#also that friend of who the pandemic really didn't bring out the best in her

[fairycosmos]

hi, just curious if you're able to answer this, what happened with becca? currently struggling with a sibling with addiction issues and wanted to get some perspective

she'd been on and off drugs experimentally/recreationally since she was like 17, but when the pandemic hit in 2020 she spiralled very quickly over the course of a few months into addiction which was worsened by her dating (and moving the guy into our house) another person struggling with severe addiction. we tried to kick him out when she got bad but they basically went out onto the streets together so we had to let them back in. to make a long story much shorter she was on a lot more shit than we realised, she choked in her sleep on aug 25 2020 and had a cardiac arrest. cpr didn't help, her shitty boyfriend didn't help, nothing helped. it was too late basically. all of this is messed up and blurry in my head so there's much more to it than that but that's the gist of it. in the weeks leading up i tried tirelessly to talk to her about it, mostly over text even though we were all living in the same house but in seperate rooms due to covid at the time. i would send her these big walls of text about how this wasn't right and how bad things were and she would agree but basically just mollify me, lie to me etc though i do believe that having those conversations was nessecary. just letting her know that i understand, that i'm here, that i know she's scared and in immense pain but that we can make small steps in the right direction together etc. while also being almost harsh and upfront about the harm she is causing and the way she was hurting herself and everyone around her. she had a doctor's appointment booked the week after she died to talk about the drugs and i do think she intended on going, but she was just such a mess. i don't have any concrete advice because it felt so hopeless at the time, talking to her was like talking to a brick wall. i was so fucking angry and upset about her situation and the way she was that it was hard to even interact with her sometimes. the spiral was so fast with her and that made it so difficult to guage what to do. but if you can continue talking to them on a human level, bringing up examples of their recent behaviour that has crossed the line, pushing for the idea of seeing a professional/local addiction resources or hotlines, then that's all you can do. i know how hard this is on you too and i know it is a special type of exhausting and endless hell to love an addict. all you can do is try your best not to facilliate the addiction while doing what you can to support getting them into recovery. there are a lot of addiction centers, support groups and hotlines that offer advice and support for loved ones - i would really encourage you to seek those out for more professional and exstensive guidance. i really hope they get clean eventually and i reall hope you're taking care of yourself and being kind with yourself throughout this whole thing. i'm really sorry it's happening to you, your sibling and your family. please know i'm here if you ever need a friend or someone to vent to about it. x

supporting someone with addiction / how to help an addict without enabling / helping someone who is misusing drugs or alcohol/ info about interventions / how to help a friend or family member with addiction / tips for supporting someone recovering from addiction/overcoming drug addiction

[butmakeitgayblog]

Can you Tell us the story about how you met your wife and got together? I know It was somehow Clexa related, pretty please ;)

Oh Sam's not actually my wife 😅 we're not married and probably will never get married. Between us both being the products of divorce (and unhappy marriages prior to that involving parents who stayed together way too long), plus with my whole health issues thing and maybe ending up needing to be on disability down the road, we just decided to shelve that whole notion for the foreseeable future, possibly forever. But in spirit she is, a piece of paper isn't needed. I mean she buys me rotisserie chickens 🥹

Anyway yeah!

So shortly before the pandemic hit I was going out to dinner with a group of friends and one of them asked if she could bring her cousin along. She said her cousin had recently moved down into the area for work and didn't really know anybody else and so, ya know, it'll give her a chance to socialize. We all met up and it was nice and I'm thinking hmm she's cute but also pretty quiet and kinda stoic and probably straight so it was like meh whatever she's alright I guess 🥴. But then during dinner I was eating something that everyone knew would make me feel icky and I said something along the lines of like, "Eh fuck it, victory stands on the back of sacrifice, right?" Fully thinking no one would pick up on it because I knew no one else there had ever watched the show.

But then miss thang's head shot up like 😳

Nobody else having caught this reference, we spend the next several seconds having a silent

moment across the table 🥴

She said I turned both white as a sheet and then fire engine fuckin red😅😅😅 (I have a very real blushing problem. It's the cross I bear that comes with the chubby cheeks, r.i.p.)

After that she started joining in the convo more and actually coming out of her shell. We started kind of having our own side convo just between us and when the check came everyone else decided to call it a night but we stayed behind and had another drink at the bar. We ended up staying till right about closing, and then exchanged numbers and decided to ~hang out~ the next day ~just us~.

For the conversation, obviously.

And that was kind of that. We saw each other pretty much every day after that and text constantly and called each other every night before bed if we weren't staying over together. At first Iiiiiii had a *moment* of panic of not really knowing what we were because it just went from not knowing she existed to having her be kind of the focal point of my life, but she was kind enough to just be like "🙄+😏+🤦‍♀️ we're dating, Andi. We've been dating. That's what we are. Don't hurt yourself there, champ."

So kudos to her for that...

It was tough during the beginning stages of the pandemic because she has family that is very high risk and so do I, both of which if they got it they'd probably die, so quarantine and social distancing was rough but necessary, but we worked through it and both feel more solid for it. And now we live together and she helps me take care of my mother and myself and I do my best to be her support and help her and be her best cheerleader whenever I can 🥹

Downside tho is I'll forever be labeled "Cousin Fucker" in my friend's phone contacts 😒

[usedpidemo]

so i went to my first ever concert and...(storytime!)

Generally speaking, I don't like the concept of concerts. For the longest time, I've never had any interest in attending one. I've been disillusioned by the idea of them as a whole, with no disrespect to people who attend them. Even before the global pandemic that shut down live events, ironically, despite being on my headphones/speakers 90% of the time, I don't like crowds and extremely loud audiences. It also doesn't help that many live artists nowadays are just not good stage performers or lipsync or in some cases, aren't as pleasing to hear as the studio mix that I could easily play on Spotify. My mantra, which has always been my mother's as well, was "Just listen to the CD." This also explains why I don't really buy CDs anymore and stick to streaming instead.

It's now 2023, and as the old adage goes, things change. I've become a K-pop fan, live events are back, and there's this push to have me leave my house a lot more than I should. I'm no recluse like Bruce Wayne, but I certainly don't like going out when I could be relaxing and playing video games in my spare time even as an adult. Growing up made me realize that there's plenty of things that I should do, even at least once. I'm nowhere close to dying—I think so at least—but I definitely felt the need add some spice into my life and have some fresh memories to keep now that the pandemic's over.

Anyway—I've never been to a concert, and my older sister's only concert experience was seeing Fall Out Boy when she was in her teens that she desperately begged mom to see, and she was all the way up into the nosebleeds. Now obviously I can't go and see IZ*ONE anymore (sadblob) and every big act carries extremely large demand for them. My sister failed to secure Blackpink tickets for their tour even with the membership presale, and the experience was so frustrating and damning that she stopped listening to the group for a while. There's so many things that can go wrong even as early as ticket sales, so I understood that any concert I wanted to go to should be absolutely worth it.

It was during our vacation back in February when IVE announced that they would be bringing their fan concert around Asia, with June as the set date. I can remember seeing it trend on Twitter while waiting in the car; the hype was fucking real. I knew I had to be there by any means necessary. The campaign began as soon as we got back to our hotel. They said yes.

One thing I want to say is: fuck online ticketing. It sucks, big time. Anything that can go wrong, can and will go wrong. Yet some part of me was so uncertain and wanted to test the murky waters again. I got in touch with a third party way before they announced the ticket selling date, and I was so fixated on the success rate of the seller, against the advice of my family. It wasn't until two days before ticket selling that I was given a proper talk, saying that it could be a potential scam and that I should camp out the night before to get the best chances. Ultimately, I gave in and settled at a hotel close to a hotel without many fans. They ended up being right. I ended up first in line and got the best package for a little over $200. It was so difficult to keep my composure the moment I got the tickets all the way till I got home.

Fast forward to a little over a month. The family also booked me a nice hotel close to the venue days before the show so we wouldn't have to face insufferable traffic. I couldn't sleep the night before the show—not because I was excited and all, but I was genuinely feeling restless. It ultimately didn't matter as my mood and overall energy never diminished once I woke up 2.5 hours after finally sleeping.

You just know it's gonna be a good day when the first sign is making new friends out of nowhere. At breakfast, I befriended two Japanese tourists for some reason. My smile was wider than it normally was. It's so weird greeting people with amped up optimism that at times, it felt like main character energy, which was typically uncharacteristic of me. Mind you, I only had 2.5 hours of sleep.

An hour later, venue time—at least close to it. The concert organizers and local fanclubs held a fanhub that was already filling up the floor with a line that stretched around in a loop. So I bailed and went to the cafe across the street from where the actual concert would happen to get free shit. Saved myself almost $25 dollars from buying the I'VE IVE album because of a cupsleeve event being organized by a remnant of WIZ*ONEs. A big W if you ask me.

I even met up with some of my readers too! Cray and Nomad, if you're reading this, it was great finally meeting you. It was awesome to fanboy and connect with guys I've been talking to online for the past two years in person.

Afterward, we went inside an hour before show start, and people were already screaming like they showed up and it was just staff bringing out towels and water bottles. Then the lights went out and holy shit, everyone lost their shit. It wasn't a sold-out show but the audience's energy made it feel otherwise. They were singing instead of following fan-chants.

It should surprise no one that everyone killed it. Yujin is the 4th gen ace and no one can tell me any different. Wonyoung was absolutely fantastic in crowd control and drawing the audience in and lived up to the center title. They added both title tracks from I'VE IVE and changed up two of the cover songs for the unit stages, otherwise the set remains mostly similar to the ones in Korea and Japan, the only difference being new outfits and alternate color ones.

I'm gonna dedicate this section specifically for Liz. Consider me bias wrecked. She was not only an elite vocalist but she performed like the rent was due, holy shit. Blue Blood (my favorite stage of the night) in particular really gripped me and never let go. I was genuinely shook at how terrific she showed out in the performances. If anything, she's the 2nd best performer of the group after watching the footage.

There was an emotional moment at the end as the show was winding down. The members were lined up for the group photo when a fan video played and half of the members cried. Leeseo, Rei, and Yujin all cried and it was a wholesome scene. Rei mentioned how this was one of their first performances as a full group following her health hiatus and she was moved by the overwhelming support of the fans. Wonyoung also promised they would return—hopefully later than sooner I'm not loaded at the moment—which invalidates the stupid argument international Dives were having on Twitter. The girls felt their support, cried their heart out, and that's all you need to know.

After the event, there was a hi-bye session for all VIP ticket holders. They sent everyone else out, so it started 20 minutes after the actual ending. They kept reminding us that we weren't allowed to record or take photos of the event, but apparently someone at Starship was filming the whole thing? So there's a possibility that I might end up on YouTube, heh. Since we were on the left side of the stage, we were among the last to go up and meet them.

Holy fuck dude. I wasn't nervous while watching everyone else go up and meet IVE, but once the staff told us to form a single line and we slowly made our way around the stage, my heart began to go buckwild. You just don't know what to say or do when that moment comes—like how do I make this memorable or at the very least, not cringe? One thing I do know was that we all agreed, as a section, to walk past them as slow as humanly possible; five seconds was not enough. I was so unsure of what to do as I slowly walked up the steps to the point I was practically mouthing 'Jesus take the wheel' or else I'd melt into a puddle, lose my shit, do something stupid, or maybe all of the above.

Jesus Christ. They looked so fucking flawless. You honestly couldn't tell they were sweaty and exhausted after performing for 2.5 hours.

From left to right, it was Rei, Gaeul, Wonyoung, Yujin, Leeseo, and Liz. Liz was the first member I met, and she completed my half-heart gesture. From there, my brain blanked for a good three seconds. My mouth was still uttering 'Kamsahamnida' but that scene seemed to stick long past that moment. I couldn't register Leeseo, Yujin, and Wonyoung's reactions—I knew they were smiling and waving—but then my brain suddenly went back up as I met Gaeul and Rei's eyes right as we made our way out. I went to the bathroom and uttered a relieved, awestruck 'Holy shit.'

God. I don't know if I will ever move on from such an experience. I'm still thinking about the interaction as I write this little thought diary, and my mind keeps replaying the interactions with Liz, Gaeul, and Rei. All of them had lovely smiles and were so happy even though they clearly were gassed out, and I was in utter shock trying to comprehend what had happened. Famous streamer IShowSpeed met his hero Ronaldo the same day as the concert and if you've seen his video, he practically plays out all the emotions I wanted to feel after meeting them. I've not played any K-pop after the concert aside from English versions of songs and most certainly I've avoided IVE songs aside from rewatching my concert fancams because I'll just melt into a giddy pile of goo watching it, telling myself 'I was there.'

My sister only listens to Blackpink. She agreed to take me to the venue provided I buy her tickets, so this was a consolation or redemption of sorts after failing to secure tickets for the Born Pink tour. She's a Dive now. She couldn't stop raving over Wonyoung's beauty but she eventually found all the members to be cute and beautiful. It feels great to finally share a sweet moment with my sister despite the turbulent relationship we have.

In an ideal world, I'll be watching Le sserafim and the other IZ*ONE members when they perform/arrive here. Of course, there's many obstacles in the way, and I'm not loaded with disposable income. Seriously, these tickets were more expensive than a veteran group and they're supposed to be rookies! But the entire experience—the energy, the performances, and the ending—made every coin I spent worth it. If this ends up becoming the only concert I attend in my entire life moving forward, I'm glad it was an unforgettable one.

Gaeul, Yujin, Rei, Wonyoung, Liz, and Leeseo, thank you for making my year and giving me a core memory I can fondly look back on. I fucking love you guys.

[unstableblond]

story time about how my older sister is a horrible person lol

my sister was always irresponsible and never really cared about anything other than MEN

she literally abandoned her children because of men because her life was destroyed by herself because of this obsession with men, and the funny thing is that all the men she ever dated were all insane and just as broke as she was

her daughter's father took his daughter to live with him because my sister was clearly not a good mother, there was even one time when she went out drinking and trying to k herself while her children were with her, which is completely crazy and disgusting of her!! she literally didn't even care about the trauma it caused her children and all this because of a damn man

i remember the night i took care of my cousin and it broke my heart to see her crying and i spent the whole time trying to calm her down..and it makes me angry how she was taken away from us..she was not only a cousin but also a best friend to me

in the final months of 2021 i found out that my sister's boyfriend hit her and i knew this only because i heard her conversation with my mom, my blood started bubbling when i heard this and i wanted so bad to destroy this guy..she broke up with him later and then one day we had a conversation together and she swore to me that she would never go back with that man but at the same time she said that she missed him ugh i said it's normal to feel attached to a person but no matter what she shouldn't get back together with him, she promised me, but a while after that i found out that she got back together with him AND IT MADE ME SO INSANELY ANGRY i swear!! i never felt so mad as i felt that day.. but she is an adult woman and we cannot control her choices but only advise so there was nothing we could do..i told to mom that if my sister wants to keep that monster then ok but i didn't want her to bring that monster close to our family and she agreed but after a few months my mother and i moved to a new address and guess what 💀 she came to my new house to help and brought that damn man and I literally freaked out and started screaming saying a lot of things to him and her

i screamed loudly that i didn't want him in my house or near my family or i would report him to the police for abusing my sister and this bastard left with my sister who got mad at me for literally making getting mad at her for getting back together with her abuser 💀 she really thought i would be smiling, jumping, and dropping flowers when i see that she was back with her abuser bffr

she has stolen money from my mom many times throughout her life without even asking permission and she always did that with my mom's clothes too

in addition to dating broke and unstable men, she tries to bring them into our lives to become our problem too because she wants to destroy our lives just like she did with her own

we don't want to meet your new boyfriends who literally always have the same pattern among themselves and always end in the worst way possible so stop bringing them to our homes girl

she thinks she's always right and when someone scolds her for her behavior she acts like she's 14 it's funny how pissed off she gets because we're always right and she's wrong but she doesn't accept that

at the beginning of the pandemic, she literally moved to live with us and her damn boyfriend, a different man than the one i mentioned minutes ago, but he was as sh*t as any other man she had ever dated..and it was literally a big hell in our lives having to put up with her and her boyfriend plus she also had her other two children living with us in a house that wasn't even that big 💀 every day i woke up and wished i was de@d because living there was unbearable

this guy was very obese, in addition to being obese he also had problems with his legs and had to walk with the support of something

i was so stressed out that he was always walking around at the speed of a turtle and i couldn't even walk past him because his body was LITERALLY taking up all the space there was

she had to bring her damn man with her to destroy our lives for a whole 1 or 2 years

the craziest thing of all is that my mom had to work and pay for everything for my sister and her useless boyfriend who did nothing but lay around

and in the end even though he could barely move he cheated on her and that makes me laugh every time i remember it

she even dated a guy who destroyed her entire house, tried to str@ngle her and even threatened her and brought him into our house putting us at risk because this guy was literally insane and could k us all because of her

i know that after i'm no longer here she or her children may try to defame me to make me look like a horrible person just to alleviate their mistakes that are being exposed by me rn lol i just want to make it clear that if you say anything bad about me and make up lies i swear i will come back as a vengeful spirit and ruin each and every one of your lives (oops i forgot..her life is already ruined lol but maybe i can make it worse) we all know you are a liar and a terrible person and unfortunately your children are the same, don't try me girl.

[purplesurveys]

1785

Do you know a James? I have a second cousin named James! He lives in New Zealand, though, and only visits home every few years. I first met him when he was a few weeks old, then the next time he was already like 10. I haven't seen him again since and I'm guessing he'll be in college or whatever the third time they come back to the Philippines.

Have you ever been to Australia? If not, would you like to? I haven't and I'd love to, but tbh it's also not really at the top of my list. I'm not really sure what I'd want to see/experience there.

Have you ever been diagnosed with a mental illness? Haven't been diagnosed but I'm sure I have one or two hanging out in my head lol.

If you had to choose to have a different accent than the one you have now, what accent would you choose and why? Idk, I'm fine with the accent I have.

New York or California? New York, easily.

Have you ever or do you currently live in a Gated Community? I do and always have.

Who was your last text from? An incredibly late automated OTP that I don't even need anymore.

Do you know how to use a DSLR camera? Yes, I owned one as a teenager. Tumblr made photography this super hip hipster thing in the early 2010s lol and it made me beg my dad to get me a DSLR camera, even though I didn't have a clue how to use one. Long story short I found photography boring and I ultimately passed the camera to my sister, who ended up as the one into arts.

If you had to choose one instrument to perfect, what instrument would you choose? Piano.

Have you ever owned an Axolotl? Nope.

What has been the longest amount of time you’ve spent on a plane? Bali was around 4 hours. As much as I'd love to travel the rest of the world, those 20+ hour flights PLUS LAYOVERS sound dreadful.

How often do you use Snapchat? Whoa. I haven't used Snapchat since college, around 2017ish. I remember Angela and I trying to bring it back when the pandemic had *just* started but it didn't catch on.

What does your last text say? It's just an automated message that sent me an OTP.

Have you ever played Habbo? I saw the ads like a million times but never played it.

What about Runescape? Nope.

Have you ever heard of the band Mumford & Sons? If yes, do you like their music? I have, but I've never heard anything of theirs.

Have you ever kissed anyone starting with the letter A, C, N, T or K? No.

Have you ever used Valium before? I have not.

What time is it where you’re from? 11:39 PM.

Have you ever adopted an animal from an animal shelter? Yes, Arlee was from PAWS.

Where do you usually find Surveys from? On my dash. I used to look for surveys on Bzoink, but there was a period this year where I couldn't take surveys for a couple of weeks and by the time I came back there were tons of new, interesting ones on my dash. Ever since then I've always just been playing catch-up on my feed and I haven't opened Bzoink in months now.

Australia or New Zealand? Tbh I'd rather save the money lolol I honestly don't know which one to pick and I don't find either worth the visa hassle. I guess if anything uh New Zealand? then go to the spots BTS visited from Bon Voyage hah.

Have you ever missed a flight? Never.

What is your best friend’s middle name? I'm not sharing that.

How do you feel about the passing of Aretha Franklin? I was shocked, but it didn't affect me heavily.

Did you enjoy any of her music? Can't say I was a passionate fan of her music. It's just not something I was regularly exposed to so I've been largely unfamiliar for the most part.

What is your favourite film from your childhood? Toy Story and it's still my favorite kids' movie.

Kanye West or Drake? If we're doing brutal honesty I'd go with Kanye but all the shit he's said and done equally cancels him out, so I'll go with Drake by default lol.

Do you know anyone who is named after a state? I used to work with a girl named Jersey, if that counts.

What was the reason for your previous doctor’s visit? Shots for a dog bite.

Have you ever been to an outdoor cinema? Nope. Too hot and too many flies LOL.

Have you ever had a “bad trip”? If yes, what happened? Idk if this even counts as one because I blacked out so quickly it was almost embarrassing, but what happened was I took a big puff of that cannabis vape thing after already having downed a ton of alcohol and the next thing I knew I was on my knees in the restroom and then finally carried back to my bed.

How often do you use Instagram? Everyday. I post at least one story a day; my in-feed posts are few and far between though and I only do posts if something super significant happens.

Have you ever smoked a cigarette? Yeah, a few times. It's not something I look for and I haven't done it since before the pandemic.

If so, do you still smoke? Nopes.

What are you up to tomorrow? It's my last working day before our office closes down for the holidays so while I'll be at work I'll be in a pretty damn jolly mood hahaha.

What type of questions do you like being asked during a survey? I like random questions that require more thought. It can be boring encountering what-color-is-your-blahblah all the time, and it also turns me away if questions are too hypothetical/philosophical.

Adam Sandler or Jim Carrey? Adam Sandler.

What is your favourite Ben Stiller movie? I don't have one.

What is your favourite Spotify playlist if you have one? I made a playlist called 'it's raining purple' which are essentially BTS tracks I think are perfect for when it's raining and I open my windows to let the colder air in.

Outside of playlists I've made, I have two favorites – one called 'the tannies love you' which compiles all of BTS' fan songs; and 'standing next to you' which is an SNTY-focused playlist mixed in with a bunch of Michael Jackson songs.

Firefox or Chrome? Chrome.

Do you enjoy learning about conspiracy theories? They're fun to read, yeah! You don't have to believe them; they're just stories to spice up what we already know hahaha. I was obsessed with the Avril Lavigne doppelganger case for a time.

If so, what is your favourite? ^ Oh, well that one.

Do you find hand tattoos attractive on your preferred sex? Depends on the tattoo design/style.

If you had a baby boy, what would you name him? I've always been indecisive about a main name, but I'd love for their second name to be Owen after Owen Hart.

What is your favourite Netflix original series? Is Black Mirror considered one? Let's go with that.

Have you ever owned a Tamagotchi? No, too expensive. I had bootleg ones which were just as fun :)

Do you have a favourite “survey blog” on Tumblr? If so, who? I like everyone! :) Would you rather be 10 minutes late or 20 minutes early? Depends on the situation. If it's a super super super big event with like 1,000 people and my presence doesn't matter, I'd honestly much rather be late. Otherwise I'm always early.

If you could be a member of any TV-Sitcom family, which would it be? Perfect Strangers. Would love to finally be fluent in Myposian.

Tell me about the 6th person in your contact list: College orgmate and ultimately became part of the same friend group in college. Haven't seen her in years. Terrific writer, loves cats, unfortunately shares the exact same music taste as my ex so I always shudder when she shares her song recos. Has curly hair, lives in the south, remains to be one of the few people genuinely interested in journalism and I respect her for that. Great sense of style. I miss Blanch!

Are you waiting for a text back right now? Nope.

Would you rather be able to control fire or water? Water.

[meeko-goes-exploring]

Introducing Myself

Hiya! As this is the very first post, I thought it better than any to make it all about ME! lol just kidding, this is Meeko's world and I'm just the chauffeur.

Meeko (often referred to as Meeks, Bubbas, Sweet boy, or The Puppers) is a Golden Doodle born Dec. 11, 2019 in Midland, Texas. He came home with me in February the following year so technically that doesn't count as a Pandemic Puppy, but he lived that pandemic puppy life. After 2 months of having him, his whole world consisted of just him and me. When the bulk of the pandemic was over and life at work went back to normal, he was not okay with it BUT traveling was safe and okay again, so his world got much bigger! My late teens, early 20s I was fortunate enough to travel Europe. Mostly on my own (less of a hassle to bring others along, get to go where I wanted when I wanted and do what i wanted) and I had the time of my life! The time came when I had to move back to the States, and it was SCARY! I had lived in Germany for 13 years; my whole life was about to be turned upside down. For a while I stayed in the city I moved to, spending much needed time with family, who normally only got to see me a few weeks out of the summer and had to share me with other family in other states. So, a few weeks for me but only a few days for each of them. Anyways life got boring pretty fast for me. That travel bug just kept biting. Most of my family have lived where they live for YEARS. So, I traveled to the same 3 states each summer. I NEEDED to see what else the states had to offer. I didn't want to do it alone anymore but also didn't know anyone whose jobs gave them as much time off as mine did so a puppy I decided was the best option. I had always wanted a puppy! If there was a puppy at a party, that's who I was with. My best friend and I dog sat for people all the time but just wasn't in the card for me to have one of my own at the time. My first apartment in the states was also my first time living alone. Saw on Instagram a lady had a few doodles left and in my heart I knew. The timing of having my own place plus the exact breed of dog I've wanted my whole life being available, I was getting a fur bestie for sure! When I went to go see the pups, I really didnt think I would be bring one home. I just wanted to look and see if it would be a good fit. Didn't even have the okay with the place I was living at yet. oops. But when I stepped foot in that yard looking at the light brown curly haired princess I saw in the picture and wanted so badly DIDN'T give me a minute of her time, I thought okay maybe not. I looked down and realized the white chunky ball of fur who was chewing on my shoe lace, hadn't left my foot the entire time. I really wanted a light brown color puppy but my little prince was holding on to my shoe for dear life! Got him to stopped chewy but then he SAT ON MY FEET and just followed me around when I was trying to meet his sisters. He chose me and I knew I couldn't walk away from him.

Now him and I pack up my car and go wherever our hearts desire. He loves being outside, as long as I'm there. If I try to leave him in the yard at my grandma's, lol he sits on the chair and looks at us through the kitchen window while the other dogs play. Once we let him in or we sit outside with him, he's full on dog mode. His first car ride made him a bit sick but now all I have to do is open one door and he's the first one to jump in! Long car rides don't bother him, I like to think it's because he knows the destinations are always worth it! He loves othe animals and people. Not so much babies but in a Ew leave me alone kind of way. I think he doesn't know what do with them so he just slowly leans away lol. I think because of his fur maybe, he is not a fan of dog beds and only lays on the furniture for a minute before going to any area that doesn't have carpet or anything soft. He's big and fluffy so he prefers wood floor or the cool garage ground.

Anyways this post was way longer than I meant it but that's the story of Meeko. Follow along for his fun adventures and tips on where you can bring your fur babies too!

[micahalexi]

One of the most memorable periods of a person's life is often their time in college. Compared to school life, it is completely different. We are exposed to novel situations and concepts during our time in college. Some people believe that college life entails living it up to the fullest and having a wild time. Others must devote more time to their studies and take their careers seriously if they want a better future.

With three semesters left till I graduate, join me as I reflect on the events that took place over my college years.

It was an unfortunate but somehow an auspicious period to welcome and/or begin such an event. The pandemic became a reset button for every student, including of course the faculty, and other personnels. As we transitioned from a face-to-face learning method to online classes, we had a lot to take note of such as the learning devices, internet connection, online interactions and relationships, learning environment, and the flexibility of our time. Thank God, though, it was still a meaningful time.

Throughout my learning experience, I learned two things that significantly altered my habits, which helped me survive till this day.

(1) On procrastination.

Although we all have the very natural tendency to put things off, it can become rather problematic if it becomes a habit. Procrastinating too much can ruin your life and make it difficult for you to keep track of deadlines and schedules. You must therefore rein it in and regain control when procrastination spirals out of control.

Breaking the onerous chore into manageable parts is one method to quit putting it off. When a task or amount of work is too great, we often put it off. Nevertheless, if the task is divided into manageable pieces, we may do each one without feeling overwhelmed. To aid you in the processes, you can also make a thorough schedule or timeline of any form.

I learned it the hard way that at times, it could be advantageous to switch up our work environment. It gave me the boost I needed to get moving on my assignment and stop putting it off. Having a parent or a friend that keeps an eye on my progress also made it at all possible. It motivated me to stay driven and pushed me to complete the assignment on schedule. Moreover, it is important to avoid focusing too much or berating oneself for occasionally putting off tasks. Every now and then, procrastination strikes one of us. Thus, getting a break and then getting back to work would be enough, as long as it does not cause our entire timetable to fall through.

(2)On support system.

We have had and will continue to experience stressful, discouraging, heartbreaking, and challenging situations throughout our lives. But we don't need to go through those trying times alone. I've always understood the value of having a support system, but I didn't really comprehend it until I went to college. I started to feel the weight of my college obligations. I occasionally feel somewhat overburdened by my workload, the requirements of my major, the student organizations I am involved in, my executive board position, and my social life. I frequently call my mother to vent to her about my life and the stress I'm experiencing. Or the number of times that I've sat in my room and rehashed the ongoing drama with my friends and brother. My support system is fantastic, and I am incredibly grateful for each and every one of them.

It's crucial to have a strong support system in life. They support you through the difficult periods in your life and are there to share in your joy. They help in easing some of the strain and pressure that life can bring. You can truly see that you are never alone in life and that you never have to face anything alone by having a support system. People in your support system are those that are always there for you because they care about you and want the best for you. These are the ones who support you when you want to quit and who rejoice with you when you triumph. Without them, I'm positive I wouldn't be where I am today.

Occasionally, not everyone is fortunate enough to have supportive parents or even companions. Sometimes family is found among people who are closest to you. Understand that you are not alone if you feel as though you may not have a support system from family or a close friend. But never lose sight of the people who have supported you through good times and bad; this is the kind of system that anyone would consider themselves fortunate to possess. That is noteworthy.

Everyone's life is enriched by their involvement in student life. Our actions as students will determine how the country and the students will fare in the future. As such, getting the appropriate advice is imperative. Our life's foundation is built throughout our time as students.

Hence, a strong foundation will result in a strong building. A shoddy foundation, however, cannot support a building. In other words, student life encourages us to value our humanity.

Most people are unaware of how fortunate and privileged it is to even be able to live the student life. Many kids want one but never get one. Hence, if someone is able to pursue education, they must maximize it.

Student life will not always be joyous, but it will be worthwhile. It assists us in developing character traits like honesty, patience, perseverance, and more as we progress through life.

Overall, student life is nothing short of ideal. It has a lot of ups and downs, but it is all rewarding in the end. Many aspects of our lives later on are influenced by our time as students. As a result, we must work to be good students in all areas, not just academic ones. It acts as the foundation for a prosperous existence in the future.

[maxxieal]

Day 1

[ 1/1/2023 ]

Today is a new me, changing my personality i didn't like. Like being too loud, laughing too much and chatting too much, i wanna be so quiet for a while.

Somehow, i feel off about them and i don't know why. This feeling is same as what happened last December 2021 too like staying away from everyone and stay to that special friend who's been there for you all those times. I wanna be with her too, i wanna enjoy those times we can't do due to pandemic. I ain't comfortable with my "friends" right now, it's just i can't vibe with them. Sometimes they rely on me which is tiring too, why always me? I really regret to be with you guys when we became a trio like my life become hell. Why the fuck i helped you for that? WHY THE FUCK NA TINULUNGAN KITA, IPAGTANGGOL KITA? FUCK THIS SHIT , WHY IM WITH YOU GUYS ? I WISH I WILL HAVE A CHSNCE TO GO BACK IN TIME SO I CAN RESTART EVERYTING I MADE A MISTAKES.

Im a type of friend who gets tired with all of your shit.. too:(

I kept overthinking.. mostly of him.. Im being uncomfortable and annoyed for some reason. Istg, if i didn't answer him i'll never be in relationship again. ITS TOO ANNOYING TO UPDATE EVERY SINGLE THING IM DOING, CAN YOU JUST FUCKING TRUST ME? CANT YOU SEE IM TRYING TO HAVE FUN WITH MY RELATIVES AND MYSELF TOO!? HOW IMMATURE YOU ARE WHEN YOU ARE OLDER THAN US? Bro you aew almost 2 years away from being an 18 years old yet you still act like a fucking child. All i want for this vacation is to enjoy my life alone without any classmates of mine in this school. All i want is my old friend and my family in this break. And not all the time i have time with y'all shits so get the fuck outta here and let me have my peace.

Anyways so, i still want to drink but wala ng beer 🥲 This was the beer btw, it taste like a softdrink. Inubos ko isang bottle but this bubbles there? I accidentally did smthng i didnt know, i was quietly enjoying it lmao

About Kpop, PLEASE LMAO GALAW GALAW NAMAN JAN KASI PUTCHA NA DRA-DRY AKO . Please bring back the old me na super addict sa phase na to even sa Anime lmaossosiso

But is this the sign na.. am i getting older? Like... there's a time na i wanna.. nvmd

I also finished Alice in the borderland S1 so in S2 , im already on ep 3 or 4 ig? I forgot cause i feel like im gonna throw out in any minute rn 😭 Btw, bye. HWHAHAHAH

Edit :

So i already finished the whole series right after 4pm , Its was so good! I cried at the end though, the only thing i could say is every person cards is so damn insane! unlike the number cards. ITS FUCKING INSANE THOUGH, Thanks god to Usagi , she's the best! She knew Mira manipulating Arisu to quit the game so she did her best to tell him na don't listen to her. Bitch this Mira is getting on my nerve like SHE SO ARTE WHEN SPEAKING AND SHE EVEN PINAHAHABA UNG KWENTO DI PA DIRECT TO THE POINT. I WANNA STUB HER TO DEATH LMAOEJSIWBJSJA.

After i finished the whole series, lets move to the other point. I opened up to my mother earth since i really don't want to feel nervous eh, i wanna end everything to the both of my friends hahaha, but need ko talaga makisama 'til the end hahahhaa.

I also tell that na he is courting me, but i don't want though. I find something i don't like haha, it feels like he can't do anything what i wanted to achive for life. So i'll be independent and not leaning to others though, men is shit btw hwhauwhwh.

I realize its not worthy to be in relationship so fast, its so kadiri na somehow. Im making him hate me for that shit

[arsonist-chicken]

I am begging. BEGGING everyone to get vaccinated if you can, and to reduce your social contacts, and

My healthy, vaccinated, 24-year-old sister who very rarely gets sick at all caught Covid and now she is MISERABLE. She has a fever, possibly a spine infection, hardly hears on one ear, a headache, a nosebleed, and is cold all the time (the woman usually wear shorts in winter sometimes) and sick enough to almost throw up.

She meets like two or three people anymore except for at work, she's vaccinated, and STILL she got sick, and badly, because some people put other people's health and safety over their own personal convenience.

If you can get vaccinated and tested at least semi-regularly and you don't, why don't you just piss off and lock yourself in at home instead of endangering others and being responsible for their sickness, possible long-term effects, or deaths. Why don't you fuck off and don't endanger all of us who still restrict our everyday lives and try to protect others and be compassionate.

[redead-red]

ZombieRed//Redead-Red Fanfic Review 2021

let's pretend this isn't a day late

Holy shit did I write a lot this year. I'm crazy proud of myself for doing all of this work while also working full time. During a fucking pandemic.

Fic count: 5 Overall Word Count: 105,879 Fandoms: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Danny Phantom

Soul Swap Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer Pairing: Buffy/Spike Rating: T-M (major violence warning) 2021 Word Count: 40,815 Total Word Count: 91,338 Completion Date: December 15th, 2021 Notes: This fic has been my monster fic. The start of my time travel bullshit. Before I embarked on this I hadn't written a multi-chapter fic since I was 16. And here I was writing a mammoth fic that I kind of had an idea for where it was going. But the details? No idea. It was really just a "I'll write and I guess the fic will show up". My writing has improved dramatically from the start in the summer of 2020 to the end. I've learned a lot, I've grown a lot, and I'm really proud of this.

Threads of Time Fandom: Danny Phantom Gen fic Rating: T Word Count: 28,222 Completion Date: January 21st, 2021 Notes: My introduction to the phandom as a whole! I had been lurk-reading a bunch of identity reveal fics most of November and December of 2020 and then I was hit with the idea of Maddie being in a time loop. And my brain said, "you must write this I won't let you do anything else." And here we are! I really, really love how this fic turned out. I'm still proud of the concept, how I wrote it. I think it's honestly REALLY good. And of course, it features my fave trope which is time travel.

i came out to have a good time and honestly? im feeling so attacked rn Fandom: Danny Phantom Gen fic Rating: T Word Count: 6072 Completion Date: March 29th, 2021 Notes: I find that this fic is really overlooked but I really, really like it. I do understand why it's not as popular though. It's more of a comedic, "let's not think too hard" fic which some people didn't jive well with. Especially the OC I created for it. The point is that Jamie is a selfish bad person you guys she's a flawed character. AAAAAANYWAY, I just wanted so bad to do an accidental summoning fic. And this fic taught me how much I love writing Jazz her way of living is so stressful how does she function.

Naked Truth Lies Fandom: Danny Phantom Pairing: Unidentified Flying Ship (Danny/Wes) Rating: T Word Count: 7425 Completion Date?: listen it'll be done before the next DannyMay okay Notes: I went from having no idea who Wes was, to kinda avoiding him, to writing one tiny scene of him in my Invisobang fic, to falling in love with the little shit and falling into UFS hell. And I'm so happy to be here. This was done for DannyMay. It still isn't done. Listen I have the google doc open as I'm writing this post. It'll happen. I just. I love these two idiots. My heart.

Wake Me Up To Say Goodbye Fandom: Danny Phantom Gen fic Rating: T Word Count: 23,345 Completion Date: August 23rd, 2021 Artist: @emotigonecreative Notes: My invisobang fic!!! This fic started as a concept of "haha wouldn't it be funny if Jack was explaining to Phantom that Danny was a ghost?" and then suddenly all of this angst showed up. This fic would not have happened, wouldn't even be close to what it ended up being without EC being the greatest artist, beta, and friend throughout the entire writing process. And her art adds SO much to it. This really is our fic. The hardest part of this fic was finding Jack's voice and doing him justice as a character. The best part of this fic was finding Jack's voice and doing him justice as a character :)

And that's a wrap! What will 2022 bring? I dunno. Hopefully the end of my DannyMay fic >_>

[buddieisgoingtohappen]

Ana Related Fics

Outside Looking In

“Don’t worry, I’m always safe with Bucky, Ms. Flores.” She wants to laugh, because if only the kid knew just how much that innocent sentence says about her place in this situation. A stranger, an outsider to whatever it is that this thing with Edmundo and Buck is. -or- When Ana brings Christopher to the ER for a minor injury, she is very confused when Buck arrives at the hospital before Eddie does.

About that...

Eddie picked up his phone, smiling as he saw that it was a text from Ana. He thumbed open the message and then stared stupidly at the words. My test from yesterday came back positive. Before he could even comprehend the words fully, his phone pinged again with a second message from her. I am so sorry, Edmundo. Or, the aftermath of Eddie allowing Ana into their bubble during a global pandemic.

Ringing Out

Ana gets tired of Eddie constantly checking his phone during dates and leaving early, so she turns his phone off when he leaves the room. What happens when there's an emergency and Buck can't get ahold of Eddie?

You’re the only one I need

“What is going on?!” Ana snapped at Edmundo’s friends, “Why was Evan allowed to see Edmundo, not me when I’m his girlfriend” she threw her hands in the air. “Why is he the one that will take Christopher to see his father?”

The Babysitter's Club

5 time Christopher called the 118 to babysit him instead of Ana and 1 time he didn't have to.

Aching For His Touch

Eddie suddenly stops touching Buck, and Buck doesn't know what to do with his crushing feelings of loneliness.

Accidentally Friends

Buck and Ana accidentally become friends after Ana and Eddie break up. Ana helps Buck figure out his relationships.

the other mr diaz

“Excuse me? If you don’t mind me asking, where’s Mr Diaz? I specifically requested to speak with Eddie. You are not him.” The man tilts his head at that, a quizzical expression forming between his brows, and Ana can’t help but be reminded of a confused puppy. “No, I’m not Eddie.”

Sick Day

All Buck wanted to do was spend the day taking care of his boyfriend. He didn't want his boyfriend's coworker (who is also his ex) showing up.

More than a defintion

Buck had come to terms with his ADHD. He just couldn't deal with people thinking that his ADHD defined him. As it turns out, neither could Eddie.

There's No Good in Goodbyes

"'I just need you to take a step back, just for a little bit. It’s not permanent; it’s just until Ana and I can get our feet under us, you know?” Eddie’s eyes were worried but his smile was hopeful. Buck felt sick. Eddie wanted him to step back, to leave. He was around too much; in their space too much; in their lives too much; always too much. God, Buck really must have exhausted them until Eddie had had enough; he couldn’t tolerate Buck anymore. Buck had to hand it to him; he’d lasted longer than anyone, besides Maddie. Maybe he should tell him that. The last man standing, finally bowing in defeat."

I Choose You

"I'm doing what's best." Buck says. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?" "You don't need a burden like me to take care of."

More Than a Melody's Needed

Three years after her relationship ended, Ana Flores makes a friend.

for what it's worth

Buck and Ana get trapped in an elevator together. They have some conversations about life, the shooting, and Eddie

Who Cares If Someone's Time Runs Out (If A Moment Is All We Are)

To Eddie Diaz, Ana Flores was perfect on paper. She was everything that his parents had told him he needed in a wife growing up. So he really wanted to make it work. To do that, though, Eddie makes the decision to push Buck away. A decision that not only hurts Buck deeply, but that could have disastrous consequences for Buck, Eddie, and the entire 118 family. Will Eddie realize what he has done before it's too late?

Thought I would never see her again.

Buck and Eddie go to Parent/ Teacher conferences and are interduce to the new vice Principal who just so happens to be one Miss Ana Flores. How will the night go when they try not to run into or have to talk to her.

i don't swim and you're not in love

She turns to Eddie and says something else, but Buck is busy fighting the headrush he gets at the sound of Ana Flores calling Eddie and Christopher 'the boys'. Like they belong to her already. God, what’s wrong with him? What is this?

The Tale of Two Dads

Buck's supposed to be having a quiet afternoon before the Diaz's come over to bake treats for Chris' next bake sale. He's not prepared for Eddie to show up, several hours early, hiding out from his girlfriend. He's definitely not prepared for said girlfriend to sweep into his apartment and tell him that he's overreaching and needs to step away from her family, and he is ABSOLUTLEY not prepared for a call saying that Chris is missing. Will they make it through the day, or will this seemingly quiet afternoon end in tragedy?

Last updated: 10/17/23

[fan4196]

Mister Perfectly Fine

Fearless - Taylor's Version (From The Vault)

As long as he's going, working his eight hours at the hospital, running from one meeting to the other, squeezing surgeries in every free minute he has or running behind the twins at home, everything is fine. As long as his mind is going he's perfectly fine. But as soon as his head hids the pillow or he sits down alone in his office and his mind starts to calms down he's not fine anymore. As soon as his mind stops thinking about the hospital he has to run, the patients he has to save or about his twins, his thoughts take over - thoughts he hates and loves at the same time. Deep thoughts that bring forth every kind of emotion in his body. Thoughts about her. The one good thing he had in his life for so long and now not anymore because he chose his kids. He chose his kids over her and after months he still doesn't know if it was the right or wrong decision. Since the day he left her, this thought lives in his head like a parasite, never leaving him. In every quiet second his mind goes back to this decision and everything involved in it and makes him go nuts. But not only his mind goes crazy also his heart. He could cry everytime he thinks about her and the potential future he lost by leaving her. He could beat himself at the thought of how much he hurt her - again. It beats him up that he not only broke the vow he gave her not to long before he left but that he broke the biggest promise he ever gave her - to always be her home and to never leave her. He knew that this was and still is her biggest insecurity. Way to many people left her or pushed her aside like she was nothing and Alex promised to himself, pretty early in their relationship, that he would never do that to her. But he did, more than once.

Every quiet minute his heart aches at his biggest lost he ever experienced and at the unconditional love he had received from her daily and now never will again.

Of course his kids love him and he knows that Izzie does too in some way but it's just not the same. It's not the kind of love that overfills his heart with warmth every day. The kind of love that let him growl at the ceiling, fake break up in front of a whole hospital, that is ok with going jail to prevent someone from having to testify, that puts on fake vampire teeth and marries someone for a second time after a crappy day at work. The kind of love that, now that it's gone, makes him realise how big of an impact it had on him, his mind and his heart. Because now that it's gone, his body wants it back like a drug. But nothing, sadly not even his kids, can fill his empty heart completely. There's always this whole that nothing can fill.

And so everytime his mind gets the chance to calm down it craves for the drug he can't consume. She is 1800 miles away, living her life like he should too - but he just can't, not really.

He leans back in his chair starring at the picture of the twins that's standing on his office desk right beside his work laptop. Their silly faces smile towards the camera. He loves his kids, they are one of the best things that ever happened to him but every time he looks at them he can't stop but wonder what his and Jo's kids would have been like. If they would have had a little boy first, who was through and through a mommas boy or if they would have had a little girl first, who would have looked like a carbon copy of Jo and would have adored her daddy to death. Or if they would have had both; twins - silly and foul-mouthed but still the cutes little angels.

He hates those uncontrolled, silent thoughts of what if. He hates that he secretly wishes things were different. He hates that he's not fine when he should be.

He loosens his stare from the only picture on his desk and turns his chair to reach for the lowest drawer of his desk - like he did so many times before. He opens it to take the only item out and carefully strokes his thumb over the wooden frame until it hits the silky red ribbon he never took off. Starring at the picture in the frame, memories of one of the best days in his life play in his head. From her excited face when she showed up at Mer's house, to her excitingly kissing Arizona, to her storming into his dressing room mocking him for something she thought he did, to her loud, pure laugh in the shed, her soft lips on his after they said I do, to her sleepy smile as he picked her up to carry her bridal stile through their loft door.

Everything about this day was perfect even though nothing went according to plan. But that was so them. Nothing in their six years together ever went according to plan. If it would have, he would have married her a year into their relationship. They would have started making babies immediately and would now live in a big suburban house with their five kids, two dogs and probably some fish. But it's not, their life didn't go according to plan, they had some massive bumps in their road - their ups and downs, they broke up and found their way back together, they had their difficult paths to navigate through but they did it and it made them stronger - as a person and as a couple. He always thought that nothing could ever break them. And he loved the thought of getting old with Jo and to die with her at his side once they were wrinkly and grey. Now everything changed and it's his fault.

Looking at the big smile on her face, the urge to call her comes over him - to hear her voice, to talk to her about everything he hates right now.

Way to many times the thinks of just dialing her number and calling her. The thought of hearing her voice again makes his heart flutter. He misses her. He misses talking to her. He misses his friend he can tell everything. He misses their lazy nights curled up in each other's arms on the couch, a trashy reality show in the background, while they just talk - about everyone and everything for hours without loosing a topic.

He also misses her silly self. Her bad jokes that she thought were hilarious. Her face when she told them. Her pure laugh after she told them. When they were alone she never took herself to serious. She was one hundred percent herself around him. Joking, laughing, running around without pans and only one of his shirts on.

He's not gonna lie, he also misses her body. Her perfect body - her ass, her boobs, her mouth, her smell, her hair, her perfect hands that she loved to bury in his hair. He loves and misses every bit of her. He misses what her body was able to do to his. How her hand in his neck was able to give him goosebumps on his entire body. How her presence when she walked into a room, made his stomach flutter. How her lips on his let him forget everything. How her curled up in his arms, close against his body made him love her even more. It wasn't just the amazing sex he misses, it is her.

He puts the picture down on his desk running his hands over his face. He never thought that he could miss someone this much - and he had lost a lot of people over time.

The little knock on his door let him sit up straight again. He quickly puts the picture back in the drawer and closes it before he let's the person come inside.

"Doctor Karev. You wanted to speak me?"

"Doctor Jones. Yeah, please sit down." He points to the chairs in front of his desk to let the resident sit. "I heard you were at Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital in Seattle. Tell me how it was."

"Oh. It was amazing. I've never seen a this innovative and cutting edge hospital before. No offense." The brunette smiles a little nervous as she sits down in front of her boss. 

"Absolutely not. I know how good it is. I learned in that hospital and worked there for many years." Alex replies with a little, toothless smile.

"Really? I never knew that." She answers surprised.

"So tell me a little bit. What did you do while you were there? Who did you meet?" Alex asks, interested in hearing about his former colleagues and friends.

"Oh I- Ok on the first day I was in their ER. Doctor Hunt showed me around and I assisted him. The second day I met the Doctor Meredith Grey. God she's everything, but I guess you know that. She showed me around the ICU and I met Doctor Webber and Doctor Bailey. On the third day I was in ortho and met Doctor Lincoln, he's amazing. Well they call him Ortho-God for a reason. My third day I was with Doctor Sheppard. She showed me her newest scans and let me join in on an operation. The last day I was with Doctor Hayes on the Peds floor. He was so nice and showed me around the NICU and PICU. I also met Doctor DeLuca and Doctor Wilson there, they were both so nice and showed me some of their cute little pacients." She smiles after finishing.

"Sorry, Doctor Wilson?" He asks a little confused.

"Yeah. She was so nice. She showed and explained me everything and let me hold one of her patients. She was so cute. The baby not Doctor Wilson. I mean Doctor Wilson is pretty cute too, especially when she's talking to her little patients but that's not the point, right?" She laughs.

"I guess I missed something, little patients? What is she doing on the Peds floor?" Alex asks again, trying to get every single little bit of information from the resident.

"Well that's where OB/Gyn's are sometimes, right?" She shrugs. 

"Wait. OB/Gyn?" Now he's confused. Did Jo change specialties or was the resident in front of him talking about someone completely different?

"Yeah. Oh right. She was a general surgeon before but changed specialties during the pandemic. She told me everything when we were having lunch. She said she needed some joy in her life after her husband left her and she found that in OB so she changed specialties." Doctor Jones clarifies, with a smile.

"Thank you." Alex nods, to signal the brunette that he got all the information he wanted.

"Ahm sure. Anything else, Doctor Karev?" She asks before she stands up to leave.

"No. It's good to hear you had a great time in Seattle." He gives her a toothless smile before he leans forwards.

"I did. Thank you again for letting me do that."

"No problem."

As the door closes he leans back in his chair again. Thinking about what Doctor Jones just told him.

He's happy that she's happy. That she found new joy in her life. That's everything he needs to know. He needs her to be fine. Even though he misses her even more now and is not fine, he is happy that she is fine.

-

It’s finally Taylor Swift x Jolex Week! So excited for all the stories. Here’s mine, hope you like it.

Enjoy!

-

@odd-birds-and-booksellers @doc-pickles @angry-slytherin @cicinicole-14 @mac-andcheeses @renipedia @jobrookekarev @kidneys4karev @only-freaking-sunflowers @iamtrebleclefstories

[fouralignments]

3, 4, 11, 17?

Sorry for not getting back to you yesterday. I took a ten mile walk and was utterly exhausted when I got your question.

3. In Morning Light and Love’s Embrace, I thought it was soft and cute and just very loving and sensual without having to write sex. I adore the imagery and all the little plot/backstory weaving together. I really want to come back to it and write the Passover part/Erik's proposal, its thoroughly hinted at and people have been commenting on it.

4. Of Jet Fuel, Self-Doubt, and Fatherhood, I was genuinely surprised that this became my most popular fic via hits. I just didn't get as to why it got so popular so quickly; I thought it was short, but that's not true I have written shorter. And I must admit, I don't think its my best work by far.

The God and the Thief, which currently has 42 Subscriptions, which is the highest of all my fics. I thought this story was far to niche and Sabah Nur in the Dadneto fandom wasn't that popular as a villain or as a counterpoint to Erik. Its also the fic where I overindulge in a style, in my view is very close to novel-istic writing like professional published. Though I am really proud of myself for writing chapter 2, its my longest piece (total of 22 pages); now can be considered a Novella.

11. I adore 3rd person omniscient, I like the flexibility that it brings and I can switch between POV, fairly easily. But I would rather stick pins in my eyes than write in the first person; I can't even read first POV fanfiction, it breaks my emersion. Though the the Great Gatsby doesn't bother me. I might go into deep style now and again without knowing it.

17.

Chapter 3: The Tan Room/ SOS of My Son Comes Back to Me

Its currently 6 pages and 1629 words long, the placements of the scenes are correct, its just matter of expanding and completing them. But Charles and Erik still have issues pertaining to the events of DOFP; Erik not feeling like an equal to Charles in their relationship; a bit of mystery around Peter; some flashbacks and mood setting in the Mansion; Charles Xavier being a pompous ass. Remy, who was originally supposed be a reference; I have now came up with a subplot for him. There is a lot.

I am really leaning toward a more Columbo style mystery where it isn't about whodunit, but how Charles and Erik are going to catch En Sabah Nur and become the power couple the audience knows that they can be if they sort out their shit.

Shabbat Shalom

Its done and it was even a draft in Ao3, but I just didn't publish it.

It's about the Xavier-Lehnsherr family celebrating Rosh Hashanah and Erik and Charles are helping Pietro and Wanda (First time writing her actually). With a metallokinesis! Pietro, he's having quite the hard time controlling his powers. Pietro feeling isolated and goes into how he didn't graduate from high school because the system failed him; its based on my own family history that came into light after my dad died.

The pandemic unmoored me in a way, I was very assured by beliefs before all of this. I realized that I had no rituals, had very little friends.

The lockdowns made me think, once there was nothing more to consume with TV and movies. I was left with nothing but my thoughts; I was closer to death than most because I saw day in and day out my mom coming home and taking off her scrubs and putting them in the wash and jumping into the shower. There were some nights, where I thought I was going to lose her. With the mass death, I just wanted someone to blame and be angry at with Covid and my dad's diagnosis. I wanted something to be angry at.

All that I could do was write. I would call my works meditations on Judaism.

But I wrote Shabbat Shalom, during those darkest hours. I found more comfort in a holiday that I didn't even celebrate than X-Mas of that year. I don't where I heard this from, but writing and publishing, and telling stories is about connection.

X-Mas brought no joy, no reassurance, the tree had lost all meaning. I just went through the motions.

I also started listening to the Hashivenu podcast.

I had another existential crisis when my father died; I don't know shit and what did I want out of life?

I cried when I was editing it. Because I went OH, OOOOHHHHH....I had the realization that I wasn't just writing about the characters anymore, but myself.

I don't want to publish because its far too personal to me. I wouldn't mind sending it personally to my friends...

Here we are studying the scared text of X-Men that has brought us all together.

There is just something that I really like about Judaism; I think its finding the scared in the everyday.

[bisluthq]

So I have this friend who I've known for around 7 years now (there was a 3,5 year break in between that because I moved abroad) but that's how long we've known each other. We got back in touch during March when we were both struggling mentally because of the pandemic and we often went on long walks together but since we did, she's always been very weird in her remarks towards me. Basically blamed the fact that I moved away as the cause of her depression (and it seems like she holds me as a person accountable for it), always says that I don't really know what it's like to be afraid of failure because I never put any effort into anything anyway (she always phrases this as a joke but it's not), always seems to find ways to compare our suffering and try and say she's doing worse and more and I'm fed up with it. She's also been copying me for months in basically everything I do. How do I cut her out? She's in the same school year as me so I see her very often and she also often asks to hang out and I just don't know how I can truly keep my distance from her because the last time I tried, it didn't work. Do you have any advice?

I think you need to firmly tell her you don’t want to be friends and if she invites you again just… say no. Like you’re doing what’s best for you and she might be hurt and think you’re a bitch but like if she’s toxic then you gotta do what you gotta do.

I know it feels hard and awkward to bring it up and to do a friend breakup. Like we’re not primed for it as people. But sometimes that’s what you’ve got to do, literally sit down with her or write a message (whatever is easier for you) and be like “I’m really sorry but I don’t want to be friends anymore. Please respect that.” You can outline the reasons or even… just say that you’re not comfortable anymore and want to move on.

Hope this helps, good luck, and feel free to update us on how it all goes.

[randomobsessionsofa30something]

My top 10 korean dramas of 2020

Today is the last day of the year so I think it's time to share which dramas were my favorite in 2020. I wish you all the best for 2021!!

10.5. The King: Eternal Monarch. So here's the thing: this drama was not great. I absolutely hated the ending and the editing however I do appreciate what they tried to do. It had great potential and Lee Minho and Kim Go Eun were nice as a couple. The story is about two dimensions: one that is like the real world and another where Korea still has a king. The worlds start to mix and the King crosses, meets a detective, someone he has been looking for since he was a kid.

10. Find me in your memory. This drama was so much fun especially in the first half. I had a couple of issues with the last two episodes but nothing major. Moon Ga Yeon plays an actress that lost some of her memories and is trying to live in the moment. She meets a newscaster (Kim Dong Wook) and falls for him. However he has a disease that makes him unable to forget each and all details he has lived through. They both are unaware they share a bond that will link them but also puts them in danger.

9. Start up. This drama was silly at times but I really enjoyed it. Suzy stars in this drama as a sales employee that has gone through a lot because she chose to stay with her father after they parents got divorced who was an unsuccessful entrepreneur. She wants to show her sister and her mother she can be successful on her own so she applies to receive a grant (korean survival style). There she meets her childhood crush, a guy who she exchanged letters with or so she thinks. Nam Do San (Nam Joo Hyuk) is a guy that is trying to start up a company but has failed so far to get investors. When a famous CEO shows up at his door asking him to pretend to have written some letters he ends up getting dragged into a ruse to cheer up this girl except she shows up in what was his last chance to make it.

8. Kairos. I started watching this drama just because WINNER's Kang Seung Yoon had a role in it. At the beginning I thought I wasn't gonna love it because of the time travel aspect to it. The plot though changed my mind. This mistery drama starred by Lee Se Young and Shin Sung Rok really surprised me. The story is about a girl that is struggling to get by but things change when she loses her phone and when she calls back a man picks it up in the future. By the way when I made my OSTs list it totally slipped my mind just how good Kang Seungyoon's rock ballad Can you hear me? is.

7. Itaewon class. Park Seung Joon plays a man that did time in jail because of an injustice. He comes out with a plan to bring down the people responsible for his father's death. To do that, he assembles a team of misfits and opens up a restaurant in Itaewon. The injustices in korean society and his past will get in the way of his love life and his goal to achieve his dreams. I wasn't a huge fan of the last few episodes of the drama but I did liked it overall.

6. Strangers. Season 2. If you watched the first season you'll definitely like the second. A web of corruption and deceit is drawn from episode one so it really was satisfying when it all came together. If you haven't watched the first season, I'll just say this is well made crime drama and that now would be a good time to binge watch both seasons.

5. Sweet Home. I don't really watch horror movies because I think I'm too logical to be scared with monsters or ghosts so most times I just don't watch any. However I really enjoyed this apocalyptic horror 10 episode drama. Based on a webtooon, it tells the story of the inhabitants of a building after Seoul is run down by monsters.

4. Kingdom Season 2. I actually didn't watch Kingdom last year. I watched the teaser and I was like "Joseon and Zombies? I don't know about that". The pandemic has led me to stay home for so long that I think I watched all of Netflix korean dramas I hadn't checked out which finally led me to watch Kingdom. I liked the first season but it was the second season I enjoyed the most. If you haven't checked it out, I'll just say it's based on the Land of the Gods webtoon and it's the story of the Crown Prince who finds out that, because of greed, his stepmother has revived his father and a plague spreads through Joseon.

3. Hyena. This intense legal drama tells the story of a prideful attorney that lives for his job and meets his ideal woman in a laundromat. However she humiliates him when she shows up as the opposite counselor in a high profile divorce case. This was such a funny drama and the cases were interesting. It had a double digit ratings in Korea.

2. Do you like Brahms? This drama is slow. Like really slow paced. So it's not for everyone but I was just so obsessed with this drama while it was airing. It's a sweet romantic drama about a pianist (Kim Min Jae) who has no passion for what he does and a violinist (Park Eun Bin) who has all the passion but lacks talent. They are both kind and just really bad a communicating their feelings so when they end up getting to know each other they somehow connect. They have another thing in common: they both are in a similar position when it comes to love they're in love with the girlfriend/boyfriend of their best friends.

1. It's okay not to be okay. This was my favorite drama by a long shot. It's just another romantic comedy. However it is so well done. From the cinematography to the plot and even the animation everything was on point for me. Honestly it felt like this really was Kim Soo Hyun's grand comeback to dramas. Seo Yeo Ji's excelled in portraying a strong but lonely woman whose upbringing was different from anyone else's so she grew up to be a rude and unapologetic children story writer. She meets Moon Gang Tae and realizes it's not the first time she has met him. On another hand, Moon Gang Tae puts on a strong face whose sole goal in life is care for his autistic older brother. When he goes back to his hometown he ends up finding out the truth behind his mother's death. I also loved that the story is narrated at times as a fairy tale.

[cheekblush]

i feel your pain with rocky friendships. i haven't had a deep connection in a while. i have like... 2 friends now but one of them lives miles away and in a different timezone and has her own life. the other one chats up a storm when it's about her but when i say something she replies with "haha" liiike bro give me at least a SHRED of interaction. i'm dying lol i didn't think my social life would be this dry at 25.

hello rose petal 🌹 i'm really seeing myself in your message.. i also expected my life to be a lot more lively and exciting at this age (turning 25 tomorrow 💀) of course we live in very difficult times currently (can't believe we're living through so many moments that will be in future history books.. it's so scary) but nonetheless it has also been difficult for me to really connect to people before the outbreak of this pandemic. it's just so hard to find genuine friends these days.. it seems most people only look for company or 'friends' they can have fun with. in my last years of uni i formed only superficial friendships i had no one i could rely or confide to and after so many miserable experiences with friendships i can't help but feel "is it because of me? is it my fault? maybe i'm just not likeable or asking for too much" but the answer to all of these is a big fat NO!!! we're not asking for too much when we want friends that actually care about us and that show the same effort and commitment to the friendship. so that "friend" of yours that loves to talk about herself but doesn't have anything to say when it's about you? that's not a friend. i also had to learn this the hard way with a lot of painful experiences and it really sucks that it's so fucking difficult to at least make one genuine, sincere and true friend. like you i also have several friends who live in other countries, in other timezones. i have met most of them through tumblr and will forever be grateful for having encountered such wonderful souls on here (i mean it's always easier to connect online bc you usually get to know people with the same interests) but when it comes to irl friends *crickets* i consider like 3 people my friends but just like with your situation they are not the best friends.. i feel like i haven't had a true best friend in years or at least someone i'm very close to and can come to with all my problems and thoughts (maybe these days only a therapist can be that person..) and with my online friends... well that's the thing the friendships are online and the chances of actually meeting them are so slim especially in the current state of the world. still a lot of the times they are the people that keep me going and look out for me. it really makes you think when people from all over the world care more about you and understand you better than your "friend" that lives a few minutes away from you... idek where i'm going with this anymore... i wish i could take away your pain, i wish i could be your friend irl or magically make a genuine friend appear at your doorstep.. unfortunately i can't do such things and maybe for now we can find comfort in the fact that we aren't actually alone with our loneliness and our feelings. it is extremely difficult to make real friends in the time we live in and it also doesn't get easier the older you get. kindergarten, school and uni made it easier to get to know people but even then most of these friendships didn't last for me or weren't sincere to begin with. i guess we can only hope that the right people will come along eventually. i deeply hope they do. friendships are so fundamental to life and platonic breakups are just as devastating as romantic ones. maybe you can try to talk to more people online? of course it's very one sided when the communication is mostly through texts and you can't even meet up but it's still better than nothing! you might find like minded people who share the same interests and experiences. to bring this very long and dragging reply to an end: i just sincerely hope that better times are right across the corner for all of us. that this darkness and loneliness will pass soon and we'll be able to meet refreshing and genuine people after all. until then, take care of yourself, be your own best friend and stay safe! 💗🧸🍡💫🎀🥠🕊🍊💌🌱🍯🎠💕🦋🎐