#It's more likely he dies loved and forgiven than gets to live loved and forgiven

[moongothic]

In reference to this post; I was gonna reply in the comments but once again, it got too long, and I figured I might as well make a brief post about this because shit's interesting but the OG post was getting so long I didn't want to extend it any further. So. New post.

But I'm also going to make this a lowkey follow-up to this post, where I briefly talked about whether or not Crocodile is worthy of a redemption. Because I did have multiple people reply to it, mentioning they don't think Crocodile needs a redemption, which isn't wrong. Villian redemptions come down to personal preference (some people like them more than others generally speaking), and the specific circumstances of a character and the story they go through. (Personally, I am a fucking sucker for a good redemption story, and One Piece? Has how many redeemed villians? Kuma, Hatchan and Bon-chan? Perona too? Buggy and Mr 3 if we're generous??? I'm sure I'm forgetting someone, but the ratio is quite low is my point) The reason I want to bring that up again, is that depending on what Crocodile's trauma really boils down to (**since we don't know for sure what it is**), it could go against the very core messages of One Piece if he just dies without that trauma being resolved. And at the same time, if his trauma is what I think it is, then he can not heal from it without being redeemed. And the opposite is true as well, if his trauma isn't what I think it is, then he doesn't need to heal from it, and he doesn't need to be redeemed. I do have a whole separate post slow cooking in my drafts right now so I don't want to go too deep into that subject here and now. But the point is. If we want Crocodile to open up and be vunerable and heal from his shit, it means he's either getting a redemption arc or redemption in death. The latter is way fucking sadder, but again, a whole separate post.

BTW quick apology but I figured since there's a bunch of shit in this post that I've written about separately before, I might as well link to those posts for like context, so people can get where I'm coming from with my nonsense while keeping this post brief-ish

BUT ONTO THE ACTUAL SUBJECT As I have kind of mentioned before, I do think Crocodile probably has multiple layers of trauma going for him

We know losing to Whitebeard Did Things to his psyche for certain

I think it's very plausible he might've been betrayed by his former crew if he ever had one

I think it's likely Dragon didn't take too well to him transitioning

And between that and Crocodile already having tried to kill Luffy multiple times, he probably believes his son would never accept him as his other dad, especially since he already hates him.

(And I do think it's likely he might have some additional early childhood trauma based on how Oda writes these things normally but whatever that could be is an absolute mystery)

And if I'm right and those are (some of) the different layers of his trauma, then for Crocodile to open up and heal from it you'd need to do it step-by-step, layer by layer

I think Luffy accepting Crocodile would be the most important thing, above all else. Because if Crocodile loving and caring about his son is the only shred of humanity left in him, if Luffy is the only thing Crocodile cares about anymore while believing no one else will ever do so for him, then having that feeling returned is the key to getting Crocodile to just start to heal. If his son can't accept and forgive him then what would it matter what anyone else thinks? In my mind, Luffy is The Sledgehammer that can break Crocodile's walls.

But that's the first layer, the first step to getting Crocodile to become vunerable

If he does have that betrayal-based trauma, then I think finding people who would actually follow him and be loyal to him would help him heal on that front. And... This probably sounds strange, but I think Mihawk is the best candidate for it. Not just because he could be to Croc what Zoro is to Luffy (in many ways), and not just because of the Romancing SaGa 2 comparisons, but because Crocodile does already seem to respect Mihawk on some level. Like he specifically invited Mihawk to start Cross Guild with. IDK if they have like shared history before or if it's just because they're Fellow Former Warlords or simply because he knows Mihawk is strong and in a vunerable position (after losing his Shichibukai Rights) or what, but despite Crocodile saying he doesn't trust people, he seems to trust Mihawk enough to invite him. And he seems to respect Mihawk's opinions on things, like he might view themselves as equals. So if Mihawk, The Greatest Swordsman In The World of all people, genuinely expressed faith and loyalty to Crocodile... Yeah, I think that would do a lot for Croc. Especially if Mihawk found out about Crocodile's baggage and chose to follow him despite/because of it.

But if we want Crocodile to Heal ALL THE WAY. He and Dragon need to have a talk.

Which will not be easy, considdering like.

Look at that fucking expression on the panel on the right. Dragon is more than likely beyond furious with Crocodile over what he did in Alabasta. And for good reason. And frankly, I can't tell if they can ever come back from that.

(Sidenote, but this page these panels are from (from Chapter 1058) follows immidiately after the page where Buggy introduces Crocodile and Mihawk to Cross Guild, Dragon's placement on the bottom right of this page matching perfectly where Crocodile was placed in the previous page. So considdering what Dragon says and the expression he makes... Man, if there ever was a way for Oda to tell us what Dragon thinks of Crocodile without explicitly having him say it, yeah, this would be it)

And I'm sure that even if Crocodile got over whatever heartbreak might've happened between him and Dragon and just moved on... The fact that Dragon never called Crocodile and warned him about their son being a pirate, with a bounty, who might be on his way to the Grand Line, where he could stumble his way to Alabasta, where Crocodile was famous for his Pirate Crushing Heroics mind you... Yeah. Crocodile would have a perfectly understandable reason to be furious at Dragon too. He almost killed their son without knowing because Dragon never warned him, never told their son's name to him, never told his OWN full name to Crocodile.

So needless to say.

They have a lot of differences to overcome. Things they've done that they'd both need to look past, forgive and forget. Somehow. And I'd be lying if I didn't admit I'd find it damn near impossible to happen.

But can you imagine, if despite everything, Dragon still loved him? And was sorry about whatever the fuck happened 19 years ago? And didn't want to lose him again?

I think that would be the thing that would help Crocodile heal all the way in the end.

If Luffy is the first step, then Dragon is the last.

[dazai-ritualist]

Hi! I'm not the one that requested no one is better than I am.... BUT I loved it so much! I was wondering if you could make a part two say maybe the person we ran away with turns out to be abuse or something like that and we're kinda like 'I fucked up' and realize maybe running wasn't such a good idea.... Anyway you can add your own little twist and you can ignore this if you wish <3

- rose anon 🌹

AND I KNEW YOU’D COME BACK TO ME.

— this relationship wasn’t meant to last long. all is forgiven though. alastor will forgive you.

— tangled reimagined 😮‍💨 didnt even realize it until i finished writing HAHAHAHAHA

a month later, the honeymoon period had died out. to be fair, you hadn’t exactly made a plan…crashing at a motel on the edge of mississippi, not exactly what you had in mind.

living off the scraps of what you took, pawning off your belongings. oh, this was not ideal at all. and, how your lover got when he was angry; he’d bruise your arm from gripping way too tightly whenever you didn’t get enough money. how you started to miss alastor, it’s true what they say— you don’t know what you have until it’s gone.

if you were able to run once, perhaps you could just one more time? he is not as smart as alastor, you should be able to get away easily in the night.

yes, you should. after trading away many of your items, all you have left is but a satchel worth of dresses. new orleans is not particularly far with a car either.

and so, a familiar memory of running away at the dead of night. only now, it is you returning to alastor, just like he knew you would.

when you returned home, it was 2 AM. the house was just as it was when you left, albeit quite dusty now without your care.

you dropped your satchel on the dining table, just as you left it. it’s almost as if your home was abandoned when you left.

in the bedroom, your husband, sleeping peacefully— an arm clinging to your side of the bed, as if holding onto what little scent of you there was left.

when you opened the bathroom door, a silk nightgown was hung, simply waiting to be worn.

after you had changed, you sat back on your bed, the familiar smell of home coming back to you. as you laid in bed, you found yourself facing alastor.

your hands moved to bring him closer, the warm touch waking him scarily quick. “my love, you’ve returned.” he smiled, bringing you close.

your muscles tensed at the pet name, frightening reminders of the last month coming back. “hey, calm down, dear. i’m not mad.” he reassured you, awfully calmly at that. “running away; it was a mistake, wasn’t it?”

you nodded as you relaxed under his touch. “he was awful… im sorry, alastor…” you frowned. “oh, darling, i told you, didn’t i? no matter, all is forgiven.” he cooed, brushing your hair gently with his nimble fingers. “i’ll protect you from all that is bad in this world. no evil will meet you as long as i live. all i ask… is that you stay here, with me, forever— take care of our house, cook dinner, and perhaps even care for our little ones in the future?” he rambled on, a wide smile upon his face as he thinks of your future together. “ah, i’m rambling, we can discuss that in the future. in the meantime, could you do that, dear?” he asked, offering it to you as if you had a choice.

you nodded, not even looking at alastor. “good. i love you very much, don’t you know that, my dear? all i want is for you to be safe.” he told you. “…i” you started, thinking carefully of your words. “i love you too, alastor…” you said.

did you truly love him? of course you did. he took you back after you betrayed his trust, he’s a wonderful husband.

the moment the words fell from your sweet lips, a wide smile found its way onto alastor’s face. a kiss pressed upon your forehead.

his little doe finally returned his affections. it’s only a shame of his that he had to hurt your delicate heart first.

why would a single man be in a luxury store? oh, words cannot describe how thankful alastor is for your foolish naivety.

word on the street, that eugene was quite the heartbreaker. not to mention, that criminal record of his.

convincing him to go through with it wasn’t hard either. seeing a new toy that knows nothing of his record, he was more than eager to play with you. all it took was a bit of cash for him to keep up the sweetheart act.

and now that his doe was home, there’s no use for trash like that man in this world. the bruises on your arm, they were not what was intended.

all he asked was a simple grab, but it seems he got carried away, that piece of garbage.

as alastor forcefully swallowed his anger, he held you close, massaging the bruises on your wrist. “rest well, darling. you’ve been through a lot this past month.” he cooed, slowly lulling you to sleep.

oh, how excited he is that his little doe is home. to celebrate, we need a special meal, don’t we? say, there is a rare meat that alastor has been dying to try.

[tsams-confessions]

Not so short confession about Eclipse and the entire TSAMS lore: Eclipse was only the bad guy because everyone treated him like one.

Hate me all you want, but was prooven with KC, Solar, old Moon, Lunar (who is technically all that was good inside Eclipse) Ruin, heck, even with Sun that with a TINY BIT of love and care, anyone can change for the better. Solar needed his Sun to care about him in the start, and he never became a bad guy, even after his Sun died. KC needed, what? A 10 MINUTES LONG FRIENDLY CONVO with Glamrock Freddy, and after that he overcame his base coding. Old Moon sacrifised himself to not kill anymore person, giving KC and himself a chance in life to be better. Ruin was saved because new Moon and Sun risked their lifes and only way back to their home to get the cure for Ruin, even though Ruin brought Bloodmoon back, blew up the daycare and tormented them worse than Eclipse. Sun didn't go insane and potentially more suicidal because Earth showed up (I don't think he would've survived the guilt of loosing Moon without her). And Lunar... Eclipse got rid of his part that cared and wanted to be more than a villain, the part of him that longed for love and understanding... and to be fair I would be mad too if I was doomed to be a villain, and then the people who wronged me accepted my scrapped loving part without hesitation (which I scrapped because I hated I cared about said people) while I never got a chance to show I can be better. This doesn't justify what Eclipse did, because he still killed Lunar. Imma say it louder so everyone will understand: THIS DOESN'T JUSTIFY WHAT ECLIPSE DID TO LUNAR, BECAUSE IT WAS HORRIBLE AND WRONG IN SO MANY LEVELS!!!

But who didn't hurt/traumatize/killed their loved ones here? Old Moon was hardcore abusive with Sun and started this whole Eclipse problem (Moon cared still, but that doesn't excuse what he did to Sun), Sun killed Bloodmoon and hate to say it but he killed old Moon too without wanting to, KC, who was literally redeemed and forgiven killed probably hundreds of innocent people. Sun even gave Bloodmoon one last chance to be redeemed, but Eclipse? This mf died while trying to warn the only people he still somehow cared for, no matter how scrapped he was. He was begging to be heard out, not giving a flying fuck if Sun hurts him (and sidenote, even when Moon threatened to kill Eclipse, he accepted it, just wanted to be heard out, while Solar, when his Moon was truthfully wanting to kill him, he killed his Moon. Eclipse didn't even bother). He could've use the star to stop Sun, and he didn't.

And that's what I love in the lore of TSAMS, because this doesn't seem unintentional. Every now and then it's shown and prooven that with a tiny bit of understanding and love, ANYONE can change. All of the main characters (except for Earth and Lunar) did horrible things beforehand, and the only reason they stayed sane and didn't go down on a bad path on the long run because they had love and support by their side. Eclipse died TWICE, and even though it was confirmed by a celestial being who WATCHES THE ENTIRE COSMOS that this Eclipse is not the one who killed Lunar, he still payes the prize of V1 and 2 Eclipse's actions. And honestly... I don't understand new Moon and Solar, the two genius of the current lore: what do you expect from this copy of an Eclipse? He is a literally badly put togther scrapped dude who lives with horrying memories and has no idea why he lives. JUST MAYBEEE, if you'd give him a system repair, he would be less violent and more capable of helping you? Maybe? Oh yeah right I forgot that there is one universal rule throughout all dimensions: we hate and overvillainize our og Eclipse, because anyone deserves a chance in life, expect him.

And again, I'm not trying to protect Eclipse from hate or justify what he did, because he indeed became a villain. But what about everyone else? How come everyone else's action were forgiven and got a chance to be redeemed but not him? I'm not saying everyone should forgive him, heck Lunar has all right to never forgive him! But this Eclipse didn't do the actions he gets the blame for, and he would deserve to finally have more than just hate poured onto him. They don't have to forgive Eclipse, but if KC got a chance and Sun was WILLINGLY wanting to give a chance to Bloodmoon too, Eclipse has all right to get his redemption, because with Solar, it was prooven all an Eclipse needs is love and understanding.

.

[queerfandomtrifecta]

Bottle It Up: the most tangible theme in OFMD s2

So looking at s2 through the (super fucked up) lens that Jim asking Frenchie “How are you handling all of this so well?” And Frenchie responding by saying he puts all the terrible things in a box in his mind and never opens it again was the lesson everyone was supposed to learn this season and like, that’s there in the text more than anything else and I hate that.

Frenchie is handling everything well because he’s putting it in the box and never addressing it again.

Izzy finally says he has love for Ed, everyone is worried about him, the atmosphere is toxic and suggests talking it through and Ed goes on deck and points a gun at everyone as he asks them to talk about it, and when Izzy finally does address the reality of things and speaks Stede’s name aloud he gets shot in the leg.

Lucius isn’t talking about what happened. Avoidant about the Rat Boy name at first, says he fell off the ship, can’t remember when he picked up smoking.

Stede asks Lucius to talk to him about what happened after he was pushed off the ship, and Lucius starts to and almost immediately Stede runs away saying to save the rest for Pete.

Lucius says he talks to Pete and Stede says “please tell me you held back on some of the darker stuff” and Lucius confirms he did because Pete got nauseous and started crying.

Lucius tells Stede he should look past the man he loves and examine all the awful things he did, but Stede brushes it off and doesn’t do that.

No one will tell Stede they killed Ed. (Arguably this is for their own safety as well but it fits the whole “we’re not talking about the hard stuff” theme so I’m including it)

Ed finds out Stede went home to Mary through Anne Bonny. Stede begins to try to explain but instead, Ed smashes his chair against the wall and walks off. They have a very brief conversation with mention that Stede was kidnapped by Chauncey then watched him die.

Ed gives his influencer non-apology that was clearly written by Stede to the crew, and everyone but Lucius and Izzy seem to have forgiven him. During the “apology” Jim talks about how it made them feel and Stede shushes them so Ed can keep not apologizing. Afterward, for some reason, Jim says immediately says “I thought it was pretty solid for him” Archie says that’s how it goes in situations like this, Roach has never heard an apology before so they’re all good apparently now.

Lucius pushes Ed off the ship but isn’t okay yet. We’re addressing the trauma here and trying to make it right (even if it’s in a messed up way); we’re finally talking about it directly, but Lucius isn’t okay after this.

Fang tells Ed he’s not mad at him because he got it all out of his system when they beat him to death.

The whole Lucius/Izzy exchange “A shark did this to me. Dangling my legs over the side of the ship, served me right too.” “Okay, that seems healthy. Using a bit of fiction to cover up your trauma.” “Not moving on is worse.” (Another point at which Lucius wants to resolve trauma and he’s told no, don’t talk about it)

Lucius is clearly coping poorly and tries again to talk to Pete about how he almost died and Pete says he should find him when he’s no longer thinking about his trauma (“find me when Blackbeard isn’t living rent free in your head”) and that Lucius should talk about how he lived instead. Lucius then seems to decide that he’s fine, proposes to Pete, and is seemingly okay after that. (5th point in the story when Lucius tries to talk about something to heal and is told no in some way, and here is when he finally seems to moves on and is played as “better” after this)

Izzy’s drinking a lot even after he’s not totally dysfunctional like at the end of ep4.

The only Ed apology to Izzy is “Sorry about your leg.” With no eye contact as he’s walking away. To which Izzy responds “Fuck off.” After Ed’s out of ear shot.

Stede suggests Ed can absolve himself of everything by “turning the poison into positivity” and selling his treasure he got during the time he was abusing the crew to buy party supplies. Stede later says at the party that yes, Ed has achieved turning the poison into positivity, though Ed has done nothing by throw money at the problem.

Stede ignores Ed’s warning about not being able to come back from killing in cold blood and kills Ned Low.

Stede is visibly upset and Ed goes to check on him and begins to start talking, but Stede wordlessly grabs him and slams him up against a wall and then they have sex (which Ed has requested to wait on) instead of talking about it.

Ed decides he’s leaving to become a fisherman because Stede is infamous now and Ed’s been wanting out of that life so there’s a brief disagreement where not much is said and then he leaves.

“I’m sorry I was such a dick.” Is the biggest apology we’ve gotten all season. It’s immediately dismissed as “you’re not a dick. Life’s a dick.”

No one in the crew seems to be mourning Izzy’s death and we as the audience seem expected to move on from it very fast. Avenging his death is proposed by Zheng but then it cuts to nope, we’re done with that and we’re inn keepers now instead. Put the terrible thing you’ve seen in the box and never open it again.

I’m definitely sure I forgot some of these and it felt at first that these were being set up to be played negatively because this is the don’t-bottle-it-up/healing-from-our-traumas show but that just doesn’t play out. Like so much of it’s either dismissed without reason, played as a joke, or framed as acceptable and the fact that I could pull so much more of this stuff out of the text than I could any other potential thematic element does has me just so baffled. I don’t know what to do with it.

[bethanydelleman]

Taking a break from my usual programming to talk about Megara from Disney's Hercules being an awesome, flawed, complex, female character who has a very compelling arc.

The backstory, given by Hades, is that Meg sold her soul to him so her lover could live, but he left her for someone else. This makes her one of the very few Disney women who actually has romantic relationship baggage and experience. She is also older than Hercules (I think unique in Disney) though I think she's still mortal and within a normal lifespan. But the point is, she thought had the "Disney princess" perfect sacrificial romance, but then was betrayed.

She does fall in love and begins to believe that Hercules is a really good person, which inspires her to be better as well. Then Hercules finds out that Meg has been working for Hades the whole time and is heartbroken and betrayed. Meg sacrifices herself to save him, JUST LIKE BEFORE, but this time, she did pick a better guy and her sacrifice was honoured. Hercules probably has a far better reason to abandon Meg than previous boyfriend, but he doesn't: he goes to the underworld, retrieves her soul, and then, in another huge personal sacrifice, opts to stay with her instead of joining the gods on Mount Olympus.

She is shown as cynical, amoral, and sarcastic; not seeming to mind that she's helping Hades attempt to overthrow the other gods. Even though she likes Hercules, she agrees to attempt to find his weakness when Hades offers her personal freedom (that seems to be lifted from the story of Delilah and Samson, by the way). While she is a slave to Hades, that doesn't fully excuse her actions because we learn that she can refuse to serve him. Her motivation seems to primarily come from her not really thinking humanity is worth saving after her betrayal.

I loved this movie so much as a kid and I think I imprinted on Meg like some sort of baby duck. I love her song, I Won’t Say (I’m in Love) and how she struggles to get over her cynical views of relationships and men. But now, I'm amazed that she exists at all. She's a femme fatal who tried to take down the hero of the story and she both survives and gets a happy ending! She commited the Ultimate Narrative Woman Sin: she used her sexuality against a hero! She does make a huge sacrifice, dying to save both Hercules and the world, but in most stories she would have saved him and died (permanently). Instead, she's completely forgiven and Hercules risks his life to bring her back.

I love her. I love her story. She's the best. Can we have more of her please?

[honeyhwaaa]

ateez - calling them by their full name (hyung line)

ateez x gn!reader

warnings: little bit of angst if you squint, other than that just fluff fluff and more fluff.

word count: 1.3k

note: this is my first post/writing ever! i am definitely taking any constructive criticism so please don't be afraid to lmk! all the love <3

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hongjoong: coming home after a long day of work and taking a long, and hot shower was originally the plan. pulling up in the driveway, you noticed hongjoong's car hadn't been there, meaning he was probably still stuck at work in the studio. brushing that thought off, you walked into yours and hongjoong's shared home to find his things by the door, and a trail of clothes leading to the bedroom.

carefully following the said trail, you walk upstairs inspecting the scene before you. hongjoong was covered in paint, head to toe, trying to make his way to the bathroom to (hopefully) wash it off.

"kim hongjoong!" you say, startling the poor covered man. "yah! you scared me y/n, what's with the full name card?" he asks, stripping the last of the paint covered clothing before stepping into the shower. you let out a slight chuckle at his current state, before joining him in the shower.

when you two exit the bathroom, both clean and dressed in clothes that didn't have paint on them, hongjoong proceeds to explain what happened.

"we were shooting a new wanteez episode, and i thought that we were just going to be playing another game like always. we hadn't even gotten ten minutes into shooting when wooyoung and san dumped buckets of paint on me!" at his explanation, you die laughing, holding onto the bed for support before going up to him and giving him a hug.

"as funny as that is my love," you say pulling away from the hug to face him, "i hope you know you are absolutely going to clean your paint trail up," he smiles and kisses you before going downstairs to clean his mess.

seonghwa: although you and seonghwa had been together for years, it just hadn't ever been feasible to live together given his schedule. your apartment was almost an hour from the studio, but regardless seonghwa always made the time and effort to see you.

it was a friday night, and the weekend was going to be the first one you've spent entirely with seonghwa in weeks. it was almost midnight, and he was supposed to be home hours ago. with the heavy thunderstorm brewing outside, you had grown worried whether or not your precious boyfriend was safe.

"hwa? you were supposed to home hours ago, are you okay?" you text him. after a few minutes he responds, "hi my love, i'm so so sorry for being late. we've been in the studio trying to get this choreography right for hours. i'll be home soon, i promise," he responds. keeping up your hopes of him being home soon, you stay awake waiting for him to walk through the door.

two hours pass, and it's pushing 3 am before seonghwa walks through your front door, drenched and shaking. you, still being awake, walk up to him. "park seonghwa! you had me worried to death!" you say, slightly panicked but upset at him for not keeping his word.

"baby i am so so sorry, the storm got so bad they wouldn't let us leave. the power went out and my phone died. please forgive me, i didn't mean to worry you so much," he says taking a step toward you. he looked at you before keeping his head down, and you knew he felt bad. "before anything, please go get in the shower so you don't get sick," you say before going to your room to bring him some dry clothes.

after he showers, you two sit on your couch. throwing on a movie, you brew him some tea and bring it to him. "please forgive me love, i really tried to get home to you," he says while scooting toward you on the couch.

"all is forgiven hwa, now finish your tea so we can go to bed," you say, cuddling into his chest.

yunho: sunday's were always cleaning days for you and yunho. you two always made sure to dedicate this day to keeping your shared house clean, and never skipped a cleaning sunday.

thankfully, yunho always found a way to make cleaning fun. with his golden retriever energy, he wasn't able to sit still or do some mundane task without adding a little bit of fun into the mix.

while you tasked yourself to cleaning the kitchen, yunho was busy in the living room. while putting away the dishes, you heard a small crash and an "ow!" accompanying it.

rushing to the living room, you find yunho on the ground behind the couch, rubbing his shoulder. "what happened in here?" you ask, before kneeling down to assist him.

"i was trying to dust the fan, but i lost my balance and fell," he says, looking sheepish. "jesus love, i thought you were really hurt," you say before helping him up and walking back to the kitchen.

yunho followed you, an idea popping into his head. he grabbed the duster, and stood next to you in the kitchen with it behind his back. "i believe you have a living room to clean mister, you're not getting out of your chores so easily," you say, glancing at him with a small laugh.

he then pulls the duster out, and begins to tickle you with it. laughing, you try to escape his grasp before he darts from the kitchen to another part of the house. "jeong yunho! you're not getting away with this!" you yell, before grabbing another duster of your own and chasing after him.

yeosang: yeosang was the loveliest person you've ever met. from his charms to his attentive personality, you loved absolutely everything about him. he only had one small flaw though, and that was never talking to you about his troubles.

you had come home from work early one day, after getting a call from jongho that yeosang hadn't been feeling well - physically and mentally. he didn't mention much aside from him thinking that yeosang hadn't been taking care of himself properly.

walking through the front door, you find yeosang laying on the couch, a cloth to his head and him in a bundle of blankets, obviously cold. he looked half awake, half asleep, and all you wanted was to take care of him.

walking up to his sleepy form, you touch his forehead - it's hot to the touch. "yeo? you awake honey?" you say, moving into his sight. he sits up, rather quickly, before looking at you. "oh, hey y/n. aren't you supposed to be at work? how come you're home so early?" he questions, looking genuinely confused.

"i got a call from jongho just a bit ago," you explain, "he told me you weren't taking care of yourself yeo. what's going on?" yeosang looks slightly uncomfortable, but doesn't voice it.

"i'm fine y/n, jongho's just being a bit dramatic is all," he says while moving to get up, and presumably head to the bedroom. "kang yeosang, get back over here," you say with your hand on your hip, looking at him expectingly.

he trudges back over the side of the couch, before casting his head down, not looking at you. you walk up to him, giving him a hug, but being careful not to squeeze too hard.

"love, it's my job to take care of you just as you take care of me. you know you can tell me anything, anything at all. i don't want you to hide things like this from me yeo," you say, your hands on either side of his face to get him to look at you.

"i know, i know. i'm sorry, i just don't want you to worry about me is all," he says with watery eyes. "it's okay, just come to me next time alright? i'll always take care of you honey," you say before leading the both of you to bed.

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thank you for reading! i'd like to start taking requests, so if you have any, please feel free to let me know!

[night-market-if]

Spoiler Ask

So I'm going to address it all here under the cut because I've gotten a few asks in that are pretty similar and I'm sure I'm going to get more. So I thought instead of answering the same thing over and over, I'd just do a response below. Warning, spoilers for the end of book 1.

Full disclosure. I am sick. We are going through a lot of family things at the moment. My patience is probably thin.

For everyone that says MC is already too forgiving of Milo. Milo has not even come into the story yet. You've only observed memories of him. If you feel like you need an inner dialogue to tell you how angry you are over this "betrayal" or "death", I don't know what to say here. Because MC is literally just observing things at the moment. Any options that have been put forth to comment on Milo and what has happened, have been more to lay ground work and to also give a scope of the type of emotions that will be offered in the game. But literally, Milo has not even shown up yet into the story in a real capacity. So please stop sending me asks about how you are upset that MC has "forgiven" him because there has literally been no real interaction between Milo and the MC.

As for this betrayal and death thing. I am going to state this now for those who aren't going to like where my story is going so you don't need to read if you don't want to. As the Night Market, you knew you were going to die. You gladly came down and wanted to experience death. You looked at what Milo (a non magic user) was doing, and said "hey, this would be a cool experience" and then you came down here. So, yes, you are going to feel the full range of emotions that come with it. But you are also going to need to take some personal accountability for your actions. That is what is going to be explored in this book. An entity that didn't realize what emotion actually meant, came down thinking it wasn't going to be a big deal to die, and it turned out it was a big deal. A big fucking deal, in fact and that by doing so, they actually hurt people they loved. So, don't forgive Milo. I'm not forcing anyone to. But, I will not be writing an MC that puts all the blame on him. Because guess what? The Night Market would have died if he didn't do what he did. So, everyone also saying that he killed the MC? No, he literally saved the MC and billions of people. And I don't care what way you spin it? One person is never worth a billion souls. And with the MC being someone that literally cut themselves open over and over again to save most of the people living within the world, I would think they would probably not be too keen on Milo sacrificing them so they could die together in some bullshit Romeo and Juliet act.

Now, I am all for exploring how an MC comes to terms with the feeling of betrayal along with the feeling of needing to take responsibility. I am all for exploring an MC that goes "holy shit this emotion thing is way bigger than I thought and I'm angry and confused". I'm there for it. I'm excited to write it. But, I will not be writing a willfully ignorant MC that doesn't take into account that they did this to themselves as well. And yes, if you choose to not acknowledge it in game, others are going to acknowledge it for you. If you want to not read because you can't become a villain, rock back and forth in a corner and weep, or violently get mad at someone who saved the world? That's cool. I'm not offended by someone not reading it. Anyone coming into my ask box and saying "I just am not going to read now because you aren't doing xyz" I wish you a good night and hope you find something else for you because there are thousands of stories out there.

I am not interested. Nor will I ever be interested. In writing a story where I add to the plague of ignorance that is this world. Aren't we kind of all struggling enough with that in our own lives? MC is a being of compassion. They will always be a being of compassion. That is going to shift and change based on circumstances and there are going to be moments where that compassion can fall into question. When it comes to Milo, it is going to be a messy bit of confusing emotions because there is so much more than just the black and white strokes of "OMG he killed me" that seemed to be the rhetoric on here. Now, you don't want his character around? Alright. Other than when you have to see him for Gatekeeper purposes, you probably won't.

To all of you guys complaining or sending me ask after ask stating how you don't like what I am doing. I am going to tell you this and it will not ever change. If you don't like reading this, then don't read. I am not here to write a story for you specifically. You don't like the direction of a work and can't ever broaden your scope of fiction to give it a shot? Then please don't. But to have this kind of messages coming through when literally we are a chapter in? Seriously. The instant gratification is bullshit. I'm going to suspect this is coming from the younger half of my audience who is way too accustomed to a confirmation bias internet algorithm and who has had a very small scope of real life. This is of course not all of the younger crowd but it's starting to seem like a pretty good amount.

I love having conversations with everyone. My discord is always open but most of you anons hide because you are far too scared to come at me with your user name or engage in a conversation feed where more than just me can answer. I mean, you guys send me asks, citing others user names, to call them out through me. It's laughable at this point.

I love having discourse with all of you but I'm not going to keep answering the same thing over and over again and justifying my work when it doesn't need to be justified. This is a small little bit of fiction in a vast sea.

If I sound pissed, it's because I am at this point. And I'm sure I'll get more asks in that are stating they are jumping ship or that they are disappointed in me or what not. I'll delete them and move on with my evening.

To all of you who are here for the ride and just want to experience what I'm writing? Thank you. Fiction is just meant to be a form of entertainment. I am not writing anything profound. To anyone that is looking for something more, move on. I'll see everyone who wants to get mad or saying I'm too harsh, in my inbox, I am sure. Thank god you can block anons.

[mx-julien]

ninjas' relationship with a home

Zane is used to moving on from places, as an amnesiac orphan he was used to getting up and carrying on, then his only temporary home, the Monastery, burns down (ref: s1 ep2 Home) and the others blame him for it. granted, he seems unaffected from these accusations and proceeds to find the Destiny's Bounty that day so all is forgiven

I wonder if some of this longing for a home was intensified after he regains his memories in Tik Tok (s1 ep7). because then he would be able to remember a time of prolonged safety and living with people you love

Kai and Nya lived at the blacksmith shop presumably since their parents got kidnapped by Krux and Acronix. Nya even had enough time to create a whole secret room of armor

the first years must've been especially hard given all the reminders of their parents being around. did they leave their bedroom untouched, save for the occasional cleaning?

did Kai have to pull up a stool to the stove to cook until he hit his growth spurt? are most of Nya's memories in that house of Kai making her lunches and tucking her in at night and sending her off to school?

who takes care of the shop while they're gone? and when they come back do they notice everything looks a little smaller- each corner thick with dust and the fingerprints of afternoons when they were 12 and only had each other?

Jay lived with Ed and Edna in the scrapyard since he was little and he can visit back there whenever he likes, but now he has another family to think about: the one he never had, the one that gave him away

however after Skybound he knows he has other parents as well. does he ever sit in the kitchen he grew up in and wonder if his biomom had any recipes she wanted to pass down? if she ever saw families or little kids and thought of him? if they have the same smile or same freckles or same laugh?

sure he can learn about Cliff all he wants and he loves his Mom and Dad dearly, but was there more? could he have learned to master lightning with his Mom? where was she when he was growing up? was she unable to see him or unwilling? is she even alive?

Cole's house is likely the same as when he was little, so he too can go visit, but I wonder if he went off to "boarding school" because after his Mom died he couldn't stand to be at home

what was a place to laugh and paint became gray when Lilly got ill. it turned into a place of hushed voices and packed bags for the hospital. after she died it was the home of yelling, of arguments, of tradition vs. passion. smiles became forced and doors only slammed shut.

with more time having passed, I wonder if Cole is glad that so many things of his are mostly untouched since his Mom died. he can find her neat handwriting on some notes in his desk, in books on the shelves, and point out decor she bought

Lloyd only had a complete home for a small part of his childhood before Misako left him at Darkley's. then, he must've lived somewhere close to the school. when he was doing Pythor's bidding, he seemed to be mostly homeless

after growing up deserted at a boarding school (that he clearly didn't like) and manipulated into long treks and homelessness to do the bidding of a snake, perhaps his misbehavior at the beginning of his stay on the Bounty was because he couldn't imagine it lasting. him? a place where he felt at home? better the devil you know than the devil you don't- just toss me back out on the streets I don't CARE!

when do you think he realized that the others weren't going to leave him like his Mom did or take advantage of him like Pythor? how many months in did it take him to realize that his uncle Wu wasn't the only one who wanted him there?

any particular ninja y'all want me to focus on drop in the tags or replies- I'm real interested about this now

[awoogayanderes]

[ 2:49 AM ] - OSAMU DAZAI

sypnosis : after a heartbreaking voicemail of yours, dazai finally comes home ( this is after pm!dazai btw )

warnings : mentions of suicide, non edited sorry!

other notes : another angst work, such a surprise, also this is really rushed because i need to get some content out

“please come home osamu,” was the first thing he heard when he listened to your voicemail. you had called him multiple times with no avail, so you relied on your final resort. he hadn’t been home for four days now and you tried to be patient and wait for him but once he stopped replying to any of your messages, you were worried. what if he got executed? what if he actually killed himself? so many awful thoughts settled in your mind, you wanted your boyfriend back. he was stunned.

it wasn’t his first time disappearing from home to clear his head from the spinning world. he liked his peace and quiet and sometimes that meant he needed to get away from you. he knew that you wouldn’t fight him on it, not wanting to cause any conflict that would push him away even more than he already does. but when he heard that voicemail, he knew that you were done with his habits. so why did you stay? is the question that revolved in dazai’s head as he slowly makes his way back home.

you knew he had a lot of mental baggage and so much emotional distress. he was one of the most if not the most feared man in yokohama, truth was no one loved him. that was until you came along, and when you stayed by his side when he told you that oda died, he knew you were his one and only. and yet he can’t bring himself to grow attached to you. he was planning both of your futures, so laying low was the only solution as of now. he heard your voicemail about a dozen times by this point. the distress and cries in your voice shook him.

“please just let me know if you’re alive, i’m begging you,” your voice rang in his ears. he didn’t mean to do this to you, he just didn’t know how to express that he cared for you, he just wanted some alone time. so he stood at your front door for what felt ages, contemplating what to say to you. to anyone else, he would look like a creep when in reality he was just your confused lover. logic reasoned out in his mind, you were probably asleep. he’d just talk to you in the morning like nothing and get a move on with both of your lives.

you were awake when he went into your shared home. your eyes widened as you sprinted off the couch and into his arms. he hesitantly returned the hug, rubbing his hand on your back. you pulled back examining him making sure to check if he had any bruises or injuries. he didn’t, his clothes were just raggedy and he had a worn out expression. there was silence, you wanted him to say something and he didn’t know what to say. tears formed at your eyes, glad at least he came home in one piece. “you shouldn’t cry over me,” is the first thing he says.

“i’m just happy that you’re okay, i thought something happened to you, i’m sorry i called you a lot but i was worried,” you rambled to him and he sighed pulling you closer to him. truth be told, he was terrified of your loyalty, you would wait centuries for him, you’d follow him through hell and back, you’d give up your life for him. he wasn’t deserving of any of this but he knew that there wasn’t any point in trying to change your mind, you’re here to stay. he took you to sit on your couch, kneeling before you as you stare at him confused. “i won’t do it again, please forgive me,” he puts his forehead on your knees as his hands tightly hold yours. truly a scene from a love fairytale.

the least he can do is ask for forgiveness for all the stress he’s put you through. he wants to be a better man to make you happy. so when you slide off the couch and go in for a hug, he knows you’ve forgiven him. he hugs you tightly, almost making it hard to breathe. his eyes glisten with tears as he finally realizes that he loves you more than he had planned. he would return your loyalty in ten fold, wanting you to feel loved by him. he’ll do anything he can to see that beautiful smile of yours. he won’t make you cry over him, he swears on it.

[the-badger-mole]

How Things Fall Apart

Zuko liked to believe that Mai had loved him once. At least, she had once loved a version of him. When he failed to live up to that image she'd built up in his head, all pretext of affection faded in short order.

It wasn't all Mai's fault, Zuko conceded. He had learned to ask her what exactly she wanted as gifts, but he still managed to disappoint. One year, he hadn't been able to afford to replace the diamond bracelet she'd lost during a vacation to Ember Island, so he'd gotten her what he thought was a lovely bracelet with a cheaper alternative stone (the Fire Nation was weathering an inflation crisis, and Zuko thought it would be gauche to spend so much money on the high quality gems imported from the Earth Kingdom instead of increasing the palace staff's salary). Another year, when the country was in a better place financially, Zuko splurged on a new set of throwing knives crafted by the finest blacksmiths under Master Piando's direction. Mai hadn't wanted more steel blades. She wanted the black blades crafted from the meteorite the Southern Tribe's prince had gifted Piando (Zuko's correction about Sokka not being a prince went unheard). It didn't matter that Piando had already made plans on how to use that stone, Zuko was the Fire Lord, and that should mean something. Zuko could do nothing right by Mai. She had still not forgiven him for getting rid of the stately palanquins.

After the birth of their first, and as it would turn out, only child, Mai became more distant. It was an improvement, Zuko told himself philosophically, over shouting matches and heavy objects being thrown at him (Mai never threw a blade at him, and she always made sure whatever she threw hit the wall and not Zuko. He was, after all, the Fire Lord). As long as Mai had access to the royal coffers, relative peace was kept. Zuko was certain that she had at least one lover, but he was content to ignore it, as long as Mai kept up a reasonable amount of discretion. Instability in the Fire Nation's royal family could have far reaching consequences, after all.

Iroh, ever the optimistic presence in Zuko's life, told his nephew about an art practiced in certain parts of the Fire Nation called kintsugi. Instead of throwing away broken things, the artists would carefully gather the broken parts and using a mixture of gold dust and lacquer, piece the broken things back together. The finished products often looked more beautiful than the original. Zuko thought he understood. Finally, fifteen years after he ascended the throne, eleven years after becoming a husband, and seven years after becoming a father, Zuko and the Fire Nation found a sense of equilibrium. The Fire Nation's economy had begun to right itself; a new curriculum designed to fight the decades of propaganda had been approved and implemented; feasible reparation agreements had been reached with the countries most damaged by the war and colonialism. Zuko and Mai only spoke when necessary for public appearances and state functions, and Izumi was growing into a precocious, inquisitive and imaginative child, to say nothing of her firebending prowess. If Zuko's daughter felt the absence of her mother, she hid it very well. Then one day, the peaceful existence Zuko had carved for himself and his child was shattered.

Mai's death was sudden and jarring. Zuko hadn't known anything was wrong until late that night, when a servant, disheveled and out of breath from sprinting to Zuko's chambers from hers, told him that a physician had been called for the Fire Lady, but the outlook was grim.

Officially, Mai had died after suffering from a hemorrhage caused by the miscarriage of her second child. While a few errant rumors floated around for a few months afterwards, the truth (that the child Mai was carrying wasn't Zuko's, and the miscarriage was intentional) was known to only a handful of Zuko's most trusted friends and family. Zuko grieved, though perhaps not as might be expected of a widower suddenly left alone to raise a child. He mourned what might have been if they hadn't married; mourned the family life he would never be able to give his daughter; mourned the lack of a partner who would stand at his side and help him move the country towards a more progressive, inclusive future. Most of all, he mourned the death of his hope of having anything better for himself.

Zuko didn't wallow, though. As little hope as he had left for his own prospects, he wanted Izumi to retain her own bright outlook for the future. He would have some help there with the expected arrival of Katara and her two children. It would be good, Zuko thought, for his daughter to have friends her age. As it would turn out, it was good for Zuko to have a friend around, too. When she stepped off the boat, clothed in a gauzy gold fabric gifted to her by the queen of Omashu, Zuko felt the weight in his heart lighten for the first time in years.

Follow up to Severing the Tie

Next, How Do You Mend?

[lilyhyperfixates]

Cold comfort - C.S

Pairing: Coriolanus Snow x Reader

Wordcount: 0.8K

Warnings: Coriolanus is a warning in itself, angst

Coryo was your best friend. Emphasis on was. Ever since Coriolanus had returned from district twelve he had been different. He had become colder, more distant towards you. The full extent of what had happened in district twelve you didn't know. All you knew is that your best friend has turned from a caring person to a man you did not recognize. 

Coryo and you had grown up together, living in the same building. When Coriolanus’ father died during the dark days you had been there for him. When your sister died in the same period he had been there for you. You knew of Snow family’s money troubles, how much pressure had been on Coryo to win the Plinth prize to get them back up on their feet.

Now that Coriolanus had returned from district twelve all those troubles seemed to disappear, with him now working under doctor Gaul and attending the university. Now that he did not have those troubles, he had cast you aside. You felt now that he had everything he had ever wanted; he did not need you anymore. 

Whenever you saw him in the hallways of the university he pretended as if you didn’t exist. As if the two of you had not been attached at the hip since the age of 7. In all these years you had known him, you admit, you had gotten very attached to him. 

You were sitting in your literary class when you felt a small tap on your shoulder. “I need to talk to you.” A deep voice spoke from behind you, a voice belonging to Coryo. A sigh falls from your lips and you turn around to face him. “Decided I do exist after all?”

Before Coriolanus could get a word in you started talking again. “Since you returned from district twelve you have not spoken a single word to me, but now you need to speak to me? Get lost Coriolanus.” Your words seeped into him like poison. You never called him Coriolanus, only Coryo.

“Just- Please. I really need to talk to you.” He pleaded, sounding almost desperate for you to go with him. You let out another sigh but do stand up from your seat and go with him. 

The halls of the university seemed smaller, almost suffocatingly so. Your throat closes up a bit in anticipation as Coriolanus leads you into an empty classroom. “I would like to apologize.” Coriolanus speaks plainly. You raise an eyebrow at his statement. “Okay..” You trail off, wanting him to continue talking.

“It wasn't fair of me to ignore you. I'm sorry.” A small smile appears on your face as he apologizes. In truth you had forgiven him from the moment he tapped on your shoulder.

Since Coryo had apologized you had been best friends yet again. Though in reality, which you hadn't realized, Coriolanus had an ulterior motive for wanting to make up with you. Coriolanus was soon to be a gamemaker, a highly sought after position. He would be even more of status than he was now, so he would need someone of status by his side.

Your family has a good reputation within the capitol, Coriolanus thought. Besides, if he had to be in a relationship, you would be his first choice. You’re sensible, tolerable, and most importantly, beautiful. Coriolanus had always appreciated your beauty, and thought you the only one worthy of him. 

Though he still needed to continue acting like he only wanted to be friends. You had accepted his apology no less than three weeks ago, so it was too soon to set his plan in motion. 

Coriolanus had been able to win your heart over in a mere four months. Four months of meticulously planned actions and conversations and his plan had worked. You had become his girlfriend. In those months he had officially become a gamemaker, securing his position even further. Several events had happened with you as his girlfriend, he had taken you along with him to them of course. 

He had not spent four months to win you over to not show you off. 

Only a year later you had gotten married. You had gotten married to the man you thought was the love of your life. If only you had been right. 

The wedding was beautiful. “Only the best for you, a wedding as beautiful as you are.” Coriolanus had said while you were planning it. Though shortly after the wedding Coriolanus had turned cold again, in the same way he had turned cold when he returned from district twelve.

Coriolanus was your husband. Emphasis on was. Now he was just a man that you despised, that happened to carry that title.

[milayawr]

Stolen Pieces

Nikolai Lantsov x F!Reader

Summary: The reader has to steal for her debts, and the victim of her last theft isn't happy about it.

Warnings: Mentions of Pekka Rollins and death.

Word Count: 1,340

Notes: I'm not sure about it but here we go.

+ I decided to use "you" instead of "she/her" and it's a big change for me but i'll do it anyways.

✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧

It was a tough decision but you made it years ago when your mother died. You didn't have time to think back then, you just had to. Every weekend, you went to pray for your sins to be forgiven. Stealing was a sin and you had become a sinner. You were living with the need of being forgiven. No one would forgive you if they knew you were the one who stole their important belongings.

But you needed the money as much as you needed forgiveness. Your mother died with debts and after her death, they were all over you. You inherited the debts. Pekka Rollins would kill her if you won't pay all of them.

It was nearly done, your freedom was so close. You could feel it on your fingertips. But it was also hard to do. You had to steal ten thousand kruge in five days. Five days till your freedom or death.

You've made a deal four years ago. You will pay your mother's debts and be free. If you can't pay off all of them before your twentieth birthday, Pekka will kill you.

Pekka had many enemies, and none of them could finish him. He was dangerous as hell.

You closed your eyes and leaned your head against the wall. Your breath got stuck in your lungs because of how fast you ran. You continued to run until you were certain that you had distanced yourself from the port. Maybe it was a big mistake to steal the most known pirate's money, but it was more than enough to close the debts of your dead mother.

Your mother had you when she was really young. You knew that you were a whole mistake, but your mother had shown you love. She got into debt to feed you, give you a safe house, and help you, her daughter, grow up less pathetic than you were meant to be. You had to close the debts.

The streets were empty and dark. You trusted the darkness more than anyone else because it was easy to steal when it was dead of the night. You hated every second of it and would hate every moment of your future life— if only there would be such a thing.

You checked the bag that was hiding the money. All of them were there. More than ten thousand kruge. You couldn't hide her happiness. You pressed the bag to your chest as you tried to push back your tears. You didn't cry but wanted to cry like a newborn babe cries for the love of a mother. When it's all done, you will spend your whole life praying and seeking the forgiveness of the saints. For four years, you had nothing to do but steal. After all of it, you will be free to seek forgiveness.

The darkness that surrounded her became heavier as you started to walk. You felt her heartbeat get slower, and it scared you. Your eyes were heavier than the darkness, and then you fell into someone's arms. The strong arms of a man started to carry you. Step after step, your sight became darker, and finally, your mind went away for a dreamless sleep.

———

Sounds of wood filled your ears. As your consciousness came back, you kept your eyes closed. You wanted to figure out who had kidnapped you. Someone was walking around. The sound of wood was strange yet familiar to you. You couldn't understand how many people were there. Only the footsteps of someone were loud and clear.

"She's awake." Said a female voice. You started to open your eyes and waited for a headache, but there was nothing but blankness. You couldn't remember how you got here.

"Well, well," this time, the voice belonged to a male. You saw him standing, so you thought it was his footsteps that were torturing the wooden floor of the ship.

The ship.

The realization hit you hard in the face. You were on the ship of the famous Sturmhond. They've managed to catch you and will probably kill you. It was really a mistake to steal from him. Now he will throw you away to the sea and watch the creatures of the sea eat and torture you and laugh while you die.

Pekka sounded very nice after all.

"I am sorry," you stated as you panicked. You couldn't even choose the words that left your mouth.

"So she knows her mistake," Sturmhond said. "Very well." His foot carried him closer to you. Every step of his took a second from your life. "Tolya, Tamar, you can leave us. I have to deal with this beautiful thief that came out of the blue."

They left without any words. Your stomach was against you and started to turn up and down. You were going to throw up because of how you were scared at the moment. "You took your money back, I assume."

"You assume the right thing."

"So I can go now. You know, you took it back and now it is my turn to go."

"No, I don't know, actually." He stepped closer and closer to you. Your eyes sought a sword or anything that could kill you in a second, but there was nothing. Just him and you and the bed you were sitting on. "I want to understand something first. Why would a girl like you steal my money?"

"Maybe because I need it?" You regretted those words, but it was too late. Words hung on the air while regret put an ashy taste to your mouth.

Your soul nearly left your body when you heard a laugh from him. "Yeah, I get that, obviously. But why do you need it?"

You didn't want to tell him about your mother's debts. It was too embarrassing for you. You weren't ashamed of your mother; on the contrary, you were ashamed of yourself. You could have a proper job and have money. But the jobs that were offered to you were not appropriate at all.

"I—" You hesitated, but he waited for you to respond patiently. "I have debts." You cut it short and avoided telling the details to a famous stranger.

Sturmhond just studied you. His eyes observed your face and your expressions closely. "You are stealing for your debts," He said. "Why aren't you finding an easier way?"

Your fear of death changed itself to another thing. Your eyes were filled with anxiety and you were trembling. You pulled yourself back as possible.

"No, you got me wrong," He declared when he saw the sudden change in you. "I meant to offer you a job here, and in exchange, I would pay off all of your outstanding debts. It's not a job in the way that you're thinking."

"Why?" You asked because you knew no good was for free. Why would he want a thief to work with him?

"Because I'm impressed, that's it." He threw the money bag into the air and caught it again. "I want you to work for me and I'll pay your debts. Deal?"

You ignored him to think for a while. It was a great opportunity, but you didn't know if he was serious. What if he was tricking you into some trap? What if he was just trying to give you hope and then kill you with those empty words? You weren't sure about it, but your life was close to the end anyways. There was no way to find ten thousand kruge in five days again. You had the chance, but the chance had turned its face against you.

You had fallen into gambling between Pekka and Sturmhond, and you had to choose one. Pekka would kill you anyways because you lost the money you had. Sturmhond would probably kill you because the money you stole was his. It could be a trap but... You had to choose one of the paths.

So, you decided to play with your unfortunate fate. "Deal."

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Part Two

[sheasshovel]

HEAR ME OUT

Scar as Apollo and Gem as Artemis…

Starting with Gem;

-HER ANTLERS!! Deer are sacred animals to Artemis and she is also the goddess of the moon and thats so shiny duo crumbs (pearl as the moon).

-Pearl could also work as a follower of Artemis though because of her disastrous double life relationship with Scott. Followers of Artemis swore off love and lived a life of chaste, which aligns well with Pearl having forgiven Scott after she won but never having the same relationship with him that she had in Last Life.

-Artemis herself also swore off love of any kind.. and guess who wasn’t there for Double life for a soul bound?

-Her only Allies in sl, besides the moon herself, were Scott and Impulse. Both of which could work as devout followers of Artemis because of their rejection of their own respective soulmates. Scott acknowledges his past lovers as his exes and never (to my knowledge) expresses wanting to get back with them. Impulse, too, never hesitated to attack the mounders even if they had Bdubs on their side. Impulse and Bdubs had a great relationship in Double Life but I like to think that, for this theory to work, they’ve just decided to keep that relationship in Dl.

-Besides the moon, Artemis is also a symbol of the hunt which is exactly what she did in sl sessions 7-8; hunt people down with the aid of the moon. Imagine moonlight illuminating her path as she stalks her prey….

Scars turn;

-Now, Apollo isn’t the god of the Sun (that would be Helios… or Grian in this case) but rather of sunlight, but the sun is still a huge symbol of him. Not to go all desert duo on you but the crumbs are there. Scar also covers himself in sunflowers in sl, a flower known to always be facing the sun, basking in its light. It’s worth mentioning that Scar was only close to winning when he and the Sun were inseparable in 3rd life, and he actually won when he was faced with the symbol of the moon and the moon herself.

-This is more silly but Apollo is highly connected with musical arts (specifically the lyre) and could you imagine if that scene where Grian and Scar were singing together wasn’t just Scar being oblivious but instead Apollo using any chance he can get to showcase his musical talent to the Sun?

-Apollo’s gift of Prophecy… Scar “we all die in the end” would be more prophetic if we all collectively gaslight ourselves into believing that he died after hitting succeed on his task. But in these death games, everyone knows by now how it ends. I think Scar acknowledging this is somehow foreshadowing how he wins though; by murdering everyone who stands in his way, not accepting sacrifices and turning on his temporary allies the second its clear that it would benefit him. When he said everyone would die he truly meant EVERYONE would die, and a majority will die to him or his twin (Artemis).

-Apollo and Artemis are both known for using Archery, but Scar is literally Hotguy come on now. His last kill was an arrow to Pearl that knocked her off of a cliff, an ARROW at the MOON. Scar is an incredibly skilled bow user and I would include this in Gem’s part too but I’m pretty sure she’s gotten more kills on sl by sword.

-Lastly, the Muses. Apollo, being the god of arts and music, was the choir leader of the 9 muses on Olympus. Now, Scar was never friends with more than 2 people at a time in the life series but lets look at his kills instead. In session 9 alone, he got 6 Permakills and 2 assists (Big B and Skizz) which brings us up to 8. Not enough but he lasted for 9 sessions, which is pretty cool if you interpret every session as a muse. Each session’s task being a huge influence on how Scar acts, even if he fails the task.

I think the 9 muses, Gem’s preferred weapon, and Apollo’s connection to medicine and Scar’s lack thereof are the weakest parts of this delusional rant but I still love the idea of the final battle in sl featuring the moon rejecting Artemis and a battle between the Twins. Apollo winning only after destroying the moon herself, who lost her will to win after the events of Dl. Apollo having once been allied with the Sun, and the Moon once having her win handed to her by her soulmate. Anyways Shinyduo Desertduo and Scar/Pearl narrative foils real and true.

[seraphtrevs]

I'm going to go roll the rock away from Nacho's tomb in a minute to see if he's better yet, but before I do, I feel like talking about why we got Nacho Christ in the first place.

Both BrBa and BCS are heavily thematic. They have a point beyond things just happening. BrBa is about toxic masculinity and its life-destroying effects. Walt insists over and over that he turned to crime for the sake of his family, but in the final episode, he confesses to Skyler that he did it for himself. He “protected” and “provided” for his family not for their sake, but in order to feel powerful. That quest for power destroys Walt, his family, Jesse, and a shit-ton of other people, from the addicts he supplied with dangerous drugs to the people he killed (both on purpose and by accident).  Toxic masculinity, says Vince Gilligan, is bad.

So what is BCS trying to say? I don’t think the premise is as explicit as BrBa, partly because I’m pretty sure they didn’t start the series with this intention. But as they found their identity, it slowly started to take shape. BCS is about the folly of vengeance.

BCS 6x09 is in many ways the real finale of BCS—the end of Jimmy’s pre-Saul life. And just like BrBa made its premise explicit in its finale, BCS has the characters reference its theme directly, too. When Mike promises Manuel justice for Nacho, Manuel looks at him in disgust and tells him, “What you talk about is not justice. What you talk of is revenge.” The next scene finds Gus trying to make a human connection before realizing that his quest for revenge endangers anyone close to him, and he will lose them just like he lost Max. His life will always be empty of love and companionship. And Jimmy and Kim have lost each other, their lives and marriage torn apart, all because they wanted to get back at Howard. Revenge, says Peter Gould, is bad.

(courtesy cut for the tl;dr)

There were a lot of things that sent Jimmy down the slippery slope into becoming Saul, but two acts in particular turbo-charged his downfall. Even after Jimmy defeats Chuck’s attempt to kick him out of the law, he’s still angry. Humiliating Chuck at the hearing was a means to an end, but manipulating the insurance agent to hike HHM’s rates was pure vengeance, done solely to hurt Chuck. That action indirectly leads not only to Chuck’s suicide, but also to their final conversation when Chuck advises him to let go of his guilt and accept that he’s a bad person deep down inside and will never be anything else.

Jimmy’s big second act of vengeance is against Howard, which ends with him losing the love of his life. And once Kim leaves, Jimmy embraces the worst parts of himself, which leads to him enabling Walt’s reign of terror. Revenge has poisoned his life.

Mike’s story also illustrates the anti-vengeance theme. Before the show even begins, Mike had taken his revenge by murdering his sons’ killers. It made him feel better temporarily, but ultimately it did not give him peace. Instead, he chases more vengeance, against Hector this time, which ultimately leads to his downfall.

Even Chuck’s story ties in with revenge. Chuck wanted to punish Jimmy—for stealing from their parents, but also for being more loved than him (in his warped perception). This obsession with taking down Jimmy leads to his disgrace and death.

So what does this have to do with Nacho Christ? A lot, because Christ symbolism is often used around themes of forgiveness—the opposite of revenge. But BCS has a more nuanced point of view than turn the other cheek. BCS’s Christ figure dies cursing the people who wronged him. Clearly the point isn’t that Nacho should have forgiven Gus, or Gus should have forgiven Hector, or Mike should have forgiven his son’s murderers.

Instead, BCS says the alternative to revenge is to forgive yourself. But forgiving yourself is not an easy action, because to truly be at peace, you have to make amends where you can. Nacho’s crimes put his father’s life in danger. He made amends by sacrificing his life to save his father. Jimmy makes amends by publicly admitting to his lies and telling the truth at last, which leads to the loss of his freedom.

An important point is that neither Jimmy nor Nacho made their sacrifices just to punish themselves. Self-punishment does not lead to forgiveness, although the price of truly being able to forgive yourself is sometimes steep.

Nacho was backed into a corner. He could have instead gone down the path of revenge by letting Gus kill his dad and then swearing vengeance on Gus. But that would have been pointless and not given him any relief from his guilt. Instead, he chose to sacrifice his life in order to get his dad out of the danger his action put him in. Nacho’s death wasn’t a punishment—it was just the natural outcome of the action he had to take to make amends.

Likewise, Jimmy going to prison wasn’t the point. In order to be an honest person, Jimmy had to start telling the truth, not just to himself but to the rest of the world. A consequence of telling that truth was prison time.

The show goes out of its way to demonstrate that point with Kim’s story. Her Floridian exile is a punishment she concocted for herself, thinking that suffering would make her feel less guilty. But it doesn’t. Inflicting pain on herself does nothing to make up for what she did to Howard.

In order to forgive herself, Kim must make amends. What does finally help is confessing to Cheryl in order to help restore Howard’s reputation. The consequence of her confession is that she’s put herself in legal jeopardy, but that isn’t the point. The point is she's doing what she can to make up for her actions, which allows her space to forgive herself.

At the same time, self-forgiveness doesn’t always involve a high cost. Mike’s path to self-forgiveness was to be a supportive presence in Kaylee and Stacey's lives—to take on the role Matty would have played if he had lived. He didn't need to buy them a house with dirty money. He just needed to be there. But ultimately, facing his demons and taking on the hard work of processing his grief was too painful for Mike. Instead, he took refuge in revenge and became even more lost.

So that's why we needed Nacho Christ. He is the negation of the cycle of vengeance.

[lea-noah]

never forgive me

"Master, please never forgive me. Master, Hate me. Kill me. [anything] please..."

obikin edit from Across the Stars series made by l e a n o a h | # 1 | # 2 | # 3 | # 4 | # 5 | # 6 | # 7 one of my favourite (heartbreaking again 😭) obikin fanart ❤️❤️❤️ by @mandhos pin | deviantart c | 09. 01. 2024

The lockscreen Version. 👇 Free to use and share (please credit or link) Thanks.

fanart : @mandhos overlays : Carllton textures : erinaeErae psd : ciaracoloring

[ inspired/based on ]

Guilt. There’s no other feeling more human than guilt. Nothing can expose the human flaws, its own confines better than guilt. For only then, you’re made aware of your human condition. The utter misery and absurdity of it. [...] No, you must have everything, given everything you ever could wish for, power, fame, luck, love, have the world on your knees or thinking yourself above it all, above death itself, above everyone, for only you have the right to have it all and do whatever you want with it. You are free, you are able and justly entitled to decide what should or shouldn’t happen, what is your own, who is yours and belongs to you. For you are none other than Anakin Skywalker. The one and only Chosen One this galaxy had ever known, the legendary Jedi, the “Hero with No Fear” every being in this galaxy has heard about, fearless since the famous hero forgot he’s just a human. He didn’t forget. He acted like he did, because it was easier. It was easier to live in the illusion of him being invincible, ‘cause otherwise… he would remember what he really is, like when his mother died. A human. No, less still. A small pathetic weak human and he knew it then. Fear. Even with him still having his cherished “all”, he threw himself to gain even more. To get more admiration, more recognition, more honor, praise, love… but most of all, power. Only more power, the supreme power could face his fears. Could crush it. Erase it forever. Wipe out this annoying defect blemishing his existence. He’s no ordinary human. He’s above it. For he has it all and can have even more. Yes, he can. He will… it’s what he thought.

He never actually asked himself why was he offered so much?! Why was he given everything that made him feel important, feel wanted, feel…happy. Oh, the answer is never simpler. Because it will make a karking good show of watching him lose it all. It will be so much satisfying to see everything he had, crumble before his very eyes, no, better yet, blasting it all with his own hands, will it not? Falling to degraded mindless scug, no, even lower, for he became nothing more than a slave…willingly. To Palpatine, to power, to fear. He threw away anything left human in himself because he was afraid to live as one. Anakin Skywalker would have been dead to the world and to himself foremost, since to think himself alive, to call himself with that name again, would mean to accept everything he did. Everything he destroyed. Everyone he killed. At last, accept he is only a human or even less, for he can change nothing. He’s helpless. He can’t erase his deeds or revive the ones he killed. He can’t ask forgiveness from the loved ones he betrayed, as he never will be forgiven. He has no right to be forgiven. He may die for the world, for the whole galaxy, save it, save every living soul on it. He may burn alive for them, let his screams of pain entertain them, let his blood wash the dirt on their soles, let his tears choke a whole flaming river, let his knees grow in stone and it still wouldn’t be enough. It will never be. And this he knows now, it’s what is called guilt. His guilt. To want to do all of that only to lessen it. A fraction. A scrap. A breath lighter to take in, a tad less feeling like rotten sand are filling his lungs. Like the air carries screams of whom he slayed. He’s dying. That’s what humans do. Worse yet, as he’s doing it himself, slowly, oh, so very slow, with every taken breath, with every strangling beat his heart dares to pound. His body knew of pain that nearly wiped out his mind with its intensity, however even that paled beside what his guilt feels for him now. And it gets worse. Since he is given it. A second chance. Warmth. Love. Trust. Happiness if he chooses to forget everything. He’s given so much, more than he ever had… and with every small smile, warm hand or caring gaze he’s gifted with, everything that Obi-Wan gives him, with it Anakin Skywalker dies. His guilt is killing him, and the slashes are getting heavier, sharper, unbearable more. For he understands he doesn’t deserve any of it. He can’t have it. He shall not. He was not forgiven. He will never be.

| Chapter 24 "Guilt and Peace" from "Chosen: from the Ashes" by lea noah

[hearts4juzi]

can you pass the golden duo headcanons i think you would have good ones

🤲🤲🤲my hands are open ready to catch them

RUBS MY FUCKING HANDS TOGETHER IVE BEEN THINKING ABT THEM SM UVE COME AT THE RIGHT TIME

echolalia. i already said that but. ECHOLALIA. shit gets tossed around. funny words youd find in a dr seuss book.

holding hands, leaning on each other, and lots of hugs!!!! best friends 2 me :(

cassidy wasnt super nice to him when they were alive and she regrets it a lot because of how things turned out and shes super defensive of him now

that being said, she never bullied him and was actively rude to anyone who did. she didnt particularly like him but she wasnt gonna stand for the harassment. if shed known about his party, she couldve saved him and i think she thinks about that a lot

i think eventually she apologized formally and he assured her it was fine and that he forgave her. because she of all people deserved it

he listens to her vent her frustrations. sometimes she reminds him of michael with how angry she is, but he knows how to calm her down and he always remembers shes nothing like michael was

he keeps her company in ucn when being around everyone is too much. hes forgiven them but sometimes things are hard still. sometimes he cant be around them. and she really needs company too. he knows she wont come to him, so he goes to her.

he doesnt like the gore or blood so cassidy will talk to him when theyre stuffing nightguards

hes still scared of animatronics so none of the kids greet him as animatronics. they care about him sosoososo much

evan would do fucking anything for cassidy. anything.

she knows his anxiety triggers pretty well by this point and she knows how to distract him. and vice versa.

casisdy doesnt panic as much as she gets over emotional and freaks out. does that make sense? she has more anger than fear and it fucks her up and hes always there when she gets tired of it.

he does her hair because he died before he could ever do his own. he wishes hed grown out his hair before he died

she encourages any behaviors he hid because of michael. she encourages anything that goes against michael.

shes a terribly influence on evan but its because she lvoes him and thinks he deserved better. he thinks she has enough anger for the both of them. she knows hes right and she hates it because HE deserves this anger.

they fight a lot but its never like cassidy and charlie. if cassidy fought with evan like she fought with charlie itd ruin both of them.

if theyd lived they probably wouldve run away together and been roomates

they like to joke that theyre soulmates (platonically) in both a figurative and literal sense. get it? because their souls are connected in golden freddy? they are my world

when they first meet in GF its tense. they end up caring about each other but theres lots to figure out and understand. she cant yell too loud at him because it reminds him of his dad, she cant play certain pranks on him like she might with her friends because it reminds him of michael.

she learns when to be loud and open with him and when she has to be gentle. he gets used to her shenanigans but sometimes things are too much

shes jokingly mean to her friends but not as much to evan because he doesnt always get its a joke

shed have loved to do his makeup and his nails. if theyd lived and moved out together the first thing they wouldve done is dye their hair and paint their nails and do their makeup and buy clothes they KNOW their parents would hate.

thats all i have in my brain rn they make me sad