#M preg

[frosty-tian]

Free-handed a comic for my mental health before trying to sleep again.

Bonus.:

[wormchamp72]

Thoughts on m preg jtk?

See, this is a topic that calls for a very nuanced discussion due 2 the sensitive of mpreg, especially in relation 2 Jeff the Killer.

Who impregnated Jeff the Killer? I find that this is a very important thing 2 consider because the father (or mother or non-binary parent) could really influence the decision. Are they a dead beat? Would they divorce but pay child support? Or would they and Jeff the Killer live life as a happily married couple? I personally would only want Jeff 2 have a child with someone who is always there 2 love and support him.

Did Jeff WANT this pregnancy? The Worm is a firm believer in the mantra "My body, my choice," and this naturally applies 2 mpreg JTK. I believe that he should be able 2 get an abortion if he so chooses, regardless of if his partner OR the author wishes for him 2 go through with it. It's Jeff the Killer's body, godd@mn 1t, and it's HIS choice.

Now, I personally believe that bringing any child in2 this 3ffed up world is morally reprehensible (RE: my parents. Mother is currently pregnant and STILL refuses 2 see the light on abortion), and Jeff would naturally believe the same.

In conclusion, before you write an mpreg Jeff the Killer fic, ask yourself: Is this what Jeff would want?

[mxmorbidmidnight]

I get ten men pregnant a year. Except for 09’ that was an outlier and the additional 45 should not be considered as part of the equation.

[maegorsbignaturals]

MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!! MPREG MAEGOR HEADCANONS, PLEASE!!!

-You know that one theory that says Visenya was pregnant thanks to a blood ritual? Yeah, that's how Maegor ended up pregnant. He tought that it would make one of his wives pregnant, but he didn't readed the small letters where it said that the cojurer IS the one that is going to get pregnant.

-Like there is just a FEW people that knows that he is gravid with a baby. Tyanna is one of them, Visenya too (she wanted to SLAP Maegor in the face after she knew what he did), The Lord Commander of the kingsguard and that's all. He waits for a few months until the baby bump is visible for him to move to Dragonstone under the excuse of being a bit sick and to need the """"refreshing airs"""" of Dragonstone's mountains and shores.

-Basically has to be dragged to bed because he is not able to stop moving. Visenya has forbidden him to go in the trainning yard, to stay late hpurs of the night planning how to stop the faith, how to lift the realm from economic ruin, to hunt down Alyssa, Alyssane, Jaehaerys and Rhaena. The first trimester was a hell for him, and it didn't got better when he began to get bigger and his feets began to bloat.

-Nobody expected him to actually produce milk for the baby, not even him Yet, when he actually began to leak everyone sighed in relief. They would not need a wetnurse and one person less would not need to know of the... odd situation of it (And less blood would be spilled, what? you actually tought Maegor would let alive a wetnurse that knows that the king is pregnant??? Don't be ridiculous!!!)

-But even if the heir matter was practically solutiones, a new one arised: who was going to be the mother of this bby? There is no way that Maegor would openly admit that he was pregnant and that he got pregnant via Valyrian magic. So, he would actually say that one of his three wifes was the mother, but who??? Being a Queen Mother was not easy work, and it held such a great deal of power to be one. Giving the title of Queen Mother was a gift and a political move on itself to a woman who did not suffered the consequences of a pregnancy, so who would it be??? Tyanna, who has demostrated to be useful for him and had served him well? Alys, who was ready to go to exile with him? or ceryse, who was the niece of the high septon and the daughter of Lord Manfred Hightower???

-He hates physical touch. He scowls and grunts when Visenya tries to rubb his belly or when the Maester of Dragonstone tries to check on him. But he loves hot baths!! The ones where the water is boiling and leaves the skin all red! The Maester thinks it is not healthy for him and the baby, but he does not care.

-He is reticient to actually think of a future with the baby, like baby names and clothes and dcraddles. He thinks that a woman is the one to think of those things, and yet...

[lark-the-lurking-eyeball]

My new otp

[duffsmckagan]

The Joys of Pregnancy

Summery: Lars gets Kirk pregnant.

Notes: Cliff is alive in this. He and Corinne had a baby so he's helping her with their newborn son. While he's out Jason is temporally taking his place. He pops up every now and then.

Warnings: Alcohol (It's Metallica! Don't worry Kirk doesn't drink in this), swearing, James is sort of bitter

The day started out as normal. James, Lars, Kirk, and Jason had just got done playing a show. They were back stage wearing robes and towels drinking beer. James was surrounded by girls, girls, girls. Lars and Jason were sitting together.

Jason: That was so fucking awesome. I LOVE playing in front of a large audience. I think the audience is starting to warm up to me. Lars: (Takes a sip of his beer) Yeah, they don't throw beer cans at you anymore, or yell out Cliffs name. Jason: (Sheds a happy tear) They see me as one of you guys.

Lars and Jason notice Kirk getting another beer from the cooler. Lars just couldn't help but stare at him in awe. Even drenched in sweat, he still found Kirk very, very beautiful. Jason notices this. Jason has always been a Klars shipper since he became their #1 fan. Jason is starts to smirk. Lars notices this.

Lars: Hey, um, why are you giving me that look? Jason: You LOVE him, don't you? Lars: Yes I do. Jason: You need to get your man pregnant. Lars: Um, that would be nice, but impossible. Jason: (Makes a rainbow with his hands) Not with the power of M!preg. Besides, we're in a fanfic, anything is possible buddy. Lars: You know what Jason, you're right. I'll talk to him tonight. I mean we been having baby fever recently.

Kirk walks over to Lars and Jason.

Kirk: Hey guys, what's up? What are you talking about.

Lars has a visible thinking bubble that reads "I'm going to get him pregnant."

Jason: (Whispers) Dude, your thoughts are visible. Kirk: Woah (Blushes) Lars: Ah, shit.

Later that night, Kirk and Lars were in their hotel room. They have the fanciest and coolest hotel room. Lars is massaging Kirk's shoulders.

Kirk: So, uh, Lars...I have something to ask you? Lars: Yes. Kirk: Do you really want to have a baby with me? Lars: Yes I do especially lately. I've been having strong baby fever. I have been thinking "What if me and my man started a family?" Kirk: Wow. I've been thinking the same thing. I've even had dreams about it. Jason said we'd make cute babies. Lars: Huh? He did didn't he? Kirk: Is it a great idea to have one now, though? I mean with touring for the album MOP. Lars: It's okay, babe. My family will support us. Kirk: Cool.

Lars and Kirk start kissing. The scene switches to Jason who is wearing black pajamas with a matching hat hearing awkward noises from Kirks/Lars room AND James room.

2 weeks later James and Jason were sitting on the couch watching TV. James is watching some hunting show and drinking his beer. Jason is watching with him.

Jason: So, how's the weather? James: SHH! They're getting to the best part.

Kirk and Lars come out to the living room and stand right in front of the TV. James is moving his head.

James: Can you two move. The best part is coming up.

Kirk and Lars look like they're about to explode with excitement.

Lars: James, buddy, this is way more important. James: Ok, what do you two have to tell us? Jason: Yeah, you two have some very exciting news. Lars: Well.... Kirk: Duh! (Points to his not really visible baby bump) we're going to be having a baby here.

James starts laughing hard. He's the only one laughing.

James: (Wipes away a tear) Ok, you guys are hilarious. Ok, now get out of the way so I and Jason can keep watching TV. Lars: Um, this isn't a joke. Kirk is pregnant. Kirk: (Holds up 3 positive pregnancy tests) Yep!

Jason's face gleams with pure happiness. James spits out his beer all over Jason.

Jason: That was my face, you dick.

James: WHAT IN THE ACTUAL- HOW?! Lars: (Shrugs) Don't know, but it happened.

Jason hugs both Kirk and Lars.

Jason: This is awesome. I'm going to be a uncle! Isn't this awesome James?

James doesn't answer because he still couldn't believe it.

Kirk gags and barfs purple goop (Barf) onto the rug.

Lars: Um, sorry guys, Kirk is experiencing morning sickness. Jason: No problem. James: (Groans) So, how long is this going to last? Kirk: Nine months (gags again)

Jason threw a a party for the exciting news. Friends of the band and family are there. Megadeth, Anthrax, Slayer, and Guns N' Roses are there. Mrs. and Mr. Ulrich (Torben and Lone) and Mrs. Hammett (Chefela) are there. Kirks siblings (Rick and Jennifer) are also there. There is a lot of food.

Lars and Kirk are surrounded by family and friends. James is all by himself drinking a beer (his third) all alone in the corner somewhat bitter and confused. Cliff notices this and walks over to check on his pal.

Cliff: Are you alright, dude? James: I'm fine. Cliff: No you're not. You're not taking this very well. Look, I know this is weird, but look how happy they are. Why don't you set aside your views and be there for our drummer and our guitarist. James: Yeah, I don't know if I can do that. Cliff: (Sighs) Look on the bright side. You're going to be an amazing uncle. James: (Somewhat smiles) Yeah, I guess.

𝓜𝓸𝓷𝓽𝓱 𝓞𝓷𝓮

The first month sort of sucked. The symptoms Kirk has are sensitivity to certain smells, weird food cravings, fatigue, mood swings, increased urination, headaches and morning sickness.

The band were playing a show. Lars is a beast on the drums, James is doing a solo along with Kirk. Jason is having fun playing his bass. James and Kirk are looking at each other smiling. You know, maybe this pregnancy thing isn't so bad....

Suddenly Kirk gags and barfs purple goop (barf) all over James's crappy shoes. James is instantly pissed. The crowd is laughing.

Kirk: Shit. Sorry, dude. James: (Utterly seething)

They did another show. This time Kirk and Jason are together smiling at each other. Kirk gags yet again, and barfs purple goop all over Jason's cool shirt.

Jason: Aww man. Kirk: Shit. Sorry, man.

James and Lars laugh at Jason.

James: Thank fuck it wasn't me this time.

On some other day Lars took them to a restaurant called Porkies Pizza. Rob and Cliff are also invited.

Rob: So, guys I heard about the news. Congrats! Lars: Thank you, Rob. Kirk: Thank you! Cliff: You two will make awesome parents! Jason: (Looking at the menu) Oh man! They have my favorite wine here! James: Nice! Kirk: Sorry guys! I have to go take a leak! I'll be right back.

Kirk zooms to the bathroom. A few minutes later he was back out about to sit next to his hubby when suddenly....

Kirk: Oh! Wait! Still got to go!

Kirk zooms back to the bathroom. a few minutes later he comes back. This at least repeats itself 6 more times before finally sitting down.

Lars: Your pasta is getting cold, dear. Jason: (Chuckles) His THIRD helping of pasta.

A few days later Kirk really had some strong cravings. He ate James's dessert, which was a chocolate cream pie.

James: YOU ATE MY PIE!? Kirk: (Burps loudly) Yep. Best fucking pie I've ever had. James: (Turns to Lars) Has it been nine months yet? Lars: No. It's only been a few days. James: (Mumbles to himself) We should've kept Dave.

Then there was the headaches. Kirk is reading some horror books. Lars is sitting next to him reading a metal magazine. Jason is making too much noise.

Kirk: WILL YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP?! I have a headache! Go somewhere else to make annoying noises!

Jason leaves the room quickly.

𝓜𝓸𝓷𝓽𝓱 𝓣𝓱𝓻𝓮𝓮

At 3 months Kirk notices that his hair is thicker. Also, his butt got bigger.

Lars: Wow, your hair is really pretty. It's always pretty, but it looks extra pretty today. Kirk: Thank you.

𝓜𝓸𝓷𝓽𝓱 𝓕𝓸𝓾𝓻

At 4 months Kirk is dealing with stretch marks, sensitive teeth and gums, bloating, fatigue, and constipation.

James, Lars, and Jason are just watching TV. Kirk enters the room with his noticeable baby bump and a guitar in his left hand. In his right hand he has a cup of water. He's all happy.

Kirk: Isn't it a wonderful day? I'm so happy, I want to sing a song for all of you. James: Don't do that. Your singing voice is useless. Kirk: (Suddenly sad) You think my singing is terrible? (Starts bawling) you said I could sing on the next album. Lars: James! James: (Lies) What? No. I was just joking, Kirky. You have the voice of an angel. Much better than Vince Neil's that's for sure. Kirk: (Suddenly angry and shouting) DON'T YOU CALL ME KIRKY! ONLY LARS GETS TO CALL ME KIRKY, GOT IT?!

Kirk throws his water. It's meant to hit James, but the water hits Jason instead.

James: (Gulps) Yeah, got it. Kirk: (Instantly happy) Ok. (Gags)

Kirk barfs purple goop onto Jason's shoes.

Jason: Aw, not again.

𝓜𝓸𝓷𝓽𝓱 𝓕𝓲𝓿𝓮

At 5 months Kirk is dealing with lower back pain, insomnia, baby brain, and swollen feet.

Kirk: Where is my guitar? Jason: (Points to Kirk's left hand) It's in your left hand. Kirk: Oh, thank you, Jason. You rock. Jason: No problem. How's the pregnancy so far? Kirk: Oh where do I start? I can't sleep, my feet and ankles are killing me, my back also, I have to piss every 20 seconds, I'm back up, always hungry, sometimes dizzy, my skin itches (itches his right arm), and I really want to bonk James on the head. Jason: Shit. That all sucks. At least in 4 months the baby will be out soon. Now why do you want to bonk James on the head? Kirk: He still hasn't accepted that me and Lars are a thing. I don't know if its jealousy, homophobia, or both. Jason: I'm sure he'll come around. Kirk: It's been five months Jason. I doubt it.

𝓜𝓸𝓷𝓽𝓱 𝓢𝓲𝔁

At 6 months Kirk experiences hot flashes, hemorrhoids, frequent fetal movements, and increased appetite.

James comes out from the back freezing his ass off.

James: (Shivering) Why is it so damn cold in here?! Lars: Kirk is having hot flashes.

There are 4 small fans in front of Kirk and a huge one right next to him. He has a hand fan in his right hand. He's sweating.

Kirk: (Using a hand fan) This isn't helping.

Jason comes into the room (wearing a heavy black coat, gloves, and hat) with a jar of cookies.

Jason: I just made these. Anybody want any?

Before anyone else could say anything Kirk snatches the jar right out of his hands and devours them.

Kirk: Lars poo, I can feel the baby (feels another fetal movement) or babies kick. Lars: (Gleams with happiness) Really?! That's amazing.

Lars goes over to his hubby and lays his head on Kirk's stomach.

Lars: I can feel them. Our tiny sons or daughters may be soccer players. Kirk: (Chuckles) Jason: Oh! I want to feel the babies kicks. Kirk: Ok. They really are kicking. I can feel it.

Jason goes over to Kirk. At the moment there's no kicking.

Jason: I don't feel anythin-

The baby strongly kicks, it knocks Jason on his ass.

Kirk: (Holds his stomach) Woah. Jason: ?! Lars: Future soccer players it is.

James, Lars, and Jason are watching TV. They're watching Guns N' Roses on MTV. Kirk comes down from upstairs with a comfy pillow. He places it next to Lars and James and sits on it.

Lars: Hey babe Kirk: Hey Lars-poo

They both share a kiss much to James's dismay.

James: (Raises an eyebrow) What's the pillow for? The couch is already as comfy as it gets. Kirk: Hemorrhoids. James: Oh. Those are a bitch.

A few minutes pass. James sniffs and makes a face.

James: Alright, who did that? (Makes eye contact with Kirk)

It's obvious who did it.

Kirk: (Points to Jason, who is next to James)

James gives Jason a judgmental stare.

Jason: What?

One thing I forgot to mention are insecurities.

Kirk: (Holding his stomach) Do you think I look bad? Lars: Not at all, love, you look fa- Kirk: WERE YOU GOING TO SAY I LOOK "FAT"?! Lars: U-um, no I was going to say fantastic.

𝓜𝓸𝓷𝓽𝓱 𝓢𝓮𝓿𝓮𝓷

Month seven. Almost there. Kirk is now dealing with strong frequent fetal movements, frequent urination, back pain, shortness of breath, stretch marks, swelling in the ankles/legs/feet.

Kirk is playing guitar in what's supposed to be the workout room.

Kirk: (Talking to his babies) I sure hope you all share my love of playing guitar. I also hope you share your dads love of playing drums. Who knows, maybe you'll be better than your dad (laughs).

Suddenly he has to pee really bad. He drops his guitar (a expensive gift from Slash) and runs to the nearest bathroom. There's 3. Unfortunately, James, Jason, and Lars were all using them. That didn't matter. Kirk breaks down the door to the upstairs bathroom. Jason was occupying it. He is brushing his teeth and combing his beautiful hair.

Jason: What the- Kirk: MOVE!

Lars and Kirk decided to go for a walk. They started to brainstorm baby names.

Lars: I am thinking Myles for a boy. Kirk: (Looks at his stomach) With how "big" I am and with all the movements I feel, I think we're having twins, or even triplets. I think we're having twins. I choose Angelique for our daughter. The name Myles for our son isn't a bad choice. I recommend at least one of their middle names be Kainalu. Lars: Hmmm, I like that. Myles and Angelique it is. Kirk: (Winded) How long do we have to keep walking? My feet are fucking killing me. Lars: Uh, we can stop if you want? There's a nearby vegetarian taco place- Kirk: Yes, can we stop there? Lars: Yes we can.

𝓜𝓸𝓷𝓽𝓱 𝓔𝓲𝓰𝓱𝓽

Month eight. ALMOST there. Kirk is now experiencing breast leaks, heartburn, varicose veins, Braxton hicks contractions, pelvic pressure, bleeding gums, constipation, cramping, difficulty sleeping, backache, and clumsiness.

Kirk and Lars are in their bed that they share together. Kirk is WIDE awake. Lars is passed out snoring loudly.

Kirk: (Talking to himself) This will all be worth it. Soon you'll be out of me. Soon this will be over.

𝓜𝓸𝓷𝓽𝓱 𝓝𝓲𝓷𝓮

FINALLY! The final and last month. Kirk feels hot and the contractions are much more common. He is big too. It's obvious he's going to have more than 1 baby.

One day Kirk and Lars are in their room. Lars is rubbing Kirk's stomach.

Lars: I can't wait! Kirk: Me too. I'm so stoked! All the fun things we'll all do together as a family. Lars: Plus, we can start playing again.

In the kitchen James is eating a steak, fries, and a beer. Jason enters the kitchen. He walks over to the fridge, grabs a sandwich, and joins James.

James: Hey, Jason. Jason: Hey James! Are you excited? James: Excited for what? Jason: Myles and Angelique will be here any day now.

James realizes what Jason is talking about.

James: Yeah! I can't wait. Want to know why? So we can start playing and we won't have to deal with Kirk's mood swings, throwing us out of the bathroom, or barfing. Jason: Yeah that all sucks, but it's what happens. You'll be happy when two new people come into this world. James: Well, yeah. I wonder if any of them will become a drummer, or a guitarist...

One day Kirk is outside. Not sure what he is doing, but he's in the front yard. Suddenly he feels bad pain. He collapses onto the ground.

Kirk: L-LARS HELP!

Lars, Jason, and James come rushing outside.

Jason: What's going on? Kirk: I think the baby is coming! C-call an ambulance!

Lars: On it, baby!

Lars runs into the house and dials 9-1-1 on the phone

Lars: Hello! I need an ambulance! My husband is going to have a baby.

The scene switches to the band in the hospital. The bright blank white light shined in Kirks face as he was situated in the sea green sheets, his feet propped up against metal stir ups.

Kirk: This is THE WORST! Lars: Baby, you're going to be ok. Just relax. Just take deep breathes- Kirk: RELAX?! RELAX?! Easy for you to say! Did you happen to forget that YOU did this to me?! Next time I'm throwing you off of ME! Lars: You were the one topping!

Kirk screamed ignoring everyone else in the room. Another contraction hit, forcing Kirk to lunge almost completely across the bed.

James: Wow, you look like you're in a lot of pain. Kirk: NO SHIT SHERLOCK!

The doctor finally came in. It's Ron, the original bassist for Metallica. James and Lars's eyes widened.

Doctor Ron: Hey, Kirk. Let see what we got here. Hey James, hey lars, long time no see. James: (Waves without making eye contact) Lars: Um, Hi Ron.

Doctor Ron looks between Kirk's legs.

Doctor Ron: Ok, you're 4cm dilated. You'll need to hang on a little longer. Relax. Kirk: (Tears run down his face) Why did I think this was a great idea? James: (Shrugs) Well-

Kirk shoots him a death glare. He's not in the mood for salty homophobic insults, or any insults of that matter.

Kirk: Can't the baby be born now? I'm in so much pain and am burning up here (A strong contraction hits) FUCK! Lars: He, she, or they will come out when they're ready. Don't rush the process, love. Kirk: But I want them out NOW! Lars: That'd be nice, but you need patience. Jason: (Plays Patience by Guns N' Roses on his boombox) Lars: Nice boombox, Jason. James: Put that away, boy. Kirk: But it's been THIRTEEN hours! How much longer does this take?! Jason: It can take up to 48 hours- Kirk: WHAT?! ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?! Lars: Shut up, Jason. Jason: Sorry. Doctor Ron: Ok, you're up to 6 cm. Just a little longer and you'll be ready to push. Kirk: Ok (Takes a deep breath) T-this w-will all be worth it when my sweet daughter, or amazing son show up.

After so many hours, the same cycle repeated itself. The contractions were getting stronger and more painful. Each time that happened Kirk would try to hug Lars before his stomach kept cramping.

Many more hours went by. By now Kirk is ready to give birth.

Doctor Ron: Good news, Kirk! Your cervix is dilated 10cm! We can go ahead and begin pushing now when you're ready. Kirk: (Weakly nods) Yes, finally. I'm so ready for these babies to be out of me.

Kirk holds onto both Lars's and Jason's hands. Kirk waited for the next contraction to hit.

Lars: Honey, just relax and focus on your breathing.

Kirk began to push, screaming almost immediately after trying. He felt like his insides were being torn to shreds while his body is being set on fire. More tears escaped as the contraction ended, trying to catch his breath.

Doctor Ron: You're doing great, Kirk. I can see the head. Keep going! Lars: You got this, baby!

After so much screaming and pushing one baby is born, a boy.

Doctor Ron: Congratulations! It's a baby boy.

Doctor Ron hands the baby to the nurse.

Doctor Ron: Oh, wait, we're not done yet. Kirk: OH COME ON!

After MORE pushing, all of Kirk's babies were born. 6 in total. 3 girls and 3 boys.

Orion Thadeus Ulrich-Hammett Angelique Kiana Ulrich-Hammett Myles Keala Ulrich-Hammett Kimberley Kakalina Ulrich-Hammett Layne Kainalu Ulrich-Hammett Violette Kiana Ulrich-Hammett

6 nurses held each baby.

Mr. Ulrich: Woah! Mrs. Ulrich: (Starts crying happy tears) Mrs. Hammett: (Happily Gasps) Oh my. Cliff: Woah. Corinne: Awww. They're so cute. (Whispers to Cliff) They take after Lars.

Lars: (Eyes start to water) Can I hold two of them?

A nurse gives him two of the sextuplets.

Lars: Kirk, want to hold our babies?

Kirk is so tired he didn't want to at the moment. A nurse tries to give him two of the babies, who were crying.

Kirk: (Whispers) Divas don't cry.

Two of the babies stopped crying. Lars, James, and Jason are all in shock. He held onto both of them.

Kirk: Hey there...(squints his eyes) hold on.....

Kirk looks at lars, then at the babies, then Lars again, and then right back at his babies.

Kirk: 9 months inside me. 48 hours of pain and suffering and you two come out looking like your father. Lars: Oh wow look at that. I guess the Ulrich genes dominate. Kirk: I hope you get my hair. I at least want one of you to look like your beautiful father, me.

A nurse comes up to Kirk.

Nurse: I'll be giving you a uterus massage. Kirk: Oh, that sounds nice. Nurse: It's really not. Kirk: Ah, shit.

While Kirk is screaming everyone were showering the 6 newborn sextuplets with love, even James.

THE END

[f4t1m4st4r2008]

ayuda XD

[judith-works]

Preeeeñaron¡ preñaroon a un inocente¡

Not Sorry

[kharmii]

Maybe Marchy wants you to delete their post because they don't want to be affiliated with you, specifically. You're sort of a trash human being who can't get past werewolves being fictional creatures who have been a part of human mythology for thousands of years. Oh, and you're also transphobic and borderline homophobic. No one seems to like you, Kharm. Take a hint and keep your opinions to yourself for a change.

I haven't seen werewolf pron in a long time because all the people into it blocked me before I had a chance to block them. Srsly tho, there is no fandom as thirsty for dog-ass as submas. Beautiful men = Out of Style. Grotesque hairy stank-factories = In Style.

I don't like a lot of you either. I'd have been over this fandom ages ago if I wasn't into making dubious translations of Asian art. It's not like I'd want to go diving head first into My Hero Academia either, as it's mostly a bunch of kids. I suppose Erasurehead x Present Mike is appealing in the 'opposites attract' sort of way, but I'm not into Endeavor x Hawks because the former is too much of an alpha male. A main plot point was how Endeavor got into an arranged marriage with a once influential family that was struggling. They sold their daughter to Endeavor so he could selectively breed perfect superhero babies.

Endeavor: *taps watch* My recovery time is twenty minutes. That's how often you are getting bred until that baby sticks. After that, we could go once an hour for fun. (My goddamn #1 hero)

Anyway, nobody has yet to answer my question about why it's acceptable in fandom to be a shitting dick nipple fkn furry into a million stupid fetishes, yet a lot of those people still have the gall to have a 'Proshippers DNI' on their pages. Why is it okay to cherry pick the two things? (Pedophilia/Incest) but it's okay to belong to a group of people (furries) who are overrepresented in irl cases of sexual abuse? Why is one sort of weirdo more socially acceptable than another?

Side note: A lot of furries I've encountered are into belly kink. You know how they are always saying yaoi is offensive to irl gay men because woman pidgeonhole gay men into heteronormative female fantasies? Well, first of all, fuck gay men and men in general. It's part of male privilege that all biological males -whether straight gay or trans- have this attitude like their feelings are of utmost importance, and that they should be allowed to regulate what we do. If gay men don't like my gay men fantasies, then fight me.

Where was I....so belly kink is a very heteronormative feminine fantasy. It's a very female fantasy to want to see a feminine looking person being comforted by their masculine partner when they are suffering with a huge swollen pregnant looking belly. I can see the appeal of it if the person with the fat belly is pretty looking, like the Dabiten ship. Unfortunately, I too often saw depictions of this featuring gross ass furries that one could just imagine the stank lines wafting out of.

Another side note: Is there the same sort of crap in other fandoms one sees in submas? -Like does every other fandom get flooded with two-dick dragon morbidly obese omegaverse bullshit? I'll say it again because I have the right to my opinion....I'll bet a lot of monster fkn bullshit is trans coded, like they want to normalize fat hairy men with vaginas and/or dubious genitals (like multiple dicks, yo..) looking pregnant. It's yet another side effect of our fossil fuel driven glut where too many people have amygdales not functioning correctly which causes dysfunction with dopamine regulation. A person with a healthy sense of their own mortality would be repulsed by pregnant trans male figures because of the potential of getting a really messed up baby.

Seriously, doctors are supposed to experiment on animals before moving to humans. How many female animals were pumped with male hormones then made pregnant? Have there been a lot of studies done on what unnatural male hormones might do to a developing baby in the womb? -Or are we in the midst of ongoing legal experimentation on humans?

[frosty-tian]

Warning, talking/thinking about mech-preg underneath.:

Okay okay, so woke up not too long ago and saw a post talking about mech-preg bad and that’a understandable, got me thinking.

(I’m still sticking with what I have at the moment because it appeals to me the most personally (and because I like to associate Cybertronians with some insect-like features (albeit need to show that more). Though thoughts of external insemination (while involving an egg) is way too much for me. For now.)

Does make me think how I could make it more ‘alien-like’ for hybrid babies/sparklings. Boulder and Graham (because main pairing) could build a baby I guess. Though a pal/mutual did talk about creating a baby artificially (be a test-tube baby that’s literally incubated in an external incubator). Hmmm…

Like I can easily think of ways to make it a lot less human if between two Cybertronians that live on Cybertron (I’ve also heard of adopting sparklings from hot-spots, that’s a good concept), but realised it would be a lot challenging if a human is involved. But hey, sometimes I like a good challenge.

[weirdships000]

What do we think of m-preg? I'm thinking of writing a Zane x Gene m-preg fic but I want to know what my followers would think.

[blackkatdraws2]

[ORV] happy Han Myungoh before I explore (my interpretation of) his trauma ^_^

[CONTENT WARNING: Body Horror / Gore underneath]

Han Myungoh had to save his daughter in exchange for her freedom and his humanity

Han Myungoh did try killing the baby before it was born, but he changed his mind later and gave birth to Han Dareum and loved her. SOURCE: Chapter 251: Episode 47 – Demon King Selection (5)

Still, it must've been scary living his entirely life as a straight cis man then suddenly being hit with the fear of pregnancy, having to experience what it's like to have a living being growing inside you. (Even if not physically, since: 1. The specifics never got told in the novel 2. Han Dareum is a curse 3. Han Myungoh himself said he "give birth from the heart.")

[autobot2001]

Rare Pairing Fest 6; Afterlife

Pairing: Bayverse Crosshairs and Drift Description: Drift is dead, and Crosshairs finds out he's sparked. All this time, Drift watches from the afterlife until he can visit Crosshairs one night. Warning; talk of abortion/ termination ***This is now another idea for a story I'll eventually get to***

Crosshairs stares at the headstone in disbelief. This has to be a nightmare. Crosshairs repeats to himself. Someone wake me up. Crosshairs didn't want to go to the funeral, but friends believed he'd regret it even though, right now, his spark aches more than before the funeral. No one knows that he and Drift had a little fun a few weeks ago. Crosshairs isn't sure if he wants to be sparked or would feel more disappointed if he's not. He could have a mini Drift, which could bring joy, sadness, or both.

Drift watches from the afterlife. Hating the pain Crosshairs is in. He knows Crosshairs isn't sure if he wants to be sparked now that he's gone. Drift isn't sure if he wants to watch Crosshairs endure the pain of being a single carrier, but he believes the sparkling will eventually bring him happiness.

Crosshairs is in no mood to do anything. He wants to be left alone and barely drinks energon. He doesn't tell anybot he's had nightmares about Drift being killed. With the depression, Crosshairs is tired by the end of the day and can't avoid recharging. "Drift!" Crosshairs calls out. He rubs across the battlefield, avoiding blasts from all around him. He's more worried about why Drift isn't answering him.

Crosshairs finally finds Drift. He stares horrified. Drift is severely damaged. He lost an arm and leg. Bleeding energon heavily from the two missing limbs, cuts, and gunshot wounds. "Drift!" "C-Crosshairs?" Crosshairs knows Drift has seconds before offlining. "Shh, I'm here.* "I'm sorry I —." "Don't say anything." "I love you.' Drift offlines. "Drift!" Crosshairs yells to the sky. Crosshairs wakes up, terrified. As always, he looks next to him and remembers this nightmare isn't what he fears but what happened. He cries himself into recharge.

This time, when Crosshairs wakes up in the morning, he feels sick. He rushes to the toilet to throw up. He's pretty sure he's not sick. I need to see Ratchet, but… Crosshairs thinks.

Drift watches Crosshairs, uncertain how to feel. He knows Crosshairs is going to be unhappy with the news at first. Hating he can't do anything from the afterlife.

"Well, there's bad news and worse news," Ratchet says, looking at his datapad. "How is there bad and worse news!" "Well, it's not good. Your energon level is low, and I'm sure the last thing you want is to be sparked. So I assume I don't need to ask—." "What the frag is wrong with you?! I know as a medic, you're supposed to ask, not assume! And no, I will not terminate!" "Crosshairs, you do realize this sparkling could look like Drift? Have more of Drift's personality?" "I know. I know I will have many days hating he's not here to meet this little one and watch them grow up, but I can't terminate. This little one didn't ask for their sire to be killed before they're detectable." "Then I strongly suggest talking to Rung at least once a week. I'm only detecting a spark. You know, the spark can spill at this stage, and you'll be carrying twins." "I don't care. Bring up termination again, and I'll see to it your medical career is terminated!" Crosshairs leaves the room, furious. Ignoring Ratchet's demand that he return for an energon infusion.

Crosshairs sits on his berth and cries. "I…I am happy to be carrying, but…I can't do this without you, Drift," Crosshairs sobs. The light in the room turns off. Crosshairs isn't sure what to think while seeing a glowing white orb. He watches the orb change form but can't believe what he sees. "D-Drift?" The figure smiles. "I love you, Crosshairs, and our little one." "I can't terminate, but I can't do this without you." Drift moves in front of Crosshairs "I'll always be here." He kisses Crosshairs before vanishing. Crosshairs isn't sure if he was hallucinating from low energon or not. If you did visit, I hope you can more often, Drift. Crosshairs thinks. I guess the sparkling has a guardian angel.

[mrteaspill]

Drew some M(itosis)preg AU Doodles at Uni!!

(Imagine this is a timeline where Garp didnt know he can 'give birth')

Sengoku & Tsuru: Please, don't hold your baby like that Garp.

Tsuru wants to make sure Garp feels how she and Sengoku felt around him (Garp always drives them crazy, so now its their turn for payback)(little did they know, that exact baby is gonna cause so much trouble for the world)

Quick father-son nap /(>×<)\

To Rayleighs dismay, in a decade and half, hes tasked with raising not one, but TWO babies lol.

He also got it wrong about Garp. Garp didnt pull noone, he only gave birth🤷‍♂️

Just the sons being adorable😙✨️

[f4t1m4st4r2008]

random thing