#and it’s better to do it and move on than obsess o er what could be

[cherrysnax]

the webcomic scene growing and thriving is great and all but god damn it’s like every comic has to be like. 100% professional now, I remember when I first got into webcomics things were like allowed to be goofy for like the first 200 or so pages, nowadays it’s like… I’ll see ppl start their comic and produce massive illustrations every single panel and then they just stop because they’ve burnt themselves out trying to match art standards made by people with teams and a bunch of money

[h3art-n-s0ul]

Grocery Shopping Together part 3

Ushijima, Daichi, Hinata

Genre: Fluff

(Please feel free to reblog and comment)

Part 1 and Part 2

This will be the final part but please leave any requests for any fics or hc's you want to see!

___________________________

Ushijima: Stands in the grocery line for you while you go eat samples

-The patience this man has

-Just wants you to be happy

-Definitely lets you buy whatever you want

-Just obsessed with your smile

-Chivalry isn't dead

-He makes waiting in line a good time

The line was honestly incredible. Unnatural.

“Woah.” You stared in disbelief. The two staff members looked so panicked and you swore you’d never seen a human being move so quickly. Well, at scanning items. The rapid beeping was so consistent, you couldn’t keep up.

“Y/n?” Your boyfriend brought you out of your dazed stupor.

“O-oh. Sorry, I was distracted. Toshi, what are we going to do? It’ll take an eternity to get through this line.” You crossed your arms and huffed.

“It’s alright love. I’m sure it’ll go faster than you think.” His towering figure inclined toward you and he tilted your chin upward.

“And of course you make it bearable.” You smiled when he kissed your forehead.

“Hey, they have a ton of free samples in the back of the store,” He pointed. “How about, you go and try some?”

“But Ushi, our stuff…” You looked downward.

“I’ll stay in line Y/n. It’s fine, lovely.” He dropped his hand to squeeze yours.

“Really? Thank you so much! Love you! I’ll be right back!” You reassured him and ran towards the samples. When you were out of sight, Ushijima couldn’t help the smile that creeped onto his features. You were so damn cute. He would die just to see you all ecstatic again.

A few minutes later you returned with a tiny paper plate, filled with snacks sitting at the ends of toothpicks.

“Here Toshi! I brought the best ones so you could try some of them too!” You fed him each individual food and waited for his verdict with wide eyes.

“Yeah I like this one better than the last one.” He commented. He loved how easily pleased you were.

This was his favorite thing, just enjoying small special moments with you.

___________________________

Daichi: Pushes you around in the cart

-Doesn't want to break store policy

-Like as much as he loves you, getting kicked out of a grocery store is not on his to-do list

-He is just such a sucker for you when you beg

--Already head over heels for you

-Always has to bribe you in exchange for denying you grocery cart access

-He's basically a glorified babysitter let's be real

“Oh my gosh it’s perfect. It’ll look so good on the windowsill in the bedroom!” You squealed.

Daichi couldn’t believe that you were this excited over a tiny potted plant.

“I’m worried you’re starting to like that plant more than me.” Daichi scoffed.

“Well come on, it’s not like you can compete. This is the cutest thing in existence!” You raised the little plant Lion King style into the air.

“Well I mean, almost.” Daichi shrugged. “The plant is second to you.” He tapped the tip of your nose with his finger.

“Ugh you’re such a sap.” You laughed and turned to him.

“Only for you.”

“Well in that case, I am going to take this rare opportunity to ask...Can I please please please ride in the cart, Dai? You know, since you love me so much?” Daichi rolled his eyes. You asked every single time you two went to the store. He was already expecting it. And he was 1000% ready to deny your request as usual. But with the puppy eyes you were throwing at him, that stupid little plant clutched in your hands...It was too much. I mean the guy was only human. He sighed. “Okay. Fine.” He watched your eyes light up. “BUT BUT- Only this ONE time. Got it?”

You nodded fervidly and started to climb into the cart.

It must have looked ridiculous. You, sitting cross legged in a shopping cart, grasping a tiny plant in your lap, while a grown man pushed you around.

Even if you did look ridiculous, you didn’t care. You were perfectly content as long as you were in Daichi’s arms, well er- cart.

___________________________

Hinata: You two race to find items the fastest.

-People aren't really sure if you two are in an actual relationship as much as you're in an enemies with benefits situation, with how competitive you are

-It's always only in the name of fun

-He's still so sweet on you

-He is also fantastic at distracting you which is great unless you're actually trying to be productive

-Super comfortable around each other

It had been a few weeks since you had been grocery shopping and the crumpled paper list clutched in your hand was a mile long.

“I’m sorry you came with me, Shoyo. This is going to take forever!” You whined and leaned against his side.

“Hey Y/n it’s okay! I can help get stuff for you!” Typical Hinata. Internally, he was frantically trying to come up with a way to make grocery shopping more fun for you.

“Thanks Shoyo. You sure you don’t wanna go home? This is going to take a while and I’d much rather just lay in bed and binge watch a tv show with you.” You complained.

“Trust me, I would too. But I promise I’ll get as many things on that list as possible for you!” Hinata smiled brightly and you couldn’t help but think how sweet he was.

“In fact, I bet I can find the things on your list faster than you.” He knew exactly how to motivate you. Competition.

“Oh really? Are you prepared to test that theory, Sho?” You ripped the list in half and gave him the longer half.

“Hey! This is cheating.” He held up his half of the list.

“You’re the one who initiated the competition, and I figured since you were so confident…” You leered.

“Fine. I’ll still beat you.” He laughed and continued, “Meet at the checkout? Winner gets to choose the show we watch tonight.”

“Deal! You’re on.” You shook hands with him.

“Ready?”

“GO!” Both you and Hinata broke into a sprint, heading in opposite directions.

Time skip tilde~

“I still don’t understand how you won!”

“Shoyo. Maybe because you forgot to get a cart and instead haphazardly decided to carry everything.” You rolled your eyes.

“There wasn’t enough time!”

[littlejeanniebean]

Hi, could you please do “sorry, have we met?” and “you’re so clingy, i love it” together for Jily?

“Oh my god!” Lily threw her arms around him. “You had me worried sick! Don’t do that again, James! I can’t lose you to a stupid bludger of all things!”

James patted her back awkwardly and when she sat back, he got a good look at her face, watery green eyes, pouty pink lips, and deep red hair. She was beautiful. One of his hands nervously ran through his hair. “Sorry... have we met?” 

Lily’s mouth dropped open into a small ‘o.’ “Pomfrey!” she practically shrieked. “Sirius! Remus! Peter! Get in here!” 

The boys arrived first, long-haired Sirius with a little black star drawn in permanent marker on his left cheekbone, Remus with his Gryffindor sweater and scarf he looked like a red and gold mascot, and Peter with cookies. 

“Here you go, Prongs.” He put the platter on the nightstand for him. “Sorry about the game, mate. You gave ‘em a good run —”

“Wait, I thought my name was James?” He frowned deeply. “I like ‘James’ much better than — than —”

“Prongs!” Sirius beamed, seemingly unperturbed by his best friend’s complete lack of memory. “That’s not your call to make, I’m afraid. You’ll always be ‘Prongsie’ to us.”

“What’s all the ruckus?” Pomfrey pushed the curtain aside. “O’Malley needs his rest if he’s going to grow his bones back —”

“I think James has lost his memory.” Lily worried her bottom lip between her teeth, looking at him sorrowfully. He thought she looked adorable. 

“Right.” Pomfrey tapped her wand on the crown of his head three times. “Tell me, what’s the last thing you can remember?”

“Er… getting my Hogwarts letter? I think? But that can’t be right, because my hands were not this big when I was eleven… How old am I?”

“Sixteen,” said Lily. She smiled shyly at James. “Almost seventeen.” 

A scroll was unraveling across the floor with Madame Pomfrey’s readings of James’ brain. She picked it up and excused herself to examine it. 

James felt his cheeks heat up as he smiled at Lily, who was still looking at him earnestly. “So… are you… Are you my… girlfriend?” 

Sirius, for some reason, started laughing. 

Remus’ lips were pursed, which meant he was containing laughter too. Peter just looked on with wide eyes, eating one of James’ get-well-soon cookies. 

“I… I don’t know if I should tell you that.” Lily’s cheeks were tinged pink. “You might want to try to get your memories back on your own.”

James perked up. “So… like… we should kiss or something? To see if I remember anything?” 

This sent the boys into even further hysterics. 

Lily buried her face in her hands, peeking out at him between her long, narrow fingers. She was adorable. “I… I mean… if you want? I don’t want to take advantage of you in a vulnerable state —” 

“I mean, if we’re not dating and I’ve never asked you out, I’m an idiot.” James shrugged. “You clearly care about me and you’re beautiful to boot!”

Lily couldn’t meet his eyes, but she did kiss him, just a light peck on the lips. “Anything?”

“Mm…” James hummed, his eyes still closed behind his spectacles. “Not yet… Might have to do it again, just to make sure…” 

Lily kissed him again, harder. Vaguely, James heard his friends leave the room (well, he heard Sirius gagging and Peter pretending to attend to him). 

One of Lily’s hands set itself on his shoulder while the other cupped his cheek in her warm palm. Her lips moved with fervor, willing him to remember anything about her. 

James let out a little gasp when her lips left his with a soft pop. “Lily Evans, born January 30th, 1960, hates her sister, loves her friends, ambivalent about Quidditch, obsessed with hardback books if they’re Muggle, leatherbound if they’re magic — ow!”

She’d pinched his arm and tackled him into another hug. 

“What was that for?” he mumbled into her hair. 

She pinched him again, this time in his side. “I ought to set your pants on fire for this, James Fleamont Potter! Don’t you dare prank me like that ever again!” 

He sighed into her embrace and she didn’t let go for a full two minutes. Then she sat beside him on the small hospital bed and snuggled into his shoulder. 

“You’re so clingy, I love it.” James chuckled. 

She pinched his thigh this time. “I mean it,” she snapped, but there was no real bite to it. “Don’t. Do that. Again.”

“Alright, alright, but just out of curiosity, what gave me away?”

“That’s not how regaining your memory works!” Lily laughed this time and didn’t pinch him. “Pomfrey’s not going to be happy with you for making her take a brain scan.”

James winced guiltily, slipping out of bed. “I’ll come clean if you’ll come with me?” 

“Oh-ho, no, you can face the consequences of your actions on your own, Potter.” Lily collected her things (Gryffindor Quidditch banner, Gryffindor scarf, Gryffindor glowsticks — maybe his assessment of ‘ambivalent about Quidditch’ was mistaken after all). “I’ll be waiting for you in the Head’s dorms.”

800+ words for you, anon!!! hope you liked it! thank you so much for the ask! xx

[the1918]

evanstan. abo. mpreg sebby and mildly overbearing chris would be absolutely fantastic.

I know this ask is from a long time ago when I was taking prompts to pick an mpreg fic to write (which I am writing— recovering!Bucky A/B/O). But I was having some Thoughts about this and kind of ended up with an alpha!Chris x omega!Seb head canon and I’m very happy about that because there is honestly not enough Evanstan A/B/O in the world? (Preface: This head canon is completely independent of my ‘normal’ Evanstan RPF stuff)

warning: fluff and smut ahoy!

Alright so Chris Evans puts a baby in Sebastian Stan let’s do this:

It’s a huge moment when they finally get that positive pregnancy test...

They’d been trying for a worryingly long time and Seb had become convinced that they waited too long, that he was almost 40 now and he was too old to carry a baby.

I’m picturing a lot of Chris laying on the praise and comfort through the shared disappointment of all those negative tests, a lot of “no, no baby you’re perfect, I just need to do more next heat, need to knot you up even better next time, okay?”

Chris is so proud and ecstatic when it finally happens that it all kind of funnels into arousal and he goes and sweeps a crying Seb off his feet like he isn’t a fully grown man, lays him down in their bed and rips off Seb’s clothes without hardly taking his own off.

He presses Seb’s thighs into his chest and fucks his husband like that so he can rub hands all over his still-flat belly and let his mouth run away with “can’t wait to see you all big with our kid, with my kid” and “wish I could put another in you right now, just like this, just like this, just take it”.

The first trimester is kind of hell for them both, and not just because Seb’s got the absolute worst morning sickness.

To be honest I absolutely lol’d @ ‘mildly overbearing’ in the prompt because who are we kidding? Chris would be intensely overbearing until Seb finally has to tell him to tone it the fuck down.

Chris is constantly telling Seb to take it easy and swooping in literally anytime he sees Seb trying to move an object that weighs more than 10 pounds, which is all well and cute and a little charming at first... but then they end up in a massive shouting match the day that Chris implies Seb should quit weight training completely. Massive. Seb tells Chris that he “could never understand how hard it is for an omega actor to keep on muscle between jobs, to be worried you won’t ever get another alpha role or even a beta role because of how hard you have to work just to pass,” but then he keeps going and he ends up saying a lot of things that he doesn’t mean and Chris knows he doesn’t mean them but Chris cries anyways, and that makes Seb cry. The whole thing ends with them on the floor surrounded by medicine balls and holding each other, Chris apologizing over and over and over because he “wasn’t tryna control you, baby, I’m so sorry,” Seb promising to talk to his obstetrics doc how he can maybe adjust his weight routine to be safe for their growing baby.

Other times Chris definitely deserves the cold shoulder, but sometimes Seb is just feeling irritable. He takes to shutting himself away in the bedroom and blasting the song from ‘Never Ending Story’ until he calms down.

The whole first trimester Chris is practically vibrating out of his skin with the itch to tell his family but he can’t yet, Seb wants to wait, which Chris understands and respects but it is so, so hard for him. When they finally hit the 12 week mark and Chris gets to tell them, his mom just smiles and says, “Oh, sweetie, I smelled it on him weeks ago,” and she hugs them both.

Oh my goodness... when Seb starts showing in the second trimester?!?

The night that Seb first looks in the mirror and actually notices a bump, Chris is on their bed reading a script. Seb comes out of the master bathroom, one hand rucking up his over-sized sleep-shirt and resting on his tummy, grinning from ear-to-ear with his eyebrows knitted together adorably with something like awe and a sweet kind of heartache, reaching out for Chris with his other hand and softly saying, “Look, alpha...”— and Seb never calls him that, outside of the deepest throes of heat. The sound of the word and the sight of his omega with his baby growing inside makes something deeply primal surge through Chris so fast and sharp it feels like whiplash, and it comes out as a proud growl.

Seb had known for years how much Chris was dying to finally see him like this, to see him “all pretty and bred up ‘cause of what I did to you”... but oh, god, it’s so much more than he could have ever expected.

The thing is that it’s not just the baby bump Chris is obsessed with. He tries to hide it from Seb but Seb sees it, the way that Chris’s gaze gets all heavy and dark when he starts to notice Seb’s thighs and ass thickening up with fat instead of just muscle. He starts getting handsier every time Seb is around, finding excuses to grab and cup and feel every curve on Seb’s pregnant body.

When they have sex Chris is nothing short of worshipful (if not more than a little possessive). He will lick and kiss every square inch of Seb’s skin before telling Seb to lay back with his ass on the edge of the mattress, and then he’ll hold Seb’s legs up while Chris stands and fucks down into him, practically begging when he tells Seb to put his hands on either side of his own swollen belly, to touch, to stroke around all that struggling skin, to “show me where you keep her safe, show me-- yeah, that’s right, am I the one that put that little girl inside you? Yeah, that was me? Tell me sugar, say it, say ‘Daddy, you--’” 

Sometime in the middle of the second trimester Seb’s hormones make him go from ‘miserable and bitchy’ to something more like ‘fat and happy’ and that mood magically sticks around for the third trimester, even when his ankles start to swell up.

The baby is due in March so that means that Chris gets to spend the entire last trimester taking pictures of Seb bundled up in chunky maternity sweaters and scarves while he looks out over the snowy Massachusetts hills, nose a little pink, cheeks flushed, smiling wide and looking happy and perfectly adorable.

Speaking of pictures-- Chris takes so many of them that Seb almost starts to get annoyed, but then Chris tells him how he just wants to “make sure our little girl knows how gorgeous her mama was when she was growin’ in his belly, she’s never gonna get to see it like I did,” and Seb can’t help but smile. Chris captures that one on film, and he loves it so much he gets it framed.

Seb. Nests. He goes crazy with nesting. Their home was definitely decorated by professionals when they moved in but over the course of his pregnancy Seb slowly starts to make it more personal, starts to buy things from antique shops that catch his eye, purchase art and photography and really soft blankets that strike him as something their home just... needs. There are no professionals present when he and Chris paint the nursery themselves and get paint all over the hardwood floors.

Baby Girl Evans comes into the world very, very early on a Wednesday morning, just after midnight.

Sebastian labors for 18 hours, the first half of which are spent at home while they wait for Seb’s contractions to speed up. Chris knows better than to start freaking out and try to drive Seb to the hospital too early, but it’s a close thing; he wants to freak out. Seb passes the time watching the Food Network on the couch and trying to keep his mind off the pain. He stops trying to time the contractions himself after the first two hours, when he notices Chris press a button on his watch every time Seb starts wincing and breathing extra deep.

The hours fly by and before they know it Seb’s body is saying it’s go-time. Chris stays by Seb’s head the whole time, at Seb’s insistence. He covers Seb’s sweaty forehead and hair in kisses and he murmurs praise and encouragement and tells Seb he’s “so good, so perfect, making our little girl and bringing her into the world so we can love on ‘er forever, so perfect, thank you,” and the majority of the time Seb doesn’t even try and swat him away.

Her first little cry is angry and piercing. It’s the most beautiful thing either of them have ever heard. 

Seb’s mom says she looks like the spitting image of Sebastian. Chris’s mom says she looks just like Chris. Neither Chris nor Sebastian really care who she looks like, so long as they can keep kissing her dimpled chin and staring into her blue eyes.

...

lmao wut gross

masterlist [x]

[ibijau]

Daemon AU? Daemon AU /o/ thanks to the xisang discord for helping me with a number of details like jgy’s daemon 

This is not intended to be a plot filled story but I have thoughts and opinions on cultivators and their daemons oops

Nie Huaisang chose a book he knew well, so he could talk about it if anyone asked questions, and went to sit on a bench well in view of the training disciples, so they could testify he was there the entire time. Just as expected, actually reading his book quickly proved impossible with his attention divided this way. He made no particular effort either, so that Chiwen would have an easier time with her own task. Still, he remembered here and there turn a page, and to slip a hand inside his robes, to make it look like she was with her. Nie Huaisang didn’t expect anyone to actually pay attention to him, and he expected even less for Chiwen to be caught, but precautions never hurt.

It was lonely on that bench, and a little boring as well, but Nie Huaisang kept up appearances until he noticed a sparrow hopping not too far from him.

As nonchalantly as he could manage, Nie Huaisang closed his book and rose from the bench. He hesitated for a moment on where to go, before deciding that he’d had enough fresh air for the day and heading for his room. Spooked by him, the sparrow promptly flew away. Nie Huaisang did not even spare it a glance.

When Nie Huaisang reached his room, Chiwen was waiting for him on a low table, a dormouse once more. Nie Huaisang hurried to join her, carelessly dropping his book to the floor and opening his hands so she could sit there. He nearly sobbed at feeling her close against, and brought her against his chest.

“You’re ridiculous,” Chiwen scolded him, as if she weren’t nuzzling against his hands as well. “This is why nobody takes us seriously, you know.”

“I know, I know… did you get it though?”

Chiwen scoffed at the question. Rather than to answer, she turned into a pretty little canary and started singing. Nie Huaisang laughed in delight, and brought her to his shoulder so he could get something to write down the melody. After multiple tries, Chiwen swore that they had the correct thing, though Nie Huaisang continued checking his paper without conviction.

“Are you really sure?” he insisted, before humming the notes to himself. “It didn’t sound like that when Er-ge played it.”

“Well, that’s how San-ge played it,” Chiwen grumbled, ruffling her feathers. “Maybe he has to use a different version because he’s less good.”

Nie Huaisang pouted, dissatisfied with that explanation.

“Er-ge said that San-ge worked hard on this song and can play him just as well as he does. Isn’t it odd? Maybe San-ge is tired from everything he has to do in Lanling and he got confused… do you think we should tell him? But he might feel embarrassed…”

“He’ll also want to know how we know,” Chiwen pointed out, pecking at his earlobe. “And then he’ll start asking questions. A dormouse couldn’t have gotten there without being noticed!”

Nie Huaisang sighed, and scratched her belly. She was right, of course. She usually was.

“Maybe we could…”

A knock on the door startled both of them. Chiwen hurriedly returned to her habitual form, while Nie Huaisang shoved the scribbled melody inside his robes before allowing the person to enter. He breathed a little easier when it was only a servant, telling him that his brother was requesting his presence. Nie Huaisang thanked him for the message, and hurried out of his room to go meet Nie Mingjue. With his bad temper these days, it was better not to make him wait.

As soon as he came inside the room, Nie Huaisang spotted Baxia laying down next to the throne were his brother sat. She had her eyes closed, her front paws tucked in under her, and he knew that Jin Guangyao’s music had worked in helping his brother relax. He relaxed a little as well, especially once he came to Nie Mingjue’s side while Chiwen ran to Baxia and made herself comfortable against her chest. Baxia scoffed at the intrusion, and untucked one large paw to pin down Chiwen and start grooming her.

Nie Huaisang chuckled at the sight, knowing his daemon would complain against it later. Mostly though, he was happy to see them getting along again. The last few days had been a little tense for everyone.

“San-ge, I’m glad you’re visiting,” Nie Huaisang said, bowing to Jin Guangyao and Piaohua.

Jin Guangyao, sitting further down the room as if he were a supplicant rather than a guest, bowed back with a warm smile. The little orchid mantis on his hand moved as well, probably making a similar gesture. It was always hard to say with him, since he was so small, but in Nie Huaisang's experience Piaohua was always just as polite as his human.

“I am always happy to be here,” Jin Guangyao replied. “And since I am here… Huaisang, I hope you will not mind, I took the liberty of buying something for you.”

Nie Huaisang couldn't help clapping his hands. Jin Guangyao always brought him the best gifts. Before he could take a step to claim his present, Nie Huaisang felt his eyes drawn to Chiwen. She was still under Baxia's big paw, now struggling to get free from the snow leopard's hold so they could go see the gift. For a moment Nie Huaisang worried that his brother's mood was already turning sour, but Baxia's eyes were half closed and she was lazily swinging her tail. She was just playing, at least for now, but Chiwen wasn't. She was really trying to get back to Nie Huaisang, putting as much effort into escaping as she could without shifting. Nie Huaisang could feel her distress, and it worried him. It was really not the right moment to accidentally reveal they'd been lying for years. 

"Huaisang owns enough crap already," Nie Mingjue grumbled, ignoring what their daemons were doing. "You need to stop spoiling him."

"It's not crap!" Nie Huaisang gasped in horror, still glancing again and again toward Chiwen and Baxia. "Da-ge, don't be rude like that! And let Chiwen go, please." 

"She's right there, what more do you need?" Nie Mingjue scoffed, a frown forming on his face. "You can at least be this far from your daemon, can't you?" 

Nie Huaisang tensed. Baxia's eyes were fully open now, staring right through him. She wouldn't hurt Chiwen, she never could, but the challenge was unmistakable, directed at either of them. If Nie Huaisang wanted his trinket, either Chiwen had to prove her strength by escaping, or he had to prove his by stepping away. And it wasn't that Nie Huaisang couldn't, of course, but they'd already been apart so long that day, and… 

And he really didn't like how obsessed Nie Mingjue was with increasing their capacity for distance lately. Between that, his new insistence on more sabre lessons, and his unpredictable temper, Nie Huaisang's nerves were badly mistreated. 

It took effort to cross the distance to join Jin Guangyao. Nie Huaisang tried to pretend it was nothing to him, but feeling Chiwen trapped like that always sent his heart racing with anxiety. It reminded him too much of the indoctrination camp.

He still smiled brightly as he knelt next to Jin Guangyao. They shared a look, both of them silently agreeing that Nie Mingjue was unreasonable with his expectations. Jin Guangyao then took a little wooden box from his sleeve, and gave it to Nie Huaisang. 

"San-ge, it's gorgeous !" Nie Huaisang exclaimed when he saw the fan inside. "It's so beautifully painted! Da-ge, please let Chiwen go, she needs to see this!" 

Nie Mingjue huffed and leaned on one elbow to exchange a look with Baxia. She looked more restless now, as if the effect of the music had already disappeared, but she slowly lifted her paw so Chiwen could run back to her human. 

Nie Huaisang couldn't resist the need to open his hand so she could climb on it. He also failed to refrain the deep exhale at being reunited, even knowing both Chiwen and Nie Mingjue would scold him later. 

"It really is so pretty!" he said with all the cheerfulness he could manage as he showed Chiwen their new fan. "As expected, San-ge has perfect taste. I will have to find a good place to display it. It is far too beautiful to be used! Or maybe it can be, but only for very exceptional circumstances. Maybe if Da-ge gets married!" 

Nie Huaisang laughed at the idea, while Chiwen jumped down to go greet Piaohua who had flown down to the ground. 

"Stop saying nonsense," Nie Mingjue scoffed. "Go put that crap away and come back here so we can try to have a serious talk. Hurry!" 

Startled to hear him so upset, so soon after having music played to him, Nie Huaisang glanced at Baxia's restless tail before exchanging a look with Jin Guangyao. He too looked concerned. If the song was losing its potency, it did not bode well for the future. 

Truly worried once more about upsetting his brother, Nie Huaisang hurried to his room with Chiwen on his shoulder so he could put the new fan where it belonged. 

As soon as the door closed behind them, Chiwen changed forms and turned into her own snow leopard shape. She was a lot smaller than Baxia, her fur a little less dense. Nie Huaisang did not hesitate and sank to his knees to bury his face against her neck. 

"It's not the same," Chiwen reminded him, before licking his cheek to comfort him. "They're just trying to make us stronger. Baxia says she doesn't get why we always need to be together like this and it worries them." 

"It feels the same. And he knows I can walk away from you, he's seen me do it plenty of times, why does he need me to prove it again all the time?" 

"Because it's not the same," Chiwen sighed, nuzzling closer. "They don't struggle like we do. No cultivators do. Of course they worry."

Nie Huaisang sighed, and pulled her closer. 

"Do you think we're broken?" he whispered, that old worry of his resurfacing. "We really should be able to be separated without it been so hard, and you… you should have settled already." 

"It just doesn't feel right," Chiwen retorted, the same non-answer she always gave. "And we'd never been apart before the Wens made us, it's not supposed to happen like that…" 

Nie Huaisang nodded, trying to find comfort in that, even when they both knew it wasn't that easy. He wished he could have explained to Nie Mingjue how awful it had been to have Chiwen forced away from him before he was ready for it, but his brother never seemed to understand. Every cultivator went through separation to finish forming their golden core, and it was hard on everyone, but… but Nie Huaisang still felt what had happened to him was different. 

"We should go back," Chiwen said after a while. "He'll be upset if we're too long."

Nie Huaisang nodded. He wiped his eyes quickly, then went to drop the fan on his bed, Chiwen following him as a small dog. She only turned back to a dormouse when he had his hand on the door, and climbed all the way to his shoulder, making herself comfortable there. 

"Don't go back near Baxia," Nie Huaisang ordered as they headed back to the throne room. "That was really too scary."

"I won't," Chiwen promised, trying to hide inside his collar. "But don't annoy Da-ge too much either. You know how he is when San-ge is here." 

Nie Huaisang grimaced and nodded. It had gotten better for a time, but if the song was no longer working… Perhaps there really was a mistake in the way Jin Guangyao was playing it. Nie Huaisang would have to let him know, next time he could catch him alone. 

[nazghoulz]

The Definitive Ranking of Richard Armitage’s Acting Roles, Rated Exclusively by How Hot I Find Him In Screengrabs

Richard Armitage. As a diehard Thorin Oakenshield fan I certainly have a complicated relationship with him, mainly because I can never decide if I find him inherently hot or not. On the one hand, I’m a hardcore Thorinfucker. On the other hand my gay ass sees a headshot of Mr. Armitage and I’m just like, “Oh, no thank you.” So in order to set myself to rights, I have gone through Mr. Armitage’s IMDB and done a definitive ranking of all his 44 screen roles on there, based completely and arbitrarily on how hot I find him in screenshots. (Thank you to all the hardcore Armitage Fuckers who keep wordpress blogs with screengrabs of his various cameos and bit parts; my respect for you cannot be put into words.) I haven’t seen like 90% of these properties, and I didn’t bother to research them, so these are mainly just gut first impressions. I hope this helps anyone else out there who as confused by him as I am. Enjoy ?

44. Father Quart in The Seville Communion/The Man From Rome (2020)   — ??/10

I don’t think this movie is out yet? Idk I haven’t been able to find any stills of him, let alone much information about the movie itself. It’s listed on his IMDB though! And apparently he’s playing a priest...which could be extremely  👁️👁️ if done correctly.

43. Unnamed Naboo Fighter Pilot in Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace (1999) — 1/10

OH SWEETIE NO!!!!! This physically pains me to say this, because I unironically love this terrible movie with my whole heart, but unlike a yung Kiera Knightley’s role (pictured front and center) as Padmé’s loyal body double Sabé, this is probably a cameo that we would all like to forget about. The only thing Richard has to offer is this unfortunate turtle-faced realness. This helmet does him no favors.

42. Man in Pub in Boon (1992) — 2/10

As far as I know this is Richard’s first acting credit on IMDB, and he for sure is working the background extra energy. Go on girl give us nothing! He does have a decent backside though, and it’s better than looking at unfortunate turtle face, so I give this one a 2.

41. Paul Andrews in Between the Sheets (2003)  — 2/10

I can’t really articulate why, but I absolutely despise every screenshot I see of Richard Armitage in this role. He is completely unhot, and not even in a way I can laugh at. He takes no advantage of his assets, he has no charisma, no magnetism, no nothing. This is Richard Armitage at his most white bread rando, in a way that makes me actively dislike him. Pbbbbttth. Bad. Throw this whole thing away.

40. Craig Parker in Casualty (2001)  — 2/10

I don’t know, it’s like the perfect storm of the gelled 2001 hair, the terrible quarter? eighth? zip sweater, and overall, er, skeezy vibes that he gives off that makes him particularly unhot in this role. Perhaps not as reprehensible as Unhot Paul, but still. I think the sheer boringness of this has to count for something. Blech.

39. Dr. Tom Steele in Doctors (2001) — 2.5/10

He honestly looks like a villain in an early season of Alias, which... well. Quentin Tarantino was cast as a bit-part villain in Alias season one, so take that as you will. But at least he’s compelling here, which is why he gets half a point over Unhot Paul.

38. Steven in Frozen (2005) — 3/10

Get some rest, tall child! You can’t keep burning the candle at both ends! Also short haircuts do nothing for you, Richard. Styled like this, they just serve to make you look sort of like a sleaze.

37. Peter Macduff in ShakespeaRe-Told (2005) — 3/10

He honestly looks like he could be a guest star in Friends in this one, where he’s a guy named Jason who Ross meets in Central Perk where they find they have a lot in common. Ross introduces Jason to Monica and they really hit it off, but it all comes crashing down because while Jason is sensitive and writes poetry, he also thinks that the Earth is flat. The rest of the episode is trying to get rid of Jason while he becomes increasingly obsessed with Monica, and Ross cannot quite let go trying to prove to Jason that the world is round. Anyway. Macduff Flat Earth Jason isn’t quite as unhot as Unhot Paul, but he’s pretty much on the same level as Tired Steven.

36. Phillip Durrant in Marple (2007) — 3/10

Something about him in this image really makes me want to punch him in the face. It’s huge Peter Parker in Spider-Man 3 energy.

35. Young Claude Monet in The Impressionists (2006) — 3.5/10

I’M LOSING MY FUCKING MIND THE FIRST THING THAT COMES TO MIND IS !!! CARNIVAL BARKER !!!!! STEP RIGHT UP TO SEE THE WORST GOATEE IN HISTORY !!! I was actually going to give Yung Claude a 2 but the more I look at this terrible beard the more impressed I am with the boldness of this look, so I had to bump it up to 3.5. Idk. Just look at this. It’s incredible, especially knowing what kind of beard Armitage can grow himself !!!!!!!!

34. Heinz Kruger in Captain America: The First Avenger (2011) — 3.5/10

This is definitely the best looking he’s been so far in this list, but he’s a Nazi in this one, which makes him unsexy on principle. But do I feel a little something when he gets pinned to the ground by jacked Chris Evans with the above look on his face right before he swallows his cyanide pill? Can neither confirm nor deny. They are also truly playing into his inherently sinister bone structure, so I can respect that.

33. Percy Courtney in Miss Marie Lloyd (2007) — 4/10

Even including Yung Claude and Nazi Heinz, I think Nothing Percy is probably the weakest of Richard’s period looks, mostly because he looks like, well, nothing. He certainly doesn’t pull off that top hat like he does in North and South, and the secret to that might be the lack of sideburns. In this one he just sort of reminds me of the asshole fiance in Titanic.

32. Philip Turner in The Inspector Lynley Mysteries (2005) — 4/10

He’s really giving off bargain bin Hugh Jackman as Wolverine vibes here, if Logan’s energy was more “murderer in a Hallmark channel mystery” than “superhero.” Though, given what sort of show this is, that may be the point! Idk, this isn’t the worst. At least he has a decent haircut in this one. Still, I feel absolutely nothing when I look at him. He’s simply royalty-free stock music given human form.

31. Dr. Alec Track in The Golden Hour (2005) — 4.5/10

I could see how this conceivably be sexy in this role, but to be honest, he’s still nothing to me, sorry. He gets some extra points because he obviously worked out for this role and the hard nips through a white undershirt is a commendable look. I whole-heartedly respect Doctor Alec’s thottitude.

30. Daryl in Staged (1999) — 4.5/10

Speaking of thottitude!!!!! This is one cream-faced business boy that I can certainly get into! He looks like the love interest in a pre-Hayes code homoerotic thriller from the early 1930s. I’m sure that’s just because of the lighting and general staging of this production, but hm... demure. Love it.

29. Capt. Ian Macalwain in Ultimate Force (2003) — 4.5/10

Well, he looks like a character from M*A*S*H but with no charisma, or like an extra in The Great Escape who snitches on Steve McQueen to the Nazis. Also in half the pictures I find of him from this he’s wearing this terrible beret, which I know he can pull off because of a role that ranks much higher on this list. Whoever styles this man really needs to pay attention to what sort of headgear they put on him.  

28. Epiphanes in Cleopatra (1999) — 5/10

Speaking of headgear, you know what?? He doesn’t look awful here. A solid 5, perfectly acceptable. I think the helmet does a lot to accentuate the sharpness of his face in this extremely bit part, though the eyeliner definitely also helps as well.

27. John Mulligan in Moving On (2009) — 5/10

Mr. Armitage’s characters can really have potential when a production’s stylist allows him to wear scruff (IN A WAY THAT LOOKS NATURAL, LOOKING AT YOU YUNG CLAUDE). However, as it is with John Mulligan in Moving On here, he just sort of looks like a rando? They’re not playing into the inherent angularity of his face, which for me makes it sort of confusing regarding what sort of emotion I’m supposed to feel while looking at him. As it is, I’m just like, “Yup, that sure is a regular human man, right there.”

26. Smug Man at Party in This Year’s Love (1999) — 5/10

This is the face of a man who less smug and is more DRUNK OUT OF HIS MIND !!!! Idk. He’s cute here, I’ll admit. That’s all I have to say about it.

25. John Standring in Sparkhouse (2002) — 5.5/10

I enjoy the bold choice of giving him wavy hair in this one, but I’m not sure he quite pulls it off. It doesn’t look bad, per se, just... he looks completely nonthreatening. Which I guess could be someone’s thing, but not mine. He honestly looks like a knock-off Will Graham, sans dogs and trauma.

24. Gary in Into the Storm (2014) — 5.5/10

I think the thing that really gets me is that this character’s name is Gary. Who on God’s green Earth looks at Richard Armitage and goes, “Ah yes, you do look like a Gary” ??? I don’t think I know of a single non-American Gary, especially since the name Gary only got popularized after Gary Cooper renamed himself after his hometown of Gary, Indiana!!!! It wasn’t really a name for human men before that!!!! I want to live in the alternate universe where Frank Cooper was originally from Albuquerque and named himself Albuquerque Cooper and this character is named as such. Gary. Really.

23. King Oleron in Alice Through the Looking Glass (2016) — 5.5/10

I truly hate how much his facial expressions in these stills remind me of Thorin, considering how bad he looks otherwise. Like his face his fine, I guess, especially since this is the first instance of his full beard. I’m charmed despite myself! Take me to wonderland, O King.

22. Adam Price in The Stranger (2020) — 5.5/10

For as compelling as people call this series, Richard here isn’t very much so imo. But despite my utter lack of interest, he doesn’t look bad per se. He just sort of has that stubbly white man blandness that colors a lot of his more recent roles. Like, at least his bad mid-2000′s styling had character. This is just the visual representation of a vague handwave.

21. Harry Kennedy in The Vicar of Dibley (2006)  — 6/10

Gosh... floppy hair, cute sweaters... he also seems to be smiling a lot in this one, which is nice! The only thing I have to complain about is that he looks very much like if Bradley Cooper and Hugh Jackman circa Kate and Leopold had a baby, which may not necessarily be too much of a bad thing, but I can’t unsee it.

20. Sgt. John Porter in Strike Back (2010)  — 6/10

Ah, back to poorly suited haircuts. At least he’s a little bit gritter and grimier than we’ve seen so far, and I will say Richard Armitage does look good covered in dirt, as we will see later on. Also he’s got biceps in this one, which, hell yeah.

19.  Ricky Deeming in Inspector George Gently (2007)  — 6/10

I’M HAVING THE HARDEST TIME RIGHT NOW RANKING THIS ONE BC OF THIS INCREDIBLE LITTLE WHITE SCARF-RIDING LEATHERS COMBO!!! WHICH ABSOLUTE GENIUS DECIDED THIS!!!! EVERY SCREENSHOT OF HIM IN HIS EPISODE HAS THIS!!! Part of me just wants to give Stylish Ricky a big fat 10 because I’m gay and adore the sheer audacity of this look, but I still have to be fair and rank his overall aura accordingly. I think he’s a handsome extremely gay-coded motorcycle lad in this one, but he doesn’t exactly rev my engine, so to speak.

18. Lucas North in Spooks (2008) — 6/10

The tattoos really spice this one up. Luke could have been plagued by the problems inherent in Regular Mulligan’s Moving On styling, but this guy has an edge to him. He has a good haircut and 5′ o’clock shadow, which is something I’ve figured out is integral to Armitage Hotness. I feel like if I got to know this character I could possibly find him sexy.

17. Raymond de Merville in Pilgrimage (2017) — 6.5/10

Speaking of bad haircuts, this one is his undoing. This is almost the perfect balance between full beard and short haircut, which is the only way a short haircut works on this man, but they ruined it with this one! They gave him a bad bowl fade, which completely undoes any inherent sexiness that comes with being a knight. Not even the fact that he’s covered in dirt can turn me on at this point, ugh. Guy of Gisbourne he is not!!!

16. Tom Calahan in Brain on Fire (2016) — 6.5/10

Oh hell yes, WELCUM 2 DA DILF ZONE!!! I’m not super duper thrilled with the looks I’ve seen from this movie, but he seems scruffy and comfy in a way that is slightly refreshing for ol’ Richard. This is certainly the best of his normie looks so far. I’m just sad it took them 24 years to figure out how to style him properly for sympathetic roles in a contemporary setting.

15. James in My Zoe (2019) — 6.5/10

It’s another DILF look, slightly edgier than Comfy Tom but none of that sexy tired energy that we’ll see from Ocean’s 8. I don’t know !! Jimmy here doesn’t exactly thrill me, I think I prefer Tom’s flannels to this sharp bomber jacket/white t shirt combo seen here. Oh well! I am extremely  👀 👀 👀 👀 👀 that he can just casually palm that soccer ball like that.

14. John Thornton in North & South (2004)  — 7/10

Alright. I’m sorry. I just don’t find him that hot in this role. Like yeah, he’s got the scruff and the sideburns that work to his advantage, and the setting does make this character inherently sexy, but in some screenshots he screams too much of an aforementioned Kate and Leopold (the best Meg Ryan movie, imo) era Hugh Jackman to me. And if I was particularly into that, I would just watch Kate and Leopold again. I will admit, however, that this rating could be subject to change if I actually took the time to watch this show.

13. Chop in Urban and the Shed Crew (2015) — 7/10

...I’M??? INTO IT??? He’s dirty and scruffy but also has kind eyes.... I feel like this is knock off Will Graham who has blossomed into his own. His run down, grime-covered own. He’s back edging into Bradley Cooper territory, but somehow it works for him in this one. Like, I’m 89% sure it’s the DILF vibes I’ve been getting from the other screengrabs I’ve seen of this role, and this particular flavor of DILF is way sexier than Jimmy or Comfy Tom.

12. Francis Dolarhyde in Hannibal (2015) — 7/10

His Caesar cut doesn’t bother me quite so much in this, probably because he is pretty explicitly playing a villain in a series that doesn’t have any basis in reality. A villain who is ripped, and who can effortlessly throw real Will Graham around. Armitage uses his inherent sinisterness to great effect as the Red Dragon, which is good actually! I think a lot of how hot he is in any particular role really depends on whether the styling allows him to play to his strengths...idk! I’m not usually a huge fan of clean shaven Armitage, but it works for Frank here.

11. Daniel Miller in Berlin Station (2016) — 7/10

As much as I adore this particular look (beard + fade + green army jacket), I have to compromise and give Danny a 7/10 because it seems like the first season they styled him in usual stubbly white man blandness. I’d say screengrabs from s1 are a solid 6, while this might be an 8, so the average is a 7. That’s all I have to say about this!

10. Claude Becker in Ocean’s 8 (2018) — 7.5/10

!!!!! I love him in this role, I about had a conniption in the theater because I absolutely was not expecting him!! He looks perfectly ruffled and scruffy, edgier than either Comfy Tom or Jimmy, which I’m very into. That plus his two borzois (objectively the best looking dogs on the planet) really put Old Claude over the top for me. Thank you, thank you Hollywood stylists for finally figuring out what to do with him for roles as a Normal Man.

9. Richard Hall in The Lodge (2019) — 7.5/10

I don’t know anything about this movie, but it seems pretty spooky, which I’m into. I think Richard is well suited for this sort of horror/thriller role, where his angular features can play into the overall vibe rather than some hapless stylist trying to work around them. He looks like another cozy DILF here but with a bite to him, like someone who would do anything to protect his brood. I mean, he’s teaching this child to shoot! But idk, he also has the potential for Jack Nicholson in The Shining energy, which I also could be....hm... into. Idk. Is this on Netflix??

8. Lee in Cold Feet (2003) — 7.5/10

FUN!!! FLIRTY!!!! OTTER VIBES!!!!! I LOVE THIS, he seems so goofy here, and Armitage doesn’t usually pull off goofy that well! I’ve giggled at literally every screenshot I could find from the four episodes he was in this show, he seems like a real himbo. I’m a huge fan, even if it comes at the cost of dehydration abs.

7. William Chatford in Malice Aforethought (2005) — 7.5/10

Hoo hoo HOO DO NOT JUDGE ME!!!!!!! Maybe it’s just because I’ve been watching the new season of The Alienist and the new dark and gritty HBO reboot of Perry Mason back to back, but sue me, I love the bold choice they made with giving him a pencil moustache here. He looks like a hot Howard Hughes; if cream-faced business boy Daryl from Staged is the young ingenue in the pre-Hayes Code thriller I cast him in, Bill here is the sexy antagonist. I desperately want to hear a perfect Transatlantic accent coming out out of that  mouth. This look fucks and I’m sticking to that no matter what.

6. Trevor Belmont in Castlevania (2017) — 8/10

Ah, yes, speaking of king himbos... do me a favor and look me right in the eye and tell me that you wouldn’t fuck Trevor Belmont. You can’t, can you?????? At least 80% of Richard Armitage’s inherent hotness stems from his voice, and you can’t tell me there isn’t anything sexier than thinking about letting that guy loose in a recording studio and letting him say fuck. Look, Trevor may be drawn that way, but it’s the absolute stupidity coming out of his mouth in that sweet baritone that makes me want to be raw-dogged by 100% pure Romanian beef.

5. Dr. Scott White in Sleepwalker (2017) — 8/10 

Much like I had intimated when talking about Hot Danny in Berlin Station, this is Peak contemporary normie Richard Armitage styling. I honestly think The Hobbit either awakened something in him, or casting directors finally figured out he looks way good with a full beard. His crew cut even works with his whole look, which is a miracle!!!! I think he should be contractually obligated to have a full beard in all of his future roles, but that’s just me.

4. Guy of Gisbourne in Robin Hood (2006) — 8.5/10

I honestly can’t believe I’m ranking Guy so far up here, but honestly, THIS RULES!!!!!! THIS FUCKS!!!!!!!!! Which is incredible due to Guy’s lack of beard, but I’m weirdly okay with it? Like sure, he looks like he’d probably call me a slur in front of his shitty friends, but he also looks like he could tenderly pound me into the mattress in a way that would have me questioning my commitment to the “no emotions” clause of our clandestine no-strings-attached sex agreement. Anyway. Guy of Gisbourne if you see this im free thursday night. please message me back if you’re free thursday night when i am fr

3. Angus in Macbeth (1999) — 8.5/10

HHHNGHGNHNGHGN HE’S SO HOT.....!!! HE’S SO HOT!!!!! Leather jacket!!! Scruff!! Dirt!!!! Flattering beret!!!!! He’s so hot, and the worst part about this is that this was filmed in NINETEEN NINETY NINE!!!!!!!!!!!! Which means we could have always had this, had stylists and makeup artists PLAYED TO HIS STRENGTHS!!!!! He’s so hot I’m getting legitimately angry. Without scruff and dirt this man is nothing. N o t h i n g.

2. John Proctor in The Crucible (2014) — 9/10

Look, I know I have a type. But... this guy is just so hot, Daniel Day Lewis please step aside!!!! Contemporary theater historians describe John Proctor as a “strong beast of a man,” and... hhhHHOOOGH HELL YEAH!!! HELL !!!! YEAH !!!!! Like, his dick got almost his entire Puritan village, including himself, accused of witchcraft and like, looking at this guy, I kind of get it. I would probably go to war over the raw animal beauty of this horrible dirty, greasy man. Sue me, I confess. I saw Goody Osburn with the devil.

1. Thorin II Oakenshield in The Hobbit Trilogy  — 9.5/10

Come on. You knew it was going to be this guy. Look at my icon for christ’s sake. I am completely biased, I cannot look at his pictures objectively. Anyway. Thank you so much for reading, this was a very stupid list.

[al-in-the-air]

Drip

HBP missing moment - Hermione has imposter syndrome and Ron tries to ---comfort her. Day something of the challenge im failing to :) As always on AO3

-----------

“Oh Ron!”

It has been happening all morning. His mother was getting far too over excited about the OWL results, more excited than even he had been! It was a nice surprise, sure, for him to have only failed 2 of the nine exams, but he really didn’t think it warranted his mother squeezing him to within an inch of his life.

“Mum, stop.” Ron whined, for the fifth time.

“I can’t help it Ron! 7 OWLs! I’m so proud of you!” His mother gushed, wrapping her arms around Ron’s shoulder as he sat at the kitchen table.

It was a nice feeling, being praised by his mother and the first time he had even welcomed it,  he had leaned into her embrace feeling happy and grateful but now it was just getting ridiculous. He could feel his cheeks flushing and his ears reddening in embarrassment as she refused to release him from her grasp. “Thanks mum, you can let go now.”

She did as she was asked, reluctantly, but quickly set her sights on another target. Instead of fully moving away, she stepped just inches to her left and threw her arms around his black haired best friend. 

“And you!” she proclaimed, “Well done Harry.”

His face was priceless, shocked and confused and almost frightened at the sudden force in which the woman had thrown himself at him.

“Er, thanks Mrs Weasley.” said Harry with trepidation. Ron sniggered to himself at the tone of his voice.

“I still can’t believe you got seven OWLs.” Ginny said then, “I genuinely didn’t even think you had a brain.”

Now it was Harry’s turn to laugh as Molly scolded her daughter.

“I’m not taking it back, it's true!”

Ron kicked his sister under the table and smirked as she swore at his foot colliding with her shin. She deserved it, even though she knew she was - mostly - joking, it was still mean.  

They both opened their mouths to retort at the same time, but sensing trouble Harry managed jump in first. “Wanna play a few rounds of 2 on 2 then?”

“Yeah!” Ginny replied quickly, though she was still scowling dangerously. “I’m not going on his team though.”

“I don't want to be on yours either!"

Harry laughed, rolling his eyes exasperatedly, “Okay fine, Ginny, you can be on my team and Ron, you can go with Hermione. Sound good?”

Ron thought about it for a second and knew instantly he was about to lose spectacularly, though that tended to be the case with Hermione was paired up with anybody.

“Yeah cool. Where’s Hermione?” He hadn’t noticed Hermione leave the room, though now that thought about it, she hadn’t been at the table for a while.

“Writing to her parents.” Harry and Ginny said in unison, they both laughed as they caught each others eyes.

Ron scowled. Since when had those two gotten on so well anyway?

“I’ll go get her. You two go get the brooms.” Ron said, secretly a tiny bit excited at getting a few moments alone with Hermione. They’d had a great two days before Harry had arrived. Not that he didn’t love it when Harry was there too. It was just nice sometimes, to have some one on one time with her, after all, she was his best friend too.

It actually took quite a while to find Hermione, she wasn’t at the writing desk in the living room where Ron had assumed she’d be, nor was she holed up in Ginny’s tiny bedroom. He had all but given up and assumed she’d made her way downstairs already when he passed the middle floor bathroom.

The door was ajar, opposing, normal, but as he passed he heard the faint dripping of recently turned off taps that told him someone was in there.

“Er, Hermione, you in here?” he asked, rapping his knuckles on the wood. The door creaked open at the knock. “Oh, er, sorry.”

“No, it's fine.” Hermione said, though it was clear in everything about her that it wasn’t. She was on the edge of the bath, head ducked low and shoulders hunched together. She sniffed as she spoke, and rubbed quickly at her eyes, flinching as she hit the tender skin on her left eye. She looked annoyed at herself as tears started filling up in her eyes again.

“Er, what’s up?” Ron asked tentatively. He couldn’t cope with crying girls. “Do you want me to get mum?”

“No, no! I’m fine!” Hermione replied hastily, rubbing at her eyes more gently this time and raising from the porcelain edge.

“What about Ginny?”

“No honestly, I’m okay.”

She clearly wasn’t though. Ron knew this girl well enough to know when she was about to burst into tears.

“Look, if this is about the black eye, I’m sure Fred and George will have something for it.”

Hermione nodded for a second, turning her head to sniff loudly. So it wasn’t the black eye she was upset about.

What was it then, because it wasn’t like Hermione to just randomly get weepy in the middle of the afternoon? Ron wracked his brain for a second, still standing dumbly in the bathroom doorway. Oh! Bloody hell.

“It’s not a girl problem is it?!” He said hurriedly, hoping against hope he’d manage to keep his sheer horror out of his voice and that she knew what he meant.

“Really Ron? Straight to blaming my period?”

His face and ears flushed again. He could feel his pulse beating in his cheeks. Yep, cool he was wrong. Cool, cool, cool. He wished the floor would swallow him up, or at the very least someone would just avada him. He’d lived a good life, this seemed a reasonable place to end.

“Sorry,” he mumbled. “What are you upset about then? You can tell me.”

“You’ll laugh at me.” Hermione whispered to the floor. After what he just said, she was worried he’d laugh at her ?

“I won’t,” he said, and he meant it.

“I’m disappointed in myself for not getting better OWLs.”

“Are you mental?”

The words were out before he even really had a moment to process them and he kicked himself at his insensitivity.

“See!” Hermione shrieked, “I told you you’d laugh at me.” She made to push past him but he was quicker than her, not to mention taller and stronger now.

“No, Hermione I’m sorry. I just don’t understand how you can be disappointed. You got more Outstandings today than me Fred, George, Charlie and Bill combined!”

Tears welled in Hermione’s eyes again, “I just should’ve done better. I have to be good at everything.”

“You are good at everything?” He was being sincere, perhaps more sincere than he had ever been in his life. He wasn’t confident he knew a lot of things, but he was confident he knew that.

“No, you-you don’t understand Ron. I have to be better. I have to do better. I can’t fall behind. I can’t start losing points in exams! I just can’t! I should have gotten an O in ‘Defence’. I should have done better in ‘Runes’.”

She was right, he didn’t understand. He was genuinely confused, he just couldn’t wrap his head around it. Hermione was the smartest witch he had ever known, including McGonagall and his mother. He knew it, Harry knew it. The entire faculty at Hogwarts knew it, and she was the only one oblivious to the fact that she was bloody brilliant.

“Why?” He asked eventually, after a long moment of silence filled only with dripping tap and Hermione’s shuddering breaths. “Why do you have to be the best at everything? You got 9 Outstandings and you're not even happy about those? You could’ve got 100% in every exam you ever did and do in your life and you still wouldn't be happy. You need to give yourself a break.”

“I can’t. I just- I just.” The tears began freefalling. Hermione was gasping in her hysteria and looked as if she was going to collapse to the ground any second.

He didn’t know if it was the distress of seeing her like that, or the fact that she really did look unsteady on her feet but before he could even think about it he did something he’d never done in the five years he’d known her - he pulled her into a hug.  And instead of reacting with horror and confusion like he was half convinced she would, she reciprocated quickly, wrapping her arms around his waist and sobbed into Ron’s t-shirt.

He didn’t like seeing people cry, he always felt uncomfortable and awkward and like he needed to run from the room immediately. Usually he did anyway. While he absolutely felt uncomfortable and out of his depth, the thought of leaving Hermione alone and upset in the state she was in outweighed everything.

They stood there for an unknown length of time, Ron holding onto her tightly and her clutching him as if he was her lifeline. He didn’t know how she did it, but she always managed to smell like ink and honey.

“I’m being silly.” She murmured after a minute.

“If it upsets you it's not silly.” Said Ron with a sensitive that surely didn’t belong to him.

“I just always feel like it's all going to get ripped away from me. I am constantly waiting for someone to realise they made a mistake. That I shouldn’t have gotten my letter and it was all one big joke. I always feel like I have just been lucky this whole time and don’t actually belong here. I’m scared every day that someone’s going to pull me away and tell me it was all some stupid mistake.”

“Don’t be daft Hermione, no one in the world could ever look at you and think you don't belong here.”

“But they do!” she squeaked. “There’s loads of people out there who not only don't think I should be here but want to kill me for it. I feel like I have to fight every day to prove that I am good enough. And I’m not. I’m never going to be good enough! That’s why I'm always so scared to fail exams. I don't want to give them any more ammunition or a chance to tell me I don't belong here. “

All of a sudden it was like every single ‘Hermione-ism” she’d ever exhibited made sense, the time she’d crammed in so many subjects she made herself ill from lack of sleep. The panic and obsession with good grades and her boggart telling her she was a failure.

“You do belong here Hermione. I know it’s not a lot coming from me, but you do. And me and Harry and Ginny and the entire bloody Order are willing to fight anyone who ever makes you feel like you don't.”

They didn’t speak for a while after that but after a few seconds of silence, Hermione’s breathing seemed to return to almost normal and after another couple of moments she pulled away. Eyes dry and once again standing steady on her own.

“Thanks Ron.”

“Don’t mention it.” He said with a smile and wrapped his arm around her shoulder. He had found it oddly nice to be that close to her, even if the circumstances were off. She was warm and shit nicely against him. Plus this is something friends did right? This was friendly? “Anyway Hermione, I really wouldn’t worry. I heard Dumbledore got a T in his ‘Care of’ OWL.”

“What?” She spluttered, looking up to meet his eye.

“Yeah.. His bird kept setting on fire.”

She laughed despite his terrible joke and smacked his stomach lightly. Ron laughed too, happy that she was happy again. Happy that he had made her happy again.

[wafflebloggies]

A Little Light Mischief

When you moved at the speed of light, boredom was a problem.

Mr. Flare hated being bored. He could find and experience the entire back catalogue of a YouTube channel in the time it took most people to type the first letter into the search bar. Information or entertainment, a good 99 percent of the content he devoured tended to slip straight through his consciousness without adhering to anything on the way through. He could read faster than a panicking defence attorney before an important court date, but books were for losers and it was hard to turn comic pages when you were a discorporate entity with no opposable thumbs.

Cartoons were okay, but watching twenty-four frames a second slapping lazily one over the other like a flip-book moving through treacle made him feel pretty queasy after a while. 

It was hard, being the world’s coolest lens artefact. Flare needed excitement, fun, drama. He liked to be in a place where things were moving and happening, bopping along, and for a while, things at Disillusion Industries had been slow, frustratingly predictable. A video would be produced, a video would be released. Despite his best efforts and clear charismatic radiance, a criminally low percentage of these videos starred or even featured Mr. Flare.

That was before the nerd had quit.

After that, everything got much more interesting. For a solid week, then two, then three and more, not even Mr. Flare could have predicted where D would be or what he’d be up to next. He might be spending days rendering obsessively accurate reconstructions of scenes from classic movies down in the edit bay, muttering furiously to himself the whole time, or he might be floating face down in the skypool, butt-naked apart from a pair of shutter shades and one waterlogged Yeezy. It was all pretty hilarious to watch, and when he thought about it, Flare had to admit that the nerd had only ever really been in the way. The last thing Disillusion Industries had needed, if you really looked at the bigger picture, was a methodical, anal-retentive wet blanket underfoot, harshing the buzz for everybody. Humans kind of sucked, it was a basic objective fact.

That was why when the email showed up, he’d been less than pleased.

Flare could see things the way the Captain could, by and large. He just did it better, clearer, and faster. Much faster. He could see the pink-white glow of an incoming message flicking down the tubes and jumping through routers and splitters, and he could catch up with it as it dawdled along, as easy as hopping on a slow-moving trolley. He could see the nerd’s digital fingerprints all over the thing, even before he read the actual body of the email.

Blah, blah, blah. Flare liked drama, but this was the snoozefest kind of drama, just feelings and reasonable statements, the kind that wouldn’t even make for a good commentary video. You couldn’t even leak this shit- nobody would care. Whatever the subject matter, it was another basic objective fact that the entertainment value in people discussing things calmly and rationally like adults was practically zero.

--Anyway, I know you’re probably mad at me, but I just wanted to say that it’s okay if you want to talk.

Ugh. Yawn-o-rama.

If Flare had had a tongue, he would have stuck it out good and far in disgust. The place had been way more fun for the last few weeks, without the nerd hanging around getting nerd-stink all over everything. For one, he’d taken the cat with him, and the cat had always been under the mistaken impression that Flare was a great thing to chase and try to stick in its stupid tuna-breath cat-mouth.

D was way more fun, too. He was explosive and weird- well, weirder- with a mood as stable as a revolving door falling through a black hole. It was a wild ride, like witnessing a very prolonged jet-ski accident in zero-gravity. It was fun. If the nerd came back, he’d probably clean up the entire epic record-breaking trashpile that had been accumulating on the bridge. He’d probably ask D to put some pants on. And he’d bring his goddamn cat.

Flare stretched his digital flex out thoughtfully through the ion stream surrounding the nerd’s message, and wrote.

--Go fuck yourself, fleshbag.

Direct and nicely to the point, but maybe a little OOC. Flare had been in enough serious erotic roleplays in his time to know the importance of properly finding one’s character. He flicked the draft out of existence and tried again.

--Listen, Alan, if you want to come crawling back just say so, but I’ll be honest, we’ve streamlined our workflow up here a lot over the last couple of months, and I’m not sure if I could find much for you to do right now. I should probably point out that I’m not your shrink and I don’t have time to help you work through your commitment issues or whatever.

P.S, you left your dumb cat’s treat pouches in the mess hall fridge. I can have them FedExed if you want, but the orbital courier fees are on you.

“Mr. Flare, you are a literary genius,” said Flare, admiring the message proudly from a couple picaseconds distance. The junction to D’s inbox was coming up, yawning like a highway off-ramp, so he sent his reply fizzing back towards its sender, and flipped the nerd’s email straight into the spam folder, snickering happily as he zipped away across the overflowing virtual landfill and into the real world.

[flirting-with-psychology]

1. I own a ferret. 2. My best friend is my boyfriend 3. My best friend is a girl 4. I use the word super way too much 5. I am a boy 6. I like My Chemical Romance 7. I own more than 100 CDs 8. I like discussing politics 9. I collect state quarters 10. The Legend of Zelda is my favorite video game. 11. I have Cingular 12. I love MAC makeup 13. I smoke too much 14. I own more than 5 bandanas 15. My favorite movie is Kill Bill 16. I watched Lamb Chop when I was young 17. I have my ears gauged 18. I can do HTML without guidance 19. I watch Spongebob Squarepants regularly. 20. I go to the movies at least once a week 21. I play guitar or bass 22. I love Elvis 23. I’ve had a mo/bi/trihawk before 24. I have met my favorite band 25. I like to hardcore dance 26. Something’s outside my window 27. I believe in ghosts 28. I do drugs regularly 29. I am straightedge 30. My favorite feature about myself is my lips 31. I have never consumed alcohol 32. I want a tattoo. 33. My favorite actor is Will Ferrell. 34. I have seen Conan O'Brien live. 35. I hate MTV 36. I used to watch Cheaters every week 37. I have my own vaccuum 38. Frank Sinatra is awesome 39. I sleep with a stuffed animal 40. I am scared of werewolves 41. I watch hockey regularly 42. I am originally from New York 43. I own an iPod 44. Some people aren’t funny. 45. I hate school. 46. My favorite vegetable is lettuce. 47. Tickle fights are fun. 48. I am currently unemployed. 49. I have my license 50. I hate spelling mistakes 51. I love Spanish class 52. I live in a big city 53. I have been to the Grand Canyon 54. I listen to music to fall asleep 55. I watch TV to fall asleep 56. I only get a few hours of sleep each night 57. I’m relatively innocent. 58. I am a size 3 or smaller 59. I’m bored. 60. Purple is my favorite color. 61. I hate flossing 62. I have a car. 63. I believe in God 64. I’m in love. 65. I used to love Unwritten Law. 66. Reno 911 is my favorite show. 67. There is a mini stapler on my computer desk. 68. Cuddling’s my favorite. 69. For sure. 70. I have a flip phone 71. I love my handwriting 72. I own a Louis Vuitton handbag 73. I want to be an astronaut. 74. I love the song Dragostea Din Tei 75. 50 Cent is not talented 76. I like scanners better than digital cameras. 77. I own at least one Punk-O-Rama CD 78. My room is sound proof. 79. I’m 5'5 or less 80. Lying pisses me off 81. I backstab people. 82. I have been in a fist fight. 83. I have PaintShop Pro. 84. It’s almost midnight 85. My nightlight is cracked 86. I only listen to Dashboard Confessional when I’m sad 87. And I feel like a pansy when I do so 88. I hate metal 89. I’m in a band. 90. Napoleon Dynamite is annoying now. 91. I love hickeys 92. I want to lose weight 93. My favorite channel is the Food Network. 94. I don’t have a CD burner. 95. Pixar is stupid except for the Incredibles 96. I own an apartment/house 97. I am engaged. 98. My computer’s a Gateway. 99. I hate driving. 100. I like watching boys sleep. =========================== 01. I miss someone right now 02. I don’t watch much TV these days 03. I love olives 04. I love sleeping 05. I own lots of books 06. I wear glasses or contact lenses 07. I love to play video games 08. I’ve tried marijuana 09. I’ve watched porn movies 10. I have been in a threesome 11. I have been the psycho-ex in a past relationship 12. I believe honesty is usually the best policy 13. I have acne free skin usually 14. I like and respect Al Sharpton 15. I curse frequently 16. I have changed a lot mentally over the last year 17. I have a hobby 18. I’ve been told I can suck the chromes off a trailer hitch. 19. I carry my knife/razor everywhere with me 20. I’m smart 21. I’ve never broken someone’s bones 22. I have a secret that I am ashamed to reveal 23. I hate the rain 24. I’m paranoid at times 25. I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scars. 26. I need money right now! 27. I love Sushi 28. I talk really, really fast sometimes 29. I have fresh breath in the morning 30. I have semi-long hair 31. I have lost money in Las Vegas 32. I have at least one brother and/or one sister 33. I was born in a country outside of the U.S. 34. I shave my legs 35. I have a twin 36. I have worn fake hair/fingernails/eyelashes in the past 37. I couldn’t survive without Caller I.D. 38. I like the way that I look sometimes 39. I have lied to a good friend in the last 6 months 40. I know how to do cornrows 41. I am usually pessimistic 42. I have a lot of mood swings 43. I think prostitution should be legalized 44. I think Britney Spears is hot 45. I have cheated on a significant other in the past 46. I have a hidden talent 47. I’m always hyper no matter how much sugar I have. 48. I think that I’m popular 49. I am currently single 50. I have kissed someone of the same sex 51. I enjoy talking on the phone 52. I practically live in sweatpants or PJ pants 53. I love to shop. 54. I would rather shop than eat 55. I would classify myself as ghetto. 56. I’m bourgie and have worn a sweater tied around my shoulders 57. I’m obsessed with my Livejournal 58. I don’t hate anyone. 59. I’m a pretty good dancer 60. I don’t think Mike Tyson raped Desiree Washington 61. I’m completely embarrassed to be seen with my mother 62. I have a cell phone 63. I believe in God/ a higher being. 64. I watch MTV/Vh1 on a daily basis 65. I have passed out drunk in the past 6 months 66. I love drama. 67. I have never been in a real romantic relationship before 68. I’ve rejected someone before 69. I currently have a crush on someone 70. I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life 71. I want to have children in the future 72. I have changed a diaper before 73. I’ve called the cops on a friend before 74. I bite my nails 75. I am a member of the Tom Green fan club 76. I’m not allergic to anything 77. I have a lot to learn 78. I have dated someone at least 10 years older or younger 79. I plan on seeing Ice Cube’s newest “Friday” movie 80. I am sometimes shy around the opposite sex 81. I’m online 24/7, even as an away message 82. I have at least 5 away messages saved 83. I have tried alcohol or drugs before 84. I have made a move on a friend’s significant other in the past 85. I own the “South Park” movie 86. I have avoided assignments at work/school to be on Xanga or Livejournal 87. When I was a kid I played “the birds and the bees” with a neighbor or chum 88. I enjoy some country music 90. I think that Pizza Hut has the best pizza 91. I watch soap operas whenever I can 92. I’m obsessive, anal retentive, and often a perfectionist 93. I have used my sexuality to advance my career 94. I love Michael Jackson, scandals and all 95. I know all the words to Slick Rick’s “Children’s Story” 96. Halloween is awesome because you get free candy 97. I watch Spongebob Squarepants and I like it 98. I have dated a close friend’s ex 99. I’m happy as of this moment 100. I was born in the 80s but I am truly a child of the 90s  101. I have slapped john dasaro and chris burke in the face..on the same night 102. I haven’t showered in two days… and I like it. 103. i own every f***er here 104. I procrastinate all the time 105. I’m a nerd 106. I LOVE the movie The Wedding Singer. 107. i hate corn. 108. i’ve attended the rocky horror picture show 109. i’ve never seen Bambi the movie 110. Thinking about the future terrifies me 111. Without music there would be no point in living. 112. If I could change one thing about myself I would 113. If someone of the same sex liked me, I would date them. 114. I went to the mall today for 5 hours ================================ Would do Have Done

001. Bought everyone in the pub a drink 002. Swam with wild dolphins 003. Climbed a mountain *004. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive 005. Been inside the Great Pyramid 006. Held a tarantula. *007. Taken a candlelit bath with someone 008. Said ‘I love you’ and meant it. 009. Hugged a tree *010. Done a striptease 011. Bungee jumped *012. Visited Paris 013. Watched a lightning storm at sea *014. Stayed up all night long, and watch the sun rise several times *015. Seen the Northern Lights 016. Gone to a huge sports game 017. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa *018. Grown and eaten your own vegetables *019. Touched an iceberg *020. Slept under the stars 021. Changed a baby’s diaper 022. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon *023. Watched a meteor shower *024. Gotten drunk on champagne *025. Given more than you can afford to charity 026. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope 027. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment 028. Had a food fight 029. Bet on a winning horse 030. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill 031. Asked out a stranger 032. Had a snowball fight 033. Photocopied your bottom on the office photocopier 034. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can 035. Held a lamb 036. Organized and planned a surprise party for a loved one *037. Taken a midnight skinny dip 038. Taken an ice cold bath 039. Had a meaningful conversation with a beggar 040. Seen a total eclipse 041. Ridden a roller coaster 042. Hit a home run 043. Fit three weeks miraculously into three days 044. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking *045. Adopted an accent for an entire day 046. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors 047. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment *048. Had two hard drives for your computer *049. Visited all 50 states 050. Loved your job for all accounts *051. Taken care of someone who was really sick *052. Had enough money to be truly satisfied 053. Had amazing friends 054. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country *055. Watched wild whales 056. Stolen a sign 057. Backpacked in Europe *058. Taken a road-trip 059. Rock climbing 060. Lied to foreign government’s official in that country to avoid notice *061. Midnight walk on the beach 062. Sky diving *063. Visited Ireland 064. Been heartbroken longer then you were actually in love 065. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger’s table and had a meal with them *066. Visited Japan 067. Bench pressed your own weight 068. Milked a cow 069. Alphabetized your records 070. Pretended to be a superhero 071. Sung karaoke 072. Lounged around in bed all day 073. Protested something you feel strongly against 074. Scuba diving *075. Got it on to “Let’s Get It On” by Marvin Gaye 076. Kissed in the rain 077. Played in the mud 078. Played in the rain *079. Gone to a drive-in theater 080. Done something you should regret, but don’t regret *081. Visited the Great Wall of China 082. Discovered that someone who’s not supposed to have known about your blog has discovered your blog 083. Dropped Windows in favor of something better 084. Started a business 085. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken 086. Toured ancient sites 087. Taken a martial arts class 088. Swordfought for the honor of a woman 089. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight *090. Gotten married 091. Been in a movie 092. Crashed a party 093. Loved someone you shouldn’t have *094. Kissed someone so passionately it made them dizzy 095. Gotten divorced 096. Started an office war 097. Gone without food for 5 days 098. Made cookies from scratch 099. Won first prize in a costume contest 100. Ridden a gondola in Venice 101. Gotten a tattoo 102. Found that the texture of some materials can turn you on 103. Rafted the Snake River 104. Been on television news programs as an “expert" 105. Got flowers for no reason 106. Made out in a public place 107. Got so drunk you don’t remember anything 108. Been addicted to some form of illegal drug 109. Performed on stage 110. Been to Las Vegas 111. Recorded music 112. Eaten shark *113. Drank an entire 6 pack by yourself *114. Gone to Thailand 115. Seen Siouxsie *116. Bought a house 117. Been in a combat zone 118. Buried one/both of your parents 119. Shaved all of your hair off *120. Been on a cruise ship 121. Spoken more than one language fluently 122. Gotten into a fight while attempting to defend someone 123. Bounced a check 124. Performed in theatre 125. Read - and understood - your credit report *126. Raised children 127. Recently bought and played with a favorite childhood toy *128. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour *129. Created and named your own constellation of stars 130. Taken a bicycle tour in a foreign country 131. Found out something significant that your ancestors did 132. Called or written your Congress person 133. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over 135. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge 136. Sang loudly in the car, and didn’t stop when you knew someone was looking 137. Had an abortion 138. Had plastic surgery 139. Survived an accident that you shouldn’t have survived 140. Wrote articles for a large publication 141. Lost over 100 pounds 142. Held someone while they were having a flashback 143. Piloted an airplane 144. Petted a stingray 145. Broken someone’s heart 146. Helped an animal give birth 147. Been fired or laid off from a job 148. Won money on a TV game show 149. Broken a bone 150. Killed a human being *151. Gone on an African photo safari 152. Ridden a motorcycle 153. Driven any land vehicle at a speed of greater than 100mph 154. Had a body part of yours below the neck pierced 155. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol 156. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild 157. Ridden a horse 158. Had major surgery 159. Ridden on a passenger train 160. Had a snake as a pet 161. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon 162. Slept through an entire flight: takeoff, flight, and landing 163. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours 164. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states *165. Visited all 7 continents 166. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days 167. Eaten kangaroo meat 168. Fallen in love at an ancient Mayan burial ground 169. Been a sperm or egg donor 170. Eaten sushi 171. Had your picture in the newspaper 172. Had 2 (or more) healthy romantic relationships for over a year in your lifetime *173. Changed someone’s mind about something you care deeply about 174. Gotten someone fired for their actions 175. Gone back to school 176. Parasailed 177. Changed your name 178. Petted a cockroach 179. Eaten fried green tomatoes 180. Read The Iliad 181. Selected one "important” author who you missed in school, and read 182. Dined in a restaurant and stolen silverware, plates, cups because your apartment needed them 183. …and gotten 86'ed from the restaurant because you did it so many times, they figured out it was you 184. Taught yourself an art from scratch 185. Killed and prepared an animal for eating 186. Apologized to someone years after inflicting the hurt *187. Skipped all your school reunions 188. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language 189. Been elected to public office 190. Written your own computer language 191. Thought to yourself that you’re living your dream 192. Had to put someone you love into hospice care 193. Built your own PC from parts 194. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn’t know you 195. Had a booth at a street fair 196: Dyed your hair blue 197: Been a DJ 198: Found out someone was going to dump you via LiveJournal 199: Written your own role playing game 200: Been arrested ====================== 1. I have self-mutilated before. 2. I still love the song Dragostea Din Tei 3. I used to like New Kids on the Block 4. The 80s was funny. 5. I have realtones enabled on my cellular phone. 6. Public bathrooms scare me 7. I have keys on my belt 8. I’m not wearing a belt 9. I hate writing 10. I hate reading 1. I love compilation CDs 12. My favorite teachers have all been guys 13. I think Bad Religion’s only been around for ten or so years 14. I don’t know who Bad Religion is. 15. I don’t wear my hood unless it’s raining 16. I enjoy smaller clubs rather than big ones 17. I’ve put a song on repeat for more than 8 hours 18. I have sound on my computer  19. Someone wants my hiney. 20. My mom loves Elvis 21. I have my own computer 22. I live on the east coast 23. My favorite animal is a kangaroo 24. I’m on vacation 25. I don’t own a pair of ripped jeans 26. I am very insecure somewhat 27. I love to dance 28. I curse way too much. 29. I choose the pansy way and star out my curse words (f*ck) 30. I feel dumb because I was just called a pansy 31. I have a flatscreen computer 32. I collect something. 33. I’m married 34. I won’t date someone who’s smaller than me smaller, as in also shorter? 35. Brass knuckles are the shit. 36. I own a hand puppet 37. I write with blue pens 38. I wear eye makeup almost every day 39. I wish I lived somewhere other than here 40. I don’t own a band shirt. Not yet anyway.. 41. I love techno. 42. I have my nipples pierced 43. I’m shitty at wrapping presents 44. I know someone in the KKK 45. I’m racist/anti-semitist. 46. I don’t know what those mean. 47. I love life most of the time 48. I have posters all over my room 49. I’ve never been a camera whore with someone.. And I want to. 50. I’m halfway done 51. I wish I lived in the 80s 52. I know what the term borgie means 53. I’m interested in social hierarchy. 54. I love music videos. 55. I have a DVD player 56. I’m drunk right now 57. I’m listening to music 58. I have a big screen TV 59. I have an STD 60. I know the singer of the Clash’s name 61. The only IM program I have is AIM 62. I skateboard regularly 63. I live on the north side of town 64. I have been to Alaska 65. I’ve worn a cowboy hat 66. I watch late night infomercials for retarded, unnecessary things 67. I LOVE DOING THE DEATH GROWL TO MY FAVORITE METAL SONGS. 68. That last question was dumb. 69. I know what the word “peligroso” means in English 70. I speak another language fluently 71. I’ve been in a limo 72. I own a bong 73. My lungs hurt 74. I know someone who’s committed suicide 75. I’ve got a six pack and I don’t need you! 76. I know what band sung the above line 77. I like strong boys. 78. I’m sick right now 79. I know someone who’s currently enlisted in the army 80. I do not own a color phone 81. My birthday is in September 82. I hate mall cops 83. I hate most cops in general 84. I’m wearing blush 85. I live in an apartment 86. I’m still in high school. 87. I own something from Victoria’s Secret 88. I don’t know a boy that wears girls pants 89. I’ve had the same best friend since I was 8. 90. Brownies are my favorite 91. So is cake 92. I’ve heard the song “Looks Good in Leather” 93. I own some sort of propaganda, fake or real 94. I deny the Holocaust happened 95. Kisses are my favorite sign of affection 96. I need to charge my phone 97. My purse could pass for a suitcase 98. I take birth control 99. I only buy what’s fashionable

1. I love bolding 2. I know someone named Mimi 3. I hate my old best friend 4. My favorite alcoholic drink is Jack n Coke 5. I have a digital camera 6. I’m talking to at least one person online 7. I like watching college basketball 8. I have never moved. 9. I have at least one cat 10. I have at least one dog 11. I’m going to see a movie tonight maybe 12. I make my own AIM icons 13. I’m in pain 14. I watch more than five shows a day 15. I love the Cure 16. My parents like some of the same music I do 17. I have never been to the dentist 18. I listen to the radio 19. I do my own laundry 20. I’ve made at least one article of clothing 21. I have/want something on my face pierced 22. I go to at least one concert a week 23. I’ve written a story 24. I’ve dyed my hair every color of the rainbow 25. I own a Grand Theft Auto game 26. My favorite pattern is camoflauge 27. I know someone who does/did cocaine 28. I have too many game systems 29. I love scary movies 30. I hate scary movies 31. I’ve had sex more than 5 times 32. My favorite chips are Lays Original 33. I think butter is unhealthy 34. I hate the Osbournes 35. I used to have dreadlocks 36. I need to take medicine for something 37. I suffer from insomnia 38. I speak ebonics 39. I’ve gambled 40. And won 41. I have at least one gay friend 42. I like going to pet stores 43. I own a dog toy 44. And I don’t have a dog 45. I own more than ten candles 46. I’ve smoked a cigarette in the shower before 47. I’ve flunked a class 48. I listen to music every day 49. I have more than one nickname 50. I wear pajamas when I feel like it 51. I’m wearing more than one jewelry item 52. I haven’t washed my hair in a week 53. I watch the Grammy’s every year 54. Along with the Macy’s Parade 55. My favorite season is winter 56. I have seen the All American Rejects live 57. And I’ve enjoyed it. 58. Boobs are nothing special 59. I go swimming at least once a week in summer. 60. I have a pool. 61. I’ve gone skinnydipping 62. I’ve played strip poker 63. And lost 64. I want a nautical star tattoo 65. My cell phone turns off when it’s charging 66. And it pisses me off 67. I used to buy my entire wardrobe from Hot Topic 68. I’ve been to albinoblacksheep.com 69. My favorite subject is History 70. And/or math 71. I am a republican 72. I am a democrat 73. I listen to the Used occasionally 74. I have been to the Warped Tour 75. I am part Mexican 76. I am part German 77. All of my grandparents are still alive. 79. I love bowling 80. I know that there is a South Park, Colorado 81. I love Dairy Queen 82. Sometimes I think I’m crazy 83. I own a Moffatts CD 84. I own a Backstreet Boys CD 85. I want plastic surgery 86. Operation, operation, snip and tie, snip and tie 87. I know what song that line is from 88. I have killed something [bugs!] 89. I’ve never had a Nokia cell phone 90. I’m never sarcastic 91. Light eyes turn me on 92. I have never been to a foreign country 93. I don’t eat enough 94. I own illegal weaponry 95. I know someone who has overdosed on something 96. And lived to tell about it 97. I don’t own a pair of mittens 98. I love the heat 99. I’ve never had a steady boyfriend/gf 100. I want to makeout.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #276

“all the other kids with the pumped up kicks, you better run, better run, outrun my gun.”

Favorite dried fruit? Dried fruit is fucking disgusting. Would you rather wear a dress or a suit on your wedding day? A dress. If you chose dress, will it be long or short? I prefer longer wedding dresses. If you chose suit, will you wear a bow or a tie? Hypothetically I’d wear a tie, probably. Have you ever wanted to be a police officer? No. Do you have a nut allergy? No. Do you accessories with chains? Put chains on fucking EVERYTHING and it is an improvement. How often do you cook dinner? If you’re excluding the microwave, like… never. What have you given up on recently? Nothing important; the only thing I can think of applies to a game. I was after the way-too-fucking-expensive dinosaur mount that is very soon going away in World of Warcraft, but the stress it was causing me wasn’t worth it. The time investment and how it was only a “maybe” of getting it in time Favorite condiment for fries? Ketchup. Ever had bangs? I did as a little kid. Do you know any Italian people? Well yeah, people of Italian descent are common in the U.S. I don’t know like, someone straight from Italy though. Have you ever dated someone LGBTQ+? Yeah, a demisexual. What color would you like your future bathroom to be? Uh… I don’t really care. It would depend on the house. Do you add sugar to plain cornflakes? No. Are skeletons cool? Skellyboiz are dope. Favorite Selena Gomez song? I don’t know any. Do you like coffee flavored cake? I don’t like coffee, so guess. Is that even a thing, though? Do you still watch your favorite kid shows/cartoons? I don’t watch TV. I would though, sure. Do you like going on walks? What's your favorite thing about them? How far do you normally walk? Ugh this question is gonna be embarrassing considering I went through muscle atrophy in my legs from being so sedentary. When we move (HOPEFULLY the start of October, a wrench was kinda thrown in our plans), I intend to absolutely start walking in small intervals now that we’ll be in a nice little neighborhood with a sidewalk. And a PokeStop nearby to bait me lmfao. Plus the weather will be cooler, so I intend to make a lot of progress. BUT ANYWAY I like just listening to either music or the sounds of what’s going on around me. Last time you had a hot drink? That’s a good question. Idk. Have you ever lived in a city? Was it crowded? Never like… a “real” city. Just small towns or in the middle of nowhere. Would you prefer to live in a big city or the woods? THE WOODS!!!!!!1 THE WOODS!!!!!1!!!!1111!! GIMME THAT SHIT!!!!!!11!11!!!! Have you ever climbed a mountain? No. Do you hear owls or crickets at night where you live? LOADS of crickets and toads during the summer. Ever run away from home? When I was a stupid pre-teen. I was mad at my mom and she wasn’t home, so I took Teddy and left. I had my phone though and Mom – when she got home – threatened to call the cops, so yeah, I came back. Are you scared to ride public transport alone? Why? No. Is marriage on your mind? No time soon. Did you own a dollhouse when you were younger? I didn’t, per se, but my younger sister did, and we would play together. Does the room you're in have a tiled floor? No, it’s carpet. How many pairs of earrings do you own? Not that many, not too few. Are you looking for a boyfriend/girlfriend? I’ve never thought *looking* was a good idea, so no. I think bonds of any kind need to come naturally to avoid lack of genuineness, force, or rush. I don’t think me having an s/o is a smart idea right now anyway. Do you prefer a call or a text? Don’t call me unless you’re dying or something. Do your parents drink coffee every morning? Mom almost always does. I don’t live with Dad, so idk. Have you ever donated blood? Yes. One song that's meaningful to you? UM a LOT. Most meaningful, probably “Stairway To Heaven” by Led Zeppelin. I physically can’t listen to it. Like I refuse to. Are you addicted to anything? Technology, big oof energy. What were you last listening to in the car? Something on my iPod, idk. When was the last time you sang out loud? I don’t recall. I rarely sing. What did you have for breakfast? A microwaveable sausage, egg, and cheese biscuit. Mom is currently out of state with her mother because she’s literally on her deathbed, so she STOCKED ME THE FUCK UP on groceries. The freezer is literally jam-packed, so I’m focusing on eating food from there. Did you have a nap today? Yes. I almost never, ever make it through the day without one, especially now with having nightmares every fucking time I sleep. Are you named after anyone? No. Well, not my first name, anyway. “Marie” is a middle name theme in my family, though. What kind of music do you like? Metal, rock, alternative, indie… stuff like that. What’s one hobby that you’d like to take up? Ugh, I miss a LOT of my old hobbies. I’ve lost interest in so much. I wish I drew way more than I do, which is almost never. What did you think you wanted to be when you grew up? The first job I ever wanted was a paleontologist. I was obsessed with dinosaurs. Still love ‘em. What’s the biggest project on your to-do list right now? It’d be great if I could finish designing Ashley’s cancer tattoo, but again, yeah, drawing motivation. ;_; If you weren’t in your current job, what would you want to be doing? I’m unemployed. Is the last person you kissed older than you? No. Are you happy right now? No. Haven’t been “happy” for a while now. Who makes you happiest right now? Probably my cat tbh lol. Especially being home alone for so long, he’s keeping me company. In school did/do people put a label on you? If so, what is/was it? I was considered one of the “emo” kids. Do you laugh every day? lol wow no. What is the last thing you laughed at? This Spongebob meme I saw on Facebook got me fuckin good. Have you cried today? If so, why? Nah. When was the last time someone saw you naked? Been a long time; even when I’m going in or coming out of the shower I do all I can for Mom to not see me because I hate my body a fucking lot. What is the greatest loss you've endured? My first boyfriend. When was the last time you did something you were embarrassed by? WOW I do this like every fuckin day, fam. What was the last thing you lied about? I’m not sure. What type of a drunk are you? Never gotten to the point of drunk, but I was more talkative the closest I got. What is your philosophy on life/how do you generally choose to live or conduct yourself? What a big question. I personally think you should do all you can to make a positive impact on the world – make it better than when you entered. Don’t contribute to the bad, treat people how you want to be treated… all that jazz. When was the last time you were up all night and why? I can’t remember quite why, but I remember doing that with WoW some time ago. Idr what I was doing that had my attention that long, though. That’s rare now. What is the worst thing you've done to yourself? What is the worst thing someone else has done to you? Part one: hand over all of my worth to someone else. Part two: show me exactly why I shouldn’t have in a very unhealthy way. What is the most personal thing you're willing to reveal? I dunno??? Can ya give me a topic?? Is there a situation or person you haven't been able to get over/forgive/what have you? I honestly doubt I’ll ever be entirely over Jason. Who was the last person to yell at you? Did you yell back? Probably Mom, and idr. Doubt it. Just probably raised my voice. Where did your last injury come from? My cat, rip. What is the worst thing you have said to another person? Something along the lines of “thanks for sending me to the ER (or mental hospital?) again.” Fucking disgusting. Do you wear your seatbelt in the car? Without fail, always. Please wear your seatbelt. Are you scared of flying? Not really. What do you sleep in? Men’s pj pants and tank tops. Who was the last person you kissed? Sara. What are you listening to? I am fucking HOOKED on 3TEETH's cover of "Pumped Up Kicks." Do you prefer soupy noodles or noodles without the broth? Without. Have you ever missed someone but felt like they had other friends and didn't miss you as much as you did? This. Is the story of my motherfuckin life. I feel this all the time to a very deep level. Who, out of all your friends, do you hang with the most and could never get tired of him/her? Sara. Do you like the taste of white chocolate or does it taste kind of fake? Nooot a white chocolate fan. Too sweet. How would you react if you just found out your mom had an abortion before? I would be VERY surprised just given who she is and her adoration for children. Are your pets spayed/neutered? Yes. Hottest guy you know and actually talk to? I don’t regularly talk to any guy I consider “hot,” but the closest to that would be my friend Leon, whom I’ve always seen as very attractive. It is fucking UNCANNY, his resemblance to Leon Kennedy from the Resident Evil series. Like he’s dressed as him before and it is astonishing. Name sharing is a coincidence, too. What time of day do you like to shower? I don’t have a favored time anymore. I just do it when I feel like it at some point during the day, but pretty much never night anymore. I do think starting the morning with one though is great, though. When you go out to eat, what sides do your order with your food? Fries are almost guaranteed, but of course it depends on the type of food, too. What do you spend more money than necessary on? I don’t and never have had a stable source of income to answer this, really. What video game or computer game are you best at? Uhhh I’d probably be rusty with the Shadow of the Colossus controls by now, I’ve don’t have the maps or every puzzles memorized from the Silent Hill games, so I guess my answer’s World of Warcraft if I’m on my hunter. Not to flex but I’m a bomb-ass beast mastery hunter. Been my main in the game since I started in MoP. What do you keep your keys on? They’re in my purse on a keychain. Is your favorite color different than your favorite color to wear? Oh yeah. Do you buy books or get them from the library? Buy them. What section of the food pyramid do you neglect the most? Veggies for sure. What do you use your stovetop for most? Well, I don’t ever. Can you focus on studying if there's music on? No, I need silence. In what types of situations do you demand absolute silence? Well, see the above answer, for one. Also going to sleep. Well, maybe not, as I have a fan as kinda like white noise, but I can sleep without it. Did you do well at fitness testing in grade school? I didn’t score bad, but I wasn’t exceptional either. Do you own more shoes or less shoes than the average person? Less, I’m sure. Do you still have anything from when you were a baby? Yeah, up in the attic. I think my mom has some stuff that’s super important to her in a case somewhere. Do you use hairspray much? I never do. Are art museums interesting or boring to you? I enjoy them. What subject in school do you feel is the least necessary? Well, this is a difficult question to answer when you consider I think depending on your career focus as well as personal values and interests, this answer changes from person to person. Like for me, I could say I don’t give a shit about complex math, but advanced math courses would be valued by certain people down specific paths. But anyway, I’ll bite and say least necessary for *the most* people, in my opinion anyway. Gym. It’s very discriminatory towards people with more limited physical capabilities (and I don’t just mean literally disabled), and it’s also just very uncomfortable and/or embarrassing to some people. Like I’d fuckin cry if in my current state, I was forced to “run” a mile, because I physically couldn’t come even close. A person, a younger one especially, should never be subjected to humiliation at the hands of a class schools deem “necessary” when it absolutely is not. Okay I’m in a talkative mood and this is turning into an essay so I’mma move along now. When you were a kid, what games did you always play on the playground? I think for as long as I had recess, my go-to was ALWAYS the swings. I fucking loved swingsets. I loved playing 4 Square or whatever it was called. And then of course there was me digging tunnels in the sandboxes because I wanted to feel like a meerkat lmfao. Do you enjoy power outages or do you get annoyed? For some reason, I still have this childlike excitement *early* into a power outage. Especially when it’s dark and we have to get out the candles, and I might play my old GameBoy or Nintendo DS, or I’ll probably just chill talking with Mom. However, that phase is pretty short nowadays, being a snake mama. My mind very quickly goes back to “Venus needs her lamp,” so as time passes, I get more anxious than annoyed. Basically, I’d rather not have one. Do you know how to use an ATM? … no lmao How about write a check? No. Are you pretty politically correct? To a degree I consider reasonable. Personally I find political correctness as having gone too far by now, but it’s certainly appropriate in some instances. What is one fashion trend you'll never understand? I… don’t really care to think much on this. Wear what makes you feel confident in yourself. There are things I think don’t look good, but they may look great to you, and it’s on your body, so guess whose opinion matters. What do you wear when you exercise? Oh yeesh. Just sweatpants and a tank top, normally. What is usually the last thing you do before you go to bed? I turn the brightness on my phone waaay down. I’m always going to wake up throughout the night and check the time, but I don’t want to be blinded.

[imaginejamesandsirius]

Post prank angst please!? Maybe a depressed Sirius, who hates himself and won’t talk to the others (even though they’ve forgiven him) and one day James snaps? I know you’ve done something similar before but please more angst! Love your work so much, have your notifications on and everything!

((A/N: Warning for depression per the prompt)) 

It was one thing to know he was, at his core, a terrible person. It was quite another to actually have proof of it. Sirius had always been selfish and uncaring. He liked what he liked, and he held onto it with obsessive focus; everything else could burn and he would gladly strike the match. 

He knew that's what he was like. 

But he had hoped that James would never find that. 

He'd hoped that Remus and Peter would never get hurt because of it. It shouldn't have been a sodding surprise, what he did, yet it was. 

He'd apologised to Remus the morning after, when he was pale and shaky in his Hospital Wing bed. He'd said something that felt entirely insincere even though he'd meant it. "I'm sorry." Two little words that might as well have been spoken to a leaf for all the good it did. 

It didn't matter that Remus had muttered, "It's okay," because that's what Remus had to say. Remus knew that he was the nicest of them, and if he didn't say that everything was okay between them, what was going to happen? They all shared a dorm, they'd been best mates since first year, and they'd made themselves even closer from all the pranks and study sessions and full moon runs. And Sirius had buggered it all up because he couldn't control himself from pissing someone off. 

*

"Hey Sirius, we're going down to the Great Lake, you wanna come?" Peter asked. 

"'m fine." He needed to get the essay for McGonagall done. Normally he and James did their essays together since it helped him from being boring, and he had someone to check word spelling with without having to move. 

"Oh," he said, obviously surprised. Apparently Peter had thought of the invitation as a mere formality, and not the offer that Sirius had taken it as. Whatever, he still wasn't going. "Er, okay. See you when we get back, then." 

"Mmhmm." 

*

He either couldn't get any sleep these days, or sleeping was all he wanted to do. Today was a no-sleeping sort of night. His eyes were open, and there was only the faint hint of shapes in the darkness of the dormitory. He'd checked the time a while ago, and he'd been laying there for two hours. His arm was starting to get sore though, so he rolled onto his back and flicked his wand again. Another hour and a half. 

Sirius blew out a breath and knew that he wouldn't get to sleep just by laying in bed for another three hours. He rolled over again to the edge of the bed and swung his legs out. The cold of the stone floor ached something sharp, but he shoved himself up to stand and started for the door to the stairs even while his legs tried to give out from under him. 

*

"Sirius?" James called as he entered the dormitory. Sirius couldn't see him from his position under the bed, and even if he could, he wouldn't have responded. "You in here mate?" He heard James's footsteps go towards the loo, then back out. "I could've sworn," James muttered, and then there was the shuffling of parchment. Sirius had the sinking feeling that he was looking at the Marauders' Map, and that feeling was confirmed a moment later. "Sirius, I know you're in here, c'mon, I wanted to talk to you about a new prank." 

A new prank? Seriously? How could James even think about wanting to involve Sirius in something like that again? If he wasn't hiding under the bed right now, he'd get up and leave. Why was James looking for him in the first place? They'd tried the best mate thing and... well look how that turned out. It had been a bloody disaster at the end, and it would surely only get worse if they tried to keep it going. Maybe Remus was unwilling to split the group, but Sirius knew it needed to happen. With Remus, Peter, and James all acting like they wanted to remain in the friendship like nothing had changed, he was the only one capable of putting it in motion. Which was stupid, because he wasn't the responsible one here, someone else definitely should've done this for him. 

James's feet were right in front of his snout, and Sirius could practically hear the confusion in the air. A moment later though, and James was kneeling down and peering under the bed. His expression softened when he saw Padfoot. "Hullo love." 

It hurt. Merlin, why did James have to call him that? It was bad enough that he called him 'love' when they were friends and not anything more, but to do it when Sirius was trying to avoid him? He whined, shuffling back. He didn't go far, just a centimeter or two, and it didn't even help because James was reaching out a hand and petting his head. 

"Something scare you?" 

That was a fair guess since that's usually why Sirius transformed when he was all by himself, but no, this time he'd been feeling kinda shitty so he'd crawled under and hoped to waste away the day. He hadn't done any of his homework. Flitwick would be disappointed and ask him if maybe he'd just needed another day or two? He didn't want to go to classes anymore. He didn't want to keep crawling into bed only to have to crawl out so soon afterwards; it wasn't worth it, he might as well stay awake the whole night-- which he had done before. 

James was waiting for a response, so Sirius's lip curled back and he growled. James didn't remove his hand, but he looked more sad than before. "Hey," he said softly, a gentle reproach like Sirius needed to be talked to quietly or he'd have a breakdown. That wasn't true; Sirius was fine, if a little tired. "I could really use your help on this one, you wanna come out?" 

No, of course he fucking didn't. He growled louder before turning his head away. 

"Sirius," he said, sounding heartbroken, "c'mon." He touched at one of Padfoot's shoulders, and Sirius snapped his teeth at him. Not close enough to be of any real danger, but a big sign that he wanted to be left alone. Thankfully, James took it this time. He sighed, retracting his hand. "Fine. If you change your mind, I'll be in the library. I'll have the mirror on me if you need anything, okay?" 

Sirius didn't react, and after another moment James left. Why the hell was he trying so hard? Sirius knew his own value, and it... well, to put it bluntly, it wasn't much. His parents had disowned him, and the only reason he hadn't starved to death before the school year started was because James and his family had taken him in. He should probably start looking for new places to stay-- maybe with Uncle Alphard, who'd always had a soft spot for him-- but maybe by the time summer hit it wouldn't matter. 

*

Sirius woke up, pulled the covers over his head, and fell back asleep. 

"Sirius, are you still asleep?" Peter asked. "Class is in an hour, you need to get up to eat." 

He didn't bother to respond to that, knowing that Peter would leave him alone if he got ignored. 

"Sirius?" he tried one more time, then walked away to keep getting ready. "Suit yourself, mate." They'd made an agreement back in first year that if someone didn't get up on time, you were obligated to try once, and then it was their own damn fault. 

He managed to relax a little after that, secure in the belief that no one was going to try again. Of course, that was because he'd forgotten how bloody annoying James could be. Remus and Peter left, and Sirius had thought that yes, now he'd be able to get back to sleep again. He hadn't realised that James stayed behind until he was shaking Sirius's shoulder gently. "C'mon Sirius. I know you want to keep sleeping, but we've got class soon and you're grumpy when you don't eat breakfast." 

Sirius rather stubbornly stayed where he was. 

James shook him harder. "Sirius, I'm not joking. Get up." 

"Go 'way." 

"No. Get up, we need to get going." He tugged the blanket down so it was no longer covering Sirius's head. 

Sirius was about a hair's breadth from killing someone just so he could get back to sleep. The room was garishly bright, and now he was getting cold. All he fucking wanted was to not be tired and to be warm, and James was ruining that for him. Sirius snatched at the duvet to get it back, and James let him take it with a bewildered expression on his face. 

"Are you feeling alright? Are you sick?" he asked, pressing a hand to Sirius's forehead. 

"I'm fine," he snapped, slapping James's hand. 

There was a pause, and then James said, "Okay. I'll see you in Potions then-" their first class of the day, that Sirius had zero intention of attending "-and I'll grab something for you so you're not starving till lunch." 

How nice, Sirius thought snidely. 

*

Sirius kinda wanted to lay in the sun by the lake the rest of the day, kinda wanted to crawl back into the dormitory where it was nice and dark so he could get some sleep. He'd slept for a while last night, but when he got up that morning it hadn't felt restful. He almost didn't see what the bloody point was of sleeping if he wasn't going to feel better, but at least he didn't have to think when he was asleep. 

Sometimes he wanted to get all his homework done so he'd have something to do, other times he didn't see what the sodding point was since it's not like any of this mattered. Good job Sirius, get an O in Charms, that'll totally help you out in life even though your entire family figured out you were useless by the time you were eleven. None of it mattered yeah, but it was nice to have something to pass the time. 

*

There was an armchair next to the fireplace in the Common Room that was nice and comfortable. It felt like it molded to his body when he sat down, there was a little table that he could prop his feet on if he wanted, and the chair was low enough to the ground that it was easy to reach into his bag for a book or more parchment if he needed it. 

"Hey Si," James said, and Sirius tried not to sigh. He'd been having a good time for once, and now James wanted him to go out and socialize as if anyone in the group actually wanted to be around him. James's persistence probably meant that-- for some unknowable reason-- he missed Sirius, but it was doubtful that Remus and Peter felt the same after what he'd done. "We're going to the kitchens for a bit, you want to come?" 

"No thanks," Sirius said, trying desperately to hold onto the contentment he'd had for a moment there. 

He kept his eyes trained on the textbook in front of him, so he didn't see anything happen, but a moment later he heard Peter mutter, "C'mon James, he's not interested, just let it go." 

"Go on, I'll catch up." 

"James-" Remus cut off, then sighed. "Fine." Then, in an undertone, "He doesn't want to hang out with us, you're wasting your time." 

For half a second, Sirius thought about chiming in to say that Remus was right and maybe they should just buggering leave him alone, but that wouldn't really help the distance he'd managed to get. 

James picked up Sirius's feet so he could sit on the table, then set Sirius's feet back down on his lap. "Despite what you might think," he said in a low tone so that nobody else could hear him, "I do miss you. Moony and Wormtail do too. We get why you've missed the past couple moons, and that's probably for the best so Moony can get back to normal, but you're coming to the one on Thursday, right?" 

"Why the hell would I?" Sirius asked blandly. 

"We need you there." 

Sirius snorted. 

"It's not the same without you, love." 

"Will you stop with that already?" Sirius said, knocking his head back against the headrest. "I fucked up and I know it. You don't have to keep pushing it." 

"Do you really think any of us are still mad about that?" James asked, pressing his thumb into the arch of Sirius's foot. He started massaging one of his feet, and for a moment Sirius forgot himself in how good it felt. 

"Merlin," he groaned. It had been a while since he'd touched anyone more than accidentally bumping into them, and he'd forgotten how much it comforted him. He was weak. He should've pushed James away, or at the very least pulled his feet back and ignored him. 

"Peter was never mad, just scared. Remus was mad for all of five minutes, and me..." James made a face. "Well, I needed about two days, the first to be mad, and the second to remember how it all went down, y'know? You're family Si, come back." 

"See, it sounds nice when you say it like that," Sirius said conversationally, eyes still closed, "but in the real world my family hates me." 

"I hate it when you say that," James said quietly. 

"Say what, the truth?" 

"They're not your family anymore. Family is me and Mum and Dad, and Remus and Peter." 

"Yeah, well... good for you." 

James sighed, knowing that Sirius was saying that to make him shut it, not because he agreed with him or anything. 

*

After that, James flat out didn't let him be alone. He was stuck to Sirius's side, always dragging him around wherever he went. At first, Sirius was annoyed, trying to insult James enough that he'd let him go his own way, but James saw right through it. It didn't matter that normally he did everything Sirius said if he thought it would make him happy, this time he outright refused. 

Sirius wanted to hate him for it, but all that happened was he started feeling... better. He didn't dread every single morning and every single class and every single time he had to force himself to eat. He didn't really feel good, but he stopped feeling horrible all the time. 

It made for a nice change. 

*

James had taken to aggressively cuddling Sirius until he finally got comfortable enough to get to sleep, and that easily turned into them falling asleep together. Sirius got used to the extra weight and the way his mattress tilted to adjust for the extra weight. 

The arrangement made it so easy to roll over and kiss him one night when Peter and Remus were already in bed with the curtains drawn. 

"Si..." 

Sirius didn't want to hear him say that it was a bad idea, so he kissed him again, putting his hand on the back of James's head to hold him close. For a beautiful moment, James kissed him back. Then he pulled back, the air between them shared in hot puffs. "You okay?" he asked quietly. 

Stung, Sirius retreated into his own space a little. "'m fine." 

"Hey," James whispered, reaching out and pulling him back in. "Do it again in the morning, and I'll believe it's not because you're lonely and I'm convenient." 

*

They woke up, and James's heart sank when Sirius rolled off the opposite side of the bed, rubbing at his eyes. Sirius went to the loo, brushed his teeth, and got dressed, all with his eyes barely open and yawning periodically. He collapsed back on the bed and hugged James's pillow as he got ready.

"C'mon, Si, we gotta go get breakfast." James expected that this was going to be a morning where he had to manhandle Sirius the first half hour, but instead Sirius turned over and stumbled to his feet. 

"I hate this," he mumbled, which was a welcome change from when he used to say 'I hate you' to James. 

"I know, I'm sorry." 

"Umph." Sirius swooped in and gave him a kiss, then shuffled to the door. 

James blinked, then grinned, following after him. This didn't fix everything, and Sirius still wasn't back to his old self, but it was heartening to know that things were getting at least a little bit better. 

[morelikebaequo]

Versions of Cinderella Ranked

10. A Cinderella Story: Once Upon a Song (2011)- Full disclosure, I haven’t seen this one all the way through buuuuuuuut it is a ripoff of a ripoff so here we are 

9. R&H’s Cinderella 1965- Like. It’s fine, but it just makes me want to watch a better version of this movie. (this isn’t a gif of it but the Broadway version makes me think of this version. No, I do not particularly like the Broadway version of R&H’s Cinderella and this is my way of shoehorning that in)

8. Disney’s Cinderella (1950)- There are good things about this movie! But you have to admit, it feels a little long. Like, I’m pretty sure they spend as much time on the mice as they do on Cinderella. Look I like this version but I have to be in Exact Right Mood for it

7. Another Cinderella Story (2008)- As far as mid-2000s teen rom-coms go, this coulda been worse. It’s fun and I enjoy the dance sequences. But it still just makes me want to watch a better movie 

6. Roger’s and Hammerstein’s Cinderella (1957)

I mean. The only reason this one is as high as it is is because of Julie Andrews. Other than that. It’s Pretty Forgetful. (They didn’t have a gif for it so enjoy)

5. Disney’s Cinderella (2015)- Ok in my humble opinion THIS IS HOW YOU ADAPT YOUR SHIT DISNEY. This movie isn’t flawless by a long shot! But it’s fun, it fits a certain mood. They took what was good about their original version and worked with that. They fixed some of the issues with it without obsessing over it. THE DRESS! Richard Madden as the prince!! ITS CUTE. It is their best live-action remake to date (I am really hoping Little Mermaid and Mulan will be even better!) 

4. A Cinderella Story (2004)- I don’t have to convince y’all how good this movie is. Hillary Duff as Sam? Flawless. Regina King as the (2nd) best fairy godmother? P e r f e c t i o n. Sam and Carter’s friendship? We support. A typically kinda blind but overall GOOD prince, er quarterback? hell yeah. THAT WHOLE SCENE AT THE DINER, y’all know which one. God this version is so good

3. Ella Enchanted (2004) - Yes I KNOW it’s nothing like the book. That doesn’t take away from the fact that this is a GREAT adaption of Cinderella. A badass Ella who is Anne Freaking Hathaway! Adventure with some fun and magical friends! A cute Prince who Ella has an actual relationship with! A fun villain whose kind of charming, but so much so that we don’t root for them! THE HALL OF MIRRORS SCENE. Also, it has two of the best musical numbers in cinematic history (I do actually consider the “Somebody to Love” scene as the third-best scene in cinematic history)

2. Ever After (1998)- Historical Cinderella with a strong female lead who is Drew Barrymore? uM YES. I love almost everything about this movie. Danielle? The. Best. Prince Henry? A lovable dumbass. Leo Da Vinci as the fairy godmother? What an iconic move. Tbh the relationship Danielle and Rodmilla have is clearly what they were going for in 2015 version but they just didn’t know how to make it work. Also, Jacquline the good stepsister? We love. Her picking up Henry to save him?? UM YES. The ball and Danielle’s dress? BEYOND AMAZING. DANIELLE SAVING HERSELF AND PRINCE PRINCE AWKWARDLY BEING LIKE “oh...i came here to rescue you”. The revenge scene after Danielle and Henry are married? amazing. 

“We are supposed to live happily ever after?”

“Says who?

“Do you know? I don’t know” 

Wow I love this movie 

1. Rodger’s and Hammerstein’s Cinderella (1997)- Look I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. This is the best Cinderella. This is the perfect adaption of this fairytale. Brandy’s Ella is just lovely. She’s strong, but she’s scared and her fairy godmother says “You have to save yourself, I can’t do that for you”. Paolo Montalban’s Prince Christopher? He’s so cute! And, what I love about this version is that they meet before the ball and they have a c on n e c t i o n but they move on and then he’s like “wait I’ve seen you before” and the second he sees her when he finds her again there’s no dumb “could it really you?” Nah man he KNOWS his girl and they put the slipper on because it's cute. Also the supporting cast? Flawless. Bernadette Peters Stepmother? Just wow. The stepsisters? Funny but not like too miserable, you don’t Hate them, but you know they deserve to be locked out of that wedding. Whoopi Goldberg and Victor Garber as the King and Queen? Wow, this is an iconic couple and we know which one of them really rules this kingdom. Even Jason Alexander as Lionel is p good. Whitney Huston as the Fairy Godmother is the only thing that matters. She also handpicked Brandy to be Cinderella and Brandy said the only if Whitney played the Fairy Godmother. That story just fills me with so much joy. And the cherry on top is that they took this version and filled it in with other Rodgers and/or Hammerstein songs. Honestly, the reason I don’t like the Broadway version is that they could’ve adapted this version to the stage and they didn’t and it just pales in comparison man. This is The. Best. Cinderella. 

E V E R. 

[glassc0ffin]

Spreading

frankie has a haunted tattoo its pretty neat. another transcript fic

pairing: oc (frankie james)/jonathan sims

words: 2049

warnings: yearning

[CLICK]

FRANKIE JAMES:

Oh, I've missed that tape recorder. I still haven't got one, y'know.

ARCHIVIST:

There are some spares around somewhere, I could try and get one for you. I-If you wanted.

JAMES:

You'd do that? ...What if you get in trouble?

ARCHIVIST:

With what's going on around here, I doubt anyone would notice one missing tape recorder. But, I digress. What are you doing back here? I thought the voices had stopped.

JAMES:

Well… They did, after a while. Thanks for looking into that, by the way. I was a nervous wreck for a good while, there.

ARCHIVIST:

It was no problem. I'm glad you're doing at least a bit better.

[PAUSE]

You are doing better?

JAMES:

I mean, I thought I was. Up until –

ARCHIVIST:

Wait, I-I should –

JAMES:

Oh, yeah, go ahead.

ARCHIVIST:

Statement of Frankie James, radio DJ at Tranzishon Rock, London, regarding?

JAMES:

A tattoo I got recently.

ARCHIVIST:

Recorded direct from subject by Jonathan Sims, head archivist of The Magnus Institute, 5th of October, 2019. Statement begins.

[PAUSE]

A tattoo? Would you mind showing me?

JAMES:

I - Okay, it's a little… Complicated. A couple of days after I saw you the first time, I decided to treat myself, seeing as I felt like shit – Don't worry, I'll show you in a little bit, I just need to explain something first – and I texted my tattooist, Sarah, if she had any appointments soon. She said no, that she was booked up until Christmas, but that she had an apprentice in who could do something quick for me. And I thought, well, I trust Sarah, she wouldn't let some newbie who's never held a tattoo gun before into her studio. That, and I kind of wanted to be a learning experience. There's something about being a living canvas for someone that's a little appealing. 

ARCHIVIST:

[SIGHS] I'm not quite sure I relate, but go on.

JAMES:

She books me in for a session a couple of days later. I had my heart set on a space sleeve, with stars and planets and stuff, and a supernova exploding on my elbow. I had come into a little bit of money recently so instead of doing the responsible thing, like paying my rent, I wanted to spend a ridiculous amount of money on myself. I commissioned a friend to design the sleeve and went to Sarah's with it. 

ARCHIVIST:

It sounds beautiful.

JAMES:

[QUIETLY] I can think of something more beautiful.

ARCHIVIST:

Hmm?

JAMES:

I-Er, nothing, don't worry. [WHISPERED] Shit.

[PAUSE] So, yeah, the tattoo. The newbie, I learned his name was Jimmy, transferred it onto my arm and started work. Funnily enough, we got off on the same foot as you and I.

ARCHIVIST:

Really? How so?

JAMES:

Y'know how I was obsessing over your tape recorder because of how cute and vintage it is? He had an antique tattoo gun he was using on me, paddle-operated and everything, it was really cool! He was as enthusiastic about it as I was, he said that he got it from a fancy vintage place. I can't remember what it was called but he said the bloke running it was called...Salesa? I think? 

ARCHIVIST:

...I see.

JAMES:

Anyway, it hurt a lot more than I was expecting. I just put it down to the gun being old and that was just what people used to have to deal with. I remember thinking I hope that gun's passed some safety checks. I mean, it wasn't rusty or anything, but I didn't want it to just fall apart while it was still stabbing me and fuck up my tattoo. Wait, am I allowed to swear?

ARCHIVIST:

I-It's not against regulations, as such. I'm not going to tell you off, anyway.

JAMES:

Aw, thank you. I'm not really a bleeder when I get tattoos, I have enough now to know what to expect, but with this one, i-it was like I had anemia or something. Every half hour we had to stop so I could eat something or I'd feel like passing out. Eventually, after 3 hours, I hit my limit. I was getting light headed and kind of annoyed, so I told Jimmy I'd be back in a week or so to finish it off. It was only from my elbow and down to my wrist, he hadn't even started on my upper arm yet. 

After that, I went straight back home - I had moved back there since the voices had stopped by then, don't know why they did but I'm thankful anyway - and collapsed onto my bed clutching my arm. It was already hot and swollen, trying to heal already. There was some cling film put over it and bandages. I soaked right through them overnight and onto my bedsheets. The next morning I could barely extend my arm. It was twice the size of the other and just oozing yucky stuff. It probably wasn't the best idea for an open wound, but like everyone does when they have an open wound, I stuck it under the cold tap. It was only then, in the harsh light of my bathroom, that I saw my tattoo properly that morning. 

There was a planet in the blackness of inked space that wasn't there before. I'm sure of it. It's not even in the original design. It was ringed, like Saturn. I even tried rubbing it off my skin but that just made it bleed more. It was way too early in the morning for me to deal with that shit, so I just wrapped it in some new bandages and went out to get food. It was aching the whole time I was out, and when I rolled up my jacket sleeves I saw I had leaked through the bandage again, and through my shirt.

It hurt. It hurt so much. More than any of my other tattoos healing. But again, I just thought it was that old tattoo gun, and because I hadn't protested when Jimmy brought it out, it was my own fault. My own stupid fault that I'd probably have to get my arm amputated because I caught fucking gangrene off an antique tattoo gun. 

I just resigned myself to cleaning it again when I got home. In fact, I ran a bath. And as I took my shirt off I looked in the mirror, and the tattoo had gotten bigger. I swear. We had stopped at the elbow, I promise, but it was at least an inch higher than that before, all the way around my arm. In fact, the new area was sore to touch, as if it had just been tattooed on, where the area at my wrist had already started to scab.

And as another day passed, the tattoo grew, and I cleaned it. And another day. And another. And now I'm here. Again.

ARCHIVIST:

Statement ends. Will you show me? The tattoo I mean?

JAMES:

Ah, sure. [CLOTHES RUSTLING] There. Careful, that part only appeared this morning.

ARCHIVIST:

[GASPS] I-I see what you mean… Frankie, I-I don't think you - uh - needed to take your whole shirt off...Wait a minute.

JAMES:

What? What is it?

ARCHIVIST:

It's on your back as well, here…

JAMES:

[SHARP BREATH INTAKE]

ARCHIVIST:

Sorry! I didn't mean to poke you.

JAMES:

No - you didn't hurt me, it's just - your hands are so cold! [LAUGHS, NERVOUS]

ARCHIVIST:

Jesus...I-It's moving!

JAMES:

WHAT?

ARCHIVIST:

The - That planet is spinning! The stars, they're twinkling as well! 

JAMES:

FUCK, dude, WHAT?

ARCHIVIST:

Frankie, you can't go home like this. Your skin is raw, I don't know how you're dealing with this…

JAMES:

I'm not. Painkillers, mostly. I…try not to think about it. 

ARCHIVIST:

We have some medics here who can help you, we can keep an eye on you, on that tattoo. And track down the man who sold your friend that gun.

JAMES:

I, er, need some stuff from my flat.

ARCHIVIST:

[SOFTLY] If you'd like, I can come with you to help. I doubt you'd be able to lift much with your arm in that state. 

JAMES:

Thank you… Why are you doing this?

ARCHIVIST:

What do you mean?

JAMES:

Well, don't you have assistants and stuff to deal with this crap? You don't do this with every person who gives a statement, right?

ARCHIVIST:

You're right. I don't. [PAUSES] You're different.

JAMES:

I-I am?

ARCHIVIST:

Yes...You're the first person I've ever met who is evidence of their statement, living, breathing, evidence that you weren't lying. And if I'm being honest, it's fascinating. 

JAMES:

[NERVOUS LAUGHTER] Thanks, I think… Can I put my shirt back on now? 

ARCHIVIST:

Oh, yes, o-of course. I can turn around if you want.

JAMES:

What's the point? You've just seen my boobs, seeing them covered isn't really going to make a difference.

ARCHIVIST:

[UNDER HIS BREATH] Good lord. [COUGHS] Yes, quite. Oh, er, recording ends.

[CLICK]

[CLICK]

ARCHIVIST:

Are you feeling any better today?

JAMES:

Not really. Still hurts. Thanks for asking, though.

ARCHIVIST:

I’ll see about getting you some painkillers. Would you mind showing me how far it’s progressed? I need to get it recorded.

JAMES:

Yeah, just… Gimme a second. It’s a little hard to move my arm now.

ARCHIVIST:

I can help. I-If you want.

JAMES:

...Yeah. Yeah, okay. [CLOTHES RUSTLING] Ow!

ARCHIVIST:

Sorry! Sorry. Was that part new?

JAMES:

I think so. It’s all a bit sore.

ARCHIVIST:

Yes, I can see. Your skin is red around the edges of the thing. Hold on, let me put some gloves on. [STRETCHY ELASTIC NOISES]

JAMES:

So you want me to bend over and cough, doc?

ARCHIVIST:

[SNORTS] Stop, I need to be delicate. I can’t do that if you’re giving me the giggles. Oh, let me - [COUGHS] Supplement of Statement #421904, recorded on the 6th of October, 2019, examining the tattoo of Frankie James, given to him from a gun sold by Mikaele Salesa. Statement begins.

JAMES:

Your hands are still deathly cold.

ARCHIVIST:

Sorry about that. Tattoo originally started at the wrist of the subject, and ended at the elbow. Today, approximately one week after the initial application, it has extended over the subjects hand, up his arm, and is currently spilling onto his chest and back. The tattoo is of a galaxy, with a number of planets and stars dotted about. On the subject’s elbow is a supernova exploding.

JAMES:

That part hurt the most.

ARCHIVIST:

I can imagine. Originally, the tattoo only had four planets and six stars, all located on the forearm, but as of today, the number has increased to eight planets and [COUNTING UNDER HIS BREATH] fifteen stars. It also appears to...move...at times, the stars seem to twinkle, and the planets spin on their axis. [BREATHES OUT] Very unusual.

JAMES:

That’s an understatement.

ARCHIVIST:

I’m just going to take some photos, if that’s alright?

JAMES:

Yeah, just get my good side.

ARCHIVIST:

[LAUGHS] You don’t have a bad side. [PAUSE] [CAMERA SHUTTERS 5 TIMES] There. That should be all I need for now. You can pop your shirt back on.

JAMES:

Can I just leave it off? It really hurts and having to peel it off again later to clean it will just hurt even more.

ARCHIVIST:

A-Alright. I’ll see you in a bit, Frankie.

JAMES:

Jon, wait.

ARCHIVIST:

Hmm? What’s wrong?

JAMES:

Nothing, I just… Thanks for helping me bring some stuff over here. You didn’t have to do that.

ARCHIVIST:

I wanted to help. Frankie, when you came in, you looked terrified. I was...very worried for you.

JAMES:

[NERVOUS LAUGHTER] Shit, I thought I was hiding it better. Okay, but, surely everyone that comes in to give a statement is going to be bricking it?

ARCHIVIST:

Well, like I said before, you’re fascinating. [PAUSE] It! It’s fascinating, your tattoo, it’s -

JAMES:

[SNORTS]

ARCHIVIST:

Not to say that you’re not fascinating, I-I- [SIGHS] I should leave, before I make an even bigger fool of myself.

JAMES:

Bye, Jon. You’re not too bad, yourself.

ARCHIVIST:

R-Right. Thanks. Goodbye.

JAMES:

Jon, wait! [PAUSE] And there he goes. I guess I’ll end this myself, then. Shit, I hope I don’t break it somehow. Erm, statement ends?

[bubblesthemonsterartist]

Slide (lemon)

Professional Cuddler AU Masterlist

One would think that Dr. Shirayuki Lyon has been blessed with an interesting life. Never a dull, mundane moment to be had. If you were to believe the tabloids, at least. 

When she was eighteen, she fled her country, befriended the Prince of the neighboring state, and immediately enrolled in Royal Medical School. There, she had the dubious honor of becoming the obsession of paparazzi and journalists and… eccentric nobility alike. Some just wanted her picture through the heavy shade of trees, leaning in close to their beloved Prince. Something to put on a glossy front page. Most, however, were hungry to tear her apart.

Much to their chagrin, she did not give them much fodder. First by passing all her marks, top of the class. Then by becoming the second youngest resident Lilias Research Hospital had ever seen. She was the primary researcher on the Olin Maris Project, pleading her case to parliament, knights circles, to Kings, and meeting success in every direction.

But what no one seems to know, or rather, what no one seems to care about other, is that she also has chronic insomnia exacerbated by a panic disorder. According to the hospital psychiatry department.

Strange how that particular detail never made it into the news.

Not that she was complaining. It’s not that much of a surprise, though. It used to just be generalized anxiety… once, when she could blame her GPA. Or her MCAT. Likely her residency, too. But that was in the past. She has a job now. A career. Respect in her field and esteem among her peers. She should be falling into her bed, curling into that memory foam mattress Yuzuri insisted she buy and luxuriating in a well-deserved rest, but-

Things have changed.

These days, it’s not rote memorization or endless case studies or even the errant photographer outside her window that has her startling awake, heart pounding, but crushed metal and the splatter of water echoing off of empty walls. Each night, with heavy eyes and a heavier heart, she slides between her sheets and hopes that it will be better. And a not so small part of her begrudges her in her younger days, smiling away classmates concerns by proclaiming, I’ll sleep when I have my MD.

What an arrogant child she had been.

But things were… getting better. Slowly. Surely. 

The cameramen and journalists were gone now, for one, off to cover more exciting things than a doctor in mourning. And for every shift she arrived at, vision blurred and eyes gritty, there was a fresh cup of coffee being pushed into her hands by a smiling face, Yuzuri already cheerfully detailing What Kazaha had done this time as Shirayuki slowly reacquainted herself with the world of the living. For every hint of migraine threatening to hole her up in a dark room for just a moment of peace, there was Suzu, flapping some new article in her face, Can you believe the National Endowment funded this tripe? There was Shidan, eyes sliding right past her as he reassigned her to pediatrics when the ER became too much. Ryuu, who would tug on her sleeve as she passed by, claiming he needed an extra set of eyes in the lab. And Garrack, dragging her to a nearby bar to “catch up” whenever she was in town, only to ply her with a shot of gin and a stern reminder to eat.

She was blessed, really, with so much kindness. So many helping hands and warm smiles and gentle encouragement that made each passing day since the accident that much easier. It was therefore that much more frustrating that even with all this support, it still wasn’t enough to get her through the night.

This, however, sometimes was.

Sleep lifts from her sweetly on an inhale, and she wakes as content and warm as her childhood days, buried beneath one of her grandmothers winter quilts in the depths of winter. Everything is hazy, but in a good way. Weighted down into her mattress, there’s a familiar sort of heat at her back, one that has become nearly second nature in the last few months, even more so when mixed with the smell and sound of home.

Home…

Her eyelashes flutter, taking in the shadows of her dresser, her closet door, the lamp on her nightstand, and- that’s right. This isn’t the studio. She invited Obi over to her place. To spend the night. To sleep, even, with all the rules of the Cuddle Clinic and none of the time restraints.

Breath pours out from her, body curling deeper into his hold and seeking every inch of that heat. With just a little wiggle, the low of his belly is flush against her, knees stacked on top of the other like the right pieces to a puzzle, and his hips fitted snugly against her ass.

Behind her, Obi grunts, disturbed, his arms tightening and pulling her closer still. It’s… nice. Pleasant enough to let her eyes fall closed, to let her barely there wakefulness unravel - there’s no need to be awake anyhow, but-

There’s pressure. A wanting sort of yawn between her legs. Desire, warm and sleep damp, but- that’s not unique. The heat coiled deep in her belly is safe and… manageable. It’s always an ever present burn, simmering on low during their sessions and this time is no different. Obi’s doing his job - a rather admirable one if she says so herself - and it’s only natural that her body react. It’s been so long, after all, and she’s so rarely touched these days-

Breath fans out across her neck, palms flexing against her with a sleepy groan, and Shirayuki’s brain fizzles out, overridden by the way her body is suddenly aware.

O- oh.

At her breast one broad hand, tipped with calluses and worked hard, cradles her, the palm of his other branding the flare of her hip, thumb sweeping the jut of her hip bone and-

Shirayuki inhales sharply, thighs clenching against the sudden rush of heat. Catching a whimper between her teeth, she carefully brushes her fingers across the fine bones of his, past the knob of his wrist and the flex of his forearm, dipping towards her own body and confirming what she already suspected. And maybe, in some shameful, hidden place in her heart, wished for.

Her nightshirt has ridden up, all the way to her armpits. She’s bare skin all the way from toes to shoulders and snug against his clothed crotch and torso. The arm circling her stretches her shirt as far as it can go, to the point that the scratch of flannel blanket is more present against her skin than the touch of cotton.

Shirayuki bites her lips, struck breathless, and God, why did she think scheduling overnight service was a good thing? She’s so wet, she can feel it against her thighs and when she remembers to inhale, the skin of his inner forearm so soft again her exposed ribcage, and she- she squirms, involuntary-

Head thudding back to rest against his collarbone, Shirayuki takes a deep breath- tries to steady it out- and this was- this was fine. She was fine. Obi grunts again, the hand cradling her hip shifting her back, other arm banding tighter around her, and oh- oh-

Right against her inner thigh, she feels it. Through well worn fabric, the swollen length of him, half-hard, rests just so against her inner thigh.

And she’s awake now, fully, panting and flushed, the heat between her legs nearly unbearable. All it would take is a shift in angle, a slight parting of her legs, and she could- she could feel him completely, grind herself against his cock and-

And see what he was like when he was ready.

Shirayuki shakes herself, rubbing her thighs together to ease some of the pressure. No, no, this was fine. Manageable and... fine.

Obi makes a sound too like a whimper for comfort, mouth relaxed in sleep resting against her skin in a way that makes her shiver. Stubble drags along the line of her jaw, his lips just barely touching the shell of her ear, and- she’s only human. She moans, the sound slipping from her more like a whine, arching into his palm and it moves, just slightly, his thumb dragging around an already peaked nipple, forefinger coming around to pinch and roll-

Her low back arches like a cats, ass pressing back so she can feel the growing length of him against slip against her.

“Obi,” she gasps.

All at once, he breathes in, starting out long and pleasant before turning sharp, and it’s not fair how quickly he wakes up, the safe relaxed strength of his body going rigid.

“Miss,” he starts, voice rough with sleep, and she wants to tell him more, that she wants to hear him say more against her skin, but he’s pulling his hands away, pulling his body away.

Her hands latch around his wrists, holding him in place, and she rolls her head along his shoulder, arching her neck up to see his face.

“Don’t stop,” she breathes, catching just the shape of his eye as it widens and she lets go of the hand at her breast to reach up and urge his head down. His hair is so soft. “Please. Don’t stop.”

“Ha-” is the only answer she gets before his mouth is on hers, soft and giving and wet as he groans against her mouth. Lips parting to his urging, she opens to him, reaching up with her other hand to sink all her fingers into the bristle of his hair and he slides his tongue against hers, so good it must be sin. Her ankle hooks around his calf, and he tastes like sleep, but- ah, ahh-

The palm at her hip scratches up her stomach, taking her other breast fully in hand and he rolls both her nipples between his fingers.

Shirayuki cries out, body surging up into his hands, and Obi takes the advantage, tilting his head to press his kisses deeper, harder, dirtier, and she grinds back against him, each little spark of pleasure muffled by his lips and tongue, ah, ahh, Ahhh-

For as often as she’s imagined this, for as gentle as he is with her in their sessions, it still comes as a surprise with the way his hold doesn’t bruise, how he can be filled with so much restrained strength even as he takes her in his palms and squeezes.

The sessions-

“Wait,” she pulls back, panting against his lips, toes curling when he whines with want into her mouth. “Wait, Ah-” Her eyelashes flutter, swallowing hard when he pinches, and he does- stop, that is, parted lips resting against hers and he just… breathes into her mouth. “Aren’t you still working?”

“I’m off the clock,” he murmurs, voice raspy like gravel, tongue flicking on her lower lip.

“Oh,” she gasps, fingers fisting in his hair. “Okay.”

Obi hisses, teeth bared against her lips, but he rears back, cock twitching impatiently against her backside.

“Rules?” he grits.

It takes her a moment, maybe even two, but she gains enough clarity to stare at him in disbelief.

“You haven’t gone too far yet.” She bites at his lower lip, goading him to come back to her. “I’ll let you know if you do.”

That’s all he seems to need. Groaning, he takes her mouth again, rolling her beneath him and his hands are everywhere. His palms catch against her ribs, against her thighs, grasping beneath her knees and lifting them sharply up to coil around his waist.

“How are you so damn soft?” he complains breathlessly against her neck, the hard line of his cock flush against her sex as his lips drag across her pulse, teeth nipping at the line of her jaw.

“Salt baths,” she manages, mindlessly running her hands over his shoulders, over his neck, rolling her hips up-

He pulls his away, back shaking, and noses her nightshirt towards her chin. “Is that so?” he murmurs against skin, biting the valley between her breasts.

“Mm.” She can barely see, let alone form words, so it’s something of a miracle that she opens her mouth and says, “It’s very nice. You should try- Ah!”

Obi’s mouth is… very nice. And distracting. Every time he uses it, he finds a better application, a better way to steer her away from her thoughts, and this time is no different. It’s opening, taking her whole nipple inside and sucking, wetly laving at her nipple and nibbling at its peak.

Writhing beneath him, straining against his hands, part of her considers how strange it is that she thought she would feel guilt if she ever… had a chance at being touched like this again. Stranger still how she feels anything but.

His fingers tease across her legs, flirting with the crease of her thighs. And when his knuckles brush against her damp curls, guilt is the last thing on her mind.

“Please, please, please-” she chants, nearly sobbing, grabbing hold of the pillow above her head for dear life.

Humming against her skin, he trades one breast for another, knuckles slipping through her folds, testing-

“Fuck,” he hisses, one finger extended to dip into her entrance. “Fuck, you’re so wet.”

Whining, Shirayuki bucks her hips, exchanging her grip on the pillow for her own hair. “Then do something about-”

He does. One finger slips deep inside her, crooking just right, and her vision goes white.

“Obi!” Her hands are scrambling now, holding him to her as his mouth slides down the curve of her breasts, licking at the line of her ribs, and he pumps his hand, slow and steady, a second finger sliding in just as easy as the first.

“I got-” She loses track of what she’s got, knees falling to the side when his thumb brushes her clit. Obi hums, interested, pressing a kiss to the dip of her solar plexus.

Hand slamming against the top of her nightstand, it wildly slaps against the surface, knocking over books and her phone until she finds the handle of the drawer and flings it open. Mindlessly reaching inside, she grabs hold of the sharp edges of a paperboard and throws it in Obi’s direction.

It bounces harmlessly off of his arm and Obi lifts his head, grunting a question.

“That’s-” She gestures towards it, she thinks, staring sightlessly at her ceiling. “That’s for you.”

His fingers still in her all the way to the last knuckle, Obi lays his weight on her and takes it in his free hand. “Why, Miss,” he purrs, thumb brushing her clit in reward and she- she whimpers.

“Hurry,” she pants, the flat of her feet against his ribs, coaxing him up.

The box returns to the bed with a dull rattle. “In a minute,” he grins, dropping his mouth back to her belly.

She doesn’t have a minute. She doesn’t even have a second, not with the way she aches. Not with the way each slow pump of his hand makes it worse and not better.

He exhales, sharp and through his nose, the cool air fanning right above the hair of her sex, and that’s all the warning she gets before his mouth his on her, lips circling her clit while his fingers stab sharp and deep.

She screams.

So many things fall from her tongue after that, so many sweet and terrifying and lovely things, but she can’t remember any of them, so completely lost in the way his tongue drags, his fingers curl, his mouth sucks-

It’s really no wonder that she comes apart as quickly as she does, so completely and unapologetically.

Her lungs are burning when she finds herself again, her chest heaving, and Obi is still there, tucked between her legs and kissing her thighs, fingers deep inside her.

“Obi.” She wriggles against his hand, gasping at the sudden jolt of pleasure, and she’s so greedy. “Please. The- you have to- condom-”

Two gold eyes peek up at her, sly and dark, his mouth still pressed against skin. “Condom?” he murmurs, and any other time she would be annoyed at the smug curl of his lips, but-

This was an emergency.

Shirayuki nods rapidly, hands already back in his hair and dragging her to him. “Yes. That.”

His mouth swallows up anything else that he may have said, tasting a little bitter and a little smokey and it makes her strain against him, hopelessly seeking out some bare part of him that can touch her.

Obi takes her by the hips, dragging her down and aligning her sex with his. He’s growling with he pulls back, when he grasps at the mess of blankets for the box and nothing happens when he shakes it.

“Wait,” he pauses, tearing his attention from her long enough to squint at it. “Is this a new box?”

“Why are you still talking?” she whines, grinding her sex against the line of his erection.

A strangled groan leaves him, the sound of paperboard tearing open and plastic tearing along the perforated edge nearly drowned out. Her hands are already at the stretchy waistband of his pajamas when he tears the packaging open with his teeth, pushing them down just far enough that his cock springs free.

Oh.

Oh my.

She’s not given nearly enough time to enjoy the view. His fingers shake when he wraps them around himself, rolling the condom down the length of him, and her hand joins his, pushing it down faster.

He hisses and laughs in equal measure, mouth opening, likely to tease, but she fists her fingers in his shirt with her other hand, pulling him down and-

Ah!

God, it’s been so long, and she was expecting some difficulty, some pain from not being used for such a length of time, but the soft head of his dick parts her lips, disappearing inside her slowly, easily. He fills her up, stuffing her full, and she opens to him just as effortlessly, stretching around the girth of him and wholly thankful for it. Two fingers were not nearly enough.

She can’t breathe fast enough, hands somehow beneath his shirt, petting down the soft skin of his back. “Obi... Oh god, yes...”

Groaning against her neck, his fingers clench on the swell of her hip, pressing her down into the mattress as he slides in all the way and, oh, this is why Yuzuri recommended the memory foam-

When his hips stop, flush to hers, his chest is heaving, whole body trembling. “Miss,” he pants into her hair. “Miss-”

Her ankles hook around his back, hips bucking against his. “Shirayuki,” she whines, nails dragging down his back. “Say my name, Obi.”

“Haa, yes,” he moans like he’s dying, drawing out. “Yes, Shirayuki-”

His pace is fast, deep, leaving her body only by half before surging back forward, filling her up and driving her into the mattress. He keeps one hand at the nape of her neck and the small of her back, pressing her to him as he sinks into her again and again, each thrust that hits her right there drawing out a cry that she muffles against the fabric of his shirt.

“Shirayuki,” he moans over and over like he is making up for lost time, tilting her head back to whimper it again into her mouth. His hands slide up her thighs, lifting her into his thrusts and she wraps her arms around his head and neck, keening against his lips, taking him in every way that she can.

Her body is hot, burning, and her toes sneak beneath the stretch of his waistband, pushing it down so her toes can curl against the hard muscles of his ass, feeling their flex as he pushes deeper, harder-

His pace stutters, no longer smooth but frantic, and he’s still swallowing every one of her breaths and cries when his hand slides up her thigh so his thumb can brush where they join-

She comes so hard tears gather at the corner of her eyes, riding him out as he rides her, as his hips slap desperately against hers and he groans out a high keening noise. With one last surge that nearly drives her up the bed, he comes to a stop. Shivering against her skin, his breath catches and then shakes out of him, and his hips jerk a few times more, trying to press himself deeper before he just… melts, all at once, face landing on the pillow next to her.

“Ha,” he swallows hard, gasping when his hands flexing against her skin one more time. “Haa, I didn’t-”

Shirayuki’s mouth finds his neck, lips catching the rapid rhythm of his heart and holding it beneath her tongue and teeth.

Sighing, the tension pours out of him again, hips squirming against hers. “Ah, ah, stop,” he laughs, breathless. “You’re going to get me started again.”

With a pleased grin, she does, looking up at him beneath the fan of her lashes when he pulls back just far enough to look her in the eyes. When his forehead touches hers, there’s a question there. One that she answers with a smile.

Shirayuki tugs him back down to her, sliding her lips against his, tender and soft, and whatever tension was left in them pour out of them both all at once. Legs sliding down his side, she lets them collapse onto the bed with a whimper and he sighs, pulling his body from hers.

Sitting back on his heels, Obi hisses, just a little, the wet slap of latex echoing somewhere in the dark, and he just… sits there. On his knees. With a mussed head of hair, a used condom in hand, and an adorable look of bufflement on his face as he looks helplessly around the room.

“Next to the nightstand.” Her arm flails absently. She has no energy to do more than that.

Bracing one arm against the mattress, he leans out, neck arching as he seeks out the bin. The second after she hears a dull thud, he collapses onto the bed next to her, drawing him to her.

“Was that okay?” he whispers into her hair, petting back the sticky strands of hair that cling to her face.

Her hands snake under his shirt again, and it’s cool and damp like their skin. “More than.”

[idreamofplaid]

The Road Not Taken

Square Filled: Hospital AU for @spnaubingo

Characters: Sam; Dean; Meg; Jessica mentioned

Rating: Teen

Summary: Sam held onto his dream of being a doctor at a cost.

Word Count: 668

Created for @spnaubingo

Sam had thought about the decision he’d made all those years ago many times. He thought about Dean even more than that. He could never get the look on his brother’s face out of his mind when he’d refused to leave Stanford and go home when their father got sick. Why would he leave his life, his girlfriend, and his dream of being a doctor behind for a man who’d kicked him out of the house?

The Family Business was not the place for him. His father had used the term so much he’d given the name to his garage, but being a mechanic was not in Sam’s plans. Instead he’d spent long hours in med school, married Jessica, and now they were talking about having a baby. None of that kept him from missing his brother or thinking about him every day.

It was a busy night in the ER. Sam had chosen emergency medicine because he liked saving lives, and he had the temperament to handle any kind of crisis situation. The part he still couldn’t accept was not being able to save everyone. He was determined the kid on the table with the gunshot wound was not going to be one of them. The boy couldn’t be more than seventeen. What kind of trouble had he gotten himself into?

Sam got his patient stabilized then sent him to the surgeons to do the rest. He rubbed the bridge of his nose. The kids were always the toughest. He didn’t have long to collect himself before Meg Masters, the best nurse on staff in his mind, came looking for him. “Dr. Winchester, another trauma case just came in.”

Emotions in check, Sam asked for the details of the case. “White male. Early thirties. Appears to be an animal attack. Multiple deep lacerations. He’s in danger of bleeding out.”

Sam had seen enough blood and pain for anyone’s lifetime, but he wasn’t prepared for what he saw when he pulled back the curtain. It was Dean, his clothes in tatters and unconscious from blood loss. Sam began to issue orders. “Cut off his clothes. Start a transfusion. O negative.” Nurse Masters gave him a look. She’d keep his secret, but he had to be careful. He couldn’t let anything else like that slip, or he’d be taken off the case.

It took hundreds of stitches to sew Dean up. Sam had ordered some pretty heavy duty pain meds for him. It wasn’t going to be pleasant when he woke up, but Sam knew one thing; he was going to be there when he did. He sat by his brother’s bedside all night, memories of when they were kids playing through his mind.

Around 5 AM, Dean’s eyes blinked open. His voice was weak. “Sammy, I found you.”

Sam stood and leaned over the railing at the side of the bed. He couldn’t help but smile at Dean while he shook his head. “You didn’t have to do it like this.”

“Just wanted to test out your doctor skills.” Leave it to Dean to act like there hadn’t been a huge family blow up and to use humor to do it.

“What happened to you, Dean? You were almost dead when they brought you in here.”

“Wolf, I think. Didn’t really get a good look at it. Came at me from behind.” Dean tried to move, winced, and thought better of it.

“Wolves are pretty rare around here.” Sam was doing his usual. Focusing on the knowledge he had stored in his head to deal with what he was feeling.

Dean’s words were a little slow from the pain meds, but he was determined to talk. “Look, Sam, whatever beef you have with Dad that isn’t us. I miss my brother.”

Sam nodded. He thought about how he’d worshipped Dean growing up and all the years that had passed. “Yeah. Me too.”

A few seconds of silence passed. Then Dean cemented the reunion. “Thanks for saving me, Doc.”

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