Tumgik
#alfred is mr. steal yo girl
hetaliawhatifs · 7 years
Note
Imagine if England and France were both competing with each other for the attention of the same girl only for America to come out of nowhere and literally/metaphorically swept her off her feet. Their reactions? XD
America: “Dudes, I didn’t even realize we were competing.”Alfred would just shrug and laugh as he ran off with his crush. Those two old guys were trying to win? Ha. Fat chance! Alfred would just shake his head as he ran away victorious. If they wanted a chance to beat Alfred at the flirting game, they had better…git gud…
England: “Of course, he not only wins, but shows off while doing so. He gets it from you.”Arthur would roll his eyes and groan. Alfred stole the spotlight, again. He wouldn’t be too upset if Alfred was happy…and Francis did lose…so it could be considered a win. Though he would remember that he has a good book at home to finish…alone…so he would quickly move on from losing out on the crush. However, next time, he would make sure to act fast, so he wouldn’t lose out again.
France: “Mon dieu….I taught him that!”At first….Francis would be a bit heartbroken…and then shocked. Not shocked that Alfred literally swept his crush off their feet..but that he managed to win them over. But, in the end, he’d end up being happy for Alfred and tell him he has good taste; Francis would also take credit for teaching Alfred everything he knows about flirting, since he obviously didn’t learn from Arthur. 
Tumblr media
69 notes · View notes
dato-potato · 5 years
Text
The Lost Son pt. 3
Part three of the AU where Damian is left at an orphanage in Gotham when he’s five.
I’m so sorry this has taken so long! I busted my laptop earlier this week so I was trying to write this on my phone which was just absolutely annoying so I ended up stealing my friend’s laptop. It’s been an interesting week though, been in self-isolation thanks to my compromised immune system, severe asthma and heart condition, so it’s been fun. Anyway, you guys aren’t here for that, so let’s get to the good stuff! I hope you guys enjoy!
Part One
Part Two
Part Four
Part Five
Part Six
Part Seven
Part Eight
——————————
“Is everything ready?” Janet panicked, rearranging the flowers Damian brought home the previous night for the umpteenth time.
Damian placed a hand on her shoulder, “Yes, Janet. Everything is perfect. Why don’t you wait by the door, I’ll triple check the rest of the children.”
Janet pinched Damian’s cheeks in the way she knew he loathed, “What would I do without you?”
Damian shrugged his shoulders and rubbed his now sore cheeks, “Perish, most likely.”
Janet rolled her eyes at him and shooed him away. Damian gathered the kids, smoothing dresses and adjusting clip-on ties. Ideally, he would’ve rathered not have to do this at all, but the orphanage was funded by the man and he couldn’t leave Janet to fend for herself.
There was an excited chatter from the foyer and Damian knew they had arrived. As they rounded the corner he saw Bruce Wayne, an older gentleman following close behind, Timothy, followed by Richard Grayson, the eldest son.
Janet went down the line of children, though there were only five, not including Damian which was considerably less than the amount that had been there when Damian first arrived. 
“And that’s Aurora,” Janet chuckled gently and pointed to the small girl who clutched Damian’s arm, “She nearly never leaves the poor boy alone.”
Janet motioned for Damian to step forward. He sighed but did as he was asked, “Damian Alistair,” he introduced himself and held out his hand. 
Bruce Wayne nodded his head and took his hand, “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Damian.”
“You as well, Mr. Wayne.”
Bruce Wayne threw back his head and laughed, an action that nearly made Damian physically cringe, “Please, just Bruce is fine.”
Damian smiled awkwardly at him knowing he would not call him by first name only. This man made Damian nervous, everything about him seemed so forced and fake, the boy wasn’t sure how to react. 
“Well,” Bruce Wayne started, “I brought some gifts for the kids, I only hope it suits their tastes,” he chuckled.
Janet waved a hand in the air, “I have no doubt they’ll love them,” she looked over at the kids who eagerly awaited the signal that told them it was ok to move. Janet nodded her head and they were off. Bruce Wayne chatted with Janet as the two of them made their way to the door to watch the kids.
Damian smiled and shook his head at the children before turning his attention to the tugging on his sleeve, “What is it, Rory?”
Aurora looked suspiciously at the other three men who stood close by, “Can I go look at the toys?” she asked in a whispered voice.
Damian chuckled, “Of course, little one. You may want to hurry though, the good stuff might be gone.”
Aurora let out a small gasp before bolting to the door.
“You’re pretty good with kids,” Timothy commented as he walked over to Damian.
“You get used to it,” Damian shrugged as he watched the last of Aurora disappear around the corner.
The older Wayne son stepped awkwardly towards the two boys, “So, Timmy. Wanna introduce me to your new friend?”
Smooth, Damian thought to himself, “You must be Richard, I’m Damian Alistair.”
Richard shook Damian’s hand, a pleasant smile on his face. 
Damian sighed, the remaining guests seemed to be waiting for something.
“Would anyone care for something to drink?” Damian asked, attempting to be pleasant or as pleasant as he could manage.
The two Wayne sons and the older gentleman nodded as Damian led them to the dining room. The men sat down, “Tea?” he asked them and they all nodded politely.
Damian left them and began boiling the water. A clatter behind him startled him, something that was quite hard to do.
“Apologies,” the older gentleman said when he saw Damian jump, “I was simply thinking of lending a hand, if that’s all right.”
Damian nodded and thanked him as the man searched for the cups. Damian pointed out the cupboard where they kept the mugs and the man made a sour face at them as he got them out.
“Tea tastes best in the proper wares,” he told the boy.
Damian was quiet for a moment, he didn’t think the man was insulting them for not having teacups but he still felt like he should apologize, “I didn’t know it tasted different.”
“Of course it does, even the smallest change from the wrong temperature, to steeping it too long will affect the taste.”
Damian hummed, “I had no idea, you seem to know a lot.”
The man nodded, “I know what is required to succeed as a butler.”
“I see, so you’re Alfred Pennyworth,” Damian nodded in understanding. 
The man nodded and apologized for not introducing himself earlier as the kettle began to squeal. Damian watched helplessly as Alfred took over, pouring the water, gathering the sugar and milk, leaving Damian to simply carry some mugs out to the room. 
“I see Alfred took over?” Richard mused as Alfred clicked his tongue at him.
Damian chuckled and shook his head, “Not at all, he was a great help. I suppose I don’t know much about making tea.”
Richard chuckled as he scooped some sugar into his cup, “So, Damian, was it?”
The smirk on his face irked Damian but he nodded anyway and sipped his tea. It did taste better than when he usually made it.
“How long have you been here for?” Richard asked.
Damian tilted his head to the side, “Nearly eight years.”
“You must’ve been quite young then,” Alfred mused as he smiled from behind his mug.
“Yeah, I was five,” Damian told them quietly.
Alfred set his mug down, “Forgive my forwardness, but what of your parents?”
Damian looked down at his hands as he felt the family leaned in, didn’t they know where they were? Were they not aware that they were sitting in an orphanage? One that Damian lives in?
Damian sighed, “My mother was the one who left me here, I found out she passed away some time ago,” Timothy flinched slightly at his words as he already knew.
“That’s awful,” Alfred shook his head before pressing on, “And your father?”
Damian shook his head, “I have no clue. My mother used to tell me that she’d tell me when the time was right, but she never got the chance.”
That seemed to be the end of the overly personal questions and Damian would be forever grateful for that. They spent the remaining time chatting idly, which he was surprised he enjoyed so much. Damian felt comfortable with the three others in front of him.
A man wearing sunglasses and a horribly fake mustache entered the dining room, the four at the table turning their attention to him, “Yo, Bruce said it’s about time to go,” he had a large frame, possibly even larger than Bruce Wayne, perhaps he was a bodyguard?
Timothy stood up abruptly, a panicked look on his face as he seemed to be choosing what words to use, “All right, we’ll be right out,” Richard told him
The man in the doorway rolled his eyes, when they landed on Damian, he smirked at the boy before nodding his head at him and ducking out of the room.
Damian turned to Timothy for an explanation, “That was our uh...” he struggled.
“Driver,” Richard offered as he stood up.
Damian nodded his head suspiciously as he led the men out. Alfred turned back to the boy, looking him up and down before smiling once more, “I’d like to invite you to the manor for tea, if you’d accept.”
Damian raised an eyebrow, “Can you do that?”
Alfred scoffed at him, “Young sir, I have most certainly earned the right to invite a guest or two over.”
Damian chuckled at the old man, “Ok, it’d be my honour to accept that invitation then, Mr. Pennyworth.”
Alfred smiled and nodded curtly as he made his way to the car the others waited in.
Later that night as Damian helped Janet washing up after dinner, Janet was still gushing about Bruce Wayne.
“Maybe he’s thinking of adopting again?” Janet continued excitedly, “Maybe he’s thinking about adopting you?”
Damian raised an eyebrow at her, “I sincerely hope not.”
“Why not?”
“The family seems,” Damian paused, considering how best to word it. He nodded, “Completely bat-shit insane.”
Damian was later given a long and arduous lecture for his language. He thought it was clever.
——————————
Bruce pulled his cowl on and turned to Alfred, “I’ll be back, Alfred.”
Alfred nodded, “As always, Master Bruce.”
Bruce pulled himself into the Batmobile, Tim close behind and Nightwing on the comms already, relaying information of a robbery in progress on Fifth street. 
Alfred sighed heavily as the Batmobile sped away, out of the cave. Once he was sure that Bruce was gone, he turned on his heel and headed to the Batcomputer. He sat down in the chair as he had done so many times before, but this time felt different.
He input his access codes and sat for a minute. The child wasn’t even an adult yet, he was fairly certain he wouldn’t find anything that Bruce didn’t already know, but it was worth a shot.
He searched Damian Alistair, the obvious recent kidnapping of Aurora came up, as well as some other minor incidents from before he met Tim and after as well. Nothing huge, but enough to get some attention. 
The boy’s movements were swift, as if he had done them a million times before. Alfred shook his head, “What have you been through, my boy...” he muttered to himself as he watched the footage they had of him. He continued his search, looking at his academic records, nearly flawless, but no clear direction either. No extracurricular activities, outside his family, of course. 
Alfred sighed, rubbing his chin with his hand in thought. He searched Alistair, but nothing pertaining to the boy showed up. He leaned back in the chair, could he be wrong? But he was so sure. All you had to do was look at the boy and you could tell, he looks exactly like his father when he was that age, all except his eyes. Those eyes, Alfred thought, I know them, but from where?
After searching for things that happened eight years ago that might be linked to Damian and running a facial recognition for the boy to see if anything before he came to Gotham cropped up, Alfred gave up searching on the computer. He considered bringing it up to Bruce, but if Bruce hadn’t noticed it already, he’d probably just deny it. Though, he would know best if he had a son out there, right?
Alfred pushed himself up, perhaps some tea would help him think clearly. He checked the time, Bruce would be back soon anyway, he had spent too much time reading about the boy. Alfred began toward the manor when he stopped and turned back to the computer, erasing the history. If Bruce didn’t know already, Alfred would tell him once he was more certain, at least.
——————————
Janet burst through Damian’s door, breathing heavily, “Holy, Janet, knock? Please?”
Janet waved Damian’s complaints away with her hand, “Never mind that, you’ll thank me later.”
She handed a newspaper over to Damian. He set his book down and read the headline, skimming the page for what it was she was trying to show him. 
“The Arts section,” she told him excitedly.
Damian eyed her suspiciously as he flipped and continued to skim. The largest headline read Central City Resident Wins Progressive Young Artists Award, Damian looked up to Janet who was still jittery. He looked back down to skim when he saw the picture and name. His last name was different, but it was certainly him.
“It’s--” Damian began.
“Parker!” Janet finished excited.
Damian looked down at the picture. He had grown, but he looked happy and healthy, his adoptive parents standing proudly behind him. Janet took the paper back carefully, looking at the picture again with a sort of sadness. Damian thought of all the times the small boy had come into his room to draw or watch Damian draw.
Janet looked back at him, “I’m going to put it up on the fridge.”
Damian nodded, handing over the paper, “That’s a good idea.”
He was glad the kid was doing good. He hadn’t checked in on Parker for a while. Damian tried not to check in on the kids too often, he knew it wouldn’t be good for him or for them, but just knowing that they were safe and living well was nice. 
Only a few minutes later, there was a soft tapping on his door as it creaked open. A very tired Aurora shuffled into his room, not waiting for him to answer, “I can’t sleep,” she told him, rubbing her tired eyes.
Damian shook his head, “Can’t sleep or had a nightmare,” he raised an eyebrow.
Aurora hung her head, “Nightmare,” she said, barely above a whisper.
“Come here, little one,” he said shifting the blankets and setting his book on the side table. She shuffled towards him and climbed into his bed, snuggling into his side as he tucked the blanket around her. 
Before he switched the light off, “What were you reading, Dami?”
Damian smiled down at her and picked up his book, “George Orwell, you heard of him?”
Aurora poked her head up to look at the cover, “Nope.”
Damian chuckled and set the book down, “All right, lay down now.”
Aurora began to protest as he switched the light out, “Don’t worry, little one, you know I won’t let the nightmares get you.”
Aurora nodded and buried her face into the blankets and Damian’s side. He held her close, he promised he wouldn’t let anything get her.
——————————
End of Part Three
Sorry it took so long, but I hope you guys enjoyed it! There’s definitely more parts if people want them! 
56 notes · View notes
christopher-bryant · 7 years
Text
alfred pennyworth aka mr. steal yo girl
0 notes