#also to say i love you sometimes. some ppl it’s really easy and we do it all the time. others i can’t bc it crosses boundaries and it

[pepprs]

i know i need to shut up abt it esp bc i don’t know for sure if i actually got exposed to covid but like. it’s just so fucking frustrating and terrifying. not just in the case of covid but with other things too like driving. you can take every precaution to keep yourself and the people around you safe but all it takes is one selfish careless asshole who can negate that in a heartbeat and ruin your life or maybe even end it in some circumstances. lol

[peapod20001]

When I love a song, I’ll love it forever

[seawitchkaraoke]

I will say this one more thing about this: I do not believe the other try guys (or even many people at 2nd try) knew Ned was cheating before they found out sometime earlier this month. Not because I have some blind faith in the other guys to be good ppl (imagine saying ‘‘he would never’‘ when someone you might have said that about literally just did smth horrible), but because:

- knowing he is cheating and hiding it/keeping him on would be an absolutely ridiculously stupid thing to do and I think they’re smarter than that. Because with how well known they are, that’s a ticking time bomb until someone will snap an incriminating picture in public and if it then comes out you’ve known and protected him? That’s your image of wholesome, good guys absolutely destroyed.

- all the claims that they did know for months or years, that i’ve seen came from random twitter or reddit accounts or were even entirely anonymous. That’s not evidence. That’s some random person saying some random shit

- they were already cutting him out of videos before the video was leaked. Meaning they were already preparing to cut ties with him regardless of whether the fact he was cheating came out or not so ‘‘oh they just have to fire him now bc it got out’‘ doesn’t really make sense.

- if him cheating was somehow an ‘‘open secret that the entire company knew’‘ it wouldn’t stay secret long. Nothing ever does if a lot of people know about it . You ever try to plan a surprise party for someone without someone tattling? This is this except tattling would seem like the more moral option to many ppl and make it even more likely that someone tells so again hiding it in that case is just a stupid strategy even with NDAs (bc your employee could leave instead of signing said nda or they could just hide their tracks well while leaking smth)

Now I will believe that they quite possibly weren’t planning on telling the public why they got rid of Ned, both to protect Ariel and others from harrassment and to protect their own image - any dirt on Ned also harms them bc if one of the wholesome good guys isn’t actually all that, maybe the others aren’t either. If the video wasn’t leaked I imagine they’d have been vague or said it was for personal reasons or whatever, but they still would have seperated from Ned.

I also think like.... listen, you can know your friend has flaws and maybe sometimes flirts too much when he’s drunk or sometimes says inappropriate shit and you can forgive him that and still be friends with him and try to push him in a better direction, you can do all that and never suspect he might be cheating. Because there’s a big jump from one to the other and we always see the best in the people we love. It’s easy to say in retrospect that it was obvious but shit like this is never obvious. You don’t suspect your friends of being capable of that stuff unless it’s pushed right in your face

[starfxkr]

hmmm can we talk abt the mommy issues jj and john b have 🙏🏻🤣

omg I actually have touched on this but I don't think jj has a mother wound...like its barely there if at all. most of it is due to the confusion of exactly when his mom left but its implied he doesnt really know her? the most we get of that is his dad saying jj reminds him of her but I don't think that effected jj the way ppl think. I think it was more...recognizing that Luke very well does love him but he needs some sort of excuse to brush off his abuse. jj is also fulfilled emotionally with his found family he doesn't really need a mother imo.

John b is more complex because we see his picture of her, we know he left when he was a kid but old enough to remember it and he vaguely knows where she is sometimes so it implies some sort of communication but clearly low effort on her part. I think that his mommy issues manifest in a fear of abandonment. we also see hes very parentified because of how.....emotionally neglectful and immature for lack of a better term big John is. john b has been forced to raise himself and apart from the obvious reasons he clung onto his dad being alive we also see him frequently get defensive over the thought his dad left because he didn't care about him and thought the gold was more important than him. you don't just get that sort of wound without past experience because its so specific. I think his mother wound manifests in him being very all or nothing in all his relationships, fear of abandonment and the way we see him constantly have to take care of himself emotionally because he has no adults do. not to say the Pogues don't help but those are his peers, he needed a parent. like its easy to forget hes essentially an orphan.

[skz-maybe-incorrects]

Here's A Little Get-To-Know-You Tag Game!

Tagged by: de wonderfulest ppl @noonaracha @straykidsgallery and @itsstraykids thank you sm!!! (go appreciate their cool point stories!)

Name(s): juni! is what i decided. some friends on this hellsite also call me solar so wtv u prefer. atp i just have a bunch of nicknames bcs i also have a Weird Name, A Weirder (Family) Nickname in real life

Pronouns: he/she/they/it<3 when i say feel free. pls and thank u

Star Sign: libra, right when it starts (and just a day after seungmin's!)

#of Siblings And Fun Facts About Them(if u have any): one (1) younger gremlin brother, and the funnest fact abt them is that he has been a walking directory of telephone no's since he was 4 and now can be relied upon to calculate large numbers inside his head in point seconds. Still hates physics(and most things theory)> by which, he also stores insane and inane amount of stats info (abt all types of things, but mostly sports) inside his head ready to be flourished at a moments notice, which is mildly impressive when ur 6 and debating with college students the scores of a game that happened 15yrs before u were born but not now when ur 17 and ppl are more focused on your test scores rather than ones u know, so</3 also has his birthday on changbin's but he doesnt know abt that

#of Pets: there's a history there. with fishes that my ma deceived me with on my 12th birthday(when i asked for a pet, i imagined smth i could hold) and then liked too much herself that we had them for 5yrs. three times; birds, but my brother kind of freed them while singing a lullaby with only me as an unbelieving witness. a dog (belovedest of em all) my dad picked from street as a puppy and who, then, had to be given away after 3yrs bcs of Stupid Reasons im still mad abt. now i just have street cats showing up at my front door to safekeep their babies on my staircase's isolated nooks till they grow up and vanish and street dogs who believe i have endless supplies of treats and show me sad faces when i dont. i really want a pet</3 but for now im contending with pictures of kitties whose moms operate on strict 'see-dont-touch' policies and sweet sweet strays who like to befriend u too easy.

Fandoms: many, but rn im active mostly in skz and mxtx. id love to be in other stuff i read and watch but since Capitalism hates me dearly,,,

Favorite Color: darker shades of all and any colors(esp blue green and red)!!! can be relied upon immensely to look warm and pretty always

Favorite Song: picking favorites for anything is out of my capabilities. also am just listening to my favorite bollywood playlist a lot these days.

Favorite Author: have a working list of favorite poets that does not end at 1. have not read a book seriously in four years of exam/prep-locking. but even if i did, idt ill be able to pick any favorite bcs, yk. good things in many things. (tldr; its roald dahl) (and ruskin bond who i read when i was 5 and still read when im so tired bcs his stories inspire me to write always)

Hobbies: I dance(perform) sometimes? I write??(←derogatory, dubious) make stuff, mostly poems and stories and tinker with free things i can do, both online or craft. analysis of things with friends is a beloved activity. i liek yoga and stretching (rn in an ongoing war with 3° winter mornings to drag myself out of bed and go to class at 6) cooking when i have time but mostly, always, reading (or! watching) stories, poems and learning abt cool nonfiction things (does crying abt fiction count)

Favorite Holiday: none of the above its the trips and getaways u make for yourself. all my beloved memories are always mostly from when our family makes a trip to someplace my mom insists or there's a non-worrying emergency to go somewhere. just family getting together under some pretense, even tho it is stressful as fuck.

Do You Have Any Partner(s): persuading my best friend atm but sadly she's straight</3(no lmao)

Fun facts about you/anything extra you wanna share!: since im having it rn- coffee doesnt keep me up or sometimes even makes me nod off, a fact i discovered after my 14yr old brain had the brilliant idea to try out the cool, forbidden drink after dinner knowing i wasnt allowed to. this is not fun to my ma but growing up in a sort of restrictive household, im also just weirdly good at sneaking and doing stuff im not supposed to without getting caught. i also do not know how to talk in lesser words. this is an absolute curse, yes i have tried. beware</3

this^ is a mess but thank u i had fun!! lemme tag: @winterfloral @syannie @hyunhomoons @quokki @chogiwow @agibbangs @rainknow @lixence @hyunebear @straykidsgallery @jerirose @ambivartence @hongjoongpresent + anyone who wishes to! apologies if tagged already!

[toastsnaffler]

Would love to hear ur thoughts on Hades game sometime because I too loved but had beef with the game and I think we are the same ….

yessss, disclaimer I haven't played it for like 3 years and I only played 10 hours/got to the end once before I dropped it so i might be misremembering some things but I stick by my opinions! under the cut cuz this is long as fuck 🫣 my haterism has no limits

ok so basically my grievances w hades can be split into 2 main areas: gameplay + narrative, I'll break them down in that order.

firstly gameplay - roguelikes/lites are my fave genre so I was predominantly approaching hades from this angle + its failure here is the clincher for me.

I found the gameplay repetitive and stale. this isnt a criticism of its permadeath like ive seen some ppl make - I usually relish repetition/grind especially in permadeath-based games bc I find tactical challenge fun + love the learning curve, its soooo rewarding. but hades is ultimately just a glorified button masher. mob/boss movesets are boring + unoriginal, and can generally all be fought the same way. trying to do otherwise drags out fights; it actively discourages emergent gameplay so theres little variance WITHIN runs. the pool of rooms for procedural generation is far too small so theres little variance BETWEEN runs. there's no real challenge to combat, difficulty is mainly increased by heightened mob tankiness as you get further in a run. movement/combat doesn't flow well, its mechanically very weak, relying heavily on its permanent upgrade system instead of developing skill in the way you approach the game. all the weapons feel clunky and don't really offer any unique challenge/benefit so theres virtually no point switching between them and the grind to unlock them all is so pointless… god there are just SOOO many hack n slash crawlers that keep it fresh even for hundreds of hours and hades fails miserably at keeping it fresh for even 5 measly hours :^/

I didnt like the boon system either - its far too simplistic + shallow. its fine to rely on chance, this is part of the random generation, and I think it had a lot of potential in that it was a good way of combining aesthetic w gameplay itself. but this is pretty much the only form of resource management - and theres barely any management to it! theres no reward for exploring different builds, they dont really synergise BETWEEN gods in interesting or useful ways, so the game encourages you to just stick with one god throughout, and biases random generation towards boons youve already collected. part of the fun for me is learning HOW to design a build, and working with the randomiser to play flexibly, but hades just isnt interested in that at all...

also - I don't like the permanent upgrade system, I think this detracts from it as a rogue. every time you should be starting on square 1 - maybe you pick up health upgrades etc throughout each run, and maybe you unlock new weapons etc for the random generation pool, or purely cosmetic upgrades, but the point of permadeath is that it RESETS! zags base health + dmg should be the same 50 hours into the game as when u first open it. make a different genre of game if u dont wanna do that lol. I also think IF youre going to say fuck it and add a permanent upgrade system, you should also add unlockable permanent biome shortcuts bc ur just making it boring as fuck to have to waste time grinding thru earlier biomes with unskippable combat once youre op for them.

I GET that they did this to make the game more accessible* to players who dont typically enjoy rogues, but it just makes it really disappointing for those of us who DO love rogues, and it always feels cheap to me when games are like "well of you want challenge then set the difficulty yourself with these modifiers 🙄" like just make the base difficulty TOUGH up front and then add an easy/story mode and accessibility features* for players who don't want the challenge.. if you're gonna call yourself a rogue the gameplay should be the PRIORITY not a throwaway option

one of my biggest peeves with hades is how people now laud it as one of the best rogues - whenever I mention I like the genre I almost always get asked "oh, like hades?" and it pisses me off so much… its a rogueLITE not roguelike, ie. it has rogue ELEMENTS but its not a true one and imo, it does a pretty shit job implementing them! I would have a lot less resentment towards it if it wasnt marketed as the forefront of the rogue genre - frankly its a very basic rogue with very mid gameplay, its characters/design are by FAR its strong point and it should be sold as such. its misleading and makes me sad that this is what most people think of when they hear rogue :-(

*(side note - accessibility in this game is another major flaw. theres really no excuse for a game as popular as this to be so lacking in accessibility options. allow people to bind keys together or use coloured outlines or have colourblindness settings or alter font/text size etc - its not that hard! dead cells did a great job of this lol)

anyway... moving onto my second criticism - narratively, its also unsatisfying.

the hades plot is, loosely, about a cycle of abuse, so the 2 natural directions to go in with this are either: #1: escaping the cycle, or #2: continuing it forever.

#2 is the easiest to do with a rogue format - bc of permadeath the game is already cyclical, so all you have to do is create an ending which loops perfectly back to the start (smth like 'its impossible to truly defeat/reconcile with his father so even after zag beats him, hades drags him back to the start again). obviously this is a miserable story to tell, but tbh I think it wouldve been interesting + fitting - so much of greek mythos is about cycles and the unchanging nature of the gods, and they LOVED eternal cyclical punishments. plus theres smth rly tragic about zag gradually helping everyone else while no one else can save him from his family LOL

#1 is a bit harder to do - this is the story they WANTED to tell but I just don't think it worked… the driving force plot-wise is his desperation to escape. realistically for this to happen the game needs to be finite, which it can't be due to its rogue nature - somehow you have to end up at the very start again. the main solutions I can think of for this are:

a) after the final boss, insert some time travel shenanigans (easy to fit into the worldbuilding using a character like kronos) and all of zags progress with hades is unspooled. this can be completely out of his control, or it could be a choice the player makes (to end the game here or choose to go back and relive zags past in order to progress npc questlines). eg. what happens in dead cells. again, tragic but it makes more sense to me

-or b) bite the bullet and give the game a completely finite ending after beating hades. if players want to go back and play more to complete other npc questlines, they pick up play from before they beat hades. this isnt explained "narratively" bc the plot is already concluded and now theyre just playing for fun (eg. what going under does)

I also think for a character-focused story-rich game, roguelite was a really terrible choice of genre as it locks every interaction behind pure chance and hours of grinding - just really baffling why they decided to do this, especially when theyve had such success previously making games within different genres (transistor, bastion, pyre). the core of the issue for me is that the devs wanted to create a game that was both story rich AND a rogue - and these things arent mutually exclusive, but the best features of each contradict each other when you try to balance them in a way to appease their respective fans (ie. the challenge/complexity of the gameplay is heavily restricted by keeping it easy for ppl unfamiliar with rogues to pick up, but the strength of the narrative arc is simultaneously weakened by the fact that as a rogue it has to be perpetual bc of permadeath + you're working with procedural generation…)

I'm not going to beef with the artstyle or music bc I rly loved them both (even if I wish the body diversity was better!), or with the interpretations of greek gods bc literally every piece of media abt greek mythos has to decide how to interpret them and I think its silly to be like "this isnt CANON" - since we actually dont HAVE a strict "canon" for many of these stories bc theyve been retold/translated in so many conflicting ways lol. I've just heard ppl complaining abt that and I dont think its worth complaining about 🤷‍♀️

ANYWAY tl;dr: hades should've been an action-heavy isometric metroidvania… it wouldve made it far easier to focus on character questlines (ie. with respawn points + a fixed map), unified the story they wanted to tell with the gameplay SO much more effectively, and allowed them to reach the full potential of both, whilst also playing up to supergiant's previous game-making strengths. but thats my 2 cents!

[ashmp3]

It's award season (unconfirmed)! Give some of your mutuals silly little awards.

awww okay sorry for answering late i wanted to sit down and Write It Down. Also sorry to everyone i didnt talk about i love you all for real and i appreciate you being part of ashmp3 nation. Now lets start!

@bewby best cousin award. Seven truly is like my little sister at this point like thats a sibling we just get eachother we followed eachother for such a long time like we went through our teenage years together in a way. love you my bunny girl!!!!! @kurapikasjudgementchain award for putting up with me and being my friend *curtsy*.

@sunuism mutual with the coolest fashion sense for SURE if u havent already u all need to be seated for Ri's fit checks.... @wantbytaemin i would say another cousin award bc sometimes it truly feel like we are so similar on so many levels it just makes me giggle like our grandmothers having the same names thats just insane to me. One of the longest mutuals award and Also best shawol award of course but thats given... @bourgeoix my smart girl mutual you know that post "i have ppl with phd on my dash" yes thats mel to me. when i see your posts talking about either your work or anything really im like THERE SHE ISS i love to see it truly adore it. Also dyke award *everyone cheers*

@seahavaen mutual with hottest sexiest seductive vibes period.

@diamondcrystals best exol award shared with @whitechocolate How are we feeling friends its getting real......

@10281 favorite mutual i made on this blog! hands down. i am grateful svt exists and made us cross paths

@smirnoffgrl my loveliest kaya award for being hottest sweetheart on the whole world and also someone i would love to party with the most out of everyone.. partygirl award

@polaroidlovemp3 friendliest mutual award!!! you are so sweet and cute and i love how we just send eachother posts and tag eachother out of the blue thats literally crucial part of blogging and you get it so well...

@shalalayong BEST TYONGF AWARD! no brainer of course... but i also love when u posts snippets from ur life its so cute Mwah @jeonwonwoo Best insane gifmaker (positive ofc) Zaynab you just get me and thats not an easy thing to do. Congratulations or sorry thats true.... @ayatou Best sweet normal gifmaker (also positive) Ngoc you and Zaynab come together in my mind same coin different sides etc. You are so sweet and friendly and i just love seeing your posts on my dash its an instant re-reblog ...

@mistarover and @jaebeomtual very recent mutuals that both made me feel like we have known eachother for a long time which is always such a nice feeling tbh you both are friendly and talkative and i love that

@pocji mutual with best music taste but also hag mutual (affectionately) we just get eachother I am truly so happy you are still on tumblr... I actually remember following you on my old blog in 2016 and we became mutuals years later and i was GEEKED

@egos and @kitschundschund and for the end my sisters cousins friends from high school etc the shiet we all went through together its just something IRL friends havent gone through LMFAO my favorite girls award !!!!!

[lindszeppelin]

I used to live in LA and I back up your friend saying paparazzi aren’t waiting for people, even in Malibu. I’ve literally never seen paparazzi but I’ve seen famous people. Like, REALLY famous people- who have been famous for decades and even in one instance was in the middle of a HUGE legal scandal. No paparazzi (and the legal scandal one was in 2019 so still very recent therefore regarding the same climate as how this stuff works now).

I don’t want to dislike Kaia (it doesn’t really feel good to dislike people, or at least it isn’t productive) but the more I realized the UK Daily Mail has been covering her or at least her family from birth, the more I realized she really isn’t anything special and just had PR this whole time. So many people still don’t know who or what a Kaia Gerber even is because not everyone loves fashion, we don’t live in a monoculture anymore where everyone is consuming the same content, and she’s hasn’t even done a lot in Hollywood besides being an obvious nepo baby by being so bad at acting and yet…she gets “caught” by the paps getting her damn green drinks and going to the gym? Make it make sense. That’s totally orchestrated. I can’t trust anything out of Kaia Gerber’s mouth once I put that all together. I know a lot of stars do this, but most actually have talent and we all know that she lol…doesn’t exactly have talent!

It’s all also a play from the Kris Jenner bible ( her and Cindy are friends…) by creating publicity and forcing relevance. Nothing is real or organic ( not even her social media…8 or 9 million last time I checked and yet most ppl I know in real life have never heard of her… #ThingsThatMakeYouGoHmmmm). Side note: has anyone ever investigated her social media stats on social blade (blaze?) or does nobody care enough about her to look into it?

When people wonder why Austin and Kaia are hiding…it’s because they can easily hide. Maybe Deux Moi spotting or fans on cell phones sometimes, but again, we’re not in a monoculture so not everyone knows who they are enough to care if they saw them (and I say this as an Austin fan who’s glad he’s getting his flowers; however he only recently made it in a major mainstream way and not everyone saw Elvis/are now learning more about him via MOTA and Dune. All due respect to him but he’s still being cemented into culture in real time and isn’t say, Matt Damon yet…but hey probably one day!). Also regarding both LA and New York, as your friend said, celebrities are around so we largely don’t care and do not take pics when we see them. It’s soooo easy to hide as a celebrity. It’s ridiculous when people act like the paps invade a celebrity’s privacy or that Austin (or anyone else for that matter) must be “hiding” and can’t be living a normal life. HA.

Final thought: even though I said Austin is just getting warmed up, let’s be real and admit he’s more respected than Kaia and likely more liked/known regarding household name recognition. And yet KAIA is papped more than her bf who was nominated for an Oscar?!? And people think that’s just an organic occurrence? 😂😂😂😂😂😂 People need to do some critical thinking and realize what’s happening here!

holy shit i love coming back home from dinner and seeing this beauty in my inbox

you said everything so flawlessly that we have been thinking and saying for a long time, and it's great that you put it in these terms. nothing is ever real or organic about kaia, and kaia with austin together. there are a lot of people her age with talent that i can respect, but she has zero talent and only gets what she does through her parents and by dating austin. it's simple as that. her dating austin was just another PR maneuver to keep her relevant.

[cool-person-yey]

Hey folks, so I was a bit bored and thought I'd be cool to take some notes of my thoughts while I was watching the first episode of tmagp

Most of them are nonsense but that's the way I think so

obviously, there will be spoilers for the new tmagp episode ( I'm tagging it tmagp spoilers ofc) so I'd you didn't watch it, go watch it now cmon man

welp, here they are

TMAGP SHOW NOTES!!!11!;1

• Oh dang 44 minutes ???

• ohhhh ominous music :)))

• HI ALEX

• HOLY SHITTT

• RUSTY QUILL PRESENTS THE MAGNUS PROTOCOL LETS FUCKIN GO

•* printer not functioning noises*

• not even 5 minutes in and I'm already recognizing some voices

• Alice <<<333

•BONES ARE A BIG LIE MADE BY MILK TO KEEP YOU BUYING IT that's what I've saying

• I also function on coffee and spite. and social media drama. as a treat.

• sorry mate you deserve to be booed

• " or they finally kill me " oh boy

• ooooohhhh Gwen!!!!

• " I'm your cool sister, Gwen's your uncool sister, Lena's the emotionally distant mother, Teddy is the uncle that just got another job and Collin's the grumpy IT manager" just. this. idk. just

•Alice is funny and I'll die on this hill thank you

• not the nepotism

• the spooky tape recorders already started or is teddy just forgetful??? hmmmm

• mold you like clay

• Alice is my favorite character actually

• Windows 95? oh wait no

• "what does it do?" "crashes mostly"

• " is that legal?" " probably. We do work for the government. sorta"

• finally a filing system that's a least a bit understandable(???)

• " The coolest person *left* in London" the hell you did to the rest of them Alice? 🤨

•wait what

• smashing it with a hammer would fix a lot of problems. supernatural or not.

• Collin is a mood

•Norris, Chester and Augustus huh

• WAIT WHAT

• NEVER HEARING WHO

• WHAT

• CEMETERY???

• THE HELL

• ARTHUR!!!!

• took him away from you??? this is concerning

• oh no,,,,,

• Darla?

• it spoke! using another person's voice— oh no

• discolored skin? mismatched features? oh no

• " some of him:)))" oh no

• shit

• being afraid of someone ( or some parts) of someone you loved. we're starting well

• Yeah there are worse ones buddy

• oh cmon it ain't that bad just put the goddamn word in there

• "you traitor" love me a dramatic queen///

• OHHH SHE'S GOING INTO THE DIRECTOR'S OFFICE ( the equivalent of it in a office job I suppose)

• ohh performance review okay

• look kids, sometimes you gotta deliver a work that's just okay instead of ABSOLUTELY perfect.

• so Gwen's the overachiever, got it.

• she's saying that as if Alice hasn't been shitting on everyone there already lmao

• oh we wish it was that easy

• oh the deja vu

• " what do you actually want" " your job" damn she's bolder than I thought lmao

• I wish I could talk back to people like that

• damn Collin's pissed

• Alice being a menace we love to see it

• " I'm a vegetarian" deadpan

• top 10 awkward conversations

• Collin is the most relatable of them all

• " a bit bleak" is an understatement

• clack clack clack

• you really need to know bro's backstory on his first day?

• is there a bet going on on who has the worst awful backstory to explain being there. that'd be funny I think

• buddy that's the worst place to try getting back to your feet but ok

• MAGNUS INSTITUTE RUINS LETS GO

•" what's the deal with the Magnus Institute" well. see. there's a lot of deals.

• alright? just a semi-normal conversation as of now

• nope

• yea the institute does that to ya

• " a cool vibe " yeah buddy

• "offices like little cells" oh you'd be surprised

• ARCHIVE HE SAID ARCHIVE!!!!!

• oh no the symbols

• strange stains mmnn

• an,,,,, empty box?

• photographic distortion. oh boy. oh boy.

• yea guys don't steal stuff from spooky sightseeing places especially if they could be yknow. cursed.

• are we going to be listening to ppl fighting on the internet rn or

• IMAGE REMOVED??? STAY ABOVE GROUND??? OH NO

• EYES????

• GORE???? OH BOY,,,,

• and the thread was locked. well damn.

• a blast from the past huh

• " is a bad name" " so is Gwendolyn"

• hmm static

• phone

• "you get a job and I got a victim"

• that seems like a reasonable theory tbh

• cleaning toilets actually helps people

• Sam noodle arms confirmed

• " to new beginnings" " with old friends" * clank*

• oh great more little noises

• more noises

• OHHH

• find who???? WHO????

• oh you got to be kidding me

• more ominous music hmmmm

• The Magnus Protocol is a podcast FUCK YEAH IT SURE IS!

Phew, that was a lot. thank you if you read all of this lmao

edit: fixed some misspellings, if there any left please do warn me! my heading's not the best and auto-correct is a bitch (especially if you use two languages lmao)

[bookofmirth]

Lele, I have a rambling though

We always have discussions about possibilities for SJM future books (especially acotar 5) and I always read interpretations that are done so very tastefully and with a lot of knowledge on text interpretation, book context and narratives

but the thing is… ppl always treat SJM as this super hiper mastermind and after HOFAS and how messy and not good it was (honestly it was terrible) … I’m a little afraid about acotar 5 and sjm choosing to go with the easiest way (which, for me, would be choosing Elriel - since with Gwyn she would have to treat her trauma her carefully and be more cautions on her narrative) and I don’t know if I see her doing it 😓

(Also… I would like to say as my last though of someone who is following her since 2018 - that SJM loves to write about powerful woman and the friendships between them and their bonds but to let the fandom be where it is today… young impressionable girls treating each other with such hostility and disrespect… I know she probably can’t say anything bc of contracts but man is a hard pillow to swallow that she “let” the fandom be where it is today… which is a horrible place.)

Anon, have some rambling thoughts of mine!!! hehehe

A big difference between acotar and hofas is how thoughtfully she generally treats the acotar characters. I've been thinking a lot about this the past few days and the main thing I dislike about hofas is how the plot and world building absolutely take over everything to the detriment of the characters. I cannot understate how much I dislike Bryce, and I've always pinpointed her lack of consistent values as the core reason why. hofas really, really emphasized that writing flaw. Not character flaw, but writing flaw.

People acting like sjm is some mastermind drives me crazy when we can see all the plot holes and inconsistencies and retcons. One of these days, someone should make a list of them. Anyway, she mentioned rereading the acotar series sometime last year, and I would bet you good money that she did so in order to see what she can use. She has said explicitly that she isn't great at world building and she has also said that she didn't plan the crossover until she was writing hosab. That means any connection we see between hofas and, for instance, acomaf, is a result of her going backwards to see what she can use. Not the other way around. She "planned" in the sense that she wrote really vague stuff in the first place so that she could use it how she wanted to later on. That has become really apparent to me with the crossover.

Like... for example, Mor's power is "truth". Vague as fuck, right? I would bet good money (again haha like I'm rich) that sjm didn't even know what that meant in acomaf other than "I need a reason for the mortal queens to trust Mor". And then she'll figure out the mechanics and technicalities later and the fandom will call her brilliant for it. *facepalm*

I don't see e*riel being easy at all. But that's all I will say about that hehe.

Gwyn's story aligns perfectly with what sjm has already been doing in acotar, with Rhys and Lucien, and to an extent Nesta. I don't have any concerns there because I think her strength is in her characterization. (CC is just... another beast.) There was an interview she did a while back where she talked about the movie Promising Young Woman and it really emphasized to me that sjm's particular brand of feminism revolves around gender and sex. This isn't a critique, just a statement of what I've observed. My point is that she is very aware of rape culture and has strong feelings about it and gives characters the space to heal on page, and so that's not really a concern of mine, especially in acotar.

To your final point, I got SO frustrated the other day in the group chat, @sabrinasam said it was the most frustrated she's ever seen me haha. I'm so tired of sjm and the publisher being coy about this!!!! But mostly, I am so, so sick of people in this fandom treating each other like shit just because they don't agree on ships. Like it's one thing to have notps and brotps and to be annoyed by or even hate certain characters. It's a completely different thing when people feel totally comfortable going out in public and treating other actual, real, human people like absolute garbage because of those feelings.

Azriel is never gonna lick your fucking home entertainment center!!! Get the fuck over it!!!!!!!!!

I don't think that sjm is at fault for this because I think that people are responsible for their own actions. I also fully believe that the people taking screenshots and mocking them publicly (of people who probably have them blocked anyway, fucking stalkers) or just outright attacking people on different platforms would be doing that exact same thing whether it was about sjm or not. Like you could just stick them in another fandom, and these people would act the same deplorable way.

Anyway. I'm fucking tired. I'm still excited for acotar5 and will continue that series and when I was doing a lil voice chat with my friends for hours last weekend it revived my enjoyment of acotar and ToG. The fandom just makes it a lot of work, trying to have fun.

[stargirlfeyre]

“Azriel may be boring as shit but at least he never went after someone who was actively treating Feyre like shit. At least the Archeron he’s going after is actually working to fix her relationship with Feyre. Cassian went for someone who was still treating his friend like dog shit and I just can’t respect that.” ALL OF THIS

i’m always hesitant to say this bc some ppl are super sensitive when it comes to cassian for some funny reason (all the other boys are able to be criticized but not him bc he can be funny?) but part of why i don’t like him as much as azriel is because of how he went for nesta too early on, it was super premature for him to come onto her so blatantly in front of everyone even when she was mortal and he’d literally just met her, knowing how feyre was treated etc…i adore cassian when i don’t look at his character too closely. as much as i prefer feyssian over feyzriel because of her and cassian having more sweet bestie moments than her and az do, whenever there’s a discussion i’ll always choose az first because of cassian and nesta. like anon said i can’t help but put myself in feyre’s shoes when i’m reading but i don’t like that he came onto nesta the way he did and how soon he did, and he had no shame about it in front of feyre and the rest.

i know some people are super chill or they have sisters or family members that cross these lines all the time, like your friend flirting with your sister, but in my family or friend groups we don’t do that especially if a sister is really mean to me, why would i approve of my friend going for her so blatantly in front of me? it’s not so much a harsh or possessive petty thing but just basic morale? cassian imo doesn’t get enough flack for how he came onto nesta so soon. it’s true too that at least az didn’t show any signs of having a crush until acowar and acofas, i prefer someone humbly and respectfully handling a crush on my sister than how in your face cassian was about it with nesta in only book two. idk sometimes it feels like his dick thinks for him and even acosf proved that.

i prefer acowar cassian! but i also skip the pages whenever he’s acting out over nesta or they’re both being angst ridden for one another, i just can’t take it seriously bc he was obv thinking with his dick or mating bond and she was still treating everyone like they were less than her despite her being a pos who has never done anything.

idk 😮‍💨 like i said it’s so easy to love cass as a character when you don’t look at his dynamic with nesta from feyre’s shoes in book two. i imagine mainly feyre stan’s struggle with him due to his attachment to nesta so early on. that bonus chapter anon mentioned where cassian put his body up against nesta’s asking whether she was a virgin or not? he’d only recently met her and was doing that, it being too soon aside, it was very inappropriate to do. even mor made it clear that he acts that way with women when they don’t want him and see’s it as “a challenge” just 10 reasons why az and rhysand will always come off as the most mature to me.

the other reasons i don’t favor him have to do with sjm having him refer to nesta as a queen in acosf, him always showing doubt with the ic’s decisions in acosf as if he’s not apart of the ic (why did he seem so against them in acosf at times? most of the time they were right too so it was just weird for sjm to do) saying nesta didn’t need to apologize to anyone supposedly (really sjm? 💀) having sex with nesta on a hike where she was supposed to own up to her wrongs and mature after she just told feyre she could die (inappropriate timing much..?) acting funny when rhysand felt the need to tell her to be nice to gwyn and emerie when he knows damn well rhysand isn’t at the house of wind like them to know nesta’s behavior had gotten better. how the hell would rhysand know that nesta’s not being mean to him when rhysand’s only ever seen her be rude af to everyone..? and then made it even worse when he petulantly wrapped his arm around nesta to make rhysand feel uncomfortable.

•

[narrativelysignificantturtleduck]

not the same anon but i also hc sokka as autistic (specifically audhd), bc there was always certain ways he behaved that i found i related to a lot. a lot of them are just reasons you mentioned: he can be very blunt, and one thing about sokka is that he is a tendency to put his foot in his mouth sometimes, just saying things as they are without realising it might be insensitive or that it might not be the best thing to say. and i know that him overlooking certain important details, such as toph being blind at times, can be attributed to adhd but i think that forgetfulness in regards to other people is something that can be attributed to autism, in that he doesn't really think about the fact she's blind despite obviously knowing. on the contrast though, whilst at times he seems unaware, i think sokka can be very hyperaware of very small things that hes insecure of that other people don't really notice, or that other people have pointed out that he might not have thought much about before which is also smt ik some ppl with autism struggle with. and even though he is a social person, like i mentioned before that at times he seems slightly unaware of certain things, but a lot of his social behaviours can be read as masking, like his insistence he is the "meat, sarcasm and planning" guy, trying to pin his personality on these key things, and whilst his attempts to be like hakoda are Daddy Issues it can also be read as the fact he knows his dad is a well respected, well liked man, and that by mimicking his behaviour he will be perceived as more socially acceptable.

the most obvious thing is the scheduling, we know he loves his plans and he's the self proclaimed "plan guy" but he gets quite grumpy when people don't abide by them and happy when people do. sokka is a very routine person, when we first see the swt he gets frustrated when the kids don't want to train, another thing that could be read as them throwing off his schedule. there's also the thing with the fortune teller- sokka is very insistent on his science, something he's very passionate about, and gets really easily frustrated when people won't listen to him when he's trying to explain something, and can't understand why people would believe that instead of what he believes, which also kind of leans into the whole social unawareness thing. nowadays i write him more as having audhd just because i think it fits more- a lot of autism traits and adhd do overlap, and it's very common for ppl with autism to have a lot of adhd traits, vice versa. that's all i can personally think of tho, but yeah all nd hcs are neat. need more in the world

you're so right actually. i've been fully convinced. i think because i'm audhd it's hard to separate out whether it's the adhd or autism that makes me relate to a character. it could be both! also i think that the way sokka is widely perceived as dumb and silly when he's actually very intelligent is very similar to adhd stereotypes and less similar to autism stereotypes, so it was easy for me to just kinda pick that one.

his insistence he is the "meat, sarcasm and planning" guy, trying to pin his personality on these key things

i have a whole post in my drafts about how his various different "[x] guy" titles throughout the show are evidence of adhd because you feel like you can't focus on one thing and you feel like a fuck-up (bc you may forget things/be disorganized) and you're desperately trying to find the one thing that will make up for you being an unfocused fuck-up. but it actually makes so much sense as autism too, as a social script that makes it easier to define himself to other people. also defining yourself by your interests and only wanting to interact with people through them is very autistic. i think it's a question on the raads-r. also it's why i'm on tumblr.

anyways, the fun thing is that both can be true simultaneously. it's a product of insecurities about adhd and also an autistic social script.

and whilst his attempts to be like hakoda are Daddy Issues it can also be read as the fact he knows his dad is a well respected, well liked man, and that by mimicking his behaviour he will be perceived as more socially acceptable.

i think this might've also been why i initially read him as only adhd. i fell for his mask! what we know of hakoda reads as only adhd, so i made the mistake of assuming that was it. and i'm a huge proponent of "hakoda and sokka are actually different people"! shame on me.

like, generally the way he's trying to play this warrior role that doesn't fit him because he thinks that's what he's supposed to be can be read as autistic masking. he imitates how he thinks strong men are and it comes off as comical and fake bc attempting to mask sometimes means the fact that it's a mask is really obvious.

yeah i'm into this. audhd sokka!!!!!

[convenientalias]

2023 Dramas I Watched in 2023

Cdramas:

A League of Nobleman--Slashy historical mystery drama. I loved all the slashiness and all the intrigue and then in the last few episodes I fell even more in love with the villain. Worth a watch but not my favorite slashy historical mystery of the year.

Mysterious Lotus Casebook--My favorite slashy historical mystery drama of the year! Tho more wuxia than historical I suppose. Bromance and archnemeses and identity porn abound. The identity porn in particular was a special treat for me; a character wandering around all these ppl who care deeply about him or idolize him but all think he's dead is my catnip. (I technically have a few episodes left to go on this one but I'm still counting it bc I am very close.)

Parallel World--YE LIUXI. I did a review of this one here! The short version: urban fantasy and parallel worlds in a desert setting, with a badass amnesiac female protagonist.

The Lady and the Lies--Miniseries, one of those short-episode things that China's doing a lot of now. Involved a cheating husband and a wife out to get revenge. I'm sorry but I shipped the wife with almost every person doing her wrong. She should destroy their lives and also dom them. They're all kind of obsessed with her anyway, in their own way.

Under the Microscope--You ever sit down and say, "Okay, but what I REALLY want from all these historical dramas is to just dig into the tax fraud going on in the background"? Me too, my friend. This show and Long River, which I also watched this year, are all about logistics, bureaucracy, and corruption, and the small man's struggle against ppl in power. That makes them both kind of difficult watches in a way, but also fascinating. I have yet to finish Long River, but this one is an easy 14 episodes and not as emotionally draining, so it was much easier for me to binge through.

Ye Cheng--I must admit I watched this for the pretty people. It's set in a matriarchal fantasy wuxia setting, but the gender role reversal feels a little shallow when the strongest good guy and the strongest bad guy are both men, even tho in theory women are supposed to be the warriors in this setting. However, the role reversal can be quite interesting in some ways--watching the male MC run a brothel as the city's top entertainer, try to use his ~masculine wiles~ to charm the FMC in a way that would be more typically feminine, and deal with the power dynamics of joining the FMC's household. Also, the two leads are just a lot of fun and have a lot of chemistry. The plot is sometimes stupid, but it's still a lot of fun to watch. Also, this was one of just two dramas I managed to finish this year that were mostly romance focused. When you reach the "dropped" section you will see that this is an impressive feat.

Kdramas:

Bloodhounds--I love Woo Do-hwan and I love Park Sung-woong but you know I was here for the ACTION SCENES. PEOPLE PUNCHING EACH OTHER AND SLICING EACH OTHER WITH KNIVES. THATS WHAT ITS ABOUT. I've also written a lot of fanfic about the protagonist and villain at this point but honestly they should have interacted more, we were robbed.

Queen of Masks--The only rich woman thriller kdrama I completed this year. But honestly, when it comes to rich woman thriller kdramas, I've seen better and femslashier. Mine did a better job with the whole "your husband told you the mother of his child was dead, but guess what it's actually me and I'm still alive and here to cause problems" plotline, tho I still enjoyed it here. And the sexual assault aspect... eh. I don't love seeing that kind of plotline in a revenge story; it's such a serious issue (and so much more realistic than, say, "this businessman murdered my whole family to acquire our company" a la Eve) that it kind of makes it hard for me to enjoy the fun of the mystery. But I suppose the way they handled it at least had gravity. My favorite plotline was Hae-mi and her husband and the drama they got into, which is serious in its own way (addiction and lies) but extremely well acted and with so much romantic chemistry.

Revenant--Spooky spooky ghosts and Kim Tae-ri, what's not to like? The possession aspects were creepy without being gory or too terrifying for a wimp like me to handle. The acting was great. And I actually shipped the sort-of-romantic subplot, though apparently a lot of ppl shipped the two MCs instead, which is understandable.

Song of the Bandits--A whole ton of gunfighting and other action scenes. One very badass assassin woman, a dude who is equally capable of taking out a whole squad of soldiers or bandits on his own, a villain with a complicated relationship with the dude above, and a woman spying on the Japanese government who's in a sort of spy love triangle with the MC and the villain. the plot was okay but again I was mostly here for the action!!

Thai dramas:

My Dear Gangster Oppa--This year I tried to watch a bunch of different BL dramas bc I was in that kind of mood but the truth is, it's not the het that gets me in m/f romcoms, it's unfortunately the romcom. Despite that! I persisted and did manage to finish this one. The lead couple was cute, and there was gangster intrigue and action etc to keep the fluff and comedy from driving me insane. still mostly a romance.

To Sir With Love--Also has a BL romance in it but not really a romance drama but a Family Drama with lots of familial plotting, the classic first wife vs. second wife scheming-for-their-children plotline along with what could have been a love triangle between brothers... except Tian is gay, which means the love triangle is null (except he's still engaged to his brother's love interest. which is awkward for all involved.). Also Tian being gay is a Deep Dark Secret. There's a lot of homophobia which might turn some viewers off but I loved seeing Tian's struggle between wanting to come out and having been forced to stay in the closet for so long that he freezes even at the thought of telling people he trusts. Also his mother commits a bunch of murders with terrible poison mushrooms so if THAT'S what you want out of a Thai drama, there is also that. Also he and his brother are. so sweet. and I love them. but also the central m/m romance is very good and involves assassination attempts and identity porn and pining and everything good. Also also this is actually a 2022 drama BUT IM STILL COUNTING IT bc it came out in October 2022 and am I really supposed to get around to watching dramas that fast??

Started and dropped:

Kiseki: Dear to Me--Even gangsters and intrigue could not save me from dropping this romcom.

Our Blooming Youth--This is also a romcom. You may see a pattern here. But to give it credit it is quite a plotty historical drama too. I just didn't really care about the two leads and dropped it halfway through.

Pandora: Beneath the Paradise--A thriller that was going places a bit too wild and frustrating for me.

Killing Vote--Can you believe I dropped this with only four episodes to go? I'm sorry Park Sung-woong, I love you but the plot is just so boring. And it plays at moral complexity while being just. not very complex. Like I swear the morality in this thing is "catching bad guys and punishing them is good, not catching them and not punishing them is bad." We could be talking about police corruption, our MC's terrible ethics, innocence until proven guilty, and so on and so forth, but we were just not going there. Also the twists were doing very little for me and the cops are just not very interesting characters. Again, Park Sung-woong, I'm sorry, you were a decent character but you could not save this show. Let's be real I needed either more Devil Judge here or more Death Note.

Legend of Anle--The romcom element was not helping this show's case but I still tried for 1) wuxia with identity porn and 2) Dilraba Dilmurat costarring with Gong Jun. Unfortunately those two had no chemistry and the plot was just very unsatisfying for me in the political intrigue area. One example: Gong Jun can't find the supplies needed to pacify a near-rioting mob. But that's okay bc Anle's subordinates found it. How did they find the super secret hidden storehouse?? we don't know and will never find out bc it was offscreen and never explained. They just did. this would be fine if it weren't, like, the climax of the episode and presented as a victory of the two MC's brilliance. I can't deal with this.

Naughty Babe--It's. A romcom. I'm so sorry I probably should just stop trying.

Other romcoms I quit too fast to give a fair opinion: You Are Mine, Extremely Perilous Love, My Lethal Man, Taikan Yoho.

Well, there you have it, 2023 dramas I watched in 2023.

Fun as it was, I think in 2024 I'm going to try to catch up more with older dramas lols.

Did y'all watch any of these dramas this year?

[kentopedia]

rylie ur so real for the rant u posted bc i feel the same way sometimes . . . i started writin smut ONE TIME bc i wanted to try it out and ever since then i sorta just kept doing it bc i dont like when my activity goes 📈📉📉📉 and like ok i dont rly mind writin smut but i wish some of the other stuff that i write would do as well cause i never rly intended for my blog to become a nsfw blog but uhhhh here we are 🧍 and if im being fr i kinda feel the same way about gojo too. this isnt really the point but i like gojo n all but honestly i only still write a lot of jjk bc that gets way more popular than my bsd stuff so i feel more motivated to write for jjk and less so for bsd even tho i enjoy writin for dazai n chuuya more 😖😖 oh well. anyways thats my own rant, u dont have to post/answer this but im cool either way lmao !

honestly halfway thru typing that i forgot what my point was but uhhh yea hopefully u know what i mean </3

HANNAH NO i know exactly what you mean 😭 i wrote that one nanami piece bc (well obviously i wanted to) but also bc i knew it would get notes :/ and i actually really like it don’t get me wrong i had fun writing it!! but now everyone’s talking about ppl writing that stuff for him and it makes me feel weird being lumped in with that group of ppl. but my nanami stuff never does as well as my other work and idek why bc i’ve been a nanami blog since day 1, my first work was for nanami and i have literally never changed my url ?? & i DO love writing for dazai so so much but i also love writing for nanami so so much. so it’s kind of a bummer when of all the characters i’ve written nanami pieces get the least notes. especially bc ik the jjk fans are alive and well.

sigh. not to start any discourse but i like writing other stuff more than nsfw too ! but now that i’ve gotten so many followers i feel like … i have to keep doing it. and i like to try new things but i don’t want to mostly be a nsfw blog either. i have fun writing it but i get tired of it quickly, that’s why most of my nsfw pieces are so long. & it’s so easy for people to say “write what you love” but it’s discouraging when i write 10k words of mostly sfw & get 400 notes & other people can write 400 words of nsfw and get 10k notes.

[mikomikono]

hi miko! im here with a fic writing question… i was thinking about how to make smut good bc recently i feel like whenever i get to the smut part of the fic im writing i get super bored, like im just rehashing whatever ive been writing in every smut scene ive done for years. you and endles came to mind bc i always find your guys nsfw scenes really compelling, and great, and unique. while also being hot and fun (very important w smut!!) so i wanted to ask if you had any tips for keeping things exciting or fresh when you are tackling those scenes! especially because you guys have experience writing the same characters many times over and manage to be so creative and distinct with every scene ive read from you. so, i guess, penny for your thoughts, if you feel like it! (sorry for sending this only to you and asking for both your opinions, it was the simplest 😭. if u want to answer yourself only thats fine haha)

❤️

Heyyyy oh my god I never expected to become someone ppl would come to for writing advice, what an honour 💖 also, I hope you don't mind me answering publicly, bc I feel like this is something a lit of writers struggle with! I will put it under a cut tho, bc I ended up writing quite a bit oops

So. Smut. It's kinda funny you should ask me about that, bc the first proper sex scene I ever wrote was last year for Steamship Sexcapades (bc I am not counting that one feeble attempt at 19 that was so cringe that I hid it away and didn't even think about trying again for like 8 yrs) but I suppose after writing *checks The Canon word count* a lot since then means something :DD

Here's the thing: I also feel like I'm rehashing things. Constantly. There's only so many ways you can say "cock in hole ➡️ thrust" before you're gonna have to repeat some phrases. And honestly, I feel like I repeat phrases remarkably often! But in a way that's all writing! (or that's how I stop myself from getting too depressed about it lol) The readers don't notice! Usually. And as long as you don't use the exact same wording every single time.

Ok, so here's a few tips on what I, personally, think you need to make a good sex scene:

Don't be afraid of the words. Y'know, the first time I wrote "half-hard cock" I (allegedly) had to take a 10min break and texted a friend that I was not going to be able to do this. But after a while you sort of get used to it and the words that seemed embarrassing stop being that, and become just... Words. And you also shouldn't shy away from more "cringe" words! Sometimes its fun to be a little cringe!

Related, you should try to love the words. But that's just good general writing advice, I feel.

Describe the emotions. Most people feel... something towards those they are intimate with, and that should be true in erotica too. It should be especially true in erotica, I think! Even if it's a one night stand, strangers who met in the club 5mins ago, whatever... You want the characters to feel.

Don't forget the physical. This is a thing that might seem a bit... weird. Like, you're writing sex, how could it not be physical? But what I mean is that you shouldn't forget to describe how it feels to the people involved, most notably your POV character. It's very easy to get lost in describing what they're doing and completely forget to get into the actual feeling. You're not writing a sex manual! And I have read fics where half way through I realise that's what it sounds like.

It's never just about the sex. Even if you think it is, it's not. It's about the connection, the narrative, the characterisation... It's about showing something that you can only show through the kind of vulnerable intimacy that sex scenes provide. Even if it's a oneshot pwp, it still has something to say. Maybe that something is wanting to get your rocks off, but also we're talking about fanfiction... We don't read and write that just to get off. It's always about the characters.

Rehashing is fine, actually. As I said, there's only so many ways to describe certain things, and so many ways you can have sex. Except that's not really true, because the secret to keeping it fresh is mixing it up! You can change positions, you can change who's the top/bottom, you can add foreplay (you should) and then change what kind of foreplay you wanna have! You can look into kinks! You can change locations! (I know we've done that a lot) You can add or remove any number of things to make each individual encounter different! And that's the key: repetition is fine, so long as you don't use the exact same everything every time. Case in point, there is a tumblr post which I would link except I'm on mobile, that is titled sth like "list of vocal sounds for smut", which has a list of, well, sounds/verbs (moan, groan, hiss, whimper, whisper etc) and adjectives that could be paired with them (hoarse, needy, quiet, throaty, desperate, wanton etc). The point is, that the best way to keep from sounding repetitive is to mix and match the words so that even if you say "groan" five times in 5k words, it's a different kind of groan every time. The same applies to sex acts! Do you have any idea how much cock Ryunosuke has sucked during The Canon? A lot. But it doesn't feel repetitive (hopefully) because everything else around it is switched up.

And perhaps most importantly: you gotta be at least a little horny for it yourself. I get it, man, writing smut is weird. You sit in front of your computer, staring at the monitor like "hmm is it better to use the word cock or dick or member?" And like... That's not very sexy. But! But!!! At the end of the day you gotta write something that makes you excited! Otherwise what's the point? Why are you writing if it doesn't fulfill you on some level??

Anyway, that's just my thoughts on the matter. If you want more specific help with writing, you can always DM me, I don't mind~

Also, endles says she is too mentally exhausted to properly answer, but she seconds everything I said, especially the point about loving the words. Actually she really wants to say sth about that, so I'm paraphrasing her for the rest of this:

You, as a writer, should love language. You should love the neat little things that language can do and seek out new things to try every time. It's a journey of discovery! Just like sex is always a new journey, even if it's the same characters and the same sex acts, every individual time is a chance to find something new. Let yourself have fun! Write something really stupid and work from that. The way I create scenes by writing jokes, even for serious scenes, because sex at the core is kinda funny. You're standing naked (at least partially) in front of this other naked person and it makes you feel a bit funny.

Also concrete advice: pick a list of 5-10 words you want to use. They can be anything, verbs, nouns, adjectives, as long as you really, really vibe with them, because they make you happy, as long as they're not words you already use a lot. They can also all relate to the same theme if you want! And then find a way to put all those words in.

[beanie-twink]

So since you wanted some ianthony song recs... And I am also currently working on creating a playlist for them. I figured you wouldn't mind if I ramble about some of my favourite choices so far! :D

For now the playlist is still pretty TS heavy , since I went through her albums first to look for songs. So here are some of my top choices (aside from midnight rain) for them there:

- forever winter

"he spends most of his nights wishing it was how it used to be" "all this time I didn't know you were breaking down. I'd fall to pieces on the floor, if you weren't around"

- 'tis the damn season

"if I wanted to know who you were hanging with while I was gone I would have asked you" "so we could call it even [...] I'm staying at my parent's house and the road not taken looks real good now" "and I always leads to you, in my hometown" "so I'll go back to LA [...] And wonder about the only soul who can tell which smiles I'm fakin'"

- and then of course the corresponding "Dorothea"

- closure (this song hits even more since we know about the letter that Anthony wrote)

(tho I'm glad that the song doesn't actually apply to them irl anymore; it just feels like Smth for the in between phase)

- both happiness and evermore also fit pretty well for that time

Especially with "sorry, I can't see facts through all of my fury. You haven't met the new me yet" "now I get fake niceties. No one teaches you what to do when a good man hurts you and you know you hurt him too"

And

"motion capture put me in a bad light" "writing letters addressed to the fire" "I rewind the tape but all it does is pause on the very moment all was lost"

- also "right where you left me" for Ian Vs "it's time to go" for anthony

- I almost do

Literally the whole song fits so well here idk what else to say (works from both perspectives imo)

- Breathe

"Cause none of us thought that it was gonna end this way. Ppl are ppl and sometimes we change our minds. But it's killing me to see you go after all this time" "you're the only thing I know like the back of my hand" "It's 2:00 am feeling like I just lost a friend. Hope you know it's not easy for me"

- That's when

Just really reminds me of that time when they were still apart and when asked if there are any plans of Anthony coming back one day or Smth like that and said Smth along the lines of "the door is always open"

- the story of us

Again, literally the whole song istg

But especially "now I'm standing alone in a crowded room and we're not speaking. And I'm dying to know: is it killing you like it's killing me?"

- from folkore I think both "the 1" and "exile" fit pretty well

Especially "and it took you 5 whole minutes to pack us up and leave me with it" and the whole bridge with "you didn't even here me out. You never gave a warning sign/I gave so many signs"

- also "this is me trying"

With "I didn't know if you care if I came back. I have a lot of regrets about that." "But I'm here in your doorway. I just wanted you to know, that this is me trying" (Anthony)

"and it's hard to be at a party when I feel like an open wound. It's hard to be anywhere these days when all I want is you. You're a flashback in a film real on the one screen in my town"

- you're loosing me (right before the Anthony left smosh)

"do I throw out everything we built or keep it?" "my face was gray but you wouldn't admit that we were sick"

- New Year's Day (hurts during the "break-up" era, but also feels very healing atm tbh)

"don't read the last page. But I stay when it's hard, or it's wrong, or we're making mistakes"

"hold on to the memories, they will hold on to you"

"Please don't ever become a stranger, whose laugh I could recognize anywhere"

Honourable mentions:

- I wish you would

- you are in love

- long live

- the very first night

- hits different

Sorry this was way longer than intended lmao.

And mostly angsty

Hope you enjoy some of them tho! :D

ANOTHER IANTHONY SWIFTIE BLESSED DAY