#am I making up fucking ciphers for them
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Aventurine and Sunday doomed soulmates in a yuri way... does no one else get the vision...
#aishi.txt#avenday#do u understand. theyre like rivals TO ME and im not just saying this bc#(checks my art gallery of the past year)#i have a thing for rivalmancy#they are rivals in the sense that its gotten to a point where theyre forced enemies.. diametrically opposed chess pieces#and and and#theyre like so similar in that 'in another universe we could've been great friends' like its literally WRITTEN for them#to be narrative foils to eachother....#essentially its their relationship thats been doomed from the start#which makes one not help but think... what if. what if silly au where they're just normal people#meeting at a college library or something#anyway yeah. (BITES THEM HARD)#it feels like the entirety of HSR and penacony is a timeloop with them as the main characters in my mind idk guys am I cooked#am I making up fucking ciphers for them#probably#doomed by canon? to YOU. in my head they are kissing furiously
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WIP Wednesday - Chapter 6 of The Redemption and Subsequent Death of Bill Cipher
“Am I— Did I interrupt something?” Stan asks a little awkwardly.
“Nah,” Bill, who recovers much faster from gaping at Stan like a fish, leans back into the bench before punching Pine Tree’s shoulder. “Kid was just heading out to go break windows or something.”
“Better hope it’s not these windows or [you’re] cleaning it up,” Stan tells Bill before reaching out, shoving the bill of Pine Tree’s hat down over his eyes. Pine Tree grumbles and fixes it before turning a far brighter smile on Stan.
“Your sister’s looking for you. Something about trying to make a suit out of glitter.”
“Oh. Great.” Pine Tree rubs his face and gets to his feet. “Thanks, Grunkle Stan.”
He goes to the door and pauses to look at Bill for a second.
“Just… you know, I think you’re right. I think things will be okay again soon.”
Bill’s brow furrows as Pine Tree heads back inside before he starts chuckling as he shakes his head.
“Weird kid.”
“They’re receptive,” Stan says as he takes up Pine Tree’s seat and Bill tries not to groan. “Not that you’ve made it exactly hard to miss that things are weird between you and my brother. I think the temperature in the room drops by ten degrees every time one of you walks into it. And I thought things were bad with my ex-wife! Ha!”
Bill winces at that, pulling a face as he leans forward to bury his face in his hands.
“Yeah, well, we weren’t even dating—“
“No, you two were just sucking face anytime you were left unsupervised.”
“Please, Pine Tree already got onto me for this. I fucked up and—“
“Summoned a demon, yeah, I heard.”
Bill’s blood runs cold and he looks between his fingers at Stan. …he’s not swinging, he’s not snarling, and Bill can say he’s almost positive that this isn’t Stan then.
“…and you’re cool with that?”
“What? Oh, no, absolutely not. I almost strangled you in your sleep when my brother told me.”
Billy, admittedly, feels a little better with that admission.
“He also said that you came to him to get rid of said demon.”
“Yeah, well… I don’t know. Taking over the universe is so last year.”
Stan snorts at that.
“You’re, like, really cool with that?” Bill tries again. “Don’t want to, I don’t know, punch me in the eye?”
Now Stan shrugs.
“I wouldn’t go that far, but I think watching you walk around on eggshells, convinced one of us is going to take a swing at you or tell the Axolotl—“
“Axo— Oh, wait, no, you said it right.”
“I listen. I’m just saying, you know, you with your tail between your legs ain’t a bad look. Certainly makes me feel better.”
“…but, like, the whole breaking your brother’s heart? Trying to take over the universe? You’re sure you’ve got no murder held in your very large, very family-oriented heart?”
“Don’t go tempting me, Cipher, but… Ford’s an adult, you’re… maybe an adult, I don’t know, how do demons age?”
“Depends,” Bill admits, pulling a face. “Interdimensional demons live to about a hundred millennia or so, sometimes longer if they take care of themselves.”
“You said you were a dream demon though,” Stan remembers.
“Yeah, well, that’s a little more… complicated.”
Stan cracks open his pitt cola and gestures to Bill. He debates for a second before taking in a deep breath and sighing.
“I was born an interdimensional demon, a very precocious, adorable thing. Even though they’re relatively harmless, mostly brokers for deals made between species, they’ve got their own power. It doesn’t help that I was born… different.”
Bill’s voice gets soft, thoughtful.
“They tried to understand me, probably. They couldn’t though. A world full of two-dimensional idiots, they never understood what I saw, understood how I felt. So it was, you know, a little…”
“Othering?” Stan offers and Bill nods.
“Othering. Everyone adored me. ‘Special Billy’, ‘unique Billy’, ‘Billy who sees things no one else can see’.” […crazy Billy.]
Bill grips the bench a little too tight, knuckles turning white as he looks down at the ground.
“I won’t bore you with the sob story of a universe lost to a monster,” and maybe because it’s bad enough to admit it to Ford, admitting it to Stan who he still doesn’t trust not to come swinging at him is another thing, “but I ended up alone. I was drifting through time and space for, easily, a couple millennia. I spent a lot of time floating amongst the stars I’d stared at so long. I saw galaxies born, galaxies die; I saw nebulae explode and reform; stars would go through entire lifecycles in front of my eyes. It was me and the cosmos, so I guess I didn’t feel alone.
#gravity falls#gf#BillFord#bill cipher#dipper pines#Stan pines#Stanley pines#WIP Wednesday#the redemption and subsequent death of bill cipher#trasdobc#my writing#we are back on track baby!!! this was a rough week and weekend but we are back on schedule!#chapter 6 is typed up chapter 5 is being edited and posted today and then I’m working on chapter 7#as always this story is evolving almost faster than i can keep up with it#we’re getting some new faces (new to the story#old to anyone who’s watched gravity falls) in chapter 7#but mostly I’m trying to get the fuck out of bill and ford are fighting land#to all the people who’ve been like oh they’re so cute oh I’m just so happy for their soft moments: I’m very sorry for these next three#or so chapters#there is no softness here#go back and reread chapter 4#but BUT things do get better again#i promise#i am physically incapable of writing anything that isn’t a happy ending#i will stop making them fight and I might even stop cockblocking them#maybe#we’ll see
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I don’t know what I’m doing anymore.
#my art#pearlescentmoon#geminitay#goodtimeswithscar#mabel pines#stanley pines#dipper pines#bill cipher#and I’m there too :]#it’s 1 AM I am making self insert drawings for gravity falls. what the fuck is up with my brain#BUT. I HAVE 6 1/3 PAGES OF NOTES DONE SO TOMORROW I FINISH THEM AND BEGIN THE EARRINGS
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no by all means keep judging cartoon villains solely by if they get redeemed in the end. i know some of us like to talk about other stuff like characterization or entertainment value or nuance as something that makes a good villain. but i think the only thing that actually matters is if the villain ends up on good terms with the protagonist at the end. all the Good TM cartoons with Good TM creators make the villains die a Horrible Death for being Abusers or whatever. and all the Bad TM cartoons with Bad TM creators Forgive Fascists by not making them get publicly executed by the 14 year old protagonist in front of the 8 year old target demographic.
i mean im so glad that more cartoons nowadays are subverting the psyop to support fascists that a few queer artists and queer shows definitely invented in 2017. there are so many popular cartoons doing that. it's almost like there are more properties killing their villains now and in the past than there ever were of properties that didn't do this. and it's almost like whether the villain gets redeemed at the end is more about the context of the story and its themes leading up to a narratively sound decision.
but you know. a few queer shows made by trans ppl were popular and they didn't kill their fascists and even had the gall to make them nuanced while also looking into the harm they did. guess it's trendy to forgive your abusers now because like two cartoons said so. out of like 40 other similarly high profile works that just straight up hit their villains with a bus or smth. by all means. keep heaping praise onto that one show about how they "let their villain just be evil" instead of talking about anything more interesting. that's so subversive, everyone's doing it!
#shut up pandora#check off my 'monthly rant about the treatment of the creators of steven universe and she ra'#this is because of the 'praise' ive been seeing for belos btw#yes i love his panache i love how much he fucks up everything and i love how hes beyond redemption#thats not because he was Born Evil and has always Been Evil???#ppl who show baby belos going out of his way to make calebs life a living hell and evelyn Rescuing this poor blond boy from his Evil Brothe#i am sending so many bad vibes at you rn#he isnt a good villain bc dana terrace decided to be 'subversive' by not redeeming belos#JUST being subversive while writing the story doesnt mean you make a good story being subversive =/= being good#hes a good villain because while his decisions are dogshit we can understand why he made them on an emotional level#and since gravity falls seems to be the golden standard for modern cartoons i guess#bill cipher also isnt a good villain bc hes evil and they killed him#bill is a good villain bc hes entertaining in the threat he poses#what makes a character a good villain is about stuff they do while theyre being a villain#dont just sum it up with 'duhhh they killed them at the end so its good' thats entirely dependent on the story!#anyway this is specifically about modern western cartoon fandoms#if youre telling me to watch shows that arent modern western cartoons or like. read a book then know that i do that already#this stuff isnt as big of a discourse topic in those circles but im talking about this specific circle rn
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NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! THIS ISNT FAAAAIIIRRRR !!!!!!!!!!! LIFE. ISNT. FAAAAAAAAIIIIIRRRRRR !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
These are all so beautiful. Looks like some prototypes that never got past this point.
Sobbing at the only full Milly figure I've ever seen.
#WHYYYYYY BROOOOO !!!!????!!#WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE MEEE DEATH AND DESPAIR FOR BOBO#there are never any actual Knives figures....duhhddouhhDUHHHOUHHHH. He has so much potential for good figures i dont understand its#and this bro...bro dont even eith me roght now#with the PLANTS !??? GRWAAUAGHH !!!! AAAUABHHHH !!!!!! ID GO BROKE IMMEDIATELY ARE YOU FUCJING JOKING#no more prototypes.....make them...NOOOOWWWW !!!!! ill be in debt buying them all if i have to#KNIVES PLANT FIGURE PLAAASEEE BE REAAAAALLLL#im probably going to have dreams about this again Knives figures keep showing up in my dreams#that Milly is so fucking cute too...life isnt fair....#if Knives gets nothing wow Milly gets NOTHING. im so sorry girl i love you 😢💖#also im referencing the bill cipher so sad video....btw....#im not going to be normal about this for awhile#his stupid ass big shoulders omfg death and despair for bobo#if Knives plant fighre inst real than what else am i going to throw at the wall. society these days.
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Bill Cipher's anatomy UPDATE!
Alex Hirsch is going to kill me one day.
So, for those who don't know, I'm the weirdo who did speculative biology of Bill Cipher, mostly as a fun exercise. I'm a biologist after all.
And now, on the stream, Alex Hirsch brought me the unused Bill's anatomy drawing from his book. I lost my mind:
So, now, I can tell you what my spec bio got right and what I got wrong and I can expand on the anatomy a bit!
Btw, this is going to have a NSFW part. I am VERY serious about that. Also, warning for anatomy drawings I guess.
WHAT I GOT CORRECT:
Bill Cipher is an invertebrate! He has a hydroskeleton, which he calls "arm juice", not bones. SUCK ARM JUICE YOU PERSON WHO SENT ME THAT ASK, YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE!
And he's also segmented, although he has more segments than I saw. This isn't unusual, internal structures often keep the segmentation that external structures lost. I was very correct about his exoskeleton splitting in the middle to form a front and back plate and that his limbs protrude through the gap.
His skin is black! It's funny how many people needed to tell me that he's wearing gloves. No he's not!
I accidentally got right that he has a liver. I thought "this dumbass eats and drinks so much shit, if he didn't have a liver he'd be dead by now" and I was right. Considering the size of his liver, I was also right about him being a carnivore (or mostly carnivore). Carnivores have large livers because livers are used to process proteins and for uric acid cycle. Since carnivores consume lots of protein, they need a large liver.
His stomach is in the center! I didn't explain on my previous post why I placed it there, but it actually makes a lot of sense. The center of an equilateral triangle is its "mass center", so if an animal looks like a triangle, it would make a lot of sense that its stomach would be there, so that the extra mass from the meal wouldn't tilt its balance.
I also got right that his intestines are in his lowest segment and his brain in the topmost.
WHAT I GOT WRONG:
The entire reproductive system. It's MUCH freakier than expected!
Bill has ears! They are on the sides of his head. They aren't really ears, just tympanal membranes. They are located where Brett is trying his darndest XD
The hat is probably not a part of Bill's body. He used it as storage for extra organs during Weirdmageddon, Holy Moses on a Motorbike! However, if it IS a part of his body, then it could be used as fat storage.
He has 20 lashes. I would have never guessed. They could still be used to sample scent, a lot of animals have scent sampling tentacles.
His feet! He probably has velcro-like structure on them, like geckos. This could mean that Bill could glue himself to walls and walk on them if he wanted to. Little insect motherfucker.
He has a singular anus! And it's between his legs. Do with that information what you want.
AAAAND UPDATES!
I can finally show you Bill's entire digestive system! I couldn't do that in my original post, since I couldn't figure out what would go after the small intestine. Alex Hirsch has cleared that up for me and also, I think Bill uses some form of Malpighian tubules-like structures for urine excretion.
And, now... The reproductive system. AKA, the fun zone and creative juices.
NSFW!
Bill Cipher is a fucking freak, but maybe that isn't entirely his fault. It's in the genes of Euclydeans as species. (His love for BDSM isn't though. "He's got it all figured out", as Ford said.)
So, in case you don't know what a vagina dentata is, it was like an occult belief that women can grow teeth out of their vaginas. Bill Cipher's genitals look like a fucking vagina dentata. So that's why he thinks that teeth are hot - they grow out of his reproductive system.
Now, those aren't really teeth. They look like sharp-edged fleshy protrusions that Euclydeans probably use to tighten the grip during mating. It could probably be used for stimulation as well. That's why Bill doesn't like his sides being touched - the genitals are inside, but rubbing them feels violating.
Euclydeans are most likely one of those species who use pain to sexually stimulate their partners. It's not that uncommon on Earth either (don't look up reptile hemipenes, especially not turtles) and for creatures that are covered in smooth exoskeleton, some piercing action would be highly beneficial for transferring seminal fluid.
This also gives us the option of Bill Cipher being a biological female, who has a vagina with those weird teeth-like protrusions. However, it is entirely possible that males also have similar genitals. Bill calls his thing that's dripping "creative juice", so maybe it is seminal fluid? In either case, it's very freaky, but it fits him so well.
This also means that male Euclydeans most likely don't have a real copulatory organ, or, maybe, they do, but the female has to "bite it off" during mating to absorb the sperm. If they don't have the copulatory organ, they do it like birds, with just pumping, but unlike birds, they hold onto each other's thing with flesh teeth.
I am going to hell for making this art, but you are going with me for seeing it:
It also occurred to me that, since I believe Euclydeans use their bricks to produce sound... they would probably be loud. Fanfic authors, you know what to do.
@mitsu-the-witch you requested this, now live with it. I am going to burn my degree.
#i am going to hell and dragging all of you with me#speculative biology#bill cipher#the book of bill#stanford pines#gravity falls#billford#fan art#what biology studies do to a mf#kids get biology majors if you want to write smut fanfics with weird aliens#long post
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came to the fucked up realization after finishing gravity falls again last night the parallels of the dream bubble bill made for mabel and the literal state of delusion he keeps himself in.
in the book of bill on the page where bill cipher describes how he figured out a way to manipulate her into giving him the rift, it says:
"Summers ending, my guy. Ending to death, bro. She'd do anything to make it last just a day longer. Probably something RASH and OUT OF CHARACTER, even!"
as we know, mabel cannot handle the fact that she will be growing up. that the relationship with her brother is going to change. she is scared of high school.
bill then says "That was it. She'd never make a deal with me. But she'd make a deal with someone she believed could give her more time. The dream was done. I had her."
bill then creates the dream bubble for mabel, he makes every one of her dreams come true, a place where time is still and she can be a kid forever. a lie so great that she wont have to face the truth.
in journal 3 on one of the pages bill is writing in code, we see this:
[ID: "I ask you, why must[should] time only move forward? Why must cause preceded effect. Who voted on the law of physics."]
my friend helped me break down what bill means by this:
why can we only move forward in the 4th dimension of time. why does something have to make another thing happen, why must cause come before the effect. why cant you move backwards, in the other direction, change the decisions youve made.
how interpret this is bill asking why he is not able to back and stop what he did to his family. he says to ford that he tried and failed to undo the past.** why did him wanting people to acknowledge his advantages instead of suppress him lead to the destruction of his whole dimension?
**(i just want to point out that this is probably the time where bill is the MOST open to anybody, or at least the first. to his henchmaniacs he had been telling them that he liberated his dimension until the oracle discovered the truth. here, to ford, he got so much closer to telling the truth. he SHOWS ford the last atoms of his world. he says that it was destroyed by a monster, not that it was liberated! destroyed)
back to when bill says "I had her" about mabel, he had her cause he knew exactly what needed to happen to trap mabel in a delusion because it is exactly what he is doing to himself. creating a fake narrative of what happened to him, that he was vindicated in killing his whole dimension. only ever doing exactly what he wants because confronting the truth is too scary for him(good fucking lord). the morality page offers good insight into this too.
i am actually just going to quote the whole page and highlight the important part. it speaks for itself really
"THE POINT IS it's[morality] is a very flexible concept! But parents and presidents don't want you to know that, because then you might start asking other questions, like who put them in charge, anyway? So they cram your brain full of guilt and regrets for transgressing the laws that they just made up(the laws that they made to prevent the destruction of their dimension, regardless of if the law + the wrongful medication of a fucking baby triangle did any good to actually prevent it). Wouldn't it be nice if you could put all that baggage down? Quell the shame that follows you everywhere for a lifetime of crimes? MAKE THE SCREAMS FINALLY STOP? The good news is you CAN silence that annoying voice, and here's how!
DENIAL
Works 100% of the time in every situation. What you you mean there are people who disagree? I can confidently say there aren't!
RATIONALIZATION
If you can do it, you can justify it! "Truth" is open-source code and anyone can edit it anytime! Want to be like me? List 3 "evil" things and then 3 "reasons why they're actually good." You'll be rationalizing like Bill in no time!
DETACHMENT
Did you know 100% of your human cells die and are replaced every 7 years? That means that anything you did 7 years ago wasn't even you-it was some dead loser! You can't be held accountable for what a dead person did! What? You think this is just another form of rationalization? I DENY THAT!
THE BILL CIPHER DECISION METHOD!
Working over the eons, the voices in my head teamed up and worked out a foolproof method for making any decision in any situation.
DO WHATEVER I WANT."
ooooooooooooooooooh boy.
he is fully admitting here that he is living in a completely different really in order to justify doing whatever he wants. he gives mabel the tools to deny, to rationalize, to detach herself from the reality of it all. that time has to move forward. and he thinks it will work because it worked on himself.
but it doesn't work on mabel because she understands that she needs other people. shes vunerable, she lets people in, admits when shes wrong. and bill cant do that because it would destroy the fantasy he's created for himself.
#gravity falls#gravity falls theory#gravity falls analysis#book of bill#the book of bill#tbob#thisisnotawebsitedotcom#bill cipher#mabel pines#marlstext
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Billford fic recs!
I was asked a while ago (i believe by @kerink ?) when I shared a list of the currently active fics I was reading if I could do a broader rec list as well, so here it is! not a ton of oneshots since I didn't try to keep good track of fics until very recently. will likely update this over time!
there is ONE non-triangle bill in here, but what he is in that one is vague so maybe he could still be the triangle. schrodingers triangle.
Collections:
Valentines 3K challenge (all explicit)
you know it. you love it. if you haven't read all of them though, you're missing the fuck out
Stan Bros Coffee (G and explicit)
the espresso-Bill AU! there's a bunch of little fics about it and they're all in here!
Oneshots: (most oneshot recs are in the collections)
Eternal Devotion - Illusions of the Heart (explicit)
have you ever read a horror story posing as a love story? are you interested in the most unhinged yet cohesive internal monologue ever crafted? do you wonder why keyhole suddenly became so prominent in the fandom out of nowhere? all of these and more await you in here. click the link-- i am a normal fanfic
touch and go (teen)
it's portal ford, baby! great exploration of what prolonged isolation does to people and has excellent bill being sweeties
Haha He Fucked That...Spider? (explicit)
again, portal ford! he's the master of getting himself in stupid situations, and bill is the master of getting him out of them in the ways ford appreciates the least
Longfics:
Theseus' Guide To Ruining A Perfectly Good Boat (mature) (complete in my heart bc i know what happens)
why are you still following me if you haven't read this yet. y'all know what this is
Then it becomes, it becomes, it becomes a problem (mature) (complete)
how bad do things have to get before bill finally chooses to cut his shit out? the answer may surprise you! during-betrayal fic where bill makes the ingenious decision to bring a third party into the mix as if that would solve anything. breathtaking prose, magnificent character work, and the best fucking bill cipher writing and analysis there is! SO funny, SO raw and emotional. Jan deserves to ascend to godhood at the cost of all of her family and friends. as a treat.
Property of Bill Cipher (explicit) (good as complete)
pre-portal character exploration. the only fic i think ive ever seen that dares to say bill was doing extremely fucked up shit with ford the entire time before things went bad between them, it's just that after the betrayal, ford viewed it all in a different light. handles bill's obsession with the guy so nicely, does not shy away from the scary and unnerving in just the way i love it! it's incomplete, but the story is really just a series of vignettes leading up to and a little after the betrayal, so we all know how this is all going to end anyways. this one is formative billford for me
Creative Solution (unrated, but i'd call it mature) (complete)
what if bill erased ford's memories of the betrayal and weirdmageddon happened? touches on what it's like to be in a relationship where you're both deeply mentally ill and insecure in a way that really, truly hits me. absolute masterwork of digging through bill's fucked up psyche and the ways in which he Can and Will spiral forever
Multiversal Manhunt Moved to Your Backyard (explicit, but only the final chapter) (complete)
set during weirdmageddon, bill and ford make a deal to play a game of sexy scary hide and seek. it's so fun to root for the villain. this author has an amazing grasp on the character voices and tone, this is SUCH a delightful read and despite knowing exactly how it's gonna end, the tension still keeps you at the edge of your seat!
On the Level (mature) (incomplete)
marine biology AU where ford is a researcher on a deep sea base and bill is some sort of eldritch horror at the bottom of the sea. writing is lovely and it's really got the slow, ominous horror vibe down pat. it's tagged for Alien(1979) references so i'm personally waiting for bill to violently murder all of these people <3 also this is the non-triangle fic i was referring to
Take A Chance (explicit) (incomplete)
handyman bill thats very focused on how poorly bill and ford are able to communicate with each other, and boy, theyre bad at it. lots of cute family shenanigans and overall a very lighthearted read!
Impossible Geometries and Biologies (explicit) (incomplete)
the only pregnant bill fic i'll ever read because its carried by so much fun speculative biology. really has you nodding along like okay, okay even if i might not agree, i can see what you're cooking. my continued interest hinges heavily on whether or not they choose to kill bill off but i imagine we won't know if that happens for at least 2 more chapters
#m.txt#gravity falls#billford#oh cos and untitled fic if only you were completed you could be posted and have the highest honor of all... being here.. on my shitty list.#fic recs#i really need to go on a deep dive through the tags and dig out more stuff because surely theres some hidden gold somewhere#but its much easier to watch whatevers actively updating on account of. well. its not buried#the experience of making this list and going through stuff and seeing that all the best ones are complete though... wretched.#new long fics... save me new long fics...#edit: i dont know why some of these have header text and others dont#i didnt do that asadjkghalg
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It's just a game, right? Pt 1
Masterpost
"I just don't see how sitting around is gonna do anything!" Dash argues, face to face with Sam.
"Well, if you have other ideas you're more than welcome to offer them, but we can't just take out the giw. They have more manpower than us, more equipment, and the new agents actually seem to be competent in fights! And we are a bunch of high school students!"
They are all, ostensibly in English Class right now, but even Mr. lancer has forgone the illusion of normal classwork. He assigns books and hands out reading assignments every week, but nobody really cares whether they get turned in or not. The city, after all, has a much bigger problem.
"I don't know! But sitting here-"
"He's not entirely wrong, the longer we wait the more likely they figure it out, just like we all did." As Valerie finishes speaking, the room temperature drops noticeably, and the kids all glance nervously over at Danny who's head hasn't moved from it's spot on his desk. He almost seems dead with how still he is. Beside him Tucker stares at his PDA, the only one who hasn't reacted to the temperature change.
"Should I even ask what you're messing with?" Sam asks, walking over while the others stare nervously at Danny.
"Actually, yeah." Tucker easily shifts so they can both see the webpage displayed on the handmade tech. "I got something through."
"I thought getting stuff through wasn't really the problem?"
"I mean, yeah, they're letting Everything Is Normal posts through, but this wasn't. That. I was, um, kind of fucking around with ciphers and shit? Not saying anything relevant, but just seeing whether they'd flag any old weird shit, you know? And um. I got a video out."
"Okay, but how does that help us?" Valerie asks.
"It helps because if they let a cipher through then means if I encode shit well enough, then it'll also get through."
"But if it's, like, that hard to figure out what it says, then won't it be useless on the outside?"
"The chances of it getting into the hands of someone who could crack it do seem, uh, improbable."
"Not if we stack the deck."
"Wes-"
"No, listen, I know you're all still mad at me, but like. If you can attract a community of codebreakers? Then eventually someone will crack the code on what you need them to!"
"If you have an idea then just fucking say it, Wes," Sam snaps.
"Make an ARG. We can even have like, the base level be completely United to anything real, just make up a story about, i dunno, space travel? And then bury the actual info beneath that. Eventually somebody will crack into the real stuff, and if it's popular enough by then, and the GIW tries to suppress it? That'll be even more suspicious-looking, and just make them dig harder."
"What the fuck is a ARG?" Dash asks, pulling his gaze away from their definitely-just-sleeping classmate.
"Augmented reality game. It's like an unfiction thing. Make a story but the story is interactive and people have to decode shit to figure out what's going on." Tucker glances over to Wes. "And actually not a bad idea. If we all work together, we could probably make something cool."
"You could treat it as a class-wide project." Mr. Lancer says, making everyone jump. "That way I can back you up if anyone starts asking questions."
"Make it about black holes," Danny says, finally pulling himself up from his desk. "We can base it in wormhole theory, and distract the GIW with all the theoretical science."
"What, so like we make videos that seem like they're being sent through a black hole?"
"Fuckin. Sure, why not? As if shit couldn't get any weirder around here."
"Star, please try to refrain from swearing in front of me. I know the situation is - difficult - but I am officially still your teacher."
"Sorry, Lancer."
#im trying the thing where you write very rough drafts for tumblr and then edit it for ao3....#dpxdc#next up: bernard drags tim into the hottest new internet mystery!#the one where the amity parkers make an arg
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Gaaaah ok now I've had time to process and I can finally write out my thoughts on 3.3 so SPOILER WARNING OF COURSE DONT READ UNLESS YOUVE PLAYED IT OR WANT SPOILERS IG
-i gah I didn't think I'd love cipher and hyacine this much but g a h they fr are making me love and lose e v e r y fucking chrysos heir huh 💀💀
- cipher pulling off the grand lie is s u c h a good way to take her character to me I spent the whole time last patch being like "ok she's like pretty useful but like what role does she play in the grand scheme of things" and o u g h i was not disappointed as soon as they mentioned 300 years of light from the daylight device I was like "wait a fucking second" and gah it's such a cool way to use her power for the greater good
-aglaea aglaea aglaea g o d at the beginning of the amphoreus quests I was 50/50 on her but after these few missions gosh I cried when she died and her and ciphers relationship gah
-i cried so many times this update I cried at every death I cried for the whole half hour after it was great and horrifying and gah they're all gone 😭😭 and I am so torn up about it
- phainon??? Gah oh my g o d ok after 3.2 when he gave the speech I was like wow this is like a different guy and i knew it was because he was upset at everything happening but especially after aglaeas passing him having to take up the role of the leader of the chrysos heirs and essentially the whole city which is essentially all of the people in all of amphoreus, he is grieving and upset and hurting so s o badly and trying to keep it together and I think that his writing being so different this patch really reflected that. I understand people not liking it because he seems like a different character than he was and that's because he essentially I s now with everything he's gone/going through. Originally when his drip art came out I went "this seems so out of character but I like it because I know that he puts on a facade all of the time anyways" and after this patch I'm like "oh this is t h i s phainon" this is hurt grieving angry still protecting everyone and holding it together phainon and it just gah it hurts my heart so much
-phaidei (bc what am I if not a fan of yaoi) oh my God "did you forget about me?" "it's a date, mydeimos" the fact that they promised to see each other again instead of saying goodbye just breaks my heart especially when mydei dies and phainon doesn't even know right now and it is killing me from the inside out 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
-ohhhjh the scepter????? Gah the scepter!!! As soon as herta said "a fourth one" I was like "no fucking way they're bringing back the scepters" AND THEY ARE!!!! GAH but also that plus Lord ravager explains all of the chaos and turmoil and the scepter also explains all of the technology that amphoreus has that seems so out of place to me!!! But like I get it now!!! It makes sense!!! I am just worried that it's going to wind up being a "the people of amphoreus aren't real and are all a simulation" but like haha surely that won't happen (I don't know)
-the two amphoreus theories!!! I am really hoping this is true and so we can see all the pookies again but also like I want o u r pookies I want the ones that are dead to not be dead adjfksjdj I don't want other pookies that are but aren't them 🥺🥺 but like I think it's a very good theory and especially with the fact that there's a scepter in amphoreus it can definitely happen.
-ok quick note Abt the 2 amphoreus theories STOP SAYING ITS LIKE 2 SIDES OF A MOBIUS STRIP BECAUSE A MOBIUS STRIP ONLY HAS ONE FUCKING SIDE THATS THE WHOLE POINT ok thank you :)
3.4 LEAKS SPOILERS AHEAD
- oh my God phainon looks so good and also so ough I'm terrified but I love it but I hate that everyone's gone
-thw design??? The longer hair and golden eyes??? Dare I say he looks like mydei (good Lord) and I also want to point out the white and gold color scheme that makes him look like aglaea too which ough 😭😭 he's truly taking over the leadership role but also no one else who is a chrysos heir is even there to lead anymore 😭😭😭
-the moveset looks insane and I saw something where he has a bunch of actions in quick succession?? But like there was a countdown and stuff and like gah
-anyways I am glad I have been saving since drip art release because good fucking God I need him to be on my account
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OKAY SO this one has been cooking in my noggin for a while. you’re dating ford and he lets bill possess him but bill fucking hates you and wants to destroy everything about the relationship so he makes ford do some noncon to you if ykwim 👀💦
RICYTP_O)(+*_&)*Y&T THIS IS SO HNNGGG
tw // noncon, somno, implied billford, bill cipher sucks, ford pines fluff at the beginning thoo
bill most defintely did not get the appeal about you. ford is sooo obsessed with you and he loves egging his bad behavior on, but at the same time, he didn't get why ford likes you so much.
you giggle, sitting on ford's lap, watching him journal his findings. "why write that in invisible ink? it seems pretty important."
he kisses your shoulder, "to keep important information out of the wrong hands." you hum in understanding. the two of you sit in silence, letting your hearts beat together.
"i don't get it." you had just left and bill had decided that it was the right time to question ford.
ford continued working as bill sat on his shoulder, "get what."
"them! your little," he waves his hands. "toy? plaything?"
"partner." ford interjects, annoyed. "they're my partner. i don't take kindly to anyone calling (y/n) names."
bill raises his hands in mock surrender, "fine. fine. i just don't see what you see, sixer." he shrugs.
"(y/n) is.... someone who understands me. they're patient, kind, open, and loyal to a fault." he laughs a little to himself and bill frowns, feeling a surge of jealousy. ford's voice was full of love, every word he speaks of you felt honest and true.
"whatever you say, fordsy. a warm hole is a warm hole" bill shrugs and disappears before ford can retort.
ford is gonna spend all night thinking of ways to convince bill about you and urethra🤓! he's got it!!
"would you like to meet them?" ford moves his queen, looking up to see bill's eye wide in surprise.
"you sure you want to introduce me to your "partner", my muse?" bill mocks, but ford only smiles, continuing the chess match. silence fills the room, but bill's interest in you won, "how would we do this?"
they'll decide to let bill posses ford and meet you, not tell you about bill of course. ford didn't want you to freak out and leave him and bill was happy to play along with ford's lies.
repetitive knocks wake you up from your sleep. you look over to your alarm clock, blearily reading 1:22 AM. "what the hell." you mumble, rubbing your eyes. the knocks don't stop and you're forced out of bed. you look through the peephole and see a very familiar face.
"gooooood morning, cutie!" his voice was loud, echoing through the empty street. you shush him and pull him inside.
"stanford, it's 2 in the morning. what're you doing here." you fight a yawn, trying to sound stern.
"baby, come on, is it a crime to want to see my angel?" he takes a seat at your dining table, looking around your home like it's brand new.
you raise an eyebrow at the new nicknames, "are you okay? you're acting... weird." ford grins, abnormally.
"i think you're just tired." he waves off your concern, "let me stay over, baby. we'll have some fun." his grin stretches across his face, unnaturally. he stalks towards you and you slowly back away.
"ford, i think you should go." your voice wavers as you point to the door.
"noooo, i don't think so." his arm snaps out, grabbing you by the throat. you choke, digging your nails into his hand, "this is the thing sixer was impressed by? you?!?" he laughs, loud and manic. "a weak, useless, human." he spits, anger coursing through bill's mind.
hes soooo sillyyy. you're gonna end up passing out from the lack of airrr and then his original goal was to kill you, but... i mean a warm hole is a warm hole.
you could feel yourself getting stretched, legs held above and pressed against your chest. you hear a familar voice grunting above you. "h-hurts..." you moan, eyes slowly opening. ford's wide smile comes into view.
"sixer was right, you're realll open." he grinds against you. you feel tears stream down your face. he grins, bending over and dragging his tongue up your face. he licked up your tears, giggling. "you'll never forget this face ever again."
afterwards, you're laying there unconscious and bill's like.... damn.... you're kinda fun :))) he gets ford now
#fun fact: i am watching bijuu mike's playthrough of class of 09 the flip side as im writing this.... its ass i fear#i was gonna add more but i decided not to sawry#minors dni#yandere#yandere x reader#yandere x you#ford pines x reader#bill cipher x reader#implied billford#tw noncon#tw somno
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Hey, thanks for calling my blog "otherwise good content" when most of my stuff is focused on Ford Pines. Seems kinda like a backhanded compliment, but maybe you're just rude IRL. I'm an understanding person.
Anyway, who are you to decide what is and isn't cute? I, personally, think Ford Pines is ADORABLE! I mean, look at him!!! Someone sent me this picture of him with his head stuck in a trash can! TELL ME that isn't some America's Funniest Home Videos (pet category) shit.
Also, apparently, the other guy in the picture punched the person who took the photo? IDK who he is, but he looks like Ford, so maybe Cipher made a clone? Clone's less cute, though. Explain that with your fucking rating system

Hi,
Okay, I'm going to clear a few things up for my followers.
First of all: I really don't want to come off as passive aggressive. That's not what I'm about, and as far as I'm concerned, it doesn't help anyone to be anything but completely up front when you're on the internet.
I'm sorry if my comment seemed backhanded. I started following Jellyskink back when she mostly posted OC character designs, when I was in a hardcore comics and graphic design phase. I haven't kept up with the blog regularly since. I am truly sorry for misrepresenting you here. (I really, truly am a fan of your work.)
With that said, I am not going to be passive aggressive about this. I'm being explicit: THE FORD PINES REPOSTS ARE NOT OKAY. How do I even begin to explain that you're reposting videos of a grown human man being treated as a pet, and not even well?
I rate content based on whether the pets in them are actually displaying "cute" behavior (playful, friendly, well-trained, healthy) or if they're showing signs of distress and mistreatment. That's my rating system. The fact that people want me to "rate" an adult human man when it is, again, against interdimensional law to treat sophonts as pets/livestock and humans are a sophont species, is already kind of weird.
But, hey. I'm willing to play along. I'm a good sport. If they're pet videos, I'll check to make sure that the pet isn't showing signs of distress or abuse!
Except he definitely is.
Jellyskink, let's just give you the benefit of the doubt and assume that you're just really bad at reading the room. I'm telling you now: Ford Pines is in obvious distress in practically all of these video clips. I don't think you care. I think you're a Cipher Loyalist and thinks the dorito can just treat Ford however he wants because he's a god. But if you're not, prove it: stop posting exploitative Ford Pines videos. They aren't even your flapping videos, you're reposting them. Go back to making cheesy OC Do Not Steal art. That contributed to the world.
Now, about the picture, since you asked:
RATING: NOT CUTE.
This is a guy who got assaulted with a trash can!! Even if this wasn't a human I'd be rating this not cute! It's horrible! And you know what else makes it not cute? You know how I always give things a bad rating when the handler or the person taking the video isn't being safe with it? Well, the guy taking the picture is 100% about to get assaulted. You know why?
THAT IS STANLEY PINES. Is he Ford's clone? I don't know - how do you count identical twins? Cipher didn't make him, they're brothers. You can literally look it up. How are you a so-called Ford Pines fan and you don't even know who Stanley Pines is? He's the sole proprietor of the anomaly distributor Pines Profundities. It's public record. He's in the New York business registry.
So, yeah. The guy taking the picture of a grown man stuck in a garbage can was being pretty stupid and is about to get punched by the man's brother, because that's what happens when you're a jerk to random strangers in New York.
#Ford Pines is a Human#asks#IU!Jellyskink#cipher loyalists#Trying not to get mad about this#Asker's probably literally an edgy teenager#Just get into MCR like the rest of us and get out of the freaking cipher cult#It's not going to get you a girlfriend#OOC: In-Universe Jellyskink will be tagged separately from OOC!Jellyskink!
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So like, hear me out, bill can get drunk from like alcohol, (or something weird inter dimensional drink) but either way he can get drunk like a human. Does that also mean he can get sick? Can you make a bill x reader where reader is taking care of Bill while he's sick and it's basically just:
reader: lie the fuck down man, your sick as shit
Bill: NO, I DON'T *NEED* REST, I'M AN ALL SEEING GOD WITH INFINITE POW- *fucking passes out*
‘Bill please go back to bed.’ You groaned for what felt like the tenth time that day when you saw the floating silhouette of the triangular demon from the doorway
‘No! I’m not like you flesh bags! I don’t get sick!’ He says as he then proceeds to cough an abnormal amount, to say that Bill’s coughing fit sounded like the pits of hell opening up was an understatement, you still remembered that he sent someone insane when they accidentally saw his endoskeleton when he was eating. Even the thought of that made you uneasy and a little queasy.
‘Well what would you call that?’ You replied sarcastically as you moved to look at him, unimpressed when you saw he had draped himself with the blanket you gave him like he was fighting off the cold within him, and wearing blue striped pyjamas all the while his eye/mouth was half lidded and almost lifeless looking. In that moment Bill cipher didn’t look like the all knowing and powerful demon, but instead a sick little puppy that was too stubborn to listen to commands from someone else.
‘Realising the demons.’ Bill snarled, he moved to look at what you were doing that was so important that it made you leave the bed so early. ‘What’re you doing, aren’t you supposed to be serving me like you flesh bags should?’ He then asked as he floated to your side to stare down at the pot of soup as though it had insulted him. ‘I’m making you soup for your sick little self your ungrateful shit.’ You said as you gently pushed him aside so that you could make sure that you weren’t burning the soup by overindulging him with your attention.
‘Has it got deer teeth in it?’ Bill then asks, his voice was rough from all the coughing and he looked at though he winced with every words, and without hesitation you offered him a soothing cherry cough sweet, and for once Bill didn’t fight you on this and popped it into his eye/mouth, letting you knew it was indeed bad if the dream demon wasn’t putting much of a fight about being treated as though he was weaker.
‘Unfortunately no it does not have deer teeth in it, besides I don’t know what the boiling point of deer teeth would be, if they had one.’ You tell him as you began to ladle some of the soup into a small bowl. But before you could blink, bill snapped his fingers and soon enough there was a layer of small, half melted deer teeth on top of his soup. You looked over at him just to see him shrug beneath the blanket you gave him.
‘Deer teeth makes everything better, you flesh bags are so far behind on the times.’ Bill said condescendingly as he made some deer teeth appear in his small hands but before he could eat one of them, you were quick to snatch them away from him as he cried out in surprise. ‘Give them back!’
‘Not until you eat your soup and go back to bed.’ You told him sternly as you held the packet of deer teeth away from the whiney sick dream demon that was currently pressing himself up against the side of your face.
‘Which one do you want me to do? Bed or soup, you humans are so unnecessarily confusing.’ Bill whines again but this time he couldn’t find the strength to keep himself floating as soon he was resting in the crook of your arm, fighting back the need for sleep out of a necessity to prove that he was above such a thing as illness, but found himself snuggling up to your warmth more so then ever. ‘I am the almighty bill cipher and I will not..not let this…illness get the better of the dream demon.’ He murmurs to himself and you couldn’t help but smile at how cute he could be when he’s not making your life a living hell.
‘Sure you are, now let’s get you to bed your stubbornness.’ You said as you carried bill in one arm and his deer teeth laced soup in the other after you finished up ladling his soup and putting the pot in the sink to wash at a later date, before making your way back up to your room as Bill murmurs threats as he looks up at you with a half hearted glare.
‘I could end you weakling, I really could so I wouldn’t try me.’ He would say but with his sore voice, blanketed form, and striped pyjamas, you couldn’t help but feel as though you were being intimidated by a sick puppy.
‘I know you can.’ You replied.
‘Don’t mock me.’ Bill whines once more as he threw a weak punch to your bicep with his small hand. ‘I am not needing anyone to look after me, I can do it by myself.’ He adds as though flaunting his hyper independence.
‘I’m not mocking you, I’m helping you and secondly that didn’t even hurt, and thirdly what do you normally do when get sick?’ You asked as when you arrived to your room you placed bill down on the bed, setting the soup aside on the bedside table as you tucked bill tightly beneath the covers. The triangle demon shrugs as he feels his mind becomes foggy with the need to sleep, he hasn’t felt this weak in a long, long time and now here he was being pampered and looked after by someone he deems weaker by comparison; He hates it but there wasn’t much energy left in him to do anything other than sleep.
‘Nothing because I’m not of a weakling species like you.’ He replied and you scoffed.
‘Sounds about right, anyways go to sleep and you can have your cold ass deer teeth soup when you wake up.’ You told him as you stood up to leave the room, only to feel a little hand grab ahold of your shirt but as you looked at him to say something, bill was already asleep but his grip on your shirt was tight. So you sat yourself down on the chair by the bed, trying to make yourself feel comfortable before falling asleep yourself, knowing the this scenario will repeat until the bastard felt better again.
So until then, you could rest without having the worry that a floating Dorito chip wasn’t going to faint on you anytime soon.
#gravity falls x reader#gravity falls imagine#gravity falls imagines#gravity falls#bill cipher x you#bill cipher imagine#bill cipher imagines#bill cipher x reader
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Do you ship it?

you can also vote for them in the old man yaoi poll if you want to make the sweep even worse. reason under the cut!
monsterfucking… old man yaoi… worship… divorce… hatred… tragedy… angst… and, above all, Mathematics.
Their dynamic is so fucked up and poisonous and i am drinking it up with a silly straw. Always thinking about them. It’s one-sided attraction that switches sides too late. It haunts the plot of the whole show. It is so messed up in a somehow realistic way, and yet so fantastical. Do you think Icarus was in love with the sun. What if you gave everything to someone only to find you were nothing to them, could a god love a mere tool, a plaything. What is left when a worshipper’s devotion is broken by hatred. Realizing that you needed someone only after the relationship is shattered beyond repair because of your own actions.
Do you understand what I am saying.
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Stanford pines is Aro/Ace to me.
That being said, do I ship Billford? Yes. Yes I do.
But it is imperative to me that you all know I ship it for the sole purpose that Ford having Fucked A Triangle (for science of course) is the funniest fucking thing in every single universe to me. No human form; just regular Bill. He made out sloppy style with that toxic polygon. That when he dumped him, Bill Cipher was in the throws of grief and was an inconsolable mess for the rest of his existence.
I ship Billford because a nerd who doesnt shower and burns his facial hair off instead of shaving not knowing he was dating and a interdimenstional chaos demon made up of only three sides with some serious problems and is flatter than a piece of paper has be cackling evilly like a wizard perfecting a necromancy spell for his evil dungeon.
Stan unable to decide if he’s horrified, disgusted, disappointed, or unsurprised (somewhere in the middle of all of them, because he always said Ford was more interested in geometry than a girlfriend)
Dipper making the realization hearing the way Ford and Bill speak about each other respectively and being unable to look at the journals (or any of the triangles in the windows) the same ever again
Fiddleford on his hands and knees at the fact that a TRIANGLE is more successful at rizzing up Stanford Filbrick Pines than he is in his perspective (he hasn’t come to the realization that Ford is acearo because he’s too busy having a horrendous gay panic)
The Henchmaniacs watching Bill sobbing and howling in grief like his entire world ended (drama queen) and having to distract him any time they see anything related to the number six (stop signs are always a pain because it leads to him being inconsolable for a minimum of two hours)
The fact that BILL is the pathetic clingy ex. The idea that Ford didn’t even consider the possibility of Bill being romantic because thats just how Bill is, right? Right? What do you MEAN I’m getting special treatment? What’s the significance he would have killed anyone else but he turned me into a gold statue? Isn’t it just because I am Smart?
Ford my beloved, clueless Ace.
But yeah. Billford. I love it. It’s the worst best funniest shit this side of the multiverse. Also this is coming from an Ace Demiromantic just so you guys know
#billford#bill gravity falls#ford pines#gravity falls stanford#stanford pines#bill cipher#the book of bill#gravity falls
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I feel like historically, in the same way Bill uses he/him pronouns to exploit the patriarchy and denote power, having lots of human women indicates fame, riches, abundance, status. Like. He wants people to see him as a Chad, and Chads obtain women. What's better than being a playboy who gets all the girls? Getting the girls via RULE OF LAW. Does a dumb meathead human Chad have this many wives? I don't fucking THINK so. So Chad can not even SPEAK to him, do you see how many women he's collected in his hoard? It's objectifying sure, but he objectifies and uses all humans, big whoop. Women are what's "in" around here, and he's hip to the trends
I have trouble buying that Bill "It's Gonna Get Weird" Cipher, who taught a townful of Puritan women how to be witches and violently overthrow the patriarchy just because those oppressive Puritan men irritated him so much, would go, "I know how I'm gonna impress these humans! By ✨conforming to their traditional social norms✨!"
Especially since, immediately after marrying everyone's wives, he sets up a cult dedicated to a new god right on the border of the Bible belt (why not pretend he, the All-Seeing Eye, is actually the Christian god they've already been worshiping and co-opt the local religion?), and reads geometry erotica live on the radio in a deeply conservative rural area.
Like, before TBOB, I might could've bought "Bill's pretending to be heterosexual for the street cred." But post-TBOB it's pretty evident that his modus operandi isn't "impress humans by pretending I'm what they idealize," it's "impress humans by convincing them what I am is what they should idealize." He doesn't appropriate local cultural beliefs, he violently hands out new beliefs and tells humans to get with his program—and they do.
For goodness sake, he goes through the 50s starting multiple flop bands before it dawns on him that maybe humans might like music that's "good." Even at his most desperate—eternally trapped in a forensic psych hospital pleading through a book to some random reader to help free him—he tells the reader some self-aggrandizing story about his childhood and says he's not gonna give them a story that "makes his sharp edges easier to swallow." If he won't even deign to make himself palatable then, of all times, then why in Orchard Lake?
I don't think he'd ask for wives because he thinks the humans expect it; I think he asked for wives because he wanted it.
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