#It actually arrived ages ago but I forgot to post it. BUT I WANNA POST IT BECAUSE IT'S AMAZING AND I LOVE IT.

[ellieswhoreeee]

The Two of Us. pt 1

Author’s Note: This is my first time writing and Ellie fic and actually posting it, so i hope anyone who reads it likes it.! I can’t stop writing about her omg. Anyways, enjoy!

Endgame Pairings: Ellie x Fem! Reader

Warnings: Violence, marijuana, swearing, ect.

——————————————————————

You were in love with Ellie fucking Williams.

It started off as a small crush. Smaller than a grain of sand- it represented the growing interest of the green eyed girl. But like a seed, and with time, it started to grow into something more.

The interest started when she came back to Jackson. It happened when you just turned 15, she arrived on the day of your birthday- it was the second time she arrived in Jackson— but this time it was to stay.

Your birthday was nothing special, especially when you had no one to spend it with. You were an orphan and staying in one of the dorm houses with some other orphans. That day you had chores to finish, one involved the horses in the stables.

Despite being so young, you were even fully capable of handling infected. But the adults(aka Maria) wouldn’t let you out of the gates without proper training. So you were stuck with barn chores. That morning was filled with cleaning and handling most of the horses.

Tommy had walked into the stables when you were feeding your favourite horse, Gemini. You loved the spots on his body, he even had a heart shaped spot close to his eye. The rest of the spots loosely filled his simple brown and white colour palette. He was a beautiful horse.

And you were pretty sure he was pretty fond of you too. It almost seemed that he liked your company, and when you left he would get pretty upset. Making noises, and the stomping his feet in his paddock was a clear indication of that.

You noticed that he was one of three horses that weren’t being used for patrol- in other words they weren’t cleared to being used. Not until they were trained properly. He would mostly be in his pen, all alone. So, you and him bonded on being alone.

You had a connection with the horse.

Tommy had noticed this- because of of course he notices everything when it comes to you. He was the one who found you and brought you back to Jackson. He was your father figure. He and Maria take care of you whenever they could, but lately they had been busy.

So, you had assumed that he just forgot your birthday and was just checking up on you. But you were very wrong. Actually, his sentence had caught you off guard. “Saddle up, we’re going on patrol. I want to introduce you to my brother and his kid.” He had placed his hand on your shoulder with a small smile on his face.

You raised your eyebrows at the older man, staring at him like he was going insane. “But i’m not cleared for patrol. Too young, remember?”

He removed his hand from your shoulder, and it went straight to his beard- almost as if to show you what he was thinking blatantly. “Too young? I could’ve sworn today was your birthday. Which means- you’re old enough to go on a group patrol, ain’t that right?” You hugged him tightly, thanking him a million times before quickly moving to get one of the cleared horses but again he stopped you. “Take gemini. We’ll be waiting for you by the gate.”

You grinned at Gemini, and he looked back at you- almost as if he was grinning too.

You ran like hell to get back to your house(which was close to the stables), grabbing your bag and bow(and arrows), and clipped your holster with your knife to your side and ran back quickly. One of the adults, Eric, helped with Gemini while you were away. After Gemini was saddled up, you grabbed his reins and walked towards the gate. Tommy, Maria and two new people were by the gate. Jack and Derek were close by holding onto 2 horses.

Tommy looked up, watching as you walk closer and closer to them. “That was fast, must be pretty eager, huh?”

You nodded happily, staying close by to Gemini as Tommy whispered something to the new man. He looked down at the red headed girl beside him who was keeping her eyes on the floor. He nudged the girl, making her move closer to you. You noticed, finally decided to look at the girl fully.

She was so pretty.

“Crap,” You whispered under your breath at the sight of her- feeling slightly intimidated by her. Luckily she didn’t hear that or she wouldn’t get the wrong idea. You didn’t mean it in a bad way. You meant it in more of a ‘holy crap she’s beautiful’.

You snapped out of it, removing your left hand from Gemini’s reins. You held out your hand for her to take. “Names Y/n, nice to meet you new girl.” You sounded more confident than you were. It your voice had cracked once you would’ve given up on talking again.

She finally looked up, nodding awkwardly. She takes your hand and shakes. “Ellie. It’s cool to meet you too.”

You both pulled away after some time, and looking over at Joel and Tommy. Joel introduced himself. They continued to talk while you and Ellie kept to yourself.

You laughed when Gemini started to chew on your clothes. You noticed Ellie watching you- but as seen as you made eye contact she looked away. “New girl,” You called out, grabbing her attention once again. “You wanna pet him? I promise he won’t eat your clothes.”

She cracked a small smile, moving towards you. “He could have it. I need a new wardrobe anyways,” She joked, slowly petting him. Gemini seemed to love the attention, seeing that he let Ellie close to him.

“So… How do you know Tommy?” You asked curiously. You wanted to get to know her more.

“Joel is his brother. We were here a couple months ago on a mission basically… But, uh, things didn’t go as plan and now we’re back.” She let out a breath after replying to you, her face changed slightly, almost as if she was disappointed. Her face changed once again into something indifferent. She turns to you. “How do you know him?”

“Oh,” You were caught off guard by her question, but decided to answer. You swallowed the lump in your throat. “He kinda saved me. If i’m being honest, i don’t remember much… amnesia or something..? but yeah, he saved me and brought me back here.”

She nodded. You two talked a little more- about the smallest and random things. It was nice talking to someone new. It was like she actually seemed interested in you. And deep down, you knew the feeling was mutual. Tommy, Maria and Joel finally finished their conversation and looked over at you two.

“Okay, girls. You ready?” Tommy asked and you two nodded. “We need some ground rules though.”

Joel was the one to speak next, his voice was gruff but held meaning. “Stay close, which means no running off.” He continued naming off rules that you two had to follow. After naming the last two rules he was done. Jack and Derek passed the reins of the horses to tommy and Joel. “Come on, baby girl. You’re with me.”

Ellie nodded, and moved towards Joel. She looked back at you, almost as if she was telling you something. She looked at you and then Gemini- which you understood. So, before it was too late you decided to speak up. “She can ride with me!” Joel and Tommy look at you- tommy seemed more surprised. “Gemini and I wouldn’t mind.”

Joel and Tommy look at each other before Joel slowly nodded. “Alright. You two watch each other’s backs. No splitting up.” You and Ellie nodded before smiling at each other.

You climbed onto Gemini, settling yourself on his saddle. You looked down at at Ellie and held out your hand for her. “Ready?” Her green eyes trailed from your eyes to your hand.

“Always.”

And from that day, you two had grown close.

Your feelings grew into something more- something special. But now things are different. You had feelings for Ellie but she didn’t feel the same. It was clear to you because she had a girlfriend. At the age of 17, Ellie started to go out with Cat.

Since that day, you’ve been crushed. But never showed it. You were great at hiding your feelings, but you’re not sure for how long you could take it for.

It was starting to eat you alive

[mvrtaiswriting]

Your writing is so beautifully done! I feel like you really capture your characters’ personalities. Would you consider writing a scenario where reader was part of the Crusaders and is reconnecting with part4!Jotaro after his recent divorce. It’s awkward dating at first, but Joot’s heart melts every time he sees reader and Jolyne getting along so well.

Are you even real? - Jotaro Kujo.

HELLO HELLO HELLO and thank you so much for waiting so long! Writer’s block has been a pain BUT this one actually carried me away and helped me get through it.. so thank you for requesting it! Gotta say it: timeline of jojo’s event is not accurate, but it does include everything you asked for!! I don’t wanna bother you anymore so please enjoy! I hope this meets your expectations!! 

Neutral reader x Jotaro Kujoh.

Jojo’s bizzare adventures: Diamond Is Unbreakable & Stardust Crusaders

Timeline of Jojo’s events (mostly jotaro’s fatherhood) is a bit bizzare

SFW

Trigger warning: usual jojo’s violence

Words Count: 2631

Song suggestion: Are you even real? by James Blake

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© bearing in mind everything I post/write is my intellectual property so please don’t steal/copy and paste and post it as yours.

Jotaro was about to throw what would have been his last punch to Kira when he was interrupted by the manifestation of a familiar stand. Was he hallucinating? Did he lose too much blood to imagine things now? While he asked himself this questions, resting his back against the wall trying to preserve the few energies he had left in his body, he looked around looking for the owner of the stand that just came to his rescue. His eyes scanned meticulously the area; he was sure you weren’t far – of course, if all of it just wasn’t a massive joke made by his tired mind.

But you were there – you were really there. And you were beating up Kira so bad, making it look so easy. He widened his eyes open, forcing himself to remain conscious. Josuke would have arrived in matters of minutes and he would have cured all of his injuries.

Jotaro closed his eyes, and the next thing he saw was you and Josuke leaning over him. You smiled when you noticed he was regained energy and health, looking into his beautiful aquamarine eyes for some seconds. You really missed them, you missed him.

“Getting old?” you said laughing, offering him a hand to help him stand up. He shook his head while a soft, almost imperceptible smile formed on his lips as he fixed his hat onto his head as per usual.

“What are you doing here?” he said, opening his arms and implicitly inviting you into a hug.

You smiled, hugging him tight. You guys hadn’t seen each other in so long, and being in each other’s arms just felt like coming home.

“Guess this is your way to say ‘thank you for saving my ass, nice to see you again!’” you said laughing.

Behind you, Josuke’s and his friends’ all had riddled expressions on their faces. Seeing Jotaro so outgoing surely was something unexpected – so much that Kira running away didn’t seem to matter at all.

Jotaro nodded at your words, breaking up from the hug and taking a good minute to look at you. He still was much taller than you, and you didn’t seem to have aged a bit. You were as beautiful as he remembered you. What he didn’t remember was all the complicated, little emotions he felt every time he was next to you that were now coming back to surface. You always held a special place in his heart. You two always shared a particular bond that never got the chance to really develop. During the crusaders days, you were too busy fighting and looking for Dio to get involved into emotional relationships; and following the final battle, after losing Kakyion, Avdol and Iggy, Jotaro didn’t think it was appropriate to actually confess you his feelings. All of you were mourning the deaths of your companions, and although Kakyion would have encouraged Jotaro to actually tell you about how he felt, in that moment, it just didn’t feel right. So he let you go, and everyone just returned to their own lives. He had moved on since then or at least he tried to do so; he was now a father with a failed marriage, but he never really forgot you. Afterall, no one ever forgets their first love.

“Joseph called me a week ago. I’m sorry I came late but it was the best I could do!” You answered Jotaro’s previous question. “He told me you guys needed a hand and that my degree in criminology would have been useful. He explained everything to me and.. here I am!” you continued.

Jotaro’s expression seemed surprised. He didn’t know his grandfather was still in contact with you. At first, he started to ask himself why didn’t Joseph tell him years before. He could have had a chance with you – he would have followed you wherever you were. His jiji knew what he felt towards you, how could he just stay silent? Those questions were quickly followed by doubts: what was Joseph planning? Did he call you because they really needed you there or because he was just trying to help Jotaro overcome his divorce and find someone to help him with Jolyne? All these doubts clouded Jotaro’s mind, leaving him silent.

After you were introduced to everyone, you and the rest of the guys went to a coffee bar to discuss how  investigations would have been organised and what methods would have been more successful in finding Kira’s new identity.

Jotaro kept his eyes locked on you while you professionally explained to Rohan, Koichi and the rest of the boys what to do. A part of him was busy studying every little detail of your face. How you still did the same facial expression you did 10 years before, how your smile still managed to lighten up everything around you. It was so strange how much time passed by, how many things changed during these years; yet  things stayed the same between the two of you. He still felt the same way he did when he was just a boy, you guys still related to each other the same way you did when you travelled around the world.

Jotaro’s posture was much more relaxed now that you were around. His face had a more relaxed expression, and you gladly found out that he became a bit more talkative than he was in his younger days.

Joseph found you a room in the same Hotel where him and Jotaro where staying in while in Morio-cho, leading the two of you to spend an incredible amount of time together.

As time passed, you and Jotaro grew closer and closer. You quickly learned about his love life and that he became a marine biologist, something you would have never expected from him. He was very curious about your life too: he was eager to know what happened to you during those years – he wasn’t able to find you when he tried, and now that you were right in front of him, he wanted to make the best out of the time he got to spend with you. He wanted to know if the person he always loved was taken, and what happened to them during all that time. However, he never directly asked you any private question. He learned that you had an important relationship at a certain point, which broke your heart and made you afraid of love, but only because you and Joseph talked about it.

He thought it was ironic; he had a similar experience.

Searching for Kira’s new identity was tiring. You were all doing your best, and were using every resource you could. You in particular were really involved with the whole research project– it was the main reason why you were there. Every time there were news, whether they were minor or not, you were always the first one to be notified.

You were busy examining some of your notes and the pictures Rohan took when Jotaro knocked on your door. You sent your stand over to open the door, focusing on your studies. It was only when you smelled Jotaro’s sweet perfume filling the room that you finally lifted your eyes up from the books and the various pics in front of you. You greeted Jotaro with a weak smile, as he sat down next to you.

“Thought you could use some coffee.” He said, leaving a fuming cup in front of you.

You thanked him, and proceeded to take a long sip from the cup.

“How is it going?” he asked.

You sighed, running an hand through your hair as if that gesture could help you reorganise your thoughts. You explained everything to him, ranting a bit about how stressing the whole situation felt. Every time you thought you got closer to finding Kira, something happened that forced you to start all over again. He wasn’t like every other serial killer you studied about; he was always a step ahead of everyone.

Jotaro listened carefully to your words, nodding sometimes to let you know that he was really paying attention to what you were saying. Once you finished, he looked a bit perplexed and offered you his insight regarding the whole situations. You trusted his words more than anyone else’s – you knew he had great analytical skills, you would have trusted him with your life. Something you already did in the past.

The two of you spent the night together, smoking some cigarettes while discussing about every possibility regarding Kira’s escape. He sat exactly next to you on the sofa, reading some documents given to you by the Speedwagon foundation when you tiredly rested your head on his shoulder.

This gesture made his muscles contract for a second, catching him out of guard. He turned to look at you, your eyes almost closed because of your tiredness. Without saying a word, Jotaro leaned his lips against your head, leaving a soft kiss on it before continuing reading his documents as if nothing happened. It wasn’t long until you fell asleep. When Jotaro noticed it, he wasn’t sure about moving. He didn’t want to wake you up, but he knew that wasn’t the most comfortable position for you to sleep in. He slowly lied on the sofa, letting you rest your head on his chest. He put his white coat on you, deciding to stay there for the night.

You woke up next to him the following morning, your bodies completely intertwined. You were confused, as you didn’t remember falling asleep. Also, you didn’t really want to bother Jotaro this much, and immediately felt bad about it. You slowly got up, leaving the beautiful man sleep on the sofa of your hotel room. After a quick shower, you headed towards the hotel’s canteen to buy some breakfast for both of you.

When you finally returned to your room, you saw Jotaro stretching up, standing tall in the middle of the room. “Morning” he whispered in a low, raspy voice.

Smiling as if you were a teenager in love, you replied and offered him a donut.

“I’m sorry for yesterday. You could have woken me up.” You said shyly, doing your best to avoid eye contact.

He hinted a small laugh, messing your hair with his hand.

“No need to apologise, silly. It’s fine, I fell asleep too.”

-

Days passed by, and you knew you were getting closer to find out Kira’s identity. Your days however, weren’t made up solely by studies, researches or fight. Most of the time you found yourself spending time with the Joestar’s family: you would usually have dinner with Josuke, Jotaro, Joseph and Josuke’s mum, spending quality time together and hearing funny anecdotes from Josuke and Joseph. You also had the chance to meet Jolyne a few times; Jotaro drove you out of city because he really cared about letting the two of you meet. And it was a good thing: you and jolyne relly got along with each other, almost as if you had been friends in a previous lifetime.

Although Jotaro was never vocal about it, he was important to him to see how  along you got with his family. He loved seeing you playing with Jolyne, and he knew how much you appreciated and respected Joseph. It was also nice to see you getting along with Josuke – both of you had a lively personality, and he grew affectionate towards you really quickly. Sometimes, Jotaro would find your bond a bit irritating – but he knew Josuke was only a 14 y/o boy. He was also conscious about how irrationally jealous he could become, so he never really spoke about it.

As time passed, Jotaro became more and more aware of his feelings towards you. He never forgot you and now every emotion he felt in the past was simply coming back.

 The two of you spent an awful amount of time together, always finding new excuses to do so. Whether it was to investigate over Kira, training to prepare for the final battle or simply visiting some new places, there wasn’t a moment when you weren’t with him; and although he felt incredible bad for thinking about it, Jotaro hoped to find Kira as late as possible.

He needed more time; more time to fully understand what was going on inside his mind and his heart, more time to find the right words to explain everything to you, more time to understand whether his feelings were reciprocated or not.

It was during the final battle with Kira that he finally had the responses he needed.

Seeing you covered in blood made his heart beat incredibly fast. For minutes that felt like an eternity he did not know what to do, how to act - something which was very unusual for him. Jotaro had always been the kind of person to think rapidly, without letting his emotions overwhelm him. But this time it was different. He left you and Josuke fighting alone against Kira for too much time and now the both of you were in danger. It was something he already experience before in Egypt, and he wasn’t willing to lose anyone else.  You kept one of Josuke’s arms around your shoulders to help him standing, the young boy still towering you even if his figure was arched over you. Both of you were covered in blood and with various injuries over your bodies. You were still able to stand on your feet, looking angrily at Kira who was grinning in response. Your breath was heavy and you didn’t have much strength left in your body, but when you saw Jotaro, you knew you had to hold on.

You gave him a quick look, his face covered with worry and fear. “I’ll cover your back but you'll have to be quick.” you said, summoning your powerful Stand once again. Jotaro understood your plan, and without losing anymore time he started walking towards you, becoming close enough to use Star Platinum against your enemy.

“Star Platinum. The World!” he said, stopping time and letting Kira have a taste of Star Platinum’s punches.

Before he let time flow again, he gently picked your body up in his arms and stepped far enough from the explosion Killer Queen would have caused moments later. Shielding you with his own body, time started to flow again. You looked at him smiling, gratefully crouching yourself onto his chest, trying your best to recover some energie and enjoying the warmth of his body.

“Thanks for always being my hero.”

Jotaro couldn’t help but smile hearing those words, shaking his head in response.

“I just returned you a favour.”, he added.

-

Two weeks passed by since the defeat of Yoshikage Kira.

You and Jotaro decided to stay in Morio-cho a bit longer than what you originally planned. The time spent together allowed you to discuss your mutual feelings and, after a long night of passion and love, you started dating.

It was awkward at first. You and Jotaro never really officialised your relationship; you just let things between you evolve naturally, preferring a physical love language over words – what united the two of you wasn’t something that could have been easily described. However, he eventually confessed you that he had loved you since your trip in Egypt, receiving a: “I did too, idiot.” in response.

As time went by, you and Jolyne managed to build a strong, beautiful bond – so much, she’d start to refer to you as a parental figure and nothing less. Jotaro loved seeing the two of you together; you were the people he loved the most, and he was happy his little daughter liked you as much as he always did.

[the-most-slytherin-hufflepuff]

Wildcards

Hello peeps. So I found this little thing in my drafts and decided to post it. It was supposed to be the start of a coffee shop AU that I started writing ages ago and forgot about. So here you go, I may write a part 2 at some point. 

cw: mentions of food and some cursing

Finn was walking towards his favorite bookstore, because he somehow had already finished reading almost all the books on his shelf and, like the nerd he is, needed to go buy more. 

He arrived at the store without any idea of what he wanted to buy, he never did. He just went and looked for pretty book covers and hoped they were good, infallible logic if you asked him. By the time he finished looking around he had found five books, two of which he already had on his reading list but had never actually bought, the other three were wild cards since he had never heard of them before. He sent a quick text to Logan that he would be home soon and went to the register to check out. 

Finn was not someone that got caught off guard by people’s looks easily, except for his boyfriend who looked like a god, in his humble opinion, but the boy behind the counter was really testing that fact. He had curly blonde hair and baby blue eyes and— Finn needed to stop staring because staring is weird. 

“Hi, did you find everything you were looking for?”. Finn cursed all the gods, demons and deities in existence for giving the stranger such a nice voice.  A fact that did nothing to help his panic over the cute boy. 

Finn realized he should probably answer since a few seconds had passed, “Yeah, I wasn't really looking for anything, just walking around to see if I found something interesting.” 

The cute boy hummed in acknowledgement before responding, “ Do you come here often, I don't think i’ve seen you before”, he paused for a second before adding, “then again I have been working here for about two weeks so maybe that’s why”.    

“I come here a lot actually. Books and coffee,  what more could a college student need”, the cute boy looked at Finn with an unreadable expression before answering. “Money, sleep, and the will to live”.

 Finn burst out laughing at that and the cute boy soon joined. When the laughter subsided to light chuckling the cute boy continued. “I’m kidding, but yeah this place is pretty cool and I get free coffee so win-win” They talked for a little longer since the bookshop side of the store was pretty much deserted. Finn finally managed to ask for the guy's name. 

Leo. 

*~*~*~*~*

By the time Finn got back to the apartment he shared with Logan it was almost dark outside. He opened the door and walked to his and Logan’s room. He put the bag with the books near his shelf, he would have to organize them later, and walked out to the living room. 

Logan was sprawled on the floor staring up at the ceiling, tapping out the beat to the song he was listening to with his fingers. Finn came into Logan’s line of sight, waiting for his boyfriend to pause the song. 

“I’m going to make dinner.”

“Do not burn the kitchen O’Hara, we don’t have any fire extinguisher in the apartment”, Logan yelled, from his place on the floor. 

“Shut up Tremz”, Finn yelled back, a bright smile taking over his face when he heard Logan’s laugh. 

Finn went about preparing dinner, his mind going over his day. He woke up early, got ready, kissed Logan goodbye and went to class. He and a few classmates discussed whether or not Patroclus and Achilles dated, Finn would die saying that they had and no one would ever change his mind or history. Remus and Lily helped him with his homework for creative writing and then he left for the bookstore. 

The bookstore with an incredibly cute cashier named after his favorite constellation with the most beautiful blue eyes Finn had ever seen. That had thrown him for a loop, Finn had a boyfriend that he loved more than life itself, and yet Leo had taken his breath away. 

“If you think any faster you’re going to get a headache.” Logan hugged him from behind, wrapping his arms around Finn’s torso. He placed a kiss to the top of Finn’s spine. “What’s wrong?” 

“What makes you think something’s wrong?” 

“You have your ‘life is confusing me right now’ face. So tell me”, he moved so he could look at Finn’s face, “what’s going on.”

Finn sighed, putting the temperature of the stove at medium so the pot wouldn’t boil over and dropping the pasta in the hot water. “Nothing is really wrong. It’s just that”, he took a breath, trying to force his mind to put his feelings into words. “I just thought that having a boyfriend was supposed to stop me from having gay panics when I see cute boys in public.” Logan snorted amusement dancing in his green eyes. “Alas, there was a cute cashier in the bookstore. And I am very gay.” 

Logan let his forehead drop to Finn’s shoulder, trying very hard to not laugh. “You’re such a disaster, love”, Logan’s voice shook with barely suppressed laughter. He looked back up at Finn, who turned to face him with a small pout. 

“It’s not funny Lo. I literally stood in front of the poor guy for like five seconds staring like a fucking idiot.” 

Logan couldn’t hold it in anymore. He burst out laughing, standing on his tip toes to kiss Finn’s pout away. “So basically, exactly what happened the day we met?” Logan said after the last of his laughter faded away.  

“No”, Finn responded indignantly. “Maybe”, he conceded when Logan raised an eyebrow at him. Logan nodded, gave his boyfriend another short kiss and left the kitchen so Finn could finish making dinner.  

After dinner they sat curled up on the couch. Logan turned on the TV, the episode they had left unfinished last night began playing. Halfway through the next episode Logan spoke up, “So, a cute cashier huh?”

Finn blushed lightly at Logan’s teasing tone. “In my defense, he was very cute and funny.” 

“What, like, Remus cute or me cute?”  

“The word cute is losing all meaning to me”, Finn said. “But to answer your question, it was more you than Remus.” His nose scrunched up, “Remus is adorable the same way puppies are adorable.” 

 Logan nodded in agreement. They settled into comfortable silence. He had laid his head down on Finn’s lap who was playing with Logan’s soft curls. The words from the TV had stopped making sense and Logan found it very hard to keep his eyes open. He heard Finn whisper something, but he couldn't make out the words. 

When Logan managed to open his eyes again Finn was standing in front of him. “Sit up baby.” 

Logan whined in protest. “I don’t wanna walk.” 

Finn laughed softly. “I’ll carry you if you want, but you’re not sleeping on the couch.”

Logan sat up with a tired groan, making grabby hands at Finn. The red head lifted him off the couch and began walking towards their bedroom. Logan had let his head fall on his boyfriend’s shoulder, pressing lazy kisses to Finn’s jaw. “I love you”, he murmured sleepily. 

“I love you too”, he said, laying Logan down on the bed. He went to the dresser, chuckling when Logan whined sleepily at him to come back. “I’m just looking for something, don’t worry.” He threw one of his hoodies at Logan, who gave a huff of indignation when it hit him in the face. 

“Rude”, Logan muttered, pulling the hood over his face, pulling on the strings and laying down with his back to Finn. He smiled when he heard his boyfriend’s bright laugh echo through the room. The bed dipped and he felt a warm weight settle in front of him. Finn pushed the hood from his eyes and looked at him. He grabbed the back of Logan’s neck and kissed him. “I’m sorry”, he whispered. 

“You have to make it up to me.” Logan kept his voice low. 

“What do you want?”

“Cuddles,'' Logan answered. 

“I can do that”, Finn said, opening his arms so that Logan could scoot closer. He wrapped his arms around the smaller boy and placed a soft kiss on his forehead. “Good night my love”. 

“G’night”, he murmured sleepily. Finn held Logan a little closer, falling asleep minutes later, lulled by Logan’s soft snores. 

[superbadassnatural]

A Lot to Make up For

Summary: Dean threw a fit when he saw something he didn’t like. To say you were angry with him was an understatement. The least thing he could do was make-up for his behavior. Pairing: Dean x Reader Word count: 4,647 Warnings: smut, oral sex (fem receiving), p in v, little bit of spanking, jealous!Dean, mentions of fwb relationship, a bit of crack? A/N: this was written for “SPN Bi-Weekly Challenge” hosted by the amazing @supernatural-jackles. There are three prompts in this one and they are all bolded. I’m trying to understand why tumblr flagged this post when I uploaded the gif I made, which is similar to this one, but not flagged it when I used someone else’s. Either way, at least one of them worked. Please, enjoy it!

(x)

When you decided to come to the bar, you didn’t expect it to be this crowded. Loud conversations competed with the sound of the electronic music. Somehow you managed to find an empty barstool and ran for it. You ordered a beer, sipping at it, unsure of what you were really doing here.

You needed a night out. It had been a while since you last went out by yourself. You usually hung out with the boys, but this time you didn’t want to. It’s not like you didn’t want to be around them, you just wanted to enjoy some quality time alone.

A man sat beside you. He seemed to be around your age and he was definitely a sight for sore eyes. The man turned to you, introduced himself, and started a small talk that turned into an interesting — and mostly funny — conversation.

Andrew was good to be around. He was a stranger, but he somehow knew how to make you laugh. He even bought you a couple of beers and fries.

Maybe it was the alcohol talking, but it wouldn’t be a bad idea to get out of the bar and have your way with him between the sheets. Or maybe it was the way he was flirting with you that was making those thoughts run through your mind. You didn’t even notice he was that close to you. Your knees brushed each other under the wooden counter. His knuckles ran down your forearm. Every now and then his brown eyes would descend to your lips as you spoke. He wanted it as much as you did.

“You know, I was thinking...” he scooted closer, eyes leaving yours to dart to your painted lips. “Maybe we should-“

“Oh, there you are,” a familiar voice interrupted him.

Dean. He stepped towards you, a smile playing on his lips. Both you and Andrew frowned.

“I’ve been looking everywhere for you, sweetheart,” his hand made its way to your waist as he planted a kiss to the side of your head.

“Dean, what’re you doing here?” You asked, trying to pull away from his hold.

“I was worried sick, baby,” he said. “Don’t ever do that again.”

“I’m sorry,” Andrew stepped in just as confused as you. “Who are you?”

“I’m Dean, her boyfriend,” he beamed, holding out his hand, but Andrew didn’t take it. “Listen, thanks, man, for taking care of her. I’m glad you were keeping her company. Who knows what would happen if you weren’t here. Maybe some bastard would’ve tried to take advantage of her.”

“Her boyfriend?” The man was trying to wrap his mind around what Dean was saying.

“No!” You jumped it.

“Yeah,” he said at the same time as you did. “I don’t know why she’s saying I’m not.”

“Sorry, man,” he looked at you as if you were some lying bitch. “She told me she was single.”

“I am single! He’s my friend.”

“Well, I don’t know if she’s told you, but she suffers from short-term memory loss,” Dean pursed his lips.

What the hell is he talking about, you thought to yourself.

“You know, like Dory from Finding Nemo,” he added. “She probably forgot we were dating. She’s probably going to forget about you too so I suggest you go away. If she forgets you and sees you, she won’t understand a thing. It’ll only make her poor mind even more confused.”

“It must be hard to deal with that,” Andrew sighed, buying Dean’s crap. “Well, I’ll leave you guys be. Sorry about that, man.”

Andrew headed out of the bar. You were too dumbfounded by the whole situation to go after him and explain that your best friend was delusional. He probably wouldn’t believe it anyway. Dean burst into laughter.

“Are you out of your mind?” You nearly roared at him, slapping his hands off of you.

“Oh, you gotta admit that was funny,” he gushed between laughter.

“No, Dean, it wasn’t,” you glared at him. “It was ridiculous and extremely disrespectful. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going home.”

You stormed out of the bar with Dean hot on your tail. Your blood was boiling. What was wrong with him? Why couldn’t he just let you get some tonight? You stopped in front of your car and turned to him.

“Get lost, Winchester. I don’t want you near me tonight.”

“C’mon, sweetheart. I’m your best friend. I’m your favorite person in this whole world,” he bargained.

“Best friend?” You chuckled humorlessly. “Since when best friends do stuff like that? Seriously, Dean, that was low even for you. I don’t wanna see you tonight or tomorrow or for the rest of the week! Not even if you’re covered in gold.”

“Not even if I’m naked and covered in gold with your favorite chocolate?”

“No. Actually, the thought of you naked just made me throw up in my mouth a little.”

“Well, that wasn’t what you said a few days ago,” he had the cockiest grin playing on his lips. Maybe he thought he could charm his way and you would forgive him.

“Fuck you,” you sneered. “If you do so much as follow me, I’m gonna murder you!”

Hopping in your car, you turned the engine and headed home. Your hands gripped tight the steering wheel, knuckles turning white. You couldn’t for the life of you understand what had gotten into him. He’d never acted like that. He didn’t have the right to.

In about ten minutes you arrived at the condominium you live in. Parking in your spot, you let out a frustrated sigh before climbing off the car. You were glad he didn’t follow you. At least he had a little respect for you.

As you stepped foot into your apartment you rushed to the bathroom. A shower would do wonders for your tense muscles. Maybe it would even wash your anger away. You turned on the water and checked the temperature before hopping in. You relaxed immediately as the warm water hit your skin.

Although you felt more relaxed after showering, your mind was still on a thousand miles per hour. Dean had never behaved the way he did tonight. Throughout your eleven years of friendship, he had never disrespected you or crossed any boundaries. But tonight he did. Maybe he was angry because you decided to hit a bar and didn’t invite him. It doesn’t justify his behavior.

You’d be lying if you said you were just friends. Over a year ago, after many drinks you and Dean had sex. It was nice, but you barely remembered anything the following morning. So you did it sober. It might have been a dumb idea, but boy it felt good. Dean suggested you should keep doing that and you agreed. No strings attached. No exclusivity. Just two friends blowing off some steam every now and then.

What you have with Dean doesn’t give him the right to act the way he did. He’s not your boyfriend. Both of you agreed that it was okay to see other people and even have sex with them — always with protection. Aside from Dean, you only had sex with one person since you started to fool around. Now, when you finally got the chance to hang out with some guy, he decided to show up and throw a fit? Who does he think he is?

“Ah, screw him,” you mumbled.

Shifting into your ideal sleeping position, your body relaxed on the mattress. Thank God for memory foam. It didn’t take long for tiredness to take over and for you to drift off to sleep.

The unceasing sound of the doorbell ringing startled you. You stood to your feet abruptly, but soon regretted when you felt dizzy. Putting on your robe, you headed to the front door not even bothering to look through the peephole. It seemed to be some kind of emergency. No one would be ringing the doorbell this late if it wasn’t urgent. Unlocking the door, you opened it.

“Hey. How can I-“ you stopped once you met his green eyes. “What the hell are you doing here?”

“Y/N, I’m sorry-“

“I don’t want to talk to you right now,” you hissed, trying to push the door close but his feet stopped you.

“I need to talk to you.”

“I don’t care. It’s fucking three in the morning. I have to get up early to go to work,” your hand gripped tight to the knob, ready to close the door in his face if he tried to come in. “I’m sorry, but not everyone works for their dad and can show up late everyday.”

“We both know tomorrow is your day off,” he said. “Please let me in. I need to talk to you. Then you can kick me out and go back to your beauty sleep.”

“Fine,” you rolled your eyes, stepping aside for him to come in. “But only because I’m mad at you and I’m in the mood for a fight.”

“Can we fight so we can have angry make-up sex later?” A smirk appeared on his plump lips.

“Sex with you?” You snickered. “Never again.”

“C’mon, sweetheart,” he pleaded. “It’s been two weeks since we had some fun.”

“Did you come here so you could get laid? Did ou wake me up just so you could have sex with me? Really, Dean?”

“No, of course not. If I wanted to have sex with you, I would have texted you first,” he said. “I came here to apologize.”

“Oh, so you know you screwed up. Good.”

“Would you let me finish?” You rolled your eyes crossing your arms over your chest. “I came here to surprise you. I thought we could have a sleepover since you don’t have to go to work tomorrow. I even brought my Die Hard collection so we could watch it tonight. I bought two slices of pie on the way. Cherry for me and apple for you. Imagine my surprise when I open the door and there’s not a single light on.”

“So what? Are you telling me that it’s my fault now? I should have stayed home waiting for you?” You pointed your finger at him. “Is that the reason why you did what you did at the bar?”

“I looked for you everywhere. Then Jess told me you went out for a drink at Hardy’s. So I went after you. When I saw that guy with his hands all over you, I flipped. I knew I couldn’t punch him and start a fight so I did that.”

“You know you’re not my boyfriend, right? Or my father for that matter?” You stepped closer to him. “So why did you have to ruin things for me tonight? I’ve never done anything like that to you. Never! Why did you have to be such an idiot?”

“I was jealous, okay?” He growled.

“It still doesn’t give you the right to do that, Dean,” you yelled at him. “You know, Dean, every time you, Sam, and I go to a bar, you leave us on the table to hit on the bartender. I wouldn’t have a problem with that if your brother was single. Don’t get me wrong, I love Jess, but if Sam was single then he’d hit on someone and I’d be free to do that too. Or even better, I could make out with him!” You exclaimed, knowing it would piss him off. “Oh, Jess told me some things that you probably don’t wanna know, but they were really interesting. In case you don’t know, girls talk about sex too. From what she’s told me, I bet he’s better than you. I mean, he’s definitely bigger so-“

“Shut up!” He yelled. You could see his jaw tightening as the veins in his neck throbbed.

“You know what’s even worse? When Jess comes with us, I’m third-wheeling most of the time. For some reason, they won’t let me get two feet away from them.”

“I hit on the bartenders to make you jealous. It’s all fake,” he nearly barked. “I thought that maybe if I did that I’d get a reaction from you because I’m too much of a coward to do the right thing.”

“You do remember our agreement, right? Just sex. No feelings. We are non-exclusive. We can see other people and even have sex. We made a bunch of rules back in that day. One of them was no cockblocking,” your blood was boiling in your veins. You could feel your anger grow with every word you said.

“I’m sorry, okay? But I couldn’t just stand there and watch that son of a bitch getting all handsy.”

“While you were having fun with bartenders and girls you met every time we went out, I was alone. Since we started this, I’ve only had sex with one person and it was-“

“Terrible. I know you said the guy was awful.”

“It’s not that I think I should be having sex with half of the men in town, but if you can have sex with everyone you want then why can’t I? Every time I try to hang out with someone, I get sabotaged.”

“Ever since we started this, I’ve only had sex with you. I tried to be with someone else but it didn’t work because she wasn’t you.”

“Oh my God, it was you!” Reality downed to you as you ignored him. The sound of your raged heart much louder than his voice. “You sabotaged me every time! The broken lock, flat tires, and all that crap that happened every time I got close to a guy. They were all you.”

“Yeah, it was me,” Dean barked. “You deserve better than those guys.”

“Who gave you the right to do that, you idiot? Why did you have to do that?”

“Because I love you dammit!” His voice was much louder, causing you to flinch.

“Well, maybe that’s the problem!” You yelled back at him.

You spun around completely done with him, your head was pounding in your skull. The last thing you saw before storming out of the apartment was his jaw wiring shut as his eyes filled with rage.

The door slammed with a loud thud, startling Dean. He was pulled out of his angry trance when he noticed he was standing alone in the middle of your apartment. He knew he had screwed up big time. He’d not planned on confessing his feelings to you tonight. Especially not like this.

You stood dumbstruck in the hall just outside your door. Everything happened so fast. One minute you were peacefully asleep, the other you and Dean were almost jumping at each other’s throats. He shouldn’t have said he loves you. And you shouldn’t have stormed out the way you did.

“God, what have I done?” you sighed.

The sound of the door opening and closing echoed through the corridor. You didn’t want to turn around. You couldn’t face him.

“You realize you just stormed out of your apartment, right?” He let out a small chuckle to try to light up the mood.

“You see what you do to me?” You turned around to face him. His green eyes held anything but anger. “You make me so mad that I do stupid things like storming out of my own home when I should’ve kicked you out.”

“Hey, you don’t need me to do stupid things. You can do that on your own,” he held his hands up, a cheeky grin playing on his lips. “Now let’s get inside, shall we?”

You only nodded, following him back inside.

“So what do we do now, huh?” He asked, shutting the door.

“You don’t love me. I mean- you do, but as your best friend.”

“No, Y/N, I love you as more than my best friend.”

“Stop,” you argued. “You can’t, okay? Or you’re gonna ruin everything.”

“Ruin what? We both know this is not a friends with benefits shit. It never was.”

“Dean-“

“This is not one-sided and you know it, Y/N,” he said, voice deeper than usual. “What we did… what we do is not just sex. Or do I have to tell you how many times we actually made love?”

“Why are you doing this?” Your voice wavered.

“Because I love you, Y/N.”

“Then don’t. You’re screwing things up.”

“Why can’t you just admit it? Why is it so hard for you to finally say it?”

“I can’t risk losing you,” you said low enough that he almost didn’t hear you. Almost. “The moment we take that step there’s no going back and I can’t risk losing you. I can’t.”

“You’re not gonna lose me,” he placed his hands on both sides of your hips, his body incredibly close to yours.

“You can’t promise me that.”

“You’re right. I can’t, but I’ll do anything to be with you.”

Fingers curling in the collar of his flannel, you pulled him to you, capturing his lips with yours. Your heart skipped a beat as he returned the kiss. It was slow at first, almost uncertain. The soft press of his lips made you melt into his touch. Your tongue caressed his plump lips in a plea for him to allow you to delve into his mouth. A muffled moan escaped his lips as his hands came up to cup your face, thumb circling your cheek.

You pulled away in need of air. Your eyes were still closed as you rested your forehead against his.

“I don’t know about you but I’m still down for some angry make-up sex,” he said between panted breaths.

“Dean-“

“Stop denying what you want, Y/N.”

Swallowing thick, you opened your eyes only to meet his green orbs hooded with lust. With arms around his neck, you wrapped your legs around his waist, lips colliding with his. Warm hands held you by the back of your thighs as he walked towards your bedroom. He pushed you against the wall, placing you back on the floor. His lips graced the skin of your neck with sweet yet hungry kisses. Your body was pressed flush to him. You could feel his heart beating fast against your chest and his growing bulge against your pelvis. A moan left your lips as one of his hands hiked up your leg and squeezed your thigh over the silky robe. Dean pressed himself to you and you bucked your hips, the feeling of his erection against your soaked pussy setting your body on fire.

Hurried hands fumbled with the knot tying your robe. He pushed it off your shoulders, revealing your naked before him, the soft material pooling around your feet.

“Fuck,” he said in a low grunt as his eyes wandered over your bare chest.

A smile spread on your lips. Always the same reaction from him. You unbuttoned his flannel, dropping it to the floor. As Dean yanked his white shirt over his head, your hands reached for his naked torso, traveling down to his abdomen and stopping over his belt, quickly unbuckling it. He pulled down his pants, standing in front of you only in his boxers. You pushed him towards the bed, straddling his hips as he sat. Hungry lips captured his plump, pink ones, his hands snaked to your back. The soft touch of his fingertips sending shivers down your spine.

“Need you,” a breathy moan escaped your lips.

Dean’s back met the softness of the mattress, green eyes sparkling at the sight of you on top of him. You leaned and his hands reached for your breasts. Fingers nipped at your hardened bud as his mouth enveloped the other. His name escaped your lips in a tiny whimper as you rolled your hips against him. He released your nipple with a pop and planted kisses everywhere he could touch.

You pushed down his boxers, revealing his hard cock in all its glory. Your small hand wrapped around his length, stroking it before circling the head with your thumb.

“Fuck, sweetheart,” he hissed. “Want you. I need to taste you. Come up here.”

You crawled up, knees around his broad shoulders. As your hands met the headboard, he lowered your body to his face. Dean wanted to take his time. He peppered open-mouthed kisses on the inside of your thighs. He ran his nose over your folds and you let out a frustrated moan.

“Stop teasing.”

“Tell me what you need, sweetheart,” although you didn’t see it, you felt his lips curl into a smirk.

“I need to cum.”

Three teasing licks from your slit to clit caused your breath to hitch on your throat. He wanted to drive you insane and he definitely knew how to do it. Dean licked and sucked your most sensitive parts. Parts he knew by heart. His tongue entered your channel and you saw stars. Fingers finding their course to his hair, gripping it to the point of pain. A guttural grunt from him made your whole body shudder. You tried to buck your hips against his sinful mouth, but his strong grip on your hips restrained your movements. He kept pushing his tongue as far as he could, tasting your sweetness as he feasted. Muffled moans and husky hums escaped his lips, reverberating through your soaked folds. He enjoyed this as much as you did.

“Hmm, yes,” you moaned.

When you felt his grasp on you loosen, you rolled your hips. All your self-consciousness fading as the need to come grew stronger. Your hands dropped to the mattress, ass angling up. His tongue started to circulate your clit, sending small shivers through your body. You glanced over your shoulder, eyes landing on his hand stroking his cock slowly. Your cunt clenched around nothing. His teeth grazed over your bundle of nerves, nipping slightly. The burning coil in your abdomen tightened. Dean sealed his lips around your clit and you went off as a rocket. Your legs trembled around his head as he kept sucking. Waves of pleasure washed over you.

“Fuck, Dean,” you yelled out his name along with a bunch of obscenities.

Dean moaned as he lapped at your juices. He licked you clean until you rode out your orgasm. He kissed your sensitive clit before helping you scooting down so you could meet his face.

“Hi,” you smiled as you laid on top of him.

“Hey,” his plump lips were shining with your release, his cheeks a bright pink.

You leaned to capture his lips. A moan was muffled by his mouth as you tasted yourself in his tongue. The kiss didn’t last though. Both of you were in some serious need of air to make it last.

“I bet the neighbors know my name,” he beamed with the cockiest smirk.

“Oh, shut up,” with a roll of eyes, you started to plant open-mouthed kisses down his throat.

“You know they do. Especially after tonight. The way you-“ he stopped as you sucked at a sensitive spot on the side of his neck. “Shit, Y/N. Need to be inside you.”

He flipped you onto your back, laying on top of you. His lips attacked yours in a hungry, bruising kiss. Your hand reached for his cock, positioning it at your entrance.

“No, not like this. I have other things in mind,” he said with a crooked grin. “On all fours, sweetheart.”

Dean pulled away and you did as told. Your ass perked up and his warm hands gripped your hips. He squeezed your skin and you groaned in anticipation. The tip of his cock circled your entrance.

“Please,” a sweet little cry escaped your lips.

You whimpered as he pushed inside you ever so slow. His massive size stretching your walls to fit him. Dean groaned. He slid out almost completely before thrusting into you with such force that you gasped.

“Fuck, Y/N,” he grunted. “You feel so good. So tight.”

His blunt fingernails digging into the flesh of your hips as he pounded into you relentlessly. Sweat broke through your body as your breath started to come in short spurts. His hand collided with your right cheek, causing your body to jerk. Then he did the same to the other one and you hissed. Dean leaned against you, kissing your shoulder blade.

“You like this, don’t you?” His voice barely upon a whisper, hot breath fanning at your clammy skin. “You like it when I take you just… like… this?” His thrusts matched his words, sending you over the edge once again.

“Yes!”

His hand smacked harder at your right cheek as he pulled away. That definitely was going to leave a mark. Your skin tingling at the stingy sensation. He slammed in and out of you like a madman. The sound of skin slapping against skin echoed through the room along with shameless cries and husky grunts. The heat in your core started to grow even more. You fell forward into the mattress, fingers curling the sheets. Your walls pulsated around him as your orgasm hit you abruptly. Dean sent another five deep-seated thrusts and had you screaming into the pillow in pure ecstasy.

You were so lost in the feeling that you didn’t notice Dean flipping you into your back. He leaned down nuzzling into your neck, before sliding back into you. He kept driving in and out of you, his breath erratic. Your hands slapped against his back, nails digging into his skin, heels digging into his ass. You needed as much of him as you could get.

“Come with me, sweetheart,” he nearly pleaded as he pulled away from your neck.

His hips pistoned against yours, sloppy thrusts aiming for the final push. The thumps of the headboard  banging against the wall mixed with the sound of his balls slapping against your ass. Dean delivered three deep thrusts before his body stiffened. He held himself there as he painted your walls white with his seed. Your orgasm rippled through you. You clenched around him so tight, milking his cock for all its worth. His green orbs locked in your lust blown eyes as his lips parted in a perfect “o” shape, mirroring your expression, though no sound came from any of you. Tears pricked in the corner of your eyes as pleasure washed through you.

Dean collapsed on top of you, his head nuzzling in the curve of your neck. He placed a kiss to your skin before rolling to his side. Both of you waited for your breaths to even. Only then, when the room had grown quiet, you noticed the orange glow in the room caused by the strays of sunshine that managed to get past the blinds.

“Hot damn,” he let out a content sigh.

“What we did tonight… it should be illegal,” you half-chuckled.

“I know, sweetheart. I know,” he had a stupid grin on his face the whole time.

“Don’t sweetheart me,” you pouted. “I’m still mad at you.”

“Really? C’mon! I thought I had made myself up to you by making you come three times. Wasn’t that enough?”

“Of course not! You cockblocked me. Who knows how many times I would’ve cum if I was with that guy,” you shrugged.

“None. Plus, he doesn’t love you so it wouldn’t be nearly as exciting as this was.”

“You still need to make yourself up to me. ’Sides, you didn’t even tie the record, Dean. I’ve made myself come more times using just my fingers and a couple of toys.”

“Is that a challenge, sweetheart?”

“Only if you wanted it to be,” you smirked.

Dean rolled over you, his hand making its way to cup your mound. “I bet you still have my cum dripping from this tight pussy.”

“Why don’t you find out for yourself?”

I’d love to know what you think of this one! Please, consider sharing your thoughts with me via reply, reblog or ask!

Dean Sweethearts:

@maya-craziness @akshi8278 @spookytaylors​ @thisismysecrethappyplace @witch-of-letters

[natromanxoff]

I wasn’t sure about posting this at first but as it is already shared publicly and I have come across with it on Pinterest, I decided that it would be okay. So here is a story of a fan about Jim Hutton:

“ON 23rd of March, there was a Queen Tribute band concert in Goresbridge and my boyfriend told me that Jim would come as well. He admitted that he had arranged with Stephen for Jim to come along. The concert was in the pub called The Spirit Store. What a great name for spiritual meeting, I thought. When I entered, Jim sat at the table with Stephen, Jascqueline, her sister Valeria and other family friends. There was nowhere to sit, so we just stood by the table for a while. When I looked at Jim, he appeared somewhat fragile and tiny, like a man who could easily be overlooked. He didn´t look anything like those photos portraying him in the books.

After a while, there was a free seat by the table and everyone, including Jim, moved in order for us to sit down. It was just one place and my friend Mike wanted to take it. He got up fast but they all stopped him. Jim measured Mike up and down and told him, "Perhaps you should let the lady sit here, you cavalier!" Embarassed, Mike got up from his chair and offered it to me. I got the honorable place alongside Jim. Being a woman sometimes has its advantages! Jim welcomed me with heartfelt "Hi". At first I was nervous, but after a while I felt relaxed and enjoyed Jim's company. I was aware of his behavior, gestures, laughter, and tried to absorb his energy all at once. It was easy to talk to him about anything and everything.

I wanted to know the man Freddie loved so much, so I guess I started giving him many questions.

"Jim, are you still in touch with Phoebe?" Jim looked at me closely and began to talk to me with interest. "I haven´t really been talking to him for a long time. I know he had a hotel in Dubai, then he sold it, and he's in Prague now. He also bought something overthere and I think he's going to settle down there." When I heard about Prague, I jumped up excitedly and told him that I was from there. He smiled a little, though the coincidence like this didn´t overwhelm him as much as me.

He relished glass of Budwaiser and smoked Ultra light Silk Cuts. He offered me one and lit it up for me like a real gentleman. It seemed he wanted to continue talking. We both made fun of the ultralight effect of his cigarettes, which would probably piss off every orthodox smoker, Freddie for sure! He then demonstrated jokingly, how to properly smoke them. He inhaled all the smoke by sucking in his cheeks and widening his eyes, as if he should soon burst like an inflated toad. None of us resisted and we both burst into a mad laughter. I told him about my visit to Munich and meeting Barbara. He smiled and listened, then he rolled his eyes up to heaven and stated that she is one hell of a crazy woman. I totally agreed, and added, that also alcoholic one. It was surreal to talk about mutual aquaintances together, people we both knew. I also mentioned my visit to New York club and I could see how he returns nostalgically into his memories. Then I also tried to make him remember my friend Allison, who told me about him in the first place.

"About nine years ago she visited you in London". He couldn´t remember and admitted, that since then a lot of people have passed through his life and many of them he never saw again.

I continued. "She showed me several of your photos and in one of them you were holding Freddie's portrait that you bought at the auction". Suddenly he jumped up and said he knew whom I mean.

I showed him my miniature box containing a stone and talked about it with almost patriotic pride. "It's a stone from Logan Mews that I had to dig out from under the threshold of his house, because there was nothing else to take." Jim laughed out loud, this time without any hindrance and doubt that I was totally crazy. I also laughed because I knew I sound like nuts. He remarked with smile from ear to ear that I was pretty crazy. "Yeah, I'm crazy, and I'm proud to be. Who isn´t...and by the way.....why not?" I smiled at what I just said, because that´s what Freddie would say, to defend himself. Jim then talked about the medallion that Freddie had given him for his birthday. He said, there were three miniature pictures inside. "The first is that of Miko ", he said gently, looking up at me to make sure I knew who he was talking about. "In the other one is Freddie" ... he continued with kind of fervor and love. Something deep inside me shivered. "In the third one," ... he didn´t answer yet, when I jumped into his monologue ...."Tiffany," I blurted out.

"My mom's photo," he finished his sentence. (and I prayed he didn´t register my answer).

It was nice to hear him remembering like that. He opened up in front of me the way I never dreamt of. I think it was nice for him to share these beautiful moments and to talk about things that meant so much to him. "This rock is my good luck charm. I have been listening to Queen since I´m twelve and I also work in the Fan Club's office. We celebrate his anniversary every year. When I went here, I was kidding with my friends that I might meet Jim Hutton in Ireland... and here you are, sitting right next to me. That´s my dream come true", I said all emotional.

"How do you know Stephen?", he inquired after while.

"I go out with Vinnie and they are good friends" He eyed my boyfriend and indicated that he knew who he was.

"I was annoying the two of them and was constantly asking them to bring you", I smiled.

"Oh, Jacqueline wanted me to come, alright" Jim smiled at the thought. Then he talked about the music talent competition, in which they were selecting the best imitators of Queen.

"What music are you actually listening to?" I wondered.

"I have no favorite, I'm listening to almost everything. Even a radio".

"And do you still have Zig and Zag?"

He only sighed and said in a sad voice that they had both died since then.

"And do you have any other cats?"

"Yeah, I have seven others now," Jim smiled. This number didn´t surprise me. The old habits are hard to kill.

"Do you still keep up the gardening, Jim?"

"Constantly," he said with a loving smile and amusedly showed me his hands dirty from the clay and covered in sores. For God's sake, he must have been gardening a few minutes before going to a concert!, I thought to myself. A complete garden maniac.....

We were joking on the account of the band that was supposed to start playing long time ago, but somehow did not. He told me it would be nice to get drunk, so we didn´t know how terrible they were. That really made me crack up. He could be so funny.

He joked and emphasized to everyone around the table, that instead of a concert he could have been at home watching his favorite movie. In the same breath, he admitted that he was curious about their performance and that he hadn´t been out in ages.

He leaned over to me and confessed, that now he lived a life completely cut off from the rest of the world.

"We are basically the same, I am basically like him. Now I just enjoy loneliness and privacy. I don´t go out anywhere except my garden". I immediately knew whom he was referring to in his speech.

I said that I had discovered his house in Palatine and apologized when I saw his slightly concerned look. I said I was just little curious.

He then recalled a few of his encounters with the fans. One day there was an unknown car with a couple of strangers that arrived to his house. They came all way from Vienna and they found him by questioning people in a town! Not a hard thing to trace him, he said, as every cab driver in the area knows him pretty well. One local newspaper even published a photo of his house, and although they gave a wrong address, a lot of people had found him.

That made me laugh, because I knew what it means to be a devoted fan.

"On the other hand, it's nice to know that someone is constantly looking after you and giving you the feeling that all this is still alive," I added with a smile.

"Jim, do you still have your Volvo?"

"You mean the one that Freddie gave me?.....No, I don´t have it few years now, I´ve swapped it for a new one," he smiled.

He was all too gallant all the time, always lighting my cigarette.

He also wondered how long I would stay in Ireland, so I said that only another half a year.

"And you wanna come back here?" He asked suddenly.

"Oh, I'd love to. I'm trying to find a job either in Carlow or Kilkenny," I said enthusiastically.

Then I fell silent, looked at him and assured him "Definitely."

Each time he looked up into my eyes, I saw an incredibly nice person in front of me. Something in his silent expression suggested that he had suffered great deal of pain in life, but that he was now completely reconciled with his fate. Still, in his eyes shone a spark of unrelenting humor. In his company I forgot all about the world. I was happy to be able to make such an affluent and warm contact with him. The longer we knew each other, the closer we were.

When he wanted to go to the toilet, Stephen told him that the men's toilets were behind the bar and the ladies in front of the bar. It sounded like he wasn´t quite sure which one would Jim prefer.

But Jim didn´t care much and set off to the men's. I admit it made me laugh a little.

Then we continued our dialogue. I mentioned that I read both his and Phoebe's book, but that I couldn´t find his book anywhere in the stores. He confirmed that it´s out of print at the minute.

When I told him that I had stolen his book at the local library, he laughed and said that I should have asked him and he would have given me a copy, but he only had Italian version.

Finally, the band started to play. Everyone in the pub stood up and whole lot of us - as we were tucked in at the back, climbed onto the window ledges. I stood next to Jim, who remained seated.

He looked a little bit run over. I knew he was surrounded by the loneliness and I watched him with sadness. I lacked much power or words to comfort him. It was only after some wonderful songs that we both joined and got up. He could not remain sad in such a loving and friendly company for ever.

When he noticed the enormous, life-vibrant energy that only Queen music could produce in conjunction with a crowd of people singing, I think he forgot his personal pain. I could see pride in his face. He stood up and watched the band. Then he addressed me and made me come up onto the ledge above him to see better. I would not listen to anybody else, but from him it didn´t sound like an order. He wanted me to get the most out of it and it pleased me. Then we sat back and drank. Jim seemed to be getting cheerful and livelier. The more he drank, the more cheerful he was. The guys ordered him Red Bull with vodka. When I asked him if it was vodka, he claimed it was white lemonade! He put a warm glass of "vodka" on my hand, so I almost jumped out of my skin, which he thought was terribly funny.

Whatever he did, he looked at me as though I was the only person who knew what was behind his looks. His faces and funny grimaces reminded me of Freddie. He had a lot of subconsciously inherited poses and gestures from him. Even in his laughter I could detect an influence of Freddie's strong personality. He simply marked all people around him. It was not the same contagious and stormy laugh, but there was a spark of resemblance.

His niece Jacqueline, Valerie and Stephen, danced all the time on the ledge and Jim was pulling them and wrapping himself in between their legs, hugging them, clinging to them, and messing around like a little boy. It was a wonderful sight, as he was so happy and childish.

After some time, Jim lost himself in a crowd of concert goers, so I went to look for him. Without his company it felt such a sad place. It was as if he had fallen through the ground, which made me very nervous. Finally, I found him by the entrance table, where he was joking away with one old blonde, not too different from frivolous Barbara Valentin. I asked him for a photo together. At first he looked impenetrable but as soon as I threw a sad eye and smirked, he brightened up and agreed as if saying "You know you can, anything for you, darling"

His niece Valerie took our picture. He then whispered to me that he hopes I´ll send him some pictures later.

After that he announced that we are going back inside to listen to the band.

I saw them from close-up and I must say that it was much better to just hear them. They looked rather too comic with all their wigs. It was something that would make Freddie laugh too.

I told Jim that they don´t look very natural,which he agreed with, but he said he couldn´t complain about their music. He was totally right, because musically they weren´t bad and the singer had a very authentic voice.

Inside, everybody was dancing and Jim joined in and circled around them like a rogalo.

The whole pub vibrated with intense and loving energy. There was no one who would be bored. Jim then threw himself in the arms of his two nieces, who gently caressed him in his hair and embraced him. He let them take care of him, now vulnerable like a little lost child all of a sudden.

There was something deeply touching about it. He had closed his eyes and sadly lowered his head, as if his tears flowed deep inside, in his invisible world. I realized at this stage, how much he really loved Freddie. I was looking at him and I had a desire to caress him and comfort him but instead, I had to stand aside.

"You can have everything and yet feel alone", Freddie once said. But I was glad Jim had his family and friends around him, who cared and protected him. Jim was going through sorrow and joy,both at the same time, it seemed.

During one of his many shananigans, I caught him messing around with his niece's boyfriend.

He sat him on his knees and imitated sexual intercourse. It would seem offensive and utterly crazy to someone who didn´t know him. But we all did. Jim was laughing like crazy and when he finally looked at me, he seemed a little embarrassed by his behavior and gave me a look that said"I hope you won´t tell on me to Freddie"...but it was hard to take him seriously.

We both smiled conspiratorially at each other. In that sense, our relationship no matter how short-lived, was special. We understood one another in thoughts. He winked at me a couple of times, tapping my beer like an old buddy.

In one moment in particular, Jim leaned over me and whispered: "You as a fan have right to be crazy, but them" ... pointing at our dancing group of friends ... " they are fucked up", he said with smile and he began to knock his finger against his forehead. An international gesture that doesn´t need an interpreter!

Jim then went to the toilets for a while, and I, like a stray sheep, followed him through crowds of oblivious dancers. He was somewhat drunk at that time and barely retained a balance. He staggered a little like a broken tree. No surprise after god knows how many Red bulls and vodkas! I was bit afraid for him, so I supported him inconspicuously by both shoulders from behind. He went to the toilet and cared too little to even close the door behind him. If anyone was looking, he would see Jim Hutton pissing in a toilet bowl in his bright canary shirt.

At that moment they played the most touching song of all, These are the Days of our lives .... I stood by the door and listened, watching the band and waited for Jim. I don´t know why, perhaps because of the fate that brought me here, I suddenly felt terrible sorrow. I was sorry for Freddie and Jim. Tears poured into my eyes. I didn´t cry, but was very close to it. Jim suddenly appeared next to me and noticed my face. "What about those tears? I hope you don´t cry", but at this stage I was lost for words. His concern made me sad even more. Something inside me forced me to caress him. I hugged him gently around his neck and put my head on his shoulder for a moment. I wanted to let him know that I am very sorry about what happened to Freddie. He did not resist. He knew he wasn´t the only one in the world who was missing him. I looked into his eyes, and I told him a sentence that I didn´t know why I said, but I strongly felt it..."Jim, he's here, he IS here." His expression was rather confused at first. "Do you believe me?" ... I said this with a seriousness and a certain degree of self-assurance that he froze for a while. He looked thoughtful. He knew what I was talking about.

I seemed to only confirm his inner conviction. He didn´t say a word. He wiped my tear away with the edge of his hand and without warning, took me firmly by the hand and led me through crowds back to our friends. There was a lot of care and love in his touch. The music was just playing and Freddie just sang "I still love you" and I knew he did.

I didn´t want to leave, but I knew I said everything I needed to. I could not leave without saying goodbye. It would be a sin after all this to just disappear into eternity. I interrupted him from the conversation with someone else, leaned over the table and said, "Jim, I'm leaving now, so I want to say goodbye, it was great pleasure meeting you." I smiled as much as my heart allowed me to and shook his hand. He stared up and thought for a moment, and then, without any hesitance said, "We do not see each other for the last time." I didn´t know at this time how true his words were.

I thought I did not understand well, so I asked again, "sorry?" and he repeated patiently and more resolutely, "I shall surely see you again," while taking my hand into his hands and kissing it gently.

He left me in amazement. I stumbled out from there perplexed but still I could hear him talking about me to someone there. He probably said he hadn´t seen a bigger nutcase in a long time, assuming from his cute teddybear smile. Gosh I loved him so much!

The next day I learned from my friends that Jim was looking next morning for his jacket that he had forgotten in his car. Few days later, I've sent him the promised photographs. Jacquie confirmed that he called in to say he had received them allright.”

2001

“...And then I returned back to Ireland in 2004.

I had the opportunity to welcome Jim to my own home in Carlow sometime in 2006. He was Stephen´s surprise. When the door opened up, I didn´t see him at first.

Then his head popped out from the side of the door and with a laugh he emerged a bit later. He hugged me like we hadn´t seen each other for million years. What I felt at that moment was indescripable. My dear Jim back in my life and in my own house!

We all sat in the living room, Jim settled down on the sofa, I was sitting on the ground and absorbed the precious moments because I knew time spent with him was only borrowed time. Then we watched Queen videos and talked about Freddie as if he were in the next room. It was so surreal. Me and Jim agreed that our favorite video was Scandal, and he just added that Freddie didn´t like it very much because he couldn´t make any creative input in it, although he loved the song.

Then we talked about his illness, about him taking up to 40 pills a day to sustain his health and he also explained the difference between AIDS and HIV, as many people still didn´t know. We have talked so much and - above all - we laughed all night, almost at everything. It was so easy to succumb to his funny personality once again and to his heartfelt laughter. He made jokes about fancying my ex-boyfriend, whom he lied on top of on the sofa. Long time ago, I´ve sent him a letter explaining to him how Freddie has impacted my life. But I've forgotten I´ve ever written it and now I was faced with the horror that I actually have sent it. I hoped he has forgotten about it, but when Jim and I met in the corridor of our house, I couldn´t but apologize to him for that letter, and for being so daring. To my surprise, he looked at me softly with his tired eyes and assured me that my letter was absolutely fascinating. Then we were interrupted by Stephen, who was just leaving a toilet and the conversation was cut short at that point. Unfortunatelly I would never have the chance to find out what was the next thing he was about to say, because I noticed he wanted to continue, if he weren´t interrupted.

When we were saying goodbye at the door, he treated me as an old friend. He simply kissed me on the lips, which utterly shocked me and made me laugh at the same time.

He invited us back to his house to have a little party, but my ex-boyfriend was not in the perfect mood and so we politely declined, which I will forever regret!

About a year after that I bumped into Jim several times in the city where we both lived, or we exchanged text messages whenever I needed to advise what room flowers would be best for our new house. Sometimes I learnt about how he´s doing through my ex-boyfriend, who used to hang out with him and drink few pints in a night bar. Once my ex confessed how Jim told him that I was a great person and he should be happy to have me. They must have been talking about me!!!!

Then I met Jim one night in the nightclub, where he was with his friends. He spent most of his time sitting in the lounge smoking a cigarette, having fun with younger girls. Wherever he was, you heard his laughter. That night my ex-boyfriend arranged for Jim and me to have a dance together.

Jim was just dancing on the dancefloor with some older woman. I remember he had his jumper tied around his waist. I just got onto the dancefloor, he looked at me all serious and pulled me close to him. It was some tediously slow song that I can´t even remember, I just know that we were staggering from side to side like two handiccaped penguins and that made me laugh hysterically.

He was such a clown! Now, however, I consider this moment as one of the most precious memories of him. It was my night.

Back in 2009, I have learned that Jim was diagnosed with cancer. My ex-boyfriend told me how concerned Jim was when informing him. He said, he wept. At that time I didn´t know how serious the situation was and I hoped Jim will get better in no time. I believed the doctors would somehow help him out of it. I saw him a little later at work when he came to our restaurant for breakfast.

I almost served him as another customer, but when I realized it was him, I pulled myself back into the kitchen and let the other girls serve him. He never noticed. I was in such state of shock. I didn´t know what to do, how to act and what to say. He was so thin, just skin and bone. His face was sinking, his eyes full of pain, a small tube leading from his nose to the oxygen device he carried in his backpack and a small canvas hat on his head. I couldn´t believe this was Jim, whom I have remembered being so full of life and joy only half a year ago. I wanted to cry like never before. I also felt embarassed by my own cowardly reaction. I wished more than anything in my life to hug him and say I loved him. I wanted to wish him a happy Christmas. But I was scared of my own tears, which would not help him in his situation.

I wrote him a message on the phone, but he didn´t respond. And then I got the terrible news. Jim died and somehow I also missed his funeral. I took a first taxi and went at least to his months Mass and visited his grave, bringing him daffodils and little white lantern with candle. It was so hard for me. His relatives stood above his grave. I said my prayers in a minute of silence. The air didn´t move and the moon was full in the night sky. It was dark and cold all around but I didn´t care.

I wanted to see him laugh and mess around like he used to. It was as if another star had disappeared and fell to the earth. If only life could last forever.”

2006-2010

Credits to Seraphiel’s blog. Please don’t repost without credits.

[brown-bi-beautiful]

Give Me Some Sugar

Steve Rogers AU

Series Masterlist

Sugardaddy! Steve Rogers x Sugarbaby! Reader.

Summary: When young Y/n gets fired from one of her jobs she struggles to make enough money for college loans and Bills, that’s when she meets Steve. What Steve is looking for isn’t exactly a relationship, he just wants someone to look pretty in his arms and take care of his needs without asking many questions about his job.

Series Warnings: Salty reader, age gap, Sugardaddy, and Sugarbaby relationship and all the chaos that comes with it, SMUT (Obviously. Don’t try to tell me you didn’t see that coming, Karen.), asshole people (Yup that’s a warning.), language more will be added later to the chapters.

Characters (as per the chapter): Y/n (Duh), Steve Rogers (Duh again), Kyle (OMC), Sharon Carter, Wanda Maximoff.

Words: 2.9k

Chapter Warning: Language. That’s pretty much it.

CHAPTER ONE

You were happy. Your life was finally on track. You had two jobs that paid enough for your bills and if you keep working just a few more months and you will be able to pay back all of your college loans with interest. You finally got enough courage to stand up to your asshole boyfriend and broke up with him. And to top it all off it was your 21st birthday. It was the best day of your life right? Wrong. As soon as the words fell from your colleague's mouth that “Ed is calling you to his office.” You knew what it was about. All the smiles drained from your face. He didn’t call you this morning to ask you to take the day shift, he called you to fire you. But you went to his office anyway with that little hope in your heart that maybe, just maybe he was calling you to give you a birthday bonus and not to fire you. But knowing the cheap motherfucker he is, that’s probably not gonna happen.

“Ed, you called?” You asked as you poked your head inside after giving two knocks. You were trying so hard to keep it all together and not to burst out with tears already.

“Y/n.....Hey, first of all, happy birthday.” He said with a smile that didn’t reach his eyes

“So, you remember my birthday?” You asked. Maybe he wasn’t actually going to fire you. You told your inner self to not get her hopes up.

“Yeah, Chloe reminded me when she saw your friend’s post on Instagram.” He said, making it clear that you were not important enough to remember your birthday. “Look I’m not gonna spin my words and make things complicated, I’m just gonna come straight with this OK? I’m sorry to do this on your birthday but the restaurant is not doing as great as it was a few weeks ago.” You wanted to call on his bullshit, you knew the restaurant was doing just fine, even better you would say, but you decided to stay quiet. “It was a hard decision to make.” Again bullshit, he hated your guts for some reason, if anything he jumped on the opportunity to fire you. “We discussed it for a whole week and decided that we have to let you go. Since you are the one who needs this job the least as you already have another one.” So that was the actual reason. 

You wanted to scream at him and throw your shoe at him and insult him and call him an asshole but then you reminded yourself that you were 21 now, You have to act mature. So you just smiled at him and gave him a nod. You have to say he was pretty surprised at your reaction, he didn’t expect you to act so maturely, after all, you were a little famous for throwing tantrums. 

“We’ll miss you,” Chloe added and you gave her a smile, she actually was a pretty sweet girl, you had no idea how did she put up with this asshole.

“I’ll miss you guys too.” You said and walked back to the locker room. You took off the restaurant’s black and purple hideous t-shirt and put on the shirt you wore this morning. “Did he actually fire you?” A voice said behind you and you turn to look at one of your good friends Kyle. As soon as you looked at him a single tear left your eyes. You nodded your head and he wrapped his arms around you. “It’s my birthday.” You sniffed against his chest. 

“I know. Hey, it's okay. You’ll definitely find a better one I promise.” He said with a comfortable tone and stroked your hair. You nodded with a small smile. “What did you say to him?” He asked.

“Nothing, I don’t wanna act like an immature baby and throw tantrums at him. I took it like a big girl.”

“Huh.. now that’s new. How about you be immature just one more time.”  He said and you gave him a confused look. “He’s a big asshole for firing you, you know? Even bigger for doing it on your birthday, so how about you tell him what big of an asshole he is before you go.” He explained and a smirk made its way on your lips. You took your purse and stormed to the middle of the restaurant.

“Hey, Ed.” You called out and everyone turned to look at you when Ed made his way out of his office you started talking again. “You know you’re an asshole right? You’re a jealous asshole who can’t stand his colleagues when they start earning more than him so he fires them on their birthday, but you know what fuck you and your shitty restaurant and I’m gonna find a better job where the boss is not a dick. And stop sending dick pics to your employees you fucking pervert.” His face turned red as you revealed his dirty little secret in front of the whole restaurant. Kyle winked at you as you throw up both of your middle fingers and walked out of the restaurant.

*******

“You actually said that?” Wanda asked as you continued sobbing and nodded your head. “Did he ever send you any?” She asked.

“No, but he d-did to some of my friends.” You said between sobs and rub your nose in the hanky that Wanda gave you.

“Oh my god, is she still crying?” Sharon said as she walked into the apartment and took off her shoe. “I left an hour ago, y/n, you can’t be still crying.” She said and sat beside you. “I can’t help it.” You said between the sobs again. As soon as you left the restaurant you came to the apartment that the two of your best friends shared. And you started crying as soon as Wanda asked you what happened. Sharon instantly volunteered to go out and bring some of your favorite food to calm you down. “Here, I got your favorite ice cream.” She said pulling out a big tub of mint chocolate chip and you instantly stopped crying and pulled her in a bear hug. You have no idea what would you ever do without these two here. 

After the three of you finished the whole tub of ice cream and Three full movies of twilight it was 6 in the evening. You were in a better mood again. 

“I hate that movie,” Wanda stated as she licked the remaining of her bowl. 

“Yeah, me too.” You said snuggling closer to Sharon.

“Yeah, twilight sucks.......why were we watching it again?” Sharon asked.

“Because we like to say we hate it but we love to hate it.” You said and they nodded their head like you made total sense. 

“Ok, Get up, both of you. Get ready. We need to leave at 11.” Sharon said as she pulled away from the comforter from you and Wanda and gestured for you to get up.

“Where are we going?” You asked with a confused eyebrow.

“It’s your 21st birthday and we are not gonna waste it. We’re going to a club and we are gonna look hot and we are gonna drink a lot of alcohol.” Sharon said firmly.

“Sharon I don’t think so, I mean, I just lost my job and-”

“So? you’re gonna get another one. You can’t just sit here like a fucking sloth till then.” She said and Wanda nodded along as both of them stood in front of you with their hands on their hips. 

“I don’t have anything here.” You said.

“Wear something mine.” Wanda suggested and your eyes lit up “Except for the red dress.” She said when she saw your smirk.

“Come on.”

“You can have my whole closet but that dress.”

“But It's my birthday.” You pouted with puppy dog eyes. No one, no one can resist your puppy dog eyes. So that’s why four and half hours later you were standing in front of Wanda’s trailer giving the final touch to your make-up. The said red dress was hugging your every curve like it was tailored specially for you. The hem landed on your mid-thigh, the plunging neckline was showing more than enough amount of your cleavage, the back was made of four strings. She gave you her black pumps which were a little too higher than your usual shoes. Your hairs were curled perfectly by her. Wanda gleamed at you as she admired her work.

“God, you’re gonna turn some head.” Sharon complimented as she walked in and as always she was looking wonderful. She was wearing a dark blue halter neck dress and Wanda was wearing the same dress as yours but in black. 

The cab was in front of their apartment in fifteen minutes. There was no doubt that clubs in New York were great but they were even greater when your friend’s bouncer friend is on door duty so as soon as the three of you arrived, Wanda smiled at the man standing on the gate and he let you in instantly making the people in the long line behind you groan out in frustration.

Sharon pulled both of you to the floor as soon as you entered the club, the music was so loud that you forgot about your shitty day completely. “Shots?” Wanda asked after a song and you nodded. You kept swaying your hips as you reached the bar. “Kamikaze. three each.” You said to the bartender and he started making your drinks with a smile on his face which you could bet was fake.

He lined up the shots in front of you and the three of you took ‘em within ten seconds. “More,” Sharon yelled and he lined up three more. After drinking five shots each, three of you got back to the floor.

After what felt like hours Wanda tucked on your arm and said.  “Look at those guys, they are hot,” Wanda said pointed at a group of businessmen sitting around a table who looked too rich to be here. They were definitely a lot older than the three of you. Your eyes instantly met with the blond man with the bluest eyes you’ve ever seen. He was already looking at you with an unreadable look on his face. “I called dibs on the blonde, He’s hot,” Sharon said as she looked at the said man who was already looking at you. You felt a slight punch of jealousy in your chest as she eyed him up, or maybe it was just the alcohol. 

“Ok, my legs are gonna give out, I’m gonna take a seat,” Sharon said as she moved to the other corner of the club. “Yeah, me too. You coming?”  Wanda asked you and you shook your head, not taking your eyes off the blond man. 

You don’t know what came over you but you bit your lips and started dancing more sensually than you ever did before, your hands roaming over your own body. He looked like he was enjoying the show way too much, you were pretty sure you could see his boner if it wasn’t so dark. He smirked at you as you swayed your hips.

The little bit of conscience that was left in you was telling you to stop it, that it wasn’t you. You were not like this. But you shut it off and kept dancing. Giving him a show.  

A hand tapped on your shoulder and you came to face with a very familiar face and your eyes lit up. “Kyle.” You exclaimed and jumped into his arm. He hugged you tightly and pulled you up from the ground. “What are you doing here?” You asked.

“Sharon invited me.” He replied. Kyle has a crush on Sharon ever since you have introduced the two of them. He made you promise him that you will never tell her anything about it, you have told him so many times to just ask her out but he keeps saying she’s way out of his league. 

“I didn’t know you would want to hang out with three girls on a Saturday night otherwise I would have asked you to come myself.” You said as you leaned into him due to the loud music, his hands were firmly rested on your waist in a friendly manner but it was enough to make the blond man across the room slightly jealous.

“Well, it wasn’t my plan either, I was gonna do some bowling with my brothers but then Sharon called, and you know I can’t say no to that woman.” He said making you laugh. “I’m gonna go say Hi to her and Wanda and then we’re gonna do some shots OK?” He said loudly over the music and you nodded before pushing him where Sharon and Wanda are sitting. 

You turn around to look for your hot stranger again but much to your dismay he was not sitting there anymore. You frowned as your eyes searched the crowd looking for the blond man who has caught your eyes.

“You looking for someone?” said a husky voice behind you as hot breath ran down your spine. You spun around so quickly that you almost lost your balance but before you could fall your stranger stretched his arm and grabbed you by your waist. “Careful, sweetheart, wouldn’t want that beautiful face to have a scratch on it.” He said as he pulled you close to him and started dancing with you. His grip on your waist was hard, it made you wonder how his strong hands would feel on other parts of your body. You subconsciously started grinding on him and he growled in your ear before grabbing a handful of your ass making you moan out at his sudden action. 

In quick action, he turned you around and pulled you to his chest. His hard member was pressed up against your ass and you ground on it. His hands holding your waist roughly. he leaned down to press his lips against your ear and said “That was a nice show you put up for me, does your boyfriend knows you are dancing for a strange man like that?” he asked.

“I don’t have a boyfriend,” you replied as you pressed your head against his chest. God, he was so strong and manly, so different from all the boys you’ve been with. They were just that, boys, but he was a man and you’ve always craved a man.  

“Good, ‘cause once I like something, I hate to share it with someone else.”  He said making your heart flutter. 

“Do you want to get out of here?” You couldn’t help but ask.

“Next time, Doll.” He said as he leaned down to kiss your neck before walking away from you. You turned to see as he walked away from you, his eyes didn’t leave yours till he disappeared into the crowd. Leaving you there, craving for more. Your heart became heavy with disappointment.

But he had said ‘next time. Did he actually mean something by it or was he just letting you down easy, so that the rejection wouldn’t hurt much? But he also said he liked you. Before your mind could overthink the whole situation your friends walked up to you. 

“Where have you been lost, girl. We’ve been calling for you.” Kyle said and you turned to look at the three of them. “Huh?” was all that left your mouth.

“Let’s do more shots,” Wanda yelled over the crowd making you laugh at her enthusiasm. “I’m good you guys go.” You said.

“Partypooper.“ Sharon said.

“You promised me,” Kyle said.

“But-”

“No buts, let’s go.” Sharon dragged you to the bar. After a few more drinks you guys were ready to go home. You pulled out your card to give it to the bartender to pay for the drinks but he shook his head making you frown.

“Your tab’s been paid for.” the bartender told you.

“What? Who paid for it?” 

“A very generous gentleman. I don’t know his name but he was very blond, said he knew you.” The bartender said and you knew exactly who he was talking about. Why would he reject me and then pay for our drinks? You thought.

“Woah Alex has a secret admirer!” Wanda exclaimed making Sharon and Kyle laugh. A blush made its way on your face but you reminded yourself you have to pay him back. You can’t let a random stranger pay for your shit.

“How much he gave you?” You asked.

“A thousand dollars said it would cover you for the night and the rest was a tip.” He said making your eyes wide like a saucer, not just yours your friends’ too.

A thousand fucking dollars!? that’s more than I have in my account right now. how am I supposed to pay him back?

“Woah, he was generous,” said Sharon.

After that Sharon and Wanda took a cab home and Kyle dropped you at your sister’s house where you were leaving. When you got inside Your sister, her husband and their kids were already sleeping. You went to your room as quietly as you can. You quickly took off your dress, did your night routine, and fell on the bed. You couldn’t stop thinking about the blue-eyed stranger the whole night, even as you slept he was on your mind.

*******

CHAPTER TWO

A/N: This chapter was more like a prologue, the main thing starts from the next one. Like if you like the chapter if there’s something you didn’t like feel free to tell me in the comments or in the asks, If you want to be tagged send me and ask.

Taglist:

@godspeedlover​

@captainchrisstan​

@organisationiskey-posts

@literaturefeen​

[marvel-ousnesss]

The pirate and the witch (part one)

Pairing: Harry Hook x daughter of Narissa!reader

Word count: 2477

Summary: Y/N, an orphan VK who was taken to Auradon at a young age, returns to her old home by request of the crown prince. However, things tend to go south at the Isle of the Lost. 

Warning: Mild cursing 

A:/N: Okayy, here goes nothing. This is my first fic and I'm really excited about it. Comments and feedback (and title suggestions 'cause I suck) are appreciated. I think the whole story might have five or six parts which I'll be posting ASAP. 

Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN ANY OF THE DISNEY DESCENDANTS CHARACTERS NOR THE SANDERSON SISTERS. All credit goes to the creators, writers, and producers. Same with the HP charms, credit goes to J.K Rowling. 

Part two       Part three         Part four       Masterlist

I can’t believe I agreed to do this. Of all places, it had to be the Isle of the Lost. I look at the empty sky as I waltz my way through the lonely, and dark alleys; desperately trying to forget that the clock is about to strike midnight. 

Even though I’m currently in one of the scariest places that I can actually think of, I pay attention to every detail as I walk. Particularly, I notice the poor construction of the buildings and the few people that I see asleep against walls or trash containers. Every minute that goes on here makes me wanna go back, yet I’m motivated to help make this a better place — or, at least that's what I tell myself. 

Last week, my friend Ben approached me after a meeting he had with his father. He wouldn’t stop talking about how terrible the conditions at the Isle are and insisting on doing something about it before the preparations for his coronation. So we talked to my parents, the king and queen of Maldonia, and concluded that we needed to see the situation first hand to come up with a good set of solutions. But, given that Ben’s parents would never let him go, I begged mine to allow me, arguing that I could blend in, being a VK myself. 

I grew up in Auradon, and not on the Isle, because my mother died years ago, in another realm. According to Fairy Godmother, she was one of the most dangerous villains ever seen, and one of the evilest. Yet, instead of abandoning my on the Isle, like most would have done, —and after some arguing between royals— the king and queen of Auradon allowed Queen Tiana and King Naveen to raise me as their daughter; but I never forgot the piece of The Isle that runs through my veins. 

By this, I mean my magic. According to my parents, my mother was a very powerful witch. So, when I turned twelve and officially celebrated eight years on Auradon, I asked the king and queen for permission to learn magic; which they granted, under very specific parameters. 

Since my powers have a dark nature, or so says Fairy Godmother, she asked the three forest fairies, Fauna, Flora, and Merryweather, to tutor me at their cottage —this being the only place where I’m allowed to use my powers. 

….. 

I arrive at the small loft —or should I say hideout— that the royal guard of Maldonia had prepared for me, and take off my black cloak, setting it on the bed, right next to the few notes I have taken. Finally, after the longest day that I’ve had in a while, I let myself fall on the firm bed and drift off to sleep. 

Woken up by the sound of my alarm, I get up and get ready, repeating the steps of my plan like my life depended on it —who knows, it may. 

Fairy Godmother warned me about the gang rivalry that has been going on for a while and told me about some VKs who have shown to be the most dangerous. 

The one she talked about the most is Mal, daughter of Maleficent. Apparently, she is the leader of the most feared squad of the Isle; which happens to be formed by none other than the children of Jafar, Cruella de Vil, the evil queen, and well, Maleficent. 

Aside from them, the headmistress mentioned the pirate crew that hangs near the docks, which is the biggest competition for the so-called ‘Core Four’. It’s most known members are Uma, Ursula’s daughter; Gil, son of Gaston; and Harry Hook, Captain Hook’s son (obviously). According to my notes, Uma is the captain and Hook is her loyal first mate. 

I should be fine, as long as I stay away from their little gang battle. But, being as stubborn as I am, I decide that being part of this will be the ultimate Isle experience. 

I do my best to blend in as I stroll down the market and grab a few things, earning a few glares and weird looks as I pay for them. I don’t like being the center of attention, so I put on my hood and avoid all eyes. Preparing to head back, I grab a small bread loaf from a stall to my right and, when the woman behind it is about to protest, I hand her a few gold coins. 

Then, I abandon the market, unaware of the two sets of eyes that I have on my back, those belonging to a certain Arabian young thief and the son of Cruella de Vil. 

I become aware of their steps lurking behind me when I’m a few blocks away from the market, so I walk faster and then I find myself running from them. I manage to keep them quite far until the two of them jump their ways to the ceilings above me. 

I curse Fairy Godmother for not telling me about Carlos’ talent with parkour. She said he was dangerous because of his way with technology, nothing more. Yet, here I am, running from a thief and a thirteen-year-old geek who happens to be a fucking ninja. 

I run and run, without looking up or behind me. I’ve always been pretty active, so I lose them after a few minutes. Nevertheless, I don’t stop running and continue in whatever direction my feet are taking me. 

…… 

I should’ve taken a right. That way, I would’ve arrived at my place ten minutes ago; but my dumb ass decided to take a wrong turn so I ended up in the Sanderson sisters’ hut. And, just before I turned on my heel to make an exit, I find the three awful witches standing right in front of me, displaying wicked and hungry grins.

—What have we here?— inquires the redhead, — seems like today’s our lucky day, sisters. They’re both a teeny tiny bit big, but that’s what you get here. Kids are running out these days. 

I try to run but my feet fail me, and I feel an electric shock running through me before blacking out. The last thing I hear is a chorus of excited voices singing ‘double food delivery, double food delivery,’ and a strong thunder of psychotic laughter. 

I wake up in a small, round cage that hangs from a bronze chain, next to a boy who I recognize as a member of Ursula’s daughter’s pirate crew. What’s his name? Henry, Howard, Helio? Harry, the first mate, that’s it! Anyway, I look around for a possible exit, but find nothing but the front door, which is right next to the cauldron and the three witches —who remain oblivious to me being awake. 

Minutes go by and they remain carried away by whatever they are brewing; at least until my cage mate decides to wake up all grumpy. 

—Hit my nappeer, them howling witches…— he grumbles, trailing off; but it seems enough to draw their attention. 

With wide eyes and wicked grins, they make their way to us with their arms intertwined. When they are close enough, the youngest takes a look at us and licks her lips and the raven-haired one pushes her nose against the bars and sniffs us, sighing in content when she’s had her fill.

— They’re so cute, Winnie, can we keep them, pretty please?— she asks, jumping in her place a couple times. 

—You can play with them until the potion is ready, but not a second more. Do remember, — she sing-songs. — Youth and beauty, beauty and youth. 

—Hear that? We’re gonna have a good time!— States the ebony-haired witch, as she pokes Harry, who’s still semi-conscious, with a wooden stick. That seems to fully wake him 

— Oi, watch it!— he hisses while trying to dodge the harmless, yet annoying tip. He doesn’t have much success due to the lack of space, which amuses me a bit.

—Ooh… a feisty one! — grins the blonde one. —Too bad we can’t keep you, handsome; it would’ve been delicious. 

The look on her face seems to be full of physical hunger, but I detect a not so faint tint of lust in her demeanor. The reason why, with those words and the witch’s obvious intentions, my face contours in disgust, which I immediately regret. 

—What’s your problem, dear one— she says, as she surrounds the cage, — don’t like me talking ‘bout your little boyfriend like that? Didn’t mommy teach you to share?—. When she’s right behind me, she sneaks a bony hand through my hair and grabs a fistful, to which I reply with a groan. 

As she is about to continue the teasing, Winnifred calls her sisters. 

—We can’t feed them the potion yet — she scowls.

—Well, duh… my playtime hasn’t finished— replies the blonde. 

—no, Sarah, were missing the knotgrass, the fluxweed, and the rat foot— clarifies the third sister, with her pointy nose buried in the cauldrons aroma, — it hasn’t turned green yet. 

—At least one of you isn’t completely dense. Come on, sisters, off to the market we go. 

As if on cue, they head to the door and close it behind them.

A faint ‘don’t go anywhere’ is heard from outside, followed by another chorus of wicked laughter. 

…….. 

—Gaunnie hook ‘em— spits the pirate, stretching his arm in a miserable attempt at grabbing the hook that lays on the floor beneath us. 

I shrug, and then proceed to peak my nails, — Might wanna get out of here first, Hooky. 

—Any ideas on how, lassie?— he asks between gritted teeth, growing impatient and tired of failing at hook fishing. 

— A few, actually, but the sight of you in front of me, struggling like that, is quite lovely and entertaining. 

With my comment, his demeanor changes completely, becoming cockier and self-assured. This, although he’s still desperately trying to recover his signature weapon. 

—Then come to the docks with me,— he smirks, as he changes positions to find himself sitting in front of the lock, and begins picking it with a rake that he had inside his left boot, — we’ll get hammered with me crew and, you know, keep the heid. 

As he works,  his nose wrinkles, his brows come together in concentration, and his lips tighten in a thin line. 

 —As tempting as that sounds, I do have things to do.

It would be convenient to go with him. Ben and King did me specific instructions for my little trip, and this would make it easier. However, it just wouldn’t be my type of scene. I feel like I’ve had enough ‘new experiences’ for a few years, maybe.

—Aww, lass, ya hurting my feelings,— he fake pouts and, to no avail, tries to use a different rake. 

 —Feelings? Didn’t see that one coming,— I mock, gently pushing him to the side, and claim my turn with the tricky lock. 

He’s about to complain, but I shush him and close my eyes. Due to the wards placed on the Isle, my magic is significantly weaker than it is on Auradon, but I can concentrate enough to channel it thanks to a locket that the king gave me for emergencies. 

I grin as the cage opens itself, and immediately jump down, followed by my slightly shocked companion. Before he can, I grab the hook by the handle, and point the tip at him, just to swiftly turn it around for him to grab. 

With his hook safely in his hand, he approaches the table and grabs a book, together with what seems to be a shell necklace. Then, he catches up with me outside the front door. We walk in silence for a few blocks, given that there is only one way out, and he breaks the silences that lingered between us. 

—So, you know me name, yet I don’t know yours— he glances at me with curiosity and caution, —ain’t fair, lassie. 

—What can I say, Hook, you are quite famous around here. I, on the other hand, am quite a lone wolf.

—Haven’t given me an answer yet, doll face,

— Name’s Y/N, daughter of queen Narissa.

—Y/N,— he tries it out, —and how come you have magic?

—Let’s say I found a loophole in the barrier. 

—Uma’s gonna love this, — he says, giving me a smirk. 

—Assuming I go with you, that is. I said I had things to do — I quirk a brow at him. 

Before he can reply, we hear three sets of boots approaching us in a rhythmic pattern. It can only be them. 

— Shit, — grumbles the pirate, then he grabs my arm and pulls me behind him and into a dark corner. 

We remain silent as the steps die down, and then continue walking. 

—Now that was close, thanks Harry,— I say, patting his left shoulder. 

—Ya know how to properly thank me, lass,— he shrugs. His cockiness is beginning to become annoying but, to be honest, I cannot say that I don’t enjoy flirting. So, I decided to follow his game. 

—Kind of sad, really,

— Away on, dollface, the hell ya mean by that? 

I give him a sigh and shrug, — I just thought your game was better. Can’t believe that you sway every girl off her feet with a thick accent and a smirk. 

— I did just save yer little witchy ass. You’re a buck eejit if that ain’t impressive. 

— Not a ‘buck eejit’, whatever that shit means. — I chuckle dryly, — I’m just not gonna fall for your oh so great pirate act. 

He shrugs, seemingly unbothered, — same here, doll, mysterious past ‘n shit gets boring real fast.

— Yet, here you are, still following some like a lost puppy. 

Between flirting, bickering, and some laughter in between, we arrive at the corner that connects the docks to the way to my place. 

— As much as I enjoy your gentlemanly antics, time to part ways. 

— You’ll come to the ship tonight, I know it. 

— You know, you’re not even my type, Harry— I claim. 

He is kind of my type, you know? Handsome, witty, cocky, and fun to be with. Not totally boyfriend material, but maybe just for a good time; a rest from Auradon’s Perfect Peachy Prince wannabes. 

Without a second glance, I start walking to the building I slept in but, before I’m out of view, I hear him say,—You do one me one, little witch,— and I grin. 

— See you ‘round, Hook, — I reply over my shoulder. 

[marvinhasadhd]

Okay, so I got my prescription about two weeks ago and since then I have already tried Ritalin a few times.

I started with half a pill (so 5mg) and didn’t feel anything. My doctor advised me to do my next attempt on the next day, but I am chronically bad at listening to medical professionals, so I tried a whole pill (or 10mg) on the afternoon of the same day I tried the first one.

I decided to take it, because our work had been cancelled (I currently work as a security at events which are hosted by our city) and so someone had to wait until the security who worked the night shift arrived. I really need the money, so I volunteered to sit around for a few hours and I decided to take the full pill and try reading for a bit, as thats something where I often struggle with being inattentive and getting distracted by just about everything.

And it kinda helped. I just sat down and read for over an hour without looking at my phone or getting distracted in any other way. I used to read a lot as a child, but since the age of 12-13 I slowly stopped reading as much because I could rarely ever focus on the book for longer times, so reading became a bit frustrating, as I now took days, weeks or sometimes even months to finish books which would have taken me hours when I was younger (one of my biggest achievements as a child was that I finished the whole HarryPotter-Series in just one weekend).

So yeah, that was a nice experience. I tried it again two days later, as I wanted to try studying for university, but this time I tried 1,5 pills (so 15mg) and I didn’t feel much difference to the 10mg. I still couldn’t quite focus on the stuff I had to learn and I kept getting distracted by things around me, especially by the clutter on my desk. I really felt the need to do something about that and so I cleaned my desk. And once my desk was finally free of everything that didn‘t belong there, I cleaned the floor, the kitchen, the bathroom, I did my laundry and I collected all the cat toys and also cleaned all the places my cats like to hang out in of their hair. Once that was done, I tried to learn again and I noticed that I could focus a bit better, but most importantly I noticed that I just managed to keep my focus on doing a cleaning of the whole flat without making any breaks to watch youtube or check twitter or anything. I didn’t even think about my phone, while I did all that. That was kinda crazy, as just about everyone who knows me would describe me as a perfect example of a smartphone-addicted person.

The next day, I tried to learn again and I took two whole pills (aka 20mg or the maximum dosis my doctor allowed me to do before I visit her again) and I noticed that while I could actually focus better, I would also focus very strongly on anything that distracted me. I found one of my cats toys (a self-made mouse) had been ripped and while I was already trying to focus on learning, I just had to get my sewing kit and repair the mouse before I could even think about anything else. So my focus became much better, but also I would focus very strongly on any possible distraction.

The next day my girlfriend arrived and so I didn‘t take Ritalin for a few days, as I know that she isnt too big of a fan of it (that one Netflix-documentary apparently made Ritalin seem like its pure crystal meth) and also I think I shouldn’t need stimulants to be able to focus on my girlfriend. I love her and I always try to give her my fullest attention, so I let the pills in my medicine-cabinet.

Once she was gone again (she has a summer-job in another state, so we only see each other for a few days each week), I tried studying again and so I took two pills in the morning, cleaned my whole learning environment before the effects kicked in and then I actually was able to focus nicely on cell-biology. And ya know, what can I say about that except „The mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell“?

Later that day, when the effects already had worn off, I noticed that I also experienced the so-called rebound effect (=symptoms being a bit stronger than usual once the effects of the medication wore off), but as I wanted to continue studying, I decided to take two more pills. So I went to the bathroom, took one, noticed that I had to clean the cat-toilet, cleaned it, forgot that I had already taken one and took two. So I was at 3 whole pills or 30mg of Methylphenidate, which was 1,5 times the maximum dose my doctor told me to take. And then I remembered that I had made plans with a friend to come over and catch up, as we hadn’t seen each other since the whole pandemic started.

So yeah, once he arrived two hours after my accidental intake of 3 pills, I was really focused on what he said and I must say, I felt a mental clarity I usually never felt in normal situations. I also felt a bit more energetic than usual and I experienced the suppressed appetite (which apparently is a rather common side-effect) much stronger than I did with lower doses. Besides that my head felt very warm and I noticed that my pulse was much stronger, so I put on my old smart-watch, just so I could regularly check my pulse (it was constantly over 90, when my usual average it between 60 and 70). Also I told him about my medication and the dosage I had taken, so if I experienced anything bad (the high pulse made me a bit anxious about that) he could inform a doctor. But yeah, nothing bad happened and for two hours we just talked about a lot of things and I just really listened to what he said, which was nice, as I‘m someone who often gets lost in thought while people talk to me, and being able to focus on what he said without getting distracted made me feel like I managed to be a better friend than I‘m usually am.

But nothing lasts forever and so once the effects wore off (took about 4,5 hours) I really couldn’t focus on stuff and I really felt the effects come back much stronger than they usually are. Luckily he is a pretty understanding dude, so he suggested that we just cook until I felt a bit better, which was quite nice, as my appetite also came back and I remembered that I hadn’t eaten anything that day. So we cooked and just played with the cats until I felt a bit better. I noticed that playing with the cats made me quite a bit calmer - maybe it’s the dopamine-boost my tiny fluffy boys give me, or maybe I just overinterpret something. Idk.

(Short break. I know, this post is already pretty long and as it’s about ADHD, I assume that some people reading this also have it. If you managed to read this that far, I‘m really amazed and I really thank you for your attention. Also I made this another text-style, so if you want to take a short break, you could find this spot easier. If you have any tips on how to write so that it’s more suitable for ADHDers to read, please feel free to send me a message, as I would really like it, if I could improve my writing so that my posts are easier to read for other people. Also I promise that this post will be finished soon.)

Okay, so lets continue: once the friend was gone, I washed the dishes, cuddled the cats and went to sleep. Or at least I tried to do so. I just couldn’t fall asleep. It was really impossible for me to close my eyes without having my brain full of thoughts that would keep me awake. I tried to put in calming music, as that helped me to fall asleep back when I was in school, but that didn’t work. I tried to make myself a nice sleeping-environment by putting on nice sounds to pretend that I‘m on the Hogwarts express (I used ambient-mixer for that) and lit small fairy lights, but that also didn’t help. I tried to do a brain-dump and wrote down all the thoughts that kept me awake, but that also didn’t help much. I tried to read all these thoughts out to my cats and talk about all the feelings I had that were linked to the thoughts, but that also didn’t help. (Also the cats kinda decided to run around and play catch after I talked to them for a few minutes. I think they have about the same attention span as I do). At about 5:30 in the morning my girlfriend texted me because she just got up to go to work and I was still awake to answer her. So yeah, at about 6 in the morning I fell into a very light sleep and I can tell you, working a 7 hour shift after that wasn’t fun. So a nice advice of mine: don’t do a higher dose than your doctor allowed you at 6 in the afternoon. Or generally. Listen to your doctors, chances are they know what they are talking about.

And here’s finally the last experience I wanna write about: Today I woke up at 8 and decided that I will use my day productively to learn. So ensured that my desk and everything around it was nice and clean and then I took two pills. And guess what. Now it’s half past 10 and I spent the last 1,5 hours focusing really intensely on writing a tumblr-post about my experiences with Ritalin because I remembered that I wanted to write such a post and I couldn’t focus on anything else while I had this thought. So yeah. Overall I really like the effects it has on me, as I didn’t experience any bad side-effects by now and it really helps me focus, but now I also know that maybe I should make a check-list of things I want to have done before I take it, as these things could be mayor distractions down the line.

I hope these reports could be interesting or helpful to someone out there, but always remember: the experiences of different people can vary vastly, so always remember that such meds can have very different effects on you or people you know. Always consult a doctor or pharmacist if you have medical questions and always remember that taking meds or not doing so is both completely valid, as long as it fits for you.

If you made it this far, I really wanna thank you for taking the time and focus to read this and I hope you found it to be at least somewhat interesting. Feel free to text me if you want to talk about your own experiences, ask questions, give criticism on the way I write or just ask for pictures of my cats. I hope you have a really nice day and yeah. I‘ll post again once something post-worthy happens or a topic which I think to be deserving of a post comes to my mind.

[tasteslikepepsicola]

Somebody Else (Sodapop Curtis x Reader Part 3)

Part 2 - Please read first

When Steve shows up at her window unexpectedly, Y/N can no longer run away from the decision she has to make.

Word Count: 2,400+

Warnings: mentions of smut, angst

Authors Note: Hey all, sorry this took so long, I’m on vacation this week and it’s been hard to find time to write, but I had a sudden burst of inspiration tonight and managed to finish it. This story is not over yet though, stay tuned for the next couple parts which will hopefully be posted in the next few days. Thank you for all the love on this story <3 I really truly appreciate it so much. Enjoy!

Y/N wakes up to an abrupt loud noise. She sits up, catching her breath.

“Oh, sorry, Y/N, I didn’t mean to wake you. I’m real dumb- I dropped the pan while I was trying to get it out of the cabnit to make breakfast.” Ponyboy explains. He’s standing in the kitchen, flustered, and alone.

“It’s cool,” she tries to rub the sleep out of her eyes. “Where is everyone?” she asks.

“Sodapop was gone when I woke up, Darry left work a little while ago.” he explains.

“But Sodapop doesn’t work on Saturdays, so he didn’t leave a note or anything? Where could he have gone?” Y/N feels a sick feeling rising in her stomach, hangover, and dread. Had Sodapop remembered what he said last night? Was he trying to avoid Y/N by sneaking off before she woke up? Did he no longer mean it?

“No clue, maybe he decided to meet up with Steve or something.” he suggested, though Y/N found this very unlikely. And then it hit her- Oh god, she needed to talk to Steve. But what could she say? How could she justify abandoning him at a party? And with Sodapop, no less. Of course, she could always leave that part out...she could say she felt sick, or-

“Y/N?” Ponyboy interrupted her thoughts. “You alright?” he asks.

“Oh, yeah, sorry- I just- have a lot on my mind, is all.” she reasons.

“Well, are you hungry at all?” Pony offers.

The thought of eating made Y/N’s stomach turn, so she declined. “I actually should be getting home, my mom will start to wonder.” she started to gather her stuff. “Thanks though, and tell Darry thanks for letting me crash. See you around, kid.” she waves goodbye, and is out the door swiftly.

*****

That night, Y/N lies in bed, contemplating the events of the past week. How could everything have changed so suddenly? She probably would have drove herself mad, had she not been interrupted by a few knocks on her window.

Y/N sat up quickly, turning to the window to see Steve. She thought back to all the times she had crawled out that same window to go see him and Soda. Those nights were always the most fun, the ones where she hadn’t told her mom she had left. The thrill of doing something she wasn’t supposed to. It wasn’t like they ever got in real trouble, often opting to grab a few coca-cola's at the local 24-Hour diner. Sometimes they would just sit at the lot and talk. Occasionally Steve would try to convince the group to meet up with Dallas and go to a party, usually at Buck’s, but Soda always declined. And Y/N tried to split her time between them evenly when this happened. Saying she would meet up with Steve at the party, just a little later. That time she spent with Soda, that must have been when she fell in love with him. No one except them knowing where they were, what they were doing, it was quietly and peacefully intimate. 

Tonight, Sodapop wasn’t with him. Y/N was opening the window and inviting him in, not climbing out to join them. 

“Steve? What are you doing here?” Y/N asked.

“I needed to see you. After you left last night, I couldn’t stop thinking about you.” he responds.

“About that- Steve I’m so sorry-” she starts.

“It’s okay, Y/N, I’m not upset. I just wanted to talk to you. Can I come in?”

Suddenly realizing he was still outside, Y/N agreed, quickly moving out of the way so he could climb inside. Realizing she was only wearing a tiny tank top, no bra, and shorts, she shuffled across the room to throw on a sweatshirt. By the time she was done, she turned around to see Steve sitting on her bed, cross legged, fiddling with his thumbs. Y/N sat beside him. 

He sighed, “Are you okay with all this? Am I moving too fast?” Steve turns towards her, looking at her with concern in his eyes. 

“No, Steve, you aren’t doing anything wrong. Everything has been going perfect.” she replies.

“Okay, so, be honest with me, Y/N, is there something holding you back from wanting to make this official?” 

She looks away, a lump forming in her throat. Suddenly, she's lost for words.

“I-” she chokes out.

“It’s Sodapop? Isn’t it?” he asks, defeated.

Y/N isn’t sure what to do, does she deny? Pretend that she's okay, that he’s not on her mind? Or is she honest with Steve, and risk her relationship with him? Let alone their friendship. She thinks for too long, and Steve is already saying something else.

“I- I get it Y/N, I know he’s the one the girls fall in love with. I’m not blind, I have eyes. I know how I look compared to him. I’ve seen the way you look at him. I guess I really was a fool for thinking you could have looked at me like that, too, huh?” he rubs his eyes, and Y/N is sure he’s fighting back tears.

“No.” she says. Y/N grabs his face and holds it between her hands. “Look at me, Steve.” she begs. 

She doesn’t give him much of a choice, so he makes eye contact with her.

“You’re wrong. You’re not second best. You’re not my second choice. I like you, Steve, a lot.”  She tries to convince him.

“Why did you leave with him, Y/N?” the hurt in his voice can no longer be concealed.

Y/N softens her expression. She looks everywhere except at him. 

“I just took him home because he was drunk and wasn’t making any sense and I was worried he would get in trouble- I- you know how he is, he never drinks, and I didn’t want anything to happen to him.” she explains.

“That’s all it was? Truly?” he asks.

“Yes, Steve, that’s it.” she replies.

“And you’re telling me you’ve never thought about him like that?” his posture is defensive, standoffish even.

“Steve-” she starts.

“Y/N, no more lies.” 

“I guess, technically, I did have a thing for him at one point. But that was then and this is now, you’re the one sitting in my bedroom right now. You’re the one who gets to take me to parties, and the movies, and hold my hand, and kiss me.” At this point, she isn’t sure who she is trying to convince. Either way, Steve seems satisfied.

He smirks, “Wanna test that theory?” and leans in for a kiss. And another, and soon enough they are making out.

He trails his kisses down her jawline, and neck, and Y/N finds herself feeling frigid. But Steve is kind, and funny, and willing to lay it all out on the line for her, something Soda could only due drunk.

Steve slowly creeps his hand under her sweatshirt, noting the lack of a bra. She doesn’t stop him. 

The longer they remain kissing, the more aware Y/N becomes that all she can hear is Soda confessing his love for her. She needs to make that stop, she needs to get him out of her mind. 

And when Steve reaches into her shorts, she doesn’t stop him.

*****

Another week goes by, and Y/N sits in bed, alone this time. She’s reading a book she just recently picked up from the used book store, a ten minute walk from her house. The landline phone she has in her room rings, and she instinctively reaches for it without hesitation. 

“Hello?” she waits for a reply.

“Y/N!” a cheerful voice comes through on the other line.

“Sodapop?” she hadn’t been expecting to hear from him, she didn’t know if he would ever talk to her again after their last conversation.

“Hey- how have you been? I haven’t seen you in days.” his voice shakes.

“I wasn’t sure that you wanted to see me.” she replies.

“Well, I do. Can you stop by in say...half an hour? An hour maybe?”

Y/N glimpses at her alarm clock, signaling it was half past ten. She had slept in more than usual, but it was a Saturday, and she didn’t have anywhere to be.

“Yeah, okay. I’ll see you soon.” they exchange polite goodbyes, before hanging up.

Nerves pulse through her as she gets ready. What could he possibly have to say to me? Does he even remember our last conversation? Oh god- I told him I would always love him. Maybe he forgot about that part...he was pretty wasted. How could he have been so casual on the phone otherwise? But why ignore me for a week then?

Nothing seems to add up, but she decides that she is just getting in her head about it, and she makes every attempt to treat this like she would any other day, or any other hang out.

When she arrives at his doorstep, she knocks lightly, and the door is opened almost instantly after.

“Y/N! It is so good to see you.” Sodapop pulls her into a hug, and she hates the electricity she still feels from his touch. Once he finally lets her go he says, “Come in,”

They are the only ones home, from the looks of it. Y/N wonders if he planned that. 

“I haven’t heard from you in ages,” she tells him as they both take a seat in the living room. Y/N sits on the side of the couch that faces Sodapop in the arm chair that Darry typically claims. She is acutely aware that she is seated in the same spot she was the last time she was here, the night everything changed. I wonder if Soda realizes, too.

“I guess I didn’t know what to say.” he stares down at his hands, which are resting in his lap.

“So, you remember that night?” Y/N asks, suddenly feeling her heartbeat quicken intensely.s

“I remember parts, it’s all a little fuzzy. But I think I’ve been able to piece most of it together. And I was hoping you could help me fill in the rest.”

Y/N feels dizzy with anxiety, what does he remember? What do I admit to? What should I deny?

“Okay,” is all she says.

He takes a long, deep breath, his nerves quite apparent. “We can’t avoid it forever, so I might as well just come out and say it. I told you I loved you.” his cheeks heat up in a way Y/N almost never seems them. Sodapop has always been the cool, smooth talking guy. He flirts with every pretty girl he meets, never striking out, always knowing what to say.

Y/N feels relieved that he hasn’t said anything about her saying it back, yet.

“Yeah…” her voice trails off.

“I’m so sorry Y/N, I know I’ve probably ruined everything. And I didn’t want you to-” he starts.

“It’s okay, you were drunk, Soda, you weren’t in your head, it’s alright that you didn’t mean it. People say stupid stuff all the time when they’re drunk. Like that time I told Dallas if he wanted-”

“I didn’t want you to find out that way.” he interrupts, to finish his prior sentence.

Y/N swears her heart stops. The world doesn’t just stop spinning, everything is frozen. This isn’t like last time, now, he knows what he’s saying. She can’t deny that he means what he’s saying anymore.

“You didn’t want me to find out you loved me? Or that you love me?” she hears her heartbeat in her ears as she waits for a reply. The mere seconds between her question and his reply feel like hours.

“Did you mean it?” he asks, not answering her previous question.

“Mean what?” she asks, too overwhelmed to bother protesting about him avoiding her question.

“You told me, always. That you’d love me, always.”

“I could never not love you, Soda, you’re my best friend.” she argues..

“And that's it? You love me like a best friend, always?” he sounds frustrated, especially when he emphasizes the last word.

“Of course I do.”

“And nothing else?”

“Soda-”

“Y/N!” he yells.

“I slept with Steve.” she spits out. Her head hurts, her pulse so loud and pounding in her head, and she feels as if she could pass out. She isn’t sure why she said it. All she can come up with is that she couldn’t let Sodapop love her, when if he knew what she did he would hate her. He deserved more than that. 

He deserves more than me. She tells herself.

Silence takes over the room, and Y/N feels very out of place. Silence had always been a comfortable concept between Soda and her. They had always felt so comfortable in the others presence that they could go hours together without saying anything. But now, the silence is deafening.

“When?” is all he says. He mumbles it weakly, like hes already given up. He avoids making eye contact with her.

“Saturday night, he came to my window and- I wasn’t expecting him at all. But then we started talking about what we were and where we were going, and I guess one thing lead to another.” Her cheeks heat up. “I- I guess it was my messed up way of a distraction.”

He places his head in his hands, rubbing at his eyes, which are now turning red and puffy. Even with his eyes swollen and skin red from fighting tears, he still manages to be the most handsome boy shes ever laid eyes on.

“The night after I told you I loved you?” his voice breaks, and so does Y/N’s heart.

She feels a tear roll down her cheek, and she realizes she has no right to cry, so she quickly wipes it away. “He asked me to be his girlfriend.” 

More silence.

“You know,” he says. “when you told me always, it sounded like the prettiest, most beautiful word in the world. Now it just feels like one big lie.”

By now she can’t prevent the tears from falling, so she lets them, a tiny sob leaving her body when she realizes he’s crying too.

“I didn’t lie.” she tells him.

“Then why are you with him?”

“Because I couldn’t have you.”

[rose-01]

Babysitter

A/n; hey guys, this was originally on my wattpad. I just wanted to post this here.

°•◇•°Gerard’s POV °•◇•°

"GERARD!" I hear my mom yell from the kitchen. I place my pencil down.

"YEA?!" I scream still sitting.

I don’t get a reply so I sigh in annoyance. I walk to the kitchen wondering what she wanted.

"Mom?" I ask as I walk in the kitchen.

She was stirring some mac and cheese. "I need you to take care of Mikey today. Your father and I are going to a parent teacher conference, so we need you to take care of him." She replied while mixing the cheese in to the pasta.

"But mom I already made plans. I was going to hang out with some of my friends."

She looked at me and spoke again. "Oh right. I forgot. You asked yesterday."

She was silent for a few seconds. "I guess I could call a babysitter." 

"Yes!" I first bump the air "Ok have fun. Luckily I found a local babysitter yesterday." I was practically running to my room now getting all of my things to go out with my friends.

"BUT I DON’T NEED A BABYSITTER I’M 14 NOW!" Mikey yelled from the living room. I could imagine his face already probably pouting. I snicker at the thought of him acting like a little child.

°•♡•°Your POV °•♡•°

I finish putting away my home work and grab my comic book ready for a quick break.

I'm sitting down on my bed, halfway through the newest night crawler comic. Then my phone rings. I check the time. I look to my clock on my wall. 5:13. Not too late.

"Hello. Who am I speaking with?" I answer in a fake formal way. I do this now because I placed my number around town for some babysitting jobs. I wanted to buy a new guitar so I was babysitting for some extra money.

"Hi, I'm Donna Way. I was calling because if your babysitting flyer." The woman said she sounded really sweet. "Are you available tonight? I'm so sorry for calling short notice." She finished explaining.

"Umm, yea I'm available tonight." I responded excitedly about getting my 6th call this week. "Oh thank goodness. I thought it was too short notice." She told me with relief in her tone.

"No, it's not a bother." I say trying to still sound formal.

°•♧•° Small Time Skip°•♧•°

Mrs.Way told me told me that she would need me at 6pm.

Its 5:49 when I walk out the door. The house was 2 blocks down so I could get there in a few minutes.

I looked around the street, the ground had some snow left from last night. I walk to the house and admire the scenery. The sky was blue no sight of clouds.

I reach the house she told me to go to. I knock on the door. I wait a few seconds before a boy about my age answers the door. He had brown hair, hazel eyes, and a small pointed nose.

I blush a bit because he was looking at me with saying anything. "Umm, I came to babysit Mikey." I say it with out my voice cracking. Thank god, that would have been embarrassing.

He blinked a few times before responding. "Right. I'm Gerard. He's my younger brother, I'll be out of your hair in a bit. You can come in." He spoke while looking in my eyes. His cheeks had a pinkish tint.

°•●•°Time Skip°•●•°

•°♤°•3rd person POV•°♤•°

It's now about 7:30 PM Gerard had left a long time ago, you and Mikey have been playing d&d for about 2 hour now.

"The spell fell short, your horse is safe for now!" Mikey announces in a menacing voice.

You look at him with squinted eyes. "Oh you're going to get it." You threaten. "I think it's time for me to go all out. I raise my enchanted sword....and lunge forward straight for the dragons heart."

You roll the dice. Mikey and you both hold your breath in anticipation. They land on a total of  20. "HAAAAA! TAKE THAT!!" You scream in victory. "NOOOOO!" Mikey yells in defeat.

"Cough up, Mikey." You speak with your hand extended out to him.

"Ok." He said his head hinging low in defeat. He hands you a Hershey's chocolate bar. You two had made a bet earlier that if you won you would get the last chocolate bar and, if you lost he would keep it.

Since you aren't a bad person you opened the plastic wrap around the bar and handed him the other half. His eyes lit up when you gave him half of the sweet treat. "Thank you!" He squealed out as he ran forward hugging you. You hug him back actually enjoying his company.

"Wanna watch some movies?" You asked him. "Yea. Is that even a question?" He proclaimed making his way to the couch with mouth full of chocolate.

As the movie went on Mikey fell asleep. You took him up to his room. About an hour later Gerard had arrived home. You where leaning against the kitchen counter drinking a glass of water. Gerard had just walked down the stairs.

"Hey, I hope he wasn't too much trouble." He apologized. "No, not at all. He's really cool." You tell him as you place your cup down. He laughs. You feel slightly insecure not sure if there's something on your face.

"What's so funny?" You question with the little courage you have. He looks up at you with his piercing hazel eyes. Some of his hair falling perfectly on his face. "I just never thought such a beautiful girl would call my nerdy brother "cool"."

You blush at his words he just called YOU BEAUTIFUL. Your cheeks heat up. "Well he is, and I would say I'm just average not "beautiful". You speak your mind.

He looks at you like he just saw a dog get kicked. "You are beautiful." You blush hard and look down avoiding his gaze. He steps forward. His finger grazes your cheek. His finger then goes to your chin lifting your head so you look in to his breath taking, hazel, eyes.

"Would you go on a date with me tomorrow after school. I know we haven't talked a lot but, we can go on this date to get to know each other better." He said looking in your eyes. You're heart is practically running a race. Your stomach in knots. How could you say no to his pleading eyes? "Y-yes." You say blushing harder than you ever had.

His face was getting closer. Your breaths mixing together. Your nose now touching. Your heart feeling like it was going to explode. "Gerard?" Mikey asked from the top of the stairs. Your face still red.

You quickly face away from Mikey. You're now facing the kitchen. You grab your glass of water. "Yea, Mikey?" Gerard asked sounding a bit disappointed.

"I thought you where going to stay over at, Brad's house." Mikey said as he maid his way down stairs. "Oh hey, y/n I thought you had left already." Mikey looked at you. Your face still a bit red. You could feel your heart still racing. "I was going to leave but, Gerard and I where talking." You stated. Your heart slowing down.

"Oh, ok. I was just going to get a glass of water. Then I saw Gerard I thought he was by himself. Also mom said that Gerard would give you the money because they had to go stop at Aunt Hilda's house." He explained going in the kitchen. "Oh yea, I forgot." Gerard admitted he ran to his room.

Gerard walked in to his room. He grabbed a peace of paper. He wrote down his number on it. On the back of the small slip of paper read "Xoxo gee, call me." He ran down the stairs he handed you the money.

"I think I should leave now." You said taking it and grabbing your coat. You leave the house before they could say anything. It was dark out so you ran home.

Once you made it home safe you head to your room. You start to change in to you pj's.

You took the money out of your pocket. As you count the money a peace of paper slipped out of the middle. You curiously pick it up. Your brain filled with confusion. You read the paper. A number is written on it. You turn in around and see it was from Gerard. All night all you could think of was your date with Gerard.

[pinkbubbles-and-bigtroubles]

Take A Bow (Girls Talk Boys Part 33)

I know it’s been ages since I updated this fic. I am really stuck on everything else I’m working on, and this was the only thing that clicked. I forgot how much I enjoyed these couples though, and I still have more to tell in this story.

if you’re new to this story you can find earlier chapters HERE

“Ashton,” Cher raised her eyebrows at the man grinning at her across her bedroom. “We're just going to the grocery store, why are you looking in the toy box?”

His only response was to turn back to digging through the box of their assorted sex toys. She could see the light bulb go on over his head,and he opened the drawer where the charging pad and the rechargeable toys were. He winked at her and tossed a necklace her way. Cher caught it and her eyes went wide when she realized it was her collar.

It was a simple black leather choker with a round charm with a paw print on one side, the other just said Kitten. Ashton bought it for her about a month ago and it quickly became a signal he was asserting his dominance.

“This is a bit much for a shopping trip,” Cher rolled her eyes trying to hide her excitement

“Did you just talk back to me?” He narrowed his hazel eyes at her as he walked across the room towards her.

“No daddy,” she pouted, “ just surprised me.”

"I've got the bags in the car, is there anything else you need from the store," Cher asked Camille as she grabbed her keys.

Camille was on the couch tangled up with Calum watching a documentary about volcanoes. She glanced up at her roommate raising her eyebrows when she spotted the collar. In the past few months Ashton had been "caught out" in public with Cher a few times, but the past couple weeks he'd made a point to be spotted with her. Camille knew they both denied their relationship was anything past exclusive friends with benefits, however Camille wondered what Ashton was up to with this public show of affection.

Calum laughed as the door closed behind them, "No telling when those two will get back, if they don't get thrown out for fucking in the produce section."

"Oh God I did not need that visual," Camille shook her head trying to clear it like an Etch a Sketch which made Calum laugh even harder.

In contrast to Ashton's situation, Calum was very much happily committed to Camille. He'd taken counseling sessions to get past his jealousy issues, recognizing that his insecurities were at the root of his behavior. Camille was supportive but let it be known that she wasn't responsible for "fixing" him. Calum wanted to work on his communication issues, and she'd helped him open up and get out of his own head.

Camille finally found the security and strength with Calum to fight her own insecurities. Calum was deeply private and rarely posted on social media. For that Camille was grateful as she didn't think she'd be well received by his fans. Camille was known to be a friend of the band. Publicly she'd been seen with Luke on a couple occasions and at parties with the guys. There had been rumors about Luke which they all found hilarious, but that had simmered down once Luke got a girlfriend.

Camille sighed and Calum tensed up, "what's on your mind darling?"

"Sorry babe, was thinking about making cupcakes for Luke and going to see him tomorrow," Camille rested her head on Calum's chest turning her attention back to the screen.

"Mmmm I'm sure he'd like to see you," Calum murmured not really wanting to agree or disagree. Luke's recent breakup with Summer had been a disaster, with Calum right in the middle. It was a touchy subject with Camille, but Calum didn't want to argue. "You'd just better text them to remind them before they get too distracted."

Cher stopped to read the text from Camille when she felt Ashton come up behind her, his hands on her waist, his body pressing into hers.

"We're in public," she whispered trying to wiggle away.

"So what?" he smirked reaching in his pocket.

Cher gasped as he clicked a button on a remote and the bullet vibrator he'd demanded she wear came buzzing to life.

"Ashton I swear if you make me squirt in this store I will kill you," Cher hissed trying not to moan.

"Say that properly this time," he dug his fingers hard into her hip.

"Please Daddy, I don't wanna make a mess," her voice was low and breathy and Ashton realized he was as turned on as she was.

He clicked off the remote until they got a few aisles over and she was standing next to a couple of ladies perusing the different kinds of pasta sauce.

Click

The two ladies glanced at Cher as she made a weird noise. She grimaced and said "sorry, back spasms."

They nodded and the older lady launched off into a lecture about home remedies and why Western medicine was a scam.

Ashton let her get so close before turning it off again.

When the ladies walked away Cher glared at him before throwing him a wink and walking away.

Ashton cursed under his breath, suddenly finding his pants far too tight.

Cher made sure to get everything on Camille's list and cat stuff despite Ashton's constant distractions. Soon they were headed home Ashton was driving with one hand on the wheel, and the other steadily creeping up her thigh. Cher was playing on her phone pretending to ignore him. He switched on the vibe, first on low wanting to see her react. When she didn't he increased the speed until she was squirming in her seat.

"Please, don't wanna cum yet," she whined earning her a smack on the thigh.

"Cross your legs and not another word," he commanded. She whimpered but she obeyed him and he continued driving. Little moans were escaping the back of her throat and her hips kept bucking despite her trying to keep control.

Ashton pulled over into a parking lot and grabbed a towel from the backseat.

"Pull your dress all the way up to your waist," he told her as he opened her legs.

His fingers were on her heat and combined with the vibe humming furiously her g spot she quickly felt herself toppling over the edge of bliss.

Ashton held the towel up as she gushed for him, her nails digging into his arm as she held herself back from screaming his name.

After Cher gave him a quick blowjob Ashton headed home. Calum and Camille were still on the couch discussing fault lines as Camille explained subduction zones. Cher loved the way Calum watched Camille when she got into what she called her "nerd self." He always seemed interested in whatever history or science topic she was currently into. It helped that Camille could make almost any subject entertaining. Cher almost tripped over the cat carrying groceries to the kitchen. She left out the cake ingredients so that Camille could work on a care package for Luke. Poor Luke, she thought, why does shit like that have to happen to such a nice guy.

Calum perched himself on the edge of the counter watching her cook. She was making red beans and rice with ham for dinner, but before that she had to prepare cold food for tomorrow's lunch. She made potato salad before starting on the chicken and egg salad. Camille hated egg salad but Calum loved it so she made it just for him. She made red velvet cupcakes going out for a smoke and a glass of wine while they were in the oven. Calum pulled her onto his lap stealing the joint from her and taking a puff. He pressed it back to her lips, she took a deep drag making her cough. He felt himself stiffen up as she jiggled against him. His lips found her neck and she melted into him.

They were rudely interrupted by a phone call from Michael to Calum. Luke was crashing with him and Crystal tonight, and being surrounded by three dogs at once had finally cheered Luke up a bit. Michael told Calum that he should come by with Camille the next day. Luke needed to see him, and maybe they could all get past this. Calum knew Luke didn't blame him, but with the hurt and the anger he just needed space away from his friend.

Cher had gone over to Ashton's after dinner wanting to finish what they'd started earlier and not have to be quiet. Camille was trying to find something to watch but Calum wouldn't keep his hands to himself. The commotion woke Duke up and Calum found himself cockblocked by his own dog.

Later that night after they were completely alone Calum was between her legs with her thick thighs slung over his shoulders. He was playing his favorite game "guess what I'm spelling" as he traced letters with his tongue on and through her wetness. After he wrote "I love you" on her skin Camille moaned "I love you too, baby." Calum responded by sliding two fingers inside of her. By the time Camille regained any clear thought she couldn't feel her legs and Calum had gone outside for a cigarette.

Cher saw the orange glow in the darkness before she actually saw Calum. She hadn't really needed to come outside to smoke, Ashton was dead to the world and he didn't mind the smell. She just needed to get out of his space for a minute. She knew going home in the middle of the night would raise too many questions, but she also knew she wouldn't be getting any sleep anyways. Normally Ashton left her satisfied and sleepy, but that was before she found the little box with a diamond ring tucked away in a drawer.

Camille arrived at Luke's door with a basket of sandwiches and goodies with Calum a couple steps behind her. Luke answered, looking tired and sad, but better than he had a week ago. He hugged Camille the way he always did, having to bend down to wrap himself completely around her. Calum was her love, but Luke was her best friend out of the guys, her little peanut.

Three weeks ago the guys had flown to New York City for a quick promo tour. The guys schedule was so insane that most of the girlfriends had stayed home, with Summer and Luke the only couple on the trip. Her boss was a photographer the band was working with for a magazine cover. Nobody questioned it as Summer tagged along on most trips, camera in hand. This trip started off well, but on the second day the two of them were sniping at each other. Luke's relationship had always been up and down, but their relationship had seemed solid until the final night before they were to return to California.

They'd gone out drinking at a karaoke bar. The beginning of the night everyone was cheerful and laughing, but soon things got messy. Summer caught Calum texting on his phone and snatched it away from him. She started playing on his phone dancing away from him when he tried to get it back. Luke was kind of laughing along until she tucked it into her bra and told Calum to "come and get it."

Things got even more awkward when Calum refused and sat there clearly annoyed. Luke got up and tried to get the phone back but she refused.  Whining at him "I want Calum to get it,"  she dodged his hands, pouting the whole time. "Want Calum," she repeated and Luke and Calum both turned red. Summer tried to tuck the phone into her jeans, but she was clumsy drunk and almost dropped it. This allowed Michael to grab it and toss it to Calum. Summer burst into tears and she ran out, with Luke following close behind.

That gave the night a weird vibe, but none of them were in any hurry to return to the hotel. They hung out for a bit, some fans stopped by and chatted for a while. By the time they wandered down to an all night pizza place they all had a decent buzz going and the mood had picked up. They began sending cheesy pick up lines and thirst trap pics to their girls. Calum getting a bit of attention from some girls when he removed his jacket to flex his biceps for Camille while Ashton filmed.

When they got back they heard shouting from Luke's room. Ashton went to check on them, while the other two went to bed. Calum stripped down to his skivvies and crawled into bed hoping the room wouldn't spin. Calum didn't know how long he'd been out when he heard knocking, actually.. banging, on his hotel room door. He threw on a shirt and cracked the door to find Summer standing there in tears.

Calum tried to be kind and invited her in, fumbling for his phone to text Ashton or Luke, he wasn't sure which. Next thing he knew Summer had thrown herself at him, wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him anywhere her lips could find. Stunned Calum tried to back away, that turned out to be a mistake as the bed hit the back of his knees and he fell back. They both tumbled backwards with her on top of him. Now she was tugging at his shirt and his waistband talking a mile a minute, "I feel horrible but I told Luke I wasn't in love with him. That I wanted someone else. I've been in love with you, Calum, for ages now. I love you so much, you just don't understand," Calum pushed her off of him and jumped off the bed.

"Wait, Calum, baby, pretty please," she was desperate and grabbed his hand. "I need you, I can treat you better. I'm not boring and I'm better looking."

"Enough," Calum shouted, startling her into silence. "This is not happening. You need to leave." He texted Ashton, afraid to talk to Luke at that moment. Calum had no idea what kind of nonsense she'd said to Luke,or how bad this was going to be.

He headed for the door when Summer ran in front of him, "please just stay with me tonight. You can have me any way you want. I'll do anything you ask, just please don't go." Calum was not impressed by this offer.

There was a knock and Calum had to find a way to open it without physically shoving her aside. He found Michael, their manager and the hotel concierge standing in the hallway.

The concierge wrapped his arm around Summer's shoulders leading her away with a gentle manner and absolute authority. Their manager told them he'd see she got another room for the night and a different flight home.

After they left Mikey informed Calum that Ashton was with Luke, who was completely devastated and quite drunk. Summer had broken up with Luke and while they were fighting confessed that she'd been in love with Calum the whole time. The flight home was awkward, everyone was tired and on edge. Calum was relieved that Camille had taken everything so well. Not that she wasn't furious and ready to "slap the shit out of that green eyed demon whore," but she wasn't mad at him.

Luke was a different story. He wasn't angry, but kept his distance from Cal. He told Camille it hurt to think of being with her and the whole time she was into Calum. Camille set up a little picnic on Luke's living room floor , settling in between the two guys. Petunia sprawled out next to Luke, Miss P hadn't left his side since he got home. Camille kept the conversation flowing, asking them questions about the new music they were recording, and the trip Luke and Ashton were taking back to Australia for a couple weeks. The guys started to relax and chat a bit.

Luke stopped, sighed and began, "Listen, Cal….I need to apologise."

Calum cut him off, "Mate there's no need for that, I get it."

Luke nodded and pushed his plate away, but Camille noticed he'd eaten two sandwiches and a cupcake. That was progress.

"It's weird how once the bubble pops you see all the warning signs, and little shit you overlooked before because you wanted to make it work," Luke mused.

"I personally found her tiresome and I think her work is overrated," Camille rolled her eyes.

Her phone rang and Camille snatched it up thinking it must be work, everyone else texts.

She frowned when she saw it was the security desk at the front gate.

"Sorry to bother you Miss Camille," she recognized Dale the security guards voice. "We have a man here insisting on being let in," he paused his voice muffled as he spoke to the person he was calling about. "Claims he has legal documents for Miss Cher."

Camille shivered as a chill swept over her, "what's his name?"

Muffled voices and Camille heard "Barett," and she interrupted "Dale, did you say Benjamin Barett?"

"Yes ma'am," he replied.

"I'm on my way right now," Camille hit end and leapt up startling both guys and dogs.

Calum scrambled to his feet, "What's going on? Who's here? I'm coming with you."

Camille shook her head,"you can't, he's gonna be an asshole to me and I don't need you cracking his jaw."

"WHO?" both Luke and Calum all but shouted question at her.

"Cher's husband, he's tracked her down," Camille answered.

@wildhearthood @babygirlcashton @kiiiimberlyriiiicker1995 @vfdsstuff @unabashedlymyself @5sos-ficssmut @rosettesofhappiness

[rhina988]

The Family Encounter  -Ashley comes to L.A.-

Read The Family Encounter pt.1

“No, no, turn the bed the other way, I want the morning sunlight to hit right at the middle,” I said to the delivery guys who dropped down a bed for Ashley. Her room was almost done, and she was supposed to arrive in a month. Little did I know, she never shares her plans with her parents. 

The phone rang and I answered without looking at my display, “Yes? Who is this”, I asked as I monitored over the delivery men.. 

“Well, finally old man,” a female voice said from the other side of the line. 

“Ashley? Is that you?” I asked in shock. 

“Yes father,” she said giggling, “It is I, your beloved daughter.” 

“Hey, how are you? How come you finally remembered to call your old man?”  

“Ummm I can’t really come to you unless I know the address, right?” she asked and I could tell she was rolling her eyes at me. Her mother’s voice went the same way when she was rolling her eyes. 

“Okay, enough with the attitude, young lady,” I said matter-of-factly, “I’ll e-mail you the address and the other details in a few days,” I said and continued to point the delivery guys where to turn the dresser to. 

“A few days? Do you want your 17-year-old daughter to spend days at the airport or roaming the streets of L.A.?” 

Coming around from explaining the guys where to put the furniture, I stopped and said, “Wait. Say that again.” 

“Dude, I’m on the plain, and will be landing at LAX in like an hour or so,” Ashley said and I felt a wave of anger mixed with fear washing all over me.

“What?! What do you mean…? And when, exactly, were you going to notify me about that? Does your mother even know…?” 

“Chill Jared, she knows. I convinced her not to tell you anything because I promised to call you on my own, which I kinda gave up on and decided to surprise you. Well, surprise!” 

“I guess your mother forgot to mention I’m not a big fan of surprises. I need things planned out and your room isn’t even… ugh…” I stopped talking for a second taking a deep breath. I was actually excited to see her, and I realized I need to make her feel welcome at her father’s house. It’s her home as well.  

“I get to have my own room?” Ashley asked with a bit of joy in her voice. 

“Of course, sweetie, but it’s not completely ready yet. Anyway, I’ll send someone to pick you up at the airport. See you soon.” 

“Okay, see ya.” 

I crossed my arms over my chest, starting to take deep breaths, before I told the delivery guys to leave. They were confused, to say the least, but I had no idea what to do next. Suddenly, nothing was going according to plan, and this little surprise was enough for me to know that life with Ashley is going to be anything but easy. She’s obviously picked up the worst of her mother and me, along with some of our best traits. Ashley was starting to look more and more like Brooke, but her character resembled mine in so many ways. I was starting to feel insecure of my own abilities to parent a teenager. She was practically an adult, and I was suddenly supposed to be an authoritative figure. After sorting my thoughts out, I sent a driver to pick Ashley up at the airport.  

“Okay, this traffic is ridiculous,” Shannon walked inside the living room at one moment clearly irritated with life in L.A. “If they don’t come up with something we could fly instead of driving the road, I’m gonna lose my mind,” he said plopping on the couch next to me. 

“You mean like a plain, helicopter, a paraglider?” I asked not looking away from the spot I found on the floor. 

“Oh right. Well, we need a helicopter, ASAP,” he said expecting a feedback from me, which he never got. “Are you feeling okay?” he asked putting his hand on my shoulder, realizing I wasn’t feeling my best. 

“Ashley is coming,” I said, still looking at the spot, barely even blinking. 

“I know, in a month, right?” he said noticing my palms were sweating as I was crossing my fingers so I could lean my chin against my hands.  

“Nope, she’s coming today,” I said with a low voice, feeling Shannon standing up from the couch. 

“Today? How? I mean why haven’t you …” 

“Told you?” I said getting up from the couch and heading to the kitchen, “because she called an hour ago to notify me.” 

Walking behind me Shannon was confused, but I could tell he was trying not to be too obvious, because he assumed I was pretty shocked myself. 

“Aren’t you supposed to pick her up?” 

“And risk getting out picture taken, having a series of gossip claiming I’m dating a teenager and possibly getting married for the 100th time? Not hanks! Plus, I need some time to clear my thoughts,” I said in a matter of seconds, feeling incredibly agitated. 

“So, how are you feeling? Are you ready …. Ummm for … you know?” 

“To be a father?” I said and he nodded giggling, “Yeah, I was supposed to be ready for that 17 years ago. And let me tell you something, nothing prepares you for the delivery, and nothing prepares you for this either. It’s like seeing her for the first time all over again. Except this time, I won’t have Brooke to make me chill,” I said pouring water to a glass. I was parched all of a sudden, and I managed to chug an entire glass of water in one take. 

“Man, you’re nervous!” Shannon said obviously shocked at what he just saw. 

“You think?” I asked ironically. 

“Now that I think about it, I haven’t seen Ashley in a loooong time. She must be a spitting image of her mother, huh?” asked Shannon. 

“Yes, she’s beautiful. But the character… man, she’s going to be a handful,” I said exhaling in fear. 

“No worries, bro, you have me. Brooke may not be here, but the two of us are definitely going to be able to deal with teenager’s tantrums”. 

The second he finished that sentence, Ashley made an entrance into the living room. 

“The daughter has arrived! Happy to see me?" she asked tilting her head, while chewing gum. Her outlandish outfit and such a vibrant hair color left Shannon in awe, while I needed a few moments to pick myself together too. 

Throwing her backpack on the sofa, she started walking around the house, not even allowing us to respond. “Nice driver. Couldn’t pick me up yourself rock star?” she asked as the driver walked inside bringing in her suitcase. I nodded to him instead of saying Thank you, as Ashley starting to look through the house.

“Wow, this place is huge. I can already see it’s going to be a lot of fun. And that pool outside, nice!” Ashley said, as Shannon and I just looked at each other, knowing this parenting thing isn’t gonna be easy. 

I took my cell phone to call Brooke and let her know Ashley has arrived, while Shannon was trying to introduce himself to his niece. 

“Hey kiddo, I’m Shannon, your cool uncle,” I heard him saying, which made me giggle instantly. You can’t say to a girl that you’re her cool uncle. He’s so going to pay for that. 

“Okay, if you say so,” Ashley said with a chuckle, and continued to walk through the house, as she took out a cigarette about to light it up. I was following her and Shannon, waiting for Brooke to pick up.  

“Yes?” she finally answered. 

“Hi, Brooke, it’s Jared.” 

“She’s there, huh?” she said with a sigh. 

“Yes, Ashley is here, and thanks for the heads up,” I said sarcastically. 

“I know I should’ve informed you about it, but you’ll see that when Ashley has something on her mind, she’ll get it, no matter what,” Brooke said and I knew she meant that in a bad way, alluding it was my genes that Ashley is carrying.  

“Btw, does she always dress like this?” I asked curiously? 

“Leather pants and a net shirt?” 

“Mhmmm.” 

“Yes, that’s one of her favorites,” said Brooke with a sigh. 

“Good to know,” I replied, not really knowing what else to say, and I wanted to tell her so much. “Also, does she actually smoke?” I asked in disgust looking at Ashley still holding a cigarette in her hand.

“She does a lot of things, and you’ll just have to deal with it, Jared” Brooke said before making a short pause, only to finish, “Okay, I have to go now, and good luck, Jared. You’re going to need it”. 

“So, where are you taking me,“ I heard Ashley asking Shannon, as I was about to enter the room they were in. 

Ashley already plopped on her bed, looking around the room, with the most annoying but kinda cute gum chewing and bubble popping. Until she took the gum out, glued it to the bed post and lighted up the cigarette. Shannon looked at me, looking at Ashley not knowing how to react. 

“You do not smoke …" I paused as she looked at me almost laughing at my face, “around the house,” I said trying to be less strict but still set some ground rules. “You can go outside, by the pool or wherever. But not inside.” 

“Fine, bossy boots,” Ashley said getting out of bed and walking to the dresser to put out a cigarette on it. 

“Where do you want to go?” I asked, leaning against the door frame and crossing my arms over my chest, trying not to freak out at what she just did.

“I don’t know, it’s my first time here. I wanna see everything,” she said and reminded me of myself when I was her age, “you know, pubs, night clubs, tattoo parlors. I really want to get a tattoo.” She said looking at all of my tattoos. The one thing I was hoping she’d never ask me.

“You’re not old enough to go to a club, missy,” I said as she passed by me heading to the studio. 

“ I am if I have a chaperone, “ Ashley answered not caring at all about what I just said. Shannon and I followed her, both terrified at how we’d be able to control this little rascal.

“Look, we can take you anywhere but the place where we could actually be seen by so many people who’s first thought would be that you and I or you and Shannon are ... you know,” I tried to explain as she sat behind the drums and started banging the drumsticks against the instrument. That was just the right way to Shannon’s heart.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa! No banging,” Shannon almost snapped at Ashley as she started going all crazy around the drums. 

“Well, I’m not taking No for an answer. So, it’s either one club, or the drums get it,” Ashley answered and I knew she wasn’t kidding. 

“You don’t make the rules, Ashley, we do,” I said approaching her, and looking her deep into her eyes. This was it. I had only one chance to stand up to her and show her who’s the boss, or she’d make our lives a living hell and think she could wrap me around her finger. I wasn’t about to make the same mistake her mother did.

“Oh really,” she asked, raising her eyebrow.

“Yes. And what we say, goes! So, there will be no clubs, but only places where a girl your age can go,“ I said taking the drumsticks and giving them to Shannon.

She was quiet for a second before she said, “You got spine. I like that.”

Standing up she headed to kitchen where we all had an early lunch before Ashley went to take a nap in her room. I took the free time to think about everything, as I was very much surprised at how Ashley reacted to me being authoritative. I expected her to freak out and go all nuts, but she was incredibly tranquil. From my own experience I knew that couldn’t be good. It was probably just a calm before the storm.

Shannon and I tried to make Ashley feel welcome, but little did we know she wasn’t so easy to please. After all the sights we’ve showed her, and places we took her to, none of it made her really excited and happy, so we were out of ideas for a moment. Suddenly, one evening when we were going to have a movie night with a lot of popcorn and junk food, Ashley came to a surprising idea. 

“So, I know you’re having a short hiatus from your tour these few weeks, but would it be too crazy if I went along with you on your next show?” Ashley just blurred it out of nowhere, making me almost choke on popcorn. 

Shannon just looked at me curiously, and I knew he wanted to say yes, but my response was the most relevant.  

“I don’t think your mother would be okay with that,” I said trying to avoid rejecting her. I didn’t want to be the father who denied anything to his child, but I honestly didn’t think Brooke would approve, so I went with that option. 

“Mom is not the boss of me,” Ashley snapped. 

“She is until you’re 21,” I said. 

“18 in Europe,” she backtalked again. 

“You’re in the US now, young lady, and you’re not of age until you’re 21. End of story,” I said, trying to make her forget about the subject.

“Whatever, old man. So, if she says no, it’s a no? You don’t get to have any say in this?” Ashley asked, making me feel nervous. 

“I don’t think my opinion will ever count, Ash. I wasn’t around long enough to have any saying in the big decisions,” I was trying to lessen the blow, but my heart ached nevertheless. 

“But what if you insisted on having a say?” 

“What do you mean?”, boy, she was definitely my daughter. Persistent as ever. 

“Like, mom had to raise me for the first 17 years, and now for a few months you get to be the parent in charge,” she said snacking on popcorn, making Shannon smirk and giggle for a second. 

“I would love that, honey, don’t get me wrong, but your mom still needs to approve of all that.” 

“So, let’s call her,” she said grabbing her phone. 

“Whoa, whoa, time difference,” I said stopping her. 

“It’s 6 am there, she’s totally up by now,” Ashley said nonchalantly and already dialed the number. 

My palms started sweating, heart palpitating and I knew this was not going to be a pleasant conversation. 

“Hey, m…” suddenly Ashley paused and started rolling her eyes, “I’m fine, relax. Can I talk now? Thank you. Jared and I were just talking and we were wondering if you’d mind me going on tour with him and Shan?” 

The anticipation building, the anxiety rising through the roof, I was so afraid of Brooke’s answer all of a sudden. If she approved, I would be faced with a teenager on tour, having to worry about her aside from all the other stuff. If she didn’t approve, I would be faced with a devastated teenager likely to throw tantrums at me, and God knows what else. Or maybe just say To hell with it and make me say YES no matter what. Having a child was no picnic! 

“Aha, … aha… I know, but I really want to spend more time with them, experience all that on the road extravaganza. Don’t I deserve that?” Ashley was surprisingly calm and by the look of her face persuasive, because the corner of her lips curved up within seconds. 

Coming towards me, she handed me the phone saying, “She wants to talk to you.” 

Taking a deep breath, I took the phone and said, “I really hope you’re not going to yell at me. And good morning by the way.” 

“Is this your way of having fun? How could you even think I would allow her to travel with you all across the world?” Brooke was angry and apparently just got out of bed, judging by the sound of her voice. 

“Okay, first of all, going on tour wasn’t my idea,” I spoke in low voice heading towards the office, so Ashley wouldn’t hear the entire conversation, even though I figured she would eavesdrop anyway. “Second of all, I do not think it’d fun to torment you, and I’s much rather have you here with us so you can at least try to control her, because parenting a teenager is 10 times worse than what I’ve heard it was supposed to be like.” I was now done, and after a long exhale I was gonna say something else when Brooke interrupted me. 

“I understand that you want to spend more time with her, but going on tour is not something a teenager should do, Jared”, Brooke was persistent, but for some reason I really wanted to make Ashley happy and let her come to the tour. I mean, I was still her father, if anyone could be authoritative I could. 

“Haven’t you heard of Justin Bieber?” I said with a smirk,”Soon, only teenagers will be on tour. Performing, nonetheless. Look, you’ve had her for 17 years, now it’s my time to take care of her, and you’ll just have to trust me.”  

After a few seconds of silence and what I could clearly hear as a nervous breathing, Brooke said, “All right. But if you don’t make sure she’s always safe, Jared I swear to God…” 

“I will. Don’t worry. Thank you,” I said, and after a soft Okay, the conversation was over.  

Coming back to the living room I saw Ashley and Shannon giggling about God knows what. Seeing me approaching the sofa, Ashley jumped on it in anticipation. Her look said Tell us already, tell us already. And I couldn’t resist but making her wait for just a little while. 

“I’m afraid…” as I paused Ashley rolled her eyes and was about to start yelling when I continued, “you’re gonna have to put up with your old man for the next few months.” 

With the loudest scream I have ever heard in my life Ashley started running around the room, only to rush towards me and jump into my arms. “ Thank you, thank you, thank you!” she said kissing my cheek and hugging me so tightly I thought I was gonna lose my breath. Both excitement and fear washed over me, as I realized what I was going to put myself through. 

“Well, I guess you’re finally gonna see your old man rock from backstage,” Shannon was trying to be funny.  

“I cannot wait,” Ashley said ecstatically, jumping out of my arms.  

We were supposed to continue the tour in a week, and those seven days went by so fast, it felt like only one day. In the meantime, we managed to decorate Ashley’s room the way she wanted it, which was completely the opposite of what I had envisioned for her. But then again, she was anything but a regular teenager. Not that it’s any wonder, she was my daughter after all.

“Everybody ready?” I asked before Emma, Shannon, Ashley and I went inside the tour bus. The rest of the crew was already inside, and the little miss daughter didn’t feel like hanging up her phone, and was delaying our departure. “Could you please hang up, so we can have a talk on the bus?” I asked before she scolded me with her look. The same one her mother has. 

“So anyway…” she continued, entering the bus, which made me completely lose my mind.  

Following her, I snatched the phone out of her hand saying so I could hang up.  

“Hey! I was talking,” she said with an attitude, and I just raised my eyebrow, widening my eyes at her.  

“My bus, my rules! Apparently, you need more control than you needed at home. When I ask you something nicely, you listen to me and do as I say.” Just as she started rolling her eyes I said, “and enough with that attitude”. 

I followed her up in the bus when I saw her smirking which really quickly went straight to a huge smile. As I climbed up in the bus, I saw a boy not much older than Ashley, sitting on the bus. Grabbing Emma by the shoulder I asked, “Who is that?” as I could see Ashley tossing her hair and leaning towards the boy.  

“That’s my nephew. Scot? Remember, I asked you if he could come along and help us out, learn the ropes. He wants to be a musician, his parents thought that once he sees how exhausting tours are, he’ll just give up.”  

As both Ashley and Scot started giggling, I could feel the blood in my veins boiling to a melting point. The next minute Scot’s hand was touching Ashley’s hand, and the second she scooted over next to him and started leaning towards, she gave him that well-known irresistibly flirty smile she inherited from her mother. That’s when I knew this boy was gonna be trouble, and I had no intention of letting him and Ashley get closer than they should.

To Be Continued...

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@letonistaaaa @msroxyblog @iraniq @patiletoproblems @jaredsechelon09 

[neverwatchedonepiece]

538-539: "The Straw Hats Defeated?! Hordy Gains Control of the Rygu Palace!" and "The Haunting Ties! Nami and the Fish-Man Pirates!"

Neptune’s finely tuned Roid-dar in action.

Finally figured out what was wrong with Chrome, so it’s business as usual. (FYI, it was the antivirus SSL scanning feature conflicting with certain websites’ certificates. Not great that I have to turn it off for browsers to function but that is a rant for another blog.)

On the Fishman Island arc front, 539 was the episode I’d been waiting for. I don’t have all the story yet but I know it’s coming. I’m excited to see what Oda does with Queen Otohime and Fisher Tiger’s stories. I also wanted to talk about Nami this post and I finally have the chance because she’s already at the Sea Forest and has met Jimbei (more on that later).

[title]

A Fishman Captain who can’t beat a human in a fight underwater without resorting to performance enhancing Fish Roids can’t amount to much, either. 

Just a thought.

Must say the spoileriffic title for 538 was unexpected. I honestly thought Zoro would win, or at least force a stalemate so that he could hold back the invasion with Usopp and Brook. Nope. Oda has diverted the plot in a direction I did not predict. Now I’m wondering how Neptune will retake the palace. I’m thinking a concerted effort, with the royal guard, maybe some citizens, plus reunited Strawhats out in force. Mainly so the Strawhats can clear their name because right now, the locals still believe they’re responsible for storming the palace and kidnapping Shirahoshi.

There was some good tension sustained when Zoro was fighting underwater and knew he had to surface to breathe. He defeated Hordy but was grabbed by a bunch of Hordy’s Roided Goons. When I was a kid, I remember playing Sonic the Hedgehog. There was nothing like that dread when Sonic was underwater and the oxygen countdown started. Find a bubble or else! Even though I knew Zoro’s plot shield would hold, I still felt that tension. xD For a moment, I was annoyed that Usopp didn’t go help him but then I realised Usopp was the only thing stopping Brook from sinking like a stone.

Neptune was great. I like the guy now. Compared to Hordy Jones, he’s an excellent leader. I brought up before his tendency to take advice, to listen to his people and consider their opinions even if he weighs them up and decides to do something else. In 537, it was obvious that Neptune cares about his people. He realised the Fish roids could be a real threat to his people’s safety. Instead of saving face, instead of a “we shall defend this palace to the death!” attitude that only gets people killed, Neptune only considered getting everyone out safely, and used his strength to secure an escape route: sacrificing himself in the process.

When his men did escape, they immediately thought of Neptune, of how he had helped them. They wanted to help Neptune because of everything he had done for them.

Compare that to Hordy “Become my Meat Shield or Die” Jones. He rules by fear and thinks of his dispensable soldiers in terms of what they can do for him.

It’s clear who the best king here is.

Must admit, though. Hordy Jones is organised. He instructed his head goons to assemble raiding parties to invade different districts of Mermaid Cove. Waterwheel Town, Candy Factory Town, Fishverly Hills, and other places I didn’t catch are under the control of Hordy Jones. His Head Goons wasted no time forcing the new regime and the new ideals on the locals, forcing them to commit a highly-charged political act of disrespect: step on an image of Queen Otohime or die. 

Naturally, Fukaboshi was fuming when he found out what was going on. That was his mother. Not cool. (I am hopeful he will lead the counterattack. I bet he’ll succeed Neptune some day.)

I’m also wondering about Big Mom. Candy Factory Town has fallen to Hordy Jones. If the tribues stop pouring in from Fishman Island, would she send someone to see what’s going on and kick Hordy’s ass herself? I mean, sure, the Roids make him strong, but this is a Yonkou were talking about here.

And Brook is a potential wild card here too. When Neptune, Zoro and Usopp were captured, Hordy’s Goons dismissed Brook. “What’s that skeleton doing here?” “Dunno.” I wonder if Brook will do a Sanji and complete the stealth missions this arc?

Jimbei’s Glorious Reaction Face

LUFFY-KUN, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?

Watching Jimbei unravel like that was hilarious. It’s always funnier when the stoic characters crack. Only Luffy could stress someone out that much. And we got two in a row when he realised Hachi was there too. Chopper should start running blood pressure clinics for those suffering Strawhat-induced stress.

The object of Jimbei’s stress was that Luffy had appeared with Princess Shirahoshi in tow. Jimbei knew all the crap she had been through (I wonder if he tried to stop it before but couldn’t find Decken?). He also knew how unsafe it was for her to be outside. Just as he said this to Luffy, a random axe whirred through the air and Luffy deflected it.

I admire Luffy’s unwavering confidence that he can protect Shirahoshi (“She knows I’ve got her back!”) and I love that he did take her to the Sea Forest to pray at her mother’s grave (that was sad) but it is bloody dangerous, you’ve got to admit. Jimbei said the harrassment started after Queen Otohime’s death so poor Shirahosi couldn’t even attend her mother’s funeral (I need someone to kick that guy’s ass ASAP. Do not care who it is now.) What if Luffy suddenly has his hands full? Maybe Sanji will step in and fend off Decken, now that he’s back to normal, thank god. I guess the most effective treatment for Sanji’s weakness is immersion therapy.

The lack of message to Luffy is also suspicious. Why did Jimbei’s message not get through? Someone is intercepting communication. I wonder if Hordy is behind this too. Maybe he doesn’t want the peaceable but powerful Jimbei ruining his plans.

Den-san wondered what all the commotion was and shouted out from Sunny’s deck (and Franky had his “My captain is a dumbass” moment). Not long after, Nami and Camie arrived.

I liked that Oda assembled those three Merfolk and Fishmen together because they were able to represent different voices from Fishmen Island. It wasnt’ just one person speaking for their history. All of them had a voice.

Including a human who had been affected by the violent repercussions of Fishman Island’s brutal history.

Nami and Fishman History

I have been wanting to write about Nami for ages. After I finished the last post, I started thinking about Hordy and what he would think of Nami if he found out about her. I guessed he would hate her for betraying Arlong and would want revenge. It’s funny, but Hordy made the same mistake with Nami as Arlong did. He underestimated her. When she left with Camie, Hordy’s goons did tell him, but he dismissed the warning. Let them go. It doesn’t matter.

Now, I wonder if history will repeat itself. Nami has escaped, has told Luffy what’s going on and soon they will have the power to regroup, counterattack and re-take the palace. I doubt they will ever fix the relationships between humans and Fishfolk. But maybe they could be a symbol of improvement, if nothing else.

Nami’s reaction to Jimbei in the last episode was telling. Something was up there, I was certain of it. Again, in 538, she was indifferent to the point of wariness when she spoke to him. Camie was full of admiration. Nami was guarded. She also wanted to skip straight to the point and halted Sanji’s fool antics in their tracks because she had a bone to pick with Jimbei.

I had been thinking about Jimbei and how he might be related to all the troubles in Fishman Island.

I had no idea he was the one who set Arlong on the rampage in East Blue.

Nami must have known something. Maybe she heard Arlong talking about Jimbei. Maybe Arlong told stories about the Sun Pirates and Jimbei’s name came up.

Jimbei did apologise. He said he was grateful for the Strawhats stopping Arlong wreaking further havoc in East Blue. But for Nami - and Sanji for that matter (I am so glad the daft behaviour has stopped. I like Sanji best when he’s being serious) - the apology wasn’t quite enough.

Sanji remembered was Yosaku told them about JImbei (I would totally have forgot about this if not for the flashback). In exchange for joining the Shichibukai, he set Arlong loose. Still not sure exactly what that means. Did Jimbei say, “Right, Arlong, go get those stinky humans” or did he have to cut the extremist Arlong loose so he could ascend to an official government role and not be tainted be association?

Sanji was cool here. “If you wanna make excuses, fine,” he said. “But Nami here had her home taken over by Arlong and went through hell. Depending on what you say, I might not forgive you.”

Which is fair enough, actually. No one is obliged to forgive anyone.

Nami told her story. She also said that travelling to Sabaody Park and finding out about how awfully Fishmen are treated would never change the way she feels about Arlong, but now she understands why he thought that way.

That is hugely generous of her, honestly. Considering the way Nami was treated by Arlong, to even feel the tiniest shred of understanding for his motives is remarkable. She saw how Camie and Hachi were treated and I think it was a real eye-opener for her. One that she’d never forget

Then the story of Fishman Island was told by three Fishmen who had lived through the worst of its history, Jimbei, Hachi and Den-san.

Nami mentioned that Arlong Park looked exactly like Sabaody Park. Hachi said that when they were little, they yearned for what the human world had. That shot above is like poor street kids looking over a wall into a gated community and longing for the tiniest portion of what the rich people have. 

But when they grew up, they hurt so many humans, Hachi said. He heard that, long ago, Fishmen and Merfolk were considered mere fish by humans. (This reminds me of how 18th century western academics used to classify other races as subhuman. Disgusting.) But then two hundred years ago, the Ryugu Kingdom became a member of the World Government.

You would think that would improve relations, wouldn’t you? But no. The Celestial Dragons, the ones who held the real power, were still bigoted and were the worst of them all.

The Great Pirate Era hit and Den-san said that was the worst time of all. Human pirates rampaged through Fishman Island. It was taken over.

And now I know why Jimbei was so determined to fight and die for Whitebeard. Saint Whitebeard the Great saved Fishman Island, claimed it for his own and imposed peace.

But humans still didn’t like Fishmen. The Strawhats had seen that at Sabaody. Even though the World Government bridged the gap in relations, it did not improve much. 

Then two figures stepped up to change Fishman Island’s history forever.

Queen Otohime, Shirahoshi’s mother, tried to convince the islanders to live in harmony with humans. 

Fisher Tiger, the hero who invaded Mariejois ON HIS OWN to free the imprisoned Fishman slaves, called for a parting of the ways between Fishmen and humans. 

I haven’t heard all the story yet, but I’m guessing these two have a Major Difference of Opinion.

I can’t wait to hear the rest. 

This is some good stuff. I love the themes in this arc. There’s so much here that resonates strongly with current events. It’s almost spooky...

You’re right, Franky. There’s no point. Just smile and nod.

[figjelly]

The 2018 Rumination Spectacular

It’s a long post. It’s gonna be triggering. Blacklist “ash 2018″ and “long post.” Sorry mobile users. Here’s a picture. Use this as a warning that you should blacklist those tags NOW if you don’t wanna read:

For about a week, I’ve wondered how to start this post. How to finish it. What to put in the middle. It’s really a shame, being depressed and anxious and all sorts of other things but maintaining a high self-esteem. It’s not like I want to. My mind and my brain and my body refuse to let me just be. They constantly remind me I have to be center stage, the best, to be adored. Let’s be honest. I don’t have high self-esteem. I have an obsessive, insatiable desire for love because I was born to abusive people. I was raised by more abusive people. I’ve continued to place my trust and well-being in abusive people. And then, when things fall spectacularly apart, I blame myself. I blame my body. I blame my brain. I blame my mind. A lot has happened this year. A big thing: the realization that I desperately crave others to want me. I want to feel loved and valuable and interesting and just wanted. And, I guess, that’s what school gave me. I left my PhD program in May 2017 and it’s taken almost two years to realize I didn’t stay in school or move into higher education because I had a burning passion (okay, I mean, I do still have a passion for my work but it wasn’t the foundation). The American education system gave an abused child something slightly better than I had: praise and positive feedback for jumping hoops. My home life twenty years ago? There was no rhyme or reason to which behaviors would yield which result. School? College? Grad school? Let’s face it. I’m white. At the time I was identifying as straight and female. I was going into STEM. Perform well, earn As, be friendly. Rules rules rules. Two weeks ago, I finally told my therapist of almost five years how my first sexual experience was a doctor raping me. It’s really funny. Hilarious actually how it’s taken thirty-one years to feel like I am my own person. Because before the doctor, there’d been my step-father (”It isn’t really enough to do anything with,” the police had told me when I was sixteen at my then therapist’s office). There’d been the high school boyfriend (”My dad was in the marines. I inherited his anger management problems.”). But there was also my mom. My grandmother who isn’t my grandmother but she “adopted” my mom as her daughter. They met online on a forum for Forever Knight, a 90s Canadian supernatural romance crime show about a woman who has a vampire for a partner. It’s really hard, yanno, to be gentle with myself. Don’t be angry.

So, 2018 was a year of me working on this. I’m still working. I’m angry at everything nowadays. There’s no good resolution to it other than to sit with it. I don’t understand how people can say, “Let anger go,” like I intentionally hold onto it. This anger and pain and trauma is carved into my bones and it gets carried through like oxygen in my bloodstream. Whenever I think about this anger at myself, the regret and the hurt, the left side of my left arm hurts. It starts about the middle of my forearm and goes to my pinky. Asking when this started isn’t a useful question. I’m angry because I let myself be used and hurt by people. I’m angry because I ignored my own needs and wants. I’m angry because now I’m thirty-one and it feels like my life is over. I made a lot of decisions and they were all made for the benefit of others. “Be your own person,” only works when you’ve got a person who isn’t desperate for love. I’m angry because I feel like I’ve wasted my life worrying about other people. Yes, yes. I’m not old. Don’t bother telling me. You don’t pay my bills. You can tell me what I feel when you give me money--substantial amounts of it. In 2005, I gave my step-father $1500. I’ve been working at the local Dairy Queen for years, saving money religiously because I was desperate to get a car, drive, gain independence. My parents told me the insurance was too expensive. My step-dad was the only driver because my mom has MS. It would probably never happen, but just in case. I should save, just in case. I gave my step-father money because he said, “The van needs fixed. Without it, you know your mom can’t get to the hospital.” I can’t remember any night between the ages of 15-17 when the police of the EMTs weren’t at my house. All of my homework was usually left abandoned in red and blue lights. I’d get back to it at midnight. Nothing mattered to my teachers except that I made As. At this point, I don’t know where blame lies but it seems pretty solid that I get stuck with the anger. 2018 was the year I realized that I don’t know how to have friends, how to keep a job, how to think about a career. 2018 was the year I realized that I have to make peace with living in poverty again. I was doing so well. Grad school was the best my finances had ever been. Until December 2013. I tried to kill myself. It’s old news. I was in the hospital. They forgot about me and I ended up spending three more days than needed. PROTIP: don’t try killing yourself during the holidays. Everyone will just tell you the holidays are rough for everyone. And finals. Mid-December is the time for students to also feel the pressure. If you’re neither of these, good luck. I took out massive amounts of student loans to go back to school. To pay my hospital bills. I was so desperate to get back into school because it was the only place that made sense. 2018 was the year I decided to change my name, my gender. I’m learning how to live in my body. It’s taken thirty-one years, but I’ve come to the realization it was mine. For six years, I took meds that made me weigh over 200 lbs all for the benefit of the high school boyfriend. For five years I starved myself because I wanted everyone to see what a successful PhD student I was. My body has never been mine before. This is a new thing for me. 2018? It started off with hope. There was less hope for most of it. I think it’s ending with hope. I hope it is.

My mom refuses to stop calling me. Five years ago, I stopped answering her calls. I begged her to stop. I was polite. I was rude. I was angry. I was at peace. I’ve tried everything. Her contacting me isn’t about me, it’s about her. It’s about what she wants. in December of 2013, I tried to kill myself.

It’s so old news, my mom told my partner when he called her, “Oh. Well, let me know when everything’s okay.” In 2009 I was admitted into the hospital for exhaustion. I’d had a breakdown in college. I was told to try yoga. Meditation. I was told it was just test anxiety. All I’ve ever desperately wanted was to be the priority.

And I bent for other people. I broke myself and put myself back together in ways other people would find pleasing. I bend and I break and now my body hurts. Chronically. In 2016 I was in a car accident. My partner has told me most of this story. I remember almost nothing. I spent two months locked up in my house with a concussion. More debt. More weight gained. My partner tells me at one point the doctors kept poking and prodding my feet. He tells me that I wasn’t responding and that my legs weren’t moving. He was horrified that the accident had left me paraplegic. I don’t remember any of this. The doctors eventually told him it was just shock. My body overloaded with too much too fast. And not enough neuron action, I guess. Too much, not enough. I discovered yesterday that Jack Kerouac said something similar. I’ve never read anything by him. Must be a common human feeling. Everything is too much. Everything is not enough. 2018 is right now still and I’m still working on reshaping myself for myself and not for others. 1987 was right then and thirty days before it ended, I came at the last minute. I’ve spent my entire life trying to make sure I was early to make a good impression. Now, I arrive when I arrive. I live in the land of -ish. Work hasn’t yelled at me. Yet. 2018: I started drawing again. I started writing again. I am trying not to feel like I’m too old. I’m working. I’m trying. I’m doing. I’m poor. I feel like my college degree warrants me not that but que was que is. I obsessively think about contacting my mom. No matter the meds, I have to count 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 every time I lock the door to the comic book shop where I work. If I don’t, the door isn’t locked. I’ve never had wide hips but I’ve always had thick thighs. My butt has always been big. My culture rather I’d accept my fate as a woman, bend myself and break myself to be one. They don’t belong to me. My thighs eat anything that comes between them. I wish I was being literal. I wish my thighs had eaten other people’s hands and other body parts. Vagina dentata is too late for my tastes. I want my thighs to reflexively snap like a bear trap and break someone’s neck. But I have a hard enough time finding clothes I can live with. I’m wearing the pants of Theseus right now. I’m tired of sewing patches into the holes my thighs keep eating. 2018 and I’m wondering if I will ever stop hurting. But it’s 2018 and I know I’m a better me than I’ve ever been before. And right now, that’s enough.

[wide-eyed-and-curly-haired-blog]

Lost Until I Found You

Hi! This is my first ever attempt at fanfiction so please give me feedback! Would love to hear what you think :) 

Chapter One

The stark, neon lights spelling out ‘Welcome to Riverdale’ that loom ahead, jolt Lexie back to reality as she drives into the town that has haunted her dreams since she was 8 years old. Concentrating on the task at hand – finding the motel she had googled weeks ago when she began to take her little summer trip seriously – distracts her from panicking and turning her car back around. After a few wrong turns and misread signs, Lexie finally arrives at her destination. She reaches to the passenger seat and opens the dashboard, snatching the crisp, white envelope into her hands and opens it. She examines the contents. A small smile spreads onto her face as she reads the post-it note her foster parents had attached to the wad of cash inside:

           Lexie,

           Spend wisely honey!

           If you need more, you know who to ring!

           Angie + Mike

If she was honest with herself, she knows she couldn’t have asked for better foster parents for the last 5 years, but there will always be something about Angela and Mike that makes her feel like a charity-case. She often wonders whether they only fostered her so that they could feel like they were giving good back to the world, taking time out of their busy business lives in California, and forgot about the parenting part. Sure, they give her all the money she wants and let her go wherever with whoever at any time, but sometimes all she’s ever wanted is someone to actually care where she is going and why. Besides, Lexie has learnt the hard way that money can’t buy you happiness. Still, they were an obvious improvement to the 6 families she’d lived with before that…or was it 7? She thinks back to a few days before, when she had said goodbye to Angela and Mike, smiling widely at the memory.

***

“OK, so, you’ve got all your clothes honey? And enough gas to get you to Riverdale? Are you sure you don’t want us to get you a lawyer to come with you for all the estate stuff? No, you’re right you can do it! Hell, you’re more independent than me and I’m 45!...” Angela rambles, her eyes glazed over as she reels off another speech about how proud she is of Lexie being a ‘strong independent woman’ who is grabbing life with both hands.

“Angie, you know I’ll be fine! Besides, I have your cellphone number if I need help with anything.” Lexie retorts, waving her hands at Angela indicating for her to back off. Her foster mom is right – Lexie is a strong independent woman – so independent that sometimes she feels like the parent in this household, she muses to herself.

Mike steps forward, not a man of many words; “You better set off now Lexie, you don’t wanna be driving right through the night.”

Lexie paints on a smile, glad for Mike’s calming influence on Angie, hugging them both into her arms. “I love you loads guys, I’ll keep checking in every few days. See you soon.”

She revs the engine and checks her rear-view mirror, grateful to see that her parents had already gone back inside. Lexie hated goodbyes. Even though she was excited to finally be leaving their sleepy little Californian suburb, she hated the fact that she was stepping into the unknown, or rather driving head on into it. But, this was something she knew she had to do, so she put the car into gear and accelerated out onto the open road.

***

A door slams on the motel front as a man leaves his room, bringing Lexie back into the present. She watches as he climbs into a pick-up truck and leaves the parking lot. Lexie takes a few deep breaths and stuffs her keys into her pocket, taking the envelope and backpack with her as she opens the car door. Her right foot hits the gravel first, and she swings the left one down to meet it, shutting the door behind her. She takes another breath. She isn’t ready for the bubble of longing that rises in her stomach as she breathes in the earthy, damp, pine forest smell. It reminds her of a little girl playing tag with the wind tangling in her hair and the sweet sound of running water from the river nearby. She swears she can almost hear the little girl’s laugh as she gets caught by a boy with a beanie hat.

Lexie pulls her backpack into her chest and walks to the motel reception desk. The set-up is not quite the standard of hotel she is used to. The white walls have cracks running down from the roof, plaster is peeling off revealing a dirt coloured underneath, where mould spills over the edge. She manages to get a room for the week and takes a few trips back and forth to unload her car. The room is simple and basic, and the receptionist said she could enquire about extending her stay at the end of the week. Lexie lowers herself onto the bed, which makes a creaking whine in return. After taking a minute to survey her surroundings, satisfied, she starts to unpack.

***

This can’t be the right one, Lexie thinks to herself as she rereads the gravestone for the tenth time, but it is. Her eyebrows pull together on her sun-kissed forehead as she tries to make sense out of the two graves before her. These graves were her parent’s graves, and whilst Lexie had been led to believe that after their death when she was 8 years old, all her family had shunned her and them, the countless gifts, candles and flowers that lay on the floor next to her feet contradicted that. She was overwhelmed.

The pain of losing them was still so hard every day, but she didn’t ever realise that other people missed them too. Her heart clenched in her chest, her breathing becoming more rapid as tears formed in the corners of her wide, emerald green eyes. She added a bunch of white roses to the pile. She thinks she could remember them being her mom’s favourites. Lexie sat in front of the graves for what felt like hours, going through all her memories of her parents as tears fell in streams down her rosy cheeks. Sometimes she went through the memories like a list to help her sleep at night. It comforted her knowing that she hadn’t forgotten them all yet.

Being here in Riverdale made it all seem so much more real, and she found herself gripping the grass with both hands as if she were clinging onto the past. In a grief-stricken haze, she made a decision to confront her past with all she had got, and she would do it tonight.

***

She made a quick stop at the gas station, glancing around the aisles for something she could eat as her stomach complained at her for forgetting dinner. Ah, this was what she was looking for – chips. As she looked through the different brands on offer, she couldn’t help but listen in to a conversation going on further down the aisle.

“Jesus guys, how many times do I have to tell you, GIRLS ARE NOT A PIECE OF MEAT, now leave the poor girl alone”

Lexie swivelled her head to look at a leather-clad pink-haired girl standing next to two, also leather-clad guys who were ogling at her. The girl had a low-cut top with a black leather skirt, complimented by fishnet tights and some boots, not too dissimilar from her own Doc Martens. Lexie met her eyes and then shifted her gaze quickly to rest on the taller of the two boys with her. She looked down over his blue flannel shirt that was a little too tight, offering a glimpse at a tightly toned chest underneath. He wore a thick, leather jacket that was slightly aged, and fit him like a glove. Her eyes travelled upwards to a large S-shaped tattoo on his exposed neck, and widened as she realised which part of town they had come from. Interrupting her from her inner turmoil, a low, deep grunt of a voice seemed to silence the store.

“See something you like, Princess?”

Lexie snapped her eyes back up to meet his and frowned, licking her lips. She prayed her voice wouldn’t betray her fear as she took a step forward.

“Yes, actually. I wanted to grab a packet of those chips right behind you. Driving makes me hungry.”

The trio clearly didn’t expect that response, as the smaller boy and pink-haired girl chuckled and nudged each other, looking at the taller one with their eyebrows raised.

“Didn’t your parents ever teach you to charm a snake? Not step on its tail and make it bite?”

Lexie feigned confusion and sauntered forwards, making sure to swing her hips as she made her way across to where he stood, never taking her eyes away from his. When she reached where they stood, she pretended to reach around the tall boy, angling her body so that it was inches away from his and grabbed the chips from behind him. She looked up at him through her eyelashes and said “No, but I have learned that food beats sex any day, so I’ll just take the chips thanks.”

This resulted in a roar of laughter from small-boy and pink-girl, so Lexie winked and walked to the cashier. She bit her cheeks to stop her from laughing as she watched a clearly rattled tall-boy leave the store with his friends, trying not to feel a pull of adrenaline as they zoomed off on three motorbikes. Phew, Lexie thought to herself. That was too close. She wanted to throw the Serpents off her scent before she was ready to see them again, and what better way to do it than with a little flirting. Especially, because she knew that if the bottom of her crop top rose a tiny bit higher up her rib cage, her cover would have been blown by the familiar S that was engraved on her skin.

She got back into her car, took a few deep breaths and headed to confront her past. There was only one place they could be, she thought. The Whyte Wyrm.

[sanerontheinside]

Call Sign (1 of 2, apparently)

Over a year ago I did a prompt run for titles. Now, it’s been over a year, and I’ve amassed over 30 titles. Obviously I’m never gonna fill them, eh? y’all thought. 

Actually, about a third of them have ideas attached, and a few more have ideas that I’m lukewarm about, so they’re still marinating. You should know, there are... 7 aus between them, and 2 short stories (that I’m relatively set on going with). 

Call Sign alone, however, happened to be a particularly active title, and spawned 3 stories. One buggered off and found another name to live under (and, incidentally, another au). One is a Rogue One au. 

That is not this one. 

“Captain,” Governor Arkin grated irritably, “you were tasked with subduing and eradicating the rebels, and yet the terrorist attacks on the Empire's citizens continue!”

Ty drew himself up taller, forcing down a misplaced pang of wounded pride and smoothing his face to a neutral mask for the Governor’s lecture. It wasn’t his first time. It wouldn’t be the last, either. He’d be thoroughly reamed, sent out to do the job “properly this time,” yet again without assistance, and criticised again for failure. Better him in the line of fire than his men.

They were doing their jobs! They were, truly, doing their best. Problem was, Onderon’s military hadn’t been much to boast of since the Clone Wars, when their most respected generals had abandoned their posts in the midst of the Separatist occupation and joined forces with the deposed King Dendup. For a time, they’d even won back their standing, all of them—until the arrival of the Empire’s forces. Now, their king was dead, former rebels declared outlaws once more, and the people of Onderon again utterly demoralised. This was nothing like the fire Ty remembered, when the Gerrera siblings began to show the first signs of a true, organised resistance force.

Despite his fairly young age, Ty had earned his rank as Captain of the Guard fair and square—he’d been the best in his class. But he harboured no illusions about how he might compare to his predecessors. His uncle General Tandin might well have been a walking legend in comparison.

Ty was just… doing his best. Besides, how could he ask his men, his brothers-in-arms, to fight their own family? Uncle Ari might still be out there, despite reports of his suspected death. Ty certainly wasn’t going to be the one to turn reports into reality.

So he fell back on the usual script; not enough people to comb the mountains, not enough equipment or weaponry to flush the caves. He wasn’t going to sell out his men either, after all. Ty had the feeling the Empire knew all about their familial connections among rebels, and also caught the feeling that they didn’t care enough, but that could change at any moment.

But, for once, things did not go according to plan. Apparently, Governor Arkin did have a limit to his patience.

“Backup, he says. You want backup?” Arkin snarled. “Fine. I’ll put in a request for an orbital strike.”

Ty barely held back a horrified noise. “Governor, sir, we’ve requested one before, the Empire—”

“The Empire will provide resources at my request,” Arkin replied scathingly, “as your people proved unequal to the task. You call this a military, boy? I ought to send you to the Imperial Academy, but I don’t expect to see you after that strike anyway. Dismissed, Captain,” Arkin added with an ugly sneer, and Ty, shell shocked, fell back on trained habits. He saluted—making it just barely passable, he was trying so hard to keep his hands from shaking—and turned on his heel, all but fleeing the Governor's office.

Office. He’d defiled the bloody throne room, but that was neither here nor there.

Fuck, Ty thought, fucking fuck fuck shit fuck arse. He needed a drink. And a Mandalorian. A drink to appease an annoyed Mandalorian, and a Mandalorian to help him find the right fucking swear words, and tell him what the fuck to do, because Ty honestly didn’t fucking know anymore.

Fortunately, he knew where to find both.

Imps could say what they liked about the Clone Wars vets still in their command structure, but Ty preferred working with Commander Naasade, and drinking with him. For one thing, Naasade was efficient, and could drink anyone under the table. For another, the vet could always make sense of things, like command decisions.

Particularly this latest slap in the face.

“They’re sending a squadron of troopers to wipe out the resistance fighters in the mountains,” Ty mumbled into his fourth drink, about two hours later. His head was floating and his ears were ringing, but Naasade looked completely unaffected. Luckily Ty wasn’t stupid enough to try a drinking game with him.

“They’ve been saying that since we got here.” Naasade shrugged. “They say it about every planet with a resistance cell, anyway.”

“Yeah?” There was just a hint of bleak sarcasm that Ty couldn’t keep out of his voice. “What happened to Lothal?”

Naasade pinned him with a too-sober look. “Onderon isn’t Lothal. You’re Inner Rim, kid. That’d be like the Emperor ordering a strike on Alderaan.”

That sounded fair enough, Ty supposed, staring into his glass again. Things made a lot more sense when alcohol was involved, but that wasn’t necessarily a good thing.

He was sad. Why was he sad?

“I don’t wanna, kill ‘em all,” he slurred, then frowned with effort. The Empire wanted the rebels crushed, gone, forgotten, but… “S’not… right. They’re people.”

Naasade sighed. “Better be careful who you say that around, kiddo. You’re never the one who picks the booth with the jammer in it, what’re you gonna do when I’m not around to watch your sodden arse?”

Ty smiled. That sounded like a fond sort of grumble.

One thing the occupation kept reminding him of, was that there were stupid damn idealistic idiots everywhere, green and naive and itching for a way to get themselves killed. Drinks with Ty always left him in a foul mood and a sour taste in his mouth.

Naasade sighed irritably into his drink, then thought better of it and pushed the glass away. He had an appointment to keep as it was—and it just got much less pleasant. A night patrol, an out-of-the-way meeting. Now a warning to pass along.

People like that, naive and idealistic and stupid-young, they made his job easier, sometimes. Sometimes all he had to do was sit someone down for long enough that they’d lay out the plan for the next month in perfect order for him. Sometimes he got the chance to stretch out, talk rings around an officer until he could play them like a bes’bev, make them a Rebel sympathiser for a day to get the newest codes for transmission frequency encryption.

Ty was loyal, and devoted completely, to Onderon—not to the Empire. That was a crucial distinction; Naasade had no problem manipulating Imps to do whatever he needed them to. Disillusioned Imps were, in fact, the easiest to compromise. But Ty was less a target for recruitment than a source, and every time the kid walked away Naasade thought the Empire would swallow him whole, leave the body in a sewer somewhere.

Didn’t want to kill Rebels… Yeah, that kid wouldn’t last long.

Naasade was here shadowing an injured Fulcrum. He didn’t even know which one of them it was: some clever fucker in Command had once suggested tagging multiple people with that call sign, to have the Imps chasing their own tails for a bit. Based on the fact that Command had assigned him to babysit, and seemed to be keeping a very close eye on the situation, Naasade was almost convinced this was the real, original Fulcrum.

He was perversely grateful, still, that they hadn’t specified. For one thing, it gave him plausible deniability. For another, if the rumours from the early days were at all true, Fulcrum was likely to be a Jedi.

He wasn’t ready for that yet. The thought had him reaching for his glass again in a hurry, washing down a wave of bitterness before it could overtake him. Then, of course, Naasade grimaced at the empty tumbler, put it down, pushed himself up out of the seat and made his legs take him out of the bar. He certainly didn’t need that habit coming back.

He’d probably earned himself a headache for tomorrow morning anyway. Annoyingly, it tended to center on the faint scar on the right side of his head—evidence of careful brain surgery, an extraction he didn’t even want to think about. It seemed both appropriate and ironic, that he be reminded of the exact thing that drove him to drink in the first place every time he forgot himself and went a little bit too far again.

It was almost time to start his patrol, anyway, which meant that he had to be outside the city in five.

He made it in two, pulling out of the main gate like a man let loose. This was his favourite patrol route. The grey, weighted feeling of the city melted away from him and into the brisk air as he cut through the fields.

Somewhere in the middle of his patrol route, Naasade slowed down to a casual, coasting halt. It was a habit he’d established well enough during his posting that no one would think it strange. Some of his patrolling reports mentioned meeting the locals. Naasade reported meeting farmers, peaceful people, and either passing along the boundary of their land or having well-intentioned quiet arguments on where the boundary lay.

Naasade made sure to never capture a recording of one. He always left his swoop idling; his helmet, with its shitty voice pickup, never got anything over the rumble of the engine it was sitting right on top of; and in the dark, with companion in shadow or behind a large boulder, the video feed also caught nothing.

Their meetings also fell in seemingly random intervals. Actually it had more to do with which of Onderon’s moons had completed its cycle, but most Imps never bothered to learn the traditions of the planets they’d invaded. A great deal of local mythology was built on the phases of Onderon’s satellites.

Naasade just considered himself lucky that tonight was one of those predetermined meetings, and that he wouldn’t need to run the risk of requesting emergency contact.

He parked his swoop near a generously-sized boulder and got up to stretch, and stare at the stars. He was making good time, anyway—as always.

Radha was already waiting for him, but that wasn’t unusual either.

“Late, Commander,” a low voice said from behind the stone.

“Just fine,” he murmured. “How’s the patient?”

“Pain in everybody’s arse,” Radha shot back without a second’s hesitation. “Could be worse, though. Should’ve moved out a month ago, said they wanted to stay—to help out around the house.”

Naasade raised an eyebrow at the night sky. “And you don’t need the help,” he said flatly.

“Naw, we do,” Radha’s grin was audible, “but we’re not the only ones. There’s others they could assist. Not complaining, anyway. Not really.”

He knew the frustration in that voice—was intimately familiar with it. Definitely a Jedi, then, Naasade thought. ‘Helping about the house’ could mean anything, too, from training the troops to literally helping them explore the cave passageways. He suppressed a heavy sigh. “You’re gonna need all the help you can get, soon.”

“Shit.” He caught sight of the dull glow of a discarded tabac stick before it was viciously ground out. “Storm?”

Naasade nodded, mentally reviewing the last known fleet positions. “Big one.”

The Governor could be a right bastard, but Moff Sesirri Tanai had control over this sector at the moment. She was cold, calculating, and absolutely ruthless. At least she wasn’t also Tarkin-levels of destructive.

Sesirri was pragmatic, though, even in her overkill.

Radha swore fervently. “When?”

“Soon. Eight days,” at a minimum. Naasade thought about it a moment, wondering what to expect from Moff Tanai. “Expect nightcrawlers,” he added.

Death Commandos. From behind the stone, Naasade thought he heard a strangled curse as the realisation hit. They hadn’t exactly needed to use that particular shorthand phrase before. “Can your friend get out on their own?”

“I don’t know,” Radha said. “If I tell them, they won’t leave. They’ll want to help.”

Naasade snorted quietly. “Figures. Can you relocate?”

Radha was silent for a moment. “Do they know where our house is?”

An excellent question. Ty never said, but there had to be a record of sightings, suspected resistance outposts. “I’ll ask around.” He’d picked up a trick or two from slicers over the years, and with the right set of commands, computers didn’t mind questions nearly as much as people might. “When can you take delivery?”

“Fourth moon.”

Naasade grimaced. “City beat.”

“Then I’ll find you. At market?”

“Generator side. Prearranged drop-off site.”

“Done,” Radha agreed. “Now go home, Imp.”

Naasade smiled faintly. “You too, Rebel scum.