#also alas i still love them a Regular Amount

[mardyart]

new year’s eve hawkins fair and they’re on guard duty together

[violetclarity]

would love to turn off the part of my brain that has one (1) bad date and goes into a funk for several days, thanks

[welcometomyoasis]

Petrichor | Joshua Hong

Synopsis: Joshua Hong has felt inexplicably drawn to you since the first time he saw you. Alas, he was betrothed to another. Against his better judgment, Joshua still allows himself to get close to you. When you start to fall for him too, what happens then?  Pairing: naiad! joshua x human g/n! reader (ft. spirit of opportunity! platonic minghao x reader, cameo by cupid! jeonghan, mention of god of time, chronos! seungcheol) Genre: greek mythology au, ancient athens au, forbidden love, fluff, angst Word count: 26.6k words Warnings: loss of vision, discrimination, greek deities, insecurities, blood, slight profanity, toxic relationship (Joshua’s betrothed is a b*tch), dehumanisation (because of Joshua’s betrothed. She calls him pet), mention of mutilation (again it’s the betrothed) , violence, food, slightly suggestive, fainting and sickness (reader gets sick), nicknames (darling, bunny)  Note: I’m including the preview in this version of the full fic because it flows better. I also apologise in advance if there are any spelling/ grammatical errors.  A/n: Once again, thank you Yena @fairyhaos for inspiring this fic! And a huge thank you to @wonijinjin, @brownsugarbaybee, @wheeboo and @slytherinshua for listening to me ramble about this fic ❤️ I hope I’ve done this trope justice and I’m really sorry for the wait. As always, feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated!! Thank you ❤️

ᨒ Petrichor (noun): the scent of the earth after rain. Some would describe the scent as distinctively earthy, pleasant, and sweet. 

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The situation that Joshua Hong found himself in was one he never expected. The whole thing was ironic really. As a naiad, a water nymph, he knew that mortals, humans specifically, would be inexplicably drawn towards him should they ever lay eyes on him. In fact, much to Joshua’s annoyance, there were several occasions where he had to avoid some rather unsavoury characters. 

Yet this time, the tables were turned. Here Joshua was, crouched behind some foliage near the creek he presided over just so he could observe this one human from afar. There was something about this human that inexplicably drew Joshua towards them. He was completely enamoured and fascinated by everything about them. 

They became a regular sight at the creek over the past few months. Joshua remembered the first time he laid eyes on them. It was a balmy morning in spring. He had just finished his duty of directing some fresh water to a nearby town. When he returned to the creek, the human was there, sitting on a sky blue picnic mat crafting an intricate looking object. He remembered being struck by the sheer brightness in the human’s eyes. Literally and figuratively. Their eyes glistened under the sunlight, reflecting the sparkles from the water’s surface. At the same time, their eyes were full of life. They told Joshua everything about the human’s appreciation for their surroundings, their life, and most of all their determination to live life to the fullest. Joshua was in awe. That was the first time he ever saw such striking eyes. 

Since then, Joshua felt as if there was a magnet pulling him closer to the human. Overtime, Joshua began noticing other details about the human. They would always visit the creek on the weekends, often staying for hours at a time. They would simply sit on the picnic mat reading or making those intricate looking crafts. There were even instances when they would pluck the tiny flowers around the creek to make flower crowns. He even noticed some of the human’s quirks. Like how their eyes would crinkle slightly, or how there would be a ghost of a smile on their face when they read something funny or accomplished something. They would also crinkle their nose and furrow their brows when they were concentrating. One thing Joshua definitely picked up on, was that the human was always alone. This puzzled him immensely. Weren’t humans supposed to be social creatures? 

Eventually, the amount of time Joshua was spending observing the human began to drive him crazy. Sure, he could partially blame the fact that naiads were naturally curious creatures. But he knew that the attraction he felt went beyond the confines of rational curiosity. This was infatuation, obsession even. In Joshua’s attempt to figure out what this attraction was, he approached his acquaintance, a relative of Cupid, Yoon Jeonghan, to ask if he was hit by yet another one of Jeonghan’s infamous stray arrows. To his disappointment, Joshua was not. (Jeonghan adamantly insisted that “using arrows is soooo 2 centuries ago” although he cheekily admitted that he did randomly shoot love arrows into the air “just for the fun of it”.)

Still, Jeonghan did give him a somewhat useful piece of advice. Infatuation. Love. Jeonghan explained that these feelings were complicated. There was usually much more nuance that needed to be teased out when attraction was involved. Especially in this case where the attraction was one-sided (for now anyway). Simply put, Joshua had either really fallen for this human, or there was something about this human that he longed for. Something that sparked an intense sense of desire and curiosity within him, like a personality trait or the human’s way of life. Perhaps it was a bit of both possibilities? 

Whatever it was, Joshua would need to figure that out for himself. Outwardly, Joshua cursed Jeonghan’s advice, thinking that it was just like a relative of Cupid to tell people to keep spying on humans like a creep from the sidelines. However, deep down, he knew Jeonghan was right. His desire, his need to decipher this complex feelings of attraction for the human was overwhelming. That human lit a fire within him, and he needed to quell those flames before it completely consumed his life. 

So, Joshua (rather reluctantly) continued his routine. He hid behind the foliage, and he watched. 

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When you emerged from the shade of the dense forest, the warmth and light of the mid-morning sun welcomed you. Taking a moment to recenter yourself after the somewhat strenuous trek to your destination, you closed your eyes. Reopening your eyes, you were once again greeted with the most picturesque landscape before you. 

Sure, it might seem like another open field of grass next to a creek. A sight that was not uncommon in the rural forested areas surrounding the Athenian capital. But this place was different. There was something about this particular field of grass next to this creek that was absolutely mesmerising. You shouldn’t be surprised. Afterall, the gods lived on Mount Olympus which overlooked Greece. The scenery should be befitting for the gods to lay their eyes upon. Regardless, no matter how many times you visited this place, you were always enthralled by the scenery. 

The field of grass was extremely luscious. You loved to feel the blades of grass brushing against your fingertips. They were soft, almost feathery. Tiny flowers were scattered across the entire field, providing subtle pops of different colours to the otherwise uniform vibrant emerald colour of the grass. You were also treated to the sight of butterflies. Besides the occasional rustling of the foliage, if it was silent enough, you swore that you could almost hear their wings fluttering as they flew across the field towards the mountains that lay in the background. Sometimes, when you arrived early, you would be treated to the sight of the majestic mountains that were shrouded in the morning mist slowly clear, allowing the sun to peak out from between the mountain peaks. 

You always loved the way that the streaks of the sun’s rays would descend upon this little oasis. They illuminated the whole area with a gentle, golden glow, making the whole space look ethereal. You liked to think that the sun god Helios paid extra attention to illuminating this field because it was so secluded, so untouched from civilisation. 

You especially adored the way that the sun’s rays were reflected on the creek. This was certainly the clearest, bluest waters you had ever seen. Where others saw water, you saw alluring pale blue crystals that sparkled and twinkled underneath the sun’s rays which danced gracefully across the surface of the water. Even when the light breeze brushed against the water, the ripples simply created another bewitching performance for you. You could spend hours watching the water, entranced by the beauty of it all. 

However, you had to admit that you loved the scent that blanketed this area more than anything. You would inhale deeply, savouring the fresh air. The air was such a stark contrast to the stuffy air you were usually surrounded by in the Athenian capital. While you could detect the crisp, fresh odor of pine from the forest, it was faint compared to the scent being emitted from the open field of grass next to the creek that lay before you. The scent was distinct. It was sweet, pleasant, and had an element of earthiness to it. If you could liken the scent to anything, it would be the scent that lingered in the air right after there was a bout of rain, or the scent of the morning dew that always lingered on the grass and flowers. Petrichor. Yes, that was the word used to describe this scent. 

As your eyes drifted over the landscape, and you inhaled the scent of petrichor that wafted through the air, a wave of peace, contentment, and emotional reprieve washed over you. Beyond that, you were overcome with a feeling of gratitude and nostalgia. Gratitude towards your friend, Minghao, for pushing you to find this place, gratitude for being able to actually see this ethereal sight in your lifetime, and nostalgia for all the times you had spent your weekends here. You smiled softly, allowing yourself to embrace all these emotions all at once. There was no need to repress any emotions here. You could just let go. Here, you were alone. Alone but free and happy. 

Yes, you thought to yourself, this field was a sacred space for you. A sanctuary, an escape where you could rest, heal, and seek refuge from the chaos of daily life. 

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Once you made yourself comfortable on your picnic mat, you gazed fondly at the well-thumbed leather bound book that lay on your lap. Out of all the Greek tragedies and epics you read, you had to say that this compilation of popular Greek quotations was your favourite. Sure, you read this book multiple times over, to the point that you could recite most of the quotes by heart. But you loved the feeling of physically flipping through the pages and letting your eyes drift over the words on the paper. Running your fingers over the leather, you carefully opened the book and let yourself be immersed in the beautifully crafted words. 

You quickly lost track of how much time passed. Only when your stomach called out for food did you notice that it was already midday. Placing your book down, you turned to rummage through your woven basket for the lunch you packed. As you did so, you accidentally nicked the palm of your hand on one of the unfinished crafts inside. You hissed at the stinging sensation, quickly pulling your hand out to inspect the damage. You sighed when you saw a tiny cut across your palm. It wasn’t deep, but it started to draw a bit of blood. 

Unbeknownst to you, someone had been watching you all morning. It was Joshua. He was silently observing you from his usual spot behind the foliage. Currently, he was lost in his thoughts wondering why you were reading the same book again. Today was probably the fifth time that he’s seen you bring the book to the creek. When you placed your book down and turned towards your basket, Joshua stood on his tip toes while craning his neck to see the title of the book engraved on the leather cover. 

However, your hiss of pain broke Joshua’s concentration. Out of shock, he yelped and stumbled forward, fortunately regaining his balance before he fell through the foliage. Joshua’s eyes widened and he instinctively slammed his hands over his mouth to try and muffle the yelp that had already escaped him. 

You were making your way to the creek to clean your wound, but the sudden rustling of the foliage behind you caught your attention. Also, was that a yelp? Was someone else here? Turning, you stalked cautiously towards the foliage. 

Joshua did not dare to move a muscle as he heard your footsteps approach. He thought the best thing was to just stand still and pray to the deities that you would walk away. Well, today certainly was not his lucky day. In his attempt to stabilise himself, he had forgotten that he was in fact taller than the bushes that he was hiding behind. 

You eyed the black tuft of hair sticking out from between the bushes. So your suspicions proved to be correct. There was someone else here. 

“Hello? Is everything okay?” You called out. 

Joshua scrunched his face, internally cursing to the deities that they had once again let him down. He began to shuffle around trying to figure out what he should do. His brain told him that he should turn and flee, but his heart said otherwise. It was the first time Joshua had heard your voice, and his heart fluttered in response when you called out to him. This was okay, right? Meeting you would be okay. Maybe he would be able to figure out why he was so drawn to you better this way. Relenting to his heart’s desires, he steeled his nerves and tried to push his way through the foliage to meet you, which proved to be more difficult than he expected. 

Your caution turned into amusement and curiosity as a figure emerged from the bushes. Or at least was trying desperately to. It was apparent that he was struggling to disentangle himself from the bushes. He was cursing under his breath, muttering how he was not going to help the Goddess Gaia water her plants anymore. He stomped around, shoving the plants aside before finally stumbling out of the bushes.

Huffing, he pulled the twigs out of his hair, brushed the leaves off his chiton, and made sure that the gown rested comfortably on his shoulders. He readjusted the belt around his waist as well. You watched as he proceeded to angrily twirl his gold jewelry back in place, his necklace, his ring on his pinky finger, and the arm bands around his biceps. You swallowed thickly at the sight. With that build, the divine aura around him, his gold jewelry, there was no way that he was an ordinary man. His aura reminded you of Minghao’s. Perhaps he was a spirit as well? 

You were unable to keep yourself from snickering. He might be a spirit but just now, he seemed like a clumsy, stumbling fawn trying to walk.

Hearing your snickers, it finally clicked in Joshua’s mind that he was being watched. And by the entrancing human that captured his attention. He suddenly ceased his frantic readjustments and looked up at you like a deer caught in headlights. 

His wide eyes made you burst out laughing. 

Joshua’s expression softened. You were even more mesmerising up close. Your laughter was like music to his ears. Taking in your presence, Joshua’s eyes landed on the injured palm you were clutching close to your body. 

Joshua cleared his throat awkwardly, “Uhm, you should really get that cut healed.”

Sobering up quickly, you nodded, “I’ll just clean it in the creek and bandage it with a cloth that I have on me.”

When you turned towards the creek, Joshua’s hand shot out to grasp your wrist, “No… Don’t clean it in the creek… Wait… I mean… I can heal that for you if you want? Does that sound creepy. I swear I’m a naiad? Yea, you probably have never heard of a male naiad before. That explains why I’m so weak. I can’t heal big wounds or reverse curses or whatever. I’m kind of useless as a naiad. That’s what everyone else says. I can’t do anything the other naiads can… Uh…I apologise, I’m rambling again aren’t I?”

You shook your head, indicating that it was okay. He was a naiad. That explained the divine aura around him. He was definitely a cute naiad, though you felt a pinch of pity for him since that was how lowly he thought of himself. You stood there, patiently waiting for him to gather his thoughts.

Realising what he was doing, Joshua let go of your wrist. He gave you a sheepish look, “I mean… I can still heal small cuts like that… if you don’t mind of course.”

“Sure!” You chirped. 

“Really?” Joshua was dumbfounded. Why would you trust him when you both just met? 

You shrugged your shoulders and extended your injured palm out to him, “I’m y/n by the way. What’s your name? I think I should probably know the name of the handsome naiad who is going out of his way to heal me. Don’t you think so?”

Joshua flushed at your words, even your name was beautiful. Muttering that his name was Joshua, he took your hand in his, treating your hand as he would treat a delicate rose petal. A soft, warm blue light emitted from his hand enveloping yours. Soon, the cut was gone. All that was left was a faint line from where the cut was, and the strong scent of petrichor which calmed you down greatly. 

Inspecting your palm, you beamed at Joshua, “Thank you! Wow, that was amazing! I’ve never actually seen a naiad’s powers in action!” 

Joshua turned his body away from you, refusing to look you in your eyes. He couldn’t believe that you, the human he was completely enamoured with, was treating him with such kindness and gratitude. You thought he was amazing, that his powers were amazing. He had expected you to run or look at him in disgust. He didn’t make a good first impression on you with his stumbling and rambling. Plus, he had basically blurted out all his flaws, his insignificance compared to other naiads. 

Sensing Joshua’s discomfort, you tried to tone down your excitement. Trying to convey as much sincerity as you could in your voice, you said, “really Joshua. Thank you, I really mean it.”

Joshua fiddled with the hems of his chiton. Then, he lifted his head and whispered, “no problem.”

You observed Joshua’s nervous disposition, finding yourself unable to look away. There was something about Joshua, something that made you want to find out more about him, something that made you want to spend time with him. Obviously, there was the physical attraction you felt towards him. Joshua was incredibly attractive. His black undercut made his otherwise gentle eyes look more piercing, as if he was staring right into your soul. But the corners of his lips curled upwards, softening his appearance. His muscles were made more prominent by the golden armbands that rested on his biceps. 

Joshua’s physical appearance screamed strength. Yet, you could discern that within him, there was inner turmoil, deep seeded sadness, hopelessness and self-loathing. You chalked it up to being the accumulation of emotional scars over the years, left by the sharp swords of those who had repeatedly hurled insults at him. The ones who called him a useless naiad. The ones who damaged him, ostracised him, leaving him a vulnerable shell of what he could have been. 

Your heart ached for Joshua. From personal experience, you knew that underneath all the hurt and discrimination he endured, lay a pure, innocent, soul who longed to be healed. You were determined to help him, to save him. You wanted him to find the strength to love himself, and make peace with who he was as a person, who he was as a naiad. You swore to yourself that as long as he would let you, you would stand by Joshua’s side. 

An awkward silence filled the air. Joshua shrank into himself slightly under your tender gaze, snapping you out of your thoughts. Biting your lip to reprimand yourself from staring too long, you hesitated before gesturing towards your basket, “Joshua? It’s midday right now. I was actually just about to have lunch. Please, you’re welcome to join me, I always bring extra food… and I would really love to get to know you better. However, if you’re uncomfortable with my presence, I can go and you can have the creek to yourself.” 

“Me?” Joshua pointed to himself.

“Who else here is named Joshua?” 

“Why?” Joshua breathed incredulously. 

“Why not?” You replied. 

Hearing your response, Joshua recoiled even further. It was beyond his imagination to think that a person as perfect as you would want to get to know someone as damaged as he was. He really longed to get to know you too. It’s just that this was all so embarrassing for him, and he really should not let himself get close to you. This could end badly for the two of you. He should have run earlier, he actually should run and hide right now. He was grateful that you would give him the option to choose whether he wanted you to stay or not, though you shouldn’t have to go because he was being a blushing idiot. He looked at you patiently waiting for him to give you a response while he grappled with all his emotions. 

Just as Joshua opened his mouth to excuse himself politely, his heart once again betrayed his brain. To your delight, and his horror, he blurted, “No, please don’t go. Stay. I… I would love to get to know you better too.” 𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

Wheezing, you grabbed onto Joshua’s forearm, “So the rumours were true? Narcissus is only Narcissus because that stupid cupid Jeonghan shot a love arrow into the pond where he was trying to check his reflection?”

Despite Joshua flushing at the close contact between the two of you, Joshua nodded enthusiastically, “Yes, it’s true. Stupid cupid. That’s a new name for Jeonghan. I’ll have to call him that next time.”

In the short span of three hours that you spent talking to Joshua over lunch, you had gotten more comfortable with each other. Once Joshua warmed up to you, seeing that you were really sincere in wanting to get to know you, he opened up a little. He still wasn’t quite comfortable talking about himself, but he was happy to talk about the adventures of his acquaintances. 

By now, you could safely say that you were completely enamoured with Joshua. He was so gorgeous. You loved the spark of life that lit up in his eyes when he talked about something stupid his acquaintances did (and especially when you said something funny). His laugh was melodic. You adored his little quirk of raising his clenched fist in front of his face while leaning backwards when he laughed. It was so endearing to see how the reserved chuckles turned into full blown belly laughs now that he was enjoying himself. You were definitely successful at breaking down some of his walls today. You also came to know that Joshua was hilarious, witty, and best of all, he was unpredictable in the best way possible. You thought you were about to cry laughing when Joshua placed a piece of lettuce on his head, insisting that he needed some shade from the afternoon sun. 

Squeezing Joshua’s arm one last time before letting go, you heaved a deep sigh to compose yourself. Your eyes landed on your tiny sundial. It was almost 4 in the afternoon. You pouted slightly, realising that you would soon have to part ways with Joshua. 

Noticing the change in your mood, Joshua asked, “Do you need to go soon?” 

You shook your head, “I can stay for another half an hour.” You would really be pushing it as the forest would get dark very quickly. However, anytime spent with Joshua was worth possibly getting lost in the forest.

Shaking those thoughts out of your head, you took another deep breath, relishing in the scent of petrichor that lingered in the air. Was it just you or was the scent stronger now that Joshua was right next to you? Shrugging, you let a comfortable silence envelop the two of you. 

“Y/n? Can I ask you a question before you go?” 

You let out a hum in response to Joshua. 

“How did you find this creek? It’s kind of far from the rest of Athenian civilisation.”

Musing over his question, you explained cryptically, “I guess it all started with one word, kairos.”

Joshua raised his eyebrow at that. You shifted so you were facing him, “You see, my friend, Minghao, he’s a spirit of opportunity. You’ve probably never heard of him. Long story short, I was going through some stuff, and was in desperate need of a break. When Minghao found out, all he said was that word, kairos. He explained that kairos meant the right time. He said that despite all that I was going through, it showed that it was the right time for me to get out of my comfort zone. The right time to venture out of the capital which I lived in all my life to try and find something, perhaps a place, that would help to heal me.”

You paused to gesture to the scenery around you before continuing, “As you can tell, I found this place. You can bet I really hated him at the time. Like you said, it is far from the rest of Athenian civilisation. Honestly I almost gave up when he told me I had to walk through the dense forest. But it was worth it. I don’t know how to explain it. When I was walking through the forest, it was as if there was a little voice in my head telling me to walk this way. It felt like there was a magnet drawing me to this place. Then I came across this little oasis. Minghao was right, it was the right time for me to venture out. I guess… you could say that this creek, this whole area, I didn’t find it. It found me. It healed me when I needed it the most.”

You could still remember the day Minghao told you to walk through the forest. 

“Y/n. You will find what you need when you take the opportunity to venture out of your comfort zone. Given you’re feeling this way, it’s the right time.” Minghao said exasperatedly. 

You rolled your eyes at him, “of course you would say that, you’re a spirit of opportunity.”

Finally sick of your protests, Minghao pushed you out of your house towards the path he had asked you to take, “Don’t come back until you actually try to find what you need.” Then, he added more quietly, “Y/n, please. I promise you won’t regret it.”

Seeing Minghao’s pleading eyes, you relented. If Minghao was this convinced that this walk would do you some good, you should at least try. Minghao’s advice had never steered you in the wrong direction before. Still, you grumbled as you stormed through the dense forest, pushing away the twigs and foliage out of your way. You didn’t know how long you were stalking through the forest. Letting out a frustrated growl, you were about to give up. Your feet hurt, you were tired, and all you wanted to do was go home to sleep. Just then, you saw some light streaming through the thick shade of the forest. 

It was as if the light was a rope, wrapping itself around you and pulling you in that direction. Something inside you told you that you should venture forward, just a little more. So that’s just what you did. And you’ve been coming back to this oasis ever since.

You smiled at the fond memory. You should thank Minghao once again for leading you to find this place. You did meet Joshua because of it. He’s one more attractive reason as to why you will be returning again next week, if he is agreeable to it that is. 

Joshua nodded in understanding. Since there was a naiad presiding over this creek, ie, him, it was normal that mortals would find the creek more alluring. 

You let out a regretful sigh, “I’m sorry Joshua, I really have to go now before it gets dark… I really had a good time today. With you. Would you be okay meeting again next week? You see, I return here every weekend. Only if you’re okay with it.”

You looked at Joshua hopefully. You really wanted to see him again. 

Joshua’s heart fluttered at the prospect of spending another weekend with you. While his conscience began acting up, telling him that this was a really bad idea to make it a recurring thing as you both might end up hurt or worse should she find out, against his better judgment, he elected to ignore his conscience. 

Joshua stood up, smoothened out his chiton, and held his palm out to you shyly, “Sure. I’ll be happy to. Same time and place next week?”

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Before you knew it, a month and a half had already passed since that fateful day that Joshua stumbled (literally) into your life. “Same time and place next week?” became a routine question that you would ask each other at the end of your weekly meetings. 

During that time, you made some progress with Joshua. You were beginning to break down the walls he built to protect himself. You were happy and touched that he was now comfortable enough with you to open up a little bit more. You could tease each other, and share little stories about your daily lives. Joshua no longer lowered his head or turned away when talking to you. He would look you in the eyes and listen to your stories intently with his face scrunched in concentration (and with a light blush dusted across his cheeks). More often than not, you would both talk about your shared interests and hobbies. In one of your earlier conversations, you were overjoyed when Joshua expressed his interest in the crafts that you frequently made by the creek. As it turns out, Joshua loved to make little crafts as well, and your meetings soon turned into crafting slash gossip sessions. 

Originally, you were prepared to do most of the talking. However, as Joshua got more comfortable with you, you were pleasantly surprised that he was more willing to tell you stories as well. Sure, he was still rather reluctant to delve into his personal life or history too much, but he was more than happy to tell you about all the little flowers he was able to water, or all the little animals he came across in the forest. Of course, you respected his boundaries. Afterall, there were things about your own life that you hadn’t shared with him. You understood that he needed time to overcome his insecurities and issues regarding his own identity. 

And in the times that Joshua slipped into his self-deprecating ways when talking about himself, you would just gently remind him that he was doing well before tactfully steering the conversation in a different direction. Spending time with you hearing all those little words from you that reaffirmed his importance and successes slowly mended the wounds and scars that were left on his soul.  

Although he was a naiad, Joshua began to think that you were the one who had mystical abilities. It was as if you were a god of love. You embodied love, care, and beauty. You treated him so gently, with so much care that Joshua began to feel normal again. You indulged his silly little antics, his quirks, his flaws. You made him feel loved. For once, he felt like he mattered.

Joshua was convinced he did want to be near you. He wanted to be with you. In fact, instead of having his initial curiosity satiated, his desire to learn more about you had only magnified in the last few weeks. You exuded an air of self-confidence, and your unconditional acceptance of him, flaws and all, were qualities that Joshua was completely baffled by. How could you be so lovely, humble, and kind? Yea, he had really started to fall completely, and hopelessly in love with you. Luckily for him, you felt the same way towards him.  

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Humming to yourself, you checked your basket one last time to make sure that you had all the materials needed for the day’s crafting session. The crafts Joshua made usually consisted of beaded jewelry. He was fascinated by your ability to weave baskets in a variety of styles and had asked if you could teach him today. 

With one last huff, you pushed past the last of the foliage from the dense forest, brightening up immediately at the sight of Joshua. Or more specifically, Joshua’s broad back. He was crouched over the creek with his back turned to you. For someone that tall, he looked so small and cute. That was when the most amazing idea came to your mind. 

You placed your basket down as quietly as you could. Snickering, you launched yourself at Joshua’s back, hoping to give him a surprise back hug. Sadly, today was not your lucky day. Just as you were about to wrap your arms around Joshua’s shoulders, he shuffled to the right and stood up. You let out a loud squeal, your arms flailing around wildly in the air. You thought you heard Joshua’s distant, worried scream of your name when your body came into contact with the cold creek water. 

Almost instantly, you felt Joshua’s hands grab onto you, heaving you out of the water. 

You shot him a glare, squirming in his arms, “you weren’t supposed to move.”

Joshua scoffed, “that’s the first thing you say to me? Maybe I should have left you in the water. How was I supposed to know my gorgeous Y/n decided to be an idiot and launch themself at my back?”

At Joshua’s words, you stilled. You felt the heat rising to your cheeks. Joshua thought you were gorgeous? He called you his? This might be a good time for you to combust on the spot. Coughing to cover up your embarrassment, you let a cheeky grin spread across your face, “You think I’m gorgeous? And I’m yours? Since when? I don’t remember agreeing…”

Joshua flushed, sputtering, “No… I… I didn’t say any of that… I said sly… yea… sly ridiculous Y/n. Yea… that’s it…”

You brought your face dangerously close to his, enjoying the view of his eyes darting around from beneath his long lashes, looking anywhere but your eyes. You teased, “Reaaalllllyyyy? Because I could have sworn that you said my gorgeous Y/n….” 

Joshua sulked, whining that he didn’t under his breath. You chuckled at his adorable expression. 

Sneezing lightly as a gust of wind passed by, you shivered. Noticing this, Joshua sighed, “What am I going to do with you? Come here. I can only dry you off slightly, but it will be enough to prevent you from catching a cold.”

You scooted closer to Joshua. He raised his palms, letting them glow the soft, warm blue light that was always emitted when he used his naiad abilities. As he started to pull some of the water out of your soaked clothing, the strong scent of petrichor invaded your nose, causing you to sigh in contentment. 

“Why are you always doing that?” Joshua asked.

“What do you mean?”

“You always sigh when I use my powers. I’m sorry, is it uncomfortable for you?”

Whipping your head around, you raised your hand to squish Joshua’s cheeks together, “NO! It’s nothing like that. Don’t ever think that. Your powers are amazing. It’s just that when you use your powers, there’s a really sweet, pleasant smell that I really like.”

“Imndnmmdonenee.”

“What?” You tilted your head, wondering what Joshua was saying. 

Annoyed, he pointed to his squished cheeks. 

“Oh, sorry.” You said, letting go of his face.

Joshua repeated himself, “I said, I’m done. Drying you off I mean. Here, you can have my coat first. Shall we begin basket weaving then? We really don’t have all day.” Joshua feigned an indifferent look, but you could tell he was secretly happy that you actually liked it when he used his abilities. 

You wrapped Joshua’s coat around your shoulders. Wow, you thought to yourself, he really did smell like petrichor. Plopping yourself down on your picnic mat, you snuggled into his coat further, inhaling his comforting scent. 

For a while, you both just sat there, with you teaching Joshua how to weave the different basket styles. You watched, amused by Joshua’s concentration. It was endearing to see how much he loved crafts. It wasn’t exactly an easy task, but it was nice to see that Joshua was able to find joy in engaging in his favourite hobbies.

When he finished weaving a small basket, you cheered loudly, praising his amazing handiwork, “Wow!! It was your first attempt but you did so well? I think I’m going to need you to do all my basket weaving from now on.”

Joshua smiled shyly, still unsure how to feel about being praised, “That’s because I had a good teacher.”

You clicked your tongue, “Flattery will not get you out of helping me. Now, let’s eat!! It’s already two in the afternoon.”

You both cleared the picnic mat, laying out the bread, butter, and fruits that you packed for your lunch. You eagerly dug into your food, savouring the taste of a nice meal after working hard all morning. 

Oh how Joshua adored you. You looked like a little bunny shoving the food in your mouth. You really knew how to enjoy all these simple pleasures in life. He really should watch his mouth better. He already slipped up earlier, calling you his gorgeous y/n. Now that you were both closer to each other, he didn’t want to do anything that might push you away. 

Swallowing another mouthful of food, you could feel Joshua’s eyes on you. Teasing him, you said, “Aren’t you going to eat? Or are you just going to stare at me, your gorgeous Y/n?”

Joshua scratched his cheek sheepishly, trying to cover up the fact that he was staring at you, “I wasn’t staring. I was… thinking. Yea, thinking. Actually, I was thinking, why do you always make so many crafts anyway?”

You looked at him, questioning his weird behaviour. Shrugging it off as another one of Joshua’s awkward episodes, you replied, “On the weekdays, I work at the Athenian agora. You know, the central market? I thought I mentioned this before at some point. Anyway, I sell these baskets and crafts to make a living.”

Your words floated through the wind, along with Joshua’s hum of understanding. You both fell back into a comfortable silence as you finished the remains of your meal. Shortly after, you saw that it was already time to go. You reluctantly pulled Joshua’s coat off your shoulders, though not before you took one last whiff of his comforting scent. Passing Joshua his coat, you began to repack your basket, “Same time and place next week?”

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

The following week, you were sitting on your picnic mat working on a beaded bracelet waiting for Joshua to show up. He was late today, but you weren’t worried. Joshua did tell you that sometimes his daily naiad duties took longer than expected. 

Hearing a twig snap in the distance, you lifted your head from your basket, frowning slightly out of concern as Joshua approached you. You took in his disheveled appearance. He usually swept his bangs to the side, but today, he let his bangs cascade down his face, covering his eyes. Speaking of which, his eyes were downcast. Instead of the brightness that you saw in his eyes during your weekly meetings, he eyes just looked empty. 

“Shua?” You asked tentatively, unconsciously using a more affectionate nickname. 

Joshua let out a frustrated growl, ruffling his hair further. Beaded bracelet long forgotten, you shot up, rushing to grab Joshua’s hands, yelling, “Shua!! Shua! Stop it! You’ll hurt yourself!”

When he didn’t respond, with your hands still on his, you wordlessly guided him to sit down onto the picnic mat. Joshua was normally really good at controlling himself around you, but his emotions were heightened and all he wanted right now was to be wrapped in your embrace. He wriggled his hands free from your grip, diving towards you. You both landed on the picnic mat with a thud. 

As your brain rushed to process what just happened, you felt Joshua turn to bury his head against your stomach, and wrap his arm around your waist. You were taken aback by his actions. Sure, you both had gotten close enough that physical contact wasn’t uncommon. However, besides the occasional heat pat (or the few times Joshua would have to grab your hands/ arms to save you from injuring yourself), Joshua never initiated the physical contact. He must really be feeling bad today if he was initiating physical contact this intimate.  

Sighing, you twisted your body, shifting yourself slightly. Joshua let out a whine at your movement. You hushed him, “I’m moving to make us more comfortable.” 

Finally, when you both were in a more comfortable position, you began to run your fingers through his hair, untangling all the knots that formed during his little tantrum. 

“Bad day?” You probed lightly. 

“Yes.” Joshua replied, his voice muffled by the fabric of your chiton. 

“Do you want to talk about it?” 

“Not really. Let’s just say… I saw some old acquaintances… they… weren’t very nice to me in the past. They didn’t see me though.” Joshua mumbled. 

You felt your heart break at the hurt that laced his voice. Seeing them must have brought up bad memories for him. You couldn’t understand how anyone could be mean to Joshua. He didn’t deserve any of that. Respecting that he didn’t want to talk anymore, you simply hummed in response. 

You continued running your fingers through his hair. Joshua tightened his grip on your waist, “Y/n? Do you think we could just stay like this for a while?”

“Of course, we’ll stay like this as long as you need,” you cooed. 

At some point, Joshua’s grip had slackened, and his breathing became more rhythmic. You stared at his figure adoringly. He fell asleep. You weren’t pleased that Joshua had to relive his painful memories, but your heart fluttered with the knowledge that Joshua felt safe enough to be vulnerable with you. He didn’t have to be afraid to let his guard down when he felt himself breaking, because he knew that you were there to pick up all the broken pieces and hold him until he felt whole again. 

You soon lost track of how much time had passed. You were sure you both missed lunch, though you didn’t care. Joshua was resting so comfortably. His figure looked so peaceful that you didn’t want to wake him. Fortunately, you both landed pretty near your basket. With as little movement as possible, you grabbed your leather bound book and began to read. 

A long, long while later, Joshua’s eyes fluttered open. Where was he? Why did he feel so protected, like he was being shielded from the world? Why did this pillow he was hugging smell so nice? Content, he buried his head further into the pillow. As the fog in his brain began to clear, one thought came to his mind. Since when did he cuddle a pillow to sleep? His eyes shot open, pulling away from the pillow only to see that his ‘pillow’ was you. 

He blushed furiously, hiding his head in his hands. You giggled at his reaction, “good morning sleeping beauty. Or, well, good evening? You slept for quite a long time. It’s already four in the afternoon.”

Joshua groaned. It warmed his heart to know that you had stayed by his side for so long. Still, he was so embarrassed. Silently berating his heart that was still pounding, Joshua looked up at you. You were now sitting up cross legged, gazing at him fondly while holding your book in your hands. 

It was that book again. The one he always saw you reading. Joshua craned his neck trying to read the title of the book, bending in such an awkward position he almost tipped over. You let out a haughty laugh. Joshua pouted, sulking that he had once again embarrassed himself in front of you.

Regaining your composure, you extended the book towards Joshua, “Shua? You wanted to see this?”

Joshua gingerly took the book from you, “A compilation of popular quotes. Compiled by Y/n? You wrote this?”

You shook your head, “No, I just copied out some of my favourite quotes from all the books I read.”

Joshua flipped through the pages in awe, your elegant handwriting making the quotes stand out to him even more. You really had taken the effort to copy all your favourite quotes, many of which he had never seen before. 

“You can borrow the book if you want. I don’t exactly need it.” You offered.

“Really? But this is a one of a kind copy. It’s your prized possession. I couldn’t. What if something happened to it?” 

“I’m sure you’ll take good care of it. Besides, I always see you staring at this book. Since you’re so interested in it, I might as well lend it to you.”

“Are you sure?” Joshua hesitated. 

You shrugged your shoulders, “Sure. I trust you, just like you’ve shown you trust me.”

And just like that, when Joshua thought he could not fall for you any harder, those three words, “I trust you” proved him wrong. 

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

“Y/N! I’m just saying. This quote doesn’t make sense to me. What you leave behind is not what is engraved in stone monuments, but what is woven into the lives of others? You can’t weave anything into the lives of others. That’s the Moirai’s job? They literally weave the fate of humans? Clotho will not be happy to know that her spinning job has been overtaken by this Pericles guy.”

“Shua. Seriously. It’s just a quotation, you don’t need to take it seriously.”

“But it doesn’t make sense.”

“Shua. Again. Don’t worry about it.”

Today, the peace of your little oasis was broken by the banter between you and Joshua. Ever since you lent him your book a few weeks ago, Joshua has been pestering you about how some of the quotations don’t make any sense to him. You were both amused and exasperated at how smart and just how dumb Joshua could be. Sometimes, you were able to carry out intelligent conversations about some of the quotes. Other times… they looked more like this. 

Joshua grumbled, “It makes no sense. You know what else makes no sense? This one.”

You looked at the quote which Joshua was pointing at written by Heraclitus - No man ever steps in the same river twice, for it’s not the same river and he’s not the same man. 

“What is it about this one then?” You ask.

“One, it's going to be the same idiot who decided that it would be a good idea to get into the river. Two, the river doesn’t change. It’s the same damn river.”

“Okay, so maybe it’s the same guy. But you of all people should know that the river is not the same. The water passes through it, just like what happens at this creek.” You retort. 

“No, it’s the water that is not the same. The river is the same. The name of the river is not going to change, and it’s the same river bank. Like this creek. The creek is always going to be called the Iremia creek. Only the water is different. Your human philosophers are trying too hard to write something profound in the simplest of things,” Joshua remarked rather smugly, seeing that he was able to poke holes at one of the quotations in your book. 

You rolled your eyes and stuck out your tongue playfully at him, “Fine, fine. You win this time.  Some friend you are though. We’ve been meeting here for what? Three months now? You never told me that this creek was named Iremia. Next thing I know, you’re going to tell me this is the creek you preside over and that as a human, I should be giving you offerings or worshiping you.”

Joshua raised his eyebrows at your playful remark, “actually, this is my domain… Just because those other narcissistic deities like their domains to be named after them doesn’t mean I do. I’m not naming my creek Joshua’s creek…”

“WHAT? SERIOUSLY? WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME?” you shrieked, cutting him off abruptly. 

“I mean, it’s not like I go around advertising it. And no, I don’t expect humans to bow down to worship me. Honestly, it’s a stupid practice. Others engage in it just so they can dangle their power over you humans. Although… if you wanted to, I’m not opposed to it,” Joshua smirked. 

You lightly punched Joshua’s arm, “Hell no. Not even if Hades dragged me into hell.”

You began tapping your index finger against your cheek, another quirk of yours that Joshua noticed, one that you did when you were lost in thought. 

You mused, “I think Joshua’s creek or Shua’s creek would be pretty names. Your name means to save or to deliver. It makes sense because of your job directing fresh water to nearby towns. But I agree with your choice of name for this creek. Iremia is the perfect name. For such a breathtaking place, it lives up to what its name means. Serenity.”

Then, you suddenly turned to jab your finger accusingly at Joshua’s chest. You whined, “Still. I can’t believe you didn’t tell me!”

“To be fair, you never asked.”

“Shua. I hate you.”

“No you don’t. You adore me.”

As soon as those words escaped his lips, you stared at Joshua, wide-eyed. You felt the heat rising to your head, you were sure your jaw dropped, and your heart began to beat wildly in your chest. 

With your head spinning, you sputtered indignantly, “So… so… so what if I do? Adore you… I mean.”

Now, it was Joshua’s turn to become a blushing, sputtering mess. His hands flew to cover his reddening face. He had mindlessly uttered those words in response to your remark, not expecting you to actually respond to it.

Joshua bashfully averted his eyes from yours, murmuring, “Do you really mean that?”

Your heart melted at his tentativeness. Slowly, you brought your index finger under his chin, lifting his head so you could look him in the eyes. When your eyes finally met his, you affirmed seriously, “I do. I adore you. So so so much.”

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

Squealing, you slid down against your front door, curling up into a ball on the floor. You rubbed your palms against your cheeks, hoping that the coldness from your palms would calm the hot flush that hadn’t disappeared. Your mind was racing. Your heart was pounding. Adrenaline pumped through your veins. Did you really say that to Joshua? No, actually more specifically did you really say “I adore you” to Joshua while tilting his chin towards you just now? 

You let out a giddy shriek. YOU DID! That was practically your indirect, direct confession to Joshua. Gods, you liked Joshua. He was just so handsome, so sweet, so quirky, so unpredictable, so delicate, so gentle, so shy, so bold, so reserved, so mysterious. You liked all of his qualities, as contradictory as they might seem. 

You swooned thinking about the changes in his personality between the time when you first met and your meeting this afternoon. He opened up to you, he joked around with you, he was comfortable enough to initiate physical contact (or affection?) with you. Best of all, he was growing to become more and more confident in himself. Those walls that he built, the same ones you had been chipping at slowly? They crumbled enough for you to squeeze your way in. And those scars and wounds that Joshua bore? You patched them up with as much love and care as you could. Perhaps you were giving yourself too much credit, but you couldn’t help it. At the end of the day, you were the reason why Joshua looked happier, why there was more life in his eyes than ever before, why he walked with a spring in his step, why he no longer averted his eyes when talking about himself (most of the time anyway). Joshua was breaking out of his shell, and you couldn’t be more proud of him. 

Honestly? Romance had been the last thing on your mind. Since you were in your teens, your primary goal was to earn a living. Sure, your parents left you with enough for you to live comfortably, but you didn’t want to rely on their money. Between work and educating yourself, socialising and by extension being in a romantic relationship was not what you prioritised. Then you met Joshua. Initially, you thought that you simply wanted to help his injured soul heal. You were wrong. As you grew closer, Joshua intrigued you, he captivated you. You liked him in his entirety, he had pulled you in until he was all you could think about. 

Joshua believed Pericles’ quote made no sense, though you had a different perspective. Like it or not, people were able to weave themselves into the lives of others. Joshua is a great example of that. Your lives were now intertwined, tightly you might add. Everywhere you looked, in unexpected actions, you saw traces of Joshua, and the times you spent together. The baskets and jewelry you sold, the freshly baked bread from the market, quotes that you came across. Crystals. The vastness of the sky. Gold arm bands. Bunnies. The colour blue. Feathery blades of grass. Black hair. The stars littered across the sky. Water. Puddles. Morning dew. Rain. The scent of petrichor that wafted through your nose after heavy rainfall. Everything reminded you of Joshua. 

Ah. Maybe the word like was putting it lightly. You loved Joshua. 

When that realisation set in, you screeched, loudly pounding your fists against your floor boards. 

“Y/N?? ARE YOU OKAY? I HEARD THE SCREAMS OF A DYING ANIMAL!!” Minghao burst into your house, literally taking your front door off its hinges. He flung the door away, which meant that since you were crouched in front of the door, you were flung along with your poor door to the side. 

You yelped at the force of being thrown. Regaining your bearings, you scowled at Minghao, who at least had the decency to pretend to cower under the intensity of your gaze, “There was no animal you moron. It’s just me. This is the fourth time this month that you’ve come running in here, taking my door out in the process. Gods, and do I have to remind you to be gentle? I get you’re a super powered spirit but I’m only a human! I’m too cute and delicate to be thrown around like that.”

Minghao snorted, “Cute and delicate are not words I would use to describe you. Not after those animalistic screeches you let out. Please, if you are cute and delicate, then I am beauty personified, Aphrodite herself.”

You huffed, rubbing your butt to soothe the ache of landing on it. 

“You’re late by the way. You’ve been arriving home later and later on the weekends. I’m not going to lie, it’s worrying. Don’t forget that there are wild animals in those forests you have to trek through,” Minghao notes, his tone much softer this time. 

You chuckled sheepishly, “Uh, right. Sorry about that. I’ve been… distracted? Yea, that’s the word, I lose track of time when I’m by the Iremia creek.”

Minghao gawks at you.

“What? Oh yea, I just learned the name of the creek today! Iremia. Pretty right?” You chirped, unaware of the feeling of terror that rushes over Minghao.

Minghao lunges forward, grasping your arms a little too tightly, horror and worry etched on his face, “Why would you go there? Are you okay? You’re okay? Please please please tell me you’re okay.”

Stunned by Minghao’s outburst, all you could manage was a small squeak and a nod of your head. 

Although relieved, Minghao’s grip only tightens, “Out of all the creeks in Athens, why would you choose to go to that one? I can’t believe it. What am I going to do with you?”

“Is something wrong with it? It’s been nice…” you stammer, your voice trailing off. In all the years you’ve known Minghao, he has never reacted like this before. 

Minghao sighs, finally letting go of your arms, “For one. You have to push through the dense forest just to get there. Which again, has dangerous wild animals.”

“Pshh that’s nothing,” you boast, cutting Minghao off. 

Minghao glares at you, irritated that he was being interrupted, “Fine. But how about the fact that it backs up onto the Nomia mountains.”

“What is a Nomia?” you ask. 

“Shhhhhh. I’m getting to that. You are an impatient, ditzy human.”

You make a face at him, but Minghao ignores you, continuing his story, “I actually can’t believe you don’t know who she is. Nomia is the most infamous, wretched, selfish, downright wicked nymph there is. She’s an extremely powerful Oread, a mountain nymph. You’ve seen how expansive the mountains are. It’s a reflection of her power. She likes to toy with humans who don’t worship her. If you aren’t licking her feet, she will put a curse on you. I heard a story where she turned a man into stone because he refused to be her lover. She’s dangerous y/n. Why would you go there? I thought I told you NEVER to walk on the path leading to the left.”

You pouted, apologetically admitting, “Heh? Hao, you always say left and right this, left and right that. Blah blah blah. I’m not the best with instructions or directions if you haven’t noticed. How was I supposed to know. I guess I got confused. That does explain why people always give me weird looks when I venture into that part of the forest. BUT! You can’t blame me for going back. That creek is perfect. A real gem. Besides, I’ve never run into this Nomia. It’s not her creek.”

“Still. She’s dangerous. You shouldn’t go back. It’s not worth the pain that comes should you have to face her fury.”

“You? Minghao, the spirit of opportunity has reservations about me going to this place? You’re telling me I should not grasp the opportunity I have to enjoy that place to the fullest? I can’t believe the day has finally come for you to dissuade me from doing something.”

“Y/n. I want to protect you. Believe me please. It’s not worth it.” Minghao seethes. 

You look down, tracing patterns on the floor boards that seem to be more interesting at this moment. You think back to all the good times you spent near the Iremia creek. You loved it even before you met Joshua. Joshua… he was there. The fact that he was there was enough for you to throw Minghao’s warnings out the window completely. You would go to the ends of the earth to meet Joshua. The risks didn’t matter. You would take the risk. Joshua was worth it.

“But it is,” you whisper dreamily. 

Minghao groans, finding himself unable to scold you further when he sees a contented, dreamy look spread across your face. You looked happy. 

“Fine. At least do me a favour? Promise me you’ll be careful. And whatever you do. Do not. I repeat. Do not talk to any nymphs or naiads in that area. You don’t know if any of them are affiliated to Nomia, or if they are Nomia.” Minghao sighs, accepting that you weren’t going to stop visiting the Iremia creek. 

You gave him a dopey smile and saluted him, agreeing to his terms outwardly. You would heed his advice and not talk to any other nymphs. Joshua on the other hand? You knew him. He was more of a lone wolf amongst the nymphs. He was definitely male which meant he was not Nomia. You were one hundred percent going to continue talking to Joshua. You trusted him. Plus, Joshua never mentioned anything about being affiliated to Nomia. So yes, you were safe with him. Right?

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

At that moment, as you gleefully daydreamed about what your future meetings with Joshua would bring, back near the creek, Joshua was storming into his own house with hot angry tears streaming down his face. 

Joshua had returned home in high spirits, his head in the clouds. The moment you flustered him by saying you did adore him was replaying in his head on a loop. However, when he approached his house, a shrill voice rang out, “Joshua Hong Jisoo? Where have you been? I’ve been waiting for you here.”

Annoyed that his good mood was about to be ruined again, Joshua gritted his teeth, “Nowhere… I’ve been out. Doing chores. Some of us nymphs have to exert extra energy to carry out our tasks.”

The owner of the voice laughed haughtily, emerging from the shadows, “You see. You say that, but I can practically smell the human on you. You reek. So I’ll ask again. Where have you been?”

“Nowhere. I told you. I was doing chores. I have to go into town for that. Obviously I would be surrounded by humans,” Joshua spat.

“Giving me attitude are you? Don’t you dare speak to me this way!”

After the day Joshua had, all he wanted to do was to go home, and dream of you. Obviously, that wasn’t going to happen now. Joshua rolled his eyes, refusing to entertain this nonsense. He brushed past the figure roughly. 

Joshua stormed into his house, the figure’s grating voice still following him. She barked, “YOU BELONG TO ME JOSHUA HONG JISOO. I. OWN. YOU. I swear I will find out why you’re acting this way and who you’re hanging out with. You’ll regret pushing me away. Whoever you were with will pay for getting in my way. They are turning you away from me. No one. And I mean no one. Messes with what belongs to me. Nomia.”

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

“As I was saying, the Panathenaea festival is coming up. It’s going to be so fun! I can’t believe it’s already nearing the end of summer! We spent the whole summer together. Can you believe that Shua? This festival is held once every four years to celebrate Athena and some other Gods. There’s sports and music performances. I don’t really care for all that, but I really want to try all the sweets that are made of honey. It’s a special delicacy…”

You continued to drone on and on, waving your arms about animatedly. You weren’t particularly fond of other festivals. Those were too hedonistic for your liking. The Panathenaea festival was different. It was more of a communal celebration rather than just a ritual for the Gods. It was a time when the Athenian community would gather to partake in the games together. In this festival, humans were supposed to enjoy it as much as the Gods it was held for. 

However, in your excitement, you didn’t notice that Joshua wasn’t listening to you at all. He was still incredibly shaken after encountering Nomia the previous week. While he nodded along to your babbles, the words weren’t registering in his brain. His mind was distant, yet still extremely alert. He wasn’t going to deny that he was extra jumpy today. His senses were in overdrive. The buzzing of the bee, the water rushing down the creek, the water droplets from the morning mist, the distant howl of a wolf in the forest, Joshua heard, and felt it all. He was on edge. He felt like a sitting duck, waiting for something, someone, to interrupt your peaceful time together. 

Truthfully, Joshua was terrified of meeting you today. He was worried that Nomia would follow him, or send someone to follow him. He didn’t want to put you at risk. You were in enough danger as it was if Nomia found out you were the human he was spending his weekends with. The logical plan would have been to avoid you, to break all contact with you. Alas, the heart wants what it wants. You were his escape, the only one he had and could rely on in this cruel world. With that, Joshua found himself unable to stay away from you. 

“Shua? Shua!! Hello? I’ve been calling your name for the past thirty seconds. Are you okay? You’re looking kind of, uhm, how do I put this lightly… Your face is all twisted, like you're disturbed by something. Is it something I said?” 

Your voice startled Joshua, causing him to jump from his sitting position into a defensive position. Instantly, he pushed you behind him, standing in front of you protectively. His eyes darted around frantically. He was looking out for danger. It was strange, he didn’t feel any ominous presence around the two of you. Nevertheless, whisps of pale blue light danced around his finger tips. Regardless of how overpowered the others might be compared to him, Joshua was ready to unleash all his powers to defend you. He would defend you to his dying breath. 

Confused and a little freaked out at Joshua’s actions, you grabbed onto the fabric of Joshua’s chiton, ducking behind him and squeezed your eyes shut. After a couple of seconds, you lifted your head, peaking at your surroundings from behind Joshua. There was nothing wrong? No danger at all? 

Calming yourself down, you rubbed circles around Joshua’s back in an attempt to soothe him, “Shua. Calm down. There’s no danger around us.”

You felt him stiffen at the contact. You continued your actions, reassuring him by repeating the words, “It’s okay. We’re okay. You’re okay. I’m okay.” until his form relaxed a little. 

Hesitantly, you asked, “Shua? Is everything okay?”

Joshua let out a shaky breath, murmuring, “No no, nothing is wrong.”

Liar. You wanted to say. No one has that kind of reaction if nothing is wrong. You looked at him doubtfully. You opened your mouth, wanting to comment about his reaction, but you didn’t have the heart to. Joshua’s appearance was haggard. He was inhaling and exhaling deeply, trying to calm himself down. You could still see a sliver of the pale blue light around his fingers. He was still on edge. He was trying to convince you as much as he was trying to convince himself that you were both okay, that there was no danger around you. 

Deciding to let him go this time so as to not rattle Joshua further, you brushed over his reaction, opting to return to what you had been talking to him about previously, “Uhm. So as I was saying. Are you going to the Panathenaea festival? I don’t know how you naiads celebrate it. Do you gather with the others? Meet distant relatives or something?”

Unfortunately, though you were trying to lighten the mood, your words had the opposite effect on Joshua as he tensed up. His mood souring even further. He scoffed, “No I don’t plan on partaking in that stupid festival. I don’t have anyone to celebrate it with anyway.”

“Oh… uhm… that’s fine. It’s not everyone’s cup of tea I guess. I don’t really have anyone to celebrate it with either. I just go for the vibes you know? It’s the one day of the year people are more accepting of everyone in the community.” You stammer.

An awkward silence fell upon you both. Seeing your dejected expression, Joshua grimaced. You were so excited about the festival and his bad mood only served to make you feel bad as well. Joshua wrecked his brain, trying to think of something, anything to say to make you feel better. But the more he thought about the festival, the more infuriated he became. All his brain seemed to be able to fixate on was the fact that he would be alone. Then he thought back to all the times he saw you alone near the creek, that content look on your face when you were by yourself. He was green with envy. How did you do it? It wasn’t fair. 

The anger and jealousy bubbling in his chest, Joshua spitefully blurts, “I don’t know how you can be so okay with being alone. It never seems to bother you at all. I’m all alone and I hate it. I’m not powerful. All I can do is manipulate water a little, maybe heal small cuts. It’s enough to direct fresh water towards the neighbouring cities. But for me it takes so much effort. I don’t possess any of the other famed healing powers, or prophetic powers naiads are supposed to have. In addition to being a failure of a naiad, I’m a freak of nature. Male naiads are extremely rare, they aren’t supposed to exist. Right now I believe I’m the only one in existence. Everyone either ridicules me or wants to use me for their political gain. No one truly cares for me in that community.”

Clenching his fists, Joshua continues bitterly, “I have no family. I’m all alone.”

After Joshua’s tirade, he looks at you expectantly. Your heart went out to him. Under the anger, jealousy, and bitterness that laced his voice, under his accusatory gaze, you could hear and see his plea for answers. He was exhausted, drained. He wanted to know, no, he needed to know how you coped. 

You contemplated on what to say for a while. Breathing in deeply, you say softly, “I wouldn’t say that being alone doesn’t bother me at all. I do get lonely. It’s not like I don’t talk to people. I try my best to be outgoing when I’m working in the marketplace. But that’s how I make a living. Other than that… Shua, I get it you know. What it’s like being an outsider within the community that you live in. Everyone either shames you or wants to be friends with you. I get it, I understand how you feel. Aside from you and Minghao, I don’t have any friends. I’m not actually an Athenian citizen. I’m a Metic, a foreigner who lives in Athens.”

You pause, looking at Joshua to gauge his reaction. You were slightly afraid that Joshua would see you differently once you revealed your identity to him. Metics weren’t usually treated kindly or seen positively by most Athenians and deities. 

Relieved when the only reaction you received was an emotionless blink, you continued, “My heritage and identity guarantees that regardless of how long I live in Athens, I lie outside of Athenian society. They don’t accept me because of where I come from, who I am. Metics, our wealth is usually passed onto us from our families. For those who know, they don’t see me as a genuine friend. They see me as someone to leech off given the change, someone to try and manipulate. I don’t have any family here so like you, I’m alone. I have to stand up for myself. It’s just, after so much time of being alone, I’ve come to terms with it? I’m at peace with it. I’m different from others, and that’s okay. I am who I am, I can’t control or change that. What I can control is who I surround myself with. I rather be alone than be manipulated or treated like dirt.”

Taking in your words, hearing that in a way, you were an outcast like him, the last of Joshua’s walls crumbled. He knew you were one of the most accepting people he would ever meet. Since the first time he met you, you accepted him for who he was. You never judged him for being different from other naiads. You never judged him for being weaker, for making self-deprecating comments. In fact, you took his words and turned them around, finding beauty in his abilities. You constantly affirmed him, made him feel appreciated, loved. You wanted him to see how beautiful, and perfect he was, flaws and all. You always longed for him not only to see himself how you saw him, but to believe in himself, just as you believe in him. Honestly, Joshua thought that it was weird that you thought so highly of him. He wondered why you were so accepting. Now, he knew. You were different too. 

“Also Shua? We’re not always born into the family we want, nor are we always blessed to live within a community we want. It’s also easier said than done for us to uproot our whole lives to get a fresh start. Sometimes that’s just not possible. But the good thing is, like I said, we can try to control who we want to surround ourselves with. We can make our own family.”

Joshua’s head snaps up, his eyes meeting yours, you flush, shyly offering, “Since we’re two familyless outcasts, if you want, I’ll be your family.”

Joshua stares at you in disbelief, “Really?” 

His question, though seemingly simple, reflected all the emotions that flashed through his eyes. There was the shock that you would even offer. Hesitation, doubt, and caution, which were instinctual given years of alienation and his experiences of being manipulated, perhaps you wanted something more from him. He was also afraid of being let down. But Joshua knew you had no malice in your words, you were sincere. He trusted you as much as you trusted him. So finally, his eyes shone with hope and gratitude. 

You scrunch your nose, stating in a matter of fact tone, “Not to be that annoying person, but I should point out that Euripides once said that love is all we have, the only way we can help the other.”

You nodded your head seriously after, though the seriousness was broken by the upturned corners of your lips, and the crinkles at the corners of your eyes. Since Joshua’s eyes were so bright, you couldn’t stop yourself from smiling, having already (accurately) predicted what Joshua’s answer would be. As sincerely as you could, you said, “I would be honoured to be your family.”

A deep blush spreads across Joshua’s face, and he whispers, content and happy, “Okay. We’ll be our own little family. Just you and me.”

Joshua thought no one would understand him, the loneliness, emptiness, alienation, discrimination that he felt. Then you came along, revealing the most personal aspects of yourself to him. Your words brought him an immense amount of relief. It was as if you extended your hand to him, pulling him up from drowning in his loneliness. For so long, he punished himself, blaming himself for not fitting on, for not having a family, for being an outcast. But the thing is, he didn’t need to. All Joshua needed to do was to find his own family, one that accepted him for who he was, and one that didn’t condemn him for who he wasn’t.  𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

Since that fateful day when you both swore to be each other’s family, you and Joshua became closer than ever. All the walls Joshua built to protect himself now lay in ruins, making way for you to deliver as much love, affirmation, and affection as possible into his heart. As Joshua thought about all this and what you have done for him, his heart fluttered. He felt eternally grateful and indebted to you. 

Before, he was broken. Going through the motions of life was tedious, and regardless of how much effort he put into his duties, it was never enough. But you certainly healed him. You taught him that titles and labels didn’t define who he was and how he should be living his life. Spending time with you, you helped him to learn that life wasn’t so bad. In fact, life was palatable. He learned to find joy in all the little things like taking in the ethereal scenery, listening to the light trickles of the water, sharing a meal with someone you loved, even weaving baskets in comfortable silence. Life was worth living. 

At the same time, you were also relieved and grateful that Joshua didn’t make a fuss about your foreign heritage and identity. It was hard for you to open up about these things. In the past, every time you had, it backfired. However, Joshua was different. He wasn’t a hypocrite, he wouldn’t have cast you aside just for that. You were ashamed of yourself for even thinking that he would. You really should have given Joshua more credit. Afterall, you were both two misfits in the same pod. 

When you were both together, labels were mostly irrelevant. The creek had been a space you carved out for yourself, an escape and a place of refuge from life in the Athenian capital. Now, you saw the creek as a space that you and Joshua carved out for yourselves, a space you both could be yourselves. “Misfits”. “Outcasts”. “Joshua the male naiad”. “Y/n the metic”. Who you were in your respective communities didn’t matter here. When it was just the two of you, within that little oasis next to the Iremia creek, you both were simply Joshua, and Y/n. 

The only time labels were still a tiny bit important for you both, was when you were trying to describe your relationship with each other. You were certainly best friends, and each other’s confidants. And above all else, you could describe your relationship as a found family. 

However, neither of you could deny that you definitely wanted something more to happen between you. The gentle, feathery touches between you that left the butterflies in your stomach fluttering in a frenzy. The tender, fond, love-filled gazes that you exchanged with Joshua. All the playful banter that bordered on flirting, all the times you both actually flirted with each other. These were just some of the pieces of evidence that proved there was a romantic attraction and connection between you and Joshua.

Honestly? It was obvious to the two of you that you loved each other. But neither of you wanted to openly acknowledge those feelings. More than anything, because you were certain that you did love each other, the explicit acknowledgement of those feelings would make things real. It would mean that you would have to discuss it, things might change. Perhaps it would be the more light-hearted, playful dynamics? The way you go about your meetings? The future? (And of course, Joshua was afraid of what Nomia would do if she found out). So, you had an unspoken mutual agreement that you wouldn’t ever venture a step into that direction. 

For the sake of maintaining the status quo, you and Joshua would just continue to feign ignorance, pretending that your budding romance wasn’t anything more than a light drizzle rather than what it really was - a heavy downpour. 

The only thing was, this downpour wasn’t one that would eventually fade away. It was one that would continue to build, roaring and howling away until it was a torrential rainstorm that threatened to wreck havoc at some point in the near future. 

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

Annoyance. That was all you felt. Exhaling sharply, you turned away from Joshua, refusing to look into those adorable, large, doe eyes. If you did, you knew you would crumble straight away. But right now, you wanted to stand your ground firmly. Joshua had crossed a delicate line. He should never have said it. He knew he shouldn’t, and he said it anyway. There was absolutely no way you were going to forgive him for what he said. 

“Y/nnnn,” Joshua whined, poking at your sides. He still didn’t understand the severity of what he said, and you weren’t going to let him go that easily. He needed to learn that his words had consequences.

Casting a quick glare at Joshua, you crossed your arms, harrumphing and looking away. You wouldn’t give in to him today, no matter how hard he pleaded.

“Y/nnn…” Joshua tried again. When he saw that you had no reaction, he moved in front of you. He kneeled down, rubbing his hands together. He pouted, widening his doe eyes wider than normal, knowing that that always wore down your defenses. Alas, his move had no effect on you because you squeezed your eyes shut tightly. 

Pursing his lips together, Joshua decided that he would make one last attempt to get your attention. He was going to bring out the big guns. If this didn’t work, then he would give up, admit defeat, and walk away until you were ready to speak to him again.

Opening his mouth, Joshua cooed tenderly, “Darling…” 

Damn. He was really giving it his all. This was the first time he called you by this affectionate nickname. You felt the heat rising to your cheeks. Your heart fluttered at his voice, begging you to open your eyes so you could look at him. You tried as hard as you could to fight off the smile that was starting to spread across your face, your defenses cracking. 

Seeing your demeanor falter, Joshua tried once again, cooing, “Darling… My darling y/nnnn…”

Cursing your huge soft spot for Joshua and his use of that nickname, your defenses were completely defeated. You cracked your eyes open, seeing Joshua giving you an adorable eye smile. He was beaming at you, happy that he managed to win you over. 

You scrunched your nose, still unwilling to completely give in to him, “I’m still angry with what you said. Don’t think you calling me darling is going to make this go away.”

“Really? Because I think it was really effective,” Joshua teased. 

“Shua! You called that basket I made ridiculous!” You exclaimed, picking up the tiny little basket you weaved, cradling it to your chest. 

“But it is!”

“Is not!”

“Is too!”

“Shua! Is not!”

“Is too! Darling, what can you even put in that? It’s two centimeters in diameter.” Joshua retorted. 

You gave Joshua a deadpan expression, raising your finger to tell him to wait as you fished around your larger basket for something. Once you found it, you looked smugly at Joshua, dropping it into the tiny mini basket.

“Darling. That’s a walnut.” Joshua stated.

“So?”

“It’s one singular walnut.”

“Yea.” You nodded proudly. 

“I stand by my original statement. It’s ridiculous.” 

You clicked your tongue at him, “No, it’s practical and cute. You don’t appreciate art.”

Joshua rolled his eyes at you, but nodded along, half-heartedly agreeing with what you said to get you off his back. 

Needing to get in the last word, you blurted, “It’s cute. That’s final. Unlike someone when he first stumbled out of the bushes over there. You looked like a fawn trying to walk for the first time.”

Joshua reeled back in horror, “You promised never to talk about that! It’s embarrassing.” 

You shrugged, “All’s fair in love and war.”

Puffing his cheeks, Joshua muttered some curses under his breath that even Hades would blush at. You laughed. It was always fun to get Joshua riled up because he would never openly curse at you. He had too much patience and was too much of a gentleman. 

Actually, speaking of your first meeting, there was something you were always curious about but never brought up. 

“Shua? I’ve always wondered, what were you doing behind those bushes anyway?”

Joshua stiffened. After speaking to you and getting closer to you, he forgot that he had spied for weeks. You never brought it up before, and he pushed that memory to the back of his mind. Perhaps it was time to come clean with you. What’s the worst that could happen? Oh right, you might be extremely put off by him. You could potentially call him a creep and storm off…

Joshua gulped, “Honestly? I was watching you. The first time I saw you, you completely captivated me. Then you kept returning, and it made me curious… so you know… I decided just to watch you until I could figure out why I was so attracted to you.”

Putting his hands up in surrender, Joshua was quick to try and explain his actions. “It was Jeonghan! He told me that the only way for me to figure out why you were so alluring was to just watch you! I swear I wasn’t trying to be a creep. Well… I was being a creep… No. What I meant to say was… I didn’t mean any harm… Uh… Nevermind that. I’m sorry???” Joshua squeaked, completely flustered. 

You gawked at Joshua, shocked that one, he had practically been stalking you, and two, he basically just confessed that he was attracted to you. 

Joshua swallowed thickly. You were just gawking at him. And yea, he deserved it, but he felt himself shrinking and shifting uncomfortably. 

Finally, electing to conveniently ignore Joshua’s confession. You fixated on his stalker-esque behaviour, asking, “Uhm.. well, was I at least fun to watch?”

“What…” Joshua was stumped, “Wait… that’s your response? No yelling, no screaming, no shouting pervert! Or creep! What happened to having normal reactions!” 

You looked at Joshua expectantly, replying smoothly, “Who said I was normal? Besides, I think if you meant to harm me, you would have done it a long long time ago. You mentioned once that naiads are naturally curious. I guess I can’t exactly fault you for that. But I would like to know. Was it fun to watch me?”

Joshua nodded, still speechless. 

Satisfied, you snickered at him, “Who knew huh? Mr. Gentleman has a naughty side.”

Joshua laughed, getting up from his sitting position. He inched closer to you, reaching out to wriggle his fingers at you, “Naughty? I’ll show you.”

You screeched, springing up from your seat. You nervously inched away from Joshua before running off in the opposite direction, yelling, “You’ll have to catch me first!”

Immediately, Joshua sprinted after you, laughing maniacally along the way. Every time he neared you, he reached out, trying to grab onto your arm. But you were faster, managing to evade his grip. 

Your laughter floated through the air melodically. You looked so happy, so carefree, just running around across the big open field as the wind brushed past your face. Joshua instinctually slowed down, staring at you in awe. 

Noticing Joshua was some distance away from you, you stuck out your tongue at him, teasing him lightly, “Shua, for a big strong naiad, you’re kind of slow.”

Snapping out of his daze, Joshua lunged forward suddenly. He caught you off guard and was able to wrap his hands around your arms. Bringing you closer to him so your body was flush against his, he breathed in a low voice, “Who’s slow now?”

Your brain stopped working. Joshua was close enough that you could feel his breath against your face. You could feel his firm muscles against your body. You knew he was sculpted like a Greek god, but you didn’t know he was this muscular. And did he always smell this strongly of petrichor? Your senses were buzzing. Blood rushed to your face. You flushed under his half-lidded, alluring gaze, and his teasing. Your heart was running a thousand miles per minute. You felt your lungs constrict. You held your breath, not daring to breathe or move, afraid that if you did, Joshua would realise the hold he had on you. 

That said, you were sure that your proximity meant he could feel the rapid thumping of your heart. And you weren’t sure if your senses were playing tricks on you, because for a moment, you swore you could feel Joshua’s heart doing the exact same thing.

Just as you thought you were going to overheat and combust, your moment with Joshua was interrupted by a sudden flash of lightning followed by the jarring rumbling of thunder in the distance. You felt a few water droplets fall on your head. Looking around, you were a little disoriented that there might be an incoming storm despite the seemingly clear, sunny skies. Looks like Zeus was in one of his moods again. 

Breathing a sigh of relief at the escape the incoming storm provided you from that nerve wracking moment with Joshua, you wriggled around in Joshua’s grip, whining, “Shua, we really should get out of here. There’s going to be rain.”

Your wriggling proved to be futile. Joshua kept a firm grip on you, “there’s no rush darling.”

“Shua! Seriously, we’re going to get wet!”

“Don’t worry your pretty little head darling. We’ll be fine even with the rain coming.”

You scoffed, “easy for you to say. You can’t get sick, but I will. Human. Remember?”

Joshua shook his head at your protests, “In case you hadn’t noticed darling, it’s already pouring.”

Loosening his grip on you slightly, Joshua nodded upwards, gesturing for you to take a closer look at your surroundings. Confused, you let your eyes trail upwards, following Joshua. 

Gasping, you were utterly in awe at the sight you were met with. There was something like a barrier sheltering you from the downpour, something transparent. It was almost like a bubble, but one that only enveloped you and Joshua. Beyond that, the heavy downpour continued.

Upon closer inspection, the rain droplets around you appeared as though they were suspended in the air. It wasn’t that there was a dome around you. Rather, the rain droplets were being directed around you in a dome-like shape. This made the droplets look akin to a gorgeous, extravagant, crystal chandelier. Similar to the sparkles that you loved so much when you observed the water on the creek’s surface, each of the rain droplets sparkled under the light. Together, they emitted a pale blue shimmer. The colour was familiar to you, reminiscent of the colour that you always saw when Joshua used his powers. 

Looking at Joshua’s hands that were still gripping your sides, a similar faint glow could be seen around his fingers. Putting two and two together, you realised that Joshua was using his abilities to keep the two of you dry. That was why the scent of petrichor was so strong. In a way, you were right to note that the scent came from Joshua, though it was due to him using his powers and not the proximity of your bodies. Seems like it had been raining for a while, you were just too preoccupied going crazy over more important things (Joshua’s body against yours) that you were completely unaware of your surroundings. 

Noticing that you understood what was going on, Joshua hushed you, “Hush now darling. Now you see why there’s no rush? We’re perfectly dry here.”

You nodded, still speechless. The little dome you were in with Joshua was beautiful. Enthralled by the sight, you raised a finger out, gingerly trying to touch a suspended water droplet. You giggled when the droplet still splashed against your finger. Out of curiosity, you stuck a hand outwards, wondering what would happen if your hand went out of the little dome Joshua created. You squealed when you felt the cold rain water hit your hand. Obviously, outside the dome, the rain water continued to fall as per normal. 

You snickered when you heard Joshua sigh in loving exasperation. You wiped your wet hand on Joshua’s chiton, ignoring his protests. Then, you continued to observe your surroundings with child-like awe and glee, commenting, “It’s beautiful.”

“You are.” Joshua murmurs mindlessly, his eyes never leaving your form.

As always, Joshua had been watching you from the background as you went about exploring and observing the space around you. This reminded him of the reasons why he was so inexplicably drawn to you in the first place. Your bright eyes. The ones that were so clear, so filled with life, curiosity and wonder. Your eyes sparkled under the glow of the crystal-like water droplets. The corners of your eyes crinkled more and more as you became increasingly captivated by the rain droplets. 

He continued to watch you silently, feeling his heart melt and the butterflies in his stomach stir as you shot him appreciative, joyful glances. He remembered seeing you have that expression when you took in the scenery of the little oasis you were currently in. Now, you had that same expression while enjoying something with him, something that he created. More than that, Joshua recognised that your eyes reflected something more than appreciation and gratitude. Love. That was it. 

You looked at him like he created the whole world. That look, it was so full of love. It was directed at him. It was for him.

Of course he would recognise that look… It was the exact same look that he had, one that only appeared on his face when he looked at you. 

Not completely aware of what you had said, Joshua only picked up on the word “beautiful”. Beautiful. He didn’t think that that word could encapsulate how attractive he found you. But in his daze, while he was completely captivated by you, the word “beautiful” continued to be repeated in his head. It was the only word he could think of as he thought of you, and “you are” just slipped out before his brain registered what he should say in response to your remark. 

Stunned, your head snapped to look at Joshua. 

“Shua?” You asked, noticing his dreamy, dazed expression. 

Beautiful, Joshua thought, his eyes trailing down to stare at your lips which looked so inviting.  

Unable to control himself, Joshua removed his hand from your side, reaching upwards for your face. His touch as light as a feather, Joshua brushed his thumb against your face tenderly. While the feeling of his touch against your skin still lingered on, you felt him shift once again, only this time, he was gently pulling your head closer to his as he leaned towards your face slowly. Although his eyes were glazed over, you could see them flickering between your eyes, your face, and your lips. 

As you processed Joshua’s actions, time came to a stand still. You stood stiffly. Was this happening now? Was he going to kiss you? It’s not like you didn’t want to kiss him. Your heart yearned for Joshua’s touch, you yearned to be able to kiss him, to mold your lips to his. It was just a shock that Joshua was initiating it. 

Unconsciously, you closed your eyes, leaning into Joshua further until you could feel the outline of his face near yours, and until you could feel his warm breath. You both lingered in that position, each too hesitant to make the final move to connect your lips. 

Then, you felt your head being jerked forward. Joshua pushed your head towards his, just as he lunged forward. Before your brain registered the movement, Joshua’s lips were on yours. 

Just as Joshua’s lips reached yours in that electrifying kiss, all of Joshua’s feelings crashed down on him like a wave all at once. Your lips were so soft that Joshua wanted to melt into you, and he could taste the aftertaste of the honey filled desserts you liked on your lips. His heart fluttered, wanting more of you. He waited so long for this moment. 

But as he hungrily pressed his lips on your harder, he was immediately reminded of the fact that you couldn’t happen. The relationship between you and Joshua could not, and should not happen. It was dangerous. He already broke his own vow not to get close to you, not to fall for you. He wasn’t supposed to. Not falling for you, not interacting with you should have been the way. It was the best course of action to protect you. Fear filled his veins of what could happen to you if Nomia found out about you. The fear chilled him to the bone. You could be hurt, or worse. 

So, as fast as Joshua’s lips were on yours, as you felt the pressure of his lips on yours, they weren’t anymore. Your mind still hazy from the kiss, you opened your eyes when you felt Joshua pull away hastily. Dazed, you could only stare in confusion and hurt when you saw Joshua’s back turned towards you, his figure getting smaller and smaller as he ran through the rain away from you.

Your head reeled from the lingering feeling of Joshua’s lips on yours, and the cracks on your heart began to form. However, the moment you felt the world crashing down on you was when you vaguely heard his whisper of “sorry” floating through the wind. His voice crashing into you just as his hold over the water droplets broke, causing the harsh downpour to hit you all at once. 

Somehow, the pain and cold of the sudden rush of the howling wind, and the angry rain droplets pelting down on your skin didn’t matter to you. All you could feel at that moment was the unfathomable pain of your heart being shattered by Joshua as he left you there soaked in the rain, all alone. 

You didn’t know how long you stood there, alone under the pouring rain. You were numb to everything around you. Whether it was from the cold wind and rain pelting down on you, or the shock of Joshua kissing you and running away, you had no idea. At some point, everything went black. 

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

Ugh, everything hurt and it was cold. Your arms, your back, your legs, your head. Why was everything so painful?

You shifted, trying to make yourself more comfortable and to soothe your aching body and the pounding in your head. Snuggling closer underneath the sheets that lay on top of your body, you inhaled their familiar scent, trying to get as much warmth as possible so you could slip back into your slumber.

Wait… sheets? The last thing you remembered was being out in the field next to the creek. Your eyes shot open. Immediately, you groaned, shutting your eyes again, regretting your decision as the light from the room burned your eyes and made the pounding in your head worse. You clutched your head in your hands, moaning in pain. 

“I see you’re up. You’re at home by the way. You’re welcome. And you have a high fever. That serves you right for standing out there in the rain.”

You cracked an eye open slowly, hissing at the light and at the person that the voice belonged to, “Shut up Hao. I’m in too much pain for your snarky comments.”

Minghao walked over, setting a cup of water and a steaming bowl of soup on your nightstand. He sat down next to you on your bed, your bed dipping under his weight. He placed a hand against your forehead, muttering, “your temperature is still high, but at least you’re awake.”

You slapped his hand away weakly, “yea i got that from the excruciating ache in my body.”

Shaking his head, Minghao scolded, “Y/n. This is serious. You were unconscious for almost 24 hours. I had to keep sponging your body to bring your temperature down. Even then, it’s still there.”

You sulked at Minghao’s scolding, but allowed him to help you sit up so you could take your medication and eat some soup. 

Shivering when your body left the warmth of the blankets, Minghao scooted onto the bed, wrapping his arm around you, providing you with as much body heat as you needed. Spirits and Greek deities usually had a higher body temperature than humans. You refused to eat the soup, your stomach still feeling funny after waking up. Minghao sighed, knowing how fickle and fragile humans were when they were sick. Instead, he shoved the cup of water in your hands, asking you to sip on that. 

Snuggling closer to Minghao, you rested your head on his shoulders and closed your eyes. You had only been awake for a few minutes and you were already exhausted. 

Just as you were dozing off once again, Minghao’s voice startled you, “You know, when you didn’t return home last night, I got worried and went to find you. Mind telling me about why you were lying unconscious by the Iremia creek running a high fever when I found you?”

You shook your head. You were tired and you didn’t want to go into the whole story with Minghao. He would be mad at you.

“Does it have anything to do with someone named Joshua?”

You stiffened, peeling your head away from Minghao’s shoulder. You said firmly, “I don’t know anyone named Joshua.”

Minghao exhaled sharply, trying to contain his anger, “Y/n, don’t bother trying to hide it from me. You were unconscious for 24 hours, or rather for most of it. The times you were awake, you were delirious. You kept crying for this guy, Joshua, asking why he was leaving you.”

With that, the dam broke. Your emotions, already heightened from what happened with Joshua, and from being sick, all bubbled up to the surface at once. You wailed, tears flowing uncontrollably as you spilled everything to Minghao. You told him everything that happened from the time you met Joshua to that moment when he left you in the rain. You told Minghao about all your feelings for Joshua, how much you loved Joshua, how much you adored him, and how much it hurt when he left you. 

During your little venting session, Minghao simply sat there with you in his arms, rubbing your back comfortingly. He might not approve of your actions or the fact that you hid all this from him, but what was done is done. He couldn’t change any of that. All he could do now was to be there for you. 

When you were done, you sniffled, wiping your snot with the back of your hand. Minghao gave you a disapproving glance, handing you a tissue before speaking, “I think when you’re well and only when you’re ready to, you should go back and talk to Joshua.”

Hearing that, you opened your mouth to protest. Minghao shushed you, “Despite what he did, from the way you talk about him, how he acts around you, how he treats you, I believe he does truly love you. There has to be a logical explanation as to why he acted in that manner, and I think you should go and talk to him to find out what it is. One, it is a way for you to confront him. Two, if nothing else, trying to talk to him, whatever the outcome, be it good or bad, it will give you closure.”

Letting Minghao’s words sink in, you murmured, “I don’t think I can face the pain of being rejected again.”

At that, Minghao squeezed you reassuringly, “Only do it when you’re ready. On top of that, the way that things played out, you weren’t exactly rejected. It’s just my personal advice, and call me biased for being a spirit of opportunity, but I really think you take this opportunity to hash out your feelings for each other. You should go back and talk to him.”

“What about that creek being dangerous?”

Minghao hummed thoughtfully, “Well the risk is always going to be there. And you still went back after I warned you. Just be careful and let me know when you go back.”

“Hao… I really don’t know…” you hesitated. 

“Do you love him?”

Minghao’s question threw you off guard, but you answered instantly, “Yes.”

“I won’t force you, but if that is your answer, I think you should trust me on this. For now though, rest. I’ll be here if you need me.” 

Minghao slipped out of your bed, laying you back down gently. He pressed a kiss to your forehead, closed the blinds, and left you alone to your thoughts. 

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

You mused over Minghao’s advice for the next four weeks. The first week after, Minghao refused to let you out of the house, telling you that you really needed to rest. You didn’t try to fight him. You were too weak to venture too far from home, and you didn’t feel ready to try and confront Joshua yet. The wound he inflicted on your heart still felt too raw. 

Then came the second week, the following week, and the week after that. Although you completely recovered by then, you didn’t feel ready to face Joshua. You pushed down your intrusive thoughts of all the possibilities of what might happen if you confronted Joshua. All the positive outcomes, negative outcomes, and everything in between were forced to the back of your mind. You really did try your best to go about your life, returning to your normal routines, selling crafts in the market, and having tea with Minghao. 

But the ache and pain of what happened remained. For all the times that you tried not to think about Joshua, memories of him forced themselves back into your mind two times stronger. It was funny. In the past, you used to relish in the giddy feeling of thinking about Joshua whenever any little thing you saw reminded you of him. The crafts, the water puddles, picnic baskets. Now, they acted as swords impaling in your side, painful memories that you just couldn’t shake no matter how hard you tried. 

The weekends were especially hard. The days that used to be full of chatter with Joshua by the Iremia creek in your little oasis were now full of you just trying to fill the time by distracting yourself. You missed that field, the scenery, the calming sounds of the water, the serenity of it all. Most of all, you missed Joshua. Yes, he hurt you, but you loved him. Minghao was right. By not doing anything to confront Joshua, you were only prolonging your own pain. You wanted to see him. You wanted to cry and yell, asking him why he did what he did. You needed to. 

Finally, after four weeks of wallowing in your own self-pity, you steeled your nerves. You grabbed your things, left a note for Minghao, and ventured back to the field.

Pushing through the last of the heavy foliage from the forest, you emerged back into the field. Unlike the other times when you felt emotional reprieve coming here, you still felt nervous and jumpy. 

Honestly? You weren’t even sure that you would find Joshua here. You knew Joshua would always be nearby, this being the creek he presided over. But would he want to see you? Would he be willing to talk to you? What if he never wanted to see you again? You shook your head. There was no point in entertaining those worries right now. What mattered was that you were here, trying to reach out to Joshua. 

Looking around and still not finding Joshua anywhere, you lay out your blue picnic mat and made yourself comfortable. There was no reason for you not to enjoy the clear skies today though that wasn’t the primary reason why you came. Opening a book, you decided to immerse yourself in an alternative universe to distract yourself while you waited for any signs of Joshua. 

Simultaneously, Joshua was tiredly making his way back from his duties. These past few weeks have been trying. The moment when his lips touched yours kept replaying in his head, as did the moment that he ran off. He was frustrated. He couldn’t believe he did that. The least he could have done was to talk to you, leaving you with some kind of parting words before he ran off. But no. He tucked his tail and ran. That was all he was good at anyway, being a coward. He chastised himself. His whole life, all he did was run away from his problems and fears instead of facing them head on. And now he hurt you deeply because of his cowardice. 

Despite knowing that you needed time, and that you probably didn’t want to see him, Joshua continued to make his way back to the creek after his duties to see if you were there. To his disappointment, for the past few weeks, you were not. However, today, as he approached the creek, he saw a figure sitting quietly in the field. Fearful that his eyes were deceiving him, he rubbed them to check if it was really you.

His heart almost leapt into his throat when he confirmed that it was you. He shuffled around behind the foliage awkwardly. It was almost as if he was back at square one again, hiding behind the bushes, too scared to approach you. Part of him wanted to run to you. He missed you terribly. But the other part of him was too afraid to. He was worried you would reject him. Lingering around, Joshua continued to battle his thoughts.

Rolling your eyes, you looked up from your book in the direction of the bushes. You knew Joshua was there as soon as he approached. He wasn’t especially quiet, and since you knew that he always came from direction, you were specially keeping an eye out for any movement. You were hoping that he would come out and make the first move. Well, it looks like you were going to have to do all the heavy lifting today.

You stormed over to the bushes, brushing them aside harshly. Joshua yelped, surprised at your sudden appearance. He shrank backwards under your glare. Nodding towards the field, you put your hands on your hips, waiting for Joshua to walk out from the bushes. This time, Joshua tried not to trip as he obediently walked towards your picnic mat. He didn’t want to embarrass himself even further. 

Once you both settled down on the mat, there was an awkward silence between you. You twiddled your thumbs, wondering how to broach the subject. You hadn’t thought about what to say to Joshua before this. You didn’t actually think you would get this far. 

“Shua…”

“Y/n…”

You both started at the same time. Joshua clamped a hand over his mouth, shutting up to let you speak first.

You began, “Shua… I… I just…”

You cleared your throat. Unable to get the words out, you settled for asking him a direct question, “Why?”

Joshua hesitated. You were really just ripping the bandaid off. Not meeting your eyes, Joshua said softly, “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have kissed you.”

“No. What you shouldn’t have done was kiss me and then run away. Right now, I don’t care about the kiss. I want to know why… why did you run?” you stated, hurt lacing your voice.

Joshua grimaced at your tone, “I… we… we can’t be together. It’s wrong. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t even have gotten close to you. It’s my fault.”

“I think that doesn’t matter right now. It’s obvious we both like each other. So if you say that, then explain it to me. What’s so wrong about it?” 

“I can’t. Please Y/n, you wouldn’t understand. I don’t want to hurt you.”

You glared at Joshua, “Don’t assume I wouldn’t understand anything. How would you know that if you won’t even give me a chance by explaining things to me?”

You were furious. How could he? After everything, he still didn’t think you would understand? 

You knew it would be a low blow, but you said it anyway to drive your point home, “Well I suppose it’s too late now if you didn’t want to hurt me. I did get hurt. I got sick because of you. I collapsed because of you. Because you left me there. I think I deserve an explanation. Whether you like it or not, I’m not leaving until you tell me what’s going on.”

Joshua felt another wave of shame wash over him. In his attempt to spare you from the pain, he ended up hurting you more. 

Repeating his earlier words, Joshua said, “We can’t be together.”

Fed up, you spat, “Yes. I’ve got that part. But explain it to me. I’ve never heard of any rules that forbid humans from being with naiads.”

Joshua shook his head, muttering, “You’re right. There are no rules against that. If that was the case, it actually wouldn’t be as complicated. It’s not that. It’s just… I really can’t be with you. You’re in enough danger as it is right now for having spent time with me.”

You rolled your eyes, “So I’ve been told. What about it?”

“You’re aware of who Nomia is?”

You nodded. 

“I’m bound to Nomia, and not just in the way that weaker nymphs are bound to stronger nymphs. Right when I came into existence, as a male naiad, she claimed me as hers. Y/n, I’m promised to her. I’m supposed to marry her some years in the future. I can’t leave her, ever. The only way is for her to break the engagement, which would never happen. Don’t you see? You’re in danger. She’s possessive. She will hurt whoever dares come between me and her. Right now, that’s… you. That’s why… we can’t be together.” Joshua revealed, his voice getting louder with each word before faltering near the end. 

Your mind reeled. You took a minute to process all that information. He was engaged? No. It wasn’t a consensual engagement. He was promised to Nomia, probably as some power play. That was the wicked, infamous nymph that Minghao warned you about. You were beginning to see why Minghao warned you not to interact with any naiads in the area. 

Seeing that you were speechless, Joshua began to rise from his seat, “Y/n… darling… I love you. I really do. With all my heart. But we really cannot be together. We shouldn’t keep meeting either… You’re always welcome here. We just shouldn’t meet again. Ever.”

As he turned his back to you, you hand shot out. You grabbed his wrist, preventing him from walking away from you once again. 

In a low voice devoid of emotion, you said, “Who says I’m letting you go that easy?”

“Darling…” Joshua begged, gently trying to remove your hand from your wrist. 

You growled, “I wasn’t finished. What I meant to say was, if you think Nomia is going to scare me off, then you’re mistaken.”

Joshua’s eyes widened in fear, “Darling. Please. She’s very dangerous.”

“Then why don’t we run away? You’ve mentioned that some naiads can travel across all bodies of water. Let’s run. We can be together then? Isn’t that simpler?”

Shaking his head, Joshua explained brokenly, “Darling, I really can’t. I’m not that kind of naiad… I’m not powerful enough. If I leave this area for too long, I’ll die…”

Gripping onto Joshua’s wrist tighter, you pulled him back down to sit next to you. You sighed, “Well then, we’ll just have to keep meeting up here.”

“Darling…”

“I love you. My love for you is not going to change. And I’m certainly not letting some spoiled nymph ruin the love and the relationship that we have.”

Joshua’s eyes widened. He protested violently, “As much as I would love that, I can’t! We can’t! It’s dangerous. Y/n, I don’t have the power to protect you. I never have, and I never will. I’m weak…”

“You’ve told me this a thousand times before. You think I care? If I did, I wouldn’t be sitting here. So what if you’re weak? Powerful or not. I love you in your entirety, flaws and all. You’re imperfectly perfect. Shua. I’m not saying that we enter a romantic relationship, nor am I completely ruling that option out for the future. All I’m saying right now, is that we should continue to meet here.”

Smiling sincerely at Joshua, you noted, “Besides, being able to spend time with you. I think that’s worth the risk. You’re worth the risk.”

Then, more sadly, you added, “However, if you still think that you never want to see me again. If you think that is best, then I will respect your decision.”

Joshua lowered his head. He was terrified of what would happen if Nomia found out. But at the same time, he really loved you. The words that you spoke today, the reassurances that you did want to be with him, your firm conviction that he was worth risking your safety for, and your confession that you did love him too. 

Musing over your words for a while longer to weigh each option, eventually, his heart’s desires won out once again. He could never say no to you. 

Finally, after keeping you in suspense long enough, he whispered, “okay.”

With that, you broke out into a wide grin, launching yourself at Joshua and wrapping your arms around him. Nuzzling into his neck, letting yourself take in his comforting scent, you exclaimed, “Okay!”

Joshua melted into your embrace, leaning further into you. He really missed you. 

Speaking into your ear, he said, “Promise me this though. At any time that you’re not comfortable, tell me, and we’ll stop these meetings at once.”

Although you were about to protest, knowing that you could never be uncomfortable with Joshua, you agreed to put his mind at ease.

At once, Joshua placed a kiss onto your temple, murmuring with love and happiness, “Darling, I love you. So so much.”

Content, you replied, “And I, you.”

Deep down, you knew that there was another storm brewing, though you would try to weather that storm together with Joshua. You would fight for Joshua to the last moment, until you couldn’t anymore. There was no way in hell that you were going to let Joshua go now that you had him back. Together, you would be able to face whatever, and whoever came your way, come what may. 

Or at least, that was what you hoped, and perhaps you were a little too idealistic in your thinking… 

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 

Slowly but surely, you and Joshua fell back into your routine of meeting up by the Iremia creek on the weekends. Initially, after your emotional confrontation, things were a little awkward. You weren’t dating, already having decided that you both weren’t ready for that at this moment. On the other hand, now that the information that you both loved each other was thrown out in the open, it was impossible to revert back to your previous dynamic.  

Hence, you and Joshua eventually settled on being in this weird, transitory stage between friends to lovers. You acknowledged that you both weren’t platonic friends. With the kiss, you both crossed that boundary a long time ago. But you weren’t at the stage of being romantically involved lovers yet.

Currently, you and Joshua were just content being with each other. There was no better feeling than being able to spend time with the person you loved. You both treasured each second of it, knowing that there was always a possibility that you both would be ripped away from each other by the circumstances that Joshua was bound by. 

You sulked at the thought. Stupid Nomia and her stupid need for power and prestige. If it weren’t for her, you would have been happily dating the love of your life. Nevertheless, you tried to swallow the feelings of annoyance and anger. 

Instead, you chose to focus on the day that you just had with Joshua as you skipped along in the forest on your way home. You let out an embarrassed squeak thinking about it. It all began after lunch when Joshua presented you with a delicious smelling brown paper bag, mumbling something about how it was a fried doughnut made with honey…

Opening the bag, your eyes brightened and your mouth watered at the sight of the delicious looking doughnut. You squealed, thanking Joshua. You reached for one immediately, biting into it. As soon as you bit into the soft dough, the sweetness of the honey spread through your mouth, causing you to moan in happiness. These sweets were expensive and you only splurged on them during festival season so for Joshua to buy them for you, it was such a welcome surprise. While you did offer to share with Joshua, he said it was all for you. With that knowledge, you reached into the bag to pull out another doughnut. 

Joshua stared at you adoringly as you stuffed your face. Although you looked like a mess with honey smeared all over your face and fingers, Joshua still thought you were the prettiest person in the world. The trek to find the doughnuts and the price of them was worth seeing you enjoy the sweets with sheer joy plastered on your face.

Joshua choked back a laugh. You were chewing on your doughnut with your cheeks all full, making you look like a bunny. He didn’t understand how every single one of your actions could be so adorable.

Swallowing a bite of the doughnut, you asked, amused, “Why are you laughing? Is it because I have honey all over me?”

Nodding his head, Joshua began to chortle with laughter, “You look like a messy bunny.”

You scoffed, “You try eating these doughnuts. Just you wait, I’m sure you will look like a chubby deer.”

Joshua shook his head, leaning towards you, “Bunny, I highly doubt it. I would still look good. You on the other hand…”

His voice trailed off as he extended a hand towards your face, bringing you closer to his face. You felt the heat rising to your cheeks. Cupping your face, he wiped a smudge of honey that was on your lips before bringing it to his lips. He smirked, “Sweet… just like you… my sweet darling bunny.”

Remembering Joshua’s actions, you harshly rubbed your hot cheeks. This man… this naiad would be your cause of death. He was just too attractive for his own good, and ever since you told him you loved him, he’s been so flirty. One day, you were going to combust or blow a fuse. 

You exhaled, calming your rapidly beating heart. Continuing your journey home, you shivered slightly when a cold breeze rushed past you. Startled, your head snapped up. You looked around, alarmed. Taking note of your surroundings and finding absolutely nothing aside from the rows and rows of trees, you wrapped your arms around yourself, hastening your pace. Getting home wasn’t your top priority. Your priority was to get out of the forest and back to the main trails leading back to Athens. You hoped you would feel better once you reached an area where there were more people walking around. 

You shuddered. You were feeling horribly unsettled. Something about that breeze didn’t feel right. It was hard to explain, but somehow, that breeze didn’t feel natural. It was almost as if something swooped past you, as if someone was watching you. 

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

On the other side of the forest, there lay an expansive, extravagant looking palace built right into the side of the Nomia mountains. Going further into the palace, within the central atrium on a raised platform Nomia was sitting on a gold plated throne covered in crushed dark green velvet. 

Although she was lounging around lazily, playing with a mountain lion cub on her lap, there was no mistaking the powerful, ominous aura that she exuded. The double doors to the central atrium creaked open, and a small tortoise crawled in. The tortoise was trembling, its eyes trained to the ground as it approached the area before the platform. 

When the tortoise came to a stop, Nomia looked up to see who was the one that disturbed her downtime. Her face was devoid of any emotions. Her eyes narrowed, her gaze cold and calculating as she sized up the tortoise. Affirming the identity of the tortoise, a sinister grin spread across her face. 

With a wave of her hand, the tortoise was shrouded in a dark green mist. Opening its mouth, the tortoise spoke, “My lady, I have collected the information that you ordered me to find… should this information prove to be what you wanted, I trust you will hold up your end of our arrangement to return me to my original form?”

“Chelone, I don’t have all day. Tell me what you know before I lose my patience,” Nomia ordered.

“Like you suspected, your betrothed, Joshua, has been in the company of a mortal. According to the ravens I sent out, the mortal would visit Joshua every weekend. From their intimate behaviour, it seems that they have known each other for a while, and that they are in love.”

Her suspicions confirmed, through gritted teeth, Nomia seethed, “The nerve of that ungrateful naiad. He could have been with me, getting all the prestige, respect, and riches he could ever want. Yet he chose a pathetic mortal?”

In fury, Nomia crushed the glass of wine she had been holding, the wine splattering everywhere. The mountain lion cub on her lap let out a howl, scampering off in fear. 

Raising from her throne, Nomia brushed off the wine from her gown, “Well then. Where does this mortal reside?”

Slightly taken aback, Chelone stuttered, “Uhm… I believe the mortal resides at the edge of the Athenian capital…”

“Very well then,” Nomia said, turning to leave.

“My lady… your promise? You promised to return me to my human form if I collected the information for you,” Chelone interrupted.

Snapping her fingers, Nomia turned so she was facing the tortoise. Nomia chuckled evilly, “about that, I’m afraid I can’t make good on that promise.”

“BUT YOU PROMISED!” Chelone yelled, enraged. 

“What. Did. You. Say.” Nomia asked. The tone of her voice sent an overwhelming feeling of dread over Chelone.

Nomia strutted down from the raised platform over to Chelone. With each click of Nomia’s heels, Chelone’s eyes darted all over the atrium. Retracting her head into her shell, Chelone’s whole body cowered in fear. 

Nomia picked up the shell of the shivering tortoise with one hand. Raising it so Chelone was just below eye level, Nomia mocked, “Dear Chelone. I said I’m afraid I can’t make good on that promise. You were the idiot who refused to appear at Zeus and Hera’s wedding despite being summoned. It’s no wonder that Hermes turned you into this pitiful form. Really, I’m flattered that you came to me, thinking that I could reverse the spell. Unfortunately, even I can’t go against the will of a God. You understand, don’t you dear? You should be thankful that I was able to give you your speech back. That’s as close to your Oread form as you can get. Now, you really should leave before I lose my patience further. I hate to see what would happen if I squeezed your shell a little too hard.”

Dropping Chelone’s body, Nomia smirked as the tortoise scampered off hurriedly, “Now… what to do about that pesky mortal…”

Retreating to the darkness of her personal suite, Nomia shrugged her shoulders nonchalantly, “What’s there to think about? It’s simple. Retribution. That’s all there is to it.”

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

Rubbing a smudge of flour off your brows, you smiled proudly at the variety of freshly baked bread that you just pulled out of the oven. Since you were busy on weekdays, you usually elected to purchase bread from the agora where you worked instead. However, you closed your stall early today so you could bake something for Joshua. 

You clicked your tongue disapprovingly, thinking back to how Joshua recently sheepishly admitted that he didn’t really eat properly whenever he was alone. You had fussed and fretted over his confession. Despite his reassurances that he was fine, you promised to bake something for him. He deserved to be pampered a little, and at least with this spread, he would be well fed for the next week or so. You bounced on your heels excitedly. You couldn't wait to share the bread with Joshua when you saw him next. 

Fishing around your kitchen for some cloth to wrap the bread in, you were interrupted when you heard a harsh knock on your front door. Pausing to glance at the sundial that sat on your kitchen window, you saw that it was almost time for supper. You mentally smacked your forehead. You forgot that you had plans with Minghao for supper today. You were supposed to be at his house half an hour ago. 

Thinking it was Minghao at the door, you called out, “Hao? Just a minute. Let me get something and I’ll be right there.”

The harsh knocking continued. Irritated, you shouted, “Minghao! I said I’ll be right there.”

Your words proved to have no effect, and the knocks only intensified. You grumbled, setting down the pieces of cloth. You strolled over to the door, intent on scolding Minghao for being impatient when you saw him. 

When your hand gripped the door handle, you suddenly felt yourself being hurtled to the side roughly along with your door. You howled in pain as your back hit the wall. That was going to leave a mark. Your eyes snapped up in fury. What was Minghao thinking? He should know better.

You opened your mouth, about to yell at Minghao, but faltered when you saw who was standing in your doorway. Instead of Minghao, you saw a tall beautiful woman. There was no mistaking that she wasn’t human with the way that she carried herself. She had a fiery, menacing aura around her. 

Seeing you pathetically splayed out on the floor and in pain, she smirked, “Oh good, it looks like you’re already bowing down to me.”

You didn’t know who this woman was, but she was definitely dangerous. You needed to call Minghao. You gritted your teeth. The pain from your back was killing you. Slowly pulling yourself up, you steadied yourself using the wall. You seethed, “You know, I just had that door fixed. And go to hell. There’s no way I’m bowing down to anyone.”

The woman laughed haughtily, “You’ll be singing a different tune very soon my dear.”

You rolled your eyes, even her voice was grating. With your back against the wall, you inched closer to the coat rack in your foyer. There was an enchanted raven feather in the coat pocket. Minghao left it with you when you insisted on returning to the Iremia creek the last time, explaining that the feather had two functions. The first was so he could track you down if necessary. The second and the more important function, was that if you found yourself in any danger, you could brush your fingers against the feather and it would alert him that you needed immediate assistance. 

You regretted not listening to Minghao when he told you to keep it on your person at all times, though that didn’t matter right now. You just needed to focus on getting to it without alerting the woman. What you needed to do was to keep her busy.

“If you say so,” you mocked.

“Why you pathetic little….” the woman started, shaking her fist at you.

Cutting her off before she could finish her statement, you said, “Don’t you think I should know who you are? You did break into my house and throw me into a wall.” 

“You don’t know who I am?” The woman asks, incredulous that there is someone who wasn’t aware of her identity.

You raise a brow at her, “no? Am I supposed to?”

“ENOUGH!” The woman roars. She’s in front of you in a flash. She grips your collar, flinging you away from the wall. 

You land in the middle of your foyer, sputtering and coughing, trying to get as much air into your lungs as possible. 

Straightening her posture, the woman turns. Her condescending eyes laced with hatred trained on you. She stalks over to you, like a lioness hunting its prey. 

“You pathetic, ignorant mortal. I shall just have to educate you. My name is Nomia.”

She observes as your eyes flash with recognition, “So you have heard of me.”

You recoil slightly. This was Nomia? Joshua and Minghao were right. She was terrifying.

Concealing your fear as best as you could, you fiddled with the feather that you had managed to grab before Nomia flung you. You could only hope that Minghao would receive the alert. For now, you would have to stall her. You stared right into her eyes, saying sarcastically, “Of course I have. I’ve heard you’re a notorious annoying, wicked, selfish, conceited, power hungry bitch who has no regard for anyone else but herself.”

Nomia chuckled darkly, “You forgot to mention. I’m also beautiful and powerful.”

“You just proved my point.”

“You also forgot one other important thing. I’m Joshua’s betrothed. And as his betrothed, I order you to leave him alone for the rest of your life. I also order you to apologise to me, for trying to steal what belongs to me. He’s mine, and I don’t want him to be burdened with the likes of you.”

At her mention of Joshua, the memories of all the pain she caused him flashed through your mind. All the suffering Joshua went through because of her, and the suffering he would go through in the future because of her. He didn’t deserve to go through any of that. Your blood was boiling by now, and you snapped. 

You weren’t sure where the courage came from, but you were on your feet in an instant. You raised your hand, swiftly delivering a slap to Nomia’s face, your palm making contact with her cheek with a satisfying crack.  

“YOU DON’T EVEN DESERVE TO SAY HIS NAME. Joshua doesn’t deserve any of this. He doesn’t deserve to have to be bound to someone who doesn’t even love him. He doesn’t deserve to be with someone who only wants to use him for your own gain. You see him as someone who you can control and manipulate. You want to strut him around, showing off that you own the only male naiad in existence. He just wants to be free and happy. He deserves to be free and happy, with someone who loves him. And that’s certainly not you.” You growled.

Nomia’s eyes darkened further, “His desires and wants are of no consequence to me.”

Livid, you raised your hand to slap Nomia again. Just as your hand was about to make contact, she caught your wrist. She squeezed your wrist tightly, making you cry out in pain, “You know, for a pathetic mortal, you’re even dumber than I thought. Don’t you know that nymphs are vengeful creatures? You stepped between me and Joshua. You turned him against me, you tainted him with your mortal desires. You raise your voice to me, and then you dare to lay a hand on me? You will bow before me.”

Tears pricked the side of your eyes. You were aching and bruised everywhere. Your wrist was on fire. If Nomia squeezed any harder, she would break your wrist. You wanted to scream, to cry and yell. But, you refused to show any form of weakness to Nomia. You would not submit to her. You said, “I did nothing of that sort. It was your pursuit for power that turned him against you.”

Nomia twisted your wrist, looking pleased when she heard your scream. She leered, “Very well then. Since you still can’t get it into your brain that you should be wallowing at my feet for forgiveness right now. Just know that it was your own stubbornness that led us to this point. I shall have to punish you and Joshua for your actions against me.”

Your blood ran cold at the threat she issued next, “Perhaps I should strip him of his powers, or shall I mutilate him? He doesn’t need all his limbs to carry out his duties, nor his manhood for that matter since I am not marrying him for love or physical pleasure…”

“Stop! Don’t hurt him!” You cried desperately.

Nomia sneered at your reaction, “I wasn’t finished. I could do all those things… Or… you could take the punishment. You would let me punish you in whatever way pleases me most won’t you? After, you’ll never return to the creek, and you won’t interact with Joshua ever again. Agree to those terms and I promise I won’t hurt Joshua.”

Without hesitation, you made your choice. Resolutely, you said, “I agree.”

Within you, your heart was breaking. You failed to keep Nomia at bay. You failed Joshua. You had allowed your delusions that you and Joshua would be safe, happy, and in love for years to come overtake your senses. And you had convinced Joshua of that too. But ultimately, your delusions of grandeur were just that, delusions. You should have been more realistic. You whimpered, knowing that you were going to be forcefully ripped apart from each other. 

Your mind was reeling. While you were terrified of what suffering would befall upon you, you couldn’t let her hurt Joshua. He was too precious to you. You adored all of him from his mannerisms, his cheeky personality, and especially the love-struck behaviour that he only showed to you. He was finally happy… 

Nomia was right. You were just a mortal, a human. You couldn’t stand up to a powerful nymph. You were completely helpless in this situation. You couldn’t even guarantee that Nomia would keep her promise not to harm Joshua. You also knew that Joshua would continue to suffer at her hands in the future but you had to protect him as best as you could right now. You would do anything for him. Stilling your heart, you resigned yourself to your fate, muttering an apology to Joshua hoping that he would find it in his heart to forgive you one day for the choice you made. Even if you had to give up everything, you would protect him. 

Pleased with you choice, Nomia gaffawed, a wicked smile spread across her face, “so be it.”

She dropped your wrist, causing you to fall to the ground in a heap, cradling your broken wrist to your chest. Nomia waved her hand lightly around you. 

She nodded in satisfaction, turning to leave, only to find that her exit had been blocked by Minghao. 

His eyes travelled to you all hunched over and whimpering in pain on the ground. 

Flying into a fury, Minghao rushed to your side protectively. He boomed, “What did you do?”

Completely unphased, Nomia said, “Nothing much. I just put that mortal in their place. It’s as simple as that.”

“Leave. Leave before I call Seungcheol.” Minghao ordered, moving to usher Nomia out the door. 

Making her way out of your house, Nomia laughed deviously, “Despite being the God of time, even Seungcheol would not be able to reverse what I’ve done. Just try and reverse it, the spell will only hurt the mortal more. Enjoy the consequences of your poor choices. Ta ta!”

As she said that, you began to be shrouded in a dark green mist. The mist stung your eyes and burned your lungs, causing the tears you had been holding in now to run freely down your face. The mist continued to swirl and travel around you. The room began to spin. Your eyelids felt heavy. You fell onto the ground, unable to move. The last thing you saw before the mist completely consumed you was Minghao crying your name and running to you with an alarmed expression painted across his face. 

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

Something was wrong, Joshua thought. You were supposed to meet him 2 hours ago. You were never late. And with the exception of those few weeks when you were mad at him, you never missed a meeting with him by the creek. 

Pacing around nervously, Joshua continued to take frequent glances towards the forest that he always saw you disappear into when you left for home. For some reason, the forest looked even denser and darker than the last time he saw it. 

Joshua debated as to whether he should try to go into the forest to look for you. The forest was full of dangerous wild animals that would gladly devour a human if given the chance to. Or, he could be wrong. You could just be late. There was a first time for everything. Scoffing that he even entertained that thought, he made up his mind. He was going to go look for you. 

After stepping into the forest, Joshua’s quest to look for you was interrupted by the rustling of the foliage next to the creek. He turned, scurrying out to see who it was. He skidded to a halt, the blood draining from his face instantly as he laid eyes on Nomia. It would appear that you and Joshua were out of time. 

“What are you doing here?” Joshua demanded, glaring at Nomia. 

“I could ask you the same thing,” Nomia countered. 

Strolling leisurely over to Joshua, Nomia looked around, nodding approvingly of how beautiful the place was. 

Joshua burned with anger seeing Nomia stroll all over the place like she owned it. This was supposed to be your oasis, your refuge. How dare she sanctity of the place.

“You have no right to be here,” Joshua hisses.

Nomia strolls over to him, saying casually, “As your betrothed I do. The person who had no right to be here was that pathetic mortal. Y/n, was it?”

Joshua’s heart leapt into his throat. She knew about you?

Enjoying the sight of Joshua’s terror, Nomia grinned, “Oh? So I was right. Don’t worry now my pet. I’ve taken care of business. We’ll be left alone now. No one will come between us.”

“WHAT DID YOU DO?” Joshua roared.

Placing her hand on Joshua’s face, Nomia smirks, “Don’t worry about it pet. Mere mortals shouldn’t come between superior beings like us. I’ve taken care of it. Now, just be a good little pet and obey me, hmm?”

Joshua slapped Nomia’s hand away, “don’t touch me. I’ll only ask you once more. What. Did. You. Do.”

Nomia’s eyes darkened, she smiled sinisterly, “They laid eyes on what’s mine. In return, I simply made sure your beloved would never see you again. They were oh so obedient as well, agreeing to my terms as long as I agreed not to hurt you.”

Joshua stilled at her revelation. What did you agree to? He wasn’t worth whatever sacrifice you made… 

Letting out a gut-wrenching scream, Joshua lunged at Nomia, sending a powerful wave of water towards her. Deflecting the water with a small flick of her wrists, Nomia grabbed Joshua by his neck. Applying just enough pressure so he would feel her strength, but not enough to cut off his airways, Nomia sneered, “You’re certainly more powerful than before. But still not strong enough. I guess you already know that by now since you weren’t able to save your mortal. You should have heeded my advice not to engage with others. Really, it’s your own fault that your mortal is in such a state. Allow me to enlighten you on what transpired. Your mortal was on the floor, writhing in pain when I was through with them.”

Joshua scowls at her, trying to pull himself away from her, only to feel her grip tighten slightly. Nomia clicked her tongue, “I really wish you would all stop struggling. It’s beginning to bore me. Listen closely pet. Know your place. You’re my pet. I own you. You’re just a play thing to me, something I can use to gain more power and notoriety. Nothing more and nothing less. Still, you are somewhat useful so your safety is secured. Your mortal on the other hand… I wonder how much pain they can withstand?”

Squinting at Joshua, Nomia continues, “It’s your turn to make a choice. Stay by my side obediently, and I will leave your mortal alone. Refuse me and your mortal shall suffer a pain worse than death.”

Joshua glared at Nomia, clawing at her hands until she let him go. Gasping for breath, Joshua growls, “I will never love you.”

Nomia looked at Joshua with disdain, “I’m not demanding your love. That’s worthless to me. I’m demanding your submission and obedience.”

Joshua clenched his fist. He was exhausted from being pushed around by Nomia. Sadly, his hands were tied, he had no choice. Nomia played you both. She used you both as blackmail for the other. But why was it that only you seemed to be suffering? He cursed himself. He really was cursed. Instead of bringing you the love and life you deserved, all he brought you was pain. 

Shaking in anger, Joshua countered, “How would I know that you won’t harm them? I can’t take your word for it. I would need hard proof.”

“You’re in no position to demand anything. But if it will appease you so you do not keep struggling against me, I’ll allow you to visit your mortal every full moon just to see for yourself that they remain unharmed until the day they pass. Mortals live such short lives… Of course, that is on the condition that you’re a good, obedient pet. You will take a guard with you, and you’ll agree not to interact with your mortal.”

Her conditions were more generous than Joshua expected. While he would never be able to interact with you or feel the comfort and love of your embraces ever again, at least he would be able to see you. As long as he had the knowledge that you were safe, he would grit his teeth and live through whatever Nomia demanded of him. 

Musing over Nomia’s terms, Joshua relented, “Fine. However, should there be a moment where you break your promise, our agreement is off.”

Nomia nodded, “Fine.”

Thinking back to the state she left you in, Nomia grinned, “Actually, as a gesture of good faith, I shall allow you to interact with your mortal one last time. You may visit them right now. No guard, no strings attached. You just have to report to my palace tomorrow morning. I have an important meeting with the other Oreads and I require an escort.”  

Joshua perked up at that. Her offer seemed too good to be true, but he wasn’t going to turn down the last chance he would ever have to talk to you, to listen to your melodic voice. He just wanted to hold you in his arms one last time. He also wanted nothing more than to break down and apologise to you for his inability to protect you. He hurriedly took the slip of paper containing your address from Nomia and took off in the direction of your house.

Watching Joshua run off, Nomia licked her lips sadistically, muttering to herself, “Of course, you will come to realise that both of my offers are a double edged sword once you lay eyes on your beloved mortal. Let this serve as both a threat and a reminder of what might happen should you break our agreement.”

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

Coming to a stop in front of your door, Joshua raised a hand to knock, only to find himself unable to. It was as if an invisible force was stopping him. Joshua brought his fist down, leaning his head against your door. He could hear voices inside. You were obviously home, and you had company over.

Then it dawned on him. He was terrified and ashamed at the prospect of facing you. He had run all the way here because he wanted to see you, but never stopped to think about whether you wanted to see him. He had put you through so much, and he didn’t even know what Nomia did to you. He failed to protect you. He failed you. Perhaps this was not a good idea after all. Joshua began to pace around your front door, fretting over what your reaction would be to seeing him. 

Meanwhile, inside your house, Minghao was taking frequent, sneaky glances at the door. He felt the presence of a naiad outside, concluding that it was probably Joshua. Honestly, Minghao wanted to storm out and give Joshua a piece of his mind. But he didn’t want to alarm you. You were still recuperating from your encounter with Nomia the other day. He had brought Seungcheol to see if the spell could be undone. Alas, it was as Nomia said, if Seungcheol tried to reverse time on you, the spell would only come back and harm you more. 

Minghao was furious at this turn of events. He hated that you had to experience this much pain. He was furious with Joshua for being the reason why you were suffering, Nomia for being the cause of your suffering, Seungcheol for not being able to help. Most of all, he was furious with himself. He was the one who encouraged you to take the opportunity to go to the creek in the first place. If he never did that, if he never continued to encourage you to make amends with Joshua, none of this would have happened. Filled with regret, Minghao swore that he would protect you, and that he would nurse you back to health.

Minghao breathed in deeply, there was no point in losing his temper now. He should be focusing on you. Turning his attention back to the tea he was brewing, Minghao concentrated on stirring the tea leaves in the teapot. 

“Joshua’s here isn’t he?” 

Your voice startled Minghao, causing him to drop the spoon he was holding. It fell against the tea pot, the sound resonating through your house. There was a pregnant pause before Minghao sighed, “Yes. He’s outside.” There was no point in lying to you or sheltering you from that knowledge now. 

“Hao please…” You pleaded, hesitant to continue with your request. Even if it was only for a moment, you needed to speak to Joshua. 

Minghao walked over to you, squeezing your shoulder reassuringly, “Yea. I’ll get him. I’ll be outside keeping watch. Take as long as you need.”

You swallowed the lump in your throat, nodding appreciatively at Minghao. 

Minghao threw the door open, catching Joshua off guard. Joshua stared at Minghao in shock. Minghao walked out, leaving the door open behind him. 

Minghao spoke softly, “I take it you’re Joshua. Y/n has spoken about you a lot. Look. I don’t know how much you know, probably almost everything, judging from your reaction. Whatever it is, just know that they have been through a lot because of you.”

Glancing in the direction of the living room to indicate where you were, Minghao ushered Joshua inside before shutting the door and standing in front of it protectively. 

Gulping, Joshua took a few steps into your house, pausing in front of the entry to your living room. He saw you sitting on your couch, leaning against the headboards with your eyes closed. Your breathing was steady, as if you were sleeping. He took in your appearance, the dark circles under your eyes, the bandage around your wrist, and the bruises that littered your body. He felt himself shaking again. Nomia really hurt you. 

He gingerly approached you. He called softly, “Darling? It’s me…” only to gasp and recoil in horror at what he saw when you opened your eyes. 

Joshua had tried to brace himself for what he might see. He thought your tender, love filled gaze would be replaced by one that was burning in hatred for him. But nothing, nothing, could prepare him for this.

Your bright eyes, the ones that he loved gazing into for hours, the ones that captured his attention all those months ago, the ones that twinkled under the sunlight, sparkled under the reflection of the water from the creek’s surface, the ones that always looked at him like he created the entire universe. Your eyes he loved so much, they were gone, replaced by dull, lifeless, cloudy irises. He recognised the thin dark green shimmer around your irises. There was no doubt that you were under a permanent curse by Nomia. 

Reality started to sink in, and Joshua cradled his head in his hands helplessly, his heart shattering.

You had been blinded. You were now blind. And it was because you were trying to protect him. 

Joshua dove to your side, crumbling onto the ground in a heap in front of you. He wailed into your lap, repeating the words, “I’M SORRY” over and over. His body shook as sobs racked his body. Tears fell down his cheeks uncontrollably, soaking your clothes. Completely distraught and on the verge of hyperventilating, Joshua grasped at your clothes desperately, as if fearful that you were about to disappear and slip through his fingers. 

Feeling around, you rested your hand on top of Joshua’s head, running your fingers through his hair to soothe him. His hair was getting long. If he wanted to keep his undercut, he would need to get a haircut soon. It was odd. Despite the room being filled with the sounds of Joshua’s sobs and your clothes being soaked with his tears, you felt oddly empty. Perhaps it was because you had no more tears left to cry, having spent the last few days in Minghao’s embrace as you cried from the traumatic  experience.

Finally, Joshua’s sobs died down, though his body was still trembling. Tracing the outline of Joshua’s face until you could cup his face in your hands, you tilted his head upwards so he was now looking at you from his position on the floor. Softly, you began, “Shua…”

Cutting you off, Joshua blubbered, “Darling... I’m sorry. I failed to protect you… I failed you…”

Gently, you wiped the stray tears that rolled down his face, “Shua… it’s okay. As long as you’re safe, I… I’m at peace with my decision.”

“It’s not fair! Why did you do it? WHY? I could have… I would take any punishment if it meant you were safe,” Joshua whimpered.

“That’s exactly why I did it. I love you. I couldn’t let you get hurt. You have so much more of your life to live. You shouldn’t have to be burdened with this curse. It’s okay love.”

“NO! It’s not. It should have been me,” Joshua cried.

You sighed, there was no way you could console him now. Joshua was too consumed by grief and regret. Shifting yourself so you were on the floor next to him, you wrapped your arms around him. However, your actions only made him begin to sob again. 

Your heart cried out, aching at the sounds of his sobs. With tears beginning to prick your eyes, you tried hushing him gently, “Shhh… It’s okay… Shua…”

“I couldn’t save you,” Joshua whispers brokenly.

You swallowed a sob, your voice breaking at how broken and exhausted he sounded, “But you already did. You’re my Joshua. My Shua. You’ve lived up to your name. You’ve provided me with so much salvation and solace during whatever time we spent together. I was really, really happy when I was with you and I’ll treasure those memories forever.”

“It’s not fair. The world is too cruel…” Joshua managed to choke out.

You fought back your tears. You had to remain strong for him, to ease his guilt and pain. You replied, “The world is indeed cruel, but I’m so glad that even in this cruel world, I managed to meet you. I love you. I always have and I always will.”

Joshua shook in your arms, “I love you too. Only you. You have my heart and soul, now and forevermore.”

Sniffling, Joshua pulled away from you, affirming resolutely, “I’ll still visit you. I promise.”

“And I’ll know when you do.”

“How?” Joshua asks, wiping his tears to stare at you wide eyed.

You chew the insides of your cheek for a moment. You point at your nose, “You smell like petrichor, the smell of the earth after it rains. It’s always stronger whenever you’re near.”

Smiling reassuringly at Joshua, the corners of your eyes still crinkling as you teased, “I might have lost my sight, but my other senses are stronger than ever now.”

Through his tears, Joshua smiles back at you adoringly, “I think it’s a little too soon for that joke darling…”

With that, Joshua’s lips quivered once more, “I love you.” 

Whispering in response, you replied, “I love you too.”

Guiding your hands up to his shoulders, you brought him into your embrace again. This time, you both squeezed each other tightly, afraid of letting go. Feeling the sobs wreck through Joshua’s body, your resolve broke. You allowed your tears to fall down your cheeks freely. You both knew this would be the last time you would ever be able to embrace each other like this. So, you both held each other as you wept on the floor of your living room, mourning for the loss of your sight and for the loss of each other. 

At some point, you and Joshua fell asleep in each other’s embrace, completely exhausted and out of tears. When you woke again early the next morning, you shivered, not feeling Joshua’s warmth next to you. The only thing your senses could identify was the strong, lingering scent of petrichor and a familiar leather bound book on the floor right next to your bandaged hand. You touched the engraving on the cover, recognising it as the book of quotes you had lent Joshua all those weeks ago. As you continued to run your fingers over the cover, you felt something pillowy and soft. You recognised the flower immediately. How could you not? This flower grew by the Iremia creek, and you spent plenty of time making flower crowns out of this with Joshua.

You gripped the flower gently, clutching it to your heart. You hunched over, covering your mouth to muffle your wails. Joshua had left you with a forget me not flower. 

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

And so, your relationship with Joshua came to a close. But for years to come after, until the end of your days, Joshua took advantage of his agreement with Nomia and made good on his promise. Every full moon, he would visit you, watching you lovingly from a distance. It soothed his heart a little to know that you had eventually recovered and that you were safe, though nothing could ever fix the jagged hole in his heart and soul made by the choice he was forced to make, the one which forced him to walk away from the person he loved more than anything in the world. 

On your end, you tried to return to live your life as normally as you could. However, you knew whenever Joshua visited you. The strong scent of petrichor that wafted and lingered through the air was indicative of that. Inhaling the scent was comforting. You were comforted with the knowledge that Joshua was still watching over you, and that he still loved you. Yet, the scent of petrichor also made your heart ache. It served as a painful reminder of your time with Joshua, and how your love was real, but how life’s circumstances tore you both apart, forbidding you from being together. 

𓇼 ༄ ᨒ .𖥔 ݁

ᨒ Petrichor (noun): the scent of the earth after rain. Some would describe the scent as distinctively earthy, pleasant, and sweet. But to you and Joshua, the scent would remain as a constant reminder of where your hearts were, where your home and family was, where you could take refuge, who you could take refuge with, the love that you had shared, and the love that could not be. 

taglist: @weird-bookworm @wonijinjin @babyleostuff @wishing-fieshes @kwanienies @mayashu @megseungmin @porridgesblog @haecien @mirxzii @scoupsofcherries @eightlightstar @brownsugarbaybee @zaggprincess2 @nonononranghaee

petrichor taglist: @amoryeonjun @hipsdofangirl @valenhui @yoonzinoooo @fantasies-of-a-bookworm @shuasdraftsalt

[rrat-king]

walk with me bird,,, thinking about kristen's lack of self preservation especially in sophmore year- she does crazy shit again and again and it is funny but like. when you actually look at it, its like this elaborate performance. so much going on in kristen's brain, losing her family, (we know she's clearly still thinking about it with the start of sy being her returning to her brothers) losing her religion and then recreating it and still feeling lost.

all her life being full and told that this is the thing- that will protect you as long as you are good so kristen is good and then realizes oh. i was meant for something terrible actually, my church who vowed to protect me is actually trying to make me a hellmouth. like oh. great well i dont feel safe in that anymore, im always arguing with my parents because even they are still polluted with their religion but she lets it go she tries to find something else. and then she ends fy with her new religion and immediately doesnt like it, over the summer it still doesnt click and she changes it again, she puts her faith or even lack of it at the forefront as she does these insane choices, like a leap of faith. like oh someone has got to save me if i do this- surely someone will. (also pushing my agenda of kristen's faith eventually forming into believing in her friends bc they are the ones who always save her not the gods even though i do love cass)

like ally talking about chaos not being cute anymore really makes me think of all this- because it's like kristen being like oh well if it goes wrong than at least it's some sort of relief from this pressure of being something and at least im not plagued with thinking about not being good enough for my own parents. like her being so not aggressive but trying to counter sandralynn too- like not wanting to view her as a parental figure but as a person. kristen like almost tries to parent her in a way which sounds weird but its very like she can't turn it off in her head because she's been raised with expectation so she does feel on the same level as adults when in reality she is not but kristen believes like oh i can solve this here maybe u shouldnt be doing this thing in her relationship. i think part of it is kristen not wanting to see a parent become better and then have to wonder why her's didn't. like was she not enough for them to want to me better. it's so complex i adore kristen's character and it kinda surprises me how often she becomes very 2d in the fandom but alas, many thoughts about her

i am absolutely walking with you. i love what your talking about with her dynamic with sandra lynn (which. i will always be crazy about her and sandra lynn they are just both so intersting in thier relationships) but yeah it makes a lot of sense that she doesn't know how to properly interact with her if you think about the amount of pressure she has been given to be a spiritual leader through church or if you hc her as a parentified older sister to her little brothers (which i do personally) so she's not thinking about her interaction with sandra lynn as like, a regular adult cuz she hasn't really had those interactions before, especially when it comes to an adult not trusting her.

and i think that's why she just feels so insane in sophmore year, jsut like, she's going from something super rigid to something where it feels like she can do anything and that's fucking scary. like she has a place to stay but she doesn't really have any parents to answer to, she has a god but she has so much doubt it doesn't feel reliable, all she really has as stability is her friends and her girlfriend, and i feel like she is just incredibly reckless cuz like, she's doing better but its almost like she has nothing to lose? but she does. and she did, and i think that was what beardsley was saying about the chaos not being cute anymore, like kristen was acting like she was invinvible at times and that not only got her hurt, but also those around her, and im excited to see how she grows from that.

[spacexseven]

OHHHH TUNA I HAVE FINALLY BEEN ABLE TO READ UR ANSWER TO MY ASK U ARE SOOO GENIUS and now im VERY curious to hear about ur mermaid chuuya thoughts, if you happen to have any on hand? and since dazai has been ruled out as our siren, who do you think would fit better? maybe chuuya could do it? fyodor kinda seems like the type to me as well. hm siren! chuuya/fyodor and a pirate captain reader.... imagine the tension.

I am so messed up about ur sea monster dazai interpretation what a little aquatic asshole.... I've been thinking of a slight alternate scenario where he might get a bit ahead of himself in his excitement to eat darling, they get just a bit too close and smell SO good. can you really blame him if he goes for the kill a little earlier than planned? but, alas, his little human actually manages to get away from him! him!!!! of all sea creatures this human actually managed to wiggle out of HIS claws! his ego is pretty bruised for a while (as well as his FACE you KICKED him and it REALLY HURT and he thinks it was a bit uncalled for honestly) but then he actually does start to feel lonely, for the first time. not the fake sad fishie routine he pulled on you, genuinely alone. you Were pretty interesting to talk to, he supposes.... and kinda cute, for a human. it rubs salt in the wound when he can occasionally see you walk near the water, hiding behind some human, not daring to venture too near. maybe at first, you fear was funny to him and he'd threateningly flick his tail in the water to watch u lock up, but now if he sees you he goes completely still, wondering (hoping) if you'll get closer. you never do.

anyway, imagine sea monster dazai realizing he has feelings for u and trying to win u back, to very little avail. why do all his presents he leaves for you on the shore scare you? isn't bringing your mate things you've hunted for them a standard courting practice in most species? I mean, he eviscerated them, sure, but don't humans PREFER when fish have their organs and heads removed? hes really not sure what hes not getting right here. what do you MEAN slaughtered sharks aren't gonna work, chuuya?he thought grand gestures were the way to go, should he go for something even bigger? meanwhile ur SHITTING yourself thinking that this awful creature you barely escaped from is gonna crawl up on shore and turn u inside out. well, I mean, you're half right. figuring out how to walk among humans and find you himself IS the next step hes considering, if you keep being stubborn.

- 🩹

AQUATIC ASSHOLE you know i have a huge soft spot for alliteration i love it so much this makes me so giddy

cw yandere characters (chuuya, fyodor, dazai), obsessive behavior, mentions of dismemberment, stalking

here's the thing about siren chuuya...he's literally irresistable. it's not just his singing voice or his pretty eyes or his overall perfect existance—something about him is almost addictive to people. even he doesn't know what part of him it is that makes people swoon so hard for him. so when he meets a regular little human (that is actually the captain of a pretty big ship. he is impressed.) who just Doesn't Care about him, it hurts his pride and goes against his very existance. it makes no sense!

and because chuuya can't have other mers knowing about this and his indisputed title of Best Siren Ever to be taken away, he starts following you around. a lot. what he doesn't know is that he's not the only siren you've got on your tail. from somewhere far away during one of your adventures, you caught the attention of another reknowned siren, because again you didn't seem to be affected by his charm either. no amount of singing or spells or staring into your eyes changed your feelings towards fyodor and it won't change anything towards chuuya either.

so they're left with only one other option.

making you fall for them the human way.

which also means no underhanded tactics, no singing (not that it had any effect on you before) and no contacting any sea witches to help. what they could do was try to court you like humans did each other.

every morning you wake up and you find unnaturally huge fish gutted and waiting for you cook, priceless items from deep under the sea (you're sure, one time, that that was a bag of real gold coins waiting for you), and a few times even dismembered hands and feet. that was a terrifying sight, even for you. coincidentally you'd find out someone who was giving you trouble just happened to lose a limb or two that same day...

it's very likely dazai will lose his patience and try to eat you (very literally) before he realizes he kinda wants to keep you whole. just another day on your boat talking to your poor little victim sea monster friend and all it takes is for you to come a little too close and leave your hand on his claw for a little too long before he's snatching you and dragging you over the side of your boat and into the cold water (his waters, where nobody would help you, little human) ignoring the way you scream and struggle, using his unnaturally strong limbs to hold you in place while he goes for a bite. what he doesnt expect is for you to jab him in the eye, so hard he's sure it will look all ugly and swollen, before scrambling back onto your boat and going back to shore. damn motorboats and their violent little propellers.

and then you don't come back.

he gives you some time, thinking maybe you got a little bruised up and needed the rest (though he would happilly nurse you back to health if you had asked). but you don't show your face near the water for days and days on end, until even he knew it was far too long to be just because you were injured.

it comes to him through the form of chuuya (who considered himself a master at understanding human behavior, having spent a lot of his time around them, watching them gush over him) that you were probably scared of him. which was really nothing new, anyone with any survival instinct would know to be scared, but when it was you who had been so genuine and unbothered by his demeanor, he was a little distraught.

maybe he should apologize.

it was hard when you rarely came near the beach except when you were with someone else, but he managed to leave gifts for you after waving at you, pretending to not see the grimace on your face or the way you shrunk into yourself.

it was even more painful when you just ignored the things he left for you, no matter how much stuff he left or how luxurious of a gift he left, you would just ignore it. he wondered if he deserved such treatment. how was he to know you would get scared so much?

and you wouldn't even let him explain himself. how was he going to apologize if you didn't hear him out? he didn't have any bad intentions, really.

well, if you weren't going to approach him, then he'd have to approach you, right? luckily, he knew some people who owed him some favors—favors big enough to even change his form temporarily.

[cazort]

Life Hack: Red Lentils Improve Your Physical & Financial Health

If you do not regularly eat red lentils and you are not allergic to them or otherwise unable to eat them, and you want to experience an immediate improvement in your quality of life, health, and financial situation, you need to know about red lentils.

You can buy these dried for like $2.20 for a pound, or cheaper.

But here's the kicker. They are so easy to cook, even easier than regular green or brown lentils. They are a great lazy food, so easy that they are almost like an instant meal.

Unlike most dried beans, you don't need to soak them. Like, you need to rinse them, but that's it. Like put some in a bowl, cover with water and mix them until they all sink to the bottom, then pour off as much of the water as you can without spilling them. That's it. You rinsed them. They are now ready to cook.

Now you cook them by boiling them in a pot. They cook in 10 minutes. Unlike green lentils which take more like 40 minutes if not soaked. Only 10 minutes and they're soft. If you want them firmer you can cook them shorter, like 8 minutes.

They are so forgiving. I don't even measure the water, like if you put more water in, they come out thinner and soupier. Less water, they come out thicker like a stew. You can cook them less than 10 minutes or more and they will still taste great.

They are incredibly nutritious. If I'm having them as the main thing for dinner, I eat about 1/2 cup dried which turns into maybe about a cup cooked, depending on how much water I added. This much has:

23 grams of protein

36% of your fiber

41% of your B1

23% B6

49% of your Folate / B9

139% Copper

39% Iron

13% Magnesium

14% Potassium

31% Zinc

240mg Omega 3 fat (ALA) or about 15-22%

Pretty much no unhealthy things for most people.

These nutrients are a big deal. A lot of people are deficient in folate, iron, magnesium, zinc, and some in copper, so these are hitting a bunch of common nutritional deficiencies. And they're so high in iron and Folate, B1, and Zinc that if you eat these you're unlikely to end up with a deficiency in any of these nutrients.

And just to let this sink in, this is more protein than 3oz of chicken. And that $2.20 container? It contains 5 servings like the one above. The protein cost about 2 cents per gram which is incredibly cheap as protein sources go. The protein quality (in terms of balance of amino acids) is better than some beans too, i.e. it is relatively more complete than a number of types of beans.

I also love how I feel after eating these. Like sometimes eating too many beans gives me gas. But not these, when I buy dried red lentils and cook them like described above, I feel light and energetic and have no problem with gas.

There is strong evidence that eating lentils is protective against heart disease and cancer so they can help you live longer too.

You can also add so many things to them. The basic thing is to add just the right amount of salt, but when I'm cooking them, I like to add olive oil, spices, herbs, and also dice up some carrots and other vegetables, even something like broccoli. Because they cook fast, you want to dice stuff up into small cubes if you throw it in, so the other ingredients will also cook fast.

I wish I had discovered this food earlier in life. I have been eating lentils for years but for some reason never tried the red ones and never realized they are so much easier to cook. Yeah, other ones are great too but they cook much slower and thus require much more time/effort.

[aewrie]

rambling about grimm hcs/au lore. and i mean rambling

my hc is that grimm adores kids & cares about them a lot, and i will die on that hill. like, if he were a regular guy with regular guy aspirations he'd love to be a kindergarten teacher. or run an art/craft club or such. something where he'd get to he'd get to spent time with kids, and encourage them to be creative and weird.

he doesn't hand grimmchild over to the summoner because he doesn't care, but because it's a necessary part of the ritual; the rare occasion where things do go wrong aside, he knows it's for the better, for the child to travel with the summoner. it allows him to rest before he burns (something he desperately needs, because once the child is in the picture, he is actively dying). it allows the child to experience things and grow beyond the scope of the troupe.

he is so protective of his child. yes, it is his reincarnation, but even if it wasn't, he would be. he was ready to die for the child when he did not realize what it was, when he did not want to be responsible for any child at all and was freaking out about the whole thing until he got too depressed about it to be freaking out. he was miserable, had nothing to gain from the situation as far as he knew, and the #1 priority was still the child.

(though, once he knew, and especially once he had trauma related reasons to be extra vigilant? yeah he might have overreacted to some truly, really, genuinely not-a-big-deal situations a few times.)

also, if an actual child did show up for his ritual somehow, he'd rather burn himself alive than go through with it. he can improvise with the ritual when circumstances are less-than-ideal and he cannot find a replacement summoner on short order, though it's not fun for anyone involved. least of all him. the course of action he would take is to find a home/caretaker for the child, gather what flames he can with the troupe's assistance, and torch himself. very much preferably in that order, so the kid wouldn't need to deal with him dying and whatnot; it is not a pretty thing to witness, even indirectly, and he will need more of an adjustment period after. not the best time to be dealing with a stray child.

just, him going up against a child (combat prodigy or not) for his own gain does not fit into the picture at all.

(i started this typing this whole thing bc i realized this specifically is a part of why child ghost bothers me so much lmao. and then i started going off on tangents)

(maybe he did do a double-take when someone tiny waltzed in, but i also think a great amount of variety in size depending on species just makes sense for bug people. and canon does have that kind of variety, too! regular mortal adults range from sly to old stag wait i forgot about bardoon he's the hugest actually, kids from millybug to marmu (these two are spirits but the sizes appear to reflect what their physical bodies were, given we have markoth and galien with actual corpses to compare to). it'd be really awkward and rude to assume shit based on size alone, i feel, if you can't clearly tell based on other features.)

grimm would also be very interested in an explanation as to how and why a child came his way in the first place.

basic rundown: there's these bugs who live apart from the troupe, keeping watch for dying kingdoms and potential summoners. the bug we dreamnail in the cave? was supposed to choose a summoner from amongst survivors, travelers, what have you. it would have been their job to set up and to light the lantern; and also to explain the task at hand and to guide the summoner to the troupe. from there, grimm handles things. alas, the bug died before they could fulfill their duty. good thing ghost had the dreamnail.

speaking of: if the dreamnail is a moth artefact associated with radiance only, it makes no sense for grimm to rely on it for his ritual. he either would have to have alternative means to achieve the same effect that all summoners can utilize, or do something else by default. in my version, no dreamnailing required. when things go as planned, at least.

when the ritual nears its end, conventionally, the nightmare king will find the summoner in their sleep, not the other way around. individuals with unusual skills or tools to reach dreams exist, thought they are rare. so while it was a surprise, it wasn't too odd for ghost to just pop in unexpectedly rather than being 'invited' (read: the nightmare king has found you! now it's time for the asskicking).

the summoner will be allowed into grimm's chambers, because the proximity makes things easier, but that's optional. not everyone can easily fall asleep when he's right there. some manage, and then wake up when they get trounced, and cannot relax again until they get some distance to grimm.

[inkofamethyst]

December 23, 2023

November/December is kind of screwing me up a little because money anxiety (which I feel like I'm definitely exhibiting signs of) makes me want to maintain consistently high saving levels each month, including my "bonus savings" at the end of every month. By most/all accounts, I'm literally doing fine when you consider my age and the fact that I'm in graduate school. I need to write this out to remind myself that not having "bonus savings" at the end of this month does not mean I did not save anything for this month. This should be obvious, but alas. I do all of my monthly saving (for all goals) at the beginning of the month and have consistently (even this month !!!) allocated a relatively big chunk toward my brand new Roth to get it off the ground. So it's okay that gifting has limited the amount leftover for "bonus savings" because I'm still very much on track to reach my goals before the mostly arbitrary deadlines I set for myself.

God, sometimes the overachiever energy is just too much. It feels like.. like a cavity. Like how too much sugar without proper cleaning will lead to a cavity and potential infection, maintaining overachiverness without regular reminders of how I'm doing in reality will lead to that awful "never good enough" feeling because I keep raising an arbitrary bar to keep it ever out of reach to maintain the sense of a "challenge".

So, to reiterate, it is fine and okay to not have much in the manner of bonus savings, as long as I 1. saved at the beginning of the month and 2. did not actually spend more than I earned that month (emergencies and planned purchases excluded).

[edit: I'm also ever thankful for familial help financially actually because it's only due to their assistance that I've been able to save so aggressively these past few months without ever worrying whether I was going to be able to buy food or something (campus events with free food are also helpful). I mean I still clip coupons and watch for sales but if I want to be a little frivolous and buy frozen dumplings or something I still can, you know? I mean yes, sure, I could probably still get by without their help on my stipend, but the fact that I have help means that it may not be a totally financially ruinous decision (in a year or so, I'm sure, I will have settled into a comfortable routine and will not be as nervously obsessive over all of this, but what am I if not a bundle of obsessive nerves).]

Today I'm thankful that the discord chat gathering I hosted yesterday went really well!!! I haven't hosted anything big at my house in eight years and of those who came (all seven of us in the same place for the first time since 2019--four years!!) only my dnd-friend had actually been in my house before lol. I was lowkey anxious about hosting but my parents helped me set up a lot so I'm thankful for that too. We had a potluck which was lovely and we chatted and played games and it was just nice to see everyone again without having to work around a time zone spread of eight hours (though that's going to last for at least a couple more years). (Also thankful that the two dishes I tried for the first time went really well! Love adding new foods to the arsenal.)

Working on mini twists, should all be done tonight or tomorrow. It'll be nice to have them back in but the shrinkage is still crazyyyyy. Like my hair is def mid back length (though in need of a trim) but if I let it be after washing then it looks like it's three inches, and even with twists in it barely reaches my neck. I want a silk press so baddd. May have to add another savings goal for a $200 silk press at a salon somewhere near my school :/ UGH but I haven't been to a salon in like ten years and I'm so dreadfully tenderheaded. But I need to find someone to trim my ends.

Last thing: started reading Tress of the Emerald Sea by Brandon Sanderson and it's very.. quaint, so far, I'd say. The narration is very storybook-y which can be fun to read though wasn't quite what I was expecting (but some lines are just so silly and out of the box that they put a smile on my face, and I love somatic reactions to media so much). I'm about a third of the way through after three days, so going steadily. Getting faster lol.

Actual last thing: Superman TAS is fun and interesting, but the music doesn't feel quite as special as BTAS. Like it's fine, it's heroic in the ways that it should be. I do like the animation a lot though, and maybe that's just the nostalgia haha it can be a lil visibly jerky sometimes :P

[wfagamerants]

As I mentioned from the start, while this blog won’t be entirely Mario/DK/Yoshi/Wario focused, this particular universe will be the main thing I like talking about, so I figured it would be fun to look back on everything Marioverse that has happened this year and give a opinion on it.

Gonna go step by step and then give a final opinion on the year as a whole. Compared to the Paper Mario essay, this isn’t gonna be analytical in nature, just some quick thoughts on everything wahoo.

Mario Kart Tour

This year actually did offer me a surprising amount of things I like. Petey returning as a driver, the Dr. Mario stuff and Wario’s Shipyard are all stuff I would love to see in a regular Mario Kart. That is also a key word though.

I don’t play Tour and this year hasn’t convinced me to do so either. Compared to what other mobile games like Fire Emblem Heroes, Sonic Forces Speed Battle or Puyo Puyo Quest do, I simply don’t find Tour’s content impressive. Games like these tend to offer a huge amount of content from their franchises’ history to entice you and to me, are a compensation for putting up with mobile game annoyances.

Tour offers more than average for a Mario spin-off, but that’s not enough for me to give into checking out a mobile game and while I do like a lot of alts, it’s flooded so much with alts of the same characters again and again, that I wouldn’t have fun going for that. I like Mario, but one of his dozens of alts could have gone to DK or Wario or Waluigi and I would be a bit more intrigued. Variety is the spice of life and GACHA temptations (I know the GACHA is gone).

Also, quite a number of Daisy alts this year, but no Classic Daisy. I am not pleased.

Wario Cup

Get It Together’s Wario Cup ran for most of the year, concluding around the time of the game’s first anniversary.

The concept of an online competitive leaderboard mode is genuinely brilliant and something I hope comes back in future games. There were plenty of pretty chill Cups that were fun to go for the highest rank for and it had a lot of cool ideas for unique challenges. While it didn’t compensate for a proper online multiplayer, Wario Cup at it’s best was a great addition.

That said, there were also a number of bad Cups and I can’t lie, those were nasty. Putting the most limited characters into the worst kind of situations for them, with little room for error, just doesn’t make for a fun experience and instead turned into an exercise in frustration.

The first 9-Volt, Kat and Ana Cup was so bad it even made me reconsider my opinion on the character gimmick. That did go away when I replayed the regular stages and never had the same issues, but it does bring forth the worst case scenarios of how character balancing is handled in this game.

On the whole I still went out of Wario Cup more positive than not and GiT remains my new favorite WarioWare, but the mode does really show off things that future games need to address.

Wario’s 30th Anniversary

Nintendo didn’t acknowledge it.

Didn’t expect anything else, would have just been cool to be proven wrong.

Mario Kart Booster Course Pass

To put that one simply: I feel like I got precisely what I paid for.

The tracks do feel cheap, but the price and quantity make me perfectly comfortable to consider these tracks a bonus, ala’ the Super Mario Kart tracks in Super Circuit. Getting to experience some of these Tour exclusive tracks and remakes is something I genuinely get a kick out of, even if they could be presented in a nicer way and used the anti-gravity more.

While Wave 2 and 3 have the better selection on the whole and the Custom Item option is a surprisingly big addition to suddenly drop, Wave 1 still has my personal biggest highlight in Ninja Hideaway. This is one Tour track I always wanted to try and I am amazed by how good it is, like you could tell me it was made for a normal Mario Kart from the start and I’d believe it.

In the end though, this is still Mario Kart 8. Still a phenomenal game and I am enjoying the new stuff, but I have also been playing this game since it released on the Wii U, so my revisits aren’t that long-lived. 

Mario Strikers Battle League

I feel comfortable talking about this game now, but if the next update changes my opinions in any way, I’ll do a quick follow-up.

BL is a bit of an unfortunate case, I really can’t say I don’t like the game, because so much about it does land for me.

- The core gameplay is fun, even more so in multiplayer. I do miss some of the insanity of Charged, but at the same time, that never felt entirely intentional to me.

- The animation work is still fantastic and full of character. Sucks that there is only three post-goal animations per character and two of them you will see a ton, but it does make up for that with the huge amount of animation work elsewhere, especially in-field.

- The music’s good. It still has a visual identity. I like the Gear system (not so much grinding for coins). The updates are making the roster slowly come together. The online is….as functional as Nintendo Online can be for now, that all checks out.

That stuff is all good, but it is held back by an aspect I was really worried about, the update practice.

I’m not kidding when I say the game at launch felt incomplete and even now it still doesn’t feel like it’s all there. Strikers was never the most content dense series, in fact, BL still beats out the first game in content quantity, but even then you get this constant sense something is missing.

In particular, I dearly hope a stage hazard toggle will get added next update. Stadium gimmicks really helped Charged’s staying power, by changing how to play in each of them. Be it a muddy field that makes you slide like crazy or Thwomps that threaten to crush the players.

BL just has nothing like that and it also leads to the gimmick of combining two stadium halves feeling undercooked and unfinished. It could lead to a lot of crazy combinations, if each half had its own hazards, but as it is now, it’s only purpose is to show off how you made your half look in the Strikers Club.

BL is still getting at least one more update, possibly more, given the timeline only listed them as updates for 2022 specifically and I hope those add something substantial. The game needs it.

(Hey, the new update was announced an hour after I posted this!....they didn’t do anything big and it’s the last one. Sucks.)

Mario + Rabbids Sparks of Hope

This one was oddly the one where I had to collect my thoughts the most, despite my opinion being the most straight forward.

On the whole, I have a hard time telling which of the two games I prefer. Sparks of Hope to me manages to carry on every strength of the original save for one little thing and it makes for a great experience.

Between the cartoony, charming presentation, the music and general personality of the game, everything has been left intact how I liked it in the first game. I was also happy to see what kind of gameplay possibilities the free movement, instead of using tiles, enables. I was skeptical, but was won over as early as the tutorial.

The game in those areas really does nothing  but expand. Far more freedom with what team to build. The overworld gameplay has been greatly expanded upon. More interacting with NPCs. More mechanics. Actual involvement of Mario mooks in battles. All this stuff is wonderful and I was surprised by how much this game genuinely scratched my itch for new Mario RPG content.

The one thing about the game I am bit lukewarm on is, possibly ironically, the Mario content.

There is stuff there for sure, I mentioned Mario mooks now taking art in battles. Yah also got Sparks and a Spoiler character we all saw coming. Bowser being playable now is of course also a delight, then again I have no issue with how anyone in the game is portrayed.

Thing is, at many points, it feels like the Mario stuff takes a backseat, especially compared to the first game.

- The Toad and Toadette escort missions are gone, with both only making minor appearances now.

- All the Spark Hunters are Rabbids and all the important NPCs you meet are Rabbids.

- You don’t get stuff like Rabbid Kong, Bwario or Bwaluigi here. Yoshi and Jr are also MIA.

- None of the stuff from the Season Pass is headlined by a Mario character, unlike the first game, which had a Donkey Kong campaign. The new antagonist for the second part of the Pass is also another Rabbid.

- You have 5 playable Rabbids and only 4 playable Mario characters. I was genuinely a bit shocked that SPOILER wasn’t unlockable in any way shape or form.

Don’t get me wrong, everything that’s here is fantastic and I enjoyed myself all the way through. The Rabbids are still the best they have ever been and I really love them now and the Rayman(!) announcement is one of the most hype things for me in quite some time. All this is great, I just feel this crossover is on the uneven side and that feeling gradually snuck up on me.

Time will tell what the Season Pass holds in full. It does promise more characters in plural, so I strongly assume SPOILER is being saved for that.

Mario Movie

After a long time of not knowing what to expect, we finally got a look at the movie and yeah, it’s gooooood.

It’s visually stunning, the characters are great, the DK love is insane and it is so purely, proudly, Mario.

I have more to say on this one, but I am saving it for another write-up I got planned.

On the whole, a solid year even with ‘’only’’ two new games released. The Mario movie and Sparks of Hope do a lot of heavy lifting here, but there was a lot for me to enjoy.

The one main thing I feel was missing was highlight on the multiplayer spin-off front, so to speak. The Mario Kart stuff is nice to have, but not mind blowing and Strikers is a highlight in many areas, that just doesn’t come fully together, because of its content problems.

I am disappointed by the lack of Mario Party DLC. I like Superstars, but it has things about it (eh minigame selection, lack of minigame modes, tiny roster, etc) that DLC would do a lot to fix. Ideally the game was testing ground and they are working on a new game already, that builds on Superstars’ reception. With how the game relies on old content and 52 of the minigames were already in Top 100, it does feel like it was made for that kind of purpose.

That aside, I do feel this was a fine year for Mario, now I’m just curious what’s next. The well of established and recurring series is running dry. Maybe Baseball is next? Maybe something new? How about that rumored Donkey Kong game? Wario Land anyone?

Time will tell.

[thekingofwinterblog]

Roadmap after Amphibia

so since a surprisngly large amount of people have come to follow me for my Amphibia posts, i feel i should give some explanation for how im going to go forward now that the show is ending.

Namely, im obviously cover the finale, and talk about things i notice in it as i usually do, and make character analysis about them, but since there obviously won’t be more content coming, and speculation and predictions will not be a relevant thing anymore next week, there will be a limited amount of stuff i can make about it once the show is done.

Also, despite what it’s become, this is not really an amphibia blog. just a tumblr where i post about stuff i find interesting, character analysis and the like. Honestly im very surprised that so many people actually like my amphibia content. but alas, all good things must come to an end.

that said, i do have some larger posts planned that i’ve been planning to do for a while now, before i mostly stop making huge amphibia posts, so if you like my takes, stay tuned for them in no particular order.

An overview of EVERY single instance of the girls being superhuman, from “Anne or beast” to “the Hardest Thing”. There’s a lot of those.

An analysis and speculation about Sasha’s relationship with her parents, and how they both destroyed her ability to love others in a healthy way for years. Might be influenced by the finale, depending on wheter we get to see Mr and Mrs Waybright before the show ends.

“The Weak Link”, where i go over and break down Sasha and Marcy’s relationship from Sasha’s point of view and speculate on why Sasha came to view Marcy as the distinct second most important person in her life compared to the single most important person in her life; Anne(as opposed to both Sasha and Anne who regards the other two as equally important in their eyes). Probably gonna be the most contentious Take i have on the series.

A big post finale analysis where i compare the show in length(Plot, story structure, and of course characters) to the 3 best western cartoons from after 2000, Avatar the last airbender, Ducktales, and Gravity Falls, and give my take on where i find it overall in terms of quality by comparison.

Also, not a post about Amphibia itself, but i am going to start writing on one of two Amphibia AU’s stories i’ve had floating around.

---

Option 1, is set in a world wher Aldrich has an “unfortunate” accident right before the original trio goes to the box storage room, thus derailing the entire original backstory. The box is still lost, but at a much later point in time, after andrias has conquered and subjugated Earth, along with several other worlds, and since Andrias in this story has little interest in exterminating life on the planets he conquers, the various races of those worlds are incorporated into the empire, and many brought home to amphibia.

the story is set long, long after the empire fell, and the humans stuck on the planet have long since been forced to integrate into this world and have a currently uneasy, but relatively stable relations with their fellow amphibians.

If i go with this story, it will be more of a political tale, as the feudal structure of this society, and how it’s affected each of the girls backgrounds in this story will be front and center, along with the regular wacky amphibia stuff.

Anne, the daughter of a couple of chefs from Newtopia, finding herself stranded in the most remote province the empire has, Sasha, the daughter of a noble family of Dukes, forced to make her own way because she’s the second child, and as such has no inheritence to speak of despite her martial skills, and Marcy, a huge nerd for all things occult and magical, who’s actions set into motions the three girls being forced to leave Newtopia.

And as in canon, the three childhood friends eventually come into contact with a certain box, which will affect both their world, and Earth down the line....

gonna be incorporating a lot of the beta designs for the girls if i go with this one.

---

Option 2, basically just the regular girls being swapped around, though the story actually diverged a bit before the girls were sent to amphibia.

Sasha is the MC, who is sent to the Plantars, Where she quickly begins making friends, but also sees her relationships blow up spectacularily as they tend to do, and her having to grow from that.

Marcy is sent to Toad Tower, where after a rough start begins to flat out isekai this setting, using her massive intellect, her knowledge of chemistry to make gunpowder, introducing a lot of more modern stuff to Grime’s army, be it tech, tactics, or just way of thinking. Ultimately ends up being convinced the King is evil for creating the current system, and conspires with Grime to topple the tyrant as any good Isekai protagonist would have.

Anne ends up in Newtopia and that is all i have to say about it.

Basically a retelling of the series, just with some major changes that completely changes a lot of dynamics.

[rebelbrat]

One headcanon about the Galra that I have been absolutely SLEEPING on is my headcanon that subspecies (& their ethnicities) that live in places with cold winters actually gain a decent amount of weight and grow out thicker fur when it’s winter in their homelands. They go through a phase that lasts a few months before the onset of winter where they become insatiably hungry, causing them to gain anywhere from 50 to 75 pounds. The Fulsa wouldn’t seem like they’d fit this bill, but the place where they come from is a hellscape that resembles Death Valley--extremely low in elevation, with incredibly hot, 122 degree Fahrenheit summers and torturously cold winters with driving snow and temperatures well below freezing. 

Galra already tend to have a mix of muscle and fat in their build, with Tobias’ body looking like this as an example. He doesn’t gain as much weight as a full Galra would (and not nearly as much as his dad who becomes a full on bear), and he also doesn’t gain fur because human. But he’s still a good 30 pounds heavier during the winter months on Daibazaal and oh god is he dysmorphic about it. He hates that his face gets softer, he hates gaining a belly and love handles, he hates that his hands are chubbier and overall that his body has less definition…He already thinks his body doesn’t have enough definition because it’s not completely shredded and has some softness to it (though oh my god you could still turn him into a gorgeous marble statue) and those doubts just get even worse in the winter. Honestly he looks absolutely adorable and would feel incredibly soft and cuddly if he let anybody touch him during that stage but alas, he doesn’t see it.

(Small side note: This applies to my regular Lotor as well! Overall I have this headcanon that Galra actually have a decent amount of fat to them because Galra were built to be BIG and I am not a coward who thinks the only valid “bigness” is tall and shredded with like only 3% body fat!)

[jaskiersvalley]

Socks ❤️❤️How could I not send this to the absolute sweetest and kindest of friends?? Consider it not only a message but also a long distance hug because you deserve all the hugs! 🤗Send this to the twelve nicest persons you know or seem to have a good heart and if you get five back you must be pretty awesome 💕☺️

Bready! You are so lovely! I swear you make me tear up with happiness on a very regular basis. If I could, I’d be bundling you up in a massive hug right about now. Alas, the world is not in a state for that to be possible just yet. So have a ficlet instead for an idea that woke me at 3am with the thought “this is one I need to tell Bready about”.

Awakening

The world hated Witchers, that much was true. They were freaks, mutants, terrifying with their abilities as they took on monster after monster that no man could contend with. In another reality they could have been worshipped as heroes and gods. Alas, the Continent was taught to fear the Witchers, the very Mages who created them poisoned the world against them. With good reason too, though their secrets died with them. They hadn't set out to create warriors or protectors. They had wanted to create gods that they could control. Nobody knew that they had succeeded.

Geralt was the Wolf mages' prime example. Their previous attempts at the second set of mutations had been hindered by their own doubts. They didn't think their selected victims would survive so they didn't. But Geralt, he was something special. All the mages pulled together, their collective faith that he was the one meant that Geralt came out of the second bout of torture as something more than an average Witcher. The mages' belief fuelled his abilities and, as other Witchers saw him and his new prowess, Geralt's status as something more than them was cemented. It effected his everything from signs to prowess with his sword. Geralt became the hated hero of Witchers, the one who survived twice the number of mutations an thrived.

When the sacking happened, the surviving Wolf Witchers crumbled. Geralt less so than the others because he was still known throughout the Continent, had people believe in his capabilities. But Eskel's signs became weaker. They blamed it on grief, on the shock and trauma of clearing up the aftermath of the sacking. Even though Witchers allegedly didn't feel, the others knew how much bullshit it was. They just hoped that, given time, Eskel would bounce back.

Seemingly, the least affected was Lambert. But, then again, nobody ever really thought he would amount to much. A runt, a troublemaker, one who would never amount to much. So he didn't. His signs were weak, he wasn't a natural with a sword. What he was though, was determined. He proved every doubter wrong, learned his swordsmanship by rote, practiced until he could survive. Just because Eskel saw him and decided he was worth the effort, was worth spending hours upon hours with, going through the bestiaries, footwork, forms, it didn't mean it was enough to improve his signs. One Witcher's belief wasn't enough to lift anyone out of the dirt. But Lambert believed in himself enough to get by, his spite and determination to prove everyone wrong was just about enough to have him cling to the coattails of skills that meant he could survive life as a Witcher.

Blaviken happened, Geralt's cocksureness in his capabilities wobbled. He was on the cusp of crumbling, the world was turning against him and he didn't know how to keep going. At least, not until Jaskier came along. The bard's songs spread through the Continent, the White Wolf had a reputation the far outstripped all previous notions and beliefs. Once again Geralt was in his prime, strong, powerful and determined. He took on monster after monster and came out victorious.

He wasn't the only one to benefit. Though Eskel had always had powerful signs, the fact the Continent was slowly becoming less hostile towards Witchers helped him too. After the Trials, everyone had admired the strength of his signs and his robustness. After the sacking, when he went out into the world again, Eskel found a new reputation, one that pushed him not just in the ways of a Witcher's capabilities. Bedding one succubus led to another. Soon, Eskel had amassed a new set of believers in the form of creatures who admired not only his compassion and strength as a Witcher but also his skills in bed.

There was some improvement for Lambert too, thank to Jaskier's work. But he found something more. Aiden was the first person he met who truly believed Lambert was capable. It spurred Lambert to show off for him, to want to try and be better, worthy of the attention. And Aiden gave it to him, loving to see Lambert succeed. While Eskel's quiet belief in Lambert had been enough to keep him going, Aiden's adoration was the spark that Lambert had missed. He thrived under the attention, the love. Though his signs still could never compare to that of his brothers', he didn't care.

Without the mages to temper their beliefs and that of the Continent, Witchers flourished. Jaskier's songs fuelled their reputation which only served to make them more powerful. Not that they realised, not initially. It was good fortune, the change of attitudes made them see things differently. It was only when Vesemir dared venture out on the Path again, feeling less old and run down than he had in decades.

Monsters no longer stood a chance when they encountered a Witcher. A mate pair of arch griffins was a bit of a workout but no longer the fear fuelled fight of desperation between a creature and a Witcher who just wanted some coin to afford food and repairs. Things were changing and there was more to it than simple good fortune. It was time to do something that Witchers hadn't done in a long time. They all got together.

Sorceresses had Aretuza, mages had Ban Ard. Suddenly, Witchers were in search of a home, they had been too spread out, schools at war with each other thanks to the long dead mages. Now, they were uniting, finding their own worth and slowly pushing the boundaries of their newfound limits. It was the very beginning of something new, something the Continent had never seen before. The new gods were awakening.

[gojoscloset]

“Hello, I just read your writing d**k appointment and I like it very much. And suddenly, I saw that you open the request NSFW dialogue prompts. Would you please write prompt 60 “Looks like someone wants to be a dad/mom” with Gojo or Megumi please 🥺”

Bahaha omg I’m so sorry I’m late as hell I’ve been busy with a lot mentally cause I have the attention span of a goldfish.

Please please enjoy, thank you so much for requesting lol. I’m back on my bullshit ✨

60. “Looks like someone wants to be a mom/dad”

WARNINGS: N S F W

Reposted from previous account

Smut obvs.

Breeding kink???? (if you squint)

Cream pie

Mentions of Pregnancy

No proofread??

————-

“Looks like someone wants to be a mom.”

You didn’t dare look away from what you thought had to be one of the cutest pairs of baby shoes you have ever laid your eyes on.

“Hmm? What do you mean? I just thought they were cute!” you lifted the pair of shoes up and gave your boyfriend a grin.

But Satoru was no idiot.

You see, these past few months have been filled with nothing but waves of emotions and ideas that you would have never thought you would have contemplated this early in life, but a pregnancy scare earlier in the year shook your world and turned it on its axis.

Of course you had imagined a life with Satoru, possibly married in the later years, and a potential family way wayyy down the line. However, you were content with where you two stood. A strong and healthy relationship, 2 consenting adults in love. But you also had to remember you were 2 powerful sorcerers in love. So even with your line of work, kids at the moment seemed really out of the question. Hell, even being in a relationship with someone like Satoru was a blessing with the lives you two lived. So even the idea of bearing his child seemed like you were asking for a lot from the universe.

When your period came late, all your little fantasies and thoughts of having a family took a step closer to becoming reality, you melted at the idea of becoming a mother and all your fears and doubts were thrown out the window.

But alas, the joy left just as fast as it came you were back on your regular schedule the day before your doctor's appointment. Relieved of course, but things weren’t the same.

Day after day you caught yourself indulging more and more in the idea of what your life would be like with a child. Would your first child be a girl or a boy? Whose features would they take on the most? Oh how you prayed to the gods that they would look more like Satoru than anything.

Would you be a good mother? Would Satoru be a good father? There was no doubt in your mind that he would be.

Don’t even get started on the names.

Your gaze would linger when you would pass up children and their parents at a park. Or when you would pass up baby clothes at the shopping strip, you would stop in your tracks and imagine your future child wearing that outfit.

Secretly you would shop for clothes online just to ‘see what they look like’ Or secretly read first time mom forums on breddit just to ‘See how it feels’ but it was so much more than just a passing curiosity.

And of course, You weren’t the only one who noticed the change.

You and Satoru have been in the love game for a respectable amount of time, and have spent the seconds, hours,days,weeks,months,years, in each other's presence. He would absolutely be able to acknowledge when you’d turn your head in the kids section or when your gaze would linger on the little girls in princess dresses at the market, corners of your lips curling just a little.

Or when a toddler at the grocery store handed him a fake phone,in which he pretended to answer with such enthusiasm you would almost believe he was actually on the phone with someone,he could visibly see how your heart melted at the sight. You looked at him like you wanted to marry him on the spot for the rest of the day. A personal favorite memory of his.

Satoru was a dumbass, but he was not stupid.

You didn’t know how much he loved seeing these little things, the little changes in you. Behind his tinted shades and through his long lashes, he would carefully watch your duality go from powerful sorcerer to something maternal.Something you never did in all the time he has known you until after the scare.

It made him want to jump your bones on the spot and put a baby in you every time, but you never brought up the topic despite seeming to be interested in motherhood, and respectfully he left it alone. But you had been caught red handed almost always.

Satoru held himself back when he had various opportunities to talk about it, do you know how hard that is to do as Satoru?

He wanted to press on. He wanted to pry and ask you all kinds of questions regarding the sudden change, but he knew that there was a time and place for everything, and now was definitely not the time nor location.

“Hey, not bad!” He allowed his glasses to slip off the bridge if his nose ever so slightly to get a better view.

“I would wear these if they came in my size”

He joked, you smacked his arm playfully and laughed.

“Cmon lets g-“

You were about to place the shoes back on the rack but he stopped you before you did. He pulled out his phone and snapped a few photos of the shoes and tag.

“I was being serious” he stated plainly, earning another laugh from the both of you.

——

The rest of the day went on as normal, for the most part. The little interaction at the store replayed not only in your mind but Satoru’s as well.

‘Did I make it too obvious?’

‘Did I overdo it with the shoes?’

‘Is it time to talk about it?’

—-

‘Toru..’ you whined but that didn’t stop him from continuing to bend you like a pretzel while plowing into you.

“Don’t be shy now, you look so good like this. ...And those faces you make....” he licked his lips reaching out to grab your jaw, thumb running across your lip.

Even though you were whining about the embarrassing positions he kept putting you in, your body was on fire and didn’t want this to end.

With every position he managed to go deeper and deeper, hitting places only he knew how to hit. He utilized the curve of his dick just how you liked it, grazing your favorite spots with every thrust.

The way your walls fluttered and clenched against his made them his favorite spots too.

It was crazy to you how Satoru knew your body like nobody else did. He knew every curve, every dip, every corner. He knew what made you weak in the knees and what you disliked with a passion. He knew what made you cream, what made you wet, what made your back arch and your toes curl.

“You like that Hmm?” He bucked his hips, folding your legs up, pushing your knees as close to your chest as possible.

He gazed into your eyes, watching the way your face wrenched in pleasure. He needed that, he loved that. Being able to see your expression contour and twist because of him, god it got him off.

He looked down at you, his usually spiky hair now flattened with sweat, strands sticking to the side of his face. He bit his lip, and gripped your hips with force, bruises were guaranteed.

He brought you closer, you slowed your breathing to control the ride. You two had been fucking long enough to know the Cues, the way your body twitched and the little sounds you would make when you were close triggered the muscle memory and he moved in the way he knew would push you over the edge.

“D..Don't slow down!” You commanded, throwing your head back into the sheets, the familiar tingling sensation starting at your core, his pace picking up, hands trailing down your abdomen, fingers circling around your clit, wet with its own slick.

He couldn’t help but suck on his own bottom lip watching your body rock in rhythm with his, the way your breast bounced, he couldn’t help but grab a handful.

“That’s right baby….” he spoke softly, voice just above the lewd sounds you two we’re making. The squelching, skin slapping skin, the gasping sounds when he would thrust back into you.

He was getting carried away, letting the words just spill from his lips. “Mmmm fuck yeah baby, you feel so fucking good.” He groaned “fuck around and put a baby in you-“

You had been with this man for many many moons, had been through thick and thin, but nothing had prepared you two for that awkward moment.

All movements ceased the second he stopped talking. Both of you pulled away and just looked at each other, embarrassment demonstrated on both of your faces.

Both of you seemed to think about the Barget incident, and then every other incident which made the dirty talk hit different.

“Sorry” Quickly he spoke, in hopes of somehow saving his ass in case things went south.

“W-what for?” You continued to try and mask your feelings about the situation(s), but nothing could get past his eyes.

He was no idiot, you knew that, but you still tried him, because sometimes he lets your shit slide. But not this time.

“Please y/n, I’ve seen the change in you.”

The air was thick, momentarily, but the smile on his face gave you clarity.

“The lingering looks, the shoes at the store… I’ve noticed” his large hands cupped your face, thumb brushing calming shapes against your cheek.

“Is there something we need to talk about?”

He released you from your position and sat up straight.

“Toru…do you really wanna talk about this now?????” Sheepish under the circumstances

“Don’t give me that. We’ve been together too long for you to try and play this game with me.”

His hands found their way to you once again. Pulling you by the wrists, he sat you up and made you look at him as he continued to speak.

“Communication remember?” He was soft, yet stern.

“You haven’t been the same since the missed period incident.” Your jaw dropped, he was on it even with the timing.

There was no sense in hiding anything anymore, this man knows all, this man sees all.

“I’d be lying if I said you were wrong….you see..” you began to pour your heart out, trying your hardest to keep eye contact with him.

“The pregnancy scare heightened the want for a family with you, Satoru. I envision a lot of things, and you being in my future for a long long time is one of them...”

He held your gaze while looking at you like you were the most beautiful thing in the world. He listened intently like you were whispering the secrets of the universe to him.

“But I never brought up the topic of family because we’re-“

“Sorcerers” He finished the sentence for you, the small smile he held earlier now turned into a flat line.

The speed in which he did was almost enough to make you flinch. Bittersweet in a way,at least this confirmed that he too thought about a family with you at one point but considered the circumstances.

A“Exactly..” you continued. “And the scare made me realize what I want in life..with you. But it’s out of reach and it’s not something I wanted to project onto- “

His large hands placed themselves in either side of your face and Satoru showered you with kisses.

“I. Love. You. So. Much.” He spoke in between kisses.

“I love you too, but- AH!!! What are you doing??!”

Satoru pulled you by your ankles, placing himself in between your legs once again.

“Putting a baby in you, that's what.” He gave you such a sweet and loving look, it didn’t match the words that spewed from his lips.

“T-that’s not funny…” Quickly, you covered your entrance before he even thought about it.

“Exactly, because it wasn’t a joke sweetheart.”

“Wait, but what about-”

“We’ll be fine, i’m the strongest, remember?” he gave you a playful wink and grabbed your wrists, playfully prying your hands away, he wasn’t going to do anything though, not without your consent, but seeing how flustered he could make you fed the already enlarged ego he owned.

“Now tell me, do you want a boy or girl? Ooh, what about their names?”

“ Satoru… wait… are you sure? Don’t you wanna think about it a little more?”

He let out a playful laugh and pointed a finger dramatically at you, “Are you sure?”

Without missing a beat you nodded, you wanted this so bad, and by the looks of it, so did he.

“That’s all you had to say, let me take care of you, my pillow princess”

-------------

The sultry night was young.How many times have you came already? It didn’t matter.

His arms were wrapped around your entire body, holding you in place as he bounced you up and down his shaft.

“My pretty girl… my sweet sweet princess.” He whispered against your skin, tongue grazing from your collar bone up to your jaw, tasting your sweat. He wanted to breathe you in, and make you his air. The words replayed in his mind as he fucked you senseless.

“and you being in my future for a long long time is one of them...”

“Toru…” Your breathing hitched,, his praise made your walls twitch around him. He got the hint and immediately went to work. In a swift movement you were beneath his form. His skin glistening with a layer of sweat.

“ How do you want it?” he groaned, draping your leg over his shoulder while grabbing the other one, spreading you wider. You were grateful for the change of position, you have been wanting to touch him for a while now but the grip he had you in earlier was not letting it happen.

Your hands hungrily made his way to his chest and arms.

“As long...as I get it…” you managed to mutter through moans. His thrusts became erratic, a sign that he was coming undone as well.

“Look at me..tell me how you want it....tell me how you need it” he licked his lips with desire. You managed to look at him through half lidded eyes, giving him exactly what he wanted, he always did the same for you.

You lifted your hips up some, grinding harder against him, letting more of him fill you up, you could swear you felt his head kiss your cervix. You did a kegel, walls giving his dick a hug.

The actions earned you a breathy moan, he almost lost his cool, it threw off his pace momentarily but when he picked back up, the speed was doubled.

“You like to play dirty, hmm? “

“The only way I like to play…”

“Very well then” he said through grit teeth, finger moving to where you were connected, rubbing your clit in circles without mercy. You were pushed over the edge quickly, mouth Ajar, and body convulsing against him, his movements did not falter.

“That’s my good girl”

He lowered his body down mouth to cage you between his arms, droplets of sweat falling onto the sheets as he tried to avoid sweat falling into your eyes.

“Are you sure?”

He asked once again, not moving an inch until you gave him the go.

You simply stared up at him, goofy grin he always carried on him plastered onto his handsome face.

You gave him the go once again and he bucked his hips.

This particular moment was sweet sweet bliss. Normally Satoru would be careless with his movements when it came to chasing his orgasm, but not this particular one. His touches would linger, fingertips burning themselves into your skin with passion, making their way from your hips to your hands, large fingers filling in the gaps between your own.

His kisses were oh so immaculate. Sweet and soft, but most importantly, abundant.

And the way he spoke your name. Only Satoru could make his words come out like they were coated in honey.

His hips snapped and he gave your hand a squeeze, face in the crook of your neck, the hot breath against your skin forced chills down your spine, with you

“I love you so much…” he groaned into your ear. With a few more bucks of his hips you felt his seed spill into you. You were running on fumes at this point, overkill with the overstim, but that’s how you liked it.

You felt your clit throb, your walls still fluttering against him from your previous climax like they were sucking every last drop of out of him.

He looked down at you silently, but the look on his face, the calm waters in his eyes said everything he needed to say. You couldn’t tear away your gaze, you were already high off the blue dream.

His eyes moved from yours to your lips, they looked needy to him. He bent his head down and planted a kiss, despite the scenario, it was chaste. Innocent. Refreshing.

“I love you.” He repeated, though he had no doubt you felt the same. “I know you do...there is not a single doubt in my mind...and I love you oh so very much, more than I could ever put in words.”

There was another comfortable silence, however, the small smile that was on your face quickly turned into a flustered look when he pulled out of you and spread your legs open, looking at the mess he made inside of you.

“W-what the fuck are you doing?!!”

You laughed nervously and tried closing your legs, but he held them open, too strong for you to try and fight against it.

“I just wanted to see the masterpiece I made. Plus-“ he positioned himself between your legs again

“I’m not done, I want to make sure I get the job done right.”

He gave you a wink, and immediately you knew you were in for a long night.

A very very long night.

[bamfdaddio]

X-Men Unabridged: Proteus

The X-Men, those beautiful mutants that have sworn to protect a world that hates and fears them, are a cultural juggernaut with a long, tangled history. We’ve been untangling that history for a while, but sometimes, you really want a more in-depth look. Interested? Then read the (un)Abridged X-Men!

(X-Men 125 - 128) - by Chris Claremont and John Byrne

Fun* fact: this particular issue is the oldest comic I physically own.

* for a given value of fun

Something sinister lurks on Muir Isle…

This arc is very much set up like a horror movie. It starts out as a regular X-Men narrative, where Claremont is weaving along several plot threads. We check in with the X-Men in Westchester, we check in with Magneto who has retreated to Asteroid M and we even check in with Xavier in space, who finally learns more about the true scope of the Phoenix and its nature. Finally, we’ve got Jean stationed at Muir Isle, where Moira is investigating the sheer scope of her powers. (She has realized how strong Jean truly is; akin to a god. Her theory is that Jean’s recent power dampening is the result of her human mind trying to cope with her massive power level.) It’s about as everyday as it gets for the X-Men, but, well…

I always thought Jean molecularly restructured her own outfit into the Phoenix-costume whenever she needed to change, but here, she just… wills it away? Also, why did you need an outfit change for this, anyway? Does the costume simply appear whenever she exerts too much of her powers, like an angry forehead vein? So many questions. (X-Men 126)

Other residents at Muir are Polaris, Havok and the Multiple Man, all of them blissfully unaware that something skulks about in the shadows: the remains of an unfortunate captain, whose body has been taken over by something… other.

But someone else is skulking around in the shadows, too. Jean isn’t aware of it, but a familiar stranger is manipulating her from the sidelines.

I’ve been gaslighting a cosmic force, ask me how! (X-Men 126)

1979 marks the first appearance of the Hellfire Club, though we only meet one member for now: Jason Wyngarde. (Maybe all of this could have been avoided if he’d had a Barbie doll to dress up in black lace as a child, but alas.) ‘Jason’ is a pseudonym and though most people these days know that he’s a familiar villain from the X-Men’s past, the reveal of his true identity will follow later.

Meanwhile, Beast finally gets off his ass to check on the Xavier mansion, even though the X-Men must have been tripping intruder alarms for months now. Still, we do get this sweet moment out of it:

Of course she’s going to be surprised at the sheer amount of plot contrivances that were thrown up to keep all y’all apart for a full year. (X-Men 126)

Beast knows that Jean went to Muir, so Scott immediately goes for the phone. Lorna picks up, but during the call she starts screaming, leaning heavily into the horror genre. She fends off the withering remains of the captain, so instead, ‘Mutant X’ jumps into a duplicate of Jamie Madrox and promptly flees to the mainland on a boat.

Guuurl, that body is snatched. (X-Men 126)

The X-Men (sans Beast) hit Muir Isle, where Moira debriefs them. Moira reveals who Mutant X is: his name is Kevin MacTaggart, her son, who has the terrifying power to warp reality. Because his power is so vast, he burns through bodies at an alarming rate. He can only be contained - or killed - by inorganic metal. In an effort to contain him (and, presumably, help him at some point), Moira locked him in a metal cell. He was kept there, alone, for god knows how long, until Magneto accidentally freed him. They know he escaped the island and, because of his parasitic need for fresh host bodies, Moira posits that he’ll be heading for a big city.

Kevin - who dubs himself Proteus - racks up an impressive body count in the country side, killing 7 people in total. (6 people and 1 dupe? Eh.) He’s a terrific villain, because he’s powerful, has a well-defined weakness and, even though it’s not impossible to emphasize with him -- isolation tends to drive people mad -- the way he discards his victims is truly chilling.

The X-Men chase after him, Wolverine picking up the scent. When Proteus tries to claim him, Logan’s adamantium skeleton repels him. In response, he unspools reality.

I’ve had this trip. I think they call this strain Dragon’s Dynamite. (X-Men 126)

Storm intervenes, but Proteus leaves Nightcrawler and especially Wolverine rattled. Logan’s heightened senses root him in reality more than most, and when Proteus uses his powers, everything is just screaming wrong at him. But nobody is safe: little Kevin MacTaggart turns gravity against Ororo, taking her out as well.

He tries to claim Storm, but Moira repels him, sniping at him from afar. Proteus fears (metal) bullets, knowing they can kill him. When Cyclops realizes Moira’s shooting to kill, he intervenes - X-Men don’t kill, after all. Moira knocks him out with her gun, but Kevin escapes in the confusion. Moira finally realizes where her son is headed, while the X-Men regroup.

In Edinburgh, Moira pays Joe MacTaggart a visit - her husband, Kevin’s father.

The MacTaggarts are definitely in the running for the Xavier/Marko-award for Fucked Up Family Dynamics. (X-Men 127)

There’s a calculating coldness to Moira’s character that I’ve never responded well to, but I like how Claremont fills in the blanks here. It’s part unhappiness, part a deep frustration with her inability to help her own son. I wonder how Kevin was a child, before his mutant gene activated: was he a sweet boy, or one with a cruel streak? Did she fear what he might become?

There’s a few gaps in Claremont’s narrative, but Hickman has drawn on this very well, I think: the Moira X in HoXPoX is equally calculating, equally cold. But how can she not be? How often has she raised Kevin? How often has she had to kill him? How many times has she watched these people, these X-Men, die?

Anyway, Moira’s warning is as effective as anger management therapy for Sabretooth, because Kevin comes by Joe’s office a little while later and snuffs out his dad. Phoenix hears Joe screaming telepathically across the moors, allowing the X-Men to pinpoint him. Claremont also makes sure to show that Jean’s power is steadily growing:

Polaris be like: “No, no, I’m carrying my own emotionally stunted Summers boy, thank you.” (X-Men 127)

Proteus takes Moira hostage as the X-Men confront him. They fight.

Ordinarily, I don’t pay a lot of attention to the fight scenes, because recapping those usually boils down to “Cyclops conks Magneto in the helmet” or “Wolverine snikts Pyro in the gas tank”, but this one is truly great. John Byrne delivers some excellent work, showcasing the scope of Proteus’ powers through his art, his panelling. Don’t just take my word for it:

I love how trippy all of this is. Pivoting gravity, changing an optic beam into flowers… Sure, Proteus might be a callous and cruel SoB, but he’s also one imaginative motherfucker. (X-Men 127)

One by one, Proteus manages to distract or take out the X-Men, either by endangering passers-by, encasing them in amber (Storm) or burying them alive (Banshee). One of my favorite details is how afraid they all are: especially Wolverine and Nightcrawler hesitate before jumping into the fray. For them, this villain is truly beyond their scope.

In the end, it’s Phoenix who manages to drive him back, outside of the center of Edinburg and up an old castle, where there are fewer civilians to threaten. There, on the ramparts, it’s Colossus who makes the final stand: he destroys Proteus’ physical body and realizes that right now, there’s only one thing they can do to stop him. All it will cost is Piotr’s innocence.

Showcasing an ancient Japanese truth: Psychic Pokémon are weak to Steel attacks. (X-Men 128)

Proteus scatters to the winds and the X-Men emerge victorious, though Moira has lost both her son and her husband after this ordeal. Moreover, I think this is the first villain that the X-Men explicitly kill, simply because they have no other options left. This marks the first time that their ideal of mutant rehabilitation fails. What’s worse is that Kevin MacTaggart was essentially nothing more than a supremely screwed up boy who got access to way too much power way too quickly.

I wonder if it would have turned out differently had Xavier been there. (I also wonder if it’s a coincidence that this takes place right before the Dark Phoenix saga.)

I think this might be Claremont’s best arc yet, heightened by John Byrne’s excellent art. Chris deftly mixes horror, action and his usual soap opera elements, serving one cohesive narrative that (for once) doesn’t leave much hanging. Proteus is an excellent villain whose powers work visually (pay attention, MCU) and whose entire being touches on one of the same aspects as Krakoa: can and should every mutant fit into any sort of normal society?

If you have someone who’s interested in vintage X-Men and you want to recommend something that doesn’t require a confusing explanation of all the necessary backstory (and perhaps a crude sketch of the Summers and/or Lensherr family tree), I would recommend this arc.

And the rest, as they say, is Hellfire. 1980 is gonna be a doozy.

[sillylittlelouie]

Children Develop Trust

Awareness was slow in coming, after the late night that he'd had last night. It came in parts, ebbing and rising like the tide. The first thing that Frankenstein noticed in one of his more lucid moments, was that there was a weight on his chest. A warm, sweaty and panting weight, that shivered slightly, even as it peacefully snored. Swallowing his disgusted sigh, he looked down at the child whose upper body laid across his chest.

M-21 whined softly in his sleep as he wiped his runny nose in the scientist's sleeping shirt. He shifted, dragging more of his body onto Frankenstein's chest.

He must have agitated his ribs, as he let out a keening wail before he'd done much moving.

Frankenstein waited with bated breath, to see what his little one's reaction would be.

When the boy's fever had first set in, he'd been inconsolable. The slightest brush against his chest, or movement of his ribs while he slept would have woken him with a bout of coughing that would culminate in a bawling fit. Now, the young werewolf merely whimpered, shifting once more before settling into deep slumber once more.

Whether M-21's decreased discomfort came from the healing of his injuries or adaptation to the pain, Frankenstein wouldn't be able to tell. Not without getting the child up for a series of tests.

He pursed his lips. M-21 wasn't a bundle of overactive pain receptors anymore. Nor was he losing any more much-needed sleep.

That thought brought a smile to Frankenstein's face as he craned his neck to press a soft kiss to the boy's sweaty forehead. It was a small blessing that he would not take for granted.

Still, he would have loved to rend Shark to pieces for putting his youngest through this suffering. But alas, the dead could not be brought back to life, no matter what Mary Shelley had speculated.

Still, a man could dream.

Unless he had an important meeting that required his physical presence.

Frankenstein opened his eyes, not knowing when he had closed them.

Right, he had that board meeting today.

With a heavy heart, Frankenstein sat up carefully, one hand under M-21's bum and the other on the back of his neck, attempting to rouse his little one with the action. When that failed he gently, but incessantly patted the boy on his bum.

It was slow going, but eventually, M-21 grumbled as he cracked open an eye. The patting continued, and the other eye opened. A pathetic whine came from him.

It was all that Frankenstein could do, to stand his ground and insist that the child woke up. He had to force himself to keep tapping M-21's bottom, until the boy stopped his whining.

"Good morning," the scientist whispered, smiling when the boy sleepily grumbled at him once more.

"Mm'ning Ff'anken," he murmured rubbing at his eyes with tiny fists. There had been casts on those arms, up to three days ago.

"Will you walk, or would you like to be carried?" Truthfully, there was nothing wrong with his ward's legs. But, after being brutalized by an overgrown bully, Frankenstein felt that the werewolf was entitled to a bit of spoiling-

"...c'n walk..."

-which was always going to be declined, apparently.

"That's not what I asked," Frankenstein replied, taking the boy's hand regardless, "but I will accept that answer."

Frankenstein led him out of the room and down into the living room. Setting him down on the couch, he allowed him to capture a few more minutes of sleep as he went ahead and began preparing breakfast. The smells soon roused the other members of his household and, one by one, they all joined the scientist and the young werewolf.

Seira's gentle voice drifted into the kitchen as she led M-21 away for a bath. Her exact words were lost, covered up by the sound of the little one's grumbling, and the rustle of Regis as he prepared their belongings for school. Tao and Takeo were the next to shuffle down. The hacker bounding with all the exuberance of a puppy, while the sniper silently slid into the room. Both immediately migrated towards the coffee pot, casting wary glances at him.

Frankenstein gave them a tired smile as he flipped a pancake, and they relaxed slightly.

"How's M-21?" Tao ventured, pouring a large mug of coffee. A very large mug.

Frankenstein eyed it skeptically. He kept on frowning at it, until Tao finally got the message.

"He's doing much better," he replied, smiling brilliantly once he saw the caffeine being split into two mugs. "His fever's been greatly reduced, and he's been staying awake for longer."

M-21 had also been sleeping for longer periods without nightmares, but Frankenstein was sure that he didn't need to mention it. They'd all noticed the distinct lack of screeching in the middle of the night, he was sure.

"Will you be sending him to school then?" Takeo asked, taking the second mug from Tao. Confusion marred his features when Frankenstein shook his head. "Why not? If he's doing much better, then shouldn't he be able to resume his schooling?"

"While his internal bleeding has stopped, his temperature is still very high, Takeo."

The sniper's gaze sharpened. "Didn't you say that his fever was lowered as well?" he shot back, as if he were daring Frankenstein to renege on his words.

As if he would take the child and flee, if he found that Frankenstein was unreliable. The only thing stopping him, the scientist surmised, was the fact that he would have to take M-21 back to the Union, if he did.

Again, Frankenstein sighed. He began putting their breakfast on plates as he contemplated his words.

Tao and Takeo were much more stable than M-21, and their modifications were more complex. Illness, let alone illness in unmodified humans, was most likely an unfamiliar concept for them.

"His fever is still high enough to be dangerous, for a regular human."

Takeo nodded, his face smoothing out into an unreadable slate. "So you will both remain home for a little longer?"

A tempting thought, but an ill-advised one, considering the amount of paperwork that he just knew was waiting for him. "He's coming to work with me today," Frankenstein sighed, turning his back on them as he motioned for them to take a few plates and follow him into the dining room. His right hand ached at the thought of the veritable mountain of paper. "I have a very important meeting today, and I can't afford to miss it. M-21 however, can be in the office while I conduct my meeting."

He set his cargo down on the table and paused, hands resting on the back of a chair. He'd need both hands and then some, if he wanted to take stock of all the times that his colleagues of years past had ever needed to bring a young child to the factory. Or, in more recent cases, the office. "It might even be expected, in fact."

When he looked at the two DA-5 members, he was a bit surprised to see a calculating glint in Tao's eyes. He'd thought that the hacker had finally been satisfied with the results of his previous tests of Frankenstein's reactions. Apparently he'd been wrong.

"Ya sure that you're not only taking him because you think that everybody else thinks you should?"

For a split second, Tao's easy grin fell away, replaced with something colder. More clinical.

Then it returned, warm enough to  melt the ice in the freezer, and the meat in the deep freeze. His eyes however, remained frozen.

Frankenstein pursed his lips. It seemed that it was finally time to place all of his cards on the table. Because, depending on his next answer, he'd never earn the hacker's complete trust.

Honesty would be the best policy, at this moment.

He smiled at the two men as he stretched a hand out to the hallway, where Seira was just emerging with a freshly showered and, surprisingly, coherent child.

"Well," he started, giving Seira a grateful nod as he gently lifted M-21 into his arms, "I'd be lying if I said that that wouldn't be an added reason to keep him close." He tweaked the child's nose, relishing the fact that the boy was feeling well enough to bat his hand away.

Still smiling, he swept over to join his patiently waiting master at the table.

M-21 was in pain. Raizel was certain that he could feel that pain, despite the fact that he'd  been unable to sense the emotions of the teachers once they were in the administration wing, and he was in his classroom.

In his mind's eye, he could see the youthful face, contorted in pain, as it had been for those first few nights. The wet, hacking coughs drifted into the room, echoing around and drowning each of the human professor's words.

When it became unbearable, Raizel swallowed his recalcitrance and peered into the minds of his unconcerned colleagues, if only to discover how they could ignore the sound.

…the sound was the product of his own subconscious? That would not do.

That was how he found himself standing on the inside of Frankenstein's office, listening to the child's ragged breathing as he slept on the sole sofa in the room.

His friend had run from the room only a few minutes after Raizel had joined him in his office, but not before leaving him with explicit instructions on what should be done if the young one woke before his return.

Raizel had almost been sorely tempted to cut the human off as he gave a staggeringly large list that he had no hope of remembering. Decorum, however, kept his mouth shut.

Barely.

But, a victory was a victory nonetheless, and Frankenstein was allowed to list duties and plans and contingency plans, right up until he was forced to leave or risk missing the meeting entirely.

In a few seconds, his feet had taken him from the center of the room, and over to the sofa. Leaning over, he used a single finger to stroke a plump cheek. A memory of the recently mottled skin rose to the fore of his mind, causing him to frown.

The assassin that Tao and Takeo had called their teammate had caused the boy grievous bodily harm.

Frankenstein, to his credit, had tried to keep the full extent of the damage from them. But, such a level of suffering was impossible to hide. Even if one was as talented as Frankenstein.

As if he sensed Raizel's disquiet, M-21 drew back with a whimper. When the boy squirmed and let out a breathless cry, he realized what was going on.

Placing a hand at M-21's side to prevent him from moving anymore, Raizel winced at the feel of a section of ribs as they flailed about. Every time M-21 inhaled, that particular area dug into his lungs, the pressure only being relieved when he exhaled.

Raizel frowned once more.

Blood had already been collecting in the boy's lungs, because of the stab wound that Shark had delivered. With this...Raizel's mind blanked, and he drew on Frankenstein's knowledge for more assistance.

With the 'flail chest', M-21's ribs were bruising the boy's lungs. Already, there was blood pooling within, and air escaping his lung.

Frankenstein would have to cut the boy open, in order to repair this damage. At M-21's age, there was no way that his body would be able to heal without assistance.

Or...

Frankenstein would worry if he ever found out what he was about to do. But the child was in pain, and Raizel...h-he couldn't let the boy suffer any more than he already had. He wouldn't let the boy suffer.

Not when he was so young, with so much more of his life ahead.

The thought of such a thing was inherently abhorrent, for some reason.

Glancing around to make sure that they were indeed alone, the Noblesse began funneling his power into the child's chest. The infantile bone resisted his efforts at first, adamantly committing to their positions. But, at Raizel's insistence, they began to ease into their proper positions.

Through it all, M-21 wore a grimace. Once it was finished though, he heaved a sigh of relief and burrowed further into his blanket and the couch.

Drained by the effort, Raizel sank into a nearby chair and closed his eyes for a moment.

When he opened them again, there was a faint sense of pressure against his torso.

Glancing down, Raizel froze at the sight of the white blanket draped across his upper body. How had..? He looked up, scanning the seemingly empty room for M-21.

"You're up."

Raizel looked down at his feet. A pair of grey eyes blinked back up at him.

"Where's Franken?" M-21 asked. He might have added on something else, but the rest was lost to his yawn. His eyelids began drooping, and, as if it would stop him from yawning once more, he began to crawl into Raizel's lap. "...'m ribs don't hurt no more."

"They've healed," Raizel informed him.

The boy yawned again, curling up against his chest. "...'s good, right...?"

"Yes, it is."

Another yawn. "Good."

Raizel held himself stiffly as he allowed the wolf pup to make himself comfortable. Once the boy was settled, he allowed his hand to rest atop his head.

Frankenstein had been doing so with increasing frequency, during the past few days. He'd claimed that the motion had proved to be soothing, for M-21.

However, now that he was here, running his hand through the boy's hair, he wondered if his friend had also been finding comfort in the motion.

M-21 shifted beneath his hand, and Raizel looked down, slightly curious as to what he would do next.

The boy however, seemed content to allow the question in his heart to go unsaid, if even for a few moments more.

Raizel's hand resumed its path, combing through the grey locks. He stroked his head in silence, mindful to avoid the burn of M-21's desire, lest he unwittingly intrude upon his thoughts.

His hand fell away when M-21 began moving again. But, before he could glance at the boy, his vision was filled with grey.

Raizel blinked, and the grey retreated, just enough for him to see the full face.

"I..." M-21 began, hesitancy clouding his voice, hanging around him like a dark curtain. "Can...can I-" he swallowed, and fell silent.

His mind, however, was a cacophony of half-formed questions and thoughts. Nothing would stay, flitting into being and dissipating just as quickly as they had come.

"I wanna-"

The rubble.

The pile of rubble that had trapped M-21's comrade loomed, higher and more daunting than Raizel had ever seen it, whenever it graced the little one's thoughts.

He blinked, his hand resuming its path across the top of M-21's head. "I'm sure that he would not mind if you were to go and visit him." He paused, using his fingers to loosen a knot in the child's hair. "I will accompany you."

The pup gave him a weak smile. "Can...can I bring some flowers too? I wanna pick flowers for him, because...because..."

It flashed across his mind's eye, almost too quickly for him to get a proper impression. But Raizel had seen it.

He smiled. "As many as we can."

[enviedear]

the empty feeling → draco malfoy

DESCRIPTION ⌙ in which malfoy is consoled by a girl who can’t help but fall for him.

PAIRING ⌙ draco x fem!reader

WORD COUNT ⌙ 2.1k

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

you thought the reason your heart never fully recovered was because of the fact you had to see him everyday.

every single day you saw him. he was laughing, bickering, looking out a window, eating, reading, and in conversations. you couldn’t help but watch. you tried not to. you tried to make the love you had for him diminish. or maybe at least dull. it wouldn’t work.

you didn’t mean to fall in love with draco malfoy. however you did. your heart overruled your brain. at least when it came to him.

you think back to the day you knew you loved the slytherin boy. it was a foggy and rainy day that truly began at a slug club meeting.

“dreadful weather we’re having right, miss y/l/n?” slughorn asks you.

the rest of the slug club stares at you as you respond, “i quite like the rain. i get the best sleep when it rains.”

he nods and replies,”ah, just like your father. i remember he loved to listen the rain when he was your age. does he still listen? to the the rain, my dear?”

you didn’t want to talk about your father. not that you didn’t love the man, but you knew there wasn’t much you could indulge. he kept his work close to him and never really told you much. you knew slughorn would eventually lead the conversation to your fathers work.

“sometimes professor. he’s usually busy these days though.” you say, looking down at your ice cream.

busy because of people like zabini and crabbe’s parents. as you looked back up at slughorn you didn’t miss the sly look blaise gave you. you quickly turned your attention back to the professor.

“ah! i wouldn’t expect him not to be. amazing work your father does, making such simple objects into wands. you know my dear, i heard he turned a rusty old spoon into a very powerful wand!” slughorn boasts for you.

you smile as a response and allow the teacher to spark conversation with the other club members.

what slughorn forgets to add is that the wands your father has begun to produce are being used by many deatheater families. since the wands cannot be tracked, and are easy to pass off as illegitimate objects. they buy them for their children and it’s not as if your father or the ministry can do much about it.

plus, your father shouldn’t have to loose his job just because others take advantage of him. and even if he did make the damn things trackable that would be putting a target on his back.

as you mull over your thoughts slughorn stands and bids you all a goodnight. you politely tell the man night, and walk out of the room. you were going to head to the hufflepuff common room, but as you passed moaning myrtle’s bathroom you stopped in your tracks.

you heard crying. and the cries weren’t myrtle’s usual wails, but a boy’s. on further inspection you found that they also weren’t just any boys cries but, malfoy’s.

you slowly creeped into the abandoned bathroom, making sure to not alert malfoy that you were there.

he sat by the sinks and looked utterly distressed. his eyes a deep red. he looked completely broken. you’d never seen the boy like this. and it broke your own heart.

against your better judgement you cleared your throat to make yourself known.

he looked up at you, defeated.

you didn’t say anything as you bent down and gave the boy a hug. he didn’t say anything as he hugged you back. he just let his tears escape onto your shirt.

eventually he let you go. you didn’t have the slightest clue what to say. nothing seemed right.

“don’t tell a soul about this.” malfoy grimaced, getting to his feet.

you looked at him shocked, “i wasn’t. i-“ he cut you off with a scowl.

“draco you have to trust me. please i won’t say anything just.. take care of yourself.” you said.

he didn’t reply. he just walked out. leaving you confused.

after that day you couldn’t see draco malfoy as a nuisance. no, after that day you couldn’t help but to romanticize the boy. you didn’t think he bullied because he was hateful. no not at all. you thought he did it because he was lonely, sad, or upset. you found his worst qualities easy forgivable. you knew he was broken. but you also knew it wasn’t an excuse, you just couldn’t help it.

so you continued to watch him daily. eyeing him as much as you could. you began to love the way his face would turn into a sneer at the slighted inconvenience. you loved the way he held his cup. you loved the way he looked over his books. and for some reason you began hoping. hoping that maybe one day he would eye you too.

alas, the boy went and broke your heart by dating pansy. you knew it wasn’t done to be malicious. you knew he didn’t know about your feelings. you knew he was probably very happy with pansy and she with him.

though, you’d still find the boy in the bathroom on a regular basis and have to console him. each time you’d think he’d come around. each time he did not.

you kept hoping though. it proved you detrimental as you went from being a happy and loving person to someone who harbored far too much loathing. you couldn’t help it, you felt so cheated. how could you love and care for this boy and he not even say a word to you?

your friends noticed your behavior.

“y/n you’re taking out whatever is upsetting you on us. and you won’t even tell us what’s wrong.”

then your teachers.

“miss y/l/n your grades are slipping. and you’re not acting like yourself at all. is everything ok?”

then your sibling(s).

“i didn’t do anything to you, stop treating me like this y/n.”

and finally your parent(s).

“honey, are you sure everything is alright at school? you don’t have to go back if something is seriously wrong.”

you were better than before. you were finally home. you didn’t have to see the boy anymore. you didn’t have to be reminded of him every waking moment.

but still, you weren’t you.

you never told any of the people worried about you why exactly you weren’t ok. you hated the thought of being this upset over a boy you genuinely barely knew.

and even though you told yourself repeatedly that you in fact did not know malfoy, your heart proclaimed otherwise.

when you returned to school, this time in your sixth year, you decided that you needed to avoid the problem.

so you did. you ate breakfast and dinner without looking up from your food. you paid far too much attention in class. you never went to hogsmeade. you isolated yourself.

and it worked, more than less. you only caught a glimpse of malfoy a handful of times. each time less painful.

by november you began to forget about your weird fascination with malfoy. but when you received news that he and pansy had broken up your heart fluttered just like it would have a few months ago.

but still, finally you felt more like yourself. you began talking to your friends more. you went on a couple of dates. started helping out first years. everything was falling into place.

you tried to ignore the off feeling of emptiness that still lingered in you.

it’s january when you bump into him, on your way to the astronomy tower to meet your friends.

“sorry.” you say, continuing on your path.

“wait, come here, y/l/n.” he says, causing you to double back.

you turn to face him not even slightly happy that you’re allowing this exchange.

“i- well, i wanted to thank you for never telling anyone about last year. i’m sorry i was so brash to you,” he pauses. “that’s all.” he says.

you look at him stunned. it took him a year to apologize. although you knew he had no idea the amount of internal struggle he has caused you, you feel your blood boil.

“i’m glad you spent an entire year gaining the courage to apologize for your behavior. however, i don’t accept your apology. you’re such a coward, malfoy. i mean, you’re afraid that people would find out i consoled you. as if it’s even a big deal. just leave me alone.” you seethe.

whole-heartedly you couldn’t help your outburst. the boy just aggravated you. how could he apologize now?

“i’m sorry i didn’t apologize sooner, but if i were you i’d take the apology i was given.” he glares at you.

“or what malfoy? what could you possibly do?” you ask.

“i never said i’d do anything! i just suggested you take the apology. i’m sorry i didn’t tell you sooner, okay? you just looked so put off all the bloody time. i didn’t want to bother you.” he groans.

now your ears were hot and eyes stone cold.

“put off?” you spluttered, “it’s your fucking fault i looked so put off. you worried me to no end. i never knew if you were ok! and although i know it’s not my business it still hurt. i was so upset for you. and then you wouldn’t say a word to me. and then you dated parkinson. and-“ you stop yourself.

“you just apologized too late, alright.”

he looks at you bewildered, “i’m sorry i feel like i’m missing something.”

you roll your eyes, “i loved you draco. i don’t know why but i did. i wanted to make sure you were ok. everytime you needed me i was there. i never even asked for anything in return, not even human decency. but i shouldn’t have had to ask for that. you should have been nice to me. i was beyond nice to you.”

he furrows his brows,“i am truly sorry, y/n. i didn’t know. i was being selfish and i can admit i used you for your kindness. but if you’d give me the chance i’d be good to you. good for you. i- i never meant to hurt you.”

your cold gaze didn’t leave, “i don’t believe you.”

he sighs, “come here.”

he holds his hand out to you and you take it cautiously.

he leads you into the place where it all started, myrtle’s bathroom. he begins pulling a book out from his bag, and then he hands it to you.

“just look it over.” he says, his voice barely above a whisper.

you open the book and are immediately greeted by drawings. illustrations littering the pages, and they’re all of you.

you turn to one page, it’s a drawing of you outside studying. underneath the picture sat draco’s neat writing.

she came to calm me down today. fourth time this week. she still hasn’t told anyone. that means a lot to me. i again didn’t tell her why i was upset. it seems stupid to tell her about my problems. she’s too pure for them. i’d never want to upset her. i think i love her. i don’t know how. i barely even talk to her. but her hugs are nice. and she’s always so kind. i just wish i knew how to tell her what’s going on. i wish i wasn’t so scared of her rejection. it’s all too much. at least i have this. all of these pictures of her. now i cant forget her even if i tried. but of course, i’d never want to forget her.

you look up from the page. you cant help the few tears that escape your eyes.

“you loved me? the whole time? and you didn’t tell me?” you ask.

he bites his lip, “you didn’t tell me either. plus i knew i was a prat. i didn’t think you’d even want to be loved by someone like me.”

you huff out a pained breath, “draco i have loved you since the day you allowed me to comfort you. i wanted nothing more than to help you and to make sure you were ok.”

he doesn’t say anything, instead he envelops you in a tight hug. the embrace eases your worry and soothes the empty part of you. the two of you continue to hold eachother for minutes on end, and by the time you pull away you know draco meant every single word.

“please never stop caring.” he tells you.

“never.” you agree.

and you mean it. you can’t stop the way your heart beats for the blonde boy, and you didn’t want to. you love him. almost as if you needed to.