#They were terrible influence on each other

[heartsforvin]

maybe you could do a fic abt influencer gf! and vinnie 😖 like maybe she’s filming a yt video and he just walks in and basically hard launch their relationship :00

SECRET’S OUT

loveeee this idea !!! thank you for the request !!!

pairing; vinnie hacker x fem!influencer!reader

warnings; cussing, use of pet names, teasing, if i missed anything lmk !!

summary; you’re filming a youtube video and vinnie accidentally lets something slip

you and vinnie had been dating for a couple months now, but you kept your relationship private on socials.

no one on your platforms knew you were dating vinnie. being an influencer mostly meant your whole life was online, and you wanted to keep that part of your life to yourself as much as you could.

when you met vinnie you had told him that most of your life was online and that if the two of you started anything serious, you’d like to keep it private.

he was okay with that and very understanding. there had been arguments in the past about it. him saying he just wants to show you off but he can’t because of your profession.

you felt terrible, feeling like your keeping your relationship a secret instead of just for privacy reasons.

the two of you had a long talk, discussing solutions and talking out feelings. you came to a conclusion and you both were happy with it.

today, you were filming a video for your youtube channel. you had gotten everything set up in your room, making sure nothing was out of place before you hit record on your camera.

you explained how you were going to do a q&a, answering some frequently asked questions and other things that you see often in your comment section.

you pull out your phone and start answering the questions, going into detail about them as you do.

while answering another detailed question, you don’t see the incoming text from your boyfriend that tells you he’s made it to your place.

you wrap up with that question and move onto the next, still not seeing the text. before you can get a word out, your bedroom door opens and you see your boyfriend.

you smile, not knowing how to tell him your currently filming, he obviously doesn’t see the camera being held up by the tripod.

vinnie makes his way to you and tackles you, squeezing you tightly and showering you with kisses.

you giggle at the contact of your boyfriends kisses all over your face. vinnie lifts off you and smiles, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear.

“you look so pretty today, baby.” he whispers, kissing you softly.

“i don’t look pretty everyday?” you tease, making vinnie blush.

you hit his chest lightly and laugh. “i’m just kidding, vin. thank you.”

the two of you sit up, still facing each other. you realize that vinnie still hasn’t noticed the camera, which is filming everything.

“well actually, half the time you do look — what, i look like what?” you cut him off, giving him a smile to let him know you’re not actually upset with what he’s about to say.

“like the most prettiest, beautiful, sexiest, girl in the world.” he says sweetly, adding the last compliment just to see your reaction.

he watches you blush and cover your face with your hands. smiling, he removes your hands from your face.

“there you are!” he gushes. “i’m so lucky to be yours, y’know that?” he asks, caressing your cheek softly.

that’s when you tense up and realize the camera was still rolling, and he had said it loud enough to where it definitely picked it up.

all the touches and kisses didn’t register in your head, half the time you’ve been like this, you two were facing away from the camera, only your backs being shown in the frame.

“shit,” you curse as you carefully push vinnie off you. “i totally forgot.”

vinnie furrows his eyebrows in confusion, wondering what you were talking about.

you turn around and gesture to the film equipment right next to you.

“i was filming a q and a, i totally forgot the camera was still going when you came in..” you said.

vinnie caught on, “and i just slipped, didn’t i?” he asks, rubbing his hands over his face.

the camera was off now, but that doesn’t excuse the fact it picked up everything.

“you could always edit it out. i mean, it was like twenty minutes of just us goofin’ around.” vinnie told.

that was true, but then you’d have to refilm the whole video, having answered a question right as he walked into the room.

“i could always… leave it in?” you ask, wanting to make sure vinnie was comfortable with it.

his smile is so wide across his pretty face that you can’t help but smile too. he walks to you, wrapping his arms around you with a kiss to your head.

“if that’s what you wan— no, i’m asking you, v. do you want me to keep it in?”

you were already warming up to the idea of showing vinnie off on socials, you felt the time was coming soon, and you wanted to take that next step.

you knew vinnie had become a bit hesitant, not wanting your fans to get upset or anything like that. he knew how they could get from time to time.

he smiled at your generosity, holding your hands in his and squeezing them lightly. “i’m okay with it, i think we’ve waited long enough.”

you smile and kiss him, excited for this new step. it wasn’t anything huge, but now all of your followers could finally meet the boy that has made you the happiest you’ve ever been for months now.

grabbing the camera, you head straight to your desk and tell vinnie you’re going to edit it a bit before posting it.

once it’s posted, vinnie kisses your cheek and smiles. “i’m glad the secret is out, the secret that wasn’t really one, but you know.”

you laugh and rub your thumb against his cheekbone, kissing him.

“me too, i’m glad everyone finally gets to meet you now.”

hours after the video was posted, comments on all your platforms were going crazy. most of them said how cute you and vinnie are together, but there were a few that had been a bit rude.

you learned not to let them get the best of you. you had an amazing man that treated you right and loved you unconditionally, that’s all you cared about.

two posts in two days i’m on a roll 🤗

i just feel bad for leavin yall hangin for awhile sometimes, but i promise im working on stuff, life is just busy <\3

i hope you all liked this though !!! i loved writing it, it was so cute <333

tags: @anqeliclust , @cosmicanakin , @forevergirlposts , @slvthrs , @leqonsluv3r , @bernelflo , @visualbutterflysworld , @louloulemons-blog , @st4rswrld , @laylasbunbunny , @0strawberrysorbet0 , @hallecarey1 , @kayleighh , @violet0182 , @lovingsturniolo , @supabhad , @kriissy4gov

[batsybaz]

More Random Jegulus Parenting Headcanons (part 2)

TW: Mentions of abusive childhood, parenting guilt (fear of continuing cycle of abuse), mentions of food restriction as punishment.

The thing that hurts most is that as Regulus works hard to break the cycle of abuse he realises so many normalised aspects of his childhood were abusive. Especially in sleep-deprived moments when logic abandons him and he starts thinking instinctively.

For example: the first few weeks the baby cries nonstop - after a very long and loud night James finally rocks the baby to sleep and creeps down to his husband. Regulus is standing in the kitchen tearfully emptying bottles of prepared milk into the sink.

James is like ‘wtf?’ and carefully asks Regulus what he’s doing. Answers that he knows he should restrict feeding to train their baby to stop crying but he keeps giving in when he sees their hungry little face; he feels weak and like a terrible father so he’s removing the temptation by getting rid of the milk.

Regulus is so ashamed at his failure he can hardly look James in the eyes; after restraining the fierce urge to murder his husband’s parents James gently explains that Regulus’ instincts were right, food should never be restricted for children (or anyone) and he’s sorry Regulus had to go through that. The fact that Regulus acted against what he thought was normal proves even more that he’s an amazing father.

That night they discuss Regulus maybe attending therapy again for a while. He definitely starts meeting Sirius for coffee every week and talking honestly about their experiences parenting; during this time their relationship heals exponentially as they discuss the lasting effects of their parents’ treatment and learn to fully forgive each other.

Even with these supportive influences it takes Regulus six months before he stops constantly asking James whether a certain parenting behaviour is ‘normal’ before he does it.

[vikkirosko]

Hi hope you’re doing well!

How do you think Alastor, Husk, and Angel would be with a S/O who struggles to perform basic tasks/ get out of bed because of PTSD/ depression?

Headcanons Severe emotional state

🕷 Angel Dust x Reader 💖

Angel knew that there were a lot of bad things in your life. Even after death, when you were in Hell, you did not forget what happened to you and it left a mark on you. You had PTSD, which made life difficult for you, but Angel was there and tried to help you at least a little, as much as he could help you at all

He was the one who insisted that you should move to a hotel. He only offered it to you after he moved there himself. Angel knew that you were having difficulty doing your daily chores, so he felt calmer when he knew that not only he was with you, but also other people who were ready to help and support you

Angel often came to you at night. He knew you were having serious trouble sleeping, so he was looking out for you. You could stay awake for a long time, you could have nightmares, and in the morning it often happened that it was difficult for you to even get out of bed. Angel was there to at least help you with your nightmares. He didn't want you to feel bad alone when you wake up from a nightmare in the middle of the night

Angel understood that it was so easy for you to forget about what happened to you, so he tried to be there for you and support you. You didn't tell him exactly what happened to you, but Angel knew that when you were ready, you would tell him everything. He wasn't going to force you to tell him things that were hard for you to remember. In the meantime, he was just there for you and supported you as best he could

📻 Alastor x Reader 🎙

Alastor understood that you had problems from the first day you met. It was hard for you to do even the usual daily tasks. Sometimes you didn't even have the strength to get out of bed. The reason for this was depression, which has been with you for several years now

Every time Alastor broke into your day when you couldn't find the strength. He found ways to influence you, even though he couldn't get you out of depression. That's why he told Charlie about your condition, who took it very seriously and tried her best to help you. You knew you weren't hiding your condition, but you guessed who really told her everything

Alastor knew that at some point your condition could worsen even more, so he was there. When you had nightmares, he was there for you. He wasn't someone who could really help you with nightmares, but you felt safer when you knew that he wasn't hiding in the shadows, but was really next to you and you could rely on him

There were a lot of bad things in your life and Alastor wasn't the perfect person to be around, but he stayed close. He was the stability that he had from his life and you were glad that he was. You could have been much worse off without him. Some people didn't understand why you were so attached to Alastor, but next to him you really had more reasons to feel alive

🃏 Husk x Reader 🥃

You and Husk have known each other for a long time. He saw you in the most difficult moments of your life and tried to be there for you. It was very hard for you before you died. You've been through a lot of terrible things and now, in Hell, you had PTSD. Husk knew how hard it could be for you, so he tried to make sure that your condition did not worsen

You often sat with him at the bar, but Husk never gave you alcohol. He didn't want you to try to numb your pain with addiction, knowing that it would only make it worse. That's why he tried to find other ways for you to deal with difficult memories

Every morning he came to your room and checked that you were up. He knew that it was hard for you to get up in the morning, so he came to you and made sure that you would not spend the whole day in bed because you did not have the strength to get out of bed. Over the years that you were together, he learned exactly what to do in such situations

Husk didn't know if it was possible to completely cope with your PTSD, but he stayed by your side and helped you live as normal a life as possible. He was there for you and was ready to help you at least try to cope with the nightmares that have been haunting you so far

[wabatle]

hi!!!!!

can i req mafuyu, airi, an, akito, shiho, and rui with a super affectionate s/o?

sorry if that's too many characters, feel free to just ignore this

tysm, I love your work! ♡♡♡

WHAT THE HECK YOU PICKED ALL OF MY FAVORITES WHAT

so just for u anon i will put hearts instead of stars

♡~Mafuyu, Airi, An, Akito, etc, with a super affectionate s/o

(wa)batle nonsense (author's note):

this took me forever but I worked really hard on it, so ty for the request! and don't worry, currently i don't have a character limit, and i even added more!

warnings: none/all fluff

taglist: @stellas-starry-stove13, Rui and Akito are waiting!

♡~Mafuyu Asahina

The idea of being showered in affection is a foreign topic for her since her mother is a terrible person

She feels a subtle warmth when you’re being affectionate with her, like something that could never be replicated by someone else

Although she doesn’t understand what she’s feeling, she does know that when you put your arm around her or put your head on her shoulder she feels a sense of security and relief

I can see her as not minding innocent PDA, like holding hands in public or small cheek kisses, but save the more affectionate stuff for home

I think she sees your affection almost as a safe space, so she will always drop her good girl act around you so she can feel like the affection she’s getting is real

When she sees you attached to her, if you look close enough, you might be able to see a real smile

♡~Airi Momoi

Airi probably thinks it's really cute, and returns it whenever she can!

If you play with or style her hair, she might protest a little, but she won't complain after its done

She might get flustered if you're being really affectionate, but most of the time she'll be okay

I can see her as someone who is also very affectionate, so you two would probably cuddle a lot after school or streams

She probably also wants to be spoiled with cuddles and kisses after a show, so make sure you do that

Gonna be honest— movie nights are a must, she loves to be close to you and loves that you love to be close to her

You probably also play-fight all the time, often resulting in one of you hurting yourselves, but not a bad injury

Overall, she would be a really cute and affectionate girlfriend if you were also affectionate with her

♡~An Shiraishi

Another who would think it's cute and return the favor!

I cannot even describe how much An loves this

You probably pinch each other's cheeks a lot (I know it's cringe, but I just feel like that would happen)

If you're shorter than her, she will wrap her arms around your waist while you cook

If you're taller, she'll put herself in between your arms in front of you while you cook

Same thing for you but vice versa

I can see you being kept up late because you guys can't stop giggling and complimenting each other, and constantly cuddling each other so much one of you almost falls off the bed

You probably sit on each other's laps all the time. I'm sorry but it's true

Idk why, but I can see you two cuddling and writing down lyrics or thoughts for songs and shows

An loves to tease and make you all red, so you should do the same for her

♡~Akito Shinonome

He…likes it

Akito really likes being able to go home and cuddle with you after a long day, and watching a movie with you

He enjoys being showered in affection from you, because it means he gets to spend meaningful time with you

Ena hears about you nonstop. To the point where she has to forcibly change the subject to get him to stop talking about you

Akito would return your affection through gifts, I think

He would ask Ena what he should get you, or he’ll find something he just knows you would like, and he'll buy it on the spot

When you're cuddling or play-fighting, you might get him to tell you that you’re cute

Kisses. So. Many. Kisses.

For some reason, I see Akito as someone who is easily influenced by his s/o in some ways, so I think when you're being extra affectionate with him, he’ll be extra affectionate with you too

So I can see you sitting in his lap, or with in between his legs, or vise versa

If you're sitting like this, he will kiss the back of your head over and over again

He also would lay with his head in your lap and have you play with his hair (or vice versa, he would play with your hair too)

He will hug you from behind at home

♡~Shiho Hinomori

Shiho likes to be alone.

Let me specify, she likes to be alone with you.

PDA is a no-go with her, not even holding hands

Shiho really isn’t a person to like any type of affection, yet somehow she was able to fall in love with you, the most affectionate person she knows (even more than Saki!)

Shiho will hug you back and kiss you back, but only if you do it first so she knows what she’s doing

As much as she would hate to say it, she would ask Shizuku for advice on how to…relationship?

She would return your affection by letting you sit as close as possible and practicing her bass for you

She doesn’t really like clinginess, but she will accept pretty much anything from you

Shiho does appreciate your company, though

♡~Rui Kamishiro

Rui will 100% return it tenfold.

He will carry you around the house, outside, wherever you want to go

You can sit on his lap while he works on new blueprints for robots he’s working on

He’s very sweet to you and lets you be affectionate in anyway you want to to him

Slow dancing. I can see you two slow dancing at home randomly

You also sit in between his legs sometimes

He will let you cling onto him while he tells you about his ideas for shows or concepts for inventions

He probably can’t not cuddle you when you’re being affectionate, and that’s when the seating positions come in

It’s hard for you two to fall asleep because you keep whispering compliments in his ear and he keeps doing the same for you

If you go to the same school you have lunch on the rooftop everyday where you will cuddle together

If you don’t go to the same school then you’ll have to be like Emu and infiltrate

Not to mention kisses

He will kiss you anywhere on your face, the back/top of your head, even ears or neck

He likes to hold you close to him and stroke your head

Idk why but I feel like when you kiss it’s like something out of disney movie

☆BONUS☆

♡~Ichika Hoshino

Ichika will get flustered very quickly depending on what you’re doing

If you’re flirting, expect her face to get red

If you’re just hugging her a lot, she’ll still get red but she’ll hug you back

Like Shiho, one of the ways she’ll return your affection is by playing her guitar while you’re curled up next to her

Yet another who would stay up late by complimenting you

She practices singing around you, and when she gets nervous practicing she’ll squeeze your hand

She’ll ask you for your ideas for lyrics while you’re clinging onto her

She’s fine with pretty much any way you sit, as long as it’s not on each other

She’ll happily hold hands with you anywhere you go, and maybe even link arms!

♡~Shizuku Hinomori

She loves it!

You cling onto each other when you’re walking around, and cuddle together 99% of the time you’re at home together

You sit with your arms around each other and either one of you has their head on the other’s shoulder

When you hug her arm while she’s putting her miso soup in her thermos, she probably drops everything and hugs you back

When you go out shopping together you’re linking arms or one of you is clinging to the other’s arm

She’ll also let you sit with your head in her lap while she plays with your hair

She would love it if you sat behind her and styled her hair however you want! And then she’ll tell you how much she loves it and how good of a job you did, even if it doesn’t look good.

WHEW, MY LONGEST FIC YET!

want to know the word count?

1,360 words

help

[vorchagirl]

Sometimes I think about my old friends who I walked away from. I think about the fun we had, the beach trips, the laughs... and then inevitably I think about the sadder times when they lied to me, used me, and gossiped about me behind my back when I was going through one of the worst times of my life.

I don't regret making the choice to walk away from them - I had to because they'd become a terrible influence in my life, and I didn't need their lies, judgement, or pressure to behave like them. I don't think they realised what they were doing, but they had become a source of stress and anxiety for me.

The people I hang around with now are so much healthier. They don't gossip, they don't lie to me, and we support each other unconditionally. I genuinely love my friends, even the ones I distanced myself from. I think I'll always feel sad about my old friends, but my life is so much more positive now that I can't regret it.

And since I know some of my friends use Tumblr, if you're reading this and wondering if I've distanced myself from you because we haven't hung out recently, I haven't! I'm just awful at keeping up with people - you're amazing!

[drinkingdeadpeopletea]

Title: "flash-frozen in the driver's seat" Fandom: Midst (Podcast) Categories: G, Gen, No Archive Warnings Apply, Complete Word Count: 3613 Characters: Phineas Thatch, Tzila Guthrie

“Why do you have that?” Tzila asks. Phineas opens his eyes. She’s pointing at his abacus with the back of her pen. He looks down at it and frowns. “It’s my abacus.” “I know what an abacus is,” says Tzila, rolling her eyes. “Why do you have Caenum? Didn’t being a soldier and solving mysteries or whatever get you a ton of Valor?” Phineas and Tzila have a conversation in the quiet halls of the Lazaretto.

(hi everyone it's ME again! back with another midst missing scene i couldn't stop thinking about.)

[sskk-manifesto]

Atsushi's back in the game!!! ۶( ˆ o ˆ )

[justicode]

as famously as the two got along later, I know in my heart Atira and Samara's early interactions were full of her pushing their buttons. I know vividly that Samara was giving them flack, as per usual, for being so buttoned up and by the letter. a real soldier's soldier. and them hotly retaliating that they appreciate the clarity of rules, the certainty of goals and parameters, and Samara might benefit from a little discipline. Samara was curiously silent through their lil monologue, merely raising her brows. her response at the end? "I do not recall asking after your kinks, T'Kian, but I shall bear in mind you are submissive to the bone." oh the searing flush Atira had, the spluttering — priceless.

[eff-plays]

Ok so I watched the interview with Stephen Rooney, Astarion's writer, and here are some highlights. (I'm an aspiring writer and current game design student who wants to write for games so I'm sorry if some of these insights aren't as interesting to you as they are to me <3)

He calls Astarion his "horrible little vampire boy"

He loves seeing the fandom around Astarion<3

He did write other characters in the game, but mostly NPCs surrounding Astarion or his storyline, so it mostly revolved around Astarion

Astarion is not as connected to other companions/Origins as, for example, Lae'zel and Shadowheart, or Wyll and Karlach are to each other, but he is still reactive to their stories, even if it's just to stand off to the side and laugh when something terrible happens

He had a clear sense of where Astarion's story would start and end, but it got "muddy in the middle", but those are also moments where the best ideas come from

They write from the general idea that every character has one "good" and one "evil" ending, in order to give the player choice. RIP Ascendant apologists :(

According to Stephen, two of the most important aspects of Astarion's character (to keep consistent when bringing him to Idle Champions, at least) is that he enjoys violence, but is also fun about it

"He has a certain appreciation for violence, I guess? A bit of a murdery streak. [...] He's a vampire, he's all about blood, and he's all about, kind of, those darker sides of humanity. [..] But at the same time, he is ... He is really fun, he's really fun to write, he's really fun to have in your party, and it's very important for me that that is also represented."

"He's gonna stab you, but will have a smile on his face as he does it? I mean, I dunno. That's kind of him in a nutshell."

Larian would not have allowed for Astarion to be a typical brooding Dracula type, and there were scenes that were shot down for not being original enough

The main thing about Astarion was trying to get a "sense of fun." It would be easy to write a character that was very unlikable, and they absolutely did not want to do that

Rooney says Astarion is consistently terrible throughout the game and awful in a whole lot of ways, but he also needed to be charming enough that you could tolerate his presence and wanted him around

Rooney also had a lot of input on Astarion's stats (meaning the 10 Charisma is probalby 100% intentional)

He also had input on how certain lines should be delivered, even though the writers didn't directly work with voice actors

The way Astarion moves and poses is "all Neil"

Apparently, Neil Newbon worked on the character for years and Rooney did not speak to him once, though his voice work did influence how Astarion's lines were written and it became a "feedback loop" (Possible context for "ONLY SLIGHTLY, NEIL")

There were no points where a line delivery drastically changed Astarion's writing; rather it was a constant, slow evolution

However, there was one very spoilery moment where Neil gave such emotion to some "basic" lines that it fundamentally changed the scene (WHAT IS IT OMG)

It's difficult to balance approval, as you don't want to straight up write a monster. Every character needs to have some humanity in them. So if it comes to leaving the party, it needed to be the result of something central to said character. They wanted to be mindful of situations that would cause actual rifts between characters. (I assume this is why most generic disapprovals/approvals are +/- 1 or 2, while character-related ones give +/-5 or more)

However, as they don't write straight up horrible people/monsters, it doesn't come up as often as one might think.

The interviewer makes a point about how characters like Astarion and Lae'zel are good examples of how to play "evil" characters, as they are maybe not the best people but are still eager and willing to stick around the other party members

They worked to make sure the characters would work as a group, no matter the configuration of the group. The characters needed to be on the same path, even if they don't always agree or walk that path the same way.

Stephen Rooney is very proud of the "climactic" scene of Astarion's story. (AS HE SHOULD BE.) He even had to step away from the computer and have an emotional moment. Me too, man.

He's also "extremely pleased" that there's a point where you can punch Astarion in the face. "Actually, that one might be my favorite part" A MAN OF THE PEOPLE!!

Stephen Rooney's tip on what specific thing you should try out with Astarion: When he's trying to get a "sneaky nibble" at night, you should "probably" let him bite you. Way ahead of you there, sir.

No discussion about Astarion's romance unfortunately, but that's that!

[ellecdc]

PART 2 PLSSSSSSSSSSS

I need the comfort

ok ok ok ok ok mother's here - I've fixed it for you. Don't say I never did anything for ya 😉

part two of Mistake: poly!wolfstar x fem!reader

CW: angst, hurt and COMFORT read part one here

Remus felt like he’d just been slapped. In fact, he was sure that if he looked in a mirror, he would see a red welt in the shape of your hand across his cheek. 

Lupin?

You haven’t called him that since...well since you started dating. As a matter of fact, he can’t remember the last time you referred to him in any way other than some sickly-sweet pet name that he pretended embarrassed him, but he secretly preened at. 

I’ll see you around.

What the hell did that mean? What just happened?

He felt stuck...perhaps he should go after you? But you told him to go check on Sirius: make sure he’s okay for me, yeah? And he meant what he had said – the three of you would be back to normal in no time. They’d catch up with you tomorrow.

Remus tried to replay every interaction you had tonight. You had asked how their days were...he replied and asked how yours was. Should he have asked you first?

He should have asked you first.

You tried making conversation, but Remus was so hyper focused on Sirius’ mood – afraid that he’d do or say something out of pocket that would hurt your feelings – that each attempt sort of fell flat. Remus had been there before – he’s witnessed Sirius’ tendency to self-sabotage and ruin a good thing once he finally has it, and he didn’t want that to happen again. Not with you.

He knew what Sirius really needed was some quiet; a chance to ponder and lament angrily inside his own head without outside influence.

Maybe they should have cancelled – rescheduled your study date for another time. Clearly his effort to protect you from any negativity was in vain.  

But it was just a bad day, a blip, a one-off. You would all get some good sleep tonight and reconvene tomorrow.

Right?

Maybe he should have followed you.

But by the time he could manage to pry his feet from the floor of the library that he felt cemented to, you were gone. 

He would just have to talk it out with you tomorrow.

Remus entered his dorm to find Peter already asleep on his bed, James finishing the Transfiguration essay that was due tomorrow morning on his own bed, and both Remus and Sirius’ beds empty. 

“Pads around?” Remus asked James quietly as he began to shuck off his uniform. The quiet tone was mostly for courtesy’s sake knowing Peter could sleep through a stampede of hippogriffs.

James peered at Remus from above his glasses before nodding his head towards the bathroom door.

Sure enough, Remus found Sirius leaning against the shower stall with his eyes closed as the water cascaded around his form. 

“You almost done, love?” Remus asked gently. Sirius spooked slightly as he turned to look at Remus; his eyes were red and glossy...he had been crying.

“You didn’t stay with her?”

Remus fought the urge to grimace, to heave, to turn around and run. He opted to gently shake his head. “No, she... said she got most of what she needed to do done.”

Sirius seemed to consider that as he sighed. “Was she terribly upset? I didn’t...I didn’t mean to be an ass. I know James always says I’m quick to take it out on others – I tried really hard not to, honest. I swear it, Rem I-”

Remus began shaking his head as he moved towards Sirius. He could tell by the smell in the bathroom that Sirius had already washed his hair and there were no more suds on his body, so he turned the water off and handed Sirius a towel. 

“You were fine, Sirius. She’s – she’s fine.” He lied.

He lied. He lied to Sirius. About you.

But how could he look Sirius in the eye right now – Sirius who was currently standing naked, soaking wet, nearly hyperventilating, not over his disgusting parents but because he was afraid that he may have upset you – and tell him that between the maybe seven minutes since Sirius had left the library and now, Remus had completely mucked it all up?

The answer was: he couldn’t. He couldn’t look Sirius in the eye and admit that he may have just sabotaged your relationship.

It’s going to be fine. He tried to tell himself. We’ll fix this all tomorrow.

You felt beyond childish, hiding in your dorm room like some toddler throwing a temper tantrum. But you had decided last night that what you really needed was space. Some breathing room. A chance to see this from a different lens. A different perspective.

And you couldn’t do that when your heart was breaking. And being around Remus and Sirius felt like that right now.

It felt heart breaking. 

And perhaps that was your answer right there. If this was causing you heart ache, why were you doing it to yourself? To them? You didn’t deserve that, and neither did they.

But it wasn’t just this you were worried about. It was more than just this relationship – it was the friendship that preceded it. It was the meshing of you into their circle of friends. You were their friend long before you were ever their girlfriend. You wouldn’t just be losing Remus and Sirius: your boyfriend’s; you’d also be losing Remus and Sirius: your friend’s.

Maybe you should have thought about that before you said yes.

Suddenly, you were a little angry: they had asked you to be their girlfriend – not the other way around! Why would they put you through all of this for, what? For...

Was it really for nothing?

“Are you coming to breakfast?” Shelby asked you quietly from the door. You shifted your head on the pillow to make eye contact with her. “No, I’ve got some things to work on. I think I’ll hang out up here today.”

She seemed to consider you, eyes squinting and mouth pursing before she offered a curt nod. “I’ll bring something back for you then.”

You smiled gratefully at her. At least you knew if you did lose Remus and Sirius, you would still have friends who cared about you. 

Sirius spent most of his life believing he’d never be worthy of nice things. He was raised by monsters which meant he was a product of monsters; he was basically a monster.

He knew that the Black Darkness was always simmering just below the surface. It was archetypal of Black’s to explode; to lace their words with venom and strike at their victim, always aiming for the jugular. It had been Sirius’ own M.O. for his whole life. He had nearly lost everyone who ever meant anything to him on account of it. He had almost lost Moony.

Which is why it was so important to him that you never end up the latest victim of his Black Darkness. He was so afraid of disappointing you, letting you down, making you feel unloved. He didn’t think he’d ever be able to live with himself if he slipped – if he said something or did something to make you hate him. 

And it wasn’t just you he was worried about hurting; he knew if he hurt you, Remus would likely never forgive him.

Remus may have forgiven Sirius for his Darkness once; he didn’t want to risk trying for a second time. Sirius felt he’d hit his threshold for forgiveness – one more sin and he’d be on his own, surely.

So, he walked away. He tried to do it nicely – to excuse himself politely, assure you he’d be back in no time. 

But he still left.

It was cowardly. 

He needed to talk to you.

Which is why Sirius could be found that morning sitting at the Gryffindor table in the Great Hall, knee bouncing frantically under the table and his body turned towards the entrance – waiting for you to make an appearance.

Except, you never came.

“Wait, Shelby just walked in without her. Where is she?” He asked despondently, turning towards Remus. 

Remus watched as Shelby and a few of your other friends sat at their usual places without you. “Come on.” He said quickly as the two of them stood and made their way over.

“Hey Shelby. Do you know where Y/N is?” Remus asked quietly, hoping his guilt didn’t permeate his tone. Unfortunately, under Shelby’s scrutinizing glance, he was sure he had been found out. 

“She’s in the dorm.” She said flatly, looking between the two boys. 

Sirius exchanged a glance with Remus before continuing. “Erm, do you...do you know why?” 

Shelby furrowed her brows “all she said was she had ‘some things to work on’ and that she’d be in the room today.”

Remus hissed under his breath and pulled Sirius aside.

“Pads, I’m sorry, but I think-”

“What is going on?” Sirius interrupted.

“Last night, I... I think Y/N was upset?”

“Upset? With me?” Sirius asked, shame worming its way through every cell in his body. 

“I don’t know. I... I don’t think so. But she...she said she’d ‘see me around’ and then called me Lupin.” 

All blood drained from Sirius’ face as he considered Remus’ words.

See him around...see him around!? What the hell did that mean? Did you not plan on seeing them again? Oh gods...you never planned on seeing them again.

“Rem...” Sirius breathed out, leaning against a pillar for support.

“I know, I don’t-”

“Good grief, what’s gotten into you two?” James commented as he walked into the Great Hall with Lily, who opted to carry on in her search for Regulus as James took in the state of his two friends.

“Well? What’s got you in such a twist?” He pressed when neither boy offered an explanation.

“It’s Y/N.” Remus admitted.

“She’s leaving us.” Sirius blurted.

“Okay, we don’t know that.” Remus conceded.

Sirius scoffed. “Well, she basically told you to go fuck yourself last night and now she’s avoiding us; what do you call that?”

“She didn’t tell me to go fuck myself!”

James groaned and rolled his eyes before grabbing Remus and Sirius’ shirts and dragging them over to the Slytherin table.

“That’s it. You guys need to talk to Regulus.” James muttered.

“Regulus?!” Sirius sputtered, looking at James incredulously. “I’m not asking my baby brother for relationship advice.”

“You’re not asking for relationship advice. You’re asking for his perspective on his own relationship.”

“Ew! That’s worse! I don’t want to hear about my baby brother’s relationship with my adoptive brother.” 

“Oh for- you are going to listen to Regulus’ perspective on what it’s like being added to a polyamorous relationship last.” James pressed, tone implying no nonsense. 

Sirius (unwillingly) and Remus (placidly) were dragged to the dark side (read: the Slytherin table) to be read their Miranda Rights have their asses handed to them by one Regulus Arcturus Black. 

“Reg, dear. I’m begging, pleading, on my hands and knees: put the poor sods out of their misery.” James said as he bodily sat Remus and Sirius on the bench across from Regulus.

Lily snickered and poked her nose into Regulus’ cheek, causing the youngest Black to blush, though the rest of his face remained stoic as he sized Sirius and Remus up.

“What have the two of you done now?” He drawled. “I can’t help but notice one third – arguably the better third - of your little trio is missing.”

Sirius scoffed, though he didn’t argue – Regulus wasn’t wrong per se; he loved Moony, but you were indeed the best of the bunch.

James cleared his throat pointedly as he shot Remus and Sirius a look.

“Right, er” Remus started awkwardly. “We seem to have, uhm. I mean to say that-”

“Why does Y/N hate us?” Sirius spat, slapping a hand over his mouth immediately afterwards as if those words had fallen from his mouth without his consent.

“Y/N? As in your girlfriend, Y/N?” Regulus asked, moving his eyes between his brother and his brother’s boyfriend.

“Yes, as in our girlfriend.” Remus muttered.

“What did you say to offend her?” James asked unhelpfully.

“Do you think if we knew that, we’d be here right now?” Sirius spat back. 

“No, I don’t think that.” Regulus answered for him. “What I think has probably happened is she’s feeling terribly insecure in your relationship and neither of you have done anything to help her.”

Well that shut Sirius up... Sirius noticed that Remus was pretty quiet too.

“Were...” Sirius asked, grimacing when he looked over at Lily and James knowing this was teetering slightly into the realm of things-he-doesn’t-really-want-to-know-about-his-brother’s-relationship-with-his-best-friend territory. But damnit, Sirius was as desperate man. And desperate times called for desperate measures. “Were you terribly insecure when you started dating...these two?” Sirius sneered the end of his sentence earning him a ‘hey!’ from Lily and a solid whack up the back of the head from James.

“Yes.” Regulus answered simply.

“Why?” Remus asked, looking desperately close to pulling out his notebook to take notes. Scratch that, Sirius watched as James swallowed a teasing remark when Remus actually pulled out a notebook to take notes. 

“It’s hard coming after. There’s a part of your brain that convinces you that you are second best; that you’ve somehow come in second place. If that’s not bad enough, then you begin spending time with two people who already have history, already have a connection, and already have a rhythm that doesn’t leave much room to pull you into the mix. And if it does pull you into the mix, you end up feeling terribly guilty for disrupting that rhythm. It’s all quite difficult.”

Sirius’ mouth hung open at Regulus’ demure tone on what sounded like a really heartbreaking situation. 

“Let me ask you this,” Regulus continued, unawares of Sirius’ inner dialogue (which consisted mostly of panicked ‘oh my gods oh my gods oh my gods oh my gods). “How has your relationship – between the two of you – changed since you added a third?”

Remus and Sirius exchanged a glance before looking back at Regulus. “Uhm...not, really?”

“Not much at all.” Remus admitted more clearly.

“I see...” Regulus said, narrowing his gaze. “And how much time have each of you spent with her individually without the other present?”

Regulus got his answer in the form of awkward silence. 

“How did either of you expect your relationship to work if neither of you were willing to change the nature of yours in order to help it grow?” Regulus spat. 

“Well...” Remus started, but his sentence died when he realized there was nothing to say. 

“But...you stayed? Why?” Sirius asked his brother.

At this, Regulus’s face fell as he gave Sirius a sad smile. “Because of how we were raised, Sirius. I was so excited to be wanted, even for a moment, that I was willing to beg for scraps of whatever I could sink my claws into. She doesn’t strike me as that kind of girl.”

James and Lily looked forlorn as the latter placed her hand on Regulus’ shoulder consolingly. 

“It didn’t hurt to have the walking definition of unconditional love and the smartest, most intuitive witch I know to notice any discontent on my part.” He admitted shyly, earning him a smack of a kiss on the cheek from James.

“Gross. You guys are sickening.” Sirius muttered petulantly.

“So?” Lily interrupted what was close to becoming a squabble between the two Black brothers. “What are you guys going to do?”

Remus sported a determined expression as he looked to Sirius. “We’re going to make it right.”

Shelby stood by her word and brought your breakfast. She also brought you lunch, and then dinner. But by the following morning, she was tired of playing the role of house elf.

“Alright, are you going to tell me why you’re avoiding Lupin and Black?” She asked plainly, plopping herself down uninvited onto your bed.

“Wha-? I’m ... I’m not avoiding them.” You lied poorly.

“Please; don’t spit on my muffin and call it frosting, Y/N. You’re obviously avoiding them.”

“I...ew?”

She groaned and fell onto her back in defeat. “Please, for all that is holy, tell me why they’ve been following me around like kicked puppies hoping I’ll take them to their master?”

You rolled your eyes and turned back to your book that you held open but had never been reading. “Yeah, I’m sure they’re real upset.” You muttered.

“That’s it.” She spat and plucked your book out of your hands, throwing it over her shoulder unceremoniously. You cringed to think about how Remus would feel seeing a book treated in such a way.

“I was reading that!”

“Don’t lie to me again.” She said, levelling you with a ‘no nonsense’ look. “Spill.”

You sighed deeply, looking toward the window to try and find the words you’d spent the last 24 hours trying to formulate. She never rushed you for your answer, giving you all the time you needed. 

“I feel insignificant.” You admitted finally.

“And?”

You turned to face her, bemusement painting your features. “What do you mean, and?”

“And... have you spoken to them about it?”

You felt a little embarrassed to admit that no, you hadn’t.

“Why not?”

And that simple question seemed to set off all the emotions (mostly frustration) that simmered beneath your surface.

“Because Shelby. Because I don’t want to have to beg for love and affection. I don’t want to have to tell people how to love me; they should just already love me. I don’t want to feel like I’m intruding in someone else’s relationship. I don’t want to have to point out that I’m here and I’m hurting. It’s mortifying. I... I think I’m just done.”

Shelby nodded in understanding before she stood from your bed. “Then you need to finish this today. No more hiding in your room being angry by yourself, and no more letting them sniff around the castle like dejected little runts. Put all three of you out of your misery.” 

It was your turn to nod as you too stood from your bed, ready to face possibly one of the most heartbreaking days of your life.

But Shelby was right; it was time. 

The worst part was that Shelby had been telling the truth; Remus and Sirius did look like kicked puppies. 

The second you had entered the Great Hall you heard a crash of knees against benches and cutlery clashing as Sirius clumsily tried to vacate his seat in record time to make it over to you.

“Y/N!” He called, as if you could have missed the racket he made just prior. 

He looked gaunt – like he hadn’t eaten or slept enough (in the only less than 48 hours) since you’d seen him last. His eyes were red and a little swollen, like he’d been rubbing at them.

You immediately felt sick with guilt; if he really was struggling with things with his family, the last thing you wanted was to add to his stress. But Sirius was looking after himself, and Remus was looking after him too; someone needed to think about you. You had to look after yourself.

Remus didn’t look much better, approaching the two of you much more slowly, hardly making eye contact with you as if you’d lash out at any moment. You had to admit that it annoyed you a little bit.

“Hi Sirius.” You offered, voice grating over the sudden tightness. “Remus.”

Some of the tension seemed to leave Remus’ shoulders as he made an effort to make eye contact with you.

“Can we talk?” He asked timidly. 

You knew what was coming, what was happening, what you yourself had come here planning to do.

But it broke your heart nonetheless.

“Sure.” You whispered, and exited the Great Hall without waiting to see if they were following you. 

You walked into an empty classroom and leaned against one of the walls as Remus and Sirius closed the door behind them. They shared another look and stood opposite of you.

More secret conversations. You thought bitterly. And doesn’t this just paint a lovely picture; them versus you. 

“Y/N. We, uhm...we’ve been talking, and we realized that...that maybe we haven’t gone about this the right way.” Sirius started, looking at Remus continuously as he addressed you. 

We’ve made a terrible mistake. 

“We didn’t take into account the ways in which our relationship would have to change in order to make the three of us work” Remus added.

We didn’t realize how much you’d take away from us, you heard

“We feel like we’ve been unfair to you, and... we’re really sorry.” Sirius concluded, looking like his heart had been ripped out of his rib cage. You supposed that would make sense, considering that’s how you currently felt yourself.

It probably hurt all the same to them – they’d be losing the friendships the three of you had created too; the friendship you had with Remus, the friendship you had with Sirius, and the fun the three of you had all together. But you still loved them, and the last thing you wanted to do was to interfere in their relationship.

“It’s okay, it wasn’t your fault.” You admitted finally. “It was just a mistake.”

Remus’ head cocked to the side like a confused puppy whilst Sirius’ eyebrows furrowed. “Well...I, I’m not sure-” Remus started but was cut off by Sirius.

“Wait, Y/N, what exactly do you think the mistake was?”

You looked between the two of them as you lifted your shoulder. “I... I guess including me?” You stated as a question.

Sirius actually sputtered as Remus stepped towards you, stopping himself seemingly before he made to grab you.

“No! No, Dove. That’s not a mistake!” He insisted.

“Are you kidding? You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to us – no, no. This...wow, okay. Can we start from the beginning, please? Why do you think this was a mistake?” Sirius managed to (barely) get out.

You looked to the ceiling, eyes stinging at the reality of having to voice your hurt. “Because” your voice came out embarrassingly high. “Because it-it felt...better when we were friends. I didn’t feel...in the way. And it felt easier. Just - I didn’t mean to come in between you, and I never...” you cut yourself off, quickly moving into hyperventilating territory. 

“But-”

“It’s not a mistake!” Sirius shouted, cutting Remus off. “This wasn’t a mistake! You weren’t a mistake. I... okay. I didn’t mean to fall in love with you, that’s true. But I don’t consider that a mistake. Not you, never you.”

“It was a surprise; a happy accident.” Remus added hopefully shy.

You felt drunk...dizzy...beyond confused. Weren’t they breaking up with you? Weren’t you supposed to be breaking up with them!?

“I think it was easier when we were friends because we weren’t putting so much pressure on ourselves to get this right.” Sirius explained.

Remus nodded and continued. “Sirius used to get so jealous if I got to hang out with you without him if he was at practice – took us a while to figure out that it was because he wished he was the one hanging out with you. When we started dating, I guess Sirius and I figured we’d just make sure to always hangout with you together so that neither of us felt left out. But we never even thought about how that must’ve been making you feel, dove. I’m so sorry.” 

“Regulus read us our rights.” Sirius admitted abashedly. “He pointed out that the relationship between the three of us will only work if our relationships with each other are strong. And we didn’t make our individual relationships with you a priority – that was our mistake, Y/N. Not you.” 

“Our mistake was believing you would just ‘catch up’ to where we are – which is years in the making – and also expecting you to somehow do that on your own. It was selfish and thoughtless.” Remus stressed

The things they were saying made sense and spoke to your very soul, but you couldn’t shake off this lingering feeling of dread.

“I... I should have said something... about how I was feeling.”

Sirius sighed, but it was Remus who spoke. “I think all of us could have done a better job communicating, that’s true. But we should have been more considerate. We asked you to join us, dove; we should have made that easy for you to do.”

“To think how much grief we’ve caused ourselves, when we could have just solved this all with a conversation.” Sirius mumbled dejectedly. 

“We’re not too late, are we? To solve this?” Remus asked quietly. Sirius’ eyes looked like they were close to popping out of his skull as he stood and made for you, grabbing your hands pleadingly.

“Oh gods, Y/N. You... you were breaking up with us, weren’t you? You thought we were breaking up with you?” His voice sounded very close to a sob.

“Please...please dove I- I don’t know that we deserve it, but please give us a chance to make this right, to do this properly. Give us a chance to love you the way you deserve.” Remus begged, moving to stand in front of you with Sirius, though he controlled his urge to grab your hands. 

You looked between the two boys; the two boys who you’ve been basically in love with for so long – the two boys who have proclaimed to feel the same way about you - and wondered to yourself again:

Have we made a terrible mistake?

Remus’ golden eyes shimmered with compassion and warmth, and Sirius burned fiercely in devotion and promises.  

Had you made a mistake? Falling in love with them?

No.

Perhaps Remus was right. Perhaps this was a happy accident.

“Okay.” You whispered. Remus exhaled the breath he’d been holding while Sirius’ face morphed into a small, hopeful kind of smile – far shyer than you were used to seeing from the boy.

“Okay?” He asked, moving his hands up from your wrists to your shoulders.

“Yeah... I-I don’t want to lose you guys.” You admitted wetly, a tear betraying you as it fell down your cheek. Sirius was quick to catch it with his thumb.

“Never, dove. Not if I can help it.” Remus promised. 

You believed him.  

taglist: @cyripticchronicler @orphicmortala @hcqwxrtss123 @ssc7514 @misacc08 @ashie-babie @milkyasteroids, @maqqiekwon @daisiesformylove @littlenerdybee @allllium

[theoldsports]

Married | Part II

LINK TO PART ONE

Coriolanus Snow x Reader | 5.1K words

FILTHY SMUT 18+ ONLY. oral (m and f receiving), dubcon, alcohol makes consent messy, brutal sex, blackout drunk, bad media coverage, lingerie, exhibitionism (a little), they’re both terrible for each other in the best way possible, possessiveness <3 this one gets a bit dark.

Married, back by popular demand. hope it’s okay. i worked hard, i’m a bit nervous. let me know what you thought. requests always open.

“Not a villain,” Coriolanus scoffed. “A star.”

He inhaled and set his sights towards his next objective. Already leaning in, Coriolanus pulled [Y/N]’s earlobe between his lips tantalizingly. “Now, I seem to recall being promised a blowjob, my Darling.”

[Y/N] sighed. “I had hoped you’d forgotten.”

Coriolanus smirked, inches from her face. “I never forget a promise.” He muttered.

The driver pulled up in front of them with his car and Coriolanus pulled [Y/N] inside. [Y/N] put her head on Coriolanus’ shoulder instead of putting on her seatbelt for the short drive home. She was drunk enough not to care if she was touching him, or if he was touching her. Coriolanus was touching her. He was touching her too much already at her thighs and hips. The pair of them had already broken the touch barrier that evening, but her brain was too loopy to try to push any kind of new/old boundary.

[Y/N] blinked heavily. She was able to tell that Coriolanus was already becoming frustrated with the bulk of tulle that was her black gown. It was funny for an engagement party when she thought about it, since it stood in stark contrast to her crisp white wedding gown. Coriolanus couldn’t seem to figure out how to touch her right under all the fabric as he had then they were standing earlier.

“Is your wedding dress going to be easier to handle?” Coriolanus said into the back of her ear. “This one is starting to get on my nerves.”

“I can’t tell you that. You’re not ‘pposed to see it til you see it at the alter.” She giggled sadly.

Coriolanus frowned. “Ancient superstition,” he said. “I’m not seeing it anyway. You’d be telling me about it. It’s different.”

“Nice try.”

Coriolanus’ frown deepened as he rolled his icy blue ice. “May I ask you something else, then?”

“It depends.” [Y/N] said clearly. Too clearly, really. That was the problem with drunk people, they knew they were drunk, but they tried to prove to everyone around them that they weren’t.

Coriolanus laughed at her expense. She was behaving like a child. He found it equal parts charming and frustrating. “Have you ever given a blowjob before?” He asked too loudly for [Y/N]’s liking.

“Coriolanus!” She gasped, smacking his arm.

“I’m just asking! You don’t have to strike me. Haven’t we had enough of that for one night?”

[Y/N] hated Coriolanus. He made her blood boil. “What does it matter?” She growled.

“I was curious if you had offered because it was a matter of superior ability, or because that was the only thing you had to offer.”

“You’re calling me desperate!”

“I wasn’t specifically, but since we both agree that it’s true…”

“All this was shaping up to be halfway tolerable, and you open your big mouth again. Fuck you!”

“Yeah, I know. You fucking me is what I was aiming for. Yes or no on the blowjob thing? I was assuming you had, if it makes any difference.”

[Y/N] paused. She had given a blowjob. Quite a few, actually. They were very convenient for getting out of a bad situation fast. She didn’t answer. [Y/N] still didn’t have the courage to say that in front of the driver.

“You can say yes. I know you’re not a virgin.” Coriolanus said bluntly.

Coriolanus would know that. Prior to their engagement, it was true that [Y/N] had pulled Coriolanus in for a quick fuck at a University party. She was shocked that he implied he even remembered that for as drunk as she recalled him being. [Y/N] wondered if the two of them would only ever be able to love each other under the influence.

“Can this conversation wait a few moments, we’re almost home.” [Y/N] replied.

“You didn’t have much of a problem back at the party in front of damn near everyone that’s ever known you. Is one driver going to make a difference?”

“FINE!” [Y/N] snapped. “Fine. I have, I give a decent blowie. Happy?”

Coriolanus smiled an uncharacteristically wide grin. The driver coughed slightly and loosened his tie. [Y/N] would have been incredibly embarrassed if she had any dignity left. Coriolanus grinned even wider at his driver’s behavior. His new favorite pass time was seeing how far he was capable of pushing [Y/N] to do whatever he wanted. So far, so good. Her initial resistance before her moment of breaking and behaving even worse than himself is what made this all the more fun.

The driver pulled up in front of the steps to their city apartment. Coriolanus gathered [Y/N]’s long forgotten shoes from the car’s floor. The driver got out to open the door for [Y/N]. Ever the gentleman publicly, Coriolanus ran around the side of the car to get it faster. He helped his fiancée out of the car. A Herculean task when you consider the alcohol in her system and the weight of all the fabric in her ballgown. “Come on, Darling,” he said, yanking her somehow elegantly towards the stairs, “we have business to attend to.”

Coriolanus helped her up the stairs and into their apartment. It was easier than it had been on the way out in those deathtrap heels he had purchased her.

Faintly, [Y/N] heard the door snap shut behind her and the deadbolt click resolutely. She leaned up against the wall. Coriolanus left her field of vision for a moment. When he re-entered her sights, [Y/N] blinked up at him. “Hi.” She said.

Coriolanus smirked at her curiously. “Hello.” He replied.

“Don’t take this the wrong way,” [Y/N] started. She took a clumsy step towards Coriolanus and grabbed the lapels of his coat for support once she could reach him. “You’re quite pretty,” she said. Coriolanus began a laugh. “No! Don’t. Don’t do that. I mean, you’re a very attractive man. You are. Too bad that you’re—“

“Don’t finish that sentence,” Coriolanus cut in with a scoff. “Here, let me help you,” he pulled her in closer. His hands moved nimbly down her back to pop open one button after the other on her dress while still allowing her to support herself against his front. For the first time, Coriolanus didn’t care that much if she wrinkled his clothes. When the majority of the buttons were undone, her dress slid down her body and landed in a large heap at her feet. What was left under the dress was [Y/N] in no bra (which Coriolanus had not expected, even under the strapless gown) and alarmingly red lace panties, stockings and garters (also unexpected). “I… Wow,” He said cooly. His eyes raked hungrily down her body. Coriolanus had never seen so much of it at once before. “Is there a bra that goes with this?”

“Mhmm,” [Y/N] nodded shyly.

“Hm, I think I would like to see it sometime. This isn’t half bad, though,” He said. He could Coriolanus’ large hands his hands slid down her chest. His hands held her breasts firmly. His eyes widen watching her nipples pebble under the touch of his thumbs. “Why’d you wear this?”

The lingerie wasn’t the most stunning set he had ever seen—it seemed more practical than anything else— though, he could fix that. Coriolanus felt the crotch of his pants tighten at the prospect, knowing that she was already into wearing such things. He was going to call for a lingerie catalog in the morning and buy all of it.

“It’s most of what I wear. I—I like it.”

“I’ll remember,” Coriolanus nodded. She was confident he would remember. She probably wouldn’t remember saying it, though.

Coriolanus stared down at their hardwood floors. He hated hardwood. It creaked too much and only looked good with an abundance of maintenance. Coriolanus wanted [Y/N] to suck him off as soon as possible and figured that she would probably be appreciative of getting it over with faster, but his mind was racing thinking about the unsightly bruises the hardwood entryway would leave on her knees.

Then the bedroom had the issue of the rug and the rugburn that would give. Further, which bedroom would they go to? Coriolanus hated that [Y/N] insisted on staying in her own room. He would have to fix that. She was clearly just as exciting as he had recalled from childhood, it had merely taken them both a moment to get to that level of vulnerability with each other. Coriolanus decided to lead [Y/N] to his bedroom. He also decided he would insist she kneel on a pillow. He hated the look of bruised knees. It reminded him of the war.

While he pulled her along, he glanced down at her. “The tears at the party, were those real?”

[Y/N] laughed in surprise at the question. “No! Well, maybe twenty percent, if that? Because once I get started, it’s hard to stop.”

“Really?” He replied, leaning her against his open doorway. “You’re sick. I’m rather impressed. That takes a lot of… What’s the word?”

“You said ruthless earlier.”

“Yes, that too, but… It’s brilliant that you can do that at the drop of a hat. Very valuable to you. Scary for me, I’m sure.”

“… Thanks. I’ve been doing it since I was little.” [Y/N] replied dryly. She had never seen Coriolanus’ bedroom before. He had seen hers. Coriolanus thought he could barge in whenever he desired. His own room was previously off limits. [Y/N] figured it wouldn’t have been off limits had she wanted to have sex with him before now.

The room was clean, neat and lacking personal items almost entirely. There was a red rug, a vase of white roses on the nightstand and a small desk for when he took his work to bed with him. The bed, specifically, was enormous. It was piled high with pillow after pillow and the softest white sheets she could imagine. It made the bed she had spent all these weeks in look like a joke.

“Yes, as I recall, you were the fucking… crybaby in school until we were fourteen. And you mean to tell me it was fake?” Coriolanus threw his least favorite pillow on the floor for [Y/N]’s knees with a hushed thump.

“I mean, yes.”

“Why?”

“I like the attention.” [Y/N] said plainly. They both knew she wouldn’t have been so open about it without the alcohol, but boy, did Coriolanus desire this version of her. He saw her in that moment, standing mostly nude in his bedroom. He saw her for the first time for what she was. She was real. [Y/N] was a real person made up of a mess of contradictions. She was a very calculating person. Coriolanus saw that ruthlessness and that icy deadness to her. That was exactly the thing he thought he could love the most about her.

“Freak. What else can you do?”

“I dunno. I just… Do what gets me ahead. Don’t we all, Coriolanus? And, uh, when I see someone I don’t like, instead of saying ‘good to see you’ when they say ‘good to see you,’ I say, ‘yes! To see you!’ And I kind of mumble so it’s not obvious that I’m incapable of saying ‘oh yeah, nice to see you.’ You know I hate pleasantries.”

“Freak,” Coriolanus repeated with a smile. “No pleasantries then, get on your knees.”

[Y/N] walked the few steps towards towards the pillow he had thrown down and sank to her knees on it. She was clumsy when she was drinking, Coriolanus thought. More often than not, she was violently ungraceful more often than not. Coriolanus had rarely seen her be graceful at all. He liked that. He thought he’d moments of clumsiness and carelessness were alluring. [Y/N] looked helpless to him sometimes and he admired that. He wanted to be the thing that held together her broken and unsure nature. He thought of all the things he might have to help her accomplish in their future shared life together.

Coriolanus could see himself reaching easily for things she could not reach in the kitchen. He could see her being unable to lace up her winter boots due to the tightness of her dress, so he would get on his knees and do it for her. If she tripped on the sidewalk, he would pull her to her feet. If [Y/N] was too drunk to get up the stairs, he would carry her. When some strange man dared to look at her the wrong way, Coriolanus would kill him. She seemed so fragile and needy to him. Coriolanus loved that.

He needed her to need him. He wanted to be the only thing she ever need.

She was to be his.

“Stop looking at me,” She said. “Let’s get this over with.”

“Wow, that kind of talk really gets me hard.” Coriolanus walked towards her, undoing his black leather belt and tossing his coat on the floor. She thought about the amount of excess he would afford her if he cared so little for his own possessions to leave them on the floor. [Y/N] thought about her own position on his floor briefly.

“We agreed no pleasantries.”

“Come on, you’re going to be mine for the rest of our lives. At least let me look at you.”

[Y/N] tipped her head down with a frustrated sigh. He stared wolfishly at her as she knelt half-bare on his floor. She couldn’t help but blush at how exposed she felt. [Y/N] felt more on display and exposed in front of one man, the man she was to marry, than she did in front of every guest at the party earlier in the night.

“Don’t look away from me,” Coriolanus said firmly. “Those eyes are too beautiful to look at the ground like that.”

She looked back up at him begrudgingly, her eyes wide with fear, or lust. She had no choice but to watch Coriolanus popped open the button of his trousers open. [Y/N] could see the imprint of his dick against his thigh. He rubbed himself through his pants for a moment. [Y/N] swallowed nervously. Coriolanus was a broad, imposing man. The size of his cock shouldn’t have been surprising, but her eyes bulged all the same.

Coriolanus pulled his cock free of his pants. Logistically, [Y/N] was officially concerned about offering the blowjob. His long cock was what her the rest of her life looked like. She would surely have to get used to it eventually.

Without hesitation, [Y/N]’s mouth fell open as he approached. Her hands instinctually gripped the back of his thighs. Coriolanus, after loosening his tie, buried his hands in her once elegantly styled hair and forced himself down her throat.

Coriolanus moaned through gritted teeth in sync with [Y/N]’s gag when she took him in. There was little chance of taking all of him down her throat at once. Unsurprisingly, Coriolanus fucked hard and fast. Brutally so. [Y/N] hardly had a chance to breathe through her nose. Fortunately, at least, Coriolanus did all the work by maneuvering her face up and down on his length. He regulated the tempo and the pressure. All [Y/N] could do was try to swallow and hollow her cheeks out as best she could. Don’t think, just follow. I’ve got you, echoed in her mind.

Tears ran down her cheeks. Real ones.

“Fuck, that’s good,” Coriolanus grunted after several moments. [Y/N] raised her tongue slightly against him. Through wet eyes, she saw Coriolanus’ eyebrows lift and his forehead crease when she did. That was effective. “[Y/N]!”

The only sounds in the room after that were gagging and heavy breathing. Coriolanus’ breathing, not [Y/N]’s. She couldn’t remember the last time she was able to breathe, it felt like. She was really blowing for her life here, she could barely catch an inhale through her nose. [Y/N] felt herself get more and more lightheaded and she did all she could to keep her eyes open.

Quickly, she tapped the back of Coriolanus’ left thigh. It was universal symbol for this isn’t great for me. Coriolanus understood this signal loud and clear. He thought he would keep going, but almost immediately decided he would rather have a wife in one piece instead of a perfect blowjob and slowed his pace significantly. Like a good husband.

He got gratification from slowing down too, because he could see the relieved and grateful gleam in [Y/N]’s expression. Coriolanus had gifted her that relief. He was getting close.

“Swallow.” He choked out. [Y/N] turned her eyes up at him again to confirm his request. Coriolanus’ eyes were tightly shut. [Y/N] had no idea if this had been minutes or near an hour. Her jaw ached. She felt his cock twitch against her tongue as she sucked.

That was the last clear memory [Y/N] had that night. The build up of the alcohol that had been genetically modified to be strong enough to get one drunk faster, the stress, the sweat, the tears, the blowjob, the lightheadedness, the dancing, the fear and the anger all happening on one night culminated into a good old fashion liquor blackout.

She had brief flickers of memory instead of a picture of the night. She was unsure if Coriolanus had finished or not. [Y/N] vaguely remembered Coriolanus unhooking her garters and taking off her stockings. She could feel the clean sheet and duvet over her exhausted body. She swore she could recall Coriolanus’ arm over her her waist and his lips against her ear whispering something. If only she could remember what he said.

—

The next morning, [Y/N] woke up to the birds and the traffic noise. All of it sounded world-shatteringly loud. She felt sick to her stomach. What was that dreadful taste in her mouth? Her head pounded. Too much posca at her engagement party. Desperately, she wanted a cup of coffee. [Y/N] groped at the covers to drag them over her face to block out the morning light that filtered through the window.

Hold on.

As she pulled the covers over her head, [Y/N] realized these covers did not smell like her. They smelled of roses. That, and something else more metallic that lingered under the palatable rose smell. Coriolanus smelled like that. Coriolanus’ bed.

Buried in the comfortable duvet, she couldn’t bear to crawl out from under it. She was filled with panic. How had she ended up here? She could feel that Coriolanus wasn’t beside her, so where had he ended up? Had they slept together?

Had they slept together?

The phrase and all of its meanings bounced around in her head. Her hand slid down her body. She had no top on. That was a bad sign. Her hand continued further down her body and landed on lace underwear. She exhaled and let her hand flop back down on the bed. From another room, probably the living room, [Y/N] heard the phone ring. She wished it would stop. [Y/N] rose from bed with some difficulty.

It was clear upon standing up that the only thing that would make her feel better was vomiting. She dashed madly for Coriolanus’ en suite bathroom and knelt in front of the toilet, empty the contents of her stomach for a good couple of minutes. The pressure of her headache decreased afterwards, but the terrible taste in her mouth grew. [Y/N] flushed the toilet and stood in front of the mirror. She had never looked this bad in her life.

Dark ringed eyes, leaking leftover makeup and smeared lipstick, a bold hickey on her neck like a seventeen year old. What had she done?

[Y/N] grabbed Coriolanus’ burgundy robe off the back of his bathroom door and cinched it around her waist. She walked back through his bedroom. Her knees burned a bit with each step. Maybe from the heels she had worn the night before. Her eyes landed on the flat pillow on the floor right next to Coriolanus’ belt. This seemed like a bad omen.

Suspiciously, [Y/N] walked into the too bright hallway light. [Y/N] stumbled to her own bathroom and frantically brushed her teeth before facing Coriolanus. It hurt to hold her jaw open to brush her molars, but anything to rid herself of the salty, stale taste that had taken up residence. Finally then, she moved into the living room.

There was Coriolanus smiling on the couch like he was most mornings after some sort of party. His hair lacked product and lay rich and curly against his forehead. Boxer shorts and an open dress shirt with the sleeves pushed up left little up to the imagination about his body. He was so pale that he practically reflected the sunlight from the open window back at her like a mirror. Coriolanus was perfect, even first thing. How annoying.

“What time is it?” [Y/N] croaked hoarsely. Coriolanus nearly knocked his mug of bitter coffee off the end table in surprise as he reached for the remote. He abruptly clicked off the television.

“Eleven. There about,” Coriolanus replied, vocally calmer than his body would betray. He rose from the mauve couch and moved to [Y/N]. He ran his hand down the sleeve of his robe that she wore. “Is this mine?” He asked softly.

“Yes, sorry. It was all I could find. I’ll go swap it for—“

“Please. What is mine, is yours,” Coriolanus interrupted. “It suits you,” he said with a hand running across his own gold CSB monogram on the breast pocket of the robe she wore. “How did you sleep?”

“Fine, I suppose,” but what she really wanted to say was ‘what did we do last night?’ “And you?”

Coriolanus chanced an animalistic smile. “Last night, you said no more pleasantries.”

[Y/N] scanned her brain for a memory of saying that. She did not remember that phrase specifically, but she did catch a lot more glimpses of her night in her mind’s eye. [Y/N]’s strongest images were her mother’s shocked eyes, the empty glasses of posca, Coriolanus with a red handprint on his cheek, and his hard cock at her eye level.

“Coriolanus, what did I do?” [Y/N] asked, realizing exactly what she had done.

“Which part?” Coriolanus asked cautiously, sliding his hands around her waist and pulling her close. Coriolanus wanted her to feel held and ravished for a moment since he knew she would go ballistic at what was on the TV, in the newspaper, and on the lips of everyone in town. She felt like a still from an old moving picture; being held like that.

“How bad?”

“Hm? Oh, your mouth was lovely—“ he tried to expertly redirect with an innuendo.

That assumption of what they had done had been correct. Damn. “No, shut up, stop. The… The TV, the news, the—“

“Do you want to know?”

[Y/N] felt like deflating. It must have been bad. She thought back to how he had turned off the television so fast when she walked in. “I… Will I like what I see?”

“How about we sit down, Darling?”

Coriolanus sat [Y/N] down gently on the middle cushion of the couch and folded his lanky legs into the seat to her right. She looked worried. Coriolanus hated watching other people worry, it was distracting for him and often created too many new problems. He swallowed down the urge to snap at her for pouting like that. He hated pouting too considering how unproductive it was. The blonde man reached his right hand out and used a pointer finger and thumb to tip [Y/N]’s chin up so she was forced to look him in the eye. “Hey,” he said calmly. “Any press is good press.” Coriolanus repeated their mantra from the night prior.

[Y/N] inhaled through her nose. “Any press is good press.” She agreed. Coriolanus nodded and pressed a dutiful kiss to her temple to praise her for that answer. [Y/N] stared at the dark and glassy TV screen. Coriolanus clicked it on.

A fuchsia haired newswoman sat behind a desk with the regular Capitol News studio set up for an morning gossip show. The headline was plastered on a chiron in the lower third of the screen: ‘SNOW HEIR’S GIRL OUT OF CONTROL.’ In the top right hand corner of the frame was a photo of [Y/N] sobbing on her knees in front of Coriolanus’ who wiped her tears. [Y/N] wasn’t able to listen to the grating anchorwoman who was speculating about whether or not Coriolanus should send [Y/N] to rehab.

Coriolanus watched [Y/N] watch herself on TV. He grew uncomfortable when he couldn’t automatically read her expression. He had prepared himself for some tears and a temper tantrum, but neither came.

“What are you thinking about?” Coriolanus asked her. [Y/N] was too still. She didn’t respond quickly. “[Y/N]?” Coriolanus nudged her with his elbow. “What are you thinking about?”

“The headline.” She finally replied.

Coriolanus bit his bottom lip. He kept his voice as level as she had. “Okay. What about the headline?” He asked.

“Well, it isn’t very good, is it?”

“What?”

“It’s too plain.”

Coriolanus narrowed his eyes. “It’s too plain?”

[Y/N] nodded slowly. She finally ripped her eyes away from the television set and looked up at him. “It’s informative, but it’s not eye catching beyond being alarmist,” She replied. [Y/N] pointed at the TV, smiling. “That’s my picture. That’s us up there, Coryo, and that’s the best headline they could come up with? It’s weak.”

Coriolanus couldn’t recall her calling him Coryo before, even when [Y/N] had heard it from friends, family and classmates. She was saying something. He should have been paying better attention, but [Y/N] looked lovely wearing his robe. “Coryo, are you listening to me?”

He wasn’t. Too bad. Coryo. “I got distracted, I’m sorry, Darling. You were saying?”

“I said, please get me a piece of paper and a pencil. I want to work on something better and call in a suggestion for a correction since obviously—Mmph!“

[Y/N] sentence was never finished. Coriolanus leaned in towards her face and slammed his lips against hers hungrily. Habitually, [Y/N] grabbed his biceps as they toppled flat back onto the couch. Coriolanus wasted little time pressing the tip of his tongue against her lips aggressively. He knew he gave into an open-mouthed makeout too easily, but it was so much fun.

Both pulled back after some time for a breath. “Coriolanus…” [Y/N] panted.

“Coryo, please. Nobody calls me that anymore.” He said, staring down at her.

“Coryo, I want a pencil and a piece of paper.”

“You’re crazy. You want to call in a correction on a story about yourself because you want to make it worse. You’re beautiful. I don’t tell you that enough.”

“Then tell me some more after you get me—“

“Not yet,” Coriolanus said. His hands untied her robe like she was a gift box. The best present to come out of this engagement party, certainly. “[Y/N], do you know what you did last night?”

“A few things, at least.”

“Very funny. I mean…” Coriolanus sighed. His hormones raced. He could barely make eye contact with her since his eyes were drawn elsewhere. “I mean, you bulldozed your whole life. You Thirteen’d your life off the map.” he said. She nodded. She shivered at the reality of his statement. [Y/N] had nothing left but ashes. She had burned almost every bridge she had.

Except him.

“Not the part with you,” [Y/N] said. She smiled. She said it to please Coriolanus and it seemed to work. He was much easier to play than she thought he was. “You’re all I’ve got left, Coryo.” That was absolutely true. For better or worse, Coriolanus was inevitable.

“Let me take care of you,” Coriolanus said. “You’re about to be my wife. There’s no one else you need. You’re mine. I’m not going to let you fall through the cracks.” He said.

“Promise you won’t?”

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” Coriolanus said honestly, but he didn’t feel strongly enough to really promise. “Do you like these panties?”

“Yes.”

“Shame. I’ll buy you a new set.” There was a horrible tearing sound and after that, Coriolanus’ mouth was on [Y/N]’s pussy. He licked and sucked for all he was worth.

[Y/N] did not expect Coriolanus to be good at this. All this time, she had disallowed him from touching her because she thought he would be a selfish lover. There was still potential that he was, but fuck, Coriolanus sure was good for this. His long thin nose bumped her clit as he pressed his tongue deeper into her folds and she moaned. Her hands sank into his curls.

“Don’t touch my hair.” Coriolanus said into her cunt.

“No,” She said, pulling on his hair. Coriolanus was irked, but let her do it anyway. He had never felt pleasure from someone tugging his hair like that before. [Y/N] wrapped her legs around his shoulders. Coriolanus used his strong, callused hands to hold her thighs open. He was going to make her cum with only his greedy mouth, like she had for him last night.

Quid pro quo. That was the nature of their whole operation, Coriolanus realized. It was fine by him.

It was still early and Coriolanus had the day off. He was ready to make up for lost time. He was going to make her cum in every room of their home. Coriolanus was addicted to her taste. He was addicted to her mind. All of this felt cloaked in danger; it was too personal for Coriolanus. Oh well.

By day’s end, [Y/N] wouldn’t be able to climb out of bed for a couple of days on her own. Coriolanus’ constant tongue-fucking pulling orgasms from her had turned her brain to mush, but not before she was able to force Coriolanus off and jot down a few headlines of her own while he marked up her neck.

‘GAMEMAKER’S FIANCÉE: FREAK OR FOOL?’

‘CAPITOL’S GOLDEN BOY FALLS FOR BAD GIRL.’

‘ALLEGED CHEATING SCANDAL SHAKES CAPITOL YOUTH.’

‘GAMEMAKER WALKS OUT THE VICTOR AFTER PARTY DISASTER.’

‘’WEDDING IS OFF’ SPECULATES PLINTH FAMILY.’

‘GAMEMAKER’S FIANCÉE LIES, CHEATS AND STEALS THE NIGHT.’

‘SNOW’S FALLING (STANDARDS).’

Half of her ideas dripped as moans while Coriolanus worked on her pussy. She was weak enough to do little more than pull his hair and try to clench around whatever he pushed into her. [Y/N]’s orgasm-addled mind finally comprehended that Coriolanus made her better. He made her more creative, bolder, and free from every burden except him. Finally, willingly, [Y/N] gave Coriolanus the last thing she had to give: Herself.

It felt fucking incredible

TAGLIST:

@badwicht @stelleduarte @cinnamongirl127 @prettyppetty @soulessien @bejeweledreverie @jjstyles @arminsarlerts @chmpgneprblem @co1dmountains @miscellaneousmoonchild @lille999 @pumkinnxsmut @taykorsyogurt @ndycrls @watermelonharry @nananarwhal @ohantonia @catlover420sstuff @justaproudslytherpuff @notarabellasstuff @scarytiger111 @zucchinimalfoy @secretsicanthideanymore @h-l-vlovesvintage @dannydevsbbg @clintsupremacy @lookclosernow @10ava01 @or-was-it-just-a-dream @lucielsstuff @fairyydvst @spencereidbasis @a-mellifluous-life @daenerysqueenofhearts @heavqn @dangelnleif @lapisthelovely

apologies again for the tags that did NOT work.

[illyrianbitch]

-ˋˏ MASTERLIST ˎˊ-

✨ indicates smut ♡ indicates a series ✰ indicates a one shot ↯ installment of series but can be read as stand-alone last updated: 4/17/24

Azriel

♡ . — Beneath the Ashes of Our Broken Oaths

After abandoning the refuge of Velaris, you, Morrigan’s sister, returned to the forsaken Hewn City fueled by a vision for a better future. Now, your estranged family seeks your help when rumors of rebellion spread at a time of utmost inconvenience. Torn between your anger and a desire to protect the good, you begrudgingly agree and are forced to face memories of a past life and the unsettling presence of Azriel– the first man you ever loved.

♡ . — The Anatomy of Dependence

You and Azriel are drawn together by an unbreakable bond, encountering obstacles and triumphs across the centuries and finding your way back to each other again and again.

✰. —Death and His Reaper

After suffering a devastating injury in battle, Azriel finds himself on the brink of life and death where he meets you, The Mother's reaper.

↯. — Back to Our Roots

With the Acheron sisters out of town, you and your family plan for a quiet night in— just like old times.

✰. —Where I Left My Lover

After a brush with death, Azriel makes a difficult decision to protect you.

✰. —What We Make of What We're Made

When Azriel overhears Feyre's concern about your transition to fae life, he agrees to check on you.

✰. —An Education in Malice✨

With the sharp tongue of your notorious family, you are Azriel's most tantalizing challenge yet. It only takes one small meeting before you both realize that the line between hate and desire is dangerously thin. Part Two✨

✰. —When the Heart is Still Longing

Azriel thought you were the one. Now, he can’t move on

Cassian

♡ ↯. —And I'm Thinking About Your Lips ✨

You and Cassian have been best friends since you were teenagers-- just friends. But one night at Rita's changes everything and now you cant breathe when you're around him and he can't stop imagining how you'd taste. 18+ SMUT! porn with "plot" aka: best friends to lovers ↯ Part One, ↯ Part Two

↯. — A Hobby for Two

Cassian surprises you with a small gift. You spend the night teaching him how to properly enjoy it.

✰. —A Place For Dying

A mission with Cassian goes terribly wrong.

✰. —Words of Affirmation

Even the Lord of Bloodshed gets insecure sometimes. As his mate, you always know the right words to say.

Rhysand

✰. —Insatiable ✨

There are countless reasons why you and Rhysand don’t work… but those reasons don’t seem so important when you’re tipsy in a bathroom with him inside you. 18+ SMUT!

Lucien Vanserra

♡ . — Hidden Things

Following a cryptic vision from Elain, Lucien finds himself seeking out an enchanted artifact at your shop in the heart of the Day Court. What he finds instead is a profound connection with you—and a version of himself he believed he had lost.

Eris Vanserra

♡ . — A House of Hunger

Every Autumn court citizen is hungry for something; beasts starved for influence, desperate for control, ravenous for power. Your tastes are no different—albeit a bit specific. It's a deep craving that boils in the pit of your stomach, hot and heavy, all consuming. You’re hungry for revenge.

Bat-Boys (Reader x BatBoys)

✰. —Worth It

It can be hard to remember why you’ve put up with your best friends for centuries-- until they remind you why they're worth it.

✰. —A Helping Hand

Even most powerful males in Prythian need relationship advice from their best friend.

Mini-Series

♡ . — Mirthroot Mini-Series

Between dodging death and saving Prythian, its always nice to make time and enjoy one of The Mother's greatest creations: mirthroot. Reader x ACOTAR Characters

[pascallftv]

eighties baby

summary: your parents throw an 80’s themed party in their mansion. you try your best to contain your infatuation for joel, your dad’s best friend. you and your friend get a little too drunk and joel decides to teach you a lesson.

content: joel miller x reader, no outbreak, little plot, dbf!joel, reader in her twenties

warnings: CONTAINS MATURE CONTENT. 18+ mdni!, age gap is 20s/50, piv unprotected sex, oral (f receiving), cream pie, doggystyle, dirty talk, choking

an: i’m baaaaaack ;) this was… wow! pls enjoy

“Your ass looks immaculate.”

You glance over your shoulder in the reflection of the mirror, locking eyes with your best friend. She’s giving you wild eyes while biting her bottom lip that’s covered in bright red lip stick. Her makeup was done very vibrantly compared to usual; blue eyeshadow with bright pink blush.

“You don’t think it’s too short?” You ask, popping a hip to accentuate your ass further under your very tight and very short mini skirt. Typically, you wouldn’t mind if a little bit of cheek was hanging out the bottom of your skirt, but this was your parents’ party, not your typical college party. Your best friend rolled her eyes and you and laid a smack down on your ass. You yelped in surprise.

“It’s perfectly fine. It’ll be dark.” She begins, then her voice lowers. “Plus, Joel will want to eat you alive when he sees you in it.”

You bite your bottom lip to fight back a grin. She knew you too well. You sighed and placed your hands on your hip, your head turning to the side as your further inspect your outfit in your full length mirror. You decided to go with an 80s glam rock look instead of the typical vibrant colors from the time period. You were wearing a tight black leather skirt and matching top, with knee high platform boots with silver chains on them. You had grungy black eyeshadow matched with a glossy red lip. You felt hot.

“I can’t be too obvious. You cannot let me get too drunk tonight.” You say sternly. You were talking more to yourself than anything. You knew if you drank too much alcohol you would make a fool out of yourself in front of Joel.

Joel was your father’s main man. They’d known each other for decades now. Joel was a stern man; the crinkles by his eyes from his fifty years of wisdom weren’t usually intensified by joy, more by scowls. You’d like to think at one point he was a light hearted man, but you can’t help but wonder what in his years turned him into such a sour puss. You could count on one hand the amount of times you’d seen him genuinely laugh. It was an extremely rare occurrence, but the times he had, it was the most amazing sound you’d ever heard.

“Fine. But this is your chance to act as unhinged as you want because in the morning you can blame the alcohol.” Your best friend winks at you, patting you once more on the bum.

“You’re a terrible influence.” You turn to face her. Your shorter friend stares up at you with a devilish grin and runs her thumb along your bottom lip, cleaning up your red lipstick.

“We should head down there, take a couple shots, scope it out.” She suggests, grabbing your perfume off your vanity and spritzing it on the both of you a few times. You nod in agreement, and check your outfit in the mirror one last time. You take a deep breath and grab your friend’s hand to leave your bedroom. The 80s music was already thumping from your parent’s massive surround sound speakers downstairs. The lights were off, with the sole light source being a couple lamps and some red lights your parents used for their annual Halloween party.

When you made it downstairs, the house was already packed out. The entire neighborhood was in your parents’ house. All of the couples in the neighborhood were in attendance, as well as their children (all in their twenties or older). If you squinted hard enough, it even looked like a college party. The lighting was just enough to see the basic traits of everyone’s faces, most of them being somewhat recognizable to you. You had just graduated from college earlier that month, so you were home temporarily until you found your full-time calling.

Your friend dragged you to the kitchen where all of the alcohol was stashed. On the island, there was a lineup of liquor with the appropriate mixers. She decided to pour you each a hefty shot of tequila, as well as a lime wedge. You absolutely hated any dark liquor, and unfortunately vodka had been tainted for you in your time at college, so tequila was the sole surviving option for you. You didn’t mind the taste of tequila, but the catch was its effect on you. Unlike other forms of liquor, tequila made you incredibly horny. After around 4 tequila shots, you had the tendency to shed off articles of clothing like you were battling a heat wave. This made you nervous considering you knew Joel would be in attendance; however, as your friend said, you can use the liquor as a scapegoat if it got that bad.

As you and your friend shot back your tequila, you began wondering where Joel could be. The party started over thirty minutes ago, and it was uncharacteristic of him to be late, meaning he was in the house somewhere. The thought alone made your skin crawl.

“One more.” Your friend called out over the music, pouring you each another hefty shot. Your eyes got wide. You knew you’d have to take a break from drinking after this shot, otherwise you’d end up butt ass naked in the middle of this party.

Another hefty shot later, and you were already feeling the buzz from the alcohol. Your veins felt tingly and your limbs felt weightless. You each made yourselves your mixed drink of choice, and decided to make your way out to the makeshift dance floor in your parents’ spacious living room. They had a portable disco floor, as well as a disco ball hung from the ceiling. No one took parties more seriously than your parents.

Your friend grabbed your arm and pulled you onto the dance floor, with “Talking in Your Sleep” by the Romantics blasting from the speakers. Your eyes wandered around the room trying to find the brown eyed man you’d be longing to see. Sure enough, you spotted him. He was sitting on the sofa, leaning back with his legs spread out in front of him. He had a glass of what appeared to be whiskey in his hand, resting on his thigh. You gulped when you noticed he was already looking at you. You quickly looked away and took a sip of the tequila sour you half-assed at the kitchen makeshift bar.

You made eye contact with your friend, and you gave her panic eyes to let her know you found him. She caught on almost instantly, and took that as a queue to scoot out of your line of sight. She leaned closer to you to say something in your ear.

“Go sit next to him.” She suggested loudly into your ear.

You shot her a look of unease. Wouldn’t that be too obvious? You shook your head no rapidly in response. It was too early in the night for you to do something as ballsy as that.

After about half an hour, your friend’s drink was empty and she was dragging you back to the kitchen. Your drink was still three-fourths full. Your stomach was bubbling with anxiety knowing that Joel had a direct view of you in your anything but conservative outfit. Besides, you were scared for your actions if you ingested any more alcohol.

Your friend took two more shots and mixed herself another strong cocktail. You knew she was going to be shitfaced in the matter of minutes. You rub your forehead and sigh. It’s going to be a quick night for her.

Your predictions were correct.

Forty minutes passed and her cocktail was gone, and so was she. She was so plastered that she couldn’t stand up straight, constantly grabbing your arm for support. You looked around the room and immediately made eye contact with Joel. He’s watching the both of you intensely, his head nodding over to the side as he observes your friend stumbling around. You’re fully embarrassed at how gone your friend was already. Your stomach flips when you noticed Joel was lifting himself off his spot in the sofa, making his way towards the both of you. He grabbed onto your arm, a look of concern crossing his features.

“Come on.” He said shortly, moving his arm from yours to hers, helping her stand up somewhat straight. “Let’s take her upstairs.”

You glanced down at your friend and her head was lulling to the side, her eyes fluttering shut. There was no salvaging her. You nodded in response to Joel and helped him practically carry your friend upstairs to your bedroom. After her nearly falling every few steps, you finally make it to your bedroom. You noticed Joel’s eyes wandering around the walls of your room as he took in the decor. You had various band posters still hanging in your childhood bedroom, many of them being 60’s rock bands that your dad showed you. You gently lay your friend down onto your bed, and almost immediately she’s snoring.

“Jesus Christ, I’m so sorry about this, Joel.” You mutter, looking up at him with apologetic eyes. You absentmindedly toy with your hands in front of you. Despite the shots you did take, you were still feeling nervous; the liquid courage wasn’t doing its job.

Joel stepped closer to you and shook his head. His brown eyes were soft and his eyebrows were furrowed.

“It was nothing, really.” He assures you, taking a glance back at your friend. He was amused at just how fast your friend fell asleep. He turned back to look at you and felt something flutter deep in his gut.

He had kept his eyes in you all night. He couldn’t believe how grown you were. Sure, he had known you since you were young, but you were a woman now. You had always been pretty, but now, you were stunning. He felt disgusting about it. Of all the women in his life, none of them compared to you, his best friend’s daughter. The entire night he had watched the way your latex skirt was fighting to stay over the plump flesh of your ass. Your top wasn’t much better; it left little to the imagination, your nipples peaking through the thin fabric of it. You were genuinely perfect in his eyes, and it was causing him the most intense moral battle of his life.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” You asked quietly. His eyes were wandering over you, but he was saying nothing. It looked as though he was fighting something internally.

“What are you doing here?” He asked blandly, ignoring your question entirely. You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion.

“What do you mean?” You pondered, crossing your arms over your chest, unintentionally pushing your boobs up further, placing them in perfect display for Joel.

“You could be anywhere, yet here you are drunk at your parents’ party.” He said, glancing down at your chest, hoping you wouldn’t notice, but of course you did. You chuckle in response.

“I just graduated college, Joel. I’m home temporarily until I can find something full time. What’s the matter? Am I inconveniencing you somehow?” You asked with pure sass.

“Well not entirely, no.” Joel says, stepping closer to you. “You’d think you and your friend would have a little self control considering the environment. This isn’t college, sweetheart.”

“I beg your pardon? I’ve barely drank anything. For god sake I helped you carry her.” You get defensive, emphatically gesturing towards your friend that’s passed out in your bed. “And unfortunately she could’ve been way worse than this.”

“You should’ve stopped her before she was fighting to keep herself standing.” Joel scolded you, his brows furrowing further.

“Aww what’s wrong, Joel? You have no children of your own so you have to parent me?” You snarled, stepping another inch closer to him. Joel frowns, his fist clenching at his hip.

“You’re a little fucking brat, ain’t ya?” Joel growls, getting centimeters away from your face. He was so close that you could feel his hot breath on the skin of your face.

“And you’re just a dickhead, huh?” You fire back.

Joel grabbed you by the forearm and tugged you towards your bedroom door. Before you could protest, Joel was dragging you down the hall to a spare bedroom. He swiftly pulled you inside and locked the door behind you. He grabbed you firmly by the throat, squeezing just the sides as to not restrict your airflow.

“Bit of an attitude problem, eh?” Joel spoke sternly. You gulped, gawking up into his crinkled eyes. “Might just have to sort you out.”

“What are you doing, Joel?” You squeaked out, your hand reaching up to grab ahold of his forearm. His face moved closer to yours, his eyes moving down to your crimson lips.

“I can only imagine you put on this poor excuse of a skirt to try and get someone to pay attention to you in the way you’re craving. You’re a little fucking whore, aren’t you?” Joel growls, his free hand moving down to your skirt, pulling it away from your body so it smacked back against your plump thighs. You gasped. You didn’t know how to respond to that. Was this actually happening?

After years of secretly fantasizing about a moment like this, it was finally happening, and you were flabbergasted.

“Answer me. Tell me what you are.” His grip around your throat slowly moved up to your jaw, his fingers squeezing your cheeks, making your lips purse.

You groaned in response, a hand trailing up Joel’s torso to his chest, laying a flat hand against him. His heart was beating rapidly. You glanced down and noticed the bulge straining against his vintage Levi jeans. He was enjoying this a little too much. You forced your face away from his grip, grabbing his wrist as hard as you could.

“I’m not a whore.” Your words were laced with venom. You were frustrated. Not because of the substance of Joel’s words, but because you were so fucking aroused. If it were anyone else, you probably would’ve planted a firm kick in their groin or sucker punched them in the lip. His words were disgusting, but you were eating it up.

“No?” Joel cocked his head at you. His free hand snakes up under your skirt, his fingertips pressing against your folds. His fingers were met with moisture. Your panties were soaked through. His gaze fell to his hand, then back up to your doe eyes. He smirked devilishly at you, his hand moving to your face. With his thumb, he pawed at your bottom lip, pulling it away from your teeth.

“Your cunt says otherwise, darling.” He muttered, his breath fanning across your face once more. You swallowed hard. You averted your eyes from him, his gaze making you feel entirely too hot.

“My parents.” You blurted out, your gaze returning to his momentarily. He swallows, his thumb still sitting by your mouth.

“They won’t know.” He said. You retracted your grip from his forearm, and he took that as an opportunity to run his finger up the outside of your arm painfully slow. “What’s wrong sweetheart? Scared of your daddy finding out?”

Your lips parted, a harsh exhale escaping your throat. Your body was on fire, your skin littered with goosebumps from Joel’s touch. To any normal person, this situation would be incredibly alarming. Yes, your moral compass was clawing at the back of your mind, but you craved interaction. Your morals were out the window, your desires taking superiority.

“Yes.” You whispered, your gaze falling to Joel’s lips. They were tempting you.

“If you don’t want this, stop me.”

Joel’s hand moved from your arm back towards the bottom of your skirt, pushing it up over your thighs, your red panties on full display.

“Fuck.” Joel growled, his fingertips grazing your mound through the lacy fabric. He pushed your panties to the side, his finger running through your folds, collecting your arousal. “Stop me, angel.” He teased.

His fingertip ghosted over your sensitive clit, your legs jolting in response, a whimper leaving your mouth. His mouth hovered over the soft skin of your neck, his breath stirring up goosebumps.

“S’matter sweetheart?” Joel muttered, planting a soft kiss to your throat. “Tell me what you need.”

“N-need more.” You said, your brows furrowing in desperation. You glanced down at his hand between your legs, your lower gut fluttering at the sight. He applied more pressure to the circles he was dancing over your swollen bud, the pleasure sending your head to lull backwards. You whimpered more, your legs beginning to feel like jello.

“You sound so pathetic.” Joel spat, working his fingers faster on your clit. You exhaled unevenly, your hand coming down on Joel’s bicep for stability.

You felt that familiar white heat beginning to ignite low in your belly, your cunt throbbing steadily. Your eyes squeezed shut. You were close— but Joel knew that. He wasn’t going to let you come just yet. Without warning, Joel halted his actions, his hand leaving your folds. You could’ve cried in that moment. Joel grabbed your forearm and tugged you towards the bed, pushing you down onto the duvet.

“Joel, please. I need to cum.” You whined, your head falling back into the soft mattress. Joel purses his lips at you, his hand running along the smooth skin of your leg, inching closer to where you needed his attention most.

“Jesus, sweetheart. At least you know what you want.” Joel said, squeezing the flesh of your thigh with the rough skin of his palm. “Here’s how this is gonna go. First I’m going to taste you. Then, I’m going to fuck you until you forget how to think. Got it?”

You nodded pathetically, grinding your hips down onto the mattress, desperate for some sort of friction. Joel ghosted his hands over your thighs to the seam of your latex skirt, gripping it between his fingers. In a swift motion, Joel tugged the skirt down your legs and off your body, tossing it somewhere on the floor. He left your boots on, not quite wanting to get rid of them yet. Your pussy looks so pretty underneath the transparent lace fabric of your thong. It left little to nothing to Joel’s imagination. Your breasts were spilling out of your black top, your areolas peaking out. You looked breathtaking.

“Fuck, angel. I wish you could see yourself. So pretty for me.” Joel muttered, lowering his face to your groin, pressing a soft kiss to your inner thigh. He ran his large hand up the back of your thigh, squeezing every few inches. You bite your lip and you stared down at his face as he littered kissed across your thighs. His salt and pepper beard added even more texture to the sensations you were feeling. He slipped his fingers underneath the fabric of your panties and slowly pulled them down your tights and over your boots, leaving your heat bare. Joel lowered his face down to your core, his hot breath fanning over your sensitive skin. He pressed a kiss to your pelvic bone, then ghosted his lips in a line down to your sensitive bud. He planted another kiss over your clit, taking his sweet time teasing you. Your pussy was throbbing at this point, desperate for any sort of touch.

“Joel please.” You pleaded, grinding your hips up towards his mouth. “I need your tongue.”

“Good girl.” He said, lowering his tongue to your folds, licking a wet stripe up your vulva, tracing a circle around your clit, sucking down on it gently. He moaned into your flesh, the vibrations sending a chill down your spine. His tongue began to work faster, flicking up and down and side to side over your clit. He brought his middle finger to your opening, ghosting circular motions over it, before slowly pushing it inside of you. You exhaled deeply at the sensation. He began pumping his finger rhythmically in and out of you, paying special attention to curl his fingertip upwards to brush against your g spot. As he felt your walls growing accustom to the girth of his singular digit, he added a second finger, pumping faster. Just from his fingers and tongue, you already felt fucked out of your mind. The pleasure sent shocks down your legs and up your spine, your head rolling back into the mattress in euphoria. A quiet moan slipped through your cherry lips, your fists grabbing the bedding for leverage to cope with the immense pleasure coursing through you.

“Joel.” You whimpered, one of your hands jetting down to grab at his hair as he lapped at your wet heat. His soft brown eyes flicked up to meet yours at the sound of your voice. Your moan went straight to his already throbbing cock.

“Christ, baby.” He groaned, lifting away from your core to unbutton his Levi’s. His hand fumbled with the zipper to get them off as fast as he could. The anticipation was killing him; he was so hard that it was beginning to hurt. He needed inside you immediately.

Finally managing to slide his jeans down his legs, his cock was straining against his boxers. The tent was revealing in itself; you already knew he was packing a punch. It felt painfully slow, but finally Joel slipped off his boxers, revealing his erection. Leaking at the tip, he brushed his thumb over, cleaning up the precum that had accumulated from tasting you.

You sat up from the mattress and grabbed his face in your hands, pressing your lips to his. Your lips moved against his in a passionate rush. You could taste yourself on his lips. Another whimper rose from your throat, the moan vibrating off his lips. The sound of your wet kiss filled the room as he lowered his body over yours to lay you back down against the bed. His hand moved from his cock to your breast, pulling it out of your top and giving it a firm squeeze.

“Fuck.” He muttered against your lips as you rocked your hips into his. You needed his touch desperately.

“Fuck me.” You breathed out, pulling away to look him in the eye. “Please.”

That was all Joel needed to hear. He reached down to take his cock in his hand again, guiding his top to press into your folds. He ran back and forth against your slick, his precum mixing with your arousal. His eyebrows furrowed in pleasure as he felt your wetness already beginning to coat him. His eyes lifted back to meet yours as he began to slowly press his tip into your entrance, the stretch already making you feel crazed. Your lips parted, an exhale escaping your lips as he pressed himself into your further. Your hands darted up to grab onto his biceps as leverage. He lowered down to your lips, pressing a slow, gentle kiss to them as he pushed his length inside of you to the hilt. Another moan escaped your lips.

“Y’okay?” Joel breathed out, slowly pumping in and out of you, allowing you time to adjust. You nodded your head, unable to form a coherent sentence.

“More.” You begged. “I need more.”

Joel ran his hand from your thigh up your belly, dragging his finger tip slowly to take in every inch of your skin. He reached your neck, wrapping his calloused fingertips around your throat, carefully squeezing on the sides. He leaned down to meet your lips, taking your bottom lip between his teeth momentarily.

“So fucking needy.” He grumbled against your mouth, his eyelids fluttering closed.

Suddenly, Joel began pounding into you. His hot breath fanned over your face as he rammed in and out of you, his length reached the deepest parts of you. You gasped, your hand reached up to grab his wrist that was busy squeezing your throat. Your eyes rolled back in your head and he slammed into you over and over. You were sure he was hitting you so deep that he was nicking your cervix. Just when you thought you couldn’t be more overwhelmed with pleasure, Joel’s free hand snaked between your thighs, his thumb finding your clit, ghosting gentle circles over the sensitive nub. You squeaked out a moan, the pleasure overcoming your senses completely. Your legs began to shake from the stimulation, your lower belly muscles tensing from the overwhelming sensation. Your breath was shaking, the oxygen feeling as through it had completely left your lungs.

“F-fuck.” You stuttered as Joel thrusted into you. “I’m close.”

Joel took this as an opportunity to slide out of you, wasting no time in flipping you onto your belly, laying a hard slap against your bare ass cheek. He groaned as your ass jiggled from the slap, his hand coming back down to grab a handful of your flesh. You pressed your face down into the duvet, letting out a moan. Your pussy was throbbing from the sudden lack of attention. You wiggled your hips, nonverbally begging for Joel’s cock. He chucked, slapping your ass once more before pressing himself back at your entrance, ramming into you fully, his hips meeting your ass in a rush. He grabbed a cheek with his rough fingertips, pulling your ass apart to get a full view of himself slamming into you. Your tightest hole was on perfect display for him.

“One day I’m going to claim you here too.” Joel growled, his fingertip grazing the ring of your asshole. You gasped, your forehead coming down onto the bedding, pressing your face down into the duvet to cover your moan. “You’d like that wouldn’t you? Me claiming your tight little ass as mine?”

You nodded rapidly, a straggled breath leaving your mouth. It was so goddamn hard for your mind to focus on anything except the feeling of his tip grazing the opening of your cervix with every thrust. Once again, Joel reached his hand down to toy at your clit, bringing you closer to your climax. The white heat hit you again as your legs began to shake under you. Joel wasn’t far behind you, and his pace wasn’t easing up.

His hips met yours hard and fast, the sound of skin slapping echoing off the walls of the spare bedroom. If it weren’t for the music thumping downstairs, your sinful act would’ve already been heard throughout the entire house. Joel leaned down, kissing you against your spine, his hand kneading your ass.

“F-fuck, where do you want me? Your mouth? Or should I fill you up?” Joel grunted, his hand snaking around your front to firmly grab your breast, pinching your nipple between his fingertips.

You gasped, the stimulation for your nipple slipping you into the beginning of your orgasm. You didn’t answer him, the feeling of your impending climax completely taking over your body.

“Look at you cumming around my cock. Such a good fucking slut.” Joel growled, his pace somehow quickening further. His hand reached up to your hair, grabbing a fistful of locks and pulling your head backwards. His other hand reached around to your throat as he bent down to kiss you from the intense angle, your orgasm taking over you entirely. Your toes began to curl beneath you, your pussy clamping around Joel’s cock that was twitching deep inside you. Your pussy clenched down around his length, hugging it perfectly.

“Fuck.” Joel whimpered, his high hitting him like a train. Your spasming canal clamped down around him as he came in hot spurts, coating your walls deep inside of you. Your walls clenched around him, milking every ounce of cum from his length.

His thrusts slowed as his seed filled you up, his hands grabbing your hips for stability as he came the hardest he’d ever came in his life. He moaned as he slowly slipped his spent cock out of you, some of his release dripping out of your used up hole. The sight was intoxicating.

“Fuck.” Joel breathed out again, taking in the ruined state of your folds. He ran his fingers down your slick, mixing his cum with yours. You flinched at the sensitivity of your pussy, whining as he brushed over your clit.

You were spent. Your face was still pressed against the mattress, your ass still perched in the air. Joel’s cum was slowly leaking out of you, and you couldn’t bring yourself to move. You were too fucked out of your mind to notice that Joel had left the bed to retrieve a wet rag from the attached bathroom. You winced as he gently cleaned up the juices spilling from you.

“You look so beautiful with my cum dripping out of you.” He spoke, running a hand up and down the back of your thigh. He pressed a kiss to your sore ass cheek from where he had smacked it.

You rolled over onto your back, your tender breasts jiggling from the movement. Joel leaned down and took a breast into his mouth, gently sucking on your hardened nipple.

“As much as I’d love to stay here and fuck you all night, I should go before your daddy starts to wonder where we went.” Joel said, leaning down to press a kiss to your lips.

A pit grew deep in your gut at the thought of Joel leaving you, but you knew the nature of this interaction and it would be silly of you to expect any different. You gazed up at him and frowned.

“Don’t look at me like that.” Joel shook his head and straightened up, moving his attention to dress himself. He began buttoning his flannel that he’d taken off during your interaction at some point that you hadn’t noticed. You watched in silence as he pulled his boxers and Levi’s back up over his legs.

“I’ll see you tomorrow.” Joel said after he was fully dressed. You were still laying on the bed completely nude attempting to recover from the mindblowing sex you’d just endured. Joel walked towards the door, turning briefly to look at your one last time.

“You might want to get dressed, sweetheart. Hate to have your daddy walk in to see my cum spilling out of you.” He winked, then disappeared out of the door, leaving you alone fucked out of your mind.

[punkpandapatrixk]

🍷Scent of Your Destined Person ♦︎ Timeless Pick A Card

Come ti vidi           when I saw you M’innamorai,        I fell in love E tu sorridi            and you smiled Perchè lo sai.        because you knew

– Arrigo Boito

Somewhere in this world you and I exist. Do you remember how you always feel when you’re with me? Will you recognise me the moment your eyes lay sight upon me?

SONG: Horizon by NCT Jaehyun

MOVIE: Spirited Away (2001)

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Pile 1 – Everything I Do, I Do to Make You Happy

VIBE: Misty by NCT 127

perfume – 8 of Pentacles

At the core of their being, your Destined Person is a very earthy person. Sensual and pragmatic. Realistic and dependable. Ambitious and hardworking. I bet you they have a large amount of Earth sign influences—Taurus, Virgo, or Capricorn. Your Destined Person has a great spirit that knows how to make sacrifices for those they care about. They are such a magnanimous entity. But with this energy, they can also be quite hard on themselves. They’re not self-destructive though; just incredibly responsible and hard-working because they have big, BIG dreams!

Having said that, your Destined Person is quite a balanced person in that they know how to relax and indulge in the fruits of their labour of love. Though they are passionate and focused, your Destined Person is also quite a spiritual person, which they themselves might not be super aware of. The spiritual side of them makes them highly intuitive, and they’re the type to trust those gut instincts, so they tend to be successful in Life from courageously making bold decisions, guided by their Heart.

Your Destined Person’s spiritual side makes them dream WILD dreams nobody else dares to dream. You could say they’re rather eccentric in regards to how they’re perceived by their family, neighbours and peers. With a rather rebellious nature though, they pursue their dreams with focus and fervour. Thanks to their practicality and endurance (definitely strong Earth influences, babe), they’re able to follow through their plans and manifest their dreams rather easily. It isn’t to say they don’t sacrifice a lot though…

playdate – 9 of Swords

It’s never easy to get to the top and your Destined Person has endured quite a lot of storms Life has had to offer. In spite of their persona that may appear strong, charismatic, dependable, optimistic, and even cheerful for some, your Destined Person actually has a very soft heart. They’re empathetic and can’t stand the reality of people being mean and nasty to each other. To some extent, it breaks their heart when they witness people trample each other in the pursuit of success.

Your Destined Person is a charitable Soul who believes that a candle doesn’t lose anything by sharing its fire. Unfortunately, most Humans can’t see this. And they feel like they’re the only person in the world who’s bothered by such a thing and sometimes this makes them feel weird or weak as a person. To compensate for that sometimes-terrible feeling, your Destined Person has a tendency to push themselves even harder and sacrifice more of themselves to make other people feel good, happy (because they can’t stand absorbing other people’s sad energy, if that makes sense).

It's almost like, your Destined Person doesn’t know how to genuinely make themselves happy unless they’re being useful to those they care about. Unfortunately, due to this insane charitableness, your Destined Person has been taken advantage of quite a lot in Life. When they were a lot younger, they trusted too easily (too pure for this world). A lot of the people they used to know only saw them for their money, status, or access. Your Destined Person is quite traumatised when it comes to human relations in general but they don’t easily let this show!

a box of macarons – 3 of Cups

Tapping into your Destined Person’s energy feels, misty. They’re quite often sad but try their best to showcase a positive attitude because that’s just who they are. In some cases, they may be dwelling in a workplace or an industry where showing such emotions is not exactly appreciated. When thinking about you, your Destined Person yearns for someone who’d look into the true depths of their empathy and compassion, and still be OK with how morose they sometimes could be. They also wish for their Destined Person (you!) to offer some kind of an escape from memories of their terrible past.

When you finally pop into their Life, your Destined Person becomes engulfed in sweet but all-consuming gratitude that escapes words. They’d be speechless, or awkward, when trying to describe this gratitude they feel towards you. They have a lot of things to be grateful for and it wasn’t like their world was that bad, but there’s something about you that touches the deepest yearning in them and makes all the flowers bloom in their inner world. The whole idea of you, your sheer beingness, just the fact that you’re alive, and that you’ve found your way into their world…

How they struggle to express how much they love you XD They feel like your entire existence beats only for them, for their healing. You heal so many parts of their broken heart and restore their faith in a Life worth living. All those riches mean nothing if you’re not the one destined to marry them. They’ll be so devoted and loyal to you. There’s only you. And then your children and pets, maybe XD Your Destined Person will create a safe haven for you and your family. You will live lavishly and be gifted a lot of thoughtful gifts! All they do in this world, they do for your happiness and your children♥︎

143ML OF PURE LOVE ESSENCE🔻💛

flower bouquet – Gold Astronomer (John Dee)

home sweet home – Priestess of Divination

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Pile 2 – I Want No One Else but You

VIBE: Focus by NCT 127

perfume – 4 of Cups

To your Destined Person, you’re the dreamiest, most magical creature they have ever encountered. The moment you enter their Life, they fall in love at first sight, or at least, there’s something about you that profoundly disturbs the mundanity that they’ve been operating in for quite a while. You make them dream in more vivid colours. I think they’re going to be addicted to you quite immediately which would be hilarious to them XD They’ll be thinking about you non-stop, which makes them feel awkward. They’ll be telling themselves, ‘I’m not at an age where I should be behaving this way! Come on! Grow up, me!’

And still, they don’t mind at all being focused on only you. They enjoy that dreamy feeling all too much for them to even want to stop. ‘I love being drenched in your aroma. I like your energy. I like all that you are. You are my dream person! AAAAGGGHHH!’ They’re crazy about ways to make it with you! They don’t know what to do because they think they could be too much or too childish and they fear you might reject them. They’re thinking of ways to mature first and be really cool XD I think your Destined Person is quite silly hahahah

But as childish that may appear to you, don’t underestimate your Destined Person’s loyalty, babe~ Deeply romantic and devoted; they would not want anybody else but you. They’re thinking, ‘If I’m not with you in this incarnation, there’s no point in all that I’ve done.’ Their heart beats only for you. Your Destined Person may need some time to develop themselves when you meet, but they’re definitely not shallow. Your Destined Person has a heroic quality to them which makes them want to offer you security. All variety of security~

playdate – 9 of Pentacles Rx

So, there’s a bit about your Destined Person that may be perceived—especially by their peers, I think—as childish or unrealistic. Essentially, I think they’re a spiritual idealist. They can be quite dreamy, head in the clouds type of person. If your Destined Person is a male, I think some of their peers kinda look down on them for being… the way that they are. Your Destined Person, even when they are a male, is the type that goes home quickly to help with childcare. Your Destined Person is romantic and will prioritise you and family over workplace obligations. This is saying they will go the extra mile to prove their Love for you. They don’t care what other people say; they say, ‘Other people don’t know what Love is and that’s such a shame!’

Your Destined Person knows that Love can’t be proven with just material things. This person deeply understands that time well spent together, affection and attention, are more of a display of Love than whatever money could buy. They’re not the type of lover who’d get discouraged by other people buying their spouses bigger or shinier things. In that manner, your Destined Person has a healthy self-esteem and they really understand what kinds of things truly matter in a relationship. I think you’re going to be so happy, so emotionally secure with them!

I’m seeing that you and your Destined Person are going to enjoy visiting places like theme parks, or just parks, and you’d enjoy outdoor picnics with foods you’ve prepared or bought at the supermarket together. Just enjoying peaceful moments with a box of Belgian chocolate you both love. The most important thing is the quality time you’re spending together. Something like that. I think your love life is definitely all about the cute, sweet romantic moments that may be small but definite😉

a box of macarons – King of Swords

Maybe because they’re a bit childish(?) or just optimistic, I kinda feel your Destined Person could be quite reckless in love, especially when they were a lot younger. They could’ve gotten hurt quite a bit in this regard, but don’t worry—that was part of their Higher Self wanting to teach them about healthy boundary. By the time you meet your Destined Person, there’s only so much left for them to heal and grow from. The way I see it, your Destined Person is quite a reasonable fellow, so they learn their spiritual lessons rather quickly.

One thing you need to know though, is that this person has cut ties and burnt bridges with a lot, A LOT, of toxic people from their past. A lot of people wanted access to them for their wealth or status. It could also be that they were in relationships whereby they were valued only for their beauty or sexual capacity and all such menial things. They’ve been taken advantage of quite a lot, sheesh. Meanwhile, with that pure Soul of theirs… Yeah, they carry deep wounds deep in their heart.

When they get to know you, they’re so happy, so glad to know there’s another person who’s just like them. That you’re unfazed by someone’s numbers in their bank accounts. That you’re able to see through the illusions of the Matrix. That you passionately care about what’s essential. Your Destined Person thinks you possess a moral compass that’s different from most everybody they’ve ever known. They appreciate you a lot for your intelligence and your courage to cut through the bullshit of society. I think you’re the type of person who speaks your mind? They LOVE that about you!

143ML OF PURE LOVE ESSENCE🔻💙

flower bouquet – Silver Astrologer (John Dee)

home sweet home – Priestess of Clarity

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Pile 3 – Possession, Obsession, Protection

VIBE: Poison by NCT DREAM

perfume – Ace of Wands Rx

Aight, this the freaky Pile. Get ready XD

Your Destined Person is a bit of a psychopath LMAO Just kidding. Not saying they’re a narc(!) or anything but they’re this lil freako who thinks outside of the norm. Your Destined Person is a true gem of an eccentric and they have many kinky fantasies about you. Dunno why that’s coming up strong XD But hey, you’ll recognise your Destined Person by how they’re truly the most unique individual you could ever know! A one in a billion kind of a brilliant person!

Your Destined Person is quite rebellious in that, whatever they do, they make sure they don’t follow the convention. They like to adventure in all the senses of that word. They like to experiment and test themselves also. What they truly want is to carve out a Life of their own, irrespective of what their family or community expects of them. Some of you, your Destined Person could even be this kind of rebellious inventor of sort who deliberately invents a new way of living in the modern world, that nobody else could think of.

A futuristic spiritual genius, I think. For that reason, some of you, your Destined Person might as well end up changing the world for the better! Someone like Elon Musk, I think? Your Destined Person could have strong influences of Aquarius that make them think outside of the box and then, in some aspects could be influenced by some strategic Scorpio placement that pushes them to see their psycho ideas see the light of day.

playdate – II The High Priestess

Having said all of that, in relation to you, the person they devote themselves to, ah yes, they’re still pretty much a psycho in that regard XD Lemme explain, ahem!

Your Destined Person is a sneaky psycho even in the way they think about their connection to you. They really have so many kinky fantasies about you, which they won’t always let out because even they understand how scary some of their thoughts are! They daydream about taboo behaviours in bed. Things most normies wouldn’t think about and when they do some of those things to you, you’d be in heaven, babe. They know, by intuition, how to make you… explode? What they do behind closed doors will drive you insane with new colours of pleasure you didn’t even know were possible.

This motherfucker is cruel dominant. They like to dominate all of you like they could swallow your entire being when you’re in their embrace. Your Destined Person is the type that expresses Love through sexual acts. For them, sex is not dirty, necessarily. Sex is healing and transformative. Sex is a sacred union between you two. They’re immaculately intense about it. They give their all—soul and body—and everything in between. They tend to like to be on top, and they could get frightening at times, but if whimpering under them happens to be a thing of yours, oh~ XD

More than appearances could tell, your Destined Person thinks about sex with you a lot. A LOT. A. LOT, babe. They just might not always make it known to you because even they get troubled by it sometimes LMAO They wish they could simply stop thinking about you naked but they’re down horrible. They don’t know what to do with themselves. They think a screw got loose somewhere in their brain. They blame it on you being… you.

They’re crazy passionate about you. They DO love you. Deeply and truly and heroically. They’re also just crazy. What are you gonna do with a lover like this? Hahah…

a box of macarons – 5 of Cups Rx

You know what kind of character your Destined Person reminds me of? Yasu from NANA. There’s an episode where Reira, a girl he used to date in high school, came running to his apartment, sobbing and looking for comfort, and Yasu didn’t give her what she was looking for. He knew full well doing so wouldn’t be the right thing to do, because he was in love with Nana. Nana was the only person he’d allow that kind of access to, if that makes sense. Yasu is the kind of person who knows the distinction between good manners that are real, and fake kindness or politeness that is lacking dignity. Your Destined Person has quite a noble character in spite of their eccentric insanity.

On top of their intense seriousness, your Destined Person is also someone who quickly burns bridges to the past and locks access to themselves. They’d never allow those who have betrayed or wronged them to have a piece of their success and happiness. They don’t entertain other people taking their kindness and gentleness for granted. Though they are caring, they’re not stupid; and they respect you a lot that they’d never allow their politeness to ruin their relationship with you. Your Destined Person is sensible enough not to perform polite gestures that might get misunderstood by those who want something from them. Ahem.

They are deeply loyal and will always be on your side. Till death do us part kind of partner. They want you to know security, have stability, and they’d hope you never doubt their intentions. I think, your Destined Person wants to let you know that when you’re with them you will never have to fear losing them and that they will never allow any situation or person to cast a shadow of doubt on your mind😊Aaaa o mai gaaa~

143ML OF PURE LOVE ESSENCE🔻❤️

flower bouquet – Gold Alchemist (Roger Bacon)

home sweet home – Priestess of Energy

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☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

[PAC Masterlist] [Part 2] [Part 3]

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[nishloves]

few months ago; kwon soonyoung (svt)

pairing : switch!reader x fratboy!switch!hoshi (svt)

words : 3.8k (approx.)

theme : oneshot, fluff, smut, mutual pining, fwb to lovers, smut with slight plot

warnings : smut (18+), cursing, oral, degradation, praise, a little bit of spanking, overstimulation, jealousy, soft-rough and passionate sex, appearance of jihoon!

unedited so please don't mind any weird sentence framing, I will definitely proofread it when I get some free time <3

request by @aaniag <3

@kflixnet

things between you and soonyoung were strictly inclusive, unofficial, secret, confidential— however you may say it. just a few months ago, you were just friends, sending each other random texts, partying, hanging out occasionally, hyping each other up for new dates; just a few months ago, you were unaware about his skills.

now, in your five years of knowing soonyoung, you knew just how great and genius of a dancer he was, just how strong his vocal prowess is and how- if he put in any effort— how well he could rap.

you remembered how happy he was when he introduced himself with his college stage name— hoshi. and you were so glad because finally he would be able to showcase his moves on larger grounds.

but you weren't talking about those skills, were you?

you sipped your drink as liquor burned down your throat, wincing you looked around the party only for your eyes to land at jihoon— one of the best friends of soonyoung. his permed black hairs traced his delicate face as he seemingly ignored the obscene music of the wild frat, drinking and indulging himself in his alcohol. you didn't and would never understand how a person like jihoon landed soonyoung as his friend.

and there, your thoughts drifted back to soonyoung again, just a few months ago, soonyoung had become a gym rat, just a few months ago you had haphazardly slurred, "you're so fucking hot soonie~" in his ears and just a few months ago, soonyoung had kissed you so ferociously that you were almost fooled into thinking that he wanted you for years.

just a few months ago, you and soonyoung abashedly woke up tangled in each other's arms, just a few months ago you both had embarrassingly admitted that it was the best sex of your life and just a few months ago hoshi put forward the notion of being friends with benefits, strongly emphasising the point of 'no strings attached.'

you adjusted the strap of your little black dress as you forcefully looked at jihoon and came to admiring his features again, how soft and pale his skin looked, how cold he seemed yet his words were always warm and how his biceps bulged out of his simple white shirt with its sleeve rolled up.

you remembered how you had scoffed at people who were "friends with benefits", mocking them for having commitment issues but never had you ever assumed that you would be stuck in the same pickle with a tag of "strictly friends with benefits" on your head.

oh how you despised soonyoung for making your heart mushy whenever he did something even remotely romantic and how you hated him for giving you best orgasms every. single. time.

you couldn't fall for soonyoung, you can't fall for soonyoung, you must not fall for soonyoung.

you reminded yourself as you looked at jihoon— he looked like someone who would want a committed relationship, who could make you feel secure with his words and not to mention he was terribly hot. you both had talked a few times and you wondered, well why not shoot the shot?

you should probably refrain from taking decisions under the influence.

you gathered your courage as you walked up to jihoon who warmly smiled at you as you sat opposite to him, starting a small talk. you vaguely remembered how jihoon laughed at one of your remarks, how you had sneakily held his hand, how his eyebrow quirked up with a smirk etching on his face. but instead of your talk with jihoon you remembered seeing soonyoung for the first time that day, his hair dyed to blonde as he rowdily danced on the centre table, soon his eyes met yours.

you reluctantly peered your gaze away from soonyoung to jihoon, who laughed at your innocent bambi eyes.

"are you trying to make soonyoung jealous, y/n?" jihoon had asked, inching closer to you.

"why would I try to make him jealous?" you muttered, tracing circles on jihoon's knuckles as you heard his deep chuckle.

"well— aren't you both very close?"

"did soonyoung say something?"

"not exactly."

"then we aren't," you muttered as you leaned towards jihoon, who gently grasped your shoulder as he whispered, "if you want a kiss, I will give it to you— it won't mean anything, but are you sure you aren't making any mistake?" jihoon asked, his eyebrows scrunching up in worry as he steadied you.

you eyes captured soonyoung's again as bile rose up in your throat, you felt happy that you were hitting on jihoon, who was sober than most and was probably wiser than you.

"sorry," you mumbled, "gonna kiss you."

"go ahead doll," jihoon replied as you captured his lips in yours, with the corner of your eye you could see soonyoung flinch. the kiss wasn't much— although you were sure that it was because of how hard your heart raced when you seemingly made an eye contact with soonyoung in middle of the kiss. though you must applaud jihoon for his skills.

"hmm, work done?" jihoon asked as he smirked at you while you hunched back in your seat.

you didn't see soonyoung getting up and walking towards you until he stood right next to you and said, "sorry jihoon-ah, need y/n's help for something."

jihoon waved him off as soonyoung grabbed you by your arm, nearly yanking you off to one of the rooms as he closed the door behind him.

you could see that he was seething under his calm demeanor, you could see that he was furious.

his mouth attached to your throat as you gasped feverishly, was soonyoung jealous?

"trying to get into jihoon's pants now, aren't you slut?" hoshi spat as he pushed you against the wall, one of his hands situated between your head and the wall as you remembered how once you had smacked yourself hard into the wall when you were messily making out with soonyoung, making you both flutter into laughter.

your heart felt warm because after that, soonyoung always took care to not push you as fervently into the wall.

"didn't get my attention for a few days and now you're turning into a whore? that too in front of me?" he raged as his lips trailed small kisses down your face, his hot breath fanning your cold skin. "that too my best friend! aren't you becoming gutsy baby?" he growled as he slammed his lips onto yours while you reciprocated the gesture. his tongue swirled around yours as he explored your mouth, his teeth bit your lip as you hissed in slight pain, making hoshi's other hand which had caged you slide up your dress.

"soonyoung~" stop, stop making me fall for you.

"so the little doll can speak now, can't she?" he whispered against your face as your thighs clenched together— maybe you will address the issue of your heart some other day.

soonyoung passionately kissed you again, his lips nipping on your lower lip as his hands were now buried in your hairs, angling your face to kiss you into frenzy, kissing you farther, deeper.

"you liked it when jihoon called you doll, didn't you? you want me to stop and call jihoon?"

"don't stop..." you mumbled as you broke in front of soonyoung, he was like a drug— insatiable, ethereal— you could never stop loving that face.

"you would have loved it if it was jihoon instead of me, wouldn't you?"

he whispered as he slid his hands underneath your dress, sliding your panties to the side as he pumped in his fingers without any warning, making you gasp as you chanted his name.

there was a slight anger and desperation in his voice as your knees buckled because of instant friction, you leaned onto soonyoung's shoulder as you gasped everytime his fingers performed wonders for you.

"no soonie- no one can fuck me like you."

"yeah, that's why you were flirting with jihoon like a whore."

he was angry, you could see it, you could feel it. as much as soonyoung was open for anything, he despised sharing— something you found odd for the label of no strings attached at all.

you were so near now, so full, and wanting so much more than soonyoung was offering you right now.

your hands trailed under his shirt as you felt his abs, making soonyoung chuckle.

"look at you, so drunk on me when I have just touched you— makes me think, would you touch jihoon like that?"

no. i wouldn't. i can't.

you had fucked other boys when you got yourself into this relationship with soonyoung— he knew that too, so why was he so stuck on jihoon?

soonyoung effortlessly unzipped the back of your dress making your breasts spill out as he latched his mouth on one of your breasts, swirling his tongue, nipping on your skin, sucking your nipple slowly while he efficiently fucked you with his fingers as you whimpered. you were close, so very close.

"soonyoung— i— I am close."

"go on, get off on my fingers, remind yourself just who can get you off in a span of a few minutes, just on whose fingers you depend on."

your cheeks burned with slight shame at his honest words as you chased your high, rolling your hips as much as you can as you came, moaning out his name, chest rippling with regret— you knew you were falling for him more with each passing second.

and it wasn't just because he was hot.

you should address the matters of your heart now, you know you won't be able to speak up again.

"soonyoung stop," you whimpered as you leaned onto his shoulders, your legs giving out because of the sudden and rushed orgasm and because soonyoung wasn't stopping.

"please stop— red."

and that made soonyoung snap back into reality, you never said 'please stop', you never had ever used the word 'red' either.

his anger quickly faded down as he gently held you, concern evident in his eyes as he cursed at himself, his world came crashing down on him. how could he not understand that you didn't want him to do that? how could he even potentially hurt you?

"what happened y/n? shit— are you okay? I'm so sorry— did I go too far?"

you shivered as you hugged soonyoung closer, tears welling in your eyes, you wanted to comfort him— tell him that you didn't mind his actions at all but you couldn't speak, your heart felt heavy, it almost drowned you in your own wallows. hell, you were heartbroken even before confessing.

"y/n, speak up baby—" he whispered in your ears as he gently set you down on the bed, scrambling towards the water bottle which laid in the room, after a while you realised it was soonyoung's room.

plushies of tigers were scattered across the bed, creating an odd feeling of warmth amongst neutrally painted bedroom. his room was surprisingly clean and nice— probably coz he was looking forward to fuck some girl.

he rushed to get you water as you gulped it down, looking up at soonyoung and his concern lidded eyes, you made up your mind.

"soonyoung, we can't do this."

"can't do what? did i hurt you y/n? was i too rough in my approach? did i make you feel—"

"you made me feel good soonyoung," you stopped his rambling.

sighing you looked down at your feet and then at your discarded dress— you were sure you would have laughed at your situation if you weren't the one experiencing it.

"then why—"

"you make me feel too good," you cut him off, sucking a deep breath you continued, "so good that I can't even look at other guys, I don't want to date anyone anymore; hell, I don't find anyone attractive. i went on a few dates—"

"you went on dates?" soonyoung questioned as his brows quirked up, a slight frown visible on his face as he sat on the floor in front of you, his hand caressing your bare thigh as he tried to comfort you. "sorry— please go on."

"i- i went on dates and could never like anyone, i thought it was because you had suddenly become so much more attractive to me but it's not even—"

"you find me attractive?"

"duh. soonyoung, I don't just find you attractive, I find you to be endearing, funny, cute— every single positive adjective. my heart burns when I look at you having fun with other girls, being all giddy when they flirt with you I found you beautiful before you became a gym rat and i—" you halted, his words of no strings attached running in your mind, "I'm sorry, I wasn't able to keep up my side of bargain, it's not no strings attached anymore, I want this to stop before I like you more."

a silence, great, now you have messed up.

"why do you want us to stop?" soonyoung asked as you noticed a newfound glimmer in his eyes, he got up from the floor to sit next to you, snaking his hands around your waist he pulled you closer, his hot breath fanning your face as he said, "why do you want us to stop when I like you a lot too?"

"what do you mean?" you asked, unable to process his words.

"dummy, i had a crush on you for years— that day, shit... that day when I woke up next to you, I panicked, I wanted to experience that again, i was selfish, I wanted you in any way I can and shit that sounds toxic, i—"

"soonyo—"

"hell, I'm sorry, sorry for being a coward, sorry for not opening up sooner."

you kissed him, maybe it was the liquor speaking, or maybe it was because of the state soonyoung had left you in before he confessed, you kissed him. your hands buried in his hair as you pulled him closer.

you were grateful that your feelings were reciprocated.

soonyoung moaned in the kiss as you swivelled your hips up and straddled soonyoung, making him fall on the bed.

soonyoung was being mean by not discarding a single article of his clothing and leaving you naked.

your hands effortlessly unbuttoned the silk cloth as it fell around from his torso, still worn but unbuttoned.

your lips trailed down his sternum as he whimpered slightly at your touch while you left fleeting kisses all over his chest. your teeth grazed his abs as you sucked on his skin, leaving your marks along the trail as you smoothly unbuckled his belt while soonyoung's shivered, panting, yearning for more.

you unzipped his jeans and pulled down his underwear as his cock sprang out of his clothes, you lazily looked up at soonyoung who writhed under your gaze, a pink hue dusting his cheeks as he murmured, "please..."

"please what soonie?"

"please touch me," he whimpered, too hard because of your prior actions.

you grinned as you stroked his dick, peppering kisses as you licked him slightly, making him shiver underneath you. you took him in your mouth, bobbing you head as your tongue swirled around his shaft while he moaned, oh so pretty.

"y/n— ah, just like that. oh lord."

you took him out of your mouth, your lips ghosting his slit as you swirled your tongue against his angry tip, making him close his eyes under pleasure.

a smile stretched on your face as soonyoung whimpered numerous of his whines, you took him in as far as you could, enjoying the way his hair stuck on his face due to sweat, he was a whimpering mess all underneath you. your teeth grazed his dick slightly as he shot forward, holding your hair firm in his grasp as you caressed his hand which held you.

"gonna cum— y/n—"

you finished him with a lick at his head and he busted, all in your mouth and you made sure to take it all.

"shit y/n— why are you so hot?" ho groaned, his hips stuttering under you as you got up.

"slow down baby~" you whispered in his ears as you bit his earlobe making him groan as he pushed you down on the bed. slowly inching his face towards your pussy he kissed your inner thighs, peppering small licks and kissed on your lips before his tongue entered your slit, making you hiss as your back arched, an illicit moan escaping you as his tongue expertly swirled around you, him sucking your skin and his hand rubbing the bundle of your nerves. he was so drunk with your pussy, so buried in pleasuring you, his tongue lapping with your juices, scavaging your insides, he knew you so well in span of just a few months, he knew how your body will react to any lick of his.

"soonie~ ha— lord~"

you could feel his lips stretch into a grin around your lips but he didn't stop, you moaned under him, chanting a string of his name, oh how you needed him so much, was he a drug?

he slowly inserted a finger in you as you gasped, you could feel a tight knot in your stomach, you could feel soonyoung's tongue inside you, his fat finger pumping inside you, his plush lips grazing your sensitive mound and sucking you. you nearly screamed your head off pleasure.

"soonyoung— stop— gonna cum, ah~"

he momentarily removed his lips from your pussy, a small grin breaking out on his face as he chuckled dryly, "cum on my face princess, wanna taste you so bad."

no one knew you better than soonyoung and no one could make you feel this much ever.

you cried out as you came, all over him as he smiled at you fondly. you loved it when he was soft, you loved it when he looked at you with love lidden eyes and you certainly loved it when he was rough with you.

your eyes glimmered with mischief as you whispered, loud enough for soonyoung to hear.

"sorry for kissing jihoon, soonie."

you could see his demeanor shift, you could see the way his pupils dilated as his brown soft eyes glimmered with a new found lust.

before you knew it you were grabbed by your hip and pulled up, a gasp escaping your lips as soonyoung's lips attached with your now sensitive pussy again, he licked you again and again, smothering kisses on the bundle of your nerves as his fingers pumped into you, you were so sensitive, so tired, your voice broken with how much soonyoung was giving to you.

"soonie— ah... too much, oh god."

you had forgotten how to form basic sentences, only a prayer of his name and a whine of him being too much escaped your lips as your eyes rolled back while you chased your high again.

you came embarrassingly fast as soonyoung pushed you down on the bed, turning you over and propping your ass up.

"ha— trying to take hoon's name and making me jealous, slut?"

he coldly said as his hand came in contact with one of your butt cheek, the slap reverberating around the room as you moaned, his hand almost instantly coming to caress your ass, you knew how soft he was with you, he wouldn't want to even accidentally hurt you ever.

"you loved it when he called you doll, didn't you?"

he whispered as he lined his dick against your pussy, teasing your slit as his dick brushed your lips, you were too far gone into the pleasure, you were too sensitive, you were almost sure you couldn't take it.

but soonyoung didn't give you a warning, his cock slid inside you swiftly as your back arched with the feeling of fullness.

a moan escaping your lips as his fat cock brushed your insides.

"should I say it now, hmm? doll?"

your pussy clenched around him as soonyoung groaned, his hand grabbing your ass and his other hand situating on your hip as he emptied out only to ram into you with full force.

"liked it when I called you doll, didn't you baby?"

"ah yes— soonie~ oh god."

"my pretty slut loves it when her boyfriend is fucking some sense into her, doesn't she?"

tears welled up in your eyes as you could feel his cock into your abdomen, you mind going hazy with the amount of force soonyoung put in with every bit of his thrust.

"yes! oh god yes!"

"my little slut loves it when i empty out my thick fat cock inside her, doesn't she? or does she want someone else's cock?"

"no soonie~" you whimpered, your mouth agape as you tried your best to answer him, "uhm- ah- oh only you, it's only you!"

"only me?"

"your soonie- only yours, yours, yours, yours!" you whimpered, your body too weak because of consistent orgasms, you started faltering when soonyoung's hand came around your waist as he helped you prop up, you now laid against his chest as his dick hit you in all the spots you couldn't even have imagined.

"your soonie~ oh god~ yours."

"hmm? is my baby feeling hazy?"

"soonie—" even you could understand you were too gone out of your mind as your fourth orgasm of the day approach you, you were too fucked out, you could almost see stars.

soonyoung's hand circled around your abdomen while he felt his dick so deep inside you, he groaned with the image now fully plastered in his mind as he whispered, "fucked you dumb baby, you want me to fuck you like this everyday? show you who you belong to?"

his lips bit numerous hickeys on your neck and collarbone as you tried to speak but you couldn't, your words now a mess of different incoherent letters as soonyoung chuckled at your state.

"you're doing good baby," he whispered in your ears as you tried your best to match your hips with his rhythm, but you were so tired.

"good job, princess~ now, let go baby, cum with me," he whispered so sweetly in your ears as you let go of all the pent up stress in your body, you even squirted while, coming together with him as you shivered, your body limp as you laid down right on soonyoung's bed. your body twitching with overstimulation as you could feel soonyoung pull you closer as he swept your hairs behind your ears and lightly kissed the side of your forehead.

"be mine?" he asked, his fierce eyes now as soft as a hamster's, you gave into his touch as you whispered, "always yours."

[cleoluvrr]

Call Me (Rafe Cameron x Reader) I

SYNOPSIS: call someone else if you want that.

WARNINGS: mature content; secret relationship, verbal abuse, jealousy, general violence, manipulative behavior, explicit language, substance abuse & addiction, obsession, depiction of explicit sexual acts

masterlist

rafe always had a meanness to him, one that you’d never been oblivious to, though never really on the receiving end of it at first. the two of you would have petty banter, little arguments that would eventually reveal the underlying tension between you, but it was nothing more than that.

with others, however, you’d seen him be cruel–beyond cruel. your middle sister, just a couple years your junior, was friends with kiara carrera and those other boys she hangs out with by association. you’d heard the stories of his behavior, and while it may make you a terrible person, you really didn’t care. his business with them wasn’t yours, and you weren’t close enough to rafe to confront him about it. she’s never said he’s done anything to her directly, so what could you really do about it? it’s not like she knew you two even talked in the first place, so it was out of your hands.

maybe it was because of his strained relationship with his father, or the lack of relationship with his mother. it could be just how he is naturally; you wouldn’t be surprised.

however, you began to become a victim of his malice yourself at some point last year. you two weren’t particularly nice to each other, but there was something different this time. it used to be playful, but this time it was purposeful; at least it was on his end.

sure, rafe isn’t the most rational person in the world, but the amount of anger and frustration he was taking out on the girl he was secretly fucking was completely out of proportion. 

you asked him more times than i can remember; begging him to tell you what was wrong. even when you should have been mad at him for treating you like some bitch off the street, you simply couldn’t ignore the feeling of something being wrong with him. maybe you caught feelings for him and that’s why you cared so much, even when you shouldn’t have.

it was around the time you sister started staying out later, riding around town with her friends and stirring up trouble like she had no home-training. you were positive rafe had something to do with it, but never said anything about it. it wasn’t like he was answering your calls at the time anyway.

eventually, you just stopped talking. maybe it was inevitable, a natural occurrence from lack of mutual communication.

so when you saw him just a few dozen yards away for the first time in months, you weren’t sure how to feel.

you watch as he takes each drink to the head, shot after shot from across the room. his blonde hair that would have once been blocking his vision was now cropped short and barely visible from where you stood. the people around him encouraged the behavior, cheering him on every time he slammed the bottom of a shot glass back on the table.

he looked deceptively sober, but his body language was all the evidence you needed to know he had more than a bump of the cocaine some girl brought to the party. his alcohol tolerance was way stronger than everyone around him, the sloppiness of his friends completely opposite of his nonchalant demeanor.

that was one of many differences between the two of you. he liked to drink, get high, and do things that were far past the limits of legality that only someone with money and influence like him could get away with. you hated the feeling of losing control, of not being completely aware of what was happening around you, and would even never think of doing a fraction of the things he does.

yet, for some reason that you could never figure out, he piqued your interest. 

maybe it was because he was “bad,” and you were “good.” maybe it was his roughness that attracted you, or the way he did whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted. rafe’s instability contrasted everything about you; it gave you a rush that you’ve never felt with anyone else.

“what are you looking at?”

you’re pulled out of the one-sided staring contest, the sound of your friend’s voice capturing your attention over the loud music. 

“what?” you said. you leaned down towards the shorter blond, ear in better reach of her voice.

“what are you looking at?” she repeats louder this time. her breath smells of alcohol, the pink whitney sitting in the bottom of her cup the clear cause of her slight swaying.

your eyes flicker back to the boy across the room for a moment, the sight of him leaning down to snort a white substance from the table beneath him making you cringe to yourself. your friend’s eyes follow yours, the green irises further revealed by the widening of her eyes.

“rafe cameron?” she says quite loudly, her voice carrying around the area as other people nearby turn to look at her in annoyance. “why the hell are you staring at rafe cameron?”

“say it louder, why don’t you? i don’t think russia could hear you.” your eyes tear away from him and return them to your scantily clad friend. “jesus christ, misty. you are so drunk.”

“you should try it some time.” she giggles, arm raising her cup in a cheer. you rolled your eyes at her and raised your own drink to your lips, the taste of cool water refreshing on your tongue. 

your experience with alcohol is slim by choice. the idea of not being in total control of yourself makes you more than uncomfortable, and the taste of the beverage did not appeal to you. you knew how to have a good time without the aid of alcohol or drugs.

“i’ll pass…” you say with a breathy chuckle. you pulled out your phone to check the time, the dark of the night beginning to drag on into the earliest hours of the morning. you were sure if you stayed out any longer your parents would send a search group.

the party hadn’t been much fun to me anyways, the celebration of your friend’s recent graduation not doing much to keep me entertained.

your gaze returns to the spot where rafe stood only to be met with nothing, the boy nowhere to be found in your brief sweep of the area. you look around the party from where you stood, head swiveling to find the blonde amongst the gaggle of kooks in the room. he has seemingly vanished into thin air despite being the most noticeable person in the place.

“hey, um…” you trailed off, head turning back to face a drunk misty. “i need to get home. are you ready to go?”

the girl shakes her head, finger pointing behind her to the familiar figure of her boyfriend. he was watching her closely, clearly on edge as his inebriated girlfriend consumed enough liquor to take down a grown man.

“jordan is taking me home with him.” she giggles again, eyebrows wiggling suggestively. you were sure he’d have her tucked into bed within the next two hours, whatever she thought was gonna happen would not be happening if he had anything to say about it.

“okay, girl. i’ll see you soon.” you pulled her into an embrace, the top of her head reaching the bottom of your chin as you lean down to hug her. you weren't sure how she wasn’t falling over yet–there wasn't much body for the alcohol she had befriended for the night to go through. “and lay off the liquor.” your voice was stern as you pulled away.

she throws the rest of the liquid down her throat in response, the bottom of the red solo cup left empty as crushed it beneath her fingers. you couldn’t help but to smile at her before turning away, her boyfriend now fast approaching before she got a chance to find the liquor table again.

stepping out of the party, you pull your phone from the pocket of your skirt to order a car home. it had completely slipped your mind that you rode here with misty and her boyfriend, instantly reminded of the fact that you didn’t own a car nor a license as you approached the front yard. the prices for cars at this time a night were more than you got paid per hour.

your head fell back in frustration, the warm summer breeze blowing against your bare legs as you ground out into the night sky. 

“y/n?”

the sound of your name sends a shiver down your back. you stopped dead in your tracks, as if the cool metal of a gun was being held to the back of your skull. 

your head turns in the direction of the familiar voice, eyes tearing away from the distant constellations in the night sky. lafe’s leaning against the side of his truck, a mixture of keys dangling around his finger.

“rafe.” you respond to him with his own name. “long time, no see.”

your feet carried you towards the blonde resting against the dark colored vehicle behind, eyes locked on the blue of his own. 

you could feel the sharpness of your teeth tearing into your bottom lip, the warm, bubbly feeling you got whenever the two of you were in the same room making a return. rafe’s eyes fell to the way you were ravaging the plump flesh, almost entranced by the sight. 

“how’ve you been?” the taller man pulls his gaze away and returns it to your eyes as he inquires. “heard you graduated, congrats by the way.”

“yeah, thanks.” you reply chipperly. “um…i’ve been alright. not a lot going on, to be honest. you?”

“same, same… he trails off awkwardly, the sounds of the late night filling the air between us. “hey, um, do you–do you need a ride, or anything?”

you shook your head immediately and raised your hand to show him the rideshare app on the screen.

“no, i’m good. i don’t wanna take you out of your way.” you smile politely at him as you speak. “thanks, though.”

rafe shakes his head and opens the passenger’s side door he was previously leaning on just seconds before. 

“it’s no big deal, seriously. you don’t live that far from me, i’m heading in that direction anyway.”

you stare at him wordlessly for a moment, eyes tearing away from him and flickering around the street around you. no one had exited the party after you did, at least not that you had seen. the ground was shaking beneath the two of you as the bass of the music continued strongly through the night.

you hesitantly take a step towards the car door being held open by the tall blonde, not quite sure if it’s smart for you to be around him right now. you lift yourself into the tall truck and plop down into the seat before your eyes set on rafe once again. 

the fist-stized muscle protected by your ribs feels as if it’s trying to tear your chest in half to escape just from the sight of rafe, unsure of how to behave around him anymore. 

shutting the door after seeing you settled inside, he makes his way over to the driver’s side. watching as he buckles himself in and starts the car, the roaring of the engine sent a vibration through the entirety of your being. 

“do you think you should be driving right now?” you spoke up after a minute of silence. his head turns fully to meet your eyes, his pupils large and eyes dark under the minimal lighting of the moon above.

his eyebrows raise at the inquiry before just barely furrowing them in confusion.

“you think i can’t handle my liquor?” he blinks at you in the darkness of the car, eyelids hiding and revealing the blown out pupils that had taken over the ocean blue of his irises. “you never had a problem with it before.”

your mouth opened briefly before snapping back shut, the words that left his own rendering you responseless. 

you and rafe had a long history together, though, if you were to ask anyone else that, they’d be taken by surprise. there had been plenty of times where you’ve let him drive around while he was far from sober, but it had been months since then. it had been months since you two had spoken, and it wasn’t really something you felt comfortable with anymore.

“okay, well it’s been a while and you’ve had a lot to drink tonight.” you eventually found your voice again, pointing out how long it’s been since you’d been in a situation like this one. 

rafe didn’t argue, instead choosing to shrug his shoulders wordlessly. he put the car into reverse and backed out of the driveway smoothly, the truck pulling off into the dimly lit street.

you sat in silence for the entire ride, the awkwardness in the air more on your end than his. the trees blew by on the side of the road, the leaves appearing to be nothing but dark blurs as you observed them from the window. rafe was not sparse with the gas, each sharp, fast turn leaving you more anxious than the last.

you could feel rafe glance towards me every so often, steely eyes burning into the side of your face and leaving behind a warmth in your cheeks that couldn’t be shaken.

it was when he pulled in front of your dark house that he finally broke the silence, leaving a question that you weren’t quite sure how to answer hovering in the cool air of the truck.

“hey, y/n?” 

“yeah?” you didn’t turn to face him, choosing instead to watch the windows of your house for any signs of life.

he sat wordlessly for a few seconds and you could feel his eyes on you once again, much more intensely than the first few times on the road. you were afraid to look back at him, fully aware that you would become lost in them like you did when you first met him.

“why’d you stop calling?” he asked. 

you blinked at the reflection in the window, his question echoing in your head. turning to face him, his eyes locked onto yours. they refused to let go, gaze leaving you trapped under the spell that it casts upon you. 

gulping soundlessly, you wet your mouth with the saliva collecting underneath your tongue as you prepared an answer. it felt as if the words had been stolen from your throat the moment you exchanged looks. 

“why’d you stop answering?” you said after finding your voice.

the feelings repressed began to bubble to the surface the longer you two sat in the enclosed space. you felt breathless, confused, and angry. not only at him, but at yourself as well. 

you let yourself become attached when you shouldn’t have, and because of that you had to suffer repercussions of unrequited feelings. you were angry because he left you hanging for weeks, but you let him. he treated you like shit, but you let him. you were never supposed to catch feelings, but you let yourself. 

that’s why you’re angry.

even with all of that, your heart never failed to beat out of your chest when he was near you. rafe didn’t even need to put his hands on you to leave you breathless. you should hate him, especially with how he treated you, treated your sister and her friends–but you don’t. you can’t.

that’s why you’re confused.

“i was dealing with a lot. i’m sorry.”

“that’s not really an excuse, rafe.” your lips pursed at him before rubbing together, the clear lip gloss coating them acting as a lubricant to prevent friction between them. “you didn’t want to tell me what was wrong when i asked, so you don’t get to use that card.”

rafe puts the car into park before fully turning to you, the furrow of his brow intensifying as he squints. shaking his head slightly, he opens his mouth to speak.

“it didn’t have anything to do with you, though.” he said. “i didn’t wanna drag you into my shit because it was…it was a lot. it was a lot and you didn’t need to be involved.”

“okay, and that’s fine.” your eyes flickered over at the dashboard’s clock to check the time, the number rising with each minute into the night. you turned back to him. “what’s not fine is blowing me off for months and then asking me why i stopped calling. you didn’t care to answer the phone when i did.”

rafes hand rakes over his buzzed head, fingers running through the stubble that replaces the golden locks that once held its place. he pulls his lip in between his pearly white teeth as he nods at you, tongue peeking through as they part to make space for the pink muscle. 

“you’re right.” he doesn’t argue like he usually would, the sudden accountability taking you by surprise. “that was kinda fucked up, wasn’t it? you didn’t deserve that.”

“no, rafe. i didn’t.”

he nods his head again and leans back against the cool, tinted window. his lids are low as he looks across at you, the intensity of his gaze causing your heart to leave bruises on your ribs from how strongly it pounded. you could barely hear anything, blood rushing past your ears and every breath shakier than the last.

stepping out of the car, rafe makes his way over to the passenger side door. you watch curiously as he crosses the front of the car, the street lights shining down on his broad frame. you don’t move when he opens the door, nor when he looks between you and your seatbelt expectantly.

your brows raise at the man briefly before the ‘click’ of the seatbelt fills both your ears, hands removing the snug strap from across your chest. you take the hand that he offers to exit the car, glancing up at your house again before taking it. nobody seemed to be awake but you still didn’t want to risk anyone seeing us this close together.

“nobody’s gonna see, y/n . calm down.” rafe’s voice so close to your ear pulls your attention away from the property and back towards him standing before you. 

you stepped down from the truck with his aide, but he didn’t move even once your feet touch the ground. instead, his hands moved to grasp your waist and pull you closer. the move felt so familiar yet so strange, but you accepted it rather than pushing him away. 

the warmth of his palms against your bare skin was intensified by the jolts of electricity felt whenever we touched. you could tell he felt the way you shivered in response to his fingers just barely gripping the soft flesh beneath them, thumbs smoothing over in a back and forth motion.

“i’m sorry i ghosted you. i was an asshole for that, and you know what? i deserve whatever you feel towards me.” you say nothing, but don’t push him away either. he takes that as a sign to continue. “but i hope you find it in you to forgive me, because i–i miss you.”

you nearly snorted as he uttered the sentence.

“you miss me?” you repeated the words back to him. “you sure know how to show it.”

“yes, i miss you.” rafe’s hold intensifies for a moment before going back to its previous state. “when i saw you at the party tonight, i–i didn’t know how much i missed your face. i missed your smile, your smell. i missed having you close to me and being able to hold you like this…”

the sound of him inhaling strongly shook you, his eyes screwing shut as he took in the combination of your natural scent and the gourmand perfume you wore. his fingers twitched against your skin as he resisted the urge to dig them deep into the flesh like he always used to. his chest rose and fell intensely, all but able to see his blood pumping through his jugular. 

“god, i fucking miss you.”

“rafe…” you called his name softly but sternly to pull him out of his hypnotized state. his eyes open but they’re barely focused. you weren’t sure if his pupils were blown because of the high, or because of you. “i miss you, too.”

the stillness between us remains until you broke it, the voice in the back of your head reminding you of the months spent trying to get over him.

“i miss you, but i can’t do this again.” you sighed heavily. “you fucked me up for months, rafe, and i can’t let that happen again.”

“it won’t happen again. i promise.”

sou shook your head at his words, tongue poking out just enough to taste the vanilla flavor of the gloss coating your lips. 

“no–no, rafe. no promises.” you let your hands fall to rest on top of his, watching as the sudden contact makes him shiver just as much as it used to when he did it to you. “no feelings–i can’t do that again.”

you pushed him away gently and stepped to the side, unsure of if you’d regret the words about to leave your lips next.

“if you wanna fuck, then we can do that.” your bluntness catches him off guard, head jerking back at the directness of the words. you’d never spoken like that before, and it shocked you as well. “but the lovey-dovey shit that we used to do? no more of that.”

“what?” rafe looks at you in disbelief, the vulgar language leaving him stunned. it was a rarity that you cursed–at least around him–, let alone said something so…intense. “what is that supposed to mean? ‘no more lovey-dovey shit?’”

you shrugged and pushed past him fully, feet carrying your body a few yards away before turning back to speak. he looked thoroughly confused and a bit hurt, but not as hurt as he left you when he ghosted you with a million unanswered questions and just as many ignored phone calls.

“it means if you call me in the night-time, i might pick up.” your eyes scanned for his reaction to the words left echoing in your own head for a moment, the heat of his gaze reminding you of the reason you needed to escape into the house behind you to begin with. “just depends on what you’re on.”

rafe was left standing in the dark of the early morning, bewildered and alone.