#and anyways im in a weird emotional state right now

[sakebytheriver]

...

[heart2beom]

colon and a parenthesis

pairing: bestfriend!beomgyu x f!reader

genre: fluff, light hearted angst/comfort, best friends to ...lovers? drabble (an attempt), best friends who live together!!

synopsis: getting played has got to be the worst feeling ever. for you, you go through that heartbreak every other month. and now you're wailing on your best friend's shoulder again, for the hundredth time, ruining his hoodie. again.

a/n: "he doesn't deserve you" i'm such a basic bitch because the way i squeal over this line...was watching this show that is totally devoid of any romance subplot but i was okay with it because its a good show!! then this cute guy playing the best friend role just says this and im folding. like im being serious, i would've asked what we were. anyways ahahahahahaha, enjoy this as i slave myself into finishing my other bf2l beomgyu fic.

"Why do you look like that?"

You blink, processing his words before turning around, cereal box in hand. "What? What do I look like?" You pat your free hand around your face in attempt to figure out what incited that reaction. If it's an unwanted pimple, you're going to go insane.

Beomgyu huffs out a laugh through his nose, still eating his cereal. "I don't know, it's like you didn't get sleep for the past three decades."

He doesn't catch the roll of your eyes since he's focused on his phone, eating his breakfast but you still make sure to do it anyway. You pour the lucky charms in the bowl, the mention of your tired state gets you fighting the large grin overtaking your face. Reason?

You haven't slept a wink last night, inevitably a bad choice since you have morning classes, but digressing, it had to be the most magical of all nights. You recently got Mingi's number, the cute boy in your Music Comp class, who you've been notably crushing on for weeks.

Beomgyu knows this, obviously since you practically tell him everything, but what he doesn't know is that you've done some progression with your pining.

Other than the fact that he's cute, you find out he's also quite funny and witty, all throughout yesterday's overnight chat. Mingi's absolutely perfect. Like a prince charming. You don't even care that you have to spend extra time covering up your under eyes, it's what comes with the package that is Song Mingi.

You set your cereal on the kitchen island, sitting on the stool next to Beomgyu. Checking your phone for umpteenth time today, reading through the texts from last night still makes you smile a little too hard at the realization that yesterday night was in fact real.

You catch Beomgyu turning his head to you, brows furrowed like he was thinking of what to say, still chewing his food. "So?"

You lay your phone face down, "So what?"

"What happened?"

You realize he's talking about your dark circles. "Nothing, nothing happened. Was just studying all night," your eyes look up from your bowl of cereal to Beomgyu's doubtful eyes. "You know, pointing these things out to a woman is very disrespectful."

He laughs, and turns away shaking his head. Beomgyu was equally as tired looking so it wasn't like he had the right to make a comment. His ginger hair had strands poking out everywhere, dark circles even more evident under his eyes. It made sense, he worked late night shifts, and when he didn't, he'd stay up all night anyway, playing video games.

Yesterday he didn't have work, so you were very graciously blessed with having to hear his usual shenanigans through the walls of your room. He had an issue with keeping his emotions on the low when it came to games, which proved to be a nightmare. But thankfully, you were able to filter out his yelling with every response from Mingi.

"I heard you."

You furrow your brows, glancing to Beomgyu. "Huh? Heard what?"

He gets up, done with his breakfast, heading to the sink. "You were giggling all night. It was really weird," he mentions and your eyes widen, slowly chewing your food. Were you really that loud? How embarrassing. "Even weirder now that I know you were studying."

You throw your head back, groaning—of course he didn't buy your lie. "Beomgyu," you drawl.

"No, no, if you wish to keep your life private, keep it private." He was faking his hurt, but you also know there's some truth to it. Sharing things with each other, with no filter, has always been a staple to your relationship. And it's not like you were the type to be private anyway, so it worked out in the end.

"We were texting all night," you start, the dreamy vision of his face clouds your mind as your eyes sparkle at the thought, "Me and Mingi."

Beomgyu halts, his back faced to you— you don't read too much into it before he finally turns around. "Mingi as in... Music Comp Mingi?"

You flutter your lashes, nodding, barely biting down your smile. "He's a total A-plus heartthrob." you swoon.

Beomgyu lays his forearm on the countertop, standing across of you, tilting his head and a scrunch of his face like he’s willing to debate on that. "Yeah, but didn't Yeonjun happen like, two months ago?"

Yeonjun. The upperclassman you dated for six entire months, probably your longest relationship ever. Which is a little sad, at least for a sophomore in college. The added duration of your relationship made the breakup sting a lot more, as well as the fact that you wholeheartedly believed you'd end up marrying him at some point in the future.

Your smile droops, gaze fallen to the sad looking soggy cereal. "Hey, no, I mean, Y/N I'm just worried, but if you're—if you're over him, Mingi is good for you!" You slowly look up at Beomgyu, and you manage a smile on one end of your lips.

"You think so? Mingi's pretty nice, right?"

He huffs out a laugh through his nose again, he's been doing it a lot more often. "You stayed up all night talking to him, you're in love with him."

You break into a smile, eyes back on your spoon. "Shut up."

He points an accusatory finger, "Your ears just got red, oh my god, you are in love with him!"

You roll your eyes, quickly adjusting your hair to cover your ears. He shakes his head in awe, "You're actually hopeless."

"I'm sorry that he's literally the reincarnation of a prince charming. I can't help it."

"You say that about everyone." That was half true. You never said it about Sunwoo. "Anyways, you guys made plans, right?"

You fall quiet, eyes widening before quickly breaking eye contact with Beomgyu, clearing your throat. A few beats of silence and before you know it, Beomgyu grabs your phone, and is typing in your passcode.

You jump off your seat, "Beomgyu! Don't text him! I swear to god—" You have always made a mental note to change your passcode, but your memory fails you each time. And now you're bearing the consequences.

It quickly turns into a game of cat and mouse the more you go after him—each time, he's directly across from you as he focuses on typing as quickly as he could. Even when you calculate to run the opposite direction, Beomgyu is faster, quickly having the kitchen's island in between you both again.

"Mingi, the love of my life, I proposition you with a date at Gorae's—" he announces aloud, reading off the screen.

You rush to his side in his moment of weakness, reaching to grab your phone but Beomgyu's quick to react, raising his arm high enough for you to struggle to get your phone. God darn his height.

"Give me my phone you ass!"

"—and I want to marry you and have nine babies with you in a cottage far away from the world, my love!"

If he sent that, you'd jump off the balcony of your flat. No doubt. So, you attack him with your most effective weapon.

"And—shit. Oh my god, oh my god Y/N—" He wheezes, he's calm drowsiness dissipating, and he's quick to retreat, hands shielding themselves from your evil fingers. But you don't stop, a mischievous smile breaching your lips, because god is it fun to be the one to tease for once.

You aim for his sides, unprotected and perfect for your fingers to start tickling. His giggles are boisterous as he weakly attempts to stop your hands, but you don't let, "Punishment for being a little bitch."

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry— oh my god, have mercy!" he manages to muster between his fit of laughter.

His contagious laugh bubbles one up from you until you hear a ping, and you realize that he might've actually sent that in! In horror, you grab your phone from Beomgyu's loose hold, who was still attempting to calm his laugh down, wiping under his waterline.

You check your messages, and it's in fact one from Mingi. "Beomgyu! Did you actually send him something?" you yell anxiously, eyes wide.

You don't give him time to respond, deciding to rip the bandaid, clicking on your chat. Hesitantly you read the messages after the 'goodnight' you've sent yesterday.

Your brows crease flatten as you read the two messages Beomgyu sent.

"I had fun talking. Maybe we should hang sometime?" you look up from your phone, "Who says that?"

He shrugs, wiping his hand on his sweats, "Probably, I don't know, sane people. What'd he say?"

You smile, looking back at the text Mingi had sent in response. "I'd like that. He'd like that. With a smiley face."

A conflicting smile is on his face as he says, "He'd like that with a smiley face?"

You roll your eyes, it's a terrible attempt at a joke, "A smiley face. Colon and a closing parenthesis."

He lets out an oh of realization as if he truly did not know, nodding. "Good luck, thank me when the wedding happens." he comments, walking into the living room you think— you don't really care. Too far gone as you re-read three simple words. And a colon paired with a closing parenthesis.

You really wish it'd work out this time.

—------------------------------

You don't exactly remember when you started to consider Beomgyu to be one of, if not, your closest friend.

The time he had stayed on a call with you throughout the entire night, on a school night, falling asleep after the spell of drowsiness won against both of your wills to continue talking? It magically seemed like you could endlessly talk, about anything, everything and nothing at the same time, with Beomgyu.

The time your eyes miracally found each other, in heaps of awkward situations? Like when you both ended up being third wheels to your pining friends, or when a party seemed too much for comfort.

Or when Beomgyu confided to you that he spent days learning makeup through lengthy youtube tutorials to help you out with applying it for prom?

Maybe the time you celebrated your graduation by choosing to invite over Beomgyu's family? No, you think it's probably the time you realized the only person you thought of when meaning to ask someone to move in with you—possibly the biggest next life step— was none other than your goofy, sort of odd, friend.

Or maybe it's now.

When you open the door, a heavish Beomgyu with his chest rising and falling, like he just ran a marathon, iris darting quickly going over your state before crashing you straight into his embrace, a hand gently on the back of your head. "I'm here."

You were holding it before he showed up, really holding it. But the warmth of Beomgyu's body against yours is enough for you to break. Your shoulders shake as you silently sob onto Beomgyu's, and his hold on you loosens, the previous panic slowing as he pat your back soothingly.

You knew Beomgyu, he's always been hyper aware of feelings, his own and others. This time, he set aside his own to make it easier for you to let out yours—you always notice when he does this.

His breathing is unstable against your hair, still attempting to catch it. "Why are you here? Don't you have work?" your words come out as a muffle, especially with the way your head is buried against his hoodie.

"You called, idiot."

"I called to ask if you could get milk on your way." You were in the mood for hot chocolate, your comfort drink, but to your absolute dismay, there was no milk. And you strongly preferred your hot chocolate with milk.

Beomgyu only hums in acknowledgement as if to say, yes, you're correct. You did only ask him to get milk.

Your emotions are one of a rollercoaster, once again sobbing like a child, before you pull your head away slowly, sniffling as you look up at him, your hands still wrapped around his waist. "You called in sick?"

His silence makes you feel uneasy, he could just say yes. Or no. Your brows raise. "Did you just ...run out?" you yell, almost pulling away from him completely, but he has senses for things like this —quickly pulling your head into his chest again. You groan.

"Now's not the time to lecture me." he mumbles into your hair.

After a little thinking, you decide to not fight him, giving in to his embrace. You could talk to him about his rash decision skills later, now, you want to be a little more selfish.

You're not sure where it went wrong with Mingi, and you don't really want to think about it. Your lips tremble against the soft fabric, more tears spilling down your cheeks, snot running.

"Can I blow my nose?" you ask. Beomgyu's a tinge hesitant before he just sighs. "Be gross all you want."

It felt like eternity standing there, in front of your door, Beomgyu's hand wrapped around you, and yours around his. He doesn't ask questions, he only stays silent unless you said something first. Usually saying incoherent things about Mingi, how you thought it'd end well, how he was everything to you, your moon, the sun that shone brightly. All through the occasional hiccups and sniffles of your crying session.

"I swear, Mingi—"

Suddenly Beomgyu exhales, his hands falling from your back to pull your head away from his chest. You guess it isn't a pretty look, with your bloodshot eyes, and gross snot messy on your face. But he doesn't hesitate to rub a thumb over your cheek.

"You know he doesn't deserve a minute of your time, Y/N. He doesn't deserve you. Like at all."

You furrow your brows. You don't believe a word. "You've barely met him, how would you know that I don't deserve him? And he realized that, which is why—"

He cuts your self wallow of deprecation off with a violent shake of his head. "Stupid. I've met you. I know you. That's enough information for me to make judgement."

"That's..." tears well up in your waterline again before you bury your head in his hoodie again, "That's so cheesy Beomgyu. Thank you."

You can feel his smile, somehow, it's like you're both connected by a string. "I'm serious, you're the best person I know. Flaws? Everyone has them, you do too, but you're ...still somehow the best person I know. If Mingi can't see that— if, impossibly, no one else can see that, then they don't deserve you. You know that?"

You nod meekly, soaking up his words. Millions of things could be said in response, something that could tell him how much highly you think of him too, but the dry of your throat prevents you from so.

"Tell me a joke." you say instead.

He ponders a bit before landing on one. "Can I be the parenthesis to your colon?"

You look up at him, silent, before you weakly hit his chest, laughing. When Mingi asked you to be his girlfriend, he said those exact words, and you had came home, raving all about it to Beomgyu, even though deep down, you found it a little ...too cheesy for your taste.

Beomgyu held the same opinion, except he was vocal about it. Making fun of the line for an entire weeks worth.

"Too soon."

He scratches the back of his head, a sorry smile on his face, "Yeah?"

You don't know if this breakup would be worse than the one you had with Yeonjun—only time could tell. All you knew was that no matter what it'd feel like—hell, like you were walking on pins and needles, like drowning in hot soup; Beomgyu would be by your side. That alone is enough, something that reminded you that this feeling would go away eventually.

ending a/n: you're done!! this might have to be considered the longest proclaimed drabble ever lol (2.6k words this is not a drabble) but anyways, like always, thoughts are appreciated.

[nerves-nebula]

Knowing that he has memory problems does neglected Raph struggle to trust his own judgment?

Like not even just for things gaps in memories makes sense to hinder. I’m talking even when he knows stuff or when memory doesn’t factor in at all, he knows he can’t trust his mind on some things so he struggles to trust it at all

If so, does he ever recover from all that?

(Side note: it’d be super interesting to see them face a villain like Mother May-Eye from Teen Titans 2003)

here's the thing about raph, Raph doesn't trust ppl other than his brothers, april, and casey, so he wouldn't let someone else fact check him, but that doesn't mean he doesn't doubt his own memories. especially since Donnie has rambled at length about how fallible memories are.

There more than a few times where Raph has a memory of something, but Splinter kind of tweaks it or implies it was just ever so slightly different in away that changes things. and if Raph is like "wait that's not what happened" Splinter would imply he doesn't know what he's talking about. never calling him crazy outright, just saying he's remembering it wrong. but isn't it kind of weird that, for some reason, Raph's memory is always "wrong" in a way that benefits Splinter? (Mom Reference)

so anyway, Raph doesn't like being told he remembered something wrong cuz of that, so that's why he only lets his close friends check him and might get aggro if someone he doesn't know well casually implies he's remembering something wrong. (this includes stuff as small as someone saying "i think you remembered this wrong" or "that's not what I remember" even just really small stuff like that can trigger him)

But his defensiveness is just because he does genuinely worry that since he forgets things so much, there's a chance the solid memories he DOES have aren't real. and if that's true then like what is he even doing, right? like how can he be a person in a meaningful way if the things his internal experiences and emotions are based on aren't real? That's what he thinks, at least.

i watched the mother may-eye episode to answer this ask so im gonna address that under the cut now:

I forgot how good the teen titans theme song is. also i forgot about the hive five they're are so fucking cool i wish i was every character in this show wtf. also why that guy sexually harass starfire. kinda like that starfire appears to swear all the damn time but since it's alien swears no one cares.

and the DAY is SAVED by the power of THATS NOT HOW CONCUSSIONS WORKS <3 my favorite storytelling technique tbh. just hit 'em on the head i'm sure it'll work out fine.

SLUR in early 2000's children media: OBSERVED.

really fucked up that they gave it to the Hive Five not knowing if they were gonna escape or get baked or anything. that's. wild.

there's something about a villain who forcibly makes you regress to a childlike state in order to manipulate you that is so fucking uncomfortable, oh my god. especially when they use, like, overly cutesy language. if i did something like that to the neglected gang it would be really gross. so i might do that later then, idk.

[rathayibacter]

raths ttrpg post

hey yall im rath and welcome to games

im a ttrpg designer and enthusiast who’s been making games since they were a little kid, but only started sharing them with the wider internet around 2019. gonna be sharing a lot more about them in the coming days and weeks as I transition away from twitter being my primary braincrime dumping ground, but I figured to start us off I should share what I’ve currently got for those curious.

if you’ve got any questions or comments, hit me up! I’m always down to talk and listen about games and game design. anyway, without further ado,

first up weve got Disparateum, my weird baby. Disparateum is a game about perspective and identity, set in a city where all possible interpretations of reality exist overlaid on top of one another. if you’ve ever wanted to play a game about wandering through a fractal museum-labyrinth, stealing stories from genre-manifested dragon gods, and running from a cruel man wielding a copy of the role-playing game Disparateum as his ultimate weapon, this is the game for you. currently the first of three Acts is out, comprising forty or so pages, but more is coming.

next up is [BXLLET>, my most hacked game by a long shot. it’s a post-apocalyptic cowboy game about reckoning with the purpose and nature of violence in a world struggling to rebuild itself. the core of the game is simple: bullets are your xp mechanic, but you can also spend a bullet to kill anyone at any time, so in terms of both power and threat bullets are most valuable when not being shot. there’ve been two really successful BXLLET jams, here and here. give the contributors lots of love, they’ve really made some amazing stuff with my humble little pew pew game.

next we’ve got Charcuterie, a collection of smaller, messier projects and prototypes. there’s two volumes of it out right now (vol i and vol ii), and I’m currently messing with the third (which is likely gonna be all poetry and short stories, so look forward to that!)

lastly I’ll list KATABASIS, which I’m slowly putting together a major revision for. it’s a surreal dungeon crawl set in a Brutalist overgrown-concrete afterlife, where you play dead spirits trying to fight their way back to life using weapons and equipment formed from their emotional baggage. in its current state it’s pretty rusty, but if you do decide to take the leap and pick it up you’ll get all future updates for free.

if you’re still hungry for more, I’ve got even more stuff on my itch page, though this covers all the significant projects I’ve released in the last three or so years. thanks for reading this far, hope you find something you enjoy!

oh yeah and, everything listed here has community copies on their itch pages, but I’m also down to send download links to anyone who requests em, no questions asked.

[cannibalslut]

Cannibalism and Kabru? Interesting. I wonder how he would do with such thing, considering that he’s most likely traumatized by seeing people from his home village being devoured by monsters…

Anyways, I wanted to ask this for a while now:

So, what are your ideas for this ship? What is your s/i like? How did she and Kabru meet? What is the dynamic? What role does cannibalism plays? Just, I’m dying to know what is going on.

Fun fact: I myself have been eyeing Kabru before properly watching Dungeon Meshi, suspecting that I might get a crush on him. But then shit happened, and here I am, obsessing over Thistle instead... Kabru is still cool, though. I especially love how the manga shows that him lying to manipulate people has consequences, so now he has to supress his honest emotions and do things he doesn’t want to do. It’s hilarious, I have never seen it done anywhere before.

(By the way, I’ve seen many people joke about being disappointed by Kabru being a man because they though he was a beautiful butch woman. Thoughts on that?)

– villain-in-love

so sorry to say… the cannibalism is mostly symbolic…. 😔 it’s like sentiments of “i want to eat you” and sexual biting and like. heavy cannibalism allusion used in smut. that kind of thing. kabru i think wouldnt be able to stomach survival cannibalism much less pleasure cannibalism like hes not that kind of guy. cath is a different story.

speaking of cath shes my s/i. her name is Catherine Entrailé she’s fantasy french (unfortunately, that was just too good a name…) and she’s a vulture beastman (were-vulture?). she can shift between human and vulture forms and was cursed to be this way (like izutsumi). she needs to turn fully into a vulture every so often or suffers consequences, she disappears from the party for a few days at a time and they notice a vulture following them, etc etc…

i havent decided who cursed her shes still a fledgling character. likewise i dont know how cath and kabru met (shes in his party) and suggestions would be appreciated lol. i am thinking of giving her a dead sister or something as backstory.

also, as backstory, she has past trauma from being poisoned, so she has to know EXACTLY whats in her food at all times. she eats carrion because its one flesh with no extra ingredients. this sets up conflict with senshi bc nooo why are you putting extra things in my food are you going to poison me!! so she’s like izutsumi bc they’re both picky eaters. she and izutsumi would either get along like a house on fire Or become lifelong mortal enemies. also there might be an arc there about growing past it because shes a vulture now and can digest many toxins without being harmed.

i think thats probably all i have for her for right now, hopefully i can come up with more stuff soon~ i know her dynamic with kabru, though. the reason why she’s in the dungeon is because she’s a murderhobo actually. she’s like kabru in that she hates monsters, but she hates Literally Everything Else too and thinks all humans should die. if she doesnt kill things in the dungeon she will start doing it on the surface. kabru is worried by and captivated by her weird psychology. they also hook up before he realizes she’s a beastman bc she keeps it well hidden. after he realizes he fucked a girl thats part monster he gets so upset it gives him cramps. i still dont know how to get over this obstacle lol i do not think kabru wants to be shipped with a demihuman. sucks for him bc im doing it anyway hes my little toy 🤍

other assorted thoughts: cath heavily enables kabru’s desires and they have like hungry hands-everywhere can’t-get-enough-of-your-body-sex, laios is the reason why cath became more comfortable telling people she’s a beastman and existing in an state between human and vulture (kabru wants to kill himself so bad rn), tension between rin and kabru and cath happens where rin absolutely despises cath bc kabru wont give her attention but will give cath attention. cath kind of doesnt care about rin too much bc shes aro/polyam like me. if they one sided hatefuck it will go nuclear and tear the party apart.

anyways to the rest of your ask! yes kabru is such an interesting and unique character! i like how hes shown as sympathetic and with good intentions but has some very worrying traits like what is up with his freaky stare when he straight up executes those guys? and when he attacks falin? and also the way his trauma affects him is pretty well done. sometimes he reminds me of light yagami but better lol. he also does take it upon himself who gets to live and die based on a moral framework of “some humans are irredeemable vermin that must be removed” but he’s actually a likeable character and DOES NOT have a god complex. my poor little fucked up guy im gonna use him

i never thought kabru was a butch woman but sometimes i wish he was 😔 though i’ve been doing surprisingly well with the idea of him as a cis man. it pisses me off a little bit that he and cath are m/f and both cis. at least hes bisexual. usually my s/is are lesbian but i cant do that here lol. ALTHOUGH i was thinking genderfluid or crossdresser kabru maybe inspired by ryuko kui’s r63 art (Manipulative Girlfriend kabru you will always be famous) plus this tweet: https://x.com/bedtimecreature/status/1768118459693682865?t=2IniV5ZjNZ9m-fdhHU-Vcg&s=19 idk he just looks really good here man i love him. (i dont hc him as transmasc tho)

this is getting long lol so i think ill end it here. hey i got it in earlier than “in the next week”! thanks for reminding me i had to write this haha

[smute]

Charlie goes to his crusty bedroom and reads his precious Moby-Dick essay one more time while glugging from a two-liter bottle of bed-Pepsi. We get to hear his favorite part of the essay: “The whale doesn’t have any emotions, he’s just a poor big animal.” As a fat person who has actually read Moby-Dick, even the “boring chapters,” THAT IS NOT WHAT MOBY-DICK IS ABOUT OR WHAT MOBY DICK THE WHALE IS LIKE AT ALL. Obviously we’re supposed to draw some parallel between Moby Dick the actual whale and Charlie the human whale, but, like, why? What shallow fucking bullshit! Can you even map one on top of the other at all? Has anyone ever read Moby-Dick and thought, “wow, what a pathetic loser” about the whale? The ungraspable phantom of life himself???? Thin people don’t think of fat people as powerful and inscrutable phantoms—they’re absolutely positive they can scrute everything about us, our “everything” being CHEESY BUGLES! Hence this movie!!!!! Don’t talk about my favorite book, DARREN. I don’t come to your house and explain The Mystery Method wrong! Anyway, then Charlie uses his cursed rusty mobility aids to turn out the light and go to sleep. Spooky!

[...] How do fat suits work? Does Brendan Fraser have to wear individual little sausage tubes on each finger? I can’t stop thinking about how many awards the visual effects people (or whatever department makes fat suits) are going to win for this. It’s like if I got a Nobel Prize for drawing a mean picture of your grandma. Also, for the record, I know the fat suit was really expensive, but it looks weird! It doesn’t hang right! He looks like the mascot for an NBA team called the Wichita Big Pile of Raw Chicken. Hmm, if only there was a way to depict a fat person in a movie without an expensive flappy silicon slug bag!

While Charlie is in the bathroom crying (really), Thomas shows up again and Ellie introduces herself: “What’s more surprising—that a gay guy has a daughter, or that someone actually found his penis?” Wow, once again, thank you so much to Darren Aronofsky and playwright Samuel D. Hunter for spending TEN YEARS on this extremely humanizing screenplay! I feel seen, unlike my own genitals!!!

Charlie is so moved that he goes, “You wrote these amazing, honest things… You’ve all been so honest with me. I just want to be honest with you too.” And then he TURNS ON HIS WEBCAM and SHOWS THEM HIS HUGE FACE AND BODY! All the students lose it and they’re grimacing and cowering before him and taking pictures of the screen, LOL, even though literally it just looks like a regular guy???????? It’s a Zoom square! It looks like a close-up of a guy’s face! No one would have any reaction to this! If there’s one thing this movie does perfectly, it’s trick thin people into telling on themselves about how uncomfortable they are around fat people!

Then Liz comes back and reveals that, LMAO, what happened to Alan is that he starved himself to death (kind of), and that’s why now Charlie has to EAT himself to death. Wooooooow, who wrote that brilliant juxtaposition? Grover??? Is this supposed to be profound? It's less nuanced than when people say “the terrorists hate our freedom”! Actually, you know what? This detail with Alan is the central problem with this entire movie: Being thin is not the opposite of being fat!!!!!!!! STARVING IS NOT THE OPPOSITE OF EATING. Having a body is a complex state! [...] Then they clarify that actually Alan starved himself ALMOST to death and then jumped off a bridge. Jumping! The most thin-privilege way to die!

sorrynotsorry bout all the whale poasting but this review by lindy west was very cathartic for me! its a shitty movie and extremely triggering not just for fat people but anyone with any sort of complicated feelings around food and your own body tbh. so im sharing it here. butt news has a free subscription and lindy west is hilarious so. go read it and maybe read some other reviews too

[your-queer-dad]

hey dad, its me again with everything going on the world is really scary right now... I thank you for every ask you answer, especially those on this topic personally ive been increadibly agoraphobic since we added a really bad pick of a partner to our Poly a year ago, but have since escaped the living situation that included them... long story short, im having a lot of trouble trusting others, between the state of the world right now, my own personal situation that ive mentioned on these asks already, and some welling up feelings for some friends who i want to add to my romantic situation, im in a lot of confusing headspace right now... I have a lot of advice I want to ask for, and alot of needs I have that I dont know how to meet, but overall i just dont feel safe and stable regularly... amnesia doesnt help either, cant lie about that... I told our bio dad about what the therapist said... he doesnt know what to make of it, and honestly i havent had a good track record of him understanding me anyway... so I tend to come here when I want that comfort... you do a lot for all of us! thank you! anyway I think I need to go cry now just to release some emotions so ill end my rant here Loves you DAD! -your daughter Zimmy

PS: any parenting advice? one of our headmates is really small, and our situation is weird so i thought id ask ♥

Hey kiddo!! I completely understand how things can feel so scary and overwhelming. And it's okay to be scared. But I promise you as horrible as the world can seem, there's always goods. I'm glad that I'm able to help and I'm always here for you any time you need it kiddo! And as for parenting advice, is there anything in particular you'd like advice on? 🫂🫂

- dad x

[linzerj]

Me realizing I haven't actually posted any new art of my OCs in almost 2 years-

Anyway I'm entering Liz in the @smallartistocbracket ! Here's a quick masterpost:

Its the girl! Elizabeth "Liz" Turner was my first OC, made almost 13 years ago at this point? (2010 was some of the first art I did of her wow...) She's undergone lots of design changes and backstory updates/edits. Originally a Danny Phantom and Teen Titans crossover OC, Liz currently exists in a weird limbo state of me trying to figure out how she and her friends' stories can work in a totally separate universe. She and my other OCs were designed as a hero team, so im kinda just... trying my best to figure them out at this point lol.

Most of her backstory is unchanged - she and her parents were all victims of a terrible car crash. But while her parents passed on, Liz got stuck behind as a ghost. As she tries to figure out what to do with herself now, Liz discovers her electic-based powers; meets a gargoyle named Violet, two super-powered girls named Carmen and Brianna, and normal-girl-who-accidentally-got-roped-into-their-problems Laella; and becomes the emotional backbone of their little hero team. But don't let her cheery outward personality fool you - its all a cover for her PTSD from the accident and losing her parents and old life. She does such a good job she even convinces herself she's fine for a long time, but she does eventually recognize it's all a mask and seeks some professional therapy.

(AAAHHH tumblr why didn't you save the rest of this - heck. I'll try and add back what tumblr has lost...)

Liz, being a ghost, kind of... doesn't age. And cant die. And so.... she has. A bit of an existential crisis as time goes on, and her friends start passing on...

(Left: young, optimistic Liz, about 5 years after dying, and 4 years after she met all her friends. She'd be about 23-24, if she were alive. Right: older, tired Liz, about 100 or more years later.)

Liz is notorious for using her ghostly powers for pranks when she's younger. But invisibility, intangibility, and flight make for a great combo for spooking people - with harmless intentions of course!

But her main power is electricity, or lightning - because her ghost 'core' is electric-based, due to the environment (stormy conditions) when she died. She can generate small static shocks or devastating lightning bolts - she can act as a lightning rod, redirect or absorb electricity, make ball lightning or a lightning wall-shield - and she can even act as an AED in an emergency, after learning finer control.

(Fun fact: her hero name was originally Storm. Because in 2010 I had somehow not seen X-Men, and didn't know about Storm... currently, she has no hero name, as I haven't yet thought of a new one.)

I definitely had more, but can't recall what tumblr deleted ... so, here's some more pics of Liz! And links to the spotify playlists I made for her too.)

[okamiwind]

hm here's an update on how i've been doing

i went on a band trip last week that took a lot out of me emotionally, but it was fun also? sometimes life is weird like that. like maybe you had something annoying happen to you but then that annoyance leads to a bitch session that leaves you closer to someone else, maybe in a way that you wouldn't have known before. so idk. good and bad. you're just supposed to have both, i guess.

as i've been away, i haven't been writing much besides paradisium. paradisium, despite only requiring 500 words a day, sometimes feels like a real slog. i dont think i had a super clear idea of the middle of this story, so trying to figure it out is a challenge.

now that i'm thinking about it, a lot of my stories start that way? i have a very clear beginning point, a very clear end point, and the middle is like jeremy bearimy. like how do you unravel a knot that was tied in the fabric of time? you cant, of course. you just try and hack away at it with a butter knife

summer pretty much started for me last week as i don't follow the calendar dates for seasons. seasons should be entirely Vibes based. so anyway summer started last week and i can't wait for it to be over. counting down the days pretty much.

i'm not really looking forward to my birthday, but it will be pretty cool to hopefully be finished paradisium by then. lets all put our hands together in prayer.

oh yeah. i was gonna say... today i started writing iatbye again after an extended absence and tiana happened to catch me with a call in the middle of it (usually i write in blocks of 1k, so i think of .5 as my halfway point). as i was talking to her i was like man, this is a terrible time to talk to me because all my thoughts are completely absurd and strange and weird, like i told her that the horse is a metaphor and she's like yeah of course it is and then i explained the metaphor at her for 5 minutes and then the next 5 minutes i told her about my anxieties about the next two chapters for iatbye and why that's probably contributed to my lack of energy to write it

yeah chapter 12 is like, the climax of this part. the way that chapter 17 and 25 were those big emotional moments for part one, chapter 12 will be the emotional centerpiece of part two. so it's like. you know, i'm sure it will be fine, and truthfully it doesn't matter if it sucks bc im not being graded and its just for fun, whatever whatever, but at the same time, i have these Standards TM for myself that i almost certainly can't live up to. so its worrisome. you can write things a thousand different ways, and i have to try to write it the Right way. so i worry over it.

sidlink is still on the backburner. i know in some way or another what i wanna do with that fic but its just too wide open right now for me. i need to finish an iatbye chapter to like. get back into my groove. get some confidence back or something.

so idk. that's how i am now mostly. i mostly exist in a state of depressed (and i mean that in the squashed sort of depressed way, not big sad kind of depressed way) anxiety. like most of the time i can deal with it but then ill get hit with this wave that just like waterboards me lmao

[savrenim]

i saw your post about anime bullshit vs ifmlam and can i just say im so glad you're having so much fun writing? i discovered you through ifmlam but i've been shoving your other fics and patreon and original stuff straight into my mouth because i love your style and knowing that you're having a good time even with the fic that definitely comes from a Different Time Of Your Life is just. really cool idk

aaaaah thank you so much!!!! 

yeah it's really fun and funny looking at my writing over both short and long time frames because there's so much of me stamped in? like there are the tiny things like sometimes when I'm lazy coming up with idiosyncrasies for characters (everything from "I'm going to give you my coffee order" to "I'm going to give you my childhood hyperfixation with volcanoes"*) to obviously with my fanfiction there is the Piece Of Fiction I Was Obsessed With At The Time but also a lot of the original fiction that I have I can pinpoint the setting influences and vibe influences of both stories that I liked but also Other Things That Were Going On In My Life and it just kind of feels like my whole body of work traces my emotional state and the things I was excited about and loved and hated in weird subtle ways and I really like that, the same way that like. the playlists that I've made and listen to on repeat for months at a time have. 

and it also kind of feeds into most of my projects are multi-year projects to ever finish but I never really try to build them around the expectation that I'll feel the same way for a decade, I build them around feelings that I know will be meaningful time capsules? like the way that I choose tattoos: as things that will mean something to me because they represent something important that I felt, not that I feel 

and I guess I'm really glad that I'm in a space where ifmlam is actually exciting to me again, bc it was something that was a huge positive to me for so long and it was a piece of work that not only am I really proud of what I'd written but there are so many upcoming parts that I'm even prouder of and I'm really glad that I never gave up and posted the outline of the rest of it bc it is fun to look back on who I was and how I wrote and take a break from who I am and what I've been doing for the last 5-6 years and return to a previous place both with what's changed and what hasn't. it's nostalgic and it feels right. I think I needed the break but also never needed to throw out the baby with the bathwater and I'm glad that I didn't. and like. maybe I'm having Emotions bc my life is Changing right now faster and more drastically than it ever has before and I think vastly for the better? but boy is it Emotions.

anyways this is a long and rambly way of saying that yeah, ifmlam is officially coming back; there are 2130 words of the next chapter (and oops a bit of a life update) on my patreon right now, and whether or not the patreon keeps voting for that as my open work to guarantee my working on it, I think enough momentum is built up that a new chapter will be posted-posted in like. 3ish months tops? and I'm loathe to make predictions about my life given how unpredictable my life is being right now but maybe possibly it's getting to a place where ifmlam is back on a "sporadic every few months updates" track rather than a "several years of hiatus in between new chapter drops" track???? but I guess we'll see. I'm really having a fun time letting my patreon vote on stuff bc while "wait for inspiration to strike for any given project" is a fun way to do things, I've also realized that I've got so many multi-year projects to finish that crowdsourcing some of what I'm working on makes me feel like I'm making progress on things that matter rather than stalling out on everything bc it's all going at once 

although also speaking of next few months and things no longer stalling even with it being The Most Anime Bullshit thing I've ever written GODS am I excited for Opus I and I think that one's also???? coming really soon??????? as in only a few months??????????

*neither of these have appeared yet in anything published please no one waste time pouring through everything I've ever published to try to find these examples

[cassandragemini]

invitation to infodump about your ocs 👍 if you want a specific prompt: what is the Big Change that drives their story? how does it affect them?

i got this ask last night and wrote like 80% of this right before bed and then i fell asleep and then i forgot about it until right now i got home for the day. Whoops

misha getting turned into a werebear and tseren witnessing her extremely painful was the thing that kinda permanently altered their relationship forever and give tseren a weird complex about trying to protect misha however he can but their main shared Story Defining Event was tseren stabbing his fiancé out of pure desperation a couple days before his parents were going to make him marry a man. misha willingly chose to stay by his friends side and the two of them left everything they’d ever known in the middle of the night. and the catalyst for the current state of their relationship was a slowly developing Category 5 Lesbian Situationship Event that lead to a major fight after misha suddenly realized that some unspoken resentment and other things had lead to them developing some weird codependency issues that were slowly beginning to severely straintheir relationship. she tried confronting tseren about it and telling him that maybe they possibly might need some distance but tseren has 30 million billion abandonment issues so he perceived that as his friend suddenly being hostile for no reason and he reacted Poorly to say the least. the ensuing massive argument ended with misha just telling him that she wouldnt talk to him until he finally got his shit together and stopped acting like a fucking child and she just walked out and left for several months which was the most time theyd spent without each other Ever. any time i mention the oomf divorce this is what im talking about. anyway the much needed distance (although misha would later admit that the amount of time was a bit harsh) and later reconciliation after months of not seeing each other was what allowed them both to finally start untangling their emotions a bit and get slightly more normal so after a Lot of talking between two butches who are not good at verbalizing their emotions theyre bffs again. and later this lead to them both slowly independently realizing that unrealized romantic feelings had bled into their relationship a very long time ago and had been one of the things causing more strain

lou has 2 major Events, getting framed for a murder he didnt commit, and being bitten by a werewolf but im actually currently debating changing the order those events happened. initially i wrote that he got bit and started doing odd and questionable legal jobs to try to make a living while constantly being on the move to avoid being found out . However. the alternative idea im tossing around rn is that he was framed but saw an opportunity to run for it while being transported to jail. he got chased and had to make the split second decision between getting caught by lawmen or run into a dangerous section of the woods and he choose the woods and did end up getting lightly chewed by something in the dark but its fine he walked it off (he stumbled onto some random persons porch and fainted from blood loss right then and there)

unlike everyone else adelitas life is great actually. she just started traveling and living as a human thief cause she wanted to see the world and have fun. as a kid she saw a wanted poster for some cool looking outlaw and decided "I WANT TO DO THAT" and one day as an adult she got bored and decided to finally commit to her larping dreams

[superemeralds]

🌷How will they deal with saying goodbye?

👯‍♀️How often do they see the others? Their other friends, too?

🖤Free space! Ask what you like, or request a random headcanon

<- hit us with your weirdest shot?

🌷shadow and omega b oth have very complicated relationships w the concept of good bye. they don't really age or die? omega specifically has the advantage of having very limited emotion and a highly logic mind, so he would not waste energy mourning and accept when things end. Shadow is def still trying to figure it all out. as of rn in universe ofc he doesn't have to think abt it much yet, he's doing his best to prevent his friends from harm right now, and he'd rather just face the problems as they happen. especially in shth he learned that theres no use thinking about the what ifs, because there's a right now that needs to be dealt with. the more he thinks about what differenciates him from others the less he can concentrate on what matters: the things he's got in common. like the ground beneath their feet, the star they orbit around, the wind that blows in their faces... He knows about the inevitability of death enough through maria, and he will try his best to not make the same mistake twice. he's determined to move on. ofc its easier said than done, especially in the conceptual event that rouge would fall in combat or even worse.. because of a mistake that he made.. but there are so many possibilities that i could analyze we'd be here for ever.........

rouge herself i think hasdealt with loss before, and she might have had some history with people that she has cut out of her lives. it might seem cold but i think she as a person has mastered the art of severing. whether its healthy is not the question rn... she def has a very soft spot for shadow and omega, tho as stated above these two are really hard to kill so there's not much to worry about in that regard, if anything it's a worry that might not plague her right now, but eventually she's going to think about what it means to be the one that's being severed by forces beyond anyone's control

anyways i dont wanna get existential this morning so this is where i stop

👯‍♀️I headcanon rouge has some friends she regularly meets in her bar (i'll let it be open if it actually belongs to her or if she's just a regular) and she would def visit knuckles every now and then. not saying she'd like. actually talk to him tho. might just lurk in a bush and stare at the master emerald

omega is a tough one to think about tbh. i admittedly don't have too many thoughts on him outside of being part of the team... this is telling me i need to dig more into his individual character tbh. what would he do for fun? when not with the otehr two?? Maybe he actually is like a gamer playing shooters and made friends in voice chat. no one believes him when he introduced himself as killermachine, they think its just a nickname

shadow likes solitude, but i really like that one bit in the recent twitter take over where he and knuckles stood in the forest for hours watching the plants and animals and hwo the light changes throughout the day while going through the leaves etc etc... theyre both very connected to nature in their own ways and i think they could bond over that. also about how they both prefer solitude. they can be alone together! they dont need any words, they can just exist next to eachother for a few hours and feel good about it. he also most surely hangs out with sonic every now and then. hangingout being racing and having a good fight together. though im sure sonic can eventually convince him to spend proper time together. for example making a race into a trekking tour where they go random places sonic knows or doesnt know yet, and they learn about the culture and obviously the food. shadow does seem like someone who'd like to learn about the planet, and sonic's the type of guy who's super eager to have someone to show around and explore with that can keep up!

🖤oh man idk weirdness is super subjective. uh. i wrote a fanfic once about how team dark and team sonic have a bowling competition

[bonesandthebees]

5. rocketduo

thinking about rocketduo again bc damn them, they have captured my brain

glass!rocketduo are so fun to me, like what do you mean you didnt know tommy and wilbur survived lmao, like yeah, I understand, they probably didnt want to ask about it to not be weird but its still funny to me, poor guys had quite the scare (for what they did more than deserved tho)

that brings up the question of what do deathlings think about ghosts? it would make sense for them to believe, krisitin not accepting a soul or a soul not wanting to go until they get peace, anyway I got distracted again

I think they regretted what they did. they probably didnt get enough time before seeing crimeboys are alive to have fully admitted that to themselves, but just going from their initial reactions right after killing tommy and to seeing them alive and than dealing with the consequences its clear they havent thought it through, they didnt think about howd they feel about killing tommy, how it wouldnt be worth the revenge. like im not saying they are necessarily morally above murder, but this is tommy and they used to be friends and it all happened in a burst of emotions, anger, but in the end it couldnt have been what they wanted, right? we see they regret it, clearly niki wasnt counting on losing wilbur, even tho it was pretty clear of you thought about what they wanted to do, but even jack and tommy, I believe

the truce. its yet again super interesting to me. bc after what jack (and niki) did, being the last to strike, basically, it had to be proposed by tommy, the one whos turn it is, going with basic revenge rules. otherwise it would seem a bit weak, desperate coming from rocketduo. but on the other hand tommy is who started this and the one whose stubbornness caused it to go this far (ive been saying it this whole time and ill say it again, tommy shouldve apologised AND admit he was wrong (which he was, even with his intentions he mustve seen it, looking back at it) bc this whole thing couldve been avoided with this (its so cool to see your characters being so human, not always doing the right things and having ugly traits and not being perfect, im just loving digging through the complicated moral stuff in this story)) and so him proposing this truce, giving it the same weight as his murder attempt at jack, to me, looks like admitting that his murder attempt was just as justified as jacks was (aka admitting that he was as wrong for doing so as jack was, on one hand doing it as a self-preservation (in one situation of their dignity/freedom in the other of their actual lives) on the other just being wrong

also interesting is how the truce is formulated outloud only between jack and tommy but bc of the nature of their relationships or automatically translates to wilbur and niki too and how they just accept that decision, stating their feelings about it (the trust is lost, but there care is still lingering and will probably never go away)

anyway, I wonder what was going through their heads when they showed up when tommy and wilbur were leaving, like how much of it was show-up-so-others-dont-ask (tho others know about the tension from the first murder attempt) and how much was no-matter-what-happened-i-cant-let-them-leave-without-seeing-them-one-last-time, id like to think its mostly the other, for niki its pretty obvious with wilbur, but tommy, niki and jack lived together for quite a while, jack and tommy would often go on runs together, they were friends, jack and wilbur were also somewhat friends, and jack must recognise, maybe unconsciously, that wilbur didnt really cause any of it, just got tangled in. and going completely away is very different from just ignoring each other so after all is settled and they have the "truce" ofc they had to go see them before leaving yk

we see jacks gaze, lingering on tommy, revealing some regrets he might have about what he did, now that the anger has been pushed out (literally) and now all he sees is what (who) he lost. and with niki and wilbur, obviously, wilbur doesnt trust niki but he still waves back, he makes sure she can see his metal fingers (he knows she will understand what that means to him, plus its something they have in common, another way they can understand each other, bc while the trust has been broken the care and understanding remains)

(if I ever try and get adhd diagnosis ill just show them how many parentheses I use and speedrun it)/j

in my head the reason rocketduo didn't know that wilbur and tommy survived is that rocketduo got back from the palace stinking of smoke with their throats raw having just worked together to murder their friend. they did not talk to a single person, they both just went to their rooms and passed the fuck out. and everyone else in the temple was pretty much in the same boat in terms of being exhausted, so no one really bothered going to breakfast the next morning. phil just did a headcount to make sure everyone lived and everyone kind of just meandered out on their own time to get their food. and both jack and niki made a point of not talking to any of the other deathlings because they both had some conflicted feelings over what they'd done. if they'd had another few hours, niki probably would've gone to the infirmary on her own to see if wilbur had made it out.

deathlings don't really believe in ghosts but you know how irl there's always people who are like "I don't really believe but like if I see evidence-" that's kind of how I see jack. niki, not so much. if you notice she didn't actually say anything about them being ghosts. that's because unlike jack, she knew they weren't ghosts. she knew the moment she saw them that they'd both survived and realized that now she had to face what she'd done

tommy absolutely should've admitted that he was in the wrong when he tried to kill jack before. all of this could've been avoided. but he didn't, because tommy has a lot of issues. but he's also started to learn from his mistakes. example: him calling the truce. tommy finally realized that meeting anger with anger doesn't get you anywhere. an eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind and all that. he understands that if he were to try and get back at jack for killing him, the cycle would just continue on and on. and of course, like you said, he recognizes that jack was justified in doing what he did. he sees now how his own actions led to this.

niki and jack both showing up to see tommy and wilbur leave was 100% them wanting to see the two of them before they went. there was no matter of appearances. it was the lingering care they both still have for their friends despite everything that's happened. it's wilbur and niki yes, but it also genuinely is the lingering attachment both jack and niki have to tommy. they've been friends with him for years. they both cared for him for a very long time and despite everything that care isn't completely gone. they have to see him leave. both of them.

but of course niki and wilbur have the most tension in that moment. because wilbur makes sure she sees his fingers, and she knows what she did to him. she deeply cared about wilbur and still does, and wilbur does still care about her as well. like you said, it's an understanding they now share. and in a way, wilbur choosing to wave at her was a peace offering. one that says he's not going to forget what happened, but in the future when he and tommy come back, maybe they can recover some of what was lost.

[alebrijediscordico]

Yknow what. even if the way of water ends up being good, im just gonna say right now what i could've changed in the first movie to like. make it a bit more heavy in the story department,

like. starting with whatever the Fuck is going on on avatar's earth. i feel like, going with and idea of the military of that earth Maybe not even giving jake's brother (twin? i need to watch the movie again) a proper funeral. so- what if this earth is a fully military dystopian.

like i can almost visualize this scene where jake tells how is earth, something along the lines of "-and i remember reading history books telling us of this great man, who united the world and helped science go even further than we could even dream... just to turn around and tell everyone that the stars were full of enemies, and we needed to make sure we gotten them first before them us. and they were keeping materials from us. 'precious, precious materials' i remember my teacher saying back then. my brother ate all those weird lies and enlisted the first day he turned 18" or... idk. but you get the idea.

Then once he's in pandora, he's just... kinda amazed with the world. perhaps experiencing child like wonder for the first time in Years. or maybe even ever. like.. pandora was so full of life and creatures, so beautiful and free...

maybe its even a surprise to him because probably most of the greenery and animals in earth is much less now. or worst even, behind some kind of paywall, so seeing all these plants could probably lead him to rebel the military (because maybe he respects them, but the trust of them is on thin ice. idk i feel like it adds smth)

(also, maybe instead of not being able to use both of his legs, maybe he lost one or was born without one, BUT still uses a wheelchair to make more obvious that the state on earth is fucking shitty, in the sense that maybe prosthetics stopped being made because the dictator that turned the earth into that state was Beyond Awful and idk,, didnt see an use on them? but Also maybe for some reason his avatar is also missing a leg but they Do give him a prosthetic (to his avatar and later to him too) for military reasons. and in a weird way that could send him and the audience the message that they only did that because he was useful to them)

anyways, so the movie goes forward, he gets to know the na'vi and i mean Know them. he sees little and Big cultural things, like dances, traditional food and hunting, clothes, children playing while chasing each others tail, maybe even word puns with their language (IDK, MORE STUFF. A BIGGER GLIMPSE OF A CULTURE THAN JUST PRETTY BLUE PPL ( sorry, my demons)). And that, along side other missions he takes to see more of that world, break more and more the ice under jake until he's in the deep end, almost drowning at the face of having to choose; he either has to tell the na'vi of the soon to be invasion and be seen as a traitor or keep quiet and try to sabotage the next missions + the big one against the tree. and maybe to add more emotion, i was thinking since the planet of pandora is like this Big Connected organism, the na'vi learned from it to connect stuff too, to their surroundings and to themselves, to the point the prosthetics they make are more natural, almost feeling like if it was skin and bone. because no-fucking-body is gonna tell me a sentient species could get that far without taking care of the ones with less, facing problems out of their control or severely hurt. NO ONE.

Now, for reasons jake tries to first sabotage the missions along side the other characters + more scientists that are slowly being dragged to the good side, but they fail so he has to run and warn the na'vi... but he fails, he's too late like in the movie.

and almost everything is the same, up to the point where he needs to get their trust back. Now, at some point he gets the news that Neytiri has become Toruk Makto to be able to defend her people more easily, so the white savior narrative is officially out of the fucking window now, thank you very much. And besides!! it makes! more! sense!!!

now, what happens instead of him coming up with the Leonopteryx, is that once he and neytiri reunite again, she lets the Leonopteryx connect to the tree they had and then tells jake that "it will decide if youre worthy of getting our trust back" and if he doesnt... he dies.

but since it got connected to the tree before, telling some of his worries and asking for advice, almost praying to the ones in the tree to help him do the right thing, the Leonopteryx takes that in mind and gives him a second chance. Neytiri takes more time to forgive him tho, but she accepts the help.

Now, they know the antagonists are coming, so not only they reunite more na'vi to fight them like originally, but they send others to travel far to the tribes of the world, the one's they couldnt get to fast enough for help, with a message. "a danger looms in this world. this danger is big and it wont stop. Its hungry of power, it doesnt reason and it will kill, and their weapons are not for getting food or defend, they are made to destroy. please be warned" Which could be perfect as a set up for the next movie,

anyway, the big fight happens, no one dies but most of the main human characters do need to be transferred to their avatars because their human bodies wont make it.

and thats how my rewrite of the movie would end, BUT, since there's more movies coming, i was thinking. what if the things that happened here had repercussions on the earth of this universe.

like im thinking people get news of what happened and for some time they think the na'vi are bad- until the true gets revealed by a scientist that got back during the second/third movie to share all they had discovered, including the fact that the military burned down a very important thing for the na'vi for no good reason at all (reflecting how the military in that world also burned multiple things for Also no reason at all) and that snaps something in people. like a spark of fire in a dry and dying forest of people who were already fucking tired of the military state of the earth. so while things are going on in pandora, things are goin on back in earth too, so the movies series would probably end with the people on earth winning along side the na'vi on pandora, and the new leader in place of making sure the defeated soldiers and generals going back to earth dont hold any power anymore.

....so yeah, maybe i have A Few thoughts on this movie. it was deffo bim narrative wise, but that just means i got to do This <3

[livecharliereaction]

Bye tsumihoroboshi

thats all for tsumihoroboshi chapter ZAMN. omfg i did cry i cant lie at that big battle on the rooftop i did i did i did.. It just hits a litte close to home friendship and all that... I love my friends so mach i get everything theyre feeling u know... AND the delusions of rena what a crazy writing style i dont think ill get over it like ever. urgh. Well the final tip almost wanted me to consider that "ooh maybe she was right!" but honestly my takeaways from it are juts 1. disaster happens regardless no matter how the events go otherwise 2. rika was murdered? Thats pretty weird 3. BUT theres hope liek she said BECAUSE: keiichi rememberd something from "another world" (i know a timeloop when i see one. its def a timeloop. Hells yeah) 4. the scrapbooks do hvae some evil spell or something takano i am onto you its weird anyway she shows up at such times and all.. Idk if shes the #MAIN VILLAIN DEMON OMG but shes Something.

Rena i love you thank you for solidifying your place as my favorite good time. argh every chapter so far is better than the one before it goes for this one too it does it does... Which is amazing implications for next ones... Lets hope they keep it up...

And keiichi i cant lie i do love you. I love you i love you i love you. Ughh. If i was still 16 hed have a big chance at going to that kinlist. But hes so gross so i wouldnt actually have added him then either!!! im unable to kin these days because EVERY GOOD CHARACTER EVER has Some Traits I Can Relate To Myself becuase i dont know something something human emotion something i am just like everyone else and everyone is just like me in the end and i love it. But yeah keiichi love the guy hes so #Power of Friendship #Protagonist. Im mentioning this cos i loved the girls from the start and still do but keiichi had to prove himself a little...

Yeah im curious about satoko now too i dont think i paid her enough mind i sort of ended up assuming shes #Normal but just super close to rika obviously but that one line about her being older. I couldnt tell yet if its Haha satokos body is older and rikas being funny! OR Omg satoko some immortal or something too woww! but yeah. I wouldnt think she is it doesnt seem that way at all BUT u never know w this fuckass series..ou ou ou ou ou

Mion i love you the girl that you are. Rena you are everything and more. Rika how have you managed to stay mysterious ive been here for like over 30 hours total for sure maybe even 40. But hmm

if its a timeloop i still cant tell what its about. id say rikas in charge (wants to keep giving this world a chance) n takano is with the antagonistic forces But how does it work exactly? If rikas the one "looping the time" directly it doesnt really compute unless she can do it from the afterlife. I dont konw.

And Omfg i hate this series because i STILL believe satoshi will show up one day. Even though it seems impossible now. But i liked him n shion so much dude i love shion so satoshi HAS TO come back for her. Urgh urgh urgh

But yeah i fr didnt think keiichi would be able to break renas delusion even for such a long moment But he pulled it off. Shes really cool i love her. I love her i love her i love her. UGHHH. Everything and more. and i said it alr but ill say it again the portrayal of her delusional state is SO personal to me i get her i get her i DO so good... Urghh. Ok. Thank u charhigurashi6 i have to check how many games the bundle i bought still has hmm

ok these 3 i own but havent installed lets see The first one here is um well i dont know that girl i havent seen her which is concerning! I feel like i mightve seen a sprite (in the og style that i read with) but thats kinda it. I recall seeing a name somewhere too shes a furude i think but not too sure Im always frustrated when i see a spoiler like that but then it never makes me any more knowledgeable about anything so so far its fine #LOL. proably has to do with the demon stuff tho...

takano in the middle one right takano you are so weird and offputting. Damn maybe she IS the big bad afterall

last one aww rika But yeah thats. I dont know its at least 5 hrs each but i think i spent like 10+ hrs on meakashi so it could possibly be up to like what. 15 even 20? per game. At least 15 hours left though.. Idt theres anything outside of the bundle after this its either higu anime time or umineko time ill see what kinda time i have then (i can probably watch the anime while multitasking i dont really care so much but umineko i want to be TUNED. IN.)

yay exciting ok thank u charhigurashi6 best chapter so far loved it love u rena love u everyone ok gn

[igreu-simmons]

im so f**king tired of everything

the self help shit on social media is bullshit if you cant even utilize that stuff in your day to day life. Im so done with staying at home and doing absolutely nothing. I'm use to making new friends every year but the friends that I made last year were truly bad for me so I cut them off but now I am alone. I havent spoken to anyone in so long and I am literally losing it. Even writing a post like this feels like shouting in silence but atleast I get to publicly yell about it (stepping outside of my door and trying to yell will just get people to make weird looks at me).

My friend said one of the worst things you can do is introducing your friend group to a different friend group. I don't know how legitimately the friend who told me this was since I only met him online. I dont know if I am currently living in a day and age where making online friends should be normal but to me it is not. Anyways i heard him out cause he seemed like he was speaking with experience and expertise regarding this topic and he said that.... well honestly I dont remember what he said. I dont think he elaborated anymore on that but my imagination and overthinking skills kicked in to try to figure out why mixing friend groups would be so shit.

So, I looked at my specific circumstances. One friend group was this group of friends I met online during the covid online schooling year. Some of the guys I met from one of my classes introduced me to their old neighborhood friends a few months after and I started talking more and more to them. With the online

Explaining all of that was important because that is why I am alone today. Does a part of this state of being "alone" come with loneliness, yes, but I would like to thing that this is something that I am familiar with and something I just havent seen in a while. What the problem is is that I am feeling the most experimental and rebellious right now and I can't do anything about it. Yes I have been known to be kinda extroverted and loud, possibly even confident online when talking to random people, but whether that was a product of the lack of consequences of my actions and possibly tying the words I was saying to me as a person, its very possible and possibly true. I want to run and I want to fall. I want to do the things that I feel like I have been training my whole life to do and have mentally trained myself for to "slay". I dont even care if I have a childhood or teenagehood, me running will always be my teenagehood.

But again, I feel trapped. At this point its a waiting game where I just have to sit and suffer. Then, you might be asking, what is the point of sitting down and writing your complaints if they are going to go away soon? Its the fact that I have to sit and suffer through the wait in the first place. I have waited for many things in my life. Results to exams which I had studied for, results to exams which I hadn't studied for, the consequences to my mistakes whether it could've been fixed by eraser or by having better friends that I didnt feel peer pressured by. I have waited for so many things that were to be revealed in the next following hours or things that were in the distance future. But right now is the first time that I had felt like I was wasting my own time. My own time anxiety was compounded with the fact that my suffering was not just me learning to experience a different emotion for the sake of getting out of my comfort zone. My suffering was the bad choice that was presented to me when the good choice was also there right along. It was this summer when I started to feel like my life was truly in the my own hands and I could make something of it myself, and yet I was still stuck at home.

This could be a blessing. As much as I love being organized, maybe I was not to be trusted. Instead allowing myself to learn like how I wanted to, learning about life would cause there to be irreversable problems to my perfect suburban life. Really I had many things that the other kids had but I just wanted to do something on my own.

I would like to say that all of this is just in my head but in the same way that I feel the need to be shouting this in an online post and making a mark in physical space, this has been taking a physical toll on my body. I havent been able to eat properly and some days sleep properly in the past few days and plates of dinner I had tried to convince myself I would finish are laying in the room next to mine because they have officially started to smell. When your brain can't find a way to directly fight the thing it hates, it compensates by ruining something else that was doing fine in your life. I wish I could say that I am going to try to eat better by whats the point of fixing something if nothing is gonna change anyways?

**

this post is incomplete and shares the surface level of the thoughts that linger through my mind during this year's summer months. I will be doing my best to finish the thoughts that I have started in the near future

<igreu3