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thewalkingdead-imagines · 3 years

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TWD - Negan Imagine ~ “Diverged”

Imagine for the 21st episode of Season 10

Summary: Follow Negan and the Reader through the days after Maggie’s arrival in Alexandria, through struggles and tension, domestic bliss, and a special little celebration.

Warning: Smut

Day 1 after Maggie’s arrival Warm morning sun was streaming through the windows of the living room and the kitchen, filling it up with a warmth that you very much needed after the nerve-wracking last night. You hadn’t slept badly, but your body was still letting you know that it didn’t like the ordeal of fear and tears you’d put it through last night. You tried to stay positive, new day, new game, but the thought that you could run into Maggie any moment you’d step foot out of your house gave you a feeling of the ugly kind. “Fuck, really needed that coffee”, Negan groaned as you watched him take a big gulp from his cup, his figure still a little slumped over the table and his face was still painted in the remaining exhaustion that was stuck in him as well. “Mhm me too”, you sighed, reaching for your cup, taking another sip while you could feel Negan’s hand reaching for yours, taking it into his grasp as he cleared his throat slightly. “So we’re just gonna-” Cut off by two quick knocks on the door your glimpse shot up from your cup, darting right at the door, revealing Gabriel’s black clothed figure right behind its windows. Your stomach started to sink from one moment to another, unsure what to think, unsure what he would do and say now that Maggie was back, unsure if he was here to try and snap Negan’s freedom back again, or if it was just something trivial that had brought him here. “Fuck”, it fell from Negan’s lips the same moment a tense sound fell from yours and you stood up from your spot, letting go of Negan’s hand to move towards the door while your heart started to drum against your chest, pounding harshly as you finally pushed down the handle. “Morning, can I come in?”, the priest asked, the look on his face not readable enough for you to know whether he had good or bad news. “Sure”, you only nodded, gulping thickly as he walked past you towards the table, watching him closely as you followed him. “Mornin’ Gabey boy”, Negan chuckled, overplaying any of the stress and fear he clearly felt too. The bright grin was plastered onto his face, but just one look into his eyes gave away what he was truly feeling right now. “Morning to you too, Negan. I just got some updates for the both of you”, he said, looking in between the both of you and finally, he seemed to pick up on the thick tension that was laying in the air.

“It’s nothing negative, no need to worry”, he quickly added and while a burden already seemed to fall from your shoulders and your heart started to slow down its relentless pounding, a part of you was still on edge. “Aaron and I will leave for an extensive run in a few hours. Maggie provided us with a map with possible scavenging locations further out. I just thought it would be good to let you know, also concerning the council”, he said as he looked to you while you were still nearly hanging onto his lips, waiting for him to finish so you could be sure that no bad surprise was waiting for you,”With both of us gone, most of the remaining council is gone as well, there’s only you, Nora and Kyle left...which means it is inactive for the time being, as soon as we’re back, we will look for new members and make any decisions together.” “And what does that mean for us?”, Negan finally asked, the grin gone as the tension broke through his facade as he glanced up to the priest, “C’mon Gabe, You just said it, Maggie is back. So as long as you and spikey boy are out there we’ll just continue as before? Do our work and live here?” “That’s the plan”, he nodded,”I’ve told you before, every helping hand is needed and living in this home has worked during the last days as well. A well rested worker is a good worker. So yes, you will continue as before.” “And others know that as well? As long as you’re gone we can count on this?”, you asked, still too tense to trust it all completely yet no matter how much you wanted to believe it,“I just...I just want to be sure that Maggie’s presence won’t spontaneously change things while you’re gone. We won’t start anything of course, we’ll keep our distance, I just want to be sure that we can count on this now.” “You can”, he nodded once more, sighing as he still saw the suspicion on both of your faces. You wished it was different, you wished you could act and be a little more lighthearted and less tense but you’d been disappointed too many times before and you weren’t gonna let that happen again, not if you had any chance to avoid it. “I’ve told Kyle and Nora...and yes, I’ve let Daryl know as well just as Maggie does. I’m not saying she likes it but this decision is set in stone for as long as we’re gone”, he said, looking in between the both of you, “And as I told you last time, I generally see no problem in keeping the situation permanently as it is.” “Okay, thank you, Gabe”, you finally got out, allowing yourself to let his words finally calm you while Negan joined in, sighing softly as he got the priest’s attention. “I know I’ve been screwing with you here and there but I appreciate this, Gabey, Really”, he said, looking straight but entirely genuine at the other man, who started to clear his throat slightly. “Good...I am not entirely sure how long this run will take, but it will be something around two weeks. I’ll see you when I’m back”, he started, looking once more in between the both of you before he started to head towards the door again. “Take care”, you said as you moved in behind him, reaching for his arm to stop him for a moment as he was about to step outside, “I mean it, thank you. This means a lot.” He only gave you another look, a slightly warmer one you’d rarely seen in him during the last while before he nodded slightly and slipped outside, leaving you at the doorstep for a moment as the fresh morning breeze brushed over your face and allowed you to relax slightly and process the news that were much better than you’d actually anticipated. For now, things were good, and you’d just appreciate that to the fullest.

2 days after Maggie’s arrival Business as usual. Just like Gabriel had proposed. You hadn’t seen Maggie on the streets of Alexandria at all yesterday, only one or two of her people and you were quite grateful that it had stayed that limited after the tumultuous night you’ve had before, though you knew that it certainly wouldn’t stay that way. They were probably getting that house ready that Maggie had simply picked for them, and while that fact irked you a little, you were partly grateful that it bought you some more time to adjust. Still half lost in your thoughts you moved through the quiet infirmary, only hearing Steve move something around on the first floor, collecting some new bed sheets for the only stationary patient you had at the moment. “I got you, only this one more step”, an unfamiliar male voice rumbled from the porch dully into the room, just loud enough for your attention to spike up and turn you into the direction of the voice. Tilting your head you glimpsed through the windows, trying to sort the voice to a face and from one moment to another, it was crystal clear to you why you didn’t recognize it. The voice didn’t belong to an Alexandrian, Hilltoper or even former Kingdom resident, those were two of Maggie’s people. A shudder ran down your back as you watched the man whose voice you’d just heard help the blonde woman he propped with his arms towards the door, slow but still not slow enough for you to prepare yourself for the situation. Did they know who you were? Did Maggie or maybe any other person in here already point it out to them? For a moment, you wanted to call Steve downstairs, to take no chances and avoid unnecessary confrontations but you didn’t have enough time for that left and a small part of you hoped that doing a good job now might benefit you and Negan at some other point. Still, it didn’t leave you any less tense as the man pushed the door open, his eyes on the floor until the both of them moved a little more into the room and he finally looked up. “Morning, we’re here to get a new bandage for her foot”, he rumbled, tucking a loose strand of his dark hair back into his low bun as you moved towards the both of them, trying to find some kind of recognition in his eyes but at least for now, it didn’t seem like he knew who you were, and if that was the case, it might be best to keep it this way. You weren’t in the mood for confrontations. Not here. Not now. “Sure, just help me get her on the cot”, you said, smiling softly as you moved in next to the woman, propping her just enough to get her comfortably onto the nearest cot and a sigh of relief left her lips as soon as she could adjust herself and relieve her foot from any weight that had still lasted onto it. “I’ll quickly get some stuff to wrap this up again”, you said as you moved towards the counters, a certain tension still lasting onto you as you reached for the small notebook with notes you kept about the patients, searching for the latest fitting entry of the day before yesterday that fit to her injury. “Your name’s Linda, right?”, you asked as you glimpsed up from the book, watching as the younger woman looked up and nodded softly. “You’re keeping track of the patients?”, the man asked, curious as he tilted his head a little to glimpse at the book. “Yeah, makes it easier to know for any follow up appointments what drugs, salves or else were used”, you said, still with a friendly look on your face as you nodded back to the book, “Also easier to keep track on how much of meds we still got left, just makes things a lot faster and simple.” “Yeah I’m just asking ‘cause our doc back at our old village did the same thing, had a book that looked exactly like that one, just had me curious”, he said, a bittersweetness in his voice before he let out a thick sigh,”Not sure if you heard but the reason we left is the same reason she got injured...hurt herself when the rest of our group fled from that bastard in the woods.”´ß “Yeah I did”, you nodded, moving in to grab what you needed, glimpsing in between the book and Linda and Cole as you threw the supplies into a small basket, ready to use them as you made your way back and gave her a small smile,”Gonna make sure you’re fully back on your feet quickly.” “I’m Cole by the way”, he said the moment you reached them, extracting his hand out to you and with that, sending just another shiver of tension through you as you realized that there was no way past introducing yourself anymore. “Well then nice to meet you, Cole”, you said, giving him another smile, trying to give him one last kind impression of yourself before you gulped thickly as you accepted his hand, only hoping that this would be the first time he’d hear your name. “I’m (Y/N).” It wasn’t the first time. it most definitely wasn’t. From one moment to another, it seemed to click in him. His kind looking dark eyes widened slightly before they narrowed as his face fell flat, saying with that expression more than 1000 words ever could while his grip on your hand loosened. “Well, then let’s get this done, huh?”, you could hear yourself awkwardly mumble as you let go of his hand, trying to act as if this hadn’t just happened while you only hoped that he would just give you the silent treatment instead of spewing a remark. Tensely you started to get to work, trying to ignore what had just happened though you could very much tell that they were eyeing you. Linda more than Cole, but the looks you could see him giving you from the corner of your eyes were still obvious enough to notice. Thorough but as fast as you could you finished the job, making sure to not look as tensed as you felt before you finally tossed the last bit of scraps back into the basket and looked back up again. “Alright, it’s done. You can come back anytime you feel like you need a bandage change, if nothing happens and it mostly stays in place, you could come by tomorrow evening or the day after”, you said, just trying to act as if this situation wasn’t as awkward and tense as it truly was. With that, you only got a short “Thanks” and “Bye” of them and right after those words had been spoken, they got themselves out of the infirmary without saying just another word. And while this was by far not the worst case scenario, you knew that your time of adjusting was over with these few minutes that were surely just the beginning of a ton of tense encounters. “Delivery for the doc?”, a warm, familiar voice filled up the room, its suddeness that cut through the silence from one moment to another letting you flinch as you turned around and saw Negan standing by the side entrance door with a large wooden box in his hands that he quickly let down by the door as he moved inside towards you. “Fuck, you look like ya saw a damn ghost. Did I scare you that much?”, he chuckled as he reached you, moving in to grasp your jaw and press a kiss over your lips. Humming you leaned into him, kissing him back until he slowly let go of you and looked over your face, almost as if he was trying to read off of your expression what exactly was wrong. “Two of Maggie’s people were here just now”, you eventually mumbled, watching his face tense up quickly before you shook your head softly. “They didn’t do anything but their attitude changed up real quick once they heard my name”, you mumbled, sighing softly as you shrugged your shoulders,”At least didn’t throw any remarks around but the silence was awkward as hell.” Negan only nodded, his face a little less tense than before but still far from relaxed as you leaned up to press another small kiss over his lips. “Now what’s the delivery? I’m curious”, you asked, trying to switch up the topic as you nodded towards the box that still stood by the door and Negan’s face began to light back up. “Went out with your colleague’s husband today and got some cuts for those herbs you needed”, he said as he let go of you and strolled over to the door to heave the box with a small grunt up and carry it over to the counter by your side ,”Daniel and I wanna go out an dig ‘em up some other day. Steve told him getting some tinctures and salves done is kinda urgent so we thought we’d get some cuts for y’all first.” “Oh that’s awesome”, you said, glimpsing into the box that was filled with neatly tied bundles of herbs, though your excitement wasn’t only directed at the new supplies but also at the fact that Negan seemed to have had a rather positive experience with another Alexandrian, and he could use that at the moment. “We got a bunch of chamomile, some burning nettles, comfrey, burdock, dandelions and some lavender”, Negan mumbled as he gestured into the box as you peeked inside,”Reading those damn plant books down in that fucking cell finally pays off. First that Hogweed shit with Aaron and now this.” A chuckle fell from your lips as you reached inside the box and grasped the small bundle of lavender and held it up to your nose to smell its calming scent. “Oh this smells so good”, you mumbled, backing a little off to glimpse at the small and pretty lilac blossoms ,”Crazy how fast everything’s blooming now. Feels like those pretty wildflowers by the woodhouses also just popped up from one day to another.” Laying the lavender back into the box you moved closer to Negan to wrap your arms around his neck and lean into kiss him softly, smiling as you leaned back to glimpse at him. “Thank you”,you mumbled, reaching your hand up to run it trough his dark hair and elicited a small, content groan to fall from Negan’s lips ,”How were things with Daniel outside?” “Actually pretty damn good”, Negan said, the grin on his face growing a little wider and some more relief spread through you,”Nice guy, really...felt good just being looked at like a normal damn person.” “See”, you mumbled, giving him another smile,”Told you there’s also people who’ve grown to accept you. Not everything’s bad.” Slowly, Negan nodded, the smile still resting on his lips. Things wouldn’t become easier, if anything had shown you that it was the encounter with Cole and Linda just now, but these little positive news were enough to let you realize once more that there were still people in this town that were starting to accept Negan. You just couldn’t let the opinions of those that still despised him overshadow those who were willing to give him an honest chance to start anew.

4 days after Maggie’s arrival A deep sigh fell from your lips as you fumbled the DVD of the likely most horrible horror movie you’d watched to this day out of the console, popping it quickly back into its packaging to push it, hopefully, to never be seen again into the TV shelf. Glimpsing over your shoulder you watched as Negan poured the both of you new drinks in the kitchen, waiting for you to choose the next thing to watch for your daily little movie night that would hopefully distract you from the cliché filled atrocity you’d just watched. Shifting on the fluffly carpet you moved along the backs of the DVD packages until you found the one you wanted and pulled it out just as you saw the lights in the kitchen turn off again and heard Negan’s footsteps coming closer. “Watcha poppin’ in there?”, he asked, curiously rising his eyebrows as he tried to peek at the package in your hands and took a small sip of his whiskey. ““Can you resist?” I need something trashy and fun after that bummer”, you said with a small chuckle and held the tacky, and bright colored packaging up, just enough for Negan to see it as he sat down on the edge of the couch and brightly grinned at you. “Need something to calm ya down?”, he asked, tease swinging heavily through his voice ,”Was that thing too scary for you?” “No”, you quickly retorted before you popped the package open,“I just need to erase that crap from my mind.” “Sure thing.” “Asshole”, you chuckled in response to his comment that just oozed sarcasm, leaning in over to him to give his leg a small, playful slap while a thick laugh rumbled up his throat. Glimpsing back down you moved the DVD into the console, a little more eager to finally get it running. The first four episodes that you’d watched during the last nights had already been nothing but a fun guilty pleasure, that got so much better with Negan’s remarks about the candidates and whatever actions they were pulling at the moment. If you were honest, those remarks were likely what you enjoyed most about watching the show. “I swear if Sarah and Chad are the first fuckin’ faces we see, I’m gonna lose my shit”, Negan groaned as he stood up from the couch’s edge and moved back to his usual spot, plopping down onto it, careful to not spill any of your drinks as he threw his legs onto the cushions. “I’ve never seen two people on TV who’ve got on my nuts that much”, he scoffed, sipping once more on his glass as you grabbed the remote and moved back over to him,”I get it, not fuckin’ is hard but not so fuckin’ hard to resist if 100 thousand dollar are on the damn line. Just resist for a while and then have a big-ass fuckfest after you collect the damn coin.” “At least the drama’s good”, you chuckled back, reaching for your glass as you moved in next to him and started the show, almost eager to forget about that dumb movie and hear what kind of remarks Negan had to offer up for this episode. “That’s true”, he mumbled as you set your glass back on the coffee table and cuddled up to his side, watching the screen load before another contestant’s face showed up on the screen and a relieved groan fell from Negan’s lips,”Oh thank god...Y’know who that guy reminds me of?” Glancing up you looked in between Negan and the young man that was shown on TV, trying to figure out for a moment who he could refer to before you shook your head and watched Negan’s grin flare up once more. “Gabey.” “What?”, it fell from your lips with a laugh, as you glimpsed confused back to Negan. “Y’know he’s acting all coy and shit but I bet he might be kinkier than we think”, he said, grinning widely as he bit his lip before he gestured to the TV ,”I’m sure he’s gonna get laid by that Valerie girl.” “You sure he won’t be able to resist?”, you mumbled, tilting your head a little as said Valerie showed up on screen and started to move towards Gabey 2.0 ,”He’s been responsible till now.” “Till now”, Negan grinned, holding his pointing finger up before he snickered and grinned just a little wider,”He’s gonna break at some point...especially if she keeps on inviting him on those dates...and I can’t wait for the shit storm that will break loose once that happens.”

7 days after Maggie’s arrival The sun was already nearing the skyline of the trees and filled the air with its warm light as you reached your home after a long day of work. You’d stayed a little longer at the infirmary today, fixing up some new tinctures with the herbs that Negan and Daniel had brought in and by now, you were just glad to finally come home and fill your stomach up with whatever delicious meal Negan had prepared by now. Once you reached your home you quickly moved up the porch, taking two steps at the time only to hear the door opening as soon as you reached the top. “Hey Sweetheart”, Negan said, a wide grin on his face as he leaned against the doorframe while your eyes ran over him. Usually, he was already in his comfortable clothes around this time, ready to just relax for the rest of the day but now, he looked like he’d freshly slicked back his hair and threw some fresh dark gray pants on and a white shirt on. You most definitely weren’t complaining, but you were still surprised. “Hey”, you said back, grinning back at him as you moved in to greet him with a kiss, peeking curiously past him as you caught a high vase on the dinner table that was filled with the pretty wildflowers you’d seen blooming by the woodhouses and that only sparked your curiosity further. “What’s going on here?”, you asked as you leaned a bit back and tilted your head slightly, watching as something that looked a little but like nervousness spread over his face as he took your hand and lead you inside, where you could already smell the delicious scent of Negan’s spaghetti sauce filling the air. “Y’know...around this time last year I put that ring on your finger”, he said as he closed the door behind you and looked down to your hand before glimpsing right back up at you with a warm but still slightly nervous look in his eyes,”I can’t be sure about the exact date but I...I thought it would be nice to celebrate our anniversary in some way...I just wanted to do something special for you.” From one moment to another the smile on your lips got wider, bringing warmth all over you as you looked from the flowers in the vase, to the few burning thick candles, to the nicely set table and the fresh basket of self made biscuits that was laying beside the cutlery. “Wow, I-” “You said you liked ‘em so I thought they’d make a nice bouquet, uhm-”, Negan said as he nodded towards the flowers. The slight nervousness that filled the usually so confident and self-assure man was honestly adorable and you found yourself charmed as he moved from your side over to his chair and picked up something that he’d been hiding there till now ,”I got something else for you too.” With that he lifted up a pretty, dark brown leather bound notebook from its spot, a loving look filling his eyes as he moved back over to you. “You always said you wanted to create some kinda handbook for those healing herbs and stuff but you never actually got to do it before...so when I was out there getting those herb cuts, I got the idea and thought I’d start it for you.” “Holy shit”, it left your lips as you reached in to accept his gift, already smiling widely as you glimpsed at the notebook,”Thank you.” Your mouth fell softly open as you glanced down, running your thumb over the soft leather as more warmth filled you. Spending your time either working at the infirmary or being down by Negan in his cell for the last years had never given you the time to start a book like this, and it got you even happier now that it was him who gave it to you. It was personal and it was perfect and as you finally opened it the smile on your face grew only wider.

To the best wife (and doc) ever! Happy anniversary, Sweetheart I love you

Negan’s handwriting filled the whole top of the first page, neat and not as messy as you were used to it and you could tell that it had cost him some effort to get it this way. And just as your eyes swayed over the last three words they got captured by the smaller written line at the bottom of the page. P.S. You have, and always will, give my dick and my heart the biggest boner!

With that, a laugh fell from your lips as your eyes ran over the sentence, while the smile on your lips surely turned into an everlasting one. You loved the sweet message on the top of the page, but this down there was Negan through and through and that made it even more special to you. “First thought I’d hold myself a bit back in case you’d want others to look into it too”, Negan chuckled as you finally glimpsed up to him from the book and he winked at you,”Couldn’t go through with it all the way tho.” “I’m glad you didn’t”, you chuckled, your curiosity taking over again as you started to turn the pages and found yourself loving the book more and more with every second. Negan had taken a leaf or blossom of each of the herbs that he’d found outside, dried them and carefully glued them into the book, dedicating a page for each of the dried samples with their names written neatly on top of them and with enough pages left between each of them for you to fill with whatever notes and knowledge you had about them. “Oh my”, it fell from your lips as you browsed through the book that must have been a whole lot of work, especially considering that he always only had time to work on it whenever he got earlier back from his shifts than you. “Wish I could give you more, I know it’s not much-”, you suddenly heard him start, cut off by your sudden movement as you looked up at him and glanced wide eyes at him. “Are you kidding me?”,you asked, a soft chuckle falling from your lips as you widely smiled at him ,”This is so awesome. I love it!” Negan’s face began to light up as his eyes roamed over your happy face, his glance softening as you sat the book carefully down onto the table and moved in to hug him tightly. “Thank you so so much”, you mumbled, nuzzling your nose into his warm neck while his arms wrapped around you and pulled you closer into his embrace,”This is so sweet.” You’d never had such a thing as an anniversary before, there had never been this moment where the both of you had decided that you were a couple, it had just happened, little by little until you found yourself in love with one another and you’d always liked it this way. But this, this was special. It was something you’d never been able to do during all these years down in that cell and celebrating just anything with him now got you happy, just as the realization that you’d been calling him your husband for a year now. Leaning back you tipped up to meet his lips in a kiss, humming into him before you could feel a tiny bit of guilt starting to prick you as you realized that you were pretty much empty handed. “Now I don’t even have anything for you”, you mumbled as you let got of his lips, watching as Negan quickly shook his head. “And you don’t need to”, he mumbled, moving in to cup your face with his hands as he leaned down to press another kiss over your lips,”What you did during the last years is more than I could ever give back to you.” A small sigh left his lips as he glimpsed at you, licking his lips as his eyes stayed fixed on you. “Shit, everything you dragged down that cell to make it look more comfy was basically a damn gift”, he mumbled, a small snort falling from his lips before he shrugged his shoulders softly,”I could never give you one.” “You gave me this”, you said, holding up your left hand and the slim diamond wedding ring Negan had fixed up for you,”That’s a pretty big one.” A hum fell from Negan’s lips as his eyes swayed from the ring back to you as you let your arm lower and wrap back around his torso again. “I’m serious tho”, you mumbled, sure to keep his eyes locked on yours ,”I know you won’t believe that but you’ve given me just as much as I have given you, in one way or another. We’re even, Negan.” He softly nodded, and even though he did, you knew he’d never truly think this way. “Thank you so much for this”, you mumbled, looking over from the flowers and the notebook back at your husband ,”It’s perfect...I don’t even really know what to say I just-....I love you so much.” “I love you too”, Negan mumbled back, moving back in to kiss you, this time longer and with more passion, until your knees started to feel gooey and you found yourself melted against him. Slowly and reluctantly, Negan let go of your lips and leaned his forehead against yours, smiling widely as you heard the blubbering of the still simmering tomato sauce on the stove and let a small chuckle fall from your lips. “I want some of those spaghetti now tho...I’m starving.”

The spaghetti were as great as always and you quickly filled your stomach up with the delicious meal, loving every little moment of your anniversary dinner with Negan until you decided to quickly hop under the shower so you could enjoy the rest of the night with him down in the living room. With a towel wrapped around your body and busy with drying off your hair with another, smaller one you moved from the bathroom back into the bedroom, lost in your thoughts for a moment as your eyes swayed over the trees outside that were only enlighted by now by the faint moonlight until your eyes dropped from the windows and landed on Negan’s leatherjacket that laid over the back of the desk-chair. Smiling softly you moved towards it, running your fingers over the smooth leather until it clicked within you from one moment to another and an idea quickly rose up into your head that would allow you to still give Negan a little gift for the anniversary as well. Dropping the towel from your body you tossed it along with the smaller one to the bed and grabbed the jacket to slip it over your bare body, chuckling to yourself as you already imagined his reaction to it and could feel an anticipating tingling growing quickly within you. A small grin already laid on your face as you adjusted the oversized jacket on your body and started to move downstairs as quietly as you could, aiming to not let Negan see you until you wanted him too. Peeking inside the living room you saw him sitting relaxed on the couch, leaned back into the cushions and with his back darted towards you as he looked through some DVDs. Gulping softly you moved forwards, extra careful to not step onto the floorboards that were usually squeaking a little underneath your feet until you stood right behind Negan. Slowly, you lowered yourself a little until you could wrap your leather clad arms around him from behind and leaned in, just enough to align your lips with his ear. “I have a little surprise for you after all”, you whispered, immediately hearing a sharp breath falling from Negan’s lips as he turned around and stared with wide eyes at you that started to narrow as soon as his glance wandered over you. “Holy fuck”, he growled, licking his lips as he rushed up from the couch and rounded it within seconds, hurrying over to you while his eyes already filled with the lust you knew all too well. ”Thought we could check off another goal from that bucket list of yours”, you said with a grin as soon as he reached you, his eyes still roaming over you like a hungry predator that was looking at its prey. ”Oh for fuckin’ sure”, you could hear him murmur as he leaned down to met you in a rough kiss, his hands already starting to move underneath the leather and wander over your bare skin. Running your hands through his hair you winced softly against his lips as he lead you towards the dinner table, groaning into you as your body met the wood. ”This gotta be a fuckin’ dream”, he grumbled, only letting go of you to look down at you,”Don’t know how often I’ve imagined you wearing only that jacket, fuck.” You quickly found yourself in another rough kiss, only breaking it to get the rest of the stuff off the table along with the vase of flowers and the notebook before you felt Negan pushing you against it, more than ready to take this further. “Fuckin’ hell”, you heard him groan against your lips as his hands moved below the jacket and cupped your breasts, fondling them and brushing his rough thumbs over your sensitive nipples while you leaned into his touch, eager to get more of it. Humming his lips trailed down from your mouth to your neck, kissing and nipping at it as your hand dove into his thick hair and grasped it tightly as you felt him biting the skin gently but firm enough to let a small sting shoot through your body. “Oh fuck”, it fell softly from your lips, your eyes closing for a moment before you felt one of his hands traveling up to cup your throat, squeezing it lightly as he leaned back and grinned down at you. “Sit and lean back, Baby”, he said lowly, not needing to do much more for you to do as he said as you could already feel your body tingling in anticipation of what was to come while his hand was still wrapped around your throat. Breathing sharply in you leaned back until your leather covered back meet the wood, your fingers running over its roughness while your eyes found Negan’s that were staring narrowed down on you. “This, shit, this is a sight for the gods”, he murmured, licking his lips as the wolfish grin on his lips widened, enjoying the view for a moment longer until his hand ran from your neck down your breasts and your stomach until he started to lower himself to his knees. A shiver ran down your spine as you could feel him grabbing your legs to push them over his shoulders and move his head so close to your middle that you could feel his hot breath ghosting over your flesh. Slowly but surely you could feel Negan’s lips trailing along your inner thighs, his rough beard brushing against them until you could finally feel the warmth of his mouth meeting your middle and a low groan vibrated against your sensitive flesh. A small gasp left your mouth as you felt him dragging his tongue along your core, humming deeply as he tasted you and you could feel the heat within you growing hotter as it pooled in your body’s depth. The sensation of his rough beard and his soft lips and tongue made you wince in pleasure as he worked on you, moving one of his hands towards your hot flesh to send more waves of heat through you. Tipping your head back, you felt his long fingers teasing over your clit, before his thumb moved in firm, circling movements over the sensitive numb, enough to make your body tingle even more. Negan knew what you liked. Hell, Negan knew every little inch of your body and he surely knew how to use that for his advantage. In no time he turned you into a writhing mess as his fingers and tongue worked on you and you found yourself grabbing his hair as your body started to tremble, filled up with heat and pleasure. Softly moaning you met your hips gently in rhythm with his movements until could feel an uneasy sound fall from his lips as his deep voice vibrated against your flesh ,”Fuck, I can’t wait anymore...shit, I’m rock hard.” “Then take me”, it slipped from your lips, your body eager to feel just any touch from him, feel his tongue or his lips, or feel him thrust deeply into you. Negan was quick back on his feet, a wicked look on his face as you whined in response to the loss of his touch, though you got quickly rewarded as you rose your head just enough to see him pulling his clothes from his body. Step by step you could see more of him, his toned body, the dark hair that peppered his chest and the trail that down his pants that got you excited regardless how many times you’d already seen him undress. You could already see the large tent underneath his boxers as he pulled his pants from his body and tossed them to the side, grinning wolfishly before he brushed the very last piece from his body and revealed his throbbing erection. He was as rock hard as he’d said, precum already leaking from the tip as he stroked himself, enough to let the anticipation skyrocket within you. His eyes kept on roaming over your naked figure underneath his leather jacket as he moved in to grab your legs, pushing them up and leaning them against his shoulders as he moved between them, the wicked grin always on his face while your body started to tremble harder. His fingers were digging into your skin as one of his hands ran down to get a grasp of himself and lead himself closer, eliciting a sharp breath to fall from your lips as soon as you felt his tip pushing against your core. “Eyes on me”, you could hear him order lowly, enough to make your glance shoot towards him and just in the very moment your eyes met his, you felt him thrusting himself into you, hard and deep while your face twisted in pleasure. A loud moan fell from your lips as your eyes stayed fixed on Negan, his lips hanging open as he groaned deeply as he grasped both of your legs tightly. “That pussy was made for me, fuck”, he groaned, licking his lips as he started to rock himself into you and his thick brows tensed as his darkened eyes stared down on you as you twitched and writhed on his cock. His fingers were digging deeply into the flesh of your legs, so much that you were sure that he was leaving marks but you couldn’t care less, you just wanted to feel him. Whining in pleasure you could feel Negan pulling himself a little out of your heat only to plow himself right back into you, groaning loudly as his skin smacked against yours and his thick cock filled you up in the very best way possible “Fuck”, it fell from your lips as Negan rocked himself into you, allowing you to meet his harsh but rhythmic movements as your hands were moving to grasp the edges of the table, desperate to hold onto anything as his fast and hard thrusts made the wood shake underneath you. “Fuck, Negan...fuck this feels so good”, you called out, writhing and humming as his heavy thrusts made you shake a little more one after one, only to see how another grin spread over his strained face. “Oh I think I got a little treat for ya”, he growled and pushed himself harder into you, before one of his hands reached down to circle his thumb over the sensitive bundle of nerves, enough to make you throw your head back in pleasure. ”Oh my”, it fell in a gasp from your lips as you felt Negan’s thrusts and the movements of his fingers combining perfectly, bringing the mix of lust and pleasure within you to boil up even more than it already had. ”Good girl”, he growled, as you rocked your hips against his and played into his movements all while you gripped the table’s edges harder, feeling your body heating up even more as Negan’s thrusts got harder and he put more pressure onto your clit, just enough to make your body shake more. You were starting to swing more in a trance, feel each of his touches even more intense than before. Feel his rough grasp on your leg, feel his rough thrusts, feel his fingers skilled movements over your clit and feel his scent and the feeling of the smooth leather of his jacket surround you. “Be my dirty girl and cum on my cock, baby. Cum on my fucking cock!”, Negan called out as you were growing closer to your high, thrust by thrust until he finally send you over the edge and let your orgasm wash over you as he fucked you through it. Heavily breathing you could feel your chest rising and falling quickly as you slowly started to recover, though you stayed stuck in this haze of pleasure as you saw Negan’s eyes looking over you, visibly enjoying seeing you writhe on his cock while your bare body was only surrounded by his leather jacket. The grin on his lips was wide as he finally let go of your clit and instead moved up to wrap his hand around the back of your neck, and pulled your still shaking body up to face him. “C’mere”, he growled, still keeping his movements going as you tried recollect yourself somehow and moved in to wrap your shaking legs around his hips, allowing him to thrust deeper. “Fucking hell”, he cussed out, his body tensing up as he rocked himself harder into you, stretching you out perfectly and hitting all the right spots as you moved your arms to wrap them around his neck, moaning and panting as you tried to meet his movements and give him the very same pleasure he had just given you. Glimpsing with a still hazy look in your eyes down, you watched him dragging himself back and forth into you before you felt his hands moving down to your hips, pushing you harder onto him as he moaned deeply. Taking the chance you leaned in to brush your lips over his neck and nipped on his heated skin, while more curses left his lips one by one. Reaching one of his hands up he grasped your jaw harshly, pulling you to his lips to he met you in a rough kiss that swallowed both of your moans and deep groans as Negan started to grow closer and closer. His thrusts grew harsher but sloppier, your kiss disrupted by his heavy pants that rumbled through his broad chest as his eyes found yours to keep them locked as he rocked himself harder into you. “Holy fuck...”, he groaned, pleasure written all over his face as his movements got faster and you allowed him to use you just the way he wanted right now until you finally felt him twitch deeply inside you. A shivering groan fell from his lips as he pulled himself just fast enough out of you, his body shivering harshly as he spilled himself over your stomach while the shocks of his orgasm rumbled through him. Panting his eyes fell from yours and fixed on his leatherjacket and your body that was covered in his cum, until he exhaustedly leaned against you, his forehead pressing against yours as you leaned in to cup his face and pressed a kiss over his lips. “Happy anniversary, Negan.”

9 days after Maggie’s arrival The afternoon sun fell brightly over Alexandria as you strolled through the infirmary, Negan’s handbook in one hand and a pen and Siddiq’s old notes about the herbs in your other as you headed towards the porch. You’d already started to work on the book a little during yesterday’s evening, but your small break now seemed like a good opportunity to continue with it. Rounding your last corner you peaked outside and saw Judith sitting at the end of the table on the porch, writing something while a couple pens were sprawled out around her. “Hey Jude”, you said with a smile as you moved outside, closing the door behind yourself as you nodded towards her,”Watcha doing?” “Homework...and I’m waiting for Lydia”, she sighed as she looked up from her paper before a small smile grew on her lips as she nodded towards the small lake on the other side of the road,”I like the view here, makes it easier to study.” “Oh that’s true, it’s real pretty here”, you said as you moved closer and nodded towards one of the free chairs diagonally from her,“Mind if I join?” Shaking her head she quickly moved some of the sprawled out pens closer to her to give you a bit more space before you sat down and laid stuff onto the table, just as something on the street caught your gaze. Tension washed over your body from one moment to another as you caught Maggie walking down the street, her son strolling right next to her as they chatted with each other. You tried to dart your glance quickly away from her but before you could her eyes met yours and let a shiver run down your back as the smile on her face turned into a frown within seconds. “What’s this?”, you suddenly heard Judith’s voice say, pulling you from Maggie’s stare as you glanced over at Judith and saw her pointing at the notebook, and though you knew that she was curious, the look in her eyes said more than 1000 words could. She was trying to distract you and you were going to let her. “Gonna be a handbook for all the herbs we use in here”, you said, quickly opening up the book to show her the pages that were filled with the dried herb samples- “Oh that’s nice”, she said, smiling brightly as she pointed at the dried comfrey leaf,”Can I?” Nodding, you watched her lean over and stroke her finger over the texture of the leaf, giggling as she fell back onto her chair, “Wow, that’s so cool.” “Gotta tell Negan that, he dried them”, you said with a chuckle just as her eyes fell on the street and she let out a small laugh. “Speaking of.” Turning your head you saw Negan strolling down the street towards the infirmary, ready to pick you up for your shift later this day while Lydia walked next to him. “Hey ladies”, Negan called out with quick wave and a grin as he reached the porch and nodded to Lydia next to him,”Found out we wanted to head to the same place.” “Hi”, Lydia said with a smile as she moved towards you, sat down across from you and set her book down on the table, smiling softly once more as you greeted her back and saw Negan plopping down on the chair beside her. “Think you could help me with a math problem?”, Judith finally asked as she reached for another slim book of hers and flipped through the pages as she glimpsed at Negan who quickly nodded. “Sure thing, lemme see”, he said, reaching his hand out for the book before Judith’s eyes fell on you as she nodded towards the book. “Or do you wanna?” “Nah I can pass on math”, you chuckled, watching Judith tilt her head a little before her glance bounced in between you and Negan. “But you’re not as long out of school as Negan.” “Hey, that’s not fair, that doesn’t mean shit”, Negan called out in the very next moment, a wide grin growing on his lips as nodded at you,”And she’s outta school for a long ass time too.” “Not as long as you”, Judith quickly countered, and a grin pressed over her lips ,”She’s still young. You’re old.” “Pff I’m not”, Negan defended himself, while another giggle fell from Judith’s lips. “Then why’s your beard so gray?” “Careful Miss Grimes, you’re gettin’ bold”, Negan called playfully out, pointing at her before he snatched the book with a thick laugh and a wide grin on his face from his fingers, just as you heard someone clearing his throat behind you. “Hey”, you heard Steve say as soon as you turned around to him, catching him leaning against the door as he nodded inside,”Can I talk to you for a moment?” Strolling behind Steve into the infirmary you already expected him to ask you for help with the tinctures or salves that he’d been mixing earlier but instead, he stopped by the counters and nodded outside to the porch where Negan and the girls still sat. “How about you take the rest of the day off? Negan too?” “I-”,you started, so surprised of him that you didn’t even really know what to say first, “I would love to but I don’t know if that would make a good impression.” “Day’s pretty, most have laid their work low today”, he said with a shrug, gesturing around the room,”Infirmary is quiet and honestly, Daniel’s working at the woodhouses today so I wouldn’t mind taking over Negan’s shift.” “Really?”, it fell from our lips with the same surprised tone as before, your eyes wide as you started at him and couldn’t quite belief his offer yet. He’d always belonged to the kinder people in Alexandria, those who were willing to give your husband a chance but this was still something big for you. “Really”, he confirmed while the look in his eyes softened a little,”I think you deserve a bit time off too...and I’ll vouch for Negan if anyone questions it.” With that he surprised completely once for all, so much that it had to be written all over your face since Steve let out a small chuckle and shrugged his shoulders. “I may have thought differently about him a couple years ago but...he’s done good”, he said, his hand rubbing over his blonde beard stubble as he glimpsed back at you ,”And Daniel had only good things to say about him. So go have a nice afternoon off with him.” “Thank you”, you breathed out, still staring startled at him as you gulped thickly ,”Really, I-” “All good”, he said with a nod as you found yourself lost at words for a moment before you started to collect yourself again. “If you need a shift covered to have time off with Daniel you’ll let me know too, alright?” “Sure”, he said with a smile, before he nodded outside where you could hear Negan laughing,”See you tomorrow.” Nodding you watched him move back upstairs where he’d been working just as you could feel the happiness his sudden offer had brought into you starting to feel real. Smiling to yourself you moved back over to the door, hearing Negan defending himself loudly. “Now that ain’t true! I make the best damn spaghetti!”, he called out just as you could peek through the door and see him nodding at Lydia and Judith ,”Y’know if you’re allowed, you can come over whenever you guys like and I’ll make ‘em for you. They’re the best!” “Barbara’s are pretty good”, Judith countered back, the grin on her lips pretty telling that she wanted to vex Negan. “Yeah”, you could see Lydia nod, a small grin on her face as well Negan let out a thick groan. “Not as good as mine!”, he defended himself again, though the playful look was still spread over his face as he caught you walking outside and pointed at you,“Tell them!” “He makes the best spaghetti, you should come over and try it”, you chuckled as you leaned yourself against the frame of the door and nodded at him,”I got some other good news too.” Quickly after finishing helping Judith with her math-problem you made your way back home, ecstatic to be able to spend your afternoon off together in your garden and use the beautiful weather outside to the fullest. Quickly, you switched into comfy clothes, got the sandwiches ready and prepared a comfy space outside with some thick blankets and pillows to cushion you from the grassy ground in the garden. Moving through the house you held two glasses of lemonade in your hands, made of an unopened can you’d found in the back of your pantry, the same one Negan had already loved years back. “I got a little surprise”,you said as you strolled down the porch’s stairs, grinning at Negan as he turned around from his spot on the blankets,”Was still unopened in the back of the cupboard.” “No way”, he called out, his eyes lightening up as he looked at the lemonade like a kid looked at their Christmas presents ,”Holy fuck.” Chuckling you handed Negan his glass, that he eagerly took into his hand and gulped the first sip of lemonade down. “God damn”, he called out, sighing contently as he looked down at the ,”This is like slurpin’ fucking sunrays.” Licking his lips he grinned at you as you let yourself fall next to him, sipping on your lemonade as well as Negan gestured to the sandwiches that were sprawled out over the big plate. “And now let’s get into this, I’m hungry as hell, ain’t gonna lie.”

Filled up till the rim you soon found yourself laying next to Negan, cuddled up into his side while you stared at the few clouds that travelled over the bright blue sky. Negan’s head was leaning against yours, his lips brushing against your forehead while his fingers stroke softly up and down your arm and content hums rumbled through his chest. “Fuck, this is all I wanna do tonight, just lay here all sprawled out”, his voice hummed against you as he pressed a soft kiss to your skin and nuzzled his nose into your hair.“ You don’t wanna cross off sex under the stars from your bucket list?”, you teased with a soft chuckle, hearing a small snicker fall from Negan’s lips before you could feel him slightly shaking his head. “Some other night”, he mumbled, pulling you a little closer as another sigh left his lips ,”Just wanna hold you and soak up some of that peacefulness.” “Sounds good”, you mumbled with a smile, moving in to press a kiss against his neck and you cuddled deeper into his warm embrace.

Minute for minute you enjoyed the moments with Negan outside, just relaxing and chatting while you sipped some more lemonade and watched the sun starting to move behind the treeline. The edges of the clouds gleamed brightly in the last light that got reflected onto them while the sun’s last breaths turned the sky into a beautiful mix of warm colors that melted into the blue. Smiling you glimpsed from the sky to the small daisy that you were twirling in between your Fingers, only one of the many that were sprawled out over the lawn. With a chuckle you propped yourself onto your elbow, glancing at Negan who glimpsed from the sky down at you with a curious look on his face. “Watcha doin?”, he chuckled as you leaned in to stick the daisy behind his ear, grinning as you watched his thick brows bounce up in surprise. “Just givin’ you a little makeover”, you chuckled, tilting your head bit to the side as you looked at him with a teasing grin,”Think you should wear daises more often, they really suit you.” “Well, what can I say?”, he snickered, shrugging his shoulders as the smirk on his lips grew a little wider ”I can rock any look.” “For sure”, you laughed, adjusting the flower so it wouldn’t lose its balance before you teased your fingers through his thick hair. “Makes me look really fucking intimidating, huh?”, he grinned, licking his lips as he narrowed his eyes playfully at you,”Shittin’ your pants already?” “Absolutely”, you snickered, nodding as you as Negan let out a thick laugh, the rumbling of his body enough to let the small flower slip from his ear again. “Ah shit”, he grumbled, reaching to the side of his head to grasp the daisy. He glimpsed at it for a second before he reached towards you and tucked the flower onto your ear. “Looks much better on you tho”, he chuckled, grinning softly as he looked over you and you shook your head with small laugh. “Pff I’m not so sure about that”, you snickered as you moved into cuddle up against him again, using his arm as your pillow as you looked back up into the sky. Your eyes roamed over the colors that seemed to flow into one another while the edges of light around the clouds turned from a vibrant, bright orange into a soft, milder one. “You’re such a sucker for sunsets”, you heard Negan chuckle beside you, tease swinging heavily through his voice as you glimpsed from the sky back over at him and let out a playful huff. “How can anyone not be a sucker for them?”, you chuckled as you glimpsed from your husband back up at the sky,”Really, I don’t know how that’s even possible.” Smiling your eyes swayed over the colors again, taking them in one by one, from the almost lavenderlike lilac,, to the soft pink to the warm orange. ”They’re some of the only things you can count on always being beautiful, no matter how awful everything gets. Same thing with those wildflowers”, you mumbled, sighing softly as you cuddled into to the cushions underneath your body, ”I know that sounds cheesy but they’re little reminders that not everything pretty is lost...i just-...I really like that.” You almost waited for Negan to say something, either agree with you or tease you a little more but instead, you could see him looking at you from the corner of your eyes, silently while you’d talked. Moving your head you found his hazel eyes traveling over your face, a loving, warm look stuck within them while a soft smile played around his lips. “Mhm?”, you hummed, almost waiting for him to say something but instead of hearing his voice, you saw him slowly moving in, grasping your face with one of his large hands before his lips met yours in a deep kiss. Sighing into him you kissed him back, feeling his soft lips caressing over yours while his beard stubble scrapped softly against your skin and his thumb stroke gently along your cheek. “Just fuckin’ love listening to you ramble all excited”, Negan finally mumbled as he let slowly go of his lips, though remained close as he gave you a grin,”You know that. I could hear you ramble ‘bout dog shit and I’d still listen.” Your smile mixed with a grin as you glimpsed up at him, still feeling his fingers brushing softly up and down the side of his face as he nodded at you. “So go on”, he grumbled with a grin while another chuckle fell from his lips,”I wanna hear more.” “About the dog shit or what?”, you mumbled back, watching a laugh fall from Negan’s lips as he moved his hand to give your waist a playful pinch. “’Bout the fuckin’ sunsets!” “Well this is not a complain, but you brought me out of my flow”, you mumbled, leaning up to peck his lips softly before you leaned back and watched him wink at you. “You’ll find back into it.”

You did. Somehow at least. You found yourself chatting and laughing with him while the sky turned more and more into a variety of purple and dark, lavish blue, revealing the stars the day had been hiding. Cuddled up underneath one of the blankets and enclosed in Negan’s warmth you were fully happy and peaceful, just happy about the present moment. Not thinking about the past, not worrying about the future.

11 days after Maggie’s arrival A yawn fell from your lips as you moved through the bathroom, massaging some moisturizer into your face’s tried skin as you stumbled through the door into the bedroom and found Negan already laying in bed, reading one of the books he’d taken from the farmhouse. “It’s good?”, you asked as you shut the lights down in the bathroom and closed the door behind yourself, watching as Negan’s glance quickly moved up from the pages. “Hell yeah”, he chuckled, nodding towards the book as he let out a small groan, “I need ya to read it when I’m done. Really, need someone to talk to about the fuckery that’s happening in here.” “Alright, I will”, you chuckled back, strolling over to the bed while Negan kept talking. “I mean the characters in here are awesome but fuck, there’s this one couple that’s just getting on my nuts”, he sighed as you moved in to crawl into the bed and slip underneath the warm sheets to him,”Kinda remind me of Sarah and that douchey guy from that trashy show.” “Chad?”, you asked, watching him snip his fingers as he let out a thick laugh. “Yep!”, he called out, snickering as you moved in to cuddle up into his side and allowed him to wrap his arm around you,”Fuck, it’s always’s a Chad, huh?” “Always”, you chuckled, sinking a little deeper into the cushions of the bed as you nodded towards the book, “You wanna tell me what they’re doing to be so awful?” “Don’t wanna spoiler you”, Negan grumbled, stopping for a moment as if he was pondering before he let out a sigh,”They’re just being annoying fucks all the time, fucking shit up for everyone else.” “Yeah, sounds a lot like Sarah and Chad”, you mumbled back, chuckling softly as you leaned in to nuzzle your head against his bare shoulder. “Done with the book for today?”, Negan asked, nodding towards the handbook that laid on your nightstand while you slowly nodded. “Yeah”, you mumbled, glimpsing at the book for a moment before you cuddled closer again,”Too sleepy to do more, don’t wanna write mistakes in there or mess it up with some sleepy messy handwriting.” A hum left Negan’s lips as he reached for his bookmark and slipped it between the open pages, shutting it before he laid it back onto his nightstand. “You don’t have to stop for me”, you mumbled, nuzzling your nose into his skin before you felt Negan moving over the mattress. “Mhm but I want to”, he mumbled, turning himself so he could roll onto his side, pull you closer against him and meet your lips in a slow kiss. Smiling against his lips you huddled up closer, running your hand up his chest until you could toy softly with his chesthair and hear a deep hum rumble up his throat. Sighing he slowly started to let go of you, moving his hand in to tease his thumb over your jaw while his eyes ran over your face. For a few moments it was quiet and you just found yourself glancing at him, your eyes running over his handsome face, those puppy eyes and the salt and pepper beard that was just slightly longer than usual before he thickly gulped. “How long do you think this all will go well?”, he finally spoke out, his voice heavy as he bit his lip. “Each time I only see her from afar I feel like she’s more tense...no matter how much she tries to ignore me ”, he added, sighing heavily as he shook his head slightly,”Like some fucking vulcano that’s gonna break out at some point.” “I don’t know”, you finally whispered truthfully, swallowing heavily as you tried to find no let any of your fears get the best of you,”I just know that we’ll deal with it...like we’ve done with everything else” Your voice was quiet but hopeful as you glanced up at him, your fingers moving from his chest to his face as you softly ran your fingertips through his beard, just in the very same way that usually made him relax “And Carol still has to hold up her end of the bargain, she told me she would. She’s been in and out of Alexandria for the last couple days but if I see her next time, I’ll make sure to remind her of what she said to me”, you said, stopping your soft movements for a moment as you made sure to keep his eyes looked onto yours. “We’ll find a way”, you mumbled, before a small sigh slipped from your lips as you cuddled closer into his embrace,”I don’t know how yet but we will, this is our home and I wanna build our future here...I’m not giving up on that.”

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coping-via-clint-eastwood · 3 years

Text

CSI Characters as Ancient/Medieval Fantasy Warriors (title is tentative)

I WROTE THIS ALL IN ONE SITTING!!!!! CAN YOU BELIEVE IT???????

*ahem* This is speculation about what powers and skills the CSI characters would have if they were warriors in an ancient/medieval fantasy setting, amongst other things. This was probably inspired by my recent wallowing in medieval fantasy (specifically Songs of War {if you don't know what that is, it's okay}), and I thought, why not entertain the idea? And after writing it out, I can say that it was fun toying around with it. If this inspires anybody to add on anything, or write fanfiction, or whatever, by all means go ahead.

@addictedtostorytelling @bartramcat @buildinggsr @davesdude80 @dobbyofearth @fandomismymiddlename @originalpinkranger @panchostokes @space-helen @stokes-theorem

All the people written about here are humans with powers.

Gil: He has enhanced eyesight, and is a sniper archer. If I may draw your attention to the ending scene of season 4 episode 2, All for Our Country:

Bonus shot because it reminds me of his Will Graham days:

He is canonically a deadeye. So, I am extending that to be a superhuman power. I'll put it this way: he can aim and shoot at the same target a contemporary sniper with a scope could; he does not require (or have, for that matter) a scope. Because he is not so able as his younger teammates, so he cannot be in the direct area of battle and fend off opponents. But he has excellent eyesight, so he hides up in a tree or on the edge of a cliff that overlooks the area or wherever is applicable, and shoots any targets he can. He uses a crossbow, since not as much strength is needed to pull back the cord as compared to a bow. He also has a light wooden staff which he uses to help him walk up inclinations. It's also his defensive staff; if an enemy manages to sneak up on him, he can point the staff at them and shoot a forcefield that will blast them back. But this is only effective at close range, hence why he has to use the crossbow for opponents further away. He wears a hooded cloak which is green on one side and a dusty brown on the other, so that he can camouflage himself, turning the cloak to whichever side he needs to match his surroundings. He is not the only one to wear a cloak however; Catherine, Ecklie, Jim, DB and Finn wear cloaks (more details when I get to each) as well to show they are of higher ranking, but only Gil's is hooded for practical purposes.

Warrick: His power is that he can jump really high. He can jump over a small hill and land on the ground on the other side. He's the one who helps get Gil to his perches if needed; he puts him over his shoulder and jumps, holding him with one arm and his war hammer in his other hand. He is strong enough to carry Gil. And Gil trusts him and is comfortable enough to let himself be borne in such a way, never struggling or crying out in fear when he is suddenly brought off the ground at such a high rate. In tandem with being able to jump high, he can strike his hammer on the ground when he lands and cause a quake. His hammer's enchantment depends on how high he jumped. On the ground, he swings his hammer at an opponent and sends them flying back (at a much greater distance than Gil's forcefield).

Bobby Dawson: He's the archer who is in the direct area of battle. He uses a small hunting bow, and also has a gladius in case any opponents manage to get close to him. He has enhanced reflexes, so he is able to turn around, draw weapons, and load and shoot his bow faster than normal.

Catherine: She is telekinetic. She does not use weapons because she prefers to have her hands free to gesticulate and help her focus on moving the objects she is controlling. Her cloak is a beautiful royal blue.

Heather: Mind control + reading minds + telepathy. And invisibility. Aside from turning the team's opponents against each other, mind control is useful for helping friends escape from dangerous situations; sometimes, it's easier than telling them what to do. She needs very strong concentration for her mind control, which is the ability she uses the most, so she makes herself invisible and keeps out of the way, but stays where she can see the person she is manipulating. Like Gil, she has the defensive staff in case anyone finds her.

Nick and Sara: They are what I like to call the speedster twins. It is very satisfying to wash them nyoom about and quickly kill any opponent in the path of their run. Typically, they start out standing next to each other at the same point, and then run on one side of the battlefield each. So they take out the opponents on the skirting of the battlefield. Sara has a cutlass while Nick has twin daggers.

Greg: He can talk to nearby spirits and ask them to help his team in the fight. With the power of this necklace that he has, he can conjure a protective invisible dome-shaped barrier around himself, which is invulnerable to any and every form of attack. Except if somebody were to dig their way up from below him of course. However, he has to stay in the same spot when he is inside this barrier, and has to deactivate it if he wants to walk (or run or whatever) somewhere else. The spirit of the person who gave him the necklace follows him everywhere, and stays by his side on the battlefield to protect him from any opponents who manage to get close. Greg has a curved cleaver in case he needs to fight.

Al: Aside from being a healer, he can freeze time. Sort of. He can freeze the movement of anybody who is coming at him, no matter how many there are. He does not wield weapons. He has wooden legs (which are enchanted to be completely painless for him) and a staff, but without the power that Gil's and Heather's have. To heal someone, he just has to touch them, for as long as it takes for the wounds to completely heal. **I was thinking about making him have something to do with necromancy, but I thought that that's too much like Greg's power.

David: He is the other healer, and is the one who kills the people that Al freezes. He just makes them fade out of existence. It is completely painless, and that way they don't have any bodies lying around the healers' area. Also, while Al heals physical injuries, David actually cures illnesses. So he has to touch his patient for as long as it takes to eradicate the infection.

The two healers typically stay in one spot, ready to head out into the battlefield if any of their teammates are injured.

Archie: He is the cryokinetic guardian of Henry, Wendy, Mandy, and Hodges, who are not combatants. He does not use weapons.

Henry: He is a blacksmith, in charge of repairing the people's weapons, and making new ones if necessary. He also makes the arrows for Gil and Bobby.

Wendy: She is an enchanter who imbues weapons with offensive powers, such as the quake and blast effect on Warrick's hammer, or the enhanced sharpness of the speedster twins' blades.

Mandy: She enchants weapons with defensive powers, such as Greg's necklace, or Gil's and Heather's staves. She is also the one who made Al's wooden legs painless.

Hodges: While Al and David are physical healers, and while Wendy enchants weapons, Hodges is the one who restores the powers of other people. He is not really drained when he does it, but it is better for him to stay still and rest while other people fight. It works exactly how Al's and David's healing does.

These five people typically stay near the healers.

Jim: He can control the weather. That also means he can summon lightning. And hailstones. And rain (creatures that are made of fire or lava are susceptible to rain). Like Catherine, he has his hands free to focus whatever he's bringing down from the sky onto wherever his target is. His cloak is pitch black in colour.

Conrad: He can clone himself; up to five clones of himself can exist at a time. It's alright if they are hurt or killed; so long as he is still alive. He wields a scythe. His cloak is a really dark grey, almost black, but not really.

Morgan: She can fly. This is not a power which requires restoration. Since she does not use wings, she can fly in rain. She uses twin swords.

Sofia: She is a shapeshifter. But she can not only turn into other creatures; she can turn into objects like a boulder or something. In such forms, she is invulnerable to like, say, a fist striking her, but if someone were to try and blow her up, she would have to turn into something else and run away. You know those fire creatures I mentioned? If she turns into one of them, she can harness their powers. Basically, she takes on the abilities of anything she turns into.

Riley: She can turn into any of her opponents, whether she has killed them herself of if they are standing right in front of her. Heather would be aware that this in fact Riley (telepathy yo), and Riley will work together with the person Heather is controlling. Unlike Sofia, while she becomes the mirror image of someone, she cannot have the skill level of the person she turns into. She herself is proficient with a club; if she turns into someone who was a swordsman, she would be wield a blade as well as them, and will continue to use her own weapon. If she turns into one of those fire creatures, she might be able to use their fire, but she doesn't have as fluent control over it as the original person. In fact, it is much safer for her to not turn into such creatures.

Ray: He has enhanced strength, which enables him to rotate his huge double-headed battle axe about his wrist above his head. And by "huge", I mean that the stick is almost as long as him, and the blades are bigger than his head. The stick is also quite thick; it has to withstand the weight of the blades, and the impact with which it is struck. By "rotate", I mean Ray is able to hold the handle at the very base, and pivot it perfectly around.

DB: Teleportation. This son of a bitch randomly popping up out of nowhere? Yeah. His weapon is a really small but especially sharp dagger, easy to conceal, and a quick and effective killer. He appears, quickly pokes his opponent, and then teleports to the next one. He can teleport anywhere within his viewing distance; he has to be able to see where he is teleporting to to go there. His cloak is silver in colour.

Finn: She is pyrokinetic. Her cloak is typically orange, yellow or red, but it can change colours to whatever fire she is wielding, which includes green, blue, purple, white, and even black fire. She does not use weapons.

Additional idea: Gil and Sara are soulmates. But they were not fated from birth; rather, their soulmate bond formed when their connection deepened. Before they met, their soulmates could have been anyone else, or they could have gone without a soulmate for the rest of their lives. Even when they met and fell in love at first sight (I'm one of those who hc that they did; ymmv), they were not yet soulmates. It was when they really got to know and understand each other implicitly and became unbreakably steadfast in their connection, of their own accord, that their soulmate bond formed. The physical manifestation of it was when their soul marks appeared; Gil has a butterfly on the right side of his neck, close to the back of his neck, and Sara has a rhinoceros beetle on the underside of her left wrist. Being soulmates, they can heal each other and restore each other's powers. The most soothing times for them to do it is when they can lie down somewhere private and hold each other close.

When their marks first appeared, everyone kept congratulating them; there was a lot of friendly teasing from Warrick, Nick, Greg and Hodges. As for themselves, they remained passive until they were in the privacy of their bedroom. They sat down on the edge of the bed, embracing and leaning their foreheads on each other's, uncontainable smiles on their faces as they had a little heart-to-heart. They did not really have to vocalise much; they had always been able to understand each other with just a few words. Then, they leant back from each other, but remained close. Sara lowered her head and slowly, reverently kissed all over Gil's mark; he closed his eyes and let her do it, enjoying how it felt, moving his head to one side so that his skin on the right of his neck was stretched flat and easier to kiss. When Sara was done, they leant back again. Gil lifted Sara's wrist to his mouth and kissed all over her mark, with as much care and adoration as she had done his.

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jamie-leah · 3 years

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War of Wolves (20)

Season 1

Episode 20- The End Is Nigh

Bucky x Reader

Summary: You have been on the streets for the past two years, ever since your accident that left you with the ability to tell if someone is lying. You work as an informant for the white wolf and his mob but you had never met him…until you overhear a phone call that leads you to saving his life. Now he wants you to work for him. Its an offer you couldn’t refuse…right?

Word Count: 2425

Warnings: Violence, outbursts, mention of weight, vomiting, kidnapping, injuries, hallucinations, swearing

A/N: Okay all you Lovely people, I am hitting you with another episode thick and fast. I love you all for your support and encouragement! Enjoy this one! And come tell me if you would like to see another season of WoW? Because I have a few ideas...

<---Previous Episode Next Episode--->

WoW Masterlist Series Masterlist Oneshot Masterlist

A week later

YOUR POV

You weren’t sure how much time had passed. It felt like a lifetime of Isaac drugging you up, poking and prodding and taking samples.

You had been in and out of consciousness like a yoyo. Your body getting weaker every day. Isaac barely fed you saying some bullshit about experimenting how the stress affected the way your ability grew.

Any food that you did manage to eat it was another story trying to keep it down. You often found yourself dreaming or imagining conversations as if Bucky was here.

You were currently imagining being back at that restaurant with the aquarium as a wall having a meal. You were laughing at him tipping sauce down his suit when the scraping of your cell door cuts through it.

You keep your eyes closed trying to hold onto the dream as Bucky says, “looks like our dinner is about to be rudely interrupted Doll”.

You wave him off, “let him carry me, as long as I get to keep my eyes closed and see you it won’t be interrupted”.

Bucky raises an eyebrow, “and have you stop fighting against them? Come on Doll, you know I’ll be here when you get back”.

The blonde man cuts through the dream, “move”.

You open your eyes suddenly feeling the cold in your bones, “make me you curly headed fuck”.

You knew what was coming, yet you still couldn’t bring yourself to move or stop fighting him all the way to Isaac.

BUCKY’S POV

Night had fallen hours ago but Bucky stayed sitting in his office. He watched the footage again and again of you being shoved into the car and being whisked away from him. He hadn’t slept and only ate and drank out of necessity.

Sam was in the room talking on the phone trying to get information out of more informants when Steve walks into the room.

Bucky rewinds the footage again as Steve approaches, “you need to get some sleep Buck”.

Bucky ignores him, watching the footage again hoping to spot something he missed. Steve waits a few seconds before closing the lid of the laptop.

Bucky stares at where the screen was, the image of you burned into his eyes, for a few seconds. Bucky stares until he shoots up from his chair and sweeps the contents of his desk onto the floor.

“And what the fuck is sleeping gonna do Steve? Nothing! She’s out there now, on her own! Its been a fucking week and we still have nothing!”, Bucky’s chest is heaving, the strain of keeping his emotions in check showing.

Steve speaks normally, not matching Bucky’s raised voice, “and what good is staring at the footage doing? Also, nothing”.

Bucky shakes his head, “I’m not sleeping while she’s still out there going through only the devil knows what”.

Steve sighs, “you need sleep Buck, to think clearly…you know if she were hear now, she’d be saying the same thing”.

Bucky bursts again, “but she’s not Steve! She’s not here”.

Bucky doesn’t wait for empty words from Steve or Sam. Instead he strides from the room and towards the back doors.

He keeps walking until he reaches the door and pulls it open. Winter starts to get up to greet him but Bucky orders him to stay.

Bucky goes over and sits next to him just like you would. Winter sits up facing him as Bucky strokes him. After a few moments Winter whines and Bucky nods, “I miss her too boy”.

Bucky shakes his head, “its my fault she’s gone, I should have done more…she’d probably slap me for even thinking that”.

Bucky smiles at the thought of you being cross with him before saying to Winter, “Steve’s right, isn’t he? She’d tell me to sleep if she were here now”.

Bucky pats his lap and Winter settles next to him laying his head on his leg. Bucky lays his head back and closes his eyes, images of you haunting his dreams.

YOUR POV

You think about two days had passed since Isaac had sent for you. On the one hand you were grateful for the rest, but it was freezing. The only warmth you felt was in that shitty room.

You were in the corner dry heaving for the hundredth time that day. Your body was shaking violently from the cold and strain your body was going through.

Your dreams had spilled out into reality as you now conjured the image of Bucky while you were awake. He was still wearing his black suit leaning against the wall, “that’s the third time today. You need to start keeping your food down if you want to get out of here”.

You spit into the bucket, “you think I don’t know that? It’s the fucking drugs”.

You put the bucket down and go to stand but you fall instead. Bucky goes to help but stops himself, you both know he’s not real and he can’t help.

You finally manage to make it back to the bed before saying to Bucky, “you can’t find me, can you?”.

Bucky pushes off the wall, “you know I’m trying”.

You nod slightly, “I know that. I just don’t know how much longer I can live like this”.

Bucky looks alarmed, “you can’t stop fighting”.

You close your eyes, “but I’m tired Buck”.

Bucky scoffs, “you know there’s things you could be doing to help me find you”.

Your eyes snap open in anger, “yeah? Like what? In case you hadn’t noticed I’m locked in a cell”.

Bucky shrugs, “you know the more people that know you’re here the more likely it is that I can find you. Everyone has a price for information and everyone knows I’d pay anything”.

You lift your head up to look at him. He looks exactly like your Bucky but there’s something off and you’re well aware that he’s not real and none of this is healthy.

You stare at him a little longer and you realise what’s off, it’s the eyes. His eyes aren’t the same colour blue as your Bucky, “did you have something in mind?”.

You waited another day before the blonde guy came to get you again. You had gathered your strength for what you had planned.

It was the same story of the door scrapping open and his voice seconds later, “move”.

You don’t even waste energy on a reply. You just count his steps so that you can time it all perfectly. When you know he’s a step away from pulling you off the bed you twist from your foetal position and smack him in the face.

You know he’ll only be shocked for a second, so you get up and knee him in the balls to keep him down longer. You hear him grunt before falling to one knee.

You don’t wait to see if he recovers, you run. You ignore the shaking in your legs and the way your feet thud against the stone.

You run as fast as your heart would allow down the narrow corridor and passed the door that leads to Isaac. That’s when you hear the guy shout for you to stop and you nearly laugh at the absurdity of it.

You near the end of the corridor and take a sharp left down another corridor. Its just as narrow but you see a set of double doors at the end of it, the only double doors you’ve ever seen in these corridors.

Your body is screaming at the exertion, but you keep going, the image of Bucky popping up by the doors pointing to them.

You feel like you’ve been running for hours but you don’t stop as you approach the doors. You brace for the impact as your body slams into the wooden doors.

They give way followed by a loud crash of metal hitting a wooden floor. You fall and realise that a knight uniform was in front of the doors to make it look like they weren’t useable doors.

You look behind you and see the blonde guy halfway down the hall and gaining fast. You look forward and see some stunned men and maids.

You scramble to your feet and step over the metal, realising you’re in the foyer and the front doors are right there.

Hope blossoms in your chest at actually having a chance of getting out of here as you sprint towards the doors.

Bucky is standing by them and you smile at him. You skid to a halt to open the door. Your shaking hands taking a few seconds to turn the door knob. Valuable seconds.

Just as you push the door open arms grab you around the waist. You scream and struggle as hard as you can as you watch the door swing open.

Sunlight floods the entryway and hits your skin, the only real warmth you’ve felt in what feels like eternity. Bucky stands passed the threshold looking at you as you get dragged back through the double doors.

The sunlight gives an aura around him that makes him look like an angel and as you lose sight of Bucky, the door and hope, you can’t help but call out his name.

BUCKY’S POV

Bucky was in the office with Sam, Steve and Darren. Darren had come over to say that he hadn’t found anything out but wanted to help any way he could.

They had been talking for the past hour about what else they could do. Bucky could barely concentrate on what was being said as he looked out the window thinking of you.

“I know we looked into Harry, but he could be worth checking again. He may have estates we don’t know about”, that was Steve.

Bucky heard Sam next, “but if we don’t know about them how are we meant to find out?”.

Steve again, “I don’t know, but Harry’s organisation isn’t big, he wouldn’t have anything outside of the UK”.

Darren this time, “but the UK is still a big place if we don’t know where we’re looking”.

A few seconds of silence and then a buzzing. Bucky was trying to ignore it as he thought about you. He was quite successful in ignoring it until one of his spare phones gets shoved into his face by Steve, “Bucky! You’ve got a call”.

Bucky quickly snatches it from Steve and gets up from the chair before answering, “hello?”.

A whispered voice comes out, “Bucky is that you? Its me, Noah”.

Bucky nods as if he can see, “yeah, its me. Tell me you got something Noah”.

Noah continues to whisper, “she’s here”.

It was only two words, but it was enough to leave him feel like he had been suckered punched, “you saw her? Where are you exactly?”.

Bucky turns to see everyone standing now, “yeah I saw her. He was keeping her in a place I didn’t even know existed. After this conversation I’ll text you the exact location”.

Bucky had too many questions he wanted to ask, “how did you find out where she was?”.

Noah was silent for a few seconds before whispering, “she made a break for it. I was just about to leave when she came crashing through a set of doors and ran to the front door. Someone got her before she could make it passed the door and took her down corridors I never even knew existed…you know I couldn’t help her as much as I-“.

Bucky cuts him off, “I know. You did the right thing…how was she?”.

Noah was silent, and Bucky clenched his jaw, “just tell me Noah”.

Noah sighs, “she didn’t look great. She was skinny and had bruises, was wearing a hospital gown. She screamed your name before they took her away”.

Bucky closed his eyes, he didn’t know why he was asking he was only torturing himself. Bucky managed to speak, “thanks Noah. Send over the details and be prepared for contact from me soon”.

They both hang up after that and Bucky relays everything Noah had just told him as he texts through the details. Bucky finishes with, “so let’s go. I’m not waiting any longer”.

Steve blocks his path, “hold on Buck. You and I both know that we need to plan this properly. We can’t fuck this up”.

Sam nods, “Steve is right, but we can plan as we make our way over. If we do both at the same time, then we don’t waste as much time”.

Darren also chips in, “I’m coming too”.

Bucky looks at all of them before nodding, “lets get everything in place then”.

YOUR POV

Isaac was furious with you and you took great satisfaction in it. Not even him slapping you across the face could wipe the smile you gave him as you said, “you can’t break me”.

He ordered the blonde guy to take you back to the cell and you fought with what little energy you had left.

You were now on the bed trying to sleep, but it just wouldn’t come. You open your eyes to see Bucky leaning against the far wall again smiling, “you did great. I’m thinking we could do that again and even get out this time”.

You scoff, “you think I’ll be able to do that again? You’re delusional”.

Bucky laughs, “actually I think you’re the delusional one. I’m thinking if you get the keys off blondie and lock him in next time you’ll be able to do it-“.

“Shut up”, you murmur.

He ignores you, “you may have to wait a day or two because he’ll be jumpy-“.

“Shut up”, you try again.

He still talks, “come on Y/N! We can’t give up now, we’re so close-“.

You lose it as you shoot up from the bed, the anger giving temporary life to your bones, “shut up! Shut up! Shut up! I hate you!”.

You stand there, chest heaving, as Bucky looks hurt, “I thought you loved me?”.

You huff in frustration, “you? No. Bucky? Yes. You’re not him, you’re not even real! I imagined you as a way to make myself feel better but all you’re doing is making me feel worse. You’re just a reminder that Bucky, MY Bucky, is out there and I can’t touch him or see him…I need my Bucky, not whatever you are. So just go away”.

You sink back down on the bed and turn your back on him, your heart breaking in the silence of the cold room.

WoW Taglist: @a-really-bi-girl @crazyblonde124 @summerwelsh @scuzmunkie @loving-life-my-way @pequenaguaxinim @paranoid-borderline-insane @lilsonbucky @somanyfandomsblog @broco8 @inquisitor-selvala @mad-red @k-n-e @rinkashirikitateku @duhh-danielly @boundtomyfate @kalesrebellion @booktease21 @whatinthyworld @flyingbabyunicornnamedangel @asapkyndall @yaszx @amoredashley @aveatquevale- @putinovertime @melimelbean @valsworldofcreativity @lokilokilokilokilokilokilo-blog1 @vesper852 @littlenerdgirl16 @wiccanmetallicrose

#bucky barnes #bucky x reader #bucky #bucky fanfic #bucky x you #bucky fandom #bucky series #bucky fic #bucky x y/n #james buchanan barnes #mob!bucky

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teamfreewill2pointo · 3 years

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Sam’s Emotional Arc 1/3

I hated the finale immediately, but I’ve spent some time with it and talked to friends who loved it. I can see now what it was about, and I’ve come to appreciate the story they were trying to tell, even if I think it didn’t land right.

I’ve been told that my meta on this has helped other people come to terms with the finale, so I thought I’d compile it in one place from across various discord channels and twitter posts. If you are struggling with the finale, I hope it helps you.

Part of this actually started with a shit post. I was making a joke about Sam being psychic since he was scared of clowns when Dean died by one. I realized that may have been deliberate. I dug into the story more and now I’m convinced it was. Then I came across some excellent meta that fit with the themes I was finding and opened up the series even more for me.

Happiness isn’t in the having, it’s in just being. It’s in just saying it.

Cas said it. Dean accepted it. Sam lived it. First, Sam’s journey.

Clowns pop up in s15 before the barn scene. In 15.01, which was written by Dabb, Sam is injured by a clown. Castiel is able to save Sam and heal his injury. The clown keeps coming after Sam, with Sam having fight scenes with the clown, while others attack the other ghosts. The clown is kicking the shit out of Sam again, and Castiel saves him once more. Sam is unable to fight off the clown on his own both times.

They run until they are able to escape outside a magical barrier. Sam turns to the clown and says, “shut up”.

This is literally Sam running from his fears. On top of that, this isn’t just any clown, but the ghost of John Wayne Gacy, from an episode also written by Dabb.

Dean: A serial killer clown. I mean, this is, like, the best/worst thing that’s ever happened to you, you know, ‘cause you love serial killers, but – but you hate clowns.

Sam gets nervous and struggles with the lighter before he’s able to get rid of the clown, for now.

I believe this is a metaphor for hunting in general: it’s both the best of Sam’s life and also the worst. The clowns symbolize his relationship with Dean.

Plucky Pennywhistle's Magical Menagerie was co-written by Dabb (see the pattern?). Sam’s fear of clowns was known since season 2. In season 7, Dabb explored where this fear came from.

On the surface, Sam’s fear is just because he found them creepy, but the episode explains that they actually come from Sam’s fear of being left behind by Dean.

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This episode comes directly after an episode where Sam worried that Dean would get himself killed

Sam: Look... Dean, the thing is, tonight... It almost got you killed. Now, I don't care how you deal. I really, really don't. But just don't – don't get killed. Dean: I'll do what I can. Sam: Well, what's that supposed to mean? Dean: It means I'll do what I can. All right? You can shut up about it.

Sam is dealing with Hallucifer at this moment, but Hallucifer doesn’t really scare him. Losing Dean does.

Sam has a conversation with an employee about greatest fears.

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Recognize the actress? She came back for s15 in 15.06. I don’t believe this was a coincidence. 15.06 featured Castiel helping a parent find their lost child in a season that features Castiel worried about losing Jack. Through his experience with her, Castiel confronts his fears and doubts and then returns to join in the fight against God. [I’ll touch on Castiel’s journey more in his chapter]

Sam’s greatest fear is losing Dean. There’s a lot in the series about how Sam felt lonely and abandoned for much of his childhood. A whole episode, Just My Imagination, centers around this. Sam hated when Dean went off on hunts without him.

source In The Chitters, Sam tells Dean how his fear of losing his family paralyzed him as child. It’s a story where an older brother dies and the younger brother never recovers from it until he’s able to lay him to rest (sound familiar???)

Sam: You know, whenever you and Dad used to leave me to go hunting, and I-and I wouldn’t hear from y’all for a while, I, um, I was always sure that some vamp or rugaru, or take your pick, I always figured one of them finally got ya. I tried to think what to do, you know, the next step to take. I was just lost. Dean: We came back, though, every time.

You might naturally think, “Wait a minute! Sam left Dean multiple times!” Honestly, this was something I had a huge issue with when watching through the show the first time. I didn’t understand Sam and hated him leaving Dean in s8. I was completely on Dean’s side at first. But, on multiple rewatches and talking to others, I’ve realized that when Sam left Dean, he was running from his fear. In this TV Guide interview, Jared perfectly sums up why Sam left in season 1; he couldn’t stand to see his family die. Dabb wrote Dark Side of the Moon along with a comic that explains why Sam left in detail. While the comic isn’t official canon, it shows Dabb’s thought process. In it, Sam sees his family as running towards a horrible end and can’t handle dealing with that.

Dean: So what are you gonna do? You're just gonna live some normal, apple pie life? Is that it? Sam: No. Not normal. Safe.

There are many more points in the series where we learn about Sam’s fear of Dean dying. This would be 3948573945 pages long if I wrote them all out, so I’m going to focus on the key moments that loop back to this ending, but there’s so much more there.

If you are struggling with this and need more, please let me know and I can do a deeper dive into that subject. We first see Sam’s inability to let Dean go in season 1 when Sam refuses to let Dean die in Faith.

Dean: You're not gonna let me die in peace, are you? Sam: I'm not gonna let you die, period. We're going.

Sam’s whole arc in s3 is him being unable to handle Dean dying. He wants to save Dean, but Dean won’t let himself be saved. This was what Gabriel was trying to teach him in Mystery Spot.

Trickster: This obsession to save Dean? The way you two keep sacrificing yourselves for each other? Nothing good comes out of it. Just blood and pain. Dean's your weakness. And the bad guys know it, too. It's gonna be the death of you, Sam. Sometimes you just gotta let people go.

This is how Ruby gets under Sam’s skin and what gets him to start working with her. Everything Sam did was to save Dean. In s4, Sam’s arc is about him sacrificing himself in order to save Dean. He’s gutted from being unable to save Dean. In 4.12, Sam decides to drink demon blood in order to save Dean

Dean: [says that they will die early] Sam: Maybe we'll be different, Dean. Dean: What kind of Kool-Aid you drinking, man? Sammy, it ends bloody or sad. That's just the life. Sam: What if we could win?Dean: "Win"?Sam: If there was a way we could just...put an end to all of it.

When Sam breaks out of the panic room, he’s suicidal. He’s determined to save Dean with his life as the cost he’s willing to pay. He didn’t think he would survive killing Lilith. He was committing suicide in that moment. The reason why Sam is so willing to sacrifice himself in s5 is because he has low self esteem. He blames himself for everything that goes wrong. In Sam, Interrupted 5.11, also by Dabb, Sam has a breakdown under the weight of his guilt. He hates himself and he feels his rage is out of control. In season 6, we see soulless Sam and, unlike souled Sam, he has no rage. Yes, he’ll kill when necessary, but he’s not angry. It was Sam’s fear driving his rage. He felt out of control of his life and let it lead him down a dark path. In season 7, he sees Dean heading down a dark path and he feels helpless to stop it. He worries about dragging Dean down and tells Dean to let him go. But, at the same time, he’s developing coping techniques. He’s starting to face his fears.

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And then Dean disappears and Sam completely falls apart. Sam didn’t have a healthy relationship with Amelia. They were two broken people clinging to each other. Sam and Dean struggle to reconnect after their time apart. There’s a lot of text addressing the horror of a partner dying and people trying to escape from it.

Mrs Holmes: He could see the end of my days were at hand, and... He had lived centuries all alone, but I don't think he could bear the thought of life without me. That's why he drove off that bridge. You must think I'm a monster.

In Hunteri Heroica written by GUESS WHO!?!? Sam finally acknowledges that he was living in a dream world with Amelia. He was running from his past. We see a flash back with Sam pressing on his scar, which he did to help himself distinguish fantasy from reality.

The episode is about a man refusing to engage in reality and harming those around him. Sam has a big confrontation with him

Sam: Look, it can be nice living in a dream world. It can be great. I know that. And you can hide, and you can pretend... all the crap out there doesn't exist, but you can't do it forever because... eventually, whatever it is you're running from – it'll find you. [CASTIEL appears to be taking Sam’s words to heart.] It'll come along, and it'll punch you in the gut. And then... then you got to wake up, because if you don't, then trying to keep that dream alive will destroy you! It'll destroy everything!

Likewise, when Sam was with Jessica, he wasn’t honest about himself. He was hiding from his family and his past. Running to avoid pain. Sam is avoidant in general. Not just in his relationship with Dean. When he talks with Rowena in 13.12 Various & Sundry Villains about his fears of Lucifer, he admits that he could talk about it with Dean, but he can’t bring himself to.

Sam: I’ve seen it too. What he really looks like behind – behind whatever vessel. It… Yeah, still keeps me up at night. Rowena: How do you deal with it? Sam: I guess I don’t deal with it. Not really. I mean, I pushed it down and, um, the world kept almost ending, so I keep pushing it down, and I don’t know. [stammering] I really don’t talk about it, not even with Dean. I mean, I could. You know, he’d listen, but… That’s not something I really know how to share.

In 15.20, Sam’s past is front and center. Literally. I know a lot of people found the Winchester family portrait odd and upsetting, but it symbolizes something I’ll get to in a bit. Instead of trying to avoid his grief, Sam has moments where he lets it wash over him. He goes and sits in the car. He’s no longer avoidant. He’s no longer running away. He’s letting his grief move through him. He’s literally sitting with it.

Soulless Puppy pointed out that the characters emotional arcs is similar to DBT. Please look through their awesome meta here.

Personally, I see them as similar to the therapy I do called ACT. Both are forms of therapy where instead of fighting against them, you accept painful emotions and allow yourself to feel them. If you don’t do that work, then you can’t stop feeling them and your fears/ghosts will always haunt you. In Swan Song, Chuck tells us that “Dean didn't want Cas to save him. Every part of him, every fiber he's got, wants to die, or find a way to bring Sam back. But he isn't gonna do either. Because he made a promise.” In 15.20, Sam initially didn’t want to let Dean go. He’s been refusing to do this since season 1. When he’s separated from Dean he lives a fake life or destroys himself/the world trying to get Dean back. There’s a moment in 15.20 where Sam looks at Dean’s guns. He wants to commit suicide, but he makes the choice to live. For the time in Sam’s life, he let Dean go and lived with his pain. He no longer ran from it. After Swan Song, Dean was unable to let Sam go. He wanted him back. After Carry On, Sam is able to do what Dean couldn’t do. He lives a life outside of Dean. What’s more, Sam has reconciled himself with his past and his family. It’s clumsy and I wish it were better shown, but having the family portrait and their parents in heaven isn’t meant to excuse the way Sam and Dean were raised. In order to move past the trauma of his relationship with his parents, Sam fully integrates them into his life. In Lebanon, Sam was able to confront and forgive his father. In doing so, he can also forgive himself. Mary asks for forgiveness too, and he grants it to her. He doesn’t forget what happened, but he’s able to move forward and leave the intergenerational cycle of violence. He’s able to raise his son, Dean, the way his brother should have been raised.

Happiness isn’t in the having, it’s in just being. It’s in just saying it.

Cas said it. Dean accepted it. Sam lived it.

I can see why people see Sam’s life after Dean as unhappy. I hated it so much because I saw it as horrible and sad the first time through. I had to sit with myself and my emotions first. I think it’s because we’ve been told by society that we have to get rid of our grief in order to be happy. The finale was showing us that it’s possible to do the opposite. [Personally I think it would’ve been better had they showed more overtly happy memories, but many of my friends saw this straight away] When I began therapy, one of the first things I learned was that there aren’t “negative” emotions. When working with our kids, we call them Big emotions. In DBT/ACT, all emotions are treated as normal and natural. Grief, anger, sadness, etc, these are all normal parts of the human existence. We don’t need to run from them in order to have happiness. We can live with them. As interstitial said in our chats, “you can't change the past, you can only change your relationship to it. To accept that your past contained both love and heartache, to miss it, but also know you can do better; that's actual recovery, as good as it gets.” As Soulless-Puppy explained to me, Sam lived in duality. Dean was dead, but Sam lived. Sam was happy, but he grieved. Dean was with him in the watch and the car and his son, but Dean also waited for him in heaven. I hated the finale the first time I saw it, then next watched it with my boyfriend who loved it. As we were watching together and discussing it, I realized that Dean’s death scene wasn’t just about him, but about the show itself.

Dean promising Sam that he will be with Sam in Sam’s heart is also the show promising us that they will never leave it. That’s why Alex kept posting “The end has no end.” Just as Sam carried Dean with him in his heart, we will carry the show with us. I hope this helps. It’s a terrible thing to feel upset about an ending and thinking of the show this way, recognizing these patterns, is bringing me peace. I still have issues with how it was written, but now that I see what they were doing, I wish all the more that they had the chance to do it right. Please share your thoughts and experiences. I love hearing different opinions. Next up, Dean. Then Castiel.

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half-bakedboy · 3 years

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i'm not bullet proof (when it comes to you) (read on ao3)

Pairing: Evan “Buck” Buckley/Eddie Diaz Rated: Teen Summary: Every instinct inside of him told him he needed to protect Buck. He was on the other side of the truck, hands in his pockets, rocking back and forth proudly from heel to toe. Eddie had gotten out to go see him. Buck had complimented him, made Eddie blush until he had to walk away before he said something dumb. Buck was—

Where was Buck? Even though it was broad daylight in the middle of the city, not in the darkest hours of the Middle East, there was another gunshot, and he thought he heard Buck scream.

“Get down! Everyone down! Firefighter down!” A voice had shouted, but it wasn’t Buck. Where was Buck?

Speculation for Season 4 Episode 13: Suspicion (contains spoilers from the promo)

Eddie’s ears were ringing. He could hear the distant sounds of sirens but he didn’t remember turning them on when he had left the truck. He didn’t need to turn the sirens on because they had saved the little boy and the emergency was no longer that. They had done their job and everyone was safe and—

Gunshot. He thought he heard a gunshot, barely, too far away for it to fully register in his mind. He wasn’t sure at first if that was what the soft pop was because he was in L.A. He wasn’t overseas and he wasn’t in the line of enemy fire. He had rescued his team, dead and alive, and they had been flown to safety. They were back with their families and he was back with Christopher. He didn’t need to protect anyone in L.A.

Buck. Every instinct inside of him told him he needed to protect Buck. He was on the other side of the truck, hands in his pockets, rocking back and forth proudly from heel to toe. Eddie had gotten out to go see him. Buck had complimented him, made Eddie blush until he had to walk away before he said something dumb. Buck was—

Where was Buck? Even though it was broad daylight in the middle of the city, not in the darkest hours of the Middle East, there was another gunshot, and he thought he heard Buck scream.

“Get down! Everyone down! Firefighter down!” A voice had shouted, but it wasn’t Buck. Where was Buck?

Eddie tried to move, but his body was on fire and there was a heavy weight pressed against his chest. He reached to push it away, but his hand only swatted through the air. What was holding him down? He ran his fingers up his chest and along his neck, knowing before he could even pull them into view that they were covered in blood. His mind was fuzzy, his vision foggier than he remembered it to be, and when he tried to call out for help, no pleas left his scratchy throat.

Gunshot. Buck. Firefighter down.

He turned his head away from where the sun was glaring down at him, focusing on the familiar redness of the firetruck and hoping it would calm his rapidly beating heart. His eyes drifted from the window, shattered from what he could only assume was a missed bullet, down to the silver metal that spanned across the front of the truck. His mind clouded while he stared at the bumper and he couldn’t stop his eyes from dropping to the cement that was covered in blood. His blood, if he had to guess.

Underneath the truck, he could see Buck. He was lying on his stomach, a hand covering the back of his head while he reached out frantically, clawing at the clean cement in front of him. Eddie could see his lips moving, the way his eyebrows creased in panic and his eyes widened in fear, the redness of his face mixed with the splatter of blood on his neck.

Buck was hurt and Eddie had to get to him. He tried to move but he couldn’t. How could he protect Buck if he couldn’t move?

Then Buck was crawling toward him and Eddie held his hand out, fingers reaching for solace in his best friend’s. Buck was getting closer, dragging himself across the pavement, underneath the truck like a shield. A bullet clanged above Eddie’s head, destroying the perfectly polished metal and sending shards of it flying in every direction. Buck was covering his head again and that was good. That meant he could be safe. He had stopped moving which meant he wouldn’t be in the line of fire.

Eddie had to protect Buck, save Buck, make sure that Buck was okay. That was his only priority.

“Back,” Eddie choked out as Buck tried to move toward him again. “Stay back!” Eddie yelled as best he could. The intensity of his words caused his mouth to sour with the taste of blood and he knew that wasn’t a good sign. He coughed, trying to clear his throat of the pesky liquid that stopped him from warning Buck away and spat on the pavement beside him.

“Let me help you!” Buck screamed. The terror was clear in his voice and it did nothing to lessen the worry that continued to flood through Eddie.

He wasn’t sure if he could feel his legs. He could see his toes wiggling and his fingers trembled from where they stretched out for Buck again, but he had gone numb. Numb wasn’t good. Numb was far from what he should be.

He vaguely registered the hand around his wrist before he was being pulled underneath the truck and tucked firmly against Buck. The move jerked him out of the black hole his mind had pulled him into for protection against the worst pain he had ever felt that blasted through his core. He screamed in agony and he was sure the wetness of his face was from tears of misery. He thrashed and tried to sit up until he realized that only made it worse and Buck slid an arm across his chest to keep him steady. The solid weight was welcome and when focused enough, he could feel the warmth of Buck surrounding him.

He was safe so he let his eyes drift close, the noise around him deafening until everything went silent.

__________________________

“Stay with me, Eds, stay with me. Hey, that’s it. Open your eyes for me.” He awoke to Buck’s voice.

He wasn’t sure when he had fallen asleep or why his head was pounding or why he couldn’t move his body. He was strapped down to what he assumed was a backboard with Buck straddling his waist, his hands pressed to Eddie’s chest, their placement instantly recognizable. That and the way Buck huffed above him meant that Buck had just given him CPR - which meant that Buck had probably started his heart again.

He also realized that the pain surging through his abdomen was from the broken ribs Buck would have inevitably given him. He blinked rapidly, trying to take in his surroundings, his mind trying to puzzle the pieces of the last few minutes together. They were still outside the same building, the firetruck glowing brightly beside them. There was still blood on the pavement in more spots than he remembered, but people in uniforms of all kinds were stomping through it.

“Buck,” Eddie tried to say through the burn in his throat, gathering the strength he could muster to grip Buck’s bicep weakly.

“Hey, don’t talk,” Buck instructed. He must have seen Eddie’s confusion and panic because he moved his hands to cup Eddie’s face, leaning a little closer so they could focus on each other. “We almost lost you there for a minute. Don’t scare me like that, okay?” He didn’t wait for an answer. “You got shot, but I’m sure you’ve already figured that out. We don’t know what happened. One second things were fine and the next—”

Buck was babbling, a symptom of his fear, Eddie guess, so he choked out, “You okay?” He rested his hand on the blood dripping down Buck’s neck, lamely attempting to check him for injury through his own anguish.

“What did I tell you about talking. We just got your neck all bandaged up, okay? So you have to stop talking,” Buck pleaded. “Now I know how you feel around me, huh?” Buck teased but the joke was lost in the fear so prominent in Buck’s eyes as he leaned into Eddie’s touch. Eddie’s arm dropped down again because he couldn’t hold it up any longer.

“I—“ Eddie began but then he felt like he was drowning.

Why was he so weak? How bad was it? How could he make Buck look less destroyed at that moment? Was Buck going to be okay? Would he be okay?

His mind reeled with questions, all of them thwarted by the hot liquid filling his throat. He ignored the fact it was probably blood, turning his head abruptly to spit onto the already bloodstained pavement beside him. He could feel his heart slow from where Buck’s pressed against it and his lungs didn’t seem to want to take in the air he inhaled.

“Eddie, please, just stay still. Stop talking, stop moving, stop— No, no, no!” Buck shouted, “You’ve gotta stay awake, okay? You have to stay alive, Eddie. You just saved that little boy and Christopher is going to be so proud of you, just like we are.”

Eddie was safe with Buck above him, so he allowed his eyes to start drifting closed again.

Buck begged and pleaded, but Eddie couldn’t take the pain anymore. His mind hazed even as Buck pressed his lips to his forehead and whispered, “Stay alive for me.”

Eddie wasn’t sure that he could, but for Buck, he would try.

__________________________

There were flashes of bright lights. The sounds of electricity crackling above him. The smell of blood and iodine. The metallic taste he wasn’t sure would ever leave his mouth. He couldn’t feel his fingers, his body still numb, but his awareness of his other senses comforted him. He was hurt, that much he could feel, and if he had to guess, he would open his eyes and be in a hospital room.

Where was Buck?

He couldn’t get the question out of his mind. He had asked it too many times to count. Where was Buck? Was he okay? He had blood on his neck from what Eddie could briefly recall. Was he hurt? Did he get help or did he just help Eddie? Was anyone else hurt? What the hell happened?

“Hey, you gotta calm down, Mr. Diaz. Your heart rate shouldn’t be this elevated so soon after surgery,” a soft voice comforted. Eddie took a deep breath, ignoring the way his entire body burned at the subtle movement of his chest, and finally focused on the nurse beside him.

“Buck—”

“Mr. Buckley is fine. He’s been asking about you every 15 minutes since you got here and annoying most of my coworkers, but he’s okay. We told him the same thing of you, but neither of you are good listeners, are you?” She said and Eddie knew he didn’t have to answer. “You two are quite the talk of the hospital,” she noted conversationally as she checked Eddie’s vitals. He gulped dryly, thankful when she gave him a small cup of water.

“What happened?” Eddie asked. He had more questions, but he wasn’t sure he had the energy to ask them let alone wait for their answer.

“We don’t know, honey. You were shot, that’s all the information I have. I’m sure that intimidating sergeant out there will have more for you when she comes in,” the nurse explained, patting the back of Eddie’s hand softly. He knew she must have been referring to Athena and he instantly felt better that Buck had someone out there with him.

“Can he—?” He couldn’t even finish his question, suddenly hit with an onslaught of fatigue from whatever the nurse had given him for the pain. She patted his uninjured shoulder and nodded.

“He’ll be in here when you wake up,” she said and the prospect of opening his eyes to Buck was enough reassurance for him to drift off again.

__________________________

“Yeah, Bobby, he’s already been up once… Christopher’s with Pepa. I let him know what was going on and he wanted to be here, but I convinced him to wait another day… I know, I know. He’s okay, I know.”

Eddie could hear Buck’s voice as he slowly pushed himself out of the cloud surrounding his mind.

“He almost wasn’t, Bobby, and I—” A long sigh left Buck’s lips and he brought Eddie’s hand up to his mouth and pressed his lips to the back of it as it was the most normal thing in the world. Eddie cleared his throat to speak and Buck whispered, “He’s up, I gotta— Yeah, I’ll tell him. You, too, Cap.”

“Bu—“ He couldn’t even get the name out before Buck made a noise somewhere between a laugh and sob that had panic arising in Eddie. “You’re okay?” Eddie asked because even staring at the man beside him wasn’t enough for him to believe it. He tried to pull his hand away to inspect Buck’s bandages on, but he couldn’t even try to remove his hand from Buck’s grip.

“I’m okay, but only because you’re okay,” Buck explained, kissing Eddie’s skin once more. “You know, I’ve decided that the only thing worse than almost dying is thinking you are dead,” Buck began, holding Eddie’s hand to his chest as tightly as he could. “This is the second time I’ve thought you were dead and honestly, one time was too many.”

“I’m good,” Eddie choked out. He was still struggling to speak, his vocal cords much weaker than he had ever remembered them being. He used his unoccupied hand to reach up to his shoulder where he had felt blood back when he was laying on the street, but Buck swatted it away as if protecting him.

“Bullet went through your shoulder. Sent a chip of your collarbone into your neck. It just missed your carotid but did a number on your vocal cords. The sniper must have thought they were shooting me,” Buck teased and Eddie shot him a look that he hoped warned Buck away from any ridiculous notion that he should’ve been the one to get hurt.

It already pained Eddie to know Buck had to be the one to keep him alive.

“Idiot,” he said with affection before he added, “thank you.”

“For nothing,” Buck responded quickly. “I would have thrown myself in front of you if it meant saving you, Eddie, you know that,” Buck noted and Eddie knew just how true that was. Eddie remembered Buck crawling toward him, putting himself in the crossfire of still flying bullets even after Eddie warned him away.

“Stop doing that,” Eddie pleaded, but Buck shook his head in response.

“If one thing became abundantly clear to me today, Eds, it’s that I will never stop putting you first. Seeing you lying there--” Buck shook his head and Eddie squeezed his hand to urge him to continue, “--it’s like you’ve always been just out of my reach and I don’t want that anymore. I can’t do that anymore.”

The implication of the words wasn’t lost on Eddie. They had been dancing around each other for weeks, months, maybe even years if Eddie thought about it. It was obvious to everyone around them, including themselves, that their relationship wasn’t as simple as coworkers, best friends, or partners. There had been an unwritten line between them that neither was willing to cross, both too scared for the future and what it could mean, what it could damage.

The admission shocked Eddie more than the bullet had. He had always thought that Buck would never be the one to fully cross over, always allowing Eddie to be the one to control the ease and direction of their relationship, so to hear him erase the last of that nearly invisible line had his heart soaring.

“I don’t—“ Eddie coughed, burning pain rising through his entire body as he struggled for air. He could hear Buck calling for a nurse and felt their hands separating but he wouldn’t allow it. He pulled Buck back because he couldn’t allow him to move away again and risk him backpedaling his words. “I don’t want that either,” Eddie said through bated breaths as the same nurse from before pumped him with new medications. He sent her a grateful smile and her eyes shined back as she watched the two of them. Everyone always looked at them like that and for the first time, Eddie knew what they saw.

“Well, good. I’m glad we’ve, uh, cleared that up?” Buck squinted, his eyebrows furrowing as if he was still confused, and Eddie reached up to stroke the side of his face where the skin around his eyes had crinkled.

“We’ll talk,” Eddie promised, his hand falling only to be caught by Buck who entwined their fingers and brought them to his mouth again. He nodded before resting his head on Eddie’s lap, cradling Eddie’s hand against his chest as he let his own eyes fall shut. It couldn’t have been comfortable but he figured he wouldn’t be able to send Buck home even if he tried, and he wasn’t about to try. Instead, Eddie rested his other hand in Buck’s hair and gazed down at him until he couldn’t keep his eyes open anymore.

Buck was there. He was mostly uninjured and holding onto Eddie as if nothing would ever make him let go.

Buck was safe, so Eddie was, too.

#buddie #evan buckley #eddie diaz #buck x eddie #911 #911 on fox #911 speculation #speculation #but i really want it to be real ajskldf;asd #my writing

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kdramachitchat · 3 years

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Episode 4 focuses on Junwan handling good news and bad news. Not only work-stress but also his relationship. This episode was also the closure I needed to learn more about him.

Junwan full of worry

Junwan is fretting about his girlfriend after she suffers from an injury and medically explains on what will happen after. He called up at 2am due to the worry. Iksun says she’ll take things lightly but Junwan wants her to fully rest but she resists and says that she can look after herself. That’s the problem if you have a boyfriend who is a doctor. Who knows better?

Junwan delivers good news to Minchan’s parents & a heart is available for Eunji

Junwan delivers good news that Rubin is out of surgery. He updates the parents and tells them that the ultrasound and heartbeat is in good condition. Minchan’s body is just getting used to the new heart and is adjusting and they will move him to the regular ward tomorrow.

Minchan’s mother notices Eun-ji’s mother looking lonely and sad at the cafeteria.

Eunji has woke up and cant move her left arm. Once Junwan learns about the potential donor he delivers the good news to Eunji’s parents. He also explains the VAD dependency and will do his very best to save Eunji.

He gives the breakdown to the parents; due to the long dependency of the VAD, there are risks, but he tells them he will do his best to save Eunji. He also told the parents not to give up.

Jun-wan opens up to Ikjun

You know your close if you feel like something wrong is happening to your friernd. Junwan is stressed and opens up about the surgeries but not about his girlfriend, he mentions about his father instead. Ikjun is worried that he’s sleep deprived and tells him he’s worried, also to eat his snacks. Ikjun is a good friend.

Iksun breaks up with Junwan

It goes from bad to worse for Jun-wan in episode 4 as he receives heartbreaking news.

Iksun reveals during their private conversation with Junwan that she has fallen for someone else. Junwan knows that its with the guy who called about her accident. Then there’s silence which is the obvious answer. Junwan feels completely down and his friends are worried about him. We also seen the worst of Junwan as he lost weight and gets sad most of the time. I honestly didnt like Junwan’s character during Season 1 but for this episode on Season 2 i really felt bad for him and he doesnt deserve it.

Iksun reveals her medical condition to her brother Ikjun but asks to keep it a secret. Ikjun realizes after as he figured it out. Why was she keeping it from Junwan? Does that mean they’ve broken up? Obvious answer.

After watching this episode you just want to give a big hug to Junwan.

#2021 #Hospital Playlist #Hospital Playlist Season 2

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daddychims · 4 years

Text

Offside Pt 13

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11, Part 12, Part 13

Series Masterlist!

Genre: Smut, Soccer AU, College AU

Pairings: Soccer Player! Jungkook X Sports Trainer! Reader

Word Count: 2k

Other BTS members all make a cameo as well because I’m an OT7 Trash!

You work as a sports trainer, providing basic first aid and injury management for the Hanguk University’s soccer team. Going with your mundane life of caring for the dozen of guys hurting themselves in the soccer game takes a turn when one of the guys catches your eyes. It’s not his breathtakingly good looks or his muscular athletic body usually seducing girls at the campus that catches your eyes. But the action plan in your kit, indicating he is diagnosed with Asthma is what draws your eyes time and time again to the Golden Boy of Hanguk University.

Warning: Slow burn, eventual smut, Taehyung being a freaking tease the whole time, Also Jimin not letting the female MC live for one day, Fuckboy!Jungkook, Asthmatic! Jungkook , mentions of episodes of Asthma, Take your Ventolin kids, Take your medications kids!

“Look Jeon, I’m saying this as your Hyung and your senior, you need to learn to save your energy if you wanna play for long,”

You lift one of the boxes of tapes and reach for the cabinet shelf at the top to settle the heavy box there as you listen to the captain’s calm but intimidating voice

“I’m grateful you’re giving it your all, but as the captain I can’t watch you exert yourself to the half time and tap out the second half on my watch.”

You bite the corner of your lips, heart beating rapidly at the warning behind the words that leaves Hoseok’s voice. The captain is often calm and collected, but he doesn’t hesitate to scold his teammates as their leader.

“I had a chat with Seokjin Hyung after our meeting last week,” Hoseok continues with a hesitant tone “In the past two years I’ve never allowed any special considerations for you just because of you condition- “

“Hyung, just do as you always do,” Jungkook finally speaks up “I’m fine, Seokjin Hyung is just blowing it out of proportion.”

“If he didn’t, I would have brought it,” Hoseok interjects the younger’s argument “I’ve been watching you play since day one, I can tell when you’re tired or when you’re in a slump because of your condition. And this is definitely more than just a pre-seasonal fatigue …”

A long silence follows the captain’s words and you wish you would have left the changing room earlier tonight so you wouldn’t have to now eavesdrop on yet another conversation on Jeon's asthma that somehow worries you more than your own final exams and undone assignments.

“You need to learn to pace yourself through the game,” Hoseok suggests “Let’s talk about this before the next game, we’ll have to talk to a couple of midfielder guys to back you up. You’re our striker wild card, you get what I mean right?”

“Yes captain,” Jungkook finally speaks up “I’ll talk to the guys and we’ll figure it out.”

“Alright, go home and get some rest.” Hoseok pats the younger’s shoulder before heading out of the changing room

You quickly turn around and keep yourself busy to make it less obvious that you were listening to every single word across the wall.

“Thank you for tonight Y/N.” Hoseok calls for you and you turn to face him

“Anytime captain,” you salute the guy “How’s your ankle?”

“Pretty good,” he nods as he twirls his shin around “I can do with a bit of tape on the next game.”

“You know where to find me, Cap!” You nod reassuringly

“Thank, Oh and …” he smiles “I was meant to buy you a dinner for a while now. I still owe you for Jiwoo's party.”

“Lets keep that after the finals,” you offer “You can buy me dinner to celebrate Hanguk’s win as well!”

“Of course,” he laughs, his face lighting up at the prospects of his team winning “I should probably tell Namjoon we’ve got you on our side then.”

Your smile immediately fade and you furrow your eyebrows “Don’t you dare-“

“I’m just joking,” he laughs watching your reaction “your secret is safe with me” he turns around and opens the door as he waves “Goodnight.”

You chuckle at the guy’s childish remark, before getting back to the boxes that are waiting in the corner of the room for you to finish up. You grab another heavy box and groan as you reach at the top cupboard to place it in when someone hovers over your body and grabs the box and easily places them where you were intending to place them.

“So, you’re on our side huh?”

Your suspicion turns certain as you hear the guy’s familiar voice and you turn around, gulping as you realise the guy’s body is pressed against yours

“I didn’t say that,” you quickly interject “I’m with anyone who shoots the winning goal. And if that’s SNU then I’m siding with them.”

“Mhmm, So you wanna tell me you’ll be siding with Park Jimin,” He scoffs, as his tongue pokes to the corner of his cheek, “I doubt you’d prefer SNU’s 3 inch shooting his shots?”

“Jeon-“ you immediately speak up to interrupt his lewd words when he presses his index on your lips

“Once you get a taste of Hanguk's big boy shots, you’ll change your mind …” he hesitates as a playful smirk tingles on the corner of his lips “I don’t know if you’ve heard but we know how to play with big balls here."

“Of course, you do!” you roll your eyes mockingly

“Do you want me to show you?” He raises an eyebrow, taking on the challenge “The ball is on the table, babe” he chuckles, playfully placing an intonation on the words “you just gotta decide to play.”

“Jeon, I’m on duty!” you sigh pointing your eyebrows at the boxes across the room "I dont have time to play with balls!"

“Fine!” His face immediately drops and he loosens his body’s cage around you to allow you to move away with an annoyed expression but you don’t stay back to watch as you quickly walk to the rest of boxes.

“Shouldn’t you be home already?” you look back at him as you lift another box “why are you still here?”

“I’m sure you heard Hoseok hyung scolding me,” Jungkook sighs as he rest his weight on the shelf and grabs the box as you stop before him to place them on the top “Why do you act like you didn’t eavesdrop on us?”

“I d-didn’t,” you stutter as you quickly turn around to grab another box “I don’t know what you’re talking about!”

“Of course, you did,” He chuckles watching you struggles with the box in your hand “Aren’t you always waist deep in my business?”

“Fine,” you pout as you hand him the box, “I heard the conversation, but its not because I wanted to,” you sigh “Captain’s voice is now chronically loud after screaming at you guys on the field.”

“That …” he suddenly burst out laughing and you unconsciously smile along “is true, I can’t really fault you on that.”

You watch the guy’s genuine smile, spreading from his lips all the way to his cheek and then his deer-like eyes. You realize it’s the first time you see this smile adorning his lips, different to his usual cocky smirk he loves to throw your way.

“So are you just gonna stand there and watch me?” His lips curve on one side as he stands with his arms crossed

“What do you mean?” you ask in confusion

“I’m waiting for your two cents on my life,” He says in a mocking tone "dont be shy, Y/N!"

“I’m not that nosy okay?” You complain as you turn around, only then realising his sarcasm

“Oh you’re not?” He chuckles in amusement “You have more opinion on my life than my parents.”

“That is not true-” you respond defensively but immediately stop mid-sentence seeing his unimpressed expression “Fine, maybe I’ve been a bit nosy in the past. But I’m a changed woman now …” you say in a determined tone “I’m not doing that anymore.”

“Not doing what?” he steps forward, filling the space between the two of you “Hmm?”

“sticking myself into your life.” you respond nervously looking into his eyes

“That’s unfortunate,” he squints looking into your eyes “Because I decided to stick myself into yours …” he smirks “or shall I say into YOU?”

“Jeon-“ you warn and he immediately throw his hands up in surrender

“Fine, no more messing around!” he declares as he points at the boxes at top shelf “you’re done here right? Lets go!”

“Where?” you stop him and ask with a confused tone

“My place,” he furrows his eyebrows “You don’t wanna check my meds?” He asks suspiciously “If not then-“ his face immediately lights up in a teasing way

“No,” you immediately interrupt “lets go.” You say as you quickly grab your bag and walk ahead of him, hearing him chuckle behind you

You stare at the guy who walks to his mini fridge across the room and grabs a bottle of beer and waves it to you “Want some?”

“I’m good,” you quickly shake your head, knowing the last thing you’d want is being drunk in the guy’s room

“Alright!” he shrugs as he snaps the beer open and takes a sip, capturing your attention to his adam’s apple that wiggles between the toned muscles of his neck

Your eyes immediately drift around the room nervously trying to unsee the unintentionally lewd scene as you mutter “Where are your meds?”

“In the first draw,” he points at his nightstand beside his bed and you nod before reaching and opening the first dra

“OH,” you gasp, as you stare at the shiny packets of condom for a few seconds before looking up and making a momentary eye contact with him

“Like what you see?” He smirks watching you get all flustered

“You mean another reminder of your Golden reputation?” you mock as you scan through the shiny packets for his medication “can’t get enough!”

“you know now that you’re here …” he leans closer, his warm breath hitting your neck “We can put these and my golden reputation to some good use tonight!” he suggest wiggling his eyebrows

“Your medication,” you scold patting his shoulder “Can you put yourself to some use and find them?”

“Of course!” he nods with a chuckle as he fishes through the drawer and finally finds the ziplock bag

You sigh as you grab the ziplock bag and take out the device to check them as the guy climbs his bed and plops himself beside you on the soft mattress.

“Wow, you really haven’t even opened these!”

“Was waiting for you to pop the pandora’s box open for me,” he laughs as he raises an eyebrow “and maybe I can pop your pandora’s box open after!”

“In your dreams,” you flash a fake smile before taking out one of the devices “Have you used a DPI before?”

“if by DPI you mean dick pic invitations, of course!” he beams with a naughty smile “I always use DPIs to set the mood.”

“Dry Powdered Inhaler,” you pronounce each loud and clear for the guy “It’s the same medications but instead its in powder form.” You explain as you watch the guy in front of you yawn

“In other words It’s the same shit as the other one and I need to take it,” he nods “lets get this over and done with, I’m tired-“

“No,” you quickly wiggle the device away and hide it behind you “you need to know the difference so you can use it properly. Since this is powder you should take it differently.”

“Its not that deep, Y/N,” Jungkook deadpans “I chug it up my lungs and we can finally on more important stuff,” he pauses before smiling "like your pandora's box!"

“ I’ll just explain it very simple and quick," you state with a stern tone "just listen to me once”

“You see listening hasn't always been my strong point!” He shrugs

“Jeon! Please just once!” you ask with a frustrated tone

“Mhm let me think,” his pupils twirl around before stopping on you “why don’t you try teaching me like you did earlier today,” he smirks as he shift himself up on the bed, back resting on the bedpost as he man spreads his thighs “Coming close does help me listen better.”

You furrow your eyebrows, eyes travelling from his face to his thighs “If you pull one of your stupid game-“

“Don’t worry,” he throws his hands up “I’ll just be a good student, full attention on you and will listen like a good boy.”

“fine,” you murmur as you shift closer and settle on the guy’s thighs “after you put the inhaler on your lips, you see this button here,” you show him, without looking up “You need to press this so you can prime the device,”

“Uh huh,” he murmurs as he leans closer on your face trying to get a good view of the device “I press the button and then …” he says as his hand wraps around your waist, resting just above your hip

“A-And then you press again to release the powder,” you explain, trying to keep your composure as you feel his hands softly massaging the side of your waist “Since this is powder, you should take a fast deep breath in,” and you gasp as his hand wiggles under your shirt almost In unison with your instruction

“Uh huh …” he nods with a smirk, fully aware of the effect his sinful hands make on you “I take a fast breath in and?”

“then you need to hold your breath for 10 seconds,” you release the breath your holding, almost sighing as his cold hand soothes your skin “to allow the powder to settle in your lungs.”

“Mhmm,” he nods, continuing to touch you under your shirt as he murmurs “I think I got it,” he smirks as he leans closer to you, and you finally break your eyes from the device and look into his eyes “So I press the button,” he says and as the words leaves his lips his hands travel under the waistband of your pants, aiming for your core “to prime the device,” you gulp as his hand rest on your hip bone, dangerously close to your crotch “Then I press the button again,” he smirks as he reaches further down, thumb touching your clit and a small moan leaves your lips “and take a fast breath in right?”

He waits for your response with a pause as he continues to rub against your clit, slender fingers now reaching lower to spread your wetness around “then I just hold my breath for 10 seconds,” he suggests, watching you perform the exact instructions as you hold your breath under his touch “Right?”

“J-Jungkook …”

“Ssshhh,” he hushes your voice as he presses his forehead against yours “See how wet you are for me,” he smiles in satisfaction as he rubs your juices on your core "You want this as much as I do babe!"

“F-Fuck,” you gasp as he pushes a finger in your folds and your body tenses on his lap “Jungkook please …” you whine as you press your forehead against his collarbone

“Tell me what you want, babe” he instructs in a gentle tone “Remember, you just need to tell me!”

“Jungkook,” you gasp as your part your hooded lids, distancing your face from his shoulder and looking at his face, a playful smile dancing on his lips as he stares back at you with his darkened gaze, waiting for your response.

It takes you exactly 5 seconds to register what he’s doing and you immediately jolt away from him, forgetting about your awaiting climax

“fuck!” you quickly distance your body, settling back on his bed staring at him in a state of panic

“Hey, relax!” he says in an authoritative tone

“we shouldn’t do this- “

“why?” He raises an eyebrow looking at you “You don’t like it?” he asks with confidence all over his expression as if he’s challenging you to say you don’t.

You look at him, parting your lips to say something but nothing comes out. You can’t possibly lie through your teeth and say you didn’t like him knuckles deep in your pussy so you just blush and look away to his response.

“I-I’m sorry Jeon, let’s do the medication check another day,” you brave through the words as you quickly fix your shirt “I should probably go home-“

“No wait,” he immediately interjects, shifting on the bed to lock your body between himself and the mattress “Do you really wanna leave?” He asks, as he presses himself on your body, his hardened cock pressing against your thighs as he asks, “Even if I tell you I’m this hard just for you?”

“For m-me?” you ask, pupil dilating as you digest his words

“Can’t you see,” His eyes shine with lust as he tilts his head “That you’re the only medication I’d ever need?”

Your eyes widen as he leans closer and presses his lips on yours ...

#jeon jungkook #jeon jungkook smut #jeon jungkook x female reader #jeon jungkook x reader #jeon jungkook x you #jungkook x reader #jungkook scenario #jungkook x female reader #jungkook soccer au #bts soccer au #offside #daddychims #jungkook #jungkook smut #bts jungkook x reader

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ezrasarm · 4 years

Text

Come Back To Me In Waking Dream

[ Day 5 | Angstaggedon Masterlist ]

Pairing: Ezra x Reader

Word count: 2.4K

Summary: Torn apart by the forces of the universe, Ezra becomes a ghost of himself.

Warnings: ANGST, hints at depressive episodes and thoughts of death, more angst. This is not an uplifting story.

Credits: A huuuuuge thank you to @din-damn-djarin and @chaotic-noceur for beta reading and letting me use them as a human squash court for me to bounce my ideas off of! The title is inspired by a piece of poetry written by David Keenan that preludes his song “Full Stop” and I thought it fit just right.

A/N: Not to toot my own horn or anything but... I hope y’all brought tissues.

As with any line of work, the longer you’re in it, the smaller the world- or in this case, the universe- seems to become. You and Ezra had made a number of first encounters through your years working the aurelac business. It wasn’t glamorous by any means, no matter what the precious gem associated with it might suggest. The work was rough and often fruitless. But, on those rare occasions that you managed to find a sizeable deposit in those tangles of rhizomatic roots- provided you had the skill to extract them, one, without killing yourself, and two, without damaging the delicate bounty in the process- you could make quite the pretty penny off of it. And you could make it fast. It was part of what made the industry so cutthroat in the first place. It was also entirely the reason that making lasting relationships, business or otherwise, was nearly impossible for you.

Both Ezra and yourself had gotten into prospecting and harvesting aurelac even before the rush. It seemed like your timelines were interlinked. You couldn’t stop running into one another if you tried. You could recall quite vividly the first time you saw him. His rich smooth voice and exuberant charm were not things that detracted attention from him. So he was hard to miss in the small, dingy convenience store on the freighter back from the Bakhroma system. When you finally acquaintanced yourselves with one another quite sometime later, he insisted he had seen you around here and there long before that. You argued that he must have been mistaken because you couldn’t possibly have failed to notice him and that peculiar blonde patch in his hair. And that even if you did, you would have heard him coming even sooner. “That,” he said, “is not necessarily true.” But none the less you managed to crack him up. He’s had a soft spot for you ever since.

You had gotten to know each other pretty well through the many drinks you shared when you found yourselves on the same planet and the odd job you would work together in between. You now knew him well enough that if you were feeling bold you might venture to call him a friend. Perhaps even admit that at times you thought you could be a little more than that. Although you would never have the nerve to say it to his face.

Then he disappeared. One moment he was on The Pug scanning the boards, the next he was gone. Funnily enough, the job he managed to scrounge up was one you had been eyeing yourself. You got pulled away on a contract with an old client of yours to do some appraisals and he set off for this prospecting mission of his. He said it would take a week tops and that he had something he wanted to tell you when he got back. Then you never saw him again.

You see, Ezra had just been working up the courage to tell you how he felt. He swore the next time he saw you would be the day he told you he loved you. That you were the star of his dreams when he slept and the object of his reveries when he woke. That practically every moment of every day he spent away from you he was thinking about where you were or what you were up to. None of this stopped when his pod crash-landed on Bakhroma Green.

He just needed one more job to save up to take you out on Kamrea, your temporary home when you could afford to live there. He had this grand plan to woo you with a nice meal and a necklace made from a small aurelac crystal he had harvested on one of the first jobs you had worked together. He knew how hard you pushed yourself. You never gave yourself a break. He thought it would be nice to treat you to more than just a drink in a bar for once.

It was supposed to be a simple job. Prospect potential dig sites, maybe even harvest a little while he was at it, then get the hell out of there. But none of that happened. Instead, he got stranded on that godforsaken rock. It was years before anyone came to his rescue. He lost his arm somewhere along the way. A rogue thrower shot from a skittish young sater. He was normally quite conscious of staying out of their territory but with the seasons changing, foraging for food brought him out of his comfort zone. The resulting infection cost him his dominant hand.

But his physical injury was hardly the worst of his ailments on his extended visit to the Bakhroma moon. He was quite positive he was going insane hauled up in the damaged drop pod that only served as a reminder he wouldn’t be leaving the forest moon any time soon. As he quickly came to find, he and prolonged periods of time without human contact were not a good combination. While saters and other prospectors may have passed through every now and again, he often had enough trouble bargaining with them for his life, let alone a ride off the dumb rock. They never stuck around long and they certainly weren’t talkative. His mental health took a nosedive quite early on. He took to talking to himself, writing to keep his mind busy. At his worst, he could recall experiencing fits of hysteria and even hallucinations. He had the delirious diary entries to prove it.

It was around the time he lost his arm that he began to lose hope too. The longer he was stranded there, the more doubt that there would be any way out at all began to creep into his mind. There were some nights where the thought of seeing you again, brushing that rebellious strand of hair out of your face and pulling you into a long-awaited kiss, was the only thing that kept him going. He could still see your face. The upward quirk to your lip and the light graze of your hand against his as you passed him by in the hall on his way out. You were in some big rush as you always were. You assured him you would see him later. All he could think of was how wrong that assumption was now. He never could have imagined that would be the last time he saw you. And now here he was projecting phantom memories on the blank ceiling of the pod, cursing himself for not telling you what he should have the moment he knew. He refused to let himself die without letting you know how he felt. Maybe he would be able to rest easier if you knew.

For the first couple cycles you worried yourself sick. The risk associated with your field of work was not lost on you. He wouldn’t just leave you like that- he couldn’t. You wouldn’t let him. But years had passed. It soon came time for you to confront the acceptance of one of two realities: either he was dead, or he had abandoned you. The thought confused you. He wasn’t yours to be abandoned by and yet the resentment that came with it stung you just the same. You couldn’t tell which hurt you more but you knew you couldn’t sit around waiting for a dead man. And if he was alive, you refused to spend another second pining over a man who would up and leave you without so much as a goodbye. So you swallowed your yearning, the nag in your heart that clung to the hope he would still come back for you, and you moved on.

When Ezra got off the Green he hardly recognized himself anymore. His hair had grown shaggy despite his attempts to keep it under control, there were patches of grey in his dishevelled beard, his face had thinned, and those were just the physical changes. It was one of the last sling-backs before they killed the Central-BG line for good. A Kaslo Porting team, dropped to scavenge for old scraps and parts they could mark up and sell second hand, stumbled upon his pod. He was deathly frail when they found him. With his food supply having long since been depleted he had almost poisoned himself by mistaking a species of berry for its edible cousin in his desperation. If they hadn’t found him sooner, the doctors on board the freighter couldn’t see how he would have survived. He wound up hospitalized for weeks.

After all that time with just one thought on his mind, he knew he had to find you. Upon being discharged he searched high and low for you. He felt foolish checking all your old haunts. It had been so long. But he didn’t know where else to begin. He checked with mutual friends and old employers. They all seemed too surprised by being in the presence of a ghost to give him a straight answer.

He went to just about every place he could think of, asking your name as though it carried the same weight to everyone else as it did to him. He was sure he had searched every last corner of the galaxy. When he kept coming up empty he began to doubt whether you yourself were alive. It seemed like he was the only who knew who you were. It was like you didn’t exist. It was like you never had existed. He went so far as to question if he had made you up. If you were merely some fucked up defence mechanism manufactured by his brain to keep him hopeful. To keep him from giving up so long ago as he had been tempted to do. But he couldn’t bring himself to stop looking. That would be admitting something to himself that he would never be ready to. His head would perk up if through the chatter of crowded spaces he would hear a laugh similar to your own carry across the room. He would lose his place in conversations when he would see a flash of hair not unlike your own out of his peripheral vision.

Then one day he found himself back on The Pug, scanning the boards the exact same way he had been the first time he laid eyes on you. He wasn’t actively looking for you. No more than he always was. But sure enough there you were. Your arms crossed over your chest and your gaze tilted upward to read the job postings that flashed by not unlike flight numbers in an airport. You had matured a little. You wore your hair differently now. Shorter than he remembered but he liked it just the same. Your posture had changed too. You looked calmer, more confident and at ease as you watched the boards. Not tense and nervous as you used to be when you lived paycheck to paycheck, desperate for every opportunity you could leap at. Life had treated you well, he remarked to himself. As it should have. You looked just as beautiful as you were in that faded photograph of the two of you he carried everywhere with him. The same one he studied every night as he tried to fall asleep on those lonely nights on the Green.

He felt his heart leap in his chest when you turned in his direction, a graceful smile across your face and your arms outstretched. He felt the adrenaline kick in, like a jolt of electricity through his entire body. He realized then that he hadn’t moved since he had laid eyes on you, too startled by the long anticipated discovery to function. A hysterical grin had stretched across his face. He couldn’t believe he had finally found you. That you were there standing right in front of him after all he had been through trying to get back to you. He was just about to step towards you. To shout your name, take you in his arms and do what he should’ve done long before. That’s when a young tike, hardly three years old came darting past him, tripping over her own feet as she bumbled towards you at top speed.

Then it dawned on him. That smile? Those open arms? They weren’t for him.

You crouched and swept the child up in your arms, peppering her face with kisses as she giggled back at you. It was now that he could see the resemblance. The twinkle in the young girl’s eye and the way she threw her head back when she laughed were not foreign to him. A man he didn’t recognize came trotting after her, scooping her up from your embrace before leaning down and pressing a kiss to your lips.

It finally occurred to him why no one had recognized your name.

You looked happy. The smile on your face made his heart swell as he watched you from a distance. He only wished that he was the cause of it. The realization struck him that he could never be that for you. A husband. A father to your child. Even if he wanted to, years of breathing in toxic particles does things to a man. Now he was too late anyway. He had never wished so strongly that he hadn’t taken that job, that he hadn’t boarded that pod and set off to Bakhroma Green. Tears stung his eyes as he choked back the confession welling in the back of his throat. He couldn’t do that to you now. You deserved better than the trauma of a phantom walking back into your life after all this time. And stood there, every semblance of hope he had harboured since your fingertips slid off his own in that hallway shattered around his feet, he considered something. He should’ve let himself die on that rock. It would have been a more merciful death than the one he had just experienced as he watched the very dream that kept him alive all that time fall apart in front of him.

[ Angstageddon Masterlist | Ezra’s Arm Masterlist ]

-- Angstageddon Taglist

@chaoticspaceidiot @engineeredfiction @pedropascalito @dreamgirl-67 @hillarymurray4 @wille-zarr @oloreaa @this-cat-is-dea @marydjarin @roxypeanut @cryptkeepersoul @agirllovespasta @wickedfrsgrl @dindisneydjarin @opheliaelysia @aeryntheofficial @adikaofmandalore @goldafterglow @yespolkadotkitty @chibi-liz05 @scarlettvonsass @rpcvliz @cinewhore @basura2319 @theravenreads @mxndoscyarika @jaime1110 @f0rever15elf @pancakepike @phoenixhalliwell @ahopelessromanticwritersworld @synystersilenceinblacknwhite

#ezra #ezra x reader #ezra (prospect)#ezra (prospect) x reader #prospect 2018 #prospect #angstageddon #angst week

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popculturebuffet · 3 years

Text

The Loud House Reviews: The Cow-Pie Kid and Saved by the Spell

Welcome back Loudiacs.. I .. don’t know what the fandom calls themselves. And given I dont’ know anyone personally in the fandom and the going into the tag is like living in a living nightmare.. it’s easier to keep workshopping a name till either someone tells me or I find one that sounds right. Loudites.. there we go that didn’t take long. Point is we’re back in The Loud House, In The Loud House for the first regular coverage, i.e. when I cover a show as It comes out of the season. And I was lucky enough to actually see the episode same day this time and with a promo that at least gives me images to work with, so yeah, i’m pretty pumped. And not just because I can cross this one off because SOMEBODY has a birthday tommorow.. no not me, that was last month.

There ya go. But yeah the show’s back. I’m excited, your excited, i’m scared because nick dosen’t give a clear schedule out ahead of time so i’m left wondering when one’s going to pop up and when to get it on my schedule now I have one... it’s a good time. Seriously though Nick needs to get their scheduling in order. So i’m happy to be back, your happy to have me here, but probably not happy to have spoilers so let’s take this under the cut and we can talk about cow pies, magic, and ... how this block is weirdly almost all lincoln episodes.

The Cow-Pie Kid: Yeah.. this was the only bit from cow pie kid I could find. Tons of stuff to mine from for saved by the spell. Nothing for that one. Weird. Anyways our story opens with Lynn’s baseball team, who we’ve met before.. and include friends who have played other sports with her and that guy she had a crush on for all of five minutes because the writers kinda forgot L is for Love happened for anyone but Luna and Luann.

Okay look MOST of the love intrests introduced there were not great and while Lincoln needs one NOW, at the time he really did not as the Ronnie Anne thing had not, and still has not, been properly resolved. Still vastly prefer him with Stella and her with Sid, i’m just saying closure would be nice. Look i’m getting off topic point is one besides Sam, who was great out of the gate and not just for being gay.. though that was a lot of it, and Benny, whose objectively a really sweet kid and damn likeable. Luaggie shippers feel free to boo me, I understand.. dosen’t change my mind or the fact Poly exists to fix that. I mean why not both I ask you. Besides them, we had Chazz, a loveable chubby guy who Leni was into and worked at clothing store and knew his fashion stuff. and was charmed by her romantic gesture. He just seemd sweet and it was implied via background stuff they were still dating.. but he hasnt’ shown up since despite her working AT the mall and that being her main arc for the last two seasons.

Just why? What’s wrong with the chubby fashion boy? Why? Did they decide they had too many romance arcs.. at exactly two? I get focusing on sam, because duh, and because that was awesome.. but you’ve had 2 full seasons since then and again Leni and him now work in the same location if not the same store, which in itself is a plot. I don’t ask much from you show.. well okay I do but let me clarify I don’t ask much from you that you could actually do: I know i’m never getting my a diffrent world style spinoff with lori and bobby. I know Zach is going nowhere and i’m just going to have to get over it, I will not, but I DO know you could include chaz and just won’t. So do that at least. I will put up with several more seasons of Zach if it means this adorable love story continues. It’s even easy enough to pick up this late: they are both stupid. Work with that. Gah... coach if you’d please.

Thanks coach. Okay so one tangent later we’re back to the episode. Point is her team is loosing even though Lynn’s the captain now, and while she’s perfectly encouraging it’s not winning games. Lynn is understandably dejected in the car not helped by the sports commentor guys from the game... commenting about it on the radio...

I mean.. I get sports can have dry spots and all that but who covers a middle school basketball team on the radio that isn’t the middle school radio station. I mean I genuinely can’t decide which is more sad... a radio personality doing a children’s baseball game on his own show, or having so much trouble getting one that he’s apperaing on the middle school radio show. And I COULD say it’s just a guest spot but he’s talking like he knows what’s going on intmatiley> Did his daughter ask him to? I mean I know radio’s fallen pretty far but I dind’t think it was that much in the basement. Do a podcast at least man.

Okay before I go on another Tangent point is Lynn feels it’s her fault as Captain.. which granted whoever the coach is should be .. but it genuinely looks like they don’t HAVE a coach. Maybe they had to sack him to pay for the newly refrubished av department? I dunno. Point is she feels bad and Lynn Sr vows to cheer her up.. before stopping for farm fresh eggs. Which.. yeah can’t blame him. He’s a cook, and Liam’s family likely has good prices. He can buy for both home and restraunt at once. I mean he has a van and only one occupant at the moment. Don’t judge him. But this little detour DOES help Lynn’s mood. Her problem is the team lacks a decent pitcher, since Lynn herself was banned for throwing one at a heckling goat. The Lawsuit is ongoing and that made me laugh a lot. But Lynn finds Happy Gilmore style that Liam.. has a really great arm. Granted instead of actuall balls it’s with cowpies because this series really loves a shit joke, hence the title and the new nickname for liam, the cow pie kid.. but compared to some of the series toilet humor it’s a lot less in your face. But with Liam being so good Lynn can’t help but sign him to the team and Liam being a sweetie pie is happy to agree. I have.. not hid even for a second how much I liked Liam or wanted him, and Stella, to show up outside of Lincoln episodes more often, or even get his own again. That day.. has come. Not only does LIam now have a roll entirely outside his friend group, but this episode’s about him and Lynn together.. not in that way.. yet. Someday.. Point is my boy is in the spotlight and I could not be happier. And thankfully.. Lynn’s at her best. What I feared would be an episode about her overtraining him and making him not enjoy the game, htat old chesnut instead.. she just genuinely helps mentor him. She’s tough but fair as she helps him get his aim right as he’s used to firing Cow Pie’s, so the weight distrbution is off. So she helps train him and .. it’s really cute honestly, with her genuinely helping him and showing a softer side and later realizing she had him thinking about it too hard and just having him not think.. and going by instinct naturally works for a carefree and easygoing guy like liam. Wouldn’t be suprised if he went ultra instinct eventually.. but that’s for another episode. They also have a pig pile together.. which sounds bad but is just pigs piling on liam and lynn gladly gets on top of the pigs and god that sounds worse. next scnee.

So Liam gets ahead and becomes the star pitcher for the zanarkand abes.. I mean the Royal Woods Kangaroos, and they just keep wining and wining and wining. Their like glomgold: all they do is win... but probably with less attempted corpse dancing. Problem is as we see during the montage Liam’s arm is slowly but surley getting cramped and while he wins hte next game.. his arm gives out from noodle arm. The good news is with rest, he can fix it, as her injury prone friend Paula, whose somehow allowed to play with crutches despite ALL the legal and moral issues that raises explains. but they don’t have days to rest it. So insane plans it is! So Lynn goes to her sisters for herlp..specifically lisa int he hopes her mad science can either fix his pain or turn him into the hulk. Neither happens.. yet. I mean LIam is so sweet if he IS a hulk, we won’t know yet. But the green door will.. it always knows. IT ALWAYS KNOWS. Lynn bemonas her luck.. before Lucy appears!

I JUST said last month when reviewing 11 louds a leapin that I missed the duo of her and lynn and lo and behold here we are. While we dno’t get much of the two fo them, it is still nice to see Lynn suprised by her scares and Lucy trying to use the dark arts to heal his pain.. which actually works. Lucy’s upgraded from wants to be a witch to full witch.

So yeah her dark magic works and now Liam is fine just fine as the championship game approaches. Until naturally it isn’t. While Lucy STOPPED the pain, she didn’t make anything better, just numbed it so Liam’s arm’s pretty bad and Lisa suggests there’s a 70 perfecnt chance he’ll wreck it if he does so.. and while Lynn is naturlaly, given one of her main traits is asshole, ready to risk that.. she realizes she can’t. Rusty is on her team following her orders.. and no matter how good a W feels.. she can’t trade in someone’s health for one. Honestly bettter than most sports managers ngl. So Paula subs in and misses, loosing them the game.. but Lynn. takes it in stride, having realized she can win next year and having finally realized what being the leader REALLY means. She can work on paula’s curve, give Liam a break, and win next time... which she’ll have because time dosen’t work normally in this show’s dimension and a solid timeline is just a pipedream, so she probably has another year of being 14 to redo this and has become aware of it. I’m scared and excited for what that means. Liam celebrates with a pig pile of two and we get a REALLY fucking cute shot of the two being happy and what not before a pig jumps on them still though.. yeah I ship it now. Liam taps into the space where I thought a black void of misery and douchebaggery was but ti turns out is in fact a heart, something few can do with Lynn and Lynn can protect him form bullies and is perfectly suited for his rough hewn farmboy styles. Point is their cut.e And so was this episode. IT was a really nice return to the series and it was again REALLY fucking great to see one of Lincoln’s firend,s and one of the GOOD ones at that, get a starring roll without him. HOpefully this keeps up and hopefully we see more of these two.

Saved by the Spell:

RUSTY SPOKES IS TRASH (Ring) I don’t have a saved by the spell font that’ll have to do. Point is he is but before we get to Rusty being Rusty, Lincoln is doing magic tricks at the table.

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Point is he’s excited to do it at the talent show. The next day his friends discuss doing something to make them look cool to everyone. WHich.. kids. i’ll level with you. You. are. NERDS. As a massive one in both size and nerdiness myself, there’s nothing wrong with that. 2/3 of you are lovely people. You’ll be fine. But you are geeks, and should be proud of that.. not so proud you evolve into an incel or it’s adjacent form of assholes mind you, but still proud of who you are. You are never going to be that cool by trying to appeal to everyone. Just be yourslef and the cool comes naturaly. Like kool aid, which is naturally made by milking the Kool Aid man. Be you.

But instead they decide to do a dance routine which.. let’s face it.. is probably just this spread across 6 people...

Point is maybe don’t do that. Also when Clyde does a dorky but endearing dance and says their going to shake their groove things, Rusty pipes in with “But cool”... and while sadly not as glorious as EVERYONE looking enitrely done with him like last time we saw this tool, Clyde clearly still does while the rest of hte Lincrew have no idea what the hell he’s on. I think their just.. numb to his stupidity and ego at this point. But when Lincoln shows off his magic they all hide him, fearing that magic.. is well for younger kids and this won’t play so well. Which isn’t an invalid fear: this is middle school and from personal experince, middle school can be hell.. and also one of hte best years of my life which shows the vast gulf between the two schools I was in but was also not the point. the point is kids can be cruel and maybe don’t do this. But lincoln gonna do it anyway because he has confidence.. and frankly given there was an ENTIRE episode about being yourself instead of putting on an asshole suit of armor to avoid being hurt, which Lynn finally took off again last episode, he’s right.. but the rest of them all feel THEIR ALL GOING TO LAUGH AT YOU. and since they don’t know if he has latent psychic powers or not can’t risk him getting pigs blood dumped on him so they plan to find some way to trick him out of it.. Clyde of course gets his stomach in nots because he’s not good with schemes or lying ot his best friend, both of which this is and requires.

Also Stella’s in the lead, as she should be. And she helps as her positive attudie makes what their doing come off as it should: KINDA douchey, but not intentionally so, they just worry about hteir freind getting pummled.. possibly by his own sister but now sh’es possibly with Liam that’s probably not as much of a worry. Or Chandler but frankly he’s going to do that no matter what.. and is probably getting his ass kicked himself by older kids who won’t toldeate his bs, so your clear. But their fears while a bit unfounded are understandable and well inteitoned if misguided, as we don’t know LIncoln’s act at this point or how well it’d go over with a mostly tweenager crowd, who can be the best as we’ve seen in recent tv.. or aboslutel monsters.. same deal. You either get Luz or you get BOscha, the inbetween is rare.

So cue our usual setup of a bunch of attempts to do something in a row, but like I said while i’m not a fan of reptition if it’s done well enough it works and with it’s rather sizeable supporting cast , LIncoln and Friends episodes usdually do make it work. In this case it does as each of the sensational 6, lincoln and clyde asid,e try their hand at it. Liam, being the golden child, just has the most direct and obvious route: swipe his magic stuff.. and runs off without letting them talk it out but unlike Rusty in the next attempt, his plan was actually viable.. he just gets tangled up in the scarves and taps out. Rusty is next ....and his idea is to.. show lincoln his killer dance moves to convince him normally.

Yup pretty much that. And somehow out of the four plans, RUSTY’S is the only one that dosen’t bring up any serious moral quandries. I know i’m shocked too. He just thinks his moves will do it when no they won’t, please stop it hurts to watch and I can’t turn the fuck away. This is my job you redheaded kanker sore! Gah it thankfully ends and is unsurisingly unsuccesful.

Also unsuprisingly, i’ve been waiting since i got that image to use it on Rusty. And as a third dollop of unsuprise I did not have to force it in any way shape or form. Point is it’s Zach’s turn as during the last two he’s been pushing really hard to use some form of brainwashing on his friend.. yes .. really.

Thought Rusty would be the first loud house character to get that one but hey if the shoe fits. Seriously I thought rusty was the creep among them but at least you know.. altering someone’s throughts to suit your own isn’t his go to move. Being excetsivly cocky and coming on too strong is but still better to take THAT out of the Zach Morris playbook than “brainwash people into dooing whatever you say because tha’ts not creeptagious.” And unsurpsingly it does not work.. on Lincoln it woroks on Meyrl for some reason. Thankfully it dosen’t though just.. Zach needs no power epsiecally over the mind.

So UNSUPRSINGLY, Stella has the working plnan.. and also unsuprisingly the last three just did theres by running off, running off and shouting the loudest. Again somehow Rusty is NO LONGER the most obnoxious one of the group. Zach won that title this episode. He’s still the most pathetic.. but i’m the most done with Zach who adds nothing to the dynamic or the planet or anything and I wish would just go away. Your home planet needs you.

But yeah Stella has the winning idea: pretending to be “Yodel Boy”, a student who was humilated at a talent show last year, proving sh’es not only a decent actress (I mean it’s obvious i’ts stella in a wig, padding and lederhosen, but points for the accent being okay and hey she’s in middle school), but also the smartest of them. Only one of those is a suprise. It works and Lincoln agrees.

So the night of the talent show they’ve caught him up to speed and prepare to celebrate, only for clyd eto open the wrong locker and reveal the yodel boy suit. WHy it was in there instead of at Stella’s house where this wouldn’t happen?

But yeah the cat’s out of the bag and lincoln leaves, depressed his friends think that little of him and lied to him. Which.. yeah completely fair. They tried talking to him, it did not work.. they shoudl’ve just left it at that. It would’ve SUCKED if he got bullied true, but it was his choice to go out there and take a risk and do what he loves. As someone whose constnatly self concious and had to fight to start writing like i’m doing now, I envy that kind of youthful confidence and thus wholly support him.

And finally.. so do his friends. Realizing they’ve been kinda crappy, they introduce lincoln instead and work as his assitants.. and.. it works. Stella gets sawn in half, Zach gets astounded by a card trick, and Liam wears a bunny outfit which is just.. precious. Good boy. Best boy. It’s a huge hit.. and we also get to seesome of the new background kids including one with pink hair who looks kinda nb. I’m just saying one of you should take a crack at them, they seem nice. But for now our heroes are haield as heroes, and the other 5 apologize to lincon and they do their now cemented and fucking adorable group hug. Happy ending to a pretty great episode, with decent gags, a good relatable plot, and Rusty being just the right amoutn of obnoxious. Good stuff. So that does it for this week. If you liked this review like or reblog it, check out my other work and come back later today for some duck content. and every week once the show returns. Until the next rainbow, it’s been a pleasure.

#the loud house #lincoln loud #stella zhau #clyde mcbride #lynn loud jr #liam honeycutt #who finally has a last name!#FINALLY #zach gurdle #rusty spokes #lucy loud #lisa loud #saved by the spell #the cow pie kid #animation #reviews #nickelodeon

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