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nothisis-ridiculous · 3 years

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Take Me Home Now: Chapter Ten

Chapter Ten: Another Mother's Breakin'

Set after the events of ME3.

A rewrite. Ao3.

FemShepxKaidan

"Jane."

The recruit let the knocking go on for a third round, slowly shaking herself from the rickety cot. While these digs were nothing as fancy as the bunk back at the mall, the privacy was a paradise. Blank, dull, metal-lined walls were a price she was willing to pay over the colorful and plant-lined walls of the barracks. The humming noise of life rebuilding, no she belonged in the silence.

"Jane." This time her name was a statement, backed by a hint of threat.

"Just a moment," she groaned, rubbing the crust from the inner corners of her eyes, pushing sore muscles upright and forcing a shirt over her head but allowing it to fall at its own pace. Her pupils narrowed at the sudden influx of light filling her half of the crate, "morning?"

Helen looked her up and down, that damned frown a returning friend, "you should put a comb through that hair."

"For fuck's sa-"

The woman made a sudden jerk, but it stopped with a simple raising of her arm, brushing aside a fallen lash, "language, dear."

"Sorry," Jane's eyebrows narrowed, had she forgotten she was not a child, "why are you here?"

"Because we are going out."

"Don't I have three more days?" Jane returned.

The older woman in a rare admittance of defeat sighed, offering back a raised eyebrow, "you're well aware that was a ruse."

"I knew it!" she didn't.

"Yes, let's be proud that you are stubborn as they warned," Helen retorted with a hint of a smirk, "but you should be ready. I'm not going to let you slide and get breakfast, either!"

Yes, this encampment was a military installment, but it gave no reason to ready herself with the rest of the soldiers. Since Rahna had given up on her she did little to get out of her bunk. So far, her secret remained, but pushing it by becoming a regular around camp seemed too big of a risk. Evelyn gave her some reason to get out, but the kid quickly found friends. Within days she was no longer needed, though the shit still visited at least once a day that prodded her into some form of semblance. The lack of duties cemented her decision to remain secluded, bidding her time with the running videos in her head.

"So why me?" Jane pressed once they cleared the base by a few thousand meters, pulling the ration bar from her mouth.

The woman's dark eyes turned cross, "and don't you waste those rations."

"You'll never want them again after fresh produce," Jane murmured, swallowing down the bland brick of nutrition in three bites.

"The second reason for coming out here," Helen handed over a pistol, "fresh meat and pest removal."

"You know, someplace on Illium would sell Varren skewers as a delicacy," Jane overlooked the pistol with a grin, "man, could that krogan grill up a mean varren skewer."

"The pistol is back up; you should use biotics. No stunts," she warned without heed of her companion's previous comment.

"I'm a paragon of caution," Jane mumbled in response, deciding then it was best to follow after the woman in silence. Pausing only as her leader stopped.

"No stunts," a finger waggled at her, "that kid and her grandfather want you back, and I intend to see that through, despite your best attempts."

Jane giggled, "the LT would love that one."

"Dismiss it all you like, whinge that someone cares about your sorry hide," the woman spat, "you're being selfish. Everyone is hurting if you haven't noticed."

Jane's face drew blank, "while it's true, doesn't it feel better to be pissed off? To be angry that everything is changed? Fuck everyone else. I'm hurting." She looked over the horizon, directly into the blue beam that connected to the Citadel. It seemed so tiny from here, so insignificant.

Helen's gaze followed Jane's gaze, "trying to remember how much worse it could be rarely helps."

"I like to make myself feel better by telling myself that I'm angering out of grief; it's one of the stages, right? But what is there after it? I don't want to let it go and accept my world is gone," Jane's voice mellowed to a whisper, "acceptance is terrifying. It means you have to move forward."

They shared a silent moment together, connecting with a brief touch—neither alone as they thought.

"Who did you lose?"

"My heart."

"Who did you lose?"

"...my heart."

Horizon- Horizon was an awkward fumbling in the dark. An overhanded display The Illusive Man decided to lord over her. He knew her strings and just how to pluck them to make her dance to his tune. Pulling Kaidan into the entire mess with the Collectors was a threat. But as messy and powerless as the knowledge of what the Illusive Man would take from her was the undercurrent of hope. It was foolish to be caught up in the giddy excitement of returned love, But Kaidan loved her. The first confession and bitter tug on her heart. She should have told him then.

Mars- Mars was just as awkward. Running, sliding, and dodging bullets after months of being cooped up in a small apartment awaiting trial. Sideways glances, and a Major who wouldn't stop dogging her every step. He questioned, prodded, and accused her of terrible things. Granted, she well deserved it. He was so close, so in sync as if the years were mere minutes... yet the distance between them was a canyon wide. But the Major loved her, even if it was once upon a time. A lighthearted exchange broke some of the tension, but she still should have told him then.

The Citadel- "What's up" had to be the lamest greeting after an armed standoff. Not a clasping hug, not a gentle smile, instead she vocalized her worry that he was angry. She hadn't taken the shot at Udina, and she had made Kaidan make that impossible decision. To trust her word, to trust an ex-terrorist. It was too much to ask of anyone- but now she was someone he was in love with. Not a past tense, a was, but a current thing. Still, she fumbled, asking him to let her have it and killing any hope of a romantic reunion. Her stolen glances at his backside caught in the act gave him a sheepish glance away and not the confession he was owed.

The Citadel Pt. II- After a shamelessly little amount of convincing, she had found herself in a dress. It was supposed to be simple- a snack on the Citadel. But she had hoped for more, the flirting, the longing stares, compliments, and a little bit of girlish enthusiasm from Kaidan she dared to think they had a chance. It was the first 'I love you' the extra 'I always have' sending her heart fluttering into erratics that she fought to control, lest she make a scene. The graze of his tender lips against her palm relinquished any grasp she had left on that errant heart, the thundering of the heartbeat clouding her brain. The jealousy the rest of her skin felt for her palm stealing another confession.

2181 Despoina- Kaidan would always rue his attraction to adventurous women. Not the woman, but the spark that drove him there. She was always at risk; her daily amount of adventure qualified as a heroic event for most other citizens of the galaxy. For her, it was a normal Tuesday night. But still, he worried, and still, he continued to love her for the constant stress she brought him. Loved her recklessness because it was as much part of her as her freckles. In the wordless hours of the night, his grip always tighter after a harrowing encounter, she was silent.

The Normandy- Neither of them wanted a quick drink. It was a little silly, after all these years, after all his confessions, to still feel insecure about inviting Kaidan up to her cabin. Instead of being direct, he invented the excuse of a short drink to see her. To comfort each other- when they both knew they needed it. Everything felt so final, the end a ticking bomb, an end to the short time they had together. She found strength in him, a safety in knowing she had someone that would catch her. He loved her openly and proudly. He loved her without needing the words returned.

London- It was unreal, after three years finally approaching the finish line. Loss and love in equal measure. Now, it was time for her to go it alone. It was unnatural, and she fought against the notion. She didn't want to be alone- not at the end. Not after this blissful glimpse into the way love had brightened every facet of her being. Kaidan would gladly face a bitter end with her, going arm in arm to meet Garrus at the bar. But it was a fucked kind of love that pushed her to make him leave. The same love that screamed at him to get the hell off the Normandy, the love that now albeit gently pleaded with him to live. It wasn't a roar or a cry of victory but a rumble- a tender declaration. Kaidan knew, even if it took him repeating his love a thousand times over. Six was a good number, short. The heart knew it was needed.

"So refresh my memory," Jane questioned in a whisper, trying not to draw the entire den of Varren upon them at once, "just how many we are planning on bringing back?"

"Are you that keen on vaporizing them all?"

"I certainly can."

"Wouldn't that defeat one of our goals?"

"Well, I don't think you accounted for the transportation of a Varren," Jane noted, looking behind them at the lack of vessel to transport said game.

Jane was ignored with a huff, the woman peering around a blockade, "I want that one."

Jane took a look, the brown striped specimen had to top the list of heaviest varren she had seen, "seriously?"

"Yes. Jane."

"Aye, Aye, Ma'am."

There wasn't time for a seething look or the smarmy reply that would have followed. The creature floated, air-bound as if the weight of the animal defied gravity. It kicked at the air, unable to stop itself from moving toward the barrier that blocked the scent of view of its hunters. Jane yanked her hand forward, dragging against the invisible weight. It felt good, if not for the shred of panic that she might lose time again. The tell-tale sign of blood was not forthcoming.

The blast of sound ricocheting through the plaza quickly overcame any remaining fear.

"Whatever you do, do not approach these things," the recruit barked, yanking the older woman into the corner spot, "they will overwhelm you if they get close."

"Aye, Aye, Ma'am."

The pack burst from all corners, running full boar in the direction of their fallen packmate. Several running members fell in the chaos, while a line of biotic energy sent the group careening into nearby walls and structures. For what inexperience was worth, Helen held up well, keeping up trained focus on the beasts. The old lady had precision aim, wasting hardly a clip during the charge. Jane didn't have to pick up much slack. Now, if there were a third member, everything would be peachy.

The square was silent for a count of three before a single varren cried out loudly.

The alpha was on scene.

While she had not promised to keep from committing to a hair-brained stunt, biotic shockwaves and lifts were boring. A teenage biotic could perform these moves without a sweat, a N7 needed a challenge. She needed the thrill. Blue waves coalesced and pulsed around her form, the familiar vibration against her skin pleasurable. A fluid vault over the barrier propelling her charge into the lone Varren, sending it toppling from the blow. Jane dove for it, pummeling it with blasts of biotic energy until her knuckles bled.

This was no longer a stunt but a method of release.

"Seems those biotics are back online," Helen murmured, wiping something from her eyes.

Jane cocked her head, "where'd you learn to shoot?"

"That? Oh. I thought they'd go out like a coyote."

The blonde smirked, dismounting the alpha's corpse, wiping her fists against a clean portion of the animal's hide. Nothing from Tuchanka went down quietly.

Helen stood over her prize, after a long minute she looked at Jane expectantly, "aren't you going to grab that?"

"Your trophy, your struggle," Jane folded her arms in return, a sly grin crossing her face, "besides, by the way we snuck out of that base, I don't need any more blame for this... what would you call this, stunt?"

"We did not sneak-" but the woman's face betrayed her guilt.

"Yeah, it's normal procedure to hop a barricade at the precise moment the guard changed," Jane knew a thing or two about sneaking out. She'd even stolen a ship twice.

Helen didn't have to struggle with the corpse long before Jane took pity on the woman; she had an unfair advantage anyway. Genetic enhancements, bone grafting, and a little biotic lifting. Unfortunately, she would still be sore when they got back to base.

"Why the need to sneak out anyway? I'm sure you could have roped anyone into helping you," Jane was under no illusion that the woman had any particular like for her, if anything, the woman looked at her with increasing scrutiny.

"None of them would dare."

"Oh?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

Jane understood the sentiment completely.

#fshenko #mass effect fancition #shenko #kaidan alenko #femshep x kaidan #take me home

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koltarmi · 4 years

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Accustomed to Your Presence - Chapter 2

Notes: Chapter 2 of my reed900 Jane Austen AU. Life has been crazy and for some reason, my draft deleted, so sorry for the delay! Once again, thanks to AJ in the Octopunk Media discord for beta-reading. Title is from Sense and Sensibility.

Read it here or on AO3

Summary: Gavin arrives at Hargrove House and meets the new neighbours.

Chapter 2: “It is not time or opportunity that is to determine intimacy; — it is disposition alone.”

Hargrove House is as imposing as he remembers it. The term house truly did not capture the air of grandioseness Gavin could feel suffocating him the moment the mansion came within his sight.

The doors to the rented coach are hardly open half an inch before he spots his aunt beaming at him.

“Gavin, you’ve become such a handsome man!” Lady Maria Kamski pulled him into a tight embrace.

He had wondered how long it would take before the ass-kissing began. It seemed his aunt was ready from the get go. Patting the older woman on the back, she finally let go when the young woman behind her spoke up.

“Mother, please contain yourself and release our dearest cousin. He did not survive Napoleon’s forces just to be suffocated by you.”

Ada, the bright-eyed and blonde-haired little girl he knew at 18, had grown up. She stood before them and the slightest smirk that graced her lips betrayed her otherwise stoic expression. From her dry tone, it was clear she had been instructed by her mother to be complimentary. Gavin, at the very least, could appreciate her subtlety when it came to the art of flattery.

“Let’s not stand here any longer,” Maria said. “I’ll call for some tea. We have so much to catch up on.”

As they were seated in the drawing room, Gavin realized their small party was missing a smug presence.

“Where’s Elijah?” he asked. “Don’t tell me he’s pacing in the study and having philosophical debates with himself again.”

Maria laughed as if he had told the funniest joke in the world. “Oh no,” she sighed, her face growing somber. “Since my dear Sir Henry passed, god bless his soul, Elijah has been so busy overseeing the transfer of everything. He’s currently on his way to Antigua to deal with some unpleasantness at the sugar plantations.”

He had been ready to give the older woman the benefit of the doubt. After all, he wasn’t the only victim of Sir Henry’s unruly temper, but Gavin’s jaw clenched tightly at her words.

He huffed as the tea was brought into the room. “Unpleasantness? That’s a funny way of saying people fighting against their forced enslavement.”

Maria froze as she stuttered to find the right words to say. “I...um…Well-”

“Ma’am, Lord Connor Stern and Doctor Stern are here,” Johnson, the butler, announced.

Pleased that she no longer had to explain herself, Maria rose as the footsteps of her two guests echoed through the foyer. “Oh, it seems with the excitement of your arrival, I completely forgot that we were expecting visitors. Gavin, I must introduce you to them.”

Following suit, Gavin stood up from his seat to greet his aunt’s stuffy rich friends. He was taken aback at first when he found himself looking at two identical young men. His aunt’s snobby friends were identical twins no less.

No, upon closer inspection while the two men had similar features there were slight subtleties Gavin noticed. The taller of the two brothers sported a stoic expression which only served to make his features look even more sharp and severe. In contrast, the shorter man possessed an air of levity apparent in the fine lines around his eyes and mouth that indicated he smiled often.

After Ada and Maria dipped into polite curtsies, Maria walked towards the men with a smile full of motherly affection on her face.

“Lord Stern and Doctor Stern. Lovely to see the both of you. You remember my daughter, Ada, of course?”

The shorter of the two men nodded and easily grinned back. “Yes, it’s a pleasure to see you and Mrs. Myers.”

It was only then that Gavin noticed the gold band on Ada’s ring finger.

“It’s my pleasure to introduce you to my dear nephew, Captain Gavin Reed. He’s just returned from the war and was gracious enough to grant us a visit.”

The shorter man stepped forward and approached to shake Gavin’s hand. “It’s very nice to meet you.”

The taller man also offered his hand. His piercing grey eyes reminded Gavin of terrible storms that had the power to destroy ships and throw men overboard. “Thank you for your service,” the taller man said, his voice was the slightest octave lower than his brother.

Suppressing a chill down his spine Gavin nodded and took a much needed step back. “It was my pleasure.”

“I was quite disheartened to hear the news of your mother’s passing. Amanda was a dear friend and she’ll be terribly missed,” Maria interjected. “How are you feeling, Lord Stern?”

The shorter man nodded, his smile transforming into a thin line. “It’s been hard on the both of us,” he replied, gesturing to his brother who stood beside him. “I’m sure you understand. I can’t imagine Sir Henry’s passing was easy to deal with. However, Mother wouldn’t want us to focus on such maudlin subjects, would she?”

“You’re quite right,” Maria agreed enthusiastically. “If you’re not in a rush, you should join us for tea.”

“We wouldn’t want to intrude,” replied the brother who had to be Doctor Stern.

“Nonsense! Sit down and I’ll call for more,” she said. She gestured for Lord Stern to sit down in the spot she previously occupied beside Ada as she moved to a chair. Meaning the only available spot for the doctor was beside Gavin.

The moment they sat down, Maria began peppering the two of them with a variety of questions ranging from the details of their lodgings in Hertfordshire to some bits of London gossip she had caught wisps of. As they continued chatting, Gavin lightly tapped his finger against the tea saucer to keep his restlessness at bay.

“Sorry to interrupt,” said Doctor Stern. “But I remember you mentioned having some magnolia trees planted in the garden. The weather is pleasant today and I would like to see the tree while they’re in full bloom.”

Given the opportunity to show off the lavish home, Maria Kamski’s face brightened suddenly. “What an excellent idea! I’m afraid you’ll have to go out without me. Too much sun gives me the most terrible headaches, but Ada will give you a wonderful tour of our grounds. Gavin, dear, your room will be ready by the time you come in if you want to rest or change before supper.”

“Will I be sleeping in the attic again? I think I left a book of mine up there.”

At the confused looks of the two brothers’ faces, Maria laughed nervously. “Oh, you’re so funny, Gavin. You’ll be staying in a guest room, of course.”

Putting on his most smug smile, Gavin replied, “Amazing what a title and money can get you.” Impatient to get outside, he walked towards the back doors that led to the garden.

He enjoyed the fresh air and warm afternoon sun for a few quiet moments before the rest joined him outside.

“The magnolia trees are further back in the gardens,” Ada said. “But we’ve made a few improvements here and there, if you would like to see them?”

While Doctor Stern nodded, Lord Stern replied with an eager grin, “Lead the way, Mrs. Myers.”

As Ada led them through the garden, Gavin fell several steps behind, taking the opportunity to stretch his limbs after the long carriage ride. However, Doctor Stern noticed his slow steps and slowed down himself to match Gavin’s pace. They walked silently side by side as the distance between them Ada and the other had widened considerably.

“I presume that you prefer the outdoors, Captain?” the doctor asked.

Gavin nodded. “I do. The only thing that can stop you out here are the elements.”

Looking ahead, he noticed Ada stumble, grabbing on to Lord Stern’s arm to steady herself.

“Your brother seems like a good person. He should be careful around Ada.”

A curious look appeared on the taller man’s face. “What should he be careful of?”

“Did you ever get the chance to to meet Sir Henry Kamski?” Gavin asked.

“No, I did not.”

“Be glad you didn’t. He was an unpleasant man with a hell of a temper,” Gavin said. “When I left Hargrove, Ada was five years old, but the way she holds herself and the look in her eyes; they all remind me of her father.”

“You’re quite observant and blunt,” Doctor Stern noted.

Gavin smirked and the doctor’s word choice. “I might have grown up with the Kamskis, but Sir Henry made it very clear I did not belong at Hargrove. Thought I was too outspoken and defiant,” he said, scratching at the scar on his nose.

“Since you’ve offered your honest opinion, may I be as bold to offer mine?”

Gavin nodded.

“I don’t know if you’re aware of the fact that Mrs. Meyers is widowed. It’s clear Mrs. Kamski wants her to remarry. When my brother and I first arrived, she was equally attentive to both of us, until she discovered Connor,” he gestured at his brother in front of him. “Is older than I and the heir to our father’s fortune.”

Gavin sighed as he processed the new information. “She is definitely her father’s daughter, calculating mind and all. Did she get your hopes up?”

Doctor Stern firmly shook his head. “No, not at all. I am a bachelor of my own volition.”

“No one has ever caught your eye before?”

“I’ve met plenty of pleasant and attractive people,” the doctor said. “None of which I could connect to on an intellectual and emotional level.”

As the magnolia trees came into their view, Doctor Stern paused in his steps, glancing at Ada and Connor in the distance.

“Society dictates that we have to be the most amiable versions of ourselves, which is quite frankly something I find draining. I want to thank you for our conversation, Captain Reed,” he said. “It was quite…refreshing. However, I think we should take your advice and catch up with my brother and your cousin.”

Gavin chuckled. He never thought he would be thanked for his lack of propriety.

“Anytime,” he replied.

#deartfest #reed900 #my writing #gavin reed #rk900 #dbh #detroit evolution #octopunk media

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prettywordsyouleft · 6 years

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Beyond The Palace Walls - Part Six

Genre: royal au / fluff / adventure / self-growth

Characters: Jung Jaehyun x reader (feat. Ten, Lucas and Taeyong)

A/N: This story was started as a request but it didn’t suit the idol I was writing it for and it was too good to scrap. Originally, it was going to be a Lucas fiction but then I realised I was writing Jaehyun without realising it and so my bias one of them won it out.

Index: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | Epilogue

The steady rhythm of the horse’s movement had settled some of your anxiety as it thundered along the path ahead. Although you had a lot to consider during the ride, you had to admit you were impressed with Jaehyun’s skills at knowing how to understand and encourage the majestic animal. You had often gone to the royal stables until you fell off one summer and your father put an end to your riding lessons. You enjoyed the rush of being back up in the saddle, in the adept care of Jaehyun as he and the bay horse navigated the twists and turns of the forest. It felt like the trees would go on forever, the greenery encasing you both in an endless world of fauna. After some time, the dense forest started to change. You noticed the trees were not as grouped together, and light filtered in, changing the deep hues of green into lighter shades, some sun-bleached with the way the light directly hit them. It was then that you smelt the difference in the air as well. It had a distinct saltiness that you were certain you could taste whenever you opened your mouth in wonder. It made you scrunch up your face and Jaehyun chuckled for the first time since you departed from the others. It was the first sign of anything towards you; the only sounds coming from the man that firmly kept you in place were to encourage the horse forward until now. His chuckle comforted you and you smiled, relaxing further into his embrace. You had missed him even though he had been behind you this whole time.

“It’s not far now.”

The track twisted once more and you gasped, seeing the vast blue up ahead. Your eyes soaked it in as it grew closer, and soon the trees disappeared as the ground turned to sand. Jaehyun slowed the horse down to a trot and then a walk, the three of you advancing towards the water at a leisured pace. Despite the race to get here, the calmness of your arrival made you forget about everything that had happened today. The waves rolled into the beachfront and then back out again, and you watched as some crashed against the others back further into the sea, yet as they reached the sandy shore it was gentler. The ocean was everything you had imagined it to be and more.

The horse halted and you glanced back at Jaehyun, his focus solely on yours. He smiled. “You’re finally here.”

“It’s beautiful,” you breathed and Jaehyun nodded, letting go of the arm he held around your waist. You realised then how tense your body felt and you glanced down at the ground, noticing Jaehyun shift his foot out of the stirrup at the same time. With help from him and the stirrup you made it down onto the ground and wobbled a little when it moved under you. You shot Jaehyun a grin and then stepped forward. It wasn’t the kind of sand you had ever experienced before. They were firmer, filled with fine gravel. This was soft and you sunk a little into it, watching as the grainy coloured beads encased your steps. It was delightful.

Jaehyun soon dismounted and led the horse to a nearby piece of driftwood, tethering it there before he came back to your side and grabbed your hand. You looked up at him expectantly.

“You need to take off your shoes for this,” he encouraged, allowing you to use him to balance on as you did so. Once his own boots were off, you set off towards the water, surprised when the damp sand changed from what you had been feeling run through your toes. This sand stuck to you as you walked along, and soon the water was right ahead of you. It felt childish, but you glanced up at Jaehyun to gauge his reaction. Would the sea be safe to step into? You had watched it roll in and out over the sand just ahead. Would you float out with it if you stepped in? Part of you wanted to, just so you could feel as free as the water was. You were reminded of Taeyong’s talk the other day about water, and how it moved around its obstacles. You decided, along with Jaehyun’s encouraging nod, that it would be safe to step forward.

Gripping onto his hand you edged forward, placing only the tip of your toes in. You gasped, feeling the gentle flow of the water. Soon, your whole foot was down, and you moved forward a few more steps after hiking up your skirt. A giggle left you as you jumped over a wave rolling in. Jaehyun’s hand left yours as you continued to play, the man watching you from his spot in the water near you, laughing at how innocent your play was. The water’s temperature was refreshing and you enjoyed the chill of it against your legs the longer you splashed around.

And then you got water into your mouth by accident, spluttering with how strong it tasted. Jaehyun genuinely laughed at you and you pouted, splashing water at him and listened to him gasp. You laughed heartily.

“Did you just splash me?” he asked, brushing the water off of his clothes. You smirked and threw another handful of water his way. Jaehyun groaned before skimming a bunch back at you. Your shrieks were noisy and your laughter was louder. You hadn’t played like this before in your life. You had never been allowed in water for long in case you drowned, and the one time Jane had splashed you in the bathtub as children, she was deeply scolded and you never shared again. You were transported to a place where your lost childhood was discovered, playing with Jaehyun until you were exhausted and soaking wet.

As you sat down on the sand in the sun to dry off, you started to wonder of the others. Were they okay? The chase for you both had clearly been led away from here, or else the guards would have stumbled across you both by now. You felt safe on this section of the beach but you worried if the others were. You were desperate to see them when dusk arrived. You wanted to share this magical environment with Jane, to hear her exclamations of such a beautiful place on Earth.

You missed Jane terribly.

“They’ll be okay.” Glancing over at Jaehyun then, he smiled gently and took your hand in his. “They promised they would come here. I believe they will.”

“Shouldn’t they be here by now though?” you asked hesitantly, leaning into his side. Jaehyun sighed. “What if-”

“I don’t think they would want you to worry, little bird.”

You smiled. “I half expected you to call me Princess then. I don’t know why.”

“I thought we agreed on little bird?”

“I feel like a lot has changed,” you admitted softly and Jaehyun didn’t respond. You looked over at his eyes, trying to decipher the expression within his gaze. His jaw was tight, and you reached over to touch him, gently caressing his cheek. “This beach feels like an escape from everything that’s happening.”

“Our own little world,” he agreed with a smile, turning to kiss your hand lightly before grabbing it in his spare hand. You sat for some time like that, feeling the warmth of both his hands around yours and watching the sun leave the sky altogether as the first twinkling stars appeared above. In any other situation, this moment would be the best time to kiss Jaehyun. To get wrapped up in your feelings that you now carried deep within your heart and to utter magical words that you hoped were caught on a shooting star.

But it was growing colder, darker. You couldn’t forget about Jane and the others no matter how much you tried. Even with his warmth, Jaehyun couldn’t keep you from shivering and soon you grew panicked. Any sound that happened around you made you flinch and you were on edge, no longer enjoying the beach.

“Should we search for them?” you asked and Jaehyun shook his head, his eyes wandering the place you were in. There wasn’t a soul in sight apart from you both and the horse he had since tethered near a patch of grass. But his eyes caught something and he let go of one of your hands, getting you both up before pointing.

“Let’s set up camp there. I can’t let you catch a cold with all your shivering.”

There was a cove nearby that blocked out some of the wind, and you helped Jaehyun gather bits of driftwood into a pile near the entrance of it. He set to work at lighting the fire, satisfied when it took. You resumed your seated position again, Jaehyun soon joining you when he was certain the fire would continue growing.

“Tell me something about you,” you asked, resting your head on your knees as you brought them up against yourself. You realised you didn’t know that much about Jaehyun yet. You knew of his character and his love for his friends, but that was it. You craved more knowledge; you wanted to know everything about the man who held onto your heart.

“What do you want to know?”

“Anything.”

Jaehyun was thoughtful for a moment and then nodded as an opening. “I have two older brothers and three younger sisters.”

“That’s a big family,” you said and Jaehyun nodded again. “Are you close with them all? I’m an only child so I don’t have any understanding of what it’s like to have siblings.”

“Mine… they live for themselves,” he slowly answered, turning somewhat broody. Had you asked the wrong question? You watched as he internalised over his memories perhaps, and then he looked at you. “My older brothers disliked me because like you, my Father favoured me.”

“He didn’t keep you locked up in a castle though,” you pointed out but instead of laughing as you expected, Jaehyun shrugged.

“It felt suffocating regardless.”

“I see.”

“My sisters didn’t really care for me because I was always off getting training of some sort.” Jaehyun stopped there, rocking in his thoughts for a moment. You bit your lip, wincing at your suggestion to ask about his life. Despite his hesitance, he seemed to want to tell you and you waited until he spoke again. “Eventually, I chose to leave which didn’t go down well with my Father.”

“Is that when you met Taeyong?”

He finally smiled and shook his head. “I’ve known him for many years, he helped me leave.”

“And Ten, Lucas?”

“I knew them as well,” he told you, his smile growing. “They were the only people I felt who cared to know the real me. They weren’t looking for something out of me other than friendship. It’s been, wow, three years now, since I left.”

“Why are you returning?” The question felt greedy to you. Logically, if he was happier away from home, you wanted Jaehyun to continue on that path. But there was a personal aspect to the question. You didn’t want him to return. It would mean that when you finally went home yourself, he would be in an entirely different kingdom. You didn’t like that. You didn’t want any further distance between you than the one you held now.

“My Father is ill,” he started and your eyes widened. “I thought I would see him before I can’t.”

“Oh my, Jaehyun I’m so sorry for-”

“I’m not,” he cut in, smiling again. He took your hand in his and smiled. “I’m glad I met you. If it wasn’t for you, I’d be returning home and taking up the role I don’t want to.”

“What role is that?”

Jaehyun paused, his eyes unsure. And then he frowned, tilting his head to the side. He was up in an instant. “Stay here.”

You bit back your protest, watching him head out silently to check if you were still safe here. When he returned, he wasn’t alone.

“Jane!” you cried, leaping up and running to your best friend’s side who cried in relief upon seeing you. Her tears mixed in with your own as you clung to one another.

“I thought I would never see you again!”

“Nonsense, you know you can never get rid of me that easily,” you remarked, smiling widely at your friend. You glanced over at the others. Ten winked as he came to Jane’s side and Lucas covered you in one of his bear-like hugs. You watched Taeyong examine Jaehyun avidly before they both relaxed and brotherly hugged.

You realised it then.

When you woke in the morning, you were nestled beside Jane sleeping peacefully. The cove was quiet apart from the sounds of steady breathing and you eased yourself up slowly, heading out onto the beachfront. You walked for some time, watching as the sun rose up in the sky. You loved this part of the day the most. When you returned to the palace you would be certain to witness many sunrises there.

You gazed at the morning waves crashing into the shore with more force than they had yesterday and grew mesmerised by their beauty. Water truly was something you now held great respect for.

You noticed a person up ahead and you approached him quietly, Taeyong’s eyes shifting from the sea when he noticed you. He didn’t smile but welcomed you at his side. “Good morning.”

“Did you not sleep well?” you asked, your own eyes moving over him. He had limped in last night and you wondered what had happened to cause him to be injured. He became aware of your examination and finally smiled.

“You’re just like him.”

“In more ways than one,” you agreed, and the older man’s gaze snapped to scrutinise you. He sighed heavily in resignation.

“He wouldn’t tell you,” he mentioned and you nodded.

“He didn’t.”

“How did you figure it out then?”

You didn’t know how to answer the question at first. Now that you understood who Jaehyun was, you felt as if you knew it all along. How you had foolishly viewed him in the beginning and how lovingly Marigold had appreciated him at your side. He was your saviour, but you were starting to wonder if you would become his as well.

“I feel like the tail of the secret was exposed to me long ago, but I only caught hold of it last night.”

Taeyong smiled again. “I was harsh with him. And you, too.”

“You are someone who guides people well in life, Taeyong. I don’t see you as harsh at all.”

“I do?”

You nodded. “You helped Jaehyun escape, to live a life he dreamed of, right?”

“Being cooped up never suited him.”

“Did he escape the way I did?” you wondered and Taeyong shook his head.

“No, he told his Father the truth. That he couldn’t stand living there any longer and craved to see more of the world.” Taeyong sat down then, and you followed suit, tucking your legs up under yourself. “His Father told him he had too many responsibilities to be so reckless. Jaehyun refused to believe that his life only meant one thing. He told him to let him go and he would return one day with the knowledge of the land. Eventually, his Father agreed.”

You nodded, smiling at how admirable Jaehyun was. You now wished you had understood your yearning to leave and prepared in a better way.

“He was meant to be only gone for a year. Soon that turned into another as we helped the people of the land. Then when Lucas’ sister was kidnapped, we ended up here.”

“His sister?” you repeated and Taeyong nodded. “Where is she?”

“She married a man in the village you live above. She’s very happy there.”

“Were you happy there too?” you asked hesitantly, watching him for his reaction.

Taeyong smiled sadly. “I never let myself grow fond of a place for too long, knowing my destination is back in our kingdom.”

“I see.”

“Will you return home soon?” He turned to face you, now watching you like you had him. You heaved a deep breath.

“I should.”

“I think he is in love with you,” Taeyong mentioned softly and you couldn’t help but feel your heart flutter. “Jaehyun has risked everything for you. I wonder just how far he’ll go.”

“He is destined to sit on the throne though,” you said, finally mentioning the unspoken secret aloud. It felt good to say it, to acknowledge Jaehyun as the missing Prince from the neighbouring kingdom you had heard of at the dinner table once from your Father. You wondered if Jaehyun would feel the burden of your knowledge and wish you had remained oblivious to his own status.

Taeyong nodded sadly. “His brother wants it more than he does.”

“Then perhaps we can let him,” you mused, smiling over at Taeyong. For a moment, he was still and then a smile soon stretched over his lips to match yours.

It was your turn to save Jaehyun.

_________________

Part 7

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yurtletheturtlehenderson · 6 years

Text

S.T REWRITE - S1:E6; Chapter Six, The Monster - [Pt. 2]

A Will Byers x Reader Series

With Eleven gone, Y/n and Dustin struggle to keep the party together. Elsewhere, Hopper and Joyce uncover the truth about the lab’s many experiments.

||3rd Person POV||

Joyce and Hopper stood shivering in the cold autumn air. They were currently waiting on the front porch of what they hoped to be the home of Terry Ives. The woman they believed could answer all their burning questions on the many mysteries surrounding Hawkins.

They heard the faint sound of footsteps and when they looked up, they saw a woman peeking through the curtains of the glass on the door. She released the cloth curtains and she unlocked the door before opening it.

"Can I help you?" She asked, a weary look on her face.

"Hi, we're looking for Terry Ives. Does she live here?" Hopper asked.

A slight frown crossed her face as she crossed her arms, leaning against the door frame. "Who's asking?"

"Hawkins Chief of Police." Hopper stated, pulling out his badge and showing it to the woman.

"And you want to talk to my sister?" She asked wearily.

"Well, if your sister's Terry Ives, then, yeah we do."

The woman looked down at her feet contemplating this before speaking.

"Okay, well, you can come in but if you want Terry to tell you anything, you're about five years too late." She said turning and walking into the house, leaving the door open for her new guest to follow her.

As the duo followed the woman further into the house and what appeared to be the living room, they took note of the TV playing softly from the room.

"Terry, you have some visitors."

As she spoke she stepped aside as Joyce and Hopper timidly stepped into the room to find a woman in a rocking chair. She remained stiff, her arms still on the arms of the chair and she slowly turned her head, her face never changing. Her eyes were distant and she appeared disconnected from the world.

Joyce spoke up, taking a few cautious steps forward.

"Hello. My name's Joyce Byers. Uh, this is Hopper," she gestured to the man behind her. "We drove over from Hawkins."

The woman never moved, never blinked, but her gaze remained on Joyce.

"Um, you see, uh, my son... He's been missing for over a week now," Joyce continued. "and, um, we were wondering if we could talk to you about your daughter, Jane?" Joyce asked carefully.

"If there's anything that you could tell us about when she was taken..."

The woman closed her eyes for a moment before opening them, clearly pained at the mention of her missing daughter. Yet she remained silent and Hopper spoke up.

"What was your relationship with Dr. Brenner? You guys keep in touch?"

Again, they were met with silence and an empty stare. Joyce took this as an opportunity to step forward and offer the picture of her missing son.

"This is, uh... this is him. This is Will. Uh, you may have seen him on... on the news."

Terry only looked at the missing poster for a moment before returning her gaze to the TV, all the while Hopper staring confusedly at the exchange.

"What's wrong with her?"

The other Ives sister stood shaking her head and shrugged her shoulders.

"I told you, you're wasting your time."

||Reader's POV||

'This isn't right. Lucas should be with us.'

In that moment my brother seems to read my mind.

"This is weird without Lucas."

The three of us were biking across town. We figured we would most likely find El somewhere around Mirkwood so that's where we are headed now.

Dustin and Mike were behind me. The two were keeping up a conversation as we all kept a steady but comfortable pace. I wasn't in the most chatty mood at the moment. I was currently trying to concentrate my nerves into the task at hand and keep moving forward, making sure not to lose the boys of course.

Thankfully, the two of them seemed to understand I needed my space at the moment.

"He should've shaken my hand." I hear Mike say.

"He's just jealous."

"What are you talking about?"

I hear my brother sigh before speaking.

"Sometimes, your total obliviousness just blows my mind."

There's a small pause before he continues.

"He's your best friend, right?"

"Yeah... I mean, I don't know."

"It's fine. I get it."

"We didn't get here until the fourth grade. He had the advantage of living next door. But none of that matters. What matters is that he is your best friend. And then this girl shows up and starts living in your basement and all you ever want to do I'd pay attention to her."

"That's not true."

"Yes, it is. And you know it. And he knows it. But no one ever says anything until you both start punching and yelling at each other like goblins with intelligence scores of zero."

I can't help but smile and roll my eyes slightly.

"Now everything's weird." He finished.

"He's not my best friend."

I hear Dustin laugh.

"Yeah, right."

"I mean, he is, but so are you guys. And so is Will."

"Can't have more than one best friend." Dustin stated almost sadly.

"Says who?"

"Says logic."

"Well, I call bull on your logic, because you're my best friend, too. That includes you, [Y/N]."

I spare a moment to look over my shoulder and make eye contact with him. I give a warm smile.

"Thanks, Mikey. I know I speak for Dustin as well when I say that you mean a lot to us." I look to my brother and we seem to silently agree with one another.

I make sure to keep an eye on the road as I bike forward, occasionally making eye contact with him as I speak. "And I promise, we are gonna find El, and then we are gonna talk some sense into Lucas. Cause I'll be damned if I lose another one of my boys."

The three of us smile at each other and I return my attention to the road. For one brief moment in time we feel almost... at peace. It's only been a week since Will's disappearance, but it's felt like years. It's refreshing, for once, even if it's only for a few short moments, we are just three kids without a care in the world. Of course, deep down, we know that is far from the truth.

The looming sense of stress and concern is only confirmed when we find ourselves across the street from Bradley's Big Buy convenience store.

I slam on the brakes and my tires squeal against the pavement when I spot the commotion outside the store. Mike and Dustin brake on either side of me.

"Woah." Mike breathes.

By the looks of it, it was robbed. But everybody seemed to be fine. The only evidence of a robbery was the shattered glass of the closed automatic doors and the policemen taking statements form witnesses of course.

"You don't think..." Dustin begins.

"Uh... definitely."

Unlike me, the boys are eager enough to trek on and they simultaneously start back on the road. I took a minute to catch my breath staring lost in thought.

Knowing I better catch up now, I stand up, propping my weight on each of the peddles of my bike and begin peddling, easily catching up to boys.

However, I can't seem to shake the feeling that I was being watched at this very moment.

+++++

Tag List: @fuckwaad @aimee-lucass

DM me if you want to be added!

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wonderfulworldofmichaelford · 5 years

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Michael In the Mainstream - Avengers: Endgame

Endgame is a film that is really more than a film. This is a cultural milestone. This is the culmination of a decade’s worth of stories told by all sorts of different creative minds, a set of stories that all managed to have consistent character growth and development, a grand finale to ten years with all sorts of beloved and iconic characters. This film is the twilight of the age of Steve Rogers and Tony Stark, and the dawn of a new era of fresh heroes, heroes whose stories we’ve only begun to experience. This is something that has never been done before, a massive storyline told throughout twenty plus films coming together in a big shared universe to deliver an awesome, climactic final confrontation between characters we know and love and a villain we love to hate. There’s never really been a film of this magnitude before.

I have loved the MCU since it began when I was a teenager. I had just started high school when Iron Man first came out, and it just amazed me how good it was. Unlike the year’s other superhero film, which was based on one of the Big Three of Marvel’s Distinguished Competition, I didn’t really have any sort of huge expectations for Iron Man. Like sure, I was aware of who he was, I knew he was a classic Marvel comic character, but he wasn’t Spider-Man or the X-Men, the characters I grew up watching in cartoons and who I was intimately familiar with. Hell, I even knew the Hulk better than Iron Man. But boy, did that change fast; Robert Downey Jr.’s incredible performance, the fun writing, the gripping character study, and the solid action all got me interested in this washed up B-list hero who had spent the most recent arc of his comics becoming the superhero version of Hitler.

And that was a running theme for the MCU. I ever cared too much about characters like Captain America, Thor, Ant-Man, or Black Panther when I was younger, and I didn’t even know characters like the Guardians of the Galaxy were a thing. All of this was just beyond my knowledge. And yet, these films made me care about these characters, got me invested in them. It’s something that with a few rare exceptions the X-Men films completely failed to do. I honestly can say after all is said and done I love Iron Man, Captain America, and the Guardians way more than I do Cyclops, Jean Grey, and Storm, which is not something I would have ever guessed I’d say a decade ago. And growing up with all these characters and seeing them go through these films, going into this one I knew there had to be some big dramatic payoff, some sense of finality. You can pull of stuff like massive retcons and everyone coming back from the dead in comics, but in movies? That’s how you lose viewers. I knew they’d really have to blow our minds with this, especially after the brutal gut punch that was Infinity War.

And for the most part, they truly delivered.

Endgame is a satisfying conclusion to the epic first decade of the MCU, closing the doors on some stories but opening up a world of possibilities on others. And while there are some problems here and there, the overall product is just so good that it’s easy to forgive the flaws, though it is easy to see why some would be a bit less forgiving. Still, even more critical folk than me admit that regardless of problems this is still a good movie.

This movie has three acts, and I will be going over each individually. There are going to be SPOILERS here, because there is just so much to unpack with this film, so consider this your warning. Again, SPOILERS BELOW.

The first act picks up where the Avengers were left at the end of Infinity War: broken, defeated, and desperate. Despite Carol saving Tony and Nebula from deep space, things seem pretty hopeless, until an energy signature is picked up revealing the whereabouts of Thanos. The Avengers rush to confront him, eager to steal back the Stones and right what went wrong… but upon arriving, they find Thanos broken, scarred, and worst of all, utterly without the Stones. He destroyed them all so his work could not be undone. He has completely, irreversibly won. And so when Thor brings Stormbreaker down and cuts off his head only a short while into the film, it does not feel triumphant or thrilling. It feel sad, miserable, and bitter.

I think this is probably one of the better twists in the first act. The pace at the beginning is rather slow until they confront Thanos, and it ultimately works in the movie’s favor as it makes the horrific revelation hurt all the more, and then following it up with a time skip of five years later is just rubbing salt in the wound. It also helps cement the original Thanos as a truly unique villain. He not only won, but he died knowing he won. He was victorious in death for five years, and there was nothing any of the heroes could do about it. It seems a bit anti-climactic when you first think about it, but really this end to the original Thanos is a rather fitting conclusion of his character arc from Infinity War. He won, he watched the sun rise on the universe… what more could this Thanos really do?

The time skip shows what all the heroes have been up to in the interim: Steve is running support groups for survivors, Tony has married Pepper and has a daughter, Natasha has been in contact with the remaining heroes, Clint has been out brutally murdering criminals as Ronin, Banner has managed to keep his intellect as Hulk and become a relatively famous figure, and Thor has basically become an obese drunkard wallowing in his failure. Our heroes are at their absolute lowest point… until one little rat walks over a control panel on a van in a storage unit and frees Scott “Ant-Man” Lang from the Quantum Realm.

I will say that a lot of the latter half of the first act, the part that sets up the “Time Heist” of the second act, drags on a bit, and this is really the portion of the film that will make or break it for you. You need to really be invested in these characters, you need to be ready to handle the ways they’ve dealt with the knowledge that they have lost. Thor’s fate especially has been contentious, with people crying foul that throughout the movie the Russos did nothing but “undo” all the development Taika Waititi gave him, which is quite frankly such a stupid argument it’s not worth addressing. What IS worth addressing is how Thor’s trauma, unlike most of the other Avengers, is played for laughs. For some, seeing Thor as a fat, slovenly drunkard is going to be a bit upsetting and tasteless; for others, the black comedy will cross the line twice and make it rather funny. That aspect is definitely going to help or hinder your enjoyment of this segment.

Even that aside, it does really feel like it takes a while to get to the real fun part of the movie, though it’s not as if anything in the first act is truly bad, per se; it’s just very character-driven as opposed to exciting and thrilling. If you’re into character-driven drama, then you’ll really dig this, since all of the performances here are excellent, with Paul Rudd in particular really showing off some impressive range and Scarlett Johansson actually managing to impress me with her emotional performance. Seeing Hawkeye become a complete and total badass who slaughters his way through thugs is also a refreshing change from the absolute joke he has been in previous films, and his winning streak in act one is happily carried throughout the film, completely redeeming Hawkeye. There’s also a lot of good comedy here as it builds up into the time heist, particularly Rhodey’s suggestion of what to do with baby Thanos or the ill-fated test run of the time machine.

I think it is important to note that unlike most films that deal with the subject, the movie actually gives clear, definitive rules on time travel: you can’t go back to the past and alter your present, any changes you make only succeed in creating a split timeline resulting in an alternate universe. This does not allow them to go back and kill Thanos before the Snap, but it DOES allow them to go back to times when they could reasonably steal the Infinity Stones and use them to undo the damage done. This is actually a pretty solid take on time travel and an easy take to grasp at that, though as I will mention later, this simple and clearly explained version of time travel has somehow left people confused. But I’m getting ahead of myself.

Act two is where the movie really picks up steam, as the remaining heroes split into groups and head back to points in time where they get to experience moments from beloved Marvel films (and Thor: The Dark World) as they retrieve the Stones. Cap, Tony, and Ant-Man go after Loki’s scepter and the Tesserect following the battle of New York as seen in The Avengers, which leads to a lot of hilarity including Cap fighting his past self and an elevator scene that not only calls back to the one from The Winter Soldier but also features the redemption of one of the most awful moments in modern comics with one of the single funniest lines in the entire film; Hulk wanders over to the Sanctum Sanctorum and argues with the Ancient One for the Stone in the Eye of Agamotto; Rocket and Thor go back to the period of time where Jane Foster was at Asgard to steal the Reality Stone from inside her, which leads to Thor getting a touching reunion with his mother as well as an opportunity to snag Mjolnir; Nebula and Rhodey get to go to the opening of Guardians of the Galaxy and witness Peter Quill dancing and singing to himself like a moron before knocking him out and stealing the Stone; and Black Widow and Hawkeye go to Vormir to confront the Red Skull for the Soul Stone. I’m sure you can imagine how that one goes.

This part of the movie is a lot more fun with how varied it gets. There’s plenty of comedy, action, and character moments, and it just feels a lot more fun than the first act. Seeing how characters that rarely interacted or even never interacted in the past bounce off each other is really delightful, particularly Rhodey and Nebula. Of course, there is also great moments of development, such as when Steve and Tony botch their initial Stone theft and have to go back even further in time, which leads to Tony getting a heartwarming moment with his father while Steve is reminded of Peggy. And then, of course, there is Black Widow and her character arc coming to a close, as she heroically mirrors Gamora’s tragic fate.

There has, of course, been a lot of argument over Black Widow’s fate here. Here’s my take on it: Black Widow’s character arc throughtout the films has always been a desire to scrub the red from her ledger and find some meaning to her life. Age of Ultron, for all its flaws, shows she thinks of herself as a monster, and truly just wants to make a connection, find a group she has something in common with. With the Avengers, she found just that, she found the family she never had, she found something worth living for, fighting for, and ultimately dying for. Her sacrifice wasn’t some sad attempt at shock, it wasn’t her being stuffed in the fridge to further the character arcs of her male costars, it was her character arc becoming fully realized, it was her understanding that to save those she loved she had to make a choice, and it is the most utterly selfless and heroic act in the entire movie, and maybe even the entire franchise. Everyone would have lost if not for Natasha. She is probably the most heroic character in the movie… well, with one exception, but we’ll get to him shortly. The point is, her sacrifice carried more dramatic and thematic weight than if Clint had sacrificed himself; Clint is very much an underrealized and underutilized character, and while this movie improved him, it was still not enough to make his sacrifice as painful as Black Widow’s.

Act two comes to a close with heroes grieving Black Widow and preparing the Stones for a Snap to bring everyone back… unfortunately, they don’t realize there is a traitor in their midst: Nebula. Not out Nebula, but Nebula from 2014, prior to her character development. You see, Thanos could still access the future Nebula’s video recording eye since her software is still on the same server even in the future (it’s a bit weird but it still makes a bit of sense). 2014 Thanos finds out about his future self’s victory and becomes furious that any would try and undo his “mercy.” And so he enacts a plan to get him to this future and kill the Avengers once and for all. The evil Nebula bringing her father and his fleet to the future right after the second snap kicks off the third act, as Thanos obliterates the Avenger’s mansion with his ship.

The third act, the entire third act, is just peak MCU. The entire act from start to finish is the absolute best the franchise has to offer. It all begins with the heroes struggling to regroup and find each other in the wreckage, with Hawkeye having to run from aliens in a dark basement, Hulk having to hold up rubble to help save Rhodey and Rocket, Nebula helping sway 2014 Gamora to her side and then in the ultimate act of “God I really hate how I used to be” shooting her past self to death, Ant-Man rushing to save his friends after escaping the blast, and Cap, Thor, and Iron Man going to fight Thanos. This is the beginning of the end.

It is interesting to note that here, Thanos is a lot closer to the megalomaniac tyrant he was in the comics while still staying in line with his movie version from the previous film. It does go to show how fragile his ego is and how his talk of his work being merciful and good is just a delusion he has bought into; he freely admits here that he should not have been so kind, he blames everyone else for his failure, and he promises to remake the universe in his image, perfectly balanced and unaware of all they lost. Despite being almost an entire reversal of his previous characterization, it actually functions quite while as a weird way of continuing his arc while at the same time addressing the criticisms many leveled at the anti-villainous Thanos of Infinity War. It definitely looks like the Russos were well aware of how Thanos would be perceived, and did a really great job at having the best of both worlds in regards to his characterization. And even here, where he is fully embracing his villainy and saying how he will enjoy crushing his foes, one still gets the sense that he still sees himself as the hero in his mind and is absolutely furious that anyone would wish to undo what he considers a kindness.

Of course, the battle with these three fighting Thanos is quite enjoyable, and showcases even without his Gauntlet Thanos is a force to be reckoned with, as he trounces the three Avengers, though not without great effort… especially after Steve Rogers does something we’ve all been waiting a long time to see him do: pick up Mjolnir and wield it in battle. I think it’s safe to say that Thor’s jubilant shout of “I KNEW IT!” is one that was echoed in the minds of every single viewer of the scene. And just when you think the movie couldn’t get even more epic, just when it seems that Thanos will win as a bruised and bettered Steve stands alone against Thanos and his entire army… Steve gets a call.

“On your left.”

Hundreds of magic portals open, and the resurrected heroes all come through, along with any sort of crew they could bring. For the record, this is: Black Panther, Shuri, Okoye, M’Baku, the armies of Wakanda, Doctor Strange, Wong, all of the wizards, Spider-Man, Star-Lord, Drax, Mantis, Groot, Falcon, Bucky, Scarlet Witch, Valkyrie, Korg, Miek, the remaining Asgardians, Wasp, Pepper Potts in her Rescue armor, Kraglin, his Ravager crew, and even Howard the Duck. And if that’s not enough for you, the Avengers who were still alive before the attack all come in for the battle. And they said Super Smash Bros. Ultimate was the most ambitious crossover of all time. Was Howard the Duck in Smash? I think not.

And as the heroes gather for the inevitable charge, do you know what Steve says? He says two little words that fans have been waiting for such a long time to hear him say, something a less talented writer and director teased us with several films ago:

“AVENGERS… ASSEMBLE!”

Hurry quick and wipe those tears from your eyes so you don’t miss the awesome final battle, which is just filled to the brim with moments where every single hero gets to shine. Highlights include Spidey and Tony reuniting, Spidey activating the “Instant Kill” function of his suit, Gamora kicking Star-Lord in the balls, Tony and Pepper fighting back to back, Scarlet Witch confronting Thanos, and the awesomely cheesy “GIRL POWER” moment that is far more empowering than the entirety of Captain Marvel. Everything about this battle is fantastic, everything about it is peak MCU, everything is the epitome of why people love superhero movies… and it all culminates with the conclusion of Tony Stark’s decade-long character arc, as he steals the Stones from Thanos and snaps his fingers, erasing Thanos and his army at the cost of his life.

This moment is depressing on two fronts. On one, there is Tony. He is the hero we have spent the most time with, the one we know the best. And after all these films, he finally proved Steve Rogers wrong: he was able to lay his life on the line for the greater good, sacrificing himself fully for his wife, his daughter, his friends, and the entire universe. Tony went from a self-absorbed egomaniac arms dealer to a truly great, heroic figure who did what he had to do to protect everyone he cared about.

But on the other is Thanos. Most villains, upon seeing their plans come to ruin and their armies laid to waste, would break down, rant, offer some sort of last taunt… but not Thanos. Thanos accepts his death, however much it pains him to. The look of exhaustion, anguish, and utter hopelessness on his face as he sits down in a dark mirror of the ending of Infinity War truly cements him as a great and worthy foe. For all his faults, for all his insanity, Thanos was still a man utterly deluded by his pain and past tragedies into believing his cause was noble and just, and here he sits in his final moments perhaps wondering as his future self did if it was really all worth it. His crumbling to dust as he so cruelly did to so many others I well-deserved and a fitting end for one such as him, but there’s no denying that there is an element of tragedy to it too. It’s the exact sort of emotional ending I would have hoped for from Marvel’s greatest villain.

The finale wraps things up with Tony’s funeral, as well as Cap going back in time to return the Stones and Mjolnir to the moments they were stolen so that the alternate timelines can handle themselves. But Steve decides to create his own alternate timeline before coming home, and lives out an entire lifetime with an alternate Peggy Carter before returning to his own time and passing his shield and title on to Falcon. Many were confused as to if this meant Steve changed the canon of the MCU, but… they explain what happens in the movie. Quite a few times in fact. If you paid attention at all, you would know it is not possible for him to alter the canon. He created an alternate timeline where he presumably lived a full, happy life and ensured things would go well for everyone. No Hydra infiltration of SHIELD, no Winter Soldier, no Stark assassination, none of that. Just a long, happy life with the woman he loved, his best friend, and a well-deserved retirement from the fields of battle in the end. While the conclusion to Cap’s arc is not quite as good as Tony’s, it’s still heartfelt and touching, and it’s hard to say he didn’t deserve a happy life after everything he went through.

And so ends the Infinity Saga, and the first ten years of the MCU. This movie changed a hell of a lot, to the point where even though only two main heroes died over the course of the film, things still will never be the same going forward, and I like that a lot. Unlike every other cinematic universe that has sprung up in the wake of the MCU, I fully feel like any stories told after this one will continue to build off the foundations that this film and its predecessors laid out. There won’t be the need for soft rebooting like with the DCEU, or with actual rebooting like Dark Universe, or just constant messy and confusing timelines like with the X-Men Series. The MCU has managed to remain remarkably consistent throughout, and there’s no reason to doubt they’d continue that into the future. There’s no stinger here, but the moments after the final battle with the Guardians and Thor certainly set up interesting possibilities, as does the now teenaged Cassie Lang, who may well take up the superhero role she has in the comics. It’s hard to predict where the future of the MCU will be going right now, but all things considered it certainly looks bright.

Ultimately, this movie is a love letter. It’s a slow build that starts by examining the characters we know and love at their lowest, builds into a nostalgic and hilarious trip down memory lane, and culminates in the most beautiful sort of fanservice imaginable that then brings a touching conclusion to two of the greatest heroes in all of cinema. Of course, as I’ve mentioned, that first act is going to be what makes or breaks this for some people, and the part does drag a bit, but ultimately this movie is more what it ends up as than what it starts out as. That finale is the single greatest work of art the MCU has produced thus far, and I’m not sure that even with another ten years they’ll ever be able to top it.

The amazing thing is, this movie is pretty accessible even if you aren’t a hardcore fan, though it’s definitely only going to have full emotional impact if you’ve been watching these characters for years. This is a movie for the fans first and foremost, and that’s really not a bad thing; why wouldn’t you make an epic finale to so many arcs that appeals to the people who invested so much time in it? As someone who grew up with the MCU, who has watched it grow and blossom into everything I ever dreamed of seeing as a kid, I only have this to say to all of the directors, writers, actors, stunt people, just everyone who made this and all the other films possible, and to the dearly departed Stan Lee who created so many of these people I’ve spent the past decade watching come to life on screen:

I love you three thousand.

Here’s to another ten years of cinematic superhero excellence.

#Michael in the Mainstream #MitM #Review #Movie review #Avengers: Endgame #Endgame #Avengers #Marvel #MCU #Marvel Cinematic Universe #Infinity Saga #Iron Man #Captain America #Thanos #Superhero #superhero movie #spoilers #Endgame spoilers

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eddycurrents · 5 years

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For the week of 22 July 2019

Quick Bits:

A Walk Through Hell #12 concludes what has been an excellent horror tale from Garth Ennis, Goran Sudžuka, Ive Svorcina, and Rob Steen with another trip into existential terror as we’re given a glimpse of what this is all about and what’s coming.

| Published by AfterShock

Action Comics #1013 keeps a lot of plates spinning as it works through elements of “Year of the Villain”, Event Leviathan, the ongoing Invisible Mafia story thread, and the Rose and Thorn revival. It’s kind of impressive as to how it remains entertaining and engrossing with as much going on.

| Published by DC Comics

Age of Conan: Bêlit #5 is another ending this week, as we finish off Bêlit’s coming of age origin story, as she confronts the Stygian priest and lays claim to her title of Queen of the Black Coast. Great art from Kate Niemczyk, Scott Hanna, Andrea Di Vito, and Jason Keith.

| Published by Marvel

Amazing Spider-Man #26 introduces us to the new Sinister Syndicate fully as they plan an attack on Boomerang. It’s kind of funny to see him still getting into trouble even now that he’s trying to stay legit. Great art from Kev Walker and Laura Martin.

| Published by Marvel

Ascender #4 gives us a few surprises in the fight between the vampires and the resistance. The grey washes, with mixes of red, from Dustin Nguyen on the vampire’s throneworld is very impressive.

| Published by Image

Batgirl #37 launches the new creative team of Cecil Castellucci, Carmine Di Giandomenico, Jordie Bellaire, and AndWorld Design with part one of “Oracle Rising”. There’s a nice battle with Killer Moth, emphasizing what some villains are doing in order to try to get noticed by Luthor to receive the offer, while playing up the expense that goes into crimefighting. Also, the Terrible Trio unleash something probably not too good.

| Published by DC Comics

Dark Red #5 concludes the first arc as Chip and Evie try to fight off an army of Nazi vampires. It’s good, with some nice funny moments. Great art from Corin Howell and Mark Englert.

| Published by AfterShock

Detective Comics #1008 is a straight-forward single issue story of Batman and Joker at the circus from Peter J. Tomasi, Doug Mahnke, Jaime Mendoza, Dave Baron, and Rob Leigh. It’s a refreshing change of pace from the extended arcs, even as it sets up a new threat in the “Year of the Villain” offering.

| Published by DC Comics

Dial H for Hero #5 gets a little meta as we dive into the Multiverse, the Heroverse, and the Bleed from Sam Humphries, Joe Quinones, Scott Hanna, Jordan Gibson, and Dave Sharpe. The use of breaking through panels, reproductions of old comics scenes, and a variation of styles just deliver phenomenal storytelling.

| Published by DC Comics / Wonder Comics

Dungeons & Dragons: A Darkened Wish #2 continues to fill in the backstory of the adventurers’ time with the White Sails, introducing us to the pitfalls that harried them, before giving more hints in the present of the nightmare that tore them apart. B. Dave Walters, Tess Fowler, Jay Fotos, and Neil Uyetake are delivering an entertaining fantasy tale here.

| Published by IDW

Fearless #1 is a new three-issue anthology mini-series spotlighting a number of the women of Marvel, both characters and creative talent. This first issue leads off with a continuing lead feature from Seanan McGuire, Claire Roe, Rachelle Rosenberg, and Janice Chiang, as Sue Richards, Carol Danvers, and Storm prepare to visit a girls camp as motivational speakers. There’s also an entertaining Mille the Model back-up from Leah Williams, Nina Vakueva, Rosenberg, and Chiang. And a very funny Jessica Jones story from the Captain Marvel team of Kelly Thompson, Carmen Carnero, Tamra Bonvillain, with Chiang. Though short, that last story is pretty much worth the price of the issue alone.

| Published by Marvel

Five Years #3 sees Tambi meet with Ivy and Julie to discuss that various nations around the world are dangerously developing Phi-alloy technology. Also a surprise appearance of people we thought were out. Great art as always from Terry Moore.

| Published by Abstract Studio

The Flash #75 delivers three stories for this extra-sized anniversary issue. The lead concludes the “Year One” arc. This is some of the best art that I have ever seen from Howard Porter, he and Hi-Fi just deliver amazing artwork here. There are also two back-ups, one hinting at things to come in the future for Barry and the other tying in to “Year of the Villain” as Captain Cold receives Luthor’s offer.

| Published by DC Comics

Guardians of the Galaxy #7 begins the second arc, “Faithless”, from Donny Cates, Cory Smith, David Curiel, and Cory Petit. It really introduces us to the new Universal Church of Truth as they take out an entire squadron of the Nova Corps and then worse things happen as the Guardians go off to investigate. I love the name for the Guardians’ new ship and that final page is one hell of a shock.

| Published by Marvel

History of the Marvel Universe #1 is an interesting project from Mark Waid, Javier Rodríguez, Álvaro López, and Joe Caramagna. It’s framed as Galactus telling Franklin Richards (at least I think that’s Franklin Richards) the history of the universe before it dies and the next is reborn. As expected, it’s dry facts, but it’s fascinating in how it’s comprehensively presented and the artwork from Rodríguez and López is jaw-dropping gorgeous. There are also annotations in the back to show where these events come from. It’s well put together and I highly recommended it to die-hard Marvel fans.

| Published by Marvel

Invisible Kingdom #5 concludes the first arc with an almost entirely one-sided battle between the Sun Dog and a Lux battleship. G. Willow Wilson, Christian Ward, and Sal Cipriano elevate the tension nicely through this issue and give a few surprises when everything seems grim and it looks like the end.

| Published by Dark Horse / Berger Books

Killer Groove #3 wonderfully showcases one of Jackie’s cases as it intertwines with the music scene and criminal underworld. Ollie Masters, Eoin Marron, Jordie Bellaire, and Hassan Otsmane-Elhaou are doing a nice job with this series of crafting one larger story out of many separate smaller tales.

| Published by AfterShock

Lazarus: Risen #2 is another dense read. The series has always been hefty, but this new format has elevated things further, doubling up comics content and adding a prose short story, the letters pages, and extra content like gaming material and the usual in-world advertisements. I’m loving it. Greg Rucka, Michael Lark, Tyler Boss, Santi Arcas, Simon Bowland, Adam Christopher, and Crystal Frasier are definitely giving you your money’s worth and more here. Excellent comics content as the war between Carlyle and Morray/D’Souza heats up.

| Published by Image

Livewire #8 pits Amanda versus Jada for a final round. It’s still interesting how practically everyone is trying to portray Amanda’s actions as harmful and villainous. Great art from Kano.

| Published by Valiant

Martian Manhunter #7 sees J’onn and Diane uncover some of the results of the experiments that have been going on with the kidnapped and missing people, it’s horrifying. Incredible and haunting artwork in this one from Riley Rossmo and Ivan Plascencia.

| Published by DC Comics

Marvels: Epilogue is a short, but sweet, coda to the Marvels series from Kurt Busiek, Alex Ross, John Roshell, and Richard Starkings. It spotlights events from X-Men #98 through the eyes of Phil Sheldon and his daughters, capturing some of the awe, wonder, and terror that Sheldon experienced during the main series. The book is filled out with an interview with Busiek and Ross on their experience with the series and what it’s like to look back on it 25 years later, as well as interviews with the editors who worked on the book.

| Published by Marvel

Middlewest #9 sets out a new quest for Abel as he comes across the Nowak people. Skottie Young, Jorge Corona, Jean-Francois Beaulieu, and Nate Piekos are continuing to make magic with this series. The art is beautiful and the story is endlessly captivating.

| Published by Image

Psi-Lords #2 continues to investigate these four captives, changed for whatever reason by the Psi-Lords, and the habitat of their prison. An interesting jail hierarchy of gangs is revealed and a bit of a memory of the four’s lives before being captured. Gorgeous art from Renato Guedes.

| Published by Valiant

Star Pig #1 is weird. Very weird. Delilah S. Dawson, Francesco Gaston, Sebastian Cheng, and Shawn Lee give us the story of a kid on her way to space camp whose ship is struck and destroyed by an asteroid, saved by a space pig and a scavenger energy ball. It’s probably one of the more unique tales I’ve seen in a while.

| Published by IDW

Sword Master #1, like Aero before it, features two stories. In the first, Greg Pak adapts into English a tale from Shuizhu and Gunji of the titular hero, Lin Lie, and his quest to find his missing father. It’s an interesting start and the artwork from Gunji is gorgeous. The back up original story pairs Shang-Chi up with Lin in a story from Greg Pak, Ario Anindito, Rachelle Rosenberg, and Travis Lanham. It follows up on their appearance in the New Agents of Atlas tie-in to “War of the Realms” and presents an interesting antagonist on their trail.

| Published by Marvel

Valkyrie #1 is a wonderful debut from Jason Aaron, Al Ewing, CAFU, Jesus Aburtov, and Joe Sabino. We get some continued supporting cast from Jane Foster’s time as Thor, although with a new status quo, and an interesting hook in trying to track down Dragonfang, the former Valkyrie’s sword. The art from CAFU and Aburtov is beautiful.

| Published by Marvel

Warlord of Mars Attacks #2 continues this crossover of John Carter and Mars Attacks. It’s interesting how it incorporates Edgar Rice Burroughs’ stories as actual things in this world and explains how Mars as a dead planet and one as teeming with life as Barsoom could exist simultaneously.

| Published by Dynamite

The Weatherman Vol. 2 #2 gives us more of a look at the nightmare that has consumed Earth as the crew attempt to find the doctor who might be able to fix everything. It goes about as well as could be expected. The monster designs and execution from Nathan Fox and Moreno Dinisio are incredible.

| Published by Image

Web of Venom: Funeral Pyre #1 is another one-shot catching up on the wider world of Venom as we barrel headlong into Absolute Carnage. Cullen Bunn, Joshua Cassara, Alberto Alburquerque, Jay David Ramos, and Clayton Cowles give us a great story checking in with Andi Benton, the former Mania and occasional sidekick to Flash Thompson’s Venom.

| Published by Marvel

Wonder Woman #75 continues “Return of the Amazons” from G. Willow Wilson, Xermanico, Jesus Merino, Vicente Cifuentes, Romulo Fajardo Jr., and Pat Brosseau. This arc basically brings Wilson’s run around full circle to deal with some of the elements that kicked off her first issue as Diana faces off against Grail. Some really nice double page spreads with border art from Xermanico.

| Published by DC Comics

Other Highlights: Archie #706, Archie vs. Predator 2 #1, Bone Parish #11, Books of Magic #10, Clue: Candlestick #3, Curse Words #23, Doctor Strange #16, Farmhand #10, Freedom Fighters #7, Grumble #8, House of X #1, Justice League Dark #13, Lumberjanes #64, Magic: The Gathering - Chandra #3, Magnificent Ms. Marvel #5, Marvel Action: Avengers #6, Mighty Morphin Power Rangers #41, Night Moves #5, Redneck #22, Secret Warps: Arachknight Annual #1, Shuri #10, Star Trek: The Q Conflict #6, Star Wars #69, TMNT: The Rise of the TMNT - Sound Off #1, Tony Stark: Iron Man #14, The Wicked + The Divine #44

Recommended Collections: Black Panther - Book 7: The Intergalactic Empire of Wakanda Part 2, Go-Bots - Volume 1, Harrow County: Library Edition - Volume 3, House of Whispers - Volume 1: The Power Divided, James Bond: Origin - Volume 1, Lodger - Volume 1, Lumberjanes - Volume 12, Savage Sword of Conan - Volume 1: The Cult of Koga Thun, Self/Made, Star Wars Adventures - Volume 6: The Flight of the Falcon, Thor of Realms, William Gibson’s Alien 3

d. emerson eddy might well be a space lord.

#This Week in Comics

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speckeh · 6 years

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My 2019 Garbage Book Dump

It’s 2019! I’m tired, I’m hella gay, and I’m still reading books as much as I can with my busy life! Enjoy this book list with reviews!

1. Thunderball: 5/5 stars. Mormon jokes. Making fun of dietary changes? A young Italian woman (girl) who controls the island with her beauty. It becomes a mission against nuclear threats against the Europe and the US? Not exactly the MOST thrilling James Bond book, but I had a lot of fun reading it. I’m glad this was my first read of the year!

2. The Lydia Steptoe Stories - Faber Stories: 4/5 stars. I found these short, tiny books in a local bookstore. There were 6 of them on the table and I bought three. Sometimes I wish I bought all of them, but not all of them spoke to me. The Lydia collection was interesting as it held three stories with: a young man being “seduced” by his aunt, a young girl wanting to be a dominatrix, and a woman who wishes she could be youthful again. While I didn’t find the stories awe-inspiring, I did find them extremely entertaining and nice to think about.

3. Emma Cozy Classics: 5/5 stars. I have the pride and prejudice one. While it might not be as fabulous as a full book, but the pain-staking skill of felt art is entirely impressive. It went on my Jane Austen book shelf.

4. Come Rain or Shine - Faber Stories: 3/5 stars. What would you do if your friends thought you were absolutely insane and their lives are falling apart worse than yours? What would you do if your friend asks you to play absolutely stupid to his wife to make him look better and for her to realize her life isn’t so bad that she got lucky enough to not marry you? I for one, would drop these fucking friends and never look back. The story was a fucking train wreck and absolutely insane to the point where it wasn’t even humorous to me. Several authors state it’s Ishiguro’s step into comical writing and I wish he wouldn’t.

5. Passionate Minds - Women Rewriting the World: 1/5 stars. I found this book at my Uni’s free bookshelf. I was super excited to read this book but it’s one of the dullest and full of biases book I’ve had the displeasure of picking up. I got to read about my girl Gertrude Stein but I was expecting more female writers, not actors who the writer obvious gets off on. There’s nothing wrong with that, and this book has rave reviews, I just couldn’t stand the writing style and obvious fawning she had (and not in the academic/historically reserved way authors should be).

6. Wandering Island Vol. 2: 4/5 stars. It’s been two years since the first volume came out. I found myself reading it in record time which has me both disappointed and a bit confused (not because I read it fast, but because of the strange editorial ending). The art is impeccable with a few questionable “obviously a man drew this” moment, the story has kind of been a bit muddled up and didn’t necessarily go anywhere this volume. It felt more of a build up for Volume 3 which I don’t know when will be released. The editor wrote this strange 6 page essay that started off they were going to postpone Wandering Island 3, then went on a long rant about how the manga editing world has changed with ^-^ faces all throughout, only to then write fan theories of where they think the story is going to finish with: “We’ll translate the pages as soon as they come out! ^-^” what the fuck?? Haha

7. Fun Home - A Family Tragicomic. 5/5 stars. I bought this book today and I finished it this evening. I’m still processing everything that happened but one thing I know for sure is that I found one of my top 5 books of 2019 as well as a new favorite already. Alison approaches a hard topic of coming out, learning about her father’s secret life of being bisexual, and coming to terms with the strange person with anger issues that was her father. While my father wasn’t gay, there were several elements of her father I saw in my own. The volatile anger, learning more about his life after his death, hearing shattering truths from your mom, the regret of not having conversations sooner and him not seeing who you truly are before their passing. It struck a chord with me and I’m going to be thinking about this comic book I feel like for two months.

8. The Real McCoy: 4/5 stars. This is like a small wikipedia pamphlet book about the famous names, phrases, or lyrics you might know. I wasn’t necessarily impressed with the booklet, but I found some of it entertaining. I gave it a high rating because it served its purpose but I’m totally gifting it to a friend who loves random facts.

9. The Heart Affirming: 5/5 Stars. Epic poems about the Greek Gods, the universal feeling of appreciating nature, the wondering of the cruelty of humanity. This is a rare find of a poetry book not popular and one I found at my local library book sale that was signed by the author. If you have the pleasure to pick up this 1939 poetry book, please do! It’s a treat from the past that shows we still yearn for the same poetic romanticism we did then to now.

10. Bloom: 4.5/5 stars. I’ve realized I’m going to graduate college in the fall and this weird depression hit where I realized my life is really finally going to change forever. So I’m having a mixture of senioritis where I don’t want to do any work when I’m done with school by Wednesday, and I’m having a mid-century life crisis where I don’t know what to do with my life (I mean I do, but it’s terrifying). So I went on a LGTBQ+ splurge on amazon, something i haven’t done in awhile, Bloom was one of those books. Bloom is a fast paced comic about a high school graduate who wants to move out and move on, but his friends are dicks and his parents want him to stay. Welcome the new hot boy whose grandma just died and conveniently loves to bake. Ari wants to leave the bakery and this new hot guy is just his ticket to leave, or is it? I really liked this comic for the art and the story line was refreshing. But there were several instances where the book moves really quickly and the development was… meh. HeartStopper has great, slow pacing that lets you feel like the characters and story moves in a believable way. Bloom is rushed in some parts, but still.. So cute.

11. Spinning: 5/5 Stars. 2/4 of the LGTBQ+ books I ordered have been read! I read this book the day before valentine’s day and I’ve already been in a weird mode/crisis of being a university senior. I, loved this book for all the reasons why people gave it 3 stars. Everyone stated the story didn’t wrap up, that i jumped, that it felt fragments, but if you read the very end the author state not all books should make sense or follow a timeline or be accurate and these followed her own recollection without revisiting anything. I really appreciated and I loved the style. It’s a heavy book with sexual assault, manipulation, child abuse, and a very unhappy protagonist who isn’t likeable. But at the same time, finishing this book I just felt such grief that I didn’t pursue an art career. That I didn’t just join an art program or give my art career a chance. I think when I’m in the end of my career, retirement, I may go to art school again or maybe I’ll splurge money on lessons or maybe I’ll just accept my art as is. Either way, this book made me fiercely jealous of a 21 year old. It reminded me of a famous story of my dad reading a book about astronauts and crying in the bath because he should have been an astronaut, and how this book made me want to cry because in some form I should have been an artist. But like my dad, we’ve both chased careers that really inspired and gave us amazing opportunities. But I think it’s natural to miss over those childhood passions you didn’t follow through with because you felt like you weren’t enough.

12. My Solo Exchange Diary Vol 2. 2.5/5 stars. I read the first volume last year due to prompting from one of my precious friends (Ramona). My loneliness with Lesbianism was AMAZING. I bought it. My Solo Exchange Diary felt like the author was rambling in circles, completely mentally unwell, and had no ideas of how to properly take care of herself. In Volume 2 she was able to search for some help and she was able to deal with some introspective thoughts about how her viewpoint might have been wrong and how she was toxic to herself and her family. Volume 2 still left a taste in my mouth that felt… weird? She’s moving in the right directions but I think she’s desperately trying to follow the hype of her lesbian hit manga and she’s failing due to her wants to surpass herself. I laughed and felt bad as she mentioned how people slammed her for Volume 1, so it felt very meta to read how she reacted because my comment was also criticizing her: read here. But if you’re reading it in a bookstore or a library, do it. It’s nice to see how she’s slowly making progress with herself.

13. Sputnik Sweetheart. 1/5 stars. I picked this up in Brussels in the select few english section because the cover was intriguing and the back cover claimed it was a lesbian story. I was so excited, and imagine my absolutely hatred when I realized a straight cisgender man had written a “lesbian” story through the eyes of a straight male who is lusting after his lesbian best friend. He proclaims he gets boners at looking at her breasts and how her eccentric style only makes her that more beautiful just to him. I hate everything about this book. I wish straight cisgendered men would leave lesbian narrative stories alone unless you’re going to write them right. Get the fuck out of my books.

14. Fortunate Beasts: Letters to Lucardo Vol 2: 5/5 stars. The long waited and anticipated sequel to Letters to Lucardo!!! It’s been two years since I read the first volume, supported it on kickstarters, and I’m going to keep funding each release until the quadiology is complete! This had a lot less background building, exciting sex scenes, but you now understand the two lovers and get to see them develop their budding relationship. While it wasn’t as smut riddled as I expected, I was very happy with the continuation!

15. The little Lame Prince: 2/5 stars. DNF. Did not finish in case for those who don’t know/can’t remember (I hardly remember what DNF stands for myself). I’m torn as I want to eventually finish this book but I’m just not in the mood for it. It’s a sweet story but is very slow and from what I can tell, repeats itself a lot. It’s a old book from the early 1800s which explains the somewhat hard language and problematic moments, but it’s still charming. I’ll debate when I’ll try this again. For now, it’s returning to my shelves with a bookmark in the pages.

16. Shounen Houkokusho. 5/5 stars. A shounen-ai soft, wholesome gay family about a little boy standing up for his dad’s long time partner and asking them to get married. Very sweet. So precious. I love.

17. Same Difference and Other Stories: 4/5 stars. This was a reread from my friend Mark who gifted this to me back in december of 2014. It’s been 5 years since I picked up this book and I decided to see how its changed. As an adult, this comic speaks to me a lot louder than it did nearly half a decade ago. Struggling to find your way through life, seeing all your high school “friends” getting married, having jobs, meanwhile you’re just.. Here. Definitely a story I needed to revisit again in the future and also I still appreciate Mark’s notes he left in here for me!

18. Amazing Women: 101 Lives to Inspire you: 4/5 stars. This was my gift after finally being cut loose from the cancer clinic. I never had to go back there again and so I decided to pick up a momento. This was the book I chose that they offered. I really appreciate how they cover diverse women from all over the world rather than American-centric. They don’t go further than 1826, keping mostly within 200 years which is a bit of a bummer. There were also some choices I felt were questionable, like Zoe Sugg (who had her book ghost written and scams her viewers) and that they didn’t have Alison Bechendel was a huge disappointment. But this book is opinionated as they did have to narrow it down to 101 women, so I’m never going to be happy unless I pick my own. I also appreciated that if a diplomat was assassinated they mentioned it in the book.

19. The Epic of Gilgamesh: 5/5 stars. I learned about the Epic of Gilgamesh back when I was a itty-bitty sophomore in high school. I remember being so intrigued and would draw my gay ass characters as the Harlot and Endurk. I think I still have the drawings somewhere and they’re cringey. I bought the book and it’s been sitting on my shelf for YEARS. I did a deep clean of my bookshelves last night from 11:30 pm - 4:30 am, and this morning I just wanted to read since I haven’t been able to for months. I loved it! I love creation myths, old myths from “lost” cultures, plus the language was hella gay in this story. It’s a short 61 pages, so if you have like an hour or two and are in the mood for some myths baby, pick it up!

20. The Making of Pride and Prejudice: 4/5 stars. This book is chalked full of interviews from staff, actors, photos of the sets, and a bit too long section on the director and writers moaning about a script. I loved the photos of the behind the scenes and reading Colin Firth’s reluctancy to take, arguably, his most iconic role because he didn’t care for classical movies. Thought they were boring. Really a cool book to have if you’re a big Pride and Prejudice 1995 fan.

21. Greek Myths: 2/5 stars. I love the artwork in this book, but the author shows a lack of research when he writes the Roman names for the greek gods. I’m all fine with showing a Roman cultural story, but if you’re writing a Greek Myths story, BITCH use the Greek names!!! If it wasn’t for the artwork, this book would be traaash.

22. Wicked: 5/5 stars. I’ve been in a reading rut for almost a month where I’ve felt unmotivated to do anything. Since going back to brief counseling and getting my head on straight again, I’ve felt the motivation to read. I’m also doing the 2019 OWLS for a Wandmaker and this was one of my assignments. I absolutely loved Wicked. The musical came in last month and it reinvigorated my love for the show. I’ve been wanting to read the book, it’s been haunting me for awhile and I found a back of the Wicked series for 5 dollars at my library sale. Snatched that bitch up. I read this 408 pages in two weeks, probably would have in a week but school. God, I related so much to Elphaba. Not so much the whole, feeling like she has no soul, but taking school seriously and not making friends, coming from a religious family and rebelling, feeling like she’s responsible for her whole family, (not feeling like she’s attractive) and seeing her growth and becoming more comfortable with herself really made me feel better about myself? It’s a super dark book, but it’s great. It’s really great.

23. A Children’s Guide to the Night Sky: 4/5 stars. This was essentially the condensed and easier version of my Stars and Cosmology course I took two years ago!! I sped read this and some of the greek myths they described were dumb down/removed the queerness of it. Which is why I took off a whole star.

24. The Life-Changing Manga of Tidying Up: 5/5 stars. Hello Marie Kondo. Everyone is on a cleaning kick/obsessed with Marie Kondo. I liked this comic because it was short and also made her book in a bite size, story drive style. I liked its simplistic form!

25. Julian is a Mermaid: 5/5 stars. I’ve had my eye on this book for a year, ever since it was announced in Goodreads’ monthly list. I found the last copy and snatched it up. I like the muted colors, the art style, the different bodies, and letting little boys know it’s ok to dress up as mermaids or anything feminized. A great message!!!

26. Kiss Number 8: 5/5 stars. This is one of those random comics I saw in the new releases and the cover caught my eye. I read the first few pages and decided to buy it. I loved it as it’s a coming out story but the main story isn’t revolved around coming out. It’s about the complicated nature of family, coming out through the years, and trans themes. I know some people say this book and the characters are transphobic due to misgendering and dead names used, but the main character is catholic. Her family are mega catholic. She’s going to a catholic school. Of course there’s going to be misgendering and dead names used! It’s how people naturally react to news. If you’re super sensitive, I wouldn’t read this book, but I loved it to bits. I held it to my chest like I do rarely with those books that give you the warm feels.

27. Elephi - The Cat with the High IQ: 5/5 stars. This was a book I grabbed at a close down sale. It’s about Elephi who sees a small fiat car abandoned in the snow outside and decides to use his brains to get the car inside the fifth story apartment. The author really knows how cats act and I felt like all the mannerisms were perfect for a year old cat(kitten). Really a cute book that I read in 40 minutes??

28. One Happy Tiger: 4/5 stars. A book about a tiger counting friends. Cute. It’s a children’s book. Not too substantial in anything.

29. The Language of Thorns: 5/5 stars. Ok WOW. I bought this about a year ago during B&N’s signed deals where they just had a ton of books signed by the authors. I’ve seen this book floating around on BookTube for awhile and I decided to check it out at the bookstore. The illustrations sold me and I bought it. Imagine the already dark Grimm’s fairy tales, but darker. More context for the characters: Ursula, the Nutcracker, Hansel and Gretel but if Gretel was the only one at home. Really amazing stories and if you’re interested in dark, pretty illustrations that change with each page, pick it up!

30. Satoko and Nada vol 1: 5/5 stars. Ramona and I went to B&N yesterday, just sitting around like two useless gays reading a bunch of manga. This is one she picked out and told me to read it. You know me, as a white academic I am constantly on the lookout for narratives that aren’t white and can educate me. This was one of them! Satoko is from Japan while Nada is from Saudi Arabia, both are exchange students in the US. Their friendship, learning about each other’s cultures is so fucking cute. ;0;

31: I Hear the Sunspot vol 1: 4/5 stars. I docked this down from a 5 star rating because it just jumps into a established plot. I had no idea if this was a continuation from another series or if the author purposefully just threw us in the mix of an established gay relationship but they’re not really (they are but they’re confused) with some flashbacks that looks like it came from another volume? But despite those factors, the art is gorgeous. The characters are well developed and have complex background and stories to tell (one of the main characters has a degenerative hearing issue and will eventually become deaf).

32. Building Writing Center Assessments that Matter: 4/5 stars. This was a required text I had for a independent study I was a part of where I created a assessment of the climate of where I worked. This is a great resource in learning how to build assessments from scratch, and if you’ve never conducted one. I found the information they gave was limited to assessment of students who use the a writing center, while my assessment was more focused on how safe, valued, and heard those who currently work in the space feel. A great way to step into assessments!

33. Mary Ventura and the Ninth Kingdom: 4/5 stars. This was the first fictionalized piece of Slyvia Plath I’ve read. I can understand why it wasn’t published at first. There’s a lot of loose ends. Why was Mary going to the Ninth Kingdom? Why is everyone so placant in going to a “hell” type place? Also what the hell was the ending and her running away? This story left a lot to be answered, but I also love that about this short story.

34. Momo to Manji Vol 2: 5/5 stars. Volume two of one of my favorite historical yaoi mangas. It’s still hasn’t been fully translated just yet but I love it all the same!! So many complex characters, relationships!

35. Sweet Blue Flowers Vol 1. 5/5 stars. The first edition of a 5 volume series. Ramona told me to read this and I devoured the first book! Wholesome young girls falling in love with each other! Boyish girls who are heartthrobs! Unrequited love galore! Definitely going to check out the rest of the volumes!

36. Laura Dean Keeps Breaking Up with Me: 5/5 stars. Man. This comic took me through a roller coaster of feelings. First it kind of made me miss the constant interactions I had with people in junior high and high school. It also reminded me heavily of my first gf and I wondered if she and her friends viewed me as Laura Dean (in terms of being too cool. I never cheated lmao. And always just out of reach). It made me melancholy for a younger me who was also hopeless in love with their best friend. It was a wild ride, but one I recommend wholeheartedly!

37. Lovable Lyle: 5/5 stars. I’ve been looking at this little crocodile for awhile and I’ve come to the conclusion he is me. This book was silly but heartwarming as Lyle is beloved but suddenly receives letters from his sworn enemy. They try to ignore it, but they are persistent until they catch the culprit. Fucking ridiculous story but I loved every second.

38. The Great American Pin-Up: 5/5 stars. It was really cool how they sectioned off each famous artist of pin-ups. Some of them were tasteful nudes, semi-nudes, or lingerie teasing moments. As someone who is both gay and used to draw pin-up girls, this is a great reference!!!!

39. Drawing the R.A.F.: 5/5 stars. This book is one of those rarer finds. A british artist was commissioned to draw the officers of the R.A.F. in the middle of World War II. Some portraits are far better than others, but the worser ones are attached with amazing stories. Such as a 6”6’ pilot having to be physically shoved in a spitfire. These are fantastic and the art work is really beautiful.

40. Where’s Will? 4/5 stars. Where’s Will is a William Shakespeare version of Where’s Waldo. The art is beautiful and the hidden characters are extremely clever. However, I remember so often spending hours upon hours trying to find Waldo and the extreme satisfaction of finally finding him. Where’s Will I could find him within 5 minutes. It never went long enough to the point I feel worn and frustrated and finding several more interesting characters. He stood out more than he should and I flew through this book that Waldo would find insulting! But the illustrations are beautiful!

41. Carr’s Pocket Books - Florence Nightingale: 4/5 stars. This mini collection of Nightingale’s journals throughout her life is really interesting. As a woman who revolutionized what it meant to be a nurse and nurse practices, it was nice to see her own words from age 9 to 90. She was an elegant little girl with her writing and she showed wisdom beyond her years. Did I learn anything substantial about her work? No. But I did come to know her on a far more personal level that I appreciate.

42. Carr’s Pocket Books - How Horatius Kept the Bridge: 5/5 stars. Another one of these small pocket sized books I bought in Oundle, England. I don’t know why, but I’ve just been desperate to go through my books and get rid of any and all that don’t speak to me anymore. I also just want to read, a lot. This was part of my kick this week, trying to get through as many as possible. This poem story is about Roman soldier Horatius and how he single handedly took the Bridge against the Greeks. It’s a military triumphant, silly, and mystical, but I really enjoyed the structure of it. It was short and sweet.

43. Echoland: 3.5/5 stars. Echoland follows Arvid, a 12 year old Norwegian boy who visits his grandparents in Denmark for the summer. However, he’s growing up and he’s realizing that his parents are strained for some reason, his sister is too grown for him, and his grandparents are getting older. This book was confusing. It was short, quick, and I think younger children would enjoy this book more than me. It deals with more adult themes but through the eyes of a 12 year old. However, I found a lot of the storyline to be confusing: Why does Arvid not want to be touched? Why are his parents fighting?? Why does he hate all the men in his family? Why is he pushing everyone away? Why are his parents putting up with his attitude? There are a LOT of questions I have and there’s no real answer to be found. Maybe it’s the author’s style, but I found the story to be not as believable, but still enjoyable.

44. Mathilda. 2.5/5 stars. Mathilda was an audiobook I listened to as I suddenly got a migraine at around 6 pm and it didn’t let up until around midnight. The last three hours I’ve been listening to it. I thought this was Matilda from Roald Dahl but was instead by Mary Shelley herself. This was a very bizarre story. I really enjoyed the first half of the story which is about Mathilda writing a final letter to her best friend upon her deathbed. She’s retelling him her tragic story and how the death of her father was her fault. Her childhood was very bleak, touch starved as her mother died and her father abandoned her to his half sister. Her half sister wasn’t warm to her and saw her as a pest, which had Mathilda growing up til she was 16 without a father. Suddenly her father decided to return and within 2 months of his return her aunt dies, and now she’s in his custody. At first everything is fine, until her father starts to lash out at her and is very distant. He at first wants Mathilda to replace her mother and then rejects the idea. They go for a walk and Mathilda presses her father to tell her his deep secret and why he hates her all of a sudden. He refuses until she presses on and then he tells her that he lusts for her. She freaks out, he almost dies in the woods from shame, and then he leaves the next morning. Mathilda is then angry because SHE wanted to leave her father, but because he’s abandoning her again she chases after him. She finds him dead in a hotel room and then Mathilda begins to resent life and living. The story was great up until she decides to chase her father after he leaves her. It became a jumbled mess and Mathilda herself says her mind is a little mad with her decisions. The story started off as an intrigue with beauty descriptions, intense, and then just went bat shit crazy. The story ended on beautiful reflections on nature and how death is not beautiful for those living, but it really lost me. The last hour was a drag. I would definitely suggest listening to it if you have a migraine!

45. Megume to Tsugumi: 5/5 stars. Gay comic, lmao.

46. Golden Sparkle: 5/5 stars. I don’t remember the plot but it was cute.

47. Maltese Falcon: 2/5 stars. I was forced to read this for a film and literature class. Everyone was ranting and raving how the main character should be a male role model but that’s extremely stupid. Look, I love bad male representation (looking at you James Bond), but he was just trash. I get this is a famous crime novel, but GOD. It’s bad.

48. Maiden & Princess: 5/5 stars. This was about a maiden going to a ball who everyone thought she would marry the Prince. Except she and the Prince are best friends and she really fell in love with his sister. We love pride month books!

49. Prince & Knight: 5/5 stars. A gender-swap of Maiden & Princess except this was a Prince who goes off to slay a dragon to save his kingdom only to fall in love with a knight and marry him. SO GOOD.

50. Komi Can’t Communicate, Vol. 1: 4/5 stars. My friend Ramona told me to read this volume since she read it and loved it. While I loved the art and Komi, the story line was just a tad flat for me. It’s a really fun series if you like high school semi-romance but mostly heavy on friendship~!

51. What was Stonewall? 3/5 stars. This was one of those children informative books where they retell a piece of history. I thought this was great for children who know nothing about Stonewall but are hearing it from Drag Queens or in June for Pride History Month. I thought the information about Stonewall was short and concise and also good for children, however the book did verge off point and talk about other points of history as well as random actors who are gay. This is good, but it isn’t Stone wall, you know?

52. Pride: The Story of Harvey Milk and the Rainbow Flag: 4/5 stars. I watched Milk and I cried at the end. I’ve been wanting to know more about how Milk created our Pride Flag and this was another one of those books where it’s curated for children. So I appreciate the run down version it gives us, but they had to “modify” what the stripes mean, such as purple being Sexuality. Let kids hear the unfiltered truth!

53. TBH #1: TBH, This Is So Awkward: 4/5 stars. This was in the teen new released section and it’s a book of text messages. I hated this book, but also was way too invested in it when I was reading it out loud to my date. It’s just a bunch of middle school people sending love notes, getting the Valentine’s Day dance cancelled because they won’t stop using their phone and their principal said “Social Decency.” And then it ended by one of the girls bringing the valentine’s day dance back by creating a Task Force to enforce no texting during school. It was fucking wild and I loved every page I flipped through and wrote in.

54. Adaptations from Short Story to Big Screen: 4/5 stars. I liked it well enough, it was a textbook so I didn’t really read the stories in-depth. However, there are two stories I absolutely love which are Field of Dreams and Smoke Signals.

55. Our Father Who Art in a Tree: 5/5. I loved this book. It’s very true to the experience of what it’s like to be depressed and the first few months of deep grief. While I didn’t lose my parent until my teenage years and my brothers were older, but the strained relationships grief causes is so fucking poignant.

56. Little Miss P: 5/5 stars. I know it’s strange, because it’s a man writing a book about periods, but this was an excellent book. It really showcased the love-hate relationship women have with their periods and also sometimes accurate representations of what it feels like.

57. Ginza Neon Paradise: 4/5 stars. I don’t remember reading this manga! (I’m updating my book list after some months)

58. Na Leo I Ka Makani/Voices on the Wind: 5/5 stars. A book of history and photos of native Hawaiians, royals, and other cultural aspects important to the island. Some really cool photos.

59. Satoko & Nada vol. 2: 5/5 stars. Satoko and Nada are back again, continuing on with their studies and friendship. This book still continues to teach westerners some cool Eastern values while the main characters are learning about each other as well. I think the 3rd volume will come out soonish and that might be the end!!! I love this little series!

60. Annie on My Mind: 5/5 stars. One of the first lesbian novels to show a happy ending with the characters. It’s very much a high school love story and first real love. There were some parts of the story that were absolutely aggravating, painfully embarrassing, but also really heart warming. It’s a queer foundational book in literature, and if you’re interested in the history of queer literature, this should be on your list.

61. Killing Stalking: 5/5 stars. The comic finally ended. I started reading it in 2016 and finished in 2019. God was it a ride. It was full of conflicting feelings, creepiness, and an ending that leaves the reader confused, fulfilled, and also not fulfilled at the same time. I wouldn’t suggest reading it for those who are squeamish with gore, violence, and dark sexual themes, but it’s a fantastic read into what it’s like to experience stockholm syndrome and intense violent trauma.

62. Go for it, Nakamura!: 5/5 stars. A high school student falls in love with his popular classmate, but his classmate doesn’t know he exists! A cute gay book about falling in love, making friends, and pushing yourself to achieve your goals!

63. The Great Gatsby: 4/5 stars. The next two books are books I listened to while deep cleaning my room. It took me two days to fully clean my room, and this was also a challenge for my N.E.W.T.S 2019. I remember reading this book in high school and liking, and I think I lent out my copy and never saw it again. I bought it recently and decided to give it a re-read/listen. I think reading the book would have made it more engaging to me, but I found the themes to not be as impressive as an adult. Maybe it’s because I can’t relate to the characters or their choices are so dumb that I just can’t believe it anymore, but it was still entertaining to listen to. The narrator was great!

64. Emma (Narrated by Emma Thompson): 5/5 stars. This feels a bit like cheating because this rendition was not only abridged, but also had live actors. I’m very familiar with Emma, and Emma Thompson as the narrator was a genius move. However, do I feel like I read/listened to Emma? Not really.

65. Fresh Romance, Vol. 1: 4/5 stars. Half of the stories were very confusing and not very good. However, I really loved two stories about a Regency marriage and a spin off of Beauty and the Beast. I would read this volume just for those additions.

66. Pilu of the Woods: 5/5 stars. A cute story about emotions, friendship, and the woods. It even has a recipe on the back I want to read it!! The colors and characters are adorable. The storyline might not be as solid, but it’s a great read!

67. Ou-same to Puppy Love: 5/5 stars. A foreign prince falls in love with a neat-freak government official. Queue stupid boys in love!

68. Sugar Days: 5/5 stars. Childhood best friends, one small and manly, one tall and feminine, both love each other without having the courage to tell the other!!!! Very cute!!!!!

69. The Tea Dragon Society: 5/5 stars. I remember seeing this book a year ago and how everyone was ranting and raving about it. However, I never bought it or saw it. My best friend brought it over the other day for me to read and I could finally see what the fuss was about. QUEER CHARACTERS, LITTLE DRAGONS WITH TEA LEAVES GROWING OFF OF THEM, MULTIPLE REPRESENTATION!!!! IT’S SO GOOOOOD!

70. Luminous Animal: 5/5 stars. A jazz poetry book. It’s interesting how Tony Moffeit can write the same theme over and over, with the same lines but in different poems with different perspectives. It was really cool!

71. Still Mostly True: 5/5 stars. A weird poetry book that has philosophy and deep meaning poems with also weird ass drawings. However, my poetry book had inscriptions from someone else to their friend. The inscriptions were sometimes very annoying, but also kind of heartwarming how this friend made sure her friend knew she was thinking of her and loving her.

72. Sky, Wind, and Stars. 5/5 stars. A poetry book that was a Korean activist who was murdered by the Japanese through medical experiments for his radical poetry. We watched the movie in my Korean History through film class, and I loved it to bits I wanted to read his poetry. The movie downplayed just how radical his poetry was. Even as a English speaker, I can clearly see the activism, Korean pride that was written during the Japanese occupation. It was a wonderful poetry book, and an important one to Koreans at that. If you have the chance to read it, please do.

73. Memoirs of a Geisha: 5/5 stars. Haley (one of my bffs) recommended me this book like 3 years ago. It’s her favorite and I kept saying I would read it. August was the N.E.W.T.S. challenge and this fit the category of “audiobook” as I listened to a fan read audio of it and then had to read the last 7 chapters. I completely see where my friend finds inspiration in her writing from this book! I really loved the sad story, the harsh reality of Japan, even if this book was more on the idealized version of WWII in Japan and how Geishas were. Some of the thinking of Chiyo I feel could be chalked up to white men ideal sexualization, but overall I really enjoyed this book! Plus the fan who read it was really into her characters and she made the experience really fun.

74. Be Prepared: 5/5 stars. When you’re poor, Russian, and have the All-American-Girls as your best friends, life is extremely hard. No one likes your Russian food, the smallness of your home, and listening to a language not their own. VERA NEEDS SOME FUCKING NEW FRIENDS. As someone whose best friend is Russian, has a sister-in-law who is Russian, and a nephew learning to speak Russian, some people are really insensitive and it drives me nuts. I know a lot of people are upset with this book because it’s not a “full memoir” and yet is described as a memoir. I’ll just pose the question, can you remember 1 month straight at 10 years old, from people to dialogue? No? Yeah, cut the book some slack. This has great representation in terms of Russian culture and learning through it from little Russian eyes.

75. Kiraide Isasete: 5/5 stars. It’s another gay manga.

76. I married my best friend to shut up my parents: 4/5 stars. While I appreciate this story is light-hearted, it seems a bit far fetched for my taste. Also the main character doesn’t believe she’s gay, so I find it hard that a) she would actually get married and b) would just readily fall in love with her friend when she’s literally had no sexual desire for anyone. But other than that, it’s a ridiculous love story and it’s to the point!

78. Heartstopper V.2: 5/5 stars. I already read this awhile ago but I finally got my copy! So I’m just putting it in my list!

79. Raven: 5/5 stars. Raven is the first installment of the origins of the Teen Titans characters. I really loved this novel since Raven has always been a dark character in the original show. This book explores her experience with death, coming to terms with her birth origins, and New Orleans with ancient magic. A great start to a series I’m looking forward to reading the rest of!

80. Heartless. 4/5 stars. A child is taken care of by a succubus (male) after a religious cult burns down a hospital to get rid of the succubus. This story is intense in the gore and horror, but pretty light in plot. There’s no real driving force behind the characters and what they do, no explanation, it’s all just there for the reader to assume it just happened. But the characters were dynamic and interesting with superhuman powers and abilities.

81. The Adventure Zone Vol. 2: 5/5 stars. Every time I see Madame Director I sigh in relief because she exactly looks how I envisioned her while listening to the podcast many years ago. The story line is short, I feel like some of the build up jokes are lost or the frustration Griffin has with his brothers and dad that make the podcast so hilarious are missing, but it’s a really beautiful comic and also a great way for people to start listening to TAZ and MBMBAM

82: The Wind in the Willow: 4/5 stars. An audiobook I listened to. I had the paperback but it was too much reading for my mind for a classic children book. When I found the option on Libby, I listened to it as I started my preparations for the start of my final semester as an undergraduate! It went by fast, the actors were in their characters and there were some songs performed. I really enjoyed it, even if Mr. Toad is ANNOYING AS FUCK. Would recommend for those wanting to kill 2 hours of their time.

83. Classmates: 5/5 stars. High school sweethearts? Can’t express their feelings well? Uh, sign me the FUCK uP.

84-108. W Juliet: 5/5 stars. I haven’t read W Juliet since I was in 7th grade. I remember that I loved it so much that when I was in high school I began collecting the volumes and proudly put it on my shelf. I used to have two bookshelves worth of manga, and when I grew older I sold them but only kept two series: Marmalade Boy and W Juliet (I’m gonna read Marmalade Boy next). I’ve been wanting to reread W Juliet recent and revisit Mako and Ito’s silliness, and with the long weekend I did. I was not prepared for the analysis it would give me to my own life. Like, holy shit. This manga series was so important in developing me who I was as a kid, (some of them very mild kinks that my rp friends are subjected to), the loss Ito has and her issues with gender and like 100000% me and how I don’t like masculine guys at all with their toxicity (hello Mako, you summer child boy). I honestly want to do a fucking research paper on this series with an analysis of myself because of how much I love this series and how I connect to it. You can bet your ass this manga is coming with me for the rest of my life.

109-117. Marmalade Boy: 3/5 stars. Marmalade Boy was the manga that started it all. I remember being 8, having found the manga section with my best friend, and we decided to share reading Marmalade Boy. I was so captivated by the story that I made her wait in the car at her house, refusing to let her have the book until I finished it. It was the final of the volume, and it wouldn’t be another 3 years until I read the series OUT OF ORDER. I kept rereading this series, picking it up, I remember it felt like watching a movie. As an adult? God this series is really awful. The characters are very annoying, the teacher is very creepy, the plot moves WAY too quickly, and no one knows what consent is. It’s fucking insane. 1-7 volume is trash, but the 8th volume really put to life in the characters. For one, they’re older, it's been a few years, and they can step back from the crazy lives of high school. If it wasn’t for the sheer nostalgia, I would be giving these books away. But you gotta pay respect to those books that introduced you to life changing moments.

118. Ouji to Kotori. 4/5 stars. An art student, a prince who buys him, trying to escape, foreign lands, a story that has a “romantic” but is open ended. I liked the flow of the story, the art, and the characters were actually believable.

119. Mean Girls Club. 3.5/5 stars. Mean Girls Club is a 1950s tale of girls rising against the patriarchy through sex, survivor, drugs, and murder. The art style is amazing. But the story line is flat and feels rushed. Not a favorite, but still pretty enjoyable.

120. Grumpy Monkey. 5/5 stars. Grumpy Monkey is the story of a monkey who wakes up grumpy. Despite everyone not believing he can be so grumpy on a beautiful day, him denying that he’s grumpy, and getting angry at people telling him HE’S grumpy, is such a goddamn mood. Nothing pisses me off more than people telling me my mood. You don’t know me. Fuck off. Anyways, this also felt like a mental health book for kids, letting them know it's ok to NOT feel ok. As long as someone is willing to listen and not wanting to fix your grumpiness.

121. Dia de los Muertos. 4/5 stars. A children’s informational book about the Day of the Dead. Short, simple, great education.

123. Wild Cherry. 4/5 stars. Wild Cherry is a poetry book I’ve been totting around for 2 months but have had no energy to pick it up. I’ve been very depressed that I haven’t had time to read, and despite me falling asleep right now, I forced myself to read it. It felt very repetitive after a while with her constant calling back to long lost love, death, and April, but I appreciated the 1923 themes that were NO doubt soo popular.

124. Through the Woods: 5/5 stars. A horror comic book that reminds me a lot of “Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark.” I lent it to my co-worker since he loves these types of stories!

125. Dancing with Mr. Darcy: 1/5 stars. I read the first story which was Jane Austen crossing the River Styx and facing her judgement and then I tried to read the rest and it was all so fucking boring??? I put the book down and will not be continuing.

126. The Night Diary: 5/5 stars. So this was an audiobook I listened to during the week I had awful vertigo. I couldn’t go to work or university and I laid on the couch, glasses off, just listening to this story. If it hadn’t been read to me, I don’t think I would have loved it as much. It follows Nisha who is forced to leave after WWII when India is split into New India and Pakistan. All muslims are allowed to stay, but all Hindus must leave for New India because of territorial wars. It follows the dreadful path during the desert, the violence they faced, and the child’s innocence slowly being robbed from her. It’s all told through Nisha’s diary who pens it to her mother. The voice actor did a wonderful job.

127. We Contain Multitudes: 5/5 stars. Tiny twink nerd falls in love with Giant Jock football star. And then he falls in love with the nerd and they’re hormonal and coming out and angst with love. I understand why people are upset with the novel: the plot twist seems like a total cop out that the author placed and a 15 year old dating a 18 year old can get borderline statutoary rape. However, I absolutely loved this book. It was refreshing to have a “coming out” narrative that wasn’t focused on coming out, but rather these two boys falling in love through letters, reading the cringe of HS romances, and desperately following these boys through it all. It’s definitely a favorite I read this year!

128. Lovely War: 4/5 stars. This is the third book I read while going through vertigo, and my second audiobook. It’s set during WWI, following two love narratives but told through the perspectives of the Greek God. It was really refreshing, the voice acting was excellent, and I really enjoyed listening while dizzy constantly. I would have given in a 5 star rating, but near the end, Hazel’s pixie-manic girl stereotype was getting out of hand and her hypocrisy was really fucking annoying. However, up until that point, I really enjoyed it and recommended it to several friends!

129. The Assassination of Brangwain Spurge: 4.5/5 stars. I really struggled not giving this book five stars, but I thought some of the narration and story-telling could have done a tiny bit better. This was a great audiobook to listen to while I packed and finished projects before my plane ride to my first ever work conference. I was bummed out that I couldn’t listen to this audiobook on the plane because Libby requires wifi, but I really enjoyed the fantasy comedy of this book (even though fantasy tends to be a topic I don’t dare approach because it just through you into a world with no explanation). 10/10 would recommend to strangers on the street.

130. Aaron and Ahmed: 4/5 stars. I read this books during my great “aaaAH I’M GRADUATING TIME IS UNREAL” So these will be short. A story about after 9/11 and the brutality American soldiers went to gain answers, even if there were none.

131. The Tea Dragon Festival: 5/5 stars. Dragons? Tea? LGTB+? Who could ask for more??

132. Roadqueen: Eternal Roadtrip to Love: 5/5 stars. Lesbians calling out how trashy other lesbians treat girls who generally like them. “Fuck Boy” was used a lot and I loved this.

133. Skull-face Bookseller vol. 1: 5/5 stars. A skeleton tries to sell manga and explores the crazy customers who come in, the social mistakes foreigners make with Japanese booksellers, and Honda-san doing her best to survive in her job.

134-136. Beastars Vol 1-3: 5/5 stars. I saw a bit of the anime and realized there was a manga. I bought the two volumes I could and then the third one from amazon. I really enjoyed this series and look forward to reading it more!

137. I hear the Sunspot Vol 2: 5/5 stars. It’s nice to see the couple going on, even if its GUT-WRENCHING and stupid how they refuse to communicate!!!!! But it hits hard topics of the community for the hard of hearing and functioning in a world where signing is considered not important enough to teach.

138. Pink: 5/5 stars. A sex worker who spends all her money feeding her alligator and the trouble she gets into. Weird art style and at first I opened this book and didn’t buy it. 3 months later, decided to buy it and I adored it.

139: Restless: 4/5 stars. I don’t remember much about it, but I think it was cute. Maybe boyfriends find each other again?

140. How can one sell the air?: 5/5 stars. I’ve had this “calling” to start really reading native american stories and heritage. This is a controversial book with Suquamish people as they either see their leader finally giving up or instilling courage to stay firm even as the world does their best to destroy them. I really enjoyed reading his speech.

141. Skull-face Bookseller Vol. 2: 5/5 stars. Honda-san comes back again with her friends and exploring working in the shop with more crazy customers but also with her new found fame being a manga artist.

142. Gold Rush Women: 4/5 stars. A lot of white women with these narratives, which was disappointing since most of the Gold Rush Women were indegenious or came from other areas of the world rather than just Europe or East America. Wish there were more stories on the black, mexican, indegineous, or chinese women who were forced into slavery or abused or helped create the west.

143. No one is too small to make a difference: 5/5 stars. Greta Thornberg amazes me. Here we have a 15 year old with aspergers who is doing her best to inspire scientists, politicians, and anyone in the world to take charge of our climate change issues. It also amazes me how many people are threatened by a 15 year old and she’s forced to repeat herself in her speeches because people refuse to listen to what she has to say. She’s amazing.

144. Ookami he no Yomeiri: 3.5/5 stars A bunny and a wolf get married. What more can I say?

145. Monody: 3/5 stars: Monody is a strange poetry book. The lyrical writing leaves lacking in terms of uniqueness and deep thought, but aesthetically it is beautiful. Blue font paired with geographical maps of Reno, Nevada, the poetry book comes off more of an art piece.

146. Usagi no Mori: 3/5 stars. Uhmmm. Don’t remember…

#2019 books #2019 book reviews #2019 book list #book reviews

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fitjourneydaily · 7 months

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Enhance Your Vision Naturally with Sightcare: A Comprehensive Review

In today's fast-paced digital age, our eyes are constantly strained by excessive screen time, environmental factors, and age-related changes. While there are numerous eye care products available in the market, finding a reliable and effective solution can be overwhelming. Enter Sightcare, a cutting-edge vision supplement designed to support and promote healthy vision naturally. In this comprehensive review, we will delve into Sightcare's benefits, reviews, ingredients, and how it can truly transform your eye health. Section 1: The Power of Sightcare Supplement Sightcare is a scientifically formulated vision supplement that combines the best of nature and research to deliver optimal eye health. It is specially crafted to provide vital nutrients and antioxidants that are essential for maintaining clear, comfortable, and sharp vision. Developed by leading experts in the field, every ingredient in Sightcare is chosen for its proven benefits in supporting ocular health. With regular use, this supplement can help alleviate common eye concerns and improve overall vision quality. Section 2: Unveiling the Benefits of Sightcare 2.1 Enhanced Visual Clarity: Sightcare's unique blend of ingredients works synergistically to improve visual clarity and acuity. By nourishing the retina and supporting the optic nerve, Sightcare helps reduce blurred vision and enhances focus, allowing you to enjoy sharper and more vivid eyesight. 2.2 Reduced Eye Fatigue: Prolonged screen time often leads to eye strain and fatigue. Sightcare's ingredients, such as Lutein and Zeaxanthin, combat the detrimental effects of blue light emitted by digital devices. This helps reduce eye strain and fatigue, ensuring your eyes feel refreshed even after long hours of computer use or smartphone browsing. 2.3 Protection Against Age-Related Vision Loss: As we age, our eyes become more susceptible to age-related vision problems, such as cataracts and macular degeneration. Sightcare's potent antioxidants, including Vitamin C and Vitamin E, protect the eyes from oxidative stress and free radicals, which are known to contribute to these conditions. By supporting eye health from within, Sightcare reduces the risk of age-related vision loss and helps maintain clear vision. Section 3: Sightcare Reviews - Real People, Real Results Sightcare has garnered rave reviews from users who have experienced remarkable improvements in their eye health. Here are some testimonials from satisfied customers: - "I've been using Sightcare for three months now, and my vision has never been better. My eyes no longer feel tired after staring at screens all day, and I can read without reaching for my glasses. Highly recommended!" - Jane S. - "After trying several eye supplements, I finally found Sightcare. Not only did it improve my overall vision, but I also noticed a significant reduction in eye dryness. It's like a lifesaver for my tired eyes!" - Michael W. Section 4: Unveiling the Key Ingredients of Sightcare 4.1 Lutein and Zeaxanthin: These antioxidants play a crucial role in maintaining healthy eyes. Lutein and Zeaxanthin naturally accumulate in the macula, a part of the retina responsible for central vision. By filtering harmful blue light and reducing oxidative stress, they protect the macula and improve visual performance. 4.2 Vitamin C and E: Sightcare incorporates these powerful antioxidants to neutralize free radicals and protect eye cells from damage. Vitamin C promotes collagen synthesis, which supports the health of blood vessels in the eyes, while Vitamin E helps maintain lens clarity. 1. Eye Health 2. Vision Supplements 3. Natural Eye Care 4. Sightcare Benefits Conclusion: Sightcare is a game-changer for those seeking to improve and maintain their eye health naturally. With its carefully selected ingredients, this vision supplement has earned praise for its effectiveness in enhancing visual clarity, reducing eye fatigue, and protecting against age-related vision loss. Backed by positive reviews from satisfied users, Sightcare is a comprehensive solution that can transform your eye health for the better. Embrace the power of Sightcare, and see the world through clearer, sharper eyes Improve your vision with SightCare – explore reviews and learn about its ingredients. Discover if SightCare really works and where to find it, including on Amazon. For more information, visit our website. Visit the SightCare Physical Product Product Page. Read the full article

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cookiefonster666 · 5 years

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Thoughts on the Homestuck Epilogues (Tumblr Edition)

I predicted the future!

Might as well adapt this Blogspot post I made about a week ago into Tumblr form, why not. With a few minor changes. I don’t like using Tumblr but I figure it’s a good additional platform to share my surprisingly positive views on the Homestuck Epilogues.

The epilogues have a lot of controversial content, most of which I avoid talking about here.

BRIEF SUMMARY

4/20, read through Meat: epilogues pretty good

4/20, started Candy: what the fuck

4/21, stopped: aaaaaaaaughhhhh bluh i hate everything

4/24-ish, continued Candy: epilogues alright i guess also i am sad now

4/27-ish, finished: I LOVE HOMESTUCK

BRIEF-ISH SUMMARY

Meat was a wild ride that started as cool plot stuff and things that make you go "OH FUCK", continued as basically chapters 7-9 of Detective Pony (which I naturally enjoyed a lot), and ended as a mess of sheer chaos and destruction. My thought process ended as, "oh duh, this is the bad ending, candy must be the good ending". I was in for quite the nasty surprise.

I quit reading Candy just a few pages in. It didn't take long for it to suddenly become the weirdest fanfiction ever. Frustrated, I started skipping and searching through later parts and got rather salty when it turned out both sides were the "bad ending". I saw firsthand what vfromhomestuck meant by "clear your whole week": this is not something most people can just read in one sitting. Then I recovered a few days and read Candy in earnest, in a somewhat anachronous order and with many parts read multiple times. Slowly, I started to hope that the epilogues would be followed up with a true happy ending for real this time. I may or may not have written a snippet of some form of fanfiction paving the way for a happy ending.

Once I finally accomplished the equivalent of reading Candy as intended, I got hit HARD with feels. I accepted that the epilogues have many issues but as a whole (not just the sum of parts) are an absolute masterwork, sometimes because of those issues. It didn't take me long to realize the brilliant duality either. Meat is a side-splitting metafictional farce that (for me at least) is impossible to treat as anything resembling a story of people doing things. Candy is a tale of FEELS, and I don't use the word FEELS lightly. FEELS means I almost cried, like I did when I watched the Futurama episode Luck of the Fryrish.

DETECTIVE PONY AND METAFICTION

Before I move on and talk about the CHARACTERS, I'm going to discuss the meat epilogue's resemblance to sonnetstuck's Detective Pony. I love everything about Detective Pony, more than almost anything else in existence. My abnormal love for that godlike fanwork probably skewed my perception of Meat a bit. Starting from page 17, Dirk takes over the narration then fights over it with god tier Calliope; both do rather questionable deeds and Dirk was hit hard by fans as a result. Seeing other fans react towards that character with such hostility gave me a very distinct feeling of "what, am I missing something?" Dirk's takeover felt like a lengthy work of comedy to me; a story that never strips away from the fact that it's fiction, in a vein near identical to that of Detective Pony. I like to think I am in the right for perceiving that arc this way, because I think everyone who has read Homestuck should read Detective Pony. One of the epilogue authors read Detective Pony after writing the epilogues and was struck by it; I take this accidental mirroring of (post-)canon as proof that sonnetstuck understands Hussie's ways through and through. I like to think I have a solid understanding of Hussie's ways by now, but this guy is on a whole new level.

That said, the meat epilogue gets a bit carried away with metafiction to the point of making me think, "god when will things go back to normal". Towards the end of Detective Pony, Dirk goes through an existential crisis followed by a powerful revelation, and then resolves to do whatever it takes to erase his abominable creation. But the meat epilogue ends with (both figurative and literal) crashing and burning; no ultimate redemption for our poor Strider. Homestuck doesn't usually have much of a problem with getting carried away with stupid nonsense; maybe a few rare occasions in cases like Hussie's self-insert scenes. But getting carried away is a major criticism I have with cool and new web comic. I love that comic to death, but the parts that take a long time to dwell on the cool and new characters being creepy or weird are a chore to go through. o (the author of CaNWC) seems to have improved in that regard; the cool and new trolls' arc is much more to-the-point with such nonsense.

Meat getting carried away with metafiction is a major cause of my initial burnout shortly after starting Candy. I was sick of this mass dump of metafiction and expected Candy to be a refreshing change of pace. Haha, if only. My fault for reading Meat first. At night I sometimes ponder in envy of the parallel universe me that started with Candy. Actually I don't do that, I just thought it was a funny thing to say. Though I have on more than a few occasions sat in bed fantasizing about how awesome my life probably is in some parallel universe. What point was I making again? Oh whatever, it doesn't matter. I guess I should write a similar overview of Candy's narrative nature. Here goes:

LUCK OF THE FRYRISH AND SADSTUCK

Sad things are sad.

^ There, that's my candy overview. How hard was that?

With the two summaries out of the way, I figure the best way to dump out my residual thoughts on the epilogues is going character by character. I won't do every character, mostly just the ones who played large roles and were already characters in Homestuck proper. I'm sorting these characters in tiers of how well I think the epilogues handle them, mostly from worst to best.

N-TIER

N is not the lowest tier; it's the tier that cannot be ranked. N stands for two things here: "Not Applicable" and "Narrators". Naturally enough, two characters fit into that tier.

Dirk Strider: I've already talked about this guy quite a bit. I have a fondness for Dirk's character and I think his dialogue and narration in meat do a good job portraying some ascended, ultimate version of his character without straying from his voice, the tone that makes him Dirk. That said, I'm a bit peeved that "normal Dirk", the one iteration of Dirk Strider that isn't total bonkers and just wants his friends to be happy, doesn't exist in this story. In Candy, Rose suddenly loses the memories of her alternate selves, but for some reason Dirk keeps those memories and soon after commits suicide; he's left out of the picture until Candy's postscript, which I guess is a reasonable balance considering his indulgence throughout Meat. But why is only one of the succulently verbose Strilondes let off the hook? Some readers imagine Dave as the comic's protagonist and Dirk as the antagonist; I've toyed with that idea myself and can see it symbolized, but it just feels so wrong to me. Maybe the authors did too good a job writing Dirk for me to be complacent with such a shift in role. His conversations with Rose were just as delightful as I had hoped and they aren't weighed down too much in light of his shift in role, at least not for me.

Alt Calliope: The narrative rival to Dirk, as I mentioned previously. I'm not totally sure what to say about her, other than that one could see her as a counterpart to let's say Anna Harley; a necessary piece in the Detective Pony analogy. Alt Calliope's narrative arguments with Dirk were hilarious and that's all there is to say on the matter.

G-TIER

I'm lucky Gamzee's name starts with a G, because this means I can give him a tier of his own worse than F. As an individual arc that is; he'd get a much higher rating when taken as part of a whole.

Gamzee Makara: Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. I despised reading every word that came out of this guy's mouth as soon as his """redemption arc""" started. But I can clearly tell that was the point and that the suffering that is reading his words has a much greater purpose. Before you deem me a masochist or the kind that insists everything is "bad on purpose", know that I am neither of those things but really do mean what I say here. Gamzee's role in Candy draws tension between individuality and the whole. Reading this guy's hogwash is suffering in and of itself, but ultimately it serves a role of showing us how fucked up the world of Candy is and helps the reader experience John's existential crisis with him.

F-TIER

As before, these tiers are strictly about character arcs in isolation and not the big picture. This tier is home to none other than the legendary...

Jane Crocker: Boy did I predict the future on that one. A bit like Dirk, I would've liked it more if in only one epilogue did sweet innocent little Jane become such a monster. No way in hell am I going to run through the asshole things she does; it's a load of sensitive topics I'm not comfortable discussing in any capacity. Instead, I'll say that if I had to choose only one epilogue where Jane ran through her crazy presidential campaign it would be Candy; as with Gamzee's arc, this campaign serves well as a part of John's existential crisis. What's weird here is that in Candy she originally cancelled all this, but later ended up basically doing it anyway with Dirk gone. I can imagine Jane going back to normal in Meat, maybe? Or in the hypothetical "true ending" I discussed prior.

D-TIER

Better known as "meh" tier. Mostly the characters that don't do much and I wished did more.

Meenah Peixes: Needed more screen time, god damn it. She survives the Furthest Ring apocalypse, nabs the Ring of Life, then makes her way to Candy Earth and joins Karkat in the rebellion. Maybe it makes sense that her and Karkat teaming up in war is relegated to the background, to show how far the shouty guy has come in comparison to everyone else. I'll come back to this point when I talked about Karkat.

Roxy Lalonde: Doesn't do too much in either side, but does go through some touchy topics I'm not sure what to think about; I'm most certainly not ready to talk about those topics now. And regardless, Roxy's role in the epilogues is better discussed when I talk about John and Terezi a few tiers up.

Calliope: Doesn't do all that much either, full circle to being the exposition alien with mysterious morality. I'm actually pretty OK with that. Certainly beats out the slog of endless "ur pretty" conversations. Calliope pretty much fades into the background on both sides, which is sad but fitting.

(About pronouns: I'll keep referring to Roxy and Calliope as "she" unless I find reason to talk about the little those two do in Meat. I just avoided using pronouns in those paragraphs above.)

C-TIER

Better known as "meh" tier, but with a more positive "meh" than before. It's the "meh" that indicates lukewarm satisfaction rather than annoyance at mediocrity.

Jade Harley: Really should be on a lower tier, because she did dick squat other than being horny and painfully oblivious to all the nonsense going on. But I'm a sucker for Jade being "Jade" and was happy to see even a trace of that early in Meat. As before, I'll avoid the controversial topics surrounding Jade in the epilogues, aside from pointing out that this post reads very different now.

Karkat Vantas: This guy's a bit of an odd spot. His leadership role is addressed in the absolute last way I expected. Could've gotten more attention from the story I suppose, but damn if his character arc didn't get the most triumphant return imaginable.

Kanaya Maryam: I touched upon Rose and Kanaya's relationship when I discussed the "buddy system" in my first epilogues post and I still stand by what I said there. Her strong attachment to Rose is integrated well into Meat without seeming like fluff or defining her entire character, because she actually does other things there too. In Candy they remain a stable happy relationship and I guess I'm cool with that.

Aradia Megido: Role is the same as ever and I'm fine with that. Death fangirl who works for predestination and has ambiguous morality. Her arc with alt Calliope ends with a cliffhanger that is easily the biggest reason to hope for a follow-up to the epilogues; if such a follow-up were to happen, I really look forward to hearing more from Aradia.

Sollux Captor: Sollux is by nature the other guy, that's an immutable fact of life. He doesn't do much other than snarking at whoever's nearby and I can't imagine it any other way.

Jake English: If not for a scene near the end of Candy, I'd put Jake at D-tier. Through all of Meat and most of Candy, Jake's role is one of the oddest spots of all and it's pretty hard to pinpoint what the authors were going for, lest I dabble in controversial topics some more. But Jake's scene with John near the end of Candy is uniquely touching and makes the most out of his role as a second John. He moves in with John, bringing his son Tavros with him, and encourages John to reconcile with his former wife and make amends of sorts, ultimately giving a small portion of the cast a pseudo-happy ending. That whole part of Candy made me tear up.

Talking about the really GOOD parts is a perfect point for me to move on to...

B-TIER

Stuff that didn't make it into A-Tier, which I've reserved for what struck me HARD.

Dave Strider: In both epilogues, Dave's behavior generally seems based on how he acted in Act 6 Act 6 Intermission 5, which is actually a LOT better than it sounds and hell if I know why that is. Dave's rants about politics and sexuality now have a charm I can't quite describe. His absurd fixation specifically on the economy matches shockingly well with the nature of Homestuck. The three-way romance between him, Karkat, and Jade goes in very different directions on either side, which I'll discuss a bit later. The epilogues even made Dave x Karkat an actually decent ship, how crazy is that??? The writers deserve a big badge of honor for doing that. Not sure what to say about specific things, but Dave was really well-written in an unexpected way.

Rose Lalonde: Again not sure what to say about anything in specific. Just really enjoyed reading Rose on both sides of the story. Shoutout to the heartwarming moment with John near the end.

A-TIER

Oh boy. Oh boy. Time for the big guns.

Vriska Serket: My mind hurts to process just how good Vriska's appearance in Candy was, after leaving the Furthest Ring and landing on Earth. First she talks with John rather aggravated, then she brutally murders Gamzee, then she sits down and has an honest talk with her ectobiological clone raised by Rose and Kanaya, and in the end gets in touch with Terezi which leads to a cliffhanger. The story somehow created the PERFECT balance of sincere reflections and typical Vriska flavor, which was deeply lacking in A6A6I5 with its horrific polar opposite versions of Vriska. Two Vriskas converse once again late in Candy and this time it's incredibly endearing and almost feels like an apology for the controversial Vriska/Vriska encounter back then. I accept the apology with open arms. Why is everything always so wonderful?

John Egbert: <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3. WHY IS EVERYTHING ALWAYS SO WONDERFUL? John gets a deep meaningful existential crisis arc in both epilogues; both cases I easily latched onto and found a bit of myself in. I absolutely loved seeing him and Terezi interact as a duo of people with some perception of canonicity; I'll get back to that point soon enough. John's marriage to Roxy not working out is a testament to both his issues with canon and Roxy's issues dealing with harsh situations. Roxy latches onto John and their son as a huge carefree pushover and he doesn't like that at all. And that's actually cool with me because John x Terezi is better in every way, as the epilogues made me realize. If that wasn't enough, the end of Candy spoils our little hearts by having John reconcile with Roxy anyway and give hope for a better future. Though a part of me does want to see a true happy ending where John and Roxy date with their delightful dynamic from their first interactions, I'm beyond pleased with the epilogues' handling of John either way. Swaying deep into some rather sad territory while remaining 100% faithful to his character that I've always loved so much.

Terezi Pyrope: FUCK YES FUCK YES FUCK YES FUCK YES FUCK YES. Every scene with Terezi in the epilogues was so goddamn awesome. Her interactions with John were such a blast to read, with exactly the mix of humor and touching aspects that make both of the big John/girl ships what they are. How did the authors pull it off, making deeply emotional scenes without ever sacrificing that goofy Terezi flavor???

S-TIER

S in rating systems these days is way misused in my eyes. Normally A is meant to be the highest rating and S is used for the very rare absolutely exceptional case A doesn't do justice. But now you see shit like SS, SSS, SSSS everywhere like one S isn't the ultimate badge of honor? S is a rating I'd gladly give Detective Pony and may or may not give cool and new web comic. Same goes for my very favorite Futurama episodes. I'd give a few of Neil Cicierega's works that rating if I'm feeling up to it. In this post, I've reserved the S rating for:

Barack Obama: THE BEST PART OF THE EPILOGUES, HANDS DOWN. His conversation with Dave near the end of Candy is perfect in every way, it really transcends words. Humor, emotional touching, plot revelations, and straight up "Homestuck feel" are blended into the most delicious melting pot imaginable. When Dave confesses that he might be gay and explains troubles in his three-way romance, Obama responds with a truly inspiring speech about identity that raises an excellent point about the differences between the epilogues involving aspects of people that may seem immutable to some. I think Obama's speech leaves a powerful message I never expected Homestuck of all things to convey so well. I hope readers take that speech's message into account, though I know many will probably be a bit naive about it.

If you refuse to read the epilogues at all costs, then I implore you to read Dave and Obama's conversation anyway. You won't be disappointed.

CONCLUSION

epilogues good

that’s all there is to say on the matter

though if you don’t like them that’s also fine

#homestuck #homestuck epilogues #epilogues #epilogues spoilers #homestuck epilogues spoilers #i predicted the future #i love john egbert #i love terezi pyrope #i maybe love vriska serket???#obama obama obama #johnrezi #yes good

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maculategiraffe · 6 years

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OK, darlings, bear with me. I'm almost ready to post the new chapter of Refreshment, but first I gotta get this Hill House thing off my chest.

This post will not contain specific plot spoilers, but it will discuss-- arcs, and themes. So if you haven't watched it yet and are already planning to and don't want any more information before watching it than "so far it's my favorite thing in awhile" and "it's so goddamn good, I cast myself down and wept," then maybe avoid this one until after you've watched it. (Or skip it altogether! I'm gonna get long-winded here, I can feel it.)

If, on the other hand, you aren't sure yet whether you want to watch it, and you want to know more about what the viewing experience might be like and why I found it to be so good, then this would be a good thing for you to read before watching it, maybe, to help you make up your mind whether it's for you.

Or if you've already watched it, then just, here's why I loved it.

One: It's not an adaptation; it's a lovingly transformative fan work.

You know how gleeful we all got about the fact that The Shape of Water was literally Guillermo del Toro's Cold War AU Creature/Kay fix-it fic of The Creature from the Black Lagoon? Because fuck yeah, beautifully shot high-budget fanwork that develops and builds upon themes and possibilities latent in the original work and wins Oscars in its own right?

I really love the book The Haunting of Hill House, and I'm predisposed to hate adaptations of things I really love, because they always fucking get things wrong. I've become a bit more open-minded about this as I've aged-- I will now grudgingly watch a Jane Eyre adaptation with a blue-eyed Rochester (although I still get so Goddamn Pissy about how Goddamn Pretty everybody always is in a Jane Eyre movie adaptation when both the romantic leads are canonically Changeling-Looking Motherfuckers, and that's, like, IMPORTANT, okay)-- but mostly adaptations seem to me to have missed an important point about the original. At LEAST one! Do you know what I mean? Like in the movie of The End of the Affair where they made it so the guy she was secretly meeting with was a priest, and like... the whole POINT was--! Or like remember how mad certain people got about Tom Bombadil being left out of LotR, and how much they (we) wanted to explain to you (anyone who was like "meh, fair enough, he didn't have much to do with anything anyway") that the whole POINT of Tom Bombadil was--!

Anyway sorry the point is, that this isn't an adaptation. It isn't The Movie Of The Book, or The Show Of The Book, which always gets things wrong. (Except the movie of The Princess Bride, which in my view was essentially the second, improved draft of the novel.)

It's a fanwork, about the book, and, like all great fanworks, it gets the book-- in some ways, yeah, I'll say it-- righter than the book itself did. Because it loves the book, and it takes things that are peeping out at the corners and between the lines of the book, or merely glanced at by the text and hurried past, maybe for pacing purposes, or that you thought about when you were reading the book for the seventh time, and it develops those, and interacts with them, and brings them out into new contexts, and-- just, altogether, instead of being like watching an adaptation of a thing you loved, it's like reading a fantastic fanfic series of a thing that you loved. Instead of watching it butchered, you get to watch it, skillfully and thoughtfully and thoroughly, loved, and in a way that you wouldn't have known how to by yourself.

Two: It's scary like wasabi is hot.

I love wasabi, because, like many very strange humans whose behavior is a puzzlement and a dismay to rational plants everywhere, I like eating something that makes me feel like my head is going to explode, but unlike some of those strange humans, I don't like the pain to linger. I avoid super-hot chilis, because I don't like a burnt-mouth feeling. I like wasabi because while I'm eating it it makes tears stream down my face, but then once it's gone, it's gone. Well, I like my stories like I like my wasabi-- super intense while they last, but with a discrete ending to the pain. I love wallowing in exquisitely painful hurt/comfort depictions of a character's anguish and terror and desolation, because I know the comfort part is coming. If it doesn’t, I feel kind of hurt and burnt.

Well, I like my horror the same way. I like things that scare the living starlight out of me while they're happening, but that wrap up in a way that leaves me not-scared for later. My previous best example of this was probably The Others (remember The Others? Nicole Kidman? 2001? I never hear about that movie any more, I feel like it's really underrated. I saw it in the theater and there was one moment when everyone in the theater collectively stopped breathing and then everyone let out this crazy collective shaky what-was-that laugh), but I also feel that way about The Babadook, and Alien, and-- I could probably list other examples, but you get the point. I like Cabin in the Woods, but it (and others like it) work by defusing the horror while stuff is happening, which is different from movies that commit wholeheartedly to scaring you while they're happening but after you're done watching them don't leave you scared to go to sleep in case the Thing is under the bed or peering out of the mirror. You know?

Hill House ends that way, but-- disclaimer-- it's a 10-episode series, and if you stop watching at any point before the last episode, like I did, you might be creeped out and have to sleep with the light on, like I did. (After, specifically, episode 5. I already loved it but it had spooked me out badly.) It is genuinely terrifying while it's happening, but it gets-- steadily, artfully, beautifully-- less scary as it goes along. But not by becoming less intense. The ratio of emotional intensity to spooky business steadily increases, until at the very end, you are far too busy sobbing your soul out onto your sweater to be scared.

which brings me to my next item:

Three: It's a deep, and deeply cathartic, exploration of how grief and trauma work.

Do you know the quote-- I think I've reblogged it here a couple of times, lemme just, here:

My therapist says I can’t

make the monsters disappear

no matter how much I pay her.

All she can do is bring them

into the room, so I can get

to know them, so I can learn

their names, so I can see clearly

their toothless mouths,

their empty hands,

their pleading eyes.

So that's what it's about.

It's not about how there was never anything to be afraid of at all. It's not about how the monsters can't hurt you unless you believe in them. That's part of what the show looks at, is denial, how corrosive it can be, and in what ways, to deny the reality of what happened to you and how much it hurt you and how it changed you, and how important the things were that you lost, and how different you are because of what's happened to you, and what's still happening. And yet how understandable it is, to try to close your eyes to it, try to white-knuckle it away, fix it yourself, close the door on it, build a wall to block it out, make yourself blind to everything so you don't have to see the one unbearable thing.

It's not about how the monsters can't really, or won't really, or didn't really, hurt you.

It's about learning to understand how they can, and how they did, and how they do, and what they are, and that's the beginning of learning how you're going to live now. And that you are. And that-- and how-- it's going to be beautiful.

Four: It's about love.

The ways love is messy. The ways love makes mistakes. The ways love fails. The ways love oversteps. The ways love overwhelms. The ways love, when accompanied by fear or bad judgement or incomplete information or the other ways we all stumble so helplessly through life, can even lead us to hurt and harm people. Beloved people. Or be horribly hurt by them. The ways love is not, in and of itself, a safeguard against doing the absolutely, catastrophically, unbearably, unfixably wrong thing.

And the ways love lights our path. The ways love brings us back. The ways love makes life, no matter how much it hurts, worth living. The ways we can't do without it, nothing means anything without it, no matter how much it hurts-- and it hurts, it hurts, it hurts-- but that's what it is to be alive at all. To be able to feel, and feel deeply. To rejoice, and despair, and panic, and regret, and hope, and grieve, and breathe, and love. And love.

That’s what it’s about.

#the haunting of hill house #and why i loved it very much #an essay by maculategiraffe age 35 #grief #horror #love love love

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2pcontinued · 6 years

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A Silent Symphony

Standing at the edge of a ballroom, the beautiful golden chandelier holding many bright candles that illuminated the entire room, you watched longingly at the dance floor. How you wished to be there, waltzing the night away with a handsome stranger. Of course, you could, but lord knows you would be in a load of trouble for doing so. So for now, you simply watched. At least your uniform was cute, even if it was a but uncomfortable. A pair of black mary-janes were shown on your feet, while on your actual body you wore a black frilly dress that stopped at just below your knees, with a white band going around and cinching your waist, and short puffy sleeves that connected to the more modest version of a sweetheart neckline that was also decorated with frills. A pair of plain white stockings covered your legs. Your hair was pulled into a low bun, tied with a white ribbon, and you wore white gloves over your usual rough hands, due to the labor the master of the estate required you to do. Little did you know, a pair of eyes were watching you from afar, staring intently at your simplistic figure, with a look of interest.

Some time later, while you were escorting a guest to their designated room in the estate due to them drinking a little too much of the selection of refreshments you served during the ball, you had walked up to the third floor of the mansion to drop them off. Once you had left them in their room a drunken mess, you started to begin to go back to the party to finish the rest of your job. As you were walking back down the stone staircase, a small melody filled your ears. It was very quiet, almost nonexistent, but still prevalent enough for you to be able to hear it clearly. You stopped in your tracks for a moment, unable to choose your next course of action, yet settled on a decision mere seconds later. Nodding your head, you decided to follow the sound. You knew this land like the back of your hand, so nothing you discovered would be new to you, not to mention, you were always doing the same thing all the time every day, so a change of pace would be inviting. Your shoes clacked against the stone pavement of the stairs you were walking up, currently leading you to the second to last floor, floor five. Once you had arrived at your destination, you opened the brown wooden door at the top of the flight of stairs, and walked down the corridor slowly, making every step you made as silent as possible. The music only got louder. The wallpaper decorating the hallway was a lovely blush pink, with a small off-white stripe marking every every six inches or so of the wallpaper. The floor now had baby blue carpeting, a color you had always found to be joyous and quite adorable, the color itself expressing youth and innocence without even using a picture. Passing every door, you noticed that the music was coming from the very last door at the end of the hallway. It didn’t exactly make sense, since that room had always been vacant every time you had cleaned it, but it wouldn’t hurt to check. It’s not like you got a bad feeling from the situation anyway, because if it had, you would have stopped a long time ago. You trust your instinct with every fiber of your being, as it has never steered you wrong before.

Reaching the final door, pure white with small pink roses decorating the edges, you grabbed the brass knob, and turned it in your hand gently. Pushing the door open, a beautiful scene filled your sight. The usually ugly fading avocado green wallpaper had been replaced with a pristine white wallpaper instead, as the moon lit up every dark crevice of the room. Gold trimmings decorated the connecting area of the floor and wall, and a large white and gold rug covered part of the floor, as a shiny dark brown hardwood floor peeked from underneath the item. On the left side of the room, trays upon trays of pastries and the most delicious smelling sweets sat on top of a table with a white tablecloth, and pink roses occasionally decorated the table, completely snipped from their stems and the flowers left untouched and oddly perfect. The finest wines and drinks stood next to the sweets on the table, along with a chocolate fountain, what you may say is arguably the best addition to any dessert table. A large window removed of it’s glass with a curved top allowed the full moon to show, it’s holy light shining upon the magnificent display before you. A man stood near this window, not very tall in height, only reaching about 5’6 at most. His back was facing you, however you could see his strawberry blonde hair glisten in the moonlight.

“Excuse me sir, I don’t think you’re allowed to be here.” You spoke, a little unease in your voice, due to the stranger standing across the room from you. He turned around, and you were able to fully take in his features.

What he lacked in height, he made up for in pure and absolute beauty. Extremely fair skin, slightly littered with freckles, as well as deep and sensitive eyes that resembled the color of sapphires when the sunlight hit them, filled your view. Thin, yet plump pink lips with a slight cupid’s bow as their shape, and a button nose that looked almost too tempting to touch with the tip of your finger. His eyebrows, slightly bushy yet well groomed, and long eyelashes framed those mesmerizing eyes of his. His face was slightly rounded, with his chin coming to a small point, his body looking a bit plump and more on the well-fed side, showing his status in society, and providing an explanation for his adorable somewhat chubby cheeks. He was wearing a soft pink waistcoat with a matching pink tailcoat, and a baby blue bow tie. A white wing-collared dress shirt was tucked into neatly pressed cream-colored pants, and he was wearing white gloves, while on his feet were white dress shoes. My god, was he gorgeous. And he was staring directly at you.

A smile graced his perfect lips, yet he didn’t expose his teeth. The music continued to play in the background.

“I’m terribly sorry, my dear, but I was hoping that I could stay a bit longer in here, if you don’t mind.” His voice had an English accent, something that charmed you further about this man.

“Actually, I don’t mind at all.’ You had no idea what you were saying, of course you minded, you could get punished for this, but something about the air around you made you change your mind. ‘I’ll leave you to it, then. Excuse me for interrupting.”

As you were about to grab the doorknob to leave again, a sharp wind passed you and you felt your freehand being grasped in another’s.

“I would actually enjoy it, if you stayed for a little while with me. I don’t like to be alone.” His hand was freezing cold, as if you were holding a cube of ice instead of the hand of another person. His voice was genuine and softened, showing that he wasn’t lying. At least you hoped he wasn’t.

Nodding your head, he didn’t let go of your hand, but instead turned you around to face him, palm touching palm, fingers intertwined. Your face burned up like the Sahara during the day.

He smiled at you, teeth barely exposed, but enough to show off some of his pearly whites. Even his teeth were perfect.

“Shall we dance?” He asked, and due to the close proximity, you could smell the faint scent of strawberry coming off of the man. You were so close, you could nearly count every single one of his individual freckles on his face. Maybe that wouldn’t be such a bad way to spend a lazy early morning.

“Yes, we may.” He gave you a reassuring look, then the song began to change. Wait, there was no piano or record player, so who was playing the music? You had no time to think, as he pulled you closer to him, you started to shift and turn in synchronization, one-two, one-two, feet moving together gracefully. Your dress swished all around you, and you could feel the air blowing past your face as you two moved together swiftly. It seemed as though he had you under a trance, your movements completely mimicking his, following his lead completely, not even thinking about anything else but the dance and keeping up with him. As the song began to end, he dipped you down, and you could feel his face nearing the left side of your neck, at a steady pace, slowly but surely making it’s way to the tender meat that was your flesh. Your eyes were closed softly, your head falling back, somewhat sleepy in your state, not fully conscious in a way.

Once he had gotten close enough, he began to open his mouth, and sink his teeth into your delicate skin. Close, so close he could almost taste it, which he could. Almost. Just as his fangs were about to pierce your skin, your eyes pushed themselves open, a look of anger written on your face, and you glared at him. You snapped your neck and head back up while he maneuvered his away from yours to avoid your head impacting his, and messily pushed him away from your body. The blonde looked surprised, and a little amused, to say the least.

You lifted your leg up and attempted to kick him, yet in a flash, he was gone again, in front of the window you had found him in when you first walked through the door. Raising your fists up to protect yourself, your gaze hardened and eyebrows furrowed, as a hard frown set itself upon your features.

“Who are you, and what did you do to me, you sick man.” Your voice held no hesitation and no fear. You were ready to kick someone’s ass if need be.

The man simply giggled, and grinned at you, revealing his full set of teeth.

“My god..” You whispered to yourself, as you saw rows of fangs lined up on the sides of his mouth, the sharpness of them terrifying you to no end.

“What’s wrong, poppet? Are you surprised?’ His voice came out like velvet, yet held a dark undertone that you despised. He continued. ‘Let me introduce myself, then, to the pretty lady.”

As he said that, he jumped backwards into the window and landed slowly, floating like a feather onto the ledge, and bowed his head down to reach his waist, then lifted his head back upright. His tailcoat swished dramatically behind him. What a show-off.

“I am Oliver Kirkland, a powerful vampire! And you were supposed to be my next meal, my dear.” This part caused your eyebrows to rise and your shoulders to tense, but you stood your ground. No way in hell you were backing down now. Even if his voice got oddly high-pitched during this moment, and it aroused worry in your body.

“However, you, my love, resisted my charms at the last minute. How fun!’ He paused for effect, and lifted his right hand to his chin, stroking it thoughtfully, before he begun again. ‘I have a feeling we will meet again, dearest (Y/n), so, until then! Toodle-loo!” And with the wave of his hand, he was completely gone, as if he vanished in mid-air.

When he left, the entire room changed once more. The walls returned to it’s previous deteriorated state, the floors dusty and rickety, creaking under your body weight, and the treats gone. The room was completely silent.

“How did he know my… Where was the music coming from…” You questioned yourself aloud, knowing that you would probably never find the answers if he didn’t give you the answer. Well, this was beginning to get a bit too personal for you. Collapsing against the aforementioned nasty green wallpaper-covered wall, you sat on the floor, your knees pressed against your chest, the moonlight seeping inside from the window barely hitting the tips of of your shoes. A chill ran down your spine. You might need a drink or two to finally begin to process what had just happened.

(This is for anon! My first ever halloween event request fulfilled, so thank you for allowing me to fulfill your request, and have a lovely day!)

#2p england #halloween event #2p hetalia #drabbles

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crazyaboutto · 6 years

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Marvel’s Video Game Universe (I know it doesn’t exist but what if it did)

I will be talking about my wish for Marvel Game Universe (MGU). There is no news about something like this happening but I wish it did. I recently watched CATFA again because Endgame is coming so it is time to refresh memories. I am also writing MCU timeline. Did you know that Tony fought with Obadiah Stane on Mat 24 in 2008? I didn’t notice this before. Anyways…

Outline of what I will be talking about:

Spider-man (SM) PS4

Captain America The First Avenger (CATFA)

Other Avengers’ game opportunities

· Tony Stark/Iron Man

· Natasha Romanoff/Black Widow

· Avengers

· Guardians of the Galaxy

Square Enix’s Avengers project

ON TO MGU

I still haven’t finished Spiderman PS4 because I want to finish it with %100 in spectacular mode and the scenery is breathtaking. I want to enjoy every second of this game so I am not rushing anything. This game is perfect in so many aspects: story telling, the way it handled characters and relationships, the graphics, game play, the music (it made feel like SM, I wish to swing in NYC lol), the pace and the way that they utilized collectibles. I will not dwell on this because the main focus is MGU. We will be getting SM2 in PS4 and it will be one the last PS4 games to be produced. In this game we have so many easter eggs such as buildings (Doctor Strange’s Sanctum Sanctorum and Avengers Tower). We also played as Mary Jane Watson and Miles Morales whom had great story arcs btw. It also forced us to play stealth in some points. Generally the games don’t care this. You would knock out every goon whether with stealth or just jumping in and destroying everyone (this is something I do if I am not forced to do stealth).

I had to clarify this before going into MGU.

CATFA is great opportunity to make an awesome video game. Imagine Wolfenstein like setting: futuristic Nazi vs the main player. Here is what it can be:

· An RPG game in WW2 setting. At first, the enemy is just Nazi but then they discover HYDRA.

· An open world game setting. The open world would be Brooklyn, Steve’s army training place (Camp Lehigh) and Europe. You would infiltrate HYDRA bases and destroy them. In some cases stealth would be compulsory.

· At some points, you could play as Peggy Carter and Bucky Barnes (like SM PS4 did with MJ and Miles)

· Before the final confrontation, the game would have “point of no turn” point so you could go back and try to do all side missions etc.

· Now the story mode:

at first Steve is skinny just like in the movie, you would develop basic skills at this point. And also you would develop relationships with characters until this point:

Then Cap wouldn’t have story missions, only side missions and some collectibles would be unlocked (the stuff that can be done without fighting) and also we could play as Peggy in some parts (Peggy’s story mode like MJ and Miles’ in SM PS4) until this point:

Then we would get our first stealth mission in HYDRA bases. After this mission, HYDRA bases would be unlocked like the Fisk/Sable/Demon/Criminal bases in SM PS4. the first stealth mission:

At the end of this mission we would have the first encounter with Red Skull. Of course it wouldn’t as short as the one in the movie. Just look at these scenes. Don’t they just fit in a video game?:

After this, like I said before, HYDRA bases would be unlocked. Maybe there could be different types of HYDRA bases. one for prisoners, one for experiments, one for weapons etc.. Later we would get to this scene. You know what happens here. I think playing as Bucky here would be emotional. Also playing as Bucky right before his captivity in HYDRA base would be good too:

After this we go to “point of no turn”. I want to say that this scene is fit for video game:

And then we would have final mission on the Valkyrie. It should be stealth (compulsory):

And of course the great finale:

I know this is a rewind of the movie but I couldn’t think of a game story. I just say what could have happen if the movie was a video game. then Steve would wake up in future for Avengers game.

Now on to other games

Iron Man

Iron Man game would be good too. For example it would start in that cave and the player needs to search the area to build their own suit. This game would be more about technology and upgrades IM would get. He would go to terror zones to save citizens and fight Ten Rings and set up the real Mandarin. I can’t say much but IM game wouldn’t have stealth. It should make the players feel like flying.

Black Widow

This one would rock the game franchise. She is a spy and assassin. We would have an amazing stealth game. If it is interactive, it would be better. Like you would pick who to trust other than the ones that are compulsory. You could try to find the other spies. Think about the infiltration opportunities... and assassination missions... Can’t say anymore. These two would be more than enough for me to buy that game. Game setting would be in Russia and America.

Avengers & GOTG

This one would be multichapter game. Like injustice and mortal kombat but this would be RPG. You could play as every Avenger and Guardian. It would have trouble with pacing tough. I can’t think anything for Thor, Hulk and Hawkeye. But Hawkeye can be in BW’s game or get a game of his own with spy/assassin genre. Hulk is destructive. The only game mode I can think for him is fighting game like MK. Thor’s game would be hard to do because he is the God of Thunder. He is OP.

The story could be like the mobile game, Marvel’s Future Fight. You should check out its story to understand.

Square Enix’ Avengers Project

I don’t have any hopes of this game anymore. They were supposed to release this in 2018 but we don’t even have a trailer or a description in 2019. This is a dead end. FUCK YOU SQUARE ENIX!!!!!

FINALLY

I don’t have stories for the things I’ve said but just think of the opportunities! The game engines are excellent. They look really realistic and I love that. Sorry, not sorry, Marvel vs Capcom but I prefer graphics like Injustice 2 & Mortal Kombat X. In 2020 or 2021, we will get PS5 and the engines will support better quality although I can’t imagine it at this point. We have an amazing game like SM PS4 and in that Avengers already exists so it would not be a problem to build a Marvel Game Universe with the start up of SM. MCU is thriving and this would also affect game sales because the fans that weren’t into games might buy it too. As far as I know there isn’t any game franchise that merges the characters from previous games. Avengers (2012) was game changing movie. It assembled the characters from other movies in MCU. Was it done before MCU? No (correct me if I’m wrong). So I think MGU would have same affect. I really wish they set up a game universe.

Thank you for reading this!

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nobszone · 6 years

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A midterm night’s dream

So as my American followers know, we have an election tomorrow. Rather exciting isn’t it? I can say I’ve thoroughly enjoyed the run up to this one, though it took a while to really get going.

Anyway, before we all go to the polls, I’d like to share a rather...interesting experience I had last week.

(Also a thousand apologies to Jonathan Pie, whose writings this story is ripping off inspired by).

The story begins last week, November the 1st. It had been a busy day. It was the day after Halloween which meant everyone was rushing to put away the pumpkins and deck the halls, gamers everywhere were getting ready for the start of Blizzcon the next day (only to be inevitably disappointed when Blizzard pulled a Konami) and the entire internet had learned what I had known for years; the most powerful Smasher was The Pink Nightmare.

But it had also been a very busy few months. The Midterm Elections had been circled on many an American’s calendar ever since January 20, 2017. A lot of things had been happening in the American political sphere this year, and there was a palpable sense of anticipation for the Midterms, and for good reason. This was, in many ways, the first major referendum on the job performance of Donald Trump.

So as you can imagine, this particular election was being framed as “The Most Important Election Ever.” But seeing as how the same thing had been said about the last several elections, I knew that for better or worse it would most likely be back to business as usual once it was over (for what passes as “usual” these days).

So on that day I had returned home from work, and when I opened my mailbox I was delighted to see my absentee ballot inside. Truth be told, I don’t really care much for standing in line at the polls and given that my ballot this year had quite a lot of things on it to consider, I really didn’t feel like standing in a voting booth for a good 30 minutes.

Even so, ever since I turned 18 I’ve never missed a chance to participate in our democratic process, and I wasn’t going to start now.

Now I know what you’re all thinking. How did I intend to vote? Well, this was a bit of a tricky proposition for me. I try my best to be an informed voter, reading up on the candidates and their stances on the issues and deciding for myself who’s platform I agree with more.

But this time I was going purely on instinct, and my instinct was to vote straight-ticket Democrat. Which really felt strange because, historically, my instinct has always been to do the opposite of whatever Michael Moore tells me to do.

I parked my car and opened the door to my house, with a spring in my step and my ballot in my hand. I was confident in my conviction that, despite some reservations, voting for the Dems in this election was the only sensible choice to make. And I knew it was the right choice, because my Facebook, Twitter and Tumblr feeds had been saying the same for months. Anyone who was anyone was telling me that only a racist, idiot or Russian spy would vote for the GOP in this election, so it must be true.

And besides, I had conjured up a fantasy in my head of Trump being so irate at a Democratic controlled house that he instantly resigned the Presidency out of spite.

This was going to be easy.

Well, it had been a long day at work, and it’s not a good idea to vote when your mind is fatigued. So I decided a quick nap was in order; and afterwards I would be refreshed and rejuvenated and ready to do my civic duty as a citizen of the Republic.

I set the ballot down on the counter and sprawled out on the couch and closed my eyes. I was home alone, and thus I felt no particular reservations about napping in the living room.

And then, something happened.

A voice began to speak to me. I became apprehensive and frightened. Who was it that was speaking? Was it my conscience? Was it God? Was it the first signs of schizophrenia?

Either way, I instantly knew who was addressing me.

It was the voice...of Princess Luna.

Now, don’t be alarmed. As long time followers know, I am an OG Brony. And as such, I occasionally experience visitations from the denizens of Equestria during times of emotional distress. Whether it’s Twilight Sparkle giving me encouragement before finals, Rainbow Dash assuring me that neither the last launch of the Space Shuttle nor the 2017 Solar Eclipse will be clouded out, or Vinyl Scratch giving me some companionship on those cold Winter nights, I’ve just gotten used to it.

But this was the first time I’d been visited by Princess Luna. The lunar regent herself! The only pony who’s presence in a dream actually made sense!

Time slowed, I sat up on the couch, rubbing my eyes blearily. But Luna remained standing in front of me, having adopted a humanoid form for a variety of Freudian reasons. Once again she began to speak.

“My friend, what troubles you?”

I sighed.

“I’m confused.”

An expression of sympathy crossed her face as she put a hand on her chest.

“Of course you’re confused. How can you not be? Everyone is confused. Because the only thing the media is talking about is what this means for Donald Trump.

“But there’s something missing. Information. How can you possibly make a decision if you’re not properly informed?”

She sat down beside me, taking my hand in hers.

“You and your fellow citizens have a tough choice to make. The GOP’s stance on immigration has been reprehensible, and Trump’s wish to mobilize troops is practically a Kent State-style situation waiting to happen. But despite his overtones, those migrants are not turning around. What happens to them when they get to the border? What happens if Trump ends birthright citizenship? And what about legal immigrants? If you sustain immigration at its current levels, what will happen to public services? Will Medicaid be able to cope?

“The economy is doing rather nice. Historically speaking, a good economy bodes well for the ruling party. But what about Trump’s trade war with China? Or the tax bill? Trump has often used the stock market as an indicator of how the economy is doing, but it lost nearly $2 trillion last month alone!

“And there’s so many other issues to consider as well. Will LGBT rights continue to be protected? Will your foreign policy change? Will gun rights be protected? There’s a lot to consider here.”

I held up a hand. “I know all these things, Luna. Why are you telling me this?”

“Because, you know the Republicans plans for these things. But, tell me my friend, have you heard anything from the Democrats about how they plan to handle issues?”

I paused. I thought about her question and realized she was right. I’ve heard how my local candidates would approach those issues, but in terms of a unified strategy from the Democrats?

I’d heard nothing.

Other than-

“All you’ve heard from the Democrats is that you need to vote for them so they can stop Trump. And yes, that very well could happen, but to what end?” Luna asked, finishing my thought.

She stood up and faced me.

“The real problem is nobody wants to admit that they don’t know what will happen if things stay as they are for two more years, let alone what will happen if there’s significant opposition to the President. Your country has never had a President like this before.

“The GOP says that they’ll advocate for Conservative views and values instead of constantly kissing Trump’s ring. But recent history tells us that’s not going to happen. Furthermore, the GOP has traditionally been in favor of a smaller government and a weaker executive branch, and now you’re in a position where the traditional Republican argument is being made by Democrats. And because everyone thinks that the GOP is a bunch of racists, Libertarians like yourself are scared of being labeled Pro-Trump by default!”

Luna began to pace around the room as she started to talk of fear. “This whole debate, if you can call it a debate, has been about causing fear!” she cried. And every time she said the word “fear”, she spoke in her Royal Canterlot Voice.

“The Democrats say that your democracy will be undermined by Trump’s authoritarian tendencies. Fear.

“Trump says that America will be overrun by caravans of migrants and masses of illegal aliens if the Republicans lose. Fear.

“Barack Obama says the character of your country is on the ballot. Fear.

“The GOP is not only ramping up the threat of illegals, but that a Democratic majority would wreck the economy. Fear or fear? Would you like some fear with your fear?!”

Luna paused. I sat upright, riveted to my seat.

“The level of debate during this process has been terrifying! It has exposed everything that is wrong with modern political discourse. Jane Fonda compared Trump to Hitler, as if that comparison has never been made about any politician since 1945, yet Fox News claims that liberal donors would rather the Democrats start a nuclear war, if that was the case then why would anyone vote for a party who could potentially destroy the planet?

“Emma Gonzalez says that the lives of high school students depend on who is elected, and Trump says a vote for Democrats is a vote for MS-13 to run wild. I always thought school shootings and MS-13′s criminal activities would happen regardless of who was in office, but no, silly me, apparently the GOP is allowing people to gun down kids, while paradoxically MS-13 supports more gun control legislation! Once again, a national political debate has descended into FARCE! ”

Luna’s voice reached a fever pitch. It felt like the entire world shook with the reverberation of each syllable.

“The right has completely abandoned its principles in favor of supporting a man with an ego the size of a planet and the intelligence of a gnat! And the left has made it all about personality over politics, emotion over logic, which is a laugh seeing as their candidate in the last election lacked both of those things!”

“This is the choice your country faces!” Luna exclaimed, her eyes burrowing into my soul and her voice shattering every molecule of air around me. “Vote for Democrats and you’re supporting Identity Politics! Vote for Republicans and you’re supporting Statism! IDENTITY POLITICS OR STATISM! FUCK ME, WHAT A CHOICE! YOU MIGHT AS WELL BE STUCK BETWEEN THE WEHRMACHT AND THE RED ARMY!”

The silence was nearly as deafening as the voice it succeeded. I sat there, looking Luna square in the eye, her face seemingly frozen in an intense glare.

And then I could look no more. I put my face into my hands and I wept.

She was correct. For all my enthusiasm and patriotism, we were at a morton’s fork yet again. My hope was that once the 2016 election was over, the polarization would die down as both parties sought to get on with the job. Instead it never ended. The GOP sold out to Trump and the Dems learned nothing from Clinton’s defeat.

“What do I do?” I managed to choke out. “What can I do?”

It was at this point that I felt Luna embrace me. Her arms wrapping around my back, gently rubbing like a mother soothing an upset child. Her head rested on my shoulder, her snout buried in the crook of my neck as she did her best to bring my emotions back to a more reasonable level.

“It’s alright, my friend.” She whispered to me. “You know what you must do...you always have.”

And then I opened my eyes. I was awake, and she was gone.

Even now, nearly a week later, I still can’t get my head around what happened. Sure enough when I woke up, I felt refreshed and in the correct mindset to cast my ballot.

But following the advice of the lunar regent, I abandoned my original plan and instead I took some time to brush up on the candidates and their platforms once more. Then I voted for the candidates that I felt would do the best job.

And I honestly can’t work out how I would’ve voted if I hadn’t taken that nap.

And now it’s your turn. Despite all the polls and predictions, we still have no idea how today is going to turn out. This time however, both sides share blame for the uncertainty.

What it comes down to is this. We’re nearly 2 years into Donald Trump’s attempt to “Make America Great Again”, but we still don’t know what that means. Maybe I’m being factitious though, because Trump and his hardcore base seems to know what it means. It means an America with walls on the borders and divisions among the populace, an America where you can’t trust anyone (especially any TV channel that isn’t Fox News), an America where potential interference from a hostile power is not only tolerated, but perhaps encouraged.

Doesn’t sound that great to me, but of course you’re free to disagree with that.

But the Democrats aren’t much better. What the hell is their plan for America? Have they thought of anything besides “Impeach Trump?” And what if the Mueller probe comes back and it turns out that even if Russia was running an operation to harm our country and people Trump knew were involved but Trump himself wasn’t, what happens then? Hope he invites a porn star to the Oval Office and do re-enactment the Lewinsky affair?

The problem is no one knows what the Democrat’s plans are, because they have no plan after “Impeach Trump.” In a related story, no one knows what “Make America Great Again” means because no one ever knew what it meant.

And, like it or not, this all falls at the feet of Donald Trump.

We were never supposed to vote for Donald Trump.

You know it, I know it, we all know it. No one thought we would vote for Trump. Even people that voted for Trump didn’t think we’d vote for Trump. That’s why the Democrats were so eager for him to get the nomination and didn’t particularly care that they screwed over Bernie Sanders for an utterly unelectable candidate in Hillary Clinton; they assumed an election against Trump wouldn’t mean a Trump win, but it did and instead we got the single biggest embarrassment of the Democrats since 1968.

Fast forward two years later, and really nothing has changed.

For the last two years, the level of debate has been appalling from both sides of the aisle. Both sides have to take responsibility for this. There haven’t been any facts. There’s been no debate about policy, proposals, nothing. It’s all been about who can say the most alarmist thing or pull off the sneakiest trick and get away with it.

Nothing that has happened over the last two years has been reasonable political debate. It’s more like a dream you have after you’ve done a fifth of Vodka and a No Mercy run on Undertale.

One involving Princess Luna perhaps?

#politics #American Politics #Midterm Elections #humor #jonathan pie #brony #bronies #mlp

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