#abusive loceit

[naminethewriter]

You're Not Alone

Chapter Three: Alone No More

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Back again with the @sanderssidesgiftxchange gift for @edupunkn00b! It's slow going but it's going! Only one more chapter and the epilogue left. Hope you enjoy 🥰

Summary: Logan, Janus and Remus are celebrating their first Christmas as a married couple but a snow storm strands both Janus and Remus elsewhere, leaving Logan home alone. Knowing that the situation will trigger their husband, Janus and Remus need to find a way home.

Content Warnings: implied/referenced child abuse, mentions of panic attacks and flashbacks

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The door swung open to reveal a person covered from head to toe in thick clothes. Clothes that Logan recognized from this morning when Janus had left for Patton’s. His husband hates the cold so even for the few hours of sledding he had dressed like he was going skiing for the entire day, though he hadn’t worn everything for the drive. Now though, he wore the thick jacket buttoned up to his mouth, the hood up and a pair of sunglasses that were designed to keep snow out of the eyes. And it was obvious that it had been necessary with how much snow was clinging to his clothes.

“Would you let me come in, darling? Despite the many layers, it still feels like I’m freezing,” Janus said after a few moments of Logan simply staring at him.

Logan went from frozen to hectic within a few seconds. He pulled Janus inside and shut the door with more force than necessary. He began to wipe the snow off Janus’ clothes with bare hands, all the while rambling anxiously.

“What happened? How did you even get here?! Why are you here? Weren’t you at Remy’s? You must be freezing! What if you have hypothermia? We can’t get to a hospital in this weather!”

Cold hands grabbing his own startled him out of his panic. Janus had taken off the hood, glasses and gloves and his heterochromatic eyes were staring into his blue ones.

“Breathe, darling. I’m fine. Yes, I’m cold but that is a good sign. If I were hypothermic, I would be running very hot. If you would be so kind and get me a towel, I’ll get out of these clothes and we’ll talk about how I got here when you’ve calmed down, okay?”

Logan nodded, still shaking slightly. Janus gave him a task to focus on, something concrete to do and that alone helped him calm down. Still, he hesitated to leave, a part of him convinced that this was an illusion, that Janus hadn’t actually come home, that he was still alone.

His worries must have been written on his face because Janus smiled and squeezed his hands.

“I’ll be right here when you get back, starlight. I promise.”

That was enough to reassure Logan to set off to the bathroom. On his way he counted his breaths, in for four, hold for seven, out for eight. His heartbeat had mostly normalized as he opened the cupboard they kept their towels in. He grabbed one larger and two smaller ones and made his way back to the entrance.

It was silent as he travelled back through the hallway. He couldn’t hear Janus and again, he worried that he had just imagined the ringing of the doorbell and his husband coming home, but as he rounded the last corner, there he was, on the floor, struggling to pull off his boots. He smiled at Logan and suddenly he felt so much lighter.

This was real.

Janus was really there.

He wasn’t going to be all alone.

“Thank you, dear,” Janus hummed as Logan handed him the first towel. He wiped his face with it, then pulled off his slightly damp socks and wrapped his feet in the soft material with a sigh. Logan moved behind him and dried off his long hair, though it was barely wet, safely hidden under the hood and scarf Janus had worn. Said articles of clothing hung on their coat rack, dripping water steadily on the floor. They should move those to the laundry room soon.

Again, it was almost as if his husband read his mind when he commented:

“I should probably take a shower after taking this all to dry in the laundry room.”

“While I do agree with moving the wet clothing, I do not believe showering is the best option. If you do have some form of hypothermia, warming up too quickly could have adverse effects and I know you tend to use hot water to shower,” Logan argued while his husband pouted at him.

“Then how am I supposed to get warm again?”

Logan blushed slightly and avoided eye contact. Despite being married to both Janus and Remus for months now and having previously dated a couple years, he was still rather shy about openly showing affection. He cleared his throat.

“Sharing body heat is probably the best method.”

He didn’t need to look to know that Janus was grinning at him teasingly.

“Is that so?” he hummed. “Then are you willing to share your heat with me, my darling?”

“Of course I am. But we should get you into some dry and warm clothes first.” Logan didn’t hesitate in his offer, but his cheeks do turn a deeper shade of red.

“If I was Remus, I would suggest leaving clothes out of it entirely, but I would love to put on one of my sweaters, actually.”

Logan sighed at the mention of his other husband. He hoped he and Roman had managed to find a hotel room to stay in. They should call them once Janus was taken care off.

“I’ll put the clothes away, would you be a dear and fetch me my self-care day outfit?” Janus asked with a smile that Logan found he could never say no to. Not that he wanted to, he wanted to know his husband was not freezing to death sooner rather than later.

“You are the best,” Janus said when Logan nodded. He gathered the jacket, scarf, boots and other equipment he had taken off, pressed a kiss to Logan’s cheek and disappeared down the hall.

Logan himself went upstairs to their bedroom, but as he tried to enter, he found the room locked. Right. Of course it was. A precaution he had agreed to. And a necessary one at that since he could vaguely remember having a flashback intense enough that he would have locked himself inside if he had had the opportunity to do so. Janus had told him where he hid the key this morning in case Logan actually needed to enter their room for whatever reason since he wouldn’t remember during a flashback. And maybe it was the aftershocks of having one, but he couldn’t recall where the key was.

“Janus?” he called, after having walked back to the staircase, hoping his husband would hear him.

“Yes?” came the quiet but clear response.

“Where is the key for the bedroom again?”

“In the kitchen, under your Crofter’s jar!”

“Right,” Logan mumbled to himself before calling a thank you to his husband and going downstairs to retrieve the item.

He found Janus there already, only dressed in a long-sleeved shirt, leggings of some kind and his house shoes. He held the key out for Logan to take while using his free hand to set up water to boil, presumably for tea.

“You want some as well?” he asked as he handed over the small object.

“Yes please. And sorry for making you wait.”

“It’s alright. This layer is completely dry and warm enough for now.”

“I will still hurry.”

“Thank you, darling.” Janus pressed another kiss to his cheek and Logan hurried back to their bedroom, the promise of cuddles with his husband and a cup of tea very appealing to him as he was hit with a wave of exhaustion.

~~~

Ten minutes later, Logan and Janus sat beside each other on the couch, their legs tangled together under a blanket and each with a cup of their respective favorite teas in hand. Janus now wore his hair tied in a loose bun, his favorite yellow sweater and very comfy pants that Remus liked to steal from him occasionally.

Logan couldn’t be more comfortable but still he couldn’t quench his curiosity.

“Would you mind explaining to me now how you got here?”

Janus sighed and leaned forward to place his mug on the coffee table.

“It’s simple really. I walked.”

“You walked?”

“Yes.”

“From Remy’s to here?”

“Yes.”

“Through a snowstorm?”

“Yes, dear.”

“Why would you do that?! Do you not understand how dangerous that is?! You could have died! How did you not die?”

Logan was shaking and Janus carefully extracted the cup of tea from his hands and placed it beside his own before pulling him in a hug.

“I was well aware of the risk, honey. But what else was I supposed to do?”

“Stay where it was safe! Wait until the storm had passed!”

“Knowing you were here alone? Knowing you were already on the brink of a panic attack as soon as you hung up? I couldn’t do that, Logan. I never want you to have to experience those flashbacks again. I hate seeing you hurt like that. It breaks my heart and if you would allow me to pay that woman back for what she did to you, I would in a heartbeat, as would Remus. I think he has at least twenty different plans on how to make her life hell written down somewhere. I couldn’t stand the thought of you being here, alone, for however many hours it would be until the storm clears. I had to get to you. No matter what.”

“You could have died, Janus,” Logan said, his voice breaking. Both of them were crying, clinging onto each other as if it was the only thing keeping them alive. It felt like it was to Logan at least.

“I know. Remy told me so at least a dozen times. But you’re more important.”

“I’m not more important than your life!”

“To me you are.”

Logan sobbed and hid his face in Janus’ chest. His husband let it happen, stroking his hair and nuzzling against it.

“The important thing is that I made it here. Don’t think about what could have been and just be happy that we’re here together. You can still yell at me tomorrow.”

“I will.”

“I know. I’ll look forward to it.”

“You are incorrigible.”

“I know.”

“I love you.”

“I love you, too. Now rest. We can prepare dinner together after a nap, okay?”

“Okay.”

Logan didn’t move and Janus made no attempt to separate them either and soon, both drifted off.

~~~

They awoke a few hours later to the doorbell ringing constantly and someone pounding at the door.

“LOGIE?! ARE YOU OKAY? CAN YOU HEAR ME?? OPEN THE DOOR! I WON’T LET YOU BE ALONE ANYMORE!”

The calling continued as Janus and Logan looked at each other with wide eyes.

“Remus?!”

[edupunkn00b]

Objections

It's 2001, Seattle, Washington.

Janus Pater has fought every obstacle - literally and figuratively - to survive as long as he has. Logan Croft is a young father and is married to his old college girlfriend, Kelly. Their law professor's flippant partner assignment has forced these two disparately orbiting men together.

Roman and Remus Prince are sophomores at the associated undergraduate college. To their fellow students, they're identical, however they approach life and solve their problems in very different ways.

Somehow, (most of) their paths cross in one way or another. Buckle up, because it's a bumpy ride.

Objections takes place chronologically before Happily Ever After but should be read after and contains spoilers for that story.

Spotify Playlist - [ AO3 ] Rated: M - CW: domestic abuse, swearing, homophobia, slow burn roceit, slow burn platonic loceit, referenced self harm, referenced suicidal ideation, consent questions, villain OC

Chapter List

Assumes Facts Not in Evidence Pt. 1

Assumes Facts Not in Evidence Pt. 2

Assumes Facts Not in Evidence Pt. 3

Ambiguous

Best Evidence

Hearsay

Asked and Answered

Speculation

Argumentative

Relevance

More Prejudicial Than Probative

Cumulative Evidence

Compound

Non-responsive

Privileged Communication

[thecrowslullaby]

Of friends, foe and fae

Chapter one-A dance with Deceit for @sandersidesbigbang

pairings: prinxiety, (platonic) logicality, platonic loceit warnings: slavery, abuse, kidnapping, blackmail, manipulation, mention of death, implied death (he got better)

Shoutout to @pompomqt and their wonderful drawing as well as @8beez who drew the cutest Logan I have ever seen. And of course to @rosepetalgold who screaming with me in the docs and helped me complete the story in record time, as well as @warcats-cat and @lickoutyourbrains who were witness to my late night rambles about the fic <3.

read on ao3 | next

Virgil sat in the corner, clutching the elegant glass almost hard enough to shatter. The liquid in it tasted of ash, making it yet another reminder his time was long overdue. He shouldn't be here. And from the looks the nobles gave him, they all shared his sentiment. 

Five years. 

Five years of breathing borrowed air wasn't enough for him to accept his fate. He should have been executed, strung up as an example for any fairy unfortunate enough to be caught attempting a murder. Yet here he was, thrust into the middle of nobility once again. But this time there was no kitchen wall to hide him from their glares. 

And he had one fae to thank for his predicament. 

Deceit

An odd name for a creature unable to lie, but certainly not an unfitting one. Deceit was a fae of few truths and even fewer virtues, serving no one but themselves. They were the reason Virgil's heart was still beating, despite his crimes. Pumping cold blood through dead veins.

What a pathetic excuse for a life it was. 

There was no joy in an existence like this. No joy in this half life of fear and uncertainty. Not when this arrangement could end as easily as it started. Without a warning or an explanation. A servant in life and death.

And worst of all, Virgil still didn’t know the reason he had been spared from looking at the insides of a casket. It wasn't like Deceit to share secrets, after all. No matter how many times Virgil asked, the fae wouldn't tell him why they had decided to keep him at their side. 

He knew there must have been a good reason to do so. Who would risk everything they'd built just to rescue a near stranger from the clutches of death if they didn't gain anything from it? Certainly not anyone from the nobility. And even less so someone who had nearly gotten murdered by the very person they’d tried to save. 

Which meant Virgil must have some value to them. Some significant use. He just has to figure out what it is. 

"Dance with me," Deceit’s voice demanded. The glass cracked as Virgil tightened his fist. Not enough to shatter, but certainly enough to not be presentable anymore. Just like him. 

"Since when do you ask?"

"It wasn't a question." He glared up at the fae. They stared at him expectantly, gloved hand extended in an invitation. He could feel the crowd staring at him. Waiting for one more misstep that would finally send Virgil tumbling down. Deceit seemed to like keeping him dangling on the edge. As if keeping Virgil just a breath away from death wasn't enough. But then again, the nobles had ordered Virgil around as they’d pleased while he was still a fae. Why would his half-dead state change anything?

He grabbed the hand hard enough to bruise, yet Deceit's smile did not falter.

They led him forwards, gowns and tailored coats twisting around them in a storm of colourful fabric. Trapping Virgil in the swirl just as the music slowed down.

Deceit raised their arm forward, bent at the elbow. Slowly, Virgil connected their hands at the wrist. Cold veins rubbing against soft fabric just as the music began anew. 

Bodies flowed around him in elegant twirls as he struggled to remember the steps he’d learned by watching the princes dance. 1,2,3, step towards Deceit, step away, 1,2,...

“You’re bad at this,” Deceit commented as they glided over the dance floor so effortlessly Virgil almost felt jealous.

“Have you brought me here just to mock me?” It wasn’t like ballroom dancing was a skill the working class cared for, and Virgil was certainly doing better than average. 

“Please.” The fae rolled their eyes. “I have plenty of opportunities to do that back at the estate.” Ah yes, the estate. The very one Virgil was expected to treat like a home. "I've brought you here to dance with me. And so far you're doing a dreadful job."

Virgil scoffed. If Deceit was so insistent on having him as a dance partner they should have thought about teaching him steps before bringing him here. But he bit his tongue. Wouldn’t want to anger Deceit too much in one evening.

“You’re scheming something, aren’t you?”

“Isn’t that what you always accuse me of?” Deceit asked amusedly. Virgil felt his cheeks growing colder. “But yes, I am. And you’re part of it.”

“I have no choice in that matter, do I?” 1,2,3, change directions, 1,2,3. 

“You’re always welcome to leave.” Virgil cast a quick glance around the room. As much as staying under Deceit's command was a mystery, leaving their side was a sure way to end his life. Or what was left of it. For as much as he complained about his half life, it was still better than the threat of the unknown. He still clung onto the hope of getting it back. No matter how unlikely it was.

“I never asked you to keep me.”

“Nor have you made any protests against my offer.” Virgil stumbled to catch up as Deceit changed directions again. 

“You’re just keeping me to use me.” He shouldn’t start this argument, but it seemed his words flowed as easily as wine tonight.

“Aren’t you?” Janus asked, leaning in. Lingering far longer than music dictated. It took all of Virgil’s courage not to step away. To not lose the silent battle that had dragged on all these years. “Tell me, Virgil," he whispered low enough for his name to be lost to the sound of music coming to a crescendo. This was another thing Virgil hated about the arrangement. Deceit knew his name. They hadn't used it to give Virgil a command. Yet. He wasn't sure how long this ruse of goodwill would last, though. "Is there any fondness for me in your heart? Or is it simply convenience?” They stepped away smoothly just as the music faded again, bowing slightly. Virgil had half a mind to bow back.

“Don’t blame me for your mistakes.” There was… something in Deceit's eyes. Anger? Frustration? Regret? If he didn’t know the fae he could almost mistake it for worry.

“I-”

“May I cut in?” Both glanced at the newcomer and Virgil recognised them immediately. Cedar. If his blood were still warm Virgil was sure it would start to boil as soon as he saw them. 

Cedar stood with his hand extended towards Deceit. That ever-present smirk still on his face, despite the fact that Deceit's expression looked sour enough to curdle milk once they laid eyes on him. They quickly composed themself, putting on a much more neutral expression.

“I assume the half-dead-thing is not good company.” Virgil grimaced. If there was one thing he and Deceit had in common, it was their distaste towards the fae before them. 

“I wouldn't want to leave my ward unguarded after his return to society.” Deceit’s voice sounded sour. Just barely. But after five years of living with them, Virgil managed to find the small hints of emotion in the other’s behaviour. And he could tell Janus was fighting a losing battle not to let their anger slip. "He might be rather scared, and I take good care of all things and fae under my care."

Cedar, as always, took little interest in others' opinions. 

“Why don’t you fetch us something to drink, helot?” He spoke in a voice that made it clear she wasn’t used to having his wishes dismissed. 

Virgil took a step back and Deceit turned their head towards him immediately. Daring him with narrowed eyes to leave their side. 

Virgil gulped, not wishing to be caught in a spar between the two. Again. Fleeing while he still had the chance seemed like the safer option. Even at the prospect of having to deal with Deceit's moodiness afterwards. And as much as he despised Deceit, he had to admit that the fae was certainly better suited at dealing with politics-or whatever this was-than him.

"Of course, your Lordship." Virgil didn’t miss the way Deceit’s eyes narrowed. Their glare burned a hole into his skin, but Virgil chose not to address it. He might be under their command but that didn’t mean he was going to be caught in any more trouble unless given a direct order. Dancing certainly wasn't a skill Virgil enjoyed nor possessed and he had no desire to stay in Cedar's presence either. "I wouldn't want to step on your feet even more, Deceit." He finished with a bow towards both fae before quickly making his retreat. Leaving Deceit with Cedar as the music began to play. 

***

Janus glared at Virgil’s retreating form as the next song started slow. It gave Cedar the exact opportunity Janus was desperately trying to avoid-a chance to talk. They braced themselves for the no doubt unpleasant conversation to come. Though calling it that would be an understatement for how much the fae in front of him loved to talk. Three ranks below Janus and she acted as if they were the Queen herself. 

Deceit cursed under their breath as Cedar laid her hand just above their waist, successfully trapping them even more.

Janus could feel the court's eyes on them both. Watching with unhidden interest how the situation would unfold. Cedar had been particularly friendly with them lately and Janus knew very well that friendliness from most court members didn't come without a reason. She wanted something and Janus feared they knew what it was. 

It was just their suspicions, of course, but it was best not to make conclusions about just what Cedar had found out about them. The last thing Janus needed was for Cedar to gain more knowledge than they already possessed. 

“You’re awfully fond of that little half-dead thing, aren't you?" Cedar mused as she twirled Janus around the dance floor with ease. "I was sure you'd be bored of it within a few months. Certainly keeping it around for show must not be worth all the trouble you're no doubt going through to make sure it still breathes. So there is another reason to keep it, isn’t there?"

Janus chose not to answer. Cedar in turn gripped them tighter than necessary as he sent them into another twirl. Janus was starting to feel like a puppet mindlessly being flung about by a child making sure the grip on them was hard enough not to lose its toy. 

Cedar most likely thought they would run as soon as he let go of their wrists. Which would have been a fair assessment if it weren't for all the eyes on both of them. Janus had a reputation to uphold. Stoic and cunning. Unmoved by other fae’s pettiness. Stomping on a court member's foot before storming off would not do it well. No matter how tempting it was right now.

“You think keeping quiet will convince me you don’t care about it?”

“I care about most things considered mine.” Janus was trying their best to keep their voice levelled. There was no reason to drag Virgil further into any of this. Whatever it was Cedar had planned, Janus would settle this alone. “I would even go as far as to say, between the two of us, you’re the one who seems rather obsessed with him. Asking questions about him every time we meet. Wouldn’t you agree, Cedar?”

“It must be awfully dreadful living in that secluded estate of yours,” Cedar mused, not surprisingly changing the topic as soon as the conversation started to flow in a direction he didn’t care for. “You don’t seem to mingle with the court at all, going so far as deliberately avoiding most of its members. The twins don't visit you all that often anymore and I certainly can’t imagine that thing you keep around is very lively.” Janus bit his tongue in order not to say just where Cedar could stick his tasteless puns. 

“He’s decent company.” Janus glared at the fae. Unlike you. 

"Surely you could do better," Cedar laughed. The sound grinding against Janus’ ears like nails on stone. "Mingle with someone closer to your status."

"You're successfully keeping me from it." Janus kept their expression blank as nails dug into their hand. 

"Are you suggesting you value your little servant more than me?" 

"What if I do?" Janus smirked. 

“Careful there, Deceit, someone might get insulted.” Cedar leaned in closer, clearly trying to intimidate them. As if Janus wasn't used to it all by now. 

“That’s rather the point, Cedar.” They were both past the point of pretending to tolerate each other's presence by now, which seemed to annoy Cedar to no end. There was only so much persuasion one could do when the other fae clearly hated you. 

Fortunately, violence had stopped taking its toll on Janus long ago. Their expression stayed calm despite the other fae’s nails digging into their hand even further. They would have drawn blood if it weren’t for the gloves.

When the song ended Janus almost breathed out a loud sigh of relief. They tried stepping away, but Cedar was holding them in place. Nails digging into their wrist and waist. Daring them to cause a scene. 

"Let go of me," Janus hissed. If they didn’t make their leave before the next song started they’d be trapped. Stupid. Of course Cedar would pull a stunt like this. No foul play was below that pesky fae. 

Cedar simply smiled in turn. Swaying away as soon as the music started, far sooner than anticipated, and taking Janus with him. It was a slow waltz again and Janus started to suspect Cedar might have bribed the band. 

"I still have a few things to discuss with you." He smiled. "And you're awfully hard to catch, Dee." Not hard enough, unfortunately. 

"What do you want?" Janus hissed. 

"Marriage."

Janus almost laughed. Now that they didn’t expect.

"If you want my blessings, all I can offer you are prayers for the poor soul that's going to bind themselves to you."

"Our marriage, Deceit."

The golden fae scoffed. The audacity. 

"My, my. That's one hell of a love declaration."

It was Cedar’s turn to scoff. 

"Don't flatter yourself, Deceit. It's not you but the Queen's favour I'm after and we both know it."

"That's rather bold," Janus taunted, "stating your plans like that.” 

“I’m a fae of ambition.”

“Sadly, not of honour.” 

“Is that any way to talk to your future spouse?” Cedar scoffed as he continued to twirl Janus around, the grip on their wrists growing stronger. If this continued any longer, Janus might end up losing their hands.

“You talk about it like I don’t have a say in it. Are you really so confident in your own stubbornness?” Janus mocked. “I don't deny the advantage you would gain, but pray tell, why on earth would I agree to such an arrangement? I'm not a selfless fae, after all." 

"I think the question 'what do you have to lose if you say no'? is far more interesting." 

"I'll indulge you. What is it?" 

"Your little pet." 

Janus scoffed at the half-formed threat.

"You overestimate how fond I am of him."

"Why do you keep him around, then?"

Janus bit their tongue, not trusting their words not be turned against them for such a direct question. There were reasons Virgil was to be left under their care. None of which should be discovered. And certainly not by Cedar. 

Staying silent on the matter proved to be a mistake as Cedar’s smile grew. The fae clearly gained confidence as it spoke further. "It's rather a mystery how you came into the possession of a criminal, isn't it?" 

"If reading the official courtroom summary is far too lengthy of a novel for you, then I suppose you could describe it as a mystery." They watched in mild amusement as Cedar’s expression soured. ”But I can assure you most fae are well aware of the circumstances and there is nothing mysterious about it."

"You're not afraid of gossip?" 

"We can't lie, remember?" Janus smirked. "Gossip is nothing more than an inconvenience a few well-aimed questions can’t solve."

The music slowed down again but this time Janus was ready, twisting their hands in time to dig their own nails into Cedar. 

The fae hissed as they jumped back, knocking into a pair just behind him. This caused enough of a commotion to allow Janus a swift exit. Leaving Cedar's voice frantically spewing apologies behind them.

They hadn’t made it far from the dance floor when a pair of arms grabbed them. Dragging Janus into a secluded alcove. Their shoulder cried out in pain as they felt themselves getting slammed against the brick wall. 

"What is he doing here?" a voice far too familiar hissed just above their ear. Was everyone here a barbarian? 

"I was under the impression you were fond of Anxiety." Janus crossed their arms as they finally glanced up. They could see Roman dressed in green once again. His posture growing nervous under Janus' gaze until the prince took a deep breath and straightened her back. This gave her a few inches of height advantage over the golden fae.

"He shouldn't be here, Dee. You should have kept him at your estate." It sounded almost like a plea but Janus would have none of this.

"Oh, so you kept him alive just so he could be a prisoner, then. His life hangs on nothing but a thread of goodwill, your highness?"

"Dee."

"Oh, don't 'Dee' me, Rose." Janus crossed their arms, staring their former ward down. "It isn't fair. To either of us and you know it." 

Roman bit her lip. A habit from childhood Janus hadn’t  quite been able to drive out of him. Fortunately, the young prince's teeth weren't too crooked from it. 

"I'm… scared." They’d noticed. Rose barely visited them anymore.

"You think he isn't?" Roman shifted his gaze to the floor. "He's terrified. Has been for the past five years and you won't let me explain to him why he's still alive.” Or as alive as he could be after the Queen’s 'mercy.' 

"You're good at keeping secrets." 

Janus chuckled as they shook their head. 

"Doesn't mean I want to, Rose. He thinks of me as a villain and I can't find it in myself to blame him for it."  Roman continued to chew on his lip and Janus had to resist nudging her ribs so she would stop. Roman was an adult now, no babysitting him. Even if he clearly needed guidance. "Can you talk to him, please? For me?" 

Roman hesitated. 

"Alright, but not tonight." Janus took a deep breath. It wasn’t worth it to ask for a promise. It wouldn’t account for much coming from Roman, anyway. "Why did you even bring him here?" 

Janus' expression soured. 

"I needed a dance partner and Blackwood has been missing from the last few parties."

Roman burst out laughing and Janus did their best to shush her quickly. Drawing eyes never did any good. 

"I was under the impression you were quite popular."

"Unfortunately."

"Are you regretting your position in court?" 

"Aren't you?" The sudden shift in Roman's pose told Janus all he needed to know. Their mother wasn't… an easy fae to be around, so when she had announced she was to have children the court in its entirety had held their breath until the time to view her offspring came.

Twins. 

It was clear from the moment both children were introduced that one of them was a human. Yet no one dared to utter a word. Not in front of the Queen, at least. That would have been a risk none of the court was foolish enough to take. 

The princes, on the other hand, did not have the luxury of holding the other fae’s lives in their hands. 

Roman had taken the worst of it in the first years, suffering all the watchful eyes yet none of the respect that should have come with being a Queen's child. After all, it wasn't a place he belonged to. Plump red cheeks, warm like a fire, loud and cheerful. He looked so unlike his sibling. So unlike any fae child.

All the glory was pushed on Remus. The court trying desperately to have the fae outshine its human sibling. Playing a dangerous game in order to prevent Roman from ruling them in the future. 

It should have broken the children, set them against one another, but to Janus’ delight it only strengthened their bond. The two were inseparable now. 

And indistinguishable. Over the years the two had grown to look so much like each other that they could switch places as easily as Janus switched pairs of gloves. 

And they used that advantage to its fullest. 

Roman found it far easier to mingle with the court. After all, she had an advantage over all of them. He could lie. She replaced Remus for more than half the parties now. Enjoying a world she didn't get to be a part of growing up. 

Remus, in turn, had taken delight in being ignored. Spending its days in the garden, chasing scorpions and butterflies. Janus' flowers had suffered from almost all of its adventures but they couldn’t bring themselves to chastise Remus for the few breaths of fresh air it was allowed to take.

“I can be your dance partner as long as you don’t bring Anxiety.” Roman extended his pinky, breaking Janus out of their thoughts. The smaller fae grinned at that. Oh how childish the little prince could be. “Do we have a deal, Dee?”

“And how many dances would I be entilted to?” Roman grimaced, as if he wasn’t expecting the question.

“Two.”

“Hmmmm. That doesn’t seem too tempting. I want three.”

“Two and I’ll try to keep an eye out if you need a swift rescue.”

“Alright, two. And one extra tonight. I only got one dance from Anxiety.” Roman rolled his eyes, throwing her head back with the motion, and Janus couldn’t help but laugh.

“You’re impossible.”

“Hmmmm. I’d say I’m impressive, irresistible, and incredible.”

“Incredibly annoying, maybe.”

“Rose.”

It was Roman’s time to grin as she extended her hand towards them.

“Deal?”

“Deal, you nasty little sprout.”

[im-an-anxious-wreck]

Memories Aren't Important... Right? chapter collection

AO3 link

Summary: Remus wakes up in a house that's not his own, in a bed that's not his, and seemingly four years in the future.

A man with purple hair and a man in a blue tie have also lost the last four years of their memories.

Even though the other three of their unknown and forgotten housemates say everything is fine… their memory gap just doesn't add up.

Something about it… about everything just seems… off.

Rather unsure of what is wrong, the three of them navigate friendships, work, life, and maybe even love.

(Superpower AU anyone?)

Consistent Warnings: cursing

Brief/mentioned Warnings: car anxiety mention, car crash description, Janus' jerk parents die (non-descript), suggestive jokes, references to alcohol, mentioned past abusive parents, murder mentioned, spouse abuse mentioned, (some of them have some shitty parents okay), hypothetical unrealistic death mention, there's like one kiss

Universe: Superpower AU

Perspective/main character: rotates between Remus, Virgil, Logan, Roman, Patton, and Janus (all six sides)

Side/secondary characters: Dr. Amne (oc villain)

Appear: various ocs

Mentioned: Emile (from Cartoon Therapy)

Romantic relationships: intruality, prinxiety, loceit

Platonic relationships: everyone else really

Word Count: 56,464

Link to my collection of TSS fanworks

This is for the @ts-storytime's big bang challenge

Find the awesome art that goes with it here by @starshineandbooks!!

Thanks to @poettheythem for betaing!

Chapter index:

Chapter One • Remus

Chapter Two • Virgil

Chapter Three • Logan

Chapter Four • Roman

Chapter Five • Roman

Chapter Six • Patton

Chapter Seven • Logan

Chapter Eight • Janus

Chapter Nine • Logan

Chapter Ten • Virgil

Chapter Eleven • Janus

Chapter Twelve • Patton

Chapter Thirteen • Roman

Chapter Fourteen • Virgil

Chapter Fifteen • Janus

Chapter Sixteen • Patton

Chapter Seventeen • Remus

Chapter Eighteen • Virgil

Chapter Nineteen • Janus

Chapter Twenty • Roman

Chapter Twenty One • Logan

Chapter Twenty Two • Remus

-

No reposting, likes are nice, and reblogs are very much appreciated! | Taglist (ask to be added or removed): @someoneiwasnt

[tss-storytime-summaries]

26

Expected Rating: Teen

Warnings: PTSD, child abuse, child neglect, physical and emotional abuse, discussions of trauma, abelism, homophobia, arophobia, self-hatred, intrusive thoughts (Remus-typical), panic attacks, emetophobia, illness, and hopefully that's it :*)

Characters: Remus, Roman, Janus, Logan, Patton, and Virgil. With kid!Remus and kid!Roman in flashbacks, and appearances from Thomas, Emile, Remy, and Cartoon Therapy characters.

Romantic Relationships: Background Remile and Dot/Larry, with possible endgame Dukexiety, Loceit, and Royality.

Summary: Sanders Academy of Art offers a wide range of programs for prodigious students entering high school. Prospective students face a harsh acceptance process, two separate auditions, and a whole lot of paperwork on top of the whole deal.

I, Emile Picani, happen to oversee these auditions, and the future education of six very special students.

The odds of these six boys ending up in the same dorm room for the next school year are astronomically low, but here we all are. When they meet for the first time, things aren’t exactly stellar, but! They still have plenty of time to win over the hearts of their new friends.

It would be nice if that were a little easier, but hey, working on your emotions takes time, and it’s not something all 14-year-olds are used to. They just happen to have… a lot of emotional problems.

Nothing a certain resident counselor can’t help with! (*cough*)

Facing a brand new school, no familiar faces, and enough combined baggage to fill the average commercial airplane is tough, but now, they have each other, an amazing school that lets them focus on their dreams. Perhaps things are going to work out better than any of them could have expected.

(AKA a shameless high school au where all these boys have autism, need therapy, or both)

[5am-the-foxing-hour]

Hey! I was wondering if you’ve read a Janus fic where he’s like right out of an abusive relationship and he’s living with the sides (who he doesn’t have a good relationship with) until someone (I think Virgil) pushed him into a panic attack and they realize he’s been hurt.

it was loceit, and I think Janus’s parents were dot and Larry from cartoon therapy

I'm sorry, but that doesn't ring a bell.

Maybe someone of my followers knows

[acescreations]

Fusion Sides Part 2. Loceit

[I wrote this as a continuation of What They Have which I'm not going to tag because I'm rather partial to my writing being able to be found. These are probably definitely going to become part of a series I randomly decided to make.]

Summary: Logan is trapped in a fusion with Deceit, and this slowly causes him to lose his sense of identity. (A.K.A. I like making Logan suffer and I'm sorry.)

Characters: Logan Sanders, Deceit Sanders, Virgil Sanders, Pride Sanders, Apathy Sanders, Patton Sanders, Roman Sanders

Warnings: Snakes, Snake bites, Injuries, Physical numbness, Manipulative Deceit, Choking, Dark Sides, Identity loss, Violence, Passing out, Panicking (let me know if I missed any.)

Ships: Royality

Word Count: 2093

I had to get out. 

I ran for the walls of what I assumed was our combined consciousness in the fusion, hoping there was some way out hidden within the dark, towering dome, when I felt a stinging pain in both my wrists before getting pulled to the ground. I looked down, feeling my arms going numb, and there were two snakes clinging to me with their fangs stabbed into my wrists.

I tried to stand back up, but the vipers pulled me down more, forcing me into a kneel. I then felt two more snakes crawling over my legs. I looked back at them and watched as the two snakes which had formed out of the ground tighten around my legs, dragging them down until my legs had disappeared beneath the surface.

We searched around for Deceit, finding him raised on a pedestal, another snake laying calmly across his shoulders. "Deceit, what's going on?" I practically screamed up at him. "What are you doing?" 

Deceit looked down at me, glaring, and we realized far too late that he didn't actually care about me. And we couldn't believe I had let myself fall for it.

That was when Virgil had walked in, calling for me. I opened my mouth to speak, but was cut short as my neck was lunged at, constricted as it was also pulled down. I instinctively gasped for air before remembering how most nonvenomous snakes kill their prey depends on just that. I calmed my breathing as Deceit began speaking, his words repeated in a raspy voice by us. "I'm afraid there is no Logan anymore. From now on, you may call us Loceit."

Virgil stared, wide eyed, before backing out of the room, turning and running towards the commons. We watched him leave, screaming at him to come back, to help us, but of course, all he even could have heard was the static and the beeping.

We calmly watched him leave, waving a hand at the door, willing it to close. Once the door had closed, we turned from it, locking it with another swift hand gesture.

We saw a door on the other side of the distorted room, one we didn't recognize. We walked towards it and opened it, revealing what looked like the commons, but it was darker, more faded. It appeared to be in a state of disrepair.

Standing by the door, waiting for us, was somebody that looked somewhat like Roman, but wearing black rather than white. His entire outfit was so much darker, and somehow more extravagant. He had dark red shoulder tassels, and a black crown rested on his head. He walked up to us, examining our body. "Hmm, let me guess, Logic? Good choice." In his expression, there was mainly curiousity, a sort of mild interest, but hidden behind that was something else I couldn't quite recognize. 

"Get out of my way Pride." We waved a dismissive hand at him and before we turned away from him we caught a glimpse of that unrecognized emotion again, and we realized it was fear.

We were already the leader here, and now we have even more power. And that makes us terrifying.

From over on the worn couch, we heard a voice we immediately recognized as Apathy. "It only makes sense. Not only will Logic be the least likely to be missed, it is also the best factor to have influence over."

As if on cue, we sensed Thomas calling, Virgil having brought up our absence. Thomas was of course anxious, and I tried telling him, telling all of them, that I needed help, but then I felt the fangs in my wrist deepen, and our mind went fuzzy.

We're fine, Thomas. There's nothing to worry about.

We didn't actually believe that, and we wanted to keep calling for help, but the numbness now flooding through our body kept me from doing anything.

Thomas did believe the lie, and then we no longer felt him calling for us. We realized there was no way of getting out.

That night, we saw the binary in our right eye begin flashing red, and through our left eyes the entire rooming began warping. It felt like we were unfusing. We stood jerkily, stumbling to our room. In that time, I could feel the grasp on me weaken, and I became able to think again. That was my chance. I tried pulling myself back up. I was almost able to stand before being pulled back down again. Our fusion reached its room, sitting down against the wall. Its tongue went towards the nearby outlet. We gasped as we felt a sudden jolt, the red flashing in our right eye stopping, the lines of code returning to its normal green. Our mind went numb again. 

We began falling asleep as we sat there, recovering from the drained feeling. We knew we couldn't let ourselves lose that much power again. We almost fell apart.

We forced ourself to stay awake, knowing that if we fell asleep like we wanted to, we'd completely lose control. Then we'd really have no way out. We struggled to stay awake the entire night, even as the fusion fell asleep, barely keeping ourself conscious. 

The next morning, we felt the buzzing in our head end, only to be immediately replaced by the numbness from the venom reaching my mind. And so the events of the previous day repeated, with us struggling to find a way out, or even just keep from passing out.

We couldn't help but wonder how this was effecting Thomas. Apathy said that we were the best trait to have influence over, and we assumed that meant Thomas was having some sort of change because of this. However, we couldn't find any sort of connection to Thomas through the numb fog surrounding our mind. 

This became our life for... we didn't even know how long. Life for us became timeless buzzing of fatigue, and it really did seem like nobody missed us. Any time when Thomas called us to a video I just made Logan tell him that he's fine, but can't make it. So then I'd be able to manipulate Thomas's line of reasoning without me or Logan ever being there.

Even when desperate little Virgil brought their attention to Logan's constant absence, I doubted they'd actually do anything to get him away. We did end up getting pulled into the other side of the Mind Palace, being met by Royality demanding I release Logan. 

"Oh, that won't do much good anyway," I hissed at them. "There's barely anything left of Logan anymore." At this point, I doubted there was much left of Logan at all. I hadn't been paying attention to him for at least a month now.

"You're lying!" I blinked slowly as I turned to face Virgil, the little brat being too loud to ignore. I took a step towards him. "Do you care to test that, Virgil?"

We felt a sudden pain in our abdomen and pulled our head up, as much as we could with it being pulled to the ground, and we saw Royality pointing their wand at us. "I said to let him go!" They shouted at us, but of course, we stayed trapped. We watched Royality raise their wand again and braced for impact. We surpressed a scream of pain as another burst of energy hit us. We looked up, and the rest of us wasn't even reacting.

Our vision flashed white as we were hit again. And again. And again. And again. And again.

"You're only hurting him, you know," we heard the raspy voice speaking, giving us a moment to recover. We tried to keep ourself from gasping in pain as we listened to my voice. "The only person you're hurting right now is Logan, and that is not a lie."

I smiled as Royality lowered their wand, clearly realizing that there was nothing they could do to me. I watched them as I began turning around, receiving no reaction as I began leaving.

We jerked our head up, panic setting in and clearing some of the haze from our mind.

They're really just going to watch as we leave? Don't they know I'm still trapped in here? No no no no no no no they can't just leave me I can't do this anymore they have to get me out please please please help me I can't do this get me out please help me help me help me get me out of here please please please please please 

I ripped my hands from the mouths of the snakes holding them down, ignoring the extreme pain from my wrists being ripped open as I wrapped my hands around the snake coiled around my neck. I ripped it away from my throat, fighting away from the vipers trying to get their fangs back into my arms. "LET ME OUT!" I screamed, the fusion stopping in its tracks as my voice came out, real words through the static instead of code. "I DON'T CARE WHAT HAPPENS TO ME, JUST GET ME OUT OF HERE!" The vipers grabbed hold of my arms again as our throat was constricted, even tighter than before. My head was pulled all the way to the ground, then all we could do was watch as we were stared at. Then Royality nodded to themselves before raising their wand again. We braced for impact. Our vision went white as we felt the hit, then faded to black. 

When we opened our eyes, the first thing we noticed was how we were in a bed, which was unusual, since we usually just sat against the wall as we charged. Then we noticed our room looked bigger than usual. And brighter. And blurrier. Then we heard a voice beside us, even though we never let either of the others into our room. "... it's been three days, and he was in there for months. What if he doesn't wake up, and it's our fault?" I squinted towards the voice, and I saw Pride standing over someone we didn't quite recognize. We thought it might have been Deceit in his disguise, but we were part of him, so that couldn't be right.

"It's gonna be okay Patton," we heard Pride saying. "It's Logan, he'll get through it."

Patton. We recognized that name. We searched through our memory, trying to think of where we recognized it from. Our eyes widened as we remembered where it was from. The other Sides. We're at the other part of the Mind Palace. 

Patton looked at us as we stared, wide-eyed at him, and we began panicking. We might hurt him and we'd have no way to stop ourselves.

"Logan, you're awake! Are you okay? How do you feel?" Patton leaned closer to us, dangerously close. This was the closest anyone had ever come to us, and there was no way he'd be allowed to get away with it. We pushed ourselves back, ignoring the pain in our entire body. If we're moving ourselves then this was the most control we've had over ourselves in an eternity, and we had to use it to keep Patton as safe as possible. However, Patton kept coming closer, holding his hands out to us. "Logan, you need to lay down." We pushed ourselves away until we felt our back hit the wall. We began curling in on ourselves. "Get away from us!" we screamed, but we paused as we registered our voice. It sounded completely normal. No raspy, whispering voice. No beeping, no static. We looked down at ourselves, breathing heavily. It was a familiar body, but one we barely recognized anymore. We-I looked up, into the concerned faces of Patton, Roman, and Virgil, who had apparently joined them. 

As I sat there staring, I remembered what happened. I remembered Loceit being summoned. I remembered the pain of being hit again and again and again by the energy from Royality's wand. I remembered having to rip my hands from the mouths of snakes, the feeling of them tearing open my wrists, how my nails dug into my neck as I struggled to pull away the serpent around my neck so I could speak. I remembered blacking out, and waking up here.

I leaned up against the wall behind me. "I'm myself again," I said in a sigh of relief that came out more as laughter. Then the pain of everything caught up with me again, and I blacked out.

[loganofthenorth]

Do you have any ships you don't like?

Ever just look into your inbox and realize you have a bunch of asks you forgot about? Ha could be me

That was going to say couldn't be me but auto correct changed it and it's not wrong so I'm leaving it

Anywho, ships I don't like? Yes of course, I have many.

Obviously there's the forbidden ship r*mr*m that shouldn't even be a thing so I'm not going to dignify it with a paragraph

Then there's Logicality which I've written about before. I used to like it, but after rewatching Sanders Sides twice I realized they aren't very healthy for each other in a romantic sense. Patton seems to make Logan out to be the bad guy when he's just trying to help, and Logan tends to snap when his patience runs thin. Also the Skip incident in SVS Redux, where Patton asked for Logan's input before silencing him because Logan's opinion went against his.

Then there's Intruality, I love it in AUs under certain circumstances, but it's a big fat No in cannon. It doesn't work because if you look at Sanders Sides from Remus's perspective, Patton is a manipulative abuser. If you look at Sanders Sides from Patton's perspective, Remus is a bad guy that lashes out for no reason. Like, sure, one could say that they might work through that and think they misunderstood each other. However, neither of them are technically wrong. Besides, considering that Remus exists because his version of creativity was morally frowned upon, and was therefore repressed so that Roman could be a morally appropriate version of creativity, a romantic relationship would be awkward at absolute best. Honestly if they do somehow work on their issues with each other, the best outcome would be that Remus and Patton's relationship would become a sort of father that abandoned his son and now they're reconnecting kind of thing.

Then there's Moxiety, this one is just because I see Patton and Virgil in a father/son relationship. Also, the fact that Virgil is Thomas's fears and fear is an emotion, which Patton has dominion over, it's possible that Patton is actually Virgil's father in the same way that Roman and Remus are brothers. I also believe that the Orange Side is anger, and if that's the case, he would be Patton's son as well.

I can go into that theory in another post though.

Next is Royality, and yes I know, you're probably sensing a pattern.

Now, don't get me wrong. While Patton is my least favourite character, that doesn't mean I hate him. I actually love Patton, especially in episodes like the puppet episode where he shows incredible emotional maturity that is really helpful to Thomas.

I also love how complicated of a character he is, and it's sad that the fandom simplifies him to just a happy, nice, cute, silly character, because he's more than that. He has severe depression, and a lot of issues that come from that. He also grew up taking catholic views to heart, following all the morals Thomas was taught as well as he can.

On top of that, he manages emotions, which is such an incredibly complicated thing to be in charge of. He manages instincts, like when Thomas feels good for doing something good, or when Thomas is hungry, or thirsty, or whatever else. He manages a large percentage of Thomas's likes, dislikes, sense of humour, inner child, and more. Patton has a large mountain of responsibilities, which adds to the complexity of his character.

He also appears to be very manipulative, whether or not he intends to be using manipulation tactics, I don't know. I think his character's too complicated to know that for sure. However, he's done a lot of love bombing, guilt tripping, and other manipulative actions that make him out to be this innocent good guy and anyone that disagrees with him to look like a bad guy.

Due to how complex of a character Patton is, and due to how he has made himself a father figure to most of the sides, it's hard to enjoy him in most ships in cannon. The only ship that works well for him is Moceit, in my opinion, because Janus is working with him to help Patton work through these issues. Patton is also good for Janus because Janus needs to learn how to communicate in a way that doesn't seem like he's attacking or sabotaging Thomas/the other sides.

Now, with that aside, back to Royality.

Royality is a very best friend or father/son relationship. More best friend in AUs and Father/Son in both cannon and AUs. I say more father son in cannon, because Roman has shown a desire to gain Patton's approval. He tries to follow Patton's rules, even though every time he finally manages to meet Patton's impossible standards, suddenly they change and turn around completely. (I have ranted about this several times and will likely do it again in future posts.)

Now, with those out of the way, yes there is more.

Next is Logince

I like Logince in AUs, and it's not that I don't think Logan and Roman's dynamic is amazing, it's not that I think they wouldn't work romantically, I just see them more as a brotherly relationship. Roman treats Logan like an older brother that he fights a lot with, but at the end of the day he just wants to be good enough for Logan. The way they talk about Patton to each other is a lot like Roman being a teenage brother complaining about their Dad and how lame/strict/embarrassing/etc he is to his adult brother.

Then there's Anxceit. This one I don't like because I see Janus as a mother figure to Virgil and Remus. I guess it could work in AUs, but to get their dynamic right, it would probably be a friends to enemies to lovers situation. Like Catradora. Also Janus and Virgil still have a lot of bad blood to work through, so if I'm wrong about the mother/son bond and they were just friends before, then Anxceit would probably have a lot of work to do and an awkward patching up before they can be in a healthy relationship.

Now there's Demus and Roceit. Which, maybe they shouldn't be on this list, because I do like these ships, but I do want to talk about them.

Demus I tend to feel meh about, it's basically dark side Royality. They work as a mother/son dynamic or best friends, not really romantic partners. However, I love them when it's Intruloceit, because I love Loceit and Intrulogical.

Roceit, this is friends to enemies to lovers galore. Roceit is not a healthy ship currently, but it's definitely an entertaining one. Due to Roman's insecurities and Janus using Roman for his greater plan, however, I don't know if a romantic relationship would work in cannon. It depends on where the story goes from where we are right now. However this is the perfect enemies to lovers ship for AUs if you get bored of Prinxiety's popularity.

Now what's interesting about Demus and Roceit is that if you believe in the theory that Roman and Remus were once King Creativity, which I do, and if you've seen the King AU, which I have, that adds all kinds of layers of complicated to Demus and Roceit. Of course, I may go over that in a future post.

Sorry this was so long, I hope you enjoyed my infodump!

[krowfics]

but I didn't know how so we took it in turns

Fandom: Sander Sides

Ships: Platonic Logan and Janus

Plot: Logan is a fae with no interest in humans, he meets a human anyway. 5 times Logan gifts Janus + 1 time Janus gifts Logan

Words: 6056

Notes: Fae AU, Janus is a 13 ish yro human, oops all autism, Logan can adopt a child as a treat, food mentions, insinuated child abuse, sensory issues and overload, panic attacks, stimming, alcohol abuse is vaguely implied, hurt/comfort

I uploaded this to AO3 yesterday on my bday which is exactly 2 months after Logan's bday which means this took an extra 2 months longer to finish than expected, happy late birthday Logan you have a son now

AO3

~~~

First gift A Meal

Logan wasn't a particularly tricksy fae. He was still fae, of course, but he only tended to use mushroom circles for practical, personal uses. Not as traps.

He'd sit there and read or work on one of his crafts on soft grass and the sun would never seem to set if he didn't want it to, it was simply an illusion but that was exactly what he liked about it.

There was the occasional animal that wandered in. He wasn't really bothered by the rabbits or deers who would stare at him for a moment and then either settle down or just leave. Crows sometimes offered a more interesting interaction, but their visits to his mushroom circle were few and far between. Logan didn't have a reason to make them stay, nor did he really want to keep something that didn't want to be his in the first place.

He recognized that was odd for a faerie. Even the kindest being Logan knew always had one of his countless animal friends on him at any given moment.

Logan did like having things, he hadn't gone mad, but his things were books and stories, little knick knacks and crafts. He didn't like others touching those, not without asking at least, they were his. Yet, he could never really fathom how to make that same logic apply to a sentient being. 

Besides, he didn't think he could handle the noise, Puff's pond always sounded like it was singing with various croaking frogs.

And such, Logan wasn't even trying. His ring of mushrooms was off the beaten path, quite a distance from where humans normally traveled and quite a distance from the other fae in the area. He expected the day to go on peacefully without interruption as per usual.

He was wrong.

Though he supposed he didn't mind terribly, not enough to jinx the poor boy at least.

He had fallen into the circle, breath ragged, eyes wide terrified as he looked around.

He was an odd looking human, definitely young. He was blonde, though his roots were oddly darker and half of his face was splotched reds but didn't look particularly injured.

When he saw Logan he looked so scared that the fae was surprised he didn't bolt out right. He scrambled back but didn't leave the circle. The two just stared at each other. 

"Salutations." Logan said softly, not sure what else to do.

It took longer than what would be seen as polite for him to respond, "Hello." he said, "I'm so-," he cut himself off, gaping for a moment. He glanced down to Logan's hand where he still held a book he'd been rereading, "I interrupted. I didn't mean to…"

"Well, I'd assume most humans don't intend to enter mushroom rings." he said lightly but the boy's breath hitched, that was apparently not the right thing to say. 

His eyes were jumping around, not making eye contact for more than a moment at a time. He hands clenched and unclenched the grass beside him in what was likely a self soothing manor. His clothing was ripped, stitched oddly in some places in what could have been an attempt to make it not hang off his frame so much.

He was scrawny and though the mark on his face didn't seem to be an injury, he was injured now that Logan was properly looking. a purple mark on his neck and a bit of discoloration on his forearm just under his sleeve, his right hand looked like he had punched something.

"I do not intend to make you stay here." He spoke carefully, "But you are welcome to stay if you wish."

The boy didn't move. Logan supposed he wasn't too much different than the occasional animal who wondered in.

"What is your name?" Logan asked.

There was a pause, "You may call me Deceit." That wasn't a name, good. Logan didn't like taking names.

"And you may call me Lunar. Would you like something to eat?" he reached over to grab an apple from a basket he had next to his pile of books.

Deceit stared at the offered fruit, "Th- I. appreciate it." he said stiffly, "but I have to refuse."

Logan blinked, and oh, right. That was a trick fae tended to use. Though he didn't think most were being malicious when they did so, it was only polite to make the offer. 

"I should have clarified," Logan said, "These apples aren't from fairyland, but you do not have to eat it regardless." 

The boy chewed his words for a moment, "I can't eat apples."

"Oh." Logan blinked, "There is a blackberry bush not far outside the ring, just passed the stream." He gestured, "You're welcome to pick those if you wish." 

Deceit nodded, "I appreciate it." he said but made no move to stand. Perhaps he wasn't hungry.

"I'm going to continue reading, you may interrupt if you need anything." Logan knew it was rude to read when there was a guest but he was quite excited for the next part of the book and the boy didn't seem keen on conversing anyway.

Deceit just stood eventually, after apparently having gotten his breathing more under control. Logan looked up from the story he had lost himself in to see Deceit shuffling his feet slightly, "I'm gonna go now." he said quietly.

Logan just nodded with a small smile and watched as the other left. Deceit looked back the moment he stepped out of the circle, eyes unfocused. The nature of fairy rings was to hide the content inside, so he must have looked like he disappeared to the boy.

He continued to watch Deceit cross over the small stream and head towards the blackberry bush. He looked over his shoulder again before he grabbed any like he was paranoid that Logan would appear again. Something tight unraveled a bit in the fae's chest when the boy started eating the fruit, and when Deceit walked away, Logan went back to his book.

~~~

Second gift An invitation

Logan hadn't expected to see Deceit again, but he didn't feel entirely surprised by his showing. There was some type of surprise more akin to panic when he saw the state Deceit was in.

Deceit was breathing heavy, his eyes glassy and red. He clutched at himself in some sort of self hug.

"Are you alright?" Logan spoke before really thinking the answer was clearly that he obviously was not.

Still, Deceit tried to respond. His mouth opened and closed a few times before he suddenly sat down on the grass. Logan startled, thinking he'd passed out, but the boy started rocking which did a little to put Logan at ease. He stepped over cautiously and kneeled in front of him.

He was on the edge of crying, but no tears had slipped out. His breathing showed no signs of slowing, Logan wouldn’t be surprised if the boy didn't even know where he was. He rocked consistently and, most concerningly, one hand came up to scratch and pick at his face while the other clutched onto the grass beside him. 

"Deceit?" Logan asked, "Focus on slowing your breathing." 

It didn't seem like he heard him. Logan knew better than to touch someone he didn’t know all that well mid panic attack but he wasn’t sure what else to do. He’d seen Duke pull at his hair when he started to get overwhelmed only for Prince to calmly take the other’s hands in his own and speak quiet words until he’d calmed. But Duke was very physically affectionate and very close to Prince on a personal level.

Regardless, Logan didn’t think he could handle a bleeding child right now. “Deceit, I am going to touch you.” He said, attempting at calm. He then grabbed the offending hand as gently as possible, with as easy to break away hold. Deceit flinched hard but didn’t pull away, he just blinked down at the joined hands and then up at Logan.

“You need to slow your breathing." He reiterated, "I'm going to count in for four, hold for four, out for four. Ready?"

Deceit nodded, a tear escaped then. The sight hurt, though Logan supposed it would for anyone. Niggling empathy making his chest squeeze.

He started counting. And Deceit clearly tried but he broke almost immediately, sobbing instead of holding his breath. Logan hushed him, "It's okay, you’re okay." His voice uncharacteristically soft, "Let's try again."

The boy nodded again and he restarted his counting.

After a few tries and a few successes, Logan changed the pattern, "You're doing well. In for four, hold for seven, out for eight now. One…"

Logan didn't really know how long he sat there, gently squeezing the boy's hand and speaking in soft tones before Deceit seemed to mostly recover.

He let go of Logan's hand, which Logan didn't like, and then apologized, Logan liked that even less.

"Why?"

Deceit just blinked, "It's not like I just showed up to a practical stranger's property mid freak out."

Logan stared for a long moment.

"I did. that." Deceit said, "I shouldn't have bothered you and I'm sorry. And- I know that means I owe you something, but I have nothing to offer right now."

"Why would you apologize for a panic attack?" The fae asked, utterly confused, "As far as I know, humans cannot have them on purpose."

Deceit rolled his eyes and huffed. Some strange human communication, Logan was sure, Duke had definitely done such an action before. Prince had to, despite being decidedly not human.

"Fine. I'm sorry, specifically for walking into your circle while freaking. I shouldn't have."

Logan chewed his lip for a moment, "Apology accepted, but still not strictly necessary. Do you know what triggered the panic attack?"

Deceit's shoulders hunched, "It's stupid."

"I doubt that." Logan replied.

Deceit squirmed a little, "A teacher was being an ass. He always says the same shit so I should be used to it.”

"A mentor was harassing you?" Logan spoke before he could really comprehend it.

Deceit just shrugged, "Teachers do that."

Logan felt a little flash of rage at that. He was starting to dislike humans more than his neutral to minorly negative opinion on them he'd usually kept. 

Even worse, his fairy ring was still off the beaten path. He was far from any trail or human school. How did the boy end up this deep in the woods whilst having a panic attack?

"Why'd you come here? Not that I mind, truly. It's just far from where humans typically gather." 

Deceit shifted, "I couldn't think of anywhere else to go." he admitted.

That unsettled Logan. Not home? Not to another adult? Not even to a friend? Logan found himself swallowing around what could have been empathy or anger. The child clearly didn't have much in lue of emotional support or anything else really.

"Well, I suppose," Logan started, "You are welcome to come here whenever you need."

Deceit looked up at him, some fear - he was still a human speaking to a fae - but also something hopeful. "I appreciate it." 

~~~

Third gift Kindness

Deceit was starting to become a regular visitor. At first, Logan worried something was wrong again, but he didn’t seem upset the next few times he showed. Typically not making much eye contact and fidgeting but nothing to indicate any real stress, just typical idle behaviors. Well, typical for fae, Logan still had no idea what was typical for humans.

He intended to ask Puff, as he had significantly more interactions with them, but if Puff questioned why Logan was suspicious about humans then he’d soon find out about Deceit. Of course, Puff would want to meet the boy. Logan wasn’t sure if that was a good idea when it came to Deceit’s safety.

Logan also wasn’t sure if he should ask Duke about it. Yes, he was human himself, but he was completely incapable of keeping anything from Prince, and Prince would absolutely tell Puff. So, Logan just didn’t seek help for this particular endevor and decided to just figure out how to read the child himself.

Today, Deceit was writing something, he said it was called homework, extra assignments his mentors made him do when he was not at school. It made sense at first until Deceit explained, it was clearly needlessly excessive. Logan couldn’t figuratively wrap his head around it.

Regardless, he supposed he enjoyed the quiet company as he was finishing up a bit of embroidery.

“I’m done now, Lunar.” Deceit said awkwardly, like he was afraid of interrupting. Logan just nodded minutely and finished up the stitch. He set it down and looked up to the boy. He was picking at the grass again, he did that quite a bit.

Logan opened his mouth only to shut it again, unsure of how to start a conversation. "What do you like to do when you're not doing school work?" he asked after a moment.

Deceit blinked up at him. He shrugged, "I don't know, I read sometimes."

"And what is it that you read?"

Deceit picked at the grass a bit more, "Um, stuff on snakes and Greek gods and um, human psychology, I guess."

Psychology was an interesting subject, Logan supposed. Though he couldn't say he knew much about humans or fae for that matter, outside of personal experience. And that personal experience was limited to Puff and Prince and the occasional trespasser or acquaintance.

"Tell me about human psychology." he prompted 

Deceit looked startled, "I, um. What do you want to know?"

Logan thought for a moment, "Well what was the last thing you read up on?"

Deceit looked like he was a strange mix of eagerness and fear. Like he desperately wanted to talk but knew better to bite his tongue. The eagerness won over, and Logan was glad.

"So, um anxiety can be developed but it can also be genetic. It's basically the part of the brain that tells us to be scared that we're in danger having an imbalance in the chemicals it's releasing, which makes someone feel like they're in danger even when they're not. I've been trying to figure out- and I think I have. My little brother has really bad anxiety and I couldn't figure out if he was just like that or if somethings been happening at school, or if it's just what dad… regardless, he's really anxious a lot and he doesn't talk much, plus he fidgets and rocks like me so I think he's autistic and that's a one way road to bullying, in my experience-" 

Deceit suddenly looked up, "How long have I been talking?"

Logan blinked, "Just a few minutes."

Deceit winced, "Sorry."

"Don't be," He was interested in what the child had to say, why was he apologizing? "Continue, please. What is autism?"

Deceit pressed his lips together for a moment, "It's a, um, neurotype. So some people have different brains than others, I guess kind of the same way people have different hair colors? But most people are what's called neurotypical and so human society developed to help them and not the rest of us. There's a theory that different neurotypes evolved to help the human species as a whole, ‘cause it'd be helpful to have a few humans who knew tons of stuff about one specific thing. Like which berries to pick or how to take care of livestock. Having different sleep schedules for guarding the village and stuff." Deceit shrugged miserably, "But autistics typically have sensory issues and fidget a lot and generally act odd in comparison cause we can't read their social cues so people are assholes to us."

Logan squinted a little, "And humans do not typically have those instincts?" 

Deceit shook his head, "Nope. Bright lights and constant loud noises mean nothing to them. And they lie all the time cause they're able to speak in this weird silent language and they don't have sensory issues but they lose their minds if you don't make the facial expression they think you're supposed to. Plus, they don't like anything. Like they only casually like things, they can't ramble about anything unless they're just talking about the events of their day."

"I don't think I'd like most humans." Logan stated.

Deceit nodded solemnly. "I- uh. Rambled again, sorry."

Logan huffed a little at that. "You said that humans cannot ramble, do they not like when others can?"

"It's annoying to them."

Logan tapped his fingers idly before twisted a little to rummage through his things. He pulled out a black feather.

"This is a crow's feather." He said simply, "A flight feather specifically. There are tiny, tiny indents that refract the light reflecting off it, allowing it to look as if it is changing colors depending on the angle one is looking at it." 

He continued on, Deceit stared at the feather, asking a question every once and a while. Logan wasn't entirely sure if the child got his real point; that talking was in fact not annoying to him or any other fae for that matter. But he supposed, if he continued to have conversations like these with him, then maybe Deceit would start feeling more comfortable to speak in this little mushroom circle. Logan wanted to give that to him at least.

~~~

Fourth gift Hug

Deceit was jumpy this time. He did seem to be a bit jumpy most of the time but it was noticeably worse today. 

He didn't speak much when he arrived, only mumbling out a polite greeting. He seemed on edge then, bad enough that Logan noticed when he was clearly trying to hide it. But Logan figured it'd be rude to point out, perhaps the boy would relax now that he was away from the other humans.

And yet he only got worse. He wasn't twisting the grass between his fingers like usual but had his hands squeezed into fists, resting on his lap. 

He was rocking slightly, with eyes cast down like he was searching the grass.

Logan chewed his lip, he didn't want to pry but something was clearly off. He should ask him about it, "Deceit?" 

The child flinched, minutely, but it was clear as day to Logan.  If he hadn't been concerned before, he certainly was now. .

"Are you okay?" Logan asked quietly. Deceit flinched again, pressed his lips together and nodded, which was a blatant falsehood. His eyes were still locked to the ground, squinting like the grass was too bright.

Flinching at noises, eyes casted down, hands avoiding touch at all costs. He almost looked like a scared child trying to behave, he also looked like a fae about having a meltdown caused sensory overload.

Logan carefully and quietly moved to be by Deceit's side. He looked around, at a loss, typically one would give some sort of self regulation tool to the overloaded party. Puff liked to pluck petals and leaves off plants, Prince would typically sit and stare at a candle flame, and Duke tended towards some sort of squeezable fidget.

But there was nothing here. Well, there were flowers but Deceit was avoiding grass currently so that likely wouldn't work out, and there were things that could be lit on fire or squeezed, but none satisfyingly so. Logan didn't bother to keep such things as he usually had his hands full with a book or craft, he’d snack if he was understimulated. And, well, his primary sensory need when overstimulated required another being, as embarrassing as it is for him to admit.

Perhaps...

"I am going to touch you." Logan said.

Deceit looked up then, horrified. Logan would've asked permission but he wasn't entirely sure if Deceit would respond in this state, or if he'd deny immediately assuming all touch would only serve to overstimulate him further.

Stealing himself, Logan wrapped his arms around the child firmly. Deceit jolted and for a terrifying moment, Logan thought he'd made a mistake. But Deceit relaxed against him and some tension leaked out of Logan's own chest. He let out a breath of relief. That had actually worked. 

They stayed like that for a while, Logan uncaring of the time that passed. Eventually, Deceit started tapping his finger on the back of his other hand, some sort of stim Logan was yet to see him do.

And then Deceit pulled away, pushing at the other's chest gently. Logan let him go.

"Sorry."

"Was I correct in my assumption that you were overstimulated?"

Deceit nodded.

"You've nothing to apologize for then." Logan said, "Did the pressure stimulant help?"

Deceit blinked up at him, "The hug?"

"It's a- bit firmer than a regular hug but yes."

Deceit thought, "It did, normally touch makes it worse."

"Yes, fainter touches tend to. Normally, I'd prefer asking before touching but I feared adding more noise to your stimulus would be counterproductive. The pressure usually works so I figured…"

"It's like those weighted blankets then?" Deceit asked, moreso to himself, Logan wouldn't know how to respond regardless. "That makes sense." the boy continued, "I appreciate it."

"I- Of course." Logan managed, he opened and closed his hand for a few moments, his own fidget to help him think, "Were there any particular triggers?"

Deceit looked at him warily. His eyes squinted like he was trying to decipher what he was asked, that or he was trying to decide whether to trust Logan. The fae assumed it was the first.

"Anything particular you can recall that led to the overload? Sometimes they just happen, of course, or they come on due to irritation rather than a specific sensory input, but it can be useful if you know the specifics as to avoid them in the future."

Deceit blinked owlishly at him. And then he looked away and shrugged, "Nothing. I was upset and everything started upsetting me more." he grumbled.

"Why were you upset?" Logan asked, only realizing that what he said could be a distressing question after Deceit began to look increasingly uncomfortable again, "Nevermind. Just… I am here if you'd like to talk about anything."

~~~

Fifth gift Pendant

Logan had felt like he was buzzing in wait all day. Deceit had arrived, he didn't come everyday so Logan had a sparse idea of when this opportunity would arise. And it did arise, now all Logan had to do was give it to him.

In Logan's pocket was a length string and a pendant. It was logically very light but it felt like it held the weight of iron siring through the fabric.

Deceit had brought an old and tattered book, he'd read it before, both in Logan's presence and out of it. It was about owls, apparently one of many in the series. Deceit was awfully fond of the snake characters. 

Deceit actually liked snakes quite a bit, they were his favorite animal. Knowing that fact is what made Logan choose a gift at all.

He'd been looking at his trinkets, distantly still thinking about the child's chipper rambling earlier that day when he saw a simple pendant. It was a two headed snake he had made long ago. A gem eye of each head was visible, one sapphire and one citrine. The silver body of the snake was oxidized to a black color with only some accented scales peaking through the shining silver color.

It was a piece he had made mostly out of boredom, something to do with his hands. It was well done enough for him to wear, which honestly didn’t mean that much when compared to his mass of bits and bobbles tied to him most of the time. Nonetheless, he hadn’t worn it in a very long time and there was no point in it gathering dust on his shelf, especially when he looked at it and thought of nothing but Deceit.

It had a mild luck enchantment, and a protection spell only strong enough to prevent it from minor nicks and scrapes. Anyone with a rock and a purpose could still damage it completely if they'd tried. Logan worried a bit as he had very little to go off of when it came to luck charms on humans but Duke always had at least one on him at any given time and he seems fine, or as fine as Duke could seem.

Logan fiddled with the pendant. He didn't give gifts to other fae often. He'd given animals treats a few times and shiny things to the crows who'd appreciate them. And on rare occasions, he gave things to the acquaintances he knew, but none of those were truly gifts, typically it was something to thank them for something else. Puff was kind and good with healing, Logan had found himself giving him something in thanks of that a handful of times over the years.

But this was different. This was a human who turned down every food Logan offered until he saw it best to stop offering. He turned down borrowing books or even trading for such things. Deceit seemed like he switched to a written script when turning Logan's offerings down, like he'd heard warning of accepting gifts from fae. Most humans would refuse such things, wouldn't they? By all means Deceit will likely do the same now.

Logan wouldn't force him to take it. He knew it made him an unusual fae but he wouldn't even insist, Deceit didn't enjoy much of his life, at his school or his home, save for a little brother he clearly adored. Logan didn't want to take away what may be one of the only places Deceit felt comfortable by putting pressure on him into accepting something he didn't want to. 

He hoped the child felt comfortable here, he didn't wish to risk it regardless.

The fae took a deliberate breath. He should just offer it already, if only so Deceit could turn it down and Logan could stop thinking about it.

"Deceit, when you have a moment." Logan said softly.

Deceit gave a tiny nod to show that he had heard but continued reading on. After only a few moments he looked up, shutting the book without any marker on where he'd left off.

"What's up?" he asked

Logan chewed on his words, before deciding to just pull the necklace out of his pocket. 

"It's a gift. I had made it for myself long ago but I've no use for it now, and I thought you might enjoy it. I suppose, it reminded me of you, though you may turn it down if you wish, I do hope you accept." Logan avoided the child's eyes while he spoke, focusing on covering all the bases, only looking up to offer the metal snake.

Deceit took it carefully, his expression unreadable. He analyzed it, thumb running over it gently. 

"I appreciate it." he said eventually.

Logan felt himself relax at the rush of relief, "I'm glad." 

Deceit continued to stare at it for a long while, Logan found himself speaking before he could help it.

"The one eye is sapphire and the other is citrine, though they're both small and not purposeful enough to carry much of their power. For all intents and purposes, they're just visually appealing."

Deceit smiled, "They are visually appealing." He said, "It's very pretty and detailed, I can see all the scales, how'd you make it?"

Logan blinked, "I suppose I haven't told you about my metal work yet." he said, something close to pride worming its way through him as he saw Deceit's eyes light up, eager to learn.

~~~

First gift

Janus was not going to have a panic attack.

And he absolutely was not going to have one in front of Lunar. That had already happened twice now, and during their first two meetings at that. He was fae, he had to be offended, even if he assured Janus that he wasn't, maybe it was a three strike system, one more time and he'd be done for.

Not that he actually believed Lunar would ever hurt him.

Plus there was that sensory overload and all of the rambling that Lunar claimed to somehow find interesting. Janus wondered if the rumors about fae being unable to lie were true. He was too nervous to ask Lunar yet.

Lunar had been so nice to him, trying to offer food that Janus had always turned down despite his desperate hunger some days and inviting him to spend time with him, encouraging him to talk about his interests and helping during sensory overloads. And then there was the necklace.

Janus fiddled with the charm that was normally hidden under his shirt. He doubted that his father would ask about it but Janus wanted to avoid such a scenario just in case.

It felt like.. something. Something Janus couldn't quite figure out how to describe. It was hard to describe but it felt different than it should. Whether that be because of some strange fae thing or if it was because it was a gift from a.. from someone he cared about. He wasn't sure if he could say friend when referring to Lunar. It's not like Janus had any current friends to compare their relationship to, and Lunar was an adult, fae adult, but adult nonetheless and… Janus wasn't sure why that mattered.

Adults could be mean and controlling, just trying to maintain their power. Most adults were like that. But teenagers also tended to be mean and Janus had met some who weren't, so naturally, not all adults were cold and distant at best and glorified bullies at worst.

But kids weren't supposed to be friends with adults, for some reason. He understood the danger of strangers, both human and fae, obviously, he wasn't dense. But that didn’t instantly mean that every person over the age of eighteen was evil.

Kids also weren't supposed to like their younger siblings. He had never understood that, but half the people at his school spent a significant amount of time complaining about their siblings, especially if there was a large age gap between them.

Yet, Janus could not think of a single reason to be annoyed with Virgil for longer than a few moments, if anything, he gave Janus anxiety pains by finding the oddest places to hide, typically someplace high up that Janus could not fathom being able to climb. He could fall or get in trouble and Janus wouldn't be able to defend him from their father.

People also weren't supposed to like faeries.

Janus had thrown that idea out the window not long after meeting Lunar. So, maybe they were friends and humans were just stupid. 

And Janus was /not/ going to have a third panic attack in front of someone who might be his friend.

Even if that meant he had to stop his trek through the woods, stare at a random nearby plant, clutching the pendant in one hand and a delicate box in the other, forcing himself to breathe like a regular person. With one last deep breath, he dropped the pendant, letting it fall to the front of his shirt on display for the all woods to see, and carefully resituated the box into both of his hands again.

Two hands because his cargo was far too precious to drop.

There was a little bakery near Janus’ house. He got treats for him and Virgil sometimes, mostly with morally fine, but stolen, money and the hunger of a child who had barely eaten all day. Mostly because he was a child who barely ate all day. 

The owner was kind enough to let people buy heavily discounted leftovers from the day before that Janus and Virgil would get and have to eat before they got home and were questioned.

He’d never bought fresh baked goods there before, until today. He’d been saving up, sourcing from anywhere, walking dogs, searching under vending machines, and of course, taking a few singles here and there that his father didn’t notice.

He could've got something cheaper, something factory made, but fae didn't tend to appreciate that stuff. Or at least, they aren't supposed to. Ideally, he would've made it himself, but he didn't know how, let alone have free range access to a kitchen.

So he did the next best thing, honey glazed apple fritters, handmade from a bakery. Lunar nearly always had apples nearby, so Janus assumed he was at least somewhat fond of them. He offered the apples to Janus several times before laying off, Janus felt bad refusing, but he also felt too awkward to clarify that it had more to do with the texture of raw apples than the fact that it was a gift from a faerie. He had also brought other things early on, bread and berries and such, but Janus had still been too nervous to accept.

He wasn't sure about the honey, every story he heard stated that fae loved honey without exception, but they also often stated that it was intoxicating. He was weary, he could see how that would make Lunar uncomfortable to accept the gift. Not to mention, the weariness of giving an adult something akin to alcohol, he never had a good time when adults around him decided to drink.

Janus stopped again, forcing himself to breathe. He looked around, having lost track of where he was. He recognized the area, and wasn't that odd? Weeks ago, he would've thought that any two bits of forest were almost indistinguishable from each other, but now he saw individual trees and the familiarity of the path that had not been walked on enough to be visible.

He turned and continued on, soon finding himself in front of a ring of mushrooms. He couldn't see Lunar, but if the fae was there, then he likely already saw Janus.

The human stepped through, it was always a little disorienting as he suddenly saw past the illusion. He blinked at Lunar's sitting form.

"Ah, Deceit, hello." he greeted.

"Hi." Janus would never admit that his voice shook but Lunar didn't seem to pick up on it, luckily. He swayed on his feet for a moment before stealing himself, "I brought a gift for you."

Anyone else would say that Lunar looked mildly interested at hearing that, but Janus could tell he was ecstatic, more of a reaction than he thought he’d get. But, then his gaze flickered to the snake necklace, "I hope this isn't a form of repayment for anything as that wouldn't be necessary." he said wearily.

"Oh, no." Janus assured, he'd heard of the fine but important line between a trade and a gift, though he didn't think anyone would turn down repayment of something already traded away. Regardless, the thought of this misunderstanding didn't even cross Janus' mind, "I appreciate the necklace and the invitation to your ring and everything really. But, I just wanted to give you a gift, unrelated to all.. that…" he felt like he was fumbling here, unsure how to explain it.

Lunar relaxed a degree, "In that case, appreciate it."

"You don't even know what it is yet." Janus smiled.

Lunar's eyes squinted in a teasing way, "I have a hunch I'll appreciate it regardless."

Janus sat, his legs folded under himself, and handed the box to Lunar. "They're honey glazed apple fritters, I got them from a bakery," he explained, “So they’re handmade but not by me.” He was over explaining this, wasn’t he? He did that when he was nervous.

He opened the box and stared down at the desserts, "They allowed a child to take something glazed in honey?"

Janus blinked, not sure what that meant until, "Oh, is it true that honey's like alcohol to fae?" Janus was sure it was judging by Lunar's reaction but he wanted clarification anyway.

"Yes, is it not for humans?"

Janus shook his head, "No, it just tastes good to us."

"Fascinating." Lunar said it like he was truly fascinated, he was like that for plenty of human things that he learned about, at least when he wasn't being frustrated by them, "I was right," the fae said, "I do appreciate this."

"I'm glad." the human replied.

[imma-potatoo]

OooO! For the requests, u!Patton mini fic with sympathetic Intruloceit and abusive Logicality, Patton is physically and mentally abusive to Logan, and he shows up to the dark side of the mindscape bleeding from the head and on the verge (ha) of passing out, Janus mends him (gets romantic when he wakes up) and Remus goes to bust some asses xD

(as you wish~)

The logical side as his eyes locked to the floor. His gaze fixed on the rusty nails pinning the floor boards down

"Honestly Logan! For being the logical side, you're just so dumb!"

"I know." there was a board to the left of his foot, it has a small spec of red paint. It was kind of a rusty colour if you looked closely at it, and it was flaky. Crusting over the wood rings

"Did you seriously think that Thomas would ever want to listen to you? I mean, what in the nation was that?"

"I don't know, I'm sorry." The paint smelled too, it had a strong iron scent that he could smell from where he was standing. The pigment was soaked into the wood-

"Are you even listening to me? Or are you just that big of a hypocrite?"

"I kno- wait!" Logan snapped his head up, being met with the two furious eyes of his boyfriend

Patton took a hissing breath as he stormed up to the indigo side, "You idiot!! You never ever listen to me! If you ever loved me you would do what I say!"

Logan backed up as Patton stepped closer. Logan could only choke in fear as Patton screamed in his face, their bedroom walls seeming to shake.

"P-Patton w-wait pl-ease" Logan choked on his tears as he hit the bedroom wall. Patton growling in his face

Even though Patton was the shorter one in the relationship, he was stronger, and certainly more intimidating.

Patton looked up into Logan's eyes, a small smile pulling at his lips, "for someone emotionless, you sure are expressive" he cupped the side of Logan's face, "did you lie?"

The shorter man combed back the pin straight hair of the logical side, ignoring the other side's trembling. "You know how I feel about liars, don't you sugar pie?"

Logan's vocal chords betrayed their owner, only small croaks and choked off noises escaping from his lips. Patton caught the hair at his nape, "Answer me"

Logan tried. But he couldn't. His vocals only squeaking in the protest as more tears fell down his cheeks

Patton's expression turned into a sneer. Tightening his grip, "I'm giving you one more chance Logan." his eyes were cold, drained of the emotion and love that they normally held. His skin felt burning. The inferno burning him from the inside out.

No answer could leave the side's lips.

Patton threw the side to the floor, his glasses falling off with the impact and the rusty nail hit his temple. Crimson liquid leaked from the cut. A sudden lightheadedness filled the side's skull, the room starting to spin, and the lights dug knifes into his head

Patton placed his foot on the others back, shoving him to the ground with a crack of Logan's spine. The cyan side kept pushing down as the floor creaked, "I'll answer since you seem too dumb to figure it out." he pushed harder on the side's ribs, "I. Hate. Liars. Deceit is lucky that I haven't dealt with him yet" cold eyes dug into his soul.

"Never ignore me ever again, are we clear?"

Logan nodded and his partner left the room

Logan layed on the floor for what seemed like hours, his breath raced and his head pounded as the ticking of the nearby clock seemed to work to drive him into insanity.

The blue side pushed himself upward, stabling himself in the wall. His limbs felt like lead as he stumbled out of the room

Truth be told, Logan had no clue where he was going. All he knew is that he needed to get help. So he kept walking

It felt like hours, the sickening feeling clinging to his gut as his head filled with cotton, he barely even recognized where he was anymore. It was dark, he knew that. And it smelled strangely like earl gray tea and copper. The tea was the much stronger scent though. It filled the room like someone had sprayed the scent, and old books lined the shelfs. Leaving the room with this warm atmosphere that was lacking everywhere else, even in his own room-

"Logan?"

The logical side looked up, everything was slightly blurry from his missing glasses, but he could make out scales and a black capelet.

Blood flowed down the side's skull, "H-help-" Logan collapsed into unconsciousness.

---

"-mus! We don't even know what happened to him! You cannot just go hit everyone over the head!"

"Well why not! Its guilty until proven innocent!"

There was a slight pause, "other way darling."

"hmm? Nah! I'm right! You're wrong!"

A sigh was heard, Logan could feel someone combing threw his hair, although it was a lot softer and nicer then how Patton did it. "Remus, darling, love of my life. How can I say this? NO!"

Logan cracked open his eyes, his head was covered in thick bandages and he was rested in Janus' lap. Remus bouncing on the other side of Janus.

"Darling, we don't want to wake up Logan."

"Do you think that when Logan wakes up he'll tell us who we have to kick? I hope so! No one should ever hurt someone like that, I wouldn't even do that! And I do a lot of super gory things! Like!" a gasp sounded from the green side, "Have I shown you Jeffrey yet?!"

Janus chuckled, "I don't think so. Why don't you go grab him?"

Logan opened his eyes fully to meet Janus' when Remus ran to the other room. He wasn't expecting to see a fond smile upon the yellow side's lips.

Janus didn't have his hat, curly fry like curls cascading down his forehead, but the rest of his attire was in place, "Good morning, my amazing logic. How are you feeling my dear?"

Logan opened his mouth, but sputtered from the dryness of his thoat. Janus handed him a glass of water, aiding him in holding the glass

Logan drew a calm breath, panting for oxygen, "Th-thank you"

The yellow side smiled, "I have nothing to accept. I simply gave you a simple human courtesy."

Logan blinked, mouth gapping as Janus ran his ungloved finger tips through his hair. Logan slumped against his chest, "Why did you help me?" tears clogged his thoat

Janus blinked, confusion filling his features, "because it was the right thing to do." Janus traced the swell of his back, avoiding the bandages that covered his skin as the time ticked away, "Logan?"

"Yes?"

"who hurt you?"

Silence spread throughout the room, specks thought flickered across the logical side's eyes. Lose flecks of hair covering his eyes as tears stained his face.

"I-I don't want him to hurt you"

A calm smile spread across the deceitful side's face, "He couldn't if he tried."

"JAN!! JANNNN!! SNAKEY!!" Remus burst through the door, a simple looking terrarium in his hands, "Look!" Remus paused the very second he locked gaze with Logan, a gasp filled the room as the green side rushed to place the terrarium on the scratched coffee table

"Lo! Lo-Lo! How ya feeling? Who do I have to hit? No one should hurt you like that!"

Blurry eyes flickered back and forth to the two sides. Both had this tint of protectiveness in their eyes, the tint covered their eyes like a coating of some sort. It was darker, but not the kind of look that was located in Patton's eyes.

"Patton," his voice was hushed, barely audible to the other sides.

Remus grinned, pressing a light kiss to his and Janus' forehead, "I love both of you!" The green side snatched his morning star from the dining room table, slamming the front door shut behind him.

Blush covered the blue side's face, his brain lagging to catch up. "W-what?"

Janus looked down at the taller man, "Rem just gets ahead of himself sometimes, we'll talk about it when he gets back" a soft grin spread on his face, "Want to watch BigHero6 dear?"

Surprise coated Logan's features for a millisecond, hesitantly nodding to the offer. Logan watched Janus search for the remote, his attention being brought to the terrarium on the table

"Jeffrey?"

"he names all his pets Jeffrey."

[sablesides-ask-blog]

Oooo!! Can You Do “If you think this’ll work…I trust you, [Caretaker].” With Prinxiety?

Virgil was. . . Jumpy, about most things.

Whether it was sudden noises or the thought of public speaking, it wasnt very difficult to set him off.

But it was certainly a concerning sight when something did garner a reaction.

A sight that Roman had seen one to many times by that point.

And Roman wasnt one to dabble in the things he'd seen from disney villains as a child, but he had heard hypnosis could work wonders.

And at that point, he was willing to do whatever it took to fix his dearest princess.

So he spent hours pouring over books and articles and tutorials on safe hypnosis practices, some more. . . Interesting. . . Than others, but not quite what he wanted for himself or Virgil at that point.

He put far more time into these studies than he ever had for school, as his best friend Logan noted when Roman came over to ask he and his husband Janus for help in practicing.

Janus himself was a professional in the craft of hypnotism, and even he was impressed with how quickly Roman had picked it up.

"If I didnt know any better I'd say you had some kind of magic going on," Janus said, smirking as he watched Roman bring Logan out of his enraptured state.

"Well if it's good enough to help Virgil, I'm happy with it," Roman repsonded.

"I think it just might be," Janus replied.

And with that Roman made his way home, only to find his beloved husband curled up on the couch with a pillow pressed between his knees and his forehead, clawing at his arms like poison ivy.

"Virgil!-" Roman quickly discarded the items he was holding and rushed to his husband's side.

"Virgil my darling what happened? Can you hear me princess?" Roman said, pressing his thumb firmly against Virgil's palm. Virgil let out a whine and a squeak before flinging himself desperately into Roman's arms. His face was riddled with mascara and eyeshadow, his own features barely discernable.

"Oh nonono princess it's alright, shhh, no need to cry, I have something that can help you. . ." Roman muttered, swaying from side to side in an effort to lull his husband back into a more relaxed state.

"Y-you do?" Virgil squeaked out, his voice sounded hoarse and strained, Roman felt a twinge of guilt that he hadnt been there to stop the attack at its beginning.

"Mhm, been practicing for months, just for you," Roman continued as he walked to his and Virgil's bedroom.

"What is it?" Virgil said, straightening up and tilting his head as Roman placed him at the edge of the bed.

"Hypnosis," Roman said, pulling out a silver butterfly necklace.

"Hypnosis?. . ." Virgil sounded unsure.

"I've done research, I can give you an out, you dont have to go through with this if it makes you uncomfortable ok princess?" Roman said.

"If you think itll work. . . I trust you, Roman," Virgil replied.

"Alright princess, now I want you to watch this as closely as possible," Roman said as he let the butterfly pendant swing loose in front of Virgil's face.

Roman could feel a slight stitch in his chest as he watched Virgil's eyes glaze over, almost as if he were falling asleep.

"Now Virgil, if at any point you do not wish to continue, blink twice and I'll move you back out of sub conciousness," Roman said, Virgil nodded, a slight smile crossing his lips.

Roman stood for a few moments, trying to think of things he might need to reprogram for Virgil.

"Now Virgil, when you wake up, if you hear motorcycles, all you will be reminded of is a sweet summer breeze on the beach, can you picture that? Sand between your toes, ice cream in your hand?" Roman would have been more apprehensive about such descriptively intense commands, but Virgil didnt go out, nor could he drive in the first place, so there were few risks he could think of with the instructions.

Virgil nodded, flexing his hands slightly like claws.

Roman went through a few more commands, trying his best to replace as many of the things he knew set Virgil off as he could.

And they had worked, perfectly, and Roman couldnt have been happier with how much better Virgil seemed to be doing now.

----------------------------------------------

Tag list:

@nova-xx

@softestpatton

@meowthefluffy

@a-deceit-salad

@nerosdayinhell

@soupforfree

@willowaudreykeyes

@frawkeyes

@the-sad-strawberry

@sneaky-slytherin

@romano-hottopic

@virgiliciousspeaks

[unsympathetic-teach]

I have no clue if this blog is still active, so forgive me if it's not

But toxic loceit tho...

When they started dating, everything was going fine and janus (who i head canon as VERY attention starved, i mean.. His reaction when he got listened to? Yeah) is head over heels with the very small amount of attention that logan is giving him

But then a few mouths later, the attention stops, and janus tries to ask logan about it, only for logan to yell that janus is lying to him, that how can he ever believe anything he says, that he's gaslighting and manipulating him

So janus starts to get quieter about his problems because logan didn't care, but then logan gets upset over janus not telling him when he's upset

But when janus tells him, he gets told that he's lying and manipulating logan

Leaving Janus stuck in an endless loop

~🌻 (do you already have a sunflower anon? If you do, ~🐍)

(me being a janus kinnie and just getting out of a toxic relationship projecting? Maybe.. Maybe not-)

hi! Yes this blog is still active, I just haven't really been into SaSi lately.

and oooh yes I love that!! Very bad for Janus but good u!Logan characterization. Logan being just..like angered very easily is so good.

[tss-storytime-summaries]

44

Expected Rating: Teen / Possibly Mature

Warnings: violence (mentioned), death (mentioned), child abuse (discussed/mentioned), child neglect, swearing, possible homophobia, blackmailing, loss of a parent

Characters: Logan, Patton, Remus, Roman, Janus, Emile, Ocs possibly: Virgil, Remy, Thomas

Romantic Relationships: potential romantic loceit. veeery low chance for romantic moxiety

Summary: Janus life comes to a screeching halt when he suddenly finds himself the owner of half of his childhood house after the death of his only sibling. A place he never thought he would see again. Not after the fateful fight with his parents.

With unpleasant memories swirling in the air Janus was more than happy to hand the keys over to the first reasonable buyer. But his life stopped falling into place since his sister death and far too soon Janus finds himself living in the manor again, with two nephews running amok in the yard.

After months of fighting for custody, money, and whatever obstacles the kids biological father decided to throw Janus' way, the man believes there is little left in this world that could throw him and his kids off balance anymore.

That is until the twins introduced him to an imaginary friend who turned out to be a little more real than Janus had assumed.

[lukashomeros]

Adimos Tapes: Chapter 1

Present - Virgil

7 years ago, Virgil decides to spend the weekend at a cabin with his boyfriend at the time Patton. When he returns home two days later, he finds his mother brutally murdered and his twin brother Janus missing, but that was 7 years ago. He had all but given up ever seeing his brother again, so Virgil moved on with his life and married his high school sweetheart.

Now his brother is home, and he won't tell anyone what happened. Though one thing is clear, Janus is convinced his captors will return for him.

I'm getting used to using tumblr, so if I need to add any tags please let me know!

Out of all the things Virgil expected of the day, he would have never guessed this. Not in a million years. He couldn’t comprehend the words the officers in front of him said and barely registered the comforting hand of his husband on his shoulder. At some point, he was guided to the living room and sat down.

“Come in,” Patton called after the two officers who followed inside, sitting across from Virgil. “Here, love.” A cool glass of water was placed in his hands and Virgil sipped from it. Questions swarmed his mind, but not a single one made it past his lips as the officers continued.

“We found him a month ago, but he was in intensive care and refused to speak, so it was almost impossible to ID him at the time.” One officer spoke, sitting up straight and maintaining eye contact with Virgil. Meanwhile, the other kept his gaze down but maintained good posture. “He’s still…” The officer pondered an appropriate word, biting his bottom lip. “Scarred, and he won’t speak, but we’re certain it’s him.”

“I want to see him, I have to see him,” Virgil blurted out, gripping the glass tightly with shaking shoulders as he fought back tears. As he fought back images of the video the bastards who took his twin brother sent him. It was no use though, fighting anything. “He must be so scared,” Hot tears spilled down his cheeks while images of his brother flashed in his head. The pure panic as Janus realized it wasn’t Virgil in the kitchen, the thud of his body falling on the hard tile after turning too fast to run away, the scream of the man-

“Virgil, breathe for me, please.” Patton cut through the memories and wrapped his arms around his husband, holding him close as he sobbed. They remained like that for some time, before he managed to calm down.

“How did…did you find the son of a bitch who took him?” Virgil asked softly, still clinging to Patton who kissed his head. The officer’s words made both visibly tense, even Patton who appeared to remain completely calm otherwise.

“No, and I won’t lie to you,” Said officer sighed and leaned forward, head bowed slightly, “the only reason we found Janus is because they allowed us to.”

“What do you mean?”

“The FBI followed a trail of breadcrumbs they left, videos and notes, to a home. At that home, they found a closet full of VHS tapes, costumes, and in one of the front rooms a large box. In that box we found your brother, he had been left for us to find.” His voice betrayed the stoic composure he had been attempting to maintain. What he neglected to tell Virgil was that Janus had been left in a costume of his own, as if on display. A short dress with a mask over his head. He had been assumed dead at first, but after checking for a pulse, the FBI quickly brought in paramedics. Virgil did not need to hear that right now, though. “You need to prepare yourself when you see him, alright?” Virgil nodded, gulping down the rest of the water to try and quell the dryness in his mouth.

The drive towards the hospital was painstakingly slow, and without the background noise of the radio it about drove Virgil insane. For obvious reasons, Patton had refused to allow his already upset husband to drive. Although, despite the gut-wrenching silence, neither spoke nor turned on the radio. They simply resigned to their thoughts for the 30-minute drive, Virgil’s mind drifting off to a better time.

While the twins played Mario Kart together-including Janus’ pet snake, currently hanging on his shoulders-Janus gave his iconic grin and cheer after winning a race, 1st place. A smile that was contagious, even if Virgil barely made 6th place. Life had been so carefree, not a single worry. Their parents accepted that both of them were gay and loved them unconditionally despite the two being quite the handful at times. Virgil’s chest tightened as tears threatened to spill down his cheeks once more. Would Janus ever go back to be the gleeful kid he was before, he doubted it. After all, 7 years in what Virgil could only assume was a literal hell had to have damaged him irreparably.

He unconsciously reached for his husbands’ arm, tugging lightly on his sleeve, lest he delved back into a panic attack. As a result, Patton hummed and held Virgil’s hand, intertwining their fingers while driving with his other. How had Janus changed? The question struck fear in his heart.

When they arrived at the hospital, they still had not shared a single word between them, but their hands remained interlocked. Although, they had to break apart to step out of the car, but only for a moment. They walked together to a secluded wing of the hospital, two police officers standing outside a door. Janus’ room, it had to be. Virgil’s breath caught in his throat as the officers focused on them.

“I’m…I’m here to see my brother.” He said as one officer stepped over to him.

“I’ll need to see ID,” Virgil nodded and reached with shaky hands for his wallet in his back pocket. Patton mirrored him, pulling out his own ID. The guard examined both, before speaking again, “Only family is allowed inside for now, Doctor’s orders.” He led Virgil inside the room, leaving Patton waiting outside with a solemn expression and arms held behind his back.

“Janus?” Virgil softly called out to his twin who stared blankly up at the ceiling. As the words left his mouth though, Janus’ expression twisted to pain for a split second before becoming neutral.

“Janus, this is your brother Virgil,” A doctor who had been sitting next to him, clipboard in hand, stood and slowly walked over to Virgil. “I’m Dr. Picani, a psychologist here.” Virgil vaguely recognized the handheld out for him, which he shook without sparing the doctor a glance. Rather than acknowledge Dr. Picani, Virgil looked his brother over. Before Janus had been pudgy, not fat, but he had weight on him, whereas the Janus in front of him had sunken in cheeks, thin and bony arms, and, as much as Virgil wanted to deny it, he assumed his legs were in the same condition despite the hospital blanket covering them. The most damning though was the left side of his face, multiple faint scars most likely from cuts. They stayed strictly on the left side where the only difference between the twins lay. His eyes, specifically, Janus’ once-vibrant golden colored eye, now dimmed with the horrors he endured.

Something else Virgil noted.

“Look, at me, Janus, please,” Virgil’s voice cracked. In spite of the pleading in Virgil’s voice, Janus kept his gaze down, staring at his lap albeit shifting uncomfortably under his stare. So as to prevent either from becoming too upset or setting Janus off, Picani in a hushed whisper scolded him.

“Do not get angry with him,” He held his wrist tightly, “The men who held him beat him into submission. Avoiding eye contact is the least of his worries, right now.” With that, Virgil completely deflated.

“Please, just say something to me, Janus. Let me hear your voice again”

“I’m sorry, I don’t know what you want me to say.” Virgil about melted at his voice, it was barely audible, almost as if Janus was afraid. No terrified, he noted as Janus began rubbing the side of his leg, which was almost a bit of a relief. It was a nervous tick that Janus had before he had been taken, something those monsters neglected to take from him. Although, as soon as Virgil took notice the action ceased immediately and Janus began opening and closing his mouth attempting to speak, but nothing came out. Dr. Picani went to his side in a slow, but clear stride.

“It’s alright, Janus, you can say whatever you want,” He gently held his hand and the two shared a silent moment before Janus spoke again.

“What…I’m…I’m not sure,” Janus laughed dryly, and tears clung to his eyes while his body began to tremble. “Not sure what you want me to say…” He repeated that every so often and each time more heartbreaking than the last, Virgil couldn’t take it. He stepped closer to the bed and in a stern voice, demanded.

“Who took you?”

“Who took me, who took me,” Janus’ eyes glazed over, “the masters, they’re coming to get me right?” He gripped the doctor’s arm and met his gaze again, panic setting in his face. “They have to come to get me, I know I was bad, but they wouldn’t abandon me…” He mouthed the words ‘they love me,’ and Virgil’s stomach twisted.

“Excuse me,” He rushed to the bathroom in the hospital room, hunching over the toilet and proceeded to throw up his breakfast, not noticing a reassuring hand on his back.

“You have to be strong for him, I know this is hard, but you cannot lose it in front of Janus.” Dr. Picani said, sitting on the floor next to him and rubbing circles on his back as Virgil continued to dry heave. How could Virgil remain calm? His brother’s spirit was completely crushed, this wasn’t the sarcastic, witty twin he grew up with. This was a pathetic, beaten boy who had fallen for his captors.

“He’s not Janus, what could they…” The question died on his lips. What could they have done to shatter him like this?

“He is Janus and he needs you now more than ever,” Picani shifted to stand and pulled his hand away, “he spent 7 years under their control, he needs understanding and reassurance to make a full recovery.” Virgil stood on his shaky legs and wiped his mouth. “If you truly cannot take him in then- “

“No, there’s no one else who can take him in, but you’re right, Dr.” Virgil straightened himself up. “I have to be strong for him.”

[acescreations]

Fusion Sides Part 1. What They Have

[Inspired by the Fusion Sides made by @novaedream. I wrote this a while ago, but I figured this would be a good opportunity to modify it slightly. Also I know I'm bad at titles but if you got a better idea then I'm all ears.]

Summary: Logan gets jealous of the Royality fusion, and Deceit takes advantage of the situation and Logan's feelings to trap Logan in an unstable fusion. (My headcanon on how the Loceit fusion came to be, along with other heacanons about the fusion.)

Characters: Logan Sanders, Deceit Sanders, Roman Sanders [mentioned], Patton Sanders [mentioned], Virgil Sanders

Ships: Royality

Warnings: Manipulative Deceit, Logan angst, (I don’t know how to tag these sorts of things help)

Word Count: 901

I can’t believe it.

They fused again.

Why do they always fuse?

They’re completely chaotic, and even when they try to help, they end up doing more harm than good.

When will they just realize that they’re better off apart?

And why am I so jealous?

I closed the door to my room with a sigh, concluding that nobody noticed me leaving. I walked to the desk by my wall, but paused as I placed my hand on the chair.

“Aw, why the long face, Lo?” A familiar voice began speaking behind me.

“What do you want, Deceit?” I said coldly, turning to face the other Side with an expression to match my tone.

“I just want to talk to you. No need to get so defensive.”

I sighed as I sat down at my desk chair, turning it to face the snake-faced trait. I knew Deceit was lying, but I did want to talk to somebody, and at this point my standards were low. “Roman and Patton keep fusing, and I don’t understand why. They should realize that they’re out of control every time they’re together. They always do more harm than good. It’s not worth it, or at least it shouldn’t be.”

“Oh Lo, I understand completely,” Deceit said before walking over to lean on the desk beside me, a calm smoothness in his step. “And don’t you agree that it’s wrong of them to keep fusing around all of us, despite knowing that none of us have ever fused?”

I nodded. That was actually something I had thought of a lot. I wasn’t surprised with Roman, but I at least expected Patton to be more sensitive about how the others might feel about seeing Royality when everyone else was just… themself. A single person. I never said anything about this, or any of my other thoughts about them together. I knew they wouldn’t want to hear it, so what’s the point?

“Logan, you really do deserve to have what they have.” Deceit leaned down to come face-to-face with me. I looked at him, beginning to shed my doubts about Deceit. “Really, you think so?”

“Of course, my dear.” Deceit pulled me up from my chair, a small smile forming on his lips. “We both do. After all, why should those two get all the fun?”

I barely noticed being pulled to Deceit, both of us moving into position for a slow waltz. “Do you really think that’s possible?”

“Of course.” Deceit began leading me in a small waltz within the room. “We can fuse too, can’t we? So why shouldn’t we be able to have their kind of relationship? There’s nothing stopping us.”

I nodded. “Yes, of course. You’re right, we can have that.” I watched Deceit nod, the smile on his face growing, and then our forms merged together. I closed my eyes, letting our forms combine. Then, I felt myself change, and I realized there wasn’t me. There was us.

And it felt so wrong.

We opened our eyes, which was immediately wrong. Royality only has two eyes, so why do we still have both of ours? Why can we feel eyes below our glasses? Why are there four? Out of our left eye we saw our room, except it was no longer our room. It looked strange, warped. Scales were covering parts of the walls, and snakes were surrounding us on the floor. Through our right eye, however, we could only see lines upon lines of binary code.

The next thing we noticed, was that we had two mouths. That’s not right either. Royality only has one. When we opened our mouth, it was not the feeling we were expecting, of our lower jaw moving downwards. Instead, our head moved up. We quickly figured out that only our lower mouth could open and close.

And our tongue.

It was a power cord, we could feel it at the tip of our tongue.

Everything was wrong.

Our body was nothing like Royality. Royality looked like an ordinary human unless they wanted to look different. But we were completely wrong from the start, and we couldn’t understand what went wrong. Deceit, what happened? This isn’t right. We tried to speak, but we didn’t hear out voice. All we heard was beeping, sounding like it was coming through static.

01000100 01100101 01100011 01100101 01101001 01110100 00101100 00100000 01110111 01101000 01100001 01110100 00100000 01101000 01100001 01110000 01110000 01100101 01101110 01100101 01100100 00111111 00100000 01010100 01101000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01101001 01110011 01101110 00100111 01110100 00100000 01110010 01101001 01100111 01101000 01110100 00101110

We then realized that nobody would be able to understand us if we could only speak in code. Then we decided we wanted to be myself again. We tried pulling ourselves apart, the room going dark. We closed my eyes as I waited to fall apart, but when I opened them again, we were still ourselves.

I was trapped.

We heard a knock at our door, and turned to face it in alarm as it was opened.

“Logan?” Virgil’s cautious voice came through the door. We saw his concern at the change in the room turn into horror when he laid eyes on us.

“I’m afraid there isn’t any Logan anymore,” a quiet, raspy voice came out of the mouth we knew was in our throat, although the words weren’t Logan’s. “From now on, you may call us Loceit.”

[mother-snake]

when you wish upon a star

( have i started a new series because i have an idea i need to get down? of couse my disfunctional self has! happy halloween guys and sorry for the lack of content) i have decided to make god angst a series. and this is the beginning- enjoy

next: n/a

tags: @idkanameatall @girl-with-many-fandoms @imma-potatoo warnings: injury mention, broken bone mention, U!light sides, U! dark sides words: 1036

-imperfectly perfect-

There were many things that lead up to the moment for Janus. it was the past that he felt he needed to escape from.

From the lies he had told that destroyed the friendships and familial bonds between him and everyone else. the fact that the dark sides still bore into him on his every mistake, old or new. the bruises that littered his skin would never hurt as much as his heart. The one-time broken leg did, but barely.

Then there were the light sides. God knows that roman and… Virgil hated his guts. Remus could barely stand to be in a room with him. Patton, as hard as he tried to get over the fact Janus seemed to lie in his sentences still told him off. he was wearing down, and he knew it wouldn’t be long until something happened. He wasn’t sure what it was… but none the less, it was coming.

Right now, all the dark sides were asleep. he knew this because he had managed to sneak over to the light sides. There was one room he was specifically aiming for. the library.

Books upon books he could get lost in. but that wasn’t the only reason he was going there. a certain side would be waiting there. Logan had been meeting him there every Saturday night for weeks. It seemed to be the only time he seemed to like of the entire week. He always found himself smiling when Logan was around. he did still feel guilty for hurting him back when he had tried to show Patton that he was making this worse by his short answers.

Logan had been quick to dismiss his apology. Saying that he understood that Janus was desperate to leave the darks. he had heard tales of the darks from the lights… oh if only he knew that half of it…

Anyways. Janus was slowly making his way past doors. Purple, red, green, and blue. there at the end of the hall were grand wooden doors. The library was one of the few places that the other sides seemed to not go as much. meaning privacy was mainly always there.

Occasionally they had to hide Janus from a side who seemed to waltz in, not even keeping quiet. That had angered the both of them every time.

He felt himself smile ever so slightly as he pushed open a door, wincing as a bruise on his arm was irritated by the motion. the door gave a small noise as it shut behind him. he hoped it wouldn’t wake anyone up.

He creeped his way over to the back where Logan would be sitting. There was a simple window seat and a few beanbags from when they were years younger. Blankets would be piled up neatly in a corner. a perfect little hide away from all their issues.

He of course knew why Logan was there. he had been coming here longer than himself. The lights had been slowly tearing away at his confidence. And now he barely even made an effort to be heard. in many ways Janus felt guilty for doing what he did that day, but they both seemed to know if it didn’t happen thing would have gotten very much so, out of hand.

His small smile turned into a grin as he saw Logan sitting on top of a bright pink bean bag. A book in hand and a blanket draped over. “good evening Logan,” Janus said, beaming at Logan. “ah! Janus, are you okay?” Logan asked, “they didn’t hurt you too bad, right?” Logan asked as he shot out of the bean bag and giving him a quick once over. “just a few bruises today, I assure you. I'm all right,” he looped his arms around Logan and pulled him into a hug. Logan was quick to return it. pulling Janus in tightly.

They stood like that for a good five minutes. A warmth they only got from one another poured into their hearts. Melting into the touch.

Neither wanted to let go, but they knew it would be best to sit down. Thus, Logan was the first to let go, but he kept hold of Janus’s hand as he pulled back and dragged him over to where the bean bags sat.

They spent the hours of the night talking, reading and staring out of the window. stars in the sky shined as brightly as they felt sitting next to one another. Seemingly smiling down on the both of them. as the night pulled on, they found themselves curled up next to one another with a blanket draped over themselves. Janus hand his head in logans lap. A hand running through his hair as they sat for the first time in a while… in silence. But it wasn’t like it had been at the very beginning. This one was peaceful. Content.

Logan looked down at Janus with a warm smile. The snake in his lap almost asleep. everything was perfect. “hey, Janus?” he asked. Janus hummed in response. “do you ever think that ducking out could work?” he asked.

Janus… had been startled by this question. Sitting up and looking at Logan with a concerned gaze. “what…. What do you mean?” he asked. “well- this. This peacefulness without everyone on our backs, without worry that you will be hurt! Without worry that I won’t end up shutting down,” he said, “to live without worry of the future,” he muttered.

Janus stared at him. his gaze was soft, understanding. “how would we do it?” Janus muttered, “we could find somewhere to hide, but it would only be a matter of time before they would find us,” he said looking at Logan. “well… we could start meeting up on Wednesday!” Logan said excitedly, “we could plan then. And when we feel enough is enough, we do something about it,” he nodded firmly at Janus. “yeah… that sounds perfect,” Janus muttered as he nuzzled his head into the crook of Janus’s neck.

They looked at each other with eyes filled with contentless. as they leaned in, lips planting on each other’s lips.

They wouldn’t have changed a thing. they were imperfectly perfect.