#and maybe have him experience at least 5 more traumatic events before the end of the fic

[mizartz]

The man with his rucksack raises the gun. Danny looks at him, really looks at him, sees his wide eyes and trembling hands and thinks that it serves him right. Danny’s own eyes glow green and bright, blood dripping down his face. “Better make it count,” he snarls.

fanart for close enough to be whole again by @hailsatanacab <3 i am obsessed with this fic!!!

[paladin-of-nerd-fandom65]

It’s ok for the lateness, the questions and I aren’t going anywhere lol

1: what type of weapons does Chris uses? I know for Jake he uses the typical “Batman” stuff and I saw a older post of yours saying he uses special “Nightwing sticks” to shoot beams of starbolts; it would be cool to see he can concentrate the starbolts in the sticks to become a lightsaber or maybe a battle axe.

2: is the Superman last son comic canon in your “universe?” Like Chris arrived to earth in that spaceship and then a few days/weeks later he sacrificed himself to close the portal getting aged up etc…

3: I read a post yesterday that Chris has blue heat version, does he had that before or after the Nightwing dragon entity?

4: what’s the most traumatic moment the duo experience?

5: how strong is Chris compared to the rest of his family before and after receiving the Nightwing dragon power? I can see him being the weakest since being born in the phantom zone and maybe third or second strongest after receiving Nightwing.

6: How old was Jake and what was he doing when he received his powers?

1. Primarily his main weapons of choice are dual wield Ecrima Sticks that contain special pores within their handles that allow his starbolts to travel into and supercharge some taser tips at the end of them at a voltage enough to stun both men and monsters. As complete maximum charge, the sticks can work in a manner akin to lightsabers as they can now deflect major energy attacks.

He can also combine his sticks at their other tips into a collapsible bo staff. Should Skybird finds himself without his sticks, he’s knowledgeable in multiple martial arts both Earth and Tamaran based in combination with his power set so he’s still not completely defenseless.

2. Primarily about the first half of it is more or less canon to these series of events; the events of him crash landing in an experimental pod in the heart of Metropolis west he first meets Clark (for a small artistic change from the original panel, Chris is clad in a black bodysuit like the one he had in his last appearance before the events of Flashpoint but that’s just a small detail), gets taken in by the DEO where they make the discovery of his Kryptonian heritage and just as they were taking him to another facility, Clark secretly interfered to stop them. He then takes in the 6 year old into his household after the intent to the public clear that he can stay with a human family as foster parents (I.e. him and Lois’ household alongside there then 4 year old son Jon) right before Bizarro, under orders from Luthor, attacked but during it, Chris saved Lois from getting crushed by the Daily Planet Globe. From there, things deviate with some parts and pieces adapted from the Kurt Busiek Superman run along with some tiny parts of the 2015 Lois and Clark series, detailing of a growing bond between Chris and Jon as they grow up together as brothers.

It’s not until Chris reaches 11 1/2 to 12 years of age when Zod and his army finally arrive from the Phantom Zone. By then, the bulk of Chris’ memories as Lor Zod have came back to him, in particular of the harsh way Zod raised him which reinforces both his inner insecurities as a Kent yet also his desire to stay with Clark and Lois. Plus advanced tests and scans from the Fortress of Solitude and the DCU’s top scientists help determine his place of origin.

3. At least in my fanon verse, it’s a trait he had basically since birth due to his birth in the Phantom Zone and all the wired effects it can do to even a Kryptonian’s physiology. Once he’s exposed to moonlight (and maybe partial yellow sunlight), that heat vision is accessible to him

4. Chris; easy his earlier childhood when raised by Zod. In this case, think of it along with how both Dabi and Shoto were raised underneath the reign of Enji Todoroki from My Hero Academia combine with a bit of how Zuko’s childhood went when Fire Lord Ozai was raising him from Avatar: The Last Airbender.

As for Jake; there’s three primary bad memories his mind circles back to during his emotional lowest moments. They are the time a Gordanian raid at Bludhaven came about when he was 4, him and Big Sis Mar’i bring outright ripped away from Kory’s arms by the sinister flying lizards which would’ve resulted in them being taken into slavery hadn’t it not been for their Mom and Dad acting fast to get them out of those arms

Then, for a second place of bad memories, when he was 9, getting abducted during a routine by a Talon and sent into a Labyrinth by the Court of Owls . For three days and two nights, he was lost and unable to escape the menacing white walls and never ending zigzagging maze, talons stalking him at every corner and only one fountain of fresh water to drink only said water was contaminated with substances that could make him start losing his mind no matter how thirsty he is. It was only by him taking advantage of an old school camera meant to capture his moments of torment and weak points in the marble foundation during another Talon encounter did he manage to escape the Labyrinth, reuniting with his family and taking the fight to the Owls themselves along with the rest of the Titans

Though of course in first place above all else, even more so than that fateful duel with Zsasz himself, that moment his father and him were investigating what Z list ex criminal Humpty Dumpty was doing going though some trouble for taking some broken toys to fix at an abandoned orphanage. Jake however then discovered it wasn’t just the toys that were broken….it was an entire orphanage of street urchins and orphans, no younger than 8 but no older than 12, that were broken. Humpty was trying to ‘fix’ them too in the best way he though he knew to no avail, and all during the weeks leading up to Christmas as well.

That image of the lifeless kids being carted into vans on stretchers with white blankets draped over them one by one is an image that haunts Jake’s memories to the present day. Ironic considering his own sleeping arrangements often have him covered up in his bed with the blankets draped over him similarly like that. Maybe the difference comes to that at least his family can hear him snoring peacefully under those sheets…not so much the case for those poor orphans that night.

5. His strength prior to the Nightwing entity being fully tapped into could be considerably between Jon and Conner, making about only the second weakest of the bunch. Once the entity was tapped into in full though, his power level increased dramatically being about the same as Kara, second only behind Clark’s himself…as he gets older though, it’s still growing, at a rate only matched by Jon’s growth

6. Jake’s powers first kicked in at the age of 8 when he was trying to fend himself from a school bully (he’s a late bloomer since Mar’i first got her powers basically since birth). At first, he kept them a tight secret even from his family, afraid of them getting out of control since they were mainly linked to his emotions. Naturally the Graysons find out about them during a time he was helping them in patrol, and felt ashamed. Dick and Kory though we’re understanding and after a talk between all of them that night, Kory and Mar’i helped Jake get a good learning with his newfound powers relatively quickly.

(Phew) it’s a lot @gothicghost2000 but I t’s worth it XD

[thetrashbagswasteland]

useful/fun character development questions for couples #s 5-7, 11, 12 and 27 for whoever you'd like

Thank you!! I'm gonna answer these for AviTis mainly bc that's what's providing my primary brainrot rn 😂 5- How do they consciously realize that they like the other character? Does it take them a while? Liking each other casually as friends is easy - Castis extends the hand of friendship and after some panicked scrutiny, Avitus accepts it. To actually call one another friends takes maybe weeks from the time of meeting, primarily because they're 15 and 16, sharing a dorm in basic training and don't particularly have pre-existing friends there so it's ideally suited to bonding quickly. Being friends just makes sense to them given the circumstances.

6- How do they react to the realization that they like the other character? Is it an “oh my god I’m never going to think about this again” thing, or are they pretty comfortable with it? The realisation they're in love is something else entirely. Avitus realises it first, coming to recognise his feelings as genuinely being love only after Castis has met, fallen in love and married his wife. It's something that upsets him a lot because he knows he's missed his chance and refuses to begrudge them their happiness - and thinks that he's an unloveable person anyways. Castis only works out the depths of his feelings much, much later. It's once again too late, long after he's certain that Avitus doesn't want that level of commitment and so he buries it and pretends it's just because they're friends.

7- Do they (or would they) pursue the other character’s affection, and if so, how? Do they tell the other character how they feel? Try to earn their admiration? Woo them with romantic gestures? Flirt with them, skillfully or otherwise? Neither one of them are terribly romantic or skilled in romance - and neither wants to be romantic (with each other at least). Flirting is a prelude to sex and very much only seen as good for that by the both of them, with that then allowing them to be affectionate under the excuse of happy hormones (they're TOTALLY emotionally healthy right?). Their love language nevertheless is presence; just being near one another is enough for them and, most crucially, doesn't demand that they say anything they can be held to. 11- What fears, past traumas, etc. would be hardest for them to talk about with their partner? For Avitus, it takes more than a decade of knowing each other to open up about his traumatic childhood, something he'd have gladly kept silent for life if not for the fact that he wants to use his past to affirm Castis' decision is the right one. For Castis, he's in the unfortunate position that Avitus is far, far too perceptive and was present for most of the traumatic events in his life. His greatest fear though is that he'll be abandoned in the end, after giving up every part of himself.

12- How much independence do they prefer in a relationship—do they want to share their lives as much as possible with their partner, or do they prefer to mostly do their own thing and let their partner do their own thing? Both of them are quite independent people on the whole. Castis definitely being more content with consistent company than Avitus is but both happy to do their own thing most of the time; holidays, weekends and planned time off together accompanied with only seeing each other in passing the rest of the time. Both need their own space and breathing room around their relationship and that's just fine for them.

27- They have to apologize to their partner. Is this difficult for them? How do they approach it? In the earlier years? That's an argument. They'd rather fight and fuck the frustration out before mutually considering the matter settled, regardless of where guilt sits. Sorry is a word Avitus finds easier to say, but one which Castis generally means more readily. They get better with time, experience navigating disagreements and most importantly, therapy. Therapy's the biggest factor in learning to navigate disagreements and genuinely does a lot to help them be comfortable as a couple.

[nerdwhoauthorinserts]

A collection of Me(s).

Here are some of my self inserts.

   You’re probably already well-acquainted with the first two, maybe even the third, but the last ones I’ve barely talked about.

   Originally, I was going to add three more, but I haven’t actually designed them yet, so I didn’t want to design a character AND draw them out for this at the same time.

(S/Is brief explanation listed below the cut. From left to right, top to bottom)

1. Copycat - My Marvel Comics S/I.    He primarily exists in his own continuity I call ‘The Copyverse’ (Which is based on early-MCU, Ultimate Spiderman, and a few other versions of the Marvel universe + My own interpretations.) 

   He’s a shapeshifter who’s the son of literal Death and was assassinated by a drug lord to get access to his powers. He follows Loki as their assistant at first after empathizing with them, but they grow a friendship that ends up turning into a mutual pining mess.

2. Plague Rat - My DC Comics/Batman S/I.    He’s an explosive-happy pyromaniac who was...basically kidnapped by a group of scientists after getting accidentally injected with rat stem cells. The ensuing experiments left him with abilities over pest animals and disease.

   Before he was kidnapped, he met and subsequently bonded with Jonathan Crane, aka, ‘The Scarecrow’. This bond eventually became romantic in nature.

3. [Still doesn’t have a name, oops.] - My Slasher S/I.    An artist who was raised in an abusive household with his witch-sister. After the death of his childhood pet cat, his sister tried to use her magic to bring it back to life, but it went horribly wrong, resulting in the S/I absorbing his cat’s essence, gaining an extremely high prey drive, predatory instincts, and cat-like abilities. (He also has the ability to transform into a were-cat, but let’s not worry about that-) 

   After his sister left, he started taking his aggression and prey drive out on local wildlife, leading to his religious parents locking him in the attic for being a ‘devil child’. His parents...mysteriously disappeared after that. Leading to his sister inheriting the house and discovering him still there. I use him occasionally for Blahms and Blakael stuff, but it’s mostly just ordinary me, lol.

4. Vulpenire - My Cuphead S/I.    A vampire fox who made a deal with the devil to gain the abilities of the stars. He can turn into a fox constellation, shoot stars, and has basic vampire powers as well. (He also has a hidden mouth on his tail, but let’s not worry about that-)

   He becomes one of the Devil’s lackeys as a result of the deal, and is originally seen as a rival by King Dice. Dice eventually realizes though, that Vulpen doesn’t want his position, and ends up developing a bond with him after he decidedly starts bothering him to take better care of himself.

5. [Another without a proper differentiate-able name] - My Arcane S/I.    A man who approached Viktor during a big celebration looking for an interview. They quickly ended up getting along, as Viktor found that he had some interesting ideas for Hextech. This more or less ended up turning...you guessed it, romantic. Eventually, though, Blake disappeared. 

   An accident occurred leading to his disappearance, so he replaced his missing parts with mechanics. (He lost parts of his face, limbs, and had to replace his spine.) The accident also left him with gaps in his memory due to how traumatic it was.

  When he returned after the events of Arcane, he looked like he does in the picture, attempting to steal some of the Hextech. Turns out, he was in the custody of Silco all that time, developing a sibling-like bond with Jinx in the background.

6. Kabel - My ‘The Dragon Prince’ S/I.    A Human/SkyWing elf hybrid created using Dark Magic. Because of the nature of his creation, he’s able to use Dark Magic and Sky Magic, while not needing to sacrifice to use Dark magic for the most part... or at least that’s what they assume. Though that isn’t entirely true. 

   Aaravos concocts a test at one point, hiding a magic creature under Kabel’s bed, and finding it dead with all it magic sucked out of it the next morning. Kabel, essentially, is a magic vampire, siphoning magic from any magical creature he sleeps around without realizing it in order to keep himself alive and also in order to fuel his ability to use dark magic.

   Aaravos and him start with Aaravos using Kabel’s near-instant crush on him as leverage, but Aaravos slowly ends up being endeared by him to the point of actually returning his feelings.

[paperpennies]

Please tell me about your AU idea where Sasha and Milla meet in Brazil as teenagers and basically end up long-distance dating before either of them become Psychonauts ^_^

Oh hey look at that, totally out of nowhere, not prompted by me at all! (@2somethingelseyoumightknow2 and @strawberry-et also asked me about it but it seems redundant to answer three separate asks. I didn’t think three people would actually do it lol. Also sorry for taking 8 years to answer.) This idea came out of just smushing two thoughts together. Then I got weirdly attached. Buckle in; it’s gonna be pretty long.  Under a cut to avoid annoying feed scrolling.

So, AU is: Sasha mom lives, meaning he turns out a lot better emotionally adjusted since he grows up with at least one attentive parent. His dad is better too- still pretty emotionally constipated but not, like, broken the way he is in canon. The family also has 4-5 more kids after Sasha. This does mean they’re pretty poor but they do okay. 

His mother is a schoolteacher, who is somewhat unusual in the time period for working and being a mom of a big family at the same time. She and Sasha are quite close; he gets a lot of his intellectual and curious side from her. In his eyes, he’s much more like her than like his dad (although people who know them both would say he’s a lot more like his father than he thinks). His mother also knows about his psychic powers, having noticed them as soon as they started showing up, but his dad and siblings (probably) don’t. 

The story starts when Sasha is 14-15 years old. He’s getting increasingly bored living in a small rural town with few opportunities related to his interests, and his developing psychic powers (and probable undiagnosed autism) make things even more complicated and difficult for him. His mother gets an opportunity, probably with some kind of charity organization, to go teach German/English and maybe other stuff in Brazil for a while. She decides to take it, and take Sasha with her so he can have some different life experiences. She also takes his youngest sister along, since she’s still very little and dad’s already going to be left alone with three other kids. 

(Also, my assumed age for Sasha and Milla in the games is like mid-30s, which, if the games take place in mid/late 80s, would mean they were born in the mid-50s. That means they would be 14-15 in the late 60s. So that’s the timeline I’m going with here.) 

So they go to Brazil. The school Sasha’s mom is working at is either at or associated with an orphanage- maybe a church that has a school and an orphanage. Of course, Milla is there. I don’t have a lot of the details locked in here. It’s hard because we know nothing about Milla’s family or life before she was working at the orphanage, so I’m really just pulling this out of nowhere to fit in with this AU. For the purposes of this, she has no family and is living at the orphanage and going to the school there (even though that’s sad and I kinda don’t like it. May change it. Hm.)

Anyway, Sasha’s mom is teaching at the school; Sasha is doing basically independent study. I also haven’t decided if Milla is in his mom’s classes, because I haven’t decided what age group(s) she’s teaching. Either Milla’s in her classes or gets employed (or volunteers) to babysit Sasha’s little sister and that’s how she comes to be around. Oh, and also for the purposes of this, Sasha’s mom already spoke Portuguese before this, and Sasha’s been learning it prior to arriving there, so he’s like conversational at least. 

Either way, Sasha and Milla meet. Despite having some initial personality conflict, they find they have a weird connection to each other. Milla is curious about this feeling and interprets it as maybe being a crush, although it feels a little bit different. She decides to try and befriend him to understand it better, and also because that’s just what Milla does. She’s the sort of person who makes people her friends half-against-their-will just by being friendly and caring consistently until they can’t deny that they’re friends.

Sasha, meanwhile, is wary of her and her enthusiasm because he’s not great with the social stuff, especially with the culture and language gaps at play. He’s also wary of the feeling because it seems psychic-related, but he doesn’t know what that means. Plus Milla is like super pretty and nice and he gets tongue-tied and red-faced whenever she talks to him, but he definitely doesn’t like her shut up Mom.

Over time, Milla’s determination prevails, and they become genuine friends. He hides the fact that he’s psychic at first, but eventually does tell her. He asks her if she’s sure she’s not psychic, because she really seems psychic somehow. She doesn’t think she is, but he theorizes she’s probably not quite normal, at least, and that’s where the connection they’ve felt from the beginning comes from.

Since they’re actually perfect for each other, their friendship grows deeper over the months they spend hanging out. By the time Sasha has to leave, they’ve developed real romantic (in a 14-15 year old way) feelings for each other. They don’t ever really talk about it, but promise to write.

And they do. Sasha’s siblings start referring to the girl he writes to as his girlfriend to tease/annoy him, but eventually it sticks. He stops protesting, although he never confirms whether or not it’s true, and it starts being matter-of-fact to them instead of a joke. On Milla’s side, she still talks about him to her friends like he’s still there, and she gets the penpal-boyfriend teasing, too. It doesn’t really bug her, though. They save up money over a few years to go and visit each other, and talk about their relationship enough to be sort of “official”. It’s rough since they rarely get to see each other in person or even talk on the phone, but they keep going. 

Years pass, and some things change and others don’t. Sasha mother dies when he’s in his late teens, and he and his dad start having bigger and bigger issues between them in the wake of greiving. He leaves home as soon as he’s sure his younger siblings will be fine without him around. Out and about in the world, he gets recruited into the Psychonauts within the next few years (the specifics of this don’t matter too much for this AU). Milla goes on to work in her orphanage, the thing she’s most passionate about. They still keep close in touch, and get to see each other a more often now that they’re grown up and Sasha has better access to international travel. They finally decide “okay yes, we really are actually dating” even though it’s still long distance. Sasha’s colleagues 100% do not believe his story about having a beautiful long-distance girlfriend in Brazil, because that would sound fake af even if wasn’t coming from the very serious, not-romantic-at-all Sasha. Even his picture of them together does not convince them.

Then, the thing happens. Milla’s orphanage burns down, and her psychic powers finally fully awaken. Because of her knowledge of psychics, she realizes what’s happening, but it’s still a horrifically traumatic event. Sasha takes a leave period to come and help her, finds that it’s even more serious than he’d expected, and puts her in touch with the Psychonauts directly for some better assistance. He’s too close to her to do more than an initial check-up himself. 

They find Milla has a lot of potential and extend an offer to join the intern program (which at that time spans a larger age range than later on). She rejects the offer at first, tries to go back to her life, but later decides she needs to make a complete change and accepts. Sasha’s colleagues are shocked to find out she is indeed real. She graduates first out of her class, as one of the best levitators the organization has ever seen. Technically, she and Sasha aren’t supposed to be romantically involved as agents, but the Psychonauts have always been pretty loosey-goosey about that rule (given the history of its founders). 

So that was a novel in length. It’s not necessarily that interesting in this form, but there’s the AU. I think the interest would be the specifics of how their relationship would play out as a story, if they met young enough and under the right circumstances to not to get stuck in the hang-ups their relationship has in canon. If you read this far, tell me what you think! Thoughts, feelings, emotional outbursts?

[artsy0wl]

My Son (A New Teen Titans Fic)

So I have a headcanon or two for Joey “Jericho” Wilson. One being that, due to his childhood trauma, he as PTSD. I actually made a series elsewhere where I discuss how each Titan would react to it.

I also had a little fic series planned out about Slade visiting Joey during the night since he couldn’t during the day (due to work and Adeline). It was a 5 + 1, but as it went on, it felt a hit repetative and I really wamted to do the last one where Slade gets caught. By Nightwing of all people. And they decide to have a talk.

It’s a fun little project that I thought ya’ll might enjoy.

It had been two months since Joey had joined the Titans, and two months that Slade had to carefully sneak in to see his son. He had been successful and was thankful that he had not been caught. But that didn't mean he wasn't cautious.

This night was no different. As he sat on the edge of the bed, Slade noted Joey's good health. He was healthy, his weight appeared normal, and he showed no signs of physical damage. Slade was glad that the Titans were treating him well. It was something that he was sure that Adeline made them promise, with Nightwing probably the first to experience her protective rage first hand.

As his father, all that Slade could ask for was his son being in good hands. However, he couldn't entirely bring himself to fully agree with the arrangement. If it were up to him, Joey would be with either parent, preferably both, or on his own. Joey didn't need to get caught up in all this fighting, even if he had a love for helping others.

Slade's train of thought was disrupted as Joey unconsciously flinched. His body twitched in distress as he unconsciously found himself trapped in a nightmare. One hand gently grabbed Joey's arm while the other cupped the side of his face.

"It's okay Joey." Slade comfortably whispered. "Dad's here. Everything's okay now."

Joey seemed to listen to his father as he unconsciously melted in his father's grip. When his breathing regulated and his flinching stopped, Slade adjusted Joey's blanket. Slade let out a deflated sigh.

"How long have you been there?" Slade sighed, knowing that he was being watched.

"Long enough." Nightwing admitted.

"And how long have you known?"

"Two weeks."

Slade rose from his seat to face the young vigilante. He looked at Nightwing, not with anger or resentment, but exhaustion. He didn't want to be caught after such a long record of escaping unseen. Least of all by Nightwing.

"What are you going to do?" Slade inquired. "Arrest me for visiting my son?"

Nightwing sighed, shaking his head. He approached the mercenary, cautiously, but unfazed by his presence. He gave the mercenary an unusually tired grin.

"Would you like a cup of coffee?" Nightwing offered.

Slade shockingly flinched at the offer, eyeing Nightwing curiously. While spontaneous moments of kindness was nothing new for Nightwing, the fact that he was offering one of his sworn advisories coffee was. Nightwing's expression softened slightly, knowing that he had stumped Slade.

"I've been up working on tying a few loose ends for cases back in Gotham and am not going to bed any time soon." Nightwing shrugged his shoulders. "The next person up will be Raven and that's not for another two hours. And Joey not too long after that." He then glanced at Joey. "He'll still be here when we're done if you want to see him."

Slade bounced between Nightwing and his son. Joey was in a deep sleep, which was a good sign. And if he was going to be like that for a few hours, it wouldn't hurt if he stepped away for a moment.

"Why not?" Slade accepted.

A steaming mug of coffee was generously placed in front of Slade, as Dick sat on the other side of the table. Slade took it, gingerly picking it up before taking a sip. Dick's domino mask sat by him, letting Slade know that he wasn't afraid that he saw his true identity. Not that he hadn't already. They sat in silence for a few moments as they scanned each other.

"So, how did you find out?" Slade asked, setting the cup down.

"I guess it started when we initially got Joey situated in the Tower." Dick recalled, taking a bit of coffee before setting it down. "Adeline mentioned that he suffered from chronic nightmares. Mostly resulting from the trauma of losing his voice, your messy divorce, and Grant's death." Dick's coffee cup slightly shifted between his hands. "She also warned us that the events with Terra might add onto that trauma. Her recommendation, if we caught him in the midst of a nightmare, wake him up, talk him through it if need be, and get him back to bed."

"That does sound like her." Slade confirmed.

Slade could picture Adeline given the Titans a list of odd requests and requirements as well as warnings. It was probably for the best considering Joey's traumatic history. However, that didn't entirely answer his question and opened the door for a new one.

"So I'm guessing all of you do this?" Slade assumed.

"Me and Raven mostly." Dick stated. "Beast Boy was a bit untrusting of him after Terra's death." There was a brief pause as they both recalled the initial fallout. "And while he's gotten over it, he's still working on building a good relationship with Joey." Dick moved on to the next member. "Cyborg would, given that he knows a thing or two about trauma, but because of the nature of theirs being a bit different, he's not sure if he's the best candidate. Though he does well for the most part." That only left one other member. "Starfire gets it as well, and while she gets the difference between coping on Tamaran and Earth, he is a little intimidated by her more assertive nature."

Dick look at his cup thinking about their attempt to help. Or at the very least how they were handling it. It wasn't that they weren't trying, it was how familiar they were with Joey's or how they thought they could handle it.

"To actually answer your question though, we started noticing changes after the first month." Dick circled back around. "In that first month, he would wake up petrified almost every other night. He only got three hours of sleep a night in the first week alone." Dick's face twitched at the thought. "We thought part of it was because of the adjustment on top of the nightmares. Then about a month ago, his panic attacks got less frequent. He wasn't waking up as much and was opening up a bit more. Raven and I thought he was getting better. That maybe he was getting used to being here, and the panic attacks were clearing up naturally. We also thought that maybe with him being away from Adaline helped, thinking that her constant presence might have been part of the problem. Two weeks ago, Raven decided to take a step back. She's still open to helping, both as an empath and just wanting to be someone he could confide in. But at that point, she didn't feel the need to constantly gauge his emotions every night."

Dick sipped his coffee, recalling the conversation. He understood her decision. Without any incidents in two weeks, there might not have been a need to have him constantly monitored. Plus, she was starting to look a bit under the weather herself, which wouldn't benefit Joey's psyche, or what was equally as important, her health. As far as Dick was concerned, Raven retiring was probably good for both of their sakes.

"Which left me on and off." Dick continued. "I was up two weeks ago, helping tie up a few loose ends for a case involving Two Face that Robin and I worked on. I was taking a break, so I thought I would check on Joey. I wasn't overly concerned, but I figured why not? I was up so checking on him wasn't going to do any harm. When I turned the camera on, I was startled to find you in the room."

Slade twitched slightly. He vaguely recalled that night. It was ten days after Slade and Beast Boy had a sit down and cleared the air after Terra's death and another two after Slade and Wintergreen returned from a hunting trip that turned into Slade's first real contract after completing Grant's. Slade remembered feeling a paternal needing to see his son. To check on the kid to make sure everything was alright.

"You were sitting on the edge of the bed, much like you were tonight," Dick stated, "and you must have just calmed him down from a nightmare as well given how tightly he was unconsciously holding onto your sleeve."

There was a prolonged sense of silence as they took the time to digest Dick's story. It was detailed, which was a plus. However, it also left Slade with a lingering sense of tension and a need to explain himself.

"I just want to see my son." Slade admitted. "I know my job hasn't made it easy. Even less so, now that Adaline and I have divorced. My family is the one thing that is still important to me. I just wish I had more time with them. That I had done things differently." Slade eyed his coffee. "I miss my kids and I've screwed them both up in equally horrible ways. But for Joey's sake, I want to be in his life. And for my sanity, I have to be. Even if it’s in secret.”

"I understand." Dick replied, to a slightly curious glare. "I mean, as a parent, I don't understand where you're coming from, but as a child who had a parent being gone for periods of time, I understand." Another, slightly confused, glare dug into him. "Just because I grew up in a circus, and close to my parents, doesn't mean my father never spent periods of time away from us. I know two times where that happened. The first when my mother was on maternity leave with me and the second when I got a bad case of pneumonia that landed me in the hospital for a week. In both cases, Haly needed at least one Grayson to keep the show going. So my father had to spend long periods of time perfecting a one man routine." Dick took a sip of coffee. "I might not remember his time away when I was a baby, but I vaguely recall calling out for my father during the worst parts of my pneumonia, only for him not to show. I remember feeling pain from the pneumonia on top of feeling heartbroken when he wasn't there."

It might not have been what Slade wanted to hear, but it was something he didn't mind hearing either. Hearing how the other side fells, helped put things into perspective. Even if that perspective was a little different as far as history.

"You've raised a great kid." Dick complimented, catching Slade off guard a bit. "It's true. I've never met someone as kind hearted and wonderfully talented as he is. He's a wonderful human being. So if there's any positive takeaway from everything your family's been through, it's that."

Slade wasn't sure if he should take the compliment. With everything he's done to his kid, he wasn't sure if he could take credit for it, outside of half his DNA and its side effects. But at the same time, he appreciated Dick at least trying to be somewhat positive about it.

"He's the only good thing we have," Slade admitted, "not that we deserve him. But thank you anyways." Slade gave Dick an intense glare. "And thank you for what you've been doing for him. He needs people like you in his life."

"Of course. I want him to be comfortable."

After another half hour of conversing, Slade finally decided to call it a night. But not without saying goodbye to his son. He and Dick quietly waltz down the hall to Joey's room. Right as Slade was about to open the door when the door slid open on its own. On the other side, a slightly dazed Joey stood in front of them. He jumped in surprise when his sight processed what was in front of him. Which prompted Slade to glare at Dick suspiciously.

"Don't worry bud," Dick comforted, addressing Joey first, "I'm not going to arrest him. He just wanted to see you, but you were asleep. What are you doing up so early?"

"Smelled coffee." Joey signed. "Have to pee."

That was enough to answer Slade's suspicions. He couldn't blame Dick for his son's bladder and he was just as guilty as Dick was for the coffee smell. Turning his full attention back to Joey, Slade tried to think of what to say. Not expecting to get caught, he felt at a loss for words.

Joey tightly latched onto Slade, hugging him to fill his father's lack of response. His face dug into Slade's shoulder and let tears dampen Slade's coarse top. It was clear that Joey needed this almost as much as Slade did. More so even.

After a few moment, Joey gently tapped Slade letting him know he was done. He was released, and took care of any rogue tears.

"I missed you." Joey signed.

"Me too kid." Slade agreed with a soft smile. "I'm sorry I have been a bit neglectful."

"It's okay. I'm just glad you're here now." Joey turned his attention to Dick. "Thank you."

"You're welcome." Dick answered, approaching him. "I'm just glad you guys got to see each other."

[fromtheplanethexagon]

the robot problem: a critical look at tobecky, 5 years late

hello wordgirl fandom i am back :) and i have a lot of thoughts that i never got around to expressing before i moved on from the show. so be aware that everything i'm saying is based on my experiences during the 2012-2016 era of the fandom & state of tumblr in general, and i am not familiar with more recent fan content.

it's been over five years since the show ended, and @ifbrd​ reminded me (along with some great analysis) that while tobecky was super popular since before the show technically started (thanks to the play date shorts), it's pretty unhealthy in a lot of ways that tend to be excused or flat out ignored in fanworks. i'd like to reflect on that a bit (a lot); specifically, how both the show and the fandom approached this enemies-to-lovers ship, and how easily this ship can slip into uncomfortable territory if we're careless about how we interpret the ship and create fan content of it.

i will admit, i'm mostly writing this as a response to past me and my old creations - though i moved on from the show as a whole years ago, i do like taking the time to reflect on old interests once in a while, and reevaluating my thoughts on them. and this ship is probably the biggest one that still lurks in the corners of my mind once in a while, so let's go.

cherish is the word: a short positive note before a much longer negative one

i wanted to start this essay off with some positivity, because i am going to be very negative after this. tobecky was, in some ways, cute. it's obvious from the very beginning that these two characters are on pretty equal ground, even if one of them isn't aware of it. and that's part of the fun - the irony of how unaware tobey is that his nemesis/crush/person that pretty much always wins against him is someone that he completely dismisses as incompetent. i want to point this out because honestly, in general i don't like enemies-to-lovers because a lot of them use a power imbalance within the dynamic, and i hate power imbalances, especially when it comes to actual life-or-death scenarios (at least, as much as cartoons can do that). in most episodes, becky is never actually forced to go along with his wishes. she's not held in a 'date' against her will, nor is she ever really outwitted by him. i bring this up because there is one huge, uncomfortable exception, which i will get to later.

another big plus to the ship is the fact that they just... get along? even when fighting? of course we get brief moments where they just hang out and talk about paintings or whatever, but i'm talking about how much they get each other, even if they don't realize it. like the word banter, for example. been there since day one. becky loves words, and while most other people in her life don't really care (ranging from 'eh, that's cool i guess' to her brother calling it annoying), tobey gives her a chance to show off and thus treats her as a worthy adversary as herself, not because of her more generic superpowers - something that we've seen in canon that she feels self-conscious about (see: her motivation in patch game). one of the less noticed examples, to me, is "it's your party and i'll cry if I want to", because it's just - okay. they both are excluded from a social event, and while it's obvious that tobey deals with it by destroying the city, it's also pretty obvious that becky also deals with her frustration by fighting in that battle. like, yes, realistically it's just objectively bad that he's destroying buildings. but they're also providing each other with a way to work through their frustrations, first by fighting and then by talking things out, and finally by hanging out together instead of dwelling on being excluded from the party.

so it makes a lot of sense to me that many tobecky fans gravitated towards writing far-in-the-future fic, usually by implying that some growth had taken place before starting to write the ship. (there are, as far as i'm aware, 2... maybe 3 exceptions, that take the time to attempt a real redemption for him, at least when i left the fandom.) because if you take away his worst moments, either by reasoning out that he was 10 years old and a mess, or that he was a cartoon character in a cartoon world where everyone's actions are over-the-top, or by just flat-out pretending that certain episodes never happened, there's some pretty solid ground to start a ship on.

go gadget go: we all do not see it, we simply close our eyes (review of canon)

when the show began, i was the same age as the characters. a lot of other people were, too - at least in my cohort of the fandom. i think it's pretty safe to say that many of us have fond memories of the show's earlier seasons, and held on to that interest as we got older, for whatever reasons. so like, not to be all 'as an OG fan...', but i remember seeing the shorts air for the first time in 2006. i have a diary entry in july of 2009 about how i, a 12yo with no concept of the idea of 'shipping', was disappointed in the new tobey episode because i wanted more tobecky interactions. (that was robo-camping, btw, lol.) and so i remember how exciting their rivalry felt, watching them as someone literally their exact same age, and then watching that again as a nostalgic 17yo, and then uh... growing up, to put it frankly, and realizing just how unhealthy most of their interactions were.

okay what i meant to say was, this section is an overview of the relationship's canon portrayal throughout the years.

first, we have early tobecky: this includes the shorts and the first few seasons. this is their classic relationship: he likes her and takes robots on rampages to get her attention, she majorly disapproves and has fun taking him down. we've all seen the show, you know what i'm talking about. his backhanded ways of trying to find out her identity often feature prominently in the episodes, which - sigh, i've mentioned this whole issue before, but it's kind of a grey area in the whole uncomfortable-factor thing, because while trying to find out her identity is VERY invasive, it's something that like... everyone in the show tries to do, even her canon crush (scoops). on the one hand, it's really not a great look, but on the other hand, this is a cartoon meant to parody a genre in which this trope is extremely common. so i just wanna say that i have Issues and Thoughts on this aspect of their relationship, but there are other things i find more important to discuss here.

second, we have late tobecky: this is seasons 7-8. this is... a very strange and huge shift from the previous dynamic, though it's not necessarily obvious. what i mean by that is that for some reason, the show writers made it so that half of tobey’s rampages have nothing to do with his crush on wordgirl, even though that used to be the sole reason for his villainy. seriously. we have the birthday episode, where he's upset because he feels left out; wg vs tobey vs the dentist, where he's mad that he has a cavity; and trustworthy tobey, where his robot goes on a rampage... after becky accidentally makes it malfunction. the two outliers are ‘guess who’s coming to thanksgiving dinner’ and ‘patch game’, but they still differ from previous seasons because 1) his destruction is isolated to a forest far away from the city, and 2) his motive is still to impress wordgirl, but his methods are relatively tame. also he completely gives up on the secret identity thing??? i may have missed some things but i think he straight up tells her 'yeah there's no way you're wordgirl, lol' and the subject is just dropped for the rest of the show.

i also want to include 'the robot problem' here, because it's one of two season 6 tobey episodes, and follows the 'doesn't destroy buildings to get her attention' pattern: in fact, he teams up with her to try and stop someone else from going on a rampage (even if his reasons are selfish, lol).

and finally. the other season 6 episode. we have go gadget go, the bane of my time spent in the fandom. because GGG is the single episode where tobey truly manages to take away her autonomy, and proceeds to abuse that power for an extended period of time, for his own amusement. it's bad. it's Very Bad. put in the context that it's a white boy doing this to an (ambiguously) brown girl, it's REALLY REALLY BAD. and the more i look back on it, tbh, the more weirded out i am that the show not only made it seem like she wasn't affected at all within the episode, it just... forgot about it (which is not unusual for shows and especially children’s shows, but WG does make some efforts to either retain continuity or create canon reasons for why things are forgotten about). it's the kind of thing that you can't excuse and honestly you can't redeem (like at this point, you gotta ask yourself why you're spending so much effort trying to redeem this guy when becky has several other possible ships that are nowhere near this unhealthy - violet, scoops, honestly even victoria if you want another hero/villain ship, my absolute fave rarepair rose, etc).

so if you want to still ship it you have to just pretend that it never happened. (i remember trying for weeks to write something exploring the aftermath of this episode, to try and make myself feel better about it, but the more i wrote the more i realized just how traumatic this event should've been, so i eventually just dropped it.) and i brought up my own timeline of experiences earlier to point out that this episode aired eight whole years after the show started. which means that when i saw it, even though i was a huge stickler for canon at the time, i'd built up my own idea of the show and characters strongly enough to go 'yeah, no, this episode sucks and i am going to pretend that it doesn't exist'. and i think a lot of other people did too, because i really saw like... no one mention it, ever, except for some rogue fanfics over on ff dot net that already liked dynamics like that.

because here's the thing, and i don't know if people nowadays are aware of it? but i'm 80% sure (cannot find a source, so the other 20% is that it was just a rumor) that the show was originally supposed to end after season 6. and even if it's a rumor, it makes a ton of sense, because we get 1) an 'ending' to tobecky, which is a bad one, 2) a permanent wordgirl identity reveal that significantly changes one of the major dynamics in the show, 3) an episode where TJ gets to work with wordgirl and get a nice potential ending for their sibling dynamic, 4) an episode where we see Two-Brains explore life without his henchmen... the list goes on, and idk how many of these are just major stretches. but the point is. if the show had ended there, that would've been a pretty solid ending for many things, including their relationship: aka, it would prove that it was only ever heading somewhere bad, and when tobey finally has his moment of triumph, he is truly evil about it. and this provides us fans who HATE go gadget go with an easy reason to dismiss it - we can say that it was an attempt to conclude things in a way that wouldn't have happened if the writers had known they'd get more time. but despite that... it is still a canon episode.

it is odd to me how dramatically the dynamic shifts after that, though, because we seriously go from 'worst case ever, tobecky is toxic, your ship is dead' to 'no actually they get along and hang out and get ice cream together and tobey isn't even pressuring her into it, she's happy to go along with it :)' like, immediately. i never knew much about the show writers, so i don't know if the writers changed in between these seasons, but i would absolutely not be surprised if they did.

the earlier episodes are definitely problematic as well (though they pale in comparison to GGG) but i think everyone who ships it is aware considering that tobey is, yknow, a villain. from memory, he destroys buildings to get her attention, lies to her about the level of danger that people are in to trick her into spending more time with him, blackmails her into reading his poetry, and he creates a robot based on her that’s supposed to be devoted to him (but of course, all of these things backfire). not great stuff of course, but like... he’s a villain, that’s the point of his character. and considering that he’s a child these are things that can be redeemed, if done thoughtfully.

anyway, to sum up this section, the show starts off with a pretty standard 'enemies with an unrequited crush' setup, takes a really dark turn for a single episode, and then for the rest of the show takes their dynamic in a direction that makes it much, much easier to ship. as long as you ignore a lot of previous content.

wordbot: where's becky's autonomy in all of this? (misogyny)

we've finally gotten to the fandom. i recognize that a lot of this is going to come across as hypocritical considering how active i used to be re: this ship, but like... i'm a very different person now. anyway. disclaimer i guess - i don't write this to accuse all tobecky shippers of being like this - i know a lot of us aren't/weren't! but boy do i have things to point out, so without further ado:

it is very hard to ship this without allowing some bit of misogyny to slip into it. very, very hard. the entire premise of the ship involves a girl falling in love with a boy that repeatedly pressures her to date him via threats to the safety of herself and people she cares about, which... it's 2020, i shouldn't have to explain why that's terrible & a terrible example to set for children (which is why i am glad they never made it canon, tbh). best-case fan content has tobey stop pressuring her and start working to redeem himself out of an actual change of heart, which leads to becky seeing him in a new light. worst-case fan content treats his incessant pressuring and sometimes outright threats as something romantic - and even worse, romantic to the point where he deserves her attention and love as a reward for not giving up or whatever. i did see this pretty frequently for a while, especially in the earlier 2010s (didn't read much, Not My Thing At All), but i don't feel like going into detail here because of how obviously problematic it is. one medium (but still bad) case is where the fan content makes him start his redemption, but treats her liking him back as a reward for not knocking buildings over anymore. another not great case is where she tries to fix him with her love, which is a very common and very dangerous romantic trope. both are just... so incredibly unfair to her.

in content where she tries to 'fix him'... yeah i feel like it's really obvious how misogynistic that is. girls and women should not feel responsible for the evil actions of men, plain and simple. idk what else to say here i just really hate that trope and hated it back then and it just sucks! so can we not do that anymore, thanks.

in content that treats her like a reward for good behavior, there really isn't much of an explanation for what she sees in him. if she just goes 'oh wow, you're good now, i am going to fall in love with you for it' the whole thing falls flat because it makes NO sense whatsoever. we get to hear so much about tobey and his feelings and why he likes her and how he feels about it, but where is that energy for becky? why does she choose to trust him, to spend time around him, what does she enjoy about his presence? where is her getting over scoops in the process of falling for tobey? where is her telling her friends about this, confiding in them, asking them for advice? where is her choice in the matter?

win a day with wordgirl: do you guys even like becky or do you just like the idea of her (misogyny... 2!)

it was pretty standard for all fandoms the early-mid 2010s, but that's still not a good excuse for why so many tobecky fanfictions centered specifically around tobey's feelings while refusing to give becky the same level of empathy and nuance. it is true that to ship them comfortably you have to redeem him to some degree, which means spending time figuring him out and trying to find ways to pull him to the light without feeling super OOC. but ships take two people??? and there was so much potential for fanfics to explore becky's complex feelings on the matter - because she is! complex! she's heroic and kind but she's petty and has a competitive streak, she easily befriends villains but also doesn't trust them and doesn't believe they can ever really change, she's the savior of an entire planet but has feelings of inadequacy as her civilian identity and struggles with feeling like she can be successful without superpowers, she's great at the straightforward meanings and uses of words and loves reading but struggles to write passages that aren't dry as hell, it can be easily headcannoned that she's neurodivergent (special interests, issues with fitting in with her peers, taking things very literally, etc)... seriously there is SO MUCH to explore about her character, and a lot of it comes into play when you add tobey into the mix (literally ALL of the things i mentioned are explored at some point using tobey as a parallel or foil), but i rarely saw fanfiction that explored her thoughts on things further than 'he's evil but... maybe good?' or 'he's evil but... i kind of like him anyway?'.

if you want her to fall for him while being a villain, explore it!! why does she go against her morals? does she lie to herself about it to feel better? does she feel like she has to 'fix him' as part of her superhero duties to the city, and if so, how does that affect her as she tries and fails to help him? does she fall for him when she believes that he's turning good, only to feel betrayed when he starts acting worse because he feels like he can get away with it? it's such a shame that fanworks spend so little time even considering these questions, and it is absolutely a product of how deeply misogyny is/was baked into how we approach media (especially back then).

tobey goes good: but wait, i thought this show was progressive (a conclusion, i guess)

ifbrd wrote a great meta recently about how the show is a bit misogynist, despite being progressive in several ways. honestly i don't have much to add, but i'd really recommend reading through this; it makes a lot of great observations about the ways that male and female characters are presented differently through the show

i have little to add, so i'd just like to conclude with a reflection on the ship from my current viewpoint. i do think part of the reason so many of us latched onto the ship, despite how obviously problematic it was, is that the show treats a lot of things that would be serious in real life as normal or even comedic - which is fine lol, i'm not going to pretend that it's not a show for little kids, so they have to keep the tone light.

but if we, as teens/adults, decide to engage with this content in a more realistic manner, we have to be prepared to confront how messed up so many of the things going on really are. and if you still want to ship it, there's nothing inherently wrong with that! there's a lot of interesting things to explore in this ship, no matter what stage of enemies-to-friends-to-lovers you write them at, and it can be really helpful to have a space where you can explore a dynamic such as this in fiction. (speaking from experience here tbh, writing some fic for them helped me deal with complicated feelings about some ex-longtime friends.)

so to write this ship at all means that there are canon issues that you need to deal with if you want to have them end up in a healthy relationship in any manner that makes sense (unless you create an AU where none of that is applicable, which, power to you then). and i’m not saying ‘write them with a healthy endgame or you’re Bad’, not at all lol. but at least please, please take a step back once in a while to examine the dynamic that you’re writing, and please be careful about whether you mean to be romanticizing whatever behaviors you end up portraying as good.

[like-that-one-weird-dog-thing]

If I Could Burn This Down

[1] . . . [2] . . . [3] . . . [4] . . . [5] . . .

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Ok no, but I just have to rant on this. It’s been consuming my thoughts y’all, I just can’t stop thinking about it all.

So, this is about the Dream SMP- I recently got introduced to it through some friends and the animatics by SAD-ist were really what sold me to it. I’ve been trying to catch up on it all(god, it’s so good but also such a mess, I don’t think I’d have it any other way) and I just. So many thoughts y’all.

That ending tho, y’all that’s really what started this train of thought. It was so good. Like, I’ve seen quite a few posts on why it was predictable, not the unexpected twist Dream promised, and just. Not that good of an ending and honestly that’s a matter of opinion so I shouldn’t really care(and I don’t. much) but I still want to rant on the direct opposite side because fuck it I have thoughts!!!

obv spoilers for recent dream smp actions

tw for discussion of death in-universe and indirect discussion of suicidal ideation/possible intention

boi did I not think I’d add those tws to a post about a minecraft rp server of all things, but here I am

stay safe y’all

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This will mostly be on Willbur’s decent, for those wondering, because it’s just. there’s so many things to that ok. I just, this is just gonna be a ramble, just for me to get my thoughts out there.

So, I’ve seen a lot of things about Willbur- his decent into madness being the main thing. Mostly, it all seems to boil down to one thing- his desire for power and his view of Tommy being what led to him, well, blowing up L’manburg. But I personally don’t see that as the full story. Sure, it’s part of it, but it just feels incomplete to me. What would kickstart it? how would he go from adoring Tommy and only wanting L’manburg so that Tommy could be safe, to blowing it all up and betraying Tommy?

How could he go from that to doing the one thing that would hurt Tommy the most?

I personally think the answer is simple. Tommy said it in his recent stream, welcoming ConnerEatsPants to the server, after all. 

Trauma makes people vulnerable.

And Willbur has gone through a lot of trauma.

So, quite a bit of this depends on your view of how the world works. I don’t know if it’s ever been stated as cannon, but the deaths are specifically what I’m talking about.

They die so so much, after all. How does the work in-world? are they actually dying, and there’s a respawn function to the world(as in, it’s been a fact of life in-universe that you can die and come back) or do they just get injured, as a number of animatics/animations have chosen to depict it as? Are they being dragged back home by their comrades, fatally injured, just to heal?

Personally, I don’t see that likely as the in-universe explanation. They come back, after all. Come back and continue fighting, minutes after they’re killed. You can’t just use injuries as an excuse there, to explain it away.

So, I’ll follow this along with the ‘respawn exists’ assumption. Still, that brings up more questions. How did Willbur and JSchlatt permanently die, then? do you have to die in such a traumatizing way(your father killing you, all the people who may have once been your friends cornering you to kill you as your hopped up on drugs) that you no longer want to go back? That something deep inside you snaps and your connection to this world breaks, or is it something else? Does someone else pull the strings?

Is Dream the one, in-universe, to decide when you can respawn and when you die permanently? He’s closest thing to a god they have, after all, with access to creative mode and final say over the lands- the true ruler of the world. Is it him?

And still, there’s more questions. What is it like? How does it feel? is the corpse left there, or does it just disappear, leaving your stuff behind? maybe your body crumbles to dust, maybe it fades away before your eyes

Is dying just like Willbur described? Nothingness until you awake, only a taste of true death, a few seconds to experience it, to make you fear it? Is the pain all in the before, or do you feel in the after too, phantom aches and pains as you go about your life, the time you died a memory forever haunting you?

Does the end of your life hurt? Do you feel yourself being brought back to life? Does that hurt?

No matter what you decide, the fact of the matter is, it’s all still traumatizing. Being injured severely enough that you have to drop all your items and flee to heal up, or dying from those that you are always forced to interact with- it leaves a mark. Your left different than you were before. And other people can take advantage of this.

Who fed into all of Willbur’s manic thoughts, who fed into his idea that he was all alone? Him against the world, no one safe anymore. Who let him rot in those ideas?

Dream.

He did, afterall, give him the gunpowder for his eleven and a half stacks of tnt. He made a deal with him, that no matter what, even if he won, even if Willbur took L’manburg back, even if he became president and could make a safer place for them all, make a safer place for Tommy, even then.

The place would be blown sky. high.

He feeds into Willbur’s ideas, his thoughts, he eggs him on and pushes him forward(there is a traitor among you, one that you least expect). What if Dream was the one who ruined Willbur’s button, the first time? Trying to keep him tagging along, trying to drag him through the dirt to really show him, this is how it is, you are alone, no where is safe- no one is safe, everyone is against you. Dream is a sort of god, in the server. The land is his. He wouldn’t want L’manburg to stand, and he would want the one who had started it thoroughly against the rebuilding of it, before he had it destroyed. It would be a blow to morale, after all, for their leader to no longer believe in the dream that he’d once had. It would sow doubt, would make them think maybe, maybe it wasn’t a good idea, Willbur made it and he’s against it now.

They think he’s gone mad, true, but that doesn’t change that fact that Willbur started L’manburg. If the stress of it all was enough to make him lose it, couldn’t the others too?

Maybe it’s not worth it.

He destroyed it.

And here’s the thing, when Phil shows up?

It feels like a catalyst. A kick, a shove. Whatever you want to call it.

One last push by Dream, to force Willbur to do it. 

Before, it follows. Willbur rants, he panics, he shakes. He stresses over it all, stares at that damn button. He made a deal, but should he really do it?

Tommy tried to give him the Presidency, tried to give him the power, a sign of trust. Surely, if Tommy trusted him after all that he’s done to him...

Surely, he can back away. Not ruin it.

Right?

He hesitates.

Then Phil comes. His father. He tries to talk him out of it, tries to get him to see sense. But in the end?

He’s the one final thing that Willbur needed to see, before his resolve hardened. Before the ache settled solid and true.

(Phil is panicking, and Willbur sees it. 

He doesn’t trust him either, does he?)

Willbur is alone, and everyone is against him.

He hits the button.

See, the compound of events, the repeated deaths(injuries) he’s suffered all throughout his life, the war, they all add up. Whether death hurts or not doesn’t matter in the end, whether they’re dying or not doesn’t matter, because it all still hurts. The before hurts.

And you can only be hurt so many times before you can’t stand to be hurt anymore.

L’manburg caused Willbur so much hurt. The war, the suffering- it wouldn’t have happened without L’manburg.

All that was left for him was hurt, and all he wanted was for that hurt to leave.

With L’manburg in ruins behind him(he survived the blast, did he intend to? He never wore armor), Willbur demands for Phil to kill him. His father.

He doesn’t beg. He’s desperate, it’s obvious by the way he slams his fist down as he screams for it, but he doesn’t beg.

Instead, he eggs Phil on.

Just what Dream did to him.

He throws his arms towards L’manburg, shoves it into Phil’s face, makes him look.

Willbur did that. He is the cause. Phil should kill him, everyone wants him to.

It was just Willbur. Just Willbur, Willbur and all his hurt, just him against the world.

No one was on his side and he was alone.

Willbur works to anger Phil. Instead of begging for death he demands it and throws his sword at his father’s feet. He forces him to make a choice. Him or the world, because that was what it really was. 

Willbur was alone. Him against the world. Would Phil choose him?

Look at me, it seems to scream, look at me and what I’ve done, look at the hurt I’ve now caused.

Where do you stand?

In the end, even if later, Phil seems to be good friends with Techno(another traitor, the traitors Techno Phil, it’s Techno, Phil, it’s Techno and he’s got eight whithers ready to go, you better hurry, run along now, before it’s too late), even if he doesn’t want to...

He chooses the world.

Phil kills Willbur, and Willbur gets to escape the hurt.

Is that what he wanted all along? Is that were his madness stems? The hurt of a boy watching children fight in a war, the hurt of a boy watching what is basically his brother fight and die over and over and over again, all for an idea he’d had...

Is that where it begins? Or where it ends?

L’manburg, the start and the end?

L’manburg, his symphony of hope, with a finale of agony.

It’s a predictable ending, maybe, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t fit. Techno may have been obvious, but that doesn’t mean there might not have been hope for otherwise, hope for a better future, hope for him to change his mind and hope for his affection for them to overrule his opinions and values of government.

I wonder, did Tommy ever see Techno and think of Willbur?

Did Willbur ever see Techno and think of Tommy?

Two siblings, seeing something that could have been(Tommy, lets be the bad guys) and something that will never be(Willbur, do you hear yourself?)

I wonder, did Willbur ever even give real thought to how the destruction of L’manburg would hurt Tommy? Did he?

Or was he too wrapped up in his thoughts, his own pain. Too wrapped up in the thoughts fed by Dream and the ideas burning through his skin.(the button might not even work -do you want to risk that?) 

Through it all, did he think?

And this is not to say that Willbur is absolved of his guilt, of the crimes he has committed. He giggles about Techno killing Tubbo, he pushes for Tommy and Techno to fight in a pit, where Tommy is almost certainly going to die(another death added to hundreds of tallies), and he laughs as they fight.

(It stays in the pit)

He is not innocent. Explainations for his actions don’t erase those actions. It does, however bring even more questions into the mix.

The Pit.

Techno and Willbur’s views on Tubbo’s death(I was peer pressured), Tommy’s refusal to accept that then accepting his own death at Techno’s hands.

Has it become trivial to Willbur and Techno? An expectation to Tommy? Is Tubbo really unfazed, or hiding any emotions over his death? Do you choose to believe he died, or that he was injured to near death by Techno? Which is worse? If death is nothingness, the pain of before gone, washed away, than isn’t it better to die then to be injured? Is Tommy upset about Tubbo learning once more what death is, dealing with the pain of the before, or is he mad that Techno didn’t finish the job and let Tubbo be healed instead of respawned?

Did he die, or just get injured?

Another thought on the broken button, was it Dream, or was it Willbur? Willbur, doing one last thing to try and cling to him life before.(surely, if he broke the button, the urge to run to it would leave him?) Did he ever regret it, when he finally did push it? I don’t think so

His ghost.

Is it the escape he wanted? Did he want to forget it all, everything that led to hurt and was hurt? Is his description of death just what he wanted- wished- it to be? Would it be different for someone else? Does he hate it? Crave to go back to it, to leave the wandering of the world he’s left behind? He’s said he’s wanted to come back to life- does he miss it? Can he feel any of it? The sunlight, the air around him, any of it? Or does the nothingness stick? Is that all he feels?

Does it ache, worse than living ever did?

.

.

.

[cadomoisspokenfor]

Ya know thinking about it, maybe there’s nothing more to Syds weird amount of trust for Farouk than gullibleness and pride.

There seemed to be a pattern of her not really internalizing the severity of Farouks crimes, she mostly just thought of him as an “asshole” throughout all the seasons and not someone doing deep long lasting damage to the people around her.

In chap 11 when they find the music box David ask what it is she says, “Nothing just your asshole parasite messing with my head.”

As if its Davids fault Farouks evil, or as if Farouks only a David problem, and not ya know, an extremely powerful supervillain bent on world domination.

I’m trying to figure out what Syds perception of Farouk was, so lets look at their major interactions.

1. Discovers his existence, chap 5. She was wondering what the problem in her and Davids relationship was and now she has someone to blame. I’ll point out, it’s likely she was only thinking of Farouk as an obstacle in the way of her and Davids relationship, and not as a horrifying abuser who’s had a chokehold on David for his entire life. Now the “mission” is clear, snip Farouk outta Davids head, everything’ll be perfect.

2. David and Amys childhood home, also chap 5. Farouk jump-scares them a few times. And I think as far as Syds concerned, that’s a cheap trick. She sheds a tear but then puts on a brave face and keeps moving. Just a horror show after all. None of it “real”. But then Lenny actually jumps out and attacks her, telepathically ties her up then starts grotesquely kissing David while he’s unconscious. And the way she talks, I think Syd internalizes Lenny as being like... a jealous ex. The kissing, the “you stole my man” type language. Man, this relationship obstacle just won’t get out the way. And then...

3. Mental Clockworks, chap 5-7. In the white room Farouk reveals his true form and chases Syd down which scares the shit outta her. But, important note, he doesn’t actually touch her before the delusion is put in place. It’s still very much not real.

Anyways, what’s a horrifying display of control and power for everyone else worked a bit differently for Syd. She was the only one who noticed anything was off. And she couldn’t place it for a while, which worried her, and she eventually gets incapacitated by Lenny. But then, she’s woken up by Cary who takes her into a phone booth and tries to update her on what’s happening, only she’s already figured it out. I’ll point this out as a moment of overconfidence, she’s visibly proud that she was able to see through the illusion. She’s not like the others, she’s a hero archetype. And being that means when Cary hands her the glasses and tells her to go save the others she’s super confident in her ability to do so. She’s the hero after all. And when she does put on the glasses she remarks, “She thought it’d be more interesting.” She’s actively downplaying this nightmare. I don’t hold it against her but my point in saying all this is that it comes back later. This is another instance of her thinking Farouk’s “Not that big a deal.” Underestimating his abilities. I mean, she saw through it after all, she could probably do it again if she needed too... right?

To summarize 3, Syd sees herself as the hero who saw through Farouks cheap illusion. She feels stronger than Farouk here, like he couldn’t hurt her (really hurt her I mean) even if he tried. And in that, she can’t relate to the others who treat it like a big deal or like a traumatizing moment in their adventure. It was just a standard hero vs villain fight to her. Really hope the points getting across cause this’ll come up later.

4. White room, chap 8. Another interaction with Lenny only this time she’s on the ropes, looking a lot worse for ware. Syds not scared of her anymore, or so she tells herself at least. She saw through Farouks tricks. She can do it again if she has too. Nothings gonna get in the way of her and Davids happily ever after. Except Lenny has a good point... she’s still inside David. Still attached to his mind. She could explode his brain if they try to rip her out forcefully. And David can’t handle himself against Farouk, Syd knows this. Cause Davids never won against Farouk up to this point. Getting out of Mental Clockworks was a team effort from her, Melanie, Cary, and Oliver. If it hadn’t been for the crown they wouldn’t’ve gotten out of their. Syds role in this was to keep Kerry and Rudy safe until Cary could complete his end of the plan. And she did. But David was helpless in that, as far she knows. So she, the hero, needs to do something. Just sitting around isn’t good enough. So... she switches with David again. Using a true loves kiss too, a truly fairy tale worthy action, one for the books.

She’s fully possessed now, completely outta control of her own body, but Farouk only used her to get Kerry. It’s a very short moment for Syd, she might not even remember it. When she wakes up she says, “Did we win?” She honestly might’ve just blacked out after the kiss. Because they’re not telepaths their minds are probably much easier to push to the side than Davids. She might not’ve really... experienced the possession is what I’m getting at. And she’s once again most concerned with David.

D: “You should not have done that, as much as I like kissing you.”

S: “It would’ve killed you.” She says that last line not in a concerned way, but in a playful-ish way. As if to say “Obviously I saved you. I’d destroy the world myself if it meant saving you.”

Ya know what, I’ll point out here also that David once again failed to beat Farouk. Syd managed to get Farouk out of his mind but David still couldn’t stop him in the real world.

5. Plaque, chap 9. As explained in show, Syds been part of the team hunting down Farouk and trying to stop him from finding his body. Before chap 12 she and everyone else is under the impression that Farouk is the source of the “maze virus”. A psychological plaque that freezes everyone in their tracks and causes them to chatter their teeth. Disturbing, but... just based on other stuff we know about the character... she probably doesn’t care that much. Her main focus is probably still David. And when David comes back, she immediately blames him for disappearing. Her context here being that he was found in the club they followed Farouk to, next to a bunch of teeth chatterers mumbling, “Help them. Their in the maze.” Clearly, he’s been somewhat involved with the events of the past year, so why hasn’t he contacted her? Why hasn’t he included her in it? Why’d he abandon her? He says he doesn’t remember anything? Ptonomy says otherwise. Clearly he remembers something. He’s keeping secrets. She gets why from the others, but why from her? They’re supposed to be a team. And he abandoned her, to go clubbing with Farouk or whatever it is that he was doing their.

6. Music box, chap 10. Davids back. Maybe she can just pretend things are normal. He leads them to the middle of nowhere and they find her old music box. Farouk. That asshole. His little jump scares and memory tricks won’t get to her. He can’t hurt her, remember? This is all he can do. Illusions, trick. And she’ll see right through them every time. Besides, was reminding her of her childhood really the best he can do? Yeah she’s got a childhood, so does everyone. She’s over it already. (I’m starting to type more and more in Syds perspective.)

6.5 Syd the illusion breaker gets caught in the maze, chap 12. Only... she’s out of it before David even enters her mind to save her. She sees that he’s there, doesn’t know why, but decides to use this as an opportunity to teach him a lesson. We all know the lesson though. The headline in this particular case is, “David never saved Syd from her maze.” He never even saw it. She doesn’t know what he’s talking about when she mentions it. He entered her mind but she’s the one in full control. Scary good control even, props to her. The lesson she’s trying to teach him is sort of... her own thought process on heroism. “Love can’t save us, it’s what we have to save.” Up to this point “love” is all Syds been fighting for. It’s been the driving force behind her heroism. She’s done some messed up things in her past, sure, but all her problems only made her stronger. They made her the “truth seer” she is today. They led her to David, the best thing that’s ever happened to her. No villain can hurt her more than she’s hurt herself. This all... obviously doesn’t translate perfectly to David. That’s just... not been his experience.

(Skippable David Tangent) Farouk hurt David the most that any one person could. And David couldn’t hurt himself more even if he tried. And all Davids pain hasn’t made him mentally stronger, less gullible, or less sensitive. The opposite in fact. Davids minds been split, unbeknownst to Syd. He’s in a constant state of confusion. He keeps getting tugged around by friends and enemies and doesn’t know what to do about it. Davids pain hasn’t shielded him at all, just caused him more strife. He’s even still being manipulated by his abuser. The survivor story just doesn’t work on him, at the moment at least. As far as Davids concerned his “strength” comes from his powers, and he didn’t get a choice in those either. Syd doesn’t see any of this, she’s not a telepath. She hopes her story will help him but... it really only applies to her. Back into her perspective though,

7. Lenny’s back, chap 15. I know this isn’t a Farouk interaction but it is sorta important. Davids not listening to her. She’s trying to remind him of the mission, trying to keep him focused, but clearly it’s not working. Losing his sister really affected him. She understands sure, but he won’t even talk to her about it. Love is what’s supposed to be used to help each other through these dark times, to make sure people don’t feel alone. But he’s isolating himself from her. He isn’t “saving love” he’s pushing it away. That’s not what heroes are supposed to do. Farouk is once again in the way of their love. She can’t blame David, and she knows it’s not her fault, so Farouk.

But the headline there is she’s downplaying his sisters death. As if it’s just another trick to mess with him, an obstacle to be hurdled over. Like the music box thing. But... his sister died. In fact... Lenny was more immediately comforting to him about it than either of the Syds were.

Syd still isn’t internalizing the pain Farouks causing to others. All she’s internalized is her own wins against him and the fact that he’s never permanently damaged her specifically. Or so she says. He’s still just a ghost in a haunted house.

8. Lenny talk, chap 16. Syd comes over to gloat. She sees through Farouks trick. Lenny’s not gonna frazzle her, or David. She’s just another obstacle to their happiness. Only Lenny drops a hard truth on her. And Syd doesn’t seem to want to hear it. She’s stunned at. Tbh... I think she walks away deciding not to believe her. It must be another trick. She just said that to mess with her (again, Syds thoughts). She really really wants to continue thinking of Farouk as “just some asshole” who they need to work with and/or defeat so her and David can finally have their happy ever after. At this point, if she actually started thinking of Farouk as dangerous to her, as a major threat, it’d feel like giving him power. The power of fear, over her. She refuses to be afraid of Farouk, cause she knows that’s how he tricks people. That’s how he controls them. So she doesn’t listen to Lenny. She resolves to continue downplaying Farouks crimes. A dog barking in peoples ears.

9. The cave, chap 18. In between this and the last one David left her again. He really doesn’t get what “saving love” means. But she dedicates herself to him again. If he won’t save love, she will. She’s a hero after all. She’s beaten Farouk in the past and she’ll beat him again if she has too. And then... the cave. Incorporating what another fan has said, even if Syd does pic up on Melanie being Farouk, she knows her future self wanted to work with him for some reason. He was the key to saving the world. He may be a house haunting asshole, but if he saves the world, then there’s gotta be something more to him... right? Melanie complains about Oliver some more, she’s over it. But then Melanie starts showing Syd images. Syd doesn’t know how she’s doing that, but some of the images are from very private personal moments. And they’re all centered on David. These must be memories. Both her and Davids. How Melanie is doing this can go on the back-burner for now, what is she trying to tell her with these? That Davids crazy? No, Farouk’s the one who was behind all these things. Davids “her man.” Her one true love. The problem in their relationship has always been Farouk.

But then... there are all those moments after she got Farouk out of his head. Him keeping secrets. Him not confiding in her, or being there for her. Him constantly leaving her behind. That’s not how love’s supposed to work. A psychopath? Well, when you say that... and you show these images on the screen... and you show him torturing Oliver ( a victim) to get to Syd. And enjoying it, almost like he just wanted the excuse to go all out. Like it’s not really about saving Syd. Or love for that matter. Syd maybe admits to herself at this point that Davids fairly unhinged. He’s had a rough childhood though, there were bound to be some sharp edges here and there. He tortures Oliver for a long time though. And it really starts to feel like he just likes doing it, not that he’s doing it cause it’s “necessary”. It doesn’t even work.

And then... Melanie shows her Future Syd. She matches the description David gave her. And there’s David, in those same pajamas he wears. And... he’s kissing FS. He didn’t tell her about that. It’s not cheating cause it’s her future self. But... they talked about this. David was the one to say it might feel weird. Why not tell her? Why keep that a secret. Even if it’s not cheating, it certainly feels like it. It’s a huge betrayal. And he doesn’t have Farouk as an excuse. Davids just... a bad person. She’s starting to piece together the point of all this. “Legion, The World Killer” yada yada.

David hasn’t been loyal to her. He hasn’t saved loved, he’s not going to save love. The path he’s on is dark and selfish. Could he destroy the world? They’ve known he could since season 1. They never thought he’d actually do it. But wait no, you can’t give up on love that easily. He’s a good person. And then Melanie shows it all again. And she shows him kissing Lenny. And she shows FS telling Farouk about David. And Syd can’t help but concede. Davids too far gone. Farouk may be an asshole, but David lied about everything. He lied to Syd. Again, Davids not going to save love, he missed the mark on that. Davids going to end the world.

Very important to point out here, as I’ve tried to build it up, Syds internalized herself as a hero who doesn’t let anything get to her. Farouk can’t hurt her with his illusions and tricks. She’s seen through them before and she’ll do it again. But David betraying her? Keeping secrets? Playing with her heart? That hurts more than anything Farouks done to her. She invested in David. She was on his side no matter what, but he wasn’t on her side. So if FS says Davids evil and has gotta go, than she’ll believe her. He’s gotta go.

All of this hopefully explains my theory on Syds specific moment-to-moment reasoning thoroughly

I also wanna say though, if I’m right this makes Syds moment on the mountain make more sense. All the specific unexplained discrepancies.

She says she knows it was Farouk who showed her all that. Because she doesn’t perceive Farouk as that big of a threat and again, as mostly a house haunter. Those were clearly memories, she doesn’t care that the infos coming from him, and she believes she can tell the difference between an illusion and something real. so Davids gotta answer for that.

She gets a detail wrong, she says “He went to see her, after you quit.” But we all know he saw her before David quit and specifically set him up. Syd doesn’t know David specifically broke their rules after they set them. She thinks he kissed her beforehand and didn’t tell her for whatever reason.

And again, she doesn’t fully understand what everyone around hers been through. Hence, “The son of sam” thing. To her, Farouk maybe evil, but you can see through his tricks if you just try hard enough. Even though he possessed her she didn’t really register it happening. At a certain point the things you do when he’s in your head are on you (says Syd).

Oh, and also majorly, the “Farouk, your enemy” thing. She never really care about him all that much. He was just an obstacle. David was the one who had a weird complex about him.

Tl;dr Syd doesn’t view Farouk as much of a threat. She doesn’t register or internalize the pain he’s causing to the others cause he’s not doing any of it to her. Syds main focus is David and when she realizes what Farouk’s showing her are memories, and that David’s betrayed her and isn’t planning on “saving love”, that hurts her more than anything Farouks done. Thus, she turns.

[rosethornewrites]

Fic: this body yet survives, ch. 8

Relationship: Lán Zhàn | Lán Wàngjī/Wèi Yīng | Wèi Wúxiàn

Characters: Lán Zhàn | Lán Wàngjī, Lán Huàn | Lán Xīchén, Lán Qǐrén, Wèi Yīng | Wèi Wúxiàn, Jiāng Chéng | Jiāng Wǎnyín, Jiāng Yànlí, Su She | Su Minshan, Madam Jin, Jin Zixuan, Wen Qing

Tags: No War AU, Recovery, Trauma, Dissociation, Courtship, Courting Rituals, Near Death Experiences, Attempted Murder, Eventual Happy Ending, Panic Attacks, Vomiting, Siblings, Protective Siblings, Soup, Triggers, Protective Lan WangJi, Protective Lán Qǐrén, Yúnmèng Siblings Dynamics, Bad Parent Yú Zǐyuān, POV Third Person, POV Lan WangJi

Summary: Lan Qiren wakes them to let them know of Wen Qing's arrival and her desire to ensure Wei Wuxian's meridians are healing.

Notes: See end.

Warnings: Reference to poisoning, infanticide, assassination, and chronic illness in this chapter.

Parts 1 & 2

Chapter 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7

AO3 link

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Wangji woke, warm and comfortable, to the sound of shufu’s throat clearing, and sat up to find he had fallen asleep with Wei Ying curled close, both the Jiang siblings also asleep, Jiang Wanyin curled at the foot of the bed, Jiang Yanli seated on a chair, but with her upper body on the bed, one arm around Wei Ying.

He had the wherewithal to be careful extricating himself from Wei Ying so as not to disturb his much-needed sleep, and stood to bow to his uncle.

“Shufu, Wangji apologizes for his conduct.”

“No need,” Lan Qiren replied, looking uncomfortable. “Last night was fraught for you all.”

Jiang Wanyin was the next to stir at the conversation, and he also greeted shufu politely before moving to gently wake Jiang Yanli.

“Wen-zongzhu has arrived,” Lan Qiren informed them. “His niece would like to assess Wei Wuxian’s recovery. I did not… inform them of the stress that he has faced.”

“The healer said his meridians seemed unharmed,” Wangji said, troubled.

Shufu favored him with a gentle look, one likely meant to calm, but it raised his anxiety over Wei Ying’s condition.

“Likely they are correct,” he said. “But Wen Qing is the foremost medical cultivator and would be able to assess him with more expertise.”

Wangji felt frozen, uncertain as to whether he should wake Wei Ying, but Jiang Yanli decided the matter for him. She murmured softly to him, tousled his hair gently, easing it out of the braid she’d put it in the night before.

Wei Ying looked beautifully disheveled when he did sit up, eyes half-lidded as he murmured questioningly at his sworn sister, his words barely recognizable—something unsurprising after the late night.

When he saw shufu, he jerked awake more fully, attempting a bow that unbalanced him and would have sent him off the bed, had Jiang Wanyin not grabbed his arm.

“None of that, Wei Wuxian. Wen-daifu wishes to check on your progress while her uncle discusses trade matters with myself and Xichen. Aside from that, a day of rest is in order for you all. We are investigating matters.”

“Lan-xiansheng, do you know if Wen Ning came with?” Wei Ying asked, sounding hesitant. 

Though Wei Ying had befriended him at the competition at Nightless City, Wangji knew he hadn’t been able to see the boy since, with Wen Qionglin’s weak constitution. They had exchanged letters, prior to the incident at the Lotus Pier discussion conference. Wei Ying had not written, or at least sent, letters since his arrival at the Cloud Recesses, though.

“He was not fit to travel,” shufu told him softly. “But you can ask after him with Wen-daifu.”

Wei Ying nodded, disappointed. 

Shufu excused himself to see to Wen-zongzhu, letting them know Wen Qing would be by shortly. 

Wen Qionglin’s illness was well-known, the injury suffered when Wen-furen and her newborn, Wen Chao, were poisoned. Their firstborn, Wen Xu, had died under mysterious circumstances that had also left Wen-furen weak to the point of often being bedridden, and so Wen-zongzhu had called upon his cousins in a medical branch of the clan to attend her second pregnancy personally. 

As it had turned out, the firstborn had been murdered, Wen-furen’s illness the result of poison. Unfortunately, it was only discovered when Wen-furen, her newborn, and Wen Qionglin and Wen Qing’s parents were dead, little Wen Qionglin, barely a toddler at the time, himself poisoned. Wen Qing had been lucky, at a lesson at the time and thus untouched. 

It had obviously been foul play, and an investigation revealed that a secondary branch of the family had been behind it, seeking to usurp the sect leader through assassinating his heirs in infancy. 

After having the ringleaders executed for high treason, Wen Ruohan had exiled every man, woman, and child from that branch of the clan to Dongying. It had been considered mercy, as he could have instead determined justice could only be served through miezu. He had announced that he did not believe justice would be served by executing or enslaving children for the non-crime of being born to a family and did not believe creating more orphans by executing only the adults would be just, either. The alternative of exile had been graciously accepted by the secondary branch. 

He had never remarried, nor sought to have more children, instead taking the orphaned Wen Qing and Wen Qionglin into his household, naming the former his heir and ensuring her sibling received the best care available.

Wen Qionglin’s illness left him often bedridden and weak like his aunt had been, though he was quite kind and soft-spoken, and painfully shy. Wei Ying had met him on a rare day when he was feeling better and practicing archery, having gotten lost in the area around the tournament. He had given him tips and encouraged him to enter the tournament, at least to show his skill in the segment that involved stationary targets.

With his coaxing, the boy had scored several bullseyes in front of the crowd, increasing his standing among his peers despite his illness. Where previously the cultivation world had looked upon Wen Qionglin with pity, it was now impressed that someone with such a difficult chronic illness had become an accomplished archer. 

“I am sure Wen Qionglin would enjoy hearing from you again,” Wangji said softly. “Perhaps his sister can bring him a letter if you wish to write him before she leaves.”

Wei Ying nodded again, frowning slightly. 

“I’ve been a terrible friend.”

“Don’t be an idiot, Wei Wuxian,” someone said from the hallway, and Wen Qing entered the room a moment later. “You’ve been ill. A-Ning understands.”

That elicited a deeper frown from Wei Ying.

“I haven’t been sick,” he objected. 

Wen Qing snorted. 

“Maybe not physically, but I’ve been receiving regular updates from the healers here. You suffered a traumatic event, and it injured your mind. Illness comes in different forms.”

Wei Ying looked away, frowning—it seemed he hadn’t considered his struggles an illness, despite being treated by healers in the Cloud Recesses.

“Honestly, Wei Wuxian… A-Ning really understands. He misses your letters, but Lan-zongzhu and the healers have kept me apprised, so he knows you’ve had difficulty. Stop being so fucking hard on yourself.”

If Wangji hadn’t met her at several points during his life, her profanity might have surprised him, but instead he was simply glad it made Wei Ying smile.

“Ah, Wen Qing, your bedside manner is refreshing,” he said lightly, and she rolled her eyes in an exaggerated fashion.

“I overheard that there have been… issues,” she said after a moment.

Wei Ying’s jaw clenched, a slight tremor running through him at the reminder.

“Some asshole put lotuses in his quarters, and then ours,” Jiang Wanyin supplied. “On purpose.”

“That’s why A-Xian is in the infirmary,” Jiang Yanli added softly. “He was ill when he saw them.”

“And smelled them,” Wei Ying said, his voice catching.

“The healers were concerned about his meridians and… the possibility of qi deviation,” Wangji said, nearly choking on the last part.

He kept his eyes on Wei Ying so as to stave off the image of him bleeding from his eyes and nose and ears and mouth in the mud.

Wen Qing looked almost murderous for a brief moment before her face smoothed.

“They induced a flashback, I’m assuming, to what occurred,” she said, somehow managing to keep her voice level and calm. “Not surprising.”

“Seeing lotuses on clothing and ornaments, and in food, too,” Jiang Yanli offered. “A-Cheng intends to go through Wei Ying’s belongings to remove anything including the lotus.”

“A-Jie and I ordered clothing from Caiyi to be delivered when it’s complete, so he won’t have to see lotuses on our robes.”

Wei Ying looked surprised, gratitude and denial warring on his face. His eyes flitted to Jiang Wanyin’s crown, and Wangji’s followed. Instead of his typical silver lotus with amethyst stones that announced his station as Jiang sect heir, he was now wearing a simple unadorned jade guan. Jiang Yanli, who typically wore a lotus hairpin, had replaced it with a golden peony, clearly a courting gift from Jin Zixuan.

“You didn’t have to, A-Cheng. It’s stupid, just—”

“Is your fear of dogs stupid?” Wen Qing cut in brusquely. 

He flinched, and her voice gentled. She sat beside the bed in the chair vacated by Jiang Yanli. 

“Wei Wuxian, you’ve been through a trauma, just as you were when you were on the streets after your parents died. It’s not stupid. It’s your brain seeking to protect you.”

“But they’re just flowers,” Wei Wuxian muttered. 

“They remind you of fighting for your life, just as dogs do,” she said. “It’s a natural survival response, whether it’s rational or not.”

Wei Ying looked frustrated but nodded. 

“I know you hate it,” Wen Qing told him. “Maybe it’s a trauma that can be worked through. Same with dogs. The mind healers can help you when you’re ready, but it’s not easy work.”

She reached forward slowly and patted his shoulder, clearly giving him time to acclimate. Wangji knew he also hated that he sometimes panicked if he was touched without warning, as well. They all wished it was easy for him to go back to being relatively carefree. 

“I don’t need to use my needles to check your meridians for any disruption or damage,” Wen Qing said, breaking an uncomfortable silence that had fallen among them. “I may need to if you need treatment, but I’ll let you know, okay?”

Wei Ying simply nodded again in acknowledgement, and Wangji realized with a little bit of horror that he had grown accustomed to his quiet. He longed for the chatter and noise that had once accompanied him, but he had spent so much time locked in his own head in the last year, it would probably take more to break him of the habit. 

“Lie back and relax,” she ordered gently. “And tell me what you’ve been up to of late, so I can let A-Ning know.”

Once Wei Ying was situated, he spoke hesitantly, starting with Wangji writing him a song and feeling like a fog had lifted.

“I don’t really remember a lot before that,” he said. “It was like I was under… underwater.”

His voice broke at the word a little, as though he realized the implication of that word after what he’d suffered at the hands of Madam Yu, and Wen Qing’s movement checking his meridians hesitated slightly before she continued.  

At first it was just information, but by the time he reached their outing to Caiyi, the details were leaking in to make it a story. The purchase of Tang became a rescue, with perhaps unconscious undertones of Wei Ying’s own—unconscious because he didn’t seem aware of it, though the Jiang siblings exchanged heavy looks. 

He largely skimmed meeting Madam Jin, only commenting that she wanted to let him know she had dissolved her sworn sisterhood. He was taking her request for confidentiality seriously—Wangji didn’t know if he had told his siblings, even, though it was possible Jiang Yanli knew from Jin Zixuan. 

Wen Qing finished her examination before he was finished, but let him keep going, smiling when she learned of their betrothal, of his ribbon, of the swearing of brotherhood to make true in the eyes of the cultivation world what was already true in the hearts of Jiang Wanyin, Jiang Yanli, and Wei Ying. 

She sobered when he recounted returning to his rooms after having his sister’s newly-reformulated soup, and finding the lotuses inside. 

“And then A-Cheng went to their quarters later,” Wei Ying started, then stopped, his jaw tightening, his breathing quickened with distress.

“I heard what occurred,” Wen Qing said softly. “You have many people who wish to protect you, Wei Wuxian. Let them.”

“Is he… are his meridians okay?” Jiang Yanli asked, the words bursting from her as though she was no longer able to wait. 

Wen Qing nodded. 

“His pathways and meridians are much better than they were last I examined them. There is no lasting damage.”

The last time she had examined him had been shortly before they had undocked from Lotus Pier on the way to Gusu, but she was careful in her wording. 

“You had a panic attack last night,” she added. “Obviously staying calm and feeling safe is important moving forward, but your meridians and qi were not disrupted.”

“Thank you,” Wei Ying murmured. 

“Take it easy today, though. Doctor’s orders. You didn’t have a qi deviation, but panic attacks take a lot out of you.”

“I—I should greet Wen-zongzhu and thank him, though,” Wei Ying said as he sat up, sounding stressed at the very idea. 

Wen Qing snorted. 

“Nope. You don’t need the stress of having to greet anyone—you’ve had enough of that lately. My uncle understands, and you’re not expected to do anything but focus on your recovery.”

When he looked like he might argue she frowned at him. 

“Wei Wuxian, you aren’t to concern yourself with whatever idea of propriety you’ve got in your head you need to observe. It’s largely a bunch of bullshit, anyway. If you want to do anything, take a bit of time and write A-Ning a letter. He really wished he could come see you.”

That got a little smile from Wei Ying, likely happy that his friend wanted to hear from him. Wangji resolved to let him use his desk in the jingshi if he was uncomfortable returning to his quarters yet—chaperoned, of course.

“You need to return to a healthier weight,” Wen Qing said as she left. “I’ll arrange for breakfast to be sent.”

They took turns behind the screen dressing in the clothing retrieved the night before. Jiang Yanli insisted on combing Wei Ying’s hair, refreshing the citrus scent in it, before she tied his ribbon and arranged his crown with the gentian guan, his red ribbon, and the jade plum blossom hairstick.

The delivery of breakfast was accompanied by Jin Zixuan, who had brought his own tray to join them, and he was welcomed without fanfare in a way that implied he’d been accepted by Jiang Wanyin and Wei Ying. Likely, his honorable and kind conduct yesterday at both the banquet and after the lotus incident had helped matters.

Wangji hoped the day would be quieter and less stressful than the preceding one.

----------

灭族 (mièzú) is “family extermination” and was used as a collective punishment. There’s a lot of interesting meta on this in the fandom, regarding the extermination of the Wens not as genocide, but as an idea of retributive justice. There’s a wikipedia page on the nine familial exterminations; the children under a certain age would usually have been enslaved rather than killed, but not always (like, it isn’t light reading). There have been similar ideas of collective punishment in some Western cultures, as well. Famously, the Nazis used Sippenhaft.

I wanted to explore what might have prevented Wen Ruohan from becoming a megalomaniac at least briefly, and decided on this scenario. Tragedy changed him. I’m largely going with novel canon for this (not that it really matters since it’s a no war AU).

[oliviareviewsnasu]

Olivia Reads Fate/Stay Night ~Fate~ Route (Blind Readthrough) Part 1: Intro Sequence and Rin!

Before we begin with this readthrough I'd like to personally thank anyone and everyone who has come here to listen (or read I suppose) my maddened ramblings. You truly make it worth it. Now on to the readthrough. Intro Sequence By now this intro scene is engrained even into my mind and there’s not really much to say about it. As this is a blind review however here’s a basic summary of the events: Shirou, in a state of desperation, summons perhaps one of the most famous characters in the franchise to fend off an unknown attacker. The King of Knights stands before him and asks the iconic line: “I ask of you, are you my master?”. She then states that their fates (heh) are now entwined before the scene fades to white leading into the Rin prologue. On the more technical end; the music in the Realta Nua version is phenomenal. as is Ayako Kasumi’s performance as Saber even this early on in what would be a long career

What I think the anime (Unlimited Blade Works in particular) doesn’t quite convey is Shirou’s mystique and awe in the face of the King of Knights, nor his poetic heart. He’s clearly much much more intelligent and thoughtful than quite a few people give him credit for.

By all accounts this is true in a both a literal and meta-sense. 17 years later people are still discussing the franchise with nearly the same vigor as larger properties like One Piece or Dragon Ball. As for the literal, well, we all know Shirou’s dark fate. On the topic of darkness, I love how they portray Arturia. Awash in the light of the moon while Shirou is cowering in the dark. The contrast is beautiful and highlights just how important of a role she’d play in the would-be-hero’s future. What I find to be fascinating is how much imagery is loaded into these first few moments. That, coupled with Shirou’s prose, makes for a gorgeous introduction. My only issue with it is the whiplash bait-and-switch from Shirou’s perspective to Rin’s; especially with the knowledge that we’ll need to essentially re-read that part to begin with. It weakens some of the dramatic tension and choreography. Prologue: Day 1 (Part 1) And so the Rin prologue begins, in bed, with traumatic memories and regrets. So an ordinary morning for this reviewer. It’s also the first mention of the Holy Grail War that took place during the events of Fate/Zero. Rin’s final memories of her father do pull at my heart-strings however. Wanting to make someone laugh before you see them off is, in my opinion, a noble pursuit. Given what I know of Tokiomi from the events of Fate/Zero I can also agree that his character was perhaps one of the finer among the mages. At least compared to Kiritsugu “Sign a magical contract, can’t shoot, hire someone else to first for me” Emiya, Kirei “My religious views make my sadism and hedonism weird for me” Kotomine, and Lord El Melloi “Old Money, Old Magecraft” Archibald. Sound wise I’ve been listening to the flashback music for nearly ten minutes as I’ve been writing this up and I’m starting to see stars so we should probably move along- And so the Rin proloAnd so the Rin prologue begins, in bed, with traumatic memories and regrets. So an ordinary morning for this reviewer. It’s also the first mention of the Holy Grail War that took place during the events of Fate/Zero. Rin’s final memories of her father do pull at my heart-strings however. Wanting to make someone laugh before you see them off is, in my opinion, a noble pursuit. Given what I know of Tokiomi from the events of Fate/Zero I can also agree that his character was perhaps one of the finer among the mages. At least compared to Kiritsugu “Sign a magical contract, can’t shoot, hire someone else to first for me” Emiya, Kirei “My religious views make my sadism and hedonism weird for me” Kotomine, and Lord El Melloi “Old Money, Old Magecraft” Archibald. Sound wise I’ve been listening to the flashback music for nearly ten minutes as I’ve been writing this up and I’m starting to see stars so we should probably move along-gue begins, in bed, with traumatic memories and regrets. So an ordinary morning for this reviewer. It’s also the first mention of the Holy Grail War that took place during the events of Fate/Zero. Rin’s final memories of her father do pull at my heart-strings however. Wanting to make someone laugh before you see them off is, in my opinion, a noble pursuit. Given what I know of Tokiomi from the events of Fate/Zero I can also agree that his character was perhaps one of the finer among the mages. At least compared to Kiritsugu “Sign a magical contract, can’t shoot, hire someone else to first for me” Emiya, Kirei “My religious views make my sadism and hedonism weird for me” Kotomine, and Lord El Melloi “Old Money, Old Magecraft” Archibald. Sound wise I’ve been listening to the flashback music for nearly ten minutes as I’ve been writing this up and I’m starting to see stars so we should probably move along-

-Only for the lovely siren song of the world’s most annoying alarm clock to start ringing.

I agree with you there Rin, I feel like I’m being attacked as well. Terrible assault on the ears aside, we learn that Rin has been up late at night studying her Father’s will. A hobby that not even I would recommend. After struggling to get out of bed in time for class (Rin really is my spirit animal), she promptly complains about the coldness of her home. As someone who lives in Boston and has never heard of Central Air, this is painfully relatable. Have you had to sit on a toilet seat with ice in the bowl? I don’t recommend it. After the most uncomfortable scene of someone humble-bragging about their rich (literally in this case) background (likely because she can’t to anyone else), she explains that she is in fact a mage and what that entails. Persecution, isolation, and regular communion with forces beyond what most can comprehend. She also goes on to reference the 5 magics (familiar if you’ve played Melty Blood or read Tsukihime, something I’m sure to cover at some point).

What I find to be interesting here is that she fundamentally separates herself from the rest of humanity, treating herself as an outsider despite living what she’d consider ‘an ordinary life’. She shows longing and desire for the things that everyone else has access to and seems to disdain magic on it’s own. But to paraphrase Rin: “Let’s put off difficult discussions, they can wait till they’re old.” As Rin heads out she grabs a rather suspicious (and important) pendant that she managed to find after decoding Tokiomi’s will. It makes me wonder, did he lock up the Tohsaka family heirlooms in various vaults; hoping that someday his heir or maybe one of hers would be able to open them? Was he trolling his daughter? Or am I reading too much into this? Besides her finding the mystical cure-a-spear-to-the-heart jewel, Rin goes on to explain how Tohsaka family magic works. Essentially by slowly storing magic in jewels to draw upon at a later date. I’m reminded of Stormlight and its use of spheres, but that’s besides the point. There’s also a brief discussion of magic crests and how they’re essentially all the magical experiences of her predecessors engraved into her arm. Fun. Rin then goes on to finally leave her house after nearly thirty minutes of getting ready and shows a remarkable knowledge of German. Something that even I haven’t quite managed to master. There’s some brief world building with this area of Fuyuki being a blend of Eastern and Western architecture (as an architect myself this is fascinating to me) and draws a line of parallel between Rin and Shirou. Rin lives in a fancy Western-style mansion and longs for the future, while Shirou lives in the Eastern-style Emiya Residence and yearns for ideals that don’t quite exist anymore. As Rin hurries off to school, a sense of eeriness and unease washes over us, only for us to learn the most terrible and terrifying fact of all. She got up early and so her early morning panic was wasted. Oh and we also meet Ayako who is as exhaustingly energetic as usual. Somehow Rin’s clocks were all an hour fast. She suspects Tokiomi’s work, but I doubt the Tohsaka family Patriarch was one for pranks. Ayako drags Rin off the almost exorbitantly fancy Archery range and they begin to discuss their mutual search for a partner. Have I said that Rin is my spirit animal? I’m sure I must have by now.

This is the first glimpse we get at Rin’s competitive side. Ayako may have been the one to initiate the relationship, but any strong rivalry requires mutual input from both parties. A solid example of this can be seen in the relationship between Sanji and Zoro in One Piece. If I were less astute, I’d prop Ayako as up a potential antagonist later on during the route. As for the contest itself, it’s petty in the most realistic of ways. Attempting to get a boyfriend or girlfriend just to rub it in the face of your rival? I’ve definitely experienced that in my (admittedly brief) lifetime. Well we’ll have to find out another time as I’ve come to realize just how long this document is getting. Join me next week and we’ll continue along with the Rin prologue and hope we get to her summoning of Archer. This has been a fascinating look at the series I’ve adored for so long, just seeing the characters thoughts on the most simple of matters has been an eye-widening experience. This is Olivia Reviews and I can’t wait to see you next time.

[strangertheory]

It's pretty much a given that Dr. Brenner will be returning. Do you think he's in the states still trying to track down El? I always suspected that he may have ran away to Russia so he could continue his experiments and research (maybe that's how the Russians knew about the Upside Down). I've been trying to avoid any BTS photos that could provide any major spoilers so there could be news I missed.

From the way that you contextualized your question, I believe you might prefer to avoid spoilers and any Stranger Things 4 leaks or rumors.

I am going to offer you two answers: one which is in the first part of this blogpost, and one which you can choose to read at your own risk which is below the “read more” divider and that takes into account my current thoughts on a few leaked photos and rumors.

I don’t believe that Dr. Brenner or the Lab was necessarily trying to track down El throughout seasons 2 and 3. Even though the Lab assured Nancy and Jonathan that the people who “made mistakes” in the past are gone (presumably they are referring to Dr. Brenner) the Lab and Dr. Owens seem to have a few different mysterious arrangements with Hopper. What these arrangements might entail have been implied but never openly stated. We do see Owens giving Hopper a birth certificate for Jane and telling him to “give it a year.” We see Hopper getting into cars and having shadowy interactions with people that we can only assume are affiliated with the Lab. But now that Hopper is gone and presumed dead (as of the end of season 3) is it possible that the mysterious arrangement that Hopper had with the Lab and/or with Dr. Owens would be nullified and that El would become the target of the Lab’s interest again? It’s quite possible. And perhaps Dr. Brenner, if he is alive and still doing experiments and research, might return and look to find El again.

I’d like to discuss a second hypothetical reason why I expect we could see Dr. Brenner in season 4, too:

In my opinion El’s conversation with Kali in season 2 foreshadows the return of Dr. Brenner, or perhaps it foreshadows the return of someone who might represent Dr. Brenner in some way.

"Now you're faced with the same choice, Jane: go back into hiding, and hope they don't find you. Or fight, and face him again."

"Face who?"

“The man who calls himself our father.”

Dr. Brenner was conspicuously missing from seasons 2 and 3, but we are led to believe that we haven’t seen the last of him yet. (Dead? Not dead? MIA?)

I theorize that Dr. Brenner will make a return appearance in season 4 because I have been waiting for the writers to reveal the secrets behind El and Will’s shared mysterious connection to each other that is implied to involve (among other things) the Lab and Dr. Brenner.

I believe that El now living with Joyce, Will, and Jonathan sets up the opportunity for this intersection of El’s and Will’s storylines to finally be explored and revealed to us.

I have considered a few very hypothetical ideas regarding what we might see in season 4 based on a few alleged Stranger Things 4 rumors and leaks. Keep in mind I treat all leaks as inconclusive information that is highly unreliable, and I try to avoid making many theories based on rumors and leaks. But! I cannot stop my brain from thinking about the information and ideas being passed around the fandom, and I do have a few ideas and hypotheticals that I’m happy to share with you.

Potential spoiler alert! For the rest of this blogpost I will be talking about a few rumors and alleged photo leaks that have been discussed by fans online over the last few months which influence my thoughts and ideas:

There were photographs leaked of alleged Stranger Things 4 filming in front of a movie theater that listed movies from 1982 such as The Dark Crystal. (1982? Yes! 1982.) This would mean that we might get flashbacks or scenes set before the events of 1983 when Will went missing and El escaped from the Lab.

If we will be seeing events that took place prior to season 1: it is very possible that we could see Dr. Brenner again in flashbacks that are relevant to either El or Will’s history with Dr. Brenner and the Lab.

Could we see Dr. Brenner in the present-day? Maybe, maybe not. El told Kali “Papa is dead.” But perhaps he either A) isn’t actually dead B) will still be a relevant character from El’s past within the story and we will get to see her or other characters interacting with Dr. Brenner in the past.

I believe that season 4 is going to focus heavily in addressing the mysterious connection between El and Will and I also suspect that Dr. Brenner is involved in that in some way.

To refer to the alleged leaked photograph of the movie theater again: the theater name suggests that it is located in “Lincoln Square.” There is a Lincoln Square in New York City and there is also a Lincoln Square in Chicago. We have characters who have connections to both Chicago and New York City in the series, and so it’s hard to determine the precise location of this movie theater. Regardless: we can say with greater confidence that, assuming these leaked photos were of filming for season 4, that this scene they were filming might take place in 1982 and show us events from characters’ pasts. I’ve considered the possibility that since Kali and El pursued a Lab employee (presumably living in or near Chicago in season 2) that it is possible that the Lab might have offices in that city as well as Hawkins. This is one reason I lean towards the possibility of seeing scenes set in Chicago at some point either in season 4 or season 5. (But who knows?)

In season 2 Will expresses his dislike for doctors and tells Joyce “No doctors. You promised!” and Hopper also asks Joyce, while she’s stressing over what to do about Will, whether she wants to “take him back to Chicago.” One can assume from the context of that conversation that Hopper is referring to medical treatment that Will had in the past.

Could Will have been a former patient of Dr. Brenner or another division of the Lab prior to his appointments with Dr. Owens?

I think it’s quite likely.

I’m not convinced that Dr. Brenner is who we think he is, however. I think there’s more to Dr. Brenner’s role in the story than we officially know (yet.)

To return to El and Kali’s conversation again:

"Now you're faced with the same choice, Jane: go back into hiding, and hope they don't find you. Or fight, and face him again."

"Face who?"

“The man who calls himself our father.”

If, as I suspect, Stranger Things is about a DID System and Will and El are both part of it: I have been wondering for a while whether the reason Dr. Brenner has all the Numbers refer to him as their father is because he is in fact actually their father in a more literal sense than simply being the mad scientist raising them to learn to control their powers.

If El is indeed an alter in a DID System, then perhaps “Papa” is actually an NPC or persecutor alter in the DID System based on whoever “real dad” is. Maybe El’s memories of being isolated and abused at the lab is a trauma memory that she experienced as an alter, and Kali is another alter who had similar traumatic experiences.

Maybe when we meet “Dr. Brenner” again he won’t be who he was before, but embodied by a different character who is chillingly familiar to El.

As I mentioned in this recent answer to another Ask: I am curious how El might react if she ever met Lonnie and whether she would recognize him as someone she knows or not.

I realize that my thoughts about Brenner might be a little bit hard to follow: this is because I don’t have any clear-cut expectations for when and how we will see Dr. Brenner again. What I described above is purely speculative and I wouldn’t even consider it a theory. It’s simply a few ideas. :) I’m a lot more comfortable analyzing what we already know about the series and finding hidden connections within the episodes and content that we already have available. When it comes to speculating about super-specific future plot-points I see it as a less exact science and (for me, at least) it can easily become fanfiction. I might have an opinion on the general trajectory of certain character relationships based on foreshadowing that we have been given, but the specific way that they will manifest themselves in the story is beyond what I can say.

Thank you so much for your Ask! Dr. Brenner is a fascinating character and there’s so much that we still don’t know about him. Discussing hypotheticals about Brenner always interests me even though I don’t feel especially confident in any one possible route the story might take and I relegate most of my thoughts about him to the “maybe?” section. But I do think we’ll see him again.

[lloydshoulddyehishair]

Paint Fight | Ninjago Calendar, June

Summary: In which Jay starts a paint fight with his friends because why not.

Sometimes Lloyd asked himself what he had done to deserve everything life threw at him.

As if it wasn’t enough to have his first love turn out to be a manipulative psychopath and have his dad resurrected from the dead as a soulless shell of who he once was, Cloud Kingdom had decided to top it of and throw a demon-invasion and a near-death experience at him.

And Lloyd Garmadon definitely wouldn’t be Lloyd Garmadon if he didn’t isolate himself from everyone close to him after a, yet another, traumatic event.

It was like a routine at this point. Everytime they got back from an adventure Lloyd would usually lock himself up in his room for a few days and then come back like nothing ever happened. He knew it wasn’t healthy - ignoring your emotions and stuffing them into a little box, hoping that they’ll never make it to the light of day, that no one would ever notice how much he really struggled. But there really wasn’t any other alternative for him, it was the only way he knew to cope and the others had stopped trying to get him to talk a long time ago.

Or at least so he thought, because right now the leader's door was being opened and revealed frizzy red hair and nervous blue eyes staring at him.

“Hey Lloyd, uhm, could I ask you something?”

“If this is about my Starfarer Video Game you can just take it-”

“N, no, no!”, his smaller friend interrupted him and sat down on his bed, playing with his fingers in an anxious manner, avoiding his gaze.

"You know, you've been isolating yourself and- I mean I totally get that, I get why, but- I miss doing stuff with y'all.", Lloyd blinked, trying to process what Jay was telling him. Jay usually wasn’t one to reach out like that, normally he’d keep to himself and just spend even more time with Cole and Nya, while being sad about the fact that he missed the others.

“But if you don’t want to, that’s fine of course! Don’t feel pressured, especially since you’re still recovering.”, the blond winced.

If there was one thing he hated most in the world it was his friends’ pity.

“It’s fine. I’ll join y’all.”, the redheads eyes lit up as that stupid grin - that was just  so jay - appeared on his face. 

“Great, I already got something planned!”

------

Surprisingly Lloyd wishes he had never agreed to Jay's offer. 

It wasn't that he didn't like spending time with his family, it was just that he didn't really know how to talk to them anymore. As a matter of fact it seemed like no one really did. The silence between them as they cleaned the dust off of the walls, like Jay had told them to, was almost suffocating.

“Why are we even doing this?”, Kai spoke up as he rolled his eyes in frustration. “Has Jay turned into Sensei Wu now and makes us do chores?”, Lloyd couldn’t help but chuckle.

Zane eyed them with a tiny smirk before continuing the task. “Well, I personally find cleaning to be very calming.”

“If that’s the case I’ll gladly have you clean my room!”, Jay called out as he stumbled outside with multiple buckets of paint, which sooner than later found themselves tumbling to the floor. “Now that didn’t go to plan.”, he muttered. “Ayways! Everyone come get their bucket!”

The others started walking up to him, taking the bucket of their respective colour.

“I don’t mean to sound like I’m judging or something but what exactly is your plan?”

“Oh Lloyd, isn’t it obvious? We’re going to paint the walls!”

All eyes fell on Jay in absolute disbelief.

“Sensei Wu will kill us! We can’t just paint the walls!”

“Going after our reputation this monastery won’t stand for long anyways. I give it 6 months before it is destroyed again.”, Nya sighed as she went to grab a paintbrush out of a bag Jay had brought with him.

Cole winced. He was more than familiar with the fate their homes usually faced. “I mean, you’re not wrong but still, you know? I don’t think Sensei is going to be too pleased.”

“Good thing he isn’t supposed to be back before tomorrow, so we got enough time to plan our escape.”, the Blue Ninja grinned, giving everyone a brush to paint with.

Maybe he didn’t regret this too much after all.

------

“Nya, if I was a worm, would you still love me?”

“I swear if you don’t shut your mouth-”

------

“Should I go inside and get us some ice cream?”, Zane asked, interrupting the silence that had once again fallen between them after they had started their paintings on the walls.

Cole’s eyes practically begged his friend to do what he had just offered. “Please, it’s so hot!”

“It’s not, it’s… rather mild, I guess.”

“Kai, no offence but you are literally the Master of Fire.”, Lloyd smirked slightly. “But yes Zane, it would be really nice if you could do that.”, he gave his nindroid friend one more smile before he stepped inside, making his way to the kitchen.

“You know, Cole, I think paint is fairly cold.”

“What are you hinting at, Bluebell-”, next thing they knew chaos erupted.

Cole watched the blue paint dripping from his face to the ground with a shocked expression.

“Any cooler?”, the Master of Lightning grinned at him.

“I’ll show you ‘cooler’!”, Cole yelled out, grabbing his own bucket and running after his best friend.

“Nya, save me!”, she couldn’t help but laugh at her boyfriend’ childishness.

“Coming!”, she calls, grabbing a bucket, as did her brother.

Sometimes Lloyd loved his family for being so stupid.

------

And sometimes Lloyd hated himself for being stupid.

You would think that after near-death experience number 37 and just barely getting away with a concussion and multiple bruises that he would start to pay more attention to his surroundings and be more careful.

You would also think wrong because as it turns out “careful” was something that just didn’t suit the blond.

And before he knew it he slipped on a puddle of paint and landed head first on the ground.

A pained moan escaped his mouth as his vision darkened for a second, everything started spinning.

Lloyd didn’t even get to sit up before Kai was already crouching down next to him, eyeing him in worry and grabbing his arm.

“Gosh Lloyd, you need to watch out, you’re still hurt!”, the younger tried to rid himself of his brother's grip, in vain. He rolled his eyes in annoyance.

"Kai, I'm okay! Can you please just-"

"You need to be more careful! I always tell you that and you never listen! When will you start listening to me? When it’s too late?", suddenly everything around Lloyd seemed to come to an halt.

He knew Kai meant well, he always did, but he hated it more than anything when his brothers babyed him.

"Kai, I absolutely do not want your pity.", he spoke more harshly than he wanted to, pulling away from the brunette and standing up again.

“I’m not pitying you, I’m watching out for you-”

“Well you’re most certainly not doing a good job at it then.”, Lloyd had regretted many things in his life so far, releasing the Serpentine, banishing his father to the Departed Realm, but this - this was probably one of the actions he regretted most in his life so far.

Kai’s eyes widened in shock.

“This isn’t fair.”

“Life hasn’t been fair to us for a long while now Kai and you know tha-”, the teens sentence died in his throat as a loud noise interrupted them.

The elder gasped as he put his hand on his - now pink stained - hair. “Hey, watch the hair!”

"Where the hell did you get that from?!", Lloyd yells, hiding himself behind his big brother

Nya simply grinned, pointing the paint-gun in their direction once again.

"I have my ways."

------

“I say we all team up on Jay!”, Cole calls out across the yard.

“What?! 5 against 1? That’s unfair!”, 

“Fair?”, Lloyd yells as he grabbed another bucket filled with red paint. “Fair isn’t a word where I come from!”, he screams, running after Jay, eventually cornering him with the help of the others.

“Oh come on guys.”, the lightning ninja laughs nervously. “It doesn’t have to end like this.”

“It started with you, it will end with you.”, Kai smirks.

They were ready to empty their paint buckets over his head, that was until they heard someone clear their throat behind them.

In shock they turned around, just to meet stern yellow eyes.

“What’s the matter of this.”

“Sensei Wu! I thought you weren’t supposed to be back until-”

“Tomorrow, yes.”, the old sensei cut Nya off. “But my trip was cut short, so I went home just to be greeted by-”, he looked around himself, at the stained floor, puddles of now half dried paint and empty metal buckets. “-this.”

“I promise Sensei, we will clean everything up!”, the blond reassured his uncle.

“Lloyd?”, he looked at the others in disbelief. “You let my nephew join in on this? You know he is still recovering! As are you Cole!”

“I swear Sensei, I’m feeling way better-”

“No. I don’t want to hear it. Starting tomorrow you will clean this mess up and we will start training again. Every day you will have-”

Jay gasped. “Sensei, no! Please!”

“-Sunrise training.”, this six groaned in unison. “Except for Cole and Lloyd, you’ll join when I tell you to, until then you’ll stay in bed.”

“Yes, Sensei.”, they bowed slightly, waiting for Wu to leave.

Just as Sensei stepped inside the monastery, Zane stepped back outside in the yard, ice cream in hand. His face as he tried to understand what had caused the chaos and the stains on his friends’ clothes made them all start to laugh.

Maybe today hadn’t been as bad as Lloyd thought it would be.

------

Once again the part-human found himself alone, this time though not in his room but watching the sunset on the stairs in front of the monastery and eating the ice cream Zane had brought them. His thoughts remained the same however. Guilt was slowly starting to consume his mind, especially after the short interaction he had shared with Kai during the paint fight. 

He smiled slightly. The childish fight was probably the most fun he had had since everything with the Sons of Garmadon started to unravel. 

He didn’t like to think about it. It made him sad, thinking about how broken and alone he had felt, still did at sometimes.

He also didn’t like to think about all the sleepless nights he had spent, wondering why his friends had to die. Of course they hadn’t actually been dead, but sometimes - just sometimes - Lloyd was scared that if he closed his eyes for too long that they would slip away again.

Out of the corner of his eye he saw a red figure approaching and sitting down next to him, interrupting his thoughts.

He said nothing, did nothing, simply staring ahead - waiting for Lloyd to make the first move. 

“You know.”, the blond said, staring forward, just like his brother did. “I didn’t want to snap at you like that. Earlier today, I mean.”, he sighed as he placed his chin in his palm. "None of it was your fault..", Kai winced. 

"I know you didn't want to.", he felt a hand being put on his shoulder. "I just wish you wouldn't always throw yourself into danger. I know it's hypocritical of me to say this but-", the elder paused and took his hand. "You need to start thinking things through.", Lloyd laughed. 

"You're one to talk." 

Kai's face softened. "I know, I haven't been the best example but that's why I want you to be better, you know?”

Lloyd just nodded, leaning his head against his brother's shoulder.

“I don’t want to someday wait for you to come back from a mission and have you-”, he let out a heavy sigh as he squeezed the smaller’s shoulder. “Never return.”

“I get that, I feel the same about you guys.”

“I’d sure hope so. I mean who else could you have paint fights with if not for us.”, the Master of Fire chuckles slightly before standing up again. “But we should probably head inside before Sensei beats our asses, especially yours.”, he pauses as he runs his hand through his messed up hair. “Also should probably wash that out.”

“I don’t know.”,the younger grins as he walks towards the monastery. “Pink suits you.”

“Please, Zane has already claimed pink, thanks to you.”, Kai laughs. “Maybe I’ll go orange.”

“Don’t give me ideas because I absolutely will dye your hair in your sleep.”

“Oh, I don’t think so, Green Machine!”, he calls out sprinting towards him, making Lloyd run from him in a laughing fit.

Yeah, today was definitely not as bad as he had thought it would be.

[verdantsyren]

Catra’s hair throughout She Ra and how it was not given the treatment it deserved: an essay

This is a more in depth analysis of Catra’s hair throughout She Ra, inspired by this post here and the replies on it. I highly recommend reading the replies, as they have excellent information about the horrible effects of imposed hair cutting on different cultures.

I do think that Prime cutting Catra’s hair could’ve been a really powerful statement on trauma and removed anatomy if they had properly explored it more. Hair is such a powerful way to convey the personality or emotions of another person, and should absolutely be utilized in this kind of storytelling, but you have to utilize it correctly. 

For example, I think Catra removing her ear tufts because that’s how Shadow Weaver manipulates her is a really good way to show her emotional state; Catra starts losing pieces of herself and sometimes even removing said pieces of herself to try and protect herself.

However, She Ra has a problem in how they do this: They don’t show or really mention it in the show, at all.

Correct me if I’m wrong, but do they actually mention Catra cutting her hair tufts at all? They certainly don’t show it. Hell, I don’t remember any other characters really mentioning it.

Can you imagine how powerful it would’ve been to see Catra, so sick of abuse and manipulation, cut off her ear tufts at the sink or on top of her perch in the Fright Zone? Watch the hair sit on the floor or float away in the wind, Catra steel her face and smooth down her hair. We could’ve watched her leave those vulnerabilities in the bathroom, or climb down from her perch with a new steel in her gaze. There didn’t have to be dialogue about Shadow Weaver or anything, just Catra and her hair. It could’ve added more to her character.

Or they could’ve had Adora notice. You know, Catra’s best friend through childhood/enemy who would most definitely notice a change like that? They could’ve had Adora in some way mention them being gone, and you just see this brief change in Catra’s expression, or a slip up, or something that gives away what getting rid of the tufts meant to her. 

These could’ve been so powerful. But instead it isn’t even addressed, only really explained outside of the show.

I do think that in Season 4, they do a good job of showing Catra trying to control her hair. She smooths it down whenever she gets frustrated or upset, or is in some way trying to control herself. It’s a developed anxious motion, something people with anxiety often have. I personally used to fiddle with my hair often, a nervous tick I developed as a child. I think it helps highlight how much she desperately craves control of herself, and her hair seems to be the only way she really can try.

Then Season 5 hits. And I honestly hate the fact that they don’t address Catra’s short hair. Prime cutting Catra’s hair is huge, because it removes the one thing throughout the show that she undoubtedly controlled. Beforehand, Catra cutting her hair was a sign of her trying to shed her past abuse. But with Prime, him cutting her hair is abuse. Him cutting her hair shows that she is without any anatomy while on Prime’s Ship. But again, the problem here is that they don’t address it on the show, and it’s really frustrating because there is so much they could’ve done with this. It could’ve set Catra’s redemption story apart because OP is correct, she did not get the choice.

Again, imagine a scene with Catra where she wakes up on the BFS’s ship. She starts panicking, but reaches up to smooth down her hair like she did literally ALL OF SEASON 4, but it stops once she gets to her neck. Imagine her scrambling for a mirror/reflective surface to see what she looks like, and the broken face when she realizes that the one thing she used to control is gone. Maybe have the faint whisper of Horde Prime in the background, or the ghost of scissors clipping together. A haunting wisp of memory.

Imagine after that, maybe Adora or Bow mention her hair, and Catra freaks out. Glimmer goes and finds Catra later messing with her hair, freaking out because she’s never had hair like this before and it wasn’t her choice and she never gets to choose--

But Glimmer is there, and Glimmer’s had short hair for years. And Glimmer tells Catra that she’ll help her style it the way she wants, because she understands what it’s like to lose control to Horde Prime. They then show Catra deciding to cut it shorter with Glimmer’s help. Not only does it show her trying to have some agency over herself in this dire situation, but it shows her and Glimmer once again connecting over shared trauma and experiences. And maybe even after they fix up her hair, Catra is still allowed to mourn; she still reaches for the hair that isn’t there, or she starts looking for different ways to style it with Glimmer’s help. Maybe a few comments about her being excited to grow it out again.

Something like that could’ve been so good! I think that, acknowledging Catra’s emotions and actions when she changes herself, would’ve made her redemption so much better. Because here’s the main issue with Catra cutting her hair: in the show, it doesn’t add anything to her redemption. 

For example, when Korra cuts her hair in Legend of Korra, that is her choice. She is the one making the change. It shows that she is the one working on herself, recovering from her trauma. Obviously Korra isn’t really going through a redemption arc like Catra, but they are still both going through significant changes after traumatic events. 

However, in Catra’s case, what would’ve changed if Prime had left her hair the same? Nothing. Nobody mentioned it in the first place, it didn’t seem to affect Catra at all. He could’ve put her hair in a ponytail and still achieved the same end. 

That’s what, at least to me, is really frustrating about Catra’s hair change in season 5 from a storyteller’s standpoint; in the show and to the characters, it doesn’t really add anything to her redemption. Whereas with the changes I stated above, it could’ve been a point of her trying to reclaim her anatomy, connecting with those around her, and a whole other load of things better writers than I could come up with. And this would’ve only been strengthened by better highlighting the changes she made to her hair in earlier seasons!

And finally, in the original post I linked up top, the replies talked a lot about how hair is so important to other cultures, and Prime cutting Catra’s hair without consent to make her fit in with his clones is incredibly similar to how white colonizers cut native people’s hair to force them to assimilate into white culture. She Ra could’ve been a commentary on how absolutely horrible and harmful this sort of practice is by showing how negatively it affects Catra. But it didn’t do any of that. It could’ve given Catra a new avenue of agency, but it didn’t. She Ra could’ve done so much more for this part of her redemption arc, and they could’ve started a discussion on the terrors of assimilation in colonization, but they didn’t.

Like I said up top, I highly recommend reading those replies on the original post to learn more and educate yourself about this topic. Thank you to anyone who read this, and I’m sorry it’s such a chunk of text. Once I saw the original post, I just couldn’t think about anything else til I wrote this beast of a text post.

[yanderecandystore]

bullies x final girl reader? like, they were recently the only survivor of a killing and they’re being seen as a badass ( rightfully so )? bonus points if the reader seems like ur stereotypical ditzy cheerleader

Honestly, I love this??

Recently I've been getting into Dead by Daylight and Slasher movies, but because I'm just too much of an uncultured swine, I can't get enough courage to open the requests for DBD headcanons.

I wish I could put more fandoms on the masterlist, but because I only follow a couple of niche fandoms (some of those weird ones, ya know?) I'm always a little too worried about saying my headcanons for them. I'm afraid of getting out of character 😂😅

🍭꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍮꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍰꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍮꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖🍭

Final Girl (yes, I know, really creative, I'm lazy okay?) - [Yandere!Bully Ocs x Survivor!Reader - Headcanon]:

Who would've guessed that someone like you would face such a tragedy so soon? A big event that would change people's perspective and morals due to the traumatic experiences, in a span of a day?

Or better question, who would've guessed that you would face everything in such a calm manner? Talk with your classmates like it was a common Monday afternoon.

Let's recap a bit, it was Friday when it happened, you were going back home and it was already getting dark and everyone was already either getting home after work, or leaving their home to go to work.

Your classes had just ended, but you still needed some work to do inside the gym, organizing some of the stuff that you and your friends used for practice.

You see, it's when the sun is starting to come down and everyone inside the city is being active and getting to one place to another, the exact moment when the city feels lively, that people feel more comfortable to just care about their business.

After all, it's a lot safer when there are a hundred strangers walking around. No one would be crazy to try to pull a move when there are so many witnesses.

But that's the catch, when the sunset ends and the moon starts coming into vision, it's the exact opposite of the calm daylight. It all depends on where you're going and how long does it take for you to get there.

Even if you live near the richest places with those beautiful villas, you still have a chance, even if it's minimum, to get killed in those silent streets. That's why everyone around that area is known to walk fast at night and be straight to the point.

But then again, you weren't going to the rich area of the city, no, you were going home, in a more moderate area.

I say moderate, because although crimes aren't really high around your house, it's not exactly a calm walk until you get home.

It would be worse if none of the students lived close to you. At least there are a couple of people to talk with, even if some of them are strangers or not really close to you.

It would be a shame if someone were to follow this group of people that aren't armed or prepared in any way, shape or form-

Oh no, wait!-

You can't like the whole event wasn't really traumatic, it's just that, your brain had blocked a couple of memories, you still have a hard time believing any of it happened.

In one second, you're in a group of 6, on the other, you're in a group of 5. "Someone must have got lost along the way", that's what the others in the group said, trying to come up with more positive interpretations while ignoring the worrying inside their heads.

" Everything is fine, we'll see Marie on school Monday surely!"

" She probably just went the other way, maybe she lives on another street and we didn't hear her say goodbye, that's all."

It was always like this, someone would ask where she could be, and someone would give them fake hopes that she was alright. But deep down you all knew she wasn't.

Something in the air wasn't right and everyone knew that. Even if y'all didn't really know each other (as some of these students were from other classes), you could still feel the same worries that Marie's classmate was feeling. He was getting worried that his classmate just disappeared out of nowhere.

He only had known her for a week, he told you explaining why he didn't know where she lived as she never told him. He decided that he would go back and see if she got lost or was needing help. And so, your group was considering if they should go after him or wait for them.

Or just continue like nothing happened.

After some minutes standing up and not seeing any sign of the two, you all decided to go home, as waiting any longer in the dark would be really dangerous.

So there was you and three strangers that were trying to break the ice as best as they could, but nothing seemed to change how terrible you were feeling inside, knowing that something could have happened.

You did make them laugh a bit though, you were fun to be around, and maybe y'all could have been friends.

But things didn't work out that way, things just got worse and worse that night. You were 6, then 5, then 4, then 1.

The killer wanted to go one by one, but he didn't think you or any of the other students would fight back. He shouldn't have attacked a group of six to be honest.

You managed to escape his grasp and turn to another direction so he couldn't follow you to your house, you were panicking, but using skills that you gained by being a cheerleader, you managed to reach a police station nearby.

Honestly, who said that cheerleaders are dumb just ate a mouthful of grass.

Of course they took some time to believe you, thinking it was a prank at first, but giving you a second glance it was obvious you were panicking and had run miles to get there.

They didn't find the killer sadly, but at least they found the bodies that were hidden in some of the alleys, a really sloppy killer, probably didn't have a plan B to cover his tracks.

The incident was all over the news, there wasn't a person who hasn't heard of what you've been through, people even want to have interviews with you, for you to tell the full story and experience, but honestly you're just too tired for that.

You wish you could rest a bit before going back to your daily life, since a lot of the things that happened that night are now a blank canvas inside your brain.

You weren't expecting people to treat you with so much respect though, it was… Pretty heartwarming!

People never have given you the benefit of the doubt, but now your classmates act like you're movie badass or something, but you can't understand why, you only did basic parkour skills to reach the station. You don't think it was a big deal at all!

( Although the cameras around those streets shown you making fucking backflips to jump a wall, but moving on-)

Even the twins that acted like mediocre bullies towards you actually show some respect for once. It's…. A really weird change and you don't know how to feel about it!?

But can you blame them? They were sitting in their couch messing around with their phones and out of nowhere the latest news passing on their TV is:

" Five students from Amaryllis Academy have been found dead at seven p.m by Police Officer Marcella Diaz, after a student named [Y/N] [L/N] had appeared at the Police Station claiming that a killer was following them all night-"

Like, can you imagine hearing that your soon to be wife had almost fucking died by some creep following them???! The audacity of some people, honestly.

But seriously, after hearing your name being mentioned in TV, they freaked out! Something terrible could have happened to you and they wouldn't know about it!

If you were dead they wouldn't forgive themselves even if they don't have anything to do with the incident. They wouldn't be able to sleep at night knowing that not only did you die and that the creep is lurking around somewhere, they wouldn't be able to tell you that they love you and that they're really sorry that they were assholes, and they will burn the man that dared touch you, and-

You know, some people say that after an extreme experience like this, a person would be reborned in a way. But honestly, you feel like your normal self, it just feels like the world is a lot different now. Maybe your perspective had changed, or maybe you did get reborn.

For someone that used to see the world as a great place, you're starting to see that not everything is perfect, and that things like this happen all the time.

That thought kinda scares you.

Lately, the twins have been really friendly towards you, almost suffocatingly so. They even started to welcome you inside their family's lamborghini so they could take you home.

They don't want you to go through anything like that ever again. You even began to go into their house on the weekends.

These past few weeks have been insane, you almost forgot how to breathe when you saw on the news that the body of the killer of your classmates had been found in a parking lot, burned to death.

You didn't know how to react, it was only two weeks after the incident, and he is found dead almost turning into ashes. It's so disturbing, that if it wasn't for the reassuring hug Alexandra has given you, you would fall flat on the floor.

You….. Are absolutely lost for words.

You guess… Maybe you don't need to be worried about him anymore….

🍭꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍮꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍰꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍮꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖🍭

[jonny-byerss]

Why Jancy Is Endgame

So, recently, I’ve seen quite a bit of Jancy hate which I literally don’t understand, because how can you look at Jancy and think “Wow, I hate them”...like, it genuinely baffles me that people don’t ship Jancy, like how? They have SO MUCH CHEMISTRY it’s unreal. In all three seasons, it’s evident that there’s something more between them than just “monster hunting partners”. So, recently, I have been asking multiple people including my irl friends why they think Jancy is endgame and this is what I’ve come up with.

1.) The Duffers Aren’t Dumb

Even though quite a bit of people are disappointed with the way they’ve taken their writing, you have to admit one thing: they aren’t dumb. They’ve been setting Jancy up to be canon since S1, and fans have been rooting for them to get together since S1. It’s not until Steve’s turn-around that people started hating on Jancy.

Jancy is definitely more popular than Stancy for sure. To a majority of fans, even if Jancy isn’t their favorite Stranger Things ship, they still at least ship it. And, with the exception of hardcore Steve stans, most people who like Steve as a character admit that Jonathan and Nancy fit better together than Steve and Nancy ever did. We know the Duffers like to give in to what a majority of fans want, and Jancy seems to be what a majority of fans want.

There’s 3 core ships that the Duffers have been building up since S1. Those are Jopper, Jancy, and Mileven. It’s obvious in S1 that these ships are going to become canon eventually, and they’re also the three core ships of the show that people love. They also tend to focus on these three relationships quite a bit in their writing, with the majority of major relationship moments being with these three ships, especially Mileven. It’s obvious they want us to root for these ships.

The main point I’m trying to make is the Duffers have been setting Jancy up to be canon since S1. They have shown us many moments in all three seasons that show us just how much chemistry Jancy has. From the bed scene in S1, to the hallway scene in S2, they’re obviously trying to show us that Jancy is meant to get together.

Not only that, but Jancy was ACTUALLY supposed to be canon in S1. I don’t know how many people know this, but Steve was supposed to die in S1, and Jancy was supposed to get together. The writers liked Joe Keery so they decided they needed to find a way to keep him on the show. It’s clear to me that the writers themselves are rooting for Jancy, which means that they want us to root for Jancy too.

I’m not here to say how the Duffers should write the next seasons, and I myself don’t know what happens in the future seasons, but I do see the clues that the Duffers have given us since S1 and I also believe that the Duffers know what they’re doing. They know what the majority of fans want and it’s clear to me that they want us to root for Jancy, so obviously they’re gonna keep them together.

2.) THAT Ending Scene In S3

A lot of people that say “Jancy has no chemistry” clearly have not seen their last scene in S3. To me, that scene is a promise. A promise to each other and to us that Jancy is in it for each other.

In this scene, you can see that they are so painfully in love. They don’t want to leave each other. You can tell it breaks both of their hearts that they have to separate for a bit.

I could do a whole analysis of this scene, and I just might do that later, but to me, what they’re saying to each other is “We’ve been through so much together, why can’t we go through a little more?”

Sure, long-distance would be harder in the 80s, but I do believe that their love is strong enough to last. They clearly both love each other very much. And there’s always phone calls and letters and visiting each other on breaks.

When thinking of the LDRs that the Byers move caused, lots of people think of Mileven, but Jancy is actually way more likely to be endgame than Mileven at this point. We don’t know what happens in future seasons or if the Byers eventually move back, but we do know that Jonathan and Nancy are seniors in high school and almost 18. Mike and Eleven are barely starting high school and have more time to be apart than Jancy does. Once Jancy graduates, they can do whatever they want. Sure, one could say that Jonathan might feel an obligation to stay with his family, but we also know that he has an ambition for NYU. We have no idea what Nancy wants. I can honestly see her go to college for journalism or something similar. What’s to stop her from going to NYU or somewhere in NY with Jonathan?

We don’t know what the Duffers have in store for Jancy’s future, but I trust that they can give Jancy the perfect ending they deserve. That scene in S3 has so much underlying meaning to it, like the fact that the song that play in the background during it is called “You’re a Fighter”. I have a whole different thing planned on analyzing that scene, and I’ll post that later, but basically, with that scene, to me, the Duffers are trying to say “They’re in this for each other. They’re so in love that they’re going to make it work”

3) They are the most mature relationship on the show

I’ve seen quite a few people say that the argument they had in S3 is “proof they are incompatible” but that is simply not true. In fact, if anything, it shows how they are exactly the opposite. Here’s why.

So, every couple fights. It’s the ability to work through a fight and come out stronger and more understanding that shows just how committed a couple is to each other. Jonathan and Nancy are a prime example of this.

Jonathan and Nancy come from different backgrounds. This argument of “I’m poor” and “People are being sexist towards me” is a very adult argument. I mean, most teenage couples you see have fights about jealousy-type crap. Jancy’s fight is a fight that adults would have. That’s why I believe they are a very mature couple.

Not only that, but the key thing to remember is that they both admitted that they felt bad for what they said and apologized, reaffirming their commitment to each other. This is a fight that they can grow from as a result. Because they apologized and acknowledged their wrong-doings, they have a better foundation for understanding each other in the future and they can grow as a couple. This can also give them a perspective on life that maybe they didn’t think about before.

Honestly, Jancy has been through a lot crap together so they kind of have to be mature. Plus, Jonathan himself had to grow up faster than most children, which gives him a perspective on life that he most likely passed on to Nancy.

This is why I believe Jancy is the most mature couple. Instead of letting their fight get the best of them, they acknowledged their wrong-doings and became more understanding of each other as a result. It takes real maturity to do something like that.

The reason I compare them to the other couples is because, look at Mileven’s fight in S3. It seems sort of childish compared to Jancy’s. And Lumax has broken up 5 times apparently. And Jopper, gosh, they have a lot of issues to work out. Jancy seems to have effectively worked out their differences and become stronger as a result.

Charlie Heaton (Jonathan) himself said that when he first read the S3 script, he thought that Jancy seemed like a married couple, which I think says a lot about their relationship. They are so mature and comfortable with each other like that. He also said this, which basically sums up what I said, here:

4) They are more than just “shared trauma”

I’ve seen a lot of people criticize Jancy by saying stuff like “Shared trauma isn’t a good foundation for a relationship”, but I’m about to prove why that’s bullcrap, because Jancy is more than their shared trauma.

So, shared trauma seems to be what the writers like to point out about their relationship. In the ending scene in S3, Jonathan tells Nancy “We’ve got shared trauma”. He is referring to what Murray said to them in S2 when he was telling them why they should get together. Just because “shared trauma” is what Murray emphasized, doesn’t mean it’s their only foundation.

I’d quickly like to point out though, that shared trauma is actually a real life relationship trope and there are real-life couples founded on this. But, I’d also like to point out that Jancy’s trauma isn’t just any trauma. They didn’t just fight in Vietnam together or something, like it’s not every day your loved one gets kidnapped by an otherworldly demon.

I think the main emphasis that the show is focusing on when they say “shared trauma” is the scars. I mean, when Jonathan said that line in S3, he was touching Nancy’s scar that he shares with her. They are the only two people with those matching scars. Those scars are something that unites them and reminds them of the past they share.

Their “trauma” isn’t just how they met either. I mean, they obviously knew each other before the events of S1. Their brothers are best friends. I’m not saying they were friends or anything, but they were definitely acquaintances.

Their trauma is how they grew closer. I mean, before their first traumatic experience, they seemed to be getting on each other’s nerves a bit. It’s not until Nancy almost became Demogorgon lunch that they started realizing they could trust each other. After that, they realized they worked well together and they may or may not have fallen in love.

Also, let’s not forget all the flirting they did before their traumatic experience. The darkroom, even the target practice scene.

I think the key thing to remember with their trauma though is that, because they both went through similar experiences, they understand each other in that way. I mean, part of Stancy breaking up was because Steve didn’t realize the trauma she was going through and didn’t understand fully how to help her. Jonathan understood in a way what she was feeling because he went through something similar.

And yeah, shared trauma might not be a good foundation, because obviously there’s other things to consider in a relationship, but if there’s anything S3 showed us it’s that Jancy knows how to communicate and work through their problems, so clearly that’s not an issue for them.

5) The love triangle is done

I’ve seen some online articles that say things like “Now that Jonathan is gone, Nancy will go back with Steve”. I’ve even heard people say “Nancy will go with Robin”. Both of those are bullcrap.

First of all, Stancy’s arc is finished. S2 showed us how incompatible they were by showing how Steve hasn’t been a good support system for Nancy and showing that Nancy no longer loved Steve. Nancy obviously felt something more for Jonathan, who could support her in a better way than Steve could, because Jonathan had similar experiences. After they broke up, they were done. And when Jonathan and Nancy kissed the love triangle was over. It was solved.

I think most of the fans can agree that they are glad the love triangle was solved, that way Nancy’s story can be about more than just boys. It would be stupid for the Duffers to bring it back and it would ruin every ounce of character development that Steve and Nancy have gone through. And I am confident that the Duffers aren’t stupid.

Part of Steve’s S2 arc is getting over Nancy and accepting that she no longer loves him and even finding a friend in Dustin. Part of Nancy’s arc in S2 was realizing she should embrace that girl she was for a week in November 1983. She gets justice for Barb and even embraces her feelings for the school outcast. Nancy and Steve can still be friends, and even Jonathan and Steve, but that’s it. Nothing more. It’s been decided that Nancy doesn’t love Steve, she loves Jonathan. Even if Jonathan is far away, it’s possible to love him from a distance.

And about Robin and Nancy, it’s also highly unlikely. Again, I think most fans are tired of Nancy’s love life and love triangle and are glad it’s over. Adding Robin to the mix would make it even more complicated.

First of all, it’s not canon that Nancy is bisexual. The only canon LGBT character is Robin. It is implied that Will may be as well, but nothing has been confirmed.

I can see Robin and Nancy being good friends, but Robin did call her a priss in S3 and also, it’s like an unspoken rule in best-friendship that you don’t date their exes. Robin and Steve are best friends. This would break that rule.

I do know, based on leaked photos, Nancy and Robin most likely work together (maybe even with Steve) in S4. I believe, however, that the relationship is fully platonic. It would be nice for Nancy to have a friend that’s a girl after her loss of Barb, and Robin is a good person and would be a great friend for Nancy. I also believe, however, that Nancy is 100% dedicated to Jonathan (based on the last scene in S3) and will only be working with Robin (and maybe Steve) because they know something that would be useful.

Basically, what I’m trying to say is: Nancy’s love life arc has ended. It’s been decided that Nancy doesn’t love Steve and he can’t give her what she wants. And I think most Ronance shippers are just trolls, tbh. No one seems really serious about any Nancy and Robin relationship that’s anything more than platonic.

———————

And I think that about sums up why I believe Jancy is endgame. Jonathan and Nancy clearly love and care for each other very much as shown in all three seasons. Plus, there’s the fact that THEIR ACTORS ARE LITERALLY DATING IN REAL LIFE! (Seriously both Jancy and Natarlie are relationship goals).

I am extremely confident that even if Jancy does break up at some point, it won’t be for long and they’ll somehow find their way back to each other because they are soulmates. That is a guarantee. I have full confidence that the Duffers can give their relationship the perfect ending they deserve. I’d like to hear your guys’ feedback (please try to keep negativity away). Do you believe Jancy is endgame?

And here’s proof that Jancy loves each other: