#and i cant be bothered to like. make it even and shit like that

[queersyourgender]

Could you possibly maybe write a Mateo diaz x reader??? The plot could be whatever you want but if you wanted a couple ideas it could be

Mateo and reader are dating/engaged, she works in psych but got padged to the ER or sent there either to deal with a patient or she got assaulted by a patient and needed help.

Or

Mateo x reader where shes jealous about Victoria having such an obvious crush on Mateo

Love your work sm! I hope you can write somthing for Mateo, I cant find any x reader with him and hes my favorite <3

Run of the Mill — Mateo Diaz x F!Reader

Notes: Eeee tysm for your sweet words! Mateo is a gem and I'd be happy to write something of him for you! Here's what I've got, I hope you like it! Brief references to accidental elbowing!

———

“Don't tell Mateo,” is the first thing that flies out of your mouth as your curtain slides open and Cassie's eyes land on you, instantly going wide and horrified by the sight of your gnarly black eye.

“Holy shit, what happened?” Cassie asks worriedly, immediately cradling your face in her hands and turning it side to side to observe you. She shines the light in your eyes, watches how your pupils react, the whole shebang. “How long have you been down here? I didn't even see your name on the board.”

You grimace as she lightly touches the area around your eye, clearly assessing for fractures in your skull. The thought frightens you a little, but after being a psych nurse for who knows how long, this is pretty run of the mill to you. “I just got here,” you confess, shrugging sheepishly at her. “They wouldn't let me walk it off upstairs.”

Cassie shoots you a glare that tells you just how bad an idea that is. “Of course they wouldn't, have you looked in the mirror?” She tells you, shaking her head in that every-disappointed motherly way she does whenever one of you lot is being stupid. “You look terrible, hon.”

“Jeez, Cass, tell me how you really feel,” you try to joke, only to end up winning as she presses her thumb at a particularly tender spot. She gives you a sympathetic smile and starts rattling off the things she's about to send you to do, from x-rays to CTs, when you see him in the distance.

The margin of spotting each other is quite literally the tiny gap in between the closed curtains, but you'd recognize that mop of curls anywhere. He's walking towards you, and you make a panicked noise, flailing your hands about and grabbing at Cassie's scrubs.

“Quick, don't let him see me!” You whisper-yell, trying to physically hide behind her as your fiancé gets ever closer to the two of you. Cassie doesn't budge where you pull her, because she's a traitor who wants you to get caught, just stands there and laughs.

“Is that my sweet angel future-wife's voice I hear behind this curtain?” Mateo's playfully days from the other side, cheerful and happy as he always is, until he pushes the curtain aside and sees the scene. Immediately, his smile falls and his easy going nature makes way for abject shock. “What the fuck?”

“Baby, don't freak out!” You immediately try to placate, holding your palms out for him to take. He does so immediately, of course, and you feel guilt gnaw at you at the slight tremor of his hands in yours. “A patient accidentally elbowed me during an episode, but they didn't mean to! I'm okay, promise. Tell him, Cass.”

“It looks worse than it is,” she offers weakly, and you shoot her a glare that says that's not helping as Mateo makes an even more worried sound and cups your face in his hands. He does the same exact spiel Cassie just did, but you don't bother trying to stop him. “She'll be fine, if she's a good girl and gets her scans done.”

“My girl is always good,” Mateo retorts quickly, almost reflexively, and your face flushes slightly as Cassie shakes her head in endearment at the two of you and walks away, tugging the curtain closed behind herself to give you two some privacy.

Carefully, Mateo pushes his forehead against yours, cautious to keep away from the bruised side of your face as he does so. “Would it kill you to be more careful?” He asks you exasperatedly, and you give him a shit-eating grin, twirling one of his curls around your finger to play with.

“It was an accident,” you remind him, and Mateo rolls his eyes fondly at your insistence. Instead of lecturing you, though, he settles on placing a chaste kiss over your darkened brow, thumbing at your swollen cheek and exhaling softly.

“You're going to be the death of me,” he murmurs against your skin, and you laugh as you thread the fingers of your other hands together and pull him down ever closer to yourself.

“Is that why they say 'til death do us part?” You ponder aloud, and Mateo snorts and quiets you by moving down to kiss your lips instead.

[courfee]

James who is a successful author and Regulus who is an expert in some very niche field and James' newest book happens to make references to said niche field. Only James got it wrong and Regulus absolutely drags him on social media for it, founds some kind of James Potter hate club and insists the entire book is bad because what kind of author doesn't even do proper research

[papakhan]

I swear if I see another post in the fnv main tag about how Arcade would actually be okay with Boone murdering children and arguing that those children are actually dangerous threats who deserve to be shot because "Oh he said he feels for the soldiers in one ambient voice line and also his parents are war criminals 😇😇"

Arcade's whole story is about his baggage and discomfort with his family being violent fascist war criminals. Like. it's literally his entire quest. The only reason he comes up with defences for them is because he's seen the good in them, and even that gets him feeling conflicted. Let's not forget Arcade will join the courier in KILLING Orion Moreno if he can't let go of the Enclave's ideals, he will literally kill this close family friend. Arcade will literally open fire on The Courier who gleefully activates Archimedes. Arcade will berate and yell at a Legion-aligned courier until he thinks its not worth it anymore. Arcade is Not kind to war criminals or fascists.

Boone saying shit like this?

You really think Arcade is going to feel even a little bit charitable or merciful after hearing THAT come from Craig's mouth? don't make me laugh. Arcade is absolutely not the fucking guy to be like "Actually killing children might be justified" I don't fucking care what his ambient line says.

[yellllowstar]

yeah so like I need you to find me this and post it pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease

and absolutely terrible for non speaking ryley headcanons I'm having a crisis as we speak

the formatting on this isnt as good as the screenshots you found, so apologies for that, but here

funnily enough its the one literally right after those two you found

also just for funsies im gonna put all of the rest of the ryley entries below a cut, some of them are the ones that made it into the final game, i know one of them is also on the wiki page for databank (below zero) under "cut or currently unobtainable databank entries", and two of them are the ones you found, but i still find it interesting to read them in order.

[callmegaith]

hl1 Barney supremacy. Send post.

ANON YOU GET ME I NEED TO SQUEEZE HIM LIKE THIS

I know I said this a lot but the low def Barney model follows such a niche character design that I just adore so much that when I saw him in hl2 I was like "... No. That's not the same character what are you talking about?"

I think hl2 Barney is fine if he was his own character and not Barney. Listen I'm an old man enjoyer, I'd love hl2 Barney regardless just cuz his raven greying hair and charisma but HL1 BARNEY SUPREMACY!!

I seriously need to work on my own design for him that follows his hl1 model. I said I would after I finished playing hl2 (which I did.) so maybe tomorrow c:

[clumsypuppy]

adhd comix

[oceanwithouthermoon]

i think its weird that i have to make this disclaimer but the internet is crazy so wtvr,, anyway,,

if i say i dont like something, that doesnt mean "that thing is bad and nobody should post it.."

i swear literally every time i even mention that i dislike something, people will go "wow does that mean u fucking hate me cuz i post that thing? ur a fucking stupid bitch and all ur opinions r wrong" LIKE ?? er.. no. just because i say i dont like certain characterizations of certain characters (the saiki k fandom is CRAZY about this cuz i can state an opinion on literally any character and a group of people will still go 'well only we're allowed to post our opinions about them because we're always right!1!1!'), or certain ship tropes (mentioned my hatred of toxic yaoi maybe once or twice on here months ago and people STILL get mad at me as if i said toxic yaoi lovers r evil or something), or certain ships, or WHATEVER, does not mean that i HATE the people who are posting them or that i think they shouldnt post them at all, NO, im just posting about my personal tastes on my personal blog and it would be extremely weird and hypocritical if i decided that i was the ONLY person that was allowed to do that,,

i think the only reason people assume that is because there are a lot of other people on here who ARE like that, and a lot of people toe the line between posting that they dont like something and posting that they think everyone who likes that thing is stupid, annoying, and wrong,, so i guess all i can say is, sorry for whatever made you make these assumptions but they arent true about me so plz leave me alone ʘ‿ʘ ur doing the same thing to me that ur accusing me of but i didnt do it in the first place so ur just actively being a dick for no reason

[memorys-skyscraper]

taking donations of any and all good employment-related vibes rn

[alchemiclee]

I hate that whenever there's a gay ship, people immediately het-ify it. people are so obsessed with making one the "man" and one the "woman" when that's completely unnecessary, because they are both the man or the woman. It's extremely annoying. these people will completely mischaracterize a character to fit into their stupid little het roles they force on them.

for example, you don't need to make one man the "wife" and feminized him to the extreme and fit him in a traditional "woman" role so the other man can be the big strong masculine manly man. they can both be masculine or both be feminine or both be both at the same time! they do NOT need to be gendered opposites to fit het roles. crazy, I know! it's like no one considers it a possibility! or sees how good it can be to have them be equals without gendered nonsense.

when there's a gay relationship, you have the perfect opportunity for the couple to stand on equal ground. they get to be equals who are just as strong and just as soft as each other. there's no faulty power dynamics where one is above the other (because let's face it, society unfortunately deems masculinity > femininity). one doesn't need to protect the other. they can protect themsleves, fight aide by side as equals. one doesn't do all the housework. they share that duty equally. one isn't weak and pretty, while they other strong and manly. they both are strong and pretty, or masculine and weak at the same time.

equal relationships are amazing and need to be explored more and appreciated. there can be more understanding and working together. i'm bad at explaining what I mean, but I prefer these equal relationships over forcing them into opposite roles to mirror het relationships, which are usually extremely unbalanced and unequal. especially because these not het relationships! so why must they look like one? they can and should look different! so why does literally every shipper and writer out there make them so het coded?

I don't understand why people do this. do they actually believe all romantic relationships must mimic het ones to exist and thrive and purposely force that on them? or have they genuinely just not fathamed that they can be different and dont need to follow the expected het standards?

I wonder, it feels like no one actually knows how non-het relationships are meant to be and how they could work, since het ones are always forced down our throats since birth. it becomes The Standard that everyone thinks they must follow. maybe it's all people know since they don't see any other possibilities. their preferred dynamics for their ships are what we are taught and nothing different, because they don't know it can be different. i also think people might be obsessed with that whole "opposites attract" trope. but that opposite doesn't have to be the traditional het-fueld feminine vs masculine or wife vs husband characteristics. it can be other personality things like one is loud and one is quiet, one is dumb and one is overly smart, one is rich and one poor, etc. it doesn't have to be masculine vs feminine!

BREAK OUT OF THE HET NORMS!!!!! TEAR DOWN HETERONORMATIVITY!!!!!!!!! FREE THE GAYS

(disclaimer, not saying masculine vs feminine ships are all bad/shouldn't be done ever. but it doesn't need to be 100% of the time either 😅 can't think of one ship people dont do this with lol)

[gaylightisminetocommand]

the urge to just run off into the middle of nowhere and start a new life where no one knows u

[shinkai-kaiju]

i think genuinely i will actually kill someone if i have to stay here any longer. like actually.

[indecisive-dizzy]

y0utube needs an option to remove horror movie ads. or at least make all of them skippable ffs

[okcoolthanks]

I feel like my family’s getting sick of me

[shikiimisaki]

*walks in, removes eye protective wear and hangs up labcoat after a long day of Observing One Piece Ship Discourse On Twitter fieldwork* so while it may appear strange that people really readily say "luffy is canon aroace/doesnt care about any of that" whenever someone makes a truther post about luffy/hancock and then those same people may turn around and share a bunch of posts about gay ships involving luffy, it's actually more of a symptom of the fact that while most people posting said gay luffy ships are completely aware that their ships will not/could not/probably even should not actually be canon and are deep in the hypothetical, many dudebro types who ship luffy with hancock are completely convinced that their ship absolutely should or even will become canon, simply because he is a male protagonist and she is an extremely attractive woman who is interested in him, and it makes "no sense" for luffy to not go with her, either because they think that is how Stories Should Work (heteronormativity) or because they want Coolguy Chad Luffy and think having a hot woman obsessed with him like, adds to his coolness points in some vague objectifying way, which got more and more misogynistic sounding the longer i tried to find a way to word that sentence. this last interpretation does disservice to both of their characters and frankly, completely doesn't comply with any of the reasons hancock fell in love with him in canon in the first place. if you look for more then a minute at either of their characters you can tell that in canon it would never work, not even just because luffy is completely and entirely disinterested and in all likelihood that will never change, but because although I would say hancock's love is based on real traits of his she respects and was deeply moved by, she idolizes him and her fantasies about being with him involve shit he wouldn't actually do or say. she loves him because he's, literally, the only man she's ever met- and in the current day, often only person she knows across the board besides literally her sisters, who doesn't immediately treat her like a sexual object- and he only doesn't because of his fundamental and absolute disinterest in her, romantically or sexually. they exist in a paradox, and that paradox is used as a source of comic relief. what they have going on would be LESS interesting if he liked her in that way. if he was interested in her she would not like him in the first place. this got really off topic sorry. what im saying is this is why 1 person posting about how luffy and hancock are Totally Canon Endgame because who could turn down such a bad bitch!!!!!!! is a mischaracterization statement that prompts response or backlash in a way that 20 people posting zolu making out sloppy style in a corner completely aware that they are indulging in a mirror dimension and He Would Not Fucking Say That is not

[dangerliesbeforeyou]

ok i did it (finally) lol, i swapped over to firefox after having used chrome for probably nearly the entire time i've had access to a computer lol...

[milf-harrington]

where im at mentally these days: my mum hugged me and said im doing a good job and i burst into tears <3