#and again everyone should read whatever tf they want to read

[tenrose]

Romantasy is the new bit-lit

[successfulgoddess333]

PLEASE READ!

Hey y’all so I’ve been thinking

Lately

If I should post again for y’all but the truth is

You don’t need me

You don’t need any one but yourself

So stop scrolling on tumblr on Reddit on quora on instagram on TikTok whatever the hell you use

You’re not going to make it

If you keep sitting here being lazy and depressed

Okay we get it

Your life sucks

You discovered the void state you discovered manifesting

And yet you’re still continuing to live in a nightmare instead of living in a dream

I’m not coming back I’ve tried to but I realize you don’t US

You don’t

You don’t need tumblr

Stop asking questions stop obsessing

Just lay tf down and meditate

It’s all it takes

Why are you planning???

Why are you stressing??

No DMs

No questions

No Gc’s

No comments asking

“How can I-“

No

Respectfully

Be quiet and realize who tf is in charge here

I’m not here to baby you I’m not here to sugar coat

Sugar coat for what??? Babes I ain’t sugar coating nothing but my damn donuts

Y’all gotta get out of this loop

You’re procrastinating

You’re being lazy

You are

You’re lazy

It’s ok admit it

You fucking like it here don’t you??

You loveeee having a shitty ass life

Because if you didn’t

YOU WOULD GET YOUR ASS OFF THAT BED COUCH ETC AND GO GET YOUR DREAM LIFE

I can’t be nice to people who know they’re power and aren’t using it

It’s like a billionaire being ridiculously cheap

“Oh I don’t want that that’s too much”

“Sir it’s $3”

And you’re a billionaire”

You’re gonna keep scrolling keep wishing you’d look like an ig model

News flash

Helloooo

You can look BETTER than Kylie fucking Jenner

Ok

She got surgery

You got POWER

Even SHE has this power

EVERYONE DOES!

Only a few are aware and that’s why you’re chosen

You’ve beat the fucking system of life

Seriously the insecurity

In this community

And idc if anyone thinks I’m being rude

This is what you need

You need to be yelled at

You need tough love

You need rudeness

I’m doing this outta love

Don’t like it don’t follow

But if you made it this far

Get up and get it

And stop complaining about a life you can change in one second

You can literally get in the void right now

And I hate when ppl say they got “kicked out”

Bitch who kicked out the mf void state? THATS YOU!!!!

You didn’t get kicked out

You just realized where you were and probably got scared or confused and accidentally shifted your awareness back here

Even when you get in the void

It won’t do anything

Unless YOU SAY YOU HAVE YOUR DESIRES

Because you can just stay there

And come out with the same life

The change happens when you

YOU

Say you’re affirmations

Don’t you get it

The void listens to you

If you say something you get it immediately

And who tf said you needed the void to manifest

Bby girl there’s a bagillion methods of manifestation

The void state works yes indeed

But it’s because of you

But don’t getting shocked when you get your desires you knew you were getting it

You can be excited yes

And don’t act like you need a method

Or a special subliminal

Those videos work if you allow them too

Quit giving power to a 10 minute video

These are TOOLS

Guides

They help you like a teacher

Don’t you graduate high school not only because you learned but you applied what you learned

Ok so learn from

These blogs these guides

But stop putting trust in subs

No hate to subliminals

Use them if you want

I use them

But don’t give them power

They are guides

And please

Use this as tough love reminder

I love my followers but please get yo ass up and go get it

[peripaltepsy]

BEWARE OF "body mod advices" - they can be dangerous and LETHAL.

(this post was about a deactivated blog but extends to any possible future blog like it)

edit3 since he deactivated: Red told me in the DMs that he WILL be more careful about all this risk stuff, I believe he is going to do better. Im sure he's a good person and he also was extremely civil in the DMs. Since he's not here to defend himself anymore I'll gladly take his side and say that despite this mess, all Red wanted to do was indeed reduce harm and potentially save lives. Good luck on all your endeavors, Red, I wish you a beautiful and successful career and that you have a great positive impact in the atypical dysphoria community, both on and offline. I don't know how my post truly impacted you, I'm so sorry if you're feeling bad. You acted the best way you possibly could.

Second, if Red comes back, DO NOT HARASS HIM, let him be himself and don't let his past hold them down.

Third, all my points still stand for their deactivated blog and any potential body mod tips blogs in the future. Please everyone, take care, stay safe.

Past edit: DONT HARASS any possible blogs like hers, just REPORT and spread awareness, (also don't make the same mistakes as me: TALK TO THEM FIRST)

Past edit: minors please interact with this post, forget my bio for this one

Past edit: editing editing the post since I talked to Red and he isn't bait. I definitely should have talked to them in DMs first. I sincerely apologize. So sorry Red! To those reading, don't make the same mistake as me, ok? Always talk to people privately first, I genuinely fucked up bad. This mistake of assuming others intentions, can traumatize them. If I were in Red's shoes I'd be traumatized. So yeah, I fucked up bad.

Their intentions are genuine but my point still stands that its extremely dangerous and can't qualify as harm-reduction / end edit note

alright, I'm not transid/radqueer but you guys need to REPORT AND WARN OTHERS of these accounts as soon as they appear. Do not entertain them, no matter how desperate you are to transition. You can become a victim of dangerous charlatanism.

LONG POST AHEAD, VERY IMPORTANT NEVERTHELESS

Archive to what i'm about to post

Red claimed to be "a non-professional surgeon, planning on getting better with practice." Bad move!

Red has told me he's pursuing a medical degree and won't actually do non-qualified surgery.

.

Red: "The blog is centered around an idea of "extreme" body mods that I would like to explore further, [...] things like breaking and re-mending bones, creating new joints, replacing skin, etc."

My point: the road to hell is paved with good intentions, and your blog was unsafe.

.

To any possible counterarguments: "But they (people following/asking advice) know the risks!" That's victim-blaming. Red gave himself the responsibility to give harm-reducing advice, but he didn't do a good job.

"But I know the risks!" You can't possibly know the risks because Red doesn't know either or "kinda knows" but has not properly informed his audience, it didnt give sources, oversimplified their advice and failed to provide accurate information about risk. Or gave plain misinformation.

Again I'm not transid, I can't possibly imagine what you're going through in order to try anything at all to feel better, including trying experimental surgery not legally available or not researched at all. However, please please please do not become a victim of medical deceit or whatever tf it's called. Even if the blog owner tries their best to be reliable.

They might sound confident, but they do not know what they are saying, what they're telling others to do.

.

Ask: "How would I make my skin gray without tattoos?" (DO NOT SHAME THIS USER BTW)

Red: "[...] I assume you want permanent grey. To do this, it's pretty simple, although it'll take a lot of time. Basically, what you want to do is to constantly be exposed to lots of silver. Any product with silver in it like specific lotions and skin creams. also fish, milk, mushrooms, and whole grains tend to have silver in them! So tldr, consume lots of silver!"

STOP!!! DONT FOLLOW THIS ADVICE!!! DONT OVER-EXPOSE YOURSELF TO SILVER!!! "Silver toxicity causes argyria. Silver toxicity occurs when too much silver is in your body." <- from a simple research on "too much silver in blood"

THE RESULT WILL BE ARGYRIA. EVEN IF YOU DO IT SLOWLY, YOU ARE BUILDING UP A HEAVY METAL IN YOUR BODY. THE GREY SKIN IS NOT PRETTY NOR WITHOUT GRUESOME SIDE SYMPTOMS.

Yall. Anything in excess will fuck up your body, including iron, vitamins, and silver.

To whoever asked Red, I don't know your mind, but I'm sure you'd love to live a happy life with grey skin! You'd love to have a body you're comfortable with and looks rad as hell! But you wouldn't be able to enjoy it if you're deeply sick with ARGYRIA, WHICH IS WHAT RED'S ADVICE WILL GIVE YOU!

.

Ask: "How do I get darker skin without going too dark? I’m pale and burn easily, I just want a color similar to Lin Manuel Miranda" (AGAIN DONT HARASS THIS USER)

Red: [...] "expose yourself to the sun more! As you do this, you'll get tan which will protect you from future burns and make your skin slightly darker, do this enough and you can engineer your skin to be as dark as you want!"

THATS MISINFORMATION! Yes you may tan to get darker (Lin's tone may or may not be achievable to you) but one: it's not permanent unless you're constantly going out; two: SKIN CANCER!!!! DONT OVER-EXPOSE YOURSELF TO THE SUN!!!! USE SUNSCREEN!!

TO ANYONE SEEKING A MUCH DARKER TONE: YOU CAN'T "GO AS DARK AS YOU WANT TO" BY TANNING. Just look at people who have lived their whole lives outdoors like farmers! White people can't tan to black! There's a limit to how tan you may get! Are you seriously gonna risk skin cancer for an impossible thing???

.

Red: "Self amputation is really dangerous! You should learn how to use a tourniquet, that way, you can stop the bleeding! [...]" WHERE ARE YOU GETTING YOUR SOURCES, RED?

If anyone reading this is seriously thinking of amputating themselves, and will not change their minds no matter what, please just have someone immediately drive you to the hospital. I do not support such operation and you can still die or get horribly sick even with your best precautions, but you better receive actual medical attention and stay alive rather than trying to heal it yourself. Because what you'll most likely get from following Red's advice is DEATH FROM BLOOD LOSS. Again, if you absolutely cannot get rid of this dysphoria with therapy, or manage it at least, or have a doctor do it for you, I still would NEVER suggest you do it yourself, but IF you end up doing that then at least please go straight to the hospital instead of trying to heal it yourself.

.

Red: "do not try and break your own bones to make modifications! [...] Get another person (Like myself) to help you with the bone breakage instead."

NO ONE KNOWS WTF THEY'RE DOING. YOUR FRIEND DOESN'T. RED DOESN'T (as they advertised in the post). NO ONE IS GOING TO GET MODIFICATIONS LIKE THIS. NO ONE IS GOING TO BE HAPPY. EVERYONE IS GOING TO BE EITHER IN PAIN, RISK OF HORRIBLE INJURIES OR TROUBLE WITH THE LAW. FUCKING AROUND = GUARANTEED BOTCHED OPERATION.

Also, now that Red has clarified she won't perform surgery until having an actual degree, you can't really go to her XD

.

Red: "Some advice for surgery [...] This one's important, make sure your patient is strapped down and properly sedated, if they move, even slightly, you risk hitting a vital artery or organ, if you do hit an artery, don't panic, this is why you learned how to use a tourniquet! if you hit a vital organ though, odds are you won't know how to fix that, so be extra careful with abdomen and face surgery!"

Thats still promoting medical malpractice, mutilating and potentially killing friends, dangerously downplaying surgery so much, this is not harm-reduction

.

Ask: "I want to be blind in one eye, but more-so in the sense of extreme but not total vision loss. I want to do something permanent in the future!" (AGAIN DONT HARASS THIS USER)

Red: Well, a simple fix to your problem is just get some calcium hydroxide in your eye and wash it out a few minutes later, this should lead to permanent, extreme (but not total) vision loss in that eye. Keep it in too long and it can cause total vision loss so be careful!

Ok so, it's great that you're trying to come up with alternative ways for users not to kill themselves by gouging their eyes out, but you've still failed to give them the full picture

From a quick search "calcium hydroxide in the eyes": Exposure to the skin can produce burns, painful irritation and necrosis, and exposure to the eyes may cause severe pain and vision loss that can be temporary or permanent. If calcium hydroxide is exposed to the skin, contaminated clothing should be removed, excess amounts of the chemical should be wiped off and the affected skin should be flushed repeatedly with water. Victims of calcium hydroxide exposure to the eyes should flush their eyes with water continuously for the first 15 minutes, but all cases of external exposure should receive immediate medical care. Inhaling calcium hydroxide through the nose or mouth can also cause immediate, painful and potentially life-threatening complications. Throat and nasal passages may become painful and swollen, and the swelling may restrict airways, making breathing difficult or impossible. If the calcium hydroxide particles are carried all the way to the lungs, this may further complicate breathing. Victims of this type of exposure should be taken immediately to a fresh air environment, and emergency services should be contacted right away. Administration of oxygen and emergency respiratory assistance may be required.

.

Red (answering an ask): "the question shouldn't be what DO people replace their skin with, it should be what CAN they, after all, just because it's never been practiced or very rarely practiced doesn't mean it's bad or impossible! Of course, my personal favorite skin substitutes are rubber and red velvet, I am also a big fan of stainless steel."

(Don't promote such an operation). THIS OPERATION IS BAD AND IMPOSSIBLE TO SUCCEED. SKIN CAN ONLY BE REPLACED WITH SKIN. SKIN IS A LIVING ORGAN. ANY OTHER SUBSTITUTE WILL CAUSE YOU TO LOSE BODY PARTS OR DIE.

YOU KNOW HOW PEOPLE WITH TRANSPLANTS NEED LIFE-LONG MEDICAL ATTENTION SO THEIR BODY DOESN'T REJECT IT? HOW TF WILL YOU DO THIS WITH FUCKING RED VELVET?

YOU WILL FUCK UP YOUR BODY'S IMMUNE SYSTEM A THOUSAND DIFFERENT WAYS.

ANYWAYS. CROSSTAGGING FOR REACH. PLEASE EVERYONE REBLOG. THIS IS SERIOUS SHIT.

[sturnioz]

broo, honestly im so sorry to heat about people being bitches, ur honestly so so sweet and i visit ur page everyday cause even just reading your reply to asks makes me chuckle and giggle, bro i even have notifs from you cause i dont wanna miss something honestly you should be so proud of ur platfrom on here and you should ignore the haters, honestly aswell people to copy your shit w no credit have no self respect. ANYWAYS i love your stuff so much and your so so so good at writing honestly whenever i try to read sm else fics they dont bang the same for me. Love u 🪱

i love you <3 ngl this whole situation has freaked me tf out cos the influx of hate abt me with fratboy!chris has been insane and i am panicking LMAO.

i just wanna quickly say that no, i do not own the frat au universe at all. you are absolutely allowed to do whatever you please with it. please create as many frat aus as your heart desires.

my issue, personally, was seeing writers that were doing frat aus and using my version of fratboy!chris — or writing something eerily similar that made me be like oh.. ok :( without credits.

i purposefully made fratboy!chris absolutely fucking mean and refusing to give shy!reader hardly any affection cos i thought that would be something different and new cos usually, in frat aus i've seen for different fandoms, they make fratboy!(character/person) mean to everyone but the reader and i just kinda wanted to switch that up and make something different. so when i come online and see something similar written by someone else, im just very :( aw man :|

i've said this multiple times before and i'll happily say it again. i LOVE knowing that i've inspired people to write. like thats fucking crazy ?? and so fucking cool ?? love that shit. and i'd be totally fucking ok if someone wrote something of mine and put "inspired by @/sturnioz" at the end without telling me beforehand cos its like a lil gift lmao. like i'd love that.

sorry that this reply is so long and jumbled, ive been very overstimulated with everything that has happened. please... with anything that i've written that anyone has felt inspired by, please credit me. thats all i ask.

[cloveroctobers]

DECEMBER PROMPTS 🧊 — 3. MICHAEL “MIKEY” BERZATTO

A/N: I want to attempt to make this a bit lighter but with the way the bear is set up? Happiness is a process. 🥂 Also this takes place BEFORE 7 fishes? Maybe a year or two prior, so thats probably six or seven years ago from now? The timeline isn’t overly important with this show so whatever your brain feels is cool with me! Also decided to do this in headcanon/note form this time around because things are definitely about to get hectic for me. Merry Christmas Eve or Happy Holidays to you all! 🫶🏽 hope its filled with nothing but greatness + all things that are lovely and not chaos.

PROMPTS ARE FROM HERE + I’m using: SCENARIO — 4.) Decorating the tree + DIALOGUE — 2.) “You know what they say, don’t eat yellow snow.”

<- read my previous December anthology prompt here.

⋆⁺₊❅⋆ ⁺₊❆⋆𐙚 ⋆⁺₊❅⋆ ⁺₊❆⋆𐙚 ⋆⁺₊❅⋆ ⁺₊❆⋆𐙚 ⋆⁺₊❅⋆ ⁺₊❆⋆𐙚 ⋆⁺₊

Michael Berzatto always loved cold weather and sure his birthday happened to always fall on a brutal cold day… he always put more effort into everyone else’s.

It’s something he’s always done and maybe it had to do with his childhood where most birthdays his own parents forgot about it, treating it as any other day because that’s simply how they viewed their own and wouldn’t even get him a card at least.

He grew up fast and pushed those terrible feelings as far down as they could go and focused on caring for everyone else.

Lucky for him, he had his younger siblings that always managed to put a smile on his face, showing him that they wouldn’t ever forget

and a shit eating grin would also appear thanks to his best friend Richie who always showed up with packs of beer and encouragement to head out to a strip joint but somehow Tiffany always figured out that plan!

a gallon of warmth poured into his chest when you would call him at midnight or the break of dawn, wanting to be the first to send him well wishes for another year.

You were always something special to Michael.

Which is why on the morning of November 15th, he showed up to your place, just to tell you later that you were going tree hunting while he went down to Chicagoland to get the rest of his hours in.

He heard how bummed out you were about your boyfriend not being in town (yet again) to go get a tree for the place you moved into back in July.

Michael didn’t particularly hate the guy but he also felt like he didnt care enough as much as he should with someone like you.

He was always elsewhere and Michael was just praying that he didn’t ask you to marry him and call it selfish but he didn’t see a glimmer in your eyes when you looked at the guy.

Michael felt like you two were just dating out of convenience—until you both found better, which YOU would but you didn’t seem to see that.

Which of course sparked arguments and the guy walked in on that argument, demanding to know what was going on and you didn’t want to escalate the situation so you sent a warning glance for Michael not to take it there.

He never listened.

A ban from the house was laughable to Michael because who tf did this guy think he was to tell him to stay away from his best friend’s house? He maybe “the man,” of the house but he wasn’t man enough to love you. You have to show you care in a relationship and put in the work and this guy wasn’t it. You were an after thought and that pissed Michael off.

and he didn’t give a shit if the guy was 6’6 and built like a linebacker, it was fair game in mike’s eyes! Michael would say what he felt and he was super protective over you—which you appreciated but not in that moment.

Before hands could ever go flying and out of the respect he has for you, he said his peace and left the home—since thats what you wanted…with the both of you not speaking for a week—which was painful.

And also painful to Richie’s ears because Mikey wouldn’t shut up about it!

You as a topic? Was never on the low.

“Are you finally gonna admit to the audience that you’re sweet on them, Mikey Boy!?” The amusement was clear in Richie’s piercing blues and Michael was tempted to smack it right off.

“Shut your mouth and get back to work, ya bastard!”

Michael knew the guy talked shit about him behind his back but regardless Michael was in your life WAAAY before this guy was even a factor! He wasn’t going anywhere,, unless you told him to but he hoped that never happened.

Your boyfriend didn’t like how you kept Michael around but he knew how to put on a mask too, being a FBI agent and all that, which means he was hardly around anyway so…that gave Michael more time with you in the end, which definitely made your boyfriend more irritated when he bothered to check in from work!

Michael found it funny that your boyfriend thought he was doing something by flying back to Indiana with you to spend (the controversial holiday) thanksgiving with your dad, step-mother, and half-siblings just to disappear again into his work as soon as the both of you returned to chicago.

While he was off on a case, Michael was there taking on the failed promises, which included: tree shopping.

Having a hybrid schedule, working as a publisher and just starting a meeting with a client, you were caught off guard the morning Michael greeted you on your front steps on HIS birthday.

He was all grins and barely in the appropriate wear for the approaching winter but fr! a hoe never gets cold you know? “You asked what i feel like doing for my birthday, right sweetheart? Spending it with you doll face and gettin’ us a tree, how’s that sound?”

You can can barely get any words out due to being on a call but a sweet smile that actually matched your eyes was enough confirmation—although it was on the tip of your tongue to argue, Michael took that to his advantage that you couldn’t in that moment.

Which didn’t mean you wouldn’t hammer him with texts a little later—but Michael sucked at texting so your attempts would probably go unseen anyway.

It was around six, you just got off thirty minutes ago and went to freshen up, ready to text Michael when he’s already at your door, keys in hand, shining teeth of a smile, your favorite sandwich in hand: a wrapped Porchetta, chicken parm, or a caprese sandwich (if you don’t eat meat) ready for you to eat on the go, since the farm closes at eight-thirty and the drives about thirty to forty-five minutes depending on the traffic…

Michael’s got terrible road rage and hates traffic but you’re not the best driver when the sky falls so you have no choice this evening but…he’s at ease with you on the passenger side.

He’s telling you entertaining stories as you eat and when you’re done, he’s asking for your review—although it’s your favorite sandwich so of course it’s going to be highly rated! but he just likes to hear you talk about the things you enjoy

he’s interested in your day since your work days are completely different and he’s not afraid to give his opinions if the author you’re working with sounds like an asshole.

Shopping with you can sometimes take forever but Michael doesn’t seem to mind. If you’re looking for the perfect tree, even if it’s ugly as hell, you’re gonna get the damn tree.

He’s used to artificial trees because the real one his family had after he just turned fifteen, his ma threw a lit cigarette at once, unbeknownst to the rest of the berzatto family, almost burning it to a crisp as she whipped around to yell at a seven year old Sugar about something, so his dad swore off “spending his hard earned money for Donna to ruin,” leaving Michael to stop looking forward to Christmas trees

Yet he was here on his birthday with you, happy to be here and help you find whatever you needed.

“What about that one?” You pointed at what would probably be the eighth one, if Michael thought to keep count.

He can’t help it—

He glances over his shoulders and scowls, “looks like uncle Lee, fucking balding in the middle.”

“Michael!”

“Wha? Am I wrong?! I’m just sayin, sweetheart…if you love that one, I’ll like it.” Michael raised his hands in surrender while you huffed, rolled your eyes and spun on your flats, diving in between a row of fully stocked trees.

Eventually you find a wide white spruce tree that the both you felt strongly about to bring back home

and the man is willing to throw his back out for you, getting it up your steep front steps, not allowing you to help him one bit, which is frustrating for you ofc.

Once positioned in your living room, just the way you want it, Michael wipes the back of his hand against his forehead dramatically.

“What would you like to drink?”

“I’m fine. Just gonna get some air, then when I get back we’ll discuss when you want to decorate it, yeah?”

You shake your head at Michael while he heads back to the front of the house through the screened in entrance before entering November’s air.

When he’s taking longer than expected, you go hunting for him just to flail around on some black ice after stepping down from the last step but manage to somewhat catch yourself on the railing.

Thankful for a bruise rather than a broken tailbone, you curse to yourself as the throbbing pain shoots down your femur.

And surely, Michael fucking berzatto appears from the shadows to assist you, “hey! whatcha doin’ down there?”

“I slipped on some stupid black ice…where were you?”

“You sure it wasn’t the yellow snow?”

“The what?” You exasperate as Michael guides you to your feet.

Michael points at the spot to the right of your front lawn and you scowl as he says, “you know what they say, don’t eat yellow snow!”

He laughs but stops short as you cut your eyes at him, “did you come out here to piss on my lawn when there’s two bathroom’s inside?”

Michael scoffs, “don’t go pointin’ fingers at me because you busted your ass. That ain’t my fault babe and you know I wouldn’t do that! I told you that was Richie’s drunk ass.”

Sighing you rub at your sore thigh, “I still owe him a kick in the ass for that.”

“Yeah you do,” Michael smirks as the both of you move to head back inside, “despite that, it was good house warming.”

You nod as you’re back inside the warmth of your new home and rest against the couch while Michael’s back to analyzing the tree you picked. “Hey, I’ve got you something.”

Michael shakes his head although a twitch of a grin is there,“I told you that you didn’t need to get me anything.”

“Shush,” you held up your hand at the man who raised his brows at you, “it’s nothing crazy but it’s in the fridge.”

He sighs at you but goes to your bright yellow kitchen nonetheless. Michael always gets caught up standing in your kitchen, just imagining all the meals he could get up to in here since it seems so bright and welcoming yet empty.

You were more of a breakfast person which is why he was always down to go to diners because of you, whereas he was more a lunch person because of his old man, hence why Chicagoland was a deli spot but Michael was okay with shifting his ways for you.

When he opens your fridge, he scans through it, easily picking up on what items belongs to your macho boyfriend and scoffs to himself before spotting a medium sized box tucked in the back of the fridge.

“Did you find it, Mikey?” You call out to your friend who latches onto the box, kneeing the fridge closed before making his way back into the living room.

He plops down on the couch next to you, eyeing you while you smile over at him patiently waiting.

“Here goes nothing,” Michael quietly says before pulling the top back to eye the mold of the zuccotto, “…you fucking didn’t.”

“I did,” you nod before explaining, “I thought about making one but I also didn’t want to disappoint you and then I remembered you’ve been wanting to try that bakery that’s here on my side of town, so I made a call and hope you like it.”

Michael swallows the lump in his throat at the gesture. He can’t remember the last time someone’s got him a cake but this wasn’t just some simple task. This was important because this means you listened.

You listened to how he told you that his nonna used to call him, “pumpkin bear,” because he was chunky and the shade of a Orange left in the sunlight fresh out the womb and that she made the best zuccotto he’s ever had and never tried anyone else’s since she’s passed.

Not even his ma could touch his nonna’s but he would never tell the woman that!

“The bakery’s a combined Italian-French place which they don’t really advertise until you’re actually inside but the little elderly lady who made it was the cutest thing and I thought you’d probably trust her.”

“I wanna kiss you on the mouth, you’re so good to me, you have no idea!” Michael pointed at you, voice thick with emotion.

This may seem small to any other but it really meant a lot and you could sense that as Michael gripped your hand to squeeze and press kisses to. “Happy birthday, Mikey.” You whisper.

Michael groans as he pinched the corners of his wet eyes for a moment, “I love you, you know?”

“I love you back,” you smile, “now can we try!?”

“Hell yeah we can but I get first bite this time.”

“I guess…it is your birthday after all.” You wink.

The taste test was so worth it, to the point Michael made it his mission to go meet the elderly woman down at her bakery during one of his breaks from the restaurant.

He shared kind words and got to know Giuseppina or “Josy,” up until the point they actually became friendly with Josy sending her husband Charles over to try what Chicagoland had to offer as well.

He had you to thank for that, reminding him of the good in his life, even what once was.

It isnt until the first week of December when Michael comes around again to decorate your tree.

“What the hell happened?” Michael quizzes you when he spots you with a brace taking up a huge portion of your thigh.

Guess that makes sense why you took so long to get the door.

You sigh, “hello to you too, Mike. Care to come in?”

“Yeah, yeah. Hi.” Michael greets, gripping your hip and pressing a kiss to your cheek before stepping into the too warm house.

You tell him you slipped again and that resulted into a bruised bone, which is less severe than a fracture and something you can heal at home with ice, and meds you wouldn’t be taking—so you’re just taking it easy.

“Why hasn’t inspector gadget put down any salt yet?” Michael commented as he shoved his thin jacket into the small closet tucked in the corner of the living room.

You have your oddly placed fireplace lit and boxes everywhere to dig through.

Sighing you plop back on the couch, “He’s busy but he brought up the decorations from the basement and I can do the salt myself.”

“Oh yeah? Why haven’t you?”

“…it’s cold.”

Michael fans his hands at you, “newsflash babe, we’re in Chicago not Kansas or wherever the hell he’s from and after we’re done tackling this tree, I’m gonna fix it.”

“Mikey—

“Did you hear what I said?”

The look he sent you with his dark eyes made you mold your lips together and cross your arms before you pushed off the couch to head over to a few of the boxes.

Michael does the honors of playing some Motown Christmas music on your tv to fill the tension, but he wouldn’t apologize for looking out for you.

The bare minimum when it comes to your boyfriend doesn’t impress him, not one bit and although you didn’t like and told Michael that you didn’t like him dragging your man, you couldn’t change Michael’s mind about him at all!

He was gonna hurt you and Michael was waiting for the asshole to just rip the band aid off or when you woke up and dumped him yourself.

Michael knew you had it in you and knew you deserved better than to just settle for what looks good on paper.

The smooth deep growl of Marvin Gaye singing, “I want to come home for Christmas,” (I heavily stand on the fact that Marvin Gaye is one of Michael’s favorite singers!) filled your home as the both of you went through the boxes, picking out your decor that brought all sorts of feelings to your frame.

You reminisced about what your life was and if your dad still had any of your old ornaments you made as a child, knowing your mother would have and what your life could be as you took your side of the tree, placing ornaments up as Michael hummed to the music.

The both of you worked in silence which wasn’t the usual although Michael was much louder than you, being quiet wasn’t the norm of your friendship.

And it wasn’t because of what Michael said to you, you weren’t that sensitive—it was you getting in your head about the holidays.

About your dad, step-mom, and siblings deciding not to speed Christmas with you like originally planned because they were going on a cruise and the possibility of your boyfriend traveling to freaking Europe around that time for work made you think about the upcoming loneliness

Yes you had another friend outside of Michael but it was just this odd feeling that you didn’t particularly want to define or gave much thought about until now…

“Hey, stop thinkin’ so hard and just be here with me, huh? Your favorite person on the planet.” Michael calls over the music, after catching you staring up at the length of the tree with one ornament still in your hand.

When your eyes meet his and that famous grin stretched over his features, you roll your eyes once you realized what he said, bringing you back into the spirit and moved around the living room in search of your stool.

Michael holds the stool until your comfortably on it before moving one hand to the small of your back to keep you stable.

When you glance back at him you state, “how do you know?”

“Know what?”

“You’re my favorite person when there’s a billion people in this place?”

“Ah, It’s all over your face! You know how they say heart on your sleeve? Well in your case, it’s on your face.” Michael comments as he holds your stare before you slowly get down to be face to face with him, “and don’t you worry, you’re mine too.” 🥹🥹🥹

You pat his jaw, “damn straight, baby. And don’t you forget it.”

“Never will,” Michael chuckles, “do I get to do the honors of putting up the star?”

You plop down on the couch, digging through what’s left in the box you were working on, “we don’t have a star.”

“…Run that by me again?” Michael turns to you.

You nod, “we wanted to do something…less traditional and it was between either a bow or what he went for…a stag.”

Michael eyes the topper and scowls as he reaches for the cream deer head, “im gonna keep my mouth shut on this one.”

“Thank you.”

“welcome.”

after awhile, Michael finds his way collapsed next to you eyeing the tree as the both of you sip at some cranberry punch you made the other day, eyeing some rosemary you had floating through it.

“It actually turned out pretty, no?” You ask, shoulder to shoulder with the bearded man.

Michael sips from the mason jar and savors the earthy tangy flavor, “best lookin’ tree I’ve ever seen!”

Resting your head against Michael’s shoulder you take in the scenery, feeling a little less alone as Michael’s lips peck your brow, reminding you that it’s best to hold onto what you have, rather than what you don’t. 

⋆⁺₊❅⋆ ⁺₊❆⋆𐙚 ⋆⁺₊❅⋆ ⁺₊❆⋆𐙚 ⋆⁺₊❅⋆ ⁺₊❆⋆𐙚 ⋆⁺₊❅⋆ ⁺₊❆⋆𐙚 ⋆⁺₊

read my final ~5 days of Xmas~ anthology prompt here.

[weirdestcornelius]

speaking of the preboot - i've never read it (yet), but i swear the website used to say that it was fine if people liked the preboot, just that kittycorn was personally uncomfortable with it. so when i got deeper into the fandom, i was confused why any mention of it was, like... forbidden. effect of the website not being updated (until now) and having to learn everything thru tumblr, i suppose.

I feel like it's perfectly fine that Kc doesn't want anything about the preboot being sent to kit- that's a reasonable boundary! You can set boundaries for what people can send to you! What's not a reasonable boundary is saying "you can't like the preboot. You can't like Cuddles. Don't talk about the preboot ever if you don't want to be burned at the stake"

I understand that the preboot makes Kc uncomfortable because of personal reasons; but people should still be allowed to like it. You can like controversial things. This is like the AP drama all over again when people were making callout posts on anyone who mentioned liking it or even daring to watch it. Hell I even saw someone in the Sparklecare tag saying "this person has the preboot and msi on their carrd that's such a red flag they're getting blocked" when it. Isn't?? 1: msi fucking rules. Not the band but the music and 2: you're free to block anyone you want but why tf do you think it's your place or duty to tell everyone in the Sparklefandom that they were blocked by you. You don't have to announce that to everyone else.

This fandom itself is REALLY obsessed with calling people out and cancelling them; it's the exact reason more than half the critic blogs are anonymous because people finding out you've done the ultimate sin of having a critic blog means that you're going to be shunned by the community who will probably send you death threats and start rumors about you. "You can't like this person's art bc they're bad!!!! You can't follow this person because they have a critic blog!!!"

I've literally seen someone attempt to call an artist out for something they did when they were a bad state of mind and attempted to create something controversial or whatever. So yeah ig Kc can trauma dump on a bunch of teenagers anytime she's upset but once another artist does anything else while also being upset that makes them a terrible person worthy of being shunned by everyone.

[stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale]

Funny how just 5 years later it's finally downing on me that Louis can get his tongue cut– that if he does, he'll *never* speak again. And how much he probably thinks about all the times everyone told him they wished he'd shut up, how annoying he was, how his jokes are stupid, his singing sucks, etcetera etcetera. Not just him, I wonder how guilty everyone feels about saying all that stuff.

For the others, does he resent them? And for him, are they glad? Is there a part in all of them that think 'finally'?

And it's taken me this long to try and assimilate just how absolutely horrifying the situation actually is. we don't know how they did it but we can imagine, and it's not pretty. It's mutilation- pure torture. I know it's a videogame or whatever but everytime I think of Louis in that cell, dried blood running down his mouth and all the way down his chest, I feel sick, genuinely sick.

I was reading one of your old fics yesterday and it got me thinking, that's why Im rambling here on your asks. But yeah, no-tongue Louis should be non existent and considered a crime or something

Oh yeah, it's rough. It's brutal. I hate it.

I've only let Louis get captured a handful of times in all the years I've played TFS because 1. I'm clouis trash and I need them to be happy together in the end no matter the cost, and 2. I cannot handle Louis in the cells, I can't. He's my favorite character in all of TWDG, I don't want that to happen to him especially when I know I have the power to prevent it.

To be honest, I tend to pretend that outcome just doesn't exist. If I ignore it, it can't hurt me haha.

Don't get me wrong, I like a dose of angst in my fiction. I like tragedies. I like symbolic downfalls. I like recovery arcs. There's a lot of potential with the route where Louis isn't saved and he loses his tongue...

...But Louis is in a special category of characters where I'm like, "No, fuck you, he gets to survive and be happy! He gets to be understood! He gets to be loved!"

I think a lot of feelings come from it being a consequence of choice, too, y'know? Louis losing his tongue is only one outcome, one you can prevent. It all depends on who you save at the end of ep2. It's on you, and you can try to be like "noooo shut up, it's actually Louis' fault he got his tongue cut out because he wouldn't shut up!" when it's your fault he got taken in the first place, like... that's the game. Your choices have consequences and you can deny or justify them all you want... but in the end, you did it. You started the butterfly effect with your decision.

I also think this is why people get heated in fandom debates because "how could you NOT save Louis knowing he gets his tongue cut out, you monster!?"

I dunno, how can you not save Violet knowing that you'll find her blind on the beach? You monster?

Both outcomes are bad, it's just up to the player on which they feel is "better" or "worse."

We justify it to ourselves. We defend our choices. But that makes the choice all the more powerful, no? I save Louis knowing what fate Violet will meet. I trust AJ knowing Tenn will die on the bridge. I save Louis every time because in a game series where most of my favorite characters don't get happy endings [because they're fucking dead], I'll do everything I can to make sure Louis gets one.

I can handle an outcome with blinded Violet. As bad as it sounds, I can stomach that. I can find some hope in a recovery arc for her, and I can deal with her and Clementine having a rockier relationship after everything that happened on the boat. I can take comfort in the idea that Violet's going to survive with the help of people who care about her.

I can live with Tenn's death. It sucks, it hurts, it's bullshit... but I can live with it.

I can't handle Louis losing his tongue. There is no stomaching that for me, y'know? He's such a crucial part of Clementine and AJ's story for me that I can't fathom her not saving him in that moment during the raid, just as I can't fathom Louis without his tongue.

[genericpuff]

What is your advice on handling criticism?

I saw your response to a critic on Lore Rekindled in the sub and it's very good and you could say, professional.

I have a big problem of people-pleasing, so if I get critcism (eventhough it's very polite), I get very sad at the fact there's fault with my work (I also suffer from perfectionism). It will drastically change how I see my work, and in the end I give it up 😭

fam i got teased tf out of for making it so wordy LOL

I totally get that struggle though, I know it probably doesn't seem it at times, but I do have the 'ole RSD (Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria) due to being ADHD/autistic, so I totally relate to the whole people pleasing thing. It's hard to feel like something you made isn't making everyone happy! But that's also ultimately not what it's for. You can't make everyone happy, and your art doesn't deserve to exist any less just because some people don't find it their cup of tea.

I've definitely had to like, disconnect my work from myself over the years to get better at taking criticism. Not to the point that I get apathetic, obviously I should be invested in whatever I'm working on, but enough that when people criticize my work, it's not necessarily an attack on my own self.

And if they are clearly just out to attack me, then I dismiss the criticism, it's of no value to me.

Unless it's something that's specifically a result of my own values or biases bleeding into the work, most of the time it's people literally just saying, "I like this work, but I feel like it wasn't as strong as it could have been here and here" and that has nothing to do with me as a person, I'm just still polishing my skills and those outside opinions help to target specifically what needs improving. I think we as artists pour a lot of ourselves into our work, especially when we're just starting out, so it can be hard not to take criticism as an attack or rejection of yourself, but we have to ultimately remember that we are not 100% of our work. Even with works like LO, while some of the criticism I give of it is indicative of Rachel's values and personal preferences as a person, a lot of it is also just about the work itself and how far it's fallen beyond what I assume Rachel intended from the beginning.

I've also learned to separate helpful from unhelpful criticism. I'll use Time Gate as an example because I've gotten way more input on that series than Rekindled (just because I've actually like, intentionally sought out criticism for it). A common criticism in the past was that there weren't enough backgrounds and the story's pacing wasn't concise. It sucked to hear at the time, especially the backgrounds one, because I'd heard that one time and time again... but it was literally because I wasn't doing anything to improve them. You know what stopped those criticisms? Drawing backgrounds more LOL And I still suck at backgrounds tbh but I feel like I've definitely improved compared to the first few volumes when I was just drawing characters on top of white constantly LOL

old and busted:

new hotness:

(i think there's like a 4-5 year difference between these two pages. and the backgrounds STILL aren't perfect in those newer volumes but they still feel more finished than the older panels did)

So that was helpful criticism! My art wasn't as strong as it could be in a few specific places that people were clearly able to pinpoint, so I did what I could to improve those places and I'm still working on it.

Unhelpful criticism has just been either personal attacks (not valuable) or statements that are basically asking the comic to not be what it is, criticizing things that are features, not bugs. Things like "well I think the story is too anime-like", "it's a lot to try and read", "why don't you draw eyelashes on the girl character", etc. which are criticisms of things that I know are intentional. The story's anime-like because that's the story I want to write. It's a lot to try and read because it's intended to be a longform series for people who like reading longform series (people like me!). I don't draw eyelashes on Uzuki because she would look terrible with them LMAO (we even made a joke about that later on):

(the hilarious part is that that comment was definitely made with the idea that all women should have that makeup look, meanwhile mitsuhiro's pulling off the look so much better and he knows it LMAO

And actually, the example you're referring to where I responded to crit in the ULO subreddit, is also an example of unhelpful criticism, though the person who posted it definitely didn't mean any harm by it, but the crit was literally "why aren't Persephone's boobs big enough" which I thought was pretty funny. She still has boobs! I just don't draw them popping out of her top like Rachel does LOL I also don't give her the exaggerated pinched waist or broken spine that Rachel often gives her because that's all just to, again, emphasize her boobs, and it's often unnecessary, especially in a comic that's being marketed as a feminist piece of work, yet is often drawn completely through the male gaze. So yeah, that was definitely crit that wasn't really beneficial because it was literally just about Persephone's cup size lol

I know it's easier said than done, but when you feel that sadness coming on in response to criticism, remember that that criticism exists to help you, not hinder you. Considering you've been getting polite criticism, that means the people giving it likely have your best interests in mind and want to see your work improve. The only way to do that is to learn how to critically analyze your own work, and the only way to do that is to surround yourself with works whose quality you want to achieve, and get outside opinions. And if that criticism isn't in good spirit, then toss it aside. If it's not going to help you, then it's not of any value to you. And yes, it will take practice, there are still times I find myself getting overwhelmed, but ultimately I can't control what anyone else says or does, only what I do. So I funnel that into my work and I always keep moving forward.

Be at peace with the process of learning and improving, because you never stop having to learn, there's always something new to improve, and that shouldn't be taken all doom and gloom "I'll never be perfect", that's literally just the process and beauty of being an artist, there's always something new to learn and that's something that should be exciting!

Think about whenever you give criticism or have personal critiques of other comics. I'm willing to bet most of the time, you have those opinions with good intentions, you're not trying to attack anyone. So why not give yourself the same grace?

...holy shit, I forgot Uzuki's lipstick in the bottom right panel- （；´д｀）ゞ

[eastereggie]

woohoo !! didnt except to respond to this whole essay (for more context, im talking about the document jay made about the drama in the kaeloo fandom lol) considering the fact that its basically just 222 pages of insults towards random (and especially her mental state -who tf do you think you are btw) and then pretending to be a saint by randomly saying "b-but ! i dont h-hate you guys 🥺". i knew that this whole "call-out post" would be bullshit, but thats just low. really, really low. i figured that you and your little friends (or should i refer to yall as a cult too ? since we're going in the extremes :)) were mostly just here to insult people and play the victims, but i didnt think it would be that bad. i wont say much about whats in the document because i think its randoms place to do so, since its basically just a long ass diss to her, but i still wanted to write a short response. am i allowed to though ? i mean, as a teen (even if im 18 in a few months, ive been called underage in your document so ill go with that) i can draw and read explicit content to explore my sexuality 🥺🥺 but i cant think for myself right ? :/ thats too bad. i cant agree with my friends because that would also mean that im a yes-man and that im being manipulated or wtv helps you sleep at night lol

this is just to respond to the little part that has been directly adressed to me: if my answers are short when the drama is brought up its because...i actually dont give that much of a fuck about the drama itself. do i think that you guys are gross for writing and drawing porn of children and animals ? yes, i do. would i care if you just stayed in your own server to share that shit to your "safe place" ? absolutely not. you do you. that is none of my problems if you dont bring it up in a space you share with KIDS. thats the whole problem with you. you posted your disgusting content in websites where kids will obviously find. as an adult, you must be really naive to think that they will just read your warning and think: oh yeah !! ill just move on to a new fic :3 !!

they are kids. this is a kid show. obviously, you are sharing your fandom with kids, and you have to be careful about that. that is your responsibility, whether you like it or not. you cannot except to be appreciated and respected when you write porn about kids, in a fandom full of kids. if you genuinely, truly believe that everyone should accept you for that...then man, theres nothing i can do for you. but you know, you could share your things since you cherish them so much in patreon or in your discord server if its too explicit, but ao3 ? wattpad ? the stm ? those are FILLED with young teens. i can't believe you're whining about having to respect rules to coexist in a fandom of a show about kids with kids...wild

again, this is my OPINION. i cannot force you to not like...well, the things that you like... but i can definitely call you out if you're sharing that to kids, even if its indirectly and that you put warnings or whatever. you need to be cautious about the members of the fandom. if you're unhappy about this, then leave the space that isnt for you.

as i said, this happens in many fandoms filled with minors: bunch of adults are weird. they're being called out for being weird. they cry about it and create a group. they call people who call them weird, weird. its really common. thats why the center of the drama isnt new or interesting to me. thats why i dont write essays whenever it is brought up in the main server, or when nsfw fics were posted there. creeps exist in EVERY FANDOMS. do i still think its good to call them out ? totally. but that explain why i:

1. didn't really say anything when jay were posting their fics. since they agreed with us on the topic of kaeloo fics with nsfw but still were posting them, i figured out that there was not point in arguing. i just ignored the weird parts of the stories or simply didnt read anything. i dont like conflicts, and had a lot going on (still do), so i didnt speak about it before. thats my bad though: even if jay wouldnt have cared because they have a different opinion than me about aging up characters apparently, i shouldve said something whenever i had the chance and not only when the subject of fics with porn was brought up, and i take full responsibility. but you must know that i do not support those type of works and never have said that i do. whenever we spoke about it, i made it very clear that it was gross and that i dont agree with it at all. to tlak about jay's fics again, i mostly was enthusiastic about all the parts where sex wasnt involved (about the ss of me talking about jays fic about pregnancy, i loved seeing how mr cat and kae would act as soon-to-be parents ! i think its cute !! do not mean that i agree with writing full scenes about how that child is made).

jay has great ideas, thats why i liked their work so much. i will never pretend that i hate EVERYTHING that they do. theyve wrote and drew great stuff, and just because i dont agree with them as a person doesnt mean that ill ignore that or the compliments that ive given to them. i admire a lot of their work and didnt lie about any nice things ive said to them. this is not all white or all black.

2. didnt write really big responses in the STM. this is a server about kaeloo. the drama isnt really brought up there, except when its important or at the start of it. with college, job, family issues and the start of adulthood soon, i do not have time to be on discord in the first place. either im here for a brief moment, or i can be active when everyone is asleep so they already said everything i had in mind and all i can say is "yes" to messages i agree with and "no" to messages i dont. you do not know me, and if you genuinely believe that this is all i think about what is happening, then you're just extremely stupid...obv i wont talk about everything i think in details in the STM, or rub it in your face.

the only reason why im involved is because you're harassing my friend and i do not want her to suffer alone. its as simple as that. i will always support my friends in public, and correct them in private if i think they did something wrong. is random perfect ? do i think that she does no wrong ? ofc not. i'll always tell her if i think that she's not doing something right, the only difference is that i'll tell her in private, not in a discord server. how do you except anyone to listen to you if you already don't respect them enough to confront them privately and privately only ?

i think ive spoken for my part and i will not speak for any other people involved in this ridiculous drama. i think this is all really a personal issue with random (and also khamil apparently) and i do not believe that it's my place to speak for any of them. as i think your friend said, which i think is true, im not relevant in this drama, and again im just really here to support random but also to express myself when i think that its a general matter.

so ill conclude this by saying that this is a really disappointing document. posting the insults that have been told to my friend, for no reasons other than hurting her, giving her a few really serious and uncalled for diagnosis, posting her vents from when she was a teen to make her feel vulnerable, posting hateful and ableist comments about her publicly, posting comments of people insulting vulnerable members who need to vent and more...that is so, so petty.

jay, i didnt know you for long and we weren't super close, but i still liked you a lot (/p ofc). i know you'd love to think that you're the victim and that we are all just shit talkers who hated you or whatever, but that is not the case. reading the messages of the drama after the drama has been shocking. reading your tumblr posts, reading what your friends said to my friend, reading your document, all of that have been so disappointing. not here to play violins and act dramatic btw, this is just a fact i wanted to share.

theres a lot of things unsaid, but i think that it's really random's place to speak about it, not me or anyone else. id like to respect her opinion in all of this, so ive only really spoken about what i generally think :] !! that being said, i wont post this seriously about whats going on anymore except if i need to, thats why im blocking a few people too. i want to enjoy my post without child porn being rubbed in my face. i really feel like all this other part of the fandom wants is attention, so i wont focus my whole tumblr on them lol, but calling them out is still important to me. i dont except them to change their ways since they look so sure of themselves, but anyone can dream, right ? sorry about how disorganised it is, or if my english is bad and also for my spelling mistakes lmao 🤸🤸 ty for reading this far though !! please check out random's response when it comes out !!

[decepti-thots]

I was in the tumblr tf fandom for a hot second a few years ago and i just wanted to ask, is it still really aggressive here? because back then there was a lot of shipping drama, there were a few callout posts going around (can't really remember about what) and just...a lot of bad stuff. I personally had someone tell me to kill myself because I liked one of the villains. guess I'm just wondering if, in your opinion, things have chilled out? Cuz I'd like to get back into it but I'm a little hesitant;;;

I'm going to try and give the fullest answer I can in the best faith to this! For context, this blog is a couple years old now, I have enough followers that I get a lot of active engagement on my posts etc, I am very active in TF fandom here, Twitter, and IRL, and while I did not used to be active I have been lurking in TF fandom as long as I have been on Tumblr.

There is absolutely still some toxicity; all fandoms have their bad faith actors, their drama hounds, their shipping Diskhorsers TM. I have gotten hate mail, I know folks who have issue with weird anon haters who are persistent, whatever. But no, it is not as bad as it has been in the past, IMO, not at ALL, and it is 100% possible to have an active, sociable and nice time in this fandom so long as you curate your engagement, with basically no drama at all. Many of the worst folks burned out and left when the fandom got less active and their shitstirring paid lesser and lesser dividends, IME.

People sometimes ask how I maintain such a vocal presence without falling into the still-there drama, and I have some advice that I promise you will mitigate like, 99% of the possible issues you could encounter:

Block whenever you feel like blocking. If you get a bad vibe, if you just don't personally like someone and don't wanna see them, if you see them throwing what looks like a temper tantrum you don't want in on, just block 'em. Remember: blocking is nothing personal towards the person you are blocking. It is not insulting and doesn't need to be 'earned'. Block every single person you think not blocking might even just theoretically cause stress or drama. (I am blocked by several people for reasons no more serious than 'I hate your OTP', and I commend every one of them for doing it and having a better time on this site!)

Delete any and all anon hate. Block anyone and everyone who sends you hate. No exceptions. No witty comebacks. No takedowns. Nothing. You see it and the actual literal second you do, you block and delete. None of it is worth one second of your time. Deprived of the oxygen, they will leave. And you won't be tempted to re-read it and stress out.

In that same vein, if it causes issues, just turn anon off! Turn it off. Personally I keep it on because I simply do not care about the odd troll, but if you care even slightly? Fuck 'em, turn it off, anon is a privilege your followers need to earn by acting in good faith.

Find people you like and follow them, ignore blatant shitstirring in the maintags (again: block people!) and try to curate content and follows and mutuals based on what you do like and not what you don't. Curate positive engagement; do not rely on the general fandom slurry, find what you like and hang out in your own corner of things that bring you joy. If the maintag stresses you out: don't check it. Check the blogs of folks you know are cool instead. Stuff like that.

Fandom should be fun. Fandom should be finding people you like and sharing good times with them, not stressing about avoiding folks you hate, or who hate you. Tumblr lets you moderate how you engage, when, and where more than almost any current social media site; now you can even turn off reblogs and oh my GOD is that a lifesaver function btw. If you want, you can make your blog unsearchable! It means you will need to be more proactive in making friends. But TF fandom is pretty tight knit these days, and folks want to talk a lot of the time. You'll still be able to engage with cool people.

There's way less aggro losers around these days, but more to the point, you can absolutely avoid the ones that still insist on being annoying and starve them out without much effort, tbh.

[nonhumanresources]

Caramel Changes

Here's one to get you into the spirit of the season! Short two page TF written all the way back in October 2017, when I did a series of stories for the season. I'd love to do more, autumn is my favorite time of year.

Summary: you get a weird piece of candy while trick or treating. You probably shouldn't eat that. You do.

What to expect: second person caramel-coating bird TF.

Length: 1.2k words. Fun fact, it's actually 1200 exactly including the title; I usually round.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Trick-or-treat!” you shout, holding out a pillowcase nearly filled to the brim. The frail old woman standing in the doorway smiles, showing off her three teeth.

“Oooh, hello there!” she says, her voice as rusty as the hinges on the door. “I’ve got some very exotic candy for you tonight! I made it myself, you know!” There’s a twinkle in her eye as she speaks, dropping a single wrapped caramel in each of your friend’s pillowcases, ending with yours, giving you a toothy smile and a small wink. She waves goodbye as you thank her and turn from the door, walking back down the weedy, unkempt walkway of cracked cement and back to the smooth sidewalk to continue your annual night of candy gathering.

One of your friends stops next to a trash can sitting out on the curb. He pulls out the caramel and tosses it into the black depths, never again to be seen by human eyes - unless someone happened to be living in the city dump. 

“We should throw these away. If that old hag really made them herself, there’s no telling what she might have put inside,” he says to the group. One by one, your friends mumble in agreement and pull out their own caramels, each piece sharing the fate of the first. Soon enough, everyone is down one candy and ready to move on.

Well, everyone but you.

Story below the cut, or here if you prefer to read on a Google doc. If you made it this far I am kissing you full on the lips platonically. Or is it platonic? It's queer, that's for sure. Comments/questions/thoughts always appreciated!

You hesitate, staring at the small square. Why would an old lady want to do something like poison candy? She had seemed nice enough. Besides, she was the only person so far who had seemed excited to be handing out free candy. While that was suspicious, to you, it seemed more kindly than anything. You tuck the caramel back into your bag. Your friends stare at you in surprise. 

The lead boy shrugs and turns around, tossing a remark over his shoulder. “It’s your funeral!” 

You shrug in turn and reply. “Whatever. Let’s go get more candy!”

The night moves on, and you load up on more and more candy until lifting your pillowcase becomes a full-body workout. A couple hours later, you’re shouting a farewell to your friends as they make the trek home. You nearly fall inside your bedroom door, exhausted. You dump your candy bag on the floor and fall over onto your bed, where one of the two pillows is missing it’s cover. You start to drift into sleep, but before you can enter the realms of dreams, you realize with a start: you hadn’t eaten a single piece of candy! Despite being around sweets for hours, you hadn’t eaten even a single branded chocolate; saving your Halloween candy was essential. One piece couldn’t hurt, though. You decide on something small - not too big, but not tiny, either. Something like…

...the caramel. You dig around in your pillowcase and pull it out. Now that you were in the light of your room, you could see colorful swirling patterns breaking up the normal monotone tan of caramel. What had the lady said? It was exotic? Whatever it was, it was like no other caramel you had ever seen, and it looked delicious. 

Unrolling the clear wrapper, you pop it into your mouth, excited. Some inevitably sticks to your fingers. The soft caramel melts in your mouth, spreading across your tongue, and down your throat. It leaves you with a warm feeling, almost like soft, warm butter being spread on your insides.

The caramel in your mouth thickens just a bit, sticking to your teeth. You try to work it around in your mouth, but it grows even thicker, locking your jaw in place. The warm feeling grows hot, and you hold a hand to your stomach as you start to feel nauseous. 

As you move your hand, you notice that your fingers refuse to bend. You look down in surprise. The caramel on your fingers had spread, coating your whole hand and locking it in place. You start to panic as the candy creeps across your body, spreading outwards from your hand and your stomach - some had gotten lodged on your shirt, too. Your clothes are pressed against you so tightly, they almost seem to become part of you. You hunch over as you are coated in sticky caramel. For a few seconds, your whole body is locked in place. You feel a pressure against your face, like the caramel was pushing into it. Or maybe your nose was pushing out of the caramel? Your arms feel are pulled around your stomach, and they almost seem to squish outwards, wrapping around yourself.

Soon - at least, you think it was soon; caramel had coated your perception of time, as well, leaving it slow-moving and awkward - soon, the caramel begins to loosen and the hot feeling begins to subside. You stomp, trying to knock the caramel off of your feet. You try to wiggle your toes, but they are… unwieldy. You quickly see why, as the caramel breaks off, revealing two large sets of talons on the ends of two large three-toed feet.

You pry your arms away from your sides as you wobble around on your now-pointy feet, trying to keep your balance. The caramel rips away along with them, hanging down in tattered shreds. It starts to fall away, dropping to the ground and revealing brightly colored wings underneath the hanging tatters instead of pink skin. You flap them frantically and fall over backwards. 

Your caramel shell shatters all across your backside, and a huge tail covered in brilliant hues unfurls behind you, spreading the length of the room. You yell in surprise, but your face is still covered in caramel. The effort tears away the candy covering your nose and mouth. A huge SQUAWK echoes out, and you fling your hands to your face. Feathered wings meet a large beak, and you let out another surprised squawk. 

Dizzy, you stumble upright and totter up to your mirror, your long tail dragging across the wooden floor behind you. What you see isn’t surprising, but it is still shocking: a huge bird, feathers askew, stares back at you from the mirror. You blink; the bird, your new form, blinks back. You realize that because of your many colors, you are most likely now male, regardless of any prior truth to that fact.

Your exhaustion gone, you flap your wings experimentally and rise a few inches into the air, your amazing plumage fragmenting the light into soft, multicolored shafts that decorate your room like a disco ball. While being a bird was disorienting, it certainly was dazzling. You drop back to the floor, talons clicking on wood. You aren’t nearly as clumsy now.

I could get used to this… you think, flexing your claws. An idea forms, and you smile as best you can with your curved beak. You hop onto your windowsill and pop open the latch, wriggling out into the night air. Why not go out for a night flight? After all, it’s not like matters could get much worse, and you could always stop by the old woman’s house to see if she had a cure. 

Maybe later, though. After all, you don’t become a bird every day.

[possumteeths]

2022 Writing Wrap Up

Tagged by: @screwyouflightlieutenant (thanks for thinking of me! 💖)

Total words published: 308,920 (christ???)

Additional words written:

Im gonna ballpark and say maybe 150 k other words with additional projects that arent fanfic lol (as well as fanfic wip)

Grand Total of Words: 458k ish?

Fandoms:

Various horror movies, Dragon age, Fallout, Mass effect, RDR, the boys

Highest Everything (raw kudos, hits, comments):

Unsurprisingly, its my the Boy chaptered fic Love Me Cancerously, This blew tf up and I really didn't expect it to. It is SO cool that other people like this not great movie and are so down for this rollercoaster i've been writing.

Highest Kudos to Hits Ratio:

It's still my Brahms fic, and the runner up is ANOTHER Brahms fic but that one's a oneshot.

New Things I Tried:

x readers! I never really liked reading or writing x readers ever until recently. I really like second person as a device and I just refuse to acknowledge things that use like blanks or the Y/N device lol. Realizing this totally changed the way I like to write. I think second person is excellent for storytelling. Leaving the reader insert extremely vague and writing from the perspective of the character is SO fun.

Fic I Spent The Most Time On:

Love Me Cancerously AGAIN lol. Usually I just kinda write things in one go, but for this fic I put it through multiple stages of editing.

Favorite Thing I Wrote:

This completely nonsensical fallout raider gangbang. I rarely enjoy reading or writing OC x OC works, but I really unlocked something in my brain with this fic. I am so in love with the characters, they still live in my head. I wanted it to be SILLY DUMB and it was just so much fun to write. This is the most "me" I think of anything I've ever written, and I fully just went balls to the wall ridiculously porny and it was so much fun.

Favorite Thing I Read:

dude ANYTHING by my buddy @ventiswampwater (here's her ao3) every single one of her fics make me INSANE. We have such similar ideas of characterization for this DUMB movie that for some reason we're obsessed with. I love cerebral poetic weirdo porn I just consume everything she's done over and over again. Seriously some of the best x readers i've ever come across.

@some27-url 's Deacon X SS series, I cant get ENOUGH of this fucked up dynamic. I gush on and on about this and I dont want to be annoying but I cannot shut up about how much I love this series

OH! This Yautja harem x OC work I found, literally I've never had the patience for LONG LONG fics before but I honestly wish there was MORE of this. I loved!! the characters and everyone involved, the story was so smutty and good. You dont need to know shit about predator lore this fic may as well be its own story. This fanfic is better than any smutty xenophilia/monsterfuckery romance book that i've ever read.

@brimbrimbrimbrim 's Vigilante x reader fic was so much fun, characterized SO well. It was silly fun and I loved it hahaha like I love this author but this fic really stuck out to me hahaha.

Writing goals for 2023:

I'd like to just bite the bullet and submit to publications as well as random magazine challenges or whatever else. I often debate whether I should or shouldnt for so long that I then miss the deadline for the actual challenge lmao! I submitted to a few horror magazines as well as some poems to indie publications asking for submissions this year but I'd like to just submit as much as I possibly can because fuck it y'know. This year, I got ONE poem selected to be in a book and then it was actually removed from the eventual publication coming out in 2023 so like... lmao?

New Works:

I've actually been editing my short story horror anthology off and on, cleaning it up and formatting it and all the boring shit. I'm looking to trad pub or at least submit certain stories to challenges. I'm also hoping to saddle up and adapt my raider gangbang fanfic into a more developed story that I'll eventually KDP publish. As for fanfics, I've got SO many fkn horror baddies x readers in the works rn, and like 21u314398240 90% done fanfics that I just need to edit and publish to ao3 lol.

tagging: @some27-url @gaeadene (girl I gotta know how many words u uploaded this year LOL) @ventiswampwater @korblez @wolfbirbisme @flaggermuser @butterbabyflapjack

Happy new year yall! Lets go full nuts and write WHATEVER ur silly lil heart desires. I declare this year the year of balls to the wall FUCK IT on ao3 lmfao

[maschotch]

You mentioning the fact that they're profilers is so real bc like it honest to god ASTOUNDS me how badly they all read hotch like he so so so so clearly cares for every member of the Bau WAAYYY more than he cares for him self and he's literally never shown otherwise??? Like even the whole drill boss stuff or whatever tf he said he's never aggressive with the group if they mess up he's always understanding but fair and most is pretty much the first one to comfort them (if the script allows) UNLESS he's going through some shit IE the whole divorce plot and foyet AND IT BAFFLES ME HOW EVERYONE FUCKING MISSES IT CONSIDERING ITS THEIR J O B

they’re all kinda bad at profiling each other but istg they have to TRY to understand hotch so poorly… i’m trying to think of a moment where he yells at them when they’re not directly putting themselves in danger or in the immediate aftermath of him getting attacked in his fucking home, but i cant think of anything?? he doesnt like being harsh with them and he learns the hard way with the elle situation that it doesnt get them anywhere. the only time he was unduly upset w someone was with emily in the beginning and that’s only bc he thought she was either a nepotism hire (which she kinda was) or a plant for strauss (which she kinda was)

he’s “strict” but like?? is he?? he does half their paperwork for them and they dont even know it. instead of doing things by the book and getting reid fired, he turned the other way and let him work through his drug problem. maybe he says “no” sometimes, but he usually relents anyway—like when jj has a feeling ab a case or when he calls the fucking vatican for emily. if he was a drill sergeant, would he let garcia keep a bunch of clutter on her desk and dress in bright clothing?? he doesnt coddle them or anything bc that’s not really his personality, but he’s gentle w them and even praises them when he knows they need it. he doesnt always step in and help when he should (i think that honestly has more to do w him being self conscious than anything—he doesnt want a drill sergeant/bully to make things worse), but he keeps a close eye on each of their wellbeing and will quietly urge one of the others to help out if someone’s in a tough spot

sure he doesn’t smile a whole lot and he’s known for his perpetually neutral face, but at the same time it’s not very hard to tell how he’s feeling. he’s effective at his job, he’s good at playing the tough guy, but tbh he let’s things get to him easily. he takes their criticism to heart and does his best to be better. he HATES seeing any of them hurt: ever notice how after what happened with elle he never uses his own agents as bait like that again? he either uses himself (like the fight club episode) or one of the team volunteers and he relents (like emily in the omegaverse swingers episode). they misread his social awkwardness as being cold when really i think he’s just mildly uncomfortable being the center of attention in an unprofessional setting.

it’s wild to me how frequently they misjudge him. i think he kinda knows and almost encourages it?? while still considering their judgements genuine?? morgan is a great example: of all his subordinates, morgan has worked with him the longest, since before he was in charge of the team. so you’d think morgan would have the best insight. but morgan has a complicated relationship w authority figures and tends to be automatically defensive out of habit. essentially, he’s been projecting on hotch since day one and has been blinded by the convoluted series of lenses he sees hotch through: as a constantly rotating mixture of buford, stilinski, and his father. it’s prevented him for actually seeing hotch for who he is, and hotch seems to make no real effort to correct any of those presumptions. but hotch still takes it personally when morgan criticizes him (prob bc it feeds his own negative view of his self worth and uses it as justification for whatever self loathing bullshit he’s on)

basically, hotch knows everyone has skewed perceptions of him and is fine letting their delusions continue uninterrupted—encourages it, even. he’s more comfortable receiving scathing remarks, even if they’re inaccurate, bc it allows him to continue his own delusion ab his place in the world. if they hate him (or if he thinks they hate him), it gives him a reason to hate himself. which is why i think he kinda likes that they’re bad at profiling him. it’s a way to receive that negative attention without actually being vulnerable. it’s a very very passive manipulation—more like he’s allowing them to manipulate themselves—that feeds his self loathing. i think he does it on purpose, so i cant necessarily fault the others for so drastically misunderstanding hotch. especially since they do get better at it over the seasons: they’re able to see through his defense mechanisms a little more, even if they still cant see him clearly

[taegularities]

Now that the pain has passed I can finally leave a baby ass review

Rid. RID. How do you manage to make us feel so much? I cried reading this fic, I felt the pain right in my bones and I literally could not stop. You have a way with words that just makes me break and heal and smile and cry and I hope you appreciate that precious talent of yours as much as you should <3 cmi is a work of art from start to finish, and it is definitely the kind of story that will stick with me for a while. I can’t wait to see more of Jungkook’s pov bc homie is fucking up real bad. I can’t wait to see reader with hobi bc it’s pretty obvious that that’s where this is going (hopefully not lmao). I can’t wait to see Jungkook and reader finding their way back together bc I know for a fact that you don’t write sad endings

Oof. Just so many emotions and so little words in a dictionary to explain just how much I feel each time I’m reading you. Thank you for sharing your art on this platform✨

But I am still in pain. Do not think that I’m not in pain smh… that okay.. okay at the end?? NOT OKAY. She should fight for him, tell him that she’ll move out and drop the job and become a writer bc that’s what she needs to do if she wants to be with him. And he needs to stop thinking he doesn’t belong in her world bc he literally IS her world like come on jungkook😭

Brb, I’m going to go cry some more

ella, two days later and i'm still so 🥺🥺🥺 about this review. you're too kind and i don't deserve you and i love you and i just, i'm running out of words, bc how tf is everyone here so kind, i'm fkn baffled ??? 😭

i definitely appreciate whatever i put in my docs, but the biggest reason for it are readers like you 🥺 i mean, i'm 100% sure i wouldn't have the confidence to put out so many chapters of a slice of life fic if you weren't so encouraging and sweet about it. like... "a work of art from start to finish"? how could i not feel all the motivation in the world, reading such praises :(((

okay whew, once again, we're a little more emotional today hahaha

but anyway, yes, you're so right. homie is fucking up real bad, but i also hope you guys will understand him a little better after the next chapter. i'm already working on it and my heart is in shambles. ha ha also the hobi bit 🥴 no comment...

yes, absolutely correct!! we don't do sad endings in taegularities town 💕

THE "Okay... Okay" GOSH, THE STAR OF THIS CHAPTER FR. i love and hate how much this has been affecting everyone bc same 😭 like, she wants to fight for him, but she's also done yknow?? she just. shut herself off :( her becoming a writer is such a good idea. it'd be so nice if both could follow their artistic dreams.

and yep, once again.. "he literally IS her world" broke my heart. that's it. ella i love you. a lot. please don't forget, you're one of so many lovely people who keep me going on this platform, and i'll never be able to express my gratitude <33

[magical-glimpse]

Hi thank you so much for being so understanding. I want to answer a few of the questions in ur ask. U asked do u usually feel goosebumps when listening to music and my answer would be a no. It doesn't. Maybe I would cry if the song is so good but this is a totally new experience for me. Maybe he is just so good at singing.

I too sing and this one time a girl told me that they liked my singing and instead of just saying a thank you I asked her name the girl told her my name and the girl was never seen again 🤣 I am super awkward when it comes to this.

Also about the signs I once asked for a military tank to show. I was asking about his new song seven. I totally forgot about it later and in the evening I was casually googling about the mandela effects. I was going through an article having 16 or so (I don't remember) such instances and in it was a military tank and while reading it I thought nothing of it. It only struck me later.

And this dream I had about JK was not an innocent dream 🥲 I did not mention everything that happened in the dream and I would never I am sorry. I am sincerely sorry to whomever who could be his fs or tf. These days I hardly get any rest. I passed an incredibly tough exam which around 5 lakh people attended and in which only 8% people got through. I was working very hard.

Since I have passed the prelims I should study hard for the mains coming next month. Also I am in charge of the kitchen cleaning everything. In addition to that studying and attending class. It has been a week since I have been in this situation. But I have no complaints.

I was emotionally very disturbed due to some issues in the family and still I managed to get through the prelims. I believe in myself. Whatever it is maybe I will get through.

I have been so tired that I hardly get any energy to check the phone. And then this dream. If this is the way he is checking on his armies I don't know what to say 🥲

I am going to avoid him like the plague. Right now my focus should be on the exam coming next month. Everyone around me is having high expectations. I need to work harder.

I am no longer going to focus on this whole thing because at the end what matters to me the most is where I want to be career wise. I want 2023 to be my year. I don't want to take any more chances.

I mean if it wasnt an innocent dream it was likely just your brain night salad.

Good luck on your exams and your studies!

[thementalshawty]

Love your FS readings and the images you use for them! Thank you.😭🥹💜

The thing is, they always come after readers who are just minding their business and trying to help others. They never go after readers who are being messy with these celeb tarot readings which I find can be so invasive and toxic AF. Like why would you ever read that someone you don't even know will d*e soon, has mental issues or will suffer a miscarrage. Then further trying to readabout the celeb's fs or relatives saying some awful things about them. I think they are the worst tarot readers and part of the community because they say all this toxic bs without check and people lap it up. I think it's spiritually invasive and wrong to read on these people or anyone that doesn't consent, then saying f.... Up shit about them for kiii and views.

FS readers aren't doing this and most are providing general guidance to actually help instead about just being messy and gossiping (projecting)horrible s... about people.

FS readings aren't always frivolous or crazy, so many of them are very helpful! I've seen some saying how people need to work on their doubts or stop judging themselves and comparing themselves to others because none of that is helpful in the long run and is only pushing you out of alignment and its true! I had so much doubt that I wasn't going to meet my person or I'm on the wrong path because I'm not doing what others are doing within my friends group and these readings helped me push through that. I still have a few doubts but not as bad as before and now I’m just focusing on me and mine. Not looking outside to others or comparing because my journey is unique. Also reading about how my guides protect this Union and the journey towards it just gave me SO MUCH PEACE!! Feeling and knowing that I wasn’t crazy and my dreams were real, that the person I was manifested really was my fs and I needed to trust myself, my guides and the signs I had been given because it was real. These readings have strengthened me and empowered me so much and I’m grateful for YOU and other readers who do them and have gotten me to where I need to be mentally, spiritually and emotionally for my FS to come through as was destined. Sorry for my long rant and thank you!💜💕✨

No

Other

Fuccin

Words!

This was well said HENNNYYYYY!!!

And I will add

This is why I do it because of the ones I do help and do believe and that’s why the saying goes if you don’t Fucc with it, don’t bother it! Just stfu and keep scrolling. Tf you stopping commenting or feeling the need to share your opinion on sumn you don’t care for in the community that do? That just screams attention seeking trolls! Like cool you don’t Fucc with it, TF IT GOT TO DO WITH US THAT DO! Again putting others down because they themselves don’t get it! Keep believing and having faith, that’s going to unlock more about how to love yourself, you need to embody the love that you want your FS or whatever to give you, to manifest it so these readers are indeed putting self help through it and shadow work teaching you how to love yourself isn’t our fuccin job nor our fuccin guides job to provide your asses with shit! Spiritual guidance or not! Mfccas keep forgetting we connect to our guides so they can help US the individual! But we feel we can share clarity to everyone who comes across our readings, that in itself is more fuccin spiritual clarity and guidance that your asses should be getting because that’s our energy that we invested to get clarity for the ones who aren’t doing it for themselves. WE ALL HAVE FUCCIN GUIDES AND SHIT SO TAP IN IF YOU’RE NOT SATISFIED WITH WHAT YOU SEEING ONLINE OR WHEREVER! Love is a strength most people to weak and afraid to tap into, including myself! Which is why like you I enjoy my OWN PAC along with other readers and yeah sometimes they’re FS readings and they all ALLL EVERY SINGLE ONE IVE READ! Had given advice nothing but advice on empowering yourself to bring them in! To manifest ANYTHING! Intention must be set! Focus must be had all this sound like self work and awareness to bring in what you want regardless if it’s healing or love even abundance it’s wacc when they make you guys feel like it’s a toxic environment I don’t want you guys internalizing their bitterness it will become a part of you and you’ll stray away from your path! Which happens TOOO FUCCIN OFTEN! Don’t stop believing babe!