#and i still protected him for MONTHS bc i did not want this situation to become involved with my work

[a9saga]

the fucking week i have had in the last 24 hours

[soobnny]

dating him | han jisung

❝ you found my heart broken and you helped me make it whole again ❞

chan | lee know | changbin | hyunjin | HAN | felix | seungmin | jeongin

i think you’re a second love type situation for han jisung

the one where he thought he’d never recover from his first heartbreak

but then here u come

i think han’s the type of person to feel everything

if he’s in love, he’s in LOVE

and if he’s hurt, it would just be overwhelming pain

so imagine how he was when he got his first heartbreak

he’d lose a little bit of his spark

maybe keep to himself even more than he used to

u come to his life in the form of a friend first

and han has unknowingly planted a seed that’s grown and grown and grown

with every interaction

with every laugh you’ve brought back

with every moment he was coming out of his shell again

until it’s fully bloomed into a love that’s very very real and very very present

han jisung would also love so beautifully

he knows what it’s like to be hurt, and he doesn’t ever want u to feel that same pain

he rly makes efforts

he is FULL of efforts

and he makes u laugh ☹️☹️☹️☹️

he communicates

and when the boys finally meet u, they’re very grateful but also

????!!!! why do u they know ur favorite color

and ur go-to order at the cafe

and the hoodie u like to steal from jisung the most

well turns out, han loves talking about u to his friends

they just know everything about u before even meeting u

he’d get rly shy about it but never embarrassed

he’d tell the whole world about u if he could

what else can i tell u

han jisung is just someone where nothing sounds crazy to him

so i think all ur dates with him would be so fun and adventurous lowk

amusement parks !!!!!

ice skating and roller blading

both of u would fall on ur ass

but you’d also laugh so much and somehow that makes up for everything

you’d be holding hands and skating with each other and looking at each other with lovesick smiles

I FEEL SICK!!!!!!!!

he’s always trying to impress u too

he tries to imitate figure skaters

kids don’t try this at home

ofc he fails miserably

obvious blushes when you’d tell him he was cute for trying

or when you’d praise him

anyways when i said he’s always trying to impress u i mean ALWAYS

he treats the relationship like he’s still pining after you

being the standard fr

he never lets go of the love

sometimes he’d still get shy to ask u out

somehow he doesn’t believe u actually said yes to him

he thinks he’s the luckiest boy

anyways, aside from adventurous dates, he equally values his inside time and quieter dates

he’s thankful u understand his shifts in his energy

on days u stay inside, you’d probably watch horror movies

look…. he suggests it….

it looked cool in his head to be all protective

you’d hold onto his arm when the jumpscares come

but

womp womp

he ends up being more afraid than u

and now HE’S holding ur arm

yeah it looked way cooler in his head

you’d play silly little board games together

or maybe charades

he’s so easily amused by sexual innuendos

he’s just a man guys

anyways

there are two things he loves to steal from u the most

aside from ur kisses

and it’s (1) ur perfume and (2) ur lip balm

u’d catch him putting on ur perfume just bc he wants to be surrounded by ur scent

it’s very comforting

one time, he was sick and the boys were taking care of him

and when u finally had time to take over and care for ur bf

u just …. smell ur perfume

“did you put on my perfume?”

“i missed you ☹️☹️☹️☹️”

DOWN BADDDDD

he’s so pouty and so cute

let’s suffocate him with the pillow

KIDDINGGGGGG KIDDING

and then ur lip balm

sometimes he steals the actual thing

sometimes he kisses you so he can have it on his lips too

han jisung is also the type to avail every possible couple coupon

and he’s always begging the cashiers to let u prove u’re a couple

it’s so he has an excuse to kiss you

so

months into dating him also means a thousand love letters

he loves writing u love letters

and u know sooner that he also writes songs

on ur anniversary, he reveals a song he’s written for you

and when he proposes, he tells u about every single one he’d ever written about you and for you

wish that were me 😂😂😂😂😂

TAKE CARE OF HIM

note. credits to user @.luvknow for the layout of this post! let me know what you think! please discuss these with me i’m crazy

[itneverendshere]

okay we know rafes help reader in situations like with electricity and no car and such. but maybe it’s the first time where he knows he’s in love with her and she’s the one for him, where she doesn’t go to him for any help. and it’s maybe like not having enough money to buy groceries for herself, or how she walks to work still bc she can’t afford gas. and he gets so mad, and she thinks it’s an inconvenience to him. but it’s actually because rafe will always be there for her, and no matter what the problem is , he can fix it just for her

you got me overnight - r.c

pairing: rafe x pogue!reader(bartender!reader universe) warnings: first fight and confession 🫂

Rafe knew convincing you he was worth a shot was the easiest part of your relationship.

You were absolutely perfect, made to be his. He could picture you right now, the way you’d smile at his stupid jokes, the warmth of your hand in his, or how you’d send him those random "good morning" texts that hit him like a gut punch every time. You were everything. It wasn’t just the way you looked, although that obviously had him floored, but the way you thought about things, the way you cared about people. It was all of it. You gave a shit.

That was something new for him.

He never thought he’d get someone like you, someone who made him want to be better. It was months later, and he was hooked.

Totally gone. You were the real deal for him. Every time his phone buzzed with your name on the screen, it hit him in the chest. Hard.

So when you dropped it on him, casually, that you were walking to work because you didn’t have the gas money while he’d been away on a family holiday, it set off something inside him.

You said it like it was no big deal, like it was just another part of your day. He was losing it. The idea of you walking to work, sweating it out while he was chilling on vacation, made him feel sick. He couldn’t wrap his head around it.

Rafe’s jaw clenched. He didn’t understand why you didn’t tell him earlier, didn’t ask for help. Why didn’t you call him? He could’ve handled it in a second, no problem. You didn’t need to be doing stuff like that. 

“You’ve been walking to work?”

“Yeah… it’s fine. It’s not far,” you replied, brushing it off like it was nothing.

But it wasn’t nothing. Not to him. He knew how far your walk was.

He knew it wasn’t just around the corner. And you didn’t have to be doing this. Even if he hadn’t been there for the past week to give you a ride as he usually did, he could’ve taken care of it even if he was miles away. He was always here for you, even if he wasn’t physically there.

Rafe gripped the counter tighter, trying to keep his frustration under control, for your sake. “Why didn’t you say anything? You didn’t tell me you were low on gas.”

You gave a little shrug, as if that was the end of the conversation.

“Didn’t wanna bother you. It’s not your problem.”

Didn’t wanna bother him? Not his problem? You were his problem, the best kind of problem, and he couldn’t understand why you thought you had to handle everything by yourself. It pissed him off—not at you, but at the fact that you were doing this, struggling in silence. It was like you didn’t trust him to be there for you. 

You didn’t trust him enough to lean on him when you needed something.

“What do you mean it’s not my problem?” His voice came out harsher than what he'd hoped for, and you froze, eyes wide.

“Whoa. Chill,” you said, holding your hands up defensively. “I didn’t think you’d get so worked up about it. I can handle it.”

But that wasn’t the point. You shouldn’t have to handle it. Not when you had him. You were supposed to lean on him, to come to him when things like this came up. 

That’s what being together meant.

It was crazy to him. Every part of him wanted to protect you, to make sure you didn’t have to deal with anything like this on your own. The thought of you walking to work—tired, probably stressed out—while he was away doing nothing important...he hated it.

"You don’t have to handle it, though," he argued, voice softer now but still frustrated “That’s the thing. You don’t get it, do you? I want to help. I need to help. When you're struggling, that's my problem too. I wanna be there for you. Always.”

You looked at him like he was overreacting like he was making something out of nothing. “Baby, it’s not that serious. It’s just a couple of walks. You’re acting like I was in danger or something.”

He ran a hand through his hair, trying to calm down, but it wasn’t working. "It's not about the fucking walks. It's the fact that you didn’t even think to tell me. Like I wouldn’t care.”

You sighed, rubbing your temples like you were tired of this conversation already. “I didn’t wanna bother you. You were on vacation. I didn’t want to stress you out over something so small.”

He didn’t know why it pissed him off so much, but it did. It was gnawing at him like a splinter under his skin, “You’re serious? You didn’t think it was worth mentioning?” 

You shifted on your feet, already defensive. “I don’t know. I didn’t think it was that big of a deal. I figured I’d just handle it.”

“That’s exactly the problem!” he snapped, stepping closer to you, his hand gesturing wildly. “You figured you’d handle it? What the fuck? Why would you think I wouldn’t want to know about something like this?”

“Because it’s stupid gas money, Rafe!” you fired back, your frustration bubbling to the surface now. “I didn’t wanna bother you with something so small! You were gone, and I didn’t want to make it a whole fucking thing.”

He could hear the irritation in your voice, but it just made him angrier.

You thought you were protecting him from being “bothered,” but all it did was make him feel like you didn’t need him. Like you didn’t think he could help, or worse, like you didn’t want him to.

“Small? Are you fucking kiddin’ me? You walked to work for how many days, in the heat, probably tired as fuck, and you think that’s small?” His voice was rising, and he hated that he couldn’t control it, but he was too worked up now. “It’s not about the gas money. It’s the fact that you didn’t tell me. You kept it to yourself, like I’m just some fucking dude who’s not in your life like that.”

You crossed your arms, your own frustration clear. “Rafe, you’re blowing this way out of proportion. I didn’t need to tell you because I can take care of myself. I’m not helpless.”

“That’s not what this is about!” he nearly shouted, the words tumbling out before he could stop them. “This isn’t about you being helpless or not! It’s about you letting me be there for you, letting me help you when things get tough. Shit. That’s what this is, what we are. You don’t fucking get it.”

“I do fucking get it, Rafe!” you snapped back, stepping closer to him, your eyes burning with misplaced anger. “But I don’t need to run to you every time something goes wrong. I’m not gonna fall apart because of a few days without a car.”

He was grinding his teeth now, trying to keep his composure but failing miserably. “It’s not about falling apart. It’s about the fact that you didn’t even think to lean on me! You didn’t trust me enough to just call and say, ‘Hey baby, I’m low on gas. Can you help?’ You shouldn’t have to figure it out on your own.”

You threw your hands up, exasperated. “I did figure it out! I walked. It wasn’t some huge disaster. I made it work.”

“But you shouldn’t have had to!” he yelled, his voice echoing in the kitchen. “Why can’t you get that? You don’t have to handle shit like this alone! I want to be there for you. I need to be there for you. Don’t you get that?”

You flinched at the volume of his voice, but you didn’t back down.

“You’re acting like I don’t care about us because I didn’t ask you to bail me out. I care, Rafe. But I can deal with things on my own, too. I’m not just gonna dump every little problem on you like it’s your job to fix everything.”

Rafe shook his head, running his hands through his hair for the millionth time, pacing now because he couldn’t stand still. “It is my job, though. That’s the whole fucking point. I’m supposed to be the one you come to when things go wrong sweets, big or small. I’m supposed to be the one who makes your life easier, not the guy you hide stuff from.”

You let out a frustrated laugh, disbelief coloring your tone. “Hide? Seriously? You think I’m hiding things from you? It was gas money, Rafe, not some deep, dark secret.”

“It feels like it, though!” he shot back, voice cracking slightly, betraying the emotion he’d been holding back. “It feels like you don’t trust me. Like I’m not… like I’m not enough for you to depend on.”

You went silent at that, your arms dropping to your sides as you stared at him, the tension between you thick and heavy. “That’s not fair,” you said quietly, shaking your head. “You know that’s not true.��

“Do I?” his voice cracked slightly, “Because it doesn’t feel like it. I’m out here thinking I’m the one who’s supposed to have your back, but you’re just out there, dealing with stuff alone. It makes me feel like… I don’t know. Like I’m not even part of your life like that.”

“That’s not what this is,” you said, stepping toward him now, the fight draining out of your voice. “I didn’t ask you because I didn’t want you to worry. Not because I don’t trust you. I thought I was helping by not making you deal with it.”

He let out a bitter laugh. “Helping? You think it helps me to know you’re struggling and didn’t say anything? That’s not helping. Shit, that’s torture, baby. I’d rather know and fix it than find out after and feel like an idiot because I wasn’t there.”

You sighed, rubbing your face with both hands, exhaustion settling in. “Rafe, I didn’t mean to make you feel like that. I didn’t think it was that serious.”

“It’s serious to me,” he said, his voice almost a whisper now, the anger ebbing away, leaving only the hurt behind. “Because I love you. And when you love someone, you don’t want them to handle things alone. You want to be there. Always.”

You froze, eyes wide as you stared at him. What? He hadn’t planned to say it like this, not in the middle of a fight, but there it was—out there and real.

“I love you,” he repeated, quieter this time. “And I need you to understand that means I’m here. For all of it. No matter how small it seems.”

He said it. He loved you. Maybe it wasn’t the best timing, but at least it was out of his chest. This man who had always been so intense, so fiercely protective, was looking at you like you held his entire world in your hands. And you did.

He loved you. That word—love—felt huge, almost too much. But it was what you had felt for him too. It was why you held back from asking for help, not because you didn’t trust him, but because you didn’t want to burden him with every little problem. You thought you were protecting him. Now, standing there, you realized maybe you’d gotten it wrong.

“You l-love me?”

“Yeah. I thought that was obvious by now.”

“Rafe…” you started, but he shook his head, his jaw clenched like he was bracing himself for rejection.

“It’s fine,” he mumbled, turning away, his hand running through his face. “You don’t have to say anything. I just—I just needed you to know.”

“No.” You stepped forward, reaching for his hand before he could pull completely away. “No, you don’t get to do that. You don’t get to just say it and walk away like I’m not standing right here.”

His gaze shot back to yours, confused and a little bit guarded, like he wasn’t sure what to expect.

“I love you too,” you said, the words feeling right as soon as they left your lips. You squeezed his hand, needing him to feel it. “I love you, okay? I didn’t ask for help because I didn’t want to drag you into my mess. I thought I was being strong, handling things on my own. I never wanted you to feel like I didn’t need you. I do need you,” you continued, stepping closer, your voice trembling slightly. “And I know now that I should’ve just called. That I should’ve let you help me, because that’s what we do. We’re a team. I just didn’t want to be a burden.”

Rafe let out a shaky breath, his shoulders sagging as if the weight of the world had just been lifted off him. He pulled you into his arms, holding you tight against his chest, his grip almost desperate. You melted into him, burying your face in the crook of his neck, feeling the calming thrum of his heartbeat.

“You’re not a burden,” he whispered, his voice hoarse. “You’ll never be a burden. I just—I need you to let me be there for you. I don’t care what it is. Big or small, I wanna know. I wanna help.”

You nodded against his chest, breathing in his familiar scent, letting the warmth of his skin calm you.

“Okay. I promise.”

He pulled back slightly, just enough to look at you, his thumb brushing lightly against your cheek. There was something in his eyes now that hadn’t been there before—relief, maybe, but more than that. Love. He felt you relax against him, your body molding into his.

“Say it again,” he murmured, a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth.

You chuckled softly, your hand resting on his chest, feeling the rapid beat of his heart under your palm. “I love you, Rafe.”

He leaned down, pressing his forehead against yours. “I need you to get something,” he said softly, his voice much calmer now “When I say I love you, I’m not just saying it. I mean it. Like… for real. I’m in this, all the way.”

You blinked up at him, your eyes wide “I—” you started, but he shook his head, cutting you off gently.

“No, listen,” he interrupted, “I’ve never felt like this before. You’re everything. And I love you for it. I love every single part of you.”

He felt his chest tighten as he said it, like the words were coming from somewhere so deep inside him that he hadn’t even realized they were there until now. But they were, and they were real. He didn’t just love you—he needed you. He wasn’t sure if you’d even processed it yet. Then, slowly, you grinned, your eyes glistening just a little. 

 “This just… it feels so big. Holy shit, bigger than anything I’ve ever felt.”

“That’s because it is big,” Rafe said, his voice dropping to a whisper as he pressed his forehead against yours again. “It’s the biggest thing in the world to me. You are.”

Your breath hitched, and he could feel you trembling slightly in his arms. You reached up, cupping his face with your hands, and for the first time since the fight started, Rafe felt like you were really seeing him. Not just in that moment, but all of him—the guy who was scared out of his mind at how much he needed you, but who was willing to do anything to keep you close.

“I love you too,” you said it again, your voice shaking a little as you said it. “I’m sorry.”

 “We’re in this together,” he kissed your knuckles, his own fingers gently brushing through your hair. “No more going through stuff alone. Not you, not me. We’ve got each other now.”

You smiled, and Rafe felt like he could breathe again, really breathe, for the first time all night. “Deal,” you whispered.

And right there, he knew that everything was going to be okay.

Because you weren’t just someone he loved—you were his person. 

[hannieehaee]

Svt ot13 having to break up with their s/o for the sake of the group and their public image?

having to break up bc of their career (but not really)

content: established relationship, potential break up, public scrutiny, angst (no sad ending though ofc), etc.

wc: 804

a/n: i switched this up a bit to how they'd react to controversy about your relationship since i hate writing unresolved angst or angst with sad endings oops sorry </3

masterlist

seungcheol -

im sawrryyy his ass is far too stubborn to break up a relationship just bc his label wants him to. he also would not care what the tabloids are saying. he'd maybe consider it if it was affecting you, but ultimately he'd rather go on hiatus or just put up with the scrutiny rather than actually break up.

jeonghan -

he'd never admit to a relationship publicly no matter how damning the evidence was. would just completely ignore the subject and throw subtle lies about it. wouldnt even have to consider breaking up with you bc he wouldnt even acknowledge any backlash from your relationship at all lol.

joshua -

kinda odd to write about him considering ... anyways i think he would do the same as hannie and just not acknowledge the damage a relationship would do to his public image. i mean. if he finally found someone who he feels strongly enough about to let into his messy life why would he ever consider ending it? he'd feel affected by it, though, knowing the scrutiny would also fall on you.

jun -

he might bring up the controversy very subtly during a live or maybe one day straight up make a statement about it but never actually let it go further than that. he seems super private with his family, so if your relationship were to begin causing public uproar he'd just tighten the reigns on his privacy a bit more.

soonyoung -

just annoyed and frustrated about it. would try and subtly scold the media (and carats a little bit) about it on one of his private weverse lives. if the situation got too intense, though, he'd just opt for hybe putting out some type of statement denying the relationship in order to protect you from public opinion as much as be could.

wonwoo -

he's so nice and understanding and never blames fans for anything (even though sometimes he 100% should *cough* the mobbings *cough*) so he wouldnt blame anyone for their emotions towards his relationship. would consult with you and give you an out if you felt like you couldnt handle the situation (even though it absolutely broke his heart to even consider breaking up) but when you denied him he'd simply opt for putting up with the negative press and just continue to love you as privately as he could.

jihoon -

only one who gives me the vibes that he might actually try and break up with you just bc he loves you too much to put you through all this unwarranted hate all bc of his public image. butttt would not survive the heartbreak he felt at breaking up with someone he clearly still loved and would run back into your arms within the month.

seokmin -

just complete emotional turmoil. he wouldnt wanna break up, but if you did, he'd do it just for you. he also wouldnt wanna deny your relationship bc he'd feel like that'd be disrespectful to you. anddd he also would not wanna confirm your relationship since that'd just add extra hate to you. he'd opt to do anything you chose, making you his main priority.

mingyu -

his ass would NAWWWTTT care if people thought badly of him being in a relationship. he'd keep it as private as he could, but would never even entertain the thought of breaking up when dispatch suddenly got a hold of your relationship and the situation blew up. very nonchalant about it all, feeling too confident in your love to think anything could ever drive the two of you apart.

minghao -

gives me the vibes that he might just opt for making the usual statement idols always make of 'x idol is seeing x idol with warm feelings' or whatever the fuck they usually write. other than that he would still keep the relationship very on the down low and never allow public opinion to affect his emotions towards you.

seungkwan -

would take a very logical and professional approach to it by immediately denying any relationship and claiming the two of you are friends lol. he's so friendly with everyone it'd be very believable. wouldn't have it in him to break up a personal relationship over his career thoughhhh he's just too full of love to do that.

vernon -

yet another member to just absolutely ignore anything going on and straight up not care for any public reaction about it. wanna send trucks? wanna write articles about him? he's not even gonna see them.

chan -

would feel insanelyyyy bad that he ever put you in the limelight in such a negative light. would also feel embarrassed and annoyed at the fact that merely being with you would become such a scandal. in the end, he'd also just opt to ignoring the situation and denying the relationship in order to preserve your peace.

[honeybeefae]

Making An Heir (Eris Vanserra x Reader)

KINKTOBER DAY THIRTEEN: BREEDING

Summary// The pressure from the advisors and members of the court for the two of you to produce an heir is high. It is all anyone can talk about and while you certainly enjoy the idea of having children, you don’t expect Eris to feel the same given his parental history. He has stayed mostly quiet on the subject until he catches you in the mirror with a pillow under your blouse, imagining what it would be like. 

(I know this is out of order for the Kinktober fic but so many of you guys requested it so enjoy it, you dirty little readers. Also thanks so much for the anon who suggested subspace bc that was so much fun to write! ;))

WARNINGS: 18+, smut, breeding kink, rough sex, dirty talk, subspace, dom!Eris, sub!Reader, cumming inside (pls wear protection), talk of pregnancy

You had been mated with Eris for five years now and it was like you were truly living for the first time. He was the center of your life, the ship in the middle of the ocean, the warm blanket you cuddled with at night. Life began and ended with him and you knew he felt the same way.

He spoiled you with anything you could ever want. Jewels, dresses, books, pets, anything your heart desired he would go find because he loved making you happy. You knew not every mated couple had such a good life, that sometimes fate was more than met the eye, but yours was truly meant to be.

Everything had been perfect in your lives…except for the last few months. The Autumn Court advisors had been prying into your private lives, pestering Eris on when he would produce an heir. It angered you every time it was brought up as they acted like it was your fault. As if you were the one who was refusing a child.

It couldn’t have been farther from the truth. You had wanted children with Eris since you first started courting, dreaming about the little red-headed babes running around your feet. Fae pregnancies were incredibly difficult on the body and were also rare, however, you had no fear. 

But you could not say the same for your mate. Eris avoided the subject like the plague. He would shut down his advisors with a simple wave of his hand and a frown while also doing the same with you.

You knew some of it was his own fears of fatherhood given how he was raised with Beron but you had assured him many times that he was not his father. Eris is ten times the man Beron was but he couldn’t seem to understand that. It was one of his worst fears to turn out like him.

Eris was also terrified of something happening to you. He had heard of what almost happened to Feyre, albeit her situation was a little different. What if he lost you? He didn’t have some magical gift from the Cauldron to bring you back. You would be gone forever and he would either be left alone or with a child who killed his mate, their mother. How could he love someone that did that?

The last two weeks had been full of tension as one of Eris’s brother’s wives had fallen pregnant, announcing it in court with an evil smirk on his lips. He knew exactly what he was doing by making such a public spectacle and you had had to force a smile the rest of the evening as everyone stared at you in judgment.

In their heads, you had only one job to do that you were currently failing at. This entire situation was weighing heavily on your shoulders but you did not want to force Eris into something he did not want. 

However, that didn’t mean you couldn’t wish for it still, did it? That you couldn’t desire it secretly in the quiet of your bedroom?  Eris was supposed to be gone for the day on a hunting trip, the first he’s taken in a month, so no one should be seeking you out until nightfall.

Your eyes landed on a soft pillow atop your shared bed, biting down on the inside of your cheek as you walked quietly over and grabbed it. There was no real need for you to be quiet but you still felt as if you were doing something wrong. You went back to the mirror in the corner of your room and stood in front of it, positing yourself to the side.

With one hand you lifted up your skirts and used the other to stuff the pillow inside it until it was settled against your belly, making it pop and give a lumpy shape of roundness. It didn’t look like a typical pregnant belly but the feelings that ran through you were all the same.

Sadness, pining, joy, pain, it was a cocktail of emotions that made your head spin. 

You began to imagine it as your real belly, of all the dresses you could have tailored and how Eris would kiss your stomach every morning and night. Would Eris like you like this? Would he be constantly wanting to touch you, rub you, or would he want nothing to do with you?

Minutes passed as you watched yourself in the mirror, rubbing the pillow as if it were real. You were so lost in your fantasy that you didn’t hear the heavy footsteps of your mate or the door opening.

“What are you doing?” His voice pierced through your imagination, making you jump and turn towards him.

“Eris, I-” You flounder over your words, cheeks heating up as he stares at you with furrowed brows. “I was just, I mean, Eris I’m sorry…”

“Is that a pillow?” You couldn’t tell if he was teasing you playfully or if he was genuinely upset. Either way, the embarrassment made you want to be swallowed by the floor. Quickly you yanked the pillow out from underneath your dress and held it behind your back, looking down at the floor.

“I know you don’t want kids. I know you don’t want to talk about it. I promise this isn’t a trick or anything I just wanted-” You explained, tears wetting your eyelashes as he came over to you and lifted your head up. 

“What did you want, my lady?” Eris murmured, amber eyes softening at how upset you were. “You can tell me.”

“It’s nothing. I don’t want to pressure you into anything.”

“Y/N.” His voice was stern, knowing that wasn’t the truth. 

“I just wanted to see what I would look like pregnant.” You whispered. “It was silly.”

“Do you want to be pregnant?” He asked you lowly, catching your eyes once more. “Is that what you want?”

You felt the words stuck in your throat as he stepped closer to you, caging you in his arms. When he found you thought that he was going to be angry or disappointed but this reaction was completely unexpected.

“My advisors have been hounding my back nonstop over this… predicament of  ours.” Eris continued on, the corner of his lip turning upwards. “Day after day, night after night. I had been worried you weren’t ready, that you would be terrified, and yet here I catch you doing this.”

“I-” You tried to interrupt but quickly shut your mouth when he grabbed your hips roughly, turning you around so that your back was to his chest and you were staring at yourself in the mirror.

“You what? Hm?” He taunted, intertwining your hand with his and slowly dragging it down your body. Goosebumps rose on your skin as his smoldering eyes never left yours, his pupils blown wide with desire. “You want me to fill you up with my cum, little fox? To pound into you like a beast takes his bitch? To breed you?”

Eris loved to talk like this in the bedroom and you weren’t ashamed to admit that you also loved it. The control, the domination, of his words made you melt and want to please him. And with the words he was saying about breeding you…it was no surprise that your pussy was clenching in anticipation.

“I asked you a question, Y/N. I expect you to answer.” Eris reprimanded, his lips ghosting the shell of your ear as his other hand came to circle around your throat. “Is that what my lady commands of her lord? To fuck an heir into her?”

Whiplash was the only thing that you could describe as feeling with how things were turning out. It was like a flip had been switched in him but you were already too drunk on lust to question it, nodding your head and whimpering.

“Yes, yes, sir.” You answered, groaning when he untangled his hand from yours and squeezed your breasts through your dress. “I…I want you to fill me up.”

“Breed you. You want me to breed you.” He corrected, pinching your pebbled nipple which had you squirming. “Say it.”

You swallowed thickly and looked at him through the mirror. 

“I want you to breed me, my lord.”

Eris grinned wickedly and turned you back towards him, wrapping your hair around his hand and pulling your neck back until it was almost at a ninety-degree angle.

“Well then, I suppose we better get started. Now.”

He was anything but gentle as he took the collar of your dress and ripped it with his bare hands, biceps flexing underneath the thin material of his shirt. You shivered as your body was exposed to the cool air. 

“On your hands and knees.” He orders, smiling when you immediately followed his command. Normally you would mouth off and be a little brat, asking for punishment, but tonight it seemed you were ready to be his good little girl. 

You turn to look behind you, feeling your wetness grow from the way he was devouring you with his eyes. Eris began to rid himself of his clothes, his cock standing at attention and ready to pump you full of his hot seed. He climbed behind you, his large hands running over the curve of your ass.

The bed dipped as he knelt on his knees, pushing the material of your panties to the side to unveil your dripping cunt. “I love how wet you get for me, Y/N,” Eris growled, licking his lips. “I’ve barely even touched you and you are already making a mess on these sheets.”

“I’m sorry, sir.” You whisper, not sure if he wanted you to apologize or not. He chuckled and ran a single finger down your pussy, collecting the juices and bringing them to his mouth.

“Look at my little fox using her manners.” He praised, moaning at the taste of you. “You want this badly don’t you?”

“Mhm.” You nod, taking in shaky breaths as you felt hot air on your lips. It was a wonder that your entire body wasn’t shaking with need at this point.

“Well what my lady wants, she gets.” Eris said before burying himself in your sex, his tongue flicking over your clit in quick swipes while his nose teased your hole. “Fuck you taste like heaven on my tongue.”

You could only whine in response, legs squeezing either side of his head as he feasted on you. He knew all the right speeds and ways to eat you out, how to make you sing in pleasure. Your arms were wobbling from the waves of pleasure he was giving you.

The room was filled with the filthy sounds of him slurping you up, one of his hands kneading your ass while the other stroked his cock. You could hear the wet sounds of him touching himself, making you even more delirious. 

“I want you to cum on my tongue, little fox.” Eris said firmly, taking your entire clit into his mouth and sucking. The action had you crying out in ecstasy, feeling like you were floating above your body as your entire body shook. 

He was always able to make you cum quickly because he took the time to know everything that made you tick, good and bad. Eris used it to his advantage many times and tonight was no different. You didn’t want this to be over so early but you also knew that tonight was special. This was going to be the first of many.

“Eris, ah!” You cried out, feeling that coil in you snap. He grunted in satisfaction when you started to mindlessly grind backward onto his face, your hands fisting the sheets. “It feels so good, sir.”

Every last drop of your cum went down his throat and his chin, his eyes closed in bliss. When you started to squirm from sensitivity he pulled back, holding the base of his cock and lining it up with your entrance.

“I’m going to breed you now,” Eris growled, not giving you a chance to recover as he thrust in until his balls slapped against your already tender clit. “And you are going to take it all, aren’t you?”

You didn’t answer fast enough, couldn’t answer, as you were still reeling from what he had just done. However, your mate had little patience and was quick to grab your hair once more, pulling it until you whined. 

“Yes, Eris, yes,” You stuttered, enjoying the slight burn coming from your cunt as he stretched you out. “I’ll take it all, I’ll be good.”

His eyes were almost completely black as he gave you a feral grin, pulling almost all the way out before stuffing you full. Your tits were bouncing with each thrust, your hair still wrapped around his hand as he threw his head back in rapture.

“I know you will. I know you will.” He cooed, pulling his head back to watch his cock go in and out. The sheets were indeed a mess underneath you, a giant wet stain that was only going to grow as the night went on. 

One of your hands went down and began to fiddle with your swollen clit, moaning loudly as he fucked you hard. Eris noticed and clicked his tongue, using the hand that had your hair and pushing your face into the mattress. 

“Look at you, already trying to cum again.” Eris jeered, his grip bruising on your hips. “My lady is just a desperate little whore, isn’t she? A little whore who wants to be bred, to carry my children and do it over and over and over again.”

Your cries were muffled as he laughed darkly, feeling the familiar tingle of his own orgasm creeping up his spine. “But she’s such a pretty whore…” He purred, letting go of your head to brush the hair out of your face. Your entire body was being jolted by the force of his body, and your mascara was smudged, but you were too high on your own lust to care. 

“Please, please, please, sir.” You babbled, bottom lip quivering. “I wanna cum, I want you to fill me up, please.”

He grunted and furrowed his brows, his long red hair sticking to his forehead from the sweat as he put all his concentration on your pussy. “You don’t get to cum right now, Y/N. I want you to hold it in for me.”

Eris’s thrusts grew sloppily as his balls tightened, picturing you with a swollen belly and heavy tits. It made his mouth water and he barely heard your pleas of mercy. You felt the first spurts shoot into you, his cum almost burning, and it made your entire cunt clench around his cock.

“Don’t you fucking cum.” He swore, groaning in pleasure as he emptied himself into your womb. You felt tears fall down your cheek, desperately craving that release. It was taking all the will of your body to not give in to what you wanted.

The sheer amount of cum was too much for you to contain and it leaked through the seal of your lips, dripping onto your legs and the bed. He gave two more thrusts before pulling out completely, admiring the way he left you gaping and gushing. 

“You did so well, little fox.” Eris commended, pushing two thick fingers inside you and scooping out the mixture of his seed and your juices. He flipped you onto your back with one hand, your hair sprawling around you as he held those fingers over your mouth. “Suck.”

With tears staining your cheeks you followed his orders, chest rising and falling quickly as you swallowed it like you knew he wanted. Eris’s eyes turned tender upon seeing you, breaking the facade briefly to capture your lips in a gentle kiss. You were grateful for it even though you were still aching for him to let you cum.

After a minute he pulled away, noticing you fidgeting. “Does my little whore want something? Was that not enough for her?”

You nodded shyly, eyes widening when he laid down beside you and then patted his lap. His cock was already hard once more, glistening in the firelight. You climbed onto his lap, looking down at him. 

“Well? What do you want?” He pressed, one of his hands resting on your hip while the other went to your cunt. Eris smirked as he pressed the pad of his thumb against your clit, enjoying the way you jumped. “You want to cum again? Greedy little girl.”

“I-” You tried to interject but shut your mouth when he suddenly lifted you up as if you weighed nothing, your hole hovering above the tip of his dick. 

“It is greedy, Y/N.” He cut you off. “If you want to cum again you need to say it.”

The words were on the tip of your tongue. Eris loved to make you say these things, to make you degrade yourself. It made you feel embarrassed but you also knew you weren’t going to get what you wanted if you didn’t.

“I”m a greedy little girl.” You murmured, sucking in a sharp breath as he thrust up slowly. Inch by inch he filled you again, both of your cum making it easy for him to slide in. “I want to cum again, to be filled up by you, sir.”

“Ride me then, Y/N,” Eris ordered, letting you bottom out and giving you a hardy smack on your ass. “Take what you want. Be a good girl and fuck yourself on my cock. Make yourself cum.”

Some people would think that this was a blessing, that he was giving you what you wanted, but it was far from the truth. You did love riding him, loved watching him watch you, but he knew as well as you did that you needed him to make you cum. You couldn’t do it yourself.

You began to bounce on him, hoping this time you might be able to do it without him, and moaned as he hit that spot deep inside you. Your hips rolled and breasts swayed with each rise and fall of your body, his amber eyes never leaving your face.

“That’s it, my little whore, ride your lord’s cock.” He snickered, noticing the frustration building within you. “Show me how badly you want it.”

The need in your stomach was growing like an inferno. You were fucking yourself with all your strength, both of your hands resting on either side of his body as you whimpered through your teeth and closed your eyes in concentration. 

“I want it, I want it, please sir.” You whined, your mind slowly slipping away from you as you seemed to stay on the edge of orgasm for hours. It was driving you insane. “Eris, Eris, I can’t. I need, I need-”

“What do you need, Y/N?” He cooed, smiling as your eyelashes fluttered and your hips finally slowed. His cock fell out of you and he knew you were getting into your subspace, something that made him feel tender and hungry at the same time. “Do you need my help?”

You barely had the coherency to nod, looking up at him with complete trust and want. “Please…”

He kissed your forehead and rolled you onto your back, lining up his cock and inching himself inside you once more. Both of his hands interlocked with yours and brought them above your head, keeping you still as he started a slow, hard rhythm.

You called out his name in ecstasy, enjoying the way his lips trailed over your neck and collarbone. “My sweet lady, so ready to take my cum and let me knock her up.” He breathed into your ear, pressing his forehead against yours.

“This is all you want, all you need, is my cock inside you.” Eris’s breaths were coming faster now, loving the way your walls fluttered around him. “You wanted to be bred and now you are. Your cunt is so full of me that you’ll be leaking for days, feeling it drip down your leg but it doesn’t matter because I’ll keep stuffing your pussy every night until this belly is round and tight.”

Your eyes rolled into the back of your head as you felt the crest of your orgasm coming up, your back arching off the bed as your throat burned from all the screaming you had been doing. All you could do now was whimper, your hands coming to circle around your neck as you babbled incoherently.

“Eris, please, I wanna, please,” You turned your head from side to side, eyebrows scrunching together. “Cum, let me, Gods, please!”

“Do it, Y/N.” Eris encouraged, moving his hips until he felt that squishy spot inside you that made you see double. “Cum for me, my little whore. Cum all over my cock, let that pretty pussy clench around me. Be a good girl.”

Everything around you went white and your ears began to ring as you came, your toes curling and back arching even further until you were sure you were going to snap in half. Your mouth was opened in a silent scream, letting your body succumb to everything your mate was giving to you.

The sight of you coming undone was enough for Eris to follow behind you, his mouth covering yours as he held himself still. It made his balls ache from how hard he was cumming, cursing loudly as he pulled away to bury himself into the crook of your neck.

“Take it, Y/N, fucking take it.” He growled into your neck. “Gods, you are so fucking tight on my cock.”

It took the both of you several minutes to catch your breath, Eris’s dick softening inside you as you struggled to come back to reality. He knew that this was rougher than normal, without any breaks, and he had probably pushed you to your limit. 

But he had no regrets. And neither did you.

You barely registered when he scooped you up and nuzzled you close to his chest, whispering sweet nothings as he carried you over to the bathroom. Eris knew he needed to clean you before you went to bed and while he was waiting for the bath to fill, he couldn’t stop himself from staring at your stomach and wondering if it stuck.

Either way, you two would definitely be doing this again. 

[grace-mint]

A Fate Worse Than Death- Part 2

TW: Angst, mentions of torture and SA. Let me know if I miss anything.

Y'all I am so ready for this happy ending. (Spoilers: it will have a happy ending bc I can't read angst without happy endings). Also sorry it's a bit short, but I couldn't keep going without it getting way too long.

Rhysand hadn’t slept in three days. He could hardly eat or drink anything. He couldn’t get himself to care for himself, his main priority being the female lying in front of him. As much as his family tried, they couldn’t get him to eat. Only when Amren walked in and called him a ‘pathetic bastard,’ and stubbornly refused to leave until he ate, did he indulge her.

He sat in a chair in the corner of his and y/n’s shared room, far enough away from the bed, but close enough to keep an extremely close eye on her. He had smelled another male on her, dread sitting in his lower chest at the idea of what that may mean. Azriel had quickly captured her father, brothers, and the male he smelled after they found her, unconscious, and had them in his cells at the Court of Nightmares. He couldn’t get the image of Y/N out of his head. Her body was covered in blood, her arms and legs bruised and scabbed up, and her back. Cauldron her back. It was completely wrecked. Her wings were gone. It broke him to know that she lost an extension of herself. As anxious as he was for her to wake, he was grateful for the time it gave Madja to attempt to heal it. She told him it would scar, severely. The trauma her back endured from whips and knives. The trauma of her wings being cut out, in lieu of the faebane that was running through her system, was enough for her back to heal quite slowly. Madja had said it would take several weeks, if not months potentially, to fully heal. Her mind, Madja told him, was another topic entirely. Rhysand had known this, he would never expect her to bounce back from something like this. He cursed himself. Since she left for that mission he had cursed himself. 

She was fine for a day or two, keeping him updated through their bond. The third day rolled around, and instead of getting his usual ‘Good morning, my love,’ greeting he was used to, he was only greeted by silence. He didn’t think too terribly much of it, assuming she was busy, but when evening had passed and still no word from her, he began to really worry. A pit of unease sat in his stomach all night. He had tossed and turned, debating whether he should leave for the camp to make sure she was okay. He had talked himself out of it, telling himself he was being overprotective, and that she could take care of herself. And she could, she was a fighter, the strongest person he’d ever met. 

He told himself this again and again as he sat there in agony, watching his mate, who lay still on the bed. A knock at the door broke him from his trance. He looked up to see Azriel walking in. Az took a long look at the bed, a shadow covering his face, before he looked at his High Lord. Rhysand knew he must look like a wreck. Rightfully so. His mate had just gone through hell. No. She had gone through something worse than that, and here he was sitting, perfectly healthy, when he did nothing to protect her. 

“You need to get some sleep,” Azriel said softly. He was a man of few words, only knowing when the situation warranted it or he felt comfortable enough. “She wouldn’t want you to sit here, torturing yourself over this.” 

As much as he didn't want to think it, he knew Azriel was right. How could he help her recover from this… What could he even call it? Situation? Ailment? No, this was something much worse. This was the equivalent of a lost life. It was an Illyrian’s worst fear; their wings are sacred to them, and the lowest form of insult bestowed upon their race is defilement of their wings. Only a true monster could do something like this. Anger flared in his chest again, the thousandth time in these past few days, at the thought of her father. Even his father, cold as he might have been, would never even have the thought of using one’s wings against an Illyrian. He wanted to kill her father so bad. Better yet, he wanted to rip him apart, limb by limb. And here was Azriel, having the audacity to tell him to rest?

“Shut up, Az.” Rhysand snapped. “She’s just lost everything precious to her, and you are telling me to relax??” 

Azriel didn’t even flinch at the tone of his voice, instead he walked over and placed a hand on Rhysand’s shoulder. “She didn’t lose everything precious to her. She still has you. Take a bath at least brother. You deserve it.”

Rhysand sat for a few hours after Az left, his mind running a thousand miles a minute. Finally, with a sigh, he got up and grabbed some spare clothes, walking into the washroom. The bath, as usual, was already filled with steaming water. He looked at himself in the mirror. He did look rough. His face was pale and gaunt, deep bags underneath my eyes, and in the eyes Rhysand looked broken. Taking off his shirt, summoning his wings, he stretched them out to their full length. Rhysand stayed there for several minutes, imagining how life would be without them. He couldn’t. His soul revolted at the idea of losing them, and he quickly let them disappear, the ache in his chest growing. He knew Y/N was going to suffer greatly, she already had. Running a hand down his face, he undressed and slipped into the tub. The warm water felt wonderful, but he didn’t allow himself to enjoy it. Rhysand cursed himself, he was wallowing in self-pity. He was the most powerful High Lord in existence, blessed with the most beautiful, most intelligent, and the most perfect mate to ever live, and yet he was still too weak. 

Rhysand scolded himself once again, how could he be so pitiful when his mate is laying on their bed, still not awake. He got up from the bath, quickly toweled himself off, and got dressed. He walked back into the bedroom, hoping you might be awake, only to have that squashed by seeing you still sleeping. 

He sat back down in the chair he’d been living in. He would stay by your side until you woke up. 

----Y/N POV----

Hands were touching me, everywhere. They were running through my hair, down my front, my rear. I was screaming, or at least I was trying to. No sound was getting out. Panic wracked my chest, I was going to die. I was going to die right now. The hands kept exploring, and they reached my wings. Pulling on my wings. Pain sparked in my back where my wings were attached by powerful tendons and membrane. I yanked away, trying to escape. Not my wings, I screamed, the words still not escaping my throat. I shot upright, the screams finally tearing from my throat. I quickly tucked my wings around me, seeking their comfort. The dream was terrifying and all I wanted to do was to turn over to my mate and tuck myself in his powerful arms. But as I went to tuck in my wings, terror struck my whole being. I couldn’t feel my wings. I looked over my shoulder and saw nothing. Another blood curdling scream left my throat. I threw myself out of bed, attempting to run to the bathroom, but I couldn’t make it. I fell, my body off balanced without the comforting and natural weight of my wings. 

“MY WINGS. MY WINGS ARE GONE.” I sat on the floor, sobs wracking my body, the pain in my back that I started to feel was agonizing. I was dying. That was the only possible answer. 

“Shhhh, my love. It’s okay I’m right here.” I felt a hand on my cheek. I flinched away, throwing myself as far as possible from the touch. 

“Go away! Leave me alone! Don’t take anything more from me!” Sobs broke through each of my words, the syllabus coming out choked and teary. 

Y/N, darling, it’s me, it's Rhys. I’m not going to hurt you. I’ll stay on the other side of the room, but you must calm down. A voice struck through my jumbled thoughts. Rhysand. That was my mate. Yes, I’m your mate. Rhysand. You are in Velaris, in the townhouse. We are in our bedroom. 

I look up, seeing my mate in a chair across the room, like he said. His eyes were frantic and wild. He looked pale and distressed. “Rhysand?” 

“Yes, my heart. I’m right here.” He slowly stood up, walking over to me. “Can I help you up?” 

I nod, not finding the energy to answer. He slowly and carefully, with attention to avoid the searing pain in my back, picked me up. I don’t know how he knew where it was so painful, but I was eternally thankful as he set me back on the bed.

“Rhys, my wings are gone.” My voice cracked with my words. “Someone took my wings.”

“I know, I know. I’m going to make them pay severely. Your father will die the slowest and most painful death. I swear it to you.”

At his words, the memories came rushing back. My father, my brothers, the male who used me. My head snapped up to my mate. “You need to leave.” His face fell, “Leave? No, I don't want to leave you. You’ve been passed out for nearly 3 weeks. I can’t leave.”

“Get out. Go, I don’t want to see you,” as I said the words, my heart roared in protest. I wanted him to stay, but he couldn’t. He can’t see me like this, weak and a failure. 

“Y/N, please.” He begged.

“I won’t ask again, leave.” I spat the last word out. I saw him flinch, and I wanted to leap up and beg for forgiveness, but what would he think if I told him what I let them do to me. 

Rhysand, begrudgingly left, reluctance to leave evident on his face. I felt awful for kicking him out, but I needed to be alone, for his sake and mine. 

I slowly stood up, wobbling, and tried to walk to the bathroom. I almost lost my balance, before deciding to just say screw it and lowered myself to the floor. I crawled to the bathroom, placing my hands on the counter, heaving myself up. The sight in the mirror shocked me to my core. My face was extremely sunken in, my body frail and bony, and my wings. The absence of my wings was devastating. It felt utterly wrong. I was wrong. 

I stared at myself in the mirror for a very long time; I hated every second of it, but I couldn’t bear to take my eyes away. A knock on the doorframe forced me to wrench my eyes away. There stood Cassian. His eyes full of sorrow and anger. 

“I heard you were awake and wanted to come check on you.” His voice was soft, as if talking to a frightened child. I just stared at him in silence, before turning my gaze back to the mirror. What was the point of life anymore? I was robbed of any dignity I had left. From now on my life be pitiful looks and watchful eyes from those who knew me. 

“Stop looking at me like that.” I say, without turning to look at him. “Stop it. Stop treating at me like I’m an object about to break.” 

“It’s okay to break, Y/N. None of us will blame you. Whatever you need or want, we will be by your side. If you want to wallow, we will be there. You want to yell and scream? We’re there to take the brunt of it. If you want to burn the world down? We will be there to light the matches.” His words went in one ear and out the other. 

I looked at him once again, with no emotion in my eyes. I saw his wings poking out from behind his back and jealousy reared its ugly head in my chest. “Leave. You think you can just come in here and flaunt your wings around and act all high and mighty. You are nothing more than a bastard who crawls at his High Lord’s feet.” 

There wasn’t a single part of my soul that believed the words I spit at him. In fact, I hated myself for saying them, but I wanted him to feel just a fraction of the eternal soul crushing pain I was feeling at the moment. Cassian’s expression didn’t waver at all though, instead he just tilted his head to look at me. 

“Is that the best you can do? That all you got?” He was goading me on, and I knew it. But this conversation had exhausted me enough. “Goodbye Casssian, “ I said in dismissal. I didn't bother to see if he left, I simply turned my head back to look at the mirror, to look at the ugliest creature in the world. Me. 

----Rhysand POV----

Cassian walked back into the kitchen, his face grim. “She called me a bastard, said I crawled at your feet.”

“She doesn’t mean it,“ Rhysand said, somewhat softly. He knew Cassian didn’t believe 

her, but he wanted to remind him.

“I know. Just hurts to see her like this.” Cassian and Y/N have always had a wonderful

relationship. He was able to be the older brother she never got to have. 

Rhysand poured another shot of whiskey, handing it to his brother. “She kicked me out. You should have seen her when she woke up. She was terrified. She was terrified of me.” His voice was broken. Pain seeping into his words.

“She just needs time.” He knew Cassian was right, but the ache in his chest was overwhelming at this point. Not to mention that the bond had gone numb on his mate’s side. He knew it would be bad, and he was expecting this, but he just didn’t know how to help her.  “She was looking at herself in the mirror when I was up there.”

Rhysand looked over at his brother, “Can I see?” Cassian nodded his approval as Rhysand entered his mind, finding the interaction between Cassian and Y/N. The lack of emotion in her eyes and face was the most heartbreaking thing he had ever seen. She was so gaunt and thin. She was a shell of herself. And Rhysand would stop at nothing to help her find her way home to him and his family.

[osarina]

honestly the most tragic relationship in civzai/pmreader universe is yosano & reader and i will stand on that hill forever.

like originally i was thinking maybe they only rarely interacted while on tokoyami island, but the more that i thought about it, the more i realized that they probably did interact frequently. mori would've wanted his "immortal regiment" as soon as possible and to have it perfected, he needed reader's ability to be able to "heal" the soldiers' minds. so mori would've likely had yosano try to help her figure out how to work her ability. they would have been friendly enough with each other, the only two young girls in the warzone, both dragged into this war in some manner or another, yosano probably saw her as a younger sister tbh being 3 years older, wanted to help her as best as she could.

and then mori does mori things. when yosano's help doesn't give him the progress he needs, he starts using other tactics to try to get her to develop her ability in the way he needs. starts comparing her to yosano, starts holding her place at his side over her head, threatens to send her back if she can't be useful. all things that a kid in her situation would be terrified of.

and like you guys have to understand pmreader does NOT have a reliable narration of those years. like we'll see it in the canonverse & the civzai verse (which is actually what stemmed this post), but her memories of those years are very warped courtesy of trauma & mori's manipulation. it all happens directly after she watches her entire village slaughtered in the crossfires of the great war so she's already very unstable, and mori gets in her head VERY quickly.

so she thinks back to these years and can only remember the threats of being dropped back off in the ruins of her village & the way mori held yosano as a type of idealized figure that she'd never be able to catch up to no matter how hard she tried. "be more useful like yosano and you can keep your place here" and stuff like that. she doesn't have like ANY memory of the months yosano spent trying to help her figure out her ability, doesn't remember how she would sit with her for hours and tell her that she's making good progress even when mori would give that disappointed frown, doesn't remember anything because its all been warped and twisted by moris' constant threats and comparison. so naturally she becomes resentful and hateful about it.

meanwhile, poor yosano only remembers the 7/8 year old girl she tried & failed to help, couldn't do anything when mori separated them and turned reader against yosano. yosano got off of the warfront and out from under mori's thumb, but reader didn't, and yosano has had so much guilt over it for years, living in the what ifs and wondering what ever happened to her.

and obviously mori's manipulations of reader never stopped after that—probably gets worse, even, because he would lament losing yosano while keeping reader, would've preferred the opposite. so when reader and yosano meet again years later, reader immediately rejects and spurns her, and yosano is just soooo distraught over it like the one person that could rlly truly fully understand her rejecting her in such a manner HURTS. hurts even more when she sees how reader has turned out so similar to mori bc she still remembers her as the kid she was and failed to protect.

i suppose while we're on the topic - i always get a lot of questions about reader and mori's relationship. dazai kind of mentions it in 'i laugh like me again,' but reader has like undying loyalty toward him that he definitely doesn't deserve. as shitty of one as he is, he's the only father figure she remembers, she still feels like she owes him her life for rescuing her from the warzone and has a VERY intense complex of trying to make him proud of her. i wouldn't say that mori doesn't care about her, he does in his own way, but whatever feelings he does have for her are overshadowed by his ambitions.

anyway tldr: yosano and reader are tragic, and mori is a cunt. i feel like im missing stuff concerning reader's and mori's relationship but that wasn't the point of this post anyway maybe ill make it its own post

[shadowqueenjude]

Didn't Rhys only kiss Feyre to protect her from Amarantha utm? I have only read the books once, so I could be wrong

OK so this is going to be a deep dive into all of Rhysand’s violations of Feyre specifically in book 1. Keep reading but be aware it’s long.

The first time Rhysand invades her mind is not even UTM but well before.

It is very clear that Feyre neither asked for it and enjoyed it, and before people say Rhysand was “playing a role,” this was completely unnecessary. He didn’t have to visit the Spring Court. Tamlin already thought he was the villain. And if Amarantha had ordered him to do so, he could’ve said some mean words to Tamlin and Lucien and been done with it. There is absolutely no reason to invade Feyre’s mind other than to delight in her terror.

Now let’s go to UTM.

Ok so basically if Feyre had given Rhysand her true name she would be dead at this point. And people argue “he was playing a role!” like…how? He could’ve just said her mind was like iron and impossible to penetrate. “Oh he was protecting her and knew she gave a false name!” no…he…didn’t? How tf would he know? And even if he somehow did know, he still gave that name to Amarantha knowing that it might be somebody close to Feyre and her family and got her ruthlessly tortured and killed.

Ok so why is he forcibly grabbing her arm and hurting her here? There’s no one here but them two. If Rhysand wanted to help Feyre, he could’ve revealed himself to Feyre here. Do you really think that Feyre would give away his double-agentry if it benefitted her? There. Was. No. Need. For. A. Fucking. Mask. HE LAUGHED.

Now another argument that I often see for twisting her arm is that it convinced her to agree to the healing that ultimately saved her life. But that is also wrong. Here it is pretty fucking obvious that Feyre was able to reason that for herself. Besides, it clearly wasn’t premeditated. He “lashed out,” meaning it was done in a moment of rage.

Also, he didn’t heal her out of the goodness of his heart or even to save himself from Amarantha. No, he wanted her, demanded her for two weeks out of every month. Why? To spite Tamlin, probably. He is OBSESSED with Tamlin. Look that in comparison to Lucien.

There was no reason to add that second screenshot that’s just me fangirling over Lucien (again). But the point is he healed her without asking for anything. Maybe you could argue he did for Tamlin, for himself, for Prythian, but he’s still miles ahead of Rhysand sooooooo… Ok the worst part...

Do you know what this means? That means the situation with the kiss only happened because RHYSAND sexually harassed Feyre by forcing her to wear extremely revealing clothes and coating her in this magic body paint. Otherwise how tf would Amarantha know that they kissed?????

Also Rhysand calling her his “belongings.” Uhhhhhh so what is that about hm?

“He was doing it to perform for Amarantha” bro not even Amarantha liked it💀💀💀 This was for him and him alone. He gained some sick pleasure from this.

Wow he's so bad at his role...Amarantha is sus

Now is this or is this not Rhysand invading Feyre’s mind and forcing her to drink the wine? Drug induced sexual assault.

My pookie bear Lulu checking on Feyre after she was SAed🥺👉👈

Ok anyway this is so unserious LOL. It’s so fucking obvious that SJM hastily went and edited this part when she decided that she wanted Rhysand to be endgame instead of Tamlin because she wanted it known that “Rhysand only touched her waist uwu!” Even if that was true, idc. He still violated her in countless ways.

If you want a plausible canon explanation, well Rhysand probably decided to manipulate her memory so that he said that it would smear if anybody touched it, including himself. Probably bc he realized it would be useful to have her on his side rather than otherwise (but he still wanted to have fun with her). Which offers the even more sinister idea that somebody besides Rhysand also touched her…

Also dude, why do you wanna rile Tamlin up so bad? Gay.

The fact that the sexual assault was supposed to be a clear contrast to the joy she felt with Tamlin and then SJM retconned it all and made it into a repetitive sexy moment in later books pisses me off.

LULU BABY LULU BABY LULU BABY LULU BABY LULU BABY LULU BABY LULU BABY LULU BABY LULU BABY LULU BABY LULU BABY LULU BABY LULU BABY LULU BABY LULU BABY LULU BABY LULU BABY

THE FACT THAT HE RISKED HIS LIFE FOR FEYRE AND GOT BEATEN FOR IT AND COULDN’T WALK FOR DAYS AND THEN AS SOON AS HE CAN EVEN THOUGH HE’S IN SO MUCH PAIN HE CRAWLS TO FEYRE’S CELL, STEALS A COAT FROM A GUARD TO GIVE TO HER, AND COMFORTS HER AFTER HER SEXUAL ASSAULT IS JUST SOOOOO AHHHHH HE’S MY LOYAL KING THIS FANDOM DOESN’T DESERVE YOU MY LOVE. RHYSAND COULD NEVER.

...ok this hurts.

WHY??? BECAUSE HE'S GAY, GIRL.

“He kept her from breaking entirely 🥺” ok he could’ve done that without forcing himself on her again. If you suggest that he had to “make her disgusted to keep her together” or some twisted bullshit I will jump you.

Ok maybe here he kissed her to “protect her,” but he already had her forcibly pinned to the wall, flirting with her when she obviously did not want him, and was actively violating her for weeks by dressing her up like a whore and forcing her to give him lap dances. So this situation is entirely his fault and I will not give him any mercy here.

Anyway I believe that’s the end of Rhysand’s violations of Feyre specifically for this book. But yeah. He only gets worse from book 2 onward.

[herejusttosufferalong]

Timeline Theory…

July 2022 S3 starts filming, tension between L&J as they spend more time apart and L grows closer with N (I think L also has long harbored feelings for N and therefore withdrawing from J/emotional cheating leading to J doing the same with her costar)

November 2022 L&J break up, but it is messy and takes time bc they were living together and there was an expectation of forever from J, she struggles to let go)

During Filming - N and L act out their feelings (literally) but most likely not off screen, however their friendship and bond grows tenfold, at some point N is filming Big Mood and Camilla likely tried to ground N and tell her to take some time away from L to see if the feelings are real

March 2023 - Filming wraps, N friend zones L and tries to push her feelings aside, tells him to go travel and live the single life post J breakup (in a later clip that Tif posted she expressed how happy she was for him that he was traveling)

*Side note: around this time R got together with S

HBS 2023 R influences L to go on Raya to find a girl similar to S that will jive with the group so they can go on couples trips together, meets A and they start a casual fling

Fall 2023 - L is not working and has lots of down time (guess who else does as well), spends time with his friend group and A, but my guess is that they rarely see each other one-on-one and it is more of a group dynamic, go on couples trips with R&S

Jan 2023 A wants to make things official, but L says the timing is off with him going on a long press tour, he promises to spend time with her when he can, bringing her on work trips when able (Paris, LA, etc.)

*Around this time N may have been dating E, but I’m still not convinced that’s true. I think they were just close friends.

Through the press tour L&N’s feeling resurface, but there is underlying tension because L is seeing A, even though L is not ready to make it an official relationship (hence N’s comment during the paddle game about being friends and hanging out alone being a “mixed message”)

NY Premiere - A surprises L and there is tension, he doesn’t want her there and there’s friction at the after party, but he ultimately is too nice and makes up for it the next day by taking her to the basketball game in place of his sister (who probably told him to)

Brazil - At this point I think L&N talk about their feelings and L is upfront that he can’t cut ties with A at the moment, he’s probably worried about how it would affect the friend group dynamic and he probably already promised to take A on the trips after the promo tour (Milan, LA, GQ), but continues to tell N it’s casual and they are friends with benefits (I find it hard to believe A didn’t flirt with other guys while L was away for 6 months), N understands and encourages him to talk to A about the situation

Break Period - L takes A to soho house as an apology for NY and they discuss the situation, L expresses his feelings for N and tells her he will still take her on the trips to help her with her career as a friend

Canada/Ireland - Feelings between L&N become real and they talk about it, decide to take things slow, L makes it seem he has wrapped up things with A and N believes him

London - I don’t think L arranged the pap walk, I think someone on his team did (same one who told A about Brazil) or possibly someone from A’s camp although I find that hard to believe because I feel he would have dropped A quickly if that was the case. I think L was unaware his relationship was under a microscope and brought her to Milan not realizing people would be desperate to get photos. N was probably upset that he brought her to Milan after the pap walk and her show of public support. I have a feeling she decided to shove her feelings back down to protect herself from being hurt and told L to go off and be with A and the TT was a way to get L’s attention and also to use humor to try to get fans to back off and think she was ok)

NYC - the next day N flies to NYC to talk to L in person and potentially meet with the Netflix/Shondaland team to talk strategy, N expresses to L that she can’t be caught up in a love triangle at this point because of the negative attention and press, and the team decides the best thing for L is to carry on with A as normal until things fizzle and the attention shifts, NDAs were probably signed and A was told not to post anything about L, but she is desperate for attention and so are Ls friends so they continue to cryptically send messages to the fans that they are with him.

At this point I think things are fizzling with L&A, and the planned commitments and travel have all passed, and they are taking space, hence the need for A to keep recycling old content. I think L misses N and is trying to focus on himself right now while trying to keep everyone happy so as not to cause unnecessary drama (hence liking As posts)

The friend group probably feels bad and is trying to hype A by commenting and posting about her to show that even though her and L may not be together she is still welcome. A is riding the fame wave by piggybacking off of N and L is probably unaware. I think he has notifs turned on for N & A but otherwise is staying off of social media for his mental health.

All I know is this whole thing is meSsY AF

.

[devilart2199-aibi]

IDW collection reading update! :D 📖 (Fixed!)

Phase 2 volume 4 done! This volume included: Monstrosity, RID issues 12-18 and MTMTE issues 14-16!

I ended up reading all the way to Phase 2 volume 6 before finishing this update so my notes are a bit scattered! Anyway! As usual my thoughts are below :3 ⤵️

Monstrosity:

This story is set in the past, when Optimus has assumed leadership on Cybertron after the senate and pervious primes were killed.

This story is, I dunno... For some reason I can't really get into these?? It feels... edgy?? Idk, I feel like that's not the best way to describe it. But there's something about the vibe with these ones in the past (like Autocracy and this one).

Of course everyone is becoming the characters we know since this is in the past. So there is going to be a lot of fumbling and growing from them and things that seem out of character. But given their situation at the time, i can't be super harsh on odd decisions.

They have to deal with the senate and their corruption, as well as that from the previous primes, the Decepticons uprising and wanting to take over, Cybertron running out of resources aaaaand I feel like something else I can't remember rn 🤔 but a lot is going on!! Haha.

There is a scene that references the OG animated movie where they toss Megatron out of Astrotrain and he goes "I still function...!" Which was a pretty cool homage tho.

But this kinda felt like a whole way to just show how badass Megs is meanwhile Optimus is going through it on Cybertron 😂 It was entertaining and interesting at parts, but some things I was 'eh' about

RID: 12-16:

Before i go on, I'm sorry, but... this Megs panel is giving me the same energy as that little alien guy that was in the news months ago 🤣 Now actually⤵️

Megatron returns!! This story was very entertaining!! I feel like I can usually guess where something is going, but I was surprised by a lot of the twists here! There was so many!

The character deaths had me shook! 😭 Wheeljack ahhhh!!! Metalhawk!! Also everything with Prowl and the Constructions! O_O;

I'm sorry Prowl 😔 I was pretty surprised when they started killing off the Decepticons at first, but then went: "Well, I guess he's being super ruthless now" I couldn't see you were brainwashed!! 😭🗿To my defense, him teaming up with Arcee and given Arcee's record, it kinda seemed like the natural progression of things lol 💀

Two things I kinda have mixed feelings about tho are:

1. Arcee just casually being part of the Decepticon gang and no one questioning her being there?? She then easily kills the guy controlling Devastator and that was like... Megatron's big plan. Why didn't she do it sooner? I imagine it was to draw out Meg's, but still it seemed weird.

2. Starscream killing Metalhawk after Metalhawk came to save Starscream. It's in his character and everything, and I'm happy that he did it bc it shows who he is. But OOF I thought he was leaning a different way for a bit and that I had Starscream wrong, But no, he's greedy boy. (I was starting to like Metalhawk T_T)

Anyway! Good guy Swindle!! 🥹

MTMTE 14-16:

💀💀💀💀💀 BIG SAD. But!!! It was a super interesting story!! I really enjoyed learning about Overlord and Chromedome.

Chromedome becoming Trepan's apprentice in the past was crazy!! :O And the whole scene with him and Prowl in Prowl's office. When Prowl asks/threatens Chromedome to go into Overlord's mind 😙👌 *chef's kiss* GET 'EM CHROMEDOME!! 💪👊🔪

The whole thing about how the Phase Sixers are made was very interesting too!! This frame ⤵️ Meg's saying this made me lmao 😂 I can now see the thing between him and Overlord better now.

As for Overlord getting out and obliterating some of the crew... ughhhhh 😭😭😭 Pipes man!! Ratchet protecting the medibay was awesome. Best doctor 🚑😌

I was shocked during the fight with Overlord that Magnus got so injured!! I've read ahead already, but I was sweating it, I thought he was gonna die too 😭😭 Overlord goes right for your spark man 💀

Luckily they got Overlord back to his containment cell, but- 😭😭😭😭 LITTLE MAN 😭😭😭 Why'd he have to hop in there to get the sword??? OTL

Then Chromedome blowing it up once the cell disengaged from the ship 😭 It was a perfectly painful sequence! 👏

When I saw the scene with Whirl and the cannon/ blaster shooting asteroids, I knew it would come around 😔

Also!! Learning that Chromedome has had other deep connections with bots (idk if Brainstorm meant Conjunx' specifically) and given them his innermost energon before and that's why he's dry!! Excuse me as I sob 🤧🤧🤧🤧😭😭😭😭 and then he makes himself forget!!! UGHH OTL My heart man!

The tape that Rewind made too!! 😭🤧

Drift taking one for the team too by getting banished 😔 he's a real one. Also pls come back.

RID 17-18:

We got more Shockwave lore here and I'm a big Shockwave enjoyer so I was very happy!! More heartache of course tho 😢

Him pitching/making the Jhiaxian academy of advanced technology is huge. Then all the experiments he did once he was turned purple 💀💀💀

Him going to Dai Atlas and injuring him before the attack on the senate so that he would escape death was a cool surprise. He's still in there ;_; ahhhh.

There is another story that happens in current time where Bee gets turned into Goldbug, but I think he's called "Goldfire" here? 🤔 He really got injured during the whole thing with Meg's so they had to fix him up with pieces of his old earth form.

It was cool to see included in the story :3

Final Random Thoughts:

This volume had a bunch of great stories in it! And I learned quite a bit about characters I like!

Though it was sad, I'd say my favorite story was the mtmte one with Overlord (The Overlord arc?). The art is always fantastic and so is the story!

I look forward to reading more and I'll be making another reading update very soon since I'm already on volume 6!

I didn't want to lump them all together bc I like using images as the story breaks and Tumblr only let's you use 10 per post 😔 Also... I ramble quite a lot haha, so 3 volumes worth would definitely be too much! 😂

Anyway! See you next time! 👋

[danikamariewrites]

hii i really love ur fics, ur so good at writing🤍🤍🤍🤍 I wanted to ask if i could request one where it’s cassian x reader and they’re in a lowkey relationship bc reader is rhysands sister. one day reader gets so turned on by watching cassian and forgets to shut her mental shields. Both feyre and rhysand hears every dirty thought ab what she wants cassian to do and rhys gets surprised and pissed and just literally wants to die😭😭👀

Personal Thoughts

Cassian x reader

A/n: thank you anon! I hope you like this

Warnings: slightly suggestive and some blood/violence

As you stretch by yourself as you watch Cassian and Azriel spar. You look to the other side of the room and see your brother and Feyre stretching together. You smile at how cute they are together. You hope one day you and Cassian will be like that.

Your relationship is still so new. You’ve only been dating for a few months now but you’re infatuated with each other. No one else knows and you two want to keep it that way for a while. Rhys can get a little to over protective of you and the rest of this family is so gods damn nosy. Honestly it’s a miracle no one knows yet.

Out of the corner of your eye you see Cassian staring at you. Mother forbid you take your eyes off of him for more than two seconds. You roll your eyes at him and he send you a small smirk as he slowly takes his shit off.

Cassian flexes and picks up his sword, spinning it a few times before taking a defensive stance in front of Azriel. Azriel forces Cassian to pivot. He flares his wings and his back muscles flex. You didn’t even know he could do that.

And his ass! His ass is so gods damned perfect you just want to squeeze it. You stare absentmindedly taking in the fight. All you can think about is your date last night. He took you out to dinner at a fancy restaurant and when you got home he absolutely ravished you.

His head was between your legs for what felt like hours. And he took his time exploring every inch of you. When you two were done Cassian drew a bath for the two of you. He treats you like the princess you are and shows you nothing but respect. Cassian truly is a gentleman which you think a lot of people over look.

As you keep going through your memories you feel a familiar presence. It’s Rhysand looking at your memories with you. Shit.

Before you can push him out Rhys pulls back. You look over at him and his face is crimson with anger. Clearly he didn’t take into account how happy you were with Cassian. And how dare he look into your personal thoughts without permission! He always asks.

Rhys runs at Cassian tackling him to the ground and pinning him. Azriel jumps back, confused by the situation unfolding in front of him. “Rhys what the hell-“ he’s cut off by Rhys’ fist. A crunching sounding from his nose.

You jump up and tackle Rhys off of Cassian. “Those were my private thoughts! What the fuck is wrong with you?” You scream in your brothers face. “I wish I could burn my eyes after seeing that shit!” “Oh grow up you big baby!” You start to fight Rhys. His mistake is that he doesn’t take you seriously and you land a few good punches before Cassian picks you up and pins your arms.

Azriel holds Rhys back while Feyre stands to the side with her hands held out in both directions. Rhys gives Cassian a death glare. “Are you serious? My sister?” You look at Cassian and he goes slightly pale. “While you were intruding did you not feel my happiness? All the joy he brings me?”

Rhys’ jaw works as he tries to hold in his anger. “Rhysand.” Feyre says sternly. “Apologize to your sister. That was so wrong.” His face softens when he looks at her. You can tell they’re speaking mind-to-mind the way his expression changes.

“Look again Rhys.” You snap. You let him in and show him the overwhelming joy of being with Cassian. The love that he gives you everyday. Cassian lets go of you, confident you won’t try to beat your brother again. “Cassian,” his head snaps toward Rhys, “if you hurt her I’m going to kill you.” He nods, “I would never do that. I love her too much.”

You stand there stunned, looking up at his bloody face. “I love you too.” The words just flow from your mouth without even thinking. You hadn’t said that to each other yet. You smile at him and rise to kiss his cheek. Cassian smiles back at you, reaching out to hold your hand.

You hear Rhys make a fake puking sound. “Hey I don’t do that to you and Feyre.” “Feyre’s not your sister.” You stick your tongue at him. “I’m happy for you two.” Feyre says with a smile. “And don’t listen to your brother, he’ll come around soon.”

“I’m sorry.” Rhys says in your mind. “Yeah, yeah just don’t do it again or I’ll snap your wrists.” “Ouch. Are you this violent with Cassian?”

Azriel, Rhys, and Feyre head inside and you turn to Cassian. “Oh baby, your nose. Let’s get you cleaned up.” Cassian rubbed at the dried blood caked in his nose, “I’m fine sweetheart. You don’t have to take care of me.” You roll your eyes and pull him toward the door. “You’re taking a bath. And I’ll even rub your shoulders like you like.” Your tone slightly teasing.

Cassian kisses the top of your head. “You know now that I’m thinking about it, I’m so sore from training and Rhys beating me up. I might need more than a shoulder rub.” He smirks at you.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Am I the asshole for giving a random guy my friend's phone number?

(🍫📲 to find later)

I (22 NB/F) was working one day at my place of work by going around and putting various items for sale where they belong in the store, as well as taking out the recycling. As I was making my way up to the front of the store so I could go to break, this older gentleman needed help reaching something. I helped him pull it down, but before I continued I was stopped by this other kid. He had a healthy-looking emo haircut and wardrobe, so I didn't think too much about it at the time. I kid you not, his eyes were big and wide like some kind of bishounen anime (idk if I spelled that right). Literally looked straight out of one almost, he reminded me of an excited puppy too.

"Hello! Do you need help with something?"

"Uh- actually, I was wondering if I could have your Snapchat?"

I was completely gobsmacked.

"Uh- I don't have a snap chat." A lie, but only because my snap is exclusively for my BFFEAE (Best Friend For Ever And Ever). I don't pass it out to my coworkers, family, or any other friends. Just her.

"Can I have your number then?"

Usually guys don't like. Spend this long on me. I'm Demiromantic and Asexual, and for those who don't know, that means I have no interest in having sex with anyone and have no interest in dating anyone but close friends. I never thought I'd be in this situation. Ever. The idea of anyone asking me out of the fucking blue for this is so far out of left field for my expectations that I was just staring awkwardly at him for a moment.

"... unless... age is an issue?"

"Ah- no, I am 22, but I'm just not interested in a relationship right now."

And it's the truth, honestly. My mental health has been a rollercoaster of emotions and schedules that I've been struggling to maintain for months. I did have one at the beginning of the year, but dropped it because I realized I couldn't trust my lover (he was extremely conservative, and I had to hide a lot of my life from him, but it was nice while it lasted honestly. Broke up on good terms).

"That's okay. Maybe we can just hang out sometime or something."

I'll be honest, I haven't been in good health to try a brand new friendship with a complete stranger either (I have horrid social anxiety to the point where I am basically a shit in hermit, and with everything going on in my life I don't think I can handle pushing my anxiety well).

Now, years ago, when me and my BFFEAE first moved to different states, we agreed that we could use each other's phone numbers to give out if we couldn't handle it or just wanted the guy to leave us alone. We have each other permission to pretend to be each other for it, that way they're more likely to listen thinking it's you saying "no thanks" instead of her friend saying "get off her back".

So in the span of ten seconds, because this kid was really sweet and I was still pretty shocked this was even happening, I was giving my friend's number to this sparkly-eyed kid (idk how old he was but I assumed he was younger than me, that's just my natural assumption honestly) and continued on with my work day. I told him a semi-common nickname of mine instead of my actual name bc my name is hard to spell and I didn't feel like putting much time into it.

Of course, immediately after I called my friend up and left her a message saying I passed her to this really sweet kid and to be kind with him (she's a protective mama bear kind of person) but that I simply wasn't interested and didn't have the right mindspace for a new anything.

Fast forward to when I get off work and check in with my friend, she and the kid had been chatting back and forth. Apparently he was into drugs (I have sensory issues and can't handle that kind of thing, so I feel like I've actually dodged a bullet) but was getting along really well with her otherwise. We got chatting about it when I confirmed that I'm not open to hanging out with him and that as long as she's kind and doesn't try to set me up with him or anything, I'm fine with her discussing whatever with him.

"I get it girl, we all get like that for a time. I'll keep it away from ya.

By the way, he thought you gave him a random number. He was SOO excited when I responded as you lol"

I felt absolutely sick and was horrified. I figured he would have been like "sick", but apparently he had been like "FUCK YEAH". I feel horrible for deceiving him like this, but I genuinely am in no spot where I can mentally handle picking up a new friendship, much less a romantic relationship. It doesn't help that he genuinely caught me off guard, and passing him her number was my first response to handling it.

Am I the asshole for doing this?

What are these acronyms?

[minho-hoho]

Yandere!ENHYPEN's reaction to their S/O slapping them

genre... yandere! pairing... yandere!enhypen x gn!reader! warning... cursing, yandere themes and behaviour, violence, small caps intended etc...! wc...1.7k! note... yall, no month has ever been so hectic im so sorry, like ive been trying to deal with my feelings (not abt tumblr, for the first time ever im starting to like someone sooo) and i got sick (again, yes im sick every two weeks) bedridden, and still am but its okay. just idk now expect more fluff since im more in a lovey stage bc of that little someone :>!

MASTERLIST

이 희승 Lee Heeseung

it all started after a heated argument about you not being able to go out with some of your friends

you were starting to get really annoyed and angry at your boyfriend's over-the-counter possessiveness and protectiveness

you just wanted to go outside and enjoy yourself, without him for once

it was basically a yelling match and you were starting to get seriously frustrated by the situation

suddenly, you felt your body move by itself

and in a fit of rage, your hand flew to Heeseung's face

it didn't hit you immediately, you were so enraged you didn't notice the shock and disbelief on Heeseung's face

you were breathing heavily and tried to calm yourself down. to you, the world had stopped for minute, you clearly weren't aware of your surroundings

but Heeseung made sure to snap you back to reality with his livid voice

“what the fuck did you just do?”

“what? it's nowhere near as bad as anything you've done to me anyways” you retorted, still on your high

he threw a death glare your way, that you didn't even notice

“i think that someone here” he came closer to you and looked down at you “needs to be taught a lesson”

and just like that, you were dragged to a dreaded place, still seeing red

박 제이 Park Jay

to be honest, you didn't how did you get so far in an argument

you should have already been locked up, but yet you weren't, you were here, screaming your lungs out, tears rolling down your cheeks, trying to put some sense into your psychotic “boyfriend”

at this point, you couldn't even remember what you were originally arguing about, you were basically buying time before getting locked up

but the more you argued, the madder you got

you wanted Jay to get a taste of his own medicine so bad, even if it was just a little, even if the consequences could be almost deadly

you wanted to hit on his ego, to feel even tiny bit embarrassed to be treated in such a way

you were quite weak, but you took all the remaining strength in your body and gave him the biggest slap

the sound of your hand on his face resonated through the whole house, and what you felt like pmmthe whole universe

it felt good, but you now knew, that there was no buying time anymore

you were doomed, and you knew it too well, but you were at a point where you were just waiting for him to end you by inadvertence

Jay forcefully pushed you onto the ground and took a few seconds to take a look at you

he took your leg and dragged you across the floor and stairs to the basement not even taking a look at your suffering self

he couldn't care less, all he saw was rage and madness, he couldn't believe how bold you were and made sure to teach you and unforgettable lesson

심 제이크 Sim Jake

you didn't even remember the last time you argued with Jake

it was always pretty sweet with him, but only recently you started to take notice of the manipulation

you started to notice how the way he treated you was far from normal, and it was rapidly but carefully bulding in you anger and resentment towards Jake, who didn't really notice the subtle changes in your behaviour

it was after him begging for you two to not go out on a date that you lost it

you started screaming right at his face and pouring all the contents of your heart on him, insults after insults were thrown, taking him aback

but he still got the situation under control, he knew you very well, and this outbursts of yours was going to end in his favour

again, he used his best technique, manipulation. he tried, but despite his best efforts, you saw right through it

and you managed to get even more enraged, if that was even possible

you took angry steps towards Jake and waste a second to slap him harshly

a wave of anger came over Jake, but he knew better to act put of anger. the last thing he'd ever was to appear as the bad guy

he was going to use your act to victimise himself and make YOU the bad guy

and that's how he put you back into your place, and filled you with immeasurable guilt

박 성훈 Park Sunghoon

you usually always tip-toed when you were with Sunghoon, which was all the time

but being with such a person lead to built up frustration and anger, that you always made sure to never unleash onto him, knowing damn well that he wasn't going to spend a single second trying to understand you

but today was different, nothing seemed to go your way, everything seemed like it was trying to push your buttons further and Sunghoon was no exception

everything he did seemed to bug you more than usual, and today was not the day you were up to deal with his quite annoying teasing

you tried to tell him to stop, but he didn't want to listen driving you crazier

after another remark from him, your body started dmoving on its own and you slapped his face with all of your strength

your eyes widened before his did, and before he could even compute your bold act, apologies started spilling our of your mouth, tears already forming in your eyes

but to your surprise, Sunghoon just started laughing, his laugh getting crazier by the second, scaring you but nevertheless, you kept the apologies coming until they almost made no sense

“shut up” and you immediately did, he then grabbed your hair and dragged you too your room

“you've gotten so bold and mean and for what?” he shook his head “i've done nothing but be nice and you repay me like this?” he tugged at your hair harshly as you were struggling on the floor

“i guess i should have known better, you are a brat after all. i hope that what you'll be going be through today will be enough for you to finally understand.” he took a look at your pitiful figure “not like i mind pushing you anyways”

김 선우 Kim Sunoo

where did this rage even come from? maybe it was from being locked away from the world, trapped with someone you absolutely loathed. who knew, what mattered was the fact that Sunoo's clingy behaviour was greatly pissing you off

his recent jealousy was way more overbearing these days, and you couldn't stand him being attached to your hip after acting in such deranged ways.

hell, everything he did seemed to piss you off in some ways and you told him multiple times but you were met with a pouting Sunoo which irked you even more

but this time it was too much

your head was hurting and the lats thing you needed was Sunoo yelling at you for a reason you didn't even know, you assumed it was because of his jealousy

you argued back, todl him to shut up repeatedly but to no avail, it only angered him more

and that's when you did it

you slapped him, you could say goodbye to your head because he was now screaming his head off and you of course, received a slap back

all you could do was sob uncontrollably on the floor, begging for all the screaming to stop

양 정원 Yang Jungwon

the only reason an argument with Jungwon got so far, was only because he found it entertaining to see you so engaged as if you were going to change his mind, he found you quite adorable like that

but now he had enough of seeing you scream, he did prefer seeing you docile and calm, and he would be lying if he didn't want his peace and quiet

after some eye rolling, he told you off, having not listened to anything you've said, not really caring

“did you even listen to me at all?” you said angrily, Jungwon smirked

“of course not, why would i?” he laughed “now just shut up before i get angry”

you were boiling inside, you felt frustrated, could nothing get through his head? if words didn't, maybe actions would

and right then and there, you slapped him, not with much force, you just wanted to get your point across

but if he was feeling nice earlier, he sure wasn't now

he didn't plan on punishing you today, but now, to him at least, it was the only option left

“i tried being nice with you but i guess you didn't get the memo, hm?” without leaving you the chance to answer he grabbed your arm and brought his face close to yours

“i suppose violence is the only way you can understand who's in control”

西村 力 Nishimura Riki

you two were passionately arguing as always

spitting venom at each other, fighting your sides for your dear lives, too stubborn to stop and apologise

you didn't even remember why you were arguing, you were just arguing to argue, in your minds, there was no way you were going to lose this battle

red with rage, you couldn't help but get even angrier seeing Riki shooting daggers at you

it only drove you further in you indignation and furor

you knew how he pushed every single one of your buttons, and this was the last straw

insulting your loved ones, especially after taking you away from them, was just too much for you to bear

the second your processed his words your hand flew across the room to his face, leaving a huge mark on his cheek

“i guess this shuts you up, huh?” you said snarkily, still riding your high seeing Riki mouth wide opened

“okay i don't where the fuck did you get your confidence from, but know that i'm going to make you pay for this” now your eyes widened and gulped as you heard him speak

he pulled your hair to bring you closer to him before speaking in your ear

“i'm going to make sure you won't ever use these hands of yours in such ways”

PERM TAG LIST! : @stacey-stonem, @sh1mzu, @axartia, @echantedrose, @leeknowbuttsmasher, @nikipedia07, @deafeningballoonnacho, @sristsblog

[alexxncl]

who fell first, who fell harder (dateables + thirteen)

no luke bc he's a baby

(yes i have favorites, thirteen is one of them)

OG AND NB SPOILERS

masterlist | more drabbles/hcs | brothers edition

dia

dia did both, fight me

when he met solomon, it was purely childlike wonder

mc on the other hand, there was something about them that piqued his interest

despite being so much less powerful than him, they treated him as if they were equals, poking fun at his naivety, joking with him, pushing him to open up when they knew something was wrong

he always had a profound interest in humanity, but was forbidden to act on it due to his father's overprotectiveness (fuck the demon king fr /hj)

they always encouraged his curious spirit, to barbatos' displeasure, but sometimes they managed to convince barbie to join them on whatever adventure dia had planned under the guise of needing protection

they were overhwelmingly open with him, gravitating towards his castle when they had a bad day, and he later found himself doing the same when barbatos and luci weren't around

they read him better than barb and luci combined on most days

he always thought about them on his business and personal excursions, making sure to pick up souvenirs that reminded him of them just so see their eyes light up when he gifted them to them

they made him feel like his dreams were worthwhile, like he'd been able to live up to both his father's and an entire kingdom's expectations of him

how could a simple human make him feel like the weight of the world was off if his shoulders with something as small as a smile?

mc begun to realize that no matter how busy he was, he'd always find a way to make time for them

whether it was in his room, on a phone call, over text, he'd always check in on them to see how they were doing

they always noticed how much he struggled with his position, wanting the best for everyone even if it meant digging himself into a hole

they'd always ask him when he'd get back from his trips, waiting in his room to surprise him with sweets or tea and a movie

the sleepovers happened more often after the lesson 16 incident, he didn't want them staying at the HOL even under the brothers' protection, he was less paranoid if they were within arm's reach

one night, he got back later than expected and found mc curled up in his bed in their nightclothes, and he realized how turly in love with him he was

when both of them woke up the next morning, mc was beyond apologetic for falling asleep and taking up too much space and -

he kissed them and confessed right after

this was a month or so before they left the devildom

barb

mc fell first, barb fell harder

mc didn't like him all that much at first, he was always so secretive and elusive to every question they asked him

why couldn't he just be normal?

they spent as much time as they could around him, trying to catch him at his weakest point so they could pry answers out of him

spending so much time around someone will force you to pick up on the smallest details

how even in the worst situations, he puts on a smile

how his eye bags continued to get worse and worse weeks into the semester

how after dia's trips he'd be more likely to doze off in class

how he'd hide his physical and mental pain from everyone, so well that even luci and dia rarely picked up on it

regardless of his bad days, mc still pestered him with questions about his powers, about how he met solomon, about why they of all people were chosen for the program, all while asking questions about what he liked and disliked, what his favorite color was

they started bringing snacks and energy drinks to classes they shared with him

whenever they went shopping, they bought him gifts related to what he'd tell them

they slowly started opening up about why they were so curious, feeling like they didn't belong or weren't good enough to succeed at the school

then, he caught a glimpse of their death

he'd grown close to the human, the thought of losing them was almost unbearable

their bright smile, the way they supported the young master, their intelligence, hell, even their endless questions about him and his history

he vowed never to interfere with the timeline for personal gain, but mc was too important for him to lose

after sending them back, he'd talked to his past self about why they were so important, why a human with a life as small and insignificant as theirs had ended up meaning to much to him in such a short amount of time

he'd make sure nothing like this would ever happen to them again, insisting on escorting both dia and mc to school every day

diavolo, despite barbatos' best attempts at hiding it, noticed how much he'd grown to care for the human and insisted that if barbatos didn't tell them how he felt, he'd do it himself

the confession happened a few days before mc left the devildom, they were sitting in his room with the newest tea from the human realm when he told him how he felt

"i know, i was just waiting for you to make a move"

they're still as insufferable as the day they fell to the devildom, but he loved them nonetheless

solomon

solomon fell first, mc fell harder

there's a reason he took them on as his apprentice

he saw how close they were with the brothers, how easily they made pacts with them despite knowing them for not even half as long

they'd all felt mc's aura, it almost matched his own

he'd never met someone as optimistic about such a multidimensional situation, being thrust into a world where you were nothing but food to those around you

solomon was there when their happy-go-lucky act about the devildom started to show its cracks

he saw the homesick look in their eyes every time they walked through the devildom streets, strolling through the halls, walking to their room in the HOL

he hated how much it reminded him of himself, he wanted to be there for them

he was the only other human in the devildom after all, they had to be close

he'd conjure up cityscapes, sneak up to the human realm late at night to bring them gifts from their hometown, ask them their favorite recipes (for some reason, he always had to pry those answers out of them)

whenever mc missed home, they'd walk over to purgatory hall and knock on his door, sometimes tearfully wishing they could go home, even with no family to greet them

they'd tried to help him cook, but even their guidance could barely salvage whatever mess he ended up creating in the kitchen

they begged him to teach them spells, to take them under his wing, and even to learn how to become immortal after growing more accustomed to the devildom since the thought of leaving their family behind hurt too much to think about

they didn't want to leave him behind

they'd do anything in their power to stay with him as long as possible, even if it meant pestering him and barbatos about his immortality endlessly

solomon's confession was far from planned, they were back in the human realm having a picnic in the park, reminiscing on all the adventures they had in the devildom

mc talked about how scared they were at the thought of death, and how close they were to experiencing it after the lesson 16 incident

they never expected him to fall for someone with a life so short in comparison to his, someone who could be nothing but a memory if an enemy's cards were played right

the way he held their hand and told them he loved them, it would've been impossible not to feel the same

simeon

simeon did both

contrary to (somewhat) popular belief, the religious guilt he felt due to his status wasn't bad at all

he'd already been demoted from seraph to archangel

what would a little admiration for a human do?

even after the admiration turned to love, turned to desire, turned to lust, he still couldn't bring himself to care about the possibility of being cast out due to his emotions

hell, he would've been cast out sooner if he wasn't so scared to fall before the celestial war

mc is everything he dreamed of having, and then some

their eyes, their smile, the way they carried themself with so much integrity and the way their heart constantly overflowed with love for all of those around them

he wondered how much of that love was for him, how many other emotions they felt towards him

they were always so patient with him, they took such good care of luke, they made lucifer and his brothers happier than they'd been in centuries, happier than they ever were in the celestial realm

could he be happy, too? was loving them all it took for him to find true happiness?

mc took a liking to the angel from the moment they'd met him

he was a far cry from whatever image of an angel they'd had in their head, especially considering their religious upbringing

prim and proper of course, buy willing to indulge in the sins the brothers were so well known for, whether it be for his own personal gain, for luke, or, surprisingly, for them

he was always prideful when mc came to him for help or advice

he was greedy for their time and envious of those who spent too much with them, never having his fill

the silent wrath held towards belphegor after he mercilessly tried to take mc away from their family, from him

how he'd spend hours in bed hoping to dream of them

how when they kissed for the first time, it left them breathless and weak in the knees at the thought of him seeing them in that light

to them, he was the embodiment of everything they'd ever wanted

to him, they were his refuge, a home he'd gladly return to after his fall from grace

they taught him everything he needed to know about humanity, about being

thirteeen

mc did both

they'd always had a thing for intelligence

walking through the reaper's cave made them want to meet her, despite solomon advising against it

when they finally did meet her, the first thing they noticed about her was how pretty her eyes were

ofc they tried flirting, but none of their attempts worked

regardless of how she felt about them, they always wanted to learn more about her

they asked how old she was, how different the other world was from the devildom, if she could show them around

they hoped they weren't annoying her

she was harder to read than the rest of the brothers, but they'd broken down tsundere acts before so it wasn't anything new

they went out of their way to cross paths with her whenever they walked to class, they sat next to her at lunch to ask her how her day was

they asked about her traps and loved the way her whole demeanor changed when she got passionate about her ideas and creations

they started noticing small details, like how she clicked her pencil in time with the clock when class was almost over

how she had a soft side for luke despite scaring the shit out of him during their first meeting

how she was always so careful around mc, like they'd break if she pushed them too hard

how whenever she was overwhelmed, she'd play with the chains on her clothes because having something cool in her hands calmed her down

how despite claiming to hate solomon's guts, she was just frustrated that she couldn't get her hands on his soul

how pretty her lips looked when she smiled

she started opening up to mc as the semester went on, talking about her history with all three realms

how she was there when lilith died

how she was there when solomon was supposed to die

how she was there when mc's candle burnt out

how distraught she was when mc chose to pour some of their candle into beel's, wondering why someone with a life as fragile as theirs would sacrifice something so precious

she wanted mc to care for her the way they cared for the brothers, for the angels, for solomon

she started answering more and more of mc's questions

she started letting mc walk her home, and eventually showed them the ins and outs of the cave

the fountain of knowledge became their safe haven, free from the eyes of those who would give thirteen sideways glances when she walked hand-in-hand with the best friend of the seven rulers of hell

thirteen was talking about how she was tasked with carrying solomon's soul to the otherworld once he died, how she felt like a failure for not being able to do so, when she noticed mc with a sad smile look on their face

they told her nothing in the world would've made her anything but perfect in their eyes, even if she had no choice but to let their candle burn out

she asked mc what else was up, the sad smile being replaced with a more content expression

"nothing, just thinking about how much i love you"

she wanted to bolt right then and there

why did that make her feel funny?

love? of all the words they could've said, they loved her?

falling in love with death, the irony of it all, thirteen would give anything to keep that smile on mc's face

(even if it meant sneakily pouring bits of solomon's candle onto mc's behind her family's back)

[fieldsofbats]

simon riley x waitstaff!reader

thank you to those who liked my first post <3 i am still v new to this and haven't quite figured out my preferred writing style so all feedback is welcome (be respectful tho).

part one

part two

right so at ur work it’s real common to have military folk there bc it is a military town, close to base, training facilities etc. 

first visit was just to the bar section of the place. price thought it would be good for moral to go out and have some chill team time, watch a football match and just hang out.

soap ordered some food and you brought it over to them. simon did not notice you bc he was watching the game, but then he got a whiff of soaps food and decided to grab something.

cue you coming back over with your sweet smile and handing him his food and cutlery before wandering back to the resturant bc its a quiet night.

mans is hooked.

second time ghost comes in it’s at night again but the restaurant is slammed bc it’s family week, everyone is getting dinner the night before they gotta head home. 

lbr, simon didnt think about you until soap wanted to go out again: "where are we goin'" "that place with the pretty server", knows exactly where they are going.

but still, your smile and warmth towards everyone is so kind and customer service is through the roof. yet he watches as you race around in and out of the kitchen with crazy ease and grace

like dude is impressed at you staying calm and steady despite how fuckin busy it is and people with their insane requests and demands for food (inpatient pricks)

he wants to stick around and watch u but it has become way to loud and busy for him so he bows out and goes back to his quiet room

simon strikes me as someone that likes to have as much regularity in his life as possible, why do you think 141 are literally the only people he has relationships with???

but mainly forms this routine bc he gets to see you, and he knows you will be there bc you’ve old him its your regular shift.

"you basically live here."

"haha no, i just make sure i get the shift with you."

the restaurant would make the booking for him in advance cause he never does but you know he is coming anyway so have it under ‘y/n's man’ (hasn’t told you his name) and ur coworkers think its super cute and funny

but he would make the effort to come in when it is quiet and has the chance to actually listen to you talk and see you interact with others on a more relaxed level BUT he wouldn’t be opposed to seeing you rushing around tables and weaving between guests who haven’t sat down

ngl he would find it hot watching you manage several orders and memorising different peoples requirements, all while keeping that sweet smile and polite manner

you can carry three plates?! this man is sweating under the mask

he doesn’t do a lot of the talking, only when you really prompt him or he is feeling a bit more extroverted that day. Doesn’t wanna talk about military shit with you but that’s all he does so he prefers to listen to you.

knows all the drama and gossip of the restaurant. glad to hear you are not dating the guy behind the bar and that you also don't like the receptionist because he perfume is to strong.

he will hang around and wait for it to die down to be able to talk to you. if it gets too loud for him he might just try and see you at the till as he leaves but has pushed through once or twice to talk to you.

something about you makes him feel more real, that he isn’t just some shell of a man, that he has a purpose. he likes that you treat him normally, the fresh slate you give him is like clean evening air.

ANYWAY it would take him ages to ask you out, like more than six/ seven months, and he would be so nervous (not to the point of stuttering or shaking bc this man is military he has been in worse situations, but his heart would be running a marathon and the self doubt would be just as loud)

but also protective ghost omgggg, he would be seething watching the old men be creepy and shit

knife and fork are down and he is up behind these men leering over them “excuse me, I just have a question about my meal.” just would say anything to get you out of that situation and back over to him. Or would just stand by the register staring down these men (this happens a lot more often than simon would like to admit)

always checks in when he is leaving to make sure he didn’t over step or make you uncomfortable by accident

[clangenrising]

i think the hate comes from the fact she still does try to justify/excuse Razor, despite hearing from many cats how horrible he was to them. like we know he is an abuser and a rapist. she thinks it's bizarre/odd/whatever that his rape victim (Scorch) calls the idea of him being sweet and caring 'nightmarish'. brother or not, he is emotional, physical and sexual abuser, and she still seems to find it weird that cats dont… tolerate him in the slightest. that does rubs as rape/abuse apologism bc 'he was nice to ME and he is MY FAMILY, he would NEVER do something like that..' soo many irl families have sadly ('no way my son could had possibly violated someone. this bitch is clearly lying and trying to ruin our family' type of shit you know)

like yeah having to live for months with people (cats) who killed your family member celebrated it is harsh, i do give her that ofc. on top of her kitten crash and being more or less forced to tend them or else, and she is in no good shape to properly accept and internalize the Shadow Truth. but many people irl dealt with people like her, trying to bend over and backwards to justify their family members and friends, even after coming in contact with those who were deeply hurt by them.

That is a good point, I see where you're coming from. Clearly you've been very hurt by this kind of thing in the past and I hope nothing I've done made you feel more hurt.

I was just surprised because Mystique isn't like, for example, a parent who makes excuses for a son who has been accused of sexual assault and insists that he's totally innocent despite evidence to the contrary. She's a victim too, even if she was never physically or sexually assaulted by Razor. All of her denials aren't meant to hurt the victims or protect Razor, they're to protect herself from the terrifying reality of her situation. Does that make what she did right? No, and I don't think I've ever said that, but I do think it makes it less deplorable.

As well, its not like Scorch has told her "he assaulted me." Scorch is VERY private and so that stuff isn't public knowledge. I feel like there might be some projection on to her because of information the audience has that she doesn't. As far as killing Smokyrose, that was framed to the city cats as a casualty of war, not the murder of a peace negotiator, and to her is similar to if say, Razor were a cop who shot somebody. We obviously would find that terrible but from her conservative point of view that's just his job, to protect the city from dangerous cats with lethal force if necessary. When she got to the Clans that became more complicated for her and she's hasn't ever once claimed Razor was in the right to kill her.

What she did ask for was that the fight be solved peacefully. As far as she knows, the Clans are blowing Razor's actions out of proportion and jumping to killing him when there could have been a different solution. Like, imagine if you went to a village and everyone there was like "your brother is an evil murderer" and then failed to present you with any substantial evidence. Who would you want to believe, the strangers ready to kill him or your brother who has only ever been good to you and everyone you know (or at least, you've rationalized his behavior to believe that's the truth, lied to your self enough that you believe it)?

This isn't to trivialize what you went through or excuse real life cases of people who deny heinous acts. This is simply to say, I feel like anyone who hates Mystique isn't engaging with the entirety of the story I'm telling. I understand, though, that this could be because of a defensive reaction and I don't mean to put any blame on someone who might be feeling that way. This is a complicated topic and its possible for neither party to be the bad guy in this situation.