#also this is good practice for writing him bc i cannot for the life of me write karl in a satisfying way?? like most characters i write ->

[wedontdeservethestars]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Biohazard | Resident Evil (Gameverse) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Karl Heisenberg/Reader, Karl Heisenberg/You Characters: Karl Heisenberg, Donna Beneviento, Reader, Gender-Neutral Reader - Character, GN!Reader - Character Additional Tags: Fluff, Domestic Fluff, karl is a little music man wow who knew, mentions about karl's past, karl gets a little bit sad but it's okay Summary:

Practicing guitar SUCKS. It hurts and the notes never sound right. At least you're alone in your room and definitely not embarrassing yourself in front of your factory-mate and crush(?)...right?

[memoriashell]

rotating blorbos in my mind like a well adjusted human being.

[tac-the-unseen]

JUST READ THE COD GANG REACTING TO READER FALING AN ORGASM SO WHAT IF READER ADMITS THEY NEVER HAD ONE BEFORE?????? LIKE- NEW RELATIONSHIP??????? SORRY FOR CAPS IM ECSTATIC RN BC UR WORK IS SO GOOD🫶🫶🫶🫶🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌

COD characters finding out that Reader's past lover(s) have never given them an Orgasm.

Am I exactly sure what Anon is asking? No, But I will persist.

I'm choosing to write this with the interpretation of Reader never having an orgasm even though they've had sex with others. (The other way I read it was that Reader just flat out never had an orgasm before, and I think that's extremely unrealistic. So we're going with that one) ALSO because of the prompt You and the guys have yet to bump uglies!

Ghost:

•Simon is a little confused "Like...None of them?"

•He takes it very seriously

•He asks you to elaborate a little more. He just wants to know if the other guys sucked (or just didn't in this case) or if you two needed to do something specific in order to please you.

•He understands if you need some kind of accommodations and will ask you what he needs to do

•You and Simon have a long discussion over what you want your first time with him to be like. He makes sure you both have a clear understanding of what's to come (ha).

Soap:

•First thing he says is “Would you like to?”

•He thinks it's a little funny but really sad too

•”Darling, you're too pretty to let subpar men just use you.”

•He immediately wants to show you how it's done and what you've been robbed off

•He asks if he can take you for a “good ol' mustache ride”

Price:

•”Young men are dumb.” He says and takes a drag from his cigar

•”But I guess it's nice to know I have no competition.” He smiles

•He does talk to you about your needs and what he needs to do to meet them properly

•He takes you out on a nice dinner date, goes on a nice walk with you, and end up with his hands wrapped around your waist taking you home

Alejandro:

•Can not stop laughing

•As soon as you tell him he erupts into a fit of giggles. He takes him a full 3 minutes before he calms down enough to hug you and pat you back.

•”You poor thing.” he chuckles and kisses your cheek. “I'll make sure to make up for all their failures, Mi querida.”

•He’ll ask you what they were doing down there the whole time. Which leads to even more laughter when you tell him.

•”But I think I should buy you a nice dinner first.” he winks

Roach:

•Stunned

•Absolutely floored

•”Like never?” He signs. You can see the horror in his eyes

•He’s got his head in hands, contemplating life. He's so concerned for you. He has to take a moment of silence to comprehend the level of incompetence the men in your life must have had.

•When he finally sits up he looks you directly in the eyes and signs “Thank God I'm good with my hands.”

Gaz:

•Slowly turns his head to look at you with his brows furrowed and confusion

•Is too shock to speak

•He gets up to pour himself some Scotch

•”How many times have you had to fake an orgasm?” “8” he proceeds to down the entire drink and pour himself another

•This time he hands it to you “You need this more than me.”

Rudy:

•He gets up and takes a lap around the house

•When he gets back he pulls you into a hug

•”You deserve so much better, Mi Tesoro.”

•Kisses your jaw and runs his hands down your back. “I can give you so much better.” He tells you in-between kisses

•He offers you himself until your properly satisfied, for however long that takes

König:

•”Why do you like incompetent men?”

•He means it in a genuine way, But he accidentally reads you to filth.

•”Why spend your time and affection on someone who cannot please you?” he asks. “I didn't want to seem shallow.” You replied. “Shallow? Liebste, No.”

•He practically scolds you for allowing such men into your life. It's actually the most you've ever heard him speak. Which really tells you how upset he is.

•”You're Lucky I'm here. I will not let such things happen ever again.”

•And fuuuck, he means it

Mace:

•”Other men are filthy animals.” he tells you like it was a normal thing to say

•He gets in close to you and rests his arms on your hips. “Don’t get me wrong, I'm a man whore.” He laughs lightly and kisses you “But you knew that.”

•He asks you for all the funny details and thinks it would make a decent bonding experience.

•He tells you about his less than great sex stories and failures

•”Rest assured sweetheart, I'm a pro at making people scream.”

Thanks for reading <3

(I realize now that I wrote them all in different mindsets of this prompt... Good luck with that, I guess)

[animewhoree2]

MW2 Boys & Their Kinks

mmmm. yea. that's it. female reader bc i love boobs, but do lmk if anyone wants any other kind of reader i'm open to that!! i wanted this to be better but its kind of trash because your girl doesnt know how to write snippets. 

i’m down to write a part 2 just lmk ig?

length: 1k

content warning: knife play!, daddy kink!, bondage!, choking, p-in-v (duh), grinding, riding, dominant reader in rudy's section, slight exhibitionism(?), car sex... hehe

spanish translations: "dilo de nuevo"- say it again

Simon "GHOST" Riley

mans is into knife play

cannot change my mind

definitely was scared to bring it up because he didn't want to scare you away

was utterly shocked when you got excited

it's not an everyday practice but you both do it every now and again

i know damn well if he ever cuts any clothes off he'll immediately say "i'll buy you a new one"

"Simon-" You groaned after he sliced through your panties. He rolled his eyes before diving in, your brain quickly forgetting about the destroyed article of clothing.

He was lapping at your pussy, eating you out like he's never had anything so good in his life. The mask was barely off as he had just gotten home, so you struggled to grab onto something. Your hands fisted the bedsheets while your back arched off the mattress.

"I'm close-" You whispered before he pulled away leaving you whining. He pulled his combat knife out of his pocket, putting the dull side to your neck.

"Good girls don't complain when they're about to get fucked," He said roughly, only pulling his pants down far enough to get his cock out. You nodded against the blade, feeling yourself get wetter. He pushed in slowly, causing him to groan. You bit your lip, throwing your head back at the feeling.

"Careful sweetheart, don't wanna cut yourself." He snickered before deliviering a hard thrust.

Johnny "SOAP" MacTavish

not full-on exhibitionist but has tendencies

likes everyone to know your his

everyone knows you're off limits but like-

will give you hickies and hide all ur makeup and make sure you can't cover them up if you wanted to

definitely makes you scream so everyone can hear

You, Johnny, and the task force were out for drinks. It was supposed to be a night in but last minute the boys wanted to go out and poor Johnny could have one too many sometimes. But you were planning to get your brains fucked out until it was late as hell and you were sitting in a booth bored out of your mind. You loved seeing him have fun but you also wanted your time with him. And you were extremely horny. He was busy all week, leaving you by yourself, which after him, was hard to finish the job. He had his phone in front of him while chatting about something with the guys, so you shot him a text.

I'm horny.

That's all you said. All you needed to say, actually. Because he looked down and immediately looked at you, with a raised eyebrow. You gave him puppy dog eyes to try and persuade him, and that's exactly what you did.

"S'cuse me lads, gotta take care of something really quick," He winked at them before grabbing your wrist and leading you out to the car. You were in the backseat, making out in no time, as he slid your jeans off far enough. You unbuckled his pants, stroking his cock as soon as you could get your hands inside his boxers.

"'m sorry, didn't even cross my mind. I'll make it up to you," He whispered, breaking away from the kiss. He kissed down your neck before pushing you back so he could be between your thighs.

Let's just say it was not "really quick". The whole squad stared at the fogged-up car when they left the bar, placing bets on what went down.

Alejandro "DADDY" Vargas (thats all i got)

daddy kink 110%

also would love you tied up?

begging him?

"please daddy please"

bye

deceased

You guys were at some fancy banquet to get intel. So naturally, Alejandro wore a suit and you wore an evening dress. With a slit. That showed off cleavage. You just looked so gorgeous it was hard for him to remember why you both were here.

But a couple hours later, your wrists were tied to the hotel bed frame with his tie from tonight as he stood over you. He had just stopped going down on you after you came three times. You were already losing your mind, your brain practically mush. He wasn't much older than you but something in you just made it slip out.

"You ready princessa?"

"Yes daddy," He paused, dick in hand, right at your entrance before slowly looking up at you.

"Dilo de nuevo." He said firmly. You just looked up at him, through your lidded eyes, already fucked out,

"Please, fuck me daddy," You practically whined out. If you had any sense of self left you might be embarassed. But he groaned and thrust into you hard when he heard that fall from your lips.

Rodolfo "RUDY" Parra

you can't tell me this man isn't a full on switch

like he can be firm with you but some days...

he just wants to be the little bottom baby he is

and we love that

we love a man who lets his partner TREAT HIM RIGHT!!!

he loves praise too...

"Who's my good boy?" You asked, pausing from the rocking of your hips to grab his chin and lean down. His expression was unforgetable and his noises egged you on. He nodded, trying to find the words.

"Words honey, I need to hear you." You said softly, kissing down his neck.

"M-me. I am. I'm your good boy-" He stuttered. You could tell edging him all night was taking a toll on him. But you couldn't help it. His whines and moans had you dripping.

You picked up your pace again, bouncing on his cock while your hands held on to his shoulders. You could tell he was becoming impatient with the way his hips would buck into yours.

"You close?" He nodded again, trying to speak but only moaning instead. You leaned down and nibbled on his ear before telling him to cum inside you. His eyes shot open and looked at you with bewilderment. You continued your rapid pace, while he was still trying to process what you said. But you felt his dick twitch and you smiled to yourself before he painted your walls white.

[cdragons]

Revenant

Summary: Kol Mikaelson's soul manages to leave and travel while he still remains daggered in his coffin. While he wanders around and bitches about his life, he meets an unexpected friend. Warning(s): VERY HEAVY crack fic, technical crossover of fandoms, weird shit, Kol is a horny-ass gremlin, Druig & Kaety are obsessed with each other, Kol has a thing for witches bc he got mommy issues, Klaus is a bitch

Note: Merry Christmas to all who celebrate it! This fic came from an idea that I shared with @ethereal-athalia, and it is VERY much a crack fic. I don't have any plans in continuing this idea, but I wanted to write it out as a Christmas gift to @ethereal-athalia for how much of a good friend she's been to me. I never would have been able to do any of my fics without her in my corner. I own only my Hecate!OC. I do not own either Druig from Eternals, or Kol from TVD franchise. Also, Druig still very much exists in this fic and world bc I physically CANNOT write Kaety without Druig. Stay safe and hope that your upcoming year brings you all good health and happiness!

Kol hated being dead. Truly dead. Dead in a way that he couldn’t move or speak or live.

At least when he turned as a gift Mother Dearest he could still walk, even if he couldn’t use the arcane anymore. But of course, he would still always find his way back to witches and their magic. He couldn’t help it if he exuded that charm that made him so irresistible.

Gods, just remembering how pathetically sex-deprived his physical form was currently almost made him weep. He couldn’t wait until the moment he got that fucking silver dagger out of his chest. Nik was going to get it when he finally got out.

Sure, he may have crossed a line when he stated that Nik had a pair of buttocks flatter than a sheet of paper. But was he the one that gave his brother such lacking assets? No. That fault lied entirely with their mother and his biological father, thank you very much.

But alas, here his soul was, walking in a forest in the middle of some mosquito-flooded country.

At the very least, his gorgeous body was safe from the onslaught of bug bites and sweltering humidity. Only in the fucking Amazon did winter feel like summer.

Kol audibly groaned once more at the thought of his immaculate figure rotting away thanks to Nik. He couldn’t bear to think about how his illustrious fair skin being that dull grayish hue from being confined by death. At least when Bekah got daggered, Nik had the decency to make sure that her body remained stored in proper conditions and carefully encased in magic to prevent any harm coming to her. He had no guarantee. No, such love and devotion only went to ‘Lijah and Bekah when it came to Nik.

Story of his life: always an outsider, even with his own fucking siblings. Gods, he wanted nothing more than have his powers return to him. At least with magic by his side he’d finally be able to show Nik he wasn’t the only one with threats, he’d show him, he’d –

“Well, well, well,” came a new voice, “aren’t you a strange sight?”

Kol immediately turned his head to locate the mindless idiot that dared to interrupt his thoughts. Did humans devolve so pathetically that they no longer understood that when they see a soul wandering alone, that soul would likely be uninterested in any attempts of conversation? But looking at the individual who spoke to him, he was shocked beyond himself to witness such a devastatingly gorgeous woman before him. She had dark almond-shaped eyes and tall with legs that went on for miles. And her thick and illustrious raven waves practically flowed down the middle of her back like a black waterfall.

Dare he say it, this woman was almost as beautiful than him.  

But regardless of how pleasing her outward appearance may be, she still would not be spared from his fury.

Pity, he would have loved to wrap those legs around his waist if he were actually here.

The corners of the woman’s lips went upward, and the cupid’s bow of her mouth was slightly pursed as she smirked, making her lips look plumper and more bitable than how they had right to be in the Original’s opinion. It was only a few seconds before the succubus burst out laughing. Her entire body arched with her back as she simply couldn’t contain herself.

“I’m sorry,” she said once he began to calm down, “but I’m afraid that I happen to be very happily married. In fact, I have been for the past near seven thousand years.” After making a quick glance up and down Kol’s near transparent form, she continued with a cat-like grin. “And I highly doubt someone as woefully young as you could satisfy a woman like me.”

Oh, now he was offended. Not being able to satisfy– did this woman have any idea who she was talking to? The list of names of men and women that swore they only believed in Heaven when Kol fucked them was so long that it would wrap the Earth twice. And she better believe than each time was more than consensual – they were begging him very enthusiastically to say the least. Who was this lady to assume –

Wait, did she say seven thousand years?

As if she could hear his thoughts, all the woman did was smiled before extending her hand.

“I think I’d like it very much if you and I became friends.”

Extending his own, Kol was surprised to see that his hand didn’t just pass through like it normally would for most physical objects. He could actually grasp her hand and feel the warmth passing through it. For the first time in…forever, Kol felt warmth flooding through him. He stared into her eyes, wondering how on Earth someone could live for seven thousand years. Even if she had the gift of mediumship, his presence was too well-hidden for even the most gifted and powerful medium to sense him.

Kol had to know more of her. He’d go mad if he didn’t.

“What are you exactly?” he carefully asked.

He could sense that this person was a being of extreme power. In the top of her finger, she likely contained far more power than Nik could possibly imagine, even in his wildest dreams. It seemed that being an invisible soul floating in the wind had its perks after all. If he was alive, walking and about, he’d never come across this marvel of a woman.

“I’d prefer if you began that question with ‘who’ than ‘what,’ but I suppose that matters little in this situation. My name is Kaetlyn, I prefer Kaet for my friends, but you may know me better as-”

“Hekate,” he whispered in awe, “Goddess of Magic. Titaness Mother of Witches and Monsters.”

“Surprised in a good way I hope?” Kaet asked with one brow raised.

“More or less, but I did imagine you about 30 feet taller with the night sky for skin and two more heads.”

“Well,” she softly chuckled, “I hope I didn’t disappoint you with my appearance. Now I’ll forgive you just this once for interrupting me. But only if you allow me to take you to my home.”

“Oh?” Kol asked, a salacious grin spreading across his face. Now things were getting interesting.

“Save it Kol Mikaelson-” ordered the ancient goddess as she raised her hand to her face as she pointed at him in warning- “I am taking you to the village that I run with my husband. So, I suggest that you keep your hands to yourself because he has a nasty little habit of being showing exactly how off-limits I am to youngsters such as yourself.”

“I never told you my-”

“You were once a witch, and I am the mother of magic. All witches and their magic came from me, including you.”

It really was so unfair how good she looked while talking over him. Oh well, he might as well play along. Finally, something interesting was happening in his life.

“So, who is this husband of yours, darling? And how can you be so sure that your husband could be a threat to me? You know who I am, what I became. What makes you so sure that once I enter your village, I won’t use my ghostly ways to end him.”

When Kol finished, he immediately felt a shift in the air. It was as if the sun had disappeared and the jungle went silent. It seemed that the animals that served as their audience went dead silent as if they were in anticipation for his end. The kind and amiable mirth of the chthonic witch shifted to dangerous and cold.

Kol had lived for over 700 years and after everything he done and witnessed, he had never felt such chill run down his spine.

“Listen well,” she began – her tone laced with the power and authority that came from someone of her position, “I won’t try to humor you with answering that ridiculous question, nor do I intend to let you presume that my kindness can be mistaken for naivety. My husband is one with abilities as ancient and powerful as mine. If you truly knew what he was capable of, you’d be far more terrified of him than you ever were of your father. That being said, if you ever try to threaten my husband or even think about go so far to joke about it again, I promise you that I can produce torture and incite fear that would make the devil weep in pity for you.”

Oh fuck, even as a ghost, Kol should not have been as aroused by her threats as he was in that moment.

But soon the tension dissipated and warmth from the sun returned to pass through him once more.

“Now that we have that matter cleared up, we really should get going. The sun’s about to set and you never know what or who would be lurking at night.”

With that being the final word, The Good Lady of the Night and Shadows turned around and made her way back to where he presumed to be the location of her home village. And what else could he do but follow her by how the slight sway of her hips seemed to beckon him.

Threats and chills mixed a beautiful witch with magic more ancient than time itself, Kol couldn’t remember the last time he felt so alive.

Authors' Note: And when Kol enters the village, he tries to flirt with Kaet in front of Druig like a dumbass, and his soul gets a major ass-whooping.

Tagging: @ethereal-athalia, @valeskafics, @klauslove, @carolineforbae, @misssophiachase

Reblog and comment and like and share to anyone you think may like to read this fic!

[aethersea]

📓!

There’s an atla au of star wars that I have tried so hard to bend into a shape that I can actually write, but alas, all I have are ideas. This is the one that’s in the wips folder as Everything Changed when the Clones Attacked, which is ironic bc I cannot for the life of me figure out what to do with the clones. Maybe they’re being brainwashed at Lake Laogai? Or something???

Anyway. The story has two parts, prequels and sequels. Details under the cut, because this got a bit long.

In the prequels, the elderly Master Yoda of the airbenders is Avatar, and in his old age he’s stopped traveling the world and instead dispenses his wisdom from one of the great Air Nomad temples, nestled deep in the mountains where only Air Nomads can reach. He’s unofficial leader of the council of Air Nomad elders, which is….not great, really, not how things should be, but it’s mostly been okay. He’s been a good avatar overall, and it’s only in later years that he’s leaned so heavily toward the Air Nomads, and really none of this is enough to push the four peoples truly out of balance. 

Our story starts with Qui-gon Jinn, an airbending master traveling with his apprentice, helping a besieged queen from a minor Earth Kingdom escape her city. (I saw a post once asserting that the Earth Kingdom is actually a collection of largely autonomous kingdoms that all loosely recognize the authority of the Earth King in Ba Sing Se, and I like that a lot, so that’s the worldbuilding I’m going with here.) Qui-gon agrees to take Queen Amidala to the Avatar’s council to beg their aid. 

Along the way, they encounter a young boy living with his mother. The boy can do a bit of earthbending—and also a bit of waterbending, and a bit of airbending, and a bit of firebending. Which is impossible, because Avatar Yoda isn’t dead, but there he is, bending all the elements anyway.

I don’t think there’s slavery in the atla universe, but we could probably get away with indentured servitude of some kind, and Qui-gon acquires Ani in much the same way as he does in canon. He takes him to Avatar Yoda—and Yoda rejects him. Says, essentially, “This is weird as hell but it’s also not my problem.” (Frankly I can’t come up with an actual good reason for Yoda to do that, but just go with me here.) So Qui-gon angrily responds that if the Avatar won’t take responsibility, he will, and then gets himself enmeshed in Amidala’s political problems to boot. 

And then he dies.

Something something evil emperor, yadda yadda you know the drill. (Though I think the empire isn’t going to be the Fire Nation, despite the thematic appropriateness of fire spreading unchecked to consume all in its path. Palpatine is gonna usurp the Earth King, I think, and I do feel the prequels’ themes around entrenched systems with deep flaws, which are too big to fight as individuals and too implacable to change, will fit well with atla themes around earth.)

The sequels portion of things is even less plotted out. All I know is that Luke grows up in the same nameless patch of Earth territory his father grew up in, and he doesn’t actually discover he can waterbend until he’s practically an adult. It’s a shock to everyone—except, somehow, weird Old Ben who lives in the desert, who tells him that the next Avatar is supposed to be a waterbender, and won’t explain why he’s so convinced Luke is that Avatar given that he’s pretty emphatically not from the Water Tribes. 

Luke is finally convinced when he manages to airbend, under Old Ben’s suspiciously skilled tutelage. He can’t pull off any other elements, though, so they go off on a road trip to that swamp where you see spirits, to try to reach the past Avatars and get some guidance.

Meanwhile, unbeknownst to both of them, Leia has grown up knowing she can firebend. This is kind of an alarming skill for the princess of an Earth Kingdom to have, and even more alarming given that she’s already an earthbender. So she’s kept it secret, and no one but her parents has ever known.

They can meet in some way analogous to the Death Star raid in A New Hope, idk I have zero plot in mind here. The point, as far as I’m concerned, is that the Skywalkers have fundamentally broken the Avatar cycle. Anakin shouldn’t exist, and yet he does, and he was born while Yoda was still alive. If he hadn’t existed, the next Avatar would be a waterbender, and that’s Luke—except he’s from the Earth Kingdom. If Anakin is a true Avatar, then the next one would be an earthbender, and that’s Leia—only then she shouldn’t have been born until after Anakin’s death. Nothing makes sense! Even Yoda and all the other past Avatars together have no goddamn clue what is going on!

Imagine their consternation when they discover that neither Luke nor Leia is the Avatar: it’s actually both of them together. Luke has air and water, Leia has earth and fire; Luke can visit the spirit world and be the bridge between humans and spirits, and Leia can speak to kings and maintain the balance between the four nations. The two of them, together, can defeat their father, defeat the emperor, and restore harmony to the world.

[aq2003]

idk if you're still doing those top fives, but if so... top 5 nine moments? - variousqueerthings

5. "rose, i'm trying to resonate concrete" (can this become a euphemism for being ace/aro if we try hard enough btw. is he. you know. trying to resonate concrete)

4. suibaiting the dalek. she was so iconic for this one and i do feel bad for laughing bc it's such a serious scene, however it's a product of me seeing images like this so you cannot blame me:

3. the exchange he has with the married-couple-to-be in father's day. "and i know we're not important" "who says you're not important?" and "street corner, 2 in the morning, getting a taxi home. i've never had a life like that. [pauses] yes. :) i'll try and save you". i haven't watched classic who obv but as a jumping-off point for the show at nuwho it really hammers in the doctor's love and admiration for humanity so well. also i love how every innocent life no matter how seemingly small is so important to nine it's one of my fav things about him ever

2. "only a killer would know that." this scene fucking haunts me and god truly it is something only rtd could write. goofy villain from that goofy two-parter having a dark and twisted conversation with nine on how many people they've killed and how sparing/saving people feels in the wake of all that. hello

1. EVERYBODY LIVES ROSE, JUST THIS ONCE. EVERYBODY LIVES!!! i did not experience this scene organically fun fact. bc i watch the hbomberguy sherlock sucks video essay on a semi regular basis as background drawing noise so it was the entire basis of my doctor who knowledge for a while before going in. and even out of context from the limited explanation of what's going on from the video essay i was kind of struck by it, like!! wow!! this is such a good line and i haven't even watched the show. and of course in context it's even better, bc nine spends his whole run practically soaked in death, we see it from the start, and over the course of the season he bonds w rose and lets himself feel hope and joy and starts to heal and just this once everybody lives. so good. this scene is special to me and i love u nine forever

[thefamilycryptid]

MY HUGE RANT ABOUT SEASON 4

Spoilers ahead

This is going to be really rambly. It it is definitely not all of my thoughts on this season. I did have parts I liked about this season and I admit I sort of liked the ending of the season but I didn’t like the season as a whole and I like complaining so sorry this is long

First is was fat jokes at Diego, which was weird af, especially when he took of his shirt and showed he was RIPPED THE WHOLE FUCKING TIME LIKE NOT EVEN SLIGHTLY CHUBBY BRO WAS SUPERHERO JACKED???

I actually didn’t notice that it was Sparrow!Ben who got sent back with them at first, I was hoping and praying for my good ghost boy. I just kinda hates Ben’s whole character in this

Then it was constantly playing baby shark and NOONE DECIDES TO JUST SMASH THE RADIO??? Like if had played for just the first sequence then someone smashed the radio it would’ve been a bit funny but it took over a whole episode and I HATED IT

CGI vomit???? Constantly????? Also do the blood and guts look plastic to anyone else? Like practical gore usually looks pretty good why doesn’t just feel funky this season?

I liked the Jennifer plot line originally, but I feel like it just became a weird way to shoehorn Ben and Jen into a relationship.

You’re telling me that RAY CHESTNUT becomes a DEADBEAT DAD??? He was genuinely the sweetest guy season 2 and now we’re expected to believe he would just leave his wife and kid (I’m assuming Claire is his Bio kid in this, but even if he’s just her father legally it’s absolutely wack that he would just leave her and Allison).

The Klaus plot line was actually so upsetting this season. Like he screws around in every season but it’s usually tied back to the main plot somehow. But this time it literally just felt like “haha the gay addict relapses after YEARS of working so hard to remain sober”. They wrote it like it was some punchline, like we were meant to laugh about him being “haha funny comedic relief of Klaus never being able to have a happy life” and it didn’t even have any plot relevance?

And then the big one Five and Lila

I genuinely cannot express how disgusted I was with this plot line. The moment I started episode 5 I kept a literal chant of “oh god please no ” BEGGING that it was a fake setup.

But no they actually did that. They made Lila and Five have a weirdass emotional love affair while suspended in the bullshit time traveling train. I’m gonna break down specific thoughts I have about this incident just bc there is so much I have to say

1. The age gap of the characters. Lila is 35 (ish? Her time traveling is a lot less than five so we can assume she is roughly still 35) and Five is in his 60s mentally while being in the body of a 19yo (him being 13-14 in season 3 and the 6 year agegap). I feel like I shouldn’t have to explain the mental/maturity agegap between a 35yo and a 60yo.

2. There’s also the huge glaring problem of the actors ages. The fact that the writers waited until Aidan was FRESHLY legal to write him into a relationship with an actress 15 years older than him is actually disgusting. Especially considering Ritu knew Aidan since season 2 when he was 16 years old and she was in her 30s.

3. It completely ruins fives character as someone who spent several decades trying to figure out how to save his whole family, into a homewreaker who was completely ready to let his family deal with the apocalypse while he had a cushy old time in a cottage core life with his brothers wife. Five killed thousands of people for the chance to go home to his siblings and I’m just expected to believe that he would throw that away for his sister-in-law???

4. Lila is a kickass independent woman in seasons 2, 3, and in the beginning of season 4. She’s practically a single mother bc Diego’s head is up his ass, shes juggling taking care of 3 kids, having her extended family live with her, AND trying to feel normal again by playing spy in her free time. Yet after episode 5 she is reduced to a “woe is me I’m stuck between two brothers, one I’m married to and have 3 kids with, and the other I just think gets me so well even though he lied to me”. She is slightly redeemed after they get out of the train stop and returns to Diego but it was still gross that it happened in the first place and there are still weird aftershocks

Ok end of Lila and Five rant back to the other stuff

Loved Victor so much in this season btw, the only normal Hargreaves at this point. Wish we could’ve heard more about how he is apparently charming the pants off of every woman he meets, if he and Lila got together behind Diego’s back I don’t think I would’ve even been mad he simply is THAT BITCH and we love him for it.

The five Deli was actually kind of funny to me tbh. I just wish it had gone way differently, like yes definitely like all the Fives that gave up but I wish our five had solved the problem just to spite them all. Because that’s the POINT of Five’s character that he refuses to just give up on problems, even if he has to ham-fist his way through everything until he has the solution and this season just ruins that in him. Where is stubborn till the end Five?? Dead and season 4 killed him 😔

And then there was the ending.

I don’t like it for a bunch of reasons. But the main one was how sloppy it felt. Also a bunch of inconsistencies which I will once again breakdown

1. I didn’t like the whole “we must end our existence to save the timeline” solution. I feel like it’s just massively overdone and lazy writing. I honestly would’ve preferred never getting season 4 over this ending

2. Lila, Diego, and Allison being so worried about their kids being ok without them is such a weird point. Like if you cease to ever exist then your kids won’t have ever been born I think that’s the whole point of not existing???

3. This isn’t a complaint but the scene where Bennifer absorbs everyone else looks really weird to me idk why

The EPILOGUE!

I admit it was pretty cute to see all the characters from previous seasons appear again, I love the Swedes by baby girls.

But how the hell are the children alive when their parents ceased to exist?? Like genuinely how the hell does that work ??

I almost wished we could’ve gotten to see all the scenes from the mothers when they WOULDVE given birth but instead we get to see what happens without Marigold. It would’ve been a nice wrap up if we got to see the scene with Victors mom again but it’s just her swimming with the boy she’s hitting on. I feel like it would’ve been a slightly more satisfying ending that I could’ve forgiven the “erase ourselves for the good of everyone” ending.

I have more opinions so ask me abt them if you want but I promise this post would be a novels length if I said it all so I just wrote the big stuff here lol

[nicegaai]

im attempting my fic reread today. im announcing this bc i will be liveblogging to keep my morale up, NOT THAT anyone cares but i personally need this, like ill only commit to do the thing if theres an imaginary audience holding me accountable. & i like to have fun :3

anyway. captains log, its a beautiful sunny july weekend. i just finished my morning coffee, and, i am dreading this so much. i dont like rereading my own writing but i shall get over it. ok here we go.

Þetta Reddast vagueblogged directors commentary edition

Ch 1:

*opens fic and starts convulsing immediately* god i wish i smoked weed rn. i cannot chill out ever for the life of me

My Mission For Today Is: to remember what plot threads I’ve left hanging so I can resolve this story properly. And also try n remember where the flow is going. I have the end plotted out, I just am a little lost … it’s been a while :-(

------------

Abrupt beginning!!!! I’m not mad because I have . I HAD. Almost no writing experience when I started this. it isn’t ideal but I refuse to be one of those fanfic writers that starts rewriting early chapters without finishing the last ones. Ive never seen one of those types actually finish a longfic. …I’d already rather yap than actually read LMAO AHH

Oh this is worse than I remember. thats cool that s great ok alright *coughs up blood*

"20 somethings" WOW I really did not know where I was going with this when I started huh

LKJSDLKSJDLGKGDJSLDGJK ??? Who authorized this. Who let me cook. What the hell

I could write this better now. I could edit this into something beautiful. <- devil on my shoulder

FORGOT I WAS MAKING RICE BRB

"generously offered nothing to the exchange." wait STOPPPP. I’m so funny

GRAMMAR ERROR DETECTED why is there two periods. I’ll be coming back to fix that …………………. :-(((

Fuck. This is a lot. Marge Simpson Hiding Her Face dot Png

Oh this is stupid this is gayyy this is fukcinnn . Who fucking did t his. What was wrong with me,. This is so good actually. what was i ONNNN. 

Im gonna throw up and I don’t know if thats like/. A complimentary thing or if im just cringing that hard . Im feeling emotions. I love my OTPs..OT3~5? I love them so so much

Ok as much as im like “eww bad writing” this is .. dare I say, rly good in places. Not to suck my own dick but maybe all hope isnt lost and imposter syndrome is an illusion

Grammar mistake #2. Goddddddd. they should ban me from the archive for this

EMILLLLL EMIL EMIL EMIL HIIIIII BABYYYY EMILLL I LOVE UUUU AWWHUUGHH everyone clap for my bewoved baby bruvver right FUCKING now

Urghhh gritting my teeth… Im fully expecting the flow of events to start not making any gd sense. There’s no way this came together the way I hoped in my head and .... For real I was never able to read this all the way thru. this is my first time, lol. and it was all disjointed on the authorial end to say the least. Im scared T-T

Jlxjvklsdkjfsjlkdkjlsjklkljzsdkjlgaskljdgjklasljkgdljkasljkdgjklasjlkdgljkaskljdgjakl?????????? 

Im not liking the ratio of dialogue to whatever the other stuff is. scene-setting I guess. prose maybe. i could have dragged this out way longer... By which I mean made it a more satisfying read. But WHATEVER !!!! 

TIMO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TIMOOOOOOOOOO NUMERO UNOOOO DO MUNDOOOOOO I really need to utilize him more. As soon as I finish this fic I need to write a Timo POV spinoff where he gets cancelled on furry twitter for proshipping in real life

Hmmmm chapter ending didn’t hit as hard in practice as it did in drafts. Oh well. God damn that was a lot to happen in one chapter LMAOO???

OH SHIT MY RICE IS STILL COOKING —— 

[i-love-you-all]

For the valorant hc game could you do sova please?

Of course! Sova, my love <333

Also realizing how long these posts get so I've put the keep reading line in.

5 things they usually see:

A practice target (often those poor bots). His greatest fear is failure - a missed shot. It could determine the fate of his teammates or the world, so it cannot happen (again). As a result, he spends ungodly amounts of time training and working out. No mistake will be repeated on his watch.

Wildlife! It's already established that he enjoys photographing nature, so I imagine that he see trees, flowers and animals quite often.

Chess boards and pieces. He's a pretty avid chess players (same with Cypher so I imagine those two compete as often as Sova can stand the information broker).

Guns and other weapons. I HC him as being military/special ops then onto whatever the Brotherhood is. And before then I HC his family to be a military family so he's grown up seeing guns, learning how to use them... and using them himself.

Various shades of blue. I think it's a top 3 favourite colour of his (looking at the clothes he wears outside his armour). But I like to think that he got his walls painted blue at the protocol. And that he got some say in what he would wear out on his missions and whatnot. (because if we're being honest, if he does work up north in snow and stuff as shown in his card, he should be wearing arctic camo).

4 things they usually feel:

The cold. He grew up in a cold place and like his voiceline on icebox, he enjoys the cold as well. For the most part, he doesn't mind it, but when he's out for a long time, he does enjoy the warmth of a fire, or just a heated room.

The calluses on his hands and the weight of his bow. He's been trained since young with the bow and arrow, so his skin is not soft, and it's not perfect. However, it is who he is, so when he makes a fist or absentmindedly rubs his hands together, he feels them quite often. It's a permanent reminder of who he is.

His wet hair as he leaves the shower + all the cleaning and brushing he does for it. I think that he takes special care of his hair because it's like the one part of him that "stayed the same" throughout his life, or that it's the only thing that can't be scarred. He must have so many scars around his body (though I sometimes write him to have none bc he's that OP :p) and then he lost his eye, so the fact that his hair can still stay nice and soft must be something to treasure :))

The sore feeling you get after a workout. Whether he was injured on a mission or just after a hard day, he can feel that stiffness. Maybe there are days he wishes he was a radiant. Maybe then, all the physical strains he takes on wouldn't hurt as much. He knows the soreness will only get worse, no matter how great he is at keeping in shape. And that's when his admiration for Brimstone gets stronger because that man has been working through this for decades longer than he has.

3 things they usually hear:

His electro music. I'd like to think that maybe, the reason why he likes that genre more (from what you can hear on the playlist for him) is because the drums are softer/rounder. A loud hit on a snare might make him tense up a little too much because it can sound like a gunshot.

His breathing, and his efforts to control it. Snipers have to work to control how they breathe, so as he settles down into a sniper's position, he needs to be extra aware of his breath. Also, in worse times, he needs to calm himself down when he has a nightmare intense enough to make him jolt upright in the middle of the night. Thoughts of losing his eye again, or a mission that was failed because of his action - or lack of action, sometimes plague him, and he hates how he loses control for those few moments.

A cold wind/nature. I've already talked about him being out in the world and enjoying cold weather, but he likes to be closely attuned with all the possible and plausible sounds of nature. Not only is it a good way to calm himself down, but it's also great training. When he's alone out on a mission, he needs to know what are normal sounds and what could be an enemy trying to sneak up on him.

2 things they usually smell:

Nice, warm, tea in the morning. He would never admit it, and Cypher has no proof, but it is him that sometimes takes Cypher's teas. Especially when he doesn't have any of his own available at that moment.

Metal/nothing. Not metallic as in blood, but as in the general iron smell of a gun or his bow. It's clean and isn't really reflective of the scents in his everyday surroundings, which is what I mean by nothing. He can smell food, gas, or whiffs of perfume as he travels around cities. He can smell flowers, trees, and nature when he's outdoors. He can't smell anything in that armoury as he prepares to leave on a mission.

1 thing they usually taste:

Blood. I know it's kind of a cop out for any agent, but I think Sova more than most (maybe not deadlock or brimstone) just due to his history in this line of work. He has lived through war, assassinations, and straight fist and knife fights. He has hit others, and inadvertently tasted a bit of blood splatter, or he has been hard enough to taste some of his own blood in his mouth. I think he might be a medium steak kinda guy if he does go out because he doesn't want to be reminded of anything while enjoying a meal. Though, there are times where he's in that sort of mood and will order something medium rare and let himself taste just that little bit of blood.

[twistedlovelines]

I didn't think to ask until just now— how would you rank the TWST boys in order of how much you enjoy them (I'm assuming Deuce is pretty high up) versus how easy/fun it is for you to write for em?

I really like this imagine blog, hehe. It's so light-hearted & funny & silly. ^^

— 🐈‍⬛

!! im glad you enjoy my blog aoishdfi <333 its genuinely like my little diary lol, all the horny thoughts and ramblings go here <3

!!! Based on how much i enjoy them:

Trey (please...would drop to my knees for him asap i need him 2 take care of me abksdfj)

Deuce (he's so boyfriend coded it makes me sick)

Rook (he's such a freak. why would i not love him .)

Vil (tbh its not even in like. a sexual way. hes just goals LOL)

Idia (he's such a freaky loser. there's so much yandere/perv potential for him)

Azul (he's such a LOSERRRR . need his octopussy soo bad tbh)

Jamil (i need 2 bite him.)

Sebek (such a little bitch....i adore him and need to punt him)

Riddle (i need 2 hold him...)

Jade (smthn about him being so invested in the things he loves...husband material)

Ace (bastard . punting him as we speak)

Jack (dependable. strong. tsundere . what else do u need.)

Leona (depressed bitch? love.)

Kalim (he's so sweet and fun he's solid tbh)

Ruggie (love a resourceful bb <3 also really fun when i want sub! chara thoughts)

Floyd (his character is fun but not really one i'm attracted to qwq)

Lilia (he's fun!! need 2 have a movie night with him)

Silver (similar to jack. v good for somnophilia tho..)

Ortho (babyyyyy . such a mischievous little shit)

Epel (not my type physically or emotionally, but he's fun to bully lol)

Who is easier to write:

Deuce (I find his character pretty easy to grasp! as much as i do like writing him as a sub it's also fun to tap into his more protective aspects ^^)

Idia (he's so loser girlfail coded. genuinely would love to write for him more bc he's such a freak)

Trey (he's one of my faves...he's a fun, older brother type but there's also the more subtly vindictive or petty parts of himself that can turn sinister....)

Rook (i can relate to how he admires beauty tbh. genuinely i do find him inspiring in terms of finding beauty in everything and i think writing him makes me fall in love with life just a little bit more <3)

Azul (also a pathetic loser but also a chara that i have a pretty firm grasp on!)

Riddle (my precious love...i do have a soft spot for his character and i love writing him tbh)

Vil (another chara i can relate a lot with tbh. i get it . lowk i get kinda insane if i think about him too much ahsidf)

Jamil (my love...i want to practice writing his character more bc his character is so delicious 2 me)

Sebek (he's fun 2 bully!! so so fun to bully and also he's just so genuine underneath all the bravado...i love he)

Jack (also an earnest character, i find his character easier to write and he's just rlly interesting to me)

Ace (he's so. as much as he is a bastard he's also rlly fun to write in the ways he's pathetic. in the ways that he cares.)

Floyd (loveee writing silly stuff with him lol. might do more serious writing with him later on but im not sure)

Silver (knight archetype...that's all i need 2 say)

Leona (sometimes i write him and it gives me emotional damage. i love him more than you can imagine but god if i think about him too long...)

Jade (listen . he's fun but i just cannot sometimes osdfosdif.)

Ruggie - (i do enjoy his character but unless i get specific sub! ruggie worms he's generally not my type)

Lilia (listen...maybe its bc i havent fully caught up to book 7 but the spark just isnt there unfortunately. he's v fun to write in silly scenarios, though!)

Ortho (such a little bastard. i need to do more fun stuff w/ him tbh)

Epel (I do need to look back at his card vignettes but. his character isn't super intriguing to me so unfortunately he's pretty low on the list)

Kalim (he's nice!! fun!! but ultimately not super interesting to me compared to the others in the lineup)

[saetoru]

hiiii i hope you know how much i love ghe way u write haitham !!! also sooo true haitham is definitely autistic!! (me too haitham me too) i think u get how haitham is actually a quite kind and selfless person despite people think hes arrogant, egoistical and such but like if u read some if his voicelines like the one where hes asked what concerns he has he says smth not about him but how people tend to hurt themself and like cmon would an egoistical person have that concern??? also he doesnt look down on anyone its just he knows how capable he is and like ughhhh i feel like ur writing is a breath of fresh air cause like some people make it seem like hes some arrogant dude BUT HES NOT HES JUST AUTISTIC GUYS like when people say they dont like him and its just traits that autistic people usually have…. anyway thank you for sharing ur writing i love going through ur haitham tag it makes my day

HELLO HI I LITERALLY READ THIS LIKE 3 TIMES AND MY SMILE GOT SOOOO BIG EACH TIME IM GONNA TRY NOT TO RAMBLE AS I ANSWER THIS

but omg yesyesyes i agree he’s got so much pointing towards him being autistic and ppl will bash so many things ab him and it makes me so sad but also i’m like … maybe u ppl just don’t like traits that tend to describe autistic ppl idk … BUT i read so many fics of him being autistic and i see kaveh having adhd a lot in fics where they’re written to be neurodivergent and i think the authors i’ve read from so far have done such a good job of writing them and yeah. u get it. he’s definitely got sensory issues i know this is so real and true in my heart

AND HE IS SOOOOOOO KIND. i think ppl gloss over the fact that al-haitham doesn’t look down at anyone so much like everything about this man is so disciplined. so disciplined. like someone of his intelligence in a nation like sumeru could do sooo much bad but he literally just wants to have simple life where he goes to work and goes right home HE JUST WANTS PEACE. and his voice lines IF PPL WOULD JUST READ THEM. like the one about when ppl read difficult and abstruse books and then he says “jk i don’t enjoy watching ppl struggle lol” AND YES. THE ONE WHERE HE BASICALLY WOES ABOUR HOW PPL MAKE THEIR LIVES MORE DIFFICULT THAN IT NEEDS TK BE. he’s so caring by nature and i feel like even he doesn’t even understand that to some extent like i think he sees himself as a practical guy who just wants everyone to have peace for the sake of practicality. BUT HE ALSO JUST. CARES. YOU KNOW ?????????? they way it’s just canon that he’s misunderstood by ppl at the akademiya and he just doesn’t bother to correct them bc he doesn’t care to. THROWS UP HES SOOOOOOOOOO LOVELY I WISH MORE PPL WOULD SEE IT. i cannot tell u how many fics i read and then have to close bc. they just. THEY MAKE HIM SO ARROGANT AND MEAN BUT ARROGANCE =/= CONFIDENCE. he’s aware of his capabilities okay :( he’s not some condescending know it all. im just rly picky ab the way he’s written fjsjdjf so then i’m like. ok. i gotta write the content i wanna see 😔

but omg i’m rly glad you read and like my haitham writing sometimes i get carried away and make it so like…self servicing w the way i write him and the dialogue and then i get embarrassed to post it skfjsjfn but i’m very excited u like it I AM KISSINF U ON THE MOUF and also i am kissing ur brain for understanding him

[perdidosbucky-yyo]

I posted 2,819 times in 2022

That's 2,022 more posts than 2021!

556 posts created (20%)

2,263 posts reblogged (80%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@foreverindreamlandd

@kinanabinks

@buckycuddlebuddy

@treatbuckywkisses

@sweetascanbee

I tagged 1,368 of my posts in 2022

#digging up carrot's veggies 🥕 - 382 posts

#carrot's fic recs - 232 posts

#carrot and her fraaans - 93 posts

#carrot's corazón❣️ - 53 posts

#sebastian stan - 53 posts

#carrot's harvest - 52 posts

#carrot bong - 29 posts

#instagram - 26 posts

#spotify - 22 posts

#fruit basket - 22 posts

Longest Tag: 138 characters

#like it's so hard and it's weird bc i don't have this big tragedy on my shoulders i'm just a middle class young woman with a lot of issues

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

THE WAY I SCREAMED 👁️👄👁️

The things he says... That's gotta be on purpose right???? HE KNOWS THE POWER HE HOLDS

279 notes - Posted August 3, 2022

#4

Happy Birthday Sergeant

Drabble

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader

Summary: Bucky hates celebrating his birthday, that is until you forgot about it

Warnings: mention of a blowjob, lil bit of sadness, fluff but it's not that fluffy??

Wc: 1k

a/n: Today is TLOML's birthday and words cannot express just how special he is to me, Bucky Barnes deserves everything good in this life and I'm gonna give it to him <3, anyways, happy reading!

See the full post

291 notes - Posted March 10, 2022

#3

L.O.V.E

Pairing: Mob!Bucky x Plus size!Fem!Reader (no mention of ethnicity)

Summary: Bucky wants to offer you more than love

Warnings: underage drinking (reader is 20), a little low self esteem, self image issues, smutty (foreplay, implied oral and smut), tiny amount of angst, shitty father (not the reader’s), mention of a gun.

Wc: 4k

a/n: a little late buuut, Happy valentines everyone! I have very mixed feelings about this one lol, also,this was supossed to be pure fluff lmao, oh well… I hope you enjoy <3 And I would like to specify that the reader had a tough time figuring out what she wanted to do after high school so that’s why she JUST applied for collage (it’s ok to not know what you want for your life, there’s no rush, you get to choose your own path).

See the full post

352 notes - Posted February 16, 2022

#2

DᵣₑₐₘₗₐₙD

Pairing: DBF!Lloyd Hansen x Fem!Reader(no mention of ethnicity)

Summary: You thought you were happy, you thought you’d never see him again… you were wrong.

w/c: 4.8k

Warnings: smut (needy/semi-rough sex), Possessive behaviour, lil bit toxic relationship, mention of a blowjob,  degradation kink, barely noticeable dumbification, cheating(not on reader) , big age difference, Reader is in mid 20s and Lloyd is in late 40s(in flashbacks reader is 19-21), please let me know if I missed anything <3

a/n: a few days ago I dreamed that Chris Evans fucked me real good right after my wedding(don't even remember who I married lmao), that’s the first dream I’ve remembered in YEARS so I had to turn it into a fic, plus @camilledove @forever-aria @buckys-bitchhh practically BEGGED(literally just asked once) me to write this, this is for them <3

this is not beta'd, any and all mistakes are my own, I'm sorry if this fic gets confusing.

See the full post

963 notes - Posted July 29, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Im about to throw a fit 😤

1,013 notes - Posted February 25, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[rangedreign]

ohhh my favourite part of ask games, (harmless) petty fandom drama. i know these are a lot so ofc feel free to pick and choose but im nosy and love gossip so if you feel like it *eyes emoji*:

1 2 (just for the drama lol) 6 (feel free to ignore i understand u completely but i live for drama lol) 7 (MORE) 8 12 (<3) 16 (*eyes emoji*) 21 22 (for some final positivity)

1 - the character everyone gets wrong cedric the sorcerer. he deserves respect as a person, and the royal family was wrong to deny him that, but he does little to earn respect as royal sorcerer. 'oh he has such a good and relatable arc' whup tee doo his grand finale was... *checks notes* doing his job correctly. the one he's been training for his whole life. color me unimpressed by a character that should have either left that job YEARS ago or put a little effort into anticipating what he'd be asked to do and practicing instead of trying to prove his worth through stunts and domination.

2 - a compelling argument for why your fave would never top or bottom can't do it lol, everyone's a verse in my mind

6 - which ship fans are the most annoying? shoutout to the time i went through the snape/lily tag and couldn't scroll 3 posts without a james/lily shipper trying to pull moral rank. however i think 75% of the hp fandom has ship rabies.

7 - what character did you begin to hate not because of canon but because how how the fandom acts about them? eh, none, i don't let fandom influence my interpretations of characters that way. cedric is closest but the fandom misinterpretation is just an additional annoyance, rather than a driving force

8 - common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about 'cedric and sofia have a good relationship'. shipping or not, they're completely one-sided. what does cedric provide sofia with? he doesn't even listen to her particularly well.

12 - the unpopular character that you actually like and why more people should like them to no one's surprise, my first pick here is wormwood from sofia the first. he was created as a joke, ha ha the pet is smarter than the human master, but then the show makes you judge him by human moral standards as the foil to cedric's 'deserving of second chances'. the show itself asks you to view a character that cannot leave servitude as human, and wants you to believe that his station is right. it's so deeply unfair. i care him. i respect him. i want to see him take the power of humanity for himself, abuse it, naturally, because that's all humans have ever done to him, then grow into a complete person when he realizes he cares despite it all. knowing that, i feel like mentioning areelu should come as no surprise. doing great evil in response to evil that was done to you? that's so up my alley. up my pussy even. making her bond with daeran of all people is such a great idea, someone who cannot forgive her, but must move on and work with her regardless. it seems like most people write her off as too evil to live, but she's still a super genius. there's a lot to be gained by befriending her. the gold dragon ""redemption"" happens so absurdly fast though. 'oh shit guess this is pretty fucked up, so glad you're a piss-colored lizard bc that's the only way i'd ever listen to you' wrath's writing in general has a bit of a quantity over quality issue. a lacking-logic issue. no way my azata would sacrifice herself just cuz without knowing what areelu will do once she's gone.

16 - you can't understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc) - hero-type main characters in general. idk exactly what it is but i find most of them very dull, and often irritating. a lack of desires beyond duty? can't often be described as freaks? they just never have any footholds for interesting ideas to me. - gold aasimar cum. if you want something golden to come out of daeran's dick, you can just make him piss XD also does that imply his hair is naturally white? - daeran x chill/lawful/'boring' kcs - i can tell that on some level he wants the stability from people like that, but i can't see him actually bonding with them. esp not towards the start of the game. - truly, utterly pathetic meow meows. like, listen, i love shoving a character into a Situation and watching them flounder around, but they've gotta be proficient at something!

21 - part of canon you think is overhyped for just about everything: the worldbuilding. i think people get impressed by the mere existence of worldbuilding, rather than the quality of it. pf surprised me when i looked deeper into stuff and found it gave me the same 'this is a hot mess and i have to make shit up for it to make sense' feeling as stf. i expected better from a massive ttrpg but ok. for wrath, also the characters and the music. the characters rely on one-note personalities with maybe a ~hint~ of spice, with one extremely notable exception of daeran. the degree to which he beats out every other character in complexity is stunning, really. the music is... just fine? it's not amazing, it does exactly what you'd expect a track for that purpose to do. I think most of the tracks have muddy orchestration, too much focus on harmony/vibes and not enough on rhythm and melody. the one track i really love is 'a drink before the battle', it has a great flow and dynamics and i wish it played more often.

22 - your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores the villains/antagonists, best part of literally any media ever

[unlimitedhorsepower]

Tagged by: @thevoiceofthanatos​

Favorite color: warm bright yellow, mustard yellow & old gold, and just yellow in general. its a good colour. it makes me happy

Currently reading: idk, probably star trek fanfic my friend @rubbertplant​ was writing to give my opinion on it. i often read through my own stuff too lol, like whoah i wrote that??? ADHD has taken everything from me including my capability to read though, for real. ive been thinking of trying to listen to some audiobooks recently though, this cannot continue... its just that i also have no ears disease so idk how well that would go. determined to try though

Last song you listened to: havent been listening to music so much bc ive been playing videos instead but my last.fm has all my spotify listens so itll stay up to date on whatever i listened to last. currently seems to be “please play-bite” by pinocchioP. i often just let spotify play me whatever it recommends anyhow so theres variance. and i only started this account like a few months ago max so its not really a full picture of my music-listening

Last movie (in theaters): its not really a movie, but if it counts, the first ginga nagareboshi gin stageplay (recorded and released in finland in theaters with subs)

ginga was always huge in finland for some reason. idk. the anime is so violent though that i got really afraid of bears for some reason. theres so much blood... i never read the manga either i just knew of the anime and partook in my share of wolf roleplays (dogs were uncool! so i didnt do dog roleplays. iirc that really was my reason).

heres some funny wolves from my wolf rp days

2010. one of the first things i coloured digitally... i painstakingly cleaned the scanned pencil lineart with a mouse

2011. i had gotten my first drawing tablet as a birthday/xmas gift and practiced a ton around this time (more than just wolves lol)

Last series I watched: trigun stampede. even changed my phone bg into vash... but millions knives is probably my favourite. he just does everything wrong and makes his life worse. and everyone elses life too bc he sucks. but hes multifaceted so hes also my meow meow and whatever. i hope a ford explorer drives over him

if it counts though, ive seen some star trek TOS episodes and movies because my friends have been watching them. im not super into it but its always fun to hang. i also dont watch a lot of stuff. i dont even know what i do. guy who doesnt read or watch things but listens to jerma videos on youtube without actually looking at them while i “draw” and “write”

Craving: food honestly. i should cook something lmfao. i also want soda so bad but i dont have any. id make some tea but its disgustingly warm in my house so i only want cool drinks. could kill for a nice milkshake or a smoothie rn i think

Tea or coffee: tea... im the only finnish person who doesnt drink coffee for real. also got really into loose leaf tea bc i befriended a chinese lady who is really into tea and has a tea shop in the city near where i live

Currently working on: drawing this and trying to think how i want to do it. somehow want to incorporate flat colours and maybe shade his body naturally, and make the blood look realistic instead of flat colours... hmm not sure yet what i want to do

other than that im trying to proofread the chapter of my ryanyuri fanfic i already published because theres a lot of typos and strange sentences in there but its been a chore bc my body breaks down when it gets too warm smfh... not looking forward to when my apt goes over 30 degrees celsius it is unlivable. im also trying to complete a “lookbook” of my tnb sims. but i always start huge projects that take three million years to complete and im really slow lmfao

Tag people you’d like to get to know better: i could just ask these questions from everyone i talk on discord with. fuck my friends i know irl or otherwise, only asking people who r my friends through tumblr. no need to do this though. also this isnt probably meant to be answered so long-windedly... thats just me. i cant answer with one word i gotta write an essay. heres three tags though @basslinegrave​ @vita-divata​

(record scratch before 3rd tag) and @rubbertplant​ bc they were streaming a game in discord when i started typing this and i was like hey wanna do it and they were like yeah

i expect replies on my desk by 5pm TOMORROW!!!!get to work!!!! no i jest, do it or dont, i dont mind either way, just if you feel like doing this. if you see this and want to do it feel free to consider yourself tagged. godspeed

[brother-emperors]

Could you please write some more facts/thoughts about ascanio&ludovico's relationship? (or really any other sforza-related thing - that is if you want to, ofc)

I also adore your blog, I was so happy when I found another sforza enthusiast! And your art is gorgeous as well :)

yes yes YES 👏👏👏 I absolutely can, I spend. a lot of time thinking about the Sforzas/Ascanio. (also tysm anon!!! 💓💖💞)

A General Preface: at least half of the texts I'll cite are going to be in italian for obvious reasons (and for less obvious reasons, on the absence of english scholarship on Milanese history: here), and I do not translate*, so where I can, I'll try to provide english texts discussing the event as an attempt at a middle ground

I will be sticking to Ascanio and Ludovico (and probably mostly Ascanio) because if I start talking about the Sforza family as a whole, I'll dive really deep into Leonardo da Vinci's time in Milan, or the impact they had on the arts, or Galeazzo Maria Sforza and tennis, or I'll get started on Milan's history of plague protocols and how they came to the conclusion that illnesses were spread through contact and created an early form of contact tracing on top of everything else. Shout out to the Viscontis, I would LOVE to have you in charge of the country I'm living in right now bc I sure do hate it here.

Contagion Theory and Contagion Practice in Fifteenth Century Milan, Ann G. Carmichael

so. Ascanio and Ludovico are interesting. Ascanio is his mother's son in a couple of ways: in 1448, Francesco Sforza was in Pavia, and Venice attacked Cremona, so Bianca Visconti put on parade armor, pulled together the some troops, and defended city, and later would go on to handle the administrative affairs of Milan when Francesco was either away or ill. (there is a set of armor out there that is may have been commissioned by Ascanio, but either way it's attributed to him

(this link goes to a power point pdf from the University of Milan because, and I cannot emphasize this enough, it is Difficult to get a hold of italian books where I live without paying an arm and a leg for shipping)

Now! if we look slightly to the left at Ascanio. Here's someone who path in life has already been more or less set in stone on the basis of his birth (second youngest son in a set of 8 children): getting married to the Catholic Church. (There was a brief moment where he was considered for a political alliance marriage, but it fell through) One time he declared he would rather be a military captain, but. well. it's Cardinal Ascanio Maria Sforza for a reason.

Popes, Cardinals and War: The Military Church in Renaissance and Early Modern Europe, David Chambers

Politics and Dynasty: Underaged Cardinals, 1420-1605, Jennifer Mara DeSilva

And I'll now put the rest of this under a cut because this gets long.

Okay, so: didn't work because Ludovico still married him off to the Church (there was a good reason for this, since Milan's power structure was shaky after Galeazzo's death, and having someone in a position of power with Milan's interests at heart in the Vatican would be a good strategic move since a lot of Italian politics played out in Vatican rooms)

Ascanio Maria Sforza: la parabola politica di un cardinale-principe del Rinascimento, Marco Pellegrini

but not before Ascanio decided to go in with the father-son relationship comparison. so. that was something.

Ascanio Maria Sforza: la parabola politica di un cardinale-principe del Rinascimento, Marco Pellegrini

Ascanio did go on to raise and fund armies for his brother's causes as cardinal (king shit tbh, since the cardinalate was supposed to function as an extension of the pope) in direct opposition to the Church's position and in defiance of the pope, and also worked the political scene in favor for Milan constantly (there is a definable faction of cardinals that are associated with Ascanio, and by extension of Ascanio, Milan), so in a way he did get to play at being a military captain, on top of everything else he was doing.

Popes, Cardinals and War: The Military Church in Renaissance and Early Modern Europe, David Chambers

anyway, Ascanio traded his compliance with Ludovico's wishes for a fuck ton of money.

Ascanio Maria Sforza: la parabola politica di un cardinale-principe del Rinascimento, Marco Pellegrini

on the topic of Ascanio and Money, the Marco Pellegrini biography talks about Rodrigo Borgia won Ascanio in the conclave vote with money and it's. Interesting.

Ascanio Maria Sforza: la parabola politica di un cardinale-principe del Rinascimento, Marco Pellegrini

(It also goes on to say that Ascanio played literally everyone in the Vatican court like a fiddle, so that scene in Showtime's Borgias show where della Roveer talks about Ascanio playing the cardinals against each other before taking down the one left standing without breaking a sweat was accurate, actually)

There is something™ Gender Adjacent to being Socially Othered

Popes, Cardinals and War: The Military Church in Renaissance and Early Modern Europe, D.S. Chambers

and while we won't forget that Ascanio was a rich motherfucker and Milanese nobility on top of being a cardinal prince (Catholic cardinals existed in a similar function to a secular Prince for reasons of politic, since the Church was (is) a political entity), regional prejudices, city-state-kingdom bickering, and like. uh. well all of That with Ascanio and della Rovere. did exist.

Ascanio Maria Sforza: la parabola politica di un cardinale-principe del Rinascimento, Marco Pellegrini

and now to jump to the year 1497, which sure was a year that happened! Ludovico's wife Beatrice d'Este dies, and within a very close time frame, his brother Ascanio falls seriously ill**.

Like, ill enough that he tries to change his will, and Rodrigo Borgia refuses to finalize it because he's betting on Ascanio dying and being able to seize his assets on his death to fund Cesare's adventures (there is a letter in which Cesare complains that the two cardinals they were hoping would die did not, in fact, die).

Ascanio Maria Sforza: la parabola politica di un cardinale-principe del Rinascimento, Marco Pellegrini

A Companion to the Early Modern Cardinal

Rodrigo wasn't exactly wrong to hedge his bets on Ascanio dying, it was pretty bad! Everyone except the Sforza family thought he was dead for sure

Ascanio Maria Sforza: la parabola politica di un cardinale-principe del Rinascimento, Marco Pellegrini

That said, I'm still killing Rodrigo with my mind. It's not enough that he's already dead, I need to go Doom Guy on him in hell.

Ludovico sends a physician from Milan to Rome, and the King of Naples sends his own personal physician.

Ascanio Maria Sforza: la parabola politica di un cardinale-principe del Rinascimento, Marco Pellegrini

While Ascanio's fate is unsure, Ludovico begins making plans to have Ascanio's body brought back to Milan to be interred in Santa Maria delle Grazie, which is where Ludovico's wife had been buried. And if you just. look a little to the right. Ludovico's reaction to Beatrice d'Este's death. Was A Lot. As in Ludovico spent more time in the Santa Maria delle Grazie than he did in his own home. There is a definitive before and after with Ludovico as a person, and the event that marks it is the death of Beatrice.

Ascanio Maria Sforza: la parabola politica di un cardinale-principe del Rinascimento, Marco Pellegrini

Great news, unless you're Cesare or Rodrigo Borgia! Ascanio doesn't die!

Ascanio Maria Sforza: la parabola politica di un cardinale-principe del Rinascimento, Marco Pellegrini

After, when Ascanio began recovering/Ludovico heard his brother was on the mend, they respectively poured a truly spectacular amount of money into the arts, donations, charitable works, and so forth.

Ascanio Maria Sforza: la parabola politica di un cardinale-principe del Rinascimento, Marco Pellegrini

This is....getting very long so I'm going to end it here, before I start talking about Ascanio's relationship with Bernardino Lonati, with my favorite piece of Ascanio trivia (besides his entire life): he had a baton of command that had a hidden dagger built into it, which was very sexy and fun of him!! also he was considered a prime suspect in the murder of Juan Borgia, Duke of Gandia. and----

*Ah! you might say. Cardinal! haven't you said you're translating the Ascanio biography? Yes! it's not good! since it's largely for my own reference, it's very clunky and blunt, like oh my god I cannot emphasize how clunky it is. professional translators deserve to have stacks of cash thrown at them.

**So several scholars attribute this to syphilis on the grounds that Sanuto writes that Ascanio was afflicted with the French Disease, and there are a number of problems with this assumption, starting with the fact that Sanuto wasn't one of the physicians or doctors attending to Ascanio and that we have records from those people that should be treated as a primary source before fucking Sanuto. Also the immediate assumption that the French Disease automatically is syphilis is problematic because the diagnosing process of the time period meant that several other illnesses could all be diagnosed as the French Disease without it being syphilis. The physical signs of syphilis weren't mysterious or unknown either, and the timeline/symptoms/length of time Ascanio was ill and spent recovering vs the conclusions scholars have reached citing only Sanuto isn't enough for me. But also take all of this with a grain of salt, I went to art school and all I have on my side is uh. like a decade long obsession with how plagues and diseases spread throughout history, coupled with an interest in historical medical practices, which does not make me an academic or a historian or scholar by any stretch of the imagination.

Gender, Sexuality, and Syphilis in Early Modern Venice, Laura J. McGough