#a fight well fought remus lupin x reader

[to-fly-with-clipped-wings]

A Fight Well Fought 

Pairing: Remus Lupin x Reader

Summary: when Hogwarts is being faced by a surge of bullies, Remus Lupin finds himself at the brunt of it. As a prefect, and a victim, he has to bring in extreme measures to get this surge under control.

And you, the knight in shining armour and self-proclaimed bully buster, are the extreme measures.

Inspired by the bully x student council member trope. I read some really great ffs with like the student council x delinquent trope and I feel so bad because I can't remember their titles for the life of me TT but my heart goes out to the authors of those books <3

Reader's house and gender is ambiguous!

—---------------------------------

“You-Know-Who is an incel.”

You sweatdropped almost immediately after you said it. Perhaps that wasn’t the best thing to say to Bellatrix Black and her gang of future death eaters, but on the other hand, you didn’t really care. Someone needed to put that daft cow in her place, and boy, had you been lined up for a long time.

The mass of curly hair that was once hovering over a sobbing first year snapped in your direction. Bellatrix’s right eye twitched as she made her way toward you, stopping inches away from your face.

“What did you just say?” she wasted no time in brandishing her wand at your throat. A shadow was cast on her face. “How dare you. You foul little no-life! How dare you speak of the Dark Lord in that manner!” You narrowed your eyes at the tip of her wand before spitting out your reply. “You heard me. He’s an incel. A loser. A joke!”

You expected her to curse you on the spot, but instead she let out a high-pitched laugh as she bent down closer to you, her breath hot on your ear. “Oh, how amusing. You really think you know anything about the Dark Lord? You really think you can - ?”

You don’t give her the chance to finish her prolonged monologue. You leaned back, curling your fingers into fists, and whirled forward, causing your knuckles to make full contact with her face.

The punch sent Bellatrix flying backwards. Her head slammed into the wall of the corridor with a loud strike, accompanied by the gasps of the portraits surrounding you. You glared at her with a deep scowl, watching as blood slowly began to seep out of her nose. You flexed your fingers, ignoring the stinging sensation that was blistering out from your hand.

Adrenaline coursed through your body. You basically thrived from it, your love for fights and conflict often resulted in an overdose of the hormone. You grinned a malevolent smile, wiping the back of your blood-stained hand over your lips; you were pretty sure you now had a streak of red painted across your face.

Rodolphus Lestrange, Bellatrix’s husband-to-be, rushed to her side, blubbering panicked words of comfort to her. You had no idea where the other members had run off to.

Listening to their quiet whimpers (well, Rodolphus’s whimpers, Bellatrix was still quite motionless), your expression falls flat into a look of deep annoyance. “It’s funny how just one punch can take you down so easily.”

Now, it was you who took out your wand. You pointed it at the couple, with a derisive taunt. “Let’s see how your precious master reacts to this. Stupef- ! ”

You were cut off by a rush of frantic footsteps headed in your direction. “A-ah! (Y/n) (L/n), right?”

You turn your head to face the new voice, still keeping your wand poised at the centre of Bellatrix’s forehead. 

Oh. Remus Lupin.

You appraised him with furrowed brows. Remus Lupin was a member of the notorious boy-band squad “the Marauders”, but from what you had gathered, he was the most tame of the group. Your eyes dropped to the shiny red prefect badge on his chest. Yep. A goody-two-shoes indeed. 

Remus skidded to a halt several steps next to your posse of four, if that’s what you would call this exchange. He was completely out of breath, steadying himself by placing his hands on his knees as he hunched over. 

Now, just what did Remus Lupin want? He was in your year-level, and in quite a few of your classes, yet you couldn’t say you were well-acquainted with him - or any of his friends, for that matter. 

Remus, rather unimpressively in your opinion, sucked in a final breath of air before standing up straight. He ran his hand through his brown head of hair and made his way next to you. 

“Black and Lestrange,” he started, his voice now enforced with authority, a stark contrast from the huffing boy you had witnessed literally seconds prior. “Harassing younger year level students, let alone any students at all, is a clear violation of the student code of conduct at Hogwarts! For that, I will be speaking with your Head of House to ensure you receive the proper punishment.” 

Wow, you thought. That sounded really scripted.

Remus paused, and added as an afterthought, “20 points from Slytherin, each.”

Rodolphus, the only one conscious between the two, twisted his ugly mug into a snarl, evidently severely displeased with Remus. “You filthy half-breed! Do we need to remind you of your place, again?” 

You internally raised an eyebrow at this. Had the Remus Lupin gotten into a fight with the ‘slytherin gang’, as the school lovely christened the huddle of death-eaters-to-be.

Rodolphus suddenly stretched his arm out, presumably to drag the other boy close to attack him. His fingers circled around Remus’s collar, ready to seize and-

Rodolphus’s head was slammed back into the wall, narrowly dodging the bombarda curse you’d just fired. He blinked rapidly, as if just remembering your presence. Your lips twitched as you saw the tremors in the hand that was holding onto the front of Bellatrix’s robes. Someone needed to put the fear of Merlin in him. Asshole. 

You sneered at him. “You and your girlfriend better get out of my sight, because I assure you that the next time I see you, I won’t miss.”

With that, Rodolphus grabbed Bellatrix and scrambled away.

You stuffed your hands in your pockets, watching the pair run away with a sense of amusement. As the supposed leaders of ‘the Slytherin gang’, you would’ve thought they’d put up more of a fight. Maybe they weren’t on the tops of their games today, you’d heard complaints that they usually do much worse. Well, whatever. It’d do you good to keep your guard up for the next few days anyways, in case they decided to jump you in the middle of the night.

The first year student, who you’d totally forgotten about during the tussle, suddenly stood up, tear stains trailing down his cheeks. He didn’t stop to acknowledge you or Remus in his haste to get the hell out of your corridor.  You rolled your eyes and sighed. Kids.  Realising that it was just you and Remus left now, you began to follow the first year boy’s cue to leave, still scowling and fiddling with the wand in your robe pockets. 

“(L/n)!” said Remus, snapping his head away from the notebook he held in his hands - when the hell did he get a notebook - and toward you. 

“You’re (Y/n) (L/n), aren’t you?” he asked, repeating his previous question.

You eyed him from your spot near the end of the hallway. “...why do you care?”

He gave you a soft smile. “I’m Remus Lupin. We’re in the same year level. I don’t think we’ve met before.” You stayed silent, blinking lazily at his tall figure.

He gave a nervous laugh. “Anyways,” he said, scratching his cheek. “I just wanted to say thanks for helping out. Bullying has gotten completely out of hand and even though we’ve been trying to catch people, it's been really difficult to get everyone. So, I just wanted to say thanks! It’s really nice of you to step in for that first year boy.”

He has a lot of scars, you noticed, staring at his face. Gazing at him, you realised that he was still staring at you expectantly. “I wasn’t doing it for him, or for you. Black and Lestrange annoy me. I wasn’t trying to help out anyone,” you answered shortly.

“Well, regardless, thank you!” he gave you a cheesy thumbs up, causing you to roll your eyes.

An abrupt thought crossed your mind. 

Remus had to have been there the whole time, right? 

The corridor you’d been in was one of the most secluded in the school. From what you knew, prefects were given small sections to patrol each night plus the fact that the confrontation between the Slytherins and the first year boy had been going on for quite a while before you stepped in. There was no way that such a loud fight (especially when one of the three was screaming at the top of her lungs) would go unnoticed by him. Hell, if you were able to hear it from the next corridor over, then there was almost no evidence that Remus wouldn’t have known about it before.

You let your gaze settle on Remus. Just what has you so scared that you can’t step in first? The question sat at the tip of your tongue. The most plausible reason was that he was afraid of being harassed by those Slytherins (not to mention that sketchy line Lestrange had shouted before. ‘Again’? Did they usually gang up to teach Remus a lesson?)

Huh. Maybe that’s why he has so many scars.

Regardless, your eyes swept Remus up and down once more before you spun around and stalked out of the corridor. It doesn’t concern me anyways.

—---------------------------------

The next time you bump into Remus, you realise that your theory-conspiracy skills were surprisingly on point.

A midnight stroll, stemming from you raiding the kitchens, had led you to a dark, dingy little room in the corner of the dungeons as well as a front row seat to what looked like a Slytherin, pure-blood ritual with Remus Lupin as the sacrifice.

One, two, you started to count in your head, three, four. 

You could make out Wilkes (from his foul stench) and Avery’s scrawny physique in the weird circle they’d formed but you had no clue who the other two were.

Wilkes had been muttering something into Remus’s ear, his hand firmly gripping the ends of his chocolate coloured hair. Remus looked quite dazed, and you realised with a start that his left eye was darkened and deeply bruised. 

Wilkes sneered and he suddenly reared back, only to bash Remus’s head into the floor. What followed was one of the loudest cracks you had ever heard, as well as the ugly cackles of the four Slytherin lackeys.

Forcing his head up, Remus raised his gaze to the roof, revealing the wound on his forehead that was beginning to drip with blood.

What happened next was quite unclear to you. 

One moment you were glaring down the group with your hand coiling around the base of your wand, and then, the next were occupied by the groaning sounds and creaking limbs of four students who’d been ungracefully tossed into a heap. 

You stood next to Wilkes, staring intensely at before raising your foot and ramming it into his face. Good Merlin, did you hope that the heel of your shoe had dug into one of his eyes. He let out a howl and he brought his hands to his face to assess the damage. But before his hands could contact his skin, your foot harshly slammed down onto his fingers once again. 

Irritation was flooding through your veins, pounding like an alarm, as you glowered down at him and his lackeys. You held out your wand, your dominant hand busted from the force of your punches, as you intended to use reducto on them (or at the very least turn him into a chicken) when a hasty thud caught your attention.

Remus had fallen over trying to stand up, his mind clearly still blurry from when the Slytherin brutes had struck his head into the ground. You watched silently as he staggered over to you, placing his hand on your shoulder in an attempt to both placate you as well as regain his balance. 

He offered you one of his small smiles. “We have to stop meeting like this.”

Your eyebrow twitched as you raked your eyes up and down his lanky figure. Aside from the wounds on his face and the slight tears on his robes, he seemed to be relatively functioning. 

You turned your gaze away from him and toward the Slytherins convulsing on the floor. “How long have they been giving you shit like this for?” From the corner of your periphery, you saw his smile falter. He didn’t answer your question, and from that you could presume that it had been going on for quite a while. 

Taking in his sullen expression, a fresh wave of anger coursed through you as you bent down to grab the hair of one of the Slytherins moping on the ground. With a satisfying ‘thwack!’, you threw a punch that left a lovely, blooming purple bruise just underneath their eye. 

Before you could crack his skull into the floor, similar to the way they had done to Remus, the said boy spoke up. “(Y/n).”

His eyes pleading with you to stop, for some Merlin-forsaken reason. Though you wanted to say that you were an independent person who took no crap from anyone, it was enough for you to drop the Slytherin’s head and stand back up.

You glanced at Remus, your eyes dropping to his busted lip. Huh. When did that happen? 

“You said there was a bullying problem,” you spoke suddenly, diverting your gaze. You scuffed the floor with your foot, where a dark red liquid was stained across the ground. 

Remus blinked, surprised that you were initiating the conversation. “Yeah. Heh. Maybe I should’ve mentioned that I knew that from first-hand experience…”

You pocketed your wand and raised your eyes to meet his. The tips of your ears burned slightly. “I’ll help. I’ll take care of it.”

And for the second time, in the span of a few days, you stalked out of the room, plotting murder in your mind and leaving Remus to his own devices.

—---------------------------------

The next time Remus bumped into you, there was at least a dozen thoughts running through his head - the loudest one of all being “what the fuck.”

There were, if he had to estimate, about twelve students dangling above you, strung up like some gruesome chain of fairy lights. It didn’t help that their eyes were shiny with tears, reminiscent of little flickering bulbs. 

You were sitting under your halo of bruised and bloodied students, apathetically scanning your nails. You only looked up when you heard him approaching.

“Lupin,” you acknowledged dryly, looking vaguely unperturbed about having beat up members of the Hogwart delinquent squad that were at least double your size.

“(Y/n),” he meekly responded, dipping his head in greeting. His eyes were fixed on the students dangling above you, swaying whenever a soft zephyr passed by. The handiwork of levicorpus, he supposed.

You frowned at the concern etched on his face. How could he still have sympathy for punks like these, when he knew first-hand the damage they'd done to the students of Hogwarts. “I took care of it.”

Noticing how he was now staring into the widened eyes of Rosier, who was hanging pleasantly upside down, you helpfully added “I know it's not all of them, but I’m working on it.”

Remus’s shoulders shook slightly as he attempted to muffle his laugh. 

“Oh,” you said, “I almost forgot.” 

You waved your wand and about 4 of the students were sent crashing down. They groaned, clutching their heads. The sudden transition from hanging upside down into foetal position must have been unsettling, but you held little sympathy for their plights.

You nudged one of them in the back (more like kicked) and they all scrambled into a bow at Remus’s feet. 

“Lupin!” it was the four Slytherins who had jumped him the other day. They spoke in almost precise synchronisation, like they’d been forced to rehearse it several times over. “We’re sorry for attacking you! We promise to never do it again! Never!”

Remus, charmingly surprised at their sudden revelation, looked over at you. You were frowning again, and you shot off a spell at Wilkes, who let out a whimper. “Lupin!” he cried out. “I’m worse than worse! A monster among men! Please accept my sincerest apologi- !“

His apology speech ended shortly as he paused to hack out blood. You death-stared him, plotting only Merlin knows what, to force him to continue his apology to Remus.

Sweat-dropping, Remus bent down and placed a hand on his shoulder. On any other day, Wilkes would have spat in his face and called him a disgusting half-breed for touching him; but this was not like any other day. Wilkes’s teary eyes met Remus’s own as he mouthed out ‘help me.’

“W-well,” Remus flashed Wilkes one of his gentle smiles - you fought the urge to ram the Slytherin bully’s skull into the portrait of Sir Ewarn the Fifth (who had been watching the scene with a vague horror in his painted eyes). “I accept all of your apologies. Just, preferably, don’t do it again. Please?”

He stood up. Some of the people you had strung up weren’t even the traditional, pureblood supremacist Slytherins, he realised. Jeez. This bullying problem had spread to all the houses. His lips twitched when he caught you scowling at Zacharias Smith (senior), a fourth year Hufflepuff notorious for stealing people’s homework assignments and hiding them in the abandoned girls’ lavatory.

You watched as the Slytherins you had released began to scramble away, and with a sigh, you let down the remaining students. Before they sprinted away, though, you stared intensely at them, reminding them to promise Remus never to torment anyone again.

Once they were all gone, you turned to Remus with an almost cheery demeanour - or at least the cheeriest he’d seen on your face so far. “I don’t think you’ll be hearing any complaints about them anytime soon!”

Remus, bless his pure soul, cracked a weak grin at you. His golden eyes furrowed as he took your hands in his. “Everytime I see you, your knuckles are always split open. Do you not get them treated?” Your somewhat happy expression had returned to its typical deadpan. “I used to go to the Hospital Wing, but after a while Madam Pomfrey got wary of how many times I would show up. Eventually, I just stopped showing up altogether.”

Wow, thought Remus, absentmindedly glancing down at your hands. (Y/n) is just a fighting spirit through and through, huh? Of course, he had his own reasons for his perpetual presence in the Hospital Wing, but that was a story for another time.

He grabbed your hand and began tugging you softly to follow along with him. 

You weren’t entirely sure if he was aware of the extensive hand holding he was doing, and it made your ears burn with embarrassment. The two of you stopped in front of a broom closet, where he leaned in to grab a roll of bandages. 

“Sorry,” he said, the corner of his eyes crinkling as he gazed upon you gingerly. “I’m not really that great with healing spells and I don’t want to use you as my guinea pig just yet.”

Merlin, you thought angrily. He needs to stop smiling like that.

Remus kneeled down in front of you. He began unravelling the roll to wrap the bandages around your knuckles in a firm, yet delicate??, way. A way, you thought, glancing off to the side as you felt your face heating up, that felt oddly specific to Remus. 

When you felt his warm touch leave yours, you glanced back down, your face starting to cool down. You flexed your fingers experimentally, pleased to see that you could still curl them into fists easily enough.

“Hey, Remus,” you said, surprising both yourself and him with the use of his first name. 

You bent down to peer closely at his face.

He made eye contact with you, and you could hear his breath hitching as he realised the distance, or lack thereof, that was between the both of you. You reached your hand out, cupping his jaw and brushing your thumb against his cheek. You could feel his face heating up at your touch.

Just as Remus’s emerald eyes began to flutter shut, you pulled back abruptly. Your ears were warm as you too took notice how close the two of you were. You quickly showed him your thumb, where a single strand of brown lay.

“Eyelash.”

—---------------------------------

“Oi! (L/n)! Sit with us!”

You spun around to face the voice who had called out for you. You were greeted by the grinning face of James Potter (who was standing way too disturbingly close to you). 

“(L/n),” he repeated. “You’re friends with Moony, yeah? You should sit with us.”

He grabbed your wrist and dragged you over to the spot at the table where the infamous Marauders had claimed for today. You opened your mouth to protest (you and Remus weren’t really friends, more like partners in crime or something along those lines), but you decided to leave it. 

You took a seat next to your (favourite) marauder, who gave you one of his insufferable, pure, tender smiles. You forced your lips into a straight line, praying to whatever higher power watching over you that no one could feel the heat radiating from your face. 

You glanced around hoping that by the time you have to look back at Remus, your face would have cooled down. Lily Evans, Marlene Mckinnon, Mary Macdonald and Alice Fortescue were seated on your other side, deeply engrossed in whatever conversation they were having. Lily Evans was sitting unusually close to the Marauders today, especially considering how much she allegedly hated them (or did, at least, before her falling out with Snape which kind of neutralised her hate for them. Slightly).

Lily caught you staring and offered you a smile and a giggle, You froze awkwardly and blinked at her greeting.

“So, (L/n),” began Sirius Black, the resident Hogwarts heartthrob. He was grinning cheekily at you. “How are you on this mighty fine day?” You deadpanned at his wack attempt at a Texan accent. “Good.” “Ah, good, good.” he sweatdropped at your lack-luster answer. “Yep. It’s great to be good.” 

You raised an eyebrow at him before glancing at Remus, who smiled sheepishly at you.

“I- we noticed how you usually sit alone during mealtimes,” he said, shoulder brushing ever so closely to yours. “I thought it would be nice if you could join us.” 

Merlin, you could feel your ears burning again.

Remus continued on, seemingly taking no notice of your internal (and external) struggles. “We’re friends now, so you’re more than welcome to sit with us if you want.” 

He finished with one of his dazzling smiles and - jeez, you had to stop getting flustered over his smallest gestures.

“I’m James Potter, in case ya didn’t know before!” James Potter announced helpfully.

“Right, and I’m Sirius Black,” he said, grinning at you. “It's siriusly great to meet’cha!”

James and Remus chuckled at the joke. You blinked awkwardly at them before swivelling your head to look at the final boy. 

“I-I’m Peter Pettigrew,” he said, smiling nervously (though his smile wasn’t nearly as cute as Rem- wait, what on earth were you thinking?!)

They all looked at you expectantly. 

“Oh.” you began ever so eloquently. “I know who all of you are. We’re in the same year level. We take most of the same classes as each other?” Seeing them stare blankly at you, you sighed. 

“Well, whatever,” said Sirius, leaning forward, a shit-eating grin on his face. “We heard, from our dear pal Moony here, that thanks to your solo vigilante efforts, Snape, Wilkes, Rosier - the entire little death-eater wannabe squad were basically prostrating on the floor, begging for forgiveness!”

“They piss me off-,” you began, wanting to repeat the same speech you had given Remus when the two of you had first met - that you didn’t care about honour, or revenge for the ickle first years who had fallen victim to their wrath - but Lily Evans suddenly cut you off.

“That was you?” she said, eyes wide. You didn’t even know she was listening to the conversation. “Like, you’re the person they’ve been talking about?”

James was practically bouncing up and down in his seat. “Tell us, Evans- the rumours!” Lily ignored him (for the most part), but she did in fact tell you the rumours. “They say that there’s been a monster of sorts attacking wandering students in the dead of night! But they only target the ones who no one really likes.” 

Marlene gasped, bringing her hands to her face. “So, you’re telling me that the other day, when I saw Lucius Malfoy sporting a black eye, that was you?”

Everyone in a five-seat radius of you was looking at you with new-found admiration. To top it all off, Remus patted your shoulder and announced “bullying at Hogwarts is at an all time low, thanks to (Y/n)!”

With that single touch, you basically combusted.

For all of your years here at Hogwarts, you’d remained fairly asocial. You’d sit by yourself during mealtimes, be the last to be partnered during group projects and stuff like that. The only socialising you ever got was when you beat the crap out of your enemies. 

How were you supposed to know that your enemies also happened to be everyone else’s enemies?

But still, it had all unfurled to where you were now.

And so, surrounded by Remus and the rest of your new friends, you found your lips twitching into the smallest of smiles.

—---------------------------------

It had been a few months now, since that first time you had run into Remus. And it was now, that we would be witnessing your final fight.

You were standing behind Remus, hands stuffed in pockets as per usual, whilst the boy gave his usual lecture on why not to bully others (well, ignoring the fact that you were essentially a bully now too pretty much).

Remus waved off the fifth year student you had cornered prior before turning to face you with a great smile.

Remus hadn’t been touched for the last few months either. Not with you, basically standing around as his bodyguard. Even a wrong glance at the boy would result in your death-stare gracing the halls of Hogwarts. 

“That was it,” you began, your voice quiet and hoarse.

Remus blinked at you.

You coughed. “I mean, that was the last one. There are no more delinquents left.”

“Ah,” he said. “I see.”

He exhaled, seeming to work up the courage to do something. Then, he leaned forward, taking your hands into his and smiling earnestly at you. “Well, then. Thanks, (Y/n), for putting up with me and being my partner in crime for so long. It’s been really great having you with me, a-and I’m glad we could work together.”

He laughed his little nervous laugh, the one that he usually did, and you were pretty sure that your heart rate had tripled.

Yeah, you wanted to say, but the words died coming out of your throat. Me too. We make a great pair.

Your final fight wasn’t one you were expecting. It wasn’t one that involved you beating anyone up or stringing them upside down. Instead-

You took a shaky breath, cursing yourself for getting so flustered over Remus’s words. Your fingers furled into their typical fist shapes, but rather than them swinging back (like they typically would), you rested them softly on his chest.

Ah. So your heart wasn't the only one having palpitations right now.

“(L/n)...?” Your hands gripped the front of his robes as you shut your eyes and pressed your lips to his. You can basically feel him falter against you at your action, but almost just as quickly his own lips begin to move. 

His kiss was gentle, and very, very unsure. You move your hands to the back of his neck, to press him impossibly closer to you. You don’t know what’s going on, but all you know is Remus. Remus, Remus, Remus your heart is quite literally singing.

That revelation - the one where you realise that the only reason your heart was beating was because of him - literally shoots spikes of warmth through your body. The tips of your ears are red-hot, and you were pretty sure that you were seconds away from overheating. You glance to the side, trying to hide your face from Remus.

Nevermind. Your eyes flickered back toward him. He looked dazed, and he brought his hand to brush softly against his lips. He met your gaze and you could see the blush rising to his face. He cupped his cheeks, darting away from you as you had previously done. 

You, laughing - yes, laughing - took his hands in yours once more and allowed your lips to finally reunite. 

A fight well fought, indeed.

[wonderlandwalker]

Desperate Measures | Remus Lupin x Reader

Marauders Masterlist / Taglist / Inbox

Summary: (Part 1: Desperate Times) After your break-up Remus doesn't know what to do with himself, but when he finally gets to see you again he promises himself to make it up to you by any means he can

Content Warnings/Tags: fluff, small amount of angst, big amount of smut, minord dni, 18+, unedited writing, still not sure if smut is my strong suit but won't stop me from trying

Word Count: 3.4k

A/N: A lot has happened while I took a break from writing for a little while but it basically comes down to the fact that I still struggle with my mental health on a daily basis and writing isn't always my priority. While I do not plan to stop writing any time soon, the intervals of them will probably continue to stay longer. So thank you to everyone who has the patience to wait. Anyway, today is my birthday, so this is my small gift to all of you for the occasion xx

His friends didn't dare say anything, no, they could see how he was doing, they didn't need to ask. So they let him sulk, and it's not like they hadn't tried to cheer him up, but there was nothing that seemed to work. Not the speech from James, not the distractions Sirius tried, and not even the chocolate muffins Peter swiped from the kitchen could get a smile on his face. Just letting him wait it out seemed like the best option. But as time continued to pass and Remus continued to sulk, they realised a more hands-on approach was needed.

They weren't sure if talking to you would go over well, so they decided to test the waters by talking to your friends.

"What do you want Potter" Lily glared at James as he sat down next to her.

"Don't you think it's time she apologizes"

Now see, all of them were used to the incredulous looks Lily would give James, but this one beat the record.

"What in the seven hells are you on about"

"Remus has suffered enough, he hasn't left the dorm in nearly a week."

"So?"

"So. Whatever fight they had she clearly seems fine" he gestured over to where you were sitting a little further away, breaking your pastry up into small bits to eat as you laughed with Marlene over some joke he couldn't hear.

"Don't you think she should apologise to him by now, they always make up eventually"

Lily dropped the exasperated expression as her face turned to stone while she spoke her next words.

"Yes, James, she seems fine. I found her crying her eyes out on the bathroom floor. Just because she is coping better than Remus doesn't entitle him to anything. "

James's overconfident demeanour dropped slightly. He had been worried about his friend all this time, he hadn't stopped to look at how it affected you. But when paying closer attention he could see Lily was right, there were bags under your eyes and they were still a little red, you must have cried even more after the night Lily was talking about.

"You know I care for her as well, but Remus is being stubborn, he won't even talk to us, won't even tell us what happened, we just thought that if she saw the state he is in, she'd maybe forgive him, get through to him"

"There is nothing to get through about. He broke up with her, now he's suffering the consequences, good riddance if you ask me"

Now it was James' turn to look startled

"Hang on a second. They broke up?" Lily copied his expression

"Yes they broke up, what did you idiots think was going on"

"We figured they fought, they fight sometimes but they always make up" Lily started shaking her head as she answered him.

"Not this time, he broke her heart, James. Even if he did regret it, I'm not sure she'd forgive him, and I don't think she should either"

Taking a last look at you, James bolted from the table. All this time they had simply assumed he was irritable because of a fight, but you had broken up. Not only that, it was Remus that had broken up with you. No, this would surely not do, not if they could help it.

Over the next few days, they came up with a plan to, in the easiest of terms, get Remus to beg for forgiveness. It all started with the party

"I'm really not in the mood Sirius" Remus was stretching time the most he could, but Sirius wasn't letting up.

"You've been cooked up in that bed for nearly two weeks now, people are starting to wonder if we've killed you with one of our pranks. Besides, if nothing else there'll be liquor, liquor solves everything"

Normally Remus would have argued, but strangely enough, this time Sirius had a point. But Sirius had a mission too. Yes, he was following the plan step by step. He had talked to Marlene, who had promised to get you to the party as well, which was probably a much easier task than he had been left with, seeing how after last week you had decided it was no use sitting around moping any longer.

He dragged Remus down to the party going on in the Gryffindor common room, poured him a glass of the strongest thing he could find, and got him settled on the couch. For a moment he debated getting Remus to dance, but that might have been a bit too ambitious. Either way, Remus was here now, Sirius's part was done.

Remus saw you standing on the other side of the room, and either you hadn't noticed him yet or you were simply ignoring him, but you seemed to be in your own world. And he was fine with looking at you from where he was, after all, that's the fate he had resigned himself to. He was fine with watching you because you seemed like you were enjoying yourself.

But it didn't take long for his so-called plan to crumble down like a poorly constructed house of cards. Because he saw someone walk up to you, he saw someone get close to you, someone who wasn't supposed to.

What was Evan Rosier doing at a Gryffindor party? But he didn't have much time to think about it, because he saw Evan walk up from behind you, and at first you seemed startled, but when you turned around to face him you seemed to light up. You pushed up on your toes to hug him and Remus's stomach started to twist. Not in the way it always used to when it came to you. His insides used to do somersaults every time he got a smile out of you. No matter how sour of a mood he was in, it would light him up.

His friends used to poke fun at him for it, but they soon realized you were the only thing that would cheer him up when their usual methods had run out, and they surrendered to the spell you seemed to have him under.

But this was nothing like that. Evan secured his arms around you and you let him, why did you let him? He knew he had been avoiding you, but he couldn't have missed this much. He sat there and watched, his body seemed to have turned to stone as if you had been Medusa herself. His eyes he couldn't keep off you, it was only when Evan pulled back that he thought the nausea that had bubbled up in his stomach would disappear, but he couldn't have been more wrong. Because the moment he did, Evan took off his jacket, and put it around you. The green colour of it engulfed you and Remus was filled with it just the same.

He felt as if he wasn't in control of his own body as he stood up from the couch, walking in your direction. He wasn't even sure what he would say, what he would do, but he could no longer sit and watch idly. So when Remus reached you he did the only thing that made sense to him, he pulled you in and kissed you. He kissed you like he had thought about doing every minute for the last few weeks. He had wondered if your lips were still as soft as they used to be, what a stupid question, he thought now, of course they were.

For just a second his life is back the way it should be, you're kissing him as if it's pure muscle memory, and perhaps it is because only a moment later you seem to come to your senses and pull away. But you're still looking at him, and your eyes have him just as Enchanted as the first time he saw you. He recognizes a small sparkle in them and promises himself to make it ablaze again.

"Can we talk, please" He is ready to get down on his knees and beg you, because he doesn't know if he can stand being without you anymore. He would drop to the floor and grovel for your forgiveness if that was what it took, but of course, you don't make him. Even before he's always been ready to tear his heart from his chest and give it to you the moment you requested so. He would watch it continue to beat as he ripped it out because by now it was entirely yours anyway, it wouldn't stop as long as you were near, wouldn't dare let you down.

You nod your head to the stairs leading up to the dorms and he walks with you until you're in the dorm, the door shutting behind you. He wants to push you up against the door and trail kisses down your neck like he used to, but he can tell you have something to say, so he sits down on the foot of your bed, trying not to fidget with his hands too much.

"You really hurt me Remus" The way your eyebrows slightly pinch together and the slight pout on your face makes him once again regret every single word he uttered that night. He's trying to think of what to say, how to continue. Because he's gotten this far and he's determined not to mess up again. But what is there to say, what can he say other than the fact that he's sorry, which seems like too much of an understatement for the situation he created.

"I know" is all he can come up with, and it's true, he spent so much time thinking about what he had done and how it had hurt you.

"I don't know if I'm ready to just move on as if nothing happened"

"I know" Remus wants to smack his own head for his response. This was his one chance to make it right and he couldn't even form a coherent thought.

"I'm sorry" is all he can say next, and he wants to smack himself again for the oversimplification. But you look at him as if it's enough, as if you know the weight those words truly hold behind them. He wouldn't be surprised if you could see right into his mind, you've always been able to read him so well.

"Please let me make it up to you, I promise I will" You look at him again, and walk closer to where he is sitting.

"How exactly do you propose to do that?" Your tone has shifted, and he's still nervous, but no longer for the same reason. It's the kind of nervous jitters he still gets when he's close to you, the kind that makes him want to pin you down underneath him and spend eternity looking at you. Except this time he's not sure what to do. He usually knows exactly what you want, has got your body memorised like a map that leads to treasure. But now he needs to tread more lightly, not taking any chance of having read it wrong.

But you walk towards him until you've slotted yourself between his open legs, and he knows it is all going to be okay, because you start to softly move your hands through his hair in a way that makes his head spin, and he grounds himself by pulling you closer, hugging his face to your stomach. He lets himself enjoy it for a few seconds before he remembers the promise he just made.

He starts to leave small kisses going up your torso, and ghosts his fingers over the back of your thighs as you're still standing in front of him. He holds your body closer to his and hears a small moan leave your mouth. And it's only softly, but he hears it, and it’s his sign not to stop.

His hands move with a mind of their own, trailing further up until he reaches under your skirt, finding the soft flesh of your ass and giving it a gentle squeeze before he retracts one of his hands to slap it. And now he’s sure, because the sound that leaves you is no longer hesitant, it's pleading. He grabs onto your legs and flips you over onto the bed behind him, your head hitting the pillow as he hovers over you.

You move to kiss him, and he doesn't dare refuse. It’s different from earlier, more desperate. Not only his but your emotions showing through it, it's harsh, too much teeth, too forceful, but he can't find it in himself to mind. He kisses you back with just as much passion, and while he could spend eternity like this, he had something else in mind for now. So he moves his lips down your neck, and you arch into him immediately, giving him better access to the spot he’s looking for.

“Remus please” he doesn't need to be told twice, not today at least. His hands inch up underneath your shirt, delicately moving it up your body until it reaches your head, and you don’t hesitate to shrug it off and throw it off the bed. He’s enthralled for a moment, the sight before his eyes so familiar yet so captivating.

He makes quick work of his own shirt and moves back to leave open-mouth kisses down your chest as his hands once again travel down. But he doesn't make you wait long, because it’s followed by him moving your underwear to the side, sliding his fingers over your folds, feeling how wet you already are for him. His mouth is still busy on your chest, reacting to the sounds you make as he’s sucking bruises into your skin. With his free hand he tugs down your bra, finally giving him full access to your chest. The moment his mouth grazes over your nipple you moan out his name and he starts circling your clit before inserting two of his fingers into you. Your body immediately remembers the feeling and he can feel you already starting to clench around him, but he’s not about to question it. He’s still using his thumb to trace patterns onto your clit as he moves his fingers in and out of you, searching for the spot he knows will make you see the stars. He curls them once again and from the sounds leaving you he knows he’s found it, relentlessly hitting it as if it's his only goal in life, and right now it is.

It doesn't take much longer until you’re panting and writhing underneath him, and he has to use his free hand to pin your hips down on the mattress. As moans and whispers of his name continue to stream from you he wonders how he ever thought he could make peace with never hearing you say his name again, but he doesn't dwell on it for long as he feels you spasming around his fingers, clenching as if your body is trying to keep him there. He coaxes you through it until your breathing turns back to normal and he pulls his fingers out, hovering back over you as he cleans them off with his mouth, humming at the taste.

You’re starting to come back down from your haze and he can feel your hands travelling over his body before one of them drags over the bulge in his trousers. The friction makes him close his eyes and sighs, dropping his head in the crook of your neck. You’re trying to undo his belt when he snaps back to reality, catching your hands in his own as he stops you.

“What’s wrong?” The concern in your voice makes him want to soothe away any worries you might be carrying, and he’s quick to tell you.

“Nothing’s wrong darling, I’m just not finished apologizing yet.” It’s not that he doesn't want to feel your hands on him, pumping him as he loses his composure, but he’s already painfully hard from making you cum on his fingers, and he wasn't finished.

And so with a final kiss to your lips he shifts back down your body until he's face to face with your pussy. You’re fidgeting underneath him and he uses his hands to lock your legs in place, holding them open so he can do exactly as he wants. He starts by tickling your inner thighs with kisses, enjoying the feeling of your skin against his. Normally he would take his time, get you desperate underneath him, but he’s the desperate one now, so he doesn't waste any more time. His tongue flattens out over your entrance and a whine of his name leaves your mouth, followed by more moans that make him rut into the mattress, seeking for some friction of his own.

He distracts himself by massaging the fat of your thighs, trailing over the stretch marks he adores. You're rutting your hips into his mouth and when your hand finds purchase in his hair, tugging on it as his tongue enters your folds, he no longer tries to hold back. His attack on you is so sweetly malicious, your taste intoxicating hum further than any liquor could, he grinds down and moans into you. The vibrations make your breath hitch and he can feel you getting close again. The soft pleas and whines coming from you are a melody he will orchestrate for as long as he can, his nose bumps against your clit as his tongue is still busy lapping up your juices and it makes you twitch under him.

“That's it darling, cum all over my tongue” He's craving it just as much himself, every shaky breath from you and every time he feels you clench he gets closer to his own high. All he wants to do is get you there so he can let go himself. He doubles his efforts, remembering what you like, listening to your body react, and with his mouth still busy between your legs you suddenly go still, your body motionless except for the small flexes of the muscles in your thighs. He knows better than to stop, coaxing you further until the filthiest of moans come from your mouth, relentlessly thanking him, although he's certain he should be the one thanking you.

He's still chasing your sweet taste as he can feel his cock straining impossibly hard, the tip pulsating as he finds his own release, too caught up in you to even care that he is coming in his trousers, whines leaving his mouth as he still laps up anything you give him. He doesn't stop until you push his head away and he glances up at your face, a thin layer of sweat glistening above your eyebrows. You're radiating pure ecstasy and he can't help but smile at the sight. You silently ask him to come up by tugging the back of his neck towards you and he wouldn't even dream of doing anything other than complying.

“I've missed you Remmy” it's barely there, your voice a whisper in the now quiet room, but it's more than enough for him. He leaves featherlight kisses over your face, from your forehead to your cheekbone and finally finding his final destination on your lips. It's soft, sensual and full of pent up emotions and apologies, but the way in which you settle yourself next to him, cuddling into him with a content sigh as if he's the puzzle piece you fit next to let's him know that despite everything, you'll always find your way back to each other, even in the most desperate of times.

Taglist: @hesperdern, @lexmoon17, @y0urm0m12, @dreamingofmarauders

[unconventional-lawnchair]

I'll Look After You: Prologue

Sirius Black x Reader / Remus Lupin x Reader / Remus Lupin x Sirius Black

Masterlist Series Masterlist

Summary: the set up for GOF timeline, Harry and reader reunite over the summer, Remus and Sirius as well

Cw: Use of {Y/N}, the Durley's}

Wc- 1909

Taglist- @otterlockholmes @stylesann

“My dearest Harry,

I am sorry it has taken this long. It shouldn't have been more than a week, but you are aware of everything that has happened since I returned home.

The ministry, as I expected, came to me first when they had heard of Sirius Black’s escape from Hogwarts. They have dropped all accusations on behalf of Bartemius Crouch Sr, our Minister. I have been allowed my properties and seized possessions. I am home now, Remus has joined me, and Padfoot is two days out. 

Another thing the Ministry has returned to me, is my title as your godmother. It was reinstated yesterday, and as I am regretful that it took a month, Harry, you will be coming home.

The papers have been sent. I must give you fair warning, Harry, when you return to me, you will also be returning to the {L/N} house hold. Much like the Blacks, we have a reputation. My father, for one, was not too pleased with my involvement with the Potters since day one. I will fight for you, Harry. I will. I do not expect you to bend to the pressure, but I will always hope our relationship is open and honest.

Forever here, {Y/N}”

Home. He was going home. Harry didn't think he had ever smiled so much while at the Dursleys’. 

“You should feel lucky boy. I could have fought it, thirteen years too late if you ask me!” Mr. Dursley huffed from the head of the table, flicking through his newspaper. They had just finished dinner, it was late, and Harry found himself fidgeting. He was packed, he was ready, tonight he was going to start over. With family. People who loved him. “But the sooner you're gone, the better it is for everyone.”

“I agree.” Harry snarked and stood up, leaving Mr. Dursley stunned and blabbering like a fish. Harry wasn't scared anymore. The paperwork was signed yesterday, and in just a few more minutes, you would be here, and you would take him home. 

“No respect! Fed and housed you all this time! Still, you seem to think-” His words were interrupted by a firm knock on the door. Harry lit up and practically dashed off to it, before he slowed to a stop as Petunia stepped in front of him. She looked in the side mirror and made herself presentable, fixing her dress and huffing. Turning to glare at Harry before she opened the door.

…

You were standing on the doorsteps of that same bloody house. Merlin, you always said if you ever saw any of them again it would be too damn soon. You were staring off at the street, until you heard the door finally open.

Turning, you had to hide a wince as you saw Lily's sister. She looked like all those tears did a number on her when she was younger, her face was pinched and tart, like a damned sour sprout from Honeydukes. You smiled sweetly at her, even when she began to shove Harry’s luggage out like it was trash. “Abandoned him for thirteen years, hm? Now you're finally here?”

“Fantastic to see you again as well, Petunia. Haven't aged a day.” You purred with a wink and looked around her. When Harry's eyes landed on yours, you both smiled like absolute fools. You 

opened your arms and Harry squirmed past his aunt with a small, “Excuse me,” before he practically tackled you.

You had a delighted laugh and held him tighter, spinning in a small circle, so distracted by each other Petunia finally gave in with a scoff. Waving you both off. Pulling away you quickly began to fix his clothes and hair, putting his glasses back proper on his face.

“Are you ready?” You asked and began to pick up his things, he quickly moved to help you, grabbing his actual luggage bag as you grabbed his smaller bags, holding Hedwig. 

“Ready.” Harry nodded and you walked down to the street. He stared at you curiously before you waved your hand and suddenly, a large black car pulled up. It seemed more in line with a chauffeur and luxury ride. 

You waved your hand again and the trunk and back doors popped open. You began to load up the back seat and hurried around to help Harry slip his things into the trunk.

Once everything was packed away, you both got in. You looked at him and smiled, he returned it. Looking around once more, you shifted the car’s stick shift, and suddenly, it became as dark as the night outside. Harry gave a laugh and shook his head, you turned to him and tilted your head curiously.

“Just a bout of deja vu.”

~~~  

You drove for a few hours, gliding above the clouds as Harry kept you company with stories of the remaining days at Hogwarts before summer. Eventually, his voice faded into silence. You two enjoyed a bit of quiet, before you asked him if he'd like to listen to some music his mother loved. He lit up as you reached over to the glove box and took out a few cds. 

You turned a few on loop for him, and eventually, you were greeted by his soft snores. You lit up at the sudden squeeze to your chest. So much love ached in you, like this was how it was meant to be. For years now. 

Eventually, you landed in an open field, hidden deep within the thick and vibrant green forests of the Scottish countryside. You were isolated, when you and Sirius were younger, this was the best of both worlds. Space, quiet, away from London, but also full of life and peaceful wonder, a place you thought you'd raise a child one day. Well, you weren't entirely wrong. You were happy to be the one to finally clip Harry free of that horrid house.

You gave a frown as you leaned over and rubbed Harry's shoulder. You hated to wake him.

He snapped his head up and blinked a few times. “We are almost there.” You whispered to him and he glanced around himself in curious and baffled silence. 

“Where are we?” He mumbled. You suddenly laughed, remembering all that Harry could see was the thick forest around you. “Sorry, Harry. We are going to 1 Grindlebay coast.” You whispered and stared at him, as you watched his eyes snapped open wide.

For him, the trees before you sunk below, to the ground and completely out of view. the ones that lined the entrance curved and bent, until their branches threaded together in a nature made entrance. Gravel and thick cobblestone shot from the dirt and created a path, one you began to drive down.

Eventually, you made it to a huge open property, with a single cottage right by the path, entrapping you between thick dense trees and the cobbled gate around the small yard. 

He was slack jawed, turning to you and you couldn't help but laugh. “Grand, isn't it? Even with something so simple, Sirius still insisted on something remarkable.” You mumbled and looked at the door. 

There was Lupin, standing with Sirius. Harry noticed them and began to hurry out of the car. You climbed out of it yourself. Leaning over the trunk to watch as Harry ran to Sirius and Black hugged him just as tight back. Lupin was going to come help you with the bags, before Sirius yanked him into the hug as well. You felt like you could melt, just watching your boys greet each other.

“You know, it's very impolite to let a lady carry your things in for you, Harry.” Remus teased and Harry quickly pulled away to watch as you waved your wand and his things began to unpack from the car and float to the door. Sirius jumped to the side and laughed, having been standing in the path. You walked over and smirked at him. 

“Planning to concuss me, hm?” Sirius mused and you rolled your eyes. “I've tried too many times to think it's still possible, Black.”

“What's that mean, pretty girl?”

“It means-” You paused and pointed at him. “Don't call me that. It means, in order to concuss you, you'd have to have a brain up there for it to work. I think Quidditch did you and James a misfortune in that regard.”

Your heart hurts a bit. Not hearing James’ signature offended gasp, and Lily's condescending and playful coos for his pride.

Remus watched your banter and couldn't help but smile. Harry gave a bright smile as well.

Sirius rolled his eyes fondly. You took him in, the week away did him good. He was cleaned up, shaven, and looked much more managed. “Though, it never did do away with your grooming habits, did it?” You reached forward and fiddled with his hair a moment before turning his shoulder to push him inside.

You turned to Remus and Harry next, gesturing them in. “Come on then, you need to get settled, Remus, can you show him to his room?”

Remus nodded and clapped his hand to Harry’s shoulder. “Right we go, Harry.” 

The exterior made the house seem little more than a single room, but much like a tent when you walked inside it quickly grew in size. You and Sirius had charmed it after it temporarily became one of you and your friends' many safe houses. When you were still all together.

It was two stories, with a cozy feel to it. Remus led him down the hall and up the stairs which was where the guest rooms were. 

You watched them wonder off before you turned to Sirius with a small patient smile. “Where are your things?” 

“I uhm.. put them in the spare room down the hall from our- from yours.” He corrected himself and your face fell a bit. You didn't want to say it, but you did feel a bit nervous about what Sirius would want when he returned. You didn't know what you expected. You were no longer engaged. You were the one who gave the ring back. You were the one with the idea to call it off. You were the one who wanted more than he was willing to give. You just figured, maybe, he was ready to let his pride away and admit to you that there was more to it then just Remus that made him not want to continue. You shook the thought away. 

Emotions were bothersome.

“Well, Sirius. I looked over what I could salvage from the years, plenty of your clothes still in the old room. Then we can look into getting you and Harry some new summer clothes.” You mused with a wave of your hand. He gave you a thinned smile, nodded before he turned to stray further into the house. 

They left you with your thoughts, you could hear Harry and Remus’s voices from above you, fought back the urge to join them. Turning to walk into the living room. Looking around at all the photos and evidence of life. Everything is still like you left it all those years ago. Waving your wand to straighten everything. You have done several cleaning spells, but it didn't save the discolored furniture and foggy photographs half eaten by the moths. Then you remembered. The photo album. You had a treat for Harry once he was settled.

[gotranting]

Not alone anymore - Remus Lupin x female Reader

If you came across this before, it is the same fanfic, I just moved to my side tumblr)

It started out as me writing down some random prompts. Then I actually expanded it...and this is the result. It's also the first time I wrote something like this, and it is for my own amusement. But maybe someone will like it I don't know. The whole story is written in some strange form. Maybe I'll do something with it at some point.

There is a mention of sexual assault. Very brief.

You lived in the muggle world for quite many a years now. Graduated Hogwarts a few years ago you were finding your way at 21 years old. You went to the muggles in order to enjoy some simpler things for a while. Buy yourself a gramophone for your little cottage. Walk your dog through the forest surrounding it. Pick herbs for your tea collection. A simple life. No magic. At least not for fighting. You were 21 years old after all, magic still came in handy. Even if you casted simple charms to clean up the mess when you were too lazy to do so on your own.

When it comes to defense you've learned how to fight the muggle way. You found your way around daggers. You didn't have to use them often. It just felt safer having something around.

With the return of Voldemort, Moody found you again and recruited you into the Order of the Phoenix. What peace you had was over. You and your dog were to come to the Grimmauld place number 12.

Having spent so much time only fighting in the muggle ways, you needed to remember how to duel as you once did before. What you once learned never left you, but some practice would be good. Remus was appointed to train with you.

It didn't take long. As the lessons went you were coming back to your former self. Remus was a good duel partner. You had to admit you missed dueling.

And lesson by lesson, you learned more about each other. It's the simple things at the beginning. Which house you were both in during your Hogwarts years. Favourite subjects. Favourite moments from your time in Hogwarts. It came naturally you suppose. Talking with him. At times you were surprised how easy it actually was, after shutting yourself out for so long. But he listened. And if Remus saw you needed time trust him, he did not push you. If you wanted to talk, he would be there. If not, he found himself sharing some of the mischief the Marauders got into (there were loads of those stories). When there was nothing to be said, you were at peace just dueling with each other – working on improving your spellwork.

I suppose those moments became something you both started to look forward to more and more as months went by. Not because there were feelings right away. Simply because in those moments... after a long time of being alone you both found peace, while having someone near. Remus kept himself away from society you see. What could he offer to them? How long could he keep up the mask, before a possible friend found out what he was? Before they inevitably ran away. One friend betrayed them all. Another was gone. Sirius was there but he had enough of his own things to deal with. Nevertheless he was the only one Remus let closer in. You were a surprise.

As for you, you did not let anyone in either. You enjoyed your solitude too much. Besides, letting someone in was always a risk. You did a good enough job at pushing people away. Letting someone in meant they would leave at some point. You would let them in only to lose them some day. That kind of pain was not needed.

Do not take these words as the sole reason for your isolation. As I've said, you were happy on your own. Luna grew very fond of you once, you two met. You fought for the world out there, you would never shut the reality out. But when you could, you were in your own world. So he was a surprise to you as well.

I do not know when the feelings started. Maybe it was the first time, Remus found himself wanting to tell you more than a funny story from his younger years. Maybe it was the first time you didn't feel annoyed at the thought of having someone accompany you and your dog in your evening walk through the woods. Maybe, while you thought of that in late October, there was a brief scent of chocolate that made itself at home in your mind.

No, that can't be it.

It can't be the longer gazes when the other wasn't looking. You must have been distracted by something, and it just happened that you were looking at Remus at the time. And it wasn't that he found the joy on your face endearing, while you were looking at the orange leaves through the window. It was just nice to see someone enjoying the little moments in life. That is all. So he thought nothing of it, when he found himself bringing you a few rosehips bound with some maple leaves from one of his walks. The world has enough darkness as it is. Why not do something small for someone else?

It is not as if Remus did not do that for other people. However, he spent over an hour thinking if that little bouquet would be to your liking.

No that can't be the moment you two felt something.

And it wasn't that one time during your duel. See, if you are to fight with daggers, the stance is different than one would have when using a wand. And you fought long enough, that the slightly hunched postion stuck with you. You did not think of anything particular when Remus asked if he can correct your posture. It was strange though that you did not feel threatened with someone in such a close proximity to you. You did not think much  when he came up behind you. You did not think much when one of his hands went to your shoulder. The other went on your middle back, so that he could straighten you up. You did not think much of it when you both stood there longer than you were meant to. If there was a hitch in your breathing, it was from tiredness. If he wanted to move closer, it was...comfort. Alone for so long, when one does not want to be, it leaves you seeking out some contact from a person you see as a. Friend. That is all. Neither of you noticed that his hand now rested near your own by your side. And when you did, he muttered a sorry. He knew you were not fond of contact. „You stupid fool. Must you frighten everyone away?“ 

Remus had no idea, you were on the verge of turning around. What would happen then can now be only left for wondering.

Padfoot was the first to see something changed. Shortly after, Molly would follow. Remus could only stare at you in awe that many times before Padfoot noticed his friend was acting strange. He knew him for 27 years, and yet he had never seen him so flustered as it was when you came to the kitchen to make yourself some tea. Poor soul could not decide if the newspapers in his hands were the most interesting thing, or your humming while waiting for the kettle to boil. He settled on reading the same sentence for the next 15 minutes. Needless to say, Sirius had the most wonderful time that day. Who would have known you could make a person miss the steps with only a mention of a name. It felt as if they were back in Hogwarts all over again. For now, serious conversations will have to wait, Sirius concluded. Some harmless fun first. Then he would see if this was only a stronger fondness. Or if it was something Moony would have a harder time accepting.

Molly did not have much time for motherly questioning. You were all at Grimmauld that evening. Except for Remus. For the last three weeks you were all  making plans on how to get more people on your side. Voldemort had an army. And the Order was at a high disadvantage. Hagrid went to persuade the giants. Remus went to persuade the werewolves. Five days now, there was no word. On the sixth day, Hagrid returned. Not with the news you were hoping for. Seventh day, there was no word from Remus.

Yes, you knew Remus was a werewolf. The members of the Order have to trust each other. Keeping secrets would only end up dividing you further. With the small number of you already, you could not risk it. Nevertheless, you found out accidentally. Dumbledore was supposed to brief you on it before the third full moon after you joined the Order. Snape however decided to remind everyone of what Remus was during one of the meetings. You were just showing Mr Weasley one of your knives, discussing whether you could enchant it, when Snape mentioned it would be wise to keep it by your side for the next few days.

„Is there someone particular I should  keep an eye out for?“

„Not someone. Something. If I were you, I would find a poison for that knife. I'm sure I could brew you one to repel a werewolf. We already have one monster, it would be a shame you succumbed to the same fate.“

„You fucking bastard..“

„Sirius that is enough.“

That was your introduction to Remus's lycanthropy. Despite living in the muggle world, you knew the general attitude towards werewolves. Snape just reminded you of it. Thinking back to that day, you still remember how it took days for Remus to start dueling with you again. Days of trying to tell him that you have seen enough monsters to recognize one.

„I did kill monsters with these knives before. There was one that thought how it would be fun to go after a girl trying to get home in the middle of the night. He thought it would be fun to put a hand over my mouth while feeling me up. He even laughed while doing it. Stopped laughing when he felt something warm leaking from his side.“

That was the first time, she told him something more than harmless bits and pieces of her life.

„It was not the first time I killed a monster you know. There is a reason I went to the muggle world. I've spent a long time fighting monsters. I had to take a break, because I wanted to find something else that will drive me in life. But magic, or muggle world, there are always monsters. I just changed a weapon“, she said. When he finally met her eyes she looked at him for a while before uttering: „I will not use those knives against you. I do not plan on poisoning them, because I need them for those who are a threat to this world. I cannot convince you, no. But just because the people around present you as a monster is not enough for me to believe you are one. Even if you believe their words. There are werewolves who committed all sorts of crimes. I know of Greyback. It is not lycanthropy that made him like that.“  After thinking for a few moments she added: „I know you've done this on your own for a long enough time. But if you ever need anything let me know. I do not plan on forcing you to be in the same room as me. Remember though, that is your decision, not mine. If you need anything, I will be here.“

She left him sitting at the table that night staring at his own hands. It took him four more days to process it all. On the fifth, they started dueling again. I guess that conversation also contributed to him beginning to look at her for five seconds longer. And longer as days went by.

Eighth day. No one expected him to collapse upon entering the house. Sirius and Mr Weasley were quick to bring Remus to one of the sofas. No one gave a damn that the cushions were soaking up the blood. Despite me saying that she was in her own world, she could snap out of it in a matter of seconds. Seeing the slash on his chest and on his neck left no time to stand around.

It feels like a blur. You are doing everything automatically after so many times. Bring the gauzes. Press hard on the wounds. Sirius kept him from falling asleep. Cut what little remained of the shirt. Assess the wound and the depth of it. Looks like claws. Infected. Bring more gauze now. „Sirius press harder on the neck or he will bleed out!“ „I used the spell, why is he still bleeding!?“

„Sirius hold him down!“

I do not know how much time passed. They've managed to sew the wounds in the end. But he was weak from travelling and from the fight. The werewolves will not join either side.

As Remus rested, she did not leave his side. Not even Molly could order her to do so.

Molly found her reminding his sleeping form how she would be there if he needed her. For the second time his hand covered hers. There was a murmured „thank you“ and „stay“.

Maybe the two did not see it yet. Molly did. Sirius did. It was not a simple fondness. For now though, all that mattered was that Remus is alive. For now he needs to rest. And you're there with him. That is enough.

[hotchfiles]

edge of eighteen.

pairing: remus x reader.

content warnings: mostly teen angst and a bit of fluff. reader insert with no use of names or “y/n”. just teens being teens and remus trying to bolt as usual. happy ending.

word count: a bit over 1k.

      You shifted in your bed, suddenly feeling the late night cold hit you, still with your eyes closed, you let your hand wander around searching for the sole responsible to keeping you warm, only to quickly notice he was not there.

      You open your eyes and sit on the bed of your childhood room, you were spending time there after graduating while you and Remus looked for jobs and a good cheap place to live together. Your parents adored him so he would spend most days and nights there as well.

      Tea? You thought, he would sometimes wake up in the middle of the night and go to the kitchen for some to help him go back to sleeping. Unfortunately, you quickly realized that was not it as you noticed Remus going through the closet, apparently taking out the clothes he already had left there as it was more convenient.

      His baggage was open, the RJL shining whenever it was hit by the light of his wand, you felt rage you didn’t even know you had inside of you, ready to punch him or worse, but you knew of your own insecurities and fears so you controlled your gut reaction, maybe his mother needed him for something. Maybe one of the marauders was in trouble.

      Maybe it wasn’t what it looked like.

      “Remus? What’s going on?” You asked in almost a whisper, but enough to stop him on his tracks and make his eyes lock on yours, if only for a second.

      He was startled, you were a heavy sleeper, this wasn’t supposed to happen, he tried to swallow the pit of despair developing on his throat, his lips as dry as humanly possible, guilt being written all over him, no need of an answer.

      “Were you about to fucking leave me?” You say in the most angry tone he has ever heard from you, but still controlling the volume not to wake your family. You knew this self control wouldn’t last another second, so as you got up and switched the lights on, you made sure to enchant the door, leaving your wand on your bed as you walked over to the open luggage.

      “Please, please don’t make this harder for me.” His voice trembled and you felt like hugging him and telling him it was okay, that he didn’t need to do this. You were not that type of witch though, and he knew that when he chose to kiss you during the sixth year.

      “Oh no sir, I feel like m’gonna make this a lot harder, impossible even.” You were firm, but the hint of sarcasm was obvious, you took his baggage from the chair it was placed, too quick for him to stop you and emptied it on your bed. “M’not some girl you can just leave, Lupin.”

      Remus followed you but made sure to keep distance, he even made motion to try and put his stuff back, but stopped when he saw the fury in your eyes, don’t you dare being silently told without being spoken.

      “I just—I have to, I let myself enjoy this for far too long.”

      His brain practically hurt, thinking hard behind his burrowed eyebrows, he was a planner, he was trying to find the right words that would stop this from becoming to much of a fight. You two never fought, he wanted to keep that memory intact.

      “No.”

      “What do you mean no—” He couldn’t even finish his sentence before being surprised once again by you picking a portion of his things with both arms, walking towards your tiny closet and throwing it there.

      “I mean fucking no, you are not ruining this for no fucking reason, I’m not letting you, I’m not allowing you to, so no.”

      “You can’t just prohibit me from doing what I need to do to protect you, woman!” He exasperated in a sigh, his hands passing through his sandy hair, his cheeks getting red in frustration. Remus still with his wand in hand, silently orders his luggage and items you had displaced to organize itself.

      “Protect me? From what? From you? From Moony?” You were forced to laugh, it was harsh, painful, almost cruel. “We both know I can handle either of them.”

You were right, you were an incredible witch, strong-willed, way too stubborn for your own good but it usually meant you got yourself out of any situation imposed on you, not afraid of anything, ready, reckless.

      “From a future with me.” His voice was loud, louder than you ever heard him, laced with fear and frustration only an eighteen old boy starting his life could feel.

      But Remus was not just an eighteen old boy. He was a werewolf, fated to disgrace, bad jobs, bad money, bad life.

      He had no bright future to provide, and even if you could handle Moony at his worst, Remus would not ruin your chances at a successful life.

      “What gives you that right, Lupin?” The last nome being the only form of reference since the beginning of the argument was just one of your ways to show him how mad you were that this discussion was even happening after almost two years of relationship.

      Love, Remus believed love gave him the right to make that choice for the both of you, the hard choice, the right choice. But he didn't answer, looking up to your ceiling to take a deep breath, he was starting to feel like his eyes were about to water and that was not the time for that.

      "You think that little of me? That I'm not able to decide for my own what is good for me?" Again, no words from him in response, both his hands gripping tight on his own waist as he kept breathing, trying to be firm, trying to maintain his choice, his plan. His eyes only came back to yours when you asked if he enjoyed it, confusion clear, not understanding what you meant by that. "Seeing me hurt, do you enjoy it?"

      It was a cruel move, you would admit it if asked, but you were starting to feel desperate, the mix of that with your short temper and the fact his actions were cruel despite his reasoning gave you all the permission to go as low as you wanted to.

      "You know I don't... Don't do that to me." His face contorted, his eyes wet, his voice merely a whisper, you held out your hand, your heart twitching in pain, ready to break at any moment, and you swore for a second he wouldn't take it, but he did, still not getting closer to you, but now you could feel the trembling and the cold sweat that was consuming him whole.

      You both stayed like that for a few seconds, but it seemed like hours, arms stretched, fingers intertwined, but you wouldn't take the first step towards him, you needed him to do it, you needed him to forget the whole thing, to apologize, to hug you and smell your hair like he always did. "If you leave I might have a future, but I won't have a life to live." That was the softest you had sounded since you had woken up, the rage completely overshadowed by fear and sadness and grief for your relationship if he was to go.

      And he caved, he could possibly live knowing he left you hating him, angry with all that fiery rage he knew so well you had in you, but not like this, not vulnerable and hurt and about to cry because of him. Remus sighed and pulled you into his arms in a hug, just like you wanted, his hand going through your hair as you begin to sob, relaxing surrounded by his warmth.

      "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, shhhh" He repeated it like a mantra, trying to stop you from crying but to no avail. "Next time I swear I'll make sure not to wake you." You let go of him immediately, searching for his eyes and finding his mischievous smirk looking at you, teasing you to lift up your mood or to get you riled up again so you would stop with all the tears that hurt him so much to watch.

      "Try something like this again and your dead body will be the only thing on that luggage, Remy." You reply to his teasing, but there's not a slight of playfulness in your tone, expect for the nickname you would regularly use to call him. He chuckled and nodded, silently agreeing not to do anything of the sort again, placing soft kisses on both your eyelids as he cleaned your cheeks with his thumbs.

      "Wait, the door is still imperturbed, right?" he asked referring to the charm you had casted earlier not to wake anyone, you replied with a nod and the smirk came back to his lips with even more malice, pushing you lightly towards the bed and hovering over you, muffling a laugh coming from you with a passionate kiss.

      Remus might feel like he has the weight of the world on his shoulders, still, he's only an eighteen years old boy who would not miss the opportunity to make out with his beautiful, stubborn, strong-willed girlfriend.

[moonyeyedstar]

pt2 Forgive Me, Father- Remus Lupin x Reader Smut (Priest Remus)

*18+* part 2!

You shut the curtain as you sat in the wooden booth you had grown accustomed to.  Your arousal pooled between your thighs at the thought of what was to come.  “Forgive me, Father Lupin for I have sinned,” your voice was low and breathless.  You could not wait for him to rip down the divider and have his way with you.

“Y/n,” he said firmly, trying to sound frustrated but his temptation betrayed him, “I told you not to come to see me here, we had plans for later, it’s not safe for you to come here.”

“But I could not wait, Father, I need you now, please, don’t let me suffer,” you begged.

“But, Y/n, if someone finds out-” you had cut him off.

“They won’t.”

“This is wrong.”

“So punish me then, punish me for my sins,” you said in a quiet sultry tone.

“Jesus Christ,” he tore down the divider that separated the two of you.  You shot him a salacious smile.

“Hello Father,” you squeezed your thighs together in need of friction and let out a gentle whimper, loving the sight of him in his clerical collar.  The sight of you flushed and needy was more than enough to abandon every vow he had ever taken in the House of God.

“God, you don’t know what I want to do to you,” he growled under his breath as he studied every inch of you, his eyes glimmering with pure unadulterated lust, his mind filled with thoughts so sinful he should have caught on fire in that very moment.

“Why don’t you show me then,” you began undressing yourself to lead him into temptation.  His eyes flickered from one part of your luscious skin to the next.  You sat before him completely nude against the cold wooden bench and watched as he grew to fight the constraints of his trousers.

“Hands and knees,” he barked.

“What?” you were taken aback by this side of him.

“You heard me.  Hands and knees.”

“Yes, Father,” you fell to your hands and knees, pressing your plump arse up toward him to put your slick folds on display.

“Oh, darling, you are soaked, I guess you really couldn’t wait until later, hm?” he teased.

“Please don’t tease me, Remus, I need you so badly.”

“What did you call me?”

“I’m sorry, Father.”  Your apology would not suffice as Father Lupin’s cold heavy hand met the soft supple skin of your arse with a loud smack that echoed through the booth.  You let out a cry.  His handprint stung on your skin and quickly turned bright red.

“How do you address me?”  He coached.

“Father,” you blurted in an instant having learned your lesson.

“Good girl,” he praised.  You waited impatiently on your hands and knees as the cold porcelain tile began to warm beneath you.  Father Lupin undid his trousers and pumped himself as he stared at you positioned perfectly before him.  He was so unbelievably hard, his tip dripping.  “Fucking hell,” he mumbled to himself before gripping your cheeks to split them apart, giving himself a clear view to watch himself ruin you.  He pressed his slick swollen tip against your cunt.  You whined and squirmed yourself around him to try and press him onto yourself.  He pulled himself back to tease you and watched as your hips kept chasing after his cock.  You let out desperate whines in protest, luring him to press himself into you as he was slowly swallowed by your warmth.

“Oh, Father!”  You cried out as your walls grasped his cock.  “You feel so good,” your walls fluttered around his twitching cock.  Father Lupin could not tear his eyes away from the sight of himself fucking in and out of your tight cunt.

“Such a good girl,” he praised and began to increase the pace and force of his thrusts.  The sound of his skin smacking against yours fought to be heard against your breathless moaning.  “God, and such a perfect pussy, you take me so well,” he growls, resisting the urge to let his head fall back and tear his eyes away from you.  His grip on you tightened, he kept you firmly in place as he drove himself in and out of you mercilessly.  Your walls spasmed around his cock as he stuffed you each and every time.

“S-So good,” you cried out drunkenly, intoxicated by the way he fucked you like the dirty whore you are.  He slid one hand off of your arse and up your spine making you shudder before he grabbed a fistful of your hair and tugged it back, forcing your head and neck to extend towards him.

“Look at me,” he ordered.  He pulled your hair to tilt your head as far back as possible.  You choked out moans looking back at him.  “Open your mouth.”  You did as told, letting your mouth fall open.  “Such a filthy slut, couldn’t even wait for me at home,” he growled before spitting into your mouth.  You stared up at him wide-eyed, entranced by his dominance as you felt your orgasm build in your core.

“S-So close,” you whimpered.

“You will cum when I tell you to,” he growled and continued to pound in and out of you at a relentless pace.  

“Yes, Father,” you cried out as your back arched to fit him deep inside yourself.  He gripped your hair painfully tight and snaked his free hand off your side to rub circles on your swollen clit.  “Oh god yes!”  Your arms fail you letting you fall forward, luckily Father Lupin’s grasp on your hair was enough to keep you upright.  “Oh, please Father, I cannot hold it much longer,” you pleaded.

“Cum for me, Y/n,” he commanded.

“Oh, Father Lupin!” your cunt spasmed around his cock as you dissolved into pleasure, your vision fading to black as he continued to assault your pussy.  Your moans were muffled and incoherent as you fell limp.

“Where should I cum?” he grunted.

“My cunt, Father,” you whined hazily.

“Fuck,” he growled as his hips stuttered and he emptied himself inside you.  He laid you both gently on the cold floor and caressed your side as the two of you did your best to catch your breath.  “You know you really shouldn’t come here, Y/n, it’s best if you just wait for me when I go home.”

“I don’t get the same reaction out of you when we do it at home,” you blushed.

“Get dressed, I’ll leave early so we can go spend the night together,” he smiled as he sat up.“Yes, Father,” you grinned cheekily.

[mediocre-daydreams]

𝐟𝐨𝐮𝐫.       𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐚 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐰 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐢𝐭 𝐛𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐝

remus lupin x animagus!reader

𝚜𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚜 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝: 𝚠𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚝𝚛𝚊𝚢, 𝚒 𝚏𝚘𝚕𝚕𝚘𝚠

summary: you and the marauders become animagi for the first time and you manage to (not-so-subtly) crush on remus even while he’s a werewolf.

w/c: 5k

･ﾟ⋆☾*･ﾟ.・。.*゜✭・･ﾟ✫・⋆。.

life was a willow and it bent right to your wind head on the pillow, i could feel you sneaking in

you hadn’t spoken to remus since last week. it wasn’t like the months before, where you’d slowly but unintentionally distanced yourself from him in favor of the animagus potions; no, this time, it was he who took to avoiding you. the day after your argument, he caved into sparing you a few brief glances. but since then, he’d successfully managed to shut you out in every class, at every meal, and disappear from the library and common room.

it was torture.

“what’s the incantation again?” sirius mumbled to himself as he flipped through the pages of the book that had begun to eat away at you each time you saw it. the guilt had nothing to do with the fact that you’d stolen an official ministry document from the restricted section or that you were using it to do something very dangerous and illegal, but because it reminded you that you’d sacrified your relationship with remus by choosing to become an animagus.

sure, you were becoming an animagus for him. but it still took all your self restraint not to spit out the damn mandrake leaf every time you saw the devastation and betrayal crack through his straight-faced exterior. in the past three years you’d known remus, you’d never once fought like this. you didn’t fight, period. there were squabbles over the best muggle literature and who got the last copy of a library book and whether tea or coffee was the most complimentary for a reading session, but none of those lasted more than a few hours or a day at most.

so yes, you’d rather have a girl’s night with bellatrix lestrange than this—whatever it was.

“ah! amato animo… a tomato? atonement… animagus- huh?” james squinted at the instructional pages; the parchment was limp from the sustained humidity of the dungeons and the ink had slightly bled, so you couldn’t blame james.

oh, you could, actually. “merlin, james. gimme those-” you grabbed his glasses from his face and wiped the grime and condensation off with the sleeve of your robe. “there, better?”

james’ eyes buggled in astonishment. “loads! woah, i feel like i’ve gotten a whole new prescription!”

you grimaced. “y’might as well have… do you not clean your glasses, james?”

james shook his head and his curls bounced along. “no, why would i?”

you looked back at the parchment.

peter elbowed james harshly. “listen up, mate. it’s amato animo animato animagus, ‘right?” peter rubbed his forehead with the back of his hand. “not any of that… tomato rubbish.”

“i figure we ‘ought to head up; i think the ceiling’s already beginning to leak.” sirius shuffled his belongings together and tucked them under his arm. “up and at ‘em, lads! and… lass.”

you waved him off. “nah, i figure i count as one of the lads now. i’ve seen all of you half naked, ‘cept for james, who was full naked. we’re forever now.”

your group ascended the stairs, footsteps and voices echoing off the stone walls. peter laughed heartily. “i think you’re right. you ‘oughtta be a full marauder, at this point.”

james nodded. “yeah, and you even know about moony’s furry little secret! plus, we’re breaking so many laws right now and become ani-”

sirius slapped the back of james’ head as you slammed your hand over james’ mouth. james cried out, the sound muffled by your palm.

“what was that for?” james sputtered, genuinely in pain.

“you are the worst at keeping secrets, james potter. remind me to never make you my secret keeper,” you groaned.

“hey, i’m not that bad!” peter snorted. “i’d rather have sirius as my secret keeper than james.”

you all looked at the boy thoughtfully. james nodded and shook his finger at peter. “let’s be honest, the only person we should trust with secret-keeping is peter. or moony, but he’s not here at the moment.”

“shush, we’re here!” sirius pointed his head at a large window facing the hogwarts grounds. from there, you could see the lightning storm tearing violently at the branches of the whomping willow.

“well, you all know what t’do.” james sat on the ground matter-of-factly and pressed the tip of his wand over his heart. “amato animo animato animagus… hello? get to it!”

you all followed suit, though peter was chewing his lip nervously. “is this gonna work? i mean, we only had one sunset between finishing the potion and the electricity storm so we never did a sunrise incantation… will that be enough? plus, we started the spell during the storm, so will that-”

“shut it, would’ya?” sirius grumbled. “we’ve got- holy shit!” sirius gasped. “i- i feel the second heartbeat!”

your eyes widened. “godric, we’re really doing this, aren’t we?”

james nodded numbly. “we’re in deep shit.”

--

“ready?” you asked, clutching the crystal phial that had once held your mandrake leaf and the moth chrysalis. it was now a thin blood red potion, enough for one mouthful.

“y-yeah,” sirius whispered, knuckles white as he gripped the fabric of his robes.

“i still think it’s a bad idea to do this in our dorm,” peter fretted, always the cautious one. “what if someone walks in?”

“that’s why we’ve locked the door, duh.”

“-or what if one of our animagus forms is a-an elephant, and we break everything?”

“that’s a problem for later-”

“or what if it doesn’t work and we get stuck in a horrible half-transformation forever?”

james grinned. “well, that’d certainly suck, wouldn’t it?” he uncorked his bottle and held it up in the air. “cheers, lads!” with one gulp, he’d swallowed the potion with confidence. nothing happened.

you and sirius looked at each other, eyebrows raised. taking a deep breath, you followed suit, downing the potion all at once. similarly, there was no change.

“oh! we have to do the incantation again…” you flipped through the book, skimming for any missed instructions. you grimaced. “ah, the book reads: you must show no fear. it is too late now, to escape the change you have willed.”

“on that cheery note,” james announced, pointing his wand to his chest once more, “amato animo animato animagus!”

at once, james let out a strained groan. “fuck, that’s killer!” he clutched his side.

you figured it was best to finish this quickly. “amato animo animato animagus,” you mumbled, bracing yourself for the incoming pain.

you now understood why so few people decided to become animagi. the gruelling preparation process aside, this was the worst pain you’d ever felt (and that you’d ever feel, you thought).

“does anyone else feel like they’re being barbequed alive or is that just me?” peter gasped.

“barbequed? you’re too white to have any barbeque seasoning… ah!”

“this is no time for joking!”

“it’s always time for-” james was abruptly cut off.

“what in godric’s name-” sirius sobbed through his pain, marveling at the stag that had taken james’ place.

of course james was the first to transform. he was always a bit of an overacheiver.

“ohh, i’m really feeling that double heartbeat now,” you panted, curled into the fetal position. james looked like he wanted to move over to you, but he knew better. peter was right—what if someone’s animagus was an elephant? james didn’t want to be in the way for that transformation.

“oh my go-”

when had the world become so small? everything had changed color… this was it. you were in so much pain that you were beginning to hallucinate; the next stage would be unconsciousness.

no, that wasn’t right. your nose twitched. why was your nose twitching? you couldn’t control it. god, the dorm smelled horrible. looking at your feet—well, they were no longer feet—you were confronted with the truth: your animagus was a rabbit.

a damn rabbit? you thought. why couldn’t i be something cool, like a bear? or a gryffindor lion? well, i suppose that wouldn’t be very inconspicuous… the marauders are going to tease me relentlessly for this…

you hopped—hopped!—towards your new and alarmingly large friends. sirius was a large black dog with long, coarse hair. he licked you eagerly, covering you in drool, and you wished that you were something larger so that you could bit him in retaliation. you felt humiliated as you leaned onto your haunches and cleaned your face in the way rabbits did—yes, the marauders weren’t ever going to let you live this down.

james the stag waved his head up and down like he was laughing. oh, how you wished you were a human so you could slap him. you’d have to settle for some angry foot stomping.

and peter… poor peter was a rat. a cruel part of you was delighted in peter’s unfortunate animagus form. it would take the ruthless commentary off of you.

but just like that, your fun was cut short. the doorknob was rattling aggressively, the noise only enhanced by your new senses. it seemed that sirius’ senses had also improved, as he seemed to panic as he sniffed the air. he growled lowly, slinking backwards until he was beside a bed and out of view from the doorway.

your ears swivelled and you caught a quiet voice. “alohamora.” it was then that you discovered a benefit to your animagus form: skittishness. your reflexes seemed to take over as you scurried ungracefully beneath the same bed that sirius was taking refuge behind. you couldn’t see much.

there was a bark. sirius’ bark. and then a loud clanging. and then a slam, followed by hesitantly approaching footsteps and a string of expletives.

it was remus.

“what. the. fuck.”

we can explain! you wanted to say, but another thing you discovered was that you couldn’t speak—not just in terms of human words, but you couldn’t bark like sirius or squeak like peter. so you thumped.

“did- did sirius put you in here? james? peter?” remus appeared to be going insane. “what was that? that noise?” he bent down to inspect the thump from beneath the bed and caught sight of a bunny rabbit, its bright eyes glowing back at him. his breath hitched in his throat.

“whaaaa- oh shit. there’s four of you. oh shiiiit.” remus pulled his head from under the bed and you wriggled towards him, following curiously. remus stepped backwards, appalled, pulling at his unruly hair which he’d stopped taking care of at the same time he’d stopped talking to you.

he rubbed his eyes. “no,” he whispered. “no, no, no.” remus turned around, left the room, and slammed the door behind him. you looked at peter, who was even smaller than you were, who squeaked a few times in response. james and sirius had yet to make much nose, which was smart—they didn’t want to draw attention from any other gryffindors.

the door flew open and remus entered once more, pointing a shaky, accusatory finger at the four of you. “i swear to merlin, i’ll kill you if you’re what i think you are. who i think you are,” he hissed.

your nose twitched aggressively as you shut your eyes, trying your best to transform back so you could defend yourself. you fell to your stomach, banging your cheek on the floor, as you returned to your human form. you thanked whoever created the rules of magic for allowing animagus transformers to keep their clothing.

“rem, please don’t-” you huffed, picking yourself up and rubbing your head. remus scrambled towards you, crouching down and pulling you into his arms wordlessly. caught off guard, you let yourself fall into his embrace, finding yourself surrounded by the scent that you’d missed for months. you buried your nose deeper into the crook of his neck. perhaps you were imagining it, but it seemed that you could smell more clearly even in human form.

remus stood, dragging you with him, and you stood in his arms limply, exhausted from the effort and extraneousness of the transformation. you wrapped your arms around his body, as he did yours, and closed your eyes. it was easy to pretend that three teenage boys were not currently in this room as illegally tranformed animagi while you were in the arms of your best friend, a werewolf, who you were madly in love with.

(the last part was a lie. you were very much aware that you were standing in remus’ arms.)

when james, sirius, and peter all became human once more, remus put his hands on your shoulders and walked you backwards so you could join the other marauders in their guilty little huddle.

“what have you done?” remus whispered, horrified.

you raised your hands in the air and shook them. “ta-da!”

it was very silent. to be fair, there wasn’t any precedent for “things to say after you went behind your best friend’s back and committed an extremely dangerous and illegal act in order to help him through a monthly werewolf transformation which is also dangerous and also most likely breaks many, many regulations.”

then sirius said. “in our defense-”

he only spurred on a panicked frenzy from remus. “merlin, how long- how did you- this is dangerous! and illegal! and- why would you- damn it, does this have something to do with me being a w- with my condition?” he hissed furiously.

“no! well… yes,” peter admitted bashfully.

“i’m sorry! we were trying to help. we thought that being around animals could distract the werewolf from hurting itself, and we’d be safe since we’re not human,” james hurriedly explained. “and we were careful and hey, it all turned out okay, right? no weird human-animal horror hybrids!”

remus paced, gnawing anxiously on one of his knuckles.

“rem, we didn’t mean to-”

“and you told her!” he snarled, pushing you aside and going straight for james. there was no logical sense to it—james wasn’t the only one who told you about the plan. “you fucking told her! i asked for one thing-”

“technically it was like, three things-”

“and you- damn it!” remus gasped for breath, dragging his hands down his face.

“‘tell her?’ tell who, me?” you interjected. “the fuck were you thinking; keeping secrets from me? i’m the one who bloody found this out in the first place! why are you talking about me behind my back?” you scoffed. “what, do you think i’m not man enough to handle whatever it was that you talked about?”

remus grabbed your shoulders once more, shaking you slightly. “i don’t want you involved in this! i don’t want you here!” he looked distressed. “that’s not what- no, i don’t want you to put yourself in danger because i knew my idiot friends were going to try something! i care about you too much to- merlin, you shouldn’t have.” then he ripped his hands from you like he’d burned himself.

“you don’t care about us?” sirius pouted, trying to lighten the mood.

“how did you even pull this off?” remus sat on his bed, defeated. “i mean, when did you even have time for this? how’d you even know how to?”

you pursed your lips to hide your smug smile. “i raided the restricted section,”

“you mean we-”

“and the potions closet, and got access to the dungeons…”

peter chimed in excitedly. “and i stole- got the phials, and the moth chrysali—don’t even ask—by the way, and sirius… held the map, and james… was our team leader. isn’t that right, james?”

james nodded.

remus buried his face in his pillow, trying to remain quiet as tears stubbornly forced themselves out of his eyes. he hated his friends. he hated their recklessness and stupidity and outrageousness. but most of all, he hated that he loved them.

“we only did it for you, moony.” james looked over at remus sadly, trying to gague his state.

remus hiccuped. “i’m a monster. i just- i don’t understand why you’d-”

you rushed to remus’ side, perching yourself on the edge of his mattress and laying a hand on his head, stroking his hair. “i’d- we’d do anything. anything for our moony.”

--

you were back by that window, the one where you and the marauders and uttered the animagus incantation. there was no storm this time, and the branches of the whomping willow almost seemed relaxed as they drooped loosely, allowing themselves to sway with the wind. there was an odd semblance of peace.

you jumped slightly as remus placed a hand on your shoulder. caught up in your thoughts, you hadn’t heard him arrive.

“sorry,” he muttered. he looked out the window with you.

hit by a stroke of bravery, you brought your hand up to cover his, coaxing it off your shoulder. you let his hand fall to his side, where you tangled his fingers in yours. it was nice, albeit a little uncomfortable. his hands were much larger than your and your fingers didn’t quite fit together.

“the full moon’s tonight.” you sighed heavily. “shouldn’t you be resting?”

“i’m alright. i’m used to it.”

“you shouldn’t be. you shouldn’t have to get used to- all of this. i wish you didn’t have to- to suffer.”

remus smiled sadly, turning to look at you. “i wish that too.”

you looked down at the ground. “me and the boys are going to come with you tonight,” you stated. there was no room for questioning.

“what?”

you lowered you voice. “after pomfrey brings you down to the shack, we’re going to sneak out and meet you there. we’ll be in our animagus form before you transform. that way, you don’t have to be alone.”

“have you lost it?” remus laughed incredulously. his hand broke free from your so he could cup your cheeks softly. “no, you’re not.”

“we’re not, or i’m not?” you murmured. “i know you think differently of me. but i don’t want you to. i’m not- not weak, or naive, or helpless, remus. i’m just as good as the other marauders.”

“no, i don’t think that of you. quite frankly, i think you’re stronger and cleverer and better than all of them combined. i just don’t want- i couldn’t handle it if you got hurt. especially if it was because of me. i-”

“moony, you would never hurt me. i know you wouldn’t; there’s no hesitance in my heart. and i’m a rabbit,”

“yes, you’re a rabbit, do you not see how-”

“i’m a rabbit, which means i’m fast. i can get away if i really need to—which i won’t, because you’re not going to hurt me.”

“how do you know that? how can you be sure?”

“let’s say i’ve done my research. i did check out that book, remember?”

--

“don’t come near me with your damn prongs!” sirius laughed, pushing james’ head away as he pretended to butt into sirius’ chest with the crown of his head. the four of you had yet to transform, still reviewing the logistics in the boys’ dorm.

“prongs! i like that.” you declared. “i think we all need code names. moony has one. james can be prongs.”

“hey, that’s not nearly as cool as moony!”

sirius snorted. “peter should be wormtail. the first thing i saw when he was transformed was his tail, and i really thought his animagus was going to be a worm!”

it was peter’s turn to be outraged. “are you serious? that’s so-”

“‘course i’m sirius! i’m always sirius.”

“if we’re going by first impressions, i say sirius should be padfoot. i’m being ser- i’m not kidding, have you seen his paws? they’re like pillows; mine are perfectly normal, thank you,” you sniffed.

“alright, and what’ll you be?” 

james gestured at you from head to toe. “hopper.” he declared.

“i’ll take it! y’know what, i’ll take it.”

“‘right then, folks! we better get going. have you got the map?” james dug through a heap of junk.

“we finished it?” peter questioned.

“yeah, hopper helped with the dungeons area. we just gotta seal it later.”

“wait a minute, how come you get to be hopper and i’m wormtail?”

sirius held up the parchment triumphantly. “found it! i also found dog treats. who got dog treats?”

“that would be me,” you snickered, finding yourself very funny. “the house elves helped.”

you’d only figured out the travel strategy yesterday, and in hindsight, you should’ve practiced. the invisibility cloak was draped over james’ antlers with peter in between each one, and sirius stood by james’ side while you balanced for dear life on sirius’ back. it was much more difficult for you to cling on than it was for peter. you’d tried being down on the ground, walking alongside sirius and james, but you had gotten too close to being stepped on for your comfort.

peter had wanted to travel as humans and transform outside, which you vehemently opposed. it was safer to become animals in the privacy of a dorm room rather than on open grounds. you thought it was a bit unfair that peter, who had an easier time being on james’ back than you on sirius’, was so adamant about “convenience.”

it was a clear evening. you’d always enjoyed astronomy, but since discovering remus’ condition, looking at the moon had only brought dread upon you. you figured it must be a lot worse for remus.

you’d found that, in animal form, there was some primitive way you could communicate. you found it secretly preferable to normal communication with the marauders. there was no nuance or room for jokes, only barks with general meanings and vague symboling. it was effective, timewise.

“hurry up!” prongs nudged his head forward, almost sending wormtail flying.

“merlin, we’re trying!” padfoot whined. “i’m carrying a bloody rabbit on my back, so would you give it a sec?”

you pawed at sirius’ head. “i’m not that much of a burden! do you know how hard you’re making this for me? i’m on the verge of slipping off at every turn!”

“would you all shut it? i’ve gotta get past the whomping willow,” wormtail squeaked. he scurried to the base of the willow with the nimbleness that only a rat could process and pressed his tiny hand to a special spot on the bark. its defensive branches went limp, and the three of you pushed forward.

you jumped from padfoot’s back, scrambling to land properly. your rabbit body abilities weren’t very natural to you.

“moony!” padfoot barked. there was a flicker of recognition in remus’ eyes, though for the most part, they were clouded in discomfort. the four of you shifted back to your human forms, hoping to comfort remus before his full moon transformation.

“remus?” you whispered, so quietly that it oculd be mistaken for a breath. you crept towards him, who was curled into himself in a corner of the room. “remus, it’s going to be okay. we’re here!” you tried to lift his spirits.

remus shook his head. “i’m scared,” he confessed shakily. “if anything happens to you…”

“we’ll be alright, moony.” peter smiled reassuringly. the wonderful thing about peter was his ability to empathize with everyone. he had a way of calming his friends down during their lowest moments. “and if anything goes wrong, we know to leave immediately,” peter promised.

remus nodded, eyeing the ground warily. “you should probably turn again. it’ll be anytime now.”

within moments, remus was surrounded by four animals once more. you still weren’t used to being so small as a rabbit. you nuzzled against remus’ thigh, rubbing the side of your face against the fabric of his pants affectionately. remus smiled sadly, using two fingers to scratch behind your ears. you cooed.

there was a sudden snapping and remus inhaled sharply. he was beginning to transform. you backed away quickly, as did the other marauders, and watched as remus began the painful process of becoming a werewolf. you didn’t bother looking—it felt voyeuristic; wrong. there was nothing you could do to cover the sound of remus’ bones breaking, his well-worn clothing ripping and tearing, and the cries of pain that already began to sound like howls.

you wished you could cry yourself. unfortunately, the best you could do was stomp your feet and grind your teeth (which you did, violently).

for all that remus described himself to be as a werewolf, you found him startlingly beautiful. before you was a wolf, larger and slightly lankier than normal, that was distinctly remus. he had the same opalescent green eyes, the same mysterious and confident composure, and the same quiet curiosity. this was not a monster or a creature meant to kill. this was remus lupin at his most vulnerable.

padfoot whined lowly. “moony, y’alright?”

moony seemed startled; not threatened, but rather emotional. “i’m alright.”

“hell yeah!” prongs waved his head around excitedly, forcing padfoot to skirt out of the way to avoid his wild antlers. “this is so cool!”

“speak for yourself,” wormtail squeaked. “i’m still motion sick. moony, do y’know how we got here? i rode on prongs’ bloody head, like ratatouille!”

“what’s a ratatouille?” prongs and padfoot were equally puzzled.

you and wormtail shared a look that only non-pureblooded folk could understand. “don’t even worry about it. that movie won’t be released until nearly three decades later, and you’ll all be well and dead by then. let’s just move on.”

“can i come closer, moony?” you tilted your head, one ear sticking up quizzically. moony huffed in affirmation.

“it’s me! can you tell?”

“i can.” moony seemed amused. “you’re just as annoying as a rabbit as you are a human.”

you thumped in displeasure. “you git. i didn’t carry a mandrake leaf in my mouth just for you to insult me.”

prongs grunted. “you are quite funny, hopper. have you seen her binky yet? it’s so embarrassing.”

you thumped a few times more. “yeah? says the one with the death contraption on his head! plus, all you can do is grunt like a caveman. i didn’t realize it was possible for you to get any dumber.”

padfoot barked madly. “merlin, i love this. i’m the only one who can make actual sounds.”

wormtail scratched the floor angrily. “don’t rub it in, padfoot. or i’ll bit you and give you rabies.”

“i don’t think that’s how it works,” prongs corrected.

“it’s nice to see that you’re all just as insufferable as animals,” moony snorted, beginning to pace restlessly around the shack. “it’s too cramped in here. i feel like i’m suffocating.”

“couldn’t be me,” wormtail gloated. “perks of being a rat, i s’pose.”

“oh, shut it wormy. i’ll have padfoot eat you.” you threatened.

padfoot cringed. “absolutely not!”

“what, so you don’t think i’m tasty? i’m offended by that, you know.”

“hey, do you want to be eaten? ‘cause i-”

“can you all shut it?” prongs hooved the wooden flooring with a loud scrape. “you’re stressing moony out.”

prongs was right—moony was beginning to scratch at himself again, only able to entertain himself with your animal antics for so long. you leaped towards him frantically, and moony froze. he brought his face down to yours very slowly, like he was scared to hurt you. you could feel his warm, damp exhales puff through his nose and onto your face. there was fear in moony’s eyes as he examined you, so fragile in comparison to his powerful, muscular build.

“don’t be so egotistical, moony,” you scoffed. you found that reverse psychology type tough love was the only thing that would get through to remus when he thought he didn’t deserve kind words. “you’re not special. hell, i’m loads better than you. watch this.” you spun in circles as you became a blur in front of moony’s eyes.

moony vocalized what sounded like a laugh. “c’mere,” he probed, inviting somebody else closer for the first time. “let me see you.”

“i’m quite pretty, aren’t i?” you bragged. “very cute, if i say so myself.”

“precious,” moony agreed. “you’re my little treasure.”

you wanted to kiss him right then and there. you were his treasure. you discovered another downside to your animagus form: you had no lips to kiss with. you settled for a lick.

“did you just… lick me?” moony teased, lifting the paw you’d licked curiously.

“so what if i did?” you countered, thumping, thumping, thumping as you’d learned was the best way to communicate your annoyance. the boys were annoying you a lot today.

“merlin, we should call you thumper instead.” wormtail chirped.

“hey, i want a kiss!” padfoot ran over, tongue lolling, and covered you in slobber as he repeated his minstrations from the first transformation. he did the same to moony, who pushed him off seconds later.

“i’m disgusting!” you whined, rubbing yourself against moony’s legs. “ew, you’re so gross, pads!”

“hey, where did those names come from anyway?” moony allowed himself to lay on the ground so you’d be able to wipe yourself off on him better.

prongs trotted over, careful not to impale anything. “you got a cool name, so we wanted ones for ourselves. d’you like ‘em?”

moony dipped his head in approval. “very fitting. though i think i prefer love over thumper, though,” he cooed.

you preened. “i love you too, moony.” as if on instinct, you stood on your hind legs and lifted yourself to the underside of moony’s head, where you rubbed your chin on the fur there. 

wormtail, padfoot, and prongs gave each other indecipherable looks. wormtail spoke first. “did you- did you just scent him?”

“what does that even mean?” you denied.

“yeah, we’re just affectionate, s’all.” moony added.

“good godric, i’m tired. is anybody else tired?” you whined, stretching your body until you were very flat and long. 

moony nudged you with his nose affectionately. “go to sleep, little one. the others will wake you up when it’s time to go.”

so you closed your eyes, curled up against the warmth of moony’s chest, feeling his heart beat steadily against your body—the body you’d sacrificed months of time for in order to be here with him.

･ﾟ⋆☾*･ﾟ.・。.*゜✭・･ﾟ✫・⋆。.

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[finnsstyles]

warm

remus lupin x fem!reader

summary: the story of remus and fem!reader: the start of their friendship, moments in their friendship, and the start of something more.

tw: mentions of attempted sexual assault

y/n y/l/n was a quiet being. that was a well-known fact. she was the type of girl that isn’t “super model” pretty, but was in a natural kind of way. she didn’t have crazy big eyes and with full eyebrows with a button nose with full lips. she was natural. remus liked that. 

she is extremely wise for someone her age. remus liked that, too. remus never really looked at her in any way other than as the girl he is paired with in potions… until one night: 

it was a stormy night as the four boys walked to the shrieking shack. it was one of those nights for poor remus and they were not hyped up for it. rainy nights were always the worst. 

 a few hours later the four limped into the infirmary and called out for madam pomfrey. remus hushed them as he gestured to the sleeping figure on a few beds over. it was y/n y/l/n. they had heard about the fight that she had gotten into. 

i wonder what happened to make her snap, remus pondered. she’s normally so calm and indifferent. what could he have done? remus didn’t get the chance to analyze the girl because madam pomfrey had come out to help. 

ϟ     ϟ     ϟ     ϟ     ϟ

it was about noon when remus awoke and it was because of sirius and james arguing over who should sneak into kitchen for food. it seems as though they’re arguing didn’t only wake him, 

“can both of you just go to the kitchen or play a game of rock, paper, scissors because y’all are loud as fuck and i’m nursing a cracked skull,” a low voice snarked. their heads whipped in the direction of the voice to see the smaller girl slowly trying to sit up. she had a purple cheek, split lip, and cast on her left arm. 

“well, well, well, i see the ravenclaw did you in, huh?” sirius jested. “maybe you shouldn’t fight 6-foot boys when you are half his size.” 

she rolled her eyes and sarcastically chuckled, “he had it coming. he was a douchebag and he should be glad that one of the prewitts found me before i stomped on his stupid face.” she curiously ran her eyes over the four of them, “if you’re so great, then why do the four of you look so black and blue, huh?” 

the four boys stiffened and glanced at one another. sirius opened his mouth just as she started, “don’t worry, i won’t tell anyone that remus is a werewolf. i’m a bitch, but that kind of bitch.” their mouths bobbed open and closed in shock. “listen, i know that i’m not the smartest person in the world, but i am pretty observant. i notice things and i noticed that y’all always disappear at the same time every month and remus comes back with a new scar or a limp. no one else knows. just me.” 

remus gulped, “listen, y/n–” 

“no, you listen, remus. i don’t care what you are. whether you are pureblood, half-blood, or no blood. i don’t care what race or sexuality you are and i certainly do not care if you’re a werewolf. that doesn’t change who you are as a person, ‘kay? so, relax,” she gave him a soft look. “my parents are the kind of people who care about that, but i don’t. don’t group me in with those assholes, ‘kay? that’s the fastest way to make an enemy outta me. and y’all can see what happens to people who anger me.” 

she gestures to the lump of person in the corner of the room. it’s the ravenclaw she fought. there are few spots on him that aren't covered by a bandage and if you can see it, its purple. 

remus just gave her a firm nod and watery smile. 

ϟ     ϟ     ϟ     ϟ     ϟ

that kind of changed all four boys’ perspectives on her, but especially remus's. remus had never really thought of her much before because she always seemed so unattainable. she was one of those people that are only ever themselves when they are around specific people so it’s hard to talk to them and it’s intimidating when you get the chance to. 

it was a late thursday night and remus was serving detention for a prank in slughorn’s room when y/n walked in. she still had a bruised cheek and cast on. 

“what did you do?” remus asked. 

“beat the shit out of a ravenclaw, remember? apparently, you still have to serve detention even if he’s the one who tried to pull down your skirt in a hallway at nine o’clock at night without asking first,” she rolled her eyes as she scrubbed the cauldron aggressively. “it’s not like anyone but mcgonagall believed me, anyway. who would believe the girl in a pile on the floor bleeding with her shirt ripped over a ravenclaw prefect? ‘pparently no one.” 

remus screwed his eyes shut when he realized what had happened, merlin, that’s awful. 

she continued to struggle to scrub the cauldron, “how the fuck am i supposed to clean this with one hand? how is that fair? i can’t even carry one of these when i don’t have a broken arm.” she looked up at remus with watery eyes and a trembling lip. 

remus reached a warm palm out to grasp her non-casted arm and pulled the cauldron out from under the other arm. he crouched slightly so he was eye level with her. 

“okay, love, it’s okay,” the weight of his warm palm was comforting on her back. “ ’m sorry he did that to you and i am even more sorry that no one believed you. i think it’s amazing that you stood up for yourself like that; you’re so strong, but it’s okay to be upset about it, yeah? don’t force yourself to be okay.” he soothed a hand over the front of her head, pushing the strays out of her face. her body shook harder.

“doesn’t that feel better, lovie? to let it all outta ya’ chest like that? a good cry will solve anything, hm? wanna come here?’ he offered her the chance to close the space; he gave her the option. she hesitated and glanced him over. then she hopped down from her stool and shuffled forward into the space between his left arm and side. her right hand clutching the back of his shirt and she cradled her casted hand to her chest and tucked her face into the space between his shoulder and chest. 

ϟ     ϟ     ϟ     ϟ     ϟ

that night changed y/n’s behavior more than her perspective. she had always had a softer spot for remus than she did the rest of the boys. he was just so nice. he always gave her that crooked smile that was so warm; she couldn’t resist. 

the following morning, y/n was having a slight panic session over what to say to remus over the whole thing but she just decided to be calm. be calm, it’s just remus. he’s like the nicest person ever, he won’t judge you. besides, even if he does, you know his secret so a little black mail never hurt anyone. she rationalized. she knew this was a harsh way of thinking but this was how she was raised and it was ingrained in her. 

y/n bumped into remus as she was walking, like literally bumped into his shoulder. she turned around to give the person who bumped her a glare, but immediately paused when she noticed who it was. 

“oh, hey, remus. umm–” she harshly tucked her hair behind her pierced ears. he steadied her with warm hands and she peeked up at him through thick lashes and brows, “i–um– are we cool? ‘cause last night was a lot and– you’re shaking your head at me. are we not cool?” she took a step back, out of his hands, “did i make you uncomfortable? i promise i didn't mean to.” 

remus took a step forward and grasped her biceps and tilted his head down to meet her eyes once again. “y/n, breathe, love. everything is fine. the only thing i am worried about is the fact that you have not once taken a deep breath this whole conversation. relax fo’ me, yeah?” he soothed over her biceps. “good, good. back to what you were saying, nothing has changed, hun. i don’t look at you any different than i did before. everything is fine and i hope that i didn’t make you uncomfortable.” 

he gave her a charming smile and she shook her head and “no, you didn’t” quietly. “good, did you eat? c’mon, we can eat together. need some fuel in the pretty belly of your’s.” he turned her around and lead her to the hall with a palm on her back. he was just so warm. 

ϟ     ϟ     ϟ     ϟ     ϟ

a few months had passed and remus and y/n had formed a nice friendship. they hung out a lot; him doing homework and her doing whatever she decided to do that day: reading, writing, homework, sleeping. she slept a lot. no one really knew where this friendship came from, but it was adored.

y/n had pondered the idea of being something more and so had remus. remus really liked the idea, and so did y/n but she hesitated after talking with marlene:

“what do you and lupin even talk about, y/n?” marlene demanded. “you guys are nothing alike. he’s so nice and outgoing and you’re… well, you’re not. usually people go for people that are similar to them, so how does that even work?”

those sentences rang through her head every hour, like church bells telling her the time of day. she felt herself distancing from remus. she didn’t know what to do. y/n hadn’t realized how much she liked remus and hoped for a relationship with him until marlene said that and made her realize how unrealistic she had been. god, i’m so stupid. she chastised. 

she was hiding on the grounds of the school in a small nook by the great lake. it was a chilly day and she was bundled up in her house sweater, leather jacket, jeans and booties with remus’s beanie on. it was much too big for her so she had to keep adjusting it from falling over her eyes. 

“hey, you,” remus called out to her. he had been looking for her for over an hour. she hadn’t been at lunch. “what’re ‘ya doin’? its freezin’ out ‘here.” he sat down next to her and nudged her shoulder with his.

she looked up at him with a cherry nose, “just thinking. it’s so loud inside. i just wanted it to be quiet for a little.” 

“what’s the matter, bug?” he asked. “you’ve been off for a while now and ’m starting to miss ya’. yer’ my girl and it’s like yer’ gone all’a the sudden. ya’ left me alone out ’ere.” he gently coaxed. 

she suddenly got up on her knees and shifted so she was facing him while sitting on her heels. she picked at her fingertips and bit her lip, “rem, do you think we are too different?” he gave her a confused tilt of his head. “it’s just– you’re so warm and great and smiley and talkative. so many people love you and everyone knows your name and you’re so smart. then, here i am and i’m not warm and not great and not smiley. i never talk and when i do, no one ever hears me. people are scared of me more than they like me. do you think we are too different to ever be anything?” 

“well what do you want us to be?” he prompted. he knew what she was hinting at but he didn’t want to assume. she gave a pouty shrug of her shoulders. he heaved a sigh. “it hurts my feelings tha’ you think so little of yourself, baby. yer’ my favorite girl, my best girl. i don’t think it’s fair that ya’ hold me to such a high standard and then speak about yer’self like this.” 

he tilted his head down to look at her, “what made you think about this so abruptly? you were fine a few days ago.” 

“marlene said something about how we are too different and how she doesn’t get how we are so close because we are nothing alike. and i guess it just made me feel like the insecurities i was feeling are real and not just in my head,” she mumbled. she was embarrassed.

“love, look at me. i love ya’ for who you are. yer’ my best friend and i wouldn’t trade ya for anything in the whole world. and we can be anything that ya’ want us to be, okay? ya just gotta tell me what ya want,” he reached out and fixed the beanie from hiding her face. he tugged the sides down to better fit her head. god, she’s adorable. i love her so fucking much.

“can–,” she started then stopped. he encouraged her with a nudge of his head, “can we maybe be more than friends?”

he grinned, “but we are already best friends, what more can we be?” he teased. her pink cheeks turned cherry red to match her nose. she huffed and pouted. “‘m just kidding, love.” he leaned in to give her forehead a kiss, but she tilted her chin up and placed a soft kiss on his lips. her ice-cold nose touched his cheek and he inhaled sharply. she pulled back and lookup at him nervously. he reached out and pulled her into him, her legs were sprawled next to him with her lower back leaning on the outside of his right thigh. her upper body was curled into his lap with one hand cradling her back and the other on her head. 

“let’s try that again, huh?” he grinned and leaned in to place a kiss to her lips. 

he makes me warm, she thought. 

[gryffindors-weasley]

Starlit Confession

Young!Sirius Black x Reader

Summary: On a camping trip tradition, your friends have got other plans neither you or Sirius are aware of.

Requested by @expelliarmusmyass : “can i request a classic enemies to lovers "there's only one bed" sirius x reader where all the marauders (+lily!) have a sleepover or camping trip of some sorts and lily and remus finally decide they need to get reader and sirius already and plan to get them to sleep in the same room/bed/tent ? thanks !!”

Word Count: 5.4k

Warnings: little bit of jealousy, mutual pining, fluff, kissing

A/N: Thank you for my first Sirius request!! I absolutely loved everything about it, I hope you enjoy!

July 1979

The breeze swept coolly across your face against the warm summer sun as you stuck your hand outside the window, the air gliding over the back of it. You were headed to the stretch of woods that you’ve all come to know so well, something that was highly anticipated the moment the summer season had begun. Camping. It was something you and your friends had made into tradition without much discussion against it for the last three years. Lily had saved up for the very Volkswagen bus you’d been sitting in, knowing for a fact she’d get more use out of it than a simple small car; she knew her four closest friends were in it for the long haul and that was something that would always remain true.

It was mostly a golden yellow color, near orange, its roof white with a matching tire cover on the front of it between two round headlights. It was adorable, it was perfect, and most importantly it was big enough to fit a boisterous group of friends that surely needed the space. It’d already housed jovial memories that would be cherished for years to come.

You’d each packed up a bag or two, tossed them in the back and set off to the ever familiar place the five of you had found to be the perfect spot. A clearing amongst the woods, a place not far from the waters edge. It looked near enchanting when sunbeams filter through old yet thriving trees, as much as it could be for being a place without the very magic you’ve known all your life. It was perhaps your favorite tradition out of all others that had been created, one that you never failed to look forward to. No matter what’s been going on with any of you, traditions were never missed or forgotten. That was one thing that was constant and one thing would never change.

Another thing that had been just the same was the constant need for Sirius Black to get under your skin. You’d known him ever since you both were fourteen years old, and every day since then had been a battle of who’d been more witty and your three best friends had yet to determine who had been the rightful owner of that title. You were always bickering about something or another, always tossing narrowed stares and scrunched noses, grumbling under breaths and eye rolls. Even despite that, James, Remus and Lily especially had been convinced that there were feelings amongst it all. It hadn’t been too terribly hard for them to jump to that conclusion. They had their suspicions with each and every look Sirius had found himself giving you when your attention was fixed elsewhere. At the very same look you’d cast upon him when he wasn’t looking. They were absent minded actions to you both, and that was all the more reason for them to think there was something there.

It drove the tight knit group absolutely mad to see their two dearest friends love each other without even knowing of that very fact—James found himself far too close on multiple occasions to flat out complaining of the sheer obliviousness between you two. To simply tell them how blind the two of you must be. But each and every time he’d nearly done so it was promptly stopped by a stern Lily Evans who was not to be defied. They felt another day of this was simply not an option, too painful to watch a second more.

Even now, as you sat in the back with the raven haired wizard, the seating arrangement proved to make for an interesting trip. There was a flurry of jests and quips to match them; it was inevitable when he’d taken the seat right next to you, Remus on his other side. It’d been something entirely intentional on Lupin’s part, though the bickering was something to be expected.

First it had been over who was taking up too much of whose space, something accompanied by a lighthearted series of shoves and stifled laughter when you looked away in hopes the other wouldn’t see it. Then it had been when he’d changed the radio from your favorite song to his with a simple twitch of his fingers, a back and forth battle of rock and ABBA that nearly broke the radio, one that nearly drove your friends insane.

But now, Sirius had found himself staring as he so often does, at the way you waved your hand with the breeze, the way said breeze sifted through your hair and the way you sang along with James to the very same ABBA song that’d been on repeat for the past fifteen minutes. He’d reckon your voice far better than that of the brunette behind the wheel. He doesn’t know just why he always finds himself settling his attention upon you every moment he gets the chance. Or maybe he does and just refuses to admit the reasons for it. But there was something about you, there was always something about you to be admired. You were utterly enamoring even when you’ve got your brows scrunched over something entirely because of him. They never seem to stay furrowed for long.

“If you take a picture, it just might last longer,” you suggest with a raised brow and a smile indicative of your teasing, effectively pulling him from his thoughts.

“I’m sorry, it’s just you’ve got a bug in your hair,” he counters quickly, the corner of his mouth quirking upwards.

Your eyes are quick to widen slightly as your hand rises to your head in mild panic, combing your fingers through your hair in a hurry. His laughter was a telltale sign of his deception, that ever so familiar frown pulling down your lips as you swat at his shoulder. “Sirius Black, you’re a pain!”

His laughter was immediate as he caught your wrist from swatting him once more, “I’m not lying! There is something in your hair.”

He releases your arm in favor of reaching upwards, the tips of his fingers pinching the delicate flower petal tangled within your hair. Your words fell silent as his fingertips traveled down to the very end of your hair, a gentle action that had your cheeks staining what must have been an obvious pink as you found yourself looking at the smile on his lips. One that was soft and lopsided, one that grew as he held up the small pink petal before tilting his head at you. You hadn’t even realized you’d been holding your breath until that moment, hadn’t realized the new found quiet had drawn everyone’s attention.

“Told you so,” he states confidently, blowing away the petal and leaving it to flutter to your feet.

You squinted at him and mimicked his words to quickly move on from dwelling on your burning cheeks, something that brought a different kind of smile to his face mere seconds before you’d ruffled his own hair in retaliation.

“I meant what I said,” you remind him, trying to fight your grin as you watch tangled strands of black hair fall back against his cheeks once more.

“I am so terribly hurt,” he scoffs, placing a hand over his heart in a display of faux offense.

In that moment you settle for shaking your head, biting the inside of your cheek in a pitiful attempt to conceal your smile. A smile so awfully contagious he found himself mirroring it, having lingered on his lips even when you’d looked away from him in favor of looking out of the window. In doing so, you missed the way James had been glancing at you both in the rear view, at the way he shared a knowing grin with Lily, who’d then done so with Remus. It was a moment missed by you both, how could it not be with the way your thoughts had entirely been about each other unbeknownst to you.

It’d been quiet after that, save for the radio and James’ occasional startling outburst of song should a part come on that he’s fond of. It’d been peaceful and upbeat as Sirius crossed his arms over his chest, trying desperately not to think of how you’d made his stomach twist and flutter with butterflies. It was nothing, that’s what he told himself.

—

The place was just as beautiful and just the same as you’d left it the previous year, the sun still beaming through tall trees and the birds still chirping just as contently as they always do. Upon closer inspection, your initials had been carved in the very same tree, untouched since the five of you had left your mark on it the very first time you found it. Of course, it’d become weathered over time, moss having flourished over the bark, but the engraved letters remain regardless of that very fact.

The fire pit that James and Sirius had made still sat in the center of it all, it’s crumbled stones and charred logs and sticks sitting in a heap within it, waiting to be lit once more. Even the logs circling around it to serve as seats had still sat untouched by anyone else, unmoved from how they were left the previous trip out there.

It was exciting to finally be back there, to finally be out of the car in a place you longed to see again. All was well, except one thing.

“That is absolutely not happening,” you state matter of factly, the twigs snapping beneath your foot as you frown at Lily before narrowing your eyes at Sirius. One look at his smile, just one look, and you return your displeased gaze to the two in question, James making no effort to stifle his laughter at the situation. “No way, that is ridiculous!”

“Lupin must have forgotten to pack a third, Y/n/n,” Lily sympathizes with the softest of frowns to accompany her words, though you hadn’t missed the grin she’d tossed her friend’s way as he scratched the back of his neck and fought his own. “I’m sorry!”

“Then I’ll sleep in the bus with Remus,” you state quickly with a raised brow, crossing your arms over your chest stubbornly as you squint at Sirius’ very obvious grumbling behind you. His reasons for doing it were entirely unknown to you.

“C’mon, Y/n. Pad’s won’t bite,” James chimes in with a laugh, earning a swat to the back of the head from Lily before he protests her actions in return, shrugging his shoulders and rubbing his head. “Not very hard, at least.”

You purse your lips at the brunette and glared, biting the inside of your cheek to hide your smile. A smile that quickly faded as you glanced over your shoulder at the little tent that hadn’t stood very tall on the other side of the fire pit. Your heart leapt and raced within your chest at the thought of being so close, lips tugging downward as you looked back at them with a huff.

“I would say I can’t believe you, but I can,” you groan, brushing past them to get to the lake before they could become aware of your smile.

—

The last traces of sunshine were warm against your skin as you sat along the water’s edge with Lily, taking a moment to yourselves away from the utter chaos that came with the trio in the water. It was still a bit too cold to swim in but that’d never stop them from doing just that. Despite the chill that ran through you from it, everything around you had been exactly how it’s always been.

Wildflowers had bloomed just about everywhere you could imagine amongst patches of green and overgrown grass, framing the lake in varying hues of blues, yellows, purples, and pinks. When you sat at just the right angle, the reflection of the sky over the water had been absolutely wondrous, painting the water orange and pink. The ongoing breeze had been sifting through the leaves in the trees, leaving some to fall to the ground in its wake.

It was absolutely perfect, and you couldn’t think of just anywhere else you’d rather be in that moment than right where you are. You wouldn’t want to be there with anyone else.

“I think this is our best trip yet,” Lily states, leaning back on her palms as she tips her head back, allowing the sun to sweep across her skin.

“I think so too,” you sigh, letting your eyes fall closed as you hear another aguamenti spell used, followed by a bout of laughter that had a smile pulling at your lips at the sound. Her absence in conversation was sure a sign something was on her mind. It always was without fail.

She hadn’t left you to sit and wonder for too long before she spoke up.

“What do you think about Sirius?” There it is.

Your eyes squeeze shut at the question you anticipated, at the one you hadn’t expected her to wait so long in asked you. A soft huff left your lips as you opened your eyes, brows furrowing as she gave you an expectant look.

“Why do you ask?” You say, the corner of your mouth quirking up at her nosiness.

She shrugs her shoulders as she sits up more, heaps of red hair falling to splay against her back. “Just wondering.”

Her smirk was more than obvious as she looked at you, her smile widening. Lily and Remus had kept an eye on you both for quite a while, they knew that something had been there, it wasn’t that hard for them to figure out. Even if you hadn’t been aware of your own foolish love yourself, they’d certainly picked up on it. Because after every witty remark and every scoff and glare, there was always a smile to follow. After every frown and and nose scrunch as one of you stuck their tongue out at the other, there was always a lingering stare just moments after. Anyone could see that, anyone but to two involved that are far too stubborn and argumentative to realize that.

“Well?” She continues.

“Well what?” You ask, pulling your knees to your chest as you look at her.

“You can’t possibly have nothing to say about him, not after all the banter you do. What do you think of him?” She repeats.

You roll your eyes as you avert your gaze from her, resting your chin on your knees as you look ahead. You mull over your words as a laugh leaves your lips, your head shaking slightly as your eyes fall upon him. He’s got strands of wet black hair stuck to his face, cheeks reddened ever so slightly from the combined heat of the summer sun and the chilliness of the water. His smile was beaming and bright as he tips his head back and laughs at something James had said.

“He’s a pain, Lily,” you said, biting the inside of your cheek to hide your smile. “He’s a pain.”

She laughed at your words, though she took note of the smile that’d been on your lips as she followed your gaze to the very one in question. She hadn’t failed to notice the smile he had returned to you after having done a double take, an action that was far less subtle than he’d hoped. He couldn’t help it though. Not with the way you’ve got flowers tucked in your hair and the way the sunshine made you glow. But when he found himself looking for what he felt was far too long he’d stuck his tongue out at you, wiggling his fingers before you rolled your eyes.

“Oh really?” She inquires, her smile evident in her voice, laughing when you narrow your eyes only briefly.

You pluck a flower from the ground and hold it under your nose for a moment, twirling its stem as it sat pinched between your fingers. You shook your head once more.

“Yes, really.”

—

The tent was rather average, having danced dangerously on the edge being too small. Every gust of wind, no matter how gentle, had puffed against its very walls, rattling the zippers and the flap of the door until you’d finally closed it completely. You knew for a fact your friends had to have done this on purpose, at this point there was no way they couldn’t have judged by the smiles they’d done a terrible job at hiding.

It was becoming increasingly obvious when you sat around the campfire that evening when Lily sat with James, and when Remus managed to take up the entirety of the log he’d claimed his own. It left you no other option than to sit next to Sirius, his chin in his palm as he hid his taunting smile behind his fingers.

You could tell by the way their gaze fell upon the two of you more often than not, and by the way James had displayed his emotions a little too obviously each and every time Lily had whispered something undoubtedly about the two of you in his ear. By the very way that no matter how much your group of friends could talk and bounce from topic to topic with ease, the conversation would always, without fail wind up circling back to the two of you. You were becoming painfully aware of the plan made by none other than Lily and Remus.

You should have known they’d do something like this; they’ve done it at the spring ball in sixth year. It was the very first time Hogwarts had done something like that, it was magnificent. However, you thought your date had stood you up as you sat with Lily and Remus, the mysterious date they’d set you up with. Said date had finally showed up by the side of James, and your eyes nearly rolled to the back of your head upon realizing just who they’d set you up with. You’d frowned as you danced with him, accompanied by a few laughs when he twirled you, accompanied by a few eye rolls when he said something witty. The night had been far better than it started, but you hadn’t spoken of it since.

They’d done it at Hogsmeade. They’d told everyone to meet at the Three Broomsticks, having diligently reminded everyone to do so. You and Sirius had been the first ones there, having sat awkwardly across from each other as you sipped your butterbeer. It was quiet until the two of you began to bicker over something too trivial to remember, one smiling when the other wasn’t looking. It took about thirty minutes for you to realize that the rest of the group hadn’t been coming, thirty minutes with Sirius Black.

So yes, you should have known better than to think that they wouldn’t do something like this again.

“Sirius?” His only response is a hum in that moment, a rather dismal one at that. “How do you suppose I’ll get any sleep if you keep huffing and puffing? It’s rather hard to ignore, you know.”

“Maybe that’s the point,” he quips, though you could hear the very smile in his words even without seeing him.

You shake your head at that with a huff of your own, but he could see the shake of your shoulders from your stifled laughter that you had fought so hard to keep at bay. No, he most certainly could not know that he’d been making you laugh, that would be absolutely terrible to your cause for he wouldn’t forget that he’d been able to do something other than make you grumble.

It was quiet for a few moments after that, nothing but the crickets singing just outside the little tent and the whisper of the wind in the trees. He hadn’t huffed anymore after that, and you quickly came to realize that it was in fact not the cause of your restlessness, though a part of you already knew that. You knew as you lay in that tent that you hadn’t hated his company, not in the slightest as much as your protests would beg to differ otherwise on the matter.

“Would you really rather spend the night with him than me right now? Remus?” He asks quietly, curious after a little while, and you didn’t miss the small bit of offense in his tone. It was the most subtle of indicators that he’d been jealous. Not terribly so, but it was enough to have your words stick in his mind for a few lingering moments longer than it should. He found himself to be just a little offended, because while he hadn’t expected this to be the sleeping arrangements, he’d hoped maybe you wouldn’t dread it as much as you seemed to have.

“In this particular moment, yes,” you quip softly, a smile beginning to tug at the corners of your mouth when you hear his displeased huff. “I might even sleep outside with the bears should you continue being jealous.”

“That is not happening,” he says, quick to add more once he realizes just what you’ve said. “And I am not jealous.”

As much as you two may have bickered near incessantly, as much as it may have seemed as though you couldn’t stand each other, he didn’t want you to do such a thing. It was dangerous after all. He knows a flimsy tent would do little to protect you, he knows you’re more than capable with magic, but he’d much rather prefer you weren’t out of his sight. It was safer that way.

“Who’s to say?”

Your back remains to him as you close your eyes briefly, your grin having gone unseen. It’d always been your personal mission to get under his skin ever since he was just a boy who had made it a point to get under yours, and now that he was nearly twenty your goals were no different. Maybe they weren’t as childish and filled with a certain annoyance as they once had been in the very beginning, but the habit was still very much there.

“Y/n/n, could you be serious just once in your life?” He asks.

“You know,” you start, rolling over to lay on your other side. Your breath hitched upon realizing your closeness, his face mere inches from your own and you nearly lose your train of thought as he’d done the same. But you quickly gathered yourself as you swallowed thickly, a smile gracing your lips. “I don’t believe I could if I tried.”

He rolled his eyes as he moved to lay in his back once more, his smile bright as his hair splays across his pillow and you follow suit. Your heart had still been beating wildly in your chest at the closeness you’d shared just seconds earlier, cheeks flushed a soft shade of crimson as you dare not look over at him. He supposed he’s grateful for that because he’s too caught up in looking at you, that same smile on his lips that he knows shouldn’t be there. One look at him and you’d have days, even weeks worth of material to tease him with. But he can’t help it.

He also can’t help it when he laughs, his eyes squeezing shut. “What is it?”

He shakes his head as he continues, your own curious smile forming in your lips as you turn your head and look at him. “I’ve got that bloody ABBA song stuck in my head.”

Your smile widens and a giggle falls past your lips as you return your gaze to the sky, the mingled laughter between the two of you having been something not uncommon as of late. “Well I’ve got that dreaded AC/DC song stuck in mine.”

“It is not dreaded, it’s a classic,” he defends, scoffing lightly as a lingering chuckle accompanies his words.

“And so is mine,” you counter, just as much defense in your voice as he held in his.

“That is absolutely false.”

“It is absolutely not.”

He responded with a heaving sigh, a smile on his lips despite it but he let you win the argument this time because surely there would be more. There would always be more when the two of you were together, but he feels as though he can hardly count on one hand the amount of times you had argued over something serious.

Your shared laughter had since died down to silence amongst everything else, leaving you know choice but to think of how close the two of you were. To think of the fact that never in a million years did you believe you’d ever share a tent with each other. You will admit, only to yourself, that you hadn’t hated it as much as he may have thought. A part of you had found yourself thinking that maybe you’d even miss him had you not been less than a foot away. You thought that a lot lately, unbeknownst to everyone else, or so you thought.

It was then, as you lay beneath the stars in a tent you’d felt was far too small to house two, that you felt his knuckles brush against your own, the very tips of his fingers soon to follow it. The simple touch felt far more electrifying than you had cared to admit to, especially for a simple accident caused from the sheer closeness of your proximity. To be quite honest, you felt rather foolish with the way your heart had skipped a beat and fluttered relentlessly within your chest.

And it was then that you risk a glance to your left the same way he had risked one to his right, eyes meeting in a gaze that’d been shared for the very same reason. You both looked away from the other almost immediately, smiles pulling at your lips as you focus your attention on the sky. No attempts had been made to move.

“Something funny, Y/n/n?” He asks, humor in his tone that only made you smile more than you felt you should have been.

“Yeah,” you start, a soft laugh leaving your lips as your eyes flutter closed. “Are you desperate to hold my hand?”

The laughter he exhaled was immediate at your words, but not out of mocking. “Love, if I wanted to hold your hand I wouldn’t waste my time brushing my fingers over yours.”

That most certainly was a lie, it was absolutely false. As brave as Sirius Black can be, as bold as he always was, he was nervous to hold your hand. He felt as though he was tempting fate already by the mere nudge of his hand over yours. To him, the thought of being in love was both exhilarating and terrifying all the same. To care deeply for someone was in his nature despite his hardships, though he’ll never ever admit it aloud. He didn’t need to.

Sirius could and would risk his life for his friends without a drop of hesitation, he always would. But the idea of slipping his hand in yours, of telling you just how he felt—it was a feat that proved to be difficult. You, you were terrifyingly wonderful and breathtakingly beautiful. You always have a quip to counter his wit, and you would never hesitate to cast a harmless jinx upon him.

He hadn’t realized just how much he wanted to tell you until that very moment, that very day for that matter. With the way you sung that song he swears he dreads every time it plays on the radio. With the way you smiled at him, your cheeks stained a rosy pink when you told him he was a pain. Or the way you’d been beaming as you tucked flowers in your hair with Lily by the lake. He hasn’t known how he made it quite this far without telling you, it was beyond him how he did it.

You weren’t just the girl he’d bicker lightheartedly with on a daily basis over the most trivial of things, always ending in scoffs and eye rolls and narrowed gazes that were more humorous than intended. You weren’t just the one who’d turn his hair every shade of the rainbow given the chance, who could outdo him on the scale of stubborn bravery. You were the girl he found himself following wherever you went, who he found himself thinking of far more often than he told himself he should.

He’s pulled from his thoughts at your soft laughter, turning to lay on his side once more. Before he could ask the reasoning behind it you’d already reached up, your fingers brushing through his hair to grab the lone petal tucked pretty and yellow amongst the strands of black. His gaze never left you, gray and admiring as you tucked his hair behind his ear, the tips of your fingers lingering for just a moment before you pulled them away.

The corner of his mouth quirked up in a smile, his breath fanning warmly over your lips. “Can I kiss you?”

The question was soft yet confident, having had enough of the question merely sitting at the edge of his tongue for days, weeks, months on end. It’d made your heart skip a beat, and you were nearly unsure if you’d heard him correctly. Because Sirius Black, the boy who’d never failed to get under your skin, who never failed to make you roll your eyes or purse your lips, the one you’d seemingly loved all along was asking to kiss you.

The grin on your lips was nothing short of an indication that your words would be that of something jesting. “It depends.”

“Do tell, on what?” He inquires, the glow of the moon illuminating the mischief dancing in your eyes.

You moved to prop yourself up on your elbow, your grin widening a fraction the more you look at him. “Just how long has it been that you’ve wanted to ask me that?”

“Who’s to say I’ve ever given it thought before this very moment?” He counters, though he knows he has a million times. You roll your eyes then, tipping your head back only momentarily before looking at him again.

“Could you be serious just once in your life?” You ask, copying his earlier words.

“I don’t believe I could if I tried.”

You shook your head as your hand settled on his cheek, quieting his further mocking as you pressed your lips on his. His laughter sounded softly against your lips, soon dissolving in favor of finally kissing you, of finally doing just what he’d longed to do for an amount of time he’s far too prideful to admit. He found himself smiling when your hair brushed against his skin, at the feel of your nose nudging his own and your fingertips just barely tangling in his hair.

His hand came up to rest over your own, the action soft and distracted as you parted from him only briefly. Brief enough for you to smile against his lips, for your giddy laughter to puff softly against his skin. Fleeting before he kissed you again—once, twice, three times more.

You pulled away completely then, his hand falling from yours as you swipe the pad of your thumb across the dimple in his chin, your cheeks flushed and his lips kiss swollen and pink. He followed after you for just one more, gray eyes sparkling and smile blissful as you lay back on your side.

“I love you,” he murmurs, “bloody hell I do.”

“Sirius Black,” you say, taking your lip between your teeth as you looked at him. “I love you too.”

With that he tugged your hand gently, pulling you back to his lips in a soft yet lingering kiss, one that made your heart pound and another bout of butterflies to flutter in your stomach as he held your hand to his chest. He’d waited too long to ask you just that, wasted too much time bickering over this, that, and the next thing.

“Our friends will never let us hear the end of this, you know,” he murmurs, forehead resting on yours. “They’ll go on for weeks, love.”

“Let them.”

—

Tags: @vogueweasley @ch0colatefr0gs @anchoeritic @amourtentiaa @hahee154hq @snitches-at-dawn @dracosathenaeum @harrysweasleys @awritingtree @writeroutoftime

[seriouslysnape]

Pleasurable Silence

__

Remus Lupin x Fem. Reader

Warnings: Smut.

Word Count: 2,123

A/N: This was originally a request, but I just realized after I wrote this that this wasn’t what the requester asked for. So this is just a repost.

“Did I stutter? Get on your knees.”

__

“I don’t like the way he looks at you.” Remus snarled, his arms crossed angrily over his chest.

“Remus, you’re being absolutely ridiculous. Sirius is your friend, he has never looked at me that way,” You huffed; “You’re making this up in your head.”

This argument had been going on for far too long now. You had been at each other’s throats for almost an hour. You were tired of fighting, and tired of trying to make Remus see that he was being immature. You and Remus had been at a dinner party of sorts. It was Remus and some of his old friends from his days at Hogwarts. Of course, Sirius Black was included in this group.

“I’ve known Sirius for a long time. I know how he is. I know exactly what he was thinking by the way he was looking at you.” Remus growled, angrily loosening his tie.

Remus had been having a great time, until about halfway through the dinner when he grew quiet. You had noticed that his jaw was clenched the way it did when he was aggravated, and his pupils were dilated about 2x their normal size. You knew something was bugging him, but you decided to leave it be until you were back in private.

That’s when Remus let it all out.

He was pissed about how Sirius had apparently been boggling over you all night. You were sure that Remus was being paranoid, because Sirius had never said or done anything out of pocket in the few years you had known him through Remus. Remus had always been a little insecure, but never like this.

“What’s the matter with you, Remus? You weren’t so nervous before.” You pointed out, removing the pins from your hair.

His tie had been discarded and he ruffled his fingers through his hair to unstyle it. He was fuming.

“I’m not nervous. I just don’t like seeing my best friend eye-fuck my wife.” He hissed.

You couldn’t believe what you were hearing. This was beyond insane. You were annoyed that, after all these years, Remus still got uptight about stuff like this. You supposed that it was better that he was upset opposed to not caring, but it made you feel like he didn’t trust you.

“You’re out of your mind,” You sneered; “Sirius is your best friend. He would never do that.”

Remus rolled his eyes. His cheeks were burning red and the tips of his ears matched his face. He was almost ready to explode.

“For the love of- stop. Just stop talking.” He said turning on his heel to enter the bathroom.

You felt a rush of anger. There was no way you were going to let him talk to you like that. You caught the bathroom door right before it completely closed, Remus looking to you with an agitated expression. You basically marched up to him, just centimeters away from him.

“If you want me to stop talking,” You began, not at all anticipating what this would lead to; “then make me.”

Remus froze for a moment. He quirked a stoic brow and ran his tongue along the inside of his cheek. He gave a cocky chuckle.

Challenge accepted.

He stared at you for another moment before crashing his lips roughly to yours. He brought his hand up and grabbed a fistful of your hair. He backed you into the bedroom once more, pushing you up against the nearest wall. His hand was still in your hair, yanking your head back and sucking hard on your neck. It wasn’t hard enough to hurt, but enough to surely get your attention and send waves of pleasure through you. He growled low in his throat and continued to nip at your neck.

“I can make you stop talking,” He announced, his voice muffled in the skin of your neck; “I can make a hell of a lot prettier noises come out of you too.”

“I’d love to see you try.” You tried to say confidently, but it came out more of a desperate whine.

You let out a surprised gasp when he suddenly kissed you again, nothing short of rough and hot. You let out a hum, and he pulled back and looked at you with so much lust that you felt a shiver travel down your spine. His hands were tight and firm on your waist, keeping you completely pressed against him. His pupils were blown twice their usual size.

“Get on your knees.” He instructed seriously.

You didn’t immediately respond, a little jarred and very aroused at his sudden assertiveness. This had really riled him up. When you didn’t move, his grip loosened on your waist but his eyes narrowed a touch.

“Did I stutter? Get on your knees.” He ordered again, much more sternly.

You slowly sank to the floor, your knees hitting the carpet. You looked away for a split second to get situated, but his hand grabbed your chin, forcing you to look at him.

“Eyes on me.” He said, looking down at you.

You looked up at him, eyes shining with desire and expectation. His gaze studied your every move and expression. You went to quickly put your hair up, but he stopped you.

“Don’t touch your hair.” He said, holding it up himself.

You ran your hands over his hips, trailing to his pants. You unfastened his belt and unzipped his pants, letting them fall to the floor. He sprung forth in front of you, and he moved one hand to the top of your head. You eyed his tip for a millisecond, so quickly that he didn’t even notice your break of eye contact.

“Can I...?” You said, opening your mouth just ever so.

He smirked down at you.

“Be my guest.” He replied.

You put your mouth over his length, suddenly gagging when he shoved your head further into his crotch. He pulled out.

“You better take it like I know you know how to.” He said, shoving back into your mouth again.

You were prepared this time, swallowing around him and working through the reflex. You sucked and kissed, a moan escaping from the man above you. His grip was unchanged on your head, but his fingers were stroking gently. His words came out a bit mumbled as he continued to slam back into your mouth.

“Such a good girl...” He muttered.

His hand in your hair pulled your head back and he rocked his hips roughly into your mouth. Then pulled back and rocked into you over and over.

“Every time you’re such a pretty girl on your knees for me...taking me so well.” He groaned, tossing his head back.

You hummed in affirmation, almost giggling at the way his eyes rolled back into his head. He thrusted a few more times before removing himself from your mouth, watching you swallow his pre-ejaculation. You noticed the fire in his eyes had returned.

He pulled you from the floor forcefully, snatching the zipper on the back of your dress down and pushed it off of your body. He stopped cold when he realized you hadn’t been wearing anything underneath it the entire night. You fought the urge to grin at his face. His eyes raked over you, he was hungry for you.

“Seems I’ve forgotten your favorite thing to take off...must’ve slipped my mind.” You snickered.

His expression was dead serious, as he pulled you to his half-naked body. You began to unbutton his shirt, whipping it off of him in a flash.

“Get on the bed.” He demanded.

With the sound of his tone, you wasted no time getting on the bed, laying back on the pillows. He grazed over your body, taking it all in. A hot flush ran through your face, almost being tempted to look away. He dove down and buried his face into your neck, sucking just as hard as before. You arched your body upward to meet his, an appreciative praise coming from him.

“You’re so damn beautiful.” He said in an almost whisper.

Your hands gripped at his biceps as he left bruise after bruise along your neck, spending extra time on the spots that he knew were most sensitive. Your breathing was heavy, your body wriggling in impatience.

“Remus...” You whimpered.

He looked down at you, a few tufts of his supple hair had fallen onto his forehead.

“What, baby?” He purred, knowing he was driving you crazy.

He captured your nipple in his mouth, sucking hard. You moaned out and arched against him. His teeth just barely biting down.

“Please...” You pleaded.

You threw your head back in frustration when he withdrew his mouth from your breast. He was going to drag this out as long as he possibly could.

“Please what?” He egged you on.

“Please fuck me.” You begged.

He gave a thoughtful hum. He looked over you once more.

“I don’t know...you’ve been awfully bad tonight,” He replied, a devious grin on his face; “Wearing absolutely nothing under your clothes, knowing that you had more attention than just mine.”

You rolled your eyes. If he wasn’t going to please you, then you’d do it yourself. You reached your hand down to your aching, heated sex. You went to rub your throbbing clit, but he grabbed your wrist so hard that you let out a little yelp.

“Don’t you dare.” He warned.

You gave an exasperated sigh, you couldn’t take it anymore.

“Merlin- Remus, please.” You cried out again.

He pinned both of your hands above your head to keep you from trying anything. He let out a seductive chuckle.

“You are just so eager tonight, kitten.” He mumbled.

He shifted to where he was towering over you, you wiggled excitedly in preparation. You knew you were about to get your world rocked. He lined himself up and pressed into you finally. Your heart fluttered at the feeling you had been craving for so long now. He pulled out almost completely and slammed hard back into you.

“You feel so good.” You panted, trying to get your hands free of his hold.

He lifted your leg over his shoulder at that, giving him a better angle so he could go deeper. Remus then slid out and slammed in as far as he could, groaning at the feeling and the sounds you were making. Delicious noises were coming from both of you, pure feelings of ecstasy and desire. He began to fuck you hard and fast until the sounds of your cries and his moans were echoing off of the walls.

“Could Sirius ever make you feel this good?” He asked breathlessly; “Could he ever fuck you like this?”

You shook your head in response, but that wasn’t good enough.

“Answer me.” He ordered.

“No. He couldn’t. Only you.” You cried out.

In response, he rubbed hard circles on your clit. A new round of whimpers escaping your chest. The hot coil in your belly was growing quickly. He could feel it. He sped up his pace, feeling you tighten around him as you released.

He slammed into you again, his cock pulsing hard before filling you completely. He groaned into your shoulder as he came. He collapsed on top of you, your moans were replaced with erratic breathing. Remus looked at you as you regained control over your body again. He had let go of your hands, your fingers running lazily through his hair. He purred contently, a feeling of pure bliss and serendipity washing over him.

Your mind was reeling. You had never seen him like that. He had gotten worked up and angry before, but he had never put it into motion like that. You thought about your fight and how upset he was. Although, now he didn’t seem so agitated anymore. You continued to scratch lightly at his scalp, calling his name out softly.

“Remus?”

He looked to you again.

“Yes?”

You kissed his forehead, a warm glow appearing on his face.

“You know I’m all yours, right? I would never want to be with anyone else.” You assured him.

He knew that deep down. He knew you loved him the way he loved you. But sometimes he just became worried. What if he suddenly wouldn’t be enough? What if someone more charismatic or more...handsome came along? He tried not to think about it.

Based on the way you were looking at him now, though, and the way you were touching him, he knew it wasn’t something he had to think about. He peppered you with much softer kisses now. He felt an overwhelming amount of care and love. This is exactly where he wanted to be.

“I know.”

[natashxromanovf]

hi taja i wanted to request for remus or sirius x reader with dialogue prompt 1. the reader is very closed off, parents fought a lot so doesnt believe love exists and if it does its a weakness and all and remus/sirius knows she has also fell in love with remus/sirius but is afraid and remus/sirius confront her? angst pls

Maybe in Another World

Remus Lupin x gn!reader

Word count: 583

Warnings: mild swearing, not a happy ending

A/N: I’m sorry, you want angst?! Well, your wish is my command; here it is. Thanks for requesting!

Navigation (check for status) // Masterlists

Your parents fought a lot when you were little - that’s where the all ‘not believing in love’ thing comes from. You never really understood the meaning behind it; people like each other, they get together but when their relationship becomes too boring they either break up or one of them cheats. All relationships are meant to end eventually, it’s just a matter of time. And there’s one more thing. When two people fall for one another, they tell each other everything - from their favourite food to their deepest, darkest secrets. In a way, you see it as a weakness.

So when you started developing feelings for Remus you quickly pushed them deep, deep down and kept your distance. Which was hard at first, looking at the fact that you two are practically best friends but you managed. It’s better than allowing the feelings to find their way up to the surface and eat you alive. Multiple people tried confronting you about it but you always found an excuse to not talk about it; there’s no need to explain it.

Until one day you couldn’t avoid it anymore. Because if one thing is true about Remus is that he’s really insistent. Once he puts his mind to something, there’s no way you can stop him - you can try and try but he won’t quit, he’s just too stubborn.

“Okay, what’s going on?” he asks as he stops you by getting ahold of your wrist. You turn around, a deep sigh escaping your lips.

“Nothing’s going on Remus, leave me alone,” you bark, an annoying look on your face. It’s all a disguise though - you know that he knows exactly what’s going on. You’re one of the most obvious people on the planet.

“Bullshit, Y/N, I just wanna hear you say it,”

“Say what, Remus?! That I have feelings for you? That I’m an idiot who fell in love with you?” you shout, a hurt look replacing the previously annoying one. “I don’t know what fairy tales your parents told you about love when you were little but mine sure as hell didn’t tell me anything. But I’ve seen a lot, I’ve seen what love is. The pain that it costs, all the fighting and screaming, and the worst thing is that I had to witness that. I had to bear the fights throughout all my childhood, telling me more about love than words ever could. It’s bullshit and it makes you weak. Love is for children when they still believe in everything their parents told them. So no, I will not allow myself to feel that.” you finish as a tear escapes your eye, looking up so that you keep the others at bay.

“Oh, Y/N/N. I’m sorry you went through that but being in love is not a weakness, you know,” he smiles, a terrible attempt at comforting you.

“Maybe not for you,” you state, taking his hand in yours. “I’m sorry, Rem yet I can’t do this. I really hope you find someone that does believe in love, who will respect you and love you. But I’m not that person.” is the last thing you say before leaving the room, kissing his cheek as a goodbye. It’s better this way - in the end, the only thing you would do is hurt him and he does not deserve that. He’s an amazing person and someday, he’ll find the perfect person for him. That day is not today though.

I hope you enjoyed this! As always, feedback is very much appreciated <3

[sirius-archive]

I Hate You (I Love You)

Pairing: Sirius Black x Reader, mentioned Remus Lupin x Reader

Warnings: Smut!!!!! Swearing !!!!! Angst !!!!!! NO MINORS ALLOWED !!!!!!!!

Word Count: 🤷🏽‍♀️who tf is counting????

Prompt:  4.“Why are you lying to me” 5. “Forget it, you’re a fucking asshole.” 7.” Do you even still love me?” 11. “Can you shut up for once in your life?”

Request: (1)Hey, can you do a Sirius one with 4,5,7 if you are still doing the requests??? I am seriously in need of some heavy angst. (2) Omg yay!! Angst 4 and 11 for sirius please ❤❤❤ ily

A/N: I havent done smut for ages lol

***

Loving Sirius Black is a very beautiful, very complicated thing.

On the one hand, he’s charming and spontaneous and romantic, loyal to a fault, honest and kind hearted and generous with his affection, always having to touch you and be near you as though you make him feel whole, make him feel safe.

On the other, he’s jealous and suspicious and hot tempered and his anger is like being caught in the midst of a thunder storm; forks of lightning strike in his eyes and his voice is a deep, sky-splitting roar, making the room shake and the air shudder.

You, however, fiercely stand your ground

When the two of you collide, it’s like an earthquake without a warning. The entire Gryffindor tower goes silent, listening to the broken symphony of screams and crashing furniture, magic exploding from the pair of you as your anger fills up the room, charging the air with static electricity  

Today is no different.

“Forget it, you’re a fucking asshole,” You snap, bitterly, as you climb to your feet and stomp away from the picnic rug Sirius had laid out, “Trust you to ruin our six month anniversary.”

“Oh so it’s my fault?” Sirius yells, sardonically, “Let’s all blame Sirius like we always do!”

You lift your chin, “I’m not the one who drags up OLD relationships, Sirius, you did that all on your own!”

Sirius’ eyes narrow, his fingers twitching around the bottle of fire whiskey in his grasp.

“If you didn’t give me a reason to then I wouldn’t.”

“Oh my god, can you shut up for once in your life?!” You yell, blood roaring in your ears, “How many times do I have to tell you? It’s over between me and Remus!! It’s been over for TWO FUCKING YEARS!!”

“Do you think I’m a fool?!!” Sirius barks, suddenly jumping to his feet. His fingers tighten, knuckles white and bulging, as though he were trying to strangle the throat of the bottle, “Because I’m many things but I’m NOT a fool!! I see the way he looks at you (Y/N)-“

“Well that’s HIS problem, Sirius, because when we ended things, it was amicably. Jesus, why aren’t you listening to me?”

Sirius shoots a hand through his hair and curses thickly under his breath. His chest is heaving. You watch him as he begins to pace, your heart hammering, your blood boiling.

“FUCK!” He suddenly blurts and you start. He kicks a chair and it flies across the room, smashing against the opposite wall. He doesn’t met your eyes as he murmurs, his voice hoarse.

“Why are you lying to me?”

“I’m not!”

“You are!”

“Sirius!” Your eyes are stinging with hot, angry tears, an invisible bubble growing in the back of your dry throat, “I’m not lying to you!”

“WELL WHAT IS IT?” He booms, and the furniture scatters as through leaping out of the way of his rage, “WHAT AREN’T YOU TELLING ME?!”

You swallow thickly. Tears you hadn’t realised you’d shed are drying on your cheeks.

“NOTH-!”

“-DON’T!” Sirius roars, hurling the bottle across the room. It smashes loudly, spraying foam and glass against the wall, “DON’T FUCKING SAY IT OR I SWEAR TO GOD-“

“What?” You taunt, waspishly, taking a daring step toward him, “What are you going to do, Sirius?”

A charged silence descends upon the two of you. You glower at him, long and hard. He glares at you, fierce and wild. Every ounce of your being feels consumed with rage.

“What is wrong with you?” You spit, hoarsely. Sirius stares. You stare back and continue, valiantly, “I’ve always loved you, Sirius...since the day we met. I’ve supported you. I’ve cried over you. I’ve fought for you. And even when I was with other people...it was always you. That’s why Remus and I ended it, Sirius. Because he knew I loved you and only you and I’ll always fucking love you,” you break off, glancing away from him. Your bottom lip trembles and you bite down on it long enough to voice the question that’s been swirling around in your head, “And yet...I can’t help but wonder whether you love me too, because you certainly don’t seem to trust me, let alone your friends. Sirius, do you even love me?”

The silence is absolutely deafening. The tension feels sentient, like it’s grasping your throat with a strong, unforgiving grip. Sirius stands still, eyes trained on yours, and he stares at you for so long, you don’t think he’s going to respond.  

And then-

His lips crash against yours, fierce and hungry, the force of his kiss throwing you off balance but he catches you before you can topple over, his hands gripping your waist, fingers digging into your skin. He tastes bitter and tangy, like alcohol and self-destruction, but you can’t deny the way it makes you shudder, the way it liquifies your abdomen and makes you forget about the pointless fights and the screaming matches.

And when his tongue delves into your mouth, when it curls and licks and tastes, it’s with a definite undertone of aggression, the kind that makes this even more delicious.

Sirius breaks apart for only a moment before he’s diving down to taste the skin of your neck, biting on the spot that melts your spine. His tongue swirls over the bite mark and then he’s blazing a trail up the pillar of your throat, across your jaw until he meets your lips again.

Teeth clanging against yours in another bruising kiss, Sirius strips you of your clothes with a single flick of his wrist and then makes quick work of his own.

“Sirius,” you gasp, gripping his shoulders as he pushes into you, too desperate and hungry for foreplay.

“Jesus fuck you’re wet,” he grunts, rocking his hips against yours.

“You’re fault,” you moan, scraping your nails down his spine and delighting in the little shudder that follows.

“Guess it is always my fault,” he smirks and you want to punch him and kiss him at the same time.

Sirius sets a rough, frantic rhythm, desperate for release, thrusting in and out of you and groaning with every deep, wet plunge.

“Merlin, Sirius,” you moan, “I’m so close. So fucking close.”

Sirius’ lips twitch into a smug smirk and then the callous pad of his thumb is pressing into your clit and your gasping, spasming around you as your climax hits you like a gigantic fucking wave.

A few moments later, Sirius slams into you with a cry of your name and then he’s burying himself inside of you, as deep as he can go as his cum pours out of him in rivulets.

Sirius rests his forehead against yours, panting, and you can taste the fire whiskey in his breath as it fans against your lips.

“I’m sorry,” he breathes, and then he reaches up to cup your cheek, “I’m sorry. I do love you - Merlin - I love you more than life itself.”

You cover your hand over his, leaning into his touch as he presses a gentle, tender kiss to your lips. The force of his kiss, the desperation in the moan that rumbles in the back of his throat, the way his mouth moves against yours - you can tell without words that he means it.

You believe him.

***

@jamespottersimp​ @mflufflion​ @tinymalscoffee​ @beyoncesdragon​ @moon-zodiac @siriusmuch​ 

[tinawriting]

This is what we fought for (S.B)

Requested: Yes/No

Pairing: Sirius Black x fem!reader

Navigation

Summary: Everyone is trying to keep the Potters safe during the war. Sirius suspects. Y/n has an idea.

Warnings: swearing, mentions of death, one sex joke, little bit of angst at the end, not proofread, my english.

A/N: Everyone lives/Nobody dies AU! This was really fun to write and an amazing idea. This is how things should have gone.

Word count: 2.4k

Green lights were surrounding them. His breath was caught on his throat, the not knowing if they were going to get out of this one, the panic rising. He felt a hand grip his, he looked up to meet warm and soft eyes, home.

It was always like this with her, they could communicate with just a look. He nodded and let himself stand up, gripping his wand tightly, out of the corner of his eye he saw Y/n stand up as well. She was next to him but he had never felt so far away from her, he needed her touch, he needed her to get out of this one. Even if he didn't.

He started running towards the lights and felt how Y/n was closely behind him. When he saw them he didn't hesitate in start hexing them, not to kill them, no. Dumbledore said they had to just stop them, much to Sirius' dismay, if you asked him, he wouldn't care if all Voldemort's Death Eaters died tonight.

He started throwing hexes at everyone, but his mind was elsewhere. Y/n wasn't on sight anymore, and even if he knew how capable she was he couldn't help but looking for her among the crowd. He was so distracted he failed to notice the person coming from behind him.

"Crucio!"

"Protego!"

Sirius turned around to see Y/n face to face with the disgusting Antonin Dolohov. She had intercepted the spell coming in Sirius' direction. Coward, he thought, his only way of attack is from behind. Dolohov raised his wand in her direction with a sneer on his face.

He grabbed Y/n's arm and pulled her roughly behind him, his body shielding her from Dolohov.

"You hurt her and I'll fucking murder you." He said gritting his teeth, not breaking eye contact. He felt her tugging on his sleeve from behind, his arm still keeping her in place.

"Sirius, we have to go now," she said in his ear. "They're coming from everywhere! Let's go!"

He doesn't want to tear his eyes from Dolohov, but he can hear how they're being surrounded. He grabs her more firmly and Apparates them away.

"I could've handled him."

"I was just protecting you!"

They were in the Order Headquarters. After Apparating there, a couple of healers had help them with their wounds. Then, Y/n had grabbed Sirius' arm and guided him to an empty bedroom to talk to him about the Dolohov incident.

"Do not raise your voice with me Sirius Black," said Y/n lowly and with fire in her eyes. "And I don't need you to protect me. When we're fighting you're not my boyfriend anymore, you're my partner. I needed you to keep fighting."

"So you're saying it's my fault?" He said with an incredulous look on his face.

"I did not say that. But it you keep underestimating my abilities you're going to get us killed."

"I don't underestimate your abilities!"

"Then why the fuck wouldn't you just keep fighting and let me deal with Dolohov?"

"I don't want to lose you!"

"You will if you keep this up!"

They were screaming at this point, the eye contact almost unbearable. The silence allowed them to hear the laughs coming from the other side of the house.

"I can't lose you," he whispered. "I would kill me. I can't."

She took a couple steps towards him and he opened his arms for her. One of his arms on her back hold her close while the other kept her head against his chest. He kissed the top of her head and rested his chin there. Until this moment he had forgotten how small she was compared to him, how he would need to look down to look at her in the eye. He felt her shaking and how a puddle of tears were damping his shirt. In that moment he realized that tears were forming in his eyes too.

"I don't want to keep fighting Sirius," she said, her voice muffled by his chest. "I want this to end. I want to live normally, I want a house, a family. I'm tired of watching the people I care about die."

"I know my love, I promise you that I will give you that. Everything you want and more."

"I'm just saying," said Sirius. "You should keep an eye on him."

"I think Sirius is right." Said Peter.

"I don't," said James sternly. "Where did this come from?"

"We're not allowed to go on full moons with him anymore, and he’s supposed to get information from the other werewolves. How do we know what he does with them?"

Lily and Y/n were in the Potters' living room sitting on the couch. Y/n had a sleeping Harry wrapped in a blanket on her arms while Lily was reading a book.

"Do they think we can't listen?" Said Y/n looking at the closed kitchen door, behind it, James, Sirius and Peter were discussing who could be the spy that had been telling Voldemort details only people from the Order could know.

"They probably think we can't hear a word." Said Lily nodding. Y/n frowned at the closed door and decided she had to have a talk to her dear boyfriend. She gave Harry to Lily and stared a moment at the love in Lily's green eyes when she looked at her baby, this is what we're fighting for, she thought.

She opened the door a little harder that she wanted to and stared at Sirius' grey eyes, his soft smile fell when he noticed the hard look she was giving him.

"What is your problem? You don't trust your friends anymore?"

"Darling, this is really not your-"

"Not my place? Not my problem? What Sirius? Do you think the fact that there's a fucking spy breathing on my best friend's neck isn't my problem? Do you think that you talking shit about our friend behind his back without any other argument that 'he's a werewolf' isn't my fucking problem? All your life you've been judged for being a Black and you're doing the same with him? Do you really think Remus is the spy?"

"I'm not saying he's the spy just because he's a werewolf!"

"That's exactly what you're saying!"

"We can't trust anyone anymore!"

She scoffed. "Do you suspect me? Do you suspect Peter?" She noticed how Peter made a soft sound and turned to look at him, his hands were picking at a loose strand of his sweater and was trembling slightly. Strange. She looked at Sirius again. "Don't you trust your own friends anymore? Who are you?"

He looked incredulously at her and a little bit hurt. "Of course I trust you! You're my life, I will always trust you." He then looked at Peter. "And I trust Pete of course, you know what? That's it! He should be the secret keeper instead!"

What?

"What?" Said the rest of them in unison.

"Yeah! We won't tell Lupin and he'll think I'm the secret keeper. It's just a precaution."

She huffed. "Fine. Do whatever you want." And then she got out of the kitchen and entered the bathroom. What was Peter's problem? He had always been a nervous boy but the fact that he had contradicted James earlier and agreed with Sirius was something weird. She didn't want to judge him without any reasonable arguments like Sirius did with Remus. But how could she protect her friends? She heard a knock on the door and she just knew who it was, they were connected.

Se opened the door and saw Sirius standing there looking sheepishly back at her. "I'm sorry."

She sighed and let him in. "I know, I'm sorry too," she said closing the door. "I feel like we're fighting all the time lately."

He exhaled and met her eye, a smirk forming slowly on his face. "We've been doing other things too." He said looking her up and down. She chuckled softly, the tension leaving her shoulders. He raised a hand and held her cheek, caressing her softly. "I love you so much."

"I love you more." She said smiling softly at him.

"Imposible." He said leaning down and connecting their lips. She tried to show him how much he meant to her into the kiss. She let her fingers run through his hair and opened her mouth for him to deepen the kiss.

After they parted, she looked at his soft grey eyes, home.

An idea popped in her head. "I'm staying here."

"What?"

"I'm staying here, I'll be locked up with them until the Order needs me."

"What if I need you?" He looked like he was about to cry and her heart broke.

"I'll come home. I will," she said holding his face. "But I'll be here a lot, that's it, you won't even notice I'm gone."

"You know I will," his eyes were a little glassy and she hugged him tight. "Please be careful."

A week after that, Y/n wanted to give Harry the Halloween hat she knitted for him. It was absolutely horrible but she just wanted an excuse to go see her godson.

"That's really pretty." Said Sirius coming from behind her and wrapping his arms around her waist. She laughed.

"No, it's not."

He chuckled. "It's really not." He kissed her cheek. "Are you going to be alright? Are you sure you want to go alone?"

"I'll be fine," she said turning around in his arms and placing a soft kiss on his lips. "I love you."

"I love you."

She grabbed her bag and wand and Apparated to Godric's Hollow, she walked where the house was and knocked. James was opening the door in no time and let her in, once inside he pulled her in a bone-crashing hug. "It's so nice to see you." He whispered into her ear. Soft giggles could be heard from upstairs, she smiled brightly and ran to see Harry. Lily was next to his crib and kissing his plump cheeks, she walked up to them and hugged Lily, Y/n kissed Harry's head softly and then placed the hideous hat on it. Lily made a face and then smiled kindly.

"It's horrible." She said.

"I know." Y/n replied.

Then, a loud explosion was heard downstairs, Lily and Y/n looked at each other wide-eyed.

"Send a Patronus." Said Y/n.

Then Y/n ran out of the room at the same time James cried out "Lily, Y/n, take Harry and go! It's him! Go! Run! I'll hold him off!"

Her eyes were almost out of her skull and she couldn't go faster. She saw in a blur James' wand and she shouted "Accio wand!"  She then saw James trying to hold back Voldemort wandless and looked in horror at how he raised his wand in James' direction.

“Avada Kedav-”

"Impedimenta!" She cried.

Y/n watched how Voldemort's action slowed down, she grabbed James by his arm and got him out of Voldemort's reach. She handed him his wand and heard various 'pop' of people Apparating, she hoped it was their friends and not some Death Eater. She watched as Voldemort's actions were slowly coming back to normal when Sirius and Remus appeared at the front door, Voldemort's red eyes made contact with hers.

"Crucio!"

In a fraction of second, her back hit the ground, a high-pitched noise in her ears was making her head hurt, she could feel herself screaming but couldn't hear it. All her limbs felt on fire, the pain almost unbearable. She lifted her head to see three rays of green light from her friend's wands being directed at Voldemort, and then, everything went black.

Her head hurt so much. She couldn't move. She couldn't even open her eyes. I must be dead. That's why I can't move. And then, she heard soft sobs and someone -no, Sirius- grabbing her hand delicately.

"Please, Y/n. Please come back to me." I'm here Sirius, I'm okay. "You saved James, and Lily, and Harry. And I'm so grateful for that, but I can’t be happy if you’re not with me. I’ll never be happy without you. I know you can save yourself too, you can do this my love, please come back. Come back so I can give you that house we talked about, so we can get married and have kids. Please.”

She slowly opened her eyes, her vision was blurry and when she turned her head she saw Sirius sitting on a chair with his head down, his hair shielding his eyes. She squeezed his hand weakly and he lifted his head so fast his neck made a sound.

He got up and sat down next to her in the bed she now realised it was James and Lily's. "Hello princess," he said kissing her softly, and her headache disappeared for a moment. "You had me worried." He chuckled, but it was empty, she noticed the tears strains in his cheeks and she lifted a hand to caress them away. He smiled. He hadn’t smiled a real smile in days and she thought she had never see him more beautiful.

“You’re beautiful.” Y/n said and he laughed softly. Then, she remembered. “Peter.” She whispered.

Sirius smile fell. “Yeah,” he said. “Remus… he didn’t do anything, you were right. We’re good now, though. He was understanding of the whole situation. I can’t believe I ever doubted him.”

“Did you kill him?” She asked wide-eyed. “Voldemort?”

“Yeah, the three of us used the killing curse on him. Dumbledore said we won’t go to Azkaban for doing it.” She scoffed, of course they weren’t, she would get them out herself if they were. “It was all thanks to you. James told us what you did, they would all be dead if it weren’t for you.”

“And Peter?”

Sirius’ frowned. “He… he disappeared, that stupid rat, we don’t know where he is. But it’s over now.” He started sobbing again, but he was smiling. “It’s over, we’re okay. We’re all okay. James, Lily, Remus and Harry. Harry is perfect! He has that disgusting hat on and he laughs!”

She smiled and tears were falling from her eyes as well. “I want to see them.”

“Yes, of course,” he said hurriedly before kissing her forehead. “I’ll bring them.”

Sirius got out of the room and she took a moment to breathe. It was over now, Voldemort was gone. The Potters were fine, Remus was fine, Sirius and her were fine. When the door opened again, the first thing she saw was the smiling face of her godson and thought this is what we fought for.

[unconventional-lawnchair]

We'll heal together: Prologue

Harry Potter x Reader (Platonic)

Masterlist

Summary: Harry Potter grew up without the warmth of a family he should have known. A father in James Potter, a mother in Lily Potter, a God Father in Sirius Black, and an Uncle in Remus Lupin. Oh, and let's not forget, an aunt in {Y/N} {L/N}.

Cw: Use of {Y/N}, thoughts of self pity and mourning, {please reach out if I missed something}

Wc-526

Harry felt lost, he felt cold.

He found himself at the astronomy tower late at night, wrapped in the invisibility cloak up to his neck and leaning forward on the banister rail. His eyes were hazy, glossy and warm, fogging his glasses. With a huff he pulled them off and cleaned them with a corner of the cloak, sliding them back up his face as the hot tears that threatened to spill just made him repeat the process.

He had been wandering late at night, really anything to keep his mind off of everything that had happened so far. He felt guilty, this year had started off so well, all of his friends seemed to be happy, but here he was, Harry Potter, moping over a love he truly never knew.

He found his eyes drifting up to the stars. He had never seen so many before Hogwarts, in the city he grew up in, even the skies seemed dark in the clearest of nights. His mind attempted to wander, back to the Dudley's and the cupboard he slept in. The life he was denied and the truths they kept. But he pulled himself from those thoughts as soon as he could, focusing instead on the lights.

He squinted, as if the constellations he learned of in class would suddenly take shape. That they would morphe into creatures and instruments, the ones that matched the stories he heard. That Leo would suddenly come to life and the two lions he heard so much about would return to him, back home to his heart. He found it fitting, being born to those clusters of stars. He himself had put them up there, in protecting him, and now they were forever what he would think of. The two lions who fought so fiercely just to meet him. Just to have him. But he sat here, weeping their names, as if he had even known them.

He shook the thought away. He would not sit here moping about his dead parents. Even with his mini pep talk, he found his eyes dragging up to the sky once more. His eyes caught by the brightest star in the sky. He frowned, slowly sitting up straight as he witnessed it, a pout growing harder. Before he could ponder what the longing in his heart was, he heard it. The foot falls of the Prefects on their rounds.

Harry huffed and shook his head. He needed to go back to bed.

The moon provided a strange warmth in his stomach that he had never known before, as its light flickered in the halls everytime he passed a window. He let his eyes trail back to the window, pausing for only a moment as he saw what seemed to be a small fox scurry its way between the courtyard walls and a small burrow it seemed to have made for itself. He found himself smiling despite it all, tonight was.. wasn't all bad. Summer was soon, and next year, there would be no Tom Riddle, no basilisks to fight, no Lockheart. After this summer, it would be okay.

Year 3 would be his year.

[band--psycho]

Remus Lupin x Reader-Treat You Better

Requested by my dear friend @xacatalepsyx​, I hope you all enjoy this! 💛 // Inspired by Treat You Better by Shawn Mendes(Flashback in italics)

Prompt List Requests / 1.3k Writing Celebration Masterlist / Marauder Era Masterlist / Music Writing Challenge Masterlist

Third Person POV

“Is Y/n/n not coming?” Remus asked as he met up with Lily, Marlene and the marauders. 

“Probably not,” Lily said in a somber tone, her eyes glancing over to Marlene, sharing a knowing look, one that Remus quickly picked up on.  

“Again?” Remus asked, a mixture of sadness and anger lacing his voice. 

“You can’t be surprised, Moony,” Sirius said, placing a comforting hand on his friends shoulder.

“He’s always been a dick, mate, I don’t know why she gave him another chance in the first place,”James added with a sigh. 

“Because..it’s Y/n/n...she’s constantly giving people more chances than they deserve, remember Eric?” Marlene said, earning an audible sigh from the people around her as well as a few eye rolls. Eric was one of the worst boyfriends Y/n/n had ever had; he cheated on her countless times, lied to her countless times, controlled and belittled her constantly. The only reason that relationship ended was because Lily, Marlene and the rest of the marauders got involved, it was like staging an intervention. Since then Y/n/n had had a few boyfriends but they all left as quickly as they came, leaving her feeling unlovable. 

“I’ll go check on her,” Remus said, bidding his friends goodbye before bolting up the stairs to the Gryffindor common room. 

Y/n never had much luck when it came to love, she had a big caring heart, no one could deny that, but she often gave it away to the wrong people. People that didn’t treasure it the way her heart and the love that came with it should’ve been treasured. Many of them would use her for what they wanted, say all the right things...make her fall for them and then drop them when they got what they wanted. Or they’d cheat on her and then come crawling back begging for a second chance which she would give them, despite the warnings she would get from her friends, Y/n/n/ would constantly say the same thing ‘he’s changed, he’s promised he’s going to change,’ of course, these words were not true and within the space of a week she’d be found in her dorm room heartbroken because she’d been let down again. Her best  friends, Lily and Marlene would constantly try to warn her away from guys like this, even the marauders got involved, hating to see her hurt constantly by people that didn't deserve her, but it didn’t hurt anyone as much as it hurt Remus. The light brown haired marauder had liked Y/n/n for years, but he refused to say anything, no matter how many times the other marauders tried to persuade him to. He was the closest to her out of the marauders, they would spend hours talking in the library or in the common room, talking about everything and anything. They were great friends to start with and then Remus’ feelings began to change...he started to fall for her, not that he admitted to anyone (including himself) until one night in the library. 

~~~~~~~

It had been a long day; exam stress, boyfriend stress, life stress. Y/n/n was just very stressed out today. So she went to the one place she knew she’d be alone, in the library. It was her safe place. The one place no one would bother her because right now she just wanted to be alone. Just as she turned the corner to go to her secret space, right at the back of the library she noticed a small flickering light. She froze. Until she saw the familiar face of one of her closest friends, Remus John Lupin. 

“Y/n/n?” Are you okay?” Remus asked, worry lacing his voice and eyes as he made his way over to Y/n/n.

“Yeah….it’s just been one of those days y’know,” Y/n/n sighed, running her hand through her y/h/c locks. Remus knew what that meant. He knew she was stressed about her exams and he also knew that her boyfriend probably wasn’t helping all that much. He wasn’t as bad as some of the other guys she’d dated but that didn’t mean he was brilliant either….and even though he didn't know what the problem was, Remus knew that that guy had a part to play in her mood tonight. 

“Do you want me to go?”Remus asked, he knew her well enough to know that on days like she prefers to be alone, just to figure everything out. 

“No..no it’s okay,” Y/n/n said with a small smile on her face. She didn’t want him to go...she didn’t know why but she just didn’t. She felt safe around him, like she could step away from all of the things that had been bothering her that day and just relax with him. He was an amazing friend. Sometimes, she caught herself wondering what would happen if they could be more than just ‘friends’ but Remus was Remus. There was no way he’d ever be interested in her. 

“Do you wanna talk about it?” Remus asked, his words snapping Y/n/n out of her little daydream.

“Not really,” Y/n/n answered, shaking her head quickly. The last thing she needed was another ‘I told you so,’ she’d already gotten that from Lily and Marlene. 

“What about a distraction? I just started reading this book from the Muggle world; Lily lent it to me..I could...I could read it out loud, if you want?” 

“I’d love that Rem,” She said with a small smile on her face as she sat down next to him, her head resting on her folded arms on the table, her arms acting like a pillow. And with that, Remus flicked back a few pages to the beginning of the book, reading it aloud, loud enough for Y/n/n to hear what he was saying clearly, but still quiet enough that no one who walked past the library would hear. He continued to read for about half an hour, getting lost in the words of the book, it wasn’t until he heard a small little snore from Y/n/n that he realised she was asleep. He couldn’t help but look at her, a look of utter adoration in his eyes. She was beautiful. The most beautiful girl he’d ever met....he’d fought so hard to fight the things he was feeling, not wanting to admit to anyone that he loved her, but he did. He loved Y/n Y/l/n. But he knew that she’d never feel like that about him, especially not while she was in a relationship. Still that didn’t stop him from thinking how much better he could treat her. He wanted to treat her like a princess because that’s what she deserved. She deserved to be happy. Love was meant to make you happy, sure there were ups and downs in every relationship, that was a given but there was also meant to be happiness and joy and love...that’s what Remus wanted to give her. He wanted to give her his love and treat her right. 

~~~~~~~

Remus ran through the portrait, heading straight for the girls dormitory. His hand hovered over the doorknob trying to work out what he was going to say to Y/n/n...but when he heard her crying, his heart took control and he pushed the door open. 

“Remus!” Y/n yelped, her bloodshot eyes piercing into him. 

“What’re you doing in here? I could have been changing or asleep! You had no right to just come-” 

“I had no right?!” Remus bit back, interrupting her sentence before she even got the chance to finish it. The anger in his voice catching them both off guard. A few moments of silence passed, as Y/n/n tried to work out why Remus was so angry and as Remus tried to calm himself down.

“I’m...I’m sorry..Y/n/n..” he whispered, his eyes focused on the ground. 

A few more moments of silence passed before Remus lifted his head up, his gaze now focusing on her “I just...I hate seeing you like this,” as he said those words,he felt the tears begin to brim in his eyes.

“I hate seeing you give your love to people who don’t treasure it...not like I would,” it took him a moment to realise the words he’d just said, had it not been for Y/n/ns wide eyes he would’ve thought that that’s all it was, a thought. 

“Not like you would?” Y/n/n whispered, the tone of her voice soft, but still full of confusion begging for an explanation. Instantly Remus’ eyes fixed on the ground, opening and closed his mouth a few times, almost resembling a fish as he tried to find the right words to explain how he was feeling but it was like any and every word he’d ever learnt had just vanished from his mind. He felt himself getting more and more anxious until he looked up to see Y/n/n. The confused look was still on her face but just the mere sight of her brought him comfort. Comfort enough to allow his mind to think of three simple words. Three simple words that would explain everything he felt. Three words that could destroy the friendship that he held so dear...but they were the only three words he could think of.

“I love you,” he breathed. At first Y/n/n thought she’d wondered into one of her old dreams. The amount of times she’d dreamed of hearing those words come from his lips, was countless. She made her way closer towards him, raising her hand to his face, caressing his cheek softly. This all felt too real to be a dream. The touch of her hand on his skin made his heart skip a beat as a pale blush came across his cheeks. 

“I love you too, Rem...it’s always been you...no one...no one ever comes close,” Y/n/n whispered, her admission catching Remus completely off guard. 

“When-when did you..?” Y/n/n began, her voice trailing off as Remus raised his hand to cover hers. 

“Since that night in the library,” he admitted, a shy smile tugging at his lips.

“Why did you never say?” She asked, continuing to trace small circles on his cheek. 

“Because you were with someone at the time...it wasn’t the right time..and then no time seemed to be the right time…” He answered honestly, before asking her the same questions she’d just asked him. It took Y/n/n a few moments to reply but when she did a somber look came over her face as she mentally cursed herself for not taking the risk to ask him out. 

“I...I always have...but I thought we were just friends...so I just...i just tried to fill the void..” She answered and as Remus looked into her eyes he saw no word of a lie. She was telling the truth. Without another second passing, he connected their lips. The kiss was slow, both of them getting used to one another's lips, but they molded together like they were made for each other, after a while the kiss became more passionate as the pair finally just gave into the feelings they’d harboured for each other for so long. When they did pull away from the kiss, Remus pulled Y/n/n into his embrace, placing a delicate kiss on her forehead before whispering the words “I’m gonna treat you how you should be treated, sweetheart...I’m gonna treat you better than any of them ever did,” and for the first time in probably all of her life, she felt the fairytale love she’d always dreamed of having and the best part is that it was with Remus.

Tag List:

@probably-peeves @loony-loopy-lupinn​ @darthwheezely​ @gloryekaterina​ @jamie-lee666​ @mesmerisedangel​ @heyitskat101 @tigerf-cker​ @coldlilheart​ @hermionesswifee @megaprincesscakes​ @skyofficialxx​ @thatguppienamedbae​ @gcdric​ @hufflepuffsthunderdome​ @amourtentiaa​ @greengecko​ @findzelda​ @ciannemar83​ @trishizzl​ 

[crankynewt]

Chapter One - Losing Game

Another Love Series Masterlist

Pairing: Regulus Black x Fem!Reader, Young!Remus Lupin x Fem!Reader

Song: Arcade - Duncan Laurence

Warnings: Tons of Angst, Major Character Deaths, Pregnancy(?), and I definitely altered the timeline!

Word Count: 1.76k

Masterlist

Author’s Note: This is pretty angsty and was based on this song (which has always given me massive Reggie vibes), and I HIGHLY recommend listening to it when reading this!

Perhaps your love was doomed from the start. Maybe you were just another Shakesperian tale of forbidden romance destined to conclude in nothing but suffering. He was your light despite the darkness that had encompassed him his entire life and although the war was over, the pain still remained. 

You had begged Regulus not to leave that night, tears blurring your vision as he explained that he had to be the one to destroy the horcrux. “There is no other way,” he had said, his voice shaky with the knowledge that this would likely be his end. You were young, too young, to be fighting this war. A battle that neither of you had any business being involved in the first place. Yet there you were, children who had grown up too quickly.

When he hadn’t returned the next morning, it hadn’t come as any surprise. You mourned the loss of your husband the minute he’d walked out that door. You weren’t vapid and neither was he, you were both well aware of what would happen in that cave. Whether or not Regulus succeeded, however, still remained to be seen. 

The isolation following the death of Regulus Black was something you brought upon yourself. You couldn’t stand seeing muggles continuing to lead their lives as if nothing had happened. Your world crumbled out from beneath you as the universe became a much darker place, so why haven’t they stopped? A person - your person - had died, how could people continue to lead their normal lives?  We were still at war, how could they not sense that something was horribly wrong?

The loneliness made you ill after a month, so sick that you were constantly emptying the contents of your stomach into your toilet as you lay on the cool tile. What prompted you to eventually seek out another were the two little lines on the plastic test. Before long you had apparated to Godric’s hollow, the crisp snow of December crunching under your feet as you made your way up the steps of a quaint looking house. It felt much more homey than the Grimmauld flat you’d been residing in, a slight comfort that what laid behind the door you knocked on may be just as welcoming.

The face that answered the door was kind, warm eyes and a welcoming smile framed by ginger locks. You never spoke to her during your years at Hogwarts due to the two years she had on you, but you knew the girl to be Lily Evans. Judging by the slight furrowing of her brows she had recognized you as well, probably unsure as to why Regulus Black’s wife had shown up on her doorstep seemingly out of nowhere.

“Uhm, is Sirius Black here by any chance?” You asked quietly, your gloved hands rubbing your arms as you fought off the evening’s chill. She need not answer as a pair of brown orbs peered at you from behind her.

“What are you doing here, (Y/N)?” Sirius questioned, bitterness lacing his words as he took in your frail appearance. The elder Black did not think highly of his little brother - the Death Eater, or so he thought. Yet Regulus had relayed numerous stories from their childhood that revealed that in earlier years of their lives, the duo had been inseparable. You were just hoping that some of that affection still remained.

“Can we please talk? It’s about your brother.” You said, voice wavering as you shivered in the cold. Lily seemingly took notice of this and ushered you into the warmth of their home, closing the door behind you and leaving the in-laws to speak in the front entryway.

“If Regulus has something to say to me than the little shit can come tell me himself-”

“Sirius, what are you talking about?” You asked incredulously. “Regulus died two months ago.”

Sirius had not been speechless many times in his life, yet there he stood with his head reeling, heart broken, and tears slowly welling in his eyes. At the end of the day, Regulus would always be his baby brother. And in that silence he sat and listened, taking in all of what had happened the past year. From Regulus deciding to turn on Voldemort to the fateful night destroying his horcrux, Sirius felt both pride and guilt building underneath the grief. Regulus had been a good person who gave his life doing the right thing, all in belief of the same values that had gotten himself disowned.

When you mentioned the pregnancy, Sirius once again found himself dumbstruck. But that shock was quickly replaced with a sense of duty, it was as if he had the opportunity to make up for his brother’s broken relationship. He would help you raise this baby, and he would make damn sure that they did not have the same broken childhood he had suffered.

Within the week, Sirius had moved back into 12 Grimmauld Place with you. The baby he was dedicating himself to had quickly become babies after finding out that not one, but two baby Blacks were on the way. He was at your side through every step of the pregnancy, and slowly but surely his friends made their way into your life as well. James was always there to put a smile on your face and Lily gave great advice as to dealing with the pregnancy as she had delivered Harry only weeks before you showed up. Remus was always there to offer chocolate and a good book while Peter always had a hot cup of tea ready for you.

Before long, Arcturus and Cassiopeia Black were welcomed into the world and the light in your life had been restored. They were both the spitting image of their father, seeming to have barely inherited any (Y/L/N) genes and only reminded you of their father with every coming day. Little Harry was thrilled to have playmates, and you had finally found your family. Although far from perfect, it was everything to you. But all good things must come to an end, and this state of grace was no different.

Halloween came and went. James, Lily, and Peter were gone, no, murdered. Sirius could not have done it, not to his family! The man you read about in the papers was not the same gentle soul who would sing the twins to sleep almost every evening. But regardless of what you thought of the man he was guilty in the eyes of the Ministry, and thus he was sent to Azkaban to suffer a fate worse than death. This loss rocked you once more, but this time you had the twins to look after, and you weren’t alone.

Remus had stepped right up to fill the shoes that Sirius had been filling for Regulus without hesitation. He was grieving the same losses as you and found solace in caring for little Archie and Cassie. You mourned together and healed together, and before long Remus became your other half. 

That friendship didn’t last long, however, as it eventually blossomed into something bigger, a love that you fought tooth and nail. Guilt consumed you as you felt yourself falling for the werewolf, not being able to shake the feeling that you were betraying Regulus as you fell deeper and deeper in love. 

Right around the second anniversary of his death was when you heard the first words pass through either of the twins’ lips. Archie squealed a high-pitched “dada” to Remus who had been helping you prepare breakfast, and your eyes met his equally glassy. While the man stuttered out a mix of apologies in fear of overstepping, you just embraced him and allowed him to hold you in the way nobody had for a long time. The toddlers had accepted him as their father, and you had denied the desire to love him for too long.

Six months later the two of you had married in a small ceremony of only Order members gathering to celebrate your love. You did, however, keep the last name ‘Black’ as an homage both to Regulus and Sirius’ roles in both of your lives. At that same celebration you also announced that a baby Lupin would be making their way into the world six months later. And alas, Theodore Lupin was born shortly after, and your little family was complete.

When it was finally time for Archie and Cassie to begin their future at Hogwarts, you couldn’t help but weep as they waved out the window of the Hogwarts Express, the siblings excited to start the next stage in their lives. Your husband wrapped an arm around you as he fought tears himself, meanwhile Teddy tugged onto your hand and questioned when he would get the chance to attend the school as well, already missing his big brother and sister. 

Remus and you had debated what house the twins would be sorted into, him adamant that they showed Gryffindor courage while you were certain that they would follow in your footsteps and be sorted into (Y/H). Your questions were answered the next morning as you received letters from two very excited Slytherins, taking after their father just as they had done in appearance and personality. You and Remus were proud nonetheless, but your husband was always saddened that they had never grown close to Harry. The divide between houses had seemingly grown even stronger since you two had attended and a friendship between the former friends hadn’t formed.

Two years later, the twins were approaching their third year as Teddy prepared to begin his magical schooling, and you began to ponder what your life would look like following their departure. You and your husband didn’t have the finances to travel and feared a life without the light of your children, and your questions were answered following a letter from Dumbledore himself. He offered the two of you teaching positions at Hogwarts, Defence Against the Dark Arts for Remus and Astronomy for yourself.

The two of you were ecstatic to spend the year with your children teaching, and walking side by side with the castle in view made you feel like a young girl again. A broken heart was all that was left, but Remus had been there to pick up your broken pieces and carry you home. But the wreckage of your life would not stay in ruins forever, as old friends and old loves remained closer than you had ever known and were about to rejoin your losing game.

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