#also i apologize if these seem out of character people are complex

[quitesins]

Deku’s Type!

Masterlist

Tags: 18+, Sfw-ish, short drabble, fem!reader, aged up! characters, teacher! Deku, kinda vulgar and fucky, im gonna tag misogyny, reader is implied to be “fucked in the head” whatever you want that to mean ^0^!

The boys gather round for drinks and discuss the type of women Deku seems to be fond of, much to his dismay…

“Sounds like Deku’s type,” Katsuki says, smirk in his voice.

Izuku frowns. “I do not have a type.”

Now that makes the table still for a second, not long enough for Izuku to predict the thoughts of his friends, but enough for the rest of the guys to come to the same conclusion.

Katsuki, Denki and Sero are the first to burst out in laughter. Katsuki’s cackle the loudest of them all.

“Are you fuckin’ serious?” Katsuki laughs so hard he doesn’t even care that Denki is half laid over him, “You don’t see that shit?”

“Come on…” Denki says, still slapping Katsuki’s thigh as he laughs, “you have such a type!”

Izuku frowns, sterner, deciding to ignore the immature three and turning to his other friends for support. Both Iida and Shouto look away, their expressions telling.

“I do not have a type,” Izuku reiterates, firmly.

Katsuki shakes his head, finally shoving Denki off him. “All those girls you’ve dated? Exact fuckin’ same.”

Even Tokoyami turns his head, eyes never leaving his drink but a twinkle of unfamiliar mirth evident within them.

“What does that even mean?!” Izuku exasperates, looking around for a single ally.

“It means,” Mineta chimes in, and although Izuku enjoys his company, he already knows he’s about to hear something deplorable, “you like them sick in the head!”

Shouto can’t hold in his sputter, finally contributing to the conversation— with a laugh. The rest of the table is hooting, a few groans at the wording but nothing at the sentiment. All while Izuku looks absolutely scandalised, clutching his chest, eyes wide open.

“That’s horrible!” Izuku cries, so stunned he can’t even trail off into one of his signature rambles in defence, “that’s- that’s. What?!”

“All the girls you’ve liked man…” Sero starts, “they’re not exactly little miss sunshines are they.” He stops, which Izuku almost takes reprieve in until he continues, “you seem to like them a little off putting.”

“Yeah so he can fucking fix them,” Katsuki snorts.

“It’s your saviour complex,” Denki adds, chin tilted up, trying to look profound.

Izuku is quick to interject, waving his hands around. “You’re the pro heroes.” The poor boy tries his best to convince. “We all have saviour complexes!”

“Not like you do, mon chéri,” Aoyama tuts, then winks before saying, “Hero of Japan.”

“Izuku, They do still call you an honorary pro.” Shouto is trying to be nice, Izuku thinks. “And I’m sure your students think the same.”

Izuku grimaces, he knows he’s always had a complex that encompassed so much more than just his dreams to be a hero, but he doesn’t need it sullied by… that.

“Don’t ruminate.” Katsuki presses a drink into Izuku’s hands. “You like women a little fucked up, so what.”

Katsuki’s words do nothing to comfort Izuku, instead it has Denki and Mineta laughing all over again while Kirishima attempts to calm them down. Iida scolds Katsuki a little, doing a half bow in apology to the passing waiter clearly peeved by all the noise. Deku pays no attention, beginning to spiral in his head.

It feels wrong to view you that way. To view the women he’s loved that way. But he’s not an idiot, maybe a little blind at times but now that the proof is there— oh god—

“Listen, Midoriya, I am sure there are many reasons you have loved the women you have.” Iida notices the growing dread upon Izuku’s face. “You also like to save people. There is nothing wrong with that.”

Tokoyami and Shouji nod in agreement, Ojiro giving his own sympathetic smile.

“Yeah bro.” Kirishima raises a fist in camaraderie, though it’s definitely out of pity. “It’s manly to want to care for others.”

“Think he more than cares for ‘em,” Katsuki slickly adds, in an artful voice that Izuku is more that familiar with, “the fucker get off on that shit.”

This time, it’s Shouto who scolds him, Katsuki’s implications clear enough for even him to catch on. They rest of the guys begin to bicker in the background, one half in defence of Izuku’s less than innocent tastes in women, the other intent on making fun of the golden boy for once.

Though the attention is finally off him, it does not help Izuku feel any better.

Because there’s a thought that lingers… it’s a sick thought, a terrible, horrible, awfully honest thought.

Shit, he does like them a bit fucked up.

My truth is i still don’t know how to punctuate dialogue… pleek don’t look and none of dat…

Anyways I kind of wanna elaborate on Deku’s hero complex coming out in other ways in the 8 years of studying and becoming a teacher, like someone has to deal with it…

[evanpetersmybf]

Be mine?

Tate Langdon x female!reader

Summary: Meeting you was his destiny. He had to make you his so he could feel alive... It was meant to be.

Genre: Smut.

Word count: 3,172

Warnings: Virgin and inexperienced reader, mentions of bullying, self-harm (just once and is nothing detailed), obsessive and stalkish behavior, swearing, cunnilingus, fingering, unprotected p in v and cumshot.

A/N: English isn't my first language and this is my first time writing smut, so sorry if it sucks or if I have grammatical mistakes or something TT. Btw, also sorry if Tate's out of character. Anyways, hope you enjoy it!

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ཐི ♡ ཋྀ

Tate had another bad day. It was the usual. Bullying, failed tests, the teacher humiliating him after he couldn’t solve a simple equation on the chalkboard, his mother scolding him. Nothing seemed new, and it seemed that nothing wasn’t going to change at any point.

He needed something, a reason to live, something to make him feel alive. Because he was dead. Dead in life, which in his own opinion, was even worse than being a rotten corpse.

He headed to the music store after secretly stealing some of his mom’s money, just a few bucks; the enough amount to buy a vinyl or some CD’s. Tate was sort of a music elitist, always believing that the artists nowadays just created pure, hollow, and trashy songs. In fact, he didn’t believe those could even be considered music.

Walking around the nearly empty store, rummaging through the shelves filled with Nirvana vinyl’s, someone bumped into him.

“Oh, sorry.” You spoke, after accidentally taking too many steps back and bumping into Tate’s behinds.

He frowned, somewhat annoyed at you for disturbing his moment of peace. The blonde turned around to look at who it was, scanning your body from head to toe, taking note of your appearance. Then, his dark eyes drifted to the sign that was on top the shelf, which indicated the musical genre of the records that were on that rack. Alternative pop. His gaze went to the album you were hugging to yourself.

“Cry Baby? What type of crap is that?”

“Huh, excuse me?”

“Never mind, you won’t understand.” Tate talked in such a volatile and rude manner, already feeling superior because of his likes.

You arched an eyebrow. What was his problem? You did nothing to him and yet he was here, judging your amazing music taste.

“Well, people’s free to like whatever they want to, hmm?”

“Uh, yeah, but what’s the point of that if everything is so generic?”

“Have you ever listened to Melanie Martinez at least once?”

He shook his head no, still scowling, now fidgeting with a ring that was on one of his fingers.

“Have you listened to Nirvana?”

“Just like… Two songs?”

“Don’t tell me. Smells Like Teen Spirit?”

“Guilty.”

Tate rolled his eyes. What was going on with this generation? What happened to good music, to the greatest artists? Why was everyone just listening to trash?

After sharing your names and a few more words, debating about who was right and who wasn’t, you placed one of your hands over his right shoulder, as an attempt to stop his rant of how superior he was. And indeed, it worked. The teen stopped venting and stared at you, all confused and a bit uncomfortable. You noticed it and quickly stepped back, apologizing for touching him without permission. He told you it was okay, that you just surprised him. But deep down, that simple yet complex touch meant a lot to Tate, even if it was absolutely nothing to you.

For the first time he felt something more than sorrow.

“So… What do you think of this? I’ll make you listen to some songs by Melanie and other artists, and I’ll listen to your beloved beautiful grunge music.” You said those last words in a mocking way.

Tate huffed, clearly offended by the way you referred to his taste. Nevertheless, in the end he agreed with you.

After paying the stuff you two picked, both of you went to Tate’s place. As you walked next to him, your fingers brushed his, making his cheeks turn a light shade of red and his heart flutter. He felt dizzy, not sure about what was going on.

In his house, he took you to his room. The boy didn’t want his mother to see you, otherwise she’d be too nosy and probably scare you and push you away from him, and that was the last thing he wanted.

“Get comfy.” He mused, extending his hand as if inviting you to take a seat wherever you feel to.

“Thanks.” You sat on the floor, using one of the sides of the bed as a support for your back. He did the same and sat right next to you.

He was nervous. So damn nervous and excited. He brought a pretty chick to his place. The Tate Langdon, the outcast, the bullied, that Tate Langdon was in the same room with a girl? He couldn’t believe it.

“Ladies first.” Tate pointed the record-player with his thumb, and you obeyed, placing the CD in it. The music started playing.

“We could’ve used Spotify, y’know?”

“Nah, I don’t like it. I prefer the old school.”

‘Cry Baby’ was the first track that was listened to.

He squinted his eyes and rubbed his chin, analyzing the sounds, the melody, the harmony and of course the lyrics.

Although it wasn’t his style, you definitely were. The way you looked, talked, walked. How you stood up for your beliefs and didn’t allow him to step on you (even if you just discussed about music). It was new for him. He craved your independence. He craved you.

That was the very moment when he realized that you were the thing he was looking for all his life. You were the one who was meant to be his, he was meant to be yours. It was destiny. Tate truly believed it was some kind of divine prophecy, and he wasn’t going to let you go.

He was so immersed in his mind that he didn’t pay attention to the song anymore. He was solely focused on you, remembering how warm and kind your touch was, how sweet your voice was. ‘Oh, she’s mine’, he thought.

“So… That was the first track. Its name’s Cry Baby. Did you like it?”

Tate snapped out of it and bit his bottom lip. He didn’t listen to your question.

“I’m sorry, what did you?—”

“Did you like the song?”

“Ah, yeah yeah. It’s quite… Innovative. I’ve never heard something like that.”

You smiled and clapped your hands. “Of course! She’s such a genius. Let’s finish the album, hm?”

He just nodded, as a little smirk appeared on his face.

The days flew by, and Tate asked you out on many friendly dates. Or at least that’s what you thought because you were so oblivious at the fact that he had a fat crush on you.

With every hang out, you noticed that Tate was lonely. Like, really lonely. Maybe that’s why he was so clingy with you.

He told you about his family, about how annoying Constance was, about his siblings and about how his father left him behind. He also mentioned the bullying he suffered and almost talked about the self-harm but stopped himself.

Both of you grew closer, as his obsession.

Since you went to a different school, he would skip class and infiltrate your campus just to see you. He couldn’t stand being away from you. And if he did, his mind was full of you, thinking of you all day, unable to focus on his homework and tests. Tate didn’t care anymore if he failed subjects, as long as you were next to him, he was happy and alive.

The void he once felt, was now fulfilled with your mere presence. You could step on him, and he would thank you. In his twisted little mind, you were free to have everything of him.

He was willing to do anything to keep you by his side. The thought of losing was so terrifying that it would make him throw up.

Tate learned every single detail about you. Your mannerisms, your likes and dislikes, your dreams, and your fears. Everything. And that includes your schedule since you wake up, and since you go to sleep.

That was his definition of love. No one ever taught him about how to express it, and he ended up being the way he was with you.

One day he invited you over to his place. The Langdon's house was empty, and he was going to take advantage of it. No doubt.

“Your mom isn’t home?” You questioned as you followed him behind, going upstairs straight to his bedroom. Little did you know this wasn’t going to be another afternoon of playing board games while listening to some music.

“Nah, dunno where she went but she won’t be back any time soon.” He shrugged and let you inside of his private space,

You went to lay down on bed, feeling relief in your aching back after a long day at school. “Damn, I need some rest!”

Tate chuckled softly and sat on the edge, looking at you as you closed your eyes and tried to relax. He was focused on your steady and calm breathing, on how your breasts went up and down with every inhalation and exhalation. His eyes stared at your lips, at how kissable they looked. He felt a sudden desire, the intense urge to make you his. Feeling conflicted, he shook his head and tried to distract himself, pretending to ignore how aroused he was getting.

He wasn’t going to say it out loud, but of course he already had some wet dreams of you. He imagined you beneath him, your precious body shivering and responding to his touch, to his kisses. Your cunt wet and ready for him, just how he wanted to.

“Y/N…” Tate cooed, unable to hold back any longer.

“Yeah?” You opened one of your eyes and spotted him, sitting on the bed with his fists clenched over his thighs, while his breathing looked kinda rapid. “You ‘kay?”

“No.”

“Uh? What’s wrong?” You reincorporated and sat straight beside his warm figure. Your right hand touched his left, rubbing it up and down with your thumb.

Tate shoved you to the bed, pinning your arms above your head and holding them tight.

His breathing pattern was no longer normal. It was a heavy one.

His dark brown eyes locked with yours. Your orbs were wide, not understanding what the hell was going on. Or maybe you did but were in denial.

“Please. I want you.” He purred, seeing you with puppy eyes, the ones he knew you couldn’t resist.

“Hahah, you funny.”

He let out a frustrated whine, almost begging on his knees for you to get the hint.

“I’m not kidding. Pretty please. I need you.”

“Do you mean…?” You raised your head a few centimeters to look at his crotch in order to confirm your suspicions. Your cheeks had a cute blush as soon as you noticed Tate’s erection restrained by his jeans. It looked painful, and it actually was.

“Yes. I want to. Please, I truly need it. Please, please, please?” His voice was shaky and low, a needy desperate whisper. “Can I?”

This wasn’t what you expected for today. You saw Tate as a best friend, but you couldn’t deny he was handsome… And that he already provoked butterflies in your stomach before.

Hesitantly, you gave a shy nod with your head, giving him consent to continue. “But Tate… I’ve never done this before, I dunno what to do, I—” You trailed off, being cut off mid-sentence when Tate placed his lips over yours. The kiss was slow and tender, not rough at all. Your bottom lip was between his, as he nibbled it with extreme care to not hurt you.

After some seconds, he pulled apart and led his hand towards the side of your face, brushing some hairs away. “Don’t ya worry, princess. Leave it all to me, hm? I’ll be gentle. Unless you don’t want me to.” With that being said, he leaned into your neck, pressing his mouth on your sensitive flesh. He left sweet kisses, making you hum as you melted under him.

His lips continued to tease your skin, leaving some little bites between every kiss, trailing down to your collarbone. Tate stopped there and helped you get rid of your blouse, tossing it aside and continued his journey, this time kissing your sternum while his right hand cupped one of your breasts, kneading it gently over the fabric of your bra. He pulled down the straps and took off the piece of lingerie, setting your tits free.

The cold air hit you and your nipples perked up, looking ravishing and making him desire you even more.

He introduced one of the hardened buds into his warm mouth, sucking it greedily and making lewd wet sounds as he did so. His left rubbed the other nipple in circles, taking it with his thumb and index, pulling it and pinching it.

“Hmph… Huh…” You let out soft whimpers, slightly arching your back meanwhile he abused your breasts.

Tate stopped after some minutes, letting go of your nipple and looking at you, grabbing your chin and tilting your head to the side. He approached your ear and whispered, “You like this?”

“Yes…” You begged. Your voice was already ragged and shaky.

Instinctively, you pressed your thighs together, rubbing them as a pathetic try to feel some relief. Tate realized it and spread your legs with one of his hands. He took his digits right to your clothed pussy, eagerly rubbing the spot where your clit was.

“Someone’s already wet? Cute.” He giggled and took off his striped sweater, throwing it away. He positioned himself between your limbs and pulled down your pants, mesmerized as he saw your damp panties. Tate continued rubbing your bundle of nerves over the fabric of your underwear, still fascinated at how humid you were.

This was the moment he had been waiting for the past weeks. He wasn’t going to need to jerk off to your photos anymore, because now he would be able to jerk off to your tits in person.

Tate removed the last barrier that was stopping him from touching your womanhood directly. He pulled them down to your ankles and you helped him to get rid of it by shaking your feet.

He got closer to your cunt and placed your legs over his shoulder, spreading your folds with two of his large digits, blowing some air at the sensitive meat. Finally, he started sucking on your swollen clitoris, enjoying the feeling of your dampness against his face.

“Mmh…” He moaned, still toying with the nub. You grabbed him by the hair, not thinking about what you were doing. You just let yourself go and pulled him closer to your pussy, wanting to feel more. Your body twitched, unconsciously bucking your hips against his mouth that was currently making slurping sounds.

His attention changed and was now on your slit, teasing just the entrance with his hot tongue, while his nose rubbed against your clit. He lapped your pretty cunt, savoring your juices as if they were a delicacy.

Looking at your adorable face contorting in pleasure, he introduced his ring finger into your wet, tight hole. It was a slow and kind movement because the last thing he wanted was to hurt you. He slipped it deeper, pumping it in and out with care, increasing speed after a few seconds once he saw you comfortable. “Tell me if it hurts…”

“Mhm… It feels nice. Huh…” Your melodic whimpers and moans were just too much for him. He could listen to you for the rest of his days and never get tired of you.

Without further ado, he introduced his middle finger, now finger-fucking you with two. Tate’s thumb was also working wonders on your lil’ bundle of nerves in circular motion.

She was clenching around Tate’s large fingers, that he curled inside of her, hitting the right spot to make you squirm and feel a new and foreign sensation in your lower belly.

“Fuck it, I can’t wait anymore.”

He undid his belt, unzipped his pants and pulled down his boxers, quickly getting rid of them and letting them fall to the wooden floor.

You just stared in awe; it was the first time you saw one in real life.

Tate grabbed his hardened cock and stroked it a few times on top of you, finding amusing your silly reaction. The reddish tip was glistening with pre-cum, which he used as lube. He spat at your pussy and rubbed his slick saliva with two digits, before finally thrusting his dick.

He did it slowly, beginning with the head. Eventually, he pushed his entire length, hitting your cervix and stretching you out for the first time.

“Fuck, you’re so tight!” Even if he was taking the lead, he was a whiny mess, vocal and loud.

He continued pounding into you, his gaze never leaving your face. Tate loved how you rolled your eyes to the back of your head and how your little mouth was letting out such nasty sounds.

The room was filled with slapping and wet sounds, created by his skin slapping against yours, his balls always hitting you with every stab. Again, he placed your legs on his wide shoulders to have a better angle and pump into you deeper than before.

His big veiny hands were roaming all over your body, specifically your breasts. Within minutes, he developed an addiction to them. Probably because of his mommy issues? He grabbed them roughly, tweaking both of your nipples as he fucked you mercilessly.

Tate lolled his head as he felt your hole gripping him tight. Very tight.

He increased the pace and moaned your name, begging you to squeeze him tighter.

“Oh, please, please, please!” The blonde kept whining. He left one of his hands taking care of your nipples, while the other went back to torture your clit. He stroked it in circles, and then up and down, applying the enough amount of pressure to make you beg for more.

“Tate, I feel like I’m—”

“It’s okay, let it go, mhm?”

You couldn’t hold yourself any longer and squirted all over him, coating his lower body with your warm fluids.

“Oh, oh, oh, oh, gonna cum!” Tate pulled out from your cunt and pumped his cock with his hand finishing with a loud moan. His hot sticky white cum coated your breasts and abdomen, creating an incredible sight that he always imagined.

All spent, Tate threw himself next to you on the bed, pulling a blanket to cover both of you as he filled your pretty face in candy pecks.

“Did it hurt? First time usually does.” He looked at you, concerned for your wellbeing. “I was too rough?”

You laughed and shook your head no, caressing his messy locks with your fingers, tenderly scratching his scalp. “Don’t worry, I’m fine, really.”

Tate smiled at you and kissed you on the lips, “You’re so pretty, Y/N.”

You hugged him from behind, him being the little spoon this time. Your mind was going wild; you were still processing what happened and was about to drift to sleep when he whispered.

“Y/N…?”

“Mh, what is it, Tate?”

“I love you… Please be mine?”

[shorthaltsjester]

seeing people use the various pinterest “pain that just made this person kind” quotes about laudna over the past few months truly grind my gears. like. textually no actually all that pain has irrevocably changed laudna in ways that are not kind, has changed her ways that means she dehumanizes herself, views herself as a dead end unworthy/incapable of having a life let alone a happy ending, and she can be calculated and cruel like. it is true that she is playful, but (and this is a theme across all fandoms about women in fiction honestly but especially in cr fandom) the reason her kindness is resonant is because we see that it’s not the only option that she’s resorted to out of her own pain, in fact it’s probably the hardest option faced with the trauma that she has. like the reason the moment in whitestone when she apologizes to percy because she recognizes they are both in pain from the same source, to me that’s as resonant as it is because up until the moment she made that choice to be kind, it seemed equally possible that she would lash out because of the different places they currently are in and that her pain still takes up such a huge role in her life.

this is probably a bigger issue i have with the notion of pain making people kind as if it the people in question have no choice but especially in cases like laudna where currently we’re seeing exactly how unkind her pain can make her — not in a Shes Evil way but just in a. it isn’t actually kind at all to hate yourself even if it makes you docile or willing to bend yourself to the plans of (even well intentioned) others. like, it wasn’t actually the years of solitude and delilah manipulation that made laudna kind, and in fact i’d argue that textually we’ve only seen proof that those years have made it harder for laudna to be kind in a way she might’ve been when she was still matilda; i think particularly of her attitude with children that would be taken more kindly from someone more alive and someone less literally haunting. that also shines in the whitestone exchange with percy, because it’s the recognition that underneath the cold and calculating city leader and the haunting witch come back from the dead again, they’re just two kids who had the unfortunate fate of having been targets for delilah briarwood, as different as the reasons for that were, they still both have to live with the pain, and they both likely would’ve been much kinder people if they didn’t have to.

kindness is a social skill that requires both practice/maintenance and awareness of those who you direct it at, neither of which are particular strengths of someone who has spent 30 years alone with her own voice mediated through a rat puppet or her patron’s in her head. and i do think it’s important for recognize that laudna tries to be kind, but i think the tragedy of her story and the complexity of her character is harshly undersold if you look at her and just ascribe her to the “all that pain and it just made her kind.” it makes the most interesting parts of laudna flat and static and worst of all, agencyless.

[bookwormangie]

Defending Lily

As someone involved in the Snape fandom, I’m frustrated by the unfair criticism Lily receives. It’s disheartening to see so much disdain directed at her character, especially when many of these judgments overlook the complexities of her situation. Despite being a minor character in the books, Lily is often misunderstood and unfairly vilified, and as a Snape fan, I feel compelled to defend her. Lily deserves a fairer assessment that considers her full context, rather than being unfairly vilified.

Lily ending her friendship with Snape

Lily was fully justified in ending her friendship with Severus after he called her a slur. Although Snape was being bullied and humiliated at that moment, such a hurtful term doesn't slip out easily—it was already part of his vocabulary. He used and associated it with Muggleborns in general among his Slytherin friends, as Lily pointed out when he attempted to apologize.

““…But you call everyone of my birth Mudblood, Severus. Why should I be any different?””

It's important to note that the slur wasn't the sole reason for the end of their friendship. Their relationship had been strained for some time. Snape had long been involved with a gang of Slytherins who aspired to join Voldemort and were deeply involved with the Dark Arts. Given that Lily, his best friend and a Muggleborn, was part of the very group his associates aimed to terrorize, his affiliations were deeply troubling. Despite Lily’s efforts to distance him from his dark associations with Mulciber and Avery, Snape remained entrenched in his choices. She had been excusing his behavior for years because she cared about him deeply and did not want their friendship to end. However, everyone has their breaking point. When he called her a Mudblood, it was the final straw. She could no longer overlook his behavior or excuse it.

“It’s too late. I’ve made excuses for you for years.”

And:

“I can’t pretend anymore. You’ve chosen your way, I’ve chosen mine.”

Ending the friendship was a painful but necessary decision. It's unfair to expect Lily to bear the burden of continuously trying to "save" Snape when he was unwilling to change his ways. Despite her attempts to guide him and communicate her concerns, his own choices ultimately drove them apart.

The "Smile" During SWM

Another point of contention is the exaggerated focus on Lily’s supposed 'smile' during Snape’s bullying. It wasn’t a smile—it was a very brief twitch of her expression. When James flipped Snape upside down, Lily’s expression twitched momentarily before she continued to defend him. Some people are really blowing this out of proportion.

““Lily, whose furious expression had twitched for an instant as though she was going to smile, said, “Let him down!””

From my perspective, her reaction seems to be an involuntary response to the sudden shock of seeing Snape's underwear. It's not uncommon to smile or refrain from smiling at inappropriate times due to shock or unexpectedness. Alternatively, it could be seen as an indicator of a shift in her and Snape’s relationship, considering their strained friendship. However, Lily's subsequent actions—defending Snape and admonishing James—demonstrate her clear disdain for bullying. Furthermore, the assumption that Snape called her "Mudblood" because of her reaction is also unlikely; Snape was too preoccupied with his own humiliation to notice a fleeting twitch. Harry, observing his parents closely, might have been the only one to catch it.

Criticizing Lily for this brief, involuntary reaction and portraying her as evil is deeply unfair. It shows that she is a flawed human being like the rest of the characters.

Lily's Stance Against Bullying

Another argument I’ve heard is that Lily didn’t defend Snape from the Marauders' bullying at all or does a half-assed job. While our information is limited, we do see her stand up to James when he and Sirius insult Snape on the train to Hogwarts in their first year. Before that, when Petunia called her a freak, Lily stood her ground and told her sister it wasn’t a nice thing to say.

"“Lily sat up, rather flushed, and looked from James to Sirius in dislike. “Come on, Severus, let’s find another compartment.””

And:

“—you think I want to be a–a freak?” Lily’s eyes filled with tears as Petunia succeeded in tugging her hand away. “I’m not a freak,” said Lily. “That’s a horrible thing to say.”

Lily is depicted as a person who stands against injustice and bullying. She consistently demonstrates moral courage and empathy, defending those who are mistreated, even when it involves confronting her peers or family members. Her actions reveal a strong sense of fairness and a willingness to speak up for what is right, showcasing her integrity and compassion. Given this, it's likely she defended her best friend on numerous other occasions. Additionally, Snape probably kept most of the bullying incidents a secret from her, viewing it as humiliating. Even Sirius noted that Lily wasn’t aware that James continued to hex Snape in their seventh year. This suggests that it’s not far-fetched to assume Snape may have kept much of the bullying from her.

Lily's Marriage to James

At last, I understand why some might feel uneasy about Lily marrying James Potter, given his history as a bully toward Snape. It's completely reasonable to feel conflicted, as reconciling her choice with her past can seem challenging. However, it's important to note that by the time Lily had gotten with James, she and Snape hadn't been in touch for about two years. Their friendship had ended, and she was no longer involved in his life. This doesn’t mean she was dismissing her past with Snape; rather, she had moved on from that chapter of her life. As I mentioned earlier, Lily likely wasn’t fully aware of the extent of Snape's bullying. Additionally, she saw qualities in James that indicated he had matured to a point she could accept. Lily is not a grudge holder; she is a forgiving person who is willing to give second chances when she perceives change, which she probably saw in James.

All of this doesn’t diminish Snape’s suffering or the challenges he faced, but it highlights the complex realities of both their situations. It’s crucial to consider Lily’s perspective and avoid unfairly condemning her. She shouldn’t be demonized; her actions reflect her own limitations and struggles. Just like all the characters in the series, Lily was flawed and real. Recognizing this can help us move past the simplistic view of her as bad person and appreciate her as a multidimensional character who, like everyone, had her own battles and growth.

[i-am-mldy]

People (team green/aemond defenders mostly) seem to conveniently forget Aemond was gonna bash Jace's head in with a rock if Luke hadn't slashed his eye.

"Luke never apologized" why the fuck would he? The alternative was he did nothing and Jace died.

Aemond is allowed to be angry and hate them for it. It's not like he started the fight. He isn't obligated to forgive any of them. Luke isn't blameless or faultless. But it was still a fight. Should Luke have faced punishment? Maybe. But you know who else weren't punished in the show for their crimes? Criston Cole. Aegon. Need I explain what they did?

Also, Team Green got their blood. Rhaenyra's. When Alicent cut her. The heir to the fucking throne. Using a Targaryen ancestral dagger. Was she punished?

Well? Was she?

At the end of the day, Aemond got what he wanted. An eye for a dragon. Only, he doesn't know how to fucking control that dragon and started a war cus of it.

It just rubs me the wrong way when certain people interpret Luke's death as some kind of righteous justice when really Aemond just fucked around and found out. In doing so, he doomed his family. Both sides took tremendous loss at the end of it the Dance, but who ended up actually being king? Whose bloodline is completely erased now because of the war?

And if we really wanted to go there, who really spearheaded all the bullying he endured? Which led him to claim Vhagar?

Clue: it's his rapist of a brother (who's a fan favorite now apparently just cus he became a people pleaser)

This is not Aemond hate. I actually love his character and all his complexity (and Ewan Mitchell is hot). It's just how some fans treat his character as someone to baby and excuse at every turn. It's just annoying.

[poppinspops]

Bonds were made to be broken.

Part 1 Part 2

Your complex relationship with aemond and how it changed grew and dissipated.

ooc characters as I haven't written really for aemond at all so.. this was hell but fun at the same time

Fem reader, sorry, it just works better for me and the story

Warnings: Of course, there are no spelling checks yet, ooc aemond, violence, cursing? Not really, but still, but also unreliable perspective reader(you)

You and aemond met when you were just children

Aemond was rather shy, or so you thought when he came over for the first time with his older brother aegon as aegon was so loud and eccentric and aemond was just.. not.

Though he seemed so lonely, and you made it your personal mission to make him feel welcomed and just to keep him company

The more you attempted to talk to the boy, the more you realized how truly lonely he was. His older brother was bullying him, and so were your brothers' lucerys and jacaerys

You would laugh sometimes, but you did try to stop as he'd give you such a heartbroken look.. and you felt a bit guilty.

You two did get along, though, since you two had such a large age gap, you didn't quite understand what he was saying sometimes

But you knew that you were the older boys' only friend and that he wanted a dragon and was a bit upset that you also had one

You thought of him like an older cool brother, much like your older brother jacaerys

Anything aemond would do you would be in awe of and aemond ate up every bit of your attention and praise

He'd never been given this treatment, so just being aemonds number 1 supporter did boost his confidence and ego by a bit

But of course, it never stayed long enough as aegon would be a bit of a dick and tease him

with stuff along the lines of 'aww your only friends a little girl' things like that

That was the main reason for your relationship with aemond being rocky in the first place, plus the attitude he'd get sometimes would piss you off to no end

Though you held a great deal of sadness for your uncle aemond as his older brother was a prick, he was funny at times, but he'd take things too far

As a child, you actually thought aegon was pretty great. Besides the whole bullying his brother part, he was pretty cool in your book

So was their sister, helaena

You thought she was pretty weird, and you weren't a big fan of the spiders or snakes, BUT you did love the smaller bugs like ladybugs, butterflies, and ants

And she was another girl so it was refreshing to hang out with a person who wasn't a nasty and annoying boy

Though you wished she spoke more

But of course, not everything could stay the same as one day a big fight happened.

You were with a maid upstairs as you wanted to show off your new dresses that alicent had gifted you that morning it was mainly green dresses

You did always adore the color green.

You weren't there for the fight or aegon gaining a dragon

Or aegon losing his eye to your older brother lucerys.

But you where there for the aftermath.

You were by your brothers covering your ears as alicent screamed, jacaerys holding you and luce as you stared at aemond with wide eyes

His eyes were.. gone, he had a huge slash across his eyes from the bottom of his cheekbone to his eyebrow from the looks of it from where you stood

His now one eye stared at you as he did a little motion for you to come over to him, but all you did was gasph at his eye closing yours as you looked away

You couldn't remember anything after that. All you could remember was your little brother apologizing, people screaming and aemonds stare that made you look away

After that day you hadn't seen aemond again except for events but you tried to ignore him

But of course, you still felt bad. You hadn't been told the whole story at all left. I'm the dark and feeling bad about aemond

You and aemond would talk here and there at dinners

You held no bad blood with the boy, and you hoped he didn't for you either since you two seemed to have alright conversations before your oldest brother would sweep you up and take you away from your uncle

A few times visery your grandfather had offered your hand to aemond his son.

He hadn't outrightly said it in front of you, but he'd talked to Rhaenyra and alicent about it, pleading that it would heal the bond between the two but your mother almost immediately shut it down as did alicent, though alicent was fond of you

You were aemonds only 'friend' when he was little and you did nothing bit complement alicent on her hair even with you being a bastard she didn't really hold ill will to you

But Rhaenyra wouldn't budge she had put her foot down on you being married off at such a young age but mainly being married to aemond

The reason for the marriage being brought up again was because visery caught you two talking once again. You seemed to be showing off how many fruits you could shove in your own mouth. You two got along greatly, and visery thought that this would be a match made in heaven that if he got those two betrothed that everyone would stop fighting and everyone would be good with one another

But in reality, you had just been shoving food into your mouth, and aemond came over, and visery looked over at the wrong time and misunderstood what was happening but he wasn't far off with you two not seeming to mind each other too badly

Aemond seemed intrigued and watched as you did. Maybe he was wishing you choked and died, or maybe your uncle was amazed

You didn't know, but you did choke in the end, and that gained you a smirk from aemond that made you slightly uncomfortable

-----------------------------------------------------

You stood by the food table as usual, eating as much as your own body weight. You had always been a foodie

You hadn't noticed aemond stride over to you, and by the time he made it over to you, you had successfully had six strawberries in your mouth giggling to yourself until you heard a throat clear behind you making you jump, turning around slowly

You had to look up at the figure to see them. You saw the eyepatch and immediately knew who was in front of you looming over your form menacingly.. it was your uncle aemond.

You smiled a bit or at least tried to with the six cut-up strawberries in your mouth that made aemond smirk a bit as he spoke staring at you with his one eye "so.. what are you doing niece?"

You only stared at him before speaking. "Eating strawberries..?" you replied as you started chewing and swallowing the strawberries as aemond let out a chuckle at his niece and her rather odd way of eating strawberries.

-----------------------------------------------------

You hadn't known about visery trying to marry you off to your uncle aemond as Rhaenyra tried not to get you involved in any of that

She just wanted you to stay.. you

Independent, not thinking of marriage or anything just being a child, her daughter.

Aemond wasn't opposed to marrying his niece, though she was always with her brothers, causing him to bot have time to talk to her at all.

The whole family had dinner, everyone sitting together as videry spoke aemond had his eye on you making your skin crawl as you'd awkwardly smile at the one-eyed boy from across the table

It wasn't that you didn't like aemond he was good company for the short time you had been around him

It was just that you were just a bit awkward around people you didn't know quite well... or it was just around aemond.

Maybe it was just around aemond.

The events after that dinner made your head hurt as your brothers were beat up by your two uncles, and you left almost untouched as aegon did stare at you, but aemond gave aegon a look making him groan and look away from you leaving you confused but angry

You may have attacked aegon with a cup that held your drink in it as you wanted him to let go of your brother lucerys, making him groan and hold his head as you dragged your brother away from him as you screamed curses and called him a whore and a drunkard.. and then threw a plate.

The rest was a blur. All you remember doing was patching up your brothers and being drenched in someone's drink and a bit of blood from the glass plate you threw that missed aegon but shattered on the table cutting you.

Aemond watched with a smirk on his face that only grew at your boldness and readiness to fight aegon, but it faltered as his mother gave him a look.

After that, you hadn't seen or heard lf the one-eyed boy until after lucerys death a few weeks after, to be exact, when your mother finally told you who killed him

After that day, you held a hatred for your uncle that wouldn't disapate even after the boy was dead.

You wanted to rid him of his other eye and leave him for the rest of his life blind.

You once held care for the boy, and it was wiped away the day your brother died with his dragon.

No amount of apologizing or begging would ever get you to see him the same as you used to

You only felt pain and anger when hearing that boys name, but aemond felt the opposite.

Guilt and pain swelling in the one-eyed boy as he never held hate for you no matter how much he tried, she was his one and only friend as a child and he never stopped being fascinated by her

He never meant to kill his nephew or hurt her in any type of way

But well.. an eye for an eye, some would say or rather a life for a life you'd say.

Now, this might be a bit bad, but man, it's 2am give me a break, and this might become a series idk thus was rushed as it has been sitting here for a bit as I was waiting for the new season and it's SO GOOD SO FAR BRO. I understand aemond a bit better now

[thatgirl4815]

Ray's Feelings

Ray's process of falling in love with Sand has such nuance to it that I think gets horribly overshadowed by his actions alone, not their context. Yes, Ray mistreats Sand. Yes, Ray has a lot to apologize for. But I think Ray is a broken person who has a lot to apologize for because he's in a situation that he is grossly under-equipped, both mentally and emotionally, to handle.

@victorialovesstiles' post here includes a great discussion of the moment Ray becomes fully aware of Sand's feelings for him in Ep8. Up to this point, I don't think Ray tried to pin down exactly how he felt for Sand because the situation didn't necessitate it. He and Sand were "friends," and that label was always fine with Ray, until it wasn't enough anymore, until Sand couldn't put up with it. Looking back on all of this progression, I'd argue Ray has had feelings for Sand for as long as Sand has had feelings for him, but he hasn't been in a place to confront them the same way Sand has. It makes sense given that Sand is the one in the bad spot, watching Ray chase after Mew. If their situations had been reversed, I think Ray would've had to contend with his feelings much more directly much earlier.

Ray makes comments like this that point to the depth of his feelings, but he never truly vocalizes them outright until later in Ep9. Ray realizing how happy he is with Sand and admitting to that is the first step in the recognition of his true feelings, that he sees Sand as more than a good friend who takes care of him and just so happens to sleep with him.

Ray's feelings are strong, but they are also delicate, as demonstrated by the fight at Sand's apartment in Ep10. This dialogue in particular:

Ray thinks he deserves to be upset for having his emotions played with, which says more than anything how much Ep9 meant to him. It's also important in the context of money, because Ray's self-worth is so heavily influenced by what he can offer other people: if nothing else, he has always had his wealth to fall back on. And here is Sand claiming to love him, but all Ray can see is someone who accepted payment. Every conversation they’ve about the separation of feelings and money is being put into question.

At the end of Ep10, Ray echoes his dialogue in Ep8. I personally like that Ray makes a point of saying how happy he is with Sand; what stands out to me here is that Ray is confessing this to imaginary Sand, so he's technically only really admitting it to himself. He makes me happy and I keep screwing it up. He does care, and he's always cared, but I can't do anything but ruin it. I was made to ruin things. Those are all thoughts that seem to lay at the core of his dialogue at the end of Ep10.

I guess my main point here is that we witness Ray returning to this idea time and time again that when he's with Sand, he's truly happy. Sand sees beyond his problems, beyond the brokenness. Even with how complex their situation is, there's something so beautiful about that simplicity. Sand makes Ray happy. That’s what it’s always boiled down to.

"I know now that you want nothing from me" -> I have a feeling this entire speech from Ray is going to form a deeper trust between Ray and Sand. Ray knows now that Sand is true. He knows that he has overthought everything. The reason why Ray skews the situation with Sand is because Ray is so used to viewing himself in a negative light, but he was clinging to the hope that Sand didn't see him that way. Even when other characters insult Ray for his behavior (which isn't entirely undeserved), Sand was always there to explain why he was wrong, to encourage him to be better. When it's Sand, it's about growth, not just recognition.

The ending scene in Ep10 is such a catharsis because Ray is finally coming to terms with the fact that virtually all of the doubts and complexities surrounding his relationship with Sand were created by him. But Sand has always been true. Sand has always loved him. And now that he sees that, he knows just how important it is that he clings to that love and never lets it go.

[swallowerofdharma]

Yashiro’s Cruel God part one

Disclaimer: this post contains a detailed and straightforward analysis of chapter 25. Doumeki isn’t the villain, if you were worried about that. Actually I must apologize because I wanted to talk about him too, but as usual I started this meta with Yashiro and got carried away. This is also why I am dividing it in parts to avoid having a very very long post. So other parts will hopefully follow to fully elaborate the premise I made. Thank you for understanding. And please take care of your wellbeing, if mentioning Yashiro’s stepfather upset you, maybe skip this one.

Premise: not a matter of perfection but of balance

This person I followed reblogged the Declarations of healthy adulthood by David Richo in big big font and - having only one thought on my mind apparently - I read all that text in Yashiro’s POV. I actually don’t think that this is a perfect model or anything, and I am generally skeptical of self help books (I only assume this is something like it), but why not use this as an example, while considering something that I find interesting about Yashiro and Doumeki? During the discussion about the latest chapter, I said something along the lines of Doumeki representing young love, while Yashiro’s approach has been more mature, and I meant it thinking about Yashiro being aware and cautious about hurting others [and being intentional when he does, since he put a bullet in Doumeki’s leg] and being quite self reliant, and yes I know that he is also afraid of being hurt/loved! in previous posts here, I have mentioned that Yashiro’s acceptance of his past is only-in-part denial or downplaying of trauma, because it has been also a strategy and an impressive sign of his maturity and determination to live in the present. Isn’t it exceptional that Yashiro doesn’t seem all that resentful of his parents? That he openly says that he doesn’t blame others? We have to confront his words always mindful of the fact that he usually is an unreliable narrator, but in many instances he says the truth or half truths and his demeanor confirmed that he did some of what David Richo proposes: I accept full responsibility for the shape my life has taken; I accept that I may never feel I am receiving - or have received - all the attention I seek; One by one, I drop every expectation of people and things; I let go of blame, regret, vengeance, and the infantile desire to punish those who hurt or reject me; No one can or needs to bail me out. I am not entitled to be taken care of by anyone or anything, I let go of control without losing control.

I thought that it was very interesting to consider the Yashiro/Doumeki dynamics from different angles, like older/younger, or even realist/romantic, for example. The point of this experiment isn’t to make a comparison of merit nor to talk about a character in better light than another. Maybe those differences need to be confronted or balanced: for example the realist maybe needs some of the romantic’s idealism to soar and not be stuck on the ground. Yoneda-san might be onto something so human and amazing here. An important clarification is due before saying anything else. As characters that are written as full human beings, with their complexity and contradictions, Yashiro and Doumeki can’t be put neatly into the opposite categories I proposed. The story is much more dynamic, so I ask you to take a further step and put those opposites at the ends of a spectrum and to move our characters freely in both directions. Yashiro tends toward being effectively the older and more realistic one but he has traits that make him move down towards the other end too, even to the extreme of being childish. Consider for example these other statements, from the Declarations of healthy adulthood: I need never fear my own truth, powers, fantasies wishes, thoughts, sexuality, dreams, or ghosts; When change and growth scare me, I still choose them. I may act with fear, but never because of it; I am still safe when I cease following the rules my parents (or others) set for me; If people knew me as I really am, they would love me for being human like them. These points clearly demonstrate Yashiro’s unresolved problems, where he is stuck if you want, and why probably nobody believed me when I pointed at him as being mature (eh, he has his moments tho, you can’t deny that).

I challenge everyone to consider that those four points in particular are quite challenging for most people in general, but particularly so for someone who has fear/betrayal as the foundational principle in their childhood instead of a normal amount even a scarse amount of parental love/safety. And I want to underline childhood here, not teenage years or later.

I need never fear my own truth, powers, fantasies wishes, thoughts, sexuality, dreams, or ghosts. Yashiro here is a mix of contradictions, because he outwardly seems to own those things, even making them a point of his persona, but most of those things are based on the lies he told himself, or his stepfather told him: see this other point

I am still safe when I cease following the rules my parents (or others) set for me. Isn’t this statement extremely helpful to understand Yashiro’s situation? To feel safe he had to build his personality according to the rules of the one who had all the power over him and had already taken away any sense of security from him. This is probably one of those things that can be hard to understand when you have never been there. Most notably, not only in the manga this has been pointed out, but it has been pointed out by Yashiro himself. He is self conscious of this, he knows that he lied to himself as a child, that he had to, and he is constantly choosing to continue lying because that is still the only foundation he has. There was no familial love, no other relative safety. Letting go of the lies actually means going to pieces and breaking down.

This isn’t different from what happens to people who are tortured. Yashiro’s father completely took away any sense of security and safety. The aggravating circumstances were that Yashiro as a child didn’t have any other point of reference or knowledge to understand what was happening with his body and in that state of mind what his father told him had to be the only truth possible. Parents who abuse their children most often don’t even realize what they are doing to its full extent. That’s the immense cruelty of these types of situations. The rules are lies, but the lies are rules to follow to be safe:

You like it when it hurts, right? If it doesn’t hurt, I can’t get into it.

What happened in chapter 25: why now?

Yashiro didn’t want to have sex with Doumeki and said so repeatedly. Doumeki has grown on him, behind liking his physical appearance or using him as a substitute for Kageyama: Yashiro truly liked this person and he liked that Doumeki was impotent. Thanks to that, Yashiro grew comfortable around Doumeki and with comfort and safety comes familiarity. When Yashiro discovered that the impotence was gone, he was angry and terrified. They had become too close and now the premise has changed and Yashiro couldn’t trust Doumeki or himself anymore. I won’t analyze here the scene in the shower but I’ll skip to the point. Doumeki only understood that his love was required, that he was wanted and stopped thinking. He acted passionately like any young person who had a normal foundation in love would. He didn’t understand anything that Yashiro asked or why there were mixed signals and what it all meant. He pushed and hurt and broke without being aware of what he was doing.

And Yashiro was trapped in a situation he had tried to escape from his all life: with a person who felt familiar, a person he loved and relied on, in the safety of a home, who wanted sex and was going to do what he wanted regardless of what Yashiro had to say. Yashiro desperately tried to control what was happening through usual patterns, making it hurt, asking Doumeki to do from behind, detaching the sex from his emotions, but he couldn’t and for the first time in his life sex was different from what he knew, because while Yashiro had loved his stepfather, his father didn’t love him and he didn’t treat him like Doumeki did. And every lies built around his father’s abuse came to the surface. Including the fact that his father never loved him. Doumeki broke him indeed because he broke through the lies/rules upon which Yashiro had intentionally built his entire personality/safety. And he wasn’t ready for it, he specifically said he didn’t want it, he had known all along, he already knew when men before Doumeki tried to make love to him and when he built a strategy to specifically avoid being confronted with those lies/rules. He didn’t love those men. He did love Doumeki though. But once again Yashiro didn’t have a choice. And he was physically hurt and recovering after being shot and knowing his life was in danger outside of that room. He had just discovered that Doumeki lied about being impotent the previous time he touched him in the car and before that. It was probably the worst timing possible for making love. At some point Yashiro grew resigned and even reciprocated a little, reaching for Doumeki, caressing his face, and he even reassured him before he fell asleep. There were words that Doumeki said that Yoneda didn’t disclose fully, choosing instead to immediately took us in the flashback with Yashiro. I think it is probable that what Doumeki said was something that Yashiro’s father had said and that we are going to confront before the end of the manga. I personally want to know these words more than what Yashiro said while an airplane passed by and Doumeki was unconscious. Morbid maybe on my part.

I have stated that I am not going to make Doumeki a villain here. The point of this analysis is just to see where Doumeki was in terms of maturity. To be continued…

[ladyazurith]

Cater Diamond Analysis

Honestly, my first impressions of Cater were…not good. When I very first started playing Twist, I picked Idia as my starting character because I love Hades (not the Disney version but the classical Greek mythology version, though the Disney version is great he’s a terrible representation of Hades but I think everyone knows that) After playing the game Azul quickly became my favorite (That’s why my first Broken Mirrors story was about him) and just Octavinelle in general. 

When I first picked up Twist I kind of sped through books 1 and 2. At the time I was still knee deep in the MHA fandom and was playing the game because a friend recommended it (they’d followed the JP release) And didn’t really absorb much. Books 3 and 4’s release is when I really started to pay attention. My Ao3 page definitely reflects this given stories started appearing in April of 22. 

The first thing I really remembered about Cater was Beans Day and I was overall just annoyed with him because I wanted to spend more time with Jade. And Cater it seemed was the reason he kept leaving. 

Another thing is I have Cater’s Birthday SSR from the first year (it was the very first Birthday Card we got in the EN version) I do not remember pulling for it, let alone actually getting his card but it’s there so…*shrugs* 

It wasn’t until I saw a music video on YouTube set to Kill the Lights, that I even took a second glance at Cater as a character. The video made me compare him to Twice from MHA (I was again still attached to the fandom at the time) and I loved Twice, so I started digging more. Twice has an incredibly tragic backstory and it made me curious about Cater’s. 

After that I dug through all the information I could about Cater, both in EN and JP releases, I watched translations of all his available vignettes or others he was in, and events he was a part of. I’ve always loved picking characters apart and I found that Cater was far more complex than I first gave him credit for. There are a few key cards/events that I believe are essential for understanding who Cater is.

First is of course is Heartslabyul’s chapter of the game. I know a lot of people will point to this and say it’s why they don’t trust him or take him seriously, but context is key. Yes, he does “manipulate” the group into doing some of his chores.  But in the wider context of the story, Cater is often left doing a lot of extra work around the dorm. Picking up the slack, because of his clones and making up for the mistakes of others. (Trey’s CR Card is a good window into this, along with Trey’s Star Sending Card) And honestly, this is about the worst thing he does throughout the entire game. 

What is also shown is that Cater is very forgiving. He’s never actually upset with Riddle for the way he behaves. It’s not that he condones his actions, but he knows why Riddle behaves the way he does and tries his best to be understanding while also helping the 1st years navigate the situation and in a way protect them. (He even asks Trey if he’s okay with what’s going on when Ace and Deuce get kicked out) Even at the end when Ace gets on Riddle for his apology Cater chastises him. In the end, Cater is very conflict averse, he doesn’t really want to fight with people, and would rather everyone just get along (this is part of why he Kalim and Lilia all get along so well in the LMC) I think some people see his reaction in the manga, and take his reason for not wanting to step in wrong. Personally, I don’t think it had completely clicked with him that this wasn’t an altercation that could be ended peacefully. He didn’t want to hurt anyone. 

There are a lot of hints that Cater is fairly depressed under his happy come-what-may attitude. His Labcoat personal story is less than subtle about it, (Vil and Lilia straight-up talk about what the Mandrake Cater tried to hide meant), And even his CR card shows that he’s not really a fan of all the socializing he does, and finds it exhausting. He also isn't afraid of death, at least as his clones, in the Heartslabyul Manga he takes a spear to the chest to save Deuce, and in Chapter 2 he creates replicas of the Diasomnia Spelldive team and allows himself to be trampled. The level he's nonchalant about it is a bit disturbing, especially because he can remember what happens as his clones (he makes a comment about not being able to use them to study because the information can get jumbled up) and they have been stated to *be* him. (this is part of why I HC that Cater's clones can confuse Rook's UM because he can't tell a clone from the real Cater)

Another really important one is Cater’s Halloween SSR (and really the first two Halloween events), His SSR is one of the few times we get to see his thoughts so clearly. He’s excellent at hiding his true thoughts and feelings. The conversation he has with Lilia and Kalim about not being really close to anyone, and preferring to keep people at arm's length is heartbreaking because it comes from a place of moving around, being forgotten, and being hurt. Everything Cater does is an effort to get people to remember him, from his guitar to his magicam account. 

At the end of his SSR is a very touching moment between Diasomnia as Lilia comforts Malleus, Cater’s left to the side feeling completely bitter about all of it. Angry Lilia thought he could ever understand him when he had connections like Malleus, Silver, and Sebek in his life. Connections Cater doesn’t feel he can ever make. The follow up to this is when he’s still standing there and gets the call from Trey who yells at him because he’s not in Heartslabyul to help solve a problem there, and gets called a liar when he explains what he was doing. (People sometimes ask me why I don’t like Trey and this scene right here is part of that reason.) 

As for the rest of the first Halloween, the only time we really see him relaxed is in Lilia’s card. Every other time he’s working, solving problems, or helping other people. Even at the very end when everyone else was relaxing at the after party, he was off comforting the Ghosts who felt guilty about causing all the problems with their picture in the beginning, helping them feel better and bringing the subject up to others.  

In the second Halloween event, he was one of the possessed missing students. I don’t think everyone realizes this but all the ghosts made the ones they’d possessed act in the exact opposite of their true nature. (Vil who he was stuck with is a great example, he was crying acting like someone who had no self-esteem, but the things he was saying were in complete contrast to his behavior, which in reality Vil acts like a very self assured person on the surface but deep down he’s a doubt ridden insecure mess. Kalim is another he was angry and violent) 

Cater was forced to be cruel and malicious, which lines up with being the opposite of who he really is from the little bits we’ve seen. He often tends to go out of his way to help people. When they needed help in the final act of Endless Halloween when the other students appeared he was the first one to step up to help take care of it. In Silver’s card, he took the time to console him and give him advice but even his advice to live in the moment and don’t care about what happens in the future tells us a lot about him.

Even Beans Day and the fact he stuck with Yuu (something that first annoyed me) is an example of this. A lot of people saw “us” as a liability and ditched the MC in the very competitive game, but Cater didn’t he stayed, and in the end, they almost won. 

Other notes along the way are he never really talks positively about his family. He’s always complaining about how overbearing his sisters are. How they treated him like a doll. Bought presents for him that were meant for them, not him, etc. And I know what he says about his dislike of sugar and how it came from one incident as a child BUT that’s not very likely. I have a feeling it was more than *one* incident and a repeated dismissal of his own autonomy in his family BUT that is just a theory. Personally, I think he downplayed the event like he seems to do a lot of these things. It’s very clear he generally conceals how he truly feels about an incident. 

He even comments about how he doesn’t want to go home over winter break because he knows his sisters will just put him to work. In his second year birthday jacket card he talks about how his sisters take him shopping and force him to carry everything. Every time his family comes up it's never in a positive context. 

In his Silks card, it’s shown he has a problem buying things for himself. Jamil pokes him about it, while he’s buying souvenirs for other people, and in the end, makes Jamil pick something for him. We get hints that Jamil can see past the facade he puts up and that makes Cater nervous BUT we also know Jamil absolutely trusts Cater. He left Kalim in Cater’s care in Silk City, and even though Kalim doesn’t generally eat anything but Jamil’s cooking (not even his own) Kalim is the one that judges Cater’s culinary crucible meal. And the way Jamil conducts himself in Cater’s birthday interview. 

Cater also tends to treat people as people. He’s never really been intimidated by Malleus, not the same way other people are (outside Yuu/MC), and will talk to him freely. When realistically he has more reason than most to be afraid of Malleus. It takes a bit of stringing of different card stories and events together, but Malleus has knocked Cater unconscious with his magic before. Because in Malleus’s first Birthday card, he talks about the incident, where Lilia invited him to the LMC, to play music, but he accidentally knocked the members unconscious. We know that Kalim arrived late in his 2nd year and that during Cater and Lilia’s first year, they were very quickly the only members of the LMC until Kalim joined. Meaning when the incident took place the only available victim was Cater. 

I also know Cater talks about not having a lot of money/not coming from a wealthy family, BUT I know this isn’t true. While it's not likely his family is as rich as I’ve made them in my stories, they are NOT poor. First off they move AT least every two years, and that is NOT cheap to do. We know his dad works for a bank, but there aren’t many positions at a Bank on any level that would require the person to move so much. Bankers are some of the wealthiest people period (not the tellers or general employees but those wouldn’t require moving)  Looking into it, his dad is most likely an investment banker which make $$$. This is also backed up by the fact that he does chase trends that take an incredible amount of money, and he’s talked about doing things like going “Glamping” which costs upwards of 1-1.5k/night  Then again maybe his perception is warped by Kalim lol. 

As far as his relationships go. I do think his perception is a bit skewed from past experiences. Riddle seems to care an awful lot about him/considers him a friend. I think this is very much a case of Riddle taking Cater at face value, not having the social awareness to realize Cater is faking most of what he’s doing. While Cater is still stuck on the idea that Riddle is just another shallow friendship for him. 

I also think Kalim thinks more of their friendship than Cater does. I also always wonder how Vil can insist the only thing Cater wants out of him is fame when *Kalim’s standing right there* While Kalim isn’t famous in the same sense Vil is, he’s INCREDIBLY wealthy and it wouldn’t take much for him to leverage that for his own fame, but we don’t really see him doing that, yes he does make posts with Kalim but it all seems to be in line with his friendship with him and things they do with the club, and the time Kalim invited him to Silk City. There is no hint Cater takes advantage of him at all (which I think plays into why Jamil trusts him)

Speaking of Vil, the reason I ship Cater and Vil is very detailed and delves into the nuance of their interactions and relationship otherwise. I know it’s easy to point at Vil’s “What it means to be a Brand” R card Vin, where Cater talks about how attractive he is and talks about dating him. (I’m still mad they took that out of the English version) as a reason, and while it is part of it Vil doesn’t tell him he won't date him, he tells Cater he can’t afford them. (Which to me sounds like a shallow comment?!?! When he calls Cater Shallow, gets a bit on my nerves but that's another rant) 

But what really sells me that Cater’s feelings for Vil are real and not part of his fake facade is his Birthday Jacket interview. He picks Vil as his choice of sibling and then goes on to talk about why he looks up to and respects Vil. It’s not about his physical features, but other traits he likes and appreciates. He seems to understand Vil. And this is my take on it but I think part of why he likes Vil (either romantically or otherwise) is he sees a kindred spirit, someone who puts on a mask to face an uncaring world that expects impossible standards, and the need to always be ‘on’ and performing. Remember it's clear that Cater doesn’t enjoy what he does social media-wise and the like, but it's something he feels like he has to do.

Trey is otherwise not someone he’s super close to. To me, their relationship comes across more like coworkers at a stressful job, than actual friends. Cater himself has said more than once that he’s not close to *anyone* and Trey in the star sending even talks about how even after all the time they’ve spent together Cater still doesn’t seem to trust him with his true self. Trey tends to be very dismissive of Cater’s complaints and Cater in general. And straight up TO HIS FACE told him he’d always be closer to Riddle. (As someone who didn’t have childhood friends themselves, and even now struggles with friends that line right there hurt a lot. That the idea that if you didn’t make a friend when you were a child then you could never be close to someone more than they are to someone else hurt and made me angry. And did not help my opinion of Trey AT ALL  Length of time is not the only qualifier to a strong friendship) But yet tends to also be dismissive of Riddle in some cases?!?! And is willing to manipulate him so there's that. 

I did an entire write up of Lilia and Cater’s relationship, but a summary is that I find it one of the most unique and complex in the game. Often times Lilia tends to treat the other students like he’s a mentor figure. Not just Diasomnia, but all of them in general when he interacts. Cater however isn’t treated that way and seems to view him more as an equal, and has been shown to listen to and take advice from him when he’s otherwise shown to be very stubborn and determined. And it's possible he intended to stay in contact with Cater when he attempted to leave in ch 7. Cater tells him that he can hit him up on Magicam at any time which means Lilia hasn’t deactivated his account (Cater would likely know that) and Lilia doesn’t tell him he can’t like he had with other attempts to stay in contact, but he doesn’t say he will either so it's more up in the air. 

Idia…also seems to listen to him!?! Honestly Idia and Cater’s relationship also probably deserves their own post. I don’t ship them, mostly because I think they’d end up in a self destructive spiral. BUT I do think they could be friends, like really good friends if they could both get past some of their issues. They have a lot in common, especially when it comes to being lonely and detached certain everyone will just forget about them someday. 

Over all Cater is an extremely complex person, and really about the only character who we don’t know a lot about. Most of what we have on him is how other characters view him, (which is why I think there is a lot of misconception and distrust of his character for people because they buy into what they see on the surface and move on)  and a few scraps here and there into who he actually is under the surface which completely contradicts the persona he presents. 

I have a lot of headcanons for him, and while I noted a few here in this, I tried to keep this to most extrapolation from what we see directly in canon. I love Cater, and I hope this helps some people have a better understanding of who he is. 

[veespee]

Vinnie is *such* a complex character i feel. And he makes me feel very conflicted, but here are some (personal) opinions about him: (kinda an analysis? idk i'm just rambling)

-Firstly, he's the voyeur, although unknowingly. The word “voyeur” has two meanings, the first one is.. we won't talk about it, but the *second* one is: a person who enjoys seeing the pain or distress of others. Now, i don't really think he actually likes seeing people in pain. Of course, he shows remorse and guilt over the deaths of his close ones, and even people he didn't know that where victims, so why voyeur? Why would HABIT describe him as a “voyeuristic fuck”?

So, i may be getting some lore wrong, and i apologize in advance, but it's revealed that he has led everyone to their deaths, due to his insistence to keep filming and find answers. Also, if i remember right, he had intentionally left out footage that caused him to be seen in a bad light, and it showed that he had led Jeff and Alex to their doom.

-Now, of course for any sane person, why would someone do that? The answer is… well, for answers. That's the word he seems to be infatuated with, ’answers’. And it's made pretty clear. He saw what HABIT was doing, he saw the state Evan was in, and he knew. He was fully aware, he's not stupid, and he knew what he was doing. If Evan wasn't going to do what Vinnie was telling him to, then… he was going to summon HABIT. He was also aware of HABIT's intelligence/experience with the human race, which was good for him, since he was going to get his questions answered.

-Now’s the trick question (for me at least), is Vinnie a horrible person? Well… yes, and no? I mean, he did do horrible things, that much can be said. He led everyone to doom, he purposefully ignored people's wishes (Evan's request for Vinnie not to upload the video about Jesse's grandmother dying), and of course, continuing to record after all of these things happened, despite Jeff's and Evan's wishes. But he feels incredibly guilty. “Sometimes you gotta do stuff that you don't agree with, but that's the price you pay. But you gotta remember, sometimes the price is too steep, and you just can't live with yourself... I'm sorry... I'm so sorry to everyone that I've hurt, to everyone that has died, around me or because of me.” (these are his own words).

I honestly believe he's a very, very flawed character. His goal is answers, and he will do anything to get them. He has the drive to get what he desperately wants, even after being tortured by HABIT. And i feel that HABIT has some respect for him because of that. And of course, his role was set from the start. Everything was calculated, and he was fulfilling his role, “the voyeur”, “the guardian”, whatever it may be. Everything happened for a reason, the God Killer was created, Vinnie's “purpose” was completed. I guess he could be described as a pawn, a follower that was blinded by his desperation for knowledge and control, but fell into the traps of the bigger entities at play.

thank you for reading! i apologize if i got any characteristics wrong, i just wanted to get my thoughts out. and this is very yap-y, so here's a TL;DR:

Vinnie is a complex ass character, who's blinded by his search for control and answers. He's guilty and self loathing, but avoids responsibility. Basically… opinions vary about him, you either love him or hate him.

[no-m4gic]

Hi! I'm the anom who asked for the autistic reader and I loved your writing! So may I request the same THH characters but with a reader who's try to be the sunshine in their lives (example: help Chihiro to be himself), but is secretly depressed and hide It from them cause reader doesn't want to seem fragile?

Sorry If Is complex XD thx!

i have limited free time so i know im probably never gonna complete (another) request(s) today. also i discovered i have no idea how to write for hifumi and yasuhiro, so i'm gonna blacklist them and replace them with mukuro. felt like this request seemed like a good prompt for nagito and also i feel like i could replace ishimaru's one with komaeda's as an apology.

sorry if you wanted the girls too, i'll get on them as soon as i finish my work- i didn't have enough time to write for them. i'll write for ishimaru, too. sorry for missing a lot of characters!

p.s thanks guys for your support !! i appreciate it sm <33

that's a long title 😨

the tags are such a PAIN

~ mod sitaya

THH CHARACTERS W/ AN S/O WHO IS THEIR SUNSHINE BUT IS SECRETLY DEPRESSED

BYAKUYA TOGAMI

"damnit s/o, why didn't you tell me earlier? you know i wouldn't judge you."

money = happiness to him, so he wouldn't fully understand your pain. he'll still support you though, if you need anything he'll send one of his workers to get it for you.

i mean if you were gone, yeah, he'd definitely be upset, so whenever he couldn't understand, he'll just imagine how he'll be like if you died or something.

he'll hire a personal therapist for you, unless you want him to be your therapist... which trust me, he is not good at.

bro can't even comfort anyone without making them cry more.

since he can't comfort someone psychologically, he'll comfort them physically, though he'll only show displays of affection at home or when you guys are alone, n e v e r in public.

honestly at this point, he won't give a shit if you stain his rich people clothes with your tears, he can buy the same new clothes again.

he's not that desperate, but can you imagine byakuya singing his s/o a lullaby?

not really, but he'll tuck you into bed himself personally if you fall asleep while sobbing your eyes out.

if you don't, he'll ask if you wanna fly out of japan for awhile, on his rich people private jet.

it's the least he could do to repay you for helping him during his dark times.

MAKOTO NAEGI

"s/o. how could you hide this from me? did you think i was going to criticize you...?"

he wouldn't ask the million questions running through his head first, he'd hold you first.

you come before anything.

he'll hold you for as long as you'd like, letting you cry in his shoulder while he rubs your back and pats your head.

since you helped him show the others he isn't an 'omega male' and also chased everyone who bullied him away, he'll return the favor.

he'll tell the teacher that you weren't feeling well and needed some time to rest in your room.

also he'll bring you your homework so you don't have to get it yourself and do tons of paperwork at once after coming back.

you don't need a therapist, you have naegi tell them as your therapist.

he'll listen to you go on for the entire day, and if you need to break down, you can jump into his arms and break down, using his shirt as a handkerchief.

MONDO OOWADA

"damnit... who did this s/o?!"

honestly he might just break down too.

but then he'll tell himself he's gotta be a man, with balls in front of his s/o.

he'll put his coat around you and hug you, telling you that it's alright and you can let everything out.

you can take that in any way.

he feels really guilty whenever he has to leave you for training or a competition.

but he'll always come back with a gift and your favorite takeout.

if you ever wanna cuddle, go find him. he'll be more than happy to have a reason to hold you.

daily compliments whenever you two meet up.

CHIHIRO FUJISAKI

"s/o, it's okay. you're not hopeless, you're filled with hope, you still have so much more potential,"

he'll offer to accompany you to do some activities to keep your mind distracted and also to cheer you up.

something maybe like styling your hair and making it look ridiculous by putting tons of bright, glittery accessories on your hair.

he'd ask if sharing his own insecurities would help, maybe just so you know he has other countless insecurities than just him fearing showing the others he's a guy.

if making your hair look worse than junko's didn't cheer you up, chihiro would make up some stupid games like hop like a bunny into mondo's room or sing one of sayaka's songs outside makoto's room while he's showering.

speaking of sayaka's songs, he'll blast all her upbeat pop songs in the room and you two can dance your heart out.

LEON KUWATA

"i figured. now come here i'm gonna cuddle your sadness away!"

leon would definitely try to remain positive

the only good side would be that he could skip his daily weekday baseball training, since y'know he likes hates baseball.

but no, really, he'd have NO idea on how to comfort someone properly.

he'd ask what he could do to make you feel better.

as well as bring you out to get ice cream.

while you guys are out you may or may not encounter celestia's cat wandering around aimlessly... and bring it back to leon's room.

obviously you guys return her, maybe style her a little, watch leon get scratched by her and so on.

overall at least you recovered quickly and now everyone can see you smile again <3

BONUS ;; NAGITO KOMAEDA

NAGITO KOMAEDA

"oh s/o. you didn't have to hide it from me, hopeless trash like me don't have the right to judge hopeful people like you,"

well now it was his turn to have his clothes stained with tears.

countless outfits of yours have been stained with his tears, because whenever you'd return late (which was always) he'd think you left him or something, and the closest thing he has to you are your clothes.

he's clingy.

and he'll become clingier.

everywhere you go he'll follow you like a lost puppy.

lost puppy literally. he won't just follow you, he'll beg for your attention.

anyway... back to you, once you even mention you were upset he'd pull you into a tight hug.

imagine how long that tight hug would be with depressed.

verrrrrry verrry long.

he'd wish he didn't have to let go of you.

and he wouldn't. you'd have to literally wait for him to fall asleep just to work your way out his arms.

he'll shower you in compliments and bless you with encouragements.

if you wanted he could ask gundham for a cat or dog or something, or he'd blackmail gundham just to "borrow" the four dark devas of destruction for like 10 minutes before giving them back even though nagito would lie and say they'd forever be gone.

you want, he buy. literally, you just have to say "i want this" and you'll have it.

no more despair only hope.

IM SORRY ITS MISSING SO MANY CHARACTERS ANON 😭

[wraith-caller]

@li-binauje-artisse left this as part of their response to me dissecting Darian's dialog about Rogier, and it encapsulates everything that frustrates me about the way this pair are interpreted. Not just as a couple/friends, but as individuals. It's indicative of how large chunks of the fandom, in spite of apparently desperately clamoring for complex characters and nuanced storytelling, can't actually handle it.

Let's start with Rogier. "Innocent martyr fighting for social justice". It hits the nail right on the head. I see him characterized as any of the following: hating the Golden Order, a rebel, defiant, a revolutionary, 'the good guy', a progressive. But does his story actually bear that out?

No, it doesn't. Here he is, talking about the Golden Order:

The battle art you've learned is of the glintstone family. They were conceived at the great Academy of Raya Lucaria, to the north of this castle. In the past, they obeyed laws which contravened the Golden Order, or so I'm told. Fascinating, isn't it? That the Golden Order was pliable enough to absorb practices that contradicted itself in the past. With the Order broken, twisted, and in need of repair, such adaptability is more important now than ever.

Nowhere in Rogier's dialog does he speak ill of the Golden Order itself. Nowhere does he say he's intent on tearing it down, that it needs to be stopped, that it needs to be erased. He's not a champion of human rights looking to topple a cruel and violent regime. He admires the Golden Order's pliability, knows it has a flaw, and seeks to fix it. He's an academic with a single-minded obsession, and that obsession is repairing this error. Even his interest in the undead seems less about the undead themselves being oppressed and more about the fact they are a consequence of a broken system. From his perspective, if we were to simply fix that bug, then everything would be fine again! Nevermind that the Order is founded on violence and genocides, that it is built on a brutal caste system which denies those who don't fit within it their basic rights. His perspective on it has narrowed down to this one issue - which, don't get me wrong, it definitely is an issue needing fixed. But it's like putting a band aid on a paper cut while ignoring all the stab wounds. There are a lot of terrible things at work here, and it's going to take more than one thing to fix any of it.

I'm not saying Rogier is a fervent acolyte, or that it's totally unreasonable to think he may care about some of these other issues, but we don't see any of that. He's also not a defiant person. He's not a rebel. In fact, his behavior often displays the opposite, that he is quite the people pleaser, that he is someone who is not keen on 'rocking the boat' and drawing potentially negative attention to himself. His repeated apologizing to us for things like being paralyzed or getting injured, his willingness to lie to others to avoid upsetting them, his pleasant demeanor in spite of his inner turmoil, and his about face in his cut dreambrew dialog where he switches from resentful to gracious at the drop of a hat are all evidence of this. He is not some free-spirited revolutionary who will proudly defy the oppressive system. Even with the issue of TWLID, he's cautious about sharing his perspective on it, knowing it is an uncommon one that would raise someone's ire. He says we "may find this peculiar" when he tells us he wants to save the dead, not just because of one bad conversation with Darian, but because this is likely an unusual perspective period, among the majority of people.

What frustrates me about people taking these traits away from him and making him into some self-assured and confident trailblazer is that it erases a story about someone finally being able to find their spine after a potential lifetime of setting himself aside to please others. He expresses nothing of himself, none of his miseries and griefs, except this one belief that has become so important to him that he's willing to lose someone he once cared about over it. Rogier is not someone who was always brave and defiant. He is someone learning, at the last minute, how to stand up for himself and have the courage to put his foot down. Making him out to be some hero of the underdogs robs him of that, and kind of minimizes a lot of his emotional issues. It also often overlooks his own participation in this oppressive system - not just that he used to likely hunt the dead alongside Darian, but that he encourages us to become Elden Lord and perpetuate the existence of the Golden Order. Maybe we fix this one problem he's invested in solving, but what about all the others that will continue to exist?

Okay, so how about Darian? "The Hater." "Fascist zealot," as @irithylldancer (and let's be real, anyone who has looked at any discussion about Darian at all) has seen him called before. After all, how could anyone hate zombies cursed to live without a soul who enact violence on people without apparent cause? A lot of folks point out that any enemy is like that, and will just attack on sight, but that's just plain not true. Variants of wandering nobles will actually flee from you and beg you to spare them, so it's not like the devs couldn't have thrown a few TWLID with these behaviors in if we were really supposed to think it's just a matter of us terrorizing them.

But that's besides the point anyway. This is about lost nuance in characters. The nuance with Darian is often lost at this: people see the game use the word 'Fundamentalist' and think instantly of the real world group that is referred to with the same term. That is, Christian conservatives who are often quite regressive, with racist/bigoted biases. Sorry folks, but that's not what a Golden Order Fundamentalist is. So what are they?

Law of Regression: The fundamentalists describe the Golden Order through the powers of regression and causality. Regression is the pull of meaning; that all things yearn eternally to converge.

Law of Causality: The fundamentalists describe the Golden Order through the powers of regression and causality. Causality is the pull between meanings; it is the connections that form the relationships of all things.

Golden Order Principia: Prayerbook of the Golden Order fundamentalists. A dense and complex academic treatise that contains the Order's fundamental principles.

Golden Order seal: Fundamentalism is scholarship in all but name.

Is that clear enough? GO Fundamentalists are not "the racist part". They are not "the bigoted part". They are the SCHOLARS. They are devoted to understanding the fundamentals of the Golden Order. This is NOT the same as real world Christian Fundamentalism. The hunters aren't trying to destroy a culture that's foreign to them, or eliminate a racial group, or put down the disabled(though obviously the GO is still horrible and does things like that), or 'hunting the dead for sport' like it's just a fun game for them. They're fighting a literal plague, a curse that undoes death and leaves soulless corpses shambling across the lands, inflicting violence on others. It's not bigotry to think deathroot is a problem. It's not fascism to want to stop an illness from spreading. It's not cruel to want to prevent corpses - who inherently can't consent to anything - from being plucked out of the ground like daisies and forced to shamble around soullessly and suffer existence whether they want to or not. Even Goldmask, in his criticism of the hunters, is not upset with their treatment of TWLID. He's disappointed in their desire to have an evil to defeat, which he doubts is even a possibility. Order Healing says:

The noble Goldmask lamented what had become of the hunters. How easy it is for learning and learnedness to be reduced to the ravings of fanatics; all the good and the great wanted, in their foolishness, was an absolute evil to contend with. Does such a notion exist in the fundamentals of Order?

Goldmask isn't mourning the undead, and he isn't condemning the hunters for their treatment of them. He is saying what the game itself repeatedly says to us through these nuanced stories told with every single character: there is no absolute evil to be found. You can quash this problem of deathroot and its consequences, and there are still a thousand more flaws in this Order because the very nature of rule by man is itself flawed, because humans are imperfect creatures. Rogier tells us the undead aren't evil, they simply exist whether they want to or not. The problem is the hunters like Darian are looking for an outside evil to defeat when there isn't one. The undead may be violent, they may kill, they may be cursed, but this doesn't make them inherently evil. They only exist through a loophole in the Order, and the hunters deny that such a loophole could exist because the Order must be perfect.

Even with his flawed beliefs, Darian is far from hateful or a fascist. He laments the death of a criminal when we meet him. He tries to deter us from harm. He offers us help by showing us the waygate to Caelid, and asks - not demands - that we take his place in serving Gurranq. He never asks us if we're allied with the Golden Order, never asks us to prove we're ideologically pure or even aligned with him. He eagerly calls us a comrade, and in spite of his disagreement with Rogier, continues helping him with his research. The only thing he despises are TWLID, and yes, his hatred of them is intense, and it is probably irrational to some degree - it's very unlikely they're as aware and conscious as a normal, non-undead human being would be, and we know they didn't spring up out of the ground because they felt like defying the Marika's will. But his hatred is also not baseless. It's not him hearing from the Order that these are his enemies and he must hate them because they are Different. His hatred is a result of witnessing their violence firsthand. The game didn't go out of its way to introduce him mourning a victim of the undead for no reason.

And beyond this, there's a far more personal reason he must preserve the Order, why he must fervently believe they are right about who is accursed and who isn't. He and Devin were completely shunned from every society except the Golden Order. Of course he's attached, of course he's invested. If his options are "Golden Order or nothing", he's going to take the Golden Order, and it's really difficult to blame someone for making a choice like that. If you are rejected from birth by every society except one, you're going to be desperate enough for that acceptance that you'll do anything to keep your place in it. So when met with Rogier's revelation that the Golden Order is wrong about who is cursed and who isn't, doesn't it make perfect sense that Darian doesn't handle it so well?

No this isn't the first time I've ranted about this and it probably won't be the last. I just love these characters too much and hate seeing their rich potential for interesting storytelling reduced to a black-and-white narrative for easy consumption. No aspect of this game includes a simple, straightforward progressive vs regressive, hero vs villain, good guy vs bad guy story, even down to characters as minor as Rogier and Darian.

[mrstsung]

Omfg these shang tsung pics be sending me

Cw: mini vent in there. Srry bout that.

Especially this last one. Omfg the face and reaction is how i feel about mk12/mk1

* (and personal vent here but the fact people just seems to me,never liked or truly appreciated shang until he was turned way younger and it pisses me off and grosses me out that people are obsessed with alan lees shang tsung's appearance,yet don't appreciate shang tsung as a character truly. Like honey i find shang hot young or old,but especially that dilf look,and love his complex character as well,we are not the fucking same,like i feel so much more can be done with his character yet people are too damn scaredy cat on it to do it properly. Also plz be normal about mr.alan lee,he doesn't deserve to be hounded by horny fangirls/guys like that,plz be normal about his shang tsung at least try to. He has amazing talent,he's a cool dude it seems,but damn man. Chill. I could say the same for Mr.Tagawa, tho that man has earned his dues and deserves rest and respect. I dunno man i just feel nobody truly loves the character and if they cant love him at his dilf and gilf look. Then they don't deserve him young,scholarly, and college guy age. Also it concerns me they gotta make everyone so young. It's disturbing. More so cuz there's no natural facelines or wrinkles or anything. It feel fake and airbrushed. Mk12/mk1 is so gross on the faces to me. Mk11 felt like fucking real people because they actually used face models. And it was better. Because maybe it's me but when they go freehand,it feels fake,wonky,and grossly dated and it's supposed to be a "new" game? Like i dunno maybe it's just me. But there's no shame in using actual references. But they dont wanna pay them and they wanna use them without giving them body autonomy. That's the problem. And that's where this becomes an issue. If they learned,they'd actually give the characters face lines and not make them so young and babyfaced and maybe im tired of games having people look like they are going thru a midlife crisis? I just feel mk11 didn't deserve the hate it got. And i am guilty i admit for harsh judgment. And i apologize. But i never knew the mk12/mk1 game was gonna be THAT bad. But it did,and it is,and for that i gotta say on a final note. Fuck 12.) *

But mk11 shang tsung,mk11 aftermath especially. His facial expressions are priceless.

And i feel it needs to be talked about more the charisma shang has in mk11. (Again not saying he never had it. He does. But nobody does sassy,rizz worthy,bad guy swagger lioe cary hiroyuki tagawa. Im sorry.)

[maybe-boys-do-love]

Throughout the Trainee, I’ve been waiting for the shoe to drop—for some big reveal about an ultimate problem at the company or for someone to be fired who had gone too far—but the show is too mature, it has to much compassion towards all of its characters (and towards people’s humanity in general) to do that.

I saw so many instances of mistakes happening, some more obvious, some subtle, some key to the plot, some seemingly background fodder, some addressed by the characters explicitly, and some that the characters or the show just seemed to observe without commenting on. Some of these mistakes didn’t amount to anything, like the broken hard drive, and some of them caused real physical harm to people in the show, like the cosmetic mix-up during testing. I presumed there was a kind of accumulation happening. I thought that the mistakes were adding up to something, a bigger conclusion about this work environment, or a commentary on work environments and society at large. The Trainee, however, refuses to construct a larger theory about work and life’s problems. It refuses to condemn anyone or any one thing to that extent. Each mistake is its own problem. And each person is capable of contributing to it and finding a way to move past it.

You see, what Jane says here is the core theme of the show:

(GIF by @ryansjane )

Don’t assume; ask questions; talk it out with the recognition that everyone is coming to the table with different backgrounds, skills, areas of knowledge, flaws, fears, and hopes. They will not be perfect, and neither do you have to be. The Trainee wants its characters and its audience to find the courage, like Ryan and Jane, Ba Mhee and Tae, or the lovely moments between Pah and all his coworkers this week, to speak up with curiosity and openness.

Then, the next step it shows so wonderfully is how you can appreciate what complexities you contributed to the situation. You can acknowledge and apologize for your role once you understand it—not because you are wrong or right, but because acknowledgement and sorries are ways to show other people that you didn’t find a way to help avoid the problem either that time. It’s important to note, as I see some discourse rising up about who apologizes in the conversations during the show, that Thai and Broader Asian cultures in general have a VERY different culture around apologies, humility, and shame so that those feelings and their related gestures are used to build connection and positive feelings, compared to negative shame in Western culture; book rec if your interested in that topic and more—Between Us: How Cultures Create Emotions.

The show doesn’t have some moral argument to say about a systemic HR issue at this office. It also doesn’t depict its office as devoid of deeply troubling systemic issues like sexual harassment. Its recommendation to address the issues, though, is not through stricter enforcement of rules or the perfecting of one’s behavior. It’s to communicate when the time is right on with self-respect and compassion.

There is just so much love and care in every element of the Trainee, and I already know it’s gonna be a comfort show to return to again and again in the future because it’s intricately produced tone and its story just release the tangled knots of perfectionism in me without discouraging me from my desire to grow and improve. You can just tell it’s done by people who love their jobs and their work environment. How rare to see a workplace in media be simultaneously so realistic in its depiction and still so positive about the overall experience 🌻

[real-fire-emblem-takes]

Is this where we send the takes? If so, I have one from FEH that might be unpopular.

Læraðr is a better Embla.

Look, on the surface they are stoic characters with white hair with a penchant for murder. But Læraðr actually has a very complex backstory where we see he was genuinely a good person. He held back against the king for so long for the benefit of his loved ones. He held out against his evil urges for so long for the benefit of OTHERS. He doesn’t have his traits played off as cute tropes. He doesn’t have anyone apologize for him or make excuses. He is sympathetic without needing an explanation, but also a villain that needs to be stopped.

With Embla, she was shown to be a tyrant even before the murder attempt, when she got pissy after mortals went to Askr. They went there because according to Askr they valued “open exchange”. Then she isolated her people and kept them from ever leaving. She even brainwashed them! Think of families who could have been separated, never to see each other again because of a goddess who makes Hera look like an anti-war protestor! Her villain origin story is people leaving. That’s it.

We have Askr shown to make excuses for her like “she was deeply hurt”, “I cannot begin to imagine her pain”, “she cared so deeply about mortals once” Even though he resolves to aid the fight against her he is ridiculously sympathetic considering the evil things she’s done and he KNOWS she’s done. Admittedly, I really hate how IS handled Askr in this. And I also can’t stand the tsundere treatment she gets which was amplified in the bridal banner.

Also, Læraðr would have been a better couple with Askr. Heck Askr is the only other deity to come from Yggdrasil as stated in the story! At least Læraðr was a good person once. The way Askr described Embla, she seemed like she was one minute away from indulging in her wickedness. She was “good” based on the convenience of her surroundings, not because she was truly a good person.

.

[g0nta-g0kuhara]

The Chapter 4 Essay Part 2: Gonta Gokuhara

A metapost on my thoughts on Kokichi’s overall motivations and Gonta’s actions during ch4. Split into two parts. You can find Kokichi's half here: (LINK)

This section is admittedly a little bit shorter than Kokichi’s, but that’s just because Gonta’s motivations are a lot more clear than Kokichi’s. That being said, I’m also worried that since I am so obsessed with Gonta I might forget something important that supports my point because to me its kinda self-evident. So if anything seems like it’s missing or doesn’t make sense, please let me know!

In my opinion, nothing Kokichi did to Gonta was personal, in both positive and negative ways. He didn’t target Gonta because he hated him in particular, but he also didn’t team up with him because they were already friends. Gonta was just an easy target for him to take advantage of, both for stopping Miu from killing him And in progressing his plan to stop the killing game. Gonta’s actions in chapter 4 are a combination of genuine manipulation by Kokichi using what made him an easy target, and motivation caused by Gonta’s desperation and preexisting insecurities that had been growing since the start of the killing game.

Throughout v3, the one thing that Gonta wants more than anything else is to protect his friends from the killing game. It’s pretty clear that he trusts his physical strength more than any other part of himself. The literal First thing Gonta says in a group setting with everyone else is this:

(prologue)

He doesn’t even know anyone yet! But he’s already prepared to physically defend them from the exisals! He also tries to stop Kaede’s execution along with Kaito and Tenko:

(post trial, chapter 1) (And- wait- is Gonta missing his bug box in this cg? Oh my god….)

Gonta is shown to be most confident when doing things that involve his physical strength. There’s less hesitation and uncertainty in his actions, unlike what you can often see in him during class trials or group discussions.

Gonta is also more than willing to give up his life for his friends, even as early as chapter 2.

(post trial, chapter 2) (he’s the first one to make this suggestion)

Outside of physical defense against active threats, Gonta really just wants to help his friends in any way he can. Here’s a couple examples:

(post-trial, chapter 1) (daily life, chapter 2) (daily life, chapter 3) (investigation, chapter 3)

On the other hand, Gonta has really bad self esteem issues. It’s telling enough that one of Gonta’s common floatlines is literally “Gonta idiot…” When he’s not casually calling himself dumb he’s apologizing for it. For this (and honestly, many other parts of Gonta’s character that I’m pointing out here) I really recommend just paying close attention to Gonta on a replay of the game. I could literally sit here for a week finding and listing all the times Gonta calls himself stupid, but it feels pretty self-evident considering how much he does it. Here’s just one example:

(investigation, chapter 1)

It’s the combination of his deep desire to be helpful and protect the people around him, and the repeated deaths of his classmates, that really start to wear on him as the game progresses. I think this mixes with his already present self worth issues to form a pretty nasty complex; Gonta explicitly blames himself for almost every single victim’s death in the game. Let’s walk through the chapters for a moment here:

Ryoma: “Gonta coulda saved him… No, Gonta shoulda saved him…! // When piranhas attack Ryoma… If Gonta had dived into tank… / Then… Gonta coulda help Ryoma. But Gonta got scared. Too scared to do anything. / Sorry! Gonta really sorry!”

In chapter 3, Gonta joins Angie’s student council out of his desire to protect everyone. This is made clear in how, before pulling him in, Angie compliments Gonta and calls him smart. She then says this:

(daily life, chapter 3)

This time, organized as a part of the student council and with Angie’s god on his side, Gonta hopes that he can finally be useful and successfully protect someone.

Angie: “Maybe Angie got attacked while she sleep in her room, and get brought there? / If so… Gonta coulda saved her! If only Gonta saw! / But Gonta was sleeping… Sorry, Angie… Gonta no could save you!”

…To quote my favourite V3 lets play (shortonegaming) on this moment: “He made up a version [of Angie’s death] so that he could blame himself.”

Tenko: “T-Tenko…! Gonta so sorry… Gonta no could protect you!” and then a little later “It’s all Gonta’s fault…! Gonta fail to protect friends again!” and AGAIN later “Gonta so ashamed…! Why Gonta no could protect friends!?”

That’s two deaths in a row that Gonta (at least believes) he was right next door to and failed to stop. You can see from how he says this repeatedly, with lots of dialogue from other characters in between, the sheer amount that this is impacting him.

Miu: “But… why this happen…!? Why… Miu killed!? / Gonta not understand… Gonta not understand anything… /…But Gonta frustrated and sad! Gonta no could protect Miu! // Gonta so sorry! Gonta sorry he no could protect Miu!” Even with Miu’s death, to which he’s waking up disoriented and confused, he blames himself for failing to stop it.

(Sidenote: Looking at all these reactions back to back makes Gonta’s disorientation after waking up from the virtual world SO much more visible. I left the beginning out of the quote I took, but when you first talk to him during ch4’s investigation, he doesn’t say anything for a few moments. This is very unlike his immediate, intense reactions in the earlier chapters. When he does start speaking it feels kind of disjointed, uncharacteristically calm, and confused before he starts riling himself up blaming himself for Miu’s death. I never really noticed it before looking into this. It’s kind of disturbing)

The only reason I personally think he doesn’t react this way about Rantaro immediately is due to being in shock that someone died to begin with. That doesn’t stop him from saying this not long after:

(investigation, chapter 1)

This complex- made of the desire to protect everyone, self loathing, and feelings of uselessness at being unable to help investigating due to being “stupid” and failing to protect anyone physically, the only thing he thinks he’s good at, every. single. time- only gets worse with each chapter. And in Chapter 4, Gonta finally reaches his breaking point.

At the beginning of Chapter 4, you can talk to Gonta as Shuichi is leaving to meet up with Kaito and Maki to train. He tries to stop Shuichi, worried about a murder potentially taking place at night (again), but Shuichi reassures him that he’ll stick by his friends and that he can’t break his promise to meet up with them. Gonta responds like this:

(daily life, chapter 4)

Which leads to him saying he’s made up his mind, and has a plan. Which is, of course, to try and take down Monokuma physically, even if it costs him his life. He initially drops the suggestion after Miu starts talking about the virtual world, but the day after, it’s still bothering him.

(daily life, chapter 4)

Almost every free time event you have with Gonta this chapter (except for like, one, where he talks about the “tiny bugs” he can barely see), Gonta is trying to think of ways to help.

(free time, chapter 4) His last possible free time event before Miu takes everyone into the virtual world has this dialogue, which is just so sad to me.

(free time, chapter 4)

“Helping everyone” and not being “useless” are almost the only two things Gonta talks about this chapter. It’s this mindset and motivation that made Gonta an easy target for Kokichi to take advantage of. He’s in a bad place mentally, and nothing he does seems to help anybody. Not to mention, with the student council gone, he’s suddenly just kind of… alone. There’s no one there (other than potentially Shuichi, during free time) to keep him steady.

And yeah, I am definitely not including Kokichi here. A strong reason I don’t think Gonta chose to go along with Kokichi out of friendship was because of this interaction early Chapter 4:

(daily life, chapter 4)

Gonta’s trust in Kokichi was broken because of the events of the insect meet and greet. The insect meet and greet’s implications for Kokichi and Gonta’s relationship are a bit strange, but since it’s not super relevant to chapter 4, I’m not gonna get into it. The point is, regardless of the nature of their relationship in chapter 2, it’s clear that Gonta doesn’t consider Kokichi a very trustworthy person in chapter 4. It’s likely that he doesn’t consider him a close friend either. I hesitate to say that Gonta didn’t consider him a friend at all, because he’s Gonta and he wants to have faith in everyone, but at the very least he was trying to be wary around him.

This explicit distrust in Kokichi might make it seem strange that Gonta went along with Kokichi at all in the virtual world. But in reality, Kokichi was very aware of Gonta’s distrust in him, and used it to his advantage in setting up his plot.

(daily life, chapter 4) (I skipped some dialogue in this exchange, but it hits the main points)

Kaito inadvertently eggs Gonta on here, but Kokichi literally drops the idea at Gonta’s feet. Gonta isn’t going with Kokichi to help him look, he’s going to make sure he doesn’t get into any trouble. And as Kokichi said, he knew Gonta would offer to do something like this if given the chance.

Kokichi uses Gonta’s distrust in him again when they encounter the flashback light holding the secret of the outside world together. Gonta’s immediate instinct was to go find everyone else, but Kokichi yells for him to wait, and then this happens:

(post trial, chapter 4)

He KNOWS Gonta doesn’t trust him, and with that distrust, he can make him doubt anything he says. I’ve already talked about how Gonta is ready to give up his life for everyone else, especially this chapter, so suggesting that he check if the light is a trap set up by Kokichi is guaranteed to make Gonta pause.

But it doesn’t stop there. Kokichi pushes harder:

(post trial, chapter 4)

Gonta thinks for a moment, but this is what made him choose to come back and look at the flashback light himself. Here, Kokichi uses the thing that has been haunting Gonta more than anything else all killing game, especially this chapter. He knows Gonta has tried and failed to protect people, he knows how upset it makes him. What better way would there be to convince him to do whatever he wants than to offer a way for him to finally be “useful” to everyone after failing them again and again?

Anything after this point and before Miu’s body discovery is purely headcanon, so I won’t get into my thoughts on that. But I think this moment shows that Gonta was under a lot more control that people often think. I don’t mean to say that Kokichi is entirely blameless, or that Gonta wasn’t manipulated at all. But AlterEgo!Gonta says himself, “No, [we] not tricked,” because he wasn’t. He made the choice to see the secret of the outside world on his own, and made every choice after that to continue with their plan. There was no trickery involved. It was Kokichi’s carefully chosen words that dug right into his insecurities, doubts, and hopes that directly influenced him into making the choice that he did.

You also have to keep in mind how absolutely unstable Gonta must’ve been at this point. He was already nearing a breaking point with his feelings of powerlessness before going into the virtual world, but then he got hit with the secret of the outside world. AlterEgo!Gonta openly admits that it made him feel suicidal. (“Cuz, when Gonta remember the secret of the outside world, Gonta think… /…it would be easier… to die.”) With the outside world and the killing game both inescapable hells, Gonta just couldn’t imagine any way out. And then Kokichi suggests the mercy kill plan. In his state of mind, Gonta truly believed that this could be the way to finally “save” everyone.

Of course, Kokichi had only just recently seen the secret of the outside world too. Even though he must have known it wasn’t true, he had no idea the extent to which it was a lie versus the truth. He probably wasn’t in a very good mental state either. But still, just like he would do again in chapter 5 to everyone else, Kokichi used the despair caused by the secret of the outside world to get Gonta to go along with his plan.

This is what I believe was the driving force behind Gonta’s half of the Kokichi and Gonta dynamic in chapter 4. Gonta’s self loathing, which was present before the killing game began, compounded with his desire to be useful and protect everyone else from the threats of the killing game. As more people died, Gonta became more and more desperate to do literally anything to help everyone else. Kokichi used these things about Gonta to push him to do what he wanted him to.

…To close off, there’s this moment right before Gonta and Kokichi leave to kill Miu that’s really stuck with me.

(daily life, chapter 4) (Read left to right, top to bottom)

It’s not common for the other characters to defend Gonta’s intelligence. But Kaito, unknowingly, says just the right thing to Gonta at just the wrong time. Knowing that Gonta was about to set things in motion to mercy kill everyone for this exact reason… I wonder if Kaito remembered this moment. Maybe it was just another reason he got so defensive over him during trial 4. I just wish he had said something like this to him sooner.

If you got all the way here and read all this… first of all. THANK YOU! Oh my god. I’ve been working on this essay for several days now between studying for my finals. It feels really great to have it all written out after literal years of loving V3 and loving this chapter. Please, please, please let me know your thoughts! Even if you disagree with me! Chapter 4 is so special to me and I love talking about it!! o/

(Screenshots taken on youtube from justonegamr, Bittersweet Gamers, ShortOneGaming, ProZD Plays Games, and my own copy of v3 on IOS. Thank you @/ishimaruhourglass for helping me find some of these!)