#and kanji accepts that in himself where Yosuke can’t I don’t think

[fellhellion]

apologies for yosukeposting and especially incoherently but slowboiling in my brain whatever the hell was going on w him in kanji’s dungeon. guy who slingshots between some kinda fraught observation that this is so much worse for kanji because it’s happening in front of an audience (over like. freaking out about it), furiously asserting that he’s heterosexual, insinuating danger but then also being the one who volunteers to take kanji home afterwards.

It’s sooooooooooooooo.

[klvbxlove]

lunch (yosuke x introverted! gn! reader)

a/n: damn, i’m really out here with ANOTHER yosuke fic, aren’t i? not that i hate it, i have some fun writing for him! but i still can’t get over that one anon calling me a “subconscious yosuke kin” (to whoever sent me that, thanks LMAO). now, a bit off topic, i really wanna try to write for the investigation team girls as well, but i’m having a bit difficulty. so please note that it’s not like i hate the girls (if anything, they’re cool! i especially love naoto. i may or may not have a crush on her). it might take awhile for me to put out another fanfic for one of them that i actually like. 

reader type: gender neutral

reader specification(s): reader is an introvert (**)

genre(s): fluff

trigger warning(s): none

summary: yosuke noticed that you haven’t made the effort to make friends, let alone talk to at least one person, since the day you transferred to his class. he decided he would change that and invite you to lunch.

word count: 1.6k words

(**) i know i could’ve written this in the a/n above, but i felt like i had to point it this right BEFORE the drabble starts. for some people, the reader might not sound like an introvert. i understand. however, being an introvert myself, i did base the reader a little bit off of me and how i act around new people talking to me. 

♡ ♡ ♡ (ꈍᴗꈍ)ε｀*) ♡ ♡ ♡

key:

(l/n) = last name

♡ ♡ ♡ (ꈍᴗꈍ)ε｀*) ♡ ♡ ♡

   Yosuke knew that sometimes it would be considered rude (and creepy) to stare at a person for an extended period. 

   But was that enough to stop him from staring at you, though? No.

   Whenever he got a chance during class, Yosuke would gaze his brown eyes upon you. Ninety-nine percent of the time, you would be sitting alone at your desk and not paying attention to anyone around you. And either you would be reading a book or going on your phone. You were always so focused, as well. Yosuke swore the whole class could be extremely high on drugs, and you would pay no mind to it whatsoever. 

   It had only been a few days since you had transferred to his class, but as far as he knew, you still had not made any friends. Although, it did look like you did not care about it. He had never seen you trying to talk to one person in class before, either. 

   Yosuke knew himself as a bit of an extravert who has no problem making friends most of the time. So if anything, he expected himself to have gone up to you and at least introduced himself. But no, instead, all he has been doing was staring at you. Yosuke was conflicted on whether to talk to you or leave you alone. For all he knew, you probably did not like socializing with anyone. 

   At the moment you looked up to make eye contact, Yosuke immediately turned around in his seat. Oh God, he could only hope he did not look awkward or creepy doing that. The last thing he wanted was for a new classmate to have a negative impression on him. 

   Okay, he thought to himself. Maybe I can talk to the new student during lunch later. Maybe I could even invite them to eat with me! Well, unless they don’t want to. I mean, I hope they accept my offer.

-

   Holy crap, I did it! Yosuke felt like he was going stiff for the billionth time. He was currently sitting next to you on the rooftop after you had (surprisingly) accepted his invitation. Although, there was a bit of awkwardness in the air during this time. Yosuke felt too awkward to start eating as he could not help but steal a few more glances at you. Meanwhile, you were eating your lunch in silence while you looked off in the distance. 

   You gotta say at least one thing to (L/N), you know.

   “So, um, what do you think about Yasogami High so far? Is it alright?” Well, it was a bit of an unusual question, but Yosuke figured that he would start with that. “Or, what about Inaba?” 

   You hummed, thinking of how to answer as you chewed your food. “It’s alright. I mean, I haven’t gotten the chance to explore Inaba yet after moving in, so I can’t say how I feel about it so far.”

   Yosuke nodded in understanding. As much as he enjoyed living in Inaba, it was not comparable to big cities in Japan like Tokyo and Osaka. 

   And now that he thought about it, today was also the first time he got to hear your voice again. The last time Yosuke heard you talk was when you had to introduce yourself in front of your new classmates. Since then, you remained quiet amongst the class. 

   But then again, it already sent strange beatings to his heart for no reason. 

   “Is there a reason why you moved here?”

   “Oh, one of my guardians just got a new job in Inaba, so we had to relocate so they could be closer,” you explained. “Well, actually, they also got another job offer in Kyoto, but they wanted to settle with the one here in Inaba. So I was just like, ‘Alright,’”

   For some reason, this intrigued Yosuke. “Interesting,” he commented as he took a bite of his food. “So I assume your family is the quiet type, right?” 

   “Not exactly,” you shrugged. “I mean, I got some extraverted family members. But for a few months, my family began thinking maybe moving somewhere quieter would be a nice change. Not that they hated the city or anything, you know?” 

   “No worries, I get it,” Yosuke smiled at you. “Inaba might not be a big and interesting place, but you learn to like it over time,” 

   But at this moment, Yosuke felt a weird feeling in him when you chuckled, “Yeah, hopefully, I will,” you noted.

   Yosuke had no idea why he suddenly felt a bold of confidence. Just a moment ago, he was hesitant to invite you up to the rooftop for lunch! But he figured he would go through with it. 

   “If you want, I could show you around Inaba during the weekend! I can even bring along my friends, who are all not at school at the moment.”

   You pondered for a bit before you smiled. “That would be nice. I’ll consider it.” Then you tilted your head “And your friends are absent? Like, all of them?” 

   Yosuke chuckled sheepishly. “Yeah, literally all of them. All I know is that Yukiko is on vacation with her family, Chie got sick yesterday, and Yu lives in Tokyo. Not sure about Rise, Kanji, and Naoto. So I’m pretty much alone for the day.”

   Wait, he just caught himself. “Oh. Well, I guess ‘alone’ would be the wrong word now that I’m hanging out with you. Haha, oops!” he scratched the back of his head sheepishly. 

   The awkwardness was rubbing off on Yosuke, and he hated it. Why can he not ever be awesome? He was almost glad when you spoke up. Although, he was scared of your answer.

    “You’re all good,” you smiled as you closed your bento box and put it aside. “I mean, yeah. It honestly sucks when almost all your friends are absent from school. For me, I just sit in class and at lunch alone like, ‘This sucks. Why did you guys have to leave me?!’  

   “It’s kinda weird. Being an introvert, you would think I love lonely and having little to no friends. But no, I still need my small group of friends with me to make it through the school day, or else it will get boring as hell.” 

   Yosuke smiled. “Same here! My friends are great, even though sometimes they can be a pain in the ass. I can feel lonely when I’m not with them for long periods. It was why I wanted to invite you to eat lunch with me. And I also wanted to get a chance to get to know you after you arrived here a few days ago. 

   “Although, I gotta be honest. I was a bit worried that you would decline me. I dunno. I assumed you were the type of person who hated it when someone tries to talk to you. I-Is that a bit weird?” 

   Why are you asking if it's weird? OF COURSE, IT IS!

   Stop making this more awkward for yourself! For all you know, you’re probably making (L/N) uncomfortable!!

   OR HOW ABOUT YOU STOP OVERREACTING?!

   “Hanamura, it’s fine. Not weird at all!” you let out a light laugh. “Listen, it’s not necessarily a thing where I loathe people talking to me. But only if if they come up to me first. Other than that, I would much rather be quiet. If I’m with my close friends, then I can be a bit more talkative. 

   “But I mean, it’s so funny,” you continued, smiling. “My guardians say I’m such an extravert around my close friends and cousins. I talk so much around them, yet with strangers or people I barely know, I’m dead silent. I guess if I become more comfortable around a person, I won’t be as shy.” 

   God damn it, Yosuke knew this might be weird to ask. But he just had to know. “So…I assume you’re slowly becoming comfortable around me? I mean, you are talking a lot!”

   “I guess I am!” you said.

   Well, that was one hell of a quick answer. Eh, not that he minded! 

   Moments passed, but before Yosuke knew it, the both of you continued to talk more. It was not as if he had been around you for the longest time, but he felt like he knew more about you. He felt proud of himself for getting you to open up to him.

   And at this point, Yosuke looked up. He noticed how many of the students who were also on the rooftop were beginning to head inside.

   “Well, class is starting soon. We should probably get going before we’re late,” Yosuke suggested. You nodded in agreement, and both of you stood up. 

   “Hey, Hanamura,” you spoke up. In turn, Yosuke turned to face you and saw a soft smile on your lips (and a blush on his cheeks! Wait, no—).

    “Thanks for inviting me to lunch today, I enjoyed it a lot,” you thanked him, “And I appreciated you talking to me. You were the first person at school to have done that so far. Even though I like being alone, I still liked hanging out with someone after days of barely knowing anyone here.”

   Yosuke knew this for sure. He was proud of himself for offering you the invitation. If he had not, high chances were that you would have continued being quiet, and he would have no clue about who you were. So smiling back at you, Yosuke said, “It’s no problem at all, (L/N)! I enjoyed it, too. Wait, give me just a sec.”

   You tilted your head in confusion when Yosuke pulled out his phone and gave it to you. In a matter of seconds, you realized what the brown-haired boy wanted, judging by the screen showing. But still, you wanted to hear him say it. 

   “Put your phone number in here. And I can text you after school!” 

   With a soft chuckle, you did as Yosuke did. You especially loved seeing his eyes glisten with excitement after handing his phone back.

   And the both of you eventually went back to your classroom, feeling bliss in the air. 

[personuhh]

okay so awhile ago you posted something about Yosuke (crazy, right?) and in the tags I believe you mentioned something about how you don’t like Yosukes parents? Could you elaborate? bc I have not stopped thinking about it since you mentioned it (sorry this is so vague my memory is horrid skjdjfjgj)

OYSUEJGHHBKEJHDSGVDH oh my god okay SO. At first I just got ~vibes~ from him... like, I couldn’t quite pin down what made me think he had abusive parents, because obviously he never says anything to indicate it explicitly, but then I started noticing... small things.

I don’t want to say outright that I think they’re abusive (physically or verbally) and I also don’t think that Yosuke hates them, or necessarily even sees anything wrong with how they treat him, but I do think that their behavior has severely impacted Yosuke and led to a lot of the negative traits he displays.

To me, the most telling example is this conversation where he talks about Teddie being praised by his parents for being “thoughtful” very pointedly in front of him. It seems to be a reoccurring thing where they compare him to other people (primarily Teddie) and make him feel inferior. Yosuke’s a bit of a pushover, and frequently gets taken advantage of monetarily, and in this case he’s caved and lent Teddie a significant chunk of his savings for their trip to Tatsumi Port Island... only for him to spend it on presents to suck up to Yosuke’s parents which makes Yosuke look unthoughtful. Yosuke clearly sees it that way, even if Teddie hadn’t intentionally planned it out from the start as such (he calls Teddie “surprisingly shrewd”).

Yosuke gets told off either because a) he didn’t want to fight back/argue, and instead just took a passive stance instead of telling his parents that he was the one to lend Teddie the money in the first place, and thus didn’t have any left to buy them gifts, or b) his parents think so little of him that they don’t believe him at all. He specifically says he doubts his parents understand, which makes me think that he did try to explain the situation.

There are also several instances of a large Junes event being Yosuke’s responsibility, or at least of him thinking that he has to scramble to make things work, like the Junes concert, where he says he’ll have to move away if it doesn’t pan out; maybe this is his own thinking, but I also wouldn’t be surprised if it was something his dad said to scare him into helping, especially considering he MUST know that Yosuke is friends with Rise, or the time during the summer where he calls Yu and begs him to help out. Yosuke isn’t a manager, but he’s still got all the responsibilities of one, and even tries his best to work out other employees’ problems as well (look at his SL).

The Junes concert in particular really sent up some red flags for me, especially because Yosuke says this.

“Awfully nice for some reason”?

Yosuke’s got terrible self-esteem, there are countless times where he’s shown to be overwhelmed and embarrassed by completely genuine praise from his friends. In one of the drama CDs he mentions that he intentionally doesn’t try his best in school because he doesn’t want to disappoint himself by doing poorly while also knowing that he gave his all. It really makes me think that his parents just have an abysmally low opinion of him, and he’s adopted that same view of himself.

There’s also several scenes where he talks about his parents finding his porn (or Teddie showing it to them) and in his SL he says his mom “read the title out loud to [his] family” which on top of obviously indicating his family is pretty conservative about that kind of thing, also means he’s had to learn to be secretive with them to some extent. In Arena, Yosuke’s mother goes as far as burning the porn Teddie finds. Even if it's meant to be humorous, Yosuke's property is still being destroyed.

Now these next few things are more... abstract and can definitely be argued, but personally I still find them important to point out when discussing the topic.

Yosuke obviously struggles with toxic masculinity, and similarly to Kanji, feels like he needs to be the ideal, strong man that protects the weak, etc. Even without looking at specific dialogue, you can tell that Yosuke’s been raised to think he needs to be a “real” man, that displaying more “feminine” behaviors is a sign of weakness; because that isn’t just subtextual, it’s something he very visibly displays, it’s part of his arc. He can’t mourn and cry, he has to get revenge (because he couldn’t protect Saki at the time and he watched helplessly as she died, it makes it his fault), he says hugs are for girls (a common sentiment, but he had to learn it from somewhere), and any time he slips up and reveals his actual feelings, he has to overcompensate, let everyone know that he’s just your average teenage boy who’s definitely interested in women. Yosuke’s not the most masculine guy, he likes fashion and cares about his appearance (the bar is so low) and I’d bet that if he were given space to explore his interests without any expectations, he might actually find he’s into stuff that goes against what he’s been taught. He admits to liking crossdressing, then walks it back; not because he’s ashamed of it (on the contrary, once he realizes people found him cute, he openly brags about it), but because he thinks he SHOULD be ashamed of it.

It’s why he feels so threatened by Kanji, who completely takes him by surprise when he realizes his outer appearance and interests don’t match up. Now Yosuke’s got to compete with Kanji over who’s the manliest, show that he’s not like Kanji, because Kanji’s already accepted that side of himself, and it totally goes against everything Yosuke’s been taught to think is “normal”.

So then we look at lines like this.

On its own it’s nothing special, but it’s not just the slogan itself, it’s the way that Yosuke specifically says that his dad is still saying it. Combining this with what I mentioned previously about Yosuke’s behavior, and a few other tidbits, like Teddie mentioning that he watches violent war movies with Yosuke’s dad, it definitely makes me think he’s the type of guy who’d try and push Yosuke into being more masculine, being a traditional, unshakable, unemotional man.

Lastly, there’s the recently identified album on Yosuke’s shelf in arena, and what do you know, one of the songs on it (The Chain, by Mr. Big) has these lyrics...

In my mind, I see Yosuke’s mother as an incredibly controlling, strict woman who expects her son to be utterly perfect, and even when he’s good, it’s never good enough. Yosuke’s father is busy with Junes, and while he isn’t around the house too often, Yosuke sees him at work quite a bit, large and in-charge, not allowing anyone to see weakness, he leans on his son because he can’t bring himself to ask for help. Yosuke’s left to pick up the slack, and he’s taught by example that relying on others is cowardly, that being intimidating gets you further than being “nice”. Even though Yosuke obviously goes against this, he can't fully commit for fear of standing out and disappointing his parents, and that makes him passive; he ends up being a pushover, and neither of his parents are happy about that. He’s a “disappointment” to them, it’s one of his defining traits that everyone loves to bring up. It's something that's shown to really get under his skin, but he can never do much more than get angry, because he truly thinks he is a disappointment, he doesn't think highly of himself, even if he protests.

Maybe I’m reading into all of these things a little too much, but... I don’t know, I’ve said it before, but I just don’t see how half of Yosuke’s personality would have been shaped by anything other than his parents being Not Great.

[layercake]

Why Naoto is Heavily Trans Coded, and How The Discussion Surrounding Him Needs to Change

Hello, I’ve never written or posted anything like this before LOL so this is a bit daunting. But this subject is something that’s been bothering me for a long time, and I wanted to get it out somewhere. So let’s talk about how Naoto Shirogane is heavily trans coded, and how the fandom has a problematic culture surrounding the issue that really needs to change.

Tw // discussion of misogyny , transphobia , and mentions of harassment

Initial Shadow Confrontation 

Since the discussion is most often about what’s “canon” and what’s not, let’s first take a look at what the game actually does give us about Naoto’s character. During the confrontation with Naoto’s shadow, we learn that Naoto idolized detectives as a kid, and wanted to be one himself when he was older.

However, this posed a problem for him in multiple ways. One, he was (is) still a child, and the people in his field don’t take him seriously because of it. He tries desperately to escape this fact, to try and act as mature as possible, but ultimately he can’t change how others will perceive him at his age.

This is what the shadow confrontation focuses on most heavily. But then it switches to discussing the other part of the issue-- the fact that Naoto’s ideal image of a detective is a man, and he “isn’t.” 

At the end, Yukiko says “You must know already that what you yearn for isn’t to become an adult or to become a boy,” and Naoto accepts it. This is what most people point to when saying that Naoto can’t be trans, because he agrees that it wasn’t what he wished for. So, easy, right? If you take this as him telling the truth, then it looks like an open and shut case-- he isn’t trans. But Naoto’s actions don’t really fit what he says here. 

The issue starts with these next lines (below) in particular. To me, Naoto’s tone in the first line is regretful, and doesn’t strike me as a sentiment someone who is cisgender would necessarily hold. Why would he want to “change into a man?” To fit his ideal image of a detective? As he says here, yes.

(Real quick before I continue, it’s not clear in the dialogue screenshot but it’s important to note that Naoto does say “yes” to Yukiko’s question about him not liking being a girl. He nods his head)

The narrative that the game tries to go with after this is that the “ideal image” Naoto wanted to live up to, including the male aspect of it, was unattainable and formed primarily because he felt that was the only way he could be a detective. 

But, is this really that much of a problem? We all look up to certain types of people, people that we want to be like-- and for many, this can factor into gender identity as well. If Naoto really just wanted to be a cool, male detective, that doesn’t at all negate that being trans would be a part of that for him. 

Naoto’s other words and actions, as well as the framing of this scene as a whole, make the scenario feel a lot less believable to me for multiple reasons. Naoto never initiates the conversation that him wanting to be a boy is incorrect-- Yukiko does. Naoto isn’t even the one to trigger his shadow-- Kanji does that. Naoto had a lot less agency in a lot of these decisions than the other characters did with their shadows. 

Naoto’s Continued Actions

The fragility of the narrative Atlus put together for Naoto continues to grow throughout the rest of the game, due to the way he behaves after the initial shadow confrontation.

For starters, it’s implied that Naoto is not his birth name, something that i think a lot of people either miss or forget about-- and yet he continues to go by it throughout the course of the game. We never find out his deadname and he never expresses a desire to share it with anybody.

The day after the “reveal,” Naoto doesn’t change anything about his appearance, mannerisms, or how he presents himself. He honestly seems uncomfortable with the fact that everyone has found out, in a way that felt much like being outed to the whole school, as opposed to finally being seen and accepted for who you “really” are.

I understand that such a drastic shift in people’s perception of you would be overwhelming to anybody, no matter if you were cis or not. But if Atlus really wanted to hone in on the idea that Naoto was happy about this change, they could’ve at least made him…. Well, happy about it. Even if it was just a small smile, just a tiny indication of relief even despite how hard it will be to adjust, it would’ve made it at least a little more believable that this is what he really wanted.

But that’s not the case. Instead, he’s uncomfortable, he still binds, he still wears the school’s male uniform, and he still goes by Naoto. The only time any of this actually changes is if you as the protagonist push him to, which… is a whole other mess.

The fact that Naoto has even gotten to this point, though, speaks more volumes to me than anything else. Passing is not easy. Coming out is not easy. Naoto would have had to go through difficult lengths in order to get not only his school, but the country and media to see him as a man.  He’s a well-known "detective prince".. someone was bound to look up his records and find out about it. That's a huge risk to take.

In addition to this, he binds. He goes by masculine pronouns and a masculine name. He very audibly changes his voice to be more masculine. I don’t know how to tell you this, but this is just…. not something cis people do? At least not comfortably. 

In fact, doing all of this would have been incredibly uncomfortable for Naoto if he was cis. As someone who experiences dysphoria, looking like and being seen as a gender you are not can be really, really painful. If transitioning was something he really didn’t want, why would he put himself through all of that? Was it really to escape misogyny? Me asking this isn’t minimizing the issue at all, because I understand that it’s incredibly serious and hard for countless women. But I would generally think someone’s first reaction to facing misogyny isn’t to… completely change their identity and present as a different gender.

On top of being probably the hardest option of escaping misogyny available to him, and one of the most uncomfortable, presenting as a man doesn’t necessarily get rid of any prejudices Naoto may face. In fact, I would argue that it’s considerably more dangerous. Especially in a rural town like Inaba, where people seem to not really understand or approve of being LGBT. Naoto is smart, he would have thought of all of this. So why?

Inherent Transphobia of Naoto’s Arc 

There is something to be said about how much misogyny is present in Japan’s workforce, especially in fields like Naoto’s, and the importance there is in discussing that. The base idea behind his struggles and message isn’t inherently a bad one, but the way the game went about it was problematic because it put down transgender identities in the process.

The first time I watched Naoto’s shadow confrontation, it was really distressing to me. The game continuously repeats the idea that you can’t “cross the barrier of the sexes,” that Naoto “can never really be a man,” and  that “you can change your name, but you can never change who you “really” are.” I hope I don’t need to explain why this is a problem.

Naoto’s wish to be a man, regardless of what was driving it, is depicted as something temporary and childish. Something that Naoto “didn’t really want,”  something that was just an excuse to run away from the misogyny he was facing. Even if it was unintentional, this message is incredibly harmful to transgender people.

It would have been a better and much more coherent message about misogyny if the writers had steered clear of trans themes entirely. In fact, I think they did so well with Sae’s character in Persona 5-- she’s in the same field of work, facing very similar struggles, but she doesn’t react in the same way as Naoto at all. 

Kanji and Homophobia 

It’s even worse that Naoto’s “reveal,” on top of being problematic by itself, is used as a method to bury Kanji’s exploration of his own sexuality. The problems with Kanji’s own shadow are bad enough to warrant their own long rant, but the reveal that Naoto was “really a girl” this whole time allows the story to completely wave off his gayness for good.

This isn’t something unique to this game-- the trope of “two boys fall in love, but one of them turns out to be a girl so it’s fine” has been used numerous times in other media to explore the topic half-assedly. It plays with the “exoticness” or “drama” of a gay romance, but backs off at the end in order to uphold societal norms and prevent backlash. 

This doesn’t really give any kind of good commentary on gay relationships, nor does it depict them in a positive or helpful manner. It isn’t something that these games should be getting kudos for doing. 

Misogyny?

I think there’s also something to be said about how poignantly bad Atlus is at really tackling the problem of misogyny. It tries, especially with characters like Ann and Sae, and in certain aspects it can succeed. But then they have scenes like the pageant and Every Beach Scene Ever, where the women are forced to wear swimsuits or revealing clothing against their will, or their bodies are talked about without their consent. There is consistently a character in each persona game who is forced to do the whole misogynistic dipshit gimmick that’s supposed to be funny-- Junpei, Yosuke, Teddie, Morgana, Ryuji-- and while this is obviously not a Persona specific problem by a longshot, it’s still indicative of how unsuccessful these games often are in delivering the message that society’s systemic misogyny is an issue.

This is something I think about a lot when people try and argue that Naoto’s story can’t be about him being trans because it’s “an important message about misogyny.” Atlus often doesn’t deliver on such stories already, and they certainly didn’t with Naoto. As soon as Naoto returns to “living as a woman” he’s subjected to the same misogyny that the other girls are. His chest is commented on, he’s forced to be in the beauty pageant, he’s made uncomfortable in the bath scenes-- really, all Atlus did after the reveal was make the problem worse for him. 

On top of this, his story never actually meaningfully tackles the problem of misogyny in the detective force. It’s not a major part of his social link or the general plot of the game-- honestly, it’s barely even touched on at all after the initial confrontation. Thus, the idea that “Naoto can’t be trans because it erases a story about misogyny” is just plain untrue. There never was a coherent one in the first place.

Problems Within the Fandom

Despite all of this, there is such an intense backlash from the majority of the fandom if anybody dares to bring up these issues with Naoto’s story. Naoto being trans is generally seen as something ridiculous and stupid, or something to insult and mock people for.

I understand that there's always going to be people who say provocative stuff like this, no matter what anyone does, and that it’s not something exclusive to this particular fandom or character. But the problem is that this rhetoric isn't just from them anymore--the consensus among so much of the fandom seems to be either that Naoto absolutely cannot be trans, or that speaking about it at all is "annoying discourse" and taboo. Even from fans that are LGBT or allies themselves. 

This in and of itself is such a telling thing to me. if you find yourself getting angry about the subject, really ask yourself why. Is it such a problem for people to reclaim a transphobic story? Is it such a problem for a character to be trans in the first place?  There is room for discussion and nuance regarding this situation, but we have to make it for ourselves. We can accept that Atlus’s base game will never actually give us a coherent story about either misogyny nor being transgender with Naoto’s story. But petty arguments and insults thrown at people who bring up this topic isn’t any of that-- it’s just poorly masked transphobia. 

So at the end of the day, no, Naoto being is trans is not “canon.” Of course Naoto would not actually be allowed to be trans, he is a main character in a game series where the only explicitly LGBT characters have been consistently buried, stereotyped, or demonized with only a few rare exceptions.

Yes, you’re allowed to headcanon whatever you want about him. I can’t stop you from wanting a story about misogyny, or from seeing Naoto’s gender as something more fluid than I do. But you can’t ignore the fact that his story, as written in canon, is laden with transphobia despite its intentions. It’s not a ridiculous or harmful thing for trans people to want to reclaim that.

There are still a lot more issues with how Naoto is treated in the game-- especially in his romance route-- but that’s a whole other can of worms I’m not ready to unpack today lol

Hopefully all of this made sense though, and feel free to bring up anything else I may have missed or point out any issues you might have with it :-) Thanks for reading!

[yourfavisirredeemable]

souyo angst - post-true ending

y’all the souyo tag has been more active than I’ve seen it in a long time (I think cause of the PC release) which makes me happier than I can measure. I’ve loved persona 4 ever since 8th grade and souyo really is my favorite ship of all time. in celebration, here’s a bunch of angst headcanons I’ve been holding onto for 5 years, specifically related to the izanami battle/true ending. (they’re actually not necessarily souyo-specific, but since I ship souyo they kinda have that overall vibe)

- do y’all really think yu narukami is just gonna come away from that battle with izanami/being trapped in a time loop illusion for an untold period of time and NOT bring any trauma with him? cause I don’t

- specifically, he can’t get rid of a horrible, nagging thought that follows him even after the IT celebrates their victory - what if this is all still part of izanami’s illusion? izanami could have just nested an illusion inside of an illusion, and that way, she can defeat him without him even knowing it

- which would mean, of course, that his friends are all still dead and he’s just living it up with a bunch of illusions. his friends sacrificed themselves for him, while he gets to live out his summer days in peace surrounded by a perfect simulation.

- that thought is terrifying to him, and it only grows over time. there’s the horror of nothing being real and his friends being dead, compounded with the guilt of having abandoned them and the helplessness of never being able to know the truth. he has the cold realization one night that he’ll never again know for certain that the world he’s living in is the real one.

- but he tries to keep it to himself and act like he normally does. after all, if he can’t ever know for sure, why worry about it? this world is probably the real one - his friends seem normal, time keeps flowing like it usually does, and even the velvet room seems the same as it was before

- as hard as he tries, his doubts and fears are really impacting his mental health, which eventually affects the way he acts. it’s subtle, but the others eventually notice it - yosuke does first, since he knows yu the best.

- he notices that whenever there’s a silence, yu will stare off into space with a strained and even slightly fearful expression. he’s worried, but he just tries to be there for his partner like normal, figuring he’ll talk to him if he needs someone to rely on

- rise notices the dark circles under his eyes and asks about them, to which yu nonchalantly responds that his part time work keeps him a little busy. chie notices that he doesn’t seem to have as much fun when they work out or watch movies, and yukiko notices the way he starts withdrawing from conversations until he’s standing at the edge of the group, even quieter than normal.

- teddie and kanji don’t notice anything on their own, but eventually those who have started to get worried bring it up with the rest of the group. naoto, of course, has noticed everything, but nothing in yu’s behavior has indicated it’s anything worse than blues about leaving inaba or stress from work

- yu, for his part, realizes that his friends probably know something’s up, but every day he feels less and less motivated to tell them what’s actually wrong. after all, what would he even say - I’m afraid all of you are illusions, and my real friends are already dead? 

- plus, there’s the fact that saying his fears out loud would somehow make them feel more real. so instead, he tries to ignore them, and only spirals more

- he starts feeling really scared when he finds himself having the occasional violent thought toward his own friends - if the real yosuke’s dead, why should this illusion get to live? how dare an illusion pretend to be his best friend?

(more specific headcanons/fic ideas under the cut)

- imo, the possibilities for this headcanon are endless. you can take your hurt/comfort as far as you want it to go (personally, I love projecting my mental illness onto fictional characters so full depression/anxiety is definitely on the table), and the timeframe means any fics could be set either before or after he leaves inaba

- personally, I think it could be interesting if he returns to the TV world, perhaps to look for answers or just to blow off some steam, and finds out his shadow’s gotten loose again. which would ofc mean that now he’s trapped in the TV world with no persona, a shadow that for sure wants to kill him, and a dungeon of his own forming around him

- (btw, I know the TV world changes after the fight with izanami, but I think since it still exists and the IT still has personas, they can still have shadows as well)

- this would be an interesting way for the IT to find out what’s really been happening. they would notice yu missing and eventually check the TV world, whereupon they would find an entire dungeon and see yu’s shadow for the first time.

- the dungeon, I think, would have a lot of different elements - recurring rooms from dojima’s house to represent the time loop he was trapped in, an origami version of inaba to represent how everything seems fake, etc.

- as for his shadow, since I love to go full angst, I think it would be absolutely vicious. it represents the nagging belief that everything’s fake, his hatred toward himself for “abandoning” his friends and living a happy lie, and his hatred toward the IT for being illusions meant to replace his dead friends

- as a result, it would try to kill yu almost immediately after manifesting and attack the IT on sight. this would be particularly devastating for yosuke - he only found out that saki hated him (x to doubt, I’m still not convinced she actually didn’t like him but that’s another post) through her shadow, so being immediately attacked by yu’s shadow would be heartbreaking

- yu’s shadow wouldn’t feel any need to explain itself to an illusion, so it would just silently and violently attack him with a look of pure hatred. which would be a confirmation of his worst fear, that yu secretly doesn’t think of him as a partner or an equal, and in fact doesn’t even think of him as a friend.

- but of course he would soldier on, determined to save yu even in light of his “true” feelings. the rest of the IT would also bring up the fact that they don’t know the full story yet, and there could be a reasonable explanation for why yu’s shadow is so violent

- since I love to make my favorite characters suffer, I also like to headcanon that eventually yu would let his shadow kill him. or at least almost kill him, since the IT busts down the door before it’s too late, but at that point he’s unconscious and in no shape to accept or reject his shadow

- (he didn’t accept it before even though he knew he should because he didn’t want to accept his violent urges toward himself and especially toward his friends)

- so basically the IT just has to grab yu and run. I was thinking this headcanon through and my brain was like ‘why not throw in some extra souyo angst,’ so a barely conscious yu might pull a reverse uno card on yosuke and sacrifice himself to protect him, unwilling to let his friend sacrifice himself again

- which would ofc make things even worse for yosuke. aside from the obvious, there’s the confusion arising from the fact that yu’s shadow tried to kill him, but yu himself was willing to sacrifice his life for him

- either way, I think yu would be barely alive by the time they make it out of the TV world. from there it’s just a matter of him recuperating enough to go back in and accept his shadow, which is complicated by the fact that essentially being split in half across two dimensions is definitely not healthy.

- there’s plenty of angst in the recovery process, but this post is already super long and I wanna get into some of my other thoughts

- just a quick aside, I think as a perhaps less angsty headcanon yu might just be extra averse to yosuke sacrificing himself after they win against izanami, especially in the animated version where I think only yosuke sacrifices himself instead of all of their friends

- so the next time yosuke tries to sacrifice himself for yu he’d get an earful, maybe even accompanied by a breakdown where yosuke realizes how badly he scared his partner during the fight with izanami

- anyway, I also have a fun night in the woods-type idea relating to this - after yu leaves inaba, nothing seems real to him to the point that it actively breaks down his mental health

- it’s only when he returns to inaba or is with someone from inaba that the world doesn’t just look like a grayscale mesh of unsubstantial shapes

- which could lead to something interesting if yosuke (or your yu narukami pairing of choice) comes to visit him at his college dorm and finds it an absolute mess or barely decorated at all with a depressed yu inside, or if yu drops out of college entirely to return to inaba, baffling his friends and family because he was at a really good college and had a great future ahead of him, or if he returns to inaba and is terrified to find that sometimes it’s in grayscale too, or-

- the point is I’ve thought a lot about this and I love both persona 4 and night in the woods so I think it’s fun

- there’s also plenty of potential for yu to just break down and tell his friends what’s wrong in the real world before he leaves inaba, which could make for a great hurt/comfort oneshot

- all in all, I think yu would have definitely been traumatized by living in a time loop for who knows how long and there’s a lot of potential there. (don’t ask me about what I think would happen if margaret hadn’t gotten him out of the time loop cause that’s an even longer even darker post. or maybe do ask me)

anyway, I know the souyo fandom probably still isn’t exactly popping off but I hope anyone who finds this post enjoys it!

[thecottageinthedark]

Sorting Persona 4

Here again with another Sorting Hat Chats post! This one’s for Persona 4. Full disclaimer; this is based just on the game, not the anime. Also it’s behind a cut cause it is LONG. And has spoilers.

The system I’m using is explained here by @wisteria-lodge.

The Persona 4 MC, whose name is either Souji Seta or Yu Narukami depending on which supplemental materials you go by, is a really REALLY loud Badger secondary. His power is based on making Social Links with NPCs and shifting to become whatever they need-and also on patiently grinding to level up his attributes. And because he lives so much in this secondary-plus the fact that on a meta level he’s kind of a stand-in for the player-his Primary is hard to see.

But where it gets revealed in the end is the decisive moment when the ending you’re going to get is decided. The Investigation Team have discovered that Namatame’s been putting people into the TV, and thus are assuming he’s the murderer-and it’s become horribly personal, because one of the people he did that to was Nanako, and even though she’s been rescued, she’s deathly ill thanks to the TV World’s poison.

And now you-and the MC-have a choice. The IT are baying for Namatame’s blood, ready to kill. One Badger Primary method would be to appeal to the fact that he’s a person, you can’t just kill people….but nobody’s listening. Another would be to dehumanise him and say, he’s a murderer, he needs to die for the sake of everyone-going along with all the fury of the group. A Lion would lash out too-less because everyone’s doing it and more from their own gut feeling, but that would still lead to dead Namatame. A Snake might kill Namatame because he hurt Nanako...or, in the Golden remake, if they’ve done Adachi’s social link, they might cover for him. Either way, they’d be prioritising an inner circle member.

And all of those get you bad endings. Especially the Snake choice to cover for Adachi.

What gets the good ending, the happy ending where the MC is fulfilled and at peace, is to ignore all the emotion that’s running so high, and order everyone to step back and take time to think about whether the theory of Namatame being the killer makes sense. Pounce on the niggling little detail that doesn’t fit, and realise that the assumption everyone is labouring under isn’t true. And then prioritise the actual truth over personal loyalties or emotional reactions.

Bird Primary.

Because of course. This is a detective story. Your party are called both the Investigation Team and the Seekers of Truth. Even the title song hints at it; find the truth (Bird) by getting together with others (Badger).

Yosuke Hanamura’s a young, immature Snake Primary at game start, with the selfishness typical to that. His Shadow throws that back in his face, and he realises he doesn’t like being an asshole whose secret gut reaction to murders happening is ‘well at least I’m not bored anymore now something is happening in this dead-end town’.

So he does two things pretty much at the same time; he widens his inner circle to let in first Souji and then the rest of the IT, and he adds a model on top to let him care about things outside that circle. I think it’s a Lion model-a young Lion, just like his Snake, that edges into Glory Hound, but keeps hold of the idea that you should do certain things because they’re just right.

(It’s not based on the MC, though the MC is undoubtedly his most important person, who he even calls his partner. But then, as I said, the MC’s Bird is very quiet, so it’d be hard for Yosuke to perceive it well enough to mimic it. I think it’s actually based on Chie, who is after all the inner circle member he has known longest!)

And his secondary? Yosuke’s a support guy. He lifts his friends up. His family run Junes, and he leverages that connection to create a base location for the IT and secure a portal into the TV world that’s big enough to be usable. When Teddie comes to the human world, it’s Yosuke who gives him a place to stay. He’s a Badger secondary, and again, this makes perfect sense. The Lover sorting. No wonder so much of the fandom ships him with the MC.

Chie Satonaka is LOUD and BRASH and if you are a jerk she will KICK YOU IN THE FACE. She is so goddamn Lion Secondary, and utterly unapologetic about it.

Her primary, I think, is Lion again. The reason she has gotten possessive of Yukiko (as her Shadow calls her out on) isn’t that she wants Yukiko to be just hers-it’s that she wants to be Yukiko’s knight. Saving the princess is actually a textbook Lion cause. It lets her feel heroic and brave.

But that’s not good for either of them. Damsel in distress is a shitty role, one that doesn’t allow Yukiko to be strong and capable herself, and Chie pushing Yukiko into that role is really straining their relationship. It’s also something that Chie herself knows is wrong-that’s why her Shadow accuses her of it. (“I am a Shadow, the true self...”)

So instead Chie changes gears, because oh look a new Cause just popped up! Find the killer and bring them to justice! And on top of that, there’s always sexist prats to kick.

Yukiko Amagi models Badger Primary, because it’s expected of her. Running an inn is a really Badger kind of job. She also models Badger Secondary, for the same reasons. She feels this is who she’s meant to be; sweet, gentle, socially adept, community-focused and hard-working. The traditional Japanese ideal of womanhood.

But it chafes. The weight of societal expectations feels crushing. She doesn’t want to do stuff just because she’s meant to, because people think she should. She’s an Internal Primary, and needs to follow the voice of her own heart.

And where that heart leads her...is back to the Amagi Inn, except now she’s decided that she’s doing this for herself. She needed to feel that she could actually choose to not inherit the inn, before she could realise that she wanted to run it. She’s a Snake Primary, and the inn is important to her because it’s hers.

Her secondary...actually I get the feeling she’s like Toph Beifong of Avatar, a Snake who likes to spend most of her time in neutral. She is delightfully quirky and weird, and owns that, but she doesn’t charge like a Lion and she’s comfy with wearing masks when the situation calls for it.

Kanji Tatsumi panics at the idea that he might be gay, and caretakes like a boss, and that might look at first sight like a Double Badger who’s scared that he might be one of the people he’s used to dehumanising. His Shadow screams that it wants to be accepted...but what calms it is when Kanji himself accepts it, and says that this resolution is about being true to himself. Kanji’s a Double Lion who burnt his primary because being given shit for the feminine, queer-coded parts of himself made him lose faith in his internal compass, worrying that it was leading him somewhere that he viewed as bad. Internalised homophobia’s a bitch of a thing.

Accepting his Shadow is the start of Kanji healing his primary-letting go of shame for being an oddball and telling the world to go fuck itself if it thinks it can make him conform. He does model Badger Secondary-as I said, he caretakes like a boss-but that’s more a thing he does as a gift to others. When it comes to solving problems, he charges in swinging, ready to beat up anyone from biker gangs to otherworldly monsters.

Rise Kujikawa is a cheerful, shameless Snake Primary, loving and ambitious. She became an idol to make friends, and enjoys the fame it gets her. And when she needs to take a break for the sake of her mental health, she has no compunctions about doing so.

But she needed that break because the idol life was stressing her out-unsurprisingly, it’s a really intense life. And the particular problem she had was to do with the conflicting expectations the public has of celebrities. Perfection is demanded...but so is authenticity.

Rise realised that she was face-shifting as an integral part of her career, and this knowledge sent her into a tailspin. The fans don’t like the real Rise Kujikawa-they like Risette. But who is the real Rise Kujikawa? She doesn’t know! It’s frightening! What if she’s just made of smoke and mirrors? How does she find out what’s underneath?

And the answer she comes to is that there is no real Rise Kujikawa...which is the same as saying that there is no false one. Rise is Risette is Rise, it’s all just her, adapting to the context as she needs to. She’s a Badger Secondary, and the act of performance is the true self.

And for her, that’s a good answer-it brings her peace. But now we need to talk about Teddie.

Because just hearing Rise say ‘there’s no real me’ sends Teddie into a Shadow crisis right there.

He completely fucking loses it. He’s a denizen of the TV world-he’s been immune to it all this time, never manifesting a Shadow, but this is what breaks him. And that just screams Bird Lion. It’s his Buzz Lightyear moment-or rather his first Buzz Lightyear moment, because there are two. This is the first, and he survives it by retreating into his Secondary. It allows him to bring Shadow Teddie under control...but this isn’t sustainable. He’s realised something terrible and can’t avoid that knowledge indefinitely.

And soon enough he admits it to himself (and to the MC). He is a Shadow, that somehow became self-aware. His Truth was never true. He can’t handle it, he has no idea how to even exist, and he outright tells the MC that he intends to commit suicide.

He recovers, though-and he does so because the MC tells him Nanako survived. That’s the first thing that gives him a glimmer of hope, because his Truth already had some Snakey elements in there about chosen people and ambitions. He comes back from the brink, reshapes his system to centre those Snake principles, and returns to the side of his friends.

Lastly, Naoto Shirogane, our other queer-coded character. (I’m using she pronouns for the sake of canon here-but I’m a firm believer in nonbinary Naoto, for the record.) I think she’s a Bird secondary-the only one of those here, jeez. She’s just so analytical. She’s a rapid-fire Bird too, Detective Prince working on a case, squarely in the middle of her comfort zone. But push her out of it-into a normal teenager social situation, say-and watch her squirm!

She has a Bird Primary performance, too. But performance is the operative word here. She’s trying to look adult and smart and collected, in order to be taken seriously by the police officers she works with. And she is smart, mind you, but that’s not the why of her though it is the how. It’s not Naoto who goes ‘wait, let’s think about this, we need more information’ at the crucial point, but the MC, who really is a Bird Primary. Naoto was the one to suggest doing a little vigilante justice vis-a-vis murdering Namatame.

Her real Primary is Lion. Being a detective is a Cause for her, not a Truth, and she is blazingly certain of her own sense of what’s right-so much so that she doesn’t stop and check it against other people’s. And she inspires people! She doesn’t even mean to, and certainly doesn’t know why, but she is just so cool that people flock to her and admire her. ‘The Detective Prince’ is, when you think about it, a really Lion Bird kind of title!

Her Shadow has two issues with her. First, it harps on the gender angle. Hey, self, there’s that thing about your identity that you’ve been refusing to think about! You need to go poke at it! And then it breaks down into a scared child. Self, your performance is eating you alive. You need to do it, yes, the Cause demands it, but you also need to be able to stop sometimes and let yourself have emotions!

In short:

MC/Souji/Yu: Bird primary, Badger secondary

Yosuke: Snake primary, Badger secondary, models Lion primary

Chie: Lion primary, Lion secondary

Yukiko: Snake primary, Snake secondary, with Badger primary and secondary models that start out pretty unhealthy for her. 

Kanji: Lion primary that starts out burnt and begins to unburn after his Shadow fight, Lion secondary. Models Badger secondary.

Rise: Snake primary, Badger secondary

Teddie: Bird primary, Lion secondary. Falls dramatically and recovers by shaping his system to be more Snakelike.

Naoto: Lion primary, Bird secondary, performs Bird primary

[i-just-wanna-be-called-sparkle]

Okay. Killer Teddie AU time. Full spoiler warning ahead for P4 and even a bit of P5. Full timeline of all events in order up ahead. Smaller details and ideas at the very end of it. Some of this might not make sense or have an explanation because, at the time, I hadn’t finished base game Persona 4 and had no idea of stuff like Izanami, Sagiris, and so on and so forth. Even now, I haven’t yet finished P4G. The next time I work on this AU will be after I’ve finished P4G and have a good grasp on everything to change what doesn’t make sense and add stuff that does. For now take what I’ve worked on thus far. Sorry if some of my explanations are a little wonky. Extremely fucking long post ahead, I’m seriously not joking around this time.

And, before I start, I’m not the only one who worked on the AU! This is a team project between me and my gf! I know it’s not much to say, but I want to give half of the credit to her rather than taking all of it for myself, cuz while a lot of these ideas came from me, a lot came from her, too.

So, let me explain why Teddie’s a killer in the first place. It starts when he’s still just a mindless Shadow, and he comes face to face with a group of Persona users that existed long before the investigation team, consisting of Tohru Adachi, Mayumi Yamano, and a lot of miscellaneous unnamed characters who may or may not be made into proper characters in the futures. Why this first group existed and consists of those characters is one of those things that hasn’t been fully thought through yet. But, one thing’s for sure, they love going into the TV world and just beating up Shadows for fun every once in a while. At this point in the story, Shadows aren’t necessarily hostile yet, so basically, Teddie witnesses a bunch of his own kind get slaughtered for no reason and, probably because he’s starting to grow some kind of consciousness at this point, goes buck wild and kills the whole group save for Tohru Adachi, who manages to escape. This is how Mayumi Yamano meets her demise and also, how Teddie grows a proper body - it isn’t that bear suit of his though, it’s a human body, most likely the result of humans being the only thing he was exposed to aside from Shadows in that world. From that point forward, a fiery hatred for humans begins to develop within him.

Y’know how Teddie’s real crafty, making those glasses for the Investigation Team to use to see better in the TV world? Well, after a while, he decides he’s tired of walking around bear naked and makes himself some clothes to wear. Those fingers aren’t dexterous for nothing. Not too long after he makes these clothes, Saki ends up in the TV world - for another reason that wasn’t thought through well enough yet, but it’s something like she has a Persona too. This AU is very generous with who gets Personas, I know, please bear with it for now. She ends up bumping into Teddie, the two interact, and because Saki’s a little bitch she finds Teddie to be quite strange, what with the way he talks and how he apparently “comes from the TV world,” and is very verbal about it - very rude about it, too. This first impression with a new human + Teddie’s already intensifying hatred for humans = Saki’s gruesome demise. “Are all humans like this?” Is what Teddie thinks. “Are they all cruel? Are they all mean?” Teddie now has a stronger hate for Humanity that only grows stronger and stronger the more he’s forced to sit in that quiet TV world and think and think and think and think about it.

And along with that hate for humanity, comes a hate for his current human form. So he crafts himself that bear suit of his, and wears it all the time - I believe he also makes it so whatever he bumps into next doesn’t think he’s weird sounding or weird speaking or weird… looking, which, I’ll describe now rather than at the end of the post. Teddie doesn’t look all that different, but the main changes are that his eye colour is now a duller, greyer shade of blue, he is overall even paler, and he is also a lot skinnier. No real reason for these design choices aside from self indulgence without going too overboard. Moving on from that, not too long after he makes the suit is when Chie and Yu and Yosuke go in for the first time. Teddie keeps on a facade of innocence and happiness for a “good first impression,” and nothing changes from then up until the appearance of Yosuke’s Shadow. Since a Shadow is the side of oneself that they don’t want to acknowledge or see, it’s chock full of bad traits and negative emotions - further solidifying Teddie’s belief that all humans are just awful, sinful, nasty creatures.

One thing that Isn’t well thought out at all, and something that I have no clue where to put on the timeline, is this whole deal between Teddie and Namatame. Basically, Teddie communicates with Namatame through the TV (can’t remember if he just talks through it, or sticks his head through), and convinces Namatame to start pushing people in not to save them, but for something along the lines of how he “secretly wants them to die.” Maybe it was because Namatame shares Teddie’s beliefs of humanity being repulsing, but it’s too vague a memory to make heads or tails of it. Don’t know how things would work out without it, though, so it’s sticking around as is for now.

Also, as of right now in the AU, the IT is completely unaware of Teddie’s human form hiding right under his bear form/bear suit. Good lord, I am already tired of typing this all out, this post is so long. Still got a long way to go, kind of.

Here’s another loose idea that hasn’t been fully thought about, and it’s when Teddie encounters his Shadow in Rise’s dungeon. My memories are a bit foggy on this one, but I’ll try my best to remember. So, his encounter with his Shadow stays largely the same, with maybe a couple of his Shadow’s lines being changed to represent how not only is he hiding originally being a Shadow from his teammates, but also how he’s hiding the fact that he’s the killer they’re trying to find - all of it is too vague for the IT to piece together, though. But also a thing that’s changed is his reaction to his Shadow is a LOT more aggressive, a slip up to show a small glance of his true personality - but again, the IT doesn’t think anything of it because, Teddie’s facing his Shadow here, of COURSE he’s going to act different when he’s coming face to face with a part of himself he wants to ignore. Eventually, he manages to accept his Shadow, but for one way or another, a second Shadow starts to develop within him. Maybe it’s because he only partially accepted his Shadow, maybe it’s because of something else - like he didn’t accept his Shadow for the right reason, I can’t remember. But it starts to develop. I remember wanting to give him a second persona akin to what Akechi has in p5 - one for lies, and one for truths, but this is one of those things that will either need to be completely cut out or heavily modified in my opinion.

Teddie kills more frequently in this AU. In between when he’s helping the IT rescue people from the TV world, he’s throwing in people on the night that it fogs up so the IT doesn’t have time to see people appear on the TV/doesn’t have time to go in and save them, resulting in their deaths. Teddie so far has only thrown in people who have been assholes or scum in his eyes, and these are the only people that end up dying in the TV world even with the advent of the IT. Teddie gets away with this by sneaking out at night sometimes and either witnessing these people do disgusting things, or overhearing about it. Two candidates/victims are the two girls from Yosuke’s social link (hopefully you know who I mean) and the bully/bullies from Chie’s social link. Though, for the two girls, I like the idea of it being AFTER Teddie comes to the real world for real and shows off his human form, and starts working at Junes. He’s “working overtime,” late at night, calls up those two girls and asks them to come to Junes to “help him stock shelves” - “I’ll make sure you and your friend get payed extra for it. I’ll take it out of Yosuke’s paycheck.” Next thing you know, they’ve been knocked out and thrown into the TV because they’re heartless assholes in his eyes.

Only way Teddie would get away with a killing like that, though, is through having an outfit to disguise himself from Junes’ security cameras - so, at some point in the timeline, that’s what he does. Repurposes his old clothes from the TV world into an outfit to disguise his identity, to let him keep killing, and he keeps it tucked away either somewhere in the real world or in the TV world. He probably does this before he “becomes human,” so that his clothes are kept secret from the IT team, and that whole “I’m like a newborn in here” scene can happen.

Also, just for clarification, that hate Teddie felt for Yosuke’s Shadow? And how it solidified his hatred for humanity yet further, and his belief that they are all scummy beings? This keeps happening for every single Shadow he sees. Chie’s, Yukiko’s, Kanji’s, etc.

Mitsuo Kubo is the only one thrown in by Teddie who doesn’t die, so that the plot can progress normally, but also because it probably went something like this. Teddie sneaks out late at night to find more disgusting humans to kill, to “purge the earth of such horrendous beings,” and comes across Mitsuo killing Morooka. A human? Committing murder? A human being slaughtering another human being? How sinful. How disgusting. How treacherous. Teddie has to deal with this immediately. So he throws Mitsuo into the TV world without waiting for the fog to settle first (it’s too dire of a situation to ignore, after all). He’s kind of hypocritical, thinking Mitsuo is a terrible person for committing murder (he is, though) and then going right ahead and throwing him in the TV, aiming to kill. He’s just cleansing the world, though - that’s how he sees it.

Also, I believe for most nights when he decides to sneak out, he’s wearing his disguise outfit, so that he doesn’t get caught if he’s in a situation like that where he kills someone on a whim - or just to avoid being caught when he’s out so late snooping around for more victims. Random fun fact by the way: the idea for this whole AU started from the fact that Teddie could use his knowledge of the TV world and how it works to easily get away with using it to commit crimes. Moving on now.

Another thing that doesn’t yet have a place in the timeline is this small thing. I like to think Teddie has a tendency to stay up later into the night because of his occasional nightly outings, and he doesn’t really have enough time to fix his sleep schedule - or he actually just CAN’T. But anyways, he’s keeping himself busy at night while he can’t sleep, maybe playing on an old console in Yosuke’s room, when Yosuke wakes up and starts talking to him until he also gets tired enough to fall back asleep. He says to Teddie that he’s worried about him. “You’ve got bags under your eyes, and you’re basically made of flesh and bone.” He says. Maybe Teddie’s skinny enough his ribs show a little. “This isn’t the first time you’ve stayed up this late, either. Like you’re restless about something.” Sometimes Teddie just paces around the room until he gets tired enough to pass out. “And, what time is it, like, 2:00 AM? I’m really worried about you, Ted.” And that really gets to Teddie. He starts to cry. Here he is, devoting his time to hating humanity, to killing humans, to putting on a happy go lucky, innocent facade around his “friends” to hide his true nature and keep himself emotionally distant from them - and poor Yosuke over here is oblivious to it all, worrying for his dear friend and roommate like this is all unnatural when it’s what he truly is on the inside. And for just a moment, Teddie feels truly bad, and he just keeps crying and crying and crying, probably while Yosuke holds him and tries to comfort him, until he exhausts himself, goes to sleep, and pushes it all out of his head the next morning. But on that night, he had let his guard drop, and he had let himself be vulnerable, and he had allowed himself to get a little closer to Yosuke - a little more attached to him than before. It was only a little, but it was enough to be concerning… it was “just a little” too much for comfort. He can’t let himself get close to that thing.

Oh no, I’m starting to lose focus. We’re nearing the end now. So, you know how Teddie makes that promise to Nanako, right? That he’ll stay in their world to play with her and such? He probably makes the same promise in this AU.

I say probably, because depending on wether he did or not leads to two separate endings, and I can’t decide on which I like more.

So, if he DOES make the promise, HE’S the one who pushes Nanako in. The reason? He’s getting too attached. He’s letting his guard down around a human, and that scares him. He’s getting emotionally attached and invested, and that scares him. He’s starting to care about something that he hates with all of his heart, and that scares him. So he pushes her into the TV, because he’s not allowed to do that, because all humans are evil - no exceptions. This results in Teddie being outed because, when Nanako dies in the hospital (don’t know how that happens yet without Namatame, plothole), he can’t handle the guilt anymore. It’s overwhelming him, suffocating him, drowning him. He falls to the floor, completely breaking down, screaming and sobbing about how it’s all his fault. Then, he either runs out of the room and throws himself into a TV after realizing he’d outed himself, or Yosuke throws him into a TV in a fit of rage and because he feels like Teddie betrayed his trust by pretending to act all innocent when he was the killer.

If he DOESN’T make the promise, or at least, doesn’t get attached, Namatame throws her into the TV and things play out the exact same until they get to the top of Heaven, where Teddie completely loses his shit at Namatame. Maybe he goes to beat the fuck out of him, maybe he’s screaming and shouting at him, in any case, he’s showing his raw personality now. That isn’t what outs him, though - it’s Namatame. “I recognize you.” He says, either through his voice or his appearance. “Why are you so mad at me? I’m doing what you told me to. I’m doing what you want.” Something along those lines. “What?” The IT reacts. “Teddie, is this true? Have you been lying to us?” And the only thing Teddie can do is freeze up, and run away, out of the dungeon - probably not without beating up Namatame a little more for outing him. “Fuck you.” It’s like an endless stream of insults and vulgar language pour from his mouth. “You’ve gone ahead and exposed me, you bitch. You little shit. I hate you. It’s all your fault.”

Now on to Teddie’s dungeon. This part is, uh… Pretty dark. General content warning for death ahead.

So, to contrast Nanako’s dungeon Heaven, Teddie’s dungeon is Hell. There are two concepts for this dungeon though - one is that it’s just conventional catholic/christian Hell, and the other was that it’s based off of/is the frozen over Hel in norse mythology. Because, Teddie has ice attacks, you know? But they’re both largely the same, if not visually. In the earlier floors, there are some objects strewn around like burnt and torn up images of Teddie and the IT, Teddie and Nanako, his bear suit, and maybe one or two other objects of some importance to him. The voices that are heard at the beginning of all the early floors consist of Teddie sobbing and dealing with his inner turmoil of hating humans but getting attached to the likes of Yosuke, Nanako, the IT overall, and the like. “They’re humans.” He thinks. “They’re humans, and all humans are awful. I hate all of them. But I love them. They’re different… They’re nice to me. I don’t deserve it.” “Maybe humanity isn’t so bad after all…” “*sobbing* I’m sorry, Nana-Chan…”

You know how earlier dungeons like Yukiko’s and Kanji’s have that floor in the middle of the dungeon where you encounter the Shadows and that weird title card thing appears? That exists in Teddie’s dungeon, and on the floor right before it, the voice at the beginning of the floor is just Teddie screaming hysterically, maybe even crying. Why? Well, when you go to that next floor…

There’s Teddie. Standing in front of the hanging corpses of Nanako and Yosuke, hesitantly reaching out to them like he can’t process what he’s looking at. And when the IT calls out to him from behind him, the way he looks at them is estranging. He looks terrified, he has to do a double take because one second he was staring at Yosuke’s corpse, then the next moment, he was looking at him, perfectly alive, with the IT. They try and reach out to him, but he’s like a spooked wild animal, and he runs away to the next floor.

The later floors are now decorated with Nanako and Yosuke’s corpses, possibly even the rest of the IT, and the voices now are just Teddie arguing with himself and screaming hysterically, like he’s going insane being in such a horrible place, like he’s becoming more and more deranged with every passing moment. “This is how it should be! All those heartless monsters DESERVE to die! They deserve to hang lifelessly this! But they don’t! I don’t want them to die! I don’t think like that! But I do! But I don’t! These guys are horrendous- no, they’re my friends! THEY’RE SCUM OF THE EARTH! NO, I DON’T THINK LIKE THAT!” And so on and so forth.

When they finally reach the last floor, the deepest floor, the final circle of Hell, they find Teddie there, deranged to the point of practically being a different person. That second Shadow that was developing within him now is toying with him, messing with his head, whispering things to him that make him clutch his head and beg for it all to stop. The IT can’t get through to him now, and he either snaps, gets hostile at them for being “heartless, monstrous, evil humans,” and forces them into a fight, or that Shadow ends up possessing him (either fully, or to a certain extent), and they have no choice but to fight him and knock some sense into him. In either case, he gains his second Persona - something that will most likely be similar to Magatsu-Izanagi, not sure yet - and also, for the sake of self indulgence, it’s like he can control wether or not he is more or less like a Shadow. AKA, goopy black forearms fitted with deadly sharp claws instead of fingers.

I can’t actually remember what EXACTLY happens after the battle, aside from Teddie Goes To Prison, but here’s another battle outcome I almost forgot about that I am DETERMINED to add into the final product. Remember at the beginning, when I specified that Adachi was the only member of the first group of Persona users to survive Teddie’s slaughter? Well, at some point, he overhears the IT talking about Teddie being the killer and the TV world’s existence and decides to butt in. “Can I come along too?” He asks. “I’m a Persona user, just like all of you. You’re talking about catching the culprit here, right? The same culprit who killed Mayumi in the beginning? The same culprit who probably almost got me, then?” Something along those lines. So, he goes in with them, and would you look at that - Teddie still hasn’t forgotten his face. So, in the case of “Teddie snapping and going all hostile on them,” it’s most likely because he sees Adachi mixed in with the IT and alllll of those emotions from so long ago come flooding back… combine that with his hysteria, and boom, you’ve got a raging Teddie hell bound on taking his revenge and getting some closure before he either goes to prison or dies trying not to.

And… I think that’s it. Only thing left to mention is that at some point, right before my hyperfixation ended, me and my gf were trying to figure out a way to implement an accomplice ending and a Teddie Arcana Change, but the end of my obsession came too early in the development of both of those, so there’s not much to say. Also, in this AU, I’m thinking of making Shadows hostile because of the first group of Persona users, like how Teddie hates all of humanity almost purely because of that group. Also, small detail, he’s wearing that disguise of his during the fight - dunno how he got it, but I do wanna add it in somehow, though. This post is also already long enough, so I should stop myself here.

Speaking of that, holy fuck, thanks to anyone who’s read this entire long ass messy post. Like that is just so awesome, I commend you for it. Seriously this post took actual hours just to write down, it’s way too long for any NORMAL person to read all the way through, heavy emphasis on normal (affectionate). Asks about this AU are welcomed and appreciated, if there are any. If not, seriously literally just the fact that anyone might be reading this message at all is enough to sustain me.

[rjr1396]

Fake Dating AU

Based/inspired off of this 

So I know very little of Persona Q so bear with me. Souyo + Akimina

Imagine that somehow, the events of both persona 3 and 4 are going on at the same time (don’t worry about the logic) outside of the events of persona Q

When Minato/Makoto’s partner ended up being Yosuke, he didn’t mind. Sure he did hope for a certain boxer, but a fellow music lover is the next best thing he figures. Hell Yosuke seems all for it, so this shouldn’t be that bad.

The moment Yosuke said that he and Minato/Makoto were destined partners, Souji/Yu tried to not visibly wince, weren’t they partners? He had to remind himself that it didn’t mean anything, it was just the gimmick for this part of the labyrinth

Akihiko on the other hand didn’t expect the sudden flare of irritation of seeing his leader with Yosuke. He didn’t even realize that he was clenching his fists until Mitsuru grabbed his wrist and gave him a look that somehow said ‘Calm down’ and ‘Don’t do something stupid’. He tried calming down, but the moment he caught Shinji’s knowing smirk, he resorted to glaring at the ground trying to figure out why he’s acting like this. 

Minato/Makoto and Yosuke seemed to hit it off well, a little too well for Souji/Yu and Akihiko’s liking. The music lovers stuck together after that. Minato/Makoto noticed that Yosuke was a pretty good strategist and quite level headed when he needed to be, he was the second in command of the IT for a reason, he needed to be whenever their leader was too impulsive. Plus with how well he worked with Souji/Yu, they were a hell of a unit and asset to the team as a whole. Even Akihiko had to begrudgingly agree that Yosuke was strong, he still didn’t like the guy being a little too buddy buddy with his leader.

After everything was said and done, before each group went their separate ways, Yosuke and Minato/Makoto swapped info/numbers to keep in touch. They text every day.

Souji/Yu tried not to get too upset with that development, Yosuke didn’t have any friends outside of the IT so this is good for him, makes him happy, right?

Mitsuru kept telling Akihiko that it was good that Minato/Makoto have friends outside of SEES. They had to admit that he was smiling more now and Yosuke’s friendship was helping him open up more. Still, it didn’t help with the irritation or the bitterness he felt when he caught a smile that Yosuke help make. He may or may not have punched threw a few punching bags imagining they were of his face.

Minato/Makoto helped Yosuke realize that he may not be as straight as he thought he was, what do you mean I have feelings for Partner? For Souji/Yu?

Once Yosuke fully accepted himself, (Yes Yosuke you’re not straight, No this isn’t a phase, Yes you are somewhat socially inept at times, but this is more than that and you know it, No you can’t keep denying it unless you want to deal with another shadow, now get over yourself) he decides to come out to his parents

It goes well, though they are now convinced that the main reason he came out was because he had a boyfriend and after trying to tell them otherwise, he accidentally says that Minato/Makoto is his boyfriend who lives in Iwatodai.

“So I may have messed up a little.” ‘What did you do?’ “I may have told my parents that we were dating since they refused to believe that I didn’t have a boyfriend since I was coming out to them.” ‘….’ “Please.” ‘….’ “I’ll buy you beef bowls for a month.” ‘*sigh* Fine.’ “Yes! Thank you! AlsotheywanttomeetyouI’lltextyouthedetailslaterkthanksbye!” ‘…Wait what?’ *Hangs up*

Fuuka: Hey, how was your day? Minato/Makoto: Apparently I have a boyfriend now. Everyone: WHAT?!

The moment Minato/Makoto makes that announcement, says that Yosuke is now his boyfriend, everything falls into place for Akihiko. He had romantic feelings for Minato/Makoto and he was jealous of Yosuke. Shinji calls him an idiot. Mitsuru is a little more sympathetic but she still calls him an idiot too.

Teddie, busy with work doesn’t know the whole story, just that Yosuke’s dating someone, so he proceeds to tell the rest of IT, starting with Sensei. “Sensei, Sensei! Did you know that Yosuke’s scoring?” ‘…What?’

Minato/Makoto goes to Inaba for a visit the next holiday, staying with the Hanamuras. Yosuke’s parents end up loving him. They urge the couple to enjoy themselves in town which they do, Where’s my beef bowl Hanamura?

The IT decide to ask about what Teddie’s been telling them, C’mon Teddie, we’d know if Yosuke were dating anyone. They all meet up at Junes, Minato/Makoto hanging nearby out of sight for everyone but Yosuke in case he needs backup.

Yosuke comes out to the group (’I KNEW IT!’ “Shut up Chie!”) and they’re all okay with it, though the punch in the arm by Kanji was to be expected (”I really am sorry, man” ‘ts cool, but I will kick your ass if you bring it up again’ “Understood!”). Naoto and Yukiko applaud him for his bravery and willingness to open up to the group, Souji/Yu smiles and says that he’s happy for him (Internally crying for joy, he may have a chance!) Rise is the one who asks about him ‘scoring’. Yosuke waves Minato/Makoto over and announces that they’re dating. Something in Souji/Yu breaks a little.

The IT all accept Minato/Makoto. Souji/Yu pull him to the side to be alone for a bit Souji/Yu: You better not hurt him. Minato/Makoto: Wouldn’t dream of it. Souji/Yu: I’m being serious! Minato/Makoto: So am I.

Souji/Yu had never been more tempted to throw someone into the TV world til now, Yosuke was his best friend, his Partner, who did Minato/Makoto think he was getting in between them? (but he makes Yosuke happy, isn’t that what matters?)

Minato/Makoto: Yosuke, how long are we gonna keep this up? Yosuke: We’ll just wait til you go back to Iwatodai and then say that we broke up because of artistic differences, but decided to stay friends. Minato/Makoto: Did- did you just quote Chicago? Yosuke: ….Maybe.

Yosuke’s parents suggest that Yosuke go to Iwatodai for the 2nd half of the holiday break, so he does. When they arrive at the dorms, SEES welcome Yosuke amicably

Mitsuru: If you hurt him, know that they’ll never find your body. Yosuke: UH…

Akihiko maintains his distance from the couple (’It’s your fault for not figuring it out sooner, Aki.’ “Shut up Shinji!”), but it’s a bit harder to do when Yosuke joins them during the Dark Hour and into Tartarus. Everyone finds it sweet when Yosuke goes to help Minato/Makoto up when he gets knocked down, snaps him out of a status effect, or just full on takes a blow for him (”I could do that too.” ‘Yea, but you don’t’ “Shut up Shinji!”)

The truth comes out when Yosuke is about to leave for Inaba Minato/Makoto: Well, it’s been fun being fake boyfriends with you. Yosuke:  I guess we’ll just have to settle for just friends. Minato/Makoto: Maybe friends with benefits if we get bored and both single. Yosuke: Sure why not. Everyone: WAIT WHAT?! Minato/Makoto: Oh, did we forget to mention that?

They explain the whole situation and boy has Akihiko never felt more relieved. 

The moment Yosuke leaves Akihiko: Hey Minato/Makoto, you wanna get some beef bowls with me? Minato/Makoto: Is this a confession? Akihiko: Y-yes! Minato/Makoto: Thank fuck. 

Souji/Yu goes to pick up Yosuke from the train station. The moment Yosuke gets off, he gets a text from Minato/Makoto: ‘Man up and go get your man’ Souji/Yu: Get a text from your boyfriend? Yosuke: Ex-fake boyfriend if we’re being honest. Souji/Yu: Wait what?

By the time Yosuke’s done explaining everything they’re back at the Hanamura residence and they’re all alone. Souji/Yu: So it was all a lie? Yosuke: Yea, my parents just wouldn’t listen to reason. I do feel kinda bad for dragging hi-

Souji/Yu pulls him for a kiss, and Yosuke just pulls him closer.

They plan to have a double date the next day off

[obeysword]

personality traits / quirks

i’ve been thinking of this a lot bc unlike some of the other IT members, yu doesn’t really have nervous tells. which i guess makes sense when you’re a silent protag in a jrpg, but everyone should naturally have one or two. so i think when yu gets anxious & worked up, he clenches his fists. he will clench his teeth. grip at his clothes or his arms to steady himself & ground himself with reality. pain is a good way to offer focus or to feel the weight of something around you, like you’re clinging to a lifeline before tipping over the edge. they’re silent acts & not things that draw much focus or attention like scratching the back of your neck, looking away when flustered. when yu gets flustered, he’ll shake his head or even smile a little - depending on the type of attitude presented toward him. when he’s worked up, he can still keep his face mostly neutral & impassive, basically giving the impression that he’s fine & his words can remain steady. his eyes are often very clear or glazed when masking. sometimes he has slips, but prompted he’ll change the meaning of what he was implying & make you think, yeah you just misunderstood.

it is so hard to see through this guy. even when nanako was confirmed dead in the hospital, the only time he allowed himself to break & show how utterly upset he was about everything was when yosuke came back after the others walked away. he totally must have cried in nanako’s room with dojima, but when he exits out into the hallway it’s only the IT group that has tears in their eyes or running down their cheeks. narukami breaks down & cries on yosuke. asking him ‘did i make the right choice...letting namatame go like that?’ he’s a silent crier, clearly still trying to hold everything together when everything inside of him is beyond broken. the fact he only trusts yosuke to see him this way, clings onto him, really speaks volumes & parallels back to when yosuke cries on him in their confidant. & in good consciousness, i can’t see yosuke leaving narukami alone at the hospital while dojima was probably heavily sedated after trying to attempt murder on namatame also. narukami is not fine. dojima is not fine. the group comes back the next morning to check on him & go over the case again, they’ve all had a change of clothes except for narukami, which implies he didn’t go home or change.

he feels beyond empty inside. like all the light has been removed from his world, but then his light shows up again & assures him that it’s not over yet. yosuke is always shown to pull narukami out of the darkness, even when he’s dropping & falling in on himself after nanako’s death.

i still think he goes through spades where he can’t sleep well at night. he has to start stealing dojima’s booze just to sleep & still wakes up sweating from nightmares of adachi, namatame, or ame-no-sagiri. i don’t think narukami likes drinking & i really don’t think he acts like how he did in the animation where he takes on being an intense player sort of dude. but the fall out is bad for him. i think he has times where he doesn’t have an appetite & has to be encouraged to eat during this time too.

on another note with personality traits:

i think a lot of the beauty is destiny ending credits too. how oddly feminine narukami’s pose is during them? i’ve only really seen female characters / women taking this pose with their arms folded over their chests. men rarely ever are shown taking this pose.

& when the arcana shatters, the pose is still feminine & vulnerable in ways that you don’t see his character often being.

idk this is just a mental point i think about whenever i see the credits or listen to the song. his character is portrayed differently than many main protags in other animes, esp for the time-frame when the p4 series came out. i love this little touch because i think it shows how he’s someone who doesn’t have toxic masculinity in his nature. he’s rose above traditional norms set for japanese men & japan in general is very traditional culturally. you can see how naoto struggles to be accepted in a male driven society, & this is played again in p5 with sae telling makoto how challenging her job is due to the fact she’s a woman. kanji struggles to acknowledge his feminine side because people frown on how “girly” he acts. he’s not accepted by men or women & he feels there’s something wrong with him. narukami never felt there was something wrong with his friends. kanji’s knitting is cute! he should be proud to be so talented.

i can honestly say, narukami would make an ideal traditional housewife but he would be really bored with it too lol. but he is so comfortable with his manhood & sexuality unlike the characters who struggle to accept it. chie wishes she was as feminine as yukiko & gets embarrassed about her tomboy nature. kanji makes peace with his feminine side & realizes how wrong he was about what his dad meant. naoto is a harder one to place, because i think she still has struggles with defining which gender she identifies as & is more or less gender fluid / nonbinary - at least that’s how i see her, agree to disagree. & yosuke is shown to have a lot of toxic masculinity & struggles with accepting his sexuality to where he comes off as aggressively heterosexual to make up for the fact he’s interested in men.

narukami is so interesting because he’s always liked himself. he’s a person who genuinely likes himself for who he is & that is so refreshing to find. he has his flaws, but he accepts them & grows from them.

[dumbassdisaster]

Character asks, how about Kanji?

KANJI!!! :D I am once again putting the answers under a read more, I think I’m going to do that for all of these

do I like them:

I absolutely love Kanji!!!! He’s a sweetheart, a gay icon, and takes no shit!! I want him to have all the cute shit he wants and the happiness he deserves

5 good qualities:

speaks his mind, I love how he really doesn’t have a brain to mouth filter. makes him very honest

KIND. he is so, SO kind. his entire s. link consistently has me in tears, with how he’s willing to help out that kid even though he’s self-conscious about it. he’s also making gifts for his friends all the time!! the valentine’s present he brings for Yu…. Kanji, you amazing boy, keep being you

he’s a deep thinker!! even though he has a hard time communicating his thoughts, the conversations we’ve seen where he starts talking about philosophical stuff… they’re great. they don’t always make the most sense, but I get where he’s coming from!! and as he gets older, I know he’ll be able to communicate those ideas better, we believe in you Kanji <3

willing, ready, and EXCITED to kill gods. he also threatens adachi a lot, which is so iconic

extremely talented. his sewing skills are out of this world, and I hope he can open his own shop online and become rich and famous through his incredible craftsmanship

3 bad qualities:

falls asleep during team meetings when they’re discussing the murders. it’s not his fault, but those meetings are kind of important, Kanji skjdlfhskajdfh

uummmmm

nothing else he’s just good

favourite episode/etc: social link rank:

I really like his Rank 9, when he realizes that he misinterpreted what his dad said to him about being strong. there are people who accept him for himself, and being himself is all that really matters

otp:

there are a few pairings I really like for Kanji. Kanji / Naoto is the obvious one. I also really like Kanji / Yu, it is such a WHOLESOME ship

Also… Kanji / Naoki. they’re childhood friends! and Naoki is also a deep thinker, so I feel like they could have deep conversations and Naoki could help Kanji articulate his thoughts better….and Naoki would be so supportive of Kanji’s shop…. idk man, I just see potential there

brotp:

Kanji and Chie!!! even after Kanji decides to focus more on his softer side, I could see him wanting to spar with Chie by the river. and then they go back to Kanji’s house and Chie puts on a kung-fu movie while Kanji works on a project, and they just talk. They’re both kind of sentimental and sappy, and I think their friendship would reflect that

ot3:

Kanji / Yu / Naoto. I like Yu / Naoto, and I like Kanji / Naoto, AND I like Kanji / Yu. If they all like each other…then they should all date each other….

notp:

Kanji and any girl tbh

best quote:

OKAY OKAY I can’t think of the exact quote, BUT. When they’re having that cooking contest and he tastes Yukiko’s dish, and he’s just like. “It tastes…boneless? I don’t know, but it’s definitely not good.” The DELIVERY of the line paired with his thinking portrait… it’s fantastic, he is trying so hard to give the most honest and accurate description for Yukiko

ALSO (I’m doing another quote why not), the part during the group date café, when he’s like, “there are many different kinds of love…didn’t you say something like that, Yosuke-senpai?” Again, that’s not an exact quote. BUT. I love the implication that they had a conversation about kinds of love, and that Kanji remembers and thinks about it. the conversation itself should’ve been in the game, ATLUS. -_-

head canon:

Kanji absolutely made matching friendship charms for the IT. Everyone wears them whenever the entire group is back together, but Kanji always has his on his person at all times

also, he’s gay

[m0e-ru]

Persona 4 Golden Anime Episode 7 Analysis

Disclaimer: P4 Golden, P4A and P4GA spoilers. This is all my interpretation based on the games, the Golden and original anime series. Also A LOT of Adachi. And I got tired near the end whoops sorry.

*In comparison to the original anime series, it elaborates on Adachi’s desire to cover the whole world of fog. He is the representative of the human masses who do not desire the truth.

He will allow the world to be covered in fog and everyone turned into shadows. Everyone will live a world of their own making, and the world will no longer be “shit.”

But here in Golden, it focuses on Yu and Adachi and their bond, almost nothing about the decision to cover the world in fog. This is about the conflict within the two of them. Their relatedness to one another, as having almost the same persona, representing that they are two sides of the same coin.

Right after the opening, we see the IT discuss about the murder, as usual. All the evidence points to a certain someone, Adachi. But Yu, who has a bond with Adachi--a friendship, he thinks, leaves the diner. 

Cut to the Velvet Room where Marie feels Yu. She’s afraid that he might disappear into the fog of peaceful lies. That he himself might be willing to turn away from the truth. That his friend might be the bad guy, and would rather not accept it.

Margaret tells her this might be an effect of obtaining the Jester arcana, a representation of his bond with Adachi. She tells her that it is currently unstable, that Yu’s perception of this bond is also wavering. And depending on the choices he makes, it would either change, stay as it currently is.

Then cut to Adachi taking care of Dojima in the hospital. He soon leaves for Nanako's room. Yu has a call with his uncle, and the moment he says Adachi’s out to visit Nanako’s room, Yu panics and runs for the hospital. As if he’s worried that Adachi would do something to her.

He’s worried, realizing Adachi’s true nature--that he is the murderer. He thinks clearly, in the front of his mind, “This man is going to hurt my little cousin.” 

Nanako is okay, fortunately.

But his mindset about him before was “This man is my friend, we had a good time together /gestures to the social link/.” He even left the discussion about who the murderer is out of discomfort and doubt.

And now he is in conflict with himself. Does he think that this man is a good guy and a good friend? Or secretly a psychopath who started everything out of some crazy motive? He gets himself together and “believes” that this man is a good guy.

Yu confronts Adachi, hoping to knock some sense into him because he thinks this man is his friend. But Adachi plays around with Yu. He waits for him in the eerie bedroom. Not in Magatsu Inaba, but somewhere more accessible. And it's funny because he mocks Yu, “Haha I'm a bad guy and I want to see you and your friends confront me and try to defeat me.” But when Yu asks to talk to him, Adachi says “I don't have anything to say to you.” 

To the point he visits the TV world himself. He finds his way to the eerie bedroom himself.

He thinks that Adachi has already escaped into the TV world, which he did. He left the Dojimas behind, after having a snack with Dojima, and tucking Nanako into bed.

It makes sense in the game where he closed the portal to Magatsu Inaba and then appeared right behind Yu. 

But here, he waited, said his piece and then said he has “nothing to say” to this boy who feels betrayed by him. Adachi says Yu betrayed himself, believing in the lie 'Yu' made up himself and continuing to believe in it after he saw all that happened. 

Adachi holds a card, about to summon his persona, and it implies he has accepted the truth, himself. His eyes are still normal, but as he summons his persona, his eyes turn yellow, as if his shadow overwhelmed him and has taken over his ego. I'll explain more about this some other time when I'll re-watch p4g. 

He is now talking as his shadow, the side he hides from himself and everybody. But even like Futaba, Shadows and your Real Self aren't the same. 

“We have the same persona but mine's tainted bc of evil here's the world from my perspective blah blah blah” then Adachi tells Yu to go home, back to his friends. Yu still persists, until he falls to his knees, paralyzed in fear from a bullet that almost grazed the side of his head. 

The character the anime gave him is Someone who cares about people very much, but also is still very much afraid of pain and death. Not someone who is cool and still standing, even after he almost got shot.

Heck, this just says this was actual Adachi, not some hologram illusion whatever he made just to confront him from afar. The bullet wasn't an illusion (I mean, it also was pretty real in the game), his persona Actually clashed with his.

Yu could have actually punched him that very moment as compared to when Kanji tried to do it. But he didn't.

Then it cuts to the Velvet Room, where Margaret explains to Marie about Yu's current dilemma, the now warped looking Jester arcana card. As if the arcanas represented in each bond Yu makes is his own interpretation. He unconsciously assigns the arcanas to all the bonds he makes. 

The Jester is still unstable and is now distorting. Marie listens and watches the entire time, worried about her friend and this bond he made and is currently unsure about.

Yu comes back to the real world, where Yosuke's fully aware that Yu left on his own to the TV world to confront Adachi, hopefully, with a plan. Yosuke tells him to trust his friends and not make them worry, where he shows Marie who voluntarily left the Velvet Room out of worry. 

She tries to talk to Yu and tells him to explain his feelings. She's the type of friend who is very direct, and will push you around, intentional or not. It's just how she was brought up, she had to learn everything all over again. But having these kinds of friends are important. Those who really keep it real rather than sugar coating everything. If she can't understand something, she will ask for a clear explanation. This further rules out the possibility of implication and misinterpretation. And that's good. 

She brings Yu to the same hilltop he brought her to, then wonders why the view is so obscured, by fog nonetheless. But here, she cheers him up, a complete opposite to whatever happened with Adachi. She rebuts Yu's conflicts he muttered to her. Then, she gives him her comb. Ironically, not intended as a symbol of separation, but a strong bond. The promise to keep it, and to return it, to see each other again no matter what. 

Then the sun shines through the clouds, penetrating the fog. Symbolism that Yu's judgement has been cleared from the doubt and betrayal that clouded it. The rest of his team come over, saying they'll be by his side and that he 'shouldn't run off like that’ as if Yosuke snitched on him and told everybody and went into the TV world on his own.

Here, Marie re-states the words of Izanami, whether remembering unconsciously, or just something she heard and appeared on the top of her head. 'People see what they want to see, and believe only what they want to believe. But as the individual entity she is now, She says her own opinion, But you're not like that, [Yu]' And with strengthened resolve, Yu tells his team to pursue Adachi on the same day, while Marie stays on the hilltop.

Then it cuts to the Velvet Room, where the Jester turns into Hunger, as if Yu reevaluated his bond with Adachi and accepted it. It's no longer warped and he will see this bond through. 

The IT focus on clearing the shadows while they tell Yu to confront Adachi himself. Adachi is clearly amused as he toys around with the IT, playing his game he's having fun with. Yu says he rejects Adachi. The Adachi that betrayed him, mocked him, and hurt him. He knows that there is good in Adachi, that he is rejecting the one he is currently facing. 

Adachi battles Yu, mocked and disgusted by the bonds he made, represented by the personae he was able to make. Yu 'relies' on the power of bonds, something that Adachi thinks is humiliating and unneeded, all because he was so deprived of one for so long. He asks Yu what a 'bond' is, and he replies with, “to believe in the person at your side, in your friends.” Something he tried to do with Adachi at the eerie bedroom, and soon contradicted in this confrontation where he 'rejects' Adachi. 

Adachi's perception of 'belief' and 'bonds' is something negative, implying he himself hasn't gotten anything good out of it. It makes you selfish by 'believing' an ideal of how you want someone to be. Adachi is telling Yu that he shouldn't have made a bond with himself in the first place, he is clearly pushing him away. Now look where it got him, it got him hurt, and again, betrayed. He constantly calls him an idiot with this persistent mindset. 

Yu continues to reject Adachi and all that he says. He 'believes' that what he is doing--that making bonds--is a good thing, even a bond with Adachi. 

But Adachi still continues to fight Yu. He speaks sarcastically about his friends and his relationship with them. As if they’re not genuine. “You’ve seen each other’s ulgy sides, how pathetic you can be. But you're like ‘Oh, that's okay’ Pretending to be generous, smiling.” He calls it creepy and weird, another way of how Adachi views the concept of bonds.

He continues to elaborate his point by saying “As if you could actually like someone’s ugly side.”

“Trying so hard not to hurt others because you don’t want to get hurt yourself,” and he thinks this is pathetic. Yu retorts, saying that he and his friends have truly accepted themselves and one another, and will always get back up to look for the truth. Again, Adachi speaks back and this time calls it “whitewashing,” that it’s covering up more of the ugly truth. 

However he was brought up, it might have included being taught that he should not appreciate the ugly side of people. Once Yu realized Adachi’s true self, Adachi fled. He could have been scared that the Dojimas, the only people he believed trusted him, would also realize this. He is throwing everything away so that they won’t get hurt like Yu. Betrayed that he is not who he really is. Not some bumbling fool who ends up being a good drinking partner, or a kind adult who helps you with homework and eats dinner with you.

Adachi might be empty, but this side of him, and how this is elaborated with his new relationship with Yu, has made it been interpreted that he cares. He doesn’t want to continue hurting the people he cares about. He regrets this. 

Adachi is now really fed up. Tired of listening to this boy who is so much better than him, despite also being almost the same. He is constantly shown by seeing him with his friends, helping other people, being with the Dojimas, and now, he’s going head to head with him. Adachi just wants him to go, he doesn’t want to see his face. And is Yu decides to stay, Adachi will just have to defeat him, to get rid of him himself.

Their personas crash into the Dojima residence, which was clearly still intact, compared to everything in Magatsu Inaba. The comb falls out from Yu’s uniform. Now, they are tired from summoning their personas. Adachi's eyes are not yellow anymore. (But in the original, his eyes stayed yellow when uhh Izanagi legit stabbed M-Izanagi in the face then he disappeared aahaha)

Yu takes his chance to fight adachi, one on one as two people. Adachi brings out his gun, but gets knocked in the head and falls to the ground.

Yu goes HAM and takes it all out on Adachi. He takes out all his hate, anger and his feelings of betrayal.

Adachi, now weak, talks about his failure and self evaluation. Yu looks around and finds Adachi’s mug and sets it up with the rest. “You had one yourself,” saying that he is part of this family, that he is cared about. He calls him “Adachi-san” and asks him to come back to the real world with him. To settle down and atone for sins. But also in a gentle manner, with no malice or hate, like the emotionally deprived good friend and family member he is.

At that moment of weakness, the shadows merge with Adachi, bringing out Ame-no-Sagiri, the “ruler of fog” and the aspect of Izanami who watches humans from the heavens. Briefly cut to Marie, still on the foggy hilltop immediately feeling this presence.

Yu looks up and calls Adachi’s name, worried about what possesses him. Being blasted away, he hears Adachi’s voice, being sarcastic, but also as a form of encouragement to defeat Ame-no-Sagiri. We continue to see brief scenes of Marie on the hilltop, saying she is aware of what is currently happening the moment Ame-no-Sagiri awoke. Yu summons Magatsu-Izanagi as a separate persona, symbolizing the “maxed out” bond he has made with Adachi. And yelling “I'm taking you back,” means he wishes to save him, like all the dear friends who needed help. 

He slays Ame-no-Sagiri with this new, quite chaotic, persona and catches Adachi, continuing to keep him safe. 

Yu feels his chest pocket, as if he’s missing something, but quickly brushing it off, as if their memories have truly been taken away. Marie says her goodbye, while the IT thinks they’ve saved Inaba from the fog.

Now a final cut to Marie, where the fog that dispersed from Ame-no-Sagiri envelops the Inaba at an alarming rate. She hears an unknown voice that calls her to awaken, “Ame-no-Sagiri has been slain. The fog shall return to its rightful place,” which is Marie. Another flash of memories that comes with a sharp pain comes to Marie, her grave, as if the Hollow Forest was made long ago, to prepare her for this. She squats down in pain, finally remembering her duties as the one to absorb the fog.

With this memory and task she must fulfill by disappearing, she takes all her friends' memories with her and clears the fog. She wishes not to hurt them by telling them that she should die to save them, and instead takes every single memory about her from her friends. This way, they wouldn't have to care for a girl that they can’t even remember.

[shadowtarot]

Hidden Pain: A Persona 4 Drabble

Read this for context. 

Junes Food Court, mid-day, Sunday. The Investigation Team had called for a day of training before the next possible event could happen. But so far only Kanji, Yosuke, Teddie and Yu were at their normal meeting spot.

Yosuke drapes his arms onto the table as he sinks his face into them slowly. “What’s taking the girls so long? We only have a few hours until that huge sale hits, and when it does it’ll be near impossible for us to slip into the TV...”

“They’re getting medical supplies, man. Yu-senpai mentioned we were low.” Kanji closes his phone as he stashes it away in his pocket before glancing at his leader who’s using this downtime to fold a few origami cranes.

“I said I was going to grab them on my way here, but I had to help Nanako with something and ran out of time...” Yu states, not even glancing up from his work as he sets the crane down on the table.

“Well I know you can’t refuse anything when it comes to Nanako-chan, so I get it.” Yosuke nods. “Also how many of those do you plan to make?!”

“Sensei’s got some real skill with that!” Teddie states, his bright blue eyes watching closely as Yu begins another one.

“That just made wonder something, hey Kanji are you able to do origami as well?” Yosuke glances over at the younger teen.

“Why wouldn’t I? It’s easy enough once you figure it all out, but it’s not really my niche if you catch my drift.” Kanji shrugs. “It’s right up his alley though.”

“It’s relaxing...” Yu smiles a bit.

But as he’s beginning the first few folds, Yu suddenly jolts, enough for the paper in his hands to tear. 

“Yu?! Everything alright?” Yosuke gets up from his seat and walks to his best friend’s side.

Yu is wincing slightly, setting down the paper before looking up at his three friends. “Yeah, I think an old injury from the TV just popped up suddenly is all.”

“Really? Lemme know where it is when we get into the TV and I’ll heal it up for you. Could have sworn Yukiko took care of all the major ones last week....” Yosuke mutters.

“If Yosuke’s heals don’t do that much, I’ll help!” Teddie beats his chest once, smiling.

Yu chuckles, nodding. “Thanks you guys, but I think I’ll be fine. If it gets too bad, I’ll just heal myself.”

Yosuke focuses his gaze slightly before letting out a sigh. “If you say so...but don’t get too shocked if the girls start freaking out and try to heal you themselves.”

“heeeey! Sorry we’re late!” Chie calls out, waving her arm as she and the other girls walk up.

“Apolgies, but there was an issue with the cash register at the store where we normally get our medicine from.” Naoto explains, placing a hand in her pocket. “I hope we didn’t keep you four waiting too long.”

Rise starts counting the cranes Yu made before shrugging. “Seems he made twelve before we showed up. So they weren’t waiting that long.”

“Pffft, you can tell how bored they were by the amount of cranes? What if...we told time that way? ahahaha!” And there goes Yukiko on one of her laughing fits again.

“Geez, well if everyone’s ready we better hurry up and get in. Two more hours until the electronics sale starts. Plan to be in there for a few hours guys, we have to wait out the traffic.” Yosuke looks to everyone in the group.

“Let’s get going.” Yu puts all of his cranes away in a cloth bag before patting his hidden Katana with a small smirk.

Slipping through the currently average sized crowds, the group makes it to the TV they always use. Everyone puts their glasses on and slips into the TV World undetected.

Teddie slips into his bear suit, which he had left right at the hub area before looking at everyone present. “Alright! So who’s dungeon are gonna train in today Sensei?” 

“Well, I was actually thinking we might want to try tackling that Reaper you mentioned before. So it really doesn’t matter what area we go into right?”

“Are you serious Senpai?!” Rise stomps on her right foot hard on the ground. “You guys almost got killed by a Reaper back in Mitsuo’s! I’m not going to sit back and watch you guys actively hunt something that strong!”

“....it was a joke.” Yu rubs the back of his neck.

“Dude...your sense of humor needs some serious work.” Yosuke shakes his head. “Well if I could offer something, you guys know those Treasure Hands we keep running into? What if we went after those?”

“Oooh! We can make it a competition!” Chie raises her hand and bounces a bit as she speaks. “First one to kill ten of them gets...uhh...”

“First ten gets to have the others cook for them!” Yukiko smiles.

Yosuke and Yu wince. “H-How’s about first to ten gets to request something from the losers...that isn’t cooked.”

Yosuke nods. “What Yu said.”

Rise nods, writing that down. “If you all are each hunting ten then that’s going to be a lot of gold hands to hunt for.”

“They’re good money makers though, so no matter who wins we’ll all benefit in the end right?” Kanji crosses his arms. “Why don’t we do it in Yukiko-sempai’s Castle? It’s a small enough place that we won’t loose each other.”

“Sounds good, let’s move out guys!” Yu leads the way to the castle.

“Treasure hands spotted! Wow...for rare shadows there sure are a lot of them right now!”

“Let’s do this! I’m not passing up a chance for a request!” Yosuke smirks, dashing at a treasure hand.

“...for our sakes let’s hope Yu at least wins...” Chie sighs as she goes after one as well.

Everyone begins fighting the hand hoard, but Yu keeps switching Persona as he fights.

“Black Frost!” Ice shatters and destroys a treasure hand with retaliative ease. 

“That’s one for Senpai!”

“Perhaps we should bump the number up to twenty?” Naoto suggests. “Yu-senpai is having far too easy of a time right now.”

“Yeah, because he’s got more of an arsenal of Persona compared to us.” Kanji launches a treasure hand with a hard strike from his chair. “Just means we gotta work harder to keep up, yeah?”

“I’m with Kanji! No way I’m gonna lose to Sensei! KENTOKI-DOJI!”

Yosuke laughs. “Hell no, I’m not letting you take that one Ted! Jiryaya!” 

Both Persona charge at the one Treasure hand, closing in before...

“Konahana-Sakuya!” 

The hand bursts into flames as Yukiko cockily fans herself. “Oh I’m sorry, did you boys want that one?”

“One point for Yukiko-senpai!”

“ARGH! I’m not coming in last place here!” Yosuke goes after another one with increasecd speed, not wanting to be one upped again.

“If you’re getting serious then maybe I should too...Partner.” Yu adjusts his glasses. “IZANAGI!”

Yu runs right up beside Yosuke, using his Persona’s lightning to keep pace. The two smirk at eachother.

“This one’s mine, no doubt.” Yu gives Yosuke a small laugh as they rush at the shadow.

“Not if I have anything to say about it!” Yosuke has Jiryaya attack the shadow, and Izanagi does the exact same...but then...

Yu falls to the ground on one knee, coughing badly as Izanagi vanishes back into it’s tarot card. Everyone stops what they’re doing to look at their leader. 

“Yu?” Yosuke kneels down beside him. “Dude, you don’t look so hot...”

“I’m fine...really.” Yu starts to get up, but Kanji places a hand on his shoulder.

“Like hell you are. You had that sharp ass pain before the girl’s showed up and now you’re coughing this badly? Stop trying to act cool with this kinda shit going on, man!”

Rise does a scan on Yu, focusing intensely. Yu starts coughing again, this time blood coming up as he does so. 

“I can’t see any sort of spell on him...” Rise sighs, shaking her head.

“And my nose can’t sniff out anything abnormal either...” Teddie looks worried.

“Guys really, I’m okay...” Yu pushes Kanji’s hand away from his shoulder. “Let’s just go back to-”

“I’m sorry Senpai but I have to respectfully refuse.” Naoto states, arms folded. “It’s quite clear you’re not in the right condition to fight, despite your claims. Coughing up blood like you just did is not a sign of a healthy individual.”

“Yu...if something is going on, you know you can tell us right?” Chie pouts a bit as she speaks. “We’re your friends after all.”

“...I’d tell you...if I fully understood it myself...” Yu mutters a bit. “I’m going to hang around here a bit longer before heading back. That sale is still going on, so leaving now wouldn’t be wise anyway.”

Yosuke sighs, nodding. “Yu has a point. Well...we’ll all hang out around the hub. Ted’ll get you once the coast is clear.” 

The others walk off, giving Yu some space. He holds his chest tight, as blue static seems to shock him before subsiding. 

“It’s gotten worse...as he’s gotten stronger. I don’t know...how much longer I can hold out like this...but if I try to do what they did...will they even..NGH!” The static starts up again, but Yu sinks his katana into the ground as he closes his eyes...and the surge comes to a halt. “No...I refuse to lose the one thing tying me with them...not now...not ever.”

Yosuke watches from a safe distance away, seeing just how much pain his best friend is in. He may not fully understand what’s going on but...

“Maybe he’s just as scared of accepting a part of himself....like me.” Yosuke shakes his head. “I’ll stay by your side as long as I can. And maybe one day...we can all help you face yourself...like you have for us.”

[soprone]

Some notes on my characterisation of Teddie

retreading some old ground from previous blogs but hopefully it’s better than before because i’m always getting better grasps on my muses as time goes on so pwease read with an open mind  .✫*ﾟ･ﾟ

So while my characterisation is mostly based on the english localisation of the games and anime because that’s what i’m most familiar with, i feel like teddie comes across differently than may have been intended due to dub changes. i kind of viewed him the way i do when i first played, learning about the dub changes mostly just confirmed some things about my interpretation. like of course i changed my mind about some things but so you know where I’m coming from

So something that didn’t translate very well was Teddie’s humor. He’s constantly making bad jokes that the rest of the Investigation Team doesn’t respond to. This isn’t because they’re uncomfortable with his jokes, even when they’re a bit perverted. He’s not a jerk who keeps making bad jokes that make people uncomfortable, and the Investigation Team aren’t jerks for not explaining to Teddie that it’s not okay or anything, since he’s new to human customs. It’s because he’s looking to bring others into his comedy routine with any kind of reaction, positive or negative, and the only way to discourage him is to not respond. When someone makes a bad pun, groaning and complaining about it is part of the humor they’re going for. It’s like that.

The reason this was translated poorly is because Teddie was specifically mimicking a Japanese comedy style. I kinda always saw it as dad jokes kind of humor, but learning about the original intentions made it click.

This isn’t to say Teddie never does anything perverted. Almost, honestly maybe every, Persona male acts like a pervert, contrives scenarios to provide fanservice to the player/viewer, sexually harrasses female characters for comedy or just because the writers think it’s normal. What I’m saying is, this isn’t a Teddie problem. It’s a Persona problem. I’m not excusing his actions but I don’t think he should be held to a different standard than other characters who do the exact same things. I also really hate when people call Chie (and/or the other girls) an abuser because she physically hurts the boys, because again that’s not a Chie (or other girl) problem, it’s a Persona problem with how the comedy tries to be this slapstick thing on occasion. Like I hope where I’m coming from makes sense when I say that?? No I’m not say it’s okay for Teddie to try to grope Rise, or for Chie to kick Yosuke, and similar moments. I’m acknowledging that these moments are part of the game’s humor, they’re anime characters engaging in anime nonsense in an 11 year old game. It’s bad faith criticism to judge a single piece of media or a single character by ignoring the tone of the work they’re in, holding them to the standards of the real world and also ignoring the same problems exist within similar works (for example w/ persona 4 you need to consider it within the context of other anime, other video games, all forms of media that may have directly influenced it, the state of the world (politically & pop culture wise) at the time (2008), etc., persona 4 does not exist in a vaccumn) and that exist in other characters within the same work. It’s not helpful in explaining why their behaviour and/or why making light of it/normalising it can be harmful because you aren’t examining why it’s written the way it is. Oof this bullet point got long sorry

Teddie’s character arc is not linear. He doesn’t consistently get better, and he is in fact at his most obnoxious in my opinion during the Yasogami High Culture Festival. Since his arc is about maturity, this is like his ‘rebellious stage’ where he’s a brat before growing up more, after having grown up a lot in the months before the festival. However, I can’t accept his characterisation in Persona Q. He’s pushed too far and ‘flanderized’ ike a lot of the Persona characters are in spinoffs. I adore his group date marriage event (&accept him believing he fell for the protag at first sight as a headcanon (it’s just a crush, not ‘true love’/’destiny’, though)), think the love potion quest where he downs some love potion believing it will make girls love him only to fall for Akihiko is hilarious, but that’s about it. I haven’t finished Persona Q2, but his characterization in that game is a lot better from what I’ve seen.

I believe that Teddie went through the events of Persona 4 believing that when the investigation was over, he was ‘supposed’ to go live in the midnight channel permenantly and say goodbye to his friends. A lot of his antics during the year are him pushing for some cliche high school fun experiences in order to make some memories to hold onto (he’s kind of like a player avatar in that way ?? this kind of thing is why the latest 3 Persona games are set during high school over just one year, right??). His perverted antics can be explained with the idea that he doesn’t actually expect any of these girls to fall in love with him, if he wants anything he wants a movie-style ‘summer romance’ so he doesn’t really take them / flirting with them seriously (I’m not justifying it, only providing a possible explanation). He may have just gotten lonely and came back to visit anyway, but his intention really was to leave the human world for good at the end of the game. It’s only when the IT laugh off the suggestion that he realises he was the only one who believed this, that they really think of him as part of the team and weren’t just humoring him this whole time. 

I headcanon that his perception of his friends changes and he starts to respect them (+Yosuke’s wallet) better over time after this. It’s gradual (old habits die hard!) but noticable if you pay attention. Naoto notices his maturing during the game, she’d probably be the first to catch on.

He’s bisexual and nonbinary. Though, his feelings on gender maybe can’t be compared to a normal human, he takes on an androgynous male body because he wants to be loved rather than because he feels like a man, dresses as a girl because again he wants to feel pretty and loved rather than because he feels like a woman... In Persona Q2 he volunteers himself and Chie for the power team despite struggling to lift the weights that team needs to, because Chie is insecure about being the only girl on the team and he wants to comfort her. So he’s not exactly bigender or gender fluid, he’s nonbinary and presents whichever way feels right at the time, and what feels right is based less on his own feelings and more what will hopefully make him loved or sometimes help/comfort his friends? He did not grow up like a human in a society of binary gender, it honestly doesn’t mean much to him.

He believes Kanji is attracted to him (which I see as untrue aha I sort of ship it but if he’s got a crush it’s not in the way Teddie thinks), &mimics Yosuke’s attitude about it, not seriously scared of him being predatory or anything (not realising the problem w/ Yosuke’s homophobic comments, which Yosuke quietly gets over later &is probably embarrassed about his own behaviour so he’s not gonna explain), just thinking it’s a funny way of teasing him, seeing Kanji denying him (or not knowing what the fuck Tedd’s talking about) as being tsundere. I feel like this would die down as he gets older

His one-sided rivalry with Akihiko in the Q games (ahh I know they have a hostile relationship in the Arena games but I haven’t played them so don’t know if I wanna make that canon to my Tedd, it seems like they’re too hostile) is because Akihiko is hot, has lots of fangirls, but it’s not just jealousy, he’s swooning too

I think he flirts with Goro in PQ2 because he’s told Goro is a detective prince like Naoto, it’s kinda similar to Akihiko, he follows the crowd and fangirls too. But also, Goro is a Wildcard, he doesn’t know it at this point but he may subconsciously sense it? I’ve always headcanoned him having an attraction to Wildcards, of course the P4 protag is his #1 but he’s pretty flirty with the others in the Q games

that’s it for now because this has gotten SO long, if you made it this far I love you. if you didn’t i still love you because i love humanity as a whole but i’m a little disappointed because i crave attention not gonna lie.

[sillyfudgemonkeys]

Why does junpei seem to be everyone's least favorite bro character?

Considering he’s my least fav too, I think I might have some insight

So like I have a feeling people who either think he's great or not could be sourced back to whether they played the male or female route first. I can see people hating him more if they played the male one first (tho I've seen people still like him despite only playing the male side.....for...some...reason that I can’t explain cause I don’t personally see it).

Under the cut cause ehhhhh it’s a little long

Basically how I'd rate the bros, only in relation to their MCs is (as for in relation to other characters it's a bit different but I'd still rank Yosuke/Ryuji over either Junpei but that's a separate thing and we're just focusing on the bro aspect):Yosuke/Ryuji>>FeMC!Junpei>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>*I don't think he can exist on this rating scale cause he doesn't deserve to be considered a bro tbh*>>>>>>MaleMC!Junpei.

The thing is....Junpei is a HORRIBLE bro to Minato, he's not even his bro tbh. Like as a character, he's fine it's a decent arc (I say decent cause he's still a wishy washy person even in the Answer and no you can't argue against that people just overlook which doesn't mean he's still not wishy washy). As a person, esp in relation to Minato? He's a prick. I get it you are jealous dude, but holy crap Minato literally did nothing wrong. It doesn't help that they really botch their "friendship," it's a cycle of blaming Minato and then apologizing with the promise not to do it again BUT THEN DOES IT AGAIN! I'm honestly flabbergasted that Minato even accepted his final apology, and the fact Junpei even considered each other friends despite never hanging out. It's one of the most poorly written things in P3 (the manga/anime HELP  it out more thank god, but it's not 100% fixed and it's not the game).

FeMC.....it's a lot better, you can totally understand their friendship, I mean in this case there's a new slew of problems that Minato didn't have (like "wait we're friends but you're treating me like crap?" rather than "he just treats me like crap the entire time and then at the end I guess we end up as friends"). But at the same time I can understand why the FeMC forgives him, and I think they handled his hidden misogyny to not being misogynistic of having a female leader a lot better. I mean he still has issues, such as willingling peeping on the girls at Kyoto even tho his best friend is a girl and he might accidentally peep on her too. So his willingness to hurt his bro kinda docks him some points there, but he's still up there thanks to being willing to do anything for her like Yosuke/Ryuji are for their MCs.

Speaking of Yosuke/Ryuji, those two have shown to have their MCs backs, might get them into some trouble too but it's all in good faith.

Now I can understand why people might like Junpei more, they might like how he doesn't "kiss the MCs ass" which I understand (not that I think Yosuke/Ryuji kiss their MCs' ass tbh, and like he does like the FeMC so there's that). But....he's still not a bro (at least for Minato, FeMC he is tho), he does everything that a bro shouldn't do and then is somehow granted "friend/bro" at the end of the game? Foundation for the "guy who doesn't like MC cause he's jealous but becomes his friend later" is good , execution not so much.

So yeah it could be either because, 1) They don't think he should be classified as a bro character (esp if you ignore the FeMC side) and is just a "first boy" character, 2) They just don't like him as a character/person, regardless of him being a "bro" or "first boy"

I'm both tbh. And again this isn't looking at how they interact with the rest of their teammates. That's for a whole other debate. I personally put it as Yosuke>Ryuji>>>Both Junpeis. Like Yosuke is good to his teammates and you can see how they do respect him in a way in PQ (he can be pretty self sacrificing and does try to help them out when and where he can and treats Kanji and Teddie like a big bro after getting to know them), the worse he does is push people's buttons or the 2nd hot spring scene in P4G esp since that didn't fit P4's "retaliation/comeuppance formula." Ryuji is also self sacrificing but I don't like how he treats the girls in his perverted fashion and he also does put the team at risk (I mean they ALL, and I do mean ALL put the team at risk cause...they just suck at sneaking around, but his can be easily avoidable), and while Mona rags on him outta nowhere, Ryuji started doing it too and then he never really apologized either and that was just a mess (like I don't like Mona either but when Ryuji started his useless jabs it kinda came outta nowhere and it was weird). Junpei however DOES put his team at risk, with him being caught and letting himself leak info to the enemy (esp when he knows there's an enemy out there >.>), also just running ahead for the Priestess boss battle he just....really....puts the team at risk at the worst moments (like Ryuji's are played for comedy I think and it's just his big mouth, Junpei's actions really could fudge people over tho), also his perving scene and I dunno at least Yosuke/Ryuji seem to have SOME boundaries, Junpei doesn't feel like he does.

Again, that’s just me for the “bros” in relation to the other characters, I do know people can have some very differing opinions, esp for the Yosuke vs Ryuji portion. I kinda also went with Yosuke over Ryu cause...Yosuke is more consistent character-wise, while Ryuji is a bit all over the place (Dungeon 1 and CoOp Ryuji are tied with Yosuke but sadly main story Ryuji is.....not which is a shame)

[zee-isaiah-pugnacious7-blog]

Campout (AU)

[The following is a revised scene of the Camping Trip. Expect mild fluff.]

It fell quiet in the tent an hour after Kanji joined them.

Yu didn’t mind. He had been spending time with the rebel a couple days after he joined the Investigation Team. He started out aggressive at first, but by the second time he decided it was time to make a change for the better and leave behind his ‘trouble maker’ reputation.

Since then, the leader started to like his company, and welcomed him in sharing his and Yosuke’s tent--- it was actually perfect, considering two of their guys didn’t make the trip… as if the night had plans for the boys.

Plans that, with Yu’s interference, took a different turn.

It was a gut feeling he developed. After the trio had shared their own rants about the dreaded King Moron (and devoured Kanji’s animal crackers, no penguin to be found), silence came over them; tired from a day of picking up trash and suffering food poisoning of the Nth-degree, there was no way Yu and Yosuke could stay up any longer.

At least, so he figured.

“Hey, Kanji, do you have any more room over there?” Yosuke asked, his tone a bit… tense.

He’s going to say something. Yu thought.

“Barely. If I move any further, I’ll be lying on a rock!” Kanji responded. “Why don’t you move over?”

“If I move any further, I’ll roll downhill!” Yosuke responded. (Yu then wondered how they ended up pitching the tent in such a horrible spot). “You sure you can’t scoot over?”

He’s going to say something… Yu knew.

“Why do you want so much room, anyhow?” Kanji scoffed.

“Uh, no reason…” Yosuke replied.

Better shut him up. Yu figured, then scooted closer to the rebel. “There. Is that plenty of room, Mr. Claustrophobic?” he quipped.

His friend blinked, while Kanji arched an eyebrow. “I-I’m not claustrophobic!” Yosuke countered. “I just… this tent is small, y’know? And the ground sucks,”

“You picked the spot,”

“Because it was the only spot left!”

“Lets just get to sleep…” Kanji groaned. “My group bailed on me, so I was stuck with the work.”

Yu looked at him, astonished. “You did all the work yourself? W-What were they doing?”

Kanji sneered. “Probably hiding in the tent until dinner… Bastards didn’t even save me any food by the time I arrived.”

“…Ouch. Talk about a dick-move.” Yosuke muttered, then added quietly, “(…at least you weren’t poisoned.)”

“Whatever. I didn’t expect anyone to eat with me anyway--- that’s why I brought my own snacks,”

Yu felt his stomach clench (and not because of Mystery Food X); to know he and Yosuke shared the only minimal food the rebel had brought for himself left him feeling a bit guilty.

“I see.” Yosuke replied, twiddling his thumbs.

He’s going to say something. Yu realized once again. Hanging out with Yosuke for so long, he knew when his best friend was going to speak his mind--- often leading to trouble.

And he knew that, whatever it was, it would piss off Kanji.

“So… Kanji,” Yosuke began.

Shit, here we go. Yu rubbed his face.

“We’re… ‘safe’ in here with you, right?”

Kanji gave him a look. “What do you mean by that?”

“I mean, given the fact that you’re---“

*WHUMP!*

Before Yosuke could utter another word, Yu hit him in the face with a pillow. “(Shut it!)” the leader hissed.

Kanji sat up, a glare in his eye. “What was that, Yosuke-senpai?” he groused.

“…I’ll tell you after my concussion clears up…” Yosuke groaned.

“It’s nothing, Kanji. Don’t listen to him,” Yu sighed.

“No, I want to hear what he has to say!” Kanji reached over and yanked the pillow off Yosuke’s face. “Go on, senpai, spill it!”

Yosuke flinched. “Well, d-don’t take this the wrong way, but… well, after seeing your Shadow---“

Shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up…! Yu repeated in his head, his eyebrow twitching.

“…I figured… you might… be… gay? I-I mean if you are, that’s fine, but since we’re in a tent I just wondered---“ Yosuke was rambling now.

“Seriously?!” Kanji fumed. “You don’t trust me in the same tent because of that?! You think I’m going to…?! That I’d even consider…?! What the hell, senpai?!”

“Well, sorry! But the way your Shadow was acting, it makes me nervous---!”

“You obviously missed the symbolism, idiot.” Yu spoke up, sitting up between the two.

“W-What…?”

Yu gave him a hard glance. “Think about what Kanji had told us on the rooftop--- he enjoys sewing. But because people find it feminine, he had to keep it to himself; if people learned the truth, they would call him gay solely because they think it’s not ‘manly’. …That’s what his Shadow symbolized--- in truth, he just wanted to be accepted. Think about Yukiko’s Shadow--- it was a princess. Because everyone kept talking about how she was the heir to the Amagi Inn, that’s how they made her feel. And think about yours and Chie’s Shadows--- yours was a total jerk and Chie’s was a bitch, based on how you both felt about your own situations.”

Yosuke rubbed the back of his neck. “…O-Okay, you’ve got a point there…”

“Then why do I feel like I have to prove my sexuality to you?” Kanji sneered. “Should I go hit the girl’s tent now?!”

Yu shook his head. “That’s overcompensation,”

The rebel gave him a confused look. “What?”

“…Trying too hard. Plus it would only make you look like a perverted creep--- like Yosuke.”

“Hey…” Yosuke whined.

“I dunno… apparently it’s not ‘safe’ to share a tent with me,” Kanji muttered, bitterness all over his face.

Yu scooted closer, patting him on the back. “I feel safe with you.”

“(S-Seriously?)” Yosuke whispered, taken-aback by his leader’s actions.

Yu have him another heated glare. “If you don’t feel comfortable, Yosuke, you’re welcome to sleep elsewhere.”

“W-What?! No fair, I had to set up this tent…!”

“So did I. But you’re the only one having a fit about our sleeping arrangements--- ergo, sleep somewhere else.”

“But---!”

“Out.”

Yosuke grimaced. “…tch, whatever. This spot sucks anyway,” he then smirked. “Maybe I’ll use Kanji’s idea and sleep in the girl’s tent, hee hee.”

Kanji rolled his eyes. “Yeah. Good luck with that, Major Pervert,” he said, Yu giving a mock-salute afterward.

Yosuke sneered, but smirked. “Good luck--- try not to turn this campout into Brokeback Mountain!” with that he dashed out.

However his reference was wasted, as the rebel only arched an eyebrow. “Brokeback what?”

“Never mind.” Yu chuckled, turning out the lantern and lying down. “I give it five minutes before he comes back with a black eye.”

“I give it less,” Kanji lied back, staring at the top of the tent. “…y’know, you didn’t have to stick up for me.”

“I wanted to. …Besides, Yosuke needs to learn to keep his mouth shut about certain subjects,”

The rebel turned on his side, looking at his senpai. “Why did you get so defensive about it? As close as you and Yosuke-senpai are, I figured you’d joke around with him.”

Yu shrugged, keeping his poker-face. “I knew you’d get upset about it.”

“You sayin’ I’m sensitive?!”

“I know I would be…”

Kanji arched an eyebrow. “Huh? W-Why would you be sensitive about it?”

The leader sighed; he had to choose his words carefully. “I just would be. Getting picked on for something like that… it really hurts. Don’t think that I never had problems with other people’s comments, before.”

“Tch. Don’t try to give me sympathy… You’ve got girls like Chie and Yukiko-senpai hanging out with ya! And Teddie keeps calling you ‘Sensei’. I hear you’re good on the basketball team, too, and hear a buncha kids talking about you--- good things, too.” He frowned, looking back at the top of the tent. “No one goes quiet when you enter a room, or takes off running when they see you coming down the hall…”

Yu sighed. “Yeah, well… it’s only because I’m from the city, and everyone thinks I’m a hot-shot. Honestly, I’m just doing my best in school, and help people out with favors.”

“Yeah, but people trust you! And why shouldn’t they? You didn’t give yourself a bad reputation…”

“No… I got the ‘cool’ reputation--- and it’s a pain in the ass.”

“How?! People love you!”

“Because they think I’m cool!” Yu clenched his fist. “At first I figured it was just because I was the new kid. But no--- somehow people take one look at me and think, ‘Hey, if I hang out with this guy, I might be cool too!’ ...It was like that in the city, too. I think you guys are my only real friends, just because you like hanging out with me as a friend, not to ride my coattails,”

“Well, yeah. Of course we like hanging out with ya--- hell, you’re the only friend I’ve ever made! No one else ever had the guts to just walk up and talk to me,”

“No one else hung out with me just for the sake of hanging out,”

“Still… at least they hung out with ya,” Kanji sighed, shutting his eyes. Yu could tell he was trying his best to keep a cool head, to forget about all the comments Yosuke made--- and then some.

The leader could sympathize, but in more ways than one. True, he was the most popular kid at his old school, and had gained quite a bit of popularity since attending Yasogami High… but there was a secret he himself had.

He felt alone.

His parents worked nonstop--- not because they needed the money, they just put their jobs first. The 16-year-old couldn’t remember the last time they spent time together. He thought of those nights where he had dinner alone, all the birthdays were the most he got was a card with a half-assed signature on it, all the sporting events and ceremonies his parents missed…

Now their work took them overseas. Why bother sending him to stay with relatives? He was used to being home by himself.

Sure, he could invite his ‘friends’ over, but once they had to go home, it felt as if no one ever entered his doorway. None of them left behind a memorable moment like his new friends did--- all they wanted was to check out his stuff, ask him about parties, watch a movie then leave. No one told him about their problems, asked him for advice, confided in him…

To everyone, he was just a ‘cool kid’.

To his parents… he was more like some pet that went to school.

When he first came to Inaba, he was worried it would be the same cycle… Kids would just see him as a hot-shot, no one would be home, and he’d feel like an empty shell.

Thank God things were different.

“Senpai…” Kanji whispered, breaking him from his thoughts for a moment. “Do you really feel safe with me? …Not because of what Yosuke-senpai said, but… from what I’ve done in the past?”

Yu didn’t have to think too much. The rebel had a bad reputation--- taking on biker gangs, threatening to beat up the team the first day they met… hell, the guy punched his own Shadow’s lights out!

But deep down… there was more to him than his tough-guy image. Yu wanted to keep hanging out with him to see what all he kept hidden in his heart.

Like how he wished someone would hang out with him just to learn more about him…to see if they found their time together worthwhile.

It often scared him. If something happened to him, would any of them have cared? Probably not. His parents wouldn’t notice until weeks later, and his old classmates would just turn to the next ‘cool kid’.

At least the team cared. And he cared about the team.

Kanji included.

“Of course I feel safe,” Yu replied, moving closer and resting a hand on the rebel’s shoulder. “We’re always watching each other’s backs, remember? I know who to put my trust in,”

Kanji looked at him, taken off-guard. “S-Seriously?” sputtered; he crossed his arms, clearing his throat. “Y-You’re just saying that cuz I’m helping you guys catch the killer,”

“And because we’re friends,”

“Yeah?” Kanji turned on his side, looking his leader in the eye. “So if the cops suddenly come up to me, accusing me of causing trouble, you won’t deny we ever hung out in case they pin you as a troublemaker too?”

Yu sat up on his side; their faces were close. “If anyone accuses you of anything, I’ll be there to stand up for you, even if it gets me in trouble.”

Kanji looked at him, sighing. “You say that now, but you’d probably back down…”

“Don’t be stupid--- I didn’t back down when we had to fight your Shadow and save you. I didn’t turn and leave when that cop came into Aiya’s and started making comments. And I kicked Yosuke out of the tent when he wouldn’t keep his mouth shut. …I told you--- as long as you’ve got my back, I’ve got yours, no matter what anyone says.”

“Not even if your uncle got involved? He’s a detective, right?”

Yu scoffed. “He questions me about anything… Nanako often interferes so we don’t fight. Once I convince him you’re turning a new leaf, he’d cool off--- maybe still be suspicious of both of us, but I guess it’s part of being a parent.” He grinned. “Nanako would probably want you to make her something,”

Kanji blushed. “D-Don’t go around telling anyone! It’s bad enough someone saw my Shadow on the Midnight Channel. If you guys talk about my hobby, I’ll pound ya into the concrete!”

“I won’t.”

“Good.” The rebel turned on his back, letting out a heavy breath. “…Sorry. This whole trip’s been a pain in the ass,”

“At least it’s almost over---“

There came footsteps and loud groaning from outside the tent. “Hey…! Are you frickin’ kids asleep in there?! Anyone out past *urp* curfew gets suspended!” came the unmistakable threats of the teacher, Morooka--- aka, King Moron. It was clear he hit the booze a little too hard tonight.

“We’re asleep,” Yu responded, in a somewhat sarcastic tone.

“No you’re not! Get to sleep or you’re on my Shit List! (uugggh I drank too much booze…)”

The two stayed still, waiting until the obnoxious teacher stumbled off. “Senpai… Yosuke’s still out there!” Kanji said, a bit concerned.

Yu shook his head. “King Moron’s drunk off his ass. Yosuke could hide behind a tree and manage to avoid him,” he looked at his watch. “He should be on his way back by now. I wonder what’s taking him?”

Kanji stretched, letting out a yawn. “Maybe Chie knocked his lights out or something,” he looked at his senpai. “…Same thing probably would’ve happened to me--- I was so pissed I didn’t think twice about her deadly heels. Thanks for stopping me,”

Yu once again gave a shrug. “Like I said, it would be overcompen--- er, trying too hard. As long as you’re comfortable, I’m comfortable.”

“Alright, if you say so…” His face was still a bit red, and his position remained tense; he was still forcing himself to relax.

Yu moved back. “Here, scoot near the middle,”

“What? Why?”

“The ground isn’t too bad here. This way you’ll have less chance of rolling onto that rock,”

“Oh, uh, thanks… but what about you? Any further and you might roll downhill,”

“I don’t move much in my sleep, I’ll be fine.”

“Still… I can move back over, it’s no problem,”

Yu sighed. “How about we share the middle?”

Kanji’s eyes widened. “Are you nuts?! W-What if Yosuke comes back…?!”

“Then he can join us.”

“SENPAI!” The rebel’s face was completely red now.

“Kanji. We’re just. Going. To sleep. There’s no reason to feel embarrassed--- and if Yosuke wants to make comments, let him… you can just kick his ass later--- I’ll help.”

Kanji had his face covered in a face-palm. He mumbled something under his breath. “…If it were anyone else… Alright, senpai. If you’re okay with it,”

The leader gave a nod, then closed his eyes. The rebel let out another breath, relaxing and doing the same.

A few minutes passed before the two drifted to sleep.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Since he left the tent, Yosuke had been in stealth-mode. The entire campsite had fallen quiet since the sun had gone down, save for a few students sharing gossip.

“Did you watch the Midnight Channel the other night?” one student was whispering to another. “That show was BEYOND weird!”

“I know right? …I liked the last one with that princess.” His tent-mate responded.

“…I almost had a heart attack,” a boy was saying in a first-year tent. “I was like, ‘There is no way in hell Kanji Tatsumi is my soul-mate!’”

“How about that weird show he was on? I didn’t know whether to laugh or throw up!” another boy replied. “…Hey, Naoki, you used to hang out with him when you were kids, right?”

“Yeah, but that was years ago.” Naoki replied. “Besides, I don’t think you should be talking about him behind his back. He looked pretty pissed at you guys when he left,”

“Where do you think he went?” the first boy asked.

“I dunno, but if he doesn’t get back soon, he’s gonna get expelled--- King Moron likes to lurk around, y’know.”

“Oh well. It’s his funeral,” the second boy responded.

“…talk about a freak,” a girl was stating in a third-year tent. “And I thought he was scary enough in person!”

“But why would he show up on TV like that? You think he’s someone’s soul-mate?” another girl asked.

“Ugh, who would want to date… that?” a third girl sneered. “In any case, the Midnight Channel sure has been showing weird stuff. I wonder who’ll appear on next?”

Hopefully no one, Yosuke thought. So far the investigation was proving difficult--- every time they had a lead, the next victim would end up throwing them off-track.

He paused in his tracks, hearing a horrible sound…

“SNOOOOORRRRRKKKLLLLTH… ZZZZZZZHHHHHOOONNNKK…”

“The hell is that…?!” Yosuke whispered to himself, finding it was coming from a second-year tent…

Right at this moment, Chie and Yukiko were coming out. “…no way I’m sleeping with that!” Chie was muttering; she gave a yelp when she noticed someone outside their tent. “Augh!”

“Shh! Shh! It’s just me!” Yosuke stammered, shielding himself.

“Yosuke?! What are you doing outside our tent?!” Yukiko demanded in a hushed tone.

“I was just, uh, taking a walk. I was having trouble sleeping, so I figured the fresh-air would help. …What about you guys? Why are you doing, sneaking out?”

“Ugh, can you not HEAR that?!” Chie sneered, pointing to the tent just as another symphony of snores rang out. “We couldn’t sleep with all that racket!”

“We were going to see if someone else would let us bunk with them,” Yukiko said.

“Why don’t you come to my tent? Our guys cut out, and we’ve got Kanji staying with us already…” Yosuke began to persuade.

Chie glared. “Nice try, Horny-mura. There is no way I’m sharing a tent with you,”

Yosuke sighed. “It was worth a shot…”

Yukiko looked up at the starry skies; thankfully the weather was clear for their trip. “We should find somewhere to sleep; it’s already getting late. I heard Morooka patrols the campsite at night,” she whispered.

“Oh shit… I forgot King Moron’s obsessed with busting anyone on school trips,”

“W-Well, lets hurry up and get back to your tent; if he catches you around ours, he’ll call you out for being a pervert.” Chie stated.

“Me?! What if he catches you two walking with me back to my tent?!”

Yukiko shushed them both. “Let’s just be careful; your tent isn’t far from ours, right? We can get there, then Chie and I can slip into someone else’s tent.”  She suggested. Another loud snore came from their tent. “…preferably, the farthest one from ours.”

The trio began walking. As they snuck through the campsite, they heard a couple more students gossiping. “You think the killer will strike again?” a first-year girl was asking. “I mean, it’s been a while, but… you think he’s still in Inaba?”

“I hope not… C-C’mon, lets get some sleep. No more talking about murders,” her tent-mate replied, timid.

“…You think the killer did skip town?” Chie asked in a hushed voice as they walked behind some tents. “We’ve thwarted him twice now.”

“So he might be in another town, throwing people into the TV?” Yukiko wondered. “…but… wait, would this even work in other towns?”

“…I don’t know. But, it sure seems weird--- the Midnight Channel rumors didn’t start until that reporter, Miss Yamano, appeared on television.” Yosuke replied.

“Oh, yeah--- someone was making a fuss about it, saying she was his soul-mate!” Chie remembered. “It does seem to fit… The Midnight Channel is an urban-legend that only exists in Inaba--- er, right?”

Yosuke shook his head, sighing. “I hope it’s just Inaba… If it turns out someone got thrown in from another city or country, we’re going to have a hell of a time tracking them down in the TV World,”

“Heeeyyy… are there a buncha low-lives over there?!” came a drunken slur, ten feet away.

“Oh, crap--- King Moron’s coming this way!” Chie gasped.

“Q-Quick, hide!” Yukiko urged.

The threesome hurried around some trees; Yosuke ushered them to climb up one, each of them clinging onto a sturdy branch, just as the drunken teacher came lumbering over, waving around a flashlight. “Where are ya?! I know someone’s over here…!” he hollered.

Yosuke flinched, hiking his leg higher as the flashlight’s beam aimed his way, avoiding getting caught in the light.

“Morooka!” came a teacher’s shout in the distance. “Get back to your tent--- it’s almost midnight!”

“And let these hooligans run ‘round…? *urp* probably heading into each other’s tents to cozy up with someone… Ya want to deal with a buncha pregnant teenagers?!” Morooka slurred back.

“Ugh, you’ve been drinking too much. Go get some sleep--- you’re going to wake up the whole camp!”

“Fine… but whatever happens didn’t happen on MY clock, buster…!”

Everyone kept quiet until they were sure the teachers were gone, then climbed down the tree. “Whew! That was too close…” Chie sighed with relief.

Yukiko looked around at the rest of the tents; they all had fallen silent. “I think everyone’s sleeping now. It’s so quiet,” she said. She paused, still hearing snoring in the distance. “…save for our tent. If we sneak into someone’s tent now, they would probably freak out.”

“My offer’s still on the table,” Yosuke said with a wink.

“Ugh, get over it…” Chie sneered; she heard the snoring in the distance. “…Fine. But will there be enough room? You said Kanji-kun was with you guys,”

“Why IS he in your tent, anyway?” Yukiko asked. “Isn’t he supposed to be sharing one with his group?”

“They all got quiet when he was in there, he said. We let him bunk with us,” Yosuke grinned, trying not to snicker. “That’s… actually the real reason I’m out here. I kinda pissed him off, so I had to am-scray.”

“What did you do?” Chie sighed.

“I-I just made a couple jokes about his Shadow--- I made a crack, asking if he were really gay and if Narukami and I would be safe sleeping with him. …Man, the look on his face! I never saw anyone turn that red!”

“What?!” Yukiko snapped; out of reflex, she slapped Yosuke across the face. “You asshole! How could you say something like that?!”

“I-It was just a joke…! Sort of… I mean, his Shadow was practically eying Narukami and I--- a-and those two muscular shadows it summoned groped our asses!”

“But his Shadow was just an extension of his feelings--- the way he was made fun of as a kid made him keep them locked up inside.”

Yosuke rubbed the back of his neck. “Yeah… Narukami told me that…” he looked at himself and Chie. “I wonder why our Shadows never transformed into something like that, Chie. Ours dressed like us--- they just acted like jerks,”

“I wondered that too… Why did mine look like some evil twin of mine, while Yukiko’s was a princess?” Chie agreed.

“Well… maybe it’s based on how others make us feel?” Yukiko guessed. “I felt like a princess, Kanji felt like a gay stereotype… But, despite both of your inner-feelings, no one dubbed you two as anything else.”

“I think I get it…” Yosuke crossed his arms, letting out a sigh. “…and now I feel like a dick… He’s probably dealing with enough, after what everyone saw on the Midnight Channel.”

“I suggest you apologize to him. NOW.” Yukiko said firmly, a heated glare in her eyes. “What you said was downright mean-spirited!”

“Yeah. A-And you have no right to tease him about it, anyway! You keep making lewd comments--- how would you like it if we accused you of being a sex offender?!” Chie snapped. “I’ve got a cell-phone full of the gross text messages you send me at night as proof!”

Yosuke flinched. “Alright, alright, I’ll go apologize! No need to get personal…”

“You’re already there, Hana-moron.”

Yukiko snickered, covering her mouth to stifle a laughing fit. “Hee hee hee! That’s a pretty good nickname for him…! *snort* Ha ha!”

“Shh! Shh! Keep it down, Yukiko! You’ll wake the whole camp!”

“C-C’mon, our tent is over here. …It might be a little cramped, but I think we can make room,” Yosuke assured as they snuck over to his tent. The lantern was out, and it was quiet save for soft snoring. “Huh. They must be asleep. Better be qui--- guh!” He froze after poking his head in.

“W-What’s wrong?” Chie asked, as she and Yukiko looked in.

“Aww…” Yukiko sighed softly.

Lying in the middle of the tent were Yu and Kanji; at some point during their slumber, the leader’s head ended up resting against the rebel’s chest; the first-year’s arm was draped around his senpai’s shoulders, both of them looking content.

“Oh geez… I was right…” Yosuke said, his voice almost cracking.

Chie elbowed him in the ribs. “If you say one word, I’ll kick you in the balls so hard your semen will ache!” she hissed.

“Oh c’mon! They’re curled up together!”

“I think it’s pretty sweet… But, should we wake them and let them know we’re here?”

“Let’s let them sleep,” Yukiko advised, then grinned. “Hee hee, they can actually serve as a barrier between us and Yosuke.” She looked at the right side of the tent. “We can sleep on this side.”

Yosuke’s shoulders slumped. “But that’s my side… and there’s a huge rock on the other side! It’ll kill my back!”

Chie crossed her arms, giving him a look. “Well, maybe that’ll teach you to think twice before you make gay-cracks about someone, hmm?” She and Yukiko crawled over to the left side. “(Careful, Yukiko, it slants here…)”

“It’s only for tonight. We’ll be out early in the morning,” Yukiko assured, lying down with Chie.

Yosuke groaned, lying down on the left side, adjusting himself so that he wasn’t too close to the middle or lying on a rock; he ended up on his side, his back slightly arched. Damn, his muscles were going to ache after this…!

He looked over at Kanji and Yu, trying to get his head around their position; sure, in his mind, he figured the tough rebel secretly liked to cuddle (something he was sure to tease him for later)… but looking at their leader, he was confused. He was only outside the tent for maybe 20 minutes, half an hour at the most--- they couldn’t have ended up that close in such a short amount of time, especially with the amount of time it takes someone to fall asleep (which, given their poor location, would be triple the effort).

Plus, Yu’s head was on Kanji’s chest… the silver-haired student using the freshman as a pillow. The way the rebel was laying--- one arm around his senpai, the other sprawled by his side--- it seemed he made no effort to curl up with the leader.

In actuality… it seemed like Yu was the one who snuggled first…

So, our leader cuddles in his sleep… Yosuke thought, beginning to drift off as fatigue set in despite his suspicions were going haywire. I wonder if that’s his only secret, though…

He wasn’t alone, as Yukiko and Chie were looking at Yu as well; the leader had been training with the tomboy for a while, and had just started hanging out with the inn-heiress. “Hey, Chie… do you think Yu-chan…?” the latter quietly whispered.

Chie shook her head. “L-Let’s not jump to conclusions… otherwise we’d be no better than Yosuke.” She smiled, looking over at the middle. “…besides, it’s kinda cute. Oh, I wish I could take a picture with my cell phone,”

“Um, maybe it would be best if we kept this a secret. For their sake.” Yukiko rubbed her arm. “I don’t want them getting teased...”

“Yeah… Okay. Consider my lips sealed,”

Yukiko nodded, and the two drifted to sleep.

…

Unbeknownst to them, their leader overheard everything. He had only been half-asleep by the time they came in--- Kanji dosed off quicker than he did, his arms stretching out. The silver-haired student had no choice but to lift his head above the left arm… and it automatically curled around him. He would have moved, scooted over… but knew that would make him a liar after stating he was comfortable in the middle with the freshman.

In fact, he was more comfortable than he thought he would be.

After a lonely life in the city, it felt nice to be held by someone--- guy or girl, it left a warm feeling in his heart. He actually felt like the bond between him and Kanji would be growing closer soon.

Not to mention… he did like the rebel. He admired his will to change, the effort he was making to turn a new leaf, how he opened up to the group after his recovery… And Yu wanted to see the best of him.

He stole a glance over at Yukiko and Chie, thankful they would stay quiet about it. Yosuke would probably make jokes about it, but the leader was already thinking up retorts to counter his wise-cracks.

Closing his eyes, Yu began to nod off, listening to the chorus of soft breathing, mild snores, and a strong heartbeat drumming against his ear.

Yes, he certainly felt safe.  

[individuationfic]

Seeking to Seize Chapter 9

AO3

Yu forgot how much he hates humidity.

The TV world is oppressive enough without the heat radiating throughout the bath house. He’s absolutely dripping with sweat and his glasses keep fogging up, making it nearly impossible to see. In a fit of desperation, he strips out of his uniform jacket and rolls his sleeves up to his elbows.

The rest of his team is in a similar state. Yukiko has tied her hair up with her uniform scarf and divested herself of her tights, which is as far as her propriety will allow her to strip. Chie, on the other hand, is down to a thin camisole and her bike shorts, completely unashamed. Yu has a feeling Chie being half-naked is more of a distraction to Yukiko than the distressing heat could ever be.

Yu, personally, is trying extraordinarily hard to not be distracted by Yosuke’s sweaty collarbone and the way his white shirt has become transparent from the moisture being produced by his skin. He wonders if the bath house itself has something to do with his lustful thoughts. Tatsumi Kanji’s Shadow made his Midnight Channel appearance clearly homoerotic and sexual. Maybe this is one of the gimmicks.

Not that that matters right now. They have a person to save.

They continue forward.

Communicating with Nanako is difficult. She doesn’t know JSL and isn’t a strong reader. Yu has to resort to simple gestures to convey even the most basic concepts. And that really sucks, because Nanako’s a great kid and he wants to get to know her.

Thankfully, her science teacher wants the class to grow vegetables at home, and there just so happens to be a plot of dirt next to the Dojima house.

He’s more than willing to help her garden. After all, he’s not going to let her do it by herself. With a serial killer on the loose, it’s not safe. So he rolls up his sleeves and gets dirt under his fingernails and works up a sweat.

It takes about an hour to set everything up. When they’re done, Yu’s eyes meet Nanako’s and flashes her a thumbs up, and her proud grin is the sunrise.

The fight against Tatsumi Kanji’s Shadow is rough. He’s mostly physical-based, and he figures out Yukiko’s status as their healer pretty quick. By the end, everyone is exhausted, especially Chie, who kept leaping in front of Yukiko to shield her from oncoming attacks. Remind me to lecture her later, he tells Izanagi. She’s going to give me a heart attack if she keeps doing that.

With the exception of the Shadow getting punched, the rest is pretty routine. Kanji’s persona is awakened and he collapses, and the team has to help him back to the Junes electronics section. “You know,” Yosuke says on the way, “that was a lot less dramatic than rescuing Yukiko.”

Kanji, head hanging, mumbles something. Yukiko smiles and says, “we’ll explain everything when you’re feeling better.”

Yu remembers something he heard and signs, ‘Tell him he has to come to school first.’ Yosuke relays the message and Kanji must groan because Chie laughs and slaps him on the back.

Something light rises in Yu’s chest. The’ve done it again. They’ve saved two lives. Maybe he’s a good leader after all.

[Amagi Yukiko]: Was I like Kanji-kun when you saved me?

[Narukami Yu]: It’s hard to say.

[Narukami Yu]: I mean, you obviously didn’t punch your Shadow.

[Narukami Yu]: I can’t really compare what you and Kanji said, so you’re better off asking Yosuke or Chie.

[Amagi Yukiko]: Oh, right! Sorry!

[Narukami Yu]: What brought this on?

[Amagi Yukiko]: Kanji-kun was just so vulnerable today.

[Amagi Yukiko]: If you don’t mind me asking, what was it like for you?

[Narukami Yu]: It wasn’t the same as it was for the rest of you. I didn’t have to accept my Shadow.

[Amagi Yukiko]: Really?

[Narukami Yu]: Izanagi said it was because I had to fight for myself.

[Amagi Yukiko]: That’s kind of sad.

[Amagi Yukiko]: For the record, I would have fought for you.

[Narukami Yu]: Thank you.

[Narukami Yu]: Good night, Yukiko.

[Amagi Yukiko]: Good night, Yu-kun.

Yosuke lies awake in bed far longer than he expected to.

The TV world usually wipes him out, so much so that he falls asleep as soon as his head hits the pillow. Even now he feels exhaustion tugging at his eyes, but he can’t sleep, not with his thoughts running rampant though his head and his heart beating deafeningly loud in his ears.

“It ain’t about dudes or chicks,” Kanji’s voice repeats. “I’m just terrified of not being accepted, dammit!”

Well, that’s a normal fear, isn’t it? Most people are scared of not being accepted. That’s why they lie and fake, why they buy into beauty ads, why the spend a ridiculous amount of money on clothes. There is absolutely nothing remarkable about that particular fear.

So why did Yosuke’s chest tighten when he heard Kanji’s admission? Why can’t he stop thinking about it? His traitorous mind compares this to his jealousy over Yu about his phone and says, There’s something about Yu, he’s not just a friend.

But.

Yosuke is straight, okay? He likes girls. The worn magazines hidden under his bed can attest to that. Hell, Yukiko can attest to that! He’d asked her out the day he met Yu! The only way in which Yu is more than a friend is that they’re partners.

You need to sleep, Jiraya says, startling him. All your worrying is giving me a headache.

You don’t even have a head like this, Yosuke points out.

Jiraya ignores this. I’ll help you sleep.

Suddenly, all of Yosuke anxieties melt away and his heart rate slows. His mouth opens with a might yawn and, before the sound is over, he is asleep.

Kanji awakens some hours later.

The sky outside his window is still dark and the air is still. It’s either late at night or early in the morning, then. He moves to throw his covers off and go to the bathroom, and when they don’t budge, he glances down and sees his mom. Her knees are on the floor and her head is resting on her arms over his blankets. He must have fallen asleep waiting for him to wake up.

Guilt floods his body. He can’t imagine what she’s been going through. If his senpai hadn’t rescued him in time…

Slowly, like one might do if a cat was sleeping nearby, he retracts his legs from under the blanket and swings them to the wide until his feet brush the floor. He carefully tiptoes around the stray bolts of fabric and sewing needles so he can take a leak. Has he even peed since he was kidnapped? He can’t remember. When he’s done, she sneaks back into his room and, out of curiosity, checks his phone where it’s charging on his desk. It was dead when he was rescued, so he hasn’t looked at it. To his surprise, he actually has texts.

New Chat

[Narukami Yu] → [Tatsumi Kanji]

[Narukami Yu]: Hey, I’m one of the people that found you. Your mom gave me your number.

[Narukami Yu]: I just wanted to let you know there’s no rush. Just focus on getting rested up. We’ll be here when you’re ready.

He wonders which one Narukami was, but he’s still exhausted. He can ask when he goes back to school. His phone flips closed with a click and is returned to its position on the desk.

Gently, he shakes his mom awake. She blinks at him, eyes bleary, before she realizes what is going on and tugs him down to her level and into her arms. “Don’t you ever scare me like that again,” she tells him, voice thick with emotion. “I already lost your dad. I can’t lose you, too.”

He wishes he could be strong. He wishes he could reassure her. He wishes he was an adult. But, in his mom’s arms, he’s a child again, and all he can say is, “Can you sleep with me until morning?”

The last time they’d slept together was right after his dad died. Tomorrow, he’d told himself, I’ll man up and be the man of the house. Tonight, I want my mom to hold me.

His mom climbs into his bed, which is clearly to small for the both of them, wraps her arms as far around his middle as his girth will allow, and squeezes. “Good night, Kanji.”

“Night, Ma,” he replies, and, for the first time in what feels like a long time, he breathes.