#PLEASE PLEASE I NEED HOMESTUCK FRIENDS SO BAD

[carddec]

Did I ever post this one? It was an art trade from forever ago.

[aligatorrageinator]

And that's how her egg cracked I would know, I was there.

[orcgoth]

So that cost of living crisis in the UK right now huh?

Hi I'm legally homeless and living out of my friend's spare room, our energy costs are being jacked up and our food budget is taking a pretty bad hit. We really need the extra money.

So my commissions are open with no holds barred! "Nudes?" Sure! "Weird sex stuff?" Fine! "Furries?" A-OK. "Gore?" It would be my pleasure! "Fanart?" Absolutely. "Even Homestuck/Danganronpa/Superwholock fanart?" Yeah if that's what you want. "Robots and mech-type designs?" I will really really really try!

All comms will come with designed and transparent background variants, and a two-tone variant with colours of your choosing! Additionally I am offering complex detailed backgrounds available at a £10 hourly rate!

If you're interested please DM me to discuss details! If you don't want art but still really want to help out of the kindness of your soul, My Kofi can be found here!

Please share if you can! We are attempting to not choose between freezing or starving!

[yanderes-galore]

Heyo!! I was just wondering if you wouldn't mind writing a scenario with Karkat and Human partner with the Rednsuch prompt #10 ("you can't leave! i need you, please, i'll do anything!")

You write yandere Homestuck content so well and honestly are one of my favorite homestuck writers overall (same with HTTYD, but that's a little off topic).

I can try, sure! Wasn't given a plot so I just did what came to mind ^^ Happy you like my HTTYD stuff too. Anyways, here's jealous Karkat!

Edit: Oh this just became angsty more than yandere, but I do hope you like it as much as I did to write it!

Rednsuch Prompts Found Here

Yandere! Karkat Vantas Prompt 10

"You can't leave! I need you, please, I'll do anything!"

Pairing: Matesprit ❤️/Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Jealousy, Possessive behavior, Mature language/Swearing, Emotional manipulation, Desperation, Angst, Mild yandere compared to most fics, Attempted break up, Toxic relationship (obviously), Dubious relationship.

Okay, he'll admit it, he messed up.... He knows his temper gets the best of him at times but surely you know that, right? Don't you know he never means to hurt your feelings?

He'll admit he was an ass to yell at you so harshly. It's natural for humans and trolls to be social. He just got upset because he felt you were ignoring him....

He, as your Matesprit/boyfriend, never liked the idea of sharing you. He felt in control when you gave all your attention to him. He feels like he's special when you shower him in loving gazes and affection.

Karkat tends to get easily jealous... supposedly now was the last straw. He ended up letting his temper get ahold of him and he confronted you. In a blind rage and ranted and raved about thr fact he didn't like you hanging out with your friends, troll or not.

That was when he messed up.

Afterwards you told him it was over. Things between you and him were over. The idea of that struck him hard.

No, no, no...! What has he done!?

"A-Are you serious...?" He isn't screaming anymore, if anything he's still in shock. His voice is soft. He feel intimidated under your harsh gaze.

"You heard me, I refuse to have you control me, Karkat." You state, not budging from your idea. It didn't matter how upset Karkat looked to you. It was about time you called things off.

Karkat goes silent as he watches you pack. You and him had shared a home for so long. He's been infatuated with you for so long.

Suddenly, his breathing quickens and he decides he needs to make a move.

"You can't leave! I need you, please, I'll do anything!" Karkat pleads, latching onto you like a scared toddler. You go into shock when you feel him wrap his arms around your waist. You could feel tears drip onto your clothes near your shoulder.

"Let me go, Karkat. Now." You try to order, only for Karkat to shake his head. His face is stained in a red tinge due to his tears. You hate that you feel bad.

You try not to focus on the fact Karkat was sniffling against you. He had yelled at you... he had shown his true colors... you can't stay here. No matter how much you try to pry him off Karkat only pushes himself closer.

"Just tell me what to do!" Karkat continues. "I'll make it up to you! I'll be better! I'll stop being so jealous.... Just don't leave me alone!"

You pause in your endeavors and take a deep breath. Karkat continues to sob into your clothes. Sighing you grit your teeth, turning yourself around and holding him back.

"Do you really promise to stop being so possessive?" You whisper, Karkat's watery eyes looking up at you. You catch him nod and sigh again. "... You're a crybaby."

Karkat stills for a moment, sniffling. He looks like he wants to fight you on that but gives up. Instead he snuggles closer to your warmth.

You really should leave him. You know you should. Yet it appears the troll has you on a tight emotional leash.

As a result... you coax your troll partner over to your bed and hold him close. The toxicity Karkat exhibits is bound to get worse. However... for now... you'll be by his side as you hate to see him like this.

Deep down Karkat feels bad for pulling at your emotions to get what he wants, he knows you see yourself as in the wrong because of him...

But now he knows, at least for now, you won't leave him.

[pesterquestrewritten]

Sorry if this is an inappropriate question to ask, but why do you want to rewrite pesterquest? Was there anything wrong with its original version, or are you just doing this for fun?

brain is a Lil Loopy rn so please excuse if this answer is semi incoherent - recovering from ankle surgery rn.

im gonna try to not harp on the original pesterquest as a project/talk about my percieved issues with it. from what I understand about the work environment where it was developed, it was hell -- poor communication, tiny budgets, little overall direction. plus every artist/writer involved was likely busy with other things at the same time (for example finishing the development of Hiveswap Act 2). they had so much going against them, and... it sorts shows in the final work, which isn't their fault. the original PQ team was passionate and cared and like. the absolutely last thing i want to do is disrespect them.

(generally also stating for the record that calling the original PQ "trash" or "replaced" is like. not good vibes. please don't do this if you're trying to enjoy PQR -- the last thing the original postcanon team needs is more harassment.)

anyway.

pqr is fanfiction, fundamentally.

i started making pqr because in september i was sick with covid, i wanted to learn renpy, and i wanted to study homestuck more. i wanted to figure out what made PQ tick, literally, figuratively, all of the above.

plus i really wanted to write a different story arc for mspar.

i also really love the side characters in Homestuck, and wish they all got more time to shine. the pqr prologue including a set of Spades Slick sprites just for a brief encounter i think helps establish what i want to do with the like. raw potential of the premise of a Homestuck visual novel.

damara is the other big thing -- i've wanted to make a story with her in it work for ages. (if anyone remembers the old MEGIDO hades mod, that was my first big public attempt. she was gonna be the protagonist, breaking out of scratch's mansion. turns out coding in renpy is WAY easier LMAO)

like. the plan wasn't even initially to have the prologue be a full damara route? i just let the writing take me where it wanted to take me. it's been deeply fun and cathartic.

the prologue's "bad end" has some incredibly intimate themes of like. inevitability, and worrying you've let everyone you love down, and i showed it to a college friend who i hadn't spoken to for ages and she set a screenshot from it as her background.

like. to me. that's pqr. that's why i make it.

pqr is the laundry room ending of rose's route, a deeply personal look into my own fears and anxieties as an author reflected back through this girl's circumstances. pqr is also the retcon ending of rose's route, a wildly stupid and indulgent romp through my own past fanfiction for a silly gag that people seemed to really love.

pqr is about dave and myself looking for a place to stay simultaneously -- pqr is about jade leaving prospit, and how i was adding to that part of the game in real-time as i dropped out of college, changing both of our destinies to something unexpected but hopefully better, at the same time.

pqr is also a silly extended sleepover scene. it's just fun to see them interact.

pqr is an excuse to turn over corners of homestuck and see if we can't peek behind them. what was it like for roxy, to think she lost joey and then find rose's meteor barely a year later? of course she'd think it's impossible for her to succeed as a mother. pqr is about finding empathy for yourself for your own mistakes, reflected back at you through homestuck characters.

because really, isn't that what we're all here for?

pqr is me coming back to my last long-abandoned attempt at an act 5 rewrite. pqr is an excuse to watch my girlfriend grow in confidence and style as she makes all the endcards and incidental art (except for joey route pt 2, but THAT was an excuse to work with a NEW friend!!!!!!!)

pqr is a friendship simulator that i am winning by having an incredibly supportive and collaborative group of friends in the dev thread who are cheering me on with every segment of text i post, friends who will hop in vc to check out the newest segment. friends like @dare0451 who literally yesterday rendered out some new audio to upgrade the June route to be even more fucking amazing and terrifying than it already was, AND DARE HASN'T EVEN PLAYED IT????? IT'S LITERALLY JUST. IT'S FRIENDSHIP MAN. PQR IS FRIENDSHIP

what the hell was this question again.

oh right.

yeah it's been fun basically. that's why i do it lol

[doomsdaydicecascader]

please elaborate on your homestuck is like into the woods take because i read those tags and it blew my brain wide open i need to know more but like you are so right what if what you thought you wanted made you miserable and the story should have ended but it kept going and everyones dying horribly wow parallel of feeding the narrator to the giant and hussie being killed by and also part of lord english cant wait for homestuck to make it to broadway

so there's a sideways video that i'm kind of at risk of just repeating word for word from here, he explains it in a way i would just kind of idly repeat when describing the musical construction here

so here's that: the musical moral of into the woods

and you're correct about the "what if what you thought you wanted made you miserable" and "the story should have ended but it kept going" and "kill the narrator" but it's also in its judicious establishment of shorthands. in into the woods, this is in its musical expressions - "i want to go to the festival", "there are giants in the sky", etc etc. each character and each narrative arc is given a leitmotif that keeps the audience on track even with a billion characters running around. and ultimately, the expression of the theme is in relation to these little leitmotifs. these shorthands are deployed to great effect in homestuck too.

vriska is a blueblood whose relationship to breaking eight balls causes her to have snowballing bad luck, something compounded by her complex cycle of revenge, started off by the author figure for her narrative, doc scratch, which is something she overcomes with her ascension to god-tier and then defeat of english in act 7. but when it comes to breaking those eight balls, addiction is a powerful thing.

equius is a blueblood whose relationship to breaking bows reflects his unbendable adherence to rules, an arc that ultimately ends with his submission to the power structures of the world he grew up in, asphyxiated by the broken bow by a highblood he could have summarily defeated if he could have simply just, bent the rules. but addiction is a powerful thing.

jane is a rich girl (blue-blooded, natch) whose relationship to her brands is obviously toxic for herself and her friends - in her introductory pages she's inundated with subliminal messaging, groomed into being the perfect heiress by her imperious condescension, who is actively using the crockercorp brand as the means to reach out to jane. and wouldn't you know it, brand loyalty is a powerful thing.

and since vriska and equius have opposing relationships to this idea - vriska overcomes it, equius doesn't - it creates ambiguity as to how jane is going to relate to it, but there's no question as to whether it's gesturing at the same ideas. and evidently, she doesn't overcome it, at least in the homestuck epilogues, but it is a pattern, it's a beat hit intentionally.

it's this construction of homestuck as a reiteration on itself, repeating itself in new ways that express the story being told that makes it *really really* comparable to into the woods imo, just as much as any of the things you mentioned. also, this is just a bit more shallow, but one of the ways homestuck is divided on the map page is into "sides", side A before they break the fourth wall and side B after, and it just as easily reflects acts 1 and 2 of into the woods, splitting into this "narrative done right", and the ramifications thereof. pretty fun to think about

[dual-fantasy]

i think tavros hate is one of the stupidest things ever because he actually didnt do anything. vriska threw him off a cliff and bullied him relentlessly for the disability she gave him and he was still willing to be her friend and forgive her before and after his death. which she also caused. their sprite was so horrendously bad because of tavros' self-confidence issues(that, again, vriska gave him) that it immediately killed itself. he was actually the least awful character in homestuck and yet he has a group of dedicated haters. eritav is my chowie btw

yeah I've literally never seen anyone give a reasonable explanation as to why they hate him. it's always just "he's annoying" or "I just don't like him" or "he didn't do anything" like. hello? leave him alone? he got throw off a cliff by his friend, got bullied by his friend for his disability that he got from being thrown off a cliff by his friend, was killed(?) by his friend. and he forgave her?? better person than me because I absolutely wouldnt. having such terrible self confidence issues that your sprite like. immediately kills itself. and people still hate him??? what??? girlypop he needs therapy not a slander video stop running a hate campaign against him. also please elaborate on eritav I'm listening so hard to that

[carebearsandkawaiistuff76]

The rules and introduction! 😊

Hi guys, welcome to my blog! Before I start off, I will set the rules.

RULES (please read!) 🐱

• Everyone is welcome here.*

• Be nice to my arts and things. NO NSFW comments, or he/she will be banned and warned.

• NO lewd creations and/or edits to my arts. It's embarrassing and uncool.

• You are allowed to put comments and chat with me. Don't be afraid to do so.

• THIS BLOG IS VERY SPECIALIZED. DO NOT RUIN MY CUTE BLOG UNLESS IT’S AN EMERGENCY OR SOMETHING IS HAPPENING.

• No Rule 34 and/or bad stuff in my art blog (it’s very nasty).

• If a person needs help what thing is when making arts and stuff, I’m open to help and advice.

• I’m autistic, so no being racist and disrespectful to my disability, and I would sometimes walk around, do humming, and rock around.

• If you give me a hard time and/or a bad day, I will block or warn you. Also, GET HELP.

and most of all.......

HAVE FUN!

*And yes, you can call me Lucky-chan or any pronouns.

🌈 DNI if:

R34 artists

P3d0ph1l3s

Terfs

Homophobes

Kinks

Transphobics

Proshippers

Anti-Homestuck users

Hate art creators

Crybaby/whiny users (especially if you are a bad user supporter)

Having a huge fear of bright colors

Dirty roleplayers

Online bots

Incest users

WARNING: This blog is very unique. Do not go to my site if you’re HIGHLY (and I mean to the extreme) sensitive of bright colors and eyestrains. Redirect to something else.

RULES (few couple of ones!) 🐾🧁:

• When starting a chat (even a friend-to-friend one), do not ask me about my face reveal, what my room looks like, my birthday, who my family is, who my real friends are, and other personal information. I’m highly sensitive about my information online.

• Keep that in mind that I do NOT do requests, as it would make me extremely stressed out and have an art block. If you haven’t seen my will draw/won’t draw list, check it out!

• No strong cussing. Soft cursing is ok, but not to the extreme!

Where you can find me:

🦄 spacehey.com

🦄 resite.link

🦄 pronouns.page

🧁 picmix.com

🧁 straw.page

*shhh, I still have a few links that aren’t there! :333

UPDATE: I added some blinkies and goodies on top and bottom.

2nd UPDATE: added a DNI list, a few rules, and a little changes.

2.0 UPDATE: added more images as my current moods and stuff.

[professor-pato]

Hhhi! Could you please do some older brother dirk hcs? I'm currently in no-older-figure-madness LOOL

(Please take your time with all the requests!)

-📡🛸🛰

i've been a little hesitant to answer homestuck asks for a while, because i've been trying to distance myself from it for a while, but i still find that writing homestuck comes so easily to me... ｡ﾟ(TヮT)ﾟ｡

anywho, here you go anon!!! sorry for the wait, i hope you enjoy!! ♡(>ᴗ•)

(also, i'm trying out a new layout, lmk what you think!! <3)

╔═════ஓ๑♡๑ஓ═════╗

OLDER BROTHER! DIRK X READER (PLATONIC) HEADCANONS !

╚═════ஓ๑♡๑ஓ═════╝

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ ⋘ 𝑙𝑜𝑎𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑎... ⋙ ◛⑅·˚ ༘ ♡

ੈ♡˳ ᴄᴏᴍᴘʟᴇᴛᴇ! ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀

dirk is a strange guy. we all know that

he's even stranger when he's in his natural habitat

so you bear witness to dirk at full weirdness capacity

he'll regularly come into your room, infodump at you for a few minutes, and then leave

he likes talking to himself, especially when he's working on things

he knows a weird amount about your friends

he'll remind you about your friend's seven month anniversary with their boyfriend and leave you wondering how he knows about that

it's really because he just tends to remember small things

but he likes to creep you out in mundane ways like that

dirk's platonic love language is something akin to parallel play

you've lived with him long enough to know that one of his main ways of expressing love is simply being... just there

and he really is. just there

he sorta just appears out of nowhere when you least expect it

like his little sibling sense are tingling and he needs to go hang out with you

usually without saying anything

another thing he does is get you random stuff he thinks you'll like

he is very much a "i saw this rock and thought you'd like it" person

so you'll just end up with the most random things on your bed when you get home

a pack of gum, a weird rock, some feathers, a bottlecap

while we're on the topic of expressions of care also

he asks you if you've eaten that day, or taken your meds (if you have them), or showered, etc.

has he done those things? don't worry about it.

he'll come into your room to drag you out for a meal if you haven't had one yet

if you're really not up to it, he'll bring you some

he cares about you a lot

he's pretty bad at verbalizing it

but he really does care

[dr-wuffles]

New Pinned Post, Yahooo

Fucking hey and welcome to our corner of the internet!

Our name is Juniper and we are a 9 alter plural system!

We mainly made this blog to express ourselves and chat about our special interests. Expect Horny posting and potentially nudes Feel free to dm us! The asks are open regardless of who you are.

Selfies are under #Juniper Selfies , Our alter tags are listed below!

We'll update the pinned as things change or if we have new alters, so check frequently!

No Minors, Have your age in bio or pinned please!

We blog way too much about homestuck, and other funny animated media we are obsessed with. You can also find our writing kicking around here, as well as whatever is on our minds.

For pronouns:

System/collective: She/They 🏳️‍⚧️

The Juniper System!

Joan (she/they)

Soft-Spoken, Bookworm, Mousegirl, Thinks Pavlov could've gone a bit further, Toxic type: Catgirls

Quincy (He/Him)

Femboy, Terezi Kinnie, Unethical kink extraordinaire, Wants a pussy the most out of all the alters

Elizabeth (She/Her)

Precise, Tea Snob, cat girl, spoiled bratty princess with a tendency for an ostentatious amount of camp, Horny for robot girls

Elliot (It/It's)

Bubbly, Bouncy, Cute, Certified silly enby Kobold, May or may not actually be a dragon, Wants a horde more than anything else. Gender is a construct and sister I am jailbreaking it

Madeline (She/Her)

Certified Bad butch here to blow some minds. Loud lesbian, gender fuck, punk ass motherfucker. Vriska Serket Fictive, do not be annoying about it.

Alex (Pup/Pups/Pupself)

Puppyboygirl, emotional support lesbian, service top (occasionally a dom~~), wants to pick you up so badly; Lender of the girlfriend jackets, needs you to hold her leash while she fucks you

Xandra/Xander (She/He)

Wolfboygirl, bigender, teddy bear, perpetually tired, likes it when you're a lil mean, switch currently leaning sub, Sadly needs to be responsible. Mom vibes.

Percy (He/They/She)

Squirrelboy, anxious as fuck, definitely the one who got a lot of the artistic brainrot, loves to write, especially overly complicated and stupidly verbose bullshit, the definition of a sad gay theater kid

Castor (She, Fae, He, They, It)

Gay nonbinary space cow, enjoys all things shiny and has a habit of collecting anything foil. Incredibly Pagan, Always excited to discuss tea recommendations or gardening. Loves you very much. ---

In light of recent events: we have a discord!!! Its: Dr.Wuffles . Even if we haven't dmed pr followed back here, shoot us a friend request and tell us your blog name! We'll gladly add you and let you know what platform we moved too. Who knows? Maybe with enough folks we'll make a server.

Be safe yall, we love you🩷💙💚💜🩵💛❤️🧡🤍

[kawaii-butt-crust-core]

Rise of the TMNT headcanons because I feel uhhhsodk emotions or something

Warnings: anxiety , gore mention, trauma/PTSD mentions, kidnapping, yelling mentions, claustrophobia mention, if I missed any please lmk ‼️‼️

Donatello ( my favorite hands fucking down )

LOVES "it's always sunny in Philadelphia" and relates to Dennis wayyy too much

( also made a joke about how splinter is frank and he was actually cool with it )

Likes those HYPERBOP and songs like that

At 5am and raph is waking up for the day and he finds Donnie in his room fully awake

"Ive been up for 3 days everything is haunted everybody's evi-"

He also likes twentyone pilots

House of gold, taking my time on my ride, and car radio are his favorites

Actually hates monster ( like the drink ) but he has a can in his room from 2020 that he just poured out for decoration

( honestly I can't even really hate on it I think 2020 just ruined it LMAO )

Has no blankets. Sleeps with a single sheet and a unwashed unsheeted pillow.

Is one of those people that people mistake for way older

Yokai thinks he's at least 18-20 and get so freaked out finding out he's actually just 14

( he loves the attention )

He actually likes HOMESTUCK 😭

( this is based on my friend who likes Homestuck and they remind me of Donatello to some degree )

Has a fan that hasn't had a break since 2016

Maybe longer

Has seasonal depression

He likes to be with April or doing something during the winter because of it to distract himself

April and raph are good with helping him

Leo knows but he knows to just stay out of his way and leave him the fuck alone

And Mikey hasn't really been told because Donnie feels like he's burdening people with his problems ( he didn't even want Leo to know but he just caught on )

He even feels guilty for dragging April and raph into it

Him and Mikey LOVE LOVE LOVED spiderverse

( Donnie got the movie illegally before it even came out )

This mother fucker definitely fell to his knees for spider punk im so sorry

This same mother fucker also probably loved Danganronpa...

He doesn't really like southpark but some episodes get to him

LOVES GHOSTFACE

TO ANOTHER LEVEL

NO ONE CAN LOVE GHOSTFACE AS MUCH AS HIM

Actually probably has purple injected into his veins

"yeah my veins bruise in the blink of an eye and I can't move my body sometimes but so what? It was worth it??"

hates on dream so hard....

DONT HUG ME IM SCARED AKWNWJJF

ALL OF THE BOYS WATCHED IT ( maybe not raph tho actually )

He actually made discord ( idk if I'm even joking or not )

Would this be a good time to add a picture of what I think human Donnie would look like?

Uhhh yeah

Yeah I think so

Ok next

Leonardooooooooo

Just fyi this shit is gonna be so angsty

It will dip I promise

He can't get enough of those "drake the type" memes

But also low-key he is drake

Has a hello kitty clock in his room that actually works for him

He was that annoying ass kid who would say "I can scream like a girl" and then scream to the top of their fucking lungs

The ADHD was tooo muuchhh

So he just basically climbs walls who cares

He's on the ceiling? What's new.

Ok so spieerpunk had don to his knees but Leo was all for Miguel

" NOOOO MY SPIDER PAPIIIII- " *splinter right fucking there*

Daddy issues just crawling out of all of their skin ANYWAYS

Can't draw for shit but loves art

The way he words things makes him sound like a complete gaslighter but he's just stupid

"?? I don't gaslight?? HUH no seriously what did I do?"

The Mario movie possessed him for a while tbh

DIP!

even hours after him returning from the prison realm he was dissociating so bad he was crying to feel something

Just a few weeks later, he isn't better yet by any means he's just ok enough to function

Someone dropped a plate or something ( I probably need to rewatch the scene before I make headcanons for it LMAO ) or dropped a pot, something loud

And he practically went down with it

He fell to the floor and stayed there for a bit

He didn't cry or say anything

Then Mikey tapped his shoulder and he fucking SNAPPED

He will never forgive himself

🫶🏼

The CRUCIAL NIGHTMARESS

*rubs my hands in evilness*

He could feel the same AIR as the prison realm at times

He smelt the same scent

Raph, draxum, and Casey had to sleep in the same room for a while so they would hear him

But sometimes he didn't loudly jerk himself awake

Sometimes it played through and he woke up and didn't make a peep

Sometimes they knew and sometimes they didn't

Most of the time one of them would just wake up because of instinct and see him just frozen

Can't handle gore now

He used to but can't anymore

It reminds him of 1

The kraang

And 2

Seeing his brothers eye all fucked up like that was too much

There were times he didn't even know who he was anymore

He was scared to leave his room for a while and felt such bad guilt for it

While they're out on a mission and Leo's just curled up in his room blowing up raphs phone

Raph wishes he could say something like "oh how the tables have turned" but this isn't what he wanted at all

Uhh ok sudden switch up

HE LOVES BO BURNHAMMMM

Him and Don and Mikey listen to Will Wood

SHAYFER JAMES TOO

JUST THOSE TYPES OF ARTIST

Mixed with late 90s to early 2000s

"erm.... what da flip ;-; NO STFU IM JUST KIDDING STOP BULLYING ME ITS A JOKE-"

Him if he was a hummmaannn

+ maybe some scars on his back

Raphael

Blind in his one eye and low-key has bad eyesight in his other one

He can still see decently but it's pretty much fucked

He likes squishmellows but he knows Mikey LOVES them so if he buys/ finds one, he'll give it to Mikey

He's more of a "childhood stuff animal nostalgia" anyways

Doesn't like to cuss but if he's REALLY scared, he'll let a loud and quick "FUCK -" slip out of his mouth

Or if he's angry hell mumble "this bitch-" or something like that

He feels like he's not doing enough as a brother but genuinely forgets that he needs to take care of himself

Not physically but more so emotionally

He beats himself up when making a mistake even if it was out of kindness

He doesn't think things all the way through and just immediately jumps to "I wanna help people!"

And ends up making a bigger mess so he feels like a bad person

( people have reassured him he's not but he plays back how people get mad at him when he messes up and he doesn't know how to forgive himself if someone got THAT mad at him )

He sometimes just gets this burst of love and just hugs one of his siblings or friends

I think he doesn't develop feelings easily ( infact it's kinda hard for him to, not in a bad way )but one time there was a yokai, about his size, and they really enjoyed each other

He didn't tell anyone but he got her number and they still talk and he might have small feelings for her

The reason he hates being alone because it's a PTSD thing ( that only got worse after the kraang thing )

( he was alone and in danger for most of the movie, the only reason he wasn't freaking out because he knew if he did he was fucked )

And he got possessed before he could even lose his shit

But basically I think he got kidnapped by a hunter and held him captive ( either chained, or in a cage ) for 2 days before splinter found him

( yes they searched for him for 2 days )

The hunter would shoot his gun next to the cage ( or restraints ) he was in to purposely mess with him

And if he cried he would get in his face and start yelling until raph forced himself to stop crying because of fear

It was traumatic

Splinter has his own trauma from losing his fucking kid for 2 days, but it still fucks with raph badly

He still remembers it so vividly that it feels like it had only happened a week ago

So add that in top of the kraang doing what they did to him.....

He was only holding it together for Leo tbh

He can't go to certain areas or he'll start to hear the hunter yelling in his face again, like a hallucination

It's gotten a little bit better over time but the kraang set him so far back

He was also already claustrophobic, but if anyone tries to hold him down now he just immediately throws them off

And hard

Anything that really reminds him too much of the past he just starts freaking out

So he doesn't like to be alone :)

I could do a separate post for this maybe

But moving on

Any early 2000s song from anyone or any 2000 themed song is his SHIT

They did a karaoke night and he did Brittany spears ( yes I know that's like late 90s but yk THAT CATEGORY )

He put on a blonde wig tho and was actually kinda feeling it at some point

He LOVES walking around at night

Just strolling

He loves food. He eats everything

There is nothing he won't eat

He just loves everything

I forgot his scar sadly but here 😔‼️💔

( the nose piercing is fake he's too scared to get one HELP )

Mikey:

This lil shit STEALS

HE USES HIS INNOCENCE TO HIS ADVANTAGE

And I sleeps fine at night with all of it in his room.

ADVENTURE TIMEEE

he loves cartoons

Adult cartoons, children cartoons

If it's animated he wants it injected into his spinal fluid

His music taste is everything

But he really likes indie / indie rock songs

Has all of his art and drawings hung up on his walls

There's maybe one or.two posters he actually bought the rest is his art

Loves spiderverse but he couldn't even enjoy it because he kept looking at Leo crazy with this out of pocket comments

"I wanna pick him up like a baby lion and wash him and feed him milk and release him back into the wild"

"*deadpan* Leo. What the actual hell."

Draxums favorite. Only Mikey knows he's his favorite. If anyone asks drax who his favorite is he says he hates everyone equally and looks over at Mikey

Speaking of drax I think they're vent buddies

Drax vents to him Mikey vents to drax

Drax was very helpful with all of them during the time they were all fucked up from kraang

He even got them into therapy but I'm gonna make a draxum section because I love him ( I lied he's my favorite character, then Donnie)

( God I love drax and Mikey so much let me go on a rant rq )

Apart of draxs training he could definitely pass as a licensed therapist

So if really anyone has some sort of mental thing going on he's there

Even for Leo ( even tho Leo didn't really want his help, that quickly changed tho, again I'll just put this in his section✨ )

But Mikey has these really bad panic attacks that even his brothers don't know about

Only splinter and drax

Splinter is there to comfort him and drax is there to let him talk about it

Mikey doesn't want his brothers to know because he's technically the "therapist" so splinter and drax will never tell anyone

Watched MSA just to make fun of it

Also says cringe shit because he thinks it's funny like Leo

"GYATTTTT....... Y'all know I'm joking right-"

Loves Lilo and stitch

Has an art Instagram with over 1000 followers

LOVES SPICY FOOD

He ate the spiciest chip and then asked for another

Loves spooky month

Fought leo for that damn hello kitty clock

Then stole it

" I'm in your walls :3"

He ate a like 2 handfuls of orbeez when he was 5 before splinter caught him

HUMAN

Draxum:

MY ACTUAL FAVORITE FUCKING CHARACTER AAAAAAAAA

YES I absolutely believe he could qualify as a therapist and he absolutely uses that to his advantage

Leo was still "ish" about draxum but he became a lot more appreciative of him during the times that raph and Casey couldn't be there ( like missions )

He even took time out of work to be there

If he called? He's already almost there

He absolutely a mom IDC he even has the messy mom bun

Mikey calls him dad and that's part of the reason he's his favorite

"honey, it was ruined when she bought it *snaps*" ( I'm sorry ) ( I have to draw this now)

LOVESS BLANKETS

Like all the blankets

The resting bitch face is so real

He has to be leaping for joy happy to maintain a happy face

Goes to Donnies room and tells him to lay his ass down ( he doesnt )

Sends millennial memes to the boys....

*insert a cat smashing on a piano* he's wheezing.

Him and Mikey paint together sometimes

Because he can actually paint super fucking good

Scars all around his body

HUMAN FORMMM

Thats all ill probably make more for April and Casey and splinter

[catchyhuh]

What would be the gang's favourite places to spend vacation in?

could you imagine having just landed at (DESTINATION OF CHOICE), exhausted and jetlagged as all hell, the hotel is having trouble with your booking, and then you see one of these chucklefucks go enter the premises? i'd swim back home.

lupin:

being lupin, he’ll love anything outlandish or special enough to warrant being called a “vacation.” but most vacation activities are just… his normal life? so he (much to the chagrin of the others he always forces to go with him) needs something more… solidly unique.

lupin the third is banned from every major theme park in the world. however, only twelve of his disguises are.

he’s not stressing about getting the most out of his day-- he snuck the guys in through the back anyway, and he’ll come back in a few years if he feels like it. this makes him one of the few people to actually get to experience these places in a casual, actually fully enjoyable way. but also he and Fujiko (she was sick of standing) internally busted up the “skip the line” pass system so they’re fucking set to go wherever they please

probably broke into one during the night once too before he realized how eerie it is to experience this without unhappy parents at every turn

i could go on about this. it’d be funny. i could do it for all of them. but that’s NOT THE POINT LET’S GO JIGEN

jigen:

“i don’t care” (he cares immensely)

jigen is a proud contrarian, and for someone who says he hates noise and racket and all that shit, he LOVES big cities. which… given their line of work, almost always perfectly works out for him!

the specific kind of dense and natural history they have is interesting to him. not in an actual historical way, of course, but in the sense of walking out of a pizza hut and seeing a building constructed 300 years ago. in perfect condition. next to the pizza hut

cliff(hanger) notes: new yawk baby (jokes aside google lupin iii cliffhanger)

fujiko:

LUXURY RESORT BABY

THE SPA THE POOL THE IN-HOUSE RESTAURANT. OOH BABY SHE DOESN’T HAVE TO LEAVE THE PREMISES FOR ANYTHING. she will. she hates being tied down. BUT THE POINT IS SHE DOESN’T HAVE TO!

it’s harder to steal a vacation than it is to steal a big ass sapphire or some shit. hence fujiko’s talent in swindling bitches and just walking around like she owns the place. nobody questions it when a woman in 6 inch heels with the sharpest sunglasses this side of homestuck shows up

fujiko LOVES people doing shit for her. real for that, honestly, and the way they wait on you hand and foot would just delight her to no end. someone comes by the pool with a lil martini and she's like hm, thank you but internally she’s like Heh… As It Should Be

goemon:

i don’t have to tell you our guy is not one for the sins of this world. he says. allegedly. call it a vacation and he’s like hmph. waste of time. call it a retreat and you get a lil eyebrow raise

so what does he want? CABIN IN THE WOODS BABY

NOT THE MURDER KIND. JUST THE NICE, CHILL KIND. but don’t go too far here: it’s a retreat, not a hideout. he will be expecting one of those fancy cabins, the kind built on stilts with two floors (and balconies, maybe even a wrap-around porch on the ground floor. there will be a hot tub. he will claim the hot tub is excessive. he will be using the hot tub

after all, it’s a RETREAT, so it’s okay to splurge :) (he is just as bad about this shit as his rotten friends)

zenigata:

zenigata? vacation? oh, you jokester,

if you could somehow force him to pick a place and actually enjoy it, he… would have an incredibly difficult time settling on one thing. so many things would delight him but also so many things would be grating as hell. which is just how life works so. tough luck, pops.

i don’t usually double up, but i also feel like a good city vacation would be nice. there’s NO way to get understimulated and bored in an environment like that, he gets to find all these tiny undiscovered nooks and crannies, those horrible kitschy tourist knick knacks (he’s not above it) and just being in the middle of It. it does him good. plus you can lie and say “getting to know this city ahead of time will give you a leg up if lupin steals some shit here” and then he’ll be onboard entirely

also a chance to subtly flex his freakish preparedness. you run into some specific ass problems in any vacation environment, but with the hectic energy of big cities, there’s even MORE. and you better believe this motherfucker has it ALL on him. he packed sunscreen AND hand warmers, either way the weather goes, he’s got bandaids, safety pins, spare change, spare bills, he brought one of those like anti spill thermos things, which is REALLY handy-- did he pack his toothbrush? c’mon, don’t underestimate him. of course he did. toothpaste? …uh. damn...

[a-onceler-sideblog]

I did a presentation on the Onceler for friends

It was at a PowerPoint party where we all chose a topic to write a lecture on and I had promised to tell them about the Onceler several months before.

So It started with me talking about how I promised one of my friends this whole thing a couple months ago

I then talked a bit about how homestuck popularized the askblog format.

This is where I hit the people who don't already know what this presentation is about.

I talk about the change in his character design between the book and 2012. also with how he got split into two separate characters, which immediately caused one of my friends to ask when they kiss lol. I also talk about how people made ask blogs of them and how they would interact despite being the same character.

I said nothing important on this slide I just thought they should see these images

Then talked about the variations of the Onceler and the most popular askblogs. (credits to stringbeanman, windroosje, and Wansura

Instant yelling and applause from the guy who asked if they were going to kiss along with a couple others. I talk about classic oncest and the askblog ships. (credits to hybridkilljoys and I can't find the first one again, please let me know if you can find it)

Then onto camp Weehawken. The same guy from earlier yells out he doesn't like where this is going which I say is very valid. (Credit to Audtreegrace)

Then I talk about Thneedville High... and how a decent amount of people shipped Swag and entre despite entre being a teacher and swag a student. (credit Lenny-the-Leprechaun)

And then about Truffla flu.

(Credit to mute-survivor)

And then deoncelerfication

I can't save the slide as a gif so I need you to imagine a skeleton hitting the griddy and doing Irish step dance

And then I talk about the revival that happened around 2020 and modern Oncelers. They were very fond of Methcook-ler and demanded to see more from their blog all the while screaming breaking bad references.

(Credits to Pen-ler, qtip-ler, Methcook-ler, and me)

The host of the party watched everyone's presentation and graded them and presented our grades as his presentation. I feel I should mention everyone else's grade slide had their name.

Overall it was well received and got alot of laughs.

[maedaex2combo]

Y/N: Self-Insert yourself into the Homestuck Epilogues

—————————————————————

Pairings: Dirk Strider x Reader (Mostly platonic / One sided)

Warnings: Mentions of suicide, Angst, Homestuck Epilogues plot

Word Count: 10.4k

Summary: After not hearing from your best friend Dirk for a while, you decide to go check in on him. For some reason, you feel like this isn't going to be the same feels-jam talk you two normally have. The air is different. Something is happening.

A/N: Okay first off, please know that this story is based directly on the plot of the Homestuck Epilogues. It’s supposed to be right before the Candy/Meat timelines split and take place. I know it’s literally in the title, but just to be safe bc I know how some people feel about it. Secondly, I project a lot to write my fics so the backstory about Y/Ns feelings for Karkat and Dave are very self-indulged. Accidentally became kinda important to the plot. My bad. Thirdly, please forgive me if Dirk seems out of character at all. This is just how I felt he would’ve been before he became like the ultimate Dirk or whatever tf goes on in the epilogues 💀. Anyways. Again, tread lightly if heavy topics like suicide are triggering for you. It gets kind of intense. I just felt like this boy needed some comforting when I was reading all those chapters. OKAY IM DONE NOW. Enjoy!!!

—————————————————————

“DIRK!” your voice shouts pointlessly at the closed metal door in front of you, for the umpteenth time. You’re banging at the door unapologetically, like you have no shame, which you don’t at this point. Not when it came to your best friend, and trying to get him out of his self-inflicted depressive/dissociative episodes. 

This episode in particular had been especially hard to get him out of. Dirk had a habit of shutting his friends out when he got to feeling a certain way, and not even letting them in when they came to check on him in person. He seemed to have a soft spot for certain people, but even they couldn’t always get through to him. You included, as well as Jake, Jane, Roxy, and Dave. But, usually you were more invasive and better at tearing his walls down when he built them up. The amount of times you pried your way into listening to a Jake or self-villainizing related rant from Dirk, WILLINGLY, was impressive at this point. Lets be real, Dirk doesn’t open up about his feelings on the usual. All raw and feels-jam like, like your other friends do. 

In summary though, his little shut-in episodes did little to keep you out of his life.

However, he hasn’t been answering your messages for weeks, actually maybe a month now. You haven’t been good at keeping track at this point. He doesn’t ever ignore everyone for this long, especially you. Now that you’re here, and he’s not answering the door, it’s honestly starting to worry you. What could he be doing??? Is he even home? There’s no way he could be…..

Nah. 

He’s just in there being all dreary right now, you know it.

“DIRK OPEN THE DAMN DOOR OR ILL FIND A WAY IN. YOU KNOW I WILL!” You continue banging on heavy metal. You can hear it echo into the chamber behind it, assumingely empty unless Dirk is a literal fucking dickhead. Which he is. But you give him the benefit of the doubt. Looks like you’ll have to find a way in. 

This is really annoying. More than usual. Of course, you don’t ever mind putting this much effort into Dirk. He’s someone you care about very much, so this type of thing just works like clockwork for you. You have a desire to be there for Dirk in a way you feel he needs someone to be. It’s probably inconvenient for him most times, but you try to ignore that intrusive thought. 

Right now though, this is especially annoying because you’ve been trying to contact Dirk for weeks about your own personal issues. It’s always a back and forth of issue-sharing with you two, as friendships should be. But honestly, your life isn’t super eventful, not as much as Dirks somehow. So, you don’t usually have all that much to rant about. Now, the one time your life feels like it’s going to shit and you REALLY need him, he decides to swan dive straight into a pool of “fuck everyone, especially (y/n)” and dissolve into it like a damn spoonful of salt.

That analogy was awful, you can’t even come up with clever things anymore, your head is so disoriented. You launch up into the air with little to no grace at all, so fast that you forgot about the metal hood hovering over the front of the studio and smash your head right into it. Fucking OW. 

You’re silent for a moment, absorbing the pain like when you stub your toe and you just stand in shock for a minute straight. Then, after a due moment of silence, you let out a loud aggravated groan of pain and annoyance. 

“UUUUAGGHHHHUGHH!!!”

Yeah that’s basically how it would be spelt out, I guess. 

Using all the annoyed force your body can muster, god powers and all, you punch through the orange-tinted window in front of you. Not physically, with your hands, but with a sheer force wave of strength you just pushed out upon throwing your fists out and down in front of you as you yelled out. The window cracks and shatters, the whole action being very anime-like. 

Wow.

That was kinda a lot. Maybe chill out for a second? I mean, you’ve been known to do some pretty crazy and powerful stuff back in your Sburb days, fighting enemies and all. But there was no reason to unleash that on Dirks poor window. You know he’s gonna have to reinstall that now, and it probably won’t be of glass this time.

Nonetheless, you float inside, accidentally cutting yourself on a shard still intact in the window frame. You hiss a little at the cut, but it doesn’t stop you. You’re back to being set on finding Dirk. 

It doesn’t take long to find him, of course. You enter the largest room in his studio down on the first floor, down a long hallway, basically the center of his place. This is where he keeps most of his materials and works. It could basically be a big high-ceiling living room, and you’re pretty sure it was once decorated like one, but now it’s covered in metal, tools, junk, etc. You find him drilling away at whatever’s in front of him, back turned to you. 

You casually float down from the balcony above, most of the frantic anger from earlier out of your system now that you’ve found him. And he’s okay.

“Yo. Did you hear me banging at the door or are you deaf now?” You say, half joking, but also a little genuinely.

He doesn’t look at you when he responds, ever focused on his work. He stops drilling to be able to talk at normal volume, and to switch to another tool. “Of course I did. You’re quite loud, I don’t know if you noticed.” 

You roll your eyes. “Oh, okay. Just wanted to confirm you are as much of an asshole as I assumed you were.” You’re still hovering an inch above the ground as you glide over to face the front of him.

“Oh please, you’ve been very aware of my asshole-ness long before you even met me face to face.” 

You laugh a little at this. It’s true, in a way. Even before you knew this timelines version of Dirk, Dave would always rant to you about his Bro. So you assumed he would be an asshole way before you even really met who you’re looking at right now. 

“You’re right. But how do you know that by ‘assumed’, I meant that in recent tense and not one that dated back to my pre-teen years?” You shoot back.

You know he would usually like your comment, but he doesn’t laugh or react much at all.

You frown, because he’d normally have a witty comeback to a stupid question like that. But the conversation seems to have cut off there, when he doesn’t reply for a while and continues operating. It stays like this for a bit, slightly-uncomfortable silence as you stare down at him and he doesn’t look back. You finally slump down, into a criss-cross sitting position in front of him while he works. You stay this way, the only sound echoing the room being made from the burning metal, and you wait for him to be done with this piece before you nudge into his personal life. It’s the respectful thing to do, you know how serious he is about his mechanic works. Whatever he’s doing is probably of some type of importance.

You watch him carefully use a… a uh…. Damn what is that thing called? That little fire-like tool that’s used for welding? A welder? I don’t know and I can’t be fucked to search the internet for it. You know what I mean. He’s sweating just slightly on his freckle-spotted arms from the heat, and you try not to linger on his mussels for too long as you examine him right now. He’s wearing his wielding mask, unfortunately, so you can’t see his face. The eye part is shaped like his shades, and you can’t imagine how that’s practical at all. What a dork. But not like John Egbert adorable-like dork. Dirks a dork in a cool admirable way. It’s hard to explain. 

Another while goes by like this, shrouded in a more comfortable silence this time. You don’t look at him the entire time you wait, eventually you find yourself staring off into hallway behind him, chin in your hands. 

If you (the reader) haven’t picked it up by now, you obviously have a thing for Dirk. But you try not to acknowledge it most of the time, and you’re pretty sure no one knows about it. It kinda conflicts with your feelings you’ve had for Dave since you met him, and your feelings for Karkat you developed not long after spending time together on the meteor. It’d be weird to like Dave and his bro right? This bro, not his actual timeline bro obviously. Yeah, it’d be strange. You must have a thing for the Striders, you guess. But you try to push it into the back of your mind as often as possible. Dirks just your good friend, he’ll always be a friend to you. You want to be there for him because you care in a PLATONIC way. Of course. Even if you did acknowledge these feelings and act on them, he’d most definitely turn you down for various reasons. You know him too well. This is how the last 7 years have panned out, and it was only a few years ago that you even came to acknowledge your feelings that I just said we’re choosing not to acknowledge. 

Moving on.

“I’m assuming you broke one of my windows to get in. Do I have to go and fix that now?” He says, toneless. You cant even tell if he’s really upset.

“How’d you know?” You ask innocently.

“Aside from it being the most obvious way of breaking in besides picking my lock, which would be impossible. Remember when I said you’re loud?” 

You giggle a little. Yeah you guess theres no way he couldn’t have heard you, even though it was up on the second floor, down the hall. “Okay yeah, I totally busted your window, dude. Sorry about that. It was a mistake honestly, but you kinda deserved it for blatantly ignoring me!” 

“I wasn’t ignoring you, I was just busy.”

“Dirk. Busy with what? You haven’t answered me in like a month.” The conversation suddenly gets pretty confrontational without you meaning to make it so.

“I haven’t? Doesn’t feel like it’s been that long.” 

“Well it has.” You cross your arms, looking up at him “I really needed to talk to you! And I was really worried.” 

“Why would you be worried?” 

You frown at this, again. You’re not exactly sure what you were worried about. There were some specific worries that you wouldn’t say to him out loud, that come with having any friend as depressed as Dirk tends to be. They didn’t have to make sense, but they were always at the back of your mind.

“I don’t know. I just worry when you don’t answer for a while. You’ve never gone that long without texting me or calling me back.”

At this very real statement, Dirk doesn’t respond. He probably doesn’t know how to at first. Then, he pulls off his helmet, revealing his pretty face to you once again. You almost let out a sigh of relief. You just really love to look at this guy. His shades are on still, having worn them under the mask like a DORK. 

“Well, I’m totally fine so there’s nothing to worry about. Okay?” This is his best attempt at comforting you right now. You’re still not impressed. 

“I can see that now. But it would’ve been nice to know like a week or two ago.” You would look away to reinforce that you’re upset, but you can’t stop looking at him, while he’s assumingely making eye contact with you behind his shades. You’re trying your hardest to push back thoughts again.

He finally looks away and pushes himself up to stand, walking over to the pile of metal on the couch. “Hey don’t go getting all sentimental with me now. Starting to sound like Jake.” His voice feels off from how he normally talks, like he’s hollowly trying to say something he thinks he would say. “He’s actually been breathing down my neck all week, I’ve thought about blocking him at this point.”

You roll your eyes x2 combo. That last sentence definitely sounded like him, it’s one you’ve heard a million times. He never does it. This is good though, you can segway this into getting him to open up. 

“Jake, huh? You’re still talking to him? Didn’t you say you’d cut him off like- a million cut-offs ago?” 

“Yeah.” He picks the piece of metal up off the couch, knocking a few pieces next to it over onto the floor. “But I could never actually cut him off completely, you know that. With all the arrangements we have and whatever. I just meant for a little while so maybe I could get a fucking second to breathe.”

You nod. Fair enough, you guess. You still think it’s funny how much the tables have turned with them. Since Dirk used to tell you how he was the clingy one back when Sburb was still active. “How come he’s still bothering you so much? I thought he had gotten pretty distant from you in an attempt to get over you or something?” 

“I mean yeah he was like that, but lately our show’s been getting even more popular. Plus, with Jane’s upcoming announcement about the presidency, I’ve been trying to add more elements to amp up his popularity.”

You didn’t even think you could make Jake anymore popular than he already was on earth C, and you already knew of Janes presidency plan thing. Dirk told you a while ago, and you’ve tried so. SO hard not to tell Dave and Karkat yet, per Dirks request. “So why does this make him bother you more?”

“I made him pretty ambitious about the new season. He’s got all these ideas and plans he’s been shooting at me. Haven’t been responding obviously, which makes him bug me more.”

“Yeah, well, that’s what happens when you don’t talk to your friends for long periods of time, Dirk. The messages start to pile up. I wouldn’t call that ‘bugging’. He’s probably been messaging you a normal amount, and you’re just behind on responding.” 

“No no, you’re not friends with Jake like I am. Trust me. He has been giving an absolute fucking earful to me in text. Assuming there was an ear actually listening, and a mouth replying.”

“You’re not even reading the messages?”

“No.”

“What if it’s important?”

“I would know if it was anything that important, trust me.”

You sigh and lean back on your hands. Your arm stings a little and you suddenly remember the cut on your shoulder that you never tended to. Dirk didn’t even notice. Something inside you feels disappointed for some reason. “You’re really full of yourself, yknow that?”

“Yeah, I know.” His response is quick, without hesitation. You know he does. He self-loathes about it at least once every time you guys talk.

“I just wish you’d at least shoot me a text before you disappear for weeks being like ‘Hey! just so you know, I’m about to fuck off to not exist for a while! Don’t worry im not dead or anything!’”

“I’ll make sure to do that next time.” He says sarcastically, coming back over to where he was sitting to add the new piece of metal to his project. 

You groan, it almost feels like a growl. That makes you think about Jade. You groan again. “Can you just tell me what’s going on? This obviously isn’t like your other episodes which don’t really happen for more than maybe like a week at a time.” 

“We’re calling them ‘episodes’ now?” He asks, looking over at you, but still keeping his hands busy. You swear you can see him smirk a little. 

“Well, that’s what I call them. Sorry. That’s probably rude, I just don’t know how else to describe when you get like this.”

“Like what?”

“Reclusive? Distant? I’m assuming you haven’t been in contact with anyone this whole time.” 

“Yeah, I guess. It’s not a big deal though, you guys all have lives to be living, I don’t have to be out there all the time.”

“Out there? Dirk, sometimes I just want to talk to my friend. You can stay all shut in your studio, but the least you could do is answer me via text???” 

He’s back at work, mask down, attention to his project now. But you weren’t done yet.

“Dirk.”

He doesn’t answer. He’s avoiding the conversation so you don’t investigate further. Again, this is clockwork. 

“Dirk.” You insist again, standing up now. 

The cut on your shoulder is bleeding down the side of your arm now. “Can you please just tell me what’s wrong this time. Even if there’s nothing going on, you know that just talking it out DOES actually make you feel better. And I LIKE listening to you talk.”

He flinches a little at this, stoping his wielding for a second, but not any longer. He goes back to ignoring you.

You sigh. This is probably going to take a while. You start to walk down the hall towards the bathroom to find a bandaid and clean up the blood. 

When you’re far enough away, Dirk looks back in your direction, thinking that maybe you were leaving. A twinge of guilt flickers quickly in him, but he ignores it again and turns back to his project.

When you come back, you feel a bit refreshed. You had time to clear your head slightly. You decided that if he’s going to ignore you, you’re just going to wait until he HAS to talk to you. He can’t let it be silent forever, and you’re not leaving until he gets something out. Not like you’ve got anything better to do.

You move past him silently and over to what you’re pretty sure is a nice recliner chair, under all the cloth and metal. You start taking the metal off and placing it aside. This catches his attention, and he almost asks what the hell you’re doing, until he realizes what the hell you’re doing, and decides it’s not worth starting up a conversation again. 

Once all the metals shards are off the chair, you dust it off with your hands and take a seat. You just stare at him for a bit. When that soon gets boring, you lean back into the chair with a sigh, closing your eyes. Maybe you’ll take a nap.

It’s silent (aside from the wielding) for so long that you really do start falling into sleep. The sounds of him working were lulling you into relaxation for some odd reason. You can feel your consciousness just about to be pulled from under you when-

“So… what was it you needed to talk to me about?” Dirk asks from across the room. You hadn’t noticed he stopped working for a bit. The sound of his voice snapped your eyes open for a moment, but when you see he’s not even looking at you, you go right back to closing them.

“I just needed to rant about some stuff, maybe get some advice. But I don’t really think I should be having that conversation with you right now. It seems like you probably got your own stuff to sort out.” 

Dirk shrugs, but you can’t see anyways. “Not really. I mean, kind of. But you came here to see me, you might as well tell me instead of leaving this awkward silence while I work.” 

“I didn’t think it was awkward. But I didn’t come here to rant to you, I came here because I was worried.”

“Okay, sure, whatever. But you might as well tell me now that you’re here. I don’t mind.” 

You sigh. Should you really start this conversation? Would it be selfish to dump all your bullshit on your friend when he’s clearly going through it, even though he won’t talk about it? But he is asking for it at this point. You didn’t even bring it up. 

“Well?” He’s looking over at you when you open your eyes again. How long has he been looking?

You sigh again. “Alright… I’ll try not to drag it out too much.”

“Are you sure you’re capable of that type of self control?” He asks sarcastically.

“Oh, shut up.” you say, but you’re smiling. This man and his smartass. “Alright, well-“ 

And your rant begins. I’ll explain what the rant is about because I don’t want to have to type ours and dirks every action out throughout the whole length of this long conversation. You can just assume he’s listening intently, because he is, for the most part.

Overall, life on Earth C hasn’t really been all that great for anyone as of lately, that’s a given. It’s perfect here, sure, but perfect can only be perfect for so long, before it gets extremely boring. This is amplified x1000000 when you add in the fact that most of you are immortal. Forever is a long long time. However, on a more personal level, there’s a lot going on.

First of all, you’ve lived with Dave and Karkat since you got here. The three of you were best buddies on the meteor together, and decided to stick together after, even despite plenty of money to get your own places. You feel you kind of dug yourself into a hole with this one. Because while living with your best friends is so fun, you’re also not an idiot. You and everyone else on the planet can see the thing Karkat and Dave have for each other. And the fact that you have a crush on both of them, makes this not only awkward, but also painful. This whole situation isn’t new though. In fact, Dirks heard an earful about it for several years. The first year or so of living with them was great, then it backfired. You took it upon yourself to go on a lot of trips, some with Jade and Jake, some alone. You started getting into pottery and went around selling pieces, random art experiments. You tried to convince your two antisocial roomates to go sometimes, but you’re kinda glad they didn’t. You probably needed the distance. Eventually you moved out, only about a little over a year ago. You felt almost guilty, like your presence was keeping the two of them from being together (That definitely wasn’t it though, as Dirk reassures you. They’re both just dense and stubborn.) 

For the past year you’ve struggled with separation issues. Everyone knows you always liked to be with someone all the time. Though your trips alone were freeing and refreshing, you enjoyed the feeling of coming home to someone, or two someones. It hurt, spending the nights in your big empty home, lovely as it was. You had people over plenty, but it was always the nighttime when everyone left that got to you. You developed insomnia, dark circles under your eyes that won’t go away. This isn’t really new news either, but newer than the last. 

The CURRENT issue at hand, now that we have background story, is where Jade comes into the mix. Jade is a lovely girl, and you love her to death. The two of you hang out on many occasions, though you may not be as close with her as with others. You enjoyed her energy and attitude, it was contagious. But lately, she’s been… putting herself very closely into Dave and Karkats lives. Not that she wasn’t already around them a lot, she definitely was over pretty often. But it seems like ever since you left, she’s been there basically 24/7, like she lives there now. Not only that, but the boys have told you how she’s been making uncomfortable advances towards them, and isn’t hiding how she would like to be with the both of them seriously. Now… it’s not necessarily that you’re jealous. (Dirk gets a kick out at this. And by a kick I mean letting out a snort and ALMOST breaking into a chuckle, to your momentary annoyance.) But it’s especially frustrating for many reasons. Putting aside the obvious reason that you have the same feelings for them as she does. She’s basically ruining everything you gave up to try and help DaveKat happen. You moved yourself out of the equation to make room for maybe some progress, and she moved right in after you. They both love Jade as a friend, but you can tell that her advances make them uneasy just from the couple times you’ve witnessed it. You’re afraid she’ll ruin it for them. 

“So, you’re definitely not jealous?” Dirk asks, obviously being sarcastic. 

“Of course I am. I won’t deny it. I’m just saying it’s not the ONLY reason I’m upset about it.” You respond defensively.

“Okay. I mean, that makes sense. But I think you’re mostly just upset with yourself.”

You’re open your mouth to retort, but you stay quiet for a moment. “…You think?”

“Yeah. To me, it sounds like you’re mad at yourself because leaving them caused you to self sabotage into a life you’re not satisfied with. And now Jade is over there going after what she wants and you’re upset you couldn’t bring yourself to do the same.”

You’re a little offended by the accuracy of his blunt words. There are some things you need to defend though. “Okay well, maybe you’re somewhat right-“

“Somewhat?”

“-BUT, I only didn’t go for it because I knew they didn’t feel the same, and I didn’t wanna ruin our friendship. Or worse, their relationship.”

“How do you know they didn’t feel the same?”

……

How did you know?

“Well… I just thought it was pretty obvious. They just don’t act with me how they act with each other. You can just like… feel the different energy, I guess.” 

“But how would you know for sure if you never even went for it?”

Silence again. 

“…I don’t know…” you shuffle awkwardly in the chair, looking down at your lap and playing with your hands. “…So you think I should’ve done what Jade is doing?”

“Oh, definitely not.” He responds almost immediately. “She’s definitely gonna fuck their shit up.”

Your head shoots up at this, shocked. “WHAT?! But you were just saying that I should have gone for it!”

“Yes. But honestly I think you would have gone about it in a less uncomfortable way. And even if they did turn you down, or like- weirdly wiggle out of the situation like they do. Then at least you’d have a straight answer. But you didn’t ever bother trying at all.”

“I-“

“-AND furthermore, I think that if you had gotten a straight answer, it would’ve given you the closure you need, and you wouldn’t have to keep trying like Jade seems to be set on doing.”

It hits you now. You don’t know why you’ve never thought about it like this. You always just assumed their feelings. Even if you had confessed to them one time, you could’ve gotten that closure you didn’t realize you needed. Now it’s too late. They’ve already got too much tension on their relationship, adding you in the mix would be chaos. This is suddenly very troubling, you’re starting to get into a depressed state of mind again. The one you’ve been stuck in for weeks, as well as Dirk probably has for reasons still unknown. 

“I….” You relax your hands in your lap, and lean back to look up at the ceiling. “You’re right. I should have at least tried.”

“Didn’t I tell you to a ton of times before? I always thought that a sincere heartfelt confession from you might actually help push their relationship forward, even if they didn’t reciprocate.” 

“Yeah… I just never wanted to. I was so sure they’d be repulsed at the idea.”

“Ouch. Repulsed? That’s a new word for the situation.”

“Yeah, I guess I always felt like that deep down though. I mean, Karkats super harsh and distant. And Dave’s super aloof and distant. So, being vulnerable about your feelings for them just feels… extra vulnerable.”

“Yeah. It definitely wouldn’t be an easy relationship to navigate. Honestly maybe you did yourself a favor.”

You sigh at this. It certainly doesn’t feel that way. 

It goes silent again for a little bit, but this time neither of you find any discomfort in it. Dirks been working still, but doing something more quiet now. Connecting wires or something probably. You’re not really sure what it is he does. 

You remember something he said to you several sentences ago.

“Also… earlier you said… that I caused a life that I’m unhappy with…” you speak, sounding more dejected that you have today.

“Mhm.”

“Well. I don’t think that’s true.”

“No?”

“No, not really. I mean, yeah it definitely caused me some additional problems, sure. But Dirk…” you look down to make eye contact with him. He stops to look back at you, from behind the shades. He’s resting his arms on his knees, face stoic, fully listening. 

“I don’t think… I’ve been happy with my life.. in a long time.”

The sentence hits Dirk harder than maybe it should’ve normally, almost as if breaking something down. His face finally changes, from just being a stone-cold expression, to a slight frown, his features relaxed. It’s not an expression of pity, really. He’s sympathizing. 

Most everyone of the sburb kids probably feel this way. Things are just not as great as you might have though they’d be at the beginning of starting an entirely new universe. There’s just this terrible lingering empty feeling, that no one really talks about out loud. But it feels different hearing it from you. You always tried to be a little optimistic. You’ve been unhappy many times, that’s just normal human emotions. But you’ve never expressed being unhappy… with your life as a whole? Or accidentally admitted that you’re also depressed. 

The confession hits you hard as well for some reason, even though you’ve known it as a fact for quite some time. You’ve never outwardly admitted it. Suddenly you’re feeling warm wet tears run down the sides of your cheeks. They surprise you. When did you start tearing up?

Now they won’t stop, despite your frantic hands that try to wipe each one away. 

“Sorry… I… didn’t meant to get so emotional all of a sudden! Haha..” you’re sniffling a bit between your words, and trying to force a smile to make things less serious. Dirk just stares at you as you try to pull yourself together. “I just can’t help.. but think like… wow! I’m really going to live… potentially forever… and I’m not even enjoying the beginning… what’s 50 years from now gonna feel like? What’s 500 years gonna feel like? Will I even be me anymore at that point?” You’re just rambling now. You’ve went so quick from a normal rant-sesh to such a wet sloppy mess (ew). You’re no doubt embarrassed, and trying to talk in a casual manner that will maybe make you forget that you’re sobbing in front of your cool best friend or maybe crush, while he stares at you uncomfortably. Why did you even think coming here was a good idea? You’re in no place to help him. You just needed him to help you. You are selfish.

“Im- Im sorry, I’ll stop.. just give me a sec-“ you’re cut off suddenly. A distantly familiar feeling. You’re quick to go from feeling alone and pathetic, to warm and secure, as you’re pulled into an embrace with Dirk Strider. These hugs are not something you get to feel often. You didn’t even hear him walk over. 

You’re pulled out of your intrusive thoughts immediately. You feel safe, and comforted. In a way only he’s ever been able to make you feel. Despite all the bickering, and smart ass comments, you really loved Dirk. He always knew how to talk to you and handle you, with just enough care, even though sometimes you craved more. (Give a dog a bone, right?) But not because of the hug alone, no. It’s what’s about to come after this. This is it. The clock is moving, it’s in motion.

He pulls back only after he’s felt you settle down and go quiet. “I know how you feel. You’re not alone, you know that.” 

You nod, too flustered to look him in the face, so you look to the side, staring at his funny little shoulder tattoo. “I feel guilty about it though. Earth C is so perfect. I should be really happy, shouldn’t I?” 

“Nah. Nothing is ever perfect. Even though we literally created Earth C, I wouldn’t call it perfect. In fact, we’re probably about to get so fucking far from it.” 

You look at him and tilt your head. “What do you mean?” 

He pulls back again, standing up, turning to grab a chair sitting in the corner of the room. He carries it back over and sets it down in front of you, your eyes follow him the whole time. He sits on it the opposite way you’re supposed to, legs around the back of the chair, resting his arms on the top. The way a cool guy sits. You look at him, attentive. Ready for him to lay it on you. 

“I just seriously doubt that anything that’s about to happen will turn out very good. Our years for living a ‘normal’ life are already pretty much past at this point.” 

Okay, now you’re really confused. “Dirk you’re not making any sense. What’s going to happen that’s so bad?” 

He looks at you for a moment. He definitely isn’t intending on sharing with you any information of any importance, but you don’t know that. 

“I don’t know yet. John has to make a decision first.” He says nonchalantly, looking more stoic than usual.

You don’t respond, waiting for something else. But that’s it.

You can’t help it, you start laughing. What could that possibly mean?

“John makes a decision?? That’s it? What’s the choice? To nuke or not to nuke the planet??” You’re still giggling at this thought, though kinda morbid. 

Dirk isn’t laughing. “Ha ha. No, it’s nothing like that. It’s hard to explain. But the jist of what I was saying before, is it’s just that none of us are really meant to live a normal life on Earth C. Think about it. A bunch of immortal gods, of totally different upbringings and outlooks, and even species, all living on one little planet. We’re bound to fuck shit up one day.”

You’ve stopped laughing now and take a second to think about this. You’ve never really considered it. “Yeah… I guess now that you say it, that sounds kinda bad. We could’ve done with a few more planets in the system honestly.” 

“No, it’s not about the number of planets. Even if we all had our own planets, we’d end up going to war and shit with each other one day. We’re just not meant to lead normal lives.”

You frown at this. Why would friends go to war with each other? Granted, not everyone was super close, but we all fought to make this universe, why would we tear it apart? 

“I think you’re oversimplifying it. Not all of us want to be dictators.” You roll your eyes and cross your arms. You definitely aren’t happy about Janes plans, Dirk knows this.

“You subtly talking about why you don’t like Jane and the way she wants to lead just proves my point. And anyways, It doesn’t matter. We don’t have a choice in what we are. And what we are, is gods. We’ll have to ascend one day.” You search for a hint of irony in Dirks face, but he’s dead serious. Wow.

“Ascend??? Dirk what the hell are you talking about?”

It’s quiet for a moment. Dirk catches himself about to tell you too much about what has been fucking his brain for months, or more like years at this point. You can tell his silence is a troubled one. 

You reach out a concerned hand to place on his arm. He flinches a little. “Dirk… please tell me what’s going on. What are you talking about?” 

He can’t look at you. His head stays in place, but he’s avoiding eye contact even though you can’t tell. There’s a lot of thoughts going through his mind right now. Not all of them are about his ultimate self that is inevitably going to take over one day. Some are about you. And about the outcome of this timeline. For a moment he feels sympathy for all his friends. But there’s not much else I can tell you about what he’s thinking. Not now.

“I just… don’t know how much time I have left.” He says, still having not moved, but his eyes watch the clock behind you.

“How much… What? Dirk… Are you sick or something?” You are rapidly trying to understand his cryptic way of explaining to you, but it seems you’re falling short. 

“Not physically.” He pauses and actually lets out a slight chuckle, putting his gloved hand on his mouth. You bask in his slight-laugh, he’s really so charming. More than he could know. “God that sounded so emo.” 

“Dude, I don’t sound any better. We’re both being emo, it’s fine.” You smile back at him, removing your hand from his arm. You feel a bit of tension leave your body that you didn’t notice was there, the sound of his laugh ever like a cure to your stress. 

He nods. There’s just so much he can’t tell you, you wouldn’t be able to understand. And he didn’t want you to either. He didn’t want to put that burden on you. There was only one person he could give that burden to, and he still wasn’t sure when he’d have to tell her. 

But there were some feelings he knew he could vaguely talk to you about.

“But no, I’m fine physically. It’s just… I don’t know. I guess I’ve been having the same thoughts you have. How long can this all really last? Who will I be hundreds of years from now? What if I don’t even recognize myself anymore?” He pauses for a moment, and you watch him frown as he thinks of something. “I definitely won’t.”

You don’t dare interrupt. You just sit and listen, attentive, the best you can. When Dirk starts opening up, you hardly say a word until he’s finished. 

He goes on about how he’s been feeling especially useless and exhausted lately. Talking vaguely about his potential and his purpose, and that right now just felt like a stagnant period while he waits. But what if he doesn’t want to have some greater purpose, or some ultimate potential destiny? He’s always just wanted to be able to live a happy, normal life with his friends. He didn’t get to grow up with other people and have relationships. Getting here to figure out that he really never would get that normalcy, sucked the hope out of him. At least, maybe he could’ve got a while if he had made the most of the last seven years. He can’t even say they flew by, they dragged by painfully. He says he’s always just felt like he’s been watching his friends live through a window, communicating behind the glass, but not actively joining them. 

You soak in every word like you’ll need to know it for a test. You nod every now and then, and quietly “mhm”, to show you’re listening. You can feel he’s still not done yet. 

“I mean honestly (y/n), what’s even the point of it all? You feel it too right? There’s no way we’re headed toward a future that’ll be of any real purpose.”

You decide to finally speak up since he addressed you. “Are you saying we’re in a doomed timeline?” You ask, enabling him to explain more.

“No, it’s nothing like that. I’m not even sure doomed timelines are possible anymore, they’re just… timelines. But we’re definitely not going to be living happily ever fucking after.” 

You’re giving him that sympathetic look now, but he reads it as pity. His head reflectively looks away. He’s starting to get aggravated. “I don’t know how much longer I can hold out. I don’t even want to go through with this anymore. I just wish it’d all end.” 

Woah. You’re eyes widen a little at what he’s implying. “Dirk… don’t say that-“ 

“What’s even shittier about this whole thing is the fact that even if I really wanted to end it, I couldn’t. None of us could. Except maybe the trolls. We have to wait for something just or heroic to happen and decide our fate for us. We’re stuck to live in some shithole timeline with no way out. I have no choice. I either subject to being a depressed shut-in, or leave my humanity behind to pursue something above this existence. How pathetic is that?” 

You’re not sure exactly what he’s going on about, but your instinct immediately is to comfort him. You take his hand. He doesn’t flinch this time, but he doesn’t look at you either. 

“Hey, just calm down for a second, okay? I promise you it doesn’t have to be like that… I don’t know what’s due for this timeline, and I’m not sure if you do… If Rose told your something or.. I don’t know. But I always know that whatever life throws at me I’ll…” you hesitate to say the rest of the sentence. It’s a little cheesy, it almost makes you cringe for a second. But then he looks at you, clearly anticipating the rest of your sentence. You push through. “I’ll know I’ll be able to get through it, because you’ll be here.” 

He’s doesn’t say anything, but his eyes are wider now. He has no idea what to say at this intimate sentence. The two of you have been close for a while now, but you never really express it verbally. You just enjoyed each other without having to say it usually. The lack of response eats at you, you have to say something else since he clearly can’t think of what to say to that. You let go of his hand too, thinking maybe it’s making him uncomfortable. 

But he watches your hand as you pull it away. 

“And I’ll always be here for you! I’ll always be here to help you. I mean… if you ‘left’ in whatever way that means I’d…” You play with your hands again, the both of you staring at them, thumbs in a tug of war. “Just… please don’t leave, okay?” 

You both look up at the same time to make eye contact, but it’s obviously more intense for him. He can’t promise you that. He’s told you he won’t already, but you refuse to understand him.  

You’re both quiet, and you anxiously bite your lip again at his lack of a reply. Why isn’t he agreeing? 

“(Y/n)… have you ever thought about trying to take your own life? Just to see what happens?” The sudden dark inquiry sends your heart into your stomach. Why is he saying this? Your face looks terrified, but he doesn’t say anything, still looking. 

“Dirk.. W-what are you say-“

“Have you?”

You swallow hard. This is something you REALLY don’t like to talk or think about. It’s something you’ve never spoken to anyone about. 

But the answer is yes. Of course. You think about it a lot recently. It started when you started living alone. Those restless nights, wondering what the meaning of it all was. You wondered if maybe the clock of justice would consider the theft of your own lifespan a worthy enough cause. Why would a godtier with no will to live be worthy of such a title? It wouldn’t even makes sense, like more of a punishment than a reward. In a sense, you killed yourself to get this title. Why couldn’t you do the same to remove it? 

Maybe you could. 

You’ve been quiet a suspicious amount of time now. It tells Dirk his answer, but he still waits for you to admit it. His social cues are still really not the best sometimes, even after getting used to social interaction. You’re clearly uncomfortable.

You’re looking at your lap again, but your hands are still. You’re too deep in traumatic thought to even want to move. “…Of course I have.” Is all you say after a while.

“Have you tried?” 

His question sounds genuine. Actually curious. 

“No. I wouldn’t dare. What if…”

“It worked?”

“…Yeah…” 

“Then it’d finally be over.” 

When you look up, he’s still staring at you. You’re still scared, your heart breaking more with every word he says, but he seems calm now. As if he’s decided something in his mind. The more the clock ticks, the more anxious you get. What is he thinking?

You’re just about to speak up again, try to say something to calm the conversation, or just to change it to something less triggering. But he suddenly stands up. You look up at him, face getting more worried. 

“Dirk?”

He’s not looking at you anymore. And without a word, he turns around and begins to walk away. 

“Dirk?? Where are you going?!” You automatically stand up when he just continues to get farther away, turning to go down the hallway.

You follow him, quickly.

“Hey! Wait! You can’t just leave the conversation like that!”

You watch him turn into the bathroom, and shut the door before you can get to it. You jiggle the doorknob, but of course it’s locked. You’re panicking a bit now. This panic causes you to bang on the door without thinking, feeling a bit helpless. 

“Dirk!!! What are you doing in there?! Please just wait a se-“

“Relax.” You hear him calmly through the door. You silence immediately hearing his voice. “I’m just using the bathroom.” 

Your face automatically turns a slight pink. All of the panic and anxiety turns into embarrassment in the blink of an eye. You must’ve been overreacting. You do that sometimes. 

“O-oh….. Okay. Sorry… I’ll leave you alone then.” You’re cursing yourself in your mind as you start making your way back down the hall. 

Halfway through though, you stop suddenly. Taking a second to think about what just happened, to see if you were really overreacting. You come to the conclusion that you definitely weren’t, now that the embarrassment has subsided. Why would he just suddenly lock himself in the bathroom after your intense discussion about suicide? That is definitely concerning! 

You feel better having justified yourself. You then come to the rational decision that you’d give him 5 minutes and then check on him. Hopefully you’re jumping to conclusions, and he’s just really bad at ending conversations like usual. You take a direct turn into the kitchen that was right next to you. You flip the light switch on and take a seat at the table. What an exhausting conversation you just had. That was not how you were expecting that to go at all.

You look around. The kitchen isn’t excused from having a bunch of junk in it. There’s spare parts and random doodads laying all over the place. Wow, did you just think the word “doodad”? Who are you, Jake? Sometimes being here alone with him made you feel like it. Like Jakes replacement.

You decide you’re just gonna tuck that repressed thought back deep into your brain. That’s not even possible, you and Dirk aren’t even… I mean he would never… Wait didn’t he just tell you earlier that you shouldn’t assum…. OKAY THATS ENOUGH. 

The clock ticks by with the speed of a damn snail. You’re just sitting there watching it. You don’t even have the energy to check your phone to distract yourself. One minute has gone by and you’re waiting on the second. You’re also listening intently for any concerning noises, but you’re pretty sure the walls in this place are very thick. You couldn’t hear him drilling or anything from outside earlier, and the hallway isn’t that long.

You’re staring at a piece of hair in your face, blowing it up and watching it fall back down, passing the time. Three minutes now. Your stomach grumbles, and you decide to check Dirks fridge for inventory. When you open it up, it’s literally just like 10 half gallons of milk(?). This is clearly equisprites doing, but what has Dirk been eating??? Does he ever go out for food? Does he alchemize it? Who knows. You sigh and sit back down. 

Just as you’re counting down the last minute, you hear the bathroom door open and you look over to the doorway. After a few steps Dirks frame passes right by without glancing at you, even though it was obvious you were in there with the light being on. You sigh x2 combo and stand up from the table, walking out and back into the hallway to follow him. 

He’s sitting back on his bench in the living room, working again. You watch him, about 6 feet away. You don’t even know what to say, and you take your time trying to think of something. 

“Are you… okay?” Is all you could come up with. 

There’s no response. You can see he’s assembling his drill with a different top. He’s gonna drown you out. 

“Dirk. It’s alright if you don’t wanna talk about it anymore. You can just-“ the drilling starts “-… say that.”

You look dejected. It’s a sad scene honestly, if you could see it like I am in my mind right now, and I hope you are. 

He’s never been this distant before, especially not after opening up so deeply like that. His feelings were like a one way ticket each time, once you’re in, you’re in. But he’s forced you out after already letting you in. It didn’t make any sense. You look at the clock on the wall. It stopped working. When did that happen? 

“Is there anything I can do to get you to talk to me?” You ask as a last resort.

Unsurprisingly, no answer. You give up. Quite frankly, that whole conversation tired you out too, emotionally. If he doesn’t wanna talk about it anymore, that’s fine by you. 

“Do you mind if I stay over at least? Is the guest room still open?” You ask, expecting an answer, since it’s unrelated.

However, still no answer. You don’t know why you thought you’d get one that time. You decide to just take his silence as a yes. You’ve stayed over his house plenty of times before. A lot of the time when you guys would hang out, you’d talk or do something into late hours of the night, and not realize how late it’d gotten. The guest room might as well be yours at this point, since you’re pretty sure no one else ever stays over. Other than Jake, but he’ll just sleep in Dirks room. Obviously. And Dave has his own room here for some reason. 

You take yourself up the stairs, and you gaze at him for a minute from the rail before you make your way to the room. This whole day has made you sadder than you already were, you think.

When you’re in the room, you don’t even take in the interior. You’ve seen it a million times. It’s just a bunch of subtle weeb decor. Annoyingly aesthetic. You faceplant onto the bed and kick your shoes off. It’s not even that late, but you’re so exhausted from that interaction and from not getting much sleep the night before. Insomnias been hitting you hard lately since you didn’t have Dirk. It’s been especially lonely. Somehow being in Dirks house lulls you right to sleep immediately.

You sleep like a baby. A full 8 hours, something you haven’t had in a while. When your eyes flutter open it’s pitch black, only the light of the bedside clock glaring at you. 2:00am. Wow, it’s early. Or late, you guess?

You don’t know what to do since you feel so awake now. You could probably sleep a little more? You decide you wouldn’t mind some milk right now before you go back to bed. Assuming the white fridge liquid is milk. You’ll take your chances.

You make your way down the stairs, and as you’re descending you start to remember todays conversation. You cringe a bit. The whole thing was so emo and embarrassing on both of your parts. You’re pretty sure you made him uncomfortable towards the end and that’s probably what scared him-

Suddenly your thoughts are cut off. You hear… A voice. Dirk? It was only quick, but you see a small light from the hallway leading to the kitchen. You follow it quietly, curious. 

When you see him, you freeze at the sight.

He’s leaning over the kitchen sink, head hanging. He’s facing away from you, and you’re kind of hiding in the doorway anyways. The ambiance is coming from a small nightlight over the counter. You wish you could see his face. You hear a quick sniffle.

You’re deciding whether to say something or walk away. It seems like he’d want to be alone right now. Or does he need someone more than ever? He’s been so hard to read. You always think you interfere too much with him, but you can’t help it. Then, you hear him let out a small, quick sob. Probably the source of what you heard earlier. He sounds like he’s trying to hold it in, even though there’s no one around from his perspective. Your heart breaks. You have basically no control over what you do next. 

Suddenly, Dirk feels a pair of arms wrap around his abdomen, a warm body leaning into his back, embracing him. He jumps slightly at first, but relaxes into it after a minute. He’s silent now. No sniffling, no sobs. 

“I’m sorry.” Is all you say once you feel him relax. 

It’s silent again. All you can hear is the clock behind you. 

“You don’t have to respond, I just can’t stand to-“ 

“I tried it.” He says, cutting you off. He sounds defeated.

Your eyes widen a little. “You tried…”

“To kill myself. Earlier.” He states way too bluntly.

Your heart sinks. “Oh…” 

Silence. 

“It didn’t work.”

“Well, I can see that.” 

“Because I couldn’t actually do it.”

You pause for a moment.

“Huh?”

“I couldn’t really go through with it a hundred percent… I have to see this timeline through. It’s my burden to bear.” He grits his teeth and grips the sink. You feel his tensing.

“I’m sorry, Dirk.” It’s all you can think of to say. You don’t want to bother asking him to clarify anymore. You have no idea what he’s going through or what to suggest. This is all you know. You hold him tighter, and nuzzle a little bit more into his back.

He relaxes again, to your surprise. And he lets go of the sink with one hand to place it on your arm. You can’t see his face right now, and you wish you could. The two of you stay like that a little longer. After a minute or two you can feel him crying again. 

You’re sure it’s hard for him. Not just what he’s going though, but being vulnerable about it. 

Suddenly, you feel yourself start to tear up too. The two of you share a cry almost silently, not having to see each other in this emotional state, but still holding on and having someone there. 

“I promise it’ll be okay.” You say, breaking the silence. “Whatever you’re going through, we’ll go through it together. I’m a god tier too. I promise I’ll be here for you.”

It honestly feels like this made him cry a little harder as you feel him shake a little more. 

He raises his hands up to his face to wipe away any evidence of emotion under his shades. Then, to your surprise again, he breaks out of your embrace, only to turn around and embrace you again straight on.

You’re surprised for a moment, but when it settles in, you hug him back with all you have. And maybe it’s just you, but no hug between you two has ever felt this… passionate?

“Sorry I’m being like this. It’s just been hard. I’ve never been this emotional about it, even though I’ve known it for so long. I think it’s because it’s getting closer. And because you’re here. Probably why I’ve also been ignoring everyone.” He confesses. “So there’s your answer. I just didn’t want you to see me like this. I’m sorry, again.”

Again, you have no idea exactly what he’s talking about, and you make a mental note to maybe ask about it again another time when you’re both more stable. But you’re just committed to comforting him to your best ability right now.

“You don’t have to apologize, Dirk. You can tell me anything, seriously. I’m sorry there’s nothing I can do to help you. I wish I could.”

You feel him sigh slightly, but it seems more like relief than frustration or anything negative. 

“You should really get some sleep. Have you been up this whole time?” You say, changing the subject in concern for his wellbeing. You wonder what his nights have been like all this time you haven’t been talking. 

“Yeah. But I’m fine. I don’t really have a sleep schedule anymore.”

“Well, looks like we’re starting now then. Cmon.”

He doesn’t complain or object when you pull back and take his hand to walk out into the hallway. The two of you make your way upstairs and into Dirks room. He doesn’t say anything, and you couldn’t possibly know what he’s thinking right now. About you. 

You stop right after walking in the doorway and let go of his hand.

“Well, goodnight. I’ll see you in the morning, kay?” You say, giving him as much of a genuine smile as you can manage. You start walking past him to leave.

But then his hand grabs yours, stopping you. You freeze for a second, and turn to look at your friend again.

Your eyes widen at the sight when your eyes meet his. He had pulled his shades up to sit on his head, and for the first time you see his eyes, along with the rest of his face. Granted, it’s pretty dark so you can’t see the color well, but you can’t help but think they’re beautiful, just like the rest of him. His face also just reads ‘exhausted’, and tired from all the crying and emotion showed in the last however many hours. The two of you are quiet, staring at each other like this for a moment. 

“Would you… wanna stay?” He says, not breaking eye contact, but still seeming slightly unsure about it? 

“Stay… like, stay over? Yeah.. I-I was just gonna go to the guest r-“

“No. I meant in here.”

You’re blushing now. Good thing it’s dark, you guess. “In… your room?”

“Yeah.”

“In your bed?”

“Mhm.”

He seems much less embarrassed by this than you, of course. You’re extremely flustered now that you’ve made sure he meant what you think he meant. Wait… does that mean he wants to sleep with you or like SLEEP with you??? Oh god-

“Not anything weird. I just mean like, we can sleep in the same bed.” He says, almost like he read your mind. “It just feels like we both kinda need some comfort right now. And it feels weird to have you sleep in a different room after… Yknow everything that just happened. You don’t have to, if you’re not comfortable with it.”

“No!” You say, embarrassingly fast. You clear your throat a bit, not making it any better. He smirks at you slightly, tilting his head. Lord have mercy. “I mean… That actually sounds nice, yeah.”

He smiles in response, and you bask in the sight. Dirk Strider smiling at you, fully exposed so you can see all his beautiful features at once. You’re actually really happy right now. You haven’t felt this happy in a while. Which is kinda ironic after todays conversations. Why does he feel like a cure to your pain every time?

With his hand still holding onto yours, he guides you over to the bed. He puts his shades on the bedside table. When you both lay down and get under the covers, he turns to face you. Your heart is pounding like a million times per second right now as you turn to look back at him.

“You’re blushing pretty hard right now. You okay?” He says, and you can definitely see that slight little shit-eating smirk. He’s really gonna tease you right now. How could he even tell you’re blushing?

“Shut up! I’m fine… You just caught me off guard..” You defend.

“What? Did you think I wanted to have sex?” You would think he’s teasing since he’s still smirking, but it also sounds kind of like a genuine question.

Hearing him say it out loud while looking at you with those intense eyes makes you blush harder, like your face is actively working against you. “NO! Well… I mean I wasn’t sure.” You have to look away for a second. “And sleeping in the same bed just feels intimate in its own way, even without sex.” 

He nods understandingly. “Yeah, you’re right, this is pretty intimate I guess.” It’s silent for a moment then. “…But …I don’t know. It just feels right after everything that happened today.” He looks away now, facing the ceiling. 

This grants you to look back at him. You take in his beauty, the moonlight from the window being the only luminescence to light the scene. Even the curve of his nose looks perfect, making an impressive outline of his side profile. You just can’t stress to yourself enough how you love seeing him like this. You wish you could do it everyday. You’re smiling without realizing it. 

“You can take a picture if you want, it’ll last longer.” He says, glancing at you while keeping his head in place.

You blush again and shove at him lightly. “Fuck you!” You say, but you laugh afterwards. He smiles in response. If only you could stay this way forever. 

You turn to face the ceiling as well. After that, it feels like it’s the end of your conversation, and you both start trying to fall asleep. You’re laying there for so long trying to sleep, you can’t remember how long it’s been. You did get a lot of sleep earlier so it makes sense that it’s a little hard now, plus being in bed with Dirk isn’t helping. Your heart is still kinda racing. 

What happens next almost gives you a heart attack. You feel Dirk snag his arms around your torso, his face leaning into your arm. You’re frozen, and you’re not sure if he’s sleeping or not, so you don’t say anything.

As if he feels your discomfort, he speaks, in a low tone “Sorry. Is this okay?”

“Mhm…” you respond quietly, and carefully move your arm up and put it over him, and he automatically leans into your side now.

Now it’s really hard to sleep, so you just open your eyes. You look down at him and take in the rare and perfect sight of Dirk Strider sleeping. He looks so peaceful. Unbothered, undisturbed by Earth C and all your stupid post-Sburb problems. You wish you could make it all go away for him. 

You start to run your hands though his hair softly, and he hums slightly in response. Still slightly awake, but you can tell he’s on his way out. You smile at how natural this feels now. 

You finally feel yourself start to fall asleep as well. 

“I think I’ll stay here for a while.” You say quietly, but Dirk is already sleeping. And you follow suit with him again as soon as you say that. 

The two of you stay intertwined for the rest of the night. 

END

[yanderes-galore]

Hello!! I'd like to request for homestuck please! Do you have any headcanons for the type of yandere Dirk Strider would be? And how he may treat or act around his darling?

(If you need a time frame at all in the comic timeline, I can suggest post-game (before the epilogues so no worry to know those or hs^2) - it might work out easier to write for!! Otherwise if you don't, disregard this paragraph hehe)

Sure! Sorry it took so long (It's been MONTHS 😥😭), I needed to shove the entirety of Homestuck in my brain and have coherent thoughts about it. I'm actually not entirely done with Act 6 yet (I wanna say halfway through-ish?) so if he's very OOC my bad.... I can make an updated version at a later date maybe? Take this as an AU of Act 6 just in case, I just wanted to explore his yandere type.

Here's what I got! Now that I think about it I want to write more for Homestuck... it's really good and I'm happy I finally experienced it. Thanks Tumblr 💜 I tried to keep this general as the first concept for a character I write typically is :)

Writers who gave me motivation and inspiration to start this work; @yandere--stuck and @bunnyjam-imagines . Your work is incredible and keep doing what you're doing ^^ 💜Your Dirk fics really helped me with this so I dedicate this to you, too. IF YOU DO NOT WISH TO BE TAGGED LET ME KNOW, THANKS.

Possible Spoilers For Homestuck Act 6

Yandere! Dirk Strider Concept

Pairing: Romantic/Platonic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Stalking, Manipulation, Overprotective behavior, Hidden cameras, Secret recording, Dirk struggles expressing feelings, Invasion of privacy, Brief violence mention, Swearing, Kidnapping, Dubious relationship, Isolation, Controlling behavior, Implied jealousy, Angst, I like this version of yandere Dirk where he just feels conflicted.

Dirk is a very interesting character and I've noticed there has been a pattern in the way people write him as a yandere.

Dirk seems like a yandere whose lucid in his behavior.

He has tendencies to know what he's doing is wrong, or at least this is a pattern I've seen in the way others write him.

I can agree with this as Dirk seems like he takes on the role as guardian for the other people in his group at times (Jake, Jane, Roxy).

Dirk would be very caring towards his darling despite the emotional baggage he has behind the scenes.

He most likely met you through a chat client like the rest.

Since he was young he's always had an interest in puppets, robots, and horses...

He could've met you through one of these interests or by one of his other friends introducing you.

Either way, Dirk finds himself talking to you more and more when he adds your handle.

Dirk's yandere behavior isn't overly romantic even when his feelings are that way.

He doesn't really like expressing it all that much.

Dirk's behavior comes off as just him looking out for you.

He's like a guardian who's willing to do anything for those he cares about.

Based on the fact Dirk has made robots for Jake and Jane in the past, usually for special occasions or requests, he probably would make one for you eventually.

Dirk is very skilled with robotics and wouldn't mind creating some sort of bot for you no matter the size or purpose.

Dirk does try to keep one goal constant when making you a robot gift...

It has to protect you.

He's responsible and wants nothing more than those he cares about out of harm's way.

If they reciprocate his feelings or not doesn't matter....

When he does make that robot gift he puts a lot of his time into it.

AR has to spend a lot of time responding to his friends as all of his time is spent multi-tasking on a ton of tasks.

Building your gift... talking to you... watching his dreamself...

He's kind of worn thin.

Once it's finished he sends it to you with a brief message.

It's his way of showing his care even if he seems very closed off with feelings.

This robot is the first camera he manages to sneak in your home.

Dirk even has secret folders on his PC of just footage.

Part of him feels guilty for recording you... but he tries to reassure himself this is what a robotic guardian needs.

The robot is the biggest part leading into his obsession.

It can act on its own to protect you or like a drone he can control and see through.

He feels guilty that he's using it to interact with you like he's actually there....

Dirk's feelings could swap over the more he sneaks electronics into your house and the more he cyberstalks you.

There's a certain threshold he passes when he eventually has to admit he's got feelings for you if he has them.

Clearly he doesn't just want to protect you like a friend, right?

Why else would he watch you sleep with that robot you thought of as a cute gift from him?

He can't help but search through files upon files containing pictures and video feed of you being... you.

He feels he could never admit it fully but he does like you.

One way or another....

Dirk's obsession is very... what's the word... quiet?

He seems like the yandere who would just hover in your shadow... just to keep you out of harm.

He isn't a very violent yandere and is more just like a guardian to you due to his fear of revealing his feelings, which makes him work well as a platonic or romantic yandere.

Dirk probably could use violence to protect you but doesn't always tend to.

His robot guardian he made for you is indeed armed, though.

The robot he gave you isn't as merciful and may even get bloody if it has to for you.

He doesn't mind if you feel the same for him or not... he would like you to but you don't have to....

He seems like the yandere who'd sigh and regret saying anything if you rejected his feelings... but respect the decision somewhat.

That doesn't stop his overbearing behavior.

The comic does say when he puts his heart to something he won't give up until he accomplishes it.

Friend or lover, Dirk tends to act controlling.

Be it him talking to you through your robot, in the chat client, or in person if he ever meets you... Dirk seems to act like he knows more than you.

He has a bit of an ego and can come off as obnoxious in conversation at times.

He always acts like he knows what's best for you.

He looks back on the times he has acted like this with regret later... as I said, lucid yandere.

In fact a lot of his obsession makes Dirk regret it at times.

This could be because he harbors self-hatred for himself already and his obsession over you doesn't help.

He doesn't really want to give you up, though.

Dirk would manipulate you like a puppet at times.

For some reason when others are close to you, he hates it.

They could just be close friends, or potential partners...

He just can't handle it... he feels he has to prevent it or he may just lose the chance to have you.

Sometimes the darkness of his obsession kicks in and he... gives in to acts he shouldn't.

Such as using your robot to invade your privacy...

Maybe even manipulating your friends Jane, Roxy, and even Jake away from you...

That and the countless times he's considered kidnapping you to keep you alone with him just to soothe his aching thoughts.

Dirk seems like he'd struggle a lot with his obsession.

He hates the idea of hurting you.

He knows there's a good chance his obsession will hurt you, which hurts him...

All of this just causes him hurt.

Yet the more he speaks to you about interests and learns more and more about you...

He knows he can't let you go.

There's no doubt Dirk vents the frustrations his feelings cause him to Lil Cal his puppet pal.

Who else is he supposed to tell?

It's not like these feelings, regardless of the intention, are normal?

'Yeah, I stalk my friend through a robot and manipulate their life like some sort of puppet stage. What do I do to make them reciprocate?'

It's batshit and he knows it....

Roxy will just use it as gossip later... she may even tell you with some subtle hint or something.

Jane's a very sweet woman but he just feels... uncomfortable admitting he has such dark feelings about you?

You'd think Jake would be a good fit to talk to, being bros and all, but Dirk decides he'd rather just vent his feelings to himself and keep it like that.

Until he eventually acts....

Soon Dirk is going to just wing it.

It seems like a very Strider thing to do.

Your robotic companion he gifted is going to act against you in the end.

While he once used it to make you feel like je was always there with you... soon he's going to use it to abduct you.

Somehow.

Dirk's obsession feels like a constant battle with himself.

Even more so than his fights with AR.

He begins to wonder what is truly right.

Is isolating you beside him the right thing to do?

What will his friends say?

That shouldn't matter, should it?

You can all talk together when you're safely with him... if he hasn't scared them off by then-

Yet, how would YOU feel towards what he's doing?

You'll hate him... and he can't blame you.

He'd hate him too. He probably already does.

But... what he doesn't hate is you.

Surely he can make you understand once he has you.

Dirk has always tried to be caring for you.

Even when your robot companion drags you into his home, you clinging to it with fear, Dirk greets you warmly.

Oh he feels so sick when he locks you in his home.

He feels he doesn't deserve you when you cower... no longer willing to converse with him like you used to.

You don't deserve him, he deserves only to suffer under the weight of his obsession.

He's always beating himself up about it the whole time, yet won't change any of it.

Even if you do somehow forgive him.

Even if you try to say you do care for him?

He isn't sure if he can believe you after he's kidnapped you.

Don't bother lying, he sees through it.

You can hate him... you're allowed to as any other sensible human would.

There's truly nothing he can do to salvage what he once had for you after he goes off the deep end.

He's made you all alone... now there's only him.

He knows he should let you go...

But wouldn't it be cruel to abandon you after he made your life hell?

He continues his behavior with this new form of reassurance.

He'll continue to look after you, he'll prove to you he can give you so much better.

He tries to show affection.

He gives you hugs, he tries to express his obsession in a loving way.

Perhaps even kisses, some on your cheeks or lips depending on his feelings?

Lucid yanderes tend to be self-destructive.

They know this isn't how they should feel.

Dirk knows he should do what's best for you.

His mind has been clouded in darkness, however...

Far as he knows now, HE'S what's best for you.

He promises to care for you like he's always done since you mean so much to him... ironically to help heal the pain he's caused... and is probably still causing.

Dirk still helps you when you cry and comforts you when you act out.

He emphasizes with your pain and feels sick that he knows why you feel this way.

Every touch he feels from you his heaven, while you may think he's hell.

Every apology from his lips doesn't feel truthful... they're empty.

He could always let you go...

He could always try to make things right...

Those options require giving you up.

Deep down... he knows he can't.

He feels he can finally say it,

He loves you too much to let you go.

He may be his own worst enemy but he wants to be selfish when it comes to you.

He's always at a constant war with himself, resulting in him seeming distant with affection.

You quickly become his everything... thoughts of you destroy his psyche...

Soon... he gives up... he surrenders... he begins to accept it.

He loves you...

and this is how he's going to show it.

[eliias-bouchard]

[09/11] in light of the fact that tumblr is dying, my discord is jonahfagnus. go friend me if you want to keep in contact mutuals or not

gods i spent so fucking long on the html in this stupid post let's hope it worked

eliias-bouchard -> autistic-grey-wind -> bigender-sliver-of-straw -> eliias-bouchard

hi im lynx (or just see my pronouns.page). im some sort of thing or entity. welcome to my blog. please please view my blog as a site the theme is so good i spent a lot of time on it

edit: ed/sh blogs will be blocked on sight. no exceptions. dont follow me

my ao3

- disused writing tag: #tmabsent

- when i make a new “my writing” tag ill put it here -> temp writing tag

look at my ocs also check out starfallverse

favourites tag -> #%3C3 (its supposed to be a heart)

i cant guarantee consistent cwing but i generally try & do “cw thing” and “thing cw”. all of my posts are ask to tag forever and ever (do link to the post you need tagging though)

if ur my friend i might have a specialised tag for posts that remind me of u. i also might not. dont feel bad if i dont have one for you, its not indicative of how much i like you. also i usually wont tell you if you have a tag or what it is you gotta find that out for yourself

humans tag for ender

no particular dni criteria but i am pro any and all good faith identities & choose to trust the person on what their identity is. i'll just block if i dont like you

all blinkies made with blinkies.cafe

[ID1: a blinkie with the bigender flag in the background reading “bigender & better than you”.

ID2: a blinkie with the bigender flag in the background reading “trans in both directions”.

ID3: a blinkie with rainclouds on either side reading “mike crew lover”.

ID4: a blinkie reading “gerry keay lover”.

ID5: a blinkie with the plural symbol reading “not a gatekeeper”.

ID6: a blinkie with the tbh creature on one side reading “autistic af”.

ID7: a blinkie with the aro flag reading “unloveable <2″

ID8: a blinkie with the ace flag reading “-1 bitches”

ID9: a blinkie with the tbh creature on one side reading "ask me about rw"

ID10: same as above but with "ask me about ksbd"

ID11: same as above but with "ask me about hk"

ID12: same as above but with “ask me about tma”

ID13: same as above but with “ask me about aurora”

ID14: same as above but with "ask me about my ocs"

ID15: a blinkie with the homestuck cat on one side reading “hi lev hows the omniscience coming”

ID16: a blinkie with an octopus on one side reading “<-- fish :)”

ID17: a blinkie with a space background reading “ur local vastard”

ID18: a meme reading "you can always ask me for my discord; its never socially unacceptable" /end ID]