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#Kakuzu headcanons
or0ch1maru · 6 months
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••••••AFTER-CARE?•••••••
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18+, mentions of rough sex, hook up/one night stand, sub drop, female reader. Fluff & cuddles, sweet ending ^.^
You’d heard stories from your girlfriends and some women from work about after care. The time to mentally settle down and do other soft things after sex, particularly rough sex. You have experience, being in a few different relationships and some one night stands but you never experienced the joy of after care
So when the time came that you and your hook up finished, you were already slipping your clothes back on. Getting ready to head back home now that things are done. Despite this heavy feeling weighing over your head.
“Where you going princess?” He asked, your ears perked as you looked at him over your shoulder. “Home, we’re done here aren’t we?” You replied softly, your tone even despite the nagging feeling behind it
“Nah, come lay down with me.” He said, his eyes scanning over your face, wondering if you had something important to attend too. When he noticed your hesitation, he stretched out an arm, his muscles protruding as he wraps his hand around your waist, pulling you against his side.
Once he got you comfortable, your face nuzzled against neck, something overcame you and you couldn’t hold back. Tears started falling from your eyes, your hand gripping a small fistful of his shirt.
“Did I hurt you?” He asks, his usual husky tone laced with concern as he took in how vulnerable you are. You shook your head in reply, trying to slow your breathing down enough to answer him.
“Ah, I see” he spoke gently, a large calloused hand pushing strands of hair out of your face. “You’ve never experienced this have you?” His voice is almost like a purr as he watches you reply with a no. He shifts his body once again, him laying flat on his back with you on top of him. Your face resting against his broad chest, his thick arms wrapping around your small frame. Holding you tightly against him
“Don’t worry doll, I’ve got you.” He murmurs. You feel his lips graze the top of your head as he presses a kiss against your hair.
“You’ll never feel that way again. Not ‘s long as I’ve got you”
TOJI, soft SUKUNA, NANAMI, Zetsu, Kisame, HIDAN, KAKUZU, OBITO, SATORU, SUGURU, Pain, orochimaru, Kenpachi, Renji
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cosmic-glow · 5 months
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Request: "May I request soft akatsuki headcannons for a reader who loves to bake and cook? It's a passion of mine, and a great stress reliever! There's nothing I won't try and try to make!"
Notes: First of all, I'm sorry it took me so long to respond 😭 I also like cooking and I completely agree with you! I hope you like what I wrote, good reading!
"Are you hungry, love?"- Akatsuki
Warnings: no pronouns; no use of "y/n"; pure cuteness. Gender: Soft Headcanons. Characters: Itachi; Kisame; Deidara; Sasori; Kakuzu; Hidan; Zetsu; Tobi/Obito; Pein; Konan.
Itachi Uchiha
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He always offers you help in the kitchen.
He is very picky when cooking for someone but is easily satisfied with whatever you cook for him.
He feels obligated to return the favor by cooking for you too. That's why he took charge of breakfast, always waking up before you to prepare what you like.
Likes hot foods and pasta. Loves handmade sweets.
He prefers traditional foods, but accepts trying new flavors when he's with you.
He loves going out to buy new ingredients with you, he knows a lot about the subject and would be of great help.
Kisame Hoshigaki
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You know that popular saying that the best way to conquer a man is through his stomach? It applies very well to this man.
He likes to be spoiled with food and will be grateful for it so.. please cook for him.
His heart feels warm when he comes home and smells something delicious you are preparing.
He likes foods with a sweet and sour taste, and he loves meat. He also loves sweets, so it's not hard to please Kisame.
He loves trying new flavors with you. If you want, he'll even help you in the kitchen, but he's not very good (he's a bit clumsy).
He'll find a way to say thank you, whether it's washing the dishes, giving gifts, taking you out to eat, all of the above, whatever you prefer.
He's the kind of guy who would eat what you prepared even if it was completely burnt if he knew you put effort into it.
Deidara
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He likes fast food, but is very happy when you cook for him.
Thanks to you, he's starting to eat more healthily, because he has a childish palate and is very resistant to exploring new flavors.
He likes spicy foods because are like an explosion in the mouth.
"I have to say, honey, your cooking is an art!" - he says with his mouth full when he really likes it.
One of his favorite moments of the day is when you're eating something you've prepared or he's bought, watching a movie and talking about anything.
It's something very simple, but if you make a cake just for him on his birthday, he'll feel so loved that he might even cry a little.
(Sometimes he brags to the other members about having such a skilled s/o in the kitchen).
But please keep this boy the hell away from the kitchen! When I say he's a complete chaos cooking, it's because the kitchen almost always explodes! Literally!
Sasori
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He often forgets that he still needs to eat due to his puppet body, so he's grateful that you remind him. He still needs to eat a little every now and then to ensure a bit of vital energy or something.
And yes, that was the lie he invented to not disappoint you. And regardless of whether you believed it or not, he always eats your food, even though he knows how much work it will take to clean his insides afterwards (don't worry, he'll probably come up with something to solve this).
Understand, he lied because he knows how important cooking is to you, he sees how much you work at it, but had the misfortune of being with a guy who doesn't need to eat… but he couldn't risk hurting you for something that's his fault.
Sasori only eats your food and no one else's, no matter how much they insist.
He likes foods with strong spices, he no longer feels flavors in the same way as when he was a human.
At the end of every meal, he politely thanks you for the delicious food and offers to help with the dishes.
Kakuzu
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He likes hot, very hot, and traditional foods. Doesn't like sweets.
He's great in the kitchen and sometimes cooks for you too, as a thank you. Kakuzu has many years of experience in the kitchen, take the opportunity to ask questions and get some tips, he may not show it but he really likes to help you.
Maybe you don't know, but Kakuzu practically never eats out, he knows that some people want him dead and could easily poison his food. So for him to eat everything you prepare without hesitation is really a great show of trust.
He is very silent while eating, but he doesn't mind if you want to talk about your day, he will be listening to every part.
He really appreciates your food, getting involved and asking about the spices you used, how you prepared it, he really likes it when you test a new recipe.
Always at the end of every meal he thanks you for the food and gets up before you to clear the table and wash the dishes, a silent way of thanking you.
Hidan
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Spicy and crunchy foods and sour desserts, it's true heaven for him...
As incredible as it may seem, Hidan is very picky about his food, it's unbearable to go out to eat with him, it seems like he always makes a point of finding some flaw.
But it's the total opposite with you, he eats everything you prepare without complaining too much, just teasing you a little as always. Except if he is angry with you for some reason, then he will be impossible, no matter what you prepared, he will not eat it.
Hidan has a very annoying childhood palate, so don't force him to eat something he doesn't really like, like vegetables for example.
You'll probably have some arguments about him drink any kind of blood but not wanting to eat the soup you made (for example), but it won't change anything.
Whenever you enter the kitchen, Hidan follows right behind to find out what you're going to prepare and also because he loves to annoy you while you're cooking. He tickles you, bites you, hugs you, kisses you and even steals some utensils to disturb you before you kick him out of the kitchen.
Zetsu
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He likes meat a lot, in fact you thought it was the only thing he could eat.
He is very impatient and even hugs you trying to convince you to let him eat before you finish.
"I don't care that it's not ready yet and it's raw, I'm hungry, love. Let me eat it just the way it is."
Not a very good critic of your recipes, he will eat literally anything you put in front of him and thank you for it.
You are the one who teaches him to have a more refined palate and he loves trying new flavors with you.
Zetsu grows a vegetable garden just for you, with everything you need fresh and tasty for your recipes.
Tobi/Obito Uchiha
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Tobi >loves< sweets, make sweets for him and you'll have him curled up in the palm of your hand.
Both Tobi and Obito don't like spicy food.
He feels so loved when you cook for him <3 (a tip: prepare ramen for him when he's sad, it'll make him feel better).
Whenever he comes home early he brings you some sweets he bought at the bakery as a treat.
This is another man who is very easy to win over with his stomach. He'll feel very special if you tell him you've prepared something just for him. Make him your guinea pig for new recipes, he really doesn't mind and always gives you great feedback.
He always offers you the first bite out of respect, he is as happy to see you eating and talking about how tasty it is as he is to eat something you prepared.
Pein
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Pein went through long periods of starvation as a child, so as much as it may seem, he isn't very picky about what he eats.
Likes hot and spicy foods. Hate sweets.
He is a great fan of your food, even if you've accidentally burnt it or overdone the seasoning, he'll be happy to eat something you've lovingly prepared.
Due to his work as leader of Akatsuki, he often forgets to eat properly. It's you who show up at his office and remind him to eat, with something you've prepared in hand, he's really grateful for your care.
He is always attentive to your needs. Did you like a cuter utensil kit than the ones you have? Are your. Wanting new seasonings? Suddenly they appear in your pantry. Everything you need.
Pein always makes it clear how he likes you to cook but that he doesn't want you to be overwhelmed with it, so he does everything to make this task easier for you, including ordering something from restaurants for you to eat and enjoy your free time together.
Konan
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He likes mild sweets and, ironically, spicy foods. (Please make sweets for Konan, she likes a lot).
She will always feel like she is bothering or burdening you when you cook for her.
Konan isn't that good in the kitchen, so she's grateful to have a s/o who cooks so well. Sometimes she watches you cook to try to learn something, in an attempt to return the favor one day.
Buy a lot of sweets for you and make a point of always keeping your pantry well stocked so you don't have to worry about buying ingredients.
As I said, Konan doesn't like to burden you, so very often she takes you on restaurant dates.
Konan loves the culinary tours you plan, she could listen to you talk for hours about techniques, recipes and ideas. She loves seeing how excited you get talking about it.
Sorry for any typos;
Buy me a coffee?
Masterlist
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iambilliejeanok · 2 years
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can you please write headcanons on how the Akatsuki eat out their fem s/o? Thank you.
Yes I can, you’re welcome🌸
🌸How the Akastuki members eat out fem reader🌸
Feature: Pein||Kakuzu||Hidan||Sasori||Itachi||Kisame
Warnings: 🔞, NSFW, content might be unsuitable for some viewers, contains taboo/explicit scenes that some might find disturbing, darcyphillia, female cunnilingus, UNEDITED, the whole thing is about pussy eating, all consensual scenarios.
No artwork presented here belongs to me
💗Enjoy💗
Pein
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We love Pein we really do, but dear lawd, he knows how to torture you. Pein is such a dirty tease. He’s so bad, you might even end up crying, the remainder of the session.
With his mouth literally watering, this is tough on him too, spit casually sliding off of his tongue and onto your vulva, while he’s softly biting and sucking the skin surrounding your genitalia, leaving small hickies behind and NEVER touching your clit.
If you’re strong willed enough, screaming at him and tugging on his dry orange hair might direct his attention to your suffering, but that also really annoys him, and now a lingering kiss is all he leaves you with, your hips would’ve shot up if he wasn’t holding them down, but your poor clit is way too sensitive that just the contact of his soft lips against your clit nearly took you out.
“Pein! Baby I can’t stand this! Please!!!”, you desperately beg him, unashamedly attempting to shove your clit in his mouth but you can’t even get close, he’s freakishly strong. He’s eyebrows now lower and he’s purely disappointed. “If I give you want you want you’re still going to bother me. Why can’t you give in to me?”, he asks, and lawd knows you couldn’t give a flying fuck right now, he needs to get serious.
But this is his little game, to see how much he can torture you, purple eyes refocusing on your pussy. Here’s a good reason as to why he admires edging you so much, you’re so incredibly wet, and when he separates your folds to get a good look at you, it’s all goey and sticky, and he absentmindedly starts licking a trail up and down every inch of your exposed vulva, every lick setting your entire body ablaze, Pein shoving his tongue as deep as it can go inside of you as he continues licking up, but he stops just below your clit his eyes blissfully shut and his head in another world as he takes his sweet time to taste every inch of you.
There’s no level of horny greater than this for you and Pein is hard enough to break something with his erection. He’s definitely not sorry for putting you through this and for a matter of fact, he had you right where he needs you. He’s managed to reduce you to a desperate mess, your pussy is dripping with your arousal and he’s looking right back at your hole, watching it contract and expand as though it’s begging him too. He knows it’s begging him. Now he can mess with you.
Kakuzu
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First of all, Kakuzu towers over you, his impressive frame and bulky size means he can easily manhandle you regardless of your size, and we know this grumpy piece of sexyness takes advantage of that too.
He’s so serious though, but he loves your personality, whatever it is. He doesn’t typically make any sounds outside of heavy breathing when the two of you have sex, and you’re always the one reaching the high notes.
Kakuzus approach to eating you out is definitely different from Peins, because Kakuzu doesn’t have the time of day to edge you. He’s a dangerous assassin and only enjoys making money the easiest way he knows how, so he always needs to stay alert and be on guard, even in the comfort of your own bedroom while his head is buried between you legs.
He’s very intentional and to the point, he wants you to start crying out his name with ragged screams RIGHT NOW😭This man has no general idea of how to initiate anything sexual so he just scoops you up, throwing you over his shoulder wherever you are. He places you down anywhere comfortable enough for you lay down, and he’s immediately pushing your thighs up and spreading your legs. He also ALWAYS just moves your panties to the side because he doesn’t have time to get all romantic with you, but he also really wants to make you feel good🥺 he really tries his best to make you feel good, if only it didn’t have to be so spontaneous and intense all the time
The pad of his thumb is already rubbing your clit in circles. Now you know he’s insanely good at this, so the minute he throws you over his shoulder, your pussy is already growing moist with every passing second. He’s not a fan of dirty talk but sometimes he’ll comment on how you’re already creamed up at this point. If only he understood his own power😭😭
With his focus on your beautiful face, he spits right onto your clit and you can’t help but moan at the sensation of the cold spit landing on clit, but he’s massaging your clit again with his thumb, his free hand working in ripping your top in half so he can free your titties. Kakuzu gets so horny when you let him play with you, because it’s not like he can just do this whenever he wants. Biting your lip to stifle a moan at the contact of his open palm kneading your boob would work if the speed of his thumb in your clit didn’t increase, and you’re moaning loudly now, his focused facial expression relaxing with a smirk pulling at his lips before he buries his head between your thighs, tongue fucking you to an orgasm, and you’re already throwing your head back, overwhelmed with Kazuzu’s intensity and aggressiveness as he licks and sucks on your clit, your screams like a beautiful play that he gets to orchestrate, knowing what to do to get what kind of reaction.
Your orgasm are always so long and intense because he’s constantly stimulating something. If he’s sucking your soul out of your clit he’s also tongue fucking you, his fingers helping out to stimulate your gspot while he’s free hand keeps you spread just enough to lick every inch of you. HE LOVES EATING YOUR WHOLE ASS OUT OKAY. He’s so strong it’s left you with a little bit of an obsession towards his touch. He lifts your ass up easily enough with how he pushes your thighs open and by the time he’s getting around to lapping the crack of your ass and circling your anus you’re a complete mess. You’re squirting, screaming and shaking but it’s barely been three minutes…he has the time to go a little longer. 5 minutes, maybe 6 since he’s feeling extra relaxed at this point.
Sasori
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He’s so sick and evil please😭😭 why does getting your pussy ate out have to be so intense and overwhelming. And you might need to endure a little bit of pain to experience those orgasms that make you feel like you’re turning into another creature. He loves to study you and your body, how certain things will drive you crazy and how other things you can handle better.
Sasori is surprisingly a loyal pleaser, he always strives to send you over the moon and he now understands that the more pleasure you experience the easier it is for you to handle penetration. He loves penetrating you while eating you out, yes with his fingers and they feel so good you can literally envision the way he makes you feel, but he also gets a kick out of seeing the toys he meticulously designed fit inside of you, one inside your anus and one inside your vagina. The one inside your vagina just vibrates, starting from a low buzz and gradually growing more intense, that you’ll eventually have orgasms that could last the whole session, while the you that goes inside your vagina is the one he plays around with, fucking you with it while he devours your clit. Sometimes he will pull the toy inside your vagina out to replace it with his own tongue and slurp up the mess you’re making. 😭🙈
Hidan
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Hidan loves spanking yes, but not he’s not about your ass. When you’re enjoying an intense orgasm, crying, or fussing enough to annoy him, especially while he’s in the zone, spreading your lips apart to directly stimulate your exposed bean, but gentle licks is enough to send you into spasms. When it gets difficult to keep you in one position, he straightens up and smacks your titties, loves to slap both of them, until your promise him you’ll sit still. You know the drill.
But the reality is you’re not going to be able to stay in one position with how he’s not giving your a break, constantly licking your vulva, unintentionally stimulating your g spot every time his tongue slips inside of you, taking his sweet time, his eyes shut to really taste you. So he opens his eyes and frowns, sitting upright to start smacking your breasts again.
He makes you cry when he does this because it’s really not fair, and damn you because your years will tug at his heart enough to convince him you deserve a break. He’s actually kinda sweet though, because when you begin to really cry and beg him to wait, he will find something else to do until you’re ready for round two, massaging your boob in one hand while he’s warm mouth is suckling the other, and your beautiful skin is always covered in dark patches from the millions of of hickies he leaves all over you, especially your chest and neck area when he’s giving you a break.
In between kisses he checks on you. “Hey”, he whispers as to not startle you, your eyes fluttering as they open up to see him. You should answer him when he’s done planting soft kisses against your softer lips. “hey”, you respond in the softest voice, he immediately has the urge to wrap his arms around you, squeezing you tight. “Intense right.. babyy, are you okay?”, he whispers in your ear. “Yes I’m okay, thank you”. “May I continue?”, he asks placing a kiss against your temple, already leaving a trail of kiss as he repositions himself between your legs.
This time around he’s a little meaner, praising you for constantly squirting on him while he’s devouring you, your orgasms so intense it doesn’t take too long for you to start throwing another tantrum. He’s so good at handling you🥺
Itachi
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Itachi🥺 he loves talking to you during foreplay. He’s also constantly flirting with you, that probably explains why you’re always horny. He knows what he’s doing because Itachi LOVES pleasuring you with his mouth. Whether it’s verbally or physically, he never fails to make you feel so so good.
Itachi will eat you until a whiny mess and he talks you through all of it. “Tachi!’ I can’t take it uhhhh!!!!”, you whine, Itachi not stopping the stroke of his tongue against your clit until you have this orgasm. He doesn’t like ruining your orgasms, so he’s rather just make you nut and give you a break after, no matter how intense the orgasm is. You’re going to have it until you calm yourself. “There you go sweet girl”, he pants, mesmerized by the way you’re squirting and the noises you’re making, screaming while he’s literally just watching you cum. “Baby”, he smiles, “I love watching my pretty girl squirt like this. Thank you baby”. “I- o-okay—“, you try and speak but that orgasm was rather overwhelming.
Your inability to get yourself together always amuses him, he loves doing this to you. “My pretty girl”, he says, leaning forward to finally kiss you, his fingers slowly separating your folds, the pad of his middle finger rubbing your clit in left to right strokes, the speed increasing, quickly leaving you unable to kiss him in return. He smiles again, amused. Your clit is so sensitive and you’re so sweet and responsive, the demon inside of him wants to come out and play. Now even though you’re screaming from such simple actions, he still wants to see you have another orgasm, despite the intensity.
But he’s loving and sweet with how he handles the situation you don’t realize he’s the reason why you find yourself able to make it to orgasm number 4 in just one round😫
Kisame
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Like Kakuzu, Kisame is also really tall and bulky, and uses that to his advantage whenever he can, even when he’s trying to pleasure his precious lover😞
He loves him some foreplay and loves using his fingers before he finishes you off with his mouth. He loves you between his thighs with you back resting against his chest, and with his free hand leading your boobs, his other hand is rapidly flicking at your clitoris, bringing you to multiple orgasms while you squirm and convulsive between his legs, yet he easily holds you snug against him. He might even place his own legs over yours and bring you to another orgasm. You’re guaranteed to squirt when he bullies you like this. Sometimes he would make you sit on his dick while he does this to your poor clit, but let’s get into that some other time…
He loves for you to sit on his face, sit on his face and ride him. Don’t stop though because that might aggravate him😭 and slowly make him feel like he has to be a little more aggressive. “Cmon baby, what’s the matter?”, he frowns, smacking your ass hard before sitting you right back on his mouth, the grip of his hands on your hips is so strong you don’t even try and escape, succumbing to your fate of back breaking orgasms. Tomorrow your back will certainly remind you of this moment right here with how often you arch. But you’re grateful for your morning yoga sessions because those help a lot with any body aches you might have, unless Kisame walks in on you in that downward dog position, then he suddenly wants to do some yoga with you. You both know why he’s really here and it’s going to end with his head between your thighs.
But if it’s not for face riding please let him eat you out on all fours. Lawd he’s so aggressive and might make you wanna tap out from the overstimulation. And in this position you’re so exposed, he buries his face nose between your ass cheeks, might enjoy sniffing your anus while he’s devouring you, his tongue lapping at your clit while he shakes his head, making all kinds of grunt and groaning sounds to show you how much he’s enjoying this. And while you’re pushing his head band begging him to stop he makes more sounds while casually smacking your hands out the way.
He can and will tongue fuck you to tears carefully observing your face while he shoves it inside of you with force, making you crumble and cum right then and there.
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jellyfishoof · 2 months
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Random Headcanons of Akatsuki on whether I think they're a drinker or a smoker
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𝔓𝔞𝔦𝔫 ~ smoker (mainly)
I would assume that he would be the type to smoke. Now as to what exactly, I see him as the type to hit a bong, maybe even a hookah….maybe tho. I could also see him as someone who drinks, but would only drink a bottle and nothing more than that.
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𝔎𝔬𝔫𝔞𝔫 ~ drinker
I see her as the type to mainly intake alcohol. Soft drinks, cocktails, and wine are all alcohol beverages that she would drink. If she wants to be a bit more moderate with her intake of alcohol, she’ll drink a mojito or piña colada. However, when she wants to wash down her stress she’ll gulp down a bottle of Château Lafite Rothschil.
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𝔒𝔟𝔦𝔱𝔬 ~ heavy drinker
Alright, I'm sure we all know why :(
Its mainly because of Rin. He fr can't get over her loss. I meannn its the whole reason why some some unfortunate events take place. So to no ones surprise, he would drink to the point of blacking out. Any type of drink will do. Anything that will get him drunk enough to forget a bit about the pain of losing her.
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ℑ𝔱𝔞𝔠𝔥𝔦 ~ drinker
I see him as the type to drink sake. And only drinking the finest sake at that. Trying to keep things traditional and shit like that. I guess its the Uchiha in him wanting to maintain tradition by indulging in his culture.
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𝔎𝔦𝔰𝔞𝔪𝔢 ~ drinker (sometimes)
He drinks sometimes not often. I feel like he complains about how the alcohol dries up his mouth a lot, so he won't drink as often. He’ll probably only drink when offered. Otherwise, he would prefer water over anything.
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𝔎𝔞𝔨𝔲𝔷𝔲 - a little bit of both
Dealing with Hidan all the time, I can see him smoking a blunt and trying to get high enough that he can drown out Hidan’s constant bickering. Same with drinking, he would drink a lot but not to the point of passing out drunk. He still gotta focus on chasing that bag, but wants to do it without dealing with Hidan’s moaning and bitching.
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ℌ𝔦𝔡𝔞𝔫 ~ definitely both
Hardcore drinker and smoker. Will for sure drink vodka on a mundane Wednesday afternoon. Does not care when, what or where; he just needs something to stimulate him. And when drinking or smoking isn't enough he’ll resort to cocaine and other measures to be at that right state of mind.
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𝔇𝔢𝔦𝔡𝔞𝔯𝔞 ~ both
Being young and all I see him trying to experiment with drugs, though not as hardcore like Hidan. He would stick with smoking and drinking, but would most likely be excessive with it. He for sure would be a pothead and will have a smoking sesh with Pain. I see him as the type to also make his own drinks by mixing random shit.
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𝔖𝔞𝔰𝔬𝔯𝔦 ~ neither
He's basically a puppet. And I think its been said that he doesn't eat or drink either for that same reason. Though, if he wasn't a puppet, I would say that he'd be a casual drinker like Konan, possibly even like Kisame in that he'd only drink when offered.
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nail-art-no-jutsu · 4 months
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Inspired by this post
I absolutely love kakuhida fics in which Hidan's company has positive effects on Kakuzu's mood, like
💓he's immortal, there's no point in trying to kill him when he gets annoying or for any reason, so why even try => Kakuzu is calmer and more patient as a result whether he likes it or not (not him getting softer in his old age) not just with Hidan but with the other Akatsuki members, I love to see it
💓Hidan is just a breath of fresh air in Kakuzu's stale rotten wilted experience that he thought would never change, he's obnoxious and he gets peeved by the tiniest things and he's just so different from Kakuzu and having no choice but to interact with someone so opposite to you can bring enrichment to your enclosure
💓Hidan is so reckless and it brings out Kakuzu's protective side
💓and last but certainly not least, that chest and that ass and what that mouth can do when it's not rambling about hell knows what
💓bonus heart so there's five
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nardo-headcanons · 1 year
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Naruto Worldbuilding headcanon!
Every Ninja village/Realm has its own language.
Since Konoha is the strongest village, their language is taught as the standard foreign language in other villages. Konoha Nin are sometimes seen as obnoxious and arrogant for expecting every person from an other country to understand their language.
Kirigakure has a language that sounds like the flow of water, but a bit nasal. Coincidentally, it sounds very fancy and melodic despite the majority of its population being rather poor. The fishermen of their wave realm have their own dialect.
Kumogakure has made a great effort to make their language as easy to learn as possible. It’s part of the reason why it has the strongest economy. Anyone who wants to do business stuff or work in finance is basically required to learn the language. (And yes, Kakuzu speaks it) It’s described as sounding cool and badass.
Iwagakure‘s language is described as sounding similar to Konoha‘s, but sounding way goofier and happier. They have a lot of different dialects, with even Iwa-Nin having difficulties communicating to each other.
The language that is spoken in Sunagakure sounds breathy and ethereal. It’s the oldest language in the shinobi world. It’s also the hardest language to learn for other shinobi with any foreigners who speak it being looked at with admiration.
In Otogakure, Konoha‘s language is spoken.
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wing-ed-thing · 11 months
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Kakuzu Platonic Relationship Headcanons
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Tags: No Reader Pronouns
𓆃 Uh... friends is a strong word, isn't it?
𓆃 Because Kakuzu doesn't have friends, and he likes it that way! So the best you're going to get is "regular interaction" or "work proximity associates".
𓆃 If you're someone that Kakuzu interacts with as he works, such as in the bounty business, you would be a "regular interaction." If you operate together, you are a "work proximity associate" or "associate" for short.
𓆃 And the only true way to get on Kakuzu's good side and stay there is a dangerously simple mix of shared opinions and shared values.
𓆃 Like a typical old-timer, Kakuzu believes mostly conservative views on shinobi work and politics, and above all, a cynical view on money.
𓆃 Anything eccentric is a surefire way to lose his favor, and anything too "progressive" will surely lose his favor. Really, it's tempting to tell Kakuzu that market-bought paper bombs are more effective and practical than hand-written ones, but why would you?
𓆃 "It's a waste of precious coin," he'll grumble disapprovingly. "Buying jutsu is a disgrace."
𓆃 Granted, he doesn't lecture. He's too impatient for that, but pushing Kakuzu is akin to a jack-in-the-box. You never know what's the final straw before he'll explode.
𓆃 Your best bet is to prove yourself and lean into his grumpiness. Learning to read his subtle shifts in mood is a plus so that you can stop talking.
𓆃 Finance and politics are great conversation topics to stick to.
𓆃 If you're lucky, you might be able to hold a conversation with Kakuzu for a solid hour if you start talking the pros and cons of various types of investments.
𓆃 Or on politics. If you get the news before he does, you can inform him about whatever stupid thing is happening in the Hidden Grass. It allows you to gauge his reactions to agree with.
𓆃 Kakuzu is also secretly one for gossip. He'd never admit how much he absolutely loves hearing about how the daimyō's daughter from the Land of Wind just had a messy divorce.
𓆃 "Can't mean good things for their treaty with the Land of Earth," he'd say, crossing his arms with a shake of his head.
𓆃 "I heard in the last village that the prince was caught in quite the scandalous and compromising position" is enough to make Kakuzu eye you in quiet, subtle anticipation.
𓆃 Kakuzu is like the dad who says he doesn't care about your trash reality TV show but stands behind the couch to watch.
𓆃 But staying alive isn't just about making good conversation with Kakuzu.
𓆃 He's opportunistic and will not stand to keep company that he perceives as weak. While there are a multitude of petty things that could lead to a kill from Kakuzu, perceived weakness is at the top of them.
𓆃 Feeling like you're on a good track with Kakuzu is easy to lean into. Walking away from a few interactions feeling like you're getting closer is something that you do not want to get lost in.
𓆃 Because no matter how much you know about investments or scandals, if you make him angry enough, Kakuzu will not hesitate to end your life. And the tally he keeps is invisible.
Thank you to all who liked, reblogged, followed, and supported. Your support means so much and is greatly appreciated.
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effeminateboyninja · 1 year
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akatsuki music hcs
↻ ◁ II ▷ ↺
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I can’t listen to a song without making it about characters so here’s some headcanons for what kind of music each of the Akatsuki characters would like/listen to
more here:
konoha 13 | jonin sensei | sand siblings |
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Pain/Nagato - TOOL // Opeth // Nirvana // Swallow the Sun // Daylight Dies // The Foreshadowing // Alice in Chains // Mad Season
Konan - The Cure // Echo & the Bunnymen // Bauhaus // Siouxsie and the Banshees // Timber Timbre // Mitski
Kisame - The Rolling Stones // The Doors // The Animals // Judas Priest // Black Sabbath // Led Zeppelin // Dio // Ghost
Itachi - Radiohead // Manchester Orchestra // Duster // waveform* // sssense // kees. // Beach House
Deidara - 3OH!3 // Cobra Starship // Panic! at the Disco // Mäneskin // Teenage Disaster // Afourteen // Danny Brown // Cxrpse
Sasori - silence // white noise
Hidan - Nine Inch Nails // Korn // Rob Zombie // Orgy // Skinny Puppy // Sister Machine Gun // PIG // Skold
Kakuzu - the steady hum of his money counter
Tobi - Aqua // 100 gecs // Jimmy Buffet // NSYNC // Crazy Frog // the Cats soundtrack // PSY // Kidz Bop Kids
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BONUS: Orochimaru - a notice from the medical malpractice board read aloud // the wet, gurgling, nubile sounds of a lab engineered fetus taking it’s first breaths (1hr loop) // Slayyyter
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suvidrache · 2 months
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Hello! May I request Zetsu, Kakuzo and Kizame with a demon s/o who never let them touch too close to their horns, the reason is that s/o horns are very sensitive and make them start to purr and move their tail around (kinda like a cat) please?
(sorry for any errors, English is not my first language!)
S/O With Horns
age in bio when interacting. minors do not interact.
Word Count: 248 | Read it on AO3 | Tag List
Featuring: Zetsu, Kakuzu, and Kisame
Author's Note: I do hope that this was what you wanted. Also, your English is fine! 🩵
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Zetsu completely gets it. He's not a human. He doesn't judge you in any way. White Zetsu is completely innocently curious about you. He asks genuine questions. Black Zetsu, depending on how long you've been together, would be the exact opposite. White would only touch your horns with permission and would talk about how cute your purrs were. Black only touched them when you pissed him off. He's angry; now you are, too.
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Kakuzu is completely oblivious to your appearance. You begin to doubt that he actually pays attention to you. It wasn't until one day that you were both headed to bed. He reached over and stroked your horn. An attempt to remove the thing sticking out of your head. You purred and swatted his hand away. He simply smiled, whether to touch you again or talk about the horns on your head. He wasn't quite sure what he wanted to do first.
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He's not exactly human-looking. Kisame gets it. There's no judgment from him. He supports you in any way and will fight those who speak badly to you. He's not going to pet your horns without permission. When he hears you making noise, he can't help but smile. Only when you are both at home will he ever touch your horns to hear your purrs. He also has a tendency to growl when you touch certain parts of him (similar to your purrs, and only when you both are alone and in a teasing mood).
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© SUVIDRACHE — do not copy, translate, modify, or plagiarize my work. reblogs are appreciated!
Tag List: @eli-chris
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kankuroplease · 1 year
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Do you have any hcs for kakuzus personality during the founders era
Honestly, I think pre his fight with Hashirama, he was probably a much kinder and optimistic person.
The reason why I think this is his actions towards his village afterwards and the hatred he still carries for it reads like they took a part of him. And as someone else pointed out, it’s stated that his years have hardened him basically. So he had to have been different than the character we’ve all come to know.
Possible personality (Pre-fight)
Confident, boarding cocky but in a playful manner
A bit of a lone wolf, but not socially awkward. More of an occupational thing.
Sarcastic big brother type. He’ll listen and give advice.
Studious/competitive
Possibly flirty come on, he’s good looking and sharp tongued. There’s way he wasn’t a LITTLE bit flirtatious
Selfless/self sacrificing (now this is the part I think he’s enraged about)
Him afterwards/pre-akatsuki
Bad tempered but not as dangerous with it as he is later on. Basically survival when irritating him is slightly higher 🥲
Direct. Doesn’t like wasting his time.
He’s learning to put himself first and be more selfish. Both in good and negative ways
The start of his avaricious journey ✨ probably not that good at saving his cash at first tho
Unforthcoming. Still a great listener but 9/10 wont give you anything in return for your information if there’s nothing to gain from it.
A bit sad if you squint. He would never admit this though
He may still hope there’s some good in others outside his village, but his trust is hard earned. This can also lead to his lack of empathy later on because living so long, seeing peoples wicked sides, seeing the crimes they commit, blah blah blah
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or0ch1maru · 1 month
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18+, minors, ageless, and troll blogs DNI
just imagine your partner coming home after a particularly bad mission. barely giving you time to acknowledge their presence before they have your face mushed into the carpet. their cock bullying its way into your warm walls. getting lost in the way you squirt against them as they keep up with their relentless pace. groaning as a white ring forms at the base of their dick. their nails leaving crescent shaped marks on your hips from how tightly they’re gripping you. your back so deeply arched that you know you’ll be feeling it tomorrow but not caring as you go drunk on your lovers cock. their signature wolfy grin forming on their face as they watch your eyes roll back and drool pooling on the floor under you..
HIDAN, KAKUZU, KISAME, ZABUZA, JUZO, Itachi, deidara, Sasori, pain, Konan, Orochimaru, Zetsu, Obito, TOJI, SUGURU, SATORU, SUKUNA, Nanami, Shoko, GRIMMJOW, KENPACHI, KID, ZORO, CROCODILE, Mihawk, Buggy, & whoever else..
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cosmic-glow · 1 year
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Warnings: Kakuzu x gn!reader; bad language!; Kakuzu being slow with his own feelings; SFW.
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Everyone at Akatsuki was used to the treasurer's standard bad mood, the only time he seemed calm was when he was counting his money, but lately not even that. The organization wasn't doing badly, on the contrary, now with one more member they were even more in demand for missions. The new member was you, another wanted S-rank ninja. Even though you often worked alone, you were able to carry out missions perfectly, which was admirable given that you were one of the youngest members.
You were feared, but not by the people in the organization, just as you didn't fear any of them, which is why you were so friendly with everyone, always making conversation and offering to help. That got on Kakuzu's nerves.
You were beautiful, smart, educated, skilled and above all kind, what the fuck were you doing in that end of the world surrounded by murderers and terrorists? Of course, you were also wanted for murder and several other things, but you had everything to be someone more decent, why did you end up there? Why was you always smiling? Why did it torment Kakuzu's thoughts so much? You were the reason he was so stressed, he couldn't get you out of his head and he still didn't know why, or rather, he ignored the obvious reason.
- Whoa, hey Kakuzu! I just got here, need help with something? - you entered the office, as if you had just read his mind.
- No. - he said wanting you to leave him alone again.
Kakuzu was without his usual mask, his hair tied back in a bun, more at ease, he turned to face you with those piercing green eyes, the usual frown even clearer. It was the first time you'd seen him like this, the first time you'd seen his scars on the side of his mouth, the seam badly done because it was the first he'd done, and even so you didn't tremble, you didn't waver a single muscle, you kept smiling. How did you manage to be so kind-hearted and so cold-blooded during fights? How could you attract him more and more? The "stress" only increased.
- Did something happen? You look angry.
- You should have gotten used to it by now. - he turned his back, hoping that by the time he turned again you would have gone, but that's not what happened.
- Are you sure you don't want help?
- Are you deaf or what? Get out of here.
From the peripheral vision, Kakuzu could see you taking a deep breath, trying to control yourself, but you couldn't take it, you slammed your hand against the table letting out an "okay, I'm done!", he looked up at you, surprised but not wanting to show it , it was the first time he saw you get worked up.
- Every time I try to have a civil conversation with you it's like this, since I joined I hear how you provide everything I ask in advance compared to the other members, but every time I try to be nice to thank you you treat me like garbage, Tell me man, what the fuck did I do to you?! - your breathing became irregular after releasing everything that was tormenting you.
- ... What did you expect from me? A "welcome" along with a golden star every time you returned from missions? Look around you, we're not that kind, don't feel special just because I thought to be kind to you in your early days. We are not friends, don't act like it.
- Then why do you still care? Why do you still think of me before them?!
- Look, actually I'd love not to think about you all the fucking time if you ask me! I just thought that if I got rid of your problems soon, I would stop thinking about you too!
Kakuzu, blinded by not wanting to accept what he was feeling, couldn't understand the feeling either, which he interpreted as anger, but your face flushed as you suspected what it was, understanding what he was feeling better than he did.
- Do you think about me? - your voice softened.
- More than I'd like! Your stupid face keeps popping up in my head! It doesn't let me concentrate on anything! - he complained, still not understanding what he felt and making it even more obvious to you.
Realizing that he had no idea of the weight of his own words, you laughed, finding it cute how even though he has 5, the heart was still a mystery to Kakuzu.
- Maybe you worry? For some reason? - you suggested when you noticed him staring at you, even more irritated because of your laugh.
- Yes I do, and that's the problem, it makes no sense. But when I realize it, I've already convinced Pein to leave you with the safest mission, I've ordered your weapons, I've done everything and it still doesn't seem enough, I feel like I'm sick - he sits tiredly in the armchair, covering part of his face while pressing the back of the nose.
Then a little guilt falls on you for laughing at him. You forgot that Kakuzu was much older than you, he shouldn't even remember what it was like to be attracted to someone, to fall in love, to love. He was now a cold-blooded killer, with his only reliable friend being his money, and after so many years it was obvious that he would no longer remember what it was like to want to care for someone. It had only been a few years for you and yet the idea now of wanting to protect someone without an obvious motive, written in capital letters on a piece of paper with a reward amount next to it, was also strange.
- Look, if you must know... It's the first time in a long time that someone cares about me like this - you tried to fix things. He looked at you for a while, silent.
- Well... It's the first time in a long time that I'm worried like this about someone too - he spoke, finally understanding what it could be.
You softly smiled at him, both of you curious as to where this would lead.
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Sorry for any typos;
Buy me a coffee?
Drabbles Game
Masterlist;
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thebloodredraven · 2 years
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art cred
🕷 The Akatsuki (Naruto/Naruto Shippuden) 🕷
Who I write for:  ━ All of the original Akatsuki in the iteration from the image above except Zetsu (note: I am still in the middle of watching Shippuden and have not met Tobi as Obito yet) FLUFF - 🌸 || SUGGESTIVE - 🍷 || SMUT - 🔞 || ANGST - 🌧
SCENARIOS/IMAGINES
━ coming soon!
HEADCANONS
Akatsuki ━ Insecurities || bonus: kisame  🌧
━ Secret Kinks  🔞     part one || part two
━ Watching Happy Tree Friends
Itachi ━ coming soon!
Kakuzu ━ coming soon!
Konan ━ coming soon!
Nagato/Pein ━ kinky headcanons 🔞
FICS
Itachi ━ Back in Black (drabble)  🌧
BONUS
━ the dehumanization and objectification of sasuke uchiha (essay)
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🕷 Blood Plus (anime) 🕷
Who I write for: ━ Haji ━ Saya Otonashi ━ Diva ━ Solomon Goldsmith ━ Amshel Goldsmith ━ Kai Miyagusuku (peri-hibernation only for nsfw) ━ George Miyagusuku ━ Nathan Mahler ━ Karl Fei-Ong ━ David ━ Julia ━ Min (sfw only) ━ Mui (sfw only)
FLUFF - 🌸 || SUGGESTIVE - 🍷 || SMUT - 🔞 || ANGST - 🌧
SCENARIOS/IMAGINES
━ coming soon!
HEADCANONS
Haji ━ NSFW Alphabet (WIP)  🔞
- Headcanons (hypothetical fic)
FICS
━ unavailable for now
SCENARIOS/ONESHOTS
━ coming soon!
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Notes: ━ i work full time and do not have the attention or ability to be able to write long fics at the moment. that may change over time but for now, i’m sticking to short form work. ━ any and all iterations of the characters I write for are assumed to be 20+ for nsfw work  ━ sfw + nsfw, minors dni (will soft block anyone that doesn’t have their age visible) ━ hard limits: scat/golden showers, spit kink, a/b/o, large age gap (human muses), vomit kink, incest ━ i am uncomfortable writing male!reader for nsfw, but everything else is fine. please specify gender when requesting ━ as i add onto this list, all characters will be categorized in alphabetical order ━ please bother me about blood plus, this fandom is on its last legs and the same guy that did itachi’s english dub is haji. haji is an aggressively romantic and pouty possessive vampire that plays the cello. do with that what you will. ━ black af. take your racism elsewhere.
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dark-konohagakure2 · 1 month
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Hi! Could you please write an Akatsuki X reader scenario where they kidnap shinobi Reader and the best way to convert her to their cause is by fucking her until she breaks? (If you could include Obito that would be awesome too)
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tw: noncon, forced kissing, degradation, nipple play, abuse, mind break, forced orgasm, overstimulation, biting
All characters depicted are 18+
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Deidara knows firsthand just how bothersome it is to be forcibly recruited into the Akatsuki, but despite the shared experience he isn't very empathetic when he tells the young kunoichi that she has no choice but to join their ranks, either willingly or by force.
The girl is loyal to her village, so she'll initially refuse, which angers the blonde artist. He didn't have a choice when it came to his recruitment, so why should she? Deidara is going to make her join, and he knows just how to do it.
Despite his being a lean man, he's very strong, so Deidara is able to knock her backwards with her clay and pin her down with his body, sitting on her chest as he holds her wrists with one hand and covers her mouth with the palm of his other hand, using the mouth on that hand to forcibly kiss her.
The tongue on his palm will force it's way down her throat, making her gag as Deidara rips her clothes off with the other hand, practically salivating at the sight of her perfect breasts, but he doesn't have time to enjoy the scenery when his main goal is to force her over to the Akatsuki's side.
Deidara isn't one to pull his punches verbally or physically, bullying his cock inside of her vulnerable entrance, manhandling her into whatever position works best for him as he shouts threats and insults at her.
"Cmon you little idiot! Just agree to join before I get more forceful, hmm! I'm not gonna stop until you say yes, un!"
He'll force his hand-mouths onto her breasts, using them to lick, bite, and suck her sensitive nipples, his actual mouth forcibly on hers as he pounds into her, the wet sound of skin slapping against skin filling the air as Deidara shoves his tongue down her throat.
He isn't very experienced due to his age and eccentric personality, so he's just fast and rough when he fucks, his his slamming against her ass while his only goals in mind are to convert her over to the Akatsuki's side and get his rocks off, and there is nothing she can do about it.
Deidara will have her overwhelmed from the bombardment of stimulus from his hands, mouths, and cock, he'll leave her whining and squirting underneath him despite herself, much to the artist's delight and smugness.
Deidara is a energetic young man, so he can go for hours if he really wanted to, but he'll stop on one condition. Each time he pulls out after cumming in her, he'll ask her if she's ready to cooperate yet, and if she is; he'll stop, but if she isn't; he'll go for another round with her body.
"Ready to cooperate? Well should be! Because I'm not gonna stop fucking you until you turn into a good little Akatsuki member!"
Deidara is glad that he's able to recruit a brand new member for their little Akatsuki family, now he'll earn the respect of his senior members, and he gets to have a brand new toy to play with as a bonus.
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tw: noncon, kidnapping, drugging, aphrodisiacs, fuck or die, age difference, riding, mind break
Sasori hates dealing with new recruits, they're all just brats who know nothing about art and respect, so when he's tasked with coverting a shinobi they captured over to the Akatsuki's cause, the red haired puppet master isn't the slightest bit happy.
He feels nothing, so Sasori can't appeal to emotion in order to sway her, instead he'll use threats towards both herself, her comrades, and loved ones, but when she doesn't budge, Sasori decides to show her that his words are anything but empty threats.
Before she can even react, Sasori is already injecting her with a special poison he created just for brats such as herself, it isn't fatal in small doses, and it's designed to instill obedience in it's user, but it comes with the very unfortunate side effect of forcibly increasing her arousal levels as well.
Sasori totally didn't anticipate this side effect, but he's not going to let this unique opportunity pass him by, in fact he's going to take advantage of it. He'll force her warm and soft body onto his own cold and wooden one, forcing her onto his cock and telling her to make herself useful for once.
"Faster, brat, or do you want me to increase the dosage? Good girl, now ride it like your life depends on it, because it does."
Sasori won't make any noises, facial expressions, or even blink as she reluctantly bounces on his wood, her discomfort contrasting his indifference. If she slows down too much for his liking, Sasori will inject her yet again, although he's careful not to give her too much of his poison, he doesn't want to kill her yet.
Despite his lack of moaning or any expression at all, Sasori is rather enjoying the sight of the needy prisoner moving up and down on his cock while under the effects of poison is very satisfying to the emotionless puppet master, but the only time his satisfaction will be known is when he's cumming inside of her.
Eventually the combination of the stimulation, humiliation, and the drug is too much for the poor kunoichi to handle, being too drugged up and overwhelmed to even resist anymore, reduced bouncing on his cock and obeying his demeaning demands like a good little puppet, much to Sasori's satisfaction.
Sasori won't even bother to hold back his taunts at her expense, finding it incredibly satisfying that he was able to reduce a respectable ninja to his own personal puppet with just a few injections and his cock.
"Good little puppet, you'll make a perfect pawn for the Akatsuki, and the perfect hole for my cock..."
Before he knows it, the Akatsuki has a brand new member and Sasori himself has a brand new puppet to play with, which is very convenient since he's been looking for a new test dummy for his poisons.
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tw: noncon, genjutsu, mind break, size difference, fingering, forced kissing, mental torture, mild degradation
Forcing people to do things they don't want to is a rather trivial task for Itachi Uchiha, but he prefers to not use violence to get his way, so when he's tasked with forcibly recruiting a new Akatsuki member, he'll get the job done using his specialty: genjutsu.
It's almost too easy, all he needs to do is make eye contact with her, and she's all his. He won't just use a genjutsu that makes her loyal to the Akatsuki, because it would just wear off eventually which would cause problems in the future, instead he'll cast a genjutsu that will make her more susceptible to his demands and advances.
Itachi is much bigger and stronger than she is, especially when she's in such a state, so it's not much of a challenge for him to take advantage of her, slipping his hand into her panties and his tongue into her mouth while she squirms in his grasp, under the effects of his sense heightening genjutsu.
His enjoyment won't be very evident on his face due to his stoic nature, but it's most certainly evident in his pants, the bulge in his pants pressed against her clothed pussy as his fingers move inside of her and he speaks to her in his usual flat tone, yet with a hint of mockery underneath.
"This feels uncomfortable doesn't it? I would stop if you would just cooperate, but I can plainly see that someone like you wouldn't know compromise if it stabbed you in the face..."
Eventually he'll pull his fingers out of her, which is somewhat difficult with how tightly her cunt is squeezing them, although her pussy won't be left empty for very long once Itachi forces his cock into her, hitting even deeper places inside of her that his fingers couldn't reach, such as her precious womb.
Itachi doesn't just jackhammer into her like a uncouth mutt, instead his pace incredibly slow, bordering on torturous as his cock slowly stretches her out and hits her womb with each thrust, his cock forcing her into submission better than any genjutsu ever could.
He'll have her whimpering and squirming underneath him in a matter off seconds, reapplying the genjutsu on her whenever she fights back too much, eventually she'll be so deep in the genjutsu that she won't be able to distinguish between reality and illusion, she won't even be able to tell if she's actually getting fucked or if it's just another genjutsu, it's an incredibly disorienting and terrifying experience, one that Itachi tells her she can end anytime if she just cooperates with the Akatsuki.
Eventually she'll become so disoriented and overwhelmed by both the illusion she's under and the sensation of him roughly fucking her that she'll practically burst into tears, weakly whimpering and sniffling as she begs Itachi to stop the genjutsu already, she won't even ask him to stop fucking her, she just wants to be free of the illusion, and if she agrees to the Akatsuki's terms, he'll gladly oblige her.
"Good girl. See? That wasn't so hard was it? All you had to do was ask nicely, it's quite simple really, even for someone so bereft of knowledge..."
He isn't surprised that she ended up caving to his demands, mental torture is his forte, and if she ever steps out of line with the Akatsuki's goals again, he'll have no qualms about giving her another 72 hours worth of suffering.
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tw: noncon, size difference, double penetration, monster cocks, mind break, creampie, breeding, biting, degradation
In terms of physical appearance, Kisame is the most terrifying member of the Akatsuki, standing at nearly 7 feet tall with a set of razor sharp teeth and a shark-like appearance, he's the best in the organization at intimidation, and Kisame is more than happy to use brute force when attempting to force a potential recruit over to the Akatsuki's side.
Usually just flashing his teeth or brandishing Samehada is more than enough for Kisame to get his way, but when his dear little prisoner future coworker doesn't give in, Kisame decides he needs to take a much more rough and physical approach with her, the blue skinned man has been rather pent up as of late, and dealing with a brat is just increasing his frustrations, so he decides to kill two birds with one stone.
He's a brute, so he'll just throw here down onto the ground and force himself on top of her, his body huge compared to her slight form, Kisame practically moans at the sight of her eyes widening in terror when she feels his massive bulges rubbing against her, making it more than clear what Kisame is going to be taking from her.
Her pussy is almost comically tiny compared to Kisame's twin cocks, it would be damn near impossible for him to fit even one of his huge members inside of her virgin cunt, but Kisame Hoshigaki has never been one to let a little bit of difficulty stop him from getting what he wants from someone.
"Oh come now, don't go whining and crying on me yet! You don't even have the first one all the way in yet! So save your bellyaching for when they're both deep inside of you, sweetie..."
Befitting his appearance and reputation, Kisame is rough when he fucks, forcibly cramming both of his cocks into her tight pussy as he pounds into her, his huge body engulfing her's entirely while he's having the time of his life turning her body into his personal cocksleeve.
Kisame is a biter, he just can't help himself, it's in his nature after all, and he especially can't hold back his more primal urges when his cocks are balls deep inside of her and he's cumming directly into her fertile womb, his sharp teeth digging into her neck hard enough to draw blood, and when sharks see blood, they go into a feeding frenzy.
Kisame's sheer size is all the more apparent when his entire muscular weight is pressed down on her as he rearranges her insides with his cock, his huge body smothering her only adds to the poor girl's disoriented state, it's nearly impossible to breathe when a giant shark man is on top of her and using her as his breeding toy.
When Kisame eventually cums inside of her, he cums a lot, emptying his huge balls into her sensitive little womb, and the poor kunoichi is left completely cockdrunk just from one round of Kisame bullying her poor pussy with his big cocks.
"Oh how cute! You did didn't even last one single round! What was our leader thinking asking a pathetic weakling like you to join our little family..?"
This entire experience has once again reminded Kisame why he just adores newbies so much, they're so weak and overconfident even when against someone as fearsome like him, and the stubborn toys are all the more fun to break.
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tw: noncon, sadomasochism, abuse, degradation, fuck or die, misogyny, slapping, blood play, fear play
It's no surprise that a sadist like Hidan loves nothing more than causing distress and pain to others, even if it isn't for his religion or organization, so he's as giddy as a schoolgirl when he's given the task of forcing their latest recruit into submission, and if there's something that brings Hidan joy, it's forcing people.
He isn't the strongest in the Akatsuki, but he's one of if not the scariest member when it comes to just how unwaveringly brutal and heartless he is, and not only is Hidan brutal, he's also a complete pervert, a fact that will become almost instantly apparent to his already scared captive when he starts groping her and talking about how pretty of sacrifice she would make to Lord Jashin.
Hidan hurts people as easily as he breathes, so the morally bankrupt Jashinist has absolutely no qualms about forcing himself onto someone, it's like a power trip to him when he gets to have complete free reign over the organization's prisoners, subjecting them to his depraved whims at his leisure.
The white haired man will absolutely love it when she desperately fights back, kicking and scratching at him with the futile hope of getting him to back off, but getting hurt by her mid-fuck just turns Hidan on even more, he's the kind of man who loves both giving and receiving some of that sweet pain.
"Ohh..! F-Fuuuck yes~! Keep fighting me like that, babe~! It just makes me want to hurt ya right back, you feisty bitch!"
While Hidan really does love receiving pain, he's still going to return the favor tenfold, he'll slap her across the face for every kick that lands, and practically stab her with his spike each time she scratches at him. See? Hidan isn't a selfish lover at all! He's returning all of the sweet, addictive pain she's so graciously giving him, she should be thanking him really.
Hidan has the highest sex drive out of all his comrades, practically using her as a pocket pussy to empty his balls into, and to no ones shock, he doesn't even try to be gentle, forcing his fat cock in and out of her with the main goal of getting his rocks off, slapping her ass or breasts with each rough and sloppy thrust.
She'll inevitably start to bleed a little bit from how many times he's bitten her or poked her with his sharp weapons, but that won't deter Hidan in the slightest, in fact it'll only excite him more, and he'll even lick up the blood from her wounds, resulting in his skin taking on it's skeletal pattern, which only terrifies her all the more.
It doesn't take too long for his sheer sadism and brutality to take a toll on her, and she's begging him to stop, sobbing that she'll do whatever the Akatsuki says as long as Hidan just stops. Hidan is incredibly annoyed and disappointed that his fun is being cut short, and all because she can't handle him going easy on her.
"Huh?! Done already?! Geez, this is just what happens when ya let the broads join the boy's club, but fine! Welcome to the Akatsuki, you whiny cunt!"
Hidan isn't particularly happy about having another shrill pussy with legs in the same organization as him, but he manages to look on the bright side of things; at least he doesn't need to go down the street corner for a quick fuck anymore, now he only needs to go down the hall.
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tw: noncon, age difference, size difference, tentacles, gaping, degradation, misogyny, bondage, anal
Kakuzu hates newbies, they're all brats without a shred of respect for their elders, it's bad enough that he has to put up with Hidan's nonsense, but now he has to deal with converting a new member? He's going to make her pay for his troubles, despite the fact that she wants to be there about as much as he wants her there.
He'll cut straight to the chase, plainly telling her to join the Akatsuki or else, although he doesn't elaborate at all on what the 'or else' will entail, so she doesn't take him seriously and immediately refuses. Kakuzu doesn't like that very much, he absolutely hates not being taken seriously, so the miser decides that there's no time like the present to make sure he knows that he's a very serious threat to her.
She can barely even react when his threads emerge from underneath his mask and cloak, quickly wrapping around her limbs and forcing themselves down her throat, muffling her noises of protest when the rest of his threads start slithering towards her vulnerable holes between her legs with no regard for gentleness or permission.
Kakuzu's metallic tentacles are uncomfortably harsh as they force themselves into her pussy and ass, stretching her holes out to 'prepare' them for Kakuzu's big cock, all she can do is weakly struggle and bite down on the threads in her mouth as Kakuzu gives her a stern talking to about how much of an ungrateful brat she allegedly is.
"Stop biting, brat. It hurts when you bite down on them like that. But I'll hurt you a hell of a lot more than you could ever hurt me if you don't shut up and take it."
He'll use his tentacles to spread her pussy out enough for him to get a good look at it, being sure to make sure he knows how shocked he is that she's still a virgin with how indecent she acts. Girls these days are just so disrespectful towards men, probably because none of them have a big strong daddy to put them in their place, but Kakuzu is about to change that.
His cock is just as big as the rest of him, so it will stretch her out a great deal when he forces in inside of her, even after all that preparation. Kakuzu is a product of his time, he doesn't prioritize his pleasure over her's at all, because that would imply he even considers her's in the first place.
He doesn't even really need to hold her down given how strong he is, he has her bound for his enjoyment, not his convenience. Kakuzu always finds it amusing when his prey struggles against his superior experience, and he finds it almost hilarious how she squirms against him, even with his thick meat buried balls deep inside of her.
Kakuzu doesn't really care where he cums, just as long as he does. He doesn't think it really matters if he cums inside of her, he's nearly a century old, he probably can't get her knocked up, so she can stop being so damn hysterical about such a slim possibility.
"Shut up. Trust me, idiot, I'm far too old to give anyone a baby, much less a whiny twerp like you. Besides, having a baby is all women like you are good for."
New members are always so troublesome for Kakuzu, all they do is drain the Akatsuki's finances even more, and Kakuzu is going to make sure that his dear newbie pays him back every last cent.
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tw: noncon, power imbalance, mind break, god complex, violence, piercings, humiliation, kidnapping
Pain is the leader of the Akatsuki, so he'll deal with coverting potential members more often than not. He's the best man for the job, he has the reputation, status, intimidation factor, and most importantly; he has the abilities to back all those qualities up with action. Only a fool would try to deny Pain, but it seems that his dear future subordinate is something beyond just foolish with how much she's resisting.
She can resist to her hearts content, but she's a mouse in a trap compared to his godlike powers. When she inevitably true to make a break for it, Pain will simply use Universe Pull to force her back towards him, pinning her down underneath his cold body, his body temperature being enough to nearly make her shiver, even with his cloak on, and the proximity doesn't help matters at all.
Pain's method of restraining her is swift and cruel, he'll stab one of his chakra rods straight through both of her hands, pinning them to the ground and causing immense pain, to which he shows no remorse, because he's about to show her an even more intense pain with a very different kind of rod.
His Rinnegan eyes will be locked onto her's as he forces himself on top of her. She isn't as foolish as he initially suspected, and she instantly knows what he's attempting to do to her, but Pain will pay no heed to her struggles, treating what he's about to do to her like its the most justified thing in the world.
"Enough resistance. It's futile against me. I am God, and now you'll get the privilege of witnessing what happens to those who resist God's will."
Pain's cock is both thick and pierced, so it fills her up to the brim and the cold metal of his piercings touch every inch of her untouched depths. It's hard to tell if Pain can even feel the sensations of her pussy gripping his member, since his remains cold and impassive throughout.
Its unsettling how calm Pain is throughout the ordeal, lecturing her about understanding pain and the Akatsuki's goals, all while he's pounding into her, his thick cock bullying her womb with each thrust, increasing the intensity of the agonizing mix of pleasure and pain.
He could just use his Rinnegan to put her under his control and 'tame' her, but Pain doesn't have to do that, he's physically strong enough to brute force her body into submission, and the most effective way to do that is to brute force her pussy into submission first, and the rest will follow.
Once Pain has had his fill with her holes, he won't even need to ask her if she's going to come along with him or not, she has no choice. He's already destroyed her village, so she has no choice but to join his cause or be left to die alone.
"Playtime is over, little one. It's time for business. You will join the Akatsuki, or I'll just have to put you through this torment again..."
Swaying even the most stubborn of individuals onto his side is a trivial matter for someone like Pain, it's truly amazing how a little bit of destruction and degradation can go such a far way in terms of the elimination of one's insubordination.
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tw: noncon, facesitting, suffocation, cunnilingus, rimming, age difference, piercings, power imbalance, fuck or die, humiliation
Being one of the most important members of the Akatsuki, Konan is used to recruiting new members. While she isn't a brute, Konan isn't above using physical means to get what she wants from the more particularly standoffish individuals.
Konan will attempt to negotiate at first, gently explaining the benefits of being a part of an organization as well-known and feared as the Akatsuki, and how it's much better than serving any village. But when the young woman continues to refuse Konan's kind offers, she decides to take more forceful measures.
Like a stern mother about to punish her unruly child, Konan will give the girl a few moments to reconsider her foolish choices, but when she inevitably doesn't, Konan decides to test just how stubborn someone is able to continue to act when they're unable to move or breathe underneath their superior.
Konan is a very strong woman despite her lithe physique, so she's easily able to hold the other woman down and sit on her face, pressing her entire weight down as her mature pussy presses against her face, practically suffocating the younger woman underneath her perfect ass, not budging an inch until she secures the girl's cooperation.
"Sorry, but you aren't allowed to come up for air until you agree to join the Akatsuki. If you keep squirming like that I'll simply add another ten minutes to your sentence..."
Konan is a very patient woman, she has all the time in the world, so she won't be in any rush to move from her rather comfortable seat on her face, simply occupying herself with her origami or by explaining more details about the Akatsuki and their goals, being sure to speak very highly of the organization that the girl will belong to in the very near future.
While patient, Konan is no saint, so she'll get bored of simply sitting around and waiting for the uncooperative girl to come around, so she'll demand that if she wants to live, she better get Konan off before the suffocation gets to her first, with how stern Konan sounds it's difficult to tell if she's being serious or not, but it would be foolish to take that chance.
While not usually very vocal, Konan will let out soft moans when she feels the younger woman's tongue against her perfect womanly holes, the wetness caressing the piercing on Konan's clit. If she keeps up the good work, then Konan will be more than happy to let her live.
She's a stern woman, but she isn't overly cruel, once Konan is brought to climax, she'll finally let the poor girl breathe, that is, if she agrees to the terms, and between joining a criminal organization and dying in such a humiliating way, becoming a rouge ninja is the much more preferable fate.
"That's a good girl... Now I just know you'll be a lovely fit for our great organization, you have the perfect... talents for us all to enjoy..."
Konan is very glad that the Akatsuki finally has another female member, now the purple haired woman will have someone she can go to whenever she finds herself needing a more female touch.
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tw: noncon, overstimulation, degradation, pussydrunk!Tobi, size difference, exhibitionism, humiliation
Tobi is giddy at the opportunity to prove himself to his comrades by converting their lastest member over to their cause. But there is one small problem: she doesn't take him seriously at all, and really who would? He presents himself as a bumbling and immature man child, so nobody really pays him any heed, much to Tobi's dismay.
Poor, sweet Tobi tries to be nice, he really does, but she's just so mean to him, calling him an idiot and shoving him away whenever he gets close to her. Tobi looks like he's about to give up and sulk, when the masked man suddenly remembers the advice his sempai gave him; that a true Akatsuki member needs to be cool, concise, and mean.
Tobi is shockingly strong for someone so apparently airheaded, his muscles pressed against her body as he gets on top of her, revealing a surprisingly huge bulge in his pants as he does. Tobi seems completely oblivious to the fact he's rubbing his cock up against her however, scolding her in his squeaky voice to stop squirming and being so mean to poor Tobi.
He'll act as though its a freak accident when he fat cock slips into her pussy, he'll even sheepishly apologize when it happens, but since it's already in there, Tobi decides that this is the perfect opportunity for him to get to know his new best friend even better!
"Whoopsie daisy-! You were moving too much and I slipped! Now you have to be a good girl and take responsibility for getting Tobi stuck!"
For someone who's apparently so well meaning, Tobi is incredibly rough with his new toy friend, his hips slapping against her ass while he roughly holds her in place with his gloved hands and making obnoxiously loud noises of pleasure from behind his mask, clearly he's never gotten his cock wet before judging by how whiny and overwhelmed he gets almost instantly after sticking it in.
He's so loud that it's more than likely that the entire Akatsuki can hear what he's doing behind closed doors, the more annoyed members will even chime in, telling him to 'shut up!' and 'keep it down in there!' from outside the room, the fact that her other captors can hear what's happening to her is all the more embarrassing, but Tobi is too lost in the feeling of her perfect cunt around his meat to care.
Tobi is just too pent up for his own good, recklessly dumping his load into her pussy whenever he cums (which is a lot), and he'll feign surprise when she panics about him cumming inside, he as a grown man will claim that he didn't know that was how babies were made, demonstrating that he's either completely stupid, or a brilliant actor.
After spending so much time playing with her perfectly snug pussy, Tobi loses his composure, his voice dropping multiple octaves as he let's his mask slip, although not the literal one, but even with his face still covered, it's like there's a completely different person talking now.
"Soooo are you gonna be a good little girl and join the Akatsuki? You are?! Great~!! Now learn your place in our ranks, you pathetic slut."
She's most certainly learned a very valuable lesson now, she was right in only one assessment; Tobi isn't someone to be taken seriously at all, but Obito sure as hell is.
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nail-art-no-jutsu · 5 months
Text
I'm thinking about Kakuzu and Hidan and nail polish because ofc I am, and no I don't actually want it to be a jutsu, I want all the Akatsuki to do it the hard way
Kakuzu
he learns quickly and doesn't see why others have trouble with it - especially Hidan
he does one coat and one coat only, to save up, luckily the stuff they all use is quite opaque
he's good at not getting any polish on his fingers, again, cause he wants the bottle to last as long as possible
he doesn't need his hands to turn pages while he reads, he can use his tendrils for that, so he does his nails before reading time and lets them dry
he's grateful for the dark brown, the only thing that would be worse than being partnered with Hidan would have been ending up with one of the bright colors that other Akatsuki members got
Hidan: "So there's something worse than being partnered with me?~ <3" to which Kakuzu glares
Kakuzu won't use nail polish remover cause that costs extra, he waits for that one coat to chip to the point that there's only a little bit left in the middle, and paints a new coat on top of that, and ends up with a number of bumpy layers
he's just efficient at it, it doesn't really look all that great from up close
Hidan
he absolutely sucks at painting his nails. absolutely sucks
no patience, no focus, he'll do one nail and then he'll go "Hey Kakuzu!!" cause he's already done a whole entire nail and he's bored
Kakuzu is still trying to think of some kind of way to get Hidan to associate nail polish with Jashin-sama, but no luck yet, that dark green shade is to blame, why didn't they give him red to remind him of blood? white to remind him of bones?
at one point Hidan learns to weaponize his crappy nail painting skills and make Kakuzu do his nails for him
but not by complimenting him on how much better he is, Hidan already knows that flattery won't get him anywhere - instead he "accidentally" knocks over the bottle and lets it spill, and after a very unpleasant lecture about wasting the product, Kakuzu accepts the reality that it won't get done without him
and the perfect time for that is when Hidan is lying down in his prayer circle
Hidan doesn't really start praying until Kakuzu is done painting his nails though, he likes to watch Kakuzu focus on him so intensely, just like when he stitches him up, and most importantly, he loves knowing that Kakuzu would never ever do this for anyone else <3
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nardo-headcanons · 5 months
Note
Hey my dear mutual! Another super stupid and weird request coming, so, please, feel totally free to ignore completely if you want, really. So, let's say instead of a criminal organization, the Akatsuki are actually a lab team. Which would be their roles, their work focus or their research topics? How would they behave at work with each other or, I don't know, whatever you can think of. Inspired by your agar plates post, by the way, hahahaha
Hello Sasuke, my dear. Don't call your asks weird, I love how creative they are! If anyone wants to write a fic about this please TAG me!
Big thanks to @the-real-sasuke-uchiha for requesting!
The Akatsuki in a modern research lab AU
Akatsuki Labs, Inc. No one knows what they're actually researching, and how they get their funding, however everyone hires them, they're incredibly popular with institutions and businesses alike...
Deidara is a lab rookie who is still at the beginning of his study. He went to a scientific high school and an absolute ace at chemistry. Besides studying chemistry, his other major is pyrotechnical engineering. He blows shit up on the regular and even adds copper sulphate to fires when he is the one supposed to put them out. He frequently steals minerals from the lab to use them for his pottery projects. And yes, he knows how to make meth.
Hidan is on his way to become a neurologist. He is fascinated by the way the nervous system works (especially while processing pain) and has the ego of a neurosurgeon twice his age. However he is regularly asked for a second opinion because he knows his shit. He's pretty popular with the ladies due to his confidence, however many of them are freaked out when they find out what a huge masochist he is.
I've never seen Itachi as a huge stem guy, but I've actually had a discussion about this with my dear moots @pet-plasma-bubble and @suki91 and came to the conclusion that he's either a plant biologist or studies medicine because he's one of these kids with a chronic and/or underdiagnosed illness going into medicine to make a change. Plant biologist!Itachi regularly talks to his plants when no one is looking and he gives them names as well. He doesn't really care much for the actual lab work and prefers to take care of the plants in the different lab greenhouses. Med student!Itachi is one of these anatomy girlies who draw their stuff in fancy colors and actually enjoy studying human anatomy.
Kakuzu is a senior scientist/professor who initially studied pharmacology/pharmacy to save many lives and prolong the lives of millions, but eventually got disillusioned and sold his soul to the pharma industry. He should technically be retired now, but he joined the Akatsuki labs inc to make some money on the side.
Kisame started out as a marine biologist specializing in shark research, however, seeing these beautiful, innocent creatures get bastardized by Hollywood and pollution made him apply to Akatsuki labs inc to help find solutions to the current crises caused by humanity. During his free time, he volunteers in a dolphin rehabilitation center.
Konan is the cofounder of Akatsuki labs inc, everyone respects her and even looks up to her. Once a brilliant scientist in the field of engineering, she got tired of how male dominated it was and how her male colleagues kept getting the credit for her ideas. She frequently holds lab courses for young girls interested going into the scientific field.
Nagato is the Akatsuki labs founder, and rarely seen in the lab. He has made himself a name in the field of robotics by inventing the Shurado robotics system which helps millions of automated machines run to this day. Rarely seen in the lab, he communicated with his employees via his Pain Alias Email. though to be fair, Konan writes most of these emails for him; she's the only one regularly talking to him face-to-face.
Orochimaru is a geneticist and biochemist, his focus being finding ways to avoid cellular decay, as well as the human genome and anti aging research. His parents are academics as well and he lived up to their expectations to the fullest. He has his own skincare formula which keeps him looking snatched at all times. Given the rumors about several scientific ethical code violations, everyone is kinda scared of him except for his personal lab tech, Kabuto.
Sasori is a renowed mortician who's also very interested in histology. His preparation techniques are unmatched and he even invented new preparation- and histological staining methods, which are called "Red Sand" and "Red Technique", respectively. He often gets into fights with Kakuzu about his microtome collection being unnecessarily expensive.
Tobi is the Akatsuki labs CEO cosplaying as a clueless intern that always steals from the candy bowl in the waiting room. In reality, he has a PHD in physics, his thesis being about rifts in space time and interdimensional interactions, however all of his papers are published under an alias. He has a soft spot for Deidara and refuses to fire him despite the latter's frequent "accidents".
Zetsu is a biological anthropologist fascinated by human evolution and human behavior. Some think even his colleagues are subjects of his studies. Some people say he's two-faced, but he is very chatty and inquisitive most of the time. He volunteered to have Itachi's venus fly traps in his office and can sometimes be seen feeding them dead flies or mosquitoes.
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