#and a game in which they agreed to the murder stab death betrayal

[theminecraftbee]

you know okay so like. pathetic and lame of people to complain about martyn’s means of winning limited life, he deserved that win, narratively it was sick as hell, it was perfectly in-character, and like it’s the murder murder death game what rules.

on the other literally everyone I know or follow has just been going WOOO YEAH MARTYN GET THAT BREAD STAB THEM IN THE BACKS GET TO BE JUDAS ALL UP IN THIS PLACE BETRAYAL FOR THE WIN YEAH LET’S GO so hearing people are mad about it is frankly baffling to me,

[thedinanshiral]

Patterns

Today i'd like to make a quick mention of patterns. Repeated elements and narratives that insist on sticking around for unknown reasons.

In the history of Thedas that repeated element or theme is betrayal.

Starting from ancient Elvhenan, when the rest of the Evanuris betrayed Mythal and literally took her out of the picture. Then we have Fen'Harel avenging her by "betraying" both Evanuris and Forgotten Ones, condemning them to a near eternity of confinement away from the rest of the world. Next and following Mythal's death by murder we have the betrayal of Flemeth; sure, she cheated first, but while one could say love is capricious and acts without warning her husband did tricked her, intentionally betrayed her, killing her lover and imprisoning her and it's due to her desire for vengeance for that betrayal that Mythal's whisp finds her. Then a long time later Andraste is betrayed by her own husband out of jelaousy for her success and fame, only for the Maker himself to take her to his side enshrining her as the head of the new religious authority..see, there's the pattern. A female character stabbed in the back by their partner, one way or another, revindicated or avenged by something or someone from the beyond.

Then we have our protagonists. The Warden who more or less depending on the origin is betrayed, by people or fate, and must then rely on otherwordly powers to succeed in restoring some kind of order. Hawke, also betrayed by fate, by some he called a friend or even a lover, aided by Flemeth herself. The Inquisitor, once again, betrayed by a companion, friend or possibly even a lover but also saved by them. Who and under what circumstances will our new protagonist Rook be betrayed by this time?

But that's not the only pattern, there's two more i'd like to touch on.

First one involves the Inquisitor. While the only canon is that there is no canon and i do agree with that to some extent as BW have said once or twice that the canon story is the one the player chooses -even if that's not entirely honest of them as they do follow a default canon around which they continue to build the story- i must say if we are to follow patterns then the unofficial canon would be a female elven mage Inquisitor. In Jaws of Hakkon DLC we learn that the first Inquisitor, Ameridan, was an elven mage and throught the DLC story we learn he had a lover, an elven mage woman who happened to have some Rift magical habilities. Theirs was an unfortunate love that couldn't survive that final mission in the Frostback Basin; Ameridan sacrificed himself to seal Hakkon while his lover, injured, died alone in a nearby island waiting. Leaving their tragic end aside, is that not awfully similar to Solavellan? Elven mage inquisitor in a relationship with elven Rift mage companion, unable to remain together due to their duties. Not to mention Solavellan is the romance that fleshes out most of the lore regarding the Evanuris and Fen'Harel himself, exposing him, rendering him vulnerable. The events of Trespasser further solidify this. It is a female Lavellan, and specifically a mage one he can relate to, who cracks his walls that he's spent millenia building around him so tightly. It may not be the canon choice, but it certainly is the one that has the most to offer to the lore of Thedas and Solas' character.

Lastly, the other pattern i noticed is one of the games themselves. DAO is about the Fifth Blight, it resolves the Blight -more or less- and ends with the general idea of rebuilding. DA2 doesn't follow on that directly, it begins during the Blight and makes a timeskip to show the protagonist making a living in the Free Marches. As the events unfold, the game ends with the explosive beginning of the Mage-Templar war. DAI begins with peace talks to put an end to the Mage-Templar war only for it to blow up in the air again and be replaced by more pressing matters like a hole in the sky spitting out demons. By the end of this story -Trespasser- the next challenge is layed out: Finding Solas and stopping him from taking down the Veil. Now in DAV we start the game by...already having found Solas and interrupting his ritual, releasing a couple of monstrosities in the process, and the rest of the game we'll spend it trying to deal with that mess. So the pattern here is the previous game's cliffhanger and/or it's most central theme ends up becoming the opening context for the next game that will in turn revolve around something else as if the big disaster from the previous game wasn't that big of a deal after all. This is more evident between DA2 and DAI, and between DAI/Trespasser and DAV.

I imagine many thought they'd resolve the Mage-Templar war in Inquisition only to find the agenda changed. And after Trespasser we all thought we'd have to spend the next game chasing Solas all over Thedas to stop him but in the end all that happens quickly whithin the first hour of the game!

In a silly tiny way is like BW is betraying us too, our expectations from game to game. It's like.. We'll deal with the Mage-Templar war! BW: Lol think again. We'll have to chase Solas all over the map, a cat and mouse race, we'll spy and gather intel and try to outsmart the guy who's always five steps ahead and we'll stop him from taking down the veil! BW: Ha! Someone didn't read the comics lol try again

I think it's funny. Bit misleading, specially in this last case, because they set the stage and then basically tell you the play follows a different script and is to be performed at a different theater. So now i'm already preparing myself, if they make another game after this one, whatever is hinted at by the end will not be what we'll deal with then.

[flameandindifference]

How trash we talking?

Hoo boy, uh... yeah, Lucifer in the Lucius games is a terrible father. Intentionally and uncaringly terrible. Let's bullet point this:

Comes to Lucius when the boy is 6 years old and tells him what he really is while also basically instructing him to murder the entire household over the course of a year. Lucius does this. Lucius does EVERYTHING he was told to do.

Leaves Lucius to waste away in a mental hospital in the second game after the manor from the first game burns down. Lucius' powers even go away for a while, which indicates he lost his father's favor. Why? Because his older half-brother (surprise!) has 'fulfilled more of his purpose' than Lucius has and has gained Lucifer's favor.

Results in the brothers literally fighting to the death by the end of the game, bear in mind that Lucius is like... 7 and his half-brother is 16 or a little older.

Lucifer makes an appearance at the end of game 2, monologuing, mentioning how he has 'had many sons' and he will 'have many more' and how 'all of them have betrayed him'.

Lucius spends the entirety of game 3 still doing everything his father instructs him to do. To the letter, including getting souls and unlocking a good number of The Seven Seals. Only for Lucifer to murder the human follower that was taking care of Lucius near the end of the game, because Jack (the follower) suggested overthrowing Lucifer instead of following him. Bear in mind: Lucius never had time to agree or disagree with this suggestion.

Doesn't matter, Lucifer sees this as a betrayal from Lucius and says he 'has to punish him' ... by leaving him for a week while the literal Rapture is going on, says he 'doesn't know what will happen' to Lucius during this and 'Frankly, I'm so hurt, I'm not sure I even care.'

Attempts to murder Lucius more directly a second time at the very end of the game with a trident and is only stopped because Gabriel stabs him in the back.

So... Yeah, no, Lucifer in the Lucius games is a TRASHFIRE of a father.

[ever-is-typing]

Since I saw you do skins hdc can I request own for Desolate sand pleeeaaase 😗

note: yessssssss desolate sand :sobbing: legit so angry at myself for not being into the game when he was available he's so awesome >:(

🪙⏳ Desolate Sand!Andrew (Grave Keeper)⏳🪙 relationship headcanons

• the gold rush inspired many people to travel west-

• and you were certainly no exception.

• be it to chase a dream or to escape the dreariness of everyday life, you made the journey for the opportunity of a lifetime!

• though, your "opportunity" was cut rather short when Marshall- the wealthiest gold digger in the west- was murdered,,,

• and you were considered a suspect in aforementioned murder,,,

• then again, you weren't the only suspect in this ordeal.

• there were a variety of interesting characters involved- a bounty hunter, a western tycoon...

• and a mysterious masked stranger, just to name a few.

• like you, he wasn't from this small western town- no one knew where he was from, really

• either way, though, you were both outsiders. but that was about where the similarities ended

• this stranger was cloaked in secrecy. he covered his face with a dark bandana, but that didn't help to conceal the shocking red tint of his eyes or the stark whiteness of his hair.

• you were taken aback by his features at first, but you didn't find them as strange as the golden shovel he carried on his person at all times

• like what do you need a shovel for in the wild west bro that's kinda ಠ_ಠ ಠ_ಠ ಠ_ಠ

• he didn't have a name- or, rather, he never told it to anyone. so, when they're not calling him a "demon" because of his unusual appearance, the townsfolk took to calling him "Desolate Sand" for his solemn and enigmatic nature

• and, unlike everyone else involved in the crime, he didn't seem to care too much for money, which was practically unthinkable

• so yeah you were definitely intrigued by Desolate Sand from the start

• he, on the other hand, wasn't too keen on making friends. in his eyes, the westerners were all corrupt... putting their faith in gold coins instead of God, so they weren't worth his time

• but, when he sees you from the other side of the bar one day, fiddling with your empty glass, something about you stands out as different

• maybe it's the worry in your expression? the unspoken plea of innocence in your wide eyes? something about it just seemed so human...

• and, being a suspect of murder, he saw it as a breath of fresh air and rationale. you weren't like these other suspects, with their petty obsession for wealth and status.

• you were a person of reason, like him. a humble survivor of life, just trying to deliver God's justice in your own way...

• or, at least, he hoped so when he slid down into the seat next to you.

• "You look like you could use another drink, dollface."

• as he gestures for the bartender to fill your glass with the alcohol of your choice, you couldn't help but feel the corner of your thoughtful frown tug up into a smile

• "Dollface? That's awfully flattering for someone you don't even know." you would snort cheekily, looking him up and down. "Anything complimentary I should be calling you, stranger?"

• "The folks in these parts have taken to calling me Desolate Sand," he would respond, tipping his hat respectfully. "But something tells me you already knew that."

• you would nod, sipping on your drink in silence. at this point in the investigation, there wasn't anyone who didn't know about this mysterious man.

• "Well then, Mr. Desolate Sand, you can call me Y/N. Y/N L/N."

• "Charmed, Y/N L/N."

• "Likewise."

• from then on, you two would keep meeting at that spot in the bar- you spent most of your time together talking about your dreams for the future and your goals by travelling west

• or, at least, you did. Desolate Sand was rather reserved about his past, but he was more than happy to listen to you talk about yours. what a gentleman (¬‿¬)

• and, with every meeting you had, the both of you began to fall in love without even really noticing at first...

• ...which caused more worry to Desolate Sand than it did to you. you were a kind soul, a good person. you didn't deserve to be with a filthy sinner like him.

• besides, he's done some pretty horrible things in his life...

•...like killing Marshall-

• omg plot twist!! (o‿o)

• so, when you finally admitted your feelings to him and he hit you with that information, it was like a punch to the gut.

• up until this point, you had really grown to trust him- but this confession just felt like the grossest betrayal possible. what other horrible secrets was he keeping from you?

• so, not wanting to find out, you ran away.

• of course, Desolate Sand had his reasons for bringing that sickening man Marshall to his end. reasons he would never want to get you involved in.

• his deliverance of justice shouldn't come at the cost of a good heart like yours- so, even if it hurt, scaring you away from him was the safest option

• though, of course, that backfired on him once the infamous bounty hunter Black Rose got her hands on you.

• she was rather livid when she heard that someone else had gotten to Marshall before her-

• he was always at the top of her hit list, and she was expecting to draw a pretty penny out of his death before someone else had stolen the kill.

• turns out pretending to be a bartender is a great way to eavesdrop for information- and, seeing two of her fellow murder suspects chatting so pleasantly at the bar was quite intriguing to her.

• and how convenient that the mysterious stranger confessed to murder within earshot (even though she was already spying on you guys)!!

• "So, tell me, L/N," she cooed, pressing her cold black pistol to the side of your head. "Do you think that killing Mr. Desolate Sand will be enough for me to collect my bounty, or no? Perhaps I should take you out, too, just to compensate for all of the trouble your little lover has caused me-"

• "You get your filthy fuckin' hands off of them right now."

• even though he was far enough away from you that you could only see his silhouette, the rage in his eyes burned brightly enough that he was practically a beacon of raw emotion

• despite his obvious anger, though, Desolate Sand still leveled his revolver at her head with the confidence of someone who's shot it before

• and, though you were relieved to see him come to your aid, that remaining fact still scared you. the man you had grown to love had still killed a man.

• "So, what's it going to be, Desolate Sand?" Black Rose hollered. "You gonna turn yourself over to me so that I can collect my coin, or is pretty little Y/N here gonna have to die first?"

• Desolate Sand inwardly scoffed. it was always about coin in the west...

• the two stood in a silent stalemate for a while. neither moved a single inch out of place...

•...and that was starting to get on your nerves.

• so, you directed all of that pent up frustration into stabbing Black Rose in the gut with your elbow!

• she was actually caught quite off guard, so much so that she stumbled backwards and fumbled with the trigger of her gun-

• and suddenly, BANG.

•...though Desolate Sand's gun was the only one with one less bullet.

• Black Rose howled in pain and clutched her leg, red pooling around the flesh the bullet tore through

• you stumbled back, dazed by the sight, right into Desolate Sand's arms.

• you were at a loss for words- you didn't even know whether to thank him or apologize.

• though the urgency in his eyes told you right away that you had time for neither

• "Y/N, we don't have a lot of time here. The townsfolk will be out here any minute once they hear this broad screaming. She'll say we tried to kill her, so I'm going to get you onto a horse and send you away while I take care of all this-"

• you were very quick to shut him up with a kiss

• he was shocked for a moment, but he found himself slowly melting into it- you tasted absolutely heavenly.

• when you two regretfully pulled away for air, you told him very passionately that you weren't just going to leave him all alone.

• you'd take your hands in his, rubbing your thumbs over his hard leather gloves...

• "Desolate Sand, I... I know you lead a pretty intense life, but... that doesn't mean you have to live it alone. Neither of us do. I love you, and I'm not ready to leave you behind yet."

• he chuckled down at you. "Funny. I was about to say the exact same thing, doll."

• and so, you both made your escape, travelling from town to town in search of a quiet place to settle down

•...though that was quite hard with all of the wanted posters with your faces on them

• yeahhhhhh you're both kind of wanted criminals now I forgot to mention that sorry

• (Well, Desolate Sand more so than you. You're labelled as an "accomplice," and they just never seem to get your nose right on the posters. ;0)

• after everything, Desolate Sand agreed to deliver his justice in a less morbid fashion. despite everything you've faced in the past/will face in the future, you're both just happy to be at each others sides- and no amount of gold could ever compare to the love that you two share. ♡

"Y/N, you've got something these westerners and I lack- a good heart. You constantly prove to be a breath of fresh air in these lawless lands... don't ever change, darling. I'll protect you with my life."

-Desolate Sand!Andrew Kreiss 🕳🕳

[papa-rhys]

Thoughts on Jack and His Borderline Personality Disorder and How It Shows Through His Behaviour - Because I Cannot Stop Analysing Things That Ultimately Aren’t Important

Symptoms/behaviours under the cut because holy hell this guy has a lot of them. Like, honey, are you okay?

Okay, so I’m pretty sure I can trace Jack’s BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) back to his grandmother. His mum abandoned him, which shows a reckless/irresponsible behaviour and her mum had fits of rage that didn’t correlate at all with the trigger (ie; drowning Jack’s cat because he didn’t make his bed). So I think he has a family history of it, with both his mother and grandmother having BPD and passing it down to him.

Either way, Jack definitely has it. In fact, he’s a textbook case of it.

Impulsivity

Spending sprees: he bought a pony made of diamonds because he was bored and throws money at all kinds of ventures to keep him occupied and because he wants to. I really don’t know how else to describe this one lol. He bought a pony. Made of diamonds. Because he could.

Gambling: won some of the things on his trophy shelf through poker and owns an entire casino. Hunting the Vaults themselves were a huge gamble too, especially the first two, since he wasn’t truly sure that they existed. He was prepared to sacrifice a lot in order to come out on top in both his career and his social standing. All in all, he’s reckless.

Binge eating: he doesn’t even like pretzels, but still eats them because he’s either bored or stressed. Talks about food quite a bit in conversation, too, especially his cravings.

Substance abuse: admits to being high on uppers for the duration of the pre sequel (and his time on Elpis as a whole) and tells further anecdotes about drugs and getting high in tftbl.

Promiscuity/unsafe sex: nothing about having sex with Nisha is safe lol. But in all seriousness, there’s no way to prove this one. He does strike me as the reckless sex sort though. No proof, just 7 years of knowing him as a character.

Emotional instability

Inappropriate trigger response: he strangles a man to death for simply mentioning his wife, stabs Lilith for talking about Angel, and tries to kill Rhys for not being sure about his grand plan (more on this later). His response to triggers is disproportionate, often resulting in extreme anger over small things that don’t warrant that intense of a reaction. He gets big angry about almost everything; there’s no middle ground. His reaction is never really “you’re annoying me a lot” or “don’t talk about that, I don’t like it.” His reaction to almost everything is “oh my god I will murder your first born child how dare you-”

Quickly changing mood: aside from being prone to fits of rage at the flick of a switch, Jack also flicks back to “normal” pretty quickly, too. He flips between telling you to kill yourself after surviving the train and then talks casually about his day. He’ll be filled with rage after Angel’s death and then suddenly he’s laughing about you jumping into lava and having fun tricking you into visiting his grandmother. He can be intensely angry or sorrowful one moment and then nonchalant and sociable the next. His moods don’t last very long.

Idolisation/devaluation

Jack does this with numerous people across the games, but the two shining examples are Moxxi and Rhys; Rhys being the most notable. He idolises Moxxi, complimenting her on how attractive she is and how smart she is and including her in his circle of close friends/teammates. Then the inevitable happens and she lets him down and he instantly changes his opinion on her as if he’d never thought she was good to begin with. The same happens with Rhys. Throughout tftbl, Jack is best friends with Rhys and seems to form a one-sided connection with him where he idolises him and thinks they’re going to be best friends for ever and that they’re the perfect team. You cannot make him mad at you in tftbl (trust me, I’ve tried). He’s encouraging to Rhys the whole way through, like they’re brothers. Then the second Rhys displays doubts about something Jack is passionate about, Jack reacts violently and completely devalues Rhys, claiming him to be his mortal enemy and trying to kill him. People with BPD do this often. They have strong convictions and have a tendency to feel betrayed by people who go against those convictions. Jack does this regularly and it leads to the breakup of a lot of his relationships.

Paranoia

He vented a room full of scientists into space, just in case. I mean, that pretty much sums it up, really. Jack is under a lot of stress at this point in the game and stress-induced paranoia is a particularly difficult symptom of BPD. With him already feeling the pressure, the mention of a possible mole is a huge trigger for Jack. Especially since he’s reeling from the recent betrayal from a friend. His brain is already working over time, planting uneasy feelings of distrust and being unsafe. So when he’s presented with the idea from an outside source, he runs with it. Betrayal goes on to become a big button to push in Jack’s life to the extent that he actively betrays people before they get a chance to betray him (ie; killing Wilhelm). Paranoia feeds into a lot of Jack’s bad decisions, particularly in the pre sequel era.

Delusion

Jack wasn’t lying when he told us that he’s the hero. He absolutely was not the hero at all, but he wasn’t lying about it. Because lying about something implies that you know it’s not true, and Jack genuinely believes he’s a good person. The best person, in fact. It’s not a lie because in his mind, it’s the god given truth. He’s massively delusional, even before the events of the pre sequel. He’ll spout all the cheesy 80s movie lines about saving the moon and being the hero and he thinks he’s the protagonist of his own big adventure. We know that’s not what’s happening, but Jack doesn’t see it that way. Another delusion is the idea he has about how much everyone loves him. He thinks Moxxi is obsessed with him and he thinks Angel is being forced to work against him. He cannot conceive of a world in which people don’t like him or agree with him. Because why wouldn’t they agree with him? He’s the hero. Everybody loves the hero...

Intense but unstable relationships

Moxxi, Angel, Lilith, the Vault Hunter; I could go on. Jack’s relationships with people are volatile and rocky, even when they’re seemingly on the same side like with Moxxi or even Nisha (who he forms a tight bond with very quickly). People with BPD feel all emotions intensely, which causes a roller coaster. Jack really likes Moxxi, but then he doesn’t want to talk to her, but then he wants her on the team, but then he gets mad at her for calling him a pet name and beign friendly, and then he’s telling her she’s sexy, and then he’s cursing her, and then he’s hanging pictures of her in his casino. It’s the same with Angel - he subjects her to physical torture, then he loves her, then he’s mad at her for helping the Vault Hunter, then he’s doting on her, then he’s manipulating her, then he’s grieving for her. Everything is a whirlwind.

Distorted self-image

Oh boy. Jack has this physically and mentally. Mentally in the sense that he thinks he’s a good person when he actions are abhorrent and also because he’s massively insecure. BPD often comes with a lack of identity, which causes insecurity to begin with. Throw that in a pot alongside some childhood abuse, betrayal, work place bullying, and grief, and you got yourself a big pot of insecurity soup. Put plainly, Jack doesn’t really know who he is at his baseline. His personality and interests and ideas and needs all change on an hourly basis. He morphs to suit his circumstances. He can be open, honest and down to earth when he’s trying to trick Rhys. He can be full of worry and desperation when he needs you to head to grandma’s house. He can be cunning and clever when he’s tricking you into killing Wilhelm. He can be fatherly, he can be nasty, he can be torturous, he can be laid back, he can be clever, he can be ignorant, he can be sheepish, he can be cocky. He’s everyone and no one all at once and this probably leaves him feeling very hollow and empty; which is another symptom of BPD. In the physical sense, Jack issues with self image are pretty clear. He wears a face over his face to hide his face. Yup. And he does this because he thinks he’s disgracefully ugly. This scar he’s so vehemently protective of is something that defines his whole persona going forward. He literally claims himself as Handsome Jack, forcing people to adhere to the idea that he’s so attractive that it should be his title. Even though he doesn’t feel that way and does everything he can to hide the real him. He thinks he’s hideous and he struggles between loving himself and hating himself because of it.

Fear of abandonment

Aaaand here we are at the crux of the problem. BPD boils down to the intense fear of abandonment and this is probably what guides Jack for most of his life. His father died, his mother literally abandoned him, his grandmother neglected him, his first wife died, second wife left, girlfriend and friends betrayed him, and daughter killed herself to get away from him. Abandonment is practically coded into Jack’s DNA at this point and every time it happens, it confirms his fears more. He clings to Moxxi after she betrays him - taking her ideas to try and rile her up and even going as far as to recreate her entire bar in his casino because he wants to keep her presence around. He fights tooth and claw against Angel’s rebellion, begging both her and you to stop what you’re doing and leave. The only time he begs you is when he’s facing perceived abandonment, that’s how strong the fear is. His final words to Angel are “I’ll still forgive you.” Jack isn’t a forgiving man by any stretch, but he’ll say anything he has to in order to prevent her from leaving him. He’ll stalk people, he’ll manipulate them, he’ll lie to them or keep them physically locked up - all to prevent them from abandoning him. The worst possible thing that could happen to Jack is that, and we see the spiral he slips into after Angel. After Moxxi. After the Meriff. After his wife. He can’t bare the thought of someone leaving him and he’ll do anything and everything to prevent his fears becoming a reality.

So yeah! There it is, I finally got around to posting it lol. There’s probably a lot more little details that I’ve forgotten, but I cannot think of them right now. I’ll probably update if I think of any more! The tl;dr is that almost all of Jack’s behaviour can be linked to massively untreated BPD. He needed meds and therapy, but he didn’t get them and he spiralled as a result.

[speechlessxx]

Bring Him Light - x (King!Steve Rogers x Reader)

Chapter Summary: The truth finally comes out.

Warnings: brief mention of sex, mentions of death, really shitty writing tbh, dialogue driven. (NOTE: when concerning the flashbacks, he’s actually explaining to the reader what happened)

Word Count: 2.5k

Note: Feel free to send me any questions because I know this is a really crappy chapter. (of course, I’m not going to reveal the rest of the plot)

<- Last Part -=+=- Next Part ->

You could still taste the salt from the sea on your lips. The memories of what happened aboard that ship still fresh like a wound that you’d carry forever. You stared at your hands that were conjoined with your husband’s. The wedding bands glistened in the dimmed room.

“Will you believe me if I told you everything?” Steven asked. His thumb drew soothing circles on the back of your hand. His grip tight as if he were afraid you’d disappear again.

“Everyone’s lied to me.” You whispered. You looked towards Wanda’s body, still covered with the bloodstained tarp. “What would make you any different?”

“This is the truth,” he promised. “The complete truth.”

When Steven was young, his mother doted on him because he was a sickly child. He grew up to have her compassion, optimism, and idealism. He was sixteen when his father unexpectedly died, and he was hailed King of Brooken. He wanted to carry his mother’s ideals into a new age for Brooken, but he underestimated what it meant to have a crown on his head.

The sacrifices he’d have to make, the betrayals he’d have to face, the blood he’d have to spill. He’s told more lies that he could count – all in the name of protecting his reputation and his power. A cruel king is respected after all. The lies were like storm clouds that poured hard. He drowned in them and got lost in the darkness those clouds brought. The lies burdened him more than anyone would ever know.

You squeezed hand, breaking him away from his thoughts. “Steve?” Your tone was soft, coaxing him back into reality. He welcomed the calm you brought. It eased the storm inside of him. You were ready for the truth – perhaps, you’ve always been ready. “Unburden yourself, my love.”

“I don’t know where to start.” He said, honestly. It was true. There was so much to the story. He wasn’t quite sure where it began.

“Start with Margaret, perhaps?” You suggested.

“I was young,” he began. “Twenty-one years old. Five years on the throne. They told me I needed a wife.”

“They?”

“Pierce and the old council.” He answered. “Brock’s father had just died, so he took the vacant seat. At first, I thought having my cousin on the council would alleviate the tension. The lords on the council were nearly twice my age, if not more. They saw things differently than I did. They wanted different things. Sometimes I felt as if I were their puppet. I was young when I took the throne. Sixteen. I didn’t know what to expect, so I leaned on their counsel. I depended on them,” he scoffed, remembering his earlier years on the throne. “They told me I needed to continue the line succession. Thanos was beginning to make a name for himself by this time. He had lovers and spawned two daughters. His line was growing, and the Rogers’s wasn’t. So, I asked them to find me a match. Pierce brought in Lady Margaret of House Carter. I was smitten when I first laid eyes on her.”

Steven sat tall upon his throne. The room was empty. Brooken had a tradition that detailed that those in royal betrothals must meet for the first time in private. He was giddy with excitement. Lady Margaret’s portraits were presented to him a month ago. She was easily one of the most beautiful creatures he’d ever seen. Lord Pierce made the arrangements and they were to marry within a week. “House Carter is a respected house in the Old World,” Pierce advertised.

The doors opened wide and a young woman walked through. Her hair was dark as night. Her lips painted a bright red. She smiled at him and bowed. “Your grace,” she greeted. “I am humbled to make your acquaintance and, of course, honored to be your betrothed.”

“I didn’t know her, truly. I didn’t realize how manipulative she was from the beginning. She charmed and enchanted me to do her bidding. We were married for nearly a decade. No children. She didn’t want children. I didn’t want to lose her, so I agreed.

“She had many faces. A face she’d show the people that made them love her. A face she showed me that hypnotized me. And the face she’d show my allies, which were her foes. She fought with James incessantly – even tried to make me banish him. I refused. He was my oldest friend. I promised the moment I took the throne, my riches, my blessings were his to share. She was trying to isolate me. She banished my allies from court. James warned me she was a devil. I refused to listen. I thought her a gift from the gods themselves. Until I caught her poisoning my mother.”

“What?” You gasped.

Steven nodded. The haunting memory pained him still.

He woke up alone after a long night of making love to his queen. It was early in the morning; the sun had barely risen. Orange streaks painted the sky. He searched for Margaret, wanting to jest her for allowing him to wake up alone. He found her whispering to his sick, elderly mother who was bedridden due to a broke hip.

“You won’t get away with it. My son will find out,” his mother croaked.

“Not from you,” Margaret gave her a wicked smile as she slathered arsenic-riddled paint on his mother’s toast. The thick substance looked like jam, but Steve knew better. She force-fed the queen mother the poisoned bread.

“What are you doing!” Steve boomed into the room, pushing his wife aside as his mother choked. “Guards! Get a physician!”

“She died later that evening.” Steven shook his head. It was your turn to console him. You released one of your hands from his grip and rubbed his arm. He took a shaky breath. “I stabbed Margaret in the heart in front of Rumlow, Pierce, James, and Sam’s father. I didn’t know, yet, that her betrayals were much deeper than the murdering my mother.”

“Enter Sharon?” You asked.

“I was widowed for a year. Pierce brought her in. The younger cousin of Margaret.” He continued. “Married two days after her arrival in Brooken.” He chuckled humorlessly at his naivete. “I should’ve never marry a stranger.”

“We married in two weeks.” You noted. “We were practically strangers, too.”

Steven shook his head in disagreement. He didn’t feel that way. In the two weeks he grew to know you, he learned the innerworkings of your mind, your soul. He knew he was in love with you, truly, even before he wrapped the cloak around your shoulders during the wedding ceremony.

“We weren’t strangers.” He said. “Far from it. Sharon was distant. Defiant. We never consummated our marriage, not that anyone would know. She refused to sleep in my chambers, refused to be held, or anything, really. It felt as if I had married a ghost that everyone could see. I couldn’t touch her, but she still haunted these halls.”

“You beheaded her.” You said. Steven bit his lip as he nodded. “Pierce said you beheaded her out of spite.”

Steven cocked his head to the side, brows raising, as if he entertained the idea. “Well, she was spiteful.”

“The men in the prisons… They preferred her over you and you imprisoned them, correct?”

Steven sighed. He was disappointed that you were so quick to believe rumors and lies about him, but he blamed himself for not being completely honest from the start. “Sharon plotted a coup on behalf of the Mad King.”

“How can you be certain?” You asked.

“She admitted it when she was caught.”

Steven stared down at the blonde. Her eyes wide as he finished reading her encrypted letter. “You’re not subtle. You’re not discreet.” He spat at her, crumpling the paper and throwing it at her feet. “You work for the Mad King. You’re here to topple me. Rip the crown from my head and give it to him. The game’s over, Sharon. You’ve lost. Your followers all caught and imprisoned. I will get a confession and you will die for treason.”

She recomposed herself, rolling back her shoulders with confidence. “You think you can just kill off another queen? What will people think of you, Steven.”

“I am pulling the weeds from my kingdom.” He snapped. “You Carters are all the same. Traitors. Liars.”

“Margaret was good.” Sharon complimented. “She had you wrapped around her finger for a decade. If she hadn’t been caught killing your mother, then she would’ve convinced you to ally yourself with Thanos.” She turned her head to the side and gave him a smirk. “Then, she would’ve killed you along with your mother. Such a shame, she was caught.”

“You admit. You’re a traitor.”

“Of course, I admit it. But mind you, your grace, your enemies are all over Brooken. You cut me down today, someone else will cut you down tomorrow.”

“I beheaded her for treason.”

“You didn’t tell people that your queens were committed treason. You allowed rumors to spread about your cruelty to your wives.” You frowned.

“As I told you before, a cruel king is respected.” Steven muttered. “But I never wanted you to be afraid of me.”

“Isn’t it odd?” You asked. “Both queens chosen by Pierce were traitors.”

Steven nodded. “They pushed me to get married once more, but I told them, this time I’ll choose my bride.”

“Me.”

“It’s three years after the War between the North. Tony and I were close before. I fought alongside your father when York was invaded ages ago.”

“You fought over a disagreement over land.”

“More than land. He wanted James dead. James’s father killed your grandfather. Since James’s father had died long before, your father asked for my friend’s head. I refused. So, a war erupted.”

“You traded blows with my father on the battlefield.” You recalled. You remembered your mother’s cries and pleads with the gods, asking for them to protect your father’s life. “He returned to my mother bloodied. You cut through his armor. But you looked him in the eyes and called the war off.”

“No one won.”

“No one.” You agreed. “Three years later, you ask my father for a wife.”

“I needed a wife I could trust. Although we had our differences, I trust your father with my life. I know Tony’s blood. I know how you would’ve been raised to be loyal. You took after your father and your mother.” Steven explained. “I didn’t trust Pierce to find me a wife that could slit my throat in the night.”

“You trust me?” You asked.

“The moment I stared into your eyes and saw fear… I knew you knew the rumors. I knew you thought of me as cruel – our first encounter made that clear.” He smiled at you softly. His fingers lightly traced the scars of your wrist. He brought your wrist to his lips and pressed a light kiss onto the skin. “But, truthfully, my trust in you waned when I saw you with Brock and Pierce leaving the dungeon. I began to think you were conspiring with them.”

“I – I – I wasn’t.”

“I know that now.” He said. “I realized you were afraid of disappointing me because you didn’t … you weren’t –“

“Pregnant.” Your voice wavered, immediately brought back to the painful memory of losing your baby alone on the boat. “I should’ve told you I was, though. But I was afraid. I thought you were going to kill me. You struck me.”

“I’m terribly sorry.” Steven shook his head. No amount of apologizes could ever make up to the faded scar on your cheek.

“I was afraid for my life and the child’s. They manipulated me because of my fears. They prayed upon it and convinced me to trust them. And I did. In turn, I – I lost my best friend and my baby.”

Steve pulled you to him. Your head rested in the junction between his neck and shoulder as you cried softly into him. He rubbed your arm, comfortingly.

“They tried to turn you against me.” Steven whispered. “They tried to weaken me by trying to kill you on that boat. I thank the gods that you’re safe now.”

“Thank you for telling me the truth.” You muttered.

Steven nodded and kissed the top of your head. His arm around you tightened a bit. “You should sleep. Get some rest. You need it after what you’ve endured.”

You agreed. Steven untangled himself from you before he leaned down to press a kiss to the scar on your cheek and a kiss on your lips. He began to walk away when you felt panic begin to settle. Your hand shot out and grabbed onto his arm, preventing him from taking another step.

“Please stay.” You begged. “I… I don’t want to be alone.”

He gave you a soft smile and nodded. You scooted over the cot to make room for your husband. The positioning was a bit awkward considering his massive build, but you immediately felt safer once his arms wrapped around you once again.

»»————-　⚜　————-««

You woke up alone in Steven’s bedchamber. The sun had already set, the full moon up in the sky. The pain had subsided after nearly a day of rest. The truth settling in inside your mind.

At least now you knew everything.

The doors opened suddenly to reveal your husband. He smiled at you as you sat up on the bed. “You’re awake.”

“You left me alone.”

Steven’s smile faltered. He couldn’t register if there was sadness in your voice or not as he walked over. “I – I hadn’t meant to upset you.”

You shook your head. “I understand. You’re a king. Your duty is to the people, not to me.”

“I am your husband, first.” Steve argued. “My duty will always be to you, my love.” He took your hand in his and helped you off the bed. “Come. There’s something I must show you.”

He led you to the balcony doors, opening it and allowing the air rush into the room. You breathed it in. The mixed scents from the gardens below overtook your senses, washing out the pained sea salt smell that still haunted you.

Steven guided you out onto the terrace and wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you in front of him. You gasped as you looked up to the sky. Along with the bright moon and the stars were lanterns that floated into the air and painted the dark sky.

“For years, I stumbled alone in the darkness. Feigned love with false queens who sought to destroy me. And here you are. The true gift the gods bestowed upon me. I truly believe you were crafted to be my soulmate, (Y/N).” He murmured in your ear. “I wish I could take away the pain you’ve endured, but I cannot. I can only tell you whatever comes next, we will face it together as husband and wife.” Tears swelled in your eyes and cascaded down your cheeks as you stared up into the bright sky. “I love you, my light, my love.”

You smiled and turned to him, cupping his bearded cheeks in your hands. “I love you, Steve.”

[botanicallyinclinednerd]

The Game of Camelot (Sat Upon His Throne, All Alone)

Part one of A dark AU for The Coming of Arthur Part 2 where Leon's loyalty is to the people of Camelot alone and he is willing to do anything to save Camelot from being ruled by a tyrannical monster, even if he becomes a monster himself in the process. This is also posted on my AO3 here. 

Warnings for this fic include: Major character death, Murder, Dark Leon, poisoning, nightmares, and hurt no comfort. Please be safe.

~~~

Leon prided himself on his loyalty. He considered himself a loyal knight of Camelot and so did everyone else. It's why no one ever suspected him. Why no one ever stopped to question how he got to where he was today. Why no one stopped to ask why he was king.

~~~

"Sir Leon is a traitor," was a sentence that had never been said by anyone in Camelot. And if anyone had been foolish enough to voice such a thing, they would have, at best, been laughed out of Camelot, and at worst, never left Camelot ever again. Because everyone knew that Leon would die for Camelot. He was loyal to his kingdom to the end.

The misconception was that while Leon was indeed loyal to Camelot, he did not have the same undying loyalty for his king. Uther Pendragon was a tyrant king who ruled with fear and death. He was irrational when it came to magic and his penalty against it was overzealous and extreme. His citizens had suffered under his rule for too long. Someone needed to ensure it ended, one way or another. 

Leon grew up with Morgana, had been her friend since before she became Uther’s ward. When he learned she had magic, he promised to protect her. When he learned about her plans to kill Uther, he pretended to have no idea. When he learned of her parentage and her desire to claim the throne for herself, Leon was supportive but uneasy. When he met Morgause, he faltered. When he learned of the lengths she went to try to kill Arthur by using Gwen and Elyan as bait, Leon's support became an act. Uther was a bad king and he didn't know what kind of king Arthur would be but Leon knew that Morgana would just be another Uther. He couldn't let that happen.

As far as Morgana was concerned, Leon was loyal to her. He made sure this was never in doubt. It could never be in doubt.

~~~

When Morgana told him to kill Arthur, Leon felt uneasy. Arthur was his prince and while he was Uther’s son he was not a bad man. Leon had no ill will towards him and was sincere in his loyalty to him. He didn't want to kill him.

When Morgana suggested he act defiantly when he was brought before Morgana in order to lure Gwen out to make her betray her true loyalties and help Leon escape to find Arthur so Leon could kill both of them at the same time, Leon thought he was going to be sick. She wanted him to kill both the prince and Gwen? Gwen, his childhood friend, his oldest friend? The kindest, sweetest person he has ever known, who wouldn't even hurt a fly? 

Leon wasn't sure he could do that. And yet, somehow, for the good of Camelot, he must.

~~~

There were eight of them. Eight people. Eight witnesses. Eight liabilities. Leon didn't want to kill eight people. Hell, he didn't want to kill the two people he had to kill. But Leon was a strategist. He knew the best shot he had of accomplishing his goal of liberating Camelot from tyranny and fear was to leave no one behind to reveal the treachery he was willing to commit to do it. He didn't want to kill these eight people but he would if he had to.

~~~

"'There is no one else I'd rather die for,'" Leon pledged and maybe what he was about to do would be easier if he was lying. But he wasn't. 

~~~

Leon wasn't comfortable with this. He had killed people before, sure, but in battle as a knight, and those he killed were his enemies. Tonight he would not be acting as a noble knight but as a traitorous assassin, slaughtering people that trusted him. People he knew. Leon didn’t know Merlin well, but he did know that there was more to Merlin that met the eye. He had long suspected that the servant had played at least some part in foiling some of the attacks on Arthur and Camelot over the years. For that alone, he liked Merlin, even before taking into account the boy’s dry wit. Leon liked Gaius as well. And Gwen and Elyan? They had grown up together. He considered them his friends. Hell, he thought of Gwen as his best friend. The whole reason Morgana lost his loyalty in the first place was her willingness to put the two of them in danger. And Arthur…Arthur wasn't his father. He was a good man, and Leon believed he could be a good king, but he also knew that Arthur was like his father in the one way that mattered: he distrusted magic. Leon would even go as far to say he hated it. There was the chance that Arthur may one day change his mind but Leon could not take the risk. There was only one way he could ensure that peace and magic would return to Camelot. In that moment, Leon made a decision he knew he would regret for the rest of his life. He just hoped he would be able to live with it.

~~~

Leon wouldn't call himself a coward. This is not cowardice, he thought, as he laced his companions' food with hemlock. This is not cowardice, he thought as they all began to show symptoms of poisoning. This is not cowardice, he reminded himself as he too pretended to fall ill. It is not cowardice, Leon repeated to himself as he faked a coughing fit while he closed Gaius’s unseeing eyes. This is not cowardice, he thought as he allowed himself to hold Gwen as she wept. This is not cowardice, he reminded himself as he listened to the last of his companions take their final rattling breath. No, he told himself when he opened his eyes and got to his feet, his act of afflicted and dying friend no longer necessary with no one else left alive to witness his deception and betrayal, this was not cowardice. Leon took in the result of his handy work and made himself look at each of them, to look at what he had done. This was kindness.

~~~

Leon knew he couldn't leave the bodies as they were. Morgana expected him to slaughter them, not poison them. He couldn't risk going against her expectations now. If she suspected anything was off, all would be lost and Leon's actions here would have been for nothing. He couldn't let their deaths be in vain. 

So Leon picked up a discarded sword with gold engravings that was not his own and, with a whispered plea for forgiveness, he hacked and slashed the bodies in a manner that mimicked an ambush. He started with the three men he didn't know very well, the three knights he had murdered before they ever had a chance to live up to their new titles. Then he moved on to Arthur, trying desperately not to think of the young boy Leon had trained to use a sword so long ago now as he cut the young man he had become into ribbons. 

When Leon looked down on Merlin, he swallowed roughly. When they all began to fall ill, Merlin had acted as a physician alongside Gaius, but as soon as Arthur had lost consciousness, Merlin threw caution to the wind. He had tried to heal him. He tried several times before he sat back on his heels and let out a broken sob. There was nothing he could do. That didn’t stop him from trying to heal Gaius. Or Lancelot. Or Gwen. With each new failure to even alleviate the symptoms, Merlin’s face crumbled more and his health flagged further. When Merlin approached Leon, the knight had jerked away before he could touch him, afraid not of Merlin, but that he might discover that Leon wasn’t actually dying like the rest of them. But of course, Merlin didn’t know that. He was a freshly outed sorcerer approaching a knight of Camelot who backed away out of fear. There was only one conclusion Merlin could draw. Like many things about that accursed day, Merlin’s expression when Leon backed away would haunt him forever.

Leon moved on to Gaius, taking a deep breath and stabbing once before quickly moving away. Which left him with only two more choices. 

Leon shut his eyes tightly. It was too late for remorse and regret. They were gone, dead. They weren't coming back. He killed them, murdered them, and nothing he did now could hurt them anymore. Of course it could still hurt him but he should have thought about that before he killed his only friends in the world.

Leon whispered a choked apology and raised the sword above his head.

~~~

Leon picked up his own sword and taking a steadying breath, slashed himself in the arm. He clenched his eyes tight against the pain and breathed through it. It wasn’t ideal, but he couldn’t return to Camelot without a mark on him, not with the version of events he planned to tell Morgana. It would also look far more convincing and believable to the knights and people of Camelot the story he planned to tell them. He just needed Morgana to agree to it. 

As he stabbed himself shallowly in the thigh, Leon went over in his head what he would tell Morgana: First he killed Arthur then Gwen and he was about to kill Gaius when Merlin woke up and raised the alarm. He killed Gaius and Merlin swiftly and one of the wanna be knights before the other three all started fighting him at once. They got a couple of lucky shots in but they were nothing against him. Hopefully, it would be enough to pass not only Morgana’s scrutiny, but Morgause’s as well.

~~~

When Leon was "recaptured" by Morgana’s men, Leon told her "what happened." She was pleased. And luckily, when Leon proposed to tell the people of Camelot that it was the immortal men that killed Arthur and his companion and it was only barely that Leon survived, Morgana agreed. And he didn't even need to suggest that he continue to pretend to despise her because she suggested it first. After all, it would look awfully suspicious if Leon was suddenly supportive of Morgana. She could lose the support of the other knights if they believed Leon a traitor or enchanted. And that was something neither of them wanted. 

~~~

The execution of Uther Pendragon was quite the public spectacle. Citizens filled the square, crowded around the large pyre in the middle. To the side, the surviving knights of Camelot were made to watch, each restrained on either side by one of the immortal soldiers. 

When Uther was brought out to the square, the crowd went silent. How far the king had fallen. In the end, his hate was his undoing. It was fitting that it was magic that killed him. From her balcony, Morgana put an end to Uther Pendragon with a flash of gold and a blaze of fire.

Leon’s only regret that day was he could not let his satisfaction show when Uther began to scream as the flames consumed him. Could not scoff at the tyrant’s shouted pleas for mercy. Could not smirk when the screams stopped, knowing what that meant. Could not cheer with relief and joy when the flames died away to reveal a very charred and very dead Uther. No, Leon could not do any of these things because he still had a role to play. Instead of satisfaction, Leon struggled against the soldiers holding him back. Instead of scoffing, he grimaced. Instead of smirking, he stopped struggling and slumped his shoulders in defeat. Instead of cheering, his eyes were wide with horror. Leon played his role very well, just as he always did. 

The tyrant was dead, long live the queen.

Well. Not long. Not if Leon had anything to say about it. 

~~~

Leon was a patient man. He served for years under Uther, a few months under Morgana in order to find a way to take out her and Morgause was easy. All the while, he continued to play the loyal knight to Morgana behind closed doors while acting as the reluctant first knight to an usurper queen in front of his fellow remaining knights and the people of Camelot. It was a dangerous line Leon walked. One misstep and he was dead.

In the end, his patience paid off. Once he learned that those who gave blood to the cup in exchange for immortality were cursed with an existence neither truly alive nor dead and emptying the cup would end those lives, Leon came up with a plan. It was risky and tricky and definitely a bit crazy, but it was the best chance Leon had of killing the sisters without dying himself. 

Getting the blood without them noticing was far easier than he expected and he never wanted to think about how he managed it ever again. Getting the blood to the guarded cup without arousing suspicion or getting killed by a pissed off priestess or an immortal soldier? That was the difficult part. Somehow, he managed to get to the cup in one piece. And somehow, he got the blood into the cup. And somehow, he managed to knock the cup over right as Morgana and Morgause barged in, spilling all the blood onto the floor before they could stop him.

Unlike the last batch of deaths he facilitated, Leon could not bring himself to feel remorse as the immortal soldiers exploded into nothingness around him, and he felt no grief as Morgana and Morgause followed suit, not even when Morgana’s eyes, wide with hurt and betrayal, locked with his before she ceased to be.

~~~

Leon sat upon his throne, crown heavy on his head as he looked out over his people, now his subjects. With Morgana and Morgause dead and no surviving Pendragons to take the throne, the beloved first knight that rid Camelot of Morgana was the obvious choice. 

The witch was dead, long live the king.

~~~

There was a secluded clearing in the woods where eight grave markers sat in a row. Every year, on every birthday, every holiday, and on the anniversary of their deaths, Leon would visit the graves. Sometimes he would talk, sometimes he’d stay silent. Most times, he cried. Every time, he left flowers. It was such a beautiful place for a shrine to the dead.

For the three men he had barely known, Leon searched and tracked down their names until he knew them: Gwaine, Lancelot, and Percival. Their birthdays were far more elusive so Leon picked a day for each of them and returned on that day every year. For Merlin, whose birthday was also unknown, he returned to the graves on the day he first met him. 

Sometimes the visits would be brief and other times they would last for hours. No matter how long Leon stayed it was never enough. No amount of time would ever be enough to atone for what he did. No amount of time could ever undo the damage he’d cause because it was time they never got to have.

~~~

Leon was called a fair and just king. His people loved him, and he loved them. And more importantly, they loved his queen. It wasn't long after he was crowned king of Camelot that Leon opened negotiations with King Rodor of Nemeth. The lands of Gedref had been disputed for generations. Leon agreed to give a majority of them to Nemeth in exchange for Princess Mithian's hand in marriage. Leon knew it would give him a powerful ally and would give him legitimacy in the eyes of the other kings. Rodor agreed. After they were wed, Leon waited. He had already stopped enforcing the ban against magic and stopped arresting and executing sorcerers, and now he welcomed the druids back to Camelot. When enough time had passed to get the people of Camelot used to magic again without fearing it, he made public a fact that he had known since before he asked Rodor for Mithian’s hand in marriage, a fact that few outside of Nemeth knew: Queen Mithian had magic. 

"People of Camelot, for over two decades magic has been persecuted and outlawed from our kingdom. And for over two decades the citizens of this kingdom have lived in fear. That fear ends today. Magic is not evil, it does not corrupt. I know this because I have yet to meet a kinder soul than that of my wife's. Queen Mithian is the sweetest person I know and she loves this kingdom as I do," Leon announced from the balcony overlooking the square where the people of Camelot were looking up at him. Whispers broke out among the crowd as they caught his meaning. Leon reached out a hand to Mithian, who took it with a warm smile. She was nervous about the announcement but he promised her he would let no harm come to her and she trusted him. "Your queen has magic. She has magic and she has only ever used it for good, to help people. Magic is not evil, it is a tool. Just as a sword is a tool for justice and protection in the hands of a knight but a tool for menace and terror in the hands of a bandit, the nature of magic depends on how it is used. For too long all those who dared use magic as a tool for any reason were punished. No more. From now on, magic is free in Camelot. Having and using magic is no longer a crime. But just as bandits are not welcome in Camelot, neither are those that use magic for harm. Crimes committed with magic will be treated the same as every other crime of that nature, and dark magic with the intent to harm others may be punishable by death. But those who use magic peacefully have nothing to fear. I hereby repeal the ban against magic in Camelot." 

~~~

Leon sat upon his throne, his wife by his side. He had done it. He freed his people from the rule of tyranny and fear. Magic was free. Camelot was free.

But Leon was not free and he knew he never would be. There was innocent blood on his hands, blood of people who trusted him, people he called his friends. 

Leon may have Mithian but she didn't know the truth about his rise to power. If she did, she would rip herself away from him in disgust and horror and look at him as if he were a monster. Then he would be truly and utterly alone. 

Leon sat on his throne with his Queen at his side. He may be lonely but he was not alone, not as long as he had her. And as long as he had her beside him and he had the people of Camelot to take care of, Leon would not become the monster he saw in his reflection. As long as he had them and he held onto his reason for becoming king in the first place, he would not succumb to his guilt. 

Leon had blood on his hands that he could never wash clean, skeletons in his closet he could never get rid of or share with anyone, and a monster in his reflection.

~~~

Leon jolted awake with a gasp, his body drenched in cold sweat. He let out a long sigh as his surroundings filtered in and he recognized Mithian sound asleep beside him. Quietly, so to not wake her, Leon eased out of bed. He had gotten a lot of practice over the years of shaking off the nightmares without bothering her. He walked over to a basin of water and without looking, he cupped some in his palms and splashed it over his face. Leon didn't need to think very hard to remember what his dream was about. It was the same thing it was always about. Tonight it was Elyan and Gwen that had taken the central role in his nightmare. 

Gwen was struggling to breathe, her eyes wide and panicked as she held her baby brother in her arms, his head cradled in her lap with his eyes half closed and his breathing growing steadily weaker and weaker. Elyan was dying. They were both dying, but there was no question who would go first. A jolt of guilt ran through Leon and as he stood looking down at his childhood friends whom he had condemned to death, a tear rolled down his face. Gwen’s head snapped towards him, her eyes hardening with hatred and betrayal. "You. You did this. Why, Leon? Why did you do this? How could you do this?" 

Leon shook his head sadly, another tear sliding down his face. "I had to, Gwen. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. It's for Camelot, I had to for Camelot. I had no other choice."

Gwen scoffed and narrowly avoided a coughing fit as a result. "'In life, you always have a choice. Sometimes it's easier to think that you don't,'" Gwen rasped angrily. "You chose this, Leon. You didn't have to kill us, but you did anyway. You chose this." She looked away from Leon and instead turned her gaze on Elyan, who had gone still in her arms. "Elyan? Elyan!" She shouted, shaking him to wake him. He didn't wake up. He couldn't. "No!" Gwen screamed in pure anguish.

Leon let out a shudder and splashed more water over his face to banish the lingering tendrils of the nightmare. It was only temporary. It was always just temporary. Leon was haunted by his actions in the castle of the ancient kings and the things he did that day would haunt him til the day he died. He would never be free of his guilt and he didn't deserve to be free of it. Gwen never knew it was him. If she had, she would have pushed him away when he sat down next to her with tears streaming down his face and held her as she sobbed over Elyan while dying herself. She wouldn't have clung onto his arm as if it would protect her and keep her afloat. Just as Elyan had died in her arms, Gwen had died in Leon’s. With his oldest friend dead, Leon had let himself collapse onto the floor and close his eyes, feigning severe illness himself. He had laid there listening to his victims die knowing he was responsible as Gwen grew cold beside him. Leon shook his head sharply and took a breath to steady himself. He let it out slowly, opening his eyes as he did so. His eyes found his reflections' in the still water of the basin. For just a split second, his reflection changed and the person he was seeing was not himself, but Uther Pendragon. Leon blinked tiredly and when he looked again his reflection was his own again. Leon’s hands curled into fists as he looked at his reflection. Uther Pendragon was a monster and a tyrant king. He deserved to die. Leon still believed this and never once had his conviction wavered on this stance. Uther had so much innocent blood on his hands he was drenched in it. The world was a better place without that monster in it. It troubled Leon but didn't surprise him when he caught a glimpse of the long dead king in his own reflection. After all, Leon was a monster too, with hands crimson with innocent blood, blood belonging to his friends. In many ways, Leon considered himself more of a monster than Uther ever was. For Uther Pendragon was driven by hate and anger. The murders he committed came from hatred and self righteousness. He thought his actions were justified and right. Leon was driven by love and determination. Leon murdered eight people who never did him any harm, five of whom he considered friends, when he knew doing so was wrong. They did not deserve to die, there was nothing just or right about it and Leon regretted his actions every day of his life. He hated himself for it because he knew he would do it again. He knew what he did was wrong but it was necessary to save Camelot and it's people and he would do it again if he had to. That's what made him the bigger monster.

~~~

King Leon sat on his throne, lonely, but not alone. He was a monster and that fact was unknown.

King Leon sat on his throne, lonely, but not alone. He now had children and was slowly growing old.

King Leon lay in bed, dying, frail, and old, but never alone. Leon’s eyes drifted closed and all his sins remained unknown.

[selkiewife]

I know i’m late on this but I wanted to talk about The Dragon Demands videos based on the Game of Thrones Season 8 blue ray commentary and the original archived scripts for Game of Thrones, Season 8.

Basically, YouTuber, The Dragon Demands went to the Writer’s Guild Library where he was able to see the archived scripts of Season 8 of Game of Thrones. Both the archive scripts and commentary on the blue ray confirms that most of the destruction in King’s Landing was originally supposed to be caused by the caches of wild fire left by Aerys being accidentally set off by Drogon and not because Daenerys herself “went mad.” The script says that civilians being used as human shields are caught in the crossfire as Daenerys is targeting Lannister soldiers in a strategical maneuver right before she heads to the Red Keep to enact revenge on Cersei. However, Daenerys is never described as specifically targeting innocent civilians needlessly.

My thoughts under the cut:

I have to say, that this makes me feel slightly better in a strange way. I mean, it doesn’t erase the bad writing, the ridiculous way the war against the white walkers ended, the misogyny, the inconsistency, etc etc ETC... but this crucial plot point was the one I just couldn’t let go of because it was just baffling to me. With other controversial plot points, I would disagree with them, but I could at least understand what they were going for and what the motivations of the characters were. But Daenerys turning on innocent civilians was truly baffling to me because it comes out of nowhere, is entirely out of character, her motivations are incredibly unclear, and was not set up at all. But with all the fandom discourse, I had really started to think that maybe I am lacking comprehension skills or something. But no, there is actually a reason it made no sense. The “madness” plot line was added later. Emilia Clarke was never given the opportunity to portray Daenerys as mentally unstable. Emilia was portraying grief and revenge on Cersei (as the original script and directors told her to do) in contrast to D&D’s final editing which was portraying the “mad queen.” No wonder it came across as completely false and bewildering- before we even get into the discussion of whether or not this is in character or not.

I think this is definitely more than just a theory that the script was changed pretty late in development because of all the evidence- it is confirmed by Emilia’s commentary, the Visual Effects team member’s commentary, and also the original concept art. But even if there wasn’t all that evidence, there is also the fact that the original ending makes so many other confusing things in Season 8 suddenly make SENSE.

For example, when Jon confronts Daenerys in the throne room and he talks about the women and children that were burned, Daenerys responds with “She used their innocence as a weapon against me.” Which makes total sense for Daenerys to say if she thinks she is talking about civilians that were used as human shields that died in the crossfire. But it doesn’t make any sense if she carpet bombed the city- although it does make her seem delusional, which is probably why Dave and Dan kept those lines in- hoping it would make her appear “mad,” since Emilia was never actually given the opportunity to portray Daenerys as mentally unstable.

There is also the scene where Jon asks Tyrion, “Was it right?” to assassinate Daenerys and Tyrion responds, “Ask me again in ten years.” There is really no reason for them to have that dialogue if Daenerys really did target and massacre innocent civilians. That is the kind of dialogue they would have if they were discussing someone who had done something more morally ambiguous.

Then there are the lines that are out of place in the final version but that would have made complete sense in the original wild fire version, such as Jon saying “now and always” as he stabs Daenerys. “Now and always” as any Theon fan will tell you, is a phrase that belongs to Theon and Robb and what they said to each other when Theon was pledging loyalty to Robb. Having Jon say this to Dany as he is killing Daenerys represents the ultimate betrayal but also calls back to Theon’s struggle and how difficult it is to chose between loyalties- between families. In this case, Jon is choosing the Starks over the Targaryens. Kit Harrington even says that this is motivation in an interview he gave with winteriscoming.net. But given the fact that in the final edit, Daenerys massacred innocent children and civilians on purpose, Kit’s motivation for Jon seems like a relic of an earlier script:

Kit Harrington: “Jon essentially sees it as Daenerys or Sansa and Arya, and that makes his mind up for him. He choose blood over, well, his other blood. But he chooses the people he has grown up with, the people his roots are with, the North. That’s where his loyalties lie in the end. That’s when he puts the knife in.”

And Yara Greyjoy’s lines. She surprisingly remains completely loyal to Daenerys, despite the fact that she massacred the entire city for no reason:

Yara Greyjoy: I swore to follow Daenerys Targaryen.

Sansa Stark: You swore to follow a tyrant.

Yara Greyjoy: She freed us from a tyrant. Cersei is gone because of her, and Jon Snow put a knife in her heart. Let the Unsullied give him what he deserves.

This kind of conversation only seems plausible if they are discussing Daenerys taking out Cersei after she had surrendered and killing human shields in the process, something I can see Yara completely defending- since she was always in favor of attacking King’s Landing as seen during her war counsel scenes in Season 7.

There is also the Emilia Clarke quote in the behind the scenes video HBO put out after the episode where she explains that Dany was targeting Cersei herself:

Emilia Clarke: “It’s just... grief. It’s hurt. And she has this ability to make that hurt a little bit less just for a minute. And here she is, sitting on this ridge and there’s the emotion and there’s the feeling and the feeling is to fucking kill her.”

Note that she does not say “the feeling is to fucking massacre the city,” or “the feeling is to target innocent civilians.” She says “the feeling is to kill her” as in Cersei Lannister- who is responsible for the death of her dragon and Missandei- and who massacred countless innocents herself when she blew up the goddamn sept lol.

Not to mention all of the set up lines between Cersei, Tyrion, and Varys about Cersei using “human shields” which never came to fruition in the final edit, now make complete sense:

Cersei: Keep the gates open. If she wants to take the castle she’ll have to murder thousands of innocents first.

Varys: Tens of thousands of innocents will die. That is why Cersei is bringing them into the Red Keep

And yet, lol, we never actually SEE Daenerys attacking the Red Keep. We never see innocent civilians inside the Red Keep. We only see civilians being massacred in the streets.

I also remember people who had seen the post Season 8 Game of Thrones Live Concert saying that Ramin switched to footage of the other wildfire scenes in past Game of Thrones seasons during his Bells sequence, instead of showing the massacre of innocent civilians by dragon fire. I use to think he did that because Daenerys was his favorite character. But given what we now know about the original ending, he probably chose to show the wildfire scenes because that was what he had specifically written music for before it was changed- the destruction of Kings Landing by wildfire.

I really wish they had kept the original script the way it was. It still would have been an incredibly controversial ending. Daenerys still goes after soldiers and a Queen who is surrendering- and that action unintentionally leads to the destruction of the entire city. Jon Snow still assassinates his lover and betrays one part of his family for the other. But, it would have at least made logical sense. People would have gone back and forth over whether it was in character or whether it was a good ending. But it would have been something people would be able to actually debate on an intellectual level- the way we debate Daenerys crucifying the slavers (who themselves crucified children) or Jon Snow executing Olly... It is a very grey and tragic ending with a lot of moral questions. It still might have gone over like a lead balloon. But... the ending we have is so much worst because it’s nonsensical.

The only reason I can think that they changed it was to make Jon and Tyrion appear less morally grey for plotting Daenerys’ assassination. They probably knew that the ending would be very problematic and were trying to smooth that over by turning Daenerys into a super villain. Yet they did this too late in the process after already showing Daenerys to be heroic in fighting with the north and then having Emilia Clarke finish her filming still believing she was playing a complex and at times ruthless character but not “mad” or “evil.” And then, there is also the intensely problematic issue with them conflating mental illness with mass murdering super villain. Even if it had been clear throughout the entire season that Daenerys was losing her grip on reality and becoming more and more mentally unstable, it still would have been incredibly controversial and I am not entirely sure it would have made the men look any better anyway.

Even though it is tragic af, at least with the original wildfire ending, all of the characters are incredibly complex and morally grey and you can understand the motivations for everything they do, even if you don’t agree with them. For example, if Daenerys attacks Cersei after she surrendered, it is wrong, but it is also completely understandable. And in my opinion, it’s even more understandable when you remember that Cersei cannot be trusted. She can’t be trusted to send her armies to the north- why should Daenerys trust her to surrender in good faith? This kind of ending would also have said something very powerful about unintended consequences. Even though Daenerys did not intend for so many people to die needlessly, they did because war is horrific. And that message becomes even more powerful if her motivations are understandable. But yeah, this kind of ending would have still been hated and debated but... at least the debates would have been more about the story itself rather than everyone trying (and failing) to make sense of what the story even is.

[samclownchester]

The day is June 15 2020

The time is 3 am

The situation is that the world has fallen into a pandemic of Covid-19, and my job closed down in March, leaving me with lots of time on my hands. Despite my doubts, I fell back into Supernatural, deep into it, and I am now rewatching it. I thought it would be fun to try and see how much I could remember from earlier seasons before I watch them all

I have watched up to 1x14 at this point, so those episodes are fresh in my mind, but lets see what else I remember

Season 1

“Dad’s on a hunting trip, and he hasn’t been home in a few days”

“Saving people, hunting things, the family business”

Sam’s girlfriend dies just like his mom did

Their dad is the point of the season but is only actually in like 3 episodes

Sam and Dean break up but get back together

Sam has VISIONS and moves things with his MIND

Meg is a demon, Sam has a bit of a crush on her

They find their dad, but don’t kill the demon

colt

Season 2

Dean dies in a car crash, John sells his soul for him and dies

Bobby Singer is best dad

Ellen and Jo and Ash exist

Purple Nurple

Gordon?

Lots of psychics! Sam can make friends??

Jk, it’s the hunger games

Sam gets stabbed in the back

Dean sells his soul for him

They kill Azazel I think??

“I have … demon blood in me?”

Season 3

Saving Dean from his demon deal

Groundhog day episode where Dean dies everyday

Gabriel?? (trickster)

Blonde Ruby (let’s hear it for Laurel Lance!)

Very short because there was a writers’ strike that year

Hell hounds

Season 4

Dean was “gripped tight and raised from perdition” by Castiel

Sam has a new gf! (Surprise, it’s Ruby in a new body! :o)

Why does she pretend to not know Dean when he first shows up? Is she lying to Sam about who she is this whole time?? Hmmm I wish I remembered

Time travel?? (Sam doesn’t get to come ☹ )

Demon blood

Demon blood detox ☹

Let’s kill Lilith

“Because it had to be you Sam”

“The boy with the demon blood”

Season 5

Dean is the Michael sword

Sam is messed up, trying to quit demon blood

Cas rebelled, and he did it, all of it, for Dean

Adam Winchester is a person who exists

Also I think this is the season with Jesse the antichrist who never shows up again it’s fine.

He only existed so they could have important conversations about nature vs nurture which honestly they should’ve just saved from when Jack was born but they didn’t know that was gonna happen

More time travel??

Future

Cas likes drugs

Team Free Will

Samifer

Fall into the cage

Dean goes to live with Lisa and Ben

The end?

Season 6

Cas is working with Crowley and spying on Dean but not talking to him like the pining idiot that he is

Dean can’t help but inspect monster happenings in town

Soulless!Sam

Dean finds Soulless Sam

Hanging out with some old dude?

Get Sam’s soul back

Meet Death?

Find out Cas is working with Crowley

 O: Ultimate betrayal

???

Season 7

Leviathans

Godstiel?? Why?? Idr

Hallucifer

Please give Sam therapy

Sam goes to an asylum

Cas takes Sam’s trauma??    

More leviathans

Dick?

Charlie!

Kevin!

Garth? Did we know him before. Idk, we know him now

Dean and Cas go to purgatory!

When does Cas die and walk into the lake? That’s before they go to Purgatory, right? Hmmmm but how does he come back

 Cas is Emmanuel and has a wife? Is that in this season?

Season 8

Dean gets out of purgatory!

But no Cas

Sam had a girlfriend and a dog! Nice!

Not nice, he ignored Kevin and didn’t look for Dean

Like they agreed on, but whatever ok sue him for trying to be happy

Dean has a vampire boyfriend

Not so high and mighty about killing every monster are we now, huh Dean?

Right? I don’t remember, this is a conversation that happens though

He does end up killing Benny though, doesn’t he? huh

Cas is back from Purgatory! But he’s got Secrets ™

“I’m gonna become a hunter”

Then he stays in the old folks home and next time we see him he’s all wacky and likes to watch the bees?

Megstiel

You’re just playing sorry

Am I right?? I don’t remember, but all of this happens at some point

Who even is the big bad? What are we fighting? Idk

Oh we have to save Kevin from Crowley and he reads the demon tablet. Only eats hotdogs, doesn’t shave. I love him please keep him safe.

Spoilers, they don’t

Right! The trials, Sam does the trials, they “purify” him

The angels fall, but Sam doesn’t complete the trials and almost dies.

Season 9

Sam almost dies, Dean is like “right, nonconsensual possession is clearly the best answer for this”

Human!Cas, he drinks lots of water. Steve.

§  “you can’t stay here” :o

Abaddon I think?? What was the point

Crowley is sort of our friend now and I think we meet Rowena? Idr

Kevin dies ☹

“What is the upside to me being alive” – Sam

§  Maybe in this season, maybe not. Who knows?

Cas is a cannibal (eats grace) and becomes and angel again at some point

§  Hannah exists

We all hate Metatron

Cain??

Metatron stabs Dean and Sam puts his dead body on the bed

Demon!Dean

Season 10

Demon!Dean and Crowley are living it up!

Sam and Cas try to cure Dean

Charlie and Rowena interact a lot I think

Book of the Damned

When did they find the bunker? Men of Letters? All that? Idr, anyway they have it at this point

Dean kills lots of people

Charlie dies ☹

Dean blames Sam which is unfair and I hate it

They get the mark off and The DarknessTM is release

Season 11

The Baby episode exists

Really weird sexual tension between Dean and Amara while she’s still kind of a child, no one knows why. Please stop.

Cas gets called expendable and then makes poor life decisions

Lbr, though, Misha is the only other one who can play Lucifer with the same spirit as Mark Pellegrino. Sorry Jared, it’s the truth.

Eileen!! <3

Chuck is God :o

Let’s kill Amara!

Except we don’t kill her, she just needs to bond with her bro.

Here, have your mom back

Season 12

Mom????

British Men of Letters

Lucifer F*cks

Boy I didn’t think this would turn into what it did, let me tell you

Winchesters escape from Federal Prison

Cas says “I love you”

But like, the plural you. No homo.

Sam admits he lost his drive to lead, then finds it again and leads hunters against the dang brits! Hooray!

Oh shoot Lucifer wants custody of his kid!

FIGHT

Fatality – Castiel

Fatality – Mary

Oh no wait she didn’t die she’s just trapped.

Season 13

Jack jack jack jack jack

3 dads, all at various levels of dadding

Actually 2 excellent dads, one dad who is too emotionally damaged to dad but he tries sometimes

Yeah Cas pisses of a cosmic entity. That won’t come back to bite him

Jack just wants to be good

Wayward sisters was not picked up which sucks

Apocalypse world

Rowena is our friend now

Custody Battle!!! Who wins? Not Lucifer

We saved the day! And a ton of people

Literally they made a whole deal of the people being like “We won’t leave our home or our cause” and then they got back to Sam and Dean’s world, didn’t have archangel grace and were just like “meh, actually this place is cool. We don’t have to worry about going back”

Psych! We’re not done yet! Luci wants his kid

And Michael wants his planet

Season 14

Michael! Dean

Jack dies

But it’s ok, we fixed you, just don’t use your powers

Oh shoot he used his power

Nick is somehow alive

In love with Lucifer

Burn his ass!!

Oh Mary disapproves

RIP Mary

RIP Dean being a father, now he’s gonna murder

Hi Chuck, nice of you to show up

Oh no.

Season 15

Chuck sucks

Dean and Cas break up ☹

Sam has visions again

But he’s not psychic, it’s just the piece of his soul inside Chuck

Resurrect your girlfriend! Yeah!!

Jack is eating hearts, but it’s ok, Death told him to do it.

Garden of Eden?

Get your soul back boy!

 And cry

Honorable mentions (Aka these happened but idr when)

Sam falls in love with a werewolf and then has to kill her and MAN Jared really brought the tears

AU where Supernatural is a TV show

Finding out Supernatural is a book series and the author is Chuck!

Crowley becomes helpful mostly

Crowley has a son??

 Meet grandpa

Ellen, Jo, and Ash die

Bobby dies

literally everybody dies

Kill Hitler

They meet that Jewish guy with the Golem who pretended to flirt with Dean at some point.

Jimmy Novak was a devout man who deserved a lot better than he got

Claire Novak is so cool

She moves in with Jody

When do we meet Jody? She’s just always kinda been there?

Gabriel, I don’t remember anything about Gabriel

The council of the Gods’ happens and then I think Gabriel dies in that episode?? Idr

The Four Horsemen

Death, Pestilence, War, Famine

“You’re not hungry Dean”

 I literally do not remember what was happening with these guys

Also, they killed Death, killed a reaper, that reaper became the new Death. I remember when all that happened I just didn’t feel like putting it in the timeline.

[kittymaverick]

MCF: Black Crown commentary  part 2 and overall review.

 Spoilers! Though I’m going to post the spoiler free quick review up here.

Another great MCF game, I dare say, despite me constantly having to look away because of my fear of skulls. I’m a little sad that somethings weren’t explored a bit deeper, but overall the plot fits the MCF series, the art was of good quality, the puzzles were of the right difficulty. Not sure when and what the next game is, but I look forward to it if the quality keeps up!

1. [And then the walkthrough spent a full 5 minutes on a complex door puzzle] I was wondering when those would show up. MD: ...I’m more surprised no one sneaked up on me while I was going about this...

2. MD: Hm, maybe I should light this thing-- *Lights the entire passage way* Great, now they know we are here! MD: ...I was never meant to be stealthy, you know...

3. That’s... a somewhat floating ship, albeit on chains. MD: Seriously, they sailed that thing back from Louisiana?! What were they going to do instead, take a plane?

4. Girl: Hi there, also, look what I have. Doctor and Nurse: Help? MD: I KNEW IT. NOW WE HAVE A HOSTAGE CRISIS. Guess we aren’t deviating too far from classic MCF blunders after all.

5. Phineas: Let’s parley! MD: Sure! Give me the doctor and nurse, and I won’t burn your whole estate and ship down down. ...And the girl? MD: He can keep her. If there’s anything I’ve learnt, is leave no survivors to take revenge. Doctor and Nurse: Detective, no.

6. Phineas: Anyway, fix my ship until it’s seaworthy, and they go free, deal? MD: You’re gonna renegade anyway so is there even a point in me agreeing? Phineas: The other ghosts were right, you really are a spoilsport. MD: I’ll also like to point out you have at least 11 conscious subordinates to do your bidding still. Surely THEY can do SOMETHING.

7. A... tavern. MD: The fact that this is the first time I’ve seen a tavern surprises me. That’s a weird, sea monster, thingy, up there...

8. MD, please tell me you’re coming up with a plan to redrown this ghost, again. MD: Hm.... MD, please... MD: I mean, I’m thinking of a word that begins with m, can you guess what it is? Murder? MD: ...I was going more for mutiny, but sure, murder works too.

9. You know, one thing that’s nice about Phineas as a villain is he shuts up and let you do the work. MD: Ah, the sound of a tense peace and quiet... that is not at all pleasing. Time to blow some stuff up just so we can disturb it some. Wait WE’RE IN A CAVE--

10. [One controlled detonation and a ship released later...] MD: Okay, now hand over those hostages! Phineas: Bargain’s fulfilled. You can have them back. MD: ...What, really?! Phineas: I’m just missing some treasure though. Well, more like ONE PIECE (ahaha, ahem, sorry). My sword is missing. Can you get that for me? I’ll release the girl. MD: One, why would I even want that when she wants me dead? Two, I’m pretty sure that mutiny happened in the Americas. How on earth would the sword be here in England-- Phineas: I said A mutiny, not THE mutiny. MD: ...Oh. Still, do I have to rescue the girl? Doctor and nurse: Um, YES?! MD: Oh FINE, I’ll go play the hero... Phineas: I’ll be waiting in the captain’s quarters. MD: ...One, that sounded VAGUELY suggestive, two, you’re going to sink me with you, aren’t you?

11. MD: BTW, you two are taking this ghost pirate ship thing insanely well. Nurse: Um, we DO work at Manchester asylum, for one thing. Doctor: That and we’ve had to deal with you, once upon a time. MD: ...right, that, explains everything.

12. MD: Okay, that’s a lot of treasure on the boat. Maybe you can ask Her Majesty to loan us the army on account of rescuing some treasure? MD: She likes stories better. Awww.

13. Hm, a curse and a priestess... wonder who that priestess might be... MD: At this point, it could be any of the supernatural beings I’ve encountered.

14. Another skill the MD has: diving. MD: Can’t believe all those licensing lessons are paying off.

15. MD: Okay, got your sword! You can spring your trap now! [Ship sails away from the dock] MD: ...That’s one way to isolate your enemy, I guess. Maybe you should check for gunpowder before seeing the captain? MD: I really should do that, shouldn’t I?

16. [Inside captain’s quarters] Doctor and Nurse: Hi. MD: ...SERIOUSLY??? WHY DID YOU COME ON BOARD?! Phineas: Ahem, so the girl? MD: Yeah yeah, give her to the doctor, I don’t care. Phineas: Good! Off ye go, lass, and welcome aboard as my new crew hand, detective! MD: .............Haha, real funny-- Doctor: Remember that contract you signed? That was the service contract. Also, thanks to you, we’re immortal now. MD: ...I fucking knew that paper wasn’t just something random, AND ALSO OF THIS INEVITABLE BETRAYAL! *clench fist* Oh, as for immortality... I’ve got my feather, all good, no thanks.

16. Doctor: So long as the ship sails and we’re on board, we’ll have an eternity to enjoy them! MD: ...Okay, thanks for telling me how to stop you. Time to look for those powder kegs! Phineas: Damn minions, why can’t they keep their mouth shut.

17. Crew member... something: Find me some navigation charts! Another Crew member: I need a new target to throw at! MD: What am I, your servant?! Phineas: Well, judging by the contract, ya probably are. MD: ...You are going to love what I’m about to serve all of you. At least it wasn’t a prenuptial contract or the like, right?

18. Crew member I’ve-lost-count: Thanks for the extra hand! ...I guess they’re still a little insane after all... MD: Not sure if that’s a good thing or bad thing... Crew another: I need to feed the bird, but the bird isn’t here... but I need to feed the bird, but-- MD: ...Let’s go with good for now.

19. [Fire a canon] Phineas: Which one of you did that?! MD: *whistles and goes downstairs*

20. MD: He... stored her remains in the FIGUREHEAD??? ...Wow, at least it wasn’t you, right? MD: Not at all helping!

21. MD: Got all the needles, now... HEY PHINEAS! Phineas: Wha? MD: I got a bunch of needles, and guess who’s gonna get stabbed? Phineas: Traitor! This is mutiny! MD: In seriousness, did you really expect me to serve you willingly? Phineas: No, but I didn’t expected you to be this stupid and try to rebel so early! MD: Oh you bloody... *Stabs doll like crazy*

22. Phineas: Wait until I’m free! I’ll rain all the wrath upon ya! MD: Nice try, now I’m going to take the crown, and also this other thing from you... now stay still while I go break the curse. Phineas: You will regret this! MD: I already don’t regret this! 8D I think for once, the MD might be having a bit too much fun tormenting their foe. 23. Phineas: NOOOOO MY SHIP!!!! MD: Off the sides, everyone! Take your leave before it’s too late-- AAAAHHHHH. You would think the voodoo priestess would be nicer and not drop you into the ocean like that. MD: I’m just thankful I’m alive, honestly. Girl: Also, thank you for saving me. MD: ... Dammit I didn’t exactly mean to do that... Oh well, just, please don’t come after me again. My life insurance is getting worse with each attempt. Phineas: *cackles from under water* MD: Oh shut up you ectoplasmic goop. I need another vacation-- Hey, a letter from Louisiana! Time for that American holiday, right MD? MD: *sighs*

[Extra content start here!]

24. So, guy’s got horucruxes. MD: What’s up with people putting pieces of their souls into stuff, huh? It mostly explains their state of mind, to be honest.

25. Only death can find you... creepy... MD: I mean, they’re not wrong. Death’s almost found me many times. And actually did find me that one time...

26. OOOOOHHHH that’s the shopkeeper’s body alright... MD: Welp, guess I’m on my own, plus that southern guy out there. Southern guy: Oh, she’s dead? Well, then I’m out. Keep the amulet to protect yourself! MD: Yes please, I no longer do search and rescues. At least not unless it’s paid well.

27. AAAHHHH TREE MONSTER THINGY! MD: AMULET PROTECT ME PUT THE JAW BACK PUT IT BACK *Thing collapses into dust* MD: ...Oh that was easy. Yeah, guess that’s over-- FLYING SKULL FLYING SKULL MAKE IT GO AWAY! (Kitty has nearly passed out from too much skull exposure at this point)

28. MD: Okay, into the crypt-- oh that’s a lot of skulls (Kitty once again passes out from too many skulls...)

29. Ghost: Heard you hate Phineas too, so we’re gonna help you get him. MD: Great! How do I-- Ghost: Just gotta find his skull among all the skulls here, good luck. MD: ... (Kitty is just gone) MD: Welp fuck me.

30. Ghost: Assemble the four great pirate elements! Wade: Teeth! Terrel: Tentacle! Joe: Eye! Wayne: Pistol! Ghosts: Together we are...! MD: ...A match-3 puzzle??? REALLY????????? Thank you for not making it skulls...

31. MD: FOUND YOU. GET OVER HERE AND BURN TO ASH! Phineas: Ehehe, you missed a tooth! MD: ...fuck.

[recentanimenews]

Wave, Listen to Me! – 09 – The Ecstasy and Agony of the Man-Child

When Minare gets a friendly text from Mitsuo after her bear attack broadcast, her first instinct is to borrow Mizuho’s laptop so she can Google “how to buy a gun” (much tougher in Japan than the U.S.) with which to shoot him as she promised herself.

Mizuho calls for amiability, which Minare translates as “murder him socially instead via doxxing.” When Matou and Mizuho both pooh-pooh that idea, Minare agrees to a date at Mt. Moiwa…with no apparent plan in place. Her only prep involves an “aggessive” outfit and dark red lips, knowing he prefers light pink. It’s the little things!

No doubt Minare’s first question going into the date is “what gives with the sudden contact after months of nothing?” and in that regard, it’s fitting that her outfit includes a sleuthy fedora. It should be noted that Minare has possibly never looked hotter than she does here, and that’s definitely intentional. It’s provocative, yet also self-conscious.

When they first meet up, she can’t help but blush while thinking how he hasn’t changed a bit. It hasn’t been that long, Minare! He then proceed to throw her off-balance, first by paying for his cable car ticket (1700 ye/person—not cheap!), then offering up her favorite torimon, and then handing her a brown envelope containing 250,000 yen, half of what he owes her. What gives, indeed!

While pondering the possibility of becoming ensnared in an eternal limbo of debt repayment, Minare’s first word in edgewise is an accusation of infidelity by Mitsuo (she heard from a friend he was walking with another girl). That’s when Mitsuo owns up to the fact he indeed befriended a girl, but totally glosses over the particulars of that relationship and goes straight to the story of her trying to stab him.

Mitsuo is hungry and wants curry, and lets it be known by a kind of specific man-child whine that has an almost Pavlovian effect on Minare. However shlumpy this guy looks and how possibly insincere he’s acting, it’s obvious Minare had legitimate feelings for this guy, and there are parts of him that are still thoroughly disarming.

Here’s someone who planned to kill him when he became an abstract bogeyman, but now, in the reality of their reunion and his M.C.T. (Man Child Terror) field, her homicidal designs all but evaporate. Yet once she hears the details of Mitsuo’s brush with death, it doesn’t take long for Detective Koda Minare to forge a theory about the other woman’s motive: she must have also lent Mitsuo money.

There’s a constant push-and-pull going on throughout Minare and Mitsuo’s date that is both all-too-realistic and extremely fascinating. The pain of his past betrayal and her suspicion over his present motives is always on one end of the scale, rising and falling from prominence as Mitsuo works his practiced Suga charm.

Minare is happy and excited to just be on another date again, after much drinking alone, and self-commiserating, and breaking-and-entering of Oki’s place. She even considers the possibility that even a creature like Mitsuo could change for the better after nearly being offed by the latest victim of his adorkably breezy treachery.

For all his faults, Mitsuo is Minare’s type, whether he’s being “cute”, commenting on her lip color, suggesting they do one activity after the other, demonstrating growth by paying his fair share, or telling her the words “there’s no one better than you.” It must feel so good for her hear words like that from someone with whom she’s shared so much history, both good and bad.

Minare is sufficiently hungry for domestic affection that she slips easily back into the comfort and familiarity of Mitsuo’s place, even reflexively making coffee when they’ve already had a ton of it throughout the day. She also takes comfort in his very specific preferences, like what drink goes best with what food.

But when Mitsuo toasts their reunion and “reconciliation”, Minare’s dormant rage re-surfaces, vowing to keep her heart shut tight until the full amount is paid back. He assures her he borrowed it to be a co-signer for a friend’s debt and always meant to pay her back.

Having presented himself as a Good Guy who helps people in need, Mitsuo’s head finds Minare’s thighs, which he admits he’s missed dearly. Minare, in turn, fishes out the ear pick she left there which is so beloved she gave it a name—Onikirimaru!—and proceeds to clean Mitsuo’s ears “for her own sake and pleasure!”

Since it’s been a while since they’ve done this, she’s elated to find a “gold rush” in there. How adorably disgusting! Not to mention intimate. And despite having planned to kill him only yesterday, she still falls for his upside-down face as he once again points out his preference in lip color, and Minare removes the deep red with a tissue.

It is here, where Minare realizes how Mitsuo’s Man-Child nature seemingly encourages her to take the lead while in reality making her the subservient one. It’s a shtick he probably does without even thinking. But the spell is immediately broken when she spots a strange bit of trash when tossing her tissue.

After a sip of coffee, Mitsuo references the “coffee kiss” they’d often do another lovely detail that speaks to the specific intimacy of these two people. Minare leans down for a kiss, but stops mere inches from his lips. Suddenly, she’s Detective Koda again, she has Mitsuo in the box, and he’s not getting out until she’s heard the truth from his un-coffee-kissed lips.

He admits he lost the 500k at the tracks, but came into the 250k after helping out the relative of a rich oil executive (again implying his charitable good-guy nature). Minare admonishes him for his get-rich-quick nature, urging him to live more frugally by, for instance, learning to cook.

It’s a lure the Man-Child can’t resist; he assures her everything will be fine; why should he cook when there’s so many good, cheap restaurants? Quite literally taking matters into her own thighs, Detective Koda locks Mitsuo’s face in a leg-lock and shows him the suspicious piece of trash: a free magazine full of recipes with a single dried bell pepper seed stuck to the cover.

It’s evidence not just that someone interested in cooking was in the room, but made Mitsuo’s favorite stir-fry recipe, indicating an intimacy with the other woman he had been concealing from her. No need for a judge or jury; in Minare’s eyes, Mr. Suga is guilty. His sentence is what must be some kind of professional wrestling throw that drives his head hard into the floor.

No longer under the influence of Mitsuo’s smile after seeing him lie once more while wearing it, Detective Koda puts her fedora back on and tells him she’ll forgive the remaining half of the money she lent him. It’s preferable to letting him to betray yet another woman to pay him back.

While she harbored abstractly (and ultimately impossible) murderous designs prior to their reunion, this Minare is wiser and more level-headed in her condemnation and handing down of punishment. Mitsuo may be glad to be off the hook for the 250k, but if he was being honest when he said there’s “no one better” than Minare, her refusing to take him back is harsh punishment indeed.

This episode was a thrilling, layered, ultimately bittersweet tour-de-force depicting the games played, battles fought, and lies told behind easy smiles and flirtations of two people. You really get the feeling Minare would prefer being in a happy loving relationship with Mitsuo, but she just can’t trust the bastard, and there’s no indication he’ll ever stop fucking up and lying about it.

As Minare enjoys a decisive moral and tactical victory, the episode doesn’t overlook the bitter tragedy of that. If she’s the hard-boiled private dick in an old noir crime novel, Mitsuo is the “homme fatale”. In the end, her loyalty to the truth and her solidarity with women prevailed.

By: sesameacrylic

[historybehindassassinscreed]

In Game:

Lucrezia Borgia was the illegitimate daughter of Rodrigo Borgia, and the younger sister of Cesare Borgia. She was a member of the Templar Order, and later became the Duchess of Ferrara.

In January of 1500, Lucrezia accompanied her brother, Cesare Borgia, in his siege of Monteriggioni. During the battle, the Borgia were able to capture Caterina Sforza and Mario Auditore. Afterwards, Lucrezia returned to Rome with her brother and his generals, holding an Apple of Eden as their prize.

In 1501, she escorted the captive Caterina Sforza to prison cells within the Castel Sant'Angelo. There, Cesare briefly visited Lucrezia, and the two exchanged an intimate moment. After they kissed, Cesare promised Lucrezia that when he ruled all of Italy, she would be his queen.

Soon afterwards, Lucrezia confronted Caterina in her cell, where she jealously demanded to know of Caterina's trip to Rome with Cesare. Caterina only spat an insult in reply, and Lucrezia struck her violently with a metal rod, injuring her hip.

However, after Lucrezia had taken the cell's key from the prison guard and left, the Assassin Ezio Auditore da Firenze arrived to rescue Caterina. He sought Lucrezia out in the castello garden to retrieve the key, where she recognized and greeted him, before alerting the guards to his presence.

Though Lucrezia ran from him, the Assassin eventually caught her and brought her back to the prison chamber, despite her trying to bite him and anger him with tales of how Lorenzo de' Medici had erased the Pazzi family from history for their betrayal. Once the cell was unlocked, Lucrezia tried calling for the guards again, only for Caterina to knock her out by slamming her head against the door frame and then lock her in the prison.

On August 18th, 1503, Lucrezia found out her father had taken possession of her supply of cantarella poison from the Castel Sant'Angelo. When she subsequently heard that Cesare was also meeting with her father that day, she immediately realized Rodrigo's intentions.

Hurrying to the Papal apartments, Lucrezia entered just in time to discover Cesare eating an apple that Rodrigo had left out for him, and was able to warn him of the poison within it before he had eaten too much.

Furious at the attempt on his life, Cesare forced the rest of the apple down Rodrigo's throat, all the while demanding the Pope to tell him the location of the Apple of Eden. Lucrezia, in an attempt to save her father, yelled to Cesare that she knew where it was hidden.

Cesare went on to threaten her instead, seizing her by the throat and rebuking any of her attempts to calm him. Tearfully, she asked him if he had ever loved her, but Cesare only answered that he saw her as his sister and nothing more. At this, she spat in his face, and was only slapped and further choked as he continued to interrogate her.

Ezio, who had watched the scene unfold from outside a window, rushed to Lucrezia's aid, but reached her only moments after she had given in to Cesare's demands. Lucrezia watched as Ezio paid Rodrigo his last respects and closed his eyes, before deciding to inform him of the Apple's location as well.

In 1506, Lucrezia was visited once again by Ezio Auditore, who sought her out inside her palazzo. At first, she calmly asked him if he was there to take her life, but he only answered that he was there for the da Vinci paintings that had been taken by the Borgia during the siege of Monteriggioni.

Lucrezia refused to give them to him, and suggested that they "comfort" each other. Ezio appeared to agree and seduced her, thus she decided to tell him the locations of the paintings he needed, as well as give him the only one she had kept. However, as they kissed, Ezio tied Lucrezia to the curtains of the room, before swiftly leaving. Lucrezia cried for her guards, but the Assassin was able to escape with the last da Vinci painting she owned, leaving a very annoyed Lucrezia behind. 

In Real Life:

Lucrezia Borgia was born on April 18, 1480, the daughter of Rodrigo Borgia (later to become Pope Alexander VI) and his mistress Vannozza Cattanei, who was also the mother of Lucrezia's two older brothers, Cesare and Giovanni.  Nobody believed for one moment that the child’s father was Vannozza’s husband, as Vannozza had been Borgia’s favorite mistress for many years.  Lucrezia was slender with light blue-green eyes and golden hair, which she later bleached to maintain its goldenness.

Adriana daMila, Rodrigo’s cousin, was said to have raised Lucrezia. While living in a palace in Rome, Lucrezia was educated at the Convent of St. Sixtus on Via Appia. Lucrezia reportedly spoke and wrote several languages, among them Italian, French, Latin, and Greek. She was also taught music, singing, and drawing, which enabled her to move with ease in the highest court circles. Her education is common for a woman of her social stature but uncommon for someone of her gender. Unlike educated women of her time, hers came from within the sphere of intellectuals in court and close relatives. For most women who wanted to be educated, convents were the primary source for knowledge.

She was also rumored to have been sexually abused by her father and brothers.

Lucrezia was married for the first time before entering her teenage years. She was engaged to one nobleman and then another before her father had the engagements dissolved so that he could arrange for her to be married to Giovanni Sforza, 15 years her senior, who was Lord of Pesaro and Count of Catignola. At the time of Lucrezia’s marriage to Sforza, her husband was twenty-seven and she was twelve.

Four years later, Lucrezia's marriage became less politically advantageous, and Pope Alexander VI sought to have it annulled under the pretense of the relationship never having been consummated, although that is a matter of debate. Sforza had also accused Lucrezia of paternal incest.

Giovanni Sforza was offered her dowry in return for his cooperation of the divorce. The Sforza family threatened to withdraw their protection should he refuse. Giovanni finally signed confessions of impotence and documents of annulment before witnesses.

In 1498, while she was living within the San Sisto convent after the end of her marriage, Lucrezia fell in love with one of her father's messengers, Perotto Calderon. Reports of her pregnancy were initially refuted, but in March 1498 a son, Giovanni, was born in secret (he wouldn’t be publically revealed until three years later). Lucrezia was eighteen at the time of her first son’s birth. Rumors circulated around the child, gossip around Rome debating whether he was the product of incest, or whether Lucrezia was truly his mother. His paternity was acknowledged by both Alexander and Cesare in two separate Papal bulls.

(Image source)

Later on that year, in July of 1498, Lucrezia married Alfonso of Aragon, the 17-year-old Duke of Bisceglie and son of the late king of Naples, and they had a child together (Rodrigo of Aragon, who was born in 1499 and predeceased his mother in August 1512 at the age of 12). Unfortunately for Alfonso, by 1500, Pope Alexander and Lucrezia’s brother Cesare sought a new alliance with France, and Lucrezia's marriage to Alfonso was a major obstacle.

On July 15th, 1500, hired killers attacked Alfonso, stabbing him several times. On August 18th, as Alfonso was recovering, Cesare Borgia reportedly sent hired men to strangle Alfonso to death as he lay recovering from his previous stab wounds.

Left a widow at the age of twenty, Lucrezia spent most of her time weeping over the loss of her husband. Tired of watching her mourn, her father and brother sent her to Nepi in the Etruscan Hills. On her return to Rome in November 1500, she began assisting her father as a sort of secretary, often opening and responding to his mail when he was not in residence.

Once again politics determined Lucrezia's marriage to the twenty-four-year-old widower Alfonso d'Este, eldest son of Ercole d'Este, Duke of Ferrara, when Lucrezia was twenty two. She had eight children during this marriage and was considered a respectable and accomplished Renaissance duchess, effectively rising above her previous reputation and surviving the fall of the Borgias following her father's death.

Neither partner was faithful: beginning in 1503, Lucrezia enjoyed a long relationship with her brother-in-law, Francesco II Gonzaga, Marquess of Mantua. Francesco's wife was the cultured intellectual Isabella d'Este, the sister of Alfonso, to whom Lucrezia had made overtures of friendship to no avail. The affair between Francesco and Lucrezia was passionate, more sexual than sentimental as can be attested in the fevered love letters the pair wrote one another. The affair ended when Francesco contracted syphilis and had to end sexual relations with Lucrezia.

Several rumors have persisted throughout the years, primarily speculating as to the nature of the extravagant parties thrown by the Borgia family. Many of these concern allegations of incest, poisoning, and murder on her part; however, no historical basis for these rumors has ever been brought forward beyond allegations made by rival parties 

(Image source)

After a long history of complicated pregnancies and miscarriages, on June 14th, 1519 Lucrezia gave birth to her tenth child, named Isabella Maria in honor of Alfonso's sister Isabella d'Este. The child was sickly and – fearing she would die unbaptized – Alfonso ordered her to be baptized straightaway with Eleonora della Mirandola and Count Alexandro Serafino as godparents.

Lucrezia had become very weak during the pregnancy and fell seriously ill after the birth. After seeming to recover for two days, she worsened again and died on June 24th the same year, when she was 39. She was buried in the convent of Corpus Domini.

Sources:

https://www.biography.com/people/lucrezia-borgia-9220136

http://www.nationalgeographic.com/archaeology-and-history/magazine/2017/01-02/lucrezia-borgia-renaissance-italy-scandal-intrigue/

http://www.notablebiographies.com/Be-Br/Borgia-Lucrezia.html

https://www.theguardian.com/books/2004/oct/24/biography.features

[p5spoilersblog]

on goro akechi v2 ft screenshot evidence because people are misinterpreting like everything about him & spreading misinfo

1. He got his persona powers 2.5 years earlier than the rest of the cast, and that’s important. He was a lonely child who had gone through life with absolutely no one, having to be constantly reminded that no one ever wanted him. He had nothing in his heart but resentment for Shido because he didn’t know anything else. He approached Shido and offered to use his berserk powers(no murder involved) with the intent of stabbing him in the back later because he had nothing else to lose.

2. Shadow Shido openly brags about being the reason he was using his powers to kill, because they were Shido’s orders to begin with.

Shido also talks about continuing to use the cognitive world for evil, even when he had planned to have Akechi killed right after the election.

3. There was no way he could’ve known about the power to change hearts. Morgana is expressly the one who told Joker and Ryuji about it. Without Morgana, they wouldn’t have known. They had to take extra precaution to not trigger a mental shutdown in Kamoshida, because the method to it is pretty obtuse. There’s 2 points in the game where’s he upset about not having known about it earlier:

4. The mental shutdowns weren’t his idea, they were the orders of Shido and his political buddies. 

Here’s a compilation of evidence from the cruise ship of that: http://imgur.com/a/VE61s

So, yes, well established that everything was on Shido’s orders.

No, this doesn’t mean he’s 100% free of having to deal with the consequences of his actions, because he isn’t. He’s both a perpetrator and a victim, the game straight up calls him this.

The bulk of the blame should go to the person who actually wanted them dead rather than the hitman. In this case, the hitman was an abused kid who was in a do or die situation. No, the hitman is not totally innocent, this isn’t the point of this post.

(It’s worth nothing that if Shido wanted someone dead he more than likely would’ve found a way even if Akechi had tried to walk away. This is almost directly implied, as Shido talks about continuing to use the cognitive world after the election, when if everything had gone his way, he would’ve killed Akechi at that point anyway, as evidenced earlier in this post).

Here Shido offers a deal to the thieves, after Akechi was presumed dead, confirming that cognitive world things are going on with or without him. Along with a “those who disobey me must be eliminated.” The connection here is obvious.

In the text chat they have about him after sending the calling card, Haru says she thinks he was a victim too, Anne says he was a victim they couldn’t save. Ryuji says that while he can’t forgive him, he forgives Shido even less for warping him so badly. Makoto agrees with Ryuji. Morgana says that Akechi helped them all out in the end.

This should be obvious, his infiltration of the PT and assassination of Joker were on Shido’s orders. The first thing he does after Joker’s supposed death is call Shido and says that it’s done. The SIU director shows up occasionally talking to Shido on the phone talking about how their evil plan is going swimmingly, and at one point he even says “an idea so atrocious had to come from you(Shido).” Akechi was just a convenient tool to make that happen.

(The above cap is even before they learn that Shido was Akechi’s father).

It’s also worth noting that he got his powers earlier than the rest for a reason. As Lavenza revealed, he was cherry picked to be the one to oppose Joker. Akechi says that “be it god or demon, I finally had a chance” when he was talking about his revenge against Shido. Which, is fitting, considering Yaldabaoth chose him because he was a lonely kid with nothing but resentment in his heart. He had nothing to lose, he had no way of knowing how to change hearts, of course he went after Shido and made it worse for himself. It was rigged against him from the start.

To understand a bit more about the way he was treated and why he lashed out, I advise to read about the stigma of illegitimate kids in Japan and the treatment of orphans in Japan.

He was a child who had known absolutely nothing but neglect and abuse his entire life; he was a child who was at the tender age of 14-15 when he approached Shido. He wanted to lash out and didn’t have the means to do so. And because of who his father was, because he had absolutely no way of knowing how to change hearts, he could only make it worse for himself. He didn’t decide “I hate my dad so I’m gonna go kill people to get his attention” he decided, “I hate my dad and have absolutely nothing to lose so I’m going to approach him and try to backstab him later and get myself into a situation where I would either have to die or commit atrocities to keep on going.” (It’s unclear whether he knew that Shido would have him use his powers to kill. Shadow Shido brags about being the reason for it, though, as evidenced earlier).

And no, he isn’t without regret. 

Also, this Leblanc conversation post Okumura death.

The Leblanc conversation there also stands out because he goes on about it being the one place of comfort he had.

He wasn’t being 100% fake all the time. Morgana points out that he actually did like Joker, and it was true. That was the line that finally set him into full blown tantrum mode after his first boss fight. (The localization translated that as “You don’t hate Joker” when it should’ve been something more like “You cared for/grew fond of/liked Joker.)” (He also says that it helps that Sojiro treats him just like any other customer, which sticks out because he’s probably not used to being treated like an actual human being).

I think a lot of people’s problems is that they see him before and immediately after betrayal(when he’s talking to Shido) and think this means everything post betrayal was his “real self.” It wasn’t, he hates Shido, he wanted to ruin Shido, the evil villain act he put on in front of Shido was just as much of an act as he put on on TV. 

He openly laments that they couldn’t have met a few years earlier, because that’s the big difference between him and the PT. While the PT had each other and other people in their lives when they awakened their powers, Akechi had absolutely no one. He had gone through his entire life all by himself and thought he was fine on his own because he thought he could never have anyone accept him for who he actually is. And this goes well past the hitman working for Shido thing. He also thought that no one would accept him if they knew about his birth or his past; as said before, in Japan, being an illegitimate kid is highly stigmatized. In his TV monologue in the cruise ship, he thinks about that fact that none of the people in the audience know he’s an “unwanted child.” And the game makes a point of his fans turning on him whenever he made mistakes. Even the girl in your class who was always going on about how handsome he is said she was embarrassed to be his fan. The public is fickle, and didn’t care about him much or at all to begin with, just the mask he put on in front of them.

He thought he could never have real bonds because of his upbringing.

5. Shido would’ve killed him if he had tried to walk away. This is established after this line, after Shido was telling him to go “deal with anyone [Akechi finds] suspicious.” Akechi replied to this by saying that they should wait a week until after the election, after in Akechi’s mind, he wouldn’t have to listen to Shido anymore. (He was trying to stall)

“Do you know what it means to defy me?” is also a valid translation here. Right here it’s established that if he had tried to walk away, he would’ve been killed.

It’s also worth noting that Akechi said that as if he was terrified to question him.

No, I’m not saying he did nothing wrong at all. The fact that he did it at all disqualifies him from doing nothing wrong, but, it’s important to consider how little of a choice he had in his actions.

His real thief outfit is one striped like a prison outfit, with belts binding his limbs. The symbolism there is obvious.

The Design Works description for Loki is also worth bringing up:

"Loki's true form is unknown. I gave him a design in which you can't tell if more of the pattern is white or black, and I had thought of and considered giving him this feeling of not being able to tell which side he was on. The design motif is the "dazzle camoflauge" (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dazzle_camouflage) that was used on WWI warships. The camoflauge was meant to make the size and shape of the warship difficult to discern. In addition to that, the horns that protrude from the eyes I based off a snail parasite, and it emphasizes the unpleasantness of this feeling of not knowing where the individual['s true self] is (like where the parasite ends and the host begins, I presume). I thought it might interesting if people could get this feeling of "who is the real you?", as Akechi might say.”

How little independence he actually had is the entire point.

6. Shido, deep down, knew Akechi was his son and used that to manipulate him. Shido says he suspected as much because Akechi resembles his mother. Shido admits to using his childish need for acceptance and praise to manipulate him(which also ties back into his lonely upbringing), it’s why Akechi thought that Shido trusted him. Like I said in the last post, he’s a worst case scenario for the subject matter the entire game covers - someone who was in a situation where he couldn’t do anything about ends up walking down the same path as his abusers when given the means to do something, because he had no positive influences or support system to know what to do otherwise. He had no way of knowing what to do.

He was a child who was abused and manipulated just as(if not moreso) by rotten adults just as everyone in the PT was. In the end, he wasn’t so different from them. The main difference is that he was cherry picked by a false god to be set on a bad path from the start.

If you wanna take all of this and say “cool motive, still murder” then fine. But, context is everything, especially when in context, he was in a do or die situation where he had to act as a hitman for the person who actually wanted the targets dead. Especially when the entire game is about abusive power dynamics, especially when it comes to the power adults have over the youth. Him being the only teenage antagonist is very, very relevant. It’s almost appalling how many people I see list a number of reasons to vehemently hate Akechi and then list Shido off in a passing “yeah that guy was a dick I guess” because that’s deliberately missing the point. In the end, he wasn’t so different than the PT. He was abused and manipulated by the rotten adults just as much(if not more so). The same rotten adult that also had a hand in the lives of other party members, even.

You don’t have to like him, you don’t even have to feel sympathy for him, but, the amount of people I’ve seen that nigh have to be deliberately misinterpreting his situation is kind of exhausting.

He goes after the PT in the cruise ship only after he learns that they were going after Shido. A big character fault is his pride, and he said how he wanted to be the one to “personally take responsibility for Masayoshi Shido by thrusting him into a living hell.” It was his literal life’s mission. He admitted he was jealous of Joker; he said that he was jealous because Joker’s heart was always free, and his wasn’t. He saw Joker as the epitome of everything he could never have; someone who was surrounded by comrades who cared about him and could be acknowledged as heroes. He clung to his want for revenge against Shido, he clung to his false fame because it brought him the praise and attention he’d been denied his whole life. His childish want for love & praise was another very fatal character flaw. Which, again, ties into his traumatic upbringing.

Then, in come Cognitive Akechi. Cognitive Akechi informs the real Akechi that Shido was going to kill him right after the election anyway, because he never had Shido’s trust to begin with. He never would’ve been able to take Shido down alone. He thought he was fine on his own because loneliness was the only thing he’d ever known.

He realized what an idiot he was, he calls himself just that. He never could’ve done anything alone. Cognitive Akechi then gives him another chance to be the person Shido wants him to be.

And he turns around and shoots cognitive Goro, raises the partition wall, and says that if they had tried to fight cognitive Goro and his shadows while protecting him in his injured state and making sure he doesn’t get killed, they would’ve all been annihilated. He gave his life for the people that shattered his belief that the only way he could ever be accepted if he was putting on an act, in a final standoff against the manifestation of the puppet he used to be, and removed himself from the cycle of abuse instead of letting it go on any longer.

He was finally able to let go off his want for revenge and false flame he clung to because it brought him the praise and admiration he’d been denied so heavily as a child. Because in the end, he wasn’t so different from the rest of them, the difference was that he was cherry picked by a false god to be the bad guy. His death was nigh the only choice he’d ever been able to make for himself.

omake: his angry critical cutin and black actual outfit fit in far better with the PT than his white princely outfit and p3/p4 style cutin ever did

[darlingpetao3]

For Asgard (Chapter 4/?)

It all really began when Loki was only a boy. His father, Odin, The Allfather, had brought up the matter of becoming a King. Loki knew he would rule Asgard one day, he was sure of it.

But so was his brother, Thor.

A brother so boisterous, pompous, and always ready to fight. Loki's complete opposite.

Because Loki was a quiet, studious, and far more intelligent than his brother.

Odin once said to the two boys, “Asgard brings peace to the universe and the day will come when one of you will have to defend that peace.” Each of the brothers was sure it would be him. Loki couldn't imagine Thor being a king fit for Asgard even in the slightest.

“A wise king never seeks out war, but he must always be ready for it,” Odin had said. Knowing Thor, he would always be seeking out war. It was simply in him. If he wasn't fighting someone, then he couldn't be his 'mighty' self. Loki took his father's words to heart, focusing on the latter half of his speech. Throughout the years, Loki read up on battle strategy. It reminded him of his favourite game, chess. Often he would concoct cunning plans and plots, that many would call pranks, in his spare time. Frigga, the boys' mother, even taught Loki to wield magic. She tried to teach Thor, but he wasn't taken with the idea. He would rather smash things with his fists than using these so called 'tricks.'

Odin had told them another thing. Something that Loki had carried with him in the back of his mind since the day he heard it.

“Both of you were born to be kings.”

Loki had always tried to please his father, but Odin never really seemed all too impressed with his dark-haired son. It was like everything he did was never quite good enough for the King. Like Loki wasn't good enough...

It certainly seemed that way upon the announcement of Thor's coronation.

How could it be Thor? He was so unbelievably full of himself! He was not fit to be King by a long shot! Loki knew he had to do something. He, at the very least, needed to delay such a heinous decision made by his father. But how to do it?

Oh...

Now there's an idea. It was so crazy it just might work, Loki thought to himself. He'd have to pull it off flawlessly for it to work. A little bit of mischief, a dash of fun, and a whole lot of treachery. This would be the biggest antic Loki will have committed yet. Was it going to be worth it?

He was sure of it.

Just as sure as he was that he would become King.

The day had finally arrived. Hundreds of fellow Asgardians filled the Great Hall, all adorned in their finest garments fit for this most special occasion.

It sickened Loki.

It sickened him, even more, seeing Thor foolishly parade himself to the throne.

Couldn't Father see how poor of a choice Thor was? It took everything within Loki to keep his composure standing alongside his mother, watching his life be ruined yet again by that bumbling buffoon. The plan should have taken into effect by now, but there was still no sign of a disturbance. Loki grew worried. Maybe his treachery would have been for nought.

It wasn't until Odin stiffened mid-speech and snarled the most beautiful words Loki had heard since this wretched coronation began: “Frost Giants.”

The guests were ushered out of the Great Hall, out of the palace entirely with not so much as an explanation. Behind Loki's innocently concerned facade lurked the gleefully proud truth. Loki managed to force the correlation between the immaturity and childishness of his brother and that of Loki's own current actions deep down inside him. To a part of him that he never visits.

Thor was raging in the dining wing of the palace later that evening. Was it really necessary to flip the table? To Thor, the answer was probably a yes.

Loki carefully slithered out from behind a pillar and sat down next to his fuming brother. He couldn't help but throw some fuel on the fire, so to speak. After all, it was in his nature.

“If it's any consolation, I think you're right,” Loki spoke softly. “About the Frost Giants, about Laufey. About everything. If they found a way to penetrate Asgard's defences once, who's to say they won't try again?” And then to cater to Thor's warlike tendencies. “Next time, with an army?”

“Exactly!” Thor agreed, sounding thankful his brother was on his side. Or so he thought. Loki knew Thor would want to retaliate against the Frost Giants. So he created the opening for such an opportunity.

“There's nothing you can do without defying Father.” Loki should have heeded his own words. Thor gave him a look. One the younger brother knew all too well. “No no no no no, I know that look.”

Thor explained how he wanted to ensure the safety of their borders but Loki told him it was madness. Sif and The Warriors Three weren't too sure about Thor's plan at first, but if there's one thing Thor inherited from his Father, it's how to give an influential speech.

Before anyone knew it, Thor, Loki, Sif, Fandral, Hogun, and Volstagg were at Heimdall's doorstep, the gateway to other worlds. To Jotunheim in this particular case. Loki wondered if maybe he had taken things a bit too far this time, but there was no turning back now.

Heimdall reluctantly obeyed Thor in aiding them to journey to the home of the Jotun race but did not promise to keep the Bifrost open. The Gatekeeper explained that that would unleash the full power of the Bifrost, destroying Jotunheim and them upon it.

Bright lights surrounded the group as they flew through their world to the next, a world of abominable freezing temperatures and glacial canyons. At the moment of arrival, the atmosphere was dead quiet and suspiciously deserted. Thor and his friends gave involuntary shivers at the sharp winds. Loki expected his body to mimic the others', to feel the coldness seep into him as well.

But the feeling never came.

Only anxiousness about forthcoming face to face with the people he conspired with.

Naturally, his anxiousness grew tenfold when the Asgardians finally came across Laufey, King of the Frost Giants, and his people. They seemed rather dumbfounded at the idiocy of the group showing up. Puny Gods, they must have thought.

Thor demands how Laufey's people found their way into Asgard. Loki's stomach dropped at the question and received a knowing glance and demented smirk from the Jotun King.

“The House of Odin is full of traitors,” Laufey told him. Thor did not take this accusation well and growled back that this was a lie.

“Your father is a murderer and a thief,” Laufey retaliated. He continued to taunt Thor. Loki knew how fun that was to do, but for the situation's sake, he tried to talk Thor down from attacking anyone. He tells his blond-headed brother to look where they were and recognize that they were outnumbered. Loki couldn't risk anything more or his prank would blow up in his face. Laufey might spoil it all.

“Know your place, Brother.” That's rich coming from Thor...

Laufey, surprising to everyone, gave them all a chance to leave.

“We will accept your most gracious offer,” Loki told his co-conspirator. He was thankful Laufey was letting them go and keeping their little secret of betrayal between them. “Come on, Brother.”

All it took was one comment from a lone Frost Giant telling Thor to run back home like a “little Princess.” Loki cursed.

That was when the battle broke out.

Each warrior had their trusty weapons at their side ready to wield against the Frost Giants. Thor had Mjolnir, Hogun and his mace, Sif her staff, Fandral with the sword, and Volstagg his axe. Everyone had an item in hand but Loki. He had his magic and illusions. Which worked just as well as any weapon, actually. Loki was able to fake out his opponent with magical duplicates of himself.

A deafening shout from Volstagg echoed across the icy canyon, “Don't let them touch you!”

What could that mean?

Loki however, didn't hear the warning in time and found out exactly what Volstagg meant. A Frost Giant grabbed him tightly by the wrist, shattering Loki's armour. He took a closer look at the hold his enemy had on him and was taken aback upon seeing that his arm and hand had turned blue.

The same blue as the Frost Giants' skin.

Loki's eyes widened with shock. It didn't hurt. It wasn't cold. Complete and utter disbelief ate at him. The Jotun shot him a curious look with his blood red eyes, also confused at what had just passed. Loki took this moment of weakness and stabbed him with his hidden dagger. The Jotun dropped to the ground.

Loki examined his arm and noticed his skin had returned to its normal alabaster tone. The two main feelings that flooded him were confusion, followed by fear.

“We must go!” Loki shouted to his brother, but Thor paid no attention and still fought like a madman. He sure paid attention when Laufey released the beast on them.

They all ran for their lives. The beast gained. Soon it had them cornered at the edge of a cliff. Most of the Asgardians thought this was the end, staring into its hideous face.

But leave it to Thor to rip a hole through the beast. Literally. Right through its throat.

Everyone watched it as it fell over the cliff to its death.

Even the Jotuns, who had crept up on the trespassers. There was no way out of this, surely.

But a loud whinny and flash of rainbow light erupted in front of both parties. Loki's face drained of all colour.

Odin had arrived to save them.

And then slaughter them once they returned home, probably, Loki thought.

The kings of Asgard and Jotunheim confronted each other for the first time in many long years. Odin claimed Thor's actions this night as boyish and that Laufey should treat them as such.

Maybe my plan has worked, after all, thought Loki. He must finally see how unfit Thor is for the throne now. Before any more damage was done, Odin whisked the group home with the help of Heimdall.

The Allfather scolded his eldest son. Had he realized what he'd done by going to Jotunheim? He had created a war and put the lives of his friends and his people in danger all due to his reckless actions. Loki tried to speak up on Thor's behalf only to have Odin snap back at him.

“Why did you not stop him?”

Oh no. Now the spotlight was on Loki.

“You could not possibly think I could do such a thing? Stop Thor? You know what happens when he get these ideas in his head!”

“And who do you think gives him these ideas?!” Odin yells.

He knew.

How did he know?

“I am the Allfather, Loki. I know this was your plan. I know this was YOUR DOING!”

Loki shook his head in denial. He hadn't meant for it all to come to... this.

“Father, I-”

“You have started this war. You are a cruel, reckless monster and I was a fool for taking you in that night!”

The room filled with a deafening silence.

“Wh-what?” Loki's voice grew quiet. He tries to understand what was just said but makes no sense of it. What could Odin possibly mean by that?

“I was going to tell you someday but clearly the time is now,” Odin said gruffly. “You are not our biological son, Loki.”

Loki felt as if he was falling. Like the ground had opened up beneath him and swallowed him whole. He wished it really would.

“No. It can't be true.” Though when the words left his mouth, he felt deep down that it was.

“It is,” the King said. His words were clipped. “Years ago, in the aftermath of the battle, I went into the temple and I found a baby. Small for a Giant's offspring. Abandoned. Suffering. Left to die...”

No. No. No...

“I'm a Jotun? A Frost Giant?” Loki said with disgust. The strange occurrence with his skin in battle started to make horrible sense.

“Not just any Frost Giant. Laufey's son.”

“Laufey?” Loki spat out the name.

“Yes.” Wheels were turning at full speed inside his head, trying to grasp at all this dreadful information.

“Why?” Loki asked. “You were deep in Jotun blood. Why would you take me? What was the purpose?”

When Odin doesn't speak, Loki cries out in anger.

“TELL ME!”

“I thought we could unite our kingdoms one day. Bring about an alliance, bring about a permanent peace. Through you. But those plans no longer matter.” Every word out of the King's mouth tore Loki's heart into a thousand pieces. It hurt. It hurt so much.

“So I am no more than another stolen relic? Locked up here until you have use of me? You could have told me what I was from the beginning. Why didn't you?!”

“You were my son. I only wanted to protect you from the truth.”

You were my son.

“What because I-I-I'm the monster parents tell their children about at night? Well, it all makes sense now!” His anger was barreling frighteningly quick. “Why you favoured Thor all these years because no matter how much you claimed to ‘love’ me, you could have had a Frost Giant sitting on the throne of Asgard!”

“And you never will!” Odin's voice rang throughout the room.

Oh, just you wait, he thought viciously.

“You have disgraced this kingdom, this family, and yourself. Loki Laufeyson, you have betrayed the express command of your King. Through your foolishness and stupidity, you have opened these peaceful realms and innocent lives to the horror and desolation of war!”

Odin jabbed Heimdall's staff into place and activated the Bifrost.

“You are unworthy of these realms!” Odin ripped off Loki's silken green cape.

“You are unworthy of the loved ones you have betrayed.” As Odin yanked the hidden dagger from his sheath, Frigga flashed before Loki's mind. He was sure that hurt most of all.

“You are unworthy! I, Odin, Allfather, cast you out!” Odin summoned Mjolnir from Thor and with great force, struck Loki into the beyond of the Bifrost. He had never been hit by such a powerful physical energy. He was knocked out completely.

At one point though, for a few short seconds, Loki was able to open his eyes. And for those few glorious seconds, he saw a face. A gentle face. A worried face with twinkling eyes full of beauty and concern and kindness. Loki fell back into unconsciousness.

And he dreamed of those eyes...

Part 5

[itsybitsylemonsqueezy]

Okay, here it is, my thoughts on Gotham 3x19. Or more accurately termed, my complaints. I want to warn you right now, it’s just a shitmess of complaining, so if that’s not what you want to read, then PLEASE don’t, you’re under no obligation to do so. But I really needed to say these things for my own peace of mind, so here it is:

You remember how 3x18 ended right? 

Here's my question: why didn't they go with that? Why did they have to redo it? Why did they COMPLETELY retcon tone? Why?

Because, I think we can all agree, what we had at the end of 3x18 does NOT match 3x19. So let’s start with that. And I have some theories about why it changed so dramatically, but first let me clarify what changed: the lighting, the framing, the music, the entire TONE of their confrontation is in a new genre. We VERY OBVIOUSLY change perspective and I’m not sure why, I’m not sure WHOSE perspective we had the first time or whose we have now, I'm not sure we’re MEANT to associate the change with any particular perspective, save that a change WAS made. The only things that didn’t change were the lines themselves and the blocking. Everything else was completely new.

And, in my opinion, 3x19 lost all of the tension that made 3x18 what it was. And perhaps that WAS because we were seeing it again, but the changes also very deliberately took the tension out, they deliberately softened the scene. And, in my opinion, that was a mistake. Because I think their confrontation deserved and warranted the tension we had at the end of 3x18. I think the narrative was built for that, was deliberately developed for an exciting climax and, more even than that, I think that end shot is one of the few perfect scenes in all of film. And I think they, the creators (writers, producers, directors, etc), not Robin and Cory I need to stress, butchered it for reasons I will get to later. And I’m upset about it.

Because their choice, from the get-go, to mute their confrontation changed the entire tenor and dynamic of this episode. And, again, I think it was changed for the worse. But even if we hadn’t seen that bit in 3x18, even if we walked into 3x19 without this pre-existing expectation, I still think 3x19 falls short.

Because isn’t it ODD Ed spends no time freaking out?

Ed accepts Oswald is alive and slips RIGHT BACK into a functioning relationship, or establishing a new one with new rules at minimum, like he's slipping on a fucking glove. And I DO have some justification for that but it's FUCKING WEAK and the thing is, the EPISODE doesn't support it. The episode does NONE of the emotional, intellectual work it was SUPPOSED to. The only reason I can come up with justification is I'm a fucking fan who spends all my time in Ed's brain working out how he thinks. The episode gives JACK SHIT about why Ed reacts this way and I'm FUCKING FURIOUS.

(Spoilers, this is the less edited part where I‘m just really mad about everything and swear a lot.)

So, in all fairness to the writers, you CAN justify Ed’s reaction by saying Ed straight up refuses to react/can't react. You CAN justify it by saying his game-playing is a coping mechanism (which it has been established to be, re: 3x15) so instead of having an emotional reaction to Oswald right there, Ed rejects it and instead defaults to an established schema in which he CAN cope and Oswald, for whatever reason, goes with it. So, to be as even-handed with my criticism as I can be, I can reverse engineer this to a point where it's plausible. But again I had to do that, the episode DOES NOT do that for you.

And, personally, I'm not sure it's really justified in Ed's PATENTLY SHITTY coping mechanisms that he'd be able to save himself this quickly. He’s never been able to cope effectively before, and we might chalk this up to progress, but... it seems unlikely to me personally. And, again, the episode does not justify this assumption, it provides no evidence that Ed is coping at all because we never see him react in the first place, and the previous episodes SURE AS SHIT don’t make the argument that Ed has developed a single dependable coping mechanism. So this progress would be fairly out of the blue. In 3x15, we see very clearly why Ed is playing a game, we understand it, we get a deep inside look at what he’s doing and why. And, sure, they didn’t have time to do that this episode and, sure, the title of the show is Gotham, not Nygmobblepot, all of that is true. But I’m getting ahead of myself. I will attempt to justify why the writers did what they did later, but first I need to explain why I'm upset with it.

So let’s recall, shall we, what Ed’s psychology was like leading UP TO this confrontation. Because it seems VERY CLEAR to me that the writers totally fucking forgot OR deliberately rewrote Ed on the fly and I’m not sure which is worse.

3x14: Ed murders Oswald, or, more importantly, he thinks he does, he believes it, with heartfelt conviction. It’s Kind Of A Big Deal.

3x15: Ed copes with having murdered Oswald, culminating in saying goodbye and embracing his new identity as The Riddler. Also Kind Of A Big Deal

3x16: We take a much needed break from Ed shenanigans. He, apparently, moves out of Oswald’s mansion at long last and begins work on an evil hideout of his own.

3x17: Ed takes his first stab at independent villainhood. His single goal is to find out who the Court of Owls are which... is neither really a success nor a failure. He DOES end up with the Court, but not through his own machinations and neither does he really get any information about them and in the end has to escape from them. I’m calling this a net failure.

3x18: He gets less than 24 hours to stew about his stymied ambition and first setback as a new villain before WHOOPS, OSWALD’S BACK, I GUESS INDEPENDENCE IS CANCELLED.

And, let me remind us, ED HIMSELF says his new identity is formed DIRECTLY OUT OF OSWALD’S DEATH. AND OSWALD. IS ALIVE.

And Ed. is. fine???

Forgive me if I feel this doesn’t fucking line up at all.

Forgive me if I think the BLIND FURY coming from Ed at the end of 3x18 was APPROPRIATE AND JUSTIFIED. Forgive me if THAT’S the version I wanted to see and I don’t understand AT ALL why they went with this completely unjustified, no-stakes, softened mess.

And when you think about it, all lined up like that, the retcon in 3x19 falls apart. You just have to wonder what the fuck they thought they were doing. Because it makes no fucking sense.

So, I'm sorry, I'm SORRY, but... THAT is my problem. THAT. Right there. The fact that they gave NO credit or justification to Ed's emotions. And I am BESIDE myself about it.

And it ruined the entire goddamn episode for me. Because you can't have... jesus fucking christ *headdesk* Nothing we just saw would have been happening if they gave a SECOND'S emotional honesty to Ed, but they didn't. And it's really upsetting because I LOVE the shenanigans of 3x19, I WANT to enjoy them, I just wish I could... :/ they just... they, the creators, fucked up for me, they fucked this up and I can't :ccc You lost emotional veracity and that's EVERYTHING to me. I'd rather have a boring shitty episode that was HONEST than this :ccc Because this BREAKS continuity for me :ccc breaks suspension of disbelief.

But I do have a feeling i know why it changed, why they went with this version. The unfortunate thing is they wrote and SHOT a goddamn perfect scene. But the suspense, the expectation, was so high, they got scared and they backed down. Instead of deciding to push the thematic tensions of darkness and angst, they rewrote it to something light that they could get away with, so they COULD write off this HEAVY, heavy scene as what we saw. Because the show IS for teens and it IS called Gotham, not Nygmobblepot, and I want to admit that. I want to admit that the creators have a different perspective and different priorities than I do and maybe it’s not fair to hold them to this. Maybe I am just being harsh, and bitter, and salty. And it’s true, I don’t run this show, they have to run it, and I believe they’re making the best decisions they can. I don’t want to sound like I hate them even though I disagree strongly with what they’ve done. They’ve got bigger things to worry about than this and... you know, maybe I shouldn’t hold it against them. That’s fair.

But at the same time... what they did was a retcon. What they did was not justified by the build up and it was a betrayal to Ed’s characterization. And, no matter how anyone else feels about that, it hurt me personally. And I’m entitled to that hurt. No one else has to agree or appreciate or even listen to me, but I get to feel how I feel. Just to clarify, this is my feeling, it’s not something anyone else has to agree with or listen to, you have every right to believe I’m full of it.

So I understand they might have had VERY justified reasons for this tonal shift and not dedicating the emotional time and energy they SHOULD have to this. I really want to give them credit and admit that my priorities are not theirs. And yet, at the same time, they had ALREADY dedicated two major episodes, back to back, EXCLUSIVELY to Ed’s emotional development about this. So why stop here, why not bring it home? It seems unfair to me and either stupid or cowardly. At the very best, that's realizing they set themselves up for failure and HASTILY backtracking and having to foil everyone's expectations. At worst, it was shitty showrunning where no one was paying attention. But that’s me being harsh.

Now, after having said ALLLL of that, they can still recover in 3x20. Again, I don’t want to sound like I’ve completely lost faith in the show. It is STILL possible that the writers planned this all along, even if I don’t like the way they’re doing this. (I think it’s a lot more likely they panicked last minute, but that’s neither here nor there.) So, here’s one theory about how 3x20 might go:

The only way (that I could find, you may find a different justification yourself) to justify Ed not losing his goddamn shit about Oswald being alive would be if he somehow doubted/wanted Oswald to be alive. Now, the evidence DOES NOT credit this, as it makes his whole goodbye speech moot (ANOTHER reason I am VERY PISSED OFF, but that is secondary from my theory.)

Let us assume that Ed harbored some kind of hope that Oswald was alive OR, alternatively, feared he really COULDN'T do this on his own. Either way, that means, when Ed sees Oswald, he experiences relief, thus justifying the entire episode. Now... this doesn't 100% fix it as the episode STILL fails to do any emotional credit by them. (Side note, which I might detail later, a LOT of really profound, heavy shit is said and it COMPLETELY SLIDES BY WITHOUT REACTION. Like, the shit IS said but NO ONE DOES ANYTHING ABOUT IT AND FUCKING FUCK ALL OF YOU WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK). BUT, it at least allows Ed to be happy to see Oswald again and it justifies his trust and eager willingness to work with Oswald again.

And, here's the thing, I am FAIRLY sure this theory WILL be supported in 3x20. If I'm right, Ed will suddenly become Very Stable. He'll suddenly be making sense and functioning again. This is because of that RATHER IMPORTANT THING HE SAID, "I'm the Riddler and I became him when I killed you" MEANING he killed part of himself in killing Oswald MEANING he's whole again now that Oswald's back MEANING he's reforming around Oswald and will suddenly be Very Stable. Now, again, that line SHOULD have been WAY MORE IMPORTANT at the time, but... the creators did what they did and we have to live with it and do the emotional work ourselves if we are so inclined.

Now... on the one hand, that I can accept. It was always a possibility that Ed WOULD never be able to function independently and would just have to stay latched to Oswald forever. But... what i wanted, and what Ed DESERVES, is the chance to make that decision for himself. Ed has not truly experienced independence yet, he has not had the chance to fail OR succeed at striking out on his own, so he DOESN'T ACTUALLY KNOW. Which prevents him from self-actualizing. Instead of letting him figure it out and making a conscious choice, thus enabling his character development, no, we gave him back a crutch and refused to let him develop. Which means, eventually, we'll have to do ALL OF THIS AGAIN the next time Ed craves independence. And like... fine, if he eventually decides he can't function without Oswald FINE, I accept that, but LET him decide! Just... PLEASE, GOD. Let him make a SINGLE CONSCIOUS DECISION. PLEASE.

And finally, in total fairness, it is a... remote possibility, but still a possibility, that Ed will recognize he feels better now that Oswald's back, but given it's Ed, Master of Repression, WHAT'S THE LIKELIHOOD OF THAT? Still... in fairness, I will admit that it’s an option, however unlikely.

Now I’m just... really sad. I’m really sorry to complain this much, especially about an ostensibly really nice episode that featured some great things. The premise just... didn’t feel justified to me and it bothered me. So... there, I'm done now, I truly hope I have not affected anyone negatively.

[selkiewife]

I know i’m late on this but I wanted to talk about The Dragon Demands videos based on the Game of Thrones Season 8 blue ray commentary and the original archived scripts for Game of Thrones, Season 8. 

Basically, YouTuber, The Dragon Demands went to the Writer’s Guild Library where he was able to see the archived scripts of Season 8 of Game of Thrones. Both the archive scripts and commentary on the blue ray confirms that most of the destruction in King’s Landing was originally supposed to be caused by the caches of wild fire left by Aerys being accidentally set off by Drogon and not because Daenerys herself “went mad.” The script says that civilians being used as human shields are caught in the crossfire as Daenerys is targeting Lannister soldiers in a strategical maneuver right before she heads to the Red Keep to enact revenge on Cersei. However, Daenerys is never described as specifically targeting innocent civilians needlessly. 

My thoughts under the cut:

I have to say, that this makes me feel slightly better in a strange way. I mean, it doesn’t erase the bad writing, the ridiculous way the war against the white walkers ended, the misogyny, the inconsistency, etc etc ETC... but this crucial plot point was the one I just couldn’t let go of because it was just baffling to me. With other controversial plot points, I would disagree with them, but I could at least understand what they were going for and what the motivations of the characters were. But Daenerys turning on innocent civilians was truly baffling to me because it comes out of nowhere, is entirely out of character, her motivations are incredibly unclear, and was not set up at all. But with all the fandom discourse, I had really started to think that maybe I am lacking comprehension skills or something. But no, there is actually a reason it made no sense. The “madness” plot line was added later. Emilia Clarke was never given the opportunity to portray Daenerys as mentally unstable. Emilia was portraying grief and revenge on Cersei (as the original script and directors told her to do) in contrast to D&D’s final editing which was portraying the “mad queen.” No wonder it came across as completely false and bewildering- before we even get into the discussion of whether or not this is in character or not.

I think this is definitely more than just a theory that the script was changed pretty late in development because of all the evidence- it is confirmed by Emilia’s commentary, the Visual Effects team member’s commentary, and also the original concept art. But even if there wasn’t all that evidence, there is also the fact that the original ending makes so many other confusing things in Season 8 suddenly make SENSE. 

For example, when Jon confronts Daenerys in the throne room and he talks about the women and children that were burned, Daenerys responds with “She used their innocence as a weapon against me.” Which makes total sense for Daenerys to say if she thinks she is talking about civilians that were used as human shields that died in the crossfire. But it doesn’t make any sense if she carpet bombed the city- although it does make her seem delusional, which is probably why Dave and Dan kept those lines in- hoping it would make her appear “mad,” since Emilia was never actually given the opportunity to portray Daenerys as mentally unstable.

There is also the scene where Jon asks Tyrion, “Was it right?” to assassinate Daenerys and Tyrion responds, “Ask me again in ten years.” There is really no reason for them to have that dialogue if Daenerys really did target and massacre innocent civilians. That is the kind of dialogue they would have if they were discussing someone who had done something more morally ambiguous. 

Then there are the lines that are out of place in the final version but that would have made complete sense in the original wild fire version, such as Jon saying “now and always” as he stabs Daenerys. “Now and always” as any Theon fan will tell you, is a phrase that belongs to Theon and Robb and what they said to each other when Theon was pledging loyalty to Robb. Having Jon say this to Dany as he is killing Daenerys represents the ultimate betrayal but also calls back to Theon’s struggle and how difficult it is to chose between loyalties- between families. In this case, Jon is choosing the Starks over the Targaryens. Kit Harrington even says that this is motivation in an interview he gave with winteriscoming.net. But given the fact that in the final edit, Daenerys massacred innocent children and civilians on purpose, Kit’s motivation for Jon seems like a relic of an earlier script: 

Kit Harrington: “Jon essentially sees it as Daenerys or Sansa and Arya, and that makes his mind up for him. He choose blood over, well, his other blood. But he chooses the people he has grown up with, the people his roots are with, the North. That’s where his loyalties lie in the end. That’s when he puts the knife in.”

And Yara Greyjoy’s lines. She surprisingly remains completely loyal to Daenerys, despite the fact that she massacred the entire city for no reason:

Yara Greyjoy: I swore to follow Daenerys Targaryen. 

Sansa Stark: You swore to follow a tyrant. 

Yara Greyjoy: She freed us from a tyrant. Cersei is gone because of her, and Jon Snow put a knife in her heart. Let the Unsullied give him what he deserves. 

This kind of conversation only seems plausible if they are discussing Daenerys taking out Cersei after she had surrendered and killing human shields in the process, something I can see Yara completely defending- since she was always in favor of attacking King’s Landing as seen during her war counsel scenes in Season 7. 

There is also the Emilia Clarke quote in the behind the scenes video HBO put out after the episode where she explains that Dany was targeting Cersei herself:

Emilia Clarke: “It’s just... grief. It’s hurt. And she has this ability to make that hurt a little bit less just for a minute. And here she is, sitting on this ridge and there’s the emotion and there’s the feeling and the feeling is to fucking kill her.”

Note that she does not say “the feeling is to fucking massacre the city,” or “the feeling is to target innocent civilians.” She says “the feeling is to kill her” as in Cersei Lannister- who is responsible for the death of her dragon and Missandei- and who massacred countless innocents herself when she blew up the goddamn sept lol. 

Not to mention all of the set up lines between Cersei, Tyrion, and Varys about Cersei using “human shields” which never came to fruition in the final edit, now make complete sense:

Cersei: Keep the gates open. If she wants to take the castle she’ll have to murder thousands of innocents first.

Varys: Tens of thousands of innocents will die. That is why Cersei is bringing them into the Red Keep

And yet, lol, we never actually SEE Daenerys attacking the Red Keep. We never see innocent civilians inside the Red Keep. We only see civilians being massacred in the streets. 

I also remember people who had seen the post Season 8 Game of Thrones Live Concert saying that Ramin switched to footage of the other wildfire scenes in past Game of Thrones seasons during his Bells sequence, instead of showing the massacre of innocent civilians by dragon fire. I use to think he did that because Daenerys was his favorite character. But given what we now know about the original ending, he probably chose to show the wildfire scenes because that was what he had specifically written music for before it was changed- the destruction of Kings Landing by wildfire.

I really wish they had kept the original script the way it was. It still would have been an incredibly controversial ending. Daenerys still goes after soldiers and a Queen who is surrendering- and that action unintentionally leads to the destruction of the entire city. Jon Snow still assassinates his lover and betrays one part of his family for the other. But, it would have at least made logical sense. People would have gone back and forth over whether it was in character or whether it was a good ending. But it would have been something people would be able to actually debate on an intellectual level- the way we debate Daenerys crucifying the slavers (who themselves crucified children) or Jon Snow executing Olly... It is a very grey and tragic ending with a lot of moral questions. It still might have gone over like a lead balloon. But... the ending we have is so much worst because it’s nonsensical.

The only reason I can think that they changed it was to make Jon and Tyrion appear less morally grey for plotting Daenerys’ assassination. They probably knew that the ending would be very problematic and were trying to smooth that over by turning Daenerys into a super villain. Yet they did this too late in the process after already showing Daenerys to be heroic in fighting with the north and then having Emilia Clarke finish her filming still believing she was playing a complex and at times ruthless character but not “mad” or “evil.” And then, there is also the intensely problematic issue with them conflating mental illness with mass murdering super villain. Even if it had been clear throughout the entire season that Daenerys was losing her grip on reality and becoming more and more mentally unstable, it still would have been incredibly controversial and I am not entirely sure it would have made the men look any better anyway.

Even though it is tragic as fuck, at least with the original wildfire ending, all of the characters are incredibly complex and morally grey and you can understand the motivations for everything they do, even if you don’t agree with them. For example, if Daenerys attacks Cersei after she surrendered, it is wrong, but it is also completely understandable. And in my opinion, it’s even more understandable when you remember that Cersei cannot be trusted. She can’t be trusted to send her armies to the north- why should Daenerys trust her to surrender in good faith? This kind of ending would also have said something very powerful about unintended consequences. Even though Daenerys did not intend for so many people to die needlessly, they did because war is horrific. And that message becomes even more powerful if her motivations are understandable. But yeah, this kind of ending would have still been hated and debated but... at least the debates would have been more about the story itself rather than everyone trying (and failing) to make sense of what the fuck the story even is.