Tumgik
#Sirius broke out of Azkaban
springs-hurts · 1 year
Text
I wasn't going to say anything about Sirius today but saw a reel and now I'm messed up.
People out there really think that Sirius thought Harry as an stand in for James. Like no no no, he didn't, he didn't, he did not.
He did compare him with James at some points no denying but he didn't saw him as James😭
As someone has already said on this site(i don't remember who worry) Sirius would never ever think of Harry as James, James was different, 𝘑𝘢𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘩𝘪𝘴.😭
He knew perfectly well about the difference b/w harry and James.
That's it.
25 notes · View notes
impishtubist · 9 months
Text
Remus apologists be like "Sirius cares more for Remus than for Harry 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺" even though canon says otherwise. But also all the Remus apologists are 22 and have never even read canon so.
15 notes · View notes
once-upon-an-imagine · 9 months
Text
You're Still The One - Sirius Black
A/N: ahh! well here it is! I really hope you loves like it as much as the preview! so, here we go!
Requests: - Anonymous asked: Sirius x Potter!sister where she raises Harry and they reunite once he’s out of Azkaban but she has to tell him that he’s a father too (up to you if they had a son or daughter) - twilightlover2007 asked: I would love to see post-askaban Sirius with a single mama(witch or muggle). The little one could be hers or she adopted the child when her friends were killed, thinking the little one is 6months to a year and when able to walk the little one just FOLLOWS Sirius everywhere. Even bumping into his legs when he stops walking suddenly. His own little duckling! Please and thank you!
Warnings: this is very much AU because Sirius gets out of Azkaban earlier and Remus was kinda working his case and visiting him there, so if you don't like that then, this is not the story for you xD, also mentions of sex and I think that's it but let me know if I missed anything!
Disclaimer: I don’t own Harry Potter :) gif isn’t mine :D  
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
You're Still The One
You’re still the one I run to The one that I belong to You’re still the one I want for life
Tumblr media
“Hey, Remus, do you have any milk? I ran out and didn’t have time to go to the store-”
As soon as you walked into Remus’ home, Sirius instantly froze when he heard your voice. That beautiful voice he hadn’t heard in three years. It wasn’t something unusual for you to walk into the next house as casually as you did. But this wasn’t the way it was supposed to go. Sirius was still getting ready to see you. Which is why, when you came back up, the milk bottle slipped out of your hand and broke down on the floor as soon as you saw someone standing in the living room— a half-naked someone covered in tattoos, who definitely wasn’t Remus.
“Love” Sirius smiled, looking at you. The same smile he always had when he looked at you. He was about to walk your way, but you quickly grabbed what was nearest to you, which happened to be the newspaper on the table. You cursed silently for leaving your wand in your own kitchen. “What are you gonna do? Kill a spider-?”
“Who are you?”
“Bambi, it’s me-” he started, but you backed away.
“No! Do not call me that! It can’t be you! Y-you’re not here!” you said, feeling your eyes welling up.
He couldn’t be here. Sirius was in Azkaban. You knew that. You hadn’t seen him in three years. He couldn’t be just standing here in the middle of Remus’ living room.
“Sweetheart, I can explain-”
“REMUS!”
“What?” you heard Remus’ voice coming downstairs with clothes for Sirius. “Oh shit” he muttered when he spotted you.
“What the fuck is going on?” you asked, still with the newspaper in front of you.
“Calm down, okay?”
“Calm down!?”
“Bambi-”
“Shut up! Don’t call me that!” you said, turning to Sirius with your paper and he placed his hands up in surrender.
“Okay, put the paper down” Remus said, walking closer to you and pointing his wand to clean up the milk on the floor. "Just calm down, and listen to me, okay?"
"I'm listening..."
"Are you calmed?" Remus asked.
"...I'm listening" you repeated.
“Look, first of all, please don’t be mad at Moony, okay? I asked him not to tell you I was getting out until we were sure” Sirius insisted.
“Oh, and just how long were the two of you in on this?”
Sirius and Remus exchanged a look you had seen too many times back at Hogwarts before Remus responded.
“Two months” he said, taking a few steps back when you were going to hit him with the paper again but Sirius got in the middle.
“TWO MONTHS! You have been in touch with Sirius and you knew he was getting out and you hid this from me for two months?! You knew all this time and you didn’t tell me? You kept the love of my life away from me?”
“So, I’m still the love of your life?”
“I don’t know! I’m still mad at you!”
“What? Why are you mad at me for? Be mad at Moony!”
“Oi! You just told her not to be mad at me!”
“I know but I’d rather have her be mad at you than me!”
“Enough!” you yelled, making the two of them look at you. “One of you just… tell me what the bloody hell is going on!”
“I didn’t do it, love” Sirius told you.
“Well, I obviously know that part” you frowned.
“Y-you do?”
“I told you” Remus repeated, rolling his eyes. “Look, I didn’t want to tell you until we were certain and we could actually have enough to get him out” Remus explained.
“Why are you two looking at me like that? The last time you looked at me like that, you told me Remus was a werewolf” you said, nervously.
“It was Peter” Remus told you.
“W-what?” you asked, feeling your heart drop. You slowly sat down on Remus’ kitchen table. The two friends looked at each other and sat down with you. “B-but Peter’s dead-”
“He’s not” Sirius told you. “We decided, James and I…” he said, noticing the pained expression on your face when he mentioned your brother. “I suggested Peter should be the Secret-Keeper and not me. We didn’t tell anyone” he explained. “I- I didn’t think he would-” he choked as a few tears ran down his face. “I am so sorry, love” he said, trying to grab your hand but you quickly pulled it away.
“James would have told me” you said, not really knowing what else to think. You always knew it wasn’t Sirius. It couldn’t have been. You knew Sirius would die before he’d let anything happen to James or Lily. But you couldn’t believe it was Peter either. “H-how come none of us knew?”
“We thought it was best that way” Sirius confessed. “After… what happened” he continued. “I tracked Peter down and when I cornered him, he yelled for the whole street to hear that I’d betrayed Lily and James. Then, before I could curse him, he blew apart the street with the wand behind his back, killed everyone within twenty feet of himself- and sped down into the sewer with the other rats” he explained.
“Scabbers” you muttered. “He’s been hiding as Scabbers this whole time?” you said as more tears ran down your face.
“I didn’t want to tell you because I had to find him first” Remus told you. “I couldn’t get Sirius out if they still thought Peter was dead” he explained.
“So you-” you said, looking at Remus. “Y-you found him? You found Peter?”
“I did” Remus nodded.
“And he’s-?”
“He is” Sirius assured you.
“H-how long have you known it was Peter?” you asked Remus, who nervously looked at Sirius.
“Since the night Sirius was taken away” Remus replied and you only nodded.
“D-do you have any other questions, love?” Sirius asked.
“What time is it?” you questioned, getting up. “I have to go back and make breakfast and-”
“I’ll take care of that” Remus said, getting up too. “I think there’s still a lot you two need to talk about he said, looking between you and Sirius before he pulled you closer to him as Sirius went back to get the clothes Remus had brought for him. “He doesn’t know” he informed you and your eyes widened in surprise.
“Y-you didn’t tell him?”
“I couldn’t” Remus admitted. “Look, I know you begged me a million times to take you to see him-”
“You always said no!”
“Yes, because he made me promise to never take you there and he’s right. You don’t ever want to see that horrible place” he said. “And you wouldn’t want to see him that way” he continued. “He was completely shattered, and the biggest part that was killing him was that he had failed you and Harry. So, I didn’t have the heart to tell him there was someone else. It would have killed him” he explained.
“Okay” you nodded.
You knew it wasn’t Remus’ story to tell. You had to do that. It just made you incredibly anxious but when you looked back at Sirius, you felt the same butterflies you did so many years ago. This was Sirius. Your Sirius.
“It’ll be okay, love” Remus said, kissing the side of your head. “I’ll be next door when you’re ready” he smiled.
“Thanks, Rem” you smiled back at him, giving him a hug.
“Just please don’t have sex on my bed… again” he muttered, making you push him off.
“No promises” you chuckled.
“I mean it, Potter!” you heard him yell as he left.
“What’s he on about?” Sirius asked as you entered the living room.
“He doesn’t want us to have sex on his bed” you told him. “Again.”
“Well, there goes my question to know if you wanted to go have sex on Moony’s bed again” he said, raising his eyebrow suggestively at you and making you chuckle slightly.
“I think we scarred him for life when he walked in on us in school” you reminded him, making him laugh. Merlin, how you had missed his laugh. You slowly walked closer to Sirius and sat on the sofa too.
“Hi, sunshine” he smiled at you.
“Hi” you said shyly, playing with your hands, which Sirius knew meant you were nervous. He slowly reached out and held your hand in his. “I’m sorry” you smiled, shedding a few tears and squeezing his hand tighter.
“Why are you sorry, love?”
“I don’t know” you chuckled. “For threatening you with a newspaper?”
“It’s not the first time” he reminded you before you threw your arms around his shoulders and he quickly wrapped his around your waist, bringing you closer.
“I missed you so much” you said, clinging on to him, feeling that they would rip him away from you again at any second.
“I missed you too, my love” he said, feeling his eyes watering as well.
“I-” you said, sighing. “How-” you stuttered. “I- um-”
“I’m fine, love” he assured you, knowing that’s what you wanted to ask him. “I’m here with you and I’m gonna be fine, and that’s all that matters, okay?”
“I knew you didn’t do it” you said, with your voice breaking a little. Sirius pulled you away and cupped your cheeks with his hands. “You know that, right?”
“Of course, I know that, sweetheart” he assured you. “You and Harry were the only thing keeping me sane in that place” he said. “I knew I had to make my way back to the two of you” he smiled.
“S-Sirius-”
“Oh, and Moony, if he asks, I mean” he smiled. “How is Harry? He’s about four now, right?”
“He is, b-but um, Sirius-”
“Merlin, I am dying to see him! I bet he looks just like…” he stopped, not wanting to mention James’ name again and make you upset. “Um… does he- uh… does he know about me?”
“He does” you nodded, making him smile brightly at you. “But… um… Sirius, there’s… something we need to talk about” you said, nervously.
“Oh, I… well, I understand if you don’t want me to see him… right away, I mean, I don’t want to come back here and expect you to change your whole life for me. That’s regarding us as well, I mean, I guess we should have that conversation-”
“Sirius!” you said, getting up and walking away from him. You took a deep breath and tried to calm yourself down. “I know that… there’s a lot of things that we have to discuss and talk about but… um…” you said, looking away and sitting down on the coffee table in front of him. “There’s something very important that I need to tell you” you said feeling extremely anxious.
“What’s wrong, love?” he asked, worriedly. “Is it about Harry? Do you not want me to see him yet?” he said. “Cause I would understand if-”
“No, um, is not about that” you said. “Well, I mean, it is, but… umm… Sirius” you said, taking a deep breath as he held your hands in his. “There’s… there’s someone else” you said, making him let go of your hands instantly.
“Oh” he said, with his expression stiffening a little as he felt his heart shatter into a million pieces. “I uh-” he cleared his throat. “Well, I uh-” he said, brushing a hand through his hair frustrated. “I didn’t think you’d be waiting for me and- I um-”
“W-what? No! Sirius, that is not what I mean!” you said, grabbing his hands again and he looked at you, still a bit unsure. “Sirius… you are the love of my life” you said, with a few tears rolling down your cheeks again. “That was never going to change. I would have always been waiting for you” you assured him. “What I meant was is… there’s someone else… other than Harry” you added.
“W-what do you mean?”
“Um… a few weeks after they took you away I… I found out I was pregnant” you informed him.
“Y-you-? W-what?” he asked, looking stunned. “Y-you- um- we, we have a child?” he asked, feeling his heart beating incredibly fast and breaking at the same time.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, I… didn’t really know how. And Remus wouldn’t let me go with him-”
“No!” he snapped a little, bringing you closer to him. “I never wanted you to go there or see me like that” he said, cupping your cheek with his hand. “Sweetheart, I am so sorry you had to go through this all by yourself! I- I wasn’t here for you! I-”
“No, Sirius, you don’t have to be sorry” you assured him.
“I can’t believe we have a kid” he said with a beautiful smile appearing on his face and you gently grabbed his hand from your cheek.
“Her name is Lyra” you said, making Sirius’ heart stop again as he felt tears rolling down his cheeks.
“We have a girl?” he asked, choking a little and you nodded, smiling.
“Would you like to meet her?”
“R-really?”
“I know there’s still a million things we have to talk about but, if you want to, I would love for you to see Harry and meet Lyra” you said getting up and pulling him with you. “Ready?” you started walking towards the door but Sirius didn’t move. “Sirius?”
“D-do you think they’ll like me?” he asked worriedly, warming your heart. You cupped his cheek and smiled at him.
“They’re gonna love you” you assured him. “They already do. Harry has always been dying to know his uncle Padfoot” you informed him. “I told him he was traveling around the world so he’s probably going to ask you a billion questions” you said, smiling. “And he’s always telling Lyra how cool you are” you added. “She smiles a lot when she sees your picture” you explained. “I told you, I knew you didn’t do it” you said. “And I was not going to let Harry or your daughter grow up thinking you were a-” you choked, not able to finish that sentence. You were never able to. You never believed Sirius would kill your brother and his wife. He would have died before let anything happen to them.
“I love you” he said, hugging you closer to him. “I love you so much” he said with tears streaming down his face as he brought you closer, kissing your forehead.
“I love you too” you smiled, wiping away his tears before you pulled him closer and kissed him. It felt like every single time you had kissed Sirius. It didn’t matter what else the two of you had to discuss. Your feelings hadn’t changed. You knew that. Sirius was the love of your life. And now, he was back.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
As soon as Sirius walked into the house next door to Remus’, he instantly felt at home, just like he did when he ran away to your parents’ house all those years ago. Except it was a lot cozier and it certainly had your touch everywhere.
“Please don’t mind the mess” you smiled nervously at him as you started grabbing some things and finding your wand somewhere so you quickly fixed everything up. “I would have cleaned up but- um… well, I wasn’t really expecting-”
Sirius cut you off by giving you a peck on the lips. “Please don’t ever apologize for that. Not to me, love” he insisted and you smiled back at him.
“Harry, are you up, sweetie?” you asked, hearing noise coming from the kitchen.
“I’m in here, Aunt Bambi” you heard. You were about to walk over there but Sirius pulled you back.
“Aunt Bambi?” he asked with an arched eyebrow.
“He kept pestering me one day asking why Moony had a nickname, his father had a nickname and you had a nickname, and I didn’t, so Remus told him you used to call me Bambi, and… it kind of stuck with him” you explained.
“I’m glad you kept hearing that nickname you claim to hate so much” he smirked.
“It kinda grew on me” you admitted, rolling your eyes a little. “Hi sweetheart” you said, spotting Harry with chocolate all over his face.
“Uncle Moony made chocolate chip pancakes!” he said, excitedly.
“I can see that” you chuckled, walking over to him and cleaning his face. “And where is Uncle Moony?”
“He’s upstairs, changing Lyra” he replied as you finished cleaning him up.
“Um, honey, I would like you to meet someone” you said as Sirius stood at the entrance. You saw Harry’s face light up as he got off the stool and ran over to him.
“UNCLE PADFOOT!”
“Hey, bud” Sirius said, kneeling to pick Harry up. “You’re so big now!”
“It’s so cool that you’re here!” Harry said excitedly. “Uncle Moony has told me so many stories about you!” he said, making Sirius smile back at you. “What are you doing home?”
“Well, bud, I guess I just… missed you all so much” he said, kissing Harry’s head before putting him down.
“Do you want to see my broom? Aunt Bambi says it’s just like the one you and dad had, but she never lets me fly it-!”
“Hey, that’s not true” you complained.
“She won’t teach me Quidditch either-!”
“That’s because I don’t play Quidditch and neither does your Uncle Moony” you reminded him.
“But you said Uncle Padfoot played” he said, excitedly before turning back to Sirius. “Would you teach me?”
“Of course, I would” Sirius said, feeling his eyes water a little.
“Are you okay, Uncle Padfoot?” Harry asked a bit confused.
“Yeah, mate. I’m fine” he said, giving him another big hug. “I just… missed you so much” he said, with his voice breaking a little.
“Why don’t you go get your broom, love? I’m sure your uncle Padfoot would love to see it” you said, kissing his forehead.
“Yes! I will be right back!” he said excitedly, jumping up and down before he ran upstairs.
“You okay?” you asked, Sirius who was still looking Harry’s way.
“He just…” he said with a few tears rolling down his cheeks. “He looks so much like…”
“James, I know” you finished for him, pulling him closer. “He has Lily’s eyes though” you smiled.
“He does” Sirius said, kissing your temple. “I’m so sorry, love” he said, making you look at him a bit confused. “I’m so sorry I wasn’t here for you” he said, cupping your cheek. “I-” he sighed. “How-” he stuttered. “I- um-”
“I’m okay” you smiled sweetly. “I mean, there are good days… and not-so-good days” you admitted. “I just miss him” you said with a few tears falling from your eyes. “And I hate that he and Lily aren’t here to see Harry” you said.
“I know, love” Sirius said, wiping away your tears and hugging you to him.
“Hey” you heard Remus walking down the stairs with someone in his arms. You pulled away from Sirius and walked over to them.
“Good morning, my love” you said, taking the toddler from Remus’ arms.
“Mummy” she smiled brightly at you as you kissed her cheek.
Sirius felt like his heart was going to explode. He had no idea how he could love you even more. Or how he could love someone at first sight. And there you were, holding the most beautiful girl he had ever seen in his entire life. She was the other way than Harry. She looked just like you, but she had his deep grey eyes.
“Sweetheart, I’d like you to meet someone” you told her as you walked back over to Sirius. “Sirius, this is Lyra” you said, as Sirius felt his entire heart melting when Lyra smiled shyly at him. “Can you say, hi, honey?” you asked as she waved her little hand at Sirius.
“H-hi” she said, resting her head on your shoulder.
“Hi, Lyra” Sirius said, as new tears rolled down his cheeks. “You are so beautiful” he smiled.
“Uncle Moony says I look like mum” she said.
“You do” Sirius nodded. “You’re just as beautiful as her” he smiled.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
“I made this for Uncle Padfoot, do you think he’ll like it?” Harry asked you, showing the new drawing of him with Sirius.
It had been a few weeks since Sirius was back and each day, both kids were getting more attached to him. He was basically Harry’s new favorite person, and you couldn’t blame him. Harry spent the entire day asking him questions about James, playing Quidditch, and Sirius basically doing whatever he wanted, and spoiling him with gifts.
And then, there was Lyra. at first, she was a bit shy but it wasn’t long before she started warming up to him. Every single time Sirius appeared in a room, you saw your daughter’s face lighting up just as much as his did. She followed him everywhere. She cried whenever Sirius had to leave again because he was still staying with Remus since he said he didn’t want to turn your life upside down or the kids’ lives for that matter by him being back.
And it was no secret that Sirius was instantly wrapped around Lyra’s little finger. You could tell he loved Harry as much as you did. He was practically becoming his best friend and he loved spending time with him. But Lyra had brought something out in Sirius that you had never seen before. Which is why, you wanted to ask him to move in with the three of you. Firstly, because he was practically living here already. He came in before the kids woke up and he left when they were tucked in. Mostly so Lyra wouldn’t cry when he left. But also because you had missed him so much, and now he was back. And you wanted him back. With you.
“I’m sure he’ll love it, sweetheart” you said, kissing Harry’s head as he and Lyra had breakfast on the kitchen counter.
“Are you going to marry Uncle Padfoot?” he suddenly asked, making you choke on the coffee you were drinking.
“W-what?”
“I asked Uncle Moony if you and Uncle Padfoot were married but he said no” he said, casually. “I think you two should be married” he shrugged.
“Why do you think that, love?” you asked, as you fed Lyra.
“Because you’re my godmother and he’s my godfather” he said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
“W-well, I’ll… think about that” you smiled. “But… how would you guys feel if um- uncle Padfoot comes stay with us?”
“You mean live here?” Harry asked, excitedly.
“Yes” you nodded.
“With us?”
“Yes” you repeated.
“Where would he stay?” he asked, curiously.
“Um, well… he would stay with me” you explained.
“So, you are getting married?”
“I don’t know, Harry, I mean, I would have to ask him first” you chuckled.
“Uncle Moony said he asked you” he replied.
“What? Stop talking to your Uncle Moony!” you complained.
“Uncle Moony” Lyra repeated, smiling.
“Look, I will talk to Sirius today and I will ask him if he’d like to live with us” you explained. “So, I wanted to know what you guys think about it” you smiled.
“Really?”
“Yes, because we are a team. And you two are the most important people in my life” you said, poking each on their noses. “So… what do you think?”
“We love Uncle Padfoot!” Harry insisted. “Right, Lyra?”
“Yes!” she smiled, looking up at him.
“Okay, then. I guess I’m going to have to ask Uncle Padfoot” you smiled, nervously.
“Ask Uncle Padfoot what?” you heard Sirius walking in on the back door. “You monkeys are already up?” he said, messing Harry’s hair with his hand and picking up Lyra from her chair, kissing her cheek.
“Aunt Bambi wants to ask you to marry her so you can come live with us!” Harry said, excitedly.
“Harry!” you widened your eyes, feeling your cheeks burning instantly.
“W-what?” Sirius asked, looking at you.
“We want you to mawy mummy” Lyra repeated.
“Okay, that’s enough” you said, taking her from Sirius and placing her back on her seat. “Um, Sirius, could I see you in the other room for a moment?”
“Sure. Lead the way, Bambi” he smirked.
“Bambi” Lyra giggled.
“So, what’s this I hear about you wanting to marry me and move in with you?”
“Shut up, Black, and stop looking at me like that!”
“Oh, it’s Black now” he smirked. “I see you’re really riled up, Potter” he chuckled.
“Look, I just… wanted to ask you…” you started, avoiding his eyes. You knew he was enjoying this.
“Yes?”
“Well, I was thinking about the possibility of you… moving in with us?”
“That’s not what your kids said” he smiled.
“First of all, they’re your kids too” you glared at him. “And secondly, it’s only because Harry asked if we were going to get married” you explained.
“Really?”
“Yes, he thinks we should because you’re his godfather and I’m his godmother” you told him.
“Kid’s got a point” he said.
“Sirius! I’m not joking!”
“Neither am I” he said, dropping his smile and looking at you.
“What?”
“I don’t see why we shouldn’t get married” he shrugged. “I asked you before. You said yes” he reminded you.
“That was three years ago. A lot has changed since then-”
“Well, my feelings for you, haven’t” he clarified. “Have yours?”
“No, of course not!”
“I’m not saying we have to do it right away” he told you, smiling sweetly. “I’m just saying… if you’d ask… I’d say yes” he said.
“You think I’m going to ask you?”
“Why not? I asked you last time! It’s only fair, love!” he mocked you as you crossed your arms in front of your chest with a raised eyebrow. “You know, I forgot how cute you looked when you were mad” he said, pulling you closer. “I’m not going anywhere, love” he said, cupping your cheek with his hand. “You are the love of my life. You always have been. And you, Harry, and Lyra are the only thing that matters to me” he continued. “And Moony, if he asks” he said, making you chuckle. “Look, I’ve missed three years already and I don’t want to miss another second” he said, making you smile. “So, I will ask you, however you want me to, whenever you want me to, as many times as you’d like me to, my love” he said, wrapping his arms around your waist and you gave him a peck on the lips.
“I love you” you said, smiling.
“I love you too” he said, kissing you again. “You wanna go tell the kids?”
“Yeah, might as well” you said, kissing his cheek and pulling him towards the kitchen where the two of you saw Harry helping Lyra get down from her seat. Sirius felt you stop at the entrance and he grabbed your hand. He noticed the look on your face. In the past weeks, he noticed you getting that look whenever Harry was with Lyra.
“Harry’s a really good big brother” he said, kissing the side of your head.
“Yeah” you smiled. “He doesn’t just look like James” you said, resting your head on his shoulder.
“He’d be really proud of you, you know that, right? So, would Evans” he told you. “They picked right” he smiled.
“Yeah” you said, kissing his cheek. “They did” you told him. 
The End
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
A/N: I hope you loves liked it! and I hope this keeps rolling xD I have a few 9-1-1 imagines coming up, and also Stranger Things, and/or Remus, James hopefully!
tags: @twilightlover2007 , @hisparentsgallerryy
1K notes · View notes
jamesunderwater · 8 months
Text
mother fuck, while doing research for my james potter essay for @annabtg, I came across THIS quote:
Madam Rosmerta: “Of all the people to go over to the Dark Side, Sirius Black was the last I’d have thought … I mean, I remember him when he was a boy at Hogwarts. If you’d told me what he was going to become, I’d have said you’d had too much mead.”
Sirius Black was, even to someone who barely knew him, SUCH a deeply good person that he was the last person you'd have thought would become a death eater. THE LAST PERSON. Not the loyal, Gryffindor-bred James Potter, not quiet Prefect Remus Lupin, SIRIUS FUCKING BLACK, the firstborn son of a blood supremacist family with several family members who actively served Voldemort.
Young Sirius Black was so full of goodness that if someone said he was going to be a death eater, Rosmerta would have thought they must be drunk.
And Remus and McGonagall and Dumbledore and everyone else who knew him so much better let him go to Azkaban without a trial, never tried to get him out, never gave this boy the benefit of the doubt.
And then what did he do when he broke himself out of Azkaban? He forgave Remus in an instant. He rejoined the Order. He trusted Dumbledore enough to willingly stay locked up again. He handed his house over to be used for the Order, welcomed people to come and go as they pleased, to stay long-term if they needed -- even Snape, who had recently been eager to have him killed. And in a matter of two years, showed Harry more parental love and support than anyone had before -- to the point of dying for him, exactly as his parents did.
So when you actually look at canon Sirius, I think it's very clear why he was the last person you'd expect.
583 notes · View notes
crymyeyesout1 · 7 months
Text
Set in their sights
poly!marauders 
Summary: The marauders are all in a poly relationship with each other and Lily when they all individually become interested in a shy hufflepuff in their year. What about this little hufflepuff makes them all feel complete? Will she return their affections?
Warnings: Poly relationship, mentions of smut, lots of fluff, very shy oc, mentions of child abuse. let me know if there are any more
PSA: this is my first time writing on tumblr so please be kind, I'm trying my best. And there is absolutely no peter in this story so sorry not sorry. Please let me know if you like it and if I should write more.
✩₊˚.⋆✩⋆⁺₊✩
James and Sirius were hurriedly making their way through the train; their lovers were already in the marauders designated compartment and they were running late. It would seem as if the two hadn’t seen them since their fifth  year ended just three months ago, but in reality it had been only five days since their shared boyfriend and girlfriend had departed from James’ home where they had spent almost the entire summer doing whatever they pleased. 
“Pads slow down you are going to run someone over” James pleaded with his boyfriend
“ Prongs please we are late and I’m not going to-” he was cut off by a body colliding with him square in the chest and falling over. He peered down to see a small girl and became almost immediately enamored with in his eyes she was the most adorable girl he’d ever seen to others she was almost odd looking her hair was mostly pitch black but around her face and peeking out a bit from the underneath was bright blonde and all of it was naturally curly. The girl was wearing a hufflepuff jumper that looked at least one size too big with a black skirt and sheer tights that had some kind of pattern to them, stars, Sirius recognized and on her feet lay black worn out combat boots. Sirius reached out his hand to help the poor girl up and for a few seconds she hesitated almost as if she was scared of what would happen if she did take his hand, which reluctantly she did. He carefully pulled her to her feet and as he did so he took quick notice of her eyes: they were a dark gray and dull like there was no life behind them, they were slightly sunken and were surrounded by deep dark blueish purple eye bags. Just by looking into them Sirius could tell she was sad and it broke his heart a part of him wanted to take this girl and hide her away from all the evils of the world that she had already seen. He wanted to be the reason the light returned to those eyes. His thoughts were going a million miles a minute when someone clears their throat dragging him back to reality. It was James, his boyfriend, how could he be so stupid as to be so caught up with this random girl that he completely blanked on his relationship. He had two boyfriends and a girlfriend already. What was he doing ogling this poor girl? 
“Hello there, sorry about this brute, he can’t pay attention to anything even if it's right in front of him” James quickly apologized to the poor girl on Sirius’ behalf.
“It's quite alright” a soft and dreamy voice came from the girl in front of them, James instantly took more notice of the girl completely understanding he boyfriends staring now. In just three words you had encapsulated him and he needed more.
“Well little love, I’m James Potter and can I tell you how much of a pleasure it is to run into you. Please you must tell me your name, little love.” The girl blushed furiously at the nickname and softly responded.
“Abigail Gaunt '' Her last name caused Sirius to freeze, flashes of his mothers teachings came flooding into his brain. The Gaunts were the last known descendant of Salazar Slytherin, but the last living Gaunt was put in azkaban for murder by means of the killing curse, an unforgivable. How was one standing in front of him, and how was she a hufflepuff, oh how he would love to see the look on his mothers face the last known heir of slytherin sorted into hufflepuff. Surely she couldn’t be in his year, his own sorting into gryffindor had caused uproar but this, this was a whole new level. James had seemed to notice the shock on Sirius’ face and had elbowed his arm, snapping him out of whatever trance he was in.
“Oh I’m Sirius Black, but of course you already know that doll” he winked at her and if her face could have gotten any redder it would.
“Um well yes but um I-It's nice to m-m-meet you” she stuttered out trying with all her might to act normal but in her mind no she wasn’t normal not even in the slightest bit. But two fourths of the infamous marauders stood in front of her and were they? Merlin forbid they were flirting with her? 
Impossible, flirt with her? What were they thinking?
She tried to reason with herself when a beautiful voice filled the hall
“There you boys are Remus and I were starting to worry oh! Who is this?” The voice belonged to the one and only Lily Evans, every aspect of her was beautiful, it was no wonder she had the three most sought after boys in the school on her leash. And what was that last part, she had noticed the small hufflepuff standing with her boys. Abigail might as well have been on fire with how hot and red her cheeks were.
“Lily Pads! We were just on our way when Padfoot decided to tackle Abby here” he looked down at her and cocked his head to the right “ I can call you Abby right? Good because that what I’m calling you, Abby is so much cuter sounding than stuffy Abigail” The girl now newly nicknamed Abby gave a small squeak as the larger and very muscular boy wrapped an arm around her and pulled her close to him and gave a small “sure”  when she noticed his expecting gaze. If someone could die from embarrassment Abby definitely would be long dead. 
“Oh it's so nice to me you Abby what year are you?” Lily gushed at the girl in her boyfriend's arms, she was just too cute and her deeply reddened cheeks only made her more so. Lily wanted nothing more than to kiss them but that would need to be discussed with her boys.
“Come on boys, let's leave Abby here to go find her compartment, I’m sure her friends are waiting, just as Remus is waiting on us.” She leaned down and pressed a chaste kiss to Abby’s cheek then turned and walked back to their compartment. Abby didn’t have a chance to even think about how she definitely didn’t have any friends waiting on her, in fact the past five minutes have been the most interaction she’s had with someone her age ever she thought. Each of the boys had followed lily’s lead and each kissed one of your cheeks and moved to their compartment. Leaving Abby a flustered mess in the middle of the train.
809 notes · View notes
lemongrass77777-moved · 3 months
Text
*sobbing*
James Potter and Sirius Black loved each other so much. they were inseparable. they made mirrors because they couldn’t bear to be separated for detentions. James took Sirius in after he ran away. James made Sirius his son’s godfather. He trusted Sirius beyond all his other companions. Sirius broke out of Azkaban to protect his son. Prongs the patronus saved Sirius from the dementors kiss. Harry named his eldest son after both of them so their names would be remembered together.
241 notes · View notes
serverusslaype · 1 year
Text
Shameless, pt. 8
Severus Snape x professor!reader fic
Tumblr media
Shameless Masterpost
omg hi guys.............
i'm so sorry for leaving it this long, i just literally could not write anything, my brain was absolutely fogged up - probably because i had covid unknowingly lmao. this is another long chapter so i hope this makes up for it! <3
thank you for reading and for all your kind messages and support, i appreciate you all so much. i know i say this constantly but i really mean it. stay safe and keep healthy, guys!! love you :')
let's get this train on the ROAD!!!
The summer of '93 was an interesting feat, to say the least. Sirius Black had escaped from Azkaban, and you'd found yourself dating someone you never thought you would.
You had not expected yourself to be caught up in a whirlwind type of romance, especially not by someone you'd despised back in school. Yet, here you were, arm in arm with none other than school menace, Benjamin Bluewater. The two of you were currently strolling through Hogsmeade, wide smiles spread across your rosy-cheeked, cold faces. The snow crunched beneath your feet as Ben wrapped an affectionate arm around your waist, pulling you close against him. You failed horribly at trying to hide the bashful smile that picked at the corners of your shivering lips.
"I'm gonna miss seeing you every other day." Ben said, giving you a squeeze.
"Yeah," you hummed happily, glancing up, "this summer has been very..." You trailed off, struggling to find the words. Ben glanced down at you, a lazy half-smile reaching his lips.
"Unexpected?" He chuckled, finishing your sentence for you.
A grin broke out on your face and Ben leant down to plant a soft kiss against your smiling mouth. "Definitely." You replied against his lips, nodding softly, letting your eyes fall back to the powdery-white trail in front of you as he pulled away. "You can visit me if it gets too hard." You teased, nudging him playfully with your elbow. It'd only been a month and a bit of seeing Ben, but he really had you hooked. Each time you saw him, the agonising thought of you and Snape melted away from your mind a little bit more. You felt like you'd finally got control - he was no longer dictating how you felt. However, you did feel a tad bit guilty. At times it felt like you were using Ben to get over the broody Potions Master. You didn't dare tell him about it either, you were pretty sure that he wouldn't take it well - in fact, you were certain he wouldn't. How would he believe that you'd fallen for the man that used to cause the pair of you grief in school? For starters, he used to be your teacher all those years ago, and secondly, in Ben's mind, he considered Snape an ugly old git.
"I think you'll be the first to crack, Y/N." Ben nudged you back, prompting a playful scoff to fall from your mouth. Ben's lips broke into a grin, pleased with your reaction.
"As if," You choked. "Wait, who was it again that turned up at my door the day after our first date? Oh yeah, you." You scrunched your nose up at him and poked out your tongue, though, your attention was soon hooked by the flash of what looked like a figure dressed in all-black. Your breath caught in your throat as your head snapped to the left, eyes flicking desperately between the forest of pine trees, searching  for what you thought you had seen. Ben picked up on your change in behaviour almost immediately.
It couldn't be, you thought, heart suddenly beginning to race.
"You okay?" His bushy brows furrowed at your unusual skittish demeanour, clearly worried about you. Ben's alarmed voice did not compute in your head. "Hey," His hand slipped from your arm and fell to your wrist, tugging it at it to pull you from your thoughts, inducing a soft gasp from you as you spun on your heel to face Ben. It looked as if you had just seen a ghost of some sort.
"What?" You questioned softly, blinking. Ben stared at you.
"You look like you've just seen a ghost, Y/N." He said, concerned. You swallowed and wet your lips, looking down at the ground as he brushed his thumb tenderly against your wrist.
"I'm alright." You looked back up at Ben, placing a forced smile upon your lips. He didn't seem convinced, though he didn't press you. He gave you the benefit of the doubt. "Just, err, just a little on edge, you know with, erm, the whole Sirius Black thing." You lied, a nervous chuckle leaving your throat.
"I don't think the mass murderer known as Sirius Black would bother himself with a place such as Hogsmeade, Y/N." Ben smiled, almost amusedly at you. You stayed silent, not sure what to say. Ben let his blue eyes to flick between yours, almost like he was attempting to read your mind. You broke the connection and glanced away, an uncomfortable feeling creeping up your spine. Ben sighed gently and looked ahead of the two of you. The town of Hogsmeade was settled in the distance, shrouded in a cloudy mist. An idea popped in his mind. "Would a tea or a hot beverage of some sort make you feel a little better?"
"Um, yes, I could go for a tea." You nodded lightly, looking back to Ben. A small smile graced his features as he let his warm hand slip into yours. The corners of your lips tugged upwards a little. Ben felt at ease once more as your pretty face was lit up with that bright smile of yours. He couldn't resist placing another sweet kiss upon your lips.
"Alright. Let's go, I know just the place."
You laid on your bed in your quarters at Hogwarts, the pale sunlight peeking through your curtains was slowly ceasing as the evening began to set in. Your mind was constantly reeling back to yesterday afternoon. You continuously replayed the memory of the flash of black in your mind, attempting to put a name to what it was. A sigh of frustration left your lips, leading into a groan. You refused to acknowledge who you thought it was. There was just no way.
All those feelings and thoughts that you'd buried and hidden away with the idea of Ben started to creep back out of it's cage and it frightened you. Perhaps it was foolish of you to think that you'd move on so quickly. A month and a bit was definitely not enough time to heal. Yes, you were unquestionably foolish to think that forty-three days was a satisfactory amount of time to rid yourself of the thought of someone you had been near almost every day for a year.
Whatever, you thought. It'll pass. It will... won't it?
Gods, now you were doubting yourself. You knew you still felt deeply for Snape, of course you did, you spent almost a whole year in his presence, but you thought dating someone else in the meantime would have solved some of that. Jesus, that's messed up. Were you just using Ben to get over Snape? This was so wrong on so many levels. You liked Ben, truly you did, but you always found yourself comparing him to Severus. The way he spoke, the way he moved... your mind was plagued with him, and you were an idiot to think that locking away the thought of Severus would do anything but help yourself. You did this to yourself, and now you deserved to deal with the consequences. You just had to act like your feelings for him didn't exist, maybe that would help. …Maybe it wouldn't, but that was the best idea you had right now.
You needed to clear your head, and badly. Your buzzing thoughts were starting to drown you. You quickly slipped out of your bed and headed out of your room, quietly shutting the door behind you. Just as you were about to turn around to walk down the hallway, a tall, shabby looking man stood in your way. He had light brown hair with flecks of grey in it, a fluffy moustache and a rather painful looking scar was scraped across the middle of his handsome face.
"Oh- hello," You said in surprise, confusion evident in your tone. The man smiled at you jovially, his eyes crinkling at the edges. He looked rather tired and pale. You tilted your head at him, furrowing your brows.
"I apologise for scaring you," The man pursed his lips as he attempted a light-hearted joke, shoving his hands into his pockets. "I'm Remus, err, Remus Lupin, the new Defence Against the Dark Arts professor." He added, his eyebrows raising a tad.
"Oh, yes, of course!" You instantly smiled, your cheeks turning a little red out of embarrassment. Lupin found it rather endearing. You scolded yourself for forgetting soemthing so important - Dumbledore had mentioned this the day before you left for Summer break. "I'm so sorry, it had totally slipped my mind. My name is Y/N L/N," Your smile widened as you held out a friendly hand for him to shake. "I'm the professor of Herbology here at Hogwarts."
"Ah," He nodded, returning your smile and shaking your hand. His grip was firm. "Lovely to meet you. I hope we get along well, Professor L/N." Remus said trustingly, his hands returning to his pockets. You clasped yours together, resting them against your hips out of habit.
"I'm sure we will, and please, call me Y/N." You grinned. Remus gave you a curt nod. "Is this your first day here?"
"Teaching yes, but in regards to having been here before? No." He replied.
"Oh?"
"I attended Hogwarts as a small boy, so it's a little nostalgic walking round the place again." Remus explained, earning a surprised look from you.
"It seems as though every single teacher here also used to be a student here." You laughed lightly, inducing an amused smile from the new professor.
"It seems that way, yes." Remus nodded.
"Well, I hope to see you around, Remus." You smiled politely at him, noticing the way he slumped slightly in posture, almost like he was trying to hide himself. Remus returned your smile and dismissed you with a nod, continuing past you with a slow gait. You let yourself think for a moment. Those scars looked pretty horrific, they looked rather... deep. A grimace twisted your facial features as your mind raced with quite gruesome and morbid theories on how Lupin had acquired those wounds. You shook your head rather vigorously as if to relieve your mind of the grisly images that were popping in and out of it.
The hallways and corridors of Hogwarts were peacefully empty once again. Students, old and new, were still back at home preparing for the next school year that began in just a couple days. Goosebumps erupted on your body out of anticipation as you thought about what the year could hold - though, you were mainly excited to get back to teaching your beloved subject. In fact, you'd missed it a lot over the summer. More than you expected to, despite the distraction called Ben.
A tiny smile flickered on your lips at the thought of him, your eyes glued to the floor in front of you as your feet carried you forwards, a cool chill wrapping itself around your bare shoulders. You were wearing a thick-ish, buttercup-yellow night dress; the sleeves reached your wrists, but it was a little baggy up top, causing the wide neckline to slip partially off your shoulder. The chill made you quickly pull it up with your fingers, enveloping yourself with your arms.
Bumping into Professor Lupin outside your room had caught you off-guard. The thought of grabbing a coat of some sort had slipped from your mind the second your curious and confused eyes fell onto him. You shivered slightly, cursing yourself for being so forgetful sometimes. It might have been late August, but Scotland's freezing climate left no survivors.
"Did you not think it unwise to go around strolling in such... poorly thought out attire, Professor L/N? It is almost as cold as the arctic." That deep voice that had caused you so much grief and heartache shot through your head like a stray bullet. You froze in your position, your breath hitching as you refused to turn around to acknowledge the man that spoke with such articulated words it seemed laughable. You felt like you couldn't move. Like you were in a glue trap, like a little mouse.
Eventually, you thawed. "I'm not cold." You replied shortly, reluctantly turning around to face Snape. Your heart instantly sped into a gallop as your eyes fell onto his tall, brooding figure. Then and there, thought of Ben entered your mind as you stared at the Potions Master, immediately comparing the two. You knew Ben didn't make your heart race like he did. Your shoulders suddenly slumped with guilt. You shouldn't be thinking any of this. Ben was good for you, he treated you with kindness and respect, and most of all, he actually liked you.
"Your trembling figure says otherwise." Snape tilted his head at you, scrutinising you. Right then you wanted to shrink down into nothingness. You couldn't bear to feel so vulnerable underneath his eyes. Somehow, Snape looked better than the last time you saw him. And you hated that. You were sure you looked utterly terrible right now.
"I'm fine." You said sternly, dragging out the syllables as you fought back the bitter glare that was itching to break out onto your face.
"Fine, hm..." Snape drawled, almost mocking and sarcastic, letting his dark eyes drop down your figure, studying your improper outfit. You hugged yourself tighter at the sight, cheeks suddenly burning as you felt rather self-conscious. His brows knitted together suddenly, like something had just clicked in his mind. "Why aren't you wearing a coat?"
You hesitated. "I forgot to grab one." Snape's brow arched at you disapprovingly. You fought the urge to groan at him. "I bumped into the new Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher, Remus Lupin, outside my door." You explained, tone flat. "It's not like you care whether I freeze to death or not anyway." You added, rather bitterly. Snape narrowed his eyes at you, glaring. He did care, but he would never show it. Not right now, at least.
"Lupin?" He repeated, ignoring your last comment as his jaw ticked out of irritation. You frowned at his odd reaction. "I suggest you stay away from him, Professor L/N. For your own..." Snape trailed off, pondering on his words as he let his eyes sweep over you in a patronising manner. "...good." He uttered, almost like a warning. You were completely and utterly confused. Why did Snape seem so unwelcoming towards Lupin, he'd just joined Hogwarts, unless there was... history between them? Was there?
"What's wrong with Remus?" You asked, eyes narrowing in curiosity and suspicion about his feelings regarding the new Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher. Snape's jaw clenched at the sound of Lupin's first name, almost like he flinched. "He seemed perfectly kind and pleasant earlier."
Snape didn't reply. A harsh, exasperated sigh fell through your nose as you rolled your eyes at the enigmatic man before you, growing tired of his games. Why did he always act so cryptic? What was the problem with telling you the truth? Would it be so bad?
Before you could protest and poke at his mind, Snape began to stalk away from you, prompting a curt scoff to leave your lips. Your teeth were gritted out of frustration as you stared at the back of his head. Christ, he really hadn't changed - he was still pissing you off at an almighty rate. At this point, it was impressive.
"Hey!" You exclaimed, forcing Snape to halt in his tracks. He turned his head to the left, silently encouraging you to continue. "Would you just answer me?"
"I don't owe you anything." Snape said rather coldly. You clenched your jaw rather angrily at his rude reply. Jesus, will this guy ever just bite the bullet for once and give in?
"When you tell me to 'avoid' Professor Lupin, I think that demands an explanation as to why I should, Snape," You said, shaking your head at him like he was daft. "You must be delusional to think otherwise!" That must have struck a nerve within the Potions Master, as he swiftly spun around, his cloak turning with him dramatically like a bat, making you shrink in regret. He stormed over to you, footsteps heavy and determined. You backed yourself up, a little unnerved by his sudden and intense approach towards you. Snape got right up in your face and you could feel his hot breath dance across your skin, sending anxious goosebumps down your spine. It felt like your heart was about to fall out of your chest from the high gear it had suddenly kicked into. 
How could- no, why was your body still reacting so fiercely to Snape? Weren't you meant to be focusing on Ben?
"Lupin is not who you think he is, Y/N." Snape warned, snapping you out of your thoughts. It nearly sounded like there was a hint of concern in his voice, like he was worried about you. You had to laugh at that, as if Snape - the man who had pretended like you didn't exist for half a year - cared for you. He'd never stoop to such a pathetic ideal. You brushed the hurtful lie under a dusty rug in your mind, averting your attention back to the pair of deep, obsidian-coloured eyes that sat mere inches away from your own.
"And how do you know that?" You challenged, a hint of venom in your voice as you mocked his serious tone. Snape sneered at you, leaning back from your face, like he was disgusted.
"Your ignorance is blinding." He replied bitterly, still refusing to explain anything to you. At this point he seemed like a child to you. From his the way he glared at you, and reeled back from your agitated little form, Snape seemed to be disappointed in you. You didn't think he had a leg to stand on with that idea.
And so, that was your last straw, you couldn't hold in your frustration anymore; it felt like all the pressure that had been building up beneath your skin was coming to a rise and it had finally burst at the seams. "Jesus, Snape!" You cried out, infuriated, your hands flying up to pull helplessly at your hair. "Why is it so hard for you to answer me?! Are you so incapable of that?!"
Snape seemed a little taken aback by your outburst as the ill feeling of deja vu began to seep into his bones. This felt a little too familiar: it reminded him of that night he found you drunk. Yet, right now, you were stone-cold sober, and still shouting the same things at him. In regards to your outburst, he truly hadn't seen it coming, and yet, he was almost always aware of how you were feeling. He could read you so easily. To him, you were like a book he'd read almost a thousand times. He remained quiet again, unsure of how to reply to your instantaneous combustion; a briefly-lived feeling of worry that he'd add more fuel to the fire.
He couldn't reveal the reason to you. He'd given Dumbledore his word that he would not speak of Lupin's condition. In fact, Snape had doubted Dumbledore's usually-wise judgement when he mentioned that he'd hired Lupin. The Potions Master thought the Headmaster had gone mad for openly inviting a werewolf into Hogwarts, let alone allowing him to teach classes full of children. And then, he'd found himself roped into producing the Wolfsbane potion so Lupin could keep his wretched condition of Lycanthropy at bay. Snape still doubted the whole idea. He knew it was doomed from the very beginning. Balancing the safety of Hogwarts on the constant, perfect production of a potion and the hope that Lupin was competent enough to remember to take it each day of the preceding week of a full moon?
Doomed, Snape thought.
Despite your best efforts of attempting to force the answer out of Snape, he knew you'd figure it out sooner or later once you noticed which ingredients he'd be borrowing from you. He had faith that you were smart enough to work it out. So, he stood straighter in front of you, wordlessly giving you his answer as he turned around to walk away from you.
No.
"A warm, warm welcome back to you all!" Dumbledore's raspy voice boomed through the Great Hall, the applause from students and staff alike to quickly quietening down. You were seated comfortably between McGonagall and Hagrid, and it felt awfully similar to last year. Just a year ago, you had no idea what you were strapping yourself in for. "Before we indulge ourselves in this delectable feast, I'd like to welcome Professor RJ Lupin, who will be the new Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher," Dumbledore said, turning around to gesture to Lupin with eccentric, wrinkly hands. The professor stood up goofily with anxiously-clasped hands, giving a grateful nod to the Hall as they applauded him. He caught your eye, and you sent him an encouraging smile, ignoring Snape's distasteful face beside Lupin.
"Good luck, professor! Now, our teacher for the Care of Magical Creatures for many years, has decided to retire in order to spend more time with his remaining limbs. Fortunately, I'm delighted to announce that his place will be taken than none other than our own, Rubeus Hagrid!" The Headmaster announced as he spun around to gesture to the half-man-half-giant sat happily beside you, a genial smile spreading across the Dumbledore's face. Applause and whoops erupted in the Hall once more as Hagrid gave a short nod and a cheerful smile to the hooting crowd. You rolled your eyes and elbowed him, prompting him to stand up, his large belly shoving the table forwards with a sharp screech; a handful of glass goblets falling over and smashing. McGonagall looked up at the newly-appointed professor rather disappointedly before eyes her goblet that now laid shattered before her.
"Finally, on a more describing note, at the request of the Ministry of Magic, Hogwarts will until further notice play host to the dementors of Azkaban, until such a time Sirius Black is captured." Dumbledore said, a stern and serious tone taking place of his usual reserved one. Gods, how could you have forgotten? Mass murderer Sirius Black was still on the loose. Apparently the thought of Snape was enough to distract you from a highly important news article. And now, one of the most feared creatures of the Wizarding World was going to be lingering around Hogwarts? This was not what you signed up for. Your teeth started to chew against the inside of your bottom lip anxiously.
"Will they be on the school grounds?" You whispered to Minerva beside you, failing miserably at trying to hide the shaky fear within your voice. She instantly looked at you, smiling softly. You'd always had a phobia of dementors, and now the fact that they were going to be lurking around the school had put you on edge. Merlin, can this year get any worse?
"I'm not sure, my dear." Minerva replied to you quietly, subtly noticing the fear swimming in your eyes. The older witch placed a hand upon yours in an attempt to soothe your anxiety. "There's nothing to worry about, I assure you." You merely nodded at her, unbelieving. Nothing to worry about, sure. It's not like some savage, minacious murderer is on the loose.
"The dementors willl be stationed at every entrance to the grounds." There goes your sanity. "Now, whilst I've been assured that their presence will not disrupt our day-to-day activities, a word of caution: dementors are vicious creatures. They will not distinguish between the one they hunt, and the one who gets in their way." You hated the way that Dumbledore spoke of the dementors, and it hardly settled your trembling and anxious mind. No, in fact, it bloody well worsened it. The old man was basically saying if you get in their way, it's a death sentence. They have no sense to decide whether you're a threat or not, or they just don't care.
Either way, you were screwed. You could not produce a Patronus charm, let alone a corporeal one, and it was something that played on your mind a lot. You could never find the right memory to do so. Every happy memory you flicked through in your mind, it just wasn't happy enough. So, if you came into contact with a dementor, you were, let's say, royally fucked. Was your life that sad?
"Therefore, I must warn each and every one of you, give them no reason to harm you. It is not in the nature of a dementor to be forgiving. But, you know, happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, when one only remembers to turn on the light." The Headmaster finished with a cryptic riddle, making you sigh a little heavier than expected, catching an intrigued look from Hagrid. Sorry, but what the fuck does that even mean, Dumbledore? You were well aware that Dumbledore was undoubtedly an ingenious and powerful wizard, but sometimes, the things that came out of his mouth just sounded like nonsense. Maybe he just said those random things to keep up his mysterious act.
As you looked up from the nervous, fidgeting fingers in your lap, your eyes locked with that same pair of black, emotionless ones that were staring so deeply into yours just last night. Immediately, you looked away, your cheeks flushing red out of embarrassment, and perhaps, suppressed affection. There was that weighty feeling of guilt again, finding your shoulders once more. Ben's smiling face materialised in your mind as you shut your eyes, attempting to rid yourself of the buzzing feeling that Snape had awakened within you. With just one look into his eyes, you were melting back into your old ways.
You heard the creaking of a chair shift beside you as a gentle mass poked your side. "A'right down there?" Hagrid questioned quietly, noticing your subtle change in demeanour. You were suddenly stiff in your seat.
"Yeah, yeah, fine thanks, Hagrid." You cleared your throat, avoiding those two addicting pools of inky-black.
"Hmm." Hagrid hummed beside you, obviously skeptical about your curt response. He let his eyes flick to where you were previously looking, his stomach sinking as he spotted the broody cause of your sudden mood change. Hagrid didn't bother pressing you for answers, he knew you had enough on your plate, and he would rather you come to him. The last time you spoke about your problems regarding Snape, you were in tears, or you would burst into tears, there wasn't really an inbetween.
Silently, you were thankful that the newly-appointed professor beside you chose to keep shtum.
As you glanced back to where Snape sat, he was completely avoiding your eyes too, however, as you continued looking over in his direction, the wave of a hand beside the Potions Master caught your eye. Flicking your gaze to the right, you noticed it was Lupin waving sheepishly at you, a kind smile tugging at his scarred lips. You returned his smile and waved back, turning to the professors beside you as he glanced away from you.
"Professor Lupin seems to be a kind soul." You commented outloud, a genial smile upon your lips. McGonagall glanced at you, eyeing your curiously.
"Yes," She agreed slowly, her eyes gently dissecting you. "Have you met before?"
"No, I just bumped into him a couple nights ago, by my door."
"Yer' door?" Hagrid repeated in an octave higher than usual, intrigued.
"He just happened to be there when I walked out." You frowned, wide eyes looking up at the gigantic man, trying to understand what he was insinuating.
"Right, right." Hagrid quickly said, almost awkwardly as his cheeks reddened a tad, averting his eyes from your suspicious ones. Minerva's lips quirked into a small, amused smirk as she glanced between you and Hagrid. "Well, this food looks delicious, ay?" He cleared his throat, raising his brows as he glanced down at your plates that were now burdened with a generous amount of steaming hot meat and vegetables. You couldn't help but laugh softly to yourself at Hagrid's awkwardness. It was sweet to you.
Before you let yourself indulge in the plate full of food in front of you, you dared to look in the direction of a certain gloomy individual. Snape had already begun to eat, which surprised you. He usually takes a few bites and retires to his office, but this time, he'd stayed. You frowned to yourself as you stared at him, observing the glum way he kept to himself, avoiding any kind of conversation. Once more, you found yourself yearning for him. And yet again, your heart and mind were telling you two different things.
"Isn't that a Mimbulus Mimbletonia plant, professor?" Came Neville Longbottom's curious voice, his inquisitive eyes dragging over the plant you held cautiously in your arms. A cheery smile graced your lips as you nodded at the boy.
"Yes, indeed it is, Mr Longbottom." You said proudly, inducing a thrilled smile from Neville. "Can anyone tell me what it's uses are?" You asked, glancing around your greenhouse at mostly confused faces. You had an inkling that none of them would know the answer, perhaps apart from Hermione or Neville, who you noticed seemed to excel in Herbology. Though, Hermione wasn't in your class this morning. So to you, it was all down to Neville.
"Stinksap, right?" Neville answered quickly, his bunny-like teeth sticking out from underneath his top lip as he stared at you, awaiting your reply.
"Correct, and what can we use stinksap for?" You questioned, your smile widening at Neville. A sense of accomplishment suddenly tickled your body - maybe your students were listening to you and learning. You were a little worried that you hadn't exactly made an impact on them. As you got lost in your fretting thoughts, a light voice you weren't familiar with caught your attention. You turned towards the dark-haired girl, her deep blue eyes lighting up with confidence as she retrieved you from the abyss that you unfortunately called your mind.
"Stinksap can be used in certain potions as it contains very good healing properties," Alisa Arumina spoke up, earning a tilt of your head. You nodded at her, encouraging the girl to continue. "However, you have to be extra cautious when handling such a plant as this one since it will squirt out rather rancid smelling sap. Hence the name, stinksap." She finished, a sheepish smile upon her lips. You grinned proudly at her.
"Yes, lovely! Ten points to Ravenclaw, Miss Arumina." You carefully placed the plant down upon the table you were all gathered around. Before you could continue on to explain how to care for it, a distraught sounding voice called from behind you, at the door to your greenhouse.
"Professor L/N," Madam Pomfrey called out, her voice shaky. Immediately, you spun around with a worried frown upon your face. She sighed. "There's been an accident, do you have any mature Mandrakes ready for use? A Wiggenweld potion is required at once." Madam Pomfrey's eyes looked afraid. This must be serious, what the hell happened? You thought as your heart began to anxiously pick up in pace.
"Err," You stumbled over your words, blinking quickly. "Yes, yes, of course. I'll have them delivered to you immediately." You nodded in a poor attempt to assure the terrified look upon Madam Pomfrey's face. It didn't work.
"I'm afraid Professor Snape has asked for you to go to him right away." She said regretfully. Of course he fucking did, you groaned inwardly. 
"Is it so hard for you to come and retrieve the Mandrakes yourself?" You demanded as you burst through Snape's classroom door, your irked eyes finding Snape's startled ones. Though, just as quickly as he had looked startled by your sudden entry to his room, he had returned back to his usual angry glare, shooting it directly at you.
"Is it so hard for you to knock before entering?" Snape grunted at you, rubbing his fingers in circles against his temples. He lifted a hand and patted the empty space on his desk beside him. "Place the mandrakes here." You scrunched up your nose at him in disgust,
"I'll put them there once you tell me what the hell is going on."
"Your dear friend, Professor Rubeus Hagrid, thought it wise to introduce the children to a hippogriff on their first lesson together." Snape sneered as he rose from his desk in a slow and intimidating manner, his hands splayed out across the deeply grooved, dark wood surface. "I knew he was an oaf, but I at least thought he had retained some form ofhuman intelligence. Perhaps even common sense!" He exclaimed, his brows glued together in fury. Your brows mirrored his own as he insulted your friend. "A student was injured, Professor L/N, a student of my house." Ah, so that's why he's so upset. "Draco Malfoy." Riiight, it's adding up now, you thought, your anger simmering down slightly at the utterance of a student being injured.
You knew Hagrid wasn't incompetent, he was smart enough to not put students in the way of danger, but maybe this was a very big mistake. Perhaps he was too... eager. A hippogriff is a highly dangerous animal, especially if the students are not taught how to approach one beforehand. A strained sigh left your nostrils as you clenched your jaw, averting your eyes from a fuming Snape.
"Is he alright?" You asked, hesitating. "Hopefully he didn't lose a limb..." You muttered whilst perching yourself down upon a stool to your right.
"By the grace of the gods, Malfoy's arm was merely scratched," Snape seethed, clearly still very angry. Maybe it'd be best if you just left now, you did leave your class unsupervised for this visit. The thought of being a hypocrite niggled at your mind as you thought back to the time you'd chastised Lockhart for doing the same thing. But, this wasn't the same thing right? This was urgent, his was... whatever, you're better than that babbling, bumbling baboon anyway.
"So, it wasn't even a big injury...?" You repeated, frowning. "A little... scratch and you're almost losing your hair over it?"
"I think you're missing the point, Professor L/N, as always," Snape scoffed at you, earning a resentful glare from your eyes. "Hagrid has proved himself to be incapable of handling a class safely. I mean, a student injured and sent to the hospital on the very first lesson? Seems like a bad omen, if I do say so myself."
"Oh, please, Snape," A frustrated, heavy sigh left your nostrils again as you glanced to the side. "It's his first day!" You laughed incredulously, defending your friend. Sure, Hagrid might have misjudged this lesson by a smidge, however, you knew he would never put students in harms way.
"His first day, and his incompetency has resulted in injury!" Snape replied bitterly. He clearly didn't like Hagrid, and it was very obvious. He only ever spoke bad about the man, and it angered you. Hagrid was more than just an... 'oaf'. "Those... beasts... should have never been allowed at Hogwarts, regardless." Snape's nose crinkled in disgust.
"Give him the benefit of the doubt!" You cried out at Snape hopelessly. "And Buckbeak is a perfectly good hippogriff, you have no idea what you're talking about."
"How would you know that?" Snape's lips curled up into a distasteful sneer once again. Your cheeks ran hot as rage boiled beneath them at his comment.
"Because I know Buckbeak, Snape," You seethed at him with your fists balled, "Buckbeak would never do such a thing unless he felt threatened or insulted!" A hand flew up to wipe at your face, your breathing becoming ragged and hopeless. As you glanced back at Snape, he paused for a moment, his lips curling into an amused, incredulous smirk at your words. He couldn't believe what had just fallen from your mouth. Did he hear you correctly? Were you truly so delusional?
"You 'know' Buckbeak? Don't be absurd, Y/N." Snape huffed at you, his eyes narrowing as the corners of his lips tugged downwards disdainfully. "Buckbeak is a wild creature, it is hopelessly foolish of you to believe you can understand, much less, tame one!" He said, strained, his knuckles turning white from the aggressive, vice-like grip he had on his desk.
"These creatures are deeper than you think, Snape," you frowned, eyes stormy and reckless, unknowingly searching for trouble. His long fingers flew up to massage the bridge of his nose, clearly growing more fed up by the second. "Perhaps you'd understand if you had a heart within that empty chest of yours." A curt, exasperated sigh tore from your nostrils. Though, before you could take back your words, a blanket of regret wrapped itself around your seething body, your once-stormy eyes widening a tad as the realisation of what you had just uttered began to seep in. The sudden silence in the room was unbearably thick.
Snape's eyebrow twitched as he raised his head. Slowly, he fixed you with a dark, scrutinising gaze, rendering you speechless. Your body froze. "Bold, today, are we?" Snape's deep, stinging voice cut through the quietness like razors, reaching your ears like a thousand sharp pins.
You didn't answer him, fearing you might provoke him further. You'd never seen him like this. Dark, unnerved, fervent. It was terrifying to you. Perhaps you did cross the line. Gods, what had you done? Couldn't you have just brought the Mandrakes and sodded off? Jesus.
Snape marched towards you without a word, his cloak billowing out behind him like a flag. You couldn't help but notice the fury emanating from every single inch of his body, prompting your cheeks to flare up in a wild, raging blush. You had no time to defend yourself from Snape's long, cold and slender fingers as they clutched your jaw in force, shooting a frightening yet delicious shiver down your spine. A soft surprised gasp escaped your throat as he pushed you off of the stool you were sat on, a loud bang breaking through the silence as it clattered to the floor. Your back was instantaneously pressed against the table behind you as Snape shoved your backwards from the hold of your jaw, your eyes pooling with sudden panic as his fingers tightened against your skin, bound to leave marks. Fearfully, the palms of your hands flew to steady yourself against the edge of the table he'd rammed you against; your back arched painfully as he leaned right into your face, a spine-chilling scowl adopting his features.
The two of you were mere inches away from each other. Snape bared his teeth at you in a sneer, almost like he was revolted by your presence. He let his thumb slip upwards from your chin to the skin just beneath your bottom lip, pressing it against your teeth. Your eyes were forced to stare into his, his ones cold and penetrating in a way that only Snape's could be. Your heart was pounding so loud in your ears that at this point that you were afraid you'd go deaf. 
Both of your chests heaved laboriously, leaning against one another, like you'd just sprinted for a mile without stopping for a break. As you stared into Snape's threatening eyes, you felt your body numb, his signature scent of sweet wine, books and smoke invading your nose like it was nothing. Against your will, your body welcomed it and you felt yourself relapsing from the addicting smell. With wild eyes locked together, you saw something else swimming in his wicked, black eyes. They almost looked pained, helpless, maybe even like they were... yearning? Your eyes flicked over his face gradually, slowly drinking him in. Whilst the two of you stared at each other, trapped between one another's body, a fluttering sensation slowly materialised in your gut, prompting your eyes to fall to Snape's angry, quivering lips. The undeniable urge to press your lips against his own was scratching at you like a desperate caged animal. You inhaled sharply and blinked, averting your hungry eyes back to his own, distracting yourself from such thoughts. Again, you found yourself lost in him.
Before you even had a chance to look deeper, Snape's bone-chilling voice tore you from your thoughts. You felt as if he'd noticed you spotting something deeper lingering within him.
"Get. Out." Snape spat, roughly releasing you from his grip, your hand flying up to soothe your aching jaw. You stood there, your arched back and splayed out hands against the edge of the wooden table, flabbergasted. Snape stalked back to his desk acting like the previous minute did not just happen. For once, you obliged and stood up straight, your feet immediately rushing forwards to carry yourself out of Snape's classroom in absolute silence, face blank with shock. As you shut the door behind you, you paused in your footsteps for a moment, eyes locked absentmindedly on the cobblestone ground in front of you.
What the fuck had just happened? Can the two of you no longer have normal interactions? You always have to be at each other's throats each time?
Your fingers lifted up to your face and traced where Snape's fingertips had been pressed into the skin on your jaw, a dull soreness emitting from the area as you touched it. That's definitely going to leave a mark.
Fuck.
You just hoped Ben didn't visit you for another week or so. There was absolutely no way you could explain this without it seeming super fucking suspicious. Oh jeez, Ben. How were you meant to face him when you'd just been on the verge of kissing Snape? It was just in the heat of the moment, obviously... Was it? Did he feel it too? No, of course he didn't, he looked like he wanted to kill you.
A frustrated groan bubbled in your throat as you stomped away from Snape's classroom door, heading back to your class.
Merlin, were you fucked.
Part 9!
hey guys.... i hope you enjoyed this part, i apologise again for how long it took me omfg. i'm ashamed. :( i just couldn't get the creative juices flowing, then i got covid (which im still battling). like bruh give me a BREAK PLEASE.
anyway, i already have part 9 planned out so i'm hoping it wont be as long to type up!! <3 love you guys.
please let me know what you thought!! also what are your patronuses if you have one?! mine is a snowy owl :)
taglist: (i hope i haven't missed anyone or added anyone by accidient!! if i have i'm sorry and please tell me!!)
@a-laufeyson
@emilynissangtr
@livillain00
@meowskii
@nooneeveryonenoone
@vesperbatty
@biggest-simp-eversposts
@881127fara
@freshmoneyalmondathlete
@sonoluvr22
@v3lv3tvampir3
@lashipperrubia
@camilla-black
@acakius
@hiddlestonspassionsackx
@tellatubbies
@mikariell95
@sunshinemink
@m0rtifiedg0th
@spookymicrowave
@sayonara30
@novas-dreamworld
@ms-snape
@captainrogers-19
@allygranger
@nataliewalker93
447 notes · View notes
theemporium · 1 year
Note
Auror!reader goes to Azkaban to drop off a prisoner and her curiosity about what happened to her (ex, but they never broke up) gets the best of her, so she goes up to Sirius’ cell.
this was such a good idea! thank you for requesting!🖤
.
The temptation had always been there, every single time you visited the prison.
You just never had the guts to act upon it.
Aurors never visited Azkaban anyways, at least not the ones that were usually out in the field like yourself. You were more busy jumping from case to case than to worry about guard rotations on transferring prisoners to the hellhole they would spend the rest of their pathetic lives in. 
However, this prisoner was deemed a high risk and the Ministry wanted all hands on deck to get him to the prison, which meant a usual Tuesday out on the streets of London instead became a prison visit. 
The job itself was easily done. You didn’t have much hassle and the dementors were civil enough to work with as you deposited the prisoner into his new cell, not bothering to listen to the curses and threats he spat your way. 
You had no reason to linger in the prison any longer but something was tugging in your gut, something that was whispering today is the day. 
The question had blurted from your mouth before you could even stop yourself. 
“Which cell holds Sirius Black?” 
You knew the looks your colleagues were giving you were odd and you knew, undoubtedly, it would be gossip in the office for the next few weeks until something more interesting came about but you couldn’t help yourself. 
You had thanked the guard who gave you the information and promptly nodded to your colleagues, telling them you’d make your own way back before you headed through the windy, cold staircases of the prison until you reached where you wanted. 
You stood outside the door for five minutes, unable to move as you stared at the number. You were too far to look in through the small gap in the door. You didn’t even know what to do when you saw him. You had let your gut lead you this far and now you were alone, unsure what to do. 
“Go away, Gus, it’s not funny when you just stand out there!” A voice from inside the cell called out and something in your chest tightened at the voice you hadn’t heard in months—not since he had been thrown in this cell. 
“It’s not Gus,” was all you said and everything froze. 
At first, Sirius thought he was hallucinating the voice. That he had imagined it all like he had done in the first few weeks of isolation. But then he was scrambling up to his feet and making his way to the door to peek through the small gap and— 
You were there. 
“Darling.” 
Your chest tightened further when you saw his face through the bars. “Sirius.” 
Neither one of you said anything, both just taking in the presence of each other. You hadn’t been with Sirius the night of Halloween, instead out on a mission for your department. When you came back, you didn’t find him in your shared apartment anymore, but instead were told he had been locked away in Azkaban for the rest of his life after the crimes he committed. 
You never got the chance to say goodbye. 
You never got the chance to say anything. 
“I—“ you opened your mouth to speak but you didn’t know what to say. You thought you knew him, you thought you knew your Sirius. 
But it was hard to remember him when you knew the man in front of you ratted out and practically killed two of your closest friends. 
“I wasn’t the secret keeper,” he eventually said and suddenly everything came to a screeching halt. 
You frowned. “What?” 
“I was never the secret keeper,” he breathed out, like a weight had been lifted off his chest for the first time in months. “James—“ A wince of pain passed across his face before he continued. “James never told me. I was never the secret keeper. He said it would be too obvious.” 
To the world, James Potter trusted no one but Sirius Black—his closest friend—with his location. 
To the world, it could’ve been no one but Sirius Black. 
“Who was it then?” you asked, a bite to your words because a bitter part of you wondered if he was just playing with you. 
“Peter,” he sneered. “Peter was the fucking rat. He came after he told that bastard and—“
“You can’t expect me to believe you,” you snapped at him. “Peter is dead.” The words felt bitter on your tongue. 
“I’m sure he fucking is,” Sirius scoffed before shaking his head. “You know me, love. You know me. I would’ve never…he…he was my brother.” 
And some part of you, deep down, knew he was telling the truth. Or maybe you just wanted to believe him. You weren’t quite sure yourself. 
“You’ve locked up the wrong person,” Sirius whispered, his voice breaking as he looked at you with glossy eyes. “He’s still out there.” 
You shook your head. “We found his remains, Sirius.”
“All of him?” Sirius questioned and it made you pause. 
You didn’t say anything. 
Sirius scoffed. “Of course not. Because he’s still alive. The fucker is still alive.”
“I should’ve never come here,” you murmured as you turned on your heel, already walking down the corridor as he called out to you. 
“YOU KNOW I AM RIGHT! YOU KNOW I AM TELLING THE TRUTH, DARLING!” 
And the worst part was that he was right. You did believe him to an extent, you believed that there was more to the story on the events that took place on that Halloween night. 
And you promised yourself you’d work out what happened, even if it meant uncovering the ugly truth of your ex-boyfriend or discovering that he truly was an innocent man in shackles.
.
461 notes · View notes
aithusarosekiller · 2 months
Text
Do you think Sirius ever carried the foolish hope that his brother was alive?
We know he sees him as a stupid brainwashed kid more than anything, so do you think than in the back of his mind he has the childish hope that maybe he's okay. Maybe he's out there somewhere, living his life far away from the second war as a reformed man
Maybe he looked for him in streets and windows when he broke free from Azkaban, not even realising what he was doing.
Like everyone else, he adopts the impression that Voldemort caught him trying to run away and made an example of him, but there was no solid evidence to make him 100% on that, so he very well could have had doubts that he crushed down into the back of his mind and put down to foolishness. It wasn't like James of Lily where he saw their bodies or Marlene and Dorcas where he'd heard the recounts of their deaths. All they ever would've heard is that he'd gone missing, the rest was deduction- but what if they were wrong? What if their assumption was incorrect?
Do you think he looked extra carefully at every person he crossed just incase his brother was there? He's lost both of his brothers once before; if he could get one of them back it would've fixed a bit of the tear his soul
While he's sitting in his cell, he imagines his brother waiting at home for him to come back so he can apologise and promise never to side with voldemort again. When he gets out and can't find him, he carefully curates the idea of him living a quiet life in the French suburbs, unaware of the conflict and chaos in England and perfectly safe from the world. Nobody would ever call it plausible but it keeps him going nonetheless
When he feels himself dying in the department of mysteries, he pleads that his silly hope was wrong, that all along, Regulus truly was dead. That way, he'd be able to reunite with both of his brothers after all.
121 notes · View notes
dreamcubed · 9 months
Text
back to black | regulus black x reader
song; back to black [amy winehouse] pairing; regulus black x fem!gryffindor!half-blood!reader genre; s2l, angst, hurt comfort word count; 6,3k timeline; marauders' era warnings; swearing, implied child abuse, discrimination (of muggles and muggle-borns), references to war, references to death(s) summary; autumn was your favourite season of all time, and not even your lack of mother or friendships could ruin it for you. but, maybe a brooding boy in your year could
this took me fucking forever but here it is!! and a merry christmas to all who celebrate <33
masterlist
"you went back to what you knew."
————————————
Back to black.
Well, technically, as the first time you had only had black hair for a matter of hours before your mother scolded you for dyeing it and made you change it back. But, she was dead now, and you were about to enter the year of OWL exams at Hogwarts, so a change was well overdue.
You gazed down at your black-stained hands: the muggle way of hair dyeing had been the most spiteful way to do it. After all, your mother hated anything muggle, even though she was merely half-blood herself. Part of you suspected it was because your father was a muggle and broke her heart, but you would never be able to confirm that, since you knew nothing about the man.
With a sigh, you glanced into the mirror and observed the wet black mess on your head. It was certainly going to stain your forehead and neck.
"Fuckin' Azkaban," you murmured, noticing the stains all over the sink and floor. Maybe you should have just done it the magic way.
Well, the stains were nothing a little magic couldn't fix: you didn't care that you weren't seventeen yet, after all.
***
Quite honestly, you adored the fact that school started in Autumn, your absolute favourite season. Nothing hit the spot like a Jack O'Lantern spice latte, fresh from the kitchens of Hogwarts. You had discovered the secret entrance to it a few years back, and come by to make requests frequently.
You tightly held the warm drink as you hurried back to the Gryffindor common room before curfew hit, where no friends were waiting for you. You had always felt out of place in the red house, and had never successfully made a friend in it, let alone the other houses. They all had their distinctive groups, while you were simply an outcast. Nonetheless, you did love how Autumnal the Gryffindor colour scheme was.
Ignoring everyone who was still downstairs, you headed up to the dormitories, where you sat down on your bed and chewed on your lip for a few moments. You weren't sure what to do with yourself.
***
Regulus Black was the quiet and brooding boy in your potions, defence against the dark arts, transfiguration - and actually every class apart from divination. That didn't surprise you, as even though you had never spoken to him, he didn't strike you as a particularly spiritual man. All you really knew about him was that his older brother, the renowned Sirius Black, was in your house - and they did not get along.
He was the only person who you shared so many classes with, and that was the solitary reason that you had noticed him. Well, that and his strikingly powerful presence.
You wondered if he realised you shared so many classes together.
Probably not, though. To make up for your lack of friendships, you intensely observed the people around you, trying to pretend as if you knew them and could predict how a conversation would go with them. It was a fun game for someone so deprived as yourself, even more so when you somehow ended up in conversation with someone and got to find out how accurate in your predictions you were.
But you also loved when you were completely wrong about a person.
"A new hair colour, I see, Miss L/N," Professor McGonagall said to you as you entered the first transfiguration lesson of the year.
You nodded, "Felt I needed a change."
The witch gave you a pitiful look that made you sick to your stomach: you hated the fact that people felt the need to tread on egg shells around you because of your mother's death. You weren't upset about it - you hated the woman.
"Black suits you," she said simply, the very same second Regulus Black entered the room.
He looked up, clearly thinking his name had been called.
"Not you, Mr Black," McGonagall waved her hand dismissively, "I was referring to Miss L/N's new hair colour."
For the first time ever, you were pretty sure, Regulus Black looked in your direction and made eye contact with you. His cold grey eyes pierced through you, as if he suddenly knew every secret about you - which he didn't, you had read about legilimency and it didn't feel like that. Just as quickly as he looked at you, he looked away again, and took a seat at the back of the classroom.
You felt a shiver run up your spine - an itching, chilly sensation, that made you feel positively thrilled.
"Everyone, please take your seats," McGonagall said as the class filled up.
You looked around, noticing a few empty spots, but most prominently the space next to Regulus Black at the back of the room. Your feet were taking you towards it before your mind could kick into action, and even though you were convinced that he was glaring at you, you kept your eyes trained on to the professor as you sat down.
"This year in transfiguration, we will cover..."
McGonagall's voice faded into background noise as you became hyper aware of the boy's presence next you, whilst simultaneously doing everything in your power to make it seem like your attention was not on him but instead the lesson.
What had become of you?
***
Smudged eyeliner and a maroon knitted jumper, cold peppermint tea and torn parchment; your mind felt frantic yet empty, gazing out the window of the Gryffindor common room. Starless nights and rain against glass, blazing fire and crackling flames; you couldn't see anything outside, so you couldn't quite piece together why your eyes remained fixed on the blackness.
A sigh pushed through your lips, picking up the tea to take a sip - only for it to go down reluctantly, due to its chilly temperature. Had it really been that long since you zoned out?
Another sigh escaped you as you rose to your feet. You were the only person who remained in the Gryffindor common room, so you estimated that it was at least midnight. Definitely way too late to venture into the rest of the castle: if you cared about punishment, that was.
Pulling out your wand from your dark-washed jeans, you pushed open the portrait of the Fat Lady and muttered a soft, "Lumos," into the corridor. You anticipated the scream of the painted woman asking where you were headed at such an hour, but at the lack of you turned around and saw that she was presently vacated from her usual spot. Hopefully she would have returned by the time you got back.
You knew the way to the kitchens like the back of your hand, but you rarely took it so late, way past curfew. You were, of course, cautious. It would be insane not to be in an enchanted castle such as Hogwarts, which also happened to be haunted.
Your gut sensed another presence before any of your typical five senses did: lurching as it indicated that you were not alone. You quickly whispered, "Nox," and ducked into an alcove, focusing all your energy into your sense of hearing. Delicate - very delicate - footsteps. So faint you almost thought that you were hallucinating.
They stopped right by you, and you heard a soft breath.
Why did it sound so achingly familiar, yet not like any professor's?
"Who's there?"
Regulus Black.
You stepped out from the alcove and into the light of his wand, crossing your arms in the process. Regulus took one look at you and sighed.
"What do you want, Gryffindor?"
"I have a name," you muttered, "And I would like to think you know it."
He raised an eyebrow at you, and you scowled.
"I want nothing from you, Black, I merely thought you were a teacher."
He seemed to mull over your words for a few seconds, ultimately deciding that there was no way it was anything but the truth before saying, "Very well."
The question itched on your tongue. "What are you doing?"
In the dimmed light, you could only just make out the way he pressed his tongue into his cheek, a bit more aggressively than you would hope for.
"That's none of your concern."
You narrowed your eyes, "I'm pretty sure the last time someone said that, a girl ended up dead in the toilets."
"You-" Regulus cut himself off at the sound of loud, purposeful footsteps echoing down the hallway. He muttered, "Shit," before dimming his wand light and pulling you back into the alcove with him.
You held your breath as the footsteps increased in volume, almost unaware of your hand pressed against Regulus' abdomen, and his arm wrapped around your waist.
"Are you sure he was headed this way, Mrs Norris?" the unfortunate voice of Filch asked, followed by a scratchy meow.
You pursed your lips as the footsteps got quieter, only letting yourself breathe once there was complete silence again. Still, you and Regulus remained in position for a few more seconds.
"I think the coast is clear," you murmured.
"Hm? Oh, yeah," Regulus replied distractedly, slipping out of the alcove and letting his arm drop from your waist. You hadn't noticed the warmth that much, but you definitely noticed the lack of it.
"Guess Filch is on to you," you said, to fill the silence more than anything else - which was weird, as you had never been bothered by lack of conversation before.
"Bastard," Regulus replied. Maybe it wasn't a reply, but an unrelated yet relevant comment.
You lit your wand again, and turned to continue on your journey, "I'm going to the kitchens, in case you were wondering," you had hoped it would prompt him to admit to his activities, but he simply remained silent, "You can come if you want."
You had no explanation for adding that last part.
It was obvious that Regulus' first instinct had been to say no, but he must have come to the conclusion that there was really nowhere else to go while Filch was headed off on a rampage towards his original destination. So, he sighed instead, and began trailing behind you towards the fruit bowl portrait.
"Peppermint tea, Miss L/N?" the house elf nearest to you asked after you entered the magnificent kitchens, which were remarkably similar to the Great Hall.
"Actually, I think I'll take a hot chocolate, thank you," you replied, sitting down at the end of one of the four long tables. It was too late for your preferred latte, after all.
"And you, Mr Black?" another house elf asked.
It was evident that Regulus was startled that the creature knew his name, "Americano. Black, no sugar."
You weren't surprised at his request.
"Do you have a house elf?" you asked, as you knew that the Black family was pure-blooded and wealthy.
He gave a curt nod, which you took as a hint that he wasn't interested in conversation. Luckily, the house elves quickly whipped up the hot drinks and placed them in two forest green mugs in front of you.
To your surprise, he asked a question.
"How do you know about this place?"
You shrugged, "I followed the Marauders here one night."
Regulus drew back, and you realised then what a mistake mentioning the infamous quartet was: Sirius Black was clearly a sour topic.
Regardless, you still mumbled, "I think they knew I was there."
He chuckled dryly, "Probably."
"How are you gonna sleep?" you changed the subject, gesturing towards his steaming coffee.
"I won't."
You didn't press that matter further, either. But it was then that you noticed the dark circles under his eyes, sallow and zombie-like. Yet they suited him, enhanced his eery yet attractive looks, which was probably why you hadn't registered them before. They didn't appear out of place.
"Why don't you have a red mug?" Regulus asked, taking you by surprise. He was gazing at the wall display of mugs, sorted into the four house colours.
"Miss L/N doesn't like the red mugs," a house elf piped up, placing a tray of cookies in between the two of you.
"But it's your house colour."
You sipped slowly on your hot chocolate, stewing over the words you could potentially say. "I... don't like being a Gryffindor. I've never felt like I belonged."
"I don't like Gryffindors."
You scoffed, "Never would've guessed."
He raised an eyebrow.
"All Slytherins hate us."
"Yeah, because you're Dumbledore's favourite."
You shrugged.
"That and you allow mudbloods."
You paused in your movements, "So do Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff, yet you don't go on a rampage against them."
"Point taken."
The school hot chocolate was delicious, you decided, and you should really have it more.
"What's your blood status?"
You shrugged, "Half-blood."
"I'm-"
"Pure-blood, I know," you sighed, "Even if the Black family weren't a so-called noble house, I would've guessed from your comments earlier."
He stared at you: a piercing, icy glare that almost made a shiver run up your spine. Almost.
"Do you really enjoy leading such a hateful life?"
His mouth parted, before he carefully swallowed and avoided eye contact, "It's not about hatred, it's about what's right."
"And what's right is abusing muggle-borns, even though they were born wizards and witches just like us?"
Regulus said nothing.
"I think that you need to stop taking Mummy and Daddy's word for what it is," you said mockingly, "You have your own brain, form your own opinions with it."
You watched his jaw clench.
"With that, I will bid you adieu," you said, picking up your hot chocolate and a few cookies, "See you tomorrow."
He didn't say goodbye to you as you left, and you didn't wait for him to.
***
Regulus watched you as you entered transfiguration the next day: you felt it before you saw his eyes glued on to you. You ignored his attentions, still sitting next to him but making no effort to engage in conversation. He made no effort either, eventually peeling his eyes away from you when McGonagall arrived to begin the lesson.
In fact, no words were exchanged between the two of you until the very end of the hour.
"I think you're wrong," he muttered.
You looked down at your parchment, furrowing your eyebrows at the answer that you were pretty sure was correct. "It's not animagi?"
"Not about that," he clarified, "About mudbloods."
You exhaled sharply through your nose.
"They aren't worthy."
"You're insufferable," you said quietly, "The existence of muggle-borns doesn't affect you, leave them alone."
"It affects the culture of wizards and witches, which affects me."
"Maybe the culture needs changing," you spat back, "Godric knows you do."
Regulus didn't reply, and you made no further attempt to talk to him.
Not for the rest of your time at Hogwarts.
***
APPROXIMATELY THREE YEARS LATER: 1979.
***
"I can't seem to face up to the facts..." you sung quietly along to the song as you gazed into the mirror of your bathroom.
"I'm tense and nervous and I can't relax..." it was playing from your record player in your bedroom, just through the open door to your right. Your graduation gift (to yourself) had been a record player, a very pleasant addition to the house that you had inherited from your mother. Especially as she hated all muggle items.
"I can't sleep 'cause my bed's on fire..." It was only three bedrooms, the third being so small it could hardly fit a twin bed in, but the master bedroom was decently sized and had an en suite. And, officially being the master of the house, that bedroom was now yours.
"Don't touch me, I'm a real live wire..." You were dyeing your hair black for the third time in your life.
After dyeing it before fifth year, you had maintained the roots up until Christmas before you went back to your natural colour, and had remained that way up until now. But, you decided that you wanted your raven locks back, and so had stopped by a muggle pharmacy for some black hair dye. There was something therapeutic in doing it manually.
"Psycho killer, qu'est-ce que c'est?" you continued to mumble, finishing up the touches of your hair, just when you heard a heavy knock on your door.
You stilled: nobody came knocking on your door. Your solitary existence remained very solitary.
Grabbing your wand off the counter, you moved into your bedroom and delicately removed the needle from the vinyl, before silently padding downstairs. You crept up to the maroon door and peered through the peephole, fully prepared to yell "stupefy" should you require.
It was the last person you expected - and considering you expected no one, that really said something.
Despite recognising the individual, you were hesitant to open the door, as you knew that said person was a renowned death eater: one of the Dark Lord's loyal followers.
"L/N, please, I know you're there," he croaked, his voice ragged and scratched.
Against your better judgement, you opened the door, only to catch sight of his ripped clothes and dripping wounds. There were bags under his eyes and his hair was longer and messy, and you had absolutely no idea what to do.
"Please, I didn't know where else to go."
You sighed, lowering your wand and stepping back to open the door wide. Godric knows that you would go to hell for helping a death eater like this.
"What happened to you?" you murmured, leading him through to your small galley kitchen. You dug through your cupboards until you found your first aid kit, and then grabbed a flannel and ran it under the hot tap.
Regulus watched you silently.
"Take off your clothes," you muttered, then added, "Except your underwear."
He obliged, and your breath hitched at the gory visuals in front of you.
"Fuckin' Azkaban."
You began cleaning him up, applying a healing potion as you went.
"I should've listened to you."
"Hm?"
"What you said about mud- muggle-borns," his eyes crinkled together, "You-Know-Who- he's... he's..."
"Batshit?" you raised an eyebrow, noting how Regulus avoided his name.
A scratched chuckle came out his throat, "Yeah."
"Did you challenge him to a duel or something?" you asked as you paused your care of him to fetch a glass of water for his throat.
"I'd be dead if I'd done that - no, I've been trying to find his Horcruxes."
"His what?"
Regulus gulped down all of the water before he replied. "There's a reason he's so fearless."
And then came his explanation and story, of how he found out about Voldemort's secret of immortality after realising that he was in the wrong, and had begun hunting down the pieces of his soul in order to destroy him for good. That led on to his explanation of how he ended up in the state he was currently in.
"The locket," he explained, "I went with Kreacher - my house elf - to this cave. I had to drink water that dehydrates you to get to the locket, and the only other water around was in this lake kind of thing. But, of course, it wasn't a normal lake. It was full of inferni."
You mindlessly continued tending to his wounds as you took all of this in.
"They started clawing at me and dragging me in - so I ordered Kreacher to leave with the locket, thinking I wouldn't survive," his voice faltered as he relived the memory, "I don't even know how I did - it's all a blur. But I couldn't go back home, or anywhere I normally go. You-Know-Who knows by now."
"So you came here?" you finally spoke.
"I- yes."
"Even though we hardly know each other."
He stared at you with darkened sorrow in his eyes, and you realised that this was far from the Regulus you knew in Hogwarts.
You sighed, pulling away from him as you finished up with the last of the injuries.
"You're the first person that came to mind," he murmured.
Your eyes flicked to the snake twisting on Regulus' wrist, the permanent sign of devotion to the Dark Lord.
"He's trying to reach me," he muttered, "Is your house well protected?"
You shook your head, "There's no reason they'd come here."
Regulus cursed under his breath, "I'm really sorry to put you in danger, please let me put some protective charms around the place."
You gestured for him to be your guest.
"Am I-"
"Yes, you can stay," you replied. You wouldn't have let him through your door if you hadn't seen the difference in his once cold eyes.
He said nothing, but gave you a look that screamed his thanks as he left through your kitchen door.
***
"He might think you're dead, you know," you said as he came back inside, while you were in the process of laying the table. He had been outside for so long that you had washed out the hair dye from your hair, which was now wet and a bit of a mess.
He didn't reply, so you looked up at his skinny and fatigued figure.
"He probably doesn't think anyone can escape his protective measures."
"Can't take any chances," he eventually murmured, taking a seat, "Thank you for the food."
You gave a small smile, sitting down opposite him. The two of you ate in a companionable silence until Regulus finally said something.
"I won't be here long. I have to continue my search."
You scowled, "No."
He paused, arching an eyebrow, "No?"
"You're in no state to do anything, Black," you said simply, "You'd be fucking useless out there right now."
You watched as Regulus digested your words, "But I can't do nothing."
You shrugged, "You haven't done nothing. I have."
"Yes, but you don't have mistakes to make up for."
The conversation once again flattened to nothing, the odd hint of tension in the air weighing down ever so slightly.
"Why did you do it the muggle way?"
"Hm?"
"Your hair."
"Oh," your eyes widened as you thought carefully, "Mainly to spite my mother."
He tilted his head in confusion.
"She wasn't a very nice woman," you explained, "Shit mother, and she also hated anything muggle. She's dead now, but I do a lot of muggle things to remind myself I'm nothing like her."
"Did she hate muggle-borns?"
You pursed your lips, "Not really, I don't think. Depends how muggle they acted. I've always theorised that my dad was a muggle and broke her heart."
"My parents were awful," Regulus murmured, "When Sirius got sorted into Gryffindor, they gave up on him. But in a way that also made things worse for me, because I was their last chance at the perfect Black heir."
You nodded.
"That's why I resent him so much."
"Maybe one day you two can get along."
He chuckled dryly, "When muggles can do magic."
***
The once sallowed dark aura around Regulus Black had morphed since Hogwarts. It wasn't brighter, that was for sure, you would describe it as a cloudy navy blue - rainy, but not thunderous. Something about him had been replaced and changed, something hard and uncaring, now softer and sympathetic. It wasn't until you were laying in your bed that night with the wind blowing against your window did you realise exactly what it was - he had been traumatised, and thus matured.
Guilt also crept into you from your darkest corners: you had stayed out of the brewing conflict from the death eaters, even though you disagreed with their values. Your cowardice had led you to self-isolate and refuse to fight, bathing in the safety of your half-blood status. Regulus Black showing up on your doorstep was karma if nothing else.
You pulled your maroon quilt further over you and nestled your head into your pillows, trying to crush the lingering sense that your life was only just beginning.
***
The whistle from your kettle blew, filling the kitchen with steam. You let out a yawn as you entered through the archway, and almost jumped when you saw Regulus stood there with two mugs before him. Living alone had been your situation for far too long.
"Good morning," he spoke, but by the strangled way he said it, it was clear that those two words had never left his mouth before, at least not as a pair.
"Morning," you raised an eyebrow, watching as he wandlessly guided the kettle through the air to pour water.
"Milk? Sugar?" he said in question.
"Milk, two sugars."
He hummed in reply, the black shirt that you had lent him clinging to his lean figure. He was skinnier than he should be, that much was obvious, but there was still muscle definition that made your stomach swarm with butterflies. You knew that you had fancied him briefly back in Hogwarts, but you had squandered those feelings when you learned of his political views.
Now he was a changed man, and he was even more attractive than he used to be, and it felt like every butterfly you had crushed had been resurrected all at once. It was overwhelming, and yet the most satisfying experience you had been a part of since the beginning of your dull adulthood.
"Here," he handed you a golden-yellow mug, "I hope it's to your satisfaction."
"Only time will tell," you replied, moving through to the living room.
You sat in a companionable quiet for a while, sipping on your tea and soaking in the ambiance of the morning.
It was when there was almost no liquid left in your mug, and your limbs were growing fidgety, that you felt words race out your mouth before you could think about them. A rushed, perhaps crossing-the-line, statement of, "Stay for a while."
You didn't know whether you meant hours or months.
***
Regulus took a turn for the worse the next day, overcome with vicious fever-like symptoms and ugly coughing fits. The mid-war conditions that you were in made it way too risky to seek professional help, especially as Regulus was a wanted death eater. So, you had no choice but to take care of him to the best of your ability: between herbal teas, homemade soups, leftover cough medicines and cold cloths pressed to his forehead, he seemed to be slowly improving. At least, he wasn't getting worse. But his body was already weakened, so his chances were worse than an average person dealing with whatever he was.
With your hair tied and sleeves pulled up, you ran the white flannel you had been using for Regulus under the cold tap, letting out an exhausted exhale. It had been approximately sixty hours since your guest was bedridden, and you had hardly slept in that time. It was quite difficult to when he would start screaming in the middle of the night during his fever dream episodes.
The pale moonlight slipped through the gaps in your vertical slit blinds, gently illuminating the white china of your bathroom sink, and probably the bags under your eyes as well. Just as you turned off the tap, you heard more screaming from your guest bedroom, so you quickly wrung out the flannel and ran back to Regulus.
"You're okay, you're okay," you murmured, pressing the cloth to his forehead, "You're safe."
His screaming stopped, and you could've sworn his eyes were slightly opened and staring at you through the darkness. "Y/N," he mumbled.
"Yes, Regulus, it's me, Y/N."
You felt his hand grip around the wrist of your hand that held the flannel in place.
"Don't leave me."
"I'm not going anywhere," you spoke gently.
"In sickness and in health..." he muttered, making you chuckle slightly.
Not forgetting the butterflies, of course.
"Yes, Regulus, in sickness and in health."
"You're... amazing..." he sighed, drifting off again into a lax slumber, his hand falling from your wrist.
You softly stroked his cheek, "Get well soon."
***
You had lost track of the days, but you knew that many suns had set and risen by the time Regulus stumbled downstairs one morning, shirtless and still evidently delirious.
"Good morning," you said, observing the man fumbling to sit down in a chair, "Would you like a cup of tea?"
He grunted.
"Feeling better then?" you asked, moving through the archway into the kitchen and setting out two mugs on the counter.
Regulus raked his hands through his hair, grunting again.
"At least you're conscious," you said half to yourself, half to him.
"Date," he said in a scratchy voice, locking his shiny eyes on to yours.
"What's the date?"
He nodded.
You gazed over at the calendar on your wall, only to realise you hadn't been crossing off the days like you typically did ever since Regulus had fallen ill. Sheepishly, you shrugged, "I don't know."
Regulus sighed.
"Sorry, I've hardly slept."
He shook his head, "Don't apologise, it's not your fault."
You didn't bother refuting that. "On the bright side, I know it's been a good few days. I think You-Know-Who would've found you by now if he was looking for you," you said, adding a, "Touch wood," and touching one of your wooden cabinets afterward.
Regulus seemed to ponder that for a moment, "I guess. Thank you for taking care of me."
"I didn't really have a choice," you replied, placing a mug of steamy tea in front of him, "But I'd do it again."
He smiled at you - a tired, but genuine, smile.
"I need to take a long shower, if you don't mind," you sighed, holding your own warm mug, "I feel gross."
"Yeah, you kinda look it."
You went to whack him, "You're one to talk."
He started laughing, which quickly turned into a coughing fit.
"Whoa, whoa, be careful," you said through laughter, "Your lungs can't take much right now."
"I'm fine," he said through splutters, "I swear."
"You should shower after me," you said when he had calmed down, "In the nicest possible way, you need it."
He didn't argue.
***
Rain pounding against the window seemed almost symbolic of the state of the wizarding world as it was: pathetic fallacy, if you will. But, you must admit, your cowardly approach to the war had led you to lead quite a cosy lifestyle in your little cottage, tucked up by fires with hot cups of tea.
At times, you considered joining the resistance, and fighting for what was right. Realistically, though, you couldn't contribute much. Your duelling skills had always been subpar and despite your alleged Gryffindor identity, you lacked courage. Surely the Sorting Hat had made a mistake all those years ago, back when you were a nervous eleven-year-old stood in front of an audience full of older kids.
Never the matter - the past was the past, and as you didn't possess a timeturner, it would have to remain the way it was.
"Something doesn't feel right," Regulus' voice made you jump out of your skin.
Ignoring your surprise, he sat next to you on the sofa.
"You don't think?"
"No," he shook his head. It had been a couple months since he showed up at your door, and these days he came and went from your home. He was currently in search of his brother, Sirius, who he knew to be a part of the resistance. Regulus had explained to you how even though they had never gotten along, he would be more likely to listen to anything he had to say than other resistance members, who would probably arrest him on the spot.
You had crafted a port key for him - something that you were in fact good at - to access your house without revealing your location. This had led to him frequently jump scaring you by appearing in your living room out of nowhere, especially since he never showed up at the same time.
"Any news on Sirius?"
Regulus shook his head, leaning back into the plush pillows, "He's as good at hiding as I am."
"At least you have something in common."
He chuckled dryly, "I just can't escape the feeling that something is brewing tonight."
"Bad or good?" you furrowed your eyebrows, but secretly you knew what he meant. A new paranoia had been itching at you all day.
Regulus shrugged, "Both. Neither. Who knows?"
You followed his gaze to the thundering sky through the window.
"What day is it?" he asked.
You thought for a moment, "Halloween."
A thunderous boom echoed outside.
Regulus grimaced, "I'll source a newspaper tomorrow. Need to find out if I'm just being paranoid."
It was right then at that moment, as lightning flashed in the sky and lit up the whole room, that you knew he wasn't just being paranoid. A historical moment was taking place as you spoke: tragic, yet hopeful.
You felt a head drop on to your shoulder, and looked down in surprise to see that Regulus had drifted off quite peacefully next to you. Smiling to yourself, you adjusted your position so he could lie on you, unable to stop yourself from indulging in affection that filled your starving appetite for touch. He nuzzled his head into you, making a light and happy sound.
Sighing softly, you let your eyes drift shut.
***
He was gone when you woke up, as often was the case. While he slept at yours almost every night, he was prone to getting back late and leaving early, desperately searching for his elder brother.
Therefore, it was quite a surprise to see him burst through the dining room door at eleven o'clock in the morning, while you were frying eggs.
"Y/N," he said breathlessly as he approached the kitchen archway, a rolled newspaper crushed in one of his hands.
"What?"
"He's gone," he said, and if it wasn't for the smile on his face, you would have thought he was talking about his brother.
You barely had time to put the frying pan down before he continued.
"You-Know-Who," he said, throwing the paper on your kitchen counter, "They're saying he's dead - but I don't believe that - either way he's gone."
You moved to look at the newspaper of moving images and writing.
"He killed James and Lily Potter," he explained, "They were friends of my brother, but apparently he couldn't kill their son. Their one-year-old son."
Eyebrows furrowed, you ran your finger over the front page.
"I hope to Merlin that he never returns, wherever he is."
You chuckled.
"Salazar, I'm so happy I could kiss you," he said quite suddenly, making your head snap up.
Silence lingered between the two of you as you stared at each other with widened eyes, becoming hyper aware of your breathing. Then, his lips were on yours, and while it was a chaste kiss, it was passionate and intimate.
When you parted, Regulus rested his forehead against yours and wrapped his arms around your figure, pulling you flush against him.
"I've wanted to do that for so long," he panted.
"Me too."
***
The second time you were gathered around a newspaper together was not too long later, after the arrest of Sirius Black for the murder of Peter Pettigrew and being a suspected death eater.
"At least you managed to find and talk to him before this."
Regulus sighed, "Yeah. I guess."
You said nothing.
"He was the only one who could vouch for me. I can never earn people's trust now."
"I think you'll just need to stay on the down-low."
Regulus sighed again, taking your hand into his, "Can I stay here for that long?"
You chuckled, pulling him into your embrace, "You can stay here forever."
He smiled, kissing your head.
***
APPROXIMATELY SEVENTEEN YEARS LATER: 1998.
***
"The verdict of the state versus Regulus Black is as follows..." the judge sat in the courtroom at the Ministry of Magic announced, making your breath hitch as you crossed your fingers behind your back.
You locked eyes with your long-time fiancé who was stood in the centre of the room within a mini-cell, and saw the way his Adam's apple moved in a gulp.
"Regulus Black is found guilty of serving You-Know-Who and the anti-muggle-born terrorist movement..."
You threw your hand over your mouth, tears pricking at your eyes.
"...but is hereby pardoned from punishment due to his immense aid in defeating You-Know-Who thereafter."
Never had such a large amount of air rushed out of your lungs, as your son hugged you from the side, likely not understanding the words the judge used, but understanding the look of elation on his father's face.
You didn't stop Sirius from detaching from your side and running down to the cell as they unlocked it: in fact, you ran after him, eager to hold your fiancé in your arms. You watched as Regulus picked up his son and hugged him tightly, before dropping him to take you into his arms.
Pecking his lips, you beamed up at him with joyful tears streaming down your cheeks.
"We can finally get married," he said, kissing you again.
You giggled, "Hopefully before my bump gets too big."
Regulus' eyes widened as he moved his hand to your abdomen, his smile somehow growing even wider than it was before.
"I love you," he said breathlessly.
——————————————
masterlist
written; 02/10/2023 —> 20/12/2023 published; 21/12/2023 edited; —/—/——
163 notes · View notes
in-flvx · 9 months
Text
Enough of 'Sirius broke out bc he missed Remus so unfathomably more than literally anyone else and he felt more guilty of leaving him alone (?) for a while then about unknowingly leading James and lily into their deaths'
And more of: Remus saw that sirius broke out of azkaban, made the snap decision that the greatest chance to meet him would be where harry is, and then spends an entire book orchestrating moments in which he could possibly stumble into him to get the heartfelt reunion of his dreams
155 notes · View notes
l0standn0tf0und · 10 months
Text
Tumblr media
(I'll be honest, I don't really remember what the book says about this. And it’s also important to note that canon and fanon got mixed up in my head so much, so I can`t separate them)
But!
Just hear me out! Ok? It could be painful but anyway
Think about how Sirius came to Grimmauld Place for the first time since Azkaban. Firstly, he didn’t just come there after 12 years in prison. He came there for the first time since he was 16! But that's not the point.
The portrait of Walburga! I'm sure Sirius spoke to her!
Walburga couldn't just remain silent when she saw Sirius. She screamed at him, how he dared to come there, tried to kick him out of the Grimmauld. So Sirius immediately ordered Kreacher to cover the portrait. He tried to remove her from the wall… many and many times, but it was unsuccessful. So he had to accept that his mother would continue to grumble from under the cloth. Every time Sirius passed by, she continued to mutter, sometimes scream, and insult her own son. She called him a disgrace to the family, a blood traitor and said that he was not her son, not Black, and had no right to be here, she wished him death a lot of times. Walburga wanted to get him, to hurt him, and Sirius knew it. He knew he should ignore her. He tried, tried very hard to ignore insults from the woman who gave him life. It happened that several times he stopped in front of the covered portrait, but after a second, he gathered his strength and kept walking. But at one particular moment, something broke inside of Sirius. He furiously pulled the cloth off the portrait.
Just think about that conversation, if you can call it a conversation, that happened next.
Please, I'm begging, someone write extremely angsty and heartbreaking fanfic about it.
And also a few things that, in my opinion, happened then:
No matter how emotionally Walburga had screamed before, but the moment Sirius tore off the cloth, shouting “enough!” his mother sat there calmly with the coldest expression on her face, and the first thing she said was: “I’m not surprised that you betrayed Potters. You've been a wimp since childhood". And it was the moment they both new it, she got him, it was the point of no return.
It also seems to me that Walburga would blame Sirius for the death of his brother. Not because she thought so. Because she was hurt by the loss of Regulus, and she wanted to hurt Sirius the same way.
When Remus entered the Grimmauld Place that day, the first thing he heard was Walburga`s grating voice, resonating through the house in insults. She kept exclaiming all those awful things about family betrayal, Regulus`s death, and Potters, she even mentioned Remus. The next thing he found was Sirius on the floor in the very corner of the room, in complete darkness, because Sirius got used to this after 12 years. To the darkness and cold floor. Sirius sat there looking as miserable as never before. He was hugging his knees and rocking back and forth paranoidly. His eyes were red, tears were streaming down his cheeks, and all Sirius could say was a quiet and repeated "enough" mixed with sobs.
And also think if there was a portrait of Regulus in the house and if Sirius ever spoke to him.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
this pics was created by Ai. I couldn't choose which one is better, that's it
250 notes · View notes
kiwi2229 · 1 month
Text
Dog and his best friend
- Acrylic painting on canvas
James' and Lily' grave was the first place where Padfoot went after he broke out of Azkaban. It was like he was pulled here by an invisible string.
As he sits in the grass, the darkness of the night falling over him a thought crosses his mind. He could just stay here. Let the world run by its own course.
This is not what James and he meant when they talked about being together forever. It's far from it. But it's the closest Sirius can get to his best friend, his family. There never could be a world without James and Sirius side by side anyway.
He could just lie down on the soft grass next to the grave and wait until the ground would eventually swallow him too.
And then… they could be together once again.
Tumblr media
49 notes · View notes
once-upon-an-imagine · 9 months
Note
https://www.tumblr.com/once-upon-an-imagine/736653163249156096/wips
You’re still the one - Sirius Black
I am so in love with this plot I've thought about it like a million times and then I go to write it and it's blank but I got a few out 😂 also this will be very much AU since Sirius is getting out of Azkaban a loooot earlier so... hope you like it
send me a WIP
[Potter!Reader] When Sirius comes out of Azkaban he comes to find you and Harry. And he’s surprised to see someone else there too.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
You're Still The One
You're still the one I run to The one that I belong to You're still the one I want for life
Tumblr media
“Hey, Remus, do you have any milk? I ran out and didn’t have time to go to the store-”
As soon as you walked into Remus’ home, Sirius instantly froze when he heard your voice. That beautiful voice he hadn’t heard in three years. It wasn’t something unusual for you to walk into the next house as casually as you did. But this wasn’t the way it was supposed to go. Sirius was still getting ready to see you. Which is why, when you came back up, the milk bottle slipped out of your hand and broke down on the floor as soon as you saw someone standing in the living room— a half-naked someone covered in tattoos, who definitely wasn’t Remus. 
“Love” Sirius smiled, looking at you. The same smile he always had when he looked at you. He was about to walk your way, but you quickly grabbed what was nearest to you, which happened to be the newspaper on the table. You cursed silently for leaving your want in your own kitchen. “What are you gonna do? Kill a spider-?”
“Who are you?” 
“Bambi, it’s me-” he started, but you backed away. 
“No! Do not call me that! It can’t be you! Y-you’re not here!” you said, feeling your eyes welling up. 
He couldn’t be here. Sirius was in Azkaban. You knew that. You hadn’t seen him in three years. He couldn’t be just standing here in the middle of Remus’ living room. 
“Sweetheart, I can explain-”
“REMUS!” 
“What?” you heard Remus’ voice coming downstairs with clothes for Sirius. “Oh shit” he muttered when he spotted you. 
“What the fuck is going on?” you asked, still with the newspaper in front of you. 
“Calm down, okay?”
“Calm down!?”
“Bambi-”
“Shut up! Don’t call me that!” you said, turning to Sirius with your paper and he placed his hands up in surrender. 
“Okay, put the paper down” Remus said, walking closer to you. "Just calm down, and listen to me, okay?"
"I'm listening..."
"Are you calmed?" Remus asked.
"...I'm listening" you repeated.
To Be Continued
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
A/N: also, any suggestions or ideas for any stories are more than welcome!
214 notes · View notes
e-nonsense · 7 months
Text
─── '𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘺𝘢𝘭' 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘉𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘬
Tumblr media
anon: Can you do a Sirius x reader where he’s arrested for the murder of the potters and the reader goes to visit him in Azkaban?
pairing. sirius black x potter!reader
summary. after Sirius' 'betrayal' you confront him, when you break into Azkaban .
warnings. swearing, murder, azkaban, going mad, suicidal thoughts, attempted murder, betrayal.
a/n. thank you for the first request, I hope this is what you wanted.
wc. 0.7k (not proofread)
Tumblr media
Sirius sat there alone in the dark. It was his fault, he should have seen it, he should've known.
He hadn't even been there for week and he felt he was going insane, he was losing his mind questioning everything.
Did James feel it when he died? Did it hurt him? Was Harry okay? Where was Harry? What did Remus think? Was he okay the full moon was approaching soon. But most of all, do you blame? What did you think of him?
He sobbed for hours when it finally clicked in his brain. James and Lily were dead. His best friend was gone because of him. Harry was alone, Remus was alone. You were alone. He hoped you and Remus had each other, that you sought him out or he found you and that the two of you mourned together.
He heard people screaming in the background, but he was frozen. You were standing there, right in front of him. Why were you here? What were you doing?
His blood went cold, where you here to kill him? If you were — and he hoped, you were— would it haunt you?
The two of you stared at each other for what seemed like hours, but he broke it by whispering your name. "My love"
"Did you do it?" your eyes blazed with fury as you questioned him, "Remus said you did it. But I couldn't— I can't believe him."
Sirius stared at you, "how'd you get in?"
"Answer me Black!" you raised your wand at him, "My brother, is he dead because of you?!"
Sirius shook his head, "but it might as well be my fault."
He did nothing when you broke down into sobs, your knees sank onto the ground. He didn't want to startle you. "Tell me what happened" you demanded.
So he sat there on opposite sides of the room— if you could call, the damp stoney cell that. He spoke as you hung onto every word, you sat there and you listened to him just like you always had. And when he had finished telling you what actually happened the night of October 31st, you were in more tears. This time you walked over towards him and he held you as you shook and cried into him.
"I'm so sorry" he snapped out of his daze when he heard you apologise. "For what?"
"That they all blame you"
He sighed, "oh love, as long as you believe me I don't care."
You bith sat in silence again, only this time it was more comfortable. "How's Harry? and how did you get in here?" Sirius questioned you.
"Harry's at home with Remus they're both asleep." You answered the first question and Sirius couldn't help but feel a pang of jealousy— it should've been him and Harry, you and him should've been raising your nephew.
"and?" he asked, trying to get you to answer his other question.
"I turned into a cat. Dementors can't sense animal emotions, so they were practically blind to me."
Sirius hummed as he breathed in you scent, a smell that always relaxed him. He held onto you in fear that if he let go you'd disappear, and he'd realise you were never real.
He couldn't be selfish with you, Harry needed you. Remus needed you. And even though Sirius himself needed you, he had to let you go.
"You have to go dove" he mumbled into your hair although he made no move to let you go.
"Just a moment longer?"
"Just one more moment" he smiled and kissed you softly, "they need you sweetheart, hold Harry for and tell Remus I'm sorry."
"Do I have to go?" you gripped onto him.
"I'll see you again" he knew you'd return whenever you were able.
You nodded, "I love you, my heart"
He watched her turn into a cat and slip away, "and I love you more my angel."
Tumblr media
© e-nonsense. do no copy/steal/translate. do it and I’ll bite your toes off
Tumblr media
133 notes · View notes
casurlaub · 5 months
Text
Can we please agree that liking a character doesn't mean you have to explain away their every bad call? And that disliking a character doesn't mean you have to overlook their good qualities to have them fit your narrative? No one is just this or that. It's always a range.
The lack of nuance in parts of this fandom annoys me so much. And let's please drop the double standards - finding excuses for every 'bad' thing character A does while demonizing character B.
Dumbledore is no super villain. Yes, he put defeating Voldemort over Harry's (emotional) needs. He isn't some supportive father figure, but he's not responsible for the war nor everyone's decision to join in. 'He raised an army of children' - um no? Because if so, he, the greatest wizard of the age, did a shitty job. In both wizarding wars it was just one group of friends joining the Order, not a huge number of former students. So either super-smart Dumbledore seriously sucked at recruiting, or maybe he didn't try all that hard?
James wasn't some prime example of social justice warrior from the very beginning. Yes, he had - to some extent - a set moral code, he hated the Dark Arts, and he certainly never used dark curses on others. But he found it entertaining to hex students at random. He was a classic bully; he did it because he could and because he found it funny. He enjoyed it. But that doesn't mean he had no good traits - he cared for his friends, befriended Remus (practically an outcast), and later he changed. I can't get over the people who find excuses for Snape's bullying of his students, of literal children when he's an adult, but seem to think James was the worst person to ever exist.
Sirius has a ton of good qualities; I could write an essay about it. But guess what, that doesn't make the prank thing okay (no matter if Remus cared about it). The same goes for the Snape bullying and his condescending (cruel) behavior towards Peter. And his treatment of Kreacher, who was oppressed, not the oppressor. And why do we applaud him for 'forgiving' Remus in PoA for not trying to get him out of Azkaban? What's there to applaud? He was in Azkaban because he thought Remus was the spy, did we forget that? How do we expect Remus to suss out that Sirius thought himself clever enough to outsmart not only Voldemort but also Dumbledore? Sirius isn't on some moral high ground here. He wasn't in Azkaban because of Remus but because of his own arrogance and lapse of judgement.
Remus isn't some impersonated moral code. He isn't 'the sensible one' by default. He makes a ton of shitty, truly awful decisions (roaming Hogsmeade while a werewolf, not telling Dumbledore about the secret passages or Sirius's animagus form in PoA even after Sirius, the alleged mass murderer with an agenda of killing Harry, broke into Harry's dorm, abandoning Tonks...). But he isn't some master manipulator with a hidden agenda either. He was driven by his self-loathing first and foremost. And when did it become worse to be a bystander than to participate in the actual bullying? (I'm not saying it's okay, but how can we find excuses for James and Sirius, but Remus is super evil for doing... nothing? When it's stated that Snape was following him and trying to uncover his secret to get him expelled? Shocking he didn't feel all that sympathetic.) Of course he is passive-aggressive, of course he was selfish/cowardish, I don't know, but he isn't evil? He's usually kind (ffs, he even felt pity for Greyback), and his issues are in the end all rooted in his endless self-loathing. That doesn't excuse it. It doesn't. But it doesn't mean he's acting like he does because he's an inherently bad person. This idea of inherently 'bad' or 'good' people is naive and harmful anyhow. Besides - I feel some standards imposed on him are impossible to meet, when the same people are quick to explain away James's/Sirius's/Snape's flaws. Remus is suffering from massive childhood trauma that he's forced to relive every month, he's stigmatized for it by society his whole life, but he himself is supposed to just 'let it go'? Without therapy or anything? Right...
And even Lily isn't a saint. She's fighting back a smile when James is bullying her (supposedly) best friend?
Snape is no tragic hero whose every wrong is justified because he turned around and sacrificed himself. Of course, he was brave. Of course, he had a shitty childhood. That doesn't give him a free pass. He was up to his eyes in the Dark Arts when he arrived at Hogwarts already, he invented curses like Sectumsempra while at Hogwarts, he sold the 'love of his life' to Voldemort. And even after he 'changed' and overcame his fascist views, he bullied children he was supposed to take care of - as a grown man. Not only Harry, but also Neville, Hermione, Ron, who knows how many others. So, yeah, cool, he protected their lives 'when it counted' - 'when it counted'??? You don't belittle your students, you don't insult them, you don't threaten to poison their pets no matter what happened to you when you were a kid. You're an adult, take responsibility. Easy as that. What happened to you may be an explanation, but not an excuse. And do we really think he didn't strike back at James and Sirius? That it was just James and Sirius and him taking it lying down without doing anything himself? I don't.
It's entirely natural to relate more to one character than another and to feel more sympathetic towards them. But let's move away from this 'all or nothing' way of thinking.
To me, they're all beautiful because they're flawed. It makes them real. I don't want them to be stripped of their flaws, not even my favorite characters.
Don't take Sirius's darkness away, don't turn Remus into the ever gentle voice of reason or the super selfish master manipulator (same goes for Dumbledore) and ffs don't excuse Snape's fascist views and bullying of children.
92 notes · View notes