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#It is too late for forgiveness but never too late for change.
daryltwdixon · 1 day
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The Ruins of Us: Chapter 13
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Summary: Daryl arrives to the Greene residence to find Y/N laying in bed with her injuries from the gunshot wound in the woods.
Notes: The flashback in this chapter is in direct correlation to the scene where Daryl tells Andrea about a time he got lost in the woods for nine days when he was twelve years old. Also: reminder we’re going to be veering off canon for a little bit. Obvi have to add / take away with an extra character being hurt. We will mostly stay on the general plot line with some minor changes.
Forgive the relatively short chapter! Spend all day mostly packing between work. Enjoy!
As the bike roars with life under Daryl, he can’t help but think about Y/N even more. God, she was the only damn thing he could think about lately. If he was truly honest with himself, she was always on his mind. She would creep in even when they weren’t speaking–the littlest things reminding him of her. The time when she was at school, he would find traces of her all over his house, in the woods…it didn’t take much for her to come front of mind for him. From a pair of socks lost under his bed, full of holes and barely even white anymore to her initials in the tree by their lake spot. She was goddamn everywhere. He would curse to himself if anyone ever brought up her name when they ever drove with him anywhere, seeing her sharpie signature on the door of his truck. He never knew what to say. Girls that he would distract himself with would suddenly get all quiet and weird, the guys he would drive to dealer’s houses and back for Merle would crack jokes about who his ‘little girlfriend was’. It took all the willpower in the world not to knock them out the passenger seat in the moving vehicle and run them over with his truck tires. But Merle, surprisingly… Merle would never say a damn thing about it or her when he was with him. Maybe in the beginning days when he wanted to kick Daryl’s ass for letting her leave like that, after he heard about Shane coming by. But other than that, Merle seemed just as sad to see her go. Whether it was because he saw that Daryl had lost a piece of himself or Merle felt like he lost a friend too. He didn’t know, but either way he was silently grateful for that one piece of humility Merle had for him. 
x flashback x
Daryl hadn’t eaten in days. His stomach gnawed at him relentlessly as he plucked wild berries from bushes—anything to stave off the hunger. He didn’t even think to grab his dad’s crossbow when he wandered into the woods that day. It was supposed to be just a short trek. He knew these woods—knew them like the back of his hand– or so he thought.
But then the rabbit. He chased it too far, too fast, and suddenly the woods didn’t look the same. The trees were different, unfamiliar, their knotted roots like strangers, the trails he used to recognize now gone. No signs of his old paths, nothing to guide him back. When the sun began to set, the cold reality set in. He huddled under a fallen log, the weight of the darkness pressing in on him, fear creeping in as he realized just how far he’d wandered. He cursed himself remembering his dad had gone on some bender from the waitress that night— no telling when he’d be home. And Merle was still in Juvie for the next few weeks. By the third day, the anxiety clawed at him. He felt like the woods were closing in on him, suffocating him. After digging a small hole to take care of business, he wiped himself with the nearest leaf—poison oak. It wasn’t until his skin started to burn and itch that he realized his mistake. The days that followed were hell. His hands and ass were on fire, the relentless itching driving him close to madness. Desperation made him remember the snares he'd shown Y/N how to make. He used some brush and an old shoelace to set one up, and when he finally caught a chipmunk, he didn’t hesitate. Cutting it open with his switchblade, he ate it raw, too hungry to care about anything but filling his belly.
On the ninth day, Daryl thought he might lose his mind completely. He tried marking trees, tying strips of his shirt around them to track where he’d been, but no matter how far he walked, he kept finding that same tattered strip of fabric. The realization that he was going in circles gnawed at him almost as badly as the hunger. Lying under a tree, his body weak and mind clouded, he heard something—his name. No, he thought, just my head playin' tricks. He squeezed his eyes shut, willing the noise to stop, trying to push past the exhaustion and haze.
“Daryl? What the hell?”
The voice was closer now, too real to ignore. His eyes blinked open, squinting against the sun, which formed a halo around the face of someone standing over him. For a moment, he couldn’t make out who it was—his vision was blurred, unfocused.
Then, a familiar hand landed on his shoulder, pulling him back to reality.
“Daryl, what happened?” Her voice—Y/N’s voice—finally broke through. He blinked hard, struggling to make sense of her being there, his dry lips cracking as he tried to speak.
“Y/N?” His voice rasped, hoarse from days without use.
“Yeah, idiot. Where the hell have you been? It’s been days,” she said, hands cupping his dirt-smeared face, her fingers brushing over the scratches and bruises. He winced as she touched the raw spots, and she quickly whispered a soft, “Sorry.”
She grabbed him by the arms, hauling him to his feet, though his legs felt like they might give out beneath him.
“Got lost,” he muttered, the words barely leaving his throat.
“Don’t tell me I know these woods better than you now,” she teased, and for a moment, his lips twitched in what almost felt like a smile.
“C’mon, let’s get you back. I’ll make you a sandwich,” she said, gripping his hand tightly and pulling him toward home.
x flash forward x
As he approaches the mailbox with the faded painted “Greene” name, Daryl kicks the kickstand out from his bike, leaving it running. He makes his way up to the gate with haste, his hands shaking as he pushes the large gate open. He latches it closed behind him, and starts walking the bike through quickly. The driveway is long and rough, the dust being blown around as his tires travel up the dirt to the front of the house. His chest feels like it could cave in as he approaches the large white house. That ominous feeling in his gut twisting more and more the closer he got. The house is framed by towering willow trees, and Daryl’s certain this must be someone’s actual home, not just a farm. The hedges look freshly trimmed, the grass recently cut, but it still holds onto that old, quaint charm. Warm lights glow through the downstairs windows, and the porch light is on, giving the place an unsettling sense of normalcy. Daryl practically flies off his bike once he nears the porch steps, barely saving his bike from falling over with the speed of his movements. He skips steps on his way up to the house, heart hammering against his chest. He could feel the cold sweat on the back of his neck, his whole body on high alert. 
Please be okay, please.
As he’s reaching for the door, a woman’s voice speaks from the side of the porch, “you close the gate on your way in?” 
He looks over, and it’s the woman that was on the horse. Daryl’s nerves are so frayed he doesn’t feel like he could come up with any words in response, so he grunts out to her, hoping she’ll take it as affirmation. He ignores her next words as he swings the door open in a hurry, stepping into the house. It was so…clean in here. He’s immediately aware of everyone in the room off to his left. Rick and Lori stand suddenly when they catch his eye. An older man comes into view as Daryl begins to make his way over, but the man stops him in the archway.
“Who’re you?” he asks. He has a kind voice, and the question isn’t aggressive. 
“Daddy, I’m sorry, he just barged in,” the woman's voice comes up behind Daryl. His feeling of anxiety is climbing to a panic as he waits longer and longer, feeling trapped between the two strangers. He’s doing the best he can to peer over the man’s shoulder to see inside the room. 
“He’s with us, Hershel,” Rick’s hand gently lands on the man’s shoulder, his fingers tightening around it as he pulls him back. He looks so pale, like he’s lost blood or maybe is just distraught over his son. Rick looks to Daryl, searching his eyes– scanning over what must be a panicked, wide eyed look on him–with an expression that leaves his stomach suddenly hollow.
“She dead?” Daryl whispers out. His voice is barely audible, too many emotions bobbing in his throat. The man in front of him has turned away, and Rick puts his hand up to Daryl’s chest to slow him as he steps into the room fully. Daryl’s breath hitches as he takes in the room.
Carl is lying motionless on a bed to the left, his arms by his sides outside the blanket. He has the sheets covering most of his body, so Daryl can’t necessarily see what happened to him. He looked so pale, so… sick. But his chest rises with each breath he takes. He only glances at the kid, and looks to the small bed in the other corner.
Daryl’s breath nearly completely leaves him then, seeing her lying there so serenely. God, she looks so pale. So lifeless. His hands flex at his sides, unsure whether to move closer or stay put. She looks too still, too fragile. And the sight of her like that sends a wave of guilt crashing over him—he should’ve been there. His eyes dart over her, to her gently rising chest, trying to make sure she was breathing. His fingers twitch, fidgeting with the strap of his crossbow. If he could’ve been there–if he’d been a little faster–this wouldn’t have happened. Suddenly, he gains control of himself and rushes to her side, the old man stepping back as he sits by her side. The floorboards creak as he steps closer to her, crouching down. He holds Y/N’s hand in both of his, grateful for the heat he feels in her palm. It’s soft, warm–alive. And for the first time in a long, long time, he feels moisture in his eyes. He can’t help the trembling on his lips, his chin quivering. Everyone is silent as they watch him duck his head, pressing his forehead into her hand. Something starts bubbling up in him after a long moment. The guilt he feels turning into the only thing he knew how to name–anger. But there was something else, too—something stronger. He would never let this happen again. No matter what it took, he promises himself then and there to make sure she’d be safe from now on. No more staying away, no more hiding how he truly felt with her. He finally is able to breathe, knowing she’s at least alive. But who let this happen? Who did this? The anger threatening to boil over was starting to unleash from him. 
“What happened?” Daryl demands, lifting his head up suddenly with breakneck speed. He’s turning on the spot to look at the old man, then Rick, “where the hell is Shane, wasn’t he supposed to be with you? With her? What happened?” 
“We—we were out in the woods,” Rick starts, his voice trembling. He sits next to Carl, hunched over, Lori’s hand gripping his shoulder, the other resting on Carl’s still hand. “There was a deer… a buck. They went to approach it—it was so still, Daryl. It just stood there, didn’t even flinch. And then…” He swallows hard, looking down at his son. “Then we heard the gunshot. Suddenly, both of them were on the ground.”
“Who the fuck–?!” Daryl began, but Rick held his hand up.
“One of my family members, Otis, was tracking the buck to bring it back here,” the man–Hershel, was it?-- explains, “it was an accident,”
“But he missed,” Rick continues, his voice cracking with frustration as he glances at Carl. “Missed the damn thing. The bullet went straight through Carl—between the ribs, under the lungs. No major organs, thank God, but it… it lodged itself in Y/N’s stomach.”
“Luckily, it slowed down when it passed through Carl,” Hershel adds, Lori wincing at the word luckily. “But it shattered into fragments. I managed to get one out, but Otis and your friend Shane went to get medical supplies for the rest.”
“Why can’t you jus’ get em’ all out now?” Daryl asks, his eyes flickering up to the older man.
“They’ve nicked an artery. See here,” Hershel steps closer, pulling down the sheet to reveal the bandage on Y/N’s abdomen. The sight of her stomach—swollen, bruised blue and black—makes Daryl suck in a breath, his heart falling from his chest, “She’s bleeding internally. I need to go in without her moving, but when I tried earlier, she wouldn’t stay still–from the pain of it. I’ll need to put her under.” 
“And when I do that, she won’t be able to breathe on her own,” Hershel adds softly. “That’s why I sent Otis and your friend to get the supplies for surgery.”
“He ain’t my friend,” Daryl mutters under his breath. “You a doctor or somethin’ before all this?”
“Something like that,” Hershel replies quietly, before turning and walking out of the room.
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insaneillusionist · 1 year
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Rocky Aur Rani Ki Prem Kahani is an incredible movie and I recommend you all watch it, and they have the perfect usage of a sequin shirt.
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robotsafari · 2 months
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redrawing my favorite gba chain of memories scenes with my own interpretations part 1(?):
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“You’re thinking about me… You’re afraid of the darkness I command.”
#beep boop you want fries with that#kingdom hearts#riku#ansem#GBA CHAIN OF MEMORIES IS SO GOOD. please play it over the remake im begging. it also plays a lot better too.#every ansem scene is better in gba com because i dont have to listen to richard epcar attempt to be intimidating#they altered so many scenes in the remake and a lot of the changes suck !! just straight up !! i will never forgive them for changing#this scene and the previous lexaeus scenes. like why did they have riku get possessed for a second only for the next cutscene to#literally be about riku trying not to get possessed. like that makes no sense. its just cheap shock value and just treating lexaeus#like shit. at least he mentioned zexion. ok if i knew how to do rom hacks i could literally change the dialogue myself to mention zexion.#ok sorry for complaining. uhhh#the composition is clearly ripped off from the owl house. sorry. season 1 belos scene.#and the background is just the original gba bg of the scene but blurred to look less pixelated#sorry the anatomy sucks. i know rikus arms shouldnt be that long but too late. kms.#this scene is so good because augh. this is the first time in this game we come face to face with the real ansem. not just diz pretending#to be him to just shove down ‘darkness bad’ down his throat. this is why mickey comes to save him in this scene. because riku is in#real danger here. thats also the reason why mickey sends his power again when riku is being dangled like a puppet BECAUSE ANSEM WAS THERE#FOR REAL THIS TIME. anyway yeah i know ansem’s sprite doesn’t appear when he says that but the portrait is a silhouette so i went#weh. why not !!#anyway im obsessed w/ cryptid ansem. ghost inhabitanting a fallen kingdom. continuing the fucked up experiments like if they never stopped#OK IVE ALREADY RAMBLED ENOUGH AND THIS SHIT IS GOING INTO RE:KH TERRITORY. (hunter voice) BYEEEEEEE
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transmasc-rose · 3 months
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Still finishing this and the others up, but since AU characters are allowed on Art Fight I'm adding the Silent Ponds. Which I haven't talked much about here.
I'm @/AnxiousHare on Artfight! >:)
Brief(ish) AU summary: Amy and Rory were taken as kids by Madame Korvarian and were raised to catch/kill the Doctor with Mels/River Song. They succeed in capturing the Doctor using Amy as a "lure", but he isn't killed immediately for research purposes.
Life is very poor for the Doctor there, but he doesn't want to leave without Amy, and Amy keeps petitioning for the Doctor to be kept around due to her own attachment to him.
After Amy has and loses Melody (Korvarian brings Melody back to her past self, kick-starting the events of the AU in its own little paradox), Amy, Rory, and Mels take the Doctor and run away in the TARDIS.
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quietwingsinthesky · 1 year
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I’m not one for soulmates AUs but bobbyrufus soulmate AU of the ‘you have the last words your soulmate will ever say to you on your body somewhere’ kind.
#I MAKE THE RULES OF THE AU AND WHAT I SAY IS THAT THE MOMENT THE WORM ENTERS BOBBY TIME IS UP#ANYTHING SAID BY OR TO HIM AT THAT POINT DOESNT COUNT#YES. THIS IS SO THAT BOBBY HAS TO LIVE WITH ‘I will never forgive you for what happened. you got that? never. so change the subject bob.’#ON HIM. THE WHOLE TIME. AFTER OMAHA. EVEN AS HES TRYING TO APOLOGIZE IN THIS SCENE HE KNOWS HE WONT BE FORGIVEN#BECAUSE ITS ALWAYS BEEN TATTOOED ONTO HIM. THHAT THEY WOULD END LIKE THIS. WITHOUT BEING ABLE TO MOVE ON.#and so that Rufus’s last words can say ‘I never said I’m sorry Rufus.’ rufus constantly carrying this reminder of what Bobby did.#of the fact that he hasn’t apologized. yet. of the fact that by the time he does it’ll be too late.#and then you just. look imagine. imagine with me.#they say this to each other. there’s that moment where they realize… that’s it. end of the line.#and then obv worm!samuel knocks them both out. them both going down thinking ‘oh this is what does it’ but it doesn’t. it doesn’t.#they wake up again.#and Rufus talks to Bobby. Bobby talks to Rufus. how is this happening? did they break the rules? get a second chance?#their words are still on their skin. unchanging. the last things they ever said to each other.#but there’s a glimmer of. almost hope. and then Rufus turns to shock Bobby. and Bobby starts backing away.#audible drop of Rufus’s heart as he realizes. no. they didn’t get out. and then he dies. Bobby is forced to kill him.#Bobby’s on the other end of the possession stick now. he’s the one with Rufus’s blood on his hands.#and the last thing Rufus said to him. he’s always gonna have it there on his skin. that Rufus didn’t forgive him. and then Bobby killed him.#(and it wasn’t his fault. he knows how possession works. knows there was no fighting this thing or saving Rufus.#but he still takes the brunt of the guilt. Carries it. till he dies and despite everything it’s still Rufus he wants guiding him through it.#bobbyrufus#spn#Bobby singer#rufus turner
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fourswords · 1 year
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actually i think in a post-canon world where shadow is "brought back" (aka made fully corporeal again because at the end of the manga he is Very Much still alive which i thought was Awesome) he should get the chance to actually make proper friends with link. i know popular fanon consensus is that link was never reformed at the end and green & red & blue & vio all remained separate but i think it would be interesting. there's a lot to be said for the friendship that i think would grow readily between zelda & shadow since it WAS her words and her capture by the dark cloud at the end that ultimately pushed him to aid the light (because he was scared FOR her, which is IMPORTANT) but for all that the friendship between vio and shadow was based on false pretenses there is absolutely no question that they DID grow attached to each other, enough that when vio attempted to smash the dark mirror shadow was very visibly upset and after the four links reunite vio is very much...i wouldn't say regretful, because he knew what he was going to have to do from the very beginning (because shadow WAS very much a threat and i don't blame him for it), but saddened. and the thing is! at the end, when shadow aids the four, they respond in kind—it's green who finds "vio" and instantly tries to get him to lean on him and offers him a hand to help him stand. it's blue that notices that "vio" is having trouble turning the sphere and turns it for him. it's vio that pleads with shadow as he lay dying to just hang in there, and it's green who ultimately tells shadow that he's one of them, which leads to shadow finally letting himself dissolve in the light. it is all the parts of link that surround him in death, and so i think it would stand to reason that if shadow were resurrected he should get to properly befriend the whole person whose parts all accepted him in the end. and honestly i think they'd get along great.
#like i understand where people are coming from when they say they don't like the ending of the four swords manga. i get it. i do#but ultimately link IS all four of them. they live in him because they ARE him just as they lived as him because they WERE him#& there's a lot of flexibility on how one can interpret link after being split by the four sword so maybe shadow actually CAN have#a conversation with vio about how everything went down even while link is one person. because. yknow. link IS vio!!!!!!!!!#the four were all their own people but they are also link. am i saying this in a way that makes sense#and he and shadow WOULD be friends. betrayal aside. if shadow was dead set on never forgiving vio he wouldn't have#pretended to be him and aided the others. he would've just tried to go after zelda himself#as useless an endeavor as that would've been because he was weak as fuck at the time#like. zelda was the one who pushed him to change for real with her genuine words of kindness. she was the first to REALLY offer him that.#but pretending that vio didn't feel some sort of attachment too is dumb and LITERALLY AT THE VERY END ALL THE PARTS OF LINK ACCEPTED HIM.#you can say whatever you want about the viz translation and how it differs from the original but it popped off when vio said#'he wanted to be with us...to be with his family.'#like bro they literally called him family. maybe it was too late to change anything. but it still matters that all four parts of link#acknowledged him as such. vio said that and nobody contested it.#anyway. i have so many thoughts about link&shadow&zelda post-canon. whatever#fsa#txt
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protagonist-art · 7 months
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Scratched Veneer question:
Can you imagine Veneer apologizing to Floyd for him getting declawed? If I were in Veneer's position I most certainly would, and I wouldn't blame Floyd for scratching me up or being bitter over losing his claws.
yes!!! 100% >:o) he still feels sickly terrible about it to this day... besides the draining his life, it's the incident he feels the worst about </3
I'll go on more abt it in the tags!!!
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wavebiders · 2 years
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Thinking about the concept of redemption in Warcraft being about choice first and foremost. Rotating it around in my head.
#it's something that always stuck out to me about the content i started with#this idea that a character can have done awful things that their victims are under no obligation to forgive them for#but they can always choose to start being better#Jaina in bfa starts out being basically defined by her regrets#but she chooses to face her demons and let herself heal#the major turning point in her arc is just trying to forgive herself#and then of course everything with revendreth in shadowlands#the thing that determines whether a soul can be redeemed isn't if their actions were understandable or not that bad#it's if they're willing to acknowledge the harm they caused and if they *want* to be redeemed#and again it's purely about them#no interaction with their victims required bc that's not the point#and I figured that was just like a recent theme#but I was reading rise of the lich king to get ready for wrath#and it's already a thing there!#by the end of it there is still a bit of humanity left in Arthas it's not too late#but he chooses to kill it and commit fully to being the villain#meanwhile Sylvanas whose actions are every bit as unforgivable and vile as his#when confronted with having a bit of her own soul left#chooses to change and try to make things right#and that doesnt erase what she did and most characters are rightfully never going to be cool with her#but she still gets to make that choice in the end#and so does not end up becoming exactly like Arthas after all#warcraft#cant believe im going this insane for this kinda franchise#that by nature has to be more about churning out new fun exciting stuff over telling a truly fullfilling story#and that is mostly what it does#but idk man some if themes and arcs hit way harder than I was expecting#I'm impressed
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yooboobies · 2 months
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iniziare · 3 months
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Tag drop: Kafka
#kafka. [ we believe that existence has meaning; but that meaning is bestowed by ourselves. not by choices. ]#kafka: ic. [ like a spider in the center of her web. it has a thousand radiations; and she knows well every quiver of each of them. ]#kafka: inquiries. [ apologies for interrupting your little get-together. but I’m sure once you’ve heard my request; you’ll forgive me. ]#kafka: countenance. [ destiny has thousands of faces. why does it choose to wear this one? ]#kafka: introspection. [ it started with sincerity and anticipation followed by a passionate catharsis; with one climax after another. ]#kafka: meta. [ she must have sought something extraordinary. everything she does comes at a great cost. ]#kafka: wishes. [ if you wanna look for some fun. i won't stop you. i mean after all; elio didn't put it in the script; why would it matter?#kafka: etc. [ seems i came at a bad time. / no no; i think you couldn't have timed it better. 23:47:15. very punctual; kafka. ]#kafka: stellaron hunters. [ we all have our own individual goals. we may work together; but we work together for our own reasons. ]#kafka: astral express. [ in pursuit of the most dangerous objects in the universe? in that sense; you and i are cut from the same cloth. ]#kafka: conflict. [ looks like we're the ones getting ambushed. / but they're the ones getting besieged. ]#kafka: nessun dorma. [ da capo. fortississimo. capriccio. recitativo. doloroso. leggiero. ]#kafka: beauty. [ beautiful things have one thing in common: fragility. the more fragile; the rarer. maybe that's what makes it precious. ]#kafka: destiny. [ that's the nature of destiny; it creates a miracle but convinces you of an accident. ]#kafka: pteruges-v. [ it was one of many planets changed by a stellaron. it's a shame i never got to witness how far it fell at the time. ]#kafka: bladie. [ … her voice was very gentle. and even the monster inside his body stayed silent to listen to her. ]#kafka: bladie. [ i long for you; i who usually long without longing; really and utterly long for every bit of you. ] daybreakrising.#kafka: veritas ratio. [ i believe you have fallen victim to a misconception; doctor. who says it is elio who harbors an interest in you? ]#kafka: veritas ratio. [ does it smell of me; veritas? ] avaere.#kafka: caelus. [ i called out to you and you came. you had many choices; but everything led you here. to right here and right now. ]#kafka: caelus. [ everything that you love: you will eventually lose. but in the end; love will return in a different form. ] astrxlfinale.#kafka: elio. [ there's an empty space in my mind; my heart. changing that part of myself isn't something i can do alone. he can help me. ]#kafka: silver wolf. [ ignoring the rules is something she and i have in common. ]#kafka: sam. [ you should really stop playing with your food; kafka. / i know. next time. this time… it's already too late. ]#kafka: v. new babylon. [ i was a devil hunter. when people don't feel fear; they are dominated by desire; pleasure. they become “devils”. ]#kafka: v. present. [ we can only add one gold thread each time but eventually: we will pave the way for the future that is written. ]#kafka: v. future. [ the future is like a labyrinth: every divergence is merely an inducement. there is only one real path. ]#kafka: wishes. [ if you wanna look for some fun. i won't stop you. i mean elio didn't put it in the script; so why would it matter? ]#kafka: little notes. [ the mara's tether is in her grasp. she will not pull it before the designated time. nor shall she relinquish it. ]
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jvzebel-x · 5 months
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🦋
#sometimes i get really sad about my life you know? like. really sad about it lmao. for various reasons.#like it would be really cool to be normal. very often i just wish i was normal lmao.#but then i remember meeting this guy while i was homeless&he had everything that i late 20s/early 30s college grad would want#stable&well paying job in the field he actually went to college for#rented part of a banging a duplex that had a yard allowed dogs&was a five minute walk from downtown bar crawl area#had both one of my fave motorcycles-- an r6--&one of my all time dream cars-- a 6speed cts-v.#i presume a dating life from the tampons that were in his bathroom.#&yet. he was miserable from what i could tell lmao. &it was weird bc it was like he didnt realize that#until he met us lmao. i would be more annoyed by that. i was v annoyed by it at the time lmao. the amount of weird jealousy i dealt w while#fucking homeless+sick is disgusting&ill never forgive fucking anyone for it&a part of me will always be dead+rotted bc of it lmao.#but for him it was different in the way of. i could kind of understand it lmao.#he had come from a rough background from what i understand&was a success story.#&yet he clearly felt trapped in his own life. clearly felt like he was surrounded by things he should be more grateful for while none of it#filled the hole in him ppl like him are PROMISED success will fill. being apart of the status quo but on the good end will alleviate.#he had been in one accident&never rode his bike again. when i asked why he lied&told me the bike was unrideable bc he didnt know me lmao#&when i asked if there had been any damage past the obvious dent in the gas tank he got red+quiet+changed the topic.#he worked at some big bank&didnt bother trying to brag bc the one thing he DID know about me is that i am v anti bank+leftist lmao.#he considered himself a leftist too until he talked to me&realized he was actually v centrist in basically every view he had#&that centrism came from a desire to keep his privileges as a cis white straight man-- something that made him openly embarassed.#he used to deal thru college&when i met him he couldnt keep up w one round of dabs w me something that also obviously embarassed him.#he had surrounded himself w ppl just like him&was jarred upon meeting anyone outside of that bubble who wasnt a far right asshole.#&he didnt like what he saw about himself. &that was really obvious.#when we left his place after the brief week we were staying there he was literally in tears about how much he wanted to come.#to help&see where we ended up or whatever idk lmao. i guess im still actively annoyed by it lmao.#but i still get it on some level. when you reach the top&realize youre not fucking happy where do you go from there?#will a house do it? will moving to a different location for your same bullshit job do it? will meeting a girl exactly like you do it?#&when i want to be normal so bad it physically hurts i remember him&i think maybe things arent so bad lmao.#like it could be worse i guess lmao.
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pedrospatch · 5 months
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flutter
Jackson! Joel Miller x Pregnant! Female Reader
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snapshots masterlist
summary: When you finally start to show, Joel has a tough time with it as the reality sinks in—he’s going to be a father again.
warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, MINORS DNI. (TW) PREGNANCY. established relationship. no mention of reader’s age, however in other works for this universe, it is implied she is younger than Joel, her specific age will never be stated so do with that what you will. brief descriptions of a pregnant woman’s changing body, brief mention of morning sickness, mention of breastfeeding (it only comes up in a conversation very briefly) these subjects can possibly be triggering, especially mentions of a changing body, so while i try to handle everything with the utmost care, i still ask that you proceed with caution. domesticity, reader enjoys taking care of her family, ellie is a little shit, grumpy joel, he’s sort of a dick at first? but only because he’s working through some feelings so let’s forgive him, okay?
word count: 3.5k
a/n: this is part of the snapshots universe, but it could absolutely be read as a standalone too. minimal editing, this has been sitting in my drafts and i did a quick edit during my lunch hour, so please excuse any mistakes.
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“Shit.”
You almost can’t believe your own two eyes. Staring at your reflection in the large, oval shaped mirror hanging over the porcelain bathroom sink, your gaze widens in complete surprise. “Jesus Christ,” you mutter, turning to the side. It takes your brain about a good minute or two to process, really process, the way that your belly strains against the thin, white cotton of your camisole. It had seemingly swollen overnight—because it hadn’t been this prominent the day before, had it?
Over the last few months, there’d been changes.
Some subtle and some not so subtle.
“Ellie! Stop fucking staring at them,” you’d scolded the teenager late one evening during yours and hers weekly game night. For as hard as you tried focusing on what move you should make next, it was hard to concentrate on the chessboard in front of you when you could feel the way her eyes were fixed on your breasts. “I mean it! Quit staring at my boobs, you little shit.”
She held up her hands, her mouth full of popcorn.
“Hey, in my defense, they’re just fucking there, man. If anything, they’re fucking staring at me, okay?”
During your chess rematch the following week, you had accidentally knocked one of your pawn pieces off of the table. When you’d stood up and bent over to pick it up, she had made the observation that your butt seemed to have gotten a little bigger too.
“Bet Joel’s liking these changes,” Ellie had smirked. “It sure as hell explains why the headboard’s been banging against the wall more than usual lately.”
You threw the pawn at her, smiling in satisfaction when it bounced off her forehead and landed into her glass of lemonade.
One part of your body, however, hadn’t changed.
Not until now.
“Hon, trust me, you have nothing to be worried about,” Maria had assured you with confidence when you had brought up your concerns about your stomach. “Every woman, and every pregnancy, is different. I didn’t start showing until I was around six months, remember?”
“I guess you’re right.” You’d been around four months, then. “Doesn’t help that I haven’t felt the baby move.”
“You will,” Maria had promised. “Just be patient”
Biting your lip, you place a hand on your belly.
It’s always been one of the softer parts of you, but now, it’s firmed into a perfect, round bump.
“Maybe soon I’ll feel you move,” you murmur, giving it a gentle pat. You tug the lace hem of your camisole down as far as it can go and then pull at the elastic waistband of your blue, terry cloth shorts.
Shutting off the lights in the bathroom, you slip out into the bedroom where you find that Joel’s still tangled up in the sheets, fast asleep. He had been assigned to the afternoon patrol route today—normally an early riser, if he was still snoozing, it meant that he really needed the rest. Deciding it was best to let him keep sleeping for a little while longer, you quietly tiptoe out of your shared bedroom and head downstairs into the kitchen.
After making yourself a glass of fresh squeezed orange juice, and one for the kid as well, you prepare the coffee maker for Joel. You spoon dark roast grounds into the filter and set the timer for the coffee to start brewing in thirty minutes.
He should be up by then, you think, pulling a basket of eggs out of the refrigerator.
You’re starting to get used to this. Domesticity.
Despite your protests, Maria had made the decision to pull you off patrol that same afternoon you had shared the news of your pregnancy. “I’m putting you on leave,” she’d told you. “Effective immediately. I don’t want to see you outside of these walls. Got it?”
“That’s not fair, Maria. You were out on patrol until—”
One stern glare from her had shut you right up.
“Fine.”
Sure, you missed it and looked forward to the day when you’d be able to get back into the saddle with your rifle in hand, but this way of life had grown on you. Certainly a lot more than you thought it would.
You enjoyed taking care of the house. Packing Ellie her lunch for school and checking her homework. Having a nice a meal on the table for the three of you to enjoy in the comfort of your own home instead of having to go down to the crowded mess hall for supper because you and Joel were both always much, much too tired after a long day out on patrol to bother with cooking.
With the baby due to arrive in the winter, looking after your little family had become your purpose, and you did not mind it one bit.
As strips of bacon sizzle in one pan on the gas powered stove, you crack a couple of eggs into another, knowing the kid is already on her way downstairs. You can hear the sound of her old, tattered low top sneakers that you have been trying to throw away for almost a year now squeaking on the kitchen tiles just as you finish plating her breakfast.
“Morning!” Ellie pipes, the loud plop of her backpack into a chair prompting you to turn around. “What’s for brea—whoa! Holy shit!” Her brown eyes widen in shock when she sees you and her jaw drops. “Dude.”
“Ellie,” you say her name warningly as you walk over to the table. “Don’t.”
“You’re bigger!”
With a playful glare, you set her plate down, along with her glass of orange juice. “Thanks a lot, you little jerk.” You feign offense. “You’re making your own eggs from now on.”
“Fuck, I’m sorry.” Ellie’s cheeks flush a shade of red and she squirms, sputtering apologetically, “I swear, I don’t mean it like that at all. It’s just, your stomach, it didn’t—you didn’t look like this last night, you know?”
She’s fucking lucky that your raging hormones decided to take the morning off duty.
“You look different. I mean, you look great—”
“Ellie?”
“Yeah?”
“Just shut up and eat.”
“Deal.”
She shoots you a sheepish grin and sits down, scarfing down her food in her usual manner. 
“You get your fractions homework done?”
“Yeah.” Ellie huffs, rolling her eyes. “Took me forever. I was up until fucking midnight.”
Amused, you offer, “Want me to check your work?”
“Sure.”
As Ellie inhales the rest of her breakfast, you pull out a green, single subject notebook from her backpack and look over her homework for miscalculations.
“So, uh, how are you feeling?” she asks after a minute.
“I’m feeling alright. I think the morning sickness finally stopped, so can’t complain.” Shrugging, you close the notebook and stick it into her backpack. “You did good, kid. Only got two problems wrong.”
“Man, I really wish we knew whether it’s a boy or girl,” Ellie mumbles through a mouthful of scrambled eggs. “What do you want to have, anyway?”
“It doesn’t matter to me, Ellie,” you answer, honestly. Clocking the skepticism on her face, you laugh and say, “It’s true. As long as the baby’s healthy, that’s all I care about.” And you mean it. As an expectant mother in the post outbreak world where medicine is scarce, supplies are limited, and the closest thing you have to a hospital is the town’s old clinic, the only thing you can hope for is the smooth, safe delivery of a healthy child.
Before she can say anything, you both catch the sound of Joel’s heavy boots as he descends the staircase.
She quirks an eyebrow. “Uh, has Joel seen you yet?”
Grimacing, you shake your head. “No.”
“Well, I don’t wanna be here for all that awkward,” Ellie says, chugging the rest of her orange juice. She stands up and snatches up her backpack, along with her lunch bag, which you’d packed for her earlier that morning. Just as she’s about to whirl around on the heel of her sneaker and make a run for the front door, she pauses, watching as you make your way back over to the stove to light another flame. “Unless you want me to be?”
“I’ll be fine, Ellie,” you assure her. “Go on, get to school. Maybe you’ll be on time to class for once.”
“If you say so.” She wishes you luck and then bolts out of the kitchen, throwing a quick goodbye at Joel on the way out. “See ya later, old man!”
Nervously, you turn around and start cracking another two eggs into the pan. There’s no telling how he’s going to react.
Joel’s been fairly supportive since you’d found out you were pregnant, considering how unplanned it was. But you know him like the back of your own hand, and you know, despite the numerous times he’s denied it, that it has been weighing heavily on him. Each time you’d try to sit down to talk to him about it, he would brush you off and insist he was fine. But he wasn’t fine.
And you wish he would spit it out and tell you why.
In your periphery, you notice the stained glass butterfly he had hung in front of the window above the sink, the ornament catching and refracting the sunlight. Flecks of color dance across the walls in captivating patterns, brightening the space. You think of the sweet little girl he’d hung it for, the little girl he rarely talks about, that he keeps tucked away safely in his memory.
You bite back a small sigh.
By now, you’ve learned not to push him. Especially not about what he was feeling. He would tell you when he was ready.
“Who the hell lit a fire under her ass this mornin’?” Joel asks gruffly as he walks into the kitchen. “She ain’t ever this fuckin’ eager to go to school.”
“Not sure,” you reply in the most nonchalant tone you can muster as you use a spatula to scramble the eggs. Transferring them onto a plate, you add three strips of bacon, and then pour his coffee. “I have your breakfast ready, Joel. Have a seat.”
You hear a chair scrape against the tile.
“I keep tellin’ you I can make my own breakfast, darlin’.”
“And I keep telling you I don’t mind making it for you,” you quip, and you hear him grumble something under his breath.
Inhaling a deep, calming breath through your nose, you take the plate of eggs and bacon in one hand, and his cup of coffee in the other. Your fingers grasp the handle of his ceramic, owl mug in a near death grip. You exhale slowly, and then turn around to face him.
He sees your swollen middle and stiffens in his chair. 
The tension is instantaneous. Palpable.
Uncomfortable.
Awkwardly, you shift from one foot to the other.
“Your belly,” Joel murmurs, a visible tick in his jaw as his gaze drags over your midsection. “S’bigger.”
“Yeah. It is. Guess I’m going to have to start trading for maternity clothes soon,” you remark, shuffling over to the table. Setting down the plate and mug of coffee in front of him, you take a seat across the table. Your eyes try desperately to meet his, but they refuse. There’s no way for you to decipher what he’s thinking. You let out a small, nervous laugh. “Can you please say something?” 
He lightly clears his throat. “I’ll take you to Main Street on Saturday,” he tells you, picking up his mug. “I’ve got the day off from patrol. I’ll, uh, pick through some of my own things and see what I don’t need so we can make a trade for some clothes.” He pauses, then offers quietly, “In the meantime, you can wear my shirts. They might be more comfortable for you.”
You flash him a grateful smile. “Thank you, Joel.”
Sipping his coffee, he continues to avoid your gaze.
“Mhm,” is all he says.
Your smile falters.
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It’s the middle of August.
The afternoon heat is sweltering. Unforgiving.
“Jesus, it’s a fuckin’ scorcher,” Tommy sighs, glancing over towards the lake where his mare, Maxine, is taking a drink beside his brother’s stallion, Phoenix. His raven curls are damp with sweat, plastered to his forehead. “Hotter than the devil’s fuckin’ balls out here, ain’t it?”
He’s met with silence.
Looking over his shoulder, he sees Joel leaning against a tree, his rifle in hand as he stares at the Grand Tetons in the distance almost like he’s in a trance. “Joel?”
Blinking furiously, Joel shakes his head. “Sorry, you say somethin’ to me just now?” He asks in a daze, pushing away from the lodgepole pine. “We headin’ out?”
“You’ve been actin’ real strange all afternoon,” Tommy observes, walking towards him with his own gun slung over his shoulder. “Either the heat is startin’ to get to you, or you’ve got somethin’ on your mind, big brother.”
Joel hesitates. His dark eyes flit to the other side of the lake where the other members of their afternoon patrol group are refilling their canteens with water.
“S’alright,” his younger brother says. “Don’t worry ‘bout them. Can’t hear us.”
Joel’s chest heaves with a heavy sigh. “She popped.”
“Huh?”
“Her belly finally popped. She’s showin’ now.”
Amused, Tommy lightly shakes his head. “Y’shouldn’t be so surprised, Joel. Was ‘bout time,” he remarks with a shrug. “What is she—like six months along now?”
“She’ll be six months in a couple weeks.” Joel wipes the perspiration off his brow with the back of his hand and sighs once more. “Look, I ain’t stupid, Tommy. I knew it was bound to happen sooner or later, but it still caught me by surprise. When I saw her, it became real for me. She’s got my kid in there. I’m gonna be a dad again.”
“You’re scared.” It’s not a question, it’s a statement.
“Shitless,” Joel confesses, feeling his chest tighten. 
“What are you afraid of?”
Joel almost laughs.
He doesn’t know where to start.
He’s afraid of everything.
“All of it, Tommy. I’m afraid for her, havin’ to give birth with no medicine,” he tells him, his voice breaking. “I’m afraid I won’t remember what to do with a newborn or that I won’t know how to help her durin’ those first few months—”
“This ain’t your first rodeo,” Tommy reminds him. “You did it once, and you did just fine, Joel.”
“That was over three fuckin’ decades ago. And it was a different world. If Sarah—” He stops, taking a second to catch his breath. The image of his daughter’s little face flashing in his mind feels like a violent punch to the gut. Even after all this time, it still knocks all of the wind out of his lungs. “When her mom had trouble breastfeedin’ her, I could head to the grocery store and buy her baby formula. If she got a real bad fever, I could load her up in the truck and drive her to the emergency room.” He glances down at his broken watch. “Besides, I was a lot younger, then. And I wasn’t half fuckin’ deaf like I am now. When Sarah would wake up cryin’ in the middle of the night because she needed a diaper change, I’d hear her. What if I can’t hear my own kid cryin’?”
“Joel—”
“I’m in my fifties. What if I can’t keep up because I’m too fuckin’ old?”
Tommy reaches out, clapping a hand onto his shoulder.
“Brother, I need you to take a fuckin’ breath,” he says, chuckling softly. “You’re puttin’ the weight of the world of your shoulders right now—you need to put some of it down. Look, we might not have everythin’ we used to before the world ended, but we make do with what we do have. Considerin’ just how many growin’ families we have and how many little ones we’ve got runnin’ around our town, I’d say it’s workin’ out pretty fuckin well.” He gives his shoulder an encouraging squeeze. “And as far as your ability to be a good dad, you’ve still got it, Joel. You know what to do, and so does she. I’ve seen her in action with my little boy, and it seems like she’s already got those maternal instincts, y’know?”
“Yeah, she does,” Joels agrees quietly, thinking of how you had stepped up to help him care for Ellie.
“Trust me, between the two of you, it’ll be alright.”
He peers at him. “You really believe I still got it in me?”
“I do.” Tommy smiles. “You never stopped knowin’ how to be a father, Joel. You’re gonna be just fine.”
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Their patrol shift extends into the evening, turning into a double, and it’s late when he gets home. 
“What the hell are you still doin’ up?” Joel asks when he finds Ellie sitting at the kitchen table, cursing to herself as she flips through the stale, yellowing pages of an old life science text book.
“What does it fucking look like, man?”
“Shouldn’t have waited until the last minute, kiddo—”
Ellie holds up a hand and cuts him off.
“Save the lecture for another time, dude. I’m busy.”
Joel rolls his eyes. “Finish up and get to bed. S’late.”
Without waiting for some smartass response, he turns on the heel of his boot and then heads upstairs to your shared bedroom. He flips on the lights only to find that you’re already in bed, fast asleep, wearing nothing but one of his t-shirts and a pair of panties. He toes off his boots and leaves them by the door, being as quiet as he possibly can as he rummages through his top drawer for some clean boxers to sleep in.
He slips into the bathroom where he takes a quick, hot shower, scrubbing off that day’s sweat, dirt, and grime. After he’s dressed and his sopping wet, salt and pepper curls are haphazardly towel dried, Joel walks back out into the bedroom where he switches off the lights and climbs into bed next to you.
He lays on his side and he’s just about to close his eyes when he feels a light shift beside him. You roll over and curl into him, your belly pressing up against his curve of his spine.
He stiffens, freezing as if someone had just placed the barrel of their pistol against his back, their finger over the trigger.
Christ, get a damn grip, he thinks silently to himself.
Joel thinks about that morning in the kitchen.
He knows his reaction had hurt you. Or rather, his lack of a reaction. His shitty ways of coping aren’t your fault, and his struggle to come to terms with your pregnancy sure as hell isn’t your fault, either. He owed it to you to try harder to be the man you needed.
The man you both needed.
Joel’s train of thought comes to a screeching halt when he feels a soft flutter against his middle of his back, the spot right where your tummy is nestled—did the baby just move?
He lies still, waiting to see if he feels it again, and when he doesn’t, he rolls over to face you, causing you to stir.
“Joel?” you mumble his name, sleepily. “What time—?”
“Shh,” Joel soothes, pulling you into his bare chest. He kisses your temple. “S’okay, baby. Go back to sleep.”
He doesn’t have to tell you twice.
Within seconds, you’re asleep again, snuggled into him and snoring softly.
Lifting a hand, he hesitates, then rests it on your belly.
He waits.
And waits.
And waits.
And waits.
Until the minutes turn into hours.
Until dawn’s light filters in through the lace curtains. 
Until he finally feels that little flutter again.
He feels it against the palm of his hand. Faint, nothing more than a brief whisper against his skin, but there is no mistaking it.
He’d just felt the baby’s movement.
There’s a sudden shift.
Tense muscles that had been painfully wound up since the moment you’d mentioned to him your period was a week late back in the spring loosen slightly—the breath he had been holding since he’d picked up that positive pregnancy test from the bathroom counter finally falls from his lips, fanning over yours.
His fears, his worries, his uncertainties about what lies ahead, they’re all still there, of course, but he finds they are now accompanied by a glimmer of hope, a sliver of optimism that maybe, just maybe, Joel doesn’t have to be as afraid as he is.
Joel’s eyes glaze over your face, warmth radiating in his chest when you breathe a little a sigh of content in your sleep as he gently rubs your stomach through his shirt.
With his hand still splayed over your belly, he closes his eyes and begins to drift off, falling into the most decent sleep he’s had in the last few months.
Maybe his brother’s right.
Maybe he will be just fine.
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divider credit to @saradika 🤍
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rodeorun · 1 month
Text
love in the dark.
yandere pretty boyfriend x fem!reader.
cw: drugging, black-mail, non-con blowjob, degradation. Featuring @meo-eiru 's OC, Elias ❤️
MDNI.
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“You better work,” Elias threatened the baby pink candle he was holding between pretty, manicured fingers.
One might even compare it to the young man himself. Long and more thin than thick, the pink wax at the tip molded into a heart shape, white wick sticking through the middle. Elias always had love on the brain, at least when it came to you. Pity he didn't have a fine white wick of logic to split his head in two, or rather, his heart. But, when you love the way he did, weren't those two practically the same thing?
He doesn't know how many hours he spent on the dark web to find this, some sort of ‘love candle.’ Whatever that bullshit meant. The description the seller left behind was short and to the point.
‘Ignite this candle in the presence of your desired person and watch them fall in love with you.’
Even Elias in all his lovesickness found it hard to believe, but it was that sickness itself that led him to purchasing the item. He hadn't gotten a gig lately so he prayed for the payment to go through, giving himself a headache for purchasing a mere candle that was six hundred and fifty dollars. God, the things he would do for you (or to you, but that's a completely different matter.)
You, the object of his affections. His sweet, sweet, sweet best friend who has saved him more times than he could count. You were entirely too good for him and he knew it.
A special knock on his door alerted him to your presence, and he knew it was you because you two had created that very knock in sophomore year of university. Long after he changed his name, you still had the heart to played with him like a child. Where others laughed at his girlish tears and overgrown sobs, you healed his inner child with every hug, every whisper, every time you'd look into his eyes and tell him, ‘it's okay, Elias. I'm here for you.’
And you always were.
No matter how bad his tantrums got, you never got sick of him. You were the only one who stayed. You practically conditioned him. How could he ever want anyone else after tasting a drop of your sweetness?
“Hi, darling!” Elias opened the door and pulled you in for a hug, kicking the door shut behind you. “Someone's mighty dressed up for a movie night in, hehe. Oooh, is this wine? Gimme gimmie!”
Taking the bag from your hands, Elias turned to put it on the table, laying a sweaty palm against his flushed cheek. Heaven, he couldn't do this much longer! Just a hug from you and a whiff of that perfume had him hardening in his yoga pants. He stayed faced away from you as he rocked side to side, subtly rubbing himself against the bottle you brought just for him. All for him.
“So, I was thinking we could start with a rom-com and then maybe a western, for variety, and after that there's a three hour long horror movie I found that-”
“Sorry, Elias.”
Glittering eyelids opened themselves.
“See, my boyfriend injured his arm in a game yesterday, so I need to go help cook for him,” you explained. Your sorry eyes seared into his back.
Ah, yes. That boyfriend of yours. Taller than Elias, bigger than Elias, handsome enough to be called a heartthrob and an athlete by profession. A real winner, that boyfriend of yours!
Elias wanted to spit on his corpse.
“Oh, your boyfriend!” He clasped his hands together and turned to face you. “The one who forgot to pick you up at the mall last week because he slept through his alarm, right? I remember him.” Elias fiddled with one of the bottles of wine now, snarling. So much for a ‘gift,’ you were just trying to buy his forgiveness.
“Yes, Eli, that boyfriend,” you chuckled. “But I forgave him for that, you know? Nobody's perfect.”
The illusion of bliss he was swept up in from hearing that sweet nickname quickly shattered.
‘Nobody's perfect.’ Elias knew that better than anyone else. Afterall, he was the last thing but, and yet you still treated him so preciously.
So, why? Why was it the very same thing he fell in love with you for, you were flaunting to just anyone? Don't you know that love isn't free? Especially not yours! How many bottles of hair dye, micro-needling appointments, collagen fillers, and waxing appointments did he go to for your love? By God he knows his deadname didn't deserve you, but didn't Elias at least earn a little bit of your attention?
How dare you, honestly. How dare you show someone else the kindness you won him over with? How dare you waltz in here just to stand him up for another man! How dare you fucking-
“Eli?”
“Yes, my beloved?”
You looked upon him tentatively, a testament to what a ticking time bomb he is. “Oh, alright, I forgive you.” He waved you off playfully and walked over to hold both of your hands in his. “But next time, I'll tie you up and keep you here forever, munchkin~”
Your laugh mingled with his. As if you thought he was joking.
“Ah, but, darling! At least have a drink with me before you go. It would be lonely to pop open a bottle by myself, hm?”
A single drink.
That's what you and Elias agreed on. One glass and you'd be on your way to that wretch. You didn't drive to get here and assured Elias that your boyfriend would drive you back home. As if.
“Oh, before we cheers,” Elias put his glass down and went to rummage for a box of matches, shaking his hips this way and that while humming in his search.
“Someone's in a good mood,” you grinned, watching him groove to imaginary music.
“Yes, with you around I always am,” he teased and returned to the table. He put the candle in the stand and lit it.
It was only a little unsettling that he watched you instead of the matches while he did so.
“That's a really cute candle, Elias. Where'd you get it?” you asked him as he sat down across from you, drink in hand.
“Oh, this old thing? It's just something I had laying around- Oh my god!”
Elias flinched as the candle suddenly exploded, letting out a small puff of wind that blew his hair back and left behind a plume of pink smog.
“Darling?! Are you- ack! You okay?” Elias wafted the air between hacking coughs until he could see your face again.
You looked shocked, as one would when a candle explodes in their face, but then you started laughing. Small titters that rang like a bell until it turned into gasps that made you grab your stomach.
“You're, hahahaha, so, so silly, Eli! Haha, where do you get these things?!”
Oh, honey. He couldn't stop loving you even if he tried.
“Oh, stop that, you! How was I supposed to know it would do that,” Elias played along, ears still tinged pink at his little blunder. You two looked at each other and then fell into joined laughter.
This light, airy feeling was a drug to him. No matter how boring he was, how flat his personality, you could always find something more in him. Something to talk about, to laugh about, to entertain him with. Something he couldn't find by himself.
It's like the universe sent you to him as if to say, ‘hey! This is the person who will make life worth living! The one who will take that mind numbing emptiness away!’
And who was he to deny the wishes of the universe?
“Worthless piece of junk,” Elias muttered when things settled down. The candle really was a sham then. “At least it smells nice,” he lit the candle again and waved the match to out it. “Anyways, I got a manicure today and the lady was way too rough with my cuticles. She should quit if that's the service she's going to give.”
He brought his nails up, inspecting the blood red polish.
He was met with silence.
“Darling?”
Your head was down, lip trapped between your teeth.
“R-Right. Well, it's pretty,” you shot him a sad kind of smile. “It's just, well, no. Hm, uh, no…I forgot, I guess?” Elias watched you scramble around until small tears dripped from your eyes. “I guess I just forgot that you see other women every day.”
His heart froze in his chest.
“And, I, I know she was just doing her job, but holding your hand while she did your nails- she did hold your hand, right? That's a little…”
You trailed off and wiped your tears, willing yourself to gather such thoughts while Elias looked on in shock.
His eyes flicked to the candle, to you, the candle, you. Always you.
“She did,” he said simply, cautiously, “hold my hand. Yes, she did.” Your face cumbled, making Elias shoot up. “But I hated it! I wished it was you! I want you to be the one holding my hand!”
“Really?” Those big, wet eyes pleaded with him. “Because, I get jealous, you know.”
Something below his belt started stirring.
“Is that so?” He hummed and pulled his chair over next to you, thumbing the tears under your eyes like you had done for him so many times before.
The light of the candle reflected in your eyes and when Elias glanced over, it had melted remarkably quickly. The leftover wax dripped onto the table but he couldn't care less.
First things first, he needed to make sure what he hypothesized was real. That this wasn't a ploy.
“You know, dear, I was very hurt when you started going out with that bastard. You hurt me, a lot. How do you think I felt?” He cooed like you were a child, soft and gentle in his palm.
“I'm so sorry, Eli. I'll break up with him, okay? I only want you! I'm really- mmph!”
Not the romantic first kiss he was dreaming of, but perfect nonetheless.
All this groveling and begging, over little ol’ him? It was too cute. He could just eat you up! But before that, it seems Elias was going to be devoured first.
“Darling? Ngh!” You were tangling your tongue with his, sucking his lips, his cheeks, his tongue, leaving little nibbles on his blushing skin. “Hold on, I need to-”
“Need to what, Eli? I need you right now,” you swallowed, “I feel like my body is on fire.”
Oh, god, the candle really did work. You were squirming on your chair, rubbing your legs together and giving him the absolute cutest puppy eyed stare. You wanted him. You wanted him.
“Yeah?” Elias said breathlessly, trying to keep pace with you, “well I think I need an apology for you cheating on me first.”
He stood up and pulled his oversized sweater up, letting you peek at the bulge growing underneath tight grey cotton.
“Oh, Eli! It's so pretty!” You weren't shy about rubbing him over his pants. “All of you is so, so pretty, baby. Can I…suck you?”
“Darling, I'm yours!” He said eagerly, the sudden onslaught of praise leaving him dizzy. “Anything you want to do, I'm yours!”
By the time you peeled down his pants and had his leaking dick positioned at your mouth, he was ready to burst. He was entirely ready to finally get his reward, but you hesitated.
“Wait, Eli. I think we should wait, um…my boyfriend. I should break up with him first.”
That goddamn candle should have come with a special feature to make you forget anyone but him all together.
Elias probably looked terrifying right now, fine features underlit by the glow of the candle, staring down at you harshly. For once, he didn't find your babbling cute. Not when every other word was your boyfriend's name. So, Elias kindly shut you up.
“There we go~” Elias cooed, thrusting his hips a little. “Ah, ah, darling. Don't run from it,” he giggled, “or I'll shove it down your fucking throat~”
You were choking on his cock, unable to pull away with how he had his fingers locked behind your head. More than you moving, it was Elias who was pumping himself in and out of your mouth, not stopping until his balls slapped against your chin every time.
“What a good little thing you are, angel. I love you so much! Hey, do you love me too? I asked if you loved me too!”
Even under the effects of the candle, you looked scared. Elias was frantic now, not only his balls hitting your chin, but his toned abdomen smashing into your face as he fucked your entire head roughly. “Dirty fucking bitch! I trusted you! I love you and you left me for dead to go date that idiot! Do you know how much that hurt me?! How much I need you?! You were supposed to me mine, all mine, just like I'm yours! You dirty, dirty f-fucking whore!” Elias let out a wet sob, spilling down your throat with his eyes screwed shut.
Heavy pants left his mouth as he stumbled back to sit on his chair, chest heaving up and down. Even through your coughing, you couldn't help but worry about him.
“Eli? A-Are you okay?”
What a wreck your voice was, no doubt you'd be feeling him in your throat for days.
“It's not all out.”
“Huh? I don't understand-”
“Lift your shirt up.” He wasn't asking.
The smooth expanse of your chest was revealed and Elias used it as extra motivation to get the last few drops of cum out, fisting his tip roughly to pull out those last thick strings. It pearled on your skin beautifully and you didn't hesitate to stick your tongue out, cleaning him off properly with soft sucks that made him tremble.
“Good girl,” he sighed and eventually sat. It was like the devil was released from him. He was just Elias again, your Eli. “That was my first blowjob, you know,” he giggled cutely, like you two were mischievous kids sharing secrets in a treehouse.
Elias sighed and leaned in to hug you after lifting his pants back over his soft length. “Oh, my baby. I can't believe this worked. Had I known, I wouldn't have done this sooner. I can't believe you're finally mine,” he mumbled into your hair. “I love you, darling. And you love me too, right?”
Silence.
“Darling?”
Elias held you at shoulder length away, not wanting to let go of you completely yet. “Hey, why the tears, darling? Hehe, do you love me that much? Aw, well-”
“I'm sorry, Elias.” Your dark pupils met his.
There was no reflection from the candlelight anymore. In fact, the flame had blown out completely by now, leaving behind a sad little puddle of wax.
Your arms pushed his off as you stood up. “Shit…I- oh god, my boyfriend. What's wrong with me?! I'm sorry, Eli- I mean, Elias, um, I think the wine was a bit too strong for me. I really didn't mean to…”
What the hell was this?! Was this- did your love only last while the candle was lit?!
“What the fuck!” Elias cursed loudly, fingers gripping his silky tresses. The situation was beckoning a meltdown.
“I know, Elias, I'm so sorry, but I don't know what came over me!”
You were scared, he could see it. And he's sure part of that fear was from the ache in your throat, the names he had called you when he was at the peak of bliss. How he carried on when he was so sure you were his completely. Over what, a stupid candle? He was an idiot! He had to do damage control.
“It's…alright, darling. It's okay. Hm,” Elias hummed as he thought, standing up to pace. “It's okay. Your boyfriend is waiting for you after all, run along now. It's getting late.”
“Elias?” You weren't sure what was going on.
“Don't worry, dear,” Elias looked at you with warm eyes. “I can keep a secret. We just got a little overwhelmed, didn't we?”
He was giving you a way out, obviously. But why?
“Right,” you said, unsure.
“That's okay, we all have our moments,” Elias giggled and walked over, wrapping his arms around you, letting one sneak down to cup your ass. “Some more than others.”
“I don't think we should be-”
“Be what? You already swallowed my load, pumpkin. Let it dribble all down your chin and everything,” he mused, rubbing a finger against your lower lip. “Or did you want to come clean to your boyfriend?”
“No! I really don't know what happened!”
“Then it's a secret,” Elias whispered, pulling you in for a kiss. You were helpless to him, unable to pull away under the looming threat of him snitching on you. His tongue traced your lips before he pulled away.
“I won't tell if you won't, darling.”
Elias sent you off with a few more kisses and a slap on your ass, already hard again and humping you like a dog all the way to the door where you left with tears in your eyes. You were just too cute!
It wasn't much, but it was something. The only excitement Elias could offer you. Now, he had a personality.
He was your secret lover.
“Aha! How wonderful!” Elias twirled around in excitement. What an adventure!
Soon, he'd guilt your sweet soul into breaking up with that idiot and you'd be all his. He already had a foot in the door after all.
Bringing a hand to his lips, he recalled the way yours felt against his. Marvelous, absolutely marvelous!
Hmm..
Elias took his phone out and sent you a quick text.
‘I think I left some lipstick on you, darling. Clean that up before you see you know who ;)’
Not even moment later, his phone rang.
“Hey, Elias?”
“Eli,” he corrected.
“Yeah, can you not-”
“Eli.”
“…Eli. Uh, can you not send texts like that, please? Just in case he sees.”
A shiver ran up Elias’ spine at the secrecy of it all. You two were bound by sin.
“Of course, darling. I'll call you tonight then.”
“I'm spending the night with him,” you said nervously. “I can't.”
“Alright then, I'll just text you,” Elias inspected his nails casually.
“But-! Ugh, fine. I'll call you later.”
“Perfect. We'll talk soon then. Make sure your camera is on, I'm still throbbing over here,” he giggled.
“I have to go now,” you whispered.
“I love you, darling.”
“Yes, he's coming so-”
“I said I love you!”
“…I love you too, Eli. Bye.”
Elias waited for you to hang up with a smile. You were already cracking under the pressure of your unwanted affair. Sure it would hurt you now, but if this didn't last long then it would be him hurting later. Surely, you wouldn't be able to deal with that, not your kind heart. After all, his beauty is something that shouldn't be marred, you said so yourself.
It was only a matter of time now.
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a/n: I actually finished this over a week ago but the Elias lore kept pouring in and I was scrambling to edit to make this as canon as possible but I gave up sooooo, yeah 😃 just imagine this as eli if he actually acted on half the shit he wants to do ig lmfaooo
Also can't believe I wrote unwilling reader because Elias is literally my baby muffin snuggly pie googlie bear and i love him, but i love men suffering more ig 💗
Divider: /animatedglittergraphics-n-more
Please do not ask for part 2. Thank you!
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daytaker · 9 months
Text
The Gang React to You Ignoring Them
Lucifer
"How childish. They'll have forgotten by the end of the day."
By the end of the day, however, Lucifer has reached his fucking limit. But his pride will not only prevent him from begging you to knock it off-- it will prevent him from even acknowledging in your presence that he is remotely bothered.
He probably goes to vent to Diavolo -- that is to say, visit him for tea and offhandedly comment about your immaturity for pulling such a stunt, knowing that he'll just contact you and beg for him.
Mammon
"Oh no you don't! MC! MC! MC! MC! MC! Hey! MC! MC! Hey! MC!"
He will follow you wherever you go. At first he thinks he's hilarious, being an absolute pain in the ass, but the longer it goes on, the more dejected he gets. His energy level tanks and soon he's just lying on top of the nearest piece of furniture and whining for you to stop it.
If you manage to get him off of you long enough to escape him, he will just text you.
Mammon: MC Mammon: MC Mammon: Hey MC Mammon: Hey Mammon: MC
If you block him, he will just text someone else until that person becomes so annoyed that THEY beg you to stop.
When you finally give in, he pretends like he didn't even care that much. It was just a little joke between pals, right? Haha!
Leviathan
"So this is how easy it is for you to just toss me aside like a piece of garbage."
Levi will take this extremely personally. Depending on why you're ignoring him, he might blame himself and enter a spiral of self-hate. He'll hole up in his room, refusing to leave until you finally come in and either apologize or forgive him, whichever is appropriate.
He'll spend a few moody minutes acting like it's too late for that, but soon he'll be on the verge of tears, making you to swear on a copy of The Tale of the Seven Lords that you will never pull that kind of thing again.
Satan
"Really? Is this what it's come to? You understand how pathetic this makes you look, don't you?"
Like Lucifer, he won't be too bothered at first, assuming you'll get over things relatively soon. But if nothing has changed within an hour or two, he'll start to get testy. He'll send a text, sit in the same room as you and stare a hole through your head, and if you're still ignoring him after a while of that, he'll storm up to his room.
Depending on how emotionally charged the incident was that led to you ignoring him, he will be more or less capable of fending off an explosion of temper. Most likely, any acknowledgement you toss his way will ease the tension, so it might be a good idea to just shoot him a text asking him not to destroy the house, please.
Asmodeus
"But it's impossible to ignore me! You can't look away from a face like mine! See?"
I don't think you can ignore Asmo. Being the literal Avatar of Lust with powers to charm and an intense need to be admired and adored, he simply exudes an aura that demands attention. You should probably come up with a different strategy of attack.
Beelzebub
"...Are you mad at me?"
Why would you do that to him? How could you be so cruel?
If you did do it, it would probably confuse and sadden him. Confusion and sorrow both make him feel hungry, so he will go ahead and start eating his feelings within an hour of the silent treatment. Even if you're content to allow this to continue, the other six demons in the house aren't, and you will ultimately have no choice but to make up with Beel.
Belphegor
belphie.exe has stopped responding
Considering you'd already forgiven him for the whole murder thing, he can't comprehend how you've become so mad at him that you'd go so far as to give him the cold shoulder. He won't know how to respond at first, but he will quickly become an angry, sulky ball curled up under the blankets on his bed. If it takes more than a few hours for you to come crawling back to him, things will start to change. Belphie will return to the common areas of the house, acting mostly the same as usual, and he will not spare you a second glance. Even if you stop ignoring him, well, two can play this game, and Belphie is absolutely petty enough to drag this one out.
After a day or two of you trying to talk to him, he'll relent. He'll feel kind of guilty, having worked through most of his anger while ignoring you. He'll probably text you a lot for the next day or two, just to ease some of his anxieties.
Diavolo
"I don't understand."
You can't do that. That's illegal. Next character.
Barbatos
"Hehe. What a troublemaker."
Barbatos likes it when you ignore him sometimes.
Barbatos will not change his behavior at all, ever. You could spend the rest of your life ignoring him, and he would simply accept it as one of those unfortunate circumstances life sometimes throws his way. He would prefer it if things didn't go down that way, though. Basically, he'll let you come to him whenever you've gotten over whatever it is you're upset about. What a king.
Solomon
"Hmm? Are you sure that's a good idea?"
Solomon will act pretty much the same as usual around you too. He'll point out that you're ignoring him to whoever else happens to be around and bemoan the situation, but he won't actively appeal to you. Instead, he'll orchestrate a scenario that traps you in a situation where he is the only person you can go to for help. As soon as you do that, he'll act as if nothing ever happened. If you resume the silent treatment, well, he can always come up with another scenario.
Are you still sure it's a good idea?
Simeon
"I didn't realize you were so upset. I'm sorry (that/if) I hurt you."
Simeon will either immediately understand why you are doing this, in which case he will apologize (using "that") or he will have absolutely no idea what's going on, and he'll still apologize (using "if") to be on the safe side.
If you don't show any signs of breaking, he'll enlist Luke's help to make you an apology dessert of some sort. And how can you stay mad at him when he's offering you angel food cake with such a sad expression?
Luke
😧😠😣🥺😢
Wh- Whaaa...?! How dare you ignore him! That's so mean! It must be all the demonic influences rubbing off on you! Stop it! Stop it or he's going to tell Simeon!
And then he'll go and tell Simeon. Simeon will probably tell him to just wait until you've calmed down. If he thinks you're being unreasonable, though, he'll probably have a talk with you himself. Really? Pulling the silent treatment on an actual child? Sure, he's a millennium old, but he's still a child.
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luviestarz · 1 year
Text
jeon jungkook fic recs!
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❁ romantic dreams | jeon jungkook - @kooktrash (he’s always dreamt of finding his soulmate in some romantic way, bells ringing, birds chirping, maybe even a shine of light over their head. he never imagined to find them living next door to him with absolutely no clue to the extent of the growing infatuation he has toward you until it’s a little too late. hypnotized by your entire existence he finds his dreams and delusions of love to be a little too intense for anyone to bear.)
❁ Toned, Tanned, Fit & Ready - jungkook - @thvhoe (Jungkook loves acting like the word "Pain" doesn't exist in his vocabulary.)
❁ redamancy - jjk (part II) - @lesgetittkookie (jeongguk is just a normal dude with a simple routine. wake up, go to the gym, work his job as a waiter at this posh upscale restaurant in the heart of gangnam before coming home to a night full of video games and ramen (it's delicious and cheap). that routine gets disrupted when he accidentally taps the back of an expensive sports car of one of the richest men in south korea. considering he's broke, he couldn't afford to pay for the damages so the man makes a deal with him by offering him to work at his house as one of the gardeners. jeongguk takes it but wasn't prepared to meet this beautiful young woman who's constantly lounging by the pool, you, the rich man's daughter.)
❁ guys my age | jeon jungkook - @kooktrash (a summer spent at your friend’s place wasn’t something to be anything to look forward to. her hot, young dad would seem to change that for you when you decide a game of teasing would suffice your boredom. you got more than you bargained for when you realize he’s not a fan of games.)
❁ perfect timing. - jungkook - @delugguk (one night in a city full of life; what it's supposed to be a friendly and fun dinner date, ends up with a night full of unrevealed secrets and unexpected pleasure.)
❁ ⤷ seven days — jjk - @jvngkoos (jungkook does everything to make you forgive him for seven days, will you pity him and accept his apology?)
❁ visions - jungkook (yandere) - @trivia-yandere (you’re convinced by your friends to go to a party and let go of the memories of your ex just for one night. unfortunately for you, jungkook doesn’t want to be let go.)
❁ ⤷ got her skippin’ work — jjk - @jvngkoos (trying to go to work is an everyday challenge for you with a boyfriend like jungkook, and it’s one of those mornings where he does anything and everything to keep you in bed with him)
❁ ego season masterlist | jjk - @sparklingchim (your ex-high-school crush is now your fuck buddy. you just gotta make sure that your older brother taehyung, jungkook's best friend, doesn't catch you red-handed.)
❁ Devoted to Trouble - @jeonsweetpea (In which the whole world finds out Jungkook is Spider-Man, but he doesn’t care about anything but you. OR Can you survive seven days of Jungkook pining over you while his identity is exposed to the world?)
❁ RAINY DAYS | JEON JUNGKOOK - PART ONE - @rklve (your life choices left not only yours, but jungkook's heart broken in peaces. now you're back in town, and just like pluto, even if it's cold and dark, he tends to orbit around his sun forever.)
❁ seven days a week | jjk (m) masterlist - @jjkeverlast (jeon jungkook has always had crazy ideas, but wanting to fuck you every day of the week was the last thing you expected.)
❁ blueberry haze | jjk - @caelesjjk (he had been eye fucking you from the stage all night. but you never expected anything to come of it. but when you run into the beautiful blue haired drummer after the show, you decide to let him show you some of his other talents.)
❁ cabin fever | jjk (m) - @jeongi (trapped in a cabin with your ex-best friend jungkook, you’re forced to overcome the fallout between you two.)
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sinsirellaxx · 5 months
Note
Toxic!Slytherin boys when they realize that if they don't make an effort to change, they will never fully win the heart of the person they believe to be the love of their life.
Slytherin Boys – when they realize that they could lose you if they don't make an effort to change
Warnings: toxic boys, being their toxic selves.
Mattheo …
… would struggle so much. He would be in complete denial and think that everyone else was trying to force you apart until you finally broke down in front of him because of something he had said. His eyes had widened when he heard you whimper as you cried. And that was the first time he actually questioned himself.
…  was plagued by nightmares that night, when he laid in bed. Nightmares of losing you. In the morning, he had to accept the truth: He was going to lose you if he didn’t change.
… would change slowly, as it proved to be more difficult to let old habits die than he expected. He wouldn’t talk about it or apologize to you in fear of making you realize what big of an asshole he had been to you – he couldn’t risk losing you. He would only apologize and tell you he’d change if you were to fight.
Theodore …
… is confused when you angrily shut the door behind you, standing in the middle of his room, all alone, with his mouth agape.
… would immediately take it back a notch and suppress the urge to control and manipulate you.
… would apologize to you with tears in his beautiful eyes as he lifted your hands to his face to press kisses onto every single finger.
… would not be as cocky and arrogant as usual after being ignored by you for days – because for the first time ever, he was scared of losing you.
… would buy you flowers every day – he would even make the lemon biscotti his late mother used to make him to cheer him up.
“My mother used to make these for me to express her love for me and I hope it conveys the same message to you. I’m so sorry, amore. I was wrong – please forgive me.”
Lorenzo …
… would be dead-serious when he realized you were drifting away.
… would try everything to tighten his grip on you – which backfired at first. While he was trying to pull you closer, he pushed you even further away with his clinginess.
… would have to confide in his friend, for he couldn’t find a balanced way to change but he wouldn’t be satisfied with their feedback.
… in the end he would sit you down and talk to you – heart to heart. He would push aside his pride and talk about his insecurities with you and tell you that he wanted to change.
… had been scared at first – thinking you would laugh into his face. However, it seemed to be the right thing to do as you seemed to melt away at his vulnerability, throwing your arms around him in a warm embrace.
“Thank you, love. I’ll be better, I promise.”
Draco …
… panics.
… is frantic because he does not know what to do. What were you expecting of him?
… would be too proud to ask you.
… asks his mother instead, who is disappointed by her son’s behavior.
… will think about his mother’s words after the hour-long lecture that he had to sit through and will try to apply some of her advice.
… will work really hard to make things right.
“I’m sorry for neglecting your feelings, princess.”
Blaise …
… knew it was coming.
… knew that you were smart and that you would probably be fed up with him if he went too far – which he apparently did.
… he’d be at your door the next morning after the fight, ready to do whatever you asked of him.
“Babe, I truly love you – please forgive me. I know you love me too. So, please … give me another chance.”
Tom …
… refuses to change.
… does not recognize his mistakes or wrong-doings – he thinks you’re being overly sensitive and dramatic.
… is a legilimens and uses his abilities to his advantage – if he finds out that you are too weak to leave him – too in love – he’ll never change.
… however, if he is worried, he’ll entertain your wish for him to change occasionally.  Giving into some of your demands once in a while if it works out for him only to go back to his usual ways.
… will have you trapped that way. If you somehow try to leave him, he’ll still have his trusted wand to assist him.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about, doll. Now be a good girl and come here – you know I’d never harm you in any way.”
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