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arlana-likes-to-write · 2 years

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Letters to a Goodbye

Part 2 of It's Okay. Let me Go

Summary: You gave Natasha an important mission to delivery the letters you've written before the time heist. These are those letters.

Warning: character death, guilt, good-bye letters, Natasha needs a hug in this one.

Word Count: 7.6

Natasha kept the letters with her till after the funeral. They felt heavy in her pocket but there was so much grief, it felt wrong to add more to it. But as the funeral died down, she was uncertain about the future, unsure of what the next move for the Avengers was. Wanda was the first letter. She found the Sokovian by the water’s edge, lost in her thoughts. The Black Widow walked over to her. “Hi,” she softly said, not wanting to disrupt the calm moment.

“Hi,” Wanda said, not looking away from the water. “I’m sorry about Y/n,” Natasha hated how much it hurt to hear your name. It felt like there was a snake wrapped around her heart and lungs, squeezing so tight. Wanda looked over her shoulder, her eyes were glossy with tears. “She was good.”

“Yeah, she was,” Natasha said, sitting down next to her. “I’m sorry about Vision.” Wanda looked down at her hands at the mention of his name. A few tears left her eyes. “I wish we could have done more.” Wanda nodded, wiping the tears away.

“Me too,” they sat in silence, watching the water and the wind blow through the trees. Finally, Wanda’s letter became too heavy. She took it out of her pocket.

“Here,” she said, handing it to her. “I don’t know if this letter will help or hurt more. But knowing my sister, it will probably help.” Wanda took it with shaky hands.

“She wrote me a letter,” Wanda said in disbelief. Natasha nodded.

“Her backup plan as she called it,” the Russian picked up a rock and skipped it across the water. “It seems like she knew she wasn’t going to come home.” Wanda smiled, tapping the letter against her hand.

“That sounds like her,” Natasha nodded.

“I have more letters to give out,” she said, standing up. “But I’m here for you, Wanda. You aren’t alone in this.” She walked back towards the cabin.

“You aren’t either,” Wanda’s voice stopped the Black Widow. “I know a thing or two about grieving a sibling.” Natasha sighed.

“I feel like I’ve grieved her too many times,” she admitted not turning around to face her. “When I defected to SHIELD I never thought I’d see her again, I didn’t want to see her. So, I grieved for a sister I never wanted. But then Yelena and I reunited with her and a piece of me that I didn’t know was missing was found. We were going to be a family again. But now,” Natasha looked back at the witch. “She won’t be coming back this time. I wish there was a way to tell her we did it. We won.” Wanda smiled.

“She knows. They both do,” Natasha nodded, looking back at the cabin. Yelena was sitting on the steps of Tony’s cabin, watching Morgan play with Nathaniel and Lila. The blonde had barely said two words to her or anyone. “She’ll come around, Nat. Just give her time.” The redhead nodded.

“If you need someone. I’m here.”

Wanda watched Natasha walk back to the cabin. Her shoulders were hunched in grief. She was holding onto so much guilt but Wanda didn’t want to go through her mind to see what happened, it wasn’t her place. She looked at the letter in her hand, she felt undeserving of one. Her fingers traced over her name. Letting out a shaky breath, she opened the envelope and unfolded the letter.

Wanda -

I wish I could offer my condolence in person but like we talked about all those years life is so uncertain. I am deeply sorry about Vision and I wish there was more we could have done. I remember you asking me if I have ever found love and I said no. But I was wrong. Indeed, I never had a chance to find love like you and Vision but I found love in other things; my sister, my parents, and how beautiful the world is when you are free to live it. I have to admit I envy the love you and Vision got to share but I am also grateful. I can’t put into words the pain you must be feeling.

You have been through a lot, Wanda Maximoff. You’ve lost and gained and lost again. No, I didn’t ask Natasha for your story, it would be wrong of me. That being said, it would be unfair of me to ask you to keep an eye on Natasha and Yelena when you’ve gone through so much. That shouldn’t stop you from asking them for help. Natasha can be a little rough around the edges and be compared to a feisty cat but her heart is good. Our mother told us to never let the Red Room take our hearts and she kept hers. Now Yelena is probably quiet right now, her emotions all over the place. But I call her little sun for a reason. She provides a light to the world that no one else can. So let them be there for you, little witch.

I wish we could have had that girl’s night we talked about when the world wasn’t ending but it had to be me. I think you’d understand that. We’ll see each other in the next life but I hope not too soon. Live for me. Live for Vision. But most importantly live for yourself.

Wanda refolded the letter and placed it against her chest. She cried. Life was so unfair.

Natasha walked over to Steve. He changed out of his suit and tie and into his Captain America suit. A briefcase was in one hand and Mjolnir was in the other as he talked with Sam. Steve was preparing to return the stones to their correct spot. Sam saw her approaching and smiled at her. “All set soldier?” Natasha asked. Steve nodded.

“As ready as I’ll ever be,” Natasha smiled.

“Can I borrow you for a second?” She asked the super soldier. Sam patted Steve on the shoulder and walked over to Bucky. She found a picnic table, away from everyone, and she knew Steve was following her. She jumped on the top with her feet on the bench and Steve set everything down and sat next to her.

“Do you need a hug?” Steve asked. Natasha nodded, not trusting her voice. The super soldier put his arm around her shoulders and pulled her into him. Natasha let out a shaky breath, enjoying the warmth he gave off. Steve was always naturally warm, it had to do with the serum running through his veins.

“I don’t know how to do this,” she said. Her words were muffled as her face was buried in his chest. But she knew Steve could hear her. “She was my constant for 5 years. For 5 years, I knew she had my back.” Natasha ended the hug and put her arms on her lap, looking down. “How did you deal with it?” Steve looked at Bucky who was shaking his head at something Sam said, who was laughing. He must have told Bucky a joke.

“It was hard,” he finally said, looking back at Natasha. “But I had you and Sam. You helped a lot.” Natasha smiled. “You and Yelena will get through this. You guys are some of the strongest people I know,” Natasha cleared her throat. She pulled out his letter and handed it to him.

“She wrote you something,” Steve took it. “Before the time heist,” she stood up. “Be safe and come back to us.”

“I will.”

Natasha smiled, kissed his cheek, and walked over to the platform where Bruce was working. Steve was transported back to when they stood in front of Fury’s grave and she kissed him on the cheek, telling him to ask Sharon out. He looked at the letter in his hand, a little surprised you had the time to write to him. The super soldier opened the letter

Steve -

I knew you through stories before I met you. My father, the Red Guardian, told stories of how you and he fought. What he failed to tell me was that you were on ice long before he had a chance to meet you. But the man he made you seem like couldn’t compare to the man you are. You're courageous and you hold the weight of the world on your shoulders with a grace I envy. But I think that weight became too much.

I hate to admit but over the past 5 years, I grew to resent you and the other Avengers. You moved on, dealing with the guilt of the Battle of Wakanda in a way that was best for you. Because of that, you didn’t see the guilt that ate at Natasha. You didn’t see the late nights that nightmares kept her up or days I had to force her to eat something because she didn’t deserve food. I’m not telling you this to fill you with guilt. I envied you and the others because you could move on. In the end, you all came back together to rewrite a wrong.

The Avengers are a beautiful family. As families go they have their ups and downs, they fight and forgive, and love each other to the very end. I am glad my sister had you when they needed a family. Your family taught them how to love, laugh, smile, and be free.

You are a good man, Steve Rogers. I hope the best for you and the rest of the team. Thank them for me for being there for Natasha and Yelena when I wasn’t. Thank you.

Steve reread the letter and folded it, placing it in his pocket. He looked up and saw Natasha talking with Sam. He said something that made her laugh. It was good to see her laugh.

Natasha waited with bated breath as she listened to Burce's countdown to bringing Steve back. The doctor right before sending Steve back told her that he tried to bring you back, Vision too. Bruce said one and Steve appeared, a little disoriented when his helmet came off. Natasha noticed he had tears in his eyes. “I tried,” he said. “I tried.” Natasha knew what he meant.

Bucky was saying goodbye to T’Challa. Natasha was surprised to see his name among your letters but the man trained you at one point. He turned around and was surprised to see her. “Natalia,” he said as he walked over.

“Bucky, how are you?” The man looked tired.

“I’m ready for the fighting to be done,” Natasha nodded. She understood that feeling too well.

“I have something for you,” she handed him the letter. “Y/n wrote to you before -” she couldn’t bring herself to finish the sentence. Bucky took the letter with his flesh hand.

“Thank you,” he said. “I’m still getting my memories back, some things are clearer than others. But you sister I remember. She wouldn’t stop talking about you and Yelena,” Natasha fought tears that swelled in her eyes. “It was rather annoying at times.” He said it with a smile and it made Natasha laugh as she whipped away a few tears. “She helped me a lot during that time.”

“Yeah,” Natasha whispered. “I’ll see you around Bucky.”

“Nat,” the Black Widow stopped and faced him. “I’m here for you. Just let me know what I can do.” She didn’t respond but nodded her head. Buck found a quiet place to sit, away from prying eyes, and opened the envelope.

Bucky-

I bet you are surprised that I wrote you a letter but as you’ve come to know I do everything for a reason. I researched what HYDRA did to you and who you were before the man who trained me and so many other girls. I hope you don’t mind but I’m sorry that they put you through that. We had more in common than we thought. So I’m not sure how you remember me but I remember everything; every mission we went on, every minute we trained together, and every time they forced me to watch you get strapped to that chair.

On our last mission, we wrote a list together of things we wanted to do once we were free. Do you remember what we wrote? I found the list not too long ago. So now that you are free, finish this list for me.

Watch a sunset on a beach

Eat ice cream

Go dancing

See the Grand Canyon

Ride a rollercoaster

Go to the movies

Go on a date

Swim in a pool

Dance in the rain

Smile more

Be Happy

Enjoy the freedom, Bucky. You’ve earned it.

Bucky remembered that mission and the list you created. It was a stake and they had time as they sat and waited for the target. He was going to finish this list for you as you were a bright light during his time, it only seemed right.

Finally, Natasha sat down with a sigh. Her body ached down to her bones. She knew it was from everything that had happened. “Is this seat taken?” Clint asked, pointing to the empty spot next to her. Natasha shook her head. The archer sat down next to her, releasing a sigh of his own. “Where are you and Yelena headed to after this?” It took Natasha a second to reply.

“St. Petersburg,” she whispered. “We are going to visit Melina and Alexei,” She called them. It was a short call, a moment of peace amongst the chaos to tell them what happened.

“After that, you are welcome at the farm,” Clint said. “You aren’t alone in this.” It was the sentiment that everyone was giving her. You aren’t alone. I’m here for you. And Natasha was thankful for it but she didn’t want kind words, she just wanted her sister back.

“We may take you up on that,” she had to go find Yelena. “For you,” she handed him the letter. Clint hesitated but took it from her. “Safe travels back home. I’ll call you when we get to Melina’s.”

Clint grabbed Natasha’s hand and pulled her into a hug. The Black Widow tensed up not expecting the hug but soon relaxed in his arms. He felt her tears on his shirt. He understood. It could have been either of them, taking that leap to bring everyone back. But they were alive and they had to deal with you being gone.

He waited to read his letter, keeping it in his pocket on the flight home and the drive up to the house he hadn’t seen in 5 years. It was still there for family dinner and movie night, putting his kids to bed, and laying next to his wife. When Laura fell asleep, he crept down to the kitchen and sat at the dining room table with a bottle of scotch and the letter open.

Clint -

You were sent to kill my sister. You were given a mission to eliminate one of the Red Room’s best agents. But you didn’t. You ignored a direct order and gave her a chance to walk away. In doing so, you gave them freedom and I can’t thank you enough for that.

In those 5 years, you dealt with the Blip in a way you understood. You grieved for a family that was taken away from you, not by your choice. I understand that feeling far too well. You are not a monster or a bad person, who isn’t deserving of this chance to be with your family. You are human. Humans have complicated and messy emotions. So hug your family tight and tell them you love them.

I was in Budapest when you, Natasha, and Yelena destroyed half the city to try to kill Dreykov. As they and you know now it didn’t work. But I don’t want to dwell on that. I want to focus on the good and that is the unbreakable relationship you forged with my sisters. You put yourself in danger to help them defect to a better life. That takes a special (or stupid) type of person to do that.

You, your wife, and your kids invited Yelena and Natasha into your family. I saw how much it hurt Nat that she couldn’t bring you home like she was failing you. But you are home now. Continue to look after them for me. I wish we had more time to get to know each other and that I got to meet Nathaniel. You're a good brother to them, Clint. So thank you.

“Clint?” He looked up through his blurry eyes and saw Laura. She was wearing a robe and a small smile on her face. Without saying anything, she walked over to him and wrapped her arms around him. The archer rested his head on her chest and cried.

“I love you,” he whispered. “I love you so much.”

Pepper got a hotel room for those who didn’t feel like traveling, the woman was a saint. Natasha opened the door to her and Yelena’s room with food from a nearby burger place. Yelena was sitting on the balcony, her feet on the metal railing. She hadn’t said anything to Natasha but her eyes were red and blotchy from her tears. “I got your favorite,” she said, placing the food on the small table. “Well, I tried to get your favorite.” Natasha pulled out two burgers and a large fry. She got Yelena a chocolate and peanut butter milkshake. But the blonde made no move to grab the food. “Please eat,” Natasha said. “For me.” She added. The words left her mouth so effortlessly that they caused her throat to close up. When the guilt got too much, those 2 simple words got her to eat. But Yelena didn’t. She stood up and walked back into the hotel room. “Yelena,” She called after her. “Talk to me please.” Yelena stopped.

“What is there to say?” She asked. Her Russian accent laced the words. It only happened when she was drunk or she was emotional.

“Anything. Just don’t shut me out.” Yelena slowly turned around to face her.

“How did she die?” She asked. Natasha felt her heart skip. Deep down she knew Yelena had every right to know the truth but Natasha wasn’t ready for that conversation.

“What?”

“How. Did. Our sister. Die?” She asked, taking steps to close the distance between them. “I’ve tried to get someone to tell me. I asked Steve, Rhodney, Clint, and even Rocket but no one would tell me. So tell me,” Natasha couldn’t. How could she look in her baby sister’s eye and tell her she was going to lose someone she cared about no matter who came home from Vormir.

“She died to bring everyone back,” Yelena scuffed, throwing her arms to the side. The answer wasn’t what she was looking for. Natasha went to her nightstand and pulled out Yelena’s letter. “Here, she wrote this. It's for you.” Yelena took it. She stared at it, an unclear expression on her face. Soon it morphed into anger.

“I don’t want this,” she threw the letter to the ground. “I want her back.”

“I know-”

“You don’t know!” Yelena yelled. “You don’t know anything. I wanted more time with her. You got 5 extra years with her. That’s not fair!” Natasha let Yelena yell at her. She let her words bounce off of her. At least she was talking even though her words were laced with venom. “We should have gone back for her.” The sudden conversation switch gave Natasha whiplash.

“What are you talking about?” Natasha asked.

“We should have known that the Red Room was still active and that she was trapped. She would have come looking for us if she could have. But you didn’t care about her,” Yelena pointed at Natasha. “You didn’t want to face her and share what we found. You were being selfish. Why didn’t we go back for her?” Natasha was shocked into silence, barely recognizing the girl that stood in front of her. Yelena whipped the tears off her face and turned to leave the room. She opened the door, almost running into Maria as she stormed past. Natasha sat on the food of her bed, hands covering her face. She knew better than to now follow Yelena. The blonde needed to cool down. But the words thrown at her didn’t help the guilt already eating at Natasha.

“I heard yelling and I wanted to see if everything was okay,” Maria said, walking into their room. Natasha didn’t look up. “I can see that it isn’t,” she laughed bitterly, uncovering her face. “Do you need a hug, to talk, or a drink?”

“A drink. I need a drink.”

When Natasha stumbled into her hotel room after a few too many drinks with Maria, she was greeted with darkness. But she did see Yelena’s sleeping form in bed and the letter was picked up. The Black Widow slipped underneath the covers and sleep welcomed her.

It was a strange Deja Vu moment as Natasha walked up to the farmhouse with Yelena next to her. The last time she was here, her family was whole, broken but whole as they tried to come up with a plan to take down the Red Room. Every time you asked her to visit Melina, Natasha gave an excuse. Maybe she should have joined you. The door opened and Melina and Alexei walked out. Natasha heard Yelena let out a shaky breath and quickened her steps to reach the older Russian. Melina opened her arms to engulf the blonde. Natasha slowed down to give the two some space. Being here will be good, she thought. Yelena ended the hug and walked over to Alexei. The Russian super soldier was unsure of himself but Yelena hugged him and he hugged her back. It was a quick hug but Natasha saw Yelena nod at something Alexei said and walk into the house. Natasha continued walking and only stopped when Melina stood in front of her. “Natasha.”

“Hi mama,” she wasn’t expecting the older Black Widow to give her a quick hug.

“You look tired,” Melina said, taking a step back to look at her.

“I’m hungover.”

“Ah,” she smiled. “That would do it. Come, I’ve made food and I can get you something for that hangover.” They walked back to the house in silence. Natasha had three more letters; one for Melina, one for Alexei, and then her’s. She had no idea how you wrote all of these in a short amount of time. Alexei greeted her with a smile.

“Natalie,” he said. “I’m sorry about Y/n.” She wondered how long it was going to be until hearing your name stopped hurting.

“She would be glad it worked and you came back to annoy us with stories of your glory days.” Natasha teased. Alexei laughed and followed her into the house. “Where is Yelena?”

“She asked me where Y/n’s room was,” he said. “I wasn’t if it changed.”

“It didn’t,” Melina assured him but Natasha wasn’t listening. She walked over to the dining room table and it was covered with photos of you and Natasha assumed were other Widows. She recognized one and picked up the photo of you and Soyna with baby pigs, warm smiles on both of your faces. “Some of the Widows want to have a small service for her,” Melina said, standing next to her. “They asked me to get a few things out. I can put it away.”

“No,” Natasha said, putting the picture down. “You can keep it out.” She forgot that part of your life as it seemed like a lifetime ago. While she and Yelena were on the run from the government, you were cleaning up the mess the Red Room made. A mess that shouldn’t have happened if Natasha just went back for you. Maybe Yelena was right. “How is that going?” She asked, following Melina into the kitchen. Melina directed her to sit at a small table. She did and watched the odd Russian couple interact with one another. Alexei may have been gone for 5 years but they moved smoothly in the kitchen. He poured bowls of soup from a pot while Melina made a drink. He set one bowl down in front of Natasha and went to take the other to Yelena.

“We made progress during those 5 years a lot of the Widows were Blipped,” Melina put a glass on the table and sat down with a sigh. “Which is still an awful name.” Natasha smiled, taking a spoonful of the soup. It was good. It provided her with the warmth that she was missing. The drink on the other hand made her gag.

“Did you put vodka in this?” She asked.

“What do you Americans say, ‘hair of the dog?” Natasha rolled her eyes. “But with everyone being back, there is still work that needs to be done.”

“We or I can help,” it was the least she could do and she wasn’t sure what Yelena wanted.

“Soyna is handling it for now,” Melina put her hand over Natasha. “How are you doing?” Natasha wasn’t sure. She wanted to wake up and for this to be a horrible dream.

“I don’t know,” she said honestly.

“Well, you can stay here as long as you need to figure it out,” Melina said. “They may be some extra clothes that she left here but we can go into the city to get you stuff.” Nothing survived the compound being attacked.

“Thank you,” Alexei came back without the bowl in his hand.

“Yelena asked me to tell you she wants to see you. The room is down the hall and to the right,” Natasha went without another word. She found her sister, sitting on the floor with her back against the bed. Without saying a word, Natasha sat down next to her. In her hands was a photo strip that was ripped on one edge.

“I miss her,” Yelena whispered, putting her head on Natasha’s shoulder.

“Yeah, so do I.”

Melina told Natasha that Alexei liked to go fishing when she asked where the super soldier was. There was a creek that flowed on the edge of the property. So Natasha went to find him. It wasn’t hard but the Black Widow was surprised by how peaceful it was and how quiet Alexei was. “Come join me, Natalia,” he said, not taking his eyes off the water. Natasha sat on a rock next to him. “When your sister was here and not freeing Widows, I tried to get her to come fishing with me,” he chuckled. “She wasn’t happy with the early wake-up calls but I told her it was good for her. I probably told her a cool Red Guardian story.”

“Super cool,” Natasha teased. The man smiled.

“I think I was trying to make it up to her,” he said. “I wasn’t the father you girls deserved.” Natasha looked away from him and stared out at the water.

“I remember that day so clearly,” she finally said. “For a second, I thought you’d listen to her. You were going to take Yelena and me back to Ohio,” she looked back at him. “But you didn’t.”

“I didn’t,” he softly said. He brought the line back in and cast it out.

“Do you regret it?” He didn’t respond right away, focused on letting more lines out.

“I don’t know,” Natasha knew it was a complicated question. “I mean I wish you girls didn’t have to go through that but would you and Yelena have become Avengers if I disobeyed an order?” He asked. She wasn’t sure. One of the many possibilities on how her fate could have been different. Natasha took out his letter and handed it to him.

“She wrote you something,” she stood up, whipping the dirt off her pants. “Maybe I’ll join you out here tomorrow.” Alexei nodded, looking down at the letter in his hands. Natasha smiled, leaving the super soldier alone.

Dad-

I remember that day in Cuba so vividly. I had that gun pointed at you and I was ready to fight you and every guard there, even when I knew I didn’t stand a chance. So I pleaded with you to take Yelena and Natasha back home and take me instead. But you didn’t. It made me question if you ever truly cared about us. The first few days I was so angry with you. I hated you. For 3 years you were my dad and I was your daughter. Was it just a mission to you? Did you ever care?

I think it was both. You were following orders but there were moments when I think you cared about us. Remember when a girl in my class said no when I asked her to go to a dance? You asked me if you wanted to go threaten her. Or when some neighborhood kids were picking on Yelena you taught her to stand up for herself. She gave the kid a black eye and as Melina punished her you gave her a candy bar. Natasha wanted to play on the baseball team instead of softball and you stayed up with her to teach her how to catch a baseball and throw one. The mission didn’t require you to do those things. You wanted to be somebody to someone; someone important. You choose Dreykov when to us you were already the most important person. Mission or not, you are our father.

If you are writing this then our plan worked and I didn’t come home but that’s okay. I got to experience the father you could be for 2 years now it's Natasha and Yelena’s turn. Take them to your fishing spot, teach them how to help Melina with the pigs, tell them stories about the birds that visit the farm, and most importantly love them because I know you do.

Also, I fought with Captain America so suck on that!

Alexei laughed, shaking his head. Of course, you would end a goodbye letter in a way to make him laugh. He folded the letter and tapped it against his hand. Cuba will always haunt him. He could see the fear in your eyes and your tears as you pleaded with him to disobey Dreykov. Alexei sighed and looked toward the way Natasha walked. He was going to make it right and be the father they needed.

After dinner, Natasha found Melina in her workshop creating more of the Red Dust. “I have something for you,” Natasha said. Melina put the test tubes down and looked at her. The letter was already in Natasha’s hand.

“Alexei told me about his letter,” she handed Melina the letter. “Have you read yours?” The redhead shook her head.

“If I read it then it cements that she's not coming back,” she said. “That she’s gone.” Melina put the letter down on her workbench.

“Come sit,” Natasha sighed, sitting down next to Melina. “There is a Hebrew poem about death and in that poem, there is a line, ‘As long as we live, they will live, for they are now part of us, as we remember them.’ She may have died but she isn’t gone. She’s here,” she pointed to Natasha’s head. “And here.” She pointed to her heart.

“It’s the same,” Melina nodded, whipping away a few tears. Natasha didn’t realize she was crying.

“No, it’s not but it’s our new normal.”

Natasha stayed with Melina as she worked. Finally, the redhead retired to her room. Melina sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. She went through the Red Room 3 times before any of her children were born. They taught her how to control her emotions but she felt so out of control right now. When Natasha called her and told her of your passing and that she and Yelena were headed to St. Petersburg when they had a moment, all Melina could say was ‘okay’. But deep down her heart was aching. It felt unfair how little time you had. She picked up the letter, carefully opened the envelope, and unfolded the paper.

Mama-

So many years ago you told us to not let them take our hearts. That simple saying kept me alive, it gave me the strength to continue and made me a better person. It made me realize that you kept yours. I remember the look in your eyes when you said, ‘I’m sorry’ to us when Alexei told us we were leaving. You didn’t want to leave either. I wonder what our life would be like if we got to stay in Ohio. Would I go to college? Would Natasha play sports in high school? Would we interrogate Yelena’s prom date and tell them to have her home by 10? These questions kept me up at night and they would hurt.

I’m grateful for the few extra years we had together; late nights in your lab working in silence, cooking dinner for the few Widows that were living with us and helping you take care of the pigs. I wish we had more of those memories but I cherish that.

Do me a favor. Step out of your lab and live. Smile. Be happy. Live your life and breakthrough that conditioning they put you through. It will be hard and painful and scary but it will be worth it. Allow yourself to smile and laugh at Alexei. Cry over stupid rom-com movies. Live for me, mama. I’ll miss you.

Melina dropped the letter down to her desk. She felt the tears form in her eyes. Her throat burned. She couldn’t remember the last time she cried. She covered her mouth and cried.

It was now or never. Natasha paced back and forth in her room with the letter resting on her bed. She couldn’t bring herself to read it. Frustrated, she put the letter on the nightstand, slammed the drawer shut, and climbed into bed.

Screaming woke Yelena up. She jumped out of bed and ran to the door. The scream was from Natasha’s room. She opened the door, almost ripping it off the hinges, and saw Natasha thrashing under the covers. Yelena ran to her side. “Natasha,” she said. “Natasha, wake up. It’s just a nightmare. You're safe.” Her sister woke up with a gasp, eyes frantically darting around the room. “Hey,” Yelena sat on her bed, grabbing onto her face. “You’re okay. I’m here. It’s okay.” She heard Alexei and Melina enter the room but she ignored them. The last time she saw Natasha this broken was after the battle against Thanos at the compound when she learned of your death. Natasha choked on a sob and pulled her into a hug.

“I’m sorry,” she said. It was hard to hear over her tears. “It should have been me,” Yelena pulled away, still keeping her hands on Natasha’s arms.

“What are you talking about?” She took a few breaths to calm herself down.

“We came up with a plan,” Melina sat at the edge of the bed and Alexei took a seat in the corner. “It involved all of us separating into groups and going back in time to get the infinity stones from different parts of the pass,” Yelena understood every other word Natasha just said. Bruce tried to explain it to her when she asked how they did it. “Clint, Y/n, and I went to Vormir,” she stopped, shaking her head. “I should have seen it but I didn’t, not like she did. When we got there, the guardian greeted us. He said -” her voice cracked. “He said that the 2 of us were going to get the stone but one of us was going to lose everything; in every listing exchange. A soul for a soul,” Natasha looked down at her lap. “She hit Clint with her Widow Bites and ran for the cliff. I tackled her but she flipped me over. She jumped but I jumped after her,” Yelena’s hands squeezed Natasha’s arms. “I grabbed her hand and attached myself to the cliff with a grappling hook.” Natasha looked up at her sister. “I pleaded with her to not do it but she kicked the wall and slipped out of hand.” The room was stunned into a heavy silence. Yelena looked at Alexei and Melina, their faces were neutral but their eyes portrayed their true feelings. They didn’t know either. “It should have been me,” she said again.

“No,” Yelena said. “No, don’t say that. How could you say that?” She asked, pushing Natasha on the shoulder.

“It’s true! You said you wanted more time with her. We just got her back and now she’s gone because I-” her voice cracked. “I didn’t save her again.”

“Natasha,” Melina said. “Your sister was as stubborn as you.” Yelena hated the usage of ‘was’. “There was no stopping her.” The redhead pushed the palm of her hands against her eyes.

“I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry,” Yelena wasn’t sure how to help her. She’s never seen her this distraught.

“Sometimes in our lives, we’ll have pain and sorrow,” Yelena whispered. “But if we are wise we know that there’s always tomorrow. So lean on me when you’re not strong and I’ll be your friend. I’ll help you carry on,” she remembered the phrase you used to say to them when life became too hard, nightmares, fights, and when they were being transported to the Red Room. It felt wrong on her lips but Yelena knew her sister needed it. Her shoulders relaxed at the familiar phrase. “I miss her, I do, and I love her. But I need you. I don’t want to choose between losing you or her. I just-” Yelena was struggling to find her words. “I need you. You're my sister, my best friend.” Natasha nodded, pulling Yelena into a hug.

“I’m here,” she said. Yelena felt Natasha’s heart beating.

“We are all here,” Alexei said. “Family, right?”

“A pretty dysfunctional one,” Natasha mumbled. Yelena laughed, ending the hug and looking at Melina and Alexei. This was the reason you gave up your life for these moments. Yelena was still so angry but these moments made it feel worth it.

Yelena waited until Natasha fell asleep and she snuck back into her room. With a sigh, she sat down on her bed and pulled out the letter from underneath her pillow. She ran her thumb over her name and finally opened it. When she opened the envelope, she was surprised to find a sticky note instead of a piece of paper. On the sticky note, a micro SD card was taped onto it, and ‘Throw on the ground’ was written on it. Her hands shook as she took off the card and threw it on the ground. As it landed, a blue hologram version of you appeared. Yelena’s heart skipped and her stomach dropped. You were wearing your tactical suit.

“Is this recording?” You asked, looking up.

“Yes, Miss. Y/n,” the AI answered. You laughed. God, Yelena missed it.

“Sorry FRIDAY,” you smiled. “This is my first hologram.” You looked at Yelena and the air left her lungs. My malen'koye solnyshko (little sun),” she never thought she would hear you say that name. You didn’t say anything but stared ahead. “You are the first letter I’ve written because there is so much I want to say but I don’t know where to start,” you let out a shaky breath. “I am so proud of you. Over the past few years, I looked up all the different missions you and Nat did with SHIELD and the Avengers and you did amazing things. You saved so many people and I am speechless about the woman you’ve become. You aren’t that scared little girl that came running to me when it thundered,” Yelena was still scared of them. “You are brave, wise, smart, and beautiful. You-” Your voice cracked. “Wanda said to me that you wished we had more time together and so do I but it's,” you sighed. Yelena could see the tears running down your cheeks and she knew her face mirrored you. “I want to say it’s okay but we both know it’s not. The world can be a cruel place full of darkness and loss and death and you begin to wonder if what we do is worth it. Because as soon as we remove one man from power another will take its place and the cycle will continue.” You sighed, running your hands through your hair.

“We’ve seen that darkness. You, Natasha, and I were subjected to it and forced to be a part of it. So yes, the world is dark but it’s also beautiful. I got to see a small glimpse of the life you and Natasha created. I watched the sun rise and fall on the compound and count the stars. There are so many stars in the sky I must have been too busy to look up.

“And no your back and I’m gone. My malen'koye solnyshko (little sun). You bring so much light into this beautiful world. Please don’t let my death darken it,” you smiled, wiping away your tears. “Also, be nice to Natasha this wasn’t her fault and I know she’s blaming herself. You guys are going to be just fine. Do you know why?”

“Why?” Yelena found herself asking.

“Because my sisters are the strongest in the world,” you mimicked Alexei’s accent which caused Yelena to laugh. “You're my hero Yelena. Thank you for allowing me to be your sister. I love you.” The hologram disappeared. Her room was quiet besides the pounding of her heart.

“You are my hero, sestra,” Yelena whispered. “You are mine.

Natasha woke up and saw Yelena sleeping next to her. Her cheeks had tear stains. She slowly sat up but the movement caused Yelena to groan, her eyes fluttering open. “Go back to sleep,” she whispered. Yelena nodded, her eyes already closed. Natasha got out of bed and took the envelope out of the nightstand. On quiet feet, she ventured out of the house. She sat on the grass and opened the envelope. She pulled out a sticky note with a micro SD card and wrote on it, ‘Throw on the ground.’ Confused, Natasha threw the card on the grass and a blue hologram appeared. It was you. The day of the time heist. “You son of a bitch,” Natasha gasped.

“Natasha,” you smiled. “I’m sorry that this has happened. I think the universe likes to keep you and me and Yelena apart. But that doesn’t mean we aren’t together or a family.” You sighed, rubbing the back of your head. “I’m not sure what words to say to make this better. Maybe I’m not supposed to make it better, it’s going to be your new normal,” you threw your hands to the side. “I don’t know what to say to you, Nat. I want to give you some sisterly advice or thank you for those 5 years we had together or how much you mean to me as a sister but I think you know that, right?” Your voice was so soft and quiet. “I know you know. I’d do anything for you and Yelena even if a certain redhead reminded me that we weren't,” you teased. Natasha rolled her eyes. “I guess I’ll give you this. No more guilt, okay? And I know I saw that like it was the easiest thing in the world and I know it isn’t. But everything that has happened to me and every girl that was part of the Red Room was not your fault. One person can not save the world, that’s too much pressure.

“I won’t keep this long because I don’t want this to be a goodbye letter. So get out from behind your desk. Find love. Get married. Buy a house with a white picnic fence and a big yard for your dog and kids. Live. Because life,” your hologram looked over your shoulder. Natasha remembered you had a window in your room, you must have looked at it but your hologram turned to look at the Russian sunset. “Is beautiful.” Natasha felt tears run down her cheeks. “Don’t cry for me. I’ll be with you always.”

Natasha looked over her shoulder to see Yelena walking over to her with a blanket over her shoulders. She smiled at the hologram version of you as it disappeared. She sat down next to Natasha, putting the blanket over her shoulders. The sun was slowly rising into the sky, indicating a new day. For the first time in a long time, Natasha took a deep breath in and slowly let it out and her guilt wasn’t as crushing. It would take time for the hurt to ease but she felt free.

You watched your sister look towards the Russian sunrise. With a smile, you walked over to Natasha and sat down next to her. You loved the color of the sky in the morning. ‘Come on, kid,’ you turned around to see Tony. ‘We can’t stay.’ You looked back at your sisters.

‘I think I’ll stay,’ you said. ‘I’d like to see where life takes them.’

Fin.

This was fun! Sorry everyone

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giveamadeuschohisownmovie · 1 year

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Concept for an episode of What If…?: What if Nick Fury’s roster for the original Avengers was completely different?

* This would at least be a two-parter

* This would be one of the most divergent timelines in the MCU since pretty much the entire flow of events would be different compared to the main timeline. Not just different Avengers, but different threats.

* Keep in mind, this timeline is completely different, so the characters that appear will have altered personalities and motivations.

* The line-up, for me, would be -

Alexei Shostakov (Red Guardian) replaces Steve Rogers (Captain America) as the Avenger who is the pride of their respective nation

Xu Wenwu replaces Thor as the Avenger whose powers come from a mystical item(s)

Robbie Reyes (Ghost Rider) replaces Bruce Banner (Hulk) as the Avenger who transforms into a powerful monster

Hope van Dyne (Wasp) replaces Tony Stark (Iron Man) as the Avenger who is a brilliant inventor and an executive of a powerful corporation

Gamora replaces Natasha Romanoff (Black Widow) as the Avenger who is a femme fatale spy seeking to redeem themselves

Frank Castle (The Punisher) replaces Clint Barton (Hawkeye) as the Avenger who is a regular guy and a combat veteran

Despite the changes, there are parallels to the original timeline, such as -

1) The main villain is an evil Shang-Chi. In this timeline, he wants to usurp his father as the leader of the Ten Rings (paralleling Loki’s actions).

2) Gamora feels guilty about abandoning her sister, Nebula (paralleling Natasha and Yelena)

3) Frank Castle is a depressed loner since he lost his family (paralleling Clint’s love for his family)

4) Hope van Dyne requires a constant use of Quantum Realm energy due to an incident in Afghanistan (paralleling Tony’s injury)

5) Alexei Shostakov hopes to see his wife, Melina, once again and is depressed over the loss of his daughter Natasha, unaware that Natasha had actually been transferred to the Winter Soldier program (paralleling Peggy and Bucky)

6) Robbie Reyes is on the run from the Ancient One and the Sanctum Sanctorum due to him keeping the Darkhold away from anyone to use (paralleling Bruce running away from General Ross)

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quietlyimplode · 1 year

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Black Widow Fest 2023 - Day Seven

Mirror, Mirror.

Warnings: dead dove. child abuse, child death (red room)

Word count: 2694

Pairing: nil. Natasha Centric.

A/N: truthfully, this has been a hard one to write but as it got going it got easier. Borne of beautiful artwork by @lightmotifs and a conversation about Natasha looking at herself in the mirror, spawned.. well, this. A five parter of times Natasha looked at herself in the mirror. So please heed the warnings. <3 (also this was supposed to be the last fic of the years bwf but I had to add in Kiss the Dread) As always your comments and support gives these fics life. <3

The scariest thing I had to encounter,

Wasn’t a ghost, or a scary monster.

It was the reflection, I saw as I looked in the mirror.

The moment I had to face,

All the dark parts, I tried hard to erase

Yet as I looked a bit closely, at the eyes staring back at me,

I realised they were still there,

Untouched and unfazed.

Waiting for the day to be let out of their cage.

- Reflection (S.S.W)

1/ Ohio

Touching the bruise softly, Natasha watches her face wince in the mirror. It doesn’t hurt, it stings, maybe that’s the sensation she’s feeling.

She’s old enough to know that she won’t be going to school tomorrow, because they ask questions about those sorts of of things.

Melina had promised to show her how to put make up on bruises, but she’d left in the hours of the morning with Yelena, leaving Natasha and Alexei together.

“Let me teach you something new,” he’d laughed, grabbing her wrist and pulling her away from her book.

“Don’t let the American language corrupt your mind.”

She’d tried to pull her wrist away, but he’d held on, and it was only when she trailed behind him, did she smell the vodka on his breath.

Whatever he had planned to show her, he wouldn’t remember, not being as drunk as what he was.

“Sambo is a man’s sport, but you will learn,” he’d said.

Natasha knows the bruise on her face isn’t the only visible one, but if she thought about what really hurt, her back would be top priority.

She takes her tshirt off to see if it has the same coloured hue as her eye. She takes the chair and puts it under the door so that Alexei does not wander in, and then twisting in the mirror, she catches a glance at her back.

It’s as she suspected, bruises mottling down her spine from where he’d picked her up and crashed her down.

His laugher had made her smile, even as she winced in hurt.

“Come on Natasha, show me how the Red Room girls defend themselves.”

She didn’t really know how to react, and so had thrown a half hearted punch, before he picked her up and threw her again.

Natasha wasn’t sure when it had turned, his laughter turned serious and she’d missed the cue for his anger. Suddenly, his attempt at playing, mutated and as she’d got up again, he pushed her down.

“I win,” he said conversationally.

She missed the warning in his voice as she stood back up.

Natasha tried not to cry when he open hand slapped her in the face, the sound shocking her more than the hit, and she’d stayed down.

He stood over her, grabbing the nearby bottle and taking a swig.

“I win,” he snarled, “I will always win.”

And then stalked off to find a corner to drink some more.

She’d only moved when she’d heard his loud snores coming from the bedroom, and had risen on shaking legs, making her way to the bathroom to assess the damage.

The mirror doesn’t lie, she thinks as she stares at herself, poking softly at the swelling, wishing quietly for a way to swap places with the mirror version of herself.

2/ Location Unknown. Russia.

They’re lined up like they always are, and take their places on the bar. The distance between them is measured and they’ve done this often enough to know exactly what to do.

Madam strikes her switch and the music starts.

Natasha follows the movement and lets her mind wander. It comes with such ease that she no longer even has to think about it.

Today feels different, but she can’t figure out why.

Madam, perhaps looks more strict, but she hasn’t said anything, hasn’t corrected anything, has let them follow the music without yelling or hitting them with switch to correct movement.

The longer it goes on, the more it feels wrong.

There’s no talking.

They breathe hard as training continues longer than it should.

She shares a glance with the other girls, and she knows everyone is feeling the strangeness.

Legs shaking they’re lined up again, and at last; Natasha thinks, they can go into the lunch hall and eat.

Except they don’t.

They’re sat, facing the mirror in the hall, and Natasha takes the opportunity to look at the other girls in the reflection.

Something she rarely does.

They all look as tired as she does.

They all look nervous at the change in routine.

Even those that know how to mask their faces, have shifting eyes and clenched fists.

She stares at herself, and takes her demeanour in, focusing first at relaxing her face, making her features become stoic and straight faced. Next she relaxes her shoulders, keeping her breathing even.

Her legs give nothing away, so she puts her hands flat on her knees and keeps her back straight.

No slouching.

Dreykov enters.

Immediately, her hands tighten on her knees but she sees it in the mirror.

Natasha knows now this is going to be a lesson.

And not a good one.

She stares stoically at the mirror.

Reasoning, that she can see everything in the room, and she can focus on herself.

It becomes more important when Anabelle is dragged in by her hair.

Natasha’s heart sinks.

They knew she was missing in the morning and had gossiped about her whereabouts. They’d concluded that she was in medical.

Because no one would be stupid enough to do what they assumed she had done.

As Dreykov starts to talk, Natasha’s heart sinks further.

She’d tried to escape.

They’d caught her at the border of the forest.

Glancing quickly at her, Anabelle seems to know her fate, her clothes ripped by what Natasha assumes is handiwork of Dreykov’s dogs.

She turns back to the mirror.

If she watches the mirror, she can make it seem like she’s watching an American movie.

She’s not here.

It’s not happening in front of her.

The mirror shows all the horrors, the monologue from a villain.

It’s just a movie, Natasha tells herself, nails digging into her knees.

Nails pieces her skin as the gunshot goes off.

She doesn’t want to look.

Dreykov’s voice is nothing in the back of her head as she watches the blood spread on the floor.

Staring stoically forward, she watches the others stand, numbly; she does the same.

She takes one last look in the mirror, and the scene of horror, and knows the truth that it holds.

3/ Location Unknown. America.

The interrogation room in Shield is simple.

Table.

Chairs.

Handcuffs holding her wrists on the table.

Two way mirror.

She wonders idly how many people sit behind that mirror, how many are evaluating her, if Clint Barton is watching too.

Maria Hill, the SIC of Shield, crosses her legs again and waits.

“We can make this more uncomfortable,” she states.

Natasha doesn’t doubt it.

“But Barton has assured us that you would cooperate, and abide by the rules of your surrender.”

Natasha nods.

Stares at the two way mirror.

“I will,” she speaks to it.

She has no interest in Maria, and is willing to talk, but there’s a certain anxiety that comes with divulging her country’s secrets.

If they find her, she’s dead, but she was already dead anyway.

She wishes she could see him through the mirror.

Instead, she just sees her own face, dead eyes staring back to her.

“Tell us about Bali, and your role in the assassination of American diplomat,” Maria repeats.

Natasha frowns.

“How do you know that was me?”

Maria bristles.

“Was it?”

Natasha doesn’t have enough information to know how much they know. If she lies, or tells less than they truth, and they know more than she tells them, there’s not telling what they’ll do.

It’s not a winnable game unless she answers their questions with more questions and gauge her response from that, she could perhaps play it that way.

It seems too hard though.

And she’ll let Clint down.

After all he went through to get her out.

She looks to the mirror again, and finds her eyes pleading.

Turning back to Maria and sighing, she uses the mirror as an anchor.

“No one ever assumes that the woman in a dress is a threat.”

The tiniest of smiles crosses Maria’s face, and it’s more like a softening of features than anything else.

“I passed him twice, once to slit his femoral artery and the second to make sure he’s dead.”

The clanking of the handcuffs make her brain short out alongside the anxiety, the fact that she’s in America, talking about missions, is tantamount to death.

Dreykov’s face appears in the mirror and her eyes go wide.

“He’s dead,” she says out loud, and the image fades.

Maria nods.

“Yes, he died, as you’ve stated.”

She’s thankful her fuck up isn’t noticed, despite the fact her heart is beating hard against her chest.

“Do you need a break?” Maria’s asks, the words kind, even if the delivery is not.

Natasha shakes her head, calming herself, as she grounds herself by looking back to the mirror.

If nothing else is real, at least she is.

She knows this by the way she raises her head and her mirror image copies the action.

The way she talks and the image opens and closes her mouth in time.

There’s no delay like in dreams.

Hours they continue, and she grows tired of the constant questions, the interrogation that occurs when her story doesn’t line up with her timelines of events.

It’s just, it’s how she remembers it’s happening.

It’s not like she has the mission reports in front of her.

She’s not even trying to hide lies in the truth anymore.

What would be the point?

They’ll either take her in and help protect her from the last standing Red Room members or they’ll kill her.

In the back of her mind, she doesn’t care about whatever way they go.

She’s dead either way, and being alive never seemed to help anyone.

“Tell me about Ohio,” Maria asks.

But it’s too much.

“No,” Natasha states, staring hard at her.

“No.”

“We’ve been at this for hours, days, handcuffed, toileted like a child, made to wait, been asked the same questions, about the same missions over and over to see if my story varies. It doesn’t, and still you ask.”

Sick of the handcuffs, she slips out of them, and rubs her wrists, a familiar action that feels grounding in the moment, allowing her to continue her rant.

Her mouth speaks, her mind wanders.

They know about Ohio.

They might know about Yelena.

“Either kill me or agree to the terms of my defection.”

She stares at the mirror.

“I don’t care,” she finishes, “I don’t care.”

Despondent eyes look back to her as she hastens a glance.

The door opens and Clint strides in.

There’s a sense of dread and relief simultaneously.

“You’re the one they send to kill me?”

He stands next to her, argues, for her, not against her.

He tells Maria off for keeping her in cuffs, for not bringing in food or water and keeping Natasha in longer than she should.

He sighs and she hastens a look up to the mirror finding their images standing together.

Maybe shes not alone in this.

4/ The Avengers Tower, New York.

The mirrors in the lift are usually easily ignored.

Sometimes she’ll even take the stairs.

This time Natasha looks forward to it.

She wants to see how she looks, wants to see how feral she is.

Blood in her hairline, bruises on her face, she smiles at herself.

For once she feels like the outside matches the inside.

The doors close and it ascends upwards without her having to press a button, and she can’t stop looking at herself.

She did good.

Her body, her mind, her training, for once, paid off.

She got Tony out, and he’s safe because of her.

Getting closer to the mirror, she eyes the way her hair is unkempt, flyaway bits adorn her face, almost lining it, even though it’s all tied up in a tight bun. Not red, but brown this week. Clint had commented and pouted that he missed her hair, Steve reported that he was going to go blonde and Tony called her chameleon. She likes her brown hair, so different to her natural colour.

Next, she looks at her eyes.

Green watches her.

The speckled brown seemingly more, when contrasted with her brown hair.

She likes the way her pupils are wide as she changes her expression with the move of an eyebrow.

Natasha used to do this in the Red Room, practice facial expressions so she could school her face, remember how to look angry, sad, happy.

She touches the scar on her lip softly.

No make up.

She didn’t need it for the fight she fought.

Pale skin, blemish on her chin.

The bruises from the fight coming through slowly.

Since when did she stop wearing makeup daily just to hide who she was? She thinks it’s been months. Only wearing it when needed, when meeting with higher ups.

Here though; she doesn’t need it.

She’s Natasha. Not made up, not fake.

She touches her lips again, swollen, cut.

Pushes it into a smile, a frown, playing with pushing them in and out, watching how the cut expands and shrinks depending on her how she curls it.

The elevator stops, the doors don’t open.

Turning and glancing at doors, she realises Jarvis has recognised she’s entranced.

They’d call it vanity, she’d call it a luxury.

“Thanks,” she whispers, and turns her attention back to herself.

Eyebrows, up and down.

Frown, practicing facial expressions; she feels like a marionette.

Eyes big, eyes small. Sad. Happy.

It’s what it looks like on other people anyway.

She can fake any emotion.

She can pretend.

She’s been doing it all her life.

It doesn’t take much practice.

Being unmasked does.

Years of it.

Sometimes she feels like she’ll never be able to fully unmask and be herself.

Natasha knows the lengths she’s gone to, to hide who she is. Being vulnerable is too hard, rarely worth it.

The select few that know her know her like this, feral, unkempt, truthful.

The more she stares, the more she likes this version of herself.

“Thanks,” she tells empty space around her, “we can go now.”

The elevator starts, and delivers her to the floor with her room.

Natasha takes one last look at herself, smiles, and leaves.

5/ Norway

Natasha feels the artificial lighting; her head hurting due to the lack of sleep and constant vigilance.

The phone, now sans the SIM card, sits on the sink, and she stares heavily, taking in every part of her.

So tired of running, missing the stability she’s had.

Weak, she calls herself.

How could she forget the trials and lessons of her childhood?

She should have known that it would inevitably fall apart.

It was always going to end like this, with her alone, and being tracked by people she once considered allies.

“Once a traitor, always a traitor,” Rumlow had once whispered in her ear, and she’d tried to not take it to heart.

The thing is, she’d always known, she only needed to stay true to herself.

Her own morals.

She’d once told Clint that that only person she could trust was herself.

He’s told her that he wished she’d change her mind on that.

Perhaps for a time she did.

Maybe at the tower; maybe for that short period of her life where Tony showed her tech, Steve showed her how to draw and Bruce taught her how to cook. Times that seemed much simpler.

Now.

That’s gone.

The only person you can trust is yourself, she scalds herself, frowning in the mirror.

The mirror doesn’t lie.

The mirror holds truth.

Reaching out for herself she touches it gently.

She is real and not alone.

She has herself, and she knows the power of that.

#bwfest2023 #natasha romanoff #black widow #my fic #heed warnings #black widow fic #Natasha Romanoff fanfic #natasha romanoff fic #red room #Natasha Romanoff x #clint barton #black widow movie #alexei shotstakov #the avengers

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scarfacemarston · 9 months

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For the winter otp questions, could you do Yelena? I thought of her when I saw them. Don't know who to pair her with though! ☺️ Just pictured her all wintered up. Maybe some gen with Natasha? All the numbers if that's not too much? 👉👈 They're all so cute.

Is it this one that you're talking about? I have two Christmas prompts. I can't help in terms of shipping, but I was thinking Natasha and Yelena as sisters. This is in a verse where Natasha lives, because she deserved better.

Holly: Will you include the mistletoe tradition in your works? Do your characters participate? Have you ever celebrated this tradition in your own home? Yelena and Natasha refuse to do mistletoe in their own homes. The Avengers compound had one, but it caused too much controversy. Tony insists they stay at his parties, though. Melina and Alexei have one in the threshold of their bedroom where the girls will absolutely not go in and Melina and Alexei get their kisses anyway. If Natasha is dating someone, she MIGHT tolerate a mistletoe. Yelena will not.

Peppermint: Thoughts and opinions on ugly Christmas sweaters? Yelena: It takes some time because Yelena finds they clash with her fashion style - she's the more fashion conscious between her and Nat, but later on? Yelena LOVES them and can't get enough of them. She just had to find the right one to be interested. Natasha: Natasha might find an ironic one or one that is more of a meme. Not like a cat pics meme but a meme of the avengers that she's decided to adopt as her own. However, there is nothing too crazy with her. It's not her thing.

Chocolate: Reaction to the first snow of the year. It's meh for them. They grew up in Russia. They acknowledge it can sometimes be beautiful, but Natasha thinks of all the sludge that comes with it. Yelena finds it more beautiful that Nat, but only when it's the big fluffy snow which she does not see very often.

Tree: Who convinces who to get a real tree this year? Natasha is the one who convinces Yelena. Yelena is very environmentally conscious, while Nat is as well, Yelena tends to take it more seriously. They debate what is truly more "Green" (get it?)However, after rock, paper, scissors, Natasha wins and they find a real tree - which Tony volunteers to laser cut it while Steve volunteered to cut for them. They politely refused.

Apple: Something you’re characters like to do as a couple/group. Yelena likes selfies/family pictures. She can't help it. She wants to make up for lost time and make as many memories as she can. The pictures make these memories more tangible and despite the pictures of the past being fake, she still enjoyed the memories of taking those pictures. She also loves playing tourist and taking Natasha or Kate with her. Natasha loves trying new cafes and restaurants, but also cooking for others. She has a special fondness for domesticity. She's not entirely sure why, but she thinks it's because it can be a form of peace from her busy hectic life. Melina approves because, "Cooking is just chemistry". Gift: Who has been waiting all year to give their gift to another person? How long have they planned it? Both girls do. Natasha is a strategist and planner. She naturally and selflessly has always put a lot of time and effort into caring for others and finding out what they truly enjoy. Natasha is the type of girl who finds the most obscure thing on Ebay and gifts it to you...but she'd rather hunt it down for herself like a scavenger hunt. The more obscure, the better. Yelena WANTS to do the same, but realizes she's not as good at it or patient as Natasha. She tries to make something instead...only for it to go wrong. Knitting goes wrong, crotchet goes wrong...but metal working? Goes quite well and she will make either a weapon, something useful, or a decorative sculpture. (Please let me have welder or blacksmith Yelena.)

Cinnamon: Favorite festive drink. Natasha: Mulled Wine Yelena: Hot chocolate with vodka and cinnamon to spice it up. Mug: Do they have a cheesy cup they use specifically for the holidays? Natasha: Yes, actually. Clint's kids gave her a mug in the shape of a snowman. Yelena does not have one...yet. Kate is on a secret mission to find the perfect one for Yelena.

Cider: Something they’re worried about during this time of the year. Natasha worries about Steve. She knows she shouldn't. She knows he's an adult, but she still knows what it means to be alone. Luckily, Bucky is with him this Christmas and she worries a little less. She also hopes that things stay quiet for once in her life. Yelena is worried about what sort of memories she'll unlock if she visits Melina and Alexei. She had some pleasant memories during her time in Ohio, but sometimes, remembering these memories can be painful for her.

Eggnog: Favorite winter activity. Natasha: Ice skating and sitting by the yule log. She loved athletics and then warming up all nice and cozy warming up with hot tea. Yelena: Snow sledding! The girl is chaotic energy and loves having fun. She has to release that energy somehow. She doesn't mind getting messy, either. If she can trip Natasha or Kate to fall into the sled, even better.

Turkey: How are they coping this year? Is this time of the year hard for them? I hc that Natasha has S.A.D. disorder, sometimes. I also believe it's possible for the Widows to be especially busy around Christmas as with so many formal events, it would be the perfect time to eliminate certain marks. Sometimes, she broods - with good reason. Yelena didn't remember her past Christmases to know to miss it. She vaguely remembers the ones in Ohio and those were happy times for her. Other than that, no.

Fuzzy socks: Favorite chill hangout activity (OTP or group activity)? Natasha loves movies while Yelena loves board games. She fully takes advantage of game nights whether it's with Melina and Alexei, Kate and Clint's family, or with the Avengers. She swears she doesn't cheat. As you can imagine, this does not stay a "chill" activity for long.

Blankets: Do they prefer to leave the house or stay inside during the winter. Both women were trained to tolerate the weather no matter what. The cold doesn't bother them so much. Nat is always working so she hardly thinks about the cold. However, she does enjoy her time alone indoors. Yelena loves being outside, but sometimes, there is such a thing as being too cold.

Christmas lights: How much do they decorate the house? Yelena loves to raid Target and especially loves the Featherly Friends bird collection as well as knit blankets, twinkling lights and candles with just a hint of tinsel. She learned the hard way that it gets EVERYWHERE. Natasha doesn't really decorate. She still has the mentality that she shouldn't become accustomed to living in one place for too long. However, Steve has painted her a winter scene, The Barton children have gifted her crafts, which she has displayed on her fridge as well as a few gifts from Tony, Thor, Bruce and Wanda over the years. However, she still keeps it minimal.

Family: Do they have family they’re going to see? It depends, sometimes it's the Avengers - with Natasha being closer to some more than others. Sometimes, it's Yelena visiting Kate before she and Natasha have a quiet Christmas together. Sometimes, it's Natasha with the Bartons, or it's with Melina and Alexei

Snow: What are they naming their first snowman of the year? Natasha thinks it's stupid and won't do it. Okay, fine, she'll do it for Clint's children. They name it Fred. Yelena names hers Rodney.

Tradition: What are their yearly traditions? Natasha remembers watching the Nutcracker ballet on tape or if they were especially fortunate, seeing it in person. She has a complicated history with ballet, but she's always loved the Nutcracker. Yelena, meanwhile, wants to eat Russian teacake cookies. Notice I said eat, not bake.

Pine Needle: What are they doing on Christmas Eve? Well, Hawkeye showed that it could be better. However, this is a "She lives" Au. Usually, they are with the Avengers, their "parents", hanging with each other, or Yelena will make a point to visit Kate. Honestly, Yelena makes it a tradition to visit or leave some sort of hidden message or note for Kate each year in remembrance of their first meeting. Yelena wants to go out and see the lights whereas Nat has to be dragged out. Once she's in her comfy PJ's and bathrobe - there is no moving. Sorry, Yelena, those puppy eyes won't work.

Ornament: What are they doing on Christmas Morning? Natasha would like to sleep in, but she knows that her body isn't going to let her. Too many years of training, regulation and routine. Yelena is in the same position, but she will take back her sleep schedule, thank you very much. Then the girls have pancakes, before going to Melina and Alexei's house if they were not sleeping over already. There, Melina makes a huge traditional Russian feast which she most certainly expects the girls to assist...Alexei goes and naps. Then they open gifts, Alexei sings songs and tell stories before Yelena insists they watch an American Christmas movie because she finds them hilarious. However, Natasha also loves spending time with the Avengers, especially Steve since he doesn't have family at this time. Sometimes, if she's in the States, she'll have a small family dinner with Steve, Clint, and some years Wanda while they show Steve It's A Wonderful Life. He, in turn, wants to watch Christmas films from his era including The Shop Around the Corner and Holiday Inn.

#yelena belova #natasha romanoff #melina vostokoff #alexei shostakov #clint barton #kate bishop #steve rogers #wanda maximoff #tony stark #lila barton #cooper barton #nathaniel barton #laura barton

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eliah · 1 year

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#the avengers (1963)#avengers #marvel comics #roy thomas #john buscema #hawkeye #clint barton #red guardian #alexei alanovich shostakov #black widow #natasha romanova

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wheelsup-sevenup · 2 years

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she is gone.

he says it with hands uncharacteristically shaky, a paper clutched in his hands.

she looks immediately to her mother, her heart leaping into her throat and staying there. please, don’t let it be true.

there are tears in her eyes.

why isn’t anyone telling her it isn’t true, she thinks. avengers don’t just die like that.

she is gone.

they have killed her.

yelena is filled with a blind rage as she prepares for her mission. knives slip into sleeves and guns find their places in holsters. the usual pre-mission anxiety is gone. she is furious.

clint.

the man from the stories, of the pizza and lost hearing aids and promises uttered under moonlight.

she can’t believe he let her die.

she is gone.

she whispers to a god she doesn’t believe in, tears leaking onto her pillow.

she did not deserve this, she tells the night air. she was good. she was strong. and good, strong people don’t just leave people who need them.

she deserved the world, she says.

i’ll do anything to see her again.

she is gone.

it’s only now starting to sink in as captain america, sam she remembers his name is, leads yelena down the hallway, to a room filled with items, all neatly folded and placed.

“we saved as much of it as we could.”

yelena nods mutely, fingers drifting lightly over sweaters with frayed sleeves, slightly scorched paperbacks, dvds with cracks in the cases, a stack of singed polaroids. aside from a photo strip taken a lifetime ago, this is all that remains of her sister.

“take your time,” sam says gently, shutting the door behind him.

only then does she begin to cry.

she is gone.

it’s beginning to hurt less.

#i haven’t posted nat in a while so here take this drabble from literally an entire year (and change) ago #natasha romanoff #yelena belova #alexei shostakov #melina vostokoff #widow fam #sam wilson #clint barton #not me writing endgame compliant 😔

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shield-o-futuro · 2 years

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Alec você conhece o Yaqub e a Jackie?

Alexei: De novo, são duas pessoas das quais eu já ouvi falar, mas que não conheci pessoalmente. Quem sabe da próxima né?

#alexei barton

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waltermis · 1 year

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Imagine You Joining The Avengers And Natasha Having A Huge Crush On You

MASTERLIST ↠ NATASHA ROMANOFF MASTERLIST

Summary: Basically the title 🤪

Warnings: swearing, implied sex

↠↠↠

EARLY STAGES

- When you first join the avengers, Natasha would be apprehensive around you

- You think that it's because you're the new girl

- You try to be as nice as possible to her

- Leaving her a protein shake after her workouts

- Making sure that her peanut butter sandwiches didn't have any crusts

- and that every single part of the bread was smeared with peanut butter

- Bringing her favorite snacks & drinks to her door when she had a huge workload

- You didn't know why you wanted to do those things

- but you saw how her eyes lit up whenever she found something you left for her

- and it made you feel happy

- Whenever you smiled at her, Natasha could feel her entire body heat up as she blushed bright red

- The team OBVIOUSLY took note of that and would tease her constantly

- One very terrible teasing session caused someone from the team to go the med bay

- Not gonna name who...

- *cough* Tony *cough*

- It was after a huge party that Tony threw did Natasha finally open up to you

- You had inadvertently saved her from a very drunk and extremely creepy douchebag who couldn't take no for an answer

- After you pulled her away, the two of you stayed at the bar while you threw every pick up line imaginable at her

- and each time, she would throw her head back, squeezing her eyes shut as she laughed

- "Excuse me.... But did you come from the vending machine? 'Cause you are a snack!" ~Y/N

- "Oh god! That's terrible!!" ~ Nat

- "Right?! I don't get how guys think that'll work?!" ~Y/N

- "Did you just come out of the oven? 'Cause you're hot!" ~Y/N

- *gagging noises* ~ Nat

- "You're definitely on my To-Do list tonight..." ~Y/N

- "Ew..... Do another one..." ~ Nat

- and by the end of the night, the two of you were wheezing al the laughing

- After that, the two of you became attached to the hip

- Whenever someone from the team couldn't find you, they would look for Natasha and vice versa

- One time, Steve had found both you and Nat hanging upside down from a tree while you taught her how to play 'Patty Cake'

- Another time, Wanda found the two of you reading each other's' favorite stories just so you could fully understand what the other was talking about

REALIZING

- It wasn't until much later on in your friendship –8 months– with Natasha, did she finally understand why her heart would beat faster whenever you were in the same room as her

- Or why she felt angry whenever you went out with someone that wasn't her

- Or why sometimes she would have to physically restrain herself from wanting to kiss your pout when she rejected watching a rom-com

- It finally dawned on her after she spoke with Clint

- *cough* more like Clint slapped some sense into her *cough*

- "Clint! I think I might be sick..." ~ Nat

- "What?! Why?" ~ Clint

- "I dunno... My stomach gets twisted into knots and my heart beats really fast sometimes..." ~ Nat

- "Lemme ask you, does this all happen when Y/N is around?" ~ Clint

- "Yeah why? *gasp* You don't think she's drugging me do you?!" ~ Nat

- "N-no... I don't think that our sweet little avenger would be drugging you...." ~ Clint

- "Then what is it??!!?!" ~ Nat

- "How are you such a good spy and yet so oblivious and naïve when it comes to feelings?" ~ Clint

- "Wha-?" ~ Nat

- "You have a crush on N/N, dumb dumb!!!" ~ Clint

- "What?! No I don't!!" ~ Nat

- "You said that she had the breasts of a Greek goddess!" ~ Clint

- "What!? When???"

*flashback*

- When the team first began discussing whether they should accept you into the avengers or not

- Natasha may have let something slip

- "C'mon!! She can't join us!!!" ~ Tony

- "Why not, Tony?" ~ Steve

- "Are you kidding me?! That woman has the nose of a bloodhound!" ~ Tony

- "And the breasts of a Greek goddess..." ~ Nat

- "...Nat...?" ~ Clint *end flashback*

- "Oh my god!!" ~ Nat

AVOIDANCE

- After finding out, Natasha avoids you as much as she can

- You're confused thinking you did something wrong

- Every time you would enter a room, Natasha would flee immediately

- the only thing convincing you that you didn't imagine her would whatever she had left behind when fleeing

CONFRONTATION

- It took weeks before you were able to corner Natasha

- She had been taking a shower when you quite literally barged into her bathroom

- You didn't care anymore

- You had waited long enough

- You pushed her against the wall, still fully clothed questioning her

- "Why are you avoiding me?!" ~Y/N

- "W-what the fuck are you doing in here?!?! I'm taking a shower!" ~ Nat

- "Well, you have been avoiding me for practically 2 months now!!! I wanna know what I did wrong!!" ~Y/N

- "You mean besides coming here while I'm showering?!?!" ~ Nat

- "Nat please! I miss cuddling together under a fort we made during movie nights!! I miss 3am baking!! I miss complaining about every dumb move the Kardashians make! I miss our friendship!" ~Y/N

- "That's just it!! I don't want to be just friends!!" ~ Nat

- "W-what?" ~Y/N

- "I lo- like you!!! A lot... and I can't stand being just friends with you!!!" ~ Nat

- "I love you too, Nat...." ~Y/N

- "You do...?" ~ Nat

- She would have the most vulnerable look in her eyes

- her eyes would be glassy with tears as her bottom lip trembled slightly

- "Yeah... I was terrified that I was the only one..." ~Y/N

- You would lean in slightly when you'd stop

- "Can I kiss you?" ~Y/N

- "Yeah..." ~ Nat

- Consent = 🥵🥵

- The two of you would spend hours in the shower...

- 😉😉😏😏

AFTERMATH

- Natasha would be the best girlfriend

- Peppering your face with kisses every morning to wake you up

- Bringing you, your favorite flowers whenever you two had a date

- which was every week

- Reading you stories like 'Little Women' when you couldn't sleep

- Her calling you Russian pet names will never fail to make you blush

- "Morning, moya lyubov'! Did you sleep well?" ~ Nat

- "Thank you, detka!" ~ Nat

- "Ya tebya lyublyu, dorogoy..." ~ Nat

- And in turn you were just as good as a girlfriend to her

- Comforting her whenever she would have a nightmare about her past

- Sitting next to her in the shower, the both of you fully clothed, when a mission goes sideways and agents had died

- "It's all my fault..." ~ Nat

- "No it's not" ~Y/N

- "It is!! I was in charge! And I let them die..." ~ Nat

- "Babe, you did everything you could. The intel you got from the mission was clearly altered and it was a trap! You brought back as many people as you could and you saved over 20 kids from getting trafficked! That's a huge win. And yeah, it sucks that agents died, but I know that they would be proud that they sacrificed their lives so that those kids will have a better life! You're not gonna feel better sitting here feeling sorry, you have to honor what those agents did and thank them." ~Y/N

- "I love you so much, detka. Thank you for being here." ~ Nat

- "'Course... where else would I be? And I love you so much too." ~Y/N

- Reassuring her that she had wiped her ledger squeaky clean

- Of course she still had her moments of doubt but you were always there guiding her through it

- Learning Russian so the two of you could have full on conversations without the team understanding a single word

MEETING THE WIDOW FAM

- Meeting Yelena for the first and getting along amazingly

- the two of you would be working together to prank everybody

- like one time, the two of you painted all of Tony's Iron Man suits Captain America colors

- Or another time where you wrapped Sam's room in saran wrap

- took him nearly 4 hours just to cut through everything you guys wrapped

- When you met Melina and Alexei, the two were cautious around you

- but they soon opened up to you when they realized that you weren't gonna harm them

- Exchanging recipes with Melina

- Drinking contests with Alexei which left you drunk as hell and regretting your life decision the next morning

- It was safe to say that Natasha was head over heels for you

- and you for her

- And that was all that mattered to anybody

↠↠↠

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burningfudge · 6 months

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Lmfao this is so funny.

Alexei: Oh, you’re not a traitor? You can be my wife again!

Natasha: Sure, whatever. What are those submarine plans?

She’s acting as a double agent and pretending to spy on SHIELD/America when she’s actually spying on the USSR. Those dumbasses decided to use a lie detector test as if she wouldn’t be able to get past it 😂

“What does one life matter, my darling…if the world is safe?”

That’s so Natasha, I love it. This was in her early appearances so she’s nearly an entirely different character today than she was in the 60s, but I think that line encompasses everything about who Natasha is.

Avengers (1963) #44

#natasha romanoff #alexei shostakov #clint barton #black widow #red guardian #hawkeye #marvel comics #avengers comics #avengers 1963 #616 natasha romanoff

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marvelgril · 5 days

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sycamorelibrary754 · 10 months

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Happy Thanksgiving

Summary: You invite Natasha’s family to join you for Thanksgiving. Holiday cheer and a surprise awaits!

Genre: Fluff

Pairings: Natasha Romanoff x reader, Yelena Belova x reader (platonic), Alexei Alanovich Shostakov x reader (platonic) Melina Vostokoff x reader (platonic)

Word Count: 3.6k

Warnings: None

A/N: This was a fun one. Happy Thanksgiving!

When you first broached the subject with Natasha of inviting Yelena, Melina, and Alexi to your home for Thanksgiving, you weren’t sure how your wife would respond. True, things were better. Their relationship had gone through something of a healing process since they took down Dreykov and the Red Room together, but her family was still a lot to handle. Most of the team was going to Iowa to spend Thanksgiving with the Barton’s. Clint had gotten it into his head to deep fry the turkey this year. It was going to be can’t-miss-entertainment according to Sam. However, you and Natasha were looking forward to a more intimate holiday.

“You really want my family to join us for Thanksgiving?” Her eyes met yours as you snuggled up on the couch together.

“I think it could be really fun. Plus, you deserve to spend quality time with them that doesn’t involve death, destruction, or pigs,” you joked.

“You don’t like mom’s pigs?” She smirked.

No, love. I do. They’re adorable. Especially once Yelena made them those personalized piggy vests,” you giggled.

“Oh, yeah… Pests!” Natasha laughed recalling the image.

“So what do you think? A Romanoff family Thanksgiving?”

She thought for a moment before a smile reached her lips. “Okay, let’s do it. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I think it could be fun,” caressing your cheek softly.

You went into planning mode upon receiving Nat’s approval and confirmation that all three were available and would be there with bells on. You were determined to make it a memorable holiday for everyone.

*^~^*

You left early to hit the grocery store the Monday before Thanksgiving. It was crucial to avoiding the out-of-stock items and the rush of “fucking annoying slowpokes who don’t know a shallot from an onion,” you eloquently informed your wife after wiggling out of her warm hold.

Nat mumbled something akin to, “See you later, detka,” her head buried in her pillow as you hurriedly put on your coat, scarf, and beanie and rushed out of the house. Your car keys and shopping list clenched purposefully in your fist.

*^~^*

The front door slammed shut a couple of hours later, alerting Natasha to your arrival.

“I’m home, love!” You called out.

“The conquering shopper has returned! How was the store?” Looking around at the mountain of groceries cluttered around you like presents under the Christmas tree.

“It was good! I managed to get everything on the list,” removing your warm attire and running your hand smoothly through your hair.

“I can see that, y/n. Did you leave anything for the other shoppers?” Nat smirked.

“This is all necessary for the traditional Thanksgiving feast I have planned for us,” you explained. “Your family has never had an American Thanksgiving, so I thought, why not go all out?”

Your wife stepped carefully around your grocery maze and wrapped her arms lovingly around your neck. “Have I told you how much I love you?”

“Not in the last twenty minutes,” jokingly glancing at the imaginary watch on your wrist before planting a tender kiss on her lips.

Natasha offered to unpack the groceries for you. Meanwhile, you set about creating a cooking timeline for the meal preparation. You were so in your element your wife couldn’t help but smile. As you typed away on your laptop, your adorable expression reminded her of your demeanor in the field. You were focused, engaged, and confident.

*^~^*

A creature of habit, Natasha awoke the following morning for her daily run. She groggily reached over to turn off her alarm until she realized the alarm hadn’t gone off. No, the clanging of pots and pans from the kitchen tore her from her blissful sleep. Nat rolled over to your side of the bed only to find it empty. She groaned softly and sat up, cracking her neck and stretching her arms over her head as a yawn escaped her lips.

Natasha padded down the hall toward the kitchen, still clad in her pajamas and the fuzzy socks you bought her. She turned the corner to find you floating around the kitchen in a whirlwind—dishes in the oven and stove.

“Moya lyubov? You’re already in the kitchen?” Rubbing the sleep from her eyes.

“No rest for the wary, sweetheart. I’ve got to get the pumpkin pie out of the way so I can get started on the sides by this afternoon,” you explained, fervently whisking your pumpkin puree into your custard mixture. You glanced around the counter like you were looking for something. “Oh, can you hand me those spice jars behind you?”

She picked up the cinnamon, nutmeg, and ginger, stacking them precariously on top of one another like blocks before appearing at your side.

“Nicely done. You missed your calling as a professional Jenga player.”

“Take your damned spices,” she snarked.

You sprinkled the spice mixture into the filling and let it sit. “Okay,” you said, wiping your brow. “I just need to grab the pie crust out of the oven. It should be par-baked by now.”

“I got it, detka,” pulling on the oven mitts and removing the pan from the oven.

Perfect, now we’re just going to fill the crust,” carefully pouring the custard filling. “Then this is going back in the oven at 325 for 45-60 minutes.”

Nat carefully placed the pie back in the oven. “Shall I close, doctor?”

“Please,” in your most professional voice before lapsing into giggles.

“Now, that’s in. We can get started on the sides. Mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, stuffing, cranberry feta salad,” you listed.

Two types of potatoes?”

“Oh, it’s a must, love! You get both the salty and the sweet. It’s potato perfection.”

“Hmm, just like you,” she said suggestively.

“Smooth,” you replied.

“I try," putting her arm around your shoulder.

*^~^*

You were still in the kitchen when Natasha returned from her run.

“Have you taken a break at all since I left?” She removed her running shoes and placed them by the front door.

“No time for breaks. Your sister just texted me and asked if Mac and Cheese was part of the American Thanksgiving tradition, so I’m whipping up one for her.”

Your wife rolled her eyes. “For God’s sake, that’s not necessary, malyshka. Yelena will survive one meal without her precious Mac and Cheese.”

“It’s no problem. I want your family to feel comfortable! That’s why I also have a sparkling Vodka cocktail planned,” you winked.

“That is so sweet, but there is no need to stress over it, y/n. They are going to love it no matter what you make. Plus, you know if you feed them this well, they’ll never leave, right?”

“Wouldn’t that be wonderful?” You joked.

“No, it wouldn’t,” she deadpanned.

The rest of the afternoon was spent preparing the stuffing, cranberry sauce, garlic green beanies, and gravy. By the time you finally laid down on the couch Tuesday evening, still in your apron, you were pleased with your progress. Your legs lay across Natasha’s lap while she massaged your aching feet. She wasn’t surprised to look over and find you sound asleep five minutes later as the television glow illuminated your features. Your wife could only smile at your sleepy form before gently picking you up and carrying you to bed.

*^~^*

Wednesday morning Natasha decided to let you sleep in, so she made the executive decision to turn your alarm off. Truthfully, she felt guilty for how hard you had been pushing yourself this week for the sake of her family. Nat was nursing a cup of tea and reading a book in the family room when she heard you down the hall.

“Oh, crap!” You shouted.

“3,2,1…..” Natasha counted down.

“Nat, why didn’t you wake me up!” Throwing on your favorite cardigan as you entered the room. “I’ve still got to make the pretzel bread and raspberry jello today.”

“You needed the sleep. I can’t tell you’re exhausted, and you were sleeping so soundly when I got up.”

You had a look of panic in your eyes.

“It’s okay, y/n. I found the jello and bread recipes on the table and got the jump on it for you. The jello is done and in the fridge, and the bread dough is under the towel rising.”

You blinked a couple of times as if she was speaking Latin. “You cooked?”

“Are you questioning my abilities?” Raising an eyebrow.

“Well.… yeah? I love you, sweetheart, but the only thing I’ve ever seen you make is a peanut butter sandwich.”

“See for yourself,” smiling proudly and removing her reading glasses.

Opening the fridge, you were pleasantly surprised to find a gelatinous raspberry jello staring back at you. You then peeked under the towel on the counter to find the bread dough had just about doubled in size.

“Well, turn me upside down and paint me blue!”

“Hmmm, tempting, but let’s save that for after my family leaves,” Natasha smirked as she kissed the side of your temple from behind.

“This is awesome, my love. Thank you so much,” turning around in her hold. “I have to say, the thought of the Black Widow cooking Thanksgiving dinner is incredibly sexy.”

“Is it now?” She said, wiggling her eyebrows.

“Very, I may have to get you your apron,” you teased as Natasha gently grasped your ear lobe between her teeth before placing soft kisses down your neck. Her phone dinged with a text notification on the counter beside you a few moments later. You glanced down at the screen out of the corner of your eye.

“It’s Yelena, sweetheart...”

“Is she on fire? Otherwise, I’m not stopping.” Moving the tender kisses to your lips.

“No, she wants to know if she should bring anything,” you replied between kisses.

She feels terrible we’re doing all the work,”

“She’s bringing our parents, that’s a shit ton of work.”

“Ain’t that the truth.”

*^~^*

The next day, you and Natasha got started on the crown jewel of your Thanksgiving dinner: the turkey. After letting it thaw in the fridge all week, your twenty-pound bird had been marinating in a salt brine for twelve hours. You placed the turkey in the oven at 425 degrees for 35 minutes, which gave you two just enough time to get ready before it needed to be basted.

You heard the doorbell after showering and putting on your best fall colors.

“Baby, they’re here!” you called, opening the door to welcome your guests.

Alexi was sporting a plush turkey hat while Melina held a freshly made appetizer. Standing in front of both of them, Yelena had Fanny at her feet. She quickly stepped inside first with a warm hug and a peck on your cheek.

“Happy Thanksgiving, y/n! Thank you so much for inviting us. “Now,” placing both hands on your shoulders. “Where is the booze? I just had to spend the last 20 minutes in the car alone with them, listening to Alexi ramble on about his stupid hat.”

You point toward the coffee table, holding the sparkling Vodka cocktails as your sister-in-law gives you a cheeky smile. “I love you.”

“Haha!” Alexi exclaimed. Greetings, my wonderful daughter-in-law. I am ready for turkey!” Wrapping you in a giant bear hug.

“Could’ve fooled me, Alexi,” you joked. “Ooh, Melina, what do we have here? It looks delicious.”

“A traditional Russian appetizer, Mushroom Julienne. Mushrooms and onions cooked in cream sauce, cheese, and sour cream.”

“My mouth is already watering. Here, let me take your coats. You can place them on the coffee table,” you offered.

After tending to the coats, you rejoined the group as everyone settled in the family room for appetizers and cocktails. Holiday music played softly in the background, setting the scene perfectly. You sat on the sofa beside your wife while your in-laws treated you to numerous stories of Natasha and Yelena’s all-to-brief childhood in Ohio. Some of which you had yet to hear.

“Y/N, has Natalia told you how she and Yelena used to stay up late on Christmas Eve to try and catch Santa Claus?” Melina asked.

“Now, that was fun. You know, he comes down the chimney, girls. Look out! Where is he? You wait for him, and when the cookies are gone, you see he’s there.” Alexi recalled.

Yelena smiled fondly at the memory while Natasha turned red as Santa’s suit and hid her face in her hands.

“Aww, honey,” rubbing circles on her back. It’s precious! I’m sure you were adorable.”

“As adorable as you can be with bright blue hair. You looked like cotton candy,” Yelena laughed.

Nat threw a pillow across the room, barely missing her sister’s head.

“Ha!! Missed!” Yelena snarked.

“Girls, behave,” Melina ordered.

You couldn’t help but smile at the sisterly teasing and family banter. This was exactly what you were hoping for, and the evening was just getting started.

“Oh, detka, you don’t have a drink yet. Let me get you one,” Natasha offered, standing up, but your hand on her arm stopped her.

“Oh, no thanks, love. I actually need to go check on the turkey.”

“I’ll join you,” Yelena announced. “I want to see this bird you Americans are so crazy about.”

You opened the oven to reveal your delectable 20-pound turkey. “Do you want to brush it with the honey glaze for me, Yelena? I’m going to check on the side dishes.”

“Just call me DaVinci!” She declared.

You turned around to find your sister-in-law had finished the glazing by painting a smiley face on the turkey.

“Wow, I didn’t know our turkey had such a charming smile,” you joked. Reducing the heat to 325 and setting the timer for another 75 minutes.

“Thank you again for including us today, y/n. While it would’ve been fun to watch Barton sear his eyebrows off trying to deep-fry a turkey, it's been nice to see Natasha so happy. We didn’t have any family holidays growing up. Not real ones, anyway.”

“Well, you always will now,” placing an arm around her shoulder. “I will spend the rest of my life trying to make your sister happy. That’s a promise.”

*^~^*

While the turkey finished cooking, you decided to share as many of your Thanksgiving traditions as possible. You watched the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade, took in some Turkey Day football, and even played a rousing game of Pictionary.

“What the hell is that?” Yelena shouted as Nat was diligently engaged in her drawing.

“Oooh! Ooh! A ladybug doing the Macarena!”You screamed just before the timer ran out.

“Yes!” Nat shouted.

“Unbelievable, what is that? Five in a row,” Melina remarked. No wonder you two are such a good team.”

“Well, it's no surprise you're a pro at Pictionary. Who needs talent when you can just doodle like a 5-year-old?” Yelena retorted.

“Don’t hate the player, hate the game, Lena,” dropping the marker like a microphone.

“Trust me, I do. It will be perfect for when I want to torture Kate Bishop.”

“With that, I think it’s time for dinner,” you announced happily.

*^~^*

It only took a few minutes before your Thanksgiving feast was lovingly displayed on the dining room table. The sight and aroma of the food was a gentle massage to the soul.

“Before we dig in,” holding up your glass for a toast, “I just wanted to say how happy Nat and I are that you could join us today. We love you, and I’m so thankful to be a part of your family.”

Natasha grasped your hand and placed a soft kiss on your knuckles.

“We feel the same way,” Melina concurred.

“Yes, we’re so happy that you and our little Natalia found each other,” Alexi added.

“Yes, y/n is a saint. It’s all very touching. Can I carve the turkey now,” Yelena groaned, holding up a sharpened carving knife.

“You may proceed,” you declared with a Queen’s wave of your hand.

Dishes were passed around the table like musical chairs. Wine filled everyone’s glasses while you opted for your favorite - Martinelli’s Sparkling Cider. You pretended not to notice Yelena sneaking a few scraps to Fanny under the table. The chatter rose and fell, every few moments dispersed with laughter. It was the kind of occasion most aren't aware they're genuinely enjoying yet look back at in warm nostalgia.

After hibernating in your Thanksgiving food comas, you returned to the family room for dessert. You were excited to finally bring out the homemade Pumpkin pie topped with whipped cream.

“Ah, now this is a beautiful pie.” Look at this, girls. I love America, you cannot get this back in St. Petersburg.” Alexi gushed.

“Y/N made it from scratch,” your wife bragged, causing you to blush at the compliment.

“Did y/n also split the atom?” Yelena teased. She earned an eye roll from her older sister. “Could you BE more whipped?”

“No, I honestly don’t think I could,” Natasha looked at you like you had hung the moon and the stars.

*^~^*

As the evening wound down, the hustle and bustle of the past week was starting to catch up to you. Your wife didn’t miss your heavy eyelids or the tiny yawn that escaped your lips as Fanny hopped up on the couch to lay down beside you.

“Well, we should probably get going. Traffic will be annoying when crossing back over the bridge,” your sister-in-law said.

“Before you go, I have gifts for all of you!” You exclaimed, jumping up off the couch.

“You do?”A bewildered expression on Nat’s face.

“I do!” You’re voice trailed away as you padded down the hall toward your bedroom.

Natasha turned around to her family with a shrug of her shoulders. She had no clue what you were talking about. You returned a moment later with small autumn-gold gift bags.

“This is just a little something for each of you,” clasping your hands together in front of your smiling face. Natasha was even more confused when you handed her one as well. “Go on, sweetheart,” you encouraged.

Natasha removed the delicate tissue paper. Her solid and calloused hands met the soft cotton hiding inside. She pulled the gift out and held it up in front of her. A tiny onesie that read “Mommy’s Little Turkey” was staring back at her.

Natasha stared at it speechlessly, wide-eyed. A first for your relationship. Finally, her brain caught up with the moment. “Moya lyubov—what? We—you…you’re pregnant?”

You nodded vigorously, starting to cry. Natasha’s hands cupped your cheeks. Her lips met yours in a heartfelt kiss, not caring that her family was watching. You gently combed your fingers through the hair at the nape of her neck, returning the kiss.

Melina, Alexi, and Yelena held up their onesies to find variations of Natasha’s: Grandma’s Little Turkey, Grandpa’s Little Turkey, and Auntie’s Little Turkey.”

“I knew it!”Yelena shouted.

Melina turned to Natasha and whispered, “You see what can happen when you keep your heart,” holding her lovingly in her arms.

Vashe zdorov'ye! (Cheers) Alexi exclaimed. If it is a boy, you will name him Alexi. It is a strong and honorable name!” Kissing you on both cheeks.

“Oh God,” Yelena muttered under her breath. “For the love of Fanny, please don’t do that,” wrapping her arms around you. “I would love to babysit. I’m looking forward to passing on much to my niece or nephew.”

“Yeah, that’s not terrifying at all,” your wife mumbled in your ear.

The shock was wearing off. Natasha reached down and gently placed her palm on your stomach. You weren’t showing yet, but just knowing that your child was growing inside you awakened a dream that she had put away in the Red Room long ago.

*^~^*

Once her family left, Natasha insisted that she would handle the post-holiday clean-up, confining you to the couch with many pillows and a fluffy blanket. Foreshadowing what was to come for the duration of your pregnancy.

“Sweetheart, those dishes go in the top right cupboard,” directing her from the couch.

“No worries, malyshka. I got it! You take it easy. The baby needs rest after all of this Thanksgiving cheer,” her protective instincts appear.

“The baby is the size of a plum, my love,”

“A very tired plum!”

*^~^*

Thirty minutes later, the kitchen was clean, and you both were ready for a good night’s sleep. You would never admit it to your wife, but boy, were you tired. You donned your coziest pajamas and joined Natasha in bed. Snuggled into the covers, you found comfort and peace in your safe space. Nat rolled over to face you, your foreheads touching in a beautifully intimate gesture of love and affection.

“This has been the best day of my life. Not only did you give my family an amazing Thanksgiving, you gave me a gift I’ll never forget. Though I have to admit now that I know you’re pregnant, I’m replaying the last week in my head in a loop of horrifying anxiety.”

You giggled at her confession, “It’s alright, Nat. I’m ready for a nice long rest, and I just had a check-up with Helen last week.”

“Wait, does the team know?”

“Dear God, no. You think that group can keep a secret?”

“We can tell them at Stark’s Christmas party in a couple of weeks if you’re comfortable with the idea.”

“Perfect. I need time to prepare for the onslaught of attention from our little one’s aunts and uncles.”

Natasha reached over and grabbed your hand. “I love you, y/n. I can’t wait to welcome our little plum into the world,” she smiled.

“I love you too. You are going to be an amazing mother, sweetheart.”

“Happy Thanksgiving, y/n”

“Happy Thanksgiving, Natasha.”

#natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff x reader #Natasha Romanoff and you #black widow #fluff #comfort #yelena boleva #red guardian #melina #the avengers #mcu #white widow #natalia romanova

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arlana-likes-to-write · 7 months

Text

Lightning Bug - Chapter 28

Masterlist

Warnings: usage of a gun (training), fluff, mention of past trauma

Word Count: 3.8k

You tightened the straps on your backpack as you waited for Natasha and Wanda. There was a knot forming in your stomach. They were excited to meet you, but what if you disappointed them? What if they weren’t happy with who you are? “Hey,” Wanda placed her hands on her shoulders. “Breath. Take a few deep breaths for me.” You nodded and did that. “Good,” you turned to face her. “What’s going through your head?” You sighed, biting your lip. “What’s going through your head?” You sighed, biting your head.

“What if they don’t like me?” You whispered. It seemed ridiculous to say out loud. “I’m a little nervous.” Wanda nodded.

“I was too when I first met them,” she pushed some of your hair behind your ear. “They will love you. Just be you.”

“And take everything Alexei says with a grain of salt,” Natasha rushed over to you as the doors opened and the ramp came out. Natasha told you they had to part the jet a little further away from the house because Melina doesn’t want the jet’s engine to scare the animals. You descended the ramp and hoped the walk would calm your anxiety, but it became worse. Each step you took made your heart pound faster and faster.

The property remained you of the Barton’s homestead but more rustic. There was a main house with multiple outdoor buildings. As you got closer, you could smell and hear the pigs. “There they are!” A booming voice echoed through the quiet land. It came from a man with a thick beard wearing overalls.

“Yebat’ (fuck),” Natasha mumbled and pushed you behind her. Your body tensed up as you watched the man run over to the three of you. “Alexei, no,” Natasha warned.

“Natalia, my pride and joy,” he looked at Wanda. “Wanda, hopefully, my soon-to-be daughter-in-law,” you saw the couple in front of you tense up. “Move. I’d like to see moya vnucka (my granddaughter).” You weren’t sure what that word was.

“Not with that energy,” Wanda said. “Bring it down a little, or you’ll scare her off.” The man gasped.

“I would never! I’m her dedushka (grandpa). We are destined to be side by side like in American movies,” you peeked your head from behind the couple and saw a woman walking out of the house. Her black hair was pulled back into a ponytail, and her arms were crossed against her chest. Suddenly, the man’s face was in front of yours.

“Hi,” he said. You yelped and fell to the ground, startled by his sudden appearance. “You’re so small.” He pushed past the couple and grabbed you by the arms, lifting you like you weighed nothing. “I could put you in my pocket.” The man hugged you tight. “I am your dedushka (grandpa). I can not wait to tell you all about my glory days.” The man swayed you from side to side, and your body went tense, frozen. Even Wanda and Natasha’s voice turned to white noise. You felt a pressure building that started in your chest. You had to hold it in; the charge would kill the man holding you.

“Alexei, vinz (down),” a new voice broke through the fog. “She is not a toy.” The man gently set you down, and you were shaky on your legs. The man looked apologetic, scratching the back of his head. You were sure Natasha was asking if you were okay, but your eyes stayed trained on the newest addition to the group. She grabbed hold of your chin, moving your head from side to side. “Alexei’s right. You are too small. Is Natalia not feeding you?”

“Mama,” the read head groaned. “She’s eating.”

“Not enough. Come, I’ll cook you something,” she dragged you towards the house, but you dug your feet into the ground.

“Wait,” your voice shook, and everyone’s eyes trained on you. “I need,” air couldn’t get into your lungs. “Nat,” you gasped. “Help.” Quickly, she opened her bag and pulled out a battery. She placed it in your hands and knelt in front of you. You wanted to yell at her to get back. To run because you were afraid to hurt her, but the words died on your lips. She sensed your hesitation.

“I got you, molniyenosnyy zhuk (lightning bug). Let go,” You slumped against Natasha, and her arms wrapped around you. “That was a big one. Take a minute, okay,” you nodded and focused on Natasha’s hand, rubbing circles on your back.

“Did I hurt anyone?” You whispered.

“No, Wanda pushed Melina and Alexei back with her powers.” Good. That was good. You stood up straighter and saw Natasha smiling at you. She pushed a few strands of your hair stuck to your forehead from sweat. You felt hot and hungry.

“Hi,” Wanda stood next to you, and you rested your head on her chest. “How are you feeling?” You huffed.

“Better,” you admitted. “Sorry, that was embarrassing.”

“I think someone else should apologize,” you turned around to see the duo walk back to you. The woman hit Alexei.

“Sorry about that. I was excited to meet you.” The man’s cheeks were flushed.

“It’s okay,” you smiled. “Hi, by the way.” you waved.

“Melina, Alexei,” Natasha placed a gentle hand on your shoulder. “This is Y/n, our daughter,” your stomach flipped at that. You loved having someone be proud enough of you to call you their daughter.

“It’s nice to meet you,” Melina smiled. “We’ve heard great things about you,” her eyes pointed at you. “I still think you are too small.”

“Mama!”

“They are so cute!” You stood on the wooden pen for the pigs and watched Alexei chase after the piglets. They wanted nothing to do with him. Natasha laughed.

“Come on, Red Guardian! Didn’t you fight Captain America and win? Catching a pig for your vnucka (granddaughter),” you giggled and watched the man’s face twist with determination. You learned vnucka, which is translated to granddaughter, and the Russian words for grandma and grandpa are dedushka and babushka. Alexei was adamant about you calling him Dedushka. Melina shoved three bowls of chowder before she thought you were ready to explore.

“I got one!” A pig was pushed into your arms, and Natasha had to catch you before you fell off the fence.

“Alexei! What have I told you about manhandling my pigs?” You heard Melina call out and missed the murderous glare Natasha sent Alexei, too distracted by the little pig in your arms. It took a while for the creature to settle in your arms, but soon it pushed against your chest for warmth.

“It’s so tiny,” you whispered, so afraid to disturb the little creature in your arms. A weird feeling bloomed in your chest. It was strange how much faith the animal had in you. The pig trusted you to hold it close and protect it. Such blind faith. It was a little ridiculous, but it reminded you of yourself. You put faith in your parents and the man from HYDRA who promised you a better life. Now you were doing it with the Avengers. Was it wise to do it again? The third time is the charm, right? “What’s got you thinking so hard?” Natasha asked, running her hand over your head. You glanced up. She was smiling. Her eyes sparkled with love; sometimes, you forgot how much she cared about you. You smiled.

“Just, uh, thinking about life,” she chuckled, kissing your forehead. You basked in the warmth she provided.

“Never change, dorogoy (sweetheart),” you looked at her confused. “After everything you’ve been through, your heart is still good.” You frowned, unsure if that was true. You protected the pig with one hand as you climbed over the pen and placed the animal on the ground. It looked confused, turned to face, and ran to bury itself between your legs. You chuckled, pushing the creature towards its family. However, the piglet ran back to you.

“What’s going on, little one?” You asked, scratching its chin. “Why don’t you want to join your friends?”

“It’s the runt,” Melina said. You glanced over at her. “The others pick on it.” You frowned and sat down. The piglet climbed onto your lap and looked up at you.

“I was a runt, too,” you spoke softly. Your hand never stopped petting it. “I think we grow up to be the strongest of the group because we have to fight every single day just to survive,” you sighed. “And that can be scary, but I promise little one, everything will turn out just fine.” You felt a little crazy speaking to an animal, but the little pig seemed to understand. It glanced at the other pigs and back to you before joining them. You smiled and stood up. Wanda and Natasha were watching you with a smile. Yeah, everything was turning out just fine.

It was a long day. With the emotional trip to Sokovia and the surprise display of power, Wanda and Y/n were taking a nap before dinner. Alexei was outside finishing the chores he promised Melina that would be done, but due to the excitement, they slipped his mind. So Natasha was left to help prepare dinner with Melina. Sometimes, Natasha had to pinch herself to remind herself this was real. That the woman chose to be here, decided to be her mother, and that the Red Room wasn’t orchestrating this. It’s not another mission. This was real. It took a while for her to trust Melina and Alexei again. Yelena was the critical factor to help mend the relationship. She knew it was Yelena’s desperate attempt to have a real family. “It looks good on you,” Melina said, standing over the sauce for the beef stroganoff. Natasha hummed in question, focusing on chopping up the spices. “Motherhood. You fall into the role naturally.”

“You sound surprised,” she glanced over her shoulder, but Melina’s back was to her.

“Not surprised at all. You are a khameleon (chameleon). You adapt. It was like that in Ohio, the Red Room, and now with the Avengers,” Natasha wasn’t sure if what Melina said was a compliment. She turned to face the older Black Widow, and Melina looked at her. “Why do you look offended?”

“I’m not sure if I should take what you said as a compliment.”

“No?” She tilted her head. “You were always sensitive to that.” Melina walked over to the cutting board she was using and took it back to the pot. “I was trying to say it’s hard for us to be mothers, people like you and me.”

“Why is it hard?” She saw Melina’s stutter as she added the freshly chopped herbs into the pot.

“Because that choice was taken away from us,” Subconsciously, Natasha placed her hand where her scar was. The serum healed all of it, but she would never forget where it was. She dropped her hand when Melina turned back around to hand her the cutting board. “But you are doing good. Does that happen often with her powers?” Natasha shook her head.

“Not since she started training with Maria,” Natasha began cleaning the dishes she no longer needed. The farmhouse needed to be equipped with a dishwasher; she preferred to do it by hand. It kept her busy.

“Is she training to be an Avenger?”

“No, I mean she could join the team if she wants, but we are focusing on helping her control her powers,” Or help her fight this new threat that was possibly coming. She would have a long chat with Vision when she got back.

“Are you and Wanda going to have more children?” Natasha felt her cheeks warm up. “I would like to have more grandchildren to spoil.”

“Mama! We just adopted her. Give us some time.” Melina chuckled and wiped her hands on a dish towel. The gentle hand of Melina on her shoulder caused Natasha’s body to go rigid, but she turned around to face her. The woman places both hands on her cheeks.

“Throughout our entire life, every choice was made for us,” her voice was so soft Natasha had to remind herself who was speaking to her. “But you chose to be that little girl’s mama, and being a mother is the greatest gift. Cherish it.” It was hard for Natasha to look past the betrayal towards Alexei and Melina. Melina was the only mother she knew since the Red Room took her biological one away. Melina was part of the system that kept hundreds of girls trapped even when she was trapped herself.

The sudden moment was interpreted by the crack of a gun going off; the duo separated immediately. “There is a pistol in the umbrella holder by the back door,” Melina said suddenly. She nodded and raced to where Melina told her. It wasn’t surprising to her that weapons were scattered around the house. Once her hand came into contact with the metal, she remembered to take a few calming breaths. The list of enemies was long and still growing. No matter who was here, no one was taking her family from her.

She kicked the back door open and expected to see the backyard filled with enemies racing towards the house or Alexei fighting them off. No. Instead, she saw Alexei and Y/n at the gun range for Widows that stayed on the farm. There was a pistol in the teen’s hand, and the gun going off two more times caused goosebumps to form on her arm.

“Alexei, what the fuck are you doing?”

You spun around to see two very angry Black Widows armed with a pistol and a rifle. Safety placed the gun down like Alexei and Maria showed you, and you ran over to Natasha. “Nat, come look!” It was enough time for her to hand the pistol to Melina before you dragged her over to the makeshift gun range. “Look how well I did!” You were proud of your grouping: two head shots and two in the shot. You looked back at Natasha and your smile. “You look upset.”

“Of course I’m upset. Melina and I thought we were being attacked,” you cringed and glanced at Melina and Alexei. The older woman was radially speaking in Russian and heard the word ‘idiot’ a few times. Suddenly, the back door of the house busted open. Wanda’s eyes were glowing red, and her magic danced on her fingers. It died down when she saw her family and no threat.

“Oh, I’m in so much trouble.” Natasha grabbed your arm and dragged you back over.

“Explain, both of you,” Melina said when Wanda jogged over. You and Alexei shared a look.

“I woke up and heard you and Natasha talking in the kitchen,” you said slowly. “I went outside to explore, and Alexei, I mean dedushka,” you saw his smile from the corner of your eye. “Saw me walking around the training area. He said you made it for the Widows that sometimes stay here,” you knew it had to do with some rehabilitation program Yelena set up, but the details were fuzzy. It took a lot of work to follow any story Alexei told. “I asked him if he could teach me how to shoot a gun.” The two Black Widows said something in Russian that was not part of your daily language lesson, but Alexei cringed. Natasha stared down the man.

“And you thought it was a good idea.”

“Her mama, babushka, and tetya (aunt) are all Black Widows. She should know her way around a gun,” it was a fair agreement to make. “She gave me very good-” he snapped his fingers. “What’s the word? When the eyes get small and sad?”

“Puppy dog eyes,” Wanda said with a smirk. Alexei pointed at the witch. “She tends to use them to get something she wants,” you opened your mouth to argue, but the witch gave you a pointed look. You thought it was best to keep your mouth shut. “I was unaware you had any form of gun training.” She said to Alexei, who gasped in offense.

“I will have you know the Red Guardian is well-versed in many weapons. Guns, knives, rocket launcher,” your eyes widened, and you looked at him, excitement bubbling in your chest. “No!” He shot you down. “Do you see how much trouble we are in?” You slowly looked back at the trio.

“On a scale of 1 -10, how much trouble am I in?” You asked, staring at the ground, unable to look at the three women. Natasha sighed.

“You will be doing dishes for the rest of our trip,” you nodded. That was fair. Gently, Natasha lifted your head, and you stared into her green eyes. “No more weapon training without telling us.”

“Sorry,” you mumbled, but the redhead kissed your forehead and hugged you. She smelt of garlic and onions.

“Scared the hell out of me, kid,” you nodded again. It wasn’t your intention, and you weren’t thinking when you asked Alexei. You felt tears form at the corner of your eyes, and she needed the hug far too soon for your liking. “Let’s see this grouping again.”

“What?” You questioned. Natasha pushed away a tear that escaped down your cheek.

“I’d like to see you shoot again. Make sure Alexei taught you correctly,” the man gasped, and it made you laugh. Before you picked up the gun, you apologized to Melina and hugged Wanda. With the short time you held a gun in your hand and shot it, it wasn’t your preferred weapon. However, with so many Black Widows in your life, you were going to keep that information to yourself.

Once the dishes were cleaned from dinner, it was another early night, but you could not sleep. Your sleep schedule was messed up with the time difference and the nap you took. So you got out of bed and walked out of the guest room. Melina had a bookshelf next to the dining room that you’ve been dying to look through. Many of the books in her collection were not in English, but you could tell they were science books. Your eyes found a photo album. Curiosity, you grabbed the album and flipped through it. Every photo was of two young girls: one blonde and one brunette. The images captured moments from Christmas, Easter, and Thanksgiving. “It’s not a good idea to snoop in a Black Widow’s home,” you jumped at Melina’s voice, almost dropping the album.

“It’s also not a good idea to sneak up on someone.” The Black Widow chuckled, and you put the album away, but Melina grabbed it and walked over to the dining room table. Wordlessly, you followed her and sat down.

“Do you know how I became Natalie’s and Yelena’s mama?”

“Kind of. Yelena said a mission brought all of you together.” Melina nodded; the photo album was stopped on Christmas. “I didn’t ask specifics.”

“The Red Room needed agents to act as an American family to steal some classified information,” she traced the faces of each little girl. “When the mission was over, we gave them back.”

“Why are you telling me this?” You questioned. Melina closed the album and placed her hands on top of it. She was staring intently at you, and you felt small under her gaze.

“I wasn’t the mother my girls needed,” you frowned and took her hand. You flipped it over so you could trace the lines on her palm. Her facial expressions softened at the gesture.

“Are you the mother they deserve now?”

“I do not know,” she admitted. “But I’m trying to be. Not all of us get the chance to get two,” you understood that. You were lucky that you overslept that day, which landed you in the cafe simultaneously. If you were there at your regular time, you could still be living on the streets or bouncing between shelters. What a crazy what-if. “Never take it for granted.”

“I won’t,” you promised. “I don’t think I’ll ever be able to repay them.” Melina smiled softly.

“Love them as much as they love you,” the Black Widow said. “That will be more than enough.”

You were up early to help Melina work outside with the pigs and her small garden. It was hard work, but Melina filled it with stories of their time in Ohio. Even Wanda brought out breakfast and helped out. You told her that the dishes would get done after you helped Melina. You sat back on your knees and stretched your neck. Picking weeds out of the dirt was not your idea of a fun time, but it beat cleaning the pig pen or doing the dishes. The sun felt different out here compared to Iowa and New York. You liked it, and it made you think about what Natasha asked you about - living somewhere like this. Away from the hustle and bustle of the big city. A place where you could get your dog and have them run around the backyard. It was a good idea, maybe one day. “Mama, are you overworking my niece already?” Your head wiped towards the voice. Yelena and Kate were talking in the garden. You jumped to your feet and ran over to them. The couple caught you as you threw yourself at them.

“I didn’t know you were coming to visit!” You smiled.

“That’s because it was a surprise, bud.” Kate laughed.

“Did you think I would subject you to a full day of Alexei’s torment without me?” You giggled. “I heard you got into a little trouble.” You awkwardly shrugged. “Proud of you.”

“Yelena, do not corrupt my granddaughter,” the older Black Widow came over to greet the newcomers. “Kate, how are you? Is Yelena treating you well?” The archer blushed.

“Yes, Melina. I’m doing great.” The blonde’s mouth hung open slightly.

“Come, I’ll make you something.” Melina put her arm around Kate and led her to the house. “Yelena, close your mouth. You’ll eat a fly.” You used your pointer finger to close her mouth, and she slapped your hand away.

“Unbelievable,” Yelena said once her girlfriend and mother were out of earshot. “She likes the people we bring home more than her daughters.” You smiled and lopped your arms through hers. “How do you like Russia?” She asked as you both walked towards the house.

“I like it!” You said. It was the truth. “Just different than Iowa and the city.” Yelena hummed in agreement.

“It took me a while to learn that the differences we see make for a wonderful world.”

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#lightning bug #wandanat x reader #wandanat x you #wandanat x daughter!reader #wandanat x y/n #wandanat #bishlova #melina vostokoff #alexei shostakov

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