Consent = F.R.I.E.S.🍟
Consent! What is it and what does it look like? There are many aspects to giving consent, it's not just about saying "yes", so why not use the acronym 'FRIES' to remind yourself of all the things to consider when giving or asking for consent.
F - Consent is Freely given: you should never pressure, coerce or force someone into saying yes to something, this is not consent. You must respect when someone says no. You should feel confident and happy when you consent to any activity with your partner(s).
R - Consent is reversible: it is okay to consent to something and then change your mind, if you're not comfortable, say so and ask to stop. If your partner changes their mind on something you should respect their choice, and if they are willing, have a conversation about their decision.
I - Consent is informed: you should know what exactly you are consenting to and your partner(s) should too. It's good to discuss specifics beforehand and what you're both comfortable with.
E - Consent is enthusiastic: when someone is giving consent consider their tone and body language. Do they sound happy, upbeat and are they being proactive? Or do they sound hesitant, reluctant or closed-off?
S - Consent is specific: when someone says yes to one activity, it does not mean they consent to other activities. If someone has consented to something in the past, it does not mean that they have consented to doing that activity again in the future, you need renewed consent.
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The first kiss was a declaration rolled into a question: I have romantic feelings for you. Do you feel the same way?
The second was a fresh start: I love you still. Let's try again.
The third was desperation: My head's all fucked up and you're the one thing that makes me feel okay.
And the fourth and fifth were an affirmation: We've been through all this. I love you just as you are. My arms will always be open for you.
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aside from everything else about durgewyll I am loving how it highlights wyll and gortash as narrative foils. both their upbringings lead them to interact with demoniac entities, both can only become archdukes and join baldurian high society through uldred, both are swaying the dark urge from simply following bhaal (and arguably the dark urge sways them from simply pursuing an ideal and the dark urge can recognise both as their equal)
and by playing your card right in act 3 wyll just...gets everything gortash was trying to get? wyll really is a hero saving baldur's gate from the legion of the absolute. wyll influences gortash's favourite assassin into becoming someone they can defeat the netehrbrain together. they can even become archdukes together! ...or they can turn it down and then they can go to he hells to sneak around and have adventures (like gortash and durge used to) and save karlach's life (the same life that is at risk because gortash mindlessly threw it away).
like. it's a lot, wyll and durge can even murder raphael.
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most of us have heard of the red car game. you’re on a road trip, you’re bored, you start looking for red cars to do something.
and then they’re everywhere. you notice them nearly every few minutes.
there aren’t suddenly more red cars now, of course. you were seeing them already, but you weren’t noticing. you weren’t looking.
I am noticing things.
there is a plant I notice everywhere now, a small bushy plant in suburbs, along streets, by shops on the highways. dwarf umbrella bush is what the internet tells me when I look for it’s name. I did this because I wanted to know why,
every time I ever saw it, every place,
it was always dying.
always the leaves turning yellow, the branches small and scraggly. inside out - nitrogen deficiency. their soil drained.
I am noticing how many of these landscaping plants are yellowing, how small and sickly they look in just a few years. I am noticing how often the grass outside the house is replaced when it once again turns brown and dry, how the type never changes and the cycle starts again. I am noticing how the unmowed, unkempt spaces on lakesides and roadsides look more alive than this. how the preserve I grew up next to was miles of “messy” unmanicured nature and the ground was covered in leaves instead of grass and there was life.
I am noticing the birds that come by the lake. there was a flash of blue wings and red chest - eastern bluebird, male, relatively common. I had never seen one before. there is a family of ducks that appear every spring; i cannot say if it’s successive generations or different ducks, but I can always look forward to ducklings. there are little brown birds with white heads whose names I do not know - are they some kind of piper? why don’t I already know?
why is it so hard to learn about my native plants (accurately, that is)? why are so many gardening sites littered with people who think a plants value is based on how pretty or useful it is to them, who think a tree shedding leaves is “messy”?
why is knowing about the world we live in so… odd? why is it a hobby and not vital knowledge? I learned about polar equations. I taught myself about mycorrhizal networks and species of insects.
(did you know there are shiny green bees? a special species of wasp pollinating figs? that white flowers bloom at night for moths? do you know? have you looked?)
I cannot look at a lawn and see life anymore. it is a wasteland, devoid of life, dying slowly itself. everywhere is grass, grass, doused in water that runs over into storm drains, soaked in fertilizer and pesticides and a hundred other poisons and sending one clear message:
this is a place of death. life is not welcome here.
I do not think I could live in a city. too loud, yes, too busy, yes, too many people, yes, but the plants would bother me. a tree allotted only a convenient square, surrounded by dead stone and metal.
a forest cleared for this, for burning asphalt streets and racing cars and shops whose bathrooms are “for paying customers only”.
this is a place of death. life is not welcome here.
and now I am noticing.
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Look. I'm tired of pretending Fang doesn't have Big Dad Energy (he literally took Ed fishing! That's a dad thing!!) and I think there's great potential for Ed to finally find a positive father figure (nvm that he and Fang are like 10 years apart max idk) especially with another man of Pacific Islander heritage which I think is huge.
The only potential downside is if Fang is also sleeping with Lucius....like then his boyfriend's best friend is hooking up with his dad. Idk I think this is funny.
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