#Oh yeah I hyperfixated on this ( has a normal relationship with Thing. is able to focu

[giratina-and-the-skys-bouquet]

[avelera]

#what a concept#I wonder if hob would get flashbacks to say 1589 and not being able to hold dream's attention#maybe they've been together a couple of decades and gotten into certain rhythms#we've seen dream in the comics be very intense in the beginning but then drift back to creating for long periods of time#a sort of honeymoon period if you will#hob loves his life in the waking so he's totally okay with this and is content doing his own thing for maybe even months at a time...#...until he suddenly starts wondering if this isn't just the relationship naturally cooling down a little and it's actually dream losing#interest in him. I wonder if he'd start doing all sorts of things to get dream's supposedly waning interest back#like being extra romantic or even just trying to be different and more interesting#heck maybe even trying an art or creative type job thinking about how much dream values that (he knows him well by now) or even thinking#about how calliope was dream's longest relationship and was that maybe because for a long time they were creating together?#dream is totally oblivious of course. and changes nothing about his behaviour which possibly does hit hob hard for a moment thinking dream#really is losing interest#yeah hob is very resilient and good at change but he is very emotional and does get to pretty bad places often when bad stuff happens to hi#as for hob still being hob... I wonder if that would be hard in practice?#hob has almost never been himself for long periods of time that we know of. even at the meetings he's telling dream about his century and#still playing a character basically#I wonder if it would be hard to have to reinvent himself and be a different person and then come home to dream and be himself#I wonder if sometimes he meets dream and still has a mask on.#much to think about - @sb-essebi

These tags are so thought-provoking! Love the idea that Hob is always sort of playing a character, at what point does that mask feel like a second skin? At what point are you the mask?

And I know the temptation in a sort of fluffy fic would be for Hob and Dream to hit the first speedbump of Dream's hyperfixation meaning they go months apart and Hob has a crisis and does silly stuff to get his attention back and then at some point they have a conversation and figure it out.

But man, to me it would be so interesting to see (or write... oh no, new oneshot idea...) a scenario where Dream realizes it's been months since he last saw Hob or checked in on him and *he* is starting to have Alianora flashbacks, and assumes Hob would be the one to move on only for Hob, in true centennial meeting fashion, to greet him with the biggest smile like nothing is wrong at all, yeah, he gets it, the older he gets the easier it is for him too to get really focused on a project and not realize that months or even years have gone by.

Like, I'd love to see/write a scenario where they're a middle aged couple and then some, like their periods of puttering around the house, doing their own thing is actually beyond the normal mortal span, and Dream is stunned to learn that no, Hob isn't upset. And not, he's not drifting away either. They're just very much their own people who live a really fucking long time but Hob will always be there and overjoyed to see Dream again. Dream needs some time to himself? Awesome, Hob's got his own stuff too, they can reconvene for a dinner date at the end of the week (or year) and it'll be like no time has passed at all because that's love, baby. He did it for hundreds of years, he's got plenty of practice, and if it means Dream not feeling suffocated or inadequate, all the better.

Just... weird immortals, ok? Weird immortals who don't act like a clingy teenage couple. Weird immortals whose sense of time is totally fucking bizarre at times. Weird immortals who basically adhd/autistic and both have their hyperfixations in the dream world and the waking world and are actually relieved to be with someone who understands and that they won't lose over the fact. Maybe before Hob had to sort of hyperfixate on his partner because they were with him such a relatively brief time, he sort of made them his special interest, or he spent long years doing a project instead, but didn't really have relationships when the relationship wasn't the focus of that lifetime. And now he's got both. It's super weird and he's also nervous about fucking it up, but learning Dream is nervous and might also lose track of time and show up in a year apologizing about missing dinner last night might be, I dunno, in some ways more romantic than your standard flowers/chocolate/every-moment-spent-together fluff?

Plot bunny idea but… what if Hob has an identity crisis after he and Dream have dated more than 30 years?

Like his relationships have always had an expiration date when he has to fake his death and leave or otherwise abandon the other person. Maybe there were a few exceptions where he stays with someone who “knows” until they get old but even then the relationship changes, inevitably.

He’s never been with someone as unchanging as him.

Would it be a little terrifying? A lot terrifying? It’s as close to “actually grow old with someone” as he can get, with the whole “not growing old at all” thing. They’re aging at the same pace, something he’s not even had to think about as an option in almost 700 years.

Suddenly it’s not about making the most of your brief time together, it’s a marathon not a sprint. It’s continuing to be interesting. It’s accepting the change in someone else when it’s a much slower to near nonexistent change and it’s not defined by aging the way the others were.

Even if Hob is resilient and bounces back quickly or even sees this as a good thing, an amazing thing, that’s gotta hit hard at some point, right?

Edit: I should add, what if it’s not just being with the same person, it’s being the same person with that person? Like, every 10-30 years, Hob becomes a new person by necessity, one would assume (this is admittedly somewhat more fanon than canon but it follows logically that any immortal with a day job would have to switch it up from time to time to stay under the radar).

On the one hand, I’m the first to say that Hob is probably overjoyed to be with someone who knows who he is and who has constantly known who he is through all his eras and personalities.

But even then, those were for very brief meetings.

Does Hob have an identity crisis when he’s Hob and he’s still Hob with Dream 30 years later? When he can’t escape from himself, when the joy of having that one person with whom he can always be himself, his literal self without lying about his age or accomplishments or failures, is great and wonderful but also really uncanny valley strange for him all of a sudden? He could always escape his old baggage, except at the centennial meetings but those were so brief. (Heh, get it, brief lives oh no…)

Hob hasn’t had to deal with someone knowing his embarrassing childhood memories in over 600 years. It’s great but also must be so weird to have a partner who knew you back when and back when is the 1380s. No one alive knows he was called Hobsie once except Dream. There is no escaping the Hobsie allegations the way he once could in a few decades minus the occasional centennial meeting. It’s great but it must be so weird.

[eirikaanemo]

Venti’s a Superhero (GN)

1) You’re in law enforcement

The two of you have a pretty typical hero-officer relationship. He catches the supervillains, you cart them off to prison. It’s not a big deal and you don’t think much of it.

Or, rather, you wouldn’t if your co-workers would just leave things be. However, they keep pushing you to be the one to interact with him. Something about him liking to work with you specifically, which is ridiculous.

Sure he does flirt with you and drops the cheesiest pick up lines ever. And sure, he does smile a lot when you’re around. But it’s not like he’s serious about it, right? He jokes around by flirting with villains after all, so how do you know this isn’t a joke too?

It’s honestly kind of hard on you because you’ve found yourself falling for him. Who wouldn’t, honestly? He’s strong, charming, and just a really nice guy. It has nothing to do with the way he laughs at your stupid jokes or protected you fiercly the couple of times you were specifically targeted in an attack.

But when he shows up in front of the police station with a ukelele and sings you a cheesy love song he apparently wrote himself, you have to face the truth. He does, in fact, actually like you. The flirting was playful, not pretended. The cute superhero guy actually likes you back.

It’s kind of overwhelming honestly. So when he asks you on a date right after you’re kind of speechless. His face falls when you apparently take too long to respond and you have to chase after him as he walks away, dejected, to reassure him that yes, you’d love to go on a date with him.

“Why did you decide to wear your superhero costume on our date again?” You ask him, hyper aware of all the stares that the two of you are getting. The press are at the cafe doors, only kept out by threat of legal action from the owner of the establishment. Thank goodness they’re apparently a big fan of Venti and the work he does. Also, Venti is apparently a regular here. Who knew?

He takes a sip of his dandelion tea and glances out at the press nervously. “Well, I guess I’m just worried about doing an identity reveal for our first date. I was thinking maybe third or something.” You blink and a smile spreads across your face. “Oh? So you want there to be a third date before our first date is even over?” You tease him. His face flushes red. “Yeah,” he admits. “I can’t picture myself with anyone else. I’ve fallen for you and I can’t get up.”

2) You’re a journalist

You have always loved superheroes. They’re just so cool! Someone with a secret identity working a double life to serve and save the people around them? How awesome is that! And so when you move to Mondstadt and found out that they have their very own superhero, Barbatos, you are absolutely thrilled!

And, even better, your boss knows about your love of superheroes and assigns you to be the journalist representing the company on superhero related matters- including Barbatos!

So you take to your new task with gusto! This is exactly why you became a journalist! You will get all the best scoops and make your company proud. And if this involves showing up at all his fights and following him on patrol, well, that’s just doing your job, right?

Meanwhile, Venti, or Barbatos, is starting to be seriously concerned about your mental and physical health. Are you obsessed? Is this hyperfixation unhealthy for you? Are you overworking yourself? What if you get hurt from one of his fights? What is he supposed to do in this situation?

In the end, he decides to take a minute to talk to you about it during his regular patrol. He’s relieved to find out that yes, you are okay, and that you’re really just a super big fan. Eventually talking to you becomes a habit.

As time passes, you start putting less and less private details into your articles and stick to more public knowledge and juicy bits you get from battles and about villains. The stuff he tells you on patrol stays with you as the two of you get to know each other better. Soon you’re good friends, and maybe are edging into more.

It was a night almost like any other, except for how it wasn’t. This time he’d picked you up, bridal style, and flew both of you up onto a rooftop. Now the two of you are taking a well deserved rest stargazing together. “And there’s sagittarius,” you point to a constellation in the sky. You were fascinated with stars a couple years ago and had a wealth of information you could share with him.

“Sagittarius, huh?” He murmured. “Right there?” Now he was pointing at it too.

“Not quite,” you reply. You wrap a hand around the hand he’s pointing with and adjust it’s direction. “Right there.”

When you don’t get a response, you turn and look at him, only to find him as red as the apples he loves so much. It seems to get even worse when he notices you looking and he stutters a bit before he is finally able to spit out what he’s been trying to say for weeks.

“I really, really like you.”

3) You’re a fellow superhero

You are a superhero called Torque who has total control over cars. Your weapon arsenal consists of fifteen different toy cars that you can shrink and grow at will and use to knock villains off their feet. Sure they have more tricks to them, but you can’t give all your secrets away, can you?

Your specialty is evacuation, but you’re also good at keeping supervillains on their toes. Getting run over by cars doesn’t tend to be fun. So you can distract them from the other hero they are fighting. Because of this you make excellent back up and are often on call.

He is better in combat situations because of his aerokinesis. His abilities make him great for emergency response because he can get to the fights quickly and take immediate, safe action. The level of control he has makes him incredibly versatile too.

The two of you end up working together very often. He will show up early with you coming in not too long after. You will take over evacuation and protecting the citizens, allowing him to completely focus on the villain. As soon as you’re done evacuating, you join in the frey.

Your teamwork is legendary among the hero community and you’re a very popular duo in the eyes of the citizens. Famous for prioritizing civilian safety and quick takedowns, you’re effective and efficient. So far as most anyone knows, you’re just good friends, despite 80% of your fanbase shipping you.

In reality though, you’re already married. It’s a secret because you don’t want your identities to be compromised and your different relationship levels in and out of costume add another layer of safety to your disguises. If they knew, though, they would love how domestic the two of you are at home.

You slip into your home through the window. A relieved sigh escapes your lips as you close the window behind you, only for you to nearly shriek as someone suddenly wraps their arms around your waist and blows in your ear. Venti laughs from behind you. “Ehe, you’re always so fun to surprise.”

He smiles into your shoulder and holds you unusually close. The smile seems a little strained. “Today was close, are you okay?” He asks you. Oh. He’s talking about how you almost got hit today. Usually you’re fast enough to avoid hits like that, but you got distracted while evacuating and almost didn’t see it coming. “I don’t know what I’d do without you, so be more careful, okay?”

4) You’re a hostage he saves

The two of you know nothing about each other at the time. You’re a regular citizen of Mondstadt who was going about their business as normal until you got kidnapped.

It all went so fast. One moment you were walking down the street, the next you were being held hostage with a knife to your throat. While you’re terrified, he rescues you as quickly as the villain got you.

There’s just something special about being saved by a superhero. As someone who had been crushing on him for a while even before being rescued, it was all a bit too much for you to comprehend.

He happens to have just the biggest crush on you out of costume, not that he ever planned to tell you. But there was something special about being able to save you, being your hero.

If either of you thought your crush couldn’t get worse, you were dead wrong. The media is all over it, spinning dramatic love stories about how he’d apparently been especially careful with you and you’d given him the look.

You start following news about him more frequently and he keeps a special eye on you the times he happens to spot you on patrol. Daydreams about each other are more common now and your mutual pining reaches new levels.

You hear a sharp rap as something hits your window. It continues for a couple time before you get curious enough to check out what’s going on. Apparently someone’s been throwing rocks at your window. Opening the window, you peer down to see who’s there and nearly get hit in the face. Thankfully, Barbatos catches the rock before it hits you.

“Whoops, sorry,” he apologizes. “I didn’t mean to almost hit you. I was just trying to get your attention.” He pulls a bouquet of flowers from behind his back, cecilias. “I got this for you! Hopefully you like it as much as I like you!” The blush dusting his cheeks has nothing on the warmth that covers your face. Are you sure you are not dreaming?

[mcrmadness]

This is just me talking about (my) asexuality and aromanticism and mainly about how I figured I'm aroace. I'm from Finland and recently turned 30 so my experience and "lgbt+ history" might not be what you know it as, especially if you are not from Europe, or if your native language is English.

Also this is highly personal, so I doubt anyone here will have 100% same experience. But that's fine because remember: we're all individuals here and these are NEVER universal. You're still valid even if you wouldn't relate to what being aspec is to me.

It might be IS a long post so beware, but I've just been feeling like writing down some thoughts so here we go...

What I have been able to track is that I was 17, in 2008, when I first stumbled upon the term "asexuality". I don't remember exactly how, but I just remember reading about it and immediately going "yeah that's me". But what I do remember is that no one talked it being about sexual attraction. Basically how understood it was: asexuality = sex-repulsion.

I was 17, and somehow I knew I was sex-repulsed, but at the same time also thought I'm just a minor, so it's normal to be sex-repulsed. But even after turning 18, I don't recall ever feeling sexual attraction. I didn't think of myself as a "late bloomer" but just as someone who just has no interest towards sex. At some point I became really anxious of men, however. Nothing has ever happened to me* but still I, for some reason, developed terrible fear of men. I'm afab and just did not want to be seen as an object, and it made, still makes me, terrified to think someone might look at me and have Emotions. I know that we can't control our brains, I mean, I can't look at someone and force myself to feel attraction - just like those who do feel attraction, can't force themselves to stop feeling attraction. They can only control their actions. But yeah, I also had horrible (sexual) intrusive thoughts due to my generalized anxiety disorder at some point, which did not really help. They got a bit better when I came into terms with my asexuality and aromanticism, but sometimes they still come at me and it's never fun, but at least they're not as strong as what they used to be.

*(Unless if you can count that as sexual harrasment when, CW, I was 11 and a classmate was "into" me and tried to touch my face and talk "sweet things" to me but made it into a show despite me being uncomfortable and usually crying cos as a neurodivergent I didn't know how else to react.)

But anyway, back to the topic. So for years I understood asexuality as sex-repulsion, but I guess it's because I, well, am a sex-repulsed ace. So if I'm sex-repulsed, why would I then look at someone and feel something if I'm repulsed by the thing anyway? Like, it probably can't get any simpler than this :D And I know today that it's not as simple anymore. But that was 2008, at school (in ~2005) they only talked about gays a little, on one page in a sex.ed. book that otherwise was maybe 100 pages long. Only one page. About gays. And it was basically "Some boys like boys or some girls like girls and it's totally fine." and that was it, but the overall assumption was that everyone likes someone. And also there were no romantic orientations. Liking someone = both sexually and romantically. Not liking = not a thing except when you were depressed or otherwise mentally ill, or autistic or mentally disabled (which is a SUPER ableist take btw). I don't remember teachers ever talking about this, but it could also just be my adhd, maybe they did mention, but I just don't remember. At least in my notebooks there is no mention of this, everything was very much heteronormative and amatonormative, and also there was only two genders. I don't remember ever hearing about transgender people, apart from foreign documentaries and in them they were always portrayed as some shocking freaks of the nature, and loads of wrong terms were used. And this is still the mid and late 2000s we're talking about!

So this takes us to the other part aka aromanticism. Back then asexuality was not only sex-repulsion but also merged together with aromanticism, because people didn't talk about romantic orientations yet. So asexuality was not only sex-repulsion, but also you simply just not wanting a relationship. Again, nothing about attraction, just someone who did not care about sex nor relationships. A "forever single", if you will.

This was already annoying me a lot back then because I was really annoyed by sex "running the world". I was so angry because why is asexual the only sexuality that doesn't like sex? All the other sexualities had the assumption of them always wanting to have sex. Like, even think about someone who is straight, you hear that someone is straight, and you automatically assume(d) that oh they're into sex too cos why wouldn't they be. This was really driving me nuts because I was sure there are people who want to have a partner, but never want to have sex! I was still experiencing crushes, and I knew for sure it was nothing sexual, so it annoyed me that just because I'm asexual, it means I can't have crushes. That's why I actually called myself as "asexual bi" for a while, because "bisexual" indicated I would have not been sex-repulsed and I wanted to point out that I'm NOT into sexual things, at all - and remember that this was still the late 2000s or early 2010s and I had not heard of romantic orientations yet! So I was up to something, there just were no terms for that yet! Today that would be called bi-/panromantic asexual.

I haven't been able to track the exact date or even year when did I figure out I'm aromantic, or when did I hear about romantic orientations for the first time. From the messages I've been able to find, I was already in my early 20s. Aka somewhere around maybe 2011-2013. In those, I have still been wondering what I am or if I even want to have a relationship, not being really able to tell what I wanted or didn't want. Again, no one told me romantic orientations are about ATTRACTION and not about whether you have commitment issues or not (this as a half-joke, cos I have severe commitment issues with everything :D I need to feel free!).

Anyway, I do remember my key moment with aromanticism, or the "aromantic awakening" as you could call it too, was when I was 17 or 18. Or maybe I was older? I don't know, I have time blindness. Anyway, I had this one online friend I had a "crush" on (I think it was just undiagnosed adhd's person hyperfixation) and I even told her about it. Everything just is super shady, from those years, I was not really on my best and there are so many overlapping memories that feel like different alternative universes instead of memories on a same timeline. Anyway, I just remember at some point thinking about this girl and I thought about some "romantic" stuff, like kissing, and I just remember my brain going "NOOOOOPE!" I had wanted to meet with her some day so bad, but when I started thinking about actually meeting with her, I started to nope the fuck out. All I had in my head was awkward embarrassing "first kiss" scenarios from movies and I just was not having it! I basically went "lol I guess I'm aro too, then XD" but I still don't remember when did I have this realization. Was I 17? Or was I, say, 22? I guess I need to go through my old MSN Messenger and Skype convos some day to investigate this further because I really want to know. I couldn't even find anything from my Tumblr from those times (I registered here in 2011), but I don't know if that's just me not tagging or Tumblr search functioning normally (aka it never finds anything).

But yeah, I am touch-repulsed. And kiss-repulsed, and romance-repulsed, too, (unless it's my OTP we're talking about). I'm still not exactly sure if I'm touch repulsed because I'm aromantic, or if I'm aromantic because I'm touch-repulsed. I only know that because of my sensory issues (I'm neurodivergent), I have never liked touching nor being touched. Even as a little kid I hated hugs and never liked sitting on anyone's lap. I only tolerated my parents, mainly my mom, because they were my safe place as an extremely shy baby/toddler/kid, who was especially wary about men. I can't explain the latter, but there was something about adult men that caused me (as a baby) to hide my face against my mom's shoulder if they talked to me. I did that to everyone I didn't know, but especially to men I didn't know. No idea why.

I also remember how my siblings loved to sit on people's laps and were always climbing onto their laps, and I didn't like this. And once my (late) grandma was so touched when she asked me if I want to sit on her lap (I was maybe 5-7?) and I agreed just to make her happy. I still remember how it felt, and I did not like it at all, but it still made my grandma so happy that I THINK she almost cried when she told my mom I actually agreed to sit on her lap. I'm not sure how real this last part of the memory is because I was so young. But I do remember thinking I do that for a change because I knew my grandma would be happy.

So yeah, my touch-repulsion is not exactly a new thing but just something that has been a part of my personality forever. But is that the core reason for why I only feel aesthetic attraction? I never look at people and feel like I wanna touch. More of the opposite, the idea of having to touch them or them touching me makes me go "eeewww". If you have seen that video of a gibbon shaking their whole body after seeing a rat in their exhibit? That's what I feel like when I think about touching or being touched, in just any way, also platonically.

The only time I feel "sensual attraction" is when I see photos or videos of animals. The urge to pet a tiger is insane. But the feel of another human's skin or muscle (or hair or whatever) is very repulsive to me.

I still remember how disgusting it felt to e.g. sit on a cousin's lap. We sometimes used swings like this, and somehow I was aware of it not feeling nice, but still not doing anything about it cos it also was okay? Only later I have realized I really, really loathe the texture of human skin. Or the warmth and overall feeling of a human body. For example, I was at least 7 or younger when I sat on my cousin's lap while we were sitting on a swing and STILL, after over 20 years, I have that all in my body memory. I remember how the thigh bone felt under my legs and how freaking disgusting the muscles felt inbetween. Also at school, on the 1st grade, we often had to walk in a line of twos after the teacher and hold the pair's hand so no one gets lost. My then-friend had so ridiculously dry skin that the only thing I could think of was how I felt like throwing up because the skin on her palm felt so damn disgusting. I still can feel that in my hand when I think of it. That's one of my "core memories" from 1st grade - how disgusting the human skin can feel like.

I don't think I have ever felt actual romantic attraction towards anyone. It's really difficult to differentiate because as I mentioned, I get those people hyperfixations easily. I guess it's the same hormones but I never really want to do anything with them? I guess it's the emotional intimacy that "attracts" me and what gets me excited, but I'm still not exactly sure what emotional intimacy means to me. I don't exactly fall into the QPR category either, in a way I wish I had a best friend whose best friend also I would be, and that neither would have anyone else who is "better" than the other one. But the only intimacy there would be emotional intimacy, nothing else. And I need my freedom so I wouldn't move in with any human being, either.

Sometimes I've thought my "ideal partner" would be a robot because if I get annoyed, I could just turn it off and stuff into a closet and leave there, and if I felt like not having a "relationship" anymore, I could just remove the harddrive and destroy the robot, or both. That way I would be the only one with the memories, and I wouldn't have to worry about someone out there knowing things about me, things that only the closest can know, and I'm really afraid of letting anyone close in case it won't work (also with regular friendships) because I can't stop thinking about how much I wish I had that MIB memory cancelling device so that they would again know almost nothing, or at least much much less about me. There's already one friendship that ended a few years ago and I still keep thinking about how I wish I could take everything back and how I wish they delete(d) all the files and drawings and stuff I sent them. There are so many things about me I wish I never told them, now as we are no longer friends. Back then it felt like "of course this is gonna last a lifetime!" but turns out that nope, not all friendships will.

I guess it's time to stop rambling. This post is really long already. If you read it all the way here: congrats. And thanks. You probably just wasted your time but... that's on you I guess :DDD But yeah, some thoughts from a 30-years-old aroace who has been aware of their identity for at least or almost 10 years now.

[cranehusbands]

for a charming guy, you suck at date nights

mirage | elliott witt/octane | octavio silva; established relationship; fluff; movie nights; adhd headcanons; 1388 words

a/n: 3 FOR 3! these just keep getting posted later and later, im so sorry about that, but i was trying out crossplay on apex today (!!!) and having a blast, i forgot how much fun this game can be with friends, hehe

anyways, day 3 for @apex-rarepairweek, movie night! featuring my very specific octane hcs about his hyperfixations where i am (we irritating) we Projecting. thank you again for these prompts guys, these were super fun!

likes < reblogs, any comments in the tags are appreciated

ao3 mirror in the reblogs!

Preview: “Uh, knock knock, comin’ through.” Octavio looked up, only just realising how badly he was chewing at his fingers as he saw Elliott struggling into the room, two drinks in hand and a bowl under his arm. “Oh, shit- sorry, didn’t hear you askin’ for help.” “You’re fine, babe, but thanks.” He gave a small smile of relief as the runner took the bowl from him, only for that to turn into a light scowl as he watched him scoop a handful of popcorn into his mouth. “C’mon, at least save it.” “S’good.” “Too hot?” Octavio didn’t reply, only slightly winced and turned away to put the bowl on the coffee table, and that was enough for the trickster to soften again, joining him on the loveseat (fitting, for a date night) as he slid the soda over to Octavio’s side, and kept the coffee for himself.

“You can sit down, you know that, right?”

The voice from the kitchen made Octavio look up from his shoes, kicking at the linoleum of the apartment’s entrance. He’d been standing there since Elliott had let him in a few minutes before, before he’d left to go make them drinks. “Uh, sí, just… waiting for you.”

“You, the Octane? Waiting? Thought hell’d freeze over before that happened.”

Though the legend scowled momentarily, hearing his boyfriend chuckle to himself from a distance was enough for him to relax the shoulders he didn’t know he was tensing, pulling his hands out of the pockets of his jacket to wring his hands. So he was a little nervous, sure. And he wasn’t coping well with it, yeah. But it was Elliott - just Elliott, not charming funny guy Mirage - and him here… though even that seemed like it was going to be a little too much.

 Like a lost and bewildered dog, he wandered into the living room, putting his bag down by the side of the sofa tossing his leather jacket across the back of it, fiddling with his gloves as he looked around. He’d been in this front room many times before, especially since they’d gotten together, though more often than not it had just been a segway to go out on a date, or further into the apartment, either option leading to a great time… but not tonight. Elliott wanted to stay in, do something cute (‘like normal couples do’ he’d said, as if they were anything close to normal), and had suggested watching a movie together. “You have a lot of those.” he’d chipped in, but he didn’t even know the half of it. 

 For a long time, Octavio had wasted his money on any old earth horror movie he could find. He had enough of it, seeing how as soon as he burned a hole in his pocket he earned back almost twice as much, but it made him happy - almost as happy as risking his life. He was sure Ajay was happy with the alternative, though impulsive spending was hardly an improvement. But for Octavio, the rush of happiness that came with another order or just watching the same movie over and over again was what he always needed, a tie over until the game the next day, or the stunt live on stream in the afternoon. 

 Maybe that’s why he was so wound up - he was baring his heart out here, and that wasn’t something he liked to do. He was the kind of guy to keep his cards close to his chest, and locked behind threads of chains, and the persona of a man who didn’t care what people thought of him, but still had no interests outside of what he did. And though, yes, the adrenaline rush and the cheer of the crowds was enough for him… movies like these kept him company on lonely nights with a nanny he didn’t care for, when his father had his nose too deep in work or another set of divorce papers.

 “Uh, knock knock, comin’ through.”

Octavio looked up, only just realising how badly he was chewing at his fingers as he saw Elliott struggling into the room, two drinks in hand and a bowl under his arm. “Oh, shit- sorry, didn’t hear you askin’ for help.”

“You’re fine, babe, but thanks.” He gave a small smile of relief as the runner took the bowl from him, only for that to turn into a light scowl as he watched him scoop a handful of popcorn into his mouth. “C’mon, at least save it.”

“S’good.”

“Too hot?”

Octavio didn’t reply, only slightly winced and turned away to put the bowl on the coffee table, and that was enough for the trickster to soften again, joining him on the loveseat (fitting, for a date night) as he slid the soda over to Octavio’s side, and kept the coffee for himself.

“So, you wanted to be in charge of picking, right?”

“Uh, heh… yeah.” He twiddled his thumbs a little, before reaching over the side of the arm to grab his backpack, self-branded and decorated with merchandise of himself and his fellow legends, zipping it open and showing the contents, almost entirely packed with old DVDs.

“Oh, uh… woah.”

“I… couldn’t decide.”

“Yeah, clearly.” Elliott chuckled a little, looking up at Octavio’s slight frown, which really didn’t sit right on his face. “N-not that that’s bad, it’s just very… fitting, for you. Well, let’s see ‘em and then come to a decm- decrom- ...we can pick together.”

 He did as he was told, slowly giving a basic synopsis of each movie he found, recalling odd details and memories he associated with each one, almost forgetting that when it came to these things, he always revealed his full hand and heart in his excitement.

“Oh, this one is a three-parter, kinda like Saw in that it got criticised a lot for being ‘torture porn’ - it’s not… actually porn, it’s just a term for movies with a lot of graphic violence - b-but the endorsement of the first one from this director dude really carried it to cult status with some people. Oh, this one’s a Wes Craven classic- he did, uh-”

“Uhhhh, Elm Street, and Scream, yeah?”

“Sí, sí! This one kinda flopped, though. I still think it’s neat. Little boring sometimes.” He shuffled in his seat a little, carrying on digging through his bag. “Ah, this is a good one! Aliens in the school faculty tryin’ to kill everyone. Oh, oh, and this one’s got alien’s too, but it’s like… British, so there’s that - think it was important back then, ‘cos of stereotypes and- ah, shit, I brought Saw 6 but not Saw 7, I didn’t bring ‘em all ‘cos the first one is boring-”

“Tav, Tav, relax, buddy. Catch a breath.” Elliott laughed, watching Octavio’s expression shift to one of embarrassment as he deflated a little, movies still in his hands, leg bouncing.

“...Sorry, mi amor, you probably don’t-”

“Hey, of course I care. C’mere.” He wrapped his arms around the runner before he could finish, leaning in to pepper his cheek with kisses, making the man giggle a little, though still somewhat sheepish from his unhinged ramblings. “You’re so cute when you get excited, you know that, right?”

“You remind me every day, amigo.”

“I better. Just look at you.” Giving Octavio a playful cheek pinch, Elliott only laughed when the gesture was returned in kind by a soft shove. “Listen, we have all the time in the world. Just you and me tonight, remember? Pick your favourite, and let’s go from there, for as long as we can go. Sound good?”

Octavio slowly nodded, leaning into his boyfriend’s touch, the tension in his body relaxing a little at the comfort, sifting through the rest of the DVDs that he could barely fit into his backpack before he pulled one out from the back, a small grin on his face, showing the pumpkin on the cover to Elliott. “This one?”

“Gotta love the classics. You know where the player is.”

He practically shot off the sofa, almost dragging Elliott with him with the force as he launched himself towards the TV cabinet, pulling open the glass door where the old DVD player sat and prying open the case, barely able to contain himself as he put the disc inside and watched the machine eat it up. He’d seen this movie thousands of times before, he practically knew it by heart at this point, and his impression of the final girl was top-notch, but somehow, he knew watching it with Elliott would be so much better.

 Octavio crawled his way back onto the trickster’s arms, resting himself against his chest with his knees curled up, brought closer by an arm around his shoulder. He felt a gentle kiss on the top of his head and grinned to himself, focused on the moving image on the screen, any worries he had before seeming to drain away. Elliott has that effect, it seemed - enough that in the fourth movie in, they fell asleep in each other’s arms, even the sounds of snuff film murder and screams down the phone not enough to wake them from a lover’s embrace.

[gild-and-fire]

ggweek 2020: All About Rio

Tagged by the wonderful @inyoursheets and absurd @sothischickshe

Tagging (but no pressure!!) @fairhairedkings​ @missmaxime​ @briosgina​ @mrslackles​ 

Questions from here and I think I added a read more?

Why do I personally like or dislike Rio? (I added this one for fun)

A few different elements of Good Girls drew me in (humor, acting, UST, etc) and I have been hyperfixated hooked since! And not to get too real on the main--jk imma bare it all out here on the internet--I found Good Girls in a time when I didn’t really have much independence or agency in my life. So, obviously, beth being a boss bitch and rio being straight-up unhinged definitely satiated me.

Specifically, other than the fact that he is very very handsome and i would give him my life savings if he just said the word “muhney”, I love that he takes calculated risks (ie any risk he takes on beth), has fun being a prick (“what’s up, you miss me?”, “it’s too good, ma”, “need another bathroom break?”, “we’re consolidating”), has amazing outfits (no further comment), uses his charisma to cajole and charm people into compliance (rip Gil & Lucy), and yeah i just think he’s neat

What are your headcanons about Rio’s and Mick’s relationship? Did they meet through crime? Are they lifelong friends?

OH definitely best buds for LIFE who met during crime and then like just trusted each other’s judgement. I think Demon follows orders without a second thought (which Rio loves), Rio laughs manically whenever Demon says something sassy or rude (which Demon loves), and they neither one takes life too seriously, ya know? They’re both just having a good time and appreciate that the other is on the same wavelength.

Now that’s what is probable. What isn’t probable BUT I want dearly??

Mick barbeques every other month and Rio brings Marcus everytime

Rio and Mick have matching tattoos on their ankles from a very fun night in Canada

They play basketball together and the winner rubs the victory in the other’s face for the rest of the week. Rio always dunks on Mick, but Mick is surprisingly agile and good at stealing (bc he’s not wearing a tiny leather jacket duh)

Mick has tried to set Rio up with his many cousins by bringing them to the bar “coincidentally” at the same time Rio is there

They text each other pictures of their food and share restaurant/food truck suggestions

What are Rio’s hobbies outside of work and Marcus? What do you think he’d get up to on a day with absolutely no responsibilities?

ART! ART! ART! I will not accept any answers except for boxing/basketball and art. That man’s apartment was wayyy to gorgeous, and have you seen his hands?? I can only imagine the things he can do with a paintbrush

What do you think Rio’s goals for the future are?

Total mayhem and destruction (at the Boland residence)

What do you think Rio is bad at (cooking, dancing, singing, etc.)? How come?

There’s NO way he’s good at singing, but i would bet everything i have that he is a good dancer. I mean,, I could stare at the way he walks allllll day.

Why do you think Rio is drawn to Beth? + Why do you think Rio didn’t kill Beth?

Before I joined the fandom, I really questioned why either one was attracted to the other, and oftentimes, I was convinced that they simply were using each other for selfish reasons and for the sake of manipulating the other. Now, I still believe that they use each for selfish business reasons, but that genuine feelings and interests have also developed since around 1.06 and it has been challenging for both ever since business and personal have mixed.

I think the fact that they are two sides of the same coin makes their attraction so delicious for a viewer, but I think that they are both distrustful individuals and thus are destined to always second guess the other’s motivation even if they are being genuine. It kinda reminds me of Epifanio and Camila’s marriage in Queen of the South: they love each other, but the clash of their individual ambitions make it difficult to trust each other.

But, back to the question lol. I think Rio is drawn to Beth and hasn’t killed her because he understands her, sees himself in her, and enjoys how she challenges him. Specifically, they are both motivated by the desire to provide for their kid(s) and their love for crime. Beth hustles hard, leverages her unfortunate situations into advantageous ones, and only trusts herself--I think the same can be said for Rio and that he admires these parts of Beth.

What are your headcanons about Rio’s family? Siblings? Parents? Lifestyle growing up?

This is a tough one bc I absolutely love the different OCs created for Rio’s family and I think it’s so fun to see his older sisters clown him on the daily. However, I’m inclined to think he has one older sister because he drinks his respect women juice and has STRONG younger sibling vibes (re: constantly causing trouble but always acquitted). In my limited experience, I think older siblings have to be more responsible, and Rio plays it a little more fast and loose.

I would also venture a guess that if he had a “stable”/”traditional” childhood, he likely wouldn’t have fallen into crime? I have a hard time placing what his parents and upbringing was like, because I only have my frame of reference and like who thinks that’s sound judgement lol. But I suppose that Manny’s own backstory would be a good starting point: he grew up in a rough area, has traditional grandparents (who likely supervised Rio when his parents were working/not home), and is hustling to move up in the world. I also think that he is someone who has come to discover and define his own style over time, but wasn’t able to when he was younger.

Do you think Rio’s been arrested before Beth got him arrested in 1.10? When, and what for?

MY bby? My “too smart for his own good”, “two-steps-ahead” bby??? ABSOLUTEL Y  NOT  i think the shutdown episode is such a good example of why not, and i think we know that beth is a BIG, glaring exception in his normal business dealings, so getting arrested doesn’t happen often, if ever

If Rio weren’t a crime boss, what jobs do you think he’d be good at? Why?

OK so I went back and forth on this one. Let me explain my thoughts

I think he is well-suited for being a PM in tech because it requires “disruption” and Rio definitely loves to disrupt things lol, and he is a natural leader who can motivate a team to follow his lead.

I DO not think that working at a consulting firm or law firm or something businessy like that would be up his alley bc its way too stuffy and too many rules (ethics & compliance training, what the fuck?) But Rio is also good at being a snake

Maybe a math teacher? Before you laugh, hear me out. He’s good with kids, he’s good at math, and we know he likes to give lessons!! (does he do it well? Idk but obviously beth was ready to shoot boomer in S2 and then taught Max in s3, so there’s that lol)

But yeah, I think an entrepreneur in tech is perf bc is requires a certain degree of rule-breaking, a certain degree of charisma, and strong math/science skills.

[q-u-a-c-k]

rant that you can just skip over 😂 it's just detailed intrusive thoughts. and I'm continuing to rant about literally everything that goes through my brain so I am here writing this and not acting on thoughts or being stupid.

okay so this is a note from after I have written all that. and basically it's complaining and ranting about everything and hyperfixating on space and science in the end. in the middle I talk about my fears of love 😂 potentially triggering stuff? it's all nonsense you really dont have to read it. it was just to keep myself from doing something I shouldn't. so if you could be triggered by literally anything maybe dont? idk. I cant stop you but it's probably annoying and not interesting. if anyone does read it though let me know if I need to tag it anything.

So my brain has now decided that because there is no way I am sleeping tonight unless it's exhaustion, I get intrusive thoughts. fun! so rn it has been fixated on the fact that because I am closest to the outside. not hall door. that I could easily sneak out. which is very much not good idea, because 1) I dont live in this area, 2) it's still cold as fuck outside at night, 3) I would literally fucking get lost or caught immediately. So yeah :) I dont even know what I would do if I did go and I don't want to because I have an idea of what brain would say and that's a big no. it's especially big no because I'm too comfortable with the idea of it but I'm not allowed to. and I guess now it's kinda good because brain is thinking about how I miss my cat. I just wanna see my baby and be in my safe place with the people I'm actually comfortable with (cat and phone with online friends) like guys he's so fuckung adorable and what if he doesnt know why I'm not there right now. usually he sleeps in my room at night. so what if he's in my room waiting for me and I cant go see him. you're damn right that I'm crying about this. i just want my baby because he is my baby and an indicator of a safe place.

also I am so incredibly fucking uncomfortable. like I cannot sleep because 1) in a place I do not know 2) there are people (family) in the room that I am not comfortable letting my guard down around 3) there's so much noise from snoring (and from one sleep talking) 4) I am on the couch because when we go places I'm always the one who has to and it's a shitty pull out bed couch. it makes way too much noise that I have been in an uncomfortable position for over 3 hours because I dint want to disturb anyone else. and I can very easily feel like of the metal bars under the middle of my back 5) I am very cold. I forgot a blanket and I didnt get one because the room only gave us one extra one (I dont think we're supposed to have an extra person) ad my sister got it even though I'm the one by the outsid,door, window, and air conditioner which wont turn off. I at least have my flannel though to cover my legs 6) my head hurts so bad because it's the kind of headache that hurts to have eyes open, breath, or move around in general 7) my stomach hurts so bad because I had to eat because apparently people get hungry and are supposed to eat along with anxiety from literally all of this 8) I have not gotten to be alone for more than 10 minutes since the middle of Wednesday whereas usually I spend almsot all of my time alone (with cat and phone with online friends) in my safe place. 9) I have not stopped crying (not really like crying crying but like there has been tears or water from my eyes because for some reason they burn and some because of anxiety or missing cat. 10) I keep thinking that at any moment I close my eyes someone is going to break into the room or one of my family members are gonna do something (I literally dont know what, that's intrusive thoughts talking but I have previously freaked out because I thought they were gonna aliven't me for no reason) 11) When I'm somewhere I'm not used to I get really bad muscle cramps in my arms and legs and I am not having fun with that.

sorry that was a shit ton of complaining that nobody should have read or give a shit about. so sorry if anyone actually read that?

also Allison, if you actually do read this (istg you really dont have to. like I said this is just my train of thoughts written to prevent me from doing anything. I am not watching wandavision until later today 😂 and I am staying off the discord server I joined becuas of potential spoilers.

anyways continuation of rants and complaints. I really want to put the phone down and attempt to sleep even though I know I'm not gonna be able to and for that reason I have to write here because I do not trust myself with my brain being like this rn. but I wanna put phone down so bad because my eyes hurt and my head hurts from having eyes open.

and I really wanna just get my earbuds out and have controlled noise and potentially fall asleep but that would take noise louder than them to drown them out but any noise already is hurting my head and earbuds sound really uncomfortable right now.

also I'm starting to get really cold again because the flannel was working for a little but I think that was because I had to move a little bit to get it out and on my legs and I haven't been moving.

also my sister (sleep.talker) has been just making noises and mumbling all night except just now she went "eww" and rolled over and continued snoring and sleeping. so that's fun. totally didnt scare me.

oh my God it's fuckung almost 3:30 I just wanna sleep. at this rate I dont care in what way it happens, but I want sleep in the next 10 minutes so I cannot be aware of how uncomfortable or in pain I am.

my back (which usually already has back pain) connot stand to lay on the bar in this position anymore so I have to move but it's so loud and I dont wanna wake anyone up or move into a worse position but feel bad for moving.

I have now moved and I dont THINK I woken anyone up. back is better but head hurts so much more now because of movement and I am now laying on my knee which I have a lot of problems with and am not having a fun time.

idk what to talk about. I want sleep or to at least put phone down but like I said multiple times I do not trust my brain rn so I have to keep writing stuff. and I dont want to just keep complaining but idk what to talk about and complaining is easiest rn because I was out in an uncomfortable situation by coming with them and I didnt want to in the first place but would not be able to stay home.

I am now gonna talk about sleep and my thoughts about it. I like being asleep but I also dont. I like being not awake but most of the time do not like the dreams I have. but sleep itself is such an interesting concept. like the body forces itself to shut down and put you unconscious to like rest itself or repair before continuing to function. and it's like (supposed to be) on a specific or close to schedule. like youre supoosed to have a schedule for when you're unconscious. and this is completely normal. a part of our society is actually shaped around this too? like at certain times around the world it gets all dark and the world goes quiet for a while. idk I just think it's really interesting. maybe it's not idk lmao.

and now brain wants to talk about how and why I am afraid to love. :). brain is afraid to love because that means I have to be vulnerable to someone and that's just so terrifying to do, especially being someone who is different than a lot of the heteronormative society. like I absolutely love my friends. and once I'm comfortable around them, I'm gonna tell them that I love them as much as I can (but also dont want to make them uncomfortable). because if I finally feel comfortable enough around you to be vulnerable and accept that I love you despite brain's overwhelming urge to say I don't and be invulnerable and safe, I'm gonna tell you that as much as I can that I love you. because it literally happens so little in my life that I actually really trust someone. so if I tell you I love you I mean it (and it tells you I trust you). like seriously, I barely even say it to my mom because I'm so on guard and trying to watch my back around her. and I dont think I say it to the rest of my family. unless it's my grandparents I'm gonna tell them that because I think I do just in a different way of your my grandparent and you're family. and I occasionally say it to my irl best friend because there's still a lot I'm on guard about because I haven't told her a lot of things so we're not as close as you'd think. but if you're reading this I have probably told you i love you. and i know Allison i tell you as much as i can because I think yyou'rethe absolute top person that I trust and love, so i try to tell you a lot. because I love you!! you're like my entire found family 😂

but now we're gonna talk about reasons why I'm terrified to be in love romantically. Because I dont think i have actually liked someone romantically or really ever be romantically interested in anyone. I have thought about it because I felt like I had to tell myself I was ( I was not). like i thought I had a crush on someone once but I think it was because I was unable to be their friend at the time that I wanted to be their friend even more. and because I never really got to pick my friends I didnt know what it was like to actually want to be friends with someone. but thinking about someone romantically I just cant really do. because I don't want to get into a romantic relationship if I don't know if I'm gonna like them romantically at all. do people like people romantically when they first go out with someone? or do they just say I kinda like this person let's try it out? because that just doesnt make sense to me and idk. and it could very well be that I'm just to young to know yet. because I still dont even know what I would want from a romantic relationship. like... Idk what there is for me to want or what's different to loving your friends besides calling them something else? and the whole having to trust that this person likes you in a specific way that you might like them before you take it far enough and get hurt because they just don't feel the same? or you're the one that's not really sure and potentially hurt someone else? I know people say it's just a risk you're gonna have to take but I dont want to take a risk like that. I dont mind being hurt from it myself but in terrified at the thought that I could potentially hurt someone because I just dint feel a certain way. and I still dont know what the difference is between friend love or romantic love to be able to judge or risk that? like seriously what is different? because I mean, maybe affection like have someone to hug or cuddle? but you could do that with friends and it should be a normal thing to have with your friends. but ig this still is a fucked up society that thinks everything has to be more than what it really is. and it just leaves people touch starved because of it. idk. maybe one day I'll figure it out, but how it's just Greek and foreign to me. idfk.

well that was fun. now it's 4 and I need something else to talk about because even if I do potentially fall alseep soon, I do not want those to be my last thoughts and possibly have dream about it (dreams for me are typically not good).

I think I see the moon. it's either a moon or a parking lot light. and I know the moon is either full or very close to full (I'm pretty sure it's just very. close) but I wish all of those lights outside were off and possibly have a new moon so I could see the stars. I love the stars so much. i love the moon, too, but right now it's very bright. but I wish I was more into astronomy and knew more about it. because that's also something that's very interesting to me is space and the stars. I wanna be someone who knows about all of the constellations. but I have a horrible memory and absolutely would not be able to remember 88 different stories. although I'd want to. even though most of them or a bunch are just Zeus being a dick. but more to the science side of the stars is so interesting to me that they're soooooo far away. like they're literally incomprehensibly far away. like I cannot comprehend how big a football field is without see one, I'm agine being able to comprehend the distance of light years? like I know we know how far it is but I'm pretty sure human minds cannot comprehend how far that ACTUALLY is. even if we know it's a LOT. and isnt it cool how we're able to know there are other planets outside of the solar system? I believe it's 4 different planets that we know of that are MORE inhabitable than earth. like better to live on. and they have either older or stronger stars that wouldn't die out as fast as our sun. although there comes the debate of if we should be able to go to them. it's a very debatable question, but I think overall the answer would be no. because humans have fucked up an entire planet, why should we be allowed to do it to another? like it realize it's literally a percent of humans that fucked it up for the rest of the planet, but humans have an inner need to have power over everyone else and other things and would stop at nothing to get what they want. humans could so easily become corrupt and destroy other planets too. it's kind of a fucked up thing to say, but I feel like maybe humans should die out with our planet. like of course it's not fair to the ones who haven't had the chance to live a life yet. but it was never fair to the other creatures humans killed for their own needs. like we have caused extinction several times. karma will get you back in the end ig. and it would be cool to know but obviously we wouldnt be able to know, if a species even smarter than humans evolved and kept the peace on earth, even as the ruling species? ruling sounds wrong but idk what else to call it. whatever we are above everything else is what they would be. but it would be so amazing to know what smarter beings are alive or could eventually live. like that's so fucking cool.

anyways I should probably try to sleep or put phone down because now brian doesnt have time to let me do anything I shouldnt. it's 4:30 😂 someone is probably gonna wake up soon because idk.

[wigglingpandaboi]

Ooh, for that OC ask thing, 4 7 11 and 28 if that’s okay 😁

Lol sorry I just looked through your oc’s and I would die for all of them

*cries* thank you so much that's so valid i love you. Ahhhahahjdkdhwkwnwn 😭😭😭😭😭😭

4. Which OC are you least/Most like? Did this come as a surprise to you

Askdjfkdjdks considering my OC's are just based on some of my actual traits but personified yeah im like quite a few of them

Probably the main Trio is who im the most like, but Max def takes the cake. All of my characters are dumbass's but she's the mega dumbass of them all (She literally swallowed a pocket knife once so she could *store it for later* then it opened in her throat and gave everyone a stroke)

Im least like probably Alistar. I love my sweet Dad man, but he's way too smart for me. Though he too is also a dumbass at times, there's a reason why he has so many burn scars on his hands

7. Which OC wasn't supposed to exist but captured your heart immeidently

Omg literally all my Guardian God characters.

Originally the only one's who had a character in the RP were the trio's parents, Hadeus, Zeusira and Siden.

But then me and my friend decided to do something and i had to make all the rest of my 13 Guardians and at first I didn't put much thought onto them but then I feel in love and now they play a major part in the story!! I loved them so much I actually planned a full redemption arc for Sira. (He's kind of a bad Dad to Ellis, not horrible, but bad. He's kind of awkward)

11. What kind of tropes do you find yourself writing more often than others

FOUND FAMILY

Bruh found family is literally almost all I write for. I have like...a couple of characters in romantic relationships but only two of them are Important to the story (Crones and Rheana, the Guardian Gods creators/parents and the only two romantic people i will ever stan. Their still both ace and nb tho)

I also write a lot for just the normal family trope, the stupid bunch of siblings, soft Dad characters

There's also the *creature with no gender or sex trope* and that's literally all my characters. Yes their all nb, yes their all ace.

Im also obsessed with humanoid characters with sharp teeth, pointy ears and claws. And you bet I make it sure they all able to purr

Also big animals. Big puppies and Cats. That's all.

Oh and characters that are serious and edgy also being big soft cuddle bugs. I like making all my characters touched starved and make sure to give them cuddles

Also people who aren't dumb but are dumbasses. They know what their doing, they know the consequences, but they will do it anyway. Even better if their just extremely feral.

28. Say your MC's had a very specific hyperfixations that didn't serve the plot it was just something they nerd out on in their own time, what would it be?

OH OH yes i love this

Okay im just gonna do the trip cuz they are kinda the main main characters for everything

Max: She's def hyperfixiated on armor and knives, also she's got a weird obsession with human anatomy. (She's not human and has no organs or anything) she's fascinated with human organs and stuff and how they can all fit in their. She always ends up poking and prodding at the ninjas all the time cause they are *squishy*

Thomas: Seashells. Anything to do wirh seashells. He loves them as has a whole chest full of them (totally has nothing to do with the fact his Dad's the Guardian of the sea no not at all) Also he loooves colored pencils. He likes watching videos of people making them and want's to learn how to make his own one day

Ellis: BIRDS omg he loves birds. He has a whole book that's just about the different types of birds. Also crochet. He loves crochet and yarn. He loves the texture of yarn and it's a massive touch stim for him.

Ahhhhhhh that's it

Thank you so much for asking about my oc's it means to much to me :').

Im always opened for asks or questions about my babies so feel free. This inspired me to post more art so thank you 💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙

[vuure]

Embrace your past and get to know your friends’ fandom origins!

Rules: Post gifs of your fandoms / ships starting with your most current hyperfixation and work backwards. (Bonus points if you share any stories about how or when you got into that ship! But not necessary!!) Then tag anyone whose fandom history you’d like to learn about!

 @ilackallhonour​ has tagged me in this, and usually I’m really bad at actually joining in, but this one really got me thinking back on all my old fandoms and hyperfixations. I didn’t really do shipping until a few years ago, might have something to do with my recently discovered ace-ness :’)

I always had fantasies that I was part of the world of that particular hyperfixation at time. Of course very heroic and awesome, and very close to my favorite character. Alas, real life is disappointing in that regard.

Merlin/Arthur, I never watched the show when it first came out. Mostly because I can be a bit stubborn and when a lot of people keep telling me that I should totally watch something because I will love it, I refuse to watch it. Don’t know why I’m like that. Turned out, I totally did love it, and binged it like crazy. Also shipped Arthur/Merlin like crazy. Was really disappointed in the ending, and thus, turned to fic. For me, when I’m really obsessed with a show or book I just cannot let go and will read fic until eventually my fixation dies out.

The Umbrella Academy, I don’t really ship anyone, except maybe bromances, and their sibling relationships (Five and Vanya <3 Klaus and Diego <3<3). Man, I love this show, I binged it when it first came out, immediately watched again, got other people to watch it, and watched it again so I could talk to them about it some more. Of course turned to fic, but got a bit eww-ed out, because there was a lot of shipping going on and I didn’t dig it (too each their own, though).

Black Sails, uuuugh I can’t with this show. @Ilackallhonour actually got me curious about it because all the stuff she posted and reblogged. And damn, was it a life changer. I’ve always had a bit of a weird obsession with ships and that time period, but more from Dutch, and VOC perspective. Still, the setting immediately hooked me in, but I really stayed for the story, the characters…Silver. Oh damn. And Silver/Flint, oh double damn.

Sterek. Really, I can’t even say I liked Teen Wolf that much, although I did enjoy the first few seasons. But I stayed for every glimpse of Sterek I could catch. The first time Derek shoved Stiles into the wall I was screaming at my TV, NO WAY there are no people shipping that. Dude, that’s so canon it hurts! But well, the show turned into a big dumpster fire, and I found the online fandom. Got an AO3 account just so I could bookmark and comment and give out kudos so my favorite Sterek fic. And there are tons of fics. I can admit it, I was an addict. I can’t go on AO3 without drowning back in fandom hell, so I keep off it. Really, it was a problem. I was reading fic ALLLL the time. When I should’ve been working, sleeping, socializing, etc. Followed so many Sterek blogs on Tumblr, but wanted my sanity back so unfollowed them all. Sorry @andavs​, I still love your blog, and your art, and your fics sooooo much, but it was too big of a problem *sigh*

Harry Potter, of course. My favorite character was Fred, and got very upset when people tried to convince me he was exactly the same as George. NO HE ISN’T! He’s the idea guy!! Lol. It’s been a while since I’ve read the books, and not sure how much of that is true anymore. Back then I didn’t really do shipping, but now I’m a Drarry shipper, haha. The fics are just so goooood.

Gilmore Girls, duuuude. This show shaped my life. Every time I’m one a re-watch I’m like…oh thát’s where I got that from! I copied character traits and sense of humor and stuff into my own personality. Didn’t like the new episodes much, but that won’t destroy my love for the Gilmores.

Veronica Mars, same as with Gilmore Girls really. Huge impact on my life. Love the snarkiness, and yeah did have some ships in there. Actually did like the new season (though I hated the movie), but they did LoVe dirty man.

I should put Supernatural in this list too, although I feel like I abandoned the show and am not a true fan. I was obsessed with it for so long though. Those first seasons were so great, I loved the relationship between Dean and Sam (in a platonic, totally brotherly way because I do not like incest-y things) and the normal everyday hunting things part of the show. But than all the demons and angels en Gods came and I got a bit tired of the endless cycle of dying and being brought back to life, evil turned to good turned to evil turned to good thing. I’m of the opinion that shows should have an end. Just like three or four seasons, tops. Just finish it with a good, solid ending. Don’t drag it along until it dies an ugly death.

And now unto some total different things, that shaped my childhood. Hard to find a GIF for these books, but what is fandom without some cool art ^_^

 Tomorrow when the war began, by John Marsden. I was obsessed with these books, and read them over and over again, even now I’m not tired of them and could get lost in them before I finished the first page.

Wheel of Time, Robert Jordan. This series really got me into the fantasy genre back then. I had no idea of any of the fantasy cliché’s, or Arthur legends yet, so I wasn’t tired yet of all the same old tropes. I find it a lot harder now to read them, but back then I saved money to be able to buy them as soon as a new one came out, and re-read the entire series up till that point before I read the new one.

Cats the (broadway) musical. Me and my little sister watched the movie version of this show over and over again, every time focused on a different cat. We knew all the lyrics, we knew all the cats. We knew every little thing there was of them to know. We named our black cat (we ..I demanded a black cat) Misty, for Mistyfollees (she’s a girl you see, so we couldn’t name her Mistofollees). I even wrote some fic for it, haha.

(note: I tried really hard to find another GIF but there’s none) Elfquest, oooh Elfquest. This was my truest and biggest obsession, I think. I created my own elf characters, joined online RPG forums to write stories about our own characters, met up with other fans, dressed like a favorite character. A lot of the friends I have now, I met at those forums. I’m still low-key trying to collect the better-looking English paperbacks of the series, but am in no hurry to finish it, and don’t really read them anymore anyway. And my ship? Skywise/anyone, haha. I love Skywise so damn much. And his and Cutter’s relationship is everything (who’s Leetah? Fuck Leetah).

Tagging @stormnyk​ @andavs​  (I tagged you already anyway, sorry ;p) @imperfectimpostor96​

[simptasia]

hc questions 5, 6, 7, 26, 44 & 47 for any or all of the science team members if you want? :)

oh bless!! thank you!! i’ll go with My Beloved Three, as usual, the sci trio

Cleanliness habits (personal, workspace, etc.)

my hcs on this have wobbled over time but overall i imagine dan, char and miles are all like, fairly, neat. tho they all have a tendency to leave papers around

and miles doesn’t make the bed as much. cuz imagining miles napping in rumpled quilts is a very cute mental image. hair disheveled

i think a good term for whats going on with dan and char is Organized Chaos. they’re both scientists (and a musician) for heck’s sake. it doesn’t look like they know what they’re doing but they do. but ur not gonna walk into their house(s) and be like “ugh gross what the fuck”. it’s nice. dan tends to make the bed

and i imagine dan keeps The Rat Room (yes, you heard me) immaculate because you reeeeeeally want that area to be well cared for

as for personal, lets get this out of the way, none of them are yucky. but dan is showering the least, just due to absent mindedness and hyperfixation. like ya really get into a project and then suddenly oh fuck i need a shower. but thats relative. he’s not a stinky gross boy. i imagine miles washes the most because like, he has body piercings and those GOTTA be cleaned every day, especially the downstairs one. miles values his dick, he don’t want an infection

also its amazing how much more you shower/bathe when you have a partner. or in this case, two partners. in general and for sexy purposes. hell yeah

well thats enough of me picturing these three showering, moving on

Eating habits and sample daily menu

its odd how often i’ve pictured these people eating together

dan: eats the least (and for once that isn’t a skinny joke, he could eat cake every day and he’d still be like that) because for the most part he doesn’t have much of an appetite. he eats what he needs, with random bursts of being really hungry (it’s a neurodivergent thing). i imagine he has a extra fondness for pasta and can put a surprising amount of it away when he wants to. tho typically for ease, he’ll stick to noodles. he takes his coffee mild and decaf. i hc him as a vegetarian due to not being able to process meat. his body also cannot handle alcohol and the one time he tried it he needed to be hospitalized. his ice cream preference is vanilla with chocolate sprinkles. or honeycomb. favourite vegetable is capsicum (which he’d call a bell pepper because he’s american), favourite fruit is pineapple. on that note he likes pineapple pizza. overall he eats simple but isn’t against trying new things. he has a very neutral disposition towards food

char: of the trio, i define charlotte as the Loud Passionate One so obviously being a big eater goes with that, likes a big breakfast (eggs, sausages, sometimes french toast!), sometimes skips lunch when she’s working at the museum due to focus, has a ravenous sweet tooth (i haven’t been subtle that i’ve made her ADORE chocolate but in general i see her liking sweet things), she can handle eating less tho because she’s gone on plenty of expeditions and such. so i think she eats a lot under normal circumstances because, like, she can. i don’t think i need to tell you what her ice cream or starbucks preferences are, do i? takes her coffee with three sugars, two coffees and creamy. likes mochas and hot chocolates too. with marshmallows. naturally, her fave kind of chocolate is galaxy because she is an English Woman. another fave of hers is cadbury’s creme eggs. but lest you think Good Lord Sapphire This Woman’s Entire Body Is A Sugar Molecule, don’t worry she does eat well. like veggies, fruits, meats, she’s fine. of meats, she has a fondness for fish (i have no further information, im terrible with fish. but she’s a pom, so...). favourite fruit is pear, favourite vegetable is peas. likes a bacardi, or rum and coke

miles: he eats a “normal” amount but he’s a grazer. which means, not so much Set Meal eating than eating/snacking thru out the day. he takes his coffee black, no surprise, but with sugar! see, its a metaphor. for him. likes fried eggs and hash browns. his fave food is very cheap mac and cheese. i think in general he really likes cheese. he doesn’t have complicated tastes, like, he grew up poor. he likes seafood (in particular fish tacos) but not lobster as he discovered when he got cashed up. he likes salty food but likes sweets too, in particular i can imagine him snacking on m&ms, skittles, gummi bears. little things. doesn’t have a fave vegetable because he doesn’t care enough, to him veggies are things to eat so you won’t die. doesn’t hate him but isn’t excited to eat ‘em. fave ice cream is mint choc. he’ll drink whatever (except for vodka) but is used to beer. thinks pineapple on pizza is an abomination, espech since he really likes pizza otherwise. i consider him a food opportunist, like, oh theres food here? yoink. or like, oh hey, if everybody else is eating, i’ll have whatever’s going on

....i feel like whenever i write hcs about these guys my brain takes on their tone. like, that was a lot of short, eh whatever, sentences for miles there

Favorite way to waste time and feelings surrounding wasting time

dan:

- reading (really depends on how you define Wasting Time). also he composes music and when he was alive, that was considered wasting time (ugh)

- sometimes even just doing hobbies or work or whatever, even then, he tends to have this feeling of never doing enough due to his Perfectly Healthy And Supportive Upbringing [seethes] so uhhhh basically, anxiety? like this was a dude raised to think anything other than his work was a waste of time. it didn’t exactly work but a decent amount of that Pressure has to still sit with him

char:

- watching tv, espech star trek

- not a waste of time if you’re enjoying yourself

miles:

- card and board games (weren’t expecting that, were ya? i’m not saying that's his Fave Thing To Do, but he considers that a good chill out thing to do. something to do when ur bored but you don’t feel like watching tv or having sex)

- “it’s something to do”

Do they have any plans for the future? Any contingency plans if things don’t workout?

dan:

for original lifetime dan, it was Do Science, Make Mom Proud (tiny voice: and maybe spend the rest of my life with charlotte. if i’m lucky. maybe. please? love?) cuz i imagine dan, although very focussed on the future, actually doesn’t think/care about HIS future. i just don’t think he cares about himself enough

limbo dan is like Make Music, Love Charlotte. which is fair. and then Love Miles on top of that. so yeah, just wants to be a good musician and husband. and one day, father. with char actually in his life in this world, thats def on his mind. he won’t bring it up tho, he’ll wait for her to mention it :3

(dan’s canon contingency plan for things not working out is hydrogen bomb)

char:

alive char, like, ADVENTURE! ISLAND! SOLVE MYSTERIES! that makes it sound like she’s a fucking scooby doo character. i mean, her Goal was to find the island and find out what the fucky duck is going on. she did that. and overall his goals seem like adventure/career orientated. i hc that this version of char never intended on getting married or having kids. she wasn’t Against the ideas and she’s certainly had romances but she was more thinking of other things. (that and i think deep down char thought nobody would ever wanna marry her)

in limboverse There Is No Mystery but she still has her great job(s), that is she works at a museum and i think she goes on expeditions sometimes. so theres that, she’s got the great career. really, her Plan for the future in this world is live the live she couldn’t before. she (and dan!) died young so they’re gonna like, actively adore each other and get married and have kids. and also miles is there. ha, that sounded so rude. she loves miles too. (besties/fuck buddies turned Hey You Wanna Join Me And Dan’s Relationship and miles like... yeah sure)

miles:

step one: get money to fill gaping hole of sadness in chest

step two: ????

step three: die

and even my limbo miles whomst i’ve put with dan and char doesn’t have any plans for the future, besides like, do his job and maybe become a dad again (context: i hc that miles had two kids with richard when he was alive). so he’s still chilling but without the depressing ache of loneliness and bitterness

so basically long story short for all of them (in limboverse): Love & Family

Superstitions or views on the occult?

ohooo i like this one

dan: didn’t grow up believing in magic and such (which is super ironic because his mother is a fucking other) but he has a very open mind. i think he’ll believe it if he’s thrust into the situation. it’s interesting really, dan is known as the science guy and that's great but he’s super fucking accepting of not science shit. tho of course, he’s not seeing the island time travel as magic but science. but more importantly, he regards miles’ powers with zero doubt or questioning. he doesn’t even seem confused, he is absolutely on board with miles being able to talk to dead people. this all implies miles told him off screen and dan believes him

so basically he’ll accept whatever is presented to him as true

which honestly, is what a good scientist is like. the trope of the scientist character who is ultra non believing of the supernatural, even when they’re seeing it before their eyes, is annoying. like, you know the ones? the ones who get angry about it. the overly skeptical scientist. hate that. dan is not that

and his character arc includes embracing free will over destiny so there's that

char: she’s not superstitious and doesn’t believe in magic or the supernatural at all. tho thrown into bizarre situations she’s like ???? but has to accept it. and she KNOWS something is up with the island. she knows its different. i just mean, under normal circumstances she’d regard magic stuff as funny nonsense. i hc that char, in living life, doesn’t believe miles can speak to the dead. really fucking weird this isn’t addressed in the show but hahaaaa they wasted char! anyways and like, if presented with the concept that dan’s brain damage is being healed by the island, she’d look confused, say thats impossible but she’d think on it

what i’m saying is she’ll rule out magic concepts at first, on reflex. but would grow to accept them, especially with stuff she knows/has repressed

she doesn’t believe in ghosts, psychics, visions, magic healing and all those exist in her world, so it’s all a matter of experience

miles: WELL WHADDYA THINK

actually it’s funny. miles has magic powers but he’s 0% superstitious and i imagine outside of his own powers, he really doesn’t believe in the occult. i hc that until he personally proved otherwise, he grew up thinking he was mentally ill. and once he realised it was true, thought he was some kind of freak

and he’s incredulous when he finds out hurley has powers too. tho miles, being miles, does roll with the punches a lot in the show, he’s skeptical when it comes to hurley's power. and i find that interesting. also i fucking love how when hurley describes his power, miles says “thats not how it works”, like ???? babe???

but overall his attitude on the island is like “well. this is happening”

i do think thru his life, despite his power, he doesn’t believe in All Magic or occult or whatever. i also hc that he attracted those kind of people who are REALLY into astrology and auras and stuff like that and he found them exasperating. (i think he’d be a lot more okay with it if it was claire who was talking about astrology and palm reading with him. he’d be endeared when its her)

and i think he thinks other psychics he’s met or seen on tv are straight up bullshit. he can believe he has it but he’s skeptical of other people. just assumes they’re scammers. hell, he was a scammer. who just happened to have the power. he was like “well i have this, i may as well get some use outta it”

oh and in limboverse, they all kinda have to accept their situation. and they take it with ease due to appreciating getting happier lives

How do they express love?

a dan who loves you will pet your face and look at you like ur his entire reason to live. a char who loves you will squeak at your jokes and will never once let you feel bad about yourself. a miles who loves you is sorry he isn’t better at this stuff but he really is trying... sure we can cuddle if you wanna, that’s cool v///v

the dan and char we saw in the show was them holding back and i find that very amusing because they were HEART EYES AS FUCK for each other and so affectionate and so soft hearted, like oh my gosh. canon show dan/char is them when they’re pining... when they’re not even a couple (yet, damn it)

imagine them at full power

i figured it out, dan/char couldn’t be an Official Couple because then jeremy davies and rebecca mader would have destroyed us all, especially me

anyways. they’re both very protective of each other. they... they touch each other a lot. like a lot for people who aren’t dating and whomst don’t think the other one loves them. like char is surprised when dan says he loves her. that fucking astonishes me. HE’S NOT SUBTLE. char are you okay???

dan is more open about the love than char, seeing as he said it. and double downed on it. char i feel was holding back for different reasons than dan. dan was holding back (fucking barely) because of eloise’s Love Will Only Bring Pain upbringing, which’d give somebody a serious complex. so he was adverse to actually pursuing a relationship AND i figure he thought “she wouldn’t wanna be with me anyways”. but char i imagine, a deep seated insecurity and need to be defensive, but also! dan was like REALLY mentally unwell before the island. and that's the dan that char knows (and loves) but she’d feel guilty if she pursued anything with him. like she’s taking advantage of a brain damaged person

ah fuck i went on a big thing about why they didn’t become a couple instead of like.... the question. how do they express love? like they did in the show. smiles, touches, longing gazes, protectiveness. they would die for each other

as for miles, how does he express love? Not Well. at first

whoever is the first person he fell in love with (i imagine richard), he was not good at... being open about that. i don’t think miles is good with love. lived his life pretty detached/bitter about the concept, which i imagine is due to having cynicism about life and death. everybody you love is gonna die, so why bother? (his mom dying hit him pretty hard) so uhhh its gonna be... baby steps

slowly becoming more open about liking somebody, becoming more affectionate, more... uh, couple-y (and later throuple-y). it’d take time and he will always be miles, but hey, he gets there. he’ll still always have his snark but he won’t be a Genuine Asshole to people he loves. heck, i imagine he’ll be downright soft in the right situation. and he can be gentle and kind. he’s a salty boy not a cunt

but i digress. basically he’s a little “yeah, yeah, i love you too, shut up” about it but he does have that soft gooey center. basically those who know him, and love him, know his true heart. it’s just a part of being miles “defensive walls” straume

feels love (and even that takes him a while to realise, cuz he hasn’t been a romantic relationship kinda guy, most of his life his relationships have been a Just Sex thing), not Great at like... Doing Love, you know what i mean? but like once he’s used to it, he can be quite a tender little pudding cup, actually

[brainboys]

[TOM HOLLAND, CISMALE, HE/HIM] have you seen QUINN WRIGHT around sedona? QUINN is a UNIVERSITY STUDENT/PART-TIME PIZZA DELIVERY GUY, but they’re also THE ENCYCLOPEDIA in the sedona sleuths, so you’ve probably seen them around the firehouse shed. they’re known for being QUICK-WITTED and EARNEST, but they’re also known to be GULLIBLE and IMPULSIVE. when they’re not at the shed, i can usually find them at the PIZZERIA. i can always recognize them by their untied shoelaces, a carefully curated pokemon card collection, adept fingers pressing away on a nintendo, the rush of exhaustion after being late and misplaced optimism. 

biography, playlist, pinterest board & connections.

the encyclopedia:  The brains of the group, they know loads of random facts that come in handy in the tightest of situations. They’re also probably the one doing the background research when needed.

B A S I C S :

name: quinn wright. nickname:  quinn. age: twenty-two. date of birth: october 11th. place of birth: sedona, ka. gender: cismale. pronouns: he/him. sexuality: gay (not out).

P H Y S I C A L :

height: 173cm. build: slim. hair color: brown. eye color: brown. tattoos: none. piercings: none. preferred style of clothing: fashion is not a topic of interest to him,   so he tends to lean towards comfort over style.   he doesn’t go shopping for clothes often,   so he rotates between a few graphic t-shirts,   button-ups,   and light sweaters for the summer.   in winter,   he wears over-sized hoodies and sweatpants as often as he can get away with it.   he hopes people don’t notice,   but he only owns two pairs of jeans and slightly over-sized dress pants for emergencies. 

H E A L T H :

physical ailments: none. mental disorders: dyslexia,   combined ADHD & battling with depression.  smoker? no. drinker? socially. drug user? no. addictions: none. allergies: none.

P E R S O N A L I T Y :

zodiac signs: libra sun,   gemini moon. mbti: enfp-t, the campaigner. hogwarts house: gryffindor. positive traits:

quick-witted: quinn is known for being quick on his feet,  but that’s not only in a physical sense.    when someone pushes him against a corner,   whether it’s with a comment made to tease him or a new revelation during an investigation that throws them off,    he’s sharp with a silver tongue rapier and speedily familiarizes himself with information,   easily readjusting it into what he already has in a way that tends to get them out of difficult situations. 

earnest: this is a trait he had to learn,   for better or for worse.   it’s something he actively forces himself to be in order to get anything done.   since his mind tends to be scattered and he’s doing or thinking about doing five things at once,   and then something else,   he uses tactics he learned at therapy to focus on tasks he needs to get done and that includes having a lot of conviction for the things that other people can do with ease,   like sitting down for long enough to finish a rough draft of an essay without getting distracted for a whole day.   he applies this mostly to schoolwork and day-to-day necessities,   but when they’re working on a new mystery,   quinn sits himself down and does research on the background.   this is something he genuinely enjoys doing,   so he struggles less to focus on it. 

friendly: while he doesn’t stray away from the sleuths,   he has no problems making friends and talking to strangers outside of the group.   he can be shy with new people and prefers being around those who he already knows,   but if left alone at a party,   he’ll have a new friend group in ten minutes.

negative traits:

gullible: quinn really is this tiktok.   someone could tell him anything and he’d be like   ‘ ok yeah why not ’   even though it’s an obvious lie.   he takes everything at face value and rarely tries to see what’s behind people’s words.   people have told him to stop being so trusting towards others,   especially when they’re working on solving something,   but quinn really does the same shit over and over because it’s in his nature to just trust people and not think to question their intentions.  

impulsive: compliment him all you want about how smart he is,   the only reason he’s got so much knowledge inside of his brain is that he has no impulse control and if he suddenly has the thought that he needs to know something about how the future might look like with self-operated cars,   ways of murdering someone through poison,   the algorithm behind rubix cubes or literally any topic under and beyond the sun,   he’ll obsess over it for a few days.   quinn gets hyperfixations because of his ADHD and they range from videogames to wildly specific points in history. 

anxious: anxious counts as one of quinn’s primary moods,   and sometimes anxiety comes right in the middle of a perfectly normal day if anything goes slightly wrong,   like losing his favorite pen or realizing that he forgot to grab his lunch box before leaving the house that day.   since quinn tries really hard to keep a schedule,   he feels off whenever he forgets something on it and it brings down his whole mood.   in stressful situations,   quinn paces back and forth with anxiety,   whispering to himself and trying to catch up with his brain.   this usually means that he’s thinking really hard on finding a way to solve a situation,   though sometimes he’ll be so anxious that it impedes him from thinking straight.

love language: physical touch & words of affirmation.  hobbies: video games (lots of them), collecting pokemon cards, keeping up on scientific developments, researching the sleuth’s cases, running, murder mysteries and general mysteries, and whatever his new hyperfixation is. fears: not fitting in, failure, abandonment, needles.

B A C K G R O U N D ,   T D ; L R :

tw: mentions of cancer, death, and homophobia.

quinn basically grew up in queen’s pizzeria.    that’s where his mom worked when he was a kid,   so his dad would pick him up from school and drop him off there for the rest of his mom’s shift because he needed to go back to his own job and the pizzeria is where they allowed quinn to hang-out. 

he struggled a lot with school and was labeled as a problem child.   he hated doing school work and he fell behind in reading,   but when quinn entered high-school,   he was diagnosed with dyslexia and combined ADHD.    by that time,   his parents had already gotten divorced after spending quinn’s childhood poorly hiding their frequent fights.    his mom also got diagnosed with cancer,   and times were rough.

his dad remarried and quinn stayed with his mom throughout her illness.   at one point,   when the bills were too high even though he was working part-time at the pizzeria,   he convinced his mom to let him go off his meds and join a sports team at school instead.   it was to ease the financial strain off them,   and it only helped a little bit. 

quinn joined track and kept going to therapy.   his mom had ups and downs but mostly downs,   since medication would stop working after a while until they realized that they were only temporarily treating her cancer but they wouldn’t be able to cure it.    it gave them time to prepare for her death,   so they did.

his mom taught him what she could about living independently from her before she passed away,   though quinn doesn’t think that any amount of preparation could prepare him for the grief that came. 

he moved out of his childhood home and into his dads place with his new family,    a stepmom and two stepsiblings.   he lived in the basement,   which was his choice,   and quit his job at the pizzeria to focus on school and track full-time like he’d promised his mom.   his dad has always been high-key homophobic so at some point in high school quinn dated the first girl who said yes because he was having doubts about his sexuality and he was afraid of it. 

after graduating high school,   quinn decided to pick up his old job again during the summer between graduation and his new year at sedona’s community college and he’s been working there ever since.   he tries to ask his dad for as little as possible since he’s already paying for his tuitions.   quinn wants to build a career in biochemical engineering,   so he’s studying biology and hopes to transfer to the nearest university where they offer that degree even if it’s post-graduate. 

he broke up with his girlfriend after graduating high-school and honestly his dad’s going to be homophobic no matter what so forcing himself into a relationship he didn’t want was just toxic for both parties involved and he’d never do it again,   especially because he let it go on for so long. 

and that’s it for this part !   his biography has everything much more coherently laid out but tbh it’s kinda long so !!

H E A D C A N O N S :

quinn is really enthusiastic about pokemon so if ur thinking of a gift,   u can’t go wrong with anything related to it.   it’s been his favorite show and video games since he was a child so there’s a lot of nostalgia tied to it. 

quinn has a ton of game apps on his phone and he rarely uses social media.   whenever he’s bored and sitting around,   he prefers playing a game rather than scrolling through a feed.   he also carried around his nintendos...   the nintendo console depends on which game he’s playing but he’s often seen with the 3ds or switch. 

whenever someone interrupts him,   whether it’s mid-sentence,   mid-homework,   mid-whatever-task,   they’ll always get his ‘oh shit’ face because he knows it’ll be hard to focus on whatever he was doing again.   if his thoughts or sentences are interrupted,   he 100% won’t pick up where he left off unless someone reminds him. 

quinn’s often seen with headphones on because he prefers to listen to books since reading is a whole ass task that requires a lot of focus that he doesn’t have and dyslexia absolutely makes things worse.   when texting,   auto-complete is his savior. 

quinn has loved dinosaurs ever since he read jane yolen’s children's books in primary school.   if it has a dinosaur on it,   he’ll buy it. 

he hates the way alcohol tastes but he thinks that drinking is cool so he won’t tell anyone about it.    he honestly doesn’t even drink to get drunk because he’s a good boy but if holding a beer makes him look like he fits in,   he’s going to hold a beer.

quinn...    tries to fit in.   he’s friendly by nature but he doesn’t think that’s enough.   it might have to do with the comments his dad used to make about homosexuality that made him feel like he has to fit a certain mold or else he won’t be accepted by others. 

he’s known he was gay since high-school but he has only really dated a girl.   he’s afraid of being intimate with a boy because he knows that’s what he wants but he has been suppressing that part of himself and thinks that he still needs to suppress it because of his dad.   

the reason he got re-hired at the pizzeria is that the owner has a quinn-shaped soft spot,   not because he’s good at the job.   quinn has the tendency to be late on deliveries and anyone who tries to get free pizzas will get mouthfuls from him about how it’ll come out of his paycheck and please please please just pay for this pizza i swear i won’t be late next time....   but guess what ?    he’s late next time. 

anddddd i think i’ll leave it at that !!   i’m hella excited to plot with everyone so check out his wanted connections list n i’m sure we can work something out !!!!!!!!!

[bookbeani]

A Girl Like That by Tanaz Bhathena

“Abdullah had told me about such girls. NATO, he called them. No action, talk only. The ones who kissed like whores and then cried like virgins.”

Goodreads Summary: Sixteen-year-old Zarin Wadia is many things: a bright and vivacious student, an orphan, a risk taker. She’s also the kind of girl that parents warn their kids to stay away from: a troublemaker whose many romances are the subject of endless gossip at school. You don't want to get involved with a girl like that, they say. So how is it that eighteen-year-old Porus Dumasia has only ever had eyes for her? And how did Zarin and Porus end up dead in a car together, crashed on the side of a highway in Jeddah, Saudi Arabia? When the religious police arrive on the scene, everything everyone thought they knew about Zarin is questioned. And as her story is pieced together, told through multiple perspectives, it becomes clear that she was far more than just a girl like that.

Rating: ★☆☆☆☆

My Thoughts: This is officially the worst book I’ve read, ever, which is not something I say lightly. It’s a contemporary young adult novel set in Saudi Arabia that’s supposedly meant to bravely expose rape culture, but all it does is expose the author’s own islamophobia and girl-on-girl hate. Now, it’s a subtle islamophobia, and I suppose a subtle hate if you’re not looking for it, and maybe that’s why it’s gone largely unnoticed so far. But if anything, it’s more glaringly harmful for its subtlety. Let me take you on a tour through this novel, across the dozens upon dozens of quotes and bookmarked pages, and maybe I’ll be able to make myself a little more clear.

Let’s begin with the fact that Tanaz Bhathena clearly did no research when it came to Islam – which is sort of concerning considering she wrote an entire novel set in an Islamic country.  Oh, sure, it seems she knows lots when it comes to the religious police, throwing around everyone’s favourite word, Sharia law, but the history? Apparently the accurate portrayal of that is beyond her. She seems to know a wonderful amount about bridges in hell and eternal damnation, but when it comes to common burial practices? No, not possible, sorry.

Okay, whatever, these are little things, right? Who cares if she doesn’t know that Muslims don’t get buried in coffins or that the three wise men were indeed Zoroastrian priests, that’s not harmful is it? Well, if only it ended there, I could have forgiven this book its shortcomings and moved on with my life.

Let’s move on to the actual Muslim characters portrayed in the novel, shall we? The main character, Zarin, is Zoroastrian, as is the love interest, Porus. The main Muslim characters you see throughout the novel are 1) the religious police 2) Mishal’s family and 3) Farhan’s family. And as far as fucked up representations go, these three really take the cake.  

The religious police: do I really need to say much about them? It seems pretty self-explanatory. They’re a constant threat lurking throughout the novel – reminders that girls must cover up their hair, that unchaperoned interactions between unrelated boys and girls are Not Allowed (funny, that this is only mentioned when Zarin is with other boys, but never when she’s with Perfect Porus), and… that’s pretty much it. Is there any talk of the Muslims who are oppressed by the religious police for their beliefs? The fact that the religious police don’t follow any religion, and are pretty much one step short of being ISIS? Of course not, that would be an almost… positive and accurate portrayal of Islam wouldn’t it? And we can’t have that, obviously. But, ultimately, the religious police are a background thing – they don’t really take centre stage in this novel. That’s where the two families come in.

Enter: the two Muslim families closest to the heart of the story. In one, you’ve got a man who abandoned his first wife for a second, because polygamy is a totally common and normal thing (spoiler: it’s not). You have Mishal, a sixteen-year-old girl whose marriage prospects are “limited to creepy grooms nearly twice or thrice [her] age.” (spoiler: this is also not common, despite what every wonderful portrayal of the middle east would have you think). Mishal, whose brother tells her, after his friend attempts to assault her, “Have you learned nothing about men and the necessity of a proper hijab? Or did you want his attention?”. A brother who says that “A woman’s honor is like a tightly wrapped sweet. If you unwrap a sweet and leave it lying around, you expose it to everything out there. If, by accident, it falls into the dirt – tell me, Mishal, will anyone want to eat it?” Mishal, who lives in a society that believes that sex is something that a girl should “[suffer] through like a proper virgin.” (spoiler: also not true). All this, while Abdullah reads porn magazines, smokes, dates multiple girls, and Mishal the prude watches, scandalized. Not to mention the fact that since their father moved out to live with his new wife, he’s legally the “guardian of the household” and this is something that’s not questioned, even once, by anyone. What a great, wonderful, functional family, right? What a fantastically positive portrayal. But it gets worse.

Farhan’s family is where things start to get properly disgusting. How is it first introduced? Here are the actual first lines of Farhan’s point of view in the entire book, no joke: “They were going at it like dogs, Abba and the maid. My father, who my mother said I would look like when I got older – tall, dark, and handsome – banging the maid so hard that he banged the headboard against the wall and left a mark in the paint.” Yeah, a great start, isn’t it? So aside from a cheating father (because the only two Muslim fathers portrayed in the novel have to be these disgusting men who can’t possibly have a healthy relationship with a single wife, it’s impossible), you have the disgustingness that is Farhan himself. Farhan, who’s most renowned as being the school heartthrob. But unlike your usual YA contemporary heartthrob, because all these characters are Muslim, and thus must be degenerate somehow, right, this one drugs girls to get with them, sexually assaults them, and rapes them. On a regular basis. How wonderful, right?

Thus ends the part where I talk about how terrible each of these characters are, and we can move on to more of the general horrors that make up this book. If my above description hasn’t been clear enough, I’m just going to say it: you have the female characters portrayed as these sexually repressed individuals, completely lacking agency, while pretty much the only reason any of the male characters (aside from Perfect Porus, who wants to get to know Zarin for who she is, like the great non-Muslim guy he is) live is for sex.

In general, this book’s obsession with sex is seriously ridiculous. The entire first third of the novel, the only things that happen are that different people have sex, think about having sex, or judge other people for having sex – that is literally it, I’m not exaggerating in the least. Yes, teenagers are hormonal. Yes, they think about having sex a lot. But that is literally the only thing these characters are characterized by. None of the girls have any hobbies, other than gossiping about boys and hating on other girls (and by other girls I mean Zarin). There is not a single healthy girl-girl relationship in the whole book. In fact, the only relationship in the whole book that can actually be termed healthy is the one between Zarin and Porus. Funny, isn’t it?

There’s a lot more I could go into, honestly – the astonishing relationship between Zarin and her aunt (who started shaming her niece at the age of four for “spreading her legs and sitting like a boy”), the slut-shaming rampant throughout the whole book, the idea that a girl has to bleed when she loses her virginity, the inevitability of arranged marriage for not only Mishal but all the female characters, the objectification of girls for their boobs (seriously, there is a concerning hyperfixation on boobs for some reason, you’d think this was written by a white man because this is almost titting down stairs level boobery), a debate that only seems to show domestic abuse as normalized in this society, and more.

I can hardly begin to explain how damaging something like this is – a book that’s being lauded as this brave exposure of misogyny and rape culture, but is written in such bad taste. The context of this book makes the whole discussion fraught with damaging implications, and the lack of any good, or positive, or normal characters in the whole book to counterbalance all the shitty ones is really inexcusable. 

In conclusion, this book is cancelled. 

Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk.

[alley-cat-sunflower]

Pretending to have been tagged by @yuutolovesturtles​, who left it open-ended, because I just love talking about myself. (Also because I don’t know how to make the font all tiny-like on my own, so I’d like to save this for reference…)

The Last

Drink: Water.

Phone call: My supervisor, nitpicking church bulletin details.

Text message: Received? My mom telling me she was on her way home. Sent? Confirming that I received the message.

Song you listened to: The main battle theme from FFXV: Episode Ignis.

Time you cried: Half of yesterday as well as half the day before.

Have You Ever

Dated someone twice: I don’t really “date” people, but I have had a crush on someone, gotten over it, then decided to give it a try years later anyway.

Kissed someone and regretted it: Not really.

Been cheated on: Not to my knowledge.

Lost someone special: Kinda sorta not really?

Been depressed: Almost all the time. Trying to get better.

Gotten drunk and thrown up: I’ve never been drunk or even tipsy because I don’t like alcohol enough to drink it fast enough to feel anything. Also, being emetophobic, the possibility of throwing up is one of the main reasons I don’t drink.

3 Favorite Colors

Indigo

Scarlet

Cerulean

In The Last Year Have You

Made new friends: Yes, a couple. Started talking to the best lead at the dance hall, and now we’re pretty close. Had a classmate last semester who showed me more about myself and the world around me, but he’s missing in action at the moment. Working on making friends among other classmates this semester, too.

Laughed until you cried: Yes. I think the last time had something to do with my wonderful and ridiculous boyfriend, but I can’t swear to it.

Found someone was talking about you: Yes…? What does this mean?

Met someone who changed you: Absolutely; the aforementioned classmate.

Found out who your friends are: I guess? Expanded my circle a bit.

Kissed someone on your Facebook list: I don’t really use Facebook that often, but considering my boyfriend has one, I’d say so.

How many Facebook friends do you know: Why would I have any FB friends I don’t know?

Do you have any pets: Three cats at my dad’s house.

Do you want to change your name: Not really.

What did you do for your last birthday: Had a minor nervous breakdown, nbd.

What were you doing at midnight last night: Writing things I really, really shouldn’t.

Name something you can’t wait for: Final Fantasy VII Remake!!

When was the last time you saw your mom: Like, a few minutes ago? She just went into the garage to rearrange some stuff.

What are you listening to right now: “Valse di Fantastica” from Final Fantasy XV.

Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: That’s one of my cousins, so yeah.

Something that is getting on your nerves: Walt Whitman.

Most visited websites: Tumblr, YouTube, various wikis (for research purposes).

Hair color: Brown.

Long or short hair: Long.

Do you have a crush on someone: I’m honestly not sure anymore.

What do you like about yourself: Hard to find anything these days… I guess I like that I’m passionate about things, even if they’re not exactly the ‘right’ things. And I like my writing ability, even if I tend to misuse it.

Blood type: I don’t know, actually.

Nickname: Alley or Alley Cat, in internet circles.

Relationship status: Not sure of the exact parameters as of now, but taken.

Zodiac: Wood Boar with Snake ascendant; double Aquarius with Aries rising.

Pronouns: She/her.

Favorite TV show: I don’t watch a lot of TV… Monty Python’s Flying Circus?

Tattoos: None. Might get the planetary symbol for Uranus someday, though.

Right or left-handed: Right.

Surgery: None to speak of, and I don’t want any either.

Sports: I can’t play any to save my life, but I like watching San Francisco Giants baseball. Except for last year. Last year royally sucked.

Pair of shoes: Like, my favorite? I wear the same damn pair of leather boots every day.

Eating: Just had dinner, courtesy of my mother. Salmon, spinach, and rice with mushrooms.

Drinking: Water. Considering tea, though.

Waiting: For the FFXV Royal Edition content to download so I can face Somnus and learn more Ardyn backstory. I know, I know, I’m trash.

Get married: That’s crossed my mind a lot lately, since I recently wrote a wedding and have a couple more marriage-related fics on the back burner, but… I don’t know. That’s a question for another, less unstable time.

Career: I wanna be an author and/or editor someday. I’d love to be able to make money just writing my stories. The main issue is finding the motivation to write out my original ideas instead of hyperfixating on fandoms…

Which Is Better

Hugs or Kisses: Depends, but I’d say hugs overall since there’s only ever been one person whose kisses I have thoroughly enjoyed.

Lips or Eyes: Eyes, typically.

Shorter or Taller: Not like I have a preference, but a lot of my best friends are tall.

Older or Younger: Doesn’t much matter to me. It seems like most of my inner circle are within a couple years of myself either way.

Nice Arms or Nice Stomach: I don’t pay attention…

Hookup or Relationship: Relationship for sure.

Troublemaker or Hesitant: Bit o’ both. Fuck Mars in Pisces.

Kissed a stranger: Noooooooope.

Drank hard liquor: I don’t like alcohol.

Lost glasses/contact lenses: I can’t fuckin see without ’em, so no.

Turned someone down: Roughly once a year or every couple years, for some reason, but I’ve been fortunate to avoid any… untoward encounters. I don’t go out of the house. I don’t put that much effort into my appearance. I don’t go out of my way to socialize. Where did I go wrong?

Sex on the first date: More like “sex within the first year of dating” amirite? And the answer’s still no. It might’ve edged a bit closer to ‘maybe’ within the first few months of knowing someone else, but idk whether that’s changed or not; haven’t seen him in several weeks.

Broken someone’s heart: I… might have? I don’t think so, though. The people who give me their hearts are pretty resilient. I’m usually able to convince them to give them to me platonically instead, and then we’re all happier.

Had your heart broken: Nope. I have been turned down before, but I’m the only one allowed to break my heart, thank you. It’s easier that way.

Been arrested: God, no. Never even been in legal trouble. *knocks on wood*

Fallen for a friend: Nnnnot really? Normally, they’re fairly new faces. My boyfriend was my friend first, has been for seventeen years, but I didn’t really “fall for” him.

Cried when someone died: Oh yes.

Do You Believe In

Yourself: Now and again.

Miracles: Depends on the definition.

Santa Claus: Not anymore.

Kissing on the first date: I mean, clearly it happens? Just not with me?

Also not tagging anyone, because I am the slayer of tag memes; they always end at my doorstep. But this one was actually really fun, so if you wanna do it, please do and tag me! I’m living proof you can get away with taking someone up on that offer!