#and i can see past the effect of someone’s actions to their true intentions

[totebagbisexual]

my toxic trait is if ur mad at me i’ll do my best to be understanding and recognize where i was wrong and apologize but if ur still mad at me after that i will go fucking crazy

[beegomess]

T.R. || Loving you forever

Summary: Tom and you made a pact that they would be together forever, and you are willing to do so. Even if you have to trick some people into having him in your arms again.

Warnings: The story will take place in the 5thº year.

You, a brilliant student of Slytherin, carry with you an emotional weight and a story that few can understand. The connection you shared with Tom Riddle transcends mere friendship or romance; it was a union of souls who promised a future together, challenging not only conventions, but also the timelines themselves.

The promise made with Tom was more than words; it was a sealed pact with a love so intense that it seemed immortal. When the spell cast by him projected you forward in time, it was not just an escape, but a way to preserve this connection beyond death and forgetfulness. Every day at Hogwarts, while you keep your Slytherin student facade, it is a silent battle to hide the true weight of your heart — the pain of being separated from the one you love most and the persistent hope of meeting him again.

Current life, with its challenges and interactions, is constantly filtered through the memory of the past. Every step you take is calculated, each action is measured with the intention not only to fulfill your mission, but also to keep alive the memory of the love that once defined your existence. The fact that Tom's diary is the key to his resurrection makes his quest a mixture of duty and desire, an effort to restore what has been lost and, at the same time, a longing for a future where you can be together again.

As you approach Harry Potter, you are not only in search of a magical object; you are struggling to unite two worlds - the present and the past, love and obligation, the real and the imagined. Every moment you spend trying to gain Potter's trust is a step closer to realizing a promise that was made in simpler times, and also an attempt to reconcile what was left behind with what can still be achieved.

Behind his calm smile and the calculated strategies, there is a soul marked by an eternity of longing and a heart that still pulsates for the love that has never been faded. The mission is your redemption and your purpose, and its success is the key to restoring a piece of a past that you have never been able to leave completely behind.

His "frendity" began in a Herbology class. You were still someone unknown to him, which certainly helped you.

Harry began to sympathize with you some time ago, seeing you as an unexpected ally. It didn't take long for an obstacle to emerge in his path. Hermione Granger began to suspect her true intentions and decided to warn Harry about you.

One afternoon, while you were talking to Harry in the hallway, Hermione approached with a serious expression, which made you say goodbye and move away discreetly.

- Harry, are you sure you can trust her? - Hermione asked, her voice loaded with concern. - She is from Slytherin, and this should be taken into account.

Harry looked at Hermione, with a confused expression.

- I see no reason to suspect her. She has been very helpful. - Harry replied, trying to seem convinced.

Hermione crossed her arms, her eyes fixed on Harry with a determined look.

- Besides, she is also born a sucker, just like you. It wouldn't be a bad idea to have someone from Slytherin around. But don't worry, I know the reputation of the house is not the best. - He paused, as if expecting an argument.

Although it was not true that you were a "born sucker", the lie that you faced prejudice in Slytherin had a convincing effect on Harry. He believed it quickly, making his task easier.

- I just want you to be cautious. - Hermione insisted. - Even if she seems friendly, Slytherins have a reputation and, in my experience, it is always better not to let your guard down.

Despite Hermione's reservations, Harry continued to open up to you, but his interventions added a layer of tension to his plan. Maintaining Harry's confidence while dealing with Hermione's vigilance was a constant game of balance. Their meetings were planned to look spontaneous, always with a welcoming smile and an offer of genuine help. In each interaction, you calibrated your behavior to be useful and reliable, so that Harry did not suspect his true intentions.

[...]

On the night of that same day, the library was wrapped in an almost reverential silence, illuminated by the flickering light of the candles and the soft glow of the magic lamps. The tall bookshelves projected mysterious shadows, creating an environment that combined comminess and mystery. Harry Potter was sitting at a table, immersed in a thick book, but his expression showed distraction.

You approached with a calm and strategic posture, your clear goal. Harry was distracted, and you noticed a subtle glow emanating from his bag, which was partially open on the table. With a trained look, you immediately recognized Tom Riddle's diary, shining slightly under the light of the library.

- Harry! - You started, your soft and friendly voice - It looks like you're having trouble with this material. Do you need help?

Harry looked up at you, his expression mixing relief with a twinge of suspicion. He moved slightly away from the bag, as if unconsciously protecting the valuable object it contained.

- Oh, it's you. - Harry replied, a little surprised. - Actually, I'm having difficulties with it. I would appreciate it if you can take a look.

You smiled and leaned over to examine the book, your hand sliding discreetly in the direction of the bag. The diary was there, clearly visible through the opening. You tried to stay calm while adjusting your position, trying to get closer to the bag without drawing attention.

However, Harry seemed to notice the movement. His eyes fixed on his hand next to the bag and he hardened a little, his lips closing in a thin line.

The silence of the library was interrupted by a slight sound of something falling on the floor. Tom Riddle's diary, which was visibly exposed in Harry's bag, slipped from the opening and fell with a deaf thum on the tiled floor. The sound made Harry lean abruptly to pick up the object, his expression of concern quickly turning into tension.

He bent down and caught the diary quickly, his fingers squeezing the object firmly as he straightened. His eyes were now fixed on the diary, and there was a shadow of nervousness on his face. The tension was palpable, and he made a visible effort to hide the book in his bag carefully, trying to stay calm.

Taking advantage of the moment, you leaned a little further forward, watching the scene with a look of genuine concern.

- It seems that this is very important to you - you said, your voice loaded with a carefully calculated empathy. - What is this book? It seems to be causing a lot of tension.

Harry looked at you with an expression of surprise and discomfort. He hesitated for a moment, clearly struggling to decide how much to reveal. The shadow of distrust still hovered in his eyes, but the sincerity in his tone seemed to have created a gap.

- It's just one... a personal item. - Harry replied, his voice a little hesitant. - It's nothing to worry about.

You gave a slight understanding smile, trying to soften the situation and keep gaining your trust.

- I Understand. Sometimes, we all have things that we prefer to keep to ourselves. - You said, tilting your head in a friendly way. - But if you need someone to talk to or help with anything, I'm here for that.

Harry seemed to relax a little, although there was still a pinch of caution in his eyes. He clearly appreciated the offer of support, but was still struggling to balance trust with distrust.

- Thank you. - Harry said, his tone a little more relaxed, but still careful. - It's good to know that.

You took advantage of the moment to take a step closer, but without invading his personal space.

- No problem, Harry. The truth is that I'm here to help, and I hope we can work together to overcome any difficulty. - You paused, watching him carefully. - If you need anything, especially if the book is causing problems, know that you can talk to me.

Harry gave a slight nod, his gaze still a little cautious, but grateful. The diary, now again hidden in the bag, seemed to be a source of great concern for him, and his answer indicated that he was starting to open up a little more.

As you walked away, a feeling of satisfaction and relief mixed with the awareness that distrust was still present. Every step towards Harry's trust was a victory.

[...]

The next day, Hogwarts was immersed in an atmosphere of expectation. A timid sun filtered through the windows of the Great Hall, casting soft rays of light on the students' tables. The murmuring conversations and the usual clamor were interrupted when an urgent announcement echoed through the corridors.

Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley were summoned to the Flitwick professor's room due to an unexpected situation: the House's Academic Performance Report was severely outdated and there was an alarming discrepancy in the grades of several students. Hermione, known for her perfectionism and dedication, was immediately involved in solving the problem, while Ron, although initially reluctant, was dragged into the task due to his friendship with Hermione and his desire to help her.

The situation was carefully orchestrated by you. A quick manipulation in the academic records and a subtle error in the calculations had been enough to create a distraction that involved Hermione and Ron for several hours. The confusion generated and the need to correct the data urgently caused them to focus intensely on the task, leaving Harry Potter alone and unprotected.

With Hermione and Ron busy, you saw the perfect opportunity to get closer to Harry. The day was clear and calm, and the library was almost deserted. Harry was sitting at one of the tables, studying alone, his concentration interrupted only occasionally by looks of concern.

In the following hours, you adopted a meticulous surveillance strategy, remaining discreet and observant while following Harry Potter's movements. At every moment, you him through the corridors of Hogwarts, keeping a safe distance so as not to raise suspicions. His goal was clear: to wait for the right moment to intervene and ensure that he could follow Harry's footsteps for Tom Riddle's diary.

The library, where you were often nearby, became your observation post. On some occasions, you infiltrated the common areas and spent time in strategic corridors, always with a watchful eye on any sign that could indicate the boy's plans.

It was on a particularly quiet afternoon, while you were leaning discreetly against one of the walls of the corridor near the women's bathroom, that something caught your attention. Harry was alone, his hesitant steps echoing down the deserted corridor. He seemed to follow a voice that no one else could hear, an expression of curiosity and confusion on his face.

The scene aroused your interest immediately. Harry approached the women's bathroom with a fixed look, almost hypnotized, following the inaudible sound. This place, in particular, carried an emotional weight for you. It was the same bathroom where you and Tom Riddle had spent intimate and secret moments during your youth. It was also the entrance to the Secret Chamber, a vital place for his plans.

You hid in the shadows, watching carefully as Harry stood in front of the bathroom door. He hesitated for a moment, looking around as if trying to understand the origin of the voice that called him. His heart beat faster when he saw his interaction with the family environment. The old walls and dusty mirrors looked like silent witnesses of the past, preserving the secrets and history of his love with Tom.

Harry entered the bathroom, and the door closed smoothly behind him. You knew that could be the moment you were waiting for.

With your mind boiling with excitement and a renewed desire to achieve your goal, you waited patiently. The anticipation of finally being able to recover his beloved Tommy and the certainty that the moment was approaching filled his heart with a mixture of hope and anxious expectation.

After a few minutes, you decided to follow Harry. Entering the women's bathroom, nostalgia enveloped him when he remembered the moments shared with Tom there. Each step he took brought her closer to the achievement of his goal. Harry's presence there meant that something important was about to happen, and you were determined to ensure that the plan to bring Tom Riddle back was realized.

You moved forward, your breathing controlled, moving with the grace and caution of a predator. When he entered the bathroom, he saw Harry standing in front of a sink, murmuring words that activated the entrance to the Chamber of Secrets. A smile of satisfaction appeared on his lips. The way was open, and you were ready to follow Harry and recover the diary that meant so much to you and Tom.

Harry looked around one last time, then disappeared through the secret entrance. Without wasting time, you followed him, descending through the depths of the Secret Chamber, each step bringing you closer to your final goal.

Nothing could stop you from bringing your boyfriend back, not even the famous Harry Potter. After all, you had promised Tom eternity together, and you were willing to do anything to fulfill that promise.

With the entrance to the Chamber of Secrets open, you followed Harry carefully, keeping yourself in the shadows so as not to be detected. The narrow passage widened as they advanced, revealing a path of stones flanked by statues of imposing snakes. The air was humid and cold, and the smell of mold impregnated the environment.

The tension increased with each step. The statues of snakes, with their eyes fixed and mouths open, seemed to watch you as you advanced. The dim light reflected on the damp stones, creating a gloomy and mysterious environment. In the background, an immense sculpture of Salazar Slytherin's face dominated the space, his stern gaze seeming to judge anyone who dared to enter that sacred place.

You stayed in the shadows, watching as Harry approached the center of the chamber. His heart beat faster when he saw Gina Weasley lying on the floor, apparently unconscious. Harry ran to her, kneeling next to her and trying to wake her up with evident despair.

- Gina! Wake up, please! Gina!

You saw the frustration and fear in Harry's eyes as he insisted that Gina wake up. He shook her slightly, trying to resuscitate her. But before he could make any progress, a familiar voice echoed through the walls of the chamber, making his heart jump.

- She's not going to wake up.

You recognized the voice instantly. It was Tom Riddle, or rather, a projection of his youth. He emerged from the shadows, his imposing presence and cold look fixed on Harry. Time seemed to stop as you watched the scene unfold, the presence of Tom filling the camera with a sense of power and authority.

Harry stared at Tom with a mixture of confusion and determination.

- Tom... Tom Riddle. - Harry stuttered. - What do you mean she won't wake up? Is she...?

- She's still alive, but by a thread. - Your acquaintance and beloved Tom Riddle was finally there.

Tom's footsteps approached Harry, who stared at him with a certain fear.

- Are you a ghost?

- A memory preserved in a diary for 50 years. - Slytherin corrected it.

Tom noticed Harry's wand fallen and picked it up. Harry still seemed worried about Gina, a little distracted to realize.

- She looks cold. Tom, and the basilisk? - Harry looked up and noticed his wand in Tom's hands. - Return my wand, Tom. - The boy used an authoritarian voice.

- Why? You won't need it. - Riddle replied simply.

- Look, we have to go. We need to save her. - Potter insisted.

- I don't think I can do that, Harry. - He paused. - While Gina gets weaker, I get stronger.

It was at that moment that you decided to get out of the shadows. Harry, surprised to see you there, tried to position himself to protect her.

- Y/N, get out of here! He's dangerous! - Harry shouted, the concern evident in his voice.

But you just smiled and took a few steps towards Tom, ignoring Harry's warning. Her eyes fixed on the familiar and beloved face, Tom's expression softening slightly when recognizing her.

- Y/N? - Tom murmured, a mixture of surprise and recognition in his voice.

You nodded, the emotion evident in your eyes.

- Tom... Finally. - you said, the voice choked. - I spent 50 years looking for you, waiting for this moment.

Harry watched the scene, just shocked and confused.

- Y/N, what are you doing? He's trying to hurt Gina!

Tom reached out, and you took it without hesitation, feeling the familiar warmth of your touch.

- Y/N... my dear. - Tom said softly, his eyes fixed on yours. - I missed you so much. Every second away from you was an eternity.

- You have no idea how long I waited for this. - You answered, the emotion overflowing as I hugged you.

Harry, still processing the revelation, was trying to find a way to save Gina and prevent Tom's plans. But Tom's presence by your side and his growing power made it clear that you would not let anything or anyone interfere in your reunion.

Tom held his hand firmly, his dark eyes full of determination. Harry, still trying to understand what was happening, took a step forward, desperate to save Gina and understand the situation.

- Y/N, that's crazy! He's dangerous! - Harry begged.

You looked at Harry, without showing regret, just firmness. Tom, with Harry's wand in hand, turned to you, a cold smile on his lips as if admiring her.

Harry, confused and distressed, continued to look at you and Tom, paralyzed next to Gina's unconscious body. His expression was a mixture of shock and despair.

- Why, Y/N? How can you do that? - Harry managed to murmur, his voice full of frustration.

Tom gave an enigmatic smile.

- Harry, you can't understand. Y/N and I share a past that transcends any notion you may have. We were colleagues at Hogwarts, and our love was something deep and immortal. We made a promise of eternity that nothing and no one can undo.

Harry looked at Tom in disbelief.

- But... how did she not appear in the memories I saw? - Harry questioned, still trying to understand.

This time you answered coldly.

- Tom showed you only what he wanted you to see. There are many things you don't know, many hidden truths. I've always been by your side, even when you couldn't see it. - You pause, but then it continues. - Thank you for making things easier, Harry.

Tom began to resume his complete physical state, his presence solidifying as he again became an imposing and real figure. Harry, paralyzed next to Gina, watched feeling the failure on his shoulders.

_______________________________

masterlist

xoxo, bee 🫶🏼✨

[bleue-flora]

as much as I like the dsmp story and its message about how there’s a deep down, I can’t help but think about the Bojack horsemen quote about how there’s no deep down and you are the actions you do regardless of someone’s intent or backstory

[context]

I believe you are referring to this quote “That’s the thing. I don’t think I believe in deep down. I kind of think all you are is just the things that you do.” (Which btw yall its real annoying when I have to find whatever the hell you are talking about, no shade just as an aside…<3)

The thing is, both things can be true. Life is about choices, and your every action and inaction has a consequence, (which I think I’ve talked about before but I don’t feel like finding it at the moment). In other words, everything you do impacts the world around you and has lasting effects. You may not know it and are likely very unaware of the consequences (positive and negative). This is because like my post said we are all inherently selfish because we live and see the world from only one view - our own. So yes, you are the actions/“things you do” and choices you make, regardless of the intentions.

At the end of the day, whether you meant to or not, whether you had good intentions or not, if you hurt someone the facts remain the same - you hurt someone. They have a fundemental right to feel hurt and that is always valid, emotions and feelings are always valid, whether it’s logical or makes sense or not. The reason deep down doesn’t change the outcome or the hurt you caused. However, that is about the past action. If you want to learn and grow and form meaningful relationships, avoid conflict… etc. That’s where the deep down comes in. Then it’s important to look at the reasons, not as excuses or justifications but as explanations - a bridge to understanding and shattering our stereotypes, assumptions and judgement.

(Okay, my foot still hurts from you stepping on it, but yeah if it was just an accident then the relationship doesn’t have to just all end over something stupid like it would if I assumed it was intentional.) Yes the impact you make on the world is the sum of what you do and that impact is true regardless if there is a deeper reason behind it. But also, if you only focus on what people do and go no deeper, then you are missing the bigger picture and your relationships will not last long and you are going to live a very lonely and conflictfilled life.

That is why it is important. Not because in the finale of the dsmp Dream’s reveal changes any of his actions, but because it changes our perspective of him and that changes how we act next. Whether we show compassion and empathy or understanding or forgiveness of someone’s actions or run the hell away. (Whether a conflict breaks out over you stomping on my foot so I step on yours back.)

As an engineer, a nerdy metaphor I could use is that it’s kinda like if situations were an equation then the effect and action is the answer (the one side of the =), but sometimes we need to used the other side of the = to solve for x, so we can solve the next equations.

The deep down matters because it should change your action. It matters because in recent years after excusing my behavior because of something or the other, I realized ya know other people might also have a valid reason too. So while my automatic assumption of why they are late to class is that they are lazy, or rude, or don’t care, maybe maybe they actually woke up nauseous and were throwing up which prevented them from being on time, maybe they fainted coming out of the shower, maybe their car wouldn’t start, maybe they had a doctor’s appointment beforehand, maybe there was a car accident making them late, maybe there was a train blocking the road…etc. there are so many reasons, but our mind just jumps to the worst, and we expect grace from others when we are late but wouldn’t give others the same benefit of the doubt. If we had, if instead of judgment and criticism, we checked on them after class to see if they are okay then maybe we learn of their struggle, and maybe they need our help, or maybe we relate and become friends, maybe you share your notes with them, maybe you give them a hug. The deeper meaning changes what you do and like the quote says, what you do is the impact on the world…

[catgirl-catboy]

Mastermind Whit Essay

Okay, I'm really unsure of how to begin this post. I know most people in the DRDT fandom suspect Teruko as the mastermind due to her secret, but are we perhaps playing right into the masterminds hands?

I feel like if Teruko was genuinely the mastermind, she wouldn't give David of all people a note confirming she is. Due to how misleading the secrets have been with other people, it makes far more sense to read this as a frame by the true mastermind.

Maybe Teruko would deliberately make herself suspicious if it were chapter 5 or 6, but in chapter 2??? I'm not buying it.

I feel like this red herring of Teruko is hiding another, far more suspicious character.

Before we get into our theory, the mastermind should match up with the killing game's mascot.

Monokuma and Junko are the obvious pair, since Junko herself chooses to look like Monokuma. There are also hints in Monokuma theater about her true identity.

Monomi and Izuru also have some parallels, especially since Usami's transformation into Monomi could be considered a nod to Hajime's transformation into Izuru.

Monokubs are cheap ripoffs of Monokuma. Tsumugi is a cheap ripoff of Junko.

This trend also tends to apply to fangans, but I'd rather not spoil any for you.

So what does Monotv say about our mysterious mastermind? Monotv's personality tends to focus on one thing: ratings. He will also fake ineptitude on occasion to make things more interesting.

What if I told you that there was a DRDT character whose every action happens to increase ratings?

That's right, ladies and gentlemen (and Nico!), I'm talking about Whit.

Whit is one of the few characters we see before we get an introduction for him. And what do we see him doing? Turning Hu against the group.

Hu is one of the few characters that isn't willing to trust the group with her secret in chapter 2, and this could very well be because of the bad first impression Whit helped make. This has a side effect of having her emotionally dependent on David by trial 2, which I'm positive will have bad results when the hiatus ends.

When we get to his introduction proper, he spends most of it trying to force Teruko and Xander closer together. This isn't his only notable interaction with Teruko either, since he's the only one that prods her to talk about her past pre-trial 1.

It's hard to say for certain about Whit's intentions, but most of his actions appear to have negative concequences later on in the game.

When it comes to Whit, he claims most of his actions are guided by his intuition, like Sayaka before him.

But when you look at things from an objective point of view, his intuition might not hold up. This is the person that hid David's secret from the class for as long as practical.

Why?

In-universe, Whit claims its to help David's career.

But if you look at it closely, does this claim make any sense? This killing game is televised, so it'd be reasonable to suspect that the in-universe DRDT audience knows all the secrets before the characters do.

Besides, how good can Whit's intuition be if he believed in the good of someone as suspicious as David.

So, if Whit's stated motive for keeping that secret doesn't hold up (to me.), what would? Why, MonoTV's motive! Everything Whit does intentionally or unintentionally ups ratings.

Teruko distrusting and being isolated from the group? Is good for ratings.

(Whit didn't bring her back into the group like he did with Charles, which reads as OOC behavior to me. But do you know who canonically doesn't want Teruko talking with the group? MonoTV.)

Hu and David getting close and having a falling out? Is good for ratings.

You could even argue his relationship with Charles is good for ratings.

Speaking of David, I find it interesting that Whit used the same tactic as David to avoid sharing his secret, but did it better.

Unlike David, Whit dropped multiple possible secrets, and admitted the possibility that it could be none of them upfront. This makes him dodge the suspicion David got when his stated secret wasn't on the list.

Whit's secret wasn't even given much attention in the trial itself.

I also feel like Whit's secret was worded a lot more plainly than most of the other secrets. Compare "your mother is dead, you always omit that truth" to "Your older brother died, but you don't remember him at all." or "Your younger sister killed herself because of you. You should have never left."

It could just be because the secret isn't plot-relevant this chapter, or it could be because Whit's secret isn't what it seems.

Another thing, Whit is pretty strange around corpses. He made a dark joke about Min's execution, and under reacts to every corpse in the game so far. Many people think this has something to do with his mom, but I have one question for those people. Would that really explain why he's worse than Veronika, who canonically enjoys the game?

This concludes the main part of my analysis, but here are some details that could be questionable with Mastermind!Whit in mind. (Or maybe I just think everything he does is suspicious, who knows!)

In chapter 1, he deliberately threw the arm wrestling contest to Teruko. Could be hiding his true strength?

He chooses NOT to break up fights that were going nowhere. This seems contrary to what an ideal matchmaker should do in this context.

His name. Whit is one letter away from Wit, meaning intelligence. That could be an example of some very clever foreshadowing. But... its a reach.

He was one of the 3 to get redesigns, along with the protagonist. However, he got specific attention done to his eyes. Every Mastermind in canon does something cool to their eyes upon the reveal.

Out of all of the canon Danganronpa characters, Whits talent is the closest to Toko's. Charwit could be an inversion of Togafuwa, with feelings being one-sided on Toko's (Whit's) end this time.

[blackjackkent]

Final chat before Emperor Shenanigans. (I have some GW2 stuff to do this evening, so Empy stuff will have to wait until Tuesday, I think. There was more miscellaneous chatter to clear out than I remembered. XD )

"Shadowheart has found a little bit of herself again. Selune cannot take all of the credit - she may have lit he way, but it is the cleric who took the step."

Rakha has found that she likes talking to Jaheira. In a way it is for the same reason that she likes talking to Minthara - both women are older with much lived experience, and they articulate themselves calmly and clearly and with a very strong vision of themselves, their morals, their actions - which are things Rakha still does not really have.

Jaheira is also more like Wyll than Minthara is - she is kinder, gentler. And yet, in the heat of battle, she is fiercer than almost any of them; she becomes an animal in the most literal sense, with teeth and claws flashing into her target.

In this sense, she is perhaps, even more than Minthara, a representation of the person Rakha would like to be.

"Now that we're traveling together," she says gruffly, a sort of subtle prompting, "I realize I don't know much about you."

Jaheira laughs ruefully. "That speaks well of your taste," she quips. "I've heard my share of bad ballads about things I never did." A pause. She shrugs. "If you have questions, ask. Just don't expect my answers to rhyme."

(A/N: In keeping with past moments where Rakha has been deliberately willing to be perfectly open about her lack of memory and her bloodlust, I think she must have had a conversation with Jaheira about both things at some point on the road. Really, I suspect Isobel and Aylin must have gotten the full story too at some point - if for no other reason than that at SOME point they would notice that Rakha gets tied up in a corner every night, and Wyll would have sheepishly needed to explain that it wasn't for frisky reasons.

I'm told by @thedarkstrategist that you actually can tell Isobel about things if you bring it up all the way back at Last Light, and that she takes it more or less in stride - pointing out that you wouldn't have brought it up if you actually wanted to follow through on the urges.

I tend to assume Jaheira would be similarly matter-of-fact about it, with some wise comment to the effect that what Rakha does and actually wants is far more important than what the beast tries to make her do. And I wonder if she has started to have certain suspicions even if she articulates nothing aloud - but even if she does, she would think they're mad suppositions rather than fact.

Bhaal is dead, after all, and Amelyssan died along with all his remaining essence. She saw it happen herself...)

As usual, Rakha is always pleased when someone gives her an active invitation to ask questions and receive answers.

"Is it true you've fought the Dead Three before?" she asks.

Jaheira snorts. "It was Bhaal alone we faced in our time. And bad as that was, he had no elder brain for a lapdog then." She shakes her head slightly. "Help won't come from the history books, or from any old tales I can spin you. This is your story to write."

A pause. Then her eyes narrow with a flash of amusement. "There - have I fulfilled my role as your wise and wizened elder?"

Rakha cocks her head to one side, trying to gauge the thought behind these words. "You seem reluctant to discuss the past," she says slowly.

Jaheira quirks up an eyebrow. "What need, when it seems so intent on repeating itself," she says dryly. "But stay this apocalypse, and I'll let you read my journals - promise."

Rakha wasn't deeply interested in her journals. She just wants to hear how Jaheira sees the situation, what she is thinking. "You mentioned you know something of illithids."

For a moment, the sardonic humor fades from Jaheira's eyes and her face twists with the flash of some ugly memory. "More than I would like," she mutters. "In my youth, I was a brief - and very much unwilling - member of a colony's hivemind. I felt the way they think. Saw the world as they do. Foul, unnatural creatures who find the foulness in us and twist it to their will."

A pause, a blink - and then the smirk is back, casual and calm again. "But then - who am I speaking to?" she says dryly, squinting at Rakha. "You have far more experience than I."

She means the tadpole, of course. Involuntarily, Rakha rubs her fingertips against her temple where the worm sits - but her jaw sets fiercely. "My mind is still my own," she says curtly. "I plan to keep it that way."

Jaheira tilts her head and looks at Rakha thoughtfully for a few moments before responding. "I believe you," she says quietly. "You remind me of another I knew, marked by forces beyond their control. The gods can grant power or strip it away - but so long as your will remains, you have the only weapon you need."

Privately Rakha wonders how long her will can hold on, given the battering it gets between the beast and the worm. But... the expression of confidence does more than a little to encourage her.

[nbofvoid]

Sometimes Misunderstandings are the Best

I do not know where this came from, I just started writing and then I had this.

Summary: Dream has been doing this song and dance for a long time. This is a first, though, and not one he's going to complain about. He never gets this much fun, afterall.

-~4k words

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"You have entered here with ill intent, impure thought and action driving your course," Dream recites, sword singing in his ears as he draws it. "You have ignored the chances to correct your course. Ignored the warnings to turn back. Ignored all the signs for you to become more than you are now. Consider this your last chance and the final one where you will face the culmination of all your choices that lead you here. The things and people that told you to come. Turn. Leave. Or you will have to battle me to gain the hand of the princess you seek."

The last words make him want to throw up, but they are needed. Have been since that first person refused to take 'there's not a fucking princess here' as an answer from Sapnap and leading to a couple missing fingers. All of those who have found their way here since have been after the cursed and trapped 'princess' and all of them are tired. Even though it feels like it drags Dream down more to have a new script he has to remember on top of the old one.

The armored knight shifts and Dream continues with the script before it can get any kind of word in. They're all the same. At least he hasn't had to watch the full effects in the same length of time.

"You have made your choice by staying here. A foolish one you will not see the other side of," he intones, wondering if he really should have just let George to take care of this. "You may have a blade, however can you use it? Will you be able to stand against another with that simple metal? Or will it break when you need it most? This will test that question, but I already know the answer. There is not a single time that one has managed to get past me and you will not be the first."

"Uh, I-"

Dream's eyes drift to the seam between the wall and ceiling. There's a crack up there one of them is going to have to take care of, but he's not sure they have the supplies on hand. Or if the building will let them mess with it. "If you still refuse to accept the fact that you are not worthy of continuing forward, draw your blade. You will have to face me in battle to continue forward and I warn you now: I am simply the first. The ones after me are stronger, smarter, better. They will know what you are capable of and you will not be able to beat them. I doubt that will be a problem as not once has blood been spilled beyond this room."

You know, he thinks they might have some leftover bricks from that fireplace repair. Maybe those could work? And they weren't rejected so hopefully...

Oh, wait, he should probably turn back to the knight in front of him. He's getting to the part where it attacks finally, Dream maybe decides to dodge it for a couple minutes, lops off its head, goes back upstairs and annoys someone into checking if they actually have bricks and fixing the crack while ignoring the body that turned to dust in front of him.

"Well? You are seeking for your true love," he says, feeling the mockery in his own words curling around his toes. "Fight for it or give up. There is no other choice for you to make at this point. Make it."

A shift and he grips his sword for an attack-

The helmet isn't looking at him. It's angled down as gloved hands dig into a belt pouch and aren't even holding a weapon anymore and this doesn't happen. Why isn't it attacking?

"I think I might be in the wrong place?" it says, staying in clear sight as it pulls out a parchment and still not looking up at him.

Oh.

Dream blinks under his own helmet. This... really hasn't ever happened before. Even before the whole 'princess' thing took off no one really got here accidentally. All of them wanted to kill Dream, after all, and he killed them in turn to avoid watching the worse option.

"I was lookin' for my" something Dream doesn't recognize but sounds kind of similar to Sapnap's first language "and I was told to come here. Or at least somewhere that has a lot of the same features? I'm not really familiar with this place."

Well, Dream is kind of feeling awkward now. A large part of him wants to offer to point them in the right direction, but he literally just made a huge, rambling speech about how he's going to kill them and they're a trespasser and clearly corrupt in one way or another. That isn't how you're supposed to start a friendly interaction with someone. At least according to Bad. Hm. Maybe he can try apologizing? Bad says that's something humans do when they mess up so it should be correct in this situation, right? Dream made a mistake in thinking they were here for the non-existent princess and he can make it up by offering help in finding the correct place.

"Let me see."

The helmet finally looks up again and oh no. Is that overstepping in a different way? The others don't always like when someone tries to help and even Dream gets annoyed when one of them tries to push help when he doesn't want it. He should just clarify that he's-

"Here," the knight says, holding the parchment out. "My friend - I think that's the word - wrote it out for me."

Dream nods slightly, carefully taking the page and trying to not think about how far they must have traveled to get here if they aren't sure about the language. The writing is, weird. Parts really small while others are huge in comparison and somehow spiky and curvy at the same time. He can still read it, but the handwriting is strange enough Dream is seriously wondering if he can maybe ask to keep this for Bad to have.

Though....

"I think this is the right place," he says, trying to pull up the faint memory of arriving in this damned place and the outside world. Why did he offer to point them the right way? He hasn't been outside since he was a child.

"Really? Cause I want to find" that same word from earlier "before" a different one "gets" and they seem to just be slipping into their native tongue now. At least he can tell their voice sounds almost excited and Dream really wants to know what the fuck they're talking about if they aren't here for the 'Princess' or would be able to translate into trade. Actually, Sapnap's here right now so he should be able to ask for his help with this, right?

"I said 'I think'. It's been awhile since I've seen the outside, but I think I know someone who might speak the same language you're using," he offers. "Would that work to double check with him?"

The knight nods, "Yeah. I can stay here if you don't want anyone following you around?"

Dream stares. All of this has been weird since the script got tossed out earlier, yet the offer to just, stay in the entry hall to not overstep the tenuous 'welcome' is just as off putting as the knight not attacking. It's actually enough he pauses to think about if he's actually alright with a stranger entering the rest of the building.

"Are you okay just standing here?" he finally settles on. "It can't be that interesting, but..."

How can he nicely put 'The rest of this building is the safe place for all of us and none of us like the idea of outsiders being let in past the entry hall' without sounding like a bigger ass then he has been?

"As long as you don't mind me poking around here," the knight states, attention already off of Dream and staring at the murals along the walls.

He glances over, but they aren't that interesting and he doesn't get why the knight is apparently intrigued, but it means he can track down Sapnap in the time it takes them to get bored of the boring things.

"Okay, I'll be" wow, they don't wait even a second before jogging to the nearest one "right back."

Dream stares at them for a second before slowly backing up to the concealed pathway deeper into the building. They don't even react as the redstone activates to let him through or as it closes.

"What the fuck," he whispers, staring at the dark stone and wondering if he's actually gone insane for a moment.

He shakes it off, bolting as fast as possible into the maze of the building and yelling at the top of his lungs for Sapnap. There's an explosion from somewhere followed by a 'You muffin!' almost drowning out a thump from a room he passes. (George's bedroom, so not where Sapnap would be. And it's his own fault for sleeping while the rest of them are awake.) Luckily, it doesn't take long to come across Sapnap poking his head out of a doorway spilling heat haze into the hallway and Dream skids to a stop to avoid sudden onset heatstroke.

"Why are yelling?" Sapnap asks over the clanging of his rods.

Dream takes a breath, "I need your help with something in the entry."

Sapnap's face scrunches up, "Didn't you say that you wanted to deal with the next ones that showed up? Get some kind of fun out of beating up people who deserve it? Or" he gets a shit-eating grin "is it someone from your home?"

"None of that," he sighs, rolling his eyes under the helmet and kind of wishes he could take it off to deal with this. "I need you to translate."

That has Sapnap pausing, silent except for the rhythmic clanking of his rods. "Yeah, okay. Sounds interesting."

"Great. C'mon. I left them alone and they said it was okay, but that room is soooo boring to be stuck in and I don't want them to wait forever," he says, grabbing hold of Sapnap's wrist and tugging him out of the room.

There's a yelp and a faint struggle as Sapnap barely manages to kick the door shut, "Dream! Are you trying to burn the place down? You know that won't work!"

Dream ignores the complaining as he keeps dragging the other back through the halls. He has no idea how long the knight has been left there with how this place is structured and he really doesn't want to leave them for long enough to get bored or, you know, die, so he keeps pressing against the button to open the door even though it doesn't make it open any faster. Sapnap tugs his hand away from the button after the 20th press and he just starts tapping his foot against the carpeted floor.

"Dude. You can calm down," Sapnap sighs, throwing arms over Dream's armored shoulders and letting his full weight press down. "It hasn't been that long. There's no way Slowness has even had the chance to activate."

He shoves an elbow into Sapnap's ribs because technically yes, but in reality no. It's maybe something he should talk to them about, but he really, really does not want to talk about Before and they know that but this is really something they should-

The door clanks open enough to get through and he dashes through, lungs burning as his eyes snap around for the knight-

Who is still at the first mural, staring up at it and where they really that interested in the fucking murals depicting Dream's imprisonment? Really?

The knight's head turns to look over, straightening at seeing them standing on the dais and - oddly - Dream doesn't feel the weight of their focus on himself even though they're looking at them both so who could they-

Blaze rods clanking in a harsh smack reminds him that Sapnap's here too and he watches as the other drifts barely above the ground as he goes down the stairs calling what he knows is a greeting. With that, a whole conversation starts up in the rumbling, burning language Dream's never been able to get a hang of no matter how hard he's tried. It kind of sucks not knowing what either of them are saying, but he trusts Sapnap will give him answers and as long as he's in the room, none of the effects should have the chance to start up.

His eyes flick up to the mural the knight was so intent on, but he really can't see any reason for someone to be interested in it. It's nothing but the remainder of people who were terrified about nothing and decided the best way to deal with that was to toss him away without a second glance. It's pure luck that none of the others have decided to ask about them.

Sapnap bursts into laughter, dragging his attention back. The blaze hybrid has his feet fully on the ground, bent over to brace against his knees as he laughs and laughs and laughs. The knight looks up at him, head tilted and Dream can feel the bone deep confusion that rings in his own body. At least it seems to be a misunderstanding? Maybe? At least something Sapnap finds absolutely hilarious.

"Oh sweet Nether," Sapnap finally gasps out. "This is great."

"Wonderful," Dream says, crossing his arms. "Are you willing to share, now?"

Sapnap gasps in air, the rods and his skin flaring in brightness with each breathe, "I'll tell you, just gimme a moment."

He rolls his eyes, hearing Bad's near silent footfalls as he steps through the door, "Fine."

"What's going on?" Bad mutters, bent over to speak right next to Dream's ear. "Are they going to join us?"

"I don't think so," Dream whispers back, watching as Sapnap's coloration slowly steadies. "I just needed Sapnap's help figuring out what exactly they're here for and then he fell over laughing."

"Huh."

"Okay, okay, okay!" Sapnap is still laughing as he comes over. "So, they're here to fight you."

Dream blinks, "They said they weren't here for a princess? Was that just a miscommunication?"

"No. It's more like an arena match," Sapnap explains. "Or sparring with us. They aren't here for a princess or to kill an evil beast or any of the other things people have sought this place out for, they are literally just looking for a decent spar for a best of five. And they were sent here with a vague as shit description."

He looks over at the (maybe not a) knight who's head has turned back to the murals. The armor has the appearance of something that's actually used and the sword he can tell even from this distance has been cared for and, well, he has been calling them a 'knight' from the very first glance.

"I'll fight them," he says, stepping around Sapnap to go down the three steps.

Sapnap calls something out to the visitor who obviously perks up, moving to the spot they'd first stopped in when Dream had started talking. Dream stops a length away from them. Not close enough for either to actually hit with their blades and he actually feels excited to be facing a battle. It might not be much - even the others have to go three to one for him to really start having to think in a spar - but this is different and he can't wait to experience it.

"Don't hold back," the visitor says, sword dangling from their hand as Sapnap gives a count down.

"We'll see," he replies, wondering how much he might be able to draw out the coming battles. Sapnap said best of five, after all.

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Every single inch of him aches and Dream can't help the stupid grin he knows is splitting his face even if it would reduce the strain in his muscles even slightly.

"Can you stop with the ridiculous smile," George pleads, dropping a warm towel over his head. "It's getting disturbing."

"Let him have it," Bad chuckles. "It's not like there's a whole lot that gets him this happy, anyway."

Dream hums in agreement, wincing faintly at the strain it puts across his chest and limbs. He can't move and Bad had to help get the armor off, move him into the back of the building, and get him onto one of the couches to rest his muscles from the strain Dream'd put them under. Not a situation he likes, but he can't bring himself to care right now.

"So I should have actually left my room to figure out what was going on," George sighs. "What happened?"

"Hilarity!" Sapnap crows, the door slamming into the wall as he rushes in. "I really, really need to tell you guys just how hilarious this is. It's great!"

The towel over his face is pulled away and Dream can actually see the other three now. George lounging in one of the chairs, Sapnap floating in excitement by the door as his rods rotate faster than normal, and Bad sitting next to him folding the towel into a rectangle he places over Dream's forehead.

"It was someone just looking for a spar," Bad offers. "Odd and certainly different from the usual, but I'm not sure why Sapnap's finding it so funny."

Sapnap gasps in mock offense, grasping at his chest, "How could you! It is absolutely hilarious and watching Dream get his ass handed to him was even more so."

Dream snorts, "Thanks."

"You're welcome," Sapnap chirps. "But seriously, it is way funnier and I should probably explain why."

"You should," George says. "Though imagining Dream loosing in a spar is funny enough."

The rods clack as he continues, "So, I mentioned that they were looking for a best of five spar thing which isn't the best explanation but it's the one I could use. Basically, a lot of the races in the Nether have this coming of age task where they prove they're strong enough to be considered an adult. Most of the time, it things like go kill a ghast or help take out a threat to the clan, but sometimes, they'll be sent out to find specific fights for various reasons."

Dream carefully turns his head to the side, eyeing Sapnap as he grabs hold of his rods to keep them from running into the couch as he sits and continues, "Rarely, something happens and they have to use something to actually find the task. I don't know all of the details cause each of them is different, but they implied that their's was a vision of some sort. Meaning, they were literally sent here by divine intervention to fight Dream. Purely to prove they're skilled enough to be an adult."

He crosses his eyes, staring at the wall, "I guess it is kind of funny, but I think you still have a lot more cultural input that makes it more so."

"Probably," he sighs. "But thinking of a god just looking at all the possibilities for them to fight and choosing to send them to Dream is-" he waves a hand around in the air, trailing off with a large grin.

"Knowing how much of a pain it is to get here, that is kind of amusing," Bad adds. "Were they another blaze? I didn't see any rods, but they could have been holding them inside the armor?"

Sapnap shakes his head, "Nah, something else which is why they had the armor. Blazes don't really do that proving thing. Mom had a handful come to challenge her while I was growing up, though."

Dream closes his eyes as they start going into questions about what the differences between the various Nether races is when it comes to coming of age. Given most of them are just 'No clue, but this is what I remember/saw', he doesn't feel bad about tuning the conversation out. It doesn't really matter to him why the visitor decided to make the trek to the building. Not when he's still turning the fights over in his head, debating what he could have done differently, what it would be like to have a rematch, how to maybe convince one of them to track down the visitor and give an offer of a place to stay in exchange for another fight.

It's been forever since he had a fight that pushed him like that.

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The helmet clangs against the stone as it drops from Techno's fingers, quickly followed by the gauntlets and vambraces. The enchantment on the rest of the set stings against his skin. Pulses in waves of tingling pain that doesn't actually hurt him, but is uncomfortable enough he wants the thing off.

"Oh my god, could you not wait like another ten feet to start taking off the armor?" Skeppy complains. "You almost hit me."

"Sounds like a you problem," he grunts back, twisting around to reach the buckles on the pauldrons and breastplate.

"Just because I'm shorter than you-"

Techno's ear pricks up, turning to the flowing magma river in time to see crackling skin breaching the surface and soul fire eyes stare at him.

Skeppy bumps into one of his greaves, "Why are you- Oh, hi Tommy."

Tommy tilts his head, claws digging into the netherrack as he shoves out of the magma. Globs of the molten rock drip down his skin as he settles on the shore and reaches out to Techno. Techno steps closer, collapsing to the ground and purring as those same claws curve under the armor to pick out the buckles.

"SaaaAAffffe?" Tommy's voice rumbles out.

"Yeah," he replies, eyes drifting closed as the armor comes off piece by piece and taking the tingling of the enchantment with it. "We're both safe."

A crooning rumble vibrates through the air around them with the last of the buckles around his torso coming undone and Tommy switching focus to Techno's hair. The scratches across his scalp increase the volume of his purring as he leans back into the warm scales and skin.

"This is sickeningly sweet," Skeppy says, leaning against Techno's thigh. "Why do you have to put me through this."

Tommy hisses, but doesn't pull away from petting Techno's hair. If anything, he just pulls his trailing tail further out of the magma to curl more around the two of them.

"Succeed?" he croons.

Techno gives a positive hum as Skeppy says, "Yep! Techno really proved himself in battle and I'd say is totally an adult even if he already is and I don't really get why he had to do this in the first place, but that doesn't change that he won. It was a real pain to get there, though. Couldn't you have offered somewhere easier to get to? Most of the travel was just finding the thing and we got there and then the first thing we come across was talking about a mate or something? It was weird and made me think I got the wrong details before it got a blaze to confirm we were in the right place."

He huffs as Tommy sprawls across his back, pressing down on him and stopping with the hair petting. Something that is absolutely criminal and he grumbles and shifts to make that clear. It only gets a grumbling chuff and Tommy pressing further down on him and fine. Techno will take the physical contact for now, he guesses. He has missed being with his full sounder.

Tommy doesn't bother with more words, curling over Techno fully. He's finally comfortably warm after being cold and having to wear that armor set didn't help either even if he knows it was designed to keep him safe. Skeppy is pressed into his side humming faintly under Tommy's rumbling and his own purring. There will be time later to talk about his proving, but for now, Techno lets sleep claim him.

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Details I was thinking about while writing:

Dream is imprisoned in a sort of castle-thing and has been since he was like five in order to prevent some kind of bad thing from happening. Bad, Sapnap, and George live with him, but aren't under the same imprisonment deal so they leave occasionally.

When Dream was alone, he figured out there was a sort of curse on the place as well and anyone who enters the entry hall has the chance of getting some sort of affliction put on them. And time acts weird in the Hall sometimes going faster, sometimes going slower.

Sapnap is a blaze hybrid, Bad is a demon, George is human, Dream is unknown but looks humanoid

This is Techno's first time being in the overworld and he hates it. Mainly because of the armor he had to wear and how cold it was compared to the Nether. He knows that it was the only logical option for his proving trial, though, so he puts up with it.

Tommy is a magma/lava mer and they can speak, they just tend to use calls more than words, but he puts in the effort to make sure Techno has all the resources to grow up properly. Yes, Tommy is older here. He's also a god, but ignore that. He just wants to make sure his little brother knows he's loved.

Skeppy is just like, a 6-9 inch tall golem so he was there for the battle with Dream, it's just none of them besides Techno noticed him. He's also part of the sounder and helped a lot with tracking down the castle-thing due to actually being created on the overworld.

If there's any other tags I should add, let me know!

[butchdykekondraki]

Genuine question irt personality disorders vs things like ADHD, autism, DID, and schizophrenia(might be long so sorry). Anyone with a personality can be categorized into having a "personality disorder" yes, even if those traits are seen as "positive" and "unintrusive" to others. It's just a way to categorize someone's personality type so it's easier to break down and understand the patterns in ones behaviors. I'm AuDHD, and knowing this has helped me tremendously in being able identify my triggers or whatever and cope with them. But no amount of therapy will get rid of my sensory issues. I can just learn to cope better with them. People with like, NPD, CAN go to therapy and deconstruct their behaviors and work on growing from the ones they have that are harmful to themselves and others and that can essentially (for lack of a better word) "cured" with therapy. Things like narcissism aren't genetic. There are some studies showing a difference in grey matter in the brains of people with narcissism but this hasn't been studied deep enough to know whether it actually relates to the narcissism, or something else (like sociopathy or schizophrenia). Also, when it comes to narcissism(speaking about npd bc I have the most personal experience with this pd) usually, the neurotypical peak status quo, the epicenter of success, if a title given to a lot of narcissists. They're more likely to be successful in relationships, and careers, and socializing. It's the harmful behaviors that are criticized, but that is also seen as status quo. My audhd is biological. No amounts of therapy can change that biology, it can only make me better at coping with the symptoms. So I guess, my question is, if therapy can untangle and heal the personality disorder, and if the personality disorder is often gives the impression of a successful person, then how is it neurodivergent? I am one who sticks to my guns when I say "narcissistic abuse" because my mother is a narcissist. Only in the past few years has she been going to therapy, but even in that short amount of time, the things she did that were abusive to others and beneficial for her, she can now identify and deconstruct. She's not heartless because she is a narcissist. It's just a personality trait that's always benefited her. Her being taught and understanding her actions and thoughts and where they come from, has improved her relationship with herself and others tremendously and half the time, it seems like she doesn't even have npd anymore. I see a lot of these posts, and for me, it seems like it's coming from a narcissist, who's personality is very beneficial for them(aside from when they're called out for being abusive), and that they discourage nuanced conversations around this topic, as well as diverts the need to take personal responsibility for ones actions(which is an NPD trait). I understand now everyone has access to the right treatment, and I'm not here to say ppl with personality disorders are evil(there are many personality disorders that signify someone is too kind&compassionate as well) but it just seems there's more of a focus on trying to hide the difference between biological neurodivergence, and society/environment influenced personality patterns. I think doing this makes it so people can't actually find the resources they need and don't actually critique their actions and behaviors and just say "it's nothing I can change/improve" which isn't true. I can't change a lot of my biological symptoms, but I can improve my personality and perception and cope better in order to not hurt others or myself. I don't rlly know how to end this but the intent is good faith discussion. I would like to hear your input.

this got long whoops. mentions of "narc abuse" under cut 👍

short answer tho; npd is a complicated disorder and most research on it is HEAVILY biased by demonizations + "narc abuse" isnt a thing its just abuse + npd effects someones entire life therefore its neurodivergent + npd is literally a divergence in ur brain thats literally neurodivergent by definition lol

i'm personally medicated and in therapy for my npd and i can promise you whole-heartedly it's not a beneficial disorder.

i've had npd my entire life and it has never, EVER, benefited me. my npd has made me lose jobs, friends, and a large part of my social life because i believed myself to be better than them and then cut them out of my life.

i think a lot of people forget npd is primarily a trauma-induced personality disorder, one that comes from the fear of someone leaving you and/or the fear of having someone think they're better than you.

my npd is a both a side effect of other traumas i've experienced and a biological issue. it's not something that can ever fully leave me, and it's not something that i want, nor have benefited from having. npd is literally not something you can change, i know this for a fact because of my years of switching medications and therapists and psychologists.

npd has been heavily demonized in media, especially by people who have been abused and automatically claim it was "narcissistic abuse" when in reality all abuse is just that. abuse. there is no such thing as "narcissistic abuse" because it doesn't fucking exist.

yes, narcissism can lead to abuse. no, narcissistic abuse doesn't exist. it's just abuse. plain and simple. you don't call abuse by neurotypicals "neurotypical abuse", because it's a meaningless term that doesn't mean anything.

npd, in and of itself, is not a disorder that people primarily benefit from. the stories about people benefiting from it are from a very small group of people who do not speak for the majority of us.

npd is something that has affected my entire livelihood, and it will do that until the day i die. i have been labeled an abuser multiple times in my life for simply having it, because in the minds of most people the only thing "narcs" want is to hurt you to gain something. they can never pinpoint what "narcs" want though, because they're all getting angry at someone who doesn't exist. this kind of argument of "not all people with personality disorders are evil" paired with the agreeing of "narc abuse" existing is two things that cannot be true at the same time. "narc abuse" implies that all "narcs" are evil in and of themselves.

npd is neurodivergent because it is something that will forever effect someones life. npd effects everything from your perspective of people, to your perspective of self, to how you see the world around you. it's not an easy thing to live with. npd makes you think everyone is either out to get you, or less than you and therefore not worth your time. it takes a really long time for most pwnpd to warm up to people, and it did for me. it's hard to form friendships when your first reaction to someone is either that they hate you or that they're worse than you.

i dont know how to end this . anyway. narc abuse isnt fucking real its a demonizing term dont use it okay? okay. goodbye

[sophieinwonderland]

Honestly, I never have any idea what you're ever doing, but it always seems to be wrong somehow

That's an interesting observation.

If you'd like to figure out why this may be, may I suggest looking at this page?:

Depending on where you're getting your information from, this may be a result of any number of these.

And this can be a fun conversation to have so let's go.

The Framing Effect

The framing effect is an interesting one where someone's perception of an event or action can be affected by how it's framed.

Compare these two statements:

I share switching and imposition guides.

I teach people to dissociate and hallucinate

Both of these things mean the same thing. You can't have switching guides that don't involve dissociation, and imposition is a tulpamancy skill that generates intentional hallucinations.

These are objectively true statements framed in different ways.

But the latter phrasing feels worse. It's framed in a bad way to invoke an emotional reaction. It made people legitimately angry to hear that I was teaching people to dissociate and hallucinate despite not batting an eye at the information on switching and imposition I had posted for over a year before those statements.

While that one was intentional by me to see what type of reaction I would get, it goes to a lot of other claims about me by others as well, with relatively ordinary things or things they would excuse in allies being framed extremely negative lights.

Once you've fallen victim to The Framing Effect, then you risk...

Confirmation Bias

Something generally neutral or positive has been framed in a bad way. Say, for instance, that your first exposure to me is hearing that I teach people to dissociate and hallucinate.

It's extremely troubling and then lots of other people keep telling you other bad things I've supposedly done. Because your opinion is already formed, you're more likely to be receptive to negatives than positives.

Anything you hear about me that's bad, true or not, gets neatly tucked away in your "Sophie Bad" file. Evidence to the contrary gets thrown out. Oops. 🤷‍♀️

Once your mind is set, getting through that bias is difficult. Especially when you also may be experiencing a form of...

Selection Bias and the Frequency Illusion

You mention not knowing what I'm doing most of the time. So I assume that every time you do hear about me, it's from people who are attacking me.

Basically, every data point you are aware of about me are from people actively spreading the worst things I said, framed in the worst way possible. Not to mention outright lies and misinformation that you may accept due to the previously mentioned confirmation bias.

If your only exposure to my posts are bad things or things taken out of context to look bad, then it would give the illusion that 100% of the things I say are bad.

But I'm sure that you're a rational and intelligent individual who would never fall for these sorts of cognitive biases. Unless...

Well...

What if you have a...

Bias Blindspot

This is a tendency to lack awareness of our own biases. And it's an especially nasty one that reinforces all the biases outlined here while making them practically invisible to our own eyes.

You could have all these biases but be further biased by this blindspot to not seem them.

I'm not sure how best to look past all of these biases, but education about biases and self-reflection can often be a good place to start.

[pistolenprinz]

RDR2 CHARACTERS AS THE MAJOR ARCANA (PT. 4 OF MANY)

I’ve been really digging tarot lately, and finding a lot of comfort/joy indulging in the universe’s energies, so I figured I would try my hand at assigning each of the main gang (with some exceptions) to one of the major arcana, as well as giving my personal interpretations of how it fits. Note: For this post, I’ve dipped into my own deck (Raven Rogue’s Tarotorial), and will be pulling the imagery-specific elements from them. I will cite things as such “Insert text here [Source Name].” Regardless, the actual applications to the plotlines and characters is my own and is my opinion. To cut down on the length of these posts, I’ve privately paired up gang members that I either think provide a good foil for one another, or those that I just think pair well in terms of discussion. This section will be copy-pasted across all the posts in this series for sake of clarity.

BILL WILLIAMSON - JUDGMENT

Judgment presents as adults and children rising from their graves to respond to an angel's trumpet call as they're ready to be judged by the universe. This card deals out absolutes. [Tarotorial; Card Imagery].

Stating the obvious first, Bill is a man who deals in absolute. There is, or there isn't. This is not an inherently bad thing, particularly in the type of environment he finds himself in among the Van der Linde gang; the preservation of the group comes first and foremost…. usually. That said, the question of good or not comes from Bill's inner motives. We see this in RDR2, we see this more in RDR. Bill's motives are, arguably, driven by a simple lack of self-awareness. A 'rules for thee and not for me' mentality, that ultimately leads to him being unable to learn his lessons, and going on to become even more of a brutal terror on his own than he was within the Van der Linde gang (where he, usually, had others to ground him and refocus his purpose). This card's imagery echoes those of Death, reminding the interpreter and viewer that everything comes to an end, damned be the consequences.

MICAH BELL - THE DEVIL

The Devil typically depicts a saytr, known as Baphomet, atop a pedestal behind the chained male and female figures to show that they're under control. The man and woman are ashamed, and becoming less human the longer they're under the Devil's control [Tarotorial; Card Imagery].

Ignoring the explicit evil imagery, the label of "evil" as a whole, and Micah's status as an antagonist within the gang, I want to instead focus on the core of his character. Of the deep-rooted greed that pushes him to become such a powerful force among the members, effectively overturning the dynamic and tipping the scales in his balance. If we look further, into the time before his gang, we see that it's a constant. All he has known is greed and violence, through his father's own outlaw nature. We can look at how vicious the falling out between himself and his brother, Amos, was, with the latter threatening to kill if he'd even considered contact with his family. The Devil itself is less about evil itself, but the intricate acts that may lead to someone being considered evil: Greed, materialism, excess, temptation. All things that Micah exhibits throughout his story, all the way from attempting to "take" Sadie for himself, to confronting Arthur at the end of it all and ensuring that he would not leave freely (with or without the money, as that choice is player determinant). On the other hand, and through the lens of characters such as Bill and Dutch, Micah is a symbol of true freedom. Of releasing one's inner desires and being prideful with them. These tenants are core to the "outlaw" life, in their eyes, just as they are core in the card's other half. There are reasons for his actions, but those actions are not "good", regardless of intent or reason.

[lunargracklepersonal]

Thought I'd share some 4am thoughts on voting. Here's the tl;dr up front: Grackle says vote third party.

Here's my logic. We're in the stage of a failing democracy/impending fascism where we need to essentially tell the drunken idiot at the bar to get out before throwing him out by force.

Biden is our drunken idiot. Don't get me wrong, I'm a trans person. I don't want to see a DeSantis presidency or another Trump presidency or Project 2025 come to fruition either. But between Biden's failure to do anything to protect trans people and his active sponsorship of genocide, I have no intention of voting for him in the future. It would go against both my conscience and my sense of self preservation to do so.

Now, there's this idea of voting blue no matter who. Fuck that. If we do that, all we are doing is allowing the democratic party to be pushed even farther right against our better interests, as that leaves us with no say in who runs the party and who represents us.

There's also game theory and the split vote effect. I counter this by saying we don't need a victory. We need to send a clear message that enough of us disapprove to the point of actively voting for someone else. Someone unexpected.

Now, there's also a case for not voting as a protest against the two-party system and the first-past-the-post vote collection schema, as well as a true sense of disillusionment. A lot of people feel they're choosing mutual aid and direct action over voting and not voting at all. I personally still think it's important to vote (third party, by mail if possible) if you're capable anyway. It's more important to do direct action and mutual aid, so if you truly do have to choose, do those, but I believe in doing both. Not voting tends to send the message that you don't care, which isn't the intent I think you want. I think voting third party, even for a candidate you know is nonviable, is a better act of protest.

My conscience is telling me my own choice is between not voting and voting third party this time. (The alternative being to actively vote for genocide on either side of the aisle.) So I'll take the option and vote for the most viable third party candidate I can find.

[emmetrain]

Who is Emmet--an overview of how I see my portrayal of him;;

Emmet is passion. He is mainly a character who represents fire. His passion and competitiveness overshadow anything else. He burns brightly and his emotions are open for anyone to see. He can be hot-headed and act without thinking. Yet, his call-to-action being so quick serves as a jumpstart for any projects Ingo or others bring to the table.

Emmet has self-sacrificial tendencies and works against himself at times. This comes from the secondary type I see him as: steel. He has his convictions and core beliefs. He is hard to mold, that's true. And he is super-effective against himself with how much he burns. You accidentally touch one of the core beliefs, not realizing the steel frame that holds his mind together is on fire.

Emmet is not after big dreams or wild fantasies. He is just some guy at the end of the day. Bug-type determines the daily life of him; he is one of many, small, hard to notice unless you are in proximity of his niche, which is double and multi battles in the battle facility. Even if you use the commute lines of Nimbasa, he is not someone memorable. He is helpful, but his reach is limited. During the events of B&W and B2&W2, he is no where near the action, since he is tending to his own facility, and mostly held back by Ingo and the fear of losing the normal, quiet life they have.

Electricity is Ingo's type, but Emmet is not harmed by it in return. His draw to electric types, and if we bring in passive powers depending on threads, his power of electricity absorption, is the ultimate proof of how well they complement each other, and how they protect each other. In return, Ingo is not phased by fire, and does not panic easily as Emmet seethes and loses it.

He is also a man of contradictions: he loves himself. So so much. He loves being Emmet, living his "truth" as the meaning of his name hints at. He also has regrets from his past, and does not think highly of himself. Which is, hard for him to address, since for all intent and purposes, he does not have self-hatred. It is subtle, it is an illness in a way, how much he does not like himself or ready for self-sacrifice.

He is incredibly smart, as he is building robot arms and cyborg Joltiks, and gathering immense data from all the battles of Battle Subway to gain meaningful results from them. He is an advance battler and strategist. But despite the intelligence, his wisdom is not it. Nope. He lacks common sense in most absurd ways. He is so painfully unaware in many aspects: social interactions, healthy relationships...

He is a sweet person. His promise with Ingo to be a good person makes him verrry hard to ever cause harm willingly. Yet, he holds grudges, does not address emotional problems, and can be so soooo bitter.

Overall, he is just a man who tries to have a good life, and be good at what he does, which is Pokemon battles. He does not want anything more than a peaceful life with his twin by his side. And I just find him so endearing ;;;

[faint-petrichor]

wild how in the past 8 months so many of the prominent left-lib queer bloggers on this site have came out as zionists and transmisogynists. I've had a lot to reflect on about perceived victimhood and weaponized innocence on both counts, and how they feed into broader structures of violence. i used to focus more on the primary instruments of imperial violence; bombs, cops, sanctions, etc. but now I think about how that violence legitimizes itself despite its abject horror—these things effectively cannot continue to pass without manufactured consent. it is almost always through fear. and when it is not through fear, it's innocence. one says the violence is right and the other absolves you of complicity.

it amounts to nothing, but nonetheless every day I am sick with grief for all the horrible things happening in the world. i struggle to understand how people can be so small minded to think only of themselves at times like these. but the temptation to give in to a judgement on their character is a false one, however horrible their actions are. these attitudes are being produced, instrumentalized and rewarded by power, not arising from uniquely immoral and selfish individuals. but yet, you cannot change the mind of someone with no intent to listen, with a material interest not to. it has driven me mad to try. and in fact, every instance of conflict seems to drive these people further into their hate as their feelings of persecution heighten. a few years ago, my mother was radicalized into a violent gun-toting neonazi off her fox news instilled fears and her white lady persecution complex. nothing I said to change her mind since I was a teenager ever stuck. and then I think, what about all these saccharine liberals? they put so much effort into aligning themselves with incontroversial goodness. that "good" is so easily manipulated, a goodness that is based on no material analysis and eats out of the hand of imperial power. where will they stand tomorrow if this is already where they stand today? i think it's an easy mistake to see people like that as closer to allies than not, especially if they are queer or something like that. more often than not, they have no material interest to change their mind and no true alignment with justice. i guess what i mean to say is, it's clear to me now that committed liberals are not allies and never will be. they will cheer at the dropping of bombs not out of cold misanthropy, but because it makes them feel safe.

it's sickening watching queer community in the imperial core be successfully split and mobilized into a reactionary force, but that is very much what is happening and is necessary to acknowledge as such, between pinkwashing and rising institutionalized transmisogyny. now the gambit is to put trans women to the stake in an attempt to get a pass in the oncoming violence, and yet all that accomplishes is giving them a head start at putting us all in the grave.

fear, safety, comfort, discomfort, disgust, indignance... lately I am acutely aware of how all these emotions are weaponized. these are feelings one must be intensely critical of. emotions are so easily manipulated and instilled in others, so easy to consider uniquely your own when it has been informed entirely by external influences.

the logic of emotion cannot and never will be a logic of justice. it is a reactionary force through and through. both because emotions are so myopic and manipulable, and because they do not produce more than momentary responses. that is why we have materialism, and why we rely on conviction instead. emotional reasoning begins and dies with the individual. it is an atomizing lens to view the world through. this is very useful for imperialist propagandists, fascists etc., and utterly useless for organized and disciplined action. and when it comes to knowing who is an (even potential) ally, I am becoming increasingly sure it is those who regard emotions critically and can decenter themselves.

[idontknowwhatiwantworld]

Can There Be Both Destiny and Free Will? If Not, Which Do You Believe to Be True?

 

  This question has me stumped! I've been coming back to it every other day to try to answer it. I've decided to just write and see where it takes me. This is a tricky topic because I don't think there is a yes or no answer for me, which is exciting. There's so much to discuss.

  Destiny is defined as 'the events that will necessarily happen to a particular person or thing in the future' or 'the hidden power believed to control what will happen in the future; fate.' If those are the two definitions I get to choose from, I'd say I believe in the first one. I believe that humans need something to believe in, whether it's religion, astrology, family values, etc. It gives life a purpose and makes you want to do good things. Also, 'to a particular person or thing' makes me think about predator vs prey; some things just aren't meant to live very long. Predators need to hunt, and the prey are destined to be hunted. What I don't believe is that destiny is always to blame for why things happen; actions have consequences, and I don't think it was my destiny to end up in corporate banking or to end up in shitty relationships in the past. I have the free will to change those things in my life.

  Free will is defined as 'the power of acting without the constraint of necessity or fate; the ability to act at one's own discretion. I get extremely overwhelmed by free will; I believe in it more than I believe in destiny. The reason I find it so overwhelming is because for the past few years I have not acted on it. Truly if I wanted to today I could quit my job and move to another country. Would it be hard? Of course but it is possible, I could buy a one way ticket to anywhere in the world. I don’t need to work a 9-5, that’s what I choose to do with my free will because I love comfortability and consistency. I use to give myself the grace to dream and dream BIG. That has diminished over the years, but I know I will get it back at some point.

  I use to act on my free will more often when i was younger. I am fortunate enough to lead a privileged life in most aspects. I was born into a family that would be defined as poor; my mother lived off the government due to mental health issues. Despite this, my mom still did her best to give us a childhood that I'd say was good. Of course, my mom did things that had a lasting effect on me, but I don't think it was ever intentional; she loved us. We moved from apartment to apartment as we were dependent on section 8 for housing. I've probably lived in six different apartment complexes and went to seven different schools; my childhood lacked consistency (which is why consistency is so important to me now). Sometimes we'd have food, and sometimes we'd have to wait a week for the food stamps to come in before we could eat a proper meal. However, I always went to bed with food in my stomach, laid my head down on a pillow, under a roof. My mom always figured it out.

 One thing that triggered me from living with my mother was the state of our apartments. They were always messy; I'd say my mom had a slight hoarding issue. There was always just stuff all around, always trash everywhere. In order to take a shower, I'd have to climb over what felt like a mountain of clothes on the floor or step on razors, old shampoo bottles, dried up soap before I was able to reach the shower knob. My mother was always home, and she didn't have many friends. The ones she did have were not great. We also didn't have a car, it was hard to get around, we always had to depend on someone.

  I love my mother, but I did not want to end up like her. She wasn't my role model. I wanted a clean space, I wanted a job, and I wanted a car. So I made the choice to work. From the age of 16, I got my first job serving chicken. It was life-changing to finally have money. I got my driver's license and soon after got my first car. I graduated from high school, which was something I didn't think I was able to do. I worked two jobs and was able to move out by 20. Somehow, I ended up in banking and worked my way up. I make more money than my mom would know what to do with. That doesn't mean I don't still struggle I do, but that’s the beauty of free will, I can do anything that I want. I made the decision with my free will to do better. I knew I didn't want to live a life like the one I lived growing up. I wanted to be able to order pizza any day of the week!

  Now, I understand that some people are born into a life that doesn't give them these opportunities. I know there are deep traumas that lead you down a dark path. I am not blind to that. That's why I find this question so hard to answer. That is why I believe in destiny, every deserves a chance to hope for more or hope that there is more to life. My human experience is not the same as yours and it never will be. I do know that we make choices throughout our lives, and we have the power to make those choices because of our free will. I also believe some people are destined to be life's prey. Apologies if this post seems all over the place. I just always have a lot to say!

Photo Link: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/1070941986372239789/

[eclecticsouls]

Life has a funny way of making you see what’s in front of you, for what it is, what it could’ve been, and what it could be. No matter how hard we try to stifle that reflective reality, it smacks us right on the head. For me it’s at night, when everything is quiet, and I’m supposed to fall asleep, when my mind forces me to analyze and go over everything in my life.

Something I had a hard time with from a young age, is getting stuck in the what ifs of my past, and endless possibilities that lay ahead. The present was a place that always terrified me, simply because of the complexities and uncertainties that come with the here and now. People usually belabor the past and future, and tiptoe the present, and there’s a few big reasons we as people are stuck in that cycle.

Firstly, perception of the present is deeply personal. What feels true to you, could be the exact opposite to someone else. What you’re experiencing right now, may be better or worse than it seems, but your perception and emotions could cloud the black and white facts and circumstances of each given moment and experience.

Second, the present and what happens daily is volatile. There’s no consistency or hypothesis when it comes to life; you can plan your life and reactions to a perfect science, and still have unforeseen influences and actions change your trajectory and circumstances. You have no control or heads up when you’re in the present with live events effecting each next moment.

Lastly, there’s finality to the past which makes it unchanged and known of. The past is safe, and the saying goes, ‘hindsight is 20/20’… we have the facts in front of us, which makes it tempting to analyze and interpret something that you could’ve done differently. Then, we as individuals spend our whole lives laser focused on our future; from school, to a career, to friendships and relationships, to a family and home, the list of future events we are conditioned to prepare for, train ourselves for, study for, and aim for, are limitless. Society and our current world pressures this kind of ‘future-driven living’. Naturally, we’re engrained to think this way. How could it be organic, and effortless to live in the present? It is uncomfortable to live for right now, and impossible to think and act without some prejudice to your past, and without fears of your future. To be driven by the moment, only focusing on your current environment and reality, can be quite difficult.

The mind is powerful, how you choose to harness that power can make or break someone, but is one of the most important realities I’ve come to accept and utilize… what a waste it would be to settle in the monotony, and play victim to life.

Mindfulness is a vital way to rewire your thoughts, and focus on today. There are little ways like focusing on your breathing, eating, acknowledging how food tastes, and that you’re sitting down in a chair that is cushioned, can be helpful exercises to change your thoughts. There are bigger ways, like acknowledging how you feel around someone, what they smell like, their body language, and listening to what they’re saying, intently.

What really provokes a change, is acceptance. Accepting present thoughts, accepting what others are saying, accepting that each day could lead to good or bad feelings/outcomes. Accepting each day and giving it your all, without being afraid, uncertain, or sad. Accepting that life goes as it’s supposed to, not as you want it to. When it comes down to it, if you can accept everything, understand your intentions, go into each day hopeful with a light heart, and start with a clean slate, somehow the path gets clearer.

Maybe that promotion you worked hard for was filled by someone else, maybe the house you put an offer on fell through, maybe you have a sick or dying loved one, maybe you’re sick or dying, maybe you flunked out of college, maybe you totaled your car and lost your wallet, maybe you find out the person giving you butterflies is married or into someone new, maybe you fall and break your leg, and maybe every single thing has gone wrong and you have little to no hope left… just keep going, change a thought, change an environment, change your attitude, and focus. Focus on what you want, what you deserve, what you can improve, and mostly, focus on now. Who cares what next year holds? If you put all of your heart, mind, body, and soul into the present with good intentions, and what you can improve on day to day, your future is better already!

[111angelnumbermeaning]

Why do I keep seeing 111

Open Your Heart To Receive A Blessing: What Seeing 111 Angel Number Means!

Are you repeatedly see the number 111 and wonder why do I keep seeing 111?Well, when the angel number 111 makes an appearance in your life, it could be a reminder from the universe to open your heart and consciousness for blessings of abundance.

This powerful symbol promises abundant gifts - material, financial, and spiritual. By believing in this number's positive energy and remembering the power you have to manifest positive intentions into reality, you can start attracting all kinds of blessings into your life.

Let's take a look at five different perspectives from which to understand what seeing 111 can signify. 

Religion And Spirituality Perspective

In many spiritual circles, the number 111 is believed to signify divine assistance and guidance. It is also confirmed that you are on the right path in life.

Therefore, seeing 111 often may signify that someone (or something) is watching over you and will provide aid when needed. 

Generally speaking, this number is associated with manifestation energy and being in alignment with the Divine. 

Some believe it's a reminder that you are connected to Source energy and your highest self—a sign from the Universe that all things are possible if we put our faith in them. 

Psychic Perspective

From a psychic standpoint, seeing the number 111 can be interpreted as a call for personal transformation and growth. It invites us to go within ourselves to get in touch with our intuition and make decisions from there rather than relying on external sources.

This number also encourages us to move beyond fear-based thinking or behavior to tap into our true potential. 

Astrology Perspective

The astrological perspective of 111 suggests that an individual will soon experience intense growth and transformation. 

It could include changes in career or relationships; regardless, this phase should bring about positive outcomes with long-term effects once completed.

Psychology Perspective

This figure symbolizes awakening and enlightenment for those who adhere to psychological beliefs regarding numbers like 111.

It may represent someone coming out of their shell or shedding old beliefs for newer ones with higher vibrational frequencies.

Sometimes, it serves as a reminder not to focus too much on past experiences but instead move forward in life with an open heart and mind.

Numerology Perspective

In numerology, 111 is considered a master number. It is believed that when you see this number, it's a sign from the Universe to pay attention to your thoughts and intentions.

The number 1 symbolizes new beginnings and taking action toward manifesting your dreams. Seeing 111 can be interpreted as an invitation to become aware of your thoughts and take steps towards making them a reality. 

Conclusion:

Seeing the angelic number 111 signifies that you should open your heart to receive blessings. It may indicate divine assistance and guidance, an invitation for personal transformation, or an indication of intense growth and change.

Whatever the meaning behind it may be, remember to stay connected to your higher self and trust in the Universe's plan for your life.

You can manifest your dreams and live a fulfilling life with an open heart and mind.

May the blessings be with you! If you want to know more about What Does 111 Mean Spiritually, visit our website.

[bieddiediaz]

i just had to read a long and winding argument, made multiple times over, that said attacking people for writing racist fic is practically as bad as racist fic itself, and we should be taking time to educate people about what they're doing wrong and how they can be better. on the surface, that sounds like a fair point, but there are two big problems with it:

a) everything that's been happening in fandom over the past few days is not the beginning, it is the breaking point. people have been told - publicly, privately, in comments, dms, asks, vagueposts - about what they've been doing wrong and why, how they can fix it, but they refuse to listen. our first reaction is not mindless attacking! we do not want to be angry! we do not want to feel this way! this is a culmination of the months and years that racist authors have been repeatedly told and explained to why their fics are harmful and they have simply. refused to fucking listen! after one point, kindness will run out. patience will run out. we are not here to coddle racists who are not willing to even have a fucking conversation.

b) it. is. not. the. job. of people of colour. to. educate. you. we are not your mother. we are not your teacher. you are an adult on the internet, putting harmful things out there for the world to see, and making fandom unsafe for all the people of colour out here. it's true that people who are unknowingly ignorant are not on the same level as out and proud racists, but no matter your intent - if you are putting racist writing out into the world, the effect of your actions is racist, whether you meant to be or not. poc can and have tried to educate people, but it is not our fucking job. we are not obligated to be your teachers. if someone is repeatedly putting out racist writing, i care very little about their intentions, and more about their actions and the effect they have. we have a right to be angry. we have a right to be loud. you do not get to call us aggressors or 'as bad as racists' for being loud about our anger! yes, it is great if a poc (or even another white person) does try to educate people about what was wrong with what they did, but that is a kindness we are doing for you! that is not what should be expected of us! IT. IS. NOT. OUR. JOB.