#absolutely insane I may never recover

[fandomfairyuniverse]

Li Ming learning sign language. Li Ming bringing the festival to heart because he knows heart can’t leave. Li Ming speaking slowly and clearly so that heart can read his lips properly. Li Ming trying his best to make sure heart feels listened to because he knows how it feels when you don’t feel like you are-

[seungkw1]

love me right — ksy

♡ pairing: roommate!hoshi x afab!reader ♡ theme: smut [18+ mdni], humor ♡ wc: 4.1k ♡ warnings: oral (f. & m. receiving), unprotected piv sex (do not do this), multiple orgasms, a lil spit play, head pushing, thigh riding, somnophilia, cum eating/swallowing, cumming in pants, like 2 seconds of angst, praise kink, hs is down bad for reader, gendered pet names (baby, good girl, pretty girl, etc), bit of fluff at the end ♡ a/n: this is part 2 to make me !! finally got this written hope yall like <3

Ever since you sort-of-accidentally had sex with your roommate for the first time, he’s been nothing but a fucking menace. 

Not in a bad way - no, despite the fact that he's kind of an actual insane person he's always been and continues to be a very considerate and agreeable roommate. There's no problem with your living arrangements. 

The problem is how fucking insatiable he has become. 

You previously never thought there could be such a thing as too many orgasms, but Soonyoung really is testing your limits. You've never had so much sex in your life - and you're not mad about it by any means. But your roommate-turned-friend with benefits is absolutely, utterly, wholeheartedly obsessed with having his entire face buried in your pussy at all possible times. And you love every second of it. 

Sure, sometimes your clit kinda feels like it's gonna fall off. Most of the time you've barely recovered from the last set of two, three, four orgasms (the current record is six, a record he's determined to beat) before he’s back between your legs again. But the constant cunnilingus leaves you more sensitive than ever before - and the more you squirm beneath his tongue and scream and cry as he takes you to paradise, the more it gets him off. One time you were wailing his name so much that he actually came in his pants, fully hands-free. The man simply worships you. 

You've had various kink-related conversations over the past couple months of nonstop boinking, as these things come up. You wouldn't necessarily say Soonyoung is into anything too crazy (besides the occasional burst of tiger roleplay, anyway), but so far he's been enthusiastically down for everything you've expressed interest in. He’s the very definition of matching one’s freak. 

“You know what would be hot?” Soonyoung asks you one day, approximately two minutes after you woke up and emerged from your room.

“Good morning to you too,” you tell him through a sleepy yawn.

“What if,” he continues anyway, “hypothetically, I were to wake you up one day by eating you out?”

“Soonyoung is it nine in the morning,” you reply as you give him a dull glare. You go to make yourself a cup of coffee, but he extends a full mug to you. You take the cup - it’s fresh, piping hot. 

“Oh, thanks,” you say, surprised by the kind gesture.

“So?” he prods, eagerly awaiting your reply.

“I mean, yeah, I wouldn’t be mad about that,” you answer with a small shrug.

“NOICE,” he exclaims, pumping his fist in the air.

“BUT-” you quickly add. “That cannot be an everyday thing.”

“Right, of course not,” he agrees with a nod. “Soooo, when can I try it?”

“Well, I can’t tell you that,” you reply straightforwardly. “It’s supposed to be a surprise, that would like, defeat the whole point.”

A wide grin spreads across his face, but he shakes it off right away, playing it cool. 

“Okay cool, well I’ll keep that in mind,” he says, grabbing your hand and shaking it vigorously. “Pleasure doing business with you.”

You roll your eyes at him. 

“You’re so fucking stupid,” you gibe, but your face cracks into a smile. He pulls you in and kisses you. 

“Love you too.”

You freeze. 

You may have been intimate with him more times than you can count, but your relationship is strictly casual. You only kiss when you're fucking, and the words I love you have never once been uttered by either of you. You know he probably was saying it facetiously, but the way he said it was so nonchalant. So… realistic. You stare at him for a second, not knowing how to respond. His smile slowly drops. 

“Oh, sorry,” he apologizes. His ears immediately turn red with embarrassment. 

“No no it’s fine,” you babble, trying to backtrack. “I just wasn't expecting…”

“I was just kidding,” he responds. Then his eyes widen. “I mean not like that, it's not that-”

“It’s fine!!” you quickly interject before he can say anything else. “I know what you mean.”

“Sorry,” he murmurs again. He suddenly realizes he's still holding onto your hand - he swiftly lets go. 

“Thanks for the coffee,” you tell him politely with a smile, trying to change the subject. 

“Of course,” he replies, trying to smile back at you, but you can tell he's still sulky. He departs from the kitchen without saying another word. He emerges from his room about a minute later in athletic gear, his gym bag slung over his shoulder. 

“Off to workout already? I thought you were going this afternoon” you inquire, but he's already breezing past you. 

“Yeah, Mingyu just texted me and wanted to meet earlier,” he answers as he grabs his keys. 

It’s a bad lie, and you both know it. But you don't press him further. 

“Okay, have fun!” you say cheerfully. But an air of tension remains. 

“Thanks,” he replies, turning back to glance at you for only a brief second. 

“Hey,” you say softly. “Soonyo-”

He's out the door before you have a chance to finish even saying his name. 

You stand there for a few moments, staring at the front door, wondering if you've just fucked everything up. You didn't mean to, of course. You were just so taken aback by the stupid L word. It's not something you ever expected to hear coming from Soonyoung’s lips, not about you anyways. But now it has you thinking. Was he simply joking around? Or does he actually have… feelings for you?

A small blip of a thought enters your mind: and do you have feelings for him?

You push it away before you can think about it any further. 

The next few days are undoubtedly a bit awkward. Soonyoung is clearly avoiding you - not in a malicious way, but he just so happens to have business elsewhere whenever you're at home. 

You're mildly annoyed, but more so you're feeling gloomy about the whole situation. You never meant to do anything to push him away - near-constant fucking aside, Soonyoung truly is a good friend. And now you find yourself missing him. 

After an entire week of this nonsense, you decide to confront him. You pretend to be going to sleep, anticipating that he’ll spend some time alone in the common area. A few minutes later your hunch is confirmed when you hear the tv come on, its volume low. You quietly open your door and sneak into the living room. You approach the couch slowly from behind - when you arrive at it, you jump around and plop down next to Soonyoung. 

“FUCK,” he yelps, nearly jumping out of his seat.  “You scared me!”

“I'm horny,” you tell him bluntly, scooting up next to him. “Let me suck your dick.”

Soonyoung stares at you, looking into your eyes that are now mere inches from his. You can tell he desperately wants to say yes, but he resists. You give him a flirty look, trying to entice him. 

“Pleaseeeee?”

“Well, I was gonna watch a movie…” his sentence trails off, unfinished. He tries to shift his focus away from you, but his eyes keep flickering back to yours. 

“Seriously?” you ask, crossing your arms. “Since when do you turn down head?” 

“Y/n…”

You wait for him to continue, but he doesn't. 

“Yes?”

He looks you in the eyes again, then sighs. 

“I dunno, I’m just not in the mood right now,” he finally answers. He looks away sullenly. 

“Are you okay?”

He looks back at you. He clearly wants to tell you something, but he hesitates. 

“About the other day…” he finally speaks. He pauses, in case you have something to say. You don’t; he continues.

“I didn't mean to make things weird. When I said that I loved you.”

“You didn't,” you assure him. You note that he didn’t say anything about it not being true, but you try to ignore that right now. 

You take his hand in yours, patting it softly. He looks at you, surprised by the gesture. 

“I was being weird, that's on me.”

His mood cautiously lightens. “You sure?” he verifies. 

“100%,” you say with a nod. He smiles at you. 

“Now will you please put your dick in my mouth?” you request again, looking into his eyes seductively.  

A smile creeps onto his face. 

“I mean if you're gonna be this fucking hot…”

You give him a mischievous smirk. You tug at his tshirt; he immediately takes it off. He groans as you grab his dick through his sweatpants, his cock starting to harden instantly in response. One thing about Soonyoung - you can do the bare minimum and he’ll have a boner within five seconds. You lick your lips, stroking him slowly through the soft gray fabric. He lets out a deep exhale, relieved by your touch - it had only been a week, but he missed you badly. He craved your touch, craved how insane you make him feel. He drops his head back, his legs spreading as he settles into the couch, shifting his pelvis up so you have full access to his groin. You rub your hand over the thick bulge, squeezing and pulling lightly, causing him to let out a pathetic-sounding moan. He is putty in your hands. 

About a minute more of your over-the-pants handjob and Soonyoung is rock fucking hard. You slide off the couch, taking to your knees between his spread thighs. You pull at the elastic waistband, tugging it down over the pulsating bulge in his underwear. You place your mouth on him through the fabric, letting him feel your lips, your hot breath on him. 

“Stop teasing me,” he begs after you plant several more kisses on his clothed dick. “Please.”

You gaze up at him, your eyes filled with lust. You reach into his underwear, retrieving his cock, prompting further pathetic moaning. He is leaking with precum - you take him in your fist, stroking up and down at a pace that he finds painfully slow. You place your lips atop the head, lightly sucking up his juices. He cries out as you then swirl your tongue over his tip.

“Aaaah,” he groans, his voice turning gravelly.

You grab his balls and take the rest of the head into your mouth. You hollow your cheeks as you begin sucking on it slowly - each motion of your lips long and drawn out. Saliva accumulates in the back of your mouth - and an overwhelming wetness accumulates in your underwear.

You draw your head back, gazing up at Soonyoung submissively. You collect your saliva, spitting it onto his cock - it trickles downwards. Wrapping your hand around his girth you spread it over his full length, coating his cock with your spit. 

“Oh wow,” he mutters, nearly going cross eyed. You take his cock in your mouth once more, swallowing more and more of him until his entire length is down your throat. 

“Goddamn baby,” he growls as you bottom out. You begin to bob your head, sucking him off. The sounds being made right now are grotesque - slurping and gagging from you, moaning and grunting from him. But it's only turning you on even more. 

“Ohh that's a good girl,” he grumbles as he pets your hair. You increase your pace - saliva coats your lips, dripping down your chin, spreading across your face. The utterly sloppy head has Soonyoung writhing beneath you, babbling unintelligibly as his orgasm draws near. 

“Feels so good baby.” 

“Fuck you’re so hot.”

“Pretty girl sucking my cock so good right now.” 

His other hand ventures to your head, holding you down as his hips jerk and shake. Your throat aches from him fucking it, your eyes well with tears - but your clit throbbing against the stickiness that has flooded your panties proves how much you fucking love this. 

“Ohhhhhmygoddddd,” he groans through gritted teeth. “Fuuuuck, y/n… I’m gonna cum…”

He pushes your head down as he releases, giving you several hard thrusts as his cum spurts down your throat. You let him fill you up, eagerly swallowing each burst of his load. His hips slow as his climax wanes. His arms plop onto the couch cushions, his body sinking into the sofa as his body relaxes. He drags one hand to your face, grasping your jaw gently as he slowly pulls you off of his sensitive throbbing cock. He wants to look at you so bad, see that pretty little face with those pretty swollen lips covered in both your juices - but his energy is too drained to even lift his head. 

“C’mere,” he pleads softly. 

You pull yourself back up onto the couch, pressing your body closely against his. You lay your head on his shoulder as your fingertips delicately trace up and down his cock - it pulsates at your touch. 

He turns his head to face you, his nose brushing up against yours. He lifts one hand, tenderly cradling your cheek. 

“Can I kiss you?” he asks, his voice low and husky. 

You feel a pang deep in your stomach. You've been scared to admit it this whole time, but at this point it's undeniable: you are falling in love with your roommate. And god do you want to kiss him. 

“Yes,” you whisper, the word hot and breathy against his lips lingering before yours. 

Soonyoung grabs your face with both hands, pulling you deep into his kiss. His lips hungrily lock onto yours, his body stilling except for his chest, rising and falling with slow, heaving breaths. He kisses you, and kisses you, and kisses you, holding you tightly, refusing to allow any physical space between you two. You want to stay here for all of eternity.

Slowly, your mouths part - he gives your bottom lip a few more tugs before letting go. His forehead rests against yours, both of you exhaling deeply in tandem. His hands drop to your waist, touching you gently as the warmth of his breath greets your face. He looks into your eyes as he holds you. 

“Can I sleep with you tonight?”

You nod. Quickly tucking his remaining erection back into his sweats, he takes your hands and pulls you up with him, kissing you with each step as you stumble together into your room. You plop onto your bed, pulling Soonyoung on top of you. He rolls over, holding you snugly against him, your legs tangling together as he starts making out with you again. Your aching cunt presses against his thigh as you wrap your legs around him; you begin to grind your hips slowly.

“Wait,” he pauses. He reaches for your shorts, sliding your pajamas and panties off of you. You kick them the rest of the way off, discarding them somewhere on the bed, your shirt quickly joining them. He yanks his own pants off; you straddle his thigh again, your soaked cunt greeting his skin. 

“Oh my god,” he groans. “It’s so fucking wet.”

Your hips begin again, dragging your pussy up and down his thigh, your juices spreading everywhere. You whimper at the stimulation, riding Soonyoung’s thick muscular quads as he wraps his arms around your torso. You cling to him as he draws you in close, his mouth wandering to your neck to plant a string of small kisses on the delicate skin. Ceaseless moans escape you as a fire builds in your gut, the burning pleasure of your climax rapidly approaching. 

“Fuck I’m gonna cum,” you cry out as you frantically get yourself off on Soonyoung’s thigh. You feel his cock growing hard again - it presses into your belly as it strains against the fabric of his underwear. 

“Cum for me babe,” his low voice speaks softly into your ear. 

Desperately grinding your pussy on his thigh, you finally release. You scream his name as you cum, legs trembling as your body shakes with vigor. Soonyoung holds you tight, kissing your cheek lovingly as you orgasm in his arms. 

“That's my girl,” he murmurs as he kisses your lips. You begin to come down, but your head is still spinning from the overwhelming stimulation. You try to catch your breath, slowing your breathing as Soonyoung rubs your back - but his touch and the warmth of his body sends you into a deep state of relaxation. He whispers something else to you, but before you can even process what he's saying, you are fast asleep. 

You’re awoken the next morning by loud, moaning cries.

Still half asleep, you begin to register a familiar bodily sensation. Only when you pry your eyes open and see Soonyoung situated between your legs, do you realize you’re the one moaning. His face is buried in your pussy, licking you slowly, tasting you, savoring every moment of having his tongue in your cunt. 

He lifts his eyes, noticing that you’re now conscious.

“Soonyoung what the fu- ohhh,” you question, but are cut off by his lips attaching themselves to your clit. 

“Good morning beautiful,” he mumbles into your cunt, refusing to take his mouth of you for a second. 

“Oh my god,” you groan. “I forgot I told you you could do this.”

He pauses, looking up at you. 

“Do you want me to stop-”

“NO,” you shout, louder than you meant. You lift your hips, putting your folds back in his mouth. He smiles into your cunt, eagerly resuming eating you out.

“Good,” he replies, barely audible as his tongue begins working into your hole again. 

Your back arches as his nose presses into your clit, making it throb desperately. He flattens his tongue, licking you all the way up, then swirling around the sensitive bud. 

“Ahhh,” you cry out involuntarily. “You’re gonna make me cum already.”

This only eggs him on further. He wraps his arms around your thighs, grasping you tightly as the tip of his tongue quickly flicks over your clit.

“How- fuck, how long have you been down there?”

He glances up at you again, sticking his tongue out exaggeratedly as he continues licking you. 

“I dunno, like five minutes maybe.”

“Five?!” you proclaim as your head falls back onto the pillow. You run your fingers through his hair. “That’s it?”

Soonyoung smirks, planting several kisses on your pussy. 

“You were already soaking wet when I got here,” he informs you. “Must’ve been dreaming about me.”

“Oh shut the fuck up,” you pretend to be annoyed with him, but the moans escaping from your lips undermine your facade. 

“C’mon, you like it,” he teases.

“Yeah,” you admit. “I do.”

He grins widely. “Good girl.”

His praise and the way his tongue is now circling your clit send you over the edge. You whine as your orgasm approaches - loud, pathetic sounds filling the air as he sucks and slurps between your thighs. 

“Don’t stop,” you beg. 

The sensation builds and builds, making you squirm beneath him as every nerve in your body erupts with overwhelming delight.

“Oh fuck- I’m cumming,” you shriek as you reach your high. You cum on his tongue, long and hard - riding out your orgasm on his face accompanied by loud, unabashed cries of pleasure. As your body starts to relax, you release the tight grip you didn’t realize you had on his hair, stroking his head as he softly laps up your release. 

“Come here,” you tell him softly, but he doesn’t move. He seems to be even more relaxed than you are right now.

“Just a second,” he responds through deep breaths, his body sinking into the bed.

“Oh my god, did you…”

“Cum in my pants again?” he finishes your question for you. “Yeah. I did.”

He lifts his head, his eyes glazed over in post-orgasm bliss. 

“You’re so hot, I couldn’t help it,” he says with an amused grin.

Finally able to move, he rises - his underwear visibly filled with cum. He crawls back up to you, plopping onto his back right beside you. He peels the ruined underwear off, tossing them aside, then stares down at his own mess.

“Lemme just, um…” 

He goes to get up, intending to go clean himself off, but you pull him back onto the bed.

“I got it.”

You scoot yourself down, positioning your face near his groin. Slowly you begin to lick his own cum off of him.

“Jesus fuck, y/n,” he groans, his voice deep and low. “You’re filthy.”

“Don’t act like you don’t think this is hot.”

“Oh I do,” he says proudly. “Very fucking hot.”

He strokes your hair as you clean him up. As you finish he pulls you back up, laying you on top of him as he wraps his arms around you once more. Both of you are sweaty, and the embrace is nearly too warm - but neither of you want to move. 

You lay there in silence, your head tucked comfortably into his shoulder, peacefully listening to the songbirds chirping as warm morning sunlight filters into the room through the blinds. Soonyoung is breathing so steadily that you think he's fallen asleep underneath you, but eventually you hear your name softly muttered from his lips. 

“Hey, y/n?”

“Hmm?” you reply sleepily without moving. Soonyoung caresses your back, dragging his fingertips gently up and down over the soft skin. 

“What are we?”

You lift your head, propping yourself up by your elbow. You look down at Soonyoung - he gazes up at you, waiting for your response.

“I don’t know,” you answer after thinking for a moment. “What do you want us to be?”

He reaches for your face, stroking your cheek gently. 

“I wasn’t lying the other day.” He stares into your eyes. Despite the fact that he literally just had his face buried in your pussy, it feels overwhelmingly intimate. Your stomach churns anxiously.

“I really do love you.”

You knew he was going to say it, but your heart skips a beat anyway. Hearing him say it out loud, hearing him confess his love to you - it’s a thought that previously scared you. But you no longer fear confronting this reality. Now that you’re here, it feels comfortable, it feels right. 

“I’m sorry if that makes things weird between us, but it’s the truth,” he says timidly. “I just can’t deny it any longe-”

You cut him off with a kiss. 

You kiss him for far too long - but it’s never long enough. When your lips part at last, you gaze at him lovingly, a big, cheesy grin growing upon your face.

“I love you too, dummy.”

He stares back at you, mouth agape. He finally processes your words, his face lighting up with excitement.

“Really??” he asks you in awe. 

“Really really,” you nod.

He embraces you with explosive enthusiasm, making you yelp as he rolls over on top of you. You giggle as he gives you a series of rapidly-placed kisses all over your face. 

“Stop itttt,” you cry through your laughter. “That tickles!”

“Sorry,” he says with a big goofy smile. “I’m just really excited.”

“Yeah, I can tell,” you say as you grab his boner that has quickly returned.

He beams at you. “What can I say, you make my dick happy.”

“God, you’re such a dork,” you tell him as you roll your eyes. But you guide his tip to your entrance, shifting your hips to take him inside you.

“Ohh fuuuuck,” he mumbles, his eyes rolling back into his head. He starts slowly sliding his overstimulated cock into you, grunting when his whole length is inside. He rests, unmoving.

“You good?” you ask him.

“Yeah, just trying not to cum immediately,” he says, grinning.

“Soonyoung, you are crazy.”

“Crazy for you,” he says with a kiss. 

You spend the rest of the day in bed together, making out, fucking, napping - anything, so long as you don’t have to leave his side. Soonyoung, being Soonyoung, tells you he loves you no fewer than 12 more times.

“So,” he asks as you intertwine your fingers with his, holding hands after he goes down on you for probably the fourth time today. “Does this mean I can call you my girlfriend now?”

You try to answer, but you’re trying to catch your breath after your millionth orgasm. 

“Hmmmm?” he pesters.

“Gimme a… fucking second…” you mumble, pushing him away playfully. He gets right back in your face.

“I’m not hearing no…” he says, kissing your nose.

“Oh my god, yes, Soonyoung. The answer is yes.”

He grins from ear to ear, then wraps his entire body around yours, clinging to you like a koala.

“Yayyyy!" he replies as he nuzzles his face into you. 

“You know,” he says after a few moments of silence. “I’m pretty hungry…”

“You better mean real food this time,” you tell him sternly. “I don’t think I could handle any more orgasms today.”

“Yes, real food,” he chuckles. “Shall I order delivery from that Thai place you like?”

“Yes please, I’m fucking starving.”

“You got it, baby.”

[w0rmm1lk]

May I request the class 1A boys (if u write for multiple in the same fic) reacting to their gn! S/o (who’s normally insanely calm and patient) finally snapping and ends up nearly killing a villain? Like reader snaps during a fight against a villain or smth because the boys (seperate but yk) got hurt and stuff? Sorry if this doesn’t make much sense, I suck at explaining things 😭

hi! i didnt end up doing all the boys but I did the ones I think I would b able to write for best hehe, for future posts probably gonna limit it to 5 characters per post!

characters: Tenya Iida, Denki Kaminari, Eijiro Kirishima, Mezou Shoji, Shoto Todoroki, Katsuki Bakugo, Izuku Midoriya.

reader: Gn

summary: the very well known 1a student (reader) who is known for being calm and understanding almost fucking kills someone.

warnings: blood mentions, near death experience, swearing, injuries.

other details: 1A!reader, reader quirk not mentioned but they use their bare fists to beat the shit out of the villain, villain is not any specific one.

👓Tenya Iida👓

👓- Iida was fast but damn the villain was faster.

👓- this resulted into iida now basically completely motionless on the ground yet still concious.

👓- usually if it was any of your other friends you would just take a deep breath and anylis whats going on to make sure things are delt with properly.

👓- but that iis not the case this time.

👓- it was almost like something snapped.

👓- nobody could actually figure out how you managed to catch the villain, especially with their speed.

👓- but bystanders were more focused on the fact that you were now repeatedly slamming their face into the sidewalk.

👓- honestly a miracle the villain survives that shit, but they 100% had brain damage afterwards.

👓- normally iida would step in but he could only really stare at you.

👓- partly due to the shoock, but also the fact that he straight up couldn't move from his injuries.

👓- after everything calmed down and iida recovered he gave your ass a huge lecture.

⚡Denki Kaminari⚡

⚡- he was shocked.

⚡- pun intended but also he was just straight up in shock.

⚡- first off, surprising he got these many injuries without short circuting.

⚡- guess his training rlly payed off.

⚡- well at least his quirk training.

⚡- thinks its sick as hell how you just beat the shit out of the villain.

⚡- their face will never be the same again.

⚡- hes kinda into it tbh.

🪨Eijiro Kirishima🪨

🪨- literally just makes the :o face

🪨- this man got one hit that actuqally injured him at you just cut loose.

🪨- he felt like not even he could do that much damage in unbreakable. (he totally could do worse but hes just having a moment leave me alone.)

🪨- aftwards will literally beg you to spar with him.

🪨- unfortunatley never gets to fight you while ur that pissed off.

🪨- honestly when he saw how beat up the villain was he thought that it was bakugos doing for a hot second.

🐙Mezou Shoji🐙

🐙- the way you reacted to him getting hurt lowkey reminded him of dark shadow during the training camp.

🐙- very similar situation tbh.

🐙- it was just one of his extended limbs that got injured, yet you reacted as if he had just been decapitated.

🐙- froze up for a second when he watched you just immediately run up to the villain you have been fighting for at least an hour and just absolutely demolish then within a few minutes.

🐙- had to restrain you a bit to stop you from actually murdering them.

🐙- was a little shocked at the sudden swap oof personality for that short time but was more focused on stopping you from being charged with murder.

❄️Shoto Todoroki🔥

❄️🔥- ^that face.

❄️🔥- like that is just his reaction tbh.

❄️🔥- i mean its not everyday you see the person thats just a slightly more emotionally available version of you almost kill someone.

❄️🔥- especially over a small cut.

❄️🔥- the cut wasnt even caused directly by the villain, it was a broken piece of glass that was flying around with other debri./

❄️🔥- i mean-- at least you caught the villain?

❄️🔥- and almost killed them.

❄️🔥- along with free medical debt.

❄️🔥- or no medical debt?

❄️🔥- idk how that stuff works in japan bruh.

💥Katsuki Bakugo💥

💥- fight me all you want but

💥- he just straight up finds it hot.

💥- like if you look close enough this mf is blushing.

💥- who knew that the one time someone makes bakugo blush is his partner attempting murder.

💥- originally wasnt going to hold you back.

💥- the longer he watched you beat the shit out of this guy he started to genuinley think you were going to kill them.

💥- once everything settles down you started back to you normal calm persona.

💥- bro was just like ????

🥦Izuku Midoryia🥦

🥦- panic.

🥦- like you dont even have to look at him, you just need to be near him and you can basically feel how panicked he is over this.

🥦- lots of panicked words, you can barely even tell whats he's saying through the rage but also the pure speed he's speaking at.

🥦- few words that were mostly intelligable you could tell he was saying you should stop.

🥦- even if you wanted to stop your body wouldnt let you.

🥦- ended up needing to use blackwhip to get you off.

🥦- not that it did much being the villai already had a broken nose and multiple broken ribs.

🥦- probably missing teeth aswell.

🥦- izuku is lowkey terrified to somehow piss you off now.

theyre all a little short but i think I slayed

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

what meaningful plenaration does "sane" add to "safe sane and consensual"? safe and consensual are both pretty intuitive as to what is and isn't and why they're important, but what is the aspect of this nebulous hypothetical insane sex (this would work better as a phrase if insane sex wasn't already a thing people said about good sex. much to think about) which is uniquely best to avoid but not already covered by safe or consensual?

i've been thinking about that one thing i saw a while ago about reevaluating ssc in the face of increased awareness of like, mad liberation and the ways that mentally disabled people are barred from sexual agency by ableism & the psych system and i genuinely can't come up with a reason why sane was in there in the first place

great question! let's talk about it!

but first: hey. what on earth does plenaration mean. I absolutely understand the question that you're asking but I don't know that word (unusual for me, if I may flex a little!) and google is giving me NOTHING.

anyway, moving on!

SSC was initially popularized by in 1983 by the New York group Gay Male S/M [Sadism/Masochism] Activists, and particularly activist David Stein. let's take a look at their full statement:

GMSMA is a not-for-profit organization of gay males in the New York City area who are seriously interested in safe, sane, and consensual S/M. Our purpose is to help create a more supportive S/M community for gay males, whether they desire a total lifestyle or an occasional adventure, whether they are just coming out into S/M or are long experienced. Our regular meetings and other activities attempt to build a sense of community by exploring common feelings and concerns. We aim to raise awareness about issues of safety and responsibility, to recover elements of our tradition, and to disseminate the best available medical and technical information about S/M practices. We seek to establish a recognized political presence in the wider gay community in order to combat the prevailing stereotypes and misconceptions about S/M while working with others for the common goals of gay liberation. (x)

GMSMA was founded three years prior in 1981, which is only important because that was also the year the first AIDS patients were identified. I don't know if you're familiar with a little thing called The AIDS Crisis, but suffice to say that during the 80s the public perception of gay male sexuality Was Not Good, particularly something double deviant like sex that was gay and also kinky. in a later essay reflecting on (and criticizing!) the mainstreaming of the term, Stein said he wanted to SSC framework to distinguish mutually consensual sadomasochism from "the criminally abusive or neurotically self-destructive behaviour popularly associated with the term 'sadomasochism'."

in other words: while I can't tell you everything that lay in the heart of David Stein when he first used the phrase, it's very clear that the GMSMA seemed invested in improving the public image of kink by separating it as much as possible from the notion that it was something only practiced by crazed degenerates - you know, something queer people have been forced to do for pretty much all queer sex throughout history? in the same 2000 essay linked above, Stein reflects on how many people took SSC as "a welcome validation for a type of sexuality still considered "sick" or "crazy" by much of our society."

is there still ableism baked into that narrative re: the notion that mental illness is a bad thing to be affiliated with? yeah, absolutely, and we'll get to that! spoilers: it's been a source of much criticism, which is why many people now prefer RACK over SSC. but give me a second to get there!

in the essay I've been pulling from, Stein freely admits that GMSMA never attempted to offer concrete definitions of SSC, particularly not the latter two: "We left "sane" and "consensual" much vaguer, "sane" because it's pretty vague to begin with once you get past the obvious meaning - able to distinguish fantasy from reality - and "consensual" because we didn't realize how tricky it is."

the idea of "sane" meaning a person is meaningfully able to distinguish fantasy from reality was echoed by Gil Kessler, a longtime kink educator and board member of GMSMA. rope enthusiast Tammad Rimilia defined it differently, saying that sane kink referred to a situation where "all parties are engaging in this activity by direct intention and can judge the effects of their actions." you can see that echoed in Stein's earlier statement about differentiating the kind of sex that GMSMA encouraged from "self-destructive behavior."

tl;dr, the "sane" is mostly there to specifically draw attention to the fact that some people engage in sex in ways that may be a form of self-harm and/or may want to engage in sex when they are experiencing reality in a way that prevents them from making rational, fully-informed choices, such as psychosis or manic episodes. per their own statement, it seems the GMSMA would discourage having sex with people in this category.

obviously that may already fall under the purview of safe and consensual, but show me an organization that's never gotten a little redundant in its mission statement and I'll eat my shirt.

now, back to that criticism! as Stein notes in the essay I've referenced heavily in this answer, understandings of safety, sanity, and consent have come a long way since 1983! the risk-aware consensual kink model (RACK) has gained popularity for many reasons, with much of the conversation centered on both the inherent ableism of SSC and concerns about the promise of "safe" and the unhelpful and unrealistic expectations it may set. hell, even notions of consent are constantly growing and evolving. and that's wonderful! SSC comes from a very specific time and place in the history of kink and may no longer be the pinnacle of best practices for everyone, but there's still plenty to be learned from its origins.

[rollercoasterwords]

Hey bestie. I finished the hand that feeds yesterday. Safe to say you have successfully emotionally devastated me, uh. Due to this I ended up in Google docs at 2am with a fix-it drabble of your fic (yes, a fic of a fic, I have a life)

1. Can I have your blessing to write this. Mostly for my own mental sanity

2. If it turns into something decent and coherent may I post it to my ao3 (full cred to u, for the og OBVI) (will send u another ask with the link, title and my author name)

P.S Your writing has thoroughly and entirely captivated me. That fic is an absolute work of art and I have been rereading Regulus, Marlene and Dorcas’s deaths just to feel something. The other POV reactions to Dorcas dying btw jesus I’m never recovering from Alice

Will be checking out your other work please please keep writing I am going insane

YAY for emotional devastation <3 love hearing that it inspired u 2 write ur own thing of course that’s alright!! i literally have multiple fics on ao3 that r just rewrites of other people’s stories lmao i think riffing off someone else’s writing is such a fun part of fanfiction & like. essentially the entire basis of fanfiction in the first place lol

[saltiestgempearl]

Today is the day! At long last, I can talk about my absolute favorite headcanon about Dr. Seward with you all.

I'm writing a new post about it instead of just reblogging my post from last year because that post is not spoiler free. That is, I posted October 22 of 2022, so it does mention things from entries that have not happened yet in the 2023 Dracula Daily.

That said, most of it is still fine now that the September 3 entry has arrived, so I have put together a slightly edited version that does not touch on anything that happens after the September 3 Dracula entry:

It starts out with this passage from today's entry:

How can he'—and he pointed at me with the same look and gesture as that with which once he pointed me out to his class, on, or rather after, a particular occasion which he never fails to remind me of—'know anything of a young ladies? He has his madmen to play with, and to bring them back to happiness, and to those that love them.

The thing is, that's not exactly the wording in the original book. In the original book, it says “He has his madams to play with, and to bring them back to happiness, and to those that love them.” Many people write this off as a typo to the point of changing it to “madmans” or “madmen” in some versions.

But what if it wasn’t a typo?

The word “madam” implies an older woman, like anywhere from middle-aged to elderly. And at the time, it was not at all uncommon for women in this age group to be sent to asylums to recuperate. Sometimes it was just a way to get female relatives you didn’t like out of the way, but sometimes it wasn’t.

You see, many Victorians (men and women alike) unironically bought into the “delicate woman” narrative. People really, genuinely thought women were just psychologically more predisposed to mental instability.

Anyway, the headcanon is that Seward actually started out as a relatively low-level psychologist at an asylum, primarily working with middle-aged to elderly women. And being the inquisitive man he is, he interacted with the patients in a less-than-conventional way, letting them talk about things that would normally be considered signs of imbalance by the contemporary medical community (e.g., “sometimes I wish I’d never had my children,” “sometimes I just want as little to do with my husband as possible,” “honestly those suffragettes make some good points,” etc.). This isn’t to say he was some feminist icon mind you; he didn’t even necessarily agree or legitimize these ideas. But he didn’t shoot them down either—he just listened. And by engaging with the women in this way, he was essentially exploring some of what we now call talk therapy, which was very much not a thing at this time. He may have also tried to be supportive of their hobbies, which while not unheard of (institutions like Bedlam set a precedent for this), was not the most common thing either.

So he did this for a while, and surprise surprise, it actually helped these women quite a bit. He quickly got a reputation for being someone who was unusually gifted in turning around cases of “nervous disorders” that were so common with these delicate womenfolk.

But then some higher-ups decided “oh, well if he’s good with this, he must be good with insane people too.” So despite being a 29-year-old budding psychologist in a very young field, he suddenly found himself the head of an asylum with a very different sort of population to treat.

Given why he was put in this position, Jack naturally continues using the methods that helped his former patients recover so spectacularly. The issue is, of course, that people who are dealing with psychosis or other more serious conditions generally need a different approach than neglected women with anxiety. Basic talk therapy isn’t going to cut it with someone like Renfield.

But again, this field is very young, so Seward is actually relatively limited on how much he can research this. So he continues with his talk therapy, but then adds things like straightjackets into the mix when his patients have meltdowns because that was also a relatively accepted solution at the time (though not universally so; even in Bram Stoker’s time, there were some professionals in the field who had figured out that this type of manual restraint was not helpful and honestly not humane.)

It’s also possible that Jack might have had some criticism early on for not being firm enough with his more “difficult” patients, so he might have overcompensated for that by using the straightjacket solution more often when things got out of hand.

And finally, Jack also has his mad scientist tendencies that he openly grapples with in his diary—you know, the sort that caused him to make wildly irresponsible decisions like “let’s let Renfield escape, but supervised, and see what happens.” And since Jack was the head of the hospital, no one shot down this obviously ridiclous idea because they probably didn’t have the authority to.

TL;DR: The headcanon is “maybe Van Helsing did mean ‘madams’ because Jack started off wildly successful in treating older women with anxiety, and as a result was catapulted into a much more powerful position he was neither properly trained for nor mentally ready for.”

[mysticalsoot]

someone to (not) watch me die

mistki and dsmp dr? tears.

➸ note; um so i got one too many dsmp crimeboys edits on my fyp that inspired this monstrosity. i don't often cry at whatever I write, especially while writing it but I'm still recovering so.. fair warning. its based off my dsmp dr with @lillylvjy so that's why its very very very canon adjacent. anyways, listen to I bet on losing dogs by mitski while reading (have it on repeat) if you want an extra lil sting. also I uh may have used this photo on a diff fic before but if I did, no I didn't!

➸ pairing; c!lmanbur x gn!reader

➸ summary; wilbur's been distant lately but when you finally convince him to spend some time with you, your life takes a dramatic turn. he doesn't always keep his promises.

➸ warning; hurt absolutely no comfort, MCD !!! incredibly implied suicide/assisted suicide (going into a battle knowing he's not coming back), swearing probably, overuse of baby (sue me), reader kinda wants to off themselves at the end but uh who wouldn't? implied age gap

➸ age-rating; 15+

➸ wordcount; 2k

main masterlist // part 2

it wasn't uncommon for wilbur to be distant with you, he always had his moments where he was less than loving. but he always had his moments, the nights where he'd come home after a day of work, crawling into bed and holding onto you like his life line. he'd kiss all over your face and murmur sweet words and praises, how much he loved and adored and appreciated you.

yet, the next day when you woke up, he'd be back in his office, working by lamplight and only responding with hums and refusing eye contact. it was torture for you. getting him again, held in your arms and so close to your heart only for him to walk away. to turn off his warmth and shove the cold into your face.

there came a day where you wouldn't seek him out anymore, you'd let him come to you if he so desired. but he often didn't, and when he would exist out of his office once in his adult life, he'd simply complain about the war or his enemies or his father or his brothers. if anything, more complaints slipped past his lips than a simple 'i love you'.

of course, you wondered if it was your fault, if you did something that turned him off from you, made him shut you out. yet you also wondered if he found you to be a bother, or something that only held him back. granted it was known he was a bit older than you, it didn't really matter but maybe it finally got to him. where he internalized it and thought it would lessen his chances of being elected or keeping office for the country of L'manburg. you thought it was stupid, but it wasn't so out of the picture.

the day started out like most others, you'd tend to yourself, eating and showering and doing something to keep your mind at peace. often baking or crafting, or going out to the flower fields to check on what has newly grown. you began to get restless, hearing wilbur from upstairs. he's pacing and mumbling to himself. most likely frustrated with something new, something he must be writing. something with lmanburg. something that has nothing to do with you.

but you want to mend things, you want to heal things or at least build a temporary bridge between the two of you. you're desperate for closeness again, and while you'd never admit it to him; you could never love another like he. you simply couldn't find the same type or amount of love in your heart for another person. another insane man like him.

so, you set out to pick a bouquet of his favorite flowers, pruning them and putting them in a vase you both made together early on in your relationship. you filled it with water and sugar, placing the cut flowers in the vase and tying a ribbon around the glass and making a bow before starting your trip up the stairs and into his office. you sigh softly before knocking on the door.

you hear shuffling for a moment, drawers opening and the sound of paper rustling before wilbur sighs deeply, "come in, love."

you open the door, stepping in and closing it behind you, his face held in his hands on his desk. he lifts his gaze to catch on you as you set the flowers on his desk. his gaze softens on you, almost sad and mournful and you can't quite place why.

a sour, sad smile curves on his lips, "what are those, dear?" he pats his thigh, beckoning you to him. he hasn't done that in months--but you'd be a fool to decline, so you quickly run over, sliding into his lap and resting against his chest.

"flowers for you," you sigh, nestling your nose against his neck, his hands coming up behind your head to rub at your hair.

"why, baby?" his voice cracks softly and he leans his face down to your cheek, kissing the soft skin before nuzzling his nose against the shell of your ear.

"a reminder that you can't throw me away," it comes out as more of a whine than you would have liked it to, but as always, you become vulnerable around him. there isn't much you can hide.

he's silent, his body tensing up at your words as he combs his fingers through your hair. his breath shakes, but he hides any emotion he must be feeling too well for you to pick it out.

"I haven't thrown you away. you're my baby, yes?" he croons softly, his lips ghosting over your temple and cheek, placing kisses as a silent truce.

"then why do I never see you?" you huff, pulling your body closer to his as a way to soak in the attention. or to receive comfort. you are his baby, but you aren't strong enough to admit it.

"I'm busy, that's all, love. I'm here now, aren't I?" he sucks in a breath after he speaks, hands now both in your hair and on your back, trying to give you that comfort you seek.

"you should come to bed earlier tonight. just.. I want you to be around me, for once."

you can tell he takes a moment to think, gears turning in his skull as his fingers trace on your back, ghosting over the skin.

"I can try," he breathes softly, his face in your hair, and his hand held on the back of your head.

"do you promise, wilbur?" you whisper, pressing your hands into his back.

"I promise," he kisses your forehead, holding your face in his hands as he keeps you in front of him, "I have some more work to do, I'll see you later, okay?"

he brushes stray strands of hair out of your face before placing a few kisses around your face, landing a final sweet kiss to your lips.

"okay, okay," you whisper, like a promise to yourself as you step out of his lap, walking to the door and standing there for a moment before turning to face him.

"enjoy the flowers. i love you, okay?" you smile softly, and he meets your eyes, an apology held in his irises that you can't quite register fully.

"I love you too. i will, I always do," he smiles sweetly, waving at you as you leave his office and head downstairs. you're partly thankful he has work for a bit more, you had plans of going to nikis bakery to pick up a few pastries for the two of you to share and your hope is that he'll be done by the time you're back. so you slip on your shoes and take the walk towards town square. it's nice today, the leaves are falling all ready to crunch under the feet of L'manburg's citizens. the wind brushes your cheeks, chilling the skin and bringing that familiar fall redness.

you always enjoyed fall walks, and it always brought you joy but the prospect of spending time with wilbur this evening put an extra pep in your step. you wave at any familiar face, smiling softly and greeting all of the sellers at their booths. you don't notice your sister not being at her flower shop, or Tommy not tending his fireworks stand in front of it. you don't notice many of the things that are painfully off about the day, your happiness clouding your judgement.

you quickly slip into nikis bakery, looking down at the case of the daily pastry specials, before choosing two of her cinnamon cookies and two of her pain au chocolat. they're both yours and wil's favorite, and while you'd adore sharing, wilbur is often possessive with his sweets. so it's best to get two of each.

you smile to yourself as Niki packages each pastry and she giggles at your happy demeanor.

"feeling extra peppy today, huh?" she smiles, ringing up the pastries and asking for payment. you pay quickly while nodding, smiling so wide and happy.

"yeah, I finally got Wilbur to agree to come to bed early. so I have plans for a bit of a date night. i just hope he sticks to his promises," you grin, taking the pastries gratefully into your hands.

"he sticks to his promises, when it comes to you. I have a good feeling," she nods as she speaks, a few moments later you both bid your farewells to one another; fully knowing you'll be back for a bread order on Sunday.

you took the long walk home, wanting to take in more of the nature around you, and to give wil some extra time to work. you knew he'd go over what he promised, but you hoped he'd pay his promise due.

plus, the scenic route was always more enjoyable. so the longer way will do, the flower fields grazing your ankles. the sun setting gently, casting a golden hue across the land, the soft shadows of buildings and trees painted on the grass. it was beautiful, almost like you were walking through a painting.

you finally made it home, opening the door and shutting it behind you. not noticing wil's work boots being gone from their spot on the rack. you giggled as you held the pastries in your hand, calling out for Wilbur.

"Wil? my love! i have sweets from Niki!" you hurried up the stairs, peeking into the bedroom before looking over the banister at the downstairs; nothing. you hum, walking over to his office, opening the door to still find anything but him.

you frown, "wilbur?" you call again, turning to walk out before your eyes catch on his desk, the now empty vase held on the desk without a flower in sight.

you looked closer, there on his desk laid a note and a rose from the bouquet you put there the same morning. you opened the note after a moments hesitation and you skimmed the words, eyes widening and tears falling as the message set in your mind.

'my darling,

you'll always be my baby.

yet, there's more for me, just not here.

- yours, wilbur.'

you dropped the pastries, and then the letter, slumping into his desk before shuffling through every single drawer and pile of papers. tears cascading down your cheeks.

"no, no, no, no-" you try desperately to convince yourself or a cruel joke, searching for more answers somewhere in his desk. it must be here, mustn't it? he was always one for dramatics so surely there's another secret note.

you spend the next hour tearing through his desk, tearing apart his office before you admit defeat. laying your head on his desk and letting yourself crack, you let it all out. tears and sobs and cries and screams bounce against the bookshelves that line the walls of his office.

there's a knock at the door, and after a moment of contemplation, you dazedly take the stairs down to the foyer, opening the door and being greeted by Phil. by Wil's father.

"Phil?" you start, ready to ask if he's here to tell you where wil is, that it's some sick joke he'll apologize for and never pull again-

"you know, don't you?" he pauses, avoiding your gaze, "we found his body, he left this for you."

he hands you an envelope and you take it, nodding to him as he speaks soft words of condolences and a goodbye. you shut the door, letting yourself fall against it as you stare at the folded envelope, wondering if it's worth the trouble to open.

what more could he possibly say?

but also, what more could it hurt?

you open it gingerly, sighing softly as you sniffle, wiping your eyes gently.

as you unfold the letter, out comes a wedding band, tied by string to another ring.

the ring you told him you wanted as your wedding band.

it clatters to the floor and you break again, letting out loud, pained sobs as you cry and shake on the floor, eyes unable to peel themselves from the rings that now lay on the hardwood below.

the note falls beside the metal rings, a simple phrase scratched into the parchment; 'in another life, my baby'

you want to burn it, to scream and curse the universe.

but then you wonder how much trouble it'd be to join him.

taglist; @lcvejoy @lillylvjy @ella-fella-bo-bella @lotusanonymouse @willgoldszn @whos-nicooo @zebonos

[waitmyturtles]

A little bit more on I Feel You Linger In The Air (reincarnation, the novel version, and more)...

I am back home and recovering from a somewhat INSANELY stressful work trip (WHEW! TIRED!), and I've missed writing meta oh so very much, BUT! A couple of things will be happening in my meta life soon: The Old GMMTV Challenge Bad Buddy Meta Month starts next week (FINALLY, EEE!), Last Twilight starts tomorrow, the Den-Panuwat-penned-and-Only-Friends-adjacent series Playboyy starts next week -- we got a lot going on.

AND, AND! AND! I did myself something good while I was away. I HOUSED the novel version of I Feel You Linger in the Air, because, BECAUSE! I still can't help screaming mentally about that finale -- even though reading the novel actually made me realize that episode 12 of IFYLITA was a touch redundant.

Related to the IFYLITA novel and series: I got an ask in my inbox that somehow disappeared (@porjomkwan, if you're still out there -- thank you for the ask!) that asked about my thoughts on the theme of reincarnation in IFYLITA, and cited this fabulous post and reblog by @tipsyjaehyun and @clairedaring about this theme. Tipsy and Claire covered the majority of the ground that the drama series captures regarding reincarnation -- in particular, the GORGEOUS focus on the northern Thai blessing ceremony that calls back to a human host the 32 spirits that a host carries with them throughout their life/lives. Those spirits can be incarnated and/or reincarnated within repeated and/or beloved figures of the host's memories and reincarnated lives. (That explains why people like Ohm and Kaimook, in Jom's present life, are reincarnated as Khamsean and Fong Kaew in Jom's life of 1928 Chiang Mai. And it explains how Jom can continue to be called to different eras involving Yai, from Commander/Warrior/Mustache Yai of ancient Thailand, to 1928 Chiang Mai Khun Yai, to present-day Chiang Mai Yai Kanthorn.)

@clairedaring notes in their reblog that in the novel, the foundational theme of reincarnation AND of Jom and Yai being forever bound to each other is confirmed, directly and heavily, by Commander Yai. Claire quotes from the novel Commander/Warrior Yai speaking to Jom :

"Jom-Jao, listen, though you are fated to be apart from me, my love will never fade, and it will follow you like a holy spirit, protecting you in my place. No matter where fate brings you, no matter the danger you encounter, may those misfortunes fall upon my spirit instead of yours."

I want to confirm that this is my understanding and experience of the centering and grounding of reincarnation in the series as well (@porjomkwan, this answers your question to me!). And, this very much speaks to what I understand was a gentle criticism by Thai audiences towards the show as this season of the show ended -- because the Commander Yai period really sets in stone what Jom can expect for the rest of his live(s) regarding having Yai in his life again in another time period. In which case, I agree HEAVILY with @clairedaring that IFYLITA absolutely needs a season 2, because that Commander Yai period is so definitive of how this first season gets contextualized in the end of the entire piece.

A couple of other quick notes on the novel before I move to a comparative final point:

1) JOM. JOM IS A SASSY B IN THE NOVEL. DAMN! I honestly think Nonkul Chanon could DEF handle being a touch more sassy. "I'm a grown-ass man," Jom says at one point. Yes, you ARE, HONEY! Sassy B Jom courting and standing up to Commander Yai? It was a WONDERFUL story line. (BTW, the quality of the writing of the IFYLITA Y novel was, as expected, wanting, especially by way of a fan translation. But I have to agree with fans of the novel from Thailand and elsewhere, that the story itself was SOLID.)

2) The history behind the Commander Yai period is FABULOUS to learn about. (@tipsyjaehyun has some context about the various eras of Yai here, if you don't mind a few novel spoilers.) In particular, I spent a LOT of minutes reading about the lengthy reign of the Ayutthaya Kingdom in Thailand, and just -- as an Asian and an Asian-American watching Thai shows, getting deep into this reminds me of my own accountability and responsibility for trying to grasp what an average Thai viewer will bring by way of education-based historical awareness into shows like IFYLITA. This long Wikipedia article is a must read if you want to go deeper into IFYLITA context!

3) My third point on the novel leads into what I quickly want to note by way of at least one comparison to another show that did reincarnation themes differently, but also beautifully, by way of an original Y novel.

Until We Meet Again is a permanent FAVE of mine -- and it captures reincarnation, at least a different style of it, within its drama context. In UWMA's context, a red thread tied between the passed bodies of the lovers Korn and Intouch ensures that their spirits will find each other again in the future.

As noted within UWMA, different Asian cultures have different reads on the meaning of the red thread, from China, to Thailand, to elsewhere. This article notes northwestern and Vietnamese beliefs regarding the red thread, and this Wikipedia article notes the Chinese origins of the myths of the red thread. (Remember than in IFYLITA, the blessing ceremony of calling 32 spirits back to a host is cited as being from northern Thailand -- meaning, many of these myths, legends, and practices are utterly regional, and very tied to specific regional cultures that we can learn more about as viewers. Super cool.)

In UMWA, Korn's and Intouch's spirits inhabit other bodies -- namely, Dean's and Pharm's personages. And Dean and Pharm take on some characteristics of the spirits they provide a home to, and, even more interestingly -- Dean's and Pharm's OWN behaviors reflect the regrets and/or resistances that Korn and Intouch bear to each other, with Korn's spirit being far more forward with love than he was when he was alive; and Intouch's spirit being far more fearful of that love, knowing in the end where his love led to -- their deaths.

In IFYLITA, we see Yai's spirit being reborn essentially into different version of Yai, and all of them called Yai. In the novel, Jom treats all of these Yais as Yais that he can fall in love with -- he is in love with all of them, because the spirit of Yai is essentially a singular spirit being reborn into various different versions of the body of Yai (quick spoiler: the modern-day Yai is only half-Thai).

I happen to REALLY love these various interpretations of reincarnation between these shows, and certainly many, many more shows and movies across Asia that touch upon reincarnation as an essential theme of HOPE, of love, of joy. The various ways in which these practices are regarded, from Buddhism, to Hinduism, to Shintoism, and other Asian spiritual practices, are fascinating to learn about, including their regional variances. And they speak very much to me as an Asian, as to how I learn about cultural practices, nuances, and mores. (A comparative cultural example is how food -- like, say, a dish like Hainanese chicken rice -- differs among Thailand, Malaysia, and Singapore.)

But also, as an Asian watching shows like UWMA and IFYLITA -- I *know* that when I'm watching a show that's based on spirit reincarnation, that I'm not necessarily watching a "sad" show. I remember, of the day dramas of Japan and Korea that I watched when I was younger, that I absorbed better understandings of ancestor worship and elder respect. If a house had an altar with a picture of a passed-on elderly relative -- surely it was understood that that relative had passed away and one could be sad about it. But their spirit is meant to be honored at the altar, and especially in Japanese and Korean family dramas with these kinds of scenes, you can see characters speaking to the pictures of those who have passed on, having conversations, and being the subject of annual ceremonies of honoring the dead.

In other words, what I utterly LOVED about the IFYLITA novel -- and what I truly hope a season 2 will capture -- is that the Yais of the various eras were not despondent when Jom left them. Those Yais knew that a future Yai would experience Jom again. Korn and Intouch knew their spirits would meet again one day: it was Dean and Pharm that needed to come together to make that happen.

I wrote quite a bit about the Asian cinematic tradition of sad and/or open-ended endings in my review of The Love of Siam, and I think one reason why I absolutely cannot shake IFYLITA from my system -- and even UWMA, too, although UWMA has a confirmed happy ending -- is that IFYLITA is utterly reflective of this practice of the open-ended ending, at least for the show's first season, because we KNOW, through reincarnation, that Jom WILL encounter Yai again. If you read the novel, you know that Commander Yai promises this. But even if you don't read the novel, and we never get a season 2 -- to see Yai Kanthorn strolling right into Jom's arms, without very much other context, is enough, at least for an Asian audience, to know that the spirits did their thing again. Dramatically, I do think the finale could use more finessing (cc @lurkingshan and @neuroticbookworm, to whom I said this when I finished the novel), but now that I have the novel's context, I know HOW the finale could have been improved.

I took this ask as a major excuse to just unwind more and more on a piece that I totally loved in IFYLITA, and I hope to heck that we get a second season. I am thrilled that I made IFYLITA my debut into Y series reading, because the story is just so solid, and as I often say about my really beloved shows -- IFYLITA does not shy away from being rooted in assumed knowledge about cultural practices that an Asian audience can automatically check into. It really felt familiar and homey to watch this incredibly made and well-told story about an enduring romance, and I'm so appreciative that IFYLITA will be a show I'll be holding close as this year closes out -- a year that started off on the strongest Asian note with the fabulous Moonlight Chicken. MLC and IFYLITA encapsulating 2023 for Asian audiences? We were fed really, really well.

[m1nd-r0t]

Aspects I have the most experience with; either I have them myself, or I know MANY people with them, or both :

•Sun conjunct Whiterabbit : These are consistently some of the most well-liked, popular, influential, persuasive, and powerful people I have ever met. They all have some sort of hypnotic magnetism, be it intense or subtle. Everyone seems to be drawn to them. There’s such an alluring, deep energy to them and their life. These people go through a LOT. They experience things incredibly deeply. Their life itself is essential one never ending dive down the “rabbit hole”. They are also fascinated and intrigued by a LOT. I notice that some natives are also not mentally there. They are either mentally ill, insane, or psychotic. Violence and other sinister matters are common in some natives as well. Some of them are plagued with drug addiction of all sorts, it may have ruined their life or they bounced back, but drugs are a very common theme. Be it actual drug abuse, use, or feeling captivated by drugs. Drugs are very common here with the Rabbit being prominent.

I myself do have Sun & Saturn conjunct Whiterabbit.

•Mercury and Moon conjunct Messerschmidt : These people… check on them. I CONSISTENTLY see these people going through HELL internally. They have a LOT of shit happen in their lives, they’re also incredibly sensitive to pain. Their home life is usually terrible. And they have a lot of trauma. Mental illness is a genuine possibility and a theme here. Prescribed use of anti-depressants or anti-psychotics is common. Eating disorders and mood disorders is another theme. Self harm and suicidal tendencies is a real possibility. Mentally obliterated.

I have both of these but I’ve learned to work through it over the years.

•Mars conjunct Dante : Terrible experiences with men in their lives. Terrible men. They’ve seen and lived through a lot of the worst parts of men, sex, anger, etc. on the other hand, they can commit some exceptionally terrible acts themselves. Though this isn’t necessarily a guarantee with ALL natives. Their actions or the actions of others can bring about their metaphorical “descent into hell”. Sinful actions.

•Sun conjunct Daitarabotchi : Another one that’s a lot like Whiterabbit. Huge personalities. Tend to be very well liked and very influential. Another one that they seem to be off mentally. Either very sinister thoughts and desires, or straight up mental illness. A lot of these darker asteroids can really have an impact on certain people’s mind and mess them up.

Another aspect that I have (many of these I have but I see them so frequently in people I meet that it’s caught me off guard)

•Mercury conjunct Junko : This is another aspect that I see very commonly in people in my life and they all are really mentally disturbed. Massive amounts of trauma. I see Junko common in people that have been r*ped or sexually assaulted. Mental illness is possible. Verbal abuse, given or received. Sensitive to words. Mentally wounded and damaged.

•Pluto conjunct Isis : VERY healing. Healing presence and very good with healing their own trauma (and others’ trauma) and bouncing back. Absolute regeneration. Coming back from anything no matter how destroyed they were, it may take a long time, but they have the capability to recover. Beautiful and positive transformations. Deeply and intensely reconstructing themselves or their life from the ground up. Teaching others how to deeply heal. Healing others.

I have this conjunction as well

[jamisonwritestf2trash]

Tf2 going go the amusement park

TF2 Mercs at an amusement park!

————————————————————

Anon, you have my heart, I've been wanting an excuse to do this, but it was too long for my headcanon lists.

————————————————————

So when they first get there, it's chaos. Everyone wants to do different things, but it's also not a good idea to let these men run free.

Scout, Soldier, and (suprisingly) Medic are all ready down to hop on some rides.

Pyro, Engie, Heavy, and Sniper want to try their hands at some games.

Demo is just enjoying the fact that everyone is having fun. He's also popping a couple of motion sickness pills prepping himself incase he wants to hop on a couple rides.

Spy whines the entire time. This man is complaining, it's hot, it's expensive, it's loud. I think this man is incapable of having fun (kidding). Stick him on a bench in the shade where he can see how sick Scout and Soilder get after trying to show how cool they are by going on the biggest rides, and he'll eventually be happy.

————————————————————

We're gonna make each merc go on some rides, for the laughs :)

Basically, what rides can they handle and what rides destroy them 😭

Scout makes a show of going on the biggest ride. He's not scared of heights! Put this man on the Top Gun (look it up, it's insane I swear. I went on it once and never recovered. It's kind of like a salt and pepper shaker but with less protection, like no cage, just a over head like plastic vest thing. Plus, it's like 120 feet in the air). And point and laugh as he tries not to throw up afterward. Or comfort him. He'll need it. But put him on a ferris wheel or the swings, and he'll genuinely enjoy himself.

Soldier is also going to talk a big game, but for the most part, this man can back it up. Put him on any Rollercoaster you'd like, and he'll handle it well. I want to throw him on a tall ride? He's fine. Do you want a really good reaction? Send him off to the Grava-tron.

Medic is the only one who can legitimately ride any ride without getting sick or being absolutely terrified. It's a little scary how good this man can handle rollercoasters. Just straight faced after words "Oh is it over?" Type of guy. What he won't tell you is he is actually terrified of heights, like man is crying on the inside. He'd rather die and admit that.

Pyro is off having fun on the kiddie rides. They may be a grown adult, but let's he honest. If you were getting paid less than minimum wage and some person came up to wearing a gas mask and started giving you the most horrific staredown of your life, would you really tell them no? Let them have fun! Put them on any major rides, and it doesn't really kill them, but they aren't having a good time anymore.

Engie is content going on the kid rides with Pyro. Sure, is it a bit weird that two grown adults are waiting in line with literal five year olds? Yes. Do they care? No. I actually don't think any rides would kill him or actually scare him. This man is the only merc who can handle any ride.

Heavy. This man does not like rides. Like at all. He was perfectly content on staying at the games, but Scout literally begged for everyone to go on some rides. I think he'd be fine on the tilt-a-whirl or the elephant ride. He wouldn't like any big rides at all.

Sniper is a lot like Medic. He's pretending it's fine, but he's literally turning green. He can handle heights just fine. It's the spinning over and over again that gets him. He's fine going on some coasters, especially gravity driven ones, but hates the idea of going on the swings with Scout. (He did it anyway)

Demo literally can't ride any of the rides without throwing up. He's already half drunk, and that motion sickness pill he popped can only do so much. Take him on the ferris wheel, and he'll manage. Suggest he go in a mirror maze, and he'll never forgive you (kidding).

Spy. Oh my god, this man. Just like Scout (are we surprised?). "Oh, this is so childish and stupid. No, I'm not scared! I just have better things to do with my time." Literally turned white after most rides. He'd be fine on a big coaster, though like, he's totally fine with going upside down and shit, he's just a baby when it's combined with heights.

——————————���—————————

Okay, time for games!

Scout honestly thinks the games are boring. He's a thrill seeker after all (even if he can't handle the thills we speak of). But introduce this man to the wack-a-mole, and He's enamored. Batter Up Baseball is also a favorite. He won an inflatable baseball bat!

Soldier likes playing any games with a fake gun, even if he's not the best at it. He'd also play football throw (basically, you throw a football through a swinging tire). He wins a plush football.

Medic is staying at that fill a balloon by spraying water in its mouth thing. He loves how endearingly horrific it is! He wins a small stuffed bird. (Archimedes got jealous the second he brought it on to the base).

Pyro loves the Duck Pond! (Pick a rubber duck from a pond and win a prize). They also really like frog catapult. I think I'd be mean to suggest they didn't win a unicorn rubber duck.

Heavy is strangely good at bean bag toss games or games that require a general skill at aiming. He can knock down those blocks that you'd swear were glued to their post. He wins a stuffed axolotol.

Engie is playing the same games as Pyro, but also gets a chance to sneak off and play some basketball games, which he's shockingly good at. He also looks at every game to find a game with a stuffed unicorn for Pyro. (I literally picture that one scene in Dispicable Me if Pyro tries to win the prize and loses).

Sniper. Do I even need to tell yow how well this sweaps the darts and cross bow game? Probably not. Will I? Yes. He genuinely doesn't even need to look half the time. He knows exactly how to hold the rigged crossbow for a perfect hit. The attendant is horrified. He goes to the dart game and teaches a kid how to hit the balloons. He gives the kids around the park his winnings.

Demo. For someone with almost no depth perception, this man is scarily good at the ring toss game. Like, this game is rigged to hell and back, yet he's sweeping every prize from them. He lets the stall keep everything, thankfully hes in it more for the fun. He does take some smaller prizes to give to kids and wins a giant plush cat for himself.

Spy doesn't see the need to spend more money at this place, so he's mainly wandering around to kill time. Until he sees Scout trying to win the horse race game. He sucks at it. Like, really bad, it's almost embarrassing. He's trying to win a big prize. It's a stuffed dog, and it's really cute, but he's having no luck, so he gives up and leaves. Spy walks up and absolutely kills, like he beats the game, no problem. He finds Scout a few minutes later and just hands it to him without a word. (This totally wasn't written because I want some wholesome SpyDad content).

————————————————————

So, finally, the days are almost over, but before they leave, they pick up some food!

Scout is getting pizza and the most horrendous deep-fried food you can think of. He has definitely eaten a deep-fried twinkle before.

Soldier is getting corn dogs and funnel cake. He's okay with the classics sometimes!

Medic is appalled by most things here. He's panicking, thinking his team is going to go into a diabetic coma. But he does end up eating. He figures street corn, and a pretzel is the best option here. But don't worry, this man is letting himself get some unhealthy food. He gets a churro and a candy apple.

Pyro is off finding anything and everything sweet. They grabbed cotton candy, caramel apples, and a cherry snow cone before anyone could stop them. Someone does convince them to eat some nachos or fries so they don't get as sick from all that sugar.

Heavy is off getting cheese curds and an elephant ear. He also gets a snow cone. His is lime, though. He also finds a stand selling subs and is thrilled.

Engie is getting chicken strips and both kettle corn and caramel corn. He is careful to hide the popcorn from Pyro, who looks ready to devour anything that has sugar at this point.

Sniper is not so much horrified as he is disgusted by the food selection. Like don't get me wrong, this man is gross himself but holy fuck. He gets why Americans have a reputation of being obese. He ends up getting a hotdog, and he also decides to see what the hype is about and tries a deep-fried pickle. He now knows why Americans love fried food so much.

Demo doesn't actually think the food is gross. We gotta remember this man probably at Haggis growing up. (Also, I didn't know this, but some amusement parks have turkey legs. So he's totally fine getting a turkey leg, some fries.

Spy. Let's just assume that all the non Americans are horrified and / or disgusted (except Heavy and Demo). But by far, this man is the most horrified. He definitely almost had a stroke watching Scout try and eat all the deep-fried fair food he could find. He ends up settling for a kebab and popcorn. But he may or may not have snuck a deep fried oreo, just to see why Scout liked them so much.

————————————————————

They all go on the ferris wheel together once before they leave!

————————————————————

This ended up being way longer than I expected holy shit 😭

I had so much fun writing this! Thank you again, Anon, for letting me write this, I absolutely love amusement parks and fairs, so this was super cool!

Also! Thank you, guys, for all the love on my other posts. I'm so glad I get to make things people love <3

[episodeoftv]

Prelims, Buffy the Vampire Slayer

The top 3 episodes will move on to the main bracket

propaganda and summaries are under the cut (May include spoilers)

2.21 & 2.22 Becoming, Parts 1 & 2

Angel plots to revive an ancient demon bent on sweeping everything on earth into hell itself. / Spike strikes an unlikely alliance with Buffy to keep Angel from destroying the world.

4.10 Hush

When everyone in Sunnydale loses their voice, the Scooby Gang must silently solve the mystery of the monsters who stole their ability to speak.

4.16 Who Are You?

Having switched bodies with Buffy, Faith enjoys freedom. Meanwhile, Buffy finds herself at the mercy of the Watcher's Council.

5.16 The Body

Buffy, Dawn, and their friends deal with the aftermath of Joyce's death.

The purposeful removal of music for the whole episode, the grief portrayed, the portrayals of people with varying amounts of interaction with death. It hits so hard.

This episode killed me. I have never watched anything that has fully emcompassed the feeling of loss and what it's like to experience death close to you than The Body. It is an absolute gut punch in the best way. I actually had to take a week off of watching Buffy to recover because I was so destroyed. 12/10 I don't think I will ever be able to watch this episode of TV ever again

One of the greatest depictions of grief and bereavement of all time. Both formally inventive and unique in its cinematography, sound design, editing etc. while also being an incredible personally affecting emotional experience.

There’s another buffy episode that probably deserves the title more, but I did have to give this one some recognition. For a whacky silly show about vampires, this episode is maybe the realest portrayal of death and grief I’ve ever seen. It’s not just a sad episode that makes audiences cry - I mean it is that - but it’s also this incredible examination of what it’s like to lose someone, and how the world shifts on its axis when that happens. The lack of any non diegetic music is an amazing touch to give this episode a sense of distance from all others. It’s real in a way that’s hard to watch but also unforgettable. Certain scenes and lines will always stay with me and will forever shape my feelings on life and loss.

6.07 Once More, With Feeling

In this musical extravaganza, Sunnydale residents find themselves bursting into song, and flame, when a demon attempts to make Dawn his bride.

The greatest musical episode of all time! Pretty much all of the songs are unironically bangers, it's better choreographed and shot than frankly a lot of the bad movie musicals that have been inflicted on us in the past few years, and despite the goofy concept it still manages to tell an incredibly affecting story about the protagonist's struggle with depression. Pulls off an absolutely monumental tonal shift from comedic musical theatre homage to devastating emotional gut punch that manages to never feel tonally dissonant

Best musical episode ever (character development, lots of bops, and spontaneous combustion)

It is the best musical episode of any TV series. It is whimsical, but also far from filler and major plot beats happen while the characters sing jaunty little toons about them. Willow and Tara have sex. Spike gets and angsty alt rock song about his unrequited buffy crush. Buffy admits that when her friends resurrected her she was violently ripped out of heaven and doesn't wanna be on earth anymore. Spike and Buffy kiss. Its the best. / Invented musical episodes and is also one of the only good ones ever to have been made. Changed the game. Insane that it’s as good as it is.

[pluckysidekick]

It’s Wednesday, my fellow Drewds! Going into the holidays I can’t help thinking about how our favorite Crew are celebrating the holidays. Can’t wait for all of the @secretsleuthexchange fics, gifsets, and fanvids we’re going to get!

In the meantime, I was inspired by a poll from @burningblake about which classic “standard” song best represents Nace (all excellent choices). I wound up making a Season 4 playlist of standards from the Great American Songbook, and a few other classic tracks, that represent their Season 4 journey for me. If you’re interested in this sort of thing, here we go!

I’ll be linking the Spotify tracks, but you should be able to find them all on Apple Music or YouTube. If you want a link to the full playlist, just hit me up here or on Discord.

1. The Nearness of You - This Hoagy Carmichael classic brings to mind Nancy and Ace’s inability to stay apart every time they’re near each other in Episode 401 🥺. I love the Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Armstrong duet, but I picked Norah Jones’ version from her 2002 debut album because it’s just so perfectly wistful.

2. Is You Is or Is You Ain’t My Baby - this so so cool track was written by Louis Jordan, but I first heard it on Tom and Jerry (that’s the fighting cat and mouse cartoon in case you’re too young to remember them). I immediately envision the back and forth argument Nancy and Ace have throughout Episode 402 in the lyrics of this song. Ace just wants to know! I adore Joe Jackson’s version, but I went with Dinah Washington and Quincy Jones from 1956 because it is absolutely perfect.

3. Night and Day - I like to imagine that Nancy and Ace stayed up all night talking at the end of 402. This song perfectly embodies their relationship at this stage 🥹. It was written by Cole Porter for Fred Astaire to sing in the original ‘The Gay Divorce’ Broadway musical (catch the film, a classic Fred and Ginger madcap musical romcom with such amazing dancing🕺🏼). But I had to go with Frank Sinatra from 1957’s ‘A Swingin Affair’ because it’s such a classic swing tune.

4. April in Paris - I’m not crying, you’re crying. Warning, there’s going to be a lot of crying in this playlist. Nancy telling Ace the story of her parents’ honeymoon in Paris in Episode 403, that shy smile when she tells him she always wanted to recreate it with someone, GAH. I had to pick the wonderful Sarah Vaughan with Clifford Brown on trumpet, simply exquisite. I’m going to have to take a break to sob quietly in the corner. “What have you done to my heart” indeed.

5. Fever - There was only one song, and only one version of this song, that matches the heat Nancy and Ace generated in the infamous Sigil scene. Peggy Lee burned the house down in 1958 with this track. “What a lovely way to burn” - Nancy can relate.

6. So in Love - Another genius Cole Porter song, written originally for Kiss Me Kate, but sung here by the incomparable Ella Fitzgerald (my personal hero). I had to pick it for THE KISS. They are just so in love 😭. A beautiful song and a beautiful rendition worthy of Nancy and Ace’s love. The fact that Kiss Me Kate is a musical about bickering exes who eventually find love again makes it even more perfect.

7. Crying - Roy Orbison, 1962. Need I say more? I may never recover from the final scene of 403. This song at least helps a little with the pain by naming it. Roy hits some insane notes in this song—the intensity matches both Nancy and Ace’s misery in that moment.

8. Good Morning, Heartache - More like Good Morning, Sorbet. In Episode 404, Nancy drowns her sorrows in her favorite frozen dessert to deal with the heartache of gaining and losing Ace. And no one does heartache like Billie Holiday, who recorded this song in 1946. Heartache haunts Nancy all throughout S4, and this track represents it perfectly.

9. I had two contenders for the Nace scenes in Episode 405, both from the early 60’s. I Fall to Pieces, released by Patsy Cline and The Jordanaires in 1961, was a country crossover and Patsy’s number one hit—an incredible track that embodies Nancy’s emotions on seeing Ace again. She can’t even look him the eye at the beginning of the episode. Which brings me to my other choice, Walk on By, written by Hal David and Burt Bacharach, and famously sung by Dionne Warwick in 1964. Nancy puts up a brave front for most of this episode, but inside she wants to break down and cry.

10. Episode 405’s speed dating montage is one of my favorite scenes of Season 4. Again I have two contenders—why should I have to choose? Harold Arlen and Johnny Mercer’s One For My Baby (and One More for the Road), as sung by Ella Fitzgerald (again ‘cause she’s the best), is an ideal soundtrack for Nancy’s increasingly desperate descent as she spends every would-be speed date talking about Ace and THAT KISS. Equally appropriate is Billy Strayhorn’s Lush Life—velvet-voiced Johnny Hartman and saxophonist John Coltrane’s 1963 track positively drips with ennui, elegantly over cocktails, of course. If you’ve never heard this one, please give it a listen. There’s even a mention of a week in Paris 🥺.

11. Episode 406, with the infamous Spider Prom, is Ace’s episode IMO—we finally get to see how he’s dealing with the loss of the love of his life and his best friend. He so desperately wants to somehow get back to being friends with Nancy, he resorts to spending countless hours with the help of S4 MVP Nick trying to catch Chunky Velez for her. Can’t We Be Friends? is the perfect song for him in this episode, gorgeously sung by Ella and Louis. That is, until he spies Nancy and Tristan dancing, and realizes what he can never have. Etta James’ blistering track I’d Rather Go Blind captures Ace’s feelings in that moment. He may have been the one to halt their attempts to brake the curse, but he’s hurting just as much as Nancy is.

12. I’ve got two seminal songs to represent Episode 407. When Nancy realizes that Ace let Chunky go, and hears his admission that seeing her with Tristan hurt, it positively screams Cry Me a River. No, not the Justin Timberlake song 😅. This epic torch song was famously sung by Julie London in 1955, and expresses beautifully Nancy’s scorn at Ace’s hypocrisy even as she admits that he broke her heart.

Their fight, and Nancy’s subsequent dashed hopes that Ace would call her bluff and come back, makes me think of Ev’ry Time We Say Goodbye. Another Cole Porter masterpiece sung by Ella. What can I say? You can’t top perfection:

Every time we say goodbye, I die a little Every time we say goodbye, I wonder why a little Why the gods above me, who must be in the know Think so little of me, they allow you to go

I dare you to listen to this track without weeping over the Nace of it all. Enjoy!

Well, Drewds, we’re just past the halfway mark of Season 4 and this post is already a novel, so I’m going to stop here for now. What did you think of my picks? Any you think I missed?

I’ll do a Part 2 as long as I get a few notes on this one 😂 . It will feature more classic songs that represent Nancy and Ace as they head into the back half of the season. I know it’s going to get rough ahead, but I promise the music will be sweet.

Update: Part 2 is here!

[batterygarden]

h. hi do u have any thoughts about levi / floch and if so may i hear them ^_^; .. relationship thoughts , perchance 🐺

YA <3 ..... sfw but no minors on my page pls

Levi

Levi is surprisingly an excellent baker…store bought desserts are often too sweet or artificial for his tastes so he just makes them himself and he’s really good at it! Baking for you easily becomes one of his love languages..

This can pose a slight problem when you sneak into the kitchen while he’s in the middle of his process and try to stick a finger in whatever batter/filling he’s mixing. He is SWATTING your hand away at the speed of light… giving you that disappointed, tired stare like “we literally talked about this :/”

He’s not a monster though—he’ll let you taste stuff if you just use a clean spoon! Keep the filthy mitts AWAY >:(

He’s into wordle lmao. And he doesn’t explicitly ask or state it but he expects you to do it with him everyday….it’s a collaborative project! He’ll be in the other room like “okay. I’m checking out the wordle now.” And if you just respond with an acknowledgment without dropping what you’re doing to come assist him he’ll peek his head in on you like… did you hear me? Im doing the wordle 😒! And you better make haste to go join him!

He spoils pets more than you…. & I think he’s seriously baffled that you’d wanna deny them human food. Gives you the straightest, most serious face and is like hey. your son is sad. he needs a piece of that sandwich. Looks at you like you just kicked a puppy in front of him when you say no.

You tease him for how particular he is about seemingly random things a lot… one day you bring up the cup holding thing and he sets his mug down like “Oh my god is this going to be a whole thing? It does not need to be.” You exhaust him!

If you’re ever sick he is concerned but also full hazmat suiting… Do not expect any kisses till you’re recovered and he is certain you’re not contagious. This man will wear a mask around you if you have a SNIFFLE. But he also is preparing soup, medicine, tea—whatever you may possibly need he has it ready…. He is an acts of service king of course he won’t leave you hanging.

Undefeated back rub giving KING. He’ll wear this bored expression like he’s thinking about something else while he absolutely DEMOLISHES any knots in your muscles…leaving you a comfortable jello consistency. It’s so routine for him—he knows the exact expression you’ll wear on your face before asking for a back rub and he’s gotten so familiar he’ll stop what he’s doing and motion for you to lay on the bed before you even get the words out.

He’s not shy asking you to play with his hair, especially because he knows you really enjoy it, but he will also ask you to wash your hands first….it’s nothing personal but he just watched you take your phone into the bathroom with you and he already showered tonight :/ It feels like a reasonable request.

His insomnia is annoying as hell when you just wanna fall asleep cuddling and stay cuddling all night. He’ll usually come cuddle for a bit when you fall asleep and occasionally he will fall asleep like that for a little while… but after at most an hour that man is sneaking back up to drink some tea and do paperwork or smth :/ Then he wakes up before you so bed empty in the morning :(

Floch (was scared bc u love him so i kept it brief )

Big banter enjoyer… This man is insanely sarcastic and dry and he loves when you’ll stick to the bit with him—he’s also never once shied away from teasing you for stupid stuff.

Oh thank god! I was really worried you’d remember the notebook you need for class today—What a close call 😮‍💨. Let’s head back. 

Right! I’m just glad we’ll manage to miss the train because of it !

He gets really puffy under eye bags so you teach him hydrating and soothing skin care that’ll help. He ends up really liking your self care ideas… the next time you see him you’re walking in on Floch leaning back on a chair with cucumbers on his eyes wearing your robe and one of your headbands… he’s so zen at that moment he doesn’t even notice you taking his picture. It becomes a point of tension when you won’t delete it as your lock screen afterwards for weeks.

He will fight dirty to get you to do what he wants. Maybe you were thinking of joining some friends for a girl’s night out at the bar… Floch is prepared with your favorite movie and some persuasive words to make you remember how much you prefer staying in with him! 

He will drop bad news in the form of doorknob confessions… like by the way my parents need to stay here this weekend! See ya. 🚶(leaves and turns off his phone)

He’ll make fun of you for the shows you’re into then be fully invested in them….. Fully pouts because you watched an episode of Fruits Basket without him like ???? He said he didn’t like it :/

[yaksha-lover]

I'm curious, but how exactly does the sire bond work?🤔 Is it different from person to person? Because in an ask about RSA the MC was said to be basically fully devoted to them if turned by them, but that type of devotion doesn't seem to present in the others?

Either way, sire Lilia is SUCH a concept. Wow. I'm sweating, going blind, going insane, SWOONING. Asking to be turned JUST to have Lilia as a sire-

There are multiple parts to it, both social and instinctual. Everyone turned feels instinctively loyal to their sire, but it is something that can be overcome by another stronger will. However, the social aspect to it is the much stronger part and the context matters a lot.

Specifically for MC being turned by RSA, that situation involved them saving MC by turning them into a vampire. So that dynamic is already strong because MC views them as basically saviours, giving them a second chance at life. Plus, RSA is nice. They are kind, especially Neige, and develop a good friendship with MC while they recover. RSA never restricted their freedom, like Lilia did, so that’s also part of why MC is so thankful and immediately loyal to RSA. A combination of instinct, affection, and thankfulness.

Now in comparison, Lilia’s relationship with the boys of the mansion isn’t quite so straightforward. For a lot of them, the context in which they became vampires was more like a deal where both of them get something out of it then a ‘thank you for saving me out of the goodness of your heart’ type thing. So it isn’t quite so personal and the thankfulness is much less.

Also, other than Diasomnia and some of his other friendships, Lilia doesn’t maintain a very close relationship with most of the residents. There is a sort of distance that both means they don’t have an affectionate loyalty between them and there is space for the original sire bond to lesson over time.

That’s why, although it would feel difficult, some of the boys like Adeuce or Epel may be willing to go against Lilia to help MC, because their friendship/affection/loyalty to MC is greater than the sire bond.

Similarly, if RSA ever threatened the mansion (they wouldn’t, but still), MC would still be able to go against them to protect the NRC boys. So it’s not as absolute as it might sound.

Also, I feel like Lilia would be such a tease about turning you into a vampire. He’d make you practically beg for it, partially because he wants to know that you’re sure about the decision and partially because he enjoys it. And once he does, he’d be sure to teach you all the best parts about being a vampire~

[elendsessor]

no fusion run mini update

the demifiend’s ex girlfriend gets beaten up by a trans archangel, woman with nails so long it’s scary, and monke, more details at 7.

had to put some skill points into vitality because i was kinda getting nearly murdered in the sea of random encounters before getting to baal.

now with chiaki dead, i’m actually doing a bit of a revision to my team because of how luci’s fight works. going to have to use raidou as my second damage dealer no matter what because the only demons of mine that have focus aren’t going to do well, he’s the only one with pierce, pierce can’t be mutated into, the only way i can get pierce on everyone else even through fusion is via metatron, etc. luci is one big dps check because he can, at any given point, bust out diarahan, something the people who got dante from the devil may cry series never get to worry about. whatever sadist at atlus decided to give the hardest boss in the game a full heal better have gotten a raise because they’ve probably crushed many dreams.

but i also need a better healer. i love titania but i can’t get her to null ailments and she’s very squishy. the only demon i can recruit that can null ailments, has no weakness to the elemental attacks luci has, and have set up in the compendium to mutate a couple skills to get better ones… is suparna.

yeah the bird with the stupidly annoying death cry? actually op if you put in the time and effort.

there’s a couple problems though.

first, they’re insanely underleveled right now. no real issue because merciful’s exp wield can cut down grinding time but it’s still grinding time. i have a ton of unused incenses sitting in my inventory so i can boost some of the stats quicker, plus the chance for incenses to be gifts are amazing.

second, the unchangeable stuff. stone hunt is a garbage skill outside of low level runs and garuda gets generally better skills. wind cutter is the best wind element skill that isn’t tornado, plus he gets endure at level 67—a skill my team is lacking. there’s also an unused skill slot they have just sitting there. taunting me.

the goal is to have bufula change to dekaja and diarahan to mutate into megidola before chaining into prayer. the dekaja is so i can set up provoke without luci getting the attack buff and just in case of emergencies to begin with, and prayer because luci loves status ailments.

not sure about keeping zandyne or what i would even aim for. suparna is going to be a fully support-based demon, so i technically don’t need an attacking move, and i can’t get rid of mazandyne which is a good alternative. i’m considering debilitate but i already have debuffing moves across the entire team that cover the bases so having fog breath + debilitate feels repetitive. then again, i haven’t used any of those skills outside of provoke in ages, mainly because provoke recovers mp, and i could be out-dekunda’d. mana surge is the other option since prayer costs a ton of mp, with each time used to recover it being one less bit of damage. it definitely could be remedied with a maxed out magic stat though. still torn, but i’m likely going to go the debilitate route if i decide i absolutely have to.

of course i’m gonna be training up the rest of the team too. need some emergency switch-ins and a good group to knock out kagutsuchi first and foremost since luci is a back to back fight. gay snake and uber pixie are the primary revivers and are tanks at heart. don’t know how that’ll work for everyone else. lilith has life drain so if i have to go the stall route she can take some hits.

because of the lack of pierce, i do need to max out strength and vitality on the boyfriends asap.

decided in the meantime to go for a personal goal in the upcoming grinding session: try and fully master as many magatama as possible. yippee.

at least this is the final push before i’m free from playing megaten games until smt 5 vengeance where i’ll probably get beaten to death by something.

[the-wrat]

Hello tumblr would you care to see my reactions to the burrows end finale anyway here they are:

(thanks for reading if you do i guess)

god new Tula is so unhinged and I love it like wtf is that jumpsuit idea

implications of lukas knowing about cocaine are stoats have either done it or like watched scarface or smth right

"twerking on a gearshift"

god I hope they ram the humans

noooo thorn

oh god oh fuck oh pants oh sheeeyiit.

my god the flying squirrel scene is right out of an animated kids movie

holy moly the arc from refusing to understand anything to "well, help us understand"😭

RIP Carlos Luna gone too soon

absolutely loving this new map scale

well this is gut wrenching (both figuratively and literally)

wait is Siobhan from the forest? why is she going back to the forest

this time on burrows end:

Iyengar and Mulligan: Rules Lawyers Divided

(good on Brennan trying to twist the effect tho, it was worth a shot)

oh god the betrayal poor bhint baby

oooooooh shit oh pants oh dammit Aabria why

I hate this

I resonate so much with Brennan's dead inside voice rn

if Jaysohn dies I WILL riot

Jesus fucking Christ in hell people

oh im gonna be so emotionally devastated after this

I may never recover

KILL IT JAYSOHN FUCKING KILL IT DEAD

HELL YEAH JAYSOHN CATCH THE BULLET

so frikin cool thas the pants (meant like that's the shit)

man that baculum is tough, huh?

of course the villain in the story wants to bomb everything it's a cold war era story

love the new york accent meat suit thing, 10/10 bit

wow radiation bad whoda thunk

I think i need an image of jasper screaming to react to stuff with

I second the Emmy nom

wait it's called the dimensional dome??!?

this is pantsing insane

oh my god they won I didn't even think this was possible

no not Jaysohn please not Jaysohn I'll do anything cmon you can't do this please no. help.

okay he's not full dead we still have hope ppl.

ah yes nuclear power plants, well known for having their own ice cream trucks.

okay I fully forgot about Lukas is bhint baby okay

ooohhh beans

oh.pants.

final sacrifice?

past Tula really said "all I wanted was to fall asleep, close my eyes and disappear"

this is so sad but that was a truly amazing speech

oh nooo an epilogue time to see how my prediction of "bittersweet" turned out. somehow, after all that, I think it's not gonna happen

peace and love bb

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

stoat pres!

man the whiplash of going from almost crying to "Kenji do that little dance"

Dr. Stoat!

oh shit they never said a stoat couldn't play sports!

literally hyperventilating Air Jaysohn is real and he made it to the Olympics

do they have weight classes in long jumps?

BRIGHTER THAN THE SUN SWIFTER THAN THE WIND PANTS YEAH!!