#aka my mom nobody else did

[voguesriot]

SUNBURN ✹ luke castellan

( summary ) a social media au about chb’s fav couple (& their fav shitstirrer, aka percy jackson)

( pairing ) luke castellan x fem aphrodite cabin-coded!reader & small bits of baby percabeth

( notes ) first post ahhh!!! this was so fun to make

♫ Ant Pile by Dominic Fike

♡ liked by wisegirll , silenabeauregard , and others

yourusername my bf is hot but dominic fike if u wanna hmu i can ditch him it’s no biggie 😁🫶

lukecastellan EXCUSE ME

lukecastellan you already completed your rite of passage why do you need to break my heart 😔💔

yourusername want me to kiss that bruised ego better?

lukecastellan sigh… i guess…

seaweedbrain BOOO TOMATO TOMATO BOOOOO

seaweedbrain get his ass off my screen 🤣🤣

lukecastellan sparring arena. you and me. now.

groverunderwood bros rlly beefing with a 13 yr old

seaweedbrain the typa guy to tell me to kms bcs i voted him out in roblox total drama island

clarisselarue this would’ve been so much better without the second slide

yourusername no more like content from here on out 🙅‍♀️

lukecastellan wtf???

yourusername sorry babe i don’t argue with girls who have big brown eyes, whatever she wants she’s gonna get

silenabeauregard YOU LOOK SO CUTESY

yourusername I LOVE U 🥹❤️‍🩹

chrisrodriguez lukecastellan bro ik nobody else here fw you, but i’ll always fw you 💗

lukecastellan you’re a real one bro 👊

aphroditecamper1 u guys are so cute ☹️

♫ Babydoll by Dominic Fike

♡ liked by cbeckendorf , connorstroll , and others

lukecastellan yeah your girl might have a general grasp on battle strategies or whatever but can she bring an oddly unsettling vibe and a cute smile to the function? DIDNT THINK SO ‼️‼️‼️

seaweedbrain put a shirt on man nobody wants to be seeing all that trust 🙏

lukecastellan i wonder if your dad would’ve stayed if you weren’t such a hater

seaweedbrain i wonder if your dad wouldn’t have become the ten dollar founding father if you mom swallowed

yourusername woah…

seaweedbrain when he goes low i go LOWER

wisegirll too far percy

seaweedbrain sorry ma’am

clarisselarue this would’ve been so much better without the second slide

lukecastellan it’s my account???

clarisselarue i stand by what i said.

chrisrodriguez yk i can bring an oddly unsettling vibe too and my ma said my smiles pretty cute so…

yourusername yeah you bring such a crazy vibe!!

chrisrodriguez now that’s just rude

yourusername tried to be a homewrecker but you got wrecked instead 🤷‍♀️

wisegirll yourusername your lashes look so good!!!!

yourusername MY BABY THANK U I LOVE U UR MY FAV PERSON EVER

clarisselarue WTF???

silenabeauregard WTF?????

seaweedbrain WTF????

lukecastellan i’m used to this by now 😔💔🥀

♫ Woman Screaming #2 by Anton Hughes

♡ liked by wisegirll , racheledare , and others

seaweedbrain does he just not own a shirt… COVER YOUR BOOBS SIR PLEASE THERE ARE CHILDREN

lukecastellan why are you taking pics of us having a nap… fan behaviour icl

seaweedbrain i needed proof to file a police report against you for theft

lukecastellan how did you know??

seaweedbrain i was talking ab stealing my innocence but what were you thinking…

yourusername wait perce can you send me the second pic it’s so cute

yourusername send the first one too actually please

seaweedbrain pick yourself up you’re stronger than this what happened to women who stand on business 😔

yourusername i was standing!!! but then my feet hurt and he picked me up :)

seaweedbrain sigh

chrisrodriguez bros looking fine oh my gods

lukecastellan don’t matter if i’ve got a world of haters, i got you by my side

yourusername i’m just gonna leave…

clarisselarue yourusername just saying i’d never pull that shit

lukecastellan ok joke over ha ha funny

wisegirll percy this is a bit stalkerish 😭

seaweedbrain i’m sorry you’re right

this post has been deleted.

[t1oui]

going to school and being friends with percy jackson would be REALLY WEIRD so let's discuss it rq

he gets dropped off every day in his stepfather's car, which inexplicably has hoof prints on the hood?

the panic attacks... there's a lot of them, and nobody can even tell what's triggering them at this point

the old counselor disappears about a week into his first year at AHS (here's some cotg lore for yall) and is replaced by a weird lady who finds a way to bring percy up to every. single. student. who visits her office.

randomly disappears multiple times throughout the year

very very sea green eyes and a gray streak in his hair

once got out of the pool after swim practice and was completely dry (he insists it was a trick of the light)

the blue food obsession ofc

talks about his girlfriend annabeth all the time... even his friends are convinced it's a "my canadian girlfriend" situation bc he never calls her. he doesn't even have a PHONE

always carries around a pen in his pocket and even though it's just a shitty old ballpoint, NOBODY IS ALLOWED TO TOUCH IT. also he never uses it. ever.

every teacher has sent an email with their concerns about him to the counselor and when that doesn't work to his parents. the responses are always very awkward and vague

talks about his bio dad a lot... never explicitly negative but bro clearly has daddy issues lol

will sometimes randomly mention camp/war/gods and then brush it off like it never happened

absolutely vibrated in his seat the entirety of the greek mythology unit... told the teacher "a demigod named perseus fought ares once" and the teacher just assumes he means the og (aka the one he's named after)

that one upbeat popular guy everybody knows absolutely nothing about, his friends included

they probably have a spreadsheet with all the info they actually DO know about him

finds a way to brag about his mom in every conversation no matter how irrelevant... his friends are used to it atp

everyone's so used to seeing him smiling and laughing that when, say, he catches a younger kid being bullied, it's actually terrifying to see how angry he gets. everybody in that hallway gets chills

there's something off about him and nobody can tell what. that's just how he is

sometimes weird people in weird outfits are hanging around the school and they're ALWAYS looking for him.

every time someone asks what college he's going to he gives a different answer or straight up avoids answering so nobody actually knows

(if he says a school and someone is like "omg me too" he changes his answer right then and there lol... he's like "oh nvm i forgot i'm actually going here my bad" and the person is so confused)

nobody ever sees him working on college applications but he complains about having to do them all the time... bro is like "yeah i had to go through a sewer system but at least my girlfriend and my best friend were there" and his friends are like yo HUH

never explains anything he says

presentation night presentation = all the shittiest things my family has done and he's laughing about it but wdym your aunt kidnapped you and gave you amnesia???

sometimes he's getting fed up with a teacher or another student and a pipe randomly bursts in the school. like it's weird how often his anger ends in a plumber being called when he's nowhere near the problem

where everyone else is excited to watch a movie and chill in class, percy complains through the entirety of hercules - not just "oh this movie sucks", more like "god hercules is such a dick, idk why they made him chill in this movie"

the weirdest part is how, when percy complains about zeus being a good dad in the movie, it starts thundering outside

nobody can keep track of how many schools he's been to at this point... there's a whole section of the spreadsheet for this

when percy's friends finally meet annabeth they are SHOOK bc they truly did not think this girl was real

alright i can't think of anything else but if i DO i will add on later

[misc-obeyme]

I like to think that lilith's Angel DNA was still active or strong enough to last generations after generations. So if her Angel DNA got more thinner and thinner after generations, it would make sense for Mc to gain power AFTER forming some sort of pacts with the brothers.

This makes me wonder if Mc is the "special one" in her lineage to awaken this sort of power within themselves. If Mc had siblings, wouldn't that mean that Mc's siblings could also gain/awaken their power, too? Since they all share lilith's bloodline. Which could make some things very interesting.

I completely agree with you that Michael (or god) have their eyes on Mc considering how powerful they are (regardless of whether they're human or Nephilim). Maybe that's why Raphael was sent to the Devildom to keep one eye on Mc. Both realms are currently not at war, but i'm sure neither of them want that powerful being, aka Mc to become the others side weapon if something were to escalate. Maybe this is why Solomon once asked Mc to side with humanity instead. (I can't remember what lessons it was in NB).

Either that or they would try to get "ride of" Mc if they become too powerful and dangerous. and once more, according to biblical lore states that ridding the Earth of these Nephilim was one of God's purposes for flooding the Earth in Noah's time. So they have done it before.

Also, off topic but; You used to watch Supernatural?! Omfg, this brings back memories 😭

-Angsty Anon.

Oh dearest angsty anon. I did indeed watch Supernatural. I started watching while season 5 was airing. For many years, I was obsessed. Though it got to the point that I just watched out of habit because by the time I had invested in twelve or so seasons, I was like I'm gonna see this thing to the end.

Which is funny because I still haven't watched the end. One day, I will watch the last half of season 15. Who knows when it will be, but one day I'll do it. I also rewatched the first 8 seasons, but it's been a while.

Anyway, I think you can go with any of the options regarding the angel DNA. The game's canon on this topic is sparse so I really think you can just come up with whatever you want.

I hadn't previously considered the implications of MC's siblings. I suppose that's why I considered most of MC's power to come from their pacts and so on. My own MC has an older sister and I can't believe I never realized that she would also have some of Lilith's DNA. My MC's mom might, too!! Oh man I kinda feel like that has to be the case because it'd be really funny.

Sorry got a little off topic there. Raphael's cover story is that he's there to be the new exchange student, but I think his ulterior motives are to watch both Simeon and MC. And you know likely to report back to Michael about the goings on in the Devildom in a more general sense, too.

Does the Celestial Realm know about MC's heritage? I can't remember. Lucifer was keeping Lilith's resurrection a secret from his brothers, but I'm assuming nobody else knows? Does Simeon?? These details are eluding me.

I'm just wondering if that would matter to the CR, you know? Just another reason to keep track of MC is their angel DNA, right?

I wonder if they'd even be able to "get rid of" MC, even if they tried. It's hard to say since we don't know how powerful Michael or God/Father is. On the one hand, I would think MC's power would be off the charts at this point, but on the other hand well... that's God we're talking about, right? LOL.

Anyway, here's hoping no floods happen just to take out MC. We get enough of that from Lotan being summoned.

[yannig]

One of us has to make it

Okay so @kimkhimhant

I said I had Neil thoughts to share so here is the one I can’t get out of my head right now.

When Neil decides to stay, his reasoning is “One of us has to make it”. Kevin and him can’t both loose to the mafia, and if someone wins it’s clearly not gonna be Neil, so it might as well be Kevin, and he can’t leave until he knows Kevin will be okay.

"One of us has to make it, Mom." It wasn't going to be Neil. It was obvious he was too stupid to survive without his mother if he let himself get into messes like this. But maybe Kevin could do it. Maybe he'd get through this somehow, riding his talent and Andrew's psychotic obsession and Wymack's fierce protection. Maybe he'd get through this season on the Foxes' roster and be safe. He'd recover and he'd be free. Neil couldn't leave until he knew Kevin would be okay. He didn't want to find out from half the world away.

So Neil decides to stay, decides that making sure Kevin gets out is worth putting himself at risk of being found by the mafia he’s been fleeing for the last 8 years. Because one of them has to make it.

And I think that this logic is actually what fuels a lot of the characters in Aftg, and helps understand a lot of what happens afterwards.

A number of characters are trying to protect everyone else from their own worst nightmare.

Because someone has to make it, and if it won’t be themselves, might as well save someone else.

They all have this one thing that almost killed them, either because they couldn’t protect themselves from it, or because they couldn’t have it.

Neil's thing here is of course the mafia, and protecting others from it even though he was running from them for 8 years is what is going to fuel him later, when he agree to go to the Nest to protect Andrew, and when he follows his father’s men in Baltimore to protect the Foxes.

Andrew is pretty much the same, except his thing is bodily autonomy. He might not be able to protect himself against his rapists or abusers, past or present, but nobody will touch anyone under his care. That’s him killing Tilda for Aaron, his deals with everyone (Neil, Kevin, Aaron), protecting Nicky at the bar, getting himself in juvie so Drake won’t get anywhere near Aaron.

Kevin is a bit more complicated because his worst nightmare is loosing his reason to live (aka Exy), so he’s trying to give other people a reason to live. That’s his deal with Andrew (finding him a reason to live), and that’s why he picks Neil in the first place, because he sees him and understand that Exy is the only thing he has left (“You play like you have everything to lose.”)

Nicky’s thing is family, both as the thing he couldn’t protect himself from (his family hating him) and the thing he couldn’t have (a loving family). So he’s both trying to protect Andrew and Aaron from his own shitty family, and trying to give them a good one. That’s why he flies back from Germany when Tilda dies, and that’s why he stays when the twins get into Uni (they are 18 now, they’re independent, he could leave, except Andrew negotiates a scholarship for him, and he couldn’t be asking Nicky to stay any louder), because they might not need protection anymore but they still need love.

I’m not too sure what to make of Aaron. He might be about solitude/abandonment issues, since his deal his to stay at Andrew’s side. Also everything about his mother, from her abandoning both her twins but only coming back Aaron, to Andrew killing her. So he might have something going on about not living Andrew alone ever again, because Aaron knows how much solitude and abandonment can hurt. In which case him killing Drake is even more significant because it’s of course it’s him killing Andrew’s abuser the way Andrew killed Tilda, but it’s also him showing up and not letting Andrew go through this trauma alone the way he did before.

I’m not too sure about the rest of the Foxes, but a few trow-away ideas:

Renee is about getting out of her gang, which she might be doing when getting Jean out of Evermore

Wymack is about second (and nth) chances. He either got a second chance that saved him, or he never did and it almost killed him. Hence the Foxes.

Idk yet about the others, will have to re-read the books with this analysis in mind.

Hypothesis: while the Monsters are still facing their worst nightmares, the Upperclassmen have mostly overcome them already. So for them it might be more a “becoming the person you needed when no one came” case.

Anyway my point isn’t just to point out these parallels, it’s also what they bring to the analysis of how the Foxes behave.

I believe Neil has kinda picked up on this trend. Not fully, not really consciously, but he his the one to put it into words first. And Andrew isn’t exactly subtle about his own version of it.

Problem is: both of them are being incredibly self-sacrificing about it, and it’s a very bad standard to use to judge other characters, which I believe both Neil and part of the fandom is doing.

I think it’s partly why he calls Kevin a coward that much. Because he thinks his worst nightmare is Riko, and that he’s running away from him instead of facing him. Which he would be perfectly justified to do, but it’s not true. Riko is awful, of course he is, and Kevin is terrified of him, of course he is; but Kevin was ready to stay with him forever if that meant being able to play Exy. Kevin’s worst nightmare is loosing Exy, and he’s facing that everyday he’s back on the court trying to relearn how to play, and every time he tries to get Andrew interested in Exy or to train Neil. He’s less self-sacrificing about it, so it’s a bit less obvious, but he’s still dealing with his worst fear everyday and trying to protect others from it. Considering the role the Foxes play as a team of a last-chance place, I'd argue even going to the Foxes as an assistant coach was a way to help others on top of trying to keep himself afloat.

Also explains why Neil sees Aaron as really selfish (I mean he is but). Assuming I’m right about Aaron, his version of this deal is both pretty discrete (especially when he’s being an asshole about it) and might be centered exclusively on Andrew. And also shows better self-preservation skills than Andrew and Neil (as in he isn’t trowing himself directly in front of people who want to kill him).

Might also explain why Nicky gets some level of respect from Neil for coming back for the twins (Neil acknowledges the sacrifice it was to leave Erik and his family) but definitely not as much as Andrew (because part of Nicky’s deal is also good for him, as in trying to be a family with the twins, instead of a pure sacrifice, as in leaving the family he found in Germany).

TL;DR: Not everyone is being self-sacrificing about it, but that doesn’t mean the Foxes aren’t trying to save others from their own worst nightmares. Some of them are just more subtle about it than others.

[coleblackblood]

Fic Masterpost

It was brought to my attention that I don't often post my fics on here, and that might be a good idea.

Honestly never did it before cause I'm lazy forgetful didn't think about it for various reasons, but I also now have enough people who are interested in my fics now that I can justify doing so.

(Read: people in the servers - Hiiiii Rooks/People of the Grove!)

Hope this helps you find stuff to read!

Note: If there's a double asterick on a fic's pairing, that means it's spicy (aka don't read it at work)

Last Updated: 7/20/24

Glenwood (CastleAudios ASMR):

Glenwood Musings - General

The (Sometimes Human) Guide to Werewolf Dating - Seer & Evie

Long Day - Ranger

Running Her Mouth - Seer/Beth

Crossed Paths - Multiple Pairings

Knightly Musings - Knight

Ranger's Secret - Claire/Ranger, Seer/Beth (crack fic)

Keep That Pretty Mouth Shut - Dear/Rose

Testing Some Things Out - Seer/Beth**

Cuddle Jealousy - Seer/Beth, Ranger/Claire, Claire & Seer

Cuddle Jealousy (Light Edition) - Seer/Beth, Ranger/Claire, Claire & Seer

The Trials of Being a Southern Lady Simp - Sugar/Miss Liza

Quenching the Flames - Ranger/Claire

Stay Comfy and Culty - Abigail & OC

Omega - Claire/Ranger

A Debt Repaid - Claire & Valera (Past Claire/Valera)

Glenwood Archive - Keep Out (This Means You) - Multi Pairings

Breathe - Claire/Ranger, Beth/Seer, Knight/Evie, Pack (individual chapters)

Glenwood Shoots Their Shot - Multi Pairings**

5 Times Seer Begged and 1 Time They Didn't Have To (But Did Anyway) - Seer/Beth**

Rest Day - Dear/Abby/Rose

The Gratest Competition - Claire/Ranger (Crack fic)

Something Borrowed - Beth/Seer, Beth & Joanna/Her Mom

Good Enough - Dear/Abby/Rose

Cookies - Ranger/Claire

(B)romance? - Multiple Pairings (Knight/Seer focus)

Rest Day Part 2 - Dear/Abby/Rose**

The Taste of Hunger and Time - Sugar/Miss Liza

Too Serious, Too Quick - Sugar/Miss Liza, Sugar & Celine

Rogue's Blood - Rogue & Multiple Characters

A Chance Meeting - Celine/Lydia/Deviant, Celine/Deviant**

Sugar and Spice - Sugar/Ranger**

Ashwood Grove (Will o' the Wisp Audios):

Life at Ashwood Grove University - Sparks

Electric Sparks - Sparks/Char

Friendly Reminders - Sparks/Eri

Head Empty - Sparks/Eri**

Denim-Clad Goddamn - Monroe/Sugar**

Gotta Make Your Own Fun - Monroe/Sugar

Give Her Something Else to Put Her Lips On (Respectfully) - Grey/Troublemaker

The Omegaverse Fic Nobody Asked For (Version 1) - Omega!Ashton/Alpha!Jackass**

The Omegaverse Fic Nobody Asked For (Version 2) - Alpha!Ashton/Omega!Jackass**

Round Two - Char/Eri/Shae/Sparks**

Starstruck - Char/Sparks

Beastly - Noir/Aries**

Ashwood Grove Explains the Omegaverse - Multiple** (Crack)

Closet Quickie - Alpha!Noir/Omega!Aries**

Willpower - Sunshine/Morgan**

Saving You, Saving Me - Lore/Gorgeous

Far Cry 5:

Far Cry 5 (Soulmates AU) - Deputy/Seeds

Far Cry 5 Ficlets - Multiple

Kinktober**:

Far Cry 5 Drabbles - Kinktober 2022

FC5 Kinktober 2022 (Series - each day a separate fic)

Kinktober 2023 - Glenwood Edition

Kinktober 2023 - Ashwood Edition

[dreamofjoys]

Imagine a pregnancy scare with Malleus ( I will assume that if you are human, you and Malleus’ baby will be born the human way instead of egg).

You/Yuu/MC crying and freaking out bc you’re stuck in a strange world with nothing and you aren’t ready to be a mom yet, and you have to hide it from everyone else too, although Lilia might somehow know. Imagine the sheer dread and panic of telling him! A prince getting a magicless nobody preggers and out of wedlock too!

Somehow I feel that Mal will probably be slightly dissapointed in the end that it wasn’t for real.

— a/n: my poor baby will be going through a heart attack T-T

— cw: pranking, fake pregnancy, fem reader "breaks down", mentions of marriage (lilia setting you up heh)

look.. i dont know where this fake pregnancy idea come from but you were probably feeling goofy and wanted to prank him a bit

the plan was simple, to suddenly act distanced from malleus and then break down when confronting him about it

initially when you act "cold" towards malleus, he thought that he did something wrong that made you angry/sad

he spend a few days in his room thinking hard about what could possibly go wrong before deciding that it was better to just confront to you about it and talk things out

before he could do that, you had already stepped foot into diasomnia, approaching him with "sad and teary eyes"

his eyes widened in shock, immediately teleporting in front of you

warm hands immediately cupping your cheeks, brushing off the tears that were cascading down

he tilts your head up, observing your puffy eyes that were swollen from "crying"

"what's wrong, love?"

you started getting more "agitated" at the question as fresh tears assaults your eyes again

that's when you decided to "confess" about what's "bothering" you

you found out you were "pregnant" a few days ago as you found it weird that you were vomiting every morning

the pregnancy test indicated positive - you even showed him a fake sample of it

you proceeded going on about how you did not belong in this world. you were just a magicless human with no achievements in twisted wonderland. and now you are weighed with the burden of carrying the heir of briar valley?? the both of you aren't even married! what would people think about this? they wouldn't dare to talk and point fingers at malleus, but as for you..... that's a completely different story

he didn't know how to feel about this.. sudden news. only 2 points were stucked inside his head. 1) You are pregnant 2) You guys aren't married! how could he overlook this part??? he should have just proposed to you first instead of asking you to be his girlfriend someone tell him that's not how it works

also...... who would bully you?? screw what the world says, he is the future king of briar valley. he is the law, not some outsiders who only know how to make his wife - aka you - sad

malleus pulls you into a hug, one hand protectively holding the back of your head while the other loops at the back of your waist

to be honest, you didn't know how he would feel about pregnancy (i guess it's also one of the main reason why you wanted to pull this prank)

malleus pulls away again, his green slitted eyes looking at your (e/c) lovingly

"it's okay," his fingers brushing off a stray hair that were stick to your cheek due to the tears. " i will take responsibility for everything. all you need to do is to take care of yourself and not get hurt, okay?"

that's when you started crying real happy tears. a part of you felt really bad that you were playing around with him but you were also touched by the depth of the love he had for you

" i think you should tell him the truth now, s/o" lilia popped beside you, causing you to shriek in surprise

malleus's hold on you tightened, afraid that you would fall and injured yourself

"what truth, lilia?"

NOW that's when you wanna dig a hole and never come out.... because it's so hard to confess that it's a prank and you have to watch the excitement in malleus's eyes die down into disappointment

"i see," malleus mumbled, scanning your figure up and down to make sure that... you aren't lying and that you are completely fine without anything growing inside your stomach

that's when bat daddy comes in to save this awkward situation!

"don't look so sad, malleus. you can just propose to her right now and have a baby later on! it's much safer to protect her by giving her the title of crown princess, right?"

malleus's eyes shone with excitement, agreeing with whatever that lilia had just said

you stare at the bat dad, jaws opened wide as you mouthed to him "what the fuck"

lilia only grins mischievously, giving you his signature half lidded eye look

"what? im just helping you to speed up the marriage process!"

you turn back to malleus, trying to tell him that you guys can get married after graduation

but the determined look in his eyes tells you otherwise. in his mind, he is already planning out on how to propose to you, what day you guys should get married, who to invite, the colour of your baby's room, the education needed for your child and etc etc

now, are you the one pranking or did you just got set up by lilia?

[thel1ghtningthief]

okay time for my ethan nakamura headcanons buckle in folks

• his mortal parent is his mother! shes a model lol

• his mom is married to drew tanakas mortal mom < 3 aka him and drew are step siblings!!! (i technically head canonned this before joining the server but shoutout titan army server...)

• hes bisexual but is scared of girls

• he loves ferrets! he had two ferrets at home called noodle and cucumber

• his best subject in school was math, but his favourite was english (ancient greek unit specifically. he wrote so many essays about nemesis)

• hes autistic. this one actually has a sorta thematic reason and isnt just me projecting!!! autistic people often have a VERY strong sense of.... justice. yep. also cause hes just like me fr

• he has a diary he was COMMITED to writing in every day, and he did. he wrote in a code he made up so nobody else could read it

• his best 'friend' in the titans army was alabaster

• alabaster wasnt just a friend 🥰 #ethabaster 4 life

• his last thought before dying was how DREW would have to break the news of not just his death to their parents, but his betrayal. he almost regretted it.

• he only has one crusty eyepatch but he really wants a pure gold fake eye. like sclera and all

• he was in the hermes cabin for 2 years before luke defected. he was really close to luke and left almost immediately after he did.

• he doesn't hate his (divine) mother. he feels like he should... but he cant.

• hes met nyx!! i think nyx would love meeting her grandchildren tbh

• he lived in toronto before going to camp Half-Blood. him and drew are year-rounders because their moms travel for work a lot (ethans mom is a model and drews is a fashion designer). they go home whenever they can

• his and drew were REALLY close. they acted more like twins than step siblings sometimes

also shoutout to the pjoverse server yall saw these first

[greypetrel]

WIP Wednesday

Tagged by @pinayelf (thank you! You're tagged back if you have something! :3) and @plisuu , thank you both so much! :D

Working on the Whale (not) AU, some more concepts for Aisling. This time it's costumes. We do have ✨Secret pants ✨, aka a biking suit with an old aran sweater of dad. A swimsuit because how can you study whales outside the water? And her Iceland coat, because dad is Irish but mom is Sardinian and cold wind is there to make her sick. The overall mood.

Working on another tarot card. I'm struggling with Aisling's, so I'll go with Radha. Can you guess which Major Arcana is it?

Sketchy mcSketchy over the Height difference doodles. Nobody dares say no to the King of Ferelden, for very unknown reasons.

This has sat in my wip folder for MONTHS, and it was too much since I last did some cullavellan, so. Someone put up some weight as he's feeling better, and someone else is very appreciative. The nice thing about starting with shaded colours is that my memory is shitty and I now have NO Idea what that colour that pillow was supposed to be. 😎

Tagging: @salsedinepicta, the birthday girl @ndostairlyrium, @hollytree33, @shivunin

@blarrghe @idolsgf @daggerbeanart @whimsyswastry @fensyl and YOU who are reading

[url-is-url]

At this point this is barely more than a doodle but, alive!Ember headcanons

I hc that she had lots of curly blonde Disney princess hair and big brown eyes and she absolutely hated both of these traits. Her aesthetic would have been somewhere between goth and like, proto-grunge. She's not a fire-themed ghost because she died in a fire, though she did, she's a fire-themed ghost because her other hobby besides music was arson. I imagine her being in high school in the very late 70s to early 80s - she would have died when Jack and Maddie were in undergrad - because that's when Siouxsie and the Banshees were big and her eyeliner is very Siouxsie imo. I also hc that Ann Wilson of Heart was her bi awakening.

My Ember is very, very auDHD. Her special interest is music, but like me she has "hyperfixate on ALL the things!" disease so she's not just into the playing and listening to music, she's also a huge geek about the audio tech side of things, and music history, and she can't be left alone with an instrument or she will try to play it even if she doesn't know how, and she's probably experimented with building her own instruments and recording gear. With her sensory differences, she can hear all sorts of shit that nobody else hears, and depending on the fic I do take this in a supernatural direction; sometimes she hears ghosts and shit even before she becomes a ghost herself.

So we've got a socially awkward child who hears things other kids can't hear and likes to set things on fire because it looks pretty and the crackling sound is a good stim. In the late 70s and early 80s. AKA... right when the Satanic Panic kicks off! I hc that she grew up in one of those judgemental small towns where everybody is all up in everybody's business, and about 60% of the other people in her town were convinced that either A) she was possessed by a demon, B) she straight up was a demon, or C) she was gonna be a serial killer when she grew up.

Enter Ember's biggest defender, her mom, the weirdest church lady. Mama McLain is inspired by two things: my own family history of southern folk magic, and the line in Hadestown that says "you might say [Orpheus] was touched... because he was touched by the gods themselves!". Mama McLain acknowledges that her daughter is a bit touched in the head, but she insists she's touched in the head by God/Jesus/Saint Gabriel, so mind your own biscuits. This is the kind of woman who whips out a dowsing rod when the neighbors need to build a new well, so she never blinked an eye about Ember claiming to be able to hear the trees growing if she held her breath, and if she's still alive she's perfectly aware that Ember is a ghost and keeps in touch with her accordingly. My mental image of Ember's dad is less firm, I imagine he's a long-haul truck driver and also very, very autistic (hence why being alone on the road so much doesn't make him crazy), so he thinks his daughter's eccentricities are Just Fine, Thank You. Father-Daughter Bonding Time consisted of Papa McLain tinkering on his truck while Ember tinkered with her record player and neither of them spoke to each other.

I know that ghost!Ember canonically has green eyes, but for some reason whenever I draw her I want to give her lavender eyes, so I did.

[davenweenie]

Let’s go! More Lab Rats HCs!

My exams are finally over, not sure how I did yet but we can hope I did well. Anyway, enjoy :)

-when Chase finally decided to sleep in Kaz’s bed one night, it was so comfy that he couldn’t go back to sleeping in his capsule for about two weeks.

-the only reason Chase went back to sleeping in his capsule was because he started glitching and a knife flew at him out of Oliver’s hand. Oliver nearly cried. Chase was fine.

-when Adam and Leo finally come to visit the Elite Force penthouse, they both give Kaz the shovel talk. The normally very friendly and kind (aka golden retriever energy) Adam was more terrifying than anything Kaz had seen. He wasn’t sure how this was the same guy that he met on the island and joined the class of.

-Leo is incapable of seeming scary to anybody. That is until he throws a laser sphere at them and burns their hair.

-Tasha is their mum (I’m sorry I cannot say mom, I’m too British for this) and will be forever. She bakes them cookies all the time when she visits. Everyone loves her.

-adding to the Chase is trans headcanmon, when Douglas came into their lives again (evil or not) he didn’t mention it. He knew that he had planted bionics in two girls and one boy but when he met them, he didn’t say anything. He didn’t need to. It wasn’t necessary. He didn’t see the point in talking to Chase about it, or calling him out. Chase was Chase now, and he was happy like that so Douglas didn’t care.

-Chase was the one to bring it up with Douglas, asking him ‘how come you never talk about the fact that you had two girls and one boy? I mean, I know you know.’ And Douglas just sighed, put his phone down and made Chase sit in front of him. He explained to him that it was none of his business to ask about his gender. He told him that he hadn’t been around his whole life so it wasn’t his place to talk to him about it. Chase cried for the first time in years.

-once they move out around 15 years into the future, Skylar and Bree adopt two tuxedo cats that look just like each other. They’re called Noodle and Soup. They will later adopt a kitten and name it Chicken.

-Kaz wants to live on a farm and have loads of animals, however he realises that Chase would actually die (not really, I’m exaggerating) if he lived around that many animals. So they settle on living in a countryside house and adopt an old Doberman with alopecia because nobody else wanted him. The shelter had named him but they decided to change his name to Jude. They love him very much. And he has no hair, so Chase doesn’t have sneezing fits.

-I imagine when bionic people glitch it’s like when people with tics/Tourette’s have motor(physical) tics. (Also I have Tourette’s so leave me and my comfort hc alone) so a lot of people in high school bullied Adam, Bree and Chase about their glitches.

-Chase gets electric shock a lot because of his magnetism app. His hair goes all static.

-Kaz thinks it’s really cute and hilarious. He thinks Chase looks like a hedgehog.

-Chase doesn’t actually like coffee. It makes him jumpy and anxious. So when he’s tired he doesn’t have any pick-me-ups to help him out. He used to electrocute himself with a taser to wake himself up, people were mortified when they found out and urged him to just sleep more.

That’s all from me today. Hopefully will get some more out soon xx

[necr0lysis]

i like seeing posts in the autism tag that talk about being disabled. yeah that post about happy stimming is fun but look here's some information that might make someone realize they're disabled! because for me, like two years ago it wasn't "i'm struggling to do this because i'm disabled and i need some help with it" it was "oh yeah that's just another one of the things that i can't do for some reason. it'll probably screw me over one day but i can't do anything about it"

so here i give you a long (long does not mean extensive, there are a lot of other things i do not mention in here like my semiverbalism and dysphagia, these things also contribute to my support needs as well as the things listed below) rundown of what i struggled with in terms of taking care of myself. i would say in my childhood and early teens i was low support needs but still a child who wasn't getting help from adults and now i would say i'm medium support needs as an adult as moving out and coming out of a huge dissociative period + being in burnout for so many years caused regression. i definitely was more capable of living on my own in middle school than i am now.

TW: for talk about abuse, neglect, body fluids, disordered eating habits, mention of drugs, etc

how i struggle to care for myself

as a kid (ages 5-12) *being half way cared for by my mentally ill mother

toileting: delays in learning how to use a toilet and knowing when i have to go. purposely urinated in clothes when i did not want to stop what i was doing

brushing/washing hair: my mom would chase me around the house to get my to brush my hair. i absolutely hate the feeling of it and it would cause meltdowns often and my mom would end up hitting me with the brush asking why i was being so difficult. i was difficult because it hurts! we decided to cut my hair short "like ellen" as i said when i was a kid because it was turning into a huge mat every week that my mom had to work at with a huge comb and a bunch of conditioner. i am a cis woman and very shortly i had to move down to NC where nobody knew if i was a lesbian or a trans guy but god do they hate both of those types of people down there!!! but i couldn't take care of my hair so it stayed short until i was 18 and caused so many issues for me.

eating: meltdowns when i had to eat "real food" aka stuff that's not my safe food. delays in learning how to use utensils and got very angry when they said i couldn't eat with my hands

brushing teeth: very similar to hair brushing. i did not enjoy the feeling of brushing my teeth so my mom would tell me to do it and i just wouldn't. it didn't matter to me.

emotional/mental health: did not ever understand or talk about my emotions. would go outside and run down a hill with shorts on then halfway down i would let my legs give out so i would fall the rest of the way down and scrape up my hands and knees. did not know why i did that when i was younger now i know it was self injury stims because of emotions

appropriateness/responsibility: frequently got overstimulated by my clothes and walked around both the house and the neighborhood naked. i remember my neighbors calling the cops one time

teen years (ages 13-18): *being abused by alcoholic stepmother

toileting: was bothered by the sound of the toilet flushing and also it wasn't always safe to leave my room so i would have to pee in cups often :/ as i got older i started to feel ashamed of it but couldn't really do much about it

brushing/washing hair: my short hair was washed maybe once a month in middle school and once a week in high school. still never brushed. my hair has been thinning since age 14 and i honestly don't know if it's stress or malnutrition or something else but yeah my whole life i've felt like a very ugly Thing.

eating: from age 11 to 15 i lived in NC with my father and step mother. my father did nothing while my stepmother was very open from the beginning that the reason they did not feed me was because i was "acting r*tarded" and "maybe i would get some food if i started acting more like a human being". this was all kinds of fucked up and i realize that now but at this point in my life i hated myself so much i was like "yeah yknow what ur probably right. i don't deserve food"

brushing teeth: still could not brush my teeth (maybe did like once every two months) but wash feeling very ashamed and grossed out by myself. i learned that i had gotten so used to the feeling of texture on my teeth that it feels very weird and slippy and slimy if i brush my teeth to be smooth. this realization made me feel non human. like just so grossed out by myself but can't change it no matter what i try

emotional/mental health: still hurting myself during meltdowns and when frustrated. still did not really understand my emotions. i was given a depression diagnosis and an anxiety diagnosis so in my mind those were my only options when someone said "how are you" cus they tend to get annoyed if you always say i don't know.

appropriateness/responsibility: people in school would always tell me i'm talking about things i shouldn't say in public. it never made sense to me. i was very confident in my ability to move out and live on my own despite still not mastering skills that most people have down by age 8. silly me, i have learned a lot about what i can't do since trying to move out

recently (ages 19-20): *being taken care of by my amazing bf (i'm at his house about 20 days a month. used to be i spend half the week there then half the week here but i've been struggling so it's usually two weeks in a row then a few days home then back to his house for a week, etc)

toileting: i use the toilet every time but still sometimes struggle with telling when i need to go and will often not be able to tell until it is almost too late

brushing/washing hair: on days i'm home alone i don't do any hair stuff. it's painful and gives me anxiety and i don't wanna have to think about my biggest insecurity so when i am at my bfs house he body doubles in the shower with me so i am able to wash my hair about once or twice a week. brushing is still extremely painful so i usually just do after using my fancy conditioner and detangling spray.

eating: eating is difficult because of my trauma. i feel a sense of anti-hunger even if my body is screaming out in pain for food i can't register food as safe or something that i wouldn't want to engage in unless i am high. i do technically have a dependence as i can't stop or else i will be throwing up so much that i'd have to go to urgent care. but weed has helped my food aversion, my meltdowns and emotional reactivity. obviously it's making my adhd worse but i'm able to eat and have less meltdowns woo

brushing teeth: i now feel the opposite as i did when i was a teenager and i like smooth teeth HOWEVER my executive functioning is still bad enough that it doesn't ever get done unless my boyfriend tells me i should do it or i see him doing it and i am able to join it

emotional/mental health: i have meltdowns maybe 3 times a month. i bite and or hit myself probably every few days. my emotions are confusing and loud and i cannot contain frustration i NEED to feel pain or else i will start breaking things and yelling.

appropriateness/responsibility: i do not know how to drive. my caseworkers want me to learn but i am not confident in my visual processing skills or my multitasking skills at all. if my life depended on me driving to a hospital i would die. i don't have a job. i think i might be able to work part time if i had accommodations. but only if i had accomodations. otherwise i'd get fired immediately. i refuse to make eye contact. i have IBS and would have to be allowed to go to the bathroom whenever i need for however long i need. i have dyscalculia i cannot work any job with numbers. i don't care if the cash register tells me change if i read the numbers wrong and give wrong change i will get fired. i have dyspraxia i cannot wait tables or be in a situation where there is a time limit. i'm autistic and will not be able to go home and feed myself if all my energy is taken up talking to customers or coworkers. its very easy for everyone to look at me and go "get a job" but at a certain point you have to use ur brain and think "hmm this woman can't take care of herself without help and she's also been neglected and abused for 18 years out of her 20 year old life.. maybe she won't be the best employee"

[aqqleshiqqing-archive]

me rushing to your bed like that candance MOM HOLY FUCK meme with chicken soup bc mwa anyways let's get this bread 💬 with jaide stone and zinnia since women hating women is a thing 😔🤙 (might throw you more idk) also highly honored to have my ocs in your s/i list 🫡 those are my boys

i may not be drinking chicken soup but i have nice tea to warm my itchy throat ✨✨ thank you mwamwa also of COURSE i have to include some of your OCs especially clear. it's almost hard for me to imagine the story without maroon or clear in it 😭

okay. oh no. my switch has been flickered. you decided to ask ME about ZINNIA? aka the woman who completely altered ruby's childhood? while I understand her hatred towards steven and devon corp itself she's still got issues that im not EXCUSING MF 💥 women hate women still exists im afraid and jaide stone is nothing but a hater when this lady comes around 💥

okay so let's start in the R/S arc. the salamence event happens, ruby gets injured. sounds easy right? sure, but why did it even happen in the first place? nobody knew where the salamence came from - that's what jaide held the biggest contempt for.

"who in the world, was this sick and twisted to allow their dragon creature come to fight harmless children?"

she didn't have the answers yet, but the day would get even worse when she also learns that steven's devon corporation has gone through with an accident that had something to do with... releasing the sky legend. and it was because of a salamence as well. while I imagine steven refusing to disclose that specific detail about caging a beast down (corporation secrets, you know?) it's still easy to tell jaide that he's very upset, combined with him learning what happened to ruby too. it was not a great day for anyone, not even professor birch, I'm sure.

but from that day onward, jaide would do her best to find out the perpetrator that caused this trauma on the children, she's not just doing this for ruby, but for sapphire as well. she's had this same feeling as before, when gold gets in trouble for dealing with the evil scums of the g/s/c arc. she just knew that feeling too well, and didn't want it to happen again. her willpower to find out the truth keeps expanding as she's forced to watch the strained relationship between ruby and steven become stronger as time goes by - they rarely talk about that incident, but it's like a core memory to everyone involved there.

proceeding to the oras arcs, i can't really imagine jaide to be very involved from the get-go, but that would be until she would learn about the meteorite that would come to destroy all of hoenn - she's more or less of a supporting character. i would have to reread this again to give you a full answer on what she can do

but let's skip to the good part, when jaide does learn that zinnia was the one responsible for all this. i can't remember the sequence of events too well, but let's assume it all happened on this part where zinnia brings fourth the reformed magma and aqua team. (again i could be assuming the sequence of events wrong but yeah shh)

she has no idea who she is, but from the way she spoke so lowly about devon (a company that everyone loves) and having that intimidating salamence by her side - she couldn't help but assume maybe this could be the one. combined with jaide's smart sense of pokemon nature reading - she can only assume it was the aggressive salamence that fought without rhyme or reason from years ago + the same salamence also attacked steven's corporation.

i like to imagine jaide didn't say much as first, as she's not one to be so brash and act upon it quickly and allows zinnia to proudly monologue about her plans, slowly trying to understand what's going on. part of her plan includes stealing the keystones to win the favor of the sky beast, and who else had a keystone? steven stone.

sending out her goodra, it immobilzes steven with its goo and commands it to steal his stickpin - jaide panics but steven wanted her out of this. but just in the nick of time:

ruby comes in a clutch to stop the goodra from stealing his stickpin. distracted, jaide would try to lunge at zinnia and try to apprehend her and keep her in place - grabbing her wrists and looking at her dead in the eyes - quite the angry mother, huh? while she didn't understand the whole context of what's going on, she knew that zinnia was bad business and wanted her to talk it out. that's when jaide asks her to confirm her speculations

"your salamence, that was the same one from 9 years ago, wasn't it? it wrecked havoc in the corporation."

zinnia would snicker.

"of course! it was also thanks to a little boy that made it even more agitated, and it broke off the cages to set the sky legend free."

her suspicions would be correct, it was the same one that harmed her son 9 years ago. the events lined up exactly with the woman's words.

jaide... was furious. but, she can't just fight all of a sudden, it's not like her but the least she can do was to call upon her ursaring to keep zinnia pinned - I mean, she got the boss, right?

zinnia would snicker at steven again.

"you're married? it would seem you're not the most honest husband around."

jaide assumed she was just... trying to piss her off. but in reality, jaide was missing a few chunks of context that steven had regrettably hidden away from her.

ruby stopped his mother from being passive aggressive towards the perpetrator, and would give up his and emerald's keystone bracelets just to simply say that he "wants this to be over."

it wouldn't be long before zinnia sets out, thanking ruby for the keystones and flying out of the place. jaide was stunned, steven looked dejected again.

it would seem he still has to clear up a few things about what he and his father does for a living.

it's complicated to be a family and business man at the same time.

[kawaiithinglover]

Masterlist

The House of dragon

Protective twin ( Jace twin × brother Jace ) | coming soon | not romantic stuff just Jace being a protective twin series

Aemond × Jace twin | coming soon |

Fake or true love ( Oc! Aemond twin × Jace ) | coming soon | series

The lion Queen (Oc! Targaryen × oc ) | coming soon | series

Not the father!? ( Jace twin Oc × Aemond ) | coming soon | series

Break my heart ( Oc × Targaryen male oc) | coming soon | series

Aemond with an Android S/o wife (like Conner from Detroit become human) | coming soon |

Be my lover ( Oc × Aegon ) | coming soon |

Queen of mean ( Aemond × Aegon × Y/n poly relationship) | coming soon | series

One-eyed Aemond Targaryen luck ( Queen oc × Aemond ) | coming soon | series

Aemond with a dragon! Reader | coming soon | I was highly aspiraed by @justrandomthoughs

Aemond with a Phantomhive reader ( Ciel twin ) | coming soon |

Yandere house of dragon with a adopted hybrid s/o | coming soon |

Yandere house of dragon with an adopted hybrid s/o pt. 2 | coming soon |

Slashers

Slashers with a witch s/o | coming soon | highly aspired by @the-slasher-files ( finish )

Slashers with a little sister s/o | coming soon |

Slashers with a pregnant S/o | coming soon |

Jason Voorhees with mermaid s/o | coming soon |

Michael Myers with a cat s/o | coming soon |

Slashers with a siren S/o | coming soon |

Wednesday characters

My series 👇

Chapter four | coming soon |

Chapter five | coming soon |

Chapter six | coming soon |

Chapter seven | coming soon |

Chapter eight | coming soon |

Chapter nine | coming soon |

Chapter ten | coming soon |

The end | coming soon |

A/n I just found out what the actor did the actor Xavier did and I'm really disgusted. I don't even know Percy ( I think that's what his name is ) but I didn't want to write Xavier anymore. But I still will because some people just like Xavier in general and not the actor but I like Xavier in general and not the actor. Does that even make sense I don't wanna offend anyone everyone has different options on what to do.

Male Enid × Werewolf! S/o | coming soon |

Male Wednesday × gf Vampire! S/o | coming soon |

Poly relationship ( Male! Wednesday × Male! Enid × Gf! Reader ) | coming soon |

Teenage pregnancy | Male! Wednesday × reader |

Wednesday × Sister! Reader | coming soon |

Anime

None yet

Avengers/ Marvel/ Dc

Nothing else yet

Request page

You can request anything

Something I had to say

And I think that's it for now

A/n

Oh A/n I was aspire by one author for my hybrid dragon one. I just forgot the name of the volg. If you know tell them that I was highly aspired by them. Thank you!

You can repost and use my stuff but ask me first before you do that. (You can only if I get the credit for my work because I will just say yes anyways)

[ammy246]

Analyzing “Sacrifice” aka Raven Branwen’s Song

“Close your eyes, now time for dreams. Death is never what it seems. Did the things you thought you should. All the things they said were good.”

Raven was there when Summer died, and knows the truth nobody else (aside from Salem) has knowledge of. Summer did what she thought was the way to save everyone, but it did not work as she planned.

“All your faith in ancient ways leaves you trapped inside a maze. Take the lives of those you need. Sow the death then reap the seed. Reap the seed!”

This is referencing to both Ozpin and Salem. Raven views Ozpin’s mission to save Remnant as a suicide mission since every huntsmen/huntsmen is essentially being sent to their death. Salem will kill anyone who stands in her way, and shows no mercy to anyone.

“Born an angel, heaven sent. Falls from grave are never elegant.”

Summer had the power of the God of Light (Silver Eyes) and could essentially be viewed as an angel on Remnant. However, as potentially foreshadowed in Volume8, Salem turned Summer into a Grimm monster after her defeat. ‘When she met mom, She realized she could do something new’ -Ruby. Whether Raven witnessed this or assumed Summer’s fate is unclear.

“Stars will drop out of the sky. The moon will sadly watch the roses die.”

This has two meanings 1) The God of Darkness shattered the moon and Salem ‘died’ from meteors. The roses could resemble the previous humans of Remnant who perished. 2) The moon resembles Raven, the roses Summer, and this states how whatever happened to Summer traumatized her.

“In vain. Lost, no gain. But, you’re not taking me!”

The mission failed. Salem lived, and Summer perished. However, Raven clearly did not die that day, and most likely used her semblance to flee before meeting her own end.

“You can’t have my life. I’m not your sacrifice. You can try, but I’m free, and you won’t conquer me. I won’t crawl, most of all, I won’t fall for you!”

Raven ultimately decided to give up on fighting Salem for good, and decided to focus on fighting for the survival of herself and her tribe above everyone and everything else. She refused to be another casualty of Ozpin’s suicide mission, even if it meant having to abandon her own family.

“Show them gods and deities, blind and keep the people on their knees.”

The Branwen Tribe is ruthless, and will hurt as many people as necessary to ensure their own survival. Raven views this as defying the gods, since Ozpin and Salem are essentially their creations raging war on each other.

 “Pierce the sky, escape your fate. The more you try, the more you breed hate.”

Raven believes she is doing this for the greater good. However, her family now despises her, and views her as the enemy.

“And lies. Truth will rise. Revealed by mirrored eyes.”

Raven hid the truth for years, but ultimately Ruby discovered Raven and Summer’s mission while in the Ever After. This will most likely lead to Ruby/Yang/Qrow confronting her later down the line to get answers.

“What if all the plans you made were not worth the price you paid? Even with the lives you stole, still no closer to your goal.”

This is Raven reflecting on everything she has done to survive. Especially after Yang confronted her, she is now starting to doubt whether everything she had done in the end was worth it. She may be alive, but she is not happy, because all those that she cared about either are dead or they hate her.

“You can’t have my life. I’m not your sacrifice. You can try, but I’m free. I won’t crawl, most of all, I won’t fall for you.”

Despite all the doubt she has had in recent time, Raven still has not given up. She will survive where Summer failed to, and stay out of Ozpin’s war. Whether she succeeds in this endeavor in the long-run remains to be seen. She is the Spring Maiden, which puts a target on her back she cannot erase, after all.

[adammbakri]

Kindergarten

I was particularly enchanted by my new brown sandals that day. I don’t recall where we were walking home from, my mother and I, but I knew we were homeward bound. So all was good, and my sandals were the best!

“Hey, do you want to check this out?” my mother said, unintentionally snapping me out of my reverie. I looked to where she was pointing and saw a playground! “YES!” I thought, or maybe I said out loud. I can't quite remember. So my mother carried me over a little wall that separated the street from the playground, and we strolled straight to what was probably the Disneyland of the village: a count of two miserable swings and a rusty slope. My mother must have put me on the swing for a bit or let me slide down the slope a few times before she said “let’s go.”

She held my hand tenderly, like she always did, and walked me towards a small building just a little distance away.

She knocked on a blue metal door. A lady must have welcomed us into what looked to me like a sea of kids! I did not recognize a single soul. The kids were crying, some more intensely than others, some shrieking like it was the end of the world. I was mesmerized by the new spectacle, flabbergasted by the fact that there were more kids like me and adults like my mother! For up until then, and throughout my long life of three and a half years or four, I thought that it was only me, my mom, my sister Yafa, and my brother Ziad (I have no idea why I had no memory of my two other brothers and my father back then). So for a minute that seemed eternal, I entered another reverie, totally forgetting about the new pair of sandals, which I came to conclude years later that my mother had bought for this very special occasion!

I guess my reverie this time was about trying to mentally and emotionally receive what I was forced to meet for the first time in my life: reality, or so it seemed.

I must have become tremendously confused and in desperate need of security. So I reached out in an attempt to hold back my mother’s hand for reassurance, for warmth and safety, for home, for my own version of reality up until then! But to my complete horror, she had disappeared. Absolutely evaporated. Gone. Transformed into the ether. Teleported somewhere else infinitely far from the place and the moment in time I needed her the most.

Obviously, I went straight to the door, but I was too short to reach the handle. The door was locked, and so was I.

It would be an extreme understatement to say that I cried or screamed or banged on the door. I did all that and more. But the worst of it all, the most harrowing, most spine-chilling aspect of the whole experience was the following: nobody seemed to care! The new world I met outside my mother’s lap, AKA heaven, was loveless, strange, and indifferent to my suffering. At least that is how it felt in my barely four-year-old heart.

Later in my young adult life, through years of self-therapy (thanks in part to the above), I learned the following: there are certain events that happen to us as children that seem to define who we are as adults, our outlook on life, the way we see the world and interact with it, how we EXpress and what we are IMpressed by.

Simply put, as children, we are blank pages that one can easily draw upon with whatever colors they want and in whatever shapes they want. The final result of the drawing might - MIGHT… it IS a possibility - miraculously come out just beautiful! The monumental work of the century! An exquisite piece of art! A legend in and of itself! But for the most part, and it is the sad truth: it's a mess! A mess that, at some point in our life - mainly our young adult years or youth - we are faced with the task to sort out, whether we like it or not.

For us to grow, heal, and thrive, we have to be able to grab hold of the page that was used without our invitation - our own page, our birthright! We may not be able to erase what has already been painted, but we can certainly choose our own brush and add the colors we want, give shape to what might be an incoherent, amateurish drawing, straighten a line or curve it, or simply take a moment to observe our personal portrait and breathe!

Breathe…

And contemplate upon what might have been the masterpiece that demanded our attention inward... homeward towards Light.

Maybe… just maybe that was the journey that made Rumi discover that “wounds are the place where the Light enters you”.

Side note: In defense of my beautiful mother, I have to say that she was the best, most loving and kind mother in the world! Never for a second neglecting me or making me feel unloved. This story represents a natural event in every child's life. This "parting" between mother and child happens on every first day of kindergarten. Its impact, however, is naturally different on children and is associated with many other elements that I am not versed in.  

Adam

[mickgaydolenz]

okay so I know I said I wasn't gonna be on here for a while but i PHYSICALLY CANT keep this dream away from you for much longer. so here :)

I was invited to go to this snooty ass jerk faces house,,,and some random dudes were coming too but it was. it was underwater??? and not just was it under water. WE HAD TO CRAWL THROUGH A HOLE IN THE OCEAN so immediately I back off I tell them no but the snooty kid goes "you have to or else the eels will get in" and in just that moment EELS began swarming us and biting us-but then we made it to his house where the mom forced us to wear sweaters but,. they were sweaters for dogs. 

anywho then I tried to leave and accidentally dug up into the ocean and drowned that hole family 

THEN I was back at home and I was given a big box of candy cigarettes and I was told to use them when I wanted to look cool by the box but every time I put it in my mouth I'd just. eat it. scrumdilly-yum-yum baybeeeeeeeeee

and then I was alone at the grocery store, I think it was costco, and just shopping. doing it all alone like I had moved out? and then I see my friend getting verbally attacked by this middle aged lady??? so I walk over and on my way there I see Paul McCartney but. but it wasn't,,,it was like he was my mother. my mother was Paul McCartney and he just made a shruggy face as he went out some door and I was just thinking "yup. that's my mom. always worrying about one thing or another" but I get to the lady and start getting real aggressive. like. I was asking her what her problem was why she was yelling at her and to knock it off??? then Paul McCartney aka my MOM came back (and btw this was YOUNG Paul McCartney. like. 1964.) and was all "oh (insert younger sister's name) I heard you were being picked on!" THE TEENAGE GIRL WAS (insert younger sister's name) SO I MUST'VE BEEN AN ADULT THEN BUT MY MOM WAS PAUL MCCARTNEY. and the two of them walked me back to my cart and Paul MomcCartney kept complaining that nobody is gonna know I'm an adult they're just gonna think that he's with his kids so he made me go over to my cart and go away :(

then we were all at the movies and (insert younger sister's name) was little again but. the movie theater was...weird. you didn't sit you stood and it was a part of a building complex for like. offices?? and Paul MomcCartney was like "okay kids I'm at work it is the one with flowers on it if you need me"

and inside it wasn't even closed off it was a balcony with stairs you climbed?? and you'd look at the wall across from you and that's where the movie played, but in the meantime whenever somebody stood in front of it it would project a cartoon image of you and I messed around with that for a while until (insert younger sister's name) started getting nervous and wanted Paul MomcCartney so I was like "yeah sure I'll take you to Paul who is our mom" and so I wandered around looking for him an then I found his office and I came in and went to some guy and said "excuse me? I cant remember jf he's a doctor but, does a Dr. Paul McCartney work here?" and the guy just went "mmmm no" but then Paul was like "(insert younger sister's name)! Raya!" and picked up (insert younger sister's name) and told me to go back to the movie or I'd miss it and on my way back I got lost???? I tried to follow this girl whose name was...was Kayleigh or something but she wasn't going to the same one as me so I just got even more lost,, but then I had a sense of Main Character In A Comedy, otherwise known as Monkee Syndrome and I did something stupid. I went wandering in the direction I knew was wrong and came across this rollercoaster that went through a house and I was like "oh goody entertainment :D" and it was one of those single sitter ones that kinda made you lay down too, and then the girl from all those fever dream videos walked by and I went "hey! I follow you! I didn't know you were from (my state)" and then just emotionlessly she said "I'm not from here" and wandered off but anyways the rollercoaster went through this tiny house and it was surrounded in other tiny houses and I just thought those were different rides but when I clicked go it went FASTER THAN LIGHT

and there were so many twists and turns??? it hurt my back uncontrollably!!1!!1!!! and I yeah was kinda screaming. loud surprised grunts is what I'd call it. BUT THEN THE ROLLERCOASTER WENT THROUGH EVERY SINGLE HOUSE AND ONE OF THE HOUSES HAD A TWISTED SHAPED TRACK TOO IT MADE MY BACK DO THE SNAKE THING WHICH HURT LIKE HELL 

and then I was spit out a different house??? and I was like "oh man now I'm REALLY Lost" and looked around trying to stay calm because I HATE being lost and when I turned around A CLOWN WAS STANDING THERE

and I will tell you this. I thought this was all real. because when I screamed it felt like I real scream and not like it was just a croak,,,and he kinda just stared at me and I thought "treat him like this is a dream,,, scare HIM" so I went over to him yelling at him screaming that he was an asshole and everything then he started running away from me and figured he knew the way out so I 'chased him' but only just followed him really, then I accidentally kicked him in the back of his knee and he fell down and SLAMMED HIS FACE INTO A CURB, ngl I felt really bad because he started whining but I didn't help him but I sorta found my way out and kept looking for my theater because I didn't wanna miss my movie and whenever I'd walk by someone my walking would get really slow and I hardly moved and my knee started to hurt? so not only did I have a walking pace I was limping??? I looked like a damn zombie. which was weird. eventually I was just home??? but I realized I have no way of telling anyone that because I lost my phone on the rollercoaster,,,so I kinda just go BACK even though I literally hitch hiked on a freeway to get back??? and then I woke up

FUCKING RAYAAAAA!!!!!! DUDE ONE I LOVE THAT YOU COME BACK FROM THE FOGGY MIST OF REAL LIFE TO DELIVER THIS BANGER TO ME, AND TWO UM HI I MISS YOU I HOPE YOU ARE DOING WELL!!!! momcartney is everything to me btw, fucking god damn dude i missed hearing your dreams 😭💖