#Kaz and Inej are just laughing to each other in the corner

[undercover-grisha]

I like to believe that the Grishaverse doesn’t have homophobia (even tho that’s bs bc homophobia stems entirely from sexism and there’s CLEARLY that in the Grishaverse but WHATVEVER) however I like to believe that the Grishaverse doesn’t have homophobia… except Fjerda.

Because Matthias doesn’t know what to do when he sees Jesper kissing Wylan goodbye before leaving a room. Hmm. Maybe it’s a Zemeni thing. Well, alright, Matthias is all for trying new cultures.

so he kisses Wylan goodbye before leaving the room.

at the end of a very long week, Nina has to ask Jesper and Wylan if they are dating her boyfriend— because she can work around that if they are, and honestly she wouldn’t mind poly— and they just stare at her blankly.

“We just assumed that was a Fjerdan thing.”

[lady-ashfade]

Can you do a kazzle dazzle were kaz is like in love with reader while reader doesn't think so and all the crows tease him and stuff because its somewhat obvious to everyone but reader. And kaz like leaves her anonymous gifts. And then maybe a love confection at the end?

Sorry if your not taking requests

What gave me away?

Kaz brekker x Fem!Reader

I’ve seen so much like this and I just love it! I want kaz to gift me things.

Notes: Longest kaz fic of mine, like I haven’t wrote this much for one character in a while. You can be a crow in this, or just work at the club.

Warnings: Fluffy, cursing I think, teasing from the group, kaz being a little soft. Maybe some angst. Spelling mistakes.

His hooded eyes stared at her fingers as she washed to counter, moving them up he looks at her face. The face that he admired and couldn’t help but feel warm when he looked at her. She wear a dress, not too fancy or too boring. She worked the bar or help the kitchen at times, so she always got stains on her dress. She looked beautiful to him even now, messy dress and a little dirt on her cheek.

She had her lips pouted a bit and at whatever she was thinking about, he found it cute. He couldn’t help but do this often, he just feel in a trace. Kaz let his mind run to far that everyone there notice his absence mind. Smirking, Nina was the first to speak. “You got a bit of drool there, boss.” She leaned close and pointed to the corner of his lips but never touched him.

Kaz broke his trance and turned to her with a glare, “Excuse me?” She laughed and sat back into her boyfriend arms. “You’re partially ripping her clothes off in your mind. And not to mention your heart is acting weird, you wanna go talk to her?” She asked with a teasing small voice as if she was talking to a child.

He took a deep breath of annoyance and rolled his eyes. “She’s using the wrong rag, she should have switched it out a hour ago.” He stated to throw their thoughts off. Nina nodded but she didn’t believe it, no one at the table did. “I don’t know boss” Jesper tapped in, “You were giving her the eyes.” He moved his eyebrows.

“What eyes?” Kit had no clue what he was talking about. Jesper laughed and turned to wylan who already knew what to do. They stare at each other with big eyes and admiring their features, like a puppy. Nina giggled and hit the table, “He looks exactly like that!” Kaz groaned at their teasing, “Stop taking or you’re all out a job.” He grabbed his cane and stood up with it.

“No, boss don’t leave.” Jesper called out as they watch him leave, “Kazzel, we’re sorry.” Nina watched him leave. Once he disappeared they all looked at each other with big smirks. “He was totally drooling.” Jesper laughed. “Totally, now” she pulled out her coin purse. “Who wants to bet on them?” The table pitched in and were planning to get Inej in on it later.

//~//

His office was quiet and he could hear the sounds dying down as the club closed and the workers left, the only person left was you and the other crows. A knock at the door made his ears perk up, he knew who it was. “Come on.” His voice sounded light and low. You step through the door with a tray in your hand and carefully walked. “What have you brought this time?” He continued to write on the paper.

You smiled and walked over to him and set the tray on the table in the corner. “Well, get ready to eat a feast.” You giggle and picked up a big plate. He pushed his paper away, he learned that even if he wasn’t hungry you wouldn’t care. You placed the plate down in front of him and set down the  utensils he needed. “Cabbage rolls, with a small side of eggs. And my favorite, seasoned potatoes.”

He looked up at you, his eyes questioning you. “We didn’t serve these tonight.” You smiled and shrugged, “They just appeared out of no where.” You walked back over to the table to get the other things you brought him. “And you’d feed this to me not knowing if it was poison?” He grabbed the fork and poked the food, but he knew you had made it. “Maybe I want whatever you have stashed around here.”

He hummed and you came back over and set down a glass of water and a smaller plate, a sweet roll on top of it. He remembered when you found out he had a sweet tooth you always got him one, he hated someone knowing that. But if it was going to be anyone he was fine with it being you.

“You better drink the whole glass of water, and eat at least half of everything.” You dropped your eyelids and leaned on his decks. “If that’s all, leave me to it.” He looked back down. Your eyes glanced over a bit and your breath hitched. Nodding you picked up the tray and walked out of the room like he told you.

“You should stay, be with me for a while.” The words you always wished to hear spoke through your head in his voice. You knew kaz was closed off, he didn’t like to show anyone anything he didn’t have to. It was known that he cared about you and the crows…But you hoped he cared more, like you did him. Each night you glanced at him, when he would walk around the bar with a glare and looked like a angry dog. You hated yourself for falling for a man that couldn’t love you back.

The next day you walked through the alleyways as the fog still covered the streets, the sun coming up and the soft light shined. You did like the morning because the way you took, there was never many people. You got to hear the birds that nest around and you could hear yourself think. Entering the club you worked and smiled at the men that work the table set up, you went to the bar. As you got closer you noticed something on the table, a box wrapped in a ribbon that wasn’t there when you closed.

Curiosity got the better of you and you looked at the note attached to it and your eyes widen as you saw your name written. There was no other name or any hint as to who it could be. It could be some sort of bomb or a poisons animal, but sometimes you couldn’t let the wonders stay. So you took of the top of the box and saw a few cookie cutters and your heart stop as you pick one of them up. You remember them from the store you went by, you stayed about a hour just convincing yourself not to waste money.

You looked up to see if anyone was looking at you, if you could spot the person who gifted it but you saw no one. Smiling big you took the box and put it under the corner. Everyone noticed the whole day you were more happy and hopping around the place. Everyone was more alive to see you like that, and it made them feel happier. When Nina asked what you were so happy about, you told her about the gift. “Who got it for you.” She raised a cup to her mouth and then took a bite of her waffle. “No clue, it wasn’t signed.” She was stunned for a moment as you walked off. Then she remembered that your boss was aways interested in your smile, so she put the pieces together.

That was just the start of the weekly gifts that were on the counter when you entered the club. Sometimes it was a flower vase with your favorite flowers. Sometimes it was new baking equipment, others it was just small things you would look at in the market. Once your shoes broke at work and you had to finish the shift with no shoes. Then, a man came in with a new pair as the club closed and that was your final straw.

You needed to find the person. They always knew what you wanted or needed. At first you thought it would be Inej because she couldn’t be seen, but you asked her and she said no. You could tell when she was lying. You asked everyone and they all said no, but you never asked kaz. It wasn’t even on your mind but it you needed to cross every box off. So when you brought him his nightly meal you had the perfect opportunity to ask.

This time his sweet was a cookie in the shape of one of the cutters he had got you. He lightly smiled with his eyes because you had used it. “Kaz.” You set down the glass on his desk. He glanced at you and then back down for you to get the words out. You tried to control the sweat coming off your body and your heart from beating fast.

“I’ve been getting these gifts, and I have no idea who they are from.” He nodded his head and picked up some food with his fork. “And are they threatening?” You shook your head and bit your lips. “No, they are sweet actually. Who ever is sending them is actually paying attention to me.” You fumbled your hands.

“Is that all you wanted to say? Why tell me this?” He sound annoyed. “Because I wanted to know if..” you stoped and looked at him. He let a few seconds pass by and looked up at you as you went silent and frozen. “If?” He asked to get you to keep going.

You needed to just bite the bullet and ask him. Part of you wanted it to be him- No. All of you wanted it to be him. To know that he pays attention to you, noticing everything like you do him. “Are you sending them?” You let out a breath. He stopped for a minute and looked into your eyes, you noticed his lips slowly curl up into a smirk.

“What gave me away?”

That wasn’t what you thought you would hear. And you actually thought you imagined it for a minute. It made your mind fly with thoughts and it took you so much by surprise, you stop working for a moment. “So, it was you?” Your brows raised themselves but crunched, he loved that look. “Hmm, but I should have guessed you would have figured me out.”

It clinked into your brain, it made your stomach fill with butterflies and heart flatter. “So, why did you do it?” You smiled at him. “I like to see you smile. I needed to show you thatI think about you non stop but, i couldn’t say it to your face.” He was truthful. “I-” he took a deep breath and raised his hand slowly and put it above yours. You he had a problem with touch, and that he was working on it.

Before you could voice your opinion he place his hand on top of your softly, it fit over yours perfectly. It was warm and the leather felt nice. “I have these feelings for you, that I don’t know what to do with. But, I’d like to have you as mine.” You smiled wide and tried not to cry, so you giggled at the overwhelming feeling.

“I will be yours, Kaz Brekker.” He actually smiled for the first time, not a small one but a bigger one. You could tell he was trying for you and you couldn’t help but find it adorable, but you couldn’t voice it. “Now, eat up and I’ll be back in a few. I want you to tell me that again.” You pranced out his office like you owned the place and acted high and mighty.

He sighed and chuckled, shaking his head at how much you affected him. The only warmth he felt inside was thinking of you, or seeing you.

“I’ll be yours kaz brekker.” He would replay those words in his head until his last breath.

[sophierequests]

Hi! If I can't describe how much I love ur writing and how talented you are but may I request something? The reader is the definition of 'sweetheart' and they're from Ravka and misses home and even if they don't want to leave Kaz side, he still sends them to travel with Inej (even if it painful for him) and after staying there for a while they one day surprise him at his office and Kaz is just so happy. You don't have to write it by the way, take your time and take care<3 thank you

right where you left me

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Pairing: Kaz Brekker x gn!Reader

A/N: Aww, thank you so much <3 That's so sweet! I hope you like this too :D I procratinated a bit and had the draft sitting in my Google Docs for quite some time, but I finally had enough time/motivation to get it done. Also, my exam phase has started, so content in general may come out a little bit slower <3

Summary: Kaz sends the reader off to go travel with Inej, but didn't expect him missing them this much.

Genre: Hurt/Comfort elements, but mainly Fluff (???)

Word Count: 6.1K

Warnings: Poor (barely any) proofreading, mention of drinking and being drunk, forgetting to eat

“Inej!” you squealed as the familiar frame of your friend slipped into the living room. A wide smile graced her vibrant face as she opened her arms to engulf you in a tight hug. It had been roughly four months since she last docked in Ketterdam, so you were barely able to contain your excitement of finally seeing her again. 

“Missed me?” she laughed as she pulled away, letting her gaze wander from you to an almost contended-looking Kaz. The rare sight of a genuine smirk tugged at the corners of his lips, accompanied by something dangerously close to a blush while he purposefully avoided her knowing glances. He looked like a besotted teenage boy, and it was hard not to notice.

Of course Inej knew the cause of this. She had known both of you long enough to be painfully aware of the effect you had on him; the effect you had on each other. You were intoxicating, a brief smile or laugh made him stumble even deeper into his dependency on you. And how could he not? You were the sun personified; warm and gentle and far too kind. He had told her once that he considered letting you go; you were all too good for the Barrel, and he couldn’t allow it to swallow you whole - the same as it had him. But it was clear that he’d never bring himself to do so. It was an act of complete selfishness to keep you here. He needed you to be around. He needed to know that you were around. The thought of you being out of his reach - albeit mainly metaphorically - unsettled him.

“They dragged me out of my office in the middle of a heist plan to sit here and wait for you to arrive. I suppose ‘missing you’ doesn’t quite cut it,” Kaz commented dryly, rolling his shoulders in a futile attempt to regain his composure.

“You were closer to falling asleep at your desk than getting anywhere with that damned heist planning, Brekker. Don’t act like you didn’t appreciate me forcing you to take care of yourself every once in a while.” His mouth opened for a split second, another one of his sarcastic comments starting to form on the tip of his tongue. He quickly swallowed it after Inej gave him an endearing grin.

You had intended to say something else in response to Kaz’s unusual silence to your light-hearted jabs, but suddenly, you remembered a conversation you had a few days prior. “Oh! Do you mind if I leave you two alone for a bit? I promised Jes to notify him the second you arrive.” You leaned a bit closer toward Inej, acting as if you were about to tell her something no one else was allowed to hear. “I think it’s about his plan to propose to Wylan soon, but you don’t know that from me. He thinks he’s being sly, but he really isn’t.”

Inej laughed, shaking her head before sending you off with a faint slap to the shoulder. You were out of the room before Kaz could put in his two cents.

When they heard the resounding click of the main door being shut, they knew that they were truly alone now. Anyone else would have been uneasy at the thought of being in the same room with the Bastard of the Barrel without having some other sort of company. But in this light, even the infamous Dirtyhands was nothing more but a lovesick boy, fully at the mercy of a person that held his heart in an undeniably firm grasp. 

“How long can we expect you to stay in Ketterdam?” He knew exactly what she would ask him if he hadn’t started the conversation first, so he did everything in his power to keep her from speaking his feelings into reality.

She sauntered over to the table, taking the seat across from him with an exaggerated sigh. “Two weeks.” Her hands were idly clasped together in front of her, making it appear like she was trying to strike up a business deal instead of having an amicable chat with an old friend. "How long can we expect you to wait until you finally confess to them?” 

Her bluntness definitely startled him more than he cared to admit. It wasn’t every day that someone dared to talk to him like that. “I don’t see how this topic has any relevance in our current conversation,” he mumbled, averting his gaze to look basically anywhere else but her eyes.

“If you say so,” she snorted, still opting to not create any unwanted tension on her first day of being back.

“Where will you be headed after these two weeks?”

A sheepish smile crept onto her face as she contemplated his question. “I received news from Sturmhond that would like to have a chat about the recent slaver fleets I… took care of. We’ll be docking in Os Kervo for quite some time. I’ll probably also meet up with Nina after she’s back from Fjerda. I haven't seen her in so long.”

“Ravka…” he sighed, his thoughts involuntarily landing back on you again.

Even though he couldn’t find much beauty in the vast Ravkan countryside and its ill-constructed cities or palaces, he knew that you missed your home dearly. You had been homesick ever since he had offered you to work with the Crows long-term, and he began to feel bad for rarely ever acknowledging it. At first, he had expected you to get over it eventually, but the more time he spent with you, the more he was assured that this wouldn’t be the case. Hypothetically, he could offer you to take a few weeks off to see your home and family. He’d need to find an appropriate excuse to let you go this easily, but lying had never been a weakness of his. However, this idea would also entail not seeing you for at least a handful of weeks, and he couldn’t do that. He didn’t want to do that.

“Y/N is going to be so happy to hear that I’ll be staying there for a bit. I promised them to check in on their family if I ever got the chance to go to Ravka,” Inej smiled woefully, knowing that merely hearing about your parents would probably already make you miss them more. “They gave me some letters for them when I last left Ketterdam. Now I finally have the chance to giv-”

“How much additional trouble would it be to take someone else with you?” Kaz interjected suddenly, schooling his expression in order to not betray the apprehension lingering behind his eyes.

“What?” 

“Has the air pressure at sea made you go deaf? How much trouble would it be to have an unplanned passenger with you? At least until you arrive in Os Alta. Well, and preferably also on your way back.” 

The hesitant, but defensive, tone in his voice told Inej everything she needed to know, but she still decided to entertain his implied suggestion. “It wouldn’t be any trouble. Well, depending on whom this 'unplanned passenger' might be."

“Good.” He paused, internally questioning whether this decision would be the right one to make. It was clear that it was what he needed to do, but he wasn't sure if he had the strength to go through with it. "Then I'd like to make a request, Captain Ghafa."

"You request I take Y/N with me when I leave for Ravka." He mentally shooed away the frown that threatened to crease his face. She was right, that was exactly what he wanted to ask her. But hearing her say the words out loud forced the vague idea to manifest into reality. And knowing that she could read him this easily deflated his ego quite a bit.

"Yes. I want you to take them with you. Let them see something else than the Barrel. Let them go home to their family. And…" And bring them back home, back to me, his mind finished.

Inej tilted her head to the side ever so slightly, biting away the impulse of asking him to continue his sentence. Instead, she opted to ask something different, “Are you sure?”

“Sure of what? Letting them go with you? I’m certain they’ll be able to handle themself just fine. If you thi-”

“Are you sure that you’re okay with letting them go?” His fingers flexed around his cup, visibly trying to hide the concern this comment had installed in him.

“It’s not like I’m letting them go forever, Inej,” he retorted, his voice sounding terribly unsure. “I trust you to bring them back safely on your next journey to Ketterdam.”

“That’s not what I meant, Kaz. Don’t act dense.” She was testing his limits and she knew it, yet she still continued. “We’ll be gone for multiple months. They’ll be gone for multiple months. And, as much as I hate to say it, there’s still the possibility of them choosing to stay with their family. Are you sure you’re okay with that?”

He hadn’t thought of her last point. Would you really consider not coming back to Ketterdam? Deep down he knew that there was nothing that kept you here. The Crows weren’t a set team anymore, you’d probably have no issues finding a new job in Ravka, and it wasn’t like he and you were in a relationship. If you wanted to leave, you could pack up tomorrow without having to worry about anything else but your next pay cheque. And knowing Kaz, you likely wouldn’t even have to worry about that either.

“I could give them a year off if that would be needed. I can take care of myself just fine, no matter whether they are here or not,” Kaz evaded the actual meaning of Inej’s words with much more clumsiness than he had hoped to convey. “And as long as they’re still working with me, I’ll at least expect them to come back to break off their contract.”

“Very well then. I suppose the Wraith has an additional passenger when we next leave the harbour.” She gave him a tight nod as a sort of confirmation. An unsaid promise to keep you safe. “You’ll be the one to tell them though. I’m not willing - nor able - to explain how deep your soft spot for them actually goes.”

“I do not have a soft spot for them.”

“You do not have a soft spot for whom?” Jesper’s overly cheery voice appeared at the threshold of the door, his breath ragged and cheeks flushed by the torturous climb up the stairs.

“No one,” Kaz and Inej answered almost synchronously, earning a slightly befuddled scowl from the antsy sharpshooter.

“Alright, alright, I was just asking.” He held up his hands defensively, dropping them as soon as you squeezed past him. Thankfully, you arrived just in time to miss their little squabble. “Anyway, look who’s back!” His attention flickered completely towards Inej, immediately moving towards her to trap her in his ramblings. 

Kaz took that as his cue to leave them to it. “Y/N? I have something to talk to you about. Follow me.” He didn’t wait for you to give him a vocal response, turning on his heel to take the last few stairs up to his office. Nevertheless, reluctant footsteps echoed behind him as he entered his tidy office space.

Wordlessly, he sat down behind his desk, gesturing for you to take the seat across from him. Suddenly, everything felt uncomfortably stiff. It wasn’t at all like sitting at the living room table and talking to you just for the sake of it. But this was business after all, he thought begrudgingly.

“What is it you wanted to talk to me about?” you inquired slowly, accepting the offered seat with one leg tucked underneath you. He could sense the fear you emitted and it made him wonder what you were expecting him to say.

“Inej will leave for Ravka in two weeks,” he stated matter-of-factly. He needed to flush this out of his system as emotionless as possible, or else he might not be able to watch you go. A clean cut heals faster. “I want you to go with her.” It was foolish to hope that you would have no follow-up questions to a remark this sudden.

“You want me to leave?” You straightened your back, eyes wide and brows furrowed. His point clearly flew right over your head.

“No, I mean, yes.” The grave he was beginning to dig for himself looked more comfortable than genuinely having to finish this conversation. “I want you to go with her so that you can see your family. She already ensured that it would be no problem to take you with her, in case you worry about what she thinks about it.”

“My family? Why? I don’t understand?” Unease began to seep through you. Did something happen? Did he know something you didn’t? 

He heaved a sigh, making a steeple of his fingers, a futile attempt to keep his hands in order. “You’ve been distracted lately.” He held up his hand to dismiss your incoming attempt at defending yourself. “And I don’t blame you; you’re homesick. I can’t force you to stay here, and if you miss your home, I can only advise you to take the trip.”

“Kaz, I can’t possibly leave for what could end up being months. This is still my job,” you had to stifle a chuckle, thinking that all of this was some sort of tasteless joke.

“And I’m still your boss. Hence why I am free to give you as much time off as you need to reconnect with your family." Even if it ends up in you choosing to leave permanently. 

“Why would you do that?” You couldn’t quite grasp his reasons. As far as you knew, your performance hadn’t decreased, you weren’t to blame for a job failing, and you didn’t give him any reason to doubt your usefulness. There had to be something more to it.

“A distracted Crow is a dead one.” And I don’t want to lose you like this. “A bit of time away from the Barrel would do you some good. I expect you to be well-rested and fully functional once you return.” I want you to be happy when you return. If you choose to do so.

You stared at him for a bit longer, unable to form any coherent sentence that wouldn’t make you want to start crying. There was a foreign roundness to his words; something almost akin to kindness. He had never been cruel to you, but an offer this grand exceeded your expectations.

“Thank you,” you managed to force out without having your voice shiver or quake. “I mean it, Kaz. Thank you.” He had half-expected you to stand up and go back downstairs after agreeing to his offer. However, you stayed seated, a glint of hesitation pooling in your eyes. “Are you sure you’re okay with me leaving? I really don’t want to give you more work by be-”

“Y/N,” he warned, resisting the urge to chide you for your distrust in his decision-making. “I want you to take this time off. It’s fine. I’m not bargaining for what I can’t handle.”

“I just wanted to make sure.” Your previously perplexed expression was replaced by a playful grin, indicating that the majority of your doubts had ebbed away by now. “Just in case I have to brace myself for a mountain of letters begging me to come back.”

“In your dreams.”

Both Kaz and you were quite startled by how quickly the two weeks trickled by. Inej stayed at the Slat during her time in Ketterdam, spending her days joining you on heists, playing the engagement planner for Jesper and Wylan, and just barely surviving all that unresolved romantic tension between you and Kaz.

The evening before you were supposed to leave, Wylan and Jesper invited you to some sort of farewell party for you and Inej. It was terribly cheesy, especially since everyone’s favourite sharpshooter decided to amp up his theatrics to the max. You occasionally had to remind him that you were not leaving forever and that you’d most definitely be back in a few months. 

When you returned to your own room, the only thing you wanted to do was sleep. It had been a long day spent packing and finishing the few last tasks that Kaz had given you. The anticipation of being only mere days away from seeing your family again had ebbed away, replaced by exhaustion and worry. Not the worry of going back to Ravka; it was the worry of leaving Kaz behind without anyone to take care of him. It was a foolish fear, the man was old enough to survive a few months of being left alone. And in reality, he wouldn’t be alone. Jesper and Wylan would still be right around the corner in case he needed anything. But you knew that it wouldn’t be the same without you. And he knew it too.

Before you could finally crawl into the comfort of your bed, you were forced to pause. Right in the dead centre of your mattress laid something shiny, haphazardly covered by a folded piece of parchment. You were hesitant to touch it at first, mentally assessing the possibility of it being a trap. However, your curiosity overtook your cautious stance. 

You swatted the paper to the side, revealing a stunning dagger you didn’t recognise. The black handle was covered in intricate lines and symbols, making the whole weapon a piece of art in its own right. You pulled the dagger out of its shaft, revealing a slim, double-edged blade that looked almost too delicate to cause any serious harm. 

After putting the knife down next to you, you picked up the piece of paper, carefully unfolding it in hopes of finding out who might’ve left it there. You didn’t even need to read the few scribbled words to get an answer to that. 

“While I do believe that you’ll be fine on your own, consider this an added layer of safety.

Safe travels,

K.B.”

It felt unreal. The same man that didn’t shrink away from ripping somebody else’s eyes out or bashing another person’s head in with his cane was now willing to send you off to your home country and gift you a pretty little dagger under the ruse of wanting you to be able to defend yourself. It made you giddy. 

Quickly, you shoved the knife into one of the side pockets of your bag, folding the note and tucking it away into the front pockets of your coat. He would probably sneer at you for holding onto something as worthless as a hastily written note, but to you, this meant the world.

On the day of your departure, the sky was thickly covered by a widespread sheet of dark storm clouds, announcing the approach of an upcoming storm. Perfect weather to embark on a ship for a week-long trip, you thought. You had packed everything you might need into the biggest bag you owned, which hung heavily on your shoulder as you approached the harbour. Inej’s small and compact travel bag next to yours made it seem like you were trying to abandon Ketterdam at once, rather than simply taking a short vacation to see your parents.

Much to Inej’s dismay, Kaz had decided to stay in his office, using the excuse of ‘having too much work’ and ‘not being able to indulge in matters this minuscule’. She could only scoff at that response but decided to not engage in his self-loathing musings. Her main focus was on getting you accustomed to her crew and the life on deck, so she couldn’t waste too much time thinking about a brooding emotionally stunted teenager.

You weren’t all that bothered by the fact that he stayed back. What Inej didn’t know was that he did say goodbye to you. Just in a very Kaz way. 

“So, Captain Ghafa,” you smiled, putting a lot of emphasis on her title. “Where’s our first stop?”

The loneliness was terrible. It shouldn’t be terrible. He had been alone all those years before you showed up and managed just fine. Why did he let it bother him so much now? 

But you didn’t know them all those years ago. You didn’t know what their absence felt like, so how could you have missed it? The nagging voice inside his head ridiculed him constantly. And the worst part was, that it was completely right.

He let his bare hand rake through his unruly hair, dropping it onto the table quite harshly as he began running out of things to put his focus on. Everything he did or thought of somehow circled back to you. Whenever he sat down at his desk to work, he imagined you sitting on the sofa across from him, skipping through one of his books while occasionally looking up at him with a bright smile on your lips. He couldn’t even eat breakfast in peace, because every time he entered the kitchen and the smell of freshly brewed coffee entered his nose, he wanted you to be the one sitting at the table, already having his cup sitting across from you. Three weeks was all that it took to make him regret all of the well-intentioned decisions he made in the spur of the moment.

Since rearranging the documents in front of him didn’t give him any sort of distraction, he decided to occupy his mind with something different. Well, a different stack of work: the upkeep of the Crow Club.

The club wasn’t busy during this time of the day, mainly filled with the usual day drinkers and gamblers that would waste their money until the early hours of the next morning. He let his gaze wander over the few occupied gambling tables and booths, taking in all the familiar and unfamiliar faces before weaving his way through the room. When he passed the bar, he had to do a double take to confirm that the person currently chatting up the bartender wasn’t you. He stopped dead in his tracks, unable to pry his eyes away from the scene in front of him.

That was until he heard his name being called, instantly snapping him out of his stupor. Jesper and Wylan sat only a few barstools away from him, amusedly waving him over to join them in whatever senseless discussion they had currently going on. Against his better judgement, he strolled over to them. He was in desperate need of a distraction. Any type of distraction.

“How close to insanity are you?” Maybe not that type of distraction.

“I’m sure I don’t know what you mean, Jesper,” Kaz warned, leaning his back against the counter and closing his eyes. 

The two boys exchanged a knowing smile, fully intending on using this situation to annoy their friend. Jesper loosened his grip on the full shot glass, smoothly sliding it over to Kaz. Maybe a little bit of alcohol could remove the stick up his ass. “Their absence has taken a toll on you, hasn’t it?”

Kaz grunted in dismay, picking up the shot glass and downing it in one swift motion. A muscle in his jaw popped as he clenched his jaw, wallowing in the usually welcome feeling of sharp bitter alcohol running down his throat. Now, drinking just felt like a cheap means to an end. 

But at least it was a mean to an end. Without thinking about it, he ordered more alcohol.

“Y’know, they would definitely tell you off for drinking this early,” Wylan chuckled, immediately regretting it after seeing the disgruntled glare Kaz passed him. 

“Their opinion doesn’t concern me. I have other, more important, things to take into consideration.” He tried so hard to be convincing, however, Jesper’s excruciatingly loud snort told him that that ship had sailed, wrecked and sunk to the bottom of the True Sea in a matter of seconds. 

“For a man that lies for a living, you’re quite shit at it,” the sharpshooter chuckled, shaking his head disapprovingly while Kaz continued to sulk. It was honestly painful to watch. “Admit it, you miss them.”

“Whatever armchair psychology you’re currently trying to submit me to is not working. I don’t have any deeper feelings for them than I have for the other people that work with me, so watch your tone.” The bartender placed a fresh glass of whiskey next to him, setting it down quite loudly to get him to register it. Kaz didn’t even spare him one look before putting the whole thing to his lips. He hoped that occupying himself with something other than talking would stop him from vocalising his honest thoughts.

“No one ever implied that you had feelings for them. But how telling that that’s the first thing you get so defensive about.” Jesper gave him a shameless grin, knowing that he had most definitely won the unspoken argument between them. “And, just so you know, whatever it is you’re feeling, they’re very likely to reciprocate it.” He flashed him a playful wink when he finished talking. It was the best kind of pep-talk he could offer, and it probably fell on deaf ears anyway.

“Don’t you have literally anything else to do? Anything that does not involve getting on my last nerve,” Kaz grumbled, finishing his drink and attempting to push himself away from the counter. However, when he tried to do so, he suddenly felt very light-headed, his body almost beginning to topple forward. His hand moved to cling to the edge of the counter, steadying himself almost desperately. The alcohol must have gotten to his head way quicker than expected. 

“Woah, hold on there!” Jesper slid off his stool, holding his arms out in front of his friend to cushion the expected fall. “Are you okay, Kaz?”

“Are you drunk?” Wylan added with a bit too much delight in his voice. 

“Nonsense, I barely had anything to drink,” he tried to defend himself, futilely.

“What did you have for breakfast then?” 

Breakfast. He didn’t have breakfast. He didn’t have breakfast since you left. Normally, you would have made sure to drag him down to the kitchen if need be. Without you, he simply forgot. If you’d get wind of this, you’d probably have a field day.

Inej had told him that it could take months for you to come back. She had explicitly warned him about the prospect of not seeing you for quite some time. Yet somehow, he hadn’t expected it to be genuinely true. 

Your departure was six long and torturous months ago, and his mind was running wild whenever an unknown ship docked at Fifth Harbour. Time passed, and it didn’t - it won’t - stop, no matter how hard he tried.

He had even attempted to contact Inej once in the hopes of getting a rough estimate of when he could expect you to return, but of course, the message was promptly returned to the sender. At this point, he wasn’t certain whether he’d ever get to see you again; the mere thought of you deciding to stay in Ravka pained him, but there was still a small twinge of hope, tying him to the idea of you coming back to him.

Another day without you passed, and Kaz had decided - well, Jesper forced him - to get out of his office, dragging him down to the club and into one of the booths to waste the evening drinking and exchanging stories. It was a small distraction from the constant anxiety rushing through him, but it was appreciated nonetheless. 

Until a very unbothered Rotty stalked towards their table, acting as if he was a misbehaving schoolboy that had been sent up to the headmaster’s office. “We have news from the Wraith,” he muttered, retrieving a folded note from the front pocket of his coat. The words made Kaz’s head spin, but the solemn look on Rotty’s face made him pause. 

Hesitantly, he took the piece of paper from his hands, waiting for the messenger to leave before he opened it. Jesper and Wylan stopped their chatter, almost holding their breaths in anticipation while they watched every micro-expression that washed over their friend’s face.

Kaz sighed when he took in the words in front of him. Even though he hadn’t expected anything, he still felt disappointed in what he got. The entire note was just an utterly impersonal notice, telling him that it would take her at least three more months to return to Ketterdam. There was no mention of your well-being or whereabouts, no note on how to contact you, nothing. 

“And? When will you be reunited with your- ow! Wylan, what was that for?” 

“Just shut it, Jes!” 

“They won’t be back for at least another three months,” he let out a huffed breath, tucking the piece of paper away in his breast pocket. Dismay was written all over his face as he stared down at this glass, unable to form a coherent thought that was not somewhat related to you.

Everyone knew the thoughts that clouded Kaz’s mind; mainly thoughts of you not coming back. Jesper wanted to say something encouraging, but the words died in his throat as soon as they formed. Instead, he quickly decided to change the topic, rambling on about some unimportant Ketterdam gossip Kaz wasn’t all that interested in. He still sat through it though.

On his way back to the Slat, he thought about all the work that would be waiting for him once he reached his office. Any other sensible person would have gone to bed by now, but he was far from being one, so sleeping was not an option. 

He trudged up the creaky staircase with heavy steps, alerting everyone unfortunate enough to be awake of his presence. His bad leg felt like an anchor that kept pulling him down to the ground, his hand occasionally having to press down on a sore spot when the pain got too unbearable.

It took him way longer than usual to reach the top of the stairs, heaving a harsh sigh when he saw the faint flicker of a light fanning out from underneath his office door. He couldn’t even be trusted to turn off his damned lamps now, could he?

As he went to unlock the door, another buzz of confusion surged through him. The door had already been unlocked. That couldn’t be. He could have sworn that he locked it before leaving for the club. Had he imagined that too? Was he genuinely starting to become insane?

Pushing these unwelcome thoughts to the side, he swiftly opened the door. All of this could be chalked up to him being tired and a bit distracted. He didn’t particularly like any of these ideas, but he needed something to blame his recent behaviour on. 

The room was faintly illuminated by the sparse light emitting from the oil lamp at the edge of his desk. It gave him the perfect view of the stack of unfinished paperwork, he chuckled internally. He limped over to his desk and let himself fall into his chair. Only now the real weight of the day hit him, a fully-loaded freight train running him over with full force. Saints, he was so tired. Resting his head in his hands, he let the silence of his office swallow him whole.

“Are you choosing to ignore me or did you really not notice me sitting here?” He jerked backwards, both hands holding on to the armrests of his chair in preparation to fight off whoever had the nerve to enter his office without his knowledge. His eyes were darting around the room wildly, latching on to every shadowed shape and figure that did as much as sway in the wind. 

A shape in the corner of his room stood up, stepping a bit closer to the desk and into the glow of his lamp. It was you. You looked just like you had left him; vibrant, glowing, and warm. Maybe it was his mind playing tricks on him; maybe he just wanted it to be you. It all felt like a sick joke to him. You couldn’t be here. He would have known if that had been the case. He would have been the first to know.

“Kaz?” Your voice rang in his ears. Loud and clear. If this was an illusion, it was a damn convincing one. 

“Stop it,” he tried shooing the apparition away, waving a dismissive hand as he slowly began to put his focus on the work in front of him. Much to his surprise, you didn’t just disappear into thin air. You gave him an incredulous grin, accentuated by a ridiculing snort.

“I was expecting you to be a bit happier to see me again,” you fake-pouted, using your best Jesper impression to convey your theatrical hurt. 

This had to be real. As much as his mind may despise him, it couldn’t create images this livid; this real; this true. When the realisation struck him, he wasn’t quite sure what to do. His heart beat as if it was running a marathon, and he couldn’t help but feel dizzy. Not the kind of dizziness he felt after drinking on an empty stomach. Rather the kind of dizziness that makes your head spin and heart ache because you have no other way to deal with the immense array of feelings bubbling inside his chest. He didn’t recall the last time he felt like this.

After a period of silence that could have just as well lasted hours, he finally caught himself again. “You’re here,” he mumbled, still having trouble with coming to terms with the situation.

“Of course I am. Did you really think that I was going to never show up again? No faith, Brekker.” You smiled then, sitting on the edge of his desk to get a closer look at him. He looked exhausted, the eyebags under his eyes raising a stark contrast against his almost pallid skin. 

He sucked in a harsh breath, allowing his eyes to roam over his features for what felt like the hundredth time in the last few minutes. The smile that you were giving him made him feel uncharacteristically giddy, but for once in a while, it wasn’t a feeling he wanted to gag and lock away in the deepest depths of his conscience. For the first time in forever, he felt happy.

“I never doubted that you’d come back.” A lie of convenience, but you didn’t need to know that. “It’s just that Inej sent a message-”

“That she won’t be back in Ketterdam for at least another three months. I know.” You completed his sentence effortlessly, your hands mindlessly playing with one of his fountain pens. “Whatever she discussed with Sturmhond seems to be important enough to take a trip to Novyi Zem before she’d be able to set sail to Ketterdam.” You bit your lip in thought, contemplating what you were about to say next. “I didn’t feel like staying back for that long, so I took matters into my own hands and bought a ticket for the next best ship leaving for Kerch. It was great seeing my family again, but I missed the Dregs - as stupid as it sounds.”

Kaz chuckled, your words having an almost intoxicating effect on him. “Be assured that the Dregs missed you too.”

“Just the Dregs?” 

He hesitated. He’d been dying to see you again; to tell you the truth. Yet now, things felt way too real, pressing down on his ribcage with a force he couldn’t quite comprehend. He couldn’t hesitate forever though. “No, not just the Dregs.” Another pause, brief but intense. “I missed you too. Almost enough to send you a letter requesting you to come back.”

“And here I thought you gifting me a pretty dagger was the height of romance,” you laughed, watching in delight as his gaze flickered to the shiny weapon tightly strapped to your belt. He hadn’t thought about checking whether you had taken it with you, or whether you had just chalked it up to being a weird act of possessiveness. But seeing you wear it this openly ripped all the doubts away from his mind. “And, just for the record,” your hands flew to the breast pocket of your coat, carefully retrieving the familiar piece of paper he had added to the knife. “I missed you too.”

Taglist:

Grishaverse fics in general: @yesshewrites1 @dal-light

Kaz Brekker: @ell0ra-br3kk3r @juneberrie @writingmysanity @b3kk3r-by-br3kk3r @brekkers-desigirl @fall-writes @lastwandastan @etanordoesbullsh1t

[ell0ra-br3kk3r-writes]

The Phoenix and the Crow

part eleven

pairing: (hinted) kaz brekker x fem!reader

genre: netural

el's thoughts: this was the hardest part to write... and the shortest haha but it's here and done so there ya go. please remember to comment and reblog :)

masterlist

The wind made Y/N’s hair dance wildly around her as she leaned her hip against the side of the ship. She had heard all about the uprising privateer’s flying ship but had never got the chance to be abroad. Her eyes closed as she relaxed at the feeling of the cold wind around her. She felt free and untethered while in the air, the same feeling she had felt the first time she rode her horse across the palace grounds. 

She circled around to look across the deck of the ship, mentally doing a head count of everyone on board. Nina stood beside Inej listening to whatever the suli spoke of with much interest. Jesper and Wylan were glued to each other's sides while they looked out at the water, pointing every once in a while to a fish they saw. Toyla stood at the wheel while Zoya paced the quarter-deck before waving her hands every so often to push the ship a bit faster. Kaz sat on the steps up to the quarter-deck with his leg stretched out in front of him, they made eye contact for a moment before Y/N smiled gently and looked away.

“Catch me!” The small voice was heard over the strong autumn winds that blew around them as the young child threw themselves into Y/N’s arms. She laughed and spun her brother around the best a ten-year-old could do to a six-year-old. 

“Oooh a stowaway on my ship?” She bounced him onto her hip to keep him up. He shook his head fervently as peels of laughter fell from his small pink lips. “You know what I do to stowaways?” She spoke in a loud voice making it deeper to fit the character she acted out. The little boy laughed louder, “No! No! Please!” 

“I’m sorry, young man, but it must be done!” She giggled as she tossed him into the giant pile of leaves their father gathered that morning. They both laughed louder as she threw herself down next to him.

The familiar clicking of a cane sounded from behind her and dragged her out of her memory. She didn’t need to turn around to feel him stand behind her. 

“You look better.” His voice was clipped but still seemed kind. Kind enough when coming from the bastard of the barrel that is. 

She scoffed, “What did I look bad before?”

Kaz shrugged, and the corner of his lips quirked upward. “You look healthy.”

She turned bashful now knowing the fact that he noticed her lack of strength the last few days. “I feel better… Must’ve been the hallucination, honestly.” 

“What did your toxin trip reveal to you?” He leaned closer on his cane, hardly noticeable but her sharp eyes caught it—the curiosity in his eyes. The same tiny spark of hope that she felt in her chest reflected in his eyes. But before she could give in and tell him what she saw in the hallucinations the Darkling’s voice echoed in her mind again. And instead of sharing and being open, taking the same step he did, the words that tumbled out of her mouth were the words that had been repeated to her all throughout her years at the Little Palace. 

“Hope is dangerous. Clouds your judgment.”

She didn’t tell him what she saw, how could she? She hardly knows this man despite the fact that her brain thought otherwise. She knows more about him than he knows of her. She’s pieced together some of his past and her heart ached for him. Life wasn’t fair and it was obvious in both of their lives. 

Y/N turned to look up at him as he leaned on the railing beside her. The need to tell him had come back and only grew stronger when she noticed the same curiosity across his face. “The Darkling. That’s who I saw.” It wouldn’t hurt to share some of it. “Reminding me of everything I could never have despite my childish wishes and dreams.” 

“From where we stood it looked like he reminded you just how powerful you are as well.”

She shook her head, “He reminded me of the monster he made me.”

“The Phoenix is hardly viewed as a monster. From what I’ve heard you’re just as much a Saint as the sun summoner. The most powerful inferni to walk the earth.” Kaz didn’t look at her as he spoke, only kept his eyes trained on the sea below them, his voice was almost teasing.

“Yeah, but I don’t want to be known as powerful because of my gift or- or because of the Darkling, or because of fear. I… I want to be powerful because I moved forward despite the odds. If people were to fear me, I want them to fear the name I built for myself.” She squeezed the rail under her hand. “I envy you for that reason… if I were to speak honestly.”

This caused him to look down at her, confusion swam in his eyes.

“You created a name for yourself, a name that brings people to their knees.” The pair smirked at the memory of the Dime Lions’ gambling den. “Literally.” 

A warm feeling grew in Y/N’s chest at the easiness of the conversation. There was nothing strange or awkward about talking to him, she felt like she could tell him anything even though she knew it was best not to. She wondered if he felt the same ease of the conversation or if it was all just in her head, but from the look in his eyes and his relaxed shoulders, it was safe to assume he felt it. 

“It’s fake.” A dark look flashed over Kaz’s face as the words fell from his lips. “My name, it’s fake.”

Y/N only nodded, moving so her back was against the handrail. “Kaz is a fake name?”

“Brekker.” His eyes met her’s for a moment before looking away. “Brekker is a fake name.”

She hummed, “We all do things for reasons only we know.” Twisting her fingers around each other, she sighed. “There are plenty of things I’ve done that if I had taken the time to actually think it through… I wouldn’t have made those choices, but in the end I’m standing here today and I wouldn’t be if I hadn’t made thoes choices. So, I wouldn’t change anything.”

“I wouldn’t-” Kaz was interrupted by Toyla shouting that they made it. Inej, Nina and Zoya all walked to one side, waiting for Y/N. 

The inferni gave Kaz a tight smile, “Well, I’m off.” She pulled her shoulders back as she walked to where the other girls stood waiting. 

Kaz watched in astonishment as the girl with whom he had just carried an intimate conversation with slipped back into the formal behavior that came with being a soldier. It was as if she had put back on a stoic and formal front, slipping back into her all too familiar mask. It was as if Y/N had only allowed herself a short break from such a pretense for those few private moments with him.

~*~*~*~

taglist:@rachelcarroll1819 @xcharlottemikaelsonx @khaleesihavilliard @simrah1012 @foulkryptonitepeanut @astridyoo15 @queenofshinigamis @peakyispunk @jahayla-parker @maliciousbrekker @brekkershadowsinger @winstonthecow22 @lee-says-things @bunneex @writingmysanity @sleepynightchild @madnessinwrighting @romanticvampire

[lunarthecorvus]

My Kanej headcanon

Kanej and a dance

Part 1 to the headcanon here remember this is not a fic just a headcanon/ word vomit

Some context: Kanej have come out to the public as a couple at this point (another hc). This is set 1 year to 2 years after CK. The merchers know that Wylan + Jesper are friends with Kaz + Inej.

They arrive at the event with Wylan and Jesper, theres tons of high power figures, merchers, and the council. As soon as people realise Kaz and Inej have arrived, everyone's stares at them and then immediately turn their heads afraid of the wraith captain and dirtyhands wrath.

Inej links arms with Kaz, and she drags him to a quiet corner in the room away from people. She whispers to him that if they see someone that's a known part of the skin trade, it wouldn't be the most tragic thing of they lost a jewel or two. Inej walks off to go talk to Wylan and Jesper and Kaz thinks saints I love that woman

Inej finds Kaz sat in a chair, observing the people with what could possibly be a scheming face. She walks up to him and offers him her hand, and asks him to dance. Kaz thinks about saying know but then remembers what she said to him back at the Slat and answers yes.

They make it to the dance floor, but when the music starts, they realise that people are staring at them. Kaz feels Inej start to shake and whispers to her to follow his lead. This sacred Inej and made her think that he wanted to dance despite being watched by a whole room of people with faces full of digust. But she then she feels his hand holding firm to hers and sees that he's walking away she copies his pace, eager to get away from the crowds.

He takes her outside onto the stone walk in the backgarden and lets out sigh. He looks back at her, and the look he gives her brings her back to the moment, saints she loves her eyes (kanej eye loving, I couldn't resist). They stand there for a while just simply existing, holding onto each others hand.

A song suddenly comes on, and Kaz turns to her and asks her for this dance. She panics, thinking that he means to go back. But he lets go of her hand and stands a few metres away from her and holds his hand out. She realises that he means to dance here. She always wanted to dance with him but never thought she'd be able to, I mean, can you imagine seeing the bastard of the barrel dance? But since the heist she's seen the parts, he locked away, and they are each beautiful.

Inej takes his hand, and they fit in place as if they were made to fit each other perfectly. It turns out Kaz Brekker can dance, or maybe it's Kaz Rietveld that can dance, possibly both. It doesn't matter, though she loves Kaz no matter which surname or mask he holds.

She asks him how he knew to dance, and he tells the story of a miserable boy forced to dance lessons by his father, and how during boring mercher parties stakeouts he memorised the moves just to keep himself from boredom. Then he returns the question and asks how she knew the moves because he didn't think the suli had the same dances as the kerch, Inej thinks on that and decides that she must've learned the moves as well but her missteps during the dance can be covered up by her acrobatic reflexes, which causes Kaz to laugh and say that some of her missteps were in fact noticeable for which he got a well deserved arm swat and called a shevrati.

They dance for what feels like years when it was only a few dances, and Inej decides that as long as they are around these people, they'll never be able to be a normal couple. But for now, she's ok with that. She loves every moment of this unconventional relationship she shares with the man she will forever love, no matter how hard some of those moments can be.

Boom dance done. However, there could be another hc to this because I may have thought of another idea for this hc.... enjoy <3

[thepotatowithahat]

Dancing Like Real People Do - A Kanej Fanfic

SUMMARY: Inej and Kaz open up to each other and slow dance together after Kaz recognizes a song that his parents used to dance to. For once, everything is perfect.

TAGS: Fluff, First Kiss, Slow Dancing, No Smut, Hurt/Comfort, Happy Ending, Mutual Pining, Declarations of Love

It was a joyful night in Ketterdam.

The gloomy streets were engulfed in the soft glow of lantern light, while the Dregs danced and sang in carefree harmony. Night had emerged, and somehow a celebration erupted from the streets below. One by one, people joined to witness this rare inkling of beauty in a city of grime. Inej was seated on a table perched outside of the Crow Club, where people were dancing and singing wildly to whatever songs their throats could scream raw. It had been a while since she had last visited Ketterdam, but she had thought that it would be nice to take a break and visit once again. It was strange. Most people would have scoffed at the idea of relaxing in the grimy streets of Ketterdam. But despite its filth and dirt, it was still her home. On nights like these, she was reminded of the beauty this city held. All she had to do was look close enough, and it would reveal itself.

She placed her chin in her hand and breathed in the sweet scent of freshly made waffles and petrichor. A light breeze blew through her hair and she relished in its gentle caress. She was thankful that she decided to stop by at the perfect time. People were singing a Kerch drinking song whilst someone clumsily strummed a guitar. Inej watched with a smile as Jesper clumsily took Wylan’s hand and laughed as he pulled him in for a dance. They held each other’s hands as they clumsily spun around, laughing wildly into the night.

Wylan’s smile was as bright as the morning sun. “What are you doing?”. He laughed gleefully.

“Just showing my spectacular dance moves merchling” chuckled Jesper.

Wylan giggled. “We’re going to fall if you spin any faster!”

Jesper laughed. ”Well then, don’t let go!”

The two stopped spinning after a while, and Jesper pulled Wylan in for the clumsiest waltz Inej had ever seen. His hands were in Wylan’s curls, and Wylan held tight to Jesper as they frantically waltzed across the room, skimming past the rest of the drunken members. She failed to suppress a giggle.

“They’re adorable, aren’t they?”

Inej looked up and there stood Nina, holding a plate with a thick stack of waffles topped with dollops of cream and red berries. She wore a crimson sleeveless dress with flecks of gold embroidery sewed into the fabric. Her hair was shorter now, but she was still the same Nina that Inej knew so well.

Inej smiled. “Saints, I haven’t seen you in ages Nina”

Nina’s face split into a grin. “Glad you could stop by, Inej. Everyone’s been wanting to see you for so long. Especially…” Nina grinned and pointed towards Kaz. “a special someone”

Inej glanced across the room to see Kaz cooped up in a corner, far away from any of the cheery gang members. His shiny hair was slicked back, tiny strands carefully falling into place as leaned back into his chair. His coffee brown eyes glowed in the bright light, and Inej couldn’t help but wonder how a face could be so perfect. Kaz caught Inej’s eyes, and she gently waved at him. He glanced around and then waved back to Inej with a shy smile on his face.

“He’s been grumpier than usual ever since you left,” chuckled Nina. “Who knew Kaz Brekker was such a hopeless romantic?”

Inej laughed “Don’t worry, he’s a little ball of sunshine on holidays”

Nina scoffed. “If the sun was a gloomy ball of darkness, then sure… He’s such “a little ball of sunshine”. Nina made sure to form quotation marks.

Nina took a big bite out of her waffle. “But really, Inej… What do you see in him? I love you and all, but your taste in men… That’s still a mystery to me”

Inej thought of the way Kaz picked locks, his hands carefully working, or the way he always saved her when she was in danger, whether he was with her or not. How his smile reminded her of a shooting star. Rare, but beautiful whenever she caught sight of it. If she could have frozen his smile in time and watched it over and over again, she would have. It terrified her years ago, but now she found comfort from relishing in the warmth of the feeling he gave her.

Inej turned to Nina and smirked. “It wouldn’t be any fun if I told you. Let it be a mystery”

“Saints, why do you two love to be so mysterious?” sighed Nina.

“I guess we’re more alike than you think” chuckled Inej.

Nina smiled and looked around. “So many love birds are out tonight. Makes me feel like I’m missing out.” She chuckled.

Inej looked at Nina and thought about that fateful day all those years ago. How Nina had spent months trying to form a smile on her face, though Inej knew her better than that. She thought of the pained expression Nina made anytime she heard somebody speak Fjerdan, or when she stared at her waffles for too long, and Inej just knew who she was thinking of. It had been years since then, but the memory still lingered in the Crows’ hearts every day. It was a shadow looming over them as a constant reminder.

They were not immortal. One day, every person turned into a memory. Inej looked at the people she loved so dearly, so full of life and joy that it nearly made her heart burst. Nina was much different after that day, but through the years, she had grown stronger. She had been able to smile fully, been able to eat waffles without a care in the world, and had still been the friend Inej cared about dearly.

Inej thought of how Nina must have felt that day. To fight so hard for a happy ending, only to have it snatched away so ruthlessly. It was a cruel joke life had played on her. On all of them. What would she have done if she were Nina? What if one day Kaz was in danger and she couldn’t come save him?

What if Kaz…

She didn’t want to think about it.

“Have you found someone yet, Nina?”. The question came out of nowhere before Inej could stop it. Nina looked at Inej, a surprised expression painted on her face.

Inej scratched her head. “I... I’m sorry it sort of just came out—”

“No no, it’s fine!”. Nina glanced at Inej. “I… I haven’t gotten into any relationship but…”. Nina leaned in to whisper into Inej’s ear. “There… There is someone I like”.

Inej smiled warmly at Nina. “That’s wonderful Nina… I’m happy for you, I really am. How are they?”

“They…”. Nina chuckled and gazed at her waffles, smiling warmly. “They’re wonderful Inej. They’re smart, funny, kind and I… I think I really like them”

Nina had finally found peace after all these years, and Inej couldn’t help but feel everything was just right. Her closest comrades and friends were all in one place, so full of joy that it made her want to bask in the feeling forever.

“Hey, why is there a piano outside?” said someone drunkenly.

“Somebody play it!” said a person on the verge of throwing up.

Jesper slowly turned towards Wylan with a wide grin across his face. “Oh, I wonder who could possibly play us a song?”. Jesper playfully placed an arm around Wylan’s shoulder.

“Say, Wylan, would you know anyone?”

Wylan glanced up at Jesper and laughed nervously. “Do you… Do you really think I could do it? I mean, I’m not the most skilled and-”

“Believe in yourself sunshine”

There was a severe judgement in Wylan’s eyes. “Sunshine?”

“What? It’s cute”. Jesper leaned in closer. “Just like you are”

Wylan’s face flushed a bright pink. “Ok ok, I’ll do it,”, Wylan sighed. “You’re lucky you have such a nice face”

Jesper grinned and ruffled Wylan’s hair. “That’s the spirit”

Inej watched as Wylan nervously walked to the piano. Rows of eyes watched him curiously. He sat on the stool and ran his fingers over the keys, playing a few notes to test the sound. He glanced towards Inej with a worried expression plastered on his face. Inej gave him her most reassuring smile.

It’s okay. Play us a symphony.

Wylan smiled back in gratitude and took a breath in. Then he started to play.

The atmosphere in the room shifted as soon as the first notes rang out in the air. The calming waves of the music replaced the wild energy in the room. Inej watched as people leaned into their chairs and took in the sounds of the beautiful melody. Inej didn’t realise the song, but she remembered how she often heard it hummed by children in the streets of Ketterdam.

It must have been a lullaby.

Many of the Dregs were faintly humming the song and closing their eyes, almost like they were reminiscing about old memories. Jesper looked at Wylan, as if they were the only two in the room. It was as if nothing around him at that moment mattered except him.

Did Kaz ever look at her like that?

Nina laid her head on the table. “I’m feeling incredibly stupid for not bringing them right now…”. Nina sighed and glanced towards Jesper and Wylan. “They really are adorable” Inej nodded. She glanced around the room, looking for Kaz, yet she couldn’t find him.

“Nina, where is Kaz?” asked Inej.

“Hm?”

Nina raised her head from the table and scanned her surroundings thoroughly. “Saints, where is he off to now? Sorry Inej, it’s yet again, another mystery to me”.

“That’s strange, he was here a moment ago”. Inej inspected the crowd until she heard a familiar cane clicking in the distance. She spotted Kaz limping away past the crowd as if he were nothing but a shadow passing by.

Why was he leaving so soon?

Inej pointed towards Kaz. “There he is”.

Nina squinted and sighed. “You have a good eye. Where is he off to now? The party isn’t even done yet, and he just disappeared into thin air.” Nina turned to Inej. “I thought that was your thing?”

“I suppose he learned a few new tricks while I was away”. Inej wondered why Kaz had been so quick to leave when he seemed content a few moments ago. She imagined him cooped up in his tiny room, looking out from the window, watching his comrades laugh in perfect harmony while he was just out of reach, yet never able to draw any closer.

It was a perfect night for her. She wasn’t going to let Kaz feel like it was a lonely one. He always had her back, and she had his.

Always.

“Nina, I’m going to go”. Inej put down the cup she’d been drinking from and abruptly stood up.

Nina tilted her head. “Already?”

Inej sighed. “Yes… I have some… business to attend to”

A wide smirk appeared on Nina’s face. “Oh… I see…”. She looked from Inej to Kaz. “Well… have fun attending to your business”. Nina winked.

Inej rolled her eyes. “I’ll see you tomorrow at the Waffle House. Waffles are on me”

Nina’s face was brighter than a thousand candles. “Captain Inej Ghafa, what a Saint you are!”

Inej chuckled as she softly threaded through the hordes of lethargic people, carefully avoiding the drunk members slouched on the floor. Once she was done, she walked quietly on the rough pavement while she trailed Kaz, who slowly limped towards his room...

Click here to read the rest of the story!

[swanimagines]

The Bastard and the Blood Princess [Chapter 10]

Read it on AO3 | Read it on Wattpad

You had to do it. You had to ignore the memories.

Your father trusted you. You needed to do the deed, you weren’t that child anymore who had found a friend from a boy you tricked.

You were now both monsters in Ketterdam. And one of you had to go, the city wasn’t big enough for both of you.

So why it was so fucking difficult?

You had set your mind on it. Looked for ways to trap Kaz, trick him, snatch a weapon and hide it inside your clothes. But now, looking at Kaz made you think about that.

That little game you had played with Kaz.

The one with those old buttons and a wooden board, you couldn’t remember how the game went, but Kaz had taught it to you. You frowned, why did any of this matter? You had a mission, and you needed to proceed with it.

You followed Kaz through the hallways. your eyes fixed forward but your thoughts swam in your long-forgotten memories. You knew your steps probably echoed through the hallway as you marched forward, but you could only hear little Kaz’s laughter as you sat together on the floor, playing.

He stopped abruptly as you reached the party, making you collide with his back. He turned slightly, glaring at you. “Watch it.”

You stepped back, clasping your hands behind your back. “Sorry.”

He clenched his jaw, leaning towards you slightly. “We’ll get uniforms for Inej and Arken next, but we need a reason to visit the laundry room.”

You narrowed your eyes, trying to think. “One of us will distract the others, and in the meantime the other slips there?”

He shook his head. “No, we need to have an actual reason to visit there.”

His gaze swept over the room, people going by you, giggling and swaying, having drank just a little too much.

“What about–” you started, but Kaz held up his hand.

“Wait here.”

He started walking again, and soon disappeared around the corner. You closed your eyes, grimacing.

Focus, damn it. Neither of you weren’t children anymore, your personal feelings about what had been and what could have been if things were different didn’t matter anymore. You were the Blood Princess. Failing your mission because of having second thoughts wasn’t an option.

But you couldn’t help but think about all those moments you could have killed Kaz, and didn’t take the opportunity. As if that little girl in a silk dress would have cried out without you knowing it was her, telling you not to do it.

You thought you were stronger than her by now. She was your past, but wasn’t your present nor your future.

Right?

You stood in place for quite some time, staring forward, trying to look like you’re keeping an eye on the guests. But as time just kept going by, you decided it was better to move than just stand there, and turned the corner. Two Grisha fed each other muffins near you and laughed, people swayed from side to side, taking support from the walls. It was a big party, that much was clear. A party to show off the Sun Summoner.

Allegedly, Kaz’s voice reminded you in your head.

“Damn you, Kaz, where are you again?” you muttered, cursing some more under your breath. You knew that making your way deeper into the party could be risky, you could get lost. Be left here while others fled with the Sun Summoner. You had no doubts they’d leave you here — maybe Inej would object a little, seeing you had been no harm so far. It was strange, you had a feeling she had gone through a lot and hadn’t spoken to you directly at all, but she was the only one who didn’t glare at you with distrust.

Then, like on cue, you felt a hand on your shoulder and turned around to see Inej. 

Of course he went without you.

You stared at each other for a moment, not speaking, before she nodded towards the party and you started walking there together, side by side. After a moment, Inej stopped and you saw Kaz standing there, staring at the stage where the Sun Summoner stood with General Kirigan. A young girl, a shu. You had to admit that you didn’t expect either of those things. Kaz leaned towards the two of you.

“Lights create an illusion of moving light. One of the Infernis is hiding somewhere, helping it look real — a perfect illusion. People so desperately need someone who could finally make the Fold disappear that they’ll believe anything. A skillfully placed trick of light and dark, it will fool everyone here,” Kaz muttered, causing Inej to glare at him and walk away. Kaz looked after her for a moment and then his eyes briefly flickered to you. “Stay close. I want to keep an eye on you.”

You huffed. “What exactly are you thinking I’d manage to do, all alone?”

He was quiet for a moment, watching as Kirigan made his theatrical speech and made the room go dark. And just before the chatter in the room got silenced, he muttered, “I still wouldn’t put any chances past any Rollins. You should know that by now.”

You rolled your eyes at that. Nothing hadn’t changed, or then Kaz tried to suppress it, desperate to hate you, whatever you did. Why does he drag me along, then, you wondered, stealing a glance on Kaz. Does he feel the familiarity too? 

You sighed and focused on watching the show.

General Kirigan clapped his hands once, and the room got engulfed in shadow and darkness. You couldn’t see a thing, and it made the hairs on your arms stand up. Just for a moment, you expected to hear screams of terror, it being a trap.

But then, a light illuminated the whole room. A small light ball, looking like a small sun, floated in the air, illuminating the girl’s face. You frowned, wondering if Kaz saw any trickery. Because you sure didn’t, the light came from her, no doubt about that.

The show only lasted for about a minute, and immediately after it, Kaz gestured for Inej to join you again.

“We are going to tell her that she’s been requested to join dinner, and walk her there. But we will instead take her outside and stuff her into the trunk before anyone sees anything,” he explained, glancing back at the Sun Summoner as she was led away.

“She’s real,” Inej whispered. “What if…”

He interrupted her harshly, “We will carry on with the plan, otherwise…”

He fell silent, swallowing. You frowned, he was hiding something. Could be useful. If you even had the guts to carry on with the plan anymore.

You shook your head, suppressing a scoff at yourself. Of course you had the guts. You had to have.

But that damn little girl inside you kept trying to plead otherwise, and she was increasingly hard to ignore. She was your past, you tried to remind yourself. Your friendship with Kaz was your past. And you highly doubted Kaz would feel otherwise if you told him who you really were. He definitely wouldn’t cry out your name and rush to hug you, he’d probably look at you for a moment, not caring about it, scoffing a question about if you think it has any importance for the mission. He’d be cold, distanced about it. Or maybe him finding out about it could make him hate you more — even his best friend had actually been against him. 

And after thinking about those possible scenarios, you obviously didn’t want to find out if your guesses were the truth. And you knew it, Kaz would never get to find out who you really were, how you had first met. It would ruin too many things. He would be left to think you met each other years later, when your childish features had melted away, and adulthood and years of hardening yourselves had taken over.

Kaz nodded his head towards the hallway where the Sun Summoner was walking, and you marched to meet her.

“Miss Starkov,” Kaz stated, staring down at her. “We’ve been ordered to walk you to dinner.”

She frowned, turning to look behind her. “But I thought…” She then looked between the three of you and smiled. “Well, actually I am getting hungry.”

You stepped aside as Kaz gestured for her to step in front of you, and you slowly began walking behind her. But you didn’t even get to walk for ten seconds before General Kirigan himself appeared from behind the corner, standing in front of you.

He smiled at you, then at her. “Thank you. I’ll take her from here.”

You watched as the General gave her flowers and let her take his arm, and Kaz took in a deep breath. “Alright, plan B. We’ll go–” he started, but at that moment you caught an Inferni staring at you from the crowd. “Scratch that, plan F. We’ll distract that Inferni and meet at the front yard.”

You separated from each other on that moment and as soon as you had blended into the crowd, you looked back. The Inferni was marching the way Kaz had gone, and there was no doubt on what he was going to do. You looked towards the exit, then back at the hallway, seeing the Inferni turn the corner.

He would kill Kaz, you knew it. It wouldn’t be you who did it, but it would do the job anyway. You knew your father would be glad about it as long as he would die and not meddle with his plans anymore. The way how he would die didn’t matter.

You could just… leave him. And trust the Inferni does the job for you.

But, before you could even look towards the exit again, your legs were taking you towards the direction Kaz and the Inferni were going.

As you reached the end of the hallway, you peeked into the room, which was a small chapel. You saw the Inferni walking on benches, summoning fire into his hand, and you felt your heart pounding faster. You closed your eyes for a moment and sucked in a breath, before you entered the chapel and ducked behind the benches, slowly making your way to the front of the chapel as you heard the Inferni rant about spiders. You didn’t really concentrate on his words, blood was rushing in your ears, adrenaline pounding in your body. You hadn’t sneaked around like this and played with death for a long time, you knew that if anyone saw you crawling there, you would be turned into ash in seconds.

Suddenly, as you had reached the front altar, you heard a whack and froze before carefully peeking up. Kaz stood above the Inferni, holding him down with his good leg.

“Unlike spiders, I only need one good leg. However, you…” he growled and slammed the heavy pillar on the Inferni’s shoulder and continued, “look like you need both hands.”

He then knocked the Inferni out and let out a breath, before he started limping towards where he came from. You were just about to catch up to him and brace to hear his scolds about following him, but then the Inferni suddenly stood up and grabbed a fireball from the candles next to him. 

Your eyes widened, blood rushed in your ears again, and everything slowed down. Without thinking it much, you grabbed a quill from the altar and charged at the Inferni, he turned around just in time to see you before you showed the quill into his neck. He howled in pain, before grabbing your arm, burning through your costume. You screamed, feeling the costume melt into your skin, but you refused to let go, just pushing the quill further into his neck, twisting it to line it up with his neck artery before pulling it out and stabbing again.

Blood began rushing out, splattering onto your face and the Inferni’s eyes widened, before he started gurgling out blood. You smirked, feeling his grip on your forearm loosen as life began to dim in his eyes.

You leaned in, whispering, “I’d tell you to not mess up with my people if you would be left alive. But sadly, your story ends worse than just a nasty scar.”

In moments, the Inferni went limp and fell onto the floor, coughing out blood and you pulled the quill out, letting the blood drain out faster.

Kaz stared at you, and you looked up, wiping your blood-stained cheek, sighing. “Shall we go?”

Kaz nodded and glanced up as Inej jumped down. She took a long look at you before you three made your way towards the back. You glanced at the entrance of the chapel as you heard shouts, by no doubt other guards coming to check what was the noise from the chapel, and they’d find that body and a massive manhunt would be rung out. After a set of narrow hallways, you made it to the back door and were finally out.

Kaz seemed to spot Jesper first, who looked at the carriage and shaking, as if he was sobbing or… laughing? You quickened your steps towards him, before he turned. He looked at you and Kaz looking disheveled, the blood on your cheek, and frowned. “Is everything alright?”

Inej breathed out. “She’s real, Jesper. She made the light sing.”

Kaz scowled, looking up. “We lost her.”

Jesper laughed. “Did we?”

You all frowned at him, but Jesper just started walking towards the carriage. Kaz called out, “Jesper?”

“Just ask.”

They got up, and Jesper looked at Kaz again. “Just ask.”

Kaz scoffed. “Fine. Do we know the location of our target?”

Jesper smirked, and almost gave the horses an order to start moving, but then you cleared your throat. “Oh. Sorry, love, no space up here. You’ll need to go back to the carriage. But it’s mostly a nice thing, you can take a nap, the seats are really soft, seeing that–”

“Figured,” you mumbled and climbed into the carriage. Secretly, you were relieved that you got to be alone and as you sat down, you cleaned your face into your cloak and glanced at your burn. It was numb, indicating nerve damage. Nothing you could do about it now. As soon as the carriage started moving, you pressed your face into your hands, rubbing your temples.

What on earth had gotten into you? That was a perfect opportunity, a perfect way to get the job done, and you blew it. Because of that little girl inside you, who apparently still thought you could still befriend Kaz. Or more — he had been your first, and to this day only, crush as well, which had greatly annoyed your father. Any romantic feelings hadn’t been awakened in you. Or at least… you wanted to believe so.

You slapped yourself, get it together, you’re the Blood Princess, for fuck’s sake. You lifted your eyes to look at the roof, before you laid your head against the headrest. Maybe Jesper’s suggestion was a good one, maybe a nap would clear your head. You hadn’t slept at all after that night at that motel with Kaz, maybe that was the reason why you had such foolish thoughts?

You closed your eyes, letting a semblance of sleep claim you, and only hope you’d have new determination for your mission, or whatever you’d do, or need to go through, when you’d wake up.

---

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[astrhae]

alright I just read your hanaki!Wesper story and when I tell you it emotionally wrecked me in the best way possible im being so for real!!! I never cry at fics it's like a flex for me but this made me sob like a baby

its so poetically written and gut wrenchingly heartbreaking and I hope I can tear somebody apart so lovingly and put them back together like you do with your wonderful writing one day!!

akdjdhdhk hi hello! one day i hope to read your writing and be lovingly torn apart and put back together by it 💙 also, thank you so much and sending you all the hugs and *slides some tissues and a fluffy (ish) deleted scene* i hope this helps with the tears :)

Some days, Wylan still coughed, dry and painful, the phantom feeling behind his throat forcing him to claw for air. Even with the flowers gone from him, his body still remembered, still carried all the marks of his past mistakes. “I love you,” Jesper would remind Wylan on those days, his gentle, gentle hands tucking Wylan’s curls behind his ears, forcing Wylan to look at him. To look, and to be seen in return. “I want you,” Jesper would add, his voice a wave lapping gentle over shores of hurt. “You have me.” And Wylan would tilt his head until his lips brushed Jesper’s palm, a kiss and an apology. A kiss, and a confession: you have me, too. Like this: wretched and broken. Wretched, and healing, and trying. For you, for you, for us. “Thank you,” Wylan would say after, when the clouds had passed and his lungs were light, and Jesper would shake his head. “Don’t.” “Why not?” “Because,” Jesper would lead them “Because,” Jesper would always have a warm cup of tea ready, sweetened with just a hint of honey to help soothe the cough, “I haven’t even earned your forgiveness yet.” “I’ve forgiven you,” Wylan would remind him, because he has, and he will again. “And I’ve forgiven you,” Jesper would reply, because Wylan hadn’t been faultless in it either. “But it’s harder to forgive myself.” They’d taken back out the old oil paintings that Wylan had hidden away after Jesper had left. The miniature portraits that Marya had painted of them grinning, the grand canvas of them stealing glances at each other that used to hang over the entryway, naive and young and still fresh with a love untested, the first thing anyone would see when they entered the Van Eck mansion – at least, if they entered it the proper way, without lockpicks and shadows. The first thing: a declaration of their happiness. But Marya had painted a new portrait of them for the entryway, with Wylan’s hand clasped in Jesper’s, and a ring hanging from a chain around Wylan’s neck, and a laugh shared between them, their eyes crinkled around the corners and their cheeks flushed with fondness, with a love hardwon. It was, Wylan realised, less a declaration of happiness, and more of hope. One day, one day they’d get there. “Jesper,” Wylan would offer the tea back to him, “I loved you. I love you. I don’t regret it.” And Jesper would shake his head again, as lost as Wylan had been. “Why not?” Wylan thought of Kaz and Inej, Nina and Matthias. He thought of his mother, and his father, and he thought he understood a little better now, a little braver now. “I can’t regret it,” he repeated, “because I can’t regret us.” Some days, they still needed time to find their way back, but Wylan tipped his chin up toward the sun, toward the future, toward Jesper’s smile, and he smiled back. Sometimes forgiveness looked like patience. Sometimes love looked like Jesper’s spoons beside Wylan’s forks, like Jesper’s shirt on Wylan’s shoulders. Sometimes, happiness looked like this: fractures, fractals, the branches of the cherry tree reaching higher into the sky, covering the blue with greens and pinks and the edge of promise. Sometimes, happiness was this: a cup of tea passed between them, warmth spilling inside them, and the truth, the truth sitting between them – less a poison, more a bedrock.

[violets-and-books]

I have a present for you:

Jesper groaned in frustration. “Well if Kaz hadn’t signaled us too soon-”

Kaz scowled. “Wylan forced my hand.”

Wylan’s head snapped over to him in surprise and confusion. Inej furrowed her brow, and Nina and Matthias glared at Wylan. Jesper scoffed a fake laugh. “Wylan ‘forced’ you? He couldn’t force a cat to eat.”

“Hey!”

Kaz looked at Wylan with no emotion except the slightest bit of annoyance in the quirk of his lip. His hands rested menacingly on his cane. Weighted for breaking bones, he had said right after Inej watched him smash a man’s head in. “You told me to shoot the gun so I had to.”

Wylan frowned and turned around on the couch to face him. “I told you to because there were soldiers coming.”

“It wasn’t your call to make,” he hissed. 

“Then you shouldn’t have done it, if it was such a bad call!”

“I had no choice. Vocal barosie,” Wylan turned around and shook his head, “Can control people with their voice-” He rapped his cane against the floor. “Look over here, Van Eck!”

Wylan flinched and turned around with a sharpness to his eyes Inej didn’t like. She didn’t want Kaz yelling, but it wasn’t like she could tell him to stop, it was dark out. Mistborn and Dhamphirs controlled the night. Wraiths were but a myth to keep children out of the woods. 

“That’s not true.”

Nina scoffed. “Everyone knows baros singers are dangerous because they could convince you of just about anything. 

Wylan grit his teeth and turned to face her on the other couch. “That’s not true!”

“Oh yeah?” She said, “Can you prove it?”

He scowled. “Stamp your foot.” Nina didn’t move, just raised an eyebrow. “See? You didn’t do it.”

Jesper rolled his eyes. “You can control whether you influence someone or not.”

Wylan whirled around to him. Inej saw his eyes dart to each of them like a cornered animal; She knew the feeling. “No I can’t! When I sing I can’t control if it affects people or not! That’s not how we work!”

He crossed his arms and looked bored, if anything. “You can’t prove that.”

“You can’t disprove it!”

Matthias grunted. “No barosie are to be trusted.”

Wylan stood up and whirled on him, his back to Jesper now. Inej only just realized she probably didn’t help him feel any less boxed in. She crept over to the couch and sat behind Wylan so he wouldn’t see her, but to let the rest of them know she was taking his side. She’d never had any reason to disbelieve a baros before. They were nothing but kind to her every time she met one. 

He raised his voice and pointed a finger. “You fucking Drüskelle liar! You know! You know it’s not true! You all spread hideous fucking lies about Barosie because they’re the only supernatural you can’t fight.”

Matthias glared. “I could fight you.

Wylan crossed his arm. “I’d have you on your knees begging me forgiveness with a lullaby before you even got to me.”

“We’re not so easily manipulated!”

“You get my point!”

Matthias scowled. Inej hated yelling. She didn’t like the snap in Wylan’s musical voice or the utter frustration in Matthias. She didn’t like Nina, who was always so willing to help, making Wylan upset. And she certainly didn’t appreciate Jesper, who kept himself hidden from society for rumors about mistborns, treating Wylan like he was any different. She didn’t know what she expected for Kaz, but she was certainly disappointed. 

With slow and gentle precision, she put a hand on Wylan’s shoulder. He flinched, but turned and looked at her and relaxed. He looked at where she had been sitting in the window, then back to her. “Do you believe that? That we’re liars and can make people do what we want?”

She shook her head. The scraping of a chair sounded as Jesper got off the desk and pushed the furniture piece away with his feet. “Inej, come on-” She glared, and he shut up. 

Wylan nodded and hugged himself, looking small, cornered. She guided him to sit down again. He was facing Nina, and he looked up and saw her raised eyebrow and skeptical face. Inej sat next to him and wouldn’t look at her, only at Matthias. She saw it, only for a moment: The brief flash of guilt in his eyes. He was lying. He knew those things weren’t true. 

“Wylan,” Jesper said. “Admit you goofed up.”

He looked at him and spat, “I didn’t.”

Jesper glared and crossed his arms, then looked at Kaz. “Did you want to fire the gun?”

“No,” he said, watching the scene unfold like a chess game. “He made me.”

Wylan stood up again and turned on him. “No I didn’t!” 

“You did, because you were scared, and you know it.”

Wylan’s ears were pink, but Inej couldn’t tell if it was from anger or embarrassment. Perhaps both. “You’re lying!”

“I’m not.”

He looked up. “Kaz, I swear to Ghezen-”

He hummed skeptically. “What? You’ll sing me a tune about how angry you are?”

“Kaz,” he looked back at him, and it was the calmest he had been in the whole argument, “I’m probably the only person in this room who could make you cry. The only person in the world, in fact.” Kaz scowled. “Admit you’re lying.”

“Make me.”

“No! Do it because I know you have a kind bone somewhere in your broken, dead body!”

“Wylan, that’s not fair-” He cut Nina off. 

“Not fair? You know what’s not fair? That seer’s get drugged and then used as mindless middlemen.” She pursed her lips. He pointed at Matthias. “You know what’s not fair? That Moran’s think they have to kill to defend themselves, that that’s in their blood.” He looked Jesper in the eyes, and Inej saw him swallow. “That mistborn are practically extinct ever since the fall of the Great Empire. It’s not fair that people hunt them and use a glass knife to hang their heads on their walls!” Jesper looked away. He whirled on Kaz. “That Dhamphirs are just a stronger species’ bastard children!”

Nina stood and came to him, grabbing his shoulders. “Quit!”

He pushed her away. He looked at Matthias. “Tell them what else isn’t fair: That drüskelle are so afraid of Barosie, they spread rumors about them that are so integrated into society, that we’re not used as anything but performers and prostitutes!”

He looked away. “You’re lying.”

“Matthias, I will sing, and you’ll tell the truth whether you like it or not.”

He glared at Wylan, and Wylan glared right back. It was silent, but it was the worst of silences. It was the silence before Inej died every night, it was the silence Jesper had to bear when Kaz sent him to spy. It was a silence that Nina was forced into when she took Juda Parem, it was the silence Matthias had to suffer when he was locked away with his people. It was the silence Wylan had to live with when he was a child. 

“You know it’s not true,” he said, and the tears in his eyes had rusted the cords in his throat like a worn and broken guitar. 

Matthias looked down. He didn’t speak for a good minute. Finally, he said, just barely above a whisper, because he wasn’t one for a whisper, he said, “It’s not true.”

Wylan stepped back, and Nina and Jesper started. “What?” Nina demanded. 

Matthias cleared his throat. “It’s not true. Wylan is right. The drüskelle started the rumors about barosie centuries ago. They’re not liars, most of them,” he added, with a pointed look at Wylan. “They’re just performers. We’re not allowed to kill them, by code, so it was easier to make them afraid than to fear them.”

Jesper scowled. “If that were true, not so many people would believe it.”

“Some barosie even believe it,” he said. “It was spread everywhere. Barosie were hunted down for a while after a tribe of Moran drüskelle told a city that the barosie there had come to steal away their children because they had lost fertility through sexual diseases.”

“Grolcose,” Wylan whispered, looking at Matthias. “The city was Grolcose, and no baros within their right mind will go there now because they'll hang you from the gate.”

He shook his head. “Music is against the law, in fact.”

Wylan scowled. He looked at Kaz, who simply stood. He said, “So you do have a spine.”

A trick, Inej realized. Of course it was a trick. Kaz knew better than to know anything other than the truth.

I decided Kaz knew, he just needed to test something :)

Kaz fucking Brekker, I'm going to kill you. I'm not even sure if I'm glad he's up to something, I'm just angry with everyone for being angry at Wylan and aaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

"The tears in his eyes had rusted the chords in his throat" - Lore, you dropped this 👑👑👑👑👑

This universe sounds amazing from an outward perspective. But it's probably pretty shit from an in universe perspective and isn't that just the best kind of universe?

Inej 🥺🥺

I love that she can't speak as a Wraith, that's really cool, I think. Symbolism and everything, having her voice taken away, having her agency removed. But I love that she's still on Wylan's side. She knows and I love that

"You can control when you influence someone or not" - Jes, not you too

I hate hate hate hate hate how they all have rumours (mostly likely spread by the drüskelle) about them but they're so eager to turn on their friends because their rumours are worse. It's so like real life in that way, I applaud you

"Admit you goofed up" - ThE wAy He'S sAyInG iT lIkE iT's No BiG dEaL tHaT tHeY'rE bLaMiNg WyLaN fOr SoMeThInG hE dIdN't DoOoOOOOoOOOO, JesPER IM GONNA HURT YOU VERY BADLY BUT NOT KILL YOU, YOU NEED TO REPENT AND APOLOGISE

Okay, it is very Kaz-like and very smart for Kaz to say just the right, calculated thing so they all air their bias but I still DON'T LIKE ITTT

[chapter1991]

Another Shot

“Another day.” He whispered to himself with his eyes closed. He didn’t hear someone slide up next to him, so focused on his breathing. So, he startled a little when he heard a voice, his voice. “How many?” He asked, but Jesper had a feeling he knew just how many it has been. Jesper opened his eyes and looked sideways. The deep blue eyes from Wylan Van Eck or like he prefers Wylan Hendriks, were already on him. His beautiful red curls hung loosely around his face, framing it perfectly. That boy was going to be the end of him, he thought to himself as he looked at Wylan. 

The dark wet streets of the Barrel were empty besides the young gang members that were hiding from the rain under the pent on the top of the stairs. He could see them follow him from in front of the houses on his left and right. But he kept his eyes trained on the street in front of him while his fingers ticked on his revolvers on his waist. He heard the sounds of the club before it came into view.

Jesper walked in the Crows club, rubbing the rain out of his hair as the door closed behind him. The club was crowded with people. Men and women gambling, laughing and tapping their fingers nervously on the table as the ball rolled waiting to see if they got lucky. Seeing them all gamble made him want to scratch an itch, but he pushed through. He pushed through the crowds until he reached the backdoor. He closed the door behind him quickly, drowning out the sounds of the club. He rested his head against the door and let out a deep sigh.

“Another day.” He whispered to himself with his eyes closed. He didn’t hear someone slide up next to him, so focused on his breathing. So, he startled a little when he heard a voice, his voice.

“How many?” He asked, but Jesper had a feeling he knew just how many it has been.

Jesper opened his eyes and looked sideways. The deep blue eyes from Wylan Van Eck or like he prefers Wylan Hendriks, were already on him. His beautiful red curls hung loosely around his face, framing it perfectly. That boy was going to be the end of him. He thought to himself as he looked at Wylan.

“Lost count.” He shrugged, trying to pretend it wasn’t hard not to place a bet in the room behind him. Pretending he didn’t know the exact number of days since his last bet, or the last place. 

A betting hall where he must walk through every day to meet up with the others in Kaz’s office. Was it still punishment for letting something slip to one of Pekka Rollins’ men? Or was it so he could learn something from it. Whatever it was, it wasn’t easy, the only bright side was the young red-curly headed boy that was standing next to him. His blue eyes, that Jesper had missed so much, were staring up at him.

They were still looking at each other, the only ones in the silent empty hallway. It has been a few weeks since their first kiss in the hotel and neither knew why but it hadn’t happened again. They were living together for Saint’s sake, but still nothing had happened besides the obvious flirting. He would never admit it, but Jesper dreamed about the kiss almost every night. How those plump rosy lips brushed against his, how his hand went to the nape of his neck, pulling him closer.

They were both leaning against the door as they looked at each other. They both inched closer to each other, slowly but steadily. But when he heard the tapping of Kaz’s cane echo through the hallway, Wylan jumped back. Jesper looked at him with a cheeky grin as Wylan’s cheeks flushed. It was only when he saw Kaz appear in the corner of his eye, that he looked away.

“Jesper, Wylan. Let’s go.” Kaz said as he leaned on his cane and walked past them, apparently oblivious to the tension between them. Jesper shot Wylan a last wink before they followed him into his office. The others were already there. Nina was curled up in the corner of the couch next to Matthias, while Inej was perched on the other side.

Jesper was leaning against a tree at the edge of small forest on the edge of Ketterdam. The forest was nothing to look at, just a bunch of lifeless trees, no leave in sight. Some of the trees could fall down with just a blow of the wind if it was set just right. Even the tree he was leaning against was creaking from his weight. His fingers were tapping restlessly on his pearl-handled revolvers as he waited.

He could hear Wylan’s boots on the gravel as he walked closer. He smiled to himself when he saw Wylan looking around for him. He pushed himself of the old tree, making it creak once more, and stepped in his line of sight.

“Looking for me, merchling?” He said with a lopsided grin.

“Saint, Jes!” Wylan clutched his heart. “Where did you come from?”

“Everywhere, nowhere.” He shrugged as he stepped closer.

“Right.” Wylan frowned and Jesper couldn’t help the thought of kissing it away. “I got your note.” He said waving a little piece of paper in the air. “Why did you want me to meet you here?” He asked looking at the dead forest in front of him.

“Shooting practice.” Jesper said excitedly as he clapped his hands.

“Shooting practice.” Wylan repeated.

“Come here.” He gestured him closer with his finger. Wylan pursed his lips as he walked closer and because of that, Jesper had a hard time not looking at the lips of the boy. When he reached him, he placed his hands on his shoulders and turned him towards the forest. There was a large tree trunk lying on the ground amidst the dead trees, on the trunk were five iron cans placed on it. Jesper leaned down so his lips touched the shell of his ear as he said. “Shooting practice.”

He smiled as he felt Wylan shiver against him. He took his revolver out of its holster, rolled it around on his index finger before he held his hand open for him to take. Wylan looked wide-eyed from the gun to his eyes. “Jesper.” He gasped. “I can’t-”

“I trust you.” He said as he placed the gun in his hand and went to stand behind him. And he meant it, he trusted the boy with his life, and he wanted him to know that. He rested his hands on his shoulders before they slid down slowly over his arms. Another shiver ran through the boy in front of him when his hand travelled lower on his arms. He let his hands slid down until it reached his hands, he helped him hold up the gun, placing his delicate fingers in all the right places as they aimed it towards the cans. They were standing flush against each other, Wylan’s back against his chest. His face was right next to his as they looked at the tree line. Jesper heard the curly-headed boy take in a deep breath.

“Lower your elbows.” He said against his ear. Wylan did as he was told but he stood stiff against him. “Relax, love.” He grinned like a Chesire cat when he saw Wylan blush fiercely from the pet name. But he relaxed in front of him, the tension in his shoulders vanished.

“Try the largest one first.” His voice barely a whisper in his ear. He saw Wylan cradle the gun carefully. His thumb grazing the pearl handle softly before he shifted his aim. Then a shot rang loudly through the dead forest. He missed. “Try again.” Jesper whispered as his thumb traced a circle on his hand. And he did, and he missed again.

“You’re too distracting.” He grumbled, and Jesper laughed. His laugh made his chest bounce against Wylan’s back. But he stepped backwards, creating a distance between them and let his hands fall down from his hands. He grinned as Wylan looked a little saddened at the loss of touch. But Wylan lifted the pearl-handled revolver again once Jesper was a safe distance away. Jesper saw him pull back the trigger, he curled his hand before ... the bullet went straight through the can, letting it fall from the trunk. “Saints, Jesper! Don’t help.” Wylan turned to him.

“Who? Me? I didn’t do anything.” Jesper shrugged as he tried to look innocent. He sighed when Wylan glared at him. “Fine.” He threw up his hands in defence. “I won’t do anything, I promise. Just try following the wind.”

“Follow the wind.” Wylan had that cute little frown again as he looked to the remaining cans. Jesper had his own hand on his other gun in its holster, his foot tracing circles in the gravel beneath it. He cocked his head as he looked at the red head, how he handled his gun attentively. How his fingers went over it as if he was examining it closely, as if he was going to take it apart and put it back together. The thought made him nervous, and his foot started tapping. He cleared his throat. Wylan snapped out of it, and his eyes founds Jesper’s. He flushed brightly pink and looked back to the tree line. Where was the merchling’s head at? He smiled to himself. Jesper saw him adjust the grip on his revolver and aimed it at the tree trunk. He heard him murmur. “Follow the wind.” And his eyes caught the plastic bag that was hanging in one of the branches, showing the direction of the wind. A minute later a third shot rang out, hitting the edge of the can.

“I didn’t do anything!” Jesper held out his hands again when Wylan’s eyes shot to him. “You’re just a natural.” He added with a wink.

“I know you didn’t, you oaf.” Wylan grinned with flushed cheeks. “Want to help me with the smaller ones?” He asked and his eyes sparkled. Jesper couldn’t help but mimic the grin as he sauntered over.

“Where do you want me?” He whispered in his ear as he stood behind him leaving enough distance between them, so they weren’t touching.

“A little closer.” He said. Jesper was surprised from his audacity. But Wylan was getting more flirtatious and more daring by the day. That boy was full of surprises. So, he did as he was told and stepped closer. “A little more.”

Jesper’s grin was wide as he took another step, standing flush against his back. His heart was beating fast in his chest, and he knew Wylan could feel it pounce on his back, but he also knew that it must’ve been the same for him or else he would have teased him about it, just like he would. He leaned closer, so his mouth brushed against his ear.

“What now?” He breathed as he rested his hands on Wylan’s hips.

Wylan turned in his arms, and those deep blue eyes were staring up at him. The grip on his hips tightened involuntarily with the look he was giving him, a look from desire, from wanting. They leaned towards each other, and if you asked who kissed who first that day, they wouldn’t know. One time it was Jesper, the other time it was Wylan. But it didn’t matter, because it would always come back to the moment in the hotel, where Wylan had kissed Jesper first.

The kiss was fire, the kiss ignited something in him that was dormant for a long time, and he pulled him closer. His perfect rosy plumb lips were covering his and were moving slightly, but from the moment Jesper pulled him closer, the kiss became harder, more passionate. Jesper nipped on his bottom lip, and Wylan opened his mouth willingly. Wylan’s hands went up to the nape of his neck, tugging him lower. Without even realising it, he was walking them towards a tree. Wylan nearly stumbled over a rock on the ground when he was stepping backwards, but neither broke the kiss. Only when Wylan’s back hit the tree, they broke apart, catching their breaths as their heads leaned against each other.

“I’ve been wanting to do this since-”

“Me too.” Jesper smiled, his breaths still heavy. But he didn’t care that his breathing was still heavy, he dived down and started nipping and sucking on Wylan’s pale neck. Leaving purple bruises in its wake. He grinned against his skin when Wylan moaned from his lips. “This isn’t why I asked you here, just so you know.” He said between the attacks on his neck.

“It isn’t?” Wylan chuckled. “Too bad.” Jesper pulled back from his neck to look at Wylan with raised eyebrows. Wylan had a glint of mischief in his eyes as he looked at him. “Next time I’ll teach you how to make a bomb in the lab.”

“Can’t wait.” Jesper grinned as he licked his lips before he attacked Wylan’s lips again. They stood there kissing against an old tree on the edge of the dead forest for a long time. And when they finally broke apart because the rain started to fall from the sky, they intertwined their fingers together as they walked home. Their home. Jesper thought with a start. The thought made him smile all the way down to the house, an extra spring in his step as he held Wylan’s hand in his. The smile became even larger when he saw Wylan’s face turn bright red when people looked at their intertwined hands, especially if it was someone he knew, but he never let go, nor will Jesper.  

[sleepless-crows]

Kanej in SoC 3 as Cornelia Street

this was so long, i finally shortened it

this feels like a fanfiction for some reason

we were in the backseat drunk on something stronger than the drinks in the bar

i want kaz to be drunk on inej's laugh the first moment she steps into ketterdam

"i rent a place on cornelia street" i say casually in the car

i want kaz and inej to walk around ketterdam or kaz escort inej to the slat when she comes back

we were a fresh page on the desk, filling in the blanks as we go

i want that when inej comes back, they feel as if they're ready to try harder for each other now. that everything is a blank slate and the time they've spent apart paved the way for this fresh page

as if the streetlights pointed in an arrowhead leading us home

as if walking around ketterdam, these old familiar streets, with inej beside kaz, just like old times, but different because of the times he walked those streets while she was sailing the seas elsewhere, feels like home once again

and i hope i never lose you, hope it never ends. i'd never walk cornelia street again

i want kaz to be scared of losing her. i want him to think that every street, every alleyway, every dark little corner or bustling club would not be the same without her. i want him to fear losing her more than anything else in the world

that's the kind of heartbreak time could never mend. i'd never walk cornelia street again.

i want it to be the thing kaz fights for the most because he knows it will be the thing he will never recover from

and baby, i get mystified by how this city screams your name. and baby, i'm so terrified of if you ever walk away. i'd never walk cornelia street again

before inej comes back, i want kaz walking in ketterdam, seeing her in every thing and every place and have her name echo through his mind. and now that she's with him, he doesn't want to think of a time when she leaves forever and be taunted by all those thoughts knowing she won't ever return

windows swung right open, autumn air, jacket 'round my shoulders is yours.

i want kaz to bring inej to his room in the slat. i want him to lend inej his jacket (because not only is it a romantic gesture, but it symbolizes how kaz is taking off piece-by-piece his armor for inej)

we bless the rains on cornelia street, memorize the creaks in the floors

in the lying, thieving world of ketterdam, they bless it with the pure and true love that they have for each other. and every moment they try and memorize because in the back of their heads, they know inej will have to leave

back when we were card sharks playing games, i thought you were leading me on

i want them to remember the time before inej left and how different it was then from how it is now, and how scary it is to navigate not seeing each other for so long (it could be 2 years, we don't know)

i packed my bags, left cornelia street, before you even knew i was gone. but then you called, showed your hand. i turned around before i hit the tunnel.

i want inej/kaz doubting them once inej comes back because although they know that they love the other, there will inevitably be an uncertainty because of how long they spent away from each other. then those doubts being proved wrong

sat on the roof, you and i.

i want them to be side by side on a rooftop. or anywhere in ketterdam. being like how they were before whenever they camped out for jobs or kept a lookout on a target. but this time, it's just to be beside each other when they couldn't be for so long

you hold my hand on the street

even though they've already held hands. them doing it again after being separate would still be special and impactful. and we'd get to see how kaz, especially, tried to heal after all those months/years. and proof that they *are* trying

walk me back to that apartment

years ago, we were just inside.

barefoot in the kitchen

domestic kanej

sacred new beginnings, that became religion

i want everything to feel new and scary to them but knowing that all the time they spent apart was for this sacred new beginning where they come back better for each other, healed more for each other. and no saint ever watched over me, not like you have. because inej is the reason kaz tries to get better, his saint that's always looked out and cared for him. and now he looks upon her as his reason, his faith, the only thing he truly believes in that could have ever changed him

in conclusion,

[thatfangirlofsb]

T/W: Spoilers of grishaverse.

Your highness (VIII)

"So you and Zoya..." Jesper took off his hat, putting it on Wylan's head who seemed to have seen something very interesting in the water. "Is clearly that there has been something, but... I didn't expect you to blurt it out so easily."

"Good plan." Kaz said grabbing his cane and hitting Matthias with it, trying to wake him up. "Making them focus on something completely different from what they wanted to know. Embarrassing, but effective." He hit him again, harder this time, and the fjerdan seemed to snap back to reality. "Welcome Helvar, we are in the middle of nowhere and the ship has moved away."

"And your weight is sinking the only way we have not to float away." Jesper looked to his left; where Nikolai stood with his head between his legs, surely regretting what he had said, and then to his right; where Wylan continued with his gaze fixed on that liquid that was soon going to gulp them. "And surely Tolya, Tamar, Inej, Genya, Nina and Zoya end up more meters under the sea than we are going to do."

"Nina?" The drüskelle's voice was as usual again, with contempt and fury; he was already fine.

"Yes, the one you tried to kill in Hellgate." Jesper sighed, grabbing the hat again and putting it back on. "Lots of muscle but no brain, Nina is right."

"I have an idea." Wylan spoke, drawing a smile to Jesper. "But we'll probably end up soaked and with water everywhere."

"I'll wait for you to finish before showing my satisfaction with you, merchant boy."

"Kaz will stay rowing. And we'll get out of the boat." The zemeni's face was no longer one of joy, but of doubt. "The bodies float in the water, if we hold each other's legs in a row the boat will be able to carry us all without sinking." Jesper's grimace was lowering the corners more and more. "Only one will have to hold on to the boat, the heaviest, and leave the rest of his weight on the sea while the others hold on to the feet from largest to smallest."

They all looked at Matthias, but only Nikolai dared to speak; coming out of his little trance for a few seconds.

"And we trust the fjerdan completely?" He raised his hands in surrender when he saw Matthias's face. "It's not for nothing, just because you're from Fjerda, drüskelle, you've tried to kill two grisha several times and you don't mix colors well."

"Everything but the last." Jesper said looking at Kaz, searching for an order. "Boss?"

"Wylan…I'll leave it in your hands." He gripped the oars and looked back with his planning face. "I have to take revenge on Zoya Nazyalensky."

"Nina..." Matthias stated as well.

"What kind of education do they give you in Fjerda? You only know how to say names and short phrases."

"Is a man of not many words." The zemeni answered Nikolai, getting up and ready to jump into the water. And he would have if Wylan's hand gripping his jacket hadn't stopped him. "What happens now?"

"There is a small disadvantage." The explosion expert gave a slight nervous smile while tilting his head slightly. "The weight of the clothes would be a problem, so..."

"If you wanted to see me naked, you could have told me earlier, market boy." And everyone but Matthias and possibly Kaz would have laughed if they weren't in that situation. But they weren't on sofas in a living room with a fire going; but in the middle of the sea, completely lost and in a boat that was sinking more and more.

"No." Matthias spoke, but Jesper had taken off his jacket and was already reaching for the shirt. "I'm not going to..."

"Sea."

"Sea?" Wylan's voice made the gunman forget about the fjerdan's refusal for a few minutes.

"Sea."

"I'll always love you." He gently picked up the plaid jacket, which had been left on the boat, and balled it up, throwing it far with his long arm. "Now the next thing."

"No, I'm not going to undress."

"You can keep the underwear." Wylan spoke, trying to help the fjerdan with words to follow the plan.

"No, I'm not going to..."

"Take it off or I'll rip it off." Nikolai stood on his toes, trying to get at the same heigh with the fjerdan but he couldn't. "My shipmates, grisha under the crown's protection, and your Wraith are there. So you can take it off now." Matthias's crossed arms intimidated him a bit, so he lowered his feet to the ground as normal and stepped away slightly. "You, fjerdans, aren't very familiar? Well, I have part of my family there. My companions, with whom I've experienced many things. And, if that's not enough for you, there's also my future baby. And if I die without seeing it , Zoya dies or we both die... I swear I will chase you wherever and however." Matthias left his arms hanging, though he was still fully clothed. "I know that for your fjerdan culture what we have done is wrong, but I don't care. Do you know why? Because I love her and that's what I've always dreamed of with her. And now I'm going to fight for that and to save all of us. Will you join or not?

Without saying a word, Matthias began to remove his shirt with disapproving looks towards everyone. Wylan was about to clap, but remembered something was missing.

"And the tracker?"

Kaz stepped back slightly, letting them see his curled up body inside the boat before explaining.

"He hit his head when the squaller threw us." With a single glance at the drüskelle, he tossed his shirt into the water and approached Mal. "Matthias, do the honours." The fjerdan grabbed the limp body by the shirt and lifted it slightly. He pulled his spare hand away and hit him open-palmed on the right cheek; with such strength that the boy from the orphanage snapped his eyes open.

"Alina!"

"It's not Sunshine, Oretsev. It's Fjerdanshine." Nikolai said, placing a hand on Helvar's back in gratitude, it didn't quite reach his shoulder, but he quickly removed it when he saw his face. "We need you to take off your clothes."

"What?"

"You can keep the underwear." Wylan smiled slightly, though he felt like a bad support despite showing all his teeth. "And jump into the water afterwards."

[°°°]

"Come on, with more energy." Kaz said mockingly as he watched them from the calm of the boat, in his clothes and not sinking as he rowed.

"The fjerdan is moving his foot too hard."

"How can you have such thin ankles, Nikolai?"

"Why is your hand so cold?"

Wylan heard everything from the end of the line. He didn't know how much time had passed since the beginning of their strange journey, the only thing that came to his mind was how, from the first to the last, they moved their legs up and down in slightly rhythmic movements.

"We need to copy the same pace, otherwise we're not going to get anywhere." He raised his head a little, which was above the water, trying to see a reference point in which he could support his calculations about the distance. "It is easier than it seems to be."

"We are in our underwear, floating in the sea and we don't know if we are going in the right direction." Jesper spoke, between sad, for the loss of his beloved hat, and tired; but more the first. "Is that simple to you, little merchant?"

"Dje janin ess."

"Thank you." Nikolai said, still not understanding a word Matthias had said. "But even though my mother is of Fjerda... I don't know anything about fjerdan."

"And you know kerch?" Jesper was moving his long legs in movements that were too strong for the blonde to be lifted out of the water a bit by his arm.

"I have had to talk with too many merchants for loans for the crown." But then he decided to add something. "Mal only knows ravkan and a few other words from other languages."

"How do you say 'move and don't stand there like a fucking stiff stick' in ravkan?" Wylan asked, watching as he had to exert more strength in his legs thanks to the tracker's almost lack of movement.

" 'Kei onolich yash?' " Nikolai laughed, and the demolition expert took it as madness or nervousness; although he hoped it was the last one. He repeated it, and Mal's question to the king was not long in coming.

"Why did he ask me if I want to marry him?"

"I don't know, it will be a way to ask for a little commitment in a mission. Kerch stuff."

"I need you all to follow the same rhythm." An idea passed through Wylan's head and, as a last resort, he decided to release it. "From Kaz to the end, each one say what gives you energy to keep swimming and move the legs up and down at the same time. But we all have to be fast." Nikolai began to translate it for Mal, who sighed in surprise.

"I'm not going to do that..."

"Boss, please." Jesper begged a bit, visibly desperate already. "It's our last option."

"Money." Kaz began in a monotone tone of voice.

"Nina." Matthias roared.

"Help the Wraith." Jesper blurted out.

"Zoya!" Nikolai shouted with joy. "And save everyone, of course."

"Get out alive and see Alina." Mal continued.

"Not drowning without anyone remembering me and just being fish food." Wylan finished.

"Are you ok?" The king asked with concern. "Even you have lowered my hopes."

"Keep going." Mal said in Ravkan, and immediately Nikolai began to translate. "We are close."

"You could have said it earlier." The king complained.

"I like to see you desperate."

[°°°]

They all fell to the ground as soon as they finished climbing the height of the ship until they reached the deck. And they would have continued there if they had not encountered such a warlike scene.

Some bodies were already on the ground, and they took advantage of it. They hid behind some boxes and stole all the weapons that two grisha and two already dead otkazat'sya had on them. There weren't enough to go around, so some were left without any weapons. That wasn't going to stop them though.

"Okay, this is the plan..."

"I do not follow orders from a ravkan." Ignoring Nikolai's words, Matthias got up and grabbed a gun. He hadn't come there to defend those drüsje; but to fulfill the mission that had been entrusted to him a long time ago. "Nina Zenik!" When he came out of hiding, and by shouting his name, he managed to make the heartrender turn her head towards him; although keeping her gaze fixed on the drüskelle was already taken care of by his lack of clothing.

"Matthias?" Nina asked in surprise, although she quickly came out of her stupor when she saw how one of the mutineers was approaching from behind and he didn't notice. "Matthias!"

Her scream was useless, he was ready to shoot and finally kill her. But the grisha spread out her arms to summon. The mutineer quickly fell to the ground struck down and Matthias, seeing how Nina lowered her arms again and nothing had happened to him, turned his head to finally look at the man who had tried to kill him.

"Nina?" Matthias said, still doubting the grisha's clear actions.

"You'll thank me later, try not to die first." She made puppy eyes at him before running off, to which the drüskelle yelled her name angrily again.

The others were already struggling when he snapped out of his stupor and hatred for the heartrender, and they weren't doing so badly. Except for Nikolai, who every second checked the face of the dead and if it weren't for Kaz and his cane, he would have been stabbed in the back by now.

"What are you doing?" In a move he would call stupid for the rest of his life, he walked towards the two of them and began to protect the opposite side of the king. "

Zoya... ring." Nikolai looked up for a few seconds and quickly fired at a grisha that was approaching them, barely feeling the slight squeeze he had cause in his heart.

"If you and her weren't the way to my pay… I would have let you get shot in the back of the head, Lantsov." Kaz struck at an otkazat'sya, hitting one of the arms while he dealt with the other, and then the head.

"Remind it to me when we're all safe, everyone."

"I never forget debts." He looked, swinging his cane again as Matthias fired at the same time. "And less about one of a million kruge."

"Nikolai!" Tamar called his name, approaching the group with Tolya. "Weren't you...?"

"Change of plans." The ravkan king answered him, as they hid behind a pile of sacks. "Where do I find Zoya?"

"Down." Tolya was breathing hard, touching his side while holding his sword up with his other hand. "With Genya." He didn't understand anything, and he would have kept thinking about it if the shots and screams hadn't started to sound louder. "They were beating us, thanks for coming. Without Zoya we thought we…"

"Without Zoya?"

"Hey, Inej and Nina are fighting alone." Jesper came up behind them, accompanied by Wylan. He fired before ducking next to them to get a better look at his next target. "Why don't you stop worrying about her for a few minutes and we'll try to get out of here alive? Bomb, Wylan." A large explosion sounded after a few seconds, letting them see how Inej took advantage of the mist and began to use her knives on some opponents. She moved like a gazelle, carefully and covertly; but at the same time with a great speed that didn't allow the path of her daggers to be seen. "Come on, we have to finish this."

It only took Kaz to get up for everyone to follow. And, with the new components in their group, Inej and Nina managed to attack the same person together while the others did the same. Shots, cuts and blows were exchanged between the two sides. But on the contrary, thanks to the lack of grisha and the surprise with the arrival of reinforcements, these were reduced until none were left alive.

"What are you all doing, but without Kaz, in your underwear?" Nina fixed her gaze on them, and Tolya and Tamar did the same; realizing that detail for the first time. "But I'm not complaining to you, Matthias."

"Nina!"

"I'm going to have to teach you new words." Nikolai chuckled a little at the fjerdan's response, but quickly fixed his gaze on the group that had remained on the ship after their departure. "Information for another time. Zoya?"

"She's..." A very loud cry was heard, and Nina quickly pointed to the hatch that led to the storage room. "Genya and Zoya. Downstairs. Storage."

And Nikolai ran there, followed by the others.

—————

You can see the list of fanfics where all the parts of this fanfic are found so far HERE.

[fandomscraziness22]

begonia and edelweiss for kaz/inej!

the way you chose the perfect prompts for these two without even really knowing them!!! impressive! (I changed them up just a tad to fit the idea lol)

begonia (beware) — “just be careful, okay?”

edelweiss (courage, devotion) — “touch them again and i promise, it will be the last thing you ever do.”

Inej has only worked for Kaz Brekker for two months now and has gone on many a job for him in those two months. However, this is the first time she has felt real fear about her situation.

She’s been disarmed thoroughly, the Razorgulls finding the few knives she has on her person with ease. The two bruisers are dragging her towards the meet she knows Kaz is scheduled to be at with their gang; another territory dispute, no doubt. Inej is still getting used to the constant turf wars between the many gangs of Ketterdam, though she knows each one is of vital importance to said gangs.

Inej was supposed to scope out the meeting point beforehand and report back to Kaz, but she hadn’t quite been stealthy enough for the Razorgulls’ new sharpshooter who apparently also had sharp eyes. He had cornered her because Inej had forgotten about the burned-down building along her escape route. It’s just one of many reasons she’s worried about being pushed to this meeting; Kaz won’t be happy she was caught and she is terrified of disappointing him. She’s heard the rumors, seen firsthand what Kaz does to people who aren’t up to snuff.

She doesn’t want that to happen to her.

The Razorgulls finally reach the meeting point, where negotiations are already under way. They shove her to the front of the line as they crow, “Look here, Ajax. We caught ourselves a wayward Dreg.”

Inej straightens, willing herself to not cower as she searches Kaz’s face. He’s as tense as ever, though she sees a flicker of what might be fear cross his face. It surprises her; she didn’t think Kaz Brekker could get scared. 

“Unhand my Wraith,” he rasps.

Ajax clucks his tongue (a dangerous action, Inej thinks) and jabs a finger at Inej. “I sense the terms of engagement have changed, Mr. Brekker. I would like that second harbor space along with those four blocks to the north in exchange for your girl.”

Kaz doesn’t laugh, doesn’t smile, doesn’t say anything. The silence is unnerving to everyone, including Inej. The Dregs are outnumbered here, and she’s weaponless.

Ajax is twitchy, and after a moment, he unsheaths a knife and holds it to Inej’s throat as he says, “I won’t ask again, Brekker. My space for the girl’s life.” Inej’s breath catches, though her eyes don’t leave Kaz.

He stiffens, knuckles tightening on his can. “Touch her again and I promise, it will be the last thing you ever do.” 

Ajax laughs, his grip on Inej and the knife firm. “Like I believe that.”

As soon as the words leave his mouth, a shot rings out. The pressure on Inej’s neck lessens, and she’s able to flinch away from the man as he falls to the ground, blood spilling from the back of his head. She slips away from the Gulls and rejoins the Dregs as Kaz says, “Now. Where were we, again?”

~~~

Inej stays a step behind him, wary of the wrath in his eyes as the Crow Club almost swallows them. “Kaz, I’m sorry,” she says softly.

“I don’t want your apologies,” he spits, cane clicking up the stairs to his room. Inej follows, though all common sense tells her to run from this dangerous man.

But something makes her stay. They’re still in public, with listening ears everywhere and other Dregs who will continue the rumors. Maybe the dressing-down Kaz gives her will be less intense when he’s in his own office.

No other words pass between them as Kaz opens his door and throws off his coat. He leaves the door open, an invitation that she accepts with silent grace.

“We need to get you better self defense skills,” he says as he pulls off his gloves to wash the blood from his arm. “I know you can throw a punch, but you’re normally light on your feet. You need to learn to use that, not just as an escape, but to manipulate the situation at hand.”

Kaz doesn’t look at her, but Inej can see the small glimpse of forgiveness in the offer. He’s disappointed, yes, but he isn’t flaying her alive or sending her back to the Menagerie, so she’ll take it as a win.

“Train with Anika—she’s good and she won’t go easy on you.” Finally, Kaz turns around, gloves back in place. They lock eyes, and a shared understanding passes between them. Inej isn’t sure how they have connected so deeply in such a short amount of time, but she can read his intentions just as clearly as if he’d spoken them. Kaz wants her here; wants her to get better so she can be stronger. He isn’t afraid of her or her skills, and he wants her to cultivate them even more. 

In return, she tells him that she won’t get caught next time, that she’s glad to have a second chance; she won’t give up on him either.

“Be more careful next time, Wraith. I can’t go getting into brawls every time my best spider gets trapped under a glass.”

Inej smiles. “Won’t be a problem, Kaz.” Then she blinks and says, “Though, I will need a new set of knives. Bigger ones, preferably.”

Kaz rolls his eyes, and Inej knows that while Ketterdam may be a mess of a city, all is right with the world in this little room. 

send me a flower prompt!

[anthony-sharma]

Six of Crows Reread - Ch. 20

Chapter 20: Nina

_

“She’d tailored him again just this morning, enduring his glowers and grumbling. No, enjoying them, grateful for the excuse to be near him, ridiculously pleased every time she brought him close to a laugh. Saints, why do I care? Why did one smile from Matthias Helvar feel like fifty from someone else? She’d felt his heart race when she’d tipped his head back to work on his eyes. She’d thought about kissing him. She’d wanted to kiss him, and she was pretty sure he’d been thinking the same thing. Or maybe he was thinking about strangling me again.”

Omg enemies to lovers at its finest! I do wonder, though, how this storyline will work in the context of the show because, as we saw in Helnik’s last scene, they look at each other longingly, Matthias realizing that Nina came for him once more. He didn’t look like someone who hated her, so I don’t know what’s gonna happen between then and the beginning of Six of Crows for both of them to hate each other this much. 

“Every morning he complained that she was impossible to wake.

“It’s like trying to raise a corpse.”

It’s funny how that ends up being her power later on. Leigh really was giving us little, tiny clues all along. 

“Jer molle pe oonet. Enel mörd je nej afva trohem verretn. ” I have been made to protect you. Only in death will I be kept from this oath.”

How does Leigh come up with the most poetic things?? Like??!! And to think that Nina is the one saying this phrase first, which is the one Matthias later tells her?? Dude!!

“I will always be a threat to you, Matthias.”

The corner of his mouth pulled up in a rueful smile. His eyes were almost sorrowful. “I know.”

I love this! It’s like he can’t help but be sad about the fact that because of who they are, they are destined to fight for opposite sides and be enemies. The angst is done so well!!

“You must find a way to make peace,” said Inej. “At least for a while.”

“This is not your concern,” Matthias growled.

Kaz stepped forward, his expression dangerous. “It is very much our concern. And watch your tone.”

So when Helnik snaps at Jesper it’s fine, but when Matthias snaps at Inej, Kaz snaps back, defending her? That’s interesting, Kaz. Your feelings are very much not showing here. 

“She lifted her hands. “How about I crack your skull open like a robin’s egg?”

“You don’t want a look at what’s inside my head, Nina dear.”

I can’t wait to see Kaz throw around terms of endearment like “darling” or “dear”. We see him in the show as being very stern and, although he is, he has very much a sense of humor that we don’t get to see much of in the show, so I can’t wait for them to show it in the spin off. 

“Matthias nodded. “The Fjerdans believe all the world is connected through its waters – the seas, the ice, the rivers and streams, the rain and storms. All feed Djel and are fed by him. When we die, we call it felöt-objer, taking root. We become as roots of the ash tree, drinking from Djel wherever we are laid.”

“Is that why you burn Grisha instead of burying them?”

He paused, then gave a brief nod.

“But you’ll help me lay Nestor and the Squaller to rest here?”

He nodded again.

[...]

She’d stopped then, the truth of their situation returning to her with terrible clarity. She was deep in enemy territory with no allies but a drüskelle who’d thrown her in a cage only a few weeks earlier.

But before she could speak, Matthias had said, “I owe you my life, Nina Zenik. We will get you safely home.”

He really can’t help being decent and I loved that even after years of brainwashing by Brum, his decency didn’t die. Even when she trekked through Fjerda with Nina after they were shipwrecked, it only took him all of 3 weeks to sound and speak freer than before! 

“He knew her well. With every new thing she’d learned of jurda parem, she’d been more certain that the only way to protect Grisha was to end the scientist’s life. She thought of Nestor begging with his last breath for his Shu masters to return. “I can’t bear the thought of my people being slaves,” she admitted. “But we have a debt to settle, Matthias. The pardon is my penance, and I won’t be the person who keeps you from your freedom again.”

I can just imagine how heavy Nina’s burden was when it came to Matthias, and it must have felt horrible for her, for her to want to settle her debt to Matthias instead of protecting Grisha lives by wanting to not let Yul-Bayur live. 

“In those days after the shipwreck, she and Matthias had formed an uneasy truce. What had grown up between them had been something fiercer than affection – an understanding that they were both soldiers, that in another life, they might have been allies instead of enemies. She felt that now.”

This last part of the quote oddly sounds like that last one, after Matthias dies when Leigh writes that both Nina and Matthias were twin souls, destined to be soldiers fighting for opposing sides, and destined to lose each other too quickly. 

Next up, we see what Inej, Kaz, Jesper and Wylan have been discussing while Nina and Matthias were doing their funeral rites for the drugged up Grisha. 

[ell0ra-br3kk3r-writes]

Magic Girl

pairing: kaz brekker x reader

genre: fluff

a/n: italics is a flashback and yes.... i based the reader off of wanda

Magic wasn’t something people came across easily. In fact no one had magic. There was small science, but that is not magic. At least no one was known to have magic. 

Y/N was a crow. And she couldn’t be prouder of her reputation in the Barrel. She earned her rank as second hand to Kaz Brekker. Bastard of the Barrel, Dirtyhands. They told each other everything, mostly because they grew up together. Being childhood friends did help a little bit. You had always known you had powers, and when you met Kaz you shared them with him almost immediately.

He always admired you when you used your powers. He thought you were the most amazing person ever, just the idea of magic flowing through you always blew his mind as a kid. When they were young he started calling her magic girl. 

“I need a nickname for you. An annoying one.” Nine year old Kaz ran up to Y/N and sat down next to her, laying down in the field of golden wheat. She turned her head, “Why an annoying one?” “‘Cause you call me Kazzle Dazzle…” She laughed, “Well it only makes sense! You are my Kazzle Dazzle!” He shoved her shoulder softly, “Shut up. I’ll think of something.” After about thrity minutes of cloud watching he shot up, “I got it!” Y/N sat up, confused, “Got what?” “Your new nickname!” He smirked at her, “Magic girl.” She furrowed her eyebrows and frowned, “I don’t like it…” He smiled triuphantly, “That’s the point!” She shook her head, “No. You are not calling me that.”

And of course it stuck, much to Y/N’s annoyance. 

Growing up and watching you gain more control, he only became prouder of her day by day. Plus now he always had something up his sleeve the rest of Ketterdam didn’t. Y/N.

In order to keep her little secret she had to wear this whole get-up. She wore black leather pants with a red sleeveless shirt with a hood to cover up her face. Kaz also got her red fingerless leather gloves for one of her birthdays to add onto her costume, as he calls it. So that’s how she stood, leaning against a wall since he gave her the roll of look-out. 

Seeing Inej and Wylan running towards her, she straightened up “What? What happened?” Inej shook her head, “We’re outnumbered. Kaz told us to come get you.” Y/N briefly nodded and took off in the direction they came from. Turning the corner she saw Nina, Matthias and Kaz cornered, doing all they could to fend the other gang off. She was surprised to see this amount of people here, normally there would be five to six at max.

Now she saw almost twelve people. One of them shot at Kaz, barely missing him. Y/N snapped into action, raising her hands, red smoke began to form into balls around them. She tilted her hands slightly and smoke began to rise under their feet wrapping itself around their legs in spirals, crawling up until their hands were pinned to their sides. They struggled, trying to get out of the smoke’s grip. She nodded her head behind her signaling the crows to get out of there. They all moved to stand behind her watching proudly.

Kaz watched, his lips curled up into a proud smile as he watched her hands fall into fists and the men crumple to the ground. Dead. Seeing them all fall to the floor instantly, his mouth fell open. Jesper smirked, biting his tongue as he was about to make a snarky remark about Kaz’s reaction.

Y/N turned around and lowered her hood, she moved toward Kaz, “Close your mouth. You’ll catch flies.” She tapped his jaw and kept walking past him as the rest of the group followed. Kaz turned around and watched her as she laughed with Jesper over something he said. He shook his head and walked to catch up with them. 

~

Once they got back to the Slat she rushed up to her room to change. After she changed she walked up to Kaz’s room. They always hung out in his room every night. It was just their thing.

Not knocking, she pushed open the door and made her way to her chair. She smirked at him. He rolled his eyes, not saying anything. “Would I be wrong if I said that my boyfriend was impressed by my little display back there?”

He huffed and scanned over the blueprints on his table. She smiled and rested her chin on her hand leaning on the table, “I impressed you.” She teased in a sing-song voice. He looked up and smiled, “You always impress me,” His smile turned into a smirk, “Magic girl.”

She threw her head back and groaned, “I hate you.” He laughed, “No you don’t. You love me.”

[bey0nd-1he-stars]

Valentine flower - Kaz Brekker

𝑀𝑎𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑙𝑖𝑠𝑡

Pairing: Kaz Brekker x Fem!Reader

Wordcount: 1036

Warning: Slightly OOC!Kaz

Summary: Kaz have never celebrated Valentine’s Day, and he doesn’t see the need of doing something big about it. But Y/N, being as sweet as always, makes sure he at least gets something special. Even if it’s not much.

Kaz had never in his life celebrated Valentines day. Not once. He didn’t really see the point. But now, when he had you, maybe, just maybe, he had something to actually cherish. Y/N, with her h/c h/l hair and e/c eyes. Her comforting aura and smiley personality. At first sight, she was the complete opposite to Kaz. But they fit together like puzzle pieces.

Today when Kaz woke up, a cup of steaming hot coffee stood at his bedside table waiting for him. A blanket was thrown over him and pulled up over his shoulders, something he definitely didn’t recall he’d done himself last night. He smiled softly at the sweet gesture. Y/N of course. She always knew what he needed, even when he didn’t even know himself.

Kaz pushed himself up to sit on the edge of the bed and carefully grabbed the cup of coffee. He wrapped the blanket around his shoulders and carefully sipped the hot liquid. It warmed him up from the inside and left him with a comforting feeling of care and love.

When his cup of coffee was empty he pushed himself off the comfort of his bed. The blanket started to fall from his shoulder but he gripped it and adjusted it to lay around his shoulders again. He gripped his cane and the metal was cold against his pale hand. His gloves were still laying on his desk from yesterday and his coat hung over the back of his chair. There, on the desk, stood also a plate with a stack off waffles. He smiled and shook his head softly. They were still hot when he broke a pice off and put it in his mouth as he sat down behind his desk, gathering all the papers that laid spread out all over the work space.

The next hour he spent sorting all the papers, throwing away those he didn’t need and sorting the rest of them up before putting them in his drawers. Every now and then he’d eat a pice of a waffle that he’d broken off some time between the sorting of papers. When the waffles were finished he decided to take a pause in his work, leave the dishes in the kitchen and see what the others were up to.

He grabbed his cane and took the plate and his empty coffee cup and headed down to the ground floor. At a table in the corner sat Matthias and Nina, eating waffles, drinking hot chocolate and laughing together. On the sofa at the big table, Wylan and Jesper laid in each other’s arms. They were talking quietly, stealing kisses and laughing at each other. Inej was out on a job he’d sent her on and Y/N were outside, Kaz had a faint memory of her telling him last night that she was going to the market and to fifth harbour to check how things were going.

As if on cue, Y/N pushed the door open and walked inside. A few delicate snowflakes rested in her hair and on her shoulders. In her hand she held a bag of what he assumed was some snacks or some other groceries. In her hand she also held a completey black rose. The shimmering petals looked soft as velvet and the thorns were still there, making her hold it between her fingertips carefully.

Kaz met her eyes as she began to walk towards him. It felt like the whole world had stopped and it was just the two of them there. But the slat was still alive. No one was batting them an eye. She stopped in front of him, holding out the beautiful flower to him. A dazzling smile made its way to her lips, a smile he thought he might die to earn again. And it hit him then and there how amazingly beautiful she was. With her damp, y/h/c hair that fell over her shoulders and down her back, covering her collarbones and fell down her chest. Her y/e/c eyes were shining in the dull light from the lit candles.

Kaz reached up and carefully took the elegant flower from the grasp. He slowly twisted it between his fingertips, watching as it turned in his hand. Then he looked up and met her mesmerizing eyes, a small, delicate smile was playing on his lips.

“Thank you,” he spoke softly. He wasn’t used to receiving gifts, especially not flowers. She shrugged, like it was a regular occurrence.

“You’re welcome. I saw it on the market and it reminded me of you. You know, your favorite color and all,” she smiled happily and gave a nod towards the rose he still held in his hand between them.

“It’s not my favorite color, but thank you. Really. It was… sweet of you,” he mumbled and she lifted her eyebrows at him.

“Well, what is your favorite color then? If not black, which may I acknowledge, is the color you wear every single day,” she wondered, a challenging smirk playing on her lips. They started to walk towards the stairs together, and Kaz gazed at her for a moment.

“I don’t have one,” he then replied. She rolled her eyes at him but didn’t stop smiling lovingly at him.

“Of course you don’t, why’d I even ask,” she said jokingly. She softly nudged him with her shoulder and he looked down at her, smiling softly. He shook his head at her before turning his gaze forward and starting to climb the stairs. They were quiet until they reached Y/N’s door and they both stopped outside of it for a moment. Y/N pushed the door open and stepped inside, leaving the door open behind her. Kaz watched as she stepped inside and placed her bag from the market on the edge of the bed. She shrugged her coat off and threw it on the bed beside the bag before turning around meeting Kaz’s eyes.

Before she shut the door behind her Kaz spoke up.

“I don’t have a favorite color,” he spoke softly, holding his gaze on the rose in his hand. Then he looked up and met her eyes again,”but I do like the color of your eyes.”