#ON LUKE HEMMINGS RELEASING HIS NEXT ALBUM | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

wiiildflowerrr · 2 years

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‘MANAGEMENT IS OFTEN ABOUT SAYING WHAT THE ARTIST DOESN’T WANT TO HEAR, WHEN THEY NEED TO HEAR IT.’

'Benjamin Evans, the long-term (but also quite new – details later) manager of world-conquering Aussie pop-rock band 5 Seconds of Summer, doesn’t love music.

He certainly likes it, he definitely knows about it, and he absolutely loves managing his superstar client.

But music itself? Not his No.1 passion...'

FULL INTERVIEW

PARTS ABOUT 5SOS BELOW CUT:

'...Evans found himself back in Nottingham, out of the loop, until, eventually, he pestered and persisted his way into Modest! Management.

There, after a few years, he began working with 5 Seconds of Summer, four Australian teenagers (Luke Hemmings, Michael Clifford, Calum Hood and Ashton Irwin) who very quickly became one of the most successful rock-pop bands in the world.

Their first three albums (5 Seconds of Summer, 2014; Sounds Good Feels Good, 2015; Youngblood, 2018 – all released via Capitol) went to No. 1 in the US and the UK.

Calm (2020, Interscope) only missed out on the top spot Stateside because of a shipping error (but went to No. 1 in the UK), while their latest record, 5SOS5, released by BMG last month, was No. 2 in the Billboard 200 – kept from the summit by the streaming juggernaut that is Bad Bunny. (Again, it was a No. 1 in the UK).

Evans was with the band on every step of that remarkable journey, until they left Modest! in early 2021 – a split that both sides have said was amicable and chiefly down to the band wanting L.A-based representation.

They joined YMU in February last year, with Evans leaving Modest! soon after to set up his own company, 17 Artists.

5SOS’s relationship with YMU only lasted around eight months, however, and this time the split wasn’t especially amicable: it was followed by talk of a $2.5m lawsuit surrounding alleged unpaid commission. That situation has, MBW understands, now been resolved.

The band, however, less than a year after leaving Modest! and making the biggest team-change of their career, needed a new manager. Thankfully, they knew just the man…

YOU SPENT 12 YEARS AT MODEST! MANAGEMENT, WHAT DID YOU LEARN THERE?

Firstly, you never stop learning in management, but yes, I owe so much to Richard [Griffiths] and Harry [Magee] at Modest, they were certainly great mentors for me.

It was a baptism of fire managing artists from X Factor [at the time, Modest had the contract to manage all artists that appeared on the show].

These artists were superstars overnight. It was both brilliant and brutal – and emotionally so challenging for those contestants, to have such fame so quickly and then potentially fall away and go back to relatively normal lives.

Managing their well-being while under such a spotlight was really tricky at times and it definitely educated me on people management. There was no better education, to be honest.

WHAT WERE YOUR HIGH POINTS DURING YOUR TIME AT MODEST!?

As much as I had loved working on [X Factor], I was really eager to work with an artist, not from the TV world who we could develop. When the chance came to work with 5 Seconds of Summer, it was exactly what I had been waiting for – a band with ambition and talent who I could grow alongside.

Actually, some of my favourite memories are to do with the great friends I made and the family culture we had at the company for so many years.

In terms of achievements, there are obvious moments like No. 1 albums and selling out huge venues, but I think it was [5SOS’s] third album, Youngblood, that sticks out. It was that era when people outside the band’s fanbase really started to take them seriously.

As a manager at that time, their ability to change that perception was inspiring. It was always up to them to shake off that tag and prove people wrong, all we could do was encourage that.

We always knew how good these guys were, but they were misunderstood by a lot of people. When you see a group of guys topping the charts at the age of 17/18 you instantly think they’re the next big boy band, and that’s understandable. But they were proper musicians and songwriters.

They just needed to be themselves and let their music and live shows do the talking. They were where they were because they fucking deserved it.

WHAT WAS THE WORKING RELATIONSHIP WITH CAPITOL LIKE IN TERMS OF BREAKING THE BAND AND THEN MANAGING THAT SUCCESS, BREAKING THEM GLOBAL ETC? IN PARTICULAR, WHAT WAS IT LIKE WORKING WITH NICK RAPHAEL AND JO CHARRINGTON?

I loved working with Nick [Raphael] and Jo [Charrington, previously the co-UK head of Capitol]. They wanted to win and there was no bullshit with them. The whole team were brilliant: Murray Rose, Tom Paul, Charlie Knox, and the international team with Rob Fleming and Tom Burrows. We all got along really well, which helps.

Nick and Jo were proper A&Rs, and even if the band didn’t always agree, it was refreshing to have strong opinions. I think you need that. But they always respected the band’s choices.

We all agreed She Looks So Perfect was the perfect debut single. It was pop, but guitar pop. The video was a little rebellious and the lyrics were cheeky. It was catchy, it matched the band’s personality.

We invested a huge amount of time internationally right from the first album, through all three albums that we made with Capitol. We did some pretty brutal promo trips around the world, but it certainly paid off.

Wherever they went, there were hundreds of fans outside the hotels or radio stations; they were shutting down streets. It was chaos, but the band were special. They had this really close connection to their fans and they were backing it up in everything they did. They just had that rare talent and work ethic you are sometimes fortunate enough to work with as a manager and label.

I’m not sure we will see it again either, in the way 5SOS burst onto the scene so quickly with that level of fanbase. With the exception of K-Pop, I think it’s a lot harder to break through at the level in today’s world.

Maybe I’m wrong, but I think the listener today likes so many different artists or even songs, rather than being totally obsessed with one artist.

WHAT WAS THE MOOD LIKE IN THE CAMP AHEAD OF THE RELEASE OF THE NEW RECORD?

After 11 years of releasing music, there was a very different expectation. While No. 1 records are, of course, very special, we know the band aren’t defined by charts – and I remind them of that. They have stood the test of time and we’ve just had a really successful touring year during very difficult circumstances.

Our perspective was very much that we are proud of what we have achieved this year, both the music that’s been created and how everything had been executed.

One of the proudest factors behind this album and what makes it even more special, is that 80% was written by the band and produced by Michael [Clifford].

To then get No. 1 in major markets like the UK, Australia, and No. 2 in the US was a brilliant achievement statistically, but that makes me more happy for the band and the people who work so hard behind the scenes.

What pleased me most personally was seeing these respected outlets reviewing the music so well and acknowledging where the band are in their careers. They are serious musicians and more and more people are seeing that now.

HOW FRUSTRATING WAS IT NOT TO HIT NO. 1 IN THE STATES, ESPECIALLY AFTER THE LOGISTICAL ISSUES THAT PREVENTED CALM FROM GETTING THERE LAST TIME ROUND?

Sometimes there’s nothing you can do about streaming artists like Bad Bunny! We were extremely pleased with No.2 in the US; it was a huge success.

There are so many factors that determine where an album charts, and that changes week on week.

For that reason, how do you really determine what’s considered a success? And as I mentioned before, the band shouldn’t be defined by that.

BOY BANDS TRADITIONALLY HAVE A DEFINITE SHELF-LIFE. FIRST UP, HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THE PHRASE ‘BOY-BAND’? SECONDLY, HOW MUCH DOES THAT IDEA OF A SHELF-LIFE INFLUENCE STRATEGY? DO YOU COLLECTIVELY WORK TOWARDS EVOLVING, BECOMING SOMETHING THAT CAN BE AROUND FOR THE REALLY LONG HAUL?

It’s an interesting question, but I’m afraid, to me, it’s also definitely a misinterpretation of the band. We’ve spent years answering the ‘boy-band’ tag, or rather educating people that the band are not a ‘boy band’. But it would be unfair if I ask you to rephrase it. The band constantly have had to answer it, so I will too!

They are four guys in a band that can sing and play instruments. If that’s a boy band, then so be it. But they are a boy band as much as The Killers, The Strokes or the Rolling Stones are a boy band. They are also a fucking rock band. I guess the Beatles were the first rock band that was also a ‘boy band’ to some.

I urge anyone to watch a 5SOS live show and then tell me they’re a boy band. These guys grew up together and formed a band, they’ve written all their music from record one, and now Michael has produced most of the latest album.

As I said earlier, it was up to them to prove people wrong and they’ve done that. Their fan base has grown with the band and the demographic is changing.

These guys are mid-twenties and have released five No. 1 albums over 11 years. They are only just beginning.

HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE 5SOS AS PEOPLE – AND THE DYNAMIC IN THE BAND?

Is it always laughs and smiles… no it’s not [laughs]. Nor should it be!

It’s work at the end of the day, and from the outside you don’t see that. But nobody works harder than these guys and they truly care and support each other. They care about their team. It’s those values that keep them close and keep the right people around them.

WHAT WAS IT LIKE WORKING WITH BMG ON THE LATEST ALBUM?

BMG are taking records incredibly seriously, that is clear. Thomas Scherer, Cyndi Gill, Dan Lynott and the team have been great partners for us on this campaign and we’re not done yet.

The band have always dictated how their records sound and what’s released, so it hasn’t been very different from the previous albums in that regard. We actually made most of the record before signing the [BMG] deal, but we did the same on [the band’s previous] album at Interscope. We wouldn’t sign with someone who didn’t put the artists’ opinion first.

NOW THAT YOU’VE GONE DOWN THE ROUTE OF RETAINING RIGHTS OWNERSHIP VIA YOUR DEAL WITH BMG, WOULD YOU EVER CONSIDER REVERTING TO A MORE TRADITIONAL LABEL DEAL WITHIN THE MAJOR SYSTEM?

I guess the biggest change [at BMG vs. a major] is being far more aware of the budgets, because it’s essentially all the band’s money and I’m very used to just going to the label and asking for more cash! But they’ve honestly been brilliant across the board.

It’s very simple: We want to work with whoever shows the most belief in the long-term growth of the band and are prepared to invest in that.

Who’s the most passionate about working with the band? More than anything you need people on your team who love the project, otherwise, what’s the point? One of the reasons we signed with BMG was because they showed that.

I suppose one of the biggest compliments I could give BMG is that they function almost identically to how the majors do, yet we have a very artist-friendly deal. It’s a great setup, but, in truth, we will always want to work with the team who can deliver the above.

WHAT IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING YOU CAN DO FOR AN ARTIST AS A MANAGER AND WHAT’S THE RELATIONSHIP LIKE?

Belief and trust. If you don’t believe in the artists you represent then you may as well walk away. And without stating the obvious, you have to trust each other and build a team and environment that shares that value.

Management is often about saying what the artist doesn’t want to hear, when they need to hear it. But so long as they trust you, they know what you’re saying is with the right intention; that’s key.

I always say management is about doing the necessary for the unknowing. Nobody will ever truly understand what you do, even the artist. I’ve had one day off in the last 12 months and that was Christmas day.

The artists don’t see that, they don’t see the relentless hours of calls, emails, planning, etc. that goes into the daily business of music management. Just like we, as managers, will never truly know what it’s like being an artist.

I’ll never know what it’s like waking up and seeing what someone has said on this or that platform. I’ll never know what it’s like standing up in front of thousands of people to perform or do an interview on live TV, irrelevant of how you’re feeling that day. I’ll never know what it’s like trying to write a song – it might sound fun, but it’s not always and can be really challenging to their well-being.

You just need to be understanding and aware, at all times, how this job can impact life – for the artist, our teams, the fans and ourselves.

WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE ABOUT THE MUSIC INDUSTRY TODAY?

This isn’t so much a music industry point, but I don’t like how exposed artists/people are in general with social media. There is very little protection.

Also, and it’s probably a common answer – that I was actually just talking to the band’s lawyer, James Sully about – but greater rewards for songwriters.

Record companies take the greater risk, as they pay the recording costs and bear the brunt of the promotion and marketing of recordings – including the staffing costs that [go with that]. But distribution costs have diminished so much in the new digital world, the balance between publishing and recording income doesn’t seem equitable.

FINALLY, WHAT ADVICE WOULD YOU GIVE A YOUNG MANAGER JUST STARTING OUT?

Work in as many areas of the business as you can before being a manager and always ask questions. Learning the ins and outs of all aspects of the business will help make you a great manager.

Secondly, learn how to manage yourself. It took me a long time to realize that. This job takes over your life with huge sacrifices on family, relationships, mental health. It’s very difficult to ever switch off, so you really need to manage yourself, which I still don’t do enough.

Thirdly, as I’ve already said, only work with clients you 100% believe in. That’s not just ‘are they going to sell records?’, it’s the whole culture around that artist: is it what you believe in? If it isn’t, don’t go near it.

Lastly, be a lawyer first!'

Music Business World, October 2022

#5sos #5 seconds of summer #5sos manager #music industry #music business #music business worldwide #interview #calum hood #ashton irwin #luke hemmings #michael clifford

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the-girl-who-cried-wolf · 3 years

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Diamonds - L.H.

5SOS Luke Hemmings fanfic

The original idea that sparked this burst of writing was from the line in Place In Me: now with my eyes open. I'm not sure how it turned into this whole fic, but it started with the basic idea of seeing things differently in the dark to how we do in the light (and vice versa too) if that makes any sense...anyways, enjoy reading! <3

Background: it's been a while since you've got drunk with Luke

Warnings: drinking, mild swearing, fluff

Word Count: 2k

The bass was thrumming from the speakers, the music almost deafening as the party raged on around you. You were sitting by the wall of the living room, nursing a drink, and watching the crowd of people dancing and jumping to the beat with the dim lights swirling shadows around them.

You had initially thought Luke’s album release party would be a little smaller, but more and more people had shown up as the night went on. The more formal celebration for the album release had already been a few days ago now, which you had attended, so you were a little surprised when you got the invite to just another “casual” party. Just a few friends and a few drinks, you were told. Not exactly what had turned out, but oh well. It was nice to get out for once.

You lifted the glass to your lips and took a long drag, swallowing the burning liquor as you surveyed the room. Everyone seemed to be occupied doing something, whether that was dancing, talking or drinking, or intensely making out like the couple on the sofa next to you. Your eyes drifted over the pair for a second before quickly turning back to your drink, gulping down another mouthful with a grimace.

“Not to your taste?”

You jumped at the voice, almost a shout to be heard over the music. The tall silhouette that had spoken sat down next to you, indicating to your drink as he leant back against the wall. Luke, the host himself, clearly a little tipsy, but more sane than most of the people here.

“Oh,” your gaze dropped from Luke’s messy hair to the glass in your hand. “I thought you meant that for a second.” You chuckled as you gestured to the kissing couple just over your shoulder. Luke leant forward to see what you meant, laughing when he leant back to rest his head against the wall.

“Sorry about that. This party got a little wilder than I thought it would,” he shrugged, turning his head to look at you. You weren’t sure what to say, so you just took another sip from your drink.

You couldn’t remember the last time you had talked to Luke one-on-one like this, it had been so long since you had even spoken at all. Years ago, you would have considered him a close friend, but time always has a way of putting people on different paths…if you were honest, you missed seeing him all the time. And now he had his own fucking album, and Jesus Christ, that just made the years between you feel even longer.

He seemed so different now, far more relaxed and smiling at least, and he looked good with a smile. Not to mention the loose shirt that he was wearing, unbuttoned over his tank top.

You couldn’t stop your curious eyes from drifting along the outline of his angled face, from the curls that tumbled back when he closed his eyes and leant further back against the wall, along the sweep of his eyelashes, slight point of his nose, sliding down his curve of his throat, stopping at the glittering chains around his neck that caught the light and sent it spinning back. You snapped out of your stare when his eyes opened again and he looked over at you with a smile, a flush taking over your cheeks. Hopefully he hadn’t noticed.

“Wanna go somewhere quieter?”

---

The cool night air brushed over your skin as you sat side by side with Luke on the balcony, fresh bottles in hand as you listened to the occasional sound of music and laughter drifting up to greet you. Your legs dangled off the edge of the deck, only a few feet from the ground below, Luke’s longer legs reaching much further down than yours. You’d forgotten how tall he was.

You weren’t sure why you had so quickly agreed to go with him in the first place, but your betraying feet had followed him through the crowd and out to this quiet balcony before your hazy mind could even object. It wasn’t that you weren’t comfortable with him, but seeing him like this after so long brought back all the memories of the parties you had got drunk at together when you were younger. So often you would sneak off somewhere to have a stupidly deep conversation, probably about shoes or some shit, even while you were completely smashed. It felt like reliving an old tradition, sitting out here in the place of your younger selves, the ghost-like memories watching you from the blanket of stars above. You had both changed, but at the same different nothing felt different. It was all so strangely familiar.

It felt natural talking to him now though, even if you were a little giggly and nervous from all the drinks. It was so nice to hear the little quirks of his voice and his smile again. And his laugh, god, his laugh was the best thing in the world. You couldn’t remember the last time you had seen him relaxed enough to hear his real laugh; the one where his mouth fell open with a little breathy wheeze first, then the proper chuckle of laughter that followed. It was adorable. You wanted to tell jokes all the time, just so he would laugh hard enough to fall into your side a little, leaning in close enough for you to feel the curls of his hair brush your shoulder.

You hadn’t realised how much you’d missed him. It was strange. But you were here now, easily talking and laughing with him like no time had passed at all, throwing casual banter about his album back and forth. If only this had happened sooner.

“Y/n?”

“Hmm?” You turned to face him, eyebrows raised questioningly. “Sorry, I zoned out there.”

His drunken grin was so sweet. You could feel a blush staining your cheeks again. Damn it.

“No problem, I was just asking what your favourite song was.”

“Song? Oh, like off the album.” You mentally cringed a little at yourself. The drinks were getting to your head now. He just grinned even wider and nodded a little, raising his bottle to his lips to take a long sip.

You dragged your eyes from him to watch the shimmering lights of the city sprawled out before you, gently humming as you went through the songs in your head to remember which your favourite was.

“I mean, you might not even have a favourite, it’s not that great so that’s totally fine-“ he shrugged a little, watching his fingers trace patterns over the cold bottle he was holding.

“Oh come on, Luke, the album’s a fucking masterpiece. Of course I have a favourite.” He looked over at you, a half smile kicking up one corner of his mouth. You just smiled right back and leant over to bump your shoulder against his. “Even though it changes every day, right now I’d say Diamonds.”

“Yeah?” Was he blushing? Surely not. “And why’s that?”

You hummed again. “It’s just the vibe, I guess. And the lyrics. It just feels so real, you know.”

“Yeah, I know what you mean.” He nodded. “That shit’s hard to write though,” he added with a breathy laugh, more sad than humorous.

“You did it well though, Luke.” His baby blue eyes finally met yours, and shit. He was stunning without even trying. Not fair.

“Thanks, y/n.” His voice was a bare whisper, the wind almost taking it away as it toyed with a loose curl hanging over his eyes.

You just smiled and lightly rested your head on his shoulder, so you didn’t have to keep looking at his perfect face, you could just feel the warmth of him through his thin shirt and focus on the slight shifting of his breathing.

He hesitated a moment before gently pressing his cheek to the top of your head, his arm encircling your shoulders to hold you.

Why was this so easy? Had you two always been like this?

“I missed you, y/n.” he whispered into your hair. You smiled into his shirt for a second.

“I missed you too, Luke.”

You both stayed there, silent for a moment, contently listening to the sounds of the party and just happy to be close again. A few heart beats later, you pulled your smiling face away from Luke’s shoulder, gazing up at his face as he watched the city lights out in front of you.

“What’re you staring at?” he said with a little grin, his arm still slung around you.

“Nothing,” you replied. “Just your pretty face.” You did not just say that out loud. Fuck.

He raised an eyebrow at you. “Oh really? At least someone finds it pretty,” he chuckled and took another drink, his arm that was around you falling down to support his weight as he leant back. You could feel your face burning, so you quickly tipped down the rest of your drink.

“Y/n.”

“Hmm?”

“Why do only flirt with me when you’re drunk?”

You stifled a choking noise and looked back at him. “What? I don’t-“ he raised his eyebrows mockingly again, and fucking hell, you wanted nothing more than to kiss that smirk right off his face. “Well maybe we’re only together when we’re drunk. When else am I gonna hit on you.”

“We should hang out more then, when we’re not sitting outside in the dark.” He sat up again, shoulder brushing yours, his low voice sounding close to your ear. “Then I can properly see your face when you blush.”

You weren’t sure you were even breathing, but he didn’t need to know that. “Don’t let it get to your head, Lukey.” He cringed at the old nickname. Finally, some upper ground. “Besides, you’re the one who’s flirting now.” You flicked at his shoulder, making him laugh as he quickly caught your hand. The smile didn’t fade as he looked at you, sky blue eyes roaming all over your face.

“Well would you rather me flirt with you all night, or just fucking kiss you already?”

Your mouth fell open a little in surprise, even as your blush darkened. The old Luke never would have been that bold.

“If those are my only options…” you definitely weren’t breathing now. “Then fucking kiss me already.”

That was all it took for him to close the distance between you, pressing his lips onto yours. His hand came up to rest at the back of your neck, tangling in your hair and holding you close as his mouth fitted to yours, lips pressing and teeth gently tugging on your bottom lip. He tasted like the drink he just had, sparkles of something fruity bursting on your tongue.

You knew you had kissed him before at other drunken parties, but this felt different. This wasn’t the usual game or bet to make all your friends laugh. There was no one watching you here, nothing on your mind but him and the way he was smiling into the kiss now.

You weren’t sure how long it had been when he finally pulled away for a breath, but you didn’t want it to end. No sooner had his lips left yours, you had a hand on his shirt to pull him back for more, deepening the kiss as much as you could. The hand you had on his chest slid up to cup his face for a moment, then you threaded your fingers through his hair. You swear you heard him groan a little when you did, making your stomach flutter as you smiled even more onto his lips.

Now when you broke away, you just rested your forehead against his, noses bumping gently.

“I didn’t think you missed me that much,” he whispered though a smile.

“Well fuck, neither did I,” you said with a breathy laugh, pulling away to look at him. His flushed cheeks framed by bleach-blond curls, blue eyes shining in the little light there was and an easy smile resting on his mouth. He was beautiful. Why hadn’t you noticed that before now?

“You’re staring again, y/n.”

“No I’m not.” You smiled, already blushing again as his hand found yours. He grinned at you, a drunk little giggle escaping him.

“Can’t wait to kiss you when I’m not drunk,” he said, fingers interlacing with yours as he pulled you in to another kiss.

Thanks for reading!! (tagging @stuffofseaveyy @mystiqueshithead hope you like it <3)

[masterlist]

#luke hemmings #fan fic #my writing #5sos #luke hemmings x reader

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thinwhitewritings · 3 years

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Common Ground - Luke Hemmings x Reader

Summary: Reader and her boyfriend take his younger sister to see 5 Seconds of Summer. But your ex is the lead singer of the band. Old memories make you realize how bad you’ve messed up, and things come to a familiar point.

Warnings: some cursing, mainly lots of feels and angst.

Rating: 18+

Author note: there will without a doubt be a part two to this at some point because I’m so invested in this. Also this is unedited sorry.

Your current boyfriend Dominic was one of the sweetest boys you’d met. His family was so kind, honest and empathetic - they adored you. You’d just reached your 5 month anniversary and you’d been around for his younger sister’s birthday. She’d gotten tickets to see 5 Seconds of Summer, and could take a friend and one of their parents and one of hers. She was so excited, and while you had your aversions to the group for… reasons, but you were happy she got to go.

You and Nic were staying in for the night - or so you thought. “I have a surprise for Kira!” He shouts, coming in from work. “Yeah?” You ask, looking to him as he smiles at you. “Well, and a surprise for you I guess.” He laughs, collapsing onto the couch next to you, handing you the envelope. “Look what I managed to score. A buddy of mine was selling them last minute because his girlfriend can’t go - something about her mom turns out…” you’ve tuned him out by now. The envelope holds four VIP passes to that night’s 5SOS concert. “Why is this a surprise for me?” You ask finally and he grins. “I offered to take Kira and her friend in place of the parents. You and I know the music far better than they do and they really didn’t want to go. I figured it would be fun for us to go.” He grins, clearly meaning well. The gesture would’ve been beyond sweet, if it wasn’t the last thing you wanted to do.

You knew every single word to every song - you’d known most of the CALM album before it was even released. Because you’d been dating the lead singer for nearly three years. Things had… gotten out of hand rapidly, and well, you broke up. Just as he was starting to tour, you’d taken it upon you to move out, get a new apartment, and just forget him as best as you could. It wasn’t an easy feat considering his high status. That and most people in the fandom had recognized you for some time. Luckily for Kira, she was too young to know who Luke had or hadn’t been dating, and fawned over most of the band without consolation. “Great! I should go get ready then?” You offer a smile, trying to seem as excited as you could be. He gives a nod, smiling as he says he’s going to text his sister the good news.

You put on such a familiar outfit to go to the show. A bright red cropped tee, black skinny jeans and a pair of strapped heeled sandals. It was a staple in your tour closet. Just the thought of it made goosebumps rise. You know that Kira’s tickets are on the floor - maybe even General Admission now that you think of it. That combined with sound check would most definitely be an interesting time. And the meet and greet. Oh you’re going to need plenty of drinks to get you through this.

The venue is packed outside. Only general admission is being taken right now, but that doesn’t stop the hoards of girls and fans at the back gate of the venue, multiple touring RVs parked out back with one or two trailers for stage equipment. You knew the layout like the back of your hand as you walked passed it. “Hey, you okay?” Nic’s hand squeezes yours looking to you with concern. “Yeah! Just, distracted, I guess. Haven’t been to this arena in a while.” You confess with a laugh, walking to security with your phone clenched tightly in your hand, digital ticket shining. You’d sworn you’d never come to another show if it was in your power. But, Kira and her friend are rattling on, talking about tour merch and clearing out space in their camera roll for fan interactions at sound check. The land yard on your neck suddenly feels heavier as you walk the tunnels to get to the arena’s floor, the scene playing out too familiarly.

Different genres of music play over the speakers, playlists that the group had collaborated with - music that inspired the album. It just made you a little upset. You had this music on repeat in Luke and your apartment. He’d never wanted to miss a moment for inspiration to strike. Nic and Kira and her friend are all deep in conversation as you stare at your phone. Subconsciously you’d opened Snapchat, looking to your recents. Instead, you take it in both hands, and take a photo of the stage, swiping to the tour filter. You add it to your story. Well, here goes nothing. Part of you wants to know if he’ll watch it. If he knows you’re there. Your friends are all swiping up, comments coming left and right. “Ummm why??” And “Don’t do it. Don’t. I know you want to. Just don’t.” And the worst “please tell me you’re not with Nic.”

You were though. He was standing next to you, a hand in your back pocket and going through his snap stories with not a care in the world. If only he knew that the blonde haired lead was the only thing you were thinking about. Before you know it, there’s scream erupting in the arena, not nearly as loud as they would be during the show - but enough to grab your attention. As they come on, you check your story. Luke with his stupidly funny Bitmoji sits in the viewed list. Well. Here goes nothing.

His voice fills the arena. “Hey everyone, how are we doing tonight?” He looks happy. A grin is on his face as he moves to sit at the edge of the stage. He’s talking with fans left and right, and you swear you’re sinking into the soles of your shoes. Nic’s hand is still in the pocket of your jeans but it doesn’t feel like his hand. The memory of Luke’s in its exact spot, and the sly grips he used to give it while you were out taking photos with fans in public - just to get a rise out of you after words. Those hands - currently gripping onto a microphone as he conducts sound check like he’s done at least a hundred times before. Maybe it hasn’t hit you yet, that he’s right in front of you. It does, when blue eyes meet yours for a split second. While they’re beyond brief, you felt like you’d jumped back in time in that second. It feels like you’ve blinked and sound check is already over, and they’re giving instructions to get ready for the meet and greet portion- fuck. The meet and greet portion. How the hell had you forgotten that part?

You keep cool while in line. Focused on Kira’s experience on not ruining that. Nic has caught on that something isn’t right, but he’s never been the type to ask what’s going on. At least not in public. So for now, he’s got his arm wrapped around you, and you swear that the closer and closer you get to the front of the line, the less and less close you want to be to him. You don’t want Luke to see. What’s worse, seeing your ex for the first time in six months? Or seeing that ex with their new partner for the first time in six months? You figure it’s the latter. “I need to go to the bathroom.” You blurt out, eyes looking to the group in front of the photo op set up, talking and mingling with the fans that were near them. “What? But we’re so close to the front, can’t you hold it?” Kira whines, looking at you. “Not really. I promise, I’ll be really fast.” You suggest, looking to Nic who is giving you a weird look. “You sure you’re okay?” He questions kindly and you give him a meek - but completely fake - smile. “Promise. Stomach’s being weird. If I’m not back by the time you guys get up there just go without me.” You wave a hand in his direction as you back up. He says your name with concern, drifting a little closer. “I’m fine, promise.” You blow him a kiss before turning rapidly the other way toward the bathrooms.

If bathroom was code word for ‘bar’ then you wouldn’t have been lying to your boyfriend. You sat in line, nervously texting your best friend everything that had been happening, while waiting to order a drink. She’s questioning your every decision and frankly, so are you. Why did you even come to this stupid thing, when you knew he was going to be here? With a sigh you quickly hand over your ID while reciting your drink order. Once it’s in your hand, you’re practically chugging it. You make your way back to your seats, if you can even call them that, and decide to put on an act for Nic. You can get through this. There was no way that Luke was going to come in contact with you throughout the show. Eye contact? Maybe. Physical contact? No. So there would be no discussion, no guilt, no nothing. Nic and his sister and her friend return with a grin, Kira going on and on about the band of men that had once felt like family to you.

It wasn’t long before the already somewhat crowded arena was full, the opening act had come and gone, and the lights were dimming for the main part of the show. You were currently nursing your second drink, telling Nic to keep them coming for the night. Thank god you weren’t driving. The opening song comes along, screaming that you were adjusted to, the same song and dance. You don’t hesitate to sing along as the music blares, Nic grinning when he sees this. He assumes you’re finally enjoying yourself, so when you see his grin yours falls. If only he knew. You’re about halfway through the show when the transition music slows. You know this intro. You know the monologue. You know the beginning note. But this monologue is different. “So, a while back, we wrote this song. It was off the Youngblood album, and a lot of you, I mean a lot of you related to this song. When we wrote it, I was in a happy relationship. There were no cracks, no issues. So, I’d had to draw from most of Ashton’s experiences, and some really old ones. I was really proud of what we’d made, and I’m assuming these guys were as well.” Luke’s speaking as Michael and Calum stay quiet, strumming along, Ashton giving a kick line. “But then the cracks came. The foundation shattered and this song… this song became the very essences of my life. Everything I had been trying to convey came through, two fold. I thought that I’d get through it, and I honestly thought I was. But… I recently realized I’m not. If you wanna get your lights up feel free. This is Ghost of You.”

The instrumental is the brutal silence you hold as you slowly drift from Nic, from Kira, from the crowd. Your gaze is laser focused on Luke as the words ring through the stadium. You’d heard this song a million times over. It’s been one of your favorites from the record. When you two split, you deleted it off your phone. Any trace of him honestly had been moved from your daily rotation. So as he stand, rocking on his feet as he sings, the blonde is bringing you to tears. The song is wrapping up, the lights fading into dark as they queue the next song, screams coming in as Nic’s hand is on your arm. “Baby… what’s wrong?” He finally asks it. The question that he’s been wanting to the whole damned night. You look at him, tears rolling down your face. His hand comes to cup up your cheek and wipe the tear away, lights raising up as the next track starts. Your head turns to the stage as the baseline starts in your mind, the words playing in your head. Easier. The one song that you had screamed the words to the second Luke had sent you the demo. The song that you’d screamed at your radio in the car while moving to your new apartment fresh post breakup. The song that was pulling you back to him. You had a choice to go. To go home and explain later. Or to stay. To stay here, explain to Nic what was going on, and how you couldn’t stay with him. “I can’t do this.” You shout at him over the music. “What? What are you talking about the show isn’t over yet.” You start to explain that this relationship has been doomed from the start, and that you still have feelings for your ex. The song ends and Nic looks at you with confusion on your face. “Babe, what the fuck brought this on?” The question comes between songs, and the next song is timely. Not In The Same Way starts playing and you can’t help the stupid grin on your face. “I love you. I do. But not in the way you think. I’m sorry Nic. I’m so sorry.” You pull your hands away from him, staring to leave the GA section and finding your way out from the floor. Instead of moving toward the exit of the building, you make the complete opposite move. You go towards the tunnels that lead backstage. When you reach the security mark, you simply stand there, not forcing your way forward, simply waiting there.

You hear the show end, the encore leaving your ears ringing at the shouts from She Looks So Perfect and the screams of the end of show. Knowing that they’re moving behind stage by now, you keep your eyes peeled, seeing a large group of people move down the hall. You stay waiting, eyes still red, as you hadn’t stopped crying since leaving Nic’s side. You watch slowly as the group are about to turn into a tunnel when Michael stops. Ashton turns to face him, questioning him, leaving Mike to raise a hand and wave at you. You return it with a slight laugh, Ashton following his gaze. His expression is confused as Calum peeks his head around the corner. You finally hear him, the soft tired voice echoing through the tunnel. “Guys, I just want to go to bed, cmon.” Luke meets the group in the middle of the tunnel, finally looking to see what they were staring down. He’s just as frozen as you are, the two of you standing in silence for a few moments. The other three give a nod to you as Luke turns to them, a dismissal you’re sure, before he starts to head your direction. Security watches him as he pauses just before the rope line. Your name leaves his lips, no emotion behind them. “Luke.” You return the response before he finally asks. “What are you doing here?” You sigh and start to explain the situation, what had happened, how you were single again suddenly, not to mention didn’t have a ride home. “I thought that was you at sound check. I swore that I’d seen your eyes, and thought I was going crazy for a minute.” He mumbles, looking down to the floor briefly before looking at you. You’re sweaty from being in a crowd, your makeup running slightly, eyes red. “What do you want me to do.” It’s not snarky, it’s not a dismissal, not angry. It’s genuine. He wants to know what your next step is. “Can we… talk?” The blonde thinks for a moment before nodding. Security lets you through, and you fall into step with him. You’re right next to him as you walk, your arms briefly brushing together every now and then. His arm suddenly lifts, and you feel a familiar grip in your back pocket. “Is this okay?” He questions, his hand retreating slightly. “Yeah. Yeah it’s more than ok.” You snuggle closer to him as you walk to the touring RVs, ready to talk things out. To get back to where you were.

#luke hemmings x reader #luke hemmings #5 seconds of summer x reader #calum hood #Michael Clifford #Ashton Irwin #5 seconds of summer #5 seconds of summer fanfiction

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suchalonelysunflower · 3 years

Text

Over And Out (l.h)

End Up Here - Part 4

Pairing: Luke Hemmings x 5sos! Fem! Reader

Summary: A tour. A secret relationship. And rumors only grow...

Warnings: Angst, mild smut. Mentions of harassment, sexual harassment, sexual abuse, physical abuse, verbal abuse, creepy men, jealousy, alcohol, cheating, fighting, sexism, and many frustrations. Language and some grammatical errors (English is not my first language, I’m sorry)

Word Count: 10k

Author’s Note: this is the most frustrating thing I’ve ever written, I believe. Next part will be up on March 14th. Remember that Reblogs, Fedback, Comments and Likes are very important! You have no idea how much they help me ❤️ Hope you like it and Happy Reading 🦋🌻✨

My Materialist // wanna be part of my tag list?

Series Materialist || part 1 || part 2 || part 3

Liked by michaelclifford, 5sosfan4eva and 1,573 others

lukehemmings and away and away we go ✈️

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5sosfan4eva THEY ARE TOTALLY DATING

↪️ calumlovesash I hope they’re not 🤢 she was much better with Madden or Josh. At least they’re famous

yn5sos I’m changing seats with Michael

↪️ lukehemmings @yn5sos 🥺

@5sos EUROPE ARE YOU READY?!

“I can’t believe we’re already here!” Y/N cheered as they got to the hotel.

It’s been a month on the road already and they finally had a few days to rest before traveling to yet another destination. They had the idea of doing a tour to promote not only their new singles and tease the album release that’s bound to happen next year, and it ended up being one of the most incredible ideas they had after spending almost a year without doing shows.

They started with a small tour in Europe, then they will move on back home in Australia for a couple of shows, and then the big finale in the United States where most of their shows were already sold out. By that time, the fans would’ve already listened to the new songs and be even more hyped for the new album.

Luke was the newbie on tour, this not being the first time he traveled away from home, but the first time he did it with people he cared about. He was having the time of his life with Y/N, the boys, and their s.o. It all felt like a dream. He was actually living the life of a rockstar on his summer break, even if most of the things they did they had to keep it a secret.

When Y/N invited Luke on tour there was no way he would’ve said no to her - not just because he pretty much can’t say no to her, but that’s another story.

She said she wanted to take it slow and that was exactly what they were doing. They didn’t put a label on whatever they had going on, but rather they enjoyed the moment stealing kisses and nights whenever they could.

They would sneak out into each other's rooms late at night, longing to be closer. They would spend hours upon hours tangled in the sheets, loving each other and sharing whatever was on their minds at the time. Making those moments their own amid their borrowed time between destinations. A moment for the two of them.

Luke found it weird at the beginning; hiding their relationship from the world until it became official. But these last few months he could see a change in Y/N, she seemed happier, more open to talking about her feelings and her past. He understood that this was important to her, to live a normal life until she feels ready to share it.

If time is what she needed, time is what she’ll get.

The boys and their girlfriends were all supportive. They too understood the importance of keeping some things private as well as the changes in Y/N’s behavior. They were all happy to see their friend back, just in time for tour.

But it was almost impossible to control what was put in the media. The fans already know who Luke is and that he spends a lot of time with the members of their favorite band. They speculate about his relationship with Y/N, creating rumors that even though he wants to, he can’t confirm nor deny. And when it came to the media outlets, those were much, much worse.

They didn’t say much about him “The privilege of being normal” Said Calum once. But they did have a lot to say about Y/N…

“Y/N L/N is back at it again with a new man?!”

“No tears this time? Y/N L/N Caught smiling and getting cuddly with a member of her team! Can she mix work and pleasure?”

“Serial heartthrob Y/N L/N seen with other men while still refusing to talk about her most recent break-up? Sounds fishy to me!”

“What was she thinking?! Y/N L/N was spotted in an outing with his “new friend” wearing very thin shorts and a crop top. Not so family-friendly apparently”

Horrible things were written about her every day but she ignored them as if they didn’t exist. Luke wished he could do the same.

Every little article, tweet, or comment about Y/N made his blood boil. It was clear that they were completely made up to be some “big news” when the reality was far from that and they kept disrespecting them and their relationship even if it was still on the down-low.

But Luke could not stop reading them. It was addictive how he couldn’t resist clicking on her name every time it popped out, not because of some morbid reasoning behind it, but because those articles seemed to know more about Y/N than Luke himself. People kept talking about a past he didn’t know she had. Were those made up as well? Or are they based on reality? Would he be able to know the difference?

Truth was, he couldn’t. He loves Y/N blindly, he got to know her in one of the most genuine ways but it feels like that is not enough. It’s almost like she is living a secret life he doesn’t get to know.

He wonders when it will end. This seemingly permanent stage of seating on the sidewalk, waiting for the light to turn green so they could walk freely into their relationship. Where people will support them, respect her and let them be happy. But that could never happen when she’s the one who doesn’t want to move.

Luke respects that she is not ready to talk, as she said time and time again. But he just couldn’t comprehend how she, right now, could be so at peace while her name is thrown through the mud and back. Smiling with the boys as they take pictures for promo while management arranges the check-in. Does she not know what they are saying about her or she just accepts it without any retribution?

He was asking himself all these questions as he watched her so happy, his mind tormenting him with a dark cloud over their sunny day. He wants to protect her, but he doesn’t know how or if she would even let him.

And yes, maybe that was selfish of him. Banging on a closed-door with his heart in his hands. But what about the person with the key and the lock? Aren't they a little bit selfish too?

“Hey!” He heard Kat said as she sat beside him, nudging her shoulder against his.

Luke turned to her, his eyebrow still locked in a frown as he muttered a little “hey”

The blonde girl scrunched her nose at him “Yikes, what's happening that it has you all worked up, buddy?”

Luke pressed his lips on a thin line as his eyes traveled back at Y/N. She was laughing at something Ashton had said when she turned to look at him.

Y/N smiled, winking at him as she waved. Luke stared at her for a while, a small smile playing on his lips as he raised his hand in acknowledgment. He could feel his heart skipping a beat every time their eyes met, but the dark feelings in his mind made his expression turn sour the moment Y/N turned around again, something that didn’t go unnoticed by the girl sitting next to him.

“You read them again, didn’t you?” Kat asked, already knowing the answer just by looking at how his shoulders tensed the moment she asked it.

They were all aware of the tabloids and the stories, being a regular occurrence to them, but not for Luke. They all knew this was new to him as well and how overwhelming it might be. So they all tried to ground him as much as possible, not letting him get affected by it as he had before.

“Now why are they saying that?!” He spat as he threw his cellphone on the leather couch, calling the boy's attention.

It was a normal day at the studio. They were all getting lunch as they laid back in the break room while Y/N and their girls went out to get them coffee.

Calum was the first one to speak, confused by his friend's sudden outburst “Uh, what exactly? And who?”

“This!” He said, grabbing his phone and tossing it at Calum. The rest of the boys gathered around as Luke plopped himself down on the couch.

Ashton began to read out loud “Seeing the growing rumors of Y/N’s mystery man, here’s a list of every guy we wished would date her”

“Okay that’s fucked up,” Michael said, swallowing his food.

“It’s better than the last one…”

“What?!” Luke asked, outraged that there are worse things out there.

“Dude, chill,” Calum said, “We understand this is beyond fucked, especially now that you’re dating or whatever. But you getting this angry at it won’t solve anything”

“Won’t solve anything?!” He said in a loud tone “That’s my girl they’re talking about. My girl dating other guys while she’s with me!”

“But they don’t know that,” Michael argued.

Luke shook his head, taking his phone back from Calum’s hands as he started typing furiously.

“What are you doing?”

“What does it look like I’m doing?! Letting them know that they can go fuck themselves” Luke answered, eyes still on the phone, a second away from pressing send before Calum snatched his phone.

“No!” He said “You are not going to out your relationship without her consent!”

“But-“

“Plus, I already took care of it,” Ashton said, holding his phone up “I tweeted at them telling them how incredibly disrespectful they’re being, now the fans are onto them and I already messaged management to deal with it”

“And that’s it?” Luke’s eyes winded “That’s all you’re gonna do?”

“That’s all we can do right now,” Ashton said with a sigh, sitting next to it “We know these situations suck, they’re horrible and dehumanizing and we are glad more people are realizing just how shitty the media is. But if we respond to every rumor there is it’s going to be a never endless battle, it’s going to backfire. We know, we tried”

“But all the stories are aimed against her” Luke said, running a hand through his face with frustration clear in his eyes “She didn’t do anything wrong!”

“Why do you think that is?” Michael chimed in “Think about Taylor Swift, Katy Perry, Miley Cyrus, Britney Spears… They aim for women because they think are easy to kill”

“Which they’re not. It makes them stronger somehow. I wouldn’t have been able to handle it if I was them” Calum said “Women are stronger than you think when it comes to this, Y/N included”

“We’ve been living with this kind of shit show for years. We defended her with knives and teeth, dragging every single outlet that posted something against her. But that shit only made it worse for her”

“They loved the attention they were receiving” Ashton’s voices laid with sarcasm “Every interaction we had they profited from it, creating even more rumors, one worse than the other, just so they could have the clicks. Eventually, Y/N asked us to stop defending her publicly and she decided to ignore it altogether”

“But we still fight for her, though. We flag the post, demand they take it down, talk to PR and management for damage control, and even sue for defamation a couple of times. She’s never got to go through any of that on her own, we wouldn’t have allowed it”

“And what am I supposed to do, then?” Luke asked, a mix of frustration and desperation filled his voice “Just do nothing?”

“Be there for her” Calum answered like it was the most obvious thing in the world “Support her. Love her. Comfort her. Whatever she needs. She’s a strong woman, one of the strongest we know. But there will come a time when she will have to lean on someone, and you have to be there and ready for her. She trusts you. Don’t let her down”

Kath placed a hand on Luke’s shoulder, understanding the man’s pain.

“I just-“ He said with a sigh “She never reads them, you know? The articles. But I do, I can’t help it. They seem to know more about her than me and that’s just-“

“Fucked?”

“Yeah,” He said as he took a long breath “I don’t know… I’m trying. This is all very new to me and she’s a professional at dealing with this kind of shit. But at the same time, she never tells me anything, how she feels about them or if they’re real or not. It’s fucking me up”

Kat hummed “And I assume you don’t ask her about it either”

The girl crooked an eyebrow at Luke, seemingly seeing through him “I- I don’t want to push”

She sighed and patted his shoulder “Let me tell you something, Luke. From girlfriend of a celebrity to the boyfriend of a celebrity” She started, earning Luke’s complete attention “When I started dating Calum we decided to keep it private, out of the eyes of the media and even from some of his friends. It was good at the beginning, great even! But the heart is ambitious and it always ends up wanting more. We fought a lot during those times, part of us wanting to hold on to what we had but at the same time longing for some kind of freedom. In the end, we did end up going public, as you know. We endure a lot of hate, we still do. But we knew what we were up against, you’re still trying to figure that out. But I’m telling you to know there is something you’re lacking”

“And what is that?” Luke asked with curiosity.

“Communication” Kat smiled sweetly at him “How do you expect to reach a meeting point while you’re sitting here in your own dark cloud and she’s over there with no clue of what’s happening with you and vice versa?”

The blonde girl got up from her seat next to him, giving him one last piece of advice before walking towards Calum “Don’t give up before you try. No one said it was going to be easy but, it’s your choice to see if it’s worth it”

Luke watched her walk away, rousing her arms around Calum’s waist as she smiled sweetly at him, giving him a small peck. Luke smiled at their love.

He thought about their friends, how in love they are with their partners and how free they are to love publicly, facing the retaliations of being in the public eye. But they seemed happy, they were happy. And he realized he wanted that for him and Y/N.

His mind drifted off to the possibility of going public, cleaning the air once and for all. No more “mysterious guy” or “Y/N’s possible secret lover” he’d be Luke Hemmings, the proud boyfriend of singer Y/N L/N. They could be happier, free. They could fight those rumors together and face the stormy weather that would come. He’d defend her until the end of times, protecting her with his life and supporting her in everything she does. He wanted that for them. But it wasn’t his sole choice to make.

“Babe!” He heard Y/N call.

She was walking up to him, a playful smile on her face as the nickname rolled off her tongue. She was wearing one of his hoodies, making her look small as she approached him.

He noticed that her eyes were shining, lately, they always did and he couldn’t get enough of them. He could get lost in her eyes willingly, throwing away the map and making himself home.

He loved her. Oh, he was so in love with her he didn’t even know what to do. The more he thought about it, the more sure he was about wanting to love her freely. He just wished she thought about it too.

“I got our keys” She smiled, pulling two cards out of her back pocket.

“Oh?” Luke asked playfully with a grin drawn into his face “And where am I supposed to sleep this week?”

In order not to create any suspicion about their relationship, they decided that Luke will have his own hotel room on tour - even though everyone knows that’s not where he sleeps or where he wakes up in the mornings. Usually “Luke’s room” is used to store the extra luggage they carry.

Y/N fake pouted “Sadly, Mr. Hemmings. Your room is at the other end of the hall”

Luke gasped “That far away?! Is there any way I can be… closer?”

The girl bit her lip as she rounded her arm around his waist, standing on her tippy toes as she softly whispered in his ear “Let’s see what I can do about that, Sir”

Y/N giggled as she heard Luke let out a soft groan, pecking his cheek with a small kiss as she stood in front of him again “Baby, you’re going to be the death of me” He said, trying to get a hold of her by her waist. But she was quicker, swiftly moving a step back as she started walking towards the elevators. One last look over her shoulder got him grabbing their things as he followed her without any questions.

The elevator ride is quiet, the beating of their hearts being the soundtrack to their wait as they reached their floor. Y/N didn't look at him as she walked towards the door, unlocking it with one swift movement of the wrist and leaving it open for Luke to come in after her.

When he opened the door, she was nowhere in sight. He wondered if she hid somewhere, this not being the first time she would jump and scare the shit out of him. But then, his ears picked up a soft humming coming through the bathroom door, and with a devilish smile he let their luggage at the side of the closet, he locked the door and made his way to her.

Y/N was humming one of her favorite songs when Luke caught her reflection in the mirror but she was not looking at him. She was putting some lotion in her hands, fingers tracing up until her upper arm with barely-there touches.

“Remember we have a party in a couple of hours, Hemmings,” She said when she felt him getting closer “We should get ready soon” He just hummed in agreement, not really paying attention to her words.

Softly, he placed his hands on either side of her hips, pulling her closer to him. Y/N kept ignoring him as she dried the excess of product out of her hands and it wasn’t until Luke pushed away some of her hair and started kissing along her neck that she finally gave him a proper response to his action.

Luke smirked as he felt her let out a shaky breath as his lips traced the shell of her ear, kissing it softly before moving lower and lower, kissing and sucking on her skin as slow as he could, making her tremble under his touch.

“Luke,” She said, holding her breath as she felt his calloused hands travel under the hoodie she was wearing. His hoodie. The one that always smelt like him.

“Hmm?” He asked, not stopping his movements for a second.

“We- uhm” The girl stuttered in a whisper when his hands started touching her over her bra, softly rolling over the nipples and making them hard “We should - oh - we should start getting ready soon”

“We should, huh?” He asked, voice raspy and low “It will be rude to go a little bit late. Wouldn’t it?”

Y/N let out a sigh when his hands left her breasts, trying to regain her breath before she lost it all over again when his fingers started playing with the hem of her jeans.

His fingers wandered carefully, fiddling with the button and zipper until they weren’t an issue. His lips grazed her neck up and down, kissing it softly as his fingertips finally reached her center.

She let out a soft moan when she felt him over her panties, tracing her lips over them and feeling her arousal “I’m sure they could wait a little bit longer” He said as he pressed a finger to her clit over the fabric “We need to take care of a few problems before that, don’t you think?”

He pressed his hips onto her, a soft whimper escaping her mouth when she felt his growing erection against her.

“So wet for me, my love” He groaned as her hand flew to the top of his hair, trying to find balance as she tugged on his curls “Always so beautiful for me”

“Luke-“

He opened his eyes just in time to catch her staring at him through the mirror with a desperate look in her eyes. It took him less than a second to spin her around and press her against the countertop, ceasing his lips into her like she was his last meal on earth.

She tangled her hands behind his head, fingers deep into his hair as he grabbed her by the back of her thighs, easily lifting her off and taking her to the king-size bed where they made sure to lose track of time between kisses and moans as they satisfied their needs with each other, over and over again until they fell through the abyss of pleasure together, whispering sweet confessions as their breath went back to normal.

It was easy to say that they were the last ones to reach the lobby. What was hard for them to ignore was the knowing looks and teasing smiles from their friends that were waiting for them for a good amount of time.

“Don’t say anything” Y/N threatened Ashton as he opened his mouth. But he just laughed

“If you want Luke to walk around with his fly open then sure, I’ll keep my mouth shut”

The ride to the party was filled with laughter and chit-chats. They were all in a great mood to finally have a mini-break in between shows and what better way to celebrate it than at a big party?

Luke stole glances from Y/N as she talked to Bethany. She looked beautiful with her black dress, making Luke proud and a little bit snug about him being the one who would take her home afterward.

But he knew that after tonight they needed to talk. And not “talk” like they usually do. No, this time he was going to express his concerns to her, his hopes for them, and confess his love for her over and over again. He wanted her to know how he feels, he needed to know where they stand and what she needs to feel more comfortable and what he can do to help her feel at ease.

He just needs reassurance, something to hold on to while he provides the same for her. In the end, he knew they would be okay.

After a few minutes, they reached the house of the host. Luke marveled at the mansion that stood proudly in front of him. When Y/N mentioned a party with some label associates, she never mentioned that the party was going to be hosted by the president and owner of the label.

He felt Y/N tug on his hand a couple of times before separating herself from him and going to stand next to the girls.

For a moment Luke forgot that they needed to keep appearances and couldn’t be together romantically in public. He could feel his heart aching as he watched her walk away with her friends, laughing together as they stepped into the party.

“Hey,” Michael said behind him, following the eyes of the sad man next to him “It’s just one night”

He tried to be comforting, but all Luke could wonder was: Would it be just for a night?

The party was wild. That’s the first thought everyone has in their minds as they step through those doors into a world of darkness mixed with neon lights, smoke machines, and three open bars scattered around the hall. People were separated into groups: The ones who were too drunk to stop dancing, the ones not drunk enough to start dancing, and the ones who were networking their way into the industry.

Everyone that was someone was at that party. Producers, artists, songwriters, performers, agents… You name it. It was a party for the big leagues and Luke could not help but feel out of place the moment he stepped foot into the scene.

“Hey! 5 Seconds of Summer. C’mere!” A voice called over the music.

Standing not too far from them there was a man, his bald head shined under the lights as he held a drink to his lips, beckoning the band to come over.

Y/N and the guys started walking towards the man without a second to wait, leaving Luke and their girlfriends to witness the interaction from afar.

“Who’s that?” Asked Luke, getting closer to Danielle as they watched their partners laugh with a bunch of men who were now surrounding the band.

“That’s Anthony Kellinghs” She answered, swiftly grabbing a drink from one of the trays carried by the passing waitresses “He’s one of the big bosses in the industry. Ashton said his team approached them not too long ago to see if they would be interested in changing labels and work with them”

Luke glanced back to the group. Y/N was standing next to Calum, talking about something that made Anthony smile even though her face was serious. He did not like the way that man was looking at her.

Anthony laughed loudly, making other guests turn his face towards them. Y/N and the boys shared a confused gaze as they laughed awkwardly along with him. The bald man kept laughing, clearly intoxicated as he lowered his hand and rounded his arm around Y/N’s waist.

Luke’s breath got caught in his lungs as he watched how Y/N’s body movements came to a halt and her eyes widened in discomfort, her smile seemed stiff but she didn't stop laughing or talking to the guy. Luke could feel his blood boil as he watched his girl in the arms of someone else, acting like nothing was happening and that everything was fine, in front of him.

“What the fuck?” He muttered under his breath. Debating on whether he should go and punch that dude in the face. No matter how important he was in the industry, he wanted him away from Y/N immediately.

But he didn’t move and neither did Y/N. Luke didn’t know if it was because she physically couldn’t or because…

No, he rejected that thought immediately. It was clear to him by her eyes that she was desperate to get away from his touch. And apparently not only to him because the moment that man put his hands around her Ashton and Michael called his attention away from her, moving a few steps back so Y/N could have more space to free herself the moment she could. Calum had his eyes on her, too, with his arm placed to his side as if he were to take her away from there at any second.

Yet the man did not move an inch away from her. Instead, his hand trailed lower with every word he spoke, until Luke couldn’t see it anymore. All he could see what’s Y/N’s uncomfortable face as she suddenly jumped forward, fear written all over her eyes.

Luke let out a curse as he took a step forward, ready to beat that man’s face to dust. But he stopped when he felt a hand on his shoulder.

“Wait!” Danielle said, eyes locked on the scene played in front of them.

Luke stared ahead and let out a breath of relief when he saw Calum taking Y/N away from the group and towards the bar, seemingly excusing themselves to get a drink. He saw how his friend’s arm rounded around her shoulders, making it impossible for her to look back and for anyone else to notice her face as they walked away with no intentions of coming back.

Luke lost sight of them as he watched them disappear into the party. “Good,” he thought “At least she’ll be safe and away from him” But that thought did not calm the rage he felt towards the creep that dared touch her in front of her friends.

“I’m going to kill him” He hissed, once again trying to step forwards but once again being pushed back by Ashton’s girl.

“The guys got it covered,” She said, her sweet voice laced with a warning as she whispered loud enough for only them to hear “They will handle it and make sure they never work with that man, ever. It’s not the first time this has happened”

“This happened before?!” Luke said, attracting some curious eyes to him. But he couldn’t care less about it at the moment.

The girls looked at each other and then at Luke. How could they explain to the man that this happens more times than Y/N would be able to admit? They knew first hand how the industry was full of creeps and disgusting men, having dealt with them in the past as well, but Y/N…

She was the front girl, the main focus of attention. She was beautiful, talented, hot… that’s all they saw, never caring about her caring personality, or how intelligent she was, how she was the driven force of 5SOS. She was more than her looks, she was a girl trying to live her dreams. But men only seem to see one thing.

“I’m going to check on them,” Kat said as she walked towards where Calum disappeared with Y/N. Bethany mentioned going to Michael to try and make them get away from the conversation they were still having with that fucker.

And Luke stood there, not able to do anything “Y/N wouldn’t want you to cause a scene, that’s why the boys never do it anymore. She knows how important image is for all of them and a scandal is the last thing they need right now. Especially if some “random dude” goes and punch one of the biggest names in the industry”

Danielle was right and he hated that. He hated that he couldn’t do anything to defend his girl because she didn’t want to be defended. But the fact that she knew how to handle these kinds of things didn’t make it any less wrong or difficult for him to ignore. More so because their relationship was still kept a secret.

Luke couldn’t help but think that maybe if people knew they were together, things like these wouldn’t happen. After all, the only thing men like Anthony respected was the presence of another man.

Ashton and Michael returned after a minute, both of them with their jaws clenched and eyes filled with the same feeling of powerless Luke felt.

“Where is she?” Ashton asked, standing beside Dani and holding her close by the waist, almost as if he were scared something might happen to her.

“Kat went to check on them, they still haven’t returned,” She said, comforting her boyfriend by running her hand up and down his arm.

“This is bullshit” Luke murmured, frustration lacing his voice as he grabbed one drink from one of the waitresses and drowned it in one go without flinching. He turned around and started walking away from the group.

“Where are you going?” Michael asked, half concerned and half furious from him walking away at this moment.

“I need air” He answered as he took another drink and walked through the garden doors. Not even sparing a glance back when Y/N called his name as she watched him go.

Luke spent most of the night going back and forwards between the main hall and the garden. He drank whatever was being offered to him and sat down on a bench as he watched the casual smokers come outside, accompanying him from a distance.

He knew he was being childish. He didn’t understand much about the industry, nor how people that worked in it were. All Luke knew was that Y/N was nothing like them; she was not greedy, nor was she a creep, she wasn’t evil or ill-hearted and she didn’t deserve what happened.

He wanted to be with her, apologize for his shitty behavior, and tell her that he loved her. Because he did. He loved her with all his heart and it hurts him to see her like that. But every time he stepped through those doors back to the main hall - every time more intoxicated than the others - she was nowhere to be found. Or she didn’t want to be found, but that didn’t stop Luke from looking for her.

And every time, wherever he found her, she would have company. Sometimes she would be with the boys and their girlfriends laughing along with some other group of people - usually men - that stood a little too close and personal with her. Other times she would be on her own, talking to some guy or girl he didn’t know, too preoccupied with her conversation to even notice Luke standing at a distance, looking at her with longing eyes as he tried to find the courage to talk to her.

Then, he would go back to the bar, order his drink and go back outside or with the group, tightening the grip on his glass as he watched the girl he loves being swept away in conversations he couldn’t be a part of, after all, he was just one of the composers and her friend. Nothing else.

The guys and their girlfriends tried to cheer him up, including him in conversations and inviting him to dance. They knew how new this was to him, having to remind themselves every once in a while when they caught his sad eyes dancing across the room on the looks of his fleeting love.

“She came looking for you a few minutes ago while you were outside,” Dani told him the third time he came by the group.

“Why didn’t she go out with me?” He asked, eyes on Y/N as she talked to Michael and one of the producers they met in London a few years back.

“She was going to,” Ashton chimed in “She walked over there but I think Niall caught wind of her and they started to catch up”

Luke clenched his jaw at the thought of Y/N with other men. His mind couldn’t help but to go back to all those articles about her exes, her possible new partners, her possible future partners. Cheating scandals, break-up songs, parties where she didn’t leave alone… All the things she refused to acknowledge came to the surface, hitting Luke in the face as he realized that they might not all be lies.

He hated to think about her that way, to think that he didn’t trust her enough or that she didn’t trust him enough or whatever the fuck was wrong with them. But as he saw how Y/N hugged a stranger, all his thoughts went out the window.

“Who is that?” He asked no one in particular.

“Who?” Bethany asked in response, following Luke’s stare towards her friend “Oh, that’s Josh”

“Josh? As in Josh Benthlow? Her ex?”

Beth furrowed her eyebrows as she saw the look of pure rage on the blonde’s eyes “Uh, yeah? But you got something wrong there” She said, “They never dated”

Y/N laughed at something Josh said, pushing him playfully on the shoulder as he kept telling his story. Luke recognized the look in his eyes; it was the same way he used to look at Y/N when they first met: Pure adoration. And, he didn’t know if it was the alcohol in his system that was making him see things that weren’t there, but he could swear he saw Y/N flirt back at him.

“Friends don’t act like that” He spat, taking another sip from his drink, already losing count of how many he had that night.

“Hey!” Beth called his attention, taking the drink from him “That’s enough now. Alcohol is making you act like a complete asshole”

“I-”

“I don’t care.” She said, interrupting whatever he had to say before he even said it “Look, I get that you’re getting used to all of this. But you need to stop with the jealous act right this instant. She’s famous, yes, they all are and that means that you will have to share her with the world whether you like it or not. It’s her dream after all, and besides Y/N would never do something like that to hurt you and you know it”

Did he?

Not long after the group decided to go back to the hotel, having already stayed at that party longer than necessary given that they have a show the next day. The ride back was quiet, everyone either being too tired to even speak or too smart to try and cut the tension that was being created by the new couple’s behavior. Even when Y/N sat next to Luke he didn’t acknowledge her, keeping his eyes looking outside the window the whole car ride.

Y/N was one of the first ones to get out of the car, walking up to the elevators and not waiting for anyone as the doors closed.

Luke clenched his jaw as he contemplated not going to their room tonight, fighting with the feeling of not wanting to see her and the feeling of never wanting to let her go.

“You need to go there right now,” Calum said, taking a step next to Luke but not looking in his eyes “Having been her friend for so long I can see that she’s upset… Nah, fuck that. Even idiots can see that she’s upset”

Luke scoffed “She’s the one that’s upset?” Voice laced with sarcasm.

Calum hummed “Guess not every idiot can see that” He pressed the button of the elevator and hoped in with Kat, not waiting for Luke as the door closed in his face, but not before saying “You’re not the only one hurting, you know?”

It took another 20 minutes for Luke to open the door of their room. Again, Y/N was nowhere to be seen, but the light coming from under the closed bathroom door let him know that she was there.

He sat at the edge of the bed, hands covering his face as he now wished he hadn't drunk as much as he did. His head was spinning, he couldn’t decipher if it were because of the alcohol or because of his intrusive thoughts that wouldn’t leave his head.

Y/N got out of the bathroom for what it felt like an eternity later. She was wearing her Spongebob pajama and her hair was tied in a messy bun. Her makeup-less face looked tired as she didn’t glance at Luke before sitting by her side of the bed.

They stayed in silence for another five minutes before she decided to speak.

“Are we going to talk about tonight?” She said, voice neutral of any emotion.

Luke scoffed “Now you want to talk?”

She ignored him “I didn’t see you all night, Luke. I was worried”

“Oh, you were?” He mocked with cruel sarcasm as he got up from the bed and started pacing around the room “Funny way to show it you weren’t around!”

“I wasn’t around?! Luke, you spent half the night outside! Every time I came over you were nowhere to be found!”

“And every time I was there you were too busy talking to other people”

“I was working, Luke!” She said with a groan, massaging her temple as she turned to look at him “It’s part of my job to make connections at these kinds of events. And if you didn’t notice, Calum, Ashton, and Michael did the same”

“Well, you must be pretty damn good at your job then!”

Y/N looked at him, shocked by the way he was speaking to her “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Luke was angry at her question. How could she not know? “Why don’t you ask Josh what I mean?”

“Oh my fucking GOD,” She said with the loudest tone he’s ever heard her talk “That’s what this is all about?! He’s a friend!”

“I was a friend, too and we still fucked!” Luke matched her tone of voice, probably waking the people in the room next to theirs.

Y/N laughed humorlessly “You have no right to-”

“And whose fault is that? Huh? Whose fault is that I cannot call you my girlfriend in front of other people? Whose fault is that I have to stand to the side and watch you flirt with every guy on earth just because “it’s your job”?” He asked “Y/N, I’m trying so hard for you to let me in and the only thing you do is push me away! Are you embarrassed by me in any way?”

“No,” She said, finally meeting his eyes and seeing no more anger in them, just an incredible sadness for both of them “No, of course not”

“Then why?” Luke asked, taking a step towards her and cupping her cheek with one hand “Why can’t you let me protect you? Why can’t I be with you freely? I know some things are hard for you to talk about, love. I get that. But I’m drowning here, not knowing what to think or what to say to make you trust me”

Y/N stayed quiet as she looked into his eyes before looking away. Luke sighed.

“We don’t have to talk about this right now. But we’ll have to do it eventually”

“I know,” She said with a string of voice.

“Sorry for the things I said”

“I’m sorry, too”

Luke wanted to kiss her, to comfort her. Even though he is still mad at her, he still has this need to protect her from the wrongs of the world. But she’s got to let him in first.

Instead, Luke placed a kiss on her head and walked towards the bathroom to get changed for the night. When he came back Y/N was already asleep on her side of the bed, her back turned to Luke’s side.

He let out a sigh as he turned off the lights, laying down facing the other side as he murmured a “Good night” Barely missing the soft sniff she gave in response.

The next morning Luke woke up without her by his side. He felt a tug in his heart as he remembered all the things he said to her, the cruel way in which he implied that it was all her fault when both of them had a bit of blame to put in their names. He wouldn’t be surprised if in the middle of the night she decided to leave and sleep somewhere else.

He grabbed his phone from the nightstand, ready to give her a call and apologize properly, hoping she’d pick up. But just as he was about to press the call button, the door opened.

Y/N walked in, sandwich and orange juice in hand. A small smile came to her lips when she saw him already awake.

“Hey,” She said softly, almost like if there were someone else in the room that was sleeping “You missed breakfast, so I bought you this. It’s now much but-“

“Thank you,” Luke said with complete honesty.

Y/N nodded, walking up to his nightstand to place the drink and the sandwich. But before she could walk away again, Luke grabbed her softly by the arm.

“Luke-“

“I’m sorry,” He said, his baby blue eyes looking into hers. He was sad to see no emotion in them compared with how shiny they were yesterday before the fight “I didn’t mean it”

Y/N let out a sigh as she sat on the bed next to him “No, you’re not” She said almost resignedly “And yes, you did. And it’s okay, I deserve it”

Luke shook his head, feeling even worse than before “No, Y/N I was out of place and-“

“You were, but that didn’t make your words any less than truthful. I hurt you, Luke. Even without wanting to” She said with a broken voice, but the tears didn’t come “But I want to change that. Tonight, we can talk after the concert. Okay?”

“I don’t want to pressure you” His hand flew to her face, placing a strand of hair behind her back. She smiled softly and kissed the palm of his hand.

“I know, but I want to” Finally, she got up from the bed and started walking into the bathroom, gathering some of her things. “We’ll start early today with some interviews and sound check, and the girls wanted to go shopping so they’ll meet us there. I will send a car for you before the concert and then we’ll talk. Alright?”

She grabbed her back and headed towards the door, giving Luke one last look and a soft smile before she left.

Luke didn't forget how she didn’t kiss him before she closed the door.

The day passed by and Luke was still in their room. He sat in front of the table with his notebook and pen, writing up words that, at that moment, reminded him of her.

He didn’t like how they were acting with each other. How quick everything went to shit after last night’s mistakes when words were louder than actions until those words became apologies.

Y/N said he didn’t mean his apology, and deep down he knew it to be true. He regrets the way he told her, admiring that he would have handled things a little better than he did. But he meant what he said about her pushing him away by not communicating. They were both trying but apparently, they sucked at it.

Truth was, there was no one to blame. Truth was, they were both at fault. And, truth was that he would still fall to his knees for her the moment she asked. Because he had never loved someone as much as he loved her.

When the time of the concert was almost upon him, he quickly jumped into the shower, ignoring all the beeps and rings of his phone as his thoughts and hopes filled his mind. He thought about what he was going to say to her, and he hoped that they could finally get past this and leave this whole situation behind; to start over and just be free.

He was putting on his shirt when his phone started beeping again, finally checking it to see what the fuss was all about.

Thousands upon thousands of notification flooded his screen, and they all said the same thing:

“Y/N AND MADDEN BACK TOGETHER?!”

“THE ENCOUNTER OF THE YEAR! MADDEN BANKS AND Y/N L/N SEEN TOGETHER AGAIN TALKING ON THE OUTSIDES OF THE VENUE”

“OMG Y/N X MADDEN SHIPPER REJOICE AS THE COUPLE SEEMS TO HAVE REKINDLED THEIR RELATIONSHIP AFTER CHEATING SCANDAL”

Luke felt as if an elephant was standing on top of his chest, losing his balance and falling to the bed with his phone in hand, unable to look away from his screen.

His breathing became elaborated as his eyes filled with tears as he read the tweets and article titles. He knew he shouldn’t click on them. He knew. And yet…

“Lead singer of the band 5 Seconds of Summer, Y/N L/N was last seen talking to her ex-boyfriend, Madden Banks, in a secluded alley outside the venue where the band is going to perform their concert tonight.

We last saw the couple last year around August when Madden announced their breakup after cheating scandals came out to the surface. None of the parties made any comments about it, but it was set to believe that Y/N was the one who committed the mistakes after a set of tweets on Bank’s personal account where it said that he was feeling “broken-hearted” by the situation and he hoped no one had to get through that ever again.

Now it seems that the past is the past! As Y/N and Madden were caught by paparazzi talking again, and by the looks on both their faces it seemed like their relationship was not over after all!

We are still waiting for confirmations from either of them but congratulations to the couple ❤️”

A set of pictures were attached to the article. All of them of bad quality and from questionable sources.

On the first one, you could see Madden smiling with Y/N’s back facing the camera. On the second one, Madden was closer to her, almost cradling her face as if to kiss her. The third picture had Madden pointing out the paparazzi, a surprised expression plastered on his face as Y/N appeared out of focus. The last picture had Y/N walking away with Madden following behind, both of them with angry faces seemingly for being interrupted.

Luke was gripping on his phone tightly, a sense of rage coming over him as he wiped his tears furiously and walked up the door. Turning off his phone before he could read Y/N’s message:

Y/N: it’s not true! Let me explain…

He did not go to the concert that night, nor did he stay in their bedroom, opting for sleeping in the room that was originally assigned to him.

His emotions walked him into a bar last night, letting him drown his sorrows in alcohol as he slowly drifted away from his senses. He doesn’t remember getting to the hotel, but he does remember not wanting to be with her that night. Feeling betrayed and used, what was the point?

It was pretty late when he woke up the next morning, too late for Y/N to even be in the hotel knowing that they still needed to do a lot of press before traveling to their next destination. It was sufficient to say that he was not going to go with them.

He was about to book a flight when he noticed his phone died while being turned off last night. He was in such a rush that he forgot to bring his charger with him, but he felt confident that it was safe for him to go back to her room now that she was gone. He would pack all his things and leave, he was not about to endure any of this shit anymore, no matter how much it hurts him.

When he opened the door to her room, however, Luke noticed that he was not alone.

“You didn’t come last night”

Y/N was standing by the window, looking at the street through the thin curtain, hoping she might catch a glimpse of Luke walking back to her. She was wearing the hotel’s robe and had her hair tied in a ponytail. Her voice was fragile, tired, and broken as if she spent all night crying.

“Good,” thought Luke “at least we’ll both be miserable”

Luke didn’t answer that, instead, he just asked “I thought you’d be doing the press tour”

She shook her head, her back still facing him as she sniffed “I couldn’t go. I didn’t know where you were”

He would’ve thought it was touching and he might’ve felt bad for her if she hadn’t shattered his heart the night before. So he said nothing.

“I needed you last night, Luke,” She said, voice a little firmer as she finally turned around. Luke’s heart ached when he saw her delicate figure, she looked sick, pale, and tired. Her eyes were puffy and her nose was red from all the crying. Part of him wanted to go to her and hold her, but her betrayal was still too fresh on his skin.

Luke scoffed “Sure you did” He didn’t intend for his voice to sound with such malice, but it was almost as if his tongue had a brain on itself “Was Madden not enough?”

“Stop,”

“Is he here?” He asked, voice mocking interest as he walked around the room “C’mon Asshole!” He called, opening the closet doors and walking into the bathroom “You won, motherfucker, you can have her! It’s not like it’s hard anyway”

Her eyes widened at his words, cheeks turning pink at the realization of the insult “Luke!”

“Was this part of your plan?” He asked, turning towards her with nothing but the rage inside his eyes “To bring me here to make him jealous? To make me fall for you so easily? Is that why we never went public? Ha! Should’ve known you just wanted a free pass to whore around while still making sure you have a secure fuck waiting back at the hotel”

Y/N froze. Not even Luke could believe the words that were coming out of his mouth, but he was too far gone in his own anger to process them or to take them back.

“This is the part where you apologize,” She said, eyes filling with tears she refused to spill.

“No, this is the part where I tell you to fuck off” Luke spat, taking a step towards her, not realizing how she flinched as she took a step back “You know, I tried so fucking hard for months to make you happy. And every day I read those fucking articles that were talking shit about you and every fucking day I told myself that those weren’t real. That you weren’t like that… surprise, surprise! Looks like the cat is out of the bag. Makes sense! That’s why you never wanted to talk, you never wanted to admit to what you did because you never take any fucking responsibilities for the damages you cause! I thought I knew you, at least some parts of you. Turns out everyone is right about you. Every fucking word of it”

He turned around, ready to grab his things and go, but the adrenaline was kicking in and he just couldn’t stop.

“Tell Madden that he’s an idiot for taking you back,” He said with his back turned to her “That he should’ve left your cheating ass alone. Let you get what you deserve”

“I never cheated” She mumbled, voice barely above a whisper.

He scoffed “Yeah, right”

“I never fucking cheated!” Y/N raised his voice, making Luke turn around to face her. Her face was red with tears and she had her fist clenched to her sides, knuckles white from all the pressure she was putting in.

“I never cheated on Madden! I never fucking cheated on you! On anyone! He cheated on me, repeatedly and with several people for all the course of our relationship! I never touched a person outside ANY of my relationships. I have been nothing but faithful to you and now you’re throwing that shit at me without knowing an ounce of my side of the story?!

You want to know, Luke, why I never tell the story as it was? Why it’s so fucking hard for me to tell the story even to the people I love?”

It was a challenge, he knew from the look in her eyes that she was not going to stay quiet any longer. She didn’t even wait for his answer.

“I was fucking abused, Luke! Physically, mentally, sexually… you fucking name it! During that whole relationship. Want me to tell you the details or you could figure it out yourself?! I was getting beaten almost daily! I had to hide the bruises and cuts in front of the guys as they slowly watched me fall apart. I had to lie to them for YEARS because I genuinely thought he loved me. He said he did so I believed him. It wasn’t until one night where he got too far that I had to tell myself that it was enough. But what could I say? I was so fucking embarrassed I couldn’t go to the media that calls me a liar every chance they have! I couldn’t go to the police because he has money and could easily get away with it! I was so fucking alone until I met you and… You took his side”

Luke felt like his heart was taking a punch with every word that she said. Every tear that fell off her eyes was like a knife in the back. The guilt was eating him inside out, crashing into him like a tsunami. He should’ve kept his mouth shut, he shouldn’t have let his emotions take the reins, he should’ve... He felt all of his emotions turn to mush, all but shame as he stared into her eyes knowing he was the one who fucked up.

“Y/N-“

“I needed you last night when he cornered me. I needed you by my side as I broke down backstage because you weren’t answering your phone. How do you think I felt when I came into our room and found it empty? I was ready to tell you everything and then you just decided that wasn’t worth it anymore. That I wasn’t worthy anymore. All without giving me a chance” She cried, shattering sobs running through her body as she remembered the feeling of hopelessness she had “Not only that, but I come to find this on your side of the bed”

She threw his notebook at him, he didn’t need to open it to know what she read. Already regretting leaving it there.

“Sometimes, you're a stranger in my bed

Don't know if you love me or you want me dead.

Some days, you're the best thing in my life

Sometimes when I look at you, I see my wife

Then you turn into somebody I don't know

And you push me away

Fight so dirty, but your love's so sweet

Talk so pretty, but your heart got teeth

Late-night devil, put your hands on me

And never let go”

She recited the words by memory, having read them over and over again as she waited for him to come back.

“Is that really how you see me, Luke?” She asked, voice broken as she looked into his eyes.

Luke felt his body tremble with shame as he looked at her. He has never seen her look so sad and fragile before, the smile he loved so much was gone and he knew he might never see it again. He wanted to scream that that’s now how he saw her at all. Those words were written out of frustration, out of anger. He wanted to tell her that she’s the most amazing, loving, strong, intelligent person he know but... how could he even look her in the eyes?

He knew that he went too far. That he should’ve given her a chance to explain what happened instead of just letting the media fill his brain with lies; lies he believed without question because of his insecurities. He broke the strongest girl he’s ever known, but she was still standing.

Despite the hurt, he caused her, she was still standing in front of him. Demanding answers he doesn’t know how to give. Still being so much braver than him.

“Y/N, I-“ He began, voice breaking as he was left speechless. How could he ask for her forgiveness now that he broke every ounce of trust she held for him?

“Luke, I think you should leave,” She said, rounding her arms around her torso as she looked back at the window. Unable to hold her gaze to him any longer.

“No,” Luke begged of her. Pleaded, even “Y/N, baby don’t-“

“Leave” She repeated more firmly “If I’m such a monster, the best thing we can do is for you to go home”

She turned her back to him once again, and he knew that he had just lost the battle he was too scared to even fight.

Y/N cried silent tears as she heard him gather his belongings and pack his bags, feeling as if she might collapse into the floor if she weren’t holding herself too tightly. If she concentrated, she could hear him cry, too, until he closed the last of his bags and walked through the door.

Because, after all, he would still go to the ends of the world if she asked.

Tags: @iknowyouthinkimbulletproof @mystic-232 @talksoprettyjjx @theshyspy @hoodhoran @flaneurcth @notinthesameguey @bubblegum18 @irwin-fletcher-ash @just-here-to-escape-from-reality @1980holland @myloverboyash @nicebasscalum @calumspupils @secretsicanthideanymore @the-ghost-of-ash @alltimesos @kingxnichole @givebuckyhisplumsnow @hufflehemm @girl-toxxic

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sagehaleyofficial · 3 years

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HERE’S WHAT YOU MISSED THIS WEEK (6.30-7.6.21):

NEW MUSIC:

Halsey revealed the details of her upcoming fourth album called If I Can't Have Love, I Want Power. The new full-length is produced by Atticus Ross and Nine Inch Nails’ Trent Reznor.

You Me at Six dropped a new track titled “Read My Mind” ahead of the release of the deluxe edition of their latest album Suckapunch. The band also released an alternative version of their song “Voicenotes.”

Yungblud released a cover of Madonna’s hit song “Like a Virgin” through his Spotify Singles, recorded at Sound City Studios in Los Angeles. The singer also recently covered David Bowie’s hit “Life on Mars.”

I Feel Fine revealed that they will be releasing their debut album The Cold in Every Shelter on September 10 via their new label Venn Records. They also released a new track off the album titled “Selfsame.”

Mod Sun released a new song titled “No Escape” in conjunction with an upcoming zombie-themed video game called State of Survival. It follows on from the release of the deluxe version of his latest record Internet Killed the Rockstar.

5 Seconds of Summer's Luke Hemmings revealed the details of his debut solo album When Facing the Things We Turn Away From. He also released a single prior to the release titled “Starting Line.”

Motionless in White released a new music video for their song “Thoughts & Prayers.” The track is taken from the band's latest full-length Disguise, which is out now via Roadrunner Records.

We Are the Ocean vocalist Liam Cromby recorded an acoustic version of the band’s song “Now & Then.” A second pressing of their album Go Now and Live is also being put out by Hassle Records.

With the release of his debut album Tell Me About Tomorrow, Jxdn released a new collaboration with Machine Gun Kelly titled “Wanna Be.” The highly-anticipated album dropped last week.

One OK Rock released an acoustic version of their recent song “Broken Heart of Gold.” The track served as the follow-up to their other single “Renegades,” featured on the Rurouni Kenshin: The Final soundtrack.

TELLE, the solo moniker of The Word Alive’s Tyler Smith, released a new single titled “Letting Go.” The brand new song features ex-Lydia vocalist Mindy White, currently of the band States.

Frank Carter and the Rattlesnakes revealed the details of their upcoming album Sticky. The new album will drop on October 15 and contains five vocals features from numerous artists.

Capstan released another new track ahead of the release of their upcoming album Separate. The track, titled “Alone,” features the vocal talents of Silverstein’s Shane Told.

TOUR ANNOUNCEMENTS:

All Time Low announced they will be joined by special guests The Maine and Meet Me @ the Altar on their UK tour later this year. The short run of shows will kick off in London on September 22 and end in Glasgow on September 28.

Twenty One Pilots revealed that they are going to be headlining Summerfest, taking place at the Amfam Amphitheater in Milwaukee on September 4. The show will be the band's first live performance since 2019.

Beartooth announced the details of a livestream following the release of their latest album Below. The event, titled “The Journey Below,” will be taking place on Monday, July 14.

Glassjaw announced that they are going to be bringing their 20+ year anniversary tour to the UK. The band will be taking over London's Kentish Town Forum for two nights, playing two of their albums in full.

Outbreak Fest announced the lineup for its rescheduled 2022 event. Taking place between June 24-26 at Manchester's Bowlers Exhibition Centre, the roster features Knocked Loose, Turnstile, Basement, Citizen, Loathe, Fiddlehead and others.

Enter Shikari revealed that they will be releasing a new concert film later this month titled Live at Vada. The film was recorded at Vada Studios, the same venue where they tracked their most recent album Nothing is True and Everything is Possible.

OTHER NEWS:

Bob Bryar, ex-drummer of My Chemical Romance, announced he is selling one of his old used drum kits. The kit was used during the band's performance at the MTV VMA's in 2005, as well as during some of The Black Parade recording process.

Beartooth announced a new graphic novel in conjunction with Z2 Comics, titled The Journey Below, to go along with the release of their latest album Below. The novel is currently available for pre-order.

Green Day revealed they have been made into Funko Pop! figures, modeled after their American Idiot era looks. The figures are currently available for pre-order through Big Apple Collectibles.

___

Check in next Tuesday for more “Posi Talk with Sage Haley,” only at @sagehaleyofficial!

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talkfastromance4 · 4 years

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Lost Without You-- Calum Hood oneshot

Copyright talkfastromance4 © All works is intellectual property of the author. All rights reserved. Any redistribution or reproduction or any part or all contents in any form is prohibited. You may not, without written expression and consent from the author, distribute works amongst other social media platforms

A/N: based off of Fly By Midnight’s new song Lost Without You. Give it a listen as some of the lyrics are incorporated in the piece!

Warnings: angst, moody and broody

Word count: 2,577

donate to my ko-fi here :)

Masterlist

Enjoy! :)

• • • •

Calum is a man of deception; the Houdini of keeping his six-year relationship hidden from the media sharks’ eyes. He’s the mastermind of averting their invasive questions of why he hasn’t found a special someone yet, what’s the hold-up, to the attention of this awesome bass riff he’s been working on. It’s not that he was ashamed of you or your love, he wanted at least one part of his life to stay private.

Part of his deception is keeping his lips sealed. He’s perfected the silent-yet-observant role of the band, only speaking when he deems it necessary and if it’s related to the band, Duke, or their music while simultaneously he was having a full conversation with you on his phone about how all the planets share the same sun.

For six years, your relationship worked amazingly well. He adored your compassion for his dream, always referring to you as his biggest fan which always made you laugh. It’s been six years of late-night calls, paragraphs shared of how much you meant to each other filled with promises of the adventures you’d have when you’re reunited again. It’s been endless voice notes of a new song he wrote, memories upon memories printed on polaroid’s and saved in a lot of albums on your phone.

For six years it worked until it didn’t.

Complacency became very apparent and the feeling of being stuck in one place crept up your neck and whispered in your ear while your friends were getting engaged left and right. While out and about you felt jealous of other couples who could freely kiss one another. Seeing the guys and their girlfriends cuddle while you were all out dinner left a burning hole in your heart while Calum was three seats away.

For six years it did work, but the comfortable bubble you were in for so long suddenly became uncomfortable and claustrophobic. It was a long break up that left you both teary eyed, your makeup cleaned off from the salt in your tears, and your voices hoarse from talking. You tried talking it through, but the only solution seemed to be taking a break.

A break from your best friend of six years, a break from a love so genuine.

It’s been six months since that miserable night where half his heart was taken and Calum doesn’t want to be by himself these days, he doesn’t want to think of himself this way without you. But he has been thinking about it, every second, every day. He’s been thinking of you constantly.

And you’ve been thinking of him too. Recently you’ve been seeing a new guy, someone from the gym you go to who has shown interest multiple times. He’s the opposite of Calum, so you thought you’d give it a try. Something different, something new.

“Why’d you decide to give me a chance now? I’m glad you did, don’t get me wrong, but I’m curious,” Matt asks while you’re out for coffee.

“I haven’t been alone since I was eighteen,” you confess. You felt a release as you finally opened about your relationship with Calum, leaving his name anonymous so Matt wouldn’t blab to the press you were dating a member of 5 Seconds of Summer.

Your heart burst open of your whole relationship, six years of memories, love, a friendship set on fire, finally released into the open.

“Then why did it end?” Matt asks while he walked you up to your door. You hadn’t realized you talked about your relationship for the whole date, how pathetic is that?

Instead of answering him, you pulled him in for a kiss that traveled to your bedroom. Opening up about Calum opened your sadness of the breakup as well. The whole time you were with Matt, you compared him to Calum in your mind. His fingers were clumsy while Calum’s were sure and precise, years and years of bass playing under his belt did wonders. His hair was thin between your fingers while Calum’s was thick and fluffy. Matt’s movements were jerky while Calum’s were fluid as water.

When it was over, you rolled over to gaze out the window, tears brimming your eyes because for the first time in six months, you felt lost without Calum. There’s another body where he used to be, and you can’t stand the thought. Thoughts of Calum left you awake until Matt kissed you goodbye and left.

Calum’s over at Michael’s, he’s on his fifth white claw and he feels the alcoholic bubbles taking effect. In his impaired state, he pulls out his phone and scrolls to your text conversation, six years’ worth of conversation still held in his phone’s memory.

Him: I miss you when it hurts

Knowing you won’t reply but hoping that you do, he stumbles to the hammock. With one foot on the earth he sways from side to side staring at the stars through the trees. He’s wondering if all those stars have been in the sky since your relationship started when his phone does the two-toned ding reserved only for you.

Excited and nervous all at once, he almost falls out of the hammock reaching for his phone that falls between the netting of the hammock. Cursing under his breath he stretches until his fingers grab hold of the device, the light of the screen illuminates his face.

Her: I’m sleeping in your shirts

His heart skips a beat, his mouth goes dry just imagining you in his shirts. He hasn’t seen his sensation shirt in two years because you stole it and claimed it yours. Every couple months he’d get it back so that it would end up smelling like him and you’d steal it all over again. He loved seeing you walk around your place in nothing but his shirts, he loved the way your ass peeked out from the hem.

Him: but seeing you would make it worse

He impatiently waits while your gray bubbles pulsate on his screen. Then they stop and then your pretty face is on his screen followed by your ringtone. Surprised, he nearly drops his phone again before answering.

“Hello?” he asks breathlessly.

“Can we still talk on the phone sometimes?” you ask.

Calum falls out of the hammock this time because he hasn’t heard your voice in so long. Six years he’s been hearing your voice in his head, on his phone, in his ear while you whisper dirty things. Six months without your voice has been hell and hearing it now, it’s like he’s at the gates of heaven.

“Of course, we can,” he finally responds climbing back into the hammock. He licks his lips. “How are you? Are you okay?”

“Yeah…I’m okay,” you respond softly. He knows every nuance of your voice; he can tell you’re telling him the half-truth. “Are you okay?”

“I’m better now.”

Over the next several weeks, you’ve been talking on the phone more frequently. You’re still seeing Matt every now and then, just to give you something to do and hopefully not think of Calum. That’s damn near impossible.

You’re on the phone with Calum while you’re sitting out on your balcony watching the sun go down. Both of you haven’t said a word in about five minutes, but hearing his breathing makes it feel like he’s right there with you. The two of you always had comfortable silences of enjoying each other’s presence.

“Can we be the exes that still stay friends?” he asks.

Your feet slam to the floor that were perched on the railing at his question. It filled you with butterflies.

“I’d like that, Calum. I’ve missed my best friend,” you admit shyly.

“He’s missed you, too.”

Matt spent the night and after your morning coffee, you laid on the floor staring at your ceiling fan as it rotates. The cool air blows on your skin and it reminds you of all the times you and Calum would lay on the floor or the grass, heads next to each other, as you talked about random things. Matt found you like that and asked what you were doing.

“Come lay with me, let’s talk,” you say reaching for his hand.

You feel his hesitancy as he lays next to you.

“What do we talk about?” he mumbles in confusion.

“Anything. Don’t you think it’s weird that Mars has the same sun we do?”

“No,” he snorts.

Suddenly, your door opens and with a rush of panic you sit up expecting to see Calum thinking that it’s him. Part of you wants him to see Matt and the other part of you wishes Matt weren’t in the picture at all. Crestfallen, it’s one of Matt’s friends who came by to pick up a video game he had. Matt leaves you on the floor and you send a text to Calum asking him about Mars and the sun.

He replies quickly with how that fact still blows his mind and you smile.

Ten months have gone by and Calum is pacing back and forth in his kitchen. Duke is following his motions, tongue lolling out and panting while the rest of the band follow the dad and dog duo. You’re coming over for the first time. For the first time since the breakup he’s going to see you and it has his stomach reeling.

“Why are you freaking out so much?” Michael asks.

“Because, it’s been so long! It could either go really well or end horribly,” Calum huffs continuing to move back and forth.

“Will you stop pacing?” Ashton demands, “you’re making me dizzy. It won’t end horribly. You’re already broken up.”

That stops Calum instantly. He glares at his best friend for his blunt remark, Michael and Luke share the same look.

“What?! I’m not wrong! What could be worse than that?”

“We’ve only started being friends again…she could decide she doesn’t even want that,” Calum sighs leaning against the counter. Duke sits at his feet.

“You’ve been friends for six years…yeah, you were also a couple, but I don’t understand how you can just stop being friends with that much history,” Ashton shrugs.

“Yeah, you don’t understand,” Calum shakes his head. Only you and he know where your relationship stands. He’d give you the moon if he could, lasso it and all that like from that movie you love so much.

The doorbell rings and Calum stands up stick straight, he breaks into a cold sweat. Michael offers to get it and when he returns, it’s only Andy and Sarah. At every doorbell Calum waits for you to walk through his door again but is met with disappointment when it’s another party guest.

Feeling defeated he collapses onto the couch, swiping through apps on his phone while the party blurs around him. Duke hops up and lays in his lap.

“Hey guys. Where’s Calum?”

Upon hearing your voice, Calum and Duke both perk up with Duke bounding off his lap and running to wherever your voice came from. Calum stands slowly, hearing your sweet words to Duke as he rounds the corner. Seeing you after all this time is like he can finally breathe again. You’re giving Duke kisses and Calum notices that your hair is different, the new cut and style takes him by surprise but you’re beautiful as ever.

Then your eyes lift to his and he swears he felt the planets align within him. When you smile it’s like he’s seeing the sun for the first time.

“Hey, you made it,” he says gruffly then mentally slaps himself. He should have said something cooler, more riveting but you smile all the same and stand up.

“Hi. Yeah, I did. I wouldn’t miss it.”

After grabbing you a drink he ushers you to a quiet corner where he awkwardly asks for a hug. You share a timid embrace, but it still feels like home. He wants to hold you forever but reluctantly lets go so you can catch up some more.

For the whole night you stay in that spot, unless he left to refresh your drinks, or you grabbed a snack that you shared on the same plate. As the last people left, you and Calum were left alone on the couch, the lights dimmed, and the music changed to something more chill.

“I thought you would’ve brought Matt with you,” Calum says. The other guy’s name leaves a bitter taste in his mouth and his next sentence tastes like bile. “I want to meet him.”

“I thought about it,” you sigh leaning your head against the couch. Your head presses against Calum’s arm that’s slung over the back and he sucks in a breath at the contact. “But it’s not working with him.”

“No? Why’s that?” he tries to sound polite.

You stare at him for a long time, taking in his dark eyes, the slight curl at the ends of his hair, his tattoos peeking from his shirt and the three moles you’ve always loved to kiss.

“I’m lost without you,” you confess.

He stares back for a beat.

“You’re lost without me?”

“These ten months have been so hard. I think about you all the time, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve wanted to come over and beg for you to take me back. But I hurt you. I know I did. I hated that night we broke up; it was one of the worst nights of my life. But why would you want me back after I threw in the towel because I was feeling affection deprived? That’s not fair. And then when you texted me…I felt so happy. This whole thing was stupid, and I understand if you don’t want—”

Calum silences you by pressing his lips to yours. You kiss back eagerly, welcoming the comfort of his soft lips against your own, your fingers immediately flying into his hair. His own hand cups your face, you melt at the warmth of his skin and a chill runs through you when his tongue slips between your lips. The world stops, the music drifts away as you kiss your best friend, your soulmate after so many days apart.

The kiss leaves you both breathless and gasping for air as you break apart, but you don’t move far, his forehead rests on yours. You caress the back of his neck while his thumb caresses your cheek.

“I’ve been lost without you, too, cupcake,” he mumbles and your heart rushes at his nickname for you. “I was nervous as shit before you came, I didn’t think you were going to.”

“I almost didn’t come,” you chuckle, “I kept imagining I’d see you with some new girl hanging off you.”

“The only girl I need is you.”

You’re kissing him again, then ask on his lips, “Maybe we should--?”

“Baby, we should start again,” he finishes for you. “We’re both different now. We’ll be different, we’ll…we won’t hide this time. You’ve been a part of my life for so long, you held my childhood that I didn’t want to let go of yet.”

“It’s not letting go, it’s moving forward,” you trace his eyebrows then poke each one of his small moles that you love because they’re like stars.

“Move forward with me?” he asks, nudging his nose against yours kissing you again. You nod against him as he pushes you onto the couch. Your love lost was found again.

• • • •

Taglist: @galcalirwin @cashtonasff5sos @thecurlsofgod @myloverboyash @rotten-kandy @tea4sykes @jannimoeller3 @loveroflrh @iovehemmings @cxddlyash @princesslrh @here-for-the-uproars @katiaw2 @g-l-pierce @fairyintheglass @gosh-im-short @banditocth @dezzym17 @koalacal @lukeisbaby @spicycal @mysticalhood @notinthesameguey @wastedheartcth @atlcalm @itjustkindahappenedreally @calumance @babylon-corgis @thew0rldneedsmcreycghurt @lanternlover2 @istaywithmyjonas @calteahood @sarcastically-defensive17 @another-lonely-heart @calumhoodaf @frontmanash @philthepegacorn @mantlereid @lukedorkyhemmings @addietagglikesbands @kikixfandoms @sanrioluke @mayve-hems @morguelth @haikucal @thatscooibaby @meghanrose05 @idontneedanyone @dinosaursandsocks @cassie-sos @suchalonelysunflower @burstintocolor @zhangyixingxing1 @dead-and-golden @mymindwide @everyscarisahealingplace

**if your url has a strike through it’s because your blog didn’t show up as a tag! :(

#calum hood oneshot #calum hood angst #calum angst #calum fluff #calum 5sos #calum hood writing #calum hood 5sos #5sos writing #5sos fanfic #calum fanfic #calum fic #calum hood fanfic

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rebelwith0utacause · 4 years

Text

Another Day, Another Sinner To Pay

Hi, lovely people of Tumblr. I may or may not have written something so filthy, I won’t be able to see myself in the mirror for at least a week. This is my first time writing smut, so please go easy on me.

Reader x Luke Hemmings x Machine Gun Kelly in American Satan AU

2.5K

Warnings: don’t read it if you can’t handle smut, bad writing or you’re underage

Special thanks to @lukeisbaby for mentioning this pairing a few days ago, making it impossible to function until I had this written down, as well as giving it a read before I unleash this baby on you.

You knew that you could be a little judgmental at times. Some called it being an elitist, but you were pretty sure it was just your superior taste in music. You liked dirty bass lines and double pedals, gritty vocals and distorted guitars. You couldn’t care less about the romantic pop bullshit and rapping wasn’t music in your opinion. Making sure you voiced your opinion was at the top of your list of priorities, though.

It was one of the hottest summer nights that season and the humid air made your mind hazy. The two glasses of Zombie you’ve drained definitely had something to do with that, too. You were at your friend Johnny Faust’s place, celebrating the release of his band’s latest album, and the house was packed with artists and producers from almost every genre.

That didn’t intimidate you, though. The liquid courage gave you a million and one reasons to pick a fight with the two blondes hanging out in Johnny’s backyard. They were both towering over you by at least a foot, slowly losing their patience with your incessant jabs about their music. You couldn’t help yourself, each time you would open your mouth and piss them off, their jaw would clench, making the muscles in your lower belly clench as well. You knew that you weren’t talking smack about their music anymore because you hated it, it was just because you liked seeing them react to your brattiness. You got a kick of the narrowing of their eyes. You got wet when you saw them breathe through their noses to contain their fury.

You were on your way to say that the only rapper that might have a bit of musicality to his songs was Eminem when Colson interrupted you. “Why do you have to be such a brat?” Bingo. “Do you get off on being a bitch to everyone at this party?”

“As if,” you faked an indignant scoff. “Just because you can’t admit that your music is lame, doesn’t mean that I’m not right.”

“Just because your excuse is lame, doesn’t mean that your panties aren’t soaking wet right now.” You turn your head towards Luke, a little bit surprised by his straight-forwardness. Out of the two, he was definitely the quiet one. And you had to admit, if you weren’t wet by now, hearing him talk about your soaking pussy definitely did the trick.

“Ugh, you wish,” you say over your shoulder and turn your attention towards Colson who’s now looking at you with a smirk on his face. Your next retort gets lodged in your throat when you feel a hand creeping up on your inner thigh. You can feel Luke’s body moving behind you, feeling his mouth angle towards your ear, your eyes moving to lock onto Colson’s.

“So you mean to tell me that if I, hypothetically, lift my hand up a bit, I won’t find a wet patch on your panties?” Colson’s smirk just grows bigger, seeing your eyes bug out as Luke’s hand creeps up. You hear the groan as soon as you feel his index finger touch your lips.

“Damn it, Kells, you have to feel this for yourself. Not only has this slut been dripping while insulting us, she actually had the audacity to do it commando.”

Your mouth lets out a sound of distress as Colson corners you against Luke, followed by a moan as he drops his hand to join Luke’s.

“No shit,” he says, dragging the pad of his middle finger from your opening to your clit. Your knees almost buckle as he starts to stroke you in a fast rhythm. Your breathing becomes labored, your eyes at half-mast, captivated by Colson’s stare, and your head falls back toward Luke’s chest as he starts to pump two fingers inside of you.

The feeling of both of them almost tips you towards the edge and you let out the tiniest whimper, lifting your hands to half-assedly push at Colson’s chest. You know that no matter how hard you tried, you wouldn’t be able to push them away, and that thought scared you as much as it excited you. You were pretty sure that there were eyes on you three from the other party people, but you just couldn’t bring yourself to care.

“What’s the matter little girl, cat got your tongue?” you hear Luke whisper in your ear. “Are you gonna be a good little slut for us and finally shut your mouth?” In a last act of defiance, you turn your head towards him and whimper out a “No.”

His reaction comes faster than your hazy mind can process. He’s removing his fingers from under your dress and forcefully shoving them in your mouth. “You sure about that?” You’re almost glad that your mouth is stuffed with his digits to stop the moan from escaping. One of the most powerful orgasms you’ve ever experienced rips through your body, making the two men laugh at you. “Guess we found a way to shut her up.”

-----

Getting through the throng of people in the living room without falling on your knees is difficult but made possible with the large hand braced on your lower back. Colson is guiding you to one of Johnny’s bedrooms, Luke walking a step behind the two of you. The lingering elation from your orgasm makes your heart beat fast and your thoughts turn silent and you’re welcoming this feeling because you’re almost sure that it’s only going to get better.

You take three steps into the room and you stop. Colson steps in front of you while Luke walks further in, looking for the light switch. He slowly puts his hands on your collarbones, gliding them upwards. You can feel his fingertips tangle in the hair at the nape of your neck, putting some pressure and tilting your head back. “Why aren’t you on your knees yet, slut?”

Taking the hint, you loosen your knees and drop to the floor, sitting on your haunches. The Doc Martens on your feet make it uncomfortable, but you’re too focused on his next command to care. You can feel his thumb rub against your bottom lip, smudging your red lipstick on the side, giving you a toothy smile. “There that’s better.” You almost smile up at him, feeling like a good girl, but he cuts it short when he starts dragging you backward and slams your body to the bedroom door. He moves a step closer, shoving his clothed crotch in your face. You raise your hands to shove at his thighs and squeeze your eyes shut, but you know there’s no escape. Your head still tilted, he uses one hand to open his fly and pull out his cock, rubbing it on your lipstick-stained cheek. “Open up.” You loosen your jaw the tiniest bit and he’s already feeding you his dick. He won’t stop pushing forward and you start to feel the nerves creeping in. Your heart starts to beat faster, your breathing accelerates and your head is stuck between a door and a very hard place. His thumb and index finger pinch your nose the second his tip hits the back of your throat and your eyes start to tear up when you squeeze them closed, just a part of your poor gag reflex. You can feel the insides of your mouth fill with your spit as well as his precum, not helping you with that slight panic attack at all. He starts moving faster, fucking your mouth while you’re on the verge of passing out. Black spots appear in your vision, but he forcefully takes his dick out, spreading your saliva all over your face. Feeling like you can finally breathe again, you start to register his voice “...up, get your ass on the bed.”

“No, don’t get up. I want you to crawl on your knees to me. Let’s see how much you really want this.” Your eyes move toward Luke, sitting on the side of the bed, legs spread wide. You start to move, feeling sharp pain in your knees every time they make contact with the floor. Colson bends down and yanks at your hair like a leash, dragging you to Luke.

You’re crumpled on the floor in front of him, feeling like all of your energy has left your body, while buzzing with nerves at the same time. In no time, Luke’s pulling you by the back of your neck and pushing you over one of his thighs. He presses your head in the bedsheets to his left, locking your legs with his. His right hand lifts the edge of your dress over your hips, leaving your pussy exposed to his and Colson’s view. You’re getting even wetter if that’s possible. “Oh, this is priceless. Look at this mess, Kells. Such a dirty girl.”

His digits enter you once again, gliding as effortlessly as they did before, only this time, he uses a third finger on you. It’s a forceful invasion of your private parts and the logical part of your mind tells you that you should find a way to get him to back off, but you only manage to arch your back and slide his fingers even deeper than they previously were. “So fucking eager.” You can feel his fingers curl inside of you, finding that special spot and repeatedly pressing against it, making your fingers curl into the bedsheets and your thighs uncontrollably shake. His husky chuckles make you feel an intense humiliation, but you can’t stop yourself from crying out his name.

The stimulation is almost too much and before you know it, the pressure in your lower belly disappears like a blinding supernova, leaving you breathless. You can feel his grip on your legs slip due to your juices running all over your legs, making a mess around your feet. Every time you try to gasp for air, he presses on that spot again, making you squirt once again and robbing you of your breath and any conscious thought you might have had.

You have nothing left to give, but you’re rudely taken away from your bubble of bliss by a harsh slap to your clit. The metal from his rings makes it ache and it also sends a zing throughout your nerves. He smacks your asscheeks twice in succession, leaving handprints.

Colson grabs you by the hair once more, pulling you to the middle of the bed on your hands and knees. He takes up your left, while Luke gets up on his knees on your right side. They land smack after smack on your ass, turning it a cherry red, making you squirm and moan with every blow. You can feel the shift in the energy when Luke starts to pull your dress over your body, keeping it tangled around your hands while he sits himself in front of you. Colson gets behind you, squeezing your sore flesh. He starts to grind on you and every time he goes up, the zipper of his jeans scratches your clit, making you moan in Luke’s face. As if they’re reading each other’s thoughts, Luke makes you take his cock at the same time Colson enters you from behind. The force of his thrust makes you bob on Luke, eliciting a moan from both of you. He has one hand on your head, guiding the tempo and the other on your tied-up hands on his chest, leaving you stretched out like a cat for them.

The sounds of skin slapping skin and slobber reverberate in the room, making everything ten times louder in your head. “Stop, I need to be inside her too.” Luke slides underneath you, waiting for Colson to pull out. You spread your legs as far as they can go until you can feel him enter you. You’re gyrating on him, working his cock, getting yourself worked up, when you feel Colson start to poke your back hole. It’s not the most pleasant feeling you’ve felt, but you’re so turned on at this point, the fullness is welcome. They start a rhythm, pinning you in place. Your face is poised above Luke’s staring straight into his eyes. You’re breathing the same breath, his exhales, your oxygen. You can feel yourself getting there, and you know that he’s ready to blow when you see the blue in his eyes almost turn white. You know that he can sense it, too, your pussy is milking him hard and your irises are most likely red by now. He’s breathing through his orgasm, making you whimper when you feel his seed inside of you.

It’s always like this. He makes you feel so full, filling your body and your hollow soul at the same time. Colson is almost forgotten until he plops down on top of you, spent. Your thighs are a mess and your muscles ache from being stretched so much, but you can’t get yourself to move. Your eyes start to close, and the last thing you remember before laying your head on Luke’s chest and falling asleep is him muttering “Such a good girl for me.” and kissing the crown of your head.

-----

You feel the tips of his fingers lazily trailing down your lower belly. His hand moves down to your heat, cupping you and making you moan. “Is he gone?” you ask, squeezing your eyes shut when he starts to play with you. “Yeah. He said he’s going for a smoke and never came back.” He picks up the rhythm, running circles around your clit and kissing up your shoulder to your ear. “What did you do to him, anyway?” he whispers, giving your ear piercing a tug with his teeth.

The smile on your face is instantaneous. He’s working you even harder when you moan out “Might have been a few STDs and a permanent case of blue balls for the next week or so.” He huffs out a laugh from behind you. “You little devil.” “You know it. Just giving him a taste of what it feels like to actually fuck with the devil. I hate it when people use my name in vain.” Your body melts into his and you’re cumming with a soft wail.

-----

“Where do you think you’re going?” You turn to see Luke lying on his side on the bed, seeing you get dressed. You slowly pull your dress over your thighs, careful of the red marks on your right cheek. “I’m heading out to see my other favorite angel boy, I’ve corrupted you too much. Just look at my ass, Luke. Angels aren’t so violent. Plus, Mikey’s got all of the toys. Sorry love.” You walk through the door and right before you close it, you can hear him say “You’re insatiable.” before he plops down on his back and closes his eyes to return to dreamland. You smile to yourself. You catch Johnny’s eye, silently telling him that you’re heading out. Another day, another sinner to pay.

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heartbreakgrill · 4 years

Text

That Smile; Luke Hemmings, Pt. 4

description: in which songwriting is over, but there’s still lyrics left to be written.

a/n: FINISHED SERIES

You glared at the wall across from you, fist clenched in your lap, teeth grinding together. The bass bounced from wall to wall in the studio, in tune with your fast-beating heart. You resisted the urge to scream, to curse the world, to quit your job and move to western France with all ties cut to anyone you ever knew.

Especially him. His stupid face was grinning at the carpet, skinny jeaned legs crossed over one another boot clad foot bouncing in the air. His hair was ruffled, messy from running his hands through it time and again, pushed behind his ears by a pen on his left side. Those stupidly gorgeous blue eyes were trained on the floor, too, almost nervous to meet anyone’s eyes.

They wrote a song without you- well, Luke wrote it, he even composed all of the instruments. Then, while you were working with another client for a grudging week, they recorded it. Now, they were playing it for you with proud shoulders, like, “Look! We can do it without you!”

This was your last week together. After a little over six months of bonding, partying, drinking, falling, and, yes, songwriting, it was coming to an end. You had never grown so close to a set of clients before, and you were terrified at how much it was going to hurt, saying goodbye. You hadn’t spoken to Luke since the week prior to your absence. You texted in the group chat about a few ideas, spoke to Calum both on the phone and in real life, and had even gone on a double date with Michael, Crystal, and a god-awful redhead. Ashtons girlfriend had taken friendly to you after a few mores parties, so youd even seen her for lunch and shopping with Crystal a few times.

But, he just wouldn’t speak to you.

You didn’t know why. You racked your brain for reasons and answers, afraid to even ask the questions. He averted his gaze when you looked his way, shrugged off your compliments on his outfit or lyrics, hadnt even liked your latest Instagram post. You were craving for his attention, pushing up at the universe which was destroying your year.

Two heartbreaks, and it had only been six fucking months.

Calum, who was sitting next to you- of course- tapped his fingers against your wrist to get your attention. You looked away from Luke, who looked back at you. He was disappointed to see you staring at Calum, a small smile lifting the corner of your lips. You murmured something, Calum smiled, and you looked back to Luke.

He went to look away, but simply couldn’t. He was avoiding your pretty face because he wanted to get detached before he had to say goodbye entirely. He knew you guys could hang out, and you were planning to come to Ash’s next weekend, but it wouldn’t be like it had been weeks before he got your confession. Plus, he was going home to Australia for a month or two, before the album was released, tour started, so his heart could mend.

He loved you, and you loved somebody else.

“So?” Ashton spun around in the studio’s chair, cheeks pudgy with a smile, “What do you think?”

You looked away from Luke, “Oh, it was really good. Really...good. What’re you gonna call it?”

Luke felt brave energy on the tip of his tongue. “Why wont you love you,” he said, directly into your gaze.

You furrowed your brows, your head tilting involuntarily. “Wh-“

“Yeah, we think were done now. That was the last song were gonna have on the record.” Michael interrupted without even meaning to.

“So today is your last day?” Your breath hitched, eyes already bleary with goodbyes.

Calum slung an arm around your shoulder and pulled you into his side, “Yeah. It is.”

You leaned into him without even meaning to, but Luke noticed. His bravery turned to venom, dripping off his frowning lips when he stood, headed for the door, and said, “Better get to confessing, Y/N.”

You stared at his empty seat, cheeks pink with embarrassment and sadness. Calum’s eyes screwed up with confusion, “What?”

Ashton and Michael looked towards you as you bent at the waist, cradled your torso. Calum got a better hold on you, hugging you as you began to cry. Ashton joined him on the other side, sitting on the arm of the couch. He rubbed your back, pushing hair out of your face.

Michael spoke, “What does he mean by confessing?”

“God,” you wiped at your cheeks, “God, I’m sorry.”

“What?” Ashton inquired.

You sat up a little bit because your chest hurt so badly, “I lied to Luke and told him I was in love with Calum because I love Luke and I didn’t want to make things weird. It was after my boyfriend broke up with me, so I was scared, and tired and my heart hurt so bad. And now Ill never see him again because he’s going back to Australia. And he didn’t even tell me that! He told Calum! Calum told me, and I feel stupid.”

Calum chuckled, sharing a knowing look with Michael, “Y/N, you dont have to apologize for defending yourself. You deserve the right to.”

“Yeah, its just human nature. Plus, I’m not sure it would make things weird,” Michael pursed his lips with quirked brows.

You looked up, “What?”

“Y/N, are you still scared?” Ashton playfully pinched your arm, smiling down at you when your eyes flickered to his.

“Tired?” Calum squeezed you in his arm.

“N-no, I’m just sad,” you admitted and pushed your hair back behind your ears.

Calum helped pull you from the couch, Michael gathered your things into your bag, and Ashton handed you Luke’s abandoned hoodie. Calum spoke as it happened, “I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want to freak you out or scare you, but his plane leaves in six hours. Ill send you his address-“

“I did you one better; Its in your Google maps,” Michael grinned like a child when your head popped out of Luke’s sweater, which Calum had pulled over your head.

You looked to Calum, confused, “Its raining, dont want you to be cold.”

“Get to his place, Y/N, drive safely, but drive quickly. Get there and tell him before its too late,” Ashton hugged you tightly.

Michael did, too, and, finally, Calum squeezed you in his arms. “Go, on, then.”

You hesitantly stepped towards the door, a small smile meeting your eyes, “Yeah?”

They nodded before you turned on your heel, taking off like a bat out of hell.

As you drove, it all began to make sense. The song he wrote, the way he looked you in the eyes and told you what it was called. The way he held you after you got sick, the way he looked at you when you were with Calum. The longing in his eyes when he saw you leaving the studio, at parties when you were dancing. He’d dance with a few times, but when youd get too close, he would linger away, deflated, defeated, and alone.

The way he smiled at you.

When you arrived, the rain slowed to a drizzle. Your name was still on the guards checklist, and he pointed you towards Luke’s house with ease. You quickly texted Calum you were there before turning off the car and abandoning your phone on the passenger seat. You jogged to his front door, stopped with your fisted hand against it.

Your eyes shut, rain falling from your eyelashes and hairline like tears. With three rasps on the door with your knuckles, you stepped back. The door hesitantly opened- he must have seen you in the peep hole. His eyes racked your body, almost smiling when he saw his damp hoodie clinging to your frame, before he met your eyes.

“Y/N, I’m sorr-“

“No, okay?” You stopped him with your hands and voice, “Just, no. Don’t speak, just let me get this out, okay? Luke, I am sorry for lying to you. I dont love Calum, unless you count as a friend. He is an amazing guy, but, Luke, he’s not you.”

Lukes eyes widened, their familiar blue color shining down at you.

“I have denied my feelings for so long because I am so afraid of you. You are tall, and so sweet, and insanely talented. And you look like fucking Aphrodite. You’ve been with so many pretty girls, so many talented, pretty girls who just- I dont look like them. Plus, I was scared because I was broken up with and, even though I’d lost feelings, it just hurts knowing someone doesnt want you anymore. I-I, dont know, I think I was just holding myself back because. There’s no reason, just because. I know I’m not a size 0 and I know I’m crazy loud and I get drunk sometimes and I can be kinda annoying, but, Luke, I never want you to sing Why Won’t You Love Me? and think of me. I want you to sing Valentine and Better Man and just think of me.”

Luke stepped forward, enveloped your hips in his hands. You pressed yourself against his chest before he responded, “Those size 0 girls just aren’t you, either, Y/N. They’re not loud or crazy or, yeah, even annoying. They dont make my heart leap when they sing or my fucking head spin when they laugh or look at me. You make me smile so much more than they could. Fuck fear, Y/N, just let go and give into it. There’s nothing to be worried about because I will be there to catch you, okay? I cant just think about when singing those songs, though. Y/N, you are in my head all damn day, it’s fucking grueling because I just want to hold you in my arms and kiss you all the damn time.”

“Then do it.”

When he pulled away from you, eyes screwed shut in overwhelming joy and satisfaction, that damn smile was grazing his lips. You kissed it off of him, clutching at his shoulders before your hands moved around to the buttons on his shirt.

“Gonna invite me in?” You whispered against his lips, squealing when he lifted you in the air and pulled you inside.

TAG LIST: @oopsiedoopsie23 @pixiiiiee @kingxnichole

#luke hemmings fluff #luke hemmings x you #luke hemmings x reader #luke hemmings x y/n #luke hemmings imagine #5sos blurb #luke hemmings blurb #5sos x reader #5sos x you #5sos imgaines

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sunshinelukee · 5 years

Text

Everything Is Evolving

Luke for Glass Man Magazine

(I typed out the article because the text was so small haha, sorry for any mistakes)

It’s been over eight years since 5 Seconds of Summer (5SOS) first shook up the pop music world, but the quartet doesn’t plan on slowing down anytime soon. With their fourth studio album on the way, the hunger for the band’s unique pnuk inspired take on the conventional pop sound is growing, and its lead singer Luke Hemmings isn’t even close to finished with the band’s ambitious reign of its constantly evolving sub-genre.

Born in Sydney, Australia, 23-year-old Hemmings first caught people’s attention as an artist when he began uploading musical covers to YouTube in 2011 with fellow band members Michael Clifford and Calum Hood. Telling me about their start as musicians, Hemmings isn’t afraid to express his slight dismay looking back, “Honestly, we didn’t put much time into them. We just wanted to put something out. It was just kind of messy, we just would be like on an iPhone with a guitar player and singing, I guess. Michael was the one with a guitar and he was the one with the iPhone, so we were just recording them on that. We would just do one take, and be like ‘OK, that’s cool.’ It wasn’t until Ashton the drummer in the band would direct us more that we realized that this would be way better if we put more effort in.”

However, Hemmings does note that he thinks the chemistry between them as a band was what sprang them into the public eye, and less than two years later the band signed a contract with Sony/ATV publishing. Their first single Unplugged reached number three on the iTunes chart in Australia, despite having no real promotion or media marketing aside from Facebook and Twitter - an impressive fact. Describing these first years to me, the musician tells me about his constant drive to improve and evolve, “I feel like for us we strive to be better all the time. I think that’s very important for a band, especially for an item in this landscape, where everything is evolving and changing. I was stoked when we played to 50 people at our first couple of gigs. Your idea of a ‘made it’ moment kind of changes, which is fortunate, otherwise you’ll never progress.”

This willingness to grow as a band is what has kept 5SOS going in their almost decade long career. With the recent release of their single Teeth, part of their forthcoming album, the band moves towards a more industrial pop sound, while keeping in tune with their signature mix of punk, rock and pop influences. When asked how he would describe his sound, Hemmings laughs, “Oh, jeez! We started as a four piece pop rock band and I think that every album is different but I would still think we are a pop rock band. We have really homed in on making unique important parts that really mix up each song. I really don’t know how I’d describe it, but something like that!”

Refusing to be put in a box, Hemmings’ song writing capability and blatant dismissal of what defines pop has put him on the map as one of the least conventional stars on the scene. This album, nameless so far and set to be released next year, marks a new age for 5SOS and their sound, with Hemmings telling me, “I think it’s just and ever-evolving thing for us. What we thought was kind of staple sound of Youngblood in that whole album campaign and we kind of just went in with that mindset and tried to make it really coherent.” The musician goes on to reveal his creative process for writing and producing the new album, and the problems that come with it: “Everything goes side by side. Every time we try to write an album we try to evolve it lyrically and melodically and see what we can do as a rock band in a rock space. It’s a difficult thing to do and it’s a hard thing to do to get that balance.”

Aside from music, Hemmings also stands out for his unique approach to boy band style. Not one to follow the crowd, the star takes a hands-on approach to fashion, even talking to me about how he dyed his own socks pink with food colouring before a show, laughing, “It was actually not glamorous at all! I was doing it myself in the dressing room.” Telling me his fashion mantra, “Make do with what you can!” he lists his biggest fashion influencers, showing a special adoration for seventies glam rock. “I love the new age stuff, like leather pants with the big chains and stuff, but it kind of depends on what albums I’m in on. I kind of work in to it, you listen to it, like David Bowie and what he was wearing, it does vary and it’s kind of ever expanding, but these are a few of them.”

Last year, Hemmings performed with his band for 24 hours of Reality: Protect Our Planet, Protect Ourselves, a project which brings together activists, scientists, celebrities and performers to explore the climate chnge crisis and its ever-growing impact on the planet. The star is quick to tell me he stands firmly behind the ethos of the event, “I think it’s fantastic. I think as an artist you have a certain responsibility to stand behind the things you feel are important.” he says. Later, he also tells me that music can play an important role in the movement, “You know, we always do a very simple thing like making music, but people love it and it makes people happy and that’s awesome, but we can also use that to promote a great cause and that ticks all the boxes. It was amazing to be a part of that.”

Although only 23, Hemmings has been an influential figure in pop since 2011, stepping into the limelight at 16, telling me, “The first album was a difficult time,” due to his early start in music. However, when asked if he would give himself any advice or change anything from the start of his career, Hemmings insists he has no regrets: “On one hand maybe I would give advice, but I sometimes think that everything happens the way it was supposed to happen. I don’t think I would change anything or give advice. Obviously there are things that were done wrong and things that I could have done better and things that I wouldn’t do a second time around, but I think that’s just how it’s supposed to be. I think it was a very natural way of doing things. It was a fun time, you know. I don’t think that I would go back and make a change.”

Looking towards the future, Hemmings shows an interest in experimenting more with the production side of music, not surprising considering his flair for song writing, “I think I have personally started writing for other people and kind of getting more on the studio side, to guide and collaborate with other artists and stuff like that.” he says. However, the musician assures me that fans don’t have to worry about 5SOS separating anytime soon: “I think for us as a band we’ve been together for 10 years as 5 Seconds of Summer, which has been a while! I think we will have a few special things coming up, our live shows are getting better every time we do them. I think we have a lot coming out and a lot of stuff to do and I think we’re going to be around for a little bit longer. I think this band has always done our best to stay relevant in a pop space but also trying to serve our fans.”

#5sos #luke hemmings

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jxst-saying · 5 years

Note

What about working for the boys and the fans ship her with Luke and they say they are just best friends but end up realizing they love each other in soft rn :(

A/N: This had me fucked up. Also, too in–depth to just do in a one part little drabble, so I wrote it in multiple parts! If you want the next part, just go ahead and request it here!

(Part Two is now available: here!) (And so is Part Three: right here!) (And so if Part Four: right here!)

[+masterlist]

@mukeclifford: @Luke5SOS and @y/t/n are SO cute!!!!! they’re totally dating there’s no other explanation that’s it that’s the tweet

@wackycalum: I don’t have a problem with @Luke5SOS and @y/t/n being an item, but lying about it is fucking messed up. Just be honest to your fans. Don’t lie. We’ll find out eventually.

@rAiNbOwAsH: how cliché is it that the social media manager is messing around with @Luke5SOS what a way to keep her job

@bitchluke: honestly people that are hating on @y/t/n for absolutely no reason are just jealous bitches she’s a professional doing her job let her be even if she and @Luke5SOS are dating that’s their business (but i do think they’re fucking cutE)

Y/N. Social media manager to well–known band 5 Seconds of Summer. Currently rumored to be dating Luke Hemmings, aforementioned band’s front–man. Actually, let’s make a correction to that statement: Always rumored to be dating Luke Hemmings, front–man. It probably (read: most definitely) had something (read: everything) to do with the fact that the two of you were always together and always ended up having your picture taken. Together.

Maybe everyone else saw something the two of you couldn’t and didn’t.

There was just something about the way the two of you––clicked. It had been that way since the second you got the job. Somehow, you and Luke always just gravitated toward each other. It was like magnets. You were the north pole; he was the south. In any crowd, you were always the first face that Luke searched for; the first hand he reached for; the first voice he sought out amongst thousands of screaming fans. It all started with just one photo from two years ago. All of you were at the airport. Hundreds of people were scattered around with their suitcases and carry–ons and airplane tickets. Calum, Michael, and Ashton were all in the security line getting patted down by TSA at JFK. They were headed to Europe; you were staying behind in the city for a while. Luke, however, was standing in front of you right before the security checkpoint line with his suitcase at his side and his duffle bag on the ground. Some fan must have seen the two of you and taken the snapshot before uploading it. That was the only thing that made sense. It was probably the look in his eyes that they saw: the one that spoke of a myriad of unsaid words and confessions and admissions of truth, bottled–up emotions, fear, and heartbreak. That one.

You, in your complete naïveté and blindness when it came to the entire situation, chalked it up to just Luke not wanting to leave a close friend behind. Europe was always a special place for the two of you. Midnights in Paris; early mornings in Rome; evenings in London; afternoons in Berlin. There was always something so incredibly romantic about it all––traveling in the late night to another country. Sometimes, it felt like the two of you were running away from it all like some modern–day Romeo and Juliet. But then the light of day would spill through the windows of the airplane and the rough landing of touch down would shake the two of you from whatever reverie you both daydreamed about whenever you had the chance. (Not that either of you would ever dare admit that.)

So, that was that.

You could easily explain that photo. Luke wasn’t too keen on leaving his good friend and social media manager behind in a different country. You had the same look in your eyes for nearly the same reason. And because you weren’t so trusting of four boys having unlimited access to their own social media accounts with absolutely no repercussions whatsoever. That was a gut–wrenching thought, in and of itself. And that was all.

But that photo then went viral and––well––the rumors came shortly after that and stuck. More rumors meant more photos meant a vicious cycle that neither of you could escape from.

And maybe that was why you were, once again, staying behind in NYC while the four boys were on an airplane to Europe. More specifically, that was why you were sitting in your boss’s office with your legs crossed and your hands fidgeting nervously in your lap. You knew what this was about; it wasn’t that hard to put two and two together. With new music coming out, the last thing the band––and the executives––needed was the rumors about you and Luke taking center stage instead of the upcoming single. You understood that; really, you did. But that definitely did not mean that you were any keener on sitting in the principal’s office ready for whatever detention they were going to hand out to you.

“Y/N, you have been doing an amazing job as the band’s social media manager. Really, you have.”

“Thank you,” you mumbled.

“That being said, we do need to adjust our course. I am sure that you are aware of the rumors going around about you and Luke Hemmings. All the photos and tweets and mentions. Your Twitter mention activity has increased by 67% as of late. That’s remarkably convenient for the band. Their mentions have increased nearly 85% since the rumors started up again. But, right now, with the single about to be released, it isn’t so convenient. Actually, it’s not convenient at all.”

“Yes, I’m sorry about that. I didn’t realize that––”

Your boss interrupted you with that fake smile on her face. “We’re going to need something from you, Y/N. What we’re going to need,” she stood up and walked around to the opposite side, leaning against the desk with her ankles crossed in front of her. This was the part of being called to the principal’s office that you definitely didn’t like. “What we’re going to need from you is less involvement. Less involvement will mean less photos and less photos will mean less rumors, and all of that put together will mean that news about the upcoming single will be front–page news and not meaningless and contrived photos of you and our front–man.”

Less involvement? How would that even be possible as the social media manager? Her job was to be the definition of involved. If the executives were wanting less involvement, she wouldn’t be able to do her job. She wouldn’t be able to do anything.

“But I’m the social media manger,” you said. “How am I supposed to be less involved?”

She smiled. It was fake, the kind that flight attendants gave you when they were two seconds from taking you off the plane. “Ah, yes. That is another part of the equation. We’re going to be giving you promotion. You’ll be based out of LA. So, pack your bags! You’re headed to the West Coast!”

“A promotion? To what?”

“You’ll get all the information when you get there. The company will pay for your AirB&B until you find a suitable residence. Your plane ticket and conformation e–mail have already been booked and sent to you on company expense. It’s a direct flight from JFK to LAX, so don’t worry about that. And we’ll also take care of your apartment here. Furniture will be sent to you as soon as you find a place to live, and we’ll pay off the rest of your lease.”

“Why?”

“Because you’re getting promoted, Y/N. That’s a big deal. We help out our big fish here, you know.”

“But I’m not a big fish. I’m just a social media manager for 5 Seconds of Summer.” You still weren’t all that sure what was going on. All of this wreaked of some sort of convenient cover–up. With you out of the picture, there were no rumors about the two of you together leaving all the spotlight for the new single and upcoming album and later tour. It was all picture–perfect in the eyes of the executives. Even you could see that.

“Not anymore, you’re not. This’ll be good for you, Y/N. Trust me. Maybe one day you’ll be sitting in this office. You never know!”

“So, basically, you’re firing me from my job and giving me a desk job on the opposite end of the country just because of some stupid rumors.”

“Doesn’t matter whether they have any evidence behind them. Rumors spread because they’re just that––rumors. All people need to think that something is true is their own belief in the rumor. And you just being around Luke gives them just the evidence they need to run wild with it all. Don’t think of this like a punishment, Y/N. Think of it like … the next step in your PR career. It’ll do you some good. Now, if you don’t mind––”

You understood her unsaid sentiments. Get out of my office. Pack your bags. Go to L.A.

So, you did just that.

You walked the twenty–seven blocks back to your apartment, packed your tweed weekender bag and your pink rolling suitcase, printed out your ticket, and stood in the threshold to the apartment that you had lived in for three past three years. (Although, saying that you lived in that apartment might be a stretch; it was more of a home base that you just ghosted through from time to time.) But even with that, it was your home. It was the place that you and Luke had ordered late–night Chinese takeout (pan–fried pork dumplings, lemon chicken, Mongolian beef, Vietnamese doughnuts). And the place that you and Michael and Ashton had a three–a.m. water balloon fight in the living room, knocking over and breaking your flower vase mid–fight. (You won.) And the place that you and Calum had Ghost Adventures marathons until the sun would filter through the blinds on the right side of the living room. Most importantly, it was the place that you had come to view as your home whatever that meant at the end of the day. So, standing in the door was maybe more than a little heartbreaking. It was only 731 square feet, but they were yours. And now? Well, now, you were being banished out of the kingdom and sent to exile.

Perhaps that was a little dramatic. But, for you, it felt like the truth.

You shut the door behind you and left the apartment building that you were all–too–familiar with and caught a cab to JFK.

“Leaving the city or just a vacation?” The friendly cab–driver asked as he pulled into the street.

You sniffled and stared out the window, catching your last view of the Empire State Building as you did so. The sunlight glinted off the tall metal building in an annoyingly tragic and romantic sort of way. Memories of the time that you and Luke climbed all the staircases to the very top of that building flashed through your mind like a supercut. Heavy breath, burning legs, racing heartbeats, and your hand in his. It was up to the jury to decide whether the racing heartbeat was because of the flights of stairs or the hot hand she was holding onto. (Her bet was on the stairs.) “Leaving.”

Who even knew if you would ever be allowed to return?

“That’s such a shame. Well, either way, I’m sure the universe has something amazing for you in store. I just know it.”

But without this city, without your home, without all those memories that you were speeding past left and right, you weren’t so sure.

REQUEST PART TWO!

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