#and her content is some of the only Healthful Eating type content that not only doesn’t trigger any of my disordered thoughts with food

[brotherlysuggestion]

Hey, for any of my little sibs trying to learn to eat salads/vegetables but running into a lot of unhappiness/failure/sensory issues, I recently started learning to eat veggies after a lifetime of struggling due to autism and sensory issues, and I have some tips that I’ve collected along the way!

Forget all about the “healthiest varieties” or “most nutritional salads” elitism.

A lot of that talk is based on bogus science or half-truths to begin with, but even for anything that’s true, you’re trying to eat in a way that is sustainable for you. You don’t need to be like anybody else. If you like iceberg lettuce, screw the people who say “well that doesn’t have any nutritional value”. It’s fiber and roughage if nothing else! You like a lot of dressing or add ins and people tell you that isn’t a real salad/isn’t a healthy salad? It’s more vegetables than no vegetables! It gets the greens in your body! Do your thing, you don’t deserve guilt (external or internal) for figuring out your own path.

This is about habit forming and breaking bad associations to form better ones.

Think of this as practice! I eat salads nearly daily when available because I genuinely look forward to them now, but I used to want to retch at just the thought of salad. When I used to think of salads, I always thought of being a kid and trying not to gag while forcing sensory hell so that adults wouldn’t get mad at me. It was punishing for me, and it took a lot of gentle work to change that association! So if you hate salads, really try to identify why. Are they bland and tasteless to you? Conversely, are the bitter flavors too strong? Is it a textural thing? Do you have some highly negative experiences with them in the past?

Don’t force yourself to keep trying something you know you hate.

I personally can’t stand a lot of “ultra healthy” salads that have a lot of different textures/flavors mixed in, and years of trying to suffer through salads like that never made me like them more. Back to the first point again, forget about what you’re “supposed” to be eating and eat what you find the least repulsive tbh.

The greens you choose can make a massive difference, so try a lot of different things!

This is especially important if texture or flavor is an issue for you. Personally I find iceberg lettuce the “easiest” because it has a very mild taste. I started out my adventures in learning to eat salad eating EXCLUSIVELY iceberg lettuce. Butter lettuce or romaine (especially romaine hearts) are others that are popular for being pretty palatable, and I’ve come to love them! And you don’t even HAVE to have lettuce! You can have cabbage, beets, carrots, whatever! Pick a vegetable you like and search for salad recipes using it!

Find a dressing you really like and drench that bad boy if you need to!

Some people really like ranch, or poppyseed dressing, or vinaigrettes, or even sweet dressings with honey and fruit! You can use mustard or honey in dressings! Look up different types of salad dressings and try them all out if you want. Personally, I really like zingy dressings like Italian vinaigrettes or blue cheese, but everyone’s different. You can make a lot of dressings at home, too, and if you have the stuff already it can be a cheap way to find what you like. I know dressing freaks some people out, but referencing my very first point again; some salad is way better than no salad. You may even eventually find yourself able to use less and less once you’re more accustomed to eating salad! So use as much as you need, whether it’s just for now or forever.

Toppings! Salads are allowed to be goodies with obstacles!

Use a protein like chicken or fish (I like tuna a lot) or crumbled bacon, use croutons, hummus, little cubes of cheese or shredded cheese, sliced hard boiled eggs, whatever! If there’s vegetables that you know you like, put those in! I love some sliced cucumber or shredded carrots in my salads. Some people do nuts like almonds or cashews in their salads, some people use chickpeas and corn from a can, and if you’re feeling super adventurous you can try some fruit to sweeten things up! If you like variety then mix warm foods and cold foods, creamy textures and crunchy textures! Make it totally your own. Personally, I’ll sometimes eat around my croutons so that once I’ve eaten all of my greens I have a big, crunchy reward. There’s no rules for how you have to eat something!

Conversely, be as simple as you need to be.

If you need to get used to salads by eating just iceberg lettuce and ranch for a while, you don’t need to be embarrassed! You don’t have to throw the kitchen sink at your salad, even if that’s what helps some others! This is about what works for you.

Don’t be afraid to have salad ingredients… not as a salad!

You can make a green smoothie by blending ingredients if texture is your big issue! Or make a fruit smoothie with some spinach or lettuce thrown in to help you ease into it. Or try dicing up some lettuce, cabbage, and a preferred vegetable or two (avocado, bell pepper, tomato, or cucumber would all work!). Drizzle that with a generous amount of dressing or sauce, and you can use it as a chip dip! Tortilla chips work especially well for this. Or maybe make a vegetable wrap in an actual tortilla? Or throw some chopped up vegetables in your next soup. Even if it’s as simple as putting some lettuce, carrots, or tomatoes into a sandwich, that’s awesome too!

Even outside of salads, experiment with texture for vegetables!

You can roast most vegetables on a sheet pan in the oven (or in an air fryer) for a crispy and crunchy experience! Or you can boil or steam them on a stovetop (or in the microwave) to different levels of softness; you can get most vegetables pretty mushy with enough time, if crunchy textures are hard for you! Looking up vegetarian versions of your favorite meat-including dishes can sometimes also offer great ideas for getting different textures out of vegetables! Try everything that you think you might like: grilling, griddling, roasting, steaming, boiling, sautéing, braising, stir frying, and blanching (which also helps reduce bitterness!) are all different methods to look into, and different methods have different results with different vegetables!

Big takeaway…

Be patient and kind with yourself. Working through food aversions is hard. The goal is gently pushing/testing your boundaries and expanding your comfort zone, NOT forcing yourself. Forcing yourself into extreme discomfort, distress, or pain typically only makes aversions worse! So it’s in your best interest to be patient and go as slowly as you need to. Be proud of yourself for trying, and don’t let anyone (including yourself) make you feel shame for doing what you can.

And obligatory disclaimer:

Please don’t get discouraged if none of these tips work for you! This isn’t an exhaustive list, and I’m not any kind of professional. This is just a mix of tips I’ve seen online, and what worked for myself and my own sensory issues, and I’m still learning more about myself all the time! If you’re struggling, there’s still more out there! You can achieve your goals, I believe in you. 💖

[colourstreakgryffin]

Yandere Muichiro, Tanjiro and Giyuu forcing his beloved to eat, and she spits the food out or turns her head to the side refusing. Because she is angry after the kidnapping?

Ooooh! Okay! This can be very simple to write about! It’s been so long since I’ve done a proper request so let’s go, here it comes!

Yandere Muichiro

“Darling… I am done with this foolish game, eat now”

Muichiro’s patience is running thin very fast as his fingertips press firmer on the pair of chopsticks he is holding out, the contents inbetween the eating utensils being a fresh hot salmon dumpling. It’s been fifteen minutes straight of this going on and on…

You, his beloved little angel, just refusing to eat the lunch he had spent almost two whole hours making, all for you and you’re rejecting him? What is he doing wrong? Why aren’t you happy? You’re with him now, you’re in the safety of his home and it’s so cozy, warm and perfect in this bedroom. What is there to dislike about this situation? Muichiro doesn’t get it

To you, you couldn’t despise Muichiro anymore than you already do. He took away your freedom, disorientated your senses, dragged you to this awful mansion and has tied you up to a futon by a pair of steely Nichirin metal chains, you cannot break free and he is forcing you to stay put all so obediently until he comes back. Everytime Muichiro walks into the room, you want to throw up

Muichiro, with furious sharp mint green eyes and a open scowl at your refusal as you stay silent and tilt your head away from him, uses his free hand to roughly grip your chin and pull your face back into his forward-facing direction to pry open your mouth by your cheeks with no-longer gentle calloused fingers to shove the dumpling into your mouth, forcing you to close your mouth with his strong, stern hold as it looks like he is ready to snap your neck if you disobey him…

How could such a sweet, timid little cutie like Muichiro, the young adult you had fallen for. End up being such a sick psychopath like this? And what did you do to deserve this type of treatment? Kidnapped, socially-isolated, heartbroken and now being forced to eat food you are thousand percent certain may just be laced with some type of drug…

Yandere Tanjiro

Tanjiro sighs gently, on the verge of just losing himself but he will not give up at all, never, he cannot just risk being all flimsy whilst his beloved is incapable of caring for herself. His determination is made of titanium and his will is stronger than steel. The Kamado smiles warmly and sweetly, his pretty plum red eyes almost glowing as he, once again, picks out a chopstick-full of nice healthy seafood rice and places it in his mouth. Like with a picky stubborn child, he is demonstrating that the dinner he has brought for you on this fine cool night, is not dangerous and not laced with anything

The food, its quality and its safety is not the problem to you at all, the real problem is what Tanjiro has done to you… your ex-crush, the man you really liked. Ended up being a complete and utter dangerous monster to you, drugged you up with a simple cup of tea, dragged you back to his Estate and is now keeping your disappearance a secret, so nobody can try look for you as he has made sure everybody thinks you had passed away from a mission

Continuously spitting out the rice chopstick-fulls that Tanjiro gently but firmly shoves into your mouth, his tolerance over the ‘disrespect’ grows more and more unable to keep up. You just keep refusing him at every turn and he finds it so heartbreaking, he has done so much for you… so much. His love for you is so strong that he can’t stop thinking about you and it’s driving him mad, just as much as you refusing to eat the dinner is

Tanjiro can only hope the demonstrations he keeps doing for you will break through your stubborn barrier, he is only doing this for your health and your safety. Just eat the food already, you need some type of sustenances, you can’t starve yourself. That’ll make Tanjiro just lose his marbles to a uncontrollable state if he cannot make you digest anything beneficial and life-saving, especially when you clearly need it. Now, that you’re restrained to his futon and not going anywhere anytime soon

He is very ready to just begin begging as you close your mouth with a open hateful scowl directed at him, it makes his heart shatter further at how much you openly despise him, how angry and agitated you are. You’ve been this way for hours, for days and it’s getting tiresome. You just need to accept your new life, that’s Tanjiro’s thought process. He doesn’t like seeing you so upset and so irritate but he cannot risk you going out, where demons and men run around… it’s too dangerous

“Please, sweetheart… how about just half? Can you just have half?”

Yandere Giyuu

Giyuu is growing frustrated. So frustrated as he gazes the shattered ceramic bowl and the discarded of piping hot udon, the savoury liquid pooling over the large broken pieces of the cutlery. How disappointing and cruel… Giyuu is trying his best to make you eat, his precious sweetheart, the one woman he needs more than anything ever. He has gone far beyond any other person would to make sure you will stay with him, he can’t stand the fact you’re not cooperating him

Giyuu’s cold dark sapphire blue eyes slide from the destroyed remnants of the dinner he cooked for you to you directly, tied up with firm tight ropes up against his futon and trying to wiggle out of the grasp of the irritating binds. Giyuu won’t let you leave at all so there is truly no point for you to try, you’re never walking out of the door without him linked to your side, you’re never talking to anybody without his permission. He won’t take any chances and he cannot lose you, like he has lost everybody else in his life

“My love… was there something off about the udon?”

You didn’t even answer Giyuu, not at all giving him a single side-glance at your pure unadulterated fury bubbling over uncontrollably that you just desire to lash out at your kidnapper. The sweet, shy, small-voiced man you had enjoyed speaking to in your time of independent freedom. The one who went from gentle but interested to a full-blown threat as he took you away from humanity, he took away your ability to walk around and now suspects you to love him back?!

Giyuu, on his end, is just trying his best to prove to you how much you mean to him, that he has gone to such a extreme drastic, the most extreme drastic possible, to show you his undivided passionate love. That he is devoting so much of his time to you and taking care of you, the most perfect little housewife. You don’t need to do anything anymore. Don’t you want a man to take care of you and ensure no demons ever touch you? That sounds great to Giyuu as a whole

Maybe not today, but Giyuu will make you love him as much as he loves you, he will make you willingly accept every longtime cooking gift he presents you, he will have you all his to the point you don’t even want to go out anymore. He must, he needs you and he knows he can’t live without you nor with himself if you’re still running around the dead of night where demons prowl, you’re safe here and that’s the greatest thing a Hashira like him can do for his lover

[lilacsareinbloomagain]

Yandere time and hyrule headcannons

I'm not sure if you've seen the hype around sky being in his undershirt and being ✨pretty✨ in the recent update, but could I please request reader fawning over Yan!sky in his undershirt or some general hc's for him?

Thank you both for requesting!

Notes: I wasn't that online on tumblr around that time, so I only saw it now lmao.

Anyway, I did both headcannons and a oneshot, hope you'll like it!

Also, yes, I merged those two requests since headcannons can be piled into the same post.

I'll probably sound redundant in a lot of these, simply because I didn't write this at one go and when I got to it again I may have forgotten that I wrote it before. My memory is not the best, forgive me.

There are more headcannons for Time because he's my favorite, sorry.

I need a master list, seriously.

Edited before sleeping, I'm sleepy and probably messed up one or two paragraphs of this.

The oneshot in question.

TWs: Yanderism, Mentions of food and bad eating habits and a little of my fairy/fae brain rot.

Don't mind grammatical errors, please!

Headcannons for yandere Sky, Time and Hyrule.

Yandere! Lu! Sky x Reader

For starters, Sky is sweet, but he is very manipulative.

Therefore, don't be surprised if you notice you stopped doing many of the things you used to do when you first got through the portal.

Most of the time it's not even bad things!

He might team up with Hyrule and Wild to take care of your main health, like eating habits. If you're a picky eater then expect Sky to slowly transition you into eating a little bit of everything, in no time you'll be eating like Wild does.

Then again, he'll also make sure to get the ingredients to the foods you do eat without struggling, also getting Wild to make a separate meal for you, should you not eat that one specific recipe Wild made for dinner.

You'll probably be getting help from him when it comes to self-care habits as well, like, the max of skin care and hair care you can get at Hyrule. He will make the effort to talk to people who know more about your skin and hair type, those who have it and take care of it well.

But, we can't ignore the genuinely bad things he will try to influence you into doing...

Privacy? Gone.

Not only will he be around you most if not all of the time, but he will also always be paying close attention to you and what you're doing.

So if you believed keeping a journal in your language would help you keep some things to yourself, then think again. The privacy of using your language instead of hyrulean to write in your jornal will soon turn into a mere illusion. Despite being more quiet and seemingly the less imposing of the Links, Sky has already gone, and will keep going through lengths for you, which includes learning the language you use.

Of course he noticed you kept a private journal, and despite you trying to lie about the contents of it, it's only a matter of time until he is skillfully scanning through the pages with his eyes like he's reading his favorite book. Memorizing any and all information he can find about you.

As manipulative as he is, he is also delusional, he doesn't have any idea of what he is doing, he simply doesn't know that what he is doing is wrong on so many levels.

He's not doing anything on purpose, he's just trying to protect you and get you to like him, like a normal guy!! At least, Zelda liked it when he did this with her back then, just how different are you two?

Genuinely, Sky would have a hard time figuring you and your emotions out. You're a human being after all, and he respects that those things are not supposed to be easy to figure out. In fact, he highly respects and appreciates that you're complex.

Not that he'll respect boundaries, nope, no way.

You're a puzzle he's very much looking forward to figuring out. Honestly, the only puzzle he'd ever want to figure out.

So, I'll probably elaborate this later, but the chain as Gods. Sky would be very much a Thor. That means silly blonde lightening man.

Imagine hylians from Sky's era used matching earrings alike engagement rings, like, Sky just randomly inviting you to an overly nice picnic, just to hand you blue earings just like his.

And if you don't have your ears pierced anywhere it'd be even better in his eyes, since he'd just adjust it to be a "normal" ring.

It was actually an engagement ring, but you didn't know that, or any of the other Links, really, since this tradicional custom got lost in time.

Yandere! Lu! Time x Reader

I think pretty much everyone knows Time is a teasing bastard.

Don't get me wrong, he can be pretty mature, but trust me, it's not really common for him to act like that.

Time is used to pretending, he used many different masks to become different races in his journey, that was needed from him at the time, the same way that being the mature one is being needed from him right now.

Just because he is deeply traumatized emotionally and physically from his job as a hero doesn't mean his personality is lost as well.

It didn't change that much since he was a child, not really.

He is addicted to making you flustered, so if you get flustered easily I'm sorry for you.

If making you blush is a challenge then I'm just as sorry for you, because Time isn't quite known for giving up easily.

And he's good at making people embarrassed, too.

The amount of women who were in love with him is everything I need as proof.

But the worst part? He doesn't have bad pick up lines.

Look, Time is a toucher, so yes, his love language is physical touch, that makes sense to me.

That doesn't mean only cuddling, of course, it can mean cuddling and hugging when you're alone, but do expect a few more things.

I was gonna say hand holding in public, especially in crowded places, but you know what? Guiding you by holding the back of your neck is simply easier to him, and a lot more obvious "back off!" to strangers who look at you for far too long.

Also, randomly leaning against you, the two of you may be just walking and suddenly you feel a large mass lightly leaning against your own body, almost making you stumble. you might just be standing in front of the dinner table, reading a recipe book and once again you just feel that familiar presence right behind you, but instead of hugging you from behind he's just there, like he is reading the book along with you.

Remember how you were reading that one recipe book? Well he might give it a try and help you make something in the kitchen just to spend time with you. Like, you're just pouring ingredients in a bowl and he's there "helping" you by wrapping his arm around your waist to give you "emotional support", as he calls it.

He is, in reality, just standing there watching you cook, trying his best to resist the urge to distract you and simply annoy you, because he is still trying to make it seem like he is a mature, grown man, and definitely not one who is eyeing the flour in his reach and thinking about launching a handful of it at you.

You did see his hand slowly reaching for the flour in the corner of your vision. He only stopped once you threatened to scoop out his remaining eye should even a speck of flour hit your face.

Yet, Time is a creative man, flour was only one of his plans.

He's got wandering hands and wandering lips. And he can and will make use of those just to distract you.

And that's how Time became banned from the kitchen when you were the one cooking, only being able to join you for cleaning later.

So yeah, his love language is physical touch, but it is also disturbance.

In that matter, he's not very different from Wind when you two are alone. If you ignore his flirtatious moves, that is. But he's quite different when you two are with the others, especially if you've done, or is doing something to annoy him, then he has to keep up that mature facade of his.

He believes the others won't take him seriously should he reveal his actual personality, so really, when you're around others you'll only get glimpses of it from time to time.

It is mandatory from the Links to be stubborn, but Time takes the cake.

Maybe it is his age, but he will never change his mind, ever. No point in arguing.

So when he is silly, he is silly, but when he is serious he is terrifying, no exaggeration.

The worst part is that older people have a lot of respect in Hyrule, so no matter what he says, his word is law.

Now, don't get me wrong, by now, pet names are just a thing Time always does with you, in a way you barely hear your own name coming from his lips unless he's being really serious about something.

But actual words of affirmation? Not his thing.

He'd much rather be as clingy as glue to you when you're alone.

But, not like Sky's soft, light cuddles. Time Will basically smother you.

Seriously, it may be his sheer muscle mass, but he'll drap himself over you in a way you'll feel yourself surrounded by him.

In fact, the first time he did it you probably almost suffocated.

You'll get used to it eventually, though. Hopefully.

He's pontual and very strict as well, he and Hyrule are probably gonna be bickering in most matters involving you, like, for example, "five more minutes" naps.

Don't even try to trick him, you'll hear stuff like "I was your age once" and shit, the man will act like he's a hundred years old or something.

Then again, he might be, after all, he is older in mind than he is in body.

He was forced to mature quicker and went through a lot of trauma, that, and he also had to go back in time a lot of times.

Now that I think about it, he probably lived for longer than your grandparents. Just saying.

Yandere! Lu! Hyrule x Reader

Don't get him wrong, Hyrule is very much full of love, really. He cares about everyone equally.

Yet, as corny as that is, your name isn't "everyone", you're not anyone, you're you, how could he even think about possibly treating you the same way as he treats everyone else?

You're put on a pedestal, everyone else is treated equally by him, except you, you are treated like you are divine and not mortal like he is.

So you'll feel like a toddler 24/7 around Hyrule, he is not as stubborn as Time, he's just… Persistent.

The other Links will find themselves teasing him for it a lot, even if deep inside they are just the same.

Play nice, walk on the line and you'll have a Hyrule at your beck and call. If you know how to do it right, you will be able to use his babying to your own benefit, because trust me, his persistence can work on the Links much more than yours, after all, they trust him for being another Link.

I feel like he'd also help you keep pets, it may be his fairy nature, but he is just good with animals, especially with forest animals. Be them small or big.

Although he definitely has a soft spot for smaller pets, even more if you're the one asking him to bring along a pet you found.

Surprisingly or not, Hyrule is probably one of the most protective Links if you happen to lean more towards the naive/vulnerable side of the spectrum.

It's a general fairy headcannon of mine, but since fairies take care of forest and the animals there, specially the smaller or more vulnerable types of animals, then it's not new for them to be also quite protective towards humans close to them.

Bonus points if they have those traits.

But then again, you're Hyrule's darling, you may be as strong and independent as a Link yourself, but he'll still see you as in need of his care and attention at all times.

That also may or may not be another reason why Hyrule treats you like a toddler.

So yeah, coddling. Lots of it.

Hyrule is also a fan of small things, trinkets. Natural or shiny... Precious or useless... In his eyes all are treasures.

Treasures you'll find your bags and pockets full of.

He is absolutely a rock, cristal guy.

Imagine, you're just walking to another village, and suddenly Hyrule stops walking for a few moments, just to speed walk towards you again just a bit later, cleaning something he is holding in his hands with the help of his sleeve.

Then he hands you a small, clear rock, grinning.

Better get used to this, it's probably gonna happen at least once every day.

So yeah, love language is gift giving and acts of service.

I feel like he's very awkward with words of affirmation, he didn't spend a lot of time saying or hearing those, after all. Like most of the Links.

[dira333]

Passing Peonies - Post War Touya Todoroki - Part V

When the war ended, Midoriya Izuku had proven one thing: That Villains did not need to be killed to be defeated. That you could make friends from enemies.

Touya Todoroki, formerly known as Dabi, had been one of those taken into the rehabilitation program. After one year of intense physical and psychological therapy, he's got the chance to prove himself. To prove that he can be a part of this world.

Complete fic length: 30.600 words - Masterlist

Warnings: poor mental health and resentment against past actions is mentioned, burn scars etc. as well. There is angst but this is mostly soft Touya coming back to his family...

Part 5: (2k words)

“I have to say something.” Touya says and watches his therapist.

After more than a year of this he should be able to read him as well as the other way around, right? But he still comes up empty, day after day.

“I’m falling in love with my employer.”

“Go on.” 

And it’s like that first time at your apartment, the worlds spilling from his lips like molten cheese, the first word pulling the second and third with it, and so on and so forth.

🌺.

“Hey, can we buy these?” He asks at the convenience store, pointing at a shelf of browning ZZ and pancake plants. 

“If you want.” Fuyumi shrugs. “It’s your money.”

“Yeah, yeah. They’re not gonna die, don’t worry. If anything, I’m saving their life.”

“Whatever you say. Hey, you mind eating Curry again tonight?”

“Nah. But you could show me how to do it. I wouldn’t mind helping out with cooking.”

Fuyumi throws him a look he chooses to ignore, content on placing the plants inside the cart.

🌺.

“Be careful with the stems.” He tells Natsuo. “Don’t break them.”

“It’s not that easy, you fucker.” His brother curses. “How the fuck do you tie these ribbons? Is that witchcraft?”

“No, it’s a skill and you’re lacking it. If you can’t do it, let me. Just make sure there’s plant food in the water or the roses won’t keep fresh as long.

“Yeah, yeah. I just wanted to cut some flowers for Mom, not a lecture.”

“Be honest, you wanted both.”

🌺.

“You’re home late.” He says when Shouto drags himself inside. “Have you eaten anything today?”

“I had Soba.” His brother mentions and drapes himself over a chair as he starts taking off his uniform.

“I’m making you a grilled cheese. Miso soup too. You need to eat properly.”

“Thanks.” He hears a quiet mumble and so much more that’s left unsaid.

🌺.

His mother finds him outside, reading a book and taking samples of the earth around the garden, rubbing it between his fingers and sniffing it.

“Are you having fun?” She asks and places a pitcher of homemade lemonade and two glasses on the table, taking a seat to watch him work.

“It’s a shame we have mainly grass lawn, mom.” He explains to her, surprised by his own eagerness, his own growing interest. “If we planted bushes and flowers and expand on the diversity of plants, we could help foster not only bees but different types of butterflies and birds.”

“That does sound appealing. Why don’t you talk to your father about it?”

She smiles until her eyes reach a stump.

“I wish he would do something about that tree,” Rei tells him flatly. “It just wakes sad memories.”

He turns to look at the tree stump, surprised that it takes a moment to realize what she’s talking about.

He’d been about 9 years old, and when attacking Shouto did not work, he’d burned down that tree in a fit of rage, knowing exactly how much that tree meant to his parents, as they had been wed under it, in a time when they must have been happy, or as happy as they could have been.

🌺.

“Why’d you never take out the tree?” He asks his father one night after dinner, the two of them alone in the kitchen.

“The same reason I will always carry these scars, even if they could be healed.” He points to the scarring on his face. “It serves as a reminder, a call to change, to protect what I have with the right means.”

“But you could plant a new tree.” He looks out into the garden, pondering it. “Or plant them around it. As if they’d hug it.”

“I’ll think about it. Or better, I’ll let you think about it. If you have a proposal on how to change the garden, you can come to me with it and we’ll go over it.”

“Or you could just let me do it. It’s my job after all.”

“Oh?” Enji raises his eyebrows in a challenge. “You’re feeling up to this?”

“Absolutely!”

“Well, it’s settled then. How long do you need?”

“A day. I’ve got the plan mostly ready anyway, I just need the right weather and a free day to get it all together.”

“Great. You should have both this weekend. Your mother and I will be out of the house anyway, as I’ve booked an onsen for a weekend getaway. You can convince your siblings to leave you alone if you need them out of the house. You can have my credit card to purchase what you need.”

“The limitless one?”

Enji smiles. “Let’s not go overboard, we don’t need flowers made from diamonds.”

🌺.

It’s Sunday morning, barely past 9 a.m. and he’s already sweating bullets. 

He’d thought that being able to sweat again would be a good thing - at least considering how well his skin grafts took to integrating into his body - but now he just feels plain disgusting. The garden looks like an absolute disaster after more than three hours going at it.

He’d started planting the tulips, realized that he wanted a peony bush in the middle of it, and had to dig some of them back out. 

The stone path he’d wanted to relocate is now a heap of dirty stones in one corner and he’d managed to knock over the bag of fertilizer, spilling its contents everywhere.

He feels himself getting frustrated. And tired. This work is harder than he’d imagined it to be.

-

He decides to take a breather, regretting not talking the plan through with you yesterday when he’d had the chance. Just because he’d wanted to surprise you with the news on Monday, telling you proudly how great everything had worked out.

He ponders the problem from the kitchen sink, his second glass of water in hand. 

Hawks and Natsuo could be used as backup muscle, but he doubts they’d come willingly.

Shouto’s on patrol and Fuyumi’s out visiting a friend. 

What he really needs is someone who’d give him direction while letting him do his thing at the same time. What he really needs is you and while he’d never missed a Friday night, he’d kept his distance, or at least tried to, in the weeks since that night.

He knows it’s a good thing. That doesn’t mean he has to like it.

You pick up after the first ring.

“Hello?”

“Hi. Remember how you said I could call you if I ever had a plant emergency?”

“Of course. What’s the matter?”

“That’s the thing. I got free reign on redesigning our garden and it’s… well, it’s looking a bit awful right now.”

“Just a bit? That’s good news then.” He can hear you moving in the background.

“Very funny. I know today’s your free day but would you mind taking a look? I promise you won’t have to work, you can just sit back on the terrace and tell me what I have to do.”

“It’s no problem, Touya-kun. Just tell me your address.”

-

He realizes, probably five seconds before you ring the bell, that you might have no idea how rich the Todorokis really are. 

But if you feel out of place in your scuffed-up trainers and grass-stained clothes, you’re not letting it show.

Touya explains his plan to you while he shows you the garden, pointing out what he’s already done and what he still has to do.

You nod and nod, look around and pinch the earth just like he’d done and he feels a little proud that he’d copied you without knowing.

Finally, you step up to him and point at the heap of stones.

“You wash them and put them where you want them. After that you take on one part of the garden after the other, minimizing trampling over done work. You’re a little early on the tulips but they should do well. Peonies are a bit risky at this spot and the way you’re planning it, you’re leaving no spot behind to actually use the garden.”

“Use it?” He blinks. “What do you mean?”

“Do you always sit on the terrace? Or do you sit on the lawn too?”

“Well, we used to play outside as children but we’ve grown out of that. I don’t know if Mom still sits outside.”

“Okay, that’s just as well. You just have to be aware of everyone’s needs if you plan for a whole family. What will you do about the tree?”

He should have known you would notice it the second you stepped outside. 

Even if you only point it out now he can tell you’re affected by it. He sighs.

“It burned down when I was about 9. Mom says it makes her sad and my father wants to keep it as a reminder. I… well, I wanted to plant things around it, so that it would seem like the plants would hug it, maybe?”

“Why?”

Your eyes are on him, your question digging deeper than he thought it could.

“When I… When I…” He coughs and tries again. “When I… almost died… at the war… I remember coming to, waking up to my family hugging me, as if they were holding me together, keeping me in one piece. I like that picture.”

You hum. 

“So now we know what your mother wants, what your father wants, and what you want. What about your siblings?”

“I don’t know. I didn’t ask.”

“You said that you felt like Touya had to die for Dabi to live and Dabi had to die for Touya to live but for your family, they were always one and the same. It’s the same with the tree, isn’t it? Whether it stays or it goes, it seems dead to all of you. Have you ever thought of the possibility of it being still alive?”

Touya knows, in theory, that you’re still talking about the tree. But it feels like you’re talking about him.

Has he ever thought of the possibility of himself being alive? 

-

You kneel down in front of the stump and hug it, your cheek resting on the place where it had been cut down. 

It feels personal, like you’re hugging him and you’re not hugging him until you’re starting to hum, a tune he’s heard so often he can hear himself tune in.

Under your arms the tree stump glows faintly until it grows and grows, two thick stems rising up and pushing your face away, entwining and circling each other, growing up and up and up. They’re the height of a bush, a person, taller now than the first tree had been, its foliage a friendly green that smiles down at him.

You sink to the floor next to it and he’s too slow to catch you, can only pick you up and carry you inside, your sleeping form fitting too well into his arms.

-

He washes the stones and places them, thinking about himself at age 9. He finishes his display of tulips and peonies and thinks about himself, waking up from a coma.

With every flower bulb he plants, and every bush he places, he thinks about the past.

It’s therapeutic, in a way, to feel himself come alive in this place.

He’d wondered if this was growing into a new obsession, but could it be an obsession when it feels so healthy?

By the time you step back out, he’d started placing the plants he wants to “hug” their family tree.

“Sleep well?” Touya asks when you kneel down next to him and dig your hands into the dirt.

“I’ve never been able to grow a tree in one sitting.” You explain to him, your voice soft. “But it wanted to grow.”

“Yeah.” He looks up at the foliage. “He’s been waiting for his chance long enough.”

“What are you going to name it?”

Toya looks at the two stems that are intertwined now. “Enji and Rei.”

You smile. “That’s a good name.”

taglist: @misfit-megumi @shoulmate @pixiesavvy @the2ndl @neko-my-cat @chelseaquake @tiredslepz @frozen-phoenix17

taglist is open, if you want to join, just mention it in a comment or send me a message.

[planerot]

Radiator Spring residents ranked on how trustworthy they are in the kitchen

(All these are intended to be humanized headcanons, but can be interpreted however you like. Also, quick content warning for food and a brief allusion to mold)

Flo - She literally owns a diner, (I did some googling and turns out, even though it's called Flo's V8 café, it's a diner. The disneyland website describes the IRL version in car's land as a 'Route 66-inspired diner' ) she makes the best food in town no questions asked. She's the one who makes everyone in Radiator Springs their birthday cakes and dinners each year, and has their favorite flavors and foods memorized by heart. If she catches wind that someone in town in feeling under the weather, that person will have a big pot of soup delivered to their doorstep before the end of the day. She is also very good about keeping her workspaces extremely clean due to the health and safety standards that come with running a diner. 10/10, she is the best by a very large margin.

Doc Hudson - During Doc's earlier years, back when he was still racing, he was a very mediocre cooking. He made stuff that was incredibly bland, boring, stupid easy, or a combination of all three. After his accident and moving to Radiator Spring, he was kind of forced to learn to make more interesting meals after eating nothing but mac and cheese, sandwiches, breakfast foods and other such things for a month straight and growing positively sick of it (because we all know his self isolating ass would NOT want to accept any invites to eat or, god forbid, risk accidentally socializing while at Flo's when he was fresh off a life changing crash). He, overtime, forced himself to learn how to actually cook and thus accidentally became one of the most talented cooks in Radiator Springs, second only to Flo.

Guido - He spent a lot of time in a tightknit, small Italian village, living with Mama Topolino, I feel it's very likely he picked up some tips, tricks and recipes during his time there. The vast majority of what he knows how to make is Italian food, but so long as he has a recipe, I think he could make anything.

Luigi - Basically the same as Guido. Only reason I put him below Guido is because he doesn't have the basically super human reflexes and motor control Guido has, thus making him more prone to spills and mess in the kitchen.

Red - The issue with writing any headcanons for Red is that he's more a gag then an actual character. I did a bunch of digging on his wiki page and all of it can be summed up to 'He likes flowers, is a firefigher and incredibly sensitive'...so I worked with that best I could. I think he'd be pretty decent at cooking since firefighters usually take turns cooking for their team, so anyone in that career usually has to learn to cook something actually edible. Red likely learnt how to cook during his very early days of firefighting before he moved to Radiator Springs. His dishes are definitely simpler, but that doesn't mean he can't make some very tasty, filling dishes. He takes enjoyment in serving his food to others and absolutely will burst into tears if someone insults his cooking.

Lizzie - Lizzie is the stereotypical baker grandma. A lot of the recipes she makes are pretty old, but that doesn't make them damn tasty. Her memory issues make baking a bit harder, but she still manages just fine. Baking helps keep her up and moving, even if it's only in her kitchen

Sally - She's never really had a knack for cooking and does her best from what people have taught her through the years. She can make a lot of really good pasta dishes, but other then that she doesn't really excel at anything.

Sheriff - Incredibly average. He's more the type to get food from Flo's or buy prepacked stuff then he is the type to actually make himself anything. When he does actually bother, all the stuff he makes is pretty good but absolutely nothing to write home about. He's more the type of person someone asks to pick up groceries for a meal then actually make the meal.

Fillmore - 100% more a baker then a cook. He first picked up baking to make weed brownies and ended up really enjoying the whole process. His recipes are very hit or miss though since he likes trying to make his desserts more healthy in some way. Sometimes this means they just taste a little off, and sometimes this means they taste like he just tossed sugar and cocoa powder in a bowl with some dried hay and baked it. He is also a hazard in a kitchen since he sometimes he gets munchies while high and will completely forget stuff in the oven, thus leading to multiple fire alarm scares.

Ramone - God bless his heart, but this man can barely cook. Flo has tried to teach him, but he just cannot seem to quite get it, often burning things, adding to much seasoning or accidentally forgetting ingredients. He loves spending time with Flo in the kitchen, so he gets relegated to vegetable peeling or pot stirring, which he very happily does because it means he gets to hang out with his amazing wife. The one thing he does excellent at is decorating. It took him a couple tries to get the technique down, but he is an amazing cake decorator, his years of painting cars meaning he has a scarily steady hand and very keen artistic eye. Flo always lets him decorate the cupcakes/cakes when she makes them for people's birthdays and they always turn out gorgeous.

Sarge - The issue with Sarge is that he refuses to toss anything out. He isn't good at cooking at all. That man does not give a shit how black his scrambled eggs are or how his chicken wings could probably be used as bricks, he will eat them. Whenever someone asks why he eats obviously terrible food, he just says something about how this is nothing compared to how terrible food was in the military. He's grown an iron stomach and hates wasting food even when it would probably be better for his health just to toss out the suspiciously fuzzy loaf of bread.

Lightning - He has mostly lived his adult life living off of fast food, microwave dinners, canned soup and whatever he can eat when people invite him over for dinner. He could probably be a very competent chef if he was taught how to, but he is a bit to embarrassed to admit it to someone else.

Mater - Do not let him near a kitchen he WILL burn it down. For the love of god he is clumsy as fuck and will somehow seriously injure himself or anyone if left to his own devices. He likes the idea of cooking for himself and his friends, but in practice it usually ends with either a fire, a hospital visit, or some horrid combination of both.

[astroyongie]

Aespa April Reading 2024

Note: please take it lightly

Karina

Love: As I have said on discord, I do believe that Karina is still dating that actor and that the news released were simply to shut the public's annoying comments about their relationship. his strong presence is still all over her energy and she doesn't seem to be heart broken whatsoever 

Career: She is a little confused and upset that her dating news have affected her image and the group’s. She bçames herself a little but she is also upset with the management team of the company for allowing this to come out more than it should have been. Karina is the type that doesn't like to tangle her love life with her professional one

Self: She is doing okay, mentally and physically she is doing fine. Karina is also building  a lot of character within herself and she has been feeling less and less patient when it comes to mistreatment and unfairness 

Giselle

Love: Things between her and the person she was seeing (and which was exclusive) is finished. Giselle is rather heartbroken by it because she was starting to get attached and develop feelings but that neither person has decided to call it quits. she is rather on a more sad energy due to this set back 

Career: She is trying to focus on her career, however it feels like Giselle wants to try something new for her (she wants to try other stuff and not only singing and dancing). i have no idea if that project of hers will come to fruition but for now she is trying to get some opportunities involving this new page on her career

Self: Her mental health is tangled with a lot of thoughts that aren't good for her. She often has negative self-talk and she is restraining herself for no reason. There’s a lot of psychosomatic reaction from her body that are just her emotional side manifesting 

Winter

Love: Nothing has changed since February. Winter is still dating the same person and still having complications in her relationship with them. due to the over codependency they have both enabled (trauma bounded perhaps) and also the arguments and miscommunication that are making the relationship complicated. but none of them wants to call it quits. 

Career: She isn't very happy with her current situation at her work. It feels like she's a little tired with her schedules and that it feels too repetitive for her (since she wants something new for her career and also an opportunity to show more sides of her idol image). Winter is also dream fed by her sponsor which isn't helping 

Self: Both her body and her mind are on the verge of collapsing. I feel like she hasn't been eating much and the pressure and responsibilities down on her shoulders could make her break at any moment. she has too much too unpack and havent had the opportunity to princess anything 

Ningning

Love: Girly is still dating the same person she was seeing in february and everything is going fine between them. She is secure financially and emotionally and they also have a good relationship altogether. There isn't much to add in this other that she is happy and fulfilled. 

Career: Ningning is also probably the only one that is rather satisfied with her current status. She ain't wishing for more and she is happily content with what she has at the moment. i don't feel like she is eager for more because she knows the work it requires and therefore she prefers to enjoy things as they are now 

Self: She is okay, both mentally and physically. She is working a lot on herself and on her skills as well. Ningning is someone that keeps improving day by day, as an artist but also as a human as she wants to be the best version of herself.

[arietisstarowl]

Edit: PLEASE REBLOG IF YOU CANT HELP. ALSO. I am willing to provide whatever proof I can for yall but like the only thing I can really prove is the situation with my mom bc documentation? Like idk how to prove verbal and mental abuse unless i just sit there and record it one day which is like really sus and likely to cause more issues?

Hullo! Sorry to come back with such news, but I seem to need a bit of help, so with a bit of a push from some friends, I finally decided to make this post. I need to move out into my own place ASAP. My mother and I live in a very toxic situation. It's gotten to the point where it's draining her mental health so much that she can't even stay out of the hospital. Her anxiety (and possibly her depression too considering she won't eat) spikes so much because of our situation that her physical health is deteriorating too. Yes, I am also a target of this toxicity, but I'm a bit more emotionally distant than her so I can ignore it easier,for a while at least. So, the plan would obviously be to move out ASAP. Problem is, she lost her job due to her frequent hospital visits, so it's all on me. Well, I have a good enough job to keep an apartment after moving in, the catch is, I need the down payment, FAST. Because of my credit being VERY bad my mother recommends saving up a few months rent before trying. So that's what I'll do. Any thing helps, from donations to commissions, or even sharing this post around. I don't know how to set up a go fund me, so instead, I'll just link my other methods. I'm uncertain if you can just do single payments on Patreon but maybe if people actually join, I'll modify the rewards a bit there, as I don't really feel good asking for free money--

Anyway,Even if you can't help financially, sharing this around also works. I appreciate that too ♥︎

[chiyoso]

𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐋 𝐈𝐍𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍

• BEFORE YOU INTERACT. know that you are entering a domain of jjk-ccentric aesthetics, (satoru coded) heavy scaramouche and satosugu simping, and will be interacting with a blog user who, unfortunately, strives for perfection when it comes to her edits, and especially her stories.

• INTERACTIONS. tough subject considering my constant burnout that makes me all distant n' stuff, BUT I PROMISE YOU, i'm not the type of mutual who ignores on purpose. for context, actually, i wasn't like this back then, but considering my mental health these days, i've been less active, less interactive, and etc SOLELY because of this unwanted stress, and if you still plan on sticking around, thank you genuinely.

╰► AND I DON'T MIND INTERACTING WITH ALL AGES. only except; if you are a minor who runs a nsfw blog, producing explicit content, with utmost strictness and big sisterly love, please, get that case away from me.

• DO NOT INTERACT IF. you become weak to mentions of; blood, heavy descriptions of fighting, injuries, murder, war, death, mental health, sensitive and heavy topics, relationship triggers, traumatic events, suicide, age gaps, cheating, vulgarity, and many more — all these fall under the warning category of dead dove.

╰► I DON'T WANT YOU INTERACTING WITH ME knowing these things will make you uncomfortable, i'm thinking of your physical and mental health over here, and over mine.

• MUTUALS. *sighs dreamily* fuck i love you. i love you. thank YOU for following me back, thank YOU for interacting with my burned out ass at all. god, thank you and i love YOU and thank YOU for being patient with me, im so fucking honored to be mutuals with you, even in my silence or inactivity, thank you, i love you so much, you're so special.

CHIYOSO𝐇𝐔𝐁 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐃𝐔𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍

✐ FANDOMS I'M IN.

jujutsu kaisen, genshin impact, undead unluck, honkai star rail, honkai impact 3rd, frieren, demon slayer, tokyo revengers, attack on titan, welcome to the ballroom, haikyuu, blue locke, mystic messenger, obey me, tears of themis, love & deepspace, the ssum, epic seven, wuthering waves, zenless zen zero, and more weeb things. / ··· tba.

✐ CHARACTERS I'M WRITING FOR.

gojo satoru, geto suguru, scaramouche, wanderer, alhaitham, cyno, lyney, neuvillette, pantalone, dottore, undead (andy), fushiguro toji, fushiguro megumi, kento nanami, ryoumen sukuna, muzan kibutsuji, shinzugawa sanemi, rengoku kyojuro, rengoku shinjuro, ken ryuguji (draken), hanma shuji, blade, jing yuan, welt yang, dan heng, nanook, lan, argenti, gepard landau, luka, dr. veritas ratio.

✐ GENRES/TAGS I'LL WRITE.

nsfw, sensitive and heavy topics, female reader, breeding, degrading, cum kinks, praise, fluff, angst, mental illnesses i have (e.g. depression), comfort, no comfort, headcannons, thirsts, drabbles, submissive, dominant, hate sex, somnophillia, non-con, overstimulation, public fucking, masturbation, age gap (21+ reader obv), violence (for plot), aphrodisiacs, possessiveness, obsessive tendencies, fighting, realistic, modern au, smau, death, trauma, crossovers, dumbification, husband/wife, older characters, minority (only purely platonic), dark content, pregnancy, cheating, mental health, personal letters, song recommended fics, and more things that fall into the warning category of dead dove.

✐ YOU RECOMMEND THIS YOU'RE DELETED.

incest, stepcest, true yandere, cuckhold, scat, piss, irl politics, polygamy relationships, male!reader, trans!reader, eating disorders, disorders i'm not allowed to discuss.

╰► TO AVOID CONFLICT in regard to not writing for the opposite sex and the transgender pov, i simply cannot. i'm inexperienced in that field, and even i struggle a lot when writing the female pov as well.

understand that i am not able to because i am female myself, and even if i do take the route to research, it wouldn't feel comfortable for me, and i'm bound to get things wrong on some aspects. that's all. ⸻ (quick link to go to my inbox)

𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒 AND 𝐀𝐍𝐒𝐖𝐄𝐑𝐒

• AGED UP CHARACTERS?

uh, well. i am kinda tempted to write for aged up for some characters, but ONLY to those who are closest to my age like fushiguro megumi, 1-2 year gap of me and etc. as for characters like yanqing, or anyone else around his age, i'm not one to age up ones that are canonically young until said to be older, with that established, i'll be only writing platonic for characters like him.

• DO YOU WRITE—?

yeah. probably. go back to chiyosohub productions section and skim through the popular genres area, thats the shit i feel comfortable to write. ask for confirmation before requesting.

• ARE THESE REALLY YOUR EDITS?

mmhm, all of the media, dividers, banners and layouts are all from me and edited by me, please don't copy what took ages for me to finally settle on, thank you. besides, every edit has a well hidden watermark and cleverly placed too by yours truly.

• REQUESTS/COMMISSIONS?

i'm not in the right mental state to fulfill requests quickly in contrast to other writers, however, do feel free to pitch in ideas and, i'm actually considering comms for my editing work, but lmk if you wanna support me that way.

• WHY'RE YOU SO SLOW AT POSTING/ANSWERS?

right, i'm someone who frequently struggles with mental health, i consistently deal with burnout, exhaustion and perfectionism, plus i'm trying to break the cycle of my people pleasing too. my most recent relationship broke me to the point where nothing mattered but him, so, i'm quite literally learning to love things again—writing for example.

i'm not gonna be perfect at it, but i'll always try to strive for the best. i'm also stressing out about the fact that as someone who took a few years to take a break from school life, then suddenly i'm plunging in into a world where you train as an adult? shit is actually not helping my geto-like spiral lmao.

tl;dr writer deludes herself with hot fictional men, anime and games, all while college fucks up my sleep schedule even more. that, and her motivation's in constantly in vacation.

hope that answers your curiousities, good fuckin' luck interacting with my ass LMAO — chiyoso.

[secretobsessionstuff]

Numb  

Got this request from @5sosxqueen

"Could you possibly do one with riley and madix, where they are out somewhere walking along a street probably window shopping of sorts and the riley suddenly gets dizzy and stumbles into the road right into oncoming traffic and the caretaker pulls him/her in just in the nic of time? Dizziness, fainting, and bonus points if they vomit on the caretaker right after due to the sudden movement."

Thanks for the lovely request and for being so patient!

Content Warning: Discussion of mental health issues, depression, shitty side effects of medication!!!

--------------------

“Where do you want to eat?” Madix asked, looking around at the stores and restaurants that lined Westcoombed Avenue. The sky was overcast with a slight drizzling rain. With much difficulty, he let go of his boyfriend’s hand long enough to check his watch. “We have two hours ‘til we have to be at the bar.” 

It was not a typical bar they were going to; it was a comedy bar. Madix preferred this type of bar because his new meds did not like to mingle with alcohol; the combination often created disastrous effects. The last time he woke up to see he’d blown a blood vessel in his eye from vomiting long and hard. 

The comedy bar was having an improv night, meaning he didn’t need to get drunk in order to smile. He wondered how potent the jokes would be and if they’d be enough to trick him into thinking he was adapting to his new normal. The anti-depressants were helping but he felt emotionally dead while taking them. And he wasn’t thrilled about the non-existent libido. 

Anyway, a night of shopping and comedy would surely fix all his problems! 

Actually, the shopping portion of their night was coming to an end. Madix and Riley walked lazily down the street with bags in their hands. Riley had bought new shoes that looked terribly uncomfortable to Madix, but he kept insisting that they were in style. With the way Riley tripped down the trendy strip of Toronto, you would have thought that he was already breaking in the new shoes. 

Madix held onto his boyfriend a little tighter. “Did you forget how to walk?” 

“Maybe.” Riley looked down at his two left feet, almost anxiously. “Can we walk slower?” 

“Sure…” Madix said with a frown but slowed his pace considerably. “Everything okay?” He tried to catch Riley’s downturned gaze. 

“Uh—” Riley hesitated and licked his lips, apparently considering how or if he was going to answer. He let out a fatigued sigh. “I’m…a bit dizzy. It’s been a long day of standing.” 

Madix nodded “I also seem to recall you not eating very much at lunch.” 

“Yeah. I don’t know…” He grabbed the back of his neck, feeling the cold sweat on his skin. “My stomach feels funny.” 

“Since lunch?” When Riley replied with only a shrug, Madix’s frown deepened. “Why didn’t you say anything? You’ve been feeling bad all day!”

“And you’ve been feeling bad for months.” 

Madix sighed. So that’s what this was about. “Riley—” 

“—This is the first time in a while that you wanted to get out of the house and do something. I thought your meds were finally starting to work—that you were starting to feel like yourself again—I didn’t want to take this away from you.” 

Madix stopped walking suddenly, bringing the two of them to a halt in the middle of the sidewalk. Before the other pedestrians could bump into them, he pulled Riley to the edge where a bench and a bus stop blocked them from the road. 

“Can I be honest?” Madix asked, grabbing Riley by the shoulders as they sat down on the cold bench. 

“Please.” 

“I don’t think I’m going to feel normal for a long time. I think the meds are going to take some getting used to—hell, they might not even be the right ones.” 

“I know.” Riley let out an exasperated sigh. He didn’t like the way the lights were playing tricks with his eyes. Madix’s face was inches from his own, but he could hardly keep the sight from blurring. He hated feeling so unfocused. “I know all this. I’m the one who told you to be patient with the Prozac.” 

“So, what’s the problem?” 

“Ugh, I don’t even know anymore.” Riley closed his eyes, feeling like the world was spinning around this cold bench. On the inside of his eyelids, he could still see the fuzzy halos around the streetlamps and the car lights. “I’m sorry. My head hurts. It’s making me nauseous and disorientated.”

“That’s alright. I’m more than okay with going home if you’re feeling sick.” 

“You sure?” 

“Absolutely.” What Madix didn’t say was that he was almost happy about ending the night early. They did their shopping. He had an afternoon of breathing in the not-so fresh air of the city. That was good enough for one day. His bones ached for his bed and his head ached for the dark. “I promise I’ll force myself out of the house another time.” 

As Riley let go of the tension in his shoulders—a sign that he was relieved to be going home—Madix took his hands in his.

“But Riley, listen…” Madix began. Then stopped. It was such an unexcepted stop. Any normal person would take that word listen as their cue to let him speak. 

Riley waited a beat (being a normal person and all), but Madix didn’t carry on. “What is it?” 

“I was taking to Dakota about this. Then Doctor Marlow…” Madix trailed off again. The cars and busses that passed by on the street tugged at his attention. His head moved with the vehicles as if attached by a string. Madix opened his mouth, then closed it.

Riley touched his leg. “Babe?” 

Madix shook his head and made eye contact with his boyfriend again. “How bad is your head? We can stop by a drug store.” 

“Madix!” 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry. See that’s what I’m trying to tell you.” 

“We’ll try harder. I’m having a hell of a time following.” Riley pinched the bridge of his nose. He felt a throbbing pain beneath his fingers that travelled up his forehead. He imagined a red, raw line bisecting his face. It reminded him that his brain had to ignore the constant sight of his nose. Well, now his brain was no longer ignoring it which made the headache double in intensity. He was glad to not be wearing his glasses because it would have been yet another visual stimulus. 

Madix laughed at himself. “I should be worrying about myself, right?”

“Well, not worrying. Just working on yourself.” 

“Yes, exactly.” Madix looked down and tapped a rhythm on his leg. “It’s really hard to worry—work—on myself, while also worrying about you.” He switched to tracing his finger around his pant pocket. “Like now, I would be feeling so much better if I wasn’t stressing over the fact that you’ve been feeling sick all day and I didn’t know.” 

“But if I’d told you earlier, you’d be in the same position as you are right now.” 

“It would have been easier.” 

“How?” 

Madix threw his hands up. “I don’t know. It just would. It’s been established that my mental state is a little wonky, so don’t make me explain my thought process.” He finally looked up at his boyfriend and was able to see the haziness in Riley’s eyes. Madix gave him a sad smile and touched his cheek. “At the very least you’d be warm in bed.” 

Riley leaned into the touch. “That sounds really nice.” 

“Then let’s get off this wet bench and go home.” Madix’s attention went to his phone as he checked the subway schedule. 

Riley stood up without issue, lulling both of them into a false sense of safety. The real danger came when he had to put one foot in front of the other. Maybe it was due to the psychological nature of their talk, but Rorschach inkblots suddenly bled across his vision. Splotchy black butterflies fluttered passed his pupil. 

Not but two steps later, he was stumbling towards the road. The buildings and far off skyscrapers fell on their side. Westcoombe avenue sunk below the horizon as he began to faint. Even if there was time, he couldn’t have said anything to alert Madix of his impending fall because nausea filled his throat. 

The last thing Riley saw before the darkness took over was the reflection of headlights in the puddles of rainwater on the road. He heard a car honk its horn, but he could not reverse his downward trajectory. The darkness spread and he waited for—

“Riley, oh my God!” Madix shouted as he yanked on the boy’s limp arm. 

It was not graceful. Time did not slow. Their eyes did not meet as the reality of what transpired dawned on them. One second, Riley was falling towards the road, and the next second he was being pulled backwards. He spun awkwardly and caught himself with a hand on Madix’s chest. A rush of cars caused a gust of wind to lift his coat. He was suddenly freezing and shaking.

Madix’s eyes were puddles of shock and worry. His pupils went back and forth rapidly, trying to find sense in Riley’s unfocused ones. He kept his hand wrapped tightly around his boyfriend’s bicep. Words would not come to his lips. 

Riley wobbled in Madix’s embrace. His eyes drooped as if he were drunk. “What was that about making you worry?” he slurred out just before vomiting down Madix’s chest. 

His head lolled forward as the sick poured from his mouth. He felt as if he were still being spun around from the road. Nighttime colours of navy blues, taillight red, and black inky rain slashed across his vision. And his mind kept replaying that dizzying motion. Fainting, Falling, Spinning. 

Spinning

And spinning

Madix’s grip was strong. Unyielding, much like the traffic that would not have stopped in time if Riley had kept falling.

More vomit fell past his lips, coating Madix’s shoes. 

“Oh, whoa!” Madix tensed up as he got splashed. But he did not let go of Riley’s arm. He could feel the boy shaking. “Easy, love, I’ve got you.” 

“Ugh, my head,” Riley groaned before an empty heave tore his chest in half. His whole body was sore. To keep from crushing his useless legs, he held onto Madix’s shoulders. “I’m spinning.” 

“You’re okay. You’re not moving, I promise.” 

“I need to sit down.” 

“Back to the wet bench, it is.” Madix said, guiding his wobbly boyfriend. They sat down slowly. “See, see. Everything is okay.” 

“Is it?” 

Madix bit his lip. No. “Yes.” You just fainted in the street. “You’re just a little dizzy.” 

“Did I pass out?” 

“For a second.” Madix fussed with Riley’s jacket, straightening it, and dusting off tiny droplets of water. He chuckled because it seemed to be the only way he knew how to cope with what just happened. “You bastard, scared me.” 

Riley spoke quietly, with his brows knit together as if he weren’t really sure of anything just then. “I saw a car coming towards me.” Everything he said somehow sounded like a question. 

Madix cocked his head. “I don’t think they saw you.” His heart jackhammered against his rib cage. He certainly wasn’t feeling numb anymore. “Fuck, I’m glad I noticed in time.” 

Riley moaned and closed his eyes. “Sorry…I-I’m—”

“You don’t have to say anything,” Madix said quickly. 

“Did I throw up on you?” 

 “You keep asking questions you know the answer to.” 

Riley cracked open his aching eyes just enough to see that he did know the answer. There was a stain of vomit on Madix’s coat. He closed his eye quickly once more. “I didn’t mean to.” 

“Don’t you think I know that?” Madix said, looping his arm around Riley’s. This time he wasn’t going to let go. “Just hold on to me. I’m getting you home in one piece.” 

[anoddopal]

✨🐇 NIMBOSTRATUS 🐇✨

Two of Bun-Bun Silva's [Insert/Sona] beloved pets!

General Info

There are those who assume they represent the “Bun-Bun” portion of Silva's name.

Both are a subspecies of Lapin [Lapahn], similar to those found on Drum island. Though these two in particular have far more lagomorph-like attributes than their arctic counterparts.

Technically omnivores; they mostly eat hay/vegetation but won’t turn their noses up at meat.

Their unique anatomy allows them to be both bipedal and quadruped; they can move about much faster when down on all fours.

While still classified as animals, they’re much smarter than most people anticipate. All communication they have with humans/humanoids can only be inferred [though Silva can speculate what they mean better than anyone]. However, they can speak directly with other animals, Zo.an Type De.vil Fruit users, and Tony To.ny Ch.opper!

Nimbus

Strongly resembles a Netherland Dwarf. [Stands at roughly 5’ on hind legs; not including ears!]

The oldest of the two, yet somehow he’s still referred to as the “Baby Brother”.

Prone to making the silliest of faces, usually in the form of scowls and grimaces. Silva jokes that he ate the “Frown Frown Fruit”, and that’s why he has such an adorably sour expression.

Is Stratus’ shadow, essentially. He follows her everywhere. It’s only on rare occasions that he leaves her side.

Like Stratus, he loves his ‘Mama’ very much, but he also tends to find Silva’s fussing embarrassing.

Is a bit of a menace, but he’s much more discreet about it when compared to his ‘big’ sister. No rope or nautical knot is safe from his teeth. The little guy can’t help but slice through the damn things…

Nimbus is very particular about the appearance of his loved ones, and will take it upon himself to groom them to perfection! Be warned- your eyebrows WILL be on fleek by the time he’s done with you!

Much more content to fade into the background. Doesn’t care to be in the spotlight, but he does love attention from certain individuals.

Overall a standoffish, suspicious little guy. But this means having his trust/favor is all the more impactful. Nimbus is loyal to his core.

A very good judge of character! …. For the most part…

Stratus

Strongly resembles a Rex. [Stands at roughly 6’ on hind legs; not including ears!]

The brains, muscle, and leader of this outfit.

Wears a mummified “lucky human’s foot” around her neck, it’s a twist on the belief some humans hold that a severed rabbit’s foot will bring them luck. Hey! She’s just evening the odds!

TOTAL MAMA’S GIRL. LUFFS HER MAMA SO MUCH!

A criminal. Has a bounty on her head that rivals that of many notorious pirates. Said bounty only continues to increase over time, with the most significant increase occurring when she successfully broke into Im.pel Down [assisting in the  catastrophe Mo.nkey D. Lu.ffy orchestrated that freed hundreds of prisoners or wait, was it Bu.ggy who cooked up THAT part of the scheme? Whatever- her true intent was to go after Sir Cro.codile regardless] and when she fought on Wh.iteb.eard’s side at Ma.rinef.ord [though her primary goal was to help protect her mama]. There is debate as to whether she’s sentient enough to warrant such a large amount of berries…?

Needs attention. DEMANDS attention! Positive attention? Yes!!!! Negative attention? YESSSS!!!!

Is capable of feats that are… unexplainable, or have no context beyond a simple explanation. Silva insists Stratus knows all the secrets to the universe. Hell, she probably somehow knows where the One Pi.ece IS. But will she ever tell anybody? LMAO, of COURSE not!

Probably has some form of Haki.

An agent of chaos, yet she’s also an entity that embodies comfort and love. For as much discord as she causes, she also brings great peace of mind. She’s an imperative regulator of Silva’s mental health. ESR: Emotional Support Rabbit.

[cqthqrtic]

Yandere Headcannons: Kunikida Doppo.

a/n: hope you enjoy! requested by @your-fave-jewish-magical-girl !! also i wanted to say that this is the last yandere piece i’ll be writing. yandere isn’t something i really enjoy writing anymore ://

warnings: stalking, non-sexual violations of boundaries and consent, delusion, loss of agency, kidnapping, captivity, abuse, controlling behaviors.

!! dark content, read at your own risk !!

kunikida doppo.

🪐 Kunikida genuinely believes he’s doing the right thing when he kidnaps you and stalks you. He genuinely believes that keeping you captive is keeping you safe. He’s a protective delusional type that’s cracked underneath the pressure of witnessing the worst parts of humanity and the world.

🪐 He doesn’t trust your judgement in the slightest and kind of looks down on you. He thinks you’re too naïve to live without him.

🪐 Extremely controlling, down to what food you eat and what time you sleep. He’s obsessed with keeping you healthy and keeping you in a routine that he believes will benefit you.

🪐He doubles checks your clothing to make sure nothing strange is sewn in, refuses to let you eat food that he didn’t cook, won’t let you do chores he deems is too dangerous. He goes overboard as you can see💀

🪐 He also has cameras all over his apartment. He had to move out of the dorms right before kidnapping you so that the others wouldn’t know.

🪐Kunikida keeps you on a strict and tight schedule. You wake up when he tells you to, eat when he tells you to, and sleep when he tells you to. When he’s not there, you’re basically a housewife. You clean a little, cook a little (not really, you just use the microwave and electric kettle), read some of the books he bought for you, and watch some movies.

🪐 You get no internet access. Kunikida doesn’t trust you enough for that and he worries about hackers, predators, and scammers. It’s not until Katai tells him about software that lets parents keep an eye on their kids that Kunikida considers letting you have some internet access, mostly for things like netflix and spotify.

🪐 He won’t ever drug you, he’s far too afraid of that he’ll accidentally kill you. The way he got you in his grasp was by lying to you about a threat and luring you to his apartment. You really should be careful about whose home you go to in the middle of the night.

🪐 If you were ever in danger, Kunikida would snap. Once again, his obsession with you is driven by his trauma surrounding his work and all the things he’s witnessed. He’s able to justify all of his actions with the idea that it’s for your safety. If you were ever in danger, he’d break. Kunikida would kill and kill until you’re safe in his arms.

🪐Afterwards, he would become even more vigilant with your safety, not even letting you leave your room and keeping you chained to a wall. He’d even consider having Yosano chip you.

🪐 Speaking of Yosano, she’s the only member of the ADA he allows you to meet. Ranpo would automatically know what’s happening if he saw you (assuming he doesn’t already), Dazai’s a weirdo and Kunikida doesn’t know what he’ll do, Kunikida respect’s the president too much and is afraid of what he’ll say if he knew about you, and the rest he simply doesn’t trust.

🪐 He has Yosano do weekly health checkups with you in his apartment to make sure you’re in tip top shape. Kunikida will be damned if you die from disease or failing health.

🪐Yosano probably has suspicions but she’ll keep quiet, mostly for Kunikida’s sake. She knows he won’t hurt you.

🪐Kunikida keeps her away as much as he can though, out of fear she’ll take you away.

🪐 Kunikida really doesn’t like to hurt people so he’d avoid harming anyone in general. He’ll definitely be willing to intimidate anybody who he deems unsafe (which is like 95% of the population), but he’s not really gonna kill anyone if he doesn’t deem it necessary.

🪐Depending on who the person is, Kunikida miiight brutally maim the person though lol.

🪐 He keeps you extremely isolated and almost completely inside. He will let you go outside under his watchful eye, mostly in isolated places full of nature like the woods or some closed off beach early in the morning.

🪐 Kunikida would sooner carve a pound of flesh out of his body than EVER give up on you. You’re his ride or die, one of the last threads of attachment he has to the mortal plane.

🪐Remember, the reason for his obsession is because he needs something to keep him going after all the horrors he’s witnessed. Kunikida is a very idealistic person as we know and with that comes the weight of knowing that his ideals will be constantly tested. Eventually the weight will break him and that’s why you’re his lifeline. You give him the strength to shoulder the weight of his ideals so he must do anything and everything to protect you. No cost is too great if it’s you.

🪐 Should you ever find yourself in a relationship, whether it’s budding or well established, Kunikida will go absolutely batshit bonkers with jealousy. He’ll tell himself he’s worried that the other person has bad intentions but to be honest, he’s just coping LMAO.

🪐Kunikida will find time to stalk and eventually interrogate your lover to see what kind of trickery they’re doing. If he can’t find any dirt on your lover, he’ll create it. He’ll convince himself that it’s for your own good! That everyone in the world is out to get you and the only one who could treat you right is him.

🪐In actuality though, he’s coping and seething; the man is “in love” (read: unhealthily obsessed) with you and wants you all to himself but can’t morally justify any of his actions with such a selfish reason.

🪐Overall, Kunikida is less of a threat physically and more of a threat mentally. He’s a sufffocating yandere who leaves no room for your own agency. But he is relatively tame in comparison to the others and he will never physically hurt you.

[alazyparallelworld]

battlestation bed

i ramble ★ frequenters and those who have read my extended about page may know that - i'm, bedbound - i eat, drink, play, and work in my bed. i live in my bed; my anatomy has bled into my bed.

this sounds... very edgy...! and tragic. but, this is, an 'informative' kind of post... i wouldn't talk abt it as oft as i do, if it brought me despair.

i don't mind questions, concerns, w/e about this - i don't plan to 'edit' this post whatsoever. this is to serve as a... 'quick reference' or summary.

content warning: detail of chronic pain, implications of neglect, severe health problems.

if you'd like to skip over the explanation, of the Why am i bedbound, start at: bc. Every Step. is Agony. i... LIVE IN BED...!! WE ARE HERE NOW.

so--! my physical ailment is, you know. Chronic Pain. i have an underdevelopment disorder both physically n mentally... as a result, some bones in both of my knees, 'grind' together. i've lost a moderate amount of cartilage in my left leg, and less so in my right.

there is no 'fixing' nor 'preventing' my problem. eventually, my right leg will catch up to my left. my medication deals to lessen the symptoms, as physical therapy, medications, injections, surgery, have been ineffective. furthermore, i have the slightest flat feet - which, ah, doesn't help matters.

walking brings me pain. throughout my life, i have had these... Pangs, burning sensations. my childhood was very anti-medicine; i never saw the doctor, for a Regular Checkup, until i was 21. until i was - 19 - i believed this agony was... normal!

the reveal came as, a nonquestion to my friends. in context of sleep. "well, you know, your body tells you when you're tired... when your legs flare up and even standing hurts, it's, 'time for bed,' you know?"

their reaction was unexpected. because, for me, that 'time for bed' pain was daily.

i had no reason to suspect this was abnormal. and i enjoyed - very, very much so - running, i loved the feeling of it. i ran every day, for hours on end. and this... obsession, is what kept my legs from fully atrophying. i saved myself thru such rigorous exercise, while in a double-edged sword way, making them worsen earlier, as i was busying the bones that grind against themselves.

upon intake, examinations... in gentle words, i was told, "expect to never run again." and - i was 21. i knew then my pain was bad, but the emotional pain of... Giving Up, my primary coping mechanism, was worse. even typing this near brings me to tears, ah. anyways...!

i began, an antiflam, and then a knee brace, and then physical therapy... and then injections... then Creams... further physical therapy... strengthened pain medication. a Surgery. Water and regular physical therapy. to this day, the only thing that brings me 'relief,' is thru numbness via marji.

my insurance won't approve of - a replacement - per my age. even then, the likelihood of success is low. it's estimated that sometime in my 30s, i'll be dependent on a wheelchair.

bc. Every Step. is Agony. i... LIVE IN BED...!! WE ARE HERE NOW.

i live alone, with no friends or family to speak of. as i have no support system, am unemployable, and have state insurance - i have a medical caregiver. she is here 5 days out of the week, and approved for nearly 100 hours of the month...

she is the one who takes care of my - food and water. most of my meals are either prepped, needing only reheating or hands-off frying and such, or cooked for me the day of.

my activities of daily living (ADLs) are helped by her - food making, housework, hygiene, medications, and the like. she is my transport to necessary in-person appointments - and, well, keeps me from going mad due to my total isolation otherwise.

but! she is not live-in, and there are days of - incidents! she can't come...! so-and-so emergency, or mix-up, and the like. i am VERY dependent on my caregiver, but not totally... so, how do i function, alone?!

food and water - aforementioned, most of my meals are prepped. otherwise, i do 'low effort,' things like microwavable meals... and, you know, the odd delivery. >>;; re water (soda, lol), i have beside table, where there's a mini fridge. i make sure to keep a good stock of it in both of my fridges. n there is a bedside trashcan, where i dispose of any waste.

hygiene - ...i am not the best at this... i have to be helped into showering, specifically. i have a shower chair, as i cannot stand under such water pressure. i've considered dry shampoo for my hair, and i give myself the occasional wet-wipe bath. better than nothing, after all.

i have spare clothing - my robe, extra pants, etc always in my bed so in hot/cold flashes, i can redress easily.

a tv tray is slipped between my bed and the wall, which i have an organizer on - inside, it holds my medicine, glasses, wet wipes, etc.

locomotion - for when i have NO CHOICE, but to walk, i keep it scheduled. feeding the cats is conjoined with, 'food time,' or, bathroom trip. i also have a roller chair nearby - so, when necessary.. whhheee...! my apartment is small, w/ wooden floors, so i can foot-drag my way around. I Don't Like Doing This.

when outside, i am supported by my knee brace. it lessens the pain in the moment, but only enough to function for short-term and infrequent outsides. for grocery store trips, i tend to use mobility scooters... smth i, again, Dislike. i am considering inquiring about a power scooter, post my next procedure, so i can go outside more regularly. in my particular case, a cane would not be of much help and would cause further dependency on my right leg.

pet care - Water fountain! re: food, as aforementioned, i make it a 'two birds, one stone,' affair... and play - they have e/o, and Believe Me that they make their own fun - but automatic toys, too. nozomi-tan (alias) has been taught to bring toys into bed, so i can play with him there. hikaru (also alias) has learned to turn on the automatic toys by herself... many times, i am awoken, to the sound of it buzzing. Smart girl.

furthermore.. it's more that nozomi-tan takes care of ME... he is insistent, knowing of when tot ell me. Wake up - time to get up - so I don't depress in bed forever. My bathroom anxiety, he follows me there... and the like. this was his purpose.... soiled by, mm, someone else treating him more like a pet. But he is still very good at grounding me in bouts of depression, PTSD, and the like.

i believe that is most of the. 'how do you live/function?' questions...?

now. For optimization. two years ago, i was in good fortune enough to buy a relatively good Gaming Laptop, and have upgraded its RAM and storage since. thanks to public assistance, i can afford wifi... so, i, have internet. This is my base entertainment.

...as i, dont leave the house sans medical appointments, i am... Always online. Keyboard warrior. anyways -

i watch things, game, read things, write things, so on and so forth. I have consoles, but they need setup - as i stream/record things - so I game largely from here... bc of my hands, i use a controller so they do not. Claw Up. i have usb 2 and usb c cords running to my bed (as of today, w/ help, they're now snaked to my bed from the extension cord behind it), which is how i charge.. phone, headphones, tablet, controller, etc.

right in front of my bed, there is a large slab of a desk. this is where my TV is! very few things in my apartment need batteries. but, i have those - fancy - rechargeable batteries... so no worries about, replacing batteries in the tv remotes and the like. BUT! my tv here is a smart tv...! so i control it from my phone.

the tv tray - stated earlier - has an organizer wherein it holds the very basics. my meds, pens, the remote for my lamp, etc. my mood light is sat right atop of it, and it's where i rest my headphones as they're too bulky to fit inside the organizer itself.

the lap desk is where, i guess, the magic happens... as i would be chugging my laptop against the bedsheets, otherwise. it means i don't pain my legs from its weight, and i only have to rest my external keyboard on myself...

so. this is how. I Live from my Bed.

[astroyongie]

IVE May Reading 2023

Note: please take it with a grain of salt and enjoy ! 

Yujin

Love: it seems like she is once again in a relationship (started around February/March) and that she is quite happy about her situation. I don’t have much to say other to confirm that and also to say that she is walking on a cloud at the moment

Career: she seems to be very hopeful and extremely content with her career situation at the moment, not only is she getting tons of income but she is also securing opportunities for later and also have somo solo stuff. She knows her worth as an artist, however Yujin should just be careful with her jealousy

Health:

Physical: She needs to make sure she is having protected sexual activities

Mental: I feel that she gets easily emotional and agitated with things, so she needs to slow down a little. Yujin also does a lot of meditation to relax and focus

Gaeul

Love: Gaeul isn’t in a relationship but she has been seeing someone lately, and although her fling isn’t official she suffers a lot from it due to the dependency she created around this one person. She does anything they want and honestly this doesn’t seem very healthy

Career: She had a huge argument with one of the members and she came out of it not happy at all. Other than, her career is equally secure, a lot of money is coming to her as well and she is just so happy with everything. Gaeul is also working on solo projects and she has faith to built her own reputation

Health:

Physical: she is sick from something but I don’t know what. Other than that she needs to look out for lower backs and pelvic area

Mental: She is the type to suffer in silence

Rei

Love: Her situation is very complicated and I don’t know how to explain it without revealing much, but basically she is in a relationship at the moment, but it’s the kind to be such a bad influence and overall toxic to the point where she makes decisions about her health that aren’t good at all. Rei needs to be very very careful if she doesn’t want to have a scandal attached to her name

Career: For her career I see positivity and a lot of good opportunities coming for her through her managers and sponsors that can be only good for her artistic growth

Health:

Physical: She eats barely, she also is dealing with digestive issues

Mental: She has a lot of dark thoughts around her and she is definitely suffering emotionally

Wonyoung

Love: So it seems like Wonyoung has gave in on her crushes and she is currently dating someone, however ! This relationship is very discreet, quite a secret, because her company isn’t into letting her have a relationship (nor his her sponsor). But in any case she is trying It out and being giggly about it

Career: obviously there’s only good things behind Wonyoung, even more with the same sponsor energy behind her that gives her the most opportunities. Her career is balanced, she has been writing lycris and overall her solo projects are seeing true form. Her fame only keeps growing

Health:

Physical: she eats barely as well

Mental: She is constantly in state of fear, guilt and doubts

Liz

Love: It seems like Liz had her eyes on someone she got close with however this person rejected her after leading her on. So at the moment she is kinda annoyed. Also she was the one who had a fight with Gaeul and this was probably related to their relationships

Career: Things are nor good nor bad, because I see comparatively with the other members, that she didn’t received that much money since her financial growth is currently blocked. I also feel like she had worked a lot for some type of opportunity that was removed last minute. Liz however isn’t sad, she knows her luck will change eventually

Health:

Physical: She also doesn’t eat much

Mental: what people say online affects her a lot

Leeseo

Love: She is still dating however it looks like she haven’t been able to be with her partner that much, and lately their relationship is basically based on texting and calling each other rather than seeing each other. Also her family isn’t okay with it since they want her to focus on her career

Career: things are going well, she has the luck to have almost every member behind her and helping her with her projects but Leeseo still has to work a little and wait before her projects can come to light

Health:

Physical: she is dealing with quite some throat issue

Mental: She isn’t very well, and I also feel a lot of anger in general

[straightfromthetorturedpoetsdept]

i get so emotional thinking of how much taylor as recovered from her ED since 1989 era oh my god

I get so emotional thinking about much courage and acceptance she's displayed since lover era tbh. Like, I get so emotional when I think about the change from "I'm not in any proud of it but I used to not eat... just a little" to "I hosted parties and starved my body like Id be saved by a perfect kiss" like that chance in language alone makes me fucking emotional. Not only that but to write bigger than the whole sky and be able to name the specific trauma that really sent you down that ED rabbithole.... its fucking amazing and awe inspiring and beautiful.

I wish she was able to speak as freely as she wanted about her eating disorder and it makes me really uncomfortable the whole anti hero situation so much, you don't even understand. But I hope and pray that Taylor is not discouraged from speaking about her ED in the future because I love it so much and I find it so... comforting to know she deals with the same things I deal with and I just want her to know that there are people out there who understand her. Who get how painful the entire journey can be, who don't judge her for how she expresses the pain her ED causes her and who truly want to see her as healthy and happy as possible because she deserves to live, just like we all do.

I think it's so beautiful that she is able to make these songs about her ED and honestly, I would love for ts11 to be not solely ED related but more like mental health related in general. I love midnights but I think midnights is like a subtle tone shift teaser. I think she had the creative ability to really make some beautiful music, like yoyok and bigger than the whole sky, about her ED, her mental health and just her ability to overcome these very common human struggles and be happy and successful and healthy and recovered. I think it's so important in a time where actresses and singers are getting really thin again to have someone as powerful as taylor speak out against disordered eating.

I think her work with EDs is just beginning and I think in the near future, we are going to get more songs like yoyok and even this is me trying where we get to really go on an emotional journey with her and see how fame really fucked up her mental health. I think the next era of albums focusing on her fame in like almost a warning type of way would be so good for the young girls who are still discovering her music and who will listen to her newer stuff first.

I also would love to see taylor talk more about the confines of traditional gender roles and how that has inhibited her creative freedom to be as queer as possible but also as feminist as possible. I would love to see her talk more about how the men in her industry really fucked her over, because that would be a fantastic reservoir of content for her honestly and it'd help her heal even more.

I honestly think a lot of that is because of folkmore because she really brought the sad girl pandemic vibes with those albums but she also needed to really explore the ins and outs of the 1989 era in depth in order to heal properly. Like karlie obviously had/has an ED and they obviously fed off each other while they were dating and I think that really shines through in a lot of the fucked upness of the albums themselves. Like there is so much to unpack in folkmore that you could probably run a college course on those albums specifically because her time in 1989 and with karlie is so fundamentally linked with her trauma of meyer, fame, closeting, etc that they were doomed from the start.

That's why she's talking about how it's maroon in hindsight, because she thought they were golden but they weren't. They were fucked up and painful and just dysfunctional and it was never going to work out between the 2 of them.

Anyways, I would love to see more unpacking of 1989 era tbh.

[fontainebleau22]

Not sure which ones you've done yet but 🥺 🤡🛠💖🤗🎉

A great set of asks, thank you!

🥺 Is there a certain type of moment or common interaction between your characters that never fails to put you in your feels?

I’m a big fan of established relationships when I write, and I do always love to show private moments of trust and intimacy between a couple, when they’re hiding away from the world and completely content with their own little bubble of happiness.

🤡 What's a line, scene, or exchange you've written that made you laugh?

The whole of Box of Frogs never fails to make me laugh, which is the point of it; here’s an exchange from the start:

Goodnight pinched his brow. He was still in his robe: he should have been eating a croissant and pouring well-judged scorn on the literary section of the New York Times at this stage of the morning. He lifted the lid to inspect the frog again. It could be Josh’s idea of a prank – he could be hanging about under the window, seeing if Vasquez could get them going – but would Vas break a shift for that? Did the frog look a little like Josh? It was hard to say…

‘Is that the truth?’ Even though the question wasn’t directed at him Goodnight heard the edge in Billy’s voice: front-on, that tone never failed to make any listener immediately dredge up their worst secrets and lay them out for inspection.

‘Yes.’ Vasquez still sounded irritated, a sure sign he was being honest. ‘Josh just – just sat there on the stool croaking, and then he hopped away, you should see how far he can go in one jump, and while I was chasing him she must have left, so I couldn’t beg her to change him back.’

‘You had to chase him?’ Billy wrinkled his nose. ‘How can you be sure this is him? It could be some random ordinary frog you caught instead - the real Faraday could still be outside somewhere, catching flies with his tongue.’

Horror flickered across Vasquez’ face, followed by scorn. ‘Of course it’s him. How many other frogs do you think there were in the shop at the time?’

Billy shrugged and Goodnight stepped in before it could get worse. ‘Why have you brought him to us?’

Vasquez fixed him with an intense dark gaze, and even though he knew what was happening Goodnight felt himself start to smoulder inside. ‘So you can fix him.’

‘Cure him?’ Goodnight poked a dubious finger towards FrogJosh. ‘Of what? I’m no expert, but he seems in good health to me. Large, bright-eyed, moist: fine specimen of a frog, probably set the other frogs swooning, or whatever it is they do.’

‘Cure-him-of-being-a-frog,’ said Vasquez between gritted teeth.

Goodnight shook his head. ‘Being a frog’s a state, not a disease. I can only set things right that have gone wrong.’

🛠What tools/programs/apps do you use to write?

This question made me laugh. A ballpoint pen and a sheet of A4 paper! I put the story/chapter into Word after a certain point, but all my editing is done on a printed draft, pen in hand. Writing apps are a mystery to me - they seem to encourage you to do anything but actually write.

💖 What made you start writing?

It was really sudden! I’d never written any fiction, but in 2016 I got ill and became completely dislocated from all my previous interests. I went to the cinema to see The Magnificent Seven (2016) and got caught up in the fictional world in a big way, and I started writing really as a means of inhabiting that fictional world instead of the real world, which was so dire to me at that time. And I discovered so much, about writing and fandom, that I’ve been absorbed by it ever since.

🤗 What advice would you give to new fanfic writers that are just getting started?

Essentially, just go for it. It's fanfic, so nothing is at stake. Don't worry about writing 'rules', just tell the story your heart wants.

And also, be a member of your community. It's not just about you writing and everyone else queuing up to admire it; it's about sharing your enthusiasm with others. So read other people's fics, comment on them, share their art, get involved in challenges. Be the fan you want others to be.

🎉 What leads you to consider a fic a success?

If I enjoyed writing it and I enjoy reading it once it's done. I used to stress about external validation, but the experience of doing Yuletide helped with that - Yuletide fics are by definition for minuscule fandoms, meaning that there may only be one or two people who want to read the fic, but creating a story as a gift for someone with whom you share a practically unknown fandom is a delight. So while it's wonderful to get enthusiastic comments and lots of hits, I'm not disappointed when a series like Paradise Alley doesn't get much traction, because I'm so proud of the stories and I love re-reading them so much myself

[neganmct]

Nice ol' vent and no I don't expect you to read it or leave a message; no pressure. Or drink your tea but I'll probably piss in it.

I've had a lot of fucking stuff happen lately and its randomly built the fuck up as time has gone on. I'm probably gonna start enabling voice so I'm not smashing the shit out of my keyboard. That's embarrassing.

So I've a pretty ugly past and I'm trying my best to do good. I used to scare people pretty badly and I'm trying very hard to be more welcoming and more friendly but I'm still struggling to do that because of reasons. It's kinda throwing on at the minute, ya' know? Being told I'm scary.

I recently fell out with a friend who I had a soft spot for. Nothing massive, nothing huge and we spoke quite a bit. I found out through a few others they had been sharing stuff and saying things. It hurt and they had a few screenshots to prove it. It sucked. I had to fight down the urge about calling them. They also went too far with my friend's name. I didn't realise till after that making fun of her name was sorta racist. I was being soft. I had a dream about them too; it was an oddly comforting dream and in my half awake daze I tried to message them before remembering. "Oh yeah, they did this". Miss them, it's dumb but I do.

I've had eating problems for a long time now and I've come close over the past few weeks to just not eating because I need some sort of control and I don't know why. I'm so used to doing the dark shit that I partly want to drop back into the hole I'm trying to dig my way out of.

I was encouraged by some health professionals to interact with my interests, look at the communities. It was actually great at first. I have made some new friends. One friend is an amazing artist, I love it when he draws. He's drawn me before, he's drawn a very special friend of mine, he's done drawing requests. He's just lovely, he's a little brother figure. I made some other friends too shortly after I learned some hype about Stranger Things.

I've not watched all of Stranger Things! I've only watched Season Four because I relate to a character. Obviously Eddie Munson. I was that alt kid in school. I was a scene kid briefly. That was a weird couple of years. Mostly I was just a metal head, still am a metal head. I got beat up, I got stalked, I got harassed, I got threatened. I got falsely accused of things because I was different. I had a character to heavily relate to.

A nerd with the hair. I like how much his appearance reminds me of Eddie Van Halen. That is just lovely. However interacting with a good chunk of the people who also like him is not that great. But now with some of the online stuff I feel like I'm back in school. I was having a really shit day and I was going along with the crowd because I was actually laughing. Imagine my shock to learn I had been snubbed while others had not. They were pissing on me without the courtesy of even calling it rain. No one said a damn thing. I had to find out through someone else who wasn't even involved.

Interacting with a community hasn't really done shit for me right now.

I don't know what I want to do at this point. I feel like I'm stuck. I had projects I was so excited to do and things to see and now I just don't know. The hype I had building and building just abruptly vanished within a few weeks. Now I'm just frustrated, angry.

Life is never going to be completely perfect I know but I feel like I've been spat on and the "I'm sorry" was Bart Simpson saying "I'm soggy".

You know I had something weird happen to me earlier. I was just looking through some content. I've always done out of pure boredom was search, type, watch etc. I was watching a few clips of Eddie Van Halen interact with his child back in the early nineties and I was just. "Aw, that's cute" and I started imagining myself with a family. I hate children. I really fucking hate them so this was extremely out of character for me.

I kept scrolling until eventually I wasn't. I was just sat there and I don't know how much time had past but I was somewhere else. I was day dreaming so fucking intently I could smell, touch and hear as if it were real. I was talking to someone as if they were real. I was walking somewhere and just had a strange sense of freedom I hadn't felt since I was running from a teacher after I was caught with a pack of fags in school. It was amazing. I was broken out of the day dreaming by one of my dogs barking.

I don't know what to do from here. I don't know if I want to continue trying to be a decent person because apparently no matter how hard you try that doesn't happen. Someone is always gonna be scared of me and some people are always gonna have some sort of conflict with me. Its life but it shouldn't be so harsh. I'm scared of people.

If anyone needs me I'll be pretending I'm somewhere else until I can come up with some sort of decision.