#MIB Skeletons

[unidentifiedfluffyobject]

Not me going out of my way to world build <_<

Agent Slim and Agent Stout

[flight-to-mars]

[garblixdligzoog]

[BREAKING NEWS]

Good evening, and welcome to Universal Federation News.

After nearly 8 earth years, it is sad to say that our beloved red planet, mars has finally been taken over by the Gnarpian Race.

Dozens were lost in this territorial war, but it seems that they had the upper hand with technology too advanced to keep up with. Since it's founding in 2017, under a declaration by [CENSORED], they have been keeping us safe from invaders for who knows how long.

Gnarpian Emperor Zorg had this to say:

"AND I'M COMING FOR YOU ZORPY EARTHLINGZ AZ WELL! AND AZ A MATTER OF FACT, YOU-"

Due to the further expletive words of Emperor Zorg, we have not chosen to show anymore footage.

"*GASP* THEY DARE CENZOR THE WORDZ OF EMPEROR ZORG!?"

In other news, mysterious creature spotted in Two Stud Camp, coincidently after camp councilor, fr-

"That'z enough of that! Thank Flogzor for my zkillz in electronicz. Thiz camp lookz amazing... Enough fruit to lazt me a while! Time to play the waiting game..."

It looks like Garby is relaxing by the waters of the Oasis, eating watermelon and drinking mango juice... alongside skeletons of MIB who are strewn about the oasis with futuristic technology and a tent covering xis UFO...

[spaceintruderdetector]

In the late 1960s, two legendary Fortean researchers, Gray Barker and John Keel, were came to my neighborhood in the Kanawha Valley to investigate the strange sightings there of birdmen, MIB, and UFOs. As Gray described in his book The Silver Bridge, they visited our hamlet of Mound, WV (now called North Charleston) while looking into the Tad Jones UFO sighting. Mound was once the location of a Shawnee Indian settlement with thousands of burial mounds. Since the Kanawha Valley was not encroached upon by the last Ice Age, these mound sites are quite ancient. Human tools and implements dating back thousands of years have been found there. Certain earthworks in the area appear to be based on the same mathematics as Stonehenge and the Great Pyramid. Extremely tall skeletons found in the mounds are said to resemble those recovered near the Damascus Gate in Old Jerusalem

https://archive.org/details/paranoia_issue_52_summer_2012/page/n29/mode/2up

[the-firebird69]

Alien Skeletons Awaken Scene | Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crys...

There are more than one Sarah and she does go somewhere else no this is her and people want to know what happens and a son says it looks like these were humans and that their organs and such might be invisible and that their heads were a crystallized and detached and there is a story and he thinks they may have come from Mars and left a video there in the mask that their skulls are intact and you saw one in MIB headquarters in the movie A lot of people did it sort of thought of this it's on the alien then they thought of this movie and it's not old news because a lot of people don't see it but this is where they went and escape to and they for some reason went into some kind of cavern and didn't go anywhere else and it looks like a temple was built on top of them and we feel it was new and I think it's old and it went back in time our son thinks that our and what he thinks it is probably protecting a celestial and that is what happened quite often. But they are more than intact the skulls are not contaminated and the bodies are intact and it's more or less what happened the whole body petrifies and it's starting to come undone and they were absorbing people that they didn't show in the movie and it's not really there doing but that's what happened people will go on the mission get turned into these crystal skulls and crystalline bodies a lot of people want them to and they get returned and they put them in the same chamber and revive them once they find their bodies it's a hell of a process to get the data these people mutated back into aliens and in several days back into humans they decided they had to eat real quick and it's true but they flew off first and they do fly to New Mexico unfortunately for some of them but they're giving regular food and they mostly mutated to humans and people have seen it and think it's just powerful mutagen and they're studied and pretty much hell there one of them escapes and becomes Paul and there's another one that escapes and it's Roger and our two are helping them along family Guy the comic strip television animated series begins and some of them are real and no joke they actually happen folks this is a huge movie these are the powers of Indiana Jones and they're saying that he's a loser and stuff and no he knows what's going on and he's seen this before no but he's seen the crystal skulls and he sees that the machine and the revival system is very important but he it and he wants to know how they're turned into Crystal but it's the anatomy of the creature and it's the result of cohabitation and mutations and he doesn't think that humans can be petrified without it and they can't so the answer is that your information is up there but the witnesses are crystal skulls so while they're going on the mission up there he's down here working on the same mission and he wants to get to them and the ship because the information is on the ship now the ship ends up in New Mexico and they do try and study it and they do find something inside it and the ship disappears and ends up in New York shrunken down but the information is in that odd looking ball. And the alien thing said aliens were there and didn't see humans we think it was really our son and daughter's clans and several of the pods were seen leaving the solar system and they're trying to send them out for information and they were special and people can see that they're special they hardly detected them extremely fast and going in a controlled manner and that's what they're up to and it's evil to us. This is practically the whole thing your witnesses are here on Earth in a ship and you'll be surprised where it is some of them are not from Mars

Thor Freya

We are also in the above yes

Zues Hera and my husband picked this film and knew about the connection and he knows about the process and he understands it and the question is how did that happen on the ship and where are the alien specimens and they called the venom they do find them on Mars and they get into their ships

Olympus

[rubykgrant]

What the RVB Characters do for Halloween-

Donut; takes those “be careful of candy” warnings WAY to seriously, assumes everything is potentially poisoned or is The Drugs, and hands out flyers on how to stay safe (people take them, and then immediately throw them away)

Kai; one of those WEIRDOS who actually likes candycorn and black licorice, so she stocks up on it (wears a tank-top that just says “This is my costume”; Grif wouldn’t let her wear her more inventive outfits)

Sarge; hides in the bushes on a street corner to jump out and scare people dressed as some horror slasher villain, drenched in a gallon of fake blood (so he’s just RED), and cackles maniacally when they run screaming

Grif; after being convinced he can’t pass as a big teenager and go trick-or-treating, he settles for eating a ton of candy at home and watching a horror movie marathon (some neighborhood kids also throw an egg at him, so now he has a whole vendetta against a bunch of children)

Simmons; also does the movie marathon, but because he mentioned he never got to do a lot of Halloween stuff as a kid, the others decide to fix this by taking him to a haunted house tour (he’s mostly OK, until they got to a room with a bunch of fake rubber snakes that drop down)

Tucker; watches some movies too, but earlier in the evening he volunteers to help be a chaperone for a group of kids going trick-or-treating. He himself dresses up as a character from Reservoir Dogs... but people just think he’s Will Smith from MIB (he’s having so much fun helping with the kids, he doesn’t even notice all the single moms that try to flirt with him. ironic)

Wash; smuggled a black kitten home, hoping the fact that it is Halloween and thus the cat matches the holiday theme will convince the others to let him keep it (he already has 2 others... and to sweeten the deal, he got everybody lots of their favorite treats)

Caboose; in his Blue armor, and handing out handfuls of candy at the mall, taking pictures with kids; he was MADE to be a costume character, everybody loves him (also, Freckles is helping by shooting out jelly beans and mini chocolates)

Tex; got like... REALLY into decorating. She went nuts with it. She started putting stuff up on the first of October, and just kept adding more and more every day (when the others tried to ask her to tone it down, she just left and came back with a 20 ft tall fake skeleton guy)

Church; he also got REALLY into something... he started looking up recipes for unique treats and goodies, so he’s been baking different cookies/cakes/pies/muffins/ect all month and decorating them (nobody is complaining- they’re delicious. later, he and Tex go on a walk through a cemetery and scare some teenagers by doing their AI/ghost trick and popping up through headstones)

Doc; the official candy giver-outer for their place. He oohs and ahhs at all the costumes, and O’Malley will give the kids a spooky thrill by going into a rant (no real threats, just Halloween fun. the kids are crazy for it, some of them come back again- and he has enough candy for repeat customers)

Lopez; entered a Halloween jack-o-lantern carving contest and won (he had a HUGE pumpkin, and was able to carve a very detailed and delicate design that features a scene with vampires in a castle)

Locus; found out about a Halloween costume contest where the theme was the Reds and Blues. He asked to borrow Wash’s armor to dress up as him. He came in third (and then begged Wash not to tell the others he did this. Wash promises, if Locus will help convince them to let him keep his new kitty)

Carolina; started a spooky book at the beginning of October, and paced herself to finish it on Halloween. She mostly hasn’t been bothered by it... but there was just ONE little part of the story that kinda made her paranoid (and now she doesn’t want to admit a book freaked her out, so she’s being extra clingy with the others, not wanting to be alone)

[praphit]

These “M*F*K*Z” make me want to cut some vegetables.

This past Friday was the 13th, so of course, as a lover of horror, I had to break out a scary movie in the home.

At first, we thought  - Classic

Then, I thought, maybe some foreign freakiness.

Or maybe some goofy mayhem to celebrate the night.

Somehow, we ended up with "MFKZ". 

It's an animated movie about a young black man, who feels trapped in the city, while the world appears to be against him. Seems too real, for some, right? - I thought so too, but I was told there are a lot of chase scenes in it, so I was game. Besides, what's scarier? - having a monster break into your home and brutally slaughter you (but it's over quickly)?

 or

slowly dying in a God-forsaken hood?

We both know the answer I'm going for, but honestly, if I had the choice I'm going for the hood... unless it's a sexy monster.

I'm fine with sexy monsters knocking on our door, but that doesn't serve my post, so let's go:

"MFKZ" starts off by introducing us to a place called "Dark Meat City", where the action takes place. 

Apparently, names like "Crack Whore Town" and "Broken Home Valley" were taken.

Our hero is named Angelino,

 and he is a pizza delivery man by profession, though he can't seem to keep a delivery job. His best friend is a skeleton with a head full of flame. I don't mean that figuratively, for some drugged-up punk rocker.

I mean an actual skeleton. 

He’s kinda cute, right? - like he could Ghost Rider’s son.

Angelino also has a legion of roaches as pets (I’ll spare you a pic). Standing back from this info, "hero" may be too strong a term for him.

He's out doing his delivery thing in "Dark Meat City", when he sees a beautiful woman named Luna. Luna winks at him.

It is here when I paused our tv, to warn Angelino. If you find yourself in a cesspool of iniquity, but see one shining as a  light , and she happens to be a beautiful woman, who is playfully winking at your ugly ass, KNOW... it's a trap.

Angelino does not listen to me, and that's when the chases begin. He's chased by cops, SWAT, MIB, well-suited gangsters, street thugs, the government, demon aliens (yikes), he has a hidden power inside which also gets him into trouble, Luchadores 

(though they're chasing him to help him... and they're teamed up with his legion of roaches, but still). How many of you know that if you find yourself in a sitch which requires professional wrestlers and roaches to save you, you've messed up in life. Again, "hero" is too strong a term for him.

That's it! This movie is all about a variety of chase scenes.

And if that's it, it can make for a bad movie. I got bored several times. I actually started making dinner while watching. People got mad at me, but they know that movie is kinda boring. It's one of those on-your-phone-while-you-watch movies. Still, a scary premise to ponder:

You're stuck in life. Your place has roaches. You feel like everyone is after you. There's some sexy woman or man who winked at you once, and now you curse that day. You're scared.

You keep hoping that some writer/producer/director will magically place you in a different story or make this story that you're in better... but much like this movie, they never do.

So, you accept your fate and live happily ever after with a thousand roaches as your friends. The end (Ok, so not so much “scary” as it is sad).

Spoiler Alert, that's kinda how this movie ends, if you can even call it an ending.

Wow, that IS sad; a lil too sad, so let's just give this a Grade: D, and focus back again on the sexy woman or man who winked at you...

... who may or may not be wearing a napkin for a skirt.

Sure, it's probably a trap, but what if you seized that trap anyway. Sweep that trap off its feet! Have some fun with that trap! Get into some trouble with that trap!

LIVE, DAMN YOU! - without the roaches! Maybe the powers that be still won't write you out of your "Dark Meat City", but that's a better story to hear about than redundant chases. Maybe I'd listen more to your story, instead of periodically tuning out to cut vegetables.

Whatchu gonna do with your Luna? Ride her into victory or let her ride you into Hell?

I'm not sure if I should have worded it that way, but y'all know what I mean... I think. Plus, I'm too lazy to change it. And it smells like dinner is ready, so FKIT.

Ride on! 

[sakinthra]

Look I'm not saying that I have desperate and near unhinged desire to write a modern day sequel to Pirates of the Caribbean in which all of the curses and ocean magic and weird pirate shit still exist but are kept a locked and guarded secret by a MIB/SCP organization so that dumb idiots don't get their hands on cursed pirate treasure, and I'm not saying that this sequel should involve shady government agents trying to get their hands on the gold of Cortez to make an immortal skeleton army and I'm not saying this sequel should star the descendants of Will and Elizabeth and Jack and maybe even Barbossa resorting to some modern day pirate shenanigans to prevent a skeleton war, but...

No, who am I kidding, I'm absolutely saying this, time to throw it in the endless WIP bucket.

[11037void]

Dropping this here, for anyone else who finds themselves in such a situation:

Last night, I had trouble falling asleep. Something kept poking me in various body parts, pin and needle style. Felt like I was being watched too. At some point, the person in the room with me went downstairs suddenly.

All of a sudden, my neck and legs were seized, and I heard a sound I can't describe coupled with a name: Baron Samedi. (Also known as Baron Saturday)

I have never thought of, called upon, or known about this spirit until this morning. Although, I should have, I don't know everyone because this isn't a game like Pokemon. I take this stuff pretty seriously and take my time.

But suddenly, I was in the grips of what I didn't know until I woke up and started looking, was a powerful loa of Haitian Voudou, who is married to Brigitte.

However, I am not an idiot, nor was I afraid. Even if I'd known who he was, I probably still would have maintained my composure, I'm guessing. Plus, and I think this is very important: He announced his name. Not something an attacker generally does, fyi.

I said in my mind to him, "It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance, my name is *****, how may I honor you, and learn of your origins?"

Just. Like. That. I was released from tension, and although I know full well the randomness of such a situation, I feel like it was no happenstance. There's only one person I know of who works with these particular spirits.

I'm not saying they deliberately sent him my way, but something as simple as an online connection can make waves and threads, so it could be something like that; the baron being curious of me because of my correspondence with this one person.

Kind of like how if I think of someone too much (especially negatively) they start encountering MIBs or strange people approaching them, conflicts (with black people lol), etc.

So, in short:

Something grips you, you keep your cool, introduce yourself and show interest in paying your respects. (Especially when they are powerful enough to immobilize you.)

It's truly a fine art to accept that we know absolutely nothing about this stuff, but it sure is interesting to be a part of it. For all I know, my meeting him now could mean that my entire past was influenced by him keeping me alive. Yeah. We just don't know!

I do always sleep in skeleton dress though, probably nothing but worth mentioning, maybe. My altar is also adorned with things that would speak to such a spirit, and I always reek of fine tobacco.

Just a thought.

That's all, folks.

[space-chip-cookie]

New Hermitville’s Christmas tree

My gift for the @hermitcraft-gift-exchange is for @comet-pink. They requested something involving Bdubs and Keralis doing something goofy or Stress and cute allium-shrooms. So I combined this all into a great christmas tree heist story! Enjoy! ^^ (This is actually the first story i ever completely finished and also the first one i publish so *shakes* ;_; ) Also a huge thanks to @nopefabulous for helping me out with formatting, some basic writing help and punctuation etc!! ^-^

It was a peaceful morning in New Hermitville

“Hey, Hey Keralis, my sweet angel!!”

‘’Yessss Bubbles?’’

‘’Hey, I had an idea! Just look around you! What do you see?’’

‘’I… seeeee a verrrrry pretty village, a lot of potential tourist attractions, I see a minigame you’re working on, what was it the towers… a dungeon… some treasure hunt in there?’’

‘’Yes you see a tower over there, but my treasure already went up in the air for that! But never mind that! We are talking tourists here! And what is coming up? FESTIVE SEASON! We should plan something BIG, something that might even let Santa visit us himself!’’

‘’Yes yes yes, but what would achieve that?’’

‘’You see, I went around the server lately, and I found a very nice tree around hermit island, the Christmas district they call it. There is no tree like it around here. Our village needs that tree I tell you! We can always return it when Christmas has passed, we would technically be returning the tree before Christmas.’’

‘’Yes of course! Then! Lets go! Don’t forget to bring supplies Bubbles!’’

‘’Wait, why do I have to bring the supplies again? Didn’t you still have some diamonds left fro- Oooh OOOOH! You went by RUN again didn’t you? Did I not tell you to stop going by tha—”

‘’Never mind that bubbles, I foresee a problem. How are we going to move the tree?’’

‘’Oh my dear Keralis, nether portals of course!’’

‘’But then It’ll just get out at the other end of the nether! It will burn! No no no! that will not— Ooooh, I see what you are up to here. You are talking about our neighbours, aren’t you? But what are we going to do to obtain the help of Area 77?’’

‘’Well, we want a tree worthy of receiving Santa Claus, right? I mean, we just want the tourists, so what if we make the tree so grand that it will surely attract Santa Claus, and then Area 77 can obtain the extra-terrestrial man with a white beard from the northern hemisphere.’’

‘’Okay, let’s go to area 77, they just can’t say no to this plan! Oh! And bring some flowers!’’

‘’Eeerm, Bubbles I don’t think that’s going to work very well after that hippy incident and all… Let’s bring a chip from our authentic™ giant iron golem. Let’s call it a late housewarming gift.’’

‘’Oh yes very well Keralis! Now, let’s go!’’

Meanwhile at Area 77

Doc was working on removing some of those darn flowers from around Area 77 again, it truly was a plague. He was working in the gardens of Area 77 with his usual crocs on. In the distance he could still see the house of Keralis previously destroyed by the stray rocket. He would try to make up for it if he could… But at least they are gone and Area 77 could go on with their business as usual.

He still remembers Keralis being there like it was yesterday.  And Keralis would be there as usual, with Bdubs next to— 

Wait a second, those are Keralis and Bdubs!

Keralis and Bdubs flew over to Doc from the broken down house as if to remind Area 77 of the crimes they have committed.

‘’Hey Doc! Fancy meeting you here! How is the… gardening going?’’

‘’Oh yes, gardening is fine.’’ Doc looked away slightly, as if still embarrassed being reminded of that failed rocket test.

‘’If you two are looking for Scar, he is… busy with Jellie #37 right now, she was hungry.’’

Keralis stepped forward and went with his usual ‘’No, no no’’ followed by, ‘’Just you will do, we wanted to talk with you as the portal specialist Docm77.’’

Doc looked slightly surprised for a second, and then straightened his back as if he had just put on a MIB business suit again.

‘’Oh, is that so? I mean… I am sure I could do… something for you, in secret, under the table of course, for the proper… price.’’

‘’Oh I am sure we can work something out.’’ Bdubs threw a chip of the ancient iron golem skeleton to the MIB. “And if you do a good job at it, you could even capture an old man with infinite gifts. All you need to do for us is… move a big tree with a portal, it’s simple really.”

“I… actually, if I overload the current loaded blocks while placing some bedrock inside the void beneath the nether then the portal could be reconfigured to actua—”

Keralis and Bdubs walked off with Doc still mumbling some things behind them. They didn’t mind what Doc would come up with, as long as it worked.

The tree

Keralis and Bdubs where standing in front of the tree with thick winter coats, a muffler on their ears and two pairs of pants each. “Doc was supposed to arrive any moment right?”

“Yes Bubbles he certainly said so…”

“Maybe we can just play some minigolf in the meantime? It surely can’t take that long until Doc gets back here.’’ Bdubs was itching to do something else, tired of waiting, and Keralis was feeling much the same. Just as they were about to go to the minigolf platforms, a colorful portal opened in midair and Doc floated down to them.

‘’Hey Keralis, are we sure the MIB are not just the aliens themselves?’’

‘’Shush Bubbles, they might hear us…’’

‘’Hey you two!’’ 

Doc took a small break after his greeting and then calmly added in his usual smooth low voice, ‘’Preparations are all done.’’ Meanwhile his drocs touched the ground with snow softly crumbling under his feet.

‘’Just press that button on the left and it should go to the proper place.’’  

Bdubs being as impatient as he is, immediately ran to the left side of the tree.

He pressed the first button on the left while Keralis slowly looked over his shoulder.

‘’Hey Bubbles, isn’t there another button past that branch there?’’

Doc hearing this immediately went “Ooooh noooo’’, Ran to the duo and pushed them into the fading tree whilst everything went black.

Stress’s ice fort

Stress was tending to her allium-shrooms atop the castle, dancing around while singing a tune as she worked. Getting some hay here, removing some snow there, getting some eggs at her chicken. When suddenly the sky turned dark and a giant dunk could be heard. The whole castle shook. 

And then, looking behind her she saw a giant tree that had appeared to have crashed on top of her fort..? And the mumbled sound of some people bickering.

“Oh. My. God. I told you to press the left button and you just deadass press the wrong button? Do you have any idea what could have happened? I… just, don’t touch anything around the base of the tree. I’ll fix it, just give me some space.”

Keralis and Bdubs went up to Stress, who still stood there with her mouth hanging open, baffled by the entire situation.

Bdubs started the conversation with a jovial, “Hi Stress! Sorry for dropping in like this!”

“Dropping in? DROPPING IN? I’ve heard of dropping in but never this! I mean… I love the green around here. BUT A TREE DROPPING OUT OF THE SKY?”

“Moo.”

While Bdubs was keeping Stress company, Keralis heard a soft moo and saw the most beautiful animal he had ever seen. One that would have been a fit for Area 77, but no no no no nooooo. Keralis had a better idea. One that involved a shulker and some glass. And just create some half domes here…. Luring them in with some wheat aaand… close them. Some beautiful allium-shroom ornaments. There are still a couple left here to breed back up! It should be… fine?

“Okay but Bdubs do you realise what could have happened by landing here? Just be a little bit more careful next time when doing this kind of stuff, okay darling?” Stress stressed with her gentle voice.

Bdubs softly nodded “Yeaaaah,” and then saw Keralis wave from the other end.

“Hey Bubbles pssssst! Come here will ya.”. Keralis swung his arm around Bubbles and told him about the allium-shrooms, to which Bubbles had to keep back a grin from emerging.

“But… we need to get out quickly then, before she sees the other side of the tree!” 

“Oh yes yes yes totally, I’ve already bred them back up so she shouldn’t see a difference! But.. do you still have that button?” 

“Yes, right over here!” Bdubs handed it over to Keralis and told him he has learned to be more careful next time.

Keralis seemed to be distracted looking at Doc, while hearing Bdubs’s rambling about button safety.

“Hey! Doc! Is it almost ready?!”

“Hey Keralis! Yes, it is almost ready! It should be working now but I need just a minute to make absolutely sure okay!

Then Keralis dragged Bubbles with him in a single sprint, slammed the button on the ground next to the base of the tree and before Doc could even notice what had happened, he turned around, and the tree had vanished.

The void

There was darkness all around.

A young voice could be heard, the direction not clear.

So, it seems you have made a mistake…

And now you are here.

A childish giggle and a miauw could be heard.

Was it by my grace? Where you supposed to be here? Or was it your own wish?

Who knows? Who cares? For it does not matter now. Do you want my help?

Keralis and Bdubs looked at each other, dumbfounded, or in Keralis’s case, perhaps more shocked, with those huge eyes of his.

“Eeerm yes, YES we want your help! Where are we and who are you?”

While Bdubs was trying to talk to the voice, Keralis just turned around and tried swinging his pickaxe at the darkness. 

Okay, so do you want our help or are you going to help yourself? We can of course help you in differe— HEY! YOU THERE! DON’T SWING THAT PICKAXE IN THAT COR— 

While the entity was talking to Keralis, Bdubs’ pickaxe suddenly hit a hard object and the object lit up, it was a jack-o’-lantern that suddenly lit up the area and revealed watermelons, a patch of diorite, and the edge of the great tree. And the muffled sound of an allium-shroom-ornament mooing.

While the rest of this area was still covered in a veil of darkness this was still a whole lot nicer. But wait a second! Diorite? Watermelon?! Could this be the hermit of legends? The hermit that is with all of us, watching over us always and yet nowhere? Could it be… Timmy?

Oh dear friends, you need not use my name, as long as you know how to honor it. Now, why don’t you go back to the tree and hold it? You can see it now no?

Keralis and Bdubs staring at each other in silence, gave each other a nod and proceeded to silently walk to the tree.

The moment they touched the tree an incredibly loud “miauw” commenced, it echoed loudly, and everything faded back to black, then to white, and then the white slowly turned to color, to shapes.

And then they saw before them, New Hermitville, within the middle of which a giant tree where there once had been a plaza.

The tree on its rightful spot

“Oh sweet gods!” Bdubs immediately started hugging the ground while Keralis was still standing there dumbfounded. He slowly opened his mouth and asked, “So, does this mean that… that it is over? We are fine?”

“Yes Keralis, yes! We are back! And with the tree to boot! Glory be to Timmy! And that Doc!” He grumbled. “We should sue Area 77 for safety hazards!”

Meanwhile Scar entered the area of New Hermitville.

“So that’s the tree that Doc helped them with. It’s looking good around here, could use more cats but I like it, I like it. And even the landscaping is done pretty well, and look there! Those floating slimeblocks! Oh, that’s amazing! Oh, hey Bdubs, hey Keralis!”

“SCAR! We need to talk about that tree transportatiportal thingy! I don’t know what it’s called but it’s dangerous! It nearly killed us!” Bdubs aggressively walked up to Scar.

“I ooh, that’s eeerm, I will need to talk with Doc about that? But why did you bring the tree over all this way? Could you… please lower that sword?”

Bdubs slowly lowered his sword as Scar seemed to want to talk things through. “Did you not see I’ve got a Christmas tree service at the Christmas district? I could have just made one for you!”

Keralis stares at Bdubs in silence. And thought to himself, “‘Toured around the island’, he said… If only he would use his eyes! I always keep my eyes open!” 

“But, eerm.” Scar proposed, “Perhaps I can offer you a free tree service for next time around if that might help?”

Bdubs and Keralis realising they were partly at fault ended up accepting the proposal and then had Scar leave on their traditional piggyback ride. 

They did make it out safe, all that remained was hauling in the tourists and preparing the rest of the town! And of course, honoring Timmy who had saved them, but there are ideas for that…

And now there is a giant tree in New Hermitville, with beautiful allium mooshroom ornaments, a single block of smooth diorite in front, with a watermelon on top and some jack-o’-lanterns in the tree. And while peculiar for a Christmas tree, it was always kept there.

FIN

[theparadoxmachine]

17 questions

I was tagged by @theniftycat Thanks for tagging me! I really do like doing these things

Rules: Answer 17 questions & tag 17 people you want to get to know better

Nickname: If I ever get my life together I’d like to start going by K, just my first initial maybe. Kay, I guess if people want me to spell it out, but tbh just the letter, like an MIB agent. 

Zodiac Sign: Virgo

Height: 5′ 6″ - I’d look it up in metric but I’m afraid it’ll make me feel short

Hogwarts house: Ravenclaw probably

Last thing I googled: When did a US stamp cost 41 cents - Don’t ask

Song stuck in my head: I’ve been listening to music so it’s whatever I happen to be listening to, but I woke up this morning with “Mama I’m a Big Girl Now” stuck in my head. 10/10 do not recommend 

Following and followers: 343 following, 575 followers

Amount I sleep: Depends. On a work night probably less than 7 hours. I’ve been on medical leave and taking vicodin and melatonin at night which has been knocking me out for like 12 hours at a time. I don’t think I’ll ever have a normal sleep routine 

Lucky Numbers: I don’t really have one. I’m not sure there’s anything lucky about me anymore, unless it’s my uncanny ability to somehow have both the best and worst timing whenever a catastrophe happens. 

Dream Job: I don’t know anymore. I want to write. I still want to go back to school and maybe do something in academia. But I’m getting tired. I wanna dig in the dirt and play with skeletons.

Wearing: Jackelope tank top from Cayleigh Elise’s shop and black leggings

favourite song(s):  Tonight is What It Means to Be Young and Out of the Frying Pan and Into the Fire by Jim Steinman, Future Starts Slow by the Kills, Carpe Noctem and the Finale of the 2nd Act of Tanz Der Vampire (okay that one’s on here twice), Shake It Out and Seven Devils by Florence and the Machine

Favourite instruments: Voice, I’m a sucker for a good choral part, cello, violin, also a good horn section will always get me 

Random Fact: About me? I have really long prehensile toes. Long enough and dextrous enough that I can write with my right foot. 

Favourite Authors: Stephen King, PG Wodehouse, AC Doyle, Shakespeare, JRR Tolkien

Favourite Animal Noises: kitty noises, especially Ray-Ray’s noises. He chirps and purrs and makes little ????? sounds when you catch him unawares. Also I ADORE wolves howling 

Aesthetic: Usually I look like a really lazy vampire,unless I’m at home all day, in which case I look like an even lazier vampire. Also, cowboy boots. 

tagging: I hate to do this but I’m sleepy and I’ve had a rough time, so can I just do one of those “consider yourself tagged” deals?

[senzacaponecoda]

Cushitic numbers now

Since I did this for Berber and Chadic I guess I’ll go all the way. Drew words from lists at here https://mpi-lingweb.shh.mpg.de/numeral/Afro-Asiatic.htm

So the list ended with 4 sets of words based on the branches available to me.

Somewhat surprising to me, the Cushitic languages seemed to have some broad agreements on certain terms that make me think that the overall family, if based entirely on numbers, is slightly less diverse than the Chadic, more comparable to Semitic/Egyptian/Berber.

There’s another interesting parallel to the Chadic languages; there’s a tendency towards a base 5 system, although basically all of the families moved to a decimal system early on, to the point whre there’ s some tentative possible roots for a Proto-Cushitic 6, 9, and 10.

I’ve also been told that Cushitic languages don’t evidence the triangular vowels of ESB, but there were some phonetic patterns. There was an a-i variation that seemed to point to a common schwa, and similar patterns to what’s found in the Berber languages as far as schwa coloration goes. I wouldn’t be surprized if PCu turns out to have had the Berber system, a-i-u-ə. Here’s what I got

One is not really reconstructable. Proto-Central-Cushitic tended towards a root like *lakwa; Bedawi, the only representative of it’s family, has gaal; South Cushitic seems to tend towards a root like wak; and the Eastern Cushitic languages seem unanimous that the root was (ma/in)(to)kko. The velar pattern almost seems to point to something like *kwa(l) but I don’t think that’s enough sequential structure to really go on, even for a guess. If so, however, it means that the -ku element some people have pointed towards as being “masculine” in PAA might just be a fossil article of all things.

Two trends towards liŋa in PCC, tsar, cad, or liima in PSC, lamma or lakki in PEC, and is male in Bedawi. Overall, the PCu term for 2 was probably a root like *lamma . The *tsar root is notable, however, for being similar to the *tsar root in a number of Chadic languages, that I likened to the *tsan root that likely gave Egyptian sn, Berber *sin, and maybe Semitic *thnaan. So either the Chadic and Cushitic languages share *n>*r, or *tsar is a separate term from *tsan.

Three arrived at no common ancestor. PCC trended towards *sixwa. Bedawi shows mheej (not sure if j is /j/ or palatal, need to look up). PSC trended towards *tam, and PEC had something like *saddəħ.

Four might evidence the fəd’u root. PCC sədza does not, nor does PSC *ts’igaħ. But Bedawi shows fad’ig, and PEC has the root *afar or *afur, and it’s believable that d’ > r. The vocalism is also interesting, as Egyptian shows an initial j, which seems to have been a generic mater lectionis.

Five, PCC seems to have *ankwa. Bedawi outright uses the word for hand, apparently. PSC seemed towards a root like *ko2an and PEC tended towards a skeleton like *k-n with some velar element but also palatization. Something kind of akin to *ki’un or so. So maybe a PCu root for 5 was *kə2un

PSC and PEC show a root like *ləħo for six. Bedawi has asagwir and PCC trended towards something like wəlta.

There was no agreement for 7; I just got *laŋəta, asarama, *fanq’w, and *todoba.

8 was similarly diverse. PCC *səqwəta, Bedawi asimhej, PSC *dakat, and PEC *sidet. It’s interesting that 8 looks like the EBS 6, but what it means, I don’t know. In the base 5 systems the patterns for forming these look like Two-less, four-less, one-more, three-more, fofour, threthree, and sədit doesn’t really seem to fit those patterns.

9 generally showed some complicated outcome of what seemed like s+dz. PCC səsts’a, Bedawi aššad’ig, PSC gwelel, and PEC sagal. PCC/Bedawi seem to be ei-eight at some level, essentially, while if the gwel/gal elements are common in PSC/PEC, the sa- might be a prefix.

PEC was pretty unanimous about ten being tomon, which is similar to Bedawi’s tamin. PCC has something like *tsyka going on, which might have something to do with *tomon roots. Not sure about PSC mib though.

It’s 10000% percent possible that these reflect some areal systems, of course. That would obscure diversity in basal languages, while something like Chadic, which is spread out the way it is, might have more apparent diversity.

So for PAA, that just leaves us with 2, 3, and 4 in multiple branches: *tsin or *tsar, *krad, and *fd’u

[pearsonglass]

Up for auction tonight in the Marbles and things group on facebook is this happy day of the dead skull. Still a good deal as of this posting. #totem #marbles #monster #marble #dayofthedead #skull #skeleton #mib #mibs #lampwork #flamework #flameworking #lampworking #heady #happy #headyart #headyglass #rva #richmond #handmade #sra #sculpture #art #artglass #glass #glassart

[zarcake-writes]

MiBS here: @ White Raven, the cloaked skeleton: So you wanna bone White Raven, is what i take from your tags? lol

They’re a cutie lol. 

[foxghost]

hi here’s another instalment of “I stayed up too late reading 鎮魂, edition chapter 13 - 26

Zhu Hong spends maybe 3 days a month being half snake (anaconda?). She keeps raw sliced meat in the office freezer, thaws it out in the microwave and “eats them like potato chips”

She also has snake pupils and a snake tongue. /this novel has all your monster needs

Zhu Hong: if you’re willing to sleep with me one night, I’d work for free Zhao Yunlan (totally seriously): …really? Zhu Hong: … (can’t believe he’s actually considering it)

The “black cloak envoy” in the show is named one-who-slay-souls in the book, and is exponentially more terrifying

take what prisoners? Send whom to jail? kills all the things

Zhao Yunlan: he’s kind of nice actually, but talks like an academic, uses too many words to say one thing

A “hungry ghost” is a shadow that is thin all over except for the stomach, with a mouth that opens 180 degrees, with arms like a mantis

Shen Wei’s first reaction on seeing it is to pick up a chair and BASH IT UNTIL IT STOPS MOVING

Shen Wei: shocked face that the cat is talking Daqing: Yes right but you just broke the head of a hungry ghost with a chair so why are you even shocked

Guo (repeats in his head): I am a cop Guo: is crying uncontrollably * Guo (to Shen Wei): I haven’t even had my first month’s salary — can’t i even SEE the money I won’t live to spend before i die? Shen Wei says nothing to this because laughing at him is probably improper Guo: Does professor Shen have wishes that has not been fulfilled? Shen Wei: Yes Shen Wei: There is a person, we are mere acquaintances, we have no relationship at all, in his heart, I am but a stranger he has spoken to a couple of times. But I still want to see him once more.

with a hungry ghost scratching at the door and Daqing promising rescue by Yunlan Shen Wei: Don't we have ways to save ourselves? Daqing: this is us — a common person, a garbage person, a vegetative person, and me — a lucky charm. Oh, ‘save ourselves’ you say. Do you think if we go into a hot steam wok, it would be enough to fill the gaps between a hungry ghost’s teeth?

amidst all this chaos, Guo is climbing Shen Wei’s leg bc he’s terrified, and Shen Wei’s priority is to HOLD HIS PANTS UP.

Lin Jing is … a monk? (fake monk, according to Yunlan)

Lin Jing: there are two men and a cat in there Yunlan: no way, Shen Wei wouldn’t abandon his student Lin Jing: … who is this Shen Wei Yunlan: mumbles nobody important Lin Jing: You only ever do that when you meet a beauty — is this Shen Wei a man or a woman? Yunlan: buddhist chant

when the hungry ghost is sucking up all the air + souls in a room, guo screams: I’m going to be sucked up!

and then somehow has the wherewithal to make up metaphors: i’m going to be sucked up like jello from a vacuum bag!

Yunlan cuts the energy between hungry ghost and guo, and guo starts falling — onto Shen Wei. Naturally, Yunlan rushes forward and catches Shen Wei into his arms and let Guo fall on his face

AND HIS FIRST PRIORITY IN THAT SECOND IS TO LOOK COOL

Zhao Yunlan holds onto Shen Wei’s waist and takes a halfstep the the side, and the lighter’s flame illuminates his face — handsome, cool, his features as chiselled as with a blade, gazing from the darkest place yet his pupils reflect the flame He successfully keep this act up like a big bad wolf, lowering his voice and looking into Shen Wei’s eyes, and like a hero protagonist saving a beauty in a movie, he asks quietly: Professor Shen, are you alright? At the same time, he completely ignores the whining intern on the floor.

Yunlan can hypnotise people and change/erase their memories of supernatural events, kind of MiB like

He does this to Shen Wei, carries him (like a bride, bc just before that Shen Wei’s leaning on his shoulder) takes him to his student’s hospital room, make sure he’s comfortably sitting, says a protective spell and EATS HIS TOFU

which is the chinese way of saying he took advantage, kisses the back of Shen Wei’s right hand and says: good night, sleeping beauty

of course, SHEN WEI wasn’t ASLEEP

he ‘saves’ the protective spell and leaves by the second floor window

i guess Shen Wei forgets about being human sometimes, only ghosts come and go by the WINDOW

Guo Changcheng GLOWS to someone who can see (like someone with a third eye) between worlds.

Apparently he’s been using his allowance to do charitable work for YEARS. There is so much merit built up in his ‘books’ he’s practically a saint

Guo Changcheng IS SO PURE

When the slayer arrives, the temperature drops below zero and the windows frost over

he has a black claok, doesn’t wear a mask. His face is just BLACK MIST.

He smells like winter. (and it’s nice?)

… like freshly fallen snow in the morning when one opens the door to it for the first time, that first breath you take on a snowy day — like endless and eternal snow that never melts, clean, yet extremely cold, mixed in with the scent of flowers dying in the frost — far and away, a fragrance like walking to the end of the world. But it’s only for a moment, because after that one’s nose feels frozen and can’t tell any smells apart.

Guo’s explanation in his head for this is: he’s from the southern hemisphere and it’s winter there. (omg)

And then the moment the slayer goes off with YUnlan he starts asking after his health seriously

the slayer is a motherhen (when it comes to yunlan anyway)

he uses the same tone of voice to kill ghosts as he does asking after ppl’s health and Guo thinks this is terrifying (it is)

Li Qian killed her grandmother, none of that heartwarming retconned stuff in the show

the Slayer finds out where the Reincarnation-dial is from Qian and Yunlan follows because he’s curious and finds the place … covered in bodies … of monsters and ghosts that the slayer’s just slain / beheaded.

Yunlan: What’s going on? We’re all responsible for the environment, your honour was only coming here to find a thing, how did this battle happen. tries to step around the bodies but there’s no place to put his feet (what battle? it was a SLAUGHTER)

So it seems Yunlan meeting Shen Wei in this life time was planned by the villain

Chu (old Chu from Zhao, Brother Chu from Guo) is thin as a moving skeleton, about the same age as Lin Jing

And they all slack off in the office MOST OF THE TIME

Yunlan pursues Shen Wei for 3 months, Shen Wei keeps on giving him excuses, the cat makes fun of him mercilessly

Yunlan is eventually reduced to buying a box of old books and stalking Shen Wei with his car on campus until the students are all staring and he has no choice but to knock on the window and asks WHAT ARE YOU DOING

so in the show they made this all about Yunlan being suspicious of him, but there’s none of that in the book, at this point he’s just pursuing the professor shamelessly

Yunlan: this is for you Shen Wei: … opens box No, this is too valuable I can’t take it Yunlan: makes up a bunch of lies my friend’'s emigrating they leave their books behind you take them Shen Wei: I — Yunlan: I what, we’re so familiar already, it’d be unconscionable to say no to keeping the books, see you, let’s have dinner this weekend drives off Shen Wei: is conflicted while suddenly standing on campus holding a heavy box Shen Wei: is happy Yunlan is being so lovely Shen Wei: is jealous that he may be like this with other people

So, Yunlan is an introvert

Yunlan’s heart is a little lazy, hasn’t interest in anything, there’s nothing of import at work right now, and aside from one important networking, occasionally harassing Shen Wei, he spends all his remaining time alone at home.

Yunlan lives in a studio apartment, ‘like a dog’, or ‘neither pig nor dog.’ in other words, MESSY

it’s Yunlan, apparently, that turned his role as ‘guardian’ / command of sealing the spirits(?) into a police department.

Yunlan has ended relationships (or have it ended on him) because he just doesn’t want to talk when he’s home

the reasons are “lack of communication”, “no passion” “Our personalities do not match, we don’t speak the same language” and “You have never loved me”

so he finally gets a date with Shen Wei on Sunday, and on Saturday he gets up at noon, eats bread and water and plays video games until he gets a massive stomachache

he stumbles out the door in his pajamas, a coat, and no socks in his shoes, to get food, and overhears a robbery taking place, and it’s SHEN WEI

they end up getting dinner afterwards and he eats like a starving man until he basically collapses from stomachache

Shen Wei takes him home and they trip over an open umbrella, it hasn’t rained in more than half a month

Shen Wei: Take off your clothes and go to bed Yunlan: But if I do you’ll say i’m improper Shen Wei: What Yunlan: is wearing pajamas under his coat has no socks Shen Wei: blushes Yunlan: shows off his chest You told me to take off my clothes Shen Wei: ZHAO YUNLAN WHY ARE YOU NOT WEARING SOCKS Shen Wei: WHAT HAVE YOU EATEN ALL DAY Yunlan: points at garbage can Shen Wei: the whole day? What’d you eat yesterday Yunlan: dunno, drank too much Shen Wei: Do you live like this everyday??? Yunlan: um, yeah? Shen Wei: about to die of anger

Yunlan, way to impress future husband, high-five

meanwhile, Yunlan’s thinking: he’s never angry, but he’s angry because he’s fallen for me. Because i’m handsome (NO JOKE)

Shen Wei: You’re not so young, and you’re established in your career, this is about time for you to find a girlfriend and make a home, ti’s best to have someone take care of you Yunlan: Are you seriously telling me that you haven’t noticed I’ve been pursuing YOU (looks depressed) Then fine, thank you for today, i’m alright, you can go home (fully expecting Shen Wei to feel sorry enough to come closer, Yunlan has a speech prepared and everything)

BUT HE LEAVES

And comes back the next morning 7am with groceries (gosh i love this trope) and takes care of Yunlan

Yunlan’s kitchen is full of kitchenware with the pricetags still on

Shen Wei preps food and heats his hands over the heater before touching Yunlan

to be precise, he strokes Yunlan’s hair and then kisses his own fingers (excuse the blogger. screams)

He feels as if he is a moth that has realised its fate, holding himself from the flame is painful

Yunlan comes out of his bath (in the afternoon) to find that Shen Wei’s cleaned his apartment, folded away his clothes, aired out his room, and made food

So naturally, he figures now’s the time to PROPOSE because wow he’s found THE ONE

Yunlan: Seriously, if you would agree, I will sell this place tomorrow, and buy a big place near your campus. Yunlan: I never thought about buying a big house before, it seemed like such a burden, but now I understand: if I want a person as my wife, then I must build a gold house to hide them. Shen Wei (thinks he’s making fun of him): Eat your food it’s getting cold Yunlan touches the back of Shen Wei’s hand: Even though it may not seem that way, but I’m perfectly serious

- queue requisite “i’m a man” and “you should have children” talk

Yunlan: I’m not obligated to propagate the earth for the sake of mankind, Teacher Shen, are you an ALIEN???

- Yunlan literally tells him: if you really want children we can get a surrogate, it’s easy enough to have kids when you have money - Shen Wei then refuses to go to a movie with him the next week but it’s because he’ll be out of town for a week and Yunlan counts that as a WIN

back at the office: Zhu Hong: Xiaoguo is a good kid, fast learner, but he’s too cowardly, it took him this long to accept food from me Yunlan: That’s natural, he’s afraid of people Zhu Hong: … Yunlan: He’s not afraid of you, because he obvs doesn’t think you’re people

earthquake news play on television Yunlan: Why wasn’t it a bigger earthquake, I had no my arms open ready to comfort him and everything Zhu Hong: Who’d you seduce this time Yunlan: Don’t make it sound so terrible, spring must come to the world and flowers must bloom, its fragrance cannot be missing romance, you ppl must not insult other people’s pure love Lin Jing: buddhist chant Zhu Hong: HELP.

Wang Zheng suddenly appear in the office during the day (she is a ghost, they dissipate in the light) and everyone rushes to close the blinds and give her incense

Yunlan (takes out cigarette): YOU Wang Zheng (moves backwards): Don’t make me breathe your second-hand smoke. Yunlan: …you’re a ghost, madam Wang Zheng, you’re not going to get lung cancer. Wang Zheng: Ghosts can smell smoke and fire, if you keep doing that, you’re going to turn into a human shaped mosquito incense.

Yunlan calls someone sister-in-law over the phone

Zhu Hong: How come director Song is his sister-in-law? He doesn’t even have a sister Daqing: Who knows, he goes out drinking and gains sister-in-laws (?)

- The ‘red’ threads connecting Yunlan and Shen Wei are myriad and golden (and Shen Wei can see them)

[onthegoinmco]

The Scarecrow Stalk at Universal Studios Florida from September 18 to November 1, 2020, is a free activity sure to get your family in the spooky spirit of the season.

WARNING!!!!!!!!!!!!

IF YOU ARE PLANNING TO TAKE ON THE SCARECROW STALK AT UNIVERSAL STUDIOS FLORIDA THIS SPOOKY SEASON AND WANT TO AVOID SPOILERS, TURN BACK NOW!!!

BELOW YOU’LL FIND PHOTOS OF EACH SCARECROW AND SKELETON…SO KEEP GOING AT YOUR OWN RISK….

This free activity takes you throughout the park to find 13 scarecrows in skeletons to receive a Trick-or-Treat candy sampler bag!

Make sure to pick up your Scarecrow Stalk guide before starting on your journey as it has a map of where you can find the scarecrows and skeletons and shows the redemption locations. 

We started ours at the Universal Studios Store since it was near the entrance of Universal Studios Florida.

As you travel to the 13 locations, make sure to receive your stamp for visiting and to take some fun pictures along the way. 

Here are the Scarecrow Stalk locations at Universal Studios Florida:

1. Universal Studios Store

2. Silver Screen Collectibles

3. Five and Dime

4. Spongebob Storepants

5. MIB Gear Shop

6. Custom Gear

7. San Francisco Candy Factory

8. Rosie’s Irish Shop

9. Sahara Traders

10. Shrek’s Ye Olde Souvenir Shoppe

11. Film Vault

12. Supply Vault

13. Super Silly Stuff

And the Scarecrow Stalk redemption locations can be found at San Francisco Candy Factory and Studios Sweets.

I hope that you enjoyed joining us on our Scarecrow Stalk!!!

You can find more information about theme park news and tips by subscribing to our YouTube Channel and following @onthegoinmco on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram!

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