#also had a girls' night and watched disenchanted

[voidartisan]

Spent the entire afternoon in the kitchen with my roommates making food for friendsgiving yesterday and i think it officially qualifies as a religious experience

[starkskeep]

I am my mother's savage daughter (r. stark)

I am my mother's savage daughter r. stark oneshot

Pairings - Robb Stark x witch!Reader

Word Count - 1,500 words

Warnings - Morally grey characters, mentioned non-descriptive murder, mentioned non-descriptive self-harm for the sake of magic

A/N - Here is my first request from a lovely anon. If that was you, I hope I did your request justice.

Request: Hello I was hoping if you could write a Robb stark and witch reader, she is his closest advisor and with the help of her powers she helped him get revenge for his father,he announces he is to marry her after he wins the war and thanks her for her support "I wouldn't have done it without you type of thing?

Born as the daughter of Lord Roose Bolton and a noblewoman whose name has been lost to history, there have always been shadows that leak from your very soul. As a young girl, you were sent to be a ward of Lady Catelyn Stark in Winterfell. Perhaps it was a plan of your father’s to make you the future Lady of Winterfell, yet no betrothal to Robb came from your time there. Perhaps it was to keep you away from your bastard half-brother and his inclination to harm play with small defenseless things. Or perhaps it was because your father was afraid of you. Afraid of your potential. Afraid of what you would become if you were raised in a home that could provide no love to serve as a buffer to your whims. Many would try to claim that magic has long since disappeared in the kingdoms south of the wall but your father knew better. It was the power of your mother that drew him to her. A woman of a minor noble house that would not have drawn the attention of the ambitious Roose Bolton if it weren’t for the whispers that surrounded your late mother. With his own eyes, Roose saw how your mother controlled those around her. How the branches of trees and the flames of candles instinctively bent towards her as she walked past. A flick of her dainty wrist was able to send a man to his knees. An insult by a maid resulted in a fall down the stairs ending the maid’s life. After their marriage and your birth, your mother became disenchanted with your father and his control of her so he had her killed before he could become one of her puppets. It had also helped to quell the rumors slowly spreading from Dreadfort of his wife’s powers. She was just another woman weakened and eventually stuck down but the battle of the birthing bed.

So it was you who was raised amongst the Stark children. Receiving the love of the family had helped to tamper the power swirling underneath your skin but the execution of Lord Eddard Stark, a man who had raised you to be good in a way that your own father would have never been able to, ignited a burning sensation in your veins that you were unable to quell. You would wake up with scratches all over your body and blood underneath your fingernails. The voices that had once occasionally whispered to you now roared in your ears. They sang stories of the great battles yet to come. They warned you of betrayals when trust was placed in the wrong hands. In the course of a few weeks, you became a jaded shell of yourself, wholly devoted to the Old Gods and scarcely left the sanctity of the Godswood. 

Robb took you south with him, against the advice of his advisors. He could not leave you behind, just as he could not leave Theon behind. You were his friend and he knew you would prove to be an invaluable resource. He, of course, was proven correct. Roose, as one of Robb’s generals, watched as you cared for the wounded. Your remedies healed injuries and sickness far better than those concocted by others, despite using the exact same materials. Everyone praised your healing abilities as a blessing from the Gods. You treated Robb’s men and Lannister soldiers alike. Those who weren’t against the idea lauded you for your kind heart, Robb included. Roose watched as shadows slipped from underneath your tent when night fell and darkness cloaked the camp. The shadows, darker than the darkness around them, moved like snakes until they reached the beds of Lannister soldiers. The shadows would slither onto the cots and bedrolls of the enemy and smother them until the life left their eyes. There was no struggle. Healers would report the deaths in the morning as the soldiers merely having succumbed to their battlefield injuries. Roose watched as you were able to fake sympathy as you helped other healers carefully dispose of the bodies but he could see the shimmer in your eye, the same that once gleamed in his wife’s. 

If others had noticed, nothing was said. You had shown how valuable you were to Robb on the night when you shared your dreams with him. Not revealing that they were dreams, you made suggestions of what you thought the Lannisters may do. Most of the time you were proven to be correct and Robb gained the respect of his men due to the brilliance of his strategies. Robb kept you beside him in all of the war council meetings, allowing you to provide input when you deemed it necessary. In the eyes of his men, you were an oddity among women; one who had a brain and was useful for things other than running a household. You were given more freedom and would use it to sneak away. Running barefoot through the forests that often surrounded the placement of the war camp. Listening to whispers of the trees as you fed your blood back to the dirt. You did not question your abilities. You did what you instinctively knew to do. Coming back to the camp, your eyes would be brighter and your steps would be lighter. All the inhabitants of the camp wrote it off as you needing a break from the pressures. You were still a woman no matter the respect you received and thus were weaker and needed more breaks than the men. 

When the battles grew fiercer as Robb moved his army closer to the capital, whispers erupted of shadows helping the Northern army in their fight. Whispers spread even farther, to the Lannisters and beyond, of their men being taken down without the bite of steel even connecting with their bodies. Once again, this was brushed outside. Soldiers grow tired and delirious. Gossip grows crazier the more it is spread. King Robb is not King Stannis. He does not have a Melissandre by his side, filling his head with nonsense prophecies. He is a king fighting to avenge his father, rescue his sisters, and return to rule an independent North. You did not mind. You encouraged the rumors to grow more obscure. It kept you safe. It kept your actions from being examined too closely.

It was not until the night before Robb was to storm the Red Keep that you revealed your true nature to him. You revealed everything. Your healing, your killing, how you knew the movements of Lannister troops and what they would do in battle. Robb was shocked. He initially wanted to punish you for not telling him earlier but cooler heads prevailed and he realized that everything you had done was to aid him in his revenge, in your revenge as Ned was as much your father as he was Robb’s. So Robb listened. He listened as he did when you warned him not to agree to a Frey betrothal, to offer his uncle instead. He listened as he did when you warned him away from the pretty foreign healer. He listened as he did when you warned him to not allow Theon to sail for the support of his father’s ships and when you warned him not to accept your father’s request of sending your bastard brother to protect Winterfell. Now Robb listened even more closely as you explained what your shadows brought back to you from where you had sent them into King’s Landing, fully appreciating the weapon that the Gods had gifted him with.

You were by his side for the entirety of the siege. Riding just behind him and watching as he commanded his men to act in the way you had suggested the night before. You were standing in front of him when the Lannisters’ men shockingly turned against the royal family and its bastard king. He was beside you as he and his men watched the same Lannister soldiers then turn their swords against themselves. What was supposed to be a battle that would stain the throne room with the blood of both Lannister and Stark men ended with only lions left dead. 

After his coronation as King of the Seven Kingdoms, in which you placed the crown on Robb’s head and whispers a blessing of prosperity, protection, and power from the Old Gods, Robb announced that you would be his wife and queen. No one had provided more support to him than you did and he could see no other person than you by his side for the rest of his life. You were married in the ways of the Old Gods and the magic in your veins calmed for the first time since you had marched south. The Gods were pleased. They had one of their own blessed children on the throne and they kept the realm steady as long as your blood remained on the throne. 

[septembriseur]

From Stanley Cohen's States of Denial:

My earliest memory that could be called ‘political’ goes back to a winter night in Johannesburg in the mid-nineteen-fifties. I must have been twelve or thirteen. My father was away from home for a few days on business. Like many South African middle-class families (especially Jewish and anxious ones), we employed for these rare occasions a ‘Night Watch Boy’: that is, an adult black man – in this case an old Zulu (I vividly remember the wooden discs in his ear lobes)– working for a private security company. Just before going to bed, I looked out of the window and saw him huddled over a charcoal fire, rubbing his hands to keep warm, the collar of his khaki overcoat turned up. As I slipped into my over-warm bed– flannel sheets, hot water bottle, thick eiderdown brought by my grandmother from Poland– I suddenly started thinking about why he was out there and I was in here.

My mother always used to tell me that I was ‘over-sensitive’. This must have been my over-sensitivity at work, an inchoate feeling not exactly of guilt– this came later– but that something was wrong. Why did this old man have to sit out in the cold all night? Why had our family (and everyone like us) been allocated black men and women (who were called ‘boys’ and ‘girls’ or just ‘natives’) as domestic servants? Why did they live in tiny rooms in the backyard? Where were their wives, husbands and children? Why did they address me as ‘baas’, or ‘master’?

I don’t remember what I did with my bedroom epiphany. Almost certainly, I just dropped off to sleep. But later, even when I began to think sociologically about apartheid, privilege, injustice and racism, I would still return to some version of that early psychological unease. I saw this unease– correctly, I believe– as arising from a sense of knowing that something was deeply wrong, but also knowing that I could not live in a state of permanent awareness of this knowledge. Without my deliberate intention, this awareness would switch itself on or, more often, off. There might be weeks or months of blindness, amnesia and sleepwalking. Political education – later called ‘consciousness raising’ – made these phases less frequent, just as it should do.

Later, I started asking another question, one that I still discuss with people who grew up with me. Why did others, even those raised in similar families, schools and neighbourhoods, who read the same papers, walked the same streets, apparently not ‘ see ’ what we saw? Could they be living in another perceptual universe – where the horrors of apartheid were invisible and the physical presence of black people often slipped from awareness? Or perhaps they saw exactly what we saw, but just didn’t care or didn’t see anything wrong....

...By this time, my obsession appeared from an unexpected direction. In 1980, I left England with my family to live in Israel. My vintage sixties radicalism left me utterly unprepared for this move. Nearly twenty years in Britain had done little to change the naïve views I had absorbed while growing up in the Zionist youth movement in South Africa. It soon became obvious that Israel was not like this at all. By the 1982 invasion of Lebanon, I was already disenchanted with the liberal peace movement in which I thought I belonged. I drifted into what in Israeli terms is the ‘far left ’ – the margins of the margins.

I also became involved in human rights issues, particularly torture. In 1990,I started working with Daphna Golan, the Research Director of the Israeli human rights organization, B’Ttselem, on a research project about allegations of torture against Palestinian detainees. Our evidence of the routine use of violent and illegal methods of interrogation was to be confirmed by numerous other sources. But we were immediately thrown into the politics of denial. The official and mainstream response was venomous. Liberals were uneasy and concerned... Yet there was no outrage. Soon a tone of acceptance began to be heard. Abuses were intrinsic to the situation; there was nothing to be done till a political solution was found; something like torture might even be necessary sometimes; anyway, we don’t want to keep being told about this all the time.

This apparent normalization seemed difficult to explain. The report had an enormous media impact: graphic drawings of standard torture methods were widely reproduced, and a taboo subject was now discussed openly. Yet very soon, the silence returned. Worse than torture not being in the news, it was no longer news. Something whose existence could not be admitted, was now seen as predictable...

...It was natural to make the claustrophobic assumption that this problem was unique because Israel was uniquely horrible. Luckily our visitors from the international human rights community reminded us that the problem was universal. They were interested in information circulating in the international arena. How did audiences in North America or Western Europe react to knowledge of atrocities in East Timor, Uganda or Guatemala? I started imagining a nice thirty- something couple sitting, with their breakfast coffee and croissants, in New York, London, Paris or Toronto. They pick up the morning news- paper: ‘Another Thousand Tutsis Massacred in Rwanda’. In the mail plop two circular letters, one from Oxfam: ‘While you are eating your breakfast, ten more children starve to death in Somalia’, and one from Amnesty: ‘While you are eating your lunch, eight street-children are killed in Brazil’. What does this ‘news ’ do to them, and what do they do to the news? What goes through their minds? What do they say to each other?

[tilbageidanmark]

Movies I watched this week (#179):

71 Fragments of a Chronology of Chance, my 10th film by Michael Haneke, and the last part of his early 'Glaciation Trilogy'. Tense, murky and uncomfortable fragments of miserable and detached people, moving on with their daily chores without passion. All the while the television newscasts in the background drone on about wars, and massacres and other disasters. Unpleasant!

By now, I've seen all of his feature films, except of the two 'Funny Games' which, even as a completist, I have no desire to do.

🍿

1958 Côte d'Azur X 2:

🍿 My 6th melodrama by Otto Preminger, Bonjour Tristesse, and another where he collaborated with Saul Bass on the fanciful title sequence. A nearly-incestuous connection between suave cocksman and playboy David Niven (strutting most of the time in short shorts) with his spoiled and alienated daughter Jean Seberg. Based on the semi-biographical novella by Françoise Sagan, which she also had published at 17. Lifestyles of the carefree High-society on the French Riviera of the '50's, and the sensuality of the coast, the sun, the water. Tragic Manic Pixie Dream Girl Seberg, a disillusioned gamine with cropped short hair, disenchanted and confused.

🍿 "All the fashionable woman are wearing blue. (Except the English)..."

My 16th by Agnès Varda, Along the coast. If somebody has a hard-on for the notion of a coast vacation in the '50s, then this is for them Pure nostalgia straight into the veins, with impossible score by George Delarue, breezing through empty tourist spots of Saint-Tropez, Nice, Toulon, Monaco, Menton, Fréjus, Èze... Imagine if it was you, and you didn't know what you know now.... Simplement merveilleux! [*Female Director*]

Best film of the week!

🍿

“Are women magical?…”

More from The French Riviera, and another of my favorite re-watches ♻️: Truffaut’s meta-film 'La Nuit américaine'/Day for night. A perfect perfect film about movie making. There has never been a better one about the deep love for cinema, not '8 1/1', 'Contempt' or 'Singing in the rain', nor 'Sunset Boulevard', 'Get Shorty' or 'Boogie Nights'.

With another of George Delerue's sweeping scores, and with Nathalie Baye as Truffault's real-life script-girl Suzanne Schiffman, the one who kept it all together. And the cat. 10/10.

🍿

2 thrillers by Spanish Daniel Calparsoro:

🍿 To steal from a thief is a sophisticated heist story, with a crisp-sounding, exciting opening. Dynamic and drenched in heavy rains, it pulled me in. But as it continue, I came to realize that it's an exact copy of Spike Lee 'Inside Man', mixed with Jason Statham's 'The Bank Job' - but in Valencia. Too bad! I started to like it a lot.

🍿 Because he is considered one of the best 'Action' directors in Spain, I tried also his latest All the Names of God, but it was even worst. A taxi driver has to survive after being kidnapped by a Muslim suicide bomber in Madrid. But again, it just copied previous plots (Tom Cruise's 'Collateral', Dennis Hopper's 'Speed', as well as the surprise explosion at the beginning of 'Children of Men') without adding much else to it. 3/10.

🍿

The Gang's All Here (1943), directed by Busby Berkeley. My first joyful experience with Carmen Miranda (here in her famous The Lady In The Tutti-Frutti Hat number). Full of sexual innuendos from Brazil and cultural appropriations, still a wonderful entry to this world.

🍿

2 more movies about the Holocaust:

🍿 Toyland was the short German Oscar winner in 2009. A dark & moving story about 2 boys in 1942, who are best friends. When the Jewish family is being deported, the other boy decides to join his "blood brother", because his mother explains their moving, as 'they are going to Toyland'. 9/10.

🍿 "They'll have to drag me out of here. You know that."

My first re-watch of The Zone of Interest; This is not about mass murder, but about a family that lives on the other side of a wall. A father reading good-night stories to his daughter, a wife who pushes her husband to take her back to their favourite vacation place in Italy. The mundane as a chilling metaphor, with distant sounds as the only reminders. 9/10. ♻️

🍿

Legendary Thelma Schoonmaker X 2:

🍿 The Key to Reserva (2007) was a Martin Scorsese joke, constructed as a faux Hitchcock homage. In it he claimed that he discovered a previously-unknown script for an unproduced Hitchcock movie, and he went and filmed it "as the master would have done it today". But in reality it was just a fucking slick commercial for some cheap champagne brand! Very much like his other meta-film 'Goncharov'. Featuring Thelma Schoonmaker as herself, and suave Simon Baker as Cary Grant. 9/10.

🍿 My third by Spanish director Isabel Coixet, Learning to drive, a standard movie about simple connections. Patricia Clarkson is a literary editor whose husband left her, and Ben Kingsley a Sikh driving instructor in Queens, NY. With a surprising and funny tantric sex scene at the end of Act 2, and music score by George Harrison's son, Dhani.

I often think that Schoonmaker doesn't get enough credit for her work for Scorsese. Here there's no bravado, just clear and thoroughly enjoyable editing. [*Female Director*].

🍿

David Ehrlich X 2:

🍿 Talking about great editing, I saw David Ehrlich’s annual Video Countdown The 25 Best Films of 2023, again♻️. It was brilliantly edited by him. So far I've seen 13 14 of these 25 films, and plan to see most of the others (especially 'The boy and the Heron', which he rated as 'The best movie of the year').

🍿 From his list: La Chimera, my second by Alice Rohrwacher, and one of many starring her sister Alba Rohrwacher. A slow, interesting mood piece about some rustic Etruscan grave robbers in the 1980's. I couldn't get into it initially, until I realize that it was an Italian Magical Realism dream. Divination gets into the picture, and treasure hunting, and nostalgia for the past and for the dead. I didn't expect it to end like the Dutch 'Spoorloos', not even metaphorically, and maybe it didn't. [*Female Director*].

🍿

First time watching: While waiting for his 'Megalopolis', the chronicles of Coppola's wife from The Philippines, Hearts of Darkness: A Filmmaker’s Apocalypse. Documenting a self-indulgent genius, megalomaniac visionary, stubborn Macho Man, building an insane universe out of dreams. [*Female Director*].

🍿

3 by Slovenian Špela Čadež:

🍿 Boles is a dreamlike stop-motion tale about a young author with a writer's block. It is based on 'Her Lover', a sad short story by Maxim Gorky. It's depressingly Russian, and stylistically brilliant.

🍿 Steakhouse (2021), an uncomfortable and original masterpiece. Like Studio Ghibli FoodPorn, but where the sizzle signifies fear. An impatient husband prepares a steak for his wife's birthday - WOW!

🍿 In Nighthawk (2016) a drunken badger steals a cop car and goes on high-speed joy-ride that starts blurry and end up completely abstract. [*Female Director*].

🍿

All 3 of Ellie Wen's shorts:

🍿In the intimate little documentary Single Mother Only Daughter, a young woman calls her mother in Hong Kong, after she had nearly died in a car accident. It hits much too close to home for me - 10/10.

🍿 Share (2018) is about a very young 'influencer' who struggles with coming out to his family. Not too original.

🍿 The missfits are an all female high school robotics team from San Francisco. A PBS documentary. [*Female Director*].

🍿

"This country is not built for another civil war. It's going to be the first time in history that you'll see fat refugees..."

I always loved Colin Quinn. His 2019 stand-up Colin Quinn: Red state, blue state is one of funniest political shit since George Carlin died. Sharp observations, relentless pessimism, cynical solutions. 10/10!

🍿

2 From British director Adam Butcher:

🍿 Internet Story (2010) is a clever horror mystery, an early entry in the 'Screenlife' genre, where everything is revealed via computer and phone screens (Like 'Searching' and 'Missing', Etc.). It's a treasure hunt of old internet lore, which may or maybe not be true. Art imitates Life. 8/10.

🍿 The prevailing wind (2016), an ominous tale about a woman who's searching for her missing sister on some mysterious wind-swept moors, while a deadly chemical spill threaten their lives. Atmospheric, but a bit thin.

🍿

I'm going to continue watching even more short films (Found via this massive Letterbox list):

🍿 "Those who eat their fill, speak to the hungry Of wonderful times to come."

Dinner for Few (2015) is a harrowing Greek metaphor about the "Elite", 6 fat cats, actually fat pigs, who get to feast on all the food, while the cats milling between their feet gets only crumbs. 'Orwell's Animal Farm' on bad acid! The cycle never ends. 9/10. (Full Movie Above).

🍿 I am so proud of my 94 year old mother! I introduced her to James Joyce, and she is going right now through his 'Dubliners' collection, trying to figure it out. I haven't read it for many years, but I might pick it up again. Meanwhile, it seems that many of the Dubliners stories had been filmed [John Huston's 'The dead' was magnificent], so I started with James Joyce's the Sisters (2017), a faithful, somber and literary adaptation. This was Joyce's first published story.

🍿 Hunger, a bizarre Canadian animation short, that was the very first computer animated film nominated for an Oscar (in 1974). A guy can't stop stuffing his face.

🍿 Buster Keaton’s 2-reeler One week, his first independent production (1920). Newly-wed Keaton builds a modernist kit house. It includes a risqué scene where his half-naked lovely wife takes a bath and drops her soap. Before getting out and retrieving it, she breaks the 4th wall, motions to the photographer, whose hand appears and covers the lens. Astounding! 8/10.

🍿 My second by Norwegian André Øvredal (after ‘Troll Hunter’ which I couldn’t finish), The tunnel (2016) is a terrifying science-fiction short. A family returning from a day at the beach and getting stuck in a massive traffic line. Must be seen to be felt. 8/10.

🍿 Widdershins (2018) a weird Scottish steampunk animation about an orderly gentlemen who falls for a free-spirited sky-biker. Blade Runners via Wes Anderson.

🍿 Music for One Apartment and Six Drummers, a wordless comic musical about 6 percussionists who break into a Swedish apartment when the occupants leave, and who play rhythmic melodies using everyday objects they find there. Re-Watch from 2001. ♻️

🍿 The giving tree (1973), an animated version of the classic story, narrated by Shel Silverstein himself. Still not clear if it's about selfless love, or an abusive relationship.

🍿 Pitalev (2018), a fat teenager works at an Israeli 'Shipudiya' (fast food grill stall), and tries to score a date.

🍿 Papers, Please, an interesting Russian story about a border patrol officer sitting in a small booth, and having to decide on the fate of the people in front of him; Should they be allowed to enter this fictional country of Arstotzka, or denied? Apparently, it is based on a famous computer game!

🍿 Chuck Jones’s Duck Amuck (1953) was voted as the second ‘greatest cartoon of all time’ (after ‘What’s Opera, Doc’, also by Jones). It contains some serious 4th wall breaking.

🍿 Rhapsody in blue, the 3rd movement from 'Fastasia 2000'. 1930 New York City animated in the style of Al Hirschfeld.

🍿 More, Disney's Once Upon a Studio (2023), a 9-min. commemorative compilation for the company’s 100 year anniversary.

🍿 Also, Ghibli Studio's short Zen, Grogu and Dust Bunnies, a meditative crossover clip about Baby Yoda and the dust bunnies.

🍿 See Saw - A guy wakes up to discover that his personal information had been leaked all over the internet.

🍿 First watch: Adult Swim’s 2014 parody Too many cooks. Makes me regret that I’ve never watched sit-com television - Not!… 8/10.

🍿 Your mother and I (2016), based on a story by Dave Eggers. Another off-tone father-teenage daughter relationship, where the father talks and talks, mostly spinning bullshit stories about the mother which apparently is not there any more. 2/10. [*Female Director*].

🍿

(My complete movie list is here).

[courageoftheheart]

My ★★★ review of Wish on Letterboxd https://boxd.it/5im28n

Some critics say this is the worst Disney movie, but I wouldn't take it that low. It's just very frustrating to think of what could have been. There were so many ideas, setups and relationships that never had a payoff or were undercooked. 

Positives:

Even if the animation is a little off, there's still a very pretty watercolor aesthetic in the day time scenes and gorgeous color and light effects at night. King Magnifico playing around with his magic and spells is fun to watch. The singing is good, as well as the voice acting. I particularly liked Asha's interview scene with the king. It was a good place to start a connection and eventual conflict with the two. I would have loved to see a story with her being his apprentice and then having a slow falling out in their teacher/student relationship. I don't have much to say on Star except that he's cute and I like his animation. 

Negatives:

The movie relied too heavily on callbacks, which is unfortunately an unsettling trend in Disney movies as of late (Disenchanted, Chip N Dale, and most of the advertising for upcoming films). Because of this, none of the interesting set ups have any real payback. The King has a backstory that defines his beliefs in the present, but it doesn't get brought up again. He's just instantly a terrible person, because who knows? We're briefly told about Asha's father and how important he is without much involvement or flashbacks from him. The Queen loves and cherishes her husband, acting concerned when he is tempted by an evil book, until she doesn't. Why? Who knows? Girl boss power I guess, and feels no grief about the person she loved being corrupted. The stakes aren't very interesting either. I can enjoy a movie just fine with low stakes, but there at least has to be SOME. Whatever conflicts happen, it gets resolved pretty quickly. 

Extra thoughts:

I don't want to think about the negatives without also thinking about how it could have been better. What would have helped the plot in my opinion would be to let the events happen over a longer period of time. It would have given more time to see the influence of Asha's father over her mindset, those ideas budding heads with the King's ideology, the Queen's eventual falling out with her husband, his slow submission to evil, and the bond Asha has with her family, friends and the kingdom as a whole. 

[themaskedtree]

Just a heads up I’m about to go on a rant about something that happened a while ago but still pisses me off and this is the last time I’m going to talk about it unless someone asks me about it so if you don’t want to hear about it again just skip this . So a while ago the group of friends which was about 5 even though I only saw three of them as friends and liked three so if they somehow see this good luck trying to find out who it is! But two of them I’ve been friends with years and even went to school with so they knew me for years but still did that! But we played D&D together once a week at our own houses we never did a play in person and I only miss three session two because I was having car trouble and the other one because the night before playing I was using the bathroom a lot and didn’t get much sleep at all only two hours at most and I didn’t know why probably because of IBS was asking up. So I out out on my social medias to warn people that I’m not 100% they saw that the people in the D&D and said nothing about it all day until the incident happened. So I was tried all day but I didn’t think I was tired enough to just pass out like I did. Just so you know I posted that wasn’t feeling well around 1 or 2 in the afternoon and felt like crap all day and we normally played D&D around 6 to 7 sometimes 8 because they wouldn’t shut up about anime or anime porn which is just cringe. Also and still makes me uncomfortable. So they have 4 or 5 hours to ask me if I was ok and didn’t. One of them has a family member’s birthday party they he skipped to play D&D and blamed me for that even though I didn’t know until he yelled at me from making him miss it! Like dumb ass go be with family instead of playing a game! But I was watching disenchanted on my Xbox One with TheMaskedTree girl because it just came out on Disney plus and she liked the first one so we watched it and get halfway through until we had to pause it to eat dinner and afterwards it was 5:40 so she went go hangout with her cats and I was waiting for in bed for 6 to hit with mt phone on the charger because we did discord to talk and I don’t have a mic that works on my laptop and then I passed out. Now I didn’t know I was going to just fall asleep out of nowhere but it happens when you’re don’t get much sleep and having to use the bathroom a lot throughout the night and morning. But before I passed out I turned off my xbox and got on my iPad to was movies on there. So when I woke up I had a lot of miss calls and Snapchat/ discord messages. No one bothered to text my number or call my phone. But this guy in the group John I guess they pick him to be that Asshole to yell at me. So John sent me a bunch of messages on Snapchat so I responded to him telling him that I was sick and didn’t get much sleep and must have passed out. No he yelled at me for missing because I was sick but not at the other person for missing because of work and she would miss a lot of games not even showing up for most of them. So I went off on him for yelling at me for being sick and as him and I and text yelling at each other I called one of my other friends up and to explain to him what was going on. John even said that people pass out when they get sick but then continued to go off on me for ruining D&D when they had 4 people and 5 characters so yeah they still could have played. They didn’t care that I was sick or that I passed out. They only cared that I somehow ruined D&D night and that without my knowledge made one of the guys not go to a family’s birthday party! Don’t pick games over family and then blame someone who didn’t know for you missing it. So I had it with John texting him so I told him to call me so many times to yell at him for yelling at someone for being sick! The cowards wouldn’t and started to slow down on texting me. Then I got a text because John took a screenshot of our conversation which you can’t do unless you have the other person’s promise because that’s the law! It’s a violation of privacy. The conversation him and I have just showed my sticking up for myself!

[therealvinelle]

I've always wondered this, but what do you think the Cullen's political viewpoints would be, given their individual backgrounds? if vampires don't change after they turn, then surely they would all be extremely racist (especially Jasper). would this not come up at some point? they aren't like the Volturi because the Volturi are too old to care, but the Cullens are young enough that they have been brought up with opinions on stuff like sexism, racism, homophobia and the like.

Oh fuck.

You get an early answer because otherwise I'll just chicken out and delete this one, pretend I never saw it.

UMMM.

Since I'm guessing you meant American political viewpoints, we need a disclaimer. I am not American, and not too knowledgeable about your politics. Not just in the sense that I don't follow the day-to-day drama, but as I am not an American citizen there are several things I don't know, can't know because I've never lived in your country and therefore can't know what the effects of living in a country ruled by American policies is like. What I do know is based off of the news in the foreign section, social media (by which I mean tumblr posts), and Trevor Noah's Daily Show.

I am an outsider looking in.

Which is really rather appropriate, since the Cullens are too.

The Cullens go to high school and college, Carlisle works, they pay taxes, they own real estate, and submerge themselves in American culture. Esme, Edward, Rosalie, Emmett, and Bella are young enough that this is in many ways their world, and apart from timeouts they've more or less spent their entire lives, human and vampire, integrated into American society.

Not fully integrated, mind you, they do what they need to to fit in and get to school or, in Carlisle’s case, to work. They go no further. No extra-curriculars for the kids, no book clubs for Esme, no game nights for Carlisle. They walk parallel to humans, not among us.

In addition to this they're obscenely rich, which puts them another thousand miles from the experiences of your average American. They won't deal with the health system, which means healthcare is a non-issue, they're not going to need welfare or other social programs, unemployment is another non-issue. Name your issue, and the Cullens don't have personal stake in it. Even the climate crisis won't be a problem for them the way it will for us.

What I'm trying to say is, American political issues are a concept to them, not a lived reality. Just like they are for me. So hey, you made a great choice of blog to ask.

I'll also add here that you say the Volturi are too old to care, and I agree- from an ancient's point of view, racism is a matter of "which ethnicity are we hating today?", and it all looks rather arbitrary after a while. Same with every other issue - after a while it all just blends together into "what are the humans fighting over today? Which Christian denomination is the correct one? Huh. Good for them, I guess."

I can't put it any better than this post did, really. The Volturi are real people, humans are nerds and tumblr having Loki discourse. Aro thinks it's delightful and knows entirely too much about Watergate (and let's be real, Loki discourse as well), but the point I wanted to get at is that politics really don't matter to vampires.

And I don't think they matter to the Cullens either.

So, moving on to the next point while regretting I didn't put headlines in this post, I'll just state that I don't think vampires' minds are frozen. Their brains are unable to develop further, and they can never forget anything, but... well, this isn't the post for that, but in order for this to be true of vampires they would barely be sentient. They would not be able to process new impressions, to learn new things, nor to have an independent thought process. Yes, we see vampires in-universe (namely, Edward, who romanticizes himself and vampires) believe they're frozen and can never change, but there is no indication that this is a widespread belief, or even true. Quite the contrary - Carlisle went from a preacher's son who wanted to burn all the demons to living in Demon Capital for decades and then becoming a doctor and making a whole family of demons. Clearly, the guy has had a change in attitude over the years. Jasper, in his years as a newborn army general, slowly grew disenchanted with his life and developed depression. James initially meant to kill Victoria and hunted her across the earth, then became fascinated and changed his mind about it.

Had these people been incapable of change, Carlisle would still be hating demons, Jasper would be in Maria's army, and James would still be hunting Victoria.

It goes to follow, then, that they are able to adapt to new things.

The question is, would they?

Here I finally answer your question.

So, we have these people who don't really have any kind of stake in politics, who keep up to date all the same (or are forcibly kept up to date because high school) and are generally opinionated people.

Where do they then fall, politically?

(And this is where you might want to stop reading, anon, because I'm about to eviscerate these people.)

Alice votes for whoever's gonna win. She also makes a fortune off of betting each election. Trump's 1 to 10 victory in 2016 was a great day to be Alice. MAGA!

The actual policies involved are completely irrelevant, she does this because it's fun. Election means she gets to throw parties. Color coded parties for the Republican and Democratic primaries, and US-themed parties for Election Night! (Foreigner moment right here: I at first wrote "Election wake" before realizing that's not what y'all murricans call it.)

Alice loves politics. Doesn't know the issues, but she sure loves politics.

Bella votes Democrat. She actually knows about the issues, and cares about them. This girl is a Democrat through and through.

Carlisle doesn't vote. I can't imagine it feels right. Outside of faked papers he's not a US citizen, this is meddling in human affairs that he knows don't concern him.

More, this guy has never lived in a democracy.

In life, Carlisle lived under an absolute monarchy that, upon civil war, became an absolute theocracy. From there he learned that vampires live under a total dictatorship.

For the first 150 years of his life, democracy was that funky thing the Athenians did in history books thousands of years ago, no more relevant to him than the Ancient Egyptian monarchy is to me. Then the Americans, and later other European countries started doing this.

Good for them.

There's this mistake often made by those who view history from a... for lack of a better term, a solipsistic standpoint. A belief that the present day is the culmination of all of history. “My society is the best society, the most reasonable society; all the others had it backwards. Thank god we’re living in this enlightened age!”

The faith in our current system of government is one such belief. We (pardon me if this doesn’t apply to everybody reading this post) have grown up in democracies, being told this is the ultimate form of rule, and perhaps that is true - but remember the kings who have told their subjects they had were divine and the best possible ruler based on that. Remember also that most modern democracies haven’t actually been democracies for very long at all, America is the longest standing at some 230 years (not long at all in the grand scope of things) and they have a fracturing two-party system to show for it.

Every society, ever, has been told they’re the greatest, and their system of government the most just. Democracy is only the latest hit.

This is relevant to Carlisle because he’s immortal and decidedly not modern. Democracy has not been installed in him the way it was the rest of the Cullens, Jasper included. To him- well, it’s just not his world. He has no stakes in our human politics, and as he is older than every current democracy and has seen quite a few of them fall, he’s not going to internalize the democratic form of rule the way a modern human has.

I think the concept of voting is foreign to him.

It requires a level of participation in human society that he’s simply not at. He does the bare minimum to appear human so he do the work he loves, but nothing more, and I find that telling.

As it is I think he'd be iffy about his family doing it. He won’t stop them, but in voting they’re... well it’s kind of cheating. They’re not really citizens, none of this will affect them, and by voting they’re drowning out the votes of real human voters. He does not approve.

Edward votes Democrat. He's... well he’s the kind of guy who will oil a girl’s bedroom window so he can more easily watch her sleep without being discovered, justifying it to himself as being okay because if she were to tell him to get lost he’d stop immediately. Same guy is so sure that he’d leave and never return again if she wanted him to, except this is the man who returned to Forks to hang around his singer, knowing there was a significant chance he might kill her. To say nothing of his Madonna/Whore complex, or of the fact that he tried to pimp out his wife twice, and was willing to forcibly abort her child.

This guy is very much in love with chivalry, with being an enlightened and feminist man who supports and respects women, while not understanding the entire point of feminism, which is female liberation.

He votes Democrat because he’s such an enlightened feminist who cares about women’s rights.

Emmett doesn’t care to vote, but if he has to he votes Republican. The guy is from the 1930′s, and has major would-be-the-uncle-who-cracks-racist-jokes-if-he-was-older vibes.

Esme doesn’t vote, that would require getting out of the house.

More, I just... can’t see it. I can’t see her being one to read up on politics and The Issues, period, but if she has to then I doubt she’d be able to decide.

Jasper doesn’t vote. Alice can have her fun, he does not care.

There’s also the whole can of worms regarding the last time he went to bat for American politics.

I imagine he stays out of this.

Renesmée doesn't vote. She has no stock in the human affairs. Who would she vote for, on what grounds? When Bella tries to pull her to the urns, she points out that she's three years old.

Rosalie, guys, I’m sorry, but that girl is definitely gonna vote Republican. Perhaps not right now as it’s become the Trump party of insanity, but the Mitt Romney type of Republicans? Oh yes.

And for the record, yes I imagine she does vote. To step back from politics would be another way she was relinquishing her humanity, and that’s not allowed to happen. So, yes, she goes to the urns, less for the sake of the politics involved and more because like this, she’s still a part of society in some way.

Now, onto why I think she’s Republican, I think it’s both fiscal and social.

This girl was the daughter of a banker who somehow profited off of the Depression, and who then became part of a family with no material needs that would soon become billionaires thanks to Alice. Poverty to Rosalie is a non-issue, as it is I imagine she views it as a much lesser issue than what she’s had to deal with. The humans can pull themselves up by their bootstraps, Rosalie’s infertility is forever.

Rosalie’s empathy is strongest when she’s able to project onto others, and she won’t be able to project onto the less fortunate at all.

Then there’s the fact that the Republican party is all about traditional family values, and pro-life.

Rosalie, a woman from the 1930′s who idolizes her human life and who‘d love nothing more than to get to live out this fantasy, is down for that. And as of Breaking Dawn she’s vocally pro-life, so there’s that.

This all being said I don’t think Rosalie cares to sit down and fully understand these politics she’s voting for, the possible impact they’ll have- that’s not important. What’s important is what voting does for her.

TL;DR: I bet anon regrets asking.

[mieux-de-se-taire]

The Black Parade - Part 3

This is the final installment of my song-by-song review of TBP. You can also check out the first 2 parts of TBP as well as reviews of Bullets and Revenge on my blog.

Sleep - this fucking song, my god, one of my favorites off TBP, I go insane every time I listen to it, the way it starts with that audio clip of Gerard talking about night terrors with a simple repeating piano melody in the back and then goes full throttle at 0:31, and later when that audio clip comes back at 2:47 and the song slowly builds until the guitars go fully insane, god, with Gerard absolutely wailing “wake up” in the background, this song feels like an exorcism, everything from 3:11 to 4:24 is one of my favorite parts in any MCR song, and then there’s the lyrics, “The hardest part is letting go of your dreams”, “Three cheers for tyranny / unapologetic apathy / cause there ain’t no way that I’m coming back again”, “The hardest part’s the awful things that I’ve seen” (jesus christ), and ending it all with the line “I can’t ever wake up”, screaming. And the backstory makes it even worse: “Gerard would struggle to sleep and would go on to suffer what he called ‘night terrors’ in which he said it felt as though someone was gripping his throat and squashing his lungs. He used it as inspiration for the song ‘Sleep’, written in the studio around the same time as ‘Famous Last Words’, but it pointed to the intensity of the experience. He became obsessed with Joan of Arc, and considered shaving his head as she had once done. He bought countless films about her and would watch them alone in his room, prompting nightmares in which he watched her burning alive” (The True Lives of My Chemical Romance, 147).

Teenagers - such a fun song, my god, so deceptively theatrical and almost goofy but containing such a poignant message, it doesn’t really fit in with the rest of the album as it has nothing to do with the concept, but I totally understand why they kept it in, it’s loud and in-your-face and catchy as hell, I like how it starts very simply before bringing in full instrumentation, which allows the lyrics to really take center stage, I love the snare(?) thing at 0:33, 1:25, 1:44, and 1:59, my favorite part is the lines “The boys and girls in the clique / the awful names that they stick / You’re never gonna fit in much kid” at 0:51, I just love Gee’s delivery so much, I also really like the scream at 2:16. If you want some great lore on the song, check out the full album commentary at 29:10-32:26, which you can also find on the deluxe version of the album as “My Chemical Romance Welcomes You to the Black Parade” (at least on apple music), in it Gerard sums up the song at 31:39 by saying, “It’s a very important song because it talks about how teenagers are engendered to violence and how they’re watched over and how they’re over-medicated and how they’re a group of people that, they feel that they -- a lot of them are made to feel like they can only solve their problems with violence, a lot of them are made to feel invisible. And this is a song that addresses a lot of issues about kids lashing out against other kids, lashing out against society.” Underneath all the glitz and playfulness is a deeply powerful social commentary that is still relevant to this day. On a lighter note, the music video is a blast, from Gerard spasming at 1:29 to Ray cowering at 2:26. I imagine it was very fun to film, especially the ending when the stage is stormed

Disenchanted - overshadowed by a lot of the more elaborate and theatrical songs on the album, but possessing one of the most impactful messages on TBP, largely because of how universal the sentiment is, fairly simple and stripped down, especially in the beginning, but so pure and powerful, it took me a while to understand why they put it directly after teenagers because it’s such an abrupt tone shift, but it makes total sense, because after the intensity and angst of your teen years you’re expected to just settle into adulthood and ignore the disappointments and injustices of the world, disenchanted is about the disillusionment and apathy of being in your 20s and idly letting life pass you by and never making a difference, and it’s so mundanely soul-crushing, listening to the lyrics properly is always a gut punch, god, the quiet everyday tragedy of “I spent my high school career / spit on and shoved to agree / so I could watch all my heroes / sell a car on TV” and don’t even get me started on “You’re just a sad song with nothing to say / about a lifelong wait for a hospital stay”, jesus fuck, one of their most cutting lines, on a record all about high stakes like war and death, disenchanted is so easy to overlook, but it’s one of their most haunting and relevant songs, thank god for Mikey Way. The full album commentary I mentioned for teenagers also has some very interesting (and funny) info about disenchanted, at 32:59-35:17

Famous Last Words - one of my all time favorites, just an amazing song, the intro may be my favorite MCR intro, the way Gerard grits his teeth when he says “But where’s your heart”, god the audible pain and anger in his voice, and knowing it’s about Mikey when he left the Paramour, christ, just everything from 0:00 to 0:32, the simple but memorable guitar melody, the way the drums and guitar punctuate the phrase “I know”, pure perfection, it’s my second favorite part of the song, then there’s the chorus and by god Gee did not hold back with the lyrics, I mean “I am not afraid to keep on living / I am not afraid to walk this world alone” is about as blunt as you can put it, but it’s so powerful how unflinchingly and unapologetically direct it is, one of the interesting things about this song is how all the metaphor Gee is usually so fond of is almost entirely absent, but the raw sentiment stands on its own, and the chorus becomes this rallying cry, (speaking of lyrics, I adore the line “A love that’s so demanding / I can’t speak”), the breakdown at 2:38 is phenomenal (thank you Ray Toro), but then comes the bridge at 3:08 and I start to go insane, god the way everything falls away to highlight Gerard’s voice and the lyrics, and the fucking lyrics, “I see you lying next to me / with words I thought I’d never speak / Awake and unafraid / Asleep or dead” how am I supposed to be normal about this, I want the words “awake and unafraid, asleep or dead” tattooed on my body, god, and then it builds so majestically and beautifully, and then Gee starts wailing “Asleep or dead” and my soul starts ascending, christ, and the layered harmony that starts at 4:10 with the chorus coming back in with the line “or dead” soaring in the background, it’s totally breathtaking, the entirety of 3:08 to the end is my favorite part, what a way to end the album, concluding a record about tragedy with a powerful message of resilience and hope, the song is so brutal and honest yet uplifting, it’s extraordinary. And the video, my god, very simple conceptually but executed brilliantly, you can tell they’re all really tired because they all have this manic, desperate energy about them, and it really adds to the performance. The making of video is rough, seeing all the injuries they got just from this one shoot, but still very interesting (check out 5:56 and 11:16), and the outtakes video is fun, especially 1:40, 8:09, and 9:11. And finally, a very long quote: 

“One night at 4 a.m., two weeks after Mikey’s departure, Gerard heard Ray playing around with a song then called ‘The Saddest Music in the World’. Gerard says Ray would often play alone late at night at that time and that ‘it sounded like he was fighting his guitar, frustrated that he couldn’t play our songs.’ This time, Gerard joined him. The two of them started working on Ray’s music while Gerard emptied into it his fears and frustration about Mikey...It was as if Gerard’s feelings about his brother had been the cork that was blocking their creativity. Once he let those feelings out with Ray, music began to flow once more...Heartfelt, brutally honest and anthemic, it would become known as ‘Famous Last Words’ and would eventually close The Black Parade. It was a hell of a thing to write about your struggling brother, as Gerard’s lyrics sharply challenged Mikey’s spirit over angry, soaring guitars. But it came to take on more meaning as Gerard wrote. It evolved from being a song about Mikey, to being a song about the band in general. It became something very powerful. ‘Right away I felt like I was singing about the thing I was most afraid of,’ Gerard said. ‘It felt like what it meant to be in this band, it felt like it was about Mikey, and it felt like it was about our lives, thinking of yourself as despicable or hated.’ All it lacked was a chorus. That came later, when Gerard was alone in the studio. ‘We all left to get coffee,’ said Ray, ‘and we came back an hour later and Gerard had done this awesome layered chorus. It was so inspiring – the words that he was singing, the melody, it came out of nowhere really. It tied the whole song together and ties the whole record together.’ It would be the chorus that offered the song some balance. While the verses questioned and criticized, the chorus was uplifting and proud, offering some hope amid the despair, as Gerard defiantly and pointedly sang that he would keep on fighting for life. It was a line that would define the record. With such conflicting emotions, Ray was keen to ensure his guitar solo captured the fraught mood. He had long been influenced by Ozzy Osbourne’s late guitarist Randy Rhoads and turned to his playing for inspiration. He knew he needed to write something that mirrored the emotion of the lyrics, something frantic but fraught. He went to bed that night listening to his favourite Rhoads solos and, on waking up, immediately reached for his guitar and laid down the first thing that came to him. His spontaneous guitars became vital to the song...‘We all got a shot of inspiration when that song came together,’ said Frank. ‘It gave us a new life, a new hope. It really put us back in the mindset of making a great record.’ Even when Mikey returned to The Paramour and heard what the band had been working on in his absence – essentially, a song that was inspired by him – the mood remained high. Because despite its subject matter, the bassist realized quite how glorious ‘Famous Last Words’ was. He told them it was an anthem.” (The True Lives of My Chemical Romance, 151-152)

Blood - genuinely one of the funniest things they’ve ever done, you spend 49 minutes listening to a very serious and emotional rock opera concept record about cancer and death and grief and guilt and perseverance with an epic inspiring show-stopping ending, and you think it’s over but you don’t bother to stop or restart it (because you’re probably still reeling from the rollercoaster of emotions you just experienced), and for a minute and a half there’s silence, and then all of a sudden you hear a jaunty little piano tune and “Well they encourage your complete cooperation”, and you spend the next minute and a half listening to a satirical ditty about fake blood complete with nonsensical lyrics, cartoonish ghost sounds, and weird lip noises, they’re all insane for this, literally incomprehensible, I know it’s poking fun at all the photoshoots with fake blood they did during Revenge, but to put it at the end of TBP, I have no words, pure comedy gold. And then they went and made a video for it, and it’s literally just them fucking around awkwardly in a locker room while cheerleaders dance seductively against the lockers, what even

Sorry for how long Famous Last Words got. I tried to cut down the quote to its essentials, but there was a lot I wanted to include. I’m finally done with TBP (I’m doing the b-sides later). I’ll probably do Danger Days next, then Conventional Weapons, even though CW was written first. Feel free to share your own thoughts and opinions

[ladykissingfish]

Dining Out with the Akatsuki

Pein

The Pein-body doesn’t need food to sustain itself, but Nagato has made it so that he can taste and experience eating through the body. Surprisingly his favorite dish is a simple fish stew, which he enjoys several bowls full of, paired with a beer or two and a few pieces of delightfully crusty bread. But more so than the food, Nagato enjoys “being” with the others, especially Konan. When they were younger he and the blue haired beauty were often on the brink of total starvation, so to be able to afford the luxury of eating prepared foods in a nice establishment, and to do so with FRIENDS, is a dream that he’d never have dared to dream. Is a very tidy eater, and constantly makes sure the others are keeping their areas clean, so as not to make too much work for their waiter/waitress. The type to, if he thinks the server has too many empty plates and glasses to take back, will get to and help that person carry the empties back to the kitchen. Also makes sure everyone tips, even Kakuzu.

Konan

When going out to eat, Konan will always order a salad. That’s it. And it’s not because she’s a dainty eater; it’s because she knows beyond a shadow of a doubt that every other member of the Akatsuki will be sharing large portions of THEIR food with her. Even Kakuzu will push whatever cheap dinner he’s bought across the table to her and gruffly tell her to take some of whatever’s there. The waiter or waitress will come back to the table to refill drinks and be confused that the delicate-looking salad girl is elbows deep in fries, ribs, steak, and anything else the group has pressed on her. And dessert is another matter entirely. ALL of them (with the exception of Kakuzu because he feels sharing his dinner was more than enough) will fight over who gets to buy Konan dessert. Usually settled with spirited games of rock-paper-scissors, and the winner gets to pick (and buy, of course) what sweet treat Konan gets. Also she never ends up paying for the salad she initially ordered, either, as the one buying her dessert will usually go ahead and spring for that, as well.

Hidan

Hidan is a big meat-eater, so when they go out to eat will typically order several pork, chicken, or beef-based dishes. His favorite is spare ribs, and he’s such an aggressive eater that the sauce will ruin whatever shirt he’s been made to wear for the evening. Watching him eat things like steak is always a bit gross, as he orders it cooked as rare as possible and always makes a big production out of licking the excess blood from his arms/the plate. He isn’t really a fan of sides, though, in particular vegetables; and will always push off the undesirables on his plate to whoever’s sitting closest to him (most often Kakuzu who will take whatever’s offered because hey, free food). He’s also one of the few who won’t order any sort of alcoholic drink with his meal, as he claims Jashinism prohibits the consumption of such things. Sodas or sweet fruit punches are his thing, and he drinks so much of this that he’ll end up rushing to the bathroom to pee a bunch before the meal is over. Is the fastest eater in the bunch so will try and start arguments or have arm wrestling contests with the others to pass the time along. If the waitress is pretty, he’ll flirt shamelessly and leave a big enough tip to make Kakuzu faint.

Kakuzu

It takes a LOT to get Kakuzu to go out and eat with everyone; he’s the epitome of the “we have food at home” mantra. When he does, he’ll always go for the absolute cheapest meal on the menu, even if the dish isn’t something he particularly likes. Also isn’t shy about using his advanced age to his advantage, to make use of senior specials and coupons. Always requests for there to be no salt in his meal because “too much sodium raises blood pressure which is bad for the heart”, and after all he’s got several hearts to take care of. Doesn’t really partake in the conversations at the table except to occasionally comment to the others about food being left on their plates; yes, even with the others paying for their own meals, he’s still hyper concerned about wasting money. The only time he likes going out to eat is his birthday, when everyone else will chip in to buy his meal for him. A big Sake drinker and will have almost an entire bottle ((of the cheapest kind)) with his meal, but he holds his liquor so well that he never seems drunk.

Sasori

Doesn’t eat but going out with the others is one of the few things he enjoys. He is someone who prefers elegant, quiet atmospheres, therefore favors going to smaller, somewhat exclusive restaurants. Since his attention isn’t focused on food, he’ll get up and wander from the table a lot, taking in the artwork (if any) on the walls. Has a special (and unexpected) talent, in calming down the fussy children of other diners. Because he’s curious about everything, he’ll ask Deidara or Itachi to describe their meals to him in heavy detail.

Deidara

This guy can eat. He, Hidan and Tobi are the biggest eaters in the company, so when everyone goes to a restaurant or cafe together, separate checks are a necessity ((Kakuzu: All I had was tea! Why should we split the bill when those fucks had 12 plates each?!)) Shares a slight commonality with Kakuzu in that his favorite meal is fish-based, and Kisame has taught him well in regards to knowing whether a fish is fresh or not. He isn’t the neatest diner, and will constantly be reminded by Pein or Konan to tidy up his area before the waiter/waitress comes back to the table. Will ALWAYS ask the server about the specials of the day, even though 9 times out of 10 he already knows what he’s going to order. Deidara has the ability to taste food through his hands, and will sometimes make a show of eating with all three mouths at once (which fascinates the other diners but leaves his own team disenchanted, to say the least). Can easily be goaded into eating “competitions” with Hidan, which almost always results in severe stomachaches and a need to be carried back to the hideout by their respective partners.

Tobi

What’s an entree? This guy will always go straight for the dessert menu. At first Pein and the others tried to stop him, telling him dessert was only to be had after a balanced meal; but Tobi’s tendency to eat a single bite of an expensively-priced steak quickly convinced the others to mind their own business. Whether at home or out to dinner, meal times are the only times he removes his mask; he still wears a rough black cloth over his eyes but without the mask everyone can see the (slightly scarred) bottom half of his face — and his smile. Which he does a lot; it’s obvious that spending time with the others means a great deal to him. His voice changes just slightly too — he still says the most out of place, goofy things, only in a much deeper tone of voice. Deidara especially is completely thunderstruck by how calm and quiet and NORMAL Tobi seems without the mask, and comes up with the (correct) theory that Tobi literally becomes a different person with that orange monstrosity on. Can be goaded into eating contests with Deidara and Hidan, although his food tolerance isn’t as high as these two and will more than likely spend all night in the bathroom.

Zetsu

Never ever joins the others when they dine out. Like never. Will occasionally use his exceptional scouting skills to scope out new venues for the group, but that’s as far as it goes.

Kisame

Restaurants aren’t really his thing, so (as in many other circumstances) will only accompany the others if Itachi goes as well. Like Pein and Deidara, goes mostly for fish-based meals, although he does enjoy an extra rare steak on occasion. Doesn’t drink alcohol but will order many cups of tea or, in the winter, cocoa. Is one of the few in the group who knows just how bad Itachi’s eyesight has gotten, so will always lean close and quietly whisper to him things on the menu that he thinks he’d like to eat. Enjoys eating establishments where they play soft music; it always puts him in a relaxed state of mind. Kisame is like Pein in that he abhors rudeness towards servers and restaurant staff, and will jump in quickly (and often very harshly) to “reprimand” anyone he feels is being an ass, whether it be another customer or his own team mates. Has gotten into a fistfight with Hidan twice over some of the more lewd things he’s said to waitresses, one of which got the whole group banned from that particular place. Doesn’t like desserts but will ask both Itachi and Konan what THEY would get for dessert, orders both things, and gives it to them.

Itachi

Like Kisame, dining out isn’t really his deal, but will go every now and then when the “persuasion” of the others wears him down (Deidara: You antisocial asshole; are you too good to spend time with us or what, hm?!). Prefers places that are small and dimly lit; bright lights hurts his eyes immensely and he’s never been comfortable in large crowds of people. A trick his father taught him when he was younger was that, when eating in a public place, always go with somebody you can trust to keep an eye on the entrance for possible enemies; so Itachi will always sit in a spot where he’s facing the door, to protect the rest of the group. Eats his food slower than the others (everyone thinks it’s because he savors his meal but really it’s because he has trouble seeing it), and, like Tobi, is a bigger fan of desserts than the entree. Also has a thing with napkins; will sit and tear one napkin up into dozens of tiny strips while the others talk to each other, or sometimes shows off Konan’s origami lessons by turning them into little flowers or birds. Hidan gets easily annoyed by him because Hidan flirts mercilessly with every female in sight — but Itachi simply sits there quietly and has every female in the restaurant staring at him with wide eyes and lovesick faces. Hasn’t once left a restaurant without being asked out by at least 3 women (all of whom be very politely turns down, but still).

[mostlycompetentwriter]

“School Life:” A Hoodie Season AU Prequel

F/M Pairing: Y/N x Hwang Hyunjin (SKZ)

Genre: Married Life AU (Hoodie Season Prequel)

Word Count: 3K

Warnings: Mild Language

Summary: When Y/N is hired as the librarian at her former high school, she isn’t exactly thrilled to return. Of course, there’s also the issue of the persistent dance teacher who seems determined to win her affections.

Here’s a funny story: imagine promising yourself that you’d attend college, nail an awesome degree, and then find a job making six figures on an annual basis, only to return home with a teaching license to work at the same school that you attended when you were 16 while making less than acceptable.

Yeah, life had a funny way of making a joke out of itself, and the punch line is never really that good. 

But there wasn’t time for me to complain about my prospects since I had been unemployed for six months with a lousy degree in literature that led to absolutely nothing. In desperate times, we’re often forced to do things that we hate, and I was certainly disenchanted with the idea of working in a high school library surrounded by horny and immature devils all the time. 

“Good morning, Y/N!”

Oh, and I also had to deal with one of the most annoyingly persistent men on a regular basis. “What do you want, Hyunjin?”

Despite my dismissive tone, Hyunjin still leaned in across the check-out counter, and I could feel his eyes staring at my ass. “It’s my free period.”

“And?”

“And...you should come have coffee with me,” Hyunjin said, and I finally turned around to endure his flirtatious smile. It had only been two months since the start of the semester, and a grand total of two weeks since Hyunjin had first started trying his luck with me. But I was beginning to think that he didn’t know how to take a hint. 

“I’m busy with paperwork,” I said, ignoring his crestfallen expression. However, in my defense, I wasn’t looking for a relationship, and I was far too preoccupied with my own self-loathing to entertain his advances.

“Again?” he pouted, giving me a look that I’m sure won the heart of any girl that he had the chance to impress.

It was too bad that they didn’t work on me. 

“Bye, Hyunjin,” I said, giving him a cheeky smile before disappearing into my office.

The next morning, I noticed that Bang Chan, one of the upperclassman teachers, had arranged to pick up some books for his students. It required some set-up on my end with the computer system, and I was completing the necessary paperwork when Chan walked into the library. “Good morning, Y/N,” he said with a pleasant smile.

“Mr. Bang,” I greeted him in return. “I brought an empty cart for your request.”

“Perfect!” Chan smiled, walking around the counter to pull the cart towards the surrounding bookshelves.

I watched him from the corner of my eye while inputting the final codes for my spreadsheet. “Is this for a class project?”

Chan lifted his head from where he was examining a nearby book display. “Oh! Yeah, the kids like it when we do this kind of stuff. Well, I mean, they don’t like reading so much, but it’s better than tests.”

I nodded my head because I could certainly appreciate that considering some of the more stringent high school examinations that I recalled from my teenage years. “The school wants me to read you this long and boring list of protocols after you check-out something.”

“Yeah...” Chan trailed off with a chuckle. “Do you want to do it now...or?”

I grinned, closing out one of the tabs on my computer screen before joining Chan by the bookshelves. This close, I could appreciate the subtle scent of his cologne and his easygoing smile. “I think we can just skip it,” I said, raising a brow. “I’m sure you’ve heard it before.”

“You’ll let me off easy, Y/N?” Chan asked, turning around with a knowing look and I reveled in our simple flirtation. 

“Since you’ve been so nice,” I said, breaking off when I heard the door to the library open again.

“There you are!” Hyunjin announced his presence, waltzing over to the two of us without a single care in the entire world. “How can I last all day without seeing this smile?”

I sighed when said smile disappeared. “What did you do before I came here?”

“It was a lonely workplace,” Hyunjin said, and I noticed the way that he had positioned himself between me and Chan.

“Anyway,” Chan continued, attempting to speak over Hyunjin despite his unexpected presence. “As a thank you, Y/N, would you like to come to the school’s basketball game this Friday? I coach the men’s team, and we’re undefeated this year.”

“Really?” I asked.

“Oh, it’s basically a tradition,” Hyunjin intervened, sending Chan a look. “The boys love the support from their teachers.”

“But Hyunjin, you don’t even-”

“You’ll come, right?” Hyunjin asked, interrupting Chan’s train of thought. In return, the older man merely shrugged before occupying himself with the task of stacking the books that he required onto the cart. 

I studied Hyunjin’s beaming expression because, in all honesty, it was one of the very last things that I wanted to do, but it seemed unusually important - which meant that a small part of me was quite curious. “I guess I can try and clear some time,” I said with a shrug.

Hyunjin’s smile was impossibly large, and he leaned against Chan’s cart like he wanted to look as cool and laid-back as possible. “You know, Y/N,” he started. “I think you and I share a lot in common.”

“I doubt that,” I said with a tense smile.

“We both care a lot about our students,” Hyunjin said, and I tried not to laugh because Hyunjin couldn’t begin to imagine just how much I didn’t want this particular job on my resume. “We’re also good-looking people.”

The comment was shallow, and I didn’t feel that impressed by his attempt to compliment me. Meanwhile, Chan snorted around a laugh as he pushed his cart back, nearly sending Hyunjin sprawling into the floor. “I have things to do,” Chan said, excusing himself politely while a flustered Hyunjin tried to play off his decidedly uncool moment.

“If only your students were around to see this...” I trailed off with a distracted sigh, leaving Hyunjin behind spluttering out nonsensical words while I returned to the sanctity of my private office.

On Friday night, I parked my car near the back of the school before entering the loud and unusually crowded gymnasium where, for just a split second, I almost considered walking back out the door. It smelled like sweat and dirty laundry, and the bleachers looked uncomfortable, especially since everyone was forced to sit shoulder-to-shoulder. “What fresh hell is this?” I grumbled, shouldering off my jacket since I definitely wouldn’t need it.

I proceeded to walk around the proximity of the gym, searching for familiar faces. I spotted Chan standing on the sidelines with another teacher (Changbin, maybe?) before I realized that someone was calling my name from behind me. I turned around to greet Han Jisung, one of the Freshman English teachers, and he pointed to a section where I recognized several other staff members. “You can join us if you want,” Jisung said and I nodded my agreement.

He led us through the crowd of eager fans, keeping an eye on me as I teetered precariously on the old bleachers wearing high heels that I definitely regretted. But at the very top, I could see some familiar faces, including one that appeared far more eager than the rest. “Oh, Y/N,” Hyunjin said. “I’m glad to see you. It’s nice to have the teachers support our teams.”

“You never come to the basketball games,” Felix said, and Hyunjin shot him a silencing glare.

“What are you talking about, Felix?” Hyunjin asked with wide eyes. “I always support the school.”

“Sure,” Seungmin snorted as if he was simply placating Hyunjin’s obvious fabrication.

“Yeah, I heard it was something else,” I said, taking a seat next to Han before turning my attention to the game.

I wasn’t a big sports fan by any means, and I struggled to make sense of the chaos that included a bunch of teenage boys running up and down the court wearing their brightly-colored uniforms. Sometimes a whistle blew or the shot clock made a truly horrible sound when the buzzer went off to conclude the end of game-time. Otherwise, I felt utterly confused as I sat back and nodded when one of the other teachers surrounding me made a comment that I certainly didn’t understand.

When the game reached halftime, Hyunjin immediately stood up from his seat, starting down the staircase as he chanced a look back over his shoulder. “They have refreshments outside,” he said to me. “My treat?”

I placated him with a nod, following him into the slowly forming crowd attempting to migrate outside of the gymnasium where the smell of pizza and nachos was especially prominent. Hyunjin and I stood at the back of the line, and I swallowed down a feeling of claustrophobia. Meanwhile, I hadn’t noticed that Hyunjin was looking at me until he finally made his voice audible over the white noise of the surrounding crowd. 

“I think we got off on the wrong foot,” Hyunjin said, giving me, what I assumed, was his best attempt at a humble expression. “I’m sorry if I’ve done something to offend you...”

“It’s not so much that,” I said. “But it’s tiresome to see you put so much effort into flirting with me.”

“Oh...” Hyunjin said, clearing his throat awkwardly, but he also seemed hurt by my admission. “I’m not, like, some kind of serial dater or something. I genuinely thought you were interesting when we met at the teacher’s conference for the first time.”

“You did?” I asked, studying this vulnerable version of Hyunjin with close scrutiny.

“Yeah.” He nodded, adjusting the beanie hugging the crown of his hairline. “I’m kinda bad at this type of thing, but you’re different from the others. I think you and I both know that’s not always a bad thing, and I was hoping that you might at least give me one tiny little chance at a date.”

I gave him my full attention then, and I found myself taken aback by the look of earnest interest reflecting back at me in warm swirls of brown. “Okay,” I said, deciding that it couldn’t possible hurt to give him an opportunity. “But do me a favor and at least have a better excuse the next time you come into the library,”

Hyunjin had the decency to blush, and I couldn’t help but smile as we took another step forward.

It was Saturday evening when Hyunjin picked me up in front of my small apartment complex. I settled next to him in the front seat, smiling in his direction when he extended a tentative greeting. “How are you, Y/N?” he asked, and I was surprised to hear a hint of nervousness in his tone.

“I’m good,” I said. “But what’s this surprise all about, Hyunjin?”

“No spoilers,” Hyunjin said, and he seemed to regain some semblance of his former confidence as we drove down the crowded city streets in the direction of the main interstate.

“Well, I expect something classy since you made such a big deal about dressing up for the occasion,” I said, reaching down to smooth my hands along the hemline of my skirt.

“I don’t know much about you,” Hyunjin admitted. “But I had a friend give me some advice.”

“Dating advice?” I questioned, smirking in his direction. “You must not go on very many dates.”

“Not really,” Hyunjin remarked. “Despite what you might be thinking, it’s never been a big thing for me.”

I contemplated his words, watching as he drug his bottom lip between his teeth to worry the skin. “Why?”

“I don’t know,” Hyunjin said. “I guess I’m not very good at making connections with people. I’ve been told that I can come on too strong.”

I laughed at the honest assessment. “Maybe you just need more practice.”

“Yeah,” Hyunjin agreed. “But is that okay with you? I mean, now that you know that I don’t have any idea about what I’m doing.”

“I think it’s more exciting,” I told him. “It also explains why you’re flirting was so over the top at the beginning of the semester.”

Hyunjin groaned as if embarrassed by the reminder. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be,” I said, reaching across the console to take his willing hand. “If you were quiet, then we wouldn’t be here right now.”

Hyunjin let out a shaky exhale, studying me for a moment from the corner of his eye. “I want to make a better impression on you, Y/N.”

“Trust me,” I said with a smile. “The impression I already have of you is quite persuasive.”

Hyunjin nodded, and a comfortable silence proceeded before he fumbled with the buttons on the radio to allow some music to accompany the remainder of our drive together. It was something techno and upbeat - the kind of thing that just made sense to me because I knew that he was a dance teacher. But in any case, I only really started to pay attention when I noticed that we had somehow entered the more upscale part of the city. 

Maybe Hyunjin was really doing his best to impress me.

“Here we are,” Hyunjin said, pulling into a parking spot lining the side of a very familiar building.

I realized immediately that it was the opera house which meant that the Hwang Hyunjin had brought me to a pretentious affair that certainly held no appeal to someone like myself. But I tried to keep my smile, nodding at him while he handed our tickets over to the attendant. Meanwhile, at the back of my head, all I could think about was the fact that Hyunjin might’ve been trying too hard with our first date. Especially as I observed the expensive theater.

“I heard it’s a classic,” Hyunjin whispered to me after we found our seats in the middle of the enormous crowd.

“Great,” I murmured back, trying not to feel so out of place.

Instead, I focused on the show in front of me, clapping along with everyone else because I had no idea when it was actually appropriate to do so. In fact, I was forced to laugh even though I couldn’t figure out what was funny, and I shifted uncomfortably when the older gentleman next to me started crying during one of the scenes. Apparently, the gathered crowd of patrons had rehearsed all of this before attending the show, and I was left pretending to understand the social cues that the others had already memorized.

It was actually rather draining, and I forced a smile at Hyunjin when he looked down at me. “You’re not having fun,” Hyunjin finally said during intermission.

“What do you mean?” I asked, but I wasn’t nearly as convincing of an actress as the people on stage.

Hyunjin sighed. “Honestly, Y/N, do you even like this?”

I swallowed hard, struggling under the scrutiny of his gaze. “It’s...alright?”

Hyunjin grinned, but it didn’t seem genuine. “Come on,” he said, rising from his seat. “I don’t think we’ll be missing out by leaving early.”

I reluctantly took Hyunjin’s outstretched hand, allowing him to pull me down the aisle before we trudged through the crowded lobby and into the refreshing night air. The parking lot was still full of cars, and Hyunjin had parked us somewhere near the back since we weren’t aware of the necessity of arriving to these shows several hours before start time. But I didn’t mind the walk because I was trying to think of something to say to a downtrodden Hyunjin who paused next to his car.

“Look,” I finally said with an endeared smile. “You don’t have to try so hard to impress me.”

“I screwed everything up,” Hyunjin said, and I was sad to see that he was genuinely upset as he leaned against the side of his car.

“No, you didn’t, Hyunjin,” I tried to tell him, but he wasn’t having any of it.

“I really like you,” Hyunjin said. “And this felt like my one opportunity to get something right, but I fucked up again.”

I took a deep breath, tilting my head to catch Hyunjin off-guard as I brushed a soft kiss across his lips. “I can tell you have a good heart, and that’s all I care about, okay?”

Hyunjin seemed completely taken aback, and I was worried that I had sent him into some kind of shock, but he allowed one hand to wrap around my waist as he brought us closer. “Thank you, Y/N,” he said, and our second kiss was reciprocated by both sides - a tender exchange of out deepest feelings. “Does this mean that I might get a chance at another date?” he asked, looking at me with sincere brown eyes.

“I think you’re worth it,” I told him despite how cheesy it sounded inside my head.

“This makes us official, right?” Hyunjin asked, and I should’ve known better than to expect something normal with him. Doing things by the book with all the cliches involved didn’t really seem like Hyunjin’s kind of thing - and I liked him even more because of it.

“Yeah, if you want labels or whatever,” I grumbled, but his teasing laugh was the best kind of medicine. Needless to say, our first night together was perfect in every way.

[aswallowssong]

Whumptober (Sickfic) Day 2 - Cough

This is late because I fell asleep on accident last night, and my boyfriend had to wake me up so I could stretch my old lady joints and be able to walk today (I am 23, this should not be a problem.) Enjoy!

It is also based in @themetaphorgirl‘s Patron Saint AU, because that’s a sandbox I LOVE to play in. I’ll probably bounce back and forth between SCRC and Patron Saint for this, because there are too many good prompts. Thanks Caitlin! Love ya!

Read on AO3

TW for vomiting

-----

Alex couldn’t stand the coughing. All winter long it seemed like Hotch had a cough; wet, and deep, and gross. It didn’t matter what she gave him, or how much Vicks she watched him rub on his chest and neck. 

Sometimes it let up, but it was never truly gone, and Mrs. Clark had made more than one concerned remark at the playground that usually circled back to “Why are you here?” and “Why isn’t your mother doing anything about that?” and “Why haven’t you been to the doctor?” To which Alex always answered for him, “I can’t drive” and “She is, it’s fine” and “He has, he’s good to go,” and while lying to Mrs. Clark always weighed on her conscience, they were way too deep to change anything about their charade.

But she hated the coughing fits, and she hated the one-off coughing more.

The one-off coughing set them all on edge. Alex had figured out pretty quickly that when in combination with several other factors, the one-off coughing did not bode well for Hotch, for her, or for anyone in the vicinity. 

Because the one-off coughing, when in sets of three, always meant that Hotch was sick, and that Hotch was for sure going to throw up. Like, right then. 

She’d started counting them after it happened a second time, and with at least four instances under their belt, she was pretty sure she could handle it accordingly.

They were sitting in the library, with Spencer curled against Alex’s side on the couch, both of them reading out of the same book. Emily and Hotch were both staring at their math textbook, and Dave and James were on the other side of the table pouring over an English essay James had sworn was cruel and unusual punishment.

Penelope and Derek were flicking rubber bands back and forth while JJ kept score, the goal being to hit the other person in the forehead. Derek had complained that Penelope had an advantage, because her glasses would protect her eyes from any errant shots. 

The girls had vetoed his concern, and for once, things were relatively calm.

Cough. 

Alex’s head snapped up from her book, eyes locking on the back of Hotch’s head. She shifted slightly on the couch, untucking her legs.

“What’s wrong?” Spencer whispered, his eyes looking over to where her’s had settled. 

Alex sighed very quietly, shaking her head. “Nothing. At least, nothing yet.”

“Who coughed?” He asked, sitting up a little straighter, but his eyes were still searching in the big kids’ direction. 

“Hotch,” Alex said after taking a breath. 

Spencer sat up straighter. “But just one?” Alex hummed quietly. “Just one.”

They were quiet for a moment before Spencer relaxed slightly, pushing back against Alex’s side. “That’s not good,” he said simply, and all Alex could do was nod along with him.

“No, it is not.” She narrowed her eyes slightly as she watched Hotch shift in his chair and rub at his ear, as if it was bothering him. Like he did when he didn’t feel well.

It was almost half an hour before she heard it again. 

Cough.

She sat up straight, Spencer whining when his head popped against the couch. 

“Ow, Alex,” he said, rubbing at the spot where the couch absolutely did not hurt him, his lips tugging into a pout.

Penelope, JJ, and Derek had moved on to folding paper fortune tellers, and James had given up his essay at least five minutes beforehand. 

“Shhh,” Alex said quietly, “Hold on, darling.”

Hotch was rubbing at his ear again, one arm crossed over the front of him as if he was cold. And it was cold, she’d give him that, but not enough to justify him curling in on himself like that? When she knew he had a sweater on under his hoodie?

Not quite.

Cough.

"Two," she said under her breath, and Spencer’s eyes widened. “I’ll make Dave and Emily take me and Derek and Penelope to the Honeybean.”

Alex felt her eyebrows coming together, but she didn’t look down at him. Her eyes were locked on Hotch. “How are you going to do that?”

“Because I’m going to tell Emily it’s time for my four p.m. coffee.”

Alex glanced at the clock on the wall before saying quietly, “It’s almost seven.”

“I know,” he said, shimmying down the cushion and hopping to the floor. He flashed her a smirk. “It’s a code.”

Alex looked at him for a moment before she flashed him a very small smile, “Well, then, you better go quickly.”

He bounded over to Emily, tugging on her sleeve and whispering in her ear. Emily’s posture stiffened, flipping her notebook closed and looking at Dave with wide eyes. 

“Hey, let’s take a coffee time field trip.”

Dave closed his laptop, calling over to Penelope, Derek, and JJ.”

“Hey, lovebirds, I need some caffeine, who’s with me?”

All three of them looked up, and Alex watched as recognition flashed through their eyes. Penelope and Derek grabbed their things, but JJ stayed exactly where she was. 

“I’m good, thanks.”

“Hotch? James?”

Hotch shook his head quickly before he started to rub at his eyes, and Alex watched as Emily, Derek, Penelope, and Spencer followed Dave like baby ducks out of their section of the library with silent efficiency. 

She realized that they must have talked about it. Created a code that wouldn’t be suspicious, and would give her the space and people she needed to deal with a Hotch style , one-off cough breakdown.

Cough.

Alex set her book on the couch and stood up, walking over to Hotch and putting a hand on his shoulder.

“Okay, come on.”

“Come on where?” he mumbled quietly, not looking up at her. His eyes were locked on the math book in front of him, but he wasn’t holding his pencil anymore. 

Alex sank down into Emily’s chair, knowing she didn’t have a lot of time. “You clearly don’t feel well. You’re doing that thing. Come on.”

“I’m not. This is due tomorrow, Alex, go away.”

She rolled her eyes, listening to the shifting of JJ behind her and feeling James’s eyes on her from the next seat over. He’d pulled his things off the table and was already packing up.

“Not a chance, Bubba.”

“I’m fi-” 

She grabbed at his thin wrists and pulled him up out of his seat before he could finish. The color left in his face drained like a faucet, and he blinked hard before he took a shuddering breath.

“Um, Alex, I’m-”

“Going to throw up. I know. Come on.”

She walked quickly away from the table, pulling him behind her and calling, “Jayje!”

“I’ve got it!” The younger girl called, having already moved towards the table to pack up Hotch’s things while James went to grab Alex’s. It’s exactly what they’d done the last time. 

Alex pulled Hotch into her office with practiced ease, moving fluidly to shut the door and push him into her desk chair. 

“Alex!” Hotch said, his voice pitching with urgency.

“I know,” she said. She was forcing herself to stay calm. Stay even. Even though everything in his brain was screaming at her to leave the room and let him handle it.

Instead, she grabbed the trash can from beside her desk and set it in his lap, wincing when he threw up, loudly, into the bin. A year prior, she probably would have thrown up herself. Hotch had to be the loudest puker she knew, and she always felt her own stomach flip in discomfort just being in the vicinity. 

But it wasn’t a year prior, and between both her “brothers’” having the constitution of wet paper, she would have been incredibly disenchanted to admit that it didn’t bother her as much as it used it. So, instead of leaving and having him just come get her when he was done, she stood behind him and gently rubbed her palm between his shoulder blades.

“You’re okay, Bubba. I’m right here.”

It was a few minutes before he’d calmed down enough to ask, “How did you know?” His face was still hanging over the trash can, knuckles white with his grip on the sides. 

Alex let out a quiet laugh, palm still rubbing in a steady rhythm. “You did the coughing thing,” she said quietly. “Not like you’ve been coughing since Halloween. The weird one-off coughing. If you do it three times too close together, you always throw up. Especially when you rub at your ears and look like a ghost.”

He took a breath, clearing his throat before saying, “I didn’t know.”

“We’ve done this like, five times now.”

“I didn’t know I did that. I don’t-” he swallowed thickly. “I didn’t feel any different than I feel all the time.”

Alex thought about that for a moment before frowning and saying, “How do you feel now?”

“Really nauseous,” he said, and she nodded. “Well, when you’re ready, we’ll get you to bed.”

“My stuff-”

“Jayje got it. James has mine,” she assured him quickly. She pushed his bangs back from his forehead, not flinching at the fact that they were damp with sweat. Other people thought they were twins, she hadn’t realized how much they acted like it until they found themselves caught in positions like that one.

His eyes closed, and he took a steadier breath than before. “Okay… thank you.”

“You don’t have to apologize,” she said quickly, “You’d do it for me.”

“In a heartbeat,” he mumbled. They’d done it for each other plenty of times as the year had gone one, and he knew they’d do it for each other plenty more.

[scotianostra]

The Scottish actress Deborah Kerr was born on September 30th 1921.

Born, Deborah Jane Kerr-Trimmer in Helensburgh. As a child, she studied dance at a drama school in Bristol run by her aunt, the shy, red-haired Scottish girl who found the strings of her tennis racket slashed, artist’s palette and brushes broken, and tubes of paint squeezed dry was bullied often by the boarding school girls in Bristol but she rose above the bullying, winning a scholarship to Ninette de Valois's Sadler's Wells ballet group, with whom she made her London stage début at the age of 17.

Watching the progress of her fellow pupils Margot Fonteyn and Beryl Grey convinced Kerr that she would never be a great ballerina, so she concentrated on developing her acting skills and in 1939 did walk-on roles in several Shakespearean productions at the open-air theatre in Regent's Park. She was spotted there by the powerful film agent John Gliddon, who signed her to a five-year contract.

Combining intelligence with a poetic nature, she starred in two Powell /Pressburger masterpieces while still in her twenties — The Life and Death of Colonel Blimp and Black Narcissus.

She had been attracting attention in Hollywood for some time and she was invited to America to sign a contract with MGM. It was the right move at the right time for Deborah and she made her American debut in 1947 opposite Clark Gable in 'The Hucksters. Both this and her follow-up Hollywood movie If Winter Comes with Walter Pidgeon, started a frustrating period for Deborah when she seemed always to be typecast as a refined, but prim and proper English lady. She played similar parts during the following years in movies such as Edward, My Son in 1949, King Solomon's Mines in 1950 'Quo Vadis' in 1951, and The Prisoner of Zenda in 1952.

In 1953 Deborah was given the role of Karen Holmes, the alcoholic, adulterous wife in From Here to Eternity, which suited her to perfection and which allowed her to cast off her decorous, delicate image forever. She was nominated for the Best Actress Oscar and her kissing scene in the Hawaii surf with military officer Burt Lancaster has become part of Hollywood folklore, and is ranked as the twentieth most romantic scene in The American Film Institute's top 100 list.

She played a similar role of showing the hidden passion beneath romantic love in 'The Proud and Profane' and 'Tea and Sympathy' in 1956 and that same year became a landmark for her with her portrayal of Mrs. Anna in one  of my mum's favourite films, The King and I with Yul Brynner. Her performance was rewarded with another nomination for the Best Actress Oscar and a Golden Globe Award for Best Actress.

Her run of successes continued to the end of the decade. She made memorable performances in An Affair to Remember with Cary Grant in 1957, Separate Tables the following year, and The Sundowners with Robert Mitchum in 1960, for which she received her final Academy Award nomination. The Innocents in 1961 and The Night of the Iguana in 1964 were also successful movies for Deborah and she showed her comic ability with starring roles in The Grass is Greener in 1960 and Marriage on the Rocks' in 1965. She also appeared in glamorous style with David Niven, in the spoof James Bond movie Casino Royale in 1965.Her final movie appearance was in The Arrangement in 1969 which was poorly received, and after which she retired from films. She said she felt either too young or too old for every part she was offered and she was growing 

increasingly disenchanted with the growing levels of overt sex and violence on screen although she did continue her acting career on stage and on television. In 1971 she appeared in The Day After The Fair enjoying considerable success in London and a subsequent worldwide tour. Her appearance in Edward Albee's Seascape in 1975 produced poor reviews and the play only ran for one month but she had great success in 1977 with appearances in Long Day's Journey Into Night and Candida.

Deborah's first film made specifically for television was Three Roads To Rome in 1962, and she thereafter worked regularly in TV productions remaining active until the mid 1980's. In 1982 she played the role of Nurse Plimsoll in Witness For The Prosecution and later successes included A Woman Of Substance in 1983. She also defied ill-health and made a one-off return to movies playing a widow in The Assam Garden 1985. After appearing in the television movie Hold The Dream in 1986, she retired completely from acting.

Deborah's personal life was lively and her personality was completely different to the repressed, strait-laced person she so often had to portray. She is believed to have had affairs with several of her leading men including Burt Lancaster, Stewart Granger as well as director, Michael Powell.

She married twice, firstly in 1945 to RAF fighter pilot Anthony Bartley, the marriage producing two daughters before ending in divorce in 1959. In 1960 she married author Peter Viertel, living with him on a large estate in the fashionable Alpine resort of Klosters, Switzerland. She also had a villa in Marbella, Southern Spain.

It was confirmed in 2001 that Deborah was suffering with Parkinson's disease and had been confined to a wheelchair.

Deborah Kerr died on October 16, 2007 in Suffolk, England, aged 86

[tcm]

Team Leslie Howard By Susan King

Leslie Howard has gotten a bad rap over the decades. Ironically, it’s because of his most famous role as Ashley Wilkes, who is obsessed with and weakly indecisive over Scarlett O’Hara, and married to his sweet distant cousin Melanie in the Oscar-winning Civil War epic GONE WITH THE WIND (’39). In fact, when I first saw the film at 13 during one of the epic’s reissues, I said “ewww” when I first saw Howard on screen. The British actor was far too old for the part and seemed to be caked in make-up to look younger. And in fact, he was old enough to be the father of Olivia de Havilland, who played Melanie. I kept shaking my head when my mother told me Howard was quite the matinee idol in the 1930s.

He also seemed disinterested in the role. The performance isn’t awful, but he just seemed to be going through the motions. Truth be told, he didn’t want to be in the movie. He even wrote to his daughter: “I hate the damn part. I’m not nearly beautiful or young enough for Ashley, and it makes me sick being fixed up to look attractive.” Howard further said of the movie: “Terrible lot of nonsense. Heaven help me if I ever read the book.”

Then what was the reason he did the movie? Because GONE WITH THE WIND producer, David O. Selznick, gave him an associate producer credit on INTERMEZZO (’39), the romantic melodrama based on the 1936 Swedish hit. INTERMEZZO also marked the Hollywood debut of Ingrid Bergman, who had starred in the original.

Considering I was so unimpressed with Howard as a young teen, I have been a member of Team Leslie since the 1970s. (I can almost forgive him for playing Romeo at the age of 43 in MGM’s ROMEO AND JULIET, ’36.) Though his acting style is of its time, I love his romanticism and his glorious voice. I feel the same way about Ronald Colman, who, like Howard, excelled at suffering from the slings and arrows of love.

Though he made some silent shorts, Howard’s major movie career only lasted 13 years from 1930 to his tragic death in 1943 at the age of 50, when the commercial plane in which he was traveling was shot down by the Nazis. Growing up, Howard’s films were rarely shown on television. Thankfully, TCM and Warner Archive has changed all of that. He was so much more than Ashley Wilkes. Besides being a star on stage and screen, he changed the career of Humphrey Bogart, earned two best actor Oscar nominations and also directed and produced films.

Howard’s career was bookended by the World Wars. Howard, who was of Hungarian/German Jewish heritage, suffered from shyness growing up in a Forest Hill London neighborhood. And, this sensitive young man experienced shell shock during his World War I service. Acting was prescribed as a cure. The debonair, gentlemanly Howard quickly became a star on the London stage and made his Broadway debut in 1920 in Just Suppose. For the next 17 years, he would appear on the Broadway stage often not only starring in plays, but producing, writing and directing.

And he made his Hollywood film debut in one of his Broadway hits, OUTWARD BOUND (’30). With arrival of the talkies, Hollywood look to Broadway and the London stage for talent who, unlike numerous film stars, had had trained voices and could handle dialogue. He earned his first Oscar nomination for the film version of another Broadway vehicle BERKLEY SQUARE (’33). For years, the uber-romantic time-traveling fantasy was unavailable to be seen. I actually bought a bootleg DVD off of eBay, but the print was so bad it was unwatchable.

A few years ago, TCM aired a beautiful print. All I can say, it was worth the wait. It is stagey and creaky, but I just loved it and so will you if you have a romantic bone in your body. The lavish Alexander Korda production of THE SCARLET PIMPERNEL (’35) was the movie that changed my opinion of Howard. I watched it late at night in a horrible TV print that was riddled with commercials. But I was gob smacked. Howard seemed to be having a field day as a foppish British aristocrat, Sir Percy Blakeney, who is actually the brave and dashing Scarlett Pimpernel, a mysterious man who rescues French nobility from losing their heads during the Reign of Terror.

The actor returned to Broadway in 1935 in Robert Sherwood’s drama The Petrified Forest. He also produced the hit play in which he played the epitome of his disillusioned romantic. This time around he’s Alan Squier, a poetic but disenchanted Englishman hitchhiking across the U.S to seek the meaning of life. He ends up finding love and death at a café in the Petrified Forest. The play also starred Humphrey Bogart who electrified audience as “the world-famous killer” Duke Mantee. 

When Warner Bros. planned to have Howard reprise his role in the 1936 film version, Howard insisted that Bogart, who certainly wasn’t a box office name, play Duke or he would quit the film. Bogart’s career was changed because of Howard, who does take a back seat to the actor’s riveting performance. Though they have diverse acting styles, Howard and Bogart’s scenes together still pack a wallop 84 years after its release. The following year, they reunited for STAND-IN (’37), a kicky but rarely seen comedy about Hollywood. And nine years after Howard’s death, Bogart and Lauren Bacall named their daughter Leslie after the late actor.

Howard earned his second best actor Oscar nomination for the delightful British production of George Bernard Shaw’s PYGMALION (’38) as Professor Henry Higgins opposite Oscar-nominated Wendy Hiller as Eliza Doolittle. Howard also directed the film, produced by Gabriel Pascal, with Anthony Asquith.

With England at war with Nazi Germany, Howard left Hollywood and went home to London where he began working for the British war effort. He starred in, produced and directed my favorite film of his PIMPERNEL SMITH (’41), a rip-roaring exciting update of THE SCARLET PIMPERNEL. And it’s hard not to think of Harrison Ford’s Indiana Jones watching the movie. Howard, the self-assured director, gets a wonderful self-assured performance from Howard the actor. And the final line is a real corker. He also starred with David Niven and directed the well-received aerial propaganda drama THE FIRST OF THE FEW (’42), which was renamed SPITFIRE when it opened in the U.S. shortly after his death.

Howard was on a commercial flight from Lisbon, Portugal bound from London on June 1, 1943 when the Luftwaffe shot the plane, which had 16 other passengers and crew, down over the Bay of Biscay. It would have been so interesting to see where Howard’s career would have gone after the war. Would he return to Hollywood? Broadway? Would he had abandoned acting for directing?

Over the years I have talked to some actresses who worked with him. Despite the fact that de Havilland appeared with Howard in the romantic comedy IT’S LOVE I’M AFTER (’37) and GONE WITH THE WIND and did the Lux Radio Theatre version of The Scarlet Pimpernel, she told me she didn’t get to know him well.

Celeste Holm got to know him maybe a little too well. Though Howard was married, it is no secret he had a wandering eye. She was appearing with Howard in the late 1930s in the touring production of Hamlet as a lady in waiting and Ophelia’s understudy. “I was wearing a gorgeous scarlet dress with a gold wimple and train,” she told me during a 1997 Los Angeles Times interview. “After my scene, I immediately exited to the first wing. I could see the show from there.” Howard soon entered the wing. “He took one look at me and before I could say anything, he took me in his arms and kissed me as beautifully as I had ever been kissed before or since. I was totally unprepared. I had only met him the night before.”

The actor was myopic and as soon as he kissed her, Howard realized it was the wrong woman. Holm went to the dressing room. “One of the actresses I was working said, ‘What happened to you? You look like you have seen a ghost.’” The actress started to laugh at the memory. “She said, ‘He was having an affair with the girl in New York who wore your dress. He probably forgot where he was.’”

[archariio]

“Five Years in Hell”

This is a first draft of a potential chapter one. Subject to change. I am looking for any and all feed back if anyone feels so inclined. I’ve never really put my writing out for people to read. Please be honest about your thoughts good, bad or both. And please forgive me for it being messy, it is a first draft after all. I have written up to about chapter 6, so if anyone would like to see more after this I’d love to get some feedback on it :) 

Chapter 1

            Arramiir spent her last three years of life wanting nothing more than to join the Wyvern Riders. And after three years of training off of a swordsman in her home town she felt she was ready to apply.

           “Here,” her teacher handed her a tightly sealed box. “You’ll need a few things.” She placed the heavy bread loaf sized box into her satchel of holding. “When they ask for your admission fee, you give them that box.”

           “Admission fee? How much is it?” She had no intention of putting her mentor out this way.

           He laughed in the deep hardy voice she had come to love hearing. It reminded her of her dad back home. “It’s nothing compared to the amazing woman you are going to become.” He placed a hand on her shoulder and smiled soft and sad. “The road you’re about to go down is paved with difficult choices and even more difficult obstacles.” While he spoke the young woman clad in cheap chain shirt armor looked around the town she had come to love so much. As small as Dorandale was, it had become her home. “when you return…” He trailed off a moment. “If you return here, you won’t be the same person who left. Not by a long shot.” His voice grew a bit louder as he failed to hide the pride he had for his student. “But don’t let that stop you from becoming the greatest adventurer, warrior and protector you can become. I assure you, whoever and whatever you are five years from now, pass or fail, you will have a home here when you return.” Water welled up in his eyes before a few stray tears escaped. He pulled her into a tight hug. “I love you Arra.” He squeezed her tighter. “Please come back safe.”

           She embraced him back just as fervently. This was a big step, and she wasn’t sure she was ready for it. “I love you to Jaryan.”

           After a another half an hour of filling her enchanted satchel that could hold roughly a storerooms worth of things, also a gift and beloved treasure of Jaryan’s family, with enough food to last weeks, her sword, a dagger, some basic survival and climbing gear, a healing draught for emergencies, she didn’t bother asking how much he had spent on the potion, she was sure he’d shrug it off. But she knew they cost almost twenty gold! That was two months of pay for most people. After a few more hugs, she was off.

           The carriage ride to the academy was going to take a couple days, it’s fairly remote. And on the way their she couldn’t believe all the things her mentor had prepared. All of it together must have cost over a hundred gold pieces. He must have been saving to send her to the academy for two years and then some to have that kind of money. Suddenly the extra orders at the forge and all his late nights began to make sense. She felt determined to be worthy of all that work.

           The young sword wielder clutched the bag and her sword, now in its scabbard on her side, tight to herself. “I won’t let all the time and money my teacher spent be a waste.” She squared her shoulders, for herself as the carriage was empty. “I’m going to be a Rider.”

           ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

           When she finally arrived almost two days later, the place was rather underwhelming. It looked to be a notably large manor house inside a fairly wide clearing in the woods. Two beautiful fountains out front, a couple flower beds and a paved walkway. But as nice as it was Arra felt a bit disenchanted. The legends about this place are monumental in scope. She hopped out of the carriage and grabbed her bag.

           “What’s the matter?” A girl who looked to be a couple years younger than Arra, maybe nineteen or so, made her way over to the new arrival. She wore finely made studded leather armor and had a number or beautiful and ornate daggers adorning her person. “You look confused.”

           Arra ripped her eyes away from the lavish weapons and armor, suddenly feeling a bit self-conscious about her old hard-leather shirt. “I don’t know, I guess I just thought it would be bigger.” She gestured to the small mansion in front of her. She looked back to the girl. “I’m Arramiir by the way, but you can call me Arra if you like.”

           The girl brushed a long strand of jet-black hair behind her ear which was hidden by her cowl and gave Arra the most welcoming smile she’d ever seen. “My names Kyla. It’s nice to meet you.”

           Kyla reached a hand out, and without thinking Arra shook it and smiled. Something in the back of her mind was trying to tell her something, but she couldn’t hear it well enough for it to matter. Before Arra could get her wits about her, Kyla began again. “I’m a third year. I’m here to vet people for enrollment. Me and my party that is.” The unerringly attractive girl looked around a moment, even going as far as to walk over to the carriage and peek inside. “By the way, where is the rest of your party?”

           “Party?” A rush of anxiety slammed into Arras chest. “Um… I…” She couldn’t form words, especially not when she looked into Kyla’s eyes. The same brown as rich chocolate with little green flecks. Stop looking at her like that! Arra chided herself.

           Luckily Kyla interrupted before she had to answer further. “Oh, okay.” She smiled a wicked grin. “So you plan on being a solo adventurer.” The roguish girl’s gaze changed a bit, now examining Arra much closer. Studying her up and down. Her eyes seemed to linger on the chain shirt and the odd handled sword on Arra’s hip. “Very few solo adventures ever make it in. I’m excited to see what you’re made of.” Kyla winked as she walked off to greet other new arrivals. Leaving Arra with her cheeks flushed and her head spinning a bit.

           Arramiir found a shady spot away from all the commotion under a cherry blossom tree. She had a passing thought that cherry blossoms didn’t grow here. And also they shouldn’t be in full bloom. She scratched at the tree. “It’s real.” She murmured to herself in amazement.

            The sun was low in the sky, night would be falling in a couple of hours but Arramiir was far to tired to consider rest. Propping her sword against the tree she sat down and tried to take in some information about her hopefully future classmates. Her teachers words rang in her ears like a calming melody.        No task looks surmountable in the beginning. But information is the most powerful tool to cut it down to size.

           With that in mind, Arra steeled herself and breathed through the anxiety that threatened to turn into a full blown panic attack. She needed to cut this down to size. So she looked out over the crowd of roughly fifty other hopeful applicants.

           Sadly, this proved to be unhelpful. Because all she was learning, was that she was astronomically outmatched.

           Someone eventually came over to ask for her admission fee, and she pulled the box out of her bag and handed it over. The woman collecting the entry fees opened the box, her eyes glowed a moment and began to move incredibly quick as she dug around in the box. “Excellent.” She smiled as she shut the container. “All five thousand gold accounted for. Welcome to the initiate program.” By the time she finished her welcome she had already taken a coin pouch from another student and began the process over again.

           Five thousand gold pieces… Arra slumped back against the tree. Where did my master get that? What did he do to… no. He obviously put a lot more on the line for me then I thought. If I get caught up in that now, his sacrifice won’t be worth it. And having regained her composure Arra pulled out a small black book and made a note to pay the entry fee back as soon as possible. It was listed next to over two dozen other debts she would pay back in the future. One day.

           After a few more hours the remainder of the hopefuls arrived. Some by carriage, two by flying mounts that Arra didn’t recognize and the majority by teleportation circle. The more people who arrived the more self-conscious Arra became about her weapon and gear. 

           Luckily the growing dread got a thousand times worse when the head of the guild arrived. He didn’t arrive to the sound of trumpets or the winds gailing around him. Honestly the young woman wouldn’t have noticed had she not been watching the manor house like a hawk since they arrived. He was a remarkably unremarkable man to the casual observer. Human, mildly handsome features, brown hair and eyes, the picture of average. As he strode out into the middle of the gathering crowd, everyone keeping a respectful distance while he walked, it became clear he wasn’t carrying any obvious weapons or gear. Just a black shirt with polished buttons and the guild insignia. And a black ring on his right hand.

           When he spoke his voice was loud enough to be heard by every student present. Arra suspected it to be a spell. “Welcome everyone!” He sounded so chipper. “As those of you who have been spying on the guild already know,” When he said this a number of faces in the crowd, mostly clad in leather armor hung their heads. “my name is Archariio.” He gave a polite bow. “And I will be your headmaster during your time here.”

           Everyone stood in silence now. The moment they had been training for arrived. Arra felt like a child standing among soldiers and assassins and wizards in this clearing in the middle of nowhere. What was I thinking?

           “So allow me to explain how this is going to go.” The headmaster continued. “There are roughly a thousand of you here today. That many? This is a problem we face every year. Because our facility only accepts thirty potential future guild members per year.” The crowd erupted in shouts and protests.

           “What you mean thirty!” followed by more, “I paid my fee! I’m supposed to be here!” Was the most common complaint. Arra simply kept her back to her tree and tried to process this new information. She would have to be in the top three percent to be admitted. The only thing keeping her from taking this opportunity to leave was the question of how to explain to her master, friends and family why she was back so early.

           Before she was able to give running away to live out her days in the forest to much thought, the headmaster shushed the crowd with a wave, a winning smile and then continued. “So we have devised a very simple method of seeing who among you are the best candidates as quickly as possible. A little mock exam pre-test if you will.” He seemed far to pleased with himself and that made Arra nervous.

           “The rules are simple. I’m going to teleport you all into random places in the forest within a few miles of here at designated starting spots. You will be stuck in place until everyone is in position. As soon as you are freely able to walk off of the starting circle, the game has begun. You have one objective. Get inside the manor before thirty other students do.” He gestured to the building behind him. “Most of you have already arrived with a proper three person party. I will remind you that if a member of your party doesn’t make it in, and place in the first thirty, they will not be admitted with you.” This seemed to unsettle almost everyone present.

           “So it’s a race?” A girl about Arra’s age spoke up. Judging by the robes and wand belt she was a caster. And one look at her slim red tail that matched her crimson skin confirmed she was a teifling. Her horns seemed awfully small though.

           “Exactly!” The headmaster clapped his hands together. Seeming pleased that everyone understood. He turned to leave so the magic teachers and students could begin the teleporting process. But he stopped before entering the door of the manor to turn around and address them once more. “I’m so sorry, I forgot to mention something. My third year students will be hunting you. I asked them to not kill any of you if they can avoid it. But things happen.” He shrugged and turned back around. “I mean, you all know what you signed up for.”

           Arra slung her bag over her shoulder and strapped her sword to the small of her back.

           No. I most certainly didn’t know. She took a breath to bring her senses back to the here and now. But I’ll be getting in there. I didn’t train for three years to be stopped before I’ve even begun.

           A teacher who the young woman hadn’t noticed until now touched her forehead and the smell of magic filled Arra’s nose. The world flashed. Suddenly the silence of the forest and the weight of being alone were the only things keeping Arra company.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

           The young sword fighter took a few deep breaths. The sun was all but down. She guessed they did this on purpose. Third years? We’re being hunted by other students? Why? What was he talking about the possibility of them killing us for? Who is going to tell my master if I die here in the middle of the forest?

Stop! She shouted in her mind. Now wasn’t the time for those questions. She was taught better than this. She reached a hand forward off of the stone cirlcle she was standing on. It looked like a teleportation circle, same as she had seen a thousand times. But something wasn’t right about it. Her hand hit a wall made of nothing. A shield meant to keep them trapped.

           Arra knelt down to examine the rune work. She was no mage, not by a long shot, but she knew draconic, and some of the symbols were pretty close. She ran her finger over the carved stone. The symbol for moon. Or sun? She wasn’t sure. “This is useless.” She mumbled to herself looking through her bag for some other means of escape. The explanation was a bit of a blur. All she really remembered was get to the building before thirty others do. The rest of it she just heard the blood rushing in her ears. “First test is probably escaping this damn thing.” There! She found what she was looking for. She pulled a climbing spike and hammer out of the climbing gear in her kit.

           The spike lined up on the rune just right, she brought the hammer down. There was a crack almost like lightning when the stone cracked. Arcane energy exploded from the plate as the enchantment broke apart. The pulse of energy sent the unsuspecting girl hurtling through the air. In the half a second before she smacked into a tree Arra did what she could to brace for the impact.

           Crack!

           Her head smacked into the wood. Light danced in her eyes, and a loud ringing dug into her mind, preventing her from thinking clearly. The world slowly began to go dark. No… She could physically feel the consciousness leaving her body. The weight of her limbs increasing with each passing moment.

           She was able to process one last thought before the last of the world faded away.

           At least unconscious I’m not enough of a threat to warrant killing.

           Mildly comforted by this thought, she had no choice but to let go, finally allowing her eyes to shut…

[2p-stuff-because-i-miss-them]

2p Germany (General) headcanons

It's the boi,

Our favorite body building schnitzel,

Lutz Belschmidt

We love him so much

Our mans is like the most badass teddy bear you'll ever meet

He's a total beef cake (with cake ;)) but he'll melt at the smallest and most innocent of things

I want to say he worked as a nurse at one point, something went wrong so now he works as a mechanical engineer

That is when he's not working for Luciano

He really likes building cars and motorcycles from scratch, it took him awhile to learn tho damn.

Speaking of motorcycles he was definitely a greaser at some point with Allen-

He had a thing for slicked back hair, leather jackets and girls in poodle skirts haven't we all?

He doesn't drive very well though,

^Luciano: Lutz the speed limit is 40

Lutz: I know

Luciano: then why are you going 90-

His voice is pretty deep and husky at all times, so he's a real ladies man

And a man's man

That being said he sleeps around a lot

Nothing to be ashamed of, and he's really careful about it

He won't go anywhere without a condom bruh, even if you're 100% sure you're clean, hell. no.

Unless he knows you very well

He likes to sometimes stay in contact with one night stands though so you know-

He's a metal head

He's gone to so many concert's

How his ears still work baffles us all

He plays the drums and when he was in a band he was lead vocalist

It was so hot like damn

His voice is very smooth and deep especially when singing so all of his fans' knees would collapse when his voice went like 2 octaves lower in a certain part of a song.

"the confidence in this man is astronomical"

He's always super ready and sure to do and say everything

Like this man is very confident in himself and friends

He knows he has more confidence than the average guy so- 

More HC’s bellow the belt

sorry yalls there was much more to this but it didn’t save T~T

I was saying he knows he has lots of confidence however- he uses that to try to uplift people more than anything

If someones yelling at Lutz then he is no longer listening

He thinks its immature and almost demeaning, but he knows the difference between yelling and speaking with a serious or aggravated tone. and he’ll listen to you for that. 

But if Lutz is yelling at you in genuine anger? Then guess what? r u n. Its terrifying really. He’s a happy go lucky dude and he’s hard to anger. If you’ve angered him to the point that he’s yelling- you’ve been doing something wrong since the beginning- and he will hurt you.

He also could be a pretty good leader but he’s bad commitment and pretty lazy,

This also why he can’t really find a decent relationship to be in, because he or his partner usually date on a whim and he’s open but they both didn’t really think about this. And then they get bored

because of this he’s also gotten a little disenchanted with finding love and kind of has a “love is dead” mindset

but in his heart of hearts he craves to find that special person that’ll sweep him off his feet because he’s a softie

I also talked abt his relationships cause he has a lot of friends within the countries:

His older brother Klaus (or Gilen) is really precious to him. Hes very protective over our albino boi and really appreciates him and looks to him for guidance. they live with each other because Lutz wants to make sure that Klaus is taking care of himself but literally Klaus has been taking care of Lutz the entire time smh

He and Luciano are very close, and they’ve been through thick and thin together really. Even though Luci yells at him a lot he’ll follow him anywhere really. He values Luciano as a leader

Lutz see’s Kuro as more of a little brother that he also looks up too. They’ve also been through a lot but sometimes Lutz knows that he’s too hyper for the smol bean

As for the Allies: Allen is Lutzs’ ride or die. They are Insufferable inseparable at all social gatherings. But everyone knows they both bring the hype so they keep letting them come to parties that’ll eventually get the cops to get involved. They’ve spent lots of Jail time together. And Lutz may have developed an accidental crush on this mans. it kind of just happened on a certain night under a tree. Allen was being EXTRA affectionate and placed his head in Lutzs’ lap. Smiling and shit with that missing canine-. However it never happened anyways so :P

Lutz and 2p Canada (Matt) are kinda weird because they want to be friends but they dont have time to SPEAKETH to each other. I mean Lutz is always with Allen so it makes 0 sense. Matts usually with Allen until he isn’t so.......They definitely vibe but not enough to just call each other and meet up????

Lutz “likes” Zao kinda sorta not really. He’s friends with Zao because Allens friends with Zao. Something happened between these two that wasn’t necessarily negative but very awkward to talk about so-

Lutz and Oliver hang out too much and its kinda wholesome? He calls him to hang and like bake, watch Gordon Ramsey, watch Reality T.V shows (with 2p Romano). Oliver makes Lutzs’ sweaters? And buys him metal band tickets?? Whats going on???

Thats basically it tho, ask if you have questions about any of this~

[wistfulthiinking]

                            starry nights, city lights coming down over me.                                  skyscrapers, stargazers in my head.                                  are we. we are the waiting unknown.                                  this dirty town is burning down in my dreams.                                  lost and found, city bound in my dreams.

how long has your character been in WASHINGTON?

as magic has wound its tendrils around the recesses of his mind, tunny believes that he was born and raised in alexandria, virginia. despite the fifteen minutes of distance, it feels to him as if he’s always lived in the heart of washington. the city is a part of him, it runs through his veins as readily as vital blood. there’s a small piece of him that detests it, an anti-establishment part of his personality that has been poking its head out of dormancy in more recent times following his stint in the army. the young man was quite a rebellious teenager that seemingly reformed in his early twenties when he joined the military. now, after seeing horrible violence firsthand, his faithfulness waivers. 

what is your character’s JOB?

tunny is an active duty corporal in the united states army. though representing the base of army authority, the young man has prided himself on becoming a member of leadership. however, now that he finds himself standing a few months on the other side of his forth deployment to the middle east, his pride is beginning to wane. instead it is replaced with severe ptsd, survivors’ guilt, and genuine sorrow. alcohol and marijuana help when push comes to shove, but tunny remains deeply haunted and uninterested in seeking psychiatric care. 

where has your character been PULLED from in their fandom?

the end of the musical. tunny has been through a complete journey - to the depths of hell and back again to proudly stand beside his two best friends and newfound lover. from a rebellious twentysomething, through his move to the city with johnny that buried him deep in the throes of his bipolar depression. he thought he’d found life’s meaning when he joined the army, only to end up disenchanted and without a left leg. then he met her - a nurse, an angel. with her, life began to make sense once again. rising from the ashes, he returned to jingletown a man slowly becoming complete.

has any MAGIC affected your character?

yes. the only memories tunny has are of a life growing up in virginia, the life he has now. but.. there is that recurring nightmare, it dances across his subconscious and bursts from his chest when he wakes screaming. it never starts badly. he sees three young boys, always cheerful despite the severe dysfunction that awaits them at home. they begin to change as children do, their joy becomes angst as their understanding of the world deepens. then the twin towers fall and they are shaken to their cores -- the post-9/11 world is one of stress and uncertainty. the political world is a mess and the three friends have never been lower. drugs and alcohol coax them from the shadows and they happily give in for some relief -- just a little. deciding that their small town is the problem, tunny departs to the city with johnny. it pains them both to leave will, who is to become a dad, behind. the glimmering lights of the city, tunny soon finds, are nothing but a façade and he falls into his mental illness. then his savior comes in the form of an army recruitment commercial. pulled out of his depression, he enlists. it isn’t sunshine and rainbows -- tunny never expected it to be. all the same, the horrors of battle are more than he could have ever envisioned. his eyes widen as he sees the bomb, a warning scream is born on the tip of his tongue but it is too late. he wakes in the hospital, faces of doctors and nurses blurring as he’s told in rushed voices that the left leg has to go -- now. pain grips him, the depression returns as easily as it had waned when mania took hold. the only thing that gets him through is her. the dream allows him a melodic voice, but no face. he longs to reach out and touch her. thin fingers tremble next to the flesh of a cheek -- she is so close that he can feel the warmth of her skin. then he wakes. 

is there any ADDITIONAL INFORMATION  about your character?

tunny is a big, huge, massive MESS. but he is also a teddy bear who just wants to be held and told it’ll be alright. his backstory is heavy, i know, but hopefully he’ll be as loved here as he is by me. 

also PLEASE let me know if i ever forget to tag triggers as this sweet boy is rife with triggering history and i will fix it asap.

are there any wanted CONNECTIONS?

FRIEND GROUP ( open to m/f/nb ): he needs some people to pal around with. after all, his relationships with will & johnny are pivotal to his character in canon. their friendship can be pure, toxic, anything. just give me friendships ! 

FRIEND(S) WITH BENEFITS ( open to f/nb/m ): i love the drama of a fwb scenario just to see where it goes. this can also be related to the friend group wanted connection as well !

THERAPIST ( open to m/f/nb ): later on in his development, but someone PLEASE get this boy some help. 

AN EXTRAORDINARY GIRL [or boy whatever] ( open to f/nb/m ): ofc this baby needs someone with whom he can fall in love. tunny needs a nurturer, someone who understands the complexity of his bipolar disorder and ptsd. he will give as much as he takes, he is a cupcake.

EXES ( open to f/nb/m ): give me ex-partner drama. i crave it.

CO-WORKERS ( open to f/m/nb ): someone to whom he is close with in the military. everyone needs someone to watch their back.