#and i like that space a lot but i'm considering muting it which makes me sad

[astriiformes]

.

[bacchicly]

A few imperfect thoughts about writing fat characters respectfully

By me :

A short (5'2"), fat (approx 300 pounds), middle aged (turning 42 thank god), married to not a fat man, mother of a pre-teen, white, CIS, Anglo, Canadian, upper-middle class woman who writes fic (including smut) about a character who is fat by TV and Hollywood standards (Penelope Garcia)

Note: fat hate or debates about whether being fat is healthy or not will not be tolerated on this post. That is not what this post is about. This is about giving some insight into what writers may want to consider when trying to respectfully include more fat characters in their work and generally moving towards writing doing less harm to fat people.

This post started with me wanting to respond to someone honnestly asking "how do I write good descriptions of fat people" because they wanted to write more fat characters and write them authentically (and I assume in a way that would be respectful to fat people) which is an awesome! ...Or maybe it started a few months ago when a writer friend asked about whether a fat character in a fic borrowing a shirt or hoody from her fit boyfriend made sense. ...Or maybe it started way back when I started writing my first fan fic featuring Penelope Garcia partly in response to being irritated about how so many writers wrote her as a young woman and were often silent on her size or spent a lot of time on her insecurities about her body... anyhoo that's where I come from... doesn't make me an expert except maybe on my own unique experience with a fat body...rather more a fellow muddler / fat character writer enthusiast.

THE BASICS

This first part is a quick list of basics you'll read in other posts about writing characters in general - but we'd better get them out of the way because they apply:

Every character is unique and they way they act and think and feel tends to be a product of some mix of what they look like, how their body works or doesn't, how their brain works and doesn't, their "personality", what they were taught, their unique experiences, and the situation/society they are currently in. There are patterns (which is why we get tropes) but the fun thing is that small things can make big differences. So to write an authentic character, it helps to have a fairly clear sense of at least some of those elements and do some imagining about how all of that would funnel into the moment your writing.

The amount to which you describe character bodies and the style which you use to describe them tends to depend on genre, what the heck is going on in your story, the pov you're writing from, the reason you're writing etc. So their are no hard or fast rules. There may be norms for certain styles of fiction, but then it's up to you to decide if it's stronger for you to lean into those norms or to write "against" them at a particular moment.

In order to be more respectful and less harmful to fat people (especially if you see value in actively challenging the anti-fat status quo), you may have to change how you describe all bodies in your work, as well the attitudes both fat people and non fat people have about bodies in general.

Now that that's out of the way... let's get specifically to my thoughts on writing fat characters. I'm going to divide this part into tips for DESCRIBING FAT BODIES, FAT BODIES IN SPACE, and THINKING AND FEELING IN A FAT BODY.

TIPS FOR DESCRIBING FAT (OR OTHER) BODIES

I would say that both consistency and diversity across the work is important, by this I mean :

Consistently describe bodies in about the same amount of detail across your work for the same type of character regardless of body type. So protagonists should get about the same depth and breath of body descriptions as each other regardless of body type. Same goes for vilalns, supporting characters etc. Sometimes people are mute about the look and shape of "strait sized" character bodies (because what's to describe - they are just "normal") but then spend a bunch of time on "other sized" bodies or vice versa (in this case, the fat body is erased usually because of some form of internalised fat hate or phobia paired with "if you can't say anything nice" don't say anything at all.) If you're doing either of these things, I'm not saying it's wrong and has to be fixed- I'm just saying it's a flag that you may want to think about why you are writing differently about different body types and what your work is saying about what bodies have value and which don't.

Diversity Bodies in the real world come in a lot of different shapes and sizes (I know I know obvious woman strikes again) but if you are writing stories with fairly large casts and everyone has the same body type - there better be a good reason for it within the narrative. Truthfully there are cases where this does make sense to some degree... if you're writing about a group where there are physical requirements and standards for the folks in that world (ballet dancers, fire fighters, cops, soldiers, fbi agents) there may or may not be less diversity in body type and more homogeneous attitudes to body norms within the group - and certainly those who are outside of the norm may be commented on or feel like they are "other". But if you are in a more free setting - if you write without a diversity of body types - especially in settings where there is diversity - that is probably a clue that you're not thinking enough about what your various characters look like and may be "normalizing" one type of body over others. Similarly, if you are writing about a real time and place where there is evidence that there were fat bodies and you have none...that's another flag to ask yourself why.

The magical tools in your toolkit for describing fat and other bodies: Body neutrality and POV

Body neutrality is about not loving bodies and not hating bodies just accepting bodies as they are....or in this case describing them as they are. No poetic language. No judgement. Just this is what this character looks like. If you're struggling to do this, I suggest doing a body map for at least two characters with different body types - possibly one that you find easy to think of positively (in this case likely someone thin or at least fit) and one that you find more difficult to describe positively (in this case someone fat).

Describe them head to toe, naked and then clothed, in detail - acurately but not poetically. Start with their feet and then work up bit by bit. Pay attention to things like hair, scars, shape of joints, acne, tightness or looseness of skin, colour of skin, nails, fat, lack of fat, muscle tone, where do they hold their stress, what's in the bowels, how well they do or don't work, do they have their appendix, what they ate last, proportions (is their torso long or short compared to their legs), lungs - how much do they hold, are they healthy? - now describe their throat, shoulders, hands, hair, then end with face.

The only rule is no positive or negative connotations to anything. it's neither good nor bad that they have stretch marks - they just do and they have faded to silver. Now that you "see them' clearly - now look at them through the eyes of someone who loves them in a familial way...what do they see most? what words do they use? now through someone who is attracted to them sexually and love them and aren't ashamed...what do they see most? what words do they use? Now through the eyes of someone who hates them or wants to change them? or a child? or a dog? Now... how does your character feel about these descriptions? Now you have a variety of words you can draw on to describe the body and you also should have a fairly good idea of what is a more skewed view of the body and a more realistic view.

Also...it can be helpful to remember there are no consistently good or bad words to describe bodies - it depends on context and who is using the words. It's a lot like how sick can be used to describe something negatively or positively depending on the agreed upon meaning of the word by a group.

DESCRIBING BODIES IN SPACE/MOTION

Ok here's the thing - for every activity you can think of - there is a fat body that does it well and a fat body that can't do it easily or at all and there are a lot of reasons for both. Often it has to do with the fact that a lot of equipment is built for people who are 250lbs or less; and anything for bigger people tends to cost a premium. Also, if it's not an easy new skill to acquire with the body you've got...it may take longer and more bravery to keep pushing through to achieve mastery. People may try to discourage you from pursuing things. Sometimes out of prejudice, sometimes out of impatience, sometimes out of caring.

So deciding what your character's body can do easily and what it can't and why is more important than me giving you a list of words for how to describe fat movements.

My suggestion is: do your research. What sorts of body types have done the activity in the real world? What are the exceptions? What changes? So for example if a fat person is climbing a mountain - do they need more help? Different equipment? A different route?

Things to consider:

- equipment / things that can have weight limits: bunk beds, roller coasters, scooters, waterslides, camping chairs, elevators, trampolines, some bikes, life jackets (finding one that fit was a nightmare), exercise balls, airline seats (learning to ask for the seatbelt extender without second thought or shame was a lifesaver)

- not all fat people have pain, those who do will move taking into account the specifics of the pain - same as a lean person

- when I was pregnant I just got more cylindrical and did not get a classic belly. I moved well and easily all the way through my pregnancy, I had none of the back pain or ankle pain some people get. I stood for a lot of my labour. I gave birth on my hands and knees. Other fat people will have had different experiences of pregnancy...but that was mine.

- clothing can have a huge impact on what bounces or jiggles and what doesn't

- most (but not all) fat people I know are particularly sensitive to appearing sweaty or smelling bad

- how winded someone gets is not directly correlated to body size, neither is heart rate or breathing style; I have theatre training and grew up swimming - I breath very slowly and very deeply normally - so when I talk a slow deep breath...it is very slow and deep indeed. I have always been fat but can swim forever - I have always gotten winded and kind of dizzy running... Other fat people may be opposite.

- people do not "see fat" consistently. People regularly underestimate how fat I am (by 100+ pounds or many clothing sizes) because I am short, well spoken, proportioned in a way that is seen as fairly typical, and very mobile and very light on my feet. Someone who weighs less than me but is slower moving, dull witted, in a sour mood, is illl, or poorly dressed may be perceived as much heavier than than someone the same weight or heavier who is behaving/clothed differently (which can change how much fat hate someone experiences) and definately heavier than they are. Height also changes how people perceive weight.

- many stores still don't carry plus sized clothing, but eventually i sort of got used to it - although some days it makes me angry and other days sad

- chairs with arms or the occasional booth can be uncomfortable or just plain impossible to sit in, it's probably partly my ADHD but I often forget this until it happens; for taller and fatter people than me this can be a much more regular occurrence.

- once (if) a character figures out how to dress/move their body in a way that feels comfortable and meets general standards (or at least theirs) of respectability - they may not think that much about their body...or at least until something external draws attention to it

- I don't like feeling like I'm squishing people, so I will make myself small and still on buses or at the theatre, I also don't like sitting on laps or being lifted or carried.

- I often feel much taller than I actually am - except when I am standing right beside someone taller or am trying to reach something on a high shelf. The same principle applies - I feel larger next to smaller people and smaller next to larger ones.

- clothing and what I'm carrying also changes how I move (just like my lean counterparts)

- I don't lounge, my car seat is set almost straight but I sit further back than my brother in law who has a similar height and weight - he leans the seat back but pulls closer. I don't nap. My leaner husband both lounges and naps.

- some fat folks eat, walk, and move quickly - some slowly; figuring out which your character does, when they behave "out of character", and why these are their preferences will go a long way to creating an authentic feeling fat character

- acne is a thing and learning to accept ones rolls and tummy aprons (and thus take care of them properly) is a common challenge; although many do it naturally without thinking much of it. You lift your breasts and wash underneath - you lift you belly and wash underneath.

- fat bodies have the same reactions as everyone else: they tingle, burn, get numb, get goose bumps, like to be touched in certain places and in certain ways, feel the breeze, get hot, get cold, shiver, stretch, relax, get aroused, feel release, hold tension, feel capable and strong, feel weak...no matter who you are sitting in a chair that's too small for you will put pressure on your body and feel uncomfortable or safe ..you can explore what that is like. Sometimes it is a reassuring sensation. Sometimes it is uncomfortable. This is the same for fat bodies. It just may happen more frequently and depending on your character's context and experience the emotional reaction / thoughts that are generated may be a bit different.

THINKING AND FEELING IN A FAT BODY.

I think I touched on some of this in some of the earlier sections...but here I want to talk a bit about my experience of being fat and my thoughts about it - your fat characters may or may not feel similarly...but my hope is that you at least think about options as opposed to only writing one or two types of fat character.

I mainly "feel" fat in moments when it is pointed out to me or I am limited in what I can do because of it

I quite like my body, it is my home and I feel very connected to it's features. In my experience this is unusual for many people in North American society regardless of actual body shape or weight. Sometimes I feel guilty for not hating my body the way "I am supposed to" and wonder vaguely if my body would be different if I could hate it more (although as I get older I doubt it).

I do feel some pressure to be a cheerful "good" fat person as a way to stay safe and survive.

Nothing makes people more uncomfortable than me calling myself fat without judgement or asking for accomodation matter of factly. It took me a long time to feel comfortable doing so, but I do it now all the time and it makes my life better.

I felt some pressure to be the fun friend who people feel comfortable eating whatever they wanted with and I often felt like I was depended on to order dessert so they could too. This may have been all in my mind though.

Fat bellies can be very intimate places.

Not all fat people have dieted, but many have. I was lucky enough to never be forced into a diet. I did try keto once but it was a bit intense and nuts so I stopped. I learned a bunch doing it though.

Medical people not treating you appropriately when your fat is 100% a thing.

Internalised fat hate and fat phobia is a thing for many fat people and it pops up at weird moments.

I don 't.give a damn about being in a bathing suit. As long as it fits and my boobs and butt.aren't.falling out - I am happy and feel very attractive. In fact I am probably at my most comfortable in a bathing suit or naked. My body is mine in both those instances.

To reach the "healthy weight" for my height - I would have to lose half of my body mass. That is a lot of me to loose. Embarking on something like that would be totally different than loosing 5 or 10 pounds. Trying to navigate the various medical opinions about whether being fat is bad or not is exhausting.

For me, being fat and older is easier than being fat and younger. This could easily be the opposite for someone else.

Some fat people are into sex, some are not . Some folks are into sex with fat people and some are not. Some are nice about it. Some are not. Some want nice. Some do not.

Fat people are all around you living their best life or their worst life or somewhere in between. We know we are fat. We sometimes care and sometimes don't.

Ok that's it. I don't know if it will help anyone or if it's just a collection of rambles - but at the end of the day...fat people are just people. We are not going to go away. We are all sorts. We are the heroes of our own stories. We are people who are loved, depended on, hated, ignored, and/or spotlighted.

Some fat people think about being fat all the time. Some rarely. Just please don't erase us or other us.

Just by taking the step to interrogate your own biases and any feelings / assumptions you have about fatness/thinness is a huge step and will help limit the harm you could unintentionally do to fat people...actually to all people. Like all forms of hate and intelorance - Fat hate hurts EVERYONE. I would argue it privileges a few...but even that can be excruciating for the individuals who strive to retain that priviledge. We need to dismantle it.

[zoropookie]

HOW HATERS ARE BORN (HHAB)

♡ chapter thirty-three — give it time (💋)

“I’ll admit, you made it look like a home.”

You looked around, enamored by the mutable blend of the other’s home. There was oddly a cozy charm that bled in the space, a mixture of contrasts that you wouldn’t have thought he would involve himself with.

There were soft shadows playing against the walls, promenaded by the warm and golden glow of the lamps. It was really elegant in here, yet, meticulously chosen to make you feel comfortable enough to sit down on the obviously expensive furniture.

“Didn’t know you had a…knack for interior design either.” You said hesitantly, looking at a very abstract tiny statue of a triangle on one of the shelves. Even thought you were interested, it still just felt like a painted on canvas for you. Kind of like...the idea that there can be paint on a canvas, but it doesn't make it a painting. "Learning a lot more about you everyday."

"It wasn't my idea," He sighed. "I told the interior designer 'not too many colors', and I guess she thought I was talking about completely mute."

"Feels like a sanctuary," you murmured.

Despite the dismissive words he gave you, the effort that was put into everything was clearly crafted and corroborated. You walked over to the books sitting on the coffee table, the only things out of place from the rest of the textures, reading the hard cover and smiling.

"You're really considering it?" You asked, to which Kuni turned towards you, "Taking care of the orchard outside."

He shrugged, his eyes moving back to making tea in the kitchen. "I don't have a choice. It's either me who does it, or it dies."

"That's not true, you can always pay someone to do it for you. I know there's a lot of people who may want it for themselves, it's completely healthy." You rambled, trying to see it through the long windows. "I take it that was a housewarming gift too?"

"From Furina. Came with the house, thought it'd be funny to see me struggle with something mundane."

"I heard," You grinned, not being able to keep your laugh in. "Love that for you, it's like a package deal! Did it work?"

He sighed again, running a hand through his hair at the thought. "I guess, I don't know," He started pour the tea once the pot began to steam. "I know her goal was to drive me insane. A constant reminder that no matter how far I try to distance myself from complications, they find a way to root themselves in my life."

"Hey, I wouldn't see it as that." You chuckled, the sound mixing with the soft clinking of the ceramic cups he was setting on the table. "It's probably just a way to keep you grounded after everything."

"I don't see the appeal in tending to trees."

"Maybe it's not even about that," You mused. "Maybe it's just about finding a healthy medium in your life, don't suppose you had that before, right?" You said, teasingly.

He rolled his eyes at you, a humored smile tugging at his lips. "You're one to preach about silver linings."

Your jaw dropped, a small scoff coming from your mouth. "I actually came here to truce, thank you very much. Even though you're the one who tried to run away from me — news flash, didn't work, genius. Still pissed off about that. I'm glad that Furina is looking to help you as much as she's looking to out you."

"Running away is my thing." He squinted playfully, "Like she's big help anyway. The only reason she's in on it is because she wants us to have this romance trope going on for real this time. It's stupid as fuck."

You paused at his words, feeling yourself swallow a big lump some of the tea nestled in your mouth. You shivered at the heat that washed on you, pursing your lips in thought as you let the conversation simmer. The two of you standing in a companionable silence. The trees outside rustled gently in the breeze, their leaves a vibrant contrast to the muted tones inside.

"I mean, I don't know," You paused, cringing as your fingers tightened on your cup. "I don't think it's stupid."

Kuni stiffened too, gaze flickering away for a moment before returning to meet yours. There was a certain look that you've never seen before from him. You couldn't decipher his actual feelings. "I figured."

Your cheeks flushed. "Holy shit, never mind if you were expecting it already." You hissed to yourself, trying to ebb how much embarrassment was on your skin. "Look, I need to check into my hotel soon—"

"Sit down." He cut you off, assertiveness in his tone enough to get you to immediately listen, plopping back down. There was an unexpected gravity that was with him, another departure from his nonchalant attitude.

Your heart hammered rapid fire in your chest, a mix of fear and total apprehension were doing a waltz on your general disposition. The more time you were here, the more you worried about the next time you'll make an absolute fucking fool of yourself. You fidgeted with your fingers.

"What really brought you here." He asked, expectantly. "First thing you give me is a hug, and some words of affirmation. You're not here just to catch up, especially after I blew you off."

"I wanted to see you again." You admitted, the weight of your own words pressing down on you. "You owned up to it, left your part of the Internet in a spiral, and then didn't bother to talk to me after that."

He was looking at you, you sensed it. And it wasn't like you could look at him back, otherwise you were going to melt. It was different seeing him from up close, it was an original experience to you if you could name it anything.

His eyes were searching you, despite all you said, as if trying to decipher if you were being genuine. His eyes bored into you like a tiny laser burning your skin. He nodded, a sliver of understanding crossing his face. "You gave me the impression that you were done. I left it at that."

"Yeah, well, I felt like the only one who could leave it at anything was me."

Despite how sticky and tense it was again, you felt relieved that he wasn't as malicious as he was behind the screen. You were relieved that at least the worst of it was over. But it didn't didn't help the burning in your chest, the aching of the bubble in your throat. "Ei really made you do all that stuff? It's not because you really do hate me, right?"

There was no more pretending anymore, no more hiding behind false bravado or dissing each other behind screens like pussies. It was only raw honesty, vulnerable and exposed.

"(Y/N)." His expression softened, a silent dilemma clear on his face. He gathered his own courage, squaring his shoulders a bit and looking at you again. "I'm sorry."

You felt dazed, electricity in the air around you, the world officially tilted on its axis to you. "What?" You accentuated snippier than you intended.

"You were collateral. Nothing that you did deserved what happened to you. Makes sense that you did what you did, you weren't the problem." He explained, shoulders slumped again. "I was behind what I did, at the end of the day; Ei just told me to do it. I'm sorry for being part of the reason you couldn't bounce back. I know if the situation were different, I'd leave you alone."

People kept saying that to you these days, that nothing that happened was because you deserved it. Maybe you never quite got the picture until Kuni said something along the lines of it. You never thought that him apologizing to you would garner the oddest reaction out of you.

Because why was it sexy..? Stop.

"And," He sighed, grabbing your attention lightspeed again. "I would consider liking you more if this all didn't happen. You're alright."

His admission of everything was catching you off guard left and right. You had no idea what to feel with the prominent knot in your stomach. "Do you like me?" "(Y/N), I don't want to—"

"I'm alright, in your words, but do you like me?" Your tone solidified with each word slowly jutting out, assertiveness hardening your composure. "Tell me. Look at me and tell me."

The uncertainly stretched on for what was practically indefinitely. He held his breath, as did you, waiting for his response. Your heart was ruthless against you, beating against your body. He sized you up, seeking an answer for himself.

"...Yeah?" He admitted, voice barely audible as he tried to find his own words. But everything he did think of was so unlike him, out of his personal way of handling things like this. "Yeah. I do."

You blinked, both of your eye contact filling a certain, more romantic space that neither of you even thought was there before today. But the more you realized it, the more you realized that maybe the sexual tension was always there.

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YOU ARE on your way to being one of the hottest streamer in your nation at the moment, racking a monthly average of 10 million viewers, but something specific bothers you about it. you know that a lot of people hate you, but there's this one account. one account that's been following you since the early days of your career. they leave a flood of rude comments in your stream, your moderators banned each account they made, but they keep making more. you are at the end of your tether. but you are yet to find out that this persistent cockroach is none other than your friend's friend (and the only other streamer that's bigger than you), scaramouche.

taglist ♡ @thystarsshine @veekoko @gumickajolli @simonisferal @kamiboo

@justpeachyteastea @feiherp @pinkismyfavcolor @aether-darling @kunisnaomi

@keiiqq @mine-lu @featuredtofu @danhenglovebot @k4zushi

@kyon-cherri @b4tm4nn @iiinaurate @quacking-simp @auroratumbles

@kookiibun @ulquiorraswife @amvpk01 @simplysm1le @h3xi2g0n3

@alatusorrow @scaranthropy @mellowberrie @magica-ren @vernith

@kabukipookie @bananasquash @suqarlaced @dellalyra @lightyagamifan

@yourfavoritefreakyhan @heartsforseo @yomishen @pwushizz @swivy123

@strxwberryfetish @ibyobi @ashfrommars4 @chemiru @ainnofinway

@agaygothicmushroom @levianamor @dragontammerz @wth121 @lylovw

@morgyyyyyyy @lovemari @suniika @littlesliceofcheese @yumejo89

@liuaneee @franaby @tiddieshakeshownu @mimi3lover @kavineyah

@kittywagun (bold users means i'm having trouble tagging you)

[ashxketchum]

They uploaded the video where Agumon, Gabumon, Veemon and Wormon will call out names of fans and look! We get a glimpse at Taichi, Yamato, Daisuke and Ken's rooms!

You know what this means? It's time for a certified Ayushi breakdown 🫡

There is so much blue in Taichi's room hahaha (taiyama win!), the soccer magazines + jump manga reference is so on point. And he has so many bags! Taichi why do you need so many backpacks, one for every outfit? 😆 THE DUMBBELLS THO my boy is working out to maintain that body we got a glimpse of in Tri 😌 The whistle hanging on the wall is also a nice touch, is it Hikari's whistle from when they were kids? 🥹 Or even if it's not, I'd like to imagine a scenario where Taichi helps Hikari with her kindergarten schoolwork occasionally by coaching football to the little kids in his free time! Can you imagine him running around with little kids who are about as tall as the football itself 🤣 I tried to zoom in to figure out what the magazine on his desk is for, and I could make out the word Nakano, so maybe it's just something he picked up on his way home (maybe he lives around Nakano?) since it looks slightly crumpled too, like it was shoved in his bag in a rush. His phone (and is that a wallet?) feel pretty standard. He is the only one who doesn't have a lamp on his desk + has some kind of reminder post-its stuck to his desktop, maybe he's not so good with passwords? Koushiro probably always lectures him about this every time he visits.

Now let's talk about Yamato, FIRST OF ALL I WILL SCREAM ABOUT THE KOD TSHIRT! HE STILL WEARS IT! I'M CRYING RIGHT NOW!!! And then his guitars because I swear I did a one hour deep dive trying to figure out the brand and model and I think they're both Fender (an expensive brand I would say) which once again makes me wonder how much money does the TakaIshi family has for their sons to have expensive, bikes, cars and guitars. TO TOP IT OFF Yamato is definitely an Apple bitch too like look at that monitor and keyboard, that's Mac and his phone is very clearly Iphone. Now his room follows a very warm, muted tones of black and brown. We can spot some music related magazines on his shelf and a big, plain tote bag on the ground (see Taichi one big bag should be enough 🤣) which looks like something he uses for grocery shopping. Yamato is the only one who doesn't have a wheelie computer chair, but rather a wooden one. Now whether he did this to follow the aesthetic of the room (highly likely) or because he doesn't actually spend a lot of time in this space is something we can all think about. He has a framed portrait or photo(?) up on the wall and I did consider him more of a framed art guy over a poster guy always so this is good to see too. Also nice to note that on his desk, he has THE HARMONICA 😭 And the same Jump issue that Taichi has on his shelf! His room is honestly a lot like how I imagined it to be in terms of the furniture and colours so I'm very happy with this sneak peek!

I am not qualified to comment on Daisuke and Ken's rooms, so will leave that to 02 fans!

[wispscribbles]

hi i just discovered your beautiful art so i obviously needed to scroll down your whole blog to catch up on everything you posted haha

i just wanted to say that i got way too emotional after reading that post of yours regarding mw3 and your mental health… on one hand i’m so sorry that you felt that way, but on the other i feel it with my whole heart

ghoap content especially for me helped me these past few months with my mental health in ways i would never have expected, it was my solace and inspiration, i started working out too and got back into drawing, got a lot better at it as well!

but unfortunately i get way too fixated on fictional stuff and there comes a time that my brain switches up and connects the things i liked and comforted me with things that make me extremely uncomfortable and stressed out, especially if i fall down a fandom rabbit hole that i would never have searched up, beacuse i know myself, i know my limits and triggers but i feel like i’m not a part of the fandom if i don’t like and interact with every single headcanon, art and ship

these past days i was really down because of that, and the things i read (why did i do that???) and now when i think of ghoap i think of that stuff and im scared that i alienated myself from the one thing that made me happy

but discovering your art and with that your post reminded me that im not alone in these feelings, even if it’s not the same exactly, and i wanted to thank you, for sharing your thoughts that time i guess haha <33

((sorry for rambling))

Long reply under 'keep reading' !! CW: talk of triggers and MCD

Always feel free to ramble my way!!! How nice you could find some comfort in my art and ghoap stuff. Especially in my mw3 post. I've been considering deleting it a few times, but hearing it maybe helped to read in some way makes me happy I left it up.

I get where you're coming from - I very much use these fictional characters as a safe space, but ppl view them very differently. There's room for it all, "don't like, don't interact" is very much a policy I agree with. It's important to mute words and be aware of your own triggers as you browse stuff in this fandom, because there's such a wide variety of stuff out there. You do NOT have to interact and agree with every thought people have on this ship, that's impossible and super stressful. There's plenty of stuff and headcanons I don't vibe with. There are no 'requirements' that you have to meet in order to enjoy fiction.

It's part of why I enjoy ghoap - that their dynamic resonates and has sparked so much creativity and outlets for so many - but it also means there's gonna be a lot of stuff u don't necessarily agree with or feel comfortable with. For example, a lot of folks use the MCD in mw3 as a way to explore grief, which I think is really cool, but on a bad day that could potentially get my brain in a bad headspace, so I only check out that art and those fics when I feel okay. There's also a bunch of stuff I'd never want to interact with, and that’s fine !!

I'm personally quite vanilla and a sucker for exploring the softer, more domestic aspects of these characters. It's what brings me joy. I know there are parts of this fandom who don’t vibe with what I make at all, and would call it untrue to the characters. Some creators enjoy exploring the more violent or toxic sides to the source material. That's just how it is, we all need different things from fiction. As long as we're capable of chilling in our respective sandboxes, then all's good.

But if you're like me, and enjoy the softer things, then definitely be aware and careful while exploring this ship and fandom. I've seen takes on these characters that are so far removed from how I view them, that they're basically the complete opposite, and it can leave a very bad taste, especially if you're the type to hinge your safe space on fiction.

Just... be mindful of yourself and your potential triggers, be respectful and don't interact with things that make you uncomfortable to the point of feeling unsafe. Shape your own online experience to your best ability.

Hope you're doing okay and still find joy in ghoap <3

[zvtara-was-never-canon]

There is 58 years between the first plane flight, and a human going to space.

Technological advancements happen very quickly, so yeah that argument is mute. Even if you believe Santos Dumant was the first person to do it, that's still 63 years between his flight and a human going to space.

Also I'm not sure in which universe is democracy a widely American concept.

Even before Ancient Greece in the Vajjika Republic in 6th century bce India is widely considered to be the first example of a democratic Republic.

Also democracy is literally only in Republic City, which didn't have real democracy until the end of Book 1, and the earth kingdom who was suffering under a bad case of fascism. And Queen Hou-Ting, what ever godamm name was, sucked dick and was a terrible ruler.

The water tribes kept their chiefs, they just get to vote on it. The northern water tribe chiefdom is hereditary. The fire nation kept their firelord

Korra did not spread democracy everywhere, unlike where you claim they forced it.

Poor earth kingdom citizens, they must miss being a selfish queen who never did anything to help them, and let theives go wild, and then the facist dictator, who put people into concentration camps.

In HISTORY leaps in technology have happened fast. In a STORY you need to be careful not to make the whole thing feel like it's set in a different universe - and when we go from rudimentary industrialization, some of which is openly treated as a PROBLEM by the original's shows narrative because nature's worth and it's key role in keeping balance are a central theme in several episodes, all the way to Ford 1s everywhere, big ass factories that would obviously cause a lot of polution, lightningbending going from rare to something common that is used to give everyone electricity, all because the writers wanted to change the aesthetic from Meiji Era Japan to Prohibition Era New York, I'm gonna say that shit went a bit too far.

I didn't say americans invented democracy, I'm saying it's very common for american writers to push their own way of life as the only correct one, because there's literally over a century of the government spreading propaganda about "The american dream" and "the american way of life" to EVERYONE, including people in the USA, where the writers were raised - which is why the city that is supposed to represent the all four nations suddenly goes from "Very obviously east asian" to "Very obviously USA stuff that was never present in the old show." The character of Korra isn't running around saying "The US is inherently better", but the show very much is by making the symbol of balance and harmony so PAINFULLY american.

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not saying Bryke or anyone involved in the making of Korra was actively trying to make propaganda, they were just influenced by it and repeated some of it without even realizing it - and so did you with the bizarre leap in logic of "If you criticize the way americans, knowingly and unknowingly, tend to push their way of life as the default/superior one in stories, that means you think the fascist villain had a point/is not that bad"

If you like Korra as a show, including the whole concept of Republic City, that's fine. It's none of my business. But as someone who literally had to study American propaganda pieces and the long lasting influence it had in media, there is NOTHING you or anyone can say to me that will convince me that is not a reflex of propaganda that breaks the world-building that had been very coherent and consistent in the previous show. Either deal with that, or block the tags/my blog.

[canadachildvol2]

Wish rewrite ✨ Extra details

As I mentioned in the final part of my "Wish" rewrite, I was toying with the idea of creating a separate post that covers additional details and character descriptions that I couldn't organically include in the summaries. After spending some time away (my brain was pretty fried after all the planning and plotting of that rewrite lol), I eventually decided to go forward with that idea. So here it is :)

Below the cut are details concerning the key characters and the plot itself, including a few worldbuilding tidbits. I have also added some of my concept art (one of which I already showed in the rewrite, but I wanted to share again). <3

And because they asked me to, I'm tagging @signed-sapphire

CHARACTER DETAILS

Asha: The main protagonist of the story. Levelheaded, composed, a touch cynical; a realist. She is prone to being very blunt and not considering how this harsh honesty can hurt others before speaking. Despite this, at her core, she's a trustworthy and compassionate individual who cares a lot about her family, friends, and Rosas as a whole.

After being let down again and again throughout her life (her father's death when she was 12, no one in her family having their wishes granted, seeing the kingdom figuratively crumble bit by bit because of how exhausted and troublingly passive many citizens are, etc.), she eventually stopped being hopeful and always focuses on realistic outcomes and worst-case scenarios.

"[Papa] always said that hope gives you strength, but for me it brought so much pain. So by expecting and accepting the worst, it hurts less when the inevitable happens."

When it comes to Star, she is at first exasperated by his energetic and overly curious personality. However, during their time helping people with their wishes, she softens up to him and sees his good heart. Moreover, his ambitiousness and optimism rubs off on her and she gradually starts to feel bright and - more importantly - hopeful for the first time in years.

She works as a tour guide for visitors and potential new residents. While not a fan of the job, it "pays well" as she says to Dahlia at one point. In her spare time, she likes to read and draw. She is also a talented dancer, but she often keeps this skill under wraps (courtesy of her reserved nature).

~ I took some inspiration from Jane's character and arc in "Return to Neverland," but there are shades of Tiana and Raya present as well. Regardless, I really wanted this version of Asha to stand out from past Disney heroines. ~

Star: The deuteragonist of the story. Energetic, inquisitive, peppy, and (at first) doesn’t have much sense of personal space. He can be very easily distracted, but when things get serious, he knows to focus on what's important. He is an overall affable person who is eager to experience new things and make friends.

He is a young star who has reached the point where he is ready to advance into a proper wishing star. By helping Asha make her wish come true, he will accomplish that, so he is very much determined to make it happen. However, he finds himself conflicted when he grows fond of humans and their way of life, as well as falling in love with Asha. He wants more than anything to help her save Rosas and become a wishing star, but that will mean he'll have to leave her when the job is done.

He is mute and only communicates through body language and images created with his star dust. The sole exception to this is in the "At All Costs" scene when he used his magic to allow Asha to essentially hear his thoughts via human speech. This is temporary and only lasts a few minutes. Afterwards, he goes back to being mute.

"His fingers touch her lips, then his, then he runs them along her ears leaving a trail of star dust. Before she can question what he did, she hears a deep, soft voice: “Asha.” It’s him! It’s Star! “You can…?” “Not for long."

His powers include levitation, shape-shifting, making things grow, and changing the colours of flowers and other objects he sees. While he cannot actually grant wishes with his magic, he can inspire others and spread hope with it. In this sense, he is indirectly granting them by providing the tools others need to make them come true on their own. Animals are also drawn to him.

Magnifico: The current king of Rosas and the main villain of the story. A cunning and charismatic sorcerer whose knowledge of wish granting magic was passed down from the royals before him. When 18-year-olds and new residents approach him to give their wishes, he presents himself as a kind man. In reality, he is apathetic to his subjects' well-being and only cares about maintaining absolute control.

While this need to preserve his authority stems from having a bit of a God complex, it is also because he does not want to be the king responsible for a great empire's destruction.

The only person he genuinely cares about is Amaya, with whom he is madly in love. He is the more emotional of the two, in that he is quick to succumb to frustration in moments of stress and/or anger. However, he can just as easily be calmed down by his wife, be it through words of encouragement or simply a gentle hand on his shoulder.

Amaya: The current queen of Rosas and the other villain of the story. Even-tempered, regal, and equally as cunning as Magnifico. While not a magic-user like him, she is just as powerful due to her intelligence and tactful nature. She is just as in love with her husband as he is with her.

She is the calm to his storm. The left brain to his right brain. She can pull him back from his stressful outbursts and stop him from potentially ruining his "benevolent king" facade by keeping him grounded and focused on the present. Truth be told, Magnifico wouldn't be nearly as mighty or as beloved without her there to help him and provide new ideas to carry out his plans.

Dahlia: Asha's best friend and a young baker. Cheerful, idealistic, and tends to stumble over her words when excited or stressed (a nod to Doc from “Snow White” along with her character design). She works in her family's bakery, but dreams of one day becoming the castle baker. As such, she thinks her work needs to be perfect to get that position, so she has a tendency to slip into a perfectionist mindset when it comes to her baking. Despite others' insistence that her work is already amazing, she is determined to be even better.

Like the rest of Rosas, she thinks highly of the king and queen. While this adoration makes her initially distrustful of Asha's innocence when she was accused of destroying the wishes, she ultimately sides with her.

~ Design note: in this version, her ruby dress leans more towards a reddish-violet shade; basically something that contains a bit of purple. This ensures that the warm colour palette of Asha's outfit - mainly the orange part - makes her stand out from the rest of Rosas, as well as foreshadows Dahlia's future internal conflict of not knowing whether to side with Asha (red/warm) or the king and queen she adores (the purple colour that dominates Rosas, along with blue and grey). ~

Sakina: Asha's mother. She is a farmer who mainly grows fruit and also does a bit of weaving on the side. She is a kind and hardworking woman, but can also be stern when necessary. She and her husband used to work together as farmers, but since his death, she's been doing most of it herself (Asha often helps whenever she can). As such, she has become visibly exhausted, but refuses to admit it and doesn't let it get in the way of raising her daughter.

Her wish was to be fearless. She made this come true on her own in a roundabout way by being the first to stand up for Asha to the king when she was accused of destroying the wishes. While more "brave" than "fearless," such an act still took serious guts.

Sabino: Asha's grandfather and the father of Asha's late dad. He is a devoted family man with a creative mind and optimistic attitude. Like the rest of Rosas, he thinks highly of the king and queen and continues to hold out hope that his wish will be granted one day despite being repeatedly let down. In spite of this adoration of the royals, he loves his family first and foremost.

He worked for many years as a blacksmith, but eventually retired once it was clear that he was too old for the job. While skillful in this occupation, his lifelong passion has been painting, which he spent a lot of time doing following his retirement. He also assists Sakina in her farming any way he can, though his old age has taken a toll on how often he does this.

His wish was to be able to bring his paintings to life.

~ Design note: like Dahlia, the colour scheme of his outfit needs to be tweaked a little to match the purple/blue/grey palette of Rosas, showing his loyalty to the royals and to once again ensure that Asha's palette stands out. ~

Simon: An acquaintance of Asha's. Three years older than her. He works multiple jobs in the hope that his hard work will be noticed by the king and queen and they will grant his wish. As such, he is usually very tired; more than most older adults in Rosas even. While a decent man at his core, he is also prone to skepticism and his devotion to the royals often clouds his judgement.

It's not uncommon for his insecurities to take control and drive him to do some questionable things. This is what caused him to rat out Asha to Magnifico and Amaya. However, he feels genuine remorse afterwards and does what he can to make up for his mistakes.

His wish was to be a brave and honourable knight. Also, like in the movie, his tiredness and general design is a nod to Sleepy from "Snow White."

Asha’s father: I just found out his name is Tomás, so... Tomás was Asha's father and Sakina's husband. He died from an illness when Asha was 12 years old. He used to work as a blacksmith with Sabino, but after marrying Sakina, he decided to become a farmer like her.

He was a good man; very funny and an extrovert. He was also a doting father and used to tell Asha to look to the stars whenever she feels lost. His last birthday gift to her before his death was a silver bracelet with star designs engraved on it. Asha cherishes it very much and wears it every day.

Dario: A good friend of Asha's. He is five years older than her. Friendly, a little absentminded, and a bit of a goofball (a nod to Dopey from “Snow White” along with his character design). He and Asha have a sibling-like relationship, with her being a down-to-Earth force that keeps his head out of the clouds. In fact, you can sum-up their rapport with this bit of dialogue from 'The Wizard of Oz': "But someday they're going to erect a statue to me in this town, and-" "Well, don't start posing for it now."

His wish was to be super intelligent. The main reason why he wants this is so that he can become a great inventor. Through Star’s influence shortly after his arrival at Rosas, and with additional encouragement from Asha, Dario realizes that he just needs to apply himself and his preexisting strengths; those being his creativity and perseverance.

Bazeema: Another good friend of Asha's. She is one year older than her and gave her wish to Magnifico very recently. A sweet-natured young lady who doesn't have a mean bone in her body. Very shy and is rarely seen without blushing cheeks (a nod to Bashful from “Snow White” along with her character design). She works as a seamstress and shows a lot of promise as a dressmaker.

Her wish was to have a brilliant and boundless imagination. She already had great talent in sewing and could create beautiful outfits, but only in accordance with what other people want. She finds it hard to come up with her own ideas. However, with Asha and Star's help, she learns that she can find inspiration for new designs from those around her. She gradually comes out of her shell and this leads to her conceiving more original ideas.

~ Design note: the yellow portions of her outfit will need to either be made less warm or be changed altogether so that Asha's outfit (i.e. the orange part of her dress) can stand out. ~

STORY DETAILS

- Hal, Gabo, and Safi are present in this version, but they have smaller roles. That said, they each have a part in the “Montage” song and they are among the townsfolk that side with Asha after she was accused of destroying the wishes. Like their movie counterparts, they are based on Happy, Grumpy, and Sneezy respectively. Additionally, they are all either 18 or over 18, like Simon, Dario, and Bazeema.

- Asha has a total of three outfits throughout the story; technically five if you count two other variations of her main outfit. 1) Her main dress. 2) Main dress with a blanket wrapped around her, which she wears at one point during the “Montage” song sequence where she and Star are bonding while sitting outside at night. 3) Main dress decorated with star dust during “At All Costs.” 4) The dress she wears after the time-skip near the end. 5) The dress she wears when she and Star reunite (the one Bazeema made for her).

- Celestial star beings age similarly to humans, but they live much longer. Furthermore, there are three stages in their life cycle: baby star (akin to Star in the movie), young star (where this version of Star is at most of the story), then full wishing star (where Star ends up).

- There are some references to Disney's past movies sprinkled throughout this version, but they would be much more subtle than how they are in the movie. Some would be blink-and-you'll-miss-it, others are more visual, whether it be a character's design or a shot composition (ex. when an awestruck Asha is wandering through the palace for the first time, I envision a moment where she looks at her reflection in the mirrors adorning the walls in such a way that's akin to Belle looking at her reflection in the cracked mirror in the West Wing).

- Much like how Star's personality and actions have an influence on Asha, her personality and actions have an influence on him. Not only does he learn to slow down and think things through, but as the story goes on, his movements become less erratic. He's still a ball of energy and demonstrates this when he's happy or excited, but he's a lot more composed by the end than he was when he first entered the story.

- Not sure if it would be mentioned at all during the story, but Tomás' wish was for his future child (he made this wish at age 18 before he and Sakina had Asha) to shine bright. He may not have lived to see it, but it did end up coming true.

- The wish granting era has been ongoing for over 200 years. Evidently there is no one left alive who truly remembers what Rosas was like before the wish system was established.

- Star's subsequent once-a-month visits are seven days long.

- Asha experiences two types of guilt: 1) the fact that despite her dad repeatedly reminding her of how important hope is, she wound up becoming someone who doesn't have any hope, and 2) her job as a tour guide means that she was responsible for luring several people into living in Rosas, thus trapping them in this exhaustive and cult-like lifestyle.

- Star's magic comes naturally. The magic Magnifico and the royals before him used basically comes from alchemy (potions, various tools and apparatuses, etc.). And for the record, this does not imply that alchemy-based magic is bad (except for the destroying wishes part). Magnifico and the royals before him simply used it for malicious purposes.

- The rules of Star's magic are more in-line with those of the three fairies from "Sleeping Beauty." Specifically, how his magic is mainly used to bring joy to people rather than cause pain. That said, when he's pissed off (like when Magnifico hurts Asha or even tries to hurt her), he can use his magic to attack, but it's not as strong in that department as Magnifico's magic is.

- After the time-skip, Rosas' colour palette is much more vibrant. It is no longer confined to primarily blues, purples, and greys.

Rewrite / "At All Costs" sequence / Asha & Star Character Tropes

[velvetvexations]

You mean well when you say it and I generally agree with your points but I would like to suggest trying to replace words like “insane,” “crazy,” and “delusional” in your vocabulary? It may alienate some of your neurodivergents/mentally ill/disabled followers. Some examples might be “ridiculous,” “wild,” “nonsensical,” “irrational,” and “ludicrous” depending on context?

I really appreciate you coming to me about this. Let's talk about it.

I have been deliberately avoiding delusional since getting an anon about it, and I do agree that's fair. I might have slipped up and let it get in at some point since then, but it's been on my mind when I formulate sentences lately.

I am myself, however, very mentally ill, which I talk a lot about when I go into the inherent irrationality behind a lot of NPD that reaches a point where I do really relate to the idea of being "crazy" in the way it's traditionally imagined, because that's exactly what it feels like when I'm having a panic attack over something that could only possibly make sense to me and would be profoundly illogical and completely out of proportion to others.

I also find meaning in using certain terms in a way that isn't necessarily purely clinical - for instance, there's a game called Dread Delusion I'd like very much, and as someone who is profoundly delusional I feel that's a lovely title that probably has good thematic relevance even if it it's a bit profane. Compare that to the movie Schizoid, or the "Psychos" in Borderlands, which are just ableist....although I have a weird relationship with Borderlands Psychos we don't need to get into. Regardless, saying that sounds weird. I'm not trying to invent the concept of artistic ableism vs. obscene ableism, all I mean to say is that I think there's at least some room to relax our standards just a bit in some contexts.

But, of course, casually using words like "crazy" to describe something egregious that should be booed is certainly pointed and reinforces the idea that "crazy" is a bad thing. I wonder, though, if "crazy" and "insane" might not be able to reach the same status as "dumb", which originally referred to muteness but is now considered acceptable. It's not that, as is the case with the origin of "dumb", the meanings are forgotten, but that I'm unsure if those casual uses are really incompatible with a world that destigmatizes neurodivergencey.

It can also be difficult sometimes because I have a lot of words I repeat a lot. I always feel like the same very specific words come to me over and over, and I'm actually really insecure about that.

But first and foremost my primary concern is this: you say these words could alienate some of Velvet Nation, but I'd like, if you'd be so kind, to say so if you personally (and any others who would like to comment) would find it uncomfortable if I didn't make further efforts to go around particular words. I want you and everyone else who may be in the same boat to view me and my space as safe. and that's what's most important to me.

[kakusu-shipping]

4, 5, and 6 for the agere asks for.... all of your BNHA regressors? :D

That's... a few too many characters for me to answer all in one ask, so let's limit it to just The League sense they all go together well

minus a Dabi icon because I can't find flags for any of my headcanons for them

Asks from Here

4. Does your regressed f/o collect things? If so, what is it and how much do you enable it?

I'll enable my League babies in anything and everything, first of all. Second, the only one of the four who actively collects things is probably Himiko. She's a bit of a hoarder of anything she deems cute and tends to just pick things up and stuff them in her pockets.

Not an active collection he does on his own but Tomura has more Dog stuffies than much anything else, though he does also have Pokemon and Minecraft ones his older self has placed on shelves he can't reach because they are Mint Condition back at AFO's manor. He use to get pretty fussy about that some times, but it's become less of a problem sense moving to the Bar.

Jin and Dabi don't collect anything, nor do either of them have much that could be considered a collection (or much at all)

5. Does your regressed f/o have any gear that they want really bad? If so, what is it?

Tomura and Himiko both get everything they want without question, so neither of them have anything they really really want at the moment and are rather satisfied with their little gear at the moment.

Jin is constantly back and forth about wanting a pacifier. He's worried he'll chew right through it and ruin it, but it'd make it harder to talk making the other him less likely to say something he doesn't agree with (tantrum triggering when they fight), but also he'd have to take off or at least lift his mask to put it in his mouth which can easily trigger an even bigger meltdown than infighting does, but also also he sees his Big Sister Himiko and Baby Brother Tomura each with want and his tiny baby heart is just so over come with jealously he can't contain it. If I got him one, I'm almost sure it'd fix the whole thing, but just cause another problem, so I'm waiting patiently for him to decide himself what he wants.

Dabi doesn't have any little gear and refuses any I've tried to gift to them. They try very hard to push their regression down and ignore it, and they don't want me or anyone else in the League to be apart of it. I try to give them space, but I have hidden a few of little Dabi's favorite snacks around their room, along with some sparklers to play with. They seem content enough with that for now.

6. What is your favorite thing in your regressed f/o’s playroom?

For Tomura it was back at the Mansion, he had a crib with a mobile on it, it was the only thing his father had ever contributed to his Regression space, so of course it was his favorite. It played a lullaby as it spun I'd never heard before, and always put Tomura right to sleep. I wonder if it's still there...

Himiko has a lot of toys, most of which she's stolen from dollar stores and gas stations, but one Jin got her; A 4ft tall Valentine's day Teddy bear. It's big and soft baby pink holding a big red heart. I ended up cutting the heart free from the bear's stomach so now Himiko can wiggle herself behind it and sleep in the bear's arms. It's very cute <3

Jin doesn't have playroom per say, he doesn't have a lot of gear either. Rather than sit still somewhere with toys and games he'd rather follow me, Magne, or Himiko around while regressed. Though out of the few things I've seen him get attached to I think my favorite is the baby blanket Himiko got for him. It USE to be soft baby blue but he won't let me wash it at all and carried it everywhere with him, cries into it, uses it to cover his face, and sleeps with it, so it's gotten pretty grimy and is more of a muted color now. Himiko thinks it's gross now and won't touch it, but I've convinced her not to comment on it, sense if she doesn't like it, Jin is likely to throw it away... and then regret it.

Dabi, much like Jin, doesn't have a little space or many little items. Usually when they regress they lock themselves away in their room and don't come back out until they come out of it, so I don't know what their little space looks like, or anything they might comfort themselves with... I hope they're okay in there...

[pocket-size-cthulhu]

The Internet is getting worse every day and i hate it. I'd rather go out and have friendships with people in real life. With people i can see and hug and eat with.

But spaces to do that are dwindling and people i can enjoy spending time around often prefer to spend time together online.

If i didn't have to work so much (40hrs/week is a lot!) for my living, I'd build and maintain social sites for fun. I think it would be cool and also it would feel good to facilitate a nice space for people. I feel like there are plenty of nerds who feel the same.

But i do have to work so much, which means if I'm putting my brain to work i want to be paid for it because the amount i can output ever week is limited and after 40 hours I'm almost completely spent. And i have a family and friends and hobbies and stuff i also want to give attention and energy to.

I wish we didn't have to work so much. Maybe if i didn't work so much I'd have more energy to bear the anxiety i experience when i go into social situations (and the more i bear that anxiety the less intense it becomes, so i can do it more). If i didn't work so much maybe i wouldn't feel like my life is nearly spent when I'm not even 30 yet. Maybe i could have meaningful connections, do normal 20s things, develop skills and have hobbies. Maybe i could overcome my fears and hangups. Maybe i could learn to do some good in my community, put down roots and learn from people who are older than me who have lived fulfilled lives. Maybe i could lend more of my time to helping my neighbors.

I really want to be involved. I believe in strong communities, i believe that fulfillment can come in any and every stage of life, i believe in doing things that are nice for the sake of it, i believe that given the opportunity people would build beautiful and useful things for free. But we don't have time or energy for any of that. Because we're working.

And what can you do about that? Some people at my work have pushed for a 4-day workweek but execs aren't willing to consider it - and why?? It would literally be better for everyone. Everyone in the department i left just over a year ago is burned all the way out. What right does work have to ruin your mental health? Why do people find grind culture so alluring?

The other day someone at my work got recognized for excellence in their role. Someone praised them for working even while they were sick, to the point that they were on a call and muting themselves to throw up, then unmuting to continue the call. That's not typical at my workplace at all, nor is it expected thank goodness, but the fact that they were even praising that disgusted me. They should have ordered her to get offline and go throw up in peace until she felt better. How can you see that as anything but dystopic? Someone's putting work above her literal health and that's not ok at all.

Exponential growth is just so unnatural. Like it's cool if you have a big market and you grow a lot for a while. But why do you need to be growing year over year? Is it not enough to maintain? People talk about plateauing like it's a bad thing, but if you've got a good thing going, really genuinely why do you have to look for ways to Make More Money With It? Can't you find fulfillment in the fact that you've provided a service people like and are using?

Like if you were the CEO of Twitter, that would suck for a lot of reasons, but it would also be nice knowing you provided a platform where lots of people learn new perspectives, get news quickly and form communities that sometimes even go on to become real life friends. That's super cool. Why is business always about profit and never about people primarily?

It's Friday. It's been a long week. Instagram just showed me ads between someone's posts that i was scrolling through - they've never done that before. I'm just tired of it all. The counterfeit world in my pocket makes it harder to go engage with the actual world outside my own 4 walls. Ugh.

[amberduan-ual]

Making It Workshop #5 (19/5/23)

Geoff Granfield's guest lecture was really fantastic and personally interesting to me since I'm interested in both editorial and book illustration work.

I liked that Geoff showed a lot of his process work and talked about how he works traditionally. I think most editorial illustrators now work digitally, so it's cool to see that traditional chalk pastel still works for him. His illustration style is so clean and sharp that it's hard to imagine that he uses chalk pastel, so I think it's really impressive that he chooses to work with the medium.

I think Geoff's style is really cool because it's quite stylized and atmospheric. He cited film noir as a major influence on his work, and I can definitely see the same quality of muted emotion and dramatic framing. His illustrations are really intelligently composed, with certain elements taking up the majority of the frame or others becoming trapped/constrained to convey a certain message.

It was interesting to see Geoff's book illustration in addition to his editorial work. I don't see many novels these days being published with interior illustrations, so it's really cool to see how Geoff approaches this type of work. I found it amazing that he gets to propose where the illustrations will go in the book, and that he has to plan out the spacing of them as well.

I noticed that Geoff tends to sketch out thumbnails of his work over and over again, with minor changes to composition and proportions of elements on the page. He's clearly experimenting with the visual impact of different choices, and I found this kind of process really appealing. He's very logically coming to the best conclusion through trial and error, thinking through making.

Geoff talked about his visual dictionary, which is a sort of reference tool that collects visual language interpretations of different words. His example was the word "divide" which can be visualized as two pieces being split in half, but also can be conveyed with a fence or border. One of my professors at Pratt, Richard Borge, is also an editorial illustrator and mentioned a similar working process and how helpful it can be, so I'm definitely interested in starting a similar reference tool of my own now.

Geoff brought up two themes in his lecture that I found deeply important. He mentioned that as illustrators, we have the ability to create narrative and meaning in art, which is might be one of the only ways we can resist AI. I found myself thinking about this a lot as he spoke, and came to the conviction that there is no way AI will ever completely replace human art. Geoff's art is a really great example of why.

His illustration style itself may not be especially unique, but his unique way of visual thinking can't be replicated. In this editorial on the Kinder transport, the railroad tracks very subtly form the swastika symbol. Geoff talked about how this was necessary because powerful hate symbols need to be treated with sensitivity, especially when being portrayed in media. An AI would never be able to come to this same illustrative result, no matter how many pieces of art it scrapes. This is because a human mind had to consider the context of the subject and symbol, and think about how the composition could communicate both in a respectful way.

Artists have always been challenged by advancing technology to bring something to the table that machines cannot. The invention of cameras sparked the Impressionist movement, directly countering realism and embracing human emotion in art. I think the rise in AI image generation will force us as illustrators to make more intelligent choices in our art, because AI will only become better at replicating aesthetic styles with time.

[diseurdeverite]

"Do I really have to leave?"

The short answer is yes, the long answer is...

Hearing your voice constantly puts me on edge. That's part of the reason I've been so stressed lately. I have been trying not to forget why I'm angry or put my needs second. I could say yes, you can stay here, but it would do nothing good for either of us.

After we broke up, you refused to give me space. You put your emotions on me constantly even though that wasn't my job anymore, and it never should have been. I've been forced to put my life on mute, on hold for months because of you. I shouldn't have to ask your permission for anything, let alone seeing my partner and friends. You've made me feel like I've had to, sending me nasty messages when I had him over one night when I was having a breakdown about the fact that I had to live with you and it was driving me insane. So, yeah, sorry for not asking permission.

I don't want you to leave Wilmington, I want you to live here if that's what will be best for you. When you said you were moving back to Illinois, it hurt a lot. I knew that's something you've never wanted to consider. But it's not my problem. It's clear you don't want to look for roommates you don't know, but you haven't made any effort to connect with communities in Wilmington within which you could reach out and have thus relied on me and my personal friend groups for your only source of interaction. Now that they want nothing to do with you, and I'm finally putting myself first, you feel as though you have no one in the area. But again, that's not my problem.

I am coming to understand that you never really considered my emotional wellbeing in the decisions you made, often not even asking me or just assuming I would be okay with things like: 1) you talking to your abusive ex and then when asked in what context, telling me you might go visit and potentially fuck them, and 2) downloading tinder and talking to people before we were open and without my consent. I'm also extremely angry that you changed up your story to say I cheated on you when I was open with you from the start. You pointed out that there were months in which "I hadn't told you about it," but those months were as friends - and when things changed, I let you know immediately. I told you I wanted to see him in a romantic sense, I told you we held hands, I told you we kissed. I was honest.

Despite all the hurt and all the anger, I still care about you a lot, and I know this is hurting you just as bad as they are hurting me. If you were hurt greatly the past year in any way by my actions, I am sorry. I'm not running away from the grief and the trove of conflicting feelings this is causing me, but I am trying to keep myself from making poor decisions for your sake, and I also can't just let you stay in my life when there's so much pain I'm experiencing from your actions. You admitted yourself that you were selfish. I'm finally understanding just how selfish you were, in our relationship.

[thirtheenprimes]

I've read all my old fanfiction and realized it was a chopping mechanism; I diary and a wish list. All the tropes I honed, the characters I put through blenders, and the batshit unrelated takes I pulled out of my ass and expanded upon and got attached to were actually subconscious projections of all that I was, am, and wanted to be without realizing.

Yeah, these two characters are literal soul mates but they don't kiss or marry or anything like that. Their love is transcendent and they are the most important people to each other even though they would never even consider sex or whatever marriage even means. Not that I'm aroace or anything.

Oh, I don't know why I always make this character absorb that uber-important semi-conscious artifact and thus get constantly overwhelmed by his sensory input from sound, sight, touch, and a dozen others his mortal form wasn't built to interpret. Also there's no particular reason I always write him obsessed with space and wanting to learn more and info dumping about this subject he's taken a very special interest in whenever he can. No, no, I've never considered that I am autistic, what do you mean?

Statistically, there is absolutely no reason why the majority of the perspectives I write from are boys/men. Honestly, I don't think there is any difference mentally between the way a boy or a girl would experience these events or internally narrarate them, so it doesn't matter. Oh, yeah, I have noticed an increase in characters I'm writing that don't notice gender differences or even understand gender at all. What's nonbinary, is that computer programming?

Yeah, I know I'm more of a fantasy fan, but robots man. Robots, that, like, are logical and understand human emotions but are detached from that messy business. Yeah... robots.

I guess now that you mention it, attachment and trust issues do take a major role in most of my stories. My childhood? Oh, yeah, I don't really think about that a lot. Honestly, can't even remember most of it. Ha ha, funny, right?

No I don't think my weird interests in masks means anything. Bionicles and knights and Majora are all just really cool.

That character I keep writing as mute and childlike and distrustful of humans? I just think it's a neat characterization. Fun to write, honestly.

And maybe the one that makes me most nervous right now that I'm trying hard not to think to hard about because of the trend so far:

Turns out I really, REALLY love this trope I've used/consumed for a very long time. I cal it 'benevolent possession' and it's where two people are codependent and share the same body. One is nice, tired, weak, trusting, and really just wants someone they can rely on that isn't going to leave and the other one is a bit meaner, selfish, doesn't care about most things except protecting the other one and is still good but isn't /nice/.

Look, I'm probably not going to a therapist and I don't think I black out or have current memory loss, but I do have to adjust my seat and mirror half the time I get in my car and only remember my childhood sometimes and I feel like I have noticeably different opinions about gender, living, children, and my future at different times.

Also I wonder if how self aware I've become about my use of fanfiction contributes to why I don't write it as much anymore, which in turn has lead to my not having that outlet and the degradation of my mental and emotional state.

[persephoneslounge]

If You Love Art, Astrology, or Just Need a New Platform, Check this Out

If there's one thing I learned during my Saturn Return, it's I'll never fit in, and that's absolutely okay, because neither do a lot of people. A lot of voices aren't counted in the world of social media and even beyond it, and what does Nina Simone say? "You've got to learn to leave the table when love is no longer being served." But to put her idea further, you have to build your own table, and make sure that the people sitting there genuinely are meant to be there. And that's what I'm doing with my brand new social media space. I'm building a table especially for those who don't have a seat at the others. And I'm not doing this to be rebellious or make a statement, I'm really doing this to prove that social media can be done properly, with feeling. What started as an idea for a space for artists and astrology lovers, became more.

One thing that’s always stood out to me when it comes to social media is its aesthetic. Haven’t you noticed? Everything is blue, and grey. This concept of neutrality was designed to attract as many people as possible, which is great at first, until you consider what it really means: it erases diversity. There’s this idea that we mustn’t address our differences to avoid rocking the boat, because that’s dangerous. It disrupts the harmony of posting, sharing and liking, and pushes us to think critically on the content we consume and create.

Well I’ve never been the neutral type. I’ve ended friendships and even connections to family members over a silent agreement to being neutral. Yes, to some extent, we need to give people grace, but in situations where there’s an elephant in the room and people try to decorate that elephant with shiny objects, this creates a culture of conflict avoidance, which then leads to either of two things: passive-aggressiveness or censorship.

For example, on social media, you might notice people typ|ng c@pt|ons l|ke th|s. This is one way to avoid being flagged or banned with certain words, and the irony is often these words aren't actually offensive, it's what they represent. Usually people have to do this when making posts about subjects like abuse, trauma, or social issues. You know, anything that reminds the algorithm that we don’t have a perfect world where everyone is a flawless and tanned influencer. And no hate to people who work as influencers, it's just that I like my feed filled with people I actually follow already.

Social media as an introvert and artist used to be my happy place, because it’s the easiest way to connect and express myself. Till it wasn’t, and I had to carefully curate each post based on what would be the most tolerable, most "like"-able and least likely to get muted. It’s easy to say we shouldn’t take the internet seriously, but whether we want this or not, it’s a huge part of our lives, so we have no choice to make it better.

One thing that’s been lacking on social media is how we go about people who don’t fit into a specific box. I get it, it’s hard to market or share if you’re someone who’s passionate about a million and one things, but it’s even harder to put your work out there if you’re an artist since obviously, most artists enjoy more than one skill. It’s also hard sometimes for those who love spiritual topics like astrology because to an extent, there’s still a certain taboo. You could imagine how much harder this gets on platforms that thrive on stereotypes and niches. As someone who’s both an artist and an astrologer, of course I thought of you, but let’s not gatekeep either. We know what that feels like.

This is where that new platform comes in. It’s called Persephone’s Forum, and while initially it was going to be just a forum added onto my main website, I decided to take it a step further, by making it into its own social media website. You can add friends, chat, and post as expected, but... values are key here. You can even get verified, as long as you show that your account name is what you typically use online. More importantly, you don’t have to walk on eggshells anytime you post. As long as you aren’t making remarks that are racist, sexist, homophobic, or show any type of discrimination, and you don’t bully people, you’ll be welcome. Sounds like the obvious, right?

Actually that’s another thing I felt was lacking in mainstream social media, the inability or even refusal, to draw a difference between self-expression and talking down to others. It just shows the privileged position of the people who run these spaces, when they’ll ignore blatant discrimination, but will gladly ban someone just for saying something about Black Lives Matter or women’s issues, or even for mild swearing. And I get it, sometimes kids are online, but there’s only so much pleasing everyone. At some point, we need every adult to take accountability. If it’s more important to make extra profit with certain business partners than to do the right thing, is your business actually that social? If companies like Ben and Jerry’s can go about raising awareness on social causes and still make money, then the issue isn’t reputation, it’s about priorities, and those like Zuckerberg seem to be picking the wrong ones.

Going back to the point of encouraging neutrality, I think it’s just another way of saying who has a voice and who doesn’t. Because who decides what that looks like? Beyond the obvious like religion, sex, and politics, are we supposed to avoid every topic that brings up some emotion? There’s something very patriarchal in telling us that we have to swallow our emotions and just buy whatever products come up in suggested pages or late night scrolls, or to do another little dance vid. The idea that emotional posts and videos aren’t likely to get pushed for views, says a lot about where we stand as a people.

Never in my life did I even imagine creating my own platform, but in hindsight, it was bound to happen. I’ve been on almost every version of social media since 2006, and in university, my friends were a group of guys from the engineering department, so most of our conversations revolved around computers and software. Despite all this, I was studying in film but didn’t fit into that department any more than the engineering department. And if there’s one person in tech I admire for being a misfit too, it’s Steve Jobs, despite having no interest in Apple products.

Persephone’s Forum is born in a time when a lot of world events are happening, and people need a safe space. It’s here at a time where creators have to avoid posting certain pictures to prevent being shadowbanned for nudity, when there’s no actual nudity there. It’s born at a time where Mark Zuckerberg, the founder of Facebook/Meta, announced that he would start charging for the blue checkmark, which let’s be real, was initially a symbol of privilege anyway since only famous people seem to get it. It also comes at a time where Elon Musk bought Twitter, only to destroy it slowly from the inside. It also comes at a time where more than ever people are looking for ways to just be heard.

At one point, social media was the place where you could reconnect with an old friend or even just learn HOW to connect. In 2023, it’s become a place where the rich flaunt their Gucci purses and latest vacations in front of millions of followers who most likely are struggling to feed their families. It’s become a place where class is what gets you up there, unless you’re lucky, or patient enough to post incessantly every day. Not to mention scrolling feels like you’re mindlessly absorbing content, when the whole point is to be social. Now it’s just... media. I’d like to change that in some way.

Just over ten years ago, owning a social media platform was revolutionary, but these days, it’s a part of our everyday lives, which means it’s no longer enough to wow people with new emojis or life-like filters, or talks of virtual reality. These days, you have to have values and integrity. You have to show others that their voices are heard, and one thing I learned is that to the people who’ve run the show till now, we aren’t heard. That’s why I did something.

In all honesty, how can you expect diversity from mainstream platforms anyway, when they’re predominantly founded and owned by white men? Aside from Zhang Yiming, the founder of Tiktok, and Sheryl Sandberg, the COO of Meta, and of course if you want to count Whitney Wolfe Heard, the founder of dating app Bumble, there’s not much more representation. Black-owned apps TrueSo and MelaninPeople are gaining traction, but have yet to really be put in the spotlight.

Even when it comes to the aesthetic for Persephone’s Forum, there’s no blue or grey. It’s classic and elegant, but also practical, just like the Greek Goddess. It reflects what’s possible when a person takes something into their own hands. And like Persephone leaving the Underworld, it reflects a bit of hope.

The idea for Persephone’s Forum started out as really being intended for people who are artists, or who just love the arts, for people who are astrologers or who just love astrology, but I don’t like fences, I like bridges. Think of it as more of a space where you can be... yourself, whatever that means. Without any algorithm. Without any influencers (sorry not sorry). And especially without darn crummy eggshells. Also, hopefully without bots either, because those can be a pain in the #ss, and the work will be put in to keep it that way longterm.

And if I’m being honest, I don’t expect Persephone’s Forum to change the whole world. If ever it does change something, that would be amazing, but my priority is to simply keep it true to who I am, and to who a lot of other people are. It isn’t reinventing the wheel, it’s just showing off the parts that truly matter. And what we’ve been seeing lately, ain’t it. Maybe for some, but for the rest of us, we’ll be over here. Where we can be who we are, not who they want us to be.

Register for Persephone’s Forum at persephonesforum.com. The Queen of the Underworld welcomes you.

To check out my books, social media and more, visit persephoneandco.org.

https://www.tumblr.com/media/3f98dfc1c8338445c5379e82d0e791d5

[hinatto]

asking them to move in with you

feat: sukuna

genre: fluff !!

Sukuna was at a loss.

It was the third or fourth point in his life where he felt all sorts of emotions and had no idea how to go about it, the first being highschool and college and then when he realized he was in love with you.

But this was a bit different, on the same wave length of love except it was something special and 'solemn' as gojo put it. He wanted you to move in with him.

He wanted to help you get ready for appointments, scold you for your silly habits and then smile about them later, he didn't just want the random fragments of you in his home but you too.

He wanted to carry you to his home and not yours when you got hung over, he wanted to ask you what you wanted for lunch and it was weird for him to want someone in his space and while it felt personal for him, he didn't know how to go about it.

He was told from Yuuji and Gojo that it was not something to be casual about but then again this was coming from Yuuji and Gojo. But even that mute kid and panda were adamant about it.

And so he decided to consider it and so when Sukuna decided that it was time, he arranged a date with you over at his house and picked you up all dolled up with a white suit on and a black vest, traces of gel around the outline of his head so around the roots.

This wasn't the first time that Sukuna had got dressed for a date, but by the nervous glance Sukuna kept sending you (it was his nervous tick that usually told you that he was nervous) You placed a hand on his knee. And he seemed to relax, finally turning into his driveway.

He was a good cook and was good at managing his home and so he was sure he'd be a good house mate but was he going too fast? He's never asked someone to move in with him and it was annoying that only now did he start to worry about things. Everyone's advice aside, he wanted you to feel special today and safe.

"Sukuna you seem to be thinking a lot...which is unlike you." You're trying to lighten the air and he glances down at you, a wry smile already playing with his lips. "And you seem ever at ease. Its a shame that you haven't complimented my attire yet."

"You look handsome all the time though. But there's something fancy about you today like one of those stereotypical rich villain."

"Then I suppose that makes you the cringey little hero." He hands you a bouquet and you surprise him with a small bouquet of is favorite flowers. He planted them in the empty vase after the last ones had wilted.

You two settle in his house, and chatting as you start to eat (your favorite food, you note) and its so casual that Sukuna had lowered his guard and nearly forgotten what he had been thinking about all week.

It was wild that you made both yourself and him so comfortable in his home.

He didn't beat around the bush.

"I want you to move in with me so that we can live together...but what do you think?"

You freeze in mid bite, staring at him. Your eyebrows quirk up, and he can't help but smile again. "Yes, I'm serious."

That seems to stun you even more and you're nodding as you try to finish your bite and he's already picking up a napkin holding your face in place to wipe it as you try to fight out of his grip to kiss you.

But once he's done wiping he's already kissing you and then just as quickly as he began to kiss you he held wrapped his arms around you, settling his face into the crook of your neck. "I want to live with you too."

His eyes seem to sparkle with your words as he's filled with elation and he's about to reply when something clatters to the floor. And when you look down at it, your gaze crosses over the gifts peeking out under behind the mini dresser on the floor.

"Um, babe...what are those for?"

He turns around and clears his throat when he realizes what your talking about. "My back up plan."

a/n: sukuna really said bribery-

it was originally "this is a bribe..and also my back up plan."

tho this is part 2 to the going ‘asking you to move in with them together :)

[notachaconne]

St James Park pics for Good Omens fics

So I am very grateful for all the fic writers who have been cheering me up on the Good Omens binge I inexplicably had this winter. You are all magnificent and I love and appreciate you and your freedom of expression and your crazy, contradictory, beautiful ideas. So, I decided to go to Tate Britain as a pre-Christmas treat, and I decided to walk there from Charing Cross, and on the way it occurred to me that some of you might like to know what St James' Park actually looks like in winter.

The time, in these pictures, was between 12:30 and 13:00. Sunset will be about 4pm. Dawn about 8am.

If you are a writer and you have a London question or there's something you'd specifically like a picture of, comment and I'll see what I can do.

I hope someone enjoys this.

Did you know that that the most striking birds there are not the ducks, but the black swans? Did you know how pretty they are, with their bright red beaks and black feathers? Did you know they have concealed white underwings that you can't see unless they get cross and fluffy? Or that they are so much smaller and more elegant-looking than the white ones?

There are SO MANY coots. The ones with white beaks are called coots. The ones with red beaks are called moorhens. The coots have blue feet. Enormous blue feet. The moorhens' feet are striped. There are hundreds of these, way more than ducks.

There are also hundreds of terns, and of course reasonable numbers of pigeons and some Canada Geese. I saw a heron, too. The music here is coming from a military marching band on Pall Mall, behind me.

In reality, we are asked not to feed the wildlife. But it's traditional. Do with this as you will.

View from the bridge. That's Buckingham Palace. Pall Mall is to our right. I've always wondered why it's called Buckingham. I think I checked at some point, and the results were a bit disappointing, considering why the name is famous.

View looking the other way. That's the London Eye. Admiralty Arch, which now appears to be a pretentious hotel, is just out of sight to our left, I walked under it to get here. You can compare maps and it should make some sense. The huge wakes in these pictures are being formed by mute swans (the white ones).

I can't get over how Crowley the black swans are. But they are much smaller than the white ones. These mute swans are fluffing up, but you can still see they're much bigger to start with.

Anyway, I continued southwards, out of the park, past the police headquarters I think it is, and I reached this food joint, which has seating and a lot of art.

Just along the street is the rather splendidly named Adam and Eve pub. No idea what it's like inside.

Continuing south, there is a good place to get street lunch on weekdays. Falafels, tortillas, etc, but I'm out of picture space (10 per post).