#and I get it based on the series so far & my best guess (no spoilers please) plus just basic character arcs

[acourtofquestions]

Currently reading the Assassin and the Underworld so slowly because I love Sam Cortland so much & I know how this book ends😭

… I just want to enjoy them falling in love (just a little longer) before I can inevitably never re-read it the same or unread his death (which is going to rip me to pieces)😅🖤💀

[narumi-gens]

Between Dreams and Reality

Gojo Satoru x gn!Reader

summary: The space between dreams and reality is a curse. Loving Gojo Satoru makes it the greatest curse of all.

warnings: minors/ageless/blank blogs dni, massive jjk manga spoilers, chapter 236 spoilers, angst with no happy ending, sad times guys, established relationship, gojo being his usual obnoxious self and making everything about him

notes: I'm just working through jjk 236 like the rest of you! also the title comes from something kenjaku says in the manga and it was used in the vol. 23 promo video and I loved it so much that I've been wanting to work into something so here we are.

words: 2.5k

“Hey, remember that fight we had?” Gojo asks from behind you in bed. The question pulls you from the edge of sleep, but just barely.

“Be more specific,” you grumble, too tired to even snort in response. All you can do is nuzzle further into your pillow. 

“It was about you getting remarried,” he says.

“That was a tantrum, not a fight,” you correct. “And I told you not to say re-married. We’re not married now.”

Even with your eyes closed and your back turned to him, you can feel how amused he is by your response. 

“I was kind of a dick about it, wasn’t I?” he reflects aloud into the darkness of your shared bedroom.

It’s such an unexpected moment of introspection from him — a man who doesn’t seem to know what introspection is — that even in your drowsy state, you let out a small laugh.

“When aren’t you?” you ask him through a yawn and he lets out an offended noise that tugs the corners of your lips into a sleepy smile. 

“Well, sorry I was such an asshole,” he sighs, a faint note of uncharacteristic sincerity coloring his words.

“Gojo Satoru apologizing? I must be dreaming…” you mumble.

“Oh, my aunt’s getting remarried,” you say as you read through the series of messages that your mother sent you. 

“Didn’t your uncle just die?” Gojo kindly asks. Thankfully, you’re more than used to his inability to display any form of tact.

“Well, it’s been a year. But everyone heals differently. I guess when the time is right, the time is right,” you muse. You glance over at him where he sits next to you on the couch and are surprised by the thoughtful look on his annoyingly handsome face.

You turn back to your phone, where your mother seems to be having a very similar reaction to Gojo based on her messages — especially the ones that say, “It’s too soon!”, of which there are many. 

You’ve never been all that close with your mother’s side of the family so your aunt’s decision to remarry isn’t something you have a strong opinion on one way or the other. If she’s found someone else, you wish her the best.

“How long would you wait to get remarried if I died?” Gojo suddenly asks and you scoff without looking up at him.

“To get remarried, I’d have to have been married previously, Mr. Marriage-Is-Just-A-Construct.” The words would probably sound harsh if they were coming from someone else. You speak them dryly and with clear disinterest.

“Fine. How long would you wait to get married to someone else if I died?” he rephrases his original question and you shrug, your attention focused on trying to calm your mother down.

“I don’t know. Two years?” 

“Two?!” he screeches so loudly that you flinch away from him on the couch and slap a hand over your ear. He sits up and turns to face you fully, even going so far as to slide his glasses down his nose so that he can focus the full weight of his Six Eyes on you. “That’s not even enough time for my body to get cold!”

“Can you calm down? It’s just a hypothetical,” you tell him with a roll of your eyes. You reach a hand out to push his glasses back up only for him to bat it away before you can even come into contact with his Infinity. 

“Two years!” he repeats in outrage. “There should be at least five- no, ten years of solid mourning. And I mean the whole thing. You better only dress in black and I expect weekly visits to my grave with flowers and incense. And make sure you put my portrait in the butsudan—”

“We don’t have a butsudan now,” you cut him off to point out, gesturing a wild hand out towards the rest of your shrine-free apartment. “I’m not gonna go out and buy one just because you were stupid enough to get yourself killed.”

“And definitely no dating!” he shouts over you before he brings a thoughtful finger to his chin. “In fact, you should just be like one of those widows who throw themselves on their husband’s funeral pyre. Yeah, that’d work.”

He nods to himself, seemingly satisfied with his proposed solution. 

“We’re not married, so I wouldn’t be a widow and you’re not getting a funeral pyre. This is the 21st century. Your body’s getting shipped off to a crematorium,” you tell him dryly. “They’ll cook you up. We’ll do a little bit of grieving and say a prayer or something. Then we’ll pick your bones, put everything in the urn, and be done in time for lunch.”

He slouches forward and props up his elbow on his knee so that he can rest his chin in his palm with a pout, doing everything that he can with his posture to convey his unhappiness.

“Who’s we? You and your new boyfriend?” he asks and you would liken him to a sulking teenager who didn’t get their way, but that would be an insult to the students at Jujutsu High. 

“No, me and my new husband,” you smirk and he gasps as he turns back towards you, horror coloring his features.

“This is my death! Take it seriously!” he cries.

“Satoru, you’re not dying anytime soon. Why does it matter?” you reply, your tone short as your irritation finally begins to start peeking through.

“It matters because I want to know that you’re not gonna be off fucking some other guy a week after I die,” he mutters, leaning back into the couch and crossing his arms over his chest. 

“I’m not gonna be fucking some other guy,” you snap and now it’s your turn to lean forward in your seat, your elbows on your knees as you tiredly rub your face with your hands. 

“You will two years after I die,” he huffs and you groan at his petty response.

“Can you shut up about ‘two years’ already? It was just a number I threw out. I didn’t put a lot of thought into it,” you explain, hoping that he’ll drop the topic despite knowing that Gojo has never been one to let anything go. 

There’s a slow creeping weariness that you can feel settling into your bones. It’s one that you usually only feel after a bad mission, not when arguing with Gojo. Feeling it in such a domestic setting is putting you on edge.

“Why not? This is my death we’re talking about!” he presses and you feel your self-control crack.

“Exactly! I don’t want to think about it!” you shout back. 

You’re not sure if it’s because of how loud your voice suddenly is or the admission altogether, but it seems to stun him into silence. You immediately find yourself regretting your words, hating how exposed they’ve left you. 

The last thing you want is to see the look on his face and so you bury your face further into your hands. You can feel his gaze on you and even if he didn’t have the Six Eyes, you think it would burn just as hot. 

“I don’t want to think about you dying,” you mumble, unable to stop yourself from continuing. “So can we please just drop it already?”

There’s a heavy silence that hangs over the two of you. Eventually, it breaks when Gojo lets out a soft sigh. You feel the couch cushions shifting as he leans forward and tosses an arm over your shoulders. He then drops his chin to rest on top of your head as he holds you close.

“Don’t worry. I’m the strongest,” he says, his tone light as he tries to reassure you. It’s only because you know him so well that you can tell how forced his nonchalance is. “No matter what, I’ll win.”

You find yourself wrapping his words around you, clutching onto them tightly like a safety blanket that refuse to let go of.

“Isn’t your aunt’s boyfriend like half her age?” he suddenly asks, switching the topic altogether and you lean further into his side in silent gratitude. 

“More than half. He’s younger than us,” you reply with a quiet snort, finally dropping your hands from your face.

“Hm, well good for her.”

He doesn’t respond to your taunt, and you think the universe is finally showing you mercy and allowing you to fall back asleep. But then he gives an exaggerated sigh, pulling your waning attention back to him without even needing to say a word — an art that he’s perfected over the years that you’ve been together.

“I guess you don’t need to spend ten years mourning me,” he says and you groan, wanting nothing more than for this conversation to be over and for him to just let you sleep like mere mortals do. “I mean, mourn me a little at least. But ten years is asking a lot, isn’t it?”

“Satoru…” you warn. It would probably sound more threatening if you hadn’t yawned halfway through saying it.

“But, just wait a while before you start dating again, alright? Even in the afterlife, I don’t know if my ego could take it if you moved onto someone new too quickly,” he jokes, but beneath the self-deprecating humor, there’s a strange vulnerability that finally has you opening your eyes.

And you immediately wish you hadn’t because doing so shatters the strange, liminal space that comes with not being fully asleep and not fully awake. Your mind is still drowsy and it takes a minute to realize that something is wrong. All that you’re aware of is that you’re now soberingly conscious. 

When reality manages to catch up with you, your world comes crashing down around you in sharp, jagged pieces. Because where only a moment ago, you could feel Gojo’s warmth behind you in bed, hear his voice in your ears, feel his presence in your life, all that’s left now is an aching void. 

You’re overcome with the urge to look over your shoulder, despite knowing that you’ll find nothing when you do so. And that’s what keeps you lying still, staring straight ahead into the dark. 

This is your own Schrödinger's cat — if you don’t turn around then you don’t know if he’s not there. Just like the cat, Gojo is still alive so long as you don’t look. 

“S-Satoru…?” you ask, unable to help yourself. Your voice is rough with sleep, and it sounds so different, so much more real, from how you just heard it when you were talking with him. Maybe that’s answer enough. 

“Satoru?” Your voice cracks when you try again, only to be met with deafening silence. 

There’s a sharp pain in your ribcage, one that you’ve become familiar with over the past few months. You instinctively bring a hand to the middle of your chest, pressing your palm down hard to alleviate the ache despite knowing that it won’t help. 

The bed has always been too large. It had to be in order to fit his lanky frame. But now it threatens to swallow you whole and you scramble to escape it, your legs getting caught in the sheets as you rush to kick them off. 

You stumble out of the bedroom and make your way to the living room, where you fling a shaking hand out to flip the light switch. The sudden brightness has you squinting and after you’ve taken a moment for your eyes to adjust, you find yourself dropping to your knees in front of the small, wooden altar that’s been set up against the wall. 

Your breath catches in your throat as you’re met with Gojo’s smiling portrait — the only way you’ll ever be face-to-face again. His sunglasses sit carefully, reverently, to one side, folded on top of his trademark blindfold. A small box of mochi from his favorite café sits on the shelf just beneath in offering. 

With slightly trembling hands, you open the butsudan’s drawer and pick up the box of incense, sighing when you open it and see that there’s only one stick left. You absently note to buy more when you go out tomorrow for your regular visit to Gojo’s grave. 

Once you’ve set the last stick in its elegant dish and lit it, you take a deep, shaking breath, and try to push down the wave of tears you feel burning behind your eyes. The fabric of your black sleep shorts is clenched tightly between your fingers where your hands sit on your thighs. 

You suddenly feel angry and you latch onto the burning emotion, desperate to feel anything other than the overwhelming grief that’s found a home deep in your soul. Its roots have grown and stretched over the months to consume every piece of you, like an invasive species that’s destroyed everything else until it’s the only thing left in your life.

“You asshole.” You meant to spit the words out, but instead, they fall flat along with your resentment. “Of course I’ll mourn you. Did you really think I wouldn’t?”

Your head drops forward and you cover your eyes with one hand, as if doing so will hide your tears from Gojo’s ever-watchful gaze. Despite your best efforts, your self-control finally slips and you softly begin to sob.

“Y-you wanted ten years?” you ask, still unable to look at him. “I’ll mourn you forever. I promise.”

If he was still alive, you would have offered to make him a binding vow. You should have offered to make him a binding vow. Instead, you can only make one with yourself. 

“Please tell me this is just my imagination,” you murmur, desperately hoping that some passing god will take pity on you and give you what you want more than anything. You don’t care what you have to give up, as long as they’ll give you Gojo back. 

With your eyes closed and your hand blocking any light, you find yourself wondering if you’ve fallen back into that liminal space once again, where everything is and isn’t at the same time. If you try hard enough, you can almost hear him tsking and asking you why you didn’t spend more on a bigger butsudan. 

But the scent of the incense and the soft sounds of your crying keep you from slipping away from the present. 

Your vision is blurry with your tears when you lift your gaze back up to look at Gojo. As his photo grins back, you sniffle and wipe your messy face with the back of your wrist before you press your palms together and bow your head.

“I pray that this all is just my imagination,” you beg him, pleading with him to perform one last miracle for you.

But when you open your eyes and find yourself still alone, the incense burning, and only your grief and his portrait for company, you know that this is reality — even as it falls out from under you.

[gremoria411]

The poor decisions don’t stop, since I decided to start Gundam Ibo Urdr Hunt while watching 0079. (Though realistically, it seems I’ll just end up putting 0079 on the back burner for a bit). This was motivated by Four Factors:

The announcement that they’re actually going to do something with the series going forward (I’m *hoping* for a full series or compilation movie, but I can’t guess at how practical that’d be, since I don’t know what the series is like yet). Regardless, I felt I should at least watch the series so I have an opinion on it. EDIT: I’m betting a compilation movie, there’s a lot of reused animation, and a lot of the parts lacking animation are conversations.

I already bought the model kits of both the Marchosias and the Asmoday purely on the strength of their designs, and I kinda want to decide if the Hajiroboshi or Cyclase’s Schwalbe Graze are similarly worthwhile (I’m slowly coming around to the Graze), since now’s probably the best time to go for them.

I kinda really want to know what’s going on with Cyclase Mayer. I really liked Mcgillis, and so I’m interested in seeing what a similarly designed character is going to be like in Post Disaster (plus, he’s a serious-faced man in a business suit, so he’s probably going to be fun to watch just from a broader perspective, given what characters in this universe typically have to deal with).

I haven’t actually been that excited about it, which annoys me. Maybe I didn’t see much hype, maybe it’s too close to Witch from Mercury/ the SEED Movie, or maybe I’d just gotten a little too settled in Post Disaster

Also, I just watched the opening for the first time and feel like I should jot something down;

Do each of the rings come with a maid? And Cyclase has two of them? Is he just trying to put a maid household together by collecting all the rings?….…….is this a Gundam harem anime? (I mean I know they’ve been trying to diversify lately, but still….)

Obviously it isn’t, but the thought did briefly cross my mind as I watched the opening.

*the following contains spoilers for the first four episodes of Gundam Ibo: Urdr Hunt*

I’ve watched the first four episodes, as of writing, so I’m just going to jot down a few thoughts;

I like how each of the maids is shown to be different in personality. Berose’s so obviously unhappy with her posting and Parstai actively manipulates things to get a better owner for the Urdr hunt ring (granted it didn’t take much). And then Korunaru’s just cheery by comparison.

I kinda expected the Zan Brothers to be a comedy side-act - a duo of bumblers pursuing the Urdr hunt, based on their aesthetics (very flashy). As such, Rome murdering a human debris for failure and Aiko barely concealing his hostility toward his idiot brother were both very surprising, and a welcome addition.

I didn’t expect I’d like Range’s suit, the Enzo, as much as I did. It feels like someone took the Hexa Frame used by the Hugo and made an actually solid mobile suit out of it - Range loses because he’s outclassed, not because the design is lacking in any particular way. It’s balanced, well armed and has a neat aesthetic. Good job guys.

Similarly, I really like the design of the Monkey Rodi’s. So sleek.

Alright, so I’m assuming the Chairman of the Board for the Omden Colony Company is Torrado Omden? Regardless, absolute peak character design. Man looks like an overgrown toddler and I hate him for it. It really sells him throwing away resources and lives on this thing as…… sorta casually despicable? Like it’s a bad financial quarter?

Overall, I’m really enjoying it. But I do have two criticisms I want to note at this juncture. Though I’m reasonably certain that it gets addressed later, Wistario Afram (is it Afram or Afam? I think it’s Afam, but Afram just rolls off the tongue better) is just kind of the least interesting of the Urdr Hunt participants we’ve seen so far. Like, he wants to use the money to rebuild the Venus Colony into a major tourist attraction. That’s a solid, achievable goal, and the way he talks and acts makes me feel like it’s less about “can he do it” and more about “how will he do it”. I don’t mind that angle, but it’s very different from everyone else around him. Range is trapped working for a company that will cut him off for any perceived failure, and he’s grappling with the fact that it’s not the solution he thought it would be and that he’s got more in common with Afam than his employers. It’s a good angle, as he slowly re-examines what his place in the world, and the crushing pressure exerted by both the Colony Company - a very powerful organisation, as evidenced by the fact that they consider the grand prize of Urdr hunt to be pocket change; and that exerted by the Hajiroboshi itself, a Gundam from the Calamity War. Meanwhile, 598 is enamoured with the idea of becoming like Tekkadan, showing the far-reaching influence they have, however, he’s forced to re-evaluate his own actions and who they’re truly for - in doing so, he can realise who his enemies are and actually take steps to free himself from their control, and from there take’s the first step to becoming like his idols in Tekkadan. They’re both very compelling characters, and it’s just unfortunate that Wistario can’t seem to eclipse that. It could be that we were just told how bad the situation is in Venus, rather than shown - a few shots of the prison’s might have helped, or showing how they affect the populace.

That said, now that I come to write this all down, both of their origins are somewhat similar to Tekkadan (598’s for obvious reasons) - it’s possible that I’m only rating them as highly as I am due to the familiar elements. With that in mind, it is possible that Wistario may offer a fresher perspective on the world of Post Disaster.

My second criticism is one I’ve mention before, regarding Noisy Fairy; Don’t call someone “character A” it’s stupid, because the message it sends to me is “this person isn’t worth caring about”. If a character is worth caring about, they’re always called “mysterious girl” or “???”, so “Girl B”, “Mercenary A” and “Board Member C” are just worthless. Does it cost more to give them names? Do named characters denote different rates for their voice actors or something? It’s just really immersion-breaking, because it creates the sense that named characters are the only ones that matter.

(Also Radonitsa Colony being essentially a prison colony is great, because it roughly parallels the real- life British Empire’s treatment of Australia, though granted without any natives).

[waitmyturtles]

Alright. SPOILERS. It might take me a couple posts over today and tomorrow to process EAW ep. 14. I’ll try to keep things organized. My Big Thoughts on Young-woo are at the bottom. Long post warning.

1) I’m going to sound a far different bell than the reviews I’m seeing on the tag. I think the writing of ep. 14 was absolutely FANTASTIC. I am giddy over how good this writing was and I can’t wait to re-watch this episode. 

I think ep. 13 needed to set up a lot of conflict very quickly to get to the important penultimate episode next week, which we know can be huge. Today’s (Thursday’s) episode, for me, ironed out a lot of the sudden conflict we saw, including contextualizing Attorney Jung’s illness. When he says that South Korea has the best treatment for stomach cancer (a relatively common ailment in those parts of Asia that we don’t see as much in the US), I believe it, and I think the writers intentionally put those lines in there to give viewers who know that background a touch of relief (but we’re still worried about him). 

2) Content-wise, obviously, things are not going as linearly as us viewers would have liked or expected. But y’all -- I believe the writers know this and are doing this to us. Look at what Su-yeon said to Min-woo: “I almost reported you to the police for the crime of not staying in character.” The writers know what they’re doing! 

Another way I think the writers are injecting lightness here -- when Jun-ho said he wouldn’t drink, and then he got plastered. I think it was set up to be cute. I’m not reading a forever devastation and finality to the break-up, partially based on the existence of that scene. More on this below. 

(Also, side note, now we know that Min-woo knows. And, whoa, seemed to actually be supportive of his homeboy in the relationship -- Min-woo hadn’t tried to get them to break up, I guess?)

3) I believe the writers are setting up a moral dilemma conflict for Min-woo that I might be here for. NOT a hard bet, because I think he’s still scheming, but I wonder.

I also think that Su-yeon is fixing to be a freaking superhero vis à vis that dilemma. I’m getting that from the preview for ep. 15, where we see Su-yeon protecting Young-woo from reporters.

4) I’m seeing fam on the tag calling out CEO Han for being evil and scheme-y, but we already knew she was, and Young-woo’s dad knows this, too. Her scheme is not a surprise to me. Her hiring of Young-woo was going to lead to something like this. I just want to know their background in law school. Maybe CEO Han has a hereditary competition with Tae Su-mi. I want to know that juicy juicy drama. 

(I wrote this before, but this is why I think CEO Han eats Min-woo over this somehow. At least I hope so.)

(Frankly, and I know this is bad of me because it puts Young-woo in the middle of all of this shit, but I hope CEO Han blinks out Tae Su-mi. I think Tae Su-mi is pure evil.)

5) I think the big themes of this episode were: compassion, empathy, creativity, and revelation. Here’s why.

I believe the stories of Attorney Jung and Young-woo are linked. He’s the elder -- a senior partner who ignored his personal life, who ignored the people who loved him personally, to live and breathe the law. As his ex-wife notes, he’s more alive when talking to an attorney than when talking to her.

Wasn’t Young-woo the same as she was breaking up with Jun-ho? She was more energized about her law revelation than about communicating the reasons for the break-up. She kept that part to herself. And Jun-ho, bless him, was asking for that reasoning, continuing to demand to Young-woo that she work on empathizing with him.

We know that communicatively, there is a lot that Young-woo and Jun-ho need to say to each other. But this IS a drama, and the writers need to stave off that content to wrap up the series next week. 

However, I REALLY think we saw a lot of compassionate growth in Young-woo this episode. We saw her ignore Attorney Jung’s insistence to not fuss over him. We saw her absorbing the words of the song about the burden of love at the noraebang. We see her looking at Jun-ho on the plane. 

I think the way the writers are building Young-woo’s self-awareness and self-growth is absolutely gorgeous. In many instances, it’s wordless. Because -- we see her, as she’s growing into her adulthood, learning the words to use in these moments.

Autistic or not, aren’t we all doing that, growing as adults, learning about our emotions and ourselves? What’s the difference here, between her and Attorney Jung? Not a lot, in this moment. 

6) Jun-ho and ex-wife Ji-su, the two lonely left-behind lovers. Ji-su says she left Attorney Jung because of her loneliness. We see Jun-ho in his loneliness on the beach, left behind because Young-woo will not take him to where she thinks she’s going -- to always need to be cared for in her life, leaving her lover lonely.

First, we know she doesn’t need to be as cared for as she thinks, because we know she’s a breadwinning baddie. (She’s confident enough to take care of herself as the rest of the team eats the meat noodles with her take-away gimbap. She’s like -- I got me.)

Second, I don’t believe the break-up is final because of the pep talk Attorney Jung gives to Jun-ho. I think there’s a communication ultimatum between these two lovebirds, and Young-woo will need to decide to step up and believe she’s worthy of love, AND that she’s more independent than general society makes her think she is. 

7) This is where I think creativity comes in. After that pep talk, I think Jun-ho is fixing to fight for love. God help us, I think this is finally when some communication will take place.

Also, separately, creativity and empathy: I agree with Young-woo that we saw Attorney Jung at his absolute best when speaking to the Abbot at the end of the episode. Speaking to an opposing client is definitely skirting the edges of legal ethics. But he suggests that the temple work with Hanbada’s government affairs team, which is not technically a legal team. Genius. He wants to proactively help in the best way HE can. 

Did you see how proud of the team he was when his rookie attorneys were pitching the noodle restaurant owner? He’s realized he’s passed on his wisdom, creativity, and empathy. A huge law firm pitching a restaurant owner in Jeju. Even Min-woo getting into it. I love how the love for Attorney Jung is deeply spread out here.

8) One more point on empathy and compassion.

Did you notice, when ex-wife Ji-su was speaking to Young-woo, what was behind Ji-su?

It was a poster about women’s health. I can’t read Korean, but I did notice the small pink graphic of a set of ovaries. 

(Nothing like that will ever get past a mama.)

That shot almost certainly was not an accident.

Part of Ji-su’s sadness is likely not having a family with Attorney Jung. Yet she cared enough for him to fly down from Seoul to Jeju. And is concerned enough about his health to want him to have an earlier surgery.

Despite their break-up -- there’s still love and caring.

Despite Young-woo’s and Jun-ho’s break-up -- there’s still love and caring.

And, I think by including that poster in that shot, it gives us something to chew on. Young-woo, right now, is thinking she’s not deserving of love because she’ll leave her lover lonely in his caretaking of her. 

But I think -- in the most subtle, gorgeous way possible -- the writers have left us asking: can Young-woo deserve love and family of her own?

We all know that answer.

[iveneverplayedmegaman]

I think this is my favorite Mega Man comic. If you don’t mind my asking, how did you get into the Mega Man franchise, since you’ve never played the games?

Thank you! That means a lot to me ❤️

To answer your question, I got into Megaman a few years ago when I saw this video randomly in my recommendations:

I thought it was really funny at the time, but for whatever reason I kept coming back to it and thinking about it. Cutman is just such a goofy guy in this! So I just kept daydreaming about different scenarios he’d get himself into, and that eventually morphed into CMDHB! I could go on and on over how I’ve interpreted this video and Cutman just from this starting point but at that point we get into spoilers. Maybe down the line I’ll write more of a thesis statement on that topic once I write more of my own story lol. Just even the CONCEPT of Cutman has such a stranglehold on my psyche that I just HAD to write about him, even though I STILL haven’t sat down to play the games, read the comics, watch the shows, or any other thing like that. My knowledge of this series is entirely based on fanart, the occasional out of context comic page, wikis and a couple of out of context Ruby spears clips. I’m not even joking.

Most of the time I just take what I see out of context and try to spin it into a funny joke or something that I consider interesting. Even if I get something “wrong” I still have a lot of fun with it. I guess the main thing I like about the series is looking at these funky little robots with their silly little characters designs and two sentence personality blurbs and writing and drawing stories based on that. It’s why I’m always looking into what the fan base is doing too, cuz there really is a running theme here of making a lot out of a little. You end up with a lot of cool interpretations based off of characters that initially look pretty simple. One of these days I’ll probably engage with an official work though lol. This is actually why my username is what it is. Cuz I always try my best to write these characters in a way that’s interesting and makes sense when compared to canon (as far as I know) but if I get it wrong, hey I warned you “I’ve never played megaman”.

Kind of an unusual answer I know, but I just plain like Cutman’s vibes! And I still have a LOT of jokes and stories to tell with these guys!

TLDR: I saw one (1) meme about Cutman and I got obsessed with him

[applestorms]

GOOD OMENS.

CLENCH UP BITCHES WE'RE DOING THIS. SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS READ WITH CAUTION my hands are still shaking from finishing season 2 approximately 13.420 minutes ago so everybody clam the fuigk up/down. we're getting IN to this one. 10 sections.

okay, before i get into anything specific, i just wanna say: this series has had some of the best writing i've seen in a tv show & it's really fucking gratifying to watch. this season in particular had some really clear, distinct themes that were evolved upon and executed pretty much perfectly imo, to the point that i almost feel like i can guess what a good deal of season 3 is probably gonna look like (see section 12). this is great!! it means the writers are really paying attention to what the story is doing & what the characters are feeling/going through at any given moment in the story, & it just makes the series that much stronger on a rewatch. this season in particular really hits that sweet spot for me of being overt & clear w/ its themes w/o treating its audiences like idiots, it just. works.

i'm not going to touch on season 1 as much here since it's not as fresh as s2 for me rn, but hopefully this post can help bring some additional analysis/reflection to the new season. not sure how much of this will be totally crazy wild & new, but perhaps some interesting points will come outta the process. hope you enjoy the read!! there's 13 sections so feel free to skip around.

1. aziraphale as the beautiful execution of a flawed protagonist (ft. crowley's pining)

one of the best parts of this season by far comes from the character writing, particularly for the main two & especially for aziraphale. aziraphale was my personal favorite to watch for this entire season actually, he & crowley are both such a fucking mess but aziraphale in particular hides it in such a fascinating way to me. it's not just like watching a car crash, it's like sitting on a park bench watching a man drive a bus into a stoplight, like full on crunch the vehicle in half squish, and then just get out & carry on walking like nothing is wrong & he isn't dripping blood & scraping broken bones across the concrete.

on a broader scale, there is something incredibly appealing about how aziraphale & crowley are presented, even at a very base level. even w/o the fantastic acting of michael sheen & david tennant specifically, it's a pretty common thing that fandom will default to shipping Narrative Foils, & these two are the epitome of that. a demon who can't stop being a nice guy & an angel who keeps cutely being an asshole- this is a great base to work off of, & again the execution thus far has been excellent.

what i like about aziraphale in particular is how complex his character ends up being while still fitting into a very particular role. while crowley to some degree fits into an already pretty popular & well-loved character model (that of the grumpy nice guy), aziraphale has to hit a couple of very important & precise traits, being both outwardly very likeable & endearing while simultaneously constantly fucking up & doing increasingly egregious shit. i really can't commend michael sheen enough for his acting in helping to get the balance right- it would be STUPIDLY easy to make aziraphale the most obnoxious character to ever grace the screen if performed or written incorrectly, the kind of outwardly-kind asshole that does horrific shit w/o reflecting since the show runners seem incapable of seeing the character for what they are & it all just ends up driving viewers up the wall (e.g. emily in paris).

what i think makes aziraphale work is the fact that he is just genuine enough in his actions that when he does something legitimately horrible, it's both so subtle you almost don't even pick up on it, too distracted by the emotions you feel in following his perspective, & just motivated enough that it's easy to write him off w/o thinking any deeper. as much as crowley calls aziraphale out for being a bad magician, i think it's spot on that the one thing he is quite skilled at is misdirection. you spend a lot of time in this show following very closely with either aziraphale or crowley's POV, but in s2 especially the contrast between those two views is quite overt. while crowley's perspective is often a lot quieter, more reflective & also overtly anxious as he throws himself into stressful situations purely for the sake of supporting az, aziraphale's POV is always very loud & chaotic as he runs around, finding pubs & fighting demons & doing whatever the fuck else he wants to at any given moment.

the main flaw of aziraphale in this season is, imo, selfishness, a direct contrast to crowley's continual self-sacrifice when it comes to aziraphale. in both cases though, this is (pushed to become) a flaw that i think ultimately leads to their inability to connect at the end of the season. but in order to understand that more, we're going to have to take a closer look into the circumstances that have thus far shaped both aziraphale & crowley's characters.

2. denial as a defense mechanism: heaven & hell as life threatening danger

if there's one thing s2 has not forgotten when it comes to a&c, it's the circumstances of s1 that led them to their current emotional/mental states.

slight tangent to lead back into this point: in my work as a librarian, i end up dealing w/ a very particular set of clientele when it comes to the kinds of people that regularly use a public library. parents w/ young children, older gentlemen & ladies looking to escape the more extreme weather, and (for my city, at least) lots and lots of people who no longer have stable housing. since an often forgotten about goal of a public library (well, to the general population) is social services, as a part of my training i've recently been working through a book on what is essentially trauma-informed customer service, which has led to a lot of insight.

one point in particular that i want to highlight here is the idea that traumatic instances are both common & intensely significant in how they can change a person's behavior. defense mechanisms that may make sense in the context of a traumatic event will often stick w/ people even as the context they're in changes & the instincts are no longer useful, instead making the individuals' life even more difficult.

if there is one trauma that defines a lot of the current problems that a&c are going through, it's the fear that originates from the constant surveillance and, in turn, threat of complete eradication that comes from both heaven & hell.

significantly, crowley & aziraphale both respond to this threat in distinctly different ways: where crowley clings to the idea of escape, of creating a place where it's him and aziraphale against the world (alpha centauri), in part idealizing aziraphale as both his only friend ("friend") & the only person he could ever truly trust (crowley also likely has some trauma from the fall but we'll get to that), aziraphale viciously denies that they even have a relationship, all the while simultaneously relying on crowley heavily to do a lot of his dirty work for him. (see this post for the endgame twist on that idea.) it's significant to me that a good chunk of aziraphale's earliest morally dubious actions involve lying- since he's been doing it for so long, it's probably one of the easiest things for him to write off as not that bad, so it's natural that he would default to it as a defense mechanism here too.

to clarify, crowley does engage in denial too, though it's obvious from the emotional climaxes of both season 1 & 2 that he is much less committed to it, likely doing it for the sake of easing aziraphale's mind and/or giving himself something to fall back on so he doesn't attract too much attention from the people that can really hurt them. overall though, these are both basically just fight/flight responses- crowley ultimately wants to run away from or fight everyone that can hurt them (& betrayed him by letting him down in the past) and aziraphale ultimately just wants to deny that the problem even exists.

if we see aziraphale's later stated goal of, "Let's change heaven for the better," as an evolution off of his earlier mindset, this is also basically what their final argument in ep6 comes down to: crowley wanting to run away and aziraphale wanting to go & fight for change. what's so aggravating about this conversation is that they also want the exact same thing: EACH OTHER. (idiots.) (maggie & nina were spot on, of course. it's not just nightingales missing in that silence.) this is not even to mention the fact that they are utilizing these defense mechanisms not just in an attempt to protect themselves, but ultimately to protect one another. think about that one late at night if you wanna get up the motivation to key mr. gaiman's car.

it's also interesting to note that in s1 crowley basically wins this argument, getting the chance to settle down (albeit, still under pretty questionable circumstances) as he & aziraphale (supposedly) create their own little corner of the world away from everyone else. it still doesn't work though as neither of their solutions really get at the core of the problem, which is 1. the horrific bureaucratic systems of heaven & hell that Don't Give a Shit about People at all, and 2. their own unspoken fears & feelings (romantic & otherwise).

3. good, evil, & narrative foils: crowley edition

since i extrapolated on aziraphale's character in section 1 and a&c's relationship in 2, i think it's only right that i look into crowley more for 3.

for all the pain & agony & tears that it brings, i really do think that ep6 is the best ep of s2. specifically, i think that ep6 is the one that shows the primary issues of a&c that have been plaguing them throughout the season (& even previously in s1) the most overtly, and this is especially true of crowley.

there are two things that aziraphale gets wrong about heaven in their final argument: 1st, the idea that heaven is necessarily better than hell, & 2nd the idea that crowley would ever want anything to do w/ it again.

i've seen some people talking about crowley like he's the voice of reason this season, but i don't necessarily agree, or at least not entirely. he's completely right when he says that heaven & hell is toxic in their final argument, yes, but i don't think his motivation in saying that is purely from observation either. remember that point i mentioned earlier, about crowley also having trauma from his initial fall? where aziraphale naturally trusts people to a fault (see: gabriel, but also picking up shax, the graveyard, etc.), crowley is plagued by a complete inability to trust anyone around him, & it's my opinion that a lot of this comes from the trauma of his initial fall.

the one exception to this is, of course, aziraphale, who we can see attempting to be a friend to crowley both before & long after his fall, but aside from him crowley Does Not trust anyone else around him & honestly for good reason. while we can write off hell as just being Like That, even if crowley didn't initially want to fall (as is heavily implied in a few flashback scenes), he certainly doesn't want to be dragged back into a supposedly great position that he knows he could lose again at any wrong comment. this is also (in part) why i think crowley reacts so strongly to aziraphale's "Nothing lasts forever," comment- after going through the horror of losing his divinity & all the stress of the last few seasons, the one thing crowley probably wants is stability, & he's been relying on aziraphale as the source of that. you're both doing the dance for this one, boys.

to reiterate: don't forget the graveyard scene when it comes to crowley doing absolutely anything for aziraphale to the point that it hurts him, both in terms of the supposed punishment he got from hell (that az skips over real fast in his narration) & how aziraphale continues to deny both the reality of their relationship & how much his denial hurts crowley.

4. beelz & gabe the weirdest couple imaginable. good for them. good for them. also: heaven & hell as two equally controlling/toxic sides of a bureaucracy

the Big Bads of the last few seasons took more of a backseat for this one which makes sense considering the focus on a&c and all of the parallel couples, but i do think the one point that was emphasized for them is very important, and that's the ways in which both heaven & hell parallel each other as shitty bureaucratic pyramids of power.

if we consider this meme to be true, i think crowley really is right when it comes to his analysis of heaven & hell, though we're probably just gonna have to wait until s3 to see the exact route the show decides to take.

a big running thread w/in either of these two groups is the fight for promotions, both in terms of people clawing their way up to get more power & in terms of people being replaceable. crowley & gabriel getting kicked out of their positions is just a vacancy of power to the companies that are Good Omens Heaven & Hell, and there is a very clear parallel between shax & michael & their desire for control. what's notable is how that parallel might also now extend to aziraphale what w/ his new promotion. all very fitting concepts to cover in a post-covid, writers-strike context, which i have seen our resident mr. gaiman posting about.

5. yuri on ice, hannibal, & the beauty of acknowledged romantic tension

if there is ONE thing i am disgustingly grateful for in this show it's the fact that we finally have some concrete follow-through on the romantic tension between a&c that permeated through s1. there's only so many times a man can call his best bud "Angel" completely unironically before it gets fucking stupid (cough cough dean winchester cough). but also, to put it in the words of another text post around here: I love how the kiss was awful.

even if there wasn't a kiss, the fact that this fucking entire season fucking revolved around love & featured all kinds of parallel couples should be enough to clue you in on the romantic tension between a&c, if you somehow were blind enough to miss it before. that being said, i'm really glad that the kiss was executed the way that it was, essentially summarizing all of the tension & anguish that had been built up over the last few seasons in an explosion. the state of aziraphale & crowley's relationship hurts more because they kissed, because the tension finally overflowed & it still wasn't enough to stop him from getting in the stupid elevator & running away again.

sorry had to take a break to aggressively listen to the better call saul theme song again. anyways, while i know there are some other shows that have set precedent for this in acknowledging the romantic development between their leads, i can't stop thinking about two in particular in comparison to good omens: yuri on ice, for the literal cinematic parallels between the kiss, and nbc hannibal, for the creator acknowledgement & slow lead up to the climax.

what i am desperately hoping & praying for w/ good omens is season 3, since it feels like all too often when we finally get a good, Gay:tm: show it's always this big, flashy thing right at the end that everyone freaks out about & adores (around these parts, at least) but is never evolved upon. i think gomens has a good chance since we've got more precedent now, the creators/actors/etc are more open about it, & the season is clearly unfinished w/ a ravenous fanbase, but something something supernatural trauma i'll trust it when i see it. can't always believe these corporate fuckers. at the very least though they probably wouldn't write this kind of ending if they didn't think they had a good case for another season, so.

ok, a couple shorter sections cause i'm undoubtedly gonna run out of space if i keep at this pace:

6. the resurrectionists was a really good arc that i enjoyed a lot

exactly what it says tbh, the writing for this arc in particular really stood out to me.

i mentioned earlier that s2 has some really good character writing & i think that's in part because it's necessary as a kind of transition season, reflecting on the chaos that happened w/ the first go at armageddon & setting up for the next apocalyptic event that is likely planned for s3. it's for this reason that i think the resurrectionists arc is really strong, establishing in particular all the flaws of aziraphale's character that i went over previously in a very interesting way that still manages to weave into the previously established, albeit quite sparse flashback timeline established in s1. the morally dubious nature of grave robbing for the sake of science & medicine is the perfect context to put characters like a&c in, and the more overt look into class w/ a character like elspeth works really well in helping to ground the more abstract social commentary associated w/ heaven & hell.

7. ramblings about sequels & whatnot

it can be really difficult to write a sequel, especially when the first go at the story cleaned up its plot so well by the end, but where s2 is strongest imo is in establishing the ways that crowley & aziraphale still need to grow.

i almost think that this season had to end horrifically tragic, in a similar way that i think book 2 of the simon snow series wayward son had to end on a pretty dour note. in order for 1 & 3 to have decently high notes, 2 just often has to be pretty miserable to balance it all out.

this is also why i think the maggie/nina storyline is so important overall. not only do those two establish the most overt romantic parallel to a&c, helping to transition the story from s1 & set up for ep6, but they also end on a distinctly hopeful note that's in direct contrast to the scene that comes immediately after they leave. the parallel plants at least the tiniest seed of hope that a&c can sort their shit out if given some time & communication, similar to maggie & nina. it also makes a lot more sense in establishing why crowley chooses that moment of all times to bother w/ a love confession- i genuinely don't think the kiss would work if m&n didn't have a little sit-down intervention w/ him beforehand.

8. SPECULATION: aziraphale vs. crowley apocalyptic fight, dissolving of the current organization of heaven & hell, affirmation of the beauty of humanity & morality?

a list of my speculation about what may or may not happen in s3:

apocalypse part 2 only this time aziraphale & crowley are actually gonna be fighting each other & it's going to be fucking agonizing to watch especially in direct contrast to s1

there's probably going to be some sort of attempt to get crowley into an equal/parallel position to aziraphale in hell. whether or not he actually decides to take this position is kinda up in the air, but either way he's going to fight it at first out of a hatred of both sides. if he does eventually agree it'll be under some sort of condition to save aziraphale, and/or a fake out trick that also is to save aziraphale.

i just don't think i can see a happy ending where heaven & hell stay in their same structure. w/ such big characters as gabriel & beelzebub just fucking gone into the middle of nowhere there's gotta be some kind of re-establishment of the two sides & their relations. the only way it might not change is if the Religion Lore gets in the way, but w/ the established politics of this show & mr. gaiman i can't see an ending that just allows the status quo to continue on exactly as horrible as it's been.

crowley back in his apartment? (plsplspls.) also something really heart-wrenching & emotional related to the car & the bookstore after a&c have been separated from them because of course. personally requesting additional exploration of the car as a symbol of crowley himself/able to be influenced by aziraphale e.g. scooting towards az, yellow is so pretty, etc. etc.

more flashbacks, maybe more from crowley's pov this time? like something to do w/ that period where he was supposedly being punished for helping aziraphale, more about his experiences w/ hell & the fall, etc.

something something affirmation of the beauty of humanity & the world, ft. a&c bonding over their mutual love of it again. they were each others only real friend for how many thousands of years, if they're gonna be fighting OR attempting a romantic bond that's going to be significant.

when the actual romantic reconciliation happens is kinda up in the air, but it depends on what the Big Bad ends up being, an external force of heaven & hell or a&c themselves. personally, i think that heaven & hell are just gonna keep getting weaker but w/ aziraphale in charge maybe that'll change (or maybe it'll be the catalyst lolol). if it's external they'll probably get together earlier in the season, if it's more internal probably not til the end, though there might be a momentary reconciliation for the sake of fighting something else.

i'm a bit more up in the air about this one, but maybe something more w/ satan & god as the top of the pyramid when it comes to heaven & hell? good omens is all about that kind of contrast so it might make sense. this also assumes that s3 is the presumed end of the series, which may or may not be the case.

if this does end up being the end of the series: i really, really, really, would not be surprised if crowley & aziraphale end up fully human. it's quite the obvious answer but it just makes so much sense for their characters, w/ their love of the world & whatnot. then again a lot of their relationship has also been related to immortality, but also then again there's a lot of stories out there about immortals hating their long lives & wanting to just settle down like normal people so. ehh. oh speaking of settling down,

9. they're NOT married, that's the PROBLEM: thirteen seconds.

thirteen. full. seconds. of the Most Awful Kiss. known to contemporary tv.

they're not married that's th eentire fuckigngggng proble m.,,..,,..,.

10. "I forgive you."

this is such a nonsensical line it makes me so absurdly angry. what the fuck are you doing aziraphale. well, presumably the exact same thing crowley was trying to do by kissing you, but i digress.

bonus edit, i thought of this literal seconds before falling asleep & now i can’t get it out of my mind: crowley needs aziraphale for stability, aziraphale needs stability to have crowley. mic drop

[morethanafanstuff]

Red Dead Redemption 3 - My thoughts no one cares about, but I want to share them anyway

Playing once again Red Dead Redemption 2, my hope for a third game remains strong and with high hopes. Having no one to talk about, I will post my thoughts here, where probably no one reads it, no one cares about, but yet here I am. If there actually is someone who reads this, beware of spoilers, because this post will include them. Red Dead Redemption 2 is one of my favorite games ever, if not THE favorite game of mine. I love it deeply and in my eyes Arthur is truly the best written, most perfect male protagonist of any game ever created. Yes. I said that. And I stick to it. Now the game also gave us some opportunities for a third game. So I just want to share these options here. Sadie Adler I think Sadie is one of the characters that is perfectly set up for both a sequel and a prequel. I personally love her character, her writing. Though we have some idea how Sadies life was before she was rescued by Dutchs gang, there is still some potential for a prequel to be told. How she got this life far up in the Grizzlies, if there might be more to the conflict with the O'Driscolls. We did not get to see her life with her husband that she truly loved, so his dead is the perfect tragedy for a game like this. On the other hand, the epiloge of RDR2 set up a new story for her in South America. It would not only give us a complete new map to discover, the writers would have some freedom here for a story. But also there is a chance that her past with the Van Der Linde Gang plays a role, since she is one of the very few left alive. It could even play simultaneously to RDR1, which would make sense, since the wild west is also still at it end in this one. I think there is potential for her here.

Hosea Matthews There is no need to say what a great man Hosea is. Is there actually anyone who hates him? Of course this is only possible as prequel to RDR2. They could tell the story more in-depth on how he met Dutch, how the gang formed, lastly until we reached the Blackwater heist. In that case the story would follow him over many years, but imagine if we get even more background on how they met everyone, seeing them form and care as a gang. Based on the ending of RDR2 it'd be heartbreaking. If they follow the epiloge scheme we could play as Arthur again, just like we played John at the end of RDR2. Maybe during the journey to the Grizzlies, but I guess that wouldn't make much sense, since Hosea is alive during this time. Jenny I think this might be a very far reach, but her me out. We don't know a lot about her. We only know that she was a young woman that got shot during the Blackwater heist. And since the main character died in both games, wouldn't that be something to build a story on? Because we don't have full details on her death there is a lot to build around. Maybe her dead helped to let Arthur escape? Maybe just like Arthur with John, this was her redemption. Saving Arthur by taking a bullet. I know that in this case is not mentioned by Arthur in RDR2, but Arthur isn't even mentioned in the first game - obviously, since he was not a fully written character there. So this could work here, too. I honestly think this could be a good story. We could see how she went from a maybe innocent woman to an outlaw. The same goes for the Callander Brothers, who also died during Blackwater. But I am not sure about them since Charles viewed them as bad, which says a lot in a group of outlaws. Again, they could give us a chance to play Arthur in the epiloge, which would make sense here. Since Jenny would die at the end of the game, it'd follow the same scheme. Dutch Okay. So this is actually one I like the very least. Eventhough it might make sense. Experiencing his story would give us some more insight on the leader of the Van der Linde Gang. But truly I personally do not really like him and rather view him as an antagonist of the series. I am not sure if that is an unpopular opinion, but I do not like him due to his behavior towards the end. Dutch is an opportunist. He takes every opportunity to at first save his gang, but at the end his own ass. I lost respect for him and I don't think a game focused on him would change that. Of course he does not have bad qualities only. He surely is honest. I don't think he ever lied about loving Arthur as a son. But the one thing he loves more than Arthur is himself. The one thing he loves more than anyone is himself. He asks for loyality, but is not loyal to his people. He is not truly evil, but I can't see him as a protagonist of a game, but I see why some people might. Bus there is no place for a redemption arc for him in my eyes. Jack Marston I only include him, because I think people might think this is the most obvious option. For me, I don't see it, but this is only due to preference. We know that he got his revenge for John and it might not be without consequences. But giving the time Jack is a grown up man, the game would be set after the wild west is over and most likely during one of the World Wars. And for the Red Dead Redemption series I personally can't see the game working during times like these. I also think it would lose the heart of the game. I don't think we need another game set during one of the wars.

A new story Not sure if I want to leave the story of the Van der Linde Gang, or at least one of the members. But it could work. Maybe set during the peak of the wild west with a new gang, new people and so one. Maybe even as a leader of your own outlaw gang, simply something completly new that plays simultaneously to our beloved Gang. So, I know Charles might be an option. We know that Charley went to Canada to find a wife and build a family. I personally find this to be a good ending of his story. He deserves this. So I am not including him here.

So those are some options that I can think of. Some might be far fetched, but I hope in some way they sound logical. I would say add your own ideas, so I can read them, but honestly I doubt someone read this far. If someone did, thank you.

[kanelia]

"I mean... if they had made Joel's daughter and riley white you would be complaining that there are not black people in tlou." the point of people's criticisms of antiblackness from the show and its unnecessarily deliberate decision to brutalize black bodies for joel and ellie's pain just flew past your head didn't it? whoosh! learn and do better. otherwise shut the fuck up and don't comment on a post as an ignorant white girl, justifying the show and game's racist patterns to poc who are pissed.

Gonna take a second to unpack this because... Sigh.

First of all. SPOILERS AHEAD ALL THE WAY. DONT READ FURTHER IF YOU HAVEN'T WATCHED THE LAST OF US SERIES.

Anyway, you conveniently left the rest of my comment out of your message. I cant find the post anymore, but it was about an article that claimed that TLOU is anti-black because two characters played by poc actors died in the backstory of two main characters.

I have never played the game and I haven't watched this show further than season 1, episode 8 (obv because thats all that has come out this far) so my knowledge at this point is only based on what has happened in in the tv series.

So the show is a horror/drama story in a post-apocalyptic world where most of humanity has been killed off by a horrible disease. And those still living live in a constant fear of meeting the same fate either by catching the disease or by getting killed by other survivors. The whole tension is created by the possibility THAT ANYONE CAN DIE ANY SECOND either because of catching the disease or by the opportunistic individuals. Because of this everybody has gone through a certain trauma of losing a loved one. For that reason, its pretty obvious that major side characters ARE going to die and probably even one of the two main characters (my guess is Joel). Judging by the pics online, Joel´s character in the game is white, but he is played in the show by Pedro Pascal, a Chilean American actor. I thought this would make him a poc (not so sure anymore, someone correct me if im wrong). Ellie is white and also played by a white actor.

This far the show doesn’t have that many major side characters, and most of them have appeared so far only in one episode, so it´s hard to distinct who is a major side character and who is not , but let´s look at the two characters the anti-black accusations are based on:

Sarah, Joel´s daughter who in the game is white, but played by a poc actress in the series. Losing Sarah in the beginning of the outbreak is Joel's cause of trauma and the essential part of his backstory. Yes. I do agree, Sarah has no other part in the story-telling than to provide angst to Joel's backstory. HOWEVER. I feel its far-fetched to say that they hired a poc girl to play Sarah, because they are anti-black and wanted to show black people dying for a white man's angst (and Pascal isn't even white as far as I have understood?). I mean. Maybe Nico Parker was just that good in the auditioning and thats why they hired her? Also maybe they wanted to show that they are not afraid to cast a poc to play a character that was originally white?

My point is this: Should they have cast a white girl for the role of Sarah just because Sarah is a background character that dies and they cant hire a poc to play a character that dies, because that could have been viewed as "anti-black"? Isn't that the definition of racism that someone´s ethnicity prevents them from getting a certain job? Or should they have changed the original plot so that Sarah would have lived just because she was played by a poc? How would have that made any sense?

Riley, unlike Sarah, is a poc both in the game and in the show. She is Ellie´s best friend (and a bit more if you have watched the show). In the show Riley hasnt been confirmed to have died yet, but I assume she is going to die, because she got bitten. Same points I have made about Sarah apply to Riley as well, but because Riley was a poc in the game, I'm pretty sure the same people, who are now accusing the show of anti-blackness, would have been fuming if they had cast a white actor to play Riley. The show would have been accused of "white-washing" a black character and being racist because "white Ellie's love interest cant be black".

Obviously, I do not know about Riley´s full role in the game, but when it comes to the show, I think its a bit of a simplification to claim that her character was nothing more than a source for white person's pain. They spent the whole episode of focusing on her to establish that she is brave, independent and funny. Yes, she got bitten, but imo her body wasnt "brutalized".

I could maybe understand the statements of "anti-blackness" if Sarah and Riley were the only characters to die or even just only pocs of the show, but that is not true at all. In fact, major side characters played by white actors have died just as often as those who have been played by pocs. Bill, Frank, Tess and this far two major villains played by white actors have died. Tommy, Maria and Marlene are played by pocs and are still alive. Besides Sarah and Riley, there are Henry and Sam who are played by pocs and who have died. Together that makes 4 dead characters played by pocs and 5 played by white actors. I dont even say this to claim that those numbers matter, I think the quality of characters matters more than amount, but my point is that this show does not kill off exclusively black characters. Then there is Joel. Its pretty clear that if Joel dies at some point, it is going to have a major impact on Ellie's character. My question is this: If this happens, is it again viewed as another poc killed off to further a white character's arc (if Pedro Pascal is considered a poc in the first place)? If not, then what if they had hired someone with darker skin tone than Pascal to portray Joel?

Also there is no denying that Tess's death was quite tragic, had an impact on Joel and Ellie, and deepened those two character's relationship. Its the whole reason why Joel is protecting Ellie in the first place. However, nobody is accusing the show of "anti-whiteness" because of her death. But what if she had been played by a poc?

All in all, my question is this: When is a poc character's death considered deliberate political decision and when not? White characters just live or die, but what happens to a poc character always somehow becomes a representation of this whole hidden political view of them. Doesn't that threaten to reduce poc characters to nothing more than representations of their skin tone or ethnicity? What does it do to poc actors and their careers, if they cannot take roles in shows where their character might die, without a risk of causing a controversy to their employers?

I may be just an ignorant white girl (and probably so are you since you didn't want to comment with your own account), but sometimes cigar is just a cigar.

// Sorry in advance for any grammar mistakes.

[construingseacats]

Umireread: Legend of the Golden Witch - Chapter 5: Epitaph on the Portrait

Sat, Oct 4 1986 - 1:30PM

The following contains spoilers for the entirety of Umineko. Please do not read if you are yet to finish it.

No particular notes on the new character information introduced in the menu, but it’s neat that we have the full 18 characters here now. I sure hope nothing bad happens to any of them.

We open up this chapter fairly readily with another case of Maria talking about witches being real and the rest of the kids going “yeah, they sure are! :)”. I know it’s only slight in this case, but I do like the constant throughline of the themes of fantasy versus reality. It’s kind of shocking to think about given the scale and scope of the work, alongside the length of time it was released over, but Umineko feels very complete from the start and it feels like almost all the future ideas were planned from the beginning rather than invented partway through writing.

And here we are at the Epitaph! It’s been a long 4 chapters, but we’re finally digging into the real meat of the plot. I’ve bashed early Umineko for not doing enough to keep readers hooked, but I think this is the point where anyone who has made it this far will at least stick around to the first twilight (and that itself is the point that should reel them in for the whole thing).

I honestly can’t get over how funny this all is in hindsight. “Hey Kinzo, how did you get all those gold bars?” “Uhhhhh *looks at dead Italian Soldiers* I summoned a witch using magic”

Lovely bit of irony of the kids being told not to explore the forest because of the witch, but doing so anyway because of the rumours of hidden gold. Although, let’s be real, telling a kid not to do something is usually enough to make them want to do it.

The thought never even crossed my mind during my initial read, but even if it’s never outright said, Maria is definitely written as autistic. This line in particular is a pretty familiar feeling to people who struggle with social cues. I do wonder if Maria is based on any particular kid that Ryukishi encountered during his time as a social worker.

Pretty on the nose to talk about the gold being the value of a human life. I guess killing everyone else on the island is easier to weigh against the gold being worth a hundred humans.

I really like this section here - in a sense, this is kind of fantasy vs reality rearing its head once again. It’s kind of easy to get lost in a story about a mountain of gold and just think about how it means infinite money, but if you peel back the suspension of disbelief, it’s definitely not as convenient as the fantasy you conjure in your head makes it out to be. It seems like a weird comment to make about a series that’s quickly going to dive into witch fights and fantasy skirmishes, but I love the more grounded scenes like this one. It really helps the whole thing feel more real, you know?

I THOUGHT WE WERE FUCKING DONE WITH THIS

Battler Umineko said Beatrice does exist, roll credits

There’s a couple ways to read this - Yasu just flat out telling the truth about Kinzo’s infatuation with Beatrice, her projecting herself onto Beatrice and wishing she was her, or maybe even going as far as to consider Battler as the “Master” in this case and thinking about captivating him as the Beatrice persona. I like this line a lot.

“5 Billion Yen is like a dream” - funny to see the kids talking about money while the adults are tearing each other apart over the same topic.

As for the return to the Adults… Yeah there’s not a lot to say initially, it’s just another round of everyone getting equal time in the spotlight to show off their personalities and the intricacies that make them different from one another.

Ha, that didn’t take long, we’re literally doing a 1:1 comparison over 5 billion yen here.

The full capitals feel so goofy to me here. I know it’s the best approximation of katakana’s emphasis in English, but it just feels off to me. I wonder how the other english translations handle this?

Anyway, we’re finally at the core of the scene - it took a while to get here, and we’re being hit over the head with a hammer at this point, but we’ve finally established that everyone here needs a lot of money, and they need it fast. This is masterful - again, Umineko is directing you into the line of thinking that everyone here now has a motive for the upcoming murders, but actually it’s establishing that everyone here is a valid associate for Yasu. Doubly so because we’ve just established just how ridiculous the metric tons of gold actually are - the adults have a price to commit heinous acts that’s already quite low, and we can exceed it tenfold. God I love this book

Hey wouldn’t it be funny if we worked together and solved the Epitaph? And then they did and everyone died the end

I don’t think you can distil the message of Umineko down to a single thought (except maybe that one steam review saying “Umineko is about how true crime podcasters are the worst group of people who have ever lived”) - but this line here does a very good job of displaying the heart of the story. Umineko is a mystery, but it’s not about peeling back all the misdirection and fantasy to expose how everything happened - that’s how you end up with your Erika Furudos in the world. You don’t “win” by showing off how all the murders were committed and who were the ones responsible for them, you “win” by understanding the point of the fantasy and embracing it.

I made a point in the preamble to this reread that Death of the Author is in effect, and that’s almost entirely focused at Episode 7 - the way Willard solves everything without laying out the explicit details, and the fact that Bernkastel’s tale of Rokkenjima Prime isn’t fully confirmed in red really add up to this narrative that Umineko wants to tell. The Manga going against that, and Ryukishi saying that’s the de facto truth, really undermines the message that the main story wants to tell in my opinion. We’ll have this rant in much more detail once we get to Episode 7 in a few months, but I did want to bring up this sentiment now since it ties directly into what’s being said here. It is not the case that the one who performs the best becomes the victor. The victor performs the best because he has been granted magic.

Hey reader! Make sure you try and solve the Epitaph too, you hear? Don’t just sit back and read without employing any critical thinking! I’m being a little facetious there, but I don’t think that element is entirely unwarranted - this scene is absolutely encouraging the reader to engage with the story beyond just pressing the space bar over and over.

There’s also a sense of comedy here that this is all just Yasu ruminating to herself in Kinzo’s study. Honestly I expect pretty much every Kinzo scene to just be hilarious in hindsight at this point.

I believe this might be the first mention of the servants being furniture from someone who isn’t Yasu. If so, of course Genji is the one to bring it up.

And so we finally arrive at the full Epitaph! It does pain me that it’s just completely untranslatable into English. I wonder if anyone’s had an earnest attempt at localising it and being able to turn it into a different kind of wordplay puzzle that can be solved by western audiences. Either way, it’s not like I can mark something down for being too clever in its original language.

And that’s the end of Week 1 for Umireread! I’m planning on reading the next 6 chapters this week (up to the end of Curtain-rise on Tragedy), but of course it takes a little time to turn my scratch notes into something partially readable, so there’s no guarantee that these will all be out this week.

As an overall “thoughts so far”? Umineko is fine. I do have real concerns about it being unapproachable and turning people off from it, especially for problems that evaporate almost immediately once we really get going with the story. However, even this early on, there’s so much love poured into these characters and the story is already layered with levels of complexity that other media aspire to reach even in their final arcs. That comes at a disservice to people trying to break into Umineko, but hey, I’m sure there’s something to be said there about that. After all, without love, the truth cannot be seen.

[apocalypticavolition]

Let's (re)Read The Eye of the World! Chapter 21: Listen to the Wind

Once again, I feel obliged to warn you lot about the fact that this reread is going to be filled with spoilers for the whole book series, some of which will be completely irrelevant to the chapter at hand if previous entries are any indication. If you're the sort of person who doesn't like this, run away!

This chapter's got Moiraine's staff for the chapter icon, which reflects the fact that she's going to be giving Nynaeve a lot of info this chapter, including about her gimmick with the coins that the boys have already tossed away.

Sunrise creeping across the River Arinelle found its way into the hollow not far from the riverbank where Nynaeve sat with her back against the trunk of a young oak, breathing the deep breath of sleep. Her horse slept, too, head down and legs spraddled in the manner of horses.

It's basically our last new POV of this book, barring a really brief Moiraine bit at the very end. I saw someone else note that we get Perrin and Nynaeve's POVs in this book to supplement Rand's because they're basically having the same arc as him of being forced to leave home while Egwene jumped at the chance to have an adventure (and actually has a good time in her section) and Mat's being corrupted by the dagger. This checks out, though I don't think any of the books to come have the same kind of thematic consistency with their POVs. Even New Spring has the brief Siuan POV.

“They know the smell of who they want,” she told her horse, standing in the hollow, “and it is not me. The Aes Sedai is right, it seems, the Shepherd of the Night swallow her up.”

Don't worry Nynaeve, you'll see her in Shayol Ghul soon enough.

Gotta say though, the fact that the Trollocs didn't even try to eat Nynaeve is borderline out-of-character in my book. Sure, she's not the target, but she's an ally of the target. And anyway, they're hungry bastards and why would Ba'alzy say "leave literally all of the others alone"? I just don't get it.

At intervals she found tracks, plenty of them, but usually her best efforts could not say whether those who made them had been searching or chasing or pursued. Some had been made by boots that could have belonged to humans or Trollocs either one. Others were hoofprints, like goats or oxen; those were Trollocs for sure. But never a clear sign that she could definitely say came from any of those she sought.

Speaking of things I don't get, I refuse to believe that Nynaeve can't Sherlock Holmes her way into identifying everyone's current locations based on a single footprint. I'm much too much of a Nynaeve stan for anything else.

“There was no clear sign of the boys, or any of the others. The tracks are too muddled to tell anything.” In her concealment, Nynaeve smiled; the Warder’s failure was a slight vindication of her own.

Okay I guess I'll allow it, but only because she's still Lan's equal at least.

“Don’t try to evade it. You know what I am saying. If those thousand were here to be sent into the Two Rivers, why were they not? There is only one answer. They were sent only after we crossed the Taren, when it was known that one Myrddraal and a hundred Trollocs were no longer enough. How? How were they sent? If a thousand Trollocs can be brought so far south from the Blight, so quickly, unseen—not to mention being taken off the same way—can ten thousand be sent into the heart of Saldaea, or Arafel, or Shienar? The Borderlands could be overrun in a year.”

I'm so proud of Lan for being one of the few characters in the series for telling an Aes Sedai that he won't accept blatant dodging of topics in conversations. I get why more characters don't try it - they respect Aes Sedai too much or are afraid of having the Power wielded against them - but it's still refreshing.

Lan's worries about these things are rather hilarious in hindsight, because in a year or two the city of Maradon will be completely overrun by hundreds of thousands of Trollocs and the Ways don't seem to be the least bit involved.

The Ways are closed, and there has not been an Aes Sedai powerful enough to Travel since the Time of Madness. Unless one of the Forsaken is loose—the Light send it is not so, yet or ever—there is still no one who can. In any case, I do not think all the Forsaken together could move a thousand Trollocs.

So Moiraine is just wrong across the board here. The Ways aren't closed, plenty of Aes Sedai are powerful enough to Travel, the Forsaken are loose, the Forsaken together could easily move numbers of Trollocs well beyond a thousand, but they wouldn't use Traveling to do it because that kills the Trolloc.

Lan had spun to face the tree as soon as Moiraine’s eyes moved; his sword was in his hand before she finished speaking Nynaeve’s name. Now he sheathed it again with more force than was strictly necessary.

*waggles eyebrows*

How do you think I knew you were behind that tree? If I had not been distracted, I would have known the moment you came close.

I warned you about getting distracted, Moiraine. You're lucky Lan's still alive!

That said, it's interesting that the senses aren't perfect. Moiraine didn't ping on Nynaeve immediately in Emond's Field for example, and she wasn't distracted then.

She licked lips gone abruptly dry. They were both looking at her, the Warder’s face as unreadable as a stone, the Aes Sedai’s sympathetic yet intent.

Has Moiraine had "the talk" with many sparkers over the past twenty years? Is she just sympathetic because she's technically a Wilder herself? How much of her talk of Nynaeve's denial is something she went through in between sparking and telling Laman's Aes Sedai about her gift? Why did we get a prequel novel that told me nothing about Moiraine's court days, which are fucking fascinating by virtue of involving Cairhienin scheming and being almost completely unknown to us?

You felt nothing special at the time, but a week or ten days later you had your first reaction to touching the True Source.

Moiraine, people in your era measure weeks in sets of ten days so your statement is very redundant! (This particular detail Jordan doesn't seem to come up with until very late, Crossroads of Twilight was the first glossary I saw use it after a cursory and haphazard skimming), so frankly it's not even early book weirdness, it's anticipating late book weirdness.

Also note that Rand did seven days for his first onscreen channeling, so Jordan probably figured it was his first use of the Power and thus his feeling the Fade in chapter one was something he didn't need the power for.

You used the Power to Heal either Perrin or Egwene at some time. An affinity develops. You can sense the presence of someone you have Healed. 

This though, this is early book weirdness and will never come up again. I wonder why Jordan included it and what circumstances he thought it might be useful for later. Frankly, I'm glad to see it gone.

Aes Sedai search for girls who can touch the True Source unguided just as assiduously as we search for men who can do so.

Maybe on average this is true (in that the generic Aes Sedai puts 0 effort into either), but frankly the Red Ajah puts way more effort into the male hunt than anyone puts into the gal hunt. I guess speaking of early book weirdness, you really get the impression in this book that the White Tower is supposed to be actually kind of competent? Borderlanders respect Aes Sedai, which would make more sense if the Green Ajah did anything. Wisdoms are back country professions, which would make more sense if the Yellow Ajah had a presence in more urban areas. Moiraine's broad education feels like Tower training, which would reflect well on the Brown. And so on and so forth.

Mistress Barran’s first apprentice had died the way the Aes Sedai said when Nynaeve was still playing with dolls, and there had been a young woman in Deven Ride only a few years ago. She had been a Wisdom’s apprentice, too, one who could listen to the wind.

This is good foreshadowing for the later revelations that the Two Rivers is a hotspot for channeling. And since Moiraine said three in four die, and we've got four gals with these two examples, we can see that Egwene is statistically dead meat if she doesn't get to the Tower soon.

She doesn’t want me along. She’s trying to put my back up so I’ll go back home and leave them alone with her. “Oh, yes, I will be going with you. You cannot keep me from it.” “No one will try to keep you from it,” Lan said as he rejoined them. He emptied the tea kettle over the fire and stirred the ashes with a stick. “A part of the Pattern?” he said to Moiraine.

Nynaeve is hilariously weak to Moiraine's reverse psychology. She'd shout "Duck season!" and shoot herself in the face if Moiraine wanted her to. Meanwhile, Lan's just going, "Yesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyes" but trying to play it cool. "Please say she can come," is what "A part of the Pattern?" means.

 “He is only a few miles from us. But I cannot afford to take the time. He should make his way down to Whitebridge safely now that the Trollocs have gone. The two who went downriver may need me more. They have lost their coins, and Myrddraal are either pursuing them or else trying to intercept us all at Whitebridge.”

"A few miles" being too much of a detour at this point is just weird to me. I think the Pattern's keeping her tunnel visiony so that she doesn't interfere with anyone's needed development, but still. There's no reason to think that the brief detour for the isolated boy isn't worth it with the stakes being what they are. This is where being calculated breaks down: once you start using bad assumptions and equations to choose your actions, you're going to start spiraling out of control quickly.

Light, a Wisdom is supposed to look after all of her people. Why do I have to choose like this?

Because you're not supposed to be a Wisdom anymore, Nynaeve. Like Rand, she's heavily in denial.

It would have been a small boost to her spirits if there had been even a trace of gloating on his face instead of that insufferable stony calm. His eyes widened when he saw her face, and she turned her back on him to wipe tears from her cheeks. How dare he mock my crying!

Nynaeve can be just as unreliable a narrator as Mat because of her assumptions about everyone. Lan's incredibly stoic, so his being shocked at coming back to Nynaeve in tears under these circumstances suggests that either she's a huge mess right now or he really cares about her emotional well-being already. Or both.

The Aes Sedai was so confident in her power and her plans, she thought, but if they did not find Egwene and the boys, all of them, alive and unharmed, not all of her power would protect her. Not all her Power. I can use it, woman! You told me so yourself. I can use it against you!

I know why it didn't happen, but I am a little disappointed that Nynaeve never got to throw down with Moiraine like she wanted. It would have been epic. Ah well, there's always fanfic.

[ryttu3k]

Some speculation on plot elements. Spoilers for the game introduction, the points of interest around Kakariko, the stuff you learn at New Serenne Stables, and the beginning of the first mission (as far as I'm up to), as well as the third trailer.

Edit: Now includes spoilers up to the fourth [redacted] from the quests tarted at New Serenne, and the full Rito quest.

So it looks like the Sages are going to be a big element? I've now explored the four Ring Ruins around Kakariko that are actually accessible, and we know a bit about them now. The special stones, for instance, are likely going to be the titular Tears (the magatama things). The next question is, who will the Sages be?

One of the tablets mentions a few elements: "Wind, flame, water, lightning… and time… Light…" Since there's bits of grammar missing, we can't actually state definitively whether Time and Light are grouped with them, or, more interestingly, if there's a missing seventh element (based on the fact that Zelda lore basically always uses seven, and the fact that the mural in the introduction did show seven Tears!) The first few sages, too, easy enough to work out - the trailer and the four locations mentioned on the map all but confirm that the new sages of Wind, Flame, Water, and Lightning will be Tulin, Yunobo, Sidon, and Riju.

So, who represents Light and who represents Time? And what's the last one? Others used in the series include Forest, Spirit, and Shadow (Ocarina), and Earth (Wind Waker).

Rauru was almost certainly a Sage - it was his arm holding Ganondorf down, and his Tear that Zelda picked up. He could have been Light, like his namesake (…or vice versa), or he could have been Time, or alternatively he was Light and the Tear was non-specific and became affiliated with Time when Zelda picked it up. It's heavily inspired that Zelda in Ocarina is the Sage of Time (she's never given a title, but all her artefacts and powers are largely Time-based), so BotW/TotK!Zelda might have inherited that - and either way, she is the one to teach Link the time-based power of Recall. Either way, the Tear pulled Zelda back into the past, so it was either the Tear itself being Time-affiliated (meaning Rauru was the former Sage of Time), or Zelda herself being Time-affiliated and the Tears being neutral until picked up by a Sage.

Also relating to Zelda, Rauru, and Time - she's been yeeted back to the past. She might help establish the Sages? Man I need to find more geoglyphs. So I guess the question is more, was Rauru Time or Light? If Light, would he need a new successor? (Could that actually be Link? He does have 'the sword that seals the darkness', after all even if the Blade of Evil's Bane is an objectively cooler name.) If Time, then Zelda would be his successor.

For other candidates, working out what the last element is would help. Spirit probably wouldn't be present, since the Gerudo are now represented by Lightning. Forest… might be Hestu, haha. I don't actually think that's likely, given that story-wise, I would have included A Phenomenon around the forest too, to indicate that, so the last one would probably be a bigger deal plot-wise. Earth is unlikely as the two known Sages of Earth were Laruto and Medli, and Zora and Rito are already represented. Shadow, I would think, is my best bet, and a nice opposite to Light; in that case, it'd likely be a Sheikah. There's a ton of options here, although I'd say one of the more interesting options would be Josha, the young genius in charge of the Depths, which would draw the Depths into more plot significance other than 'there's lots of Gloom here'.

As for Ganondorf's involvement, the murals show him stealing a Tear, and he has it embedded in his headpiece. I have a feeling that after the first four, the second half of the game will involve the more mysterious three Sages, or at least two mysterious Sages, with the last one (Zelda, perhaps) needing to get her own Tear (instead of Rauru's old one) back from Ganondorf in able to unlock her true Sage abilities.

An interesting possible angle: Ganondorf was meant to be a Sage. The Tear was his all along. The other Sages disagreed (his connection with Rauru seems to be personal), that's what has caused all these issues. On the other hand, any possible connection between Rauru and Ganondorf is, um, problematic timeline-wise, given that Rauru is meant to be the first king of Hyrule and the Ganondorf from the continuity we know comes from well and truly after… unless this is the very earliest incarnation of Ganondorf and the others just come later? Like he's reborn as the one in OoT, timeline splits and goes on from there… honestly, where the hell does BotW/TotK come in the timeline, anyway? XD;;

And to conclude, MusicBee just started playing OoT's Chamber of Sages. Good timing.

(Needless to say, I'm just speculating here. Please don't spoil me for anything, I'm not very far into the game!)

Edit: Have now done the Wind Temple and found the next three geoglyphs, and we have some more answers!

Zelda in the past was explicitly the Sage of Time. May carry that through. Sonia and Mineru both confirm that Zelda carries both Sonia's Time power and Rauru's Light power; in the flashback the former Sage of Wind shows, we see seven figures that don't include Sonia. It's Rauru in front, Mineru and Zelda a bit behind, and then a Goron, the Rito, a Zora, and a woman who… may be Sonia but may not be, her skin is quite dark and I suspect she's the Gerudo.

So, if Sonia was the original Sage of Time, she may have passed the title on to Zelda for… reasons. Either something happens to her, or she passes it on for other reasons. Maybe pregnancy? We know she and Rauru have to have at least one child for, well, Zelda to exist, and if they don't have any kids already, she would need to at least be pregnant before Rauru dies. (Which, honestly, is just sad. He never gets to meet his own child!)

Mineru's title hasn't been revealed yet, but given that she described herself as being able to separate her spirit from her body, I'm guessing Sage of Spirit? I wonder who her successor will be? A Sheikah would be good representation. The four at the back we know. Zelda will likely carry on being the Sage of Time. Rauru now needs a successor, too. Maybe Link could carry Light as well as Rauru's arm?

An interesting note - Zelda and Rauru's stones are a paradox. Rauru's stone is in his hand. His arm binds Ganondorf in place. The stone comes off and releases Ganondorf. Zelda picks up the stone and winds up in the past, meeting Rauru - who still has his stone. But it's the same stone. It's technically not a closed paradox, since Rauru already has it, but it does mean he absolutely has to sacrifice himself / lose his arm in order for Zelda to eventually get it.

[xenoblademisadventures]

Ok, I reached the point where the entire party gets access to mechs. I'm enjoying the game so far. I wanna go back to the desert since I rushed the exploration a little (because I wanted to get more access to the game's mechanics). Anyways, so far the plot's left me with a million questions, I'm going to list them. Pls don't spoilers. I expect some of these questions to go unanswered and others to be related to plot twists.

1. Where did the names "Agnus" and "Keves" come from? Like, in-universe. Alrest already had a name to describe all of its countries and while Bionis/Mechonis didn't, I assume some compromise between those two names would exist.

2. How tf did Melia and Nia get into power? With Melia's case, she ended the series as queen of the bird ppl, but there were never any ambitions to govern anyone else. In Nia's case, she was at best the former Blade of the former mayor of Torigoth, which would put even Pandoria and Brighid in more valid places than her to take the throne of all of Alrest.

3. So, why are Melia and Nia acting antithetical to the themes of both of their games? 1 had a lot about ppl chosing their own fate and 2 had a lot about passing the torch between generations. I assume there will be an explanation.

4. So, everyone in the party is based off someone Melia or Nia knew. The Keves gang share personality traits with the 1 gang while the Agnus gang shares visual similarities with characters from 2. Are they, like, reincarnations or something? I assume there's a particular reason for this, especially with Eunie getting a flashback from Melia's life.

5. How tf did Melia give birth to Machina (but Nopon are incompatable)?

6. I was under the assumption that Blades were infertile, so how the tf did Nia give birth to anyone?

7. How much time passed exactly? The oldest bird person in 1 was 300 and Melia was 88, she doesn't appear that old in 3, so I'm guessing 100 years approximately. Especially if the average lifespan is, like, 7 or something, that's good enough for a multi-generational conflict.

8. How do the Alphabet Soup Power Rangers fit into this exactly? Where did they come from? I assume they're also working with Agnus. Why are Melia and Nia working with them?

9. So, are we going to be reintroduced to old characters other than Melia and Nia later down the line. Like, from 1, all of the High Entia and Machina should still be there while all the Blades from 2 should still be alive. Are they going to show up in The City tm? If 3 takes place less than 100 years later, that would give child characters like Juju, Rex, and Tora a chance of returning. I hope Juju returns as the final boss. I said this about 2 and I'll say it again about 3. Juju final boss prediction.

10. I wanna know what happened to the Aegises. I mostly just want to see the 3 designers fix Pyra's character design.

11. Since when was green hair introduced to Keves's genetic pool?

12. How did Agnus get access to mechs? The Keves mechs are obviously mechon, but 2 didn't have any mech titans.

13. What happened to the Blade Cycle? Do Blades still turn into titans? My guess is that maybe they don't resonate in the new world, but the first thing we see happen there is Rex reawakening Pyra and Mythra.

14. What's Alvis been up to? This doesn't look like what either he or Shulk intended. War isn't very "hand in hand." Also, even if he knew about Alrest, I can only assume he was not expecting for Alrest and Bionis to be recreated at the exact same time.

15. I'm getting some birth visuals from the game so far. There are the test tube babies, but the mechs come from Egg. I hope the characters have to react to a live birth later in the game lmao.

16. All of the Agnus characters appear to be based on Blades and all the Keves characters would be ether based. From what I can tell, the Flame Clocks are collecting ether from corpses to power new life. Effectively meaning everyone is reincarnating repeatedly and rapidly while being harvested for their energy. Not too differently from Zanza's system in 1. A similar death and rebirth system exists in 2 and Amalthus uses it to harvest energy. So, what about the Alrest human characters? They aren't tied to a cycle or ether, so what are they up to?

17. So Noah can just summon the Lucky Seven? Also I already forgot the origin explained, but is it the fucking True Monado or something? I think it's the Monado.

18. The Ouroboroses kinda look like the Ghosts in X. Is X going to be part of this hodgepodge?

19. Why do the mechs have titties?

20. The Moebius theme slaps so fucking hard. Not a question. Simply a fact.

[sgpsketch]

Sketchtember Day 20: (interstitial)

This is the most spoiler I've ever spoiled (so FAR), so if you don't want to be spoiled... shoulda read my book a while ago, huh?

...

I like this sketch the best despite it taking more effort, not the least reason being the chapter is my "Millennium series finale X-Files episode." The whole reason the chapter exists is the "group" has to split up, and while I was there, I figured I'd wrap up some threads. Or, I guess not really "wrap up" so much as make a nice little bow at the end that suggests something nice, which it may as well since it doesn't matter later. Sort of.

You should maybe read the book =p

"Wait, is this canon?" Sure is! It's a blunt mallet of foreshadowing of what happens later. It's my Catherine, I guess, if you've played/watched the game all the way through to see where they are.

"I don't get it" Well, if you haven't read the book, I can't help you there =p

"I did read it!" ...oh. Well. Okay, you know how some IRL contemporary countries have super advanced tech and others are all grass huts and whatever? Same thing here.

"That's stupid." Look, I just didn't want to write the same old "high fantasy" story that I've long ago gotten tired of reading, so that's what I came up with to differentiate mine. I wrote the story I wanted to read. If you don't like it, you can write your own—free country (I assume, based on the fact you can read this post).

[dilirebas]

What dramas are you watching right now?

I haven't been particularly interested in any recent dramas so I'm mostly just waiting for other dramas to air. BUT, The Ingenious One finally starts airing today, so this is definitely the drama that I'll be watching next.

Here are some things that I've watched recently:

B for Busy - This is considered one of the best Chinese films of recent years. I just watched it for the first time and I did enjoy it. Most of the dialogue is in Shanghainese, so give this movie a try if you're curious about what the dialect sounds like.

Lust, Caution - A heartbreaking classic. I never get sick of watching Tang Wei and Tony Leung. (I guess you can also hear some Shanghainese in this film lol..)

Oh No! Here Comes Trouble - I've only seen the first episode and I'm still not 100% sure what this drama is going to be about (I've been avoiding spoilers LOL). It seems like an interesting and well-shot drama but I need to see more of it to decide how I feel.

Succession Season 4 - So far, I think this is a phenomenal season. I know people really liked episode 3 but I actually found episodes 4 and 5 more compelling. Haven't seen episode 6 yet. If you're on the fence about watching Succession, I strongly recommend giving it a try (starting from Season 1, of course). The hype is justified.

Cunk on Earth / Cunk on Britain - This series is so funny, you guys! I know so many people who loved it and I'm so glad I'm finally watching it too. I just finished Cunk on Earth and started Cunk on Britain, but you can start with either one. I think Cunk on Earth has a wider appeal but Cunk on Britain is even funnier if you know enough British history to catch some of the subtler jokes.

Women Talking - Honestly, this film didn't live up to my expectations. I think it takes a horrible situation and gives it an ending that's too fluffy and optimistic. If you look at the actual events that the film is based on, there's no happy ending.

Provoke - I don't usually watch micro dramas, but I really liked this one! Major kudos to the director and the cast.

[be-gay-do-heists]

hello yall :) the holy month of elul started last night, which is typically a time for contemplation, so since it is impossible for me to stop thinking about leverage, i decided to write an essay. hope anyone interested in reading it enjoys, and that it makes at least a little sense!! spoilers for leverage redemption

-----

Leverage, Judaism, and “Doing the Work”: An Essay for Elul

When it comes to Elul and the approaching High Holidays, Leverage might seem like an odd topic to meditate on.

The TNT crime drama that ran from 2008-2012, and which released a new season this summer following its renewal, centers on a group of found-family thieves who help the victims of corporations and oligarchs (sometimes based on real-world examples), using wacky heists and cons to bring down the rich and powerful. In one episode, the team’s clients want to reclaim their father’s prized Glimt piece that had been stolen in the Shoah and never returned, but aside from this and the throwaway lines and jokes standard for most mainstream television, there’s not a ton textually Jewish about Leverage. However, despite this, I have found that the show has strong resonance among Jewish fans, and lots of potential for analysis along Jewish themes. This tends to focus on one character in particular: the group’s brilliant, pop culture-savvy, and personable hacker, Alec Hardison, played by the phenomenally talented Aldis Hodge.

I can’t remember when or where I first encountered a reading of Hardison as Jewish, but not only is this a somewhat popular interpretation, it doesn’t feel like that much of a leap. In the show itself, Hardison has a couple of the aforementioned throwaway lines that potentially point to him being Jewish, even if they’re only in service of that moment’s grift. It’s hard to point to what exactly makes reading Hardison as Jewish feel so natural. My first guess is the easy way Hardison fits into the traditional paradigms of Jewish masculinity explored by scholars such as Daniel Boyarin (2). Most of the time, the hacker is not portrayed as athletic or physical; he is usually the foil to the team’s more physically-adept characters like fighter Eliot, or thief Parker. Indeed, Hardison’s strength is mental, expressed not only through his computer wizardry but his passions for science, technology, music, popular media, as well as his studious research into whatever scenario the group might come up against. In spite of his self-identification as a “geek,” Hardison is nevertheless confident, emotionally sensitive, and secure in his masculinity. I would argue he is representative of the traditional Jewish masculine ideal, originating in the rabbinic period and solidified in medieval Europe, of the dedicated and thoughtful scholar (3). Another reason for popular readings of Hardison as Jewish may be the desire for more representation of Jews of color. Although mainstream American Jewish institutions are beginning to recognize the incredible diversity of Jews in the United States (4), and popular figures such as Tiffany Haddish are amplifying the experiences of non-white Jews, it is still difficult to find Jews of color represented in popular media. For those eager to see this kind of representation, then, interpreting Hardison, a black man who places himself tangential to Jewishness, in this way is a tempting avenue.

Regardless, all of the above remains fan interpretation, and there was little in the text of the show that seriously tied Judaism into Hardison’s identity. At least, until we got this beautiful speech from Hardison in the very first episode of the renewed show, directed at the character of Harry Wilson, a former corporate lawyer looking to atone for the injustice he was partner to throughout his career:

“In the Jewish faith, repentance, redemption, is a process. You can’t make restitution and then promise to change. You have to change first. Do the work, Harry. Then and only then can you begin to ask for forgiveness. [...] So this… this isn’t the win. It’s the start, Harry.”

I was floored to hear this speech, and thrilled that it explained the reboot’s title, Leverage: Redemption. Although not mentioned by its Hebrew name, teshuvah forms the whole basis for the new season. Teshuvah is the concept of repentance or atonement for the sins one has committed. Stemming from the root shuv/shuva, it carries the literal sense of “return.” In a spiritual context, this usually means a return to G-d, of finding one’s way back to holiness and by extension good favor in the eyes of the Divine. But equally important is restoring one’s relationships with fellow humans by repairing any hurt one has caused over the past year. This is of special significance in the holy month of Elul, leading into Rosh haShanah, the Yamim Noraim, and Yom Kippur, but one can undertake a journey of redemption at any point in time. That teshuvah is a journey is a vital message for Harry to hear; one job, one reparative act isn’t enough to overturn years of being on the wrong side of justice, to his chagrin. As the season progresses, we get to watch his path of teshuvah unfold, with all its frustrations and consequences. Harry grows into his role as a fixer, not only someone who can find jobs and marks for the team, but fixes what he has broken or harmed.

So why was Hardison the one to make this speech?

I do maintain that it does provide a stronger textual basis for reading Hardison as Jewish by implication (though the brief on-screen explanation for why he knows about teshuvah, that his foster-parent Nana raised a multi-faith household, is important in its own merit, and meshes well with his character traits of empathy and understanding for diverse experiences). However, beyond this, Hardison isn’t exactly an archetypical model for teshuvah. In the original series, he was the youngest character of the main ensemble, a hacking prodigy in the start of his adult career, with few mistakes or slights against others under his belt. In one flashback we see that his possibly first crime was stealing from the Bank of Iceland to pay off his Nana’s medical bills, and that his other early hacking exploits were in the service of fulfilling personal desires, with only those who could afford to pay the bill as targets. Indeed, in the middle of his speech, Hardison points to Eliot, the character with the most violent and gritty past who views his work with the Leverage team as atonement, for a prime example of ongoing teshuvah. So while no one is perfect and everyone has a reason for doing teshuvah, this question of why Hardison is the one to give this series-defining speech inspired me to look at his character choices and behavior, and see how they resonate with a different but interrelated Jewish principle, that of tikkun olam. 

Tikkun olam is literally translated as “repairing the world,” and can take many different forms, such as protecting the rights of vulnerable people in society, or giving tzedakah (5). In modern times, tikkun olam is often the rallying cry for Jewish social activists, particularly among environmentalists for whom literally restoring the health of the natural world is the key goal. Teshuvah and tikkun olam are intertwined (the former is the latter performed at an interpersonal level) and both hold a sense of fixing or repairing, but tikkun olam really revolves around a person feeling called to address an injustice that they may have not had a personal hand in creating. Hardison’s sense of a universal scale of justice which he has the power to help right on a global level and his newfound drive to do humanitarian work, picked up sometime after the end of the original series, make tikkun olam a central value for his character. This is why we get this nice bit of dialogue from Eliot to Hardison in the second episode of the reboot, when the latter’s outside efforts to organize international aid start distracting him from his work with the team: “Is [humanitarian work] a side gig? In our line of work, you’re one of the best. But in that line of work… you’re the only one, man.” The character who most exemplifies teshuvah reminds Hardison of his amazing ability to effect change for the better on a huge stage, to do some effective tikkun olam. It’s this acknowledgement of where Hardison can do the most good that prompts the character’s absence for the remainder of the episodes released thus far, turning his side gig into his main gig.

With this in mind, it will be interesting to see where Hardison’s arc for this season goes. Separated from the rest of the team, the hacker still has remarkable power to change the world, because it is, after all, the “age of the geek.” However, he is still one person. For all that both teshuvah and tikkun olam are individual responsibilities and require individual decision-making and effort, the latter especially relies on collective work to actually make things happen. Hardison leaving is better than trying to do humanitarian work and Leverage at the same time, but there’s only so long he can be the “only one” in the field before burning out. I’m reminded of one of the most famous (for good reason) maxims in Judaism:

It is not your duty to finish the work, but neither are you free to neglect it. (6)

Elul is traditionally a time for introspection and heeding the calls to repentance. After a year where it’s never been easier to feel powerless and drained by everything going on around us, I think it’s worth taking the time to examine what kind of work we are capable of in our own lives. Maybe it’s fixing the very recent and tangible hurts we’ve left behind, like Harry. Maybe it’s the little changes for the better that we make every day, motivated by our sense of responsibility, like Eliot. And maybe it’s the grueling challenge of major social change, like Hardison. And if any of this work gets too much, who can we fall back on for support and healing? Determining what needs repair, working on our own scale and where our efforts are most helpful, and thereby contributing to justice in realistic ways means that we can start the new year fresh, having contemplated in holiday fashion how we can be better agents in the world.

Shana tovah u’metukah and ketivah tovah to all (7), and may the work we do in the coming year be for good!

------

(1) Disclaimer: everybody’s fandom experiences are different, and this is just what I’ve picked up on in my short time watching and enjoying this show with others.

(2) See, for example, the introduction and first chapter of Boyarin’s book Unheroic Conduct: The Rise of Heterosexuality and the Invention of the Jewish Man (I especially recommend at least this portion if you are interested in queer theory and Judaic studies). There he explores the development of Jewish masculinity in direct opposition to Christian masculine standards.

(3) I might even go so far as to place Hardison well within the Jewish masculine ideal of Edelkayt, gentle and studious nobility (although I would hesitate to call him timid, another trait associated with Edelkayt). Boyarin explains that this scholarly, non-athletic model of man did not carry negative associations in the historical Jewish mindset, but was rather the height of attractiveness (Boyarin, 2, 51).

(4) Jews of color make up 20% of American Jews, according to statistics from Be’chol Lashon, and this number is projected to increase as American demographics continue to change: https://globaljews.org/about/mission/. 

(5) Tzedakah is commonly known as righteous charity. According to traditional authority Maimonides, it should be given anonymously and without embarrassment to the person in need, generous, and designed to help the recipient become self-sufficient.

(6) Rabbi Tarfon, Pirkei Avot, 2:16

(7) “A good and sweet year” and “a good inscription [in the Book of Life]”

[gyllenhaalstories]

CHAMPAGNE PROBLEMS — SUGAR DADDY!ZEMO

summary: a series of unfortunate (or fortunate, depending whose side you’re on) events brought you to mandripoor seven years ago. it was fun, dangerous and exciting for the most part. a lot has changed, but you are back in high town in the hope of purchasing a rare monet painting, and reuniting with an old flame.

warnings: tfatws spoilers, alcohol, established sugar daddy x sugar baby relationship, smut (daddy kink, dom/sub/switch dynamics, choking, hair pulling, blowjob, fingering, both degradation and praise kinks, spit kink, cum play, marking, unprotected sex). 18+ MINORS DON’T INTERACT.

word count: 2685

gif credit: pedropcl

notes: this (very long) fic is brought to you by zemo’s #1 hoe. for the sake of the fic, zemo’s daughter and wife have never existed. i get it zemo is the bad guy daniel is not your typical hottie but let me live my fantasy and reclaim my crown as the original zemo fan. listen to off to the races by lana del rey and let no man steal your thyme by the pentangle if you want to fibe with me! i hope you guys will enjoy it!!! <3

“If you keep staring at me like this, I’ll mistake you for the Mona Lisa.” You took the last sip from your glass, which was immediately filled by the man standing behind you. You had felt his familiar presence a long time ago, but you were too mesmerized by the rare painting trapped in a cage of glass to bother notifying him. “Your glance has followed me around the room. In other circumstances, I’d find it creepy. Now, it’s just very flattering.”

You heard him laugh through his nose. You saw his reflecting in the glass, lit up by flashing blue and pink lights and vibrating ever so slightly to the sound of the loud music.

“You’re like a Monet painting. From afar, you are clear as cristal and easy to read like an open book. From up close...” You marked a pause and stoodby straight. Your eyes never leaving the work of art you had been scrutinizing for the past hour. Water Lilies in Bloom, it was called, an incorrect translation that always brought a grin to your lips. “You are a mystery.” You swallowed thickly the bubbly liquid, recognizing the peculiar taste of champagne.

“It is arrogant but right to think of myself as the pure definition of mysterious.”

You chuckled, throwing your head back in disbelief. Some things never changed.

“After all these years... I managed to find my way back to you. Now that’s a mystery.”

You turned on your heels as you spoke. “Is it, though? Tell me, Daddy. Is it really that hard to believe you’d recognize your property even after all these years. I heard they put you in a pretty little cage. Didn’t have much else to think about than what you missed most?”

He took you in, just how ethereal you looked under the colourful neon lights. You had your arms pressed against your chest, the shiny material of your matching bracelet and necklace twinkled. He squinted slightly, his lips curled into a smirk while he looked down your body, the one thing that kept him sane after all these years in jail (that and the thought of destroying symbols like super soldiers and make the world a better place once and for all). “Nice dress.”

“My Sugar Daddy got it for me.” You did a twirl, showing off your outfit innocently. “You like it?”

He reached up to his neck and pulled on the collar of his purple sweater, like it was a tie he could loosen up. “So you received everything I sent you.”

You clicked your tongue. “Not everything...” Your head turned to look behind you, where your most priced possession was glowing in its full glory — soon to-be yours, you should say.

“Use your words, Princess. Say it and it’s yours.”

It was your turn to analyze him, to take every ounce of cockiness and pride. “You’re playing with fire.” You walked closer to him, erasing the distance but increasing the tension between the two of you. “All the money in the world won’t get you everything you want.”

He was quick to move, his soldiers instincts never left his body, clearly. His delicate hand wrapped around your throat so effortlessly. It tightened, forcing you to manage your breathing. “Money got me everything I wanted already.”

“What is it, Daddy? What is it that you want so badly?” You clenched your jaw, holding his glance which was filled with lust, instead of rage and grudges.

“You never looked so beautiful.” He leaned closer too, whispering the words to your ear. It was liked the loud club music turned into white noise. He could not care less about the stares and the words strangers exchanged as they witnessed the scene. High Town was not his playground.

But you were his plaything.

*~*~*

History repeated itself, in one way or another. Icons rose and fell. Symbols mattered and vanished into oblivion. Originality turned into plagiarism. Winners would lose it all, losers would dig their graves deeper into the abyss.

History repeated itself. The sight before your eyes was the same one as seven years ago, when all that was on this man’s life before meeting you was this stupid Mission Report of December 16 1991. You met him at a party like this, in High Town before he was banned from the land. He caught your attention doing his ridiculous dance moves, sharing his knowledge about the art pieces showcased around the room. Then he brought you to a hotel, the ones so fancy they had multiple rooms and a vintage record player as part of the decor. Only, it worked, and he put on his favourite Édith Piaf records. Rien de Rien, Le Petit Homme, La Vie en Rose, song after song, you were diving deeper in your memories.. He was popping yet another bottle of champagne open and pouring some in flutes you would never touch for the rest of the night. The same night, seven years ago, it changed your life. At the second you regretted setting foot in Mandripoor, he changed your mind and gave you the best months of your life. You would ride around Europe in vintage cars, dine in gigantic mansions you called castles. You admired the old paintings of his royal family members while he brought you a silk bathrobe to change into after a steamy shower.

You’d get lost in your thoughts, he’d get lost in his ambitions. You two were one and the same, in one way or another. That affirmation sent shivers down your spine. You could not tell if it was a good or a bad thing, a shy voice in your head was reassuring you it was the former.

“They call me Baron again, I guess I’m not doing too bad after all.” His voice snapped you back to reality. He was still wearing that obnoxious trench coat. You hated it, it made him look like a pimp. Although that was not too far from the truth, as the mountain of luxurious jewelry and clothes in your closet proved.

“Do you like being back here?”

“I love it here.” The emphasis on the last word was audible. You nodded in agreement. This place was heaven on Earth for some people, hell for others. For both you and Zemo, it was somewhere in between.

“You’re certainly not here for me.” You laughed, setting the still full glass on the nightstand.

He shook his head, mouthing a negative response.

“What is it, this time? Mission report February 32?”

“Something like that.” He answered, after another silent laugh.

“If only you had made me your mission, your life would have been easier.”

“Yours would have been, too.”

You shrugged. You agreed, but you did not need to say it. He knew. The two of you knew that this warmth washing over your bodies was the answer to all of your problems. Yet, you were fighting the urge to surrender and give in.

History always repeated itself.

All it took was for him to set his hand on your exposed knee. You got flashbacks of the numerous times his hand rested there while you two drove deeper in the country side, in some old Chevrolet, Ford, or any other European brands he could find and buy.

“Say it, Princess. Tell me what you want and I’ll give it to you.”

You swallowed thickly and fell on your knees. He sat straight, as straight as he could on the comfortable mattress, and spread his legs wider. “I want to go back in time.”

He leaned foward and you opened your mouth, your tongue poking out. He spit in your mouth, and you swallowed. The giggle that followed your actions sent blood to his hardening cock. “Just as eager as I remembered, right? You’d do anything to please me.”

“I’d do anything for you, Daddy.” You repeated, the confession left you breathless.

“That’s my good girl.” He brushed your hair with so much tenderness for a moment, you let out a content moan. He changed the mood real quick when he pushed your head closer to his crotch and unbuckled his belt at lightning’s speed.

Your mouth was watering at the sight, a sight that was tattooed in your memory forever. Whatever relationship you two had went beyond fancy presents and sex, it was a connection that tickled your souls and left you a different woman than when it first started. You wasted no time, stroking him a few times as you spit on his blushing tip. You smeared the spit over his sensitive spot and pulled the sweetest moans out of him, which grew louder and more intense when you finally wrapped your lips around his head.

No one compared to you, to your attention to details, to the way you were taking him all in, inches by inches like you were made for his cock and his cock only. No one compared to how blissful you looked pulling back, choking on your own saliva and the lack of oxygen. “You look so beautiful, Babygirl.”

His praise made you bat your eyes, hoping to receive more compliments. You flattened your tongue, licking him from the base to the top before you deep throated his cock again. You never left him untouched, your hands were massaging his walls or exploring his thick thighs while your mouth almost brought him to the edge.

That was when he pulled on your hair and demanded you went back up on your feet. “I bet you’re soaked. All you need is to see a cock to wet your panties.” You nodded as one hand reached up to cup your face, the other to cup your core from under your dress. He could felt the ever growing wet patch. He discarded of your panties in one effortless pull and pressed his pointer and middle fingers against your sensitive clit. He circled it, studying your reaction.

“Daddy...” You breathed out. “I need you.”

“I’m proud of you for using your words,” his finger slipped inside of your entrance, you moaned out his name. “So greedy and needy and easy for me, like the good whore that you are. Is that right? You’re Daddy’s perfect little whore?”

He was two fingers in, all the way to the last knuckles. He pumped in and out of you slowly yet roughly. You smirked when he finally touched that spongy spot inside of you. “I’m Daddy’s. I’ll always belong to Daddy.”

“That’s right.”

He brushed his thumb over your clit, his fingers stopped fucking your hole to abuse the bundle of nerves until tears started to pool in your eyes.

“Be a good baby.” You looked at him with doe eyes, sucking his thumb between your plump lips. “Do what I want.”

And you reached your high. You had nothing to hold you up, except for your shaky legs that threatened to give in under your weight and the intensity of your orgasm. You sucked on his thumb harder, hoping to quiet some of your moans but your screams escaped your parted lips.

In a blink of an eye, you were pushed against the bed and bounced against the body that blocked your every movement. His pants were nowhere to be found, just like the rest of your respective clothes. Your finger tips brushed over the skin of his shaven cheeks, down to his neck and chest. The intimacy, you had craved it all these years.

“I bet that sweet cunt of yours missed my cock.” He spoke, chuckling mockingly when he pushed himself in your stretched hole. You both let out a long moan of satisfaction. He rested inside of you, adjusting to your warmth and tightness. “I was right.”

“You’re always right.” You flattered his ego, and earned a sloppy kiss in return.

His lips moved down to your neck where he sucked hickeys and left small bite marks as he picked up the pace of his hips.

You wrapped your legs around his waist, hoping to bring him that much closer, and deeper, into you.

Zemo pinned your wrists above your head and pumped his cock inside of your tight pussy like his life depended on it. “So fucking wet for me,  gonna make me cum, Baby.” He had tried so hard to hold back, not to mark you and claim you again.

“Wait for me.” You begged him, and he brought one hand down to your neck again. He squeezed it, choking you deliciously until your eyes rolled inwards. He tightened his grip ever so slightly and he felt it, he felt the way your walls fluttered around him.

He thrusted inside of you, his hips snapped against yours and the sound of your skin slapping echoed in the bedroom. “Cum for me, Princess. Cum with Daddy.”

And you did, your body exploded in fireworks when you felt his release planted inside of you. He kept moving, rocking back and forth. He leaned back, leaving your neck to rub your clit once again. He was a moaning mess, the overstimulation made it almost painful to keep going but he did not want it to stop, not until...

“Fuck, Daddy!” And a second wave of pleasure hit you hard, it left you panting and shaking even more than before.

Zemo had to pull away quickly, and already missed the feeling of being inside of you.

Your fingers reached between your bodies, dipping into your folds and moving up to your lips as they were covered in his seed. You painted your lips with his white cum, before you licked them and your fingers clean as he watched, completely amazed and mesmerized. “Taste just as good as I remembered.”

He laughed, he was always one step ahead of everything and everyone, but you always managed to take him by surprise. You were just that great, that perfect. He rolled to the side and fell heavily on the bed. His skin was glistening under the light of the chandeliers from the thin layer of sweat.

You pressed your legs together, clenching around nothing. You hoped you could keep his load inside of you, as a proof this had really happened and it was not just one of your daydreams where you two would be reunited.

“I missed this.” You boke the silence with a small voice. Your fingers brushed over the bruises on your neck, and you hissed at the sensitive skin.

He turned on his side, worried for a second that he went too hard on you. The smile and joy on your face proved him otherwise. “I missed you, Princess.”

“I missed you so much, Daddy.”

*~*~*

The sun hurt your eyes, he noticed. He slipped out of the bed to pull on the curtains only to hurry back to you so you could lay your head on his chest. You were still wearing your bracelet, he started playing with it.

His mind was racing, just like his heart. You could feel it rumble in his chest like a loud engine. Something was bothering him.

“Oh, Zemo...” You caressed his cheek, looking up to study his features. “You can fool the smartest people in the world, but you’ll never be able to lie to me.”

“I’m coming home, Baby. I’m coming home now.”

You looked down again, taking a moment to answer. “Let me guess, you’ll take me to a fancy house like Rebecca’s Manderley and Jane Eyre’s manor at the Rochester’s. You’ll show me around, make me feel like I belong. And you’ll leave, high and dry. Again. All the money and presents from your people won’t erase the pain I felt. Not this time, not ever.”

He pressed his thin lips together. Pain, suffering, he was used to it. He had his fair share of it, caused even more to other people. The thought of hurting you, however, was unbearable.

“Every kingdom needs its king...” He paused and moved you, so you were resting on your elbows and your face was closer to his. “And an even greater queen.”