#also worried that if i reread it then my own fic might end up looking too similar

[dangans-ur-ronpas]

i wanna reread affected (Laurea) but. the agonies

[aristocratic-otter]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers (except me because obvs I have done it). Spread the self-love ❤

Thank you, @artsyunderstudy, @skee3000, and @roomwithanopenfire for the ask.

  Hmmm, Ok. I guess I’ll choose based on which of my own fics I actually reread the most. That means my favorites are: 

A Real Doll

My first explicit fic, written for the Monster Under the Bed fest, this was where I really started to feel like I could be up there writing with the fanfic gods I’d looked up to. @captain-aralias liked it, that was an achievement! This was actually very very loosely based on a CSI fanfic I read forever ago (really, the only similarity was a lifelike sex doll), but in it Baz decides to try to wank his feelings for Simon away in a much more involved fashion by basically fucking a sex doll he makes that looks like Simon. But then Simon walks in on this happening and, well...you’ll have to read it to find out. 

A Fucked-Up Cinderella Story

This was my first EGF fic, and, more importantly, my first collaboration. Working with @frjsti was eye-opening in so many ways. I found out how wonderful it can be when a writer and artist work together, and how much greater the result is than either could accomplish alone. 

Plus, I’m still amused by the titular joke. 

In this fic, Baz was kept home by Malcolm after the vampire attack, for fear both of what other mages might do to him, and out of worry that Baz himself wouldn’t be able to control his vampire urges. 

In a misguided attempt to convince Baz that he can like women, Malcolm offers to hire him a male escort, with the twisted idea that if Baz doesn’t like having sex with a male, he might swing back to females. 

Enter Simon, who’s offered a shit-ton of money by a very discreet agency to provide one night of unimaginable pleasure to a mysterious client...

Careful What You Wish For

Another collaboration with an artist, this time for my first COBB, I worked with the imitable @ivelovedhimthroughworse (Apricot). Apricot was a fun and generous partner, and this being a collaboration is one reason it’s a favorite. 

The other reasons have to do with me being a massive science nerd and getting to nerd out about multiple universe theories, and with this being my first fully original plotty work (previous ones either weren’t plotty, or were based on existing movies/stories/history).

In Careful, Simon, in a fit of rage, accidentally wishes that Baz had never been born. This catapults him into a universe that never had a Baz Pitch and Simon has to learn how much he actually cares about Baz (and don’t worry, Baz himself enters the story before too long).

Gates of Ivory and Horn

This was a gift fic for @prettylightsbigcity, and what I like so much about it is how it gave me a chance to play with mythology, with the boundary between life and death, and with the ripple effects of one choice on future timelines. Plus, some very hot scenes and plenty of angst, it’s exactly the type of fic I choose to read when others write it. 

When the Oneiroi, Greek gods of dreams in the form of ravens, attack Watford, Simon is one of the first to fall. He’s trapped in a dream where he’s offered the choice of two gates. The catch is, one gate shows only truth, one shows only falsehoods. If he chooses the wrong gate, he’ll be trapped in the dream forever. 

But how could a future where he ends up with Baz be the true one?

For the last, I’m torn between three or four other fics, but I think I’ll go with The Naked Next.  It was a gift fic for @raenestee, and one of several fics set in the same universe.  I’m choosing this because it gave me a chance to be fun and silly, but also nerd out on some of my favorite science topics. And it let me write SnowBaz into one of my favorite (silly) Star Trek episodes. And most off all, I got to work with a lovely bunch of people, including @facewithoutheart, @you-remind-me-of-the-babe, @cutestkilla, @mostlymaudlin, @thewholelemon, and @artsyunderstudy (and others who may yet be revealed. The expansiveness of the universe we’ve built together is endlessly thrilling for me, and I’m grateful to @facewithoutheart for inviting me to be involved. 

In this story, Simon is the Bajoran rebel turned Starfleet security chief on the Redemption. Baz is his half-Cardassian former roommate/ nemesis and constant obsession. When the Redemption answers a distress call to a vessel where people are acting like the whole world is a party, some of the away team unfortunately bring a contagion back to the Redemption with them. 

In the timeless words of Porky Pig, Th-th-th-that’s all, folks!

[lunar-years]

hi! love your blog. I was wondering if you have any fic recs? I’m especially looking for royjamiekeely but I’m flexible :) thank you!!

Hi! I have read a lot of the R/J/K tag, and gosh, there is seriously so much incredible stuff in there. It sort of depends on what kind of vibe you're going for, but here are a few* to get you started.

Note: many of these are rated M or E, so please check the actual warnings and ratings and summaries before reading :)

Start with author inlovewithnight and literally just read everything they've ever written, it is all completely brilliant and there is something for all tastes. My personal favorites are the blood in my mouth, I wish it was mine and they threw me a whirlwind and I spat back the sea, but do be aware those are definitely darker/heavier fics and heed the tags!!! (the first has quite bit of noncon [not between RJK] and the second involves physical abuse initiated by James Sr.). For a lighter option I recommend Follow the Hearts and You Can't Go Wrong which is a lovely future R/J/K fic about the end of Jamie's career

from there move along to @valonia47 (Ao3) and @belmottetower (Ao3) and Mixtape Star (Ao3) and also read everything they've written :) I wanted to single out favorites for you but how could I when it's all so very good?

our bodies touch and the angels cry by lennynards: R/J/K that starts out with Roy & Jamie having to stay within 10 feet of each other at all times after both accidentally drinking a weird tea Jane brewed up for Beard. Yes it sounds like a completely ridiculous premise but it is one of my favorite RJK fics ever, 12/10

In Colour series by lyricl: this one feels so very true to canon and it just gets them all so right, I don't know how else to describe it. It's not a complete series though and nobody has actually gotten together as of yet, fyi. They're all far too busy having a lot of complex (& horny) feelings about each other from afar.

This might be a long shot that's not quite what you're looking for but, For Now series by Wild Wren. It's actually mostly a Roy/Keeley series, and I started reading it on a whim because I literally ran out of new things to read in the R/J/K and Jamie tags at one point, lol. Then it ended up being some of my favorite fanfic of all time. It's Roy/Keeley but like, in a not normative and also very kinky way that does a great deep dive into their respective ~issues~. Also Wild Wren had them break up even before the show had them break up, and in a much better and far more detailed way, just saying!! Part 4 is pre-ot3 in the messiest possible way. What a brilliant series, I cannot recommend it enough.

Outgrow the shoes of expectations by @destinationtoast : Brilliant on the ot3 side of it and even better on the character study of each individual within the ot3. Sooo so good. I think about it all the time.

another box with a question mark by irishmizzy: going to be completely honest when I say I don't fully remember this one, but I do know it was very funny and excellent and it is also rated T which makes it different from a lot of the others on my list, so i wanted to include!! It is in my bookmarks and I'm going to be rereading it asap now :)

something that's so close by @ohlafraise : s3 outtake that is very funny and perfect and lovely and also happens to be rated T :) also check out one night upon the shore by the same author. It's Jamie/Keeley, but don't worry Roy's there in spirit. You'll see. That one is very much not T though, lol

by any other name by renecdote: Jamie accidentally wears a Kent jersey instead of his own jersey on the pitch and the internet thinks they're dating (spoiler: they are dating). Who cares if it's not realistic because it's so hilarious and wonderful, amen.

Oh Lord, You've Never Been so in Love by asexual-fandom-queen. I literally just read this one, it's hot off the presses and it is so sexy and tender and also just gets these three so very right. the perfect anecdote to the end of s3.

Anddd of course I have to self promo a little and recommend you Waterfalls (between seasons 1&2 canon divergence), The Full Picture (s3: Jamie attempting to parent-trap RoyKeeley while avoiding his feelings for both of them) and my new one Confetti (ot3 fluff where they celebrate Phoebe's favorite holidays)

*I said I'd give a few and then proceeded to be really long about it, but like, what else is new? For that reason I've tried to stick to strictly R/J/K fics, but if you'd like Roy/Jamie or gen fic/Jamie fic recs also let me know because I could totally make a whole separate post about those, lol.

[yarameijer]

Hiiii Yara!!!!

I have changed accounts bc I forgot my password, but I was Flan-Girl304! I have been commenting in ur fics for years now lol, except in the last couple of updates, bc, yk, lost my password.

Anyways, I was rereading Accidental Reverse, as one does, and now I really want to know your opinion on the relationship between Sengoku and Tenma, because I love the idea of Sengoku being so protective and caring of the rest of the team and noticing Tenmas problems/struggles early on.

He really is like a pilar of peace between all the chaos of raimon, isn't he? (Most of the time)

Also, completely unrelated, but I just realized how long it has been since Accidental Reverse started, I was still in school. Now I'm on my last year in pyschology. And now knowing the struggles of university, I absolutely understand ur updating schedule, I haven't updated my own fics in ageeeees. But I'm still hyped for whatever you decide to post in the future!

Anyways, hope you're doing well!!!

WHOAAA I CAN’T BELIEVE IT, it’s been so long!!! Hi!!! How have you been??

I'm good, just super tired! University's been pretty demanding and I ended up pulling an all-nighter last night to almost completely finish my thesis, so I am going to bed very very soon.

‘’rereading, as one does’’ you know it’s almost 300K, right

Aww Sangoku, yes we love him. He’s great. He’s the best, hands down. He’s the voice of reason, the eye of the storm; he fades into the background when compared to other members on the team, both in terms of personality and appearance (...pink hair, anyone?)

I headcanon that Sangoku is the eldest on the team and that makes him feel responsible for his teammates. We know from the anime he’s already a very caring and responsible person, as shown by his interactions with his mother; she works late often, so he is in charge of groceries and cooking and other chores. He was canonically captain before Shindou and never really got rid of some habits from that time.

Which means that, just like Shindou, Sangoku understands Tenma's struggles as captain and tries to support him as much as possible; he did the same thing when Shindou was made captain after him, although of course the specifics are different because Tenma and Shindou are different. Sangoku doesn't really interfere with the leadership part; he's not one of the loudest voices on the team, and he doesn't want to be. He can leave the decision making to Shindou, Kirino, Tenma, Tsurugi, all the more outspoken members, all more qualified and talented than him - that’s what he thinks.

Instead he tries to help in more subtle ways: by caring.

(This doesn’t just apply to Tenma, of course. Sangoku keeps an eye on the whole team - literally and figuratively. He’s the keeper, he’s always in the back, always in position to keep watch over his teammates during a match, and that doesn’t end when the match does.)

He keeps an eye on Tenma whenever he can. Does he look tired? Upset? Ill? If Sangoku notices this, depending on the severity, there's a few different things he might do. If it's not that bad, he'll usually cue in the other first-years and let them drag Tenma along to hang out and unwind for a bit. The quickest way to get Tenma to forget about his worries for a bit is to let him spend time with his yearmates and act his age. They're a chaotic bunch and there's no room for worry or stress there.

If it's worse, Sangoku might interfere more directly. If it's more of an internal problem in the team, Sangoku can and will tell the others to lay off (Shindou means well, but sometimes he gets carried away). The rest of the team listens to him, and this is a rare enough event that the few times he's had to do it, it's been very effective.

If it's an external problem, Sangoku can't honestly do much. In those cases the whole team is stressed and trying to support each other, and as much as he wishes he could, Sangoku can't just go up to their opponents and tell them to knock it off. Instead, he'll ensure (by teaming up with the managers) that there's enough snacks and drinks present for everyone, and try to keep them all calm and rational.

Sometimes, when Tenma is being especially stubborn, Sangoku will outright scold him and tell him to go home, go to bed, take a break. Tenma definitely doesn't like this, but he respects Sangoku too much to deny him.

It's even happened a few times that someone else on the team cued in Sangoku. They know Tenma will listen to him, even when he's being stubborn, and they're not afraid to misuse it.

And always Sangoku is just ready with a listening ear, an offer to help, little check-ins, even when nothing bad is happening and Tenma is just busy or mildly stressed.

Like I said, Sangoku does this with most of the team, but he's more aware of Tenma. This, again, stems from having been captain himself. Early on, when Tenma became captain, Sangoku worried and tried to make sure the kid was doing alright, and that just stuck. Even years later after Tenma has proven himself more than capable, it's an old instinct that Sangoku can't get rid of.

And Tenma doesn’t really… know? Sure, after being captain for so long, he knows the dynamics of his team. How Sangoku is the voice of reason - no, rather, how he’s the calm inside the storm, the one who worries quietly and cares for them all and has taken the responsibility to watch over them through their craziest adventures and laziest days. He knows, by logical reasoning and several late night instances where Sangoku was the one to check up on him and tell him to get some rest, that Sangoku does it for him too and he appreciates that more than he could ever say. He just doesn’t notice that Sangoku is a little more keyed into his well being specifically - probably the only one who does is Shindou, and that’s because Shindou is the exact same way, for the exact same reason (they both agreed to make yet another first-year captain, when they know the burden of it; they refuse to let him drown under the pressure).

So Tenma hasn’t noticed, is not as close with Sangoku as some of their other teammates, and Sangoku honestly doesn’t mind. Truth be told, after so much time he barely notices it himself, it’s just become a habit.

Their relationship is interesting because they don't really hang out outside of the team - sure, if the team will go out together, they'll both join if they can, but they don't usually meet up with just the two of them. They’re both closer with other people on the team. Their relationship originated as simply senpai and kouhai - Sangoku feeling a sense of responsibility towards a younger teammate, Tenma looking up and listening to an older teammate. And yet it’s grown so much from what it was. Tenma knows Sangoku's door is always open and he can always count him. Sangoku respects Tenma as his captain, and cares for him as a friend rather than a kouhai.

Funnily enough, they’ve got a bit of a similar opinion on taking care of the rest of the team. Perhaps Tenma has been unconsciously imitating Sangoku’s behavior in the way he cares for them, and even handles them when they’re acting rash. It actually makes Sangoku his biggest ally in getting the team to behave! As we see in Accidental Reverse, Tenma is fully capable of being the craziest on the team, but in his actual timeline where he's captain, he's usually the semi-responsible one, if you'll believe it (in his defense, if something happens, he's the one who has to deal with the paperwork). And Sangoku is most often the voice of reason on the team, so he will fully support Tenma when they're trying to get the team to NOT do anything stupid for once.

So yeah. In summary, this is a relationship that was at the start nothing more than regular senpai and kouhai, and funnily enough never changed much in their roles - but the sentiment behind it? That has become much more genuine. Sangoku doesn’t look out for Tenma and feel responsible because that’s what is expected of him, but because it’s Tenma. And Tenma doesn’t respect and listen to Sangoku because he’s older, but because Sangoku has time and time proven that there are few people Tenma truly appreciates and admires more.

So! I hope you enjoyed that. Oh, don’t mention how long I’ve been working on AR, I know exactly how you feel. I uploaded the preview for it on my sixteenth birthday. In less than three weeks I’ll be celebrating my twenty-third.

I am still planning to continue though, I just need to deal with stubborn characters who don’t want to be written, tss.

It was really great hearing from you again!

[99corentine]

Corentiiiine!

First of all I want to say that I love love love Gol Hah Dov! Definitely one of my absolute favourite fanfics of all time. I'm on my 5th or so reread at the moment and love it just as much as when I first ready it. The way you write the relationship between Miraak and Chrysanthe scratches that fated-enemies-to-lovers itch perfectly.

I loved GHD so much that it has inspired me to start writing my own Miraak/LDB fanfic, I have read most of fics available but want more! I have been planning it for ages (an embarrassing amount of time and many, many notebooks in fact) but have just started writing it out officially. The first chapter is very nearly done, and I have plotted up to the final act, but I just wanted to ask how you found the writing process and managed to keep motivated? I haven't evenn published it yet, but I'm already worried that it won't hold up to the other fics out there, especially one as amazing as GHD. I also fear I have bitten off quite a lot with the amount I want to write, and keeping momentum may be difficult.

Thank you again for sharing Gol Hah Dov with us! I look forward to reading Tooth for a Tooth, Tavstarion is another favourite ship of mine and if it's anything like your other fics I'm sure to love it!

Hello, and thank you so much for such wonderful words! I too have been re-reading GHD as I'm proofreading it one last time at the moment, and it's been interesting to see how my writing style and preferences have changed over the course of the story. I'm very proud of how it turned out, and endlessly bowled over by how many people have come forward to tell me they liked it. My dumb self-indulgent story about a 2011 game! It's crazy that it's had so much attention.

You can never over-plan for a story, so having a number of notebooks worth of planning is a great start! I would say you'll want to write the first few chapters before publishing it, just to assure yourself that you're going to keep writing - I have written loads of stuff I was sure would turn into an epic longfic and I never made it past chapter one or two, sometimes it's just like that. When you're confident you'll keep going, publishing it will then motivate you to do more.

I've covered a little of my writing process in this guide I knocked together (which you may have already seen). I'd say specifically for writing motivation, these three things work for me:

Absolutely DO NOT discuss the plot or story arcs in great detail with anyone, as mentioned in my guide this will demotivate you to actually create a finished piece of writing. Holding onto that cool plot thing you want to show to the world and what people's reactions to it might be will fuel you to Write The Thing

Sometimes it's hard to get stuff down on paper, and when that happens eventually I just brute force it: sit down, no distractions, no phone, and force myself to write something, anything, even if it's garbage. I kind of hold myself hostage sometimes, e.g. I'm not allowed to watch this TV show/play this game/do this other project until I've worked on this one

It's helpful to break writing down into smaller chunks. You mentioned you've bit off a lot, can you break it down into story arcs or segments? If you do you'll be writing not to the end (a distant and unattainable-feeling finish line), but just to the end of the next story arc, which is less daunting.

As for quality, I wouldn't worry about that because you'll improve over the course of your story. I loved the events in the early chapters of GHD (scary Miraak is my favourite Miraak) but I think the writing of the later chapters is much, much technically better, because writing so much made me improve. We're also our own worst critics, of course! So your writing is likely better than you think, and it can only grow.

Best of luck to you with it! A longfic is no easy endeavour (and Tooth for a Tooth is probably going to be enormous too...) and it takes a lot of patience and perseverence, but I believe in you!

[olderthannetfic]

Sometimes I think about that time when I found a fic that clearly followed the plot of a fic written by astolat. A fic she written over 10 years ago, but still.

I made a comment saying, hey, this seems super similar to another fic I’ve read. did you get inspired by astolat?

And they said, ok yeah. Sorry, forgot to mark it as a remix. My bad, it’s fixed.

But I wonder if that author really did make a mistake, or were they trying to plagiarize astolat before getting caught? I’m not a fic writer, so I’m asking is forgetting to mark a fic as a remix actually an easy mistake to make?

Ps The notes says the fic is self-indulgent and written in just an hour, which makes me suspicious. “Self-indulgent” has the connotation that it came from only you, “written in an hour” makes me think you read it and rewrote it on an hour.

Do I have something, or am I just reading too much into this?

--

I think you have something, but I also wouldn't worry about it. Ideas are cheap. Execution is what matters.

I periodically run across fics where it looks like torture, but really, the characters are just undercover and it's a BDSM thing (little do the bad guys know). And one of them demands the other as payment at the end to get them out of there. I've written something more or less like this myself, though not pre-negotiated.

And if I know the author, I'll be like "So... that one QuiObi fic?" and they'll be like "Fuck yes!"

Unless I actually dug up what the hell the name of that fic was, reread it, and copied it a lot more closely, I'd never bother crediting it for such a basic trope any more than I'd credit the trope where one hero is like "What monster came up with this villain's trap???" and it turns out to be from the other hero's trashy novels.

(It's The Jewel of the Nile. It's always The Jewel of the Nile. In my fic. In every other Sleuth of the Ming Dynasty fic. Seriously, it's always this movie. An entire generation of viewers imprinted on that damn joke.)

Granted, this sounds like it was a lot more than just one trope, but even whole plots are a dime a dozen.

It wouldn't be surprising if they didn't think credit mattered that much or if they thought everyone would notice anyway because astolat is popular. Or maybe they were trying to get away with some shit. But even then, I can't work up much emotion over it because it's not the facts of astolat's plots that make people like her fic: it's the sum total of how she writes them.

I'm trying to think about why I don't usually care about this when I do care about the kind of nonfiction idea theft Hbomberguy did that video about. I think it's because most cases of the latter involve significantly more research to come up with the nonfiction idea, so there's a lot more pretense of intellectual work and originality. The plagiarist is citing the original researcher's sources as though they found them on their own.

For fiction, unless it's a barely-rephrased version of the original, it feels like much of the work was the actual writing of the prose, and the second author did do that themselves. They might have first encountered the tropes in a particular fic... but they weren't exactly very original there either.

I might feel differently if I read the actual fic in question though.

[leonenjoyer69]

Wanted to ask something about your bbg Elias, s there any difference between his face shape to Robert's the way Edward is different from Henry?👀

Been a while since I've last read your fic about Elias (two weeks in total but MAN those were some ling weeks-) so I might be forgetting stuff or small details about it cmdbcjbdksbxksbd

Don't worry, I forget things about my own fics very quickly 💀 I need to reread it and pump out the next chapter already, no matter how much I may dislike it. Also, honestly I've rambled and come up with so much stuff seperately from the story that I don't even remember what lore has been included in it! I just know there's really not much at all 💀 But!!! Yes there are differences! Uh, more below the cut cuz I'm gonna include art and stuff lmao

Okay, so, first of all, Elias's face is less round than Lanyon's, and a bit shorter. basically, his jaw is a bit more refined and also less chubby than Lanyon's, I guess. You know how hyde's face is shorter and chubbier/rounder than Jekyll's? Yeah, well, since Lanyon's already got his cute chubby cheeks, I figured Elias could lose some of that, he's still got very squishable cheeks tho, lil fella :3

otherwise, other facial differences include:

-lighter freckles, but still definitely visible, and he may have more than Lanyon

-lighter(?), less saturated skin

-usually has more of a flush on his cheeks

-less round eyes, generally have a more squinted look, since he's more sensitive to light (blue and green eyed gang with a sensitivity to light, rise up!)

-eyebags/sunken eyes

-hair is a pretty obvious one, they have completely different hair types (what those types are I couldn't tell you tho) and colors (and lengths, obviously)

-more scrunched up nose, basically always has that line between his eyes on his nose. kinda gives a small feeling that he's always a little disgusted, though people kinda got used to it as his usual appearance.

-funky lil eyebrows! They kinda end like Jekyll's do, with the little squiggle, but way less extreme and more up than down, if that makes sense? (pic of him bald for ref lmao) this is something that usually doesn't get noticed I feel because of how his hair covers them

-when front facing, he has the same lil nose thing that Lanyon has, that goes over the bridge of his nose and under his eyes. He's also just inherently got this insanely sad look I suppose 💀

And then there's,,,, this one. Uh, his body is far more lithe than Lanyon's, and his ribs show a bit. His freckles also span his chest and back and shoulders like Lanyon's do. His collar bones and such are also more present

OTHERWISE, for comparisons, this is,,,, one of the 3 times (basically) I've drawn Lanyon, and I don't really like it ngl, messed up the eyes too much, but some of the differences should kinda be visible.

Otherwise, there's also this piece--

Where I like how Lanyon looks and kinda,,, don't like how Elias looks, bc I kept messing up HIS eyes and mouth 💀 literally the best Lanyon I've drawn tho, shout out to this Lanyon specifically 🗣️🗣️

Anyways!!! Yeah!!! They certainly have their differences, as well as their similarities, I love my babies so much and I really really need to update my fic... Once the English language returns to me. Thank you for the ask, and I'm glad you enjoy my story and characters :D

[fexalted]

I'd love to hear about "go - and you and i" & "st - the balancing of the sun"!!!

wip title ask meme

(didn't get to this earlier bc i have been taking some ill-advised naps and remaining comatose for hours on end, so thank you for your patience sgdnshfks)

and you and i: so, in my mind i wanted this to be a fic about the ways aziraphale and crowley love each other and how it physically (and perhaps metaphysically) feels different for both of them. but apparently i spent too much time writing it in my head and not enough writing it in the actual file, bc i only have like two scenes and a handful of random sentences lmao (don't be like me) also as a fun fact: the title comes from the Yes song of the same name! absolutely gorgeous track, the lyrics never once mention the word "love," but it has so much love pouring out of it that it doesn't need to

here's one bit of it, feat. aziraphale and grief (don't worry crowley's not dead or anything, they just had a falling out):

You throw yourself into work, taking on as many assignments from Heaven as you can, and running the bookshop in between. In the off hours you catalogue and reorganize and repair anything that needs it. It helps, you think, to have distractions, things to push that all-encompassing grief out of the way so you can breathe again. No time for frivolous things like theaters or bakeries or rereading your favorite poetry collection for the hundredth time. No time to think about anything that might remind you of Crowley.

And it works, to a point. It gets easier to not think about him.

But it always catches up to you, often when you least expect it.

You'll be sitting at your desk, ready to take up the task of rebinding a book, not thinking much about anything at all. And then you'll blink and all at once your vision will have gone completely cloudy, and another blink will have tears flooding uncontrollably from your eyes, and you'll push your chair back quickly to avoid any droplets falling on the book, and fumble to press a handkerchief to your face as you're overtaken by heaving sobs.

And so you'll remain for a length of time that could be anywhere between minutes or days but feels like a century—but it hasn't even been a century, and you've been apart much longer than that before anyway so why does it still hurt so much—

After that time has passed, you'll pick yourself up, and wipe off your face. You'll take the damaged book in hand, closing it carefully and delicately, once more hiding the inscription that Crowley had written on the inside cover when he gave it to you. And you'll put that book away, not back to its rightful shelf, but tucked away far out of sight but never quite out of mind, with all the other things you can't bring yourself to look at anymore.

And then you'll go back to work.

---

the balancing of the sun: this is the mccoy-centric sfs fic i've shared some of before! title comes from the song "on the silent wings of freedom" by Yes. admittedly the chaotic instrumentation does not fit the fic's vibe at all, but the lyrics bro..... "on the darkest night so painful / do you hunger for love / midst the torture of being one" like!!! i'm out of my mind about it

anyway i hadn't made much progress in several months but i went in and finally nailed down the opening paragraphs just for you 😘:

The worst part of this whole mess, in your opinion, isn't that Spock stuck his katra in your head. It was disorienting as hell, of course, to suddenly feel a disconnect from your thoughts and actions, like they were no longer entirely yours. Going from having complete control one moment, to feeling like a mere passenger in your own body the next is not an experience you'd recommend. But to tell the truth—though you'd be hard pressed to ever admit it aloud—there was something... relieving, almost calming, about finding out it was Spock's presence in your head. You may wish he'd had the decency to ask first, or at least would've given you a heads-up beforehand, but no, having Spock in your mind isn't the worst part.

And it's not the subtle but all too noticeable way your friends look at you now, like it's not really you they're seeing. How when words come out of your mouth in a different tone and cadence, you can see it in their faces, somewhere between hope and heartbreak, before you're even aware of what you'd said or how you'd said it.

Nor is it this fool-headed mission to Genesis you're all on now, however guilty you may feel for having gotten them roped into this, however much you might wish you'd been successful in chartering a flight out there alone. They broke you out of holding for this, they stole the Enterprise for this, they're putting their lives and careers on the line for this, because of you. The danger of it all aside, you're already dreading the court martial awaiting each of you if you make it back to Earth in one piece.

No, the worst part, you think, is what it will mean to succeed. To recover Spock's body from Genesis, bring him home to Vulcan, and lay him to rest—body and soul.

Because to do so will mean losing him all over again.

[roosterbox]

The Secret Bonus October Drabble: Cider

Pairing: Steddie

Wordcount: 500

Additional tags: Tooth-Rotting Fluff, my first time writing for this ship, implied future sexytimes

Info: this was one of the random word drabbles (or attempts at drabbles) I wrote for October. This one, however, didn’t end up getting posted because I was unsatisfied with the end result. Especially because it was my first real attempt at writing for this ship. Since I’m working on putting the other drabbles into their own little fic for AO3, i figured I’d reread this one. And you know, it’s not actually too bad. Might put it in with the others in fact. Either way, it was just languishing away in my notes, not doing anything for anybody so… here we go!

———

At the first bite, Eddie made a face.

“Steve, babe, I think you cooked this cake a bit too long.”

Steve’s brow furrowed. “What? Is it too dry? It looked okay coming out…”

“No it’s-“ Actually perfectly moist, he thought. If it were any other flavor, he wouldn’t have said anything. But-“You let all the alcohol bake out of it.”

Steve rolled his eyes. “That’s because there is no alcohol, dummy. I used the sweet cider instead.” At Eddie’s surprised look, he continued. “Like I was gonna serve the kids a boozy cake, come on now.”

“It matters to me! The taste is all wrong!”

“And what, exactly, is wrong with it?”

Eddie opened his mouth, but found that he had no actual reply. The cake, an experimental recipe from Steve, was absolutely delicious. A triumph. One they would likely be repeating for many a Fall season to come. And really, what his boyfriend said made sense. But Eddie was in a contradictory mood.

“Baking makes the alcohol content almost negligible, you know. It burns off.”

“Were you planning to get drunk off of a cake?” Steve’s eyes were twinkling despite his serious expression. He chose not to comment on Eddie avoiding his earlier question.

“No! I just-“

“Did you forget about the non-alcoholic stuff?” At that, Eddie pouted.

“No, quit teasing me.“

Steve took his own bite of the cake. Even though he’d had the chef’s privilege of tasting it at every stage of the process, he couldn’t help groaning in pleasure at the flavor.

Eddie was watching him quite intensely. He must have heard the noise Steve made. Which was fine by him.

“So tell me,” Steve said, speaking slowly. “Alcohol aside. What, exactly, is wrong with my cake?”

They stared each other down. Steve knew the answer was nothing. He’d just tasted the damn thing and it was perfect. But he also knew that Eddie, in addition to being stubborn to a fault, was very creative. If anyone could invent a problem that wasn’t actually there, it was him. After a few moments, however, the other man visibly deflated.

“Nothing. Absolutely nothing. It’s delicious. You’ve outdone yourself, sweetheart.”

“That’s what I thought,” Steve leaned over to kiss Eddie’s cheek, right where he knew a dimple would be. His boyfriend looked away, obviously fighting a smile. “Don’t worry, big guy, I’ve still got plenty of the good stuff. Just for you.”

At that, Eddie turned, raising an eyebrow. “Oh yeah?”

“Oh yeah.”

Now he was fully smiling. “What kind of good stuff are we talking about?”

Steve took Eddie’s hand and brought it to his lips, leaving a lingering kiss on the knuckles. He then moved it to his hip where Eddie, ever bold, immediately reached a bit further back to grab a handful of his lover’s ample backside.

“All kinds of good stuff.”

Eddie growled, more of a purr actually, and pulled Steve closer. The hand on Steve’s ass squeezed tighter. “I like the sound of that.”

[nire-the-mithridatist]

Hello, Nire! I saw your reblog earlier and it made me reread. Thanks! Gosh, I miss them.

Picking a passage from this piece was /hard/. In the end, it's either The Mirror/Glass or The Wall, but I went with Mirror.

“I’m okay—it’s just… I’m really dead,” she said wonderingly. “You know, they say people never really get to see what they look like, because mirrors are reverse images and cameras distort and—what I’m saying is, have I always looked like that?”

“No,” he replied, low enough that if anyone walked in, they would assume that he was talking to the dead body. “You were alive.”

“I don’t feel dead, is the thing,” she said. “I can feel everything you’re feeling. When you walk, it feels like I’m walking. When you see things, I see them too. I mean, sure, it’s a little different—you should really get your eyes checked, by the way, I think you’re slightly myopic—and I can also sort of read your mind, but none of this feels like how I thought being dead would feel like.”

And then—

“Is this normal? I mean, you… you did this, right? I feel like this isn’t normal. Also, can you look away from my cadaver for a little bit? It’s disturbing.”

He obliged, turning his gaze ceiling-ward. His eyes watered in the face of the dry brightness of the neon lights, his throat a knot of fishbones. There were no words to quite explain what he was and what he had done; instead, he let himself think it, hurling his mind to the past—distant and otherwise—and allowed her to watch the memories unfurl, from the first time he’d eaten a soul to the moment he panicked and entombed her within him.

Eventually, she said, “I see,” and he wasn’t ready for the sheer relief brought by her matter-of-fact response. She added, after a while, “I don’t suppose you can… reverse it? Pour me back into my own body?”

A futile question, futilely asked. He didn’t bother with lies and platitudes. The knowledge was real in him: she was a shard of glass lodged in his flesh; pulling her out wasn’t going to make the mirror whole again, and he might even bleed to death from the wound. Now, there was only living with it, with her—only the pain of her fragmented life as he carried her around with him.

- i carry your heart with me (i carry it in my heart)

((THE soulmate & cohabitation fic EVER. But watch out.)) I adore this so very much and I adore you. 🧡

HELLOOOO

OKOKOK sorry this took a while but this fic is actually one of my biggest pride and joys, and definitely my favorite of all the fics I've written for Vincenzo (and I wrote... some. lmao). Anyway, the Wall is the scene that I had wanted to write from the beginning, it was probably the reason this fic existed at all. I can talk about that (and the media that inspired it in the first place) FOREVER.

But that's not the scene you asked about, hehehe, so I'll restrain myself.

The Mirror scene as you dubbed it is part of the story set-up; as far as fantasy stories go, this one is definitely very soft fantasy, but I needed to set some rules anyway. Like, the obvious question is, can he spit her soul back out into her body? Definitely not or we wouldn't have a story (or well. it would be a very different story) but Cha Young would ask that question, and the reader would probably ask that question. So the main thing the scene asserts is that she's not coming back to life like nothing ever happened. This is permanent. The story is about them permanently stuck together in his body. I was actually kind of worried people would be mad at me for not giving them a "happy ending", but to me the happy ending lies in them learning the joy of this new shape of life they now have, rather than him carrying the guilt of her death the whole time, and I was hoping to hint at that ending through this scene.

The thing about how people never can actually see themselves is a fun fact that every so often haunts me. We don't 100% know what we look like! We know how we look like in the mirror and how we look like photographed, but neither of those are the same as how we can see other people directly, as they really are. And even here, now, Cha Young isn't really seeing herself and she never will. She's seeing her own dead body -- and dead bodies look very much unlike living ones -- through a slightly myopic pair of eyes that's not her own.

(Yet.) (Part of the story is also about how the body turns from something she borrows from him into something she actually shares ownership with him, and that's why around the wall scene their body and body parts are referred to as "their" and not "his".)

Anyway I'll stop rambling before I bore you but thank you SO much for asking about this fic and giving me an excuse to revisit it <3 <3 <3

send me a short extract from my writing and i'll give you a "dvd commentary" about it!

[wetcatspellcaster]

🌻🌷🍰🐥

thank you darling! <3

🌻 least favourite character / hardest to write

answered here!

🌷 writing achievement you want to brag about

oh my goodness, this question is a scary prospect! but I will say that having people bind my writing is something that I always used to idly dream about but assumed would never happen. I have now seen photo sets of two absolutely gorgeous hardback versions of Pieces and I've cried both times. It helped that they were both sexy as fuck: one looks like a kind of book subscription box special edition and the other was like a gorgeous academic tome <3

🍰 where you like to write

I tend to sit on my sofa cross legged with a cushion on my lap, and my laptop is cheap as shit so it constantly overheats.

🐥 here's some writing motivation!

hmm, I'm not sure about the wording of this question - if I'm supposed to share something that motivates me, or if I'm supposed to share something motivating??? who knows. I will go with the latter, I suppose? (I'm not very good at saying motivating things, as I get super worried about the individuality of everyone's experiences and what I find inspiring might not be for everyone etc. etc. BUT-)

in 2020, I was briefly hospitalised bc of suspected appendicitis (it wasn't that, although it was the thing I ended up getting operated on this january, 4 years later!) I hadn't prepared my bag properly bc it was sudden and I was panicking, so I didn't pack anything to do - no books, and no phone charger, either. As a result, I went a little out of my mind for a few days, with both boredom and loneliness (it was covid so hospital visitations in the UK weren't allowed), until someone I knew managed to get a phone charger to my ward at least.

With a phone charger, I could access the internet and thus the lifesaver, AO3. But I was so tired and sad and couldn't really think bc I was fasting in case of surgery, so I didn't have the energy to try anything new. So, for the first time (as I had just started writing fic that year!) I ended up... reading all of the longfic I'd written up until that point, and that kept me company until I was out of hospital.

There was a lot of things that contributed to that particular feeling - i was so very depressed at this time - but the knowledge that my fic was so comforting to me, and exactly what i needed and wanted to read, and catered specifically to me in a way that was so fucking enjoyable... I know there's a lot of tumblr posts to that effect already in the world. but the act of reading something I'd made and needed so badly in that moment gave me a whole new appreciation for my own writing, and the lovely thing was, it wasn't on anybody else's terms. it didn't need to be on ao3 getting comments/kudos for that writing to still look after me in that moment of hardship, and make me happy again. it just happened to be the easiest place to read it!

so now, whenever i start a new fic project, my baseline isn't popularity or artistic scope or anything, but, "will I reread this again when I'm sick, or anxious?"

the answer is nearly always yes, obviously, bc I'm feeding myself specifically. but it also helps me keep writing, bc I like to imagine a future me in need of comfort and I like to picture her having a completed work for company :)

☀️ summertime writers' asks! ☀️

[noperopesaredope]

Leshawna is low key so hard to write as a main character in a fic, but for a slightly weird reason if I'm being honest.

(Post talks a bit about what I have planned for my fic, but is mainly about Leshawna as a stereotype and working around that)

Warning: a bit rambly, will take a bit to get to the main point

For a bit of context: I was trying to figure out what professions/adult lives the survivors in SoW would have, mainly for the epilogue which would show how they are doing much longer down the road after the timeline of the main fic has passed. This was to both show the characters' when they have mostly recovered and bring a fulfilling end to their arcs.

I already know what I want to accomplish for Leshawna's arc: Black women are often expected to act like the stereotypical "Strong Black Woman" or at least take on some of those traits, even/especially in the face of trauma. In the fic, she and the others have gone through something incredibly and horrifically traumatic as teenagers. She proceeds to cope with this experience by refusing to cope with it and instead further building up the persona of being a SBW.

She already fulfilled this stereotype (among other such stereotypes) in the show, and I thought it would be interesting to explore that as being a bit more of a facade. Or at the very least, she was legitimately confident before the massacre, but post-Island, it becomes a facade because she feels the social pressures to keep up an image of not being affected by traumatic experiences. It's a really fun arc to deconstruct and write, especially since I am half-Black and have a lot to say about stuff like this.

BUT! When I was trying to decide her profession, I had a hard time figuring out something that would fit with her arc: specifically, not having a profession that is high stress or requires her to put others' needs and feelings before her own. A job that she legitimately enjoys where she doesn't have to be the SBW. But I also wanted it to be in character.

And that's where I ran into a problem. You see, we don't completely know every characters' interests or ambitions for the future. And this is kinda the case for Leshawna, as I was only able to really find one specific interest of hers on the wiki: dancing. But most dancing jobs are honestly really stressful. I thought of a dance job that seemed pretty fun and like something she might like, but it would like involve working with kids, and I didn't want her to fit into the few stereotypes she didn't already embody (at the time, I thought that she didn't seem like she would take care of kids outside of paid babysitting. So then at least she wouldn't fulfill the Mammy stereotype!).

Then, when I was re-looking on the character page, I saw something interesting:

"While not on Total Drama, she volunteers to better the lives of other teenagers less fortunate than she is. A goal of hers is to one day open her own community center."

And this made me realize something.

You see, basically the whole fandom is aware that she is a walking stereotype (but we still love her), and I wanted to make her a bit less stereotypical (I just don't like the feeling of writing stereotypical characters) and explore any and all potential depth she has to offer. But I also really wanted to do this without completely leaving out the most significant aspects of her personality, and more importantly, the parts of her that make her such a great and likable character.

Unfortunately for me, the more I thought about her as a character and generally reread her personality description (because I need those as a reminder sometimes), I realized that the large majority of her most key traits are those stereotypes. One of the hardest ones to avoid was her more caring side, because a (overthinking everything) part of me was worried that it might be fitting with some of the stereotypes related to taking care of others. But that's something I like about her! So then I tried to excuse it with "she's only like that with her friends! She just mainly cares about her friends."

And these the quote from the wiki came along and slapped me in the face with a cold, hard truth. And that truth was this:

Leshawna is, at the core, a caring person who wants to help and comfort others. Yes, she can hate certain people with a passion and show it. Yes, she did what she did in Action. Yes, she can be selfish sometimes. But at the end of the day, when all is said and done, she is a kind and loyal person who will go out of her way to help people, as long as they aren't a-holes. She is a supportive friend who stands up for others and helps them when they are feeling low. And that is one of the most key parts of what makes her such a likable and amazing character. Some of those traits can be described as caring and nurturing and endlessly supportive and putting others first all in a way that would fit into various harmful tropes.

But those are the traits that make her so beloved. In fact, many of her other more stereotypical traits are part of what make her so likable. She has moments of outward aggression more frequently than other characters, thus being an "Angry Black Woman", but that is often due to reasons that the audience can sympathize with. It can even be cathartic to see her be unafraid to openly yell at people who honestly deserve it, and even more so when she just straight up beats the crap out of characters like Heather. We respect her for it.

She is sassy, but again, she is mostly sassy towards characters who deserve it, and at the end of the day, people just straight up like sassy and snarky characters a lot of the time. I mean, Noah is a fan favorite. Heck, he's my favorite (besides Leshawna, obviously).

She could be seen as a "sassy loyal Black bestie" to Gwen and other characters, but the fact that she is such a good friend is one of her best qualities and is actually one of her biggest advantages, because people become loyal to her in turn.

To put it simply, you cannot easily take away many of Leshawna's stereotypical traits, because the combination of those traits are not only key elements of her character, but they are a major reason why she is such a well written and likable character.

It is practically impossible to make her "not fit into ANY stereotypical tropes." I guess the only ways you can change about her in terms of stereotypical-ness is through the role she plays in the story rather than who she is as a character. You can give her the spotlight and insecurities and an arc.

You cannot change her core. You just need to change the presentation of that core.

.

.

.

Just so random food for though, lol

(Small edit I would like to add since I didn’t clarify this in the main post: The main point I make throughout this post is that you cannot write Leshawna accurately without keeping many of her most stereotypical traits because they are essential to her core and even likability as a character. However, I would also like to clarify that I do not think this is a good thing. One of my main points that I wanted to make in this post is that that is the main reason she can be so frustrating to write.

i don’t like writing stereotypical characters, but in order to write her in a way that isn’t OOC and/or doesn’t lose what makes her memorable, she will always need to end up fitting into at least one stereotype. Because her core as a character is made up of tropes.

And as a half-Black writer who wants to write nuanced Black characters, that’s really fucking annoying)

[webslingingslasher]

Sorry for leaving everyone hanging but bestie got covid so I’ve been asleep for days! Anyways here is some of my friend’s story (note there is so much more crazy in her life but I don’t have the energy to type it all out) :

Okay so background she came to our college from across the country and fell IN LOVE with this dude here. Eventually she decided our school wasn’t for her and that she outgrew it so she dropped out and moved home. After being together for less than a year she decided to move back here alone to be with him (even though he’s currently in DC for military deployment)

So she moved here in November and everything seemed good. When I went to see her (abt an hour away from our school) and she was planning her future. They had been talking about g about marriage and he wanted her to look at houses with him when he came back. I was worried about her because he actually cheated on her at one point be she let it slide even when we said don’t get back with him. But ya know she’s her own person.

He’s 23 so the age gap was fine and she’s always been “older for her age” which is from her life experiences being treated more like an adult.

So at this point she’s living alone in his apartment and gets a job where she makes some friends and such. Including mr 31 year old.

All of a sudden the day before Thanksgiving she breaks up with him without any of us knowing. Apparently she was taken by surprise when the guy was doing nice things for her and not expecting sex in return. (And now I’m learning more abt how abusive he was). But the guy became super close with her to the point that he was there while she broke up with him. I told her that he might expect more from her at some point and to watch out but she told me it was fine and it wasn’t like that.

So she breaks up with the guy she just moved across the country for and now needs to get out of his apartment. The guy actually went crazy and made threats and had her followed so I was worried. But she decided to stay in that town where she didn’t really know anyone else which I was confused by. So then she ends up at a new apartment and having a ton of dates and one night stands. Which is fine I told her she needs to be single for a bit because even before the guy she was with another guy and never was really single.

The next thing I know it’s after Christmas and she’s dating the 31 yr old and practically living at his place. I was just on the phone with her and instantly she said they were thinking abt getting married (LIKE SOON). Please note no one in her life outside of this little town has even met him. She moved fast with the other guy but this is even faster. She’s know the guy for less than 6 months and is talking about legally marring him. Because “it proves we are committed to each other and he’s what I want for my future.”

I have NO idea how to slow this down and I’m worried she’s clinging to him because of her issues with family and also the fact that he’s able to protect her from the ex that made death threats.

Anyways that’s the chaos I deal with. On the opposite side I don’t leave my dorm on the weekends and have reread fics longer than War and Peace and Crime and Punishment combined in a few days.

-🦝

this is how abuse happens. this is how is starts.

he's made her rely on him for saftey and housing, and he's rushing into tying her down legally. i feel for her, but if she won't listen, this is going to be a hard lesson and it'll suck being a 25 year old divorcee.

[bonesandthebees]

So let’s start with Niki shall we? First of all, banter? [“No, not grey yet. But your hairline might be getting worse,” Niki teased.] on point. 10/10 childhood friends’ behaviour. Shared habits? [Wilbur watched as she began to twist the many thin rings spread across her own fingers. Wilbur wasn’t sure which one of them picked up the nervous habit first, but it was one they had shared since they were children.] There and definitely not going to end up as a tell to give away that one of them is lying.

Caring for each other’s appearance and knowing each other’s deepest secrets? Yes, both with Niki fixing Wilbur’s pendant for his and Wilbur knowing Niki was saving that dress for when she would be announced as heir. Undying loyalty? Wilbur claims so but he’s also keeping other doors open and lying to Niki’s face so I can’t wait for that to fall apart or come back to bit him.

Other important notes for the first bit [Niki’s eyes went wide. “Oh, I don’t know for sure, but I figured if anyone would know it’d be you.”] This tells you everything about Wilbur’s position. He has more info that the average person, provide by his father, and it’s very clear everyone knows it and tries to get access to it, Niki doesn’t really do it here, but she does right before dinner and Quackity also does it.

Similarly to Phil not knowing things, Wilbur not knowing things is worrisome too, because either 1. He’s not being told by his father, which should have a reason but what if it doesn’t? Or 2. He’s lying to you about what he does or does not know.

[Another possibility occurred to Wilbur. Maybe Phil didn’t know about the announcement.] <- Wilbur gets to the right conclusion, but dismisses it immediately because 1. It makes no sense for Sam not to tell his father. And 2. He looks up to his father, so of course he would know. (It’s also because he should know about these kinds of things and Sam not telling him is very worrying, because that could mean that either 1. Sam is about to do something stupid (he is) or 2. Phil’s position is in danger.

[So that left only two possibilities: Niki’s ladies were wrong, or Phil had a reason for not telling Wilbur about the announcement.] cue immediate insecurity about why his father would not tell him followed by assurance that his father would have a good reason and it’s definitely not because he doesn’t trust him (have I mentioned this boy has daddy issues yet?)

[“Well, maybe not everyone,” Wilbur amended. “But there’s a wide gap between the support you hold versus the support Quackity holds in the public eye.”] 1. Interesting, is this true or just Wilbur’s subjective point of view? Guess we’ll never know. But Phil is pushing for her so maybe she is the most favoured since she’s the default heir + grew up at the palace. 2. I’m interested to see how Tommy’s arrival may or may not change this.

Lastly, [“And you’ll be by my side, right?” / “Of course.” / “Of course,” she repeated]. I’m sure this won’t taste like ash in my mouth if I every reread this fic after it’s done. I’m sure this memory won’t be bitter in like 10 chapters. Not at all. Surely it can’t already have plotrelevant impact by the end of the chapter (I’ll get to that).

(1/?)

-🌲

I loved writing the banter at the start between niki and wilbur so much. childhood best friends is one of my favorite dynamics to write and it fits rainduo SO well. the shared habits thing as well was something I had a lot of fun including. it's definitely not going to come up later yup no siree. I just really wanted to show how comfortable they are with each other, hence niki fixing wilbur's pendant and wilbur recognizing the dress she wears as one she's been saving. they know each other inside and out, and it seems only natural that undying loyalty follows... right?

oh yeah everyone in the palace knows that wilbur has access to information. his father is the consil, so it only makes sense. wilbur has always been privy to things a bit before they happen, like if there's going to be a ball soon or if there's going to be an important person coming to visit. but also he doesn't always have access to that info, because it's usually up to phil to decide whether or not to give it to him. so it's not that unusual for wilbur not to know something like that, but it's definitely something others take note of.

yuppp even though wilbur got to the right conclusion almost immediately, he dismisses it because he can't fathom the idea of sam not telling his father something. because his father is the consil. his father knows everything. there's no way he wouldn't know something like this. it's that childish naivety rearing its head. so of course instead he concludes it's something about him specifically, and he tries not to let it get to him but it does because he so desperately craves phil's approval

while wilbur saying that is definitely at least somewhat subjective, it has solid grounding. niki is seen as the more expected choice in the country because she's spent nearly her entire life at the palace. while the 'commoners' are aware of quackity as an option, no one really takes that seriously and think it's definitely going to be niki. outside the palace, most people just assume sam's waiting until she's a bit older to announce her

oh yeah that line definitely won't age badly. not at all. :)

[angel-with-paper-wings]

11. what’s something neat you’ve learned while doing research for something you were writing? also, how much do you worry about doing research in general?

17. what is your favorite line you’ve ever written?

18. what is your most and least favorite part of writing?

54. what’s a common writing tip that you almost always follow?

70. are you very critical of your own writing? how much do you find yourself editing (either during the writing or after the fact)?

11. I will do research into a certain thing mostly just to make sure it’s inclusion in my story isn’t anachronistic. Other than that, I mostly check Google when I am writing about a specific place (ex: the Paris Opera House, Paris in general, Perros-Guirec) so that I can describe the settings of my stories as accurately as I can. Other things I have learned about are operas, late 19th century fashion, and I recently went down a Wikipedia rabbit hole about the events and people that made up the Persian government during the time where Erik would have been in Persia (literally for no reason other than I was really bored). 😅

One thing that might interest you in particular: there is a very-real train station in Paris called Gare du Montparnasse, which is even mentioned in the POTO novel as the train station Raoul used to travel to Perros-Guirec. I saw that while rereading, and immediately thought of you! 😂

17. Oh man, I have quite a few! One that immediately comes to mind is from the first chapter of LAYNLB, and what I think sums up that fic in the best way possible:

“The sound of her sobs echoed through the silence, carrying through the thin walls to the hollow space beyond. Her voice and all its sorrow was heard, but not by an angel. That night, while the rest of Paris celebrated, two souls broken by the world wept together.”

Another one that I’m proud of isn’t really a line, but it’s a transition from one scene to another. It’s from chapter 12 of LAYNLB:

“The violinist rested his hand over his beloved daughter’s hair as she sobbed, silently praying for Heaven to have mercy on her, and to send someone who could help her where he had failed.

The Phantom was in a dark mood. Well, darker than usual.”

I just love the transition from Christine’s father asking God for someone nice and patient and responsible to care for his daughter, and then we immediately see how his prayer has been answered in the form of our grumpy, scrungly, stubborn sewer goblin. 🤣

18. My favorite part of writing is when I get to write a scene that I can see so clearly in my head, and I know exactly what the characters should say/do. This happens at least once every chapter, and while it doesn’t last long, it makes for an easy time to write.

My least favorite part is actually starting. Sometimes I have a really tough time deciding how the beginning of a certain chapter or scene is supposed to start, which is why I normally begin writing scenes that will end up in the middle of a chapter. But, I try to tell myself that not every start has to be groundbreakingly good, it just has to BE.

54. One thing I try to keep in mind is to try not to use the same word over and over again to describe your character’s actions in the same scene. This is usually during a scene with a lot of dialogue, when I pull out the thesaurus and look up all the synonyms for the word “said”. I try to mix it up as much as I can, or if I have to reuse a word I make sure it is far enough away from the previous time I used it so that it sounds new when you read it.

70. I am pretty critical of myself while I am writing, and that’s why it takes me so long to write certain scenes because I just want to get them “RIGHT”. Sometimes I’ll obsess over a single line for several minutes, because I can’t find the “right” words to use. After I finish writing a scene, though, I don’t usually go back and edit it unless I have a new idea to introduce to it. Usually my first draft is my final draft just because I spend so much time on making it the way I like it the first time.

[multi-lefaiye]

13, 14, 15, 29, and 37!

hello!!!

13. What’s the best writing advice you’ve ever come across?

I don't remember where I saw this, but I think the best writing advice I've come across is that, generally speaking, there is no such thing as a bad concept. Pretty much any idea can work with the right approach! Sometimes it takes a while to find that approach, and it might be hard to make that concept work, but there's pretty much always a way.

14. What’s the worst writing advice you’ve ever come across?

That tumblr post out there that was like. This person listing a bunch of examples of figurative/descriptive language (such as describing a character as choking out words or hissing as they speak) and complaining about how it's not realistic. Like sure everyone has their own personal taste but you will take my descriptive language from my cold dead hands.

15. If you could choose one of your fics to be filmed, which would you choose?

This is a lot of power you're giving me right now. Anyway UHH out of the fanfiction I've written, if I could somehow make a film version of my Unwind fic Twelve Years that'd be pretty cool. Even if it's not done and it's been a hot fucking minute since I updated it, I think it's a fun look into a fucked up universe and an exploration of like... a character who's extremely far removed from the main characters of the series and is just trying to survive the best they can.

Out of my original WIPs, if any of them were filmed I'd be pretty excited I think, but if The Ruins of Memory was filmed that’d be fun, but it’d have to have SO many effects....

29. If you could write the sequel (or prequel) to any fic out there not written by yourself, which would you choose?

OKAY HOLY FUCK. There's a few but I'll share the one I'm thinking about the most rn.

So there's this Saw fic I read recently that will not leave my fucking head. I have reread it several times and it's already a comfort story for me. It's called Must Be A Devil Between Us by Vulcanodon (not gonna link it directly here b/c there is explicit content in the third chapter) and it's like. My favorite fic I've seen so far with the premise of Adam surviving and reconnecting with Lawrence, not knowing that Lawrence is now an apprentice for Jigsaw.

What I like about Must Be A Devil Between Us is that, imo, it uses dramatic irony very well, and even though it's focused on Adam and his perspective, it still portrays Lawrence and his psychology in a really interesting way!! I'd fucking love a continuation into this particular fic's version of the series, though I definitely respect that the author isn't planning to at this time.

Also I love that fic because there's like... a very fun bit of ironic comedy in the fact that Adam COMPLETELY misinterprets Lawrence trying to confess the whole "I'm working for a serial killer now" thing. Lawrence says that there's a secret he had to keep from his wife that ultimately ended their relationship, and he feels that Adam is someone he can be honest with and be himself. And Adam's like, "Oh he's gay? Neat. Guess I'm not as subtle as I thought about my own orientation if he only feels comfortable telling ME about it." It makes me laugh <3

Either that or a continuation of that one fic where Adam ends up in a time loop, that would also be really fucking good.

37. Talk about your current wips.

Ok we're gonna be here all day if I list every WIP, both original and not, so I'll try to keep this brief <3 I'll share one thing about each WIP.

The Ruins of Memory - This may be on hold until further notice, but don't worry, I think about my sad post-apocalyptic furries all the fucking time.

A Modern Ghost Story - Well this started as my attempt to make a fun story about ghost-hunters (in the style of Buzzfeed Unsolved) stumbling across a real haunting, but the lore's out of hand so I'm not sure where it's going now.

God Died With Wooden Bones - This story's plot is still very vague in my head but I do at least know the backstory. I have that going for me. Anyway this, if you can believe it, is chock full of bones and skeletal imagery!

CUDAAS - I really need to get a proper title for this before it's too fucking late- Anyway Alekto, one of the first book's protags, was originally meant to be a very minor character until I thought about the three personality traits I gave them and went "oh there's something here."

Bleeding Over Eden - This story is really metaphorical and I'm realizing more and more that the whole thing can be read as an allegory for coming to terms with the worst parts of yourself and moving past grief. I have a theme, evidently.

For We Are Both Fragile Things - The prequel to Bleeding Over Eden, Fragile Things is all about some really REALLY sad gay people who slowly get angry and bitter due to factors that are mostly behind their control.

Magic Apocalyptica - Wuh-oh, how did the planet get all these fucking holes in it!! This isn't one single WIP and more just a setting I've been developing but it's there.

And the unnamed WIP I'm currently referring to in my head as Sad People WIP: I'm gonna be honest that this has very little so far aside from Themes and Base Concepts but I still am thinking about it and microwaving it in my brain.

I feel like I'm forgetting things. But this is very long so I'm gonna call it for now <3