknowledgment. "I am, right?" she implored, her voice tinged with desperation, as if searching for validation from you. When you tried to look up, avoiding her eyes, it was her touch next. You craved it. You'd missed it. You wanted it. Yeah, you wanted to be strong too—but with her hand interlocking with yours, you really wanted it. She did too. You could feel her eyes tracing down your body, and in that moment, you knew Paige missed you too, even if she was acting a fool in absence. She could have any girl in the world, but here she was, becoming undone, unraveled, so desperate just for you. You nodded your head carefully, confirming your agreement with that sentiment. She was an asshole. "Yeah," she murmmured, her desire for your approval palpable. You couldn't even bring yourself to look at her as her head buried itself delicately in the crook of your neck—it would make it all too real. At first, she's still, engulfing your scent with deep inhales like a curious dog. As she inhales, the air sends shivers down your spine, making your skin tingle with anticipation. Every nerve in your body feels alive, sensitive to her every touch. That's what causes you to let out a soft moan when with a desperate hunger, Paige's tongue glides over your skin, tracing every curve of your crook with an urgency that betrays her need for you and leaves you breathless. She keeps going, entirely undeterred by your half-hearted whisper of, "Paige, stop." as your hand rests on her waist, holding her close. It's as if something has come over her. She acts like she's starved and can't get enough of you. Like she's trying to imprint every inch of you into her memory before you slip away. "Don't leave me," Paige's voice trembles with longing as her hand snakes down to grip your ass tightly. "Please."

You're losing yourself too, succumbing to the intoxicating heat of the moment. Other building occupants could stumble upon the scene unfolding, but in that moment, you don't care about nothing other than her. As the intensity of the moment washes over you, your head, previously tilted backward, comes down instinctively.

You shut your eyes tightly, feeling the warmth of Paige's lips against yours as you press into the kiss. Her tongue darts against yours and with an insatiable hunger, she begins to prod at your tongue, licking that too. You can taste the faint trace of yourself on her tongue, heightening the intensity of the moment as you both vie for control in the kiss. You begin to grind against each other, your bodies moving in a frantic rhythm that mirrors the urgency of your kisses, and your lips struggle to keep pace with the fevered tempo as you move against each-other, Paige groaning loudly, unable to contain the surge of arousal exiting her pussy. With each further movement, spit begins to fall on your chest, a tangible sign of the passion consuming you both.

In the blink of an eye, Paige has slipped into your apartment. She places you against the front door and her lips trail across your chest as she swiftly undresses you. You find yourself yielding to her advances. She exudes a strength that renders resistance futile.

As your clothes fall away, Paige doesn't linger to admire the sight before her. She mentally accounts how she couldn't ever take the sight of your body, in real life and not over a phone, for granted, but she's too worked up to say anything to you at this point.

As she lays you down on the bed, she wastes no time in shedding her shirt, revealing the contours of her body clad in a sleek sports bra. The definition of her abs catches your eye, a testament to her week of rigorous training. A small moan escapes your lips at the sight, fueling the desire that courses through your veins. Instead of passively accepting her advances, you decide to take control. Rising up on your knees, you grasp the strings of her sweatpants and pull her towards you, eyes locked with her blueys. "I wanna ride 'em, P," you declare, seizing her by the waist and guiding her onto the bed. She's momentarily lost for words, her eyes widening in bewilderment. "W-what?" with a soft chuckle, you help her prop herself up against the bedpost before straddling her waist. Leaning forward, you dangle your breasts enticingly in front of her face.

"You're so strong," you murmur, releasing a loud moan as you rock your hips forward. She flexed in response, mirroring your movements, whether intentional or not, and you felt a rush of heat flood your body. Her solid, sturdy body was perfect for the grind of your clit. "I just wish you were as smart as you are powerful."

Paige held onto your hips as you ground forward, the slickness between your bodies creating a smooth, frictionless glide. With a husky tone, she murmured, "All wet for me, huh, ma?"

"Who wouldn't be?" you whimpered in response, your hips bucking eagerly against her. As you increased your pace, Paige delivered a sharp slap to your ass, exactly how she knew you liked it, eliciting a sharp cry from your lips. "You still like me," she stated the obvious truth as you shuddered uncontrollably beneath her touch. Her mouth latched onto your nipple as you continued grinding, the feel of her lips and tongue making your hips stutter. "Mmph, fuck, P, wait... I'll cum if you..." you paused, halting your movements to catch your breath as she continued to suckle at your chest. With a loud 'pop', she unlatched, her own chest heaving with desire. "Can I fuck you with it again?" she asked, her voice thick with need and longing, her eyes searching yours for consent to do what began all this in the first place. "In the drawer," you replied mundanely, trying to hide your excitement though your desire for her was raging. You reasoned that the more unamused you behaved, the more she would try to make it up to you, all calculated to draw her closer while maintaining a semblance of control.

As she dug through your drawer and began to fit it on upon the bed, you stood up, positioning your vanity mirror to face the bed.

You needed to see yourself for what you were about to do. Climbing onto the bed, you slithered up Paige's body slyly, pointing your finger toward the mirror, your reflections capturing the desire and anticipation in both of your eyes. "Kay," you huffed, elevating your hips and watching as you slowly sunk down on her. She held your hips to help you, but you pushed them off, frowning fauxly.

"What, Paige? Don't think I got it in me to fuck you?" you teased, elevating slowly before coming back down again. With her hands behind her head, arms involuntarily flexing, she shook her head. "Never. Not how I fuck you." You ticked your head. "Let's see then. Shut up and let me focus." As you picked up the pace, you closed

your eyes, lost in the sensations coursing through your body. It was a familiar feeling, one you had forgotten but now remembered all too well. Paige's heavy breaths, entertained, echoed in the room, a testament to the intesity of the moment. You struggled to find a steady rhythm, letting instinct guide your movements. "Baby, slow it d--" Her voice, calling you "baby," sent a jolt of pleasure through you. "Mmh," you squeaked listlessly, "Fuck, Paige, keep talking to me," you moaned, bouncing on the thick member, your head thrown back in abandon. "What's the magic word?" she teased, her words sending shivers down your spine. "Pl-please," you stammered, your body on fire. "Good girl, baby. You know I love when you use your manners," she cooed, her words driving you over the edge. Unable to resist any longer, you surrendered to Paige's devotion, allowing her to guide you toward the peak of ecstasy, despite the initial intention of taking control.

She remembered how much you enjoyed it on your stomach. With precision, she slammed her hips against yours, pounding you relentlessly for around ten seconds before deciding to switch your position, sensing that you were close. With you now on your stomach, she placed a hand on your hip and pressed you down against the bed as she continued to pound into you with fervor. Gripping your hair, she pulled you up so you could see yourself in the mirror, intoxicated by the sight. You looked utterly wrecked. Drool escaped your parted lips, your hair matted with sweat, and tears streaked down your flushed cheeks. She had fucked you so relentlessly that it bordered on painful, yet the pleasure was incomparable. The sight of her biting her bottom lip as she worked you over, plunging deep inside you without breaking a sweat, was mesmerizing. "I'm sorry, baby," she whispered, leaning forward and pressing her body against yours as she continued to piston her hips, driving deep into you. "I'm so, so sorry. I hope you forgive me. I won't stop until you do."

Paige's powerful strokes sent loads of pleasure coursing through your bones, each thrust causing you to shake. You gripped the sheets tightly for stability, your nails digging into the fabric as she plunged into you with a hunger that matched your own. With your legs wrapped around her, you met her gaze, drowning in the intensity of her eyes as she devoured you with hers.

The sight of her arm muscles flexing as she held you steady, abs too, and her body working against yours fueled the fire burning within you, and it was only a matter of time until you exploded entirely. The reflection in the mirror only added to the raw eroticism of the moment, capturing the sheer intensity of your connection, the passion that consumed you both. She had you completely at her mercy, using you for her own pleasure, and yet, you couldn't help but revel in the sheer ecstasy of it all. "I wanna cum, Paige," you whimpered, your voice thick with need. "Please, just keep fucking me like that." The sound of skin meeting skin echoed in the room, a song of want mingling with the rhythm of your moans. You surrendered to the pleasure, letting it wash over you in wave after wave of bliss, each one pushing you closer to the edge of oblivion. "Do you forgive me yet?" she breathed, her voice dripping with cockiness. You shook your head, the ache of desire mingling with the sting of resentment. "Why not, baby?" she teased, her lips curling into a wicked grin. The truth spilled from your lips, a confession. "Because you're so fuckin' mean to me," you gasped, the words punctuated by a moan as she drove into you with renewed fervor. She shook her head, a smirk playing at her lips as she reveled in the power she held over you. "If I was mean to you, would I be fucking you to tears?" she taunted, each word pushing you closer to the brink of surrender. Please, Paige, faster, m'gonna cum so hard," you gasped, your nails digging into her wrists as you begged for more. "Yeah, baby?" she purred, disregarding the marks on her skin as she complied with your request, increasing the tempo with each thrust. "Fuck, P, yeah," you moaned, "shit mommy, I'm gonna cum." But she slowed herself slightly, denying you release. "No, you're not," she asserted, her thumb wiping away your tears as she held your gaze. "Not until you ask mommy to."

"Ughhh, P, so mean," you whined, complying, "please, mommy, please let me cum on your cock."

She smiled, proud. "C'mon baby, give it to me, mama," she urged, her movements becoming more frantic with each word. "Give it to me," she repeated, "give it to me," and when you finally did, your entire body convulsed, pleasure washing over you as you released, your essence squirting out and staining the sheets. You moaned loudly, the sound echoing in the room, uncaring if your neighbors could hear, lost in the throes of ecstasy. But she didn't stop, continuing to fuck you even after you'd climaxed. And when you finally begged her to stop, overwhelmed and spent, she paid you no mind, only focused on one thing and one thing only. "You forgive me, baby?" she asked, her thrusts sloppy. "Yes, yes, yes, Paige. I forgive you," you murmured, unable to raise your voice any longer."Huh?" she teased, forcing you to speak louder. "Yes, Paige. I FORGIVE YOU!" you declared, the words ringing out as she abruptly withdrew from you. You knew what she wanted next as she removed the strap, her intentions clear. "Let's put your mouth to use," she commanded, and the night was far from over.

an: y/n delulu era? Idk how I rly feel ab this one lmk guys I love reading your comments and my inbox it’s like the best 🤞

click here for masterlist

[talaok]

Hiii, I saw you are accepting requests so I have one. Joel and the reader are married and one day they have a stupid fight but she gets really mad. Joel doesn't want to apologize and she decided to make a sex string. She starts to tease him. She starts to change clothes in front of him, she starts to use nice lingeries and put lotion on her body before go to sleep. One day Joel gives up and says sorry and then they have sex.

Sorry for writing a long request . Thank you 😊

Pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader

Warnings: sexual tension and allusion to smut

a/n: Whoever you are anon, I owe you a HUGE apology. I am terribly sorry for the wait, really, i don't know what happened, im sorry

You weren't someone who took things personally, nor did you deem yourself touchy, but everything has its limit.

He had called you a neat freak. I repeat, a neat freak

You, his wife, who he was supposed to love and support 'till death did you part.

He had called you a neat freak just because you had(rightfully) gotten mad at him when (for the millionth time) he had left his clothes all over the bedroom floor. 

And you had (again, rightfully) gotten mad, but he (for some godforsaken reason) didn't even want to think of the possibility of apologizing.

So you had done the most reasonable thing,

You started to make him pay

Now Joel Miller was a strong man, he remained unfazed by whatever life threw at him, he was not a man who was easy to put in a difficult position, but most importantly, he was not a man who liked to surrender.

But to every strength, there's a weakness, and Joel Miller's only weakness, together with his daughter... was you

Or more accurately,

The fact that he couldn't resist, you

So when you started changing in front of him, when, at the end of the day, you stripped slowly right in front of where he was lying on the bed... when you stopped wearing shorts to sleep and started only wearing panties and the tiniest tops or one of his shirts... when you put on that sexy little lingerie you had bought as a surprise for his birthday just before bed, biting down a smirk as you watched his jaw fall slack when you propped one of your legs on the bed so you could slowly massage it with lotion...

all those times, you saw his reaction, you saw the way his eyes darkened, the way he palmed his crotch thinking you couldn't see. But even as he approached you, his hands just as sultry as his voice you had pushed him away, because he hadn't done the one thing you wanted to,

and until he was going to admit defeat and do it, he was gonna have to suffer.

But today... today as you applied lotion to your whole body, his hands felt especially good.

"hello there" he murmured from behind you, his lips already on your neck and his hands on your waist.

"If you think something's gonna happen, you're wrong Joel"

"c'mon sweetheart, you've been torturing me all week" he breathed, his hands trying to lower down to your butt before you slapped them away

"I haven't been torturing you" you corrected "You've been torturing yourself." you watched as he frowned, his eyes too busy drinking every inch of you to look into your own "If you want this to be over, you can simply apologize"

And you would have liked to be able to say that you didn't expect what he did next, but the truth was that Joel Miller was incredibly predictable for someone who knew him as well as you did.

And the truth was, that it was a miracle he hadn't caved in the first day, and now he had reached his limit. 

He was so tired, and god but he had missed you

"I'm sorry darlin'" 

You didn't even bother to hide the smug smirk erupting on your face.

"say it like you mean it" you encouraged, placing the bottle of lotion on the nightstand before turning towards him, finding him inches away from your own face.

"I mean it, I'm sorry sweetheart" he promised, his big hazel eyes only helping him out right now "I won't do it again. I apologize"

"I'm not a neat freak?"

"no" he shook his head, one of his hands going to your cheek to stroke it while the other remained on your waist "You're not a neat freak sugar, you're the most amazing wife anyone could have asked for" he murmured, meeting his lips with yours "and you're so hot you drive me crazy"

"mhh, am I now?" you hummed, a mischievous tint in your tone and in your fingers in the way they played on his chest.

"you are" he nodded, slowly pushing you onto the bed, and crawling on top of you 

A soft laugh bubbled inside your chest as you wrapped your ankles around his back "What else am I?" you murmured to his ear, as he busied his mouth with your neck

"You're always right," he said, one of his hands groping your boobs through the fire-red bra "And you're smart... much smarter than me" he groaned when you grinded up on the hard bulge probing from his boxers "ad you- you're-fuck-" his breath caught as your hand seeped underneath his underwear and freed his cock 

"What?" you asked

"You're fucking perfect sweetheart"

"mhh" you hummed happily, biting your lip as you guided him to your entrance "and don't you ever forget it again"

[doobea]

ALWAYS BE MY MAYBE ─ MEGUMI F.

synopsis: upon graduating and landing your first job outside of college, you soon realize that being in your twenties suck. outside of working nine hours everyday, setting time for the gym, and making shitty home cooked meals, you have a new stressor joining your team on monday - your ex.

MILESTONE EVENT || MILESTONE MASTERLIST

contents: gn!reader, second chances, office romance, lots of awkward tension, background satosugu, alcohol consumption, company mixers and gossip thrown around word count: 7045 (im sorry) a/n: thank you so much for requesting this @mymegumi !! this is my first time writing for megumi so i hope he isn't too ooc!! :3 this was def one of my fav ones i've received hehe also shout out to @popponn for beta reading this like a champ because wow this was a MESS and shes helped w a lot ;;

Walking into the office on a Monday morning and seeing your ex first thing is something you wouldn’t wish on your enemy. 

To make matters even slightly worse, the team manager announces that he’s going to be the new software engineer on your team and that his assigned seat is, surprise surprise, next to yours. 

So this is how things are going now. 

Things have changed drastically between you and Megumi, having today being your one-year break up anniversary, and you’re still finding your ground here. And, it goes both ways, you suppose. The initial shock on your face was hard to hide and you could’ve sworn Megumi felt like putting in his two week notice the moment you walked through those doors. But you don’t blame him when he excuses himself to the nearest bathroom and you don’t blame him when he spends a suspicious amount of time in there.

“Does the new guy have IBS or something?” Your manager, Satoru Gojo, plops himself down at the corner of your desk, completely ignoring the fact that his ass is resting on the pile of documents that you’re planning to review. He’s wearing his usual black circular lenses inside despite it being not sunny on this cold, gloomy December morning. Gojo thinks he looks cool with them on, definitely not trying to gain a certain regional manager’s attention. He’s also disregarding the fact that you’re squirming uncomfortably in your seat. 

You cough loudly into your fist and manage to shimmy a packet from Gojo’s ass pile, trying to drown yourself in work and not engage in the conversation, knowing full well that Gojo can’t keep his mouth shut if he finds out about your relationship history.

“Maybe it’s just first day nerves,” you shrug back.

“I’m not paying him to take a shit at work,” Gojo huffs back, hands on hips like a mother hen. “There’s some Pepto Bismol in the first aid kit in the break room, go hand him that.”

You sigh, clicking the pen repeatedly in your hands in hopes that your manager gets the hint that you’re busy, but he just repeats it, emphasizing that ‘hey, no need to create a toxic work environment’ and that ‘everyone here is family’. 

“You can’t grab Nobara to do it?” You grumble out.

“I’m talking to you right now, aren’t I?” he replies back before hopping off your desk. Gojo adjusts his tie and smooths out his hair before sending finger guns in your direction. “Make Megumi feel at home and I’ll give everyone an extra five thousand on top of the initial holiday bonus, yeah?”

If there’s anything that Satoru Gojo is good at, outside of drunk whining about his ex, it’s bribing. You’ve been working at this company for just under a year and the amount of times he would throw money out in order to get others to do his responsibilities might be more than you can count but, in hindsight, it’s not a bad trait to have. He’s a good listener, attentive of other’s needs, and not a micromanager. And, while you desperately want to say no, you have to admit that having an extra five thousand bonus does sound incredibly nice.

“Fine,” you give in and push yourself out of the seat. “But that’s all that I’m doing for the rest of the week. I’ve got other things I have to catch up on before the end of the year.”

It’s not a lie. You’ve got meetings with clients scheduled back to back until the last week before Christmas and most of them are being indecisive about their app designs. Though, that’s the normal life of being a graphic web designer on a regular day.

“Yeah?” Gojo briefly glances over your calendar that you have pinned against the wooden cork board in your cubicle and hums in deep thought — which is usually not a good sign. “Y’know what? Megumi should join in on the meetings too.”

“H-Huh?”

“Why are you giving me that look? You give him the designs, he makes it look pretty, and then we have profit.”

“Yeah but,” you gesture your hands towards Toge’s desk behind you, who’s currently hunched over and deep into whatever line of code he’s attempting to fix for a particular picky client. “I’m already partnered up with Toge, I don’t think Megumi needs—”

Gojo enunciates your name, loud and slow, tilting his glasses down so you can see the intense blue of his eyes. “Can’t you see I’m trying to hook you up, right now?”

Oh god, so this is why he’s being so persistent.

You heave out another sigh and pinch the bridge of your nose in frustration and embarrassment. “Gojo, are you self projecting right now?” You swear he always does this.

“Am not!” Gojo quickly shoots back with crossed arms. “You look like you haven’t gotten laid in a while and I’d figure I play office cupid with you and the new guy!” Then, a small pause followed by a loud Teams’ message notification comes from his phone. You don’t need to guess who sent it judging by Gojo’s exasperated gasp. “Inumaki, please focus on your tasks instead of listening in on people’s conversations!”

Ping!

DESIGN TEAM - SUB GC [Toge Inumaki]: gojo needs to get laid lolol [Maki Zen’in]: say it louder for the ppl in the back

Gojo manages out another grumpy sound, more a whine than anything else; your grin widens and pat him on the shoulder.

“Pepto Bismol, right?” You snort.

“He’s still going to join—” Gojo starts to respond, but then gets cut off by another notification, and gives up. “Ack—whatever! Just make sure you look after him today, alright? Me and Suguru are going to plan for the holiday party for the rest of the day, so no interruptions!” He announces the last part louder than the rest, staring down at everyone else on the office floor. Gojo is met with a couple of weak ‘yeah, sure, have fun, bud’ before turning his attention back to you. He says the next part in a hush whisper, “Gonna increase it to ten thousand, you spend too much time at work anyway.”

You roll your eyes, nodding away just to agree and end the dreaded topic. “Aye, aye, captain.”

Then, Gojo has the audacity to drink some of your morning tea and sighs, content and relaxed as he’ll ever be, before strutting to the otherside of the floor and into Geto’s office. You and the others are pretty sure they have a secret room connected in there. No one’s ever been able to go inside Geto’s office without a special lock pad code. Something about protecting the company’s patented secrets or whatever. Doesn’t help the allegations that only Gojo has access to said special code.

Ping!

You look at your computer and see that Toge had sent you a private message. 

[Toge Inumaki]: u actually gonna flirt w the new guy?

You glare at Toge, who’s now flashing you a knowing smirk underneath the turtleneck that extends over his mouth. You know he’s celebrating inwardly because, yeah, you see that little glimmer in Toge’s eyes that indicates that he does know your dirty little office secret. How do you know this for a fact? Toge always looks up everyone’s personal and employment history.

It’s always the quiet ones who are freaks.

“No way,” you reply, probably with even more indignation than Gojo, if that’s even possible. “Also, keep the info on the down low and I’ll share some of my bonus with you, please?” If you’re going to survive this job, you might as well steal some of your manager’s tactics.

Without any opposition, Toge sends you a thumbs up.

This is going to be an interesting year.

“You’re making it so not obvious,” Maki starts, sarcastically, as she refills her liter sized tumbler by the company’s only fancy coffee machine. It’s also the only functional one on the floor and Geto claims that it’s worth more than your entire yearly salary. What an absurd purchase but everyone abuses the shit out of it, so you guess it’s worth the price. 

You stick out your tongue in disgust as you watch her put five shots of espresso into the container and wonder how the hell is her body still functioning correctly. “You could’ve at least told me that he applied for the job, y’know?”

“And what? How was I supposed to know he was going to be on our team? Were you going to look for a new job just because he got it?” Maki shoots you an unimpressed look and totally catches the way you chew your lips as your fingers twitch at your sides. “Listen, as your friend and his cousin, I’m not really sure all the details that went down but I know that Megumi isn’t out to hurt you — you should know that too.”

“I do know that,” you angrily place down your mug underneath the machine, firmly pressing the cappuccino option on the touch screen. “We just… didn’t really talk after he had to move, like at all.” You frown.

Maki leans against the break room counter and sips her beverage. “Mind running it back to me again?” 

“It’s long, Maki,” you try to deflect, “Trauma dumping first thing in the morning is rather—”

Ping!

[Satoru Gojo]: did ya hand him the anti poop meds yet? 

“Wait, give me a second, gotta reply to…”

Maki laughs. “All good, take your time.”

[You]: not yet, getting coffee [Satoru Gojo]: losing employee of the month status as we speak  [You]: u being deadass rn [Satoru Gojo]: you wished your ass was getting aidhwkakha 

The sudden keyboard smash and offline status change is enough to lose your interest in the conversation. A chill runs down your spine at the immediate imagination of your supervisors getting it on with each other. As a small distraction, your eyes begin shifting focus around the break room before settling on the small first aid kit in the corner. And now you’re reminded again of the side mission that somehow became a main mission in your twenties’ story line. 

Handing your ex bowel medicine was not part of your bingo card. 

“I’ll talk to you later, Maki,” you release a groan when she laughs again. It’s light hearted, you know that for sure, but it still feels humiliating. 

You round the corner down the hallway leading to the restroom with the neon pink bottle in hand, mumbling to yourself ways to avoid talking to Megumi, before crashing dead on into something, or rather someone, hard. 

“Oh, fuck, I’m so sorry—”

“No, it’s my bad, I—”

You regret ever opening your mouth. A heartbeat pause passes before you could gather your thoughts, coherently. You’re pretty sure you have this dumb, gawking, expression plastered over your face because Megumi is doing all that he can to avoid having proper eye contact with you. 

Instead of half expecting him to brush past you, he points at the neon bottle and asks, slowly, with all seriousness, “Is that for you?”

“F-For me?” You look down at the bottle and look up again, feeling warmth in your cheeks from embarrassment and… anger? You hastily shove the bottle into his hands, strongly ignoring the fact that he smells really good for someone who just spent the last half hour in a bathroom. “It’s for you, idiot!” 

For a split second, Megumi looks wildly offended that you would even consider that he needs something like this. You watch as he’s about to give it back to you or, knowing him, throw it away, when suddenly a tuft of pink pokes out from the corner of your eyes.

Yuuji had somehow acquired a ridiculous bright strand of Christmas lights that he’s looped around his neck. He’s got a Santa hat on, also holding an extra pair too, and you want to question where he managed to get the overly festive attire from, and if there’s some sort of weird in-office holiday event that you weren’t invited to. 

“Hey, hey! I was told to bring this over to the new guy!” Yuuji chirps brightly and stops in his tracks when he sees Megumi in front of you. “You must be him!”

“Megumi,” you wince at saying his name finally, pushing aside your previous strained thoughts due to the new company, and run a feverish hand through your hair. “This is Yuuji, he works in our sales department. Yuuji, this is Megumi, he’s part of the design team.” You reply in a sickly-sweet tone. 

“ ‘Sup! How are you?” Yuuji pops the ‘p’ and whistles.

“I’m charmed,” Megumi sighs and stares him down for a moment, before he finally grips the festive hat when Yuuji presents it to him. “Do I have to?”

“Of course!” Yuuji flicks on the switch to his necklace and it nearly blinds your eyes from how bright it was. The festive colors alternate, and there’s a small jingle that plays right after. Talk about a seizure warning. “It’s part of the company’s tradition!”

Megumi breathes through his nose, rolling his eyes. “The company was founded this year.”

“Yeah, starting today, it’s a company tradition,” Yuuji corrects. 

“Starting today, I’ll write up my notice,” he grumbles, only audible to you. 

You have to admit, you appreciate the dry sarcasm. There’s no denying that Megumi looks like he’s a second away from quitting all within the first two hours of his first day. But, as you noted earlier, you don’t blame him. 

“You guys are coming to the end of the year party, right?” Yuuji snaps a quick selfie with the three of you in it, explaining something about posting on the company’s Instagram story reels and gaining clout. Though, you’re pretty sure that only Yuuji was smiling in the photo.

“I was actually planning on staying home,” you answer sheepishly, not wanting to give away the obvious reason.

Yuuji frowns and immediately pulls out his signature puppy dog eyes. “Aww, wait really? You seemed so excited for it earlier last week.”

You’re shaking your head. “No, I wasn’t—”

“Yuh huh,” Yuuji fishes out his phone to pull up the fucking group chat receipts, showing it to both you and a perplexed Megumi. “You said you went out and bought an ugly Christmas sweater the next day!”

“It was a joke!”

Yuuji pulls up a photo of you in said ugly Christmas sweater. You die a little on the inside.

“You’re wearing it right here, though!”

“Yuu—” 

“A joke, huh,” Megumi kicks the bottom of his loafers against the floor, shoving the red hat deep into his pants’ pocket, before excusing himself, again. He holds up the pink bottle and turns around, back towards the restrooms. “Turns out I’ll be needing this, thanks.” There’s a hint of malice oozing from the last word, one that you pick up quite easily while Yuuji looks around confused. 

“So Gojo wasn’t overreacting about the IBS thing…” Yuuji muses.

It’s now midday and a total of less than thirty words have been exchanged so far between you and Megumi. You two have been working in silence for the past hour at the cubicles and you’re beginning to feel awfully guilty about the earlier exchange. 

It wasn’t your intention to make him feel unwelcomed. Maybe you’re thinking too deeply into this than needed?

“Are you feeling okay?” You arch a brow, pulling your eyes away from your monitor for a moment to look at Megumi. Megumi stops typing and makes a small appreciative sound, nodding quickly enough. You know better though, whenever he has a far off look on his face, that his mind’s a mess. 

“Yeah,” Megumi tries to sound casual as he goes back to coding. “This is probably not easy for you either, right?” He lets an ear bud dangle from his side.

“That noticeable?” You let out a short laugh, knowing that you both know each other still pretty fucking well. “It’s just… been a year, you know? Haven’t seen much of you since you moved.” You’re waiting for him to take the bait as you have your suspicions, and you don’t voice them, but you swear, just for a moment, there’s a strange expression on Megumi’s face. Then, you blink, and maybe you’ve imagined it all, because his face goes back to looking as stoic as he always did.

“I’m,” he pauses his fingers, sinking back into his seat, eyes downcasted. “I’m sorry. I know I should’ve called you, at least.”

“I was worried sick like crazy,” you suddenly admit, the words seemingly flowing out at this point. “Was almost debating calling the missing person’s hotline until the mailman, of all people, told me that your family packed up and dipped.”

Megumi isn’t the most expressive person when it comes to apologies, having an already wildly unconventional childhood was enough to shell himself out from everyone else. Though, it’s hard to deny that he should’ve and could’ve done something earlier. 

Megumi chews methodically down on his lips. “Yeah, I’m sorry.”

You nod slowly, making note of the way his voice strained, and face back to your monitors. “It’s fine, I probably shouldn’t have brought it up at work,” a pause and then you continue, “Also, I’m sorry about acting like you’re the plague, too. It’s just—people don’t normally work with their ex’s, you know?” You whisper.

He sighs, there’s a finality to it, and puts back his ear bud. “Mhm, I don’t want to think about it.”

Yeah. It’s stupid. It’s stupid and somehow it really sucks, too. You’re absentmindedly nodding and maybe, you think, there’s a quick flicker of that same unnamed emotion you keep noticing from Megumi, one that somehow forces your stomach to twist up, making your insides all confused. 

“Okay, that’s fair enough,” you say, and you forget about it, at least for now.

After a few days, working with Megumi is like clockwork. 

Greetings are short and brief or none at all. If he needed something, he would contact Toge or Maki since they’re the ones supposed to be in charge of him. If he ever needed to grab something from you… well it’ll just be exchanged via email or the work group chat — nothing ever in person. Which you’re happy that you’re both on the same page. Also, thank god for Zoom Meetings having a recording option. There was no way in actual hell you were going to sit through a two hour long call with your ex sitting across from you.

It’s halfway through the work week and nearing the end of the day. You’ve successfully got off the call with a client and just sent over the finalized web design to the rest of the team. 

Yuki Tsukumo, a self-made billionaire, reached out to the company three months back regarding a new app launch she had in mind. Ironically for you, it’s a dating app specifically designed for second chances and heartbreaks. Did you mentally suffer a couple of breakdowns from this? Of course.

Are you going to suffer another one because Gojo is currently ordering a last minute meeting with you and Megumi in a conference room? Yeah.

“What the fuck,” you say, intelligently. “Are you—are you crying?”

“W-What makes you think that,” Gojo sneezes into an already damp tissue. He’s got a stupid Christmas-themed sweater on, even got a themed set of earrings in, too. A little necklace with red and white candy cane beads hangs from his neck, and he’s got a dumb temporary reindeer tattoo on his cheek. Gojo is so themed that it’s almost disgusting. “Why would I—why would I—” and he bursts into tears.

You outwardly groan and Megumi stays quiet but makes his annoyance evident with a deep furrow of his brows. You do not like where this is going. Gojo breaking down combined with Geto suddenly taking off only means that—

“You want us to take over the planning.” Megumi concludes in a flat tone.

“F-For the party—yes,” Gojo hiccups and, fuck, is he also drunk on the job right now?

“Did you and Geto have a fight again?” You deadpan. 

“No.” Gojo frowns, going cross eyed. It’s not adorable at all, completely different from how he usually depicts himself to the rest of the office, which is why both you and Megumi stealthily slip out your phones and snap a quick picture… for blackmail purposes. “I-I was just…”

“We’ll do it,” you actually didn’t want to know the details, but you are slightly amused by how things turned out the way they did. “So, why are you drunk?”

Gojo opens his mouth, closes it, and opens it again. “ ‘m not drunk enough to tell you the whole story,” he gravely replies.

Megumi scoffs as he graciously gets out of his seat. “Well, if that’s all then I’m going back to my desk.”

And, of course, in the end it comes down to Megumi fucking Fushiguro being your co-assistant to organizing the biggest end of the year dinner celebration. A ten thousand bonus is on the line and you could really use a long vacation afterwards. 

Gojo sends you to a file containing the event plans that they’ve completed so far and what’s missing. Food has already been covered, Gojo has a fancy restaurant catering information listed down, one he raves constantly about their tiramisu. Below that Geto makes a brief comment about needing an after party reservation at any local bar. Holiday decor still needs to be ordered and a DJ still needs to be booked. Not to mention setting up the office, organizing activities, creating and sending out emails to every—

“I’ll handle coordinating with the vendors, you can focus on the internal tasks.”

You blink. “What?”

He blinks in return. “What do you mean ‘what’?”

And, when you don’t say anything back, he continues.

“I’ll stay out of your way,” Megumi has his back turned to you. He’s unable to catch your slight frown. Those words should be a good sign. The less contact, the better. But hearing it makes your stomach clench uncomfortably, and you find yourself casting around for something to say back. 

You try to open your mouth to speak, but it’s a bunch of gibberish, nonsense syllables, the only recognizable word being a bleary, “together”. 

“Together?”

“We can work on it together,” you rephrased it more clearly.

Megumi tenses his shoulders and whips his head around, holding a slight sneer, though you aren’t sure if it’s meant for you or just towards the odd situation. “We are, that’s why I’m splitting the responsibilities up.”

“No, I mean like—”

“You don’t have to force anything.” Megumi says, running fingers through his unkempt hair. “I don’t want to make things more awkward than they already are.”

Of course, that sets you off a bit uneasily. You look around in the office and, once you realize that it’s just the two of you, you pull Megumi by his sleeves and find the nearest empty conference room. 

“You look upset,” you huff, completely ignoring the way he’s pouting. 

“I’m not upset,” Megumi shoots back, but his words are far too quick, a little bit heated, and he flushes instantly. He knows that he’s not fooling anyone, especially you.

You sigh, leaning your back against the wall next to the door. “Maybe not to others,” you begin, “I don’t want to sound like an ass but…” and you instinctively cringe when you think back to Gojo’s words from the beginning, “We have to work together for this project, at least.”

“I don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable,” Megumi confesses, and you see the weight coming off of his shoulders as he says it. It sounded like he wasn’t planning on bringing this up at all, but the words are soon tumbling out. “Just… trying to get out of your way, you know? I still kinda need time to process everything.”

“Ah,” you’re looking down at your shoes, suddenly feeling… shy? Confused? You're watching him out of the corner of your eye. 

Megumi breathes out a long sigh, fixes the wrinkles in his sleeves, and leans forward, brushing shoulders with you as he reaches for the handle. “I’ll cooperate,” he forces out.

“Megumi,” you say quietly, and you’re watching his knuckles turn white as he grips the knob just a bit too tightly. “Let’s just start over, okay?”

He frowns, and he masks it after a moment, you know how to get him stirring in his emotions, because the thought appears to give him a pause. Megumi’s eyes widen a bit, and he’s back to chewing his lip, a bad habit he’s always had, before smoothing out again.

“That’s complicated, you know that,” Megumi says finally. 

You have no right to judge his answer, considering that you also played along in this weird tip-toe dance that you’ve both set. But is it really that complicated? Sure, you’re still pissed about what transpired during the relationship and ‘break up’, if you even want to call it that, but how long are you going to pretend that he’s not an important figure in your life?

“Life is complicated,” you stare into his eyes. “So work with me here, Megumi.”

You begin to feel better when you check off the final bullet point on Gojo’s ridiculously long event planner. Miraculously, the two of you manage to have everything prepared before the end of the month, even if it means working slight overtime together. Not that either of you had minded, it seemed after that conversation, there’s been less tension. You’re both trying to move on from the past and that’s the part of growing up, like it or not, and things don’t really fall neatly in place anymore. 

So, when you get to the restaurant, you realize something real fast.

The seating arrangements are absolutely staged. 

It’s a small izakaya, so the price to rent the whole place out wasn’t as expensive as some of the places Gojo had listed down as recs in the previous email but, because of its limited space, you knew it was going to be a tight squeeze for all twenty of you guys.

For starters, it was apparent from the moment you sat down that no one wanted to sit next to you. You were wondering if it had to do anything with your body odor before noting two very important things — one, Megumi was going to be the last one to arrive because he’s picking up the cake and two, everyone was staring intently when he entered the restaurant and had no choice but to sit next to you. You were trying so hard not to get distracted but the scent of his familiar cologne and the proximity of his body heat traveled to the forefront of your mind.

Three shots of tequila followed by five lemon drops later and both of your supervisors have disappeared from the dinner table. You vaguely make out a trail of unraveled ties and belts down the restaurant’s bathroom hallway in the corner, no surprise guessing what your bosses are doing — hint, it’s probably with each other. Aside from that, you’re currently trying not to let yourself get distracted by the obvious questions that your other coworkers are currently throwing to you and Megumi.

“We heard from a little birdie that you two are ex’s?” Todo throws the fucking rock out there. 

Everyone is either currently drunk or getting to the point of being tipsy. One look at Toge and he has the word ‘culprit’ written all over his smug, redden face. You’d imagine that he told everyone at the table about it when you and Megumi excused yourselves to the restroom separately earlier in the night. Mai is giggling up a storm and Yuuji looks like he’s one sip away from making weird hand puppets of you two kissing. Maybe it’s hypocritical on your part, but you don’t get why they’re making such a big deal out of it. It’s not like you and Megumi are actually making the work environment uncomfortable and it’s also not like you guys are getting back together by seeing each other every day… right?

But you have to wonder, vaguely, when your body’s going to stop doing that weird, fluttering thing it does every time Megumi does look at you. You almost spill your drink everywhere when you catch his eyes again and mutter a string of curses under your breath, forcing your attention back to actually doing some damage control before it gets out of hand. 

The only way to stop them from spreading unnecessary rumors is to own up to it. The more you deny, the more relentless teasing you’ll receive. Both you and Megumi drain a shot of tequila for the sake of courage before answering Todo’s unwarranted question.

“Yes.”

“No.”

You stare at each other in disbelief before switching your answers in a panic. 

“No!”

“Yes!”

Yuuji starts nervously laughing and scratches his cheek. “Uh, guys…”

“We’re not—”

“We broke up—”

“You gonna take him out on a date?” Todo digs into his food, eyes never leaving the two of you. For some reason, you think he’s enjoying this a bit too much.

Megumi seems to pick up on this and groans. “I’m going outside for a bit,” he removes himself from his seat and pointedly avoids all the disappointed drunk mumblings from his coworkers as he makes a beeline towards the entrance with his coat in hand.

Okay, yeah, he’s smart for not falling for that. You, on the other hand, start pawing at your lap. 

“We’re not dating,” you correct Todo, and basically everyone at the table.

“What if… he thinks you’re dating and you don’t?” Yuuji slurs his words, half of his body is basically leaning against the tabletop.

You highly doubt anything you’ve done together would be considered date worthy. You’re pretty sure Megumi feels the same way and everything is exaggerated at this point. Suddenly, you feel really out of your element here, and this burst of anxiety, one that leaves you squirming in your seat, has you itching for fresh air.

“I’ll be right back,” you quickly excuse yourself, grabbing your belongings along.

It didn’t take you long to find him. Megumi is standing off to the side underneath the building’s overhang, eyes glued to the road, silently watching the first snowfall of the month before taking notice of your presence. He flashes you a soft nod and scoots a little to the left, inviting you into his space, which you end up taking.

“When are you planning to leave?” Megumi asks. His face is flushed at this point, the first couple of buttons of his collared shirt are open, and his sleeves are rolled up. He’s got his jacket tossed across his shoulder and, you soon realize, that your ex looks stupidly mesmerizing under the shitty neon lights outside the restaurant. 

The answer had been “in about ten minutes” but somewhere between your brain and mouth, the words had taken a detour to Megumi’s long lashes, because instead you say, “Whenever you leave, I guess.”

It’s not like you actually have plans after this anyway. Your apartment might need a deep holiday cleaning after wasting the last couple of weeks working overtime, and you might need to pay the grocery store a little visit to actually start cooking yourself a healthy meal, but that can all wait. 

Megumi makes a strange straggled noise at your response and hides his surprise through a long sigh, “So…” 

You cock a brow. “So?” You echo back.

Another sigh from Megumi and he finally floods out his words. “The next train arrives in fifteen, we can both make it if you’re fine with leaving now.”

It’s a rare invitation and, despite the initial tension, there’s no way in hell that both of you are letting this opportunity go. 

You say yes in an instant, fixing your winter coat around your body and doing a quick three-second check to see if you have everything only to notice that your phone is missing.

“Oh, um—”

“I’ve got it right here,” Megumi fishes out your phone from his pocket and hands it over. “Figured that you would’ve accidentally left it behind.”

For a moment, you wonder if you’re on one of those hidden camera shows. But the look that Megumi gives you, the look that you’re all too familiar with a year ago, it’s there written all over his face. You realize that you are, fortunately, not on a reality show — the alcohol and snow might be paid actors — and your ex, tipsy and but wildly attentive towards you, is completely still infatuated.

You take it without questioning. When you check the phone battery, it doesn’t surprise you to see it almost fully charged too. He’s always been the worry wart, even if he doesn’t show it half the time. 

“Gojo recommended this new book series to me,” Megumi says with a small grin, changing the topic. You’re grateful for that, slightly. Even though you can’t quite meet his eyes, your gaze lingers on the way his hand is idly tugging at a loose thread on his shirt, or the way that he’s subtly kicking at the growing pile of snow in the corner, like he can’t stay still. It’s endearing, and you’re left wondering what’s actually going through his mind outside of all things surface level.

You find yourself mimicking his smile, already knowing what might come next. “Bet it’s either a series about friendship and adventure or the nastiest smut he could find in the romance section.” You reply, rolling your eyes. 

Megumi lets out a choked laugh, and almost drops his coat. You hide a giggle of your own. “Not anything like that, but I wouldn’t be surprised.” Megumi momentarily eyes you, but then reaches for his phone, pulling it out and thumbs the title ‘Sorcery Fight’ into the search bar. Tons of images pop up, many featuring fanart of who you assumed to be the main character — white hair, wears a blindfold, oddly charismatic in its character description — wait, this all sounds oddly fishy. 

“Another self projection?” You realize, instantly. 

“Maybe,” Megumi agrees before shifting his weight around, rocking back and forth on the balls of his feet. “Did you want to check it out tomorrow…?” He briefly makes eye contact and diverts his attention back to his phone. “If you’re free, that is.” He quickly adds.

You pretend to be in deep thought for a moment, leaving Megumi wondering if he said something he shouldn’t have, because the look on his face screams ‘oh god, have I gone too far’ under all of his aloof persona. 

“Maybe.”

“Maybe?”

“Yeah, maybe I’ll be free.”

Almost uncharacteristically, Megumi lets out a, “Fuck you,” and that seems like the wittiest response in the world, in that moment. 

It descends you into a full on giggling fit, and Megumi can’t help it, your laughter is contagious, and now you’re both giggling, on the verge of leaning against each other helplessly as the winter air is howling rough and bitter around. It’s a damn good thing that the alcohol is still running through your veins, giving you both that hot feeling of dumb immortality. 

“Let’s go catch that train,” he looks forward but extends a hand towards you, when you firmly clasp around his fingers, the slightest shade of red coats his cheeks and you’re positive it wasn’t from the weather. 

Of course, Megumi ends up at your apartment after you decided at the last minute to pick up crappy, greasy takeout food on the way back at nearly one in the morning. The buzz from the drinks have worn off, but you find yourself slowly gaining confidence scooting besides Megumi as both of you take a seat on the carpeted floor in front of your incredibly dusty coffee table. It’s covered in finger smudges and scratches from all the other previous nights of takeout meals and accidental bumps. You pray that Megumi doesn’t point them out, but a part of you is glad when he wordlessly starts cleaning some of the spots away. 

Kinda feels like the old times, you think.

“You ever think that we’re the ones who can’t see what’s going on?” You ask during an opening scene to a British comedian podcast show. It’s a news channel that Megumi likes to watch sometimes, despite not believing half of whatever that’s being reported. Out of the corner of your eyes, you could’ve sworn Megumi’s cheeks are flushing, but it’s hard to tell in the dark.

It’s the takeout food talking. The fries and milkshake combo is making your stomach do weird little flips—or maybe it was from Megumi being close? 

You tip your head back, looking out your window, because the thought of looking at Megumi is… hard right now. It makes your heart tight, your throat dry. You’re wondering if he’s even going to show up at your door the next morning, or if you’ll see him the next work day and he’ll make a passing comment about how dumb everything was. Hell, would you even remember this tomorrow with how late it’s getting?

“I’m pretty sure we’re the ones who know what’s up,” Megumi replies, but the words sound hollow, coming from his lips.

“Maybe,” you say, quickly, and the laughter you force out carries the same empty sound that his voice did. “Next time, we should probably have a drink limit to keep them from chatting their asses off.”

“Or never letting them drink again,” Megumi agrees, somewhat, before stealing a piece of fry from your plate.

You hum before testing the waters and letting half of your body go slack against his shoulders. Everything is experimental at this point, so you’re glad when he doesn’t push you away, instead, Megumi leans into your touch, just a little.  

“How’s your family? Are they well?” He asks over a news segment. It’s about a modern urban legend, sort of like Bigfoot, but it’s just a guy cohabiting with a giant crocodile. This makes Megumi laugh. 

“They are! Parents finally retired so now it’s just me working while they’re relaxing at home.” You let the story wrap up before firing back the same question. “And you?”

“Dad’s still working overseas,” Megumi says with a slight frown. 

He’s never really talked about his father, even when you two were together, all you know is that it’s been a complicated relationship since his mother passed away when he was young. His father tried his best raising him all on his own while balancing work, though half of the time Megumi rarely saw him growing up. There’s a bit of resentment, you think, it’s understandable but you can also tell Megumi still holds him high to a certain degree. 

“You guys have been talking more though, right?” You vaguely recall a faded memory. 

To this, Megumi smiles fondly. “Yeah, we have. Once a month, if he’s not terribly caught up with whatever he’s doing.” 

Turns out neither of you have figured out his father’s occupation, which might be for the better. Megumi thinks it’s gang related, and doesn't give it too much thought as long as his father is safe. You, on the other hand, have thought of it being related to overseas construction work, something less… imaginative and dangerous.

“I’m glad to hear that, and also glad you’re doing well for yourself.” 

“Yeah,” and Megumi shifts a bit to get a better look at you. There’s fondness in his eyes that steels you to sit up a bit straighter. “I could say the same thing for you.”

“Well, my apartment could use a bit more loving,” you laugh, “It’s a bit hard to manage everything sometimes.”

“Maybe I can help?” Megumi says this with a straight face and you’re wondering if somehow the apple juice with his takeout order is somehow spiked with hard cider. 

When somehow you didn’t pick up a hint of alcohol from his breath, from how close you’re sitting against him, you choke on your saliva. “You’re serious about that, Megumi?”

“What? Don’t believe me?”

“No,” you say the words instantly, far too quickly, and feel the immediate warmth spreading to your cheeks, even if you’re trying to look cool and collected. 

“Well,” Megumi tips his head to the side, eyes narrowed. “It’s getting late,” he points out.

You glance at your wall clock and, sure enough, it’s three in the morning. You weren’t tired before but, somehow with him pointing it out, your eyes start to grow heavy. You’re grateful for the distraction and you think you just want Megumi to go away, but you know the second he does, you’re going to be obsessing over this conversation. Over the implications, the unsaid words between the fine lines, and well… just about everything that’s been there and been overcomplicated. And maybe Megumi is taking pity on you because he shifts his gaze to your face before settling a firm grip on both of your shoulders.

“Let’s get you to bed.” Megumi scoots a little closer, and you have a moment of panic. Then, you realize that he’s silently asking for permission to lift you up. “Are you planning to sleep out here?” 

“Are you leaving right after?” You catch yourself staring at him, a bit too longing, and jerk your head down but he catches your chin, before you can fully pull yourself away. 

“No, I’m staying,” he breathes out, his voice a low rumble in your ears. “Is that fine?”

You weren’t expecting that particular answer. You slowly lift your head away, gently freeing yourself from his touch, but staying close enough to nudge your shoulder up against his. Megumi is trying—he’s trying really hard to be open and you feel like your nerves are raging in your body again, although this time, it’s not an entirely uncomfortable feeling.

“I would like that,” Megumi smiles at that, and he lets you lean a head on his shoulder while he slips an arm around your waist, pulling your sleepy figure up, and both of you slip into a comfortable silence. 

© 2023 DOOBEA. do not copy any of my writing and translate/repost.

TAGLIST: @hellothere9597 @sad-darksoul

[l0cal-catb0y]

Hero!Ghoap x God!Reader brainrot

Had some insane brainrot while listening to music, this is going to be word vomit but like, i have to share it w/ yall and i didnt read this back so it may be a lil wonky (first cod post too wow) idk man its bad but whatever

Reader being a lesser known god who only has a few shrines and a tiny group of worshippers and hero!ghoap being incredibly well known and strong fighters who stumble across one of your shrine while looking for a place to rest. maybe it's abandoned or something but while theyre resting they investigate you and your history and end up leaving you some offerings for letting them have safety while healing up. Maybe you get a little excited cuz the heros all the gods are talking about are leaving you gifts!! just for being kind!! hehe you send them a sign that you are watching over you and helping them as much as you can even after they leave your shrine to continue their journey <33 you only have a few followers so you can actively pay attention to ghost and soap unlike the other gods who are so so busy. Ghost notices first that youre always watching over them when he starts seeing your associated animals and plants everywhere they go (can be whatever you want but im picturing a type of bird) and ghost feels unsure if its actually you but after it becomes a pattern he points it out to Soap who had a feeling they were being tailed as well. Now they start gathering little trinkets after their battles and leaving them in places that remind them of you like flower fields or by rivers. I feel like soap would become such a devoted follower so quickly while ghost is still a little wary, he doesnt know your intentions and there is barely any information about you out in the world. I think a few weeks or months later ghost would join soap in being one of your most devoted followers. I feel like they would create you an altar near where you live or move closer to the original shrine they discovered you at <33

also thinking about how they would react if you disappeared, specifically a war broke out between the gods and you get gravely injured and in a panic descend to earth by the boys' shrine before passing the fuck out. just the boys showing up to leave offerings but seeing you bleeding out on the altar, they both rush to you can try to stabilize you the best they can from experiences when patching each other up,,, once they clean you up they bring you back to their home and placing you in their bed, they sit next to you discussing what the fuck happened and who they have to hurt to get you justice.

maybe ill write more later but yeah hope yall liked my mess of an idea

[cryptidghostgirl]

heyhey! You said you had a request but couldn’t see it and in case it was mine here i am once again humbling asking you to feed my delusions. I am the same person who asked for the one with the fake dating trope and the one where reader spawns into the lobby :))

But i am here now going for a more angsty route! >:) Granted, this is more of an OC x Alastor but im describing it more generic for the populace BUT HERE GOES

right before “Cover me” reader kept silently glancing over at Alastor which was on the dance floor, subconsciously making him approach her. He goes of course they have a (Important for later) conversation like “I havent seen you around here. Are you new around town?” “Just moved in actually~” “Well, Id love to give you a tour someday, the names Alastor” and he kisses her hand “Ah a charmer, ill have to be careful around you” (OR A MORE ELEGANT CONVERSATION THEN THAT I SUCK AT DIALOGUE) then theres the knife and gun scene and the team up

And then they get together after about a year or two and I dont wanna say theyre legally married but eventually use wife and husband terms because its more fancy and gives them more respect in eyes of others but they have been together for around 5 years at this point.

but then the events of 1925 happen where readers twin brother dies because some bastards set fire to his house and Reader has an argument with Alastor before eventually going alone to avenge her brother (theyre like “theres too many, youll die” “so be it!”)

Reader kills them all (duh) but because it was January and extremely cold she eventually gets hypothermia and during the delusions it gives she stumbles and gets impaled on an abandoned rusty fence spike and dies :3

Alastor find her and gives her a proper burial and 8 years later in 1933 while visiting readers grave he gets shot canonically

But these 8 years gave reader enoigh time in hell to establish her own dominance and due to the life she lived and the death of hypothermia- she gets turned into a sort of blizzard demon. Around 180 cm with black limbs, white fluffy hair and fluffy ears and a white tail as a sinner form and for the demon form im thinking of the faceless Room Guardians by Anyaboz on Instagram (incredible artist btw) with ice powers like summoning weapons and ice spikes and ice touches and moving freely (like Kindred’s wolf in League) in her blizzard. Taking over half the pentagram like this-

Until 1933 when Alastor pops up in hell, does his demon business and eventually wants to check out these frozen parts and goes into a bar very similar to the one they met and sees reader at the table and then THEY HAVE THE EXACT SAME CONVERSATION THEY HAD WHEN THEY FIRST MET (maybe with the knife and gun scene too hehe) and theyre both like “i forgive you” or smth idk maybe they just have a silent agreement- either way.

After they met the blizzard stops and no one knows why or who did it :>, readers identity as the blizzard demon remaining a secret

BTW I LOVE YOU FOR MAKING MY DREAMS COME TRUE- if you want more i have a ton of ideas because brain rot- (also lil side note i kind of imagine reader as albino because it would fit my ocs lore a bit more- but keeping it basic would fit everyones ideas of their own reader so! do what you please you already made my day better by reading my ideas come to life :3))

yes!! i did see yours and it is currently in third place for requests i need to fill so ill probably get it done by this weekend, early next week at the latest. it’s just taking me a bit because i’m in midterms rn and also i want to make sure i get in all the details :) i think it might’ve been a request for alastor’s mom reader x lucifer?? i recall getting one about that but can’t seem to find it anywhere. long story short,, your request is in progress and i will post it as soon as i have the time to finish it up :)

UPDATE: This piece has officially been posted as of Friday February 23rd, 2024.

Frostbite (Alastor x Reader)

[pineappleciders]

Hello there ciders! Is nice to see that your requests are open again ^^

Me wants angst (hurt/comfort) so 👀

Clyde, Gregory (if ya write for him), Damien, Kenny and Stan when someone literally points them out that they've been ignoring reader for like a week because they were speding all their attention on other friend and that they now are a crying and confused mess in their room (the room of the character that pointed that out).

Ofc you don't have to do it If you don't feel like it! <3 Stay hydrated and don't forget to eat, take breaks est and sleep a good amount of hours ^^

clyde, damien, kenny, and stan unintentionally ignoring reader; platonic hurt/comfort

A/N: HIII!! i havent had a lot of experience writing hurt/comfort but i hope this will suffice. im also not great at writing for clyde but i tried!! the friend character has been hanging out with is not specificed and is referred to as F/N. and thank you!!!

i wanted to write a gregory segment but honestly i think its hard to fully depict his personality as he was only in the movie, so i apologize!! :(

reader is referred to with they/them pronouns

clyde donovan

clyde can be. very..... unaware sometimes. so it probably doesn't click that he hasn't been talking to you until someone hammers it into his brain. when he realizes he feels really stupid and guilty

"clyde! dude, i need to talk to you." tolkien rushes into the living room, where clyde and his friends were playing games on the couch.

clyde gets up and looks at him, as tolkien takes him into the next room. "what's wrong?"

tolkien looks kinda uncomfortable. "it's Y/N. they had a total breakdown in my room. they said something about you, i don't know what to do."

clyde,, doesn't like to hear this. he's actually kinda scared to go in there and see you crying, but the fact that you mentioned him has him kinda curious.

he lightly knocks on the door before creaking it open. "...Y/N?"

he sees you, awkwardly curled up in tolkien's racecar bed, sniffles and hiccups sounding throughout.

he hesitates for a bit, stumped on what to do, before stepping in and shutting the door behind him. he plays with his fingers.

he's incredibly nervous, but he steps closer to you, trying to get a better look at your face. "Y/N?"

you look up, and upon recognizing clyde's face, you sit up and wipe your tears. "o-oh. hey, man. what's- what's up?"

he's really stumped now. what does he say?????

"uh, i was checking if you're alright. did- did something happen?" clyde seems to kick his foot a little, seemingly trying to look at everything in the room but you.

you continue to wipe your face with your sleeve. "um- no, not really. it isn't-" you stop yourself, and an inner conflict is visible on your face. you sigh.

"y'know what, whatever. clyde, why- are- i feel like- like you've been avoiding me." you look away.

it doesn't process at first. "huh? avoiding you?"

you sniffle. "i mean, yeah. you've been, like- not talking to me and stuff and it seems like you're always busy. did i do something?"

"... but we're hanging out right now, right?"

"...... well yeah but it's different.. i mean like, alone. like you keep walking past me in school, and, when i wanted to be your lab partner, you-" you pause and hiccup. "agh, this is stupid, i'm sorry dude."

you can see the gears turning in clyde's head. "so, you think i've been ignoring you on purpose? i haven't... oh." he kinda has a durr moment and realizes the events of the past week.

he grimaces. "oughh, i just realized i've been hanging out with F/N way more lately.. i'm sorry, man. i didn't mean to make you feel left out."

you look at him again, with a little hope in your eyes. "wait.. so, you're not mad at me?"

he shakes his head. "no. i just kinda got busy, sorry for ignoring you. we can be partners for mr. garrisons next project, OK?"

you wipe your cheeks once more and nod. "yeah, OK."

he does a stupid lil grin, one that's strangely encouraging. "c'mon, we gotta get a slice of pizza before the guys eat it all!"

damien thorn

he's erm. very confused as to why it bothers you that much

he tries to be sympathetic though. keyword tries

"oh, dear. damien, i'm so glad you've come! ...what happened between you and Y/N?"

"... ?"

"well, it's just that.. i was talking to them and it seems you've been ignoring them for about a week or so."

"..." he thinks for a moment. "..not on purpose."

pip plays with his hands a bit. "well, i think you should go have a chat with them. they're up in my room."

damien looks at him with an unreadable expression, before making his way up the steps. he stands in front of pip's door, unsure what to do with his hands.

damien opens the door, and you look up from your spot on the bed. "damien, uh, hey, dude.." you quickly wipe your face and look at him.

he stands there for a moment, the both of you feeling the awkwardness kick in fast

"..pip wanted me to talk to you."

"'bout what?"

"about me ignoring you. i didn't do it on purpose." you can tell it strains him to explain himself.

you wipe your cheeks a bit more. "i- i know you didn't, but.. i dunno. i saw you and F/N hanging out and- you seemed really happy."

you have to admit, it's a little strange sharing your feelings of friendship with the son of satan.

".. i'm here now."

"...?"

"i'm here, hanging out with you. would you prefer i left?"

"i- no!" you find yourself speaking louder than intended. "i-i mean, no, i don't."

his head tilts a little. "then what is it that you want?"

you rub your arm, once again feeling like a shrimp in the presence of a shark. "well- maybe we could just, hang out. i dunno. you and me."

damien thinks for a moment, before nodding his head. "very well. we shall go play xbox at your house."

"really?"

"yes. now come, we must leave quickly so pip doesn't ask any questions."

"hah, okay."

in the hallway, right before you walk down the stairs, you hear damien mutter, "i didn't ignore you on purpose."

you chuckle and pat his shoulder. "yeah, buddy. i know."

kenny mccormick

god. he feels so bad about it.

i can see him being kinda confused on why it upset you so much,, but he does get it to an extent and he's just like. damn.

"dude, kenny, have you been ignoring Y/N?"

"mmph? mph!" (what? no!)

"they started crying because they thought you were, you should probably go talk to them in my room."

he opens the door and he's incredibly confused why you were crying next to stan's bed with your knees to your chest.

"mmph, mmph mph?" (dude, what's wrong?) he slowly sits next to you, putting his hand on your shoulder

you sniffle and look away. "can.. can you tell me why you're upset with me?"

".... mmph? mph mmph mmmf mmph mph!" (.... what? i'm not upset with you!) he's really confused now. what ever gave you that idea?

you look at him a bit oddly, wiping a few of your tears. "then.. why were you ignoring me?"

he ponders for a moment, trying to scan through the week that's passed since you two last hung out. to him, it just seems like you two haven't really had time to talk...

and then it hits him that he's been hanging around F/N a lot recently. as a result, you two haven't talked at all. to him, it really wasn't that big of a deal, but he feels bad when he realizes that you thought he didn't want to be around you anymore.

"mm, mmph... mph mmphph, mmph. mmf mmf mmmphph mmph mmf mph mph mmmph mmph... mmf mmph mmmph." (aw, man... i'm sorry, Y/N. i've been hanging around F/N a lot recently and.. i didn't realize.) he seems sheepish, and rubs his arm.

kenny gets up and extends his hand to you to take. "mmf mmph mmph mph mph, mmph? mmph mmmph." (i'm not mad at you, okay? i promise.)

you look at him, still a little weary, but relieved that it was just in your imagination. "yeah.. yeah, okay. thank you, kenny." you take his hand and he pulls you up.

you can't see his smile because of his parka, but you see his cheeks lift and his eyes crinkle, almost as if he's giving you a pep talk through his eyes.

"mmf mmph mmph! mmphh mmph mmf mm mmpph mmmph! "now, come on! stan's mom is making tuna helper!)

stan marsh

"oooof, jeez..." he's like scratching the back of his head and grimacing. like he doesn't know what to say but he feels very guilty

"stan, what's up with you and Y/N?"

"huh? what do you mean?"

"they said you've been avoiding them for like a week, what happened?" kyle crosses his arms.

"avoiding them? i haven't been avoiding them! we hung out like..... last friday..."

"well, whatever happened, it had them pretty upset at my house yesterday. they started crying about it right before we went to bed."

stan is incredibly confused. he knows it's been a bit since you two hung out, but he didn't think it was that serious!

he tries to look for you around school, hoping to maybe find you in the cafeteria or in the hallways, but nothing.

he sighs, entering the bathroom, but perks up once he sees you, washing your hands.

"Y/N! dude, i've been looking for you everywhere!" stan runs up to you, his face showing an emotion somewhere between awkwardness and relief.

you look a little down as you greet him. "hey, stan. what's up?" you dry your hands and face him.

he averts his eyes a little. "um... kyle was talking to me earlier, about how you slept over at his place yesterday? and, about..." he trails off, looking to find the right words.

you realize what he's talking about, and get a little embarrassed. "oh, yeah. i... i wanted to talk to you about it, but i didn't really know how to.."

his voices gets a little softer. "listen, um, i didn't mean to ignore you. F/N and i have been hanging out a lot recently, and, i dunno, i guess i kinda got caught up in it. i'm not mad at you or anything." he fidgets with his hands a little.

you look up a little. "oh, well, that's a relief." you say, with a little chuckle in your voice. "i.. i was kinda worried you didn't wanna be friends anymore.. but i guess i was overreacting."

stan looks at you. "it's fine, dude. you didn't overreact. i'm sorry." he puts his hand on your shoulder and squeezes it a little, giving a small reassuring smile.

you smile back. stan's always had a sort of hard time finding words to comfort people, so it means a lot that he's trying.

he pats your back, before looking nervous. "now, if you'll excuse me, i really have to shit." he runs into the stall, slamming it shut.

you chuckle and leave before the smell hits you.

[kindestofkings]

a mastermind [2]

ryan mcmahon x reader

faceclaim: phoebe bridgers

authors note: happy friday everyone, proud of you for making it through the week xx @orangeinecstasy here you are <3

2022

yourusername just added to their story!

replies:

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yourusername

liked by elijahhewson and others

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ryanmcmahon_15

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2023

yourusername

liked by julienrbaker and others

yourusername heyy its been while sorry! unplanned mysterious retreat but I've busy writing, busy recording with my fellow geniuses and busy rehearsing!

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taylorswift

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ryanmcmahon_15 with yourusername

liked by bobbyskeetz and others

ryanmcmahon_15 with yourusername welll we (one of us, defo not me) had planned a long softlaunch stage which was VERY detailed, but an eagle eyed fan caught us out ! big thanks to them cause theres cool pics to post :))

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yourusername

liked by ryanmcmahon_15 and others

yourusername just before I retreat into my home for the holidays and eat nothing but minced pies and never get out of my pjs, I thought I'd leave you guys with a parting gift from my family to yours. so much wine is a craft of love and is everything I think of when I think of the holiday season, theres some oldies, some newbies, some saddies and some friends !

a big thank you to dirtyhit as usual and the genius producers that are trumanblack, bedfordanes75 and rass75 ( all who jumped on a track also)

other friends who graced these records, taylorswift, lucydarcus, hozier and julienrbaker thank you thank you <33

also someone stepped away from the drums for a hot second and made his vocals debut, which I feel honoured about and so proud!

go listen and enjoy <333

view all comments

ryanmcmahon_15 the album and you are a work of art <3

yourusername stfu imma cry 😢

ynfan1 you write melancholy so beautifully, love it all so far!

inhalerfan1 ryan with a vocal debut?? christmas came early

inhalerfan2 obsessed with both of you, you are my parents

elijahhewson thankful everyday sir ryan chose drums or I'd be out of a job..

bobbyskeetz theres still time yet!

joshjenkinson_ thanks for inviting us onto the album!

yourusername it was my PLEASURE sir jenkinson

trumanblack always a pleasure making stuff together bedfordanes75 xx

yourusername we are such a powerhouse of a trio, like the powerpuff girls or something ! ynfan1 not 😭 the 😭 powerpuff 😭 girls 😭

-finished-

Ahh what was that you ask?? can ryan sing?? All important questions! I dont know entirely, all my fics are self-indulgent but this one was particularly bad hahah hence the all over the place plot, also im in a festive mood lol. I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THO, as always let me know what you think and come chat <33

[peterpcrkcr]

Shy Girl | Peter Parker x Reader

Third person pov.

Requested by @z-iridest

3.4 k words. One shot. I definitely could see me writing more lol.

ʕ·ᴥ·ʔ

The final bell of school was about to roll on Monday. This wasn’t your average monday. It was the day a big news story was going to break and the nerves inside Peter Parker were building up.

“Alright everybody it’s the last week of school so listen up.” Mr. Harrington said in his usual anxious drol. “We have a lot to get through as you’re going to be seniors next year. That means more training, more studying, and more mental dexterity.”

No one was listening. A quiet roar of excited young minds sharing their summer plans drowned out the nearly useless info he was producing.

“Excuse me,” he said a little louder to possibly break through the chatter. “Don’t you guys care about my plans to hold up your brain prowess over the summer?”

“If I’m being honest, no.” Flash Thompson, the alternate for the team who rarely ever came to meetings spoke up. Everyone listened. Everyone except for Peter who was enthralled in a diagram he was making to keep his thoughts in order. There was too much he needed to do by the end of the week to make sure everything was covered for a full summer of crime saving. “We’re all busy worrying about what we actually give a shit about.”

“And what would that be Mr. Thompson?” The teacher asked, though plainly uninterested.

“The massive summer kickoff pool party I’m throwing this Saturday at my mansion!” He said to many cheers and applause of favor. Flash crossed his arms and nodded his head, a smug look of accomplishment across his face.

“Now that’s fine and all but we really need to be focusing on how you guys are going to-“ Mr. Harrington started to rebuff but a knock on the open door stopped him mid sentence.

“Um, Mr. Harrington?” A woman’s voice called from the doorway.

“Yes?” He responded as all the kids turned their heads toward the door.

“I know this is incredibly last minute but we have a new student at Midtown and even though the decathlon season is over, we’d like her to join now so she can feel nice and welcome come next semester.” The administrator spoke.

“Yes, that's fine.” Mr. Harrington said, adjusting his glasses on the bridge of his nose.

The female administrator closed the door, leaving the students to their chatter.

“Now- Flash don’t you think there are more important things to worry about than some party you won’t remember in 20 years?” Mr. Harrington posed to his most ruthless student.

“It’s okay Mr. Harrington, you don’t have to be sad that you were never invited to parties when you were in high school.” Flash responded to a gasp and a chuckle from the crowd.

Peter couldn’t have been more uninterested. Mind wrapped up in a web of tangled thoughts and nerves and worry. 17 years old and on top of the world. He died and was brought back after half of the planet disappeared. He made a hundred powerful friends and made the news a million times. Well, not him necessarily but he was still doing really well for himself. High grades, and life was pretty easy when Happy was in charge of him considering the man was so busy running Tony Stark's estate. A deep sadness hung over Peter though. Not only had so many great things happened, many terrible and heart wrenching things had as well. He felt a sharp heat start to prick the back of his neck.

“Im gonna go to the bathroom.” He said curtly as he stood quickly from the table to walk out of the room. He stopped just a little down the hallway, not even 20 feet from the classroom he was just in.

His breathing started to quicken. Sweat beads popped up on his forehead. His fists clenched at his sides. Maybe it was too much. He wasn’t even a legal adult and yet it was like the whole world was in his shoulders. And there didn’t seem to be single person who could possibly help lift it for him.

Peter closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Two. His shoulders relaxed. Three breaths and his fists unfurled. Four and the color returned to his face.

When he turned on his heel to head back to the room, he opened his eyes and saw a girl standing across the hall. He felt a shiver down his spine and his eyes went wide. The red returned to his face, but the color of embarrassment.

She met his gaze with wide eyes of her own. A hard pink blush bloomed over her cheeks for being caught. She had watched him leave the room and calm down. She looked down quickly.

“Been there long-?” He asked her. She nodded. “That’s embarrassing.”

“Don’t be embarrassed-“ she said quickly, still gazing at the floor. “I was doing the same thing.”

“What?” He asked, confused. “You were out here taking deep breaths so you didn’t freak out in front of everyone you know?”

“Not exactly.” She moved her foot to twiddle with a spare pencil on the ground. “I was taking deep breaths though.”

“Why?” Genuinely, Peter wanted to know.

“Well, I’m a new student during the last week of school and I’ve had an awkward day of being introduced to people who are already fully over the school year so they haven’t really cared about being super friendly.” She said glancing up at him.

“I care-“ Peter blurted out. She let out a soft burst of a laugh. “I mean. I care that you’re having a hard time. I’ve lived here my whole life so I don’t really have that problem, but I definitely know how you feel.”

“You do?” She asked, fully meeting his gaze.

“Yeah,” he smiled at her.

For a moment it was just the two of them standing in the hallway, looking into each others eyes. A silent understanding of emotion holding all of the space between them.

“Do you need help finding your class or something?” He offered.

“Ummm… not really. I was supposed to go into the room you came out of for another introduction but I couldn’t do it.” She looked away, at some student made poster celebrating the end of the school year. Peter looked over her with a soft gaze. She could feel his eyes tracing over her. “It was making me a little anxious.”

“Right-“ he stopped his eyes from wandering and placed a hand on the back of his neck. “Oh! You’re the new student!”

“Yeah.” She chuckled nervously. “That’s me.”

“I’m Peter.” He said offering the hand on the back of his neck to her.

She crossed the hallway and met his gaze. Peter’s eyes fluttered as her perfume filled his senses. Her skin looked soft and her hair was fluffed. Eyes a little red. Possibly from crying, he thought. When she took his hand he felt another shiver up his spine.

“I’m (y/n).” She smiled. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you too.” They dropped hands and immediately his hand felt cold again.

“We should probably head in.” She said ducking her head toward the classroom. Peter didn’t move his eyes from her. Something was different about her. Something gentle and soft. She reminded him of a doe. Delicate and stuck in the middle of the street. His weakness. “Peter?”

“Oh, yeah. We should.” He didn’t make a move to the room though. He couldn’t. This was the first time in months that he felt his mind quiet down.

For a silent beat they locked eyes once more. There was a tenderness to it. Sharing a moment of vulnerability with a complete stranger wasn’t common for most people, but Peter had had his fair share. This was different though, because she couldn’t see Spider-Man. She couldn’t see any of it. She only saw Peter. Midtown student and anxious student.

The bell rang, unleashing them from their gaze and the students from their rooms. As the doors flew open, endless conversations erupted into the hall, filling their warm silence.

Mr. Harrington and Flash hadn’t finished their debate about partying as they headed Peters way down the hall.

“Oh! Mr. Parker!” Mr. Harrington smiled. “You must’ve found our new student!”

“Come on now Porker, you didn’t think you could call dibs before anyone even saw her, did you?”

Flash said as he pulled Peter into a tight Noogie.

Peter shoved him with a little extra strength, making Flash clash just enough with Mr. Harrington to knock his glasses off his face. Students walking by trampled right over them. The poor broke teacher bent down and picked them up.

“It’s going to be a fun summer.” Mr. Harrington said, putting the shattered glasses back on. “See you guys Wednesday.”

With that, he was off.

“Whatever Porker.” Flash said, hurrying down the hall.

This left Peter and (y/n) alone once more. Even though it wasn’t even close to silent, when he looked at her he could only hear his own heartbeat in his ears.

“I guess that means the day’s over…” she said sheepishly.

“Y-yeah… right. Okay. Well I’ll see you Wednesday?” He asked. She nodded and started as though she would walk away. He gently pinched her elbow to stop her, which sent a shockwave from her skin to his fingertips as he did it. “Hey-“

“Y-yes?” She asked stopping close to him. So close he could feel the faintest sip of her breath on his face. She didn’t look at his eyes though. Her face was very red and he could almost hear how fast her heart was beating.

“If you need anything this week I’m here for you.” He said in earnest. When she looked into his eyes again he almost wanted to say forever, but forever was never a possibility for him.

“Th-thanks, Peter.” She said with the cutest stutter, her eyes drifting to his hand. He started to blush when he realized he was still holding her elbow. He dropped his hand and looked away. “See you around.”

“Yeah. See ya.” He said, and with that she was off.

——-

“Dude you missed Flash’s party announcement.” Peter said as he spun another web to swing on his way home from school. Ned Leeds, his best and most trusted friend, was on a video call in Peter’s mask.

“It’s not my fault my aunts came to town for the spring parade. We’re doing all the touristy stuff. I can’t tell you all the stuff I learned about the Chrysler Building today. I felt like I was in school anyway-“ Ned said making Peter grin. “Wait, since when do you care about Flash’s dumb parties? Especially after the one sophomore year?”

Peter’s eyes widened in surprised thought. Ned was right. Why did he care about the party?

“I don’t know. Other than that it was a normal day.” Peter said shaking it off

“Nah, I can tell something’s up with you. Is it about the news announcement today?” Ned asked. Peter had almost forgotten about that considering his mind was wrapped around (y/n) all day.

Peter smiled. He was glad to find out he wasn’t worrying about his usual problems. Something much more exciting had entered his life.

“Well there’s a new girl and she-“

“Dude no!” Ned said. “Leave it to you to meet someone the last week of school. I’ve been single since Betty and I broke up. Wait until college, dude. That’s where the babes will be.”

Peter laughed and shook his head as he dropped in the alley by his apartment for one. 17 and living alone. He could handle it but he had never been lonelier in his life.

“You wanna come over and play COD?” He asked as he threw his backpack in his apartment window.

“Nah, I can’t. My aunties want to go to that cafe where people scream Broadway music at you while you eat.” Ned said smacking his tongue on the top of his mouth.

“Don’t have too much fun.” Peter said jokingly.

“Oh I won’t.” Ned said making Peter chuckle to himself. “I’ll be at school tomorrow morning but I’m leaving at lunch to go see a matinee of Bye Bye Birdie.”

“On a Tuesday?” Peter asked.

“It’s a seniors only showing.” Ned responded. “With the alternate cast.”

“Good luck with that.” Peter said.

“Thanks. Honestly I think I need it more than you right now.”

“Catch ya later.” Peter said. Ned threw up a peace sign and the call was over.

Peter was about to climb inside when his spider senses started going off. Something was wrong.

He closed his window and took off out of the alley. He followed the hairs on his arms toward the feeling. He started to hear the commotion as he moved to the end of the street.

Two men were cornering a young woman by some bodega dumpsters.

“I don’t have anything-“ she said with a teary, terrified voice. “Please, just go!”

“Not gonna happen little lady.” One of the thugs said, rolling up his sleeve.

“Yeah, I see that gold watch you’re wearing. And it ain’t a fake.” The second moron said as they both moved closer to her. Her back was flush against the dumpster and Peter didn’t really have a good view of the situation. No time to waste.

He shot a web at the second thug and threw him hard against the wall of the electronics sales shop next door. (Y/n) screamed in shock.

The second thug turned and started barreling toward Peter, but Peter was faster. He threw one web at his feet, encasing them together. The thug fell flat on his face, but reached quickly into his pocket for a knife.

Peter dodged it, and as it flew by his face he shot a web and the thugs back and whipped him up and into the dumpster, hard.

At this point a small crowd had gathered to watch the spectacle. The local, and world, hero had saved another citizen of New York.

He took a step toward the girl and stopped. He recognized her. (Y/n). She was crying. Shaking. Eyes wide in fear. When he stepped toward her again she tensed up and stepped even more flush against the dumpster.

“Don’t be scared.” He said reaching a hand out. She eyed him. “I’m Spider-Man.”

She didn’t speak. Didn’t move. Fear locked her up. The doe in headlights. He wanted to rip his mask off and laugh and say “haha me again!” But he wouldn’t risk that secrets weight atop her head.

“You don’t have to be afraid.” He said softly, his hand still out-stretched. She looked at his hand and relaxed her shoulders. “You can trust me.”

“You just knocked two guys out cold in like a minute. I don’t know what you could do to me.” She said with a choked voice.

“I just saved you-“ he said surprised.

“Thank you for that, I’m just taken back. You… you really hurt them.” She looked at the man still unconscious on the ground by her feet. “He’s bleeding.”

“Yeah! I’m bleeding too!” The thug in the dumpster chimed in. Peter shook head head.

This wasn’t right. He just saved her. He just took two criminals off the map. She didn’t owe him anything, of course, but this was new.

“You’re sorry for the thugs?” He asked, dropping his hand to his side.

“Well, no…” she said, looking away. “Actually yes? Kind of? They’re still people, Spider-Man.”

“Yeah, bad people.” He said plainly.

The crowd watching were chatting amongst themselves and Peter knew he had to head out soon before the police came to investigate. And before the news bulletin came out.

“IN TODAYS NEWS!” A voice bellowed from one of the television at the electronic store. He felt every hair on his body stand straight.

“We need to go.” He said to her urging her gently with his hand stretched out to her once again. She shook her head.

“I’m not going anywhere with you.” She said matter of factly.

“SPIDER-MAN IS ANNOUNCED AS THE NEWEST MEMBER OF THE AVENGERS!” The voice bellowed. The crowd standing nearby started cheering. Clapping. And closing in on Peter and (Y/n).

“You’re an avenger?” She asked, marbled eyes looking into the animated eyes of his mask. He nodded.

“Yes, now let’s go.” He said stepping toward her. The crowd moved closer to them both.

“I said im not going with y-“ she didn’t have time to finish her sentence before he webbed her hip and pulled her into his side.

Up up and away to the heights of the skyscrapers and away from the investigative crowd of adoring fans.

“What the hell!” She exclaimed as her leftover tears flew from her face as they swung through town. “PUT ME DOOOOOWN!!”

She screamed into his ear, making his grip on a web falter just a little. She gripped him tighter and as he felt her body press against his, he felt an odd mix of emotions. Annoyance for the fact that she wasn’t very happy to be near him, but solace in the fact that she didn’t know it was Peter.

But if she did? If she could know he’d just saved her life would she still have those tender eyes for him in the hallway? Would she even look at him again?

“I’ve got you.” He said in a tone so soft she felt her breath relax in her chest. “Relax.”

“How!?! I’m like 100 feet high!” She asked.

“More like 500.” He said, which made her hold him tighter. He could definitely feel her racing heart against him. “I won’t drop you.”

“You can’t tell me that!” Her eyes were closed. Closed since she lifted off of the ground.

“Feel the wind, (y/n).” She opened her eyes to stare at the masked crusader. “Enjoy the moment.”

She then felt her entire body take a deep breath. She could feel the wind on her face. The push and pull of his swinging motions. The leap of gravity as they played between the earth and the sky. She started to look around and she started to laugh.

Peter had never heard a more gleeful sound in his entire life.

“Woohoo!!” She yelled as they swung through the burough. “This is awesome!”

Peter watched where he was going most of all, but when he knew the next placement of his web, he watched her. Watched the fear fly away with the wind in her hair. He grinned at every yelp she made, every cheer. Her eyes were shining and sparkling in the light of the evening sun.

When they reached their destination, which was just around the corner from the high school, he set her down. Her legs were like jelly as she took a step. He caught her softly in his arms before she stumbled forward. This time she wasn’t afraid of his touch. She leaned into him. He could tell she could feel his warmth. His body. She wrapped her arms around him and held him. He didn’t know what to do for a second but when he wrapped his arms around her, it was like a glow covered them in their embrace.

Peter couldn’t tell if it had been a minute or ten that she held him. And she was really holding him.

“Thank you for saving me.” (Y/n) said as she pulled out of the hug. She put a large step between them. Brushed a piece of hair behind her head, and looked at the ground by his feet. “I guess I’ll see you around.”

“Yeah…” Peter said dreamily. Until he realized who he was at the moment. He straightened up and started to chuckle with a hand on the back of his neck. “Well citizen, I’ll leave you to your day.”

“Right…” she started as though to walk away but turned quickly back to him. He tensed before she stopped right in front of him and kissed him on his clothed cheek. “Thanks again, Spider-Man.”

“Oh yeah. Yeah. Don’t mention it. Haha…” he had never been more thankful for his mask in his life as he knew he had probably never had his face this red before. “Bye.”

“Bye.” She said, pulling out her phone to make a call. Probably to her parents. Or a taxi. Or the cops.

All Peter knew were the butterflies in his stomach and how he couldn’t wait until Wednesday to see (y/n) again. He was going to ask if she wanted to go to Flash’s party with her. And he hoped more than anything that she would say yes.

[eric-the-bmo]

Blood and Silicon ep19: A Few Stops Before We Go

[Summary: The boys prepare for the road trip to Chicago. Blake has a Moment, while Percy and Leo talk about religion and later fail with impulsivity.] @kentuckycaverats @sanguineasylum @zwoelffarben

CW: Self-harm, brief discussion of suicide (in terms of faking one's death) [yes ik this is a horror game, but im still putting those warnings here] ----

It's around 10:30pm; Blake asks Harrison for an extension of the trip, since Leo might need a while to process and grieve. He bargains for the extension to be a week, since he's had a wild month, and Harrison calls Leo over- Leo, who was busy writing in his notebook for planning what to bring on the trip, walks over, and they ask for his opinion. He agrees it's for the best (though in all honesty, he wouldn't have thought to ask for it by himself). Harrison says Leo's been trying hard; Just get it over with, then have a week to recuperate on the city outskirts. It's not good to linger in Chicago- don't come back there or deal with your mortal family once this is over.

They then discuss the way to fake his death via car crash. ["Well," Leo says. "Considering I have no experience faking my own death, I might need some assistance."] Both Blake and Percy aren't the most experienced with that though (Blake had simply gone missing), and they talk about getting a body double. Leo reveals he's got an eye tattoo on the back of his neck, and it turns out Blake knows some tattoo artists in Chicago (he might also be able to get into contact with someone who can help. Harrison asks if Leo had any issues in life others might know about- Leo admits he had gotten out of a bad relationship and can be kind of impulsive, so they settle on faking a suicide where he drives his car off into the water.

Circling back to the previous topic, Harrison says if they can't figure out how to get a body double in time... he gives them a number to call as a last resort, but if they call it the Camarilla might figure out they're there. Leo's expression changes as he realizes The Camarilla?? Runs his home city???? He takes out a cigarette.

Harrison drives off and Blake and Leo head over to Pauline to update her; she's not going with us, so we exchange goodbyes and "please be safe"s. She tells Leo that faking his death will be for the best, and that she and Blake will be there for him. They part ways; Leo makes a "see you next year" joke.

Blake calls a tired Wes and asks him to get a new phone for him, in the guise of him pretending to need to get a phone for a friend's Christmas gift. Wes agrees. Then Blake breaks his phone due to the whole "Hunters can track us" thing, and calls Nelida on Percy's phone. He tells her, in code, that there's Hunters around and to lay low for a while, stay out of downtown/their territory; she's incredibly confused at first and asks if he can visit later tonight to explain.

["Probably not. I got family to visit up in the warmer area for the holidays; You know how it is." "...What the hell are you talking about."] Blake says they can talk after New Years, and she says he better have a story for him when he gets back. They hang up.

Leo texts his sister that something came up with his plane ticket, so don't worry about picking up from O'Hare, but he'll make it to Christmas dinner. He waits a bit for a response (there isn't one, she's probably asleep), then follows suit in breaking his phone- but it takes him a few tries and he doesn't look cool at all while doing it.

Blake gets his bowie knife back from Leo, and the coterie gets taken back to their places to pack and prepare. Percy pays his rent for January early, packs some things, and thinks about getting another weapon. ["I've got a collapsible hatchet or acollapsible spear you can use," Blake offers. "Oh! That's rather funny, an ancestor of mine used to use spears." Percy says. "I'd be happy to take yours off your hands for a moment."] Leo packs some things as well, notably the presents and his vampire hunting kit- Upon a comment Leo makes about it, Blake is all "stakes don't have to be high-quality, you can also just use a chair-leg" (and Leo is offered by Percy to be taught how to do so). Percy asks if Leo knows how to use a gun- he doesn't, but reasons it'd be useful to learn, so it's agreed to teach him at some point during the roadtrip.

With everyone else taken care of, the coterie is driven to Buck's garage (a touchstone of Blake's) so our resident Gangrel can pack his things. Blake tells the others to not touch anything.

["You can look, you can maybe touch- But you don't take, and you don't leave." "I am not a petty thief, Blake," Percy states, "but of course." Blake looks at Leo- The Malkavian puts his hands in his pockets.]

Blake leaves the garage, puts his bike into a side garage, and heads off into a tunnel system to go back to his haven. -----

With the two other men by themself, Leo asks Percival about the Antediluvians. He learns they're the "apex of each clan," described by an anxious Percy, such as how Caine is the apex of all of them- and Leo, being an atheist, is thrown for a loop & is a bit incredulous over the statement that Cain from The Bible is the first vampire. Percy, in his own way, is all "well hey, we're vampires. Werewolves and warlocks exist. Why not stuff from the bible?" The prayer he did earlier is tied to his belief in Caine; upon Leo asking, he learns Percy was raised Protestant. He also learns Noddism is the study of this origin belief. [Percy: "Some people believe the wildest things [about Noddist lore]." Leo, deadpan: "Yeah, they sure do."]

Leo asks for tips on how to deal with the Camarilla. Percival advises to avoid interaction, and to not buy into any promises they'll try to make. Then Percy asks that if Leo's from Chicago, why didn't he know the Camarilla were there, or even what they are- didn't his sire tell him? Leo doesn't look at him, as always, and says there just wasn't time; He had to leave quickly.

Percy asks if Jeremiah has any affiliations with the Camarilla; Leo doesn't know, & says J might not talk to Percy even if he does manage to find him. The Ventrue says it's fine if Leo is hesitant to speak about his sire- it's fine to be suspicious of others, but don't be too closed off.

["You're never going to get far in this life by yourself." "...Well," Leo shifts his weight. "I'm sure I'll have company somehow."]

With the conversation dying out, Leo digs through his pockets for cigarettes and offers one to Percy. ----

Blake finally gets to his haven, activating one of those wall-mounted singing fish that's up near the entrance- Wes is startled awake from the couch and asks when the fuck Blake got that; about a week ago, Blake responds. He receives a new phone like he requested and fills Wes in on what's going on and what happened tonight as he packs some things- Wes is concerned about the hunters, and Blake implies it's been a while since he's dealt with them and trails off for a moment. Wes also has a fun reaction to finding out the fledgling Blake works with is from Chicago (and Wes says it's nice Blake is helping Leo out with the trip). They both tell each other to stay safe. Wes asks if he needs anything else, so Blake feeds on him a little bit before leaving. He pulls up his hat and hoodie as he leaves.

As Blake heads back through the tunnels, he can't help but think too much about everything going on; things are too similar. He feels almost sick, and leans against the wall with a mind swirling with repetitive memories and thoughts ("He's not here/It doesn't matter"). He activates his fangs and bites into his right arm, hard enough to get a point of aggravated damage. There's a moment of relief; not from the act or sensation of it, but because he did what needed to be done: punishment. He patches it up with a medkit, and makes his way back to the coterie.

---

Meanwhile, Percy is telling Leo that he personally doesn't view Caine as a God like the Church of Caine does. He recounts the story of Zillah to the Malkavian, citing that if Caine was a god, he would have known to not get tricked by the Crone. He belives Caine had this story written to have his childer remember the warnings against embracing for love- which are, as Percy states, that 1) Love withers upon the Embrace, and 2) There is an intrinsic horror in the bond. Leo briefly wonders if there were other loves Caine had, omitted from texts, or if she was the only one. The conversation circles back to Antedilvians as Percy briefly tells Leo a small handful of their supposed names; Saulot and Malkav, for instance. Leo goes back to the Zillah story and asks how Percy chooses to interpret the love withering; Percy states there's an imbalance between humans and Kindred.

["You have to find your own love afterwards." He's fiddling with his ring.]

Blake returns at this point, putting a fake license plate on his car, and leaves a note for Buck. He states he's heading out of town for a bit, so he borrowed some stuff, and he puts the note where he'd be able to see it.

The coterie packs their things into the jeep; Percy gets Kyra's spear as promised, and Leo is surprisingly gifted Kyra's pocket knife. Leo thanks him, but mentions he has no knife experience; he's a bit better with his fists, though, and Percy reveals he was a fairly popular boxer back when he was alive. Leo's a tad impressed. Blake presents Leo with three carved stakes for his hunting kit, and we all get into the car.

We head to a fitness center upon Percy's request, since he's at 3 Hunger, and he asks if anyone would like to come with- he's used to feeding with a pack. Leo offers to keep watch so Blake can stay with the car; he reassures the Gangrel that they can handle it (Percy adds it's a learning experience), and exits the car. Blake pulls Percy to the side before he heads off: ["Now as far as I know, just a heads up: I don't think your types usually hunts in packs."] Percy doesn't say anything about that. ----

Leo goes invisible to follow Percy as the two men eventually get past the front desk and into the gym's locker room; Percy's brought a gym bag as part of his cover. He waits until he finds a guy that matches his preferences (and Leo is impatiently wondering why he hasn't fed yet??)- and he finally finds one. He tells Leo to keep watch, and Leo confirms he heard this by tapping his shoulder. With a bad-ish roll, Percy's future victim sees him head towards his direction. Percy, who gained an extra Hunger along the way, acts as if he's going to open a locker nearby before grabbing him and starting to feed.

Leo soon realizes Percy isn't going to stop, though, and after a few fruitless efforts to get him to stop by tapping his shoulder, he decides the next best course of action is to punch him. Percy whirls around to look at him with frenzied eyes, absolutely more Beast than himself in this moment, and a part of Leo's brain absolutely panics; with a suddenly-awful headache he decks the Ventrue across the head. He does this again and Percy finally pulls away, regains himself, and apologizes for the slight frenzy. He sets his victim down on a bench, calls 911 with the guy's phone, and halfheartedly tosses it next to him. Leo has a million thoughts a minute running through his head over this whole thing, but stays relatively quiet. ["Don't linger on your feelings." Percy's trying to make his hair less disheveled. "You don't have to talk about it to me. Talk about it to Blake if it's going to bother you." Leo makes eye contact, staring daggers at him before looking away. "Let's just get out of here, yeah? We've been in here long enough." He turns invisible to sneak back out again.] ---

Blake is hanging up a call and sees them return: Percy is disheveled, and Leo looks shaken and kinda upset. He's tapping his fingers a lot. Blake asks what happened as the two of them get in the car, and Percy says they can talk while he drives. Blake is Concerned and turns on the car, muttering how he knew he had a bad feeling about letting those two head off, but nooo, no one listens to him.

[Percy finally speaks up. "If Mr Leo isn't going to tell you," He says, "I will for the sake of transparency. My Beast took the better of me; I took a little more tha-" "Ahbupbup- I thought we were gonna talk about it on the road!!" Blake peels out of the parking lot as Don't Fear the Reaper plays from the radio. "Let's make some headway!"]

Notes/Commentary:

WAgh ty Harrison for the extra week for Leo to grieve aaaugh

Leo canonically will Only use emojis if the person he's texting also uses them. His text to his sister had a little christmas tree emoji <3

We packed so much stuff....

LEO WITH GUN LEO WITH GUN HAPPENING SOON! Surely nothing bad will happen because of this. We're gonna get a Leo training montage probably /silly

BLAKE LORE??? CRUMBS OF BLAKE LORE???

I Cannot stress enough how good the tunnel/arm moment was. His player did an AMAZING job describing it all im Obsessed

Percy mispronounces Saulot since he's only ever read it btw, that's such a nice detail

Props to Percy for quoting the Book of Nod?? hello??

Love how Leo had a knife but decided to hit Percy instead. Ultimate Panic Mode said "taking out the knife is too many steps. Punch him" /lh

The locker room scene is also making me Insane btw, yall have no idea. There was also a huge vibe dissonance bc Life is a Highway was playing in the background.

Props to Leo for actively making eye contact, lets go king

This road trip is gonna be TENSE at first lmao, leo continues to go through The Horrors <3

[jupitersreadings]

Hi lovie saw that you took requests and I was wondering if you’d write something about the boys coming home from tour or something and it’s just been long since they’ve seen each other and it’s just a cute reunion🥺

welcome home

summary; above

warnings; n/a, short, fluffy

pairing; y/n x band, y/n x luke

six months. it’s been six months since you’ve seen your best friends along with you boyfriend. they’ve been on the take me home tour and it had concluded just a week ago.

your leg bounced as you sat in the airport. people passed you, reuniting with friends and family. others running to their flight or baggage claim.

you had never been nervous before when picking up the boys but it had never been this long since seeing them. you were unable to visit all tour due to you work schedule.

both luke and you had been so busy as well that your communication fizzled out to only a good morning and good night texts along with some ‘ i love yous ‘ here and there. that’s what made you the most nervous. what if everything’s different.

you saw the mass of people making their way towards you. knowing it was the boys, it became louder around you.

then you saw him. you stood as he looked up, he looked exhausted. dark circles, a hat, baggy clothes. but his smile grew as soon as you saw him. you have him a slight wave and that’s when mike saw you too.

luke picked up the pace, excusing himself as he pushed past people until he reached you. he let go of his stuff and wrapped his arms around you. he lifted you off your feet because of his height and held you close.

“ oh my goodness i missed you so much y/n “ he whispered into your neck. he finally set you down, remembering where you were and how many people were around. turning towards mike who was the next person after luke, throwing your arms around him and making your way to ash and calum.

once all the hugs were done like made his way back right next to you. he slipped his hand into yours as you led them threw the airport to your car.

“ i’m so excited your guys are home, we have a brunch planned for tomorrow and we can all catch up but fill me in now how was everything? “ you asked opening the trunk of your car helping the guys throw their suitcases in the car. luke’s hands never left you, whether it be your waist or your hand.

“ obviously it was incredible but i’m so exhausted and so excited to see my dogs and crystal “ mike chipped in while helping with the bags.

“ brunch will be so nice because i’m sorry but i’m closing my eyes the way home “ calum spoke up and then turned to ashton “ im using you for a pillow big guy “ he laughed. you couldn’t help but smile now having them back. you shut the trunk as ashton, calum, and michael all piled into the back letting luke take the front seat.

“ i’m so happy to be back with you “ luke looked down and smiled at you once more. he leaned down and kissed your forehead and pulled you in for another hug. he held you tight and smiled as you held him back.

“ let’s go luke, time to get you guys home “ you smiled as you let go of him. he laughed slightly knowing he was gonna make you come home with him because you are his home.

[eldritchmochi]

okay so, to have a place for consolidated information for the next little bit, since i'm sure folks have QUESTIONS given my incredibly aggressive gallows humour

MOCHI, WHAT THE FUCK IS UP WITH THAT?? (guts edition)

if you got here via a link, follow this link instead for the latest update here's updates 1.5, 2.0, and 3.0 !

tldr ive been getting a number of recurrent small bowel obstructions located in my duodenum (first part of the small intestine, connecting the stomach to the rest of the bowel) due to external pressure on the duodenum around the 3rd to 4th (of 4) section. what's causing the pressure?? no clue actually ive done a bazillion scans and none of them have been quite clear enough for a real confident dx so i get to have surgery about it at some point in the near future

current theory is the pressure is from some sort of non-cancerous tumor mass and the plan is to cut me open nice and big, look about, and remove both this mass and the affected section of the duodenum (.5 of an organ) at a minimum, but may involve fully bipassing the duodenum when my guts get hooked back up to my stomach which could (would???) also require removing my gallbladder (1 and 2 organs respectively) (i'm having so much yanked out of my abdomen this summer jfc)

atm i'm still waiting for scheduling to give me a call to set things up. surgeon's estimate was 4-5 weeks from now (8/17 when he called). from that point i'll spend a week-ish in the hospital to make sure all hoses are firmly affixed, and then i'll have a month at a minimum before i'm reasonably healed and can go back to normal life

i have good insurance and the luck (????) of being incredibly ill at the best of times, so i've already hit my out of pocket max and thus this WHOLE THING even back dating to my first er visit end of june will cost a whopping 189$ that i've already paid. i also should qualify for my states paid medical leave and my wife will get a hefty chunk of change for living expenses via student loans. however, both those things won't hit until late september at the earliest

long term, im not expecting much of a financial burden, but short term we could use a hand with groceries and similar while we wait for my backpay and my wife's student loans

for venmo and paypal: i am @/sumomomochi for both and either is fine, though pp is labeled as a business account so pls mark f&f if you can

i also have this amazon wishlist ( https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/N1NSTH3JPCX2?ref_=wl_share ) that is like 90% meal replacement shakes and bulk shelf stable snacks, but also has a couple of other useful things like bathing wipes since i am unlikely to be able to shower well post surgery, pj pants for when it cools down (i went up a size with t because my ass and thighs got just so beefy and thus have one pair that fits rn lmao), and cat food for the penni (gotta keep my nurse well paid)

uuuh what else

like i said, i'm incredibly ill at the best of times so i am a champ at weathering this sort of stuff its nbd. "i'm sorry"s are not helpful, i'd much rather have people ask direct specific questions, either about my health status or things i'm doing to keep busy (ie "any new and fun things causing tummy issues?" or "hows your battle vest coming?" or "whats your fav line youve written this week?"). engagement and entertainment is Important to keep me from climbing the walls but i swear i will bite at straight sympathy

things ive been doing to keep me out of the er include: laying on my left side or stomach (The Digestion Position; helps get food past the squished part); eating a semi-liquid diet (hence ensure, jello, pudding, the like, though its important that i also eat solid food as much as is tolerated, which is such a delicate balance. this is why i cannot currently work); going on stupid little walks for my stupid digestive health (honestly the most important thing i can do, which im mad about, because it requires pants, but not only encourages guts to digest but also will help me not decondition, which i have already done a lot of :I)

things YOU can do to help (because i know *i* am a helper but also what is actually helpful??): financially with the above deets (no pressure); asks, comments, and other conversational interactions (i am absolutely chill with basically any kind of question and i dont mind dms if youd prefer privacy, just dont pedestal me i promise i am just A Dude); fanart for my fics (i do not care if you "cant draw" i will still love it); prompts for fandom but not necessarily fic projects (wardrobe moodboards/meta for characters, playlists/songs, smut writing how to questions, cosplay progress/plans qs, those "what was x's pov in this scene/what specifically happened between x and y in this fic?" qs andor other ask meme things idk dude i haven't been able to do shit for almost three months im booooored)

in conclusion

nurse penni says do not worry about herb patient, he is in good hands, just be sure to offer regular enrichment

[blazescompendium]

Shin Megami Tensei is 31 years old today.

image provided by Vesk Scans. Please follow her archiving work!

Yeah, Shin Megami Tensei for the Super Famicom is now 31 years old. It is surprising for me how a game that came out full 6 years before i even give my first breath on this Earth, would be so important for me and my life. But here we are.

Even after playing the entirety of the mainline franchise, and a lot of spin offs, this game still holds its position very well in my heart because it is such a unique game. First, i always loved mythology and religion, so much so that i pursued it as a career. It started when i was little, with the influence of my father who was a scholar (albeit amateur) of those fields. Religion always played a major role in my life, both for the good and the bad, and although i don't actually align with any religion at the moment, i was studying the bible in a religious school since a very early age.

So, when i found out about Shin Megami Tensei, it clicked really, really well with me. I know that it is just a game, and even if it tries a lot to be faithful, as a researcher and scholar of Mythology and Religion we got to say it not always gets it right. But it tries! And when it tries, it can achieve very good results, and that's why i love it so much.

And that was when i was a teen/young adult. Now i grew up a lot, and even started my career in those fields, and still regard this game very high.

The characters are great for me, because i love how this game can be incredibly inclusive. Your main character is not a destined hero, or magical being. It is just an average guy, going to the groceries when the world start to end. He lives with his mom, have its problematic friends, and lives an average life. He always acts like any other person would act, and even his looks are just average.

Now, the thing is that this game did not aged well, but its absolutely playable and very fun to play. The old SMT titles have this ''survival horror'' energy, where you have to take care of resources while advancing in the game. ''Should you use your complete party in this dungeon, since its dangerous, but risk to deplete your MAG stock?'' Stuff like that got me.

And this brings me to how much i hate Atlus as a capitalist company. They made this effort to show us they care about the anniversary of the franchise that kick-started their business, but did not do anything about it. Just shoved merch to the US audience, that is not available anywhere else. Us, from outside, just did not got anything from this ''anniversary''. And i thought the Persona 25th was bad enough lol. But i guess merch hoarders are happy?

And that was a big fucking lie

I honestly don't want anything out of the ordinary. If they could at least port the SNES titles to the Switch Online at the west, because its already available in Japan, i beleive we would be very grateful already. Playing and presenting this games for a new generation is a pain. And i believe Shin Megami Tensei deserves it as a series, not only for its uniqueness but also for everything this IP did to Atlus.

But hey, i guess we are getting something, right? We have a whole new Persona 5 spin off coming next week! I am so hyped to see the same characters, exactly as they were 7 years ago, in another story about teen rebellion or whatever.

Im sorry, SMT. We failed with you. But your legacy will never be gone. I beleive SMT message keeps relevant to this day, and even more so as the time passes by. The world is a very different place then it was in 199X, but still a very divided and extremist place. SMT was the only game of its time to tackle this issues.

Happy anniversary to Shin Megami Tense, as a great game as one of my favorite games of all time. I wish more people could play it at least once!

And yeah, to celebrate i think i will be beating SMT 2 tonight, after lectures!

[threehuskiesinatrenchcoat]

GUESS WHO‘S BACK! BACK AGAIN! i never rly left but let’s ignore that

I‘ve got an order for a uuuuuh dead bird soulmate au! Anyone order a soulmate au? No? Well shit, it’s here now and I‘m not taking it back.

There‘re honestly so many possibilities with soulmate aus and I love them to bits! Also, there doesn’t exist one for them yet? Couldn’t let that stand. So this one is based on "whatever u write on your skin shows up on your soulmate‘s skin as well" and as tradition demands it, I shall send it to u first! afterwards ao3 obviously lmao also enjoy!! loved talking about this with u

Alejandro slowly rolled his sleeve up. Another little note had appeared while they were busting a cartel house, the slight tingle of the letters being written alerting him to it. By now he knew how to not let himself get distracted by it, but he had been looking forward to reading the message for the rest of the mission. The script was slightly loopy with letters smashed together the faster his soulmate wrote.

He traced the lines on his arm, taking his time reading the message. It was just a simple update on life, some annoying employer demanding they compensate him for a job they weren’t at fault for botching. He’d be incredibly busy the next few weeks. Alejandro smiled ruefully and picked up a pen, choosing his words carefully. They were both right handed, so their left arm got a bit crowded at times, but after an incident with a note being written on his leg, making Phillip stumble and fall into a creek when they were younger, they agreed to limit themselves to their arms.

At times he mourned the distance between them, his soulmate being American wasn’t as bad compared to some he knew were continents apart, but being in the Mexican Special Forces made his life and job too dangerous to actually be together. He wouldn’t give up this city, as much as he wanted to meet soulmate.

It was a sore subject between them. Both of them knew the dangers of their work, but Alejandro was willing to die for Las Almas and Phillip definitely didn’t agree on that. The colonel had no delusions about his fate, but sometimes he liked to imagine a future where they both retired together. They could move into his family’s old farmhouse, maybe get some animals like chicken and a dog, waking up in each other’s arms.

When the tank blew up, Alejandro felt as if his heart broke into a million pieces. It hadn’t taken long for him to figure out that Phillip Graves was his Phillip, his soulmate. He thought he‘d be able to tell him after the mission, when everything was over and done. He should’ve known nothing would go as planned, but now, watching his vaqueros putting out the fire still roaring through the metal cage that had once been a tank, surrounded by smoke and stinking of gasoline, he regretted it.

The darkness around him felt almost oppressing. He tossed and turned in bed, thinking about what ifs and should haves. His arm felt weird, a slight tingle on the inside of his arm. Shooting up straight, he fumbled to turn on the lamp on his nightstand and held his arm towards the light. There, shortly under the inside of his elbow, two words were written in loopy handwriting, letters pressed together: "I‘m sorry."

i cannot even begin to explain how much i love you rn im screaming crying throwing up rolling on the floor foaming at the mouth im

i love love love the ending so much and the subtle specifics about his handwriting that tie it in with the beginning

also the mental image of phil landing face first into a creek makes me chuckle. alejandro fucking his shit up ever since they were young

graves complaining about his job i see what you did there 😌

[acesofspadess]

Live{4}

pairing; Niall Horan x black!OC/reader (reader has a name, but read in second person)

summary: after a silly little comment on Niall's live, who would've thought it bring you...well here....

a/n: Listen

media.tenor.com

You looked at Niall who was just staring at you silently. He got up from his seat and walked out of the room.

You and Niall- well lets say you werent even sure what that was. His attempt at gaining you back seemed to be on and off. He would send you small bouquets of flowers everyday for the week leading up to when you saw him next, but would never talk to you outside of zoom calls. 

You knew he would be busy with other artists and the new album, but you still werent sure how to feel. 

You were going Jerome who you had grown close with over rehearsals and zoom calls now that you were on Team Niall. You were the closest to Ryley-Tate as you two were the youngest on the team and gravitated towards each other.

You walked in with Jerome next to you and you stopped moving as you saw who was sitting next to Niall. “Look at Maia, she nearly died.” you laughed at Nialls words behind your hand as you started to walk again. 

You switched places with Jerome when he was done and you hugged him as he sounded incredible. “Have you gotten over the fact that this lady is here yet?” Niall teased and you rubbed your eye with your middle finger and he laughed. “No I'm not, thank you for reminding me.”

“I'll be singing ‘Skinny love’ by Birdy.” you told them and you watched Reba ‘wow’. 

For me, this song holds a deep meaning in my heart. I went through a heartbreak that I wished I could just go back and time and hold onto a little longer. Sorry, i don't wanna cry.” you laughed looking up.

When you finished your first run through it was silent and you hid your face behind your hands. “Oh no.” you whispered but the mic picked it up. “Oh my gosh.” Reba whispered as to not break the atmosphere in the room. “I have never received a song in such a powerful way than I have just now.” you looked at her with wide eyes and she laughed.

“There isn’t anything I can say to that.” she added on. You looked at Niall who was just staring at you silently. He got up from his seat and walked out of the room. You all looked around before he came back in with a box of tissues and you all laughed.

“You can’t do that to me.” you scolded as he came back to his seat. “I-” he paused looking for something to say. “There is nothing I can say to that.” you pouted softly at his words. “Now that is the definition of speechless.”

``````````

“Go maia!” you heard Riley scream from the playoff balcony. You shook your head softly with a smile and looked up to see Niall with a small smile at the interaction.

“Now singing Skinny Love, here's Maia Quinn.”

Eyes now closed you sang with your heart,

Come on, skinny love, just last the year

“M, im telling you im gonna be there when you release your EP i promise”

Pour a little salt, we were never here

“No A, he hasnt responded in months… im not waiting any longer”

My, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my Staring at the sink of blood and crushed veneer Tell my love to wreck it all Cut out all the ropes and let me fall

“I know you wish he was here.”

“But hes not.”

My, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my Right at the moment, this order's tall

“M, please, i know it's been a year since the live but you can’t sit in your room all day”

And I told you to be patient And I told you to be fine And I told you to be balanced And I told you to be kind And in the morning, I'll be with you But it will be a different kind 'Cause I'll be holding all the tickets And you'll be owning all the fines Who will love you?

“Maia, you know you love him. So why are you with me?”

Who will fight?

“I know what he did Atticus, trust im the last person you need to remind;  but i'm still going to support his music.”

And who will fall far behind?

“He’s moved on, now its your turn.”

Come on skinny love Oh,oh

As you vocalised you closed your eyes finally let out everything you had been feeling and turned it into vocal power, giving yourself chills

My, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my My, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my

My, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my My, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my

As you faded off the last riff you quickly wiped the fallen tear as the lights went dark, before they all turned back on and you heard the audience cheer as Jerome came up to you and gave you a hug.

“I think you both gave amazing performances,” Chance started. “To me Maia kinda edged it out because I could tell you felt that song. If I had to advise my homie Niall, I'd say Maia.” you thanked him as you looked at Niall who still had his head in his hands. 

“I loved both performances, but damn Maia, you brought tears to my eyes. I am feeling the sting of letting you go.” you laughed and thanked her as Blake spoke up next. “The difference for me I think is Jerome, for me it felt like you were putting together versus Maia came right out singing this song like she wrote it, so for that I'd lean towards Maia.”

“Alright Niall before you tell us who the winner is let's hear some thoughts.” Carson led on.

When everyone looked at Niall, he had his hand tight rubbing over his mouth, with red glistening eyes. “Niall are you crying?” Kelly gasped looking over Chance. You watched him laugh before taking a shaky deep breath. “These decisions that I have to make every time never get easier. Jerome, I really thought you put everything into it. You did get pitchy in the first verse, which is usually where you're very strong, and I think that knocked your confidence. But you are an incredible singer no doubt about it.” you clapped for him and rubbed his arm comfortingly.

“Maia, that was unbelievable. In rehearsals, you didn't tell us why you chose the song, but you didn't need to. This performance had your soul in it.”

“Alright Niall, who is the winner of this knockout?”

He took a deep breath before looking up, “the winner of this knockout is Maia.”

You looked down softly before turning and hugging Jerome. You walked down the steps and hugged Niall. This hug was different. You had never hugged anybody like this before. “I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.” Niall whispered as you felt tears wet the top of your head. You let go of him and dragged your thumbs across his cheeks to wipe the tears before walking away waving to Kelly who waved at you.

The night the episode came out Niall was sitting in his bed after watching the episode. He had cried all over again after hearing your ‘monologue’ clips.  He heard his phone buzz against his chest and looked at the notification. It was from Lewis and he was in a different time zone and should've been asleep.

You really fucked up

And didnt he know it

[navstuffs]

I love your Rob fics so much, you’re a very good writer! Could I request a rob x f!reader, where they get into a fight over something, choose for yourself, and reader leaves and Rob thinks it’s all over but he finds her and it ends with them making up and fluff?

The Distance that tears us apart

Pairing: Robert Pattinson x Female!Reader

Summary: When (Y/N) and Robert's vacation time gets shortened, (Y/N) might just have reached her limit.

Warning: angst with a happy ending

Authors note: first of all, i'm very sorry for taking so long to write this! i had some mental health issues and wasn't in the mood to write so now im coming back slowly and i plan on finishing all my requests (not in the order they were sent, for which i DEEPLY apologize :/). making out scene on this fanfic isn't my best one to which i apologize. thank you so much for your nice words as well, thank you so MUCH for your patience! <3 i hope you enjoy this fanfic! gif credit to the owner

(Y/N) was upset. At the world, at Robert Pattinson, at herself. She knew dating a famous actor would be complicated, but Robert made sure she was feeling comfortable, happy, and safe.

She had been feeling even more lonely in their house for the last months due to Robert's busy schedule, except for some usual long video calls and texts, when he could. (Y/N) tried to busy herself with work, projects, and whatever she could until their next time together. They were going to pass two full weeks together, on a trip (Y/N) had planned. Robert had to put his foot down for that to happen. His team insisted on him taking one more project but he knew his girlfriend needed him. Robert missed her as much as she missed him. Or even more.

Then, on his first day back home, Robert gets a call: an incredible chance to work with some big-name director that he had wanted for so long. His initial reaction was not to accept it, but (Y/N) knew how much he had wanted to work with this director, so she told him to go. Robert asked a hundred times if she was sure to which she grabbed his face into her hands, making him stare right into her decided's eyes.

"I am sure."

"But, (Y/N)..."

"Since I started dating you Rob, you told me how lucky you would be to get to work with this man! And he finally did it! You have to go there and at least listen to what he has to say!"

Robert apologized a hundred times, promising he would make it up for the lost time, again. (Y/N) thought she was happy for him, she knew he wanted to go.

So their two weeks got cut short to exactly five days - that Robert had to fight really hard for the last and fifth day since his team wanted him to give only four ("You know how those directors are Robert, but he is willing to wait for you.")

Bye, ten amazing days in Amsterdam, full of activities, a trip (Y/N) planned for at least one year ago? Or maybe it was even more? It was just like when it came time to their Egypt travel and oh the Switzerland one. Robert still insisted on her going, to invite a friend, and have fun, distract herself, but for what reason? Her friends had jobs, no one could just simply just let everything go, and she had a job as well! (Y/N) had luckily gotten fourteen days off to spend with her boyfriend, a nicely deserved vacation that was now ruined.

It wasn't the first time something like this would happen and probably wouldn't be their last and (Y/N) knew. She knew what was at stake when she started dating a famous actor like Robert Pattinson. Her friends and family warned her.

All the other times Rob had left her for something else, she told herself it didn't bother her, she was happy for him, but she missed the quality time they had before. It seemed so distant now.

So they tried to do something exciting on those five days. Meals out (including tea time), a painting class, a pottery class. Riding bikes and hiking across London's parks. (Y/N) tried to ignore how fast the week was passing but it was hard to miss. And she knew because of that she wasn't enjoying any activity. Robert noticed but every time he would ask, she would murmur she was fine. They were fine. Everything was fine.

So by Saturday morning, (Y/N) frustration had reached its peak. She woke up annoyed and things didn't get better when she tried to make breakfast for them and ended up burning eggs two times. She threw the pan at the sink full of rage, making Robert rush to the kitchen.

"(Y/N)?"

"I was trying to make breakfast." (Y/N) stated low, her voice trembling with anger.

"It is okay, we can go out and-"

"Again? And do what, Robert? Pretend this isn't happening at all? You leave tomorrow and your girlfriend couldn't fix one single decent breakfast?" (Y/N) snarked.

"(Y/N), please..."

"Please what, Robert? Do you know how much I miss you? How that bed is large and cold without you?"

"You know I miss you, too! I miss you every day I am away! I asked if you wanted me to go and you said I could!" He argued back, nervously passing his hand through his hair.

"And what was I supposed to say? No Robert, don't go! Lose the opportunity of a lifetime, that you have wanted so long for a vacation I have planned for I don't know how long, like many others that got canceled before!" (Y/N) half-yelled her frustration, feeling her body shake.

"I would have done it for you!" Robert insisted, trying to get close to her. (Y/N) gave two steps away from him, shaking her head "My life isn't only about movies and glamorous red carpets, it involves you! My life with you is the most important thing I have!"

"Are you sure? Because for the last couple of years that we have dated, I barely see you! We barely spend time together!"

Robert seemed frozen on his spot, his heart beating fast again his chest, his palms itching to run his finger through his hair, again. He was hurt, hurt for (Y/N). He always tried to make sure to show how important (Y/N) was to him, but it clearly wasn't enough.

"(Y/N), I can call and cancel this meeting right now! We will go anywhere you want for as long as you want!" Robert started pleading, watching as (Y/N) shook her head even more furious.

"It is not about that! I am tired of being lonely, I am tired of not being enough time with my boyfriend! I knew it was going to be bad, but this is too much!" (Y/N) confessed, tears on the corner of her eyes now, breaking Robert's heart. His mind was racing to hold her and tell her everything was going to be okay.

There was a moment of silence, where (Y/N) stared off at everywhere except him. It surprised her how much she was actually hurting now she finally let her feelings out. All the times she was left waiting, all the times they had to cancel something. Robert's eyes were focused on her and he ended up making the question before he could stop himself, his voice cracking.

"(Y/N), do you want to...break up?"

(Y/N) looked at Rob like he had slapped her. Her head gave a full spin, her mind going too fast for her to follow. She didn't want that, did she? (Y/N) loved Robert and Robert loved (Y/N). She was sure of that. But did her love support too much? Were they at the end?

"I-I...I don't know..." (Y/N) didn't form a sentence. She sprinted away towards the back door to their garden.

The garden always helped her think better anyway.

-x-

Robert didn't immediately follow her. He knew (Y/N) needed some time to cool off. He also needed that time, to clear his mind.

He sat at a chair in their kitchen, blood rushing in his ears. He shouldn't lose control of himself right now, he couldn't break down crying right now, not before listening and talking to (Y/N). Hearing her decision. It was a mistake to have not insisted more during those days, to make sure she was really okay. Robert was disappointed in himself: how much she had been suffering like this? How much he didn't know?

Rob gave (Y/N) at least twenty minutes before following her into the garden. It was her favorite part of the house and if she could stay out there the whole day, she would. Rob remembered one of the first things when they moved into the house was a romantic dinner out under the stars, taking the table outside and all the chairs. (Y/N) also loved watching the storm when it rained and sometimes Robert had to drag her back in so she didn't catch a cold.

Decided, Robert got up from his chair. If he was about to lose her, he would at least fight for (Y/N). He could only hope he had a chance.

-x-

Robert knew exactly where to look for (Y/N) in their garden. Her favorite spot was under a big tree, one that offered enough shade so she could sit down to read without getting too much sun on her eyes. He found (Y/N) laying down in the grass, not crying, simply staring at the clouds. Robert's first instinct was to want to hold her and they both could cuddle right there, as they did so many times before. Instead, he stayed standing at a safe distance from her, hands on his pockets from touching his hair even more. It probably looked a mess already.

"Can I join you?"

(Y/N) nodded, her eyes still focused on the sky. Robert gave a fast look at the sky: it was a beautiful day, with some clouds and a sunny sky. It didn't seem it was going to rain, which was a miracle. It wasn't too warm as well. Perfect weather. Robert sat down near (Y/N), her right hand just a few inches away from his. There was only silence for a few moments until Robert shared:

"(Y/N), I am sorry. I didn't know how much you were suffering. You should have told me. I didn't know you were feeling this bad, love."

(Y/N) sniffed, biting her lips, her eyes still directed at the sky. She would have told him if she knew; she didn't know she was feeling this bad. She tried to ignore most of her bad feelings to not make both of them upset. (Y/N) tried to demonstrate she was fine and she was strong, but she was just lying to herself.

"You should have also told me, (Y/N). I apologize for not noticing."

"I didn't know." (Y/N) confessed, looking at him, her voice low with sadness. That made Robert even more miserable and unhappy with himself. "I didn't know I was feeling that bad, Rob. I thought I was fine, I thought I was okay but it seems I wasn't really."

Robert sighed, passing his hands on his already messy hair, paying close attention to her. His body was tense, his hands closed but he was going to listen until the very end.

"About that question in the kitchen, (Y/N), I am sorry. I think I just panicked." He admitted, ashamed of himself.

"I know. I think we are both upset and said some stuff we meant it in a really bad way." (Y/N) rose to sit in front of Robert "I don't want to break up with you if that is what you wondering."

A huge weight was lifted from Robert's shoulders. He pulled (Y/N) gently into a hug, breathing deeply. She didn't want to break up with him. (Y/N) broke their embrace, cupping his face with both her hands.

"Things have to change, Robert. I know we have jobs and yours has some pretty crazy schedules, but we need to try."

"Yes." His voice broke and Robert cleaned the wetness on his eyes.

"We could try to spend more time together and our vacations together could be mandatory? No bugging from anyone, no one really, just you and me."

"I will talk with my team about this. If I need to lay down rules and take a year off, I will. I won't lose you, (Y/N)."

(Y/N) tried to smile, locking their foreheads against each other. They stayed in there for a few moments, listening to each other's breathing. Robert passed his arm over her waist, pulling her closer to his chest. They locked lips, a little more desperate from Robert's side. He wasn't losing her. She was all his. Robert's body was lowered down into the grass with (Y/N) on top of him, his hands rubbing her back. The kiss deepened, both of their bodies warming up with the love one fell from each other. (Y/N) broke the kiss, earning a protesting moan from Robert. She giggled teasing, hiding her face in his chest. Slowly, they both calmed down.

"I will do better for us. But you got to tell me when you aren't feeling well, love. Deal?"

"Deal, Rob."

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